#you can take the man out of goth but um you can't take the goth out of the man. or something

[llycaons]

Ep1: wuji still fucking slays

I've watched some parts of this show more often than other parts, but I would estimate this is my...fourth or fifth rewatch, it has been a solid two years

god I forgot how long the op is. unlike netflix, viki doesn't have a 'skip intro' option

SECT LEADERS YAO AND OUYANG APPEAR BEFORE ANY OTHER NAMED CHARACTER BESIDES WWX. SCREAM

read in a joke yaoyang fic once that they did attack each other during that fight but I assumed the fic author made it up

editing is really overwrought, especially in this first ep. far too many fast zooms imo. seems clumsy and juvenile, tho I know a lot of editing on this show is really good. sets and music and (eventual) character work more than make up for it

don't really like this first ep tbh.

subtitles are WAY different than netflix's. I can hardly follow what the characters are saying sometimes

wwx's voice is way deeper than I remember, too

this confused me so bad but it's nice to have a reminder that wwx IS in his og body, but mxy always concealed his face so the mos don't actually know what he looks like and so wwx showing up to replace him doesn't seem weird to them. they must have been very similar in height, build, skin tone, etc. lucky coincidence

wwx looks so handsome in those beige robes gotta say

he mentions that peanuts and wine both don't taste as good as they used to, which is a curious addition that I assume is temporary because he doesn't mention it again. and because he's chugging that emperor's smile later like it's the only solace in this cold harsh world

WUJI!!!! the emotions I felt when it started during the first flashback to lwj....GOD what a fucking good song. all the music in this show is good but wuji is just hitting it out of the park. ACHING yearning. HIGH romance. POWERFUL pathos.

oh shit ding and tong were sweethearts in the book but I forgot they were also in the show, tho only briefly

this was also in the book. they have protective sigils sewn into their robes, which is implied here but I guess I missed it when I watched it the first few times. honestly a lot of this is still quite confusing to me

you know I give lsz a lot of crap for being so boring but it was genuinely very nice to see him be like 'please respect disabled people and be kind to them and believe them when they make accusations against people more powerful than them' bc wwx does a similar thing in the next episode and I feel like it's one of those things that gets swept under the rug amidst the louder themes of the story but besides just being a 'good' and polite boy he genuinely does care about and advocate for people who are denigrated and mistreated by the more powerful figures in their society

is it just me or is this shot kind of horny

wwx's reaction to lwj actually does make sense to me because he's still clearly mooning over him but he also can't trust that lwj will be on his side considering that in the past he kind of wasn't and wwx is probably still a bit paranoid and mistrustful so it makes sense? he's very sad about like. being reminded of him + knowing what he can't have and also is kind of freaked out at the idea of seeing him again

I FORGOT THEIR MONEY IS CHUNKS OF SPRAYPAINTED ROCK AND STARTED LAUGHING OUT LOUD. I LOVE THIS SHOW

EYYYY LITTLE APPLE!!!!!!!!!!!! I fucking love little apple bro

THERE HE IS!!!!!!!!!!! RED AND BLACK LEGEND IS BACK!!!!

Personal highlights: ep1

wwx going 'lan zhan' all heartfelt and gutted when playing wuji on the piece of grass

sexy lwj hand shot

the way that money looks

[madamechrissy]

Choso eats you out as a bestie <3

MDNI- Choso x fem reader-

Choso was gorgeous, tall, he had tattoos and piercings and dressed goth, a contrast to your bright pink, a clash of aesthetics. Women went crazy over him, and why not, he was beautiful. He was also quiet, smart and sweet. He'd even been the only man you'd had any experience with before this mess you've gotten yourself into ....

Six Months ago

“Choso… um are you sure? You don't want me to do anything back?” You both closed the bar that you work at that night, and Choso shocked you, asking if he could eat you out. Casually, out of nowhere. As a friend!?

“You look like you could use some relief, Barbie.” That was his nickname for you, the first time he met you he said it, and it stuck. “I’d be lying if I didn't say I'd love to give it to you. I can just finger you if you're uncomfy?” He's holding you, whispering in your ear, as he's gently caressing your pussy over your pink lace panties. You're soaking them under his touch.

“I've never really… I'm a virgin, Choso.” He pulls back, black brows raised, his lazy amethyst eyes drinking you in.

“A virgin? You…”

“I've been with a couple girls but we didn't go that far. Um. I've not done anything but kiss men.” He exhaled, blinking a bit and you gasp when he presses his lips on yours, he tastes so sweet, his lips pressure perfection. You grind your hips up eagerly.

“I was just going to please you, little Barbie, I wasn't going that far. I wouldn't do that not in a relationship, myself.” You exhale, running a hand around the back of his neck. Choso had his hair done up in pigtailed buns and fuck if he wasn't stupidly cute with them.

“I don't wanna ever ruin our friendship. You're so important to me.” He truly was, you all took care of each other, he was your Wednesday Addams to your Bianca Barclay. You'd held him as he cried over his breakup of someone he loved. He held you as you got rejected by your crush. You all watched movies and played video games. You love him to pieces.

“It won't, ever. Just let me take care of you, okay?” You nod eagerly, as you all stand in the break room of the eerily quiet bar, and then Choso is on his knees, looking up at you with those puppy dog eyes, asking for permission. 

“Yes, please. Um… tell me if I shaved good?” He laughs a bit, you can tell he's as nervous as you. Choso has only been with two girls from what he's said. He slides your panties down your thighs, exhaling as he sees you, and you go to close your thighs, so embarrassed, but he holds them firm, shaking his head.

“You're so beautiful down there. I promise.” You blink back emotion, then gasp when he kisses you there. “You missed a little.”

He spreads your lips open, looking inside, as your thighs are on his shoulders and you're now sitting on one of the chairs. You giggle. “Did I now?”

“Need me to shave you, Barbie? What's a bestie for? Oh wait… this.” He flicks his tongue up your slit, and you cry out, back arching at how good it feels. “Getting the homies off.”

“Choso! Ah… oh my… Choso…” His tongue ring hits your exposed clit, and you're soaking his face at the sensation, as the cool metal ball of it flicks up and down the underside of your clit.

He's moaning as he sweetly drinks you up, as his tongue lavishes you up, his thick finger teasing your entrance, until it sinks in, and your wetness pours down his endless amount of black rings. He's doing things that you've never felt, and you're too wet. Too…

“Choso I'm sorry, I never get this… it's too messy.” He chuckles at that, looking up at you with that sexy face.

Fuck he's your best friend what are you doing!?

“It's hot, I promise. I like how wet you are.” He murmurs and you're flushed, looking away for a moment.

“Promise you're eating me out as a friend?” He smirks, nodding, kissing you for a moment, and you taste yourself on him. “Can't lose you.”

“You won't. You're my best friend. And fuck if your pussy isn't the yummiest thing I've tasted. Can I continue, little Barbie?” He's smirking, his soft, quiet voice soothing as his finger slides back in, making you throb around it.

“Yes, please.” You cry out as he works a finger, hitting the little spot that you've not found yet, you see stars as his tongue ring is flicking your clit, and you're yanking his pigtails now, screaming out as he lazily pushes you over the edge.

He drinks you up, as a best friend of course, and you're grinding on his face, as a best friend.

“Ch-Choso! Best friend-ah- ever!”

A/N: So this is the reader's past with Choso in Fractured Desires. I'm kinda wondering should I make some Choso x reader now!? Bc I love him so much lol. Lmk if you'd be interested!

Fractured Desires - (It's Sugu x reader x Sato but past x Choso. This reader gets elite men with her mental damage lol)

[cuubism]

Bookstore cryptid Dream part THREE:

--

Hob squints at his phone, wondering how he possibly managed to set his phone language to-- is that Thai? What? Granted, he'd once set it to Japanese in an extremely ill-fated attempt to learn a new language, only to realize his error the first time he tried to drive somewhere and lost all sense of the nav. And then took three hours trying to figure out how to reset the language. Never again.

So how the fuck did he get it set on another language he can't even transcribe into Google translate to get to Settings?

He sighs, shoving the thing back in his pocket and resigning himself to a phone-less day. Sad, to be thinking of it like that. Once upon a time he could live without a constant internet connection, but no longer, apparently.

Then he gets down to the cafe, and the handwritten menu has been pencilled so badly it's illegible. What are they teaching kids these days if not decent penmanship? He'd have sworn the uni kids he'd hired to man the cafe when he's not there could read.

But he's supposed to open in about five minutes, so he leaves it for now.

The rest of the morning goes reasonably smoothly. Hob makes coffee and sandwiches while one of the hopefully-literate uni kids handles the orders--he finds the repetitive process of espresso-making soothing.

Then Dream comes in, and Hob takes over. It's his cafe, and he'll take the orders from his pretty goth "librarian", thanks.

"Dream," he greets, before Dream can say 'Hob Gadling' in his posh, solemn voice. "You going to let me make you something? Or just delivering another book? Because I'll be honest, I'm not sure I'm ready for another revelatory story from my past yet."

"I will accept coffee, thank you," says Dream, inclining his head. Hob punches it into the machine--he's already decided he's not charging Dream for anything, Dream keeps giving him free books after all--but he's got to keep inventory.

Or he tries to punch it in. The screen is all glitchy and scrambled, the words unintelligible, and he sighs in frustration. Damn thing.

Hob gives up, makes Dream coffee, and when he returns Dream does, of course, have a book for him.

"Simply a recommendation," he says, when Hob looks at it with some trepidation. "I think you might enjoy it."

Hob exchanges the coffee for the book. Looks at the cover. And squints in confusion. "Dream, I'm sorry to tell you this, but I can't read Arabic." Or whatever language. He's pretty sure it's Arabic, but he's not an expert.

Dream, for once, looks flummoxed. "This is an English copy," he says.

Hob opens the cover, wondering if maybe it's a translation inside--but nope, still Arabic. "I'm pretty sure I know English, Dream."

Dream takes the book back. Turns it over. Flips through the pages. Holds it by the spine and shakes it out. Looks at the cover again, then at Hob. "This is English," he says.

What this is is the dumbest conversation Hob's ever had. "Dream. Come on."

"Does it not look like that to you?" Dream asks. When Hob shakes his head, Dream sets his coffee and the book down on the counter and takes Hob's hand, dragging him out into the cafe proper. Hob, stunned, just follows him.

Dream pushes him down into a seat. "Read this," he says, and somehow procures another book, smaller this time, from absolutely nowhere.

Hob looks at it. "This is in French." He does know some French, but not whatever niche topic this is about.

Dream makes a frustrated sound. "Spell it out."

And Hob... tries. But every time he latches on a word, the letters.... change. Somehow.

"What," he says, though it's more of a squeak. "I swear to god I can read."

Dream takes the book back. "It's as I feared." Then, instead of explaining whatever the fuck he means, he asks, "Where do you live?"

"Um." Hob tries not to imagine Dream in his living space. "Upstairs?"

"Come, then." And Dream stands and drags Hob after him to the stairs in the back hall, as if he's the one who lives here and not Hob. He's very determined, and still hasn't explained a bloody thing.

Once Hob's let them in the flat above the cafe, Dream goes straight for the bookcase. It's still a bit of a mess--Hob hasn't entirely moved in--but Dream starts scanning the heaps of books anyway, running his fingers along the spines, flipping them over, restacking them in complicated piles. Hob just watches nervously.

Finally, Dream whirls around, a thin black paperback volume clasped in his hands. "I thought so," he hisses at the book. And then to Hob: "Did you get this recently?"

"Um." Hob thinks back. It's not one from Dream's shop, he still only has the two. "Yeah? Think so. Someone left it downstairs." The cafe has a shelf of borrowable books that people can take as long as they leave one in return.

Dream actually growls at the book. Hob's not sure why. It's just a book of poetry.

"Will you tell me what's going on now?"

"The book I gave you is not in Arabic, Hob Gadling," Dream says. "Nor French. You have been cursed."

Hob has... a lot of scrambly thoughts about that sentence. But the first that comes out is, "By a book?"

Dream nods. "It was planted in your possession by whoever left it downstairs."

"Why? Wait, what does it even do? Make things look like different languages?" Hob really hadn't thought opening a cafe was going to get him put on a magical hit list. Jesus Christ.

"It makes the written word unintelligible to you," says Dream. "Whether via a language you don't speak, or via simple recombination." Hob remembers-- of course. The phone. The menu board. "More a nuisance than a true threat to your person. It was meant to send a message."

Hob sits down heavily on the sofa. Cursed? Seriously? "What the hell kind of message, Dream? If you hadn't noticed, I'm running a cafe, not courting the occult."

Although. Maybe he'd like to be courting the occult. If that occult is Dream.

"A message to me," says Dream grimly. "I have enemies."

Hob can't help himself, he bursts out laughing. "You own a bookstore, how do you have enemies?"

"It's a dangerous occupation," Dream says darkly. He sits next to Hob. "I... am sorry. That you were drawn into it. A penalty of being associated with me."

He sounds sad now, not so much about the "enemies", but at the thought that his company might have brought Hob to harm. Hob lays his hand over Dream's where it rests on his knee. "Hey, it's not your fault. And you know, there's still audiobooks."

Dream chuckles. "I can undo the curse," he says. Which is relieving. "And I will destroy this." He sets the poetry book on the coffee table with a look of menace.

"You know, I haven't even read it?" Hob says. "Just the first few pages."

"It is very good," Dream says, to his surprise. "Hence its danger." Then he turns Hob's face towards him with a hand on his chin. Hob goes totally still in surprise. With his other hand, Dream taps his forehead, and a static shock jumps through Hob's body. "There."

A cloud Hob hadn't realized was covering his mind dissipates. "That easy?"

"For me." Dream stands again, swiping up the poetry book. He looks like he's about to leave, and Hob is almost reeling too much to stop him, but he manages to snag Dream's sleeve. "Wait, won't you stay and finish your coffee? And I want to hear about the book that's not actually in Arabic."

Dream gives him a tiny smile. "Very well. For a little while." He tucks the poetry book into the depths of his coat, and Hob doesn't see it again.

Hob shepherds him back downstairs, makes him more coffee as the other's gone cold, and hears all about The Golden Tree, a novel about a modern-day quest inspired by the Holy Grail. And nothing more about curses, though he is rather interested in that, too.

And in Dream. And his strange magic. And his serendipities.

But he figures he'll have time to learn more about that.

Especially if he's intent on courting the occult.

[silly-l1ttle-guy]

how i think bucci gang would confess their love

i don't even know anymore man, enjoy the hcs

------

Bruno Bucciarati

very calm about it

it just slipped out one day lmao

he was just chilling with Abbacchio and he was talking about something

"I understand how you feel, Abbacchio. But you have to be more careful, ok? I love you." "I know- WHAT?!"

bruno acted like he meant to say that

he was screaming on the inside tho

the moment he got home he was giggling and kicking his feet

he has a boyfriend now

Leone Abbacchio

he probably confessed while drunk

he's the type of guy to push his feelings away and not pay attention to them

but spoiler alert, you can't push away your intense love for Bruno, dumb goth whore

probably tried to avoid Bruno for a bit

it worked until Bruno took care of him while he was drunk

"Ok Abbacchio, it's time to go home now-" "but I love you!"

Bruno just stared at him for a second before bringing him home and hoping to GOD that Abbacchio wouldn't remember what he said

he did

they had a deep conversation after and started dating

Abba looked a little happier that day

Giorno Giovanna

very straight forward about it

walked up to Fugo and said "we need to talk"

istg Fugo almost shit his pants, he thought he was gonna get in trouble or some shit

instead giogio just sat him down and told him he liked him

"What did you need, Giorno?" "I'm in love with you." "...." ".........." "....WHAT?!"

Giorno started listing everything he loves about Fugo and strawb boy almost fucking fainted he was so flustered

Giorno had to stop halfway through his rant to make sure Fugo was ok

he ended up gaining a boyfriend and was super happy and giddy for the rest of the week

everyone else was wondering why he was smiling so much and flapping his hands (it's because he's autistic)

also clung to fugo like a glue trap

Pannacotta Fugo

another one to push down his feeling and try to dismiss them

he couldn't look at giorno for more than five seconds before turning bright red and looking away

EVERYONE knew he liked giorno lmao (except giorno)

he probably didn't confess, instead giorno overheard mista and narancia teasing him about it

"Still got a crush on the golden boy, Fugoo??" "shut. up." "C'mon! We just wanna know!" "SHUT THE FUCK UP" "I'll take that as a yes" "FUGO LOVES GIORNO!" "I DO NOT-" "You love me, Fugo?"

Fugo immediately shut up at slowly turned to Giorno with the most terrified expression you'll ever see in his life

bro looks like he just pissed himself

cue nara and mista laughing their lungs out in the background

he just quickly brought giorno into another room and quietly explained that he had feelings for him

it was all good because he gained a boyfriend

he was a lot happier for the rest of the week

Guido Mista

verrryy flirty

but he only uses cringy flirts

sometimes they're good but most of the time...

"hey, are you lightning? cuz you're McQueen. KACHOW"

since i don't ship him with anyone YOU (yes you, person reading this) GET TO BE THE UNLUCKY PERSON MISTA CONFESSES HIS LOVE TO

when i say unlucky i mean unlucky

he'll never leave you alone

"I need to go piss hold on" "can I come?"

LIKE NO YOU CANNOT

probably confessed with a love letter (he's a sucker for romance)

but like he just handed you a letter and ran off

he'd be very happy if you said yes

everyone would know that he's dating you by the end of the week

also do NOT sleep in the same bed as this guy, he snores louder than a nuclear explosion

Narancia Ghirga

shy. that's all i'm gonna say

he'd try to act chill and fail miserably

my guy tries to say something flirty and stumbles over his words so bad he trips

"hey, so, uh, d-did it, um, hurt when- when you, uh, y-you fell from heav- heaven? Uh, actually nevermind! OKBYETALKTOYOULATER!" *trips*

cried to Mista about it later

i also don't ship narancia with anyone so YOU, THE READER, ARE THE LUCKY ONE WHO GAINS HIS AFFECTION

and when I say lucky, I mean LUCKY

sweetest boy ever

he'll literally die for you

probably tried to confess romantically but stumbled over his words and got so nervous he almost passed out

just ended up screaming that he loves you

"s-so, basically, uh, the thing is, um, I uh... FUCK IT! I LOVE YOU!"

his face was so red

very giddy and happy for a long while if you say yes

he'd proudly show you off

Trish Una

once again, YOU get to be the one she's attracted to

surprisingly chill about it

she compliments you on a daily basis

expect her to constantly be around you

mf she is NOT leaving you alone

"I need to piss" "let's go piss together queen"

i fully believe trish is a hardcore lesbian

she cringes at the thought of dating men

"I'm sure one day you'll find a kind young man to take care of you" "EW no"

CONFESSES LIKE A NORMAL PERSON

"you wanted to talk to me?" "yeah, so I kinda have a crush on you and I was wondering if you felt the same way?"

very smiley if you say yes

also she will NOT let go of you hand

------

the end

[astarab1aze]

// light blue heart because my computer is old and therefore legally blind. Husbies.

muse relationship headcanon game

who curses more?

you and i both know it's garrett and why. mans is from brooklyn, and has always talked mad shit. who doesn't love to drop an f bomb all the time? he's always been a punk, and he's always had one hell of an attitude when he was pissed. but v also says fuck. :I hmmmm. hmmmm, ooze, hmmm. i think i need your take on this honestly. this one's a toughie for me. in my heart, it's garrett, but i know v's been playin' pretty fast and loose in his old age-- jshdgfs

who is more patient?

it depends on the context. garrett can sit and stay no problem, but he gets impatient and irritable too. where it comes to v, garrett is unwaveringly patient, if a little pushy at times - he can wait and take a hint, it just won't stop him from trying to get v to let him put his mouth on him-- no no, but really he is genuinely very patient with v. everyone else? no. not at all LMAO. he has a hotter temper than v, though that isn't to say he doesn't also have his moments.

who does the driving?

.....don't they walk everywhere, wdym ksdjhfsd we've never written them in a vehicle... except for just...sitting there, while it was off ofc. taxi makes more sense to me since they're based in europe iirc (red grave's in britain right? lol). i just can't see them driving. garrett can ofc but like...why. when v can just hop on his back, summon him as his teleporting demon mount since he's the only person alive who knows his name and the importance of that--

who is louder? who is quieter?

they can both be loud and quiet, this one's all context.

who is more physically affectionate?

garrett, because he literally can't keep his hands to himself when it comes to v. he is so in love, always, forever, and will show it in every way he can. verbally, physically, emotionally-- are you kidding me? it's he. v's more reserved, but relents ufufu

who is more likely to tease the other?

this is an entirely mutual affair and i don't think i need to tell you why >:)

who is better with time management?

....i think they both take certain things very seriously and are, thusly, very determined to resolve x thing quickly and efficiently as they can. that doesn't always work out, as we can see with shokolade. or the entire cult of moloch issue. they were so fucked. EVEN MORE FUCKED IN VIOSTRA. ooze. garrett is definitely freaking the fuck out over everything, urgent but also lay low then keep moving in an effort to protect-- i don't think they think about it honestly skjdfh ACK

who wins the arm wrestling matches?

garrett...... :I himbo remember. v is beefcake moronsexual skdjhfsd

who controls the music in the car ride?

i'll substitute with the bar-- um, both of them? duh. >:I they have similar tastes in music!!! 80s, punk, goth-

who covers dinner when they order in?

garrett. you know how he is. he's gotta be a gentleman!

who is more outgoing? who is more shy?

garrett has always been the more outgoing, talkitive, flirty, generally out there one out of the two. v's more reserved and aloof, but i wouldn't say shy, specifically, except in certain circumstances. like in the beginning of his and garrett's relationship? yeah.

who has the more outlandish fashion sense?

v all the way. what are those fucking sandals-- garrett's good with a t-shirt and ripped jeans ok, classic bad boy vibe for him

who starts the tickle fights? who ends them?

it would absolutely 100% be garrett who starts them, and v who ends them. i fully believe this. uncompromisingly.

who has the darker/more “edgy” sense of humor?

garrett. :I the evidence his encounter with saryn where he thought it amusing to blast him with hellish lava until his neck fucking melted. 'hehe woops! better call bianca--' >:I he thought it was concerning but funny, and all he actually cared about in the moment was if it would piss v off or not.

who is more competitive when it comes to games?

they both have competitive streaks but where v's concerned, garrett's more willing to relent.

who has the bigger appetite? the bigger sweet tooth?

garrett could eat forever. human garbage disposal. he will try anything once and you know this very well, from demonic helltree to magical grass that'll get you high skjdhf he's so dog coded

who is more likely to get in a confrontation in public?

garrett. guard dog. with a temper. also demon of wrath (and lust)--

who hosts the parties/hangouts? who organizes them?

i think it really depends, but v and bee keep in contact i'm 10000% sure, well and garrett too-- it's really vergil who doesn't want to socialize skjdhfsd but i still think about vergil and garrett cracking open a cold one and having a bro chat outside--

who is better at cooking? do they ever cook for each other?

garrett is. he be makin' blackberry pancakes every sunday with bacon, eggs, and hashbrowns unu with fresh coffee. you know how he rolls. gotta take care of pretty boy over there like a good husband should

who is more likely to engage in dangerous and/or illegal behavior?

both of them since they're devil hunter skjdfhs

who is more likely to notice when something is wrong with the other?

they're both fairly quick on the uptake when it comes to each other. i don't see them ever not immediately knowing something was up and needing to sort it through and fix it. i just know how garrett is, he can smell it on v. and v is so intuitive and aware-- they just pay attention to each other when it matters and when it doesn't. they're so good to each other, i'll accept nothing else.

who does the talking in public settings (i.e. to the waiter at a restaurant)?

they both very much are capable of speaking up for themselves each, and they respect each other's autonomy besides. simple as.

who is more likely to extend a helping hand & provide emotional support?

v and i don't need to explain ksjdfhd garrett's an ass and could generally give a shit less about other people in the grand scheme of things, unless it has something to do with v. well, and sometimes their adopted grown up children :I and bee and vergil... and fumis. but so...!!!

who is the bigger prankster? do they get the last laugh or do they suffer for it?

they can both be very mischievous but i think garrett's more likely to actually prank and then promptly suffer for it in some way ksjdhfs then v, much to his own chagrin, will be wooed in the aftermath. i'm just saying. u kno. u know how it would go.

[underwhelmingalchemist]

21 and 38 for the asks! <3

That moment when you don't notice an ask until a day later and the post has already been buried under 100+ notifications so you gave to dig to find the original so you can actually play the ask game you asked to play in the first place @_@

Anyways this got long so I'm going to stick it under a read more:

21: What I love most about myself: Um good question. Not in like a "I don't have anything I like about myself" way but in a "oh boy what do I like most" way. So I'm just going to lay out a couple things. I really like how I look, and more than that, I like that I like how I look. I used to hate my appearance. I would pick apart every detail of my face in the mirror and figure out which parts I would ideally change to be more pretty, or hide my body behind hoodies in California summer weather and refuse to ever go swimming, or put on heavy foundation to hide any and all possible blemishes. And then I became an adult, got out of high school, gained weight, and started playing around with self-expression through things like cosplay and alt fashion and makeup, and I started to realize: I'm actually pretty fucking hot. It doesn't matter if I'm wearing makeup or none or a titty top or a t-shirt or going masc or femme or wearing pastel decora or minimalist goth or just my work t-shirt and cargo shorts. I'm hot. I can't point to any one thing about me that's attractive, so maybe it's just the confidence. Hot girl (gn) vibes, if you will. And the fact that I can look in a mirror and not only actually like who I see looking back at me, but also think they're attractive is incredible, and something I hope one day I can take for granted. I went on a bit long about that, so I'll try to be shorter with this one. I like that I try to be kind. Am I always kind? No. I definitely have moments and situations where I am quite notably unkind. But I try. And it's led to some of the most genuine human connections with strangers I've ever had. I don't talk about it many of them online, just because I don't want to seem like I'm bragging about how good of a person I am, but I may as well talk a bit here since nobody actually reads these things. A couple weeks ago, a mom came up short on her groceries after paying for half of them and started panicking because her card wasn't working, so I paid the rest and told her to go and she nearly cried. I similarly paid for some groceries for a (presumably) unhoused woman who comes into the store a couple times a week to spend gift cards and loose change on food when she was struggling to find the funds in her coat, and now whenever she sees me she actually looks at me and smiles. I think it helps that I know her routine by now and always let her scan her own food, since she seems to have anxiety around others handling it. I once gave a girl flowers because she mentioned she was having a hard day while talking to me on register, and she broke down into tears, told me it made her day a little easier, and that she'd just lost someone close to her. I gave her a hug, and instead of getting upset about the wait time, the girl in line behind her also came up and hugged her. I've had a lot of people break down when I give them flowers, actually, and it's incredibly rare that anyone behind them is ever upset about the extra minute it takes to get them some flowers. And this is getting long, so I'm going to cut it off here. But I try hard to be as kind, and I think that means something.

38: My childhood career choice: I think I've always wanted to be a teacher primarily, but when I was a kid I kind of wanted to be everything. Especially Spider-Man.

Thanks for the ask!

Find the game here x

[squicksquak]

Hsgsgdhxhkabx I'm not sure if you take requests or anything but from that post of what they drive I had an idea um. What do you hc they're like when driving on long trips? Like in each of their own cars and stuff. Maybe with some of the other characters too not just the one bro that owns the car?

aaaaa I'm sorry this is so late i get bursts of inspo and then die for a month nsbsnsvsn also little warning that this is NOT proofread oops

the post anon is referring to is this one

The om! bros on a long trip !

Mammon

-im sorry you want him to drive HIS BABY for THAT long? AND TAKE PASSENGERS? nah not happening. he only lets beel on his bike but NOT as a passenger. nuh-uh no way.

-the only way he'd drive on long trips is if they were less than 6h and he was alone so he doesn't need to stop every five minutes.

-and if anyone says to just take the family car he'll pretend to have lost his licence bc honestly who wouldn't believe him?

-my man just really hates long drives what can i say

Lucifer

-The main driver lmao

-if he HAS to take his own car he will but he'll print out rules, laminate them and give them to whoever he has to bring lmao

- only allows his passengers to eat things that don't stain and you better have good bladder control bc mans stops like twice for bathroom breaks

- if his brothers get too noisy he puts on headphones and threatens them to turn around and go home like the fucking mom he is

-if he's alone he'll be more chill and blast classical/goth music

-also never stops places overnight unless completely necessary. he does trips in one go, not bc he doesn't like long drives he acctually does but stopping overnight somehwere is just a waste of time. he's used to being exhausted anyway so.

Levi

-my mans doesn't have a licence and i stand by that

-if he had to drive he'd probably be very bad at it and get arrested LMAO

"this is SO NOT like the simulators"

-boohoo fish man learn how to drive

Satan

-bmw driver.

-need i say more.

-nah jk (not rlly) , he doesn't like long drives but he will switch places with whoever is driving if they wanna rest/take a break

Asmo

-Just like Satan he doesn't really like long drives he prefers sleeping or listening to music but will switch places with the driver if asked

-He's the best driver and he could be going 200 and you still wouldnt feel it somehow. magical behind the wheel

-He makes quite a lot of stops and refuses to drive without coffee or tea, he gets bitchy driving without smth to drink

Beel

-Loves long drives but makes a lot of stops, usually for food or to refuel bc this man could make a 6h drive last three days by always going off track and "exploring"

-Especially if he's with belphie on his bike he will stop overnight somewhere

-If he's in a car and with the rest of the brothers the trip probably won't be prolonged too much

Belphegor

-another brother that won't drive

-he likes long drives but he'd much rather just sleep

-If he's alone or with beel on his bike he'll drive no problem but if he has to drive the car he'll need a lot of convincing

-road rage.

-he leaves Satan impressed with the long line of curses that come out of his mouth if another driver even looks at him wrong

-he just can't take stupid people on the road and tbh i don't blame him

[anystalker707]

Spicy horror

Pairing: Frank x [fem] Reader Word count: ~ 4 000 Genre: Smut / Fluff Summary: It's Halloween, and (y/n) and Frank finally confess their crushes to each other when binge watching horror movies on Frank's place. Kind of content: Praising / Protected / Oral

Requested by @thisisjustforrequestingfanfics (can't tag you, sorry hhh my T*mblr is acting weird)

a/n - I'm sorry that I coudn't proofread, I might do it soon; I was supposed to be asleep rn

"You're just annoying, old man," I tease with a grin. "But don't whine or else you'll ruin the makeup!" I continue spreading the white concealer over his face, careful to get it on the corners around his nose and around his eye, though not to irritate his eyes.

"No, fuck you," Frank groans, his face twitching to suppress any expression. "Why can't we watch it again tonight? They're the best movies! And stop calling me old man, it's just my birthday! I'm not decomposing or anything!" Despite his words, he smiles, opening his eyes once I pull away, leaning back against the chair of the desk – I roll my eyes.

"Yeah, I agree." I grab the eyeshadow palette from the desk and move closer to him again. "TCM is a great series and all, but can we not watch it for a single week? It's your birthday and we can watch literally any horror movie! And it can be special, like, not something we've watched a thousand times already to the point we already know most of the lines." I glare before motioning for him to close his eyes.

Frank sighs grumpily, leaning his head back. "What are you planning on, then? Alien? Jaws?" He lets out a weird cry when I slap the side of his head lightly, though he is soon chuckling.

"And then you complain when I say how annoying you are!" I spread the dark eyeshadow over his eyes, humming. "It's been a while since we've watched The Howling, Evil Dead, House of Wax. I mean, 'm not gonna complain if we decide on Alien and Jaws either." He hums, pouting. "Don't worry, you're still my favorite old man." I press a kiss to his head.

"I hate you," he laughs.

After a little bit of fake blood and retouching on my makeup, the two of us are leaving Frank's house to go to school, waving his mother goodbye. We don't look like what most of the kids will go dressed up as – not putting enough effort nor choosing the same themes as the jocks and popular people and not invisible enough just to throw on whatever in a black theme. Frank looks like a chill vampire with Bela Lugosi's Dracula references, though still looking like a punk, while I decided on one of my favorite characters. Nothing too extra, but still in the vibe.

"You look ridiculous with that hair slicked back." I kick one of the pebbles on the sidewalk. "I prefer the hedgehog or whatever it is in the normal state."

"I honestly feel like I could kill someone just from biting their jugular off." He grins, throwing his nose in the air – I can't help but to chuckle; he's adorable. "But not gonna be anyone from school, they're not worth it neither their blood would taste good." He twists his mouth. "I feel like most I'd get would be booze, botox and steroids."

"Damn," I snort, "awfully accurate. You're gonna starve, sorry."

Frank pouts, looking down, but a smirk soon tugs on his lips as he takes a step closer. "But you're not that bad, baby, you know?"

"Oh, fuck off!" I roll my eyes, clicking my tongue. "You just want to get in my jugular!"

Both of us burst out in chuckles and our conversation eventually dies down when we walk past the gates to inside the school, replaced by jokes at other people's costumes, sometimes needing to hold onto each other from laughter.

We walk into the first class, already a bit late, but all it does is to attract everyone's attention the moment we step in.

"Ridiculous, as always," some girl mutters under her breath. Funny.

Frank wraps a hand around the length of the coat to stupidly bring it to cover the lower part of his face, looking around with narrowed eyes then wide ones. "I smell not just a lot of blood here," he says in a low and raspy voice, "but also stupidity!" He points at the girl judgingly, making her twist her mouth disgusted.

"I hope Freddy Krueger visits you tonight," I say when walking past her, patting her shoulder. A scream comes from her when noticing the fake blood stain I leave behind on her white outfit, having Frank and I chuckling on our way to the back.

No one really pays attention to the classes – it's Halloween, we're even in stupid clothes and anxious for whatever is going to happen later in the day, so the teacher doesn't even bother scolding Frank and I for talking nonstop in the back of the classroom. To be honest, I think only the goody two shoes are actually doing something, sometimes turning around to glare at the others.

"Okay, okay, shut up for a minute!" I tell Frank, taking a look at the messy words over my notebook to check if I forgot to write something down. "We've got The Howling, Alien, Evil Dead, House of Wax, Dawn of the Dead, Funhouse, Pumpkinhead..."

"Fright Night," Frank continues, "Opera, Cannibal Holocaust, Texas Chainsaw–"

"I said no TCM! Fuck you," I curse, rushing to write everything down, crossing out TCM when I accidentaly write it down.

"Friday the 13th, Poltergeist, Near Dark and Elm Street," he finishes, glaring at me. He hits my shoulder, not enough to hurt. "I'll make you watch TCM with me until you have memorized every single frame of it!"

"Your TCM phase will have died down by then!" I twist my mouth bitterly. "Sorry to kill the hype, baby!" I throw my nose in the air with a chuckle at his sulky manners. He furrows his eyebrows, sucking in a breath for words he never really gets to say. "And we still got to watch all these goth movies and shows lying around! Do you think it was easy finding the 60s Addams family show on DVD? Or that one Frankenstein version on cassette." Okay, the last one was easy to find in a yard sale, but still, it was just luck.

"Okay, mommy, please just don't punish me," Frank says with a groan and a fake moan. I stare at him as he's not able to contain his laughter before starting to hit him with the notebook.

"Too bad you're not a good boy, hun."

For once, school ends up actually being nice and just because Frank and I were getting in the character sometimes and pissing people off. By lunch, he had pulled on some sunglasses and looked like the stupidest fucker while eating his sandwich and smudging more of the lipstick and fake blood around his lips. At some point, we had pretended to have a fight and pierce the other's chest with a pair of scissors just to squeeze a bag of fake blood at whoever walked by – mostly some of the jocks or plastics. So much fun.

The house is quiet when we arrive back at it, a couple hours after school ended, and we find out, later, a note from Frank's mom apologizing she can't be here during the rest of his birthday, though she's sure he'll have fun with me.

"Imma take a shower," I sigh, pointing upstairs.

"Sure," he hums, looking up from the note for a moment to smile at me.

Thankfully, I always leave some clothes at Frank's place because I'm here far too often and not always have the chance or disposition to go back home and grab some clothes. It doesn't prevent me from stealing his hoodie, however, and walking out of the bathroom without all of that sticky makeup or fake blood is the best thing ever. Later, Frank is the one to go take a shower while I take care of the food he had already started to prepare.

"Much better!" I raise my eyebrows at the sight of Frank with his hair back to normal and only a bit of black makeup smudges the underside of his eyes now.

"Y'know, I never said a single thing about how you looked," he mutters with his brow low, coming to lean against the counter, next to me, "still, you've been attacking me every chance you got!"

"Does it offend you?" I smile.

"No, but it still hurts!" He sniffles, a hand flat against his chest. "I know I'm too badass for you to handle, but you don't need to let it be that clear!"

I look at him from head to foot. "I hate you, y'know that?"

"Love you too, hun!" He grins and moves closer, cupping my face exaggeratedly to peck my cheek before we head upstairs with everything we need.

We turn the lights on to organize everything, soon sitting down against a pile of pillows and with food surrounding us, though most of it is on the bedside tables since Frank, mainly, gets extremely uncomfortable with it falling on the bed. It doesn't matter, though, since the food and half empty cans end up going forgotten halfway through the movie at the same time the chatter dies down and we watch The Evil Dead as if it was the first time.

Some funny part comes on – well, not exactly funny, but enough to make us chuckle quietly – and brings us back to reality, sighing and glancing at each other, adjusting our postures as we'd slid down the pillows.

Frank yawns.

"Already tired?" I tease, poking his shoulder.

"No." He pouts, crossing his arms over his chest. "Getting tired is for losers." He does glance at the clock on his bedside table, however, and the red glowing numbers say it's six something.

"You're my favorite loser, then." I smirk lightly, exhaling.

Frank's eyebrows knit together as he looks at me, but then rolls his eyes. "Well, duh, of course I am! Who else? I'm the best." He scoots closer until his head is leaning on my shoulder and I can't help but to smile.

"No, I am," I groan, arms wrapped around him.

"I am!" He glares and, at some point, we end up in a wrestling match, pushing each other around the mattress among laughter and curses, which comes to a stop when we start getting too tired and I just let Frank lie down on top of me, head on my chest, still watching the movie. "Do you like anyone, (y/n)?" he asks suddenly. "Like, got a crush?"

Random. Why does he want to know? I mean, I do have a crush, but telling him about it is difficult.

"Um, yeah, I guess, why?" I blink, startled when he suddenly brings himself up on his elbows to stare at me.

"I swear to God I'll hunt them down if you forget about me because of them, do you understand?" Frank presses his forehead to mine. "You're the only one I got, sometimes I'm so worried you'll even leave me for whatever reason."

"What?" I breathe a chuckle, though there's not exactly anything funny here. "Never in my right mind would I do that! And you can't hunt my crush down if my crush is actually you," I laugh in a sudden rush of confidence, which wears out awfully quickly, leaving me lying there and rethinking every life choice.

"Me?" Frank widens his eyes. At the lack of answer, he takes a hold of my collar, straddling my hips. "Did I hear it right? Please, (y/n), (n/n), soulmate? I'm your goddamn crush? For how long?"

I shake my head lightly, shrugging. "Months? A long time."

"And you just told me now?" He cries, forehead pressed to my shoulder. "Slow motherfucker."

"I didn't want you to leave me either, c'mon!" I sigh in defeat, running a hand through his hair. "I remember that time a girl confessed to you and you'd simply vanish whenever she showed up. What if that was with me? I'd not be able to live like this, y'know that."

"Y'know, yeah, seeing it from that point..." Frank shrugs, bringing himself up to face me again. "Still, I wouldn't avoid you like that! Dunno, but it doesn't matter now because you just relieved me of months of suffering. Looking at these pretty lips without being able to kiss it." He furrows his eyebrows, eyes on my lips. "Can I kiss you, tho? Now that we feel stupid for all these months. Damn. At least I feel."

I breathe a chuckle. "Of course! Do you think I wasn't dying to do it either?"

Next thing I know are Frank's lips pressed against mine softly, soon growing firm with confidence. His fingers run along my neck lightly, in a caring manner, dropping to trace my collarbones.

"Also," Frank breathes, pulling away; his face never moves farther than a couple of inches whilst he adjusts his position, lying down beside me on the mattress. "Maybe it's wrong to say and I've always tried to say it in a subtle manner, but–" his eyes meet mine, "–you've got the body of a goddess! Like, dunno, sometimes you comment about not having an 'ideal', skinny body, but you're just so perfect," he groans, wrapping his arms around me tightly.

"Frank!" I tap on his back lightly. It's not that I don't like what he said – no, damn, it sends my heart fluttering, this warmth taking over my chest –, but is it really the truth? I didn't think it was possible for anyone to tell me this.

"No, I'm telling the truth!" Frank grins. "Like, your thighs and all. I just want to squeeze and bite you! Not in a bad way, I mean." I must give him a funny look because of how flustered he grows, tongue playing with his lip ring as he looks away. "There's a lot to unpack, fuck, I thought it was obvious how I always sit there gazing at you and shit, but..."

"Likewise." I glare playfully, making him chuckle.

"Y'know–" Frank smiles lazily, "–this is the best birthday I've ever had, by far." He brushes his lips against mine softly, watching me through half lidded eyes. "Never knew you'd actually like me back. Never believed it was possible, to be honest."

"I never cogitated you like me," I breathe.

"Well, okay," he says, "we've already gotten through this. I think we should focus on now."

"I'm not the one who keeps bringing back past thoughts!" I chuckle at how he pouts, scowling funnily.

"Shut up, shut up, I get it!" Frank rolls his eyes and presses his lips to mine before I can say anything, having me smiling against the kiss until returning it, wrapping my arms around his neck to pull him closer. Now that we've finally kissed, keeping our lips off each others' feels almost impossible – letting go of each other feels almost impossible. "God fucking damnit," he groans under his breathe, moving to press kisses down my jaw, soon reaching my neck.

A sigh escapes my lips at the kisses, though it turns into quiet pleased sounds at the feeling of his teeth pulling at my skin and sometimes closing around it, sucking on it whilst all I can bring myself to do is tugging onto his hair. Suddenly, however, feeling his hands traveling down to my hips and squeezing them makes me gasp, probably reacting a bit more than I intended.

"What?" Frank pulls away at the same moment, eyes wide. "Did I do something wrong? Please– Damn, I'm so sorry!"

"N-No, no," I finally bring myself into speaking up, feeling my cheeks burn bright red. "I, um, I actually... liked it. A lot. Sorry if I scared you, I just wasn't expecting it. I don't mind, really," I insist as he continues looking at me with furrowed eyebrows.

"You sure?"

"Yeah!" I smile, bringing him for a quick kiss before he's trailing down my neck again.

Frank's hands go down my body, experimentally at first and then squeezing my hips again, receiving another reaction this time, including just a soft gasp as I push my hips up – a shiver runs down my spine with it, a nice one. Fuck.

"Damn..." Frank breathes, hands running down to my thighs then up again to slide under my shirt. "It's a bit early, maybe–" he shrugs, looking at me, "–but... is it okay if..."

Holy hell. "Of course," I say without thinking much – he continues to stare, so I nod.

"Fuck yeah," he mutters, lips against mine for a few seconds before he's pulling my shirt over my head and the expression on his face carries such admiration that I can't help but to feel embarrassed for a moment. He never lets me cover myself, nonetheless, hands flying to my waist to hold firmly onto it as he's pressing kisses from my stomach to my hip. "No, seriously–" he sits up again, "–how can someone be so perfect?" He seems to be talking mostly to himself, getting rid of his shirt.

"Dunno." I grin. "How does it feel to be so perfect, baby?"

Frank exhales shakily. "You'll be the death of me and I ain't even joking." He presses a kiss to my collarbone, starting to nibble down at the skin again, trailing down to my chest, lips sometimes lingering over my breasts – sure as hell he leaves a few marks behind, considering how invested he gets.

Something tells me he doesn't know what to focus on. His hands never stay in the same place for too long, going down my thighs then trailing up to my waistband, up my torso, and then he repeats it.

"C'mon," I mutter, placing his hands on my waistband. He's a bit hesitant, but quickly undoes the buttons and starts pulling it down – I help him, kicking the pants away in the end.

A string of curses slip past Frank's lips as he quickly gets rid of his jeans too and, when coming back, he kneels down between my legs this time, spreading them apart. Our lips are yet again locked in a kiss, different from the others, more heated up and urgent this time as we hold onto each other. I play with the hair on the back of his neck and tug onto it instead at the feeling of his hands around my ass, groping.

"Frank, damn," I breathe quietly for a second we pull apart and, opposite to earlier, he gets the hint and does it again, humming against my lips. Once he stops groping, his hands just run along my skin, up and down my body, sometimes lingering. The most lovesick look decorates his face when he pulls away. My heart.

I place my hands on Frank's shoulders as I sit up, changing our positions. He observes me with wide eyes and I smile at him before pressing kisses to his neck, leaving behind a hickey before I can go lower and lower until my fingers are around the waistband of his boxers and I pause, looking up at him, and continue after he nods.

Frank's already half hard, a breath hitching in his throat as, after discarding his boxers, I assume my previous position.

Even if it's not the first time I've done that, this nervousness still lies under my skin as I wrap a hand around him, pumping him lightly before wrapping my lips around the head experimentally. He breathes sharply.

Only halfway through it that I allow myself to look up at Frank, pausing for a moment after finding out he's been watching, propped up on his elbows, eyes focused on me and jaw slack, but I don't look away, hollowing my cheeks instead and watching him break under my gaze, letting go of all the tension for a second.

I repeat the motions a few times and pull away, licking up along the underside, around the tip, and he's suddenly pulling me away – eyes wide and face flushed this time.

Frank mumbles something I can't quite understand, but it doesn't really matter. He moves closer, both of us soon assuming the position we were in minutes ago, pressed against each other. Now, he removes my underwear and his hand slips between us, however.

Pleasure is sent ringing up my spine at the feeling of Frank's fingers slipping past my lips, quickly finding my clit and wasting no time on working his thumb on it while a couple of fingers tease my entrance. Moans just escape my throat easily after he breaks the kiss, mouthing his way until the inside of one of my thighs – he bites and sucks on the skin there. His tongue is suddenly there, then, against my clit, working around it before being replaced by his lips and my vision goes fucking blank when I can feel him sucking on it.

"Fuck," Frank curses once pulling away, moving to frantically rummage through the nightstand's drawer; I groan at the loss of touch, pushing my hips up into nothing.

Hearing the sound of foil being torn makes me understand what's happening, and I watch him rush to slip the condom on, giving us a moment to catch our breath before he's positioning himself, a hand on my hip whilst another holds himself up.

"Tell me if there's something wrong, okay?" he asks slowly, "I'll stop right away. Don't be afraid."

"Same to you," I say softly, cupping his face to pull him for a soft, quick kiss.

Frank smiles with a nod and looks down before I can feel him against my entrance, pushing in slowly. I wrap my arms around his shoulders tightly, feeling his chest vibrate against mine with the low moan coming from him, replaced by a sigh once he sinks in completely. He starts moving right away, hips jerking experimentally before attaining a heavy and slow pace which doesn't last long due to how needy we are already.

I gasp at how he thrusts in harder, wrapping my arms around his shoulders to hold him close and having my legs around his hips, instinctively.

Curses and praises are breathed into my ear among moans, somehow making the pleasure pool down in my lower stomach even more intensely, summed up to feeling his hands groping on my ass again, fingers sinking into the skin.

"You're just so perfect, (y/n)," he babbles, "and even better that now you're all mine."

Suppressing a louder moan turns out to be impossible at the feeling of Frank's hips reaching a certain angle and, soon, the answer I had in my slips away from my grasp and all there's left is just how good he feels. I travel a hand up to his hair, remembering how he reacted to it earlier, and tug on it in a form of response, though also wanting to hear how pathetically he moans at it.

"'M gonna cum," I manage to say before being cut off by a moan, arching my back.

"Me too, babe," he groans, "almost there."

Frank pauses, adjusting himself so a hand is under my thigh and another on the mattress for major support and his thrusts are suddenly harsher. I throw my head back at the same time, holding onto him tightly, and it doesn't take long for all the pleasure that had been building up so far to unravel at once – it apparently triggers the same on him, considering how tight his grasp gets whilst a higher pitched moan comes from him.

Coming down from the high, I feel almost numb, in a good way. Frank pulls away and I'm only aware of him when he's lying down next to me, both of us breathing heavily and unable to do anything aside from staring at the ceiling for a long moment.

"Damn, I love you so much, so much," he mumbles again.

I breathe a chuckle, feeling him cuddling up to me, arms wrapped around me. "And I love you, dumbass." I press a kiss to his head.

"My girlfriend now, right?" he asks. "Nevermind, you don't get to choose." He chuckles, though it quickly dies down. "Just kidding, okay? Tell me to and I'll fuck off."

I laugh, still breathless. "Of course I am. I didn't confess for nothing."

[clandestineloki]

Hiiii.... I was just wondering if you could write a Loki thing with something if like the reader was the Greek version of Hela? Like, firstborn of Hades and Persephone, except she and her younger brother actually get along? Maybe like... they were friends pre-Thor, and like, in Ragnarok, she and her brother help in the battle and offer the Asgardians a place in the Underworld?

[war flashbacks to literature review for greek mythology]

you're very much like your mother

goth, but sweet and very loving too

both your parents love you so much and show it (unlike a motherfucker ass whose name starts with z and ends with eus)

you know how to fight, but you won't unless very necessary

you can also go between earth and the underworld

which is how you met loki

he fell in love first

because who wouldn't?

you were wearing the prettiest gray gown he had ever seen

and norns you were absolutely beautiful

he wouldn't have believed you were the daughter of persephone if not for smoke around you that looked like a three-headed dog

"who's there?" you called out. loki froze in his tracks.

"i'm unarmed," he replied, raising his chin.

you turned to the source of the voice. "hello."

"h-hi," loki breathed out.

the smoke figure growled and put itself in a protective stance around you.

"cerberus, that's no way to greet a guest!" you flicked your wrist, and the smoke spiralled inwards and landed on a ring on your right hand, and you clasped it shut.

"i'm sorry about that," you meekly mumbled. "father says i can't leave the underworld without an eye on me."

"i'm not surprised," loki mused. "there are many a man who would like to keep your company."

you smiled. "you must be loki, god of mischief."

loki smirked, taking your hand and pressing a chaste kiss to your knuckles. "and you must be the radiant goddess of trust and redemption. pleased to meet you."

"the pleasure's all mine," you laugh bashfully.

and loki came to visit all the time

of course, hades was very skeptical (as he should be, because YOU'RE HIS DAUGHTER everyone has to go through the process of in-law troubles)

but he warmed up when loki began to prove his worth

persephone was charmed (she always told you to find someone like your father SHE'S SUCH A LOVELY WOMAN)

even MORE delighted when loki introduced her to frigga

TEA PARTIES WHILE COMPLAINING ABOUT GODDESS DUTIES SUPREMACY

so um fast forward to ragnarok

persephone's having a grand time with frigga in the underworld

sneaks loki in sometimes

hades kind of knew loki was dressed as odin

initially wanted to keep it a secret that loki was still alive

but persephone told you

and you kept it a secret too

hades was kind of impressed because somehow asgard was prospering

so fast forward to the battle of asgard

cerberus beat up all of hela's men RIP

you all won yay

and loki introduced you to thor

thor kind of knew already because WHY ELSE WOULD HIS BROTHER GO TO THE LITERAL LAND OF THE DEAD

and persephone offers the people of asgard a place in the underworld

[awkward silence]

"no, dears," your mother chuckles, "you're not going to die!"

collective sigh of relief

"we may need some guardians on the outside of the underworld," she explains.

"YES" thor booms.

loki also takes this to propose to you

AND YOU HAVE A COTTAGECORE WEDDING LIKE THE ONE IN MALEFICENT 2 KASJDKAJDADJA

pretty dynamic might write a smut for it :)) <33

[roanniom]

Happy Friday Issa! Today I am thinking about Paterson, and what it would be like to end up on his bus one day by happenstance. It would be impossible not be smitten at first sight. I can't stop picturing the way his eyes would just bore into ours when he catches us staring in the rearview mirror. The blush that spreads over him would be just unreal. 😍🥺💜 Thanks so much for sharing nyour imagines with us!

Lovely Claire, as you know I’ve been excited to get to this one. Partly because I love Pat with all my heart and partly because I looked forward to bringing such a beautiful idea to life in that calm Paterson style. I hope you like this little story <3

Three Stops, Five Regulars, and You

Word Count: 2,152

Warnings: Really just sweetness, the slightest angst from ~yearning~

Paterson drives the same route every day. He knows the people who get on, where they board, and where they disembark. The sweet old lady who gets her groceries at the corner store on Tuesdays. The recent emigrant from Nigeria who sits in the front and practices English with the local florist as they both commute to different jobs in the same strip mall. The high school baseball player who acts rowdy in the back of the bus with his teammates until the teammates get off on Maple Street and he remains on for eight more stops, always moving to sit shyly with a girl Paterson has gathered to be the boy’s old English tutor.

But never you.

When Paterson opens his folding doors and you walk in, he is immediately struck by your newness. The way the planes of your face reflect no familiarity back onto him unsettles Paterson as you pass him by to take your seat a few rows down. He inhales the scent that wafts in your wake, trying to place it but, as with your features, he draws a blank. Freesia? Gardenia? Paterson blinks at the expanse of windshield before him in an attempt to ground himself in the here and now.

It’s a Friday afternoon, almost early evening.

He’s on 5th and Potomac.

Three more stops till he’s done with his shift.

Done to go home to a microwaved meal and a comfortable couch.

Five more regulars to get to their destination.

And you.

Paterson looks up then into the rearview mirror only to meet those unfamiliar eyes. Beautiful eyes, he registers somewhere in the back of his short-circuiting brain. Eyes that take him in through the mirror. Appraising him. He wonders what they see in him, these eyes that can’t possibly know him any more than his know you.

“Hey Pat, we outta gas or something, buddy?”

The good-natured tease comes from Ollie, the auto mechanic, sitting in his usual seat in row six. This does nothing to stop Paterson from jumping a foot into the air and muttering his apologies before clunking the bus into gear.

It takes Paterson several minutes of silent driving before he works up the courage to glance at the rearview mirror again. He argues with himself internally before he does so.

You’re probably not even looking anymore. No, it’s much more likely you’ve become engaged in polite conversation with another passenger or pulled out a book or lost yourself looking out the window, taking in the outside world with those beautiful eyes…

Or, less likely but much more anxiety-inducing, you could still be looking. Looking at the lanky bus driver with the goofy ears who stared like an idiot instead of doing his job. He kicks himself at the thought of the way he’d gaped at you. Openly and so out of character.

What he should have done was averted his eyes when you’d entered, waited a respectable amount of time, and then peered back a few times to catch a glimpse. He could have taken in the curve of your jaw, the arch of your brow, the turn of your nose, all without detection from the comfortable anonymity of the driver’s seat. Gone home and written a poem or two about the ethereal creature who’d gotten lost and found herself on his bus route, a sprite or a fairy who would disappear tomorrow like some Freesia-scented vapor, perhaps never really there to start.

But no. He’d looked. And you’d looked.

And now he looks again.

His eyes dart back to the road immediately and his pulse races.

You were looking.

Paterson takes a few deep breaths and minds a stop sign before he hazards a glance again.

Yes. Still looking.

But this time he notices the smile on your face. The lips he hadn’t noticed, being so far below your eyes as they were, your eyes which had been just about as far as he had gotten to this point. The smile is soft but amused. Your hand lifts up in a small wave and Paterson feels himself heat up all the way down to his sensible shoes. His ears burn and he brings his eyes back to the road by force of habit and in order to do his job of steering this bus full of people but for absolutely no other reason. Because now he has two different things that require his attention – your eyes and your lips. Both deserving of equal consideration.

When his eyes revisit the road he realizes the next stop is upon him. When the bus pulls to a halt and deflates down steadily to allow passengers to climb out, Pat counts the seconds with his heartbeat. Wondering if this is your stop. Knowing which stop it is for all other riders but you. Knowing Mr. McKinney will get off to see his nephew and that the kind goth boy whose name he doesn’t know is off to the library with music blaring in his ears. Paterson nods to each of them as they pass, but does not look up to see them, opting instead to stare straight ahead.

When his peripheral vision doesn’t show him your retreating figure Paterson looks up to find you still in your seat, this time sitting lower. More comfortable. But still looking. Still smiling.

Involuntarily, Paterson feels a smile spread across his own face. He closes the folding doors and shifts back into gear.

Two more stops and three more passengers.

And you.

As Paterson navigates his way into the middle lane to avoid construction, he tries to settle his racing thoughts. He’s confused by this reaction, mental, physical and otherwise. It’s not like he’s never had a pretty passenger before.

So why does your face look like nobody he’s ever seen but everything he’s ever looked for?

“What’s your favorite thing about being a bus driver?”

Paterson inhales sharply and he jerks his head around at the unfamiliar voice to see that you are now sitting in the seat directly behind him. Your smile larger than ever.

Paterson swallows thickly, searching for the first words best to say to you.

“Passengers shouldn’t move about while we’re in motion.”

Wrong words.

“So is it that? The authority?” you joke, your smile becoming more lopsided, Paterson’s thankful to be able to see. Even with you right behind him he can still see you in the rearview mirror.

“No! No I didn’t mean to…I mean it’s really not that big…we’re only going 30 –” Paterson’s stuttering is cut off by your laugh.

“Ok if not that then what is it?”

“Um, what is what?” Paterson asks, looking back up after yielding to a bicyclist.

“What’s your favorite thing about being a bus driver?”

“Oh.” Paterson looks back at the road.

He’s never really thought of it. Mainly because nobody had ever asked it before, so he hadn’t bothered to ask it of himself. But it only takes another second of thought before he has his answer.

“It’s a weird limbo.”

“Come again?” Judging by your expression this was clearly not an answer you’d anticipated.

“Being a bus driver you are part of people’s daily lives. You go with them to work, you take them home after a long day. You see them with their friends and family. Or alone.”

“I’m alone,” you point out with a nod. It’s a simple statement, as if corroborating his assessment. Paterson grins and nods.

“Exactly, you’re alone. It’s very personal, in a way. Being there for these moments in between where they are coming from and where they’re going.”

“Intimate?” you offer. Paterson feels his throat go dry as he nods again.

“Yes. Intimate.”

“But you called it limbo?”

“Well it might be intimate, but it’s from a distance. A bus driver is only a small part of someone’s day, but my passengers are my day.”

“Oh,” you exclaim, voice softer than before. “I guess I never thought about it that way.”

The next stop, the penultimate one, comes into view and Paterson eases to bus to halt. A single mother known for jogging around the park in the evenings bids Paterson good night and Ollie claps him on the back as he heads out for dinner with his kids. Upon their exit, Paterson’s eyes seek out yours in the mirror once more. Wondering again if this is the place where you get off.

You lean against the back of your chair. Still very much seated.

Still very much a passenger.

It is then, as Paterson closes the folding doors once more, that he realizes the rest of the bus is empty. This startles him, as usually there is one more regular on the bus for this last upcoming stop. A man, very quiet and not unlike himself. Though Paterson doesn’t know much about him, he’s always wondered just how similar they are. Wondered if the man who enters a residential complex across the street from this last stop also has an empty apartment waiting from him. A lukewarm meal and a cold bed.

Paterson spares a moment to wonder where the man is, feeling a tinge of hope burn through the usual pity – perhaps the man is not alone, wherever he is, and perhaps tonight his dinner will be hot.

The folding doors hiss as they close for the second to last time tonight and Paterson pulls back into traffic. A glance in the rearview mirror reminds him that, not only are you still there, but that the absence of his final regular means that you two are very much alone.

The thought makes blood pound in his ears and he finds his eyes darting between the road and the mirror, not wanting to miss a second of whatever you may do, whatever you may say.

And you don’t make him wait long.

“That man called you Pat earlier,” you say in that lilting voice. “Is your name Patrick?”

“Paterson.” He says it wearily, bracing himself for the inevitable exclamation sure to come about how his name couldn’t possibly be what he says it is because no, that’s the name of the town.

Instead he sees you nod in the mirror as if this is the most rational name he could have given. Of course his name is Paterson.

The silence that follows is heavy with a lot of things, chief among them the things he wishes he could bring himself to say. Questions mainly, ones to counter the questions you’ve lobbed at him. After a block passes he opts for a simple one.

“What do you like best about being a bus passenger?” The question is timid and he hates himself for it, but the sound of your laugh is an pleasantly unexpected reward.

“I like the bus drivers.”

Paterson laughs with you then.

“Now you’re making fun of me.”

“No, I’m not!” you say with mock offense. Paterson flexes his fingers on the steering wheel, starting to feel them tingle. Probably a symptom of a long day of driving.

Or a symptom of you.

“Ok maybe you’re not making fun of me, but there’s no way that’s your answer.”

“You’re right, maybe it’s not the bus drivers,” you say then, leaning forward to rest your chin on your arms as they fold on top of the ledge separating the first row from the driver’s seat. Paterson can practically hear your breath as you speak your next words. “Maybe I just like you.”

If Paterson hadn’t already been pulling up to the final stop he’s pretty sure he would have slammed on the breaks. When the bus eases into motionlessness, Paterson’s hand automatically opens the folding doors, something he probably wouldn’t have thought to do if the action wasn’t so tied to muscle memory at this point.

Paterson’s mind is reeling. He needs to ask you out, or at least as you your name.

But his tongue is tied and you’re standing up and reaching for your bag.

You step down the one step that brings you to the level of the driver’s seat and he gets another good look at you, eyes skittering up and down in a vain attempt to take in every detail incase this was both his first and last chance.

“Good night!” you say cheerily as you move to the door.

Paterson’s heart is sinking faster than the hydraulics on his bus when suddenly you turn around once more, almost as an after thought.

“Oh and Paterson? You were my day.”

And with that you step into the night.

Perhaps to continued tangibility.

Perhaps to vaporize into thin air.

He’s not sure which possibility scares him more.

Paterson allows himself to sit still for a few more moments, not bothering to close the folding doors so quickly this time. Allowing the cool air to flow in. Air that contains the remnants, and potential, of you.

~*~

Tagging some lovely people (please let me know if you’d like to be tagged or untagged in future work!) @mariesackler @direnightshade @safarigirlsp @sacklerscumrag @paper-in-ashes-fanfiction @historyandfandoms50 @clydesfavoritegirl @wayward-rose @hopeamarsu @thegreenmatt @barbers-glimmerin-darlin @finn-ray-nal-beads @fizzywoohoo @maybe-your-left @aliveandlonely @han-not-solo @morby @emeraldsiren20 @maryforyou @aloneandsleepless @jynzandtonic @renmaulxo

(AND PLEASE LET ME KNOW IF YOU ARE GETTING NOTIFIED ABOUT THIS TAG, TUMBLR HAS BEEN WEIRD LATELY that is all, love you guys <3)

[staytiny-angel]

Grace and Country 2/5

Rating: M

Pairing: 'Hangman' Adam Page/F!OC, One-Sided Kenny Omega/F!OC

Warnings: Canon-Typical Violence, Harrassment.

Co-Written with @lilmissriottbliss

Taglist - @moxleyunstable, @axelwolf8109

Summary: Ava and Adam go on that date, it goes about you'd expect with the Dark Order involved, Things with Kenny come to a head.

"Violet!"

"Ava? Mon Cher Smackdown is about to start why are you screaming?"

Violet gave Finn a look before putting her friend on speaker "Mon Roi is here too, what has you so excited?"

"ADAM ASKED ME OUT ON A DATE!" The younger woman yelled

Ava could hear Violet cursing in French from a small distance. “Really? That’s amazing! Give me details now!”

“I lost my phone and he found it near your adopted brother and then Kenny was annoying me again so he covered for me by saying we were going on a date so we’re actually going on one!”

“I’m so happy for you!”

“Could you do me a solid?” Ava asked

Of course darling," Violet agreed

"Could you guys not tell the big boss?" Ava begged "You know I love Seth to death, he's my dad shaped person but he wasn't happy about this whole AEW deal and he'll be even less happy to know I'm going out with one of their biggest stars"

Violet and Finn silently looked at each other before agreeing to the younger woman's request 

"We have you covered darlin" Finn said

"What are you going to do about Omega?I'm starting to worry. He's really not taking no for an answer"

“I honestly don’t know” Violet handed Finn her phone, taking out the one meant to contact family. “I think she’s going to threaten Malachi into watching over you” Finn laughed.

Ava sighed in relief. While Malachi Black, formerly Aleister to Violet, was dark and broody, he did scare Kenny with a simple stare.

“So how’s Mox doing?” Violet asked

"Good, he got Omega off my back last night at Dynamite, threatened him with Ruby." Ava said "He said something about promising Seth to look out for me?"

"Seth called him and Miro when you decided to go to AEW." Finn explained 

"Called in a couple of favors. You are the baby."

Ava rolled her eyes even though the couple couldn't see her "You've got to be kidding. I can take care of myself"

“We know you can take care of yourself, Seth has a overprotective complex” 

Ava sighed but didn’t disagree. “We got to go now, see you tomorrow!” Violet hung up.

Ava turned off her phone, seeing a text from Kenny. Rolling her eyes she deleted it. “Is he ever gonna get the point?” she asked herself before flopping on her hotel bed with a sigh. He thoughts turning to the next day and the date she'd been dreaming of for years. 

-Next Day-

She met Adam outside a café, the cowboy looking handsome in normal street clothes and without a certain purple and black group shadowing him.

“Wow, you look great” He said. As she grinned and twirled once, showing off the chic black suit she'd chosen for their date. 

“Hope you don’t mind but I invited Violet and Finn just in case your friends crash this”

Adam laughed. “They probably will ”

Inside the cafe, Finn and Violet were waiting at a four person table, surprisingly without their daughter in tow.

"Where's my honey bunches?" Ava said with a pout, that Adam found adorable

"Becky and Seth have her" Finn explained "Shes having a playdate"

“Next time you bring her” Ava pointed. Finn raised his hands and laughed. Violet slid over a black coffee to Adam. 

He accepted it with a smile. “So you’re both going after the top titles in Smackdown” he grinned.

“Yup!” Finn grinned. “It was fun in NXT but I wasn’t spending another week without my husband there” Ava sighed.

“It’s harder to get a title shot in AEW, I have no idea how to get to Britt”

“I lost the chance to be the inaugural champ because someone thought an ass deserved it” Adam muttered.

“Adam I think your shadows are here” Violet pointed to a booth in the corner

Sure enough, the purple and black clad Dark Order filled 2 corner booths, trying and failing to be inconspicuous.

"Oh god" Adam murmured "I'm so sorry, I shouldn't have told them where we were going"

"They really care about you" Ava smiled at Adam causing that feeling to flutter in his chest again.

"You may not, have been the first AEW champion but you've got a shot at Kenny at All Out" Finn says

"Sure do" Adam says "I can't wait, I've owed Kenny an ass whipping for a while now"

“Fucking creep” Ava rolled her eyes. “How’s Paige?”

“You don’t know that from Mox?” Violet raised an eyebrow. Ava shook her head

“She’s ok, doing wonders with her makeup. Her and Sonya are planning a wedding”

Ava nodded. “Sorry about the Kingdom disbanding” 

Finn rolled his eyes. “Of course Vince brings up Shotzi and us but doesn’t want Kyle, Millie, Priscilla or Jordan”

Adam and Ava share a smile knowing while AEW wasn't a paradise by any means…it wasn't run by Vince. 

A loud bang sounded from the back of the restaurant and every turned to see one of the corner tables flipped on its side as John Silver looked around sheepishly. 

Adam dropped his head in his hands as Ava giggled "I'm sorry, I'm gonna go uh…handle this" he said rising from his seat and heading toward the back.

"They are quite the band of misfits aren't they?" Violet said as she tried not to laugh as they watched Adam easily lift the table back in place and start seemingly scolding them for crashing their double date.

"They love him, and with the entire….mess with the Elite…their very overprotective." Ava explained

“Reminds me of Seth” Violet said. Ava’s eyes widened.

“It totally is!” Finn laughed as Adam came back and sat down.

“They swear it’s just a coincidence they all wanted to come here on the same day and time as my date”

Violet flipped her hair and put on her flirty voice. “So this a date?

Adam blushed hard. “Um…well, it’s definitely not a…friend thing…we’re not friends. I mean we are friends!, but I want to be more then friends!" 

Ava blushed as she watched Adam flounder under Violet's question 

"Leave him alone, mo chroi" Finn finally rescued the younger man from his wife. 

“I was just being a good friend” Violet smirked.

Adam took a breath. “I don’t know why but I have a thing for goth people”

Ava looked at Violet.

“Really? Is that why you went to the Dark Order?”

“Honestly? Kenny ruined tag teams for me. The Bullet Club went to shit after you were kicked out”  

Finn’s eye twitched, remembering how the Young Bucks fucked him over.

“The Bullet Club is nothing to me now. They ruined it!”

“The Elite’s worse, nothing but kissing Kenny’s ass, apparently he was looking to go to Impact and take their top title”

“Thank god the old man bought them, Impact might have been the worse part of my career but AEW would have ruined them” Violet sipped her ice coffee.

Adam sighed.

“I don’t know what happened. One minute he was my brother, now he’s a stranger” Adam said quietly as Ava rubbed his back

"Its okay, your going to take the AEW title from him at All Out." Ava consoled him.

The 2 couples finished their meal and left the restuarant, Finn and Violet heading to the arena to get ready for Smackdown, and Ava and Adam walking though the city streets enjoying each other's company. 

"This has been great" Ava says as they finally end up back at the hotel

"We'll have to do it again sometime" Adam replied causing Ava to blush again.

"Maybe next time….just the two of us?" He asked softly

“No demon and vampires. No Dark Order” Ava agreed. Adam hugged her.

“Adam!” Evil Uno yelled. The pair looked at the stable. Anna walked over. “Well, the date was a success so Alex made you this” She handed a black jacket to Ava. It had a purple rose stitched in the back.

“Wow, Alex’s a suckup” Adam joked. “I’m totally wearing this next week” Anna smiled.

“C’mon Adam, before the idiots start screaming” 

He rolled his eyes but hugged Ava goodbye, kissing her hair before walking away.

The Next Week 

After spending the weekend and into the next week bouncing between elation over her successful date with Adam (including spending a hefty amount of time texting back and forth with the cowboy) and annoyance that Kenny just would not stop texting and calling, it was finally Wednesday and time for that weeks episode of Dynamite, at which Ava had a match against Nyla Rose.

 

Over the past few days she had gone hunting for more appropriate gear to compliment her new jacket and was now wearing black leather shorts with purple accents and a purple and black corset top. 

"Don't you look like a full fledged member of the misfit society, I really thought you'd have better taste Sweetheart" Kenny said walking up to her, the Young Bucks flanking him

“I’ve liked purple and black before the Dark Order existed” Ava snapped.

Kenny grabbed her arm. “Let go!”

“I just want what’s best for you” Kenny said fiercely 

“HEY!” Darby Allin hit Kenny with a skateboard.

“She’s said no to you for weeks now, get lost!” He roared, Ava seeing why Mox had pretty much adopted him.

Kenny looked panicked and all but ran. The Bucks, glaring at her as the followed

“Thanks” Ava said to Darby. “I hate that fucker”

"Join the club" Darby replied 

Later that night after beating Nyla Rose, Ava was celebrating in the ring when Kenny's music hit and The Elite surrounded the ring. 

"I really tried to do this in private Ava, baby but you just won't listen to me, you'd rather hang out with those losers instead of being part of The Elite"

“I. Am. Not. Your. Baby!” Ava screamed,.

Kenny stepped in, smirking. “Just accept the date”

The crowd began chanting variations of yes and no. 

Then the music of the Dark Order hit, Adam leading the stable to a beat down. Colt tackled Kenny, Adam waving sarcastically at him before going over to Ava, "You okay Darlin?"

"Yeah, fucking asshole. Why won't he leave me alone" 

"Ava, Ava!" Kenny panted, "I have a deal for you, since you and the drunk, seem so close lately, Next week….you and Adam against me and Britt Baker. You win, you get a title shot at All Out. You two lose, Cowboy loses his shot, and you go out with me"

Ava looked at Adam, who was clenching his jaw. Anna and Evil Uno nodded their heads.

Ava grabbed a mic. “We accept! And let’s raise the stakes!!! If we win and move on to kick you asses at All Out, you leave me the fuck alone!” 

Kenny gulped "Done!"

“I’ll add to that!” Adam yelled. “When I kick your ass, you don’t get to have a rematch as long as I’m champion. Let someone else get an opportunity”

"Deal!" Kenny said cockily "It doesn't matter anyway "You two are gonna lose and when you do...not only will Adam never get a shot at the AEW Championship,  Ava...baby...your all mine" 

[myvelouri]

Did I write about Sam? I think so, yeah she said she appreciates me, and it took her a while to warm up to me

She even asked if I was off tomorrow and said to come in and dab with her lol, which I think means smoke a blunt but yeah. She was really treating me like a whole full human being.

I think cause, well, she's the waitress that works there but she surprised us at Whataburger cause she saw me Ronnie and Hector chillin there. She freaked me out lol. But she saw me get some customers at the bar treating me with racism or sometimes calling me gay. I don't know if that's what did it but she thought of me as so sweet now. Cause even during the fight I accidentally dropped the drink on her she was trying to serve. It's okay, it was riled up and a lot of people. I grabbed onto her and told her to stop me. And I remember that. After it ended I went up to her alone and said "hey, I'm sorry I dropped that on you, I.." and she cut me off and said "omg you're so sweet, no, it's totally fine" and I said "okay" and walked away.

It was a wild night, that one.

But yeah so I did go see Sam the day after but she was busy at work. She didn't smoke with me at all. She was tired I suppose. Idk though. It's okay

I mean people do that. Ronnie said he was gonna text me to hang tonight but he didn't. So I know people do that, you know?

I love Ronnie. He actually told me "I was going to jump into that fight if that guy started hitting only you" and I was like wow I love you man. Idk how we got to be decent friends but I appreciate him

I'm a mostly loving and trusting person and no one sees that right away (anymore) because I look a certain way I assume.

Okay anyway, back to that night at Whataburger. She like surprised us. Hector and Ronnie left. That one dude working at Whataburger tried to get with Sam so much that Sam asked me to sneak her out. Lmao we did when the guy wasn't looking but we also refilled our drinks LOL. Omfg she was saying I should work with her, she was saying she's emo as fuck too. I am actually able to talk to her for a long time. Good chemistry. She a goof. Omfg right, she has a very goth name, it's so pretty, ffs her name is "Raven" and her last name is equally as goth. And she was telling Ronnie and Hector (before they left) how someone said something she LOVED which was "they said my name is like, um, those books," and I said "lmao SOMEBODY? girl, I said that hahahahaha" "fuckin, 'somebody'" and I was teasing her, like, it was really funny hahaha. And the book series was "a series of unfortunate events" yeah, Sam is very baudelaire. I'm somewhat well cultured and I knew other thing she has with her that one time. Like I said, I gave good Chemistry with her. And now she's open to me. I can't believe that happened. At the same time I'm really sad that this whooooole time I knew her she didn't really like me, up until now. I guess... I guess it took her a while to get to know me just by watching me at the bar and seeing me deal with many situations. As well as being sweet to her most of the time. I don't know. I joke with her a lot too, I tease her. I did this knowing that she wasn't into me. I just liked her as a friend I get to be goofy with. You have to realize I grew up like this, being the funny one, being the goofy asshole with many friends and girls, just having a good ass time laughing. I'm very fun! And so, yeah man, I liked messing with her. So I'm sad that she didn't like me right away like people used to. I don't know. I think my appearance is different and causing some issues here. I used to be more adorable. It is confusing to explain. It would take long so I won't do it here right now.

But yeah me and Sam escaped Whataburger and talked in the parking lot forever. She said the fact that she's asking if I'm off tomorrow or actually trying means that she sees me as someone real, and said she appreciates me. It warms my heart. But I selfishly am still bitter that I wasn't appreciated earlier? Not in regards to her specifically, but that this has been happening to me a lot recently? Ppl not liking me and shit? So yeah, she warmed my heart a lot. I told her "wow, well I'm glad you see that now, a lot of people don't see that in me anymore" she thinks I'm really sweet.

I don't know. During that fight at the bar with the homophobia piece of shit, I bumped into her and was still able to have clarity even in my drunkenness to aid her immediately, and I became soft so quick and said "I'm so sorry Sam, are you okay? I didn't mean to touch you there, I didn't mean to drop that on you" i forgot to mention that when that happened, and I had her hold me, because of the bar fight I was in, that I accidentally also grabbed her breast, not grab, it wasn't on purpose, I was riled up, wasn't even LOOKING, I thought it was her torso or arm, because I trust her you know? And yes after I did that I immediately said omg I'm.so sorry I didn't mean to touch you there... She understood completely.

And also as we joked while in Whataburger before we left, or escaped hahaha, I said "okay let's go babe" and I quickly laughed and said "lol wtf I just called you babe" and she laughed, and she was into that too. Can't remember her joke but she played along hahaha maybe called me honey or something. Fucking dork, lol.

I think it's so funny that she ran into us at Whataburger. Perfect timing. Cause me Ronnie, and Hector were at Steve's place smoking and drinking. For a whiiiiile. And we got hungry so we left to eat. What were the odds Sam was driving by Whataburger that moment we were inside already. And she saw us. Yeah haha she said she saw us so solhe decided to come in

I should ask her if she wants to watch the joker with me. I'd like to see it with somebody

I showed her the kitten I rescued! She knows about it all. She helped me out by telling me stuff about it

Ahhh

Yeah guys the girl who's snap I got last night? Yeah she uh, never added me back. That's another L for me.

I'm not weird or creepy. I don't know why I think that. Maybe I am now. I just want to die. This is all so much and this ain't even half of what I deal with. There's shit I deal with so heavy that I don't even post here. I mainly post about relationships and friendships here along with dealing with that while having depression.

But I'm not okay. I hate myself but I love myself, but I dislike myself a lot more. The parts I love, I wish were more amplified..

I need money. I should just call into work tomorrow

I'll be in bed all night tonight, listening to music

Idk why that girl never added me back. She told me she was gonna just chill all day today too. And I told her that's totally fine, we can do something anytime. It's nice to meet you, REALLY love your style!

And the way she looked at me with those "I think you're so fucking cute" eyes confused me. Usually you can tell you know? I can always tell when a girl thinks I'm cute. But I've been off now. So off. Literally no girl likes me anymore

I think I've become old and ugly

Lonely, weird and lost.

I miss many things from life. I want many things too. I still do. If not, then I just want death. Being alive while wanting things so badly and never getting them is torture... Especially when the things you desire are things that everyone already has and takes for granted. You don't know, you just don't know

I'm so hurt that this is my life

I don't think I deserved this... I don't think anyone deserved this