#you know how much rpf i can fit in THIS bad boy

[valyrfia]

not the FIA mandated community service

[brandogenius]

could you write something about Julien comforting the reader if the reader's family isn't supportive of their relationship?? ❣️

‼️RPF‼️

please take note there may be elements of homophobia here!! as a precaution

BLURB - julien x reader. - unsupportive family

- when invited to your house to meet your parents for dinner, jb was really excited. she wanted to make a good first impression. “should i wear a tshirt or a suit? or-“ you just shrugging, a little nervous “whatever you want baby, it’s just dinner at my parents house”

- your parents were always hmmm questionable. having a bit of different views compared to you. you thought it was ok however. especially when they would ask about your day and the boys. maybe they changed their mind ? maybe it’s ok now?

- “i can hear those thoughts from the other side of the room. princess it’ll be fine. one bad thing from their mouth and we can leave”

- both of you hand in hand walking up the driveway to your parents house. knocking on the door, your mother opens it. her smile fading away as she sees the two of you standing there. hand in hand

- clearly tensions were THICK. it was clear as day. being brought to the table, plates were set out. you were about to sit down next to julien but your mother took the seat. making you have to sit across from them.

- julien noticed immediately and stood up, going to the other side of the table to sit with you

- the two of you trying to be normal and eat the dinner but your parents just keep staring at the two of you

- “is there a problem?” julien looking up. both of you holding hands underneath the table

- your mom giving a weird look and sighing like “i just…didn’t expect you to look very masculine. you have a lot of tattoos” and juliens like oh no here we go ok. you having to hold onto her hand tightly afraid she might leap across the table

- julien going like “maybe so, but a lot of them are very meaningful to me” and you just glaring across the table at your parents.

- your mom would start picking out every small detail. from what julien wore to how she did her hair. “you’re a woman. you don’t even wear makeup!”

- at this point julien is a brave saint. with how much patience she has you don’t even know. angry tears forming as you stand up

- “why can’t you be proud of me? why can’t you be happy i’m in a relationship? why do you feel the need to belittle and judge someone because they don’t fit into what you think is acceptable?!”

- at this point you were tired, upset and annoyed. you just wanted to go home. going outside and into the car. you weren’t even shocked to know your parents didn’t even try and explain themselves. both of you left in a fit of anger.

- you breaking down sobbing. feeling guilty because julien was so excited to meet your parents. “sweetheart. hey- no listen to me” pulling over she hugs you tightly, cupping your face. “i was excited to meet your parents. but holt shit- fuck them. i wanted to give them the benefit of the doubt. especially considering you told me a lot of the shit they said previously.”

- reassuring you it’s ok, julien brushing some hair out of your face, wiping the tears from under your eyes with the pad of her thumb. it was quiet, apart from the occasional sniffle from you or sigh from julien

- jb suggesting sometime maybe going to visit her parents another day. you met her parents and they were as lovely as ever.

- you decide to go home for the night. having a well deserved relaxed bath. you end up blocking your parents on most social media’s. it wasn’t worth the stress. wasn’t worth the insults thrown at you at the table earlier

[logan-lieutenant]

i feel so high school (au) pt 2. charlos

anyway here are some high school aus for my fav f1 rpf ships and an exploration of who knows how to ball, and who knows aristotle

(based on american high school setups cause of the song)

theatre kid!charles/stage crew!carlos: probably goes without saying but carlos knows how to ball, charles knows aristotle (though maybe not in the traditional sense). so here we’ll have carlos as the stereotypical jock, plays like four sports and is the team captain in all of them, lowkey giving frat boy energy and is honestly the only reason the school has won a game in the last four years. he’s probably known for being the only guy who’s both like a jacked up gym-is-life bro and also an utter gentleman, he’s always the one holding open doors and giving up his seat. and he’s usually pretty quiet/disengaged but if anyone disrespects a female teacher you know for a fact he’s death staring them into a puddle until it stops. the only fight he’s ever gotten into was with a guy who was harassing a girl at a dance and wouldn’t let her go when she tried to pull away.

charles is like the school heartbreaker, because he can never seem to make a relationship work no matter how many times he tries… and it seems like he’s a player and he’s got a different girl every week which isn’t entirely false but he also just doesn’t know how to say no to anyone which is the root of the problem. anyway so yeah i’m making charles a theatre kid, like one who can fit pretty much any role but he prefers the classics (he’s the kind of guy who knows a shakespeare quote for pretty much any situation). he usually gets cast as the love interest whether he wants the role or not but he does get a lot of stage time which he’s happy with. he’s way more comfortable on stage than when he’s actually with people, and his looks get him pretty far but in reality he’s just really awkward and kind of shy and gets flustered so easily.

carlos is on stage crew because he needed to fill the “arts/language” requirement to graduate and stage crew counted as performing arts even though it’s all behind the scenes. so he’s there almost every day, spending more and more time as the shows approach helping build sets and man the ropes and (insert lots of other cool and technical stage crew activities here). so even they know of each other this is the first time their paths really cross and they meet.

this is going to be the most cliche romance ever. charles having breathless pearl-clutching moments of gay panic when carlos gets paint all over his shirt and stops to take it off, or lifts giant sandbags or ladders or planks around like they don’t weigh anything. except ofc charles is way too shy to say anything or make any kind of initiative move so he just finds excuses to stay longer after rehearsals, maybe he starts helping paint the sets/designs cause he’s not bad at visual arts (emphasis on alternate in this alternative universe). bonus if he makes friends with one of the stage crew girls and all of the sudden he’s got a new handler (“look around twink! everything in this office is either dead or dying even the therapy dog killed itself”) who is constantly rolling her eyes at BOTH of their inability to take a hint

this would be the kind of hc that involves dressing rooms and unexpected moments behind curtains etc.

[tickle-bugs]

feel like shit just want them back <3

[thefanficmonster]

When You Put It Like That

Corpse Husband x Reader (Female)

Warnings: Swearing

Genre: FLUFF, Humor, RPF (Real Person Fic)

Summary: After a long time of trying to convince the angel-like Y/N to utter a single bad word, Corpse’s attempts are finally met with success but not the way he expected.

Requested by Anon. Hi hun! Thank you so much for this fluffy request, it was a ton of fun to write! I’m so sorry it’s taken me so long to complete and post it but here it finally is and if you happen to come across it and read it, I hope you enjoy the experience hehe. Love, Vy ❤

“Wait, wait, wait, what did I miss?“ I say as I hop into the Discord call and the Among Us server, running five minutes late since I got carried away reading my chat. My fans tend to do that to me - make me lose track of time and everything else. That’s why I usually try to connect to the call and game before I turn to look at my chat. Unfortunately, I forgot that bit today.

“Omg, Y/N! Put the cat ears on! It’s for the greater good, just trust me!“ Rae commands urgently. Amusingly enough, in the background, muffled a little by her voice is Corpse’s, telling me not to.

“Not that I need a reason to wear cat ears...“ I trail off, equipping the cat ears both in-game and IRL. Yes, I own a pair of cat ears, is that so surprising? “But can someone fill me in on what’s happening?“

“’Cat girls are ruining my life’ just surpassed twenty million views on YouTube, so we’re celebrating! And Mr. Popular Pants over here keeps being a party pooper, saying it’s not a big deal and refusing to put on cat ears.“

That’s when I notice that Corpse’s avatar is the only one wearing a different accessory than the rest of us. It’s this kind of tantrum-throwing-toddler that gets me laughing my butt off every single time. Add to it the witty sibling banter between him and Rae, fun for the whole family. Well, ok, not quite for the whole family with the curse words they sometimes drop left and right.

Speaking of cursing, I don’t do it. I was raised in a household where a curse word would earn me and my siblings a punishment - always different and never not creative but most importantly - always intense enough to make us regret saying a no-no word with our parents or grandparents around. That’s kind of stuck with me and I can’t really get over it. Even when I’m upset, the first thing that comes out of my mouth is that censor word YouTubers use to not get demonetized. I’ve been using those words all my life: shoot, freak, frick, crap, darn etc. - so my channel is always kept kid-friendly in that aspect.  Now with that context in mind, you’ll understand better the shock I received for this next move I made.

“Corpse, Corpse darling, listen to me. It’s not a big deal, it’s a HUGE deal. Don’t play the humble card with us, we know you too well. Allow us to be as excited as you were when you find out!“ I start off sweetly enough, “Sounds good?“

Corpse hesitates for a second, mumbling something under his breath before replying, “Ok, I guess.“

“Great!“ I clap my hands together, “Then put on the fucking cat ears!“

To say everyone in the call, especially Corpse, is stunned would be an understatement. Hell, I’m even stunned for a second or two, my eyebrows raising at my own out of character words. And, as a person who’s only cursed a countable-on-the-fingers-of-one-hand times in her life, boy did it feel freeing and relieving. Why haven’t I been doing it sooner, for fuck’s sake?!

This must be a huge success for everyone present, once again - especially for Corpse who’s been trying to get me to curse basically since the start of our friendship. He seems too shocked to even claim and flaunt his win over my willpower to keep my language clean, which I honestly appreciate.

“Well, when you put it like that...“ He finally mutters, his voice barely reaching me through the ‘oh my Gosh‘ squeals from Rae, Poki, Lily and Leslie who never thought their tries would lead to success. On the screen, I watch as his little black colored avatar equips the famous cat ears, “...How could I possibly complain?“

“Hell fucking yeah!“ I shout, clapping my hands together, “Wooo fucking hooo!“

“Ok, how the hell are we gonna stop her now? Is there a switch we can flip?“ Toast asks, faux concern in his voice.

“Shut it, Toast. I’ve worked far too hard to have her going back to being an angel!“ Corpse retorts, sending me and the rest of the players in a fit of laughter.

It’s true! He’s been working hella hard to get at least one curse word out of me, bribing me with immunity, threatening to kill me first in Among Us, offering an alliance or being my bodyguard or whatever else I could possibly fall for.

Hey, at least I didn’t get bribed into it, right?

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[green-blue-heller]

Look What You Made Me Do (Cockles FanFic)

Title: Look What You Made Me Do

Pairing: Cockles (Jensen x Misha)

Fandom: Supernatural RPF

Rating: GA

A/N: Part of my 500 follower celebration. This was based off a prompt by @dolphindiluna.

If you want to send me a prompt based on the theme, coming out, check out my pinned post.

Words: 2729

Read on AO3

Jensen stood on the stage, Robbie and the boys of Louden Swain behind him, music pumping into his earbuds as he smiled at the roaring crowd. A wave of panic filled him as the opening notes of his intro music sent the crowd into a frenzy, and he tried to swallow the lump in his throat.

In the back of his mind, there was a voice screaming at him to turn around and leave the stage as quickly as he could. That would be the smart thing to do. Especially since his stunt was about to lead to career suicide.

But as he glanced to his right, he caught sight of Misha and the smile on the other man’s face took his breath away. With a shy smile, he looked down at his feet for a moment.

You can do this, Jackles.

It wasn’t a spur-of-the-moment decision that brought him up on stage during the con’s Saturday Night Special.

It started out as something he wanted to do for Misha. Which was totally the wrong reason to want to do this. But he’d had such a hard time after the show ended.

Truthfully, he’d been having a hard time the last couple of years, and Jensen knew he hadn’t made things easier. Misha had never shied away from his sexuality, while Jensen had still very much been in the closet except for a few close friends.

But the whole Destiel thing had been like watching a trainwreck you just couldn’t look away from. The network and studio handled things badly and forced Misha to take the brunt of it, even though it wasn’t anywhere near the scope of his responsibility.

But he did it.

And Jensen hated it.

There had been a few bigwigs in charge who hadn't known but highly suspected that Jensen and Misha had been an item. It wasn’t like they really hid it on set, but they didn’t flaunt it either.

Misha called their remarks whenever they were on set or at a con, a microaggression.

Jensen took his word for it, as he really had no clue, other than that Misha meant it was homophobic, even if they didn’t seem to be on the surface.

So, he wanted to do something for Misha. To show him that he was loved and appreciated. And that he was committed to him, even with the show being over.

Misha and Danneel were his forever. And he never wanted either of them to forget it.

He had spent long hours over the last couple of weeks leading up to Vegas Con, talking it out with not just Misha, but with Danneel and even Vicki. They, along with the kids, were his life. And he would never make a rash decision, especially a possibly life-altering one, without consulting them first.

But they understood what he wanted. And what it could mean for all of them.

And they were all ready to stand by his side, no matter what he chose.

So, two months after he first got that cursed idea, he found himself on stage, in Vegas for the first time since the show wrapped up.

What a clusterfuck that had been. He knew it was bad as soon as it had been pitched. There were too many ways that things could go wrong by the time they got to the finale. And boy, did they ever go wrong.

Not that he was against Dean and Cas ending up together.

Jensen snuck another peek at Misha and smiled to himself. No, he definitely did not mind Dean and Cas ending up together. They deserved to be as happy as he and Misha.

The only problem was that, as he suspected, by the time push came to shove, no one was able to pull the trigger.

They’d cocked the gun and pointed it, had Cas confess, but then the execs at the studio were on edge over the dailies they’d been sent. With a global pandemic knocking on their door, they were afraid to go with anything but sticking to the status quo.

Except the show had been anything but status quo for quite some time. They were just too slow to realize.

He knew some of it was personal bias but that most of it was business. Though they managed to screw up even that.

But he was at the con, and he was going to do what he could. For everyone involved who deserved some vindication. They deserved to know they weren’t crazy.

Jensen took a deep breath and looked out at the crowd and gave them the most charming Dean Winchester smile he could manage.

And it sent them wild.

“Hey, guys!” When the crowd cheered their own greeting back at him, Jensen grinned.

With another deep breath, he steeled his nerves and mentally nudged himself forward. This had been his idea, and he still knew and agreed that it was the best idea, but that didn’t make him any less nervous.

Especially since he knew he was about to piss off the studio execs who were footing a large portion of the bill for his and Danneel’s production company.

He was almost certain he could kiss that goodbye.

“Look, I know there has been a lot of discourse since the show ended, and even more questions. I wish I could give you all the answers you’re looking for, but I hope that tonight, we can clear some things up.”

He knew it wasn’t a lot, but he wanted to be able to give the fans as much as he could, as much as he was comfortable with.

“Wow,” he said with a chuckle. “I haven’t been this nervous up on stage in a long time.”

He grinned at Rob as the music morphed and the opening bars to a Taylor Swift song kicked into his ears.

Part of him felt stupid. This was a stupid song for him to sing. But it was fitting.

He didn’t like to be backed into a corner, nor did he like his loved ones to be put into uncomfortable positions. And that had happened with most of them since their twelve-to-fifteen-year tenure on Supernatural ended.

Jensen knew he made a lot of mistakes in the last decade, and tonight he planned on correcting some of them.

A cleansing breath went through his lungs as he caught sight of Misha again, who flashed him a grin and a thumbs up.

He could do it.

He needed to do it.

Misha deserved it.

Jensen deserved it.

Their wives deserved it.

He opened his mouth and as soon as he started to croon out the first line, his voice low and smooth like a fine whiskey, the fans erupted into such a frenzy. Jensen thought might never stop grinning.

“I don't like your little games

Don't like your tilted stage

The role you made me play of the fool

No, I don't like you

I don't like your perfect crime

How you laugh when you lie

You said the gun was mine

Isn't cool, no, I don't like you”

As Jensen finished the first verse of the song, he felt his confidence grow. He’d practiced - a lot. He knew what he was doing and he trusted the band to be there for him and back him up as they’d rehearsed.

They’d smoothed out some of the music, made it more fitting to his vocal style, and the crowd erupted as the music morphed into what was more likely to resemble a 90’s rock ballad than a Taylor Swift song.

In the back of his mind, he thought it was a little sacrilege, but he’d never admit it out loud.

“But I got smarter, I got harder in the nick of time

Honey, I rose up from the dead, I do it all the time

I got a list of names, and yours is in red, underlined

I check it once, then I check it twice, oh!

Ooh, look what you made me do

Look what you made me do

Look what you just made me do

Look what you just made me-

Ooh, look what you made me do

Look what you made me do

Look what you just made me do

Look what you just made me do”

Jensen soon found himself bopping his head along with the crowd.

With a grin, he turned and strode over to Rob, who shook his head with a hearty laugh.

“I don't like your kingdom keys

They once belonged to me

You asked me for a place to sleep

Locked me out and threw a feast (what?)”

This was it.

His moment.

Their moment.

Jensen is no longer looking at the crowd. He’s all but forgotten there is even anyone else there as he continues to sing without even thinking about it.

How could he think, when he found himself lost in the perfect storm of those blue eyes that stared back into his green ones?

He moved with purpose as he marched across the stage.

“The world moves on, another day another drama, drama

But not for me, not for me, all I think about is karma

And then the world moves on, but one thing's for sure

Maybe I got mine, but you'll all get yours”

And in one swift motion, he pulled Misha, who had taken his outstretched hand, and pulled him out on the stage and Rob picked up the vocals and sang the chorus.

They had taken a few steps back when they let go and Jensen’s hand reached up to cup Misha’s face while his left hand, which still had his microphone, snaked its way under his boyfriend’s arm and wrapped around his back.

Jensen gently pulled Misha against him, who complied, putting both his hands on Jensen’s hips as their lips met and lazily molded together.

They fit perfectly.

Kissing Misha wasn’t even something Jensen had to think about, it just came as naturally as kissing Danneel.

He was sure the crowd was going crazy, but all he could hear was the whimper he elicited from his boyfriend as their lips parted and Jensen’s tongue caressed Misha’s.

“But I got smarter

I got harder in the nick of time (nick of time)

Honey, I rose up from the dead

I do it all the time (I do it all the time)

I got a list of names, and yours is in red, underlined

I check it once, then I check it twice, oh!”

Jensen pulled away, hand sliding down to Misha’s shoulder, breathless as always when Misha is near.

“I love you, babe,” Jensen whispered as he looked into Misha’s shining eyes that threatened to spill tears. Because even though he knew what Jensen was planning, it was real, at that moment, and Jensen could see that it was hitting Misha harder than he could have imagined.

His heart swelled as he moved his hand from cupping Misha’s shoulder to wrap around the back of his neck and pull him into a hug.

As he turned their bodies to face toward the crowd, Jensen smiled, his own teary eyes taking in the crowd that had gone wild, and dropped a soft kiss onto the top of Misha’s head.

With a grin, he stepped back and glanced over his shoulder to see Rob grinning at him. He threw the other man a wink as he gave a nod of appreciation for all his support and love not only given to him, but to Misha.

As he turned his gaze back to the crowd, a wicked grin spread across his face as he tilted his head at Misha, who was still securely snuggled into his side, and brought the microphone back to his mouth.

“Ooh, look what you made me do

Look what you made me do

Look what you just made me do

Look what you just made me-

Ooh, look what you made me do

Look what you made me do

Look what you just made me do

Look what you just made me do”

Jensen couldn’t help but chuckle into the microphone as he caught Misha’s eye roll. Of course, the older man thought he was being over the top and more protective than he needed to be. But he also knew how much it meant to him.

The look in his eyes, at the unshed tears and the smile that went on for miles, was all Jensen needed at that moment.

He knew he made the right decision. His family was more important than some job. There were plenty of things he could do besides acting or having a production company, if it actually came to that.

There was the Family Business Beer Company, there was Radio Company, not to mention the profits they turned from renovating houses and flipping them. And it wasn’t like the studio or network could now retroactively go back and undo the contract he already had for residuals from the show.

Jensen tried to swoop in and steal a kiss, but Misha let out a shy laugh and playfully pushed his face away as he gave one of his patented not-so-subtle winks. He immediately found himself letting out a chuckle as he let his arm fall from Misha’s shoulder and took a step forward, really paying attention to the crowd for the first time.

They were on their feet still, and going wild. All the bright lights from the cameras snapping pictures was a little much, especially since there wasn’t supposed to be flash photography, but he couldn’t find it in him to complain about anything at the moment.

As the bridge was about to kick in, he motioned with his hand for the crowd to join him.

“I don't trust nobody and nobody trusts me

I'll be the actor starring in your bad dreams

I don't trust nobody and nobody trusts me

I'll be the actor starring in your bad dreams

I don't trust nobody and nobody trusts me

I'll be the actor starring in your bad dreams

I don't trust nobody and nobody trusts me

I'll be the actor starring in your bad dreams”

He was grinning like a loon as he dropped his arm to his side, but he really didn’t care. Especially as he made his way back over to Misha and slid his hand home within Misha’s. They were a perfect fit.

“(Ooh, look what you made me do)

(Look what you made me do)

(Look what you just made me do)

I'm sorry

But the old Jensen can't come to the phone right now

Why? Oh, 'cause he's dead (oh)”

He knew he’d get in trouble for it later, but with a dramatic flourish, Jensen held his arm out in front of him and let the mic fall to the stage.

What were they going to do? Fire him?

As Jensen stared into the endless pools of Misha’s blue eyes, he didn’t really care what they did anymore.

He was going to do what he wanted, what felt right . And not let anyone else tell him differently.

And at that moment, all he wanted to do was kiss Misha.

His movement caught the other man by surprise, as he reached over and put one hand behind his back, and one behind his head, and gave him a slight dip before he leaned down and claimed his lips.

When they came up for air, they didn’t even realize there was anyone else in the room. They only had eyes for each other as they reached for each other at the same time, took each other’s hand, and walked off the stage as Rob and the band finished out the song.

Ooh, look what you made me do

Look what you made me do

Look what you just made me do

Look what you just made me-

Ooh, look what you made me do

Look what you made me do

Look what you just made me do

Look what you just made me do

Ooh, look what you made me do

Look what you made me do

Look what you just made me do

Look what you just made me-

Ooh, look what you made me do

Look what you made me do

Look what you just made me do

Look what you just made me do

If you want to be added or taken off my tag list, please let me know either in the comments or via a DM.

@dolphindiluna @kristina710

[crashdevlin]

Another Second Chance 1- Black Hole

Another Second Chance Masterlist,  Happily Ever Eventually Masterlist

Author’s Note: The final (hopefully) installment of the Happily Ever Eventually RPF series.

Summary: It's been five years since Jensen broke Y/n's heart and she's avoided him completely, but avoidance only lasts so long.

Pairing: past Jensen x Reader

Word count: 2302

Story Warnings: past cheating, little bit of background angst, mostly no warnings.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Things change. Either gradually or in catastrophic leaps, things change. Fact of life, unfortunately. Songs have been sung, books have been penned, movies have been made, all centered around that single inarguable fact.

When I was a younger woman, I thought that nothing really ever changed, that the facts of my life were that I was weak and stupid and I was always going to be in love with people who didn’t want me and were too good for me, that I was going to be miserable and alone forever. I was certain that I was the same person at 26 that I was at 16 and that’s just how things were always going to be.

I can honestly say, at 34 years old, I’m a different woman than I was at 16 or 26 or 30...and I may be alone, but I am not miserable.

I’m successful. I’m happy. I have friends and I have fans. I am well-rounded and, despite a hundred things working against me, well-adjusted. I’ve learned that I don’t need to be dating someone to be happy. In fact, without all the drama surrounding me whenever I do date someone, I’m happier. I have my children and I have my friends and I am happy. 2025 is shaping up to be one of my best years yet and I am ecstatic to see where it leads.

I’m sitting at my computer when my phone goes off. I don’t recognize the number so I Google it. King Woods Private School, the school Jensen wants to send Mav to. Weird that they’d call me when Jensen has primary custody. I answer immediately. “Hello?”

“Is this Miss Y/l/n? Maverick Ackles’ mother?”

“Yes, I am.”

“Hi, Ma’am. I’m Caroline Smith, Dean of Admissions for King Woods Private School. Your son’s father applied to our institution for the Fall semester for Kindergarten.”

“Oh, yeah. He told me. Said his father is very excited to get him in there.”

“His father didn’t tell you?”

“Mav’s nanny mentioned it, too, but...Jensen and I-”

“Had a very public falling out a few years ago, we’ve done our research,” she interrupts me. “But the thing is, King Woods is a very family-oriented institute and we need both parents to participate in all activities like monthly PTAs and volunteer nights. We need to make sure that both active parents can work together amicably. On that note, we have an admissions interview with little Maverick on Friday and we require your presence. Can you make it? 10:30 am.”

“Ten-thirty on Friday? Y-yeah. I can...I can totally do that. I will...see you then, Mrs. Smith.”

“See you then, ma’am. I’m looking forward to meeting you and your son. Goodbye.”

“Goodbye.” I set my phone to the side of my laptop and take a deep breath. Jensen and I haven’t been in the same room since NolaCon 2020. We’ve emailed a few times, but haven’t even spoken on the phone...in several years...and that’s better. It’s better for everyone if we don’t talk because then we don’t argue and we don’t fall into patterns that leave us in bad shape.

But for Maverick’s future, for Maverick’s good, I will have to do it.

I call Misha. He encourages me and tells me it’ll be okay. He supports me. He’s an amazing friend, has been for years, one of the few I got in the breakup. Most of our friends specifically didn’t take sides. Kim and Briana and Misha, they sided with me...the girls a little more vocally than Meesh, but it ended up a small rift between Misha and Jensen. I put an end to J2M and it hurts a bit when I think about it. They still talk sometimes but nothing like they used to.

Jared still talks to me every once in a while, but he sided with Jensen. Of course he did. Jensen’s his brother. But Jared tries to keep me involved in his life, he tries to stay a friend...but he’s Jensen’s first, always has been.

“It’s gonna suck,” I say, shaking my head.

“Yeah. But still. You gotta do it, right?” Misha says and I chuckle. To the point with Mr. Collins.

“Yeah. I gotta do it. It’s just...I haven’t seen him in years. I mean...except pictures on Instagram. It’s gonna be weird.”

“You know what I say about weird, right?”

“Yeah. But this isn’t the GISH and Random Acts kinda weird, this is...a pit in my stomach that feels like a bowling ball and a fear of reversion to the person I was in the past kinda weird.”

“You’ve grown too much to revert and that bowling ball will go away when you get comfortable again.”

“That’s…that’s the problem. What happens if I get comfortable with him again, Misha?” I’m scared of it. “He’s like this black hole that sucks me in every time and the only way I’ve been able to stave off the destruction of my universe these last five years is to keep my distance. I don’t know what to do when I’m in close proximity to the black hole.”

“You can do this, Y/n. You won’t have any problems...and maybe Jensen’s grown over the last five years, too.”

“Well, you’ve talked to him more than I have. You’d know how much growing he’d done.”

“Yeah, but it’s not like we’re spending all our time together anymore.”

I nod. “So...hope for the best, that he’s grown and things will be okay, and keep my distance from the dark vortex.”

“Exactly.” Misha smiles and looks directly at the camera. “You got this.”

Yeah, I do. I got this.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I wear an embroidered black silk Joanna Mastroianni dress to the interview. Not a lot of makeup, but enough to accentuate my features. I keep my hair out of my face and I wear sensible, cute shoes. I look good, but not like I’m trying to look good. I look like I’m trying to look presentable and classy for the people in charge of my son’s education.

I make it to the school first and I sit in a plush chair in the waiting room and wait with my legs crossed neatly to the side. I pull out my phone and start playing a game of Solitaire.

“Mommy!” Maverick’s voice pulls my attention away from the Seven of Hearts that is stuck behind the Six of Diamonds that is arresting my forward momentum in the game. I smile as he runs at me, full-speed, and I slip my phone in my purse as he throws his arms around my neck. “I missed you!”

“I missed you too, Mav!” I exclaim. I lean back and look into the beautiful green eyes he inherited from his father. “Have you been having fun with Daddy?”

“Yes! All the time!” Mav says.

He turns his head to look at the door to the lobby as Jensen walks in. Holy shit. He let his hair grow out a bit...little longer than when he was playing a demon. It's multi toned, what would be called 'Salt and Pepper' in any other man, but it looks more like 'Walnut and light Roux' on him. He's rocking his ginger beard and it has some actual salt in the color. He's wearing a blue suit...a masterpiece tailored to take away your breath. The man knows how to make an entrance.

He's still gorgeous...and I’m still stuck on him. Fuck.

I stand and take Mav’s hand as Jensen steps closer. I focus on his forehead. I can’t look at those eyes. I can’t look at those lips or those freckles on his cheeks. Forehead is safe. He tucks his hands in the pockets of his slacks and licks his lips. “Hi,” I greet him, and my voice sounds awkward, too high-pitched.

“Hey,” he responds and oh, God, that voice.

Breathe. Stay away from the singularity, avoid being pulled into the black hole. “You doin’ good?”

He nods. “Yeah. You?”

“Just fine.” Dying, being sucked into a vortex in space.

He opens his mouth like he’s gonna say something else when a tall brunette woman in a smart pantsuit walks out of the office. “Mr. Ackles? Miss Y/l/n?” We nod as she drops to kneel in front of Mav and me. “And this must be little Maverick.”

Mav turns and hides his face in my skirt. “Sorry. He’s a little shy around new people. He’ll warm up to you.”

“It’s okay. It’s natural.” She stands and extends her hand to me and then Jensen, shaking our hands. “Good to see you both here. So, we’re going to take Maverick in and watch him play a bit, get a sense of his social and developmental placement and if he’s a good fit for King Woods, then we will make that happen.”

Jensen and I nod, then I gently pull Mav away from my legs. “You’re gonna go with the nice lady and play with some toys, answer some questions, okay? You can rock that, right, buddy?” Mav nods and smiles at me and Jensen.

“And you two will be just fine out here together, right?” Mrs. Smith says. She’s making sure we won’t freak out on each other. Freaking out on each other is not the problem.

“Of course we will,” Jensen answers. “We’re gonna park ourselves right here in these chairs and wait for you to tell us how brilliant our boy is.” He winks at the woman and she swoons a bit...I have to stop myself from doing the same as I step back toward the chair I was sitting in before. She offers Maverick her hand and he looks back at me before he takes it and follows her as she leads him away toward a playroom. I play with the hem of my dress for a few moments as Jensen takes the seat next to me, his bowlegs stretching out in front of him a bit. “So...listened to that cover album you did...with, uh, Rob, Rich, and Mark. It came out real good. ‘A Little Dive Bar in Dahlonega’ was perfect.”

I look down and my cheeks heat up. “Thanks. Uh...you and Steve are working on Volume Four, right? How’s that comin’?”

“Pretty good. Not bad at all, actually.” There’s a moment of silence and I sneak a look at him. He’s biting his bottom lip. Black hole, black hole, black hole. “Oh, and how’s that Shakespeare thing goin’?”

My eyes light up and I look over at him. “Midsummer! Yes. My pet project! It’s coming. Rich has signed on to direct a few episodes and Matt signed up to be my Puck. I’m really excited to see what we can do with that universe. Fairies are so my jam!”

“Are you just producing and writing it, or are you gonna be acting in it?” he asks, leaning forward, showing interest, active listening.

“I’m Hermia, actually. It’s coming along very well.”

“That’s really good. I’m...happy for you.” He smiles and I bite my tongue. God. This is bad. This is so fucking bad. I look away from him. “So, uh, I heard that you RSVP’d to Padalecki’s July Fourth barbecue, but you never showed up.”

I shake my head and sigh. Of course Jared told him I flaked on Independence Day. “Yeah. I was, uh...I was gonna go but-”

“But then you heard my shoot in Georgia got rescheduled and I wasn’t gonna be in Atlanta like I planned so you decided not to risk runnin’ into me?” he guesses.

“Yeah.” I nod and look over at him. “It was fine. I ended up watching fireworks with Nova over Skype.”

“You know...it’s been years. You don’t have to avoid me. We can be adults. Jared misses you.”

I lick my lips and nod. “It’s just hard for me to be around you. I miss Jared too, but I can’t be around you. It’s too hard.”

“This is hard?” he asks. I open my mouth to respond ‘Unbelievably’, but he keeps talking. “Because it’s not hard for me. It's the most natural thing in the world to me.”

I close my eyes and shake my head, settling back in the chair to lean away from him. “This is why it’s hard.” I open my eyes and pull my phone out to finish that game of Solitaire.

He doesn’t say anything else until Mrs. Smith walks out with Maverick fifteen minutes later. “They had a lot of toys in there!” Maverick shouts.

“Indoor voice, Mav,” I say as I stand up. I focus on Mrs. Smith. “So?”

She smiles brightly. “He’s a brilliant child. We would absolutely love to have him here at King Woods.”

“That’s great news!” Jensen exclaims.

“Indoor voice, Jay,” I joke before it hits me that I just called him ‘Jay’ and teased him. Slippery slope. Don’t get comfortable. “Uh, a-anyway. That is great news.”

“We’ll send you the information for tuition and supplies. It was wonderful to meet you both,” Mrs. Smith says.

I bend down and give Mav a hug as she walks away. “You’re awesome, kiddo. I’ll see you this weekend, okay?”

“Okay, Mommy!”

He runs to his dad and I pick up my purse, stepping toward the door. Jensen puts his hand out as he picks Maverick up to hold him on the other side. He pulls me into a half hug and I go stiff as his hand lands on the small of my back. God, he smells so good...and his hand is so big and…

I pull away and lick my lips. “You and Daddy have fun, Mav!” I almost run out of the lobby and into the parking lot.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The Kitchen Sink - @emoryhemsworth @flamencodiva @wasabiwitteks @rainbowkisses31 @rissbennett @mariekoukie6661 @officiallyunofficialperson @dolphincliffs @mrs-meghan-winchester @gayspacenerd @foxyjwls007 @ilovefanfic86 @marvelfansworld @f-yeahfandoms @wonderlandfandomkingdom @hhiggs @sev3nruby  @hobby27 @paintballkid711 @divadinag @thewhiterabbit42 @fantasymyth-1 @queenoftheunderdark @cosicas-cuquis @superfanficnatural @letsby @supernatural-bellawinchester @onethirstyunicorn @swinchester27 @chalicia @sunnyroadtrips @screechingartisancashbailiff @death-unbecomes-you @dayasvalkyrie Hunter Tags - @atc74 @sandlee44 @spnbaby-67 @kalesrebellion @tumbler-tidbits @hoboal87 @stoneyggirl @kbl1313 @cookiechipdough @mrswhozeewhatsis @winchesterxfamilybusiness @holylulusworld @pretty-fortune @screechingartisancashbailiff @we-are-all-a-bunch-of-idjits @imperiusimpala @supernaturalenchanted Gaga For Green Eyes Tags- @typicalweirdbookworm @deanmonandnegansbitch @jadesupernatural @stoneyggirl @4fareader @squirrelnotsam @lyarr24 @akshi8278 @pretty-fortune @we-are-all-a-bunch-of-idjits Happily Ever Eventually Tags- @deanmonandnegansbitch @jamielea81 @xhannahbananax03 @traceyaudette @fabinaforever11 @pretty-fortune @vicmc624​

[meetthemoosemonster]

*Enderman noises*

Hey yall, I wrote a Ranboo fanfic and thought I’d post the link on here so its with all the other things that I write and show random people on the internet!

*Enderman noises* (1918 words) by nika_write_snow Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF Rating: Not Rated Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Relationships: Ranboo & Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF) Characters: Ranboo (Video Blogging RPF), Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), Clay | Dream (Video Blogging RPF), TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF) Additional Tags: Mentioned Clay | Dream (Video Blogging RPF), Mentioned TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Dadza, Enderman Hybrid Ranboo (Video Blogging RPF), Winged Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), Angst, Fluff and Angst, Fluff, Panic Attacks Summary:

Ranboo finds out he has one of Tommys disks, Philza notices the ruined property value and parents the scared enderboy.

"here is the ao3 link, tell me if it doesnt work or something.

Summary:

Ranboo finds out he has one of Tommys disks, Philza notices the ruined property value and parents the scared enderboy.

Or

What I wished happened after Ranboo found the disk, with Dadza because I have Parent Issues (yup, its not just one of them, hahahahahahahahaha)

Characters:

Ranboo

Philza

Content Warnings:

Panic attacks Mild injury That's all I think, but if I missed one please tell me so I can fix it!

Under the cut is the full work, remember, Reblogs fuel the writing braincell!

Purple particles buzzed around Ranboo, his body also vibrating as his breath sped up and his brain grew foggy. This happens sometimes, when things got really bad, and Ranboos memory really started to slip, or he was just straight up panicking. The half enderman boy was sat shaking in front of an open chest surrounded by dug up dirt and soft looking snowflakes that bit at Ranboos skin. He was staring blankly at the green disk in the chest, making vwoops and crackly noises each time the reality of his situation hit him. The enderman hybrid shook his head, making more aggressive enderman noises for a second, then tried to take a deep breath.

‘You're ok, You're ok. Dream isn't here right now. Dream can’t-’

‘I have cat. I have one of Tommys discs. I have one of THE DISCS. Dream gave ME one of THE DISCS? Why? Why would Dream do that? Why would he trust me with something that gave him so much control over Tommy? What did I do?’

‘You didn't do anything, you would have written it down in your memory book,  you would’ve, wouldn't you?’

‘Would I? I didn't write down that I blew up the community house, but I definitely did that, right? I mean, I had that tnt, it must have been me. I just didn't write it down cause I didn't want to remember. What else am I forgetting? What else did I do that was so bad that I didn't even write it down? What else did I want to forget about? What else-’

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Philza was looking through chests looking for glass. The honey farm had broken again, and he needed bottles to fix it.

“This chest system is still scuffed from Tommy, that gremlin child really doesn't know organization does he.” Phil shook his wings in exasperation. He was still looking for the glass when he heard the sounds of an upset enderman. Confused why Edward was so riled up, Phil looked over at the enderman sat awkwardly in a boat, the mobs limbs too long to fit inside. Phil only got more concerned when he saw that Edward was only making small, concerned vwoops after the more aggressive noises, head was turned to look out the window towards Ranboos shack. 

Phil followed the endermans gaze to look at Ranboos shack through the window and sucked in a breath. What used to be a snowy lawn in front of Ranboos makeshift base was now a big hole of messily dug up dirt. Phil could see Ranboos figure, looking eerily small for his actual towering height, hunched over in front of a small chest, a shovel shimmering on the ground next to him. But what concerned Phil the most were the enderman noises coming from the area. Phil had heard Ranboo make some enderman noises before when he talked to Edward, and a couple in passing to himself, he'd never seen such loud scared crackles and vibrating noises from him before.  Another small worried vwoop from Edward grounded Phil enough to realize that this kid probably needed help. Phil grabbed his coat and wrapped it awkwardly around his wings before he rushed out the door and headed to where Ranboo was. 

As Phil approached, he could clearly see the cloud of purple particles around Ranboo, who appeared to be shaking, no, vibrating. His suit was wet from the melted snow, and plastered to his body, and Phil flinched remembering how much water could hurt enderman. His hair was also soaking, the white and black strands dripping. There was an indent where his crown would usually be, but Phil could see the red and green jewel encrusted golden band a couple blocks away, in one of the deeper areas of the damage. Phils footsteps slowed the closer he got to the dug up lawn, trying not to scare the kid with heavy footsteps on snow. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ranboo was trying to breath. ‘In, out, in, out, in, out, in, out, in- Does it even matter?’ He understood better now why he might have wanted to forget. It would be easier to not remember the chest or its contents, ‘Traitor’, Dreams voice in his head, his panic room. But the thought of forgetting and then finding out what he'd done when his friends, ‘Are they my friends?’, found out what he had done filled his body with terror and caused his eyes to well up with tears. It felt familiar. ‘Why does it feel familiar?’ The air around Ranboo felt like it was vibrating with the enderman hybrid and the particles that circled around him, and the glitchy noises started getting louder.

‘Stop thinking, stop, STOP, STOP THINKING.’ Ranboo let out the enderman equivalent of a scream, and then winced as he felt tears fall down the sides of his face, leaving burning trails of pain.

“Hey, Mate, you okay?” Ranboo jolted at Phils soft voice, a small surprised vwoop coming out. 

“Oh, Oh, um, yeah” Ranboo said quickly, hastily trying to close the chest in front of him, but accidentally slamming the lid on his thumb as his shaky hands fumbled with it. “Im fine, I was just uh…..” He trailed off, not having a good explanation for the mess that he made other than the truth. And he couldn't tell Phil that. ‘But you can! You should, so you stop betraying everyone.’

“Mhm…” Phil hummed skeptically as he looked at the chaos, but decided not to press. He looked back at Ranboo, who was shakily trying to stand up, but then had to sit back down, his body too exhausted and painful. Ranboo looked up for a second, locking eyes with the winged man standing cautiously in front of him. He realized his mistake too late, and was too exhausted to stop the instinctual reaction. He felt his jaw fall and the air begin to buzz intensely all over again. He felt defensive beyond reason, like he always did when he lost control while making eye contact. Luckily, Phil noticed Ranboo tense up and saw his jaw fall, showing off purple glowing teeth like spikes and looked down, breaking eye contact. His gaze found the black and white mask Ranboo usually had covering his mouth was on the ground next to them, soaked and abandoned.

“How about you come into Technos house with me so we can get you dried up, Ok?” Phil was still looking at the ground, and couldn't see if Ranboo was calmer now, but he felt the buzzing particles in the air fade significantly at his quiet words. Phil dared to glance back at the soaking white and black kid, and relaxed when he saw Ranboo was also looking down, more out of exhaustion than anything, but definitely more calm now. His jaw was back where it usually was, and he was no longer vibrating intensely. 

“Ok, here, let me pick up your crown and mask, and then we can head back to the house.” When he had put the 2 items away he held out his hand to Ranboo who took it carefully, almost as if he was afraid it would be snatched back. But it wasn't, and Phil helped Ranboo stand up, and started to lead the boy through the snow, leaving the chest behind them. Ranboo leaned against the significantly shorter man next to him, stumbling through the snow, his brain foggy from the pain and fear. Philza felt him shaking slightly, and nearly pulled away, worried that the enderman hybrid was panicking again. Almost immediately he realized that Ranboo was just shivering from the cold, being in a soaking wet suit surrounded by snow was going to make nearly anyone freezing cold, Enderman hybrids being no exception. Phil freed one of his wings from his coat and wrapped it around the kid to warm him up, not caring that he would have to deal with wet feathers later.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When they reached the house Phil got Ranboo a spare bed, which the boy flopped gratefully down on. Phil chuckled quietly for a second before grabbing a set of antarctic empire style clothes and placing them on the bed.

“Don’t go to sleep yet mate, you need to change out of those wet clothes so you don't hurt yourself anymore.” Ranboo slowly nodded as he sat back up and ran his shivering hands over the soft material of the clothes. Phil started towards the stairs, then looked back for a second.

“I'll be right back with something warm for you to drink so you can warm up quicker, and a health pot or 2 so we can take care of the water damage. Once you're done with that you can sleep, Ok?” Ranboo mumbled something that Phil took as an agreement, and headed the stairs.

Ranboo changed into the fuzzy clothes as quick as his shivering, tired body would let him, too tired to question why the clothes fit him perfectly despite the fact that he towered over Phil, Techno, and Tommy too. He sat back down before his legs could give out again and sighed, feeling himself getting warmer. 

His eyes were beginning to fall closed when he heard Phils foot footsteps and looked over to Philza, who was holding a steaming mug in one hand, and a health potion in the other. He also had a towel draped over his arm. Phil handed the enderman hybrid the health potion first, which he drank quickly, and then the towel. Ranboo just wrapped it around his head, too tired to put anymore effort into drying his hair. The bed shifted slightly as Phil sat down on the bed, maneuvering his wings around so he could give Ranboo space. Ranboo took the mug of what he could now tell was hot chocolate and began to take small, experimental sips. 

After a bit he pulled his knees up to his chest and leaned against Phils body, still taking small sips of his drink. Phil smiled at the boy and slowly wrapped his wings around them both, hoping it would help warm up Ranboo faster. When the enderman hybrid was done with his drink he closed his eyes and let his head rest on Phils shoulder, letting out a small sigh before he fell asleep. Phil didn't move for a bit, only moving his hand to carefully take the mug out of the others hand, and he settled down for a while, just thinking about the day's whole ordeal. Questions filled his brain. ‘Why did Ranboo dig up all that area so messily? What was even in that chest, and why was he so obviously scared of me seeing it? Why was he so scared?’ Phil tried his best to just brush them off, he would ask Ranboo another day, when he was more calm, and feeling better. 

Some time had passed by now, and Philzas wings were beginning to cramp, so he gently laid the boy down on the bed, and carefully threw a thick blanket over him. Ranboo looked very peaceful in this moment, small vwoops coming out occasionally, but he didn't sound distressed. Phil smiled for a second before he grabbed the pile of wet clothes and took them upstairs to get washed and dried with the mask. Ranboo felt safe and warm for the first time in a long time, and he was content, dreaming about defeating a dragon with a steak or something, snuggled under the warm blanket. Who knows, dreams are weird.

Thank you for reading! If you got to this point I wish you the most amazing day, thank you!

[levyfiles]

I want to start a shyan blog but I’m so scared because I don’t know how Shane and Ryan actually feel about it which makes me nervoussssssss help

Ohhh boy, brace yourself, nonnyhunny. I’ve got some word vomit for ya

To start off with, I just want anyone and everyone who is currently new to navigating this terrain we call the internet to know one thing and that is this one very important concept. Embrace your own insignificance! The internet is a big place. I once read a post on here that encouraged new users to think of Tumblr itself like you’re walking into a Walmart. You’re not here to make friends and you’re not here to shop for everyone else; you’re filling your own cart with the things you need and like and if someone comes along and takes a long good look at the things in your cart and says, “WOAH there, eating trans fats is unhealthy for you! I never eat trans fats because of a big list of reasons! Stop buying trans fats!!” you’re gonna be both puzzled and annoyed because it’s your cart, your Walmart experience; why the hell do they care what you’re gonna get?

However! I get it, the internet is now comprised of six different websites/apps and if you’re on there, there is no way to avoid or curate a completely ideal sense that you’ve made a space that’s all your own. There are going to be people who disagree with you, people who decide they don’t like what you do, but ultimately, in the midst of all that, you’re going to find people who feel the same in whatever regard you express yourself and that’s why it’s important to just express yourself because otherwise you’re going to develop a lot of disingenuous connections with people who would likely try to ruin your life if you disagree with them on some subject or other.

Now with that whole disclaimer in mind, I also understand where you’re coming from. Putting myself in the shoes of someone just trying to participate in a new fandom where there is a lot of contention among the masses about the rights and wrongs of RPF and whether the concept fits in with a philosophical debate about human nature and the way we interact with each other, witness each other’s journeys. That’s simply it, however; it’s an ongoing debate and where philosophy and debate are concerned, I always hold the belief that an individual’s right to ground themselves and say “These are the principles I wish to abide by” is sacred and ultimately, no amount of anonymous hatred or shrieking messages of outrage is gonna change that until you yourself decide that the principle isn’t working for you personally. My principle is that it’s fiction; an AU to explore as valid and sweet to me as demon!Shane headcanons are, but moreso because I identify with queer love stories and friendships forged by strangely deep similarities and complementing souls. I also love personalities like theirs, love the idea of said friendship and what it would bring to a story about two human beings who meet by happenstance and end up building something world-changing together. Still, because I am just a writer and a consumer of media, that’s the nicest thing I can give myself, a fictional account of these things while witnessing the real version happen in parallel. I get to celebrate in the overlap of similarities the real world and my fictional account take and watch it inspire my friends and mutuals to build their own universes and it’s beautiful. 

With that point being made, I also understand the reason a lot of people are nervous about being open about shipping. The backlash from a bunch of strangers seems to take on a note that would make even the nicest person sound like a puritan about to hold some extravagant witch trials. Nothing more interesting than a person claiming to do good in the world using words like “exterminate” “cleanse” or my personal favourite “purge”. I’ve read rumours being spread about shippers that take on their own life especially because it’s human nature to let other people handle the research; it’s human nature to just take a believable narrative at face value. One rumour being that shippers of this fandom write stories where we kill off Shane and Ryan’s significant others. Myself and my friends who are avid readers of the ao3 tag know that that hasn’t been the case since 2016/17 and by all accounts, I have yet to find the fic where this happens (barring a tinsworth fic I’ve only heard about). Mind you, not many of us check out Wattpad but even there it’s more self-insert friendly with themes I can’t even stomach. 

Which leads me to the last point and the main reason you sent this ask, I’m assuming. Ryan and Shane’s personal thoughts on the issue. Now, it behooves me to supply screenshots and proof when I make a claim but let’s consider if instead from the perspective of two adult men who have operated online far longer than a lot of their audience. Given that I am the same age as Shane, I know what the internet used to look like and how far it’s come and RPF is not a brand new thing neither did it pop up out of nowhere when One Direction debuted. And just like fanfiction in and of itself had its pushback from media because of its demographic and absolutely because of its queer-leanings, RPF appears to get a lot of that same energy, but it’s not an inherently toxic past time. Much like any fandom activity, it can get bad because fandom is not a monolith; it’s a bunch of individuals enjoying a medium in the ways they have learned to. You’re gonna get some individuals who “do it wrong” and some who do it differently, but ultimately, just like the forums and the reddit threads Shane and Ryan trawl in their past time, there are circles you learn not to veer into and terms you learn to blacklist/block/mute. With that being an indication of where they’re coming from as internet creators, I am confident when I say that, as long as it’s not being mailed to them, linked or quoted at them, they don’t care. They would know something that gets popular on the internet summons a brand of transformative art and fiction but much like they tend to ignore thirst tweets in their mentions or the repetitive requests for the same things over and over. They’d see it and gloss right over it. Shane is the type who writes long essays on reddit addressing the things that bother him, Ryan is weird and vocal and an oversharer sometimes when it comes to things Shaniacs say to him (i.e. that Voice he did for the occasional Shaniac who approaches him). It’s just one of the incarnations of fandom that they choose not to engage with, which, good? Because it’s a fan-specific activity. Once in a while you get a creator who wants to interact with fanfiction and it goes sideways because not all stories are written for them, much like not all fanart is made with the mindset to share with them. 

It’s just a regular old fan interaction and community habit that builds bigger followings. 

All in all, I’m not gonna tell you what to do. Unless you mean to be in their @’s all the time or link them on discord, or put any of your content in their hands, they are not going to see it. They don’t care. What they do care about is that you’re watching, that you support them and send them encouragement because they’re creating their own medium of content and a bigger following means more people get to see it and extract something positive from it.  

[katehuntington]

2020, 1st edition Disclaimer: ‘Kate Huntington’s Author & Fanfiction Recommendations’ is a platform for writers, to show appreciation for their work and expand their audience. I do not claim to be the author of these stories, neither do I own them. Read each writer’s warnings carefully, most of them are rated +18. 

Without further ado, here is my list of recommendations.

One shots 

“While You Sleep” - written by @foreverwayward​ Fluff - Dean Winchester - 617 words       A heartwarming little fic about Dean living the domesticated life we all wish he could have. The writer has a very clever way of storytelling and the end might come as a surprise, only adding to the emotion it already brought along.

“Imagine” - written by @pennydrabbles​ Fluff - Dean x Reader - 800 words      ‘Imagine calling Dean after a bad day and saying you miss him,’ says the header of this marvelous little story. It’s soothing, with strong descriptions, yet never over the top. Simplicity isn’t necessarily a bad word. It takes skill to not overy describe a scene and let the tale be told by the personal emotion of the reader. The author is able to do this with such elegance, that you actually feel Dean’s comfort.

“Heartbeats” - written by @there-must-be-a-lock​ Fluff - Dean x Castiel - 930 words      Castiel is fascinated by the human heart, but doesn’t quite understand it, until he becomes human himself. I’ll start by saying that I don’t ship Dean and Cas together, but I do appreciate the people who do. What this little piece of art does is incredible, however, because while I was reading, I found myself rooting for them. The writer does a great job by using the literal human heart as a backbone of this story. Intriguing and very well executed.

“Everything That’s Yet To Come” - written by @fictionalabyss​ Fluff - Dean x Reader - 812 words      Dean experiences what the future beholds, with the people who he wishes could be there. The author took me by the hand through this moving little one shot, which feels like a collection of greatest hits and wishes come true. It offers peace and closure not only for the older Winchester brother, but for the reader as well. Beautiful piece of writing.

“Take A Drunk Girl Home” - written by @amanda-teaches​ Fluff - Dean x Reader - 1869 words      Dean taking care of others; it’s his nature and shows what a kind soul he truly is. The situation sketched here is no exception, and it’s softer than one can imagine. The pace is steady and the balance between fluff and comedy is just right. A lovely read.

“New Beginnings” - written by @our-jensen-ackles-love​ Fluff - Dean x Reader - 1665 words      New Year’s Eve; a new start, a new life and plenty of reason to celebrate. A lovely ‘feel good’ story that makes us forget about the monsters, pain and loss Supernatural is known for. The level of fluff is equivalent to cuddling with puppies.

“When He Cries” - written by @revengingbarnes​ Angst/fluff - Dean x Reader - 1894 words       When the woman who Dean loves falls victim during a case, the hunter has trouble dealing with the aftermath. And, boy... Does that hurt to witness. This is one of the most breathtaking stories I have stumbled on. The realism that is used to describe the gruesome and horrific angst, the emotion that is laced in every word, had me clutching my chest while reading. It’s is a beautiful piece of art.

“Nobody” - written by @soaringeag1e​ Angst - Dean x Reader - 2561 words      This one shot reminds us why we should never stay angry with a loved one and let a fight unresolved, because what if something bad happens and we won’t have the chance to make it right? The writer gives a great sense to that fear and having to watch Dean go through this nightmare is truly heartbreaking. 

“The Demon Inside You” - written by @foreverwayward​ Smut/angst - Demon!Dean x Reader - 4375 words       Curing Dean from the demon that he has become proves to be difficult when he’s so hard to resist. What else is hard to resist, is this beautiful pitch black one shot. I don’t read Demon!Dean fiction often, because it still feels foreign to see the character who I love so much turn into something evil. This however, is so gripping and well written, that the darkness swallows up the beholder. Rough, hot, sad, narcissistic, all these ingredients packed up in one hell of a story.

“Curves And Edges” - written by @kittenofdoomage​ Smut/fluff/angst - Dean x Reader - 4375 words       This equally sweet, sexy, funny and sad story is a big shout out to all women who think they don’t meet the beauty standards and feel like they will never be good enough to get noticed. It is one thing to replace a name with Y/N and call it a reader’s insert; it’s a gift to make every person reading this feels like they are the character in this story. The author handles every woman’s insecurities with grace, making her words both relatable and soothing. Her spot on version of Dean reminds us that we are all beautiful, desired and unique.

“Hold Her Tight” - written by @waywardbaby​ Fluff/smut - Dean x Reader - 2955 words     ‘A story of a deep need to feel someone close to you’, is how the author describes her work. I couldn’t have said it better, because this one shot isn’t about sex; it’s about love making, and there’s a difference. What I also appreciate, is that Y/N takes the time to pamper herself. We all deserve some self care.

“Watch Your F!cking Mouth!” - written by @impala-dreamer​ Smut/comedy - Dean x Reader - 1984 words       Dean falls under a literal curse, and it’s the most fun I’ve had in a long time. I was wheezing, couldn’t breathe and died laughing. It’s astonishing how the writer can juggle comedy and sex without the two taking each other down. An uplifting read.

“Thank God For Sexual Frustration” - written by @winchester-fantasies​ Smut - Dean x Reader - 4398 words       God had nothing to do with writing this sinful story; we can thank the author for that. When Y/N is on a dry spell that has her frustrated, Dean helps her out in the best way imaginable. Delicious smut served in three courses, because we all know Dean keeps his lady satisfied.

Series:

“Life For Rent” - written by @winchest09​ Smut/angst/fluff - Mobster!Dean x Escort!Reader  - WIP      This amazing series follows an experienced, smart and resilient escort, who is ruled by contracts, money and aliases. When Dean becomes her client, he makes it his mission to understand what this interesting woman is hiding.       Conspiracies, deceat, crime. A strong family bond, blossoming love, oh, not to mention the sex. This series is intriguing beyond imagination and certainly not just another mobster fanfiction. The writing is smart and I could tell from the first paragraph that it’s loaded with hints and foreshadowing, but I couldn’t pick them out. This triggers a curiosity like an itch I can’t quite scratch away until I finish reading this story. And so I wait eagerly and drop everything the second a new chapter comes out.  An absolute must read!

“Findings” - written by @kathaswings​ Angst/smut/fluff - Dean x Reader - finished. Update: Sadly, this series is no longer online      This story starts out with what seems to be a routine demon hunt, until Dean and his brother find a frightened five year old survivor amongst the blood and corpses. Keeping the smart little Mackenzie safe and getting her back to her older sister proves to be difficult, because this case is a whole lot bigger than they anticipated and is likely to change their lives forever.      This is one of my favorite Supernatural series and I revisited it recently. The overall story arc is a mystery I just had to unravel and I couldn’t put it down if I wanted to. The bond between Dean and Mackenzie is so precious. Writing a child isn’t easy. I’ve read plenty of books and seen plenty of films in which the maturity the creators added wasn’t natural, but this author handles Mac’s dialogue amazingly well. What’s also interesting is the jumps from point of view between Dean and Y/N, giving very personal perspectives on the gripping story.

“When You Least Expect It” - written by @coffee-obsessed-writer​ Fluff/angst/smut - Jensen Ackles x Musician!Reader - WIP      This gorgeously written slow burn series kicks off when Jensen visits the idyllic town of Seaside. After a bad breakup he keeps his mind occupied with the organisation of a music festival, hoping to find a musician that fits the vibe he has in mind. He meets a spirited, undiscovered performer, not only her voice catching him by surprise. A friendship blossoms, with potential to grow into something more, but will their past allow the love they feel for each other?      Talking about an epic love story, but it’s so much more than that. The music that plays such an important factor, the setting that is Seaside. The fabulous supporting characters Bri, Rob, Jason and Jared, the wardrobe, not to mention the wonderful little gems and details that this author weaved into the story, showing how much love she has put into it. This is without a shadow of a doubt my favorite RPF I’ve come across.

Thank you for reading! If you enjoyed the work of the authors above, don’t be afraid to let them know. I’m sure they will appreciate it. Feel free to share!

If you have any suggestions or would like a tag in the future, drop a request in my inbox or send me a message.

Love, Kate

‘Kate Huntington’s Author & Fanfiction Recommendations’ taglist: @adoptdontshoppets​ @fangirlxwritesx67​ @idksupernatural​ @indecisive20something​ @tranquility-or-chaos​ @winchest09​ @wingedcatninja​

[this-is-lightning]

Supercorp FicRec P.13

The next part in my ongoing ficrec series. I go through my bookmarks on AO3 and select the ones I like the best and add a little commentary on why. 5 fics per part. 

Masterpost

Avenues of Escape by IcarusAndHerSun

Agent Kara Danvers keeps to herself. She's gruff and arrogant, preferring work over friends. Together with her sister Alex, she owns half of Fortress Intelligence Agency - a private firm that handles clandestine contracts for the government. With a dark past, a chip on her shoulder, and a much bigger heart than she'd ever admit, she's an enigma to everyone she meets.

To spite her rich parents, Lena Luthor chooses to work for the government for a number of years before applying for a position at FIA. Now, she's the foremost analyst on emerging cartels in the Caribbean - and the perfect partner for Kara on her next mission to the tropical south.

The problem is that Kara doesn't want a partner - and Lena isn't exactly her biggest fan either.

With lives on the line and a web of crime that grows more and more complex every day, they need to learn how to work together - before time runs out.

w: 51,843

r: explicit

Not finished yet. Really liked it. Very sweet enemies to lovers. They both protective af. Great plot. Good smut and lots of it cause they horny for each other. Kara is a bad-boy type character here, sort of: All repressed emotions, a bit rude, protective and just so smitten, lay her life down. Lena does not put up with her bs. 

Out Of Your System by BigMammaLlama5

Sometimes adding an extra layer to your friendship... isn't so bad.

w: 62,682

r: very explicit

Fwb AU. They both horny. Lena has experience and Kara is down for whatever. Very soft (outside negotiated scenes in the bedroom lol). Good communication, at first: Feelings are realized, they get angsty about them. So, pining. Happy ending. Check the kink tags before reading.

kiss me, hardy! by Stalemate

A British spy plane crashes in Nazi-occupied France. It's pilot and passenger are best friends, but just one of the girls has a chance at survival. After landing from a parachute jump, Verity is forced to write everything she knows or be executed. She chooses to confess, only it won't be what anyone expected.

OR

It's the Code Name Verity AU no one asked for, but everyone needs. (You don't need to have read the book to understand the story.)

w: 11,164

r: general audiences

Very interesting. I liked the setting. Not actually that much with them together. Action, torture (minor). Happy ending.

Only a Matter of Mime by karalovesallthegirls

Kara's a mime. Lena learns to deal with that.

w: 13,390

r: mature

A fandom classic. Its silly and sweet and fluffy. Minimal angst, you wont even notice. Lena is very kind and lonely, Kara charms her with her mime shenanigans. 

blockbuster (it's the movie au ok) by unnecessary_databass

Kara Danvers and Lena Luthor are the stars of a groundbreaking new lesbian blockbuster. It's the film that makes you cry, wins all the awards, and defeats all the stereotypes. And the chemistry between the stars in real life is insane. Everyone says so. Except for them. Mhm.

it's the freaking movie au all in one place wouldya look at that chapter breaks and everything! hopefully, a lack of typos, but a horrible job formatting, sorry. so if you feel like something is missing from the formatting, read it on tumblr! I can work italics and spacing there.

w: 105,092

r: not rated (mature fits best i think)

One of my all time favorites. Loved every sentence of it. They are both actors but this is no RPF (like at all). Aaaall the pining, especially Kara. But it doesn’t get overwhelming. There are many time jumps, but it works really well, little bits of their life over the years. Very sweet, fluff, hurt comfort, fake dating elements (sort of). Friends to lovers. Everyone is rooting for them. Fandom classic. Must read!

[lovelyrocker]

Love Is Blind Ch.53

~ RPF

~ Characters: Jensen Ackles, Lexi Ackles(OFC), Jared Padalecki, Chris Jefferson, Danneel Ackles, Genevieve Padalecki, 

~ Pairing: Jared x Lexi(OFC)

~ Warning: Talk of Abuse, Talk of Sexual Assault, Language, Violence, Age Gap, Angst, Talk of Miscarriage, Angst, Drinking

~ Word Count: 3173

~ Un Beta’d - All Mistakes Are My Own

~ *FEEDBACK IS GOLD*

Jared turned over in the huge bed he shared with Lexi. The room was still dark and the sun had not yet risen. He saw the faint outline of Lexi’s body on the opposite side of the bed, the bathroom light beaming through the crack in the door showing her back rising and falling as she breathed.

He wanted to move closer, to wrap his arms around her and hold her. Instead he just slipped out of bed and headed to the bathroom. He splashed cold water in his face, not bothering to look at his own reflection in the mirror. Pulling on some sweats he quietly left the house and began running up the familiar path behind their home.

He didn’t even time his run or pace himself really. He just ran. The sun was fully risen by the time he got back. He showered downstairs so he wouldn’t wake Lexi. 

Pouring a cup of the freshly brewed coffee Jared walked to the back sliding door letting Jensen in. 

“Coffee’s fresh.” Jared told him.

“Thanks.” Jensen grabbed his own cup. “How is she this morning?”

“Sleeping still. The meds the doctor gave her keeps her in a fog.” Jared explained, sitting at the breakfast nook.

“Not such a bad thing right now.” Jensen commented following him. “Going to court today?”

“I am. After a week of just Cooper filling me in, it’s time to go back. I doubt Lexi will, though.”

“She’ll be okay.” Jensen watched Jared as he sipped his coffee. “How about you?”

“What about me?”

“How are you dealing with everything?” Jensen watched as Jared simply shrugged. “I know you feel you have to be strong for Lex. But this is just you and me right now. No bullshit.”

Jared met Jensen’s eyes and Jensen saw the tears he was trying to prevent from falling. “It- uh...it hurts man.” A few drops managed to escape his demand. “I know the baby was unplanned and crap but still. We wanted it.” Jared sniffles. “You know we got a letter in the mail yesterday,” Jared placed his cup down, his voice starting to show his emotion. “We’d done a blood test to see what we were having.” His jaw tensed before speaking again. ”It- it, uh, it was gonna be a little boy.” The tears just started pouring from his eyes. “We lost our little boy.” Jared sobbed.

Jensen pulled Jared into a hug and just held him. It was the first time in the weeks since they’d lost the baby that Jared let his emotions out. “It’s alright man, I got ya.” Jensen told him as tears fell from his own eyes.

After Jared had finally let himself break he began to calm himself and sat back up. He ran two hands over his face, taking a deep breath.

“Jared?” Lexi’s concerned voice came from across the room.

“Hey, baby.” Jared sat up straighter.

“Are you okay?” She asked, walking to him, gently carding her fingers through his hair stopping to let her hand rest on his cheek.

“Yeah, I just-” He cleared his throat as if nothing was wrong.

“Jared stop.” She exhaled. “You can be sad too, you know?” She ran a hand through his hair again. “If you need to go to Jensen to be able to do that, then that's fine.” Jared put an arm around her waist and she sat on his lap. “As long as you get it out.”

“How are you feeling, Punk?” Jensen placed a hand on Lexi’s leg. 

“Better. I think last night was the last time I’m gonna take the meds from the doctor. Makes me sleep too much.” She leaned her head on Jared’s. “I feel like its clouding my thoughts and I need to be able to feel my emotions.”

“Just don’t push yourself too much.” Jensen told her. “It’s only been a little over a week.”

“I know. But if I stay going like this, I'll just put myself into a depression.” She lifted her head from Jared’s shoulder to look at her brother,

“I’m gonna go to the trial today, did you wanna come?” Jared asked.

“Not today. Maybe tomorrow.” She pressed a kiss to his head. “I’m gonna shower.” She stood from his lap and walked away.

“She seems okay.” Jensen looked at Jared. 

“She is for the most part.” Jared looked at where she walked out. “She has her moments but she is dealing with it.”

“You know what?” Lexi walked into the kitchen making both men jump. “I think I will go today.” She poured a cup of coffee. “If I don’t I’ll just sit here and cry all day. At least this way I can not focus on it.” She sipped looking at Jared. “Because if I do, I’ll get down and I don’t want to get like that again.”

“It’s okay to take that time if you need it.” Jensen told her.

“I know. And I do. But, I need to get back to normal. It’s been almost weeks. I can’t stay in my bedroom anymore.”

~

Meanwhile downtown Cooper sat across from Chris and Durning with papers scattered in front of them. They’d been in a small room for four hours going over details of who leaked the information to the press. Court was postponed so all details could be reviewed and an end could be put to the constant information going to the media.

“Anything else?” Cooper asked, rubbing his head. “You know for a person always pointing fingers, your partner was quick to run his mouth.“ Cooper eyed Durning.

“We can not apologize to you or Miss. Ackles and Mr. Padalecki enough. Know that my partner was fired and legal actions are being pursued against him.” Durning explained gathering papers.

“Good it will save us from having to do it.” Cooper said, gathering his own papers.

“It was not my intention to have any of this in the media.” Chris told Cooper. “If I would have know he would do this-”

“I believe you.” Cooper held up a hand. “It’s your ass getting torn apart in this. I’m sure you wouldn’t want the world knowing your dirty little secrets.”

Chris nodded, watching Cooper finishing up. “Um- Can I ask you something?” Cooper looked at him. “O-Off the record or whatever.” Chris gained a curious look from both Durning and Cooper.

“What do you want?”  Cooper asked leaning back in his chair.

“Is Lexi okay?”

“That’s none of your business.” Cooper sat back up, continuing to collect his papers.

“I know but, I heard she was sick and in the hospital and-”

“You know you have got a lot of nerve, kid.” Cooper pointed to Chris. “How did you even find that out?” Chris looked down. “Are you in cahoots with your now ex attorney?”

“No!” Chris said quickly. “I- I- at court I overheard my brother and some chick talking about it. I stole his phone and I read she was in the ER.”

“You’re a thief too. That’s good to know.” Cooper stood, grading to the door. 

“Did she really have another miscarriage?” Chris blurted out.

Cooper stopped and looked at Chris. “Your actions have consequences Mr. Jefferson.” Cooper took a breath. “You don’t get to ask about or act concerned about the woman you raped and sexually abuse.” He turned and walked out the room leaving Chris there with his thoughts.

Cooper walked to his car pulling his phone from his pocket. Holding it to his ear he unlocked his car and got in. “Hello?”

“Hey, Jared. Listen buddy, are you home right now?”

“Yeah, Why was court cancelled?”

“I’ll explain all of that when I get there.” It was only twenty minutes later when Cooper pulle up into Jared and Lexi’s driveway. “Jared, hey, is Lexi here?” Cooper greeted Jared with a hug as they walked into the house.

“Yeah, she is in the living room.”

“How is she?”

“Better.” Jared told him as they entered the room.

“Hey Cooper.” Lexi greeted as Cooper leaned down, giving her a hug.

“Hey sweetie. How are you feeling?” Cooper asked sitting next to Lexi, Jared sitting on the opposite side.

“I’m okay.”

“I know it’s been a rough few weeks.” He placed his hand on Lexi’s and looked to Jared as well. “I can’t tell you two how sorry I am that this happened.”

“Thanks.” Lexi said. “Things happened.” She gave Cooper’s hand a squeeze. “So what’s going on?”

“Court was cancelled this morning because before I could even fully wake up I was called into the judges chambers. We found out who leaked all the information to the media.”

“Who?” Lexi and Jared asked in unison.

“It was Durning’s partner.”

“What?!” Jared looked between Cooper and Lexi.

“He was busted by Durning and he actually had the good sense to report it to Judge Browning.” Cooper pulled out a few papers. “This is stating that he was let go from the firm, and action from the court will be taken to see fit the punishment for his crimes against the court.” Lexi and Jared looked over the papers. “There is something else.” The two looked at Cooper. “Before Chris joined our meeting this morning, Durning mentioned a few things.”

“Like?” Jared asked.

“Like, there were several times during the trial so far when Chris told him not to cross examine the witness. Mostly when Lexi was on the stand.”

“Why would he do that?” Lexi looked at Cooper expecting an answer.

“I have no idea. Especially considering Durning was gonna attack you and make you look like a gold digger.” Cooper explained. “He had a plan to turn the tables and make you look like you went for older guys who were “of power” and well off financially. It was pretty convincing to be honest. But Chris wouldn’t let him.”

“That makes no sense.” Jared added with confusion.

“I know. And Chris also asked about you today.” Cooper looked at Lexi. “He found out about what happened.” Lexi looked down at her hand in Jared’s. “Lex,” Cooper grabbed her attention. “He asked to see you.”

“No.” Jared said as soon as the words left Coopers mouth. “Tell him no, she isn’t going anywhere near him.” Jared stood in agitation.

“I’ll go.” Lexi said looking up at Jared.

“I’m gonna let you two talk.” Cooper rose to his feet.

“No need. You aren’t going.” Jared looked back at Lexi. “Come on, Coop. I’ll walk you out.”

When Jared returned he didn’t see Lexi in the living room or kitchen. He heard a sound of pillows rustling in the bedroom as he walked down the hallway upstairs. Lexi was making the bed, tossing the pillows and pulling the blankets all with a little more force than needed. It was obvious she was agitated. 

“Babe-”

“Don’t.” She snapped not looking up from the bed, throwing one of the king pillows back onto the bed. 

“Lexi, I know you’re mad-”

“No. Not mad. I’m pissed off!” She placed the second pillow in its spot. “”Where the hell do you get off making decisions for me like that?”

“Well, considering the situation I think I have the right to.”

“How? How do you get the right to tell me what I can and can’t do?”

“I don’t, I just mean-”

“Exactly!” Lexi snapped walking around the bed to stand in front of Jared. “You don’t! So what makes you think you can say if I go talk to him or not?”

“Because right now you are in any state to deal with this kind of crap!” Jared snapped back. 

“I can handle seeing that asshat! You just don’t want me to!”

“You’re right, I don’t! You have no reason to! And mentally you’re still fragile right now! You’re still hurting!”

“No, I’m not! The problem is you want me to be!” She shoved her index finger into his chest. “You want me to still be a crying mess curled up in a ball in bed!”

“No, I don’t!”

“Bullshit! You want me to be a poor defenseless little thing so you can swoop in and make the decisions because as always, you think you know better! I may not be able to do a damn thing right but I can still make my own decisions!” She shoved passed him.

Jared followed her into the hall. “ That’s not true. What makes you think you can’t do anything right?! Why would you say that?!”

Lexi let out an unhumorous laugh. “Like you haven’t thought about it!” She kept going till she reached down the hall, down the stairs till she was halfway through the house. “I’ve messed up most of my life doing dumb thing after dumb thing and now its just coming to ahead! I mean, I can’t even have a baby right! I can’t even have a baby at all!”

“Lexi, stop!” Jared kept following her till she was in the kitchen. She grabbed a wine glass and a bottle of wine. “Lex, what are you doing?” His voice calmer.

“You’re right.” She put the wine glass back and grabbed a glass whiskey tumbler then walked out of the kitchen and into Jared’s office. “This seems like a situation for something harder.” Lexi grabbed his bottle of Scotch from the liquor table in his office.

She took the bottle out to the back sunroom and poured herself a glass. The sky was a dark gray color despite it being only mid afternoon, as a storm inched its way closer. The sky would light up when the lighting from the approaching storm would strike through the sky. Jared watched her from behind the glass of the door as she sipped her drink. 

Jared walked back to the kitchen grabbing himself a whiskey tumbler and walked out to the sun room. He sat in the chair next to Lexi and poured himself a glass. 

They sat in silence for a long while just looking out at the yard. When the rain finally started to pour from the sky Jared spoke. “Rainstorms were always calming to me. Chaotic and pure at the same time.” Lexi didn’t say anything, she simply looked out at the rainfall bringing her glass to her lips for a small sip of whiskey. “Kinda like you.” Jared told her, his eyes fixated on her. Lexi didn’t say anything still, she just stared at the amber liquid in her glass. Jared took another sip of his drink and leaned forward, placing his elbow on his knees. “Baby, why did you say you couldn’t even have a baby right? You know this wasn’t anything you did, right?”

Lexi had her legs pulled up on the chair, curling the rim of the glass with a finger. “Jared, I’ve had two miscarriages-”

“And neither was your fault.” Jared told her, interrupting. “The first was Chris and this time the doctor said it could have been stress or something was wrong with the baby.”

“Ever think maybe i’m just not meant to have a baby?” Lexi’s voice was sullen as she kept her eyes on her drink.

“Do you really think that?” Lexi shrugged, still not moving her eyes from her glass. “Lex,”

“Jared,” She finally looked up at him, her eyes filled with tears. “Can we not do this right now?” Jared saw her chin quiver, her emotions getting the better of her. “If you don’t want me to go, fine, I won’t go. Just leave me alone right now.” Silently her tears began to trace down her cheeks.

“If you don’t want to talk, that’s fine.” Jared leaned back in his chair. ‘But you’re not gonna be alone.” He grabbed his glass and took a sip of his whiskey.

He poured himself a little more and reached over pouring another glass for Lexi. They sat in silence for a long time. Long enough for them to sip through three glasses of Scotch. The weather was still dark, the rain still pouring like a waterfall. She didn’t move much or really look at Jared. Jared stayed quiet, observing the sky as the dark clouds rolled over even darker skies.

Keeping her eyes casted down Lexi took a small breath. “What if I can’t have kids?” Her voice was defeated. “What if I have something wrong with me and I can’t stay pregnant?”

“What makes you say that?” 

Lexi shrugged. “I don’t know, the fact I lost two babies.”

Jared sat up a little in his seat. “We can see a specialist and have them see if anything is wrong. If you want to.”

“And if there is?” Her eyes flickered to his.

“Then, If it’s what you want we can explore options of fertility and IVF, if that’s the road you want to take.” She looked back at her glass then took another long sip. 

“And if I don’t want to go that road?” She still kept her eyes on her drink like she would find something special in it. 

“You mean if you don’t want to have a baby at all or if you don’t want to carry a baby?” Jared gave a curious head tilt. “Like if you’d rather adopt?”

“What if I don’t want a baby at all?” Her voice held almost a bitter sting to it.

“But, you-”

“I know what I said, Jared.” Lexi exhaled in frustration gulping the rest of her fourth glass of Scotch.  She reached for the bottle but Jared grabbed it first and moved it away. “Jared, stop. I’m done talking about this.”

“Well, i’m not.” He set his glass down. “What are you saying right now, Lexi?”

“I’m saying I don’t want to have kids, okay?!” She all but snapped at Jared. “I love your kids like my own and that’s just gonna have to be enough for you!”

“Don’t you even want to try or- or at least talk about it?” Jared protested with a mix of annoyance and dejection. 

“No, I don’t! I’m tired of talking about it!” She sat up planting her feet on the ground. “Everyone wants to talk about it! My therapist, you, Jensen! I can’t talk about it any more! I can’t-” Her voice wavered. Jared saw the anger in her face meltaway to desperation and fear. “I can’t go through losing another child, Jared! I just can’t!” She yelled out at him.

Jared’s heart shattered into a million pieces when he saw Lexi break. He got out of his chair and onto his knees in front of her, pulling her into his arms. “Okay, okay.” He soothed and she wrapped her arms around him, her face buried in his chest. “We don’t have to. It’s okay.”

Next Chapter>

TAGS: @onethirstyunicorn​ @dreaminemz​ @xostephanie​ @thevelvetseries​ @squirrelnotsam​ @saxxxyjared​ @marvelouslysherlockedhunter​ @vicmc624​

[flannelplanet]

written by @pinklythewitch

Pairing: evanstan (chris evans x sebastian stan)

Rating: explicit

Word Count: a little less than 2300

Warnings: rpf, this is super fucking filthy for one, lots of degrading as a kink, rimming, butt plugs, exhibitionism, dom!Chris, spanking, language... sebastian gets called Baz a lot in this fic and I feel like we’re lacking that honestly. let me know if we missed anything else

Summary: Sebastian loses a bet, and Chris makes him pay up in the most agonizingly amazing way ever. 

a/n: this is NOT my fic. my darling dear friend @pinklythewitch asked me to post it for her, so here you have it. i personally loved it, and i think you will too... just heed the warnings and if degrading isn’t your thing then don’t read it ;) nsfw under the cut 

“You lost the bet, sweetheart. You have to pay up.”

“But tonight? I have that premier and the dinner with the big dinner after and my mom is wanting me to come over and assemble this damn thing from IKEA she bought and--“

Chris smiled too sweetly as Sebastian went over all his excuses. His hand raised and Sebastian instantly fell silent, resigned.

“The only opening I’m concerned about is your tight little ass, Baz. And the only dinner I care about is my cock going down your throat. As for the furniture… I’m not too sure you could assemble it with your bare ass in the air, moaning like my little slut.” Chris said confidently.  Sebastian became increasingly fidgety the more Chris spoke. The blush rising on his cheeks was also another blatant giveaway that his words were already winding Sebastian up. “You getting hard already, sweetheart? Thinkin’ about my cock down your throat? Or so deep in your ass I’m bumping your lungs?” Chris asked, letting his voice drop deeper and deeper until he was nearly growling.

Sebastian could only nod. He reached a hand towards his crotch to try and alleviate the pressure but his hand was knocked away. Chris moved until he was leaning over him. Chris gently rubbed his nose against his neck as he spoke. “You don’t touch what belongs to me without my express permission, sweetheart. Who’s cock is that?”

Sebastian swallowed thickly. “Yours, sir.”

“And who does that tight little hole belong to?” Chris asked.

“You, sir. My body, my mind, my heart, my soul...all yours,” he answered truthfully.

“Good boy. You can go to your functions and duties tonight,” Chris said as he pulled away and Sebastian sighed softly in relief. “In fact, I’ll come with you. Because I got you a present and I want to see you wear it all night tonight.” Chris added.

“All night?” he whispered.

“Until I decide to take it out.” Chris confirmed.

“Take it out? Take what out?”

Standing, Chris strode over to the small hall closet and pulled a black bag that was hanging just inside the door. “Come into the bedroom, sweetheart, and no clothes for you beyond the door.”

Sebastian stood and pulled at his shirt and pants, kicking them to the side as he followed Chris to their bedroom. Stopping at the doorway and pulled his black briefs down, tossing them behind him down the hallway.

“Good boy. Are you gonna give me whatever I want?” Chris asked, going over to the bed and laying down. Sebastian nodded excitedly, ready for anything that his Chris wanted to give him.

“Then come here and give me that pretty little ass. I want to devour you before we go.”

He all but ran to the bed, climbing carefully overtop. Chris grabbed his hips, positioning him until he was braced on his hands and feet, in much like a bridge position. His chest faced the ceiling and his back arched over Chris’ body, ass positioned perfectly for Chris’ mouth.

“You’re going to hold that position, Baz. You’re not allowed to drop or move away from me. God, look at you. So hard and dripping for my mouth already. I see how full you are. You’re not allowed to cum until I tell you.” Chris ordered.

Sebastian whimpered softly. “Yes, sir.”

With a wicked smile, Chris pulled him back against his face, licking a gentle stripe from his (deliciously, if you ask Chris) full, heavy balls down to his eagerly awaiting hole. He wanted to chuckle when he heard Baz’s breath leave his lungs in a rush. He could feel the other man’s thighs shake already.

“Such an excited little slut for my tongue. Can’t wait to feel me taste you from the inside, can you?” Chris ground out between kitten licks.

“Yes, please, yes!” he hissed, trying to keep hold of his control.

Sebastian nearly cried in joy when he felt Chris’ tongue skillfully work its way past the tight ring of muscle. His hips bucked outside of his control for a moment and he tensed up, making Chris groan softly. He pulled back slowly, making Sebastian cherish the movement inside him.

“I don’t think I’ll ever tire of how you taste, sweetheart. And I can feel you clenching on my tongue. I can’t wait until I can be buried so deep in that sweet little ass that you feel me for fuckin’ days.” Chris said, smiling to himself as Sebastian groaned. “Or maybe you’d just ride my face like a whore begging for release…?” Chris asked just before eagerly diving back in.

Sebastian whined deep in his chest, his shoulders and thighs shaking when he felt Chris lick back to his balls, swirling his tongue around the tender skin. Sebastian was just about to beg for any kind of relief when he felt something cool and slippery push against his hole and slide in. “Don’t tense up, sweetheart. This is your payment for the bet you lost.” Chris growled.

Sebastian relaxed his body, trusting Chris implicitly. He wriggled around gently, feeling the plug seat perfectly in his ass. “Greedy little hole.” Chris whispered to himself, delivering a sharp smack to Sebastian’s ass cheek. “Just making sure you’re still with me.”

Sebastian glanced up to find Chris smiling wickedly. He wanted to scream when he felt Chris lick around the plug, the warmth of his tongue contrasting perfectly with the cool metal of the plug. Chris moved suddenly, pressing Sebastian down to the bed while his strong body pinned him down. Bracing himself on his elbows above Sebastian, he ground his hips (and incredibly obvious erection) against the other man’s ass and subsequent plug.

“Half of me and want to see if I can fit my cock in with the plug while the other half wants to keep you so tight you could cut off circulation,” Chris taunted. “Or I could fuck you mercilessly with the plug while you suck my cock down that pretty little throat. So many options, so little time.”

Cutting off any response Sebastian would have made, Chris presses a searing kiss that Sebastian felt to the very core of his being. He could feel exactly how much Chris loved and wanted him in kisses like these. It branded him and he treasured it.

“Go get ready before I lose my control and fuck you raw all night long.” Chris said as he pulled away.

“I don’t think that would really be a bad thing.” Sebastian replied, a gorgeous glow blossoming on his skin while a smirk played on his lips.

…

Somehow, Chris and Sebastian made it on time to the opening of Sebastian’s latest film. Chris noticed he was walking carefully, knowing the plug was casually, gently brushing against his prostate and he had to suppress a laugh when he thought about all the delightful functions of the plug that Sebastian had yet to discover. Chris had purposely bumped against Sebastian’s ass the entire time, loving the tiny beads of sweat that graced his boyfriend’s temple.

The couple was directed to a hallway to wait to be seated in the theater when Chris pulled out his phone, feigning an important text message. He opened the app that was associated with the plug currently deep in his lover’s ass and flipped the little bar to the ‘on’ position. He moved the intensity toggle up to slow, making Sebastian’s head whip to the side to fix Chris with a look.

“Really?” he whispered, eyes widening.

Chris slid the intensity toggle up even higher for a few seconds before sliding it to the ‘off’ position. “Wow, cool. I didn’t know it did that. That’s fun, isn’t it?” Chris asked, sounding innocent.

“Baby…”

“You have to pay up, sweetheart. What better way than to see how much I can torture your prostate in public before you cum in your $900 pants?” Chris smirked at his own joke. Sebastian and his ridiculously expensive clothes were always fun to tease.

Sebastian was, all at once, incredibly turned on and incredibly horrified. Chris could (and would) turn it on at the most inopportune time, wanting to test his limits and control. Chris smiled and escorted his lover to their seats, his hand in his pocket casually. Just as Sebastian began to sit down in his theater seat, Chris flipped the intensity toggle to medium high for a few seconds.

“Goddammit!” He stood back up quickly, glaring at Chris.

Chris knew that Sebastian sitting down would make the plug press against his prostate perfectly (which, of course, is why he flipped the intensity up). Chris turned it off again, smiling. “Sweetheart? Are you okay? Did you stub your toe?”

What Sebastian wanted was to wipe that smile off his boyfriend’s face. With his ass. “Oh, you know how clumsy I am,” he said before sitting down quickly again.

“Must have slipped. My bad.” Chris whispered, though both of them knew it was a lie.

The two of them watched the movie in relative peace, until Chris’ hand wandered to his boyfriend’s lap. He could feel how hot and heavy the erection Sebastian had was, and how tightly it was straining against the fabric of his suit pants. Chris casually rubbed his hand against Sebastian’s balls, cupping them teasingly through the constricted fabric. Face burning pink, Sebastian still made no move to stop him.

Chris smiled, keeping his eyes on the movie screen. Sebastian gently tugged his hand up to his mouth, sucking a finger in, rubbing his tongue along his fingertip. Chris wanted to hiss and the action sent sparks directly to his cock. He wondered briefly if he could get away with moving Baz to his lap and sliding his cock in balls deep. Chris would bet anything he could make Sebastian cum so hard that it would land several rows in front of them.

When the movie finally ended, the couple made their way to the restaurant for dinner with the producers and directors. Chris turned the vibrating plug up when it came Sebastian’s turn to order, making him blush and stutter over his words. Several times during the dinner, Chris would flip the intensity toggle, primarily while he was trying to explain something or answer a question.

“Seb, man, you okay? You’re shaking and sweating bullets. Maybe you ought to call it a night.” The director suggested.

“I think you’re right,” Chris butt in, answering for Sebastian. “I hope he’s not coming down with something. I’ll have him call you when he’s feeling more like himself. Ready to go, sweetheart?”

Sebastian all but dragged Chris out of the restaurant. During the limo ride back to their condo, Chris repeatedly flipped the switch from high to low, making him moan and writhe against the expensive leather seat, begging for relief. “You’ve been such a good little slut for me. When we get home, you’re to strip and present your pretty little ass for me on the bed. I’ll remove the plug when I’m good and ready.”

Sebastian tried his best to run up to the elevator and down the hallway to their condo, but Chris smirked and turned the vibrating plug to high, watching Baz stumble and trying to cross his legs to stave off the orgasm. He was nearly crying when he opened the door, stripping frantically as he made for their bed. Chris pulled his own clothes off and ran his hand gently over the curve of Sebastian’s ass before smacking a pink handprint against the pale skin causing him to cry out. “Please, Sir. I can’t handle anymore. I feel like I’m losing my mind. I need you, please? Please?”

Chris saw the tears gathering in his eyes and knew he’d hit the limit. Chris gently eased the plug from his boyfriend’s hole, soothing it with licks and kisses. He snatched the lube and applied enough before tossing it to the side and pressing in. “I want you to cum for me, sweetheart. I want you to lose control and cover our sheets with your cum.” Chris growled.

Sebastian repeated his praise and gratitude over and over as Chris set up a punishing pace. His filthy mouth was running as he fucked into his boyfriend, saying things like “You gonna drain me dry? It’s like your ass is sucking my cock itself. That’s it, sugar. Take all your fucking pleasure from me. Use my cock. Take it.”

Sebastian cried out as an orgasm slammed into him. Chris moved one hand to jerk him off and used the other to hold him up and ride him through his orgasm. “You’re soaking my hand, sweetheart. Absolutely drenching it. You’re so tight around my cock it’s taking all my strength to pull out and thrust back in.”

Sebastian moaned loudly, not caring who heard him.

“Cum in me. Fill me up so I leak you for days. Plug me back up, baby… Keep your cum inside me until you’re ready to fuck me again. Keep me used and open just for you.” Sebastian begged, the words tumbling out in a well-fucked blur.

Chris let himself lose control as he let his pleasure overtake him while Sebastian whispered soft words of encouragement to him, letting him know just exactly how good his cock felt jerking and spilling inside of him.

After they came down from their post-orgasmic highs, Sebastian sighed. “ Looks like I’m going to have to lose bets more often.”

[thefanficmonster]

Time And Time Again

Dream x Reader (Female)

Warnings: Swearing

Genre: FLUFF, Romance, Humor, RPF (Real Person Fic)

Summary: Basically a rundown of some of the most recent cute moments brought to you by the most adorable will-they-won’t-they couple: Y/N and Dream.

Requested by Anon. Hi dear! Thank you so much for your wonderful request, it really made my day when I received it! I hope I captured what you wanted and what you had in mind in the fic and I hope you enjoy the read! This is my first time writing for Dream so I hope I don’t mess it up hehe. Love, Vy ❤

“I don’t wanna go in the cave!“ Y/N squeals in terror when she realizes that in order to make progress in the game and continue moving onward with the story, she has to walk Blake through the dark, dingy and danger-ridden cave in Outlast 2. The gang’s all there with her on a Discord call to keep her company, knowing she’s a scaredy cat underneath that tough girl exterior. And being the scaredy cat she is while also having a preference for horror games has made Friday nights very interesting for her and her friends: her, Clay, George and Sapnap sit on a Discord server while she streams whatever horror game she had planned for the evening to her close to her thousands of viewers. 

“Don’t worry, Y/N! I’ll come with you, imma hold your hand the whole time.“ Clay volunteers wholeheartedly without a second to waste.

Much to his disappointment, however, Y/N’s reply to that is: “Not until you go wash off all that cheeto dust that’s all over your fingers.“

Clay gasps dramatically, “How DARE you? I offer you help and comfort and this is the thanks I get? I hope one of those heretics in teaches you a lesson!”

While the pair are now in a full-on ‘heated’ dispute on their manners and politeness, bringing back things they did wrong as far back as three years ago, George and Sapnap are just connecting the dots silently.

“Wait, Y/N...“ George is the one to finally speak up, “How’d you know he’s eating cheetos?”

Taking a momentary break from the bickering, Y/N reassumes her more sweet tone of voice as he addresses him, “He freaking raided my cabinets and has eaten all my snacks already! He’s only been here for two hours, damn it!”

“Don’t make it sound like I inhaled a mountain of snacks in two hours! You literally had only two bags of snacks - meant for one person, mind you!“ Clay argues back, neither him nor Y/N realizing that this accidental outing will send their fandoms in a fit.

Of course, people hang out at their friends’ all the time, nothing weird there. This wouldn’t have been such a big deal to anyone if Sapnap didn’t say:

“How come Clay has the privilege of coming over to place and George and I don’t?“

Oh boy...

                                                             *  *  *

“Hi everyone! I know you guys couldn’t care less for an intro so Imma get right into it...“ Y/N says, all seemingly in one breath, “You see this masked man next to me? This tree of a man right here? Yes? Good, well judging by that poorly made cardboard mask he’s wearing - curtsey of yours truly - you probably already know who he is. If not, meet Dream, aka Clay, aka the raincloud above my parade.“

That specific laugh echoes throughout the room as the said tree-of-a-man wraps an arm around the significantly smaller girl’s shoulders, pulling her closer till their sides collide, “She loves me, trust me, she does.”

“Only when you bring me food though.“ She corrects him, wiggling his shoulders to see if she could set herself free from his grip but relaxing in his embrace when she realizes she won’t be going anywhere unless he willingly lets her go.

Clay tilts his head to the side to look at her through the holes poked into the mask before lifting his free arm to reveal the plastic bag he’s been holding all this time. “Oh, well then I wonder what I’ve got over here...”

“Oh my God, Panda Express! You’re the best, Clay.“ She squeals, grabbing him by the collar of his hoodie and pulling him down while she simultaneously pushes up on her toes to place a kiss on his cheek which is a tiny bit exposed to her between the mask and the hood he’s got over his head.

Before the man could even recover, he finds himself empty handed, having lost the girl and having lost the bag of food to the girl.

That kiss was worth it though.

                                                             *  *  *

“Ok, so I’ve seen this ‘my girlfriend does my makeup’ challenge going around and since I’m single as all hell, I got my best friend Y/N here to do my makeup.“ Clay points to Y/N who’s holding a makeup bag in one hand and is giving him a very disappointed look, “Judging by the look on her face, she’s not at all impressed but I promise to make her a bit more excited to be here in editing.“

“Of course I’m unimpressed, this is the troll video of troll videos!“ She complains, throwing her arms up, “Sure I’ll do your makeup and get a kick out of it myself but none of them will see it!“ She points to the camera, “None of them will know what amazing makeup artist skills I’ve got.“

This leaves Clay speechless for a moment, uncertain of how to reply to her statement before just deciding to say: “Well, at least you’ll be getting a kick out of it, that’s all that matters to me.”

“Aww...“ Y/N bats her eyelashes at the camera as her bottom lip forms an emotional pout, “Please don’t be so sweet to me after I just verbally kicked your ass. You always do that and make me feel like the meanest person in the world.“

“Aww Y/N, I’m so sorry.“ He says, sounding genuinely apologetic as he wraps his arms around the girl that’s tiny in comparison to him, bringing her closer to him with his tight hug.

“YOU’RE DOING IT AGAIN!“

                                                             *  *  *

“Hey Clay, I bought lunch on the way so I hope you’re-” Walking into her friend’s recording room abruptly, Y/N finds herself face to face with his webcam, the light next to which is glowing, suggesting the device is on and she’s currently on the screens of the thousands of people watching Dream’s stream. His mask is on - the one she made for him - of course, but she can still feel the aura of him smiling, relieving her of the worry that he’ll be irritated by her walking in like that - unannounced and without knocking. To be fair, they never announced to one another when they’d be stopping by and by this point in their friendship they have also stopped knocking too. “You’re streaming, huh?”

“Yup!“ The word is said in such a teasing manner she almost allows herself to blush, “What you got there tho?“

“Chipotle.“ She answers shortly, “And I’m starving so can we please turn your stream into a Mukbang?“ She furrows her brows as she inspects what’s on his computer screen, looking at a comment section instead of the usual screen of a game she’s used to seeing. “What are you doing, anyway?“

Looking back at his screen for a brief moment before turning back to her, Clay replies, “Oh, just reading mean comments, as one does to boost their self-esteem.”

The flash of anger he sees on Y/N’s face is most certainly not what he was inspecting to see. Mockery, yes. Humor, yes. Faux sympathy followed by some mean comments of her own, definitely. But he anger he did not see coming at all.

“Who’s talking shit about you? I’ll end them!“ Putting the plastic bag of delicious food aside, forgetting all about it in the process, Y/N grabs a chair and drags it over next to Clay’s so she too can look at his screen.

And that boy has never felt so much adoration for his best friend. Their fans - and especially their shippers - would’ve lost it if they had been able to see the look he was giving her.

                                                             *  *  *

(back to the ‘girlfriend/best friend does my makeup vid’)

“Ok, so what kind of look do you want me to give you?“ Y/N asks as she sits down on the stool in front of Clay, her makeup products placed on the dining table which is to her right.

“You ask me as though I know what I want.“ Clay laughs, the sticker of his mask floating above his face, following his movements as to keep his features hidden, “Just do the look you do on yourself everyday. It looks really cute on you, who knows, I might be able to pull it off too.“

“Sure thing.“ She smiles at her friend’s compliment, “Just stand still, ok?“

“Yes, ma’am.“

                                                            *  *  *

“Y/N, no! Stop!“ Clay warns her via the Discord call while the two are streaming Minecraft together alone for once, “Not another word!“

“But I really do feel bad!“ Y/N whines in response, “Why don’t you allow me to apologize?“

“Because there’s nothing to apologize for!“ He says, clearly done with the conversation, “I willingly gave you my jacket, you didn’t ask for it.“

“And now you’ve got a cold because of it!“ She continues arguing her case, “The least I can do is come over to take care of you.“

“I don’t need a pity nurse, thank you very much.“ Clay bites back, “But your company would be nice. Though I don’t want you to catch whatever cold I have.“

“I’d catch any cold for you, Clay.“ She replies teasingly - with a ton of honesty underneath that teasing.

Honesty both her and Clay are aware of. As well as the mob of people watching their streams right now.

                                                             ~  ~  ~ And so the snowball effect continues with little moments sprinkled throughout their online presences that make the snowball of shipping get bigger and bigger. Every now and then, both Y/N and Clay let little bits of their true adoration and admiration for the other slip through. And time and time again do those moments send their fans in a frenzy. 

Rightfully so.

@kia-isabelle

[badhockeymom]

hey do u have any hockey-fic recommendations from ao3? 😊 (any kinds are welcomed; fluff, smut, nothing sexual, or anything in between)

I have so many! First, go check my (=caixa) bookmarks on ao3.

Then, because linking is a bitch, I searched my rec tag on my main blog (caixxa) and copy-pasted some here (some may be on my bookmarks too)

It’s long, warning!

–

lettering: a how-to by fyborg23 for caixa seriously deserves more love! i’ll gladly admit this has influenced the vibe of camera ready despite being a very different work - canon setting, different pov, mature rating (but the work is still sexy as hell and HOT!).  

“Sebby’s a heartbreaker” is a line permanently burned under my skin, so thank you for writing it to me, @hastybooks.  

(seb/rod)

–

Silk in the Boy - Men’s Hockey RPF [Archive of Our Own]By Organization for Transformative Works

So, guess who got a gift that makes me think that oh, I either DO write some pretty accurate requests or then somebody knows my taste embarrassingly well? Anyway, I’m grinning like an idiot. I may also be trash but ha fucking ha, if it gets me something like this then o-kay.

(seb/tt)

–

27. favorite fanfic author of the year

I’ve been a terribly inconsistent reader this year. I barely read more than one fic from one writer even if I love the story, and even when I love the story I don’t necessarily remember later whose it was.

Sorry!

That said, I DO have some that I can list here.

I will dearly miss bauer! I’m afraid she has grown tired of the hockey rpf fandom and is rediscovering herself somewhere else. I don’t know where that is and it sucks. I hope I’m jumping to conclusions and this is just a break, but her blog @bauerbump (the only porn blog I needed) is gone, the latest fic  Glad You Made It is from May and the two comments I left on that fic last week are unanswered.  European Son is also from this year and I read Little Red and Neck this year, too. Daring, often dark and twisted, brilliantly written.

raregoose / @raregoose wrote the best Patrik Laine fics (hockey rpf) I read this year,  do you think that i want too much? and  and possibly i like the thrill.

absinthine has written seb/teuvo fics that make me just green of envy, unfold and  waiting for the tides to meet. The same could be said about cjmasim for  wanted to believe that there was room for me.

–

1 and 24 for the fanfic ask thingy :)

1. favorite fic you wrote this year

I already answered this once and mentioned Tappiolla tappiin and  Letters from a new home to give two language options but I’ll take my chance and add  his boner is a foot-long concrete dildo because it exhilarates me that people love to read about leafs cheating, taking drugs and peeing on each other so much. I’m super glad I wrote and posted that quick little piece of filth because it regularly gives me a confidence boost by gathering new kudos.

(tappiolla tappiin is in finnish only! Letters from a new home is a plot-driven canes historical/supernatural AU fic and the last one marner/martin)

24. favorite fic you read this year

Seriously I’ve read many great fics and picking one favorite is hard! The ones in this post and this post are valid but I’ll add  OTGWG. because reading it really  picked me up on a horribly bad day. I was so thrilling to see a ship that I had created taking life in the hands of another, skilled writer. It would fit the Sour grapes universe seamlessly, it has exactly the same energy as the end of Pinot Noir and I couldn’t be more humbled or prouder if I had written it myself.

(otgwg and my own sour grapes series are seb/wardo fics)

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First, this is the one I praise every chance i get: Why we fight by lllookalive. An absolutely brilliant, beautiful, real, funny, exciting and sexy high school au. I was intrigued by the summary and am eternally grateful I started following the story even though in the beginning I hardly knew who most of the players the characters are based upon are.

In the fic Boston Bruins, Pittsburgh Penguins and Chicago Blackhawks are exceptionally cleverly transformed to rival high schools and their hockey teams, and the players pair up in most surprising ways. Players from other teams make frequent appearances, too - the ensemble is one of the widest I’ve met. For realism, there are straight and bi characters and I think it’s really cool. It’s beautifully written, the world-building and the characterization of these heart-breakingly teenage boys and their families is just phenomenal. Geno flirting to Patrice Bergeron by calling him Prince Patrice is some of the sweetest romance I’ve come across. And the smell of dill and rich yeasty rye bread dough in the kitchen of his Russian family restaurant! Oh!

I kind of wish I was still living the time this fic was posted twice a week, i really waited for the new update! Now it’s finished, all 78 chapters, more than 200 000 words.

Next, some quick sex & drugs. I was pleasantly surprised the other day when I found this, Start Real Slow by coricomile in my ao3 reading history, I thought I’d never find it again because I didn’t even remember what characters it had. (I was mildly disappointed to notice that it was another Toews/Kane fic, but what can you do, in hockey rpf you waddle through a sea of those (and Sid x Genos, Matts x Marns’s, tbh) to find anything else). But anyway, it was a hilariously written little piece of two rookies smoking weed and ending up experimenting on oral sex.

And speaking of Mitch Marner, || by bauer has one adventurous Leafs rookie, Matt Martin and some white lines.

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hope this helps! i’m too tired to edit this better and i hope some of the good ones not included in this post are in my bookmarks & not private.

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2, 7, 8, 20 ♡

Questions from this meme. Since you didn’t specify I’m just going to assume Yuzuvier, the OTP i mostly post about...

2. What song fits your pairing the most?

Oh man, it feels like I’m always listening to a song and thinking “this is so them.” The one that always ends up on my fic playlists is “Let It Be Me”, by Ray Lamontagne. A love song that’s about relying on the other person when times get tough? Perfect for a pairing that gives quotes like “all the effort we went through is something only the two of us know.” 

7. Favorite headcanon/trope idea?

Once again, I have no shortage of answers to this question... How about some that seem practically canon to me? Yuzu loves Javi’s big muscley arms, and Javi loves Yuzu’s tiny little waist. Yuzu’s really awful at texting Javi back. They spent the time in between the flower ceremony and the medal ceremony at Pyeongchang cuddling. And of course, my favorite headcanon that seems basically canon: Brian ships them a little and figures out they have feelings for each other wayyyyy before either one of them does.

8. Least favorite headcanon/trope?

Okay, so I have to preface this by saying all RPF is subjective - we don’t know these people, so any one of our interpretations could be correct! - and also that people should read and write whatever they want, I’m not the taste arbiter. And if you like the stuff I’m describing below, that doesn’t make you a bad person or mean I hate you. End disclaimer!

That being said, portrayals of Yuzu as being exclusively shy, sweet, retiring, a delicate flower, etc etc, really rub me the wrong way. He definitely has those components to his personality, but this is also a man who once jumped a triple axel because people were still applauding the scores of his rival. This is the same man who described himself as having “an unyielding spirit and a big mouth.” The very same guy that Dmitri Aliev doesn’t look at when they’re warming up because he’s just that intimidating. Yuzu is one stubborn, tough, weird, bratty little motherfucker, and when fic, fanart, and headcanons fail to account for this side of him as well as the gentle perfect angel side, I become less interested in them. This is partially because it feels like it fails to explore the totality of Yuzu, the thing that makes him so interesting - this combination of softness and strength, selfishness and generosity, stubbornness and willingness to listen. It also partially bothers me (especially when it’s paired with Tough Masculine Perfect Boyfriend Javi, another characterization that feels off for similar reasons) because it feels like there’s some unexamined assumptions about race/gender presentation/sexuality wrapped up in that. When we look at Yuzu and only see his soft side, and we look at Javi and only see his strong side, how much of that has to do with how we’re conditioned to view Asian men versus European men? How much of that has to do with the ways they present themselves on the ice, and our assumptions about what that means about their personalities? I hope we can all examine how much we buy into heteronormative and racist assumptions about what Javi and Yuzu are like and ask ourselves how to make our fanworks reflect their true complexity as people.

Phew, sorry, that was a lot. Don’t let me get up on a soapbox, I never get off....

20. What made you decide to ship them?

I got into figure skating right around Worlds 2017, so the moment that launched the ship was, of course, the moment Yuzu put his medal around Javi’s neck. How could you not ship two people who cared about each other that much? It was a great introduction to these sweet boys.