#you especially after you acted like me drawing two guys on the same page was gonna be good to show my homophobic grandpa
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my parents really act like if they ain’t see me doin it, i ain’t gonna do it again
#cade’s things#cade’s thoughts 💭#cade vents#my momma is a trip#she be like “why don’t you draw anymore?”#i do just not in front of you or anybody else#you especially after you acted like me drawing two guys on the same page was gonna be good to show my homophobic grandpa#like ?????#he’s not openly homophobic or anythin#he’ll see smth queer n be like “it’s that gay stuff again..”#but yea#oh and this goes w readin too#bcuz my mom’ll be like “when was the last time you read?”#really don’t understand i must be in a good mindset n have music playin to draw n read like ??#n you say u know me#🙄
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Hello Dot! Congratulations on 1.5k followers. I am very excited for your matchup event! May I have a request for matchup type 1 with Ensemble Stars? I'm sorry if this is a little bit long...
My name is Dawn. I'm an INFP-T girl who likes cute and pretty things. I enjoy drawing and designing costumes. I like listening to music and singing. I'm rather wild if left to my own devices (because I like rock and niche edm), but if someone tells me to sing for them I'd be really shy (lol). I also like sweets, and sometimes I go on walks after school to find cute stores and cafes to visit. I like cute animals too, like cats and dogs and bunnies. I like all colors, but my favourite is pastel colors or bright colors like hot pink and cyan. I figured I crave cuddles and kisses too, even though I never really got a lover to test if I really enjoy these activities.
I dislike loud noises, and I'd get overstimulated and nervous if left for a long time in a noisy environment. I also dislike mean people, or those who act in a threatening behavior in general. I don't hate cold weather, but I get cold really easily and it's quite annoying. I have insomnia and find it hard to sleep and as a resuot I'm quite sleep deprived 😔.
Ummm small story about me, had a rough childhood because my classmates and parents were pretty mean to me, and for a long time I was afraid of being judged and hurt, so I bottled up my feelings and closed myself off. But I realized it would be lonely and sad if I just drown in negative feelings, and that instead I should heal and use my understanding and experience with being hurt to comfort others, and be kind and strong no matter what.
I seek a partner who is gentle, affectionate and loyal. And maybe someone who'd let me draw silly doodles on their hands or notebook (I'm sorry, it's one of the things I must to in my lifetime).
Thank you very much and congratulations again! Have a wonderful day!
(hey Dawn Idk if you're bi/pan, or not, but I genuinely thought this was the perfect match for you. If you want a different one though, let me know! I won't be offended!)
I match you with Arashi Narukami.
Just two cute girls living their cute girl life? Yes! Going to cute cat cafes, buying cute outfits for each other, living their cutesy life? Excellent!
Arashi enjoys making costumes! I can totally see you drawing and designing stuff together, then making them together. She's proud to show off her skills, while at the same time is more than excited that you are so creative!!!! Design matching cute looks for the both of you. She might die. (Or squeeze you to death in the tightest hug you've ever felt)
She's a cuddler. I've decided. She likes to hold you close, and feel your heartbeat against hers. In cold weather she'll do this to keep you warm, but she also just does this when she's noticing your having trouble sleeping. She'll sing new Knights lyrics she's been working on under her breath, and will rub your back, until you, hopefully, drift off.
Arashi's job means the both of you have to go to loud places sometimes. But she's really good at feeling the needs of those around her. So she'll make sure to keep an eye on you. If it looks like it's getting to be too much, she'll make her graceful exit, causing all the fangirls to swoon over your loving knight.
Your dream is to doodle on her notes and her hand? Sweetheart, she's so in! When she has music rehearsals, sometimes they can be long and grueling, especially if the harmonies aren't going exactly as they should. But it makes it easier when she flips the page, and there's a little gift from you. If you guys are in a loud place, and she can't get you out of there, that's when she'll offer a pen and her hand as distraction for the time being. Again, the fangirls are SIMPING.
Your face was pressed to her chest, so that you could hear her heartbeat. She ran her fingers through your hair and absentmindedly hummed a song. Sometimes this would work. Sometimes, her scent, heartbeat, and voice would help you drift off. Today was not "sometimes".
"Rashi?" You looked up and she opened her eyes, as though she was starting to drift off instead.
"Hm?"
"I don't think this is gonna work tonight," you whispered.
She nodded and shifted, like she was going to separate from you. So, naturally, you buried yourself deeper against her.
"Alright," she laughed, "What does my Dawn want to do instead?"
"You're warm," you muttered, making her laugh again.
"I thought this wasn't working?"
"That doesn't mean I want to stop cuddling. It just means I'm not sleeping!"
"Fair point. Do you just want to chat then? Or…"
She pulled out the pen she always keeps on hand, and gave it to you before brandishing the back of her hand.
"My perfect knight," you laughed, beginning to doodle.
"Don't forget it," she teased
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The Wrong Lifetime – Six // Wanda Maximoff
chapter five | story masterlist | main masterlist | wattpad | chapter seven
author’s note: i’m glad you all seemed to like the last chapter! i’m all for slow burn but i didn’t want to leave you hanging too long aha. Now onto dating territory!
Since going to Blackpool with Wanda, we hadn't actually gotten another moment to ourselves. Wedding plans were picking up which kept her busy, and if not that, then I'd only see her in passing in which we'd exchange smiles before moving on.
So, I though it would be good to take her out on a date. A proper one, even if it was to be disguised as a simple outing between soon-to-be sister-in-laws. The plan was to 'bump' into her in town, which we did, then I asked her if she wanted to go to the art gallery. She'd been before, but they'd put in a new exhibition which I thought she might like.
We couldn't exactly hold hands when there, but I made the most of her presence and stood a little too close to her than a friend might. Since she'd kissed me at the beach, I wasn't able to think about anything else. And when shot me a knowing smile, I knew she felt the same.
"I like this one," I told her, pointing to a piece hung on the wall, before squinting to read the plaque. "Jedburgh Abbey from the River by Thomas Girtin."
"And why's that?" she asked, watching me with humoured eyes.
I pursed my lips, glancing between her and the painting sheepishly. "I'm not gonna lie, I just like the way the guy painted the clouds in the sky."
She stifled laughter, not wanting to draw attention from passers-by, and nudged me in the shoulder. "You're unbelievable, milaya (darling). We didn't have to come here if you don't like art."
I gave her a knowing look. "Hey, I love art. Especially when it's by a certain Sokovian artist named Wanda Maximoff."
Rolling her eyes, she shook her head. I grinned at her bashfulness, wanting to tease her but also very true with my words. Her work was my favourite, biased or not, and I still had that amazing portrait she'd done of me in my room back home. It was tucked into one of my drawers where nobody would find it. I didn't want anyone else to look at it since she'd done it for me and it was private... it was a beautiful reminder of the amazing day we'd had.
"You're poking fun, but in all seriousness, I'd actually love for my work to be up here someday," she said softly, looking at the painting before us with hopeful eyes.
"They wish they were that lucky to score someone as talented as you," I said without skipping a beat.
She cracked a smile, tilting her head in my direction. It was obvious she was losing her patience with me, but I enjoyed watching her lose it. She didn't know what to say, especially when being complimented, and it was endearing to witness.
We remained civil for the remainder of the 'date', refraining from holding hands or gazing at each other longer than friends would, and I was pretty proud of myself for not thinking about kissing her once when we were done.
As we got into the carriage to go back home, the door closed and I was going to ask her how she found it when she moved towards me in an instant, kissing me without question. I raised my hand, caressing her jaw and closing my eyes as she leaned forward, practically on my lap, not that I cared. She sucked on my bottom lip sensually before she opened her mouth, pushing her tongue into mine. I almost forgot how to breathe as she did, unprepared for such an intense kiss.
"I've been wanting to do that all day," she revealed when she pulled away.
I flushed at the contact, a dazed smile on my lips. "Huh."
She chuckled as she sat back beside me more 'appropriately'. "Thanks for taking me. I loved it."
I nodded lamely, still trying to recover from our kiss. "I'm– I'm glad."
She smirked playfully, leaning forward to press a gentle kiss to my lips before sitting back. "You're so cute."
My words still hadn't returned, so all I could do was nod before looking the other way. Her laughter filled the carriage and I wondered how I'd gotten so lucky to be in the presence of someone so perfect.
After exchanging some more kisses and actually being able to hold hands without prying eyes, we reached Wanda's home and she invited me in for some tea. Sadly, that meant we had to let go of one another, but I think she'd given me enough to remember her by as we parted, and she must have thought the same, judging from the smirk she sent my way.
We sat on the patio outside to have some tea and biscuits, enjoying the sunshine and blue skies, a rare occurrence for England. We were chatting mindlessly when her brother decided to make an appearance, helping himself to a seat between Wanda and I.
"How lovely of you to grace us with your presence, Miss Y/L/N," he said playfully, shooting me a charming smile, before reaching to grab a biscuit. Wanda slapped his hand but he stole one anyway, making her roll her eyes.
"Nice to see you, Pietro," I greeted with amusement, always enjoying his presence.
"And you," he returned, before chowing down his biscuit.
Wanda gave me a fed up look over his shoulder which he was oblivious to, and I tried not to laugh as she clearly wasn't a fan of him interrupting our time.
"So, I caught a glimpse of the wedding invitations," Pietro said, making conversation. He glanced between us with a nod of approval. "They're coming along well."
I hummed in agreement, smile becoming less real when he mentioned the wedding. Wanda didn't acknowledge his words as she fiddled with the handle of her teacup.
"Is your brother behaving, Y/N?" Pietro continued jokingly, looking to me. "I know how many admirers he has, but my sister should be his first priority."
"Oh, Piet...," Wanda breathed out with embarrassment, facepalming.
"Of course he is," I assured her brother with a small smile. "He wouldn't dare try hurting Wanda or he'd have a lot of explaining to do."
There was some playfulness in my voice, but an underlying truth to my words.
"It's sweet how close you've gotten," Pietro noticed, looking between us, before settling his gaze on me. "It's about time Wanda made friends with people who aren't me."
Cue another slap. I chuckled at her sheepish expression, amused by Pietro's antics.
"Anyway," he changed the subject for his sister's sake, "mother has been getting on my very nerve about finding a bride because you decided to get married."
Wanda rolled her eyes. "We both know I didn't decide, Piet."
He sighed over-dramatically. "Well, it's because of your engagement that she's now on my back about it."
"Join the club," I joked, knowing exactly what he meant. "My mum was already on my back about finding a husband, but since this engagement, it's ten times more annoying."
Pietro laughed. "Oh, no. Has she lined up suitors? My parents like to point out every pretty woman they see to me in hopes I'll make a move. It's hardly productive."
"I haven't asked her for fear she'll pull out a folder with all of the eligible bachelors in town," I said, half joking and half serious.
Pietro snickered as Wanda rolled her eyes in the background. She should have been happy I was getting along with her brother. He was actually quite entertaining to be around.
"It's funny you say that because you're one of the women my parents pointed out," he admitted.
"Oh, God, so they're saying the same thing to you?" I asked with a groan, and he nodded regretfully. "Isn't it just the worst?"
"You're a lovely girl, Y/N, don't get me wrong," he began gently, "but I don't like you like that."
I raised my hand for a high five. "Me and you both."
Laughing once again, he returned my high five and I was glad we were on the same page. The amount of people that had been hinting at getting to know Wanda Maximoff's very single brother was getting pretty annoying. It was nice to know he was just as irritated at the insinuation as I was.
"Okay, I should leave you both to it," Pietro concluded, slapping his knees and standing up. Looking to me, he said, "Miss Y/L/N, it was as lovely as ever to make your acquaintance."
I smiled as he winked playfully before looking to his disgruntled sister.
"Dear sister, the pleasure is always mine," he continued to tease, and she slapped him once more, making him dodge her and begin to leave. "Love you, too!" he called before heading back inside.
I laughed at his silliness and relaxed in my seat, looking back to Wanda. She didn't seem half as amused as I was as she drummed her fingers on the table and chewed on the inside of her cheek.
"I may be mistaken, love, but it looks like you're jealous," I poked fun at her.
She rolled her eyes and her jaw tensed before she finally looked to me, expression softening. "Can you blame me?" she asked quietly. "You're both single. You're both similar age. Everybody talks."
I shrugged nonchalantly, having a sip of my tea. "True... but I've got my eye on another Maximoff anyway."
She sighed, small smile creeping on her lips. Subtly moving my chair closer to hers, I grabbed her hand under the table and squeezed. My thumb stroked her hand softly as I leaned on the palm of my hand on the table.
"You look really beautiful today," I admitted in a hushed voice. "I should have told you earlier."
She, too, leaned into the palm of her hand as she watched me with an enchanting gaze. "So do you, milaya (darling)."
Unable to resist, I glanced around quickly before kissing her cheek and pulling away. Letting go of her hand, I busied myself with the tea and biscuits again.
"Biscuit?" I offered her, and she began to laugh at my attempt at acting casual.
Playing along, she accepted the biscuit from my hand. But a knowing smile was on her lips as she nodded. "Thank you."
—
Being with Wanda was a luxury in itself, even if we had to keep it private.
To everybody else, we were merely two women about to become family who happened to create a bond that was close. But we both knew what it really was and weren't eager to say it. Because saying it made it true and that meant that what we were doing became realer than it was in our daydreams and hidden moments.
I did find myself wracked with guilt sometimes – particularly the times when Y/B/N would gush about how excited he was to marry her. Wanda was technically cheating on him with me, his sister, but that fact was something that was still blurry to me.
We had no choice but to lie and be secretive. In a world like this, where we would never be able to be together like we wanted to, all we had was secrecy and deception. Did that still make us bad people?
I tried not to think about what would happen when she actually married my brother. The future was something I was adamant on pushing to the back of my mind because I knew what it would hold and I just wanted to enjoy the time I had with her. Convincing myself that what we had wasn't serious, just a heat of the moment relationship maybe, made things easier to accept. But really, I knew that whenever she looked my way with her signature smile and dazzling eyes, it was way more than I envisioned. She was way more.
So, trying not to be dragged down with the weight of reality, I vowed to myself to only focus on the now. Focus on the moments I shared with her whilst we could. Anything beyond that and I'd surely snap.
"Medovyy (honey), the Y/L/Ns are here!" Iryna called behind her, before looking to my family and I as we stood at her front door. "Please, all of you, come in!"
She ushered us into the main hall before closing the door after us. Perfectly timed, the rest of her family left the living room and came to greet us.
Automatically, my eyes found Wanda's and she was already looking my way, her dimple making a show as she attempted to reign in an excited smile. I did the same, trying to ignore the way my heart stirred upon seeing her.
Oleg and Iryna welcomed my parents and then me, kind expressions accompanying genuine greetings. In the corner of my eye, I saw Pietro shaking Y/B/N's hand before Wanda took his place, accepting a kiss on the cheek from Y/B/N. It wasn't jealousy that I felt whenever they were together, at least not entirely – they were to be married, what more could I expect? – but it wasn't anything pleasant either.
"Ah, my favourite Y/L/N," Pietro beamed upon shaking my hand, making my lips twitch upwards. "You excited for dinner? We're having salmon."
"Ecstatic, Pietro," I answered with a playful eye roll. "All I've been thinking all day."
He chuckled at my sarcasm before letting go of my hand and moving over to greet my parents. Wanda was next, her shoulders relaxing when she stepped before me with a soft smile present on her lips.
"It's good to see you," she said, but her eyes said much more than that. "How have you been?"
Exchanging a friendly-looking hug, my body was warm where she pressed against me. Touching her always sent a rush of emotion through me and I looked forward to it every time.
"I've been good," I answered aloud, before whispering into her ear, "Better now."
She squeezed my waist inconspicuously in response before letting go. "That's good. You know, we've got time before dinner and I wanted to show you the painting I've been working on lately. Wanna see?"
I glanced at my parents and hers for permission, knowing they'd heard her question.
"Just try not to take too long since dinner will be on the table soon," Iryna said with a nod. "It's so good to see you girls getting along."
Breathing out slightly, I smiled gratefully before letting Wanda intertwine our fingers and drag me up the staircase. She led me past several doors before we finally reached hers and she tugged me inside.
As soon as the door closed, she was quick to connect our lips in a heated, desperate kiss. I relaxed against her instantly, my hands falling to her side and pulling her closer. Her fingernails gently scratched the sensitive skin behind my neck, giving me goosebumps, and I let out an involuntary gasp at the feeling.
When we pulled away for a breath, her nose brushed against mine and she pressed a final kiss to my lips, slower and more tasteful compared to the first, before smiling at me.
"I missed you," she said, as if reading my mind.
A breathy laugh escaped my lips. "It's only been a week since we last saw each other, love."
She shrugged, arms laced around my neck. "A week too long."
Raising a brow judgementally, I gave her a knowing look. She wasn't embarrassed in the slightest as her half-lidded eyes met mine with a confident smirk.
"Did you just pull me up here to have a quick snog?" I teased her.
"Well, yes," she said, making me laugh again, before adding, "And I wanted to ask you if you'll go to the park with me tomorrow. A picnic. If you want."
She bit her lip anxiously, eyes darting elsewhere as she waited for an answer. I always found it amusing how she could be so confident one second and then so innocently adorable the next.
"Wanda, I'd love to." My thumb rubbed circles on her waist as I kept ahold of her. "I hear it's supposed to be nice weather tomorrow, too."
She pursed her lips. "Even if it rained, I'd still drag you to the park with me."
"Somehow, I feel like that's true," I countered with a ghost of a smile on my lips. She tried to hide her own smile and I continued, "Was there an actual painting you wanted to show me or...?"
Breathing out with amusement, she intertwined our fingers and pulled me to the back of her room where her 'studio' was. Since the last time I'd visited, there were plenty of new additions to her work, all as wonderful as the next.
"This one is from the beach at Blackpool," she said, stopping before a medium-sized canvas depicting the horizon. "When we sat on the bench. Just before I kissed you."
My heart fluttered at the memory and I studied the canvas, recalling it looked similar to her watercolour painting of the same view. She'd done a spectacular replica in oil paints, reminiscent of the trip we took.
"You should already know what I'm going to say," I said, looking to her knowingly. "But just so you can hear it again, I absolutely love this. You're so talented."
She rolled her eyes to distract from the pink spreading across her cheeks. "Thank you... and again, thank you for taking me. Seeing an actual water source upfront really helped me refine my paintings. It feels so much more real now."
I looked back to the painting, noticing what she meant. Either way, I loved both versions of her work, before and after going to the beach.
"You did good, love."
She squeezed my hand gently before sighing quietly with realisation. "We should probably go back down."
"We should," I agreed, glancing at her. "Thanks for showing me these."
She cracked a smile, teeth nibbling on her bottom lip. "Always."
Reluctantly, the two of us returned downstairs and joined the others as they were settling at the dining table. Wanda and I sat side by side, and this time when her fingers brushed mine, I made no move to pull away.
The meal was good, but as usual, I found myself zoning out. The conversation made its rounds, falling to me as the Maximoffs wanted to know how I was doing, then moved on, giving me chance to focus on eating my dinner and getting through the evening. I knew that at one point, everybody was talking about some play that was showing in the theatres.
Bits of the conversation were going in one ear and out the other and I was minding my own business until Wanda's bare foot rubbed against my leg under the table. The sensation of her skin against mine made my knee bounce up and hit the table with surprise, earning everyone's attention.
"Are you okay, dear?" Oleg asked, noticing my discomfort.
I cleared my throat, straightening up and ignoring the stifled smile Wanda had in my peripheral vision.
"I'm good, sorry about that," I apologised awkwardly, shivering when she dragged her foot back down my leg. "You were talking about the play, right?"
That seemed to distract them, as they leapt right back into conversation, giving me a chance to breathe out with relief. I looked to Wanda, watching her lean on her palm and hide a smirk as she stared at me with mischievous eyes.
Glaring and nudging her in the arm subtly, I looked back to my food, but she didn't move her foot, nor her hand. Both brushed my against me, starting a fire on my skin and making me swallow hard. She kept like that for the whole evening, making my head dizzy and leaving me at a loss for words.
And when I looked her way, she was already staring, definitely knowing the effect she had on me.
—
"I just need to find my shoes and we can go," I told Wanda the next morning, before our date at the park.
She'd come to pick me up at my house and was hanging around my room as I finished getting ready. From her place at my desk, she hummed in acknowledgment before distracting herself with my notebooks.
"I see you're making great use of the notebook I picked out for you," she commented, and I glanced towards her mid-search for my shoes, seeing she was flicking through the already-filled book.
"I have a lot of ideas, what can I say?" I joked, before looking under the pile of clothes near my wardrobe.
She chuckled, before falling quiet again. I wasn't really paying attention to what she was doing until she spoke up after a few minutes.
"Y/N, your writing is beautiful," she said, making me look her way to see an amazed smile on her lips. "I didn't know you could write like this. I mean– I should have because you helped write that letter Y/B/N gave to me, but this..."
I shrugged awkwardly, distracting myself with my search again. "It's okay, I guess."
She exhaled mockingly. "Okay? Y/N, this is miles better than okay. Why didn't you show me this sooner?"
I smiled satisfactorily as I finally located my shoes. Grabbing them, I approached Wanda and took a seat on the edge of my bed, opposite her seat at my desk.
"Because it'll never be anything more than what you're looking at?" I said rhetorically. "It'll only ever be words confined to pages that nobody will see?"
She gave me a knowing look. "I think you forget that my brother is a publisher, dorogoy (dear)."
"And I think you forget that he is the publisher to my brother, dear," I retorted playfully.
She sighed, shaking her head and putting the notebook back on my desk. "You know Pietro would love this, right? He'd sign you in a heartbeat."
I snickered at the ludicrous thought. "Wanda, you're a little biased, love."
She rolled her eyes. "Writers write for audiences. I am an audience. I consume literature. And I'm telling you that it's not just me who would read what you have to write."
I tried not to laugh as I pulled my shoes onto my feet.
"Are you really telling me that you'd never want to get published?" she asked with a raised brow.
My heart ached at the thought of such a fantasy. "Of course I would, Wanda." I met her eyes, which were already peering across from me patiently. "I've dreamed of that. But it's just not what's to happen. My family have told me that many times. In another lifetime, maybe."
She pursed her lips, studying me thoughtfully. I offered her a smile and stood up, holding out my hand.
"Forget that," I told her. "I believe you promised me a picnic."
Thankfully, she dropped the subject and accepted my hand, letting me pull her up. The topic wasn't brought up again and I wouldn't have had it any other way.
We went to the park like she wanted and she brought a picnic basket with her, having packed a lovely variety of finger foods and snacks.
As she was unpacking the food onto the blanket, I narrowed my eyes at her. "You know, now that we're finally alone, I can say how unfair it was of you to do what you did last night."
She played dumb, shrugging, focusing on neatening up the sandwiches on a plate. "I don't know what you mean, milaya (darling)."
"Huh. Sure you don't."
Giggles flew from her lips as she glanced at me through her eyelashes. "I'm sorry, I couldn't help it. I just love seeing you squirm. You get all tense and it's so cute."
I pursed my lips. "I figured. You've been watching me squirm since we met."
She grinned knowingly before straightening up. "Okay, I made sandwiches and there's also some coleslaw, fruit, cheese... I made some Sokovian dishes, too, if you want to try them. Okroshka – it's like a cold soup. Then there's this olivye salad. It's... well, salad."
I smiled at the thought she put into it all and grabbed her hand between us. We'd set the picnic out behind a tree so we wouldn't have curious eyes watching us. It didn't look like we were overtly hiding, but we still got our privacy, too.
"It all looks great, Wanda," I said with appreciation. "I can't wait to try it."
She squeezed my hand in response before letting go to grab some paper plates. After popping a strawberry in her mouth, she asked, "Do you just want a bit of everything?"
I leaned on the back of my hands as I hummed a 'yes'. She began to put me some food in and I watched her, admiring the sight.
Her hair was half-pulled back today, falling in waves down her back and exposing her perfectly sculpted jawline. Everything about her was perfect – the way she moved was elegant and graceful, even when her hair fell over her shoulder and in her way; she simply moved it back with a flick of her hand and resumed what she was doing. The sun caught her immaculately, her hair glowing bright under the light and her eyes magnificently green as they focused.
As always, she took my breath away.
"Here," she said, holding out the plate towards me and pulling me from my reverie.
I accepted the plate and fork, returning her smile, before she watching as she began to make another plate for herself.
"You sure this is fancy enough for you?" I asked jokingly, stabbing my fork into a carrot. "I heard you and my brother went to a very luxurious restaurant the other night."
She met my eyes, holding amusement in her own. "Jealousy doesn't look good on you, milaya (darling)."
I kissed my teeth and rolled my eyes. "I'm not jealous, I just– it's so annoying listening to him talk about how beautiful you are or how funny you are or how kind you are."
"Oh, so you don't think I'm any of those things?" she teased, trying to get a rise out of me.
I titled my head towards her. "Of course I know you're all those things. But it doesn't mean I like hearing him talk about it constantly..."
Clearly amused, she erupted into laughter and I felt my face heating up with embarrassment. I know it sounded like I was whining, but it was true. Sometimes, I wasn't envious of my brother but rather at the fact that he could actually take Wanda out properly. He could be seen with her in public and hold her hand without fear of getting looks or disowned. He had the privilege of being with her and it wasn't fair.
"You may hear him talk about it, but there's one thing I can assure you that you get that he doesn't," she said when recovering from her laughter.
I stared at her with an exasperated sigh. "And what's that?"
She smiled confidently, glancing around quickly, before leaning forward and kissing me softly. As quickly as it came, it disappeared, leaving me desiring more.
Licking my lips, I couldn't tear my eyes from hers. "You know, you're a really good kisser."
She chuckled at my reaction and I found myself leaning in again, entranced by the way she tasted. Putting my plate to the side, I raised a hand to pull her closer, getting better access to her mouth.
She tasted sweet like the strawberry she'd just eaten and I swiped my tongue across her lip, indicating I wanted her to part her them. She did, allowing me to slip my tongue in and wrestle with hers, revelling in the way she tasted. My heart was thumping loudly in my chest as she let out a moan, it reverberating in my mouth and giving me goosebumps.
When lack of oxygen became an issue, she pulled away breathlessly, flushed cheeks adorned with a smile.
"As lovely as that was, I actually want to eat what I made," she ridiculed playfully.
"Yes, we will," I assured her, my hand moving from her neck up to her jaw. My thumb touched her lips, outlining them tenderly, subconsciously committing them to memory. "We'll get back to it."
She wanted to laugh, but I moved forward and caught her bottom lip between mine, unable to stay away. It was wrong, the rush I felt in my gut and the warmth that spread all over my body and the tingles that travelled down my spine. Because I knew what it all meant, but admitting it was a different story. So, I didn't.
I just continued to kiss the girl before me, knowing I could have kissed her forever and not regretted a single thing.
#wanda maximoff au#wanda maximoff x you#wanda maximoff x reader#wanda maximoff#scarlet witch#scarlet witch imagine#elizabeth olsen x you#elizabeth olsen#elizabeth olsen imagine#marvel#mcu#marvel imagine
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went through the goes-wrong-verse playbills/programmes - that is, ‘the play that goes wrong’ and ‘peter pan goes wrong’ (thank you @cornleypolytechnicgoeswrong !) trying to piece together each society member’s career within the society PLUS if possible whatever it was they were doing at the polytechnic (university) course-wise, along with whatever other character snippets they give. this is mostly to inform me when writing but i thought it’d be useful for other mischief/goes wrong fans!
chris bean:
as of TPTGW is the ‘newly elected’ head of the drama society, and is known at the university for his charitable & philanhropic work. he has six acting credits within the polytechnic to his name.
i was going to presume his choice of course at the uni was acting or directing, but his PPGW bio states that his ‘dacting’ (directing and acting) is all self-taught, so who knows. maybe he’s just in the society because of his aforementioned charitable work.
robert grove:
has starred in 40 productions with the society since 2002 (when he began work at cornley polytechnic as a caretaker - i’m taking this to mean he was never actually a student there.) anyway wow explains why they call him a “veteran actor” lol.
he offers acting lessons (reacting, gesturing, emotioning and acting) and can be contacted via twitter @robertgoodactor. i’ve looked this twitter account up and it does exist it’s just not been used since 2017 - that said there are some in-character photos of henry lewis as robert and nancy zamit as annie on there and plenty of tweets.
he runs an extremely dubiously safe cornley youth theatre program and can be contacted at his email [email protected] (membership fees are non-refundable.)
trevor watson:
in TPTGW is arbitrarily from ‘the north east’ (rob falconer’s portrayal, whereas chris leask’s portrayal is firmly and specifically scouse.)
he has a twitter account (rob falconer’s portrayal) @trevtechie, with i think probably the most tweets of the cornley twitters. stopped being updated in 2017.
his participation in haversham was to complete an electronics module - as the light and sound technician i’d assume his course was in this kinda field.
he states that after haversham he wants to never work with the cornley drama society again, but as of PPGW he’s “following in his parents footsteps” and has pivoted to possibly actually studying stage management. (his PPGW bio states that he’s in his final year at the uni for the 3rd time running. so it could mean his staying on with cornley is like partially due to failing his course?)
dennis tyde:
in his TPTGW bio it states that he joined the drama society after failing to get in to any other societies.
he didn’t live on university campus and commuted in from his parents’ house. he mostly just wanted to make friends - he’s interested in snooker and wants to meet like-minded people.
in his PPGW bio he still wants to make friends and says you can reach him via twitter @dennistyde. i checked this account too and again it does exist but hasn’t been used since 2013, and there are only 3 tweets so its much more bare-bones than the others. i like his one tweet about drinking a mug of bovril to calm his nerves before a show.
as of 2021 in promotional vids we learn that dennis and robert now live together.
max bennett:
in TPTGW bio it says he was a first year studying human geography and crime which i was surprised about but sure okay. it also says here that he happily donated “a large portion of his recent inheritance” to the society to help fund it.
at the bottom of TPTGW’s cast page it states that the west end performance of the play is “made possible by a generous legacy from claude bennett” who’s presumably max’s grandfather? or just father? idk
his TPTGW bio also says his favourite movie is the legend of bagger vance which i’ve never seen but is apparently a will smith golf movie.
his hobbies as listed in his PPGW bio are chess, cooking & hanging out with friends and fam. he also dedicates his performance in PPGW to his grandma claire, which is sweet.
annie twilloil:
as of TPTGW she’s designed, built, painted, costumed & stage managed every cornley show for the past 3 years. in the PPGW bio, it states she’s studying cognitive behavioural therapy and pottery, and has taken up life drawing at the student’s union (as the model.)
after haversham, she apparently had an internship lined up at the bolton octagon.
she has WILD backstory in her PPGW bio that says she dedicated her performance to her estranged husband julian who she hoped was in the audiance and two children frangipani and ylang-ylang. not sure if the kids are with her or with the husband but either way, wild. nuts. pretty funny but also pretty tragic.
she’s also got an ad out looking for a new bloke (i suppose if her husband isn’t in the audience) apparently she’s been left by boyfriends previously for an air hostess, a stripper, and a coal miner.
she also enjoys knitting and playing the banjolin (an instrument she made herself.) her email address is [email protected].
she has a twitter account that again hasnt been used since 2017 (@annietwiloil). a couple tweets chronicle dave hearn’s shoulder dislocation but as max so i guess its canon that max also dislocated his shoulder, but he did it while trying to open a twix? lmao
sandra wilkinson:
in her TPTGW bio it states that haversham manor is her 11th production with the company. idk how frequently they put on shows.
she won some kind of local kids beauty pageant in 1998 and did some modelling for a local restaurant (the sunam balti house, which apparently the cornley crew frequent? or have at least been to - seems they struggled with spicyness levels there, especially dennis.)
nothing on her course at the university, i might just take a stab and assume she was actually doing acting, since her bio is mostly about her being a performer.
she’s a big fan of jeremy irvine, they mention him in both of her bios.
jonathan harris:
is a total health & fitness guy. his course at the uni is in physical education and he’s also a model, though who’s to say what for. in PPGW this is expanded and he’s moved on to being a combo model/actor/photographer/lifecoach.
he loves his outdoor sports: mountain biking & kayaking are noted.
he had a bath salts advert out and he hoped it was gonna go national.
lucy grove:
her surname IS grove! i wasn’t sure, but that’s confirmed. not really much about her in there, because the bio is written by robert and he just used it to gas himelf up.
can’t tell if she’s a student at the university or just in the society through robert. genuinely there’s just not a lot to go on when it comes to lucy.
another note is that the murder at haversham manor and the version of peter pan that the cornley crew perform are both written by ‘susie h. k. brideswell’ who i guess either chris knows or chris is a big fan of?
other notes... they try so hard to make out like the characters aren't all the same age like implying that robert is genuinely older than most of them etc etc but ofc the cast featured in the TV broadcasts are all visibly the same age... ofc all this is just comedy innit so you can take it or leave it
also i realised that the american version of TPTGW calls it “the cornley university drama society” since i guess you guys dont have polytechnics over there. a polytechnic is like... a university that offers the arts (among the classics you know science law what have you) basically. by 2021 in promotional videos etc. shields in character as chris has dropped “polytechnic” altogether from the group’s name (but varies between calling it ‘the cornley drama society’ and ‘the cornley amateur dramatics society’) i assume to reflect how much time has passed since the group put on their first production under chris’ leadership - and that now they’re simply operating unattached to the university because they’ve become a real family. love love love, sillyness and love.
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intelligence & issues (Hotch x Fem!Reader) -- chapter eighteen
Helloooo I almost posted this yesterday as a thank you gift and then I totally got caught up in schoolwork. Gotta love finals season am I right
Anywho, thank y’all so much for 1.7k followers <3 Here’s a long ass chapter that’s a good ol’ mix of fluff and angst xx.
Chapter Warnings: waking-up-together kinda fluff, no sexytimes but there are some ~suggestive~ comments of course, ANGST at the end (i’m so sorry), the end of this case is very near on the horizon
Previous chapter || Fic Masterlist
Aaron wakes you when his first alarm goes off at 5a.m. It’s way too fucking early in your opinion, but you know he wants you to have time to go back to Emily and JJ’s room to get ready for the day.
Still, being woken by a kiss on your forehead is something you can see yourself getting used to. Not to mention using his chest as a pillow all night.
You tilt your head to capture his lips in a sweet kiss, not caring that the both of you probably have disgusting morning breath right now.
He pulls away first, nudging your nose with his before he rests his forehead on yours, looking deep into your eyes. “Good morning, sweet girl.”
You can’t help the smile that splits your lips. “Good morning.” You close your eyes in your flustered state, burying your face down into his chest. “I don’t want to leave.”
“I want you to stay,” he whispers, pressing a kiss to the top of your head. “But we’ve got a job to do.”
“I know,” you sigh, opening your eyes to bring yourself back to reality. Then, you hook your arms around his neck, starting to grin. “Same thing tonight?”
He smirks, wrapping his arms around your waist. “Depends on how much of a good girl you are today.”
“Ooh, a challenge,” you tease. “I dunno…I’m feeling pretty bratty this morning.”
You feel his arm tighten around your shoulders, drawing you closer to him in warning.
“I’m just teasing,” you murmur, propping your chin on his chest, giving him your best eyes.
But he isn’t fazed. “I know. I’m keeping track.”
So, naturally, you pout. “Fine.”
“Strike two.”
“I have a feeling this isn’t like baseball. Three strikes and I’m out?”
“Are you trying to find out?”
“Mm, maybe?” You grin, but, as always, the FBI Agent part of your brain comes back to life. “If we didn’t have to be downstairs soon, I’d say yes. But I probably should go get dressed.”
“Understood,” Aaron replies, a small grin on his lips too. “I suppose even as your boss, I can’t keep you here.”
“As my boss, we’re technically not even supposed to be in the same bed together,” you remind him with a snort, but seriousness comes over him. “What?”
“We still need to talk,” he says quietly. “Really talk about this, but right now I just want you to know...I don’t regret this. I want this. No matter the consequences.”
“Me too,” you whisper, fingernails gently scratching the base of his skull, your weak attempt at comfort. “Do you think there’ll be consequences?”
He sighs, and you rise and fall with his chest. “I don’t know.” He pauses. “If Strauss finds out somehow, maybe. I don’t know if keeping it from her until she inevitably finds out is better than telling her ourselves, but…”
“We’ll figure it out,” you assure him with a small smile. “But you wanna do this?”
Instead of answering you verbally, he pulls you closer for a soothing kiss, coaxing all your worries away.
“I want to do this,” he says, knowing you need to hear the words from his voice.
“Okay,” you murmur, taking a deep breath. “What do we do about the team?”
His eyebrows furrow. “What about them?”
You give him a tired look. “Come on. They know.”
“What?” He blurts, sitting up a little, taking you with him. “Rossi knows.”
“And Emily and JJ and Garcia,” you chuckle. “I didn’t even tell them. Emily saw us at dinner one night. JJ figured it out from the phone call a few days ago. Garcia just...knows.”
“What about Morgan and Reid?”
“Are you kidding me? Morgan knows. Have you seen how he irritates the shit out of me every day?”
“Exactly,” Aaron says. “He does it every day.”
“Have you noticed how he’s been doing it especially when you’re around?” You raise an eyebrow. “Come on, you’re our supervisor! I thought you were a better profiler than that!”
“We have a rule not to profile each other,” he says sternly, obviously a little butthurt that he didn’t see that everyone else knew.
“A rule that none of us stick to, by the way,” you laugh. “We just don’t voice it. But we do. Trust me.”
“I didn’t think you’d figured that out yet,” he admits.
“Eh,” you shrug. “It wasn’t hard. I caught myself profiling everyone. I figured I couldn’t be the only one who does it by accident.”
Aaron only smiles. He’s amazed by you every single day. Sometimes he wonders if you even know how intelligent you are. If you even know the full scope of your mind. Maybe you don’t, maybe no one does.
“But anyway,” you swerve back on track. “I feel like it should be unspoken, but just...no PDA, you know? It’s fine that they know because honestly I think they knew before we knew, but let’s not make it a big deal.”
“Agreed,” he nods. “We still need to be professional.”
“Exactly,” you breathe, glad to be on the same page.
His second alarm goes off, the one for 5:30, and you groan, dropping your forehead to his chest.
“Why does it have to be so early?” You mutter, your lips brushing against his skin as you speak. It sends a hot wave through him, one that causes him to promptly shift your body off of him. “What are you doing?”
“You need to go get dressed,” he says. “And if you stay here wrapped around me any longer, I won’t be able to let you leave.”
You grin. “Point taken.”
You roll off the mattress, fully aware that he’s looking at your ass, and at your entire body, marveling at the way you look in his shirt.
“Oh,” you say, doing a dramatic turn, watching his eyes very quickly move back to your face. “Do you have any boxers? I probably shouldn’t walk down the hall in just a shirt.”
He’s scrambling for a pair of his boxer briefs, the thought of anyone else seeing you just like this making his blood boil frighteningly fast.
“Thanks,” you smirk when he hands them to you. And you put them on in front of him, partly for a show and partly because the look he was giving you demanded it. “I’ll see you in an hour or so?”
He nods. “Try not to spend too much time gossiping.”
“Oh, please,” you shake your head. “They’re getting all the details.”
You’re out the door before he can even catch you, and you just know you’re going to get it later.
+++
Emily and JJ are on you as soon as you open the door, both of them dressed and ready, arms folded over their chests like Moms whose daughter stayed out too late last night.
In a way, that’s completely accurate.
“And where have you been?” JJ asks, fully entering her Mom persona.
“Uhm, a friend’s house?” You play along, trying to inch your way to the bathroom.
But Emily knows your move, and stands in front of the bathroom door. “Is this friend named Aaron?”
“...maybe.”
And the façade falls, because they both cheer, pulling you into a hug.
“Finally!” Emily screams.
“Finally, what?” You laugh. “The night before I was also in his room.”
“Oh, we know,” JJ assures you.
“Finally, you admit it,” Emily clarifies. “So...details?”
“So...we have to be downstairs soon and I need to get dressed,” you walk past them to your bag. After grabbing your clothes, you turn back around to find them still staring at you. “What?”
“You’re in his shirt,” JJ says, still smiling.
“And boxers,” you laugh, pulling the hem of his t-shirt up a little. “Guys, don’t make this a big thing.” You pause, heading toward the bathroom. “He was a little upset that I knew everyone knew, and he didn’t.”
“How did he not?” Emily scoffs. “He can be so dense.”
You shake your head, shutting the bathroom door to get dressed.
When you emerge from the bathroom, now dressed and looking more presentable, Emily and JJ are finally getting ready, too. They still watch you like a pair of hawks stalking prey, though. You just hope they won’t make any comments later.
That’s wishful thinking and you know it. But hopefully the comments will be held in at least until you’re all on the jet, heading back to Virginia.
+++
When you walk out of the elevator with Emily and JJ, you find Hotch standing with Rossi, the former looking much more grave than you left him. And he’s on the phone.
“Shit,” you mutter under your breath, picking up the pace. You glance at Hotch, silently asking, and he nods. “There’s another body,” you fill in Emily and JJ, ignoring the strange look that Rossi gives you.
Once Hotch hangs up, he looks immediately at you. “There’s two bodies. Male and female.”
“What?” Emily blurts. “In the same location?”
He nods. “Same house.”
About this time, Morgan and Reid step out of the elevator, jogging over when they see the team’s faces.
“What’s going on?” Morgan asks.
“Two bodies this time, same house, male and female,” you explain briefly.
Hotch jumps in. “JJ: you, Reid, and Y/N head over to the precinct and get Garcia on the phone. Get her to find everything she can on these new victims.”
You nod, glad he’s not sending you to see anymore bloodied bodies. Just the thought has a chill running down your spine.
You don’t want to admit it, but it’s hard not to picture Trevor’s face. It’s hard not to feel the thrill of the possibility of revenge. But you know that’s only the irrational part of your brain. You know you wouldn’t really act on those thoughts.
But they’re still there.
+++
Back at the precinct, you’re dialing Garcia and stirring a cup of shitty coffee. When she picks up, she sounds about as frizzed as you feel.
“Good morning, my angel sent from Heaven,” she sings, sounding far too bright for seven in the morning. “What can I do you for?”
“Good morning,” you chuckle. “We’ve got two new victims.”
“Mm, I know,” she groans, and you begin to hear typing. “Morgan texted me their names, I was waiting for your call.”
“Yep, we just need you to work your magic, that’s all.”
“That I can do,” she replies, no doubt through a smile. “Speaking of magic…”
You already know where this is heading. “Seriously? Who told you?”
“JJ and Emily texted me,” Garcia admits. “But you know I was going to weasel it out of you eventually, anyway!”
“Yes, I know,” you roll your eyes, tossing the coffee stirrer and empty cream and sugar packets in the trash. “Listen, how about this: Once this case is over, we’ll all have a girl’s night at my place with a bunch of junk food and wine, and I’ll give all the details -- whatever they might be at that point.”
You can’t let yourself believe that you’ll still be together because who knows what could happen. Anything could happen. The universe has a bad habit of getting in the way of your love life.
“You know the way to my heart,” Garcia sighs dreamily. “It’s a date. Speaking of dates, it looks like our two victims were married.”
“Married?” You nearly yell. Talk about a plot twist. “And the guy brought our unsub home for a one-night stand?”
“Looks that way so far,” Garcia says with a grimace. “Caroline Merritt, 35, was the CEO of her own company and traveled a lot. It looks like she changed flights yesterday and landed around eleven p.m. She checked her car out of the airport parking lot at eleven forty-five.”
“Great, so she might’ve walked in on our unsub.” You rub your forehead from the stress. “What about the other victim?”
“Jasper Rhodes was 34 and a part-time worker at the local Walmart,” Garcia lists off. “They had been married for three years, but Caroline never changed her last name.”
“Don’t exactly blame her,” you remark. “Alright, which one had allegations?”
“I’m about to burst your bubble, babycakes. Neither of them.”
“Really?”
“Really,” Garcia echoes, just as solemn. “Caroline has a squeaky clean record, aside from one speeding ticket when she was seventeen for going forty-five in a school zone. Jasper also has a clean slate for a record, but he does have one DUI from when he was twenty-two. Nothing else since.”
“It’s been twelve years, so for all we know, he could be sober for a decade now,” you mutter. “Okay. Do they have any connection at all to our other victims? Please say yes.”
“Cross referencing as we speak,” Garcia says, typing furiously. “Almost done… Negative,” she sighs. “I’m sorry, babe.”
“Don’t be sorry,” you shake your head. “Thank you for being such a wizard, as always.”
“It’s my specialty,” she quips. “So...do I get some details about you and Hotch now?”
“Goodbye Garcia…” You chuckle, ending the call before she can ask anything else.
You walk back into the conference room, shaking your head sadly at JJ who looks up with hopeful eyes.
“Garcia found virtually nothing. Caroline got a speeding ticket at seventeen, and Jasper a DUI at twenty-two. Nothing since. And no connection to any of our other victims,” you relay the information, ending it with a sip of your coffee.
“This unsub is good,” JJ says, exasperated. “How is she always three steps ahead of us?”
“She’s not, really,” Reid says, and you can feel something else coming on. “It’s like she knows we’re closing in on her, so she’s going after those who have no reported allegations. She’s not as far ahead as we think, but maybe that’s what she wants us to think.”
“Reid, dude, you’re sounding like a fortune cookie right now,” you laugh. “I get where you’re going with this. But unless they find some DNA at the crime scene, we’re back to square one again.”
“Maybe…” He trails away, getting up to look at the map.
Something is going on in his head, but you’re not sure what. He’ll tell you when he’s finished with it, you’re sure.
In your pocket, your phone starts buzzing. Thinking it’s Garcia, you pull it out and answer without looking, but Garcia’s voice isn’t what you hear on the other end.
“I’m heading back to the precinct,” Hotch says.
“O...kay,” you furrow your eyebrows, mouthing, ‘Hotch’ to JJ. “Why just you?”
“I need to show you something,” he says slowly, like he’s struggling to get the words out. “The unsub left a note.”
“What does it say?” You ask, wondering why it’s like pulling teeth to get him to speak.
“It’s addressed to you,” he finally says, and all the blood drains from your body. “It’s in an envelope and sealed. Your… Your name is on the front.”
You’re not sure what to make of that at all.
“Okay,” you say, your brain unable to really process it. “Okay, we’ll look at it when you get here.”
“I’m sorry.”
“Aaron,” you whisper, pinching the bridge of your nose. “Don’t say that to me. You’re scaring me.” You pause. “What are you sorry for?”
“For this note,” he replies, voice quiet. “For this unsub targeting you, and now for scaring you.”
“What does the note say?”
“I don’t know,” he says. “I didn’t open it.”
“Okay. Just...hurry, I guess.”
“I’m turning into the parking lot now.”
“Okay, see you in a sec,” you murmur, ending the call.
You look up from the phone to find both JJ and Reid staring at you, concern swimming deeply in their eyes. You don’t even have the energy to offer them a reassuring smile. Nothing about this is comfortable for you.
Why would the unsub leave a note addressed to you?
Hotch walks through the precinct doors a few moments later, a man on a mission as he walks directly to the conference room. You’re explaining to JJ and Reid about the note when he walks in, and you fall silent upon seeing him.
He hates that he even called you to warn you, but he had to do something. His mind was racing on the drive. He had to hear your voice, and he knew you were bound to ask why he was coming back on his own, what’s so urgent, so he knew he’d have to tell you.
But the fear in your eyes right now is something he never wants to see again. Ever.
“Where is it?” You say, your voice wavering.
Slowly, Hotch pulls the envelope out of his jacket pocket. It’s in a plastic bag, which is standard protocol for evidence, and you begin searching for a pair of gloves.
You find a pair and start to slip them on, grimacing at the way your hands shake, and using your peripheral vision to see that Aaron is watching you closely.
Once you’re gloved up, he hands you the plastic bag. It feels much heavier than it should.
Carefully, you pull out the envelope, swallowing down the nausea you’re feeling. As Hotch said, your name -- Agent Y/N L/N -- is scrawled on the front in messy handwriting. Fortunately, Reid can examine that, and this letter if it’s handwritten.
You break the seal on the envelope, flinching slightly, and ignoring that you did. But Aaron saw it.
You pull out the note and half of you cries in relief because it is handwritten, and the other half of you feels sheer terror because your business card is taped to the top left hand corner.
“Shit,” you cuss, closing your eyes.
“What?” Aaron asks, taking a step closer, lowering his head to meet your eye level.
“My business card,” you say, opening your eyes again, hating the way things look blurry for a moment. JJ and Reid are just fuzzy figures at the table when you look around the room. “It could’ve been anyone at the meetings. I handed my card to as many that would take it. There’s no way I’ll remember everyone, or even half of them, I mean, I ran out of cards, I had to go stand by Morgan because--”
“Okay, okay, slow down,” Aaron stops you, putting both hands on your arms. “Look at me, please.”
Slowly, the world comes back into focus and you meet his brown eyes, finding your peace there like you have so many other times before. You focus on the weight of his hands on your arms, grounding you, bringing you back.
“I know it’s difficult,” he says. “But you need to breathe.”
You nod, sucking in a deep breath a little too abruptly, not even realizing you had been taking shallow breaths in the first place.
“Good girl,” he whispers, so low that he’s almost mouthing it, careful not to let JJ or Reid hear. And it’s not sexual or sensual this time. It’s comforting. “Can you read the rest of it?”
You nod. “I can help you end your suffering. I can help you avenge. I can help you heal. It doesn’t have to be this way.” You pause, looking up from the note, looking between Hotch, JJ, and Reid. “What does that even mean?”
“Did you talk about your experience during the meetings?” Reid asks.
“A little bit, but I barely scratched the surface of it,” you admit. “And I didn’t mention any names. I might hate him, but...I’d never send a serial killer after him.”
“I know,” Hotch says. “We’re not accusing you of that,” he adds gently. “It’s clear our unsub feels a connection to you now. Something you said must’ve resonated deeply with her.”
“But all I said was that he was my fiancé and that I didn’t report him, so that still gets us nowhere. She’s still a ghost.”
“She’s not a ghost,” he says sternly. “We will find her. You’ve already seen her once.”
“Yeah, but I don’t remember seeing her, Hotch.”
“That doesn’t matter. What matters is she’s reaching out. Which means we’re close.”
“Not close enough,” you protest, tossing the letter back on the plastic bag on the table. “I need to take a walk.” You move toward the door, and he’s following you, so you add quietly, “Alone, please.”
Hotch nods, and watches you go, more worried than he’s ever been in his life.
+++
When Rossi, Emily, and Morgan return to the police precinct, they spot you sitting alone on a bench outside the front doors.
“I got this,” Morgan says, hopping out of the car and heading to you, gesturing for Rossi and Emily to head inside. They share a look and nod, disappearing into the precinct to leave Morgan alone with you.
You don’t even look up from your hands when you see Morgan coming over from your peripheral vision.
“What’s up, kiddo?” He asks, standing in front of you.
“I’m really not in the mood right now, Derek.”
“Too bad,” he shrugs, sitting next to you on the bench, stretching his arm out behind you. “What’s going on? You know I’m just gonna keep buggin’ you until you tell me.”
You snort. “I know.”
“So…” He pauses. “Tell me. It’ll save us both a whole lotta time. And it’ll save you a whole lotta stress, sittin’ there with all that in your head.”
You know he’s right. And you know he’s the only one who really gets it.
So, you tell him what’s wrong.
“The unsub left that note just for me. My card was taped to it, Morgan.”
“And?”
“What do you mean and? It means I laid eyes on her, maybe talked to her, handed her my fucking card, and I still didn’t know it was her.”
“We’re not superhuman, Y/N. We only see what they show us. She probably put on a mask while talking to you.”
“Well now she’s still out there--”
“Listen to me. I ran out of cards too, remember? We started using yours. I easily could’ve given her your card. Hell, I was there with you, I probably looked at her a dozen times, too. Are you gonna yell at me for not recognizing her?”
“No--”
“Then stop doing it to yourself, you hear me?”
“I just… She feels a connection to me. What does that say about me?”
“That you’re a relatable person,” Derek offers, causing you to glare at him. “Hey,” he raises a hand in surrender. “I’m just being logical. It doesn’t say anything about you. Because a serial killer’s view of you is not who you are. You are who you are.”
“Thanks for the fortune cookie.”
“Don’t get that tone with me, kid,” he replies tiredly. “You know you’re not really mad at me, so don’t take it out on me, okay?”
“I know, I’m sorry,” you rub your forehead. “I’m just…”
“It’s not your fault, Y/N.”
“I know that.”
“I know you know that, but you still need to hear it,” he says. “And I’ll always be here to tell you, got that?”
You look over at him with a small smile. “Got it.”
He smiles too, glad to see you’re feeling better. He shoves your shoulder lightly, playfully. “Come on. Let’s get back in there.”
“Yeah,” you nod, standing up.
He walks ahead, but you stay still, wondering if you should even ask what you’re about to ask. But Derek notices your hesitation and turns back around, studying you.
“Spit it out,” he says, knowing there’s something.
“The unsub is trying to talk to me,” you say, shrugging your shoulders nonchalantly. “So...what if we set up a trap.”
“What?” Morgan deadpans, raising his eyebrows, turning his body to completely face you.
“What if we--”
“Use you as bait?” Morgan finishes, incredulity coating his words.
You nod. “I wasn’t going to word it like that, but--”
He scoffs, looking more and more pissed off as the seconds go on. “Hell no. Are you outta your damn mind?”
“No, I’m not. I’m--”
“No,” he stops you, holding up his hand, pointing at you. “Don’t you dare finish that sentence. Don’t go there. We will find this unsub, and we will do it without you sacrificing yourself.”
“I wouldn’t be sacrificing myself!” You protest. “You guys would be there. You’d have my back.”
“We can’t predict everything this unsub will do, Y/N, you know that,” Morgan fires back. “And I’ll be damned if I let you throw yourself into danger like this. It’s not happening. You hear me?”
SIghing, you nod. “I hear you.”
“Have you even told Hotch about this?”
“No.”
“Good. Don’t,” Morgan replies. “You’ll just get a lecture and you and I both know you don’t need that right now.”
“I know.”
He pauses, shaking his head. He steps forward, wrapping you in a hug, eyes closing when he feels you burying your face in his neck. “I love you, kid,” he whispers. “And I know it’s hard, but you got this, we got this. And it’s gonna be okay. Okay?”
“Okay,” you nod into his neck, taking a deep breath. “Yeah.”
Next chapter
#intelligence & issues#aaron hotchner#aaron hotchner x reader#aaron hotchner x you#aaron hotchner x y/n#hotch#hotch x reader#hotch x you#hotch x y/n#fem!reader#aaron hotchner x fem!reader#hotch x fem!reader#angst#fluff#criminal minds#criminal minds fanfic#criminal minds fanfiction#aaron hotchner fanfic#aaron hotchner fanfiction#hotch fanfic#hotch fanfiction
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Better late than never?? Supposed to post on the day itself but of course I couldn’t. This is my rushed contribution to the prompt: domestic mixed with black knight&princess.
ShinRan Week Day 6
Prompt: Domestic (+ Black Knight&Princess)
Words: ~2.5k
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“Not just once, but twice! Who was it that saved my life again? Oh, unnamed knight with the black cloak, if you will grant me my wish… Please take off that dark mask and show me your true face!”
“If that is what, uh, the princess wishes, I shall show you my sorrow- sorrowful? - face under this moonlight. Oh wow this is cheesy.”
Ran leans on the arm of the couch, bound script covering her resigned face. If she had a hundred yen for every single complaint coming out of this detective’s mouth, she’d have enough to buy two entrance passes to Tropical Land for each day of the week, plus snacks and drinks.
“I went here because I thought you’d be a more immersive practice partner than ‘tou-san. You are worse.”
“I’m sorry, princess, if my mom being an actress ruined your expectations of me.”
“Oh, for sure. And otou-san doesn't destroy the scene by dropping nonsensical comments. And lie on the couch while reading the script. So he’s better by a lot.”
Shinichi props his body up, eyes rolling sarcastically before throwing a look at the lady on the edge. “To be fair, you came barging into my house so early on a Sunday. This is justified.”
“Shinichi, eleven in the morning isn’t early.”
With a stubborn grumble, the detective flops back into the cushions, script on his lap sliding to the floor. “ ’M tired Ran, long case last night, let me sleep.”
“Please, you’re my last option! School festival is in less than two weeks, and I can’t possibly ask Araide-sensei to spare time on a weekend outside of our rehearsal schedule when he’s busy working—”
The lightning speed Shinichi jolts upright causes Ran to cut herself short. “Araide-sensei is the cloaked knight?”
“Yes, didn’t I tell you?”
“You didn’t.”
“Really? I-” she pauses, delayed in taking in the curt iciness of his response when he was so apathetic five seconds ago. On anyone else it’s clear what that tone implies, but she’s never heard it on him.
“Do you have a beef with Araide-sensei?” she asks.
“A beef?”
Ran arches an eyebrow, skeptic. Shinichi meets her gaze, eyes slightly thinning before glancing away, cheeks crimson.
“I mean— Why Araide-sensei? Shouldn’t he be busy, I dunno, being a doctor, than being a fictional knight or something.”
“All the guys in our class were too shy and declined, so Sonoko asked Araide-sensei when he happened to come in for a checkup. He agreed so easily! Would you believe he’d taken a lot of lead roles in plays when he was a student?”
“And that was fifteen something years ago.”
“He’s also good at things like emphasizing lines and handling a woman!”
“Anyone can- What?!”
“Stop being a sourpuss Shinichi, especially when you’re the first to decline.”
He looks at her quizzically. “I did?”
“You don’t even remember?” Amidst the faint pink on her cheeks, disappointment etched on the way Ran’s lips curve to a small pout. “You were the first Sonoko asked... You were so quick to turn her down, she said.”
Astounded by the revelations docking in his brain all at once, Shinichi struggles to recall the conversations he had exchanged with Sonoko the past weeks. None stands out. If she had included Ran’s name in there, he would remember instantly. But Sonoko didn’t. Suddenly, the floodgates in his mind open.
If he finds out later on about the plot and the cast, he’ll definitely find a reason or two to sulk, if not object. Whether Ran is partnered with someone else or Araide-sensei doesn’t matter, for as long as it isn’t him. Him who she’s positive would outright reject her offer to act as a prince because why would he? In any case, god knows Sonoko omitted Ran’s name on purpose for this.
The sly woman has stirred something up, and she will proudly take the front row seat on his reaction she was so sure he’d make.
Not saying Sonoko’s predictions are right. This is just how she thinks. And he won’t react the way she expects he will. She is not right.
Not. Right.
Sonoko, yaro...
“Stand up, let’s do this.”
“Huh?”
“You want immersive? I’ll give you immersive.”
Left with little time to process as Shinichi pulls her by the hand, Ran drops her script on the floor. The sudden shift in character is unbelievable. How can someone so sleep-deprived turn into someone this enthused in a span of a breath?
“But first, let me…” He leaves the room, and Ran picks up her script, still quite lost. Whatever she said earlier must have triggered something, and she’s torn if she’ll ask once he returns but considers the possibility that he may break character. Not gonna risk that. He said he’ll give her an immersive practice, and it’s oddly unexpected, but she’ll take it. This is good. After all, she needs him as the knight.
Wants him as the knight.
“Sheesh, Ran, stop…” Shying away from her own maidenly thoughts, Ran flips to the designated page, scene, and line, rehearsing as she waits.
Some minutes later, Shinichi reappears, holding his script and something else. Of all things she would expect him to own, a blue fancy Columbina mask adorned with elegant silver and royal patterns wasn’t one of them.
“Mom has these things, okay,” he explains, putting it on. Ran isn’t sure if she wants to laugh or tease, but she does neither when she gets a glimpse of him with half of his face covered, and she catches her breath at the sight.
Standing against silk red curtains and brilliant glow of afternoon sunlight, he really does seem like a mysterious knight…
“Don’t laugh, idiot. After doing this for you. Wear this,” he says, and Ran zeroes in on the line of his lips because she has nowhere else to look at as he places a small barrette tiara on her hair. Doesn’t matter what he says, what they wear, even if they fail to match the daintiness of the mask and tiara. Shinichi with this on makes Shinichi as the knight much more vivid now. And Ran as the princess...
“Sorry!” She claps a hand on her warming cheek, pulls back a dumb smile she doesn’t notice she is wearing. “And I— I wasn’t laughing!”
“Still smiling creepily though.”
“I wasn’t being creepy! Geez. Anyway! Page-”
“Page 27, Scene 8, Line 10. Got it.”
After some short blocking instructions, they drop their scripts on the couch, and begin.
“Oh, unnamed knight with the black cloak, if you will grant me my wish… Please take off that dark mask and show me your true face!”
“If that is what the princess wishes, I shall show you my sorrowful face under this moonlight.”
Two steps forward and he removes the mask, and time slows down. She’s seen the same face a million times yet this time, her heart leaps like she’s laid eyes upon the most handsome face in the universe.
“Might—Might you be Spade?” She carries on, taking everything she can to maintain composure. “Long ago, you were banned from this land by my father… but now you’ve become the prince of Trump Kingdom...”
It’s nerve wracking, the way he’s strikingly still, eyes laden on her, either waiting for her next lines or admiring how beautiful she is with the tiara, she isn’t quite sure. The mask is gone, but he isn’t breaking character. Meanwhile, she’s trying her darned best to stay as Princess Heart of Bridge Kingdom.
“If you have… not forgotten about our childhood promise, then please…”
A nervous lump forms in her throat as she wraps her arms around his shoulders, and his hands find her waist, and she nearly gasps but holds it in because right now, she’s Princess Heart, not Mouri Ran asking this of Kudou Shinichi. “Please, show me on these lips.”
“As my princess so desires...”
It should be ‘the’, not ‘my.’ And there’s supposed to be another line after that, but nothing stops him as he leans in ahead of time and her eyelids flutter to the erratic beat of her heart. It’s better to be partnered with Araide-sensei in this after all. He will not mess up his lines, and she will not lose her mind the way she’s losing it now.
Two parted lips are a pucker away when the doorbell chimes, making both jolt.
Ran is first to snap out of character, as if she hasn’t had the urge to earlier.
“That—That must be Sonoko. I forgot to tell you... I invited her in.”
“Oh, great,” Shinichi says.
Forcing her limbs into working order, Ran disentangles slowly, drawing a distance. Shinichi glances at the mask in his hand, then at her, before tossing it to the couch and turning for the door. From the window, she watches him walk to the front gate, scratching the back of his head in an annoyed manner like she just woke him from sleep, but grumpier. She hasn’t seen him display much emotion on a Sunday noon the way she’s seeing him now.
Maybe I shouldn’t have bothered him, she sighs, her turn to slump onto the couch this time.
-
“As I was saying, the prod already scouted the finest material for the costumes, and I decided, pink suits Princess Heart— Hello? Are you listening?”
Ran nearly drops the knife she holds if not for her inhuman reflexes. “Of course! Princess Heart in pink! Yes.” Like nothing happened, she resumes slathering jam and butter on the toast she’s preparing for the three of them. She doesn’t need to look at her side to know Sonoko’s eyeing her from head to toe.
“What happened to her?” The woman turns to Shinichi who sits at the high stool by the kitchen island.
“Dunno,” he says, sounding as noncommittal as he probably appears. Her back is turned against him, but she can see his face, and god why is she blushing?
“I just helped her rehearse. For the play,” he adds.
“Oh?” Sonoko’s brow perks up her forehead, hair whipping as she turns between her and the boy across them. “Did you?”
“Yup. Page 27.”
The dramatic gasp that tears from their friend’s throat is exactly the kind of gasp they expected; even so, Ran still flinches as Shinichi’s stool rakes the floor. “You kissed and I didn’t see?!”
“Hah?!”
“No!”
The two yelp in unison.
“That’s sly! You have to do it again! I’ll judge.”
“Excuse you! It didn’t happen, what you’re thinking!”
“Sonokooo!”
“Oh, shush, Ran, this is good practice. Good practice.”
“But—”
“Relax, rehearsal is rehearsal! In the actual play, once it’s Araide-sensei, he’ll do a better job—”
“I’m going to the toilet,” Shinichi gets off the stool, jaw stiff, out of the kitchen.
“—with a hug than a kiss. Right?” Sonoko ends, once Shinichi is out of the room.
“What?” Ran’s expression is inscrutable as she faces Sonoko completely, the flush across her face befitting embarrassment or ire. “You’re losing me here!”
“Oh, you’re not going to kiss, Ran. The lights will dim before your lips touch.”
“Then why—” she puts down the bread and walks in haste to the island to flip through the script, “Wh— That’s not in here!”
“Sonoko-sama hereby deems the script revised now that we have Araide-sensei.”
“Eh...?!” Ran cannot explain the play of her reactions. On one hand, a cloud is cleared from her mind, having to worry no more about doing something she has no experience with in front of watchful eyes. On the other, bunch of half-formed thoughts whirl through her mind that goes, Shinichi and I almost kissed for nothing, for nothing we almost k-kissed, an almost kiss with Shinichi, almost—
“That won’t do! I mean— That’s so not you! T-To choose a hug over a...”
“Duh, Ran! Even if it’s just a play, I won’t enable a kiss scene between a student and a staff member. We can fake the kiss. That, or switch to hug. Or better yet, change the male lead.”
“Change the male lead? In two weeks? Who will agree?!”
“Easy.” Just in time, Shinichi returns, hands in pocket and long face worn all the way to the stool. “I know someone who will.”
-
‘Once it’s Araide-sensei, he’ll do a better job…’ What? Kissing Ran? Shinichi wants to puke. Sonoko needs to think things through. If this is part of her plan, it’s unacceptable, it sucks.
There’s no way, no way anyone can do a better job kissing Ran than…
“Aaaargh, what are you thinking!” He ruffles his hair in dismay, curses here and there. He only wanted to help Ran yet he almost went for it. Not as Spade but as himself. The audacity. It’s part of the script, sure, but—
If it is part of the script, then have Ran and Araide-sensei rehearsed it before?
“That’s it,” Shinichi huffs, storming out of the bathroom. If this is the kind of reaction Sonoko wants from him, she’s in for a show. Not just a show but a lifetime of curses and mental stabs. For her to go this far is unbelievable. Did Ran even agree to that? Will such a scene really happen in the play? No matter how despicable Sonoko’s methods are, he has faith she respects Ran’s preference as the female lead. No offense against Araide-sensei, but he cannot take Ran’s first kiss, whether as Spade or not.
That is not to say he knows Ran’s preference, especially when it comes to a first kiss, but… it’s not... Araide-sensei... is it?!
He cannot ascertain, not when Ran did nothing when they were about to kiss…
Okay, halt there, self. I said immersive. That’s immersive. She was acting.
All was but an act. She’s a great actress. I suck. No need to make this a big deal.
Shinichi is a pitiful mess once he’s back in the kitchen.
“My offer still stands, you know.” Sonoko sits beside him, munching a toast, while Ran is busy returning the jam in the cupboard, back against them.
“Your offer?”
Shinichi glances at Ran, then at Sonoko, with that feral grin on her lips and Shinichi does a bad job looking pissed, and it’s maddening because he is pissed, just not obvious with the blush forming across his cheek.
Reprimanding Sonoko is what he intends to do. For doing him dirty, him and Ran dirty, for dragging a staff to be the male lead, for imploring Ran to give her first kiss she’s probably saving in a different setting. All invalid reasons, when he cared less about the play before. He’s a full-time idiot, and Sonoko knows it clearly that’s why she’s offering the role again. He doesn’t want to fall into her trap, the same way he doesn’t want anyone else to be Spade when Princess Heart is Ran.
But Ran looks over her shoulder and they accidentally lock eyes, and pink blooms across her cheeks before she turns around, and suddenly the words that leave his mouth completely betray the thought process he underwent in the bathroom.
“If Ran agrees, yeah,” he says.
.
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#shinranweek2021#day 6#late entry#shinran#kudou shinichi#mouri ran#fanfic#oh my god this is all over the place AHAHA#i dont want to leave this in my draft forever tho so here ya go!!
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Blind Date (continued)
You invite Colson in after your blind date
Request: “I loved this so much! If you get the chance and are up to it, I’d love a second part!” ”I would like to read a second part of it”
Colson X Reader
Warnings: cursing
A/N: Have I edited this? No. Did I even look back over this after I wrote it? Also no
Word Count: 1974
Your hand touched the handle before you turned around, finding Colson in the same situation at his car door, still looking at you. “Do you maybe wanna… come in?” You asked, biting your lip. His face lit up, a smirk highlighting his features.
“I would love that.”
The man’s lanky figure strutted over to your front door as you opened it, pausing as he entered to take in the smell of your house that screamed you. He let his eyes wander around the place as he stepped further in, taking off his coat and shoes at the front entryway.
You moved into the kitchen, pulling out a bottle of red wine while he made his way into the space. You found a note on the counter from your best friend and roommate.
Staying at Eric’s tonight in case you and your date need the place to yourself <3
You rolled your eyes at the note, chuckling as you tossed it in the trash. You rustled through your drawers to grab a corkscrew, fiddling with the bottle as Colson shuffled into the room, standing behind you to encase you in his arms.
He took the corkscrew from your hands and opened the bottle with ease. “I was getting there,” you whined jokingly.
He chuckled, “I could see that.” You turned around and allowed your lower back to rest against the counter, squeezed between the surface and Colson. His arms rested on the countertop on either side of you, his figure leaning to be level with you.
You couldn’t help but admire his features, his bright blue eyes and the stubble on his jaw sparking your artistic mind. “I wish I could sketch you right now,” you murmured your thoughts aloud.
He smirked, leaning closer into you, your lips almost meeting, “why don’t you?”
You smiled, pressing a soft kiss to his lips before softly speaking, “you would get bored being my model.”
He pulled away from you, fingers running across your waist until they found your hands, intertwining your fingers. “I would be honored to be your model.”
You perked an eyebrow, “seriously?”
He shrugged, “I’ve done it before for cameras, and you are much more interesting than photographers.” He pulled you away from the counter, “go get your stuff and I’ll pour wine.”
Rolling your eyes, you walked towards your art room, which was really just your bedroom, “don’t say I didn’t warn you.”
When you returned, he was wandering your small living area, a glass of wine in his hands and one on the small coffee table. His eyes danced along the picture frames you and your roommate had placed around the house when you first moved in, which you honestly hadn’t looked at since.
You stepped into the room with your sketchbook and pencils, making your presence known. His gaze drifted to you with a smile, watching you settle onto the couch, “so, is this your roommate?” He motioned towards one of the pictures.
You glanced up, smiling at the goofy picture you two had taken at graduation, “yep, that’s us.” You turned your head back to your book, flipping to the next blank page as he continued asking about your pictures.
“Who’s in this one?” He asked, pointing to a photo of your roommate and her boyfriend, Eric.
You chuckled at the image of them pulling funny faces in the front seat of a car while you sat in the background looking bored, “that’s Eric, her boyfriend. We went on this huge road trip and they swore I wouldn’t have to third wheel, but I obviously did.”
Colson let out a small laugh, taking a sip of his wine, “and who is that?”
You had honestly forgotten about the picture he was pointing to, but seeing it made your stomach fill with unease. “Oh, I forgot that was still up,” you sighed at Colson’s curious expression, “that’s me and my ex, TJ. We broke up months ago, I thought I’d gotten everything of his out of here.”
Colson could see the discomfort in your expression, sitting down on the armchair next to your couch, throwing his legs over the side and posing dramatically. “Bad ex, huh?” You nodded, not wanting to make him uncomfortable with the conversation, though you wanted nothing more than to open up to him. “I’ll tell you mine if you tell me yours.”
You rolled your eyes, turning so you could face him, “of all the poses, that’s what you pick?”
He smiled innocently, “yep.” A chuckle fell from your lips as you looked down at your sketchbook, pressing your pencil to the paper. “Fine, I’ll go first,” he began, “can’t really get to know each other if we don’t get at least a little bit of trauma out of the way.”
You looked up at him and giggled, “you got me there.”
He sighed, taking a sip of his wine, “Baze told me not to talk about it, but the look on your face when I asked you about him tells me you might be able to relate.” You raised an eyebrow but kept drawing, giving him a silent signal to continue. “I was dating this girl for a while, you’ve probably heard of her, Megan Fox.”
Your eyes went wide at the name, looking up at him in shock, “yeah, because that’s not an intimidating act to follow at all!”
Colson waved you off, “you’re doing great so far, don’t even worry about it.” You gave him a stern look, but he only continued with his story, “anyways, we were together for a while and she told me all the time she thought we were soulmates, and I believed her, you know?” You bit your lip, starting to feel slightly intimidated as he spoke about the woman. “But then she cheated on me after, like, 9 months. And I realized after we broke up how wrong we were for each other and how much she manipulated me.”
You frowned as he spoke, his tone getting sadder with each word. ���That’s so shitty. I don’t understand why people cheat in long term relationships, especially after you’ve given them so much hope and trust. Like someone convinces you that they love you and then they go around and pull that shit. It’s evil.”
He nodded, a slight smile on his face, “I’m over it now though, in case you were worried. Came to the realization about a month or two later that I was better without her.”
You held the pencil in your hands still, trying to find the words you needed to say. “I, uh, I was dating that guy, TJ. We had been friends for a while and he asked me out and I said yes. Everything was great, you know? And then like almost a year end he starts acting all weird and possessive. Like just because we had been together for so long means he doesn’t have to treat me like his girlfriend anymore. He would make me feel like shit in front of our friends and just all around was being a shitty boyfriend.” Colson stared at you intensely with a frown on his face, eyebrows furrowed.
“A guy should never do that shit to his girl. You don’t deserve that shit, no one does.”
You nodded sadly, “yeah, well, then I found out like 4 months into all of this that he had cheated on me and gotten the girl pregnant so… I ended things real quick.” You let out a sad huff, turning your attention back to the book and continuing your sketch of the beautiful man in front of you. “I was really upset at first but now I’m just kind of angry. Dude was a dick.”
Colson let out a dry laugh as you took a long sip of wine, “sounds like it. I’m sorry you went through that shit.”
You shrugged, smiling up at him, “if I hadn’t, we wouldn’t be here.”
He chuckled, biting his lip, “guess something good came out of it.”
A blush spread across your cheeks, “oh yeah, the food was amazing.” Your words were full of sarcasm, yet the pout on his face still made you giggle, “I’m joking, loser.”
“You better be miss second-date.” You giggled but didn’t respond, turning back to draw him. It was quiet for a few moments, your pencil tracing along the paper.
He shifted, at which you glared up at him, “I told you you’d get bored.”
With a chuckle he said, “I’m not bored. I get to look at you while you draw, it’s far from boring.” You tried to look annoyed at him but failed miserably at his flattering words. “I was thinking though, since it’s my picture and all, I should get to make some executive decisions.”
You scoffed, “you chose your pose, what else would you like oh great model Colson?”
He rolled his eyes playfully, stretching his arm out to set his glass on the table. “Well, I mentioned that I have some tattoos,” he reached for the hem of his shirt, pulling it up, “you should draw them.”
Once his shirt was fully removed from his body, you couldn’t help but gawk just a little. His entire chest was covered in ink, designs beautifully engraved into his skin. “I was gonna make a joke about this only being our first date but holy shit, these are beautiful.”
He blushed, looking down shyly, ”I was honestly scared you weren’t gonna like them.”
You looked at him with wide eyes, “Seriously? This is so cool. I’m an artist, you really think I’m not gonna like tattoos? Its an art form in itself.”
Colson shrugged, moving back to his pose, expecting you to continue your drawing. Instead, your eyes wandered his torso, taking in every detail of the work. “If you’re lucky,” he commented slyly, “one day I might show you all of them.”
You rolled your eyes with a scoff, moving back into drawing position, “you think you’re so cool.”
A breathy laugh fell from his lips, “I do, actually.”
The two of you continued banter-laced conversation while you drew him, his likeness coming to life on your page. At some point it turned into 3 am, and you were struggling to keep your eyes opened, but you were finished.
“Here.” You turned the book to him, letting him take in your work. He didn’t speak for a few moments, causing worry to build in you. “I mean, it’s no Mona Lisa but-“
“That is fucking amazing.” He cut you off with a wide smile, “you make me look hot.”
You rolled your eyes with a grin, “I’m not going to feed your ego by saying something super lame like “that’s just what you look like,” but I’m glad you like it.” He chuckled at your response, climbing off of the chair to stand in front of you.
“Damn, I was really hoping to get my ego fed tonight.” He grabbed the sketchbook from you and threw it onto the couch next to you before grabbing your hands and pulling you up to stand.
You smiled to yourself, chest shaking with silent laughter, “does the sketch not feed it enough?”
He shook his head, “I need the approval of a really pretty girl to satisfy its hunger.”
Rolling your eyes, you leaned up into him, “you gotta work harder than that, Rockstar.” Your words came out breathy against his lips as he wrapped his arms around your waist.
His mouth connected to yours, the kiss deep and passionate. His soft lips meshed perfectly with yours, his hands pulling you up to stand on your tiptoes. Once you pulled away you stayed close to him, breathing in his intoxicating scent. He whispered, “I never thought a blind date could turn out so well.”
#mgk#mgk imagine#mgk fluff#machine gun kelly#machine gun kelly imagine#machine gun kelly x reader#Colson baker#colson x reader#colson baker imagine#colson baker fluff#colson imagine
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Unchanging
Synopsis: He was content with the simplicities life had to offer, while you sought out the world.
Pairing: Saiki Kusuo x artist!reader
Genre: Fluff, Slight Angst
Word Count: 3.6k
You first heard of him back in your second year of high school. There was nothing about Saiki Kusuo that stood out to you, but your good friend, Yumehara Chiyo, thought otherwise.
“Don’t you think Saiki looks like a prince? He’s so dreamy that I can’t keep my eyes off of him. He’s so cool and mysterious,” your friend blabbered. If by cool and mysterious, she meant cold and aloof, then you completely agreed.
Even the popular pretty girl, Teruhashi Kokomi, seemed enraptured by him, despite Saiki’s unwillingness to shower her any attention like every guy in school. She never told you about her crush on him, but it was obvious through her body language alone that she was smitten by the pink-haired boy.
You didn’t understand their fleeting infatuation for someone they hardly knew - never experienced the feeling of falling hard for someone from the depths of your soul that they were the only person you could think about. And you were perfectly content with that. You had bigger dreams to achieve than a small high school romance that wasn’t guaranteed to last long anyway.
The Okinawa school trip was an outing that all the second years in PK Academy were looking forward to, you included. Although you had a feeling that your friends, Chiyo and Kokomi, had different intentions for tagging along.
They must have been so elated that the three of you ended up in the same group with the boy they liked.
You carried on disregarding Kokomi and Chiyo’s painfully obvious antics to spend time with their beloved prince charming until later that evening when you decided to take a walk outside the hotel alone. You convinced yourself that a late-night stroll would be an enjoyable pastime, but really, you wanted to get away from the love-struck fantasies of your two friends who were oblivious of the fact that they were both pursuing the same boy.
You don’t know how long you’ve been wandering around, but by the time you returned, the hotel had disappeared from your sight. Two recognizable figures stood by a large hole torn on the ground. A battered ship had risen from the gap where the building used to be.
Toritsuka Reita from Class 2-2 stood next to your pink-haired group member while Saiki had a hand directed at the ship, indicating that he was the one causing it to float midair. Your jaw dropped in disbelief at the sight before you.
Saiki turned his head in your direction as if he knew you were there all along. He kept his usual blank composure, although you could recognize the wary look in his eyes as he stared at you. Toritsuka panicked upon the realization that you were there to witness the whole scene.
You didn’t know how you should've reacted when the two boys told you of their psychic powers.
“I won’t tell a soul,” you promised.
‘I know,’ Saiki’s voice echoed into your mind.
The rest of the trip went by smoothly after that incident. Kokomi subsequently spoke out about the crush she had on Saiki, and Chiyo announced that she had fallen for Kaidou Shun.
You shook your head in wonder at the orange-haired girl. It was astonishing how quickly she was able to abandon her feelings for one boy and move on to someone else so quickly.
You realized that love was brief and ever-changing like the ticking seconds on a clock. There was no point in wasting time on such a fickle emotion when the only thing you would devote yourself to were your ambitions for the future.
Nevertheless, a subconscious bond had been formed between you and Saiki after you learned his secret.
You shared a glance with the psychic from afar as Kokomi relayed to you the dream she had of the boy she liked.
He was kinder and a lot less indifferent than you originally thought. Saiki wouldn’t admit it, but you would notice the subtle acts he performed to help out a troubled stranger and the small deeds he initiated to prevent harm from coming across the people around him.
You finally acknowledged Saiki as a friend after he deliberately shared his umbrella with you during a particularly rainy day.
‘Good grief. I was feeling generous today, so this is nothing. Just make sure to come to school prepared next time,’ he had told you after you first rejected his help in worry of troubling him.
You found out much later that he could have stopped the rain with his abilities.
The empty café was tranquil save for the scratching of your pencil as you scribbled on your sketchbook. Saiki sat across from you, paying you no attention just as you did to him. His usual stoic expression was abandoned as he blissfully devoured his coffee jelly.
“I have a dream. After high school, I’ll travel around the world for a bit. I’ll join a bunch of art competitions and win a bunch of awards. Then eventually, I’ll go to an art school in New York so I can major in Illustration. And maybe I might even make a best-seller manga one day,” you mused.
‘Isn’t it a little too early for us to think about the future?’ Saiki retorted.
“Maybe. But I’ve had this dream for as long as I can remember.”
Art class was the subject you looked forward to the most in school. Not only because you excelled in many art mediums, but also because you took pride in the techniques you honed over the years of endless practice.
For the day’s lesson, you were to pair up with one person in the class and draw each other’s portraits. You casually looked around the room in search of anyone available.
From the corner of your eye, you noticed Kokomi rushing up to Saiki with an excited smile as she called out, “Saiki, do you want to-” a majority of the boys in class crowded around her before she could say her piece. Saiki walked up to you instead, asking if you wanted to pair up with him.
You glanced briefly at Kokomi, feeling a tad bit guilty for stealing her choice of partner while she was being surrounded by her group of fans hoping that she would choose one of them. But you couldn’t bring yourself to reject the pink-haired boy’s request.
Taking a seat from across each other, you adjusted your easel so you could get a better view of Saiki’s face. Despite the red tint dusting your cheeks from the intimacy of his peering gaze, you couldn’t bring yourself to look away from him. You perceived for the first time that Saiki was actually quite good looking.
You looked down at your page so you could sketch his appearance: the antennae on his head, his green glasses, soft pink hair, slender neck, smooth lips, chiselled face, sharp eyes. You looked up to take a quick peek at him again.
The constant blinking on his impassive face made your eyes widen in amusement and you frantically placed a hand over your mouth to prevent a snort from escaping.
‘Why are you laughing?’
“Because you’re blinking so much that it looks ridiculous,” you explained with a chuckle.
‘I have to keep on blinking so my x-ray vision resets. I’m trying to get a look at your face.’
You let out another coy giggle despite the heat rushing to the tips of your ears. He looked down at his paper to continue his piece with a warm smile barely present on his face.
You concentrated on your own illustration, marking down his affectionate expression before Saiki could return to his blank face, and showing it off as soon as you finished.
‘Not bad. Now take a look at mine.’
He flipped his paper over, exhibiting an intricate and beautiful portrait. The focused expression he depicted on your face while you drew him looked so alluring. You almost didn’t recognize it as your own, even though it was practically a mirror image.
"This looks way too realistic for someone who's trying not to stand out."
'It should be fine if it's you.'
You didn't understand what he meant, but his words caused butterflies to flutter in your stomach.
‘I need your help,’ A familiar voice spoke in your mind.
You jumped in surprise at the unexpected appearance of the pink-haired boy you had grown fond of. Your sketchbook flew out of your lap, falling right at your feet.
“How did you know I was here?” You asked with a huff.
‘In case you forgot, I can hear your thoughts. I know that sometimes you like to come here to the school rooftop during lunch.’
“Oh,” you uttered. “Well, since you came all this way to see me, what can I do for you?” You raised an eyebrow in curiosity.
'I need you to help me reject Teruhashi.'
You pursed your lips in uncertainty.
"Kokomi is my friend, and as her friend, you can't expect me to hurt her feelings."
'As my friend, you can't expect me to lead her on when I don't ever intend on returning her feelings. She'll get hurt either way. All I'm asking is for you to help me avoid her so she'll get over me.’
You knew he was right, but you were still unsure of meddling in a situation you weren't a part of, especially when it involved the feelings of your close friend. You looked out the window in contemplation.
“Why are you asking me? Mikoto would be a better choice.”
‘I trust you more, so it has to be you.’
You ignored the churning in your stomach as you casually threw your hands up, giving in to his request.
“I’ll see what I can do.”
‘Thank you.’
Saiki bent down on one knee, reaching out to grab your fallen sketchbook.
“I can pick that up myself, you know, or you if you wanted to help me that badly, you could’ve done that levitation thing you always do.”
‘I know.’
He held the book out, watching you through his glasses while he knelt by your feet. A saying Chiyo once told you a long time ago reverberated at the back of your mind: “Don’t you think Saiki looks like a prince?”
You gripped the sketchbook in his hand. Saiki’s gaze burned on your orbs as your image reflected off his green lenses. Neither one of you let go, even when your fingertips brushed against one another.
“What colour are your eyes?” You wondered.
‘Violet.’
“Major in Economics at Sayftee University and major in Literature at both Komman University and Ahvraj University,” you read out Saiki's school survey. “These are all surprisingly in character for you, but do you really have no dreams beyond living an ordinary life?”
‘I’m too busy thinking of ways to stop the volcano eruption to worry about my future.’
“You have a point there. Any luck with that?” you inquired.
Saiki shook his head.
“I guess that means we’ll be second years again.”
You didn’t keep track of how long time had been looping, and you found that you didn’t really care since you were already accustomed to the familiarity of your seemingly endless high school life. You were happy, even if it meant that the dreams you’ve been chasing for so long were slipping farther away from your grasp with every day that passed.
‘No, it’s about time I put an end to this.’
Saiki’s determined expression was embedded in your mind.
Your screams of disbelief were muffled by the pillow you held against your face.
You had vowed to yourself since you were young that you wouldn’t grow attached to anyone. After all these years, you had to go back on your word just when you were about to leave.
Now was not the time. Not here. Not with him.
Kokomi and Chiyo took it upon themselves to pay you a visit after you skipped school for five days without notice. The dark circles under your eyes and your sunken face visibly worried them.
“I’m in love with Saiki,” you murmured, gazing sullenly at your blue-haired friend. “I’m sorry.”
Kokomi’s face fell, but she showed no signs of surprise.
“I already knew that. It was obvious with the way you always look at him,” she lamented. Kokomi cupped your balled fists in her hands and looked at you wistfully. “He rejected me a few days ago, so you don’t have to worry about hurting my feelings. I think you two would look good together.”
You felt tears threatening to spill over your eyes. Whether it was from relief that Kokomi accepted you so easily or pain from your unfortunate situation, you didn’t know.
“I’m leaving Japan after we graduate,” you disclosed.
A dejected silence fell upon you three until Chiyo spoke up, “For how long?”
“An indefinite amount of time.”
“Are you ever coming back?”
“I don’t know.”
Their glum faces only worsened your mood.
“Why have you been avoiding me?”
You tensed at the accusing tone directed at you. Saiki’s piercing gaze was pointed at your shrinking figure.
No matter how much time had passed since the loss of his abilities, you doubted that you would ever get used to the sound of his voice resonating out loud, or the enchanting shade of his eyes, even if they looked dangerously menacing at the moment.
“I wasn’t avoiding you. I was just busy studying for exams and doing other stuff,” you explained weakly.
Saiki’s deadpan expression indicated that he didn’t believe your lie.
After a few minutes of squirming underneath his scrutinizing gaze, you gave in and told him your worries, “I’m leaving the country soon. I think we should stop talking to each other so that it won’t be so hard for us to say goodbye.”
You pushed past him. You didn’t know where your feet planned on dragging you, but you figured anywhere was fine so long as you could get away from him.
The familiar warmth of Saiki’s hand wrapped around your own, stopping you from taking another step away. You didn’t dare turn around as you felt your heart thumping wildly.
“I won’t ever ask this of anyone else, so I’m begging you not to push me away,” he pleaded. He placed your hand over his chest, giving away the heavy pulsing of his heartbeat.
You could never say no to him.
Memories of the last few years ran through your mind as you smiled at the nostalgia. You took one final glance at your high school building before turning your back on it, striding towards the exit.
You stopped at the sight of a familiar figure standing under the shade of a cherry blossom tree. Saiki must have known that you were staying much later after the graduation ceremony, all thanks to his restored powers.
‘Good grief. Were you really planning on leaving without saying goodbye?’ His voice resounded in your head.
You didn’t respond as you watched the wind blow through his hair, the sun illuminating the affectionate smile on his face, the violet obscured by his green glasses, and the petals dancing around the two of you as they fell to the ground. The timing was right. The mood was right. Everything was right.
He rubbed the back of your hand while you reached out to intertwine your fingers with his. The warmth that radiated off his skin felt like home.
He knew, and you knew that he did. After all, you could never hide your secrets from a psychic, no matter how hard you tried. However, you couldn’t bring yourself to tell him how you felt.
“Goodbye,” you pulled away from Saiki.
What was the point of confessing your feelings to someone you would never see again?
Paris, France was one of your destinations out of many. Most people romanticized the capital as the City of Love, but the only reason you were even there in the first place was to visit the Louvre, the world’s largest art museum.
Influenced by the art and the romantic ambience, you sketched out the scenery around you, deliberating how you could embody the city on paper. If you were to draw a picture of love, what would you envision?
Maybe, it would look like pink locks tousled by the spring breeze, or the reflection of your eyes searching for violet orbs through tinted green glass. It might have been the lingering warmth on the fingertips of someone who trusted you enough to share their deepest secret, or the gentle smile that was reserved only for you during the most intimate of moments.
Your love was constant and unchanging. You realized that now. No matter how much time had passed or how many countries you visited, you always found yourself thinking about home.
Ever since you were a young student in junior high, you had hated the thought of giving up on your dreams to pursue a flighty, insignificant relationship. Six years ago, you threw away your chance at love to focus on your aspirations. There was no point in thinking back on what might have been. You shouldn’t have.
You made a name for yourself through the many art competitions you joined, winning a few awards here and there. A while back, you finished your Bachelor's Degree in Illustration at a famous art school in New York. Things were coming together quite nicely.
Your high school days almost seemed like a lifetime ago. The memories that used to be the center of your universe, the laughter you shared with your friends, and a not so ordinary boy with psychic powers were at the back of your mind. Everyday life without the only person you've ever loved became the norm for you.
You recently got a job offer from a famous publishing company in Japan after you posted a short comic that blew up in popularity. The editor in chief sealed the deal with you after you sent him a promising draft for a manga you had planned out.
It had been years since you’ve been to the country, but your return and the nostalgic surroundings brought back old recollections that made you feel like you were a teenager again.
The chief took it upon himself to give you a tour around the company, showing you the work environment and the employees. He guided you through the different floor levels, offices and workrooms, and acquainted you with the higher-ups. But he had yet to introduce the editor you would be working with.
"There he is."
The chief led you towards the figure of a man who had his back turned to you. The pink tuft of hair on his head and the silly-looking antennae shaped into joysticks poking out of his scalp were noticeably familiar. But you couldn’t believe it.
He turned around, green-tinted eyes boring into yours with the same neutral expression you used to see every day. Even when you had anticipated who it was, you couldn’t help the breathless gasp that escaped your lips.
"This is Saiki Kusuo. He will be the editor in charge of overseeing your work,” the chief introduced to you.
You took the hand Saiki held out for you, shaking it courteously. His blank expression didn’t fade, but his eyes softened under your gaze. The warmth on his grip was just as comforting as you remembered, like the welcoming embrace for a loved one returning home.
Neither one of you let go.
"Well, since it's already after work hours, you guys should grab dinner and get to know each other. You'll be working closely for a while, after all," the chief suggested before leaving you and Saiki alone.
A hushed silence washed over both of you as the world disappeared before your sight. The image of a cherry blossom tree on a sunny spring day was evoked in your mind.
He sat next to you in a secluded booth of the café you used to frequent, away from prying eyes.
"What happened to majoring in Economics and Literature?" you asked.
Your body was angled in his direction while you engaged him in conversation. Despite the many years apart, you and Saiki had fallen back to the easygoing relationship you once shared.
'I finally had time to think about my future, and I realized that this is what I wanted.'
“You wanted to be a manga editor like your dad?” you prompted.
‘Not quite.’
Saiki was composed as usual as he turned to face you.
'I have a dream. After you accomplished your goals, we would find each other again and spend the rest of our lives together. And maybe we might even make a best-seller manga one day,’ he mused.
Your heart was beating rapidly in your chest. The words you couldn’t bring yourself to say on the day of your graduation poured out unthinkingly from your throat.
“I love you.”
He placed a hand on the back of your neck, closing the distance between you.
‘I know.’
Your lips crashed into his, moulding perfectly as they moved against one another. You gripped his shoulders, pulling him in as he snuck an arm around your waist. Your eyelids fluttered shut, relishing in the sweet sensation of his taste.
You only pulled away minutes after to catch your breath. His forehead leaned against yours, the tip of your noses barely skimming each other. The look of adoration in his eyes revealed that he felt the same way.
No matter how long he waited, your love for each other was unchanging.
#saiki x reader#saiki k x reader#saiki kusuo x reader#saiki#saiki k#saiki kusuo#the disaster of psi kusuo saiki#saiki kusuo no ψ nan#the disastrous life of saiki k.#saiki no psi nan
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MVA In Memoriam (4/5)
The Comprehensive Account of the Butchering of My Villain Academia
(Introduction and Part One, Episode 108: My Villain Academia) (Part Two, Episode 109: Revival Party) (Part Three, Episode 110: Sad Man's Parade)
Part Four, Episode 111: Origin: Shimura Tenko
Chapter 233 – Bright Future
• Twice clearly having arranged a Skeptic puppet to where its arm can be used as a pillow for Toga’s neck. A cute little character detail while also being kind of disturbing? Very on-brand for the League! A not-immediately-plot-crucial visual of a member of the League demonstrating obvious care for another member? The guillotine awaits!
• A little explanation about how clones’ physicality and memories work relative to the last time Twice saw the people the clones are based on. This is a very useful little nod of explanation to something that remained unclear from the dialogue of Mr. Clone-press last chapter. Twice’s quirk is pretty arcane in its ins and outs, frankly, and the clearer those details are, the fewer plot holes you’re leaving for later.
• The scene of Skeptic being right on the verge of confronting Twice. Skeptic has, oh, about five moments where he’s obviously a big tense neurotic who’s unpleasant to be around if things aren’t going his way, and the anime deleted or downplayed all but two of them. As ever, it’s obscenely damaging to the characterization of the MLA cast, who we have little enough time with as it is. Further, it was a particularly weird choice to make with Skeptic, who is as of this writing the only major MLA character who’ll emerge still free and active from the War Arc. Why shaft the characterization of the one of new characters who’s going to be getting the most attention out of any of them in the next arc, with yet more scenes yet to come after?[1]
• A full page’s-worth of Spinner’s rationalizations on targeting Trumpet and ordering the Twice doubles to do the same. This lays out the details on why targeting Trumpet stands to relieve some of the load on Shigaraki. It isn’t because Trumpet’s quirk makes the crowds more dangerous, though that is true. Spinner targets Trumpet because he’s seen enough to know that attacking the MLA’s leaders gets them crazy riled up; he knows that if he makes himself a threat to Trumpet, then all Trumpet’s followers’ attention will shift focus to Spinner, leaving Shigaraki with less to deal with. Spinner also knows that that is ludicrously dangerous to him personally, given his weak quirk, but he actively makes that choice anyway, because that’s how much he’s devoted himself to Shigaraki without (yet) quite articulating the nature and reasons for that devotion. Targeting Trumpet without any of that reasoning made for a perfectly sound tactical decision, but it missed the regard Spinner shows the unnamed mobs of the MLA, and it really missed the probable savage beatdown and even possible death that Spinner consciously chooses to risk for Shigaraki’s sake. Of course, a chunk of what the episode deleted is flashbacks to scenes the anime also cut, so they couldn’t figure into Anime!Spinner’s reasoning. This does not excuse yet more cuts to Spinner’s arc and characterization; it only adds to how badly the anime maimed him. Also, on a less salty but still confused note, deleting all the Twice clones from the beginning of the scene and just having Spinner running along a wall past mobs of people instead of laboriously fighting his way through the street to the van was really dumb. Why did all those MLA people just stand there and let him run by? Where did all the Twice clones that just helped save Spinner from a huge flurry of long-distance attacks disappear to? Come on.
• Trumpet’s thought that using Sevens Loud will draw every bit of strength from their warriors, but that it’s necessary. Setting aside that it looks far less necessary when there hasn’t been a crowd of Twice clones fighting Trumpet’s people this whole time, just Spinner by his lonesome, we still lost quite a bit to this cut. Firstly, a nuance on the trade-off Incite gives—that its stat-boost is temporary, and that it’s borrowing from the future to pay for the present, a stock that is limited and a bill that will come due when the effect wears off. Secondly, it’s another demonstration that the MLA leaders aren’t just thoughtlessly wasting their followers’ lives; they’re very consciously doing cost/benefit analysis on how much danger their people are in versus what stands to be gained by the potential exertion or outright deaths those people will suffer. It’s cold reasoning, yes, but that’s how the Liberation Army operates: not for the personal gain or lackadaisical ease of the people on top—Trumpet would just have been in the tower speaking through city-wide loudspeakers, if that were the case—but for the advancement of the group’s ideals. It also just grants Trumpet some interiority, but of course the anime can’t have that.
• The note in Trumpet’s meta-ability explanation that the more his voice causes the air to vibrate, the stronger Incite’s effect. This is—good god, it is literally the entire design mentality behind Sevens Loud! Sevens Loud purpose isn't to make his voice louder so more people can hear him (which I would think is the most logical assumption an anime-only person would make as to why he puts it on); it’s to make himself louder because being louder enhances the boost. It’s about the quality of the effect, not the quantity of targets. This is why Trumpet has the thought about how using Sevens Loud will drain the strength reserves of his people. There’d be no correlation there if Sevens Loud were only about boosting his range.
• When Spinner got porcupined in the anime, they did a close-up on his face, possibly to avoid the gore of showing the spines piercing through his forearm. That’s fine, but they also emphasized the reaction by having him lose his grip on the huge fuck-off knife he had clutched in his teeth. In the manga, sure, he yells in pain, but he doesn’t lose the knife. Indeed, he gets the guy off him by slashing at him with it—a shot the anime dropped. So Spinner doesn’t even get to keep displays of his pain tolerance, a trait he doubtless improved during those six weeks against Machia. Why does the anime hate Spinner so much, you guys? Why did it go out of its way to make him look lamer, when Dabi and Toga were out there getting anime-original flourishes to make them look cooler?
• Spinner’s thoughts, “When I get inspired to act, I don’t know what the heck I’m doing! I’m just a loser jumping on a bandwagon. Or at least that’s what it looks like.” A humorous bit of self-awareness from Spinner here. The anime got at the self-awareness. The humor, as we’ll see, not so much.
• Spinner’s thoughts, “Look at me. Look at me!! With all that prejudice in your eyes!” Hah hah, laughed BNHA the anime nervously, what prejudice are you talking about, Spinner? No idea what you could possibly be referring to there! This one’s particularly annoying because, while one might think that the anime was just dodging the heteromorphobia angle it eradicated all references to back at the beginning of the arc, the prejudice line isn’t even about heteromorphobia, not really. See, the Japanese line there literally translates to, “With those colored glasses!”—to see with colored glasses being a Japanese idiom for seeing something from a biased viewpoint. So aside from being a wordplay jab at Trumpet’s choice in eyewear, it’s also about Trumpet’s expressed view that Spinner, having been a shut-in with a weak quirk who decided to take his resentment out on the world, can’t possibly amount to anything much. So, what, did the people in charge of making those cuts think Trumpet was right? Why even keep the line where he disparages Spinner if you’re not going to let Spinner call it what it is? He’s not calling out fantasy racism there, anime! He’s calling out the bias against weak quirks that even the good guys in this world sometimes partake in! Possibly it’s because non-villains in the world[2] sometimes use reasoning that leads logically to quirk supremacism that the anime got gunshy with it, or it was more reluctance to give the villains—and the Too-Real Iguchi Shuuichi especially—moral ground for accusations against their society that get too close to real life. Whatever the motivation, it’s a bullshit cut.
• Shigaraki calling RD “Detnerat,” presumably because he neither knows RD’s real name nor cares to dignify him by using his code name. The anime, again, made neither the connection nor Shigaraki’s recognition explicit, so it lost the specificity and pettiness of that little snub.
• A little exchange between Giran and a Twice clone as they flee. It doesn’t give you much you wouldn’t assume just from seeing them flee, but it always feels more immediate and empathetic when the characters talk and you can see their expressions, instead of just a quick shot of them from behind as they run away in complete silence. Heck, running away in complete silence is actively out of character for Twice!
• Because the anime has some kind of aversion/restriction on showing hand-related violence, it radically changed how Shigaraki lost his fingers,[3] resulting in the loss of several important shots. To the best of my parsing, in the manga, when Re-Destro makes that first big jump to avoid Shigaraki’s decay wave, he comes back down specifically aiming for Shigaraki’s outstretched left hand, spread wide and flat on the ground. Shigaraki tries to evade (you can see the blur of his left arm in the panel where RD lands), but either RD does manage to clip the hand or he simply hits the ground with so much force that the sheer explosive burst of rock shreds Shigaraki’s hand and part of his coat sleeve. Being so much larger, RD then simply snags Shigaraki by the wrist before he can get out of range. It’s very fast, a burst of speed and violence, and very different (read: cooler) from Shigaraki flipping end over end in slow motion in a way that seemed to imply visually that he was thrown well out of RD’s grabbing range. As to the shots we lost? I counted three. First, Hana’s hand crumpling amidst all the flying debris. Second, that big dramatic panel of Shigaraki’s maimed hand ribboning blood into the air as the narration box finally drops Re-Destro’s identity and code name. Third, the shot of him catching Shigaraki, almost delicately, between one thumb and forefinger and delivering the, “Was it this hand that committed such evil acts?” line—a clear threat to what of that hand Shigaraki has remaining—as we find out what his meta-ability is. This is all hugely dramatic in the manga, because, of course, readers always assumed Shigaraki needed all five fingers to activate his quirk, and here Re-Destro nigh-effortlessly robs him of fully half his capacity to use it. It’s a shocking turn-around and instantly ups RD’s threat level by allowing him to permanently maim Shigaraki in a way that no one, hero or villain, has done before or since. Robbing Re-Destro of the immediacy of that seemingly devastating blow—inflicted within moments of meeting the real Shigaraki—did immeasurable damage to his credibility as an arc boss. The shot in the manga is also just arresting visually, with RD finally getting to properly loom over Shigaraki. Most of the shots up to this point have been framed such that, while RD is obviously bigger, he and Shigaraki have still been moving and fighting in a pretty level way. This is the first place where the viewer is situated so squarely behind Shigaraki that they can really feel how massive RD is in comparison. It’s certainly a more impressive visual than this mess—thanks, anime; thanks, whatever broadcasting standards forced overworked and uninspired animators to undertake a redraw of RD’s quirk reveal panel when every other member of the MLA brass had theirs carried over directly from the manga.
• A chapter-ending cliffhanger of Slidin’ Go helping direct traffic on the outskirts of Deika and the warning rumble as Gigantomachia approaches. Aside from being a nice little tension boost—Will Gigantomachia roll up just in time to see Re-Destro making a mess of Shigaraki? Who will he target? Will Shigaraki ever be able to win him over if he sees a scene like that?—it’s good foreshadowing for what the news reports will eventually be saying. Remember, the claim is that a bunch of villains lured Deika’s heroes away and then attacked the city while it was defenseless; that’s why we never see any of the MLA’s heroes involved with the fight once it starts. And now, here, we find out where they’ve been the whole time: making sure no outsiders get in who might be able to undermine that narrative.
Framing Shifts
• Once again had an MLA member using their Detnerat item say its name out loud, when it’s clear in the manga that they’re just thinking the names internally. Once again, it was kind of silly.
• When Spinner flashes back to watching Stain on TV and being inspired, the manga uses a shot of Stain’s face, snarling and defiant. The anime used—a shot of Stain from behind, only visible from the shoulders to the knees, hunched so that his lower back and ass were towards the camera. Bones… What exactly were you implying lit Spinner’s fire there? Or did you just not have the time or budget to go pull Stain’s reference sheets for drawing his face?
• A tone issue, but a major one: Spinner should be grinning, face alight with accusatory challenge, as he hurls his accusations of the MLA/Trumpet being the same bandwagon-jumping nobodies that he is. This is the moment in the manga where we see Spinner truly throw his hesitations and his doubts to the wind and embrace Shigaraki’s nihilistic fervor and the beauty, value and profundity of emptiness. So what if I’m empty? So what if he wants emptiness? Who cares about other peoples’ ideals if their ideals leave no room for me? It’s not a heroic triumph, but it’s a triumph all the same, and losing Spinner’s smile made the moment far too bitter.
• Meanwhile, in exactly the opposite problem, Shigaraki by this point is not smiling. In fact, he’s barely on his feet, swaying violently in place with accompanying sound effects. While his words are openly mocking, he seems to wholly lack the energy to back them up with his usual verve. The anime didn’t have him smiling, admittedly, but the whole time the ‘camera’ wasn’t directly on his face, his voice actor was reading the lines with an uneven, chuckling cadence that suggested Shigaraki was seconds away from breaking into howls of laughter. He was also, of course, impossibly clean, at a point at which his manga counterpart is muddy, bloody and tattered from the horrifically extended combat he’s been living for six weeks. It’s stuff like this that made it so impossible to take the Army or even Machia as much of a threat in the anime, when, other than the red cords on his hands being broken, Shigaraki looked absolutely no different than usual.
Additions
• Gave Spinner a tiny bit of new animation when he got mobbed by people hopped up on Incite. It was nice, but if they were going to give him a flourish, I’d rather it have come when he swipes Porcupine Dude off him with a combat knife. Or, you know, just kept the bit of him telling the Twices to attack and his reasoning on why.
• Cut inside briefly to show a ballerina girl dancing through a darkened apartment right before she sliced a neat circle out of the wall. I love it, A+, exactly the kind of expansion on the action of the manga I wanted to see. My only complaint is that her manga self looked more like Pearl from Steven Universe.[4] XD
• A quick new shot of RD when Shigaraki was hounding him about his feelings. His teeth were visibly gritted, the corners of his mouth pulled down. It stands out because there’s only one shot of RD there in the manga, and in it, he’s smiling, close-mouthed and calm. The anime copied said shot, smile and all, then cut away, and when it cut back, Re-Destro had a totally different expression on his face. Baffling. Anime!RD having a dour scowl everywhere manga!RD is smiling in a tight, controlled way was all over the fight scene, and it detracted from the sense of RD’s menace every time.
Chapter 234 – Destruction Sense
• The illustration(s) accompanying Re-Destro’s, “Let’s not judge people by their quirks,” line. The pictures are cute, but the real loss there was the note informing us that they’re excerpts from a children’s book published by Shoowaysha—Curious’s outfit—called Quirks and Us. That’s a very concrete illustration of the kinds of things the MLA is getting up to in the world, and an equally concrete thing an anime-only viewer lost. Of course, that viewer never even found out Curious was in publishing, so it wouldn’t have meant anything on that front, but there is one other thing I think is notable: the way that book implies that the only people explicitly pushing a “don’t judge other people by their quirks” message are the radical Liberationists. See, the rest of the story touches on the virtues of a nonjudgmental attitude here and there, but actually finding people willing to say it out loud is—unprecedented, I think. Deku comes across situations where he could say something like that multiple times and he never, ever does—not to Shouto, nor to Shinsou, nor to Eri, nor to the giant fox lady. And that’s not even touching on Shouji’s mask, or the discrimination Spinner faced, or the CRC “losing support” without being declared illegal. I think the manga itself is against judging people by their quirks, but it’s interesting that it doesn’t make its characters into mouthpieces to say as much. This is because its characters are thoroughly enmeshed in a society that very much does judge people by their quirks, regardless of whether or not it will say that doing so is bad or rude or prejudiced. Re-Destro and the MLA aren’t immune, of course—Re-Destro himself says that quirks are linked to personality—but they adhere to a different set of values than the larger society does. While Hero Society talks about quirks in terms of being heroic and/or useful versus villainous and/or useless, the MLA spectrums instead emphasize how capable a person’s quirk is of helping them exert their will and how ambitious the quirk’s bearer is in that exertion. That is, their ethics are less about morality and utility-to-society than they are about aspiration and utility-to-self.[5] Both worldviews have their pros and cons, but that, I think, is what the children’s book is getting at when it says not to “judge”—don’t assign an arbitrary moral value to a quirk; judge a person by their actions. And isn’t it interesting, that the only explicit verbal statement of that value comes from the leader of a radical cult descended from a famous insurrectionist quoting a children’s book published by a member of selfsame radical cult? The value is not ever stated by a member of the heroic cast, so are we to assume that the heroes don't actually believe it? Do people profess to believe it but everyone knows it’s only for courtesy’s sake, with only the MLA willing to breach that wall of “things we don’t talk about in polite society” to actually talk about it in anything other than platitudes? Obviously, you lose this entire line of discussion when the "don't judge people by their quirks" value is just never mentioned at all.
• The phrase, “In that case,” from RD’s, “You will never measure up to me.” It establishes continuity to what RD was saying before. He’s not taking breaks from talking while Shigaraki has flashbacks; the two are happening concurrently.
• RD’s, “Cracking apart…?” reaction to his Decayed fingertip, and the dripping blood from the injury. I’m not hugely fussed about the former, but I like the latter as indicative of what Re-Destro’s Stress powers actually do. That is to say, he isn’t covering himself in a thick shell of Stress power or something; his Stress powers make him physically larger, infusing his body and swelling his size. That’s why he bleeds when Shigaraki touches his fingertip. Admittedly, the size distinction was more obvious in the anime, where the audience watched RD’s shoulders inflate like balloons last episode, compared to the manga, where you don’t get in-between animation. Still, given that RD still has that wound even when he goes back down to normal size, and is still wearing bandages for his speech a week later,[6] it’d be nice to mark the severity of the wound with a bit of blood. Oddly, the anime did keep the wound for the crater scene, visible red slices opened in the flesh along the length of his finger, very obviously the sort of injury that would have bled upon being first sustained. Maybe RD ran afoul of whatever the studio mandate is on when Decay has a dust effect and when it leaves gore? (More of that later.)
• Shigaraki’s, “Mother!” for the first panel we see of her. It’s obvious enough who she probably is, but odd that we got a whole bunch of narration for Hana, and likewise an acknowledgment of his grandparents, but not even a single word for Nao.
• Very significantly drops the grandfather’s, “Eating yummy things helps make the sadness go away.” Grandpa’s not just randomly handing Tenko his favorite snack in that memory—he’s trying to treat some kind of grief or wrong without actually addressing the wrong, opting to just put a flavorful band-aid on it. That could be fine if it were something outside Grandpa’s control, but we’ve already gotten some early hints from Hana’s phrasing that things are not okay in the household, and thus the grandfather’s attempt to bribe Tenko with sweets is just as ominous a sign of what’s to come as the grandmother’s attempt to guilt him into not crying lest he make her cry too.
• A little shot of Shigaraki stirring in the rubble when RD answers the phone. It’s a nice demonstration of their size difference, especially comparing both of them to Machia, who we just saw tearing through buildings like the kaiju his theme music declares him to be.
Framing Shifts
• When Shigaraki narrates that Hana always took him by the hand when he got weepy, she actually does take his hand in the manga, her fingers wrapped around his, his clasped over hers. It emphasizes that this is what he can’t do anymore, simply hold hands with people, the innocence lost aspect, and it suggests the closeness he once had with his sister. In the anime, she reached out a hand but wound up taking him by the wrist instead, his hand splayed open beneath hers. This suggested, albeit very implicitly, that maybe that innocence was something he never had from the beginning; it also suggested less reciprocity in his relationship with Hana. Even though Tomura said in narration that their hands were joined, what we saw was that Hana just pulled him where she wanted him and he didn’t fight her on it, not that he held her hand in return. Alternatively, the anime could have been drawing a parallel to how her hand would eventually be gripping his wrist in a much different context (a more necrotic one, for starters) later in life, though if that's what they were going for, they could have stood to tweak the dialogue so it actually matched the onscreen action. (Credit to @robotlesbianjavert and @aysall respectively for these two theories!)
• Shigaraki still having his fingers when Re-Destro squeezed his hand made RD look like a real moron. I assume the intention was that he assumed he’d done enough damage—broken bones, torn ligaments, etc—to prevent Shigaraki from being able to move his hand in more than spastic twitches, but like, if all it takes is a hard enough spasmodic clench to dust you, you are playing much riskier games than the MLA is generally portrayed as favoring. (Not that the anime kept many of the scenes that demonstrated all the planning and prep that the MLA did as groundwork for their attack, as I have complained about at length.) In the same sequence, Anime!RD turned and bodily hurled Shigaraki away from him, while Manga!RD threw him a similar distance with nothing more than a flick of a finger. Anime, why you gotta make Re-Destro look so lame all the time?
Additions
• Just one episode prior, the anime managed to turn in an entirely reasonable assemblage of swiping and dodging between Shigaraki and Re-Destro while RD was rambling on about the Mother of Quirks. What the hell was the excuse for this episode’s ridiculous shot of Shigaraki literally running circles—big, broad circles—around RD multiple times in the time it took RD to finish one (1) thought? For heaven’s sake, if you don’t have the budget for flashy, just use slow motion or more flashback animation or something. I know there’s more leeway for long thoughts in manga, where the reader understands that thoughts are moving far faster than action, and that it can be hard to bridge that gap for anime, where motion is motion but voice acting still has to rattle its way to the end of a sentence. I understand that measures have to be taken to account for that. Still, I promise, something that just looks a bit padded is much preferable to something that looks outright dumb.
• I admit to having found huge Stress monster RD pulling out a teeeeeny-tiny cellphone very funny—even more so the distinct cracking sound it made when Skeptic reported in bad news and RD’s fingers tightened infinitesimally—but the manga suggests fairly strongly that RD’s just answering on some kind of earpiece or micro-receiver, the same kind of thing Ujiko hands out and that Skeptic is associated with on multiple occasions. It’d be nice if RD could have kept more of the jokes he actually makes, the ones that stem from his native good humor, rather than the anime making up new ones based entirely in the contrast of Re-Destro and the viewer’s expectations of Re-Destro.
Chapter 235 – Shimura Tenko: Origin
• The man at the door, whom Nao is apologizing to at the beginning of the Tenko flashback and the apparent reason Tenko got busted for playing hero. I don’t love the way deleting this obscured that Tenko, in some fashion, troubled someone to lead to Kotarou dragging him down the hall (the anime also dropped Kotarou’s subsequent line, “Causing trouble?!” that’s supposed to supplement his, “Playing hero again?”), but it’s not like the manga doesn’t imply that the same thing would happen for any hero-based rules infraction, regardless of whether it troubled strangers or not. No, the much, much funnier thing to me is how it just fuckin’ torpedoed the most obvious thing people point to when they posit that All For One gave Tenko Decay, kicking off the entire tragedy: the man at the door with the conspicuously shadowed face and the even more conspicuously AFO-like suit and dress shirt with the top button unfastened. Listen, I hate that theory and what it would do to the narrative of Shigaraki Tomura/Shimura Tenko as Hero Society’s long-overdue reckoning, the villain they can’t put down and the victim they can’t silence, so watching the anime summarily cut out the scene that really kicked the theory into overdrive was very validating! Conversely, I still can't deny that it's a plausible theory, so if it does turn out to be true, that means the anime shot itself in the foot on the most obvious bit of foreshadowing this side of AFO addressing Tenko by name when he finds him in the alley. The schadenfreude of that would also be very funny. Really, unlike every other cut this season, I regard this one as win-win for my personal experience with the anime. Incidentally, I was very prepared to complain about the anime dropping all the changes of clothes the Shimura family goes through over the course of the flashback—I regard the timelapse as one of the major points against the AFO Gave Tenko Decay theory, since it’s never taken a quirk bestowed by AFO multiple days, maybe even multiple weeks, to kick in before—but it turns out I’m a lot less bothered about them not taking the time to change the side characters’ clothes when the anime also deletes the dude at the door who is the only reason I care about clarity re: how much time the flashback covers! But just for the record, while they had more outfits than I was expecting them to, the family did go through fewer changes of clothes in the anime than in the manga.
• The full echo of the line about kids being sneaky and simple in favor of Narrator!Shigaraki just letting out this exhausted, rueful, “Ahhh, kids are…” I actually rather like it. It’s a clear reference back to the earlier line without having to restate the whole thing, and Uchiyama Kouki’s delivery is really excellent.
• Kotaro’s first slap of Tenko, the only one directly portrayed on-panel, and Mon-chan’s barking in response. On the one hand, I think there’s an argument to be made for the scene flowing a bit better like this—why wouldn’t Grandpa try to stop him from going for that second slap; why wouldn’t Nao pass Hana off to Grandma and do something instead of just standing there yelling for the entire scene? It makes a bit more sense if they’re hesitant to intervene because Kotarou has “only” grabbed at Tenko’s collar and they don’t yet know how that it’s going to escalate to naked physical violence in a way that it never has before. On the other hand, that first slap is so visceral and shocking. Nowhere else in the manga is domestic violence portrayed more sharply and directly, in greater detail or more cruelly generous panel space than in this moment. It’s in the difference in size between Kotarou and Tenko, the force behind the hit that’s enough to knock Tenko clear off his feet, the pages upon pages of gut-churning lead-up to this moment and what we know will be following soon after. Also too, it makes the family’s failure to help Tenko much worse that no one else acts when Kotarou pulls back for a second hit. The first one, you could almost excuse because no one saw it coming; the second throws those justifications out the window and spits on them afterward. Two hits are important—not only for what they tell Tenko in the moment about his family's inaction, but because two hits speak in ways one hit doesn't to how wildly uneven the power balance is in the house, that Nao and her parents could witness something like that and not only fail to intercede, but then take who knows how long to work up the courage to confront Kotarou afterwards. I understand very well the fear of showing this in a family TV timeslot—the violence is so much more real than any big fantasy beat-‘em-up could ever be—but it’s the kind of thing that really drives home what Tenko needed to be saved from even back then, a social issue that heroes as they currently exist were in no position to address. Far from demonstrating that heroes aren't at fault for what happened to Tenko, though, what this scene truly does is vividly illustrate the flaws in All Might's social contract, in which his power and smile seem to promise that he can save absolutely everyone, only to leave children like Tenko out in the cold with no explanation as to why. It's brutal because it has to be, and the anime shying away from depicting Kotarou's physical abuse undercut that.
Framing Shifts
• There was a bizarre, nonsensical change to the scene at the beginning of the chapter where RD is figuring out how Shigaraki survived/got back up after taking a Burden attack head-on. The manga’s explanation is that Shigaraki didn’t actually take a full force hit because he was Decaying it even as it was blowing him back. This is somewhat silly, given that even a reduced-strength Burden is still strong enough to put him through multiple buildings. It is, however, less silly than the anime’s take, in which Shigaraki touched Re-Destro rather than the corporealized Stress of Burden. How Re-Destro survived a full-fingered touch from Shigaraki’s completely uninjured right hand[7] went totally unexplained; the problem was then compounded by Re-Destro delivering manga-accurate lines about Burden not being an evadable attack despite “evasion” having nothing to do with Shigaraki’s actions. Anime!Shigaraki didn’t dodge the Burden attack any more than Manga!Shigaraki did; unlike Manga!Shigaraki, however, Anime!Shigaraki also did nothing to reduce the impact of the attack. So not only was how Shigaraki survived the Burden attack not explained, the change to the material also opened up the plot hole of how Re-Destro survived a direct touch attack that Shigaraki in the manga never lands.
• There was also an extremely weird decision made to give Tenko dark, gray-blue eyes, obviously reminiscent of Nana’s, and suggest that they became red at the same time as his hair was changing to white. But in the manga, other than the size, there’s no difference between young Tenko’s eyes and how Shigaraki’s eyes have always been drawn—an unshaded iris with a visible pupil and a relatively thick line delineating the iris from the white of the sclera. Tenko’s eyes never matched those of anyone else in his family, least of all his dark-eyed grandmother. His hair changed color because of a trauma response,[8] but his eyes were always red.
• Relocated Shigaraki’s first, “Little kids…are sneakier than you’d expect. And simpler,” to underscore Hana showing him Nana’s picture in the study, squarely centering the line on her. And like, yes, that line does get its bitter echo later when Hana panics in the face of her father’s fury and throws the blame onto Tenko—but that line isn’t just about her; it’s also about what Tenko wanted to hear from the other adults in his life. It didn’t matter that his father didn’t approve; if he could get at least one adult to say he could be a hero, to take his side, then he could feel vindicated. It’s a child’s sneaky, simple reasoning: if an adult’s words are absolute, you just have to get one (1) adult to agree with you. It’s asking Dad if you can do something you don’t think Mom will agree to, and then going to Mom with Dad’s permission held defensively in-hand. Laying the line over Hana obscures that it’s as much about Tenko’s craving for external validation as it is Hana’s (entirely understandable) deceitful streak.
• After half a season full of internal monologue being voiced aloud even when it made little sense to do so, the anime decided to render clearly talk-bubbled dialogue—Tenko’s chatting at Mon about how he feels like he could take on the world—as internal monologue instead. Who talks to their animals in their heads when they could be talking at them directly like pet owners the world over?
Additions
• Added a few extra stills of Kotarou rebuking Tenko and dragging him around. I don’t think they’re inaccurate to the situation, though I wonder if it really needed to be underlined two more times than the manga did. Maybe they were trying to make up in advance for deleting the first slap?
• Added a few new stills of Nana and child!Kotarou. They hurt my soul and I love them without reservation.
Chapter 236 – Shimura Tenko: Origin, Part 2
• Hana’s second apology. What needs to get across was communicated with her first apology, but I do think the second one adds some naturalism to the dialogue. It feels very normal for a child feeling extremely guilty to apologize multiple times, like the more times they say it, the more true/convincing it will become.
• A bit of Tenko’s internal monologue—thinking Hana’s name, and Mon’s, and that he can’t talk. The anime slipped some attempts at verbalizing “Mon” into the dialogue, and it was painfully obvious just from listening to him gag and choke that he was too horror-struck to get words out, in ways that would be a little harder to convey on the page. Also, he thinks again that he can’t talk just as Hana runs away, so it gets across regardless. No real complaints here.
• Some thoughts about how he’s itchy, which, given what his itch represents (or at least what he thinks it does), they probably should have kept for continuity’s sake.
• Tenko’s last, “Hana-chan!” just as he grabs for her. I can imagine it having just that little bit more desperate impact, especially given Sekine Arisa’s great delivery of the first “Hana-chan!” but his delivery of the first one was great—weeks later, I can still remember it clearly—so it’s not a snip I’m inclined to doomsay about.
• Hana’s verbalization as the Decay hits her. Given that they kept Mon-chan’s last whimper, it’s kind of inconsistent not to keep this. It’s grueling, sure, but no more so than the rest of the horror show shortly to follow.
• An echo of Nao’s defense of Kotarou’s anti-hero stance. Frankly, I think anime already over-indulges in echoing dialogue we’ve heard not ten minutes prior, so I don’t mind losing this—in the manga, the moments would have fallen in different chapters, so it makes more sense to squeeze in the little reminder, but that wasn’t necessary for the anime, in which the original moment and the callback happened barely more than five minutes apart. It was obvious what the mental image was meant to draw attention to, since Tomura was narrating about exactly what his grievance was, and the image was followed by the two equivalent moments with the grandparents. (Admittedly, it hurt that correlation a bit that Grandpa’s line about the ohagi being intended to make the sadness go away got cut, but the sentiment was pretty clear from the man’s expression of nervy, abashed guilt regardless.)
• The line of Decay that splits Nao’s eye, one of the more vividly horrific little grace notes in the chapter. It undercut the grotesquerie just the tiniest bit, but the scene’s grotesque as-is, so I can understand that slight edit for TV standards. The discrepancy between Decay-to-dust and Decay-to-gore, discussed below in Framing Shifts, was much more damaging.
• A shot of Kotarou just after he hits Tenko with the tree pruning shears in which he looks, briefly, incredibly distraught, like he’s just realized what a monster he’s become. The anime didn’t make the slightest of attempts to keep that spasm of horror, grief, and regret, and thus lost that last moment of sympathy for a man deeply traumatized by a heroic character’s actions. It’s my only complaint about Anime!Kotarou, who I was otherwise far more pleased with than I was afraid might be the case, but it’s a complaint I must register nonetheless.
• A bit of inarticulate yelling before Tenko screams, “You... Die!!” It helps get across Tenko’s rage overflowing, to have that wordless garble before he can actually wrap words around it. He was still having trouble talking, too, so it makes sense that his first vocalization would just be a long, incomprehensible screech. That said, with the music there to supplement the mood in a way the manga would lack, I don’t think the anime’s rendition of the scene suffered overmuch from its absence.
Framing Shifts
• The anime, of course, has always gone the dust route for Decay because Decay is a little too gruesome for family hour TV, and anyway, when Tomura gets as fast with Decay as he is in Deika, he really is just insta-dusting people, such that not even blood remains. But he wasn’t that fast or that thorough as a child, hence why it’s all so much gorier—and it needs to be, because it’s hard to imagine Hana freaking out like she does if all she sees is a pile of dust instead of, well, dog gobbets. (Also, if his family had gone the dust route, it would have been very hard to convince the audience that Tomura’s hands are his family hands and not fakes provided to AFO by Ujiko.) This obviously put the anime in a difficult spot, but apparently the decision they settled on was—to not decide? Everyone we saw in the active process of decaying decayed into dust as usual, but then once they were done decaying, once that transition from person to ruin was complete, there were all these heaps of gore everywhere. It was a very strange and distracting inconsistency that hurt the scene much more than any of the nearly invisible cuts, and I hope the blu-rays will change it.
• Added Grandpa catching Grandma as she staggered at the sight of things in the yard. Since his body language in the manga (the only non-Decayed shot of him in the sequence) has him leaned more forward, like he’s still halfway through running towards the kids, I thought this was a nice little touch on why he stopped, for reasons other than just the obvious.
---
Episode 111 was about half of a really strong episode. Most of my complaints about the Shimura Family flashback are very minor, and most of the ones that are less minor are still easy to overlook when the rest of the presentation was so strong. Unfortunately, the non-flashback half of the episode had as many problems as ever, and those aren't over yet.
Come back next time for Part Five, Episode 112: Origin: Shigaraki Tomura. Assuming my complaining about the finalized gutting of Spinner's arc doesn't get too out of hand—which it may; if so, I'll tack on one final part to wrap things up—I'll also be running down a quick overview of the Paranormal Liberation Front scenes in the Endeavor Agency arc and some various odds & ends.
FOOTNOTES
[1] Yes, I know the Skeptic Confronts Twice scene goes nowhere, but maybe, instead of deleting it, they could have patched it up by showing Skeptic turning away from the confrontation when the tower went down? You know, actually made an effort to improve on the material?
[2] Bakugou, of course, but also Inko, Kotarou, and, very prominently, even All Might. Deku circa MVA has an entire arc lying in wait for him about how much he’s internalized All Might’s paternalism re: having the strongest quirk.
[3] Indeed, as of the scene in the crater, he still hadn’t lost them at all! He had his prosthetic by the time of the speech, so I guess we’re meant to assume that Ujiko or some MLA doctor declared them past saving and amputated them. I hope I don’t need to tell you how unbelievably lame it is to have a shounen manga character sustain a permanent injury like that off-panel.
[4] It’s the pointy nose.
[5] That, at least, is the best way I’ve found to reconcile all the related-but-distinct values professed by the various members of the MLA brass, from Re-Destro’s focus on liberation and purpose, what exactly Trumpet chooses to cite when he’s talking about Spinner not “amounting” to anything much, Geten’s open extolling of quirk supremacy, and so on.
[6] In the first big double-page spread. Oddly, no bandaging is visible in the other panel that has a good shot of that hand, possibly because Horikoshi was more focused on drawing RD’s empty pant leg. The anime kept the obvious wound during the crater scene, but not the bandages during the speech.
[7] I assume, anyway, that Re-Destro only survives Shigaraki’s first touch because it’s a weaker Decay, coming as it does from only from two fingers rather than five.
[8] The fabled Marie Antoinette Syndrome. Never been scientifically documented as such (hair can whiten because of extreme stress, but not overnight) but it endures in fiction because it’s pleasingly dramatic. Trauma-based eye-color changes, not so much.
#my villain academia#boku no hero academia#my hero academia#bnha#bnha meta#my writing#stillness has salt
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Brothers reactions to a fem disaster bi MC who swoons over like every fem demon they see in the devildom?
Just got finished screaming over how much I LOOOOOVE THIS PROMPT. BI DISASTER YEEEEAAAAHHHH
Thank you for being the first to request something from me! 😭😭😭 I apologize in advance that these hcs aren't SUPER FOCUSED on the MC being a female themselves, but I tried my best with sneaking it in there when I could!
I've decided that along with MC, the brothers are also bisexual for the prompts too! You can be a mess together! <3 Sorry it took so long!
~
Lucifer
Oh. You seemed so interested in that girl who passed you by. You were smitten, he might say. Never mind it, he didn’t want to assume anything of it. Maybe you were just really fond of that girl's appearance.
The next girl he spotted you talking with, he was a bit concerned. You shouldn’t be off making friends with just ANY demons. They could be plotting to take your soul if you aren’t careful. Your palette seemed to be meshed, you were now talking to boyish women and feminine men. It was starting to come together for him now that you are, in fact, bisexual. A truly chaotic one, at that.
Over the next few weeks, he sees you flourish more and more with your obsession over women and men together. It’s not like you’ve forgotten about him, far from it. In fact, sometimes he listens to you rant about how beautiful this girl is at RAD, talking about her eyes or her lips. Other times he listens to you cry over how absolutely GORGEOUS this man is. He will never admit that he finds your taste in men and women to be quite similar to his. Almost exactly the same.
He listens to you sometimes talk to his brothers about how unrealistically, unreasonably cute, that girls are. You don't have nearly as much energy talking about men than you do women, but it's still there. He doesn’t really indulge you as much as he should, but he gives you enough input to invite you to keep ranting about BEAUTIFUL women and men.
Mammon
Same, dude. Same.
Mammon is a powerful bisexual, and you are the one who made him realize this(?!). He pretends he's not listening to you half the time, but he's hanging on your every word. When you two hang out, sometimes you push your D.D.D to his face to show you another model you've found on Devilgram. "His abs are SMOKIN' hot, Mammon, look!!" He has to agree. He's got a nice body. "Look at her soft face! She's SO unbelievably cute! And those curves, oof!”
He's watching you swoon and he can't believe it. You're both chaotic disasters, swooning over man and woman alike. You put much more life into your talks about women than you do men, and it worries him sometimes that he might not actually give him the time of day whenever he works up the courage. When you talk about those cute women, he does mostly still think about you. You have such beautiful eyes, and soft hair, when he's allowed to touch it. He wonders why you haven't seen it yourself.
At some point he let's it slip that he, himself, may or may not be bisexual, when you catch him scrolling through Devilgram of some of the models you've shown him in the past. The two of you spend hours on end, swooning over every male and female in sight.
Leviathan
You two are feral bisexuals. Especially fond of girls. Leviathan and you have both played those H-games. You know the ones. He catches you from time to time, listening to ASMR of girls patting your head or talking you through a rough patch in your life. He definitely knows when you're listening to lewd audio clips of women too.
He thinks for a while that you're a lesbian, and he's completely fine with that. It isn't until your attention abruptly SHIFTS when you find a SMOKIN' HOT anime boy that he realizes you are a disaster of a bisexual. Sometimes it's like a day and night shift with you. When you see girls at anime conventions you swoon uncontrollably. Gripping his arm and giving those compressed SCREECHES from the throat with shut lips. He can't help but think you're hyperbolic sometimes.
Deep down inside, he feels the exact same way. It's just too embarrassing to act like that though. But even though he feels that way, he watches you shuffling over to the cosplayers and otaku girls and asking for pictures. If you're lucky, you might even score a number from one of them! How dare you have better social skills than him? It's SOOO not fair??
He decides one of these days he'll take a page out of your book. He'll happily geek out about girls to you (especially if there's a Ruri-Chan cosplayer!?) and occasionally about the guys too. You both lean towards females anyway, and he's glad he's found someone just like him.
Satan
Oh. Girls? Guys? He's here, and he's listening.
He doesn't have any picture books, but the way the books describe some of the women? *chef's kiss* He loves it! He's watched you attempt to capture their beauty on paper (or tablet and laptop!) and smiles at your attempts. He calls them attempts because that's what you call them. "Nothing I do can truly capture the beauty that is any female that exists here." And he AGREES.
He finds your ridiculous chanting of GIRLS GIRLS GIRLS to be a riot. He joins in if it means pissing Lucifer off with the noise pollution. When you shift to guys, he's still as vocal as before. You probably aren't that great at drawing guys yet, but that's cool. He appreciates your enthusiasm. You catch him staring at you from time to time, and you wonder if he ever thinks you're as cute of a girl as the other ones you two fawn over.
Like a distorted clock, you talk about girls for at least two hours of his time, and then another hour about boys. He can't believe how much energy you put into loving women. He wonders if you're like Asmo, and just appreciate women a little bit too much. After all, the previous mention of chanting GIRLS GIRLS GIRLS is still fresh on his mind. You really are a messy bisexual, but you're his favorite messy bisexual, at least.
Asmodeus
OH HECK YEAH. YOU BOTH ARE A WRECK!
GIRLS. BOYS. GIRLS. BOYS. It's a never ending cycle with you two. It's like you're rabid animals, constantly going out to The Fall for the scoop on the next hottest guy to walk in. When you see a girl though, it's like you're straight out of a cartoon. You don't howl or whistle or anything of the sort that may be unsightly or rude but you ARE WATCHING. RESPECTFULLY.
You and Asmo are unashamed when it comes to flirting with men and women alike. You share tips that have worked in the past for each other, and having the Avatar of Lust give you pointers is a nice bonus overall. Asmo thinks for a while that you are a normal bisexual, but he's proven wrong when you find a group of beautiful women, who you hyper focus on for the next few weeks. He's honestly impressed.
It's like your attraction to men has almost disappeared, and he worries that perhaps you don't love him more than any woman you run across in the Devildom anymore. Your attention to men is still there with passing comments of "yeah he's really cute" but you're RIGHT BACK to the topic of GIRLS. he can't blame you. Women are QUEENS, just like you're an absolute QUEEN to him. He's more than happy to indulge some lewd talk about women, and you both spend hours doing exactly that most nights.
Beelzebub
Oh, that's cool. Someone else in this house likes both men and women. He's glad you're comfortable sharing so much with him. Usually when you do go for jogs in the morning, he watches you at his side while he listens to you. There's apparently this blonde woman with dark skin and she looks absolutely DIVINE. His brain focuses on imagining a pretzel with salt sprinkled over it, and he drools. He likes that thought, very much.
It's when you see said jogger does he truly realize your fixation on women is something to be feared. You're practically floating when she jogs by, almost wanting to go after her. Beel stops you, and asks if you're okay, worried that you might trip over your own feet if you swoon any harder. He thinks its cute. You start to dress like this jogging woman, wearing her color scheme in hopes that she'll notice you. Maybe he'll try to help and play wingman for you.
He doesn't open up about it at first, but eventually he does finally speak up when you bring up a man you see at the gym with him from time to time. He blushes a bit because he knows immediately who you're talking about. You like that guy, and Beel really likes him too. When you two see him at the gym, you both swoon a bit too much. While spotting Beel one time, he passed by and Beel nearly dropped his weights on his chest. This caused a bit of attention your way and flustered, you helped Beel set the weights back up and make sure he was okay. That wasn't the first or last time an accident happened at the gym either.
At the Fangol games, it's even worse, somehow. You sit as close as possible to the field, and halftime is your FAVORITE time. All those cute cheerleaders? Cheering for their teams? You forget in all the glory that is the ABSOLUTE BEAUTY OF WOMEN that you're supposed to be rooting for Beel. You spend the rest of the game reimagining the routines that were performed, and Beel is right there admiring them too. Quietly, at least. You're a bit too enthusiastic about your love for women, and Beel thinks you're cheering louder for them than you are for him when he's playing. He doesn't mind it too much though. He'd probably be the same way, provided he let loose a little more.
Belphegor
He doesn't bother with you. It's like you talk a mile a minute, only interested in girls for the most part. Occasionally you'll talk about a hot guy, and well, he's listening but... It's sort of hard for him to fall asleep with all your rambling about women. With such detail, it's like you're trying to give him material to imagine while he sleeps.
Belphie tries his hardest not to tell you to quiet down sometimes. He's forced to come to RAD, he's stuck by your side, mostly because your taste in men and women are quite similar to his. He's been sorely lacking on the cute girls and guys here at RAD, but he can count on you to provide eye candy for him. Not that he's going to act on it. Most of the time, he's too busy trying to block out your constant rambling. He notices it's mostly about women.
He thinks you're insecure at first, trying to appeal to him, presumably a straight guy, while appearing interested in men to seem straight too. He let's it be known for your comfort, if you like girls more than guys, then it's fine. He's not one to care or judge others on their interest. An anarchist at heart, and your chaotic bisexuality freak-outs are what he lives for. If you were more quiet about it, he would find it easier to fall asleep to. He manages to do that a few times.
Let's it slip while talking about a dream he had that he's interested in guys too. Maybe a little more than you are, though. 50/50 at best. He doesn't really encourage you to talk more about the girls you absolutely DROOL over, but whenever you two are out and you spot a woman, he's always side eyeing you and telling you to wipe your mouth. He sometimes makes a show of it, teasing you by panting like a dog, or telling you to heel. It's all in fun though, and he lets up before it gets too embarrassing.
#om!#obey me#obey me shall we date#obey me swd#obey me lucifer#obey me mammon#obey me leviathan#obey me satan#obey me asmodeus#obey me beelzebub#obey me belphgor
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Sketchbooks
MAIN MASTERLIST
Steve Rogers x Reader
Word Count: 1,300ish
Summary: You and Steve won’t part with your sketchbooks, or your feelings.
You loved to sketch. You wouldn’t call yourself the greatest artist in the world, but you definitely enjoyed some time with a sketchbook and pencil. It helped you filter through your thoughts and emotions, especially as an Avenger. After tough missions, you could usually be found someplace in the Tower, curled up in a blanket, sketching. Sketching also helped you to fall more in love with your captain, Steve Rogers.
The sketch book that you were currently working in was filled with just sketches of Steve. His large calloused hands, the sparkle in his eyes, his mouth when he was laughing. The concern on his face with something wasn’t right, the look that he got when he was working on his own sketches. Both Natasha and Tony had teased you about your sketchbook dedicated to Steve and your undying love for him.
What you didn’t know though, was that they did the same to Steve. He also had a sketchbook full of sketches of just you. Your smile, the way your eyes shined when you made someone else happy. Your hands, that could be so gentle and yet could also snap someone’s neck when they needed to. The way you curled up in the couch on movie night. Every part of you he sketched, had him falling more and more in love with you.
But the both of you were oblivious to the other’s feelings. You two were friends, yes, and never had a hard time speaking to each other or spending time together. But neither of you were willing to ask the other out, out of fear of denial and losing a friend. So you two hung out, talked about anything and everything, including art, and never did anything about your growing feelings. And that annoyed Natasha and Tony.
“You know instead of drawing Capsicle’s lips,” Tony said one day, after finding you in a corner of his lab, sketching Steve yet again. “You could just run up and kiss him.”
“Tony,” Y/N whined. “You know why I can’t do that.”
“No. I know your excuse as to why you can’t do that. Why you can’t do it is not an actual fact.”
“You and Capsicle kill me,” Tony shook his head.
~~~
“You know,” Nat said, peeking over Steve’s shoulder to look at the sketch of your hands he was currently working on, “I’m sure Y/N wouldn’t mind if you asked her to actually model for a sketch. It might get you to finally confess those feelings you have for her.”
“I don’t want to make her uncomfortable,” Steve excused, still working on his drawing. “About her modeling for me or my feelings.”
“So you just plan to harbor feelings for her forever? Never acting on them.”
“Maybe, one day—“
“Maybe?” Nat scoffed. “You two lovebirds are the worst.”
~~~
“I think I have an idea, Red,” Tony said as he burst into the gym where Natasha was training alone.
“Oh great,” Nat muttered.
“I think I know how we can get Y/N and Steve to confess their feelings!”
Nat stopped what she was doing and faced her friend. “Okay, I’m listening.”
“We switch the sketchbooks! When they aren’t here or not looking, we switch them. Then they’ll see the sketches and return them, they’ll finally have to talk about their feelings!”
“That’s actually not a terrible idea, Stark. When do you think we could grab the books?”
“Both of them just left on a mission with Barton. They’ll be back in a few days. We can switch them tonight.”
~~~
The mission went better than they had hoped, which was wonderful. But that still didn’t mean they weren’t completely exhausted. You felt the hunger for the warmth of your bed as you made your way down the ramp.
“Hey, Y/N!” Steve called behind you. You stopped and waited for him to catch up. “I just wanted to say that you did an awesome job out there. I was very impressed.”
“Thanks,” you replied, a tiny blush rising onto your cheeks. The two of you began heading to the residential part of the compound. “You going straight to bed?”
“I’m not too tired right now. I think I’ll do some sketching until I fall asleep.”
“That sounds nice.” You nodded. “I’m exhausted, but I’m afraid my mind won’t shut off and my hand won’t stop tingling until I do a few sketches.”
Steve let out a small laugh as you neared your room. “Well, don’t stay up too late.”
“Same to you. Goodnight, Steve.”
“Goodnight, Y/N.”
You smiled at each other before entering your separate bedrooms. You quickly showered, got into your favorite pjs, and curled up with a pencil and sketchbook on your window seat. As you flipped through the notebook to find a blank page, you realized that the sketches were all of you. That couldn’t be right. You flipped through them again, this time more slowly. They were all gorgeous, and so very detailed. And each and everyone was you.
You soon came to the conclusion that this had to be Steve’s and that, somehow, the two of you had switched sketchbooks. Which was almost impossible, because you never let Steve have a chance at looking at yours and Steve did the same with you. Which meant that if you and his, then he had—
Your spiraling thoughts were halted by a gentle, yet quick, few knocks on the door. You slowly got up, closing the sketchbook yet keeping it close, and moved towards the door. Opening it, you saw a recently showered Steve, with a sketchbook in hand.
“I think this is yours,” Steve said, handing the book to you. He looked as embarrassed as you felt.
“And I believe this one’s yours,” you replied, handing his over as you took yours. “I’m sorry, but I couldn’t help but look through it. They’re all—“
“Of you. Just as yours is all of me. Why?”
“I— cause…” You looked down with a deep sigh. Now or never, you guessed. “Cause I love you,” you whispered, still looking down.
“What?”
You clenched your eyes shut. “I love you,” you said a bit louder. You kept your eyes shut, missing the shocked look on Steve’s face, and waited a moment before continuing. “I have for a long time. And instead running the risk of losing you and sharing my feelings, I’ve just drawn them…”
“I love you too.” Your eyes went wide as your head snapped up. When had Steve moved closer to you? “That’s why I draw you. I love you.” He chuckled. “I can’t believe they were right.”
“Who?”
“Tony and Natasha.”
“They bugged you too?”
“All the time.”
“Same… well, what do we do now?”
“I take you out on a proper date. Say, Friday?”
You couldn’t stop the grin that seemed to cover your face as you answered, “Sounds perfect.”
“Well, I guess there’s one more thing I need to do tonight.”
“Really? What is it?”
“This.”
Steve cupped your cheeks and quickly brought his lips to yours, for a soft, loving kissing. Your hands came up to hold his wrists in place. You guys stayed like that for a while, not wanting to part from each other just yet. When you finally parted, you both had goofy grins on your faces.
“Good night, Y/N.” Steve gave your lips one last peck before backing off.
“Good night, Steve.”
In the lab, at the same time, the two master minds were watching the security cameras.
“Do you think we can get them to name their kids after us?” Tony asked. “Wouldn’t want all our hard work to go to waste.”
#steve rogers x reader#captain america x reader#the avengers x reader#avengers x reader#marvel imagine#steve rogers imagine
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Don’t Hold Me -18- Carter Hart
As always, all previous parts are linked in my master list!
A/N: Sooo we get to see a little bit from both Kora and Carter in this chapter, which I think is important. But honestly still just a bunch of feelings and a little bit of fluff from Carter. So enjoy!
Your nails bit into the skin of your palms as you walked through campus. He was gone, the last away game of the season was tonight. He was away from Philly, which meant Zachary couldn’t touch him. But that didn’t change the fact that Zachary was still in Philly, and was just waiting.
You almost couldn’t make it into your dorm fast enough. You wanted to be out of sight and back in your little room. It felt safe there.
“How did your final go today?” Kora asked once you finally got into the room and sat in front of the TV.
Shrugging, you took a handful of popcorn from the bowl between you two, “Fine I guess?”
“I think Professor Martin tried to kill all of us with his final today,” Kora stated, “God I can’t wait for summer. None of this bullshit. Plus, Ethan said he’d come visit.”
You couldn’t help but let out a little laugh. Never did you expect that your roommate and brother would become a thing, but at the same time you were almost happy that it was them. They worked so well together.
“Just as long as I don’t have to listen to all of the gorey details,” You joked.
She smiled and nudged you with her shoulder, “Do you know what you’re going to do this summer?”
That feeling set back in again. Your shoulders seemed to sag with the weight that was now baring down on them. So much could happen between now and the time that the season would really end. Even if they didn’t make it through the first round, and the season ended in a week. You didn’t know where you’d stand when it was all over...or if you’d even be standing at all.
You wondered when Zachary would show himself again. When he would come back to tell you exactly what he wanted you to do. How he wanted you to play. Or maybe the proper way of putting it would be how he wanted to use you for his game. You knew he was watching, waiting for the right moment.
You weren’t sure you’d be able to find a way out of it this time. You were out of moves, out of ideas. There would be no more escaping. In so many ways, he already won. He had you exactly where he wanted you, and there was nothing else to be done. All you could do was play along.
“I don’t know yet,” You told her, “I’ll figure it out somehow.”
She glanced over at you. She wondered if you knew how truly awful you looked. The circles under your eyes were nearly black. Sure you always seemed to have them, but she’d never seen them this bad before. You jumped at every little sound. Deep down, Kora knew this was how you were right after everything happened. This was how you were when she’d first met you. She remembered the way you practically hid behind Travis, who’d come just to make sure everything went smoothly.
Kora knew you wouldn’t tell her what was going on. You wouldn’t tell anyone. If she didn’t know any better she would’ve swore you had a martyr complex. But this time it seemed to be destroying you, whatever it was.
“Well...not that I would make the top of the list,” Kora stated, “But, my place is always open. You know, if you want to get away from all of the meathead hockey players for a bit.”
“Thank you.”
Your voice was so small as you watched the boys take the ice. Travis and Nolan were laughing at one another, across the ice Carter was stretching before going into the net. Your chest squeezed again. Would you be able to watch him in person again? Would he even want you anywhere near him once all of this was over?
“I don’t know what’s going on...but we can help you,” Kora stated, “Me, Travis, Nolan, Ethan...and Carter. We can help, you just have to tell us.”
You forced down the lump in your throat. All you could hear was Zachary’s threat against Kora. You knew he wasn’t bluffing. You knew he would do anything he could, even if that meant hurting innocent people to get to you. If Kora was in his way, he would deal with her. He’d deal with anyone.
“Nothing’s wrong. I’m okay,” You swore, “Just haven’t had a lot of time to sleep.”
“Y/N-”
“The game is starting.”
Reluctantly, Kora settled back into the bed and didn’t say another word. She knew you wouldn’t talk now that the game started and you could use it as an excuse. Kora always gave you space, she knew you needed it. But this time she was almost too afraid to give it to you. Had you let the boys see how bad you were? Or were you somehow finding a way to hide it from them too?
You tried to put up a better front after that. You took special care to put on concealer to make yourself look better before Kora woke up. Anything you could do to convince her that you were just fine, you did. All you could think about was keeping her safe from Zachary...keeping all of them safe from him.
Around Carter, you tried to act normal. You tried to make it seem like nothing changed, like you were still just as carelessly in love with him as you had been just weeks ago. Every time you closed your eyes you could almost see all of the things you wished you could have with him. The future that you knew you wouldn’t get was almost clear as day. It hurt.
The pencil in your hand flew across the page again as you tried to get the shading on Carter’s face right. He always felt some sort of pride when you asked if you could draw him, but he didn’t know that this time was to make sure you could remember him how no one else got to see him.
His hair was a little extra fluffy, his eyes were brighter as he smiled at you. He had on a sweatshirt that he’d thrown on just minutes beforehand, because you joked that you weren’t going to use him as a nude model. You loved how at ease he seemed. You wished people got to see this side of him more, rather than the side that the media saw during interviews.
He could be so quiet, so shy and reserved, but he could also be the loudest one in the room. He could be the one who would tell jokes that would make everyone laugh for hours. Or just be the one. You knew that you would never meet another person quite like him. There would only ever be one Carter.
“You’re cute when you chew on your lip like that,” He stated, “All focused and shit.”
You fought back a blush, “Shut up. You’re meant to be staying still.”
“I am still,” He countered, “I’m just trying to compliment my gorgeous girlfriend while she paints me like one of those french girls.”
“We aren’t doing a nude session. Therefore, you are not one of the french girls.”
He laughed, so loudly and beautifully. You wondered if you’d feel the pain in your chest long after he was gone. How long would you still look back on days like this and wish things could’ve been different? Would he remember you as fondly as you knew you’d remember him?
“I’m thinking after this next game, you and I should do something,” He told you, “Go get some takeout, rent a movie, maybe drink some cheap wine. Just be regular twentysomethings.”
You smiled softly at the thought of it. You wished for nothing more than things like that. You wanted a whole life of simple nights with him. But you would settle for one of two more.
“You’re gonna make me drink cheap wine when you can buy the good stuff?” You joked.
“Baby, you like Barefoot. You stick your nose up at the good stuff.”
You rolled your eyes and tried not to laugh. He was right of course. In true broke college student fashion, you would drink box wine and the cheapest stuff you could find and were quite happy with it too.
It wasn’t unusual that you and Kora would have a couple of bottles on the weekend. Especially mid season when the guys were on a road trip. Carter secretly liked how cuddly wine made you. After a couple of glasses all you wanted to do was snuggle up next to him with a big blanket. You would always pout when he tried to get up.
“I love you,” He said softly, not taking his eyes away from you.
You had that feeling in your chest again. The tightness seemed to take over once more, “I love you too.”
If only you could tell him just how much you loved him. How much you were willing to do to keep him and everyone else out of the line of fire. How much you were going to give up so that he could have everything he deserved in life.
“Kora said you killed your exams so far.”
You shrugged, “I guess?”
“C’mon, that’s something worth celebrating, Y/N.”
You felt the need to crawl up into a ball and hide. Because you weren’t worth celebrating. You didn’t feel like doing anything special. Not while Zachary was just one text away from probably ruining everything. How could you celebrate when that was hanging over your head.
“You look exhausted. Are you sure you’re sleeping?” Carter asked.
“It’s finals week, you don’t sleep during finals week,” You told him, “Not that you would know about that, Mr. All-Star.”
“I’m not an All-Star yet babe.”
You knew he was a little disappointed that he didn’t make it this season, but also enjoyed the short break that he was able to get. You spent all of it with him, locked in the apartment together. Both of you enjoyed that time more than you’d expected. You remembered him saying he wished that it could always be like that.
“Soon,” You promised him, “Before too long they won’t be able to keep you away.”
He smiled, knowing you fully believed it. You didn’t seem as bad today. To Carter, you seemed a little lighter. He tried asking Travis if this was normal around finals, if you’d always been quite this bad, but even Travis was at a loss. You were pulling away whenever one of them tried to talk to you about it. So Carter tried not to let it bother him too much. You were still here with him, that had to mean something.
So until you told him that you didn’t want him around anymore, Carter was planning on holding you as closely as he could. He was almost afraid of what would happen, like you might just slip away into nothing.
Carter hadn’t felt this deeply for someone before. He was pretty sure that it scared him just as much as it scared you. But one thing Carter knew for certain was that you managed to make his life better by being in it. You opened his eyes to a different side of life. He didn’t always have to be all about hockey. There were some things that were just more important in life. Not to mention the fact that life was too short to not appreciate them.
“Y/N?” He questioned, looking down at you.
You hummed, somehow already half asleep in his arms. Carter smiled, knowing that you somehow always felt safe enough to fall asleep with him. He wished she could always feel that safe. Not just with her small circle of friends, but with anyone.
“I love you,” He whispered softly, “So much.”
#carter hart imagine#Carter hart imagines#Carter hart#Carter hart fanfic#Carter hart fanfiction#nhl imagines#nhl imagine#nhl fanfiction#nhl fanfic#hockey imagine#hockey imagines#Hockey Fanfiction#hockey fanfic#Philly flyers imagine#Philly flyers imagines#Philly Flyers#flyers#nicolewritesthings
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A Moth to a Flame - Chapter Two
One month later
Sasha joylessly toyed with the Music Box, opening its lid like a yawning mouth.
Who’d have thunk it? She wondered to herself. This tacky little thing could cause so much calamity?
How ludicrously out of place she looked curled up on King Andrias’ enormous throne, almost like the little girl playing pretend in the driver’s seat of her parents’ car. You’d be forgiven for not knowing she’d just led the swiftest, easiest toppling of a government in this world’s history.
Big blue dummy locked up? Check. The city’s army surrendered? Check. Their toad army less than an hour away? Check. Dimension-skipping Macguffin firmly in their position? Double Check.
Not a bad day’s work for a 13-year-old.
Marcy’s oversized sparrow was tethered to the armrest by his leg. A prize she’d taken for herself so she could cruise around her new kingdom in style. She saw to it he wasn’t under any duress, and the fact he was neck deep in an industrial sized bag of bird feed told her he was plenty comfortable.
Sasha managed a tiny smile as she reached out to run her fingers through the thickness of his coat. She dunked her hand in the bag and offered him an open palm of seeds; he eyed for a moment or two before gingerly pecking at the mound.
Thank Frog no one was around to hear the ‘d’aww’ escape her lips.
Her grandmother was the one she had to thank for her secret admiration of birds. Old lady had been a birdwatcher who ‘treated’ her to regular weekend trips into the forest when she was younger. This was long before her discovery of malls and arcades. Sasha wouldn’t dare admit it to even herself back then, but the ones they spotted together on those dewy spring mornings were beautiful to behold in their natural habitat.
Herons may now be forever ruined for her, but Joe—she thought that was his name—was a mighty impressive specimen. Poor guy somehow found the strength to carry all seven of them to Newtopia, only to nosedive into the moat at the end of the flight.
Definitely had nothing to do with her asking Marcy if she could take the reins in the last stretch. She and Anne were kind enough not to draw attention to it, same as they did the day at summer camp when they discovered her crying into her pillow. They were awesome enough to go along with her story that it was only allergies. She knew she had a true pair of girlfriends that morning.
Thinking about them only soured her mood afresh. She sprinkled the rest of the feed back into the bag and slumped against the backrest, arms petulantly crossed.
Here she was in the crowning moment of her young life and she couldn’t have been more miserable.
Maybe because her friends should have been here to share in this, but no, they had to go and act all noble. What else should she have expected? She always was the only one in the group with the guts. Anne had to be dragged kicking and screaming to ditch school and join her and Marcy in celebrating her birthday. Was it any wonder she had to keep taking control of the situation?
More likely... it was because deep down she knew she didn’t really want this. She certainly believed she did after they dropped that gloryhound newt general down a waterfall and when they successfully rallied the Toad Lords after retrieving Barrel’s Warhammer. Things only started getting complicated when they needed free tickets into Newtopia in the form of her friends.
She hadn’t counted on realising just how much she missed her clumsy, klutzy Marcy. Neither how effectively she and Anne were still able to work together as a team in spite of all the unpleasantness that had transpired between them during their time here, of which there was plenty. The fact that Anne actively encouraged her in taking down that molten toad monster was the rancid cherry atop the sludge sundae. For a while back there, it looked like they might really turn a corner and start afresh. All three of them could have gone home like none of this ever happened. Except by then it was already too late.
What recourse did she have when the Plantars invited them for the world’s most awkward dinner party or when they brought the house down at the Battle of the Bands? Tell Grime and all the toads who’d invested their manpower and futures in her that sorry, she was getting cold feet? There was only one grizzly way that would end both for her and Grime and the best scenario she could imagine involved heads on pikes.
... It didn’t matter anymore. Her friends had picked their path, she’d picked hers. As her mom always said, ‘You make your bed, you lie in it’. Funny how in her short life, she’d heard that line far too many times already.
Once she figured out how the Box worked, she’d send both Anne and Marcy on their merry way and they’d never have to see each other ever again.
Everyone would get what they want.
Good thing then she’d sent her soldiers to ransack Marcy’s room for all her research about Anne’s fateful birthday gift. Girl was a pack rat. She kept notes for every exam and project they were assigned back home. The less said about her laptop jammed with files of anime fanfiction and theories the better.
Plus, it was a good way to try and distract herself.
They came back into the throne room hauling burlap sacks full of parchments and emptied their contents at Sasha’s feet.
Daaang, girl, you've been in the zone.
She scattered them over her lap and the ample free space on the seat. They actually weren’t that hard to follow; colour coordinated with plenty of cutesy kawaii diagrams. Trademark Marbles.
Apparently, it worked a lot like those puzzle boxes Marcy got as gifts from relatives in Hong Kong. All it took was knowing the right sequence of buttons and zip! You can go wherever you want in the cosmos. Just a matter of finding the code for Earth.
‘I’m done listening to you!
I’m done trusting you!’
Sasha scowled, trying to push the thoughts to the back of her mind where they belonged. She shuffled through a couple more pages until she found the one titled in glittery green and blue lettering, ‘HOME’.
Bingo.
‘You’re a horrible person!’
Ignore. Ignore.
Now all she had to do was jot it down on her palm and—
‘AND I AM DONE. BEING. FRIENDS WITH YOU!!’
She stopped. Her shoulders drooped. Then she just threw the page down on the floor and sunk into her seat further than she thought physically possible.
She normally didn’t consider herself that thin skinned a person, but man, that one hurt.
Traces of bitter tears creeped into her eyes.
What am I even doing anymore?
The sound of footsteps on crumpling paper and someone clearing their throat snapped her out of her self-pitying torpor. She fluttered her eyes dry to see Grime standing there awkwardly among the discarded parchments.
The diminutive, one-eyed former Toad Lord was hiding something behind his back. He actually looked pretty embarrassed about it too, which for a battle hardened war vet like Grime was actually kinda adorable in Sasha’s eyes.
“I, uhh, got you something,” he said, whipping out a long rectangular present wrapped in green paper and topped with a luscious red bow. “Had it made especially for this day.”
Now if there was one thing Sasha Waybright couldn’t say no to, it was a gift, especially from a trusted friend. They were the ultimate distraction from the blues and she couldn’t have been sitting upright and tearing into this one any quicker.
“Whaaat? Grimesy, you didn’t!” What she had pulled from the ravaged packaging wielded aloft her head made her gasp. “How’d you know I wanted to duel wield?!”
It was a brand new heron sword. An exquisite green second shortsword that would compliment Ol’ Pink perfectly.
She stared proudly into the smooth steel surface, admiring the craftsmanship. When she noticed the girl staring right back at her, however, her smirk vanished in an instant. The captain of the cheerleaders, the scarred swordswoman, the conqueror of Newtopia, whatever angle she looked at it, she didn’t like what she saw. Unbelievable as it may sound, even the joy of an awesome gift like this was not enough to make everything better.
“What’s the matter? You don’t like it? Oh dang it!” Grime slammed his forehead. “I didn’t get a gift receipt!”
“No no, it’s just...” Sasha weighed the blade against her ungloved palm. Talking about these kinds of things was never easy for her. “What if Anne’s right? What if I am a horrible person?”
Grime popped up like a whack-a-mole behind the armrest. “Who cares what she thinks?” he scoffed. “You and I are in charge now, and we get to do whatever we want!”
“That’s the thing... I’m not sure what I want anymore,” she admitted wearily.
For all his years of training at the finest academies, his brutal combat in the colosseum and tactical expertise earned through a lifetime of military service as his forebears before him, this one had Grime stumped. Needless to say, talking about one’s emotions wasn't exactly encouraged during their upbringing in toad culture, so naturally it wasn’t one of his strong suits. Just one of the many things he and Sasha had in common.
“Huh.”
Still, he was a pretty fast thinker and came up with a fairly good idea on the spot.
“Why don’t you help me redecorate this place?” he suggested, resting his hand on her shoulder. “Take your mind off it. Cuz this right here...” He gestured to the cluttered mess in which she’d surrounded herself. “This is definitely not—I’m sorry, can I help you?!”
Both of them turned their heads when it became impossible to ignore Joe’s cone-shaped beak lightly nipping at Grime’s cheek.
“He probably thinks your warts are seeds.”
“For the love of—I knew he was eyeing me up on the ride here! There! Get lost!” Grime scooped up a fistful of feed and flung it over the marble floor, but the winged beast persisted with pecking his face. “Stop it! MY HEAD IS NOT A FEEDER!!”
It took an exceptional effort of willpower for Sasha not to laugh at the sight of her old man being preyed upon by the family pet.
Wow, she thought. Her old man? Was that how she saw Grimesy now? Seriously?
Perhaps up to a point. Okay, considering the options she had for parental figures back home, it wasn’t exactly the highest bar to pass, but it still meant something. Anything.
Who would have guessed this would be how they’d end up, especially given how they started off with her as his prisoner? Sure, it may have taken her helping him and the whole tower not getting turned into heron feed for her to be upgraded to his lieutenant, but they really had come a long way since then. There was a lot more honor and heart to the cranky old toad than she first thought, back when she wrote him off just as another blowhard with power. Now he genuinely considered her his equal both as a friend and comrade in arms. For Sasha, the feeling was mutual. A first for her.
When all was said and done, who else did she have left besides him and vice versa?
What the heck? Let’s tear this place up.
Untethering Joe, she whistled a tweet-tweet and gave the rope a gentle tug to encourage him to follow on their ‘indoor walkies’.
A cursory surveillance of the throne room told her there was a lot of work to be done. If this toad regime was to last a thousand years, the correct decor was an important first step. Thankfully for them, she knew a thing or two about fashion. For starters, there were way too many soft blues and purples. Rust red from top to bottom! She preferred keeping the stained glass windows, but they’d need entirely new designs. Hers truly would naturally feature in most of them, one showcasing her and Grime caving that narwhal worm’s head in with the Warhammer being an absolute must. The snakes coiling the stone pillars weren’t a bad touch, if just a bit too elegant for the whole ‘proud warrior race’ vibe they were going for, but she could still work with them. Now as for the throne, they were gonna have to replace it with something much more imposing. There was that super violent dragon show she and her parents used to watch that had the huge throne made out of swords. She was sure she had a picture somewhere on her phone to use as a reference.
“I’m sorry, what the heck is this?!”
Sasha could only denounce what they were gawking at as the single biggest affrontement to tasteful decorating known to man or amphibian. Yes, worse than inflatable furniture, carpeted bathrooms, beaded curtains, glass block bathroom windows, ‘live, laugh, love’ quotes on walls, rustic hearts, mason jars and nautical accessories all combined under the same inland roof.
Tapestries had their rightful place in a palace’s interior design, but the one sweeping across a section of wall depicting a gentle hearted Andrias sitting down by a lake, surrounded by flowers and lilypads was nothing short of vomit-inducing. Gathered at his feet and scooped up in his protective arms were his wide-eyed, childlike subjects. Even the fish and a lobster were surfacing to bask in their king’s magnanimity. Here the oversized salamander was truly the loving patriarch of everything the light touched. The mawkish display could only be topped off with a rainbow streaking across the sky.
Grime felt his stomach roile. If he ever needed an example to demonstrate the difference between kitschy and downright tacky, this was it.
“Y-y-y-yikes!” he gagged. “This thing’s gotta go!”
Sasha didn’t need a second invite. Besides, what else was Joe going to use to line his nest?
A joint effort tore the offensive piece from its place and it tumbled to the floor in a heap.
Dead silence fell over the room.
Hidden beneath the tapestry was... a mural. Including such a decoration in a throne room was hardly surprising, yet it was what it contained that shocked both the human and toad, so much so that they had to take a moment to recover.
“Woah,” they gasped at once, before starting to analyse what they saw.
The mural was a chaotic collection of nightmarish images painted on a night blue wall. Wild red flames spewing out hordes of beasts and the wreckage of buildings. Mountains of skulls and bones belonging to frogs, toads and newts alike. A flying... spaceship? A castle? Whatever it was meant to be, it firied a white beam up at what was unmistakably the Music Box. Pink, green and blue lightning bolts crackled out of the Box. Mesmerising orange gemstones or, more terrifyingly, eyes leaped off the wall and burned themselves into their minds. The frightening focal point of this one-way ticket to the school therapist’s office? Rising out of the middle of the inferno was the silhouette of a red-eyed, goliath-sized beast, its claws reaching up covetously towards the Box that hung right above its crowned head.
It may as well have been lifted straight from the tattered dream journal of a madfrog.
Any ideas of redecorating the throne room were long gone. Even the revolution they were spearheading suddenly seemed millions of miles away in the face of what they’d just stumbled upon.
Peering her eyes slightly, Sasha was the first to put a face to the shadowy leviathan, and when she did, she had to swallow her heart back down into her chest.
“Is that the king?” she asked, mystified. “With the music box?”
Sweat ran down the side of Grime’s nonplussed face. “If it is… it’s a really good thing we stopped him.”
Neither of them said it aloud, but both understood the situation at once. All this time they thought they’d been playing flipwart while the king played bog jump. Oh, how wrong they’d been. It was beyond anything that even the Toad Lords discussed. They knew that they had to reconvene with them as soon as the armies had reached the gate.
She took a couple steps closer to reexamine the mural more thoroughly, missed details emerging now that the initial shock began to wear off. Circuit board markings—the same inside her dad’s outdated computer when she foolishly dared Marcy if she could take it apart—worked their way around the images, serving as some type of frame. Odd choice for a world that didn’t even have steam engines yet. She also picked up the three small geometric figures standing atop the Box’s lid. An artist she was not, but they looked pretty human-like in design.
But humans did not exist in Amphibia. The three of them were the first of their kind to ever set foot in this dimension.
Weren’t they?
Alarm bells were ringing louder than ever before. This Andrias guy had been playing Anne and Marcy for his own ends this whole time, all to get his mitts on the Music Box! What did he plan to do with it? Right now, she still couldn’t say, but it was all bad. Outside of a kickin’ rock band, fire and skulls together were never a good thing!
Even Joe’s feathers were puffing up anxiously against her back. Not turning away from the mural, she raised her hand and patted his risen crest.
“I know, big guy. I don’t like it either.”
Grime’s voice rang urgently in her ears, “Lieutenant! Get over here, quick!!”
Sasha had spun on her heels and sprinted down the room to find Grime standing the wreckage of what used to be a display of armour. He’d evidently acted on a hunch while she’d been preoccupied. Judging by his thunderstruck expression, he’d just discovered something far worse.
“What is iooooh boy!”
This new second mural reminded Sasha a lot of Egyptian hieroglyphs. If there was any room for doubt about the technicolor stick guys, there was none here. Standing tall against an indigo backdrop in a neat row were the outlines of human beings; long gangly appendages, stumpy noses and everything. Some were wearing hooded capes, others were decked out in suits of armour. The couple in the middle looked particularly regal. No prizes for guessing the little wooden box they were holding in their hands, cementing their authority as if it were the globus cruciger.
Faded inscriptions were engraved along the bottom. They were written in a more archaic amphibian dialect, but being a toad of higher education, Grime was able to give translating them a decent shot.
These great beings of magic and might
Travelled from beyond to serve the night
Bow before these children of man
Or know the wrath of the—
“... Wu Clan?” He cocked his one good eye up at her. “Iiiii’m not getting it.”
There it was. Floodlights flashed in Sasha’s head. All colour drained from her face. A million and one thoughts were now firing across her brain at once, threatening to send her into cerebral shutdown.
It was at that moment she knew she’d been played. They all had. She didn’t know whether to be absolutely furious, betrayed or impressed.
Why that conniving, devious little—
That's when they heard the BOOM outside the window.
#amphibia#Disney's Amphibia#Disney Amphibia#amphibia disney#amphibia au#quisling marcy#Quisling Marcy Au#A Moth to a Flame#fanfiction#amphibia fanfic#amphibia fanfiction#Marcy wu#evil marcy#sasha waybright#captain grime#au#Amphibia true colors#true colors#amphibia sasha#amphibia marcy#alternate universe#alternate timeline
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Joshua Jackson interview with Refinery29
Against my better judgement, and at the risk of losing any semblance of journalistic objectivity, I start my conversation with Joshua Jackson by effusively telling him what a dream come true it is to be talking to him. See, like many millennial women who grew up watching the late ‘90s and early 2000s teen drama Dawson’s Creek, Jackson’s Pacey Witter means a lot to me. Pacey is one of the rare fictional teen boys of my youth whose adolescent charisma, romantic appeal, and general boyfriend aptitude hold up all these years later (unlike The O.C’s Seth Cohen or Gossip Girl’s Chuck Bass) and that is due in large part to the wit, vulnerability, and care Jackson brought to the character.
It’s the same intention he’s afforded all of his famous roles — Peter Bishop in Fringe, Cole Lockhart in The Affair, and even as a 14-year-old in his first acting gig as sweet-faced heartthrob Charlie Conway in The Mighty Ducks. Now, Jackson, 43, has matured into a solid supporting actor (with memorable turns in Little Fires Everywhere and When They See Us) and as a leading man who can draw you into a story with just his voice (Jackson’s latest project is narrating the psychological thriller and Canadian Audible original, Oracle, one of the over 12,000 titles available today on Audible.ca’s the Plus Catalogue) or find humanity in the most sinister men (he’s currently playing a sociopath with a god complex in Dr. Death). His magnetic pull is as evident as it was when he was the guy you rooted for in a show named after another guy’s creek. Jackson has never seemed to mind the fact that so many people still bring up Pacey decades later, and that’s part of why as an adult, he’s one of the few childhood crushes I still have on a pedestal. I tell him just a tiny slice of this, and Jackson graciously sits up straighter and promises to bring his A-game to our Zoom exchange. Jackson is in what appears to be an office, flanked by mess, like a true work-from-home Dad. He and his wife, fellow actor Jodie Turner-Smith, welcomed a daughter in the early days of the pandemic in 2020, and he tells me that fatherhood and marriage are the best decisions he has ever made. Jackson and Turner-Smith are a rare Hollywood couple who choose to let us in on their love, but not obnoxiously — just through flirty Instagram comments and cheeky tweets. Their pairing is part of Jackson’s enduring appeal. It’s nice to think that Pacey Witter grew up to be a doting dad and adoring husband, even if his wife’s name is Jodie, not Joey.
Jackson is an animated conversationalist, leaning into the camera to emphasize his points — especially when the topic of diversity comes up. White celebs don’t get asked about racism in Hollywood the way their counterparts of colour do, and when they do, they’re usually hesitant at best, and unequipped at worst, to tackle these conversations. Jackson is neither. He’s open, willing, and eager to discuss systemic inequality in the industry he’s grown up in. It’s the bare minimum a straight white man in Hollywood can do, and Jackson seems to know this. When he ventures briefly into trying to explain to me, a Black woman, the perils of being Black, female, and online, he catches himself and jokes that of course, I don’t need him to tell me the racism that happens in the comment section of his wife’s Instagram. The self-deprecating delivery is one I’m familiar with from watching Jackson onscreen for most of my life, and seeing it in person (virtually) renders me almost unable to form sentences. Jackson’s charm is disarming, but his relaxed Canadian energy is so relatable, I manage to maintain my professionalism long enough to get through our conversation. Refinery29: Your voice has been in my head for a few days because I've been listening to Canadian Audible Original, Oracle. What drew you to this project and especially the medium of audio storytelling?
Joshua Jackson: The book itself is such a page turner. I also love the idea of those old radio plays. It's like a hybrid between the beauty of reading a book on the page where your imagination does all of it. We craft a little bit of the world, but because this is a noir thriller married with this metaphysical world, there's a lot of dark and creepy places that your imagination gets to fill in for yourself.
I'm noticing a trend in some of the roles you've been taking on lately, with this and Dr. Death, these stories are very dark and creepy. But so many people still think of you as Pacey Witter, or as Charlie Conway, the prototypical good guys of our youth. Are you deliberately trying to kill Pacey and Charlie?
JJ: I'm not trying to kill anybody — except on screen [laughs]. It's funny, I didn't really think of these two things as companion pieces, but I won't deny that there may be something subconscious in this anxiety, stress-filled year that we've all just had. That may be what I was trying to work out was some of that stress, because that's the beauty of my job. Instead of therapy, I just get someone to pay me to say somebody else's words. So, yeah, that could be a thing [but] the thought process that went into them both was very different. Even though this is a dark story, [lead character, police psychic] Nate Russo is still the hero. [Dr. Death’s] Christopher Duntsch very much is not at all. I can't pretend to know my own mind well enough to be able to tell you exactly how [these two roles] happened, but it happened.
That might be something that you should work through with an actual therapist. JJ: Exactly. Yeah, maybe real therapy is on the docket for me [laughs].
So I was listening to Oracle and you're doing these various creepy voices — I’m sorry the word “creepy” keeps coming up.
JJ: Are you trying to tell me something? You know what? I wanted to skip straight to the creepy old man phase of my career. So, it sounds like I'm doing a good job.
You're doing amazing, sweetie [laughs]. So, I was thinking you must be really good at bedtime stories with your daughter doing all these voices. Or is she still too young for that?
JJ: No! She's all the way into books. Story time is my favourite part of the day because it gives me the opportunity to have that time with her just one-on-one. Her favorite book right now is a book called Bedtime Bonnet. Every night I bring out three books, and she gets to pick one. The other two shift a little bit, but Bedtime Bonnet is every single night.
I love that. Since you're married to a Black woman, you know a thing or two about bonnets. JJ: Yeah, well I'm getting my bonnet education. And I'm getting my silk sheet education. I'm behind the curve, but I'm figuring it out [laughs].
You said in an interview recently that you are now at the age where the best roles for men are. And I wonder if you can expand on that and whether you think of the fact that the same cannot be said for the majority of women actors in their 40s?
JJ: What's great about the age that I'm at now as a man is that, generally speaking, the characters — even if they're not the central character of this show — are well fleshed out. They're being written from a personal perspective, usually from a writer who has enough lived experience and wants to tell the story of a whole character. Whereas when you're younger — and obviously I was very lucky with some of the characters that I was able to play – you're the son or the boyfriend, or you're a very two-dimensional character. It's gotten better, but still a lot like you're either the precocious child or you're the brooding one. I will say that while I would agree with you to a certain point for women, I think that this is probably the best era to be a not 25-year-old-woman in certainly the entirety of my career. And it is also the best time to be a Black woman inside of the industry. There's still more opportunity for a 40-year-old white man than there is for a 40-year-old white woman, but it is better now than it has ever been. The roles that women are able to inhabit and occupy and the opportunities that are out there have multiplied. If I started my career in playing two-dimensional roles to get the three-dimensional roles, most women started their career in three-dimensional roles and end up at “wife” or “mom.” And that's just not the case anymore. There's just a lot of broadly diverse stories being told that centre women. So you're right, but in the last five years, six years I would say, there has really been a pretty significant shift.
And I think that shift is happening because who's behind the camera is also changing. JJ: Right? Who holds the purse strings. That's big. Who gets to green light the show to begin with? You have to have a variety of different faces inside of that room. And then, who's behind the camera. What is the actual perspective that we're telling the story from? The male gaze thing is very real. Dr. Death had three female directors. The central character of Dr. Death is an outrageously toxic male figure. Who knows more about toxic male BS than women? Particularly women who are in a predominantly male work environment. So these directors had a very specific take and came at it with a clarity that potentially a man wouldn't see, because we have blind spots about ourselves. We're in a space where there's a recognition that we've told a very narrow band of what's available in stories. There's so many stories to be told and it's okay for us to broaden out from another white cop.
I hope that momentum continues. Okay, I have to tell you something: I’m a little obsessed with your wife, Jodie Turner-Smith. JJ: Me too. As you should be! I love how loudly and publicly you both love on each other. But I need you to set the scene for me. When you are leaving flirty Instagram comments, and she's tweeting thirsty things about you, are you in the same room? Do you know that the other one is tweeting? What's happening?
JJ: We're rarely in the same room [writing] the thirsty comments because that usually just gets said to each other. But, look, if either of us misses a comment, you better believe at night, there's a, "Hey, did you see what I wrote?" One, she's very easy to love out loud and two, she's phenomenal. And I have to say, the love and support that is coming my direction has been a revelation in my life. I've said this often, and it just is the truth: If you ever needed to test whether or not you had chosen the right partner in life, just have a baby at the beginning of a pandemic and then spend a year and a half together. And then you know. And then you absolutely know. I didn't get married until fairly late in the game. I didn't have a baby till very late in the game and they're the two best choices I've ever made in my life.
I'm just going to embarrass you now by reading one of Jodie's thirsty comments to you. She tweeted, “Objectifying my husband on the internet is my kink. I thought you guys knew this by now,” with a gif that said "No shame." JJ: [laughs] That sounds about right.
She's not the only one though. There's this whole thirst for Joshua Jackson corner of the internet. And it feels like there's been a bit of a heartthrob resurgence for you now at your big age. How do you feel about that?
JJ: I hadn't really put too much thought into it, but I am happy that my wife is thirsty for me. What about the rest of us? JJ: That's great for y'all, but it's most important that my wife is thirsty for me. Good answer. You're good at this husband thing. You recently revealed that Jodie proposed to you. Then it became this big story, and people were so surprised by it. How did you feel about the response? JJ: Thank you for giving me the opportunity to give context to this story. So I accidentally threw my wife under the bus because that story was told quickly and it didn't give the full context and holy Jesus, the internet is racist and misogynist. So yes, we were in Nicaragua on a beautiful moonlit night, it could not possibly have been more romantic. And yes, my wife did propose to me and yes, I did say yes, but what I didn't say in that interview was there was a caveat, which is that I'm still old school enough that I said, "This is a yes, but you have to give me the opportunity [to do it too]." She has a biological father and a stepdad, who's the man who raised her. [I said], ‘You have to give me the opportunity to ask both of those men for your hand in marriage.’ And then, ‘I would like the opportunity to re-propose those to you and do it the old fashioned way down on bended knee.’ So, that's actually how the story ended up.
So, there were two proposals. I do feel like that is important context. JJ: Yes, two proposals. And also for anybody who is freaked out by a woman claiming her own space, shut the fuck up. Good God, you cannot believe the things people were leaving my wife on Instagram. She did it. I said ‘yes.’ We're happy. That's it. That's all you need to know. That has been a real education for me as a white man, truly. The way people get in her comments and the ignorance and ugliness that comes her way is truly shocking. And it has been a necessary, but an unpleasant education in just the way people relate to Black bodies in general, but Black female bodies in specific. It is not okay. We have a long way to go. Jodie is such an inspiration because it seems like she handles it in stride. She handles it all with humour and with grace. JJ: She does. And look, I think it's like a golden cage, the concept of the strong Black woman. I would wish for my wife that she would not have to rise above with such amazing strength and grace, above the ugliness that people throw at her on a day to day. I am impressed with her that she does it, but I would wish that that would not be the armour that she has to put on every morning to just navigate being alive. That's a word. That's a word, Joshua Jackson.
The 13-year-old in me needs to ask this. We are in the era of reboots. If they touched Dawson's Creek — which is a masterpiece that should not be touched — but if they did, what would you want it to look like? JJ: I think it should look a lot like it looked the first time. To me, what was great about that story was it was set in a not cool place. It wasn't New York, it wasn't LA, it wasn't London. It wasn't like these were kids who were on the cutting edge of culture, but they were kids just dealing with each other and they were also very smart and capable of expressing themselves. It's something that I loved at that age performing it. And I think that is the reason it has lived on. We have these very reductive ideas of what you're capable of at 16, 17, 18. And my experience of myself at that point was not as a two-dimensional jock or nerd or pretty girl. You are living potentially an even more full life at that point because everything's just so heightened. [Dawson’s Creek] never talked down to the people that it was portraying. That's one of the things that I loved about it as a book nerd growing up. The vocabulary of Dawson's Creek was always above my level and that was refreshing. To go back to the “diversity” conversation, you can't really make a show with six white leads anymore and that’s a good thing. But I also don't know how I feel about taking a thing, rebooting it, and just throwing Black characters in there.
JJ: I hear that. And there's certain contexts in which it doesn't work unless you're making it a thing about race, right? If you watch Bridgerton, obviously you're living inside of a fantasy world, and so you're bringing Black characters into this traditionally white space and what would historically be a white space. And now you are able to have a conversation about myth-making and inclusion and who gets to say what and who gets to act how. So that's interesting, but I don’t think you’re just throwing in a Black character if you changed Joey to a Black woman [or] Pacey to a Black man. What you're doing is you're enriching the character. Let's say one of those characters is white and one of those characters is Black. Now, there's a whole rich conversation to be had between these two kids, the political times that we live in, the cultural flow that is going through all of us right now. I think that makes a better story. All these conversations around comic books in particular like, "Well, that's a white character." It's like, Man, shut up. What are you talking about? It is a comic book character! Joey and Pacey don't have to be white. Dawson and Jen don't have to be white. And this is what we were talking about a little bit earlier. We get better the broader our perspective is, both as humans, but also in the entertainment industry. So if you went back to a story like [Dawson’s Creek], what was important in that show was class not race, which I think is true for a lot of small Northeastern towns. They are very white. But if you brought race into that as well, you don't diminish the amount of the stories that you can tell. You enrich the tapestry of that show. So I think that would be a great idea.
Make Pacey Witter a Black man in 2021 is what I just heard from you. JJ: Hashtag ‘Make Pacey Witter A Black Man’. There we go!
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So the ATLA Movie Is... Good, Actually?
Just kidding, of course it’s not, it’s so bad it sucked the paint off my walls. But after ten years of people pointing out its glaring flaws, why would anyone bother talking about this garbage heap if not to go the other direction? So here’s a very brief and very superficial list of things the movie does get kinda... not atrociously wrong.
And they won’t be fake hipster pokes, like “It’s fun to laugh at”, “The Rifftrax for this is OK”, or “Kudos to the actress for managing to say we believe in our beliefs as much as they believe in theirs with a straight face”.
(though now that I mentioned it, it is fun to laugh at, the Rifftrax for this is OK, and massive props indeed.)
Rasta Iroh
Yes, I know it’s not exactly the aesthetic of the real Iroh or that it makes no cultural sense for him to sport this do when no one else in the racebended Indian “OMFG what were you thinking Shyamalan” Nation does but goddamn, long-haired dudes are my one mortal weakness and I will ogle the hell out of him.
Jesus is that a man bun I see that’s it mum I’ve been deaded
Yue’s hair
No.
Now we’re talking. Yue’s hair turned white when the Moon spirit gave her life, so it makes sense for it to go black again when she sacrifices herself to revive the koi fish. It’s a neat detail I find myself expecting whenever I rewatch the scene in the show. Yes, I realize it’d be a pointless hassle to animate since she, unlike in the movie, immediately goes on to become the Moon herself but still. I like.
The Blue Spirit’s mop
Zuko, hun, what’s with the dance-off?
First of all, I want to imagine that Zuko the Theatre Nerd was about to leave his ship with just the mask like in the show but then stuck his head into the cleaning cupboard and went, “Yeah, more coverage might be good, even though it do seem mighty fried to shit”.
Which makes me giggle. I like to giggle.
And secondly, the hair’s movement is what makes the static mess of the Blue Spirit’s solo fight scene appear at least bit more dynamic because God knows the cinematography isn’t doing it.
Any particular reason why it’s at the edge of the action, shot all boring-like?
Now, I get why circular shots would be reserved for Aang while he’s in the practice area and then used once the two join forces. What I don’t get is why Aang’s part of the action scene has a defined visual style while Zuko’s delegated to a few stationary wide shots from afar as though he’s a tertiary goon, meaning that when the time comes to combine the respective pieces of cinema language and visually convey collaboration, there’s not really much to combine.
But as long as Zuko is stuck in this static mess, it’s that awesome disaster on his head flopping about that draws the eye, helping me understand that something even is going on over there.
It also prevents me from paying much attention to how the extras are mostly just staying put and a lot of the hits don’t land, so that’s good.
The music slaps
James Newton Howard is too good for this.
youtube
Pls ignore that the word “gods” is used in the ATLA universe
I can’t be the only one who constantly uses this piece to daydream about writing specific fanfic scenes instead of, you know, actually sitting down and writing them. It’s just so good at communicating a sense of sorrow while speaking of rebirth that I find myself getting misty-eyed whenever I listen to it. Unfailingly, the soundtrack as a whole manages to break through the mile-thick crust of horrible acting, confusing writing, and uninspired cinematography and make me feel things. And considering how everything on screen is working against it, that’s no small feat.
Imagine what a powerful experience it would be if the score was used in service of an actual movie.
Dev Patel
No wonder since he’s the only one in the film occupying that crucial intersection between “is a good actor” and “was given something to work with”. It also doesn’t hurt that he breaks with the trend of actors starring in martial arts flicks despite never having done any martial art.
And all EIP-jokes about “stiff and humorless” aside, he’s a pretty decent Zuko considering how abridged this version of the character is. A while ago, I remember hearing a reviewer say that with his comedic chops, Patel should have been cast as Sokka. And on one hand, yes, god, absolutely, I need to see that asap. But on the other? He captures all layers of Book 1!Zuko, the desperate obsession, rage, and self-loathing, and at the same time gives you a peek at the soft momma’s boy dork that’s buried underneath. For Christ sakes, he exudes intensity and ambivalence even when acting against an emotionless hunk of wood that’s giving him nothing in return.
Oh, and I guess there’s a tree in the frame.
Ba dum tss
What can I say, the guy’s good.
Showing vs telling
OK, so this movie is all tell and no show, except for one single moment. And it’s the exact moment where the original goes in the other direction in terms of how information is conveyed.
See, I never liked this. The revelation is preceded by Iroh giving advice to Zuko who scolds him for nagging. Iroh then apologizes, moves in to say the line above, and is interrupted by Zuko who seems rather uncomfortable with Iroh laying his feelings out like this. And once they’re out, Zuko verbally confirms that he knew already and Iroh didn’t need to bother.
All this extraneous information and pussyfooting ends up weakening what should be a profound scene that reveals to us, the viewers, how deep the relationship between these two in fact runs.
Compare to the movie where Dadroh acts like a parent by fussing and worrying, with Sonion needing a single look to tell him and us that he understands what it’s all really about.
It’s genuinely efficient and just good.
No Cataang
Fine, a bit mean-girl bitchy from me since I only start minding the ship in Book 3. And probably unintentional on the part of the creators since there are moments where I think they’re trying to set the romance up? There’s a, well, an attempt to recreate the famous introductory shot of fateful meaningful destiny of meaningness, there’s some slight note of saving each other’s bacon going on, I’m pretty sure they’re the only ones in the film who smile, and oh, right, Katara’s shoved into her post-canon useless role where she doesn’t ever do anything, and is all about Aang right from the get go.
Yes, I will blame the “executive producers” because a) I’m incredibly petty, and b) it’s perfectly in line with their vision of the character so why the hell not.
Hilariously, none of it reads on screen because the actors are just... yeah. These poor kids are struggling so much with delivering their own lines and portraying their own characters they don’t seem to have any strength left to create something between them. To be fair, the bare-bones shot-reverse shot style of their scenes doesn’t exactly lend itself to the idea they occupy the same universe, let alone are friends or each other’s crushes.
And I enjoy this immensely because it allows me to forget the depressing horror show Katara’s life turns into post ATLA.
Yes Zutara
I need to delve into this because it’s fucking hilarious. So in a movie which fails to establish the original’s central romance so spectacularly that if Aang got lost in a crowd I don’t believe Katara would notice, SomEOnE thought it’d be a good idea to add an utterly unnecessary non-canon moment where Zuko for some reason feels the need to pause his character-defining hunt for the Avatar which otherwise has him ignore everything and snap at everyone, and explain his central conflict to an unconscious peasant he doesn’t know, complete with gently pushing the hair from the pretty girl’s the soulmate’s the Water Tribe Ambassador’s the Fire Lady’s the love of his life’s her face away, AFTER his uncle nagged him twice to find a girl and settle down.
I just wanted to make sure we’re all on the same page and this is what we really saw.
Celibate Avatars
I have no idea why the decision was made, if TPTB thought expecting viewers to understand the story through the lens of Buddhism would be too much, or if the “executive producers” already worked their retconny magic. What I do know, however, is that there’s a big shift in worldbuilding and Aang’s struggle with his role as the Avatar stops being a personal conflict defined by a) his grief for Air Nomads, b) his notion of being robbed of the loved ones in his life, and c) the selfish attachment to Katara he confuses with true love. Instead, what he has a difficulty to accept is apparently a general notion of who Avatars are supposed to be, i.e. a fantasy version of Catholic monks, no family and worldly relations, period.
I guess either someone understood the original’s portrayal of de/attachment as “hermit no freaky”, or thought the audience would so why not go there outright.
Now, do I like this on its own? No, God no, it makes the world infinitely poorer and changes the story from an exploration of ideas which aren’t all that ingrained in the West, to a cliché tropester about a Catholic priest going Protestant so that he could be with a girl.
At least I assume that’s where they were going to take this eventually.
I mean, I think the direction was “look conflicted, this isn’t the final stage of your journey”?
But consider this—the show went there, it built on the concepts of Eastern philosophy and touched upon the ideas of spiritual awakening, only to swerve in the end and strongly imply they’re bullshit and Aang should have never wasted his time with them.
So honestly, I much prefer scanty worldbuilding to an insulting retcon by a damn rock.
Multiracial Air Nomads
Probably the most substantial “no hint of irony” point on this list and a genuinely good addition to the universe’s worldbuilding.
See, the notion of the elemental nations being perfectly separate and never mingling before Sozin has always been sketchy but it’s especially ridiculous in the case of airbenders. It never made sense to me for all airbenders to be Air Nomads and for all Air Nomads to be monks and for all monks to be chilling at the temples all the time to facilitate a quick everyone-dies genocide should an imperialistic warlord ever decide to commit one.
Because committing everyone to a single way of life at a handful of places kinda goes against the central philosophy behind airbending. Like the freedom and nomadism part.
Instead, there should be more variety to the airbending culture, with some staying at the temples as monks, hermits, and teachers while others live as nomads, travelling the world and creating more airbenders, with the resulting children in turn being influenced by the non-airbending cultures they grew up in.
And thus, not only should airbenders not be modeled after a single culture to create a one-size-fits-all lifestyle, but they should have the most diverse and dynamic culture out of the four nations.
And it’d be precisely this diversity which would pave way for an eventual reveal that some of them survived, that their complete extermination is impossible.
Because they’re everywhere.
You know.
Like air.
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La Arrogancia De La Niña
Read Posts 1-3 titled Betty, My Betty to catch up to the character analysis that I will be talking about here.
A little background: After Armando dropped Betty off he went to Marcela's apartment. He seemed indecisive if he wanted to stay or leave as he walked towards the dining table and then towards the elevator, spun and went back to the dining room while we heard Betty's monologue.
At first glance I did think Armando pulled away from Marcela because he had just been kissing with Betty. Though we know that he has been able to kiss Marcela even when he's snuck off with his models, so it's not guilt. When he goes to brush his teeth he says that he can't be kissing Marcela after kissing Betty, that if she found out she'd kill him.
From the very few interviews that I have seen about the characters I remember Jorge Enrique saying that Armando is obsessed with perfection, especially in women and because of that he is very impatient with Betty because she doesn't fit that vision of his.
Armando isn't physically attracted to Betty, that's a fact and the reason why he lives in such denial but he still acts with deliberation.
Just because he is in denial about his feelings it doesn't excuse the things he does knowing exactly what he feels about them.
Armando earases Betty's trace from him in this scene and after that he no longer feels guilty, he stares at Marcela and admires her beauty. He kisses her telling her how he needed to see her, how badly he needed her to help him forget the horrors of the day.
In this scene what caught my attention was that he makes eye contact with her like nothing. With Betty at the office he struggled to make eye contact with her or hold it. The only time he managed to was when the topic was only about work but when the conversation was over he couldn't look at her or make eye contact for longer than a second with her.
With Marcela he's able to hold eye contact, conversation, touch her, kiss her, tell her how he needs her. This parallels allows us to understand the reason being that one relationship is only based on physicality while the other one is based on person/human connection.
When their scene for that night comes to a closing Armando and Marcela are kissing and he has his eyes open and the exact same expression he had with Betty. He closes his eyes for a second and they pull away and hug. He looks confused and then rolls his eyes and shakes his head.
Here he is now feeling the effects of the kiss with Betty. He kissed her sober. He felt something again and unlike before he can't excuse it for being drunk so when he now kisses Marcela and he realizes that he feels off or not like before, he chucks it for guilt and dismisses the topic from his mind.
Now that we've got this background let's proceed to the scene at hand.
Mario and Armando go to have a briefing about the previous night.
When you're writing dialogue(if it comes naturally to you) you don't pick and choose every word used and think about the impact it holds. That is why it's so important to know your characters and understand them before you start writing. It's important to understand their role, who they are, everything inside and out, and then writing comes naturally. Once you've learned to distinguish their voice, their tone in writing your conscious becomes invisible and everything comes from your subconscious. In the first draft you go unfiltered. You pour out your tears, your blood, you whole heart into it, and when you rewrite it to polish it you go into detail. You remove the bits that don't really make an impact and you find the words that really push your point across.
Writing is truthfully, in my humble opinion, the art that truthfully transfers you and evokes emotion like no other. I paint, I write songs, I draw and I do all these other artistical things but writing, the gift that I rejected for years, is the most comforting and the most beautiful of all arts. When done right you don't only make people travel among space and dimensions but you cause a huge impact in their intelectual person. A pen and paper are the most dangerous weapons.
You might be wondering why I'm even talking about this on this post but it's important to understand and credit the true mastermind behind this story as he wrote it by himself, be it at a rush with no time, with all the time in the world, money or no money, he wrote something that impacted an entire world and inspired change.
A ruthless man falls in love with a beautiful woman.
You can say "but Betty isn't beautiful." and that's where the message is lost. Betty is beautiful. Beauty, people often think is based on the physical appearance of something or someone but Beauty is the essences of something or someone. We don't look at the sunset and think it's only beautiful because of it' colors. We look at it and think it's beautiful because of its power, of it's essences, and it's presens. We are in awe of its magnificence and that makes it beautiful.
So Betty is beautiful.
Betty is deserving of love, kindness, respect, faithfulness, loyalty, and so so much more because she is utterly beautiful.
Fernando's intention was to teach us that. That beauty is not skin deep. Beauty is the heart of someone and their impact in the people around them.
Armando isn't beautiful at the start of this. He is an ugly human being but with qualities that make him passible. To find his beauty you have to really dig into him.
The true monster here is Mario, but Armando is guilty for simply allowing Mario to continue this way.
Mario asks him if they kissed and Armando tells him that he kissed her twice.
Let's start.
"Well you know what I ended up not liking? Come over here that I'm gonna tell you more" Armando stands up and walks to the double doors and stands under the door frame of his office and the meeting room. Mario follows him.
"Imagine that this woman last night got hooked on that I couldn't be crazy about her. That I couldn't be obsessed for her. That she doesn't have enough qualities for me to fall in love with her."
What does Armando's body language tell us? Like last night, it truly boggles or frustrates him that Betty says things. It's almost like if he found it an insult for Betty to insinuate these things. Here his hand is moving vastly in the air making points of what Betty told him, his is speaking fast and his tone is frustrating all of this indicates he is offended or angry that Betty would think that of him.
in short translation: How could Betty think that I wouldn't be attracted to her? Crazy about her? Why, am I just a stupid superficial man? Who only cares about women's bodies and not who they are as a person? That she doesn't have any qualities that would drive me crazy and be obsessed with her?
Obviously he isn't going to tell this to Mario or really himself either.
"Well she isn't naive. She's seen herself in a mirror." Mario jokes.
"Of course but I had to name a bunch of qualities to convince her."
"Qualities?" he whispers.
"Yes." he whispers aggressively.
"Tell me, that imagination and creativity of yours; What qualities did you have to tell her?"
Armando shrugs and starts to mumble incoherently and Mario interrupts him.
"And did they[she] believe you?"
"Well I hope so."
"Did you kiss her?"
"I said yes. I kissed her twice." He whispers annoyed.
"What did she say? Are you both dating? Did she accept that she's crazy for you?" Mario sounds too excited with the last questions which gives the impression that he likes to hear all of this which is just gross.
Armando gives us a micro expression of confusion, it seems like his hands are inside his pockets and he shrugs and shakes his head.
"Well man that's what's weird about it. I did tell her I was obsessed with her, that I'm dying for her, but she's not of me." Mario gasps, shocked. "That she thinks I'm a very interesting man, that she admires me a lot, that I've been real special with her for a lifetime but that no, that's the only thing she finds attractive of me." Armando's quick pace but without stutters or word fillers allows us to know that he is confident in what he is saying(he's thought about this a lot) but nervous about what it means.
Mario gasps again and tells him "Do me the favor. The arrogance of that girl. You almost don't convince her, you have to kiss her two times and after that she tells you, Hey, I admire you." Between this cluster of words we see Armando thinking hard. He really is bothered or worried about Betty not really showing an interest in him.
Our egos are a huge part of who we are. We want to be liked by people and accepted, it's part of our genetic makeup. We are sociable beings. Now, if I told my boss that I admired them and that they always treated be respectfully and respected my job I think my boss would feel pretty happy about that. It would boost his ego.
Armando however isn't acting like that. If he was truly unbothered by Betty and her feelings towards him(it isn't because of the plan) than he'd just chuck it in a bin and say he'll work on it. He's literally spent two days with Betty since the kiss, he wants Betty to be fawning over him now?
His ego is hurt, his man ego. He wants Betty to like him, to like him as a man and not her boss and it isn't because of the plan because if it were than the man would understand that steady wins the race but he's an impatient man who wants Betty on the same page he's in.
"Yeah, yeah, see I think she still has that guy Nicolas stuck in her head." (ARMANDO IT'S BEEN THREE DAYS, THREE DAYS! WHAT DO YOU EXPECT?)
"No." Mario whispers.
"Yeah and I don't like it at all. Look at what she left on my desk this morning."
Now they turn their backs to the office and face the meeting room. While Mario holds the chocolate bar in his hand he tells a worried Armando:
"Aw but how sweet. Now, see this is a good sign."
"Really? Is it? You think so?" he says hopeful.
"Aw, man, please."
"Really?It is?" he looks at the chocolate bar in Mario's hand and then stares off, concentrated, in what Mario is saying.
"Look this means she accepts the relationship?"
"Really?" he whispers hopeful.
"Now you have to consecrate-" Armando shifts, now he rest his hand on Mario's shoulder and starts to bite his thumb nail as he listens closely to Mario, the love guru. "You have to eradicate from her head and heart that guy Nicolas Mora, want some?" he asks after taking a piece of chocolate out.
"Yeah, keep going." he takes a piece out too. "keep going that I like what you're saying."
Here the opportunity he's been waiting for presents itself. Betty accepting the relationship gives room for him to remove Nicolas from her love life, therefore leaves him in the center of it.
"These ugly[women] like Betty are very romantic." Armando nods. "So then you have to create a routine of a boyfriend." Armando nods, agreeing. "You have to feed the illusion, you have to maintain the relationship alive." once again Armando nods in agreement and with his hands gestures that he wants to hear more. "because starting from this point on my dear sir you are now the boyfriend of Beatriz Pinzon Solano." Armando's eyes are wide, lips pursed together(could be because he has chocolate in his mouth) and hands in pickets, he turns to his left, away from Mario for a brief second and has a face of "Are you for real?"
"But but how will-what kind of gifts, things do you mean?"
"Look brother, romance is like a bonfire. If you don't feed it the passion extinguishes. It's that simple. We shouldn't call this a win. I think Betty isn't sure about how serious your are[about your feelings]. You have to work on her more, make her fall in love and you have to show her that this is something very serious, you understand me?"
"But what kind of job that I have to do?"
That's the end of that scene.
Later when Mario and him are talking how to go about with the gifts and romantic details we get confirmation(post Thank You...) that when it comes to the physical of it, Armando pictures AA instead of Betty.
From here once again we do get a clear understanding that Armando is confused and when he's not confused(very different emotions) he is in denial of it. He is worried about the company. Mario only ever brings it up when he sees that emotions aren't motivating Armando enough to continue with the plan.
I think it's very important to understand the intention of what we are being shown here. The writing is meant to help us understand what they are saying. Words, speed of speech, gestures, expressions, and body language help us determine what is actually being said.
When Mario suggest that he take Betty to some tavern or club instead of restaurants Armando says that he doesn't think Betty will like those.
I think we've all established that Armando does care about Betty and therefore I don't need to breakdown his behavior so much. We understand that he is going along with this plan because he wants to keep Eco Moda and Betty all to himself.
Mario, The Love Guru, Calderon takes advantage of Armando's ego and his confused state of mind as of late to play him like a fidel and for some reason still when Armando finally confesses his real feelings for Betty to him he acts surprised.
Armando isn't a saint. He still willinging went along with the plan to make Betty fall in love so when Betty asked him "what about me?" he showed his true colors of selfishness because he dismissed her feelings. He dismissed the potential heartbreak and downfall of a woman who has been exceptional with him, who he recognizes as exceptional and yet for his ego and his company he used her like a pawn, even if it was his favorite one, he didn't care.
For him right now Betty is just an object that he likes a lot and these scene show us that.
[EDIT: While yes I still think Armando still views Betty as an object, this next scene shows us that that is starting to change.]
As the scene continues Mario tries to downplay Armando's guilt by saying that he's basically doing charity work because no man, especially one like him[Armando] would ever be interested in, muchless court, a woman like Betty.
Armando goes to clarify what he's trying to saying.
"You don't understand what I'm trying to say. I'm going to end up causing her harm. See I can tell it's really easy to get her to fall in love. " Now we hear from that man of the hour, how he feels about Betty's kiss though he only describes the way she kisses him, his expressions and his tone of voices allows us to see that he likes her kisses and how they make him feel, however because he thinks she's "ugly" it's hard for him to understand this.
"Everytime she kisses me it's with such a tenderness, a sweetness, where she holds my face and stares at me with such an admiration, like if I were her idol." While he says he speaks of it with fondness and I must admit, lovingly.
He doesn't hate her kisses and he doesn't hate the way he feels about them. So he didn't wipe away Betty's kisses and brush his mouth because of Betty's kisses because he was disgusted. He did it for Marcela and her ego and his guilt because the kisses meant more to him than any other kisses he's ever given, that's why the first kiss was strange. That's why he is so confused about it but what stops him again from understanding the significance of these feelings is Betty's outer appearance.
This is now trekking away from the objectification of Betty to a more sentimental route where he no longer just views her as his possession but an actual person.
The moment Calderon jokes "It's because you are her idol." Armando shuts off, he stops trying to explain himself or his feelings and annoyed asks Mario what does he think of the whole thing then?
"When we recover Eco Moda, pay off our debts, and recover our money, what then? What happens to her? What happens with that relationship?"
"Well you do what you do with every girlfriend that becomes a burden. You fire her, you get rid of her."
Remember that Armando was willing to fire Claudia, until Mario made him feel guilty for the lecture he gave him about Aura Maria. Even then after Marcela asked for her head he didn't hesitate to talk to Hugo about it, who gave him a lecture about it.
However he was hesitant to fire Betty, even before there was any romance involved. He didn't want to get rid of her so now that Mario says that once she gives them back everything they can get rid of her Armando looks at him in disbelief and angry.
Armando really doesn't want to ever have Betty outside of his life and he can't imagine his life without her in it in someway or form.
Now, Patty goes in yelling, Armando shows up, kindly speaks to Betty while aggressively speaks to Patty.
Again this display's Armando's guilt but also his desire to make Betty happy by treating her well.
#analysis of ysblf#armando ysblf#don armando#armando mendoza#betty#beatriz pinzon solano#betty pinzón solano#beatriz pinzón solano#betty ysblf#betty la fea#yo soy betty la fea#mario calderon
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