#you are the only option and you have to keep going and you can but. at what personal cost?
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Cramp Simulator
LADS Men and a cramp simulator. This is how I imagine they would handle it.
A/N: I’ve gotten many requests for a cramp simulator so this is for those who wanna torture their man hehe
𝚉𝚊𝚢𝚗𝚎
[Before]
Of course he is berating you with questions. Where did you get this? why do you want him to do this? Will this have long lasting effects?
Believes you when you say your cramps are bad so he’s having a hard time understanding why you want to cause him immense pain
Agrees anyway because he will always do whatever you want him to do
[During]
This would be one of the rare moments you see Zayne break his calm cool and collected composure
“Are you sure you’re not having a heart attack every month?” He’s leaning on any surface he can find long after you’ve taken the simulator off of him
I imagine he has a high pain tolerance, but this was too much “You can turn it off now” you turn it up. “My love please turn it off” red in the face sweating and hands are shaking
[After]
You gave him your heating pad to help with the lingering pain “I was unaware of what you were dealing with every month”
Prepare to be pampered every time you get your period now; he's stocking up all your feminine products, tea, heating pads, painkillers, and your favorite foods and snacks
Monitors your heart closely during the week because he's worried you might have a heart attack
Brings up the option of medical grade painkillers, but immediately changes his mind because he doesn’t want you getting addicted
“Next time you start you period just take the week off” insists you stay home and let him take care of you, bringing you tea and rubbing your stomach
𝚁𝚊𝚏𝚊𝚢𝚎𝚕
[Before]
Overconfident to start — he can sense when you’re not feeling well, but can’t sense your cramp pain he just knows you’re not okay
Believes you when you say your cramps are bad, but "there’s no way they’re that bad" he has a high pain tolerance so “this will be a piece of cake turn it up”
[During]
Trying to hide the grimace on his face when he feels the first ‘cramp’ “Keep going?” “Yea this is nothing” he’s already sweating
Screaming, whining, crying and damn near throwing up “I’m dying there’s no way im not dying I see the light” “You’re not dying” “YES I AM”
“This is what you go through? No wonder you’re so mean” “I was being nice this is what I actually feel” you turn it up and he throws himself on the floor “I’M SORRY I’M SORRY TURN IT OFF PLEASE” gasping for air as he rolls around
[After]
Leaves you little snacks and gifts outside the door whenever you get your period now
Has never asked “Is it really that bad?” again because he knows the answer now; gets pains just thinking about it
Had to go lay down and take a nap after you took the simulator off of him.
Stocks up on heating pads and rubs your stomach and back religiously now
𝚇𝚊𝚟𝚒𝚎𝚛
[Before]
Isn’t nervous, but also isn't excited “I’m ready”
Is only doing this because you promised him hotpot afterwards
“You’re no stranger to pain” “Im not a masochist” “Debatable”
[During]
The pain was so bad that it pissed him off “This is complete bullshit” “I’m not interested in continuing this turn it off please”
When you turn it up so show him what you actually experience he’s kneeling at your feet begging you to turn it off “My Star please I understand please end this”
Accidentally grips whatever is near him so hard he breaks it
sweating, red in the face with tears in his eyes
[After]
Nurse Xavier now
Whenever you get your period he’s making you lay down and take it easy all week.
Is helping you in and out of bed
Leaves either a tampon or fresh underwear with a pad already lined in it on the counter for you when you get out of the shower
Loves these weeks now because he can nap with you as much as he wants
Carries you everywhere “Xav I promise I can walk” “With cramps as horrendous as those? You really are superwoman”
𝚂𝚢𝚕𝚞𝚜
[Before]
Nonchalant as always has almost a bored expression
“I still feel pain Princess, but I'll indulge you”
You tell him to sit down, but he opts to stand
"You shot and stabbed me before I can handle this" "I scratched you" "You stabbed me clear through the chest" "What?" "What."
[During]
Panting and red in the face does his best to try and handle the pain
Breathing heavily and doubled over leaning against the nearest surface he can find
“Okay okay thats enough” brought him to knees once again “I thought you could handle pain?” “That does not mean I enjoy it”
Has to sit down for a while completely still like a statue after that
[After]
Already pampered you during your periods, but he’s upped it now
Literally tracks your cycle and makes sure he’s always nearby incase it comes early
Wants you to stay with him the entire time “I need to go to work Sylus” “No you don’t you need to rest”
Makes a nesting bed for you and is at your beckoned call
#love and deepspace#sylus love and deepspace#sylus#lads#love and deepspace sylus#lnds sylus#lads rafayel#lads xavier#lads zayne#lads sylus#lnds#sylus lnds#lnds xavier#lnds rafayel#lnds zayne#love and deepspace zayne#love and deepspace xavier#love and deepspace rafayel#xavier love and deepspace#zayne love and deepspace#rafayel love and deepspace#l&ds#l&ds sylus#l&ds rafayel#l&ds xavier#l&ds zayne#nikaaaaimagine
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Yeah. At 19, I was finally diagnosed with autism and as unable to live independently without years of occupational therapy and my mother said "fuck that" and threw me out of the house two days later. She'd fought the doctors my entire life to stopbe from being diagnosed, because then that would mean there was something "wrong" with me.
I was homeless for over a year. I'm no longer homeless, mostly due to getting very very lucky with circumstances outside my control (like the fact that I was young enough and had been homeless long enough while continuing to take classes at the local community college to qualify for a government grant for Unaccompanied Homeless Youth, which allowed me to get an apartment. And i was only able to take classes because I was poor enough that the classes were free, and because i had a broken laptop and it never got stolen AND i already knew how to fix computers so I was about to Franken-Computer it into it being and staying at least slightly usable AND the fact that the nearest Starbucks was understanding and didn't throw me out or call the cops when I spent hours in there to do coursework), so my mother takes this as a win. Obviously, the doctor must have been wrong because when I was forced to sink or swim, I've stayed alive (very literally in this case).
I would argue that even now, going on a decade later, I'm not so much "living on my own" as I am "barely surviving", but I try to make it very clear, both to her and to people I tell this story to, that the problem with "Sink or Swim" is that people who sink fucking DROWN.
Because even as someone who was forced, and who managed to just barely keep my head above the water... I'm a very staunch opponent to the idea of Sink or Swim. What I had to live through was horrible, and I wouldn't wish it on anyone else. But not only that, I was very acutely aware that my only options were to figure it out or to quite literally Die.
As someone who survived the extreme of the other side of this coin that OP is talking about... the idea that I or anyone else could manage to survive such circumstances and then turn around and insist that the ends justify the means is both baffling and appalling to me, though I know that it very much happens. I cannot see it as anything other than "I suffered, so you should have to suffer too." It's awful to be on either side of this coin, and if you think it's okay for force people to Sink or Swim, whether you've been in that situation or not, than you can fuck right off with that shit.
Side note, I'm someone with support needs on the higher end of medium. I still can't manage to brush my teeth independently, and I don't manage to feed myself consistently, though I at least manage to do it often enough to get enough calories in me to stay alive (and that's ignoring anything other than calories that make up a healthy and balanced diet, because that's not an option for me. It's eat whatever junk food I manage to get into my my mouth or starve). I have to rely on schedules, because my brain doesn't really understand what hunger feels like. I just eventually feel like I'm going to throw up, and if I'm lucky, my brain figures out that I haven't eaten in all day and that's probably why. But there are days when, even if you put a plate of food in front of me, it wouldn't occur to me to eat it. I will just sit there and stare at it (or into space) without outside promoting to eat. I maybe manage to take out the trash or do laundry every two weeks if I lucky, and sometimes it's only once a month, or less. I have plastic bottles that haven't been taken out in at least six months, and probably closer to a year. Perhaps the only reason I can see the other side of this coin is because I basically live as close to edge as is physically possible without going over the edge, but I really hope that's not it. I don't think people should have to be constantly teetering on the knife-edge of this reality to understand that It's Really Fucking Bad to force people to Sink or Swim, or as I prefer to call it, Survive Or Die.
I don’t think people understand how it is to have been behind on EVERY milestone. Learning how to walk? Late. Learning to read? Late. Learning to use the bathroom independently? Late. Every single milestone was late.
And when you have this, people ask questions. People bully you. Why can’t you shower by yourself at 9,10,15,20? Why can’t you brush your teeth independently and frequently? Why can’t you tie your shoes? Why can’t you do math? Why can’t you do this, or that.
And then there’s the people on social media. “Well I was forced to.” “Well I didn’t have a choice” and that’s understandable and completely valid, but there are people that no matter how much you force them, or neglect them so they “figure it out” they won’t “figure it out”. They’ll die. They’ll starve. They’ll not bathe and be dirty.
Higher support needs people don’t just “figure it out” our brains are wired differently. Our brains don’t get that we HAVE to do these things just to survive. So we don’t. And that sucks.
It’s disheartening to constantly hear people say “well i was forced to” because so was I!! I was forced to do things too! I was neglected too! And guess what? I still didn’t do those things. I STILL wasn’t able to meet those milestones.
The big one that I see is “well I’m forced to talk.” And I get that, but me, a person that’s nonverbal, can’t be forced to talk. No matter if I’m neglected, no matter if my device is taken away or I have no way of communication. I still wouldn’t be able to talk. I CANNOT force myself to talk. Get that through your heads. This is my reality, and although yours sucked there are still some people who cannot do things, and saying that they could if they were “forced” is invalidating of them.
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You’re my ideal type
Summary: A video from a year ago of Oscar talking about his ideal type went viral, making his fans wonder why he chose his girlfriend. This leaves y/n with a lot of questions herself .
Note: First time writing for Oscar! I kinda went with the flow. Let me know what you think! 😌
Reader x Oscar Piastri
Genre: fluff/angst
It was a beautiful, sunny day in Monaco. I was out with two of my friends, enjoying brunch together and soaking up the good vibes.
We spent hours talking, laughing, and joking around—overall, it was a fantastic time.
Afterward, we decided to go for a stroll. That’s when we stumbled upon a gorgeous spot with an incredible view. For girls, that can only mean one thing: a photo session. And, of course, we took full advantage.
We snapped countless pictures of each other—exactly what I needed. I’d been wanting to update my Instagram feed, and I knew Oscar would appreciate a few of these too. A win-win situation if you ask me.
Hours later, we decided to head home. Parting ways was bittersweet, but we all had things to do.
When I finally arrived at the place Oscar and I shared, I immediately went inside, feeling my social battery completely drained.
I glanced at the clock and sighed. There were still a few hours to go before Oscar would be home. Feeling a little bored, I decided to tackle some household chores to pass the time.
Eventually, I finished everything and switched to full-on "bed rotting" mode. As I scrolled mindlessly on my phone, I remembered the stunning photos we’d taken earlier.
Sitting up, I started going through them, carefully picking out the best ones to upload to Instagram.
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yourusername Days like these ☀️💐
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oscarpiastri Pretties girl ❤️ by author
alexandrasaintmleux Gorgeous ❣️
yourusername Says you 💋
f1_dailylvr81 She's so girly coded love it 💅
fashionistaformula I can't be the only one thinking about that one interview of Oscar?
paistryln481 You're not alone, every time I see her I keep thinking about it
foryoutt16 Wait what? I'm lost, what happened?
cocosainzyy55 @foryoutt16 An old interview of Oscar when he was still in F2 resurfaced and he was talking about his ideal type and the description he gave matches nothing to his current girlfriend. People are suddenly bringing this up again, wondering why he didn't choose his ideal type.
foryoutt16 Oh damn that's rough...
The comments and likes flooded in, as they always did. Sometimes, I forgot that I was dating an F1 driver—it came with its own kind of spotlight.
But as I scrolled through the comments under my post, a few things caught my attention.
One comment in particular stood out: something about an old interview of Oscar.
Confused and curious, I decided to look it up. Little did I know, I was about to regret it...
My stomach twisted into knots as I watched the video, realization sinking in. Oscar described his ideal woman, and her characteristics were unlike ones I possessed. I felt a wave of insecurities and doubts wash over me, each word a reminder of how I didn't fit the bill for his ideal partner.
My heart sank with every word he spoke, describing his ideal woman's qualities - and every one felt like another reminder of how far off the mark I was.
I couldn't help but wonder, "Why did he choose me?" His words stung, and I questioned whether he settled for less than his ideal because he didn't have better options.
On cue, as if the universe was playing a cruel joke, Oscar returned home and called out my name. His voice echoed through the hallway, a stark contrast to the turmoil churning inside me. I hesitated, a mix of fear and confusion gripping me, as I debated whether to face him with this newfound knowledge.
He entered the room with a warm smile, oblivious to the storm brewing inside me. He greeted me with a gentle kiss on the forehead before starting to speak in sweet words.
"Hey babe, how was your day?" he asked, completely unaware of the recent discovery I made.
I forced a smile, trying to hide the turmoil inside as I replied, "It was fine," my voice trying to mask the disappointment and insecurity that bubbled up.
The words left my lips, sounding hollow compared to the usual warmth in my tone.
Oscar sensed the hint of falsity in my fake smile. His observant nature picked up on the subtle cues of my distress, and he recognized that something was off. Yet, instead of immediately asking about it, he chose to hold off, observing to see if I would bring it up.
Oscar wrapped his arms around my waist, pulling me closer. He kissed my temple gently, his touch providing a temporary sense of comfort.
He knew something was bothering me and chose not to press, offering a moment of respite instead. "Do you want takeout?" he asked, his voice filled with tenderness.
I replied softly, trying to match his tenderness, "Sounds good." Despite my conflicting emotions, I didn't want to dampen the mood by revealing my insecurities.
"Takeout sounds great," I said, attempting to sound cheerful.
Oscar reluctantly let go of me, reaching for the phone to place the takeout order. In his absence, I seized the opportunity to sneak a look in the mirror, as well as to search for pictures of Oscar's ideal type.
I scoured the internet, comparing every aspect of my appearance to the images of his ideal woman. The comparison fueled my insecurities, amplifying the feeling of not measuring up.
My tears threatened to spill as I stood there, comparing myself to Oscar's ideal, but before they could, I heard Oscar's voice calling out.
"Y/n baby, the food will be here in twenty minutes," he informed me. I swiftly wiped away the tears before responding, attempting to hide the vulnerability in my voice, "Okay, thanks for letting me know."
Splashing my face with water to compose myself, hoping to hide any traces of my tears and distress. With determination, I dried my face and returned to the room where Oscar was, trying to mask my vulnerability.
After the food came, we ate together. I was quiet, it was mainly Oscar talking which was odd because normally it was always me talking and he would listen. We were currently cuddled up together after eating
Despite our cozy cuddle on the couch, my mind was preoccupied with worries. Thoughts like "What if he leaves me?" and "What if I'm not good enough?" consumed me.
Oscar noticed my distraction and asked if I was alright, concern in his voice. I replied, "Just tired," and although he didn't fully believe it, he decided not to push further.
Oscar spoke up once more, his voice soft and reassuring. "Y/n?" he began, his eyes searching mine.
"You know I love you, right? If there's anything bothering you, you know you can tell me," he emphasized, his tone filled with patience and support.
I nodded, attempting to hide the depth of my worries and insecurities. "Yeah, I know. I love you too," I responded, trying to sound reassuring.
The words felt heavy, knowing the weight of my unspoken fears.
A few weeks had passed since that moment of insecurity, and I had been avoiding Oscar, even though we lived together. I had made excuses to skip every Grand Prix , claiming I was too busy with work.
Yet, here I was, facing the mirror on the morning of a home race, feeling utterly unprepared. The interview weighed heavily on my mind, and I wasn't in the right state to face it.
Standing in front of my reflection, I looked at myself, thoughts of my inadequacy resurfacing.
Oscar entered the room, his gaze settling on me. He positioned himself behind me, wrapping his arms around my waist and resting his chin on my head.
His presence brought both comfort and nerves as I stood in front of the mirror, still grappling with my insecurities.
He spoke softly, his compliment genuine and sweet. "I didn't know it was possible to be this pretty. You look amazing love," he murmured, his voice filled with affection.
I stepped away from him, the compliment not offering the comfort it usually would. My actions were distant, as if I was subconsciously putting up a barrier.
"Thanks," I responded distantly, my tone devoid of the warmth that usually accompanied my words.
The fear of his departure and my sense of inadequacy still lingered in my heart, casting a shadow over the moment.
Oscar seemed puzzled by my distant behavior, his confusion evident. Seeing right through my attempt to avoid him, he asked gently,
"Baby, did I do something wrong? Why are you avoiding me?"
His voice was tinged with concern, his eyes filled with hurt at my distance.
I quickly responded, trying to change the subject. "No, you did nothing wrong. Uhm, shouldn't you leave for the race?"
Oscar looked at me, his gaze lingering on me before reluctantly letting it go.
"Wait, weren't you coming with me?" he questioned, his tone hinting at his confusion.
I responded with a slightly busted attitude, "Oh, uhm, I'm not done getting ready yet. I'll come later, though."
It was a lie, and Oscar seemed to sense that something was off.
Despite the passing time, he decided to focus on his own preparations while stealing a moment to kiss my forehead before leaving.
I took a moment to muster my courage, realizing that Oscar didn't deserve being pushed away because of my insecurities.
With a deep breath, I prepared myself to face the day and attend the race, pushing through the weight of my doubts.
As the hours flew by, I found myself standing in the garage, watching from afar, torn between my worries and the desire to support him.
After awhile I decided to go to the restroom since I still had some time before the race started.
As I was walking, I heard voices behind me, and my name being mentioned caught my attention.
I stopped to listen—not that I meant to eavesdrop, but hearing my name made it impossible not to.
From what I could tell, these girls were likely McLaren fangirls. Well duh after all, they were dressed in papaya colors.
Girl 1: "It's crazy that Oscar is still dating y/n. She doesn't even fit his ideal type."
Girl 2: "I know, right? Like, she's not even close."
Girl 3: "Yeah, he must be leading her on or something."
Girl 4: "Or maybe she's in it for the fame and money."
Girl 5: "Oh, definitely. There's no other reason she would be with him."
The girls' laughter echoed in my ears, each comment like a punch to my heart.
Girl 2: "Seriously, you'd think he could do better than her."
Girl 1: "Yeah, she's not even that attractive compared to the other girls he's dated before."
Girl 3: "I bet he'll realize soon that he could get someone way better."
Girl 4: "Well, if the fame and money aren't enough, then he's definitely settling."
I couldn't bear to listen any longer, my tears streaming as I fled to the restroom, seeking solace to hide my distress.
Time slipped away as I stayed there, isolated, wrestling with my tormenting thoughts and self-doubts.
Meanwhile, the McLaren garage buzzed with pre-race energy, but Oscar couldn’t focus. His eyes darted around the paddock, scanning for any sign of you.
Anxiety churned in his gut as he spotted his teammate leaning casually against a workbench.
��Lando!” Oscar called, walking over briskly.
Lando glanced up, eyebrows raised. “What’s up, mate?”
Oscar hesitated before blurting out, “Have you seen Y/N anywhere?”
Lando frowned, clearly puzzled. “No, mate, haven’t seen her. Matter of fact, I don’t think I’ve seen her around for the last few races. Is everything okay?”
Oscar sighed, running a hand through his hair. “I don’t know, mate. She’s been so distant lately, and I have no idea what I’ve done to upset her.”
Lando’s expression softened, a mix of pity and thoughtfulness. “Could it maybe have to do with that video that went viral again?”
Oscar blinked, confused. “What video? That old F2 interview of mine? That was years ago! I was just joking in most of it anyway.”
Lando shrugged, giving him a pointed look. “Mate, you might want to check the comments under her recent Instagram post. I think that’s your answer.”
With a sympathetic pat on the back, Lando turned and walked off, leaving Oscar alone with his thoughts.
He pulled out his phone, his fingers quickly navigating to your profile. The comments under your latest post hit him like a brick.
“Oh no,” Oscar muttered, his stomach sinking. “No wonder she’s been distant…”
He mentally kicked himself, remembering that dumb interview where he’d been too cocky for his own good.
“I didn’t even mean half the stuff I said,” he whispered to himself, cringing at the memory.
Before he could search for you and explain himself, a crew member called his name, dragging him toward the car for pre-race preparations.
“Great timing,” he muttered under his breath. But he made a promise to himself: as soon as this race was over, he’d find you and make things right.
Meanwhile, back to you, the restroom break had taken longer than expected. The initial plan to kill time before the race started had backfired; now, a dull ache was forming in my head, and I couldn’t shake the feeling of unease creeping up on me.
I leaned against the sink for a moment, taking a deep breath. “This is ridiculous,” I muttered to myself, but the discomfort wasn’t going away.
Deciding it was best not to push myself, I pulled out my phone and quickly typed a message to Oscar:
Not feeling great. Heading back home. Don’t worry about me.
I hesitated before hitting send. He’d probably be confused or even concerned, but the last thing I wanted was to worry him.
With a sigh, I hit send and slipped my phone back into my bag.
As I stepped out of the restroom and headed for the exit, I couldn’t help but feel a pang of guilt.
On the way, I also let Oscar's manager know I left, just in case he didn't check his phone.
I knew Oscar would notice my absence, but today, it felt easier to retreat than to stay and face everything swirling in my mind.
Little did I know, Oscar was already worrying.
The race had ended, with Oscar clinching a solid P4, just behind Lando. Though pleased with his result, his mind was elsewhere.
He wanted nothing more than to see you, to feel your arms around him, and hear you tell him how proud you were—just like old times.
But as he scanned the crowd, his hope began to waver. You weren’t there.
His manager noticed Oscar’s distracted gaze and approached him. “Looking for Y/N?” the manager asked gently.
“She left you a message. Said she wasn’t feeling well and headed home.”
Oscar’s jaw tightened, his heart sinking. You hadn’t told him the truth.
A mix of frustration and hurt bubbled to the surface. Without a word, he decided to skip the team celebrations and headed straight home.
When Oscar arrived, he didn’t waste a second. Dropping his bag by the door, he called out loudly—his voice sharper than usual.
“Y/N!”
You were downstairs in no time, a soft smile on your face.
“Oh, hey, Osc! You’re back early. How was the race?” I asked sweetly, trying to act normal.
But Oscar wasn’t having it. His expression was hard as he stared at you.
“You would’ve known if you didn’t leave,” he said, his voice laced with frustration.
Guilt washed over me, and you stammered, “I’m sorry, Osc. I wasn’t feeling well—”
“Cut the crap, Y/N!” he interrupted, startling you. His voice was raised, something he rarely did.
“When are you going to finally admit the real reason you’ve been like this? Tell me! I’m sick of it!”
I flinched but couldn’t blame him. He deserved an explanation. At the same time, I’d had enough, too. My emotions spilled out, my voice breaking.
“How would you feel if people kept telling you that your partner is too good for you? That you’re not good enough, that you’re too ugly, not their type, only with them for the money?!”
Tears streamed down my face as you continued.
“And yes, it’s about that stupid interview of yours! I can’t help it, okay? Call me dumb, call me a crybaby, but this is too much!”
By now, I was full-on sobbing, unable to meet his gaze. But before I could crumble further, I felt his arms wrap around me, pulling me close.
His voice was soft now, gentle. “Why didn’t you tell me, baby? I could’ve helped. We’re a team, remember?”
I sniffled, my voice trembling as I replied, “Those were your words, Oscar. I can’t take them back or change them.”
He sighed, his hand running soothingly up and down your back. “Babe, that interview was years ago. I was joking around the entire time. If you’d watched the whole thing, you’d see that.”
I shook my head, unsure, but he leaned back just enough to look at me.
“Since when is my favorite color pink?” he teased, a small laugh escaping him.
Despite yourself, you let out a small laugh, too.
“That's better,” he said, smiling.
“Listen to me. Everything I said in that interview wasn’t true. I was 18, tired, and didn’t even want to be there. I was just trolling to get it over with.”
I laughed again at his confession, finally meeting his eyes.
“There’s that pretty smile,” he said, his tone softer now. “I’m sorry you had to deal with that, but next time, talk to me, okay?”
I nodded, wiping your tears. “I will. I’m sorry for doubting you… for pushing you away.”
He smiled warmly, leaning in to peck your lips a few times.
“It’s okay, love. I get why you did it. But don’t you ever doubt yourself again, yeah? You’re the most beautiful girl in the world. If anyone doesn’t deserve someone, it’s me. How did I get so lucky, huh?”
He cupped your face, his thumb gently caressing your cheek before pulling you into a long, passionate kiss. When he finally pulled back, his forehead rested against yours.
“Don’t you ever doubt yourself,” he whispered. “You’re my ideal type. Always.”
I laughed softly. “Alright, alright, I get it.”
Suddenly, Oscar scooped me up into his arms, bridal style, making me squeal.
“Osc! What the hell are you doing? Put me down!”
He grinned, shaking his head as he headed toward the bedroom.
“Nope. Let me show my gorgeous girl how much I love her.”
And let’s just say, the night ended perfectly. From that moment on, I never doubted his love for me ever again.
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oscarpiastri An amazing race to finish off the week. A big thank you to the entire team and the fans. Also a big thank you to my beautiful girlfriend for being the best support.
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yourusername So so proud of you Osc!!! Love you! 🩷
oscarpiastri Love you too pretty!
landonorris Well done mate 🙌 extra support is always great!
oscarpiastri Thanks man! You're right especially if she's just my type 😉
yourusername 🤭 ❤️ by author
lalalandnorris4you Oscar really gagged all of you haters purr 💅
frvrformulaonestan1 This is the cutest thing ever brb I'm going to cry 🥹
notyourfan481 Bro Oscar you don't have to lie we all know this ain't you
osclvy/n Girl stfu he isn't going to notice you ffs 🙄
lovelypeachlan4 You thought you did sum? Get out 👉🚪
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yourusername A little recap of last week 🤍
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yourbffuser Looking like a snack 😋😍🥵
yourusername Love ya 💋🫦
oscarpiastri Gorgeous 😍
yourusername Love youu Osc 🥰
alexandrasaintmleux So so so pretty 😘
yourusername Says you beautiful 😉💕
lv4motorsports81 She's so pretty omd
manyyynorriz She's gorgeous, don't know what people were on about 🤨
banananorrispiastry81 🤢
nothingthelessnorris4 And you did this for what ☠️
piastrybakerlvr Move on he isn't going to notice you 🥱
lvlynorrisss4 Yet your comment didn't make any change to this world... Grow up 🤦♀️
The end
#f1 fanfic#f1 imagine#f1 x reader#f1 fic#oscar x reader#oscar piastri x reader#oscar piastri x you#oscar piastri fanfic#oscar piastri imagine#oscar piastri smau#oscar piastri fluff#oscar piastri au#oscar piastri angst
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Mecha headquarters is attacked. The building collapses. Blurr goes in and doesn't come back out. And Swindle's the one that's got to deal with the fallout. As far as nightmare scenarios go, this is pretty high up on Swindle's list.
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Swindle only pulls his phone out of his pocket when he reaches the shadows off to the side of where rescue crews are digging through the rubble of mecha headquarters. Digging they only started because Blurr, the face of mecha, went into that building and didn't come out. Digging they are only continuing because they believe they've found signs of life buried in the rock. Which is why Swindle's phone has been buzzing nonstop for the past several minutes.
He looks at the names next to the missed calls. Shockwave. Shockwave again. Pharma. Unknown number. (Shockwave?)…. The list goes on.
Swindle doesn't know how Shockwave or Pharma knows already, but they must. Swindle's first call since Blurr disappeared under that ton of rubble had been to emergency services. Every call since has been to call in favors, pull strings – exert as much influence as he can to keep the details of what's going on out of the news. To keep the potential damage this could do to a minimum.
Somehow, it hasn't been enough. Which means this situation is fast heading towards something more than what Swindle can handle on his own.
Swindle pulls a second phone from his pocket and hits the number on speed dial.
"Hello?" A voice answers within one ring of Swindle dialing. Onslaught. He relaxes slightly.
"You watching the news?" Swindle skips over customary greetings, security measures – there's no time for them now. He knows it is Onslaught on the other end of the line. Onslaught will recognize it is him by his voice. That much, they still have to be able to trust.
What exactly will be on the news, Swindle doesn't know. But, it's a safe bet that at least some of the basics of the mecha attack will be broadcast. Beyond that, it all depends on how much Swindle's contacts came through.
"Yeah. Mecha was attacked. They're saying no casualties, so why are you calling me?" Onslaught asks.
"That's all they're saying?" Swindle asks in return. "No casualties?"
"That's all. No casualties," Onslaught confirms. "Showed some footage of the fighting. Pretty standard stuff. Cut in some impressive footage of Blurr's mech. What's going on? Not that I'm not glad to hear personal confirmation you're not dead, but this line is for emergencies."
"There is one. Shockwave." Swindle says the name as though there's no further justification needed for why he's calling on this line. And really, there isn't. They had agreed to that from the start of this venture. "He's been calling me. Non-stop."
Swindle thinks he hears a soft curse on the other end of the line then, "Why would he care? What's his interest?"
"Blurr," Swindle says. "That footage, of his mech – was the actual fight. A fight he never should have been in. But he did it anyways because there was no other option. He went into the building and he never came out. He's the reason they're still here digging – the reason I'm still here."
"And the reason Shockwave's calling," Onslaught fills in.
"Yes. Him. And Pharma." Swindle adds.
"Pharma is a medic, you know. With ratchet going more or less of the grid and First Aid and Ambulon tied up with Vortex he's the highest ranked medic in mecha. It would be his job to supervise pilot injuries." Swindle can tell even over the line that Onslaught doesn't really believe his own words. But they need to make sure they've covered everything if they're going to stay ahead of this.
"He shouldn't know though. I called in favors to delay the news of Blurr's status until after excavation is complete and you said yourself the news only confirmed no casualties yet," Swindle points out. "I've sent no internal communications. Pharma shouldn't know yet. He's too close to Shockwave. Neither of them should know. But they've both been calling since the collapse – within minutes of each other."
Swindle definitely hears Onslaught swear at that. "I don't know exactly what the connection is between Shockwave and Pharma – but I don't want Pharma – or Shockwave – anywhere near this, anywhere near Blurr," he finishes.
"Blurr's alive?" The question is stated matter-of-factly, though Swindle wouldn't have blamed Onslaught for expressing a note of skepticism. If the man is still alive, there's no way he's walking away from this without serious injuries. Swindle would bet every dollar in his accounts on it.
"Possibly. There are signs of life under the rubble. We paid Blurr to be the part of a hero for the media. Turns out when it mattered it wasn't entirely an act. He saved a lot of lives today – including mine." If Blurr is pulled from that rubble alive, Swindle will give every dollar it takes from his bank account to ensure it stays that way. They need Blurr. More than he knows.
"I never told Blurr the truth behind why it was so important that mecha hire him," Swindle's voice drops as he says the words.
"I am not repaying what he did today by letting him find out firsthand whatever it is Shockwave does in those labs of his. We're not going to sit back and watch the creation of another Vortex. It was bad enough when we didn't know. Now…. Right now, I need you to distract Shockwave and Pharma."
"How long do you need?" As Swindle had at the beginning of their call, Onslaught skips the unnecessary validation and asks the question that gets at the point. It has Swindle breathing a sigh of relief.
"A few hours, minimum. But I'll take anything you can give me, just stall them as long as you can. I've got to go." Swindle hangs up without waiting for Onslaught's reply. A stretcher is being carried out of the ruins towards a waiting helicopter.
Swindle manages to make it onboard just before take-off. He rides all the way to the hospital with Blurr. Handles all the forms. Tells the receptionists to put the bills on his card. He knows (hopes) Blurr could do it when the time came (the man certain has the money; Swindle's been writing his checks) – but he shouldn't have to. All Blurr should have to focus on is his recovery, and what comes next. Blurr should have friends, family, a partner – someone to support him in this.
Swindle knows – has known since early on in working with Blurr – that that is not the case. He's observed enough to see that Blurr asks for help if he truly needs it, but no one just offers it to him. Because no one knows to. In this case, Blurr cannot ask, so Swindle manages instead.
In an ideal world, someone would stay by Blurr's hospital bed, simply so the man didn't have to wake up alone in unfamiliar surroundings with no explanations. But this is not an ideal world. And Swindle is not that person. His time runs out long before then.
Fresh blood has been spilled. The predators are circling. Swindle has a show to put on. The best he can do is leave his card on the bedside table as a reminder and hope Blurr actually calls if he needs anything.
I. LOVE THIS. SO FUCKING MUCH YOU CANNOT EVEN IMAGINE
Absolutely in love with this conspiracy thing Onslaught and Swindle have going on. Because YES. OF COURSE. Gosh this is why I love Combaticons. They’re on their own side. Whatever system they are forced to be part of - it doesn’t have full control on them. They’re doing their own thing ehehehehhehe
#maccadam#transformers#tf mecha universe#mecha art#hmm….how tf do I tag it#mecha cbc art#swindle#mecha writing#mecha cbc writing#mecha bs writing#blurr#Onslaught
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bakugou and vampire!reader................ he's so unsure about everything, he doesn't really know what to do with himself or you or the fact that you're a vampire but when you kneel down in front of him and bat your eyelashes while asking to taste his blood, he really has no other option that to just let you do it.
his heart is about to combust, he's sweating and he's squirming in his seat – with you sat between his thighs, gently cradling his hand and kissing his knuckles, it's impossible for him to calm himself. he feels a bit lightheaded from the way you're looking at him; your pupils are dilated, your eyes low, as you force down your own desire and focus on guiding him through his first time instead.
he can't even bring himself to say anything when you ask him whether you can keep on going – he gives you a nod and you watch his adam's apple bob. you know him well enough to take this a sign to continue; he won't admit that he's nervous, no fucking way, but you do think it's sweet that he's still willing to let you do this.
when your lips finally ghost over his wrist, he bites down a sound.
he leans back on his free hand and throws his head back and you're forced to stifle a chuckle – he's awfully cute like this. a blush creeps up from under his shirt collar and without having to see him properly, you already know his face is doing any better either. his whole body burns, it feels as if he's on fire, but he refuses to back down.
“how are we doing, suki, hm?”
something soars inside him; it spreads from his lower stomach – up and down, to his chest and to his thighs, to his arms and to his legs, to his fingers and to his toes. and you're really not even doing anything just yet.
“g– good.”
his raspy voice breaks despite him trying to hold it together with all of his might. your hot breath warms his skin and he digs his fingers into the bedsheets below him – he curses his body for being so damn sensitive and he curses himself for being so weak for you.
“i need you to look at me when i do it.”
his eyes pop open but he doesn't turn to look at you. he doesn't dare.
“what for?”
“because i don't want to push you too far, baby. i need you to keep your eyes on me, so i can make sure of that.”
his chest heaves.
“please?”
his body moves completely on its own when he cranes his neck to finally meet your starved gaze again. his answer is just a grumble and his reward is you pressing one last kiss to his wrist – you stay there with your mouth still against him and your eyes fixated on his dark ones for a moment before parting your lips and giving him a glimpse of your sharp teeth.
bakugou sucks in a breath.
you sink your fangs into his skin and he clenches his jaw. his whole body tenses up and you placing your free hand on his thigh does nothing to help him relax; his pupils grow bigger at the sight of you latched onto him, at the feeling of your tongue against him. the sensation of you draining his blood is weird to say the least but there isn’t a single part of him that wants to pull away.
he’s mesmerized.
when you trail your hand up over his body until you finally reach the middle of his chest, you give him a few pats, silently telling him to breathe again. he can see the mischievous glint in your eyes, he knows you’d tease him for it if you weren’t busy drinking his blood, and the flush on his cheeks deepens.
but it doesn’t take long before his mind starts growing hazy and you know you’ll have to stop a bit earlier than you usually do, but it’s not like you really mind. you watch how his blinking slows and feel his breathing finally begins to even out – pulling away from his wrist, his eyes widen a bit more as he watches you lick your lips clean and stand from your place between his thighs, only to straddle his hips instead.
ignoring how tired his body suddenly feels, he snakes his arms around your middle anyway and lets you push him down onto his back.
you nip at his jaw and press yourself flush against him. “that wasn’t too bad, was it, baby?”
the fact you’re so fucking close now makes bakugou’s head flood with filthier images than he’d like to admit but he blames it all on the delirium caused by the blood loss. he swallows down a groan as he kneads the plush flesh of your waist and shakes his head.
he thinks your hum sounds like a purr.
and you think he looks extra cute like this.
slowly, you tilt your head to the other side of his face and lower yourself down, so you can press your lips against his pulse point. “will you let me do it here next time, suki?”
goosebumps raise on his skin despite how warm he feels and his hips buck up into yours in an instant.
“fuck…”
“say yes.”
bakugou doesn’t like to be told what to do. he doesn’t like when people order him around and he doesn’t like when people command him.
“yes.”
#i wanna eat himmmmmmmm:3333333333333333#bakugou#mickey is daydreaming#bakugou x reader#katsuki bakugo x reader
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I wrote something for this! Beneath the cut so it’s not a giant block on somebody’s page. But it really liked this idea! @beneathsilverstars
You're sitting in your car, staring at a clock with all the power your, admittedly tiny, body possesses. You said you would arrive at her house at four, but you showed up at three thirty! Which is way too early to show up at someone's house so they could drink your blood, are you crazy? Madam Odile was going to think you were so weird, stars!
You take a deep breath in, and out. You repeat the motion two more times as you wait for the clock to tick. Two minutes to four o’clock, and maybe it was okay to show up a minute earlier but what if it wasn't!? You couldn't risk that! She might refuse to drink your blood if you offended her, and then you wouldn't get paid and then you couldn't pay rent…
Okay, you could wait two more minutes. You glance at the clock again, and it's already 4:03. Where have you been the past five minutes?!
You jump out the car, steady yourself, and hurry towards the front door.
“Donating” blood to vampires for money is a pretty common practice, since they usually pay pretty well and don't need to take too much blood. You can donate a couple times a month without any major health issues . Plus, with agencies dedicated to organizing blood matches between humans and vampires, it's not a particularly dangerous job. It's also proven to be the only job you can keep.
Of course it is, though. You're a human blood bag. There's not much to screw up as long as you stay still and don't act like a creep.
The match you're currently freaking out about is with a middle aged woman named Odile, who seemed decently wealthy by the size of her house and the fact she can afford rent in this economy. You envy her the tiniest bit about that last one.
She opened the door, looking exactly the same as her photos, and you smile at her.
“Nice to meet you! I'm Siffrin, I'm your donor for today!” Customer service mode, on!
She gives you a quick once over before nodding at something and moving to let you in, “Odile. Please come in.”
You hop over the doorway and carefully take off your shoes before you follow her to her couch. Thank the stars, you didn't really feel comfortable anywhere else. Bedroom was… weird, and the kitchen felt like you were just a piece of meat. Not that that was particularly inaccurate, but you couldn't stop yourself from feeling bad about it.
You sit on the couch where Odile gestures for you and take off your gloves. They are kinda scratchy, but you don't want to have to deal with strangers giving you weird looks about the marks lining your wrist. Odile doesn't comment on them, which is yet another win!
“So, how would you like to–”
“One moment.” Odile holds up a hand and walks away. You sit awkwardly on the couch, gloves off, waiting for her. Your skin starts to crawl a bit. She wasn't just going to leave you here,be right? You couldn't possibly have screwed up already. Unless he saw the marks on your wrist and thought you were some sort of weirdo who enjoyed getting bitten by vampires–oh, stars, what if she thought you were some sort of perverted creep? Should you leave? What if–
“Alright, I'm back. Is apple juice ok? I don't have any iron supplements, that was thoughtless of me. My apologies.”
Uh. you… didn't usually get something to drink when you did this..? You kept stuff in your car since you tended to get kicked out the moment you were finished. You could hardly blame any of those people, you didn't like strangers in your house either. Even if you did tend to need to wait alone in your car until you weren't woozy anymore, and your heating/cooling systems gave out a while ago…
Crab, you forgot to respond, “that's fine! Uh, thank you!”
Odile nods and makes her way over to you, setting the glass on a coaster on the table. She sits a bit away from you, which is appreciated but also slightly disappointing. You offer her your wrist. Better not to give her an option in case she tries your neck. The last time someone did that it was… a lot of touch from a stranger,
She takes it carefully in her hand, and you flinch a bit. She's holding you so, so carefully it's almost ticklish. She pauses, long enough for you to recollect yourself.
“Have you washed your hands?” she asks. Pretty common question, should not make you feel as dirty as it does.
“Yes ma’am.” You watch as she nods, mostly to herself, then sinks her teeth into your vein. You flinch again but she holds your wrist just firmly enough that the skin doesn't tear on her fangs. Thank the universe, you could not bleed all over her furniture. You didn't even have a couch at your house, but you knew how expensive they were. You wait, perfectly still even when you start to get a bit dizzy, enjoying the gentle touch on your wrists and odd intoxicated feeling you got whenever a vampire bites you.
… Which is disgusting, you shouldn't feel that way. This was a business transaction, stop being weird. It wasn't meant to be pleasant.
Odile finishes surprisingly quickly, pulling off and pressing a black towel to your wrist. You take it from there, holding the towel with one hand as you eye your apple juice. You definitely want a drink now, but you don't know when she’s going to ask you to leave.
She nudges it towards you, and you carefully accept. Geez, she didn't take much, but you've already donated a couple times this month. You feel woozier than usual.
“You should wait an hour or two before you leave,” Odile comments, standing and walking out, “it'll be late then, but I don't have anything to give you for dinner, as you can imagine. I hope you don't mind.”
An hour… or two? The longest you usually even needed was thirty minutes. Was this Odile’s first time doing this? But you can't imagine she was turned recently if she didn't bother keeping food in the house. Not to mention the illegal nature of being turned in the first place. It still happened, but it wasn't very common? Most were just born vampires these days.
“Well?” Odile's standing in front of you, stars! You needed to stop zoning out! What did she even say…?
“Yes, ma’am,” you mumble, hoping it's the right answer. There's no adverse response, so you think it's probably fine? She sits on an armchair next to you, far enough away that she couldn't grab you but close enough that she can watch you comfortably. She takes out a book and begins to read, and you sip your apple juice in bafflement. What was she even doing? …did she want seconds?
… You don't think you have it in you to give any more blood tonight. If she asks, you don't think you can really refuse, but you really don't want to. You reach for your gloves.
“Don't you need bandages?” she asks, arching her eyebrows.
You pause, gloves in hand, and need a second before you can fully process what she said, “not… really? I don't have any on hand, anyway.” You slump a little at the effort it takes to form coherent responses; which is probably cause for concern. Geez, you're tired.
“Hm. I'll remember next time, then.” Ah, so she was a repeat customer. You got those sometimes, but they usually didn't linger for fear of forming an actual connection with a human of all things. There's another pause before Odile speaks again, “why are you doing this? So often, too.”
That was a question you received pretty often, even from the quietest of vampires. To be fair, Odile didn't seem chatty to be exact, but apparently she had a curious streak.
“Well… the pay is good,” you tell her, cradling your drink. And it's the only way anyone will ever touch me, remains unsaid.
“Hm. money problems, then?” she asks, tone distant. Seems like she's already lost interest. You zone out a bit, then realize you should probably say something in response.
“...I've got plenty in the bank, just not the blood kind” you mumble, not particularly paying attention.
Odile laughs.
…
…oh!
You made her laugh!
A dazed smile makes its way onto your face. You feel warm, and there are little fireworks in your stomach because you made her laugh! This means she definitely doesn't hate you, right? Sure, she was gentle earlier, but that's a bit of a requirement with the more finicky veins. Can't have you bleeding out and ruining her nice furniture. But! You made her laugh! So even if she thinks you're gross for being this desperate for money, she probably doesn't hate you too much!
… or does she? Maybe this time was just a fluke. You should probably try again so you can be extra sure she doesn't hate you. Just in case. Something about blood, or banks, or vampires… but what if you offended her!? Most vampires didn't like your jokes!
You should be a little more vague. Just to be safe.
“Um, how many apples grow on a tree?” you ask, gesturing to your drink a bit. Odile gives you a confused look.
“Pardon?”
“All of them!” you tell her, grinning. She purses her lips, but doesnt look particularly annoyed. More confused, which was not the reaction you were going for.
“I… see.”
Quick, try again, “sorry, I tried to make a joke, but there were no fruits to my labor!”
Odile snorts at that one, turning the page of her book, “I see. You poor thing.”
You giggle, and she shakes her head at your next few attempts to make her laugh. Regardless, an hour later you're feeling much better and leave. You don't even have to sit in your car very long before you feel safe to drive, which is good because the cold has gotten a lot worse over the past few days. You should start carrying heat pads.
I continued this on AO3 with the name “Damothgremlin” in case you’re interested! It’s called In Blood Bags And Time.
thinkign about odile with fangies,,
au where odile is a vampire and siffrin "donates blood" for money (classic occupation for someone lonely and hopeless) and siffrin says something funny while woozily recovering and odile did NOT expect that from him and laughs and siffrin is like. oh fuck yes i'm getting a good grade in being vampire food.
it's not even a purposeful dumb joke he's just a little out of it and saying things. which odile usually gets annoyed when people go all no-filter and say things to her that she is not interested in hearing or god forbid having to respond to. but siffrin is just being cute and earnest and still not too chatty!
and then siffrin is like I MADE HER LSUGH I HAVE TO KEEP BEING FUNNY and his actual attempts at jokes are so weak that they wrap back around to being entertaining. odiles like mhm im sure there was a joke in there somewhere maybe try again in twenty minutes.
they're going through an agency at first, but odile gets annoyed at how large of a cut the agency takes, but it's easier and safer than trying to arrange something with a stranger independently. but she really likes siffrin so after a couple times she's like. no pressure but if you'd rather get paid a little more we could just continue doing this informally. and siffrin is like YES PLEASE bc they really need the money and they like odile too!
but then siffrin starts donating too much blood bc he's still going through the agency as often as allowed And going to odile independently. it's pretty obvious pretty quickly though, and as soon as she catches on odile lectures them and says she won't keep doing this if siffrin won't take care of themself, and siffrin gets all sad (<- hates to be rejected) and is like oh.. ok.. guess i'll leave... and odile is like oh my god no you still have to drink your orange juice first and you should not have even driven HERE in the first place. *i* will drive you home. which has siffrin all ?? bc wow mixed messages (<- has never been cared about before). but odile finds out that siffrin lives in the shittiest apartment ever and is always this close away from getting evicted and long story short siffrin ends up moving in with odile.
odile is like. well. this is kind of a problematic setup but definitely better than the alternative.
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thinking about neighbor! toji fushiguro… (#drool)
cw: 18+ content, mdni. toji lowk being a perv ngl, panty sniffing, male masturbation, spanking mentioned, and reader sleeping w/ someone else
neighbor! toji fushiguro… who could practically hear everything through the paper thin shared apartment walls. from the moment that you open and shut the door to the moment that you turned on the faucet to take your nightly shower.
“fuck.”
and now, neighbor! toji fushiguro… who could hear every single hushed moan that escaped your pretty lips, pick up every creak of your old bed frame.
and who had now been presented with three options:
a. be an asshole—go knock obnoxiously loud on your door and bark at you to keep it down. (and piss you off in the process)
b. be less of an asshole and more of a perv—listen in.
c. be normal—put on stupid whale noises to drown out the noise and fall asleep.
neighbor! toji fushiguro… who hadn’t gone to a school, not in the traditional sense anyways. but knew that one of those answers was more appealing than the other two—practically blaring in green lights to be picked.
neighbor! toji fushiguro… who didn’t dwell on the depraved nature of his actions, holding up one of the lace panties you’d accidentally dropped last time you did laundry at his place. he pressed the crotch area against his nose, the lace frill brushing up against his scarred lips.
toji sunk against the plush mattress underneath, closing his eyes and letting himself imagine that it wasn’t a piece of cloth resting above his nose right now. imagining that it was your slick folds resting against his tastebuds instead, savoring every last drop. he’d make sure that you came at least once on his mouth before he even made any attempt to stick his cock inside you.
but that was just him, anyways. a shame, truly. he’d bet the collection of very expensive swords in the back of his closet on being sure that the ‘man’ with you hadn’t bothered.
“spank me, please.”
and how toji wanted to do just that, feel your ass jiggle and bounce underneath his fingertips. how he wanted to be the reason that you would be a moaning mess. toji palmed himself through the material of his grey sweats, a dark patch starting to form while drop after drop of precum leaked from the tip of his hardening cock.
it was pathetic, really.
going from someone who’d get paid for just the simplest peck, getting paid just for two minutes of his time to having to jerk off simply because he heard his neighbor getting fucked. albeit, a bit mediocrely. if you were to ask him anyways. it was a bit too quiet. the only moans you were letting out were commands—commands for your hookup partner to take some control.
“you can be rough.”
“h-harder, please.”
toji tried to pick up on any sounds that the man was letting out—being met with only silence and your muffled moans. hearing the occasional spank— and even that sounded too forced. too low. toji dropped his sweats just underneath his balls, smearing the drops of precum across the mushroom tip of his cock. stuffing your panties into his mouth without a second thought—tasting the remnants of your slick and muffling his own heavy breathing.
as arousing as it’d been at first, toji could feel himself getting frustrated with you—frustrated that you weren’t getting fucked properly when all you could’ve done was just come knock on his door. hearing you ask over and over to be dominated when he could’ve had you with your ass up in the air and mewling into your pillows. taken you to ‘pound town’ (whatever the fuck that is) like he heard you say to your friend during a late night call.
instead, he was forced to time every single stroke of his cock to the subpar sex you were having next door. forcing himself to try to ignore the sound of his heart beating against his chest with every second he fantasized about having your cunt on his mouth, on his dick, filled up to the brim just to try and hear a bit of the noises you were letting out.
just when toji was about to increase his pace, he was met with complete and utter silence. only hearing the bed creak once more. “yeah, okay, bye,” your voice sounded too normal—too composed for what had just taken place. like you weren’t even the slightest bit out of breath, the slightest bit affected.
neighbor! toji fushiguro… who didn’t hesitate in getting up from bed when he heard the buzz of your vibrator just mere seconds after your hookup had left, making his way over to your apartment.
a/n: thirst for this old man’s getting real 😓. anyways, twas inspired by this augustinthewinter audio
#starzradio ✐ᝰ#↻ ��� || ▷ ↺ streaming: toji fushiguro#might expand on this if enuf people want it lol#idk though don’t listen to me#toji fushiguro#toji fushiguro smut#jujutsu kaisen smut#jujutsu kaisen fanfic#jujutsu kaisen#toji fushiguro headcanons#toji fushiguro x female reader#toji fushiguro fanfiction#toji fushiguro x y/n#toji fushiguro x you#toji fushiguro x reader#toji fanfic#toji smut#fushiguro toji smut#fushiguro toji#fushiguro toji x you#fushiguro toji x reader#fushiguro toji x female! reader#fushiguro toji x y/n#toji x reader#toji x you#toji x y/n
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Live Stream
Sylus x gn!streamer!Reader
Based on a prompt from @syluspen that took me WAY TOO LONG to get around to. This is actually a compilation of all the little things I started for it but never really finished. So, uh, enjoy
Warnings: fluff, silly, established relationship, video games
Word Count: 909
Main Masterlist
First Love and Deepspace Masterlist
Second Love and Deepspace Masterlist
AO3
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The first time was an accident, really. He didn't realize you were in the middle of streaming for how quiet you were being and came in to ask you what you wanted for dinner.
From that point on, Sylus was the most anticipated part of every livestream.
You didn't mind it. You love your man, love that he chooses to interrupt even when he knows you are streaming just to bring you a drink or give you a quick kiss just to let you know he's home from "work". You're always a little worried someone will recognize him. Thankfully, no one has so far, and hopefully it stays that way.
The chat's screaming is your only warning before arms wrap around you from behind and Sylus's chin is resting on your shoulder. You lean back into him easily, beaming as you pause in your gaming, letting it sit on a dialogue box, waiting to be read.
"Did you just get home?"
"Mhm." He playfully brushes this side of your headphones back with his nose, exposing your ear and kissing your sideburn. "What are you playing?"
"Dream Daddy." You laugh at the odd look he gives you. You circle your mouse over your avatar in the corner. "Aren't I cute? Think you'd still date me if I look like this?"
He huffs a laugh. "Sweetie, if I would still date you if you were a worm, I would still date you if you were a guy."
The chat is zooming by quickly on the secondary monitor he bought you. A lot of people scream about him being "bisexual confirmed?!?!!" He pays them no mind.
"Is it a dating sim?" he asks.
You nod, turning your head to kiss his cheek. "Awe, guys, he's learning!"
"Any good dating options?" he asks playfully. "My current partner keeps teasing me; I may need to browse some new options."
You laugh and he chuckles by your ear, squeezing you tighter in ardent affection. You open up a browser to pull up a picture of all the love interests lined up. You explain each one to him while he listens patiently.
"Which one are you going for right now?"
"Guess."
He hums thoughtfully. "Robert?"
"Got it in one."
"Well, he's the most like me."
??? Is he a cryptid hunter too????
literally look nothin alike how tf
Istg this guy is in some shady business...
You flip back over to the game. He can tell now that one of the other love interests is who you're talking to. You turn your head so you can whisper in his ear. "You alright?"
He hums again with a small nod. "Just tired. Don't worry, sweetheart."
"Let me finish this up and we can go to bed, okay?" You kiss his cheek to cement your promise. He lifts his chin from your shoulder and kisses your forehead. "I'll only be a minute."
"Take your time." He kisses your forehead again for good measure. "Have fun, sweetie." His arms slide from their place around you as he heads toward the door.
-
Sylus loves watching you like this. Usually, he would wait somewhere else in a manor, tending to product for buyers or going over contracts. Tonight, however, you'd promised your viewers that you would play a horror game, and you needed him there in the room as moral support.
Which meant he got to tend to his guns (being off-camera as it were) and watch you panic over a haunted bear that wanted to kill you.
"Fuck fuck fuck, where's Bonnie?!" You jump with a startled cry, nearly flinging your headphones off from the fright. You lean back into your chair, hands on your head, as you read chat and try to calm your racing heart.
"You alright, sweetie?" he calls, trying to hide the amusement in his voice.
You're either too dazed to notice it or ignoring it altogether as you hum noncommittally. "The rabbit got me," you murmur.
The chats start flooding in out of nowhere. A few donations, a lot of screaming...
"Oh, I forgot to tell you guys that my partner is here for moral support." You giggle breathlessly. You look over at him with a smile. "They got jumpscared by your voice."
He chuckles. "I suppose I should be flattered to be on par with the monsters in your game."
-
Headcanons:
He supports your streaming without hesitation
Top of the line monitors, ergonomic chairs, cat ear headphones - name it and it's yours
But he doesn't show up during your streams very often
Really you're the one who insisted he stay out of sight, given his work and the possibility that someone may just recognize him
He likes to play your livestreams in the background while he works
When you excitedly ramble to him about what happened later, he already knows, but he loves to hear it from you
If you mention craving something, he's there after a bit with exactly what you wanted, whether it's a drink or a snack
Understands completely if you don't want to eat on camera, and just saves it for you for after
Maybe sticks his head into the room to show you what he got, or messages you saying it's waiting on the table
Very very rarely is he ever in the room while you stream, but it does happen
He scared your viewers when he suddenly spoke up from the sidelines
They thought he broke in or something
---
Tag List:
@the-golden-jhope @huen1ngk41 @armycaratlover @sylusfluffymeow @cheesemachine44 @nyx2021 @angel-jupiter @thelittlebutton @pikachuzhc @pomegranatepip @cordidy @an-ever-angry-bi @thejysemongko
#fanfic#fanfiction#sylus#sylus x reader#love and deepspace sylus#lads sylus#lnds sylus#love and deepspace#love and deepspace x reader#lads#lads x reader#lnds#lnds x reader#gn reader#x gn reader#gender neutral reader#x gender neutral reader
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End Of Time
They were dancing under the rain, knowing it wouldn't last forever. Memories were collected and hearts were stolen. Maybe it was never about the rain.
Summary: What if an exchange student changes your whole life, and you're scared of the day he needs to turn back? +18
exchange student jungkook x fem!reader
warnings/content: violence (slap), mention of blood, sexual content (loss of virginity, unprotected sex - don't be stupid!), family issues, alcohol, angst, fluffy love TT
wc: 17,3k
˚₊✩‧₊2024˚₊✩‧₊
"We are really happy to have you guys here. The atmosphere in the team is also awesome!"
The interviewer has a soft smile while saying so. They have been sitting here for only ten minutes, and more than half of the time is already over. Her eyes turn to the more introverted person in the room.
"Jungkook, you are one of the best players this season. We talked about your career a lot, but you're the only one who isn't sharing his personal life. Like a relationship, for example. Or your first love!"
"Firstly, thank you for the compliment. And yeah, first love and all that-" he says with a polite smile. His mind is going back to a time when he met you for the first time. "I like to keep things in my own little world. That's why I'm not sharing a lot about it."
Jungkook is praying that the interviewer wouldn't ask any further questions. Today he is lucky, and the topic changes; all the attention goes to someone else. He is safe, and for a moment he is thinking back to the old times.
˚₊✩‧₊2014˚₊✩‧₊
It was a Monday, and you hate the first day of the week. Today should be a little better than the other days because some of the new exchange students were coming. The teacher gave you the job to assist them on the first day. Her reasoning: You were the class representative. You don't know how you managed to be one, but you liked your job.
"Yn"
You turn around to see which of your annoying friends was calling for you, only to be met with Tae. "What do you want?! It's not even 9 a.m. Let me live!" You say annoyed that he caught you that early.
"Calm down, dude. I saw some of the exchange students already. Some of the ladies said one of them is hot. We're lucky to be with them on the first day. Do you have a plan for the day?" He informs you while walking to the class. You don't know how he managed to get all this information. He is always the last one to come to school. It looks like he is excited about the whole situation. You don't want to lie; you are also curious about the newbies. They will be in your class for only 6 months, but maybe you will have a chance to make new friends. The exchange students from last year were two girls who just came to bully others, so it was no fun. But this time it sounds like some of them are also good-looking? You need to check on that.
"Hmm, it would be a lie when I say I planned something. Isn't it too strict anyway? Let's just show them the school and eat together. That should be enough for the first day," you say while thinking of other options just in case he isn't agreeing with you. You turn to Tae to see if he has anything to say, but he just nods. "And did you really come here that early to get all the information?"
"Nah, I forgot my book and needed to do the homework. So I came a little earlier today. I can already feel the missing 2 hours of sleep," he makes a crying face. You roll your eyes and laugh. "Did you see Jiho or Jia?". "Nope."
—
"It's getting awkward standing here and waiting for them," Jia says with an annoyed noise. The whole class was waiting for the home teacher to come and introduce the new students. But the whole process was taking longer than expected.
After fifteen minutes, you could hear the teacher coming while talking to the students. She didn't introduce them but started talking about important things and the school. Your eyes wander to the two boys standing next to her. And yes, you do know who the girls were calling hot. You could feel his charm, and now the whole situation is more fun for you.
—
Jungkook is happy to be with you and your friend group. At first he was scared if he could make new friends, and if not, he would be depressed for six months. You guys were hanging out during the school day and sometimes after that. He is also happy that Eun could find friends. For him, Eun is also a nice friend, but he knows that they're opposite personalities. Anyway, the first four weeks were comfortable for him, so he hopes that the rest of the time will be like that too.
It was early in the morning, and he was walking to school. Looking around, he notices that you're walking to the subway station. He runs towards you. "Good morning. Caught you!". You jump a little, holding your chest. "Why are you coming like that?!" you point a finger at him. He only laughs at your cute attitude. "Oh, come on, why are you acting like you saw a monster or something? That breaks my heart," he says dramatically. You roll your eyes. "We are getting late, so hurry up!". You can see his pout when you make faster steps.
He is fast getting into the tram, and he is holding a seat for you too. You sit between him and the window—the seat he was reserving for you. He smiles and looks around. "Are you coming today? Tae asked to hang out near the beach and grab some beer in the group chat. I didn't see your reply."
"Oh, I saw the messages in the morning, so I couldn't reply. But yes, I am in."
"Okay, that's nice to hear!" he says while smiling. No, he doesn't know why he gets so giddy when you're around. He is throwing away all the complicated thoughts. He only knows you for like four weeks. He needs to calm down.
—
The school day was kind of stressful. You got your test results, way lower than expected. You did learn weeks before, and you were confident that you could make it. Okay, it would be a lie to say you would nail it because math is not your strongest subject. Knowing nothing will ever help you understand it makes you feel down. Now you're walking with your friends and Jungkook to the convenience store to grab some snacks and drinks. It feels suffocating; you would rather go home and, you don't know, learn more?
Jungkook can see the little cloud above your head, so he walks a little faster to get to you. You are in your own little bubble, not seeing him looking at you. He taps your head to gain your attention. "We are going to chill and not to a funeral." You stick out your tongue. "I thought it was your funeral. How lame". He tries not to laugh, but it just works for two seconds. "No, seriously, what's the matter?". You shrug. "Just math. I really am too stupid to understand that shit."
"Come on, man, you act like you need to be perfect! It's okay to fail one subject, and I can also help you a little. Tae asked me too, so we could make a learning group." He suggests kindly. You think about it a little, and then you simply nod. Now his smile goes even wider; you watch him for a while.
"Oh my God, finally we're here! I thought we would never make it!" says Tae while breathing like he did six marathons. You break the short eye contact with Jungkook and turn to your friends. "You are so dramatic. And don't get thousands of snacks like last time; we need to walk a little to the beach. I will let you carry them!" You just watch him run into the store without listening. Jungkook laughs about that and follows the others. Sometimes you can't believe how they are older than you. Okay, 1 year is not a big gap, but anyway.
After a little shopping tour and two more arguments with Tae, you are walking to the beach. The sun is slowly going down, and you like the vibe. You are lucky that no one had the energy to go that far on the beach, so it is quite enjoyable. Sitting down, you open up the beer, thinking about life. Everyone else looked also deep in thought. Maybe sometimes this is the best way to sort out your mind. When the sunset is almost over, Jiho sighed. "It's getting depressing. Let's go swim." Yeah, funny you thought, never ever. Of course, all the boys jump for the idea and are running towards the water. Your eyes linger a little longer on Jungkook's body. He is giving a show for real, the way he takes off his shirt and flexes his muscles.
Jungkook is aware of your gaze. For him, it's just a confirmation that you also do find him a little attractive. No? Is he delulu? Maybe! He enjoys the time playing in the water, but the wet jeans are giving him a hard time. After a quick check with the others, they come back to the spot where you and Jia were lying. Jungkook watches your figure, and he is wondering if you were asleep. He can't stop thinking about your emotions and the fact that a school subject is bothering you that much. Are you a perfectionist? You definitely don't look like one.
You could hear the movements next to you, so you open one eye to see what was happening. "Did you have fun?" you ask with a little smile on your face. "The water was a little cold, but besides that, it was fun. Do you want to go into the water too?" he asks while wiggling his eyebrows. You laugh at him, "No, it's too cold for that." His relaxed posture turns a little worried. "Are you cold?". You make a quick 'x' with your fingers.
"The boys and I are going to play basketball tomorrow in the late afternoon; do you want to come watch? Maybe we could go grab some lunch after," he suggests. Deep inside, he wants you to come, but you were taking a long time to answer. "Sure, why not? But I need to do some school stuff beforehand, so if I don't reach my goal, I will stay home." He rolls his eyes. "You need to go easier on yourself." You hum, and then you just watch the night sky. After a little hesitation, Jungkook lies next to you and watches the stars. It was comfortable.
You guys are sitting there for one more hour, and then you call it a night. Tae is the one who couldn't understand his limits with the alcohol, but it's nothing new. Jiho takes him home, and you bid goodbye to your friend Jia, who is living on the way to your house. Now you are alone, walking with Jungkook. There is a comfortable silence between you two. He is staying alone in a small apartment, but you know that there was a shorter route for him to go home. Anyway, it feels safer to have someone next to you, so you don't even ask him about it. When you reach your house, you turn fully to Jungkook. "Thank you for walking with me," you say. Jungkook acts surprised, "Naah, it's nothing. It's on my way home, so no big deal." You smile at that and wave him goodbye. He watches as you were walking the stairs. When he hears you entering the code and the closing door, he starts walking away.
The house is quiet. It looked like everyone was sleeping. And you are happy to finally get out of your shoes. Just in the moment where you open the shoe rack, you see your dad's shoes. You sigh. Yup, this will be a suffocating weekend; it is the only thing that you could think of. Walking to your room, you just pray that no one from your family, especially your dad, would bother you.
–
You are learning for like 5 hours, and you can feel the headache coming. Standing up, you walk to your bed and kneel down. A little box underneath is smiling at you, and you grab it. Going back to your desk, you open it to see all the sketches and drawings that you made. To free your mind, you used to paint something, and every time you're drawing, it feels like a dream. You wish you could become a famous artist who has done a lot of art. But deep down, you know the opinion of your parents. They were strict about your future. For them, you needed to become a doctor or a lawyer. Everything under that must be powerful as well, or you failed your whole life. Last time you had a conversation about going to an art school, you ended up with house arrest. That's also the reason why you need to hide everything related to that. With the knowledge that nobody is home, you start sketching.
You flinch with the phone ringing. The first reaction is hiding everything on your desk. You put everything in your box. After closing it, you put it back under your bed. The person who calls you cut the line. Getting your phone, you see that Jungkook was calling you. There is no way to explain the relief that you were feeling. Dropping on your knees, you almost cried. Why would you feel that way? How unfair it is that you have parents who are not supportive of you. The next thing you hear is something on your window. Turning your head, you scream in fear. Only to see Jungkook screaming too. You throw your phone on the bed and walk to the window, opening it. "What are you doing?!" you say while pulling him inside by his sleeve.
"Oh, hi pretty," he says with a grin. He can't be serious, right? You roll your eyes. "You scared me. Also, I have a door." He scoffs at you, "But it's not that dramatic! I'm here to go to the basketball game with you. You can't say no; I climbed up the window!". You look at him unimpressed. "I would also come with you when you just knocked on my door." He has a stupid smile on his face while saying, "So you would go everywhere with me without a doubt?"
You ignore his cheesy question and walk to your wardrobe. Opening it, you are thinking of what to wear. A black hoodie and some black jeans are a safe option. Jungkook is busy looking around your room. It was his first time being here. You had a minimalistic room with the colors of white, beige, and blue. Walking to the wall next to your desk, he looked at the pictures with your friends. "We never took a picture together. Let's do it today," he says. There was an old picture of you, and he takes a quick picture of it. 'Cute,' he thinks. Turning towards you, he sees that you are getting changed. He looks away; he didn't want to be a creep.
After changing, you both walk out of the house. The basketball court was not that far, so you agreed on walking. "Do you think I will win?" he asks. "I never saw you play, so it's hard to say. Tae is actually really good," you say. Jungkook laughs at you, "He lost all the games when we were playing. I'm just telling you so that you don't lose your bet." You think about it for a while: "Okay, I will trust you, but if I lose my money today, you owe me!". He just smiles. Is it normal for him to feel shy all of a sudden? He needs to win; there is no other option.
The match was almost over. Jungkook played with Jiho, and Tae asked a random dude to play with him, so it's fair. Unfortunately, it didn't change the results; they lost. Jia was the one taking a bet for him, so she cursed the shit out of him. While you run to Jungkook to celebrate his win. You both are holding each other's hands and spinning in circles. Yeah, you know you looked like two kids, but it was fun. "Omg, let's stop. I think I need to throw up," you scream at him. He stops immediately and laughs at you trying to balance. "I told you I would win!" he says. You smile at him. Wow, what is this feeling inside you?
All of you are sitting on the grass next to the court. The boys sipping water and Jia handing you the money she lost. You wave it a little in the air. The guy playing with Tae, Damien, stands up. "It was nice to meet you, but I need to go home. Maybe we could play someday again," he says while looking at everyone. "Yeah, sure, it was fun! Thank you for joining us," Tae says. Damien smiles at that and turns to you, "I would like to grab a coffee with you." You look up at him in confusion. He didn't expect an answer from you, so he gives you a piece of paper with his phone number on it. You take it with a little thank you. He walks away afterwards. Turning to your friends, you see Jungkook's eyes boring into your sides. The whole situation is forgotten as Jiho stands up and says, "Let's go eat. I will die".
Walking to the next ramen place, you notice how quiet Jungkook is. You poke his side. "What's wrong? You won a game, bro." Jungkook pouts at you and asks, "Why did you accept his number?". "I accept it from every guy because I'm too scared of their reaction when I don't accept it. Maybe they would curse me out or follow me home? So creepy," you say with a sincere tone. He looks into your eyes. "I'm sorry that you feel that way. So are you interested in meeting him?". He is playing with his lip piercing; why is he getting so nervous? "Nope, he was not my type," you say with a grin. "But why are you asking and sulking about it anyway? Wait, are you jealous?" you ask while laughing. Yup, he feels a burn on his face. You pinch his cheeks, "So cute." Jungkook wants to fall on his knees and cry. But he acts annoyed, saying, "Fuck off," and wishing you would never do that.
–
2 months later...
Your head is on the table. Jungkook, Tae, and you were learning at the cafe for over 6 hours. You understand more than before, but your head was seconds away from exploding. Tae is in better condition. "I told you to drink more soju. Look at me; I feel like a newborn," he says. You whine at that, "Shut up, please." Jungkook comes back to the table with a tray in his hand. He ordered some ramen and vegetables. Sitting next to you, he strokes your hair. "Come on, eat your food, and you will feel better," he says softly. You sit up looking at the food; you don't feel like eating. Until something is next to your mouth, you turn to Jungkook, who is holding broccoli in his chopsticks for you to eat. You pout and eat it. "Hmm, yummy, right?" he says in awe. You really liked it, so you nod while starting to eat. Turning to him, you see him eat with the same chopsticks that you ate from. That makes you smile. And of course he caught that.
Jungkook is happy that you finished your bowl. Now they are waiting for you to come back from the bathroom. He carefully packs some of your belongings into your bag. Tae is watching him the whole time. "I am worried about you," he says. Jungkook looks at him confused. "You know what I mean. Your feelings with Yn," says Tae while looking into his eyes. If there was a chance for Jungkook to flee, he would. But Tae didn't expect an answer or explanation. "I don't want you to get hurt. If you need to talk about it, I will listen," he simply says. Jungkook is shocked but also thankful that he gave him the option to open up or not. He returns Tae's smile.
"Why are you flirting?" you say, looking at both of them. Tae acts like putting a strand of hair behind his ear. "Oh my God, we will go on a date tomorrow!". You laugh, but the fact that Jungkook is too stunned to speak made it even funnier. Jungkook shakes his head and gives you your bag. "Come on, let's go." "Wait, why are you blushing?" you ask. That is the last straw for you and Tae to laugh like fools. Jungkook makes a quick 'tsk' before leaving. You are in tears.
Tae is the first one to get off the tram, bidding both of you a good night. You wave at him. Some minutes later, it is yours and Jungkook's turn to get off. While walking home, you intentionally bump into Jungkook's side. "Are you mad at my comment?" you ask. Jungkook chuckled at that. "No, all good. I know you were jealous," he says. "Woah, you're really delulu," you say dramatically. "Thank you for today, by the way. I did understand a lot. You're really good at explaining!" you add. He smiles and pokes your cheek. "No need to thank me. We can do it more often, but not that intensely. I thought you would die." You stick out your tongue.
"Omg, Jungkook! Look," you say, kneeling down. You start petting the black cat. It is fluffy and super soft. Jungkook takes a picture of you where you are petting the cat. "I want two cats when I move out!" you say, excited. He wants to cuddle with you and the cat. "So you're a cat person. How cute," he says, smiling. "Thank God this one has a home. Look, it has a collar," you say while turning to him. "Maybe it is on his way home," he thinks out loud. You stand up and watch the cat go. "It was so cute, I want to cry," you say, head hanging. He wants to remember this moment forever. Your interaction with the cat, your pout, and your small voice. If he were to die right now, he would be happy.
Walking up the stairs, you see Jungkook standing at the same spot. "Why aren't you going home?" you ask, looking down. "I will wait until you're inside," he says, shrugging. You wave at him for the last time before your door closes behind you. Jungkook walks in the direction of his house but changes his mind. Turning around, he is walking to the next supermarket.
It is suspiciously quiet in your house. After hanging your jacket and putting on your slippers, you walk towards your room. The TV is turned on, but nobody is sitting in front of it. You feel your heart beating faster when you see your open door. Trying to think positively about it, you walk in. Your room looks like a mess. Everything is shattered, and your mother is in a panic. "What is going on here?" you ask quietly. Only when your father turns around do you see your drawings in his hands. Your bag choosing his own fate by rolling down your arm. There are no words to say. Looking into his eyes, you can see the anger.
"What's all of this?" he asks while shouting. "I told you that I'm interested in art. I just sketch or paint when I need to relax," you try to reason. It will not help; they will never understand you. You don't know which part of your answer made him explode, but in seconds he starts ripping all of the papers. "How stupid of me to think that you grew up! Doing this shit instead of studying! Where are the other things? Tell me!" he screams and walks around the room. Your knees give up, and sitting on the floor, you start crying. Taking some pieces of your art while he is destroying everything in your room. Your eyes wander to the open door, your sister standing in the hall with a bowl full of cherries. She is enjoying this. "Look at your sister! She is working hard to get somewhere, and you! How can you be that stupid?" says your mother. Just as angry as your dad. You want to scream, to throw a tantrum, but everything cut off your air. How could this happen? Your dad comes up to you, forcing you to stand up. "You will tell me where all of your stuff is," he yells in your face. "I did nothing wrong," you sob. It's unfair, you want to say. But your head is like under water. Too many thoughts, but no voice. "How dare you talk back to me?" he asks. The next thing you could feel is a burn and pain in your cheek. He slapped you. You could feel the metallic taste in your mouth. For a second, everyone is shocked. But who would he be when he apologized? Instead, he grabs your arm and walks towards the door. "If you don't want to live with our rules, then you can go live elsewhere," he screams. The door shuts in front of your face.
You stand there for a while. Your mother or sister would open the door for you, right? But after minutes that felt like hours, you turn around. They will not open the door. Walking down the stairs, you feel empty. By the time it started raining, you looked down. You are wearing some slippers and have no jacket. In your hands are some pieces of paper that you called art. There is nothing in your mind; you just start walking. The rain is fast in soaking you wet. Near a park, you see a bench. No time to think about it more; you sit down. You look down at the pieces of paper and at the bloodstains caused by the rain that is rinsing your face. Empty was the definition of what you are feeling. The cold air makes it worse than it is. You pull your knees to your chest and bury your face on top of them. Crying felt more painful than before. Also, you are scared that some creep would come near, but you have no energy to move.
Jungkook hates his decision to go grab some things from the supermarket. He was at the supermarket, but not only there; he also made a stop at the bookstore. He bought two new books and was ready to gift you one. Walking back home, he curses at himself for not getting an umbrella. Near the park, he sees a girl sitting on a bench. He looks at her and wonders why she would be sitting in the rain with only a shirt and slippers. At the same time, you look up at the noise of footsteps. The last person you both expected to see was each other. Jungkook looks at your face; the first thing he notices is the cut in your lip. That was enough for him to run towards you. Kneeling down on the ground, he holds your face with both hands.
"What happened?" he asks while being consumed by angst. Your small hands hold his wrists. You couldn't answer his question; you are sobbing and shaking from the cold. He starts taking off his jacket and helps you put it on. "Do you want to go home?" he asks while stroking your hair. Jungkook never experienced something like that. He wants to kill everyone who was the reason for your situation. Also, he doesn't want to hurt you more, but he is scared. Scared of the reason you were in this situation. "I can't go home," you say, trying to wipe away your tears. "Let's go to my house," he asks. Unsure if he would scare you away. But you only nod. He turns around. "Piggyback," he says, and waits. You position yourself, and he stands up to walk to his house.
After a quick walk, he gets into the house. Letting you down carefully, he walks to his room to get you some dry clothes. When he comes back, you already start changing. You smile at his oversized black shirt and sleeping shorts. Getting the white socks, you start laughing. Jungkook turned to you while making tea. "You really wear toe socks?" you ask cutely. He smiled, "They're really comfortable!". It was weird wearing those, but you felt comfortable. He comes back with two cups, giving you one. "Thank you," you say, taking a sip. "I will go change quickly, okay?" he asks. You nod, drinking from your tea. You feel warmed up, but you know that you will have a cold tomorrow. Jungkook comes back wearing similar clothes as you. He smiles at you and gives you a blanket. Leaving once again to get the first aid kit.
Hugging the blanket, you turn to him. "I had an argument with my family," you say. He sits next to you, listening carefully. "You know, I wanted to go to an art school. I love drawing and everything about art. My family was against it. They want me to become something high. Don't ask me why they think being an artist is low or bad. Anyway, the first time we had that argument, like two years ago, I had house arrest. And yes, I am stubborn, and I didn't stop drawing. Today they found my box with all the sketches. My father turned red. He ripped them into pieces, and when I told him that I hadn't made a mistake, he slapped me. Oh, and he threw me out. " You could feel a tear escaping from your eye. Jungkook is quick; he pads the tear away with a broken smile. "I mean, they are my family. Why can't they accept me with my interests and opinions? Is it that wrong to have dreams? I don't get it; I just want to be loved. Is that too much to ask for?" Your voice sounds whiny. You lean your head against the armrest and cry. "You don't need to question yourself. Of course, it is normal to have expectations of your parents. It's their fault if they're not supporting you. And I know maybe it's easier to say than to do, but you shouldn't give up on your dreams because of them. You're a person who can decide what to do with your own life," he says while playing with your hair. You turn your head to look at him. "Thank you for being with me. I really appreciate it." He smiles at that. "No need to thank me. I will always support you." You sigh and say, "Jungkook, you're leaving in three months. It makes me more sad." Jungkook doesn't want to think about it. "Come here. Let's clean your wound first and then blow-dry your hair," he just says. He is gentle while cleaning your wound, and he also helps you blow-dry your hair.
"Do you feel a little better?" he asks, watching the way you look around. You hum, "I like your home! You put a lot of effort into it." Jungkook smiles at your voice. "Thank you," he says. You come back to him, sitting next to him. Awfully cute, he thinks. You know it will make everything more complicated, but you cuddled up to him and closed your eyes. He welcomes you into his arms. Playing with your hair to make you fall asleep. He couldn't help thinking about your family. It makes him so angry to know that they were treating you like that. He wished he could protect you from everyone.
–
The next morning feels worse than the last night. A headache is bothering you, and you are freezing. You get up from your lying position, looking around. Last night you fell asleep on the couch, and now you're lying on the bed. Jungkook is nowhere to be seen. Standing up, you walk to the living room, which also has the kitchen built in. Opening the door, you can smell some delicious food. Jungkook is cooking something and looks really serious in the process.
"Good morning," you say, pouting at your own voice. Jungkook smiles at you, "Good morning. You did catch a cold, right? Poor baby, come here; I cooked some soup." You walk to the table and sit down. "It's so cold," you say while holding the bowl he was giving you. He sits in front of you. "I hope the soup will warm you up a bit," he adds. For the record, the soup looks delicious and smells like a dream. Without a doubt, you eat it up.
"They asked about us in the group chat, and I told them that you're sick," he says after eating up as well. Only now do you realize that your phone is in your bag at home. Also, it was Monday. Monday is a school day. Your mouth hangs open now. "Oh my god, I totally forgot about school. Why are you here? You should go," you say, frowning. He simply looks at you disgustingly. "You really thought I would leave like this?". You shrug. Jungkook stands up to clean the table and starts to hum a song. That is a good moment for you to go to the bathroom and wash up. Peeking out of the bathroom, you ask him, "Is it okay for you when I take a quick shower?". He turns to look at you. "Yes, of course. In the closet, you can find some fresh towels."
After a quick shower, you come out to find him lying on the couch. You lay down, your head next to his stomach. Thinking about what you want to do. You can't stay here forever; your family will look for you. "I will go home later," you say quietly. He is watching you the whole time. "Are you sure? You can stay here as long as you want," he says, stopping his hand to find your hair. "Thank you for letting me stay. But I need to talk to them someday. Maybe I can move out?" You look up in his direction. "Yeah, maybe that's the best for you and your family. Maybe you need some time alone without them. But are you really going to change your dreams?" he asks hesitantly. "I don't know. I want to become an artist so bad," you say, feeling the urge to cry. "Look, my parents want me to become something important too. But I want to be a basketball player. I will do everything to make it," he says, smiling. "You sit up and show your pinky finger. "Let's make a promise. I will become an artist, and you will be a professional basketball player." He shows his pinky finger too and says, "Promise." So you make a pinky promise. He wants to hold your hand forever.
The knocking on the door made both of your heads look in the direction. Your fingers are no longer in a hug. "Aaah, I forgot to tell you that the others wanted to come over. After hearing that you're sick," Jungkook says while smiling with his teeth, He stands up to open the door, and the first one running in is Tae. "Yn, I missed you so much! Are you feeling better?" he asks you right away. You laugh at his words. "I missed you too! And yes, I feel a lot better." Jia puts some snacks on the table, and Jiho's eyes are going between you and Jungkook. "Jiho, no need to look like that. It's not just me having a cold. I had an argument with my parents," you say, knowing he would state some stupid shit. All of them sit down to listen to you.
After telling them the whole story without the part when your father slapped you because you're too embarrassed, they looked sad and angry at the same time. "Girl, you're really talented, and I don't think you should give up because of them," Jia says. Jiho and Tae quickly agree. "You can talk to them, and if they don't listen, their loss. We can organize a small apartment to live in." Tae suggests. "I don't know about that. I want to move out, but no money, dude," you say, trying to be realistic. "We can be roommates if you want. Those dorms will let us in, right?" Jia says hopefully. You nod. "You're right; we could try that. But don't feel like you need to do that. I can move in with some random girl." Jia rolls her eyes. "Come on, you know I hate living with my brothers. I was thinking about moving out too." You give her a flying kiss. "You know we can send your dad sketches as a letter," Tae says, like he had the best idea in the world. All of you started laughing. "He would kill us," you say while laughing. "Thank you for being my friends," you say after a while. Is it normal that Jungkook is hearing the word 'friends' echoed?
–
Jungkook is walking you home. He wished you could stay a little longer, but he knows that you need to talk to them. Back at Jungkook's place, you guys did some research about a dorm and the chances of a room in the middle of the school year. Luck was never on your side. The next free room was at the end of the year. So you wanted to talk to your parents about it and spend the rest of the school year at home until you can move to the dorm. In front of your house, Jungkook turns to you and says, "If anything happens, you just need to look out of your window. I will wait here a bit." You don't know what to say. He is caring a lot for you, and you don't know what to think about the meaning behind it. It's just that you feel special when he talks to you. "Thank you. I will inform you about everything. Don't worry!" you say while walking up the stairs. Jungkook walks over to stand under your window. He would burn the house down if your father tried to hurt you again.
You knock on the door, already hearing some steps. The door is opened by your sister. "So you came back," she says, trying to provoke you. The funniest girl, you thought. You walk in, knowing your parents would sit in the living room. Your mother is the first one to notice your presence. "There you are! I know you would come and apologize to your father," she says, a little too happy. You can't control your laughter. "No, I'm not here to apologize, mother. I just came back because I live here. And I don't want to live like you want me to. If you don't like my decisions and dreams, it's your problem. I can live with the fact that you will never support me. If you want, you can act like I died and whatever. I will move out at the end of the school year anyway and will live for my dreams."
The room is silent for a while. Your father turns to you and says, "I knew you would never become someone big. It was my fault for not seeing how stupid you are. Do whatever you want! At the end, you will come and beg me to help you out. And on that day I will laugh in your face. Just wait for it. Oh, and I will count the days until you're out of this house. You can go find a husband or a dorm; I don't care anymore," he says, venom in his voice. He really thinks he won? It is a win for you.
Turning back to your room, you look out of your window. Jungkook is standing there with a straight face. You quickly grab your phone from your bag and take a picture.
YN: Someone is watching me -.-
You see him looking around.
Kook: There is no one?
YN: [picture send] Looook :(
Jungkook looks up.
Kook: Omg, he is so good-looking 😍
You laugh at that.
YN: Jokes aside, I'm good. You can go home🙂↕️
Kook: Want to talk about it?
YN: Let's Facetime while u walk home
You quickly call him on FaceTime. Letting him stay on your desk while you try to fix your room. You tell him everything you and your father said. "I'm proud of you that you told him right away," he says while watching you move around. "Thanks. Can you see my room? It's such a mess. What was his intention, man?" you ask him while standing in the middle of it. Not knowing where to start. He is actually sad seeing your room in that condition. The last time he came, it was calming. "Yeah, I can help you tomorrow if you want," he suggests. "Nah, no need; I will throw away the stuff," you say. He watches you throw a lot of stuff into a plastic bag the same size as you.
Jungkook is already home, but you are in the flow of cleaning up, so he starts to clean up too. When both of you are done, it is already 2 am. You lay down on your bed with your phone. It didn't last long until you fell asleep. Jungkook comes back to his phone after realizing that you're not answering. He sees you sleeping and smiles. Okay, he takes a screenshot. Wishing you a good night, he hung up.
–
2 months later...
The time passed quickly. Now there are only four weeks left until Jungkook is returning home. You spent all day together, sometimes just the two of you, other times with your friends. Not only Tae, but all of your friends could see that Jungkook had obvious feelings for you. You were good at hiding what you felt.
It is almost 11 p.m., and you are working on your sketch. To be honest, you have been working on this one for weeks. You want to give it to Jungkook as a gift. It was a portrait of him wearing his favorite basketball team's jersey. The number '97' on the front side. The cozy mood in your room shifted when you heard your phone ringing. You sigh and pick up. "What do you want, Tae?". "Yn, could you come and pick us up? We are soooo full of drinks that it is cra-," he says while burping at the end. "Who are we?" you ask. You could hear the music in the back.
"Me and Jungkook silly," he says, laughing. Did you hear him right? Jungkook never told you about going out tonight. "Send me your location," you say, not waiting for a response. You hang up. You change into a pair of jeans and a tight black top. Getting your purse, you walk out of the house. Walking to the next taxi point, you check out the location. Fortunately, it was not that far away.
You step out of the car and walk into the location. It is a really crowded bar. You should wear something else and dance a little. Walking through the people with a small 'excuse me,' you give your best looking for them. In one corner, you see both of them with pretty girls around. Oh, okay, someone has fun; you thought watching Jungkook. He feels a burning stare on his face and immediately turns in your direction. You never saw him that drunk. He is waving at you with puppy eyes and a big smile. For a minute, you feel like a sky full of stars. You walk to them to stand in front of the table. Tapping your feet on the floor, you say, "What is going on here?" Tae gets scared and stops talking to the girl next to him. "It was so boring without you," Jungkook says, trying to reach your hand. Cute, you thought. The girls are not that happy about your arrival. You turn to one of them. "Sorry to interrupt, but I need to take them home." Surprisingly, she is kind and left with the other girls. "And you both! Follow me," you say, trying to look dangerous. You walk to the door, and after looking over your shoulder, you see that they are following you with their heads down. Oh, you totally feel like their mother.
Outside, you look at both of them. "Let's wait here for a taxi," you say. Then you decide to bring both of them to a wall on which they could lean. They are drunk as fuck. And of course there are no taxis around. You sigh in annoyance. "Can you both walk? There is no taxi; all are full. Maybe we could grab a coffee somewhere and go with a bus?" you suggest. "I'm fine; let's go," Jungkook says with a smirk. You want to rip that out of his face because you're melting. You stand in the middle of both, Tae holding one of your arms and Jungkook acting like he is totally fine. You guys start to walk down the street.
After ten minutes, you see an open cafe. You turn to Jungkook, "I will grab some coffee. Stay here with Tae, okay? You guys can also sit down on the sidewalk," you say. He nods his head, watching you walk in. "Look at those; they are laughing at us," Tae says while looking at a group of men. Jungkook looks in their direction. The group of men stopped talking and turned fully to them. "What are you looking at?" one of them says. "You're laughing at us!" Tae says. All of the men start laughing. "Come on, stupid boy, turn around. Your ugly face is giving me a hard time," another man says. "Who are you calling ugly?" Jungkook says, walking in the direction. At this moment, you walk out with two coffee cups in your hand. You are shocked to see that some of the men are walking towards Jungkook and that Jungkook and Tae are walking to the men. "You little shit, I will fuck you up," the man says. That is a clear signal for you to cut in.
"I'm so sorry, please stop this," you say while walking to Tae. Jungkook gives you a side eye. Not liking the fact that you apologized. "Go to the side, lady, if you don't want to get hurt," the shorter man says. "Who are you to talk to her like that?" Tae says. Jungkook was ready to throw a punch. You watch all the men standing there. There are five people, and you would count Jungkook and Tae as one person due to the fact that they were drunk. Without thinking much, you throw both of the coffee cups in the direction of the men. A loud gasp is heard from them. The coffee was hot. You turn to Jungkook and Tae and scream, "Run!".
You never ran away like this. The group of men is hot on your tracks. You feel like passing out at any moment. The energy is leaving your body. Jungkook notices that and holds your hand to pull you with him. After a run into small alleys, you stop. They lost you. Jungkook leans on the wall. Tae is sitting on the floor, and you are holding your knees. All of you needed a moment to catch your breath. When you look at both of them, you start laughing. It is so loud that an old woman opened her window to yell at you. With that, you walk away.
On your way, you finally found a taxi. Firstly, you made a stop at Tae's house. You help him get inside. Returning to the taxi, you give Jungkook's address. He is leaning against the window with a big smile. You look at him in question. "Are you mad at me?" he asks. He stopped smiling and looked like he was seconds away from crying. "Why should I?" you ask back. "I didn't know that he wanted to go to a bar. I would tell you. You know that, right?" He reaches for your hand. Now he is playing with your fingers. "Don't worry, I know you would tell me. I was just a little shocked," you say while smiling at him.
The car stops in front of his house, so you head out and help him get into the house. He sits down on the couch, and you help him get out of his shoes. "Next time when you go to a bar, you shouldn't drink that much. You both did! What would you do if nobody could get you?" you scold him. "I swear I said just one glass, and then he said, don't be a pussycat; drink more," Jungkook says. You look at him annoyed, "Wow, so smart of you." After helping him take off his shirt, you ask, "What were you guys talking about with the girls?". He scrunches his nose and replies, "Nothing; they were bubbling. Why are you asking?". You hum and toss the clean shirt in his face. "Ouch!" he says, still catching it. "Oh, sorry, I thought you saw me throwing it," you say. "Noooo, you're jealous!" he says after putting the shirt on. He quickly changes his jeans into black jogging pants. "I'm not jealous," you say. "I don't believe you! Don't worry, baby, you will be my number one forever," he says while wiggling his eyebrows. "Oh, shut up. Come on, go do your nightly routine, and then go sleep," you say after tossing the clothes that he took off into the laundry basket. "But you will stay here, right?" he asks with puppy eyes. You nod and smile at him.
After his nightly routine, Jungkook went to bed and fell asleep in the same second his head touched the pillow. You watch him from the doorframe. A little sad about the fact that he is leaving soon. You wish he would stay forever. Also, you do know that you two had a different bond than with the others. But nothing precious like this lasts forever, right?
–
It was early in the morning, and you were standing in Jungkook's kitchen. You were never good at cooking, but today you want to top your own skills. Tasting the soup, you scrunch your face. Yeah, you should do a favor for everyone and never cook again. You add some seasoning to make it more tasty. It is weird to feel that much like it's your own home. The thought of this ending soon makes you sad.
You are in your thoughts when Jungkook comes out of his room, his feet sweeping the whole floor. You turn around and watch his tired face until he looks up to meet you. He immediately starts smiling, "I thought you left." You gasp, "I was cooking for you! Come eat some, and then you can take some painkillers," you add. Jungkook rushes to his chair and starts eating. "You don't want to eat?" he asks you. You just shook your head. "Nope, I will meet Jia later. We have a girls date." He nods. Watching him eat was enough for you to light up your mood.
"Why did Tae want to go to a bar?" you ask while cleaning the space you used for cooking. He is done with eating. "I don't know; he told me he felt like it," he answers. It would be a lie if he said that he is not scared of your opinion about him now. The last thing he wants is for you to get a false impression of him. You walk towards him and hand him the painkillers with a glass of water. He gives you a flying kiss and swallows. "I need to go now. You can rest a bit," you suggest. Jungkook looks at you with puppy eyes. "Have fun," he says. You waved at him and left the apartment.
After doing his morning routine, Jungkook sits down with a paper and a pen. If anyone were to tell him that he was going to write a letter, he would definitely laugh at that. But no, it was the truth. He was shy to say the thoughts he had in his head, and he was a better writer. So why not write a letter about his feelings? He starts writing, and it got longer than he expected. After some hours, he finishes writing and looks around. Of course he needed to rewrite the letter over and over again. So he stands up and throws the scattered papers away. On his way back, he gets an envelope to put his letter in. Will he ever be able to give it to you?
–
11:30 PM
Jungkook wakes up from his sleep. His phone is vibrating the whole time. He doesn't know when he fell asleep. Sitting up, he gets his phone and sees missed calls and messages from you. He feels nervous scrolling through the messages.
Yn: I think I'm in trouble?!?!?!
Yn: Could you maybe pick us up?
Yn: I guess you're asleep. Sorry for disturbing.
He didn't waste more time reading all of your messages; instead, he called you right away. It took you longer to answer, and he didn't even realize that he was holding his breath. "Omg, Jungkook?!" you ask, out of breath. "What happened? Are you okay? I fell asleep, so I didn't see your messages," he asks. You sigh and add, "Sorry, I didn't mean to make you worry. We got in trouble with some guys. We're at the hospital right now. But we're okay! Jiho is on the way." Jungkook stands up and walks to the door. "I'm coming," he says while rushing down the stairs. You could hear him running.
"Thank you for coming, Jiho," Jia says. You could see that she was tired. "Jiho, could you bring her home? I will walk; it's not that far," you ask him. "Is Jungkook coming?" he asks back. "Yes, he was on his way. I will walk with him; don't worry," you say and wave at them. At the same time, you see Jungkook rushing towards you. You try to smile because you know he would scold you a little.
"Omg, what happened?" he asks right away. "Good night to you too," you say, half joking. You pull him with you while walking home. "We just had an argument with some dudes. They were bullying a young boy, so we tried to help him. But they were a little drunk and started to push us. Then the police came out of nowhere, and we escaped without realizing that we didn't do anything wrong. That's it," you say nonchalantly. He looks at you in shock. "Did you get hurt? Why would you run away?!" he asks while checking up on you. "I just scratched my arm because I felt down. But it doesn't hurt anymore," you say, holding his wrist. "Yn! It's so dangerous to get into an argument with strangers. Why would you do that?!". "Oh, come on, Jungkook! I just wanted to help that poor boy!" you say, scoffing. He looks at you like, 'Oh, really?' "You could call the police," he says. Yes, you could, but in that moment everything happened so fast that you forgot to think about it.
"Stop scolding me! I will never call you again," you say, getting mad at him. "Oh, come on! You know that I'm right. I'm just thinking about you. Show me your injury," he says a little softer. "I don't want to," you say, pouting at him. He starts stroking your hair. "Come on. I'm just worried about you, and I don't want you to get hurt." You give him a side eye. "Next time call me and I'll show them what it is to argue with you," he says, wiggling his eyebrows. It's his way of making you laugh by saying random things. You just want him to go on and see his limits. "I'm getting sad. Are you ignoring me for real? Did I say something wrong? That wasn't my intention. I just got scared, and also I don't want to come to the hospital and see you in other conditions," he says, looking at his shoes. "I'm not mad! I just wanted to give you the silent treatment. I know that it was stupid to get into a fight with them. That was the last time. We were a little stupid, I promise," you say, patting his head. He immediately smiles up. It was nice to know someone cared for you.
–
School days are always boring and tiring. Today is exactly the same way. You and your friends are sitting in the school cafeteria because of the one lesson where the teacher was sick and you guys had study time for your own. You are drinking mango juice while taking notes for the next lesson. "Did you look for some colleges to go to after finals?" Jia asks. Tae scoffs at the question, "Why is everyone asking that? My parents also started talking about it, and I really feel nervous." You pat his back with a sad smile. "I'm interested in laws, maybe in that area something," Jiho says. To be honest, you are thinking about this question a lot because you know you have to deal with your parents. You had a lot of discussions with them, and you know their opinions will never change, but it felt like a big stone in front of your dreams. It's hard to go on a lonely journey without them, and you're scared that things will turn out differently than expected. Jungkook notices that you were deep in thought, so he slightly taps your arm. Turning towards him, you smile softly. "What about you? Art, is it right?" he asks and tilts his head, remembering the pinky promise. "I'm not sure about it," you answer honestly. The other three are deep in conversation, so it feels a little easier to open up. "What's that supposed to mean? I thought it was a big dream of yours," he says, looking a little confused. "Yeah, it is. But I'm not ready to deal with my family, I guess.".
"You know it's your life, and nobody should dig into it. Why would you give up your dream for them? I know they're family, but at the end of the day, you can try what you dream of." He is looking into your eyes with hope. "It's easy for you to say so, Jungkook. I've been dealing with them for over five years about this topic. It was not allowed to own things based on art. Do you really think they will be okay with it? I know I told them that I would move out and live my dream. But I don't know what if I'm the only one thinking it is worth it? Sometimes I overthink about it. At the end, my decision is my dream, but I'm also confused." you say with a straight face. "Look, I know what you mean, but if you go to that college, they will accept it at the end of the day, and you're thinking too much about it," he says. "No, they will not. They will wait for a moment to see me fall so that they can say we told you. And you know they would never offer me a helping hand. If I go for my dreams, I will lose them. And this doesn't even sound scary. I would be okay with that now, but will I be in the future?" you say while shaking your head. "Ah, come on, that's too dramatic. You need to take a risk sometimes. I also have the feeling that you're scared. Why don't you trust your skills?
Don't be a chicken and be scared of a new way!". He is scolding you for your words.
It is strange to feel hurt by that because he was trying to give you some courage. You also don't know why the next words come out like that. "Sorry that I'm scared to be alone and confused about my future. I wish my parents would be like yours, sending me to other cities and countries for my dreams. We are not on the same boat, Jungkook." His words feel like salt over a wound. How pathetic! You need to give up all your dreams for your parents, and other parents would give up everything to fulfill their children's dreams. Jungkook is stunned to say anything; it totally took him off. You gather your things and thoughts. "I need some books at the library; see you in class" are your last words before leaving. Jungkook watches you and turns to his friends, who are looking at him questioningly. "What happened?" Tae asks. "I think I crossed a line without realizing." He could feel a sting in his chest. It never was his intention to hurt you or make you feel uncomfortable.
Jungkook wanted to talk to you again, but you were busy doing other stuff. Ignoring him till the end of the school day and also disappearing on the way home. For him, it feels like weight.
–
"Oh, come on, man, slow down," Tae says while trying to get the bottle in Jungkook's hand. "I texted her, and she didn't even respond to me. She will never talk to me again? Fuck, I never thought I would make her feel hurt," he responds. The boys met for a drinking session, and he was already tipsy.
"Bro, maybe she wanted to think it over before talking with you. She does that a lot. You know we had a lot of arguments, and she never ghosted me," Jiho says with a little smile. Jungkook finishes his glass full of soju. "I don't know," he says. He will try every chance to talk to you again, but he feels like shit knowing that he hurt you. "You can buy something really big for her birthday! It's on the weekend, remember?" Tae suggests. Jungkook freezes on his spot. "Her birthday?" he asks. "Yeah, on Saturday," Jiho answers. "She will not invite me to her birthday, right?" he cries out. Both men are shocked and watch his little tantrum. "I will go and talk to her," Jungkook says while getting up. Tae tries to stop him, but it isn't working. He is already on his way to you.
You are brushing your hair after a shower and also think about the conversation with Jungkook. Yeah, you totally overreacted because he never wanted to make you feel bad or anything like that. You decide to talk to him tomorrow and tell him that you're a little sensitive and that you are sorry for the reaction. After finishing your nightly routine, you walk to your bed. At that moment, someone familiar opens the window and crawls in. You are so shocked that nothing comes out of your mouth, and you grab a pillow to throw it at him. Jungkook looks up to meet your eyes.
"Oh my god, are you crazy?!" you whisper at him. "Hi," he says with a lazy grin. "You are not answering my messages, so I needed to reach out," he adds. "I wanted to talk to you in person tomorrow, dummy," you answer. You walk to the door and lock it. Turning back, you sit down in front of him. "Look, I know I hurt you, but that was never my intention. I just wanted to help you make a decision. But I know it's not okay to say you're a chick. You're not! I should empathize more. I can understand if you don't want to talk to me, but give me a chance. Hmm, I will do everything you want! Maybe I could buy you so-" He starts talking, but you cut him off with your hand on his mouth. "I'm sorry I overreacted a little bit. You know I'm really sensitive with this topic because everything seems like a burden to me. But I never forget our pinky promise. Don't worry," you say and reach for his hand. He watches the way you are holding his hand and moving your thumb up and down. "No, I'm sorry. I wanted to make you feel better and feel supported, but it was the wrong way. I know how hard it is for you. How you're struggling with them. You feel little with them, right?" He is looking straight into your eyes. You could feel the tears threatening. "I feel lonely," you confess, and a little tear escapes your eye. He is quick enough to catch your tear with his fingers. "I will be here for you," he says. "You're leaving soon," you reply. "I love you," he says with a smile. "You're drunk" is the only thing you could say. "Maybe! But my feelings will not change because of alcohol," he whispers. Maybe it was like a promise. It wasn't easy to hold onto that because knowing that all of this will end soon made you feel sick.
For a moment you want to hold the time and forget everything else. You lean forward to kiss him. He caught that quick and also leaned in. Kissing him felt like a new wave of hope. He is holding your cheek to deepen. After some seconds, you pull away to catch your breath. Jungkook smiles at you and kisses your cheek. "Come on, drink first, and after that, we can sleep on my bed," you say while standing up. Jungkook sits down on the bed waiting for you. On your desk is a cup of water that you hand him. He drinks all of it while looking at you. It makes you nervous, and you couldn't hold your laugh. "You're cute when you're drunk," you say. He pouts at you, "Just when I'm drunk?". You help him lay down and take your own spot. Jungkook pulls you into his arms and starts stroking your hair. Tonight, after a long time, is the first time that you fell asleep right away. And your sleep was actually good.
–
The next morning came fast. You are the first one to open your eyes, watching him in his peaceful sleep. You start playing with his soft hair. If there was a chance of a wish for you, you would wish for him to stay with you. But you're not selfish enough to ask him to stay. Would he consider that anyway? You watch him open his eyes and look around before finding yours. He smiles at you lazily and brushes one strand of hair behind your ear. His movements are soft, and you want more.
"Did you sleep well?" you ask him while sitting up. He is holding your hand and nods. "I would like to offer you breakfast, but if my parents see you, we are both dead," you say. Jungkook finally sits up and pats your head. "All good. I will wait for you on the bench so we can go to school." You nod and stand up to go to the bathroom. He didn't want to let go of your hand, but he gave up soon. After finishing your routine, it was Jungkook's turn. You start to change your clothes when Jungkook finishes his job. He froze on his spot when he caught you without your sleeping shorts. It didn't take him long to turn around and quickly say, "Sorry." You laugh at that and try to hide your red cheeks that you got. When you're done, Jungkook escapes from the window, and you prepare two sandwiches for the way.
As promised, he is waiting on the bench with a big smile. "Here, I made you a sandwich," you say while offering. He takes a bite without taking it from you. You watch his face getting angry. Yep, that is a good sign. Then he takes it from your hand and starts eating.
–
It was Thursday, and Jungkook was five seconds away from getting on his knees to cry. Tae is holding his arm because he knows what will happen when Jungkook stops you. For the record, it was after school, and everyone wanted to go on a shopping trip, but without you. The reason was obvious: your birthday presents. And of course you asked them if they wanted to grab a boba with you. They needed to make some weird excuses, and your face changed into a sad expression. As you walked away while saying, "Okay, I will go alone and see you tomorrow," Jungkook was ready to call you back. Jia turns to the men standing next to her and says, "I will go with her. I bought my present a long time ago." She is rushing to get to you. "Calm down, dude. She will understand," Tae says to Jungkook. So the men club walks to the nearest shopping mall. Tae and Jiho are deep in thought about the perfect gift. Jungkook knows what he wants to buy.
"Where were you, man?" Tae asks after Jungkook came. "I bought the present," he answers. "Dude, I thought we were going to look together. That's unfair," Jiho says while pouting. "I knew what I wanted to buy, so it was easy. Now I can help you guys," he says. Tae waves with the bag in his hand and says, "We already bought something." The three of them went to the food court and ate. Jungkook is sitting with his phone in his hand, waiting for your response.
Kook: What are you doing??
sent
Tae and Jiho shared a knowing look. Both want to say something, but it is easier while they were practicing than now. "Are you feeling something towards yn?" Jiho asks. The question so heavy that also Tae choked on his drink. Jungkook looks up in confusion. "What do you mean?" he asks. "Come on, don't act stupid. You know what I mean. Just answer the question". All of them are quiet for a moment.
"I never felt something like this towards someone," he says after a while. Tae smiles at his words, "We can tell." Jungkook shrugs his shoulders. "I know it's unrealistic. I will leave soon. I don't know how I will turn back to my usual life and pretend like nothing happened here. I can't ask her to come with me, and I can't stay because I don't know if she is feeling the same way. Thinking about it makes me feel like dying slowly". Both men are listening to him with a sad expression. "Every end can be a part of a start. Just because you're leaving doesn't mean it will end. You can go to a college in the same city or nearby. Meet up every other day. It's all about communication, Jungkook. If both of you want a future together, then it will work out. You both just need to make some efforts. You should find the answer to her feelings first," Tae says while tapping on Jungkook's shoulder.
Jungkook nods. "You think we could work?" he asks with teary eyes. "Of course. Love shouldn't be about a perfect plan. It will make it more passionate when you need to fight for it. Time will show you at the end if it's working. And if not, you will at least not regret anything," Tae answers. "Thank you, Tae. That was a big help for me," Jungkook says and wipes off his tears. A small sob is heard. Both of them are confused and turn to Jiho, who was crying. "I'm all whiny when it comes to love struggles," he says, struggling to speak. "I never saw Jiho like this," Tae says and starts laughing. Jungkook joined him and thanked God that he met friends like them.
–
You are sitting with Jia, sipping from your boba. Your mind was on someone else, yes, of course Jungkook. Why would he go without you? Now some scenarios going inside your head. How ridiculous to think about the worst cases; he is seeing someone. Jia senses that you were deep in thought. At the same time, she is checking the birthday group for pictures of the gifts that the boys are sending. Your phone vibrates, and that is a good thing for stopping your weird thoughts and a help to come back to this moment. Jungkook's message makes you smile; he was thinking about you. But who would you be if you answered right away? With a lighter heart, you start talking with your best friend and forget to reply.
–
Kook: Are you alive?!
sent
Kook: Are you ignoring me? TT
sent
He is seconds away from walking to your house and climbing up the window. It is enough for him to fuck up the plan and tell you everything about the present shopping just to clarify that he would love to go to the mall with you, and he would never say no to a boba date. He randomly stands up from his bed and picks up his jacket. If you're not answering, then he will get the answer face to face.
Yn: Why would I ignore you? o.o
Jungkook heard his phone vibrating and threw away the jacket in his hands. Jumping on the bed to lie back and answer quickly.
Kook: Idk... you didn't reply
Yn: Sorry, my battery died:(
Kook: nah it's okay now I know that everything is fine
Yn: yes! Good night 🫶🏼
Kook: good night <3
He needs to see you tomorrow to check if you're sulky at all.
–
You are walking to the classroom with a big smile on your face. This morning you decided to cook for yourself and Jungkook. Okay, you're not the best cook, but it tasted really good. Halfway through the hallway, you stop in your tracks. Is that Jungkook with the pretty girl from the other class? They are talking and laughing. You never saw them talk before, so it's hard to understand from where the closeness came. You watch them a little, and seeing her touching him the whole time makes you sick. The feeling is new in your heart, but you don't want to overthink it. Could it be that your weird scenarios from yesterday were true? Are they more than strangers? Bitter, you feel bitter.
Jungkook talks with Yuna about a school club. Explaining that he was gone next week, so he couldn't extend any of the clubs. He is talking to her for the first time, but he can feel that the girl in front of him wants to know more about him. The conversation is smooth, and he has fun. Until his eyes wander off to the back, and there you are standing. You look a little confused. His eyes meet yours, and that is a signal for you to walk away. Jungkook's face drops quickly, and he cuts the conversation off gently. Wishing her goodbye, he walks to the class.
By the time you are sitting at your desk and looking at something on your phone. The weather is perfect. Jungkook sits in front of you. "Good morning," he says. You didn't look up but answered quickly with a good morning. From the corner of your eyes, you could see him sulking. "Are you mad at me because of yesterday? Come on, I will tell you about it tomorrow!" he says. This is a big hint because tomorrow he wants to count down your birthday. "I'm not mad at you because of yesterday. I just thought we were close enough that you would tell me about the girls you're seeing," you say while putting your phone away. He opens his mouth to say something, but he is stunned. "I'm not seeing anyone. Why would you think that?" he asks. You start looking at him in disbelief. "The girl from earlier wants you. It was so clear," you say. He laughs at that and adds, "I don't care about that; I want someone else." Why is he wiggling with his eyebrows right now?!
"Anyway, I don't care. I cooked lunch for both of us, but now I don't want to share," you say with a pouting face. "Aw, don't lie. You care! And how cute of you to cook for me as well. Can we please share? I want to taste it," he says. You start glaring at him, but his cute face is no help. He starts playing with your fingers. "You know the day I came to your room a little drunk after our first fight?" he asks, not looking up. You nod. "I remember what I said. And I was honest about it". He looks into your eyes. You never answered, but that also never was his intention. He wanted to talk about his feelings, and he will wait until you can talk about yours. His words are enough to make you smile. "I like serious men," you say. "So you like me?" he asks. You look around the room; everyone was inside their own bubble. You come closer to kiss him on the cheek. "Answer your own question," you whisper. It feels like a dream.
At lunchtime you take out two lunch boxes. One in front of Jungkook and one in front of yourself. He opens it with sparkling eyes. "It looks so good, omg," he says. You also cut the vegetables in star shapes. He laughs at that and starts eating. You watch his expression, and seeing him angry was a good sign. Eating happily together is peace for both of you. "Do you have plans for tomorrow night?" he asks after finishing his food. "Hmm, no. Why?" you look at him. "Let's do something together and count down. On Saturday we could celebrate with the rest of the group," he suggests. "Okay, I'm in. What are we going to do? you ask. "It's a surprise," he answers, smiling.
–
It is Friday night, and you are getting ready to meet Jungkook. You decide to wear a black skirt and a cropped brown turtleneck. In front of the door, you wear your leather jacket, scarf, and black Converse. Of course you told your parents that you are going to Jia.
Walking down the street, you see Jungkook waiting. He looks hot with his hair done and an outfit that is matching yours. He sees you coming and waves. Only then did you see the red roses in his hand. That makes your heart skip a beat. "Hi," you say with a shy smile. "Hi, you look beautiful," he says and hands you the roses. "Thank you! They're so pretty, like you," you say while smiling like an idiot. "Come on, let's go. We only have 30 minutes. We will count down at home," he tells you the plan for the night.
After a quick walk, you could see the sea shining. The stars are beautiful, and you feel happy after a long time. "Actually, I wanted to eat the cake here with you, but then I decided to only watch the stars with you instead," he says. "You know that I love the night and the sea," you say. Now you were walking beside the water. It is calming to walk while listening to the water. "I think you were right. That girl from yesterday found me on Instagram and texted me," he suddenly shares. You look at him confused and ask, "What did she say?". "If I want to meet her," he replies. You frown at that. It is selfish to want him only for yourself because, yeah, he is hot, and every girl would want him. "Don't worry; I blocked her right away," he says after the pause. "Why would I worry?" you say, trying to hide the relief. "So you would be okay if I went out on a date with her?" he asks, surprised. "Slow down," you say faster than expected. Jungkook couldn't control his laugh. "Don't worry, baby, I'm all yours," he says, holding up both of his hands. You turn to him with an annoyed expression. "Stop teasing me." "Me? I would never. But you're pretty when you're jealous," he says and continues to laugh.
"You wish for a tragic death," you say while putting the roses behind you. Then you push him into the water. It is so sudden that he loses his balance and falls into the water. You start laughing at him. But you didn't expect him to pull you. It is not deep enough, but your clothes are wet anyway. Both of your laughs ringing in the air. Jungkook places his hands on your waist and starts to dance. Both of you lost in each other's eyes. When was the last time you felt this happy? He starts to sing a love song you never heard before, but you love it. After he finishes, it is a sign for you to move closer. His lips so dangerously close to yours. You start kissing him while your fingers make their way up to his hair on the back. He quickly matches your lip movements. Slipping his tongue inside your mouth. The moment is like an old romantic story. You break the kiss to catch a breath. Both of you are smiling happily. Until you splash water into his face. A second of silence before you grab your roses and start running in panic. He is so fast, "Yah! Don't run away!" he screams behind you. Now you know what to wish for when you blow out the candles.
You are getting inside Jungkook's apartment. He tells you to wait in the living room. You use the time to take off your jacket and put the flowers on the table. Because of your wet clothes, you sit down on the floor. Five minutes later, Jungkook comes back with a birthday cake. Your favorite, strawberry cheesecake. The lights of the candles a beautiful contrast on his skin. He starts singing happy birthday, and you couldn't resist hiding your face with your hands. He sits down in front of you, placing the cake on the table. "Come on, blow it off," he says. You close your eyes for a moment. Thinking of the perfect wish, him. Opening them, you blow out. He claps his hands and starts cutting the cake. You don't know why you want to cry right now. Feeling emotional about the whole situation. Tears pour down your face, and you hate yourself for ruining the moment. Jungkook looks up to give you the slice. "A big slice for the birthday prince—" he stops mid-sentence. You could see the worry in his face. "What happened?" he asks. "I don't want you to leave me," you say with a sob. Saying it out loud made it more painful. He would be gone next week. Jungkook swallows the lump in his throat. "I don't want to leave too," he says, reaching for your hand. You couldn't stop crying, and he comes next to you. Hugging you tight, you lean on his shoulder. "I'm sorry for ruining this now," you told him. "Yah come on. For me it's important what you feel. Never hide it from me, okay?" he says. You nod your head. His gentle fingers are wandering on your back.
Pulling away, you look into his eyes. He brushes your hair away. This time it is him who leans closer to kiss. It feels more intimate than at the beach. He pulls you into his lap while holding your waist. The kiss deepens, and you start to move on his lap a little. Feeling a heat between your legs. His hands sliding inside your cropped turtleneck. You break the kiss and look at him with lust. "Do you want to go on?" he asks with a low voice. Nodding your head, he stands up with you on his arms. He places you on the bed and gets off his shirt. You watch his body while he gets onto the bed and starts kissing your neck. "You're so pretty," he whispers. "Can I take this off?" he asks while his fingers pull at the turtleneck. "Yes," you say a little nervous. You help him get it off. His hands start discovering your body quickly. And the next, your skirt was gone. Lying between his legs, he starts placing kisses around your boobs and stomach. Playing with the hem of your panties, he looks into your eyes for confirmation. You nod quickly and brush his hair with your hand. He takes them off, and they find a place on the floor. "Fuck," he says and starts playing with your sensitive folds. Your moans fill the room. Jungkook is quick to start with his tongue. "You taste amazing, baby," he says. You start fisting his hair. It felt better than imagined. After some time you moan his name, "Oh my god. I think I- I'm coming," you say. "Come pretty girl," he says softly. It is enough for you to shake underneath him. He swallows you happily.
After coming down from your high, you open your eyes. He is watching you like you are the prettiest night sky. The next thing gone is your bra. His fingers and tongue playing with your boobs gently. You had enough courage now to start wandering your fingers on his chest. They quickly find his belt, which you open right away. He helps you take off his pants. Only in his boxers, he watches your body. In his eyes you were the most beautiful he ever saw. His fingers find your folds again. This time pushing in. You moaned at the sudden stretch. He adds one more finger and gently pushes and pulls out of your hole. When he thought it was enough, he pulled out and licked his fingers with a smile. You smile back at him and play with the hem of his boxers. He takes them off, and your eyes wander to his dick. Yeah, he definitely is big. "I need to tell you something," you say. He caresses your face and says, "Tell me, baby." "I never did this before. It's my first time," you whisper a little embarrassed. He smiles at that. "We can stop here if you want." You pout, "No, I want this." "Okay, we will do this together. It will hurt a little, but then you will feel amazing. Trust me?" he says, planting a kiss on your jaw. "I always trust you." "It's also the first time for me," Jungkook says. Now feeling more emotional. You smile at him. "Shit, I have no condom. I can go and buy some," he says, frustrated trying to get off. You stop him. "It's okay for me. I'm on the pill". He nods at that.
"Are you ready?" he asks while starting to stroke his dick. "Yes," you answer. One hand is holding yours, and the other one is guiding his dick to your entrance. He slowly pushes his tip in. "Relax, baby." Pain shoots up through your body as he pushes his length into you inch by inch. You moan his name, and he is kissing your neck while his free hand caresses your hips. With a final thrust, he is all nestled in. He waits for you to adjust to his size. You close your eyes, feeling tears filling. It feels stretched, and it burns a little. But feeling Jungkook's lips on your body makes it all better. "You can move," you say. That is a sign for him, so he starts to slowly pull back and push in. He moans at the sensation. Quickly finding a pace that is okay for both of you. It is more than fucking; it is making love. Your bodies and hearts were one. His room is filled with the sound of bodies and moans. The night is long until you shook underneath him, reaching your high. He soon after spilled his thick ropes of cum into you. Feeling it makes you moan into his lips. After controlling his breath, he slowly pulls out and watches his cum spilling out.
Jungkook helps you clean up, and you took a shower together. You are in his arms like a koala when you turn back to his room. Wearing one of his shirts. He sits you down on his desk with a kiss on top of your hair. Then he turns to the bed and starts changing his sheets. You see the little bloodstain on it. After unfolding the fresh sheets, you lay down. He hugs you tight. "I love you." You kiss his cheek as an answer to his words. Sleep was pulling you, and Jungkook was happy to watch you.
–
Jungkook is the first one to wake up. He enjoys the view and starts playing with your hair. His head full of questions, are you going to regret everything? Your eyes flutter open and meet his. You smile at him and move closer to warm up. He smiles at that and hugs you even more. "Good morning, baby," he says. You place a kiss on his neck. "Good morning. Do you want to know what I dreamed about?" you ask. He nods his head. "About the cake. I forgot to taste it," you say, pulling away. You jut out your lip while watching his movements. "You can eat all of it if you want. Come on," he says and stands up. Holding his hand, you walk to the living room. You sit down on the floor and start to eat. "Whoa, so tasty." Jungkook carefully watches you with a smile.
He suddenly stands up and walks back to the bedroom. Soon coming back with a box in his hand. "I forgot to give you your present," he says. Sliding the little box on the table towards you as a signal to open it. You look at him confused. Opening the box, you see matching silver rings with little diamonds around them. You start laughing, "Are you going to propose?". He rolls his eyes. "Marrying you is on my list, but it's too soon," he adds. "So romantic," you say while getting shy. You take out one of the rings and try it on your middle finger. With joy you show him it. "Now showing me a middle finger? Tsk," he says. You take out the other one, which is a little bit bigger than yours. "Which finger?" you ask. "Index," he answers. You slide it on his finger. He touches your hand. "It looks so cute." You take out your phone and take a picture of your hands. "I love it," you say with a big smile. "Thank you, Jungkook," you add after a little pause. "But I want you to wear it forever until I buy you a new one," he says. You nod at him, "Of course. But you too!". "I promise," he says.
After eating more cake, you started getting ready for the celebration with your friends. All of you rented a party room with karaoke and music. Dancing to party hits and singing your lungs out. Of course, alcohol wasn't missing. Tae forced you to play a drinking game. Both of you are already tipsy. Jungkook watched you the whole day, drinking fewer. When you called it a day, everyone started getting home.
You knew that your family wasn't home, so Jungkook helps you to get into your room. "I need to do my routine," you say and walk to the bathroom. He helps you get your makeup off and brush your teeth. Sitting on the bed, you wait for him to give you your pajamas. He helps you change and tucks you into bed. Patiently waiting for you to fall asleep. "Happy birthday," he whispers before leaving.
–
1 week later...
If you could stop the time, you would do it right now. It was one day before Jungkook returns home, and you felt more than sad. You talked a lot about this topic, but none of you had the courage to ask to stay or come. But you decided to stay in contact and go to a college that is near to meet. Why is it feeling like it will never happen and everything will end in this city?
When you arrive at the restaurant for the last dinner, you fight not to cry. It's your fault to have such a relationship with him while you knew he would be gone soon. You try to not think about it tonight. Walking inside, you can already see everyone sitting at the table. "I'm so sorry for being late," you say. "Nah, all good. I also came seconds before," Tae says. You sit down next to Jungkook (it was the only free chair). He smiles at you and you return it. Everyone starts to order food and drinks. After some time the table is full and you start eating.
"I can't believe that the time flew by so fast," Jiho says in disbelief. "Time is so crazy," Jia adds. You silently eat your pasta. Jungkook is worried about you. He can imagine what is happening inside your head. But he knows you will try to play it off tonight. Finishing your food, you start to sip from your wine. Tae gives Jungkook a little side eye, and you catch that. Perfect, your plan wasn't going anywhere. Everyone knows about my feelings, you think. It feels uncomfortable that every one of them looked at you from time to time. Oh, they want you to cry. The waiter quickly took the empty plates. You start eating the fruits and think of their story. The silence is killing you.
Tae waves a bag in front of Jungkook's face while he is busy looking at you. He turns to the bag in surprise. "That is a little gift from us all. I know we will see each other again, but I want you to remember us in this memory," Tae says. "Thank you so much. I really appreciate it," Jungkook says. He pulls out a box and opens it to see the black watch. "It's so pretty," he says and starts wearing it right away. Why is it so warm in here? You can feel your eyes getting watery. And at this second you start scolding yourself. It was the last dinner together, and you don't want him to remember it like a funeral.
"I remember the first day when we were waiting for the exchange students. You were standing next to the teacher like a proud little kid," you suddenly say and start to laugh. "Oh my god, yes! They acted like it's a big mystery," Jia adds, also laughing at the memory. Jungkook is happy to see you laughing. "I was nervous, okay? New city and new people. It's not that easy," he says to defend himself. "Ah, come on. There were already rumors that you are hot," Tae says. "Everybody wanted to see you," Jiho says with a grin. You could see his ears getting red. "Are you shy?" you ask him with a smile. "It's a little embarrassing," he answers with a pout. You laugh at that and poke his cheek. "Come on, I would feel like an idol if I were you," you say. He sticks his tongue out. The night goes on like that. Everyone telling a funny story and you feel the bonding.
Getting out of the restaurant, you start walking to the nearest station. Because of the sea, it was a lot windier, but it felt good. "Let's leave a memory of us behind," Jia says and kneels down. All of you walk towards her. She takes out a black pen that is thick enough to write on the ground. It was a little place on the floor full of names. She started writing the names. You smile at the heart she drew next to them. "We need to meet here in ten years," she says. You think about it; in ten years, where are you? What happened in your life? Are you in touch with Jungkook?
Like always, you bid goodbye to your friends. Now only you and Jungkook are walking together. "I will miss you," he says suddenly. It cuts through the silence and your heart. "I will miss you too," you say. "I never expected you to return my words, but do you have feelings for me?" he asks with soft eyes. You turn to him. "Do you think I would be like that without having feelings for you?". He nods, but you know that this is not what he is asking for. "I know that you want to hear the magic three words," you say and pause for a moment. "I will not say it to you," you add. He looks confused and asks, "Why?". "I'm scared that it will be the end of us. So I'm giving you something to wait for us," you say. His head now hanging low. When he decides to look up, you see tears streaming down his face. It is the last straw for your own tears. "This will never be the end of us, right?" he asks with a sparkle of hope. You shrug your shoulders and step closer to him. Hugging him tightly, you kiss his neck. His hands find their place on your waist. The time should stop now.
–
In the morning, all of you stand in front of Jungkook's house. It was time to go for him. He started saying goodbye to everyone. Standing in front of you, he hands you an envelope. "This is for you," he adds. You take it and smile at him. "If this is the end, will you come to my first gallery event?" you ask him. He smiles at that and answers, "I will. And will you come to my first match?". "I will," you say while wiping off your tear. He kisses you on the lips a little longer than planned. Turning around, he waves goodbye to all of you. "I will miss you," Tae says with teary eyes. "I will miss you too. Thank you for everything," Jungkook says before getting into the taxi. You watch the car drive away. Without saying anything, you walk back home. You realize that you never walked back alone from his house. This was reason enough to start crying.
Walking into your room, you lock the door. You sit down on the floor and look at the window. Can he crawl in? You look at the envelope. Why does it feel so suffocating? Opening it, you start reading the letter he left:
Dear Yn,
It's my second time writing a letter. And I needed a lot of tries to finish this one. My first letter was a confession about my feelings towards you, but I managed to say I love you. I wished I could tell you all of this, but I know that I will break down. If you're reading this, it means I'm on my way home. First of all, I want to thank you for everything. For every moment that you shared with me. I wish I could stay a little longer or promise you that this is a beginning. Maybe we will never see each other again, but never forget that these moments will always remain special to me. I will hold my promises, so please do it too. Live for your dreams and never give up, okay? If this is our end, I wish you a lovely future. A true love, someone who would stay with you no matter what. I hope you're not mad at me for leaving. I just know that it's unrealistic to say, Fuck everything; I will stay, or I will take you with me. Why are we so young? Anyway, I will always be there for you no matter what. Please call me if you need to. Never forget that I love you. I will wait for the day that you will say it back.
Your (I will always be yours)
Jungkook
Note: Please listen to the CD. I wrote the song and sang it for you.
You can't control your tears. It hurts so much that you want to cry until there are no more tears left. "I love you so much," you whisper. He was the only one who wanted your happiness. Not your family; it was him who supported your dreams. Of course your friends were also there for you. But he was special. Your first with a lot. With shaking hands, you take out the CD and put it in your CD player. Jungkook's soft voice starts playing. The song familiar to your ears. He sang it at the beach on your birthday. You cried yourself to sleep. Hoping he would be in your dreams.
–
˚₊✩‧₊2024˚₊✩‧₊
You are standing with a little group of people talking about your last works. It was your first gallery event, and you feel excited about it. More and more people come to look at your work. At the end you're happy about every single piece. You could see Tae, Jia, and Jiho standing at the table. Excusing yourself, you walk towards them. "Hiii! Thanks for coming," you say. "Everything looks so good," Tae says. You smile at him, "Thank you." "At the end it was worth it," Jia says with a smile. "Yeah, you're right," you answer. After talking a bit, you walk away to look at your own pieces and answer some questions. You stand longer at one piece, which is your favorite. You gave it the title 'end of time.' A beach at night, with two people dancing and a bucket of roses on the sand. It reminds you of your 19th birthday.
"This looks familiar," a voice says. You turn to him in disbelief. "You came," you say with a low voice. Jungkook smiles at you. "I promised." You return the smile and play with your ring that he gifted you ten years ago.
–
┊͙Epilogue - 2014┊͙
Jungkook is sitting on the train wiping his tears. He decides to listen to some music for distraction. Opening his travel bag, he finds a small bag. He doesn't remember putting this in his travel bag. He takes out the frame and starts smiling. It is a drawing of him with his favorite jersey on. Your signature on the right side. His tears start to flow again. He grabs the piece of paper and starts reading:
I hope you like it! Sorry for sneaking this in, but I wanted to surprise you. I know you're sad about the whole situation, but stop being so. I know that this will not be the end. How ridiculous it would be for two people who love each other to break contact just because they're not living next door! Right? I love you, but despite it, wait to hear it from me, okay? Now stop sulking and enjoy your ride back. <3
Today he is smiling for the first time thanks to you. You make him feel sad and happy at once. He is happy that he had the chance to get to know you and love you. And also being loved by you. He played all of his luck on this, and he regrets not a bit.
━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━
Thank you for reading! This is my first work, so I hope you enjoyed it. Also, English is not my first language, so excuse me for mistakes.
I love and hate open endings. Do you think they met at the gallery for the first time after ten years? Maybe I will write a part 2 about all the things that were left open. Depends on how many people are interested in reading this.
I would be happy if you could leave a review. Feel free to ask me questions or talk about anything (press the button in my bio)! Feel loved ♡
#kookochan#jungkook#jeon jungkook#jungkook drabble#jungkook imagine#jungkook scenarios#jungkook oneshot#jungkook au#jungkook x reader#jungkook x you#jungkook fluff#jungkook angst#jungkook smut#jungkook fic#jungkook fanfic#bts#bts x reader#bts au
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Frankly i always read it as Danny choosing to take the shots for the JL’s victims as he wishes someone would do for him, and to take the blow back once he realized there would be little to no negative affect on him.
This is more from the Superman-hates-Kon or JL-is-team-Clones-are-to-be-killed as he has experience with that and doesn’t necessarily see the individual clones in their own fawn and freeze or flight and fight modes.
He sees his clone, Dani, and imagines her in that position.
Danny is more than willing to fight for others (see the show) and while he’s willing to let Mikey get bullied in his place he still winces at it and has tried to redirect Dash a few times to himself when he gets more comfortable and confident in his ghostly abilities and how low the impact will be for him long term on healing and such as a halfa and hero compared to very human Mikey.
So i always figured Danny was doing a mixed projection of his own neglect from his parents, which he absolutely sees Superman doing if he refuses to interact with Kon in any story where Kon is kryptonian (and you know, needs a fellow kryptonian to help with his powers and none were available (only superman and Kon exist) or are actively against Kon’s existence (versions where Kara is against clones existing). Danny can clock that as Severe Neglect and goes ‘wait a minute there’s no one else with his power set to help! You say you’re a hero (good, kind, benevolent) but are lying (as neglect to child/clone in need of guidance that this situation boxes you in as only option) what the fuck is wrong with you!’ As his initial reaction.
Becuase in these Kon is in a mixed parallel to Dani (clone, made to hurt creator but Danny is unaware of that) and Danny (a mildly neglected child taught to not fight back) after Danny has grown confident in his abilities to defend both Ghosts and Humans from one another and likely is working up the courage to do so with his parents or has done so already.
Danny is seeing Kon as someone Dani could have been is obvious, but Danny seeing himself in there, the neglect and (seemingly) having one option to mentor in your abilities but is not allowed to be (For Danny as Vlad demanded Jack’s death, for Kon as Superman won’t interact with him period) means Danny is doing what he wished someone did for him when he was younger and acting as that person.
Is he petty about it? Yep.
Is he also deciding to be the rudest version of a wakeup call possible in the Kon case where he’s projecting Dani and himself on Kon? Yep!
Would Danny forgive them later? Forgiveness is Kon’s to give and Danny will follow his lead, but will hold the grudge to guilt superman during backslides.
For Flash i always assumed its a longstanding grudge from cleaning up the mess to keep timelines functional and a longstanding thing on Danny’s side (possibly meeting flash out of order/non linearly) and his beef is with how many times he fixed the various flashes (as yeah. They pass the title around and have multiple flashes besides Barry and Wally. Bart’s been flash as have Jay Garrick and a lot of others. This is a borderline bloodfued with the Phantoms who keep going off to fix Flash Fuckups and see what the timelines could have been had the Flash not played musical chairs with the timelines.
The flash fam just has not learned that yet (besides maybe Bart who’s either aware and figured the rest were too, or was given an exception as Clockwork’s favorite for not playing with timelines like putty constantly).
GL idk about havent seen alot of that, atleast with his character. General ‘dont ask how i died’ things sure but usually related to summoning danny after trying ti bind him… and at that point JL usually have screwed up something else apart from summon.
Interdimensional warcrimes i tend to only see with Ghost King summonings and them demanding he do xyz or banish him from their dimension and the like. Or a deal to handle a big bad with that as Danny’s price, so it may be a matter of what our feeds are getting there.
And yeah, set up is a skill in writing that takes ages to learn (as someone who is iffy on that skill, can confirm its a bastard to learn if you’re not a writer who is good at corralling the characters and plot.)
So i assumed these were usually just drabbles and snippits and the rest was for imagination to work out esp if its mostly dialouge in character action: dialouge format 🤷♀️
Why is Danny everyone’s mouthpiece for their random grudges against various superheroes? Why is it SO COMMON for Danny to show up and immediately start chewing people out?
Like. Danny? Mr. ‘My Parents Shoot At Me But It’s Fine’? Mr. ‘Dates The One Ghost Hunter At His School’? Danny ‘Dash Can Shove Me Around I Guess’ Fenton? Holds a bunch of grudges against popular superheroes and tries to punch them at the first available opportunity??
I know it’s become a pretty popular characterization in fandom for Danny to be pretty testy/spiteful, I just don’t really get it
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Who am I to you?
Part 3
King of Curses Ryomen Sukuna x afab reader x twin brother and Kingsguard Yuuji Itadori
Yuuji is eager to be a father. And when it seems to him that he might not be well equipped to fulfill his goal, he seeks help from the only person he knows will do it without a second thought. But someone should have warned him that this (re)union might breed more than a child, something he'd regret for a long time.
Here's Part 1 and Part 2.
Minors, DNI. WC: 4.9k
CW: smoking, infertility, anger, frustration, feeling humiliated, poisoning, paralysis, heavy drinking, mutual bickering, lots of angst, true form Sukuna, PIV sex, oral [fem receiving(from tummy tongue)], breast play, praises, breeding, talk about pregnancy and motherhood
"He wants to see you.”
You have your head in your hands. As if the past two weeks have not been stressful enough, Yuuji has come to you with a request you can't make heads or tails of. You're not even sure you heard him right. Please have a child with Aniki, that's what you believe he said. But that's insane. Does he have no idea what he's asking for?
"What for? Has he agreed to your proposal?" You're shaking. When you said you wanted to see Ryomen, this is not how you thought it would go.
"He wants to know what you want.”
You scoff. "Do you want to know what I want?”
"You want to be a mother, right? Love, we talked about this before we even started trying. If you had disagreed, I'd have never tried to change your mind. And... and..." Yuuji sits down at the edge of the bed. "By the looks of it, I can't give you a child. So the next best... closest option I can give you is my twin brother. It will be just like having a baby with me, you know.”
"Yuuji, the problem could be with me," You try to reason with your husband.
"Do you really believe that? We studied this for so long, went to doctors and asked for their opinion. We know your cycle is healthy. The bleeding always happens on time. Whereas…”
"There is absolutely no indication that there is something wrong with you either. You do so much physical labor, you stay active, and you have no addictions. Hell, you haven't even touched a bottle of sake since we started trying. If anything, the fact that Ryo has been smoking and drinking since he was fifteen should deter you from making the request that you are."
Yuuji sighs. It's time for him to sit with his head in his hands. Just when you start to think you've gotten through to him, he asks, "please can we try this once?”
So you walk across the courtyard, following your husband's shadow, wavering in the light of the lantern he is holding. It's late, late in the night. The palace is silent, so silent you can hear the snores from the servants' rooms, the clacking of shoes as the guards keep watch, the low hum of a chant from Uraume's room and, of course, your own thumping heartbeat. You were so glad to be finally reuniting with Ryo but so torn to be committing the sin you have been scared of ever since you married Yuuji. What was Ryomen thinking? He should have turned Yuuji down in the first place.
"Aniki," Yuuji calls out from the doorstep. "We're here.”
The room reeks of opium, the smell of yearning and being left behind. The four-armed beast that terrorizes the land is sitting at the window, blowing ringlets of smoke into the air outside. His kimono loosely hangs from his shoulders, baring his chest. You don't know how to look at him without giving away all your truth. So you don't look at him; you look around him.
"Come in," he demands.
Yuuji leads you in by the hand, sitting you down on a couch on the floor. The room has changed so much since you saw it the last time you were allowed to come inside to deliver the King's supper. There is a full-size four post bed taking up a lion's share of the room, it's canopy red and black, a tapestry of danger. You sit in silence, observing the two most important men in your life have a conversation about who gets to breed you. This is the most humiliated you've felt in all your life but you want to see how far they're willing to push your boundaries before they realize they're both losing you.
"My love?" Yuuji beckons you back out of your spiraling thoughts. "Aniki wanted to know if you're okay with all this.”
"Tell him I don't care.”
"That settles it, Yuuji. I don't wish to proceed if she's not willing. It'd be—”
"What I mean is..." You grit your teeth. "I don't care as long as it is something Yuuji wants.”
Your husband rushes to you, kneels and looks up at you with teary eyes. "Thank you, my love. Thank you so much. You make my world a better place to live in. I've never and I can never love anyone as much as I love you. Well, maybe the baby. But both of you will be sharing the same spot on my heart." He kisses your hand and you caress the side of his face when he looks at you like you've just picked the moon from the sky to give it to him. He's so precious, you want to do just that.
You feel a somber gaze on you but Ryo is facing elsewhere when you look up. Only the two eyes on his mask are on you and they give away nothing. Not even a speck of emotion. He's back to being the old him, the Ryo you could never figure out.
Yuuji wipes at his runny nose before standing up. "You two have a lot to catch up on. Why don't I leave you to it? We don't want it to be uncomfortable when you know... you two... yeah, I'm going to... okay! See you later, my love.”
You sit in silence, staring at the door that Yuuji shuts behind him. The night is chilly and the open window beside Ryo is not helping in the slightest. What do you have to talk to him about? What can you even say? I've been imagining your face at the heights of my pleasure for the last five years? Too forward. I'm still gonna call you the name I have our entire lives and not refer to you as the Lord or the King? A little offensive.
He clears his throat and sits up. His kimono falls further apart, drawing your eyes to his abdomen. You only wanted to steal a glance but the sight of his gaping belly shakes you to your very core. He starts to say, "I was thinking—”
But you stop him, "Are you hurt?" Your eyes are fixated on his abdomen and you can swear you see something moving.
"Where?" He follows your gaze. "This? It's only a second mouth.”
You look up at his face in horror, finally meeting his eyes. "A second mouth? What happened— you know what, never mind. Just let me know when—”
"No, go ahead." His voice is suddenly so much softer. "Ask me anything.”
You scoff. "You're much agreeable when you know you're about to fuck me, aren't you?”
His eyes grow darker at your challenge. His jaw tightens. "I shall not tolerate being talked to like that anymore. We're no longer just friends. I am your King and you will remember that.”
"Right. Understood... Sukuna-sama." The sound of your heart breaking is so loud, you barely hear his next words anymore.
"Do you agree? Woman?”
"I'm sorry, could you please repeat yourself... my Lord?" Your eyes are downcast now. The water on your lids make them heavy.
Ryomen sighs. "I suggested we lie to Yuuji. And hopefully he'll give this up in a few months when you don't become with child. Do you agree with that?”
"No, I don't. I too want a child, my Lord, and if you care about your brother, you'll give me one.”
𓆸𓆸𓆸𓆸𓆸𓆸𓆸𓆸𓆸𓆸𓆸𓆸𓆸𓆸𓆸𓆸𓆸𓆸
The next time you see Ryo in his chambers, you go alone. In the middle of the night. The palace is busy for the upcoming coronation of their terrifying protector, readying the halls for guests from neighboring kingdoms. Sneaking is not an option so you carry a tea set up the stairs as an excuse to visit the King.
The fusuma slides open just as you're about to knock, revealing a towering Ryomen on the other side. As if, he has been expecting you. You quickly steer your glance and bow to him. "I'm here with your tea, my Lord."
"Come in." He steps out of your way.
The state of the room surprises you. It does not smell of weed or tobacco anymore; in fact, it smells pleasant. Somehow, it looks bigger, cleaner. You set the tray down on the tatami, kneel in front of it, and Ryomen takes up the spot opposite to you. "Why is there only one cup?" He asks, folding two of his arms over his chest while the other two rest on his thighs.
"Oh, I'm sorry, my Lord. Do you require two separate cups?”
"No, woman, where is your cup?”
You chuckle. "I dare not drink tea with my King now. That'd be blasphemous." You keep the smug smile on your face while you swirl the kyūsu and strain the tea into the cup you brought for Ryomen. He picks it up and takes a sip before placing it back on the tray.
"Drink," he orders. You shake your head, feeling a sudden rush of courage. "I said, drink. You dare to defy your King, do you?”
His words make you stop. There's no ill intent in his words, no authority in his tone, just a friendly challenge. So you bring his cup to your lips to take down a big chug. "You're having fun with this, aren't you?" You ask.
"As much as you are." There's a smirk on his lips, like there used to be on your friend, Ryomen's lips.
Nothing happens that night. The tray sits between as you two chat about things like old friends do, the air filled with your chuckles as he teases you for being a missus now, for not treating him after the wedding, for not realizing how quick the passing of time and his absence could change everything.
"Have you been to see her?" You ask, pouring again from the teapot.
Ryo knows what you're talking about. "I have. The crime scene had one name written all over it. Yours. What did you do?" He sounds proud.
"Just this berry and that leaf and that other fruit. I only wanted to make sure she can never use her hand to hit someone close to me ever again.”
Ryo smirks, sipping on his tea before handing the cup to you. "And what about my father?”
"I had nothing to do with Otou-san's death. If anything, I believe it was your half-brother's greed." You sigh. "You see what I've married into?”
He scoffs. "Now now, you keep my little brother out of this. His lamb-like innocence makes up for the dysfunctionality of the rest of my family. I'm sorry. I mean, our family.”
𓆸𓆸𓆸𓆸𓆸𓆸𓆸𓆸𓆸𓆸𓆸𓆸𓆸𓆸𓆸𓆸𓆸𓆸
The morning of the coronation, you wake up to the sound of someone knocking on your door. Your husband climbs off the bed before you can. "I'll see who it is, my love. You stay put." You shuffle out of the sheets anyway, your robes intact.
There's a woman's voice outside. "Sukuna-sama has sent your attires for today. I will be helping the lady with her jūnihitoe."
"Jūnihitoe?" Yuuji and you ask at the same time.
"Yes. That is what Sukuna-sama wanted. Is there a problem?"
You shrug at your husband who replies, "umm... no, there's no problem. Please give us some time to freshen up." There's a hum at the door and Yuuji shuts it behind him. He walks up to you as you keep shaking your head. "You know, subtlety is not his strong suit. It'll be fine. Don't worry."
"I'll look like a fish out of water, wearing that in the middle of the servants' rows."
You don't have to sit in the middle of the servants' rows. When Ryo sees you and Yuuji walk out into the yard in your shiny new clothes, he sends Uraume to fetch the two of you close to his makeshift throne. "What are the plans for today?" You ask Uraume as you get as comfortable as possible on the wooden seats.
They huff. "We have the coronation where your mother-in-law will crown Sukuna-sama, who will then appoint the ministers and officially declare Itadori-kun as the Commander of the Kingsguard. Then there's the tourney where the champions from neighboring states have come to compete for a spot on the King of Curses' army. And then there's the feast that will last the rest of the day. You would have known all of that if you didn't lock yourself in your room twenty-four hours a day."
Nothing pleases you more than when they bring in your mother-in-law in a wheelchair, the right side of her body limp from having her tea dosed with high amounts of toxins every day for a year. She can barely speak more than a few syllables without her tongue getting heavy. Your pride bellows in your chest when Ryomen walks down the steps of the dais to get to the center of the yard.
The audience is silent as the beast refuses to bend his knee. The servants help up your mother-in-law, lifting her up on a step as she struggles to hold the crown up in her left hand.
Ryo whispers something you don't hear from afar but you smile when his stepmother is forced to use both her hands to put the crown on his head.
"Aniki is too much at times," Yuuji complains.
"But isn't this so satisfying to watch?"
"That, it is."
The smirk on your face lingers as the proceedings continue. Ryo walks around the yard, naming his ministers even though he just told you the other night that he doesn't need any. He summons Yuji and declares him to be the Commander of the Kingsguard. The crowd doesn't cheer when one brother kneels in front of the other. The crowd doesn't make a peep the whole day; they're there because they don't want to lose their heads or that of their children.
You admire how Ryomen has the whole town under his thumb. The town that wronged you, shunned you and your mother, he's punishing them. You don't know where it is coming from, but there is a sense of accomplishment that you cannot shake off.
He drinks the rest of the day, through the tourney, the declaration of the winner and the evening feast. Every time you see Yuji trying to snatch away his jug from him, Ryo becomes grumpy, demanding his mead be handed back.
To be honest, he doesn't even look drunk. You've seen him inebriated before, in your teenage years. He used to become clumsy and throw things, and curse a lot. But now, he's just... a little grumpy. Maybe his changed physical form has something to do with that.
You're quickly proved wrong. You're talking to some of your colleagues, sitting at the dinner table Uraume assigned to you, when a partially filled jug of ale flies across the room, drenching half the guests. The dinner hall buzzes with commotion, chairs shifting, people questioning, and when you look up toward the direction of the throne, your eyes lock with the King's. He is grumpy because of you.
Only a moment later, Yuuji comes to fetch you. "Aniki is asking for you." His new clothes are flashy, his cloak red like the blood of those he would slay for his brother. He takes your arm in his as he leads you to the throne.
"You wanted to see me, Your Highness?" You bow to the King.
"Yes..h, woman." His words slur. "I am retiring from the party and I wish to dine in my quarters. You will make such arrangements while my brother and I be on our way there."
"Of course, Your Highness."
When you reach the doors of his bedroom, a heavy tray in your hand, you stop to listen in on the conversation between the brothers. "This body was supposed to be a deformity, a curse levied on me for my sins. But I see this as a saturation of strength. What's better than two arms?"
"Four," Yuuji answers. "I agree with you. But I don't understand the mouth on your stomach."
"Actually, this was a gift. It can be used for chanting."
Yuuji hums. "One thing hasn't changed in you. Do you know what that is, Aniki?"
"What?"
"Your massive ego and penchant for showing off." The brothers laugh. "Saturation of strength? Who talks like that?"
You smile as you keep listening. It fills your heart with warmth knowing that the twins have rebuilt their relationship. Still, you can't shake off the feeling of being left behind yet again.
"You're not smoking anymore?"
"No," Ryomen replies. "You assigned me a task, remember? Tobacco and opium might delay or worse, hinder it. Hence—"
Your cheeks start to warm up.
"Alcohol might too," your husband argues. "And yet—"
"Your dinner is here, Your Highness." You put a stop to that conversation as quickly as you can.
Yuuji slides open the door, welcoming you inside. You place the tray on the table in the middle of the room before bowing to the King. Your husband chuckles. "Love, there's nobody around. We don't need to do that here."
He takes your hand and pulls you toward the couch where Ryo is leisurely taking up half the space. Yuuji puts you in his lap, draws you close to his chest as the brothers keep chatting. Your eyes never leave Ryo's. Well, you are not even sure which eyes to follow — the drunk, embarrassed human eyes that fleet between your face and Yuuji's, or the demon eyes frowning at the spot on your arm that Yuuji squeezes every time he adjusts you in his embrace.
The food you brought stays on the table, forgotten and going cold, as the three of you reminisce about your childhood. Yuuji teases you, bringing up how you used to be scared of Ryo when you first arrived at the mansion and still followed him around, touching his arm every now and then, trying to figure him out.
"Shall we get going now?" Yuuji nudges your shoulder with his chin and the demon eyes furrow even further. You nod.
Your husband starts to lead you away when you feel a grip on you, pulling you back. Yuuji turns too when you fall behind. He spots Ryomen's downcast gaze on the spot where the tips of his thumb and first finger meet around your wrist. The shock on Yuuji's face catches your eye but before you can wriggle yourself out of his brother's grasp, he walks back to you and pecks the side of your face. "I'll see you in the morning, my love." And just like that, he is gone.
"You can't be serious." You rebuke Ryomen, yanking your hand away.
"You wanted this." His gaze is still downcast.
You scoff. "Oh, poor Ryomen! It must be so miserable having to fuck a woman. You must have never done that in your whole life."
His eyes flash with frustration. "They were whores."
"And what am I? Asking my husband's brother to fuck me so I can experience motherhood. Am I any different?"
Ryo stands up from the couch and walks toward you, making you take a step back. He's huge now. So much taller and bigger than he was before. You're up against the wall, sandwiched between the wood and his chest. "Ryo, please." You breathe, looking away.
"Do I still scare you, woman?"
You shake your head, refusing to give him the last laugh.
"Even when I look like this?"
Your eyes fly open, meeting his. All four of his eyes are on you, expectant and vulnerable. He needs you. You reach out to touch his face, the human side, and he leans into it like a cat. "Ryo," You call out to him. All your anger melts when he closes all his eyes and relishes in your touch. You place your other hand on his chest, trying to feel the beat of his heart. It's calm, a steady pace. He's at peace in your arms.
"What am I to you?" Ryo asks. For a brief moment, he looks like a boy again, wanting to know if you love him.
"I don't know."
Ryomen smiles wryly before escaping your embrace. He's about to say something but you beat him to it.
"There has not been a single moment in the last five years when you weren't on my mind. I'm cooking and I make it spicier because you prefer it that way. I am sewing and I use your favorite colors. I'm sitting by the pond by myself and I imagine us having a conversation. My husband..." You choke up. "My husband is making love to me and I... I see your face. You... you left me. I played our last conversation over and over in my head, trying to untangle the web of your riddles but I couldn't." You rub off the tears streaming down your face. "You left me here and Yuuji was like my wooden plank in open ocean. I had to... even though it was so wrong... even though —"
Ryo cups your face in two of his hands, pausing your downpour of thoughts. "If I stall any longer, I'll never do it."
Before you can say anything else, his lips find yours. His two lower arms pull you into his body as he kisses you. You knew there will be no tenderness with Ryomen but this passion is abundant and unbound. His big, strong hands squeeze your sides as they run up and down your torso with frenzied lust. You throw your arms around his neck, keeping him close.
He lifts you up in his arms as he keeps kissing you, his mouth hot and demanding, and carries you over to the bed. "Get these off, woman." He pulls at the ties of your top robe. "Jūnihitoe was a bad idea"
You chuckle at his child-like impatience. But can you really blame him? You're itching too to touch him, to have him touch you, claim you. Oh it's so wrong! It's so unfair to Yuuji.
But Yuuji is the last thing on your mind right now.
Robe by robe, layer by layer, you come undone to the lover you thought you were never meant to have. Here he is, undressing you, kissing your lips, your cheeks, your neck, and all you can do is... let him.
You can swear you see his jaws drop open once you're completely naked. "Don't stare," You tease, your cheeks burning. "It's not the first time you're seeing a woman."
"They were whores. You are..." Ryo hesitates. "You are you."
"Wow, you're so efficient at communicating what I mean to you." You smirk.
"Stop being bratty, woman." His human eyes are trying their hardest to intimidate you while the demon eyes are too busy ogling your chest to care.
You lie down and Ryo follows beside you. He cradles your head, his fingers nestling in your hair as he kisses you again. Your deft fingers find their way to the sash of his robe, pulling it apart, immediately navigating their way over his skin, around the inhuman mouth.
"Goodness," You yelp when you feel something wet glide past your hand.
"Oh, it has a mind of its own. I can't really control it." Ryo makes an excuse. "But, it seems as though it likes you."
"That was surely a demonstration of affection."
You both laugh, easing up the tension and unfortunately, the built up desire. Ryomen lies down on his back with you on one of his arms. His robe falls apart, exposing his chest. You extend a hand to touch him. Drawing circles through his scanty hair, you pull yourself closer to him.
Before he can say anything, you put your hand over his mouth, still damp from your kiss. "Can you, for once, put yourself before your brother? For me?"
You sit up, flinging one leg over his hips. Ryo runs his fingers over your thighs as you settle yourself. You take two of his hands and guide them to your chest. "You've grown, woman," he groans.
"What does that mean?"
He sits up, pulling you closer so your forehead touches his. "It means, I've craved your breathy moans, the harshness of your nails on my back, the sweet taste of your sweat on my tongue. I used to watch you walk back to the house after your bath, your chest heaving with every step." He kneads your flesh, making you gasp as he softly tugs at a nipple. "In winters, like an old creep, I used to lecherously stare at the pert points on the front of your robe, imagining my hands over them... and my mouth." He snuggles his nose against your jaw and kisses it before venturing southward. Locking his human eyes with you, he opens his mouth wide and closes his lips around your bud.
His tongue sends jolts of sensation down your spine. You grasp at his hair, pushing your teat further into his mouth. Two of his hands grope the soft flesh of your behind, squeeze the fat on your hips, glide over your thighs, before one of his fingers finds the core of your pleasure.
"So wet, woman," he mumbles against your nipple. "Almost like you've been waiting all your life for me."
"I have." Your eyes water as he draws circles around your clitoris, slow, drawn out, painfully patient circles. "You're such a tease, Ryo. Why don't you just... take me?"
"And what's the fun in that? Let me utilize every moment I have with you." He kisses you again. "What if this is all we have?"
The heart that was warm and gleeful, breaks again. You look into Ryomen's eyes, only to find a mirror that reflects your feelings. This time, you kiss him. Fervently. Maniacally. You push his back to the the bed again, slowly sliding down his torso to meet his lips. What you don't expect is a tongue on your clit, the tongue on Ryo's stomach.
You sit up, perplexed at the onslaught of pleasure but unable to lift yourself off of the demonic mouth. Ryo encourages you. "You look so good like that, woman. That's right, grind your hips against my mouth. Your pleasure gives me pleasure. Are you coming?"
You nod, unable to form words anymore.
"Keep going, woman. You're doing so good. Come for me. Come for me."
This orgasm leaves a permanent mark on your psyche and also on Ryo's abdomen. Your nails have gone as far into his skin as they could, drawing blood.
Without a moment of respite, Ryo flips you over on the bed. Your giggling stops when his strong arm pulls your waist up to put a cushion under it. "You wanted me to take you, didn't you?" He rasps, bending over you, so close that his belly mouth springs out and starts licking your back. "Talk to me. Tell me what you want."
"I want you inside me." You finally voice your lewd thoughts. "I want you to give me a child, Ryo. Even if I have to raise it with Yuuji, I want you and myself to know who the father really is."
"Fuck," Ryomen groans.
You cry out as he pushes in, your delicate skin threatening to break around his girth. As soon as you accommodate yourself to his length, he starts rocking his hips. His grip is strong on the plump flesh of your hips as his nails dig in to keep you in place. You can feel him, throbbing, his fat tip pulsating against your womb, ready to breed you on command.
"You feel so good, woman." He's moaning too. Your name on his lips sounds like exactly how it was supposed to be pronounced when your mother named you. His hands are traveling up and down your back, grabbing, squeezing, groping your flesh. "If you so badly want a child... I'll give you one. More. As. Many. As. You. Want." He thrusts with every word until his grip on you tightens to the point of bruises.
You've lost count of how many orgasms you've had but when Ryo comes, you feel fulfilled. You're so filled with his warmth, you don't realize when you collapse on the bed, when Ryo's hand scoops you close to his chest. "You did good, woman. I'm sure this union will be fruitful," he whispers with his mouth to your forehead as you drift to a well-earned sleep.
𓆸𓆸𓆸𓆸𓆸𓆸𓆸𓆸𓆸𓆸𓆸𓆸𓆸𓆸𓆸𓆸𓆸𓆸
There's no God in my heaven. And Hell belongs to me. King of Curses, they call me. And what I have done to earn that title is between me and the sorcerers I killed. For what, then, am I being rewarded?
My Heaven is in my arms, warm and breathing, probably sore in all the places I touched her tonight. How dare I? How dare I ruin her, maim her unfit to ever love her husband again?
Maybe, if everything had gone right, I would have been her husband. And if my human form was not crippled the same way my brother is, she'd have already become a mother by now. I know of her doubts of being the one crippled, but I know she's fertile. I know she's fertile right now. And I hope I've done one thing in all my life to make her dreams come true.
However, it's also so bittersweet. What will happen once she does bear my child? Our little tea meetings will end, I'll never touch her again, never experience both the peace and the excitement of having her fingers run along my skin.
I don't want this to end. I can't let this end. I can't lose her again.
please don't copy my work, or publish it elsewhere without my consent. all banners are from pinterest.
#jujutsu kaisen#ryomen sukuna#jjk#sukuna x reader#jjk smut#jujutsu kaisen smut#jjk sukuna#jjk angst#sukuna x oc#ryomen sukuna x reader#ryomen sukuna smut#heian era sukuna#twins yuuji and sukuna#jjk fanart#sukuna true form#true form sukuna
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harnessing and using external energies
one of the mistakes i made as a beginner witch is using my own energy to power spells, which is exhausting. a good way to combat that involves channeling energy from an external source - i will use the moon as an example.
no, it's not to say that channeling energy is easier or not exhausting in itself - it's to say that you have options at your disposal to keep yourself from quickly and constantly burning out.
channeling energy - gather energy from an external source such as the moon. i like to imagine a silver string that connects us together, a tether if you will. typically i visualize this energy as a ball of light forming in my core or my hands.
direct - once you've gathered your energy, where do you want it to go? directly into a spell? saved for a rainy day? into a physical object of sorts? or maybe keep it within yourself?
charging - using that energy to power spells, enchantments, items, etc.
battery - store energy for later use - i like using quartz towers - then you can use that to power objects without having to channel energy every. single. time.
you can easily compare this concept to charging electronics.
there's a couple ways to charge a phone - you can either plug it straight into the wall, or charge up your power bank first and use that to charge your phone - channeling and charging in magic follows the same process.
the phone in this example is the vessel that holds energy.
electricity from wall outlet = moon aka energy source
charging cord = tether to the moon for channeling
phone = the thing you're transferring energy to aka charging
the intent to plug your phone in to charge = directing energy
actually plugging your phone in = charging
power bank = energy you gathered and stored away
choosing the outlet vs the power bank = immediate use of lunar energy vs storage for later use
once your phone is charged, what are you gonna do with it? open tumblr? send a text? now you get to decide where that energy is going to be sent and what it'll be used for (storage, spells, enchantments, etc.).
tips & advice
keep in mind that your phone isn't going to charge if it's dead and you only leave it plugged in for like 5 minutes. take your time to sit with the moon, have a conversation, meditate alongside one another, and get to know each other before asking for help.
i don't advise channeling energy directly into yourself to save for later use. it will eventually burn out, drain you, and then you're back to square one.
stored energies still need to be maintained and recharged, just like a battery.
what to do afterwards
sever the tie that connects you to the moon - be nice and give thanks.
if you've used energy to cast a spell immediately after channeling, close out your spell however you want (like, taking down a circle if you've cast one).
if you chose to store that energy away instead, set the vessel aside for later use.
ground yourself to shake off any lingering static, so to speak.
as with anything, your mileage may vary - do what works for you and with whatever energy you choose. good luck!
♡ luna
© 2024 ad-caelestia
#witchblr#witchcraft#witch#witchy#witches of tumblr#magic#channeling energy#charging objects#cosmic witchcraft#cosmic witch#energy work#beginner witchcraft#beginner witch#ad-caelestia
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Visiting Japan is something I dream of doing in the future. How was the process of getting tickets, and how long was the trip planned for? I'm worried about concern of payment and not being able to get hotels or take any trains with the lack of Japanese literacy and inability to pay. Another thing I'm worried about is there being an inefficient use of time. Like for example, if there is a moment where I don't know what to do next and just spend the time thinking of what I COULD do instead.
I booked and paid for the plane tickets and the hotel (on booking dot com) a couple months beforehand and could pretty nicely find the more affordable options, so that part went smoothly for me. Something to look out for is that you have your own private room with a private bathroom (no dorms or shared bathrooms, unless you really want, I guess, they're obviously cheaper) and free wifi. If you want to know my hotel, it was Toyoko Inn in Monzen-nakacho.
I mostly used subways in Tokyo, and... I gotta admit that's where I did run into some trouble on the first day, so I could share these things as a heads-up:
The idea I had was using 72h subway tickets that allow you to travel with subways as much as you want during that time frame. The problem was just that the machines that can scan the QR code when you have ordered one were very few and far between, and in Nihonbashi station where I was supposed to transfer, I finally managed to find only a single machine that accepted the QR code. The other ticket machines didn't accept my foreign card (and I hadn't withdrawn cash yet), so I was stuck there for a bit until I found that one machine.
Getting a suica / pasmo card beforehand should prevent running into this problem (my friend had that instead), although as far as I know, it charges you based on how much you travel, so moving around a lot in public transport may end up being more expensive with it.
If you don't know where to go next, the best advice I can give for figuring something out is to pick a random station in your subway map and google "things to do in [that place]." If it gives anything that sounds remotely interesting, head there, check out some of the suggested places, but also just explore and keep your eyes open for anything interesting that you might run into (you know, any kind of "side quest" stuff). If you have any specific interests, you could also check if there are any places in Tokyo that fulfill them, and you could of course also visit somewhere outside Tokyo too, if you're feeling that.
Some places I visited were Akihabara (no surprises, I actually visited this place many times since it has all the anime stuff, and the UDX building had a bunch of great restaurants), Shibuya, Ikebukuro, Shinjuku, Asakusa, Nakako and Ueno. The places I mainly visited were anime/doujin stores, temples, parks, and other attractions like an aquarium and botanical garden. An onsen could also be something to consider.
In the end, I was pretty much just roaming around a lot with my friend and visiting anything that seemed interesting. A lot of the time I didn't even know where to go the next day and we just decided something on the spot. No regrets!
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tbh dont sweat it, im just passionate abt birds as a side effect of really really Really liking wings,
anyways—late welcome to tumblr! many call it a hellsite due. Several Things. some of them being the eternally broken state of the site that is Not as noticeable casually, but once you know, you know 🧍♂️ but if you want a place where you can be 10 times more nuts and genuine about your interests, a place that is 3 out of 5 times ignored and/or forgotten by the rest of the internet and it's influences, and Also a place to ramble to your heart's content with enough words to (LEGIT]) fit the entirety of Frankenstein in a single post, youre in the right place
Let's start with what i mentioned in tags (which is kind of a secondary way of talking, that unlike adding words To the post itself im like im doing rn, is akin to whispering to the Original Poster (op) or the previous reblogger) of the blog themes:
Blog themes are, first of, activated in your Blog settings, not in the account settings, and it comes with the archive, which is exactly that: the blog archive that can show you Every Single Post that exists in your blog, original or reblogged, including private posts that are only seen by you. And actually, because you can also search in your archive by tag, many have created for themselves tag systems, from basic ones (simple stuff, like are most art tags or someone tagging "cats" and "image" in posts that have images and perhaps a kitty cat) to pretty meticulous ones (think dewey's decimal system. yeah.) (even tho searching tags sometimes doesnt work too well still...)
Second of, once the blog theme is available at [your url].tumblr.com, you can either go search for themes on the site in specific tags (like #theme hunter, #blog themes, #tumblr themes, etc), go to another person's blog and see who did their theme to get that one or a different one from that same theme creator or just. directly make your own if you have some knowledge on html, css and a bit of javascript. If it was made by someone else, its usually pretty easy to edit, and you can do the same with your side pages, where some people put their blog info, about, tag lists or anything really (tho, once i saw someone turn a side page into a space-invaders inspired webgame.... with scores...?)
Also, if you want some privacy, in your main blog settings you can toggle a thing to hide your likes and following. Really, nobody here minds that sorta thing, we dont even know most ppl follower count unless they share it voluntarily. And if anyone Ever tries to moralize keeping likes and following visible, saying that ppl hiding them are suspicious, you can just block them and thats that. blocking here is pretty normal and it doesnt even Show if you blocked someone
tho, speaking of, you can only follow and like from your main blog, even if you can block from other blogs,
here on tumblr, you can have a... indefinite number of blogs? i dont Think i remember seeing anyone testing the limit for that Yet. but tbh, you can have just your main blog and put everything there, or have a few dozen of active blogs
for example, i have this side blog for mcyt and minecraft, my main is more for anything and all, i also have a few fandom specific blogs like a mlp one and undertale/deltarune one. and maybe there Is a post limit of 250 post per day that applies to your main And side blogs, is an account thing, but if you dont have the queue running with like. 5 of those to the maximum of post from the queue per day, you'll be fine (and. be careful deleting sideblogs, if easier to just go to the Members option of a side blog and leave it, than trying to delete it in that specific blog settings. there has been some issues with that second thing Also deleting your main blog, and if your main is gone, everything else too)
and before i jump to more general, site wide tips, all of this was as important to note, the queue (+ scheduling posts) is one of the strongest things about this place. because you can fill your queue up to 1k posts of anything you want, and make it so between certain hrs it posts a number of posts, so you dont have to spam ppl with, for example, art, even if you perfectly can. you can also pause the queue if you want to tag your reblogs for your own tag system, n then unpause, but really, this blog and any other in your account is Your house, your city, we all r just visiting. go nuts
...anyways, in terms of culture in this site, the two most important things are: reblogs and your dashboard
first, keep in mind that while this site is definitely Social, this is not a social media website, is a Blogging website. So reblogging is The most important thing here. you can reblog stuff once, twice, 100+ times every day for a month or longer and is Completely fine. if you dont want to see something, block the tag or the word and it'll be gone from your sight. but if you Do like it, and unless the poster says not to, you can reblog it
dont worry about reblogging Really old things btw. you can turn on timestamps for posts and you'll notice how sometimes people bring back posts from 2018, 2015 or even all way back to 2010 or 2008. it keeps the post circulating and the site alive
and actually, im not sure how much you know of this, but while there Is some kind of algorithm on tumblr with things based in your likes, if you have that option toggled on, the best way to experience tumblr and learn all the little things that comes with it is letting the people Be the algorithm, including yourself. that means instead of letting your likes define your dashboard, follow as many people as you want (the limit is 5k), turn on that reverse chronological dashboard, and interact with others too with reblogs. also, reblogging is really good in the sense that if the original post is deleted, your reblog will still be up unless you delete that post too
ive been in this site for almost 8 years, and ive found that you will find good and bad here the longer you stay, like with anything else, but you can also just... curate your experience more easily than in other places, and with how bad everything else is rn.... thats pretty nice :o
last thing, but you can Also ask any questions: play around with things. your settings, your blog theme, how you interact with the site. i know it feels obvious, but unless it says "delete [thing]?" or it makes something pop up a "are you sure? this will do [thing]" is fine. be silly, nothing will explode
what do u think of my grian design be honest <3
#who will explode is me tho#i adore so so much explaining things but also o(-(#anyways. if someone called alebrijediscordico follows u thats me. thats my main :]#...or wait im not done#there isnt a tag limit last time i checked but only the first 5 to 20 tags are visible in searches (unless you search by Tag)#the limit of Characters in a single tag tho is... around 140. including spaces#and if you see ppl using dots is because you cant use commas in tags. it creates a new tag#and i recommend not using these -> " because sometimes that also creates a new tag and puts it in the very top from all other tags#so it can create confusing interactions#OKAY im done for real now. i think#i might be missing smth but there's jsut. a lot
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family game night
"Don't you fucking dare!" His voice is low, dangerous. A growl more than anything. His hands are slammed down on the table, shaking its contents. No one moves, no one says anything. Instead, they look between the two men.
"Do it, Pete. You owe him, nothing" Nat hisses, her voice loud enough for everyone to hear. It was raw, unfiltered. She caught Jason's sneer from across the table. What a strange situation they have found each other in.
"Let's just think about this," Bruce, ever the pragmatic, says. His hand rests on Jason's taut shoulders. "There is a way to make everyone happy," He says, trying to ease Jason down. It's all for nothing.
Peter leans in, looking at Jason. He feels the rest of them fade away. He only can hear Natasha next to him, his mind is working quick. He has a choice to make, one that wou--
"Batman has a no kill rule, kid. Not me," Dick tenses on the other side of Jason, and Tim lets out a smooth gasp that he passes off as a chuckle.
"Please, Hood. My kill count is triple yours" Natasha speaks in that way that Peter's heard so many times, when the point has been proven and those around her just need a mind numbing reminder. He once saw Thor back away from her with a worried-for-himself expression at her single eyebrow raised.
Unfortunately, the Bats of Gotham have not learned all that she is capable. They cannot access a database that would tell them Natasha Romanoff was the deadliest Avenger. And that the Avengers had no such rule of Killing. It was the last resort, yes. But always an option. Even for Cap.
Dick Grayson's eyes widen. "You-- Kill people?" he whispers, concerned and confused. Peter scoffs at this. They keep treating Natasha as some criminal, an outsider. They talk to him in soft tones, trying to get him away from the big bad Black Widow. They don't even know that, but something about her screams danger. Peter likes it. It makes him feel safe.
He did not know that Dick Grayson's surprise from the assumptions following a recent pedigree exposed. Peter's recent pedigree. The more he looks at Peter, the more he can see the resemblances. His eyes, her color. His hair color, her texture. Both of their acrobatic builds, his height.
Before Natasha can say anything else to incriminate her, Peter makes his decision. "I've got you," She assures him, its low and honest and it warms him. He doesn't remember having a mom, Aunt May was the closest he got. And she was great, amazing. But she would always be his aunt. He wonders if this is what a mothers security feels like. If it is, he's really going to miss it when they leave this strange place, when she goes back to her own life.
"Draw four," He plays the card and leans back into the chair he was in, a smirk on his lips. One mimicked by Natasha and she plays her card next, "Draw Four,"
"Fuck!" Jason roars.
#natasha romanoff in gotham#spiderman in gotham#black widow in gotham#brucie wayne#peter parker in gotham#dick grayson is richard parker#batfamily game night#Im currently writing this fic
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My WIP is currently called 'Shiki Matoba' or 'Came Back Wrong AU,' but I should really call it 'the situation specifically designed in a in a lab to give every single character an ongoing ethics crisis.'
Oh, Hiragi becoming Natori's shiki makes you uncomfortable, Natsume? You hate it when yokai eat each other? Even if it's natural?
Well tough: in this AU, Natori fucked up and turned Matoba into an ayakashi, and he's Natori's shiki now. And he has to eat either human blood or other ayakashi to live. His old clan is also constantly trying to kidnap him, but he swears he's not upset with them OR Natori.
Natori - you had qualms about working with the Matoba clan? Too bad: Matoba nearly died because of YOUR attempted murder, and you're the only one who can maintain your flubbed healing spell to keep him alive. As an ayakashi, now bound to a family no sane yokai will make a contract with.
Speaking of the Matoba family: how are things with the new shiki? The one with internalized ayakashi-ism and undying loyalty?
For bonus points: the eye stealing yokai will accept an eye from the Matoba clan head's personal shiki as payment. So Matoba can have some guilt over choosing the clan and his father's wishes over his father's health and life. As a treat.
And potentially every clan head after can have the temptation of a way to save their own skin at the cost of the clan's power.
Aaaand now Matoba's father's dead, and Matoba's refusing to become the new clan head's (not Shinoubu) shiki for *totally irrational ayakashi reasons* he swears. He just had an oopsie 'accidentally psychically manipulate your only healer/ confessed hopeless crush/ rival clans member into making a contract with you in a blind panic' moment for no reason.
The entire Matoba clan gets a moral quagmire there: the new clan head is a little sus, but ayakashi ARE irrational and their special little ayakashi was really upset about Shinobou being passed over for clan head. Is it really okay to leave him unsupervised with his only healer/ confessed hopeless crush/ rival clans member?
But also, they need Natori to keep him alive. So they can't take the nuclear option, or even cut him off and risk any of their enemies killing him either. Surely gently kidnapping Matoba and "helping him come to his senses" is the best option here- they can burn the clan head bridge if they need to after he's home. (Opinions on the necessity, practicality, and greater good of the last part vary. Civil war is a distinct possibility.)
Meanwhile: Matoba wrestles with the guilt of forcing Natori to give him his blood to eat when there's a secret third option he's just being an *irrational ayakashi* about.
Hiragi, Urihime, and Sasago have background ick about the inappropriate master/ shiki behavior (Urihime and Sasago more than Hiragi, though even she finds the literal just sleeping together weird.)
Takuma has STRONG FEELINGS about letting the little shit turned ayakashi who *psychically manipulated his mentee into a giant clusterfuck* into his house. But he also doesn't have any better ideas, and isn't about to cut off his formal apprentice (mandated after the healing spell fiasco.)
Yorishima has NO INTEREST and NO RESPONSIBILITY in helping resolve any of this mess, thank you very much. Even if he has some unique insight into complicated human-ayakashi healing.
I'm softballing Tanuma- he gets to have his cute lil teenage friend worries about being curious when Natsume's very firmly steering him away from ever knowing WTF's going on with Natori and his really friendly shiki.
Nishimura, like. Feels really conflicted about his *dead certainty* that his favorite idol and the idol's chronically ill friend are a couple. They say they're just friends- is it an invasion of their privacy to insist otherwise? Is he minimizing the depths of male friendship by insisting there must be more?
(The universe is testing Kitamoto's patience, not his morality, with Nishimura's fandom nonsense.)
I go by manga timeline, so Sasada is Sir Not Appearing In This Book, the canon divergence blissfully parting around her.
Taki's deal is still percolating- I have to do *something* with her two degrees of separation from the Matoba clan, but I don't know what.
I don't think Nyanko-sensei's getting any extra *ethical* issues- he doesn't care that much about ethics in the first place. Just external pressure to become Natsume's formal shiki since the exorcist community isn't as blasé about powerful, self-taught kids after The Fuck Up.
I'm fighting the "why do the Fujiwara's let their 15 yo relative stay overnight with a 23 yo idol?" angle kicking and screaming, but its gravitational pull is starting to look inescapable. Matoba became undead an ayakashi at 18, if he's strong enough to have a human form (which. ofc he is) there are going to be QUESTIONS about why he's living with an idol who looks five years older than him.
(Yes, Matoba has a driver's license stating he is 22- no it doesn't help with the scrutiny. There is just some inevitable speculation and conclusions about the chronically ill NEET who never uses his last name due to "family issues" who lives with the idol who got PTSD from saving his life.)
I actually do have an ending in mind, though I'm going to let canon developments lead the way.
OC Matoba clan head eventually dies "naturally," as Matoba clan heads do, and Shinoubu takes over.
This leads to a shakeup regarding prejudice against "weak" exorcists. (You don't need spiritual powers to politic, or very much to dodge a giant blob and open an umbrella. She IS a little evil (pending contradiction by further developments in canon), but hardly the worst.) Someone points out the "eye of the Matoba clan head's shiki" loophole due to this lack of trust, and the Matoba clan approves the "loan" of a shiki to the now closely-associated Natori clan.
Yorishima's expertise does bear fruit, so Matoba is expected to eventually fully recover. (But remain an ayakashi.) In Matoba's POV, this is the happy ending- he gets to live with Natori for the rest of Natori's life, and he has a formal way to escape future conflict with the grab-bag of Matoba clan heads.
But he's getting stronger- able to maintain his human form for longer, and make more changes to it.
So Shuuichi suggests leaving the industry- taking his still active identity, and living as a human. To not be anyone's shiki.
(Natori CANNOT have a romantic relationship with a subordinate. Nope, nope, nope. Absolutely not. Especially after their specific experiences. But just being an ayakashi isn't a deal breaker.
However, his world view values freedom and independence, so he'd suggest the idea anyways.)
(Matoba might not be able to return to the clan after a disavowal of that magnitude. The clan will definitely never trust him again.)
There'd be an epilogue from Natsume's POV revealing Matoba's decision, directly echoing whatever the canon ending of Natsume's Book of Friends does.
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