#you may wonder what her quality of life was like and tbh all signs pointed to 'fine'

[wild-at-mind]

Any time a bird is in captivity of any kind without fail there’s someone who shows up and goes ‘:( so sad, it should be FREE!’ Which, I’m very aware of the problems with cagebirds, but someone does this every time including when the bird in question is very clearly a genetic freak of some sort. For example, a rescue aviary near me used to have a lovely fantail dove, who according to volunteers was extremely friendly and loved cuddles and sitting on people’s heads. She’s passed away now, sadly, but on the aviary facebook there’s an old video of her and someone has put one of those comments along the lines of she should be in the wild. But she was so visibly a product of human selective breeding it was unreal. She had a huge, bulgy chest and her neck was bent so far back that the resting position of her head was on her back. If her eyes weren’t on the sides of her head she wouldn’t have been able to see over her own chest. Not all fantail doves look like this, but this one was so extreme looking that they had a little sign on the aviary reassuring people she was alright. I just wondered where exactly this commenter imagined she would belong if all the birds in the aviary were released into the wild and somehow back into their ideal habitats. There’s nowhere in the world outside of in the care of humans where a bird looking like that would be remotely ok.

[ecliip]

SLUGCAT REDESIGNS YIPPEE

hello rain world community please click for higher quality (downpour spoilers btw)

also lots of design rambling underneath the cut. warning its very long and all over the place

-OKAYOKAY so you may notice that Survivor, Monk, and Gourmand all have similar markings- darker back patch, light tummy, tipped ears/stalks- this is because Gourmand is their grandpa in my interpretation!! they share traits because famly..

-neither Survivor nor Monk are fully grown, though Survivor is almost an adult. theyre the slugcat equivalent of teenagers. thats why theyre a little shorter than everyone else. however Enot and Rivulet are fully grown, Rivulet is just built for a different environment and Enots a fucked up inversion of Survivor

-Hunter, of course, gots the rots. i dont know why nobody utilizes Hunters scarred eye in HLL designs tbh- because the scar and the closed eye together make an X shape. and you know what else has an X shape? rot cyst. food for your thoughts :)

-the feds don't want you to know this but you can make any slugcat of your choice as fat and round as you want and nobody can stop you because they are your slugcat designs. anyways chubby arti :) and chubby nightcat :) and plump monk :)

-Nightcat has little silver splotches because I SAID SO. the silver bits by their eyes were actually inspired by Moonwatcher from Wings of Fire with those silver teardrop scales by her eyes, i always thought that was cool. my WoF phase haunts me to this day,,, also Nightcats ears point sideways because its cute

-okay you're probably wondering what the FUCK is up with Enot. the answer: who knows??? i made them La Creatura. theyre a little freak of nature who shouldnt exist but they glitched into existence or something and they have four ears and four hands and six eyes as a result

-Gourm... im love Gourm... theyre the second tallest slugcat, Spearmaster takes first place as resident stickbug

-okay so! if you may notice, pre-canon event Arti and current Arti have some differences. previous Arti has some little scars, and a darker end to their tail. current Arti has burns that cover those. thats intentional! i like to think that when the incident happened, the anger and grief took them over, erasing all personhood in the eyes of both the scavs and theirself in favor of carnage and fury and destruction. the burns represent that. the signs of a life well lived, that little dot of personhood? gone, replaced only by rage and hurting and memories of a tragic incident. (dont worry Arti fans in my little au they arent sad and enraged forever, they do heal. eventually.)

-more design notes about Arti but their right leg is burnt and hurts to put too much pressure on, so they prefer exploding if they have a long distance to cover or somewhere to reach. also, i gave Arti a tailtip that resembles a wick that was a result of the burn scars, thank you @pansear-doodles for bein cool about people takin inspiration from your amazing designs!!

-Spearmaster is comically tall and i love that. they also have Suns's logo on the back of their head. its like a watermark! Hunter doesn't have a watermark because in my interpretation, the rot stuff was intentional, added by NSH as a ticking time bomb as a sort of motivation for Hunter, so like why bother claiming a slugcat thats gonna either ascend or experience a fate worse than death

-also the pearl experience left a permanent scar for Spears because why not

-Rivulet.. the funny fishie.... i made almost zero changes to my orevious design of them because it is perfect. just added like some extra gills. theye very short and have little ears because little ears probably help with swimming and stuff to be like aerodynamic. they also have those little flaps on their side like nudibranches!! lil reference to sea slugs :)

-Saint takes inspiration from lynxes (ears) and sea bunnies (the spots!!). Saint is also the oldest slugcat here. i made their forehead dots eyes because that is COOL !!!! i love extra eyes. also chest floof :)

-Survivor and Monks parents had to take care of THREE pups ON THEIR OWN WITHOUT A COLONY TO SUPPORT THEM and they have zero special abilities to their name unlike Arti or Gourmand. theyre gonna be a little scuffed up

-Arti's pups are a mix between a carnivorous slugcat (Arti) and a regular slugcat (whoever Arti had kids with). the blue pup has a diet like Gourmands, where it can eat meat but it wont get as much out of it as a carnivorous slugcat. the green pup has the typical Slugcat diet.

i'll update this if i think of anything else to add!!!

[torialefay]

Hello! I just found your blog and I'm obsessed okay? I love the combo of Kpop and Astrology and you do such a good job at it I HAD to follow instantly 🤍 I was wondering if I could have a natal chart compatibility reading? You can write which member is best suited to me (And maybe for fun briefly mention who I should stay tf away from haha 😂) My pronouns are She/Her! Thank you so much 💋

hi baby! tysm for being patient with me <3 here you gooooo!

so for most compatible, i was really struggling to choose between felix and chan. han wasn't a bad option either. but if i had to pick just ONE, i'm sticking with felix for now. but just know any of the 3 i think would be perfectly suitable. if you want me to elaborate on the other 2 a little just lmk <3

and fun fact: your sun, mercury, venus, and mars are all the same as changbin (which COULD also lead to a good relationship, but with your placements in particular i think it'd lead to more bestie vibes than anything... bc if one of yall is delusional, then so is the other one and there's no one there to pull you out of the trenches lol.)

your ascendant in taurus:

soooo i may be partial, but i really think there is such a great aura that comes with having ascendant in taurus. taurus is such a beautiful, grounding sign that also has that element of divine femininity to it from its venus ruler. it's likely that you come across as having a loving, beautiful personality & also that you have your shit together lol. as far as looks, if you are playing into your rising (which i would encourage), i'd venture to guess that you'd look & feel best in beutiful, elevated styles. this could be anywhere from super girly pink or femme fatale, but embracing that feminine energy is gonna be key. if you hone in on that, it definitely pushes you forward in a captivating way!

for skz, i think it'd be hard for any of them to be uninterested tbh. felix is a pretty ethereal guy. he just naturally draws beauty toward him. i think he'd be really intrigued by you initially and that you'd potentially really catch his eye. especially with that lovey nature taurus risings can have- making you feel super special and seen... lixie would dig it im sure.

your sun in leo:

you are definitely an encourager & able to see what people's strong suits are. felix can get a bit unsure of himself at times and i think you'd be really good at helping him work through that. his "serving" virgo energy makes me think that he'd really really want to give you anything you wanted & he'd probably like it if you were more so in the spotlight than him.

your moon in aries:

same as felix! i love a moon matchup & think it's absolutely one of the most crucial points for predicting long term compatibility. with this placement, you probably have a deep, burning desire to find passion throughout life. whether that's in a person, in art and music, in your work or service to others, in connection with your spirit, etc etc. basically, you are hungry to have purpose and fulfill it. that's not a quality that just anyone can handle. but felix does so perfectly bc he feels the exact same. you'd definitely make the most of life together :)

your mercury in cancer:

oh so you feeeeel feel? you're likely also somewhat expressive of these emotions (whether that's through verbal, through art, through mannerisms, etc). in that case, you're super in luck bc so is lixie. you both deeply understand emotions and the beauty within them. felix's libra here is a great sign to help with re-assurance for you, should you ever need it. it'd also allow for some super heart-felt convos that make your connection deeper than what others have.

your venus in virgo:

your venus tells me you're usually more attracted to super hard-working and driven individuals. people who may come across as a more "dominant" person, while still being super charming and kind. this was a part of the reason why i was having a tough time not picking chan (bc he is a virgo venus' dream ofc), BUT i think once we get past the surface, lix would be the better choice! felix can actually have a more dominant personality at times, which usually isn't seen on camera due to his dynamic within the group itself. but he definitely know how to get shit done. his venus is in libra, which means he's gonna please the shit out of you. would he have the upper hand in the bedroom? for sure. but is he not gonna do a damn thing unless you say you want it? absolutely. you could have that man on a leash making him whatever tf you want lol (sorry lixie)

your mars in scorp:

y'all are definitely gonna have some fun times & actually probably both be borderline obsessed with each other at times. i think fights would get really messy between you two and def would involve some psychological warfare. i think it'd actually take a while to work through fights too. but the other placements make up for it.

who to stay away from?

simplest answer: lee know. now i'm not saying y'all would hate each other for REAL, but i could definitely see a "love to hate" relationship here... and y'all getting on each other's nerves BAD 😂

[miceysfandomcreations]

CSM SPOILER HCS BELOW

@phen0l, @lela-ri @brujaovermoxy Here are some Gun Dad headcanons I didn't have time to draw. Some angsty, some crack-y, some funny, all of a wide range of quality and seriousness. 791 words.

"I'm sorry."

"What?"

"This was meant to be Hayakawa's, not mine."

Do you ever wonder if Gun Fiend has such a raging breeding kink because he wants you to still have some form of Aki? I think I sent an ask about this, but it's technically still Aki's body/genes. So when Gun Child shows signs of not being a normal human, Gun Fiend gets reminded that oh, wait, Aki's gone, that's not Aki's child, all that's left is this meatsuit and its leftover impulses

Anyway, angst over! Here's some other headcanons!

Aki's dad instincts are strong and carry over. Gun Fiend has had Gun Child for a few minutes and already, if something happened to her, he would kill everyone responsible and then himself

He's kind of a helicopter parent, tbh. It's to compensate for the lack of interaction he gets to have with her outside the house/apartment

She cries? Fusses? Blinks? Gun Fiend's rushing to her no matter what

Gun Child calms down whenever she smells gunpowder. The association continues for the rest of her life

Picture this: Gun Child's super sick as an infant once, and you don't know what to do. You wake up one day and find Gun Fiend feeding her blood from his wrist, and she gets better

You start sneaking blood packets from the Safety Bureau from that point forwards. Partly in case of an emergency, partly because Gun Fiend thinks blood can replace food/milk, and tries to supply it from his body

Gun Fiend's the type to look at Gun Child for hours when she's a baby. He'd do the parent thing where you'd make faces and watch the infant copy them. That never gets old for him

Picture them drinking blood from the same packet with curly straws together. Just think of it. Gun Fiend acts greedy but always lets Gun Child have most of it

Gun Fiend probably can't be seen in public with Gun Child. Or be seen in public sans patrolling/missions at all. And because he has developed a modicum of self-control after all this time with you, he stays indoors. He knows bad things will happen if he disobeys yet again.

On the chance your it-was-from-a-one-night-stand-and-I-have-a-type excuse works out with the Bureau, the Bureau wants to maintain the illusion of caring for their workers. On paper, Gun Fiend stays locked up in a room at your place and is kept far away from any children or the unsuspecting public. This kinda sucks when Gun Child gets older and wants to go outside with her dad but can't. Sometimes Gun Fiend picks Gun Child up and they just stare out the window

Side Note: Gun Fiend probably gets humbler over the years. He's still one of the most powerful fiends (probably one of the reasons why so many turn a blind eye to your guys' relationship). But maybe at some point, he gets in a fight with Kishibe, or another powerful devil, and gets wrecked. Maybe he makes connections or even friends in the Bureau and loses them as fast as the OG Aki. He may be the Gun Fiend, but he's not invincible

Out of the house and in school, this is a single-parent household. Gun Child says her dad died in a devil attack, and most people leave it at that. When people press further she gets into the habit of making up a ton of gorey details about his death

"He was squashed by the Donut Devil, only, he didn't realize he got squashed until he returned home and his head fell off right in front of us."

I'm torn on if Gun Fiend wants to give Gun Child siblings. Maybe all his energy goes into doting on Gun Child. Maybe he gets lonely as Gun Child grows up and finds friends outside the home. But the moment Gun Child mentions she wants sibings, or is just lonely, Gun Fiend leaps into action

Maybe carrying a half-fiend child kinda messed up your reproductive system. Maybe it did the opposite. Maybe you make a habit of downing Plan B like vodka shots after Gun Child's birth, even if you already have some form of birth control.

Repeat nightmares of giving birth to a Glock with eyes will haunt you forever

Gun Child shows powers at birth or close to it, or perhaps she develops them during puberty. Whichever way it's tough for everyone involved

Gun Fiend tries to help, but having two bullet-shooting superhumans tends to draw complaints from the neighbors

Depending on her age, you two may try to pass Gun Child off as a weapons hybrid to the Bureau, so she can receive proper training

And thus, a whole new adventure begins

[ckingsbridge]

Coastal Magic Convention Report (1/?)

I’ve received a few asks about how the Coastal Magic Convention went (it was February 20-23 in Daytona Beach). In a word: AWESOME! But for those interested in a more coherent account, I thought I’d write up a full report on my experience. 

It turns out that I have a lot more to say than I’d realized, so I’m going to break this up into a few daily chunks, or it’ll never get finished! Here’s what I’ve got for today:

As many of you know, I’m extremely introverted, and I also tend to have a lot of social anxiety, especially in unfamiliar situations. (Shocking qualities in an author, I know. LOL!) My social skills have vastly improved since childhood, and at this point in my life, I can usually “fake it ‘til I make it” in social situations without problems. But this was also my first convention ever, so I was very, very nervous going in.

Fortunately, during a Skype chat back in October, I’d had the opportunity to meet Jennifer and Dolorianne (the con’s organizers), as well as four readers planning to attend the con. One of those readers - the indescribably wonderful Tina - ended up being the first person I ran into when I stopped by the registration desk on Thursday. She immediately welcomed me with open arms and made me feel so much more at ease. I can’t thank her enough!

That night was a Roaring 20’s-themed welcome mingle. Now, one of the best things about Coastal Magic is that so many of the authors and readers enjoy it so much that they come back year after year. But when you’re the proverbial new kid in school, walking into a huge room full of people who all seem to know each other when you know almost nobody is a straight-up nightmare.

I was kind of hovering awkwardly on the side of the room, pretending I wasn’t totally uncomfortable (you know the move), when I met author Cynthia D’Alba. I don’t know if she realized how uncomfortable I felt or if she was just being naturally friendly, but she invited me to sit at her table and chat. As someone who vastly prefers to listen rather than talk myself, I always appreciate the company of a talkative person, and Cynthia is definitely that! She’s also an experienced convention-goer, so she shared some words of wisdom with me. But what I’m most grateful for is that she rescued me from having to wander the room like the new kid searching for a place to sit in the cafeteria.

The most fun part of the night was when Jennifer brought in a pair of professional dancers from a local dance school. They performed a 20’s-era dance, then invited people up to learn some moves themselves. IMO, doing something active is the best kind of icebreaker - and I also just love to dance, so I jumped right in.

It was super fun - lots of silliness and giggling! There was some shuffling of partners over time, as some people got tired, and I ended up dancing with a woman named Stephanie. It wasn’t until after the dancing exhibition was over that I realized this was the same Stephanie who’d pre-ordered all 6 of my books to pick up at the con’s signing! We hit it off, I chatted with her and her friend Amanda for the rest of the mingle, and we ended up hanging out quite a bit over the course of the weekend.

Panels started on Friday morning. My first one was about the roles of female characters in books with two male leads. This panel topic was actually inspired by that Skype chat in October - it came up during my conversation with the readers, and Jennifer and Dolorianne and I discussed it further afterward. You all know this is a topic near and dear to my heart, and I had a lot to say on the subject. LOL!

We had a great moderator, and my fellow panelists were awesome. They included author Bru Baker, with whom I discovered I had in much in common (including our authorial roots in the Harry Potter fandom). I was pleasantly surprised by how much fun all of the panels were throughout the weekend: a lot of humor and plenty of laugh-out-loud moments mixed in with some great insights. And the readers - again, during all of the con’s panels - were so engaged and asked awesome questions.

After the panel, several people made a point of coming up to tell me that they would never have known it was my first convention if I hadn’t said so. That meant a lot to me, because I was still SO FRICKING NERVOUS. The last time I was this nervous was when I officiated my sister’s wedding! This panel was also when I got to meet my reader Sue, who is an absolutely lovely person and had the kindest things to say. <3

Lunch was an authors-only pizza party, and after that, I got a sweet tooth craving. I headed down to the hotel’s coffee shop - and who should I run into outside, but a table full of all the people I knew best at the convention? I grabbed a Danish from the shop and joined them. Let me just say, it’s incredible (and unprecedented!) how quickly I felt comfortable and welcomed within this group of women. During this conversation, Dolorianne also gave me some great advice on how to decide on which writing project to focus on next.

My afternoon panel was, ironically, called “The Killing Game”. (Pure coincidence!) As you might guess, it was about all of the fun ways to kill off characters. I finally got to meet Jay from the Joyfully Jay blog in person, as she was the moderator, and afterward I met Jeff from the Big Gay Fiction Podcast as well. This may have been my favorite panel of the entire weekend, for the pure mischief of it all!

I had a nice long break for the rest of my afternoon/early evening. Now, one thing you probably don’t know about me is how much I love makeup. Playing and experimenting with makeup is one of my favorite things, and I own so much makeup paraphernalia that I have to pack my actual products in two different travel bags, and then all of my makeup brushes in their own separate third bag.

So you can imagine my reaction when I opened my suitcase upon arriving at the hotel on Thursday and discovered that I had forgotten my bag of makeup brushes at home. *headdesk*

Luckily, I’d brought several differently-sized makeup sponges with me in a different bag (I’m not exaggerating about how much I love makeup), which served in a pinch. But sponges aren’t ideal for eye makeup in particular, so I decided to use my long Friday afternoon break to walk the half-mile to the Walgreens down the street from the hotel and pick up some cheap brushes to tide me over.

No big deal, because I much prefer walking to driving - I constantly miss the days of living in Pittsburgh, when I could easily walk to the corner store, the supermarket, even work. Half a mile is just about the perfect distance for a short walk if you happen to be healthy and able-bodied, and it was also nice and cool outside, since February is one of Florida’s few bearable months.

What I wasn’t expecting was the 25-30 mph winds!

I’m not kidding. The Hilton in Daytona is right on the beach, so walking down the sidewalk outside the hotel meant there was only one layer of buildings between me and these enormous gusts of wind coming straight off the Atlantic Ocean. They were so intense that at times I had to stop walking, plant my feet, and brace myself against getting blown off the sidewalk into oncoming traffic! It was insane, although it did lend a sense of adventure to an otherwise mundane walk.

Anyway, I made it to Walgreens alive and bought a bunch of Wet & Wild makeup brushes for like $1.50 each (they’re barely any different from much more expensive brushes, tbh). Then it was back to the hotel for some downtime while getting ready for… the Jazz Age Murder Mystery Party!

Part 2

[almaasi]

reaction post typed while watching Good Omens (ALL OF IT)

my favourite novel is now my favourite mini-series and IT’S SO BEAUTIFUL

under the cut: a very long, spoilery six-episode reaction to MY NEW FAVOURITE THING EVER

--

may 31st 07:36pm nz

i posted my episode 1 reaction a couple hours ago but that got ZERO NOTES so i assume people are either avoiding spoilers or aren’t interested, which is fine, but i’m just gonna put all my reactions in one big post so anyone who IS interested doesn’t have to read 6 separate posts c:

edit june 1st 04:08am: btw i watched using a free trial on amazon prime, which i’m pretty sure is worldwide. soooo if yOU WANT TO WATCH THIS, YOU CAN, FOR FREE

--

EPISODE 1: In the Beginning

--

04:03pm

idk how much i’m gonna type, whether i’ll post a reaction to the entire thing in one post....... or how much i’ll end up watching right now

kinda want to spread it out and save it as a treat for after i’ve done some writing

but right now i wanna watch before writing

so maybe i’ll do one ep, write something, then return to this?

edit: aahhaha that didn’t happen

-

04:04pm

I’M SO EXCITED

I’VE BEEN WAITING SO LONG

well... since 2011 when i first read the book

but regardless it’S BEEN 84 YEARS

-

04:05

okay first off i did not know amazon prime did adverts at the start of their videos. so i was like SINCE WHEN WAS CHILDISH GAMBINO/DONALD GLOVER IN GOOD OMENS

and then

yeah

no

either way i thought it was a good opening

-

W A R

NING

cool cool cool cool cool

-

omg i’m used to where the netflix full-screen button is, and on amazon prime that’s the “next episode” button so i gotta be real careful

-

dear god my video quality is TERRIBLE

i.......... i might torrent this show and watch it offline

this is horrendous i can’t see a damn thing

i have never seen pixels this big

-

04:11

okay the quality calmed down after a minute

i loooove the intro, i love that it’s basically word for word from the book

i feel like i’d find it funnier if i hadn’t read the book 3 months ago

-

also? god is a woman? yes

-

04:13

is it just me or does the snek have a slightly david tennant-esque quality about it

-

i’m so happy adam and eve are black

-

04:17

omfg. aziraphale said “ineffable” and now CRAWLEY’S CHECKING HIM OUT TRYING TO SEE IF HE HAS ANY JUNK

WOW

...or y’know, looking for a flaming sword. SAME FUCKING THING.

-

also i looove how FLUFFY azi is

-

azi: “do hope i didn’t do the wrong thing”

i fucking love them both uhrgughhhuhuhughuhhh

-

04:21

small sob for cuteness

umbella wings

-

04:23

in the opening titles, crowley just stopped a spaceship and aziraphale turned it into fish

i feel like that was a douglas adams reference and i’m on board

-

04:25

the entire time i read the book, up until i saw video promos of this show, i thought “crowley” was said the same way as spn’s “crowley”, as in “crahwlee”

not “crOhwlee”

i definitely like that they’re different though

both probably named after aleister crowley tbh. all of whom are queer.

-

THOSE SWAYING HIPS

i haven’t found david tennant attractive in about 9 years but WHOOOP HELLO AGAIN

somehow attractive for entirely different reasons than before. like. my taste changed but tHEN

-

i’m on crowley’s side, taking down a cellphone network is VERY ANNOYING

-

04:35

crowley: shitshitshitshithsit

:D

i can’t wait for aziraphale’s big swear

-

04:37

i miss eating sushi

sushi was great

-

04:43

this baby delivery thing is sTRESSFUL

“aaaaurthurrrrr”

nooo

poor lady

-

04:45

“little toesie woesies”

where’s the sister mary loquacious fan club and where do i sign up

-

i’m glad they colour-coded the babies and did the playing card explanation because this part of the book always tied my brain in knots

-

05:00

this is reminding me how utterly gross england is

-

“MY POINT IS............. DOLPHINS”

YES

-

05:06

see in the book

i never once realised that the nanny was crowley in disguise

-

05:11

digging the snake tattoo sideburns

-

05:14

and yeah the short hair looks good

-

05:15

fINALLY crowley called azi “angel”

-

05:17

crowley: “oh no no don’t do your magic act, pleeease”

the magic act scene is one of my fave parts of the book <3

-

05:20

aw man they cut out the best part

i mean i get why

the kids shouted a bunch of gay slurs at aziraphale

and there were no secret service people with guns

but aw mannn

AND THEY CUT OUT THE BIT WITH THE DEAD DOVE AND CROWLEY BRINGS IT BACK TO LIFE FOR AZIRAPHALE

THAT WAS MY SINGLE FAVOURITE BIT OF THE BOOK

AND IT’S GONE

;C

-

OH WAIT

THERE’S THE DOVE

OH GOOD

-

aw man aziraphhale just brought it back himself

i liked it better in the book

they sat on the steps outside and crowley comforted azi and took the dove and fixed it for him, and then it flew off

idk i just had such a perfect image of that moment in my mind and this was..... good but not the same at all

could be gayer

-

05:27

good dog

-

05:28

crowley: *snifsnif* something’s changed

aziraphale: “oh it’s a new cologne, my barber suggeste--”

crowley: “no no i know what you smell like”

gayyyyyyyyyy <3

-

05:31

okay that’s ep 1 watched!!! i’ll watch more maybe later tonight :D

ENJOYING THIS SO FAR

not as gay as expected ........YET

needs 400% more “angel” and “dear”

--

EPISODE 2: The Book

07:42pm

pillar of salt guy: “something smells evil”

the fact crowley smells evil and yet aziraphale likes his company regardless says a lot

-

07:49

fully expected crowley to say “i didn’t fall, i sauntered vaguely downwards”

-

07:50

iiiii’m finding the narrator a little annoying

maybe it’s because i read the book so i know what’s going on

but saying “he has four items to deliver in his van. he works for this postage company and he’s making his first delivery in a formal warzone”.... idk i feel like all of those things could be shown visually? saying it rather than showing it probably saved seven seconds of airtime, but damn

-

07:56

i wonder if the narrator was a later addition to this, for new audience clarity? the script for god just seems a little stilted, idk

edit: i kind of got used to it, but it was still jarring, which i’m sure was the opposite of the intended effect

-

08:09

the saddest newt

-

08:13

she’s kind of exactly how i imagined her in the book

and definitely my fave next to aziraphale and crowley

-

08:17

i feel so bad for crowley’s plants

poor babies

-

08:19

for some reason i imagined her as a redhead. kind of more like mrs weasley

-

08:33

these wee children......... so soft.......... so smol

-

08:25

v happy with the casting for pepper

tiny downside is that we lose another redhead

-

08:29

i find the kids’ conversations hilarious because they’re the same age as harry potter when he goes to hogwarts the first time

idk if this is what eleven year olds are like in real life, but when i read the book i did feel distinctly like they spoke like eight year olds

-

08:35

crowley: “i like spooky. big spooky fan, me”

he just sounds like the tenth doctor

-

08:36

YEEE FINALLY CROWLeY DOING NICE THINGS FOR AZIRAPHALE

-

08:48

"you know, crowley, i’ve always said that deep down you really are a--”

“SHUT IT”

DON’T YOU CALL HIM NICE YOU PRETTY BASTARD

-

loquacious: “sorry to break up an intimate moment”

-

08:45

i imagined anathema’s tripod thing to be about 5 feet tall, not a cute little knee-high thing

-

08:48

freddie mercury: BIIIII CYCLE

BIIIIIIII CYCLE

yeah i was waiting for that

-

crowley: “get in, angel”

HE MURMURED

DON’T MURMUR YOUR TERMS OF ENDEARMENT noo

-

09:00

end of episode 2!!! i freaking loved aziraphale vs the book <3

-

the credits for this ep credit konnie huq as someone named pam but idk who that is? i had a crush on konnie huq as a kid when she was a presenter on “blue peter”

OH WAIT RIGHT the lady on the breakfast show on crowley’s tv. aw such a small part. hoping we’ll see her again later

edit: nope. might rewatch that part to pay more attention. obviously i didn’t even recognise her after like.. 15 years

--

EPISODE 3: Hard Times

09:05pm

brb gotta get some food

-

09:14

and now i wait for food

EPISODE THREE LET’S GO

is this the one that’s just crowley and azi’s backstory?

-

09:16

i can’t even put my finger on why but he’s getting more attractive

-

09:21

ah yes

aziraphale is eating shellfish and trying to tempt crowley

“oh... that’s your job”

i love this part of their dynamic

-

09:29

i adore when crowley makes aziraphale smile <3

-

09:43

SAUNTERED VAGUELY DOWNWARDS

YEE

-

i like seeing how crowley’s sunglasses differ throughout history

-

09:36

“if they knew i’d been... fraternising”

this is such a forbidden romance i love ittttt

-

09:49

CROWLEY SAVED THE BOOKS

and SOFT VIOLIN PLAYS

THIS IS A FUCKING LOVE STORY

k this is my favourite part of the show so far <3

-

09:50

this angel just fell in love

right in that moment

i see cartoon hearts around him

-

09:54

just had to pause for a second bc there was some broccoli in my tea :c

-

09:56

awwwwwwwwwwwwww 

he got him holy waterrrrrrr

-

UNIVERSAL ANGLE OF HETEROSEXUAL LONGING

-

definitely feeling a lot of “NOW KISS” right about now

-

09:59

LAUGHING BECAUSE THE OPENING CREDITS ARE LITERALLY HALFWAY INTO THE EPISODE

-

10:03

throughout the entire book azi just came across as the kind of person who wore glasses even though glasses were never once mentioned

I AM GLAD TO SEE GLASSES

-

10:12

i like this colour palette and the gold in their makeup

-

10:27

“we can go off together”

omg the world’s ending and crowley’s all RUN AWAY WITH MEEE

-

10:31

okay then

good eyelashes

edit: i also like how their relationship was explained with a simple tap on the wrist: hurry up, you’re on the clock, i’m a sex worker, finish your call because i’m leaving

-

10:32

episode three DONE

these eps don’t feel long enough

maybe that means the pacing is just right? who knows

i feel like i should be doing something other than watching this but..... why

--

EPISODE 4: Saturday Morning Funtime

10:48pm

aziraphale is SOFT and he’s perfect like that <3

fuck u gabriel and your body shaming

-

10:53

i want delivery guy to be okay BUT I READ THE BOOK

so............... i know he will be...... eventually

-

10:55

how did they get photographs taken in the 1600s

-

oh gabriel’s eyes ARE purple, i thought i was seeing them wrong

-

11:02

“maud i love you”

noo ho hoooo

-

11:09

a little douglas adams, definitely

BUT NO PEPPER POT DALEK

AWW

-

11:10

the season is very much jumping between summer and autumn

though i suppose that’s the point, tadfield is just perfect

-

11:12

“which the internet has begun to refer to as the kracken”

i wonder if good omens inadvertently inspired me to write The Wireless a couple of years back. wouldn’t be surprising

edit: no, couldn’t have, because the internet wasn’t much of a thing (or a thing at all?) in the book, given its publish date

-

11:20

that’s a v nice dress/top combo

gosh she’s so pretty

-

11:30

crowley: “we can run away together!!! alpha centauri!!!”

aw baby

-

crowley: “i’m going home, angel! i’m getting my stuff, and i am leaving. and when i am up in the stars, i won’t even think about you!!”

THAT WAS A V SAD BREAKUP NOOOOO

why has there not been a single “dear” yet :c

-

11:37

oh no, this part

i loved this in the book but i am NOT READY for maggots

damn you gaiman

-

11:39

he’s so cute

and so gay

-

11:42

uriel: “don’t think your boyfriend in the dark glasses will get you special treatment in hell”

he looks kinda delighted uriel called crowley his boyfriend

i would say he looks worried but this shot was used without context in the trailer and it came across as genuine joy, i actually thought he was looking at crowley

-

11:46

i thought it was a strange throne before

a spider at the centre of a web

dark halo

yeah

-

11:51

oh now she’s a redhead???

-

also i’m glad they implied newt and anathema just kissed because the sex thing was weird in the book

-

okay never mind

hmm

-

12:05

aziraphale: “oh.................ffffUCK.”

YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAH

-

12:07

oh no

it’s happening

oh no

i hate this part but i love what happens because of it

-

12:29am

i have eaten and now i have tea and i am back from MORE BOOKSHOP FIRE

-

EPISODE 5: The Doomsday Option

12:31

nuuuuuuuuuu

and “you’re my best friend” playing while crowley’s tryna call azi

nuuuuuu

-

“somebody killed my best friend”

jfhsdfjsdj

/sobs

-

12:36

freddie mercury: “somebody find me somebody tooo ooo looove”

edit: the narration WRECKED this. it was so dramatic and visually emotional but the voiceover completely screwed with it and it was SO UNNECESSARY.

-

12:46

crowley: “i lost my best friend”

he says, while crying, while talking to that friend

-

THE ONE BOOK HE WANTS IS THE ONE CROWLEY SAVED

THEY’RE SO FUCKING BEAUTIFUL TOGETHER

-

azi wanted to share crowley’s body

and then said they had to get a wiggle on

-

12:52

they cut out the hell’s angels / lesser horsemen

i figured they would, but still a shame

-

1:54

in the book tracy’s “spirit guide” was native american but daaaaaamn that part really needed to go

now she’s irish which is... better, probably

-

01:01

ron: “SHUT. UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUP”

this guy’s having the time of his life

-

01:03

he wave

-

01:05

1926 bentley; sexiest car right next to the ‘67 chevy impala

-

01:08

omg gotta translate and explain the road

-

01:13

OH NO the maggots are about to happen

they changed the placement of this but it worked for the pacing

-

OH NO

-

k well the maggots were gross but not as bad as i imagined

-

01:31

omg the dog turned upside down rather than be picked up

i wonder if that was intentional

dog: I DO NOT WANT UP

-

01:34

pfff he’s reading “american gods” by neil gaiman

-

01:44am

10/10 flaming car

-

EPISODE 6: The Very Last Day of the Rest of Their Lives

01:51am

here we go...

-

01:55

azi so happy that crowley said the dress suits him <3

-

01:57

rip bentley

-

01:59

aziraphale: “we are here to lick some serious butt!!”

crowley: “kick!! kick, aziraphale, for heaven’s sake”

-

02:06

i freaking love the parallel between the Them and the horsemen in the book

and i love that they did face shots to show the parallel

pepper = war

wensleydale = famine

brian = pollution

adam = death

the parallel is less clear for brian and wensleydale, at least in the show. was more obvious in the book. but at the same time i kind of got confused between them a lot, brian was always eating, but wensleydale was named after cheese

-

02:14

pepper: “i do not endorse everyday sexism”

/STOMPS ON WAR’S FOOT

YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH

-

02:25

shadwell: “anyone who wants ta get ta the hoore of babylon will have to get past me”

earlier anathema said “boyfriend”

may i point out that all the adults are paired up

shadwell & madame tracy

newt & anathema

......and....

aziraphale and crowley

-

0:28

crowley: “we are FUCKED”

these two need a holiday

-

azi: “come up with something... or.... or i’ll never talk to you again”

he knows crowley loves him aww

perfect blackmail material

-

02:32

they went from trying to kill him to being his gay angel parents real quick

-

02:35

thought they were holding hands for a second there

edit: regardless, a whole damn airfield and they’re 2cm apart

-

02:39

happy ending for the postman, hooray~

-

crowley about the bookshop, softly: “it burned down. remember? you can stay at my place”

awwWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

-

02:42

CROWLEY GOT HIS CAR BACK AND YET HE TOOK A TAXI

-

02:45

anathema: “why is your car called dick turpin?”

newt: “dick turpin is a famous highwayman. it’s called dick turpin because everywhere it goes, it holds up traffic”

i laughed

this wasn’t in the book and i always wondered

-

02:51

i wonder if holy water wouldn’t burn him because he’s too good

-

03:00

gabriel: “don’t talk to me about the greater good, sunshine, i’m the angel fucking gabriel”

really enjoying these swears

-

03:03

i thought so

-

03:30am

paused for a bit to get ready for bed

i thought it was after 4am but nope

-

“there would be other summers, but not one like this. not ever again”

that genuinely makes me emotional

i think that’s why it’s my favourite book, i can relive that summer with them

-

03:35

omg

-

OH MY GOD

WAIT

THEY

OH MY GOD

THEY WEREN’T IMMUNE, THEY JUST SWAPPED PLACES

HOLY SHIT

edit: THIS WAS NOT IN THE BOOK AND IT’S BRILLIANT AND I’M GLAD IT’S HERE

-

crowley: “let me tempt you to a spot of lunch?

azi: “~temptation accomplished~!”

THEY’RE SO STINKING CUTE

-

“just enough of a bastard to be worth knowing”

perfect

STILL NO USE OF “DEAR” THOUGH AND IT’S KILLING ME

-

that ending with the bird made me teary-eyed

-

credits: BENEDICT CUMBERBATCH AS SATAN

WOW

OKAY

AKSFJDSF /snorts

-

the end credits and the song i just wanna bawl my eyes out

i loved this so much and i’m so glad it was GOOD

i loved that they added so many people of colour. in the book i imagined crowley played by alexander siddig (star trek: deep space 9 era) but i guess david tennant makes a pretty good crowley too

i’m trying not to be upset that my favourite scene with the dove and aziraphale’s affectionate use of “dear” was taken out

but 

this was damn good regardless. even gayer in places than in the book

-

this nightingale song is my new favourite song

i never got the reference before

“and as we kissed and said goodnight, an nightingale sang in berkeley square:

GAY

SO GAY

i love

-

the end of the credits “For Terry”

ACTUAL OUT LOUD SOBBING

TERRY YOU WOULD’VE LOVED THIS

NEIL DID YOU PROUD

-

oh this was so beautiful

i’m gonna watch it again with my family probably within the week. i’m so emotionally tender now

azIRAPHALE WAS SO FLUFFY AND CROWLEY WAS SO NICE ABOUT THE BOOKS

ugh i love them more than ever

anathema...... i don’t know if i relate to her, want to be her, look up to her, want her to mentor me, live with her, or find her attractive. maybe all of the above. but she was freaking PERFECT. PE R F E CT 

the casting was so... just right. thank you casting people for anathema.

like... i also didn’t mind the newt/anathema thing so much now. it was hard to tell in the book how much of a relationship they had after, but that smile she gave while lying in bed the morning after, that worked, it said a lot. and i like that it was her choice to burn the prophecy sequel rather than newt’s suggestion

gabriel was amusing. like.. i’m glad he wasn’t in the book. but he was great here. also really like michael and uriel. uriel was so damn beautiful.

i also would really have liked to see a mention of the fact crowley and aziraphale are both agender and potentially asexual. not even a hint of it here. buuuuuut it guess i know from the book. so.

my favourite episode was of course episode 3 with crowley and aziraphale’s 6000 year backstory. especially the 1940s bit where crowley saved the books <3

this show was was less confusing than the book too. ugh it was done so well

OH

we didn’t see where the soldier guy went when aziraphale zapped him away!!! in the book he reappeared safely back home and went out to see his family. to be fair i don’t know whether he died and went to heaven, but it was a nice thing to happen

and they took out the Them’s bully/rival gang, who was led by the third baby from the baby swap, and who won awards for his tropical fish. at least that’s what i remember. which meant the parallel about heaven/hell being rival gangs was lost here. but the parallel between the horsemen and the them was stronger than ever and i loved that.

look, i mean, 10 out of 10, EASY.

favourite thing? yes. yes, absolutely.

--

shoutout to the one time i wrote a Good Omens/Destiel crossover fic The Angel Cake Challenge

IT’S 04:02am THIS TOOK ME 12 HOURS

04:40am AND FORTY MINUTES TO EDIT

congrats if you made it to the end of this!!! thank you for reading <3 AND GO WATCH THE SHOW IF YOU HAVEN’T ALREADY

[actuallylorelaigilmore]

Please tell me more about Autistic Syd, I thought I was the only one who had this head canon, I just can't place why I do

Hi!! I need to make more Syd gifs but for now, this one works for everything Syd related tbh because I love it.

Okay, I guess this is my excuse to finally write a meta for Syd. :) First off, all of this rambling about my headcanons for them has to come with the giant warning that because we don’t have a ton of information about Syd except through their relationship with Elena, I’m well aware that this is conjecture and hunches and I can’t always point to specific aha! evidence as to why I interpret them the way I do. In some cases it really is as simple and as complicated as ‘I’m on the spectrum and this thing feels like me, ergo Syd seems Autistic too but you won’t exactly find the thing in the diagnostic criteria.’

Okay, so what do we know about Syd? They’re big into social justice, nerdy fandom, and Elena. They’re also not super good at reading nuanced or complicated social cues, a potential Autistic clue. A lot of what we see between them and Elena when conflict arises is that they either expect Elena to know what they mean even when they’re not expressing it very clearly (Benihana’s), or they misunderstand Elena’s behavior and from it draw the wrong conclusion (the cookie, the lockdown). Now, granted, miscommunication happens to neurotypical people too…but it’s definitely an Autistic flag for me, especially when you can see it in Syd compared to Elena, who is also a social justice and fandom nerd, but who trips herself up in other ways (usually anxiety and inexperience).

What about social norms more broadly? We know that Syd is homeschooled, though we don’t know why. It could be their parents’ choice for all kinds of reasons, or it could have been decided that homeschooling would be the best way to educate Syd and/or their brother for reasons having to do with the kids. We don’t know, because we know nothing really about their home life. Either way, Syd is a loveable weirdo but capable of getting along with others, including new people. They may approach socializing in an unconventional way (see Alex and the zombie video), but they clearly make online friends well enough and seem fairly comfortable among groups of people (like Elena’s family).

It’s impossible to tell whether their quirkiness makes homeschooling a good fit for them, or if being homeschooled helped make them quirky. But I’m not willing to rule out the possibility that Syd’s parents chose homeschooling to support their Autistic needs and sensitivities while they were growing up. The reality is, older Autistic kids aren’t always the media cliches you see of people who rock in a corner and don’t respond to others. Everyone’s different, and a lot of us develop strategies to pass as somewhat neurotypical, or as close as we can manage…and especially those of us assigned female at birth (which it seems like Syd was) who are less commonly diagnosed than Autistic boys, we can get really good at it. I spent my entire school career being considered a freak–overenthusiastic, incapable of controlling my emotions and thoughts, different from everyone else in a thousand tiny ways that nobody could have pinpointed but everybody recognized–but nobody ever thought I might be developmentally disabled. I navigated things well enough that I was just ��weird.’ With a caring and supportive home environment that also doubled as school, Syd might have reached the same place by the time they were sixteen.

Also, while Syd is comfortable around Elena’s family and in public places like the school dance, they seem pretty introverted too. Faced with a party, they’re more likely to dive into a magazine or escape to the balcony as they are to make small talk. Their interactions with Alex, one-on-one, seem much more comfortable, but that may be because they already have the established common ground of Elena that makes it easier for them to engage in conversation. Introversion also does not automatically equal Autism, but being Autistic can look a lot like introversion, in a social context. I hate small talk and tend to be quiet at parties until I find one person I actually want to talk to, and then I tend to be very animated and never shut up. Sound at all like Syd with Alex, once talking to Elena fizzled out?

Something I’ve found to be true in my own experience is that Autistic people, who have to learn social norms that come easily to other people, are capable of seeing them for the arbitrary boundaries they are. The fact that gender is a social construct is something that’s always made perfect sense to me, because as a society we make all the rules up–and the less sense they make to Autistic people, the more aware of that we are. Breaking them is a choice, rather than some kind of defiance of a perfect higher order. In other words, if Syd is Autistic, that might have helped them become as comfortable as they seem to be in their own skin and identity, accepting their nonbinary nature rather than feeling the need to fight it.

Syd definitely fits the Autistic traits of having specific interests and being logically oriented. They’re not especially rigid or obsessive about them, though, that we see. Their reasons for not telling Elena their sexual history before they’re in the hotel together follows Syd’s own internal logic, whether it makes sense to anyone else or not. And they have some intense interests, that span a range of geeky fandoms. But we don’t see any narrow focus and deep well of knowledge about one area. I certainly know from personal experience that fandom can be a special interest, and if we knew more about Syd outside their relationship with Elena, we might learn that they do have one passion that they’ve spent years fixated on. The big ask shows us that they’re creative in an eccentric, enthusiastic way, which always gets my attention for potential spectrum qualities.

We don’t see any obvious sensory issues with Syd. They don’t show any unusual sensitivities to foods or clothing textures, loud noises, etc. They do have a slightly unusual voice, a little flat in tone with less expressiveness, which can be an Autistic trait.

One other trait that codes Syd as Autistic is their relationship to honesty. Unlike Elena, who sometimes lies, Syd is persistently honest. The traits that make them unusual, even ones that might seem unflattering, they are nothing but upfront about. And they’re trusting, taking others at their word as well. After knowing Elena for months and never once hearing about or meeting any of her friends, they completely believe her lie that she’s popular at school, when other people would have been naturally suspicious. This could be because they are young and in love and want to see the good in the world around them…or it could be because they tell the truth and expect the same from everyone else. When you go from ‘likes to believe that people are honest’ to ‘never even considers the possibility of lying as something people could do,’ that’s a significant spectrum quality.

Now, honestly, based solely on what we see of Syd in canon, are they Autistic? It’s kind of impossible to tell for sure. We just don’t know enough about their home life and how they are when they’re not with Elena, to say with total certainty one way or the other. If they are Autistic, they definitely only display mild traits on the show. No repeating words a lot, stimming, avoiding crowds or small talk, etc. But since every Autistic person is different, and lots of spectrum kids grow up with behavioral therapy support now and learn much better coping mechanisms than I did at Syd’s age, it’s entirely possible they could be Autistic even without showing more intense, ‘classic’ signs in their limited screentime.

So personally, I like my headcanon that Syd may be Autistic. Because whether they are or not, they are definitely a giant, wonderful nerd–and the kind of character I would enjoy sharing a common experience like Autism with, when it’s so often portrayed on TV in ways that are hurtful or unrealistic.

tl;dr Syd definitely has some traits that could be read as Autistic; we don’t see them enough to know for sure; I claim them as one of ours anyway because they’re awesome so I say you can too, if you want :)

[panticwritten]

Unbind Me? (for whoever you want)

OKAY I FINALLY DID IT!! Sorry it took so long, and thank you so much for sending this!

This takes place August 2017. There’s not a lot of context here, but tbh it would take more than 1500 words to give anywhere near enough context to make some things in this make sense.

Content warnings: Unreality, implied memory loss, implied suicidal ideation.

—//—

I know Connor will have a great big I told you so waiting for me when we get back. I told you, he’ll say, that you can’t just ignore trauma. There’ll be a whole thing, and everyone is gonna agree with him even though no one else deals with their bullshit either.

“What’ll you do with him when we get back?” Jarie tugs at the rope between the two of us. She walks a step behind me, but I still feel the pointed look she aims at Jordan.

I tighten my grip on his wrist. Some might say it’s unnecessary, considering he’s also tied to me. I don’t trust him not to use the memories to wiggle away. Not for the reasons the Master thinks, but because of one trait I know he shares with Connor.

He doesn’t think he deserves forgiveness for crimes he never even committed.

“Figure out what’s really going on.”

“We know!” she snaps. “Do you think I’ve been running around with someone else in my head for fun?”

Guilt throbs from Jordan. He doesn’t say anything, still, and I wonder why. I wonder why he doesn’t defend himself, why he doesn’t tell her the truth. Doesn’t tell me the truth. He obviously thinks I think he did this if his insistence he stay out here means anything. 

The lonely boy trapped in the memories, stuck in a hole in the darkness and surrounded by both my nightmares and his own. Jarie led me right to him, only a trace of what really controlled her left in her head by the time I tracked them both down.

Still. There’s something else.

Something, something, something doesn’t taste right around here.

“It’s just like you to stop with the easy answer,” I mutter around the buttery feeling in my mouth. “It’s all horses to you.”

A bolt of confusion lances through her irritation, through her anger. She doesn’t have to ask her question. Not here, not in a place as personal as the memories.

“I’m on a zebra hunt.”

Really, it’s so familiar. I’ve felt this before. The quality of those remnants in Jarie’s head, the vague taste of late nights and this feeling. It’s right on the tip of my tongue. It’s there, and whatever it is makes me much more nervous than the idea that Connor’s missing half might be secretly evil.

“Oh, great.”

The blank slate of the Memories shifts. A baby blue wall slams down in front of us, the floor now a ratty green carpet. The single window only shows inky darkness, no sign of what really would have been outside my room in…

What year would this have been?

I ignore both Jarie’s demand for an explanation and Jordan’s nervous protest when I drop his hand and twist around to assess the room.

Pictures up on the walls, a camping mat instead of a bed. Most of the furniture against the one wall, but that desk… next to the door…

“2013? No, no.” I snap around again, only limited by the rope still tight around my waist. Laptop on the dresser, the old one, the one I kept stealing from the living room. “2012. That summer, the good one.”

Jarie immediately stops her complaining. “That summer? What are we doing in 2012?”

“I was thinking, trying to remember.” I tilt my head and look out the window. Sharp, shifting red and blue. An easy assumption, but it wasn’t a real-life thing. No sirens, nothing out of the ordinary in the real world. “I’m so close, what is that taste?”

“What taste?” Jarie demands. “You’ve been weird since we picked him up.”

“Ugh, shut up!” I groan. “There’s a taste, like—like—“

I stop because we’re not alone in the room anymore. Based on how close Jarie shuffles to me, I’d say she feels it too. The memory itself isn’t tampered with, it’s normal even with the red and the blue that I only really saw through someone else’s eyes.

The lights! That red and blue wasn’t even here, I was trying to do something at—and that taste! It’s like—

“You would expect memories to be different, wouldn’t you?” a voice, a familiar voice, muses. I don’t need to look to see those eyes, for the growl of a smile to sink into my skin and root me to the floor. “But, then, you never go-ot the o-opportunity to really feel it, did you?”

Blank, blank, my brain turns to nothing but faint static and false clarity.

Jarie lunges toward the voice, still behind me. The rope keeps her from actually attacking. That’s good. Even a memory of Tchaikovsky could ruin us if we let it.

Jordan, on the other hand, stumbles in the opposite direction, away from the threat. He ends up where I can see him, red eyes wide and scared and anything but an enemy. He focuses on me, a plea.

It takes the purr of a laugh from behind me to really shake me out of it. It rubs the situation wrong, a thorn in the fabric. It’s just a memory, but this doesn’t fit.

I turn, too stiff, too mechanical. This fear, nothing more than the remnants of a horror movie. The big, bad monster stands in the middle of my old room and I know he can’t do a single thing to hurt me.

The victorious, smug glint is right. The line of the shoulders, the hungry touch in the air. The confidence. All of that’s right. The chuckle fits what I’m being told.

I narrow my eyes. That’s not a memory. That’s something else, and it’s lying to me.

“Jarie.” I flex my hand and curl my fingers around the newly-arrived map back home. She doesn’t answer with more than a frustrated agreement in the air. Good. “I’ll be right behind you.”

“Don’t be so sure.” The specter shifts on its heels, as if it’s going to take a step forward. It laughs again when Jarie skitters back to stand just barely behind me. “Does your brava-ado hide the sa-ame cowardice?”

Jarie growls at my side and snatches the map from me. It takes less than a thought to reconfigure the ropes. I don’t even have to look away from the boogieman. From the fake.

The door slams shut out of sight, Jarie and Jordan both gone.

This is so familiar, why don’t I remember? That affect to its voice, I know I’ve heard it before!

“Tchaikovsky wasn’t here for this.” Might as well start with what I know for sure. Wary, tired, but at least I can keep a lie of control here. “Who are you, really?”

“I tho-ought you knew everything in your Cube.” It sneers and loses the characteristic poise of the face it wears. It does nothing to dispel the tension in the air. “You certainly believed so o-on this day, my fa-avorite interloper.”

Ah.

I shift, and in a blink I have it backed against a wall. I didn’t expect it to back up on its own, though it certainly makes this easier. White hot sparks fizz over the hand I raise toward the throat it stole from a man I’d love nothing more than to wipe from the Cube’s history.

“You,” I growl, my voice strange under the force of electricity I hold. “Don’t belong here.”

It breathes out a nervous laugh, and it really did choose the wrong face if it didn’t want me to be tempted to crush it like the worm it’s masquerading as. It shouldn’t be here, I haven’t even talked to Brennan in at least a year! It can’t be here!

“If you ever ca-ame to visit, you’d know I’ve been here for nearly five years.” It presses back against the wall, its voice strained and seething. “But then, you a-alwa-ays neglect to fo-ollow up o-on your little ga-ames, don’t you?”

It flinches when I raise my hand and a spark lands on its neck. Tchaikovsky’s milky skin fades there, just for a second, into the scratched plastic that it was hiding.

“You disappeared.” I shift just a little bit closer, close enough that I can really see through the illusion. Just a broken mannequin, full of a thing that doesn’t belong anywhere near my head. “I was thirteen. Why would I even think to look for you?”

“I stole ha-alf a-a summer from you!”

Now that I can see both its illusion and the blankness of its true face, it’s both less intimidating and more disconcerting. So close, though, I see something else. Something that speaks volumes more than anything it could say to me.

I step back, though I don’t take the sparks with me. They hang in the air, a simple enough threat, just beside its throat. It doesn’t relax. In fact, that same something only twists and shakes the air around those sparks.

“AA.” I dip into the voice I try to avoid. The voice of a leader, I suppose, or a commander as Jay’s described it. The voice of someone who expects their orders to be followed. I hate it, though it does get the attentiveness from AA that I’m looking for. “Why reveal yourself now?”

It doesn’t answer. I wait longer than I probably should, and I know what I have to do. I’m gonna get hell when I get back. I hate this slimy little monster, but I can’t feel that and see it in the air and still bring everyone the blood they’re going to want.

I’ll already be getting a trial for Jordan. I may as well get one for the thing that I’d be willing to bet is really behind all of this. Especially when I’m almost ninety percent sure it lured me out here just to kill it.

[awaylaughing]

Aaand More Changeling

This is...one 1/4 review and 3/4 impressions and opinions. It’s more non-spoilers but I do get into as much detail as I can so watch out JUST IN CASE. There is a link to a spoiler-y critique though, so don’t click that if you don’t want to see it. Also this is like, 3K long. So it’s loooong and if you are on mobile I am so sorry.

@steamberrystudio tagging you guys since you sorta asked, but like I said it’s long as heck so don’t feel pressured to respond to it any time soon.

OVERALL

MAN I love this game! It has a few flaws here and there (I swear in one route Spencer claims his left eye was blinded but I have...no memory which route that was...either Marc, Danny or Elliot??) but over all it’s well written with amazing sprites (ELLIOT IS SO CUTE AND I WILL KEEP SAYING THAT GUYS) and backgrounds. The CGs have been picked on a bit but I think really they have varying quality. I’m not super CG focused so I didn't hugely take notice tbh.

Onto characers/routes

Nora!

Nora is terrific. She's a fully fleshed out character with a coherent personality that remains true across all routes. Some routes, due to the circumstances, emphasize certain traits more than others but at no point does Nora just...became a different person to fit with the LI.

I will say though, just because she was coherent and well written does not mean she’s never frustrating. She is, after all, a teenager under stress. There's one route in particular where I wanted to smack her upside the head but that's just because one of Nora's key traits is non-complimentary to one of mine. I think it's probably a good sign of writing that I like her anyhow - and feel so strongly about it. She has flaws, she has strengths, and the two are not as clearly delineated as all that - what works in one scenario or route might be a poor coping mechanism for the next, etc.

I never tired of her, anyhow and I always rooted for her. She won’t be to everyone’s taste, but she is a solidly written character I forgive a lot of flaws when that’s the case. And I did actually like her over all.

Though I will say, I feel bad she never eats the breakfast her mom makes. #easilyguilted

Anyhow what more can I say...Nora's plot line is the key plot line here (I call it a sub-plot a few times but it's really a co-plot) and is handled more or less similarly in each route. How you get the answers to your questions varies, and the trouble you get in varies, but the outcome in the good endings is roughly all equal. This was a little unsatisfactory in one route (detailed below) because of what I consider "integration" issues with it's co-plots.

Also Nora's boy-phobia in every route is hysterical after you've played enough of them.

On to LIs – I'm doing these in the order I played them, so the reviews may reference one another a bit for comparison because I'm lazy and self-referential writing is easy.

Ewan

Okay so full disclosure – I always love anything Fae and I always like the Tall One(TM) so I am hugely biased in favour of Ewan. That said, his route is superb, with a huge focus on exploring Nora's life in a way that interacts with Ewan's. His story really unfolds in relation to how you interact with him - and not just in the obvious way but because, unlike some the plot in his story is very personal and very much reflects Nora’s progress.

The route really deep dives into what's going on with Nora - not just near the end but from the very start. It has a lot of Ally in it (more than Corvin's route, I felt) and plenty of Spencer. In general I'd say family is a strong theme through this whole route - not just yours. If that's the sort of story line you appreciate - I strongly recommend Ewan.

As a character Ewan sort of looks the part of the bad boy but doesn't really fall into any of the true stereotypical behaviour. What he does follow is really very reasonably applied and has ties to his actual personality. He has great banter with Nora and a solid personal arc that he is polite enough to explicitly spell out for you about half way/three quarters through.

Also in other routes he consistently overcomes his Ewan-ness in the name of sandwiches which is, frankly, adorable.

Since this story really gets into the nitty gritty of Nora's personal plot, it could feel slightly "spoilery" for the over all mystery. On the other hand, I found it really let me focus on the LI-related plots, since I wasn't trying to split my focus since I knew what was going on with Nora.

Lastly – this route has a key supporting character who I adore. Honestly he might be my favourite supporting characters just for being so damn cute (well, second, I love Ally dearly). This felt like a pretty “social” route, with lots of the other LIs popping in, a good amount of your parents and lots and lots of Spencer.

Over all, this is a very strong route and my personal favourite.

Corvin

Corvin's route is a lot more traditional than Ewan's. The content is definitely closer to a 50/50 split and the LI plot and Nora's plot don't really integrate the same way – but they do interact. Corvin's personal plot also ties into Nora in a way that really explores the world and a side-character you see in several routes. Like Ewan’s it’s a slightly more personal plot than some of the other routes, in that it really deals with Corvin’s own outlook and beliefs.

I did find Nora a tiny bit frustrating in this route - but really only because I'd done Ewan's first. So another thing to consider when choosing who to do first (if you haven't decided, if you were excited for someone before reading this do them first!!)

Corvin as a character is wonderful – he has an appreciation for Nora that's really very sweet and his interactions with the rest of the cast are generally either hilarious or sweet. Like Ewan, he's not shallow and actually has a very interesting personal plot that dives deep into a totally non-Faerie aspect of the paranormal.

Corvin’s route is a bit insular in the same way Ewan’s was, but with different people in play. This is not a bad thing – each plot line uses the characters it needs to get the story to work. No one feels “left out”, I’m just making note of things really (I DO have critiques they are just not right here). Lots of Ally still, and a decent amount of Spencer for people invested in their platonic relationships too.

Special note on the (best) ending here – I liked it a lot (a lot) because it really dived into some interesting aspects of the setting which sort of tips me as liking this route more just in general though Corvin’s over all sort of tied for 2nd for me. While not my favourite route, I consider it equal in strength to Danny, Marc and William’s routes (maybe Ewan’s? I’m biased okay).

Danny

This route is a lot of fun – it's the first one I did where I felt like I was dealing with actual antagonists. There is certainly conflict in the other routes and even interpersonal conflict but it’s a very different flavour than what you get in Danny’s route.

And also, Nora is so thirsty in this one (but she cannot be blamed...Danny is fiiine)

Danny is not complicated – again not shallow and totally has depth – but he is genuinely as nice as he seems when you first meet him. Like seriously – I was grinning like a deranged loon for a good chunk of their interactions because they're so damn sweet. You also get a slightly different “take” on Nora’s personal plot in this – since it’s all the same plot the revelations don’t change but the outlook of people involved do inform their opinions on everything. This is one of the key examples of the really solid writing you find in Changeling actually.

As for side characters - there are a few unique to Danny's route. I liked them - at the very least as plot intensifier if not because I actually would want to hang out with them. You also get more Vilos (swoon) in Danny's route than you do Ewan or Corvin's. That said, the route specific characters are great and I want so badly to wrap some of them in blankets and feed them lycanthrope-friendly foods.

Plus Nora gets to party with everyone in this one* and it’s fun**

Danny’s route is a lot of fun and I liked it’s conflict quite a bit.

*wherein party is used colloquially to refer to any event, not an actual party

**wherein fun is not an objective term

Elliot

Okay Elliot let's see...well first off I love Elliot so much. His route has what might be my hands down favourite scene in all the routes. I have a save right before it to go re-live it again. Frankly, Elliot’s just adorable and several times had me cackling with amusement. He definitely has a very touchy route, so good for those of you who like hugs*

That said this is probably the route I'm most torn over story line wise, going so far as to say it’s my least favourite route, despite having one of my favourite love interests. Elliot and Nora's interpersonal plot is great, and Elliot's plot is pretty strong but I feel like the integration of Nora's plot with Elliot's is the weakest. I think the issue is the one I alluded to at the start – there are three fairly major plots in this route and not enough time to settle them all properly. Indeed, the Nora-Spencer plot line in this one frankly feels like it needed way more work on it and the way it’s handled while understandable, isn’t really what I think it needed.

Nora also in this one bugged me a little – but it wasn't so much that Nora was hugely different as this route really brought out the personality trait (shown in other routes) that I least enjoy in her (as in, it's one that bothers me for IRL people too, not in that it's poorly written).

There's not much to say on side characters - this route has lots of Marc in it which I really enjoyed, not getting a lot of him in the other routes but not a tonne of anyone else. In fact, the cast is pretty much the Lewises, the Vampire LIs and [Brenna - who is fantastic] for a good chunk. There is a reason for this in story, and in the end you do see mostly everyone for the last chapter or two.

I might recommend doing Elliot first, because I think maybe I was a little frustrated more by having other endings to compare it to. Over all I would say I think this is the weakest route, almost entirely on the merits of its ending rather than the strength of individual plots or characters. My spoiler-y critique can be found here.

*Not actual hugs but this game doesn't include any sexual elements and I'm trying to be both informative and incredibly vague

Marc

I did not expect to like Marc as much as I do. I don't tend to gravitate toward the standoffish LIs but Marc is a swell guy. He has his reasons, but also he's hugely more than just standoffish with very clear desires in what he wants for you.

You get lots of Cryptic politics in this route so I looooved that and it meshes pretty well with Nora's plot because it does not require the same level of focus-switching as in some of the other routes, with “lower” stakes or ones that are at least very personal to the characters.

The side characters are good – I felt so bad for one of them in this just...honestly terrible. And also, I wanted to light them on fire. Yeah for duality~ William pops up more in this route too! He's a sweetie. And he has a great scene with you in chapter. There's a goodly amount of Ally, and lots of Spencer. So much!

Speaking of Marc strongly dislikes Spencer and I while feel bad for Spencer – and Marc definitely is projecting some personal issues here but – it's nice to have someone completely in Nora's corner (also, it's hilarious after a point, at least if you have a slightly evil sense of humour). So if you want to feel vindicated about Stuff, I suggest watching Marc snark on your brother.

Marc is another strong route with a good conflict that blends the personal and the issues of the wider Cryptic community well.

William

William is, as stated elsewhere, a cutie. And what a sad cutie he is! My instinct, tbh, is not to want to kiss him it's to teleport to Pine Hollow and adopt him and shower him with platonic affection while somehow not enraging his groupies.

Nora is...obtuse in this route – I know she's overwhelmed but she takes a bit to clue into something hugely obvious. I chalk this up to her gut instinct to normalize things as best she can, but it does grate a little bit (in other routes I've been hesitant to note it because I'm fairly certain a large part of it is my familiarity with her plot line, rather than things being obvious)...but she blames poor helpful wee friend in this and D':

Anyhow – though this isn’t my favourite route I do want to highlight one part of it. I mentioned in Elliot’s route there are balance issues. Well William’s route is a display of excellent writing that invokes that and makes the fact there’s so much to cover and so little time part of the plot and problem. It’s also got excellent pacing – like Ewan’s route I spent a lot of this on edge because I knew something was coming and was just waiting for the shoe to drop. When it did it was a very “oh shit!” moment.

This has a pretty good number of supporting characters. You meet Guess, who is mentioned in Elliot’s route but I don’t think any others, who is a very interesting character.

William’s route I think utilizes the conflicts inherent to the characters super well, and has a really fascinating divergence based on your choices.

Non-route stuff

Ally

Not a route, but she's a constant I need to say that I love her. She's clearly an excellent friend and her relationship with Nora is strong in every route – though as I mentioned slightly more or less present depending on which route. She's never ever erased from the story line though - so don't fret about an LI replacing her just because she gets less screen time in certain routes. In those cases, it really has to do with the scope of the subplots in play rather than a hierarchy of importance of relationships and Nora never “switches” focus because she found a “more important” relationship (quotations bc I think that concept is bullshit).

Spoiler Character

There's a character who's just...a walking spoiler so I can't speak to them other then I really like them a lot. They're role varies per route but I find them very interesting in each and the routes come together to form their personality. I actually like them a lot, despite their role in everything and wish we could have seen more of them. This character really shines in a few routes – William’s and Corvin’s I’d say.

Spencer

Best awful little brother ever, would constantly attempt reconciliation with again.

But seriously, I quite like Spencer and his involvement varies - there's tonnes of him in Ewan's route, the relationship is a bit more tense in Danny's route, but in general the same story beats are hit if you're trying to repair your relationship. Because I am a huuuuge sap I have not done anything but that, so IDK what it's like if you engage in mutually assured destruction tactics.

I will say Spencer varies a lot per route - so it could be you get a route where he's less likeable depending on where you start. I wanted to drop kick him in one of the routes, but he was plenty likeable despite being a jerk in mooost of the others (people with contentious sibling histories might find some of it difficult? I don't have any expertise in that so I can’t say sorry).

The Brownie

Cutie. Such a cutie. Again you see more of them (I am not up on my brownie sexual dimorphism nor their place in the gender binary) in Ewan's route (since it's the Fae route) and I love them dearly and feel weirdly protective of them. Also Nora calls them ugly and Nora is wrong. See first word: c-u-t-i-e.

[kathillards]

misc morphicon stories

ok so i feel like i’ve talked FOREVER about all the wild shit that happened to us at morphicon (running into rangers at the car valet!! meeting chip lynn!! azim calling us his favorite ladies at the con!!) but i wanted to make a write up for all the stuff i haven’t talked about yet because i have to remember all this and i want you all to experience it too!! it was so fun oh my god if you haven’t been to morphicon... start making plans for 2020 guys it is legit INSANE best weekend of my entire LIFE

- ann marie crouch is AN ACTUAL PRINCESS SENT FROM HEAVEN we ran into her on our way back to the hotel one of the days and we were like omg it’s princess shayla we love you!! and she was so sweet and stopped and talked to us even though she was on her way out for a nap and she was in full shayla gear she looked so pretty! and we saw her on the way back too she had changed into casual clothes but still rocking it WE LOVE ONE MENTOR ONLY

- jessica rey is so funny and adorable omg we stopped by her booth to buy wild force pins (kat and abbey) bc the wf rangers come PREPARED w/ merch and nobody was there so we all just started talking to her and told her how we loved wild force and alyssa and abbey said she loved the ep where alyssa beat up the boys and she’s so cute and fun to talk to!! she told us about the shades of pink panel and i was like “is alyssa a pink or a white ranger” and she was like “lol i dont even know” also she had her handler take a staged candid of us talking to her because she loved us lmao. and then we were talking about white rangers and all of us were like “fuck tommy lives we stan alyssa only” and she laughed and immediately started telling us about what a dick jdf had been to fans the day before lmao (also for real...he’s a dick) and i was like YOU ARE THE SUPERIOR WHITE TIGER RANGER god shes so cool she loved us and didnt wanna stop talking but we had to move away cuz ppl were lining up for her behind us rip

- RICHARD AND ANGIE oh my god ok so i’d stopped and talked to angie on the first day and also the second day and i told her i’d come back later bc i wanted a photo w/ BOTH OF THEM and i did tell her how much i loved madison and vida like we are ROCCA SISTER STANS FIRST PEOPLE SECOND and shes so cute and she remembered us every time!! and then on the third day i finally got to talk to richard and he’s so sweet we talked about mystic force just at his booth for like ten minutes waiting for angie for the photo op, he asked us our fave episodes and i said dark wish and he actually remembered it so i think he might be the only actor at the con who watched his season. and we told him we loved the mystic force theme song AND HE STARTED SINGING IT. and someone had left him a green zeo figurine for...some reason and he told us “i dont even fucking know who that is” (but nicer lol he is very charming and polite) and we told him it was adam/johnny and he was like ohhhh lmao i love disney era actors not knowing SHIT about saban era. like he literally worked with johnny. i love him. AND THEN HE ASKED US ALL TO BE IN THE PHOTO and since kat paid for half of it we were like aight its a group thing and its the cutest photo i love disney era actors only

- i think i talked about meeting dwayne cameron already but god hes so sweet and i felt bad for him bc caitlin next to him had ppl she was talking to but he was all alone so me and abbey just went up and started talking to him and i told him i loved overdrive and i told him i recognized him as ethan’s bully and we talked about tyzonn and vella and just overdrive in general and hes so SWEET and he HUGGED ME SO TIGHT GOD i think he really enjoyed us like. actually loving overdrive and being able to talk about it. AND HE RAN INTO ABBEY IN CARS LAND AT DISNEY ON MONDAY AND GAVE HER ANOTHER HUG hes so cute (angie was also there with him I LOVE DISNEY ERA SOLIDARITY)

- met monica may and cerina vincent on saturday, not a lot to say bc i only talked to them a bit and took my photos but they are both so beautiful and elegant and classy and i told cerina i loved her in stuck in the middle :’) ranger ladies are so intimidatingly pretty god. also picked up this huge LEGIT spd poster and im gonna put it up in my room as soon as i can because oh my god its professional quality it looks so cool. we also talked to greg aronowitz bc kat wanted her poster signed and hes so cool we told him how much we appreciated everything he did for spd AND THAT WE WERE ON HIS SIDE ABOUT FEMALE RED FUCK DISNEY.

- god what else uhh we wandered around the toys section a lot on saturday/sunday bc we’d kinda. seen everyone. and there were a lot of panels on sunday so nobody was at the booths. i picked up those amazing rider/sentai prints from ceevee SUPER TALENTED SO WORTH IT. also got me a meteor storm figuart B) which i havent taken out of the box yet but i will

- HECTOR AT THE CAR VALET he literally announced he would be at morphicon the day before and then we saw him while waiting for our car and SCREAMED and he was so chill and cool and he came over and hugged us all hes so hot. AND THEN LATER WE RAN INTO SELWYN WARD AT THE CAR VALET and he also laughed when we squealed and came over and hugged us all and guys he smelled soooo nice i was like right up against him i could have died hes so handsome and perfect.

- we also ran into steve cardenas at the car valet like right when we were all leaving the hotel for the last time and we told him that we loved him and i said i was so excited that it was rocky coming back for the anniversary instead of fucking jason and abbey was like “justice for forever red!” and he was like hah i know right anyway every single actor in this franchise hates jdf lmao that was just the vibe of morphicon and it was valid

- fun fact we did not see jdf ONCE. not going to the con, not at the hotel, not ANYWHERE. just his crazy lines. he was like the douchebag cryptid. im glad tho he can stay that way.

- i talked about meeting andre on saturday night right??? hes so SWEET I LOVE HIM he was so happy when ben gave him his fanart of eddie and took a selfie w/ ben right then and there and also took a pic w/ me and abbey ugh i love him i told him he was so valid for being a power rangers youtuber and liking megaforce AND THAT HE’S THE BEST INTERVIEWER THEY’VE EVER HAD (i also told azim this, i’m very passionate about this subject, every other ranger interviewer sucks ASS)

- jason faunt at the elevators!! hes so sweet i told him how excited i was for the anniversary and he said yeah theres a lot more plot going on and told me to take a selfie bc they couldnt stop him here fhjggd i love that pic i love him AND THEN ALSO later we ran into NAKIA IN AN ELEVATOR AND SHES SO SWEET I SAID “WE LOVE YOU WE WATCHED ALL OF ZEO FOR YOU” and she was like aww thank you so much!! a literal goddess AND THEN LATER AS WE WERE CHECKING OUT karan walked by us to go to nakia and i was so excited i waved and said hi to her and she said “hi baby how are you” SHES SO WONDERFUL I LOVE MY MOTHERS

- i think i told the chris reid story already but like. hes so charming and was so nice even tho i interrupted his express checkout but like. i Had to tell him how valid ninja steel was i was literally like fuck the dudebros they’re so annoying you guys fighting w/ that one guy on twitter over the kcas was the FUNNIEST thing to EVER happen to this fandom and he laughed.

- we also went up to kelson’s booth later and told him how much we loved mick and all his roles!! and talked to him forever about all of them, told him we were kalish/disney era supremacists, told him HOW GOOD HE IS AT VOICE ACTING WE LOVE FLIT AND NORG IN THIS HOUSE he looked so happy :’) i feel like everyone just compliments him on boom which, no offense, but appreciate your voice actors guys. i told him we grew up on disney era and it was like new zealand only had twelve actors and he was five of them and he laughed and was like yeah. i also told him how we loved mick and brody’s father/son relationship and he was like yeah they ended up liking that a lot too which is why they sort of pushed brody’s real dad to the side so mick could shine more and i was like that’s LEGIT. i also told him the prism was brody’s mother and he agreed so that’s canon now. AND I TOLD HIM how fucking dark ninja steel went w/ his storyline literally being about slavery and human trafficking and he was like I KNOW RIGHT and we just talked about how dumb everyone is for being mean to ninja steel and chris showed up at this point too and we all laughed about it together

- ok and then tbh we just spent all of sunday loitering around the megaforce cast but it was worth it because they LOVE US oh my god we talked to them like all sunday about just. everything. azim’s gf jordan was there and she kept telling us to just stick around we talked to her a lot, we asked her about alex heartman and like where tf was he and she said he was working :( BUT AZIM AND ALEX ARE STILL CLOSE so victory. azim also told us a bunch of little stories like how he and the megaforce cast searched for a house to stay in together and ended up finding one at the base of a volcano and he and drew would race around the volcano in the mornings like the crazy people they are, we told him how much we loved andrew’s ACTING SKILLS and “do you see any tears” and he cracked up and said “they used to call me ‘freaky tiki man’ all the time because of that one line” and he told us about other fan encounters and things, we told him on saturday how we all met and became friends because we were the only ppl who loved and defended megaforce and he was SO TOUCHED HES SO SWEET GOD i would die for him. 

- cameron gave us (me and kat) all his money to buy him lunch from the food trucks and i guess just trusted that we loved megaforce so much we wouldn’t just run away with all his money????? and he was absolutely correct we got him teriyaki chicken with garlic noodles and he loved us. his handler also asked us to buy him food and gave us his CREDIT CARD dfhdgfjgdf like power rangers people are wild man. who just gives their credit card to random 20yo girls and just. trusts that they love this children’s show so much they won’t steal it??? i mean they were right and we didn’t but still. AND HE MADE ME AIRDROP one of my megaforce reaction pics to his phone because he loved it so much (it’s the one of jake and emma and orion looking super done, that i had ben redraw for me, so we showed them both pics and all three of them LOVED IT) and cameron even looked ben up on deviantart to see it fdgjkdfdg he loves usss. christina was telling us how they were talking about us at dinner and cameron told her that we were his favorite part of the con :’)) azim also mentioned that they talked about us at dinner because he said to kat “we were discussing that you look like that girl from 10 things i hate about you who was julia stiles’ best friend” LIKE IMAGINE. HAVING THE MEGAFORCE CAST. DISCUSS WHO YOU LOOK LIKE FDJGKDHFJGD they’re so cute ugh and azim and cameron hugged us all goodbye and john mark and christina said goodbye too and i just. love them. so much. 

- at one point cameron asked me and kat how old we were and she was like “twenties...as a group we are in our early twenties” and he was like “.... so old enough to know how a hangover feels right?” and we lost it dfgjfdkdgjh and i said “if i were an actor i would just be stoned the whole con” AND CAMERON JUST NODDED AGGRESSIVELY god the entire cast was definitely hungover and they’re so valid. except christina, we asked her and she said she only had a milkshake so maybe she was their designated driver. 

- andrew is so chill too (i mean i do think he is perpetually high but its fine) i think he just loves talking??? like he’s there for the babies (so many babies!! and they love troy so much!!! hes so adorable with them) and then he just wants to chill like we went up to him on sunday and he was like oh hey did you guys see this picture and he pulled out his phone and showed a pic of the megaforce cast doing a goofy zombie pose at their photo ops and he told us his backstory on each of their zombie poses like. who does this??? he’s so adorable.

- and ofc we stopped by christina again on sunday bc she’s THE FAVE and shes just so cuuute ugh and i told her i loved all asian rangers bc i am asian!! and she was like omg are you?? and i was like yeah i’m south asian and she was like omg so that’s all part of asia too OH I GET IT SO WE’RE BOTH ASIAN and i was like YES AND YOU’RE ALL MY RANGERS and she smiled at me it was like staring at the sun tbh. i love and would die for her.

- when we went to say goodbye to the megaforce cast cameron just looked at all of us standing around his booth and was like, so genuinely, “you guys are the best” and it still makes me cry thinking about it. AND AZIM’S FACE when we all said “megaforce’s defenders never surrender!” to him he had the sweetest smile god i really would take a bullet for the entire megaforce cast in a heartbeat. they are the sweetest angels & deserve the world. if any of you breathe a word wrong about jake holling in my general vicinity ever again i will fry your intestines and eat them for breakfast thank you GOODBYE.

[sage-nebula]

#Just Paradigm Shift Things, #Just Kova Things

Sequel post to this one, but this time it’s a Kova Edition™. Inspired by conversations with my bff @severalbakuras.

Kova’s ranking of the team, in order from Most Favorite to Least Favorite, is as follows: 1.) Narti 2.) Keith 3.) Acxa 4.) Zethrid 5.) Ezor 6.) Lotor The reasoning is:

Narti is His Person™, the one he is telepathically bonded with, so obviously she is his Most Favorite™.

Note: This is only because Haggar’s not around. Haggar (because she is actually Honerva) is his Most Most Favorite™ and he makes that known by purring like a little traitor whenever he’s in her presence.

Keith pets Kova in just the way Kova likes, and also lets Kova nap on his chest / stomach when he’s lying down in the lounge. Keith is also nice and quiet, generally, and also talks to Kova like Kova is an adult person, and all of these qualities of Keith’s are ones that Kova likes.

Acxa is very similar to Keith, except she doesn’t let Kova nap on her, so that loses her points. She does, however, sometimes dangle things for Kova to play with, which Kova will do on rare occasions when no one else is around to see and he doesn’t lose dignity for it. So he still likes Acxa a lot, just a little less than Keith.

Zethrid talks to Kova like he’s an adult person, but she also pets way too roughly most of the time, and Kova doesn’t like that. So she loses mega points. (She also tries to roughhouse with him, and he highkey doesn’t appreciate that. However, she does give him space catnip sometimes, so. She redeems herself a little.)

Ezor, no matter how many times she’s reminded he hates it, babytalks Kova. Kova is not a baby. He doesn’t appreciate being talked to like one. And yet, Ezor does it anyway, and then complains when he blows her off as a result. So she’s one of his least favorites, especially since she also sometimes tries to pick him up when he doesn’t want to be picked up, and then complains when he scratches her. (It’s her own fault, in his opinion. She should know better.)

Lotor is Kova’s absolute least fave because of the following list of Crimes™:

Has said many, many disparaging things about Haggar, not the least of which being that he consistently refers to her as “the witch.” You know how, in The Sims, characters get little red minus signs above their heads when other sims do things they don’t like? That’s Kova in this situation. Every time Lotor badmouths Haggar in front of him, Kova gets those double red minus signs above his head. (The others disparage Haggar as well, but Kova figures this is because of Lotor’s bad influence and so he’s more willing to forgive them.)

Got himself exiled to Revender in childhood, which led to Kova being sent with him, so Kova was separated from Haggar in the first place.

Did not perform well enough in exile to get himself out of exile so they could both leave.

Left Revender anyway, and left Kova there. (Kova was well taken care of but that’s not the point. The point is he wanted to go back to Haggar.)

Only went back for Kova years later. This was a Crime™, but was also somewhat forgiven because Lotor gave Kova to Narti, and Kova likes Narti a whole lot. Not more than Haggar, but it’s close. Still though. Still.

Once had a large cat tree purchased for Kova that came in an equally as large box, and then had the box thrown away before Kova had a chance to even sit in it once. Possibly one of the most heinous Crimes™ Lotor has ever done, in Kova’s esteemed opinion.

Also just, in general, Haggar doesn’t like Lotor, and Kova loves Haggar, so Kova figures Haggar knows what’s up and follows her lead.

As you can figure, Lotor has tried many, many times to get Kova to like him, to no avail. This started during his exile, wherein Kova was literally the only living soul in his exile he felt that he could actually potentially have companionship with (Diak was there, but as we know Diak did not treat him well at all), but Kova wasn’t having it no matter what Lotor tried. And over the years, Lotor has tried many things, including (but not limited to):

The purchase of the aforementioned cat tree.

Trying to tempt Kova with toys, catnip, and treats.

Asking Kova plainly how they might establish a better relationship (to which Kova hissed with his ears back before returning to grooming himself). And nothing worked. Every now and then he still tries, though. He still tries.

Quintessence is very addictive, and Kova’s immortality is due to being given quintessence when he was younger. He’s not quite as addicted now, but that addiction resurfaces if he’s ever exposed to raw quintessence. When this happens, usually en route to the storage room, Kova sits outside wherever it’s stored for hours (sometimes days) and meows incessantly to try to get someone to give it to him. This video is a good example of what Kova sounds like. Narti does not lose her patience often, but she often loses it whenever Kova has gotten wind of some quintessence, because he is her eyes and his obsession means she ends up “staring” at the door to the storage room until he finally gives up.

Speaking of, Narti always has to cut their connection at night when it’s time for her to sleep. The reason for this is because Kova likes to make it his nightly mission to rampage throughout the castle corridors, and if she doesn’t sever their connection, she’s kept awake by his Feline Zest For Life™ as he sprints hell for leather around the castle doing god knows what for god knows what reason.

Kova has great respect for the Lions. This great respect inspires him to bring the Lions tributes. These tributes are the corpses of small space rodents and pests hunted from whatever planet they land on (whenever they land on a planet), often left in the cockpit of the Lions. (The Black Lion only gets one if Keith was the last one to pilot her. If Kova gets in there and smells Lotor’s scent more strongly, Black does not get a tribute that day.)

The team themselves also get presents in the form of dead rodents, usually left on their pillows. Note that this doesn’t include Ezor and Lotor, because he doesn’t care about them enough to do so.

The space mice, if anyone is wondering, are alive and well and living with Allura and Coran on Hauli. Kova did try to eat one or two when they were first discovered, but Keith told him “no” and Narti got him to spit them out before any lasting harm was done. Kova was disappointed, but he listened to Narti. The space mice are fine. Kova’s kills are other creatures.

The auxiliary team members, even if they think Kova is cute at first, tend to not be very big fans of him after about a week or two in the castle. This is for two main reasons:

The sofa in the lounge, you may have noticed, is white. Kova’s fur is black. Kova’s fur gets all over that sofa (and all over everything else tbh), and the auxiliary teams often have chore duty that requires them to clean it. The couch needs a thorough cleaning about once a week. Everyone takes turns, but the couch in particular is a monster and no one likes having to lint brush up that much cat hair.

They also have to undergo Kova Bath Duty™.

Kova hates baths. Kova really hates baths. He does not like being wet, he does not like being scrubbed down. As a cat, he can do a lot of self-grooming, but sometimes he does still need a bath, and he hates it, and so does everyone else.

Prior to the auxiliary teams being recruited, it was a full team effort to bathe Kova. It literally did take all six of the main team to not only catch him (once he realized it was bathtime, he was out of there), but also to wrangle him into the tub. All of them have scars from his claws and fangs due to his efforts to escape what he saw as unjust torment. Even Narti.

This got foisted onto Auxiliary Team One once Auxiliary Team One was formed, because to be honest it’s beyond Teams Two and Three. (However, those on Teams Two and Three can volunteer to try, and if they succeed it greatly increases their chances for promotion. Many often volunteer because they think it’s a joke, but once they actually attempt the gauntlet they realize it is no joke, it is sheer Hell. So far, no one has succeeded.) Team One members usually go for it in full armor. The main squad thinks this is a wise decision.

Kova has a very nice cat bed that Lotor puchased for him once that had a price tag of 80 GAC. He has never once slept in it. Narti has not had the heart to tell Lotor this.

Kova does not like to eat his food at his bowl. Instead, he will get a mouthful of food, carry it to wherever Narti is, drop it on the floor, and then eat it one piece at a time. This means it is not uncommon to find cat kibble scattered around the castle, particularly since Kova will leave behind pieces he doesn’t like, despite all of the pieces appearing relatively the same to everyone who isn’t him.

To make sure he gets an appropriate amount of exercise, the team has set up a Kova Mode in the training room, which basically consists of about fifty laser cannons set up around the training room that point lasers at various places on the floor and walls for him to chase. The lasers are harmless---even if Kova runs straight into them, they won’t hurt him---but the point isn’t to hit him with the lasers, anyway. The point is to make him run around the room chasing the lasers, which he does, with great determination. (And it is determination, not enthusiasm, how dare you accuse him of being enthused by the lasers. He’s not. He’s not, do you hear him? He’s not.)

Sometimes Kova likes to crawl into the tiny little ducts around the castle, and it is always a challenge of the utmost degree to try to get him out again.

Keith does end up eventually getting the space wolf in this reality as well, albeit under different circumstances and with no secret altean colony nonsense to go along with it. He names this wolf Nyx. This information is relevant to Kova because when Nyx joins the team, Kova decides to show Nyx who is boss pretty much immediately. This results in Nyx placing her paw on Kova and holding him down against the floor---not enough to hurt him, but just enough to show him that she is not going to be bossed about by him. Kova gets the message, but he is not happy about it. As such, he changes his ranking of Most Favorite to Least Favorite as follows: 1.) Narti 2.) Acxa 3.) Zethrid 4.) Ezor 5.) Keith 6.) Lotor As far as Kova is concerned, Keith bringing Nyx to the castle was a Crime™ of the highest order. Bad enough Keith started having a romance with Lotor, but then he brings a wolf to the castle? Unacceptable betrayal. J’accuse! Kova will not forgive this, not ever. (Or at least not for a very long time.) It should be noted that the Black Lion is thrilled about this, beacuse it means that she no longer has dead animals left in her cockpit courtesy of Kova.

 At some point after Nyx comes to the castle, Kova is exposed to quintessence again and thus takes up his standard position of yowling outside the door to get some. Nyx figures that Kova might calm down if she sings him the song of her people, and thus begins howling. This does not calm Kova down, but instead results in him yowling more loudly so that he can make sure he is heard over Nyx . . . who then begins howling louder because he must hear the song of her people to be moved by it. All in all, this results in the castle being filled with the dulcet tones of a yowling cat and howling wolf for hours on end. No one is amused by this.

[phoebe-fucking-bridgers]

i was tagged by @fantasmagoriam thank you (your dog is really cute) !! sorry it’s taken me a while i’ve been sick af 

rules: answer 10 questions and then ask 10

1. Favorite tropes in fiction? 

there’s one called because you were nice to me, and somebody once matched it up to my mbti and truer words have never been spoken. also the trickster is a fave of mine - this is such a good question but i can’t dwindle down a lot of them 

2. A video game you could play over and over again?

fallout: new vegas,, the light of my life , the one true ally 

3. Any achievements you’re really proud of? (may be getting the 1st prize in a contest or making a really good cake once, doesn’t matter what it is as long as you’re proud of it) 

im pretty proud of my cakes (that wasn’t meant to sound like an innuendo) there’s not a lot else tbh, i’ve done my duke of Edinburgh award but that’s about it?? 

4. Game/book/movie with the best ending? 

oh man pan’s labyrinth . . im so torn because on the one hand i felt like ofelia was freed to go fully into the fantasy world that had been half of her story, but also i can’t help wondering if it was just a child’s imagination and (spoilers ahead) all that happened was she got shot by that bastard of a man and thats it

5. If you could have any wild animal as a pet which one would you pick?

dragon idk maybe just an animal that was happy to be domesticated and didn’t mind not being in the wild, i know that people have managed to keep foxes as pets before and they’re cute as hell

6. Most emotional fictional moment?

god there are a lot for me, i listened to the taz finale not long ago and the scene where taako thought lup was gone and he was ready to kill lucretia may or may not have made me cry. in vegas too, the scene where joshua graham admits he wanted to make his anger “God’s anger” and that his own vengeance was sort of his demons?? but also because he calls them the “fires” that keep burning so if you take the quote from his gun - “the light shineth in darkness and the darkness comprehended it not” - i get the feeling that his hatred towards caesar is all that’s keeping him going and its sort of become his faith or the light or whatever  you want to call it. it wasn’t an especially emotional moment for him but idk it just affected me a lot more than i thought it would, seeing all he had left was his pain.  god this is way too much text but im just v sensitive esp. regarding fiction and i could give you a hundred more examples. you asked for the most and i am Sorry

7. What makes you happy in life?

analyzing joshua graham apparently

8. Best song of all time?

i  lov . . . so many . right now my favourite song is Down to the Bottom by Dorothy

9. Do you have any OCs? If yes, what inspired you to create them?

yes thank you they are my children, most of them came from video games or aus tbh (there are more but i’m running up too much of a list rn)

rudy - an Asshole, elven mage fueled by bitterness that morrigan was straight. wtf, bioware, do you know how many gifts i'd given her . . .

jamie grant - courier six, she’s pretty soft on the people around her but Don’t Make Her Angry, as the legion found out. after getting shot in the head she went running after benny to get some revenge, and unraveled more of her past than she wanted to

riviera - a Warden straight out of the alienage, chaotic good, charmer of zevrans, at this point it’s just 100% projection (sorry riv) 

some ocs i just base off of tropes or a single story line, i usually work up an image of them in my head and go from there

10. … Who stole the cookie from the cookie jar?

who me?? yes you.. couldn’t have been then who?

i tag: @lostboysandneverland @saintsrowtwo @teacupchimera @elise-biman @carmillaisabottom and anyone else that wants to do it - none of you have to do it of course or you can just pick ten questions of your own ??

and my questions are: 

1. if you could live in any era when would it be? 2. are you more of a leader or a follower?  3. what do you think is the best quality in a person? 4. what’s the worst quality in a person?  5. if you could go back in time and change a moment in history what would it be? 6. if someone told you the moment you changed would have a cataclysmic effect, either entirely positive or negative, would you still do it?  7. would you rather spend a night in a library or out camping? 8. what’s your dream job, if you have one? 9. do you think zodiac signs have any weighing on who you are? 10. if you could relive any moment of your life what would it be? 

[jugsdead-blog]

Veronica, on the other hand, has a bad habit of repressing her own negative emotions (she prefers helping literally anyone else with their problems). Usually something trivial sets her off, like Kevin bemoaning having to hide his relationship with Joaquin from his dad, or Archie briefly wondering if his dad would like it if he built a gazebo (Betty tries desperately to talk him out of it until Jughead says plainly, “You would literally die if you tried to build something by yourself, Archie” and that’s that, really). But it has Veronica thinking about her own father; how it’s been over a year since he’s held her in his arms, how when he calls her “Princess” over the phone, his voice is strained and tired. On days like those, she asks Jughead if he wants to watch Paper Moon and he keeps her close as she cries through it.

8. Who sleeps in their underwear (or naked)/ Who sleeps in their pajamas? Jughead usually sleeps in a pair of his dad’s (or Archie’s) old sweatpants and a t-shirt. He’s surprised when he sees Veronica in a simple–not sexy, not chic–if anything, it’s too large to be truly flattering–t-shirt for the first time. He laughs when she tells him how she wears pearls and designer nightgowns to Cheryl’s sleepovers to annoy Penelope Blossom, and she laughs with him.

9. Who makes the coffee (or tea)? Veronica is not shocked when she finds out Jughead has been drinking coffee black for most of his life (”Since I was eight,” he says it like he’s proud and Veronica rolls her eyes so hard she gives nearly herself a headache). Eventually she thinks she is able to convince him that, yes, herbal tea can soothe nerves. He never says so outright, but he always appears appreciative when Veronica has some extra tea with her (Veronica had initially not enjoyed having to semi-permanently trade her favorite Prada handbag for a clunky Marc Jacobs shoulder bag on the off-chance Jughead was feeling anxious that day and she needed two thermoses instead of one, but when she pulls it out and he looks at her like she may well have hung the moon, she finds she doesn’t really care).

10. Who likes sweet/ Who likes sour? Jughead likes every kind of candy, but he leans toward sweet. Veronica, as a rule, doesn’t eat candy, but sometimes Jughead hands her a piece of whatever he’s enjoying that day and she can never find it in herself to say no.

11. Who likes horror movies/ Who likes romance movies? They both really love bad horror movies. Not movies that are meant to be bad, but movies that are actually trying to be good and just end up bad. By the end of most movies, it sounds like they’re just trying to out-scoff each other, Jughead saying things like “Wow, that transition was atrocious” over Veronica’s insistence that, surely, they could have found a better looking male lead considering they didn’t even bother to find a good actor.

When the mood strikes her Veronica will turn on a Nicholas Sparks movie, much to Jughead’s vocal dismay. She smirks when he asks her to pause the movie he supposedly hates while he goes to the bathroom, but doesn’t push the issue.

NOTE: i’m skipping 12 bc it turned into an honest to god FIC which i will finish later :-)

13. Who is considered the scaredy cat? + 14. Who kills the spiders Veronica considers herself pretty fearless…but her resolve is broken the second she sees a creepy-crawly in the ridiculous amount of space she refers to as her “personal area.” Usually, she asks someone else (Jughead) to “get it away” but also insists that they do it without actually killingthe thing, which Jughead finds both impossibly annoying and incredibly endearing.

16. Who is scared of thunderstorms? Neither of them tbh. I think Jughead enjoys them while Veronica only laments what the humidity is going to do to her hair.

18. Who is a cat person/ Who is a dog person? Jughead has only ever had a dog, and thus considers himself a Dog Person™, but he doesn’t hate cats with a fiery passion like Archie does.

19. Who loves to call the other one cute names? Veronica, but only because it annoys the ever loving fuck out of Jughead. The only thing he is ok with is ‘Juggie’ but Veronica has come up with several nauseating variations (Juggie-poo, Juggie-pie, Dollface???, Sugar lips????), much to the delight of one Kevin Keller.

20. Who is dominant/ Who is submissive?
In their day-to-day lives, Veronica is dominant. And though Jughead puts on a show of battling her at every turn, he usually ends up doing what she wants (sometimes he realizes it doesn’t bother him as much as it should, but then he tucks the thought away because it makes his stomach flutter and, honestly? fuck that)

21. Who has an obsession (over anything)? Jughead is obsessed with Tarantino, as everyone knows. He makes Veronica watch the movies she has seen with director commentary. Veronica smiles when Jughead finds it in himself to talk over even the great Tarantino in order to make a point about the film.

22. Who goes all out for Valentine’s Day? Veronica takes it to a level that Jughead can’t even imagine. Chocolate, flowers, at some point there is a barbershop quartet? The entire day was honestly a blur, ending with Veronica renting out the local cinema and playing what was essentially a chronological marathon of the best Film Noir to ever grace the silver screen.

(The look of happy surprise on her face when Jughead gives her a simple necklace is not one he’ll forget)

24. Who is the talker/ Who is the listener? Jughead rants a lot, but sometimes Veronica will get a little gossip-y…and though Jughead sees himself as “above” that sort of thing, he listens and responds as if she were telling him a very important life event.

25. Who wears the other ones clothes? Veronica Lodge is nothing if not a master at accessorizing. She’ll take a shirt Jughead has grown too tall to wear comfortably and somehow look better in it than he, or anyone, could even hope to.

One time Jughead wore one of Veronica’s bags to Pop’s instead of his usual sack, but that’s a different story entirely

27. Who takes a long shower/ Who sings in the shower? Veronica does both. Jughead listens.

29. Who is the better cook? Jughead can cook simple things. He’s learned to take care of himself since his dad was away a lot. Veronica, on the other hand, is appalled if you ask her to toast a piece of bread.

31. Who is more affectionate? Veronica is more affectionate in public, but you’d have to be watching to notice the little things she does (rest her hand on his leg, fix his hat, slide her unfinished food over to him at Pop’s). In private, Veronica is surprised at how affectionate Jug can be. He has a weird fixation with her hair (“it’s really soft,” he says plainly) and is constantly plays with it when they’re alone.

32. Who likes to have really long (deep) conversation? Jughead loves him some deep conversation. He especially loves it when Veronica disagrees with what he’s saying, because their debates are spirited and sometimes she makes some points that he finds really hard to argue (he does anyway, but).

33. Who would wear “not guilty” t-shirt/ Who would wear “sin” t-shirt? Kevin got a matching set for them (AND INSISTED ON Veronica being “Not Guilty” and Jughead being “Sin”) as a joke (and taking pictures) while Veronica complained about the quality of the fabric and Jughead just complained.

38. Who likes to star gaze? They both enjoy a quiet night together looking up at the stars. Sometimes Jughead will point out the few constellations that he actually remembers from Astronomy, and Veronica will hum and listen while she traces them with her fingers.

Sometimes, Veronica will talk about what her horoscope sai that morning. Jughead can go on for hours about how astrology is bullshit but he doesn’t argue when Veronica tells him their signs are “like, freakishly compatible.”

39. Who buys cereal for the prize inside? Jughead has a private (very private) collection of cracker jack prizes that he knows Archie would lose or break. He flushes when Veronica comes across them while she’s browsing through his wardrobe (as she is prone to do to anyone who will let her), but she doesn’t laugh. Instead she smiles and asks about each one, about when he started collecting them, about how he managed to keep track of them (and it feels like something private between them).

47. Who has the more complex coffee order? Veronica used to pride herself on her complex orders, but apparently she’s spoiled Jughead with her Rich People Coffee™ because he visibly grimaced every time he has to drink something that isn’t a venti, half-whole milk, one quarter 1%, one quarter non-fat, extra hot, split quad shots (1 ½ shots decaf, 2 ½ shots regular), no foam latte, with whip, 2 packets of splenda, 1 sugar in the raw, a touch of vanilla syrup and 3 short sprinkles of cinnamon.

50. Who is the hopeless romantic Veronica, 100%. She honestly believes that everyone has a soul mate. Jughead is infinitely more jaded and openly disagrees with her, but every time they argue, Veronica says something stupid like, “Soulmates argue, too. So we’ll be fine.” and Jughead’s resolve is gone.

[idealisticrealism]

Blindspot 2x15 recap

(aka the one where the team does their own version of WifeSwap and also takes down a trafficking ring)

So I don't know if anyone is still interested in these (other than the couple of anons who have been gently reminding me about getting this done haha) but in honour of the new ep this week, here's my recap of last ep aka ~The Dream Team Reshuffle~

Okay so are these Kurt/Roman sparring sessions a spectator sport?? Because if so, seriously sign me up right now for a lifetime membership haha. Goddamn. And I just-- I mean, the level of trust here? The kindness? Weller understands that Roman needs both freedom and an outlet, so he gives him both, under the guise of 'triggering memories' for information on Sandstorm. Sure, that's the official explanation, but lbr he really just did it because he knows how he would feel being in Roman's shoes. And plus, what better way to get to know the brother of the woman he's in love with? ~Brother-in-law bonding time~ Aaww yeaahhh. I also love that he actually pins Roman-- Roman may be a trained warrior, but Weller's no slouch either. Just because he wears a suit most of the time doesn't erase the fact that he's literally one of the best agents the FBI has. And then ughhh Jane comes in just as he's got Roman pinned and I love that the vibe is instantly like "uh-oh, busted" haha. I love the shock in Jane’s voice though and the way she says 'Kurt'-- tbh I think it's both a "Kurt don't hurt him" and "Kurt is everything okay" because in that split second she doesn't know if this fight is just sparring or has turned real and there's just a flicker of panic where she doesn't know what to do and then Roman is all "we're fine" (aka ‘chill sis we're just engaging in manly bonding’) and she just stares, even more shocked, as Weller grins and pulls Roman to his feet. Like literally this scene has been going for like 30 seconds and I just love everything it has achieved-- Roman is proving to Weller that he can be trusted, bc he didn't try to hurt him or escape while they were sparring, Weller is proving to Roman that he understands and respects his needs and that they can be allies despite coming from opposing sides, and Weller's proving to Jane that he's good hubby material :P and obviously that he cares enough about her to go out of his way for the people she loves. Ugh. And when she suggests Roman going out into the field, he's so gentle and apologetic about why they can't allow that. And then he leaves her to take Roman back to the cell, showing trust in them both. Ugh. What a genius scene, to be so packed with meaning in such a short space of time. I also appreciate Roman trying to convince Jane to tell Weller the truth about Emma bc it’s the right thing to do (seriously woman he’s right, hurry up with that! I'm so annoyed about the lack of learning from past mistakes that's happening here like seriously this can only go badly ugh)

Wait Nas' source-phone is ringing?? Good thing she remembered the code phrase after all these months haha. Also considering that I'm still on the 'Remi was the source' bandwagon, I feel like this meet-up is a trap...

Naw Jeller walking to the lab together and then WAIT WHAT HE ASKED ABOUT THE DATE. Omg. The awkwardness level just shot through the roof (and probably continued up several floors) and Jane is staring at him bc lbr the ~thing~ between them is like the elephant in the room that goes carefully ignored and then suddenly he's asking about something that's directly elephant-adjacent and it's like is this really happening? and then she's still speechless and he assures her she doesn't have to talk about it with him (while looking like he's practically about to cry jesus christ what are you two doing to me) and then he tells her that her whole date thing got him ~thinking~ and her eyes go wide and she stops breathing because is he about to acknowledge the elephant and lbr she's so stunned at even the possibility that this could be happening but she's SO READY for it and ugh I bet her heart is racing rn and ugh ours certainly are because we're all like YES TELL HER ADMIT YOUR LOVE KISS HER KIIISSSSS HEERRRRRRR, and then--- "we need to be careful. Sandstorm is everywhee" and oh man. All that buildup just goes poof! and disappears. Goddammit, Weller, you stupid boy. Couldn't you see how loudly her eyes were screaming 'kiss me'?? Or maybe you could, and that's why you look so sad, because you believe that you two can/should never be together again. But more likely he just assumed that her stunned look was her being uncomfortable about discussing her love life with him. Ugh you two are IDIOTS. Idiots, I tell you. But lbr I do love the fact that Weller is telling her to stay away from Oliver to protect her, which I'm sure is entirely genuine-- or at least, he's convinced himself of that. I wonder if he's aware that he also just wants her far far away from any other man. And then omg Nas appears, interrupting their private moment (I love the look they exhange like they're not quite ready to let go of their connection just yet) and lol I just love that this single moment is like a total metaphor for Nas' involvement in this show, her very presence interrupting their progress back towards one another. Ugh. But anyway sidenote, it looks like when they head to the lab they actually all head back in the direction they had just come from in the first place?? Unless I got all turned around while I was focusing too closely on Jeller's intense eye contact lol, I mean that’s certainly a possibility

Anyhow they head into the lab and there's a conspicuous absence-- Reade is nowhere to be seen, which is no surprise to us, because that dude has become flakier than old paint, but it is to Weller, who has been a little too distracted in the recent weeks to have the team totally in grip like he used to. And luckily for Reade, he has Zapata to cover for him, who gives a hurried excuse of train delays. Ah, transport troubles. An oldie but a goodie. Patterson unwittingly helps by just getting straight down to business, directing all their attention to a photo of Jane's hip and thigh, meaning that they all have a clear view of the curve of her butt as well. I wonder if Jane is so used to this team seeing her body that she just doesn't even register the invasiveness of it anymore? Does Weller ever feel weird about looking so clinically and professionally at something that he would very much like to look at in a non-work setting?? But anyhow. I love that when Patterson's talking about the tattoo being a coin that has the date 1776, a hint of sarcasm creeps into her voice as she says 'the birth of our great nation'. I hope Ashley herself put that slight inflection (and social commentary) on it. Also yay Rich gets a small shoutout since he recognised the symbol from the center of the coin, which relates to some smuggler dude. I hope he’s happy back in whatever prison he’s in. And then there’s some complicated puzzle-solving involving another related tattoo that points them to some fancy medical clinic/heatlh spa thing. Jane reads the Greek off the tattoo because of course she can, and when she asks how it all ties together, Patterson quips, "It's all Greek to me!" and looks at big bro Weller with like an 'eh? eh??' expression. He's not amused, but dw Patterson, because we are. You're the cutest and it's great to see you getting your humour back. And then Weller decides they need to all split up-- a team to talk to some dude that has a connection to the smuggler, a team to check out the medispa, and a team to stay behind and coordinate everything and chase other leads as they arise. Naturally Patterson is the latter, and he pairs Jane and Tasha (yaaaaaasssss) to talk to the dude, but then rather than taking Nas with him to the medispa, he says he'll be taking Roman instead. I love that everyone's like 'whaaaaa?', especially us lol. And then he says that he got a call from Pellington threatening to give Roman to the CIA unless he starts giving them useful info and ugh I so want to know if that's true or if he just made it up so no one would try to fight him on his decision to take Roman on the mission?? Zapata's kinda against it but not firmly against it like she would have been a couple of weeks ago, and I'm super interested to see how she and Jane will work together given their conflicting opinions over Roman and their rocky relationship in the past. I have high hopes for some quality bonding time so please don’t let me down, show 

Ooh we're doing another timejumping episode like the college shooting one back in S1. Tasha is leaving a (well deserved) angry voicemail for Reade  while Jane delivers Roman to Weller and tells Weller to be safe out there. Which is her telling him to look out for both her brother and for himself and ugh I love being back to a place where these two are allowed to openly care about each other again rather than pretending like they don’t. And then naww speaking of caring, Jane checks to make sure Zapata is okay when she hears her sounding upset on the phone. Ugh yaaaayyy at them being friends aain. And then ugh they work together so well as they interrogate the prisoner guy (sidenote, I love the way Zapata says her own name. It’s hot.) and they're just so in sync and so great and just ugh. And then when they come out of the room Jane tentatively asks about Reade-- she knows something is going on and she wants to help because she cares. But she also knows that Zapata is protective of Reade and might push her away for pyring and ugh my little baby Jane just wants all of her family to be safe and happy and ughhhh she's the sweetest. I'm glad Zapata doesn't lash out, she just plays it off as no big deal, saying he just slept in. Jane knows it's not true but accepts it anyway (after making it clear she would help if help was needed). And then a new lead comes in and so they head out-- and omg Zapata is the one to reach out first, admitting it's kinda nice having Jane with her instead of Reade for a change, and then making sure she knows that she doesn't have anything against Roman anymore, she’s just worried about his former Sandstorm ties. Whaaaat. Zapata noticing that Jane is quiet/possibly upset and makes an effort to sort-of apologise to try to make her feel better? Amazing. And then Jane is honest with her about what's really bothering her-- that Weller (who is almost exclusively 'Kurt' to her these days ugh) warned her about trusting Oliver and risk of ties to sandstorm. And omg Zapata's immediate response is 'ooooh you're seeing someone?" and ugh I KNEW the ~supportive girlfriends~ connection between them was still in there. My beautiful supportive lady friends are back. She's happy for Jane, though she acknowledges that it's possible Weller has a point. And then omg they bond over the impossibility of having a life outside the job and Zapata tells Jane about her grandparents’ love story and how she has being single down to a science (me too girl, me toooo) and UGH THE BONDINGGGGGG THIS IS EVERYTHIG I'VE EVR WANTED. Anyway they arrive at the auction house place and tbh I love how small Zapata looks in this ep?? She's such a teeny pocket rocket haha. Then the blonde lady who just sounded very stressed on the phone shows them through to the back area (literally guys it's hard for anyone to believe that you're just two random peeps looking for a coin for Jane's 'dad'. You both have ~Badass Warrior Woman~ written all over you. But lucky they are so badass, because now they're in the middle of a gunfight. Which Jane has literally broguht a knife to. Help, I'm dying over the subtle comedic genius of this writing loll. Also Jane just used that knife to make a dude stab himself in the chest and then she threw him through a window. Good lord, have I mentioned lately how incredible this woman is?? Of course Zapata has held her own very well too, taking out the other dude with a crack shot before the two of them regroup and are like 'what the hell just happened??' lol

Oooh okay we've jumped back to 9am now, where a gorgeous woman is creeping out of Reade's coke-palace, while he pretends to be asleep til the door closes then groggily listens to Tasha's voicemail. Meanwhile, Patterson has been working hard because she's amazing and not flushing her life down the toilet despite the horrible things she’s gone through, and she cracks the tatt just as he gets there. She knows he's lying about his dentist appointment but she’s just like 'whatever bitch let's go, we got bad guys to hunt'. And then lol I love the fact that she's the one driving. She looks so tiny in this huge car. It's probably a good idea though-- are we sure he's sober enough to drive? But anyway she fills him in, and then gets interrupted by a call from Dr Sun, which makes me nervous. No one should be trusting Dr Sun ever. Therapy is great and I fully support it, but please honey go find a nice therapist faaaaaar removed from anything to do with Sandstorm or the FBI or Nas. Like how about my mother?? She'd love to go back to NYC for a while lol. But anyway I appreciate that Reade actually asks her how she's doing and genuinely cares about the answer. He might be living in an emotional trashcan at the moment but he still loves his team. But sigh, for a moment I was hopeful that Patterson's healthy approach to trauma would inspire him but instead he just tries to tell her she needs a night out. No Reade, your form of therapy is not good for anyone. Though I would be supportive of Patterson and Jane and Zapata having a nice little girls’ night in at some point... but anyway my genius baby can tell Reade's off but there's no time for that bc they're at the bad guy's house. But of course he walks up, talking on his phone to the blonde coin lady, just as they're at his door. So now we know who she was talking  to just as Jane and Zapata got there... Also man everyone's life would have been so much easier rn if this was the 80s and no one had mobile phones to coordinate with haha. Still, if Reade had been keeping a proper lookout... and then he gives chase and catches him, but somehow the guy mesmerises him with an emotional speech on hating himself and oh geez. Come on, Reade, you’re better than this. But nope, like an idiot he lowers his gun and is about to get shot when Patterson saves his ass (yeahhh, girl!). Back at the lab, he awkwardly thanks her and she responds by asking him if he's okay and trying to get him to get help with his problems. But of course he's not interested, and then someone comes and interrupts anyway, and now they have info on the smuggler person helping a cartel with something. Also lol Reade shows her a bill he found in that dudes apartment for some building, and its printed on perfectly clean, unfolded paper. Idk how you guys get your bills, but they sure don't look like that after being through the postal system. But anyway they send a raid on the building, finding a bunch of empty beds with handcuffs attached-- and then we see the people chained up in a van with the smuggler guy watching over them. Right, human trafficking it is...

Back to 9am (lol it's like a mini groundhog day for us) and Weller runs into Nas in the corridor, telling her to take backup to her meet while she's all 'yeah, nah' then tells him to watch his back with Roman. Bitch, he's much safer with Roman than he is with you! Ugh. And then Roman and Jane are in the elevator and he's so worried about letting Weller down and not remembering anything and being sent to the CIA and ugh my poor baby puppyyyy. And then naww Jane promises that she won’t let them take him away from her. Also it's interesting that the camera followed Jane there for a minute, showing us what we've already seen, rather than just following directly after Weller and Roman after Jane hands him over. Seemed kind of like unnecessary doubling up. But anyway ugh Roman and Weller getting into their cover outfits and talking about the plan and just overall working together and I'm so happy about it. But not as happy as I am about these GLASSES omg. Weller. Be still my heart. Lol but I’m laughing at “No weapon for me?" "Just act like you have one" bc now I'm picturing Roman with his hand hovering over his hip like a gunslinger, and like a balled up pair of socks shoved under his belt to make a bulge under his jacket hahaha. But then omg Roman thanks him for bringing him out and giving him a chance, and Weller says it's all about getting them closer to Shepherd so they can take sandstorm down and move on, but lbr that's only part of it. Part is that he feels for Roman and what he’s going through. And a big part is his feelings for Jane :P And aww I love that they made up a backstory for Roman, aka the bodyguard who is not even meant to speak. Who's gonna quiz him? Other than Weller, I mean lol. I love these two getting along. And lol "you're security, open the door" haha, he's already behaving like a pampered rich guy. Oooh this place has exactly the same security as the auction house, and the guy has the coin displayed on his desk?? Seems kinda arrogant when it's apparently the symbol of your shady dealings. And then Mr White Teeth gets all distracted by Roman's scar which is stupid bc he would never risk offending a rich client by wasting their time focusing on their bodyguard instead. And then Roman gets pissed and grabs him which earns them a timeout in the meditation room haha. A place that is clearly not very tranquil for Weller bc this time he's the one getting pissed and grabby-- and then Roman smugly presents the key-fob for the restricted area and Weller is all '...damn. I think I like this kid' lol. And then when they sneak into the area, Weller gets a call and the whole team does an adorable little conference call to update each other on what they've found out so far. While they're chatting Roman uses broken medical instruments to pick a lock on a cabinet and while that totally wouldn't work (trust me I'm a lockpick now lol) it's super cute that he opens it and then steps aside like it's an offering to Weller. And then he reappears a moment later with some medical files, allowing Weller to put together the answers-- that the cartel is trafficking people to be used as organ donors at this medispa. Then ta-da, the blonde woman appears, but by the time Roman and Weller get there, she's killed the doc and made a run for it. The badass bros-in-law chase her down and find her-- only to be tazed and kidnapped. Oops.

Back at the NYO, the team is set on finding the boys (especially Jane, which is unsurprising since it's the two people she loves most in the world). Nas has to go to meet her source and everyone is like "k, byeeee" and immediately forget about her the moment she leaves the room. Jane realises that the guy they interrogated earlier must know more than he let on so she and Tasha and Reade lean on him with their new info-- turns out his gf was doing all the trafficking stuff without his knowledge. I kinda feel sorry for the guy. Also I was gonna say he reminded me a little of Lin Manuel Miranda somehow and then I realised that it's because he's from Hamilton haha. Sigh, I will see it someday.... Anywho, he helps them by giving them a location where they can find the truck and therefore rescue the victims and their boys :)

Speaking of which, both Weller and Roman are chained up inside the truck with the others, and Roman is freaking out bc it's giving him flashbacks and ughhh Weller pulls him out of the memory and reassures him and ughhhhh my boys. And then the other prisoners help them figure out a way to escape and we find out Roman can speak Spanish bc he really is Jane’s brother (man I gotta start learning spanish so one day I can just randomly whip it out like that). Anyhow the team is at the site and are all spreading out ready to take down the bad guys and then ugh Jane sees Weller in the truck and there's a second of eye contact and then the team dives into a gunfight with the baddies (bc it's not Blindspot if there's not multiple epic showdowns per ep) and while they're engaged in that, Weller chases down the blonde and Roman goes for the smuggler, and Jane runs after them both bc she's gotta protect her boys. I love that Weller goes all Assassin's Creed and jumps from truck to truck, then pauses as he sees the blonde fleeing one way and Roman fighting a losing battle the other way-- so he directs Tasha and Reade after the woman and dives to Roman's rescue, shooting the bad guy a second before he cuts Roman's throat. And Jane is there a second later and ugh the fear in her voice as she yells Roman’s name and then ugh the way both she and Weller crouch over him ughhhh I know he's her brother but in a way they're both parent-figures to him and ugh I get emotional about it. Meanwhile Tasha and Reade are still searching for the blonde, who shoots Zapata in the freaking back, like seriously how dare she do that to my precious baby. Thank god she was wearing a vest. Reade is as pissed about it as I am, so he shoots the blonde in the back too which has just a hint of poetic justice to it tbh

Ughhhh Jeller finding each other in the hallway and she checks if he's okay and he immediately asks after Roman and she tells him that Roman's fine thanks to what he did (yes boy are you figuring out that the way back to this woman's heart is by caring about and protecting those she cares about?? Which includes yourself btw so no foolish business please). And then awwww he admits that he kinda enjoyed hanging out with Roman and he kinda likes him and she's THE CUTEST as she teases him about playing it cool so he doesn't come on too strong and ugh she jokes about it but I bet that his acceptance and liking of Roman means EVERYTHING to her. And then omg Weller brings up Oliver AGAIN (booooooiiiiii whatre u doingg) and then he tells her that though she should be careful she doesn't have to give up all aspects of her life for this fight and she's all 'so you think I should give him a chance?' (aka 'so you've definitely moved on then?') and he's all 'well that's up to you' (aka 'I literally want every man bar me to stay as far from you as possible but I can't even admit that to myself right now let alone to you so I'm gonna hedge hedge hedge') and then what the HELL is THIS bc he genuinely compliments her about always looking for the best in people and then says that it's ONE OF HIS FAVOURITE THINGS ABOUT HER. ONE OF MULTIPLE FAVOURITE THINGS. ABOUT HER. LORD SAVE ME FROM THIS HELL. AND UGH HER WHISPERED 'thank you' AND THE WAY HE SMILES AT HER WITH THE CRINKLY EYES AND THEN EVEN AS THEY WALK AWAY SHE LITERALLY PAUSES AND ALMOST TURNS BACK AND UGHHHHHH WHAT IS THIS BEAUTIFUL TORTURE I LOVE-HATE IT SO MUCH

Omg then the next thing Jane does is go to Tasha and ask for her help doing a background check on Oliver which is adorable and then they find out he changed his name (so he CHOSE the last name 'Kind'?? Literally what kind of damn pretentious... sigh nevermind) and Zapata tells her not to jump to conclusions about it and Jane just looks at her and is all 'would you' and she's all 'oh yeah' and ughhhhh these two cuties ughhh

Speaking of cute pairs, omg Weller is literally visiting roman in his cell with beers and asking him if he's okay and tells him he did good work and ugh they smile at each other and joke about the spanish thing and then Roman is honest about not wanting to remember the bad things he's done and ugh Weller shares some background on his shitty childhood and ugh LOOK AT THIS BONDING. LOOK AT IT, ANAKIN. And so clearly all the pairs are having a little post-mission ~moment~ rn bc now Patterson and Reade are talking in the locker room and firstly oooh Weller's having some drinks at his place tonight, I bet Jane is gonna be there. Ugh wait I wonder if that's why he brought the beers to Roman, bc he knows he couldn’t let Roman come but he wanted to share the moment with him somehow and ughhh help me. But anyway unlike the sweet bonding of the last two pairs, this is Patterson basically calling Reade out on his shit, which I am SUPER supportive of. Then he gets defensive and says she's being stupid, which I am not at all supportive of. But she ignores him and continues on, making it clear she knows what's going on. And omg she has a brother who's an addict and maaannn this is such fascinating backstory I want to hear 100% about this. But ugh then Reade gets even more defensive and basically tells her to shut up and bugger off and grrrr Reade I am really not a fan of you these days. I miss the Reade that was sweet and sassy and supportive and stupidly in love with Sarah Weller. I loved him, but I really don't like this guy much at all. Sigh.

Speaking of guys I don't like, Oliver shows up at Jane's apartment, and yet again when he speaks I'm reminded of that terrible terrible accent of his. But sigh I will acknowledge that he's kinda sweet and they are cute with their little hand-holding thing and whatever. But oooh she goes for it an asks him about the name change and he gets pisssssseeedddd. Lbr there's probably going to be some completely legit reason for it like he had a really terrible family situation or whatever, but lbr I don't really care bc it means it got him out of her apartment (a dinner-at-home date seems like the prime situation for some lovin', so I'm very glad that it crashed and burned lol)

Aaaand speaking of crashing and burning, the basically-forgotten Nas has reached her meet-point and is now being garrotted. Oh well. But then lbr we all know she doesn’t die so no point in getting excited. Er, I mean ‘worried’...               

[taiey]

The continuing adventures of “taiey writes liveblogs that probably only make sense with a transcript of the movie to line it up with”.

no peter please don't go after him

he really does get the most dramatic lines—ooh, green reflection in the window!

wow, that's. She really does ask for validation a lot of times

:((( this whole goblin kit thing is really elaborate? like, i thought you would've failed science. there is mechanical engineering. and chemical. for bombs.

That's a really, really stable spider web that is also flexible enough to support them without clinging, at that angle

[obligatory evil meteor mention]

Surprisingly evil-looking mail delivery guy! Uuunless you're her dad and you live here or. Oh, okay.

Oh, May.

But, like, no pressure or anything.

!!! her ring.

ahh evil evil scooter. of evil.

Harry this is not a good way to have an honest conversation. Stop punching your friend. No, I don't care that you're in costume, he's not, that makes it—DON'T STAB HIM!

I guess by the time your friend is yelling at you about his father, while wearing his green goblin costume and standing on his green goblin scooty-fly, it is acceptable to tell your friend his father was the green goblin, despite said father's dying request.

Dude! Attempts at vengeance on your best friend for murder of your father are NOT an excuse for massive property damage! I hope you pay for the repairs OH AND ALSO did no one get hurt by that massive shower of bricks onto a busy street??

"I'm still here! And now I have a lightsaber!"

oh no what if your new superpowers don't cover falling from heights? (I'm sure they do, I know he dies at the end of the movie.)

I wonder, again, if Peter took him out of the goblin costume first. like. awkward.

Wait, what? I thought when that guy jumped/fell out a window he died.

There's marshland in New York? With a terribly ill-secured particle physics laboratory?

OH MY GOODNESS YOU GUYS, YOU'RE TERRIBLE! you can't even check how much mass is in the reactor? How many birds with superpowers does New York have now?

Also awkward: imagine if those cops had gotten there slightly differently and fallen into the spinny thing toooo...

Go. See. Him. and hope maybe he doesn't remember you're spiderman if he doesn't remember you saved his liiiffffe  (oh, good.)

Hey, Peter, you maybe want to. idk. Tell MJ. Some relevant facts, about her friends and his father and.

yikes that's some horrifying sand movement. like. yeeesh no.

Oh... your hand cannot pick up your daughter's locket. :( —yes! go hand, reformed hand! Woohoo! :D

Hey, nice green-ing, sand. Good job. Stripy and everything.

Yeah dude no. Don't start talking about spidey now. The other stuff was kinda okay but not, well.

Okay so when there's a large metal beam swinging about nearby your window... maybe... not? with the walking towards it?

Man, what is wrong with this crane?

you did not pick a good guy to insult peter parker to, whatsyaname. eddy. Ed. idk.

“YOU TELL MY WIFE thank you.” heh. Slight, teeny, tiny, character development, I love.

He didn't see you there, I didn't see you with a camera. Where'd you get the camera from, Pete?

Ed. Shut up. He's paying you $50 for a front page shot, he does not value anything about you.

Like, that could be a conflict for Peter, ‘i could stage that and get a steady job’ buut I already know the plot of this movie and can kinda guess how Edward gets that shot.

That is an excellent Stan Lee cameo.

...how much... exactly... has harry lost of his memory... if he doesn't know he has money...

SUPER EVIL REFLEXES!!

...oh, Mary Jane.

...oh no don't you be jealous.

This'd be a really awkward parade thing if he decided to not in faaact show up oh no. Oh, no. Oh, man.

Wow, that sure is a conveniently placed "Sand & Stone" truck. Where'd you get that shovel?

Wow, bullets work surprisingly well considering he's made. of sand.

[obligatory note of happiness about the MJ&Harry bit. and. honesty.]

dude put yer mask back on

ehhhh look the thing about the humble never-asks-to-be-thanked thing is that it doesn't work when. this.

Oh my goodness he asks her? He suggests it?? Peter, no!

"No, Spider Man, no!" I relate to this kid.

like, i've seen gifs ofit, that shekissed him but i did not realise he aSKS HER TO

Yeah, same, Mary Jane!

haha but maybe this time mary jane won't be kidnapped

The sand is now driving a truck. Poorly.

Yeeeesh no, stop, no, ~sheriff~? You’re not.

tbh what if you just. Let him take the money. So much property damage going on here. So very much.

WHAT IF YOU DIDN'T KISS SOMEONE. WHILE PREPARING TO PROPOSE TO SOMEONE ELSE. WHAT. IF.

This guy... is gonna end up bringing you that ring at the worst possible moment during your inevitable argument. Isn't he. Isn't he, Peter.

You could also try telling him you got fired, MJ. He knows that feeling! Kind of.

...not that you should say that, Peter. 'cause it's kind of only kinda.

how have you not noticed how terribly your spider man/actress analogies go over. every single time.

Like in a literary sense it's kinda cool, there are parallels between their experiences, kinda... BUT NOT RIGHT nooow

shhuuuttt uppp (this is all like 5 seconds, i just keep. pausing.)

Hey, what could make Mary Jane feel worse right now? ENTER GWEN STACY.

ENTER GWEN STACY TALKING ABOUT HOW SHE KISSED SPIDERMAN

“Who kisses Spiderman?? :D” "Me. Most days. When I'm not mad at him for beiNG TERRIBLE."

I. I'm not sure. like. what the point of that question is. There is no good answer.

No. He did not, MJ. He had idea how it would make you feel, because BOY I DUNNO.

um. usher guy. no. SHE JUST LEFT, WHY WOULD YOU SEND THE CHAMpagne in anyway, whyy

Beep!

Oh, hey! I was right! That other guy did die, probably ...aand it wasn't your fault. technically.

We chased down the wrong guy?

Pfff.

Yeah so I think so far he really hasn't killed anyone. Not counting Norman or Ock on technicalities.

Does he feel guilty? About you or about... okay, don't say "I don't need you" to Mary Jane Watson. That's a bad idea.

The evil ooze has been hanging out in your bedroom for ?? weeks and it's only now that it attacks you? infects. thing.

"Hey, this was a lot quicker than last time I made a new costume."

Spiderman is just, like, an accepted traffic hazard by now, right?

Oh, I'm so glad he's being suspicious of the black goop.

...you're not a biologist, but you can recognise a symbiote on a molecular level in minutes when it's AN ALIEN.

dude please realise you look super evil now. even to —haha like you shouldn't smash people's cameras but also haha

"Little did Spiderman know, I have TWO cameras!"

OK I'll admit the black is legitimately good for hiding on dark ceilings

TRAIN ASSISTED WEB KICK!

oh gosh the body horror from this sand thing—hope that pipe wasn't important--ooh, water works.

...also hope this large tank of pressurised water isn't important and won't flood annnything else.

EVIL HAIR-PULLING-DOWN

...that's... kinda a valid point? but. I mean sure, he should fix the door, probably, just not being polite

Hey, Peter, you made a good decision! Nice! AND STAY OFF.

Aunt May isn't having any of this "murder can be good" stuff.

revenge == the symbiote ??

Waitress/Singer is a job? ...also maybe you should tell your boyfriend about thi—Harry paints? Cool!

(Does Harry know that MJ's dating Peter?)

Yell at people and they offer you oranges?

Hee Ursula! :D

He also cooks! And they dance!

M. J. Do not. Noooooo whyy

oh no. noo. different no. :((( no. Please, Harry. Keep your eyes off 'the ball' and ahhh—hey, there's that scene that wasn't in the VHS version.

Harry?? This is like 20% of the reason you wear a mask, dude!

whiiiplaaash oh my goodness ahh poor Mary Jane.

:((( see this is the kind of quality anguish you can get when you don't just discriminately kidnap, other supervillains take note

pete. pete. pe ter par ker. "I'm breaking up with you" is not. in fact. a good segue to "Let's get married"

Took them three movies but they finally made acting plot relevant. It's not! that hard!

AND THEN. YOU GO BACK TO PETER. AND PRETEND TO BE HIS AMNESIAC BEST FRIEND oh my goodness and then you use her omitive lie about the shoW AND THEN WE GO FULL SM1

“but. but she broke up with *you*, because she was in love with *me*. !!”

what. Why are. you winking?

Bright green coffee sign!

nooo. emotional anguish---->TERRIBLE LIFE CHOICES

Right, Harry, overall—because I mean high marks for ingenuity and not-kidnapping, but—you're really lacking on the follow through here, like for keeping up the act. And wow that is a lot alcohol in front of you.

Harry please notice the ominous black spidey suit. Please. Soon.

harry im not sure you've noticed but you have blades. on. ur arm.

Takes symbiote!Pete to point out the obvious: that Norman.didn't.deserve you.

Kinda funny how after all that the picture in question is not, in fact, of Peter actually doing anything wrong.

OH MY GOODNESS, IT'S PHOTOSHOPPED? IT'S not even actually symby-spidey?

Yeah, no, Ed. I can forgive a lot of things. But reposts with the watermarks edited out? Not that.

hahahah

Symby-Pete likes Ursula's food?   . . .ah

*hair flick*

water doesn't kill him forever. :o

OH MAN PETER NO.

symbiote-Pete spends money recklessly.

Oh man, Gwen is so nice.

...alien meteor ooze teaches you to play jazz piano? ...and dance?

blonde hair and the black headband and their clothes and his hair and her earrings... it's a Look.

GWEN STACY IS SO NICE! ("That was all for her? I'm so sorry.")

NO.

get. out.

geddoouutt

"Who are you?" "Well, Mary Jane, I reckon I'm the exact feeling of a church spire silhouetted against the storm clouds, as lightning crashes in the background."

okay so eddy, brocky, rock boy. don't pray to God to kill people. Don't... don't do that.

How. Exactly. Do you recognise the face of a guy you barely know, four floors up, while he's tearing an alien ooze suit off his skin.

oh no his hair's still black

Continuing adventures of That Awful Door.

I hope Aunt May knows he's Spider man, because otherwise there is just waaay too much backstory to explain here.

I think she also wants him to keep the ring so she doesn't have to wear it.

“Spiderman... didn't have those teeth last time... right?”

Maybe not? with the watching her through her window? Also considering last time your saw her in person you hit her maybe not do that first part in person, perhaps.

"On Broad-way."

...you also locked the normal one away? Or, no, that was earlier this night. You just were using the evil one, and stowed that away. ok. gotcha.

Harry! Harry, you could do. a good. ...oh no. peter don't come also what happened to his face??

:(((

OH MAN. BERNARD! i don't think this is gonna work. but. thank you. for. saying that. [it worked!:D]

what happened to your face do you still have superpowers if you're not healing.

It's the real spiderman! He stopped in front of an american flag for a sec!

this reporter overuses the word 'seemed'

Brick!

you're stiiilll fallling

Listen MJ most of the webbing is really strong, you can actually move along it and even if you fall through one level you've got a decent chance of catching the next.

this reporter is so alarmist. and that one.

Goblin bomb!

"I'm not here for you~"

Burn it & smash it! :D

That kid is awesome! ("Film's extra.")

or. you could. shoot web. and not. jump. And maybe get her down somehow? Ground level would be... safer... lotta floors, elevators proabably not working...

why did that work?

ohh. noise.

oh... kay...

[tragic backstories make everything better]

i f o r g i v e y o u .. ..

i like to think he becomes also a superhero. subtler. smaller. never quite noticed, but. bit by bit.

why in the world is gwen at harry's funeral

(mj you do in fact have a job. and. a song to finish singing. um. but anyway)

"Girl at the final battle" yes. Her. Excellent.

The credit songs this time are so... gentle...

(Balance of probabilities Harry died intestate but maybe he drew up a will at some point when he liked Peter and didn’t revoke it and then they can go help Marko’s daughter, perhaps? Maybe.)