#yes it's hungry jacks and NOT burger king

[baileyartblog]

a lot has changed since clown college!

[formulaforza]

yes aussie had to change the name to hungry jacks bc there was already a burger king when the franchise got there

crazy

[delugedecade]

So if Sephiroth likes McDonald. That means Cloud and Zake like Burger King

Ahem

Yes

I don't care if the Mericans don't really like Burger King

As an Australian, where our Burger King is called Hungry Jacks, Hungry Jacks has some damn good burgers.

So yes, My headcanon is that Cloud and Zack like Hungry Jacks Burger King

[emmy-writes-sometimes]

Sneaky

You’re Chris’s daughter. When he tells you that he’s going out for the night, you take the opportunity to have your boyfriend over and hope that he doesn’t find out.

-

           “Why are you on your phone during school?” Your dad asked as you picked up your phone. You rolled your eyes.

           “You’re the one who called me,” you scoffed.

           “I know, I’m just messing with you. Cheadle’s in town and asked me if I want to get dinner, so you’re on your own tonight. I’ll bring you something on my way home if I don’t hear you’re throwing a wild party.”  

           “That’s fine,” you shrugged. “Have fun.”

           “I’ll be home around nine-thirty. You know the drill, lock the door, feed the dog.”

           “Yep.”

           “Okay. I love you.”

           “I love you too.” You clicked the call shut and locked your phone, prepared to put it in your locker so you didn’t get in trouble with the school, who insisted everyone put their phone in their locker during classes. And then you turned to your boyfriend, who was standing beside you.

           “What was that about?” He asked.

           “My dad’s going to dinner tonight, so you can come over,” you relayed. You lied about the last part – your dad was very strict about letting boys come over, just because he knew how he used to be with girls and you were exactly like him and the last thing he wanted was to have to take you to get a pregnancy test at the age of seventeen.

           “He said I could come over?” Your boyfriend, Jack, raised an eyebrow. Your dad loved him, really, but if he knew you’d asked him to come over he’d say no. He would give you a hard, fast no.

           “Well, he’s going to be gone, so it really doesn’t matter.” Jack laughed.

           “You’re crafty. I’ll bring homework so when he comes home and I’m still there, we won’t be doing anything he wouldn’t approve of.” You rolled your eyes. Jack was a good kid, and that was probably why your dad loved him so much. Jack wouldn’t so much as touch your lower back unsupervised.

           “Oh, come on.”

           “He’ll find out, and I’d rather not get yelled at,” Jack responded. The bell rang for your third to last period and Jack looked up at the ceiling, kissed your cheek, and left for his own class. You walked to your own, grateful that at least you’d have some company.

           You pulled into the driveway at half past three, knowing your dad was already gone, and were greeted by Dodger waiting for you at the door. You kneeled down and pet him before letting him out to the gated backyard. And, knowing Jack would be over right after football practice, you went and took a long, hot shower. You weren’t trying to seduce him, you were seventeen, but you still wanted to look prettier than you did earlier. You knew your plan was working when Jack walked in the back door, since he parked his car at the park down the street so your dad wouldn’t figure it out. Honestly, he probably would, but Jack would be gone by the time he got home.

           “Can I borrow your books?” He asked as he walked up behind you, kissing your shoulder.

           “You actually want to do homework?” You pouted a little, watching as he kneeled down to pet Dodger.

           “That’s why I’m here,” he winked.

           “Come on. I’m setting an alarm for nine so you can be long gone by the time my dad gets back.” You walked up the stairs, watching as he picked Dodger up to bring him too. You swore both your dad and Jack loved the dog more than they loved you. He dropped the dog down at your bedroom door, watching as the dog made his way over to the little dog bed beside yours.

           “I’m getting in bed,” you announced, crossing your arms. “Feel free to join me.” Your boyfriend laughed.

           “You do that. I’ll be over in a second.” You gave him a sly smile, knowing you were about to get what you wanted. In a few minutes you had your headphones in and were avoiding homework by watching Netflix, while he was beside you using your lap as a way to prop up a textbook.

           You must have fallen asleep, because the next time you woke up, Jack was shaking you. It was dark outside, your phone was dead, and you glanced over at the digital alarm clock on your nightstand. You sat up, hearing the familiar noise of your dad shutting a car door. Jack looked alarmed, probably because there was no way out of the house if your dad was there. The only way to get back to his car was to go out the front door, where your dad was.

           “Oh my God,” you sighed. “You should’ve plugged in my phone or woken me up, or…”

           “I forgot what time it was! And you were sleeping really well,” Jack tried to say.

           “Ugh, just get under my bed! And pull the skirt over you!” You shoved him away and stood up, listening as the key started fumbling in the front door. Even after living in that house all your life, your dad could still not work the keys. You watched Jack crawl underneath the bed, saw his backpack, and threw a folded blanket over it to hide it. And then you sat in the middle of the bed, plugging your phone in, and tried to act innocent.

           “Sweetie?” You heard your dad call up to you. The smell of fast food wafted to your nose, making you realize how hungry you were, and you heard his footsteps on the carpeted stairs. You looked down again, hoping that Jack underneath the bed wasn’t noticeable.

           “Hey!” You called at him as he entered the doorway to your room. You could smell Jack’s cologne a little bit, but you were wearing one of his old t-shirts so it could have just been that. If you didn’t stop acting paranoid, your dad would definitely find out. Your dad appeared in the doorway to your room holding a bag of food and a drink.

           “Hey, how was school?” He asked.

           “Fine,” you shrugged. “How was Don?” Your dad walked over to you and handed you the bag of food. You tipped your head when you realized there were two burgers and three sets of fries in there, almost like…

           “Good.”

           “Why’s there so much food then?” You asked, confused.

           “I was halfway home when I realized I forgot to get you anything. And I drove past the park and saw Jack’s car. By the way, Jack, how’s your mom doing after the surgery?” You froze, eyes going wide, as you heard motion under the bed.

           “She’s good!” Jack called. You shut your eyes, sighing, ready for punishment. “Thanks for the food, Mr. Evans.”

           “Yeah, just ask me next time instead of sneaking guys into your room and under your bed that I know you haven’t cleaned in ages,” your dad sighed. “Jack, if you’d like to come out, you’re welcome to eat here before I drive you back to your car.”

           “But… but we…” You stuttered. “What?”

           “You’re talking to the king of sneaking girls into his room,” your dad said. “Oh, by the way, Jack, you can park your car in the driveway next time. Just make sure there’s room for me.” He winked at Jack, causing you to look over as he emerged from the bed. You felt your cheeks going pink.

           “Yes, sir.”

           “Also, did anyone feed the dog? Or were you two busy taking naps?”

[vogelmeister]

I am bored and I feel like making the fact that I am not from America a personality trait

So here is Buzzfeed’s 21 Questions America Has For Australia

Why is your money so colourful? 

Why is yours green. I love looking in my wallet, seeing yellow and knowing I have $50 

Also, why is it made out of plastic? 

To make it harder to destroy and copy I think. I actually learnt why but it was in 2011 and god knows if i remember 

Did you really put kangaroos on your coins? 

YES! and it’s on our emblem too!

Wait, you eat them? 

I have probably eaten it twice in my life but yes, you can eat it. I remember it being quite nice too, and apparently its good for you. 

That being said, the one time we ate it was when we legit had a German exchange student so.....

And we also had PRAWNS as well, and explained no one here says shrimp on the barbie

Is ANYTHING available in your country? 

No. Absolutely nothing. We are but a baron wasteland of non availability.

(of course stuff is available here)

You guys ever hear of shirts? 

HAVE YOU SEEN HOW HOT IT GETS IN SUMMER!? But real talk aside yes, we have heard of shirts and we will wear them in winter. It gets cold here too. We do have snowy mountains. Further, my hometown reaches 50 in summer and 10 in winter so like...

How much bagged wine do you people drink?! 

I have personally, never had a goon sack but like i know people who do drink it a bit. I don’t feel qualified to answer this tbh

Have you ever made it through a sentence without swearing?

On the regular. 

What’s with the Celsius? Who do you think you are? England?

get the FUCK off your high horse America. You guys are LEGIT the only people that use Fahrenheit. And yes, we are still part of the commonwealth so it kinda makes sense that we have those British influences  

 Why are your pharmacies called chemists? And why don’t they sell beer?

I actually don’t know. But I think it would be irresponsible to sell beer with medicine, don’t you? 

How are you this bad at baseball? (And why do you call it cricket?)

I am Australian. I have played baseball (well softball, which is the female version) for PSSA sport in primary school. I was bad at it.  I have also played cricket. I sucked at it, too. They are two different sports. See how in Cricket there are stumps, which aren’t used in baseball, and the bat is long and flat unlike, well, the baseball bat. That should be a giveaway. 

Why do you call ketchup “tomato sauce”? (And charge for it?)

We are straightforward people. It is tomato, as a sauce. 

Why do you call Burger King “Hungry Jack’s”? (And breakfast “brekky”?)

About brekky- we shorten everything. Arvo, servo, Scomo- you name it. About Hungry Jacks, there was a lawsuit when they tried to open here because a tiny shop somewhere already was called burger king and refused to change it.

Why are your large pizzas the size of our personal pizzas?

Why are your large pizzas a feast for the entire nation? Thats what I wanna say. 

Why are your pies filled with meat instead of fruit?

OK OK OK HOLD UP! MEAT PIES ARE A NATIONAL TREASURE 

How is “high” your SECOND-LOWEST fire danger rating?

Lemme give you vogelmeister science from someone who dropped science in Year 10. When it is hot and dry, things are more likely to catch on fire. And guess what Australia is? A HOT AND DRY NATION.  

THERE WAS LEGIT A DROUGHT. A PICTURE OF MY HOMETOWN IN 2019 vs 2020 ONLY PROVES HOW DRY AUSTRALIA CAN GET WHEN THERE IS NO RAIN.

We also have bushfire seasons most summer but ya’ll only seemed to care this year

Why is this something you’re proud of?! Get out of there! (the picture is saying there are 200 species of spider here btw)

*SHIVERS* let us have this one thing.

Why do your pigeons look like this? (picture of a bin chicken) 

That is not a pigeon. Thats a bin chicken. And we hate them. (We have pigeons in Australia)

And how is the one creature that CAN’T kill you outlawed? (rabbits)

To protect our unique wildlife. Rabbits literally were introduced and are pests to the wildlife here and we wanna protect our natural wildlife. 

And seriously, what’s the deal with Vegemite?

Ok. I don’t like vegemite. It’s not my favourite thing. And I will get kicked out of Australia for that.

But you’re eating it wrong. It should not be spooned out like nutella, but rather spread thinly as possible and you have it with butter. 

i am actually feeling quite patriotic now. 

[misc-headcanons]

Hi c: First things first, I love your blog I saw requests were open, so I wanted to ask a nsfw alphabet for Bartolomeo, if you’re ok with it.

(Hell yeah, it’s Barto Time :3)

A = Aftercare (What they’re like after sex)

Barto is ready to tend to your every need after sex. You want ANYTHING, his crew will bring it to you with a call on his DenDen Mushi. It connects to the speakers on the ship, and he orders his men to bring you whatever you need. (“I’m kinda hungry now…” “On it. Oi, bring up some–what do you want, babe?” “I’m craving burgers right now.” “Bring up some burgers to my room. Whoever makes the best one and gets it here fastest gets a copy of one of my autographed posters!”)

B = Body part (Their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

He likes his partner’s face. He just enjoys cupping your cheek and kissing you everywhere he can; your soft lips, your cute squishy cheeks, little kisses on the tip of your nose…As for his body, he likes his hair. His hairstyle is awesome (to him, at least), it’s an eye-catching color, and his hair is just so soft; he loves whenever you run your fingers through his hair.

C = Cum (Anything to do with cum basically… I’m a disgusting person)

His cum is on the thick side, translucent whitish-colored, and a little bitter. Nothing that will make you gag, though.

D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Okay, so Bartolomeo knows that Luffy isn’t really interested in sex, BUT…he’s had this recurrent dream where he’s in a threesome with you and Luffy-sama, and it always results in him moaning both of your names and absolutely ruining his sheets. Even if Luffy did have an interest in sex, Barto feels he isn’t worthy enough to sleep with him. I mean, sometimes he thinks isn’t worthy enough to sleep with someone as gorgeous and loving as YOU, so the idea of having a threesome with you two is too much for him to think about.

E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)

Personally, I think he’s a virgin. He talks a lot of game, but the instant you make a move on him for the first time he’s a blushing mess. As long as you and the Straw Hats aren’t around, he gives off the impression he’s had sex before with how confident he is, but any questions about any of his past (and nonexistent) conquests makes him crumble a bit. He’s actually gotten close to sleeping with a few people in the past, but once he takes them to his room, they see the shit ton of Straw Hats merch (posters, plushies, cosplay outfits, handmade figures, etc.) and they peace the fuck out. To be fair, seeing a dozen plushies of Luffy, Chopper, and the rest of the gang looking straight at you during sex would be…offputting.

F = Favourite Position (This goes without saying. Will probably include a visual)

The first time you two have sex, he’s anxious about where he should be and he lets you take the reins. He would want to experiment with a few different positions, and he finds he likes being on the bottom most of the time with you riding him. Cowgirl is his go-to, but as long as he gets to see your face he’s a happy man.

http://sexpositions.club/positions/113.html

http://sexpositions.club/positions/283.html

http://sexpositions.club/positions/55.html

G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc)

He tries to be serious and put on his cocky, confident persona (like how he was at the start of the Arena), but it falls apart almost immediately when you two first have sex. Whether or not he’s goofy in bed depends on his partner, since he’ll follow their lead and try to match their energy. If you’re more serious, he’s more serious. If you’re more giggly, so is he.

H = Hair (How well groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.)

Yes, it’s green. And yes, he grooms it as meticulously as the hair on his head. He has a small happy trail and he used to shave it, but after overhearing a few women talk about how they found men with happy trails hot he decided to leave it. It’s surprisingly soft by pubic hair standards!

I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect…)

Barto is VERY intimate and romantic. He may come across as a monstrous badass as Bartolomeo the Cannibal, but in the bedroom he is so gentle. He wants to worship you like the king/queen you are, and sex with him involves a lot of foreplay. He likes positions where he can look you in the eyes and cup your cheek as you ride him, and his hands and mouth never stop exploring your body. His kisses have a little sharpness to them thanks to his teeth, and he tries not to draw blood or hurt you unless that’s what you want.

J = Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon)

Does it about three times a week. He gets hard at the drop of a hat, and it doesn’t subside unless he takes care of it himself. He had a magazine when he was younger, but now he prefers to use his imagination. Even though he does fantasize about some of the Straw Hats, he would NEVER use any of their merch or wanted posters– If he tainted any of his mint-condition, pristine posters of them, he would throw himself into the ocean with his pants still around his ankles. Once he’s with you, he sticks to thinking about you…and/or Nami sleeping with you. And/or Robin. And/or Franky, Zoro, Sanji, Usopp, Luffy-sama…

K = Kink (One or more of their kinks)

This is a Straw Hat-only fetish, but cuckolding and/or group sex. Obviously this doesn’t apply to Chopper, but as for everyone else? Hell yes. As stated above, he loves the idea of sleeping with you and one or more of his idols at the same time. He wouldn’t even have to be involved, either; seeing Zoro-san taking you from behind with Nami and Robin both sharing you in front, Franky using a few “special inventions” on you, Luffy completely wrapped around you and giving Bartolomeo a sly wink…INSTANT NUT. He feels guilty whenever his fantasies involve Luffy, a) because he doesn’t feel worthy enough to sleep with Luffy or even watch him in bed and b) he gets the feeling Luffy wouldn’t really be into that. Still, it turns him on like you wouldn’t believe.

Non-Straw Hat kinks? He gets really turned on when you wear his clothes, and if you wore his coat while riding him he would lose it. He’s also a bit of a sub, so he likes being on the receiving end of some light BDSM/teasing/edging. He also has a praise kink. It doesn’t even need to be sexual, just tell him he’s a great fighter or that his hair looks cool and his pants will start to get tight.

L = Location (Favourite places to do the do)

He isn’t too fond of public sex. Sex is one of the few times he indulges in being submissive and vulnerable, and he doesn’t want any random assholes to see him desperately begging for you to make him cum. He usually sticks to a bed, couch, or the floor of his room. While he doesn’t want people to catch him in the act, he DOES enjoy bragging to the crew over his DenDen Mushi once you two are finished. (“Guys, I just made ____ cum four times in a row!” And then there’s just a fucking chorus of cheering from every part of the ship)

M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going)

Like I said, he enjoys seeing you in his clothes and any time you praise him he gets turned on. Seeing you kick someone’s ass or verbally go off on someone is also really hot to him; he already knows you’re a badass, but there’s something about seeing you just wreck a bitch that makes his blood rush south.

N = NO (Something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Nothing that would hurt you. If you’re a masochist, he would try really hard to satisfy you, but he just can’t bring himself to do anything really major. Like he would NEVER under any circumstances slap you during sex, even if you beg him to. I mean the dude apologizes if he grips your hips too hard or if he accidentally bites you when he’s giving you a hickey.

He thought he would enjoy roleplay, but it turns out it just isn’t his thing. He doesn’t wanna fuck you if you’re pretending to be someone else, he wants you. And he’d be kinda hurt if you wanted him to pretend to be something he isn’t.

No bodily fluids. He enjoys being teased and degraded, but he does NOT wanna be pissed on. If you get periods though and you want to have sex during Shark Week, he’s fine with sex as long as it’s easy to clean up after (having sex in the shower, putting a few towels down on the bed, etc.)

O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)

He likes to give you oral, but he worries about hurting you with his sharp teeth. If you have a penis, he learns how to deepthroat as soon as possible so he can take all of you in his mouth (and he firmly believes that spitters are quitters. You cum in his mouth, and he WILL swallow and wipe what’s left off his lips before pulling you in for a kiss.)

If you’ve got a vagina, he improves his tongue’s dexterity by trying to tie a cherry stem in his mouth every day until he can do it easily. The closest he really gets to being dominant is when he’s giving you oral; he’ll pin your legs down with a  small growl and stare at you intensely as he eats you out like you’re his last meal.

His first time isn’t anything amazing, but he’s a fast learner. Once you two have been together a few times, he learns how to tell when you like what he’s doing.

P = Pace (Are they fats and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.)

He’s the kind of guy to start slow and sensual, but the closer he gets to cumming the faster and more desperate he gets. Because he prefers having you on top, he likes to let you set the pace; he also LOVES when you two go faster and faster, and you suddenly slow down to tease him right as he’s about to cum.

Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.)

He’s cool with quickies! Whether it’s because you just need to fuck away your pent-up stress or you just have a busy day, he totally understands why you’d want a quickie. He’d prefer proper sex though, but if you ask for a quick round he eagerly agrees. He doesn’t initiate quickies that often, maybe once or twice a month.

R = Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.)

Barto trusts you completely, so he’s open to trying anything with you at least once. Even with his turn-offs, he’ll really try to experiment with his boundaries; if you wanted him to hurt you, he’d just start grabbing your ass a bit rougher than usual; after some prodding from you, he’d spank you. But any further than that, and he’d say he doesn’t feel okay with it.

S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…)

Barto’s stamina is fairly low at first; the first time he has sex, he was so overstimulated and overwhelmed with emotion that he just collapsed after his first orgasm. As he sleeps with you more often, his stamina builds up and now he can go three or four rounds before he needs to tap out. He doesn’t take a break until you’ve climaxed at LEAST twice. Like his stamina, he doesn’t last very long at first but he can go longer and longer over time. Since he refuses to stop until you’ve cum at least twice, he’ll push himself to keep going even if he doesn’t know how long he can last. He’ll typically last about 15 minutes per round on average, and he usually manages to make you cum before then.

T = Toy (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?)

He’s a simple guy; when it comes to jacking off, all he ever needed was his own hand a good imagination. So he doesn’t own any toys, but if his partner wanted to try them out he would happily try some out (whether it’s on him or on his s/o)

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

He prefers being teased by you, so he’ll only do it a little bit if he knows it’ll get you to “punish” him for it. If he notices that you enjoy being teased, he’ll do it a bit more during foreplay (kissing your neck and earlobe, dragging his teeth along your skin, lightly squeezing your thighs, etc.)

V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)

He’s pretty damn loud, not gonna lie. He doesn’t mean to be, but you just make him feel so good! He doesn’t like anyone aside from you to hear him beg, but because he’s so loud he usually has to quiet himself by moaning with his mouth against your body or by making a soundproof barrier around the two of you. He’d love it if you gagged him to keep him from making so much noise, whether that be with a ball gag or just a piece of cloth.

Constantly switches between praising you and begging you like the desperate little slut he is. When he cums, it’s usually with a low whine/growl thing that’s just…so hot when you hear it. If you’re the kind of person to make him say things in bed, he does it immediately without any thought to who might hear you, which is why he usually makes a soundproof barrier before you two go at it (“C’mon, Barto, tell me how bad you wanna cu–” “Ah, fuck, ____, I need you to make me cum so badly, I can’t take it anymore! Fuck, please, please…”)

W = Wild Card (Get a random headcanon for the character of your choice)

While he usually makes a soundproof barrier, he used to forget to lock his bedroom door in the heat of the moment. Long story short, Cavendish once walked in on the two of you: Bartolomeo was gagged and blindfolded, and Cavendish had walked in on him right as you two were cumming. Thanks to the barrier, he couldn’t hear you two but he saw everything. He just froze and his eyes widened, and once you realized he was there and made eye contact, he just slowly backed out of the room. You didn’t tell Barto what had happened, but now you always make sure his door is locked whenever you two are about to have sex. If Bartio knew that Cavendish had seen him being your blindfolded and gagged fucktoy, he wouldn’t even know how to deal with it.

X = X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on in those pants, picture or words)

Your boy is a shower: 7 ½ inches flaccid and 8 ½ inches erect. Fairly average girth, and it’s a little pink at the tip. It’s got one vein on the left side, but it isn’t noticeable unless you’re staring at his dick for a while.

Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)

Ideally, he wants to have sex 4 to 5 times a week, so his sex drive is pretty high. He doesn’t even care if it’s just oral most of the time; as long as he busts a nut, he doesn’t care how it comes about.

Z = ZZZ (… how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

It depends on the time of day. Morning sex actually makes him energized and pumped, but afternoon and evening sex makes him more sleepy once he’s climaxed. He’s more likely to fall asleep in the evening, but he won’t do it if you’re in need of some aftercare. Once you’re satisfied (in more ways than one~), he collapses against his mattress and holds you close for some post-sex cuddling until he falls asleep. If you spoon him, run your hands through his hair, and murmur some gentle praises in his hear, he’ll melt in your arms.

[bat-titans]

[Jason and Cass break up an operation that Scarface, The Ventriloquist and The Condiment King are running out of an abandoned Gotham apartment]

Jason(as Red Hood): Looks like me and Orphan caught you boys at breakfast. Sorry about that. Whatcha having?

The Ventriloquist: Uh, hamburgers.

Jason(as Red Hood): Hamburgers! The cornerstone of any nutritious breakfast! What kind of hamburgers?

The Ventriloquist: Uh, Ch-cheeseburgers.

Jason(as Red Hood): No, where'd you get them? McDonald's, Wendy's, Jack in the Box, WHERE?

The Ventriloquist: Um, Big Kahuna Burgers.

Jason(as Red Hood): Big Kahuna Burgers! That's that Hawaiian burger joint. I hear they've got some tasty burgers. I ain't never had one myself, how are they?

The Ventriloquist: ...They're good.

Jason(as Red Hood): You mind if I try one of yours? This is yours here, right?

The Ventriloquist: Yeah.

[Jason takes a bite of the Hamburger]

Jason(as Red Hood): Mmm, this is a tasty burger! Orphan, you ever had a Big Kahuna Burger? (Cass shakes her head) Want a bite, they're real tasty.

Cass(as Orphan): Ain't hungry.

Jason(as Red Hood): Well, if you like burgers, give them a try sometime. Me, I can't usually get 'em because my girlfriend's a vegetarian, which, pretty much makes me a vegetarian. I do love the taste of a good burger. (turns to The Ventriloquist) You know what they call a Quarter Pounder with cheese in France?

The Ventriloquist: Um, no.

Jason(as Red Hood): Tell 'em, Orphan.

Cass(as Orphan): Royale with cheese.

Jason(as Red Hood): "Royale with cheese." Know why they call it that?

The Ventriloquist: Uh, because of the the metric system?

Jason(as Red Hood): (smiles at The Ventriloquist) Check out the big brain on The Ventriloquist! You're a smart motherfucker. That's right, the metric system.

The Ventriloquist: [to Red Hood] Look, I'm sorry, I-I didn't get your name. I got yours, uh, Orphan, right? But-But I-I never got your...

Jason(as Red Hood): My name is Pitt, and your ass ain't talking your way outta this shit.

The Ventriloquist: [rising] No, no, no. I just want you to know how – [Red Hood motions him to sit down] I just want you to know how sorry we are that-that things got so fucked up with us and-and Batman. I-I-It...we-we got into this thing with the best intentions. Really. I never...

[Red Hood shoots Scarface, The Ventriloquist recoils in horror]

Jason(as Red Hood): Oh, I'm sorry. Did I break your concentration? I didn't mean to do that. Please, continue. You were sayin' something about "best intentions"? [silence] What's the matter? Oh, y-you were finished? Oh, well, allow me to retort. What does Batman look like?

The Ventriloquist: ..What?

Jason(as Red Hood): [angrily throws the small table in the room] What country are you from!?

The Ventriloquist: Wha-what?

Jason(as Red Hood): "What" ain't no country I ever heard of! They speak English in "What"!?

The Ventriloquist: What?

Jason(as Red Hood): ENGLISH, MOTHERFUCKER! DO YOU SPEAK IT!?

The Ventriloquist: Yes!!

Jason(as Red Hood): THEN YOU KNOW WHAT I’M SAYING!

The Ventriloquist: Yes..!

Jason(as Red Hood): DESCRIBE WHAT BATMAN “LOOKS” LIKE!!!

The Ventriloquist: Wha-what I—?

Jason(as Red Hood): [points gun directly in The Ventriloquist's face] SAY "WHAT" AGAIN! SAY "WHAT" AGAIN! I DARE YOU! I DOUBLE-DARE YOU, MOTHERFUCKER!! SAY "WHAT" ONE MORE GODDAMN TIME!!!!

The Ventriloquist: H-H-He's black...

Jason(as Red Hood): GO ON!

The Ventriloquist: ...He's scary...!

Jason(as Red Hood): Does he look like a bitch?!

The Ventriloquist: What? [Red Hood shoots The Ventriloquist in the shoulder] AGHH!! Anh..!!

Jason(as Red Hood): DOES! HE! LOOK!... LIKE! A BITCH?!?!

The Ventriloquist: NO!!!

Jason(as Red Hood): Then why'd you try to fuck him like a bitch, Wesker?

The Ventriloquist: I didn't...!

Jason(as Red Hood): Yes, you did! YES, you DID, Wesker! You tried to fuck him.

The Ventriloquist: No... no....

Jason(as Red Hood): But Batman don't like to be fucked by anybody except Superman. You read the Bible, Wesker?

The Ventriloquist: [gasping for breath] Yes...!

Jason(as Red Hood): Well, there's this passage I've got memorized, it sorta fits the occasion. Ezekiel 25:17: "The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the iniquities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is He who in the name of charity and good will shepherds the weak through the valley of darkness, for He is truly his brother's keeper and the finder of lost children. [begins pacing about the room] And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy My brothers. And you will know My name is the Lord... [pulls out his gun and aims at The Ventriloquist] ...when I lay My vengeance upon thee."

[The Ventriloquist shrieks in horror as Red Hood shoots him repeatedly]

Condiment King: Oh fuck. I'm fucked. Oh fuck, oh fuck.

Cass(as Orphan): Is he a friend of yours?

Jason(as Red Hood): Hmm? Oh, Orphan, Buddy. Buddy, Orphan.

Cass(as Orphan): Better tell him to shut the fuck up, he's getting on my nerves.

Jason(as Red Hood): Buddy. Buddy. BUDDY! I'd knock that shit off if I was you.

[thenighttrain]

hey!! what’s is hungry jacks is it burger king?

hi! yes it is, it’s the australian burger king

[thegleampt2fromtheglowpt22001]

I saw the post about Burger King and all I can think about is how the answer to whether or not Australia has any Burger King's is literally the 'well yes but actually no' meme because of the fact Burger King had to open up as 'Hungry Jack's' here in Australia but in the long run essentially started doing their own thing (also some Burger King's did open up under the name 'Burger King' in Australia but ended up failing for whatever reason). So yeah, us Australians have some explaining to do.

australia makes no sense, ever

[spudwitch]

Vegan cheeseburger adventures

I put my diet on pause the day before, and the day of, my exam, and have tried the new vegan cheeseburgers at both Grill'd and Hungry Jack's.

The Grill'd one is... Weird. Yes, this is the vegan cheeseburger 2.0 but the texture is still uncanny. Pork-like and flaky. At first it was nice, but the more I ate the weirder it tasted, then by the end I couldn't wait to get the aftertaste out of my mouth. The sauce is delicious however, tastes exactly like bigmac sauce, the cheese was good and melty, and the panini bun was good too.

The Hungry Jack's (that's Burger King to the rest of the world) vegan cheeseburger was better. There's not much taste to it but it's bigger and cheaper and doesn't have a weird confusing flavour. It's 2 of HJ's old veggie patties with vegan cheese and mayo. Good feed for the price.

I would eat both again, the HJ one because it's exactly the thing you would expect given it's HJ, and the Grill'd one any time I felt the need to confuse myself over a meal.

[i-only-care-about-dogs]

Customers suck!

So I work in a fast food industry, and places like McDonald’s amd Hungry Jacks (or Burger King as some of you may know it as) are technically labelled “fast food RESTAURANTS”. So anyway, one really busy day, I had a fair few horrible customers, but one in particular remains in my memory. This elderly man came in with who I assume to be his wife. He picked a burger with ease, decided he wanted it in a meal, amd chose a size and drink for the meal. Not hard, right? But then his wife starts to order. She asks if she can please have a “chicken burger” so I ask her to please specify which one as at the time, there were 9 chicken burgers on the menu. The husband got mad at me though? The wife eventually settled on a burger, so my next question (as part of my job) was “would you like that in a meal”. She says yes, so I asked her what size she would like. She didn’t quite hear me properly, so I politely repeated the question. But yet again, the husband got mad at me and chose a size for the wife. He also ended up choosing her drink for her. My final question for them was “would you like to dine in or take away?” Of course, this is a very sour old man I am dealing with, so his response was “I will not DINE IN, i will EAT IN. You DINE in at a RESTAURANT” and left it at that. Seriously, can people please try not to be such horrible customers. People like me are only trying to do our jobs

[longlivelindanny]

can we have a one shot of Danny being the best boyfriend or husband (your choice) to Linda on her period?

Oh my word, yes! I just finished one, actually

Oh no. Oh crap no. No no no no no!

Linda cursed profusely in her hand as she pushed her sobs in the stroller. How could it do this to her? Why did it do this to her? She usually could feel it, there were usually signs! But she was feeling it all right, which was why she had to get home. Why didn't she bring Danny along?

*******

All the way home, her boys cried. Sean cried because he was tired and hungry, and probably needed a change. Jack cried because they didn't get to see the goats, like Linda had promised, and he was making it abundantly clear he was mad about it.

She had half a mind to spank him, and maybe it'd come down to that, but right now, she just needed to get home.

An agonizing half hour passed of crying children. At the end of the drive, she was just about crying too. She slammed her car door shut as she got Jack, then Sean, out of their car seats. She slammed both their doors, and practically stomped up to the house. She handed the kids to their Dad as soon as she walked in, and went straight up to their bedroom.

Danny had no idea what had happened, but he could deal with that later. Right now, he had to get his sons quiet and calmed down... and maybe even get them to take a nap, so he could look after his wife.

*******

After Jack was calmed down, Danny got him to nap. Sean was changed and had had his bottle, and was now sleeping peacefully. The Dad blew out a breath of relief before heading to the room he shared with his wife.

He found her curled on top of the covers, the sides of it wrapped around her. She had clearly been crying, and he wasn't sure if she was still crying. He kneeled in front of the bed, "What's wrong?"

Linda blinked a few times, her lip wobbling. Gosh, she felt pathetic. "I got my period, and it's bad. It's really bad. I didn't have anything with me, and I couldn't just leave Jack and Sean alone while I fixed it. So I had to rush them home. Jack was throwing a hissy fit because he didn't get to see the stupid goats. And Sean started to cry because Jack was crying. And it was so embarrassing, and I hurt so damn much."

Danny nodded along, showing that he was listening. He stroked her hair the whole time she ranted. "Okay. I'll get you the heat pad, and ice water. Do you want chocolate or anything to snack on?"

She shook her head no.

"I'll be back. And I'll keep an eye on the kids. And figure out dinner."

"You can't cook."

"I'm perfectly capable of putting food on the table." He kissed her nose, "don't worry."

He left and grabbed the heat pad from the closet, then plugged it in for her. He'd have to come back and unplug it if she fell asleep, but that was no big deal. Then he filled a thermos with the coldest ice water and delivered it to her.

"Here you go, baby. Take a nap- I can hold down the fort for a while."

She smiled, "you're the greatest. I love you."

"I love you more," he pushed her hair behind her ear.

"I love you most." She made a kissing sound, signaling him to lean in for a proper kiss.

Once he got his kiss, he perked in on the boys. Both were sleeping soundly, so he went downstairs to figure out dinner.

Sean ate breast milk, so he was taken care of. Jack was pretty picky, but he'd always eat chicken nuggets. Linda probably wouldn't eat much, because she never did on her period. (She could eat like a pig the days leading up to it, but she hardly ate anything on her period). And Danny would eat anything and everything.

That was the easy part. The hard part would be actually cooking the meal. They didn't have enough ingredients for the pastas he knew how to make; they didn't have steak or frozen burgers or even hot dogs.

"Man, we gotta go shopping."

So he picked up the phone, and waited for the person on the other end to answer. "Hello, China King? Do you deliver to Staten Island? You do? Great!"

*******

Just as he suspected, Linda didn't eat much. He'd even go as far to say she didn't eat at all— he didn't count four fork-fills of rice as eating. He, Jack, and Sean, however, ate their dinners.

Afterwards, things were quiet. Jack threw a little fit when Danny said they couldn't play the loud game Jack had wanted. The hissy fit earned him a good spanking and an earlier bedtime. Sean was pretty calm, except for one crying episode, before his own bedtime.

Once both boys were tucked safety in their respective beds, Danny suggested Linda go lie down too. "I'll get things cleaned up down here, and then I'll be up."

"Okay," she responded.

He noted how slow and painful her walk looked. If he could take her pain, he would- he really would. He didn't know what he could do for her. Her periods were supposed to be better now, now that she had two kids. But they weren't. They weren't anything like her periods before kids, but if she was still in pain just sitting still...

Danny sighed as she started to pick up the toys scattered about. He felt kind of weird asking his Mom about what to do, and he felt even weirder asking his Dad. He'd just have to ask Linda in a day or two, when the cramps and the raging hormones calmed down.

He took the stairs two at a time, checked on the kids, and then on his wife. He pushed her hair away- even when she pulled it back to sleep, it still fell in her face.

That's because she moves so much, Danny smiled. "Are you awake?"

"Yes.”

"Is there anything I can do?"

".... Stay with me. And refill my water please."

He left her with a kiss, quickly refilled her water, and got comfortable beneath the covers with her. "Try to relax until Sean wakes up screaming bloody murder."

She laughed (and he chalked it up to a win), "you really are the best. I'm glad I married you."

"Well that works out well, because I'm glad I married you too."

[queenliviaposts]

Uma: yeah why the fuck was you at the Wendy’s drive-through last night

Gil: I was fucking hungry McDonald’s was closed Burger King was closed Jack in the box was closed and Taco Bell was closed so I have to go to the Wendy’s drive-through

Harry: dude you could wait until they opened up is Instead going to the drive-through at 6 o’clock like who does that

CJ: I know I don’t go to the Wendy’s drive-through at 6 o’clock when everybody is asleep I just get my shut eye

Gil: whatever then guess what

Harriet: let me guess they were closed

Gil: yes and then I came back home crying

Frederick: you dumb ass motherfucker

Gil: I know * ouch 🥲 *

[surveysonfleek]

1015.

.:::A:::.. What’s your current Age? 27. i’m old. What’s your favorite type of Animal? dogs. Would you ever join the Army? nope. Are you Available? no. What’s your favorite kind of Apple? red. Are you any good at Art? i’d like to think so but it’s been awhile.

..:::B:::.. Did you ever watch Barney as a kid? yes!! Do you know anyone named Bob? nope. Can you blow a Bubble? yes. Which fast food restaurant has the best Burgers? burger king. What’s your favorite Band? majid jordan.

..:::C:::.. What’s your favorite kind of Cookie? white choc and macadamia. Do you have a Cat? nope. Do you like Country music? no. Are you a Caffeine addict? not at all. Do you think Clowns are at all scary? no unless they’re purposely made up to look scary. ..:::D:::.. What’s your favorite breed of Dog? west highland terrier. What do you usually get at Dunkin Donuts? i never go there. What was your last Dream about? i forgot! i think it was a dream about work. Have you ever been on a Diet? not really, more like watching what i ate. What’s your favorite Dessert? waffles. fresh waffles. ..:::E:::.. Have you ever ridden an Elephant? nope. Eeyore, Piglet or Pooh? eeyore. Do you always give Exact change at a restaurant? nope. ..:::F:::.. Have you ever been on a Ferry? yes. Do you like Ferris wheels? eh, it’s okay. if the view is nice, sure. i just don’t like the idea of being up in the sky too long with no real escape. Who’s your best Friend? my boyfriend. ..:::G:::.. Do you care about your Grades? school is done, but yes i did. Do you prefer Green or red grapes? green. Do you wear Glasses? yes. ..:::H:::.. Who, in your opinion, is the Hottest celebrity? idk. i don’t have celeb crushes anymore. Are you Hungry right now? nope. Why were you last at the Hospital? i forgot. Are you a Health freak? nope. ..:::I:::.. What’s your favorite flavor of Ice cream? rum and raisin. Could you survive without the Internet? haha probably not. i’d have to prepare myself for it. What three things would you want to have while stranded on an Island? a working phone, bedding and a friend. ..:::J:::.. Did you ever own a Jack-in-the-box? nope. Do you like Jell-O? it’s okay. not a huge fan. Do you have a Job? yes. ..:::K:::.. Have you ever been Kayaking? yes haha. Would you ever Kill someone? only in self defence. Do you like Kentucky Fried Chicken? yes! ..:::L:::.. Do you prefer Lemons or Limes? lemons. Is your computer a Laptop or desktop? laptop. Do you do your own Laundry? yes. Do you think Losing someone’s the worst feeling in the world? definitely. ..:::M:::.. What’s your favorite store in the Mall? h&m. What Month were you born in? december. How much Money do you have in the bank? not enough haha. ..:::N:::.. Have you ever had Nilla Wafers? nope. Do you like Nectarines? no. Do you bite your Nails? no. ..:::O:::.. Do you like Onions? sure. What Occupations are you interested in? i don’t even know anymore. i know i need a change though. Do you know where Ontario is located? yes. ..:::P:::.. Do you like the Peanuts? they’re okay. Would you ever Parachute off of a plane? hell no. How old are your Parents? my mum is 53 and my did is 61. ..:::Q:::.. Do you know what a Quail is? yes. If you could ask any celebrity any Question, what would it be? depends on who it is. ..:::R:::.. Do you like the Rain? only if i’m going to sleep and don’t have to leave the house. Do you know anyone named Rachel? yes. Do you like to Read? yes. ..:::S:::.. What’s the best thing about Summertime? summer nights, beach days, traveling. What School do or did you go to? why would i say that lol. ..:::T:::.. Do you like Tennis? nope. Have you ever had surgery on your Teeth? no. ..:::U:::.. What color are your Underwear? white and red. When was the last time you were really Upset? i forgot. ..:::V:::.. Who was your Valentine this year? my boyfriend. Do you own a Vest? at work, yes. ..:::W:::.. If you could have one Wish, what would it be? for my loved ones to be happy, healthy and successful. Do you like the Water? yes. ..:::X:::.. Have you ever seen a Xylophone? yes. Have you ever had an X-ray? yes. ..:::Y:::.. Do you like the color Yellow? sometimes. What did you do Yesterday? took my boyfriend out for his bday. Can you Yo-yo? yes. i can’t do tricks though. ..:::Z:::.. Do a Zebra’s stripes go vertical or horizontal? vertical i think. unless it’s both. What’s your Zodiac sign? sagittarius.

[stone-man-warrior]

December 10, 2020: 3:15 pm:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Strawman_theory

If you are learning about modern day terror pirates, Russian Mother of all Hoaxes and how to zoom around to see in with Cracker Jack Secret Decoder Ring w/Way-Back Machine Attachment, Global Domination Under the Cross, and Crewed Oil, then, you need to know the legend of the Strawman.

You need to go into the Russian Mother Hoax and fly around for this.

There is a Scarecrow from Wizard of Oz, hates fire, won‘t go near a Bar-b-Que, bonfire, or ride a motorcycle without a spark arrrrrestor on it. He says he has no brains. Seems pretty smart to me, knows about fire science.

There is other kinds of Strawman inside the Russian Fractal of Lies.

One is the guy that is said to have access to some guns, if you need a gun, are not willing to go near the gun store, like a bar-b-que and a Scarecrow, then, you go see the Strawman, who is like a Martinizer at a Chinese Laundry, before the Chinaman was killed there, or, like a Amp Guru, can wave a magic wand, put a blessing, there could be some smoke, some guitar players could disappear when that happens. So, Gun Strawman is an important guy in the Russian Fractal Hoax Mother. Multi-Purpose, full service special cleaners, just go get a Big-Gulp, and a straw, at the craps table. “new shooter, comin‘ out!”

Then, there is that other, mysterious Strawman that I linked there.

That, is the Wikipedia Page is the Gnosis Version. It’s all sprinkled with bullshit, lies, deception, is like a treasure map for pirates, has secret messages for guidance in dense fog. There is way too much bullshit at the Wiki, so, we go this other way, towards the secret truth:

I don’t have all of the answers. I have some.

So, you get hauled into a courtroom somewhere, for some reason, could be a parking ticket you have to pay, or, could be car insurance you have to show, or some other small thing where you need to talk to the Courthouse Martinizer Dry Cleaner Amp Guru Power Circuit Mother of all Knowledge friendly Canadian Representative there at the front counter of the County Court House & Shipyard.

There, they show you some paper with your name on it. The reason you went there is explained in a receipt of some paper. The Court Magistrate Martian shows that your name is written in all CAPITAL LETTERS.

HEYSUES Q. CITIZEN

For instance.

“Jesus... is that my name? All Caps?” you say.

“Yes. That is your name. All Caps.” says the Magistrate Docking Clerk.

They explain:

“When you come to the courthouse, and then, after that, forever, you are hereby under Maritime Law, “Three Miles Out to See” they say. Your name is forever to be etched in all capital letters, even when you see it in other ways, it’s still always going to be all capital letters, because you came to the courthouse today, that’s why. So, that means that your name, as a Maritime Courthouse Subject, is henceforth a Strawman, your real ID is always Capitalized, for evermore, and you are under Maritime Law. So, pay your parking ticket at the cash register on the Starboard Side, and show your Auto Insurance Card to the people at the Port Side Shipping Lane as you exit the building”

Basically, that is “The Strawman”. All of that Wikipedia, is bullshit Gnosis they used to keep the truth under the plimsoll, out of view.

3:53 pm.

=============================

4:07 pm:

https://robertkeeley.com/

Bob Keeley. Comes from the email promotions at Hollywood Terror Choir Command HQ.

He is laying down some tracks here, there is some talk about the Strawman right there in that SYNTH-1, second from left.

Let’s have a look.

Let’s see... three areas, grey, blue, red... some knobs, different size ones... two kinds of switches... a BFK in the middle. (”Big Fucking Knife”, is also a Burger King Menu Item, subliminally... “Let’s go get a BFK, I’m hungry!)

The stuff is all arranged there nice and neat, looks cool, I want one.

There is something about those buttons there at the bottom in red... Idunno what it is, but looks kinda weird somehow, ... hmmmmmm... we can figure that out later.

Stuff like that, is often arranged with pleasing to the eye proven means developed by advertising experts long ago, helps to sell products when they look good, and the idea is mostly for the ad that is in the newspaper or catalogue for the products, is called CRAP.

If it looks like CRAP, it’s good, sell it.

C ontrast

R epetition

A lignment

P roximity

CRAP, those are the rules of advertising. Works with warfare too.

So, those other three items are much easier to see the CRAP than the SYNTH-1 is from Bob Keeley, but, the CRAP is there. There is one place where the CRAP is not there, and that is with those two buttons on the bottom in red with the BFK between.

Let’s look at the other parts of the thing first.

Three triangle arranged knobs in a field of grey, with a bigger knob to the upper right in a blue box. Some houses in a neighborhood with a 7-11 on the corner. The houses are tract houses, all the same. The people go to the corner store, get too much good stuff, and a Big Gulp, then go back home.

Those guys on the bottom in red though... they are right there, looks kinda weird, like they are baby sitting the neighborhood.

Maybe that big knob on the corner is the courthouse, and those knobs in the grey are the whole county, all arranged in a triangle of three-ness.

If so, who are the guys in the red zone? They are at the Burger King, have sharp stuff, lots of electronics there, “Wave Generator”, it says. (have you been to the 7th Street BK?. Kiersten Nielson of DHS was killed in defense there. Don’t go there without first understanding all about Bob Keeley.)

Those two buttons in the red area, one is round, port holes are round. That round one is the kind you have to stomp on hard to make it switch, is indestructible, made special for stomping on, has two positions.

That other one, has three positions, is kinda whimpy, easy to roll over, it’s called a Rocker Switch, is rectangle shape, looks like a smart phone video on the vertical setting, sort of, or Picture Window w/three different ways to let the air in, shows waves, air waves, sound waves, electronic current waves, ocean waves, people in the stands at a football game doing “The Wave”... (sorry, fractal decoder glytch happened, too many waves)

The red is below the Plimsoll.

Ok, now we have some sheets to the wind in the Fractal Viewer.

Bob Fuller, Fulltone. He makes stuff that is absolutely indestructible. There is no junk at the Fultone shop, it’s all built like a battleship. Robert Fuller is that round button in red.

Even looks like a battleship at the Fulltone shop, Venice/Santa Monica area of the Pacific Coast.

https://www.fulltone.com/

You need to go there, take a ride in a stealth dingy around there, quietly, Bob’s have the best electronics, swords, RADAR, SONAR, and the took over Raytheon in Colorado a long time ago, so, they have more and better equipment than does the US Military there, I am not exaggerating. The people from that part of the Russian Hoax Fractal Mother invented Raytheon, way back in the early 1970′s when Raytheon was just a maker of SONAR fish finders for fishermen, and somehow that invention was souled to the US Defense Department, probobly when Ronnie Reagan (Raygun) became US President, he was SAG President at the time he was “Elected”.

Conclusion:

The SYNTH-1 is a Aircraft Carrier, the three knobs in grey are Flying V’s on the flight deck. That other bigger knob in blue is the Flight Control Tower. Those buttons on the bottom in red, are distributing Chum into the water. The Chum is the US Navy after those two Bob’s w/BFK got to them.

Those other three items in the Keeley ad are supporting members for the shipping and warfare concert, are like USO shows featuring Bob Hope aboard ship for entertaining the US Crew during war-time.

The brought with them:

Pretty Girls

Coffee Maker

Ammonium nitrite

Lots of electronic equipment, cameras, recording gear, boxes to carry all of that, helicopters were provided for transportation to and from the boats.

The Bob Hope Traveling US Takeover Show was given special protective crew assigned to them for USO shows.

This part of the Fractal Hoax of Russian Lies is deep.

It goes to HWY 111 in Palm Springs to a house with a pool that is also a fish aquarium for big fish in the California desert. More available w/personal interview please from nsa or other Global Security persons.

NOT FOR HIRE. FOR FREE.

5:17 pm.

========================================

5:35 pm:

I have some glue for sticking together puzzle parts from Burger King to Dairy Queen, it’s Royal Glue, very expensive HMS Glue.

You go inside either of those two places, and the same condition can be seen.

Walk through the door, look to the left. There are some booths there by the big window. One of the most central of those booths, at either place, is going to have some stuff on the table, but there is no one there, just some personal items on a table.

no matter who you are, that is going to be your stuff after they kill you there. Part of the set-up is some personal items on a table at the Royal Take-Away.

I have seen many ways that stuff is arranged and used. There are too many ways, and can always change to suit the HMS Hamburger.

At Burger King, the items are almost always electronic items, a computer lap-top opened up and running is there on the table, maybe some reading glasses, and a smart phone on a small stand like a little tiny tripod for smart phone video conference is there on that table. You go in, make your order, there is always confusion, they don’t hear what you said, explain you can have super size, or something for free, or some problem is happening with the Burger King Order Taker’s Electronic Headset, one that has three blinking lights on the wrap-around microphone part, red, green, more red color lights on it, all blinking near that representatives mouth. That is when two thugs come into the store there, as you are mesmerized by the blinking lights, and are confused about why is the order taker talking to the people in the Drive Through when you are inside the store at the front counter.

The people who came in behind are releasing a lot of nitrous gas, you see them, hear that that are talking about you as if they know who you are, and they call you by name like a old friend just happened to come in there as you are ordering. That’s when the front counter person w/blinking mouthpiece shoots the .25 custom made gun. The people behind who say they know you, are there to offer some “help” first aid in the parking where there is a Pontiac Catalina 1968 V-8 400 Big Block 4 door waiting.

That is when all of that stuff on the table is going to be your stuff. no one knows what the heck is on that hard drive or in that phone, as you disappear into the parking with your new friends.

Same thing at Dairy Queen. The difference is that the items are not electronics on the table, it’s a motorcycle helmet, and there is a Green Harley Davidson out front, has a Tractor Seat Saddle, is for a “Loaner”, no room for female on the Bitch Seat at the Dairy Queen.

I don‘t go to the Dairy Queen very often, just enough to pick up some Royal HMS Glue to put hear in noble size globs.

I do know more about the Burger King though, sometimes, I just go there knowing that someone has to do some national security, so, I go there, to do that... all I need to do, is light a Bic Lighter, then go home and have a Whopper.

Please send help.

Please send US Military.

Bring your own Hospital

Please send some medical services to Oregon.

no help has come. There are no signs of helpful people to be found anywhere.

=============================

6:31 pm:

By the way, the Department of Motor Vehicle Attack Scenario is still open ended, has not matured or come to fruition as of today, but there is still much time for that, and, I’m reminded of the DMV and it’s Big Sister, DOT, every time I need to go somewhere.

Reminder: I renewed my vehicle registration tags online at the DMV renewal web page about two months ago, they sent a piece of 8.5 x 11 inch paper with some vehicle information on it, and instructions about where to stick it, on the car, with some tape.

There are no provisions for tinted windows, so, that is part of the “Custom Tailoring Penguin Tuxedo” terror. I have a no provisions car, came that way from the Russian Hoax Fractal Factory when they killed my mom in 2010.

The information, as you may recall, is that the DMV ran out of proper, license plate tags, and, they explain, the paper is to be applied to the car per instructions, there is a expiration date for the replacement temporary paper that is different from the exportation date of the tags that I paid more than $100 for, but did not get yet. The expiration date difference can be Fractal RUsian Hoax Mother Zoomed over to the Covfefe Trump terror, when “Fe - Fe = 0 Fe”, and the 0 is silent. Bad news to see that on there like that. It’s presidential Terror Comm, where the “math makes a difference”, and is “silent but deadly” because that is the goal of DOT, “dead motorists can‘t make exhaust noise”.

The set-up includes Fractal Russian Hoax for making bait to lure and capture some real police, who were told that I drive a pick-up truck with no tags on it. The thing about that, is that I do have a truck but am not using that as of this writing, and for quite some time, but can only afford to insure one vehicle at a time. Sometimes, I insure and drive the truck, sometimes a car. The registration for both, I always keep fresh with online registration because there is no way to survive a physical visit to the DMV anymore, and there are special dead-lines for using online registration, so, I just pay registration for both online all of the time so that I won‘t have to become V-8 at the DMV because of the dead-line for waiting too long made me have to go in person there to the DMV.

The tags come in the mail, if they don‘t run out of them, but, I don’t put the tags on the vehicle that I am not insuring to help keep the Three Boys Towing terror away, they steal registered licensed cars & trucks first, then the expired tags ones later on after the all of the registered ones all are stolen first. It’s like they do with the killing the disabled and elderly people first, because those people have some things like Social Security income and Medicare insurance that is useful to the terror army right away. The income and Medicare is like a fresh set of tags on a good car like that, just get in and drive it like you stole it.

But, the tags are tucked safely away, in a complicated filing system I use for terror information, very complex and sophisticated system.

So, real police are told that I sold the truck tags to someone else, just because they are paid for, but are not on the truck. It’s not insured, can‘t afford to insure both, so, that’s why, foools.

now, they are waiting to see if I am going to put the truck tags, that some think I sold and don‘t have, onto the car, because that paper replacement “Stick it where?” thing came for the car, and looks fake.

If I call DMV, the message recording always says the wait time is about 45 minutes for someone to answer, they are experiencing heavy call volumes, they say. That wait time is more time than a phone battery will last, so, you have to stay tethered to a battery charger for that call, if you want to ask about when the real tags might be sent to the house, so that I could  be ready to get them from the mailbox before Clyde Baum does. He is famous for stealing my mail, and has a lot of expensive stolen cars & trucks that all need fresh registration tags so he can drive them.

I don‘t have my tags yet. They ran out of tags at the DMV.

Meanwhile, the DOT with help from a armada of HMS Eleanor Rigby Pirates from l O Downing Street are murdering many hundreds of thousands of US Citizens while the real police are chasing around some tags and worried about if I drive a pick-up truck or a passenger car.

7:02 pm.

================

Reminder:

Google is a major part of the Global terror take-over. They have all of the very best computer engineers. Many of the engineers are kidnapped people who have the kinds of skills that the Vatican needs, so, they are chained up to a server in Hillary Clinton‘s basement, or equivalent, and, they have taken this account, all 750 or something like that, entries here, and made a searchable database of the information, all is cross-referenced to pertinent other information contained within here, and, also, is cross referenced to a Russian Mother Hoax Version of lies that were already told about the existence of this account, to help them keep the lies all in a line that is workable for making more lies and capturing federal officers at the same time.

As I said before, those officers also need to make a similar searchable database from the raw information that this account contains. But first, you are going to need some computer engineers, those guys are like what happened at nasa to the rocket scientists, they were tracked down, captured, and are at Space X and Space Force terror cells now, in Hillary’s Server network. So go find some of them, to make a database, searchable, like Google already did.

That bearded freind over at the Monroe’s I have been reporting a little bit about, is a Google Computer Engineer from Bad Guy Auto at Three Pines & Russell roads, so, they are like Johnny on the Spot when I write new entries.

Also, Gnosis sometimes is a giant DELETE button.

Don’t discard or discount the truth, that Google+ was a social media platform of many millions of peoples accounts. The whole fucking thing was completely erased just because of what I had written down there at the time.

Google+ was Deleted because of the truth I wrote threatens not only the existance of Google, but threatens the existance of Great Britain and the Vatican if the information were used to stop the terror those people are advancing towards Global Domination and complete and utter control of everyone and everything that will remain on earth after they are done with the Cleansing part of the slaughter.

Google+ deleted all of the information contained within many millions of accounts. I am sure there was much eye-witness of terror written down besides :mine.

8:42 pm.

[queennicoleinboots]

Taco Mac with Colonel Mac, part 2

Getting to Publix was a feat. After Colonel Mac got his van fixed several hours later and after I put the groceries in his house and came back, we fought the never-ending rush of traffic on I-78. Interstate 78 can fuck off. Where are these cars coming from, and why the fuck are they always here? I swear these same mother fuckers are getting paid by the Logantown government to ride around in the same loop 24 hours a day, seven days a week just to piss off anyone trying to accomplish anything on the road ever. That's where our tax dollars are going. Holy fuck I hate this place.

So after about 10 minutes of praying that traffic would go the fuck away for about point ten seconds, traffic finally subsided and the green light allowed us to leave that god-forsaken intersection right across from Burger King. That was the same Burger King where there was a drug deal going on in the middle of the parking lot. At the time, I didn't know about it because I was riding with my eyes closed and ranting about a bunch of bullshit. Colonel Mac let me know about it by literally saying "DUCK, YOU SUCKER! WE GON'GET SHOT!" Thank God we ducked.

Anyway, traffic was razzle dazzle bullshit as usual on the way to Publix for no fucking reason. A couple circus performers cut us off before we reached the parking lot. And of course we hit every red light.

We parked our vans incorrectly because we were disgruntled and rebellious. Colonel Mac also needed to use the right side of his van for his lift.

We entered the store and were looking for red meat, onions, and cheese. It took forever because half of the meat at Publix was rotted. We ended up buying ground sirloin and being done with it. I wish we had time to go to Aldi to find better meat... but car problems fucked that up. Oh well. I don't care to figure it out.

We calmly went and picked out Sargentos Taco blend cheese, Boar's Head white American cheese, and a pack of Publix pepper jack cheese.

"I want to feel the Taco Mac in the morning!" Colonel Mac said as he grabbed another pack of pepper jack cheese.

"Please. I would add jalapenos to mine," I said as I continued to shop.

We strolled all the way down to the produce aisle and saw Michael the Great Arc Angel searching for decent onions... this is going to be bad.

"Why is half of the produce rotten?!" a random Karen who was wearing a mask asked in a nasally voice.

"Because you don't eat enough fruits and vegetables!" another Karen who looked like Barbie from the 1990s shouted as she grabbed a carrot Naked smoothie from the refrigerator. She, of course, was also wearing a mask.

Colonel Mac blinked and spun around in a circle before speaking an aside to me, "She grabbed a smoothie. She can afford that? Da fuq is wrong with her?"

"So everything's my fault! Excuse me, Princess!!!" the other Karen shouted in a nasally voice.

A group of Karens with face masks on started fondling the produce to find the perfect fruits and vegetables. They were talking about country clubs, getting hair cuts, and how it was an injustice that spas weren't open during a pandemic.

Michael the Great Arc Angel had had enough of the Karens and yelled, "SILENCE!!!!" before the whole store shook. "I'm trying to find the perfect onion!"

"What are you making?" Colonel Mac asked.

"Taco Mac, of course. It's all the rage!!!!" Michael The Great Arc Angel shouted.

"We're making that, too!" Colonel Mac shouted.

"Of course! Taco Mac! With Colonel Mac!!!" Michael the Great Arc Angel shouted.

The cast of PeeWee Herman appeared in the store and started shouting. "Taco Mac with Colonel Mac" was still the phrase of the month.

"Oh my God! Can we shop without the cast of PeeWee Herman screaming, please?" the Karen with a nasally voice asked.

"NO! In fact, you have offended me for the last time! You fondling the fruits and vegetables and putting them back in the same spot instead of setting them aside is an injustice! The spa shall be closed. It is justice. You are unjust! You are the same people I argue with on a regular basis about taxes and municipal regulations! BE GONE!" Michael the Great Arc Angel commanded as he started throwing the rotted vegetables and fruits at the Karens.

"Here we go again," Colonel Mac said as he chuckled.

Paul the Goat charged into Publix and bleated with authority before he was examining the fruit and vegetables and joining Michael the Great Arc Angel in throwing the rotted ones at the Karens.

The Karen with a nasally voice shrieked and turned into a pterodactyl. She flew around the store and hooked onto her grocery cart to continue shopping.

My phone rang. It was Joebear.

"BAEWHUHH!!!!!!" I shouted into my phone. Paul the Goat threw an onion at me that was okay minus the skin. The skin of the onions at Publix always look fucked up.

"What?!" Joebear shouted in the phone.

"BAEWHUHH!!!!!" I sang again. Paul the Goat threw a jalapeno at me. It was okay, so I put it in the cart. I am a Karen, too.

"Thank you. Can we go?" Colonel Mac asked.

Michael the Great Arc Angel laughed in triumph as he found the perfect onion and flew to the check-out. He even cut off a Karen.

Paul the Goat was still throwing less-than-perfect fruits and vegetables at Karens. Karens were checking out at the store and wondering why they were forced to help with produce quality control. They bitched (rightfully so) about the managers not doing their jobs. They were covered with rotted fruit guts.

"They couldn't deal with it anymore," Joebear said.

The Grinch was hobbling toward produce and making guttural noises. Apparently, he was still hungry for rotten produce.

"Excuse me, sir. You have to pay for that!" a produce manager who also looked like a Karen shouted.

The Grinch sputtered gibberish to her before he said, "Can you hire me for QUALITY CONTROL?! Your rotted vegetables are all I require."

"All right. All right. You have the job!" the Karen produce manager said.

"Deja vu," Colonel Mac said before he headed for the check-out.

After sitting six feet behind a Karen who was yapping about how ridiculous it was that social distancing was important, Colonel Mac then freaked out, spun in a circle, and said, "Holy Shit I forgot butter!" He got the fuck out of the line. Naturally, I followed him.

When we got to the butter aisle, he grabbed the Blue Bonnet chemical lard before I slammed the freezer door shut, stared him down, and asked, "What the fuck are you doing?"

"Getting butter???" he said as he looked at me in fright.

I snatched the Blue Bonnet chemical death from him and said, "This is not butter. Let me read the ingredients..."

Colonel Mac blinked at me.

I started to read the Blue Bonnet ingredients. "Water, Soybean Oil a.k.a estrogen. You know that soy is estrogen, right?"

"Really? I thought it was basically a plant substitute for meat," Colonel Mac said.

"Yes, but it is estrogen. Estrogen is a female hormone. You are a man. You don't need estrogen, NEXT! Palm Oil, Palm Kernel Oil, salt, less than two percent of emulsifiers (mono- and diglycerides - SUGAR complexes. Mono means one. Di means two. Glyceride means sugar," I rambled.

Colonel Mac stared at me with an "Okay, I got your point" smile.

I kept reading, "Soy Lechitin - more estrogen." I couldn't pronounce the next ingredient on the list. It was Propylene Glycol Monostearate).

"Yes, yes..." Colonel Mac said.

"UGH WHAT IS THIS CRAP?!" Joebear yelled over the phone.

"It's bullshit. That's what I'm telling Colonel Mac, baewhuhh," I said.

Colonel Mac spun around in his wheelchair out of exasperation.

"Preservatives (Sodium Benzoate, Potassium Sorbate, Calcium Disodium EDTA), Whey, Citric Acid, Natural and Artificial Flavors, Vitamin A Palmitate, and Beta Carotene for color," I finished reading the ingredients. "In other words, it's garbage! Literal radioactive toxic waste!!!"

"All right. All right," Colonel Mac said.

"So what you should buy instead is either Kerrygold Butter or even Kroger... or Publix brand actual butter. Let me read the ingredients of the Greenwise actual butter," I said as I picked up the package and read. "Pausterized organic sweet cream (from actual milk) and salt. In other words, no bullshit."

The Grinch came over and took the Blue Bonnet margarine. He then devoured it and started to grow.

"HOLY SHIT! THAT'S WHAT I WAS EATING?!" Colonel Mac said as he took the grocery cart and rode away as quickly as he could. I laughed and walked with Colonel Mac as I watched the Grinch grow to the ceiling. He then burped a burp that smelled like rotted teeth and cat turds.

The other shoppers and Karen's screamed and paid for their groceries rapidly while of course trying to keep a six-foot distance from each other.

"KEEP THE CHANGE!" Lou Who from the Grinch movie (2000) yelled as he took his half-bagged groceries and ran out of the store.

"REMEMBER TO WEAR A MASK AND KEEP SIX FEET AWAY FROM EACH OTHER. Practice social distancing!" The Grinch commanded before he laughed and continued to terrorize us all.

Colonel Mac and I checked out and paid for our groceries. As soon as we left the store, we burst out laughing. We were at our wits' end with all of the stupidity that occurred at that point. But unfortunately, that wasn't the end of it.

Peter was fucking his therapist on the hood of their car (the bitch gave it to him for $1. Bitch bitch bitch bitch...) when Colonel Mac and I finally got out of this stupidly expensive fucking grocery store from Hell. The best thing would this grocery shopping trip would be if Peter squirted in her and got her fat and pregnant. They'd have beautiful babies.

Publix sucks. Oh well, at least we finally get to make those damn tacos.