#yes this is based off a taylor swift quote

[musicoftheheart]

the marauders just chilling in their dorm:

sirius: hey so, serious question—

james: 'serious' like genuine or like you?

sirius: genuine

remus, muttering: doubtful, but okay

sirius: why can we eat salad but not grass?

remus:

peter:

james:

james: he has a point—

[snek-of-eden]

Star Trek AMV Masterpost (ongoing)

I feel like amvs are so often forgotten in fandom culture, so here's a list of my favourites! All are on YouTube, and all credit goes to the original creators. the links should take you straight there. (the majority of these are spirk, but there's definitely variety!!) some of these are pretty popular, others obscure, but they're all amazing and you should totally check them out. My all time fav ones are marked with a 💙.

Spirk:

Star Trek || A Thousand Years - [Kirk/Spock] -- this one is super well known, incredibly crafted, a beautiful homage to TOS Spirk and their journey that fades seamlessly into AOS through Spock Prime's memories 💙

Kirk/Spock - If I Were Gay -- absolutely hilarious TOS amv that feels like a parody, I laughed my ass off. all the suggestive scenes and hella funny lyrics to accompany it

Kirk & Spock │Renegades -- amazing x ambassadors song, the lyrics fit them so well and the colouring was spot on. TOS going through the original series and the movies!! 💙

Kirk & Spock │ Come right back to you -- exploration of TOS spirk's bond interspersed with show quotes and the most melancholic soundtrack. shed a tear at this one

Spock and Kirk Feel Again - A Star Trek Music Video -- absolute BANGER of a One Republic song, a TOS amv focusing on Spock and Kirk (with some stunning song parallels to Spock's emotions and the lyrics!)

Star Trek TOS | Two Slow Dancers - [Kirk + Spock] -- would you like to cry today? do you want to sob into your pillow? then this is the video for you. Mitski and TOS Spirk together is a gorgeous combo, and the editing is /on point/

Star Trek - Can't Help Falling In Love (Kirk/Spock) -- an oldie but a goodie, Jim and Spock's ballad of love all throughout TOS and the movies

Keep Holding On (Kirk/Spock) -- its the combo you never knew you needed! glee and Star Trek!! show tunes, glitter, and a completely TOS movie based amv about the events of Search For Spock and The Voyage Home

Running Up That Hill (Kirk/Spock) -- Kate Bush cover and Star Trek TOS? yes fucking please. don't diss the Kate Bush, people. ITS NOT CRINGE HERE. all your swoon-worthy, love-for-the-ages spirk content, some suggestive scenes spliced in the middle, a lot of amok time hehe

K/S (Kirk/Spock) - FUN -- adrenaline inducing AOS spirk fighting amv set to Troye Sivan!! some seriously talented editing and a very pretty AOS colouring

Spirk 'Blank Space' -- christ, this video was what got me to actually watch AOS. One of the only AOS amvs I cherish with my whole heart. the song is a cover of Taylor Swift's Blank Space - and imo it's even better than the original. I've ranted about the editing on a lot of these but this one just about takes the cake. fucking gorgeous 💙

Spock/Kirk - Blue (Star Trek TOS/AOS) -- angsty af and set to Halsey's 'Colors', this one'll get you sobbing. more slow-paced. also, both TOS and AOS!!

Spock / Kirk - Stay {TOS/AOS} -- Hurts is such an underrated artist but so many of their songs are spirk coded!! Very pretty edit, lots of parallels

Kirk/Spock - Landslide -- Fleetwood Mac and some lovely melancholic TOS movie reminiscing about Kirk and Spock's relationship as they're growing older and losing their youth

Kirk/Spock - Wait for It -- calling all Hamilton fans, this one'll be right up your alley. TOS fading into AOS and focusing primarily on Kirk and Spock's dynamic through Spock's perspective. fast paced and fucking wicked

Star Trek: Kirk/Spock || Hold on -- the obligatory Hold On amv (I feel like every fandom has one lol). AOS, spirk, some great angst here!

James T. Kirk:

James T. Kirk | I'll Be Good -- absolutely STUNNING exploration of AOS Kirk's character and psyche, done with gorgeous editing and colours and scene selection. I'm not a huge AOS fan but I played this on repeat for a week. Song is I'll Be Good by Jaymes Young, which is incredibly Jim Kirk coded. so so amazing 💙

Icarus | Jim Kirk [HD] -- snappy cuts and a great portrayal of AOS Kirk. Spirky undertones but nothing explicit. super poignant lyrics

Little Talks - Captain Kirk Tribute: A Star Trek Music Video -- captivating, beautifully edited amv by First Officer Nims (who make some of the best amvs I've watched), one of the most meaningful TOS Kirk videos I've had the pleasure of finding. It's constantly in my head, in my heart, in my soul. 10/10 💙

{James T. Kirk} BI BI BI -- all y'all bi Jim truthers, this one's for you. all of Jim's fruitiest moments from TOS (and behind the scenes) gathered into one camp edit and set to the glorious sounds of NSYNC!! featuring "are there men on this planet", "they seem to be bisexual" and Jim nearly kissing McCoy ;) 💙

jim kirk's babiest moments | fanvid -- not exactly an amv but it's close enough!! exactly what it says on the tin - TOS Jim being the most babygirl ever, pouting, flirting with spock and bones, fighting people by throwing himself at them, and much more. go watch it, you'll thank me

Spones:

What's On Your Mind | Spones || Star Trek [TOS] -- a masterfully put together and downright hilarious eighties-themed spock/bones TOS amv!! (featuring both Nimoy and Kelley's voices in the actual song recording)

Spock & Bones • Hopeless place -- two words: RIHANNA COVER. it's short, its AOS, it's fuckin Rihanna. what is there not to love? I have nothing more to say. go listen to Rihanna

The Night We Met || Spones -- Lord Huron and TOS Spones amv, it's just a general lovely video, great editing and the lyrics fit them so well. I felt Lots of Emotions watching this, and so will you

[Star Trek] Spock/McCoy - Please Don't Leave Me -- beautifully put-together video for TOS' Spock and Bones. It's giving so much 'we're divorced but still in love' energy. painful and funny and the bridge of the song is just *screams incoherently* 💙

You Had A Bad Day -Spock/McCoy *Slash* -- sobbing at this one, TOS and absolutely chefs kiss. scene selection is on point, it tells a full story. creator has found what I consider to be the holy grail of Bones' best angsty moments

Star Trek In General:

Star Trek - This Is Me -- I will be preaching about this video for the rest of my fucking life. think of every positive adjective you can; they all do nothing to describe how wonderful this amv is. Greatest Showman is good on its own... when you add Star Trek into the mix something beautiful happens. an absolute anthem of positivity and inclusivity and everything Star Trek is at its heart. Clips taken from every show, but especially DS9, Discovery and the AOS movies!!! probably my favourite on the whole list 💙

Star Trek || I'll keep coming -- very very well done HD AOS amv about the whole cast. feels like a movie. the creator has put so much effort into this and it pays off!! great homage to AOs as a whole

Star Trek | You Are Loved -- AOS tribute to the soundtrack of Lights by Sleeping At Last. Perfect cuts, great lyrics, big fan

[Star Trek: TOS] Party Rock Anthem -- the video for those who want to bust their ass laughing. superb chaos, you will have no idea what's happening and it will be fabulous

Star Trek DS9 - Last Friday Night -- the DS9 group bullshitting around and having a whale of a time for almost four minutes straight. ever wanna show a friend just how weird Star Trek really is? this'll do it. it's like if three hundred punch drunk aliens threw a queer party! wahoo!

Assorted Others:

Garak x Bashir - Hooked -- sexy, dangerous, catchy garashir amv with perfect beat drops and lyrics to die for. fucking sweet, I have this on repeat

Undisclosed Desires | Deep Space Nine -- DS9 Bashir/Garak slash, amazing editing and a sick ass song. Really shows off their - again - dangerous dynamic and the 'I can make him better' 'I can accept his violence' aspects of their relationship

King of Shadow ★ Garashir -- a more intimate, kind-hearted look into Bashir/Garak's relationship, less fast-paced and on-edge. Superb and filled with lies and whispers. love this one!

ϟ twenty years || Jim|Spock|Bones [TOS] -- melancholic but still quick-paced TOS McSpirk exploration. goes through the original series and the movies

Scotty/Uhura- "Hey Soul Sister" -- sweet and utterly adorable lil scotty/uhura amv. fluff fluff and more fluff!! big fan, I am such a simp for the cuteness omg

Garak/Bashir | ST: DS9 | Some Boys -- back on the dangerous garashir shit, this is the stuff of my best nightmares. amazing editing and the song choice is spot on. I've had the single by Death Cab For Cutie on Spotify repeating for a week *heart eyes*

Kathryn Janeway || Soldier -- I'm a big Voyager fan, and this is the perfect tribute to Janeway. It shows exactly how her character works, getting right into her head, and the whole thing is action packed. Paced spectacularly and argh just amazing

Those are some of my favourites!! Please go check some of them out! There are so many more, and the list is growing every day. AMV creators are amazing and I'm kissing you all on the forehead. thank you for your service 💙. I'm in the process of making a public YouTube playlist with all of these on it, so if you want to have that I'll probably link it eventually!!

[rowdyluv]

Peter

based off of Taylor Swift’s song from The Tortured Poets Department

warning: a bit sad, longing for ex-lover, use of y/n

Ethan Edwards x fem!Reader

summary: Ethan and reader childhood friends —> lovers —> break up —> reader heartbreakingly waiting for his return.

author’s note: the photos are intended to tell the story them growing up. the last last picture are two quotes from the book “better than the movies” by Lynn Painter. (can be found on Amazon, books a million, barnes & noble, etc. links were too long to post)

Ethan and (y/n)’s older childhood friends always joked the two would fall in love one day. It was always a big laugh between the two of you because what business do 8 year olds have thinking about love?

In a blink of an eye you’re dancing at your end of the year eighth grade formal together, your heart has never reacted the way it was at that specific moment. Confused and a bit scared you kept your head staring at the floor while your hands were firmly placed on Ethan’s shoulders. His hands placed awkwardly on your waist. He cleared throat and paused both of your movements. “Hey (y/n)? Can I do something and you promise you not get mad if you don’t like it? We can just forget about it after if it’s weird.” His words were rushed and hands shaking. Your eyes connected with his, a slight nod yes to confirm you were okay with whatever it was he was asking for. As if the world moved in slow motion and no one else was in the school’s lobby, where the formal was happening but the two of you, Ethan ducked his head down just the few inches he needed to in order to give a quick kiss.

The first kiss for both of you.

Awkward, yet not weird for either of you. The beginning of what turned into a long beautiful journey. Until it wasn’t beautiful.

꧁꧂

“(Y/N) I am so tired of this repetitive argument. It happens over and over. I got accepted to Michigan and I got a scholarship for hockey. Their program is notorious for building up their athletes and getting them drafted. Drafted! You’ve known since we were kids that the NHL is what I wanted for myself.” Ethan tried to keep himself composed until he couldn’t. His desire, compassion, and dedication to chasing his dream often overshadowed his love and dedication to you. His childish mannerisms peaking through. “I just want to know where I fit into this plan? This future of yours.” You tried to keep your voice strong and unwavering but just like each time before the lump in your throat prevented you from even being able to breathe properly.

He sat down on the edge of your bed. Quiet minutes passed before he finally spoke again. “Maybe there isn’t an us in the future..” His words are so quiet you aren’t sure if you heard him correctly. “E?” You whimpered. Tears streaming one after the other. He didn’t look at you right away. Knowing if he did his resolve would shatter.

Taking a deep breath, starting over. Looking at you after a couple minutes had passed by and leaning over to wipe your cheeks dry. “I know this is going to be hard to hear. It’s killing me to even say it. It killed me to even think about it recently. I’m going to be gone for a long time for school. I won’t be returning home. My parents will be coming there over the holidays. It will be easier with training. I can’t ask you to sit here while you’re going to school yourself and be tied to me. Especially when we will never see each other. Neither of us have the money for traveling to and from. I’ve been so physically sick thinking about leaving you. We’ve only argued since I decided but honey this is what’s best for me and my dreams. I’m sorry I’m being so selfish but I can’t pass this up. If I stay here I take a chance at never having an opportunity at the NHL at least I know I’ll have an opportunity there.” Your tears stopped at some point. Sadness turned to numbness. Lost to the words he was saying.

“(Y/N/N). I can go and grow up while I’m gone. Get drafted. Or not. Then I’ll come find you if you’re still single. . We can live our dreams then. I just can’t ask you to sit here and be miserably alone.” Pressing a quick kiss to your forehead he left your house. That was the last thing he said to you in person. You didn’t see him again before he left. He tried but you declined. Not wanting to hurt anymore than you already were.

꧁꧂

You just watched Ethan’s NHL debut with the New Jersey Devil two weeks ago. Pride swelled in your heart for him but heartbreak also overtook you. He never came back for you. You’re both 24 now, he could’ve come back after college since he was drafted pre-degree but he never did. Since ‘goodbye for now’ turned into ‘goodbye’ you sat down at your desk and started writing him a letter. You were going to mail it to his mom’s house. She can mail it to him.

Dear Ethan,

I hoped you'd return with your feet on the ground, tell me all that you'd learned because love is never lost when perspective is earned and you said you would come and get me, but we were only 17. My shelf life on the fantasies has expired. Please forgive me, Ethan, I really tried to hold on to the days you were mine. But the young girl turned into a woman who sits by her window has turned out the light.

You said you were going to grow up and you were going to come find me. Promises that were oceans deep, but never to keep.

Sincerely,

(Y/N)

Little did you know he was back in town at his parents’ house and received the letter himself. He was there to see you. He was back for you now that he was settled and could care for you both properly. But he was too late. You had shut the door on him. You stopped supporting him quietly. Stopped following the scores of the games and watching. . Ethan played the rest of the season terribly, not having his number fan, supporter there. It didn’t matter if he knew or not that she was always cheering him on. It just solidified for him, he no longer had his rock. His reason for being. That he fucked up all those years ago. That he no longer had a reason for what he thought was his dream. His dream was really your dreams. He wanted the future you wanted with him and now he will never have it all because of his selfishness back at 17.

[bookworm-1196]

Part 5 of my yearly wrap up : my 30 favorite ships that I shipped throughout the year

1. Percabeth (Percy and Annabeth from the PJO & HOO series by Rick Riordan) the first ship I ever shipped I want a love like theirs

2. Locklyle (Lucy and Lockwood from Lockwood & Co series by Jonathan Stroud) I love slow burn couples in book series where you see the characters evolve over the years and where the romance isn’t the main plot

3. Herongraystairs (Will Jem and Tessa from the the Infernal Devices trilogy by Cassandra Clare) always thinking about them in some way shape or form I want a love like theirs

All these ships are my Roman Empire btw they all share the top spot there’s no ranking

4. Pip and Ravi from AGGGTM by Holly Jackson - badass intelligent talented girl x supportive funny guy who loves her like it’s breathing trope you will always have my heart (funny that seems to be a consistent pattern with these ships lol)

5. Malec (Magnus and Alec from the Shadowhunter Chronicles by Cassandra Clare) yes I know they’re everyone’s favorite along with Herongraystairs I’m basic bla-bla-bla but have you considered that they’re popular bc they’re such a top tier ship? All the ships I mentioned are ships I could write an essay or multiple essays about just get me all the books they’re in so I can quote stuff and around ten to twenty hours and I’ll write an essay of 292749299171883902883 words about how much I love them

6. Pandalily (Pandora Lovegood and Lily Evans from the Marauders fandom loosely based off of the HP series) I’m writing a fic about them I have to put them in the top 10 even if I’ve been relatively inactive in the fandom and when it comes to actually writing my fic (sorry I’ve been busy with school and existential crises lately)

7. Wolfstar (Sirius Black and Remus Lupin from the Marauders fandom especially from the fic All The Young Dudes by MsKingBean89 because in that fic the angst and the slow burn are unparalleled)

8. Jegulus (James Potter and Regulus Black from the Marauders fandom, especially from the fics crimson rivers by bizarrestars, only the brave by solmussa and art heist baby! by otrtbs) not the biggest shipper bc i read too many fics of them in too short a time and got jegulus overexposure and needed to take a break from reading fanfics for a while but in those three fanfics especially crimson rivers and only the brave they’re incredible

9. Dorlene (Dorcas Meadowes and Marlene McKinnon from the Marauders fandom) I want to write a fic about them next. In my head they’re sooo imgonnagetyouback by Taylor Swift coded

10. Kanej (Kaz and Inej from Six of Crows by Leigh Bardugo) soulmates in my opinion but not in the “they were destined for each other” SJM way but in a “their souls fit together like pieces of a puzzle and everything falls into place perfectly because their love is just so cosmically powerful, they weren’t destined for each other but they loved each other so much from now on they will meet and love each other in every lifetime” kind of way if that makes sense (same goes for all the ships here especially Herongraystairs)

11. Herondaisy (otherwise known as James and Cordelia from The Last Hours by Cassandra Clare) the unrequited lining the angst they’re just so perfect

12. Kitty (Kit and Ty from The Dark Artifices and soon to be The Wicked Powers main couple by Cassandra Clare) I love angst and pining and an excruciatingly long slow burn so you know I love Kit and Ty

13. Nick and Charlie from Heartstopper by Alice Oseman - it seems like your typical teenage love story but it’s actually so much more than that at the same time, I want what they have

14. Everlark (Katniss and Peeta from The Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins) a beautiful love story

15. Sizzy (Simon and Isabelle from The Mortal Instruments by Cassandra Clare) I love them so much

16. Firstprince (Alex and Henry from Red White and Royal Blue by Casey McQuiston) RWRB is perhaps one of my favorite romance books ever and I love the “exchanging love letters” trope

17. Helnik (Nina and Matthias from Six of Crows by Leigh Bardugo) I knew Matthias was going to die bc of spoilers from before I read SoC but it still hurt so much

18. Solangelo (Will and Nico from HoO, ToA and TSATS by Rick Riordan) the sun and the star wasn’t one of my favorite books of the year but I still love them

19. Ruegard (Clarisse and Silena from PJO by Rick Riordan) I joined TikTok this year and discovered they were shipped by a pretty big part of the PJO fandom and now I need to reread PJO.)

20. Eva and Celeste from It Goes Like This by Miel Moreland - I highly recommend this book it’s abt a queer sapphic band who get broken up and now they come back together to perform one last time. The main couple, Eva and Celeste have such a beautiful story I don’t want to spoil anything

21. Teo and Aurelio from The Sunbearer Trials by Aiden Thomas - they got together too soon in the second book in my (very very biased towards excruciating slow burns) opinion but I loved them in the first book

22. Kit and Theo from The Pairing by Casey McQuiston - the fact that we have two Kits and two Teo/Theos on this list but in different ships (also two Wills) is kinda funny. I really loved their story and I want a love that’s so profound but also so fun like theirs.

23. Thomastair (Thomas and Alastair from The Last Hours by Cassandra Clare) I love them so much

24. Ghostwriter (Lucy and Jesse from The Last Hours by Cassandra Clare) they’re a big part of why Chain of Iron is one of my favorite TSC books but also their relationship conflict in CoT about not being able to kiss for a weird illogical reason was just not believable

25. Gracestopher (Grace and Christopher from The Last Hours by Cassandra Clare) some people ship them but in a platonic way some people ship them in a romantic way I understand both sides and honestly as long as we got to see the two of them develop a close bond based on love and trust it doesn’t entirely matter. Unfortunately CoT broke my heart

26. Ineffable Husbands (Aziraphale and Crowley from Good Omens) I watched Good Omens at the end of 2023 and read Good Omens the book at the start of January 2024 I still think of them from time to time and I’m not really up to date on s3 news but apparently s3 is going to be much shorter 😢 again that thing I said about loving excruciating angst and pining

27. Rosekiller (Evan Rosier and Barty Crouch jr from the Marauders fandom specifically in the fic “I’m not going to teach him to dance with you” by greensenne (not 100% sure I haven’t messed up the name of the fic but 100% sure that’s what the fic author is called if ever you want to check it out. It’s a no Voldemort AU with lots of Speak Now by Taylor Swift vibes) they’re Wolfstar but evil/morally gray Slytherins depending on the fic basically)

28. Jurdan (Jude and Cardan from The Folk of the Air series by Holly Black)

29. Fierrochase (Alex and Magnus from Magnus Chase and the Gods of Asgard by Rick Riordan) I discovered the TSC fandom bc I kept reading Pinterest posts with “Magnus and Alec” in them and thinking huh I don’t remember that part of the story from Magnus Chase and also why is there consistently a typo in Alex’s name?? I love their dynamic so much I NEED to reread MCGA next year

30. Edwin and Charles from the Dead Boy Detectives TV show on Netflix (why does Netflix keep cancelling shows I love? I watched it and then right after Netflix cancelled it)

Honorable mentions go to Just for the summer by Abby Jimenez my second favorite romance book I read this year after The Pairing.

[charsoamerican]

OK so I made a Taylor Swift, the inheritance games playlist

The Way I Loved You - giving tfg when Avery was mad over jameson being over protective

I Can See You - such a hot song but also describing averyxjameson relationship perfectly

Bigger Than The Whole Sky - describes Avery and Toby’s relationship so well and just them especially the lyrics “You were more then just a short time” and “Everything to come has turned to ashes” so yeah

Sparks Fly - totally avery talking about Jameson like “you’re the kind of reckless that should send me running” and “get me with those green eyes baby as the lights go down, give me something that will haunt me when you’re not around” and “my mind forgets to remind me that you’re a bad idea” LIKE

Mine - fr just the lyric “you made a rebel of a careless man’s careful daughter” think about that is literally perfect

Long Story Short - it’s so perfect and also this song can literally be a summary of the romance in the whole series but anyway THESE lyrics; “no more keeping score, now I just keep you warm” and “if the shoe fits walk in it til your high heels break” fits Avery perfectly, she was literally broke and turned into the worlds richest teenager overnight, like she obvi didn’t know everything immediately

Evermore - it’s like sad but stillllll “in the cracks of light I dreamed of you” because when she was in a coma the first thing she heard was Jamies voice and then “it was real enough to get me through” because they never really called it love in thl but it was there (omg that was so cringy forget I said that)

Call It What You Want - literally this whole song is just perfect for them every lyric is perfect but what stood out to me was “you don’t need to save me, but would you run away with me?” Because she didn’t need Jameson to protect her by preventing her from doing things, but she still wanted to do it with him instead

Fearless - idk but there is just something so fitting with the name of this song like jameson literally took her hand and drove her head first fearless “you’re just so cool, run your hands through your hair” also *reminder* Jameson is cool, but on serious note, “I don’t why but with you I’d dance in a storm in my best dress, fearless” bc yes

Mastermind - them. they literally are masterminds. “And the first night that you saw me I knew I wanted your body” also this line “you see, all the wisest women had to do it this way, because we were born to be the pawn of every lovers game” works with how she felt like Jameson just thought of her as part of the game and not a human with feeling in tig

Wildest Dreams - I just feel like they would literally do anything for eachother and this is totally not on this playlist because of the “he’s so tall and handsome as hell” line and it’s also definitely not about Jameson 😳

Lavender Haze - the lyrics are just so perfect like “I’ve been under scrutiny, you handle it beautifully” and “I’m damned if I do give a damn what people say” AND “They’re bringing up my history, but you weren’t even listening” THESE LYRICS OH MY

Midnight Rain (“he was sunshine I was midnight rain” because Jameson is literally golden retriever on the inside and Avery is very chill and yeah this is just me fantasizing soo)

Wonderland (this song literally IS jameson and Avery. Get ready for me to basically quote the whole song “Didn’t they tell us don’t rush into things? Didn’t you flash your green eyes at me? Haven’t you heard what becomes of curious minds?” LIKE WHAT? I’m convinced jlb wrote this romance based off of this song and also “didn’t you calm my fears with a Cheshire Cat smile?” His smile is literally described as “a Cheshire Cat smile” in the first book before Avery starts calling it devastating. “We found wonderland, you and I got lost in it, life was never worse, but never better”

Anti-Hero - literally should be jamies theme song. People always are like “Grayson is so depressed he deserves better” but what about Jameson?? Like he literally blames himself for Emily’s death and basically sh when jumping off the cliff. He always compares himself to Grayson. Like the lyrics “pierced through the heart but never killed” he literally is almost if not just as much broken as Grayson is but he’s just better at hiding it and covering it up with a smile, but I do think Grayson needs therapy desperately like jlb please help him

You’re on your own kid - This song fits Avery soo well like after her mom died no one really could take care of her, I mean I know Libby did, and I love Libby, but it was just different? And also when she inherited the billions of dollars everyone hated her pretty much so yeah. I think the lyric “Everything you lose is a step you take” it just is Avery

Paris (it just relates to Avery and Jameson sm, like the lyric “I’m so in love i might stop breathing, drew a map on your bedroom ceiling” Avery made a point about how they want to go places together. “Romance is not dead if you keep it just yours”

Other ones that I’m too lazy to explain

Style

Vigilante Sh*t

Forever Winter

I Did Something Bad

Don’t Blame Me

Paper Rings (I’m a big xandermax and nashlibby stan)

London Boy

Getaway Car

Miss Americana and the heartbreak prince

Blank Space

[the1975attheirverybest]

The 10 year on/off narrative maylors keep pushing is annoying to me. Yes we don’t know exactly how much contact they had starting in 2020 but just based on things Matty has said himself, and that Taylor reveals in her lyrics (subject to interpretation), it really doesn’t seem like a continuous period. Not even close. They dated extremely briefly in 2014. Matty says in an interview post-NMEs that he hadn’t spoken to her in like 6 yrs until that award show. Okay so that brings us from 2014/5 to 2020 with no speaking. Down the drain goes 6/10 yrs of the “10 year on-off.” By this time Matty is with FKA which by all accounts was a very serious relationship that didn’t end for good until Spring 2022. The boys didn’t bring Jack Antonoff into the process of BFIAFL until late 2021. Jack is the only reason he crossed paths with Taylor again and got to work on Midnights. So Matty and Taylor weren’t even friends again until late 2021 or early 2022. Post-Twigs Matty was seeing several different women which is well documented as occurring up to March 2023. Taylor was obviously with Joe. Taylor writes in TTPD about fantasizing about Matty but seems to make it a point to say it never got physical until after Joe. Could be a lie but she’s not shy about admitting to affairs. So someone explain to me how this is a 10 year on/off instead of on-OFF-on with the on totaling 4-5 months maximum. This is all without even accounting for the amount of time they were on opposite sides of the planet during 2021-early 2023 making physical interaction impossible such as when Taylor was with Joe on various movie and tv sets.

As I’ve been saying, I don’t know Taylor enough to speak on this. They have common friends and run in similar circles sometimes so it’s very possible that they’ve interacted. At the very least we know they could’ve been in touch since collaborating on her album. All of which is normal and understandable.

But I think to say anything more about this would be to cross a line. it strikes me as disrespectful to assume that every move that with TS or Matty make are about one thing and one thing only. I mean, Matty was out there posting Simulacra and Simulation quotes and posting a book on American theatre and yall are out here talking about “clues for Taylor swift.” Do you not see how that belittles the thoughtfulness and work that he’s put into the show??? It’s also quite presumptuous to think that either of them would wanna “send signals” for fans to decode. Why would they feel like they need complete strangers (who destroyed their relationship) to know if they’re trying again?????

Also, if yall really believe that they’re together / trying to be together again wouldn’t letting them have their privacy be best given all that’s happened? Intruding on them would only bring back the hate and attention. Idk bro.

[uwererightiwaswronguwereright]

A list of song quotes i like + recommendations (will be updated as i live life):

Give me recs based off what u see!

“Love after you / A miracle that’s dying out / Every stupid poem you would write about / Is laughing in my hands” - Love After You (Madds Buckley)

“I scratch while you relax / Ruffling feathers watching storm clouds pass / Hoping I’ll make you hate the thunder too / Digging in my claws will make you hate me too” - DogBird (Madds Buckley)

“And we settle in the comfort of / The bones that rest beneath / And I’d lose every penny that I find / To keep your soul with mine” - Anything Anything Anything (Madds Buckley)

“I’m the gamble to your loaded dice” - I Lose to You (Madds Buckley)

“Be the light that I see when the light has left me / When you hold me I feel holy / When you kiss me I bleed” - Wine and Wheat (Madds Buckley) listen to it

“You’re slipping through my fingers with the sands of time / And I’m missing the piece of you that used to be mine” - Everything Changes in Time (Madds Buckley)

“Wonder if better now having survived” - Angel of Small Death and the Codeine Scene (Hozier)

“Anyway, you say you're too busy / Saving everybody else to save yourself / And you don't want no help, oh, well / That's the story to tell” - It’s Called Freefall (Rainbow Kitten Surprise - cover by Paris Paloma)

“If the sun don't rise / 'Til the summertime / Forgive my northern attitude / Oh, I was raised on little light” - Northern Attitude (Noah Kahan ft. Hozier) ironic because i’m in a hot desert climate

“And I'll dream each night of some version of you / That I might not have, but I did not lose / Now you're tire tracks and one pair of shoes / And I'm split in half, but that'll have to do” - Stick Season (Noah Kahan)

“Putting food on the table selling bombs and guns / It's quicker and easier to eat your young” - Eat Your Young (Hozier)

“And all things end / All that we intend is scrawled in sand / Or slips right through our hands / And just knowing / That everything will end / Should not change our plans / When we begin again” - All Things End (Hozier)

“I wanna run against the world that's turnin' / I'd movе so fast that I'd outpace the dawn / I wanna be gonе” - De Selby Part 2 (Hozier)

“Of the goodness, love, I still carry for you / That I'd walk so far just to take / The injury of finally knowing you” - Unknown / Nth (Hozier)

“My love, you're something special / I've never met someone like you / You'd make me fall from heaven” - The Fruits (Paris Paloma)

“The sky set to burst / The gold and the rust / The color erupts / You filling my cup / The sun coming up / Like I lived my whole life / Before the first light” - First Light (Hozier)

“And have your guarded heart be lifted like a child up by the hand / In some town that just means "Home" to them / With no translator left to sound / A butchered tongue still singin' here above the ground” - Butchered Tongue (Hozier)

“When you hate the body you are in / Oh, love, you're actin' just for him / As he counts his gold and green in his ivory tower / Our fear, it lines his pockets, love, so take that rage and bottle up” - as good a reason (Paris Paloma)

“We're born at night / So much of our lives / Is just carving through the dark / To get so far / And the hardest part / Is who we are” - Who We Are (Hozier)

“All of me changed / Like midnight / Rain, he wanted it comfortable / I wanted that pain” - Midnight Rain (Taylor Swift)

“But I'm in the trees, I'm in the breeze / My footsteps on the ground / You'll see my face in every place / But you can't catch me now” - Can’t Catch Me Now (Olivia Rodrigo)

“Because your child will be smarter than you and their children will be smarter than them / Each generation smarter than the last / And these trees will grow and grow until there's an entire orchard of you / And yes they will get old, yes they will get sick, yes they will die / But in the process they will discover” - Apple (The Narcissist Cookbook)

“When my time comes around / Lay me gently in the cold, dark earth / No grave can hold my body down / I'll crawl home to her” - Work Song (Hozier)

“On sunny days I go out walking / I end up on a tree-lined street / I look up at the gaps of sunlight / I miss you more than anything” - Francis Forever (Mitski)

“On some level, I think I always understood / That a ship could never really love an anchor / So, I did the only thing that I could / And severed the rope to set you sailing from my harbor” - Never Love an Anchor (The Crane Wives)

“And I'll be okay / Admiring from afar / Cause even when she's next to me / We could not be more far apart” - She (Dodie)

“Cause there were pages turned with the bridges burned / Everything you lose is a step you take / So make the friendship bracelets / Take the moment and taste it / You've got no reason to be afraid” - You’re On Your Own, Kid (Taylor Swift)

“Leave all your love and your longing behind / You can't carry it with you if you want to survive” - Dog Days Are Over (Florence + the Machine)

“We creep up on extinction / I pull your arms right in / I weep and say goodnight, love / While my organs pack it in / And here it is, our final night alive” - As the World Caves In (Matt Maltese)

“With each love I cut loose, I was never the same / Watching still living roots be consumed by the flame / I was fixed on your hand of gold / Laying waste to my lovin' long ago” - Would That I (Hozier)

“C'mere to me, I wish I was a mayfly on the River Tay / I'd fit all my joys and my pleasures in one perfect day / I wish I was the sunlight, just sitting on the Mississippi / I'd settle for a shopping trolley in the Liffey / In a shot, I'd swap my body for a body of water” - Anything But (Hozier)

“Honey, I laugh when it sinks in / A pillar I am of pride / Scarcely can speak for my thinking / What you'd do to me tonight” - Dinner and Diatribes (Hozier)

“I'm untetherin' from the parts of me you'd recognize / From charmin' to alarmin' in seconds / I'll be bedridden, I'll let the pain metastasize / But that's mornin', I'll forget it / And the dial tone is all I have” - Dial Drunk (Noah Kahan)

“I knew that look dear / Eyes always seeking / Was there in someone / That dug long ago / So I will not ask you / Why you were creeping / In some sad way I already know” - Like Real People Do (Hozier)

“I can be an old tattoo / To remind me when I get bad news / That I do not exist to die / But live to die while saving you” - She Calls Me Back (Noah Kahan ft. Kacey Musgraves)

“Honey, you're familiar like my mirror years ago / Idealism sits in prison, chivalry fell on its sword / Innocence died screaming, honey, ask me I should know / I slithered here from Eden just to sit outside your door” - From Eden (Hozier)

“I hate the beach / But I stand in California with my toes in the sand / Use the sleeves of my sweater” - Sweater Weather (The Neighbourhood)

“You asked me why I wasn't sayin' a word / I'm namin' the stars in the sky after you / It was a work of art / That's the hardest part” - Your Needs, My Needs (Noah Kahan)

“You said my heart has changed and my soul has changed / And my heart, and my heart / That my life has changed, that this town had changed / And you had not” - Orange Juice (Noah Kahan)

“Now I know your name, but not who you are / It's all okay / There ain't a drop of bad blood, it's all my love” - All my Love (Noah Kahan)

“Everywhere, everything, I wanna love you / 'Til we're food for the worms to eat / 'Til our fingers decompose, keep my hands in yours” - Everywhere, Everything (Noah Kahan)

“It's all washin' over me, I'm angry again / The things that I lost here, the people I knew / They got me surrounded for a mile or two / The car's in reverse, I'm grippin' the wheel / I'm back between villages and everything's still” - The View Between Villages (Noah Kahan)

“The memory hurts / But does me no harm / Your hand in my pocket / To keep us both warm” - Abstract Psychopomp (Hozier)

“All the tales the same / Told before and told again / A soul that's born in cold and rain” - Sunlight (Hozier)

“The birds will still sing, your folks will still fight / The boards will still creak, the leaves will still die / We ain't angry at you, love / We'll be waitin' for you, love” - You’re Gonna Go Far (Noah Kahan)

“Now that it's done / There's not one thing that I would change / My life was a storm, since I was born / How could I fear any hurricane?” - Francesca (Hozier)

“Heaven is not fit to house a love / Like you and I” - Francesca (Hozier)

[goldenmusicmoments]

The Greatest Pop Star Of The 21st Century:

So Billboard decided to do a list of the greatest pop stars of the 21st century. They gradually revealed the list over quite a drawn out period. When they got to the top two the last two artists that had yet to be mentioned and were the obvious ones that were going to take one of the spots, were Taylor Swift and Beyoncé. Twitter in particular became a hotspot for discussions, were fans of both artists highlighted why the artist they backed deserves the number one spot. When Taylor Swift was finally revealed to be in the second position on the list, it was clear then that Beyoncé no doubt was going to take the top spot. Billboard just officially announced Beyoncé as the number one greatest pop star of the 21st century. However there since has been a huge breakdown on Twitter over it. With Taylor Swift fans shocked and surprised as to why she wasn’t the number one pick. As her chart accolades and commercial performance have very well been unmatched. It was then revealed that there was more to the criteria, that it also factored in impact beyond commercial success. 

The list is one compiled by staff members and based on their opinions. So there wasn’t truly a need for all the outrage and disarray the list has caused. Both Taylor Swift and Beyoncé are incredibly talented artists. Beyoncé being placed atop is well deserved no doubt. It is understandable that oft times fans want to see the artists they support come out on top and that they can end up feeling disappointed. Everyones opinion and assessment on what makes a pop star varies. Taylor Swift not being crowned number one doesn’t take away from any of her achievements or talent. But the mess that has since ensued on social media and then media publications jumping in on it now as well, has been rather twisted. The Beyhive have taken the opportunity to run with the hashtag #swiftieracism which seems like a desperate attempt to attack Taylor Swift, even now they seem to feel threatened to some extent. As the vast majority of the tweets they are associating to that hashtag aren’t even from Swifties. Even the ones with Taylor in their profile pictures aren’t actual fans, many are accounts that switched their profile pictures, updated their bios and tweaked their timelines to add fuel for their fellow Hive members to light up. 

We’ve seen this happen in the past with those that dislike Taylor Swift to pose as fans and tweet racist attacks. However when you are so desperate to propagate a certain stereotype that you’ve been using in relation to Taylor Swift’s fanbase, you fail to verify anything. When the hashtag began to take off, I was in disbelief that this really can’t be true to this extent. Yes you’ll always have a few bad seeds in every and any fanbase. I decided to look into these accounts, most of the people that were feeding into the hashtag were sharing screenshots of the tweets rather than quoting the actual poster. Which they thought would deter most from doing their due diligence. When looking at these accounts some of the ones with Taylor now their profile picture had been up till that moment retweeting and tweeting content that was against Taylor Swift, then you had a vast majority of Lana Del Rey fan accounts and then a bunch from other fanbases. Now we very well know that the Beyhive aren’t actually wanting to tackle racism, they just scour for a reason to tarnish Taylor Swift’s legacy. As they’ve always had some sort of animosity towards her. 

If they cared about racism and were honest in their intent then they’d also tackle its existence amongst their own cohort. The media has now also run with headlines about Swifties and said racist remarks, looks like they aren’t bothered to check for credibility when in pursuit of a catchy headline. The Beyhive continue to ignorantly run with stuff in relation to Taylor Swift and it is obvious what they hope to achieve in the end. Now you have bitter Charli XCX, Olivia Rodrigo or Billie Eilish fans stampeding over to scream ‘We stand with the Beyhive’. Any fan base that has seen their favourite artists lose when up against Taylor Swift have jumped on the opportunity to attack Taylor Swift. 

It has become such a tired tune they sing about Taylor Swift. That according to them she is mediocre, she has no talent and that she is only successful because of white privilege. Just because you struggle to comprehend or grasp what makes her standout to so many people and why she has the success that she has, doesn’t then mean she isn’t talented or successful. Of course white privilege has had a hand in making things easier for her to some degree, however it is her talent that has carried her this far.

Racism has no place anywhere and those that are posting these vile tweets need to understand that it is not acceptable. There is no excuse that could ever validate racist remarks. Also the Hive should have been celebrating, however instead they took attention away from Beyoncé’s big moment and made it about Taylor Swift and her fans. The article that was meant to be in celebration of Beyoncé’s crowning ended up trying to explain their reasoning and also brought up Taylor Swift a hefty amount of times. Which shouldn’t have been the case, it should have solely been focused on all of Beyoncé’s achievements and the impact she has, that has brought her to this point. 

[peraya-clownery]

One of my current frustrations is to create a photocard case for my idols, and it was based on one of my Pe(ray)achtober 2023 entries, which involved bread, pink and green hearts*, lion (Prachaya Ruangroj; his nickname is a Thai word for the said animal), turtle ("Krist" Perawat Sangpotirat's representative animal), and the pangasius fish (that is, according to the Peraya-folk, is the representative animal for the couple fans).

I'm very happy to say that Singto had a grand comeback at the GMM Grammy last 15 February 2024 (to quote from Praybeyt Benjamin, "WELCOME HOME POPSIEEEEEEEEE!!!"), and in order to hype things up for the impending comeback with Krist (fingers crossed!!!), the fans made the #WelcomeSingtoBackToKrist hashtag trend. And, did I even mention that today is the seventh Peraya-versary?!? WHAT A TIME TO BE ALIVE!!! :D

—Cloudy of the Tortured Peraya Department, 2024-04-19. (Not to mention, today is the release of Taylor Swift's latest album, The Tortured Poets Department.)

*pink for Singto, green for Krist. in addition to that, red is the color of the Peraya fandom, based off from the hazers' uniform in SOTUS the Series. and yes, here's to the user face reveal for the second time, proving that the user behind the blog is human :P

[crudetautology]

So Guy, Paul and their sister Maria Williams did an interview in 2017, before TM NZ, with Guy and Paul in a room and Maria through speakerphone (Paul is also apparently playing with a yo-yo during the interview) and I really wanted to post some quotes from it but I ended up just copypasting half of the article to be honest, so I put it under keep reading, but here's a taste: - Maria thinks that Guy stole her personality (yes, really) - "BURN IN HELL PAUL!" - Paul tries to interject in a discussion Guy and Maria are having and the interviewer transcribes it thusly: Paul: [Something that cannot be heard underneath his older siblings]

Guy: So what’s the angle of the article? ‘How did a comedy dynasty come to be?’ Maria has a very interesting theory, don’t you Maria? Can you hear us Maria?

Maria: I can hear you a little bit. What did you just say?

Guy: I was saying Maria has an interesting theory that I stole her personality.

Maria: This is a hundred percent true. All of a sudden, Guy started loving these things he hated. For example, Taylor Swift, who I don’t love any more but I did at the time as like a 19 year old girl. And musicals, for example Wicked. Our whole family went to Wicked and I cried like a baby and our whole family meets afterwards and Guy thought it was lame and dumb…

Guy: I enjoyed Wicked.

Maria: …and now he’s the biggest fan of Wicked.

Guy: This is an unfair allegation! Can I say, I enjoyed Wicked and enjoyed the whole experience of going to Wicked in Melbourne. I remember it fondly.

Maria: I remember you not liking it fondly and I remember thinking–

Guy: Paul can be the tie-breaker. Do you remember my enjoyment level of Wicked?

Paul: Don’t remember it. I loved the show and I had a great night.

Maria: Also, Guy was also quite a grumpy person.

Guy: Yeah and I’m…

Maria: And he was always quite loud and quite grumpy…

Guy: Isn’t that my comedy persona though?

Maria: And so then what happened, he was quite grumpy and didn’t talk to people and suddenly he was a really nice person and was charismatic and talked to everyone, so people started being like ‘Oh Maria! You’re charismatic and you talk to everyone, when did your brother become you?’

Guy: So Maria, are you suggesting that my comedy career was based on my stealing your personality?

Maria: Yes, that’s exactly what I’m saying. You ripped off my personality.

Paul: Can I just compare this to the rapper Rick Ross…

Guy: She’s saying I ripped off her personality.

Paul: Rick Ross did it. His real name’s not Rick Ross.

Maria: I’m not the only… I’m not the only person who thinks this, like, friends of mine who you used to not talk to, Mum thinks this…

Paul: Rick Ross…

Maria: …extended family members think this…

Guy: Maria’s got evidence. See this is quite a tense situation though, because I think I’ve been reasonably successful as a comedian and the best known of the three of us so far and it’s horrible to hear that I’ve done this by pushing my sister, my only sister, down. It’s evil!

Paul: Rick Ross worked as a prison guard and then there was a criminal called Ricky Ross or something and he stole his name and persona.

Interviewer: So you guys are the Rick Ross of New Zealand comedy.

Maria: So I don’t mean specifics to your stand-up because obviously my stand-up is of a higher quality-

Guy: Oh ho! Shots fired early on!

Maria: I mean like, your TV personality generally, like the stuff..

Guy: Definitely not my TV personality but maybe what I did on The Edge.

Maria: Can I just say, so far this has been exactly how I expected this to be: me and Guy yelling over the top of each other and not even being sure if Paul’s in the room.

Guy: Paul’s been talking it’s just you can’t hear him.

Maria: Oh OK. So Paul’s there? [...]

Paul: [Something that cannot be heard underneath his older siblings]

[...]

Maria: I got the family into the Nelson Youth Theatre Company, or NYTC as we so affectionately call it.

Paul: Well, Mum…

[...]

Guy: Why is this so long? I’ll summarise this for you…

Paul: She danced to ‘Rock DJ’ by Robbie Williams.

Guy: And it killed. It killed. It was hilarious. It was gold and it was the start. It lit a fire!

Maria: Guy! I just want to finish my sentence! It’s not difficult! [...]

Guy: So as you can tell, and I think this is the same with any comedy, is that it kind of like verges on reality. And like, as you can tell with this argument where you can’t tell if me and Maria are joke-arguing or real-arguing, that’s where the comedy comes from a little bit.

Maria: I’m one hundred percent real-arguing!

Guy: Okay, sure. My point was going to be that one of our most legendary family comedy moments was a famous moment when we were downstairs in a room similar to this in Nelson and Maria was watching TV– Maria what TV show were you watching?

Maria: I don’t remember.

Guy: She was watching Full House or one of her shows.

Maria: It was probably like Ugly Betty…

Guy: Paul, you tell the story.

Paul: So she was watching a TV show, can’t remember…

Guy: Probably Full House or ‘Olsen Twins’ (Editor’s Note: Olsen Twins is not, and has never been, a show.)

Maria: No!

Paul: …and I wanted to play XBox on the downstairs TV so I said, ‘When can I go on the TV?’ and she was like, ‘This show finishes at 6’ or whatever. I come down at 6 and she’s watching the next show that’s just started and I’m like, ‘Can I go on now?’ She was like, ‘Oh but this is…’

Guy: She was addicted to TV! She was like, ‘The Olsen twins are on now I can’t get off the TV!’

Paul: So I only had one choice – I’m not proud of it, but I snitched. Obviously now I have a no-snitch mentality but at the time the no-snitch policy wasn’t in play yet and so I went and told Mum. Mum came down and was like, ‘Maria you’ve got to give the TV to Paul now.’ Maria burst into tears, went halfway up the staircase, turned around and went, ‘BURN IN HELL PAUL! BURN IN HELL’ and then went up to her room.

Guy: Now this is something that Maria remembers fondly as a story that we would bring up at every family gathering, party, the time Maria told Paul to burn in hell because she had to stop watching Full House on television.

Maria: No! No! That is completely inaccurate. OK. I just remember… I don’t think it escalated that quickly–

Guy: It went from zero to 100 pretty quick. My point being is that when Maria–

Maria: No shut up! Let me talk! I was trying to insult Paul in a way, without swearing… and being the meanest insult of all time, and having gone to Catholic school, ‘burn in hell’ was the best I could come up with.

Maria: I did not bring this up at parties–

Guy: No, we did–

Maria: It started to come up because Guy kept bringing it up–

Guy: Yeah, and I’m still bringing it up, like twenty years later… OK my point was going to be that I’ve used the catchphrase ‘burn in hell’ throughout my career ‘cause it’s so valuable, like, ‘cause it’s really hard to insult people without swearing, as she just said, and it’s really hard to really show anger without having good acting skills or swearing which are two things I don’t have so I’ve used ‘burn in hell’ all the time and taken that psychotic aspect of Maria that day and used it, like if you’ve seen anything I’ve done on TV, that’s why I’m aware that Maria’s saying she thinks she influenced my TV career, like, that psychotic character that’s like ‘GET THE HELL OUT OF MY SHOP! BURN IN HELL! GET OUTTA HERE’ like I do that all the time and it’s based… it’s inspired by Maria–

Maria: I know! It’s just further proof that Guy has just ripped off–

Guy: That’s what I was saying! You’re the inspiration! So Maria’s obviously a huge comedy influence on the family. 

[...]

Guy: I was doing a bleak gig on like a Thursday night, and I’m embarrassed to say I did this hack joke, but um, someone spilled a glass and the classic hack comedy response which I did that night ‘cause I was desperate is ‘Uh oh! Dad’s home!’ and uh, turns out it was actually my dad.

My dad was in the audience. So I was still doing this gag and he was like ‘Yeah, Dad is home.’ And I was like ‘Dad, you’re drunk, go home.’ Like that’s normally the response, like ‘Dad, you’re drunk, go home.’ And, uh, it was my dad.

Later he said he was trying to help out with the show by heckling and and I go, ‘What are you doing at the gig, Gary?!’ And he’s like, ‘Your mum kicked me outta the house!’ and that got the biggest laugh of the night.

[glorious-poetato]

[Singing]

Tommyinnit x reader

Warnings: none (tell me if there is one please)

Summary: (this is based off his Singing stream.) Tommyinnit invites his s/o to his Singing stream. Also y/n is a swifte and can play guitar deal with it.(:

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_

          I looked over at my phone to see a message from tommy.

Tommy<3: I'm doing a singing stream and would love for you to join me. Also if you would like bring you guitar

  

I quickly respond saying that I would love to and I'm on my way with my guitar. I call an uber for a ride to Tommy's apartment. I knock on the door waiting for tommy to answer. He opens the door and tells me " jack is here too we are planning to do a skit were he's like my manager kind of thing." As we enter his office I see jack and say a quick hello. Jack then blurts out "Oh tommy you and y/n can be a duo act. Then are skit will still work." Tommy looks over at me asking if that's alright. "I'm good with that" I say. "Oh but I do have a condition we have to sing a taylor swift song." I add "deal" Tommy quickly replied as we shook on it. After that they finish up prepping the stream.

He then greets the chat talking about his hidden music abilities and how he needed a manager. He then introduces jack as cleft and "cleft" tells tommy he won't be able to make it on his own and that he found him a partner. Thats when I step on screen and immediately chat fills up will y/nnn. After that I sit down and I grab my guitar. Me and tommy begin singing a song together but "cleft" kept making jokes that we would choke back laughter at. This cycle repeats for a bit till the curtain drops and I'm told to entertain chat. I whisper to chat and ask if I should sing a taylor swift song. I see the chat spam yes or no but decided it mostly yes so I beging Singing love story while playing the guitar. Clift then turns to tommy and says "take notes right there is a star." Chat starts saying yes y/n is way better and tommy is like you guys are supposed to be on my side. I'm a big man I'm obviously the best. A little bit goes buy tommy talking about the quote book I have a proud smile on my face as he announces it chat seems to notice but that's fine I really was proud of the fact him and wilbur made a whole book. After that we go back to singing and soon the stream ends.

Once the cameras fully shut off tommy looked over at me and said "holy crap I forgot how good of a singer you are." This made me blush but a I managed to replie with a small thankyou and saying that he is also an amazing singer. While we were having that little jack was recording unbeknownst to us. he then sent it to will saying look how sweet their being to eachother.

The end

(Sorry for any Grammer and spelling mistakes)

-poe<3                                          

[that-crazy-five-foot-two-chick]

It's been so funny and interesting to me getting into Taylor Swift after already having long been into Stray Kids and kpop in general, so here are some funny parallels I've noticed between the two and/or their fandoms:

Ryan Reynolds

The Vault/Chan's Laptop

Really dumb fun fandom energy. Like please, I did not expect the ship name Toe, but that is the only one I am using now. Please I am begging Stays to have this energy when skz start dating publicly

Videos appreciating them existing in cute

Taylor's cats 🤝 Minho's cats

Frothing at the mouth over good/cathartic lyrics and the analysis of such

Ed Sheeran appreciation

Being serious derps irl/online with fans

Loving how their hearts and minds work and how they convey the contents of the same

Reluctant song ranking tiktoks

Knowing exactly which era a photo was from solely based on hair and/or clothes

Knowing details about them that would sound really creepy to someone outside the fandom it's not creepy if they say it in an interview or behind the scenes I swear

TOO MANY SIGNIFICANT NUMBERS and on that note, lowkey wanna leave the list here solely for the sake of things

Learning vocabulary because of them. Seriously. Why did it take me until the last month to figure out that Miroh meant maze and that Clé means key when I've been stanning them since 2021. I'm so mad.

Songs instead of therapy but please go to therapy if you legit need it. "this is me trying" was not about using lyrics as a replacement for professional help. That's a Placebo.

"yes they can actually sing live and here's the proof"

Very involved in their songs from start to finish and it shows and we love them for it

OH SHOOT—I just realized Taylor's Versions vs SKZ 2020/2021—

ME! lol. I do mean the song but also technically me myself as well now heh

Writing love/breakup songs except it's completely made up

Extremely prolific

"so I made this song at stupid o'clock in the morning and here it is lol" and it's the freaking sparkly cd meme

We CARE care about album drops and about them making the money off of it that they deserve as artists

Wanting merch but wiping the lint off the bottom of our wallets to try to find the money

"Please let one measly concert seat be available even if it sucks"

"wait a second, they/their fandoms AREN'T hysterical like the media paints them to be?" *insert mental hurricane that eventually dies down here* "wait, am I actually considering joining them??" *narrator voice: but by then, it was already too late*

Seeing the same memes/edits but in different fandoms but it's not memes I've seen in non-music fandoms. Like literally. Just watched one.

Acronyms that look like keyboard smashes to everyone else please though Swifties you're way worse please have mercy on this baby I'm still learning—

Recycling quotes from haters into song lyrics, like please yes queen/king, continue, go off

Giant creepy creatures as tour set pieces

Taylor and Chan being parents even though they have never actually had children

And on that note, knowing everybody in their industries

Rolling out our list of reasons like a scroll every time we say we stan them and the other person so much as inhales to start a response. We could probably recite that list in our sleep at this point.

Stay Stay Stay HAHAHAHAHAHA

I seriously need to shut up or I will get nothing done today but yeah if you stan one, please give the other a chance because you're doing yourself a disservice if you don't.

[midnightswithdearkatytspb]

VelvetCardiganBucky’s Recommendations 2021: Week 1 & 2 | January 1-9

Welcome to my first ever list of recommendations! In this week's list, you’ll find links to my favorite stories I've read in the past week. Eventually, I would like to also share some of my other favorite things on this site, but for now, it's just stories. If you would like your story featured in a future post just use #ktkvcbreadinglist

Be aware most of the stories and writers on this list are 18+ over writers and my blog is an 18+ blog.

Week 3 »

Chris Evans

Sealed with an Accident by @coolemmasulivan • Chris Evans x Reader — Fluffy and sweet, we need it after the week we just had.

Steve Rogers

Fill Me Up by @jtargaryen18 • Steve Rogers x Reader — Sweet, but hot.

Ransom Drysdale

The Highest Bidder by pagesoflauren • Ransom Drysdale x Reader – Graduate school is expensive, especially when you’ve moved out of state and going to school in Boston. Bills pile up, and soon your bank account is looking grim, with no choice left but to auction off what you deem your most valuable asset: your virginity. | Sequel: Money’s Worth

her cherry lips on his whiskey flavoured kiss by @cloudystevie • Love Drunk Ransom x Reader – Ransom was never a one for till he met you. (The smut in this is just beautiful.)

Andy Barber

Blackmail by @stargazingfangirl18 • Darkish!Andy Barber x Reader – Mob!Andy Barber? YES, please! I didn't know I was missing out till I was reading this. The writing is great and it leaves you wanting more. Kudos to the writer and thank you for the filthy smut.

Bucky Barnes

Golden by @rebeccccccaaa • King!Bucky x Knight!Reader – King Bucky loses his wife after she falls sick, his kingdom demands he remarries, preferably to a nearby kingdom to form an alliance. The problem is the isn't the one, but her knight, however, well she was a pleasant surprise for the King.

'Tis The Damn Season by @sweeterthanthis & @msmarvelwrites • Bucky Barnes x Reader – Angst/Smut/Man Whore Bucky and Taylor Swift what more could I ask for? There is now Taylor Swift in this, it’s just named after the song but it’s just as angsty as the song and perfect. *EDIT: Before I just had Lau as the writer, but Brontë was a co-writer on it and it makes me enjoy it even more!*

Rule Number Four by @buckyswinterbaby • softdom!Bucky Barnes x Reader – Can I just say this is just perfect? Like if I had to picture Bucky as a dom, this is how I would see him. Also, this one-shot isn't too graphic, so if you are looking for a little something but nothing too heavy this is the one for you.

Exile by @sweeterthanthis • Bucky Barnes x Reader – Get yourself some tissues, because I needed them, but again this last week had my hormones on haywire. But don’t say I didn’t warn you. Lau uses Grey's Anatomy quotes in this and of course, it’s based on Taylor Swift's song Exile so it’s got some Major Angst, this isn’t a happy one-shot but it does have smut. I love it so much. Thank you for blessing us with your creativity Lau!

Alcoholic Juice Box by @ayybtch • Bucky x Reader – Best Boyfriend ever meets adulting sucks significant other, but he’ll do whatever he can to make them happy.

Cold Body by @sergeant-bonky • Bucky x Reader – Pure Fluff and cuddles, everything I needed after last week.

Santa Baby by @shield-agent78 • Bucky x Darcy Lewis Friends/Bucky x Reader – Steve needs some super-soldier Advil to put up with Bucky but knows Darcy can help him! This is just so fluffy and perfect! I ship Bucky and Darcy but also seeing them as friends is great!

Cookie Monster by @bugsbucky • Dad!Bucky & Daughter – STRAIGHT UP FLUFF THAT FEEDS YOUR SOUL

Stucky

Secrets by @darkficsyouneveraskedfor • Dark!Bucky Barnes x Reader x Dark! King Steve Rogers – A buried family secret comes to light thrusting you to the forefront of an old alliance. (Sorry there is no Masterlist and I know Roo has 7 Chapters as of right now.)

The Concubine by cherinenymphe • DARK!Stucky x Concubine!Reader — Reader is favorite Concubine of the King Steve Rogers, and when he joins forces with King James Barnes, she soon finds herself the favorite of both kings. How long can reader satisfy the kings before jealousy arises risking both kingdoms alliances?

Not Red Riding Hood by @angrythingstarlight • A/B/O Dynamics Dark Stucky x Reader – Sometimes you just need to read about some wolfs chasing after you to claim and what do you know it’s good in a dark sort of way. *winks*

Misc.

This Mission by @quietmyfearswith • Captain Syverson x Stucky x Reader – Is it getting hot in here? Because I sure needed to be doused in a bucket of ice water after reading this! It’s got EVERYTHING!

treat you well | stackie by @sexyxseabassx • Stackie x Reader – SMUT/Threesome ~ I didn't know I needed Anthony Mackie, Sebastian Stan, and Reader inserts in my life or anything of the sorts really till I read this, and I loved it. All I can say is that I hope Shreya brings us more. Thank you for blessing us with this one-shot.

Writers

@pagesoflauren – Let me tell you about my friend Lauren... Lauren is a fantastic writer, she is always blowing me away with her talents. I’m also in awe of how she always makes time to give us chapters even though she has a hectic life schedule. If you take the time to read Lauren’s writing I promise you won't be let down, it's some of the most amazing pieces I’ve ever read. She's constantly coming up with new stuff.

@sweeterthanthis – I binged Lau’s masterlist and let me just say, they are are a freaking amazing writer. Lau made me cry, laugh, and get angry with the reader inserts! Lau’s talents know no bounds. I look forward to see what 2021 has in store for Lau.

@literate-lamb – I binged their small yet so good masterlist as well. They are a really good writer of dark!fics and they have a way of pulling you in and making you feel as if you are in it.

@cherienymphe – Don’t know how I slept so long on her blog, but her writing is dark and beautiful. It sends chills down your spine and it also makes you weep for the characters. Truly beautiful! *chefs kiss*

[spidernerdsblog]

Wildest Dreams

Pairing: actor! Tom Holland x actress! Reader

Summary : Based on Taylor Swift’s song Wildest dreams. You thought Tom was the love of your life but it was just one of your wildest dreams.

Warnings : 18+,SMUT, mature content, infidelity, angst, tom being a douchebag.

"Today we have with us the Oscar winning renowned actress the one and only Y/N Y/L/N!" The RJ hyped you up. 

"Hello everyone" you spoke on the mic in front of you smiling. 

"Well first of all congratulations Y/N on your big oscar win." 

"Thank you so much. I’m still recovering from it not gonna lie." You chuckle. The RJ asked you a bunch of other questions which you replied cheerfully. 

"So you have been casted to play Morgan Stark in the next part of Marvel Avengers movie." 

"Yes and I am looking forward to it. Being in a Marvel film was always on my wishlist and I can finally tick it off." 

"Do you feel yourself under pressure as you will be continuing a legacy?" 

"It’s definitely a pressure playing Tony Stark’s daughter and living upto the standards of none other than RDJ. Luckily he is personally mentoring me and I think I’ll fare well. I have read the script which I can't reveal much but playing the grown up version of Morgan who is a part of the Avengers will be a lot of fun." 

"Well saying so you are also going to be sharing screen with Tom Holland after a long time. What do you have to say about the rumours  of you being speculated as the possible reason behind his relationship with his fiancee hitting the rocks?" you took a moment before answering the question. 

"Well a lot of things fly in the air we don't catch on everything right? And I have always made it clear that we never dated, we are just friends that's all."

"So you are still single?" 

"And not interested to mingle." You chuckle. 

"Well it was nice to have you with us today, Y/N."

"It was my pleasure. Love you guys bye."

The show ended and you headed out of the office building for the pre production meeting arranged by Marvel with the whole cast. You were sitting in your posh car, the last question of the RJ about your relationship with Tom still spiraling in your mind. You reminisced about one of your past mistakes. Though you wouldn't call it a mistake because you fell for a wrong person but when he left he gave you a life lesson which you will remember in your lifetime that 'nothing lasts forever'. 

It started with a small Instagram follow but who knew it would take you down like that. 

It all happened 2 years ago in a promotional show just like this. Your acting career had just begun and you had managed to create quite a buzz in and around the industry delivering two blockbusters mesmerizing the critics and audiences with your spectacular performance in your three year acting career. You were in a radio show for the promotion of your upcoming movie. The RJs were interviewing you.

"Well Tom Holland was here the other day and we asked who he likes among the upcoming new talents in the industry. He said and we quote that you are cute, sexy and very talented." the lady said. 

"Well what do I say thank you Tom." you giggle shyly. 

"Have you guys ever met?" the other male RJ asked. 

"Not really, though we had a chance to interact during the comic con. But I really admire his work and would love to work with him in future."

"But I have to inform you that he is a little disappointed that he follows you but you never followed him back." the lady jokes. 

"Well I can fix that I guess.'' You took out your phone from your jeans pocket and opened your insta app.

"And here we go, officially following Tom Holland." You said tapping the follow button.

"I hope now you are not upset anymore, Tom." you chuckle.

In less than a month you were signed up for a Netflix movie. It was a rom com and you were casted opposite none other than Tom Holland. The shooting began within two months.

You were on the set sitting in your trailer facetiming your mom. 

"Honey are you eating well?" Your mom asked.

"Yes mom I am." You assured her when you heard a knock as the door of your trailer opened and the person’s head popped in, it was Tom. You waved your hand to usher him in. 

"Five minutes please." You mouthed to him

"It’s okay," he mouthed back sitting on a chair. 

"Who is it?" Your mom asked.

"It's my costar you know him, the guy from spiderman." You inform her.

"Oh the one you have a crush on?" 

"Mom!" You shrieked utterly embarrassed with your mom revealing your secret.

"What? You only said that he is cute." 

"Ok-ok I get it you made your point but I have to go now, I'll talk to you later."

"OK sweetie take care." 

"Yeah bye mom." You ended the call heaving a sigh of relief and turned towards him. 

"Ignore my mom. I just told her that you were cute in the homecoming movie and she just assumed I have a crush on you." 

"Oh that's fine." He gave you a warm smile.

"So what's up?" You chirped.

"Umm just here to talk about the scenes we are going to shoot tomorrow together."

"Oh you mean the sex scenes?"

"Umm yeah." He said uneasiness clearly in his voice.

"Tom Holland nervous about some sex scenes?" You joked.

"No-no it's, it's not like that. I just want to make sure that you are comfortable tomorrow so I just wanted to discuss it beforehand."

"Oh that's really nice of you. Well honestly I'm always nervous before such scenes. Though it's partial nudity but still the scenes are quite passionate and vividly described." 

"Don't worry I'll try my best to make it easy and comfortable for you."

"Thank you Tom."

"Pleasure is all mine." he smiled. 

The next day on the set the director gave you the last minute reading of the scene that you are going to shoot. You and Tom walked in the frame. As per the script you guys play characters who are friends with benefits but both of you grow feelings for each other. When one confronts the other it leads to an angsty moment but soon turns into passionate love making. 

The camera started rolling and as soon as the director said "action!". You both got into your characters and played your parts flawlessly as per the script. 

"Why don’t you find someone who doesn’t hurt you?" You ask

"But I love you, Emma." Tom replies with a soft tone.

"Liam you don’t understand I was never good at this." You say with frustration in your voice.

"What.. talking?" He sarcasms.

"Yeah talking, communicating, relationships.." You were cut off as he captured your lips for a kiss.

"Well neither was I but we can figure it out slowly." his gaze was intense as your eyes were glassy. 

The next thing you did was, crashed your lips to his. It had to be a very messy sloppy one so both of you rolled your tongues into each other’s mouth. You popped open the buttons of his shirt out of desperation and then pushed him onto the bed. Tom plopped on the soft mattress as you got up to straddle him around his waist pulling your sweatshirt off your body revealing your red lacy bra underneath. Tom let out a light gasp it wasn’t to happen but the whole act turned him on as he felt blood rushing down south. You carried on the act like a true professional and leaned on to his face capturing his thin lips. He deepened the kiss holding your face and you kept on grinding on his crotch. The kiss grew heavy then you were suddenly aware of the growing bulge underneath you but you continued anyhow 'he is a human getting aroused is normal' you kept on repeating that in your mind. His hand trailed up your back and unclasped your bra. 

And with the scene coming to an end the director shouted "cut!" 

"Well done you guys." The director praised. You pulled away and got off him as the costume runner handed you your robe to cover you up, you slipped it on and tied it around your body. 

Tom's eyes never left you as you made your way back to your trailer to retouch your makeup and take a rest before the next scene starts. He was always known to be a professional but you made his mind go haywire. You on the other hand could only think about the scene, how you felt his hard on though it wasn't his fault it happens sometimes you reminded yourself. 

After the unit packed up for the day you were on your way back to your car as you heard a car honking behind you. You stopped as the car pulled over and the windows rolled down. 

"Need a ride?" Tom asked sweetly. 

"No thanks, I have my own." You gave a tight lipped smile.

"C'mon it's been a hectic week for both of us we should really blow off some steam and I don't want to get drunk alone too."

"Okay." You gave in breaking into a smile. You sat in the front seat as he drove the car while you texted your manager Mike about your change of plans. 

"So where are we going?" you ask. 

"Just in and about the town.'' everything went silent again before Tom cleared his throat and began. 

"Umm listen Y/N I'm.."

"It's okay Tom it happens sometimes I didn't mind anything." You cut him off saving him and you from  the awkward conversation. He took you to a local pub and had a few drinks together. Later you got back into the car both of you totally buzzed. You were laughing about something as Tom kept staring at you. 

"What?" you ask giggling. What came into his mind you don't know as he just straight up went to grab your face and kissed you, catching you off guard. You pushed him away, bewildered. 

"Tom! What are you doing?!" 

"Sorry, sorry, I-I just couldn't control myself. Ever since I saw you like that you are the only thing in my mind." he rambled. 

"But that doesn't mean you can kiss me."

"Don't tell me you didn't like it." his voice low as he brought his hand to your cheek. 

"Well.." Your words were stuck in your throat as your gaze dropped to his lips and you leaned forward to kiss him again fervently. 

"Your place or mine?" He asked, pulling away gasping. 

"Whichever is close." You said out of breath.

He never drove his car this fast the way he drove tonight to reach his apartment rented by the production company for him. You weren't even completely inside his apartment as he crashed his lips and pushed you against the door. You moaned into the kiss as he picked you up and carried you to his bedroom. 

You woke up the next morning as the sunlight hit your face squinting your eyes open. You stir on the bed to find yourself tangled in bedsheets and in the arms of Tom.

"Goodmorning, love." His voice husky as he looks down at you with his soft brown eyes. You sit up abruptly holding the sheets to your chest wide eyed as you recollect the memories of last night. Mike your manager had always warned you that you should avoid getting into any kind of relationship with your costars. You are young and new to this industry, a good image is what you need right now. 

"No, no, no this was a mistake. This should have never happened." You repent holding your head. Tom sits up holding your shoulders comfortingly. 

"Hey-Hey it’s okay. Last night was really good.I understand you don't know me well and your career has just begun so you don't want a relationship but that doesn't mean we can't have a little bit of fun." saying so he went for a kiss but you pull away.

"That's not the point Tom! We are colleagues and I want to keep it that way. And this will never happen again. This will be the first and last." You made it clear and left his apartment.

🥀

However Tom made it a mission to tease the hell out of you on set. You would often find him subtly touching you whenever he got the chance, when you were sitting together his fingers lazily dancing around your thighs making you shiver as he flashed you a cocky grin because he is totally aware of what he is doing to you. 

You reached your breaking point on the day you had to shoot another sex scene. The scene required minimal clothing. You would be just wearing your underwear and modesty patches to cover your breasts which will leave little to anyone's imagination. You took off your robe and lied down on the bed underneath the white covers Tom got on top of you in just his boxers. You licked your lips as you saw the prominent outline of his dick through the fabric which only reminded you of the night you slept together. He propped over you on his forearms a pillow kept between you. 

As the director shouted 'action', Tom leaned down to kiss you, dragging his lips down your body, sucking on to your skin as he massaged your breast with his hand. He could feel your nipple harden through the patch as you began to let out small moans as per the script. The heat radiating from his body was so overwhelming you could just think of him railing you to the mattress. Heat pooled between your legs and you were thankful that there is a pillow separating you or else he would easily get to know how wet you are. 

You closed your eyes, hands slipping on to his back letting out fake moans as he carried on rutting his hips on the pillow. Suddenly a chill ran down your spine when you felt two slender fingers brushing near your heat. 

"Did I make you wet, darling?" he whispered, chuckling lowly into your ears. Your breath hitched as you felt your cheeks heat up but you had nothing much to do than just go on with the scene. 

The scene ended as soon as the director said "cut!" And you were more than thankful as you quickly slipped into the robe. But you were hot and bothered as you exchanged glances as you both agreed to an unspoken agreement. 

And a few agonising moments later you find yourself bent down gazing at your flushed out reflection with droopy eyes in the dirty mirror of one of the restrooms on set you both snuck into to relieve your sexual frustration. Your dress bunched up to your waist as Tom thrusted inside you hard and fast. 

"Fuck darling! This feels so better when I actually get to fuck this pretty little pussy instead of wasting my energy humping a damn pillow." He grunted drawing back his hip to slam right into you as you jolted forward trying to keep yourself steady gripping on the edge of the marble.

"Fuck Tom!" you moaned. Your legs felt wobbly; knees on the verge of giving out as Tom’s hands expertly supported you. One of his hands slipped between your thighs rubbing circles stimulating your sensitive bud. You gasped at the added pleasure. 

"Tell me sweetheart who is fucking you so well?" He asked cockily.

"You T-Tom you." you were finding it hard to form proper words.

"Damn right." he chuckles. 

Just then there was a knock on the door. You squeaked in surprise and Tom immediately covered your mouth with his hand. You glared at him through the mirror.

"Miss Y/L/N?" It was your assistant Rebecca. Tom removed his hand from your mouth still going on with his menacing pace.

"What the fuck?!!" You seethed.

"You were being loud." he Whisper yells. 

"Mam are you there?" She asked again.

"Yeah- yeah. What is it?" You stuttered.

"The next shot will be ready in half an hour. You need to go for your makeup." 

"Okay .. ah i’ll be there in a few minutes." You tried to answer as energetically as possible.

"Mam are you okay?" she asked with concern in her voice. 

"Yeah, yeah I’m fine. Just-just go I’ll be there." Tom had a smug grin plastered on his face. You rolled your eyes. His eyes darkened dripping with lust as he thrusted deep inside you again, hitting your spot as you moaned loudly but he pulled you back by your neck, capturing your lips messily muffling your moans. You felt him twitch inside you and you knew you weren’t far away. You heard Rebecca's receding footsteps as Tom increased his pace again tipping you off the edge you both came with a loud moan. His head dropped to the crook of your neck panting, brushing his lips on your sensitive skin. You hissed when he pulled out. He stepped away giving you some space to clean up while he chugged the condom in the bin and zipped his pants fixing his shirt.

"I’ll go out first and you come out later." He said running his fingers through his messy hair trying to tame them. You nodded trying your best to fix your dishevelled appearance. 

🥀

This just became a regular thing for you guys sneaking out on the set to end up making out at the most odd places you could ever imagine. Sometimes in your trailers for a quickie. 

One time you were making out at the back of your trailer Tom’s hands were roaming around all over your body as he blurted out of nowhere.

"I love you." You broke the kiss and raised a brow.

"You don’t need to show your fake love to get into my pants." Tom frowned. 

"What? No I do love you Y/N" 

"You’re joking right?" you gave a poker face. 

"No Y/N, ever since I met you I fell for you instantly." 

"Really?" Your eyes welled up in disbelief.

"Yes, love. I love you and will always love you." 

"I love you too." You sealed your lips kissing softly, emotions running high. 

You started to feel his presence even more around you after you confessed your feelings for each other. Your wardrobe now consists of half of his clothes which he leaves behind in your room every time he spends the night with you. He tells you he loves you but he is never there the next morning for you. He isn't ready to acknowledge the relationship between you because he says it isn't a good time. You are always dodging the prying eyes of the media. 

Yes you were young, naive and trusted people way too easily that is why you didn't see the obvious red flags in your relationship. 

🥀

The last scene for the movie was to be shot outdoors near a cliff. The location was picturesque as the last scene was shot of you and Tom kissing each other. After the shooting ended the director officially announced the wrapping up of the film. The crew hugged each other and indulged into a little celebration at the location itself. You went near the cliff soaking in the natural beauty reminiscing about how this was the best summer of your life where you found the love of your life when Tom walked up to you from behind. He brushed aside your hair placing a necklace with a heart shaped pendant around your neck. You let out a light gasp surprised heart swelling up at his loving gesture. 

"This-this is beautiful Tom." 

"I know, love. Only for the most beautiful woman. This will always remind you of our love."

He wrapped his arms around you as you overlooked the cliff watching the sunset with an orangish yellow hue. His phone buzzed as he took it out from his pocket and saw the caller id. 

"I need to take this." He excused himself to take the call. You fiddled with your necklace admiring it and smiling to yourself. One of the runners brought you a bottle of beer you took it and the boy was about to go and give the other bottle to Tom but you stopped him. 

"I’ll give it to him." You took the bottle from him and made your way where Tom was busy talking to whoever called over the phone. 

"Yeah bye love you. Miss you too." You caught the last bit of his conversation. 

"Girlfriend?" You joked startling him. For a moment he felt his breath caught in his throat, he gulped hard before chuckling nervously. 

"I’ll be so damned to cheat on you. It was my cousin. Have to go back home, some urgent family work has come up." 

"You will leave tomorrow only?" You pout.

"Sorry love." He brings his hand to your cheek.

"What about I go with you? I always wanted to meet your family, I mean my future family." Your eyes sparkled. 

"Uh i don’t think that’s  a good idea since we are not public yet." he fumbled. 

"So let’s go public. You love me, I love you, what's the problem?" 

"Ofcourse, love but not this time. Once I return from London we will make our relationship official I promise." 

"What if you find a hot brit chick and forget about me?" you pout. 

"I can never forget you. This face is worth remembering." he cradled your face lovingly. 

"I really want to spend the last few moments with you before I go back."

"I'll keep my door unlocked.'' You winked.

At night Tom stood in front of your hotel room and as you had said the door was unlocked he smiled to himself sneaking into your room quietly. He was startled as you grabbed him by his shirt and pulled him in pinning him against the door pressing your lips to his. 

"I’m gonna miss you so much." you say breathing heavily.

"Me too darling." 

Pretty soon all your clothes were discarded as you now lay on your bed spread out for him while he pounds into you relentlessly. 

"Oh fuck darling you always feel so good around me." He praises thrusting deeper inside you. You grab onto his back wrapping your legs around him. His phone buzzes several times on the bedside table but he was too invested in the pleasure he was getting being buried deep inside you so he decides to ignore it. 

"So gorgeous." He purrs trailing his lips down your chest sucking on to your hardened nipples. Your body arches at his touch, your one hand reaching  down to rub your clit.

"Yes rub that clit for me." He demands. You clench hard around him as you both reach your own highs. He collapsed on top of you burying his head in the crook of your neck as he pressed a soft kiss on your shoulder before pulling out and rolled over to your side. You turned to him resting your head on his chest. His phone buzzes again and he reaches to receive it but ends the call abruptly seeing the number. 

"Who is it?" 

"Oh it's no one, darling." He said, stroking your hair gently and pecking on your forehead wrapping you in his warm embrace. You nuzzle your face in his chest listening to his heartbeat lulling you to sleep.

You woke up to an empty bed next morning. Tom had an early morning flight so maybe he didn’t want to wake you up you thought, giving yourself false hopes.

First two weeks he used to FaceTime you daily but soon it got limited to plain simple texts and suddenly all of it stopped. Two months went by and you didn't hear anything from Tom but still you kept your hopes high telling yourself he must be busy.

🥀

The time of the premiere for your film was approaching and you were over the moon with just the thought that you were finally going to meet him. At the night of the premier you were dolled up in one of your designer dresses, you decided to ditch your expensive diamond necklace to wear the necklace Tom gave you before leaving. You reached the venue and stepped out of your car as your eyes were flooded with the flashes from the cameras, you gracefully walked the red carpet a wide smile adorning your face. But it didn't last long. 

You heard the crowd going frenzy chanting the name of the person you loved the most in this world. You turned around to look at him and froze. He wasn't alone, he had a woman in his arms as they smiled at the cameras. Your heart clenched when you saw the big rock shining on her ring finger. He got engaged and he brought in his fiancee to make the news public. So this was his emergency family work in London.

Tom looked around smiling when his eyes found you standing at a distance with a hardened gaze. His gaze dropped to his feet as a sense of guilt kicked in. You were disgusted and filled with hatred he left you, no he fucking lied to you and was cheating on you this entire time. You never wanted a relationship in the first place. He was the one who professed his love for you and you being the lovesick idiot believed him. 

The cast was made to stand together for a group photo. You stood to the left of him. He couldn't dare to meet your eyes. 

The movie began as you took your seats and tried focusing on the screen. Tom frequently stole glances of you as memories came flooding in. You caught him glancing at you and you could no longer take this betrayal anymore. He had imagined of getting married one day and starting a family but guess what it was true but just not with you. You informed Mike sitting beside you that you aren't feeling well, he arranged for you to leave. You got up in the middle of the movie and ran out of the auditorium. Tom saw that went after you. 

"Y/N wait! Please don't go. Let me explain!" he shouted desperately. 

You didn't listen as you ran towards your car with tears in your eyes. You got into it and drove past him as you saw his reflection in the rear view mirror desperately calling out to you. Tears pricked your eyes as you saw the necklace he gave you as a token of love dangling down your neck. You held the necklace and pulled it hard breaking the chain. You took a look at it for one last time and threw it out of the window in rage. You wailed inside the car crying your heart out. That night you made up your mind to only focus on your career no more distractions or false attachments. Your hard work has paid off because two years later you are now an internationally acclaimed star with a strong image, a role model for many and your fans adore you.

Though after that dreadful night you received a string of messages of apologies from Tom which went on for at least a month but you left all of them on seen.  Recently he had started texting you again mostly they read 'I miss you', 'can we meet?' He even went on a liking spree on your Instagram account which fueled the rumors of you two possibly getting together. You decided to ignore all of it because you always wanted him to suffer the way you did. You wanted the memories of you to haunt him for eternity like a curse he can't get rid of. 

Your car reaches Marvel's office as your bodyguard opens the door and you step out of the car you strut past the gates through the hallways to the room where the meeting was to be held. Your assistant walking by your side briefing you out about your today's schedule. You entered the room to find some of the big names in Hollywood already present and there was Tom too. This is the first time in two years you are finally meeting face to face. His eyes lit up instantly seeing you as he made his way to you enthusiastically. 

"Hi Y/N" 

"Oh hey Tom." you greeted him with a smile. 

"So how are you?" he began but you didn't answer as your eyes were trained on the person behind him, a handsome blonde with icy blue eyes walking right your way.

"Hi Harrison Osterfield." He introduced himself.

"I know, you are playing my love interest and I must say you are totally worth it." You giggled. 

"Well it’s my honor to be your love interest." he chuckled. 

Tom just stood there as a mere spectator watching his best friend and you flirt with each other. You're totally lost in him, the only thought reeling in your mind.

Fuck he’s gorgeous….. 

..................................................................................

(A/N : This crap came out of nowhere. Will I be writing a Harrison osterfield x Reader fic based on 'gorgeous'? who knows🤷‍♀️) Feedback and suggestions are always welcome.

Forever taglist: @starcoadrienette2​ @hollanddolanfangirl​

[achaoticeternal]

willow // r. weasley

RON WEASLEY X READER folklore/evermore series masterlist

Summary: Ron, Harry, and Hermione have always been your closest friends. But as we grow up and people change, how do our feelings change? Word Count: 3.1k Warnings: time jumps and weird flows but it makes sense so that the story can build. harassment. gushy love stuff (gross) A/N: based on the song willow by taylor swift

As the years passed at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, students would flourish into adolecense making them young fools for years to come. But as you often quoted to your dear friend Hermione, “We are all fools in love” - Jane Austen.

“Well if we are simply all fools in love, then tell me where is your knight in shining armor?” The young witch teased you as you sat in the courtyard, reading and simply enjoying each other’s company. 

“Oh, please, Hermione. You know me better then to be some dimwitted girl who chases around a boy who is oblivious to her affections. In fact, I feel bad for the girls who do, because if they were a little more patient, they would see that good things come in due time.”

“Really? And which prized author said that?”

“I did!” The pair of you snickered as your attentions drifted around to see if you could spot the topic of your conversation.

The two of you seemed to be the only fourth year girls who hadn’t taken fascination with boys in your year or older. Every day in the Gryffindor Common Room, many girls gossiped about the latest drama that had developed and which boys they swear fancied them. And though you enjoyed chatting with your female peers, you and Hermione had felt quite left out of the crushes and strange romances beginning to blossom.

Well, you both were left out until Viktor Krum swept Hermione off her feet, and you couldn’t exactly be mad at her for it. In fact, when she confided in you about her fling with the foreign man, you were completely ecstatic as you both giggled at how the other girls at Hogwarts would react. Jealousy took quite a toll on many girl, and apparently a few men. 

And even furthermore to Ron’s surprise, both of you had gotten dates to the Yule Ball before Harry or himself could ask you. Roger Malone, a kind Ravenclaw who you had Divination with, had asked you and you did have a wonderful evening. Even if Ron persistently made snide remarks about him before, during, and after the ball had concluded.

However, your fourth year and seemingly most dangerous year at Hogwarts, was quickly coming to a close with the students of Beauxbaton and Durmstrang leaving just a few days ago. The Summer Holiday was coming up quicker than you expected and soon your small group of friends would all be returning to your homes.

“Everything is going to change now, isn’t it?” Hermione asked our group of four after our international peers has departed.

“Yes, but we have each other.”

Once you had stepped of the Hogwarts Express, your parents whisked you away to the family summer cottage so that you could forget the grief of the past year. From watching the trials of the tournament, to puberty, and to loosing a classmate; life was quickly moving forward and your parents began to fear the return of The Dark Lord. 

Yet instead of being caught up with family time and walks along the beach, your mind counted down the days until you would be spending time with the Weasley family again before classes started. You always felt welcomed by the family of gingers and were thrilled that you were invited back after attending the Quidditch World Cup with them last summer.

For the last month, you had been owling your friends weekly, yet you seemed to be sending and receiving owls from Ron every other day. He had never been much of a writer, but claimed in his letters that he was extremely bored with the twins now being of age and not seeing his friends yet that summer.

When it became closer to time, Ron wrote to you saying that the Weasley’s had temporarily moved to a town home in the city, but that you were still welcome to join. He then wrote that his mother had owled your parents about the change and your arrangements to join the Weasley’s before school began.

And before you knew it, you were heading the Grimauld Place.

“(Y/N), darling, its time for us to go!” Your father called down from the bottom of the stairs.

You stomped down the stairs in your new summer clothes, rushing next to your parents at the fireplace. Your clothes and bags had already been sent off and now you’re parents would be sending you off as well.

“Change of plans, dear. We will be join you and the Weasley’s until dinner.”

“Alright, is everything okay?”

“Oh yes, everything is fine. We just have to attend a brief meeting and then we’ll be out of your hair.”

You and your parents arrived in the Kitchen of the hidden apartment without a hitch. Both Weasley parents along with their son, Bill, stood closest to you. From where you stood, you could also see Sirius Black, Remus Lupin, Professor Moody, Kingsley Shacklebolt, and to your surprise, Professor Snape.

“My heavens, its good to see you, (Y/N). Ron is upstairs, along with Hermione and Harry who only arrived in the past hour.” As soon as you had arrived, Mrs. Weasley had ushered you out of the room and shut the door quickly.

You looked around the dark hallway in order to try and get some idea of the flat you would be staying in for the next couple of weeks. Your gaze moved to the stairs and you began to stalk over to them and slowly make your way up, observing the wall paper and where it started to peel away from the wall. You had made it up the the landing, looking over strange vases and jars. 

Their was a faint whisper that you nearly missed, “Bloody hell.” Suddenly there were foot steps rapidly approaching you, yet your feet remained in place, your body unmoving, “(Y/N)!,” you body turned quickly towards the voice. Ron and you were chest to chest, nearly clashing into each, the red head beaming down at you as he pulled you into the hug. 

Ron had grown quite a few inches over the summer, now making him comfortably taller than you. His once long hair and been trimmed up and framed his face nicely, but still kept a boyish length that matched his personality. His embrace was warm as he pulled you tight to his chest, making your cheeks flush a dusty pink. You took the opportunity to breathe in his scent; cinnamon, flannel, and a crackling fire met your nose. Ron hadn’t completely changed, but he was certainly grown from the boy you had last seen near two months ago. It was new, like the warmth now in your chest.

“Oh-ho, look what we’ve walked into, Fred,” George called out from the end of the hallway.

“The two love birds are reuniting, George, we must not dare interrupt them,” Fred teased, the pair of them now approaching.

Ron had released his grip on you and glared at his brothers, his features showing his irritation, “Will you two bug off?” His freckled cheeks burned a deep crimson, leaving you questioning if it was out of embarrassment or that you two were caught in such close proximity. 

“Don’t be such a git, Fred, now that Angelina has broken up with you, again,” Ginny teased the twin as she approached you, pulling you into a tight hug.

“Harry and Hermione are in the other room,” Ron said and whisked you off after departing for Ginny. His fingers intertwined with yours as he he tugged you down the hallway with dull walls.

After reuniting with your friends and the meeting in the kitchen being adjourned, it was time for the group to either join for dinner, or depart. Your parents decided to depart shortly after the meeting and bidding you a sweet goodbye along with a few other members. However there was still quite a crowd that Molly had left to feed. 

Once dinner had concluded after much laughter and discussing the past summer and what this upcoming school year held, people began trickling away from the dinner table. This left just the Weasley family, Harry Sirius, Hermione, and yourself.

“Well, Ron, it is your turn for dish duty tonight,” Molly told her youngest son while levitating all the dishes towards the sink.

“I can help you if you’d like,” You looked to Ron who was sitting in front of him.

“(Y/N), dear, you don’t have to do that. You are a guest here. Ron will be able to handle it.”

“Well, she is welcome to join me by staying in the kitchen or help,” He smiled warmly at you and a new found warmth spread through your chest. Never had such a feeling come to fruition in you.

The rest of the group departed from the kitchen with only yourself and Ron remaining. Wordlessly, the two of you approached the sink. Ron began to wash the dishes, while you jumped up on to the counter next to him. As he cleaned them, you would dry them. It was a nice and soft moment, the pair of you making light conversation.

“It’s just all crazy to me, how much we’ve grown recently. I mean, this summer has felt like years when it’s really been only two months since I saw you last,” Ron handed you a plate as he complained.

“Well why are you complaining? You practically grown three summers worth in one,” you giggled and he lightly splashed the tap water on you. 

“Do I at least still have my boyish charm?” He stuck his tongue out at you as you squealed and upon settling, sent you a wink. You scrunched your nose in response, as you attempted to distract him away from the warmth that spread across your face, “I’m teasing, I’m teasing.”

All the dishes were soon washed, dried, and placed in there respective cabinets all without the use of magic, “You know it’s nice to have you around again,” Ron spoke, placing the final cup into the cupboard. He then strolled his way over to the counter where you sat, leaning his hip against it as he faced you.

“I love my family, but they don’t give me the same sense of home that you do...” By that time, Ron had managed to snake his way between your legs and then counter. His face was mere inches from yours and you create various constellations with the freckles on his face. The pair of you stayed their in each other’s warm presence, not wanting to leave the situation, yet wondering whether to take it further. 

The tension began to feel overwhelming as you began to get lost in whatever feeling was happening between the pair of you. So you tried to rationalize the situation like you always did and pulled him into a close hug. Your arms held tightly around his shoulders as you felt the same temptation to wrap your legs around his waist. He latched his arms around your waist with the same fever, “Would it be completely crazy that you feel like home to me?”

Soon the summer holiday melted away into another year at Hogwarts, except this year presented itself in stranger circumstances. At the end of term, you were to take your O.W.L.S and prepare for a career in the wizarding world. However, there was yet another new Defense Against the Dark Arts professor who was interesting to say the least. Hermione has whispered to you at dinner the first night that the Minister himself placed Dolores Umbridge at Hogwarts to spy on Dumbledore. 

And to make things stranger, Dumbledore was barely around the castle like in years before and Harry kept having strange dreams about He Who Shall Not Be Named. Umbridge also refused to teach her students magic through practice and so your quartet had taken it into your own hands to begin Dumbledore’s army. All through the fall term and now into the spring, your ragtag group had successfully practiced and avoided the toad discovering your whereabouts; moreover, your relationship with Ron had started to change since summer and it made you nervous. 

When you confided in Hermione after the events at Grimauld Place and her taking notice to both Ron’s and your body language, she tried her best to put it into words for you. “You have a crush on Ron, (Y/N)! And apparently he fancies you, as well.”

“But ‘Mione, I don’t know what to do. I’ve never really had a crush like this before. And I don’t want him to become a distraction with the O.W.L.S at the end of the year,” You tried to reason out things, and make everything seem more logical like you did with every other problem that had faced you before.

“This is one thing that can’t be control with logic and reason. That’s not how emotions are supposed to be felt,” she giggled as she squeezed your hand in hers. 

“I-I know, but I feel like a...a little pixie. constantly hanging around him and in the way of everything and-”

“(Y/N), I think that Ron prefers to have you around,” The bells chimed outside the castle, “I’ll see you at practice after class.”

“See you,” And with that, Hermione left for her final class of the day and you went about roaming the castle on your free period. 

You strolled around, admiring the ancient castle for all her walls had to offer where you now found yourself in the westwing. You were one of few students your year to be allowed to take a free period because of your academic standing and use that time for study or leisure. 

When you neared the hall where the Room of Requirement was, you placed yourself in a window sill to simply enjoy yourself. You pulled out one of the Herbology books you picked at the library and began reading as you relaxed. Yet the moment was short lived as you heard a voice call your last name.

“(Y/L/N), (Y/L/N)!” Draco Malfoy was strutting down the corridor towards where you were seated.

You jumped down from your ledge, giving him a curious look, “Is there something I can help you with Draco?”

“Why aren’t you in class, (Y/L/N)? You could loose points for Gryffindor for not being where you should be,” He snarled at you.

“It just so happens I have a free period to do what I please with myself, so if you will pardon me-” You snatched your bag, but before you could turn to leave Draco snatched your wrist into his hand.

“You’re a terrible liar,” He sneered, his face inching closer to yours.

“Malfoy,” Ron appeared behind you, his presence jarring Draco into letting you go. You backed yourself into Ron’s chest, allowing him to be your protector from the Slytherin boy. He ghosted his hand over your hips as if he were trying to pulling you further from Draco, “What seems to be the problem?”

“(Y/N) here seems to be skipping class, which is such a shame since she’s supposed to be such a bright little witch. I figure a detention with Umbridge should straighten her back up.”

“Excuse me,” you quipped to defend yourself and Draco glared daggers at you.

“See happens to have a free period mate, so just bugger off, mate,” Ron stepped in front of you to guard you from the predator that was in the form of Draco Malfoy, “Why don’t you go perform your prefect duties where there are actually students skipping classes or causing trouble?”

Draco’s eyes flickered between the pair of you, and you couldn’t tell which of you he disdained more in this moment, “Whatever, Weasley. I knew you were ever a filthy Pureblood, but I didn’t expect it from you, (Y/N). Both of you and your families are disgraces of Pureblood Wizards.” With his final blow, Malfoy stomped off in the opposite way to find his next prey.

Immediately, you let out the breathe you didn’t even realize you were holding, “Are you alright, (Y/N)?”

Ron now faced you, holding your arms with his large hands, as his eyes scanned for any outward physical or emotional distress Draco could have caused you. You knew that Ron wouldn’t hold himself back from throwing the first punch if he suspected Draco has hurt you.

“I’m quite alright, Ron. I’m just glad you found me when you did, before Draco could take me to her office,” you shuddered at the thought of Umbridge and what she had done to your peers.

His hand flew to your face as he tucked a stray piece of hair behind your ear. His blue eyes gazed deeply into yours, searching for some sort of answering that hid behind his eyes. “Ron-?”

Before you could continue speaking, Ron pressed his lips to yours and you responded just as quick. A strong feeling in your gut assured you that this is where you were supposed to be, in Ron’s arm, his lips connected with yours. Every emotion that every girl had talked about when being around a boy suddenly made sense, and felt more intense with Ron. After what felt like a lifetime, the pair of you pulled apart from each other. 

He offered you a half-smile as he appeared too love struck to form a coherent sentence, “I-I”, you pressed another kiss to his lips as if to bring him back into reality. After all this time, everything seemed right and perfect in this little moment in time. 

It didn’t matter that Umbridge kept sending out her wolves to discover your little army, or if it was only due time till Voldemort made an appearance. Ron was at your side and you were by his through anything that could possibly happen in this lifetime or any other. 

Once you pulled away, he rested his forehead against yours and giggled, “Is now a bad time to say that I quite fancy you?”

“You’re unbearable, Weasley,” You scrunched your nose and turned, beginning your walk to practice. When you didn’t hear him behind you, you turned to see his standing there with his mouth hanging open. You sighed and offered your hand out, “well, are you coming?”

The red head grinned as he took your hand, taking large strides as he giggled, absolutely over the moon that he had just kissed you and was now holding your hand. The pair of you, hand in hand, made your way to join your friends in the Room of Requirement, preparing for whatever came ahead of you.

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[hxlyhead-harpies]

Gold Rush (S.B.)

Evermore

Summary: You want someone you can never have

Based On: Gold Rush by Taylor Swift

Word Count: 1.3k

Warnings: None

Your lips parted as he walked by, taking in every inch of his being. His gleaming black hair, his wide and carefree smile, and his light and sparkling eyes. Every bit of him was beautiful. From your spot at the Hufflepuff table, you couldn’t take your eyes off him. It was as if his mere presence drew you in, the second he entered the room your eyes zoned in on him. He looked up briefly, his eyes catching yours. He sent you a quick smile, the corners of his mouth quirking up to reveal the dimple you adored so much. 

You looked away as fast as you could. 

You hated that Sirius Black had such an effect on you. The sound of his voice alone would turn you into a pile of mush, helplessly blushing and stuttering, unable to meet his eyes. You didn’t like that when he laughed you could hear your heartbeat in your ears and you despised that when he was around you could never quite think of what to say. 

But what you hated the most, was that you weren’t the only one who felt this way. It seemed that almost everyone at Hogwarts was under the same spell as you. Countless girls before you had tried their hand at taming Sirius Black, but it never worked. He was carefree and didn’t like to be tethered, bouncing from one fling to the next, completely content in his lifestyle. But that didn’t stop everyone from wanting him anyway. 

You weren’t the only one who daydreamed of holding his hand and brushing his hair from his face. You were one of many. 

You pushed past the gaggles of students as you attempted to make your way to History of Magic. You hated crowds and unfortunately, the third-floor hallways were always completely overrun in between classes. Your shoulders knocked against your peers are you tried to push through, your nose crinkling with frustration. You felt a hand on your upper arm and the quiet murmur of an apology. You looked up to see Sirius maneuvering past you, sending you an apologetic smile. You froze in place, watching his form disappear into the crowd, time seemingly slowing. You felt your cheeks heat up, the familiar flush making its way onto your cheeks. You frowned and walked away. 

You sat in the library, your transfiguration notes in front of you, rubbing your tired eyes. Exams were coming up and you were studying nonstop. It appeared that the rest of the older students had the same idea, as the library was teeming with frantic teenagers pouring over their assignments. The words on the page were swimming past your eyes and a dull ache was beginning to throb at the back of your head. It was the consequence of revising for hours, but you couldn’t yet afford to put your book away. 

“May I sit here?” a voice asked, startling you. You jumped slightly and looked up to meet eyes with Sirius. He was gesturing to the chair in front of you, one of the only unoccupied ones in the room. 

“Yeah, yeah, of course,” you muttered, praying that your cheeks would stay their normal hue. He sent you an appreciative smile before sitting down. 

“What are you studying?” he asked, peering over at your work. 

“Transfiguration,” you groaned. Sirius smirked at you. 

“Not going so well, then?” he asked, his eyebrows raised. 

“Not particularly,” you said, “McGonagall’s curriculum is brutal.” Sirius let out an affirming hum before snatching your textbook from out in front of you. 

“Let me quiz you,” he suggested, his mouth quirked up. You narrowed your eyes at him.

“Don’t you have to study?” you inquired. Sirius shrugged. 

“This is sort of like studying. Besides, I’m only here because I’ve been banned from my room,” he said with a mischievous smile. You leaned your elbows against the table and rested your head in your palm. 

“How did you get banished from your room?” you asked, taking the bait. Sirius flicked his hair back and beamed. 

“Why, (Y/n), I am so glad you asked,” he said. You attempted not to let your face waver as you internally screamed. Apparently, Sirius knew your name. 

“Well,” he started, “I had the marvelous idea to turn James’ hair a lovely shade of pink since he is supposed to be having a study date with Lily tonight. Apparently, he didn’t appreciate that, and now Remus and Peter are trying to fix it because James is having a minor breakdown. I was kicked out because every time he caught sight of me he tried to kill me.” You chuckled softly. 

“Pink? Really?” you asked, a smile spreading across your face. 

“Yes pink,” Sirius laughed, “I thought it was quite hilarious.” You shrugged.

“I don’t know, I would have turned it red. Then he and Evans could have matched,” joked. Sirius barked out a laugh, leaning back into his chair. 

“That’s brilliant,” he said, giving you an appraising look. You ducked your head, the compliment sending a shock down your body. He was easier to talk to than you had imagined, the conversation flowing easily. His presence and his mere acknowledgment of your existence made you feel as if you were floating. 

The feeling was soon dashed, the feeling of flying quickly turning into the feeling of crashing into the ground. Emmeline Vance came up behind Sirius, wrapping her arms around his neck. Sirius smiled and leaned into her touch. You had forgotten that she was the girl he was seeing this week, and you felt your stomach drop as she whispered into his ear. He grinned as he listened to what she had to say, before getting up from the table. He looked at you, passing your book back across the table. 

“Can I take a raincheck on quizzing you?” he asked nonchalantly as if he didn’t even care about the answer. You swallowed and nodded quickly. 

“Yeah, yeah, of course,” you said, avoiding his eyes. Sirius nodded before tugging Emmeline out of the library behind him, her giggles echoing off of the walls. 

It felt as if a stone had settled in your stomach, your face hot and your throat thick. You hated that he had this effect on you more than anything. 

You saw yourself in a flat somewhere in London, your old Hufflepuff jumper hanging off the back of an armchair. You padded across the floor to the kitchen, grabbing a mug and setting up the kettle. You felt strong arms wrap around your middle and a face nuzzling into your neck. His hair fell across his face and onto your shoulder, tickling at your skin. 

“Good morning,” Sirius’ murmured, his breath hot against your neck. 

“Good morning, you,” you replied as he kissed your jaw before moving away. 

You blinked, looking down at the tea in front of you. It was cold and grey by now, sitting there forgotten as you daydreamed. You looked across the great hall at the object of your fantasies. He was laughing dramatically with his friends, not even sparing a glance your way. Not that you expected that of course, while he was everything to you, you were inconsequential in the scheme of his life. 

You had these daydreams often, imagining what a life of domesticity with Sirius would be like. You imagined a dog and a nice apartment or a house by the coast. You imagined lazy mornings and nights spent roaming the city. You imagined dinner parties where you’d make fun of his quotes and call him out on his contrarianism. You imagined that he would love you and that you would finally get to know what it was like to love him. 

But then you’d be startled out of your daydream, reminded of the painful reality that he would never think of you that way. Sirius would take a glance around the room and look straight through you as if you weren’t even there. 

Because you could imagine a life with him all you wanted. But deep down, you knew that it could never be.

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