#you have to have a replacement for these things
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booasaur · 1 day ago
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Lots of ominous news nowadays, but there are good things too! Thailand's Marriage Equality Law took effect today!
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This tweet takes you to the top of a thread that lists all the changes, like replacing gendered terms like husband and wife with spouses, same-sex marriages have full legal status, same-sex couples can adopt and use IVF and create pre-nups, just a whole lot of steps to make them equal.
It's all just so amazing and joyous. They hosted a parade for the newlywed couples!
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drferox · 18 hours ago
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Pets are very commonly overweight. And very commonly the reason given will be ‘because my parents feed them more than they’re supposed to, and they won’t listen when I tell them to stop’.
And I sympathise. I understand. Parents are hard, especially when they still think of you as ‘their kid’ and not ‘grown adult with autonomy’. Getting your parent to change their behavior is very difficult.
My two cats have a scoop in their bag of food, and they get one scoop each for dinner. It’s a very simple system: 1 scoop 1 cat. If I notice they’re getting a bit podgy then I make the scoop a bit concave. If they’re looking a bit light, I give them a little extra breakfast. But dinner is always the same, never more than one scoop.
But last night I watch my mother (the very same woman that scolded me for my weight since I was ten) decide to feed the cats for me while I finished washing the dishes.
The cats follow her, mewing pathetically, as she carries the food bag to their bowls. And I watch, as she’s talking to me and making eye contact, while she gives one cat a slightly heaped scoop of food, and then the other.
And then, dear reader, she replaces the scoop into the bag, as though it’s the most natural thing in the world, and proceeds to give each cat an additional handful of food.
I was astounded. I was politely mortified that you just increased the cats’ meals by at least 80%. No wonder they’ve been podgy!
We had a polite but firm discussion about how that is a measured scoop in the bag, and have-you-been-feeding-that-much-the-whole-time, but I do not think she has listened. I think I will need to gently ban her from feeding the cats.
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rosegolden13 · 3 days ago
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TF-141 reacts to… your pregnancy pillow!!! (Ranked best to worst)
Gaz is the most mature about it. He’ll do anything to keep you happy and comfortable while you’re carrying his little one, even if that means he can’t hold you at night. He doesn’t take it personally and will even go with you to help you pick it out or research the best options online.
Price tolerates it. He makes a few grumbly comments (“are my arms not enough for you?”, “can’t even hold my wife?”, “‘m bein’ replaced by a bloody pillow”, “jus’ marry the pillow, why don’t ya?”) but quickly stops after he realizes how much more soundly you sleep with it. Your comfort is his top priority, even if he’s a little peeved that he can’t be the one to provide you that comfort. But the day you come home with the little one? You bet that pillow is stuffed deep in the attic, only to come out once you’re pregnant again.
Simon doesn’t outright protest the pillow *but* he doesn’t just sit by and let it happen either. The first night you use it, he waits til you’re asleep and then carefully disentangles the pillow from you to slide himself in its place. He physically can’t sleep without touching you in some way, knowing you’re safe beside him, so even when you scold him in frustration the next day, the pillow ends up on the floor night after night, either that or he’s reaching around it to hold onto any part of you.
Soap is undoubtedly the worst. He’s whining at the mere idea of the thing when you first bring it up. Clingy as he is, any separation from you is hell to him. He’s fully and unashamedly beefing with your pregnancy pillow. He will 1000% hide the damn thing (especially because you look so cute waddling around and looking for it). Eventually, he’ll take mercy on you, agreeing to let you have your pillow with a promise that you not get too attached to it because he’s throwing it out as soon as you come home with the baby.
I couldn't get this silliness out of my head... THE VOICES!!! This is super inspired by @quarterlifekitty series which is so good- go check her out rn rn rn.
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ptewie · 15 hours ago
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Okay, now that the hype has died down I just want to say that the general vibe of abject horror that Mr Foxington Tobias expressed about the simple fact that he had to make a song to act as a replacement for pepper steak is the realest thing I've ever seen. because like HOLY SHIT. how do you even BEGIN to approach that? i would have crashed out ngl. you want me to try to match up to pepper steak? pepper steak. pepper steak from OFF? you're insane. you might as well ask me to turn water into gold because you are asking me to do the impossible here. to capture pepper steak. pepper steak from off. the song pepper steak from OFF. what the fuck dude what the hell
i mean like, he fucking cooked regardless but you get what i mean
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no-144444 · 3 days ago
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soft launching (hard) -d.riccardo
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summary: you and daniel decide it's time the world know about you
pairing: daniel riccardo x fem! illman! mechanic! reader
(for context, kym illman is an f1 photographer from australia)
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Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. 
You were livid. You wanted to scream, to sob, to shout, everything. It wasn’t fair. You were exhausted, hours and hours of practice, hours and hours of expertise, and yet, Daniel had just crashed the car into the wall. You were usually quite good at turning off the ‘mechanic’ side of you to turn into the ��girlfriend’ but it was hard today. You’d worked overnight. You’d worked until you were practically falling asleep at the side of the car. 
And he crashed it. Again. 
You knew it wasn’t his fault.
It wasn’t his fault. 
You kept repeating that in your head. The looks on the faces of the other mechanics were… unwelcoming to say the least. You didn’t want Daniel to see them, or you. You walked on, ready to hide in the bathroom until Daniel got into his room. 
Then he saw you. Daniel had a certain way he liked to calm down after races. Shower, relax in bed for an hour with you, then back to the hotel for some food. 
You couldn’t do it. You knew you’d blow up on him. You knew you’d freak out. 
“Baby-” he started, running up to you and wrapping his arms around you. “I’m sorry.”
Your heart stopped. ‘Mechanic’ you, was gone. Replaced whole-heartedly by the need to comfort him and make sure he was alright. Yes, you still felt bad for the other mechanics and yourself, thinking about how you’d have to put it all back together in Milton Keynes. But Daniel needed you. 
“It’s alright,” you whispered, holding him close. “You’re alright baby.”
He nodded, his eyes wet with tears. He knew if he’d talk he’d break. 
“Does it hurt anywhere?” you asked, pulling him into his driver’s room. He shook his head. “Did you get checked out?”
He nodded. You sat him down on the bed. 
“It’s alright darling,” you whispered. “It’s Lance’s fucking fault anyway-”
“I don’t want to lose you if I lose this,” he responded bluntly, his hazel eyes filled with tears. “I know I can be better, I just… it feels like a classic case of old dog, new tricks, and I just can’t get the hang of it. If I could just get one shot at the RedBull seat, I know I could do it. I just… it feels like shit battling it out at the back for one point. I used to stand at the top of podiums, and now I’m… this,” he sighed, discouraged. 
“You won’t lose me,” you assured him, running your hands through his hair and he leaned his head against your stomach. He loved sitting like this, his head on your stomach as you stood in front of him. “I’m not going to let you go, don’t ever worry about that.” 
“I do,” he admitted. 
“Then talk to me about it,” you told him, pulling his chin up so he had to look at you. “I am here for you no matter what. Always and forever, Dan.”
“You swear?” he asked. 
"I swear."
୨ৎ⋅୨ৎ You were there when he got the call. He sobbed for hours. You were both there, just laying in your bed, holding him as he cried. For the first week, it was rough. He barely got up. You helped him. You made him food, made him get up and walk, made him shower. He was grateful to have you there, because he didn’t know what he would’ve done without you. He probably would’ve sulked for months. But you, you brought him out, brought him home, brought him to see Josh and Hailee. You even bought him a hat (his new favourite) that says ‘retired!’. You made him happy again. Yes, there were still down days, and yes, he still looked at his trophies longingly. But he had other things in mind too. He wondered a lot about how you’d look in a wedding dress, or how you’d both look with a baby in your arms. He was finally thinking about the future for once, and he felt like slowing down, for the first time in his life, was just as exciting as going fast.
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Being in F1 when Danny wasn't was hard. He was your boyfriend, and it meant you didn't get to see him all the time anymore. You still adored your job, so you weren't going to quit, just... step back a bit. The season came to an end, you were 7th in the constructors, and off you went skiing with half the grid.
The funny thing about the fact that you were a mechanic, was the fact that your father was one of the main photographers in F1. You'd picked up that skill from him, and you usually jsut took photos of your friends, but to cut costs RedBull had asked you to be their on-track photographer as well, and you'd gained quite the reputation.
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ynillman
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liked by pierregasly, jackdoohan, landonorris and 4,987,736 others
ynillman: 2024 is over and done with! I cannot wait to have a regular sleep schedule for three months!
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kymillman legendary photos this year! see you at christmas, and enjoy skiing! liked by yourusername
landonorris PLZZ LET US BORROW YOU NEXT YEAR -> ynillman maybe... but even I can't make papaya look good 🤷
lancestroll time to hit the slopes! -> ynillman bro i broke my fucking arm last time wtf -> lancestroll let's hope you break both of them this time! maybe then you won't capture another video of me falling!
oscrapiastri thank u for your service, lily is very happy with our couples photos! -> ynillman anything for lily! so happy for the two of you! -> user89 did we miss something...? ->user829: oscar did say he'd rather get married than get a tattoo...
user88: when's the next yt video queen??? -> ynillman tomorrow!
nicohulkenberg amazing work this year!
olliebearman thanks for the great photos this year!
jackdoohan thank you for making me not chop all my hair off again! (oh, and the photos were cool as well ig) liked by ynillman
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ynillman
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liked by pierregasy, charlesleclerc, danielriccardo, and 8,098,364 others
ynillman didn't break an arm this year, only my ego!
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user8 lance serving boyfriend in this so hard
user99 hear me out, lance and y/n... -> user7 yes officer, it's this one -> user882 me when i'm clinically insane -> lancestroll prolly not.... -> ynillman please guys I have some standards
oscarpiastri i swear i was so surprised you didn't kill yourself
landonorris you're genuinely a danger to society on a snowboard -> ynillman because of my skills? -> landonorris because you can't fucking use one. I have the bruises to prove it
user83 lando, lance, oscar, and y/n????? what the fuck is this multiverse of madness
user0 still serving with the photos OMG QUEEN
estebanocon remind me to never go skiing with you again -> user82 estie bestie!!!!!!
mickschumacher who tf let her out of her cage? -> jackdoohan you did. you gave her the vodka.
user9: jack, mick, esteban, lance, lando, oscar, and yn? who else??? -> charlesleclerc i was there too -> alexalbon same -> carlosainz same -> francocolapinto me too! -> danielriccardo same... -> user9: and all of their wags were there too! what a cool friend group!
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lilymunihe
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liked by alexalbon, ynillman, alexandrastmleux and 890,876 others
lilymunihe guess who took these photos? @.ynillman
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landonorris that's actually a normal sized bear in Alex's hands -> alexalbon so you're calling me tall? thanks??? -> landonorris fuck no, i meant a regular sized teddy bear
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ynillman
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liked by robertirwin, pierregasly, francocolapinto and 9,987,625 others
ynillman new video out with robbie! (my sleep schedule is still fucked someone save me) (i love australia(ns))
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danielriccardo what a group of legends -> ynillman aka you're jealous i didn't invite you? -> user8239 y/ndaniel CRUMBS !!!!!
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danielriccardo
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liked by ynillman, francocolapinto, fernandoalonso and 987,253 others
danielriccardo she's looking beautiful these days. missed home :)
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user8240 yall know who else is in australia this week... -> user247 i am picking up what you're putting down... delusion!
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danielriccardo
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caption: you think she likes the bay?
dms
landornorris SOFT LAUNCH?
oscarpiastri taking the soft launch approach?
alexalbon BOO HARD LAUNCH YOU'VE BEEN TOGETHER FOREVER
lewishamilton mate if you don't hard launch her i'll do it wtf is this bullshit
yukistunoda bro... try harder.
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Daniel had decided something, which was almost always a dangerous idea. It was the off-season, you were in Australia to see the sights, see family, and catch some waves. He'd made his mind up about something days ago, and you'd been trying to figure out what, but he wouldn't budge. He was secretive and giddy, and slightly more childish than usual, so naturally, you started to panic.
That all changed when he brought you down to the beach. There were candles set up everywhere, he was smiling, and you were crying already.
"Y/n, you have made me the happiest man in the past four years," he smiled, despite the way his voice cracked with emotion. "You've been with me through everything. You've held me on the nights I've been my weakest, and championed me on the days I've been my best. I never asked you to love me, but you do it like it's breathing. You make the ups and downs feel like goosebumps on my arm, instead of mountainous waves. You make me smile. You make me laugh. You make me feel so fucking stupid when you start explaining something to do with engineering, and I realise I couldn't do that. The way you dedicate yourself to things is incredible. The way you treat others with kindness and respect even when they don't deserve it, is commendable. I love you with every bone, every nerve, and every cell in my body. I love everything about you, inside and out. I can't wait to get to sit in a front porch someday when we're old and wrinkly, and still get to tell people that you're my wife. So, Y/n, will you marry me?"
You nodded through tears,. pulling him up off one knee and kissing him harshly, only pulling back to look at the ring.
"I love you too," you smiled through tears. "I love you so much."
"I love you so much more," he smiled, elated that you'd said yes. "You saved me."
And that was that. You were were engaged.
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danielriccardo
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liked by landonorris, ynillman, liamlawson, and 893,273 others
danielriccardo she was there for me through thick and thin, and she still likes me years later. you swore you wouldn't get rid of me, so i'm here to stay! love you more than anything, my love, my life, my (future) wife!
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landonorris HARD LAUNCH
robertirwin So happy for you guys!
oscarpiastri must come and visit you two oldies
maxverstappen man had been stolen... kidding! (not) Very happy for you two! (not).
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navigation for my blog :)
redbull and vcarb masterlist
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dante-mightdie · 24 hours ago
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my take on divorced!john fancying the nanny <3
he’s not fully in the clear yet. he’s separated from husband wife, she’s fully moved out and signed over custody of their son to him. all they’re waiting on is the divorce papers to be rustled up
it’s not uncommon for him to ask you to stay for days on end, caring for his son and watching over his home when he’s away on short-term deployment. more than happy to pay whatever it costs him. always comes home to spotless house and his boy ready to greet him at the door
except this time, when the mission wrapped up earlier than expected. his flight landing in at an ungodly hour so his arrival is unknown to you. the house is dark when he gets in, dead quiet just as he expected considering how late it is in the night
his footsteps are light, even lighter once he starts tripping over toys and his son’s playpen still strewn about in the front room. he’s not used to coming home to this with you about. he’s not mad by any means, but he can definitely feel the added personal touch you’ve let lingering on his home
he finds an empty tub of ice cream on the coffee table, his ice cream to be specific. it was unopened when he left and here it sits in front of the tv with the spoon still in it.
cheeky, he thinks. he begins to wonder how much of his stuff you pinch and replace before he gets home. he’ll make sure to tease you on that in the morning, watch you fluster before he laughs and ruffles your hair. ensuring you that you can have whatever you want of his, darlin’
when he stops in the bathroom to shower, he finds your bras and panties hanging up to dry next to the medicine cabinet. he can’t help the way it makes his stomach twist in a deliciously achy way. not because of the juvenile inclination that he’s seen your undergarments
but because they’re yours, and they’re hanging up in his en-suite bathroom. makes him wonder where you’ve been sleeping for a good few seconds before he actually switches on the bedroom light and sees his covers strewn about
another secret of yours revealed to soon. you’d complained about the sofa being uncomfortable to sleep on when he was away in a passing comment. his original plan was to buy a more comfortable pull out bed for his office
but this is much better. his sweet nanny curled up in his bed, drooling into his pillows. what side do you sleep on? do you occupy the place which originally belonged to his ex-wife? or do you stuff your face into his pillows, breathing in his musky scent?
he only wishes you didn’t wash the sheets before he came home :(
he finds you in the nursery, curled up on the rocking chair with a blanket on your lap and a book hugged close to your chest. snoozing peacefully alongside his son who was dozing in his crib. he checks on the infant, pressing a kiss to his forehead before making his way to you
the book you’re reading is the one he’d left on his bedside table with his reading glasses. some non-fiction book about the Cold War he reads before bed. he tucks it under his arm before reaching down to scoop your sleeping form up from the rocking chair
the blanket once covering you slips off, pooling at his feet and it takes everything in him not to let out a groan and wake you up when he sees you sleeping in nothing over this his boxers and his old lieutenants t-shirt
the engraved ‘Price’ branding your chest is simply an omen of good things to come :)
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crookedteethed · 2 days ago
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ᥫ᭡. that time you got period blood in rafe's bed.
warnings: nothing but fluff and that time of the month shenanigans
a/n: brain wouldn't shut up tonight, so here's some soft rafe cameron for you girlies. 🤍
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You wake up to that familiar cramping sensation and immediately know.
Your eyes snap open in horror, taking in the expensive Egyptian cotton sheets beneath you – Rafe's sheets. Rafe's very white, very expensive sheets that now have a very obvious stain.
"Shit," you whisper, mortification flooding your system as you try to quietly extract yourself from his arms without waking him.
"Mmm, where are you going." His sleep-rough voice catches you mid-escape attempt. Before you can stop him, he's pulling you back against his chest, nuzzling into your neck.
"Rafe, no – I need to—" But it's too late. You feel the exact moment he realizes, his body stilling behind you.
"I'm so sorry," you start rambling, trying to wiggle free. "I know how expensive these sheets are. I'll replace them, I swear—"
"Hey." His voice has that edge to it, the one that means you're being ridiculous. "Look at me."
You shake your head, face burning. "I ruined your sheets."
"Baby girl." There's amusement in his voice now. "You really think I give a fuck about some sheets?" His lips find your temple. "You hurting?"
The gentle question beneath his usual rough exterior makes your chest tight. You nod slightly.
"Alright, here's what's happening." It's his business voice, the one that means no arguments. "You're gonna take a hot shower, steal whatever you want from my closet, and I'm grabbing you some aspirin." He pauses. "And those chocolate strawberries in the fridge? Yeah, those weren't for tomorrow's country club bullshit."
You look up at him, surprised. "You knew?"
The corner of his mouth quirks up. "Princess, you really think I don't have your cycle tracked? Who do you think keeps restocking the tampons under my sink?"
You resist the urge to roll your eyes. Of course he'd be smug about being thoughtful. Your heart then does that stupid flutter thing it always does when he shows he actually pays attention.
Later, curled up on his ridiculously expensive couch, wearing his softest hoodie, you watch him navigate your heating pad with intense focus. The chocolate strawberries are perfect, and every time a cramp hits, his hand finds your lower back like it's instinct.
"Better?" he murmurs against your hair.
"Mmm." You sink further into him. "Still sorry about the sheets though."
He snorts. "Baby, I could buy new sheets every day for the next decade and not dent my wallet." His arms tighten possessively. "Now shut up about the sheets and eat your chocolate."
You turn to look at him, this man who tracks your period in his phone but would probably murder anyone who knew about it. This version of Rafe Cameron – the one who handles period stains and midnight cramps with the same intensity he handles everything else – is just for you.
"I love you," you whisper.
"Yeah?" That signature smirk plays at his lips. "Prove it by stopping this guilt shit about my sheets."
But his kiss is gentle, and when another cramp hits, his hands are already there, steady and sure.
What Figure Eight would never believe: how the infamous Rafe Cameron keeps tampons in his bathroom and period tracking apps on his phone.
But that's okay – let them have their trust fund tyrant. This softer version is yours alone.
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grimmweepers · 3 days ago
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— ☆ contents: dealing with dragon!form zhongli who possesses cat-like behaviours. human reader. dragon husband. sfw. fluff. established relationship. might be a little ooc. this is very unserious. 0.6k. | masterlist (i’m a dark content blog so mdni).
Dragon!Zhongli who acts much like an affectionate housecat despite his towering size and the magnitude of his status.
He, who is so comfortable around his human partner that he isn't afraid to bear his dragon form day-to-day, lest his cat-like behaviours (endearing as they are) go unnoticed.
Every time you run your fingers through the silk of his dark locks or scratch at the base of his horns, that's when it starts. A deep, soothing vibration beneath his scaled chest. The low rumble is almost hypnotic as his amber eyes drift closed, lulling him (and yourself) into a state of ease. If you remain watchful, you'll catch the corners of his lips curl ever-so-slightly upwards.
You can’t help but giggle because you know it’s not quite purring, but it might as well be.
Dragon!Zhongli whose tail is as much part of his personality as his deep voice and eloquent spiels. First and foremost, that thing is unapologetically heavy. When he’s in a good mood, it swishes around lazily, thumping against the furniture or brushing against your legs as he walks by.
Once it knocked over an entire stack of books and while you were busy laughing, he just sighed and said, “An unfortunate accident.” But if he’s feeling especially affectionate? Even worse. That's when you really have to watch out. It possessively curls around you and suddenly you’re dealing with the weight of a solid tail pulling you closer to him. You’ve almost toppled over a few times because of it.
���Careful, Zhongli,” you’ll tell him. “You might end up sweeping me off my feet.” Then he chuckles at you, tail tightening around your waist just a smidge.
That’s the idea, of course.
Dragon!Zhongli who feigns annoyance every time you act on your favourite habit: lifting his lips to inspect his fangs.
They’re a far cry from the tiny, delicate teeth of a cat, which is the only other creature you’ve subjected to this odd little inspection but that makes them even more fascinating.
"Must you do this every time?" he asks, lips pulling back just enough for you to admire them. They were sharp, pristine, and unsettlingly perfect. Enough to crack a bone with a single snap of his jaw but it was the same mouth he kissed you with. You never got used it.
"I'm lucky you’ve never nicked me with these," you’ll tease, brushing your finger along the largest fang.
Zhongli's responses are always the same: a long exhale as if you've just asked him to recite every contract he's ever known (which he could btw), followed by, “You’re enamoured with the oddest things.” But he lets you do it anyway. His words begin lose a bit of their weight when his tail slowly starts swaying behind him, exposing that he’s enjoying it more than he lets on.
And no one will ever believe you when you tell them how he is when he's feeling playful. It's a rarity but he'll nudge you gently with his horns as a display of affection and if you don't respond right away, he'll flick his tail at you. Not hard but enough for you to look his way.
Pay attention to me, it seems to say.
It’s mischievous, even if for a moment. Then you’ll catch a glint in his eye while he pretends to be all composed, but truly, he finds it amusing how he easily this form could be used as a weapon against you when he warrants his own needs.
The mighty dragon, who can command the earth itself, is stripped of his grandeur when you're around, replaced by a creature who wants nothing more than to be with you in the simplest way. And if you mention it, he’ll give you that look of half exasperation and half fondness before pulling you closer and acting like it’s purely your fault he’s such a softie with you.
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a/n: if it wasn’t obvious already, i am a cat person (๑ᵔ⤙ᵔ๑)
© 2025 grimmweepers — do not repost, copy, translate, modify my work on any platform
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lizziesangel · 2 days ago
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can you do another one shot of introverted reader and extroverted qb Rafe and he just follows her around and still crushes on her and then he like asks her out or something you can make this in your own way
finally part two!! ⟢ part one
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as the self-defense unit wraps up, you and lana grab your things and head toward the locker rooms. the air between you is lighter now, the drills and awkward encounters behind you—for the moment, at least. lana nudges you with her shoulder, her mischievous grin already in place.
“did you see what happened to jason in the middle of class?” she asks, barely containing her laughter. “i mean, secondhand embarrassment doesn’t even begin to cover it.”
you stifle a laugh, glancing over at her. “what did he think was going to happen? asking mia out in the middle of the drills? who even does that?”
lana throws her hands up dramatically. “exactly! like, dude, we’re learning how to escape a chokehold, and he’s over here trying to escape the friend zone. bad timing, jason. bad. timing.”
you snort, unable to hold back your amusement. “and then mia’s face? she looked like she wanted the ground to swallow her whole.”
“she didn’t even say anything! she just shook her head and walked away!” lana cackles, practically doubling over as she recalls the moment. “poor guy stood there for a solid ten seconds, looking like he’d just been hit by a bus.”
“it was funny,” you admit, “but also kind of sad. like, imagine building up all that courage just to get publicly rejected.”
lana shakes her head, still giggling. “i mean, yeah, i felt bad for him. for, like, half a second. but you have to admit, it was iconic. mia didn’t even blink.”
you laugh, the image replaying in your mind, but then lana’s smirk takes on a different edge. she gives you a sly look, and you immediately know you’re in trouble.
“speaking of moments,” she begins, dragging out the words, “what’s going on with you and rafe cameron?”
your laughter dies in your throat, replaced by a groan. “oh my gosh, lana. nothing is going on.”
“nothing?” she echoes, raising an eyebrow. “girl, he was staring at you like you were the answer to all of life’s questions. and don’t even try to deny it—i saw it.”
you roll your eyes, trying to play it cool. “he wasn’t staring. he was just… focused on the drill.”
“focused on you,” she corrects, wagging a finger at you. “i mean, i can’t blame him. you two looked like the cover of some YA romance novel over there, all wrist grabs and lingering eye contact.”
“lana, oh my gosh, stop.” you shove her lightly, your face burning. “it’s not like that.”
“oh, but you wish it was?” she teases, wiggling her eyebrows.
“no!” you insist, laughing despite yourself. “you’re so annoying.”
lana grins triumphantly, but before she can press further, you narrow your eyes and shift the spotlight. “okay, let’s talk about you and topper, then.”
her smug expression falters. “what about me and topper?” she asks, feigning innocence.
you mimic her earlier teasing tone. “oh, nothing. just that you were blushing a lot while you two were partnered up. and don’t even try to deny it—i saw it.”
“i was not blushing,” she huffs, but her face betrays her, turning pink at the accusation.
“you so were!” you shoot back, laughing. “and don’t think i didn’t notice how he kept leaning in to talk to you, all ‘are you okay? is my grip too tight?’”
“okay, first of all, he was just being polite,” lana retorts, crossing her arms. “second of all, you’re deflecting.”
“am i, though?” you challenge, raising an eyebrow. “because it sounds to me like someone has a little crush.”
lana groans, throwing her head back dramatically. “fine! whatever! he’s cute, okay? but he’s also topper thornton, which means he’s probably, like, ninety percent annoying and ten percent tolerable.”
you smirk. “sounds like someone’s trying to justify their feelings.”
“and it sounds like someone’s avoiding the fact that rafe cameron was basically undressing them with his eyes,” she fires back.
the two of you dissolve into laughter, your playful banter echoing down the hallway. for all the awkwardness of the class, you can’t help but feel grateful for moments like this—light, ridiculous, and completely you.
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it’s been a week since the self-defense class, but you’d be lying if you said you hadn’t thought about rafe cameron since then. not that you’d admit it to lana.
she’d never let you hear the end of it. right now, though, you’re trying to focus on your spanish class, scribbling notes as señor martinez drones on about verb conjugations. lana is sitting to your left, doodling absentmindedly in her notebook, while rafe is on your right, leaning back in his chair with a bored expression that says he’d rather be anywhere else.
you try not to notice how close he’s sitting. or how his cologne lingers faintly in the air. definitely not noticing.
“señor cameron,” señor martinez suddenly says, breaking through the hum of your thoughts. you glance up to see the older man staring pointedly at rafe, his thick-rimmed glasses slipping down his nose. “por favor, conteste esta pregunta. ¿cómo se dice, ‘i like to play football’ en español?”
rafe blinks, his posture straightening slightly. you can tell from the way his brow furrows that he has no idea what the answer is. he shifts in his seat, his gaze darting toward you briefly before landing back on the teacher.
“uh…” he starts, clearly stalling. “yo… gusta… uh…”
you glance at him out of the corner of your eye, trying not to laugh at his obvious struggle. he looks genuinely panicked now, scratching the back of his neck like it’ll somehow help him come up with the right words.
without thinking, you lean slightly toward him and scribble on the edge of your notebook: me gusta jugar al fútbol.
sliding the notebook closer to him with your left hand, you tap the words lightly with your pen before sitting back, acting like nothing happened. rafe’s eyes dart to the paper, and then to you. he catches on quickly, his lips twitching into a small, grateful smile.
“me gusta jugar al fútbol,” he repeats, his pronunciation a little off but passable. he looks up at señor martinez, who nods approvingly.
“muy bien, señor cameron,” the teacher says before moving on to the next victim in his line of questioning.
rafe exhales quietly, and you feel his shoulder brush yours as he leans closer, whispering just loud enough for you to hear. “thanks. i owe you one.”
you shrug, keeping your eyes on your notebook. “you’ll survive.”
“yeah, because of you,” he says, his tone teasing but sincere. you can feel his gaze lingering on you, and your cheeks warm involuntarily.
lana, who has been unusually quiet, suddenly clears her throat dramatically. “i see you two are getting along nicely,” she whispers, her voice dripping with mock innocence.
you nudge her under the desk with your foot, shooting her a warning look. “focus, lana.”
“oh, i am,” she replies with a grin, glancing pointedly between you and rafe.
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you and lana walk out of spanish class, your bags slung over your shoulders as you weave through the bustling hallway. the faint smell of old textbooks and cleaning supplies lingers in the air, blending with the hum of chatter from other students.
“so,” lana says, adjusting the strap of her bag and glancing at you, “are we pretending that señor martinez’s lecture didn’t put the entire class to sleep?”
you snort. “you mean only you? i saw you zoning out halfway through.”
“hey, i was conserving my energy,” she defends, holding up her hands. “that conjugation nonsense was not giving what it needed to give.”
you laugh softly, shaking your head as the two of you make your way toward your lockers. the conversation shifts to weekend plans, lana animatedly describing some pop-up event she wants to drag you to, when someone passes by on your right.
it’s him.
“hey,” he says, his voice breaking through your conversation like a gentle ripple. he’s walking just slow enough to catch your attention without completely stopping. “thanks for earlier. you saved me with that spanish sentence.”
he flashes you a smile—not the usual cocky smirk you’ve seen him give other people, but something softer, genuine. the kind that makes your chest tighten unexpectedly.
“oh, uh, no problem,” you manage to say, your voice steady despite the warmth creeping up your neck.
he gives a small nod, the corners of his mouth tugging upward just a little more, and then continues walking past you, blending into the crowd.
lana waits until he’s out of earshot before turning to you, her eyebrows raised and her grin positively devious. “okay. what was that?”
you roll your eyes, trying to play it cool. “he was just saying thank you.”
“mmm, sure,” she says, drawing out the words. “because guys like rafe cameron totally go out of their way to say thank you for help in class.”
“it’s called being polite,” you counter, though your voice wavers slightly, betraying your attempt at indifference.
“polite?” lana mimics, her voice dripping with mockery. “girl, he smiled at you like you just solved all his problems. that was not polite; that was something else.”
you shake your head, biting back a smile. “you’re ridiculous.”
“am i?” she teases, bumping her shoulder into yours. “or am i just really good at spotting crush vibes when i see them?”
you groan, quickening your pace to escape her relentless teasing, but the fluttery feeling in your chest doesn’t go away.
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a few days rolls by, and it’s time for PE again. the memory of last week’s self-defense unit still lingers in your mind, though you’ve done your best to push it aside. unfortunately, lana hasn’t let you live it down.
“back to the battlefield,” she says dramatically as you walk into the gym together, her water bottle swinging in her hand. “do you think coach davis will make us pair up the same way as last time?”
you glance at her, trying to gauge whether she’s genuinely curious or just looking for an opportunity to tease you again. “i don’t know,” you reply, keeping your tone casual. “probably. he seems like a ‘stick to the plan’ kind of guy.”
lana smirks, nudging you lightly. “good news for you, then.”
“what’s that supposed to mean?” you ask, feigning innocence as you open your water bottle and take a sip.
“oh, nothing,” she replies with a sly grin. “just that a certain quarterback might be looking forward to this more than you think.”
“ooh, look,” lana adds in a whisper, nudging you with her elbow as you make your way toward your spot. “there’s your favorite partner.”
you glance over instinctively and spot rafe standing with the rest of the football team. he’s tossing a basketball between his hands, chatting with topper and a couple of others, looking relaxed and completely at ease.
you try not to linger too long, but as if sensing your gaze, he looks up and meets your eyes. his lips curve into a small, knowing smile, and you quickly look away, your heart doing an unintentional somersault.
“stop it,” you mutter to lana, who’s practically vibrating with excitement at your reaction.
“i’m not even doing anything,” she says innocently, though the smug look on her face says otherwise.
you roll your eyes, but before you can fire back, coach davis claps his hands together, gathering the class’s attention.
“alright, folks!” he booms. “we’re picking up where we left off last week. same pairs, same drills, new moves.”
lana shoots you a triumphant look, barely able to contain her laugh. “told you.”
“shut up,” you mutter under your breath, your cheeks already warming as you glance toward the corner of the gym. sure enough, there’s rafe, standing with the other football players, tossing a basketball between his hands and looking entirely unbothered by the world around him.
when your name is called, followed by rafe’s, you take a deep breath and start walking toward him, feeling Lana’s smug gaze on your back the entire way.
“guess it’s us again,” he says, stopping in front of you. his tone is casual, but there’s a glimmer of amusement in his eyes.
“lucky me,” you reply, trying to sound neutral as you set your water bottle on the floor, though your voice comes out a little more sarcastic than you intended.
he chuckles, his hands resting lightly on his hips. “you say that like it’s a bad thing.”
you roll your eyes but can’t help the small smile tugging at your lips.
“ready for round two?” he asks, his tone teasing but warm. there’s a flicker of something in his eyes—maybe amusement, maybe anticipation—but you don’t dwell on it for long.
“i’m ready if you are,” you reply, trying to match his confidence.
this week’s drills involve more complex moves—blocking, evading, and redirecting. rafe listens to coach davis’s explanation but keeps sneaking glances at you, like he’s more interested in your reaction than the actual instructions. you catch him once, and he quickly looks away, scratching the back of his neck with a sheepish grin.
when it’s time to practice, rafe takes his position in front of you, his hands raised slightly. “alright, let’s see what you’ve got.”
you narrow your eyes playfully. “don’t go easy on me.”
his grin widens. “wouldn’t dream of it.”
the first few attempts are clumsy, just like last week, but this time, there’s an unspoken ease between you. the tension feels lighter, replaced by a strange sort of rhythm. when you stumble on one of the blocks, rafe catches your arm instinctively, steadying you without a second thought.
“you okay?” he asks, his voice soft.
“yeah,” you reply quickly, brushing it off. “just lost my balance.”
“good thing i’m here, then,” he says, his grin returning. he’s teasing, but there’s a sincerity in his tone that makes your stomach flip.
as the drill continues, you notice how his confidence contrasts with the careful way he moves around you, never pushing too hard, always adjusting to your pace. it’s almost… considerate. by the end of the session, you’re both slightly out of breath, your cheeks flushed—not just from the exercise.
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rafe is surprisingly focused, following coach’s instructions and helping you figure out the movements without making it awkward—well, mostly. he adjusts his stance a couple of times, his hands hovering near your arms to guide you, but he never oversteps, which you appreciate.
“alright, now try shifting your weight forward,” he says, watching as you attempt to push him off balance.
you give it your best shot, planting your feet and leaning into the motion, but he barely moves, his footing solid.
“okay, not bad,” he says, grinning. “but maybe try using a little more…” he pauses, clearly searching for the right word.
“force?” you supply, raising an eyebrow.
“yeah, that.” he nods, his grin widening. “don’t be afraid to go for it.”
you try again, this time putting more effort into the movement. to your surprise, he actually stumbles back a step, his expression shifting to mock surprise.
“whoa—okay,” he says, holding up his hands in surrender. “you’ve got some hidden strength there.”
you laugh despite yourself, shaking your head. “yeah, sure. i’m terrifying.”
“hey, i’m just saying,” he replies, his tone teasing. “remind me not to mess with you.”
lana, paired with topper a few feet away, catches the exchange and immediately starts making faces at you behind rafe’s back. you shoot her a glare, mouthing stop while trying not to laugh.
“what’s so funny?” rafe asks, glancing between you and lana.
“nothing,” you say quickly, straightening up and avoiding his gaze.
laa smirks, her voice carrying just enough for you to hear. “oh, it’s definitely something.”
you groan inwardly, already dreading whatever teasing lana has planned for later. for now, though, you focus on the drill, pretending not to notice the way rafe’s smile lingers just a little
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the end of class rolls around, and as everyone starts clearing up and heading toward the locker rooms, rafe lingers near you, casually adjusting the strap of his gym bag. lana notices, of course, and shoots you a knowing look before wandering off toward the door with topper trailing behind her.
you sling your water bottle over your shoulder, about to follow, when rafe steps a little closer. “hey,” he says, his tone casual but with just a hint of hesitation.
“hi,” you reply, glancing up at him curiously.
“so, uh…” he rubs the back of his neck, his usual confidence slipping for just a moment. “are you going to the game tonight?”
you blink, caught a little off guard. “the football game?”
“yeah,” he gives a short laugh, as if there’s any other game he could be talking about. “i mean, it’s kind of a big one. with a rival school and all that.”
you chew on your lip, considering. “ah, i don’t know. i haven’t really thought about it.”
“oh, come on,” he says, a teasing edge creeping into his tone. “i’m playing tonight.”
“i know,” you say with a faint laugh. “you’re the captain.”
there’s a flicker of something in his eyes—maybe amusement, maybe something else entirely. “right. so… you’ll come?”
before you can answer, lana reappears, practically materializing out of thin air. “we’ll be there!” she announces brightly, cutting off whatever excuse you were about to come up with.
your head snaps toward her, eyes wide. “we will?”
“yeah,” lana says, completely unbothered by your subtle glare. “wouldn’t miss it.”
rafe’s grin widens, his gaze flickering between you and lana. “great. see you tonight, then.”
just as you’re about to protest—or at least question why lana is suddenly speaking for you—topper walks by, overhearing the last bit of the conversation. he stops, turning to lana with a raised eyebrow.
“you’re going to the game?” he asks, his tone curious but laced with something else, something like amusement.
lana tilts her head at him, a playful smirk dancing on her lips. “why? you don’t want me there?”
topper stares at her for a second, then shakes his head, the corner of his mouth twitching into a half-smile. “no, i didn’t say that.”
“good,” lana replies breezily, flipping her hair over her shoulder. “because we’ll be there.”
topper blinks, momentarily at a loss for words, before recovering with a lopsided grin. “cool. yeah. that’s… cool.”
you glance between them, unsure whether to roll your eyes or laugh. meanwhile, rafe is still standing next to you, watching the whole exchange unfold with an amused look on his face.
“see you tonight,” rafe says again, this time directing it more toward you. his voice is quieter, as if it’s just for you, and there’s something in his tone that makes your stomach flip.
“yeah,” you manage, your voice a little softer than you intended. “see you.”
rafe’s grin widens, his eyes lighting up in a way that makes your chest tighten. “great. see you then.”
as he walks away with topper, lana nudges you with her elbow, a mischievous glint in her eye.
“you’re welcome,” she says, grinning.
“oh my gosh, did you see the way he was looking at you? you’re so going to that game.”
“lana,” you groan, but she’s already steering you toward the door, topper trailing behind like a lost puppy.
“oh, and topper?” lana calls over her shoulder. “you’d better actually play well tonight if i’m showing up.”
topper laughs, running a hand through his hair. “don’t worry, i’ll make it worth your while.”
“you’re welcome, by the way,” she says, grinning.
“for what?” you ask, even though you already know where this is going.
“getting us prime seats to watch your boy play tonight,” she teases.
you groan, shaking your head. “he’s not my—”
“oh, save it,” she interrupts, laughing. “i’m just saying, this is gonna be very entertaining.”
you shoot lana a look, but she just grins, completely unfazed. “you realize your boy is going to be there as well.”
“ahhh, this is going to be so much fun,” she says, and for some reason, you can’t help but smile too.
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you and lana are in her room, sorting through her closet to find something suitable for the football game. clothes are strewn across her bed, some tossed on the floor, and lana is holding up a navy sweater against herself in the mirror.
“what about this? casual but cute, right?” she asks, turning to you.
“it’s cute,” you say, trying not to laugh at the chaos around you. “but are we really dressing up for a football game?”
lana shoots you a look. “first of all, yes. second of all, you need to look extra cute. for a special reason.”
lana holds up a cropped sweater, frowning. “do i go with this? or the green one with the little buttons?”
“the green one,” you say without hesitation. “it makes your eyes pop.”
she nods thoughtfully, tossing the sweater onto a growing pile of rejected options. “okay, green it is. what about you? you can’t just show up in your usual jeans and hoodie. this is a game. there’s a whole vibe.”
before you can respond, lana’s younger sister amalia bursts into the room, a bundle of energy as always. she’s clutching a bowl of popcorn, her hair in a loose braid. at fifteen, she has that untamed curiosity that makes her impossible to ignore.
“what’s going on in here?” amalia asks, plopping down on the floor and grabbing one of lana’s discarded sneakers.
“getting ready for the game,” lana says, tossing the sweater onto the bed and grabbing a scarf.
amalia plops onto the corner of the bed, narrowly avoiding a pile of jeans. “so, like… are you going because you actually care about football, like, someone specific?”
“amalia!” you gasp, laughing, while lana groans.
“obviously, we’re going for the game,” lana says, dragging out the last word like it’s painfully obvious.
“sure you are,” amalia says, smirking. she looks at you. “so, which is it? topper or rafe?”
both lana and you freeze mid-motion, slowly turning to look at her. “what?” you say in unison, your voices dripping with confusion and maybe a hint of panic.
“oh my god, it is true.” amalia’s eyes widen, her tone full of mock scandal. “i mean, i heard you talking on the phone,” she says nonchalantly, taking a bite of her granola bar.
lana’s face contorts into a mix of horror and disbelief. “you were eavesdropping?”
“no!” amalia says defensively, though her grin betrays her. “i just walked past your room, and i heard you say something about rafe. or was it topper? honestly, you were talking so fast, i couldn’t tell.”
“besides, we have thin walls. i can hear every conversation you have.”
you bury your face in your hands while lana groans loudly, tossing a sweatshirt at the younger sister. “you’re the absolute worst, you know that?”
she giggles, dodging the sweatshirt. “what? i’m just curious! so, which one is it? rafe or topper?”
“neither,” you say quickly, trying to sound as calm as possible. “we’re just going because… we have nothing better to do.”
amalia doesn’t look convinced, her eyes darting between the two of you like she’s trying to crack a code. “uh-huh. sure.”
you bury your face in your hands. “can we not do this right now?”
“oh, come on,” she says, grinning. “i have to live vicariously through you guys. my life is so boring.”
her older sister snickers. “you’re fifteen, amalia. you’re supposed to have a boring life.”
amalia rolls her eyes. “whatever. you’re lucky mom and dad aren’t here, or they’d totally make me go with you guys.”
lana points to the door, her tone firm. “okay, get out. now. before i tell mom you stole her granola bars again.”
amalia gasps dramatically, clutching the half-eaten bar to her chest. “you wouldn’t.”
with a huff, amalia stands and heads for the door, but not before throwing one last grin over her shoulder. “fine, but if you don’t tell me what happens tonight, i’m stealing your makeup.”
“go away, amalia!” lana yells, and the door slams shut behind her.
“you’re such a snitch,” could be heard from the other side of the door.
as the silence settles, you and lana exchange a look, and then burst into laughter.
“she’s impossible,” you say, shaking your head.
lana smirks, reaching for her eyeliner. “she’s also not wrong about you and rafe, though.”
you grab a pillow and throw it at her. “shut up!”
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the stadium lights flood the field as you and lana make your way to the bleachers. the energy in the air is palpable, the crowd buzzing with excitement as the game is set to begin. the school colors are everywhere—navy and red banners, painted faces, and a sea of matching shirts.
lana’s decked out in navy, her outfit effortlessly stylish, while you’re in red, wearing your school hoodie with pride. she loops her arm through yours as you weave through the crowd.
“this is so chaotic,” lana says, laughing as you dodge a group of cheerleaders running toward the sidelines.
“you’re the one who wanted to come early,” you tease.
“early means we get good seats,” she replies, tugging you along.
as you near the edge of the bleachers, a familiar figure catches your eye. rafe is standing by the fence near the field, already in his uniform, looking every bit the golden boy quarterback he is. his helmet is tucked under one arm, and he’s talking to a teammate, but the moment he spots you, his face lights up.
he steps away, jogging over. “hey!”
“hi,” you reply, a little breathless from the crowd.
“i, uh, saved you and lana some seats,” he says, gesturing toward a spot near the middle of the bleachers, right in prime view of the field.
“oh, thanks!” you say, genuinely surprised and a little touched.
“of course,” he says casually, but there’s a flicker of something in his tone that makes your stomach flip.
meanwhile, lana has already found her focus—topper is lingering a few steps away, looking effortlessly cool in his jersey. she doesn’t waste any time sidling up to him, her voice light and playful as she says, “topper, is this your game face, or do you always look this serious?”
topper smirks, tilting his head at her. “you tell me. think it’s intimidating enough?”
“intimidating? not quite,” she teases, twirling a strand of hair around her finger.
you glance at her, rolling your eyes slightly but smiling. she’s clearly in her element, and for a moment, you’re distracted by their banter.
“hey,” rafe says, drawing your attention back to him.
you look up at him, his expression softer now. “yeah?”
“so, i was thinking…” he starts, trailing off for just a second before giving you a teasing look.
you arch an eyebrow, leaning slightly closer. “really? you were thinking?”
his grin deepens, and he nudges your arm lightly with his elbow. “yeah, shut up. i was thinking…” he pauses again, this time looking a little nervous, though he hides it well. “if i win this game tonight, would you… wanna go out with me?”
you blink, caught completely off guard. his words hang in the air for a moment, and you can’t help the way your lips curve into a smile.
“seriously?” you ask, your voice soft but full of amusement.
“dead serious,” he replies, his eyes locked on yours, a mix of confidence and vulnerability in his expression.
your smile widens, warmth blooming in your chest. “well… i guess i’ll have to cheer extra loud, then.”
his grin stretches across his face, brighter than you’ve ever seen it. “i’ll hold you to that.”
before you can say anything else, lana suddenly appears at your side, her cheeks slightly pink from talking to topper. “come on, we need to grab those seats before someone else does.”
rafe nods, stepping back but keeping his eyes on you. “i’ll see you after the game?”
you nod, your heart still racing. “good luck, captain.”
“thanks,” he says, his voice warm, before jogging back toward his team.
as you and lana make your way to the bleachers, she nudges you with her elbow, her grin mischievous. “sooo… what was that about?”
you shrug, trying to play it cool, but the smile tugging at your lips gives you away.
“uh-huh,” she says, her tone dripping with satisfaction. “you’re so coming to every game from now on.”
you laugh, feeling a little giddy. maybe you just might.
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the game has been intense, and the crowd is on edge. the scoreboard has been a back-and-forth battle, but now, as the clock winds down, rafe's team is trailing by just a few points. the stands are buzzing with nervous energy as the players huddle on the field.
you’re perched on the edge of your seat, your eyes glued to rafe, who is looking more focused than ever. he’s been carrying the weight of the game ever since their second best star player was taken out with an injury. it’s clear that he’s frustrated, his jaw clenched as he scans the field, but there’s something else in his eyes: determination.
topper stands beside him, clearly trying to keep up with the intensity, but it’s hard not to notice that rafe’s doing most of the work. he’s calling the plays, directing the team, and every move he makes looks calculated—almost like he’s pushing his limits, but you can see in the way he carries himself that he’s not going to give up.
the clock is ticking down, seconds slipping away like sand in an hourglass.
“come on, come on!” lana mutters beside you, her voice almost lost in the roar of the crowd. you glance at her, her eyes fixed on rafe and topper, and then at the field. the tension is so thick you could almost cut it with a knife.
rafe takes the ball, his eyes scanning for an opening. he’s got no choice now; it’s all on him. he fakes a pass to topper, sending the defenders rushing toward him, then in one swift motion, he dodges a tackle and charges down the field. the crowd rises to its feet, the energy growing with every step rafe takes.
you can’t help but hold your breath as you watch him break through the last line of defense, topper sprinting beside him, staying just close enough to act as backup. rafe’s legs move like they’re made of steel, his eyes locked on the end zone.
with seconds left on the clock, he passes the ball to topper, who’s just a few yards from the end zone. topper catches it and pivots, leaping into the air just as a defender tries to block him. time seems to slow as the ball arcs through the air and lands perfectly in topper’s hands. the crowd erupts as he crosses the goal line, securing the game-winning touchdown.
you can barely hear yourself think over the deafening roar of the crowd. you jump up with lana, both of you screaming and clapping in excitement. rafe’s face lights up as the team floods onto the field to congratulate topper, but he’s still scanning the crowd for someone.
you catch his eye, and for a split second, everything else fades away. his grin is wide, the exhaustion and tension melting off his face, replaced by sheer triumph.
“looks like you’ll be getting that date after all,” lana says, her voice full of teasing as she nudges you, but you barely hear her. all you can focus on is rafe’s smile, the way he’s looking at you from across the field.
you can feel your heart skip a beat as the final whistle blows. the game is over, and against all odds, rafe’s team pulled through.
lana cheers next to you, but you’re still staring at rafe, a grin tugging at the corner of your lips. he winks at you, the energy of the win still buzzing in his movements.
it’s official: rafe cameron just won the game—and, if you’re being honest, you think he just might’ve won a little bit of your heart too, especially when he was looking right at you after winning the game.
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MASTERLIST
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CURRENT TAGLIST⋆⭒˚。⋆
@maybankslover ⟢ @honeyluvsatj ⟢ @zazidot ⟢ @avada-kedavra-bitch-187 ⟢ @lunaleah ⟢ @maybanksangel ⟢ @wtfdudesblog. ⟢ @niktwazny303. ⟢ @outerbanksloverp4l ⟢ @slut4you ⟢ @maybanksgirl69 ⟢ @hstbsl06 ⟢ @percysley
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794 notes · View notes
secret-moonstruck · 3 days ago
Text
WAKE ME UP | ENHYPEN
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— Pairing: enhypen x fem!reader | (Masterlist)
— Synopsis: You decide to wake them up in a special way.
— Genre: smut
— Warnings: oral sex, praising, making out, begging, cum eating.
— Notes: I'm new to this writing thing, and English is not my first language. Sorry for not writing so well, I wish to improve and bring better and well-written stories.
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Heeseung: It hadn't been long since you had gone to sleep when you woke up feeling Heeseung hard against you, for a moment you were surprised, then you remembered one of his fantasies so you couldn't help but smile.
Carefully not to wake him you turned to face him, then started pumping his member but then a better idea came into your mind when you heard him moan. Turning on top of him, mounting him, rubbing against his erection, you were startled when suddenly his hands grabbed your waist tightly and your body was thrown against the bed. Not long after, you were already a mess of moans and tears as he fiercely pushed himself inside you.
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Jake: You heard that Jake went to practice earlier than the others so you decided to surprise him. But when you entered the room you saw him sleeping, he was so tired that instead of practicing he ended up sleeping while watching the choreography video. You decided to give him a gift to cheer him up. Sitting next to him you ran your hands down his body until you reached his pants, touching him slowly with gentle movements, feeling him get excited you moved closer to kiss his lips, he woke up confused, but soon let out a moan when he felt your hands.
- Please continue Y/N. - He said, laying his head back on the sofa. 
His hand now directly pumping his exposed member, bending over him using his mouth to finish the job, which didn't take long.
He was very happy with his gift, when the members arrived they were surprised that he was so excited and willing to rehearse.
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Jay: It was quiet on the plane, everyone was asleep, but you were bored. As you watched Jay something popped into your mind. With a smile you slid your hand under the blanket that was on his lap, sneaking into his pants and boxers, before long he was already hard under your touches, but your little play didn't last long, soon you felt a tightness around you wrist, when he looked at your eyes, a shiver run through your body.. You rarely saw him with that expression, and when you did, you knew you were in trouble. 
- Again being dirty in public, you know very well what happens when you do that, don't you?
And yes you knew it, he would punish you until he made you cry. Your legs shook in anticipation as he dragged her to the back of the plane. Before being pushed into the bathroom you saw the flight attendant's irritated look, but you didn't have time to feel embarrassed. 
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Sunghoon: You were going to spend the day together, so you went to the dorm early but he was still sleeping.
When you entered his room a smile appeared on your face, he was sleeping so fully that you felt a little guilty for the thought that invaded your mind, but he himself said he found it interesting, why not?
Silently you sat on the bed next to him, your hands sliding under the cover until you reached him, slowly you began to caress him, it didn't take long for him to be extremely hard in your hands, as he moaned in his sleep. You watched as his eyes slowly opened, how his shocked expression was soon replaced by a dirty smile.
- A good way to wake up. - He said pulling her for a kiss.
The way he seemed more wild and aggressive made you realize that you were going to pay dearly for your little joke.
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Sunoo: When you woke up and heard a low moan you ignored it, but when you heard it again but this time your name you froze. 
When you turned around you saw your boyfriend still sleeping, his expression tense, then you heard another groan. Then a smile appeared on your face… was that perverted little boy having a dirty dream about you? As soon as the thought arose you were already under the covers, with him in your mouth, moans coming from him more frequently, even in his dream he moved wanting more, soon you felt him tense up and noticed that he was waking up. You looked at him as he removed the covers in surprise.
- Y/N...what are you...? - He tried to speak but instead another moan left his lips. 
It didn't take long for him to come in you mouth.
- Um… Thank you for breakfast. - You said after swallowing everything. His expression was priceless, but also dangerous.
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Jungwon: The movie was halfway through when you noticed that Jungwon was sleeping, he insisted on watching and fell asleep, you rolled your eyes in annoyance. When you remembered him saying something about being woken up in a special way, you thought it might be a good way to get your “revenge”.
To confirm that he was sleeping you slowly began to touch him over his sweatpants, while massaging his member you smiled as he became hard under your touch, when you heard him moan you pulled his pants along with his boxers showing off his erection.
Your tongue running along his length, when you licked the tip you felt a hand on your head.
- Really a bitch. You didn't even wait for me to wake up.. - Before pushing himself into her mouth
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Niki: You were on a trip to the beach with your friends. Apart from Jay who was driving everyone had slept. Your hands were intertwined with Niki's under a blanket you always took with you on trips. As he slept he ended up pulling his hand further up into his lap, a light went on in his head. Releasing his hand you began to slowly massage him still over his pants, you felt him getting excited and continued touching him, a moan left his lips and you froze when Heeseung who was on the bench in front of you looked back. You pretended to be distracted looking away, he ignored you and turned back.
Not long after, he let out another moan but this time louder, this time everyone turned to you, at the exact moment he woke up and groaned again. Pulling back your hand you wanted to disappear in embarrassment while they complained about you being dirty.
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— Note2: Sorry if it's not good, I'll try to improve it.
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roanniom · 3 days ago
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Couldn't Wait
Eddie Munson x fem!reader
Warnings: 18+ ONLY, NSFW, piv
When you come home from your girls night out, you had expected to find your boyfriend on the couch watching a horror movie or reading a comic book. You hadn't expected to find him waiting to pounce the minute you walked in the door.
"What has gotten into you, Eddie Bear?" you ask with a laugh, kicking off your heels so he can pull you down onto the couch with him.
"I need you, baby. Need you right now." His voice is rough between kisses delivered to your neck and cheeks and collar bone.
"Ok just let me change out of these clothes real quick -,"
“C’mon honey please, ‘m so fucking hard, jus’ look.”
He’s right. His cock is standing at attention in his sweatpants, clearly aching and reaching out for you. He drops a hand to his lap and palms himself slowly.
“Fuck, baby. Please. Need that tight little pussy. Let me have it.”
Your eyes widen taking in the state of him.
"Eddie Munson, what has gotten you so worked up that you could barely wait for me to get back?"
Eddie's gaze shifts away from you sheepishly over to the coffee table. Before he can stop you, you reach for the thing he'd glanced at - a polaroid of you. On your back in your shared bed. Naked and blissed out with a tattooed arm reaching in from the bottom of frame to rest a hand in the space between your legs.
"Oh," you say simply, a small smile forming on your lips.
"Baby, I'm fucking aching for you."
You play with one of his curls and pretend to consider it.
"Why didn't you just take care of yourself while I was gone?" you ask. "I wouldn't have minded."
"You think I would deprive myself of a goddess in favor of my own shitty hand? Babe. Be serious."
Eddie's eyelids are heavy and his chest rises and falls a little more rapidly the more he gets worked up. You drop your palm to it and let it slide down the plane of his torso, down his abdomen, and into his lap.
"Alright. We can be serious." You wrap your hand around his length through his pants in earnest. Eddie intakes breath sharply.
"Yes. Yes yes yes."
Your clothes on the floor in a matter of seconds, Eddie replacing the cups of your bra with his hands.
"Ahhh finally," Eddie says with the gusto of a man having his first drink of water after a long thirst. All you're doing is grinding down on him, working yourself up to reach his level. But the look on Eddie's face implies he's reached nirvana.
"You wanted me that bad, huh?" you tease, a bit more breathlessly.
"More than a blind man wants to see the sun," Eddie says reverently into your cleavage.
"Well that's an exaggeration," you chuckle. You can't press it, however, because Eddie begins pressing his finger on your clit through your underwear. After a few minutes you find yourself writhing above him.
After a particularly loud moan from you, Eddie grins.
"Speaking of exaggeration..."
"Oh shut up and fuck me, Munson," you smack his shoulder and climb off him to divest yourself of your final scrap of clothing.
"With pleasure. princess." Eddie gives you a salute before chucking off the rest of his clothes as well.
Before you can ask him how he wants you, however, you're twirled around to face away from him, his hand on the back of your neck, guiding you to kneel on the couch.
"That's it, baby," Eddie practically purrs. He lines his tip up with your dripping center, but instead of immediately sheathing himself inside of you, he swipes from your core down to your clit.
"Fucking tease," you complain, wiggling your hips to entice him forward. After all of his pleading and cajoling he was still making you wait. A swift slap to your ass makes you squeal.
"Takes one to know one."
When he finally does slide inside of you, you realize he's right. You'd rather this - a quick fuck in the dark of night with your lover - than seeing the sun.
~*~
I hope you enjoyed!
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gallusrostromegalus · 2 days ago
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AEIWAM How does the chain of command work? What are the seated officers *supposed* to be doing? What's the lowest rank? What is the least yell-able rank? Which job looks silly on paper but is actually really load bearing? Anything you want an excuse to rant about on this topic?
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Yeah ok I'll ramble:
So there's how the Divisions are SUPPOSED to work:
Every division of the Gotei-13 consists of exactly 200 members, 20 of which are seated officers. The top two positions are the "Captain" and "Lieutenant".
The Captain (#1) is in charge of EVERYTHING but directly in charge of seated officers 2-10
The Lieutenant (#2) is in charge of seated officers 11-20
Officers 20-11 are usually in charge of the division's regular/maintenance functions, officers 9-3 are in charge of whatever special projects are going on
Seated officers 3-20 each then have 9 of the remaining 180 rank-and-file shinigami assigned to them to carry out whatever orders
Captains can have Duplicate Officers of the same rank (Shunsui's Co-lieutenants or Ukitake's teo 3rd seats), but they are not allowed to have more than 20 seated officers total (there is no 8th or 13th 20th seat)
...And then there's how the divisions *actually* work.
First of all, almost nobody actually sticks to the "Exactly 200 People Per Division" rule. The rule was put in by the Central 46 to prevent the Gotei-13 from growing too large and becoming a military force that could unbalance the government.
The ones who do stick to it currently are:
Yamamoto (Sticking to the rules out of fear of the C46)
Komamura (But doing other chicanery mentioned below)
Zaraki (AT THE ABSOLUTE LIMIT OF HIS ATTENTION SPAN)
Some Captains are a bit up shit creek in that their division is in charge of WAY MORE SHIT THAN 200 PEOPLE CAN ACTUALLY DO.
Unohana got really creative about what counted as a "Consultant" or "Assistant" or "Temporary Hire" until she finally had enough damn people to actually run the seireitei's primary shinigami and civilian hospital, several major civil services (until the Ninth took over the Archives under Tousen and the Eleventh took over Sanitation under Zaraki).
Soi Fon has done something similar by stretching the definition of things she's "In Charge Of". Parts of the Onmitsukido, Shihouin clan retainers, Mercenaries etc.
Mayuri decided to stretch the definition of what counted as "People".
More commonly, captains will have a handful of people they pay under the table to help with tasks someone needs to do but doesn't need a Shinigami- errand-runners, tech support etc.
Rose and Byakuya have like, six extra people a piece, mostly for small tasks that otherwise gum up the works or that are major QoL improvements for the squad. Tea ladies, messengers, someone who bakes snacks and tidies the common areas. Housekeeping.
Tousen employs like 15-20 extra people in the 9th because they were already on the verge of becoming a substitute social service when he took over. He would have hired more but Aizen didn't want questions. Ukitake and Shunsui employ a similar number of off-the-books division members- Ukitake sort of absorbed the Kido corps after Tessai vanished and Shunsui has a Whole Lotta Finance Consultants.
MATSUMOTO has like. 50 extra people on the books. QOL improvements, minor task monkeys, couple of recently deceased consultants with the latest in new tech and organizational science… Okay, and a bunch of people she hired basically to help them out. Old lady Yamazaki, the two local street bums (you notice how nothing EVER gets stolen or vandalized at the tenth?), a bunch of academy kids from the shitstain districts of the rukongai who can't afford board I mean really I found Daisuke sleeping in with the training dummies did you want me to LEAVE him there?
...And then some people are running divisions of LESS than 200 people.
Shinji keeps forgetting to hire more people to replace people who retired.
Gin never actually figured out HOW to hire new people.
On the Far Opposite end of this nonsense is Komamura, who has gotten the 7th into such a well-oiled and efficient machine that he doesn't actually NEED all 200 members, so he keeps his additional staff on the actual payroll via clever use of Expense Reports.
Furthermore, what any given seated officer is actually in charge of varies wildly not only by Division but also by individual captains.
Unohana puts all her seated officers in charge of specific branches of medicine (anesthesiology, endrocinology, toxicology, etc.) and as far as she's concerned 3-20 are all the same rank.
Shunsui put himself and his lieutenants in charge of the 8th's regular functions (Finance) so he could deploy his 19 other officers to investigate all the fucking white-collar crime he got saddled with managing.
It's not clear if Zaraki ever actually assigned ranks to officers 4-20. He's captain, Ikkaku is is right hand, Yumichika is effectively-his co-lieutenant-but-wanted-the number-3 spot and there is a pack of 17 other guys that have men assigned to them but *what number seated officer they actually are* is a division secret. Partly because, like his favorite captain, every officer that is not his lieutenant is the same rank as far as Zaraki is concerned, and partly because if some district daimyo or minor noble demands to see the highest-ranked available officer available for their trifling matter, whoever he sends is now his "Fourth Seat". He's had as many as a dozen "Fourth Seat" Officers deployed at once!
The Tenth Division under captain Shiba always had the same teams- once you were assigned to a seated officer, the only way to change your coworkers was to get promoted. Under Captain Matsumoto, your co-workers change every week. Some seated officers have as many as 30 people assigned to them, some as little as two, and what officer you're working under changes as needed.
Lieutenant is probably the worst job in the Gotei-13.
It's the same as being a seated officer except you're responsible for the other officers instead of rank-and-file, you have to go to way more meetings and if something happens to your captain, you're acting captain until further notice
Does come with a SWEET pay raise tho
As the captains have to answer to Yamamoto, the Lieutenants have to answer to Sasakibe, the Gotei-13's Shadow King.
Sasakibe is a very quiet, almost forgettable man which is hilarious because he holds the positions of Lieutenant-captain of the Gotei-13, Headmaster of Genryusai Academy, and Gotei-13 Liaison to the Central 46. The man is the single most powerful person in soul society after Yamamoto and Yamamoto's Ex-Wife.
The lieutenants see him more often than any captain sees Yamamoto, often when they would least like to. He has a habit of Suddenly Appearing when they're in the middle of something embarassing.
Chojiro Sasakibe refuses to admit that there is even the remotest possibility that Yamamoto will predecease him, so in lieu of having to take over as "Acting Captain-General", Sasakibe regards his primary duty as Lieutenant-Captain to prepare all the lieutenants under him to become future captains. ALL of them, because he can't actually talk Yamamoto out of a poor pick once the man gets an idea into his head. The twelfth division has been a SHAMBLES because he hasn't been able to change Yamamoto's mind about the importance of R&D vs Reliable Provisioning. Maybe Mayuri will poison himself and Lieutenant Kurotsuichi can take over. She's *DELIGHTFULLY* reliable.
If he can't get the captains to train their (possible) replacements, BY THE SOUL KING'S NUTS HE WILL. He's had to do a lot of work with Poor Master Kira, but he thinks the boy still has potential. Miss Hinamori will need a lot of rehabiliation too, and Miss Suragaki needs to be outright domesticated so Captain Hirako is NOT ALLOWED TO DIE any time soon.
Some of them he's quite pleased with, actually. Master Macheriyo has come out quite nicely, but the Omaedas have always been strong stock in Sasakibe's mind. He was very upset when Seinosuke Yamada left to become the chief of medicine at the Seireitei's private hospital but Miss Koetetsu has exceeded his wildest expectations. Miss Kuchiki has not only filled Lieutenant Shiba's shoes, but gone up a size. He is not looking forward to the impending "Three Captains Kuchiki" situation though.
The Eleventh has always been an unmanageable dumpster fire but Lieutenant Madarame and Lieutenant-But-Third-Seat Aseyagawa put him somewhat at ease. With Sasakibe's rotten luck, Zaraki is probably immortal but he has two of the most organized men in soul society to think for him so it'll probably be alright.
The thing he's REALLY looking for is someone to train as HIS OWN replacement- he assumes he will die first, and SOMEONE will need to take care of Yamamoto-Sama in his place. He thought he'd found that in Komamura, possibly his favorite shinigami he's ever trained, but it was not to be. He currently has high hopes for Liuetenant Ise should something happen to him.
It will not. It's going to be MUCH more annoying than that.
The hallmark of a great lieutenant is that they can take over for their captain at the drop of a hat, and most captains regularly put their lieutenants in charge as "Acting Captain" for brief periods to practice.
Unohana puts hers in charge the most often, because she regularly has to go do surgery where she can't be interrupted. Isane Koetetsu is Acting Captain at least twice a week, and once had to take to role on for a solid month!
Ukitake has semi-regularly scheduled "Dead Days" where he's in the office but nobody is allowed to acknowledge him, so he can see how they run and give concrit to his lieutenant. It helps his division cope with his illness, but one time a picture of him asleep with his feet on his desk and a piece of paper taped to his face reading "I'M DEAD, GO ASK RUKIA" escaped the context of the 13th and there was Bedlam about it.
Zaraki has either never or always had Ikkaku in the position of "Acting Captain" and neither of them will clarify that situation.
Tousen didn't *intentionally* put Shuuhei in charge- he tried to avoid it to keep his beloved lieutenant out of Aizen's Circle Of Influence, but Shuuhei is like a border collie in that if he is not Being Helpful RIGHT NOW HE WILL EXPLODE AND DIE, and so, like a border collie, Shuuhei kept inventing jobs for himself and taking over any random task that was not immediately explicitly someone's job so when Tousen got abducted Shuuhei was doing like 60% of the work already.
Gin NEVER put Izuru in the role of "Acting Captain", he just foisted all his responsibilities onto the boy with none of the authority which has made him a nervous wreck. Captain Otoribashi, on the other hand, casually decided "I need the day off to go see a preformance of Bizet in the 3rd district, Izuru you're captain until i get back, BYE~!" and was only stopped from breezing out the door by Izuru's immediate scream of panic. They're working on it.
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moonstruckme · 18 hours ago
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Please Mr. Postman
summary: it's your first day at a new job, and the postman who comes by your office is especially friendly
cw: just fluff honestly, passed on opportunities to talk about post worker uniform shorts (sorry, won't happen again)
postman!James x fem!reader ♡ 732 words
A friendly tap on the glass startles you out of your stolen moment of meditation. You tear your face away from its hiding place in your hands to find a mail carrier peering at the large, darkened window of your office, shading his eyes to see in. You hasten and hit the button to unlock the door before he can. 
Your office setup sort of makes you feel like a fish in a tank, or a zoo animal in a glassed-in enclosure. You’ve been itchy with the discomfort of being seen all day. You take a moment to straighten the row of pens on your empty desk as the postman’s voice booms in the entryway around the corner. 
“Margaret, I never thought I’d see the day! Slipping on the job, tsk, tsk—” He fits his dolly through the doorway of your office with a practiced maneuver, stopping short when he sees you. “Oh. You’re not Margaret.” 
You shoot him a small, sheepish, please-don’t-be-mad-at-me smile (you’ve had lots of practice with it already this morning). “I’m new.” 
“You are!” he says, like this is the discovery of his day. “What’s your name, lovely? I’m James.” 
You tell him yours, itching for a pen to write his name down with. You’ve had to learn so many, but James strikes you already as someone who remembers names and you’d hate to forget his. He has a bright smile that pokes dimples into sun-kissed cheeks and the sort of warm voice which threatens more smiles to come. He’s handsome, muscular limbs making his uniform fit tightly around his biceps and quads and brown eyes made large behind thick glasses. 
“Margaret’s moved into accounting,” you tell him. “I’m replacing her, today’s my first day.” 
James nods sagely. “Well, you look well prepared for it. Got all your pens in order” —your cheeks warm at his notice— “and you look very smart.” The warmth worsens. Your toes ache inside your stiff new shoes. “I’m sure you’re making a great impression.” 
“Thanks,” you say, voice softening self-consciously. “I hope so.” 
“Oh, don’t worry.” He waves you off, leaning his hip against your desk. “Everyone here seems very nice. I mean, I’ve mostly spoken to Margaret, but still. How are you finding it?” 
“Um.” You glance towards the door that leads to the rest of the office as though your boss is standing with her ear pressed to it. “It’s nice, so far, yeah. The coffee in the break room is good, so.” 
James’ laugh is loud and lively, echoing in the small space. It makes you smile; you don’t think you’ve said anything so funny as to earn such a sound. 
“Well, that’s the best you can hope for, isn’t it?” he asks. “Good coffee to keep trudging through. And it is only your first day, you can’t likely make an estimate of the whole place just yet.” 
“Exactly,” you say, relieved. 
“Is this the sort of thing you want to do? Work here, I mean?” 
“Oh.” The question catches you off guard. It’s more than the weak small talk you’ve made with the other delivery people who’ve come by today, but there’s an earnestness in James’ face that says he really wants to know. “Yeah, it is. I mean, maybe not here” —you gesture to your unadorned fishbowl of an office— “but in this field, yeah. I’d like to stay here if I can.” 
He grins. “I’m sure they’ll be thrilled to have you, lovely. Well,” he heads for the stack of boxes against the wall, “I don’t want to keep you. This might take me two trips, but don’t mind me coming in and out, alright?” 
“Oh.” You watch him load six boxes expertly onto the dolly, biceps flexing slightly as he tilts it back onto the wheels. “Do you want any help?” 
The grin James flashes you sends a funny tingle down your spine. “You’re sweet. Thanks, I’ve got it. Just unlock the door for me on my way back in, yeah?” You do keep an eye on the door this time. You offer again to help when he comes back, but James only makes a comment about your work clothes being too nice to get dirt on and waves you away with an easy smile. You find yourself watching his truck rumble out of the parking lot with a light, fluttery feeling in your stomach.
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bogleech · 17 hours ago
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top edits I'd retroactively make to whatever that version of the bible is that my country has such a big boner for (sorry I don't know what the different versions are actually called)
Drop the damnation/salvation system in favor of the kind where seriously only really really cruel selfish people go to hell but they can get out if they're actually nice deep down and are SUPER sorry for real
Take out any kind of sin that's stupid and doesn't make sense, replace with more sensible things like "don't drain wetlands" and "don't have slaves" and "if you find black goop in the ground just leave it there, trust us"
Throw in some handy instructions on what electricity is and how to build a solar panel. I wanna see what this does to the state of technology when I get back.
Explain what germs are and to wash your hands with soap please
Make the apostles more fun, like one of them should definitely be a skeleton guy and one should have plant powers.
Add a B-plot that canonizes the complete events of Adam Sandler's "Little Nicky"
Have God apologize for the existence of suffering but unfortunately all his power got used up to get Darwinian Evolution up and running
Sprinkle details about God's physical appearance all throughout until it's impossible to ignore that this is a description of a little dapper toad
I already ditched the garden of eden obviously because it's stupid but to make doubly sure western society likes snakes let's make jesus a big snake all along, and a venomous one. Biting becomes Jesus's main way of dealing with problems.
Ruin the modern protestant perception of absolute good and evil by having Jesus befriend a cool bad boy demon, which God is only a little concerned by like "(grumpy toad noises) I'm not so sure about this friend of yours young lady"
he will however slowly come around to meeting the demon's parents at a very funny dinner where everything goes TERRIBLY wrong but in the end they can all share a laugh about it
The apocalypse is a cool concept so I'd keep that but change it around so it's heaven, hell and earth uniting against a common foe: the god of the alternate, darker timeline I just erased. Nobody would know what that means but I think that would be compelling in itself. I'd like to see those philosophical debates.
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sashaforthewin · 13 hours ago
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Mine are from EarPeace and the thing I like most about them is they are in a little metal holder that clips onto my keys, so I literally always have them with me. Sometimes I forget I'm going to a show, but hey, they're right there on my keys! Sometimes I go to a spur of the moment show and hey, got those earplugs with me! Sometimes the train is an older one that has a horrible loud screeching, I just pop in these bad boys and enjoy a non-painful ride! I even use them while I'm blowdrying my hair because that thing is surprisingly loud.
Earplugs, GET SOME!
The foam ones work but I recommend getting a nicer pair. EarPeace, Eargasm, High Fidelity, Hearos, and a bunch of other brands all have a filter to let in sound but block anything over a certain decibel, and they often come with interchangeable filters so you can switch from concert to noise canceling. They last a long time, I've had mine for years and haven't needed to replace anything.
Loop don't have filters, it like echoes the sound around the little hollow ring to quiet it. I haven't personally tried them but I've seen a lot of reviews for the noise canceling version, no clue if it distorts the sound though I would assume they're fine since I see people wearing them at shows sometimes.
Unless you're going with the fancy custom fit ones, you're looking at around $40 or so a pair, just double check the reviews and the stats. And once you decide on a pair, sign up for their email list before buying, all those brands I listed regularly have sales so you don't typically even have to pay full price.
I chose mine because the stats were best for the price range and it came with a third plug as a backup in case I lose one mid-show. But even if you're not ready to shell out for a fancy pair, at the very least use the foam ones, most bars at venues sell them for a dollar or two if you forget. Just don't rawdog a concert, I promise you you can actually hear the songs better when you cut out the noise and the post concert experience is much more fun without tinnitus
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kurohe · 2 days ago
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Things you can do to actively participate in the revolution
Here's the list !
I know some of those will look really silly, i promise they are not. And obviously, this is not a checklist, you don't have to do everything. But they're steps that you can absolutely take if you wish to, and they WILL help.
(under the cut !)
1) Let's start off with a very easy one you can do right now: stop using Chrome. It's a google owned browser, and it sents all of your data towards it. Mozilla is a very good replacement, but almost anything will do, really. This may sound a little dumb, but you are revolting against capitalism as a whole, and this is a good first step !
2) Start stealing things from supermarkets and malls. I am not kidding. Little things, that aren't really monitored: a can of food, a lighter, a pair of socks. Condiments are particularly easy to hide in bags or pockets. Steal hygiene products, steal food.
Remember that you should have access to those for free, and you don't because a few rich guys don't want you to.
Additional tip: train station stores are very easy to steal from, because they're so busy. But don't put yourself in danger. Check beforehand if they check bags at checkout, look out for employees that might notice what you're doing. Don't be reckless.
3) In the same line, if you see someone stealing anything from a big store, no you didn't.
(this used to also say airports, but i've been told it's way too high risk as it's considered a federal crime. Thanks for letting me know)
4) I know a lot of people are scared of disrespecting rules. By fear of being caught, or by guilt. My advice is: start disrespecting stupid, meaningless rules. I don't have specific exemples, but you'll encounter them and wonder why you're doing that. Stop doing it. This will train you to be able to disobey autority way easier.
5) Put stickers everywhere. If you already have them, go ham. Especially on public property (lamposts are amazing). If you don't, buy them from artists or independant stores, not big brands. If you cannot afford them, remember that you can simply write stuff on an A4 paper and plaster it to walls. Or even post its !
6) Carry a sharpie with you at all time, the big black ones. If you see propaganda, scribble it out. Keep a look out for terfs stickers, maga posters, etc. Also good for getting rid of transphobic and sexist stuff written on public restroom stalls !
7) Buy locally. This means going to the market or small stores, and thrifting your clothes. If you can't for money or accessibility reasons, try trading with your friends, family and neighbours. Get communication going in your circles, and you'll realise there are a lot of things that you can simply trade with or buy from people around you. Like a jar of jam against some eggs, or a pair of socks for a t-shirt you don't wear anymore !
8) Learn how to sew. I know, that sounds dumb ! But i promise you, not only will it be amazing to trade with other people ("i'll sew back ur shirt and in exchange, you give me a can of peaches !"), corporations also haaaate when you know how to fix your clothes. Because they want you to buy more. You'll spend a lot less money if you know how to fix em
9) If you have the space and the money, grow your own food, and share it or sell it around you. Be careful, some assholes will call the FDA on you. Do that with people you trust.
Additional tip: growing vegetables and fruits can be a real nightmare. You can absolutely start by just growing some basil or mint :)
10) Organise. Join leftist groups online, even if it's just to see what's being said, you don't even need to interact. Follow creators, repost and share their content. By doing that, you'll stay informed on group movements like strikes, protests and boycotts, which you can then participate in. It's very important you're connected to other ppl and the movements that are started !
11) Unionize. I'm very sorry I don't know the exact way unions work in the US, but if you can, join one. They will help you in times of needs, especially if you're a student or a worker. If you're not sure how to do that, absolutely ask around to people you know are very active politically, around you or online. People will help.
12) Stay. Informed. Follow independant papers and news outlet. If you can afford it, give them a dollar or two. They are fighting everyday for access to unbiased information for all, and sadly, their independance means that they rely almost entirely on donations and people simply engaging with what they put out.
If you can't access those: do not get your news from TV. Ever. Or anywhere else that has been bought by the far right. Sadly, the majority of TV channels are just the worst.
And, most importantly: fact check. All of the time.
13) Share that information. Talk to those you trust and who are ready to listen to you, and tell them about what's happening. Get angry with them. Revolution stems from people coming together and realising that they're being used and profited off of. Share videos and posts relating to politics, especially informative videos.
14) Go to protests ! If you've never been, i know it can be scary. But you can stay in the middle (don't go all the way to the front, that's where stuff can get heated) and scream and walk with everyone else. You'll meet people who, like you, want things to change. Capitalism wants you to stay as unconnected to others as possible, and that's a great way to fight that.
Sometimes, there are sites that have a planning for all protests happening in a city. Look up if one exists for yours
15) Create and strenghten community. I know i really struggled with this one, because it's so vague. But here's a few places you can start:
-Go and introduce yourself to your neighbours, if you deem it safe. Give them a little gift if you can afford it, like a pack of pasta.
-Make new friends, even if they aren't deep friendships. You need connections. Online or irl, both are fine- don't stay isolated.
-If you already have community, go check on them right now. Ask your friends how they're doing, and if they need anything- ask how they're being impacted by what's happening right now politically.
16) Look for ways to fuck over the institutions in easy ways. One example that went around tumblr a lot is letting dandelions grow in your backyard, because landlords fucking hate it. If you work in retail or fast food, cheat. Accidentally forget to scan the diapers. Put in 7 nuggets instead of 6.
17) Engage in art. MAKE art. Music, shitty paint drawings, craft, anything as long as you're being creative. Share it. If you feel like you can't do that, then support artists. Make a point to look up cool illustrations, and new music. Go to the cinema.
If you're an artist currently in an underpaid office job, please, by the love of god, be creative during office hours. You're underpaid, they do not deserve your full time and attention. Take 30 minutes to write that snippet you've been thinking about.
(and actually, if you're underpaid at all: do the minimum required. So that you can't be fired, but that's it. Any more effort is not worth it. Companies will never be thankful for what you do.)
18) Look up books that your state banned, and go read them. You can get them secondhand, or as pdfs online. (if anyone needs ressources, i will glady look for and share them.)
And, actually, read books in general if you can. Yes, fanfics count !
19) Seek education. There's a lot of youtube channels out there talking about educational subjects in a fun way. Some things the rich assholes who run the country specifically don't want you to learn more about are: biology, history and archeology, social and economic sciences. GO LEARN ABOUT THOSE.
The people in power don't want you to be educated. It's why they eviscerated the education system.
20) PIRATE. I cannot stress this enough, anything you can pirate (that isn't from small, indie creators, except if you absolutely can't afford it) do it. Download music illegally, torrent movies and games. If you want access to academical studies and papers, some writers will give them to you for free if you email them about it. There are also ways to go around paywalls.
21) Don't fall for the traps of "progressive brands". Lately, i've seen a lot of praise for Ben and Jerry's for openly supporting lgbtq rights and being globally anti-trump. They are still a brand. Avoid buying from any big names when you can. That being said, if you have to, check beforehand which ones and what their history is. Some are more evil than others.
Additional tip: a lot of brands you see in stores are actually owned by bigger brands. One prime example of this is Nestle, who are fucking evil, but they own a shitload of other big names. Be careful what you buy.
22) I hate to say this, but be prepared to defend yourself. Revolutions are never peaceful. You will get in danger. If you can, get in ok physical shape. If you can't, buy a gun. (Remember Alabama has a 99% acceptation rate, you can get one in 10 minutes.) I hate firearms, but the enemy will have them too. Arm yourself.
If none of those are available options to you, please, make sure you have someone around you that will be able to protect you, or a place where you can be safe. Whether you are disabled, a minor, or anything else. Don't put yourself in more danger than is necessary.
23) Last but not least, be kind. When someone cuts off a woman speaking, interrupt and give her the floor back. Shame those who think it's right to say bigoted shit in public. Listen to those around you. If you can't act, then remember to always have empathy for the homeless, for drug users, for immigrants. Understand they are people just like you. You are not immune to propaganda and prejudice, no matter who you are. Always question yourself and your biases.
(if you've read this far, please repost. We need this to reach as many people as possible)
I want to remind you that you're not alone. I know things seem hopeless, but the simple fact that you're reading this is proof it's not. I don't live in the US, but i'm supporting you as best i can from where i am, and sending you strenght.
If you have any questions, do ask away. I'll end on this image that's very dear to me:
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