#yes i had to do emojis i regret nothing lol
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a-libra-writes · 2 years ago
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hello friend, is it alright if i request short headcanons about childhood friends to lovers with margaery and/or sansa? I need more sansa and margaery content, their tags are dead silent 😭😭😔. I hope this is okay and hope you have a good day/night.
Sapphic friends to lovers ................ my weakness ........ okay you didnt specify if it was so I assumed, LOL. This is more childhood crushes n' friendships cause its cute, damn it.
(((also im including my favorite dornish ladies bc i can)))
🐺Sansa Stark🐺
You, Sansa and Jeyne become "the little ladies" of Winterfell, a close trio of friends who are often together. While Sansa seems to be the leader, she very much looks to you for guidance, even if you're younger. She's often hung on your opinion and thoughts, and if you did the same for her, you both would be talking in circles about what to do before Jeyne would interrupt and suggest a third thing, lest you two talk all day.
Sansa starts to admire things you fancy, even if she doesn't always understand why you like them - say for example, swords or bugs. She admires you, too, though that's obvious, and she's childishly delighted when you agree with her thoughts. When old nan tells stories about knights and princesses, in Sansa's mind, the knights always seem to have eyes like your's.
And while Sansa often daydreams about being a married Lady, just like her mother, sometimes a worry interrupts her thoughts. Won't you need to be married too? Doesn't that mean you'll have to go away? No, no, it's fine, you'll just visit and write to her. Sansa makes you promise to do so several times.
If you're of a much lesser rank than her, she's heartened by the thought of you being her handmaiden instead. Proper ladies need proper handmaidens, after all. Then you two wouldn't have to part at all! Whenever she's expressed these worries to her mother, Catlyn gently tells Sansa that it's just the way of things, and she'll find new companions and friends in her future husband's house. Sansa retorts she doesn't want new ones, she wants you.
Sansa likes to fuss about with your clothes and hair, just like her mother fusses with her's. If you aren't a girly type or appreciate touching, this can be exhausting. More than once you two have bickered because she wants to keep trying different hairstyles and you want to do something else. Jeyne or even Arya are the ones who interrupt it.
Speaking of Arya, if you're the type of little lady whose closer in personality and temperament, she's quite fond of you. Sansa can't help but feel jealous, even if she knows it's silly. And when she scolds Arya for something unladylike, and Arya retorts "but YN does it!", Sansa just huffs. "That's different!" "How is it different?" "It - it just is!"
Sansa would also pout if you play with the boys instead of her, especially if you're a little older. She very carefully walk through the mud in the sword yard or brave the high parts of Winterfell's walls where you're hanging about with Robb, Jon and Theon. She wants to remind you it isn't proper, but then you might send her away, so she just huffs and deals with it. If she's feeling clever, she'll claim she needs you for something right this minute and drag you off.
(The boys notice this behavior and think it's pretty funny. Robb knows all he has to do is tease you and Sansa will RUSH over to your defense)
Naturally, you're going with Sansa when she has to leave for King's Landing. It'll be so wonderful! She has so many fancies of being a Queen and you her handmaiden, and that means you can always stay by her side. And apart from that, there will be so many amazing things to see and do. She can hardly keep still at the thought, and spills it all you to, hoping you'll agree. Arya thinks her sister will be too preoccupied with you to care about princes or knights, but she's just fine with that. Better you than that awful prince and his dog.
🏵Margaery Tyrell🏵
She knew you were different from the start. Margaery has always had an endless stream of companions, from her cousins to the daughters of her mother's handmaidens. There was something so different about you though, and she just couldn't put her finger on it.
Being a charming little girl, it wasn't hard for Margaery to find out about you from the servants and other cousins. What you liked, where you were from, what your parents are like, and so on. Maybe if she shows an interest in these things, you'll be more inclined to play with her.
(You both being children, it really doesn't take much for you to want to play with her. Margaery forgets about using her gathered facts and just has fun).
Hanging out with her means playing with allll her cousins and companions too. Huge games of chase in the gardens, elaborate and dramatic plays, big tea parties with over-dressed dolls. The consistent thing is you're always Margaery's "pick" - you sit next to her, you play the knight if she's the princess, your doll is the sister of her doll so they can't be separated. Even in competitive games, she's more likely to team up with you than play against you. There's been more than a few girls who complained of you being the favorite, which Margaery doesn't deny.
If you're the sort of girl who prefers playing swords and being outside, Margaery adapts to that. She'll drag Loras along (he'll never turn down a mock sword fight), and sometimes he sneaks training swords out of the armory. Sometimes you're the villain who steals Margaery away, and Loras is the knight getting her back. Sometimes she demands you two switch roles 'so YN can keep me this time!'. You end up close to Loras, too.
She's used to being made much of by servants and companions alike, but no praise holds as much weight as your's, except maybe her mother's. She can become quite prideful if you're always praising her virtues and admiring her. Margaery is much the same with you, and she's always been physically affectionate. She likes holding hands, doing your hair, hugging and sharing a bed (though that's usually joined by a baby cousin or two). Highgarden is positively charmed by its little Lady Tyrell and her companion.
(Lady Olenna has notes you two are remarkably close, and that could probe useful in the future. She'd invite you two to her little private parties, often posing unusual riddles and questions to you.)
Being accomodating and considerate, Margaery is easy to get along with regardless if you're more social or more introverted. Being the former makes it easier to attend parties with her, and the latter means she'll be more understanding than most if you don't want to attend the endless feasts and social gatherings. She'll miss you, but she's delighted to be the exception - you may be sick of everyone else, but you'll let her stay (quietly) while you decompress. She'd be disappointed to be sent away, though she perks right up once you want to talk again.
Margaery figures she has some kind of crush as she gets older. Her other companions talk about boys in the same way she thinks about you. Margaery isn't opposed to boys, but she finds girls just as interesting, and you're the most interesting of all. She'd be a little hurt if you were chasing after some boy cousin of her's, or picked another girl over her. It takes her some time to formulate these thoughts and feelings. She has a gut feeling these aren't things you normally think if someone is just a friend. When she hears a wonderful love song one evening - one she's heard many times before, yet just now has it struck her - she begins to understand her feelings.
As she grows older, she underatands you can't truly be with her forever and ever. ... or could you? Important married ladies still get to have handmaidens. Would it trouble you to stay at her side? Would you rather have your own husband and family? These thoughts often bother Margaery. She goes to her grandmother with her troubles, and Lady Olenna is certainly inclined to help her favorite ...
⭐️Ashara Dayne⭐️
Though the Daynes were well-liked amongst the nobility of down, House Starfall was a quiet place. Ashara was a quiet girl, content to observe her more outgoing brother and parents visit with guests. Her parents felt a female companion might do her well, and Ashara was open to the idea. She liked playing with the many noble girls when they visited Sunspear, and there wasn't much in the way of playmates in Starfall. Most of the servant's children were too young or too old, or boys, which her father forbade.
Her big, purple eyes took you in when you arrived. She was a little distant at first, wanting to observe you first, but she was never impolite or cold. Regardless if your personality was more on her wavelength or a total opposite, she's amused by your habits and interests.
Sometimes you two will play long and imaginative games, sometimes you read something together in silence. Ashara likes it when you talk about something you're very passionate about, and you can draw similar conversation out of her. While she was never a shy child, her parents are pleased she's becoming more willing to talk to others. Sometimes she just gazes at you, and when you ask her what she's thinking of, she only shrugs. "Only you." Ashara often says odd things like that.
Being friends with Ashara means you're around Arthur a lot, in spite of the age gap. He's always kind and gracious to you, very "knightly" even. Many servants think you two will be trouble later on, but Arthur just sees you as a second sister. Many times he's thanked you for being Ashara's friend, and asks you to look after her safety.
She's not very affectionate, even with her brother, but she enjoys holding your hand and brushing your hair in the evening. During loud feasts and parties, she likes to take your arm and keep close so you don't lose each other.
Going to Sunspear is already exciting, and Ashara is the one introducing you to all the Martell cousins and other children, both highborn and lowborn. The both of you quickly make a trio with Princess Elia. You're either of similar temperment to the steady girls, or you're encouraging them to run about and play more. The three of you like to go off to your own games and little world, and this bond only strengthens each time you visit.
It might be Elia who helps Ashara put words to her feelings, once she's older and seriously thinking of them. Arthur has his two cents as well; gently warning his sister that you may not be with her forever. She hates to think of that, though she knows it's true. She's content to keep these feelings to herself. It would almost be worse if you felt the same, because then you'd both have to deal with the separation. Ashara hopes you don't think ill of her for wanting to stay quiet.
Reprieve comes in the form of the newly married Elia. As the future queen, she's expected to have handmaidens, and of course she'll want her childhood friends to accompany her. Her brothers Doran and Oberyn make it clear they only trust you and Ashara, anyway. Now you can have many precious years with Ashara, and not have to worry about marriages. For a while, anyway.
☀️Arianne Martell☀️
It's like you were meant to be her dearest friend. Your father was good friends with Doran Martell, so it only seemed natural that their daughters should be each other's companions. Arianne almost can't remember you not being there. You've always been a constant in her life, and you were different from her other companions or the Sand Snakes she considered sisters.
You two are notorious in Sunspear for your mischief, wether it's Arianne dragging you into it or you're just as bad. Prince Doran takes it in stride, as it's never truly malicious, and Uncle Oberyn only encourages it. Several times Doran has scolded you girls for being so mischevious to guests you dislike. Arianne gets most of the scolding - she's the eldest, and his heir, she ought to know better ... she never turns the blame on you, just teases that you owe her for covering for you.
There's always companions and cousins to play with, but you're second to none. Arianne makes this clear with her words and actions. You're to sit by her and hold her hand and are chosen first for her games. If you're competing with another child, Arianne is rooting for you and maybe helping you cheat.
She was your first kiss, too. It's when you were playing hide and seek around the vast orchards. Arianne found you, and gave you a quick kiss rather than saying "you're it!". Later she claimed it was to confuse you so she'd have more time to run, but maybe that wasn't the whole reason. When you bring it up years later as adults, she's both embarrassed at her childishness and a bit proud.
The downside to being her favorite is the jealousy. Not from the others - that's easy to deal with - it's if you're playing with someone else, especially a girl. More than once you and Arianne have gotten into arguments because she felt ignored. The little fight only lasts a few hours before you both make up, and Arianne is better about it once she's older.
Much of the jealousy stems from her being aware of her feelings early on. She knows they aren't feelings one has for a friend. Arianne is open about how she finds you the loveliest and the best, and she loves receiving the same praise in kind, but she wonders if you have the same feelings. She isn't ashamed of them, she knows girls can feel that way about girls - but she also knows only boys and girls can marry. It gives her much to think about.
She doesn't think about it long. Once she's Princess of Dorne, you can always stay by her side! Problem solved. She pitches the idea throughout your childhood. You'll never have to worry about a thing, she'll make sure of it. You both will always have the best gowns and go to the best parties and never have to part. It'll be like a dream.
Prince Doran is more than happy you and Arianne get along so well - you end up being like another daughter to him - he does often worry about her attachment. She can't expect you to always be there, and she doesn't want to listen to any talk of you leaving. Well, he figures she might see reason once she's grown ...
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6okuto · 8 months ago
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Hi, I really love your headcanons for Touchstarved, they’re so great!! If it hasn’t been requested yet, may I please request Leander falling in love headcanons?
LEANDER FALLING IN LOVE
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gn!reader | thank u!!!! \o/ es leander time :-]
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don't know how to describe this. for ais + vere + kuras, romantic feelings develop somewhere in the process (ais and vere generally love being little shits so they could've liked you from the start.) but for leander, it's clear he's kinda into you from the beginning. LOL
this doesn't necessarily mean the relationship will develop super fast! leander pays attention and keeps a pace you're comfortable with, though he doesn't shy away from your flirtations (might be surprised, but then he'll smile/laugh and flirt back) or physical touch if you go for it. he loves it even!
one moment is him wooing you with magic...again... another flower! multiple, even! little fireworks! stars! a trail of flickering lights where you find him waiting for you at the end! you can show you're genuinely touched or tease him about it (is a lot of your job doing little magic shows? / is a flower the best you can do?) and he says he'll do something even bigger next time
another moment might be you taking charge in some way. telling him to back down/up, defending him, asking to take the lead for one of your adventures. it isn't often that leander's offered the option to be anything but a leader, much less told not to be. he offers advice but generally follows your lead, and is it weird for him to say that it was really attractive when you told that guy to pay attention to you, not him?
it all just seems too good to be true, he's too good to be true. so you're wary, even if you do really really want to get close or kiss him etc etc. and leander can tell, of course, so he'll just keep trying to prove himself to you
there has to be a moment where you find out how and why he does things for free—why he's the renowned leader of the Bloodhounds. that's not for me to figure out though! i am not a theorist [heart emoji]
But :3 I will offer :3 leander protecting his people above ground isn't a rare sight. leander getting super ticked off or cold is. he's all but mastered his charm and negotiations, until you're involved, and the bloodhound leader might resemble his rumors more in that moment :3c
he doesn't really run from his feelings? he knows he likes you, and that you like him too, so he doesn't see a reason to beat around the bush there. the problems lie with his gang business and possible necromancy if the theories are true, so we'll have to see about. That because there could definitely be some kind of fight or confrontation between you two depending on what he's doing
but anyway. when the time finally comes, he tells you being with him will put a target on your back, but he promises to protect you, even more so than he has been.
plus! he hasn't taken you on a proper date yet! you didn't think hanging out at the bar or looking for books or sneaking into buildings was the best he could do, did you?
! having a hard time choosing how everyone finds out he has a partner now. he could make an announcement at the wet wick if you're comfortable with it, making your spot in the gang official. it could be that people were already gossiping/betting on when it happens, and when he kisses your temple at the bar someone sees and cheers. it's really up to you! i think he's happy with whatever you'd like :3
so! leander's into you. when does he realize he's In Love with you
because i don't think he really had a Serious Relationship in his plans LOL. and that's nothing against you!! he regrets nothing!! it's just... there's things to figure out, priorities to be made, long term plans that have to be accounted for
i'm kind of imagining like. an oh shit moment. he may not say that but the emotional impact is that level
yes he was always interested in you, but it's obviously getting more serious, because he's thinking of the mundane? if that makes sense. like it isn't just that he likes holding your hand or kissing you, it's that he imagines it when he's tired and uses the thought of seeing you again as comfort. it isn't just that he'd love to wow you and take you on a date, it's that he's wondering if you'd mind going on some errands with him. he's fitting you into every area of his life in his head rather than trying to keep you separate
and at some point it just clicks in leander's head.
he can be the one to say it first! might even be the same day he realizes. you're taking a nap and he says "i love you," just to try it out. it feels a little weird but not unwelcome, and now he has to figure out when to say it while you're conscious LOL
if you say it he [ ! ] [ :) ]. maybe sighs and makes a joke about you beating him to it, but says it back sincerely :3
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amtrak12 · 5 months ago
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I left 300+ comments on fics in 3 days
So the Seasons of Drabbles fic exchange just wrapped up its summer round, and I had a blast with it! I plan on making a wrap-up post about my experience as both a writer and a reader, but first I want to talk about how I read and commented on 338 drabbles (aka everything posted as of the day authors were revealed) in one weekend. 👀
Why
First of all, why the fuck did I read and comment on sooooo many drabbles? For multiple reasons:
I haven't received many comments on my most recent fic updates which has left me pretty bummed out
If I'm going to claim "Even a simple heart emoji goes a long way!" then I should practice what I preach
I was so excited/impatient for fic reveals that I skimmed through past rounds for fandoms I like and found a fic that didn't have any comments even 5 months later, not even from the giftee :(
So yeah, I was determined that every single fic posted to the summer round was getting a heart emoji and a kudos from me BARE MINIMUM! And if I'm kudos-ing and commenting, then I might as well read the fic too. What if it's really good? What if it's really sad and a heart emoji doesn't fit the tone? I need to know these things!
Methodology
I made a game plan. My baseline comment was a purple heart 💜 because that's my go to color. If I found something to quote, I quoted it. If it was angsty (or seemed angsty), I might do an 'Ooph!' before the heart, or even a broken heart emoji paired with a 'Good job!'. If someone did a series of drabbles and split the drabbles up into their own chapters, I switched up the color of the hearts for each chapter -- and yes I did comment on each chapter! As an author, I LOVE when I get comments along the way and not just at the end. And as a reader, it gave me extra space to quote or add commentary, if I had it (and sometimes I did!). Commenting on every chapter is 👍👍👍 Do recommend.
But did I actually READ every single one of these fics, you ask? Yes. Like 99% of them. There were a couple where I knew enough about the fandom to know I wanted nothing to do with that or where the series of drabbles was so long, that I was like "oh bestie, I can't do it. I'm so sorry :(" But I still skimmed those enough to grasp the tone of the fic so I could modify my heart emoji comment as needed.
Results
OMG it was so frickin fun! I mean, did my eyes start to bleed? Did I have to take breaks from reading because I caught myself skimming too much? Yes, of course. IT WAS 338 DRABBLES IN THREE DAYS! And not all of them were 100-300 words long. Some of those were 1-2k words! I should've taken more breaks than I did, but I really wanted to get all/the majority done before author reveals for arbitrary reasons only my brain knows (it won't even tell me you guys 😜) But even still, it was super super fun to see the huge variety of fics out there!
It's also been a blast to see the author replies roll in. Some replied before author reveals so they still showed anonymous. Most waited until after the reveals and I got to learn that WHOA, so-and-so wrote like 7 of those drabbles! *applauds* Sometimes they replied with a thank you, sometimes it was their own preferred heart emoji. It's so cute seeing how other people like to say thank you, because I know I've definitely settled into a 'style' when I reply to comments on my fics. 💜
Would I do it again?
I honestly don't know. It was exhausting burning through all those fics in such a short amount of time. Now this particular fic exchange is smaller and only runs four times a year, so give me three months and I can probably do it again no problem. But right now, I definitely need a break lol No regrets though!!
Highlights of my reading:
I learned Object and Concept Anthropomorphism is a category on AO3. 😲 Which on the one hand, shouldn't surprise me because I KNOW I read crack fic with anthropomorphism back on LiveJournal. But it still delighted me to see it pop up in this fic exchange. XD
On that note Chess Pieces (Anthropomorphic) is apparently popular enough to warrant it's own, individual, fandom tag. Incredible information to know!! I love that!
There's a user named DanceWithOrangutans and they seem to only request or write orangutan fiction or maybe Planet of the Apes fic if they feel like branching out. Truly an icon to end all icons! 🌟 They're my new favorite person and I look forward to reading lots of orangutan flash fiction in future rounds 💜
I have absolutely no idea what was going on in any of the anime fics but some of them were super adorable and fluffy 🥰
My absolute favorite thing was when people who actually know that fandom commented before me, so when I left my little heart, I would get to read them squeeing and crying and freaking out over how good the drabble was. :') They'd be like 'IT WAS SO IN CHARACTER!!! 😭' and I'd be like 'oh cool, the author nailed it! 😄' 10/10 experience
And to wrap things up...
Seasons of Drabbles: Summer Round Superlatives
Best Author's Note:
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satisfy the desire of the afflicted by yesthisisnarumi (Dungeon Meshi, M, 300 words)
Hysterical author's note. Absolutely loved it. 😂
Most Baller Line:
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birds of a feather by embraidery (Stardew Valley, T, 1100 words)
CAN IMAGINE WHERE A SMILE MIGHT GO???????? Are you fucking kidding me right now???????????? Brilliant work! A++ I'm still losing my mind about it!
I Don't Go Here But Holy Shit That's Good Writing:
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recoil by Fleetling (The Man From U.N.C.L.E, T, 300 words)
The use of gun imagery to describe their relationship -- which from the one viewing of the trailer I saw years ago, seems pretty fitting for the movie -- just blew my mind. "voice cracking like gunfire" in the next paragraph? -- GOOD GOD! Again, don't even remotely go here, but damn this fic was really well written!
Best Username:
ECwrotethisforyou
You know what, yeah. You did write that, buddy! And you should remind everyone reading your fics that these are gifts! In or outside of a fic exchange. I approve! 👏
Best Story Structure:
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If Comfy, Warm, and My Size, Why No Sit: A Meta-analysis of Research into the Warm Flat Rectangle by Dr Fluffy Jones by finerandbonnier (Original Work, G, 300 words)
YOU GUYS!!!!!!! If you have ever read a scientific paper for school or for funsies, you need to read this fic! It has FOOTNOTES! It has a BIBLIOGRAPHY in the end author's note! IT'S A FUCKING WORK OF GENIUS!!!!!!!!!!! 12/10 All the applause 🎉👏👏👏🌟
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oneeyedsnoot · 3 months ago
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I pressed send.
My heartbeat was in my throat. She'd been complimenting me on my looks and making so many sexual jokes but that doesn't actually mean she wants to actually see my tiddies ... Does she?
Oh well. We can write it off as a blunder if it goes bad...
Oh god.
*ding!*
My face flooded with horror and embarrassment as I opened my phone.
"🫣🫢✋🏻😩"
I felt a rush of adrenaline and dopamine that ended in a wince of regret. She's just being a girls girl. Supportive. A gal complimenting a bra in the girls locker room. She has a boyfriend and even tho she says she's bi, she's not into me.
"teehee! Thanks girlie 😘 you finally get to see my tits! Were they everything you hoped they would be? Lol"
I made a mistake. She can't know how hard this is to share for me; a demi sexual virgin who has never been this vulnerable with anyone - nor wanted to with anyone else. How can she know? She's been on one night stands, clearly the sacredness of my naked body doesn't translate as monumental to her.
"yur so hot omg 🥵🥵🥵 I want to kiss you on the mouth! 😝🤭"
I couldnt tell. I just couldnt tell if this was still a joke. My heart thundered and I wanted to cry.
"I'd kiss you back 🤭
Want another photo? 👀" I asked.
Maybe I was finally ready to push her to the limit and see how far she'd go. I couldn't keep worrying about her cheating on her boyfriend with me, that was her decision and not mine. What if they decided that I was welcome as a third (not that Id want to sleep with her man: gross) or that he gave her permission to try out being lesbian with me? My brain went around in circles and circles about the ramifications about my feelings.
"YES 🥵"
Goosebumps raised on my arms.
Okay
She wants more.
Picked through more selfies and dropped two more. Again I felt violently exposed but with it a light headedness, a rush of excitement.
"MOTHER 🙏🏻" she said
....
I struggled to regulate my breathing.
"ok WBU 👀😝🫣" I texted back.
I hid my phone under my pillow and screamed into the plush fabrics. I didnt think I could be trusted not to jack off on the images she might send me. Was I a horrible and perverted friend? Was she touching herself to images of me or was she watching a movie with her boyfriend and hyping me up as a friend as I sent her filthy nudes as a bit.
"👉🏻👈🏻 okee!"
(image)
My eyes about popped out of their sockets. Her smooth perfect chest was uninterrupted by clothing. Her perky small breasts down to her flat smooth stomach that tucked into the most perfect hips. She wore nothing but some beige panties. My finger on the screen holding the image open started to sweat. Do I screenshot and have Instagram alert her I did so or let it go and lose it forever? I panicked and made the worst decision: I screenshoted it.
*you took a screenshot* appeared in tiny letters in the center of the message screen.
"omg stop girlie you're so fucking hot ✋🏻😭please don't stop grrruffruffruffbark" I quickly said, wishing the small words would disappear.
She took a moment to respond.
"oh you like that 😼
Horny jail 🫵🏻"
I laughed in surprise. Girl where was your line! How far are you going to let this go?
I couldn't find an emoji for handcuffs or shackles or even jail so I settled for three police cars and captioned:
"if finding you hot is a crime"
And before my anxiety could make me exit into the next life from embarrassment -
"(image)"
She was grabbing one of her tits seductively and looking up into the camera. I screenshoted again, feeling like I was granted permission. I was so scared and so so wet.
"omg girlie I'm wet 🥵" I had to remind myself that she was an adult and could tell me to stop or simply stop responding or change conversation. I wasn't coercing her into anything. I repeated that sentence a few times trying to stifle my OCD.
"yeah you're wet for me? Aw 🥰 how cute 💕"
Mentally ill brain turned to mush brain and with it came a backbone.
I said "girl you're so hot I want to lick you all over. 👅😋"
"I'd let you 🤭"
I was losing my mind.
"I want to suck those sexy tits holy shit✋🏻😩
Please stop me. Please tell me to fuck off.
"oh!"
Shit. Not good. She hates me now. Our friendship is over and I just made everything super weird.
"😈🙏🏻 I want to suck on your mommy milkers too 😼"
My eyes went wide. Holy shit holy shit holy shit!
"plEASE 🙏🏻 they're the perfect size for nursing 🤭" I replied
"💯"
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aerimomo-mellon · 3 years ago
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ENHYPEN walks in on you changing.
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Paring~ ENHYPEN x Reader
Genre~ Fluff cause these boys be too cute.
A/N~ Requested! BTW girl I love you! thank you for requesting!
ENHYPEN M☁List ll Main M☁List
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Heeseung
The second he walks in he is in panic mode.
His mind is probably like "Oh my god! what did I do! I should have never stepped in! I don't know what to say ahhhh!"
But of Corse that is in his mind cause he would never say that out loud.. cause he likes being cool and experienced despite the fact he is freaking out.
When you finally say "hey what are you doing here?" he manages to say " oh um just chilling you know.. I think.. NO I mean I don't think.. NO I actually mean I came here for my... watch yea!"
"baby your watch is on your wrist!" you say pointing at it.
"oh haha must be a mistake then..." he says scratching his head and awkwardly leaving.
I guess his effort of acting cool failed..
Jay
The only fucking one to be very cool about it.
Acts as if he has already claimed every bit of you so won't even bother to make a big fuss about it...
"Hey y/n! do you know where the scissors are? I can't rip the duck tape with my hands.." he says walking in the bedroom.
*Finds you wearing a pair of joggers. *
"aren't those mine?" he says eyes fixed on your lower body. (loves to look at you for some reason) and plus point you are basically half naked( yes you have your under garment on.) so he won't loose the chance.
"no 🙄... my friend got it for me yesterday.." you say avoiding eye contact to hide your Lie.
" Yea yea... now tell me where the scissors are." he continues. "its in the night table drawer." you reply.
"oh right!" he pecks your cheek "thanks baby!"
Jake
shy boi #1. *Walks in and finds you putting on a t-shirt*
Obviously freaks out cause he just has seen your bare back. When you turn around he immediately regrets his life choices.
"oh um.. sorry. I did not know you were changing.." he says looking at the floor.
"when did you get here?" you speak wearing you t-shirt fully. "oh just now! yes just now. and you turned around" he lies lol.
"hey Jake is your foot okay? is it itching? or smth?" you say looking at his foot that was awkwardly rubbing the carpet.
*Jake realizing what he is doing😳* " oh there was this weird thing on the carpet so i rubbed it off" he lies again ..
" oh yeah let me see is it gone?" you say walking towards him.
" yeah yeah yeah its all gone" he had to lie again. You stand in front of him looking up to him. " you don't have to be all shy about it." you say wrapping your hands around his waist, giving him a smile.
Sunghoon
I would not categorize him as shy in this case. Just because he would not be shy at all.
Rather then being all red and shy and uncomfortable he would only awkwardly smile at you.
Eye contact but never lowers his eyes from yours since he respects your privacy.
Laughs after a while and apologizes. "sorry I'll head out now.. love you!"
"me too" you say and he would simply walk out the door. BUt that cute little session you two had was very sweet to you and to him too.
Yes he is out of the room but still thinking about you ahaha and smiling alone in the living room. (sweet but creepy if you ask me ahaha)
"Baby why are you smiling?" you ask walking out of the room. "oh what do you mean? when did I smile?" he says quickly keeping a straight face.
Sunoo
Shy boi #2. Whatever random shit he was doing he decided to check on you and give his little hug.
Having that thought in mind he did not know or expect you to be literally taking your shirt off in the bedroom.
*walks in all happy and Skippy to hug you but*
He raises his eye brows his mouth wide open 😱 *panic mode*
you look back to see who it is but then you find him. The moment you saw him he brings his hands to his eyes to cover it.
" oh sorry hehe.." he says turning around so he isn't facing you. (but still covering his eyes lol) " I did not know you were changing"
"It's okay " you say giggling to yourself cause of his cuteness. "I'm done! you may turn around now" you say making your way to him.
"now, tell me what you wanted" you say as you sat on your bed looking at him. "nothing just wanted a hug 🤗" (that emoji is literally Sunoo) "Cm're" you say spreading your arms for him to fall into.
Jungwon
Shy baby #3. (Enhypen has a lot of shy boisssss sorry but it's true.)
You were getting ready for dinner with your friends. And you wore a cute dress for the night but couldn't get the zip up.
Of Corse you were struggling which made him come check on you.
*walks in the room but doesn't find you at first* (cause you were struggling in the bathroom.)
Finally he finds you and when he opens the door he is 🍅. "oh sorry I did not mean to😳"
"NO its fine can you please help me!" you say quick before he walks out. " It's almost time and I need to zip this. Please, please, Pleaseeeeeeee" you say. "yea sure" his face still 🍅.
Slowly makes his way towards you from behind to zip you dress. *his heart is like in the tempo of Drunk Dazed* anyway he manages to get that zip up.
"thank you!" you say giving him a quick hug. "no problem 😳" (and yes he is thinking about that all day)
Ni-Ki
Not shy specifically but the most awkward one.
You did not know he was going to visit you at your place today. (And yes he did)
You just came out from the shower looking for your clothes to change into.
*randomly comes in the house since he knows the password.* as he made his way to your room….
He finds you only with shorts and no t-shirt. 🧍🏻← yup this is him right here→🧍🏻
“I’m sorry I did not know” last words before he turns around and heads out.
That’s basically what you get from this man. I mean he would probably feel a little shocked but as far as I know he would not make a big deal about it in front of you. Preventing any sort of miscommunication.
After you change you two don’t even bother to bring that topic cause you both be too young for that shit.
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hyunjilicious · 4 years ago
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a helping hand [henry cavill] - part 2
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A/n: I’m sorry it took me so long. I don’t like how this part turned out, at all, but I rewrote it 3 times and I can’t even think about these scenes anymore without getting annoyed. I’m just happy it’s finished and that I can start working on part 3 (that is, if you like this one enough to want to keep reading lol)
Summary: After you post on onlyfans a video starring another man, Henry decides to take matters into his own hands. (cameo: Steve Rogers) KINKY 4k
Warnings: spanking, daddy kink, dirty talk, mentions of smut and masturbation (male), humiliation/degradation kink, groping, mentions of porn and filming pornographic material, stalker-ish/obsessed Henry. (also tumblr crashed when I first tried to upload this so maybe that a sign this sucks)
You can read part 1 here!
-
The sight brought down a storm upon Henry's mind. He stood there, mouth agape, watching the screen, unable to believe his eyes. It was one thing to post videos of yourself on the Internet, but to have someone else take part in them was too much. At least for Henry. Still smart and composed, he realised there wasn't anything he could do about it, but nevertheless, he was determined to not let this shit slide for much longer. 
As much as he wanted to hunt down that man who dared put his hands on you, Henry gathered himself, took a deep breath and closed the onlyfans page. He was perfectly aware that just the right amount of you could get him to lose his sense of control and do things he'd later regret. Still, in desperate need to see you, he grabbed his phone, eyes scheming over your socials, only to see that the last time you had been active was 7 minutes ago. So, without much consideration, he started typing.
"You up?"
"Yep. Finishing up an essay. Coffee in 30??"
Oh, and how deeply that hurt him. "Of course" he sent you, and then checked again the post you made at 3am. '...I'll go to sleep right now, edit it for you when I wake up...'
You were lying? Why were you lying to him? It drove him insane. Henry felt like he couldn't sit down anymore, like he had no chance to catch his breath. He couldn't think straight, so he wasn't really to blame for what he did next. 
Henry's fingers flew over the keyboard, accessing Facebook and logging into your account, desperate to see whether he could find out who the man in your video was. And it was as easy as it could've been, considering your last 5 conversations were with the girl friends he already knew about. But somewhere among them, he spotted an unfamiliar name - Steve R., and instantly clicked and opened the conversation. His blood started to boil when the multitude of emojis you sent reached his eyes, but he scrolled up, until he found the beginning of yesterday's conversation. 
It was started by you, and with a request. You were blunt and went straight for it, asking him with just one message to be in the video with you. There was no trace of your relationship with him on the Internet, so Henry had no idea regarding the nature of yours and Steve's connection. Judging by the way you addressed him, he could easily assume the man was nothing more than a fuck buddy. Even though it angered him, Henry kept his calm and decided to go about this with care. It would only be a matter of time until he removed Steve from your life. But for now, he just had to keep digging for information. 
Steve R.: "Exactly what do you need me to do, baby? Spank you? In front of the camera? Are you serious?" 
"Yes, Steve. Come on!! I know we haven't seen each other in a while, but still... 😇 when it comes to these things, you know me better than anyone"
Henry scoffed. Who the fuck was this guy?
Steve R.: "I know, baby"
Steve R.: "What's in it for me?"
Smoke came out of Henry's ears, and the fact that you acted so sweet and innocent made him want to smash his keyboard.
"Whatever you want! Just do this for me!!! Please!!!! 🥺😊😋"
Steve R.: "Ofc I'll do it, sweetheart. I got you"
"Thank you thank you thank you 😘"
Steve R.: "I should be the one to thank you"
Steve R.: "Send me the location and I'll be over there asap"
After that, your address followed and then that was it. Determined to dig deeper, Henry started to scroll up again, wanting to find out as much as he could about this mysterious man. He didn't get a chance to lurk too much before this computer alerted him of a notification, the onlyfans tab glowing orange. His attention was instantly won, smiling devilishly as he checked the content.
Posted 30 seconds ago, was the new video. Ready to kick back and enjoy, Henry pressed the play button, ready to go at it with an open mind. 
He reluctantly accepted the fact that there was another man in it with you, but he decided to enjoy it nevertheless. The video started, displaying Steve seated on the couch, thighs suggestively parted. He had a pair of black dress pants on, dangerously stretched over his massive thighs. A white, elegant shirt hugged his visibly sculpted torso, the top two buttons undone to show just a hint of chest hair. Quite a sight, but all Henry saw was trash. With his sleeves rolled up to his elbows, a silver watch on his wrist and a pinky ring on, Steve patted his thigh, cueing your entrance.
When Henry saw you, he felt his breath reach a new, sudden level of difficulty. With the shortest of skirts barely managing to cover your ass and a mostly see-through shirt on your top half, you made your way to him in such an angelic way that Henry couldn't believe his eyes. 
You looked like happiness personified, and it came in such a painful contraction to what you were about to do, that it twisted Henry's mind in such a perverse way, his cock nearly twitched just by seeing you. 
When you were about to bend over Steve's thigh, he grabbed your chin and stopped you mid action, his lips slamming against your as his free hand lewdly caressed your ass. He flung the skirt over your hips, your flimsy underwear on full display. 
Attentive to the events unfolding on the screen, Henry found his cock, teasingly rubbing it over the material of his pajama pants. His mouth watered when he felt the sensibility in his tip, actually believing this would be easier than he initially anticipated.
"Are you going to be Daddy's good little girl, or do I have to make this fucking hurt?" Steve asked and Henry almost threw up. 
"Yes, Daddy. I'll be good" you mewled, wiggling your feet. 
"Let's see" the man menacingly chuckled, releasing a sharp slap against your ass that made you yelp out in pain.
At this point, about 30 seconds in that was, Henry was already losing his mind. It was as if you took a trip inside his dreams and decided to play out his fantasies. The only problem was that you did it with another man. It was next to impossible for him to keep this going.
"Can you count?" Steve taunted, his hand traveling all over the back of your thighs, your exposed ass and between your legs. 
"Yes, Daddy" you eagerly nodded and Henry almost threw up.
"I wouldn't be surprised if a dumb slut like you didn't know how to" Steve chuckled, "But it's ok, that's how we like our girls. Dumb and pretty"
"Thank you, Daddy"
Henry couldn't believe his eyes. He refused to accept the fact that a random man got to play with your innocence like that. You were his sweet little girl. And if until now he pushed through heroically, when literal yelps of pain started erupting from your lips as the blonde man slapped your ass hard enough to rock your whole frame, Henry's blood ran cold.
But no matter how hard the jealousy had hit him, the video was still pushing his limits of self control. It was still what he always wanted to see. When he reached inside his pants and grabbed his cock, a low grunt of early satisfaction left his lips. He once again found himself picturing you, willing to please him, but this time, he didn't get to go too far. The buzzing sound of his doorbell rang through his apartment, and he never stood up faster.
Cock still hard and completely visible through his pants, Henry slapped the pause button and minimized the browser, before springing to his feet and rushing to the door.
"Henry!" you exclaimed as soon as he came into view. He looked somehow tired, but it was easy to tell there was something else bothering him. "You didn't answer your phone" you pouted.
"Yeah, sorry" he shook his head, a few sweaty curls falling against his forehead. "I was busy with something. What's up?"
You raised your eyebrows and pointed to the door of your apartment, "You said you'd come over? Coffee? Remember?"
"Oh, shit, yeah" Henry cringed, rubbing his forehead. "I'll be over in 10 minutes, that ok?"
"Sure" you beamed, completely oblivious to the way he just tried to get rid of you. With utter nonchalance, you pushed your way past him and strolled into the kitchen.
"You wanna wait here?" he muttered.
"Yeah... Is that a problem? I can leave..."
"No, no" Henry eventually sighed and rushed over to you. He cupped your cheeks and kissed your forehead. "Wait here, I'll be right back"
And that was what you did. You silently sat down, grabbing a bag of chips you found laying around, and settled to wait. And maybe, a few seconds passed where nothing devious came to mind, but as time ticket itself away, boredom got to you. First you stood up, and padded to the hallway, looking around. There was almost nothing new over there, but it still felt so homey you absolutely loved to inspect every detail. The TV in the living room was turned off, a couple of pizza boxes on the floor and his DVD cases laying around - absolutely nothing interesting.
You sighed and plopped down on his couch, folding your legs under your body, ready to flip through the channels on TV until he'd decide to join you. Nothing seemed of interest, being bombarded with news and fishing programs. "Old man" you thought to yourself, before opening up the menu in search for something less depressing. A wave of nostalgia hit you when you came across a Spiderman marathon, and you were done for. Maybe one full episode passed until Henry walked out of the bathroom, but you were nowhere near ready to leave.
"Look what's playing!" you beamed, pointing to the screen. Henry raised his eyebrows in amusement, his shoulders shaking as he softly laughed at your unusual choice of entertainment. 
"Are you serious? Cartoons?"
"Yes!" you scoffed, extending your arms and gesturing for him to join you. Although reluctant at first, Henry agreed to sit and watch the show with you, but not before brewing some coffee first.
When he returned from the kitchen, two steaming mugs in tow, you shuffled to the side and welcomed him on the couch. He brought you close against him, draping his arm around your body. With your head resting on his shoulder, you sipped your coffee, eyes glued to the TV. "You seriously never watched these as teen? You were 11 when it came out."
"I did" Henry laughed, rubbing his hand up and down your side, "I was in love with Felicia Hardy"
"MJ was so much better!" you shook your head disappointed, "You have no taste"
"No need for that" Henry threatened, his fingers exploring their way down your body. The way he trailed his hand across your hips and thighs made you squirm, smiling to yourself as you shuffled closer to him.
Henry was more than happy to reciprocate, kissing your forehead and squeezing you tighter. 
And just like that, you didn't care about Spiderman anymore. You flung your leg over Henry's lap, all but crawling on top of him. The episode was still playing in the background, but none of you was paying attention anymore. Henry wrapped his muscular arms around your frame, eliciting a soft moan from your lips as you pushed your hips down against his thigh. His hands traveled lower, exploring your body with delicate but greedy strokes. 
As you let yourself get carried away with absolutely no worry in mind, Henry knew exactly what he was doing. And considering how easily you let your guard down, he had you right where he wanted. 
When you hid your face in the crook of his neck, your nose rubbing across the slope of his collarbone, Henry's right hand found your ass. You froze for a second, but his gentle caress helped you relax again in an instant. With his lips against the top of your head, he allowed his fingers to sink into your flesh. Your whole frame stiffened as you gathered a handful of his hoodie into your fist.
"What's wrong?" Henry cooed, grabbing your chin, "You ok?"
"Yep" you whimpered, and then winced again as he squeezed your ass once more. "I'm good-" you lied, cupping the side of his neck into your palm as you crawled higher up his body, your lips right against his ear. 
As weak as he was for you, Henry stood his ground. If you wanted to play this game, he'd do it, but he wouldn't let you win.
"Does this hurt?" he asked, roughly groping your ass.
Jumping slightly from the pain, you still managed to shake your head, blurting out another lie. "... no"
"What about this?" Henry teased, grinning widely as he shoved his hands inside your leggings, under your panties. 
The urgency of his touch made your eyes open wide, your back arching as you tried to push yourself off of him.
"Does it hurt, darling?" he continued, keeping you in place with ease. 
Defeated, you sighed and lowered your gaze, "A bit" you mumbled.
"Just a bit?" 
"Henry-"
"Did he fuck you good?" 
Your mouth fell open. "What- no, I didn't- we didn't do anything-"
"Didn’t do anything?" Henry grinned, his perfect teeth showing as he proudly pried information out of you.
"I just... fuck-" 
Seeing no way out of this one, and eager to stop hiding, you pushed yourself back. Henry's hands left your body as you sat beside him, and he watched you curiously, patiently waiting for you to word your thoughts. "I just filmed a video for my page, that's all" you bowed your head.
"What kind of video?" Henry questioned.
His demeanour was so relaxed, he was right in his element, unlike you, who were riled up to the extreme. "A spanking video-" you cleared, awkwardly fidgeting with the hem of your shirt. 
"Did he spank you good?" 
His hand found your hips again, and you leaned into his touch, nodding your head yes as you were too embarrassed to actually word your answer.
"Then show me" 
He was dominant and stern, and even if you wanted to, you felt like saying no wasn't an option. Henry didn't wait for your permission as he grabbed your waist and pulled you up to your knees, chuckling softly to himself when he saw you shyly smile down at him. 
His fingers curled around the waistband of your leggings, forcefully pulling them down your thighs. "Come on" he urged you, softly guiding you to lay down across his lap, your ass barely covered by the pinkish and slightly unflattering underwear you had chosen for the day.
Henry's breathing picked up at the sight, and so did yours. You watched him over your shoulder, his fingers tracing over the bruises Steve left on your bum the night before. 
"Henry-?" you whimpered, the anticipation building up in the pit of your stomach becoming too much to bear. 
"Yes, darling?" he cooed, leaning down to the side to kiss your cheek. His stumble tickled your skin and you whimpered when his hand made its way between your legs.
You felt his fingers against your opening and involuntarily clenched your thighs around him, hiding your face in the cushions of below your head.
"Tell me" Henry pushed, teasing your folds and clit over your underwear. 
"Nothing, I-" you cried, making him chuckle.
He loved giving you a taste of your own medicine. He straightened himself up and grabbed your ass into his hands, squeezing until you yelped out in pain. A soft laughter of approval escaped his throat as he bent down and pressed his lips to one of your cheeks, applying lingering kisses over each and every single bruise. 
The way he took control of the situation and handled your body, turned you on to no end. For whatever reason, being exposed like that for him, waiting for any kind of judgement to leave his lips, you were getting more and more riled up by the second. You were done for. You did your best not to moan with need, but little did you know that was exactly what kept you from being thrown onto the floor and fucked into oblivion. Just one single sign was all you needed in order to break his self control, but you didn’t have it in you to do it. 
But he didn’t say anything, instead just keeping you on your toes as he had his way. You were dripping through your underwear, and judging by the bulge in his pants that pushed up against your belly, you knew he was on the same page as you. But again, he didn’t allow things to go further. Everything about this moment pointed in the right direction - the teasing, the touching, you were all but whimpering in his lap, but he cut the moment short with a sharp slap against your ass before he helped you up. Henry acted as if nothing out of the ordinary had happened as he pulled your leggings back up, but this glare became colder when he found your eyes.
He bent down and spoke into your ear, "He could've done a better job"
Completely under his spell, you bit your lip and furrowed your eyebrows. "I don't think I would have been able to take any more"
"That's not what I said" Henry shook his head.
"Look at you being an expert" you teased, relishing in the fact that he seemed eager to keep things going. 
"All I'm saying is that if you had asked someone else-" Henry laughed, stroking your cheek, "Things would have turned out much more different"
"Oh" you pouted, ready to tease him further. "Who should I have asked-"
Just when you started getting comfortable and confident enough to push things further, Henry's phone rang. "I don't have to take that" he shook his head when he heard you stopped talking.
"Just see who it is" you giggled, slapping his shoulder.
Before doing so, Henry grabbed your chin and kissed your forehead, his touch drawing you in like a magnet as you leaned into him when he pulled away. With a sigh, you eventually crawled off his lap and then your face fell with disappointment when Henry showed you the screen of his phone. 
"Yeah?" he huffed after picking up, his boss being the last person he wished to talk to right now. 
You watched him closely as he listened to whatever the man was saying, and almost whined out loud when Henry frowned annoyed.
"I'll call you back in 5, ok?" he asked and after a couple of seconds hung up.
"I'm so sorry-" Henry sighed, turning to you, "I gotta go take this, there's a problem with one of the radars, I need to go see if I can fix it remotely"
"Sure thing" you shook your head. "But please tell me you don't have plans tonight"
"I don't" Henry leaned towards you and again, kissed your forehead. As much as you loved the sweet gesture, it was now more than ever that you craved something else entirely. 
"And please don't forget about me again" you giggled, grabbing his biceps and stopping him from leaving without a promise.
"I won't" he sighed, "I'm really sorry about that. I'll make it up to you"
"However I want?" you beamed and licked your lips.
"Absolutely" Henry smiled, sweetly embracing you before walking you to the door.
You had his word now, and you were planning on making it count. There was no way either you or Henry would act as if nothing had happened, and you couldn't wait.
Once alone and seated at his desk, Henry opened up the text editor associated with the code he wrote months ago. When his screen was flooded with errors and his chat popped up with three different messages asking for help from his colleagues, Henry all but yelled out loud in frustration. Not only did he wish to be with you, it was also Sunday, one of his days off. But he couldn't just text the pilot of the plane whose radar went berserk and tell him to wait. So he got to work, determined to get this done as soon as possible. 
But unfortunately, that 'as soon as possible' turned into 3 hours of continuous work. He didn't even stand up to go to the bathroom until he made sure everything was on point. It was about 4pm when the program started running smoothly again, and seeing how he had a few more hours to waste until he had to see you, Henry decided to make the best of them, by getting a head start on his tasks for the following day.
Productivity flowed through his fingertips as he solved the first issue he had been assigned for the day to come, getting ready to start working on the second one when a call caught his attention. He didn't recognize the ring tone, and it only dawned on him that he was still logged into your facebook account a couple of seconds after it stopped ringing. 
Still curious, Henry switched the tabs on his computer, noticing that the chat with Steve, which he left open hours ago, showed that there was an ongoing video call. His jaw fell. Henry tightened his hands into fists, fuming with anger. First as you for doing this, and then at himself for allowing you to believe this was an ok thing to do. He knew there was no way to eavesdrop on your conversation even if he had the password, but that didn't mean his curiosity died down. No, it only grew stronger.
He felt lost for a minute, but then he thought of something. On his dresser, right next to his winter gloves and under his favorite jogging hat, laid an extra set of keys. Henry remembered the day you gave them to him, saying something along the lines of 'I feel much safer knowing that if something were to happen, you could always get to me, Henry.' and then remembered how you stuffed them in his pocket, and kissed his chest before stepping back. Such different times. 
There was no trace of hesitation inside his mind as he grabbed the keys and made his way out of his home. He passed the hallway in less than a second and pressed his ear to the door. It was perfectly quiet, and through the peephole, he couldn't see any light. You weren't in the kitchen or living room, so he felt confident enough. After putting his phone on vibrate, Henry ever so gently pushed the key inside, turning it inside the lock with the most meticulous movement his wrist could muster. The sound of the door knob being turned was so faint he barely even heard it, but his pulse skyrocketed when he heard the click that signaled the door was finally open.
With small, careful steps, he made his way inside. The entire apartment was dark and quiet as he made his way in, stopping just outside your bedroom as the relaxed, deep voice of a stranger became audible through the wall. “Trust me, sweetheart. Just relax, I got you. You’re all tense, I can see it from here. You know I have more experience with this than you do, just do as I say”
With one hand on the doorknob of your bedroom, Henry was ready to put an end to this whole charade. He knew he might regret it later, but he didn't care. The image of a so called friend, pushing you to do anything that you seemed to have clearly stated your discomfort about, flipped a switch inside his brain. There was no stopping him because no one, no one got to push you around like that. Not while he could do anything about it.
1K notes · View notes
nessinborderland · 4 years ago
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Sleepless Nights
Pairing: Cobra x Reader
Genre: Romance/Fluff
Word Count: 2.2k
Summary: Cobra never thought he deserved much in life. All he ever wanted was for his friends to be close and his home to be safe. He fought for it with all he had, but that was it. It almost felt like he was pushing his luck if he asked for much more than that. So he never did. Until you showed up.
Warnings: Smut, Light Angst, Miscommunication, Cobra thinks he's unworthy of love
Notes: This is officially my first High&Low fanfic! Not sure how to feel about it, but I kinda like it. More to come for sure. Tysm to everyone that has been enthusiastic about my passion for H&L lol, love y’all!
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Cobra never thought he deserved much in life. All he ever wanted was for his friends to be close and his home to be safe. He fought for it with all he had, but that was it. It almost felt like he was pushing his luck if he asked for much more than that.
So he never did.
Until you showed up. 
It was like the sun itself had entered the diner the first time he met you. You had introduced yourself as Naomi's friend from abroad, and the ease and happiness you radiated almost made him want to greet you with a smile. And then your eyes locked and you grinned at him, and his heart skipped a beat. That's when he started falling for you.
Not that he realized it at that moment.
It took him months of watching you smile and laugh with everyone around him to realize that the butterflies in his stomach meant he was attracted to you, and that the spark of annoyance he felt when he watched a guy speak to you was jealousy. He thought it was only sexual at first, but he soon realized that it was much more than that.
He was taken aback at the realization; it made no sense to him.
You barely spoke to one another. He was sure that you didn't even particularly like him if the way you acted around him was any indicator. You caught him staring once, and the only thing you did was turn your back to him and continue laughing at something Dan said. 
That hurt him more than he cared to admit.
So he tried to bury his feelings for you. Not that anyone would notice any changes in him. He mostly kept to his corner, reading a book or talking with the guys, as quiet and stoic as ever. You being there didn't change that.
Except that he couldn't stop his eyes from wandering to you, or his attention from focusing on you every time he heard you laugh. 
"When are you gonna tell her?" Noboru interrupted his thoughts with a nudge to his shoulder. 
That's when Cobra noticed that the book he was reading had been forgotten in his lap, his eyes now on you as you played darts with Tetsu and Dan. You were smiling at them like he wished you would smile at him. He felt his ears get warm at being caught, shrugging before going back to his book.
"I don't know what you're talking about," was all he said as he pretended to keep reading.
"You can fool everyone else, but I see the way you look at her," Noboru proceeded, almost making him curse his best friend's perceptiveness, "You're not as discreet as you think you are, you know?"
Cobra took a deep breath before closing the book and making a move to stand up. He wasn't in the mood to discuss his crush or to lie to his friend.
"I'm gonna go–"
"She likes you too," those words made him stop in his tracks, before looking back at Noboru. The man was looking at you with a teasing smile pulling at the corner of his lips, "Aren't you curious to know how I know that?"
Cobra glanced at you once more before going back to his seat, arms crossed as he waited for his friend to talk.
"So, I heard Naomi and her talking about you in the kitchen the other day," Noboru started, "She thinks you don't like her because you keep avoiding her, but she definitely has a crush on you."
"Are you sure?" was all Cobra was capable of asking.
"Absolutely," his friend nodded with a chuckle, "She likes your moody ass, for whatever reason."
Cobra gulped as he thought of what you having a crush on him implied. Did that mean that he now had to talk to you about it? Did that mean that you would say yes if he asked you out? What would that even entail? His encounters with women were merely ways for him to relieve stress, nothing romantic about it.
He had no idea of what to do.
So he did the opposite of what he normally did; he ran away.
"Hmm," he grunted in final acknowledgment of his friend's words before standing up, determined to leave the diner as fast as he could, "I'm leaving. There's something I need to do."
He cringed at his own lie, ignoring Noboru's calling and everyone's stare – your stare – on him as he left into the rainy night outside. 
He liked the night. He liked the rain. It allowed him to think in peace as he made his way home, mad at himself. He was a coward, nothing but a sad man undeserving of love. He didn't even know you. He knew nothing about you, and you knew nothing about him.
So why did he care so much? Why did it hearing that you liked him filled his heart with hope?
His phone ringing made him stop under the rain, checking who it was before pressing the red button. He would find a more convincing excuse for Noboru tomorrow. His phone rang again, and again, making him sigh before finally picking up the call.
"Noboru I–"
"C-Cobra?" that was not his friend. He held his breath as he recognized your voice on the other side, "Cobra, are you okay?"
"Why are you calling me?" he didn't mean for his words to sound so harsh, but hearing the worry in your voice made him act defensive – like you had no business having any feelings towards him. He regretted it almost instantly.
"I- I'm sorry," you said before he had the chance to say anything else, "I just noticed you left in a hurry, and Noboru said that I should try and talk to you so… are you okay?"
"I'm fine," he said, "I just had to leave."
"Okay," there was an awkward pause where neither of you said anything. He opened his mouth to finally say something when you said, "Can I- Can I have your number?"
"My number?" he asked, confused.
"Only if you want to!" you rushed to say. That's when he noticed the anxiety in your voice. Was he making you nervous? "You don't have to. But, you know, if you want to talk… I can talk."
He was in bed hours later after speaking with you on the phone. He hadn't been willing to say much else besides letting you have his number, and he regretted it now. He couldn't sleep, too restless to even lay still. It just wouldn't happen for him; not tonight. His head was full of thoughts of you and what-ifs.
What if this was all a misunderstanding?
What if you actually liked him?
What if he couldn't protect you?
What if he hurt you?
What if, what if, what if.
His phone buzzing broke him out of overthinking. He reached for his phone, his heart skipping a beat as he saw a message from an unknown number.
Is this Cobra?
Y/N?
Yes! How're you feeling?
fine. it's 3 AM
Omg, I'm so sorry! Were you asleep?
nah. can't sleep. u? 
Can't either.
He didn't know how to keep the conversation going. Did he even want to? His phone buzzed with a new message before he could think too much about it.
Can I ask you something?
sure
Are you mad at me?
no. why do u ask?
I'm not sure, it just seems that I made you uncomfortable and I would like to apologize if I ever did something to you.
u didn't do anything. i'm just not really the approachable type 
Ahh that makes me more relaxed xD can we start over then? Friends?
Friends. Friends. You wanted to be friends. That was fine by him. He wouldn't mind being friends with you.
do u like me?
are u passing by the diner tomorrow?
I am! Wanna have lunch together? :)
sounds good
See ya tomorrow then! Goodnight <3
A heart emoji. Didn't those mean something? What did it mean? What did any of this mean? He reread your convo one, two, three times, now with one hundred percent certainty that you had asked him out for lunch.
He definitely couldn't fall asleep after that.
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He rarely ever felt as nervous as he was then, entering Itokan to be greeted by your smile. He joined you at the table, happy that it was only you two and a few other patrons that barely paid him any mind.
Except for Naomi, that sent him a knowing smile as she got your lunch orders.
"Got some sleep last night?" it was the first thing you asked him as you sat across from each other. He nodded, even though it was a complete lie, and asked you the same, "Not really," you laughed, "Had a lot on my mind."
He hummed, wondering if you were as nervous as he was to meet. If what Noboru said was true, that was definitely a possibility, wasn't it? 
You didn't look nervous at all, though. Not to him, at least. You laughed and smiled and talked like he was the most interesting company on earth, even though he barely said a thing. 
It felt comfortable, though. It felt right.
"You have a really pretty smile, you know?" your statement caught him off guard, and that's when he realized that he was full-on smiling at something you were saying. He felt his ears get red immediately, unsure if he should just accept the compliment or try to figure out what you meant by it.
"Thanks?" he said, unsure, "You're pretty too," he decided to add in a hurry, blushing all over his face at realizing what he had said. Was he ever this awkward? His gang would laugh in his face if they saw him right now.
"Thanks," you said with a laugh. Your reaction made him relax almost instantly, and you were soon back to talking and enjoying your food together.
He had to admit, he could get used to this.
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You kissed him first.
You had invited him to your home one night when neither of you could sleep. He didn't think much of it; it wasn't the first time you spent time together, just talking.
But that night was different.
It was just a push of your lips against his, but he wanted more. So he did what he had wanted to do for months and pulled your face closer, consuming your mouth with his. You moaned as he kissed you, pressing your body closer to his, making him feel like he was on fire.
It was intoxicating.
"Bedroom?" you asked once your lips parted for breath. He quickly nodded as he went back to kissing you, now with a newfound passion. 
He couldn't stop himself from kissing down your body as soon as he got you naked, wanting to taste you, to be consumed by your essence. And you let him do it like he hoped you would, moaning his name exactly like you did in his dreams when he was lonely and all he had was his hand and fantasies of you.
But you felt nothing like you did in his dreams. His hand could never compare to the warm tightness of your cunt around him, or how your body shivered and trembled at every thrust of his hips against yours.
"Please don't stop," your begging was music to his ears, "Please, I'm so close."
He did just what you desired.
He didn't stop until you came one, two, three times, cunt clenching around his cock and his name on your lips. He was almost blind from pleasure, wanting to finish but too afraid to do so. Your relationship wouldn't be the same after this, and it scared him.
He thought he passed out when he finally came, moaning and shaking as you held him in your arms. 
"Can I tell you something?" you whispered after you were both exhausted and sore, more than ready for sleep to take you. 
He grunted a yes, burying his face in your hair; he didn't want to face you when you told him you regretted this. You took a deep breath and hugged him closer, pressing your face against his chest.
"I think I'm in love with you."
He froze. He knew that was a possibility. He knew you liked him. He just never expected you to tell him that you loved him. That was… a lot. A lot of things he wasn't sure how to process.
"Are you sure?..." he settled for asking. He needed for you to be sure.
"Y-Yes I'm sure," you rushed to say, looking up at him, "I really like you."
All he could think of doing was kissing you. That was the only thing on his mind at that moment; showing you how he felt without using words he had no idea how to use. You kissed him back just as hard until you were both out of breath.
"Does this mean you like me too?" you whispered against his lips, foreheads pressed together. You giggled when he pecked your lips, hugging you closer.
"Yeah," he said, cheeks hurting from how hard he was smiling, "I like you a lot."
194 notes · View notes
miekasa · 4 years ago
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winter break/skiing au with eren
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↯ pairing: eren jaeger x (fem) reader
↯ genres and warnings: modern au (college), fluff, eren is an idiot but we all knew that, and yes i do think he’d probably be a good snowboarder or athlete in general tbh
↯ word count: 2.7k lol and it’s not even written out like a fic
↯ notes: this is based off of a request i got for meeting eren at a ski lodge. heads up i know next to nothing about skiing or any related sport, so bear with me on this. also this formatting is... headcanonish but also fic like?? in an alternate timeline, i could write this out as a fic, but my lack of knowledge about the subject + me wanting to try this format out resulted in this!
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If he’s being completely honest, Eren wasn’t ecstatic to be going on this skiing trip with his friends in the first place, but he didn’t have much choice, seeing as he didn’t want to be the only one left behind for winter break.
Not to mention he’s a shit skier. He’s fine with a snowboard, so he wouldn’t be stuck on the bunny hills for a week, but that didn’t mean he was happy about it. After all, he was pushing to go somewhere warm for break. You know, since it was already freezing cold at home.
Nevertheless, he sucks it up for the sake of his friends’ happiness (and because he was severely outnumbered. Also because Armin had never been skiing and Eren really wanted to record him falling face first into the snow at some point).
As expected, it’s fucking freezing by the time they make it to the lodge, but at least Jean—resident organizer of this trip—had gotten them a pretty nice cabin with central heating, and a fireplace. It’s more of a house that they’re renting really, with enough rooms for the six of them.
Unfortunately the rooms were not soundproof so he was subject to hearing Jean and Connie staying up until the crack of dawn, and Mikasa throwing pillows at Sasha telling her to shut the fuck up. But at least he got to room with Armin, so it wasn’t all bad. 
Eren spends the first day just chilling around, still warming up to the idea of the trip (and warming up physically, because fuck is it cold here). The lodge itself has main, communal buildings with indoor activities—a game room, indoor pools, hot tubs, a buffet, the whole nine yards—that he spends time exploring.
He’s heading down to the indoor pool with Armin and Jean in tow, the rest of his friends opting to head upstairs for dinner first after their day of skiing; and that’s where he sees you. And, not to sound like a lovestruck idiot, but Eren thinks you might be the prettiest person he’s ever seen in his life.
In a cliche moment, he catches you as your head reemerges from out of the water, face dripping wet with pool water as you tread in your spot. Eren looks stupid—big, green eyes wide as hell and a little bit of a gap between his lips.
Jean has to smack him upside the head to get him walking again, mumbling about how Eren looks like the literal heart eyes emoji to which Eren simply pushes the taller boy into the water.
He looks back to spot you again (in a non-creepy manner of course), when a voice calls out your name—he’s presuming, by the way your turn your head.
“You’ll turn into a prune if you stay in any longer,” a short man with dark hair calls to you, a towel around his shoulder his mostly dry body, save for his swimming shorts that are still damp, “Come on, I don’t want get the shit end of the stick at the buffet.”
The short man’s words seem to make you chuckle, and a little reluctantly, you swim to the edge of the pool, taking his hand to get out of the water. Eren frowns a bit watching the interaction. You and the short man seem close—there go his chances of… well, he’s not sure exactly… uh… talking to you, maybe?
Whatever it was, you might already have a boyfriend, and from the way the rest of, who Eren is again presuming to be, your friends walk with you to the exit, it doesn’t seem like he’d ever find you alone again.
Oh well. He sighs, trying not to think much of it, and enjoy his time in the pool. (He fucking doesn’t because Jean gets his revenge and pushes him in the deep and even Armin his him with a pool noodle. Traitor).
Day two he’s finally going to to the slopes. On his way up in the lift, he can see Sasha and Connie stumbling down the hill while Jean laughs behind them, and Eren only shakes his head.
Yeah, maybe they shouldn’t have taken Sasha, Connie, and Armin with them on the advanced hills, but it was so much more fun this way. Although, to his credit, Armin was catching on quickly (no thanks to Eren or Jean; that was all Mikasa’s teachings).
Eren lets Mikasa work her magic with Armin. He straps on his helmet and goggles, and heads down first. It’s been a while since he’s snowboarded, but he’s still pretty damn good if he does say so himself. He even tries out a few old tricks and—not to brag—but sticks his landing every time.
Halfway down the slope, he can feel someone else boarding beside him—and he doesn’t think much of it, until they replicate his previous flip, landing a just a little in front of him.
Eren can’t see the person through their goggles, but from the way they look back at him before pushing forward, he can tell that they wanted a challenge. And who is Eren to turn down a little friendly competition?
The descent continues on with Eren and his mystery partner not-so-subtly flexing their own skills. Eren copies their flips and turns, and is amazed as he watches them copy his in return. 
He decides to kick it up a notch, swerving over to a small snow rap, to use the height it gives him to pull off his signature move—yes it’s called the Jaegerbomb, yes he did come up with it when he was eleven, and no he doesn’t regret because it’s still sick as fuck, shutup Zeke.
He sticks his landing, perfectly timed with the end of the slope, pushing his board forward to completely stop himself. He turns around, lifting his goggles, to give his copycat a smug look, when, to his surprise, he sees them pulling off something almost equally as impressive, and probably more complex before they land. 
Eren’s got the same stupid, starstruck look on his face as he did in the pool, as he watching their momentum come to a stop a little ways downhill from him, because, fuck if that wasn’t the coolest thing he’s ever seen.
Immediately, they’re surrounded by two other bodies, both of which sing their praises, probably for that last move. Eren knows he would. It’s only after your goggles are pushed up over your helmet and your turn around that Eren realizes its you! The girl from the pool.
If he was awestruck before, it’s nothing compared how he’s feeling now. No way you were the same person! But, he has to admit, if we were gonna get crushed by anybody on the slopes, he’s glad it was a pretty girl.
To his surprise, you make your way over to him after unbuckling from your board, and Eren has to quickly shake the stupid look off of his face.
“I guess I lost our race back there,” you say with a smile, cloudy air falling from your lips from the cold, “But I just wanted to tell you that your last flip was really cool! It must have taken you forever to master that.”
For the first time since arriving, Eren’s glad it’s cold as shit, because now at least he has a coverup for the redness creeping onto his cheeks. With a nervous chuckle, he finally responds, “Yeah, I’ve, uh, kinda been working on it since I was eleven.”
“Well it definitely payed off, I’ve never seen anything like it,” you cheer, and Eren is really considering passing out right now, but that would not be cool. Very uncool. So he doesn’t. “Have you been boarding that long?”
“Yeah! I mean, well, I’m only 21, so I guess not that long,” Eren says with a nervous chuckle, “Well—uh, I guess, like, ten years is a long time, but I—I used to snowboard more often when I was little with my family, then, um, you know college got in the way in stuff… haha… yeah.”
Okay, fine, Eren has never been the smoothest guy in the world, but he’s usually not this awkward either. But can you really blame him?—between your looks, and your skills, and the fact that you actually came over to initiate and carry out a conversation with him, he was a goner from the start.
“I’m Eren, by the way,” he continues, hoping to cover up his awkward stuttering, “And, uh, you must have been doing this for a while too? Your last move was sick, I’ve never seen anything like it!”
“(Y/N),” you respond with a smile. Luckily for him, you don’t seem completely turned off by his awkward demeanor, still as bubbly as ever. “Not really… well, kind of? Maybe a few years at this point, but my teacher’s been a real hardass, so I learned to pick up on things pretty quick unless I wanted to get turned into a human snowball,” you tell him, turning your shoulder a bit to point back at your friends, “If you think what I did was good, you gotta see Levi—he’s the short one yelling at the one with the pigtails. He taught me everything I know.”
Eren recognizes Levi as the shorter man who helped you out of the pool yesterday. He deflates a little—he’d kind of forgotten about him, and he isn’t too happy to be reminded of him again.
“Oh, I see,” Eren nods, glancing over at Levi once more, “He must be a pretty good teacher.”
“When he’s not throwing snowballs as a learning tool, yeah he is,” you laugh, “Anyways, I actually wanted to ask if you wanted to go at it again sometime. I don’t know how long you’re, uh, staying or anything, but racing with you was fun. Even if you did get a bit of a head start.”
“I’m here for the week, actually,” Eren’s eyes practically shine at the hint of competitiveness in your voice. He loves to be challenged, after all. “But I don’t mind giving it a go right now, if you’re going up again?”
Eren has to stop himself from grinning like an idiot when you accept his invitation. He thinks he’s finally in the clear when he hears the short man—Levi—call out your name again.
To his surprise, you beckon Eren along with you, and you introduce him to Levi formally. Levi has to look up to look at Eren, but Eren’s the one who shrinks under his gaze; an embarrassed flush creeping up his neck. Damn, your teacher (friend, too? not boyfriend, apparently, though?) is intimidating as hell, how on Earth do you take lessons from him without buckling in fear??
You point to your other friends—Isabel and Farlan—who are standing a little further away. The former of whom is attempting to make a snow angel while the blonde is enthusiastically recording and taking pictures of the events.
After introducing the two, you ask Levi if he wants to up the hill with the both you again (and no, Eren doesn’t pout when you extend the offer to him—he’s really working on this keeping his feelings in check and being a rational thinker and all that and if you ask him it’s paying off), to which Levi declines (thank god).
Not even because Eren would be bummed if you didn’t get that he wanted to spend some more time alone with you not just to snowboard, but also because he knows he’d fall flat on his face in front of Levi, and then he’d probably have to hide in shame for the rest of his trip.
“Looks like it’s just us then,” you smile at him, “Okay, we can head back up—I’m just gonna ask Isabel to trade gloves with me real quick, yeah? And steal a heat pack from her.”
Eren doesn’t know if he should follow you over to Isabel, so he kind of shuffles around where he’s standing, a few feet next to Levi. (And damn, is it just Eren or is it suddenly 50 degrees colder next to this man).
Eren’s avoiding eye contact and small talk—and subsequently avoiding any bubbling feelings or irrational false suspicions about Levi. Also, he sucks at small talk.
It’s Levi who lets out an exasperated sigh first, not even bothering to turn to face Eren before bluntly saying, “She’s single.”
Eren’s eyes go wide and he’s sputtering in embarrassment—also because Levi said it so loudly, what if you heard??—but he’s cut off again before he can even speak: “Don’t even try it, Farlan and I saw you drooling over her at the pool, too.”
Well, now Eren’s certain that the blush on his face and neck are not from the cold, but from his complete and utter humiliation. “Well, I, uh, I didn’t mean to—”
“You don’t seem to be too great at this, so I’ll take pity on you and tell you she likes you, too. Or likes you enough, at least,” Levi continues.
“I—she does?” Eren blurts. Okay, now he’s probably being too loud.
“She talked to you didn’t she,” Levi says, but the question comes out as more of a deadpan observation, “Look if she asks you about anything while you’re up there—or better yet, asks you to teach her anything, just take it as an opening, alright kid? Trust me, there’s nothing you can do that she can’t.”
Ouch. Eren reasons that Levi is probably right, he’s only seen you board once but you’re pretty incredibly but, still.
Wait does that mean you really were flirting with him before?? You’re actually interested in him???
He hears you calling out to him, and sees you waving, gesturing towards the lifts with a new pair of bright blue mittens on, and Eren barely has the coherency to wave back (stupidly, slowly, lovestruck, like an idiot).
Levi watches the exchange with a bored look on his face. He sighs audibly this time, untucking his arms from where they were crossed over his chest to pick up the snowboard at his feet. “Cabin 24C, east wing. Bring her back after dinner,” he says, hoisting the board under his arm before walking towards Farlan and Isbael.
Eren doesn’t even have time to ask him anymore questions—plus you’ve started walking towards the lifts and he’s obviously not going to leave you hanging.
He doesn’t and your little ski-lift, snowboarding kind of date goes well, even if he’s positive you did take it easy on him.
You’re the one to ask him to go up one more time, when Eren remembers Levi’s advice and finally musters up the courage to ask: “Actually, I’m a little hungry—do you, uh, maybe wanna head inside for dinner? If you’re still up to, we can come back later.”
And when the evening is over and Eren’s gotten your number, he does in fact walk you back to your lodge with your friends, and he thinks that even Levi gave him a look of approval before slamming the door in his face.
(It wasn’t really approval, so much as he’s impressed Eren had the balls and critical thinking skills to actually ask you out in the end. But it’s fine because Farlan and Isabel both loudly told him how happy they were to see you’d scored a date with ‘emerald eyes from the pool’).
Mikasa and Armin are less than impressed when Eren comes back to his own lodge at damn near midnight after having not answered any of their calls all day, but Eren thinks it was worth it, even if he does have a bruise from Armin poking him in the side with his ski poles.
Eren meets you at the slopes every day for the rest of the week, ignoring Jean and Connie’s claims about him being a simp. So what if he is? He’s the one snowboarding and sipping hot chocolate with the pretty girl from pool at the end of the day isn’t he?
He learns that the both of you attend the same university, but are in almost opposite programs. That makes sense, Eren thinks, because he surely would have remembered seeing you on campus before.
You even get along with his friends really well, even if you only get the opportunity to meet them once at the lodge. Eren is more than impressed, he doesn’t think he’s ever seen Mikasa warm up to someone so quickly. 
He thinks he’s pretty successful at meeting your friends, too. Isabel and Farlan continually reassure him that you do in fact have a crush on him (and maybe even persuade him try and kiss you before the week is over. Spoiler: he does, while it’s snowing and everything and it’s pretty damn great). 
On the last day of his trip, Eren takes you to the top of the hill with all his friends, and when you completely demolish Jean and leave him eating your dust, Eren thinks he might just be halfway in love with you already. 
353 notes · View notes
lilyrachelcassidy · 3 years ago
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Birthday Cake
A/N: Suprise folks!!! *me laughing maniacally* The whole scenery for this fic somehow appeared in my head and I just COULDN’T let it slip away, so... My biggest inspo for that was @drawlfoy!! Remember her posting the fic where Draco and Reader work at McDonald’s and are total suckers in their job (arguing with the customers; preparing wrong orders; etc.)? Dee unfortunately, deleted this precious, but it’s stuck to my head ever since (lol lol, it’s the moment where Dee wants to get rid of something, but I kindly remind everyone it existed). Therefore I present to you the next Draco x Reader fic related to our fav fast-food rest. This time, however, they’re not working at the same workplace but... I'm going to stop here cuz I don't want to spoiler :P
**The second thing that triggered me to write this fic is the YouTube video I recently saw with a lady who orders the 'specials' appearing to be out of the menu list of McDonald’s, through the Drive-Through. She asked for a birthday cake, was laughed at a few times, but eventually got what she wanted. Applause for the attitude!!
About the fic (context, my bitches): ofc it’s the modern AU, non-magical world. Draco’s the worst boyfriend ever but always manages to turn things into their righteous place. 
Summary: The birthday is upcoming, and Draco is in a rush to think up an idea for a perfect gift. His ingenuity fails, however, and leaves Y/N very unsatisfied with a disaster that has been forged. 
Word Count: 3.6k
Warnings: my brain playing a total psycho, language, alcohol, sexual undertones/allusions to sex, Pansy being too much of her self... deal...
Tags: @drawlfoy @eltanin-malfoy
Such an unrestrained desire to strangle somebody you hadn't felt in a long time.
Really.
Today was your birthday, which you had been widely announcing for almost a whole month to people you might have accidentally forgotten about it. Having your boyfriend, Draco, on your mind in particular.
You doubted he would have the guts to omit your big day, though as repeatedly as he had done for a few years back. But something between foresight and the second sense of prevention told you to keep reminding him every day of the upcoming event, with a heap of birthday-themed emojis and uppercases in the messages.
Everything was planned out in your head: him picking you up from your house with the sharp-red cabriolet that he used only for special occasions; him driving the two of you to the fanciest restaurant he could find in town; him bestowing you with a nice-looking, golden necklace or a different piece of jewelry you had been suggestively pointing out in the store's exhibition; him booking up a hotel room for you two to celebrate.
Either way, that was much beyond your expectations, as it turned out. And now you were sitting in the front yard of your house, waiting for him to show up.
'If he was going to at all.' This thought invaded your mind for the last hour, try as might to subdue it. An hour you had been sitting tight, hoping it was only a delay caused by a traffic jam or other irrational explanation he could come up with. But you were deceiving yourself, you eventually presumed -- you had been checking up your phone every one minute, only to see if any message notification popped up on the screen, other than birthday wishes from friends who actually cared for you.
2.02pm: Nothing.
2.03pm: Susan 'Happy birthday bitch!'
2.04pm: Instagram notif. (Someone liked your photo, which you had posted before leaving your room, posing in front of the mirror in the best cocktail dress you could find in the wardrobe.)
2.05pm: Nothing yet again.
2.06pm: Still... Peace and quiet.
"Fuck it...Enough," you muttered under your breath, an annoying disillusionment falling like a heavy mile stone on your chest. Tears suddenly started sprinkling in your eyes at the regret, and you were very reluctant to admit that your friends were right -- Draco Malfoy was an egoistic, negligent, self-absorbed pri--
"Hi." You heard the raspy, panting voice says. "Sorry for the delay."
You blinked slowly, stupidly. You raised your head to assure yourself it was him. That his expression actually corresponded to his words and showed some kind of remorse for standing you up. But no... There he was: standing in front of you, plainly confident and unashamed, with his cocky smirk provoking you to slap him.
Oh, how much you craved to slap him right now. "Where to the fuck have you been?"
"I've tried to pick this up," he explained, simultaneously lifting up the paper bag he'd been carrying in his hand. The big, exclaiming letters 'McDonald's' with the brand's logo were printed on its exterior, and it was fully stuffed with something inside.
Not quite comprehending, you furrowed. You attempted to hide the venom in your voice, but somehow it found its way to leak out. "Couldn't you do that in advance?"
"Nope..." It was his turn to furrow, looking almost shocked with the question. And thanks to all those years of your relationship, you knew it was his piss-poor estimation of time taking over. "It was a last-minute surprise."
"Sounds like it," you commented irritably. "What's that?"
"Your birthday present, sunshine," he drawled happily, ignoring your remark. He sounded positively delighted and satisfied with himself at surprising you with that because he saw a slight crease of shock painting on your forehead. "Here you go."
You took his deposit out of his grasp, still quite unsure. What if his gift would only make a situation worse? Can it get any worse with Draco's total lack of tact? Yes. But it was only one way to find out.
Without even stealing a second glance at him, you ripped off all of the packaging that had been folded around, protecting the contents. You tried to do it carefully and without any impact of emotions revealing the way you felt inside, but your hands were shaking with rage, and you couldn't quite contain yourself. You had been highly aware you shouldn't have expected much from him, but still...
You wondered if the universe was playing against you.
There was a moment of tense silence as you struggled to deal with all the wrappings. Rather unfortunately, you wished you hadn't put so much effort in opening your so-called 'gift' because as you finally did, it only angered you more, seeing as the disappointment laughs at your face. And yes, as a matter of fact, the universe was against you today...
"Are you kidding me?" you asked in disbelief, fury reappearing in your eyes. "A birthday cake?! From McDonald's?" Ugly, little cake with the creepiest smiley face of a clown. It wasn't even fresh, you realized, when you smelled it and felt a musty reek of a freezer, it probably had been kept in. A confusing sense of sadness in your chest couldn't reach any higher at this point.
"Don't you like it?" he asked, detecting the wrath in your eyes. At that, you felt the dumbest urge to laugh and never stop. "I thought it'd be something original."
"Oh, I love it," you said sarcastically, a faint voice of hope telling you it was only a very bad joke was still lingering in your head. But it wasn't a joke.
"It's not just--" He struggled to form a coherent sentence. "I've been asking Blaise and Theo about any ideas. I told them, what you had said to me -- 'you didn't want anything fancy.' So we decided it's... something."
"Of course I didn't tell you I want anything, you dolt!" Your voice raised up almost two octaves, and the pulse sped up so fast it entailed a headache along. A neighbor from the opposite garden who was watering the flowers looked at you, startled, and eyes widened your exasperated tone. You didn’t care. "It's how it works: you don't tell other people you expect them to buy something!"
"But I'm your boyfriend. You shouldn't -- er-- feel uncomfortable to tell..."
"Exactly! As my boyfriend, you should have known!"
"Well... I didn't. If that's what's bothering you, we can...we can..."
"Stop." Listening to him and his pathetic excuses was the last thing you were going to do now. "What – why would you even – " You sputtered out, unable to process or express exactly what you were feeling. There was definitely anger and indignation. Curiosity, for another, as to why Draco would even fall for such foolish and ill-considered idea, and -- to the top of it -- hope it would make a good fit. And possibly, the last and most satisfying part, was the wicked impulse to throw the cake directly into his arrogant face, letting him taste his own medicine he had been serving you for years on each failed birthday.
"You know, for once, you could pay more effort and try doing something nice for me," you told him firmly, deflating to calm down your buzzing nerves.
"I've been tr--"
"Do you realize how much it costs me to pretend to be happy when you forget about me? Last year, I organized a big-ass party for your birthday, inviting over all of your friends and buying the best booze I could find to celebrate it properly," you said harshly and pretentiously, as you intended. "The best part is, you didn't even thank me." You stared at him, wringing your hands and expecting to perceive any trope of shame in his eyes. For the first time, you actually did.  
"Listen, about that--" he calmly attempted to cut off your monologue.
"No, you listen..." Did you really want what was upcoming next? Maybe it was about time. "Today, I decided I'm standing up for myself. So, for the last time, get out from my porch."
He bristled, the thunderstruck air hanging around him. "Because of the stupid cake?"
"What?! No! It's just... I feel like you don't give a damn about me anymore." Gulp formed in your throat, and the tears finally left your eyes at the consciousness of what was happening. "I think we both deserve some time."
Your eyes moved to his, and you almost wished you hadn't looked. He was watching you, with pursed lips and a pure mixture of every emotion: anger, sadness, resentment, pretension, dejection. The faintest of his flustered blushes appeared on his cheeks, and you suddenly wished you could hug him. "So you are putting us..." His finger pointed at him and you as if expecting clarification. "...on a break? Is that what it is?"
You were truly torn, to be honest. Becoming single on your birthday was the last wish you had for this day, but you felt a strong sense of adequacy and pride for building up the boundaries of tolerance. Besides, seeing as it was heading nowhere, it was only a matter of time that your relationship came to an end.  
Although, it hurt. A lot. "Yes."
You darted your eyes from him, not wanting to study his reaction in case it caused you to meltdown and jump to his embrace, apologizing endlessly for your words. You loved him. But you didn't regret what you had just said.
Something like a dry chuckle of disbelief escaped out of his mouth. "Is that what you really want?"
'No,' your thoughts prompted you instantly before you could even contemplate. 'I want you to say so many things you're never willing to say. But you don't know.'
So instead, you lied: "Yes."
All expressed, you spun around without peeking back and rushed into your room, already knowing there was no more sense in strives to make this day any better; all of it would bring only bad associations. It would be depressing, even more than it already was.
God, was it how the break-up pained? Because if so, you wanted to be deceased. The world spun suddenly, and you sank to your knees, shaking madly and doing your best to find your way back to your bed, located a few mere meters from you. Part of you felt numb, but your head was wide awake and alarming you that something in terms of a disaster had just happened. Because it did. The clutching in your chest was unbearable, and tears were dashing out of your eyes like a living waterfall, which made you bury your face in your hands. Never have you ever wanted to be so drunk before.
And so many questions rung up in your head at once.
Did you make a good decision? What if you are going to miss him, yet knowing you could never call? What about college -- are things about to get awkward?
No answers.
But you knew someone who would be able to reply to them.
With the blurred by tears vision, you struggled but managed to find your phone in the purse, and then clumsily scrolled through and tapped in your list of contacts before holding the phone to your ear.
Please answer, you begged. Please, please…
"HAPPY BIRTHDAY!" Pansy's voice roared from the other side of a line, as always, enthusiastic.
"Pansy." You tried to sound less brokenly than you were, feeling marginally worse at the reminder of your birthday. "Is Daphne around?"
"Ouch, you're a really nasty bitch sometimes, you know. I'm not goin' to point out today, but since you didn't let me end my wishes, I'll note that for the future reference." You were sure she was grinning at the teasing, seeing as much as she liked that. Normally, you wouldn't mind, but... "How--"
"Pansy, please..." you sobbed out, almost desperate to have someone to consult and share emotions with. Daphne -- contrary to Pansy, who could be very judgy sometimes -- was someone you had especially on mind now. "I need to talk to her."
You heard her sigh; the kind of sigh she used to either prove her resignation or concern. But, as much as it surprised you, she suppressed her curiosity and, without a second word, obediently handed the phone over to Daphne. At least, that's what you assumed because you heard a pause and subdued mutters in the background.
"Y/N?" the milder tone spoke up, and you felt suddenly very strange as if submerged in water of relief; relief to hear the familiar voice. That released you from keeping a distant attitude, and yet again, a sadness washed over you, triggering a loud wail to come out of your mouth. "Y/N, is everything alright?"
"No..." you sniveled, unable to collect yourself together. "I-I... We br-brok-e up."
"You and Draco?" Daphne asked, astonishment evident.
You nodded but then remembered she couldn't see you nor read your expression. So instead, you forced your vocal cords to work again. "Mhm..."
"What happened?"
Restoring the story in your brain again, you told her everything, still tearfully but much more coherently this time. You avoided the details, briefly skipping from one utterance to another, as your conversations had gone, and you were very much thankful she didn't press for more information about the prospect of the situation. If it hadn't been her sporadic gasps or loud inhales of breath, you would have almost presumed she wasn't listening. However, she was, and as soon turned out, Pansy was as well.
"That's bananas!" Pansy shouted somewhere from the back as you had ended, and despite your gloom, you giggled quietly at her comment.
"Shush," Daphne tried to silence her, covering up the fact she had put you on the speaker. You didn't mind because you knew Pansy, who would definitely expect Daphne to cite the whole conversation if needed. But knowing Daphne as well, you could bet she flushed more than she would want to at that point. "So it all started because of the cake?"
"And the delay," you added. "But it's not just about that, obviously. It feels like... he completely stopped caring. And I don't want to be stuck in a relationship where everything is about sex and having fun only. Draco wasn't looking for a commitment, which..."
"Sucks,"ended this time Pansy unhesitatingly, who wasn't now screaming from the other part of a room but openly participating in the discussion.
"Yeah," you agreed.
"As for me, I think he might love you more than you know, Y/N." It was Daphne talking again, and she sounded positively convinced about her view as for someone who had hardly exchanged any word with Draco for the past few years. As if reading your thoughts, she continued. "I've observed you a lot. I know he might seem unemotional, but it's you who discovered him. That must require a lot of trust, you know."
You contemplated, and some of the memories and images from your first encounter run across your brain, try as might to suppress it: spotting each other at the party; binging some whisky shots together; flirty teasing; the very masculine scent of cologne; and then... more spicy recollections -- eager lips pressing against each other; against each others' necks; against other parts of the body; stripping off the clothes in the passionate haste...
Receiving a long moment of silence, Daphne took a second chance and asked. "And what's with you? Do you want to end it?"
It felt like standing before the oracle of truth. Therefore, you couldn't deny it in front of yourself. "No."
"So what're you still doing there?" commented Pansy impatiently, and you could imagine her rolling the eyes. "Get out and find him!"
She was right. You will.
XOXOXOXO
"I thought I'd find you here..."
No. Actually, you didn't. 
You had tracked Draco's phone with your own one with some help of an app that, as the two of you had established still in the relationship, would be a good idea in case of an emergency. That in itself proved to be more than helpful, believing that your argument may be pinned as something in terms of an emergency, right?
So having access to his location, you had found out he was in the park where he had taken you on the first date, shortly after dinner, to watch the sunset that, as he had described, 'was a typical cliche from every romantic movie.'
But you had fallen for that. So much.
You hadn't been aware the place had actually some meaning for him until now, and that... God, that he had even remembered it. Time showed, however, that it indeed did, to which your heart reacted with a happy jolting. But also with a nasty sting of nostalgia following shortly after.
Yet, that only had encouraged you to make up your mind and go looking for him, which hadn't been such a difficult task per se. He was sitting on the bench, in the shade of a tree, and hiding his a little too delicate skin from the sun rays. As soon as he had heard your voice, his gray eyes flew up to see you standing a few meters away.
"What are you doing here?" was the immediate question that tumbled out of his mouth. He arched his eyebrow, and to your surprise, he didn't even look angry or sad with you. Nothing near the edge; actually, almost something like the amusement was painting on his face.
"Aren't you mad with me?" you asked intrigued, completely forgetting about his question.
He frowned. "Why would I be?" His tone was so mild that you weren't sure if he was referring to the double meaning; but then he smirked playfully and said, "Besides, I knew you were coming."
"Wha-- How?" you asked, eyes dilating a fraction, in shock.
He smirked, pointing at his phone in an explanatory manner. After a moment, you finally figured out what he meant: the app must have registered he had been tracked and that your phone was trying to find his. At this notice, you reacted with a wave of flush, suddenly regretting your previous lie. His smile only widened at your expression. "Wanna sit? It's plenty of room here."
"Mhm..." You nodded, pleased to accept his offer, and walked over to the bench, doing your best to hide the evident embarrassment on your face. You felt strange he had taken you with such ease, seeing as merely two or three hours ago, you had burst at him like a cram-full volcano of unspoken emotions.
Draco shifted a package from his side, making more space for you to sit, and it took you a moment to realize it was a McDonald's cake from earlier. Everything started from that -- a stupid, little piece of cake which stood up between...
You shook the thought away, taking a seat next to him, close enough to smell his sandalwood cologne. "You didn't answer my question," Draco reminded you. "What's so important to make you track my phone?"
"I'm sorry, okay?" You rounded your face to him, flustrated, leaning at the backrest of a bench. "That's why I came. I wanted to apologize."
"Oh... Couldn't you call?"
You sighed. "I figured you wouldn't want to talk to me after...you know... our quarrel," you said half-despondent, half-desperate, watching your feet as if it were the most interesting thing to peer at now. "I didn't mean what I said earlier."
"I know," he said. Out of nowhere, he was gently grasping your palms which forced you to look up directly into his intense gaze. His eyes were swirling like molten silver at you. "But I should be apologizing, love. I made a mistake, okay?" His hands traveled all across to your tense shoulders, squeezing them lightly. "I know I should be more... affectionate with you. And this was...dumb. A dumb mistake. With that cake. But I'll try to be better if you give it another shot."
He looked so serious that you instantly believed him. You wanted to actually, with all force of longing, which grew up too rapidly in you when he wasn't around. Draco was a fool, you could easily say. But he was your fool, which was a thing you couldn't be more proud of.
Peeking slowly in the other direction, you asked, out of the topic, "You remembered the place?"
"Of course," he puffed jokingly, smiling. "Our first date. Officially our place from then on."
"Right..." You smiled back.
Honestly, the mere fact that he had called this spot 'yours' warmed up your heart, and you felt yourself grinning at his never-before-discovered emotionality. To assure yourself you weren't the only one caring, it was all you needed to hear.
The whole moment was intense, and now, you realized, is when you should have hugged him. Kissed him. Said something back at his sincere endearment.
But instead, spotting plastic cutlery next to your 'gift', you asked, "So what's the taste of the birthday cake?"  
And you knew he had caught the subtext of your playful inquiry. And you knew that soon you would work things out again. But, as for now...
"I thought you would never ask."
XOXOXOXO
A/N: Looooooool. Such a drama-comedy, right? And I could easily say It feels like 50% Draco-x-Reader / 50% Draco-x-BirthdayCake... But whatever (2am is working like a drunken bud, folks). Happy beginning of August :)
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soulwillower · 4 years ago
Text
helping hand • richie tozier
(richie tozier x reader smut) 
 requested: How about some Richie x Reader fluff and smut where Richie breaks his right arm protecting the reader from someone or something so they end up taking care of Rich and doing things for him until he's better. But one day they see he's frustrated and acting weird until he confesses he can't jerk off so the reader helps him out ;) also I forgot what emoji I was so I'll just be this lol - 🐜
warnings: swearing, smut, switch! richie, oral sex (male receiving), a teensy bit of dirty talk, unedited
[losers + reader are 18+]
2.7k words
you keep your cool until richie sighs for the fifth time. "okay, what's wrong?" you ask, putting down your book and looking at richie, who's laying on his back, staring at the ceiling. so dramatic.
"oh, nothing." he says nonchalantly, but you quirk a brow. "do you need something? does your arm hurt?" you ask, starting to get up and find his painkillers. he shakes his head, using his good arm to prop himself up on his mattress as he tells you not to get up. your eyes catch the pink arm cast on his right hand and your lips quirk up at the messy writing all over it : in fancy writing, the name "dick" (courtesy of stan) glints under the light of richie's bedside lamp.
you'd written your name with a small heart because normally, had it been a different case, you would've drawn as many penises as you could fit - just like eddie and bill had done. but you had a little more sympathy for your friend because, after all, richie had broken his arm trying to help you.
as much as you're sure richie fantasized about being the 'knight in shining armor' that comes to the rescue with swords blazing, what he really did is break his arm by running his mouth. but honestly, he still was your knight in shining armor no matter what because you were unfortunately head over ass for the boy.
henry bowers is who you could blame for all this; its almost as if he had a knack for snapping kid's arms in two like he'd done to eddie when you were all thirteen. he'd been alone (for what might have been the first time ever), waiting outside keene's drug store when you, richie, stan and ben had come out, slushies in hand. he'd come to get a 'revenge' of sorts because you'd given him a slight embarrassment when you dumped your food tray on him earlier that day in the cafeteria.
he'd pushed you towards the wall (and yes, you had dropped your slushie) and wound back like he was about to really give one to you right in the gut, but richie had immediately grabbed his skateboard and smacked bowers in the head with the deck hard enough that you could slip away when he recoiled.
unfortunately for the rest of you, especially richie, bowers tossed him right to the ground and landed a solid punch to his cheekbone before stan, ben and you could rip him off. but it got worse, because richie called him something along the lines of "daddy's boy" and that struck quite a nerve, prompting henry to stomp down so hard on richie's forearm that it broke skin and you could hear the sickening snap.
so after a slight concussion, a round of minor surgery and a pink arm cast fastened around and up the crook of his elbow, richie was unable to go to school for a week and you felt the need to help him in any way you saw fit. you were concerned, but more than anything you just wanted to be around him, because he made you happy and made you laugh and turn red in a way that nobody else does.
"well then what's bothering you?" you ask, walking over so you're sitting sideways on his bed next to him. you swear his cheeks turn a little red and he grins small, "oh, nothing, sweet thing. it's all your imagination, i'm doing swell!" he insists, winking at you. it doesn't work though, and you roll your eyes. "if you don't tell me, i can’t do it for you and you’ll have to suffer in silence." you reason.
richie makes an odd expression and mutters, "you have no idea."
you're thouroughly frustrated now, "i promise, whatever it is i will do my best to do it for you or help you, i just need to know what it is!" you insist, annoyed that he's being so stingy.
he shakes his head, mimicking a zipper motion and he tosses the invisible key into his overloaded trash bin in the corner of his room. you huff and roll your eyes, deciding to pick up and fold some of the blankets on his floor.
if you wiggle your hips more than necessary when you bend over, that’s your own business and not richie’s. and if he stares openly at your ass with his bottom lip punctured under his canines, that’s his own business and not yours.
"no, doll." he says, but his cheeks are bright pink, his lip caught between his teeth as his eyes avoid yours. "you - no." he insists, chuckling to himself awkwardly. despite how weird he was acting, your stomach flutters and sways around because of how goddamn cute he was, how attractive it was when he bit his lip. jesus, you're so fucked for him.
you tilt your head, feeling annoyed that he's being difficult, "just tell me!" you insist, looking at him bewildered. what isn't he telling you?
"well i can't, like, just tell my best friend that i'm frustrated because i can't rub one out without giving my dick cast-burn. that shit hurts, by the way." he adds, groaning as he rubs his forehead in exasperation.
you feel yourself burn red at the words he says and you roll your eyes, "well you just did and i'm horrified." and that's very, very far from the truth.
in all honesty, right now as you look at richie you can't help but imagine him, lips parted and cheeks warm as he pants, the sweet moans and groans that would leave his lips as he touches himself. in fact, it makes you clench your thighs together.
"can't you use your other hand?" you ask tentatively, unsure if you're crossing a boundary that you don't want to cross. because richie is, as you and the losers very well know, very open about his sex life, and you're afraid he will tell you things that will make you see green in jealousy.  
"it just doesn't feel as good, y/n." he mumbles, falling back and sighing. tentatively, you lay your hand on his thigh as you pull yourself up closer to his body. "i'm weak. and injured." he adds in a whine.
"i'm not." you say, lifting a brow. your stomach starts to burn as you realize what you're going for right now - what if richie gets disgusted?
you snap out of it as richie sits up, propping himself so he can look up at you with raised eyebrows. "well lucky you, that doesn't help me, though." he says with a lifted brow.
you shrug, deciding to just fuck it and shoot your shot. "it could." you say boldly, your hand still on his sweats. he gapes at you, slowly licking his lips as an awkward laugh escapes his mouth. the huff of his laugh isn't one of mockery; more one of disbelief as he already feels himself twitch under his sweats as you look down at him.
you clear your throat softly, "i could."
"oh, shit." he mutters, eyes wide and a smirk on his face. "y-you're for real?"
you nod as he sits up slightly so he's even with you, his breath hot as it hits your face. you shrug, hand gliding up slightly to reach his waistband. his breath hitches as your fingertips run over the band. "only if you want it."
the way he nods and pulls you directly to him would be pathetic if you didn't feel the exact same (if not more) desperation in your body for him. his lips are shockingly soft and you smile against his lips as you realize he's wearing bev's strawberry flavored chapstick. as his tongue slides into your mouth, your hand slides over to palm his hardening dick, smiling a bit as he moans at the touch.
a few minutes later you've lost both your shirts, hickies splattered throughout richie’s chest and neck, and you climb between his legs, knees on the ground as his legs fall to the ground from his bed. 
you slide his sweats off and he lets out a whine. "think you can handle it?" you mutter with a smirk. his red cheeks puff a bit as he rolls his eyes.
you press your thighs together at the sight of his dick straining against the fabric of his boxers. “y/n. you’re.. fuck.” he mutters as you mouth over his fully hard cock. your hands come up to the waistband of his boxers and you slide them down as he watches you with intense eyes.
his cock is hard and long and you grip his base, your hand coming to steady yourself on his thigh, trying not to show your shock at how big he actually is.
"think you can handle it, toots?" he says cockily, recalling what you'd said earlier and making you roll your eyes. "shut up." you mutter and slowly you start to move your hand, darting your tongue out and flattening it to lick from the base all the way up to his tip, staring into his eyes as you take in his tip.
he’s muttering swears, eyes wide as he watches you suck lightly. as you take a breath and sink lower onto his cock, your tongue flattening on the bottom of his shaft as you push further, he tightens his grip.
he lets out a low moan which might be the hottest noise you’ve ever heard, his hands flying to the back of your head in pleasure. the rest of him that you can’t fit you pump with your hand, your head bobbing and making obscene sounds in his empty bedroom. you have to clench your thighs because you're so incredibly turned on, enthusiastically moving your head as he groans. the action makes you moan around him and he moans your name, motivating you further.
you shiver when his good hand comes to gather your hair back behind your head as well as he can, muttering "fuck, doll, been wanting this for forever." you’re breathing through your nose, swallowing around him and you moan at his words because god, you've waited forever too. he feels so good, so big as he stretches your throat and you do your best to swallow around him. "good, right there. 'm close, y/n/n."
he pushes your head down on him slightly and you choke, pulling back. he looks regretful, even though his cherry lip is caught between his pearly white teeth and his hair is disheveled and his cheeks are rosy. “that- that was hot. you can do that again.” you gasp, voice broken as you suck in breaths. you feel a string of spit from your lips to his dick and he smirks, eyeing the sight. he shuts his eyes, clenching his jaw, “fuck-” he mutters before he guides you down to his cock again, thrusting slowly.
his hands forcing your head down lightly. “yeah, toots. just like that.” he says lowly as you try to relax your throat, gagging as he pushes you further down on him. you feel him hit the back of your throat and he moans loudly.
you try to pull back to breathe, but he holds you for a few more moments before he quickly pulls you off. you gasp and sputter, knowing you’re fucked because that was about the hottest thing to ever happen to you. you just stick your tongue out again, opening your mouth eagerly. you want him back in your mouth. "please, rich." you say and his jaw almost drops, eyes dark as he pushes you back onto him and guides your head up and down, hitting your throat.
spit is streaming from your mouth and the room is filled with the sound of his cock in your mouth and your moans. you can tell he’s getting close and you hollow your cheeks as well as you can. “shit, doll, i’m-i’m gonna cum.” he mutters, trying to pull you off, but you stay, bobbing and sucking, wanting to taste him for as long as you can.
and he spills into your mouth, your hand slowing to a stop as you slowly slide your mouth up and down, tongue lapping up all the cum from his cock. you swallow it, wiping your mouth with the back of your hand and gasping. his cheeks are bright red, his chest heaving as he tugs your hands so you fall onto the bed with him, his casted arm resting against his chest, you during up on his side. it's quiet for a few moments as he tugs his boxers up.
he turns his head on the mattress and you do too, eyes meeting. "how can i get you to do that even when the cast comes off, babe?" he asks - his voice is teasing but soft. you grin softly and roll your eyes. "i think you just need to ask, rich." you say with a short chuckle. he boops your nose with his non casted arm and it releases an embarrassing amount of butterflies in your stomach.
"right. hey, y/n, can i go down on you?" he asks with a smile. your face feels hot as you gape at him, shocked at his bluntness. "rich, i-"
he laughs, "nah, doll. but for real, will you go out with me sometime? i promise i'm a gentleman. i'll buy you dinner, and then go down on you."
you roll your eyes, smushing his face with your hand as you laugh, leaning in to kiss him sweetly. "yeah, sure. i'm doing it for the food, though." he laughs loudly at this. "sure." he mutters, pulling you to his chest.
tag list: @gabiatthedisco @blisshemmings​ @stenbrozier​ @simplesammyx​ @dickology64​ @clownsloveyou​ @baby-yoda-a​ @moon-shine-baby​ @daughter-of-the-stars11 @lets-vibe-bro @trashedfortozier​ @oceandog13​ @finnskindofwoman​  @kait-tozier​ @upamongthestarss​ @fiantomartell @beverlyparkerr @beauregard-s @diorbubs
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whencartoonsruletheworld · 4 years ago
Link
Disney but just the Queer Mood™ Songs, a full Spotify Playlist
Open to updates should anyone notice a song I missed!
Tracklist with specific lyrics that fuck us all up under the cut:
KEY: A general list of which songs resonate with people. The 🏳️‍🌈is for general songs; if you relate to a song but don’t see ur emoji beneath it, send me a message and I’ll add it!
🏳️‍🌈 General Queer Anthem  🌈 Gays specifically have related to this song  ❤️ Gay Men specifically have related to this song  🧡 Lesbians specifically have related to this song 💕 Bisexuals/Pansexuals specifically have related to this song  💜 Asexuals/Ace-spectrum people specifically have related to this song 💚 Aromatics/Aro-spectrum people specifically have related to this song 🤍 Trans people have specifically related to this song 🖤 Nonbinary/Genderqueer people have specifically related to this song  💗 Polyamorous people have specifically related to this song
Know Who You Are - Moana
🏳️‍🌈
They have stolen the heart from inside you But this does not define you  This is not who you are You know who you are...
I Wonder - Sleeping Beauty 
🌈🧡
I wonder, I wonder, I wonder why each little bird has a someone To sing to, sweet things to, A gay little love melody I wonder, I wonder, I wonder if my heart keeps singing, Will my song go winging To someone, who'll find me And bring back a love song to me...
Mother Knows Best - Tangled
🏳️‍🌈 honestly this is just... a general song for some of our shitty relationships to guardian figures...
It's a scary world out there Mother knows best One way or another Something will go wrong, I swear
Me, I'm just your mother, what do I know? I only bathed and changed and nursed you Go ahead and leave me, I deserve it Let me die alone here, be my guest When it's too late You'll see, just wait Mother knows best
Don't forget it You'll regret it...
Dangerous to Dream - Frozen Broadway Production
🏳️‍🌈
I can't be what you expect of me But I'm trying every day with all I do and do not say Here on the edge of the abyss Knowing everything in my whole life has lead to this And so I pull inside myself, close the walls, put up my guard I've practiced every single day for this So why is it so hard?
I can't dwell on what we've lost And our secrecy and silence comes at such a cost
I wish I could tell the truth Show you who's behind the door I wish you knew what all this pantomime And pageantry was for
It's dangerous to wish I could make choices of my own Dangerous to even have that thought I'm dangerous just standing here for everyone to see If I let go of rules who knows how dangerous I'd be?
Reflection - Mulan 
🏳️‍🌈🤍🖤- literally everyone requested this. everyone. so im just copy-pasting the entire lyrics sorry not sorry
Look at me, I will never pass for a perfect bride Or a perfect daughter Can it be I'm not meant to play this part? Now I see that if I were truly to be myself I would break my family's heart
Who is that girl I see staring straight back at me? Why is my reflection someone I don't know? Somehow I cannot hide who I am, though I’ve tried  When will my reflection show who I am inside?
How I pray that a time will come I can free myself From their expectations On that day, I'll discover someway to be myself And to make my family proud They want a docile lamb No one knows who I am Must there be a secret me I'm forced to hide? Must I pretend that I'm Someone else for all time? When will my reflection show Who I am inside? When will my reflection show Who I am inside?
Everything I Ever Thought I Knew - Tangled: The Series
🏳️‍🌈 when u realize u might not be straight lol
I thought no one could love me And how could I have known? I was wrong, oh so wrong
Everything I ever thought I knew Where I've been, where I'm going Everything I counted on turned out to be untrue Could've guessed, should've known, now I do
If none of it was really me then who am I supposed to be?
I guess I'm someone else now I wonder who I am
God Help the Outcasts - Hunchback of Notre Dame
🏳️‍🌈...yeah. yeah
Yes, I know I'm just an outcast I shouldn't speak to You Still, I see Your face and wonder Were You once an outcast, too?
God help the outcasts, hungry from birth Show them the mercy they don't find on Earth God help my people, they look to You, still God help the outcasts or nobody will
I ask for nothing, I can get by But I know so many less lucky than I Please help my people, the poor and downtrod I thought we all were the children of God
Belle (Reprise) - Beauty and the Beast
🌈 when a cishet thinks ur interested smh
Madame Gaston! Can't you just see it? Madame Gaston! His little wife No, sir! Not me! I guarantee it I want much more than this provincial life!
I want adventure in the great wide somewhere I want it more than I can tell And for once it might be grand To have someone understand I want so much more than they've got planned...
Part of Your World - The Little Mermaid
🌈 SO many people requested this one guys it’s not even funny
Wandering free, wish I could be Part of that world
Betcha on land, they understand Bet they don't reprimand their daughters Bright young women, sick of swimming Ready to stand
When's it my turn? Wouldn't I love, Love to explore that shore up above?
One Jump Ahead (Reprise) - Aladdin
🏳️‍🌈
Riff-raff, street rat I don't buy that If only they'd look closer
Would they see a poor boy? No, siree They'd find out There's so much more to me...
Proud of Your Boy - Aladdin Broadway Production 
🏳️‍🌈❤️🤍
That I've been one rotten kid Some son, some pride and some joy But I'll get over these lousin' up Messin' up, screwin' up times...
Water flows under the bridge Let it pass, let it go There's no good reason that you should believe me Not yet, I know, but
Someday and soon I'll make you proud of your boy Though I can't make myself taller Or smarter or handsome or wise I'll do my best, what else can I do? Since I wasn't born perfect like Dad or you...
Someone’s Waiting for You - The Rescuers
🏳️‍🌈
Be brave, little one Make a wish for each sad little tear Hold your head up though no one is near Someone's waiting for you
Always keep a little prayer in your pocket And you're sure to see the light Soon there'll be joy and happiness And your little world will be bright
Have faith, little one Til your hopes and your wishes come true
Stick to the Status Quo - High School Musical 
🏳️‍🌈 🌈 YOU ALL KNOW EXACTLY WHY THIS IS HERE
No, no, no, stick to the stuff you know It is better by far to keep things as they are Don't mess with the flow, no no Stick to the status quo
Into the Unknown - Frozen 2
🏳️‍🌈
I can hear you, but I won't Some look for trouble while others don't There's a thousand reasons I should go about my day And ignore your whispers which I wish would go away
I've had my adventure, I don't need something new I'm afraid of what I'm risking if I follow you
Or are you someone out there who's a little bit like me? Who knows deep down I'm not where I'm meant to be? Every day's a little harder as I feel my power grow Don't you know there's part of me that longs to go
Where are you going? Don't leave me alone How do I follow you Into the unknown?
Go the Distance - Hercules 
🏳️‍🌈
I have often dreamed of a far off place Where a great, warm welcome will be waiting for me
And a voice keeps saying This is where I'm meant to be
I am on my way, I can go the distance I don't care how far, somehow I'll be strong I know every mile will be worth my while I would go most anywhere to find where I belong
Tomorrow - Annie
🏳️‍🌈 - betcha didnt know disney had an annie movie did u
The sun will come out tomorrow Bet your bottom dollar that tomorrow There'll be sun
When I'm stuck in a day that's gray and lonely, I just stick out my chin and grin and say, oh, The sun’ll come out tomorrow So you gotta hang on til tomorrow, come what may...
Learn Me Right - Brave
🏳️‍🌈💜💚
Though I may speak some tongue of old Or even spit out some holy word I have no strength with which to speak When you sit me down and see I’m weak
We will run and scream you will dance with me We'll fulfill our dreams, and we'll be free We will be who we are, and they’ll heal our scars Sadness will be far away...
Strange Sight - Tinkerbell and the Legend of the Neverbeast 
🏳️‍🌈
You stand in the light You're wrong, but you're right And my heart's beating wildly Strange how I'm scared but delighted Afraid, but excited too
I will understand you Strange how I'm drawn to the danger I reach out my hand to you
If you're caught in the shadows and turned all around Lost in the darkness, you will be found If you hear my voice, follow the sound Cause I'm here to guide you home... 
I Don’t Dance - High School Musical 2 
🌈 ❤️ 💕 okay so if you weren’t here for the high school musical tumblr revival you may be confused but listen... it’s about being mlm... 
Step up to the plate, start swinging
I wanna play ball Now that’s all, this is what I do It ain’t no dance that you can show me
I’ve got what it takes playin’ my game So you best skin that pitch you gonna throw me, yeah I’ll show you how I swing
I can prove it to you ‘til you know it’s true Cause I can swing it, I can bring it to the diamond too You’re talking a lot, show me what you got Stop, swing!
Kiss the Girl - cover of The Little Mermaid 
this version is sung by a girl so 🧡💕
There you see her, sitting there across the way She don't got a lot to say but there's something about her And you don't know why, but you're dying to try You wanna kiss the girl
Yes, you want her Look at her, you know you do It's possible she want you too There is one way to ask her...
Can You Feel the Love Tonight - The Lion King 
🏳️‍🌈
An enchanted moment And it sees me through It's enough for this restless warrior Just to be with you
There's a time for everyone if they only learn That the twisting kaleidoscope moves us all in turn There's a rhyme and reason to the wild outdoors When the heart of this star-crossed voyager Beats in time with yours
And can you feel the love tonight? It is where we are It's enough for this wide-eyed wanderer That we got this far And can you feel the love tonight? How it's laid to rest It's enough to make kings and vagabonds Believe the very best
Beauty and the Beast - Beauty and the Beast 
🏳️‍🌈- a lot of queer people tend to empathize with ���beastly” characters so we all latched the fuck onto this movie huh
Just a little change, small to say the least Both a little scared, neither one prepared
Ever just the same, ever a surprise Ever as before, ever just as sure As the sun will rise
Tale as old as time, tune as old as song Bittersweet and strange, finding you can change Learning you were wrong...
Healing Incantation - Tangled 
🏳️‍🌈🤍🖤
Heal what has been hurt Change the fates' design Save what has been lost Bring back what once was mine
So Close - Enchanted 
🏳️‍🌈🌈
A life goes by, romantic dreams will stop So I bid mine goodbye and never knew So close was waiting waiting here with you And now, forever, I know All that I wanted to hold you so close
Oh, how could I face the faceless days If I should lose you now?
So close to reaching that famous happy end Almost believing this one's not pretend Let’s go on dreaming though we know we are So close, so close, and still So far...
If Only - Descendants
🏳️‍🌈🌈
A million thoughts in my head Should I let my heart keep listening? Cause up 'til now, I've walked the line Nothing lost but something missing I can't decide what's wrong, what's right Which way should I go?
Every step, every word With every hour I'm feeling in To something new, something brave To someone I've never been
Will you still be with me When the magic's all run out?
If only I knew what my heart was telling me Don't know what I'm feeling Is this just a dream? If only I could read the signs in front of me I could find the way to who I'm meant to be
Wherever You Are - Pooh’s Grand Adventure: The Search for Christopher Robin 
🏳️‍🌈- out of context could be interpreted as romantic, esp since the credits version is a duet (🌈 💕) but the original context is friendship so honestly it’s very 💜💚
I'm out here in the dark, all alone and wide awake Come and find me I'm empty and I'm cold, and my heart's about to break Come and find me
I need you to come here and find me Cause without you, I'm totally lost I've hung a wish on every star It hasn't done much good so far I can only dream of you
But when the morning comes and the sun begins to rise, I will lose you Because it’s just a dream, when I open up my eyes, I will lose you
I used to believe in forever, But forever is too good to be true I've hung a wish on every star It hasn't done much good so far
I don't know what else to do Except to try to dream of you And wonder, if you're dreaming too Wherever you are
I Won’t Say (I’m In Love) - Hercules
🏳️‍🌈 🌈 💕
If there's a prize for rotten judgment, I guess I've already won that
Who d'you think you're kiddin'? He's the earth and heaven to ya Try to keep it hidden Honey, we can see right through ya Girl, you can't conceal it We know how you feel And who you're thinking of
I thought my heart had learned its lesson It feels so good when you start out My head is screaming "Get a grip, girl!" Unless you're dying to cry your heart out
You keep on denying Who you are and how you're feeling Baby, we're not buying Hon, we saw you hit the ceiling
This scene won't play I won't say I'm in love
At least out loud, I won't say I'm in love
Endless Night - The Lion King Broadway Production 
🏳️‍🌈🤍 🖤 
Where has the starlight gone? Dark is the day How can I find my way home? Home is an empty dream, lost to the night Father, I feel so alone
When will the dawning break, oh, endless night Sleepless I dream of the day
I know that the night must end And that the sun will rise I know that the clouds must clear And that the sun will shine
Set Yourself Free - Tangled: The Series 
🏳️‍🌈🤍
There's much more inside of you than anyone can see And now the choice is yours Life waits beyond the doors So step on through, the time has come And only you can set yourself free!
No one else can tell you what to do Or who to be! No one gets to say if you will stay or go
Look inside your heart and find the key... And set yourself free!
Bound up by your worries Trapped by your mistakes Forced to play a role you never chose Why not test your limits? You've got what it takes Let it out and follow where it goes
No more letting someone else define you to a "T" You know that you are strong You've known it all along So seize the day, let down your hair You’ll find a way to set yourself free!
So look to the horizon Open up your wings! Fly away to find your destiny... And set yourself free!
Speechless - Aladdin 2019 Remake 
🏳️‍🌈 ALL OF US ALL OF US
Here comes a wave meant to wash me away A tide that is taking me under
Cause I'll breathe when they try to suffocate me! Don't you underestimate me! Cause I know that I won't go speechless!
Written in stone, every rule, every word Centuries old and unbending "Stay in your place, better seen and not heard," Well, now that story is ending
Try to lock me in this cage! I won't just lay me down and die! I will take these broken wings And watch me burn across the sky!
I’m Still Here (Jim’s Theme) - Treasure Planet
🏳️‍🌈❤️🤍
I am a question to the world Not an answer to be heard Or a moment that's held in your arms
You don't know me And I'll never be what you want me to be
And what do you think you'd understand I'm a boy - No, I'm a man You can't take me and throw me away And how can you learn what's never shown Yeah, you stand here on your own They don't know me, cause I’m not here 
And I want to tell you who I am Can you help me be a man They can't break me As long as I know who I am
They can't tell me who to be 'Cause I'm not what they see Yeah, the world is still sleepin' While I keep on dreaming for me And their words are just whispers and lies That I'll never believe!
Crossing the Line - cover of Tangled: the Series 
🏳️‍🌈 🧡 tfw when u are DONE with that fuckin closet 
This has to stop now This thing where you think that you've been my friend And don't even hear how you condescend The way you've always done
How I've tried to jump that great divide! But I've never got the chances you were given You don't know how much I've been denied Well, I'm not being patient anymore
I'm crossing the line! And I'm done holding back So look out, clear the track, it's my turn! I'm taking what's mine Every drop, every smidge If I'm burning a bridge, let it burn! But I'm crossing the line...
Let it Go - Frozen 
🏳️‍🌈 listen. i do not have to explain this one. you all know exactly why it’s here. we were all tiny gays in 2013 losing our shit in the theater for no discernable reason why. we know
Couldn't keep it in, Heaven knows I tried
Don't let them in, don't let them see Be the good girl you always have to be Conceal, don't feel, don't let them know Well, now they know!
Let it go! Let it go! Turn away and slam the door! I don't care what they're going to say!
It's funny how some distance makes everything seem small And the fears that once controlled me can't get to me at all!
No right, no wrong, no rules for me I'm free!
I'm never going back, the past is in the past!
Let it go! Let it go! And I'll rise like the break of dawn Let it go! Let it go! That perfect girl is gone!
This is Me - Camp Rock 
🏳️‍🌈 🧡 💕 🤍
I've always been the kind of girl that hid my face So afraid to tell the world what I've got to say But I have this dream right inside of me I'm gonna let it show it's time To let you know It's to let you know
Do you know what it's like to feel so in the dark? To dream about a life where you're the shining star
This is real, this is me I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be, now Gonna let the light shine on me Now I've found who I am there's no way to hold it in No more hiding who I wanna be...
Breaking Free - High School Musical 
🏳️‍🌈 🖤
You know the world can see us In a way that's different than who we are Creating space between us 'Till we're separate hearts But your faith it gives me strength Strength to believe
Soarin, flyin There’s not a star in heaven that we can’t reach If we’re trying, yeah we’re breaking free  We’re running, climbin  To get to the place, to be all that we can be  Now’s the time, so we’re breaking free
True To Your Heart - Mulan 
🏳️‍🌈 🌈
Baby, I knew at once that you were meant for me Deep in my soul, I know that I'm your destiny Though you're unsure Why fight the tide Don't think so much Let your heart decide
True to your heart You must be true to your heart That's when the heavens'll part And, baby, shower you with my love Open your eyes Your heart can tell you no lies And when you're true to your heart I know it's gonna lead you straight to me
Someone ya know is on your side can set you free I can do that for you if you believe in me Why second guess what feels so right Just trust your heart And you'll see the light
Never Knew I Needed - The Princess and the Frog 
🏳️‍🌈 🌈 💕
For the way you changed my plans For being the perfect distraction For the way you took the idea that I have Of everything that I wanted to have And made me see there was something missing...
My accidental happily ever after The way you smile and how you comfort me with your laughter I must admit you were not a part of my book But now if you open it up and take a look You're the beginning and the end of every chapter
You're the best thing I never knew I needed So when you were here I had no idea You'd be the best thing I never knew I needed So now it's so clear I need you here always
Colors of the Wind - Pocahontas 
🏳️‍🌈 - colors.... rainbows.... yea
How can there be so much that you don't know? You don't know...
You think the only people who are people Are the people who look and think like you But if you walk the footsteps of a stranger You'll learn things you never knew, you never knew
How high will the sycamore grow If you cut it down, then you'll never know And you'll never hear the wolf cry to the blue corn moon For whether we are white or copper skinned We need to sing with all the voices of the mountains We need to paint with all the colors of the wind...
I See the Light - Tangled 
🏳️‍🌈 🌈 - you would not BELIEVE how many of y’all requested this one
Now I'm here, blinking in the starlight Now I'm here, suddenly I see Standing here, it's all so clear I'm where I'm meant to be
Now she's here shining in the starlight Now she's here, suddenly I know If she's here it's crystal clear I'm where I'm meant to go
And at last I see the light And it's like the fog has lifted And at last I see the light And it's like the sky is new And it's warm and real and bright And the world has somehow shifted
All at once, everything looks different Now that I see you
Strangers Like Me - Tarzan 
🏳️‍🌈 🤍 🖤- that moment when u find another queer person and ur like “holy shit”
I can see there's so much to learn It's all so close and yet so far I see myself as people see me Oh, I just know there's something bigger out there
Come with me now to see my world Where there's beauty beyond your dreams Can you feel the things I feel Right now, with you Take my hand There's a world I need to know...
Why Should I Worry? - Oliver & Company 
🏳️‍🌈- we’re queer, we’re here, get used to it 
Why should I worry? Why should I care? I may not have a dime But I got street savoir-faire Why should I worry? Why should I care? It's just be-bopulation And I got street savoir-faire
Why should I worry? Why should I care? And even when I crossed that line I got street savoir-faire
Welcome - Brother Bear 
🏳️‍🌈 pride parade amirite
Everyone's invited This is how we live We are here for each other, happy to give All we have we share And all of us we care
There's a bond between us nobody can explain It's a celebration of life We see our friends again I'll be there for you I know you'll be there for me, too So come on!
This has to be the most beautiful The most peaceful place I've ever been to It's nothing like I've never seen before When I think how far I've come I can't believe it And yet I see it In them I see family I see the way we used to be...
The Great Divide - Tinkerbell and the Secret of the Wings
🏳️‍🌈
I'm on your side Let's take this ride And together we're facing the world Doing things nobody's done before And the great divide doesn’t seem so wide anymore
With You by My Side - Tangled: the Series 
💗 - tangled the series was so close to being canon polyam istg
Now; now more than ever We must stick together united
If we're destined to head in our own different ways Let's make the most of these sweet final days Why not go out in a glorious blaze
There's nothing I couldn't do Not with you by my side What in the world would I do Without you by my side...
Love Will Find a Way - The Lion King 2: Simba’s Pride
🏳️‍🌈 🌈
In a perfect world One we've never known We would never need to face the world alone They can have the world We'll create our own I may not be brave or strong or smart But somewhere in my secret heart
And if only they could feel it too The happiness I feel with you
Like dark turning into day Somehow we'll come through Now that I've found you Love will find a way I know love will find a way
Space Between - Descendants 2
🧡 never have i ever seen gays flock to a song faster
And you can find me in the space between Where two worlds come to meet I'll never be out of reach Cause you're a part of me so you can find me in the space between You'll never be alone No matter where you go We can meet in the space between
Even if we're worlds apart You're still in my heart It will always be you and me, yeah
If I Never Knew You - Pocahontas
🏳️‍🌈🌈
And if I never held you I would never have a clue How at last I'd find in you The missing part of me...
In this world so full of fear Full of rage and lies I can see the truth so clear In your eyes So dry your eyes
If I never knew you I'd be safe but half as real Never knowing I could feel A love so strong and true
I thought our love would be so beautiful  Somehow we'd make the whole world bright I never knew that fear and hate could be so strong All they'd leave us were these whispers in the night But still my heart is saying we were right
I’d Give Anything - Tangled: the Series 
🧡 rapunzel’s sad breakup song
So if you find that you're in darkness or despair Though you won't turn to me please know I'll be right there Name any sacrifice, I'll pay the price that's due Cause I'd give anything for you Yes, I'd give anything to relive everything we knew...
Someday - Hunchback of Notre Dame 
🏳️‍🌈
I used to believe In the days I was naïve That I'd live to see A day of justice dawn And though I will die Long before that morning comes I'll die while believing still It will come when I am gone
Someday, when we are wiser When the world's older, when we have learned I pray someday we may yet live To live and let live
Someday, these dreams will all be real Till then we'll wish upon the moon Change will come, one day Someday soon... 
No One Is Alone - Into the Woods 
🏳️‍🌈
Mother cannot guide you, now your on your own. Only me beside you, still you're not alone. No one is alone. Truly, no one is alone…
People make mistakes Holding to their own  Thinking they’re alone 
Someone is on your side, someone else is not  While we’re seeing our side, maybe we forgot  They are not alone, no one is alone...
I Am Moana (Song of the Ancestors) - Moana
🏳️‍🌈 🤍 - it’s about the self-acceptance binch
Sometimes, the world seems against you The journey may leave a scar But scars can heal and reveal just Where you are
The people you love will change you The things you have learned will guide you And nothing on Earth can silence The quiet voice still inside you
I've delivered us to where we are I have journeyed farther I am everything I've learned and more Still it calls me
And the call isn't out there at all, it's inside me! It's like the tide, always falling and rising I will carry you here in my heart, you remind me That come what may I know the way
Show Yourself - Frozen 2 
🏳️‍🌈 - this one was claimed immediately by the queer community and we all have a stake in it but i do want to point out that i got this from a LOT of 🤍 🖤 💜 💚
I have always been a fortress Cold secrets deep inside You have secrets too But you don't have to hide
I've never felt so certain All my life, I've been torn But I'm here for a reason Could it be the reason I was born? I have always been so different Normal rules did not apply Is this the day? Are you the way I finally find out why?
Oh, show yourself Let me see who you are... Come to me now Open your door Don't make me wait One moment more!
(Come, my darling, homeward bound) I am found!
Transformation / Beauty and the Beast (Reprise) - Beauty and the Beast Broadway Production 
🏳️‍🌈
We are home, we are where we shall be forever  Trust in me, for you know I won’t run away from today This is all that I need, and all that I need to say  Don’t you know how you’ve changed me? Strange how I finally see  I found home, you’re my home, stay with me... 
Finale / Let it Go - Frozen Broadway Production 
🏳️‍🌈 this makes me bawl so it gets finale
There’s so much I longed to say Then say it all, beginning with today It’s like a dream I thought could never be  Elsa, you’re free 
Here we stand in the light of day Let the sun shine on 
I take this warmth within and send it up above Goodbye to dark and fear, let’s fill this world with light and love And here surrounded by a family at least  We’re never going back, the past is in the past 
Let our true love go  Let it go!
67 notes · View notes
lovemesomesurveys · 3 years ago
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When was the last time you read a book? I’m always reading a book; I’m currently reading one now. What was the last flavor of tea you drank? Peppermint. If you're a youtuber, what was the last tag video you filmed? I’m not a YouTuber. Are you subscribed to a lot of channels on youtube? Yes. What's a trend from high school that you miss? *shrug* My high school years feel so long ago. I mean, it has been over a decade...
What color are your snow boots? I don’t have snow boots. Has it snowed yet this year where you live? It doesn’t snow here. :( What month is it right now? December. Do you like the season your birthday is in, or would you change it? I’m a summer baby, but I wish I was born in the fall or winter. I hate the summertime. I guess it was cool when I was a kid because it was during summer break and I used to actually enjoy that time of year and playing outside. Now I dread summer. Do you make lists of baby names that you like? No. What color were the last pair of leggings you wore? Black. Do you eat breakfast every day? Usually. I may miss a day or two sometimes. What is something you hate about your hair? Well, right now it’s very short and choppy and completely my natural hair color, which I don’t like. I miss my red hair. I miss my long hair, too, but it just got to be too much maintenance and required too much energy for me and I couldn’t manage it anymore so I chopped it off.  What was the last thing you had to eat? Ramen. Do you wish you had a better phone? I like my phone. Will you be making a Christmas wish list video for youtube? No. If you're a youtuber, what is your channel name? -- ...and how many subscribers do you have? -- Would you ever want to do youtube as a career? No. What was the first thing that you wanted to be when you grew up? A teacher. What is annoying you right now? Nothing really at the current moment. Do you have a headache? No. What color is the rim of your whiteboard? Black. Are you an alien? (lol I am!) ... Do you think your parents' childhood photos look vintage? Sure. Unicorn emoji or heart eyes emoji? Heart eyes. Do you find texting fun? No. How old were you when you got your license? I don’t have my license. Do you miss someone? Yes.
If you could change one thing about your life, what would it be? My health. Do you block a lot of people on facebook? No. What are your top five picks of baby names for girls? Blah. ....for boys? Bleh. What do you think would be good names for twins? Meh. Do you have any friends who have had twins? No. If yes, what are the twins' names? -- Do you have a twin? No. If you had a twin sister, what would she be named? How should I know? Have you ever let someone walk on you and then later regretted it? Mhm. Do you have any past mistakes you've made that haunt you ever day? Yeppp. Are you bothered by something someone said to you years ago? Yeah, my brain likes to remind me of things like that. Who is the last friend that you lost? I lost the friends I had a few years ago. Do you have anyone who loves and supports you? Yes, my family. ...if not, do you want that? I’m very grateful to have that.
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mcatra · 5 years ago
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Catra works at Burger King pt 3
Tumblr media
catradora in ther modern party clothes!
AO3
pt1/2
Catra was currently studying in the library, trying to work her way through a math problem. 
Her place didn't have internet, so she usually alternated between the school wifi, the public library, and Burger King. Lonnie usually let her study in the break room when the libraries closed up. 
Her phone pings with a message, obviously from Adora. 
Catra picks up her phone and unlocks it, eyebrow raising when she sees the message. 
Adora: 
Wyd? 
Catra sighs. Of course that airheaded jock texted like a frat boy. As much as she wanted to leave her on read, a deal was a deal. 
Catra: 
Studying. 
Adora: 
So diligent! You're so cool, Catra :) 
Adora: 
I'm weightlifting right now! Gotta work off all those BK calories 💪
Great, maybe she will leave her alone to go do her workout. 
Adora: 
[image.attachment]
Catra almost drops her phone when she sees the photo Adora sent. It was a shot of her by the mirror, and she was flexing with a dumbbell. She was wearing a black crop top, which framed her abs perfectly.  What was she doing, getting flustered over what, a gym rat photo that looked like it belonged on a Tinder profile? After much gay panic and debate, Catra takes a photo of herself with her middle finger up to the camera. She taps ‘send’ angrily. 
Catra: 
[image.attachment] 🖕 She doesn't get a response for a few minutes, which was odd. Usually Adora typed back at the speed of lightning. 
Ping. 
Adora: 
wow Ur rlly hot  Catra looks at the text, slack jawed. What the hell? 
Adora: 
Oh my god I am so sorry. That was Glimmer, she took my phone. 
Catra could almost scream, but she was in a public library. She settles for furiously chewing her out, sharp nails flying over the keyboard. 
Catra: 
Plz make Ur excuses more believable. It's so unoriginal I can't even post this on r/OopsDidntMeanTo. 
Adora: 
I really didn't mean to 🥺
Adora: 
I mean 
Adora: 
Glimmer didn't mean to  God, Adora was so stupid. Yet here Catra was, blushing like a fool. When she doesn’t answer for a while, her phone starts pinging again with notifications. 
>Adora liked your photo
>Adora liked your status >Adora reacted to your comment >Adora liked your photo
It goes on for another 23 times and Catra scrolls through it, dumbfounded. Unblocking her was a mistake. 
---- 
As promised, Adora would visit her garage when her shifts were over bringing groceries. In exchange Catra would cook, as it seemed like Adora would burn water if she tried. 
It started off as a weekly thing, but in a true Adora-like fashion it ended up like this everyday. They would talk for hours, catching up on their lost years together. 
Adora talked about all sorts of things, like how hard it was adjusting to the soft beds at first and how she requested a hard one. She told her about the contents of the letters she would send to Catra that never went received. Catra just listened, gratified to hear that Adora missed her in their time apart even half as much as she did. 
They would sing the little songs they invented back when they were kids and make up whole new ones as they waited for the food. Adora even started learning how to cook after watching Catra, and she would barge in uninvited with new recipes. The food tasted better with company, and Adora took great pleasure in piling her seconds. 
Catra would show her the local dumpster and they would go scavenging for items they needed. She taught her how to repair the things they found using Youtube tutorials, and how to disinfect them. It was fun watching Adora try to haggle for prices at the market, or her face when she realized she had to use the outhouse to go to the bathroom at Catra’s. 
Days bleed into months, their easygoing friendship making Catra feel at peace for the first time in forever. 
Right now they were currently in their trial exam period, which functioned both as practice for their final exams and half of their final marks. They were sitting in the library, chatting about their future majors. 
Catra taps a pencil to her chin. ‘Let me guess, you want to do art. No, art history.’
‘Political science, actually! Did you know Eternia University has  the  number one ranked Political Science course in the entire country?' Adora says, flipping through the uni coursebook. 
'Wao, future leader of the free world huh? That's kinda hot.' Catra teases, while Adora swats her in embarrassment. 
'What about you?' 
'Double degree of Law and Social Work.' Catra replies. 'Cliche I know. But I just want to be in a position where I can sue the shit out of Shadow Weaver. The system is corrupt, and there's thousands of kids being abused.' 
'Wow, you're so cool Catra.' Adora says in awe. 'You're so smart, you'd definitely get in.' 
'Damn right.' She scoffs, crossing her arms. 
'You're gonna love Eternia. I went to their open day, the campus is gorgeous. Oh my gosh we could dorm together!' 
'Gross, who'd want to be  your  roommate?' 
'You  would.' 
'Ew, you're so full of yourself. Anyway get off me, I have work soon and I need to get changed.' 
'Ah yes, the cute Burger King apron. I never get tired of it.' 
They would always flirt back and forth like this, but nothing ever came out of it. 
With her friendship came the feelings that she had repressed long ago, unknotting and resurfacing like they had never gone at all. However she had no idea if Adora even liked her in that way, given how affectionate she was with Bow and Glimmer. She was popular with boys and girls alike, but she never dated anyone. Catra never dared to ask. 
Once Adora had fallen asleep in Catra's bed, and the brunette had woken up to the other girls arm around her and their feet tangled together. It reminded her of when they shared the bed as kids, but now they were grown up and this kind of thing didn't have an innocent meaning anymore. Having her there made her heart race and her palms sweaty.
She had wanted to kiss her then. She wanted to kiss her now. Catra wanted every single morning to end up like that. 
-- 
Adora:
Your birthday is soon! Did you want anything?
You  , Catra thinks, like a huge sap. 
Catra:
My sanity back. 
Adora: 
Oh my gosh, we could throw you a party at my place! You’re turning 18 right? We could go out drinking! Angella has this amazing vintage wine collection and I could make cocktails!  
Catra receives another wall of text, basically planning the entirety of this birthday party with Bow being the DJ and how Glimmer could make these buns that were to die for. Adora starts going through the entire party guest list until she has to cut in. 
Catra: 
lol calm down 
Adora: 
Does this mean Ur on board? 🎉
Catra: 
yes fine since you won't shut up about it 
Adora: 
AAAAAAAH YOU'RE THE BEST!!!!!!! ♥️♥️♥️♥️ U WILL NOT REGRET THIS 
DW I WILL PLAN EVERYTHING <3333 
💗💖💖😻
The excessive amount of heart emojis make Catra grin dumbly into her palm. 
She's glad they're not video chatting, or Adora would've already taken a screenshot. 
---
It’s the day of her 18th birthday, and she’s nearing the end of her shift. The best friend squad were waiting for her at their usual table so they could give her a ride. 
‘Hey Catra. Can I speak to you out back?’ Lonnie asks, gesturing outside. 
What the heck, did she do something wrong?  It’s been pretty peaceful as of late, and Catra tries to remember if she had done anything to Kyle recently. She nods, chucking her apron at the back as she tries not to notice Adora’s eyes following her. 
 Catra goes out to the back of the store, the night air nipping at her shoulders. Lonnie waits for her there, biting her lip.
‘What’s up? Don’t tell me you’re giving me a raise.’ Catra jokes. 
Lonnie looks conflicted, and she takes a big breath. 
‘I’m sorry but our store isn’t doing so well. I know you’re turning 18, and that means we can’t afford to keep you on anymore.’
‘What…?’ 
Catra felt numb, like she wasn’t really there in the back alley with Lonnie. It felt like an out of body experience. She could only stare at her, betrayed. 
Like Lonnie could read her mind, she tries to correct herself. ‘It wasn’t my decision, it was Octavia’s.’
Of course it was. Her regional manager was the reason she could never just swipe food while she was working. Octavia never liked her, she always reviewed the security cameras and told her off for goofing around. She must’ve known the door incident was on Catra’s shift, and what really happened despite Adora’s cover up. This ‘layoff’ was just an excuse to get rid of her from a financial standpoint. 
‘Thank you for all your hard work over these past 3 years. I know you’re going through a rough time, so we will of course give you a recommendation.’
Catra just nods. 
She returns to her shift, robotically going through the motions. Catra doesn’t even say anything sassy when Adora asks for a burger with no patty and no onions and no sauce, only cheese on bread.
The lack of a clever comeback to their gag routine has Adora concerned. ‘Are you okay?’ 
Of course she wasn’t. How could she be? She was going to have to vacate her garage space, not like she had anywhere to put her furniture in. What the hell was she going to do? 
‘I’m fine.’ She says, even though tears were threatening to burn a hole in the back of her eyelids. ‘Just...rough day.’ 
‘It’s your birthday! The party will cheer you up.’ Bow says brightly. ‘I have the sickest playlist of all time, you're gonna love it.' 
'My mum isn’t home so we have free reign over the entire house! Come on girl, let's get you changed!' Glimmer crows, too excited about the party to pick up on Catra's mood. 'Makeover time!!' 
The two of them force her into Glimmer's Mercedes, on their way to buy every alcohol imaginable from the bottle shop before they go to her house. 
The last thing Catra wanted to do was play dress up or even go to her party, but Adora had planned for so long for this. It would definitely ruin the entire night if she refused to go. 
Out of all the times they had hung out, she’s never been to Adora’s house. She leans her head against the window when they drive into the fancy part of town, by the lakeside with the multi-million dollar yachts parked in the water. 
That still doesn't prepare Catra for when security lets them in through the black gates to the biggest mansion she’s ever seen. There were fountains, perfectly manicured lawns, a tennis court, and was that  a helicopter pad?! 
It was incredible, she had only seen this kind of luxury in the movies. So Glimmer was rich , rich. No wonder she was put out that Adora had her 18th birthday at Burger King. 
Catra looks at Adora with a dumbfounded expression as the attendants let them in, and the blonde looks almost embarrassed when they have to get into an elevator to go to her room. 
Glimmer picks out a hybrid of clothes from her and Adora's closets. The walk-in wardrobe is huge, like a department store full of designer clothes, shoes, jewellery and bags. 
Her wardrobe alone is the size of Catra's home. The brunette suddenly understands why Adora cried upon seeing her concrete garage space. Looking at it, she wanted to cry too. 
Glimmer sets her down on her huge poster bed as she brings out a checkered crop top, ripped black garter shorts and an expensive looking black leather jacket with a gold trim. While Catra reluctantly gets changed, Glimmer picks out a pair of black strappy heeled boots and a hair straightener to battle the bush on Catra’s head. 
She sits still while Glimmer goes to work on her face, bringing out an entire Sephora’s worth of makeup. When Catra looks in the vanity mirror, she almost doesn’t recognize herself. Her eyes were framed with false eyelashes, a swooping cateye, smokey eyeshadow, sharp contour and her lips were now cherry red with bold lipstick. Glimmer applies the finishing touches with silver rings and clip on piercings. 
She hears Adora inhale with shock from the staircase in her bedroom. 
‘Catra you look incredible !’ She gasps. Adora was wearing this cute backless white dress tied with strings, short enough that it cropped above her knees. She was wearing sparkly wedges to go with it, and her hair was curled instead of her usual ponytail. Her delicate gold sword necklace frames her collarbones. 
Catra’s throat goes dry. ‘Uh- You too.’ 
 Glimmer smirks, satisfied with her work. She gets changed into her own outfit, a short purple tulle lace dress with a white fur trim and a cute Gucci clutch to accompany it. The pink haired girl spritzes them all with her various floral and sea spray scented perfumes before they head back downstairs.
‘Wow you guys look amazing!’ Scorpia marvels, and Adora’s friends voice their approval as well. 
‘Gosh this place is crazy.’ Scorpia whispers to Catra. ‘Did you see their pool? We should’ve just held the swimming carnival here!’ 
Catra opens her mouth to tell her how Lonnie had let her go, but Sea Hawk’s booming voice interrupts them. 
'I challenge you to the ultimate game of BEER PONG!' Sea Hawk announces, spinning the ball on his fingertips. 
Of course this gets everyone's competitive spirit going, and everyone gets into pairs. 
After a few drinks Catra has almost forgotten what she was worrying about earlier, too focused on the buzz. Her and Adora demolish the other teams by a landslide with their impeccable aim. 
Soon the attendants came out with dinner, and it was lavish with every food you could imagine. Lobster, kobe beef, hor d'oeuvres, beluga caviar, kale, and opulent ice cream were all among the plates of food on the table. They bring out a massive 3 tiered truffle cake, the words 'Happy Birthday' written with an oddly crude drawing of Catra. 
'You drew this?' She asks, and Adora nods happily. 'You worked so hard on mine, so.' Catra doesn’t have the heart to tell her that the cake was $7 and the drawing of her forehead was meant as an insult.  They sing the birthday song for her, and this time no one brings up the cake cutting tradition. 
 After dinner they sit outside in the garden around the bonfire Sea Hawk had made. He was drunkenly singing a loud shanty while Bow piled in the wood, fanning the flames. Frosta sips on a mocktail, the only one there who wasn’t old enough to drink yet. The fire flickers and dances, casting shadows around them. 
Catra downs a few more cocktails and jello shots as she waits for Mermista to light up some fireworks. Apparently it was illegal, but Mermista just waved her off, telling her that she’ll just pay the penalty fee as Catra’s birthday gift. Sea Hawk really did rub off on her. 
When she successfully sets them off they light up the sky in dazzling multicoloured sparks. Adora’s friends whoop with glee, taking photos and videos to commemorate the moment. 
Adora's side profile is lit up in the dark, and she looks impossibly beautiful among the backdrop of stars. Longing tears at her chest, Catra wants to hold her hand but her throat feels too tight and she can’t move. The truth was that she knew she had always had feelings for Adora, even back when they were just kids back in the foster home. But like a coward, she could never voice them for fear of Adora leaving her side. 
A loud neighing can be heard from the stables in response to the loud booming noises from the fireworks. 
'Swifty!' Adora says, standing up. The moment's breaks and Catra reels back her hand. 'Stay here, I'll be right back.' 
Her chance disappears, she couldn’t say it after all. She watches her go tend to her horse, feeling stupid. 
‘Yoohoo~, want a rematch?’ Sea Hawk calls out from the patio, pouring vodka into tiny glasses. 
‘Don’t mind if I do.’ Catra replies. She definitely didn’t know her alcohol tolerance levels yet, so it was the perfect time to take that to the test. 
Catra confidently does a whole line of shots, determined to drink herself into unconsciousness. Every time she sees a flash of Lonnie or Adora’s face in her mind, she takes another swig. Everyone is cheering her on, screaming the song ‘Shots’ over and over again, also all drunk out of their minds. Sea Hawk taps out at the 5th drink, and everyone screams at Catra’s flawless victory. Scorpia lifts her into the air to do a victory lap, cheering. 
Adora finally makes an appearance, alerted by the sound of Catra's shrieky laughter as Scorpia swings her around. 
‘Don’t worry, I can take it from here.’ Her school captain says pulling Catra away from her friend. Scorpia just shrugs and makes her way to the food table. ‘Catra, maybe you should slow down.’ Adora tells the giggling girl in her arms. 
‘Noo way.’ She slurs, she was enjoying the feeling too much, the alcohol burning through her body, making her feel lightheaded. The light up disco dancefloor starts to blur into a kaleidoscope of colours. 
‘You got some weed?’ Catra asks, seeing Perfuma light a bowl. The taller girl hands her an already rolled up one and Catra snatches it to take a long drag. The smoke hits her lungs and she starts coughing. 
‘Oi Perfuma, why did you bring drugs? Angella will kill me!' Adora gripes, trying to wrestle the blunt away from Catra. 
‘Aw don't be like that! I made some edibles for you guys to try.’ Perfuma says cheerfully, pointing to the pot brownies. 
‘See? Scorpia likes them.’ She gestures at the other girl, who seemed to be currently tripping out of her mind and eating everything on the table. 
Catra goes to reach for one, but Adora grabs her by the wrist to lead her back inside. 'Alright, you're done for the night. Everyone say bye!' 
‘Byee Catra!’
‘Happy birthday!!’
Adora grabs her by the waist to lead her to her bedroom, Catra wobbling after her in the heels Glimmer lent her. 
'Ugh Adoraaa, don't be such a party pooper. I'm fine.' She moans, leaning heavily on the other girl. 'Don't you have a shift tomorrow afternoon? I don't want you getting hungover or drug tested.' Adora chides, rummaging around the dark for the light switch. 
Catra snorts. 'Oh you don't have to worry about  that  anymore. Got laid off.' 
Adora looks at her in confusion, until realization dawns on her. 'Wait, is that why Lonnie took you outside?' 
'Say, I never got to give you  your  birthday gift.' Catra pushes her hair back, voice sultry as she flings off her jacket. She never pinned herself down as a horny drunk, but here they were. Catra shoves Adora onto the bed, straddling her. Her golden hair spills over the mattress, soft like spun silk. 
'You still want that kiss?' Catra whispers in Adora's now burning red ear. 'My knife touched the bottom.' 
Adora's face now resembled a fire truck, mouth gaping in shock.
'C-Catra, I…' 
Catra presses their lips together, silencing her. She knows she probably tastes like alcohol and weed right now, but she couldn't care less in the moment. Adora's mouth is still slack jawed from mortification, so she takes the opportunity for tongue. She frowns and moves down to her neck when Adora doesn’t return the kiss. 
'Catra, what are you doing-' 
Catra bites down on Adora's nape. The blonde underneath her lets out a soft gasp, arching her back. Her gold manicured nails dig into her shoulder. 
'Stop, you're not thinking straight-!' 
'Sure ain't.' Catra grins, licking a stripe down the base of her neck. Adora’s necklace chain jingles with the movement. There was now an impressive hickey there, blooming violet on her pale skin. She pauses to admire her handiwork. 
'This isn't you talking, you'll, you'll regret this in the morning.' Adora stutters. She's shivering, their hands now laced together, silver rings clanking. 
'I know. I don't care.' She replies, kissing her again. Adora's teeth nick her lip. The alcohol in her system makes her feel lightheaded, confident. No way would she have managed this sober. Adora tastes better than she does, sweet like blueberry soju. Catra's hands wander down further, pulling the strings to untie the back of her dress-
'Catra stop!'  Adora suddenly shouts, striking Catra across the cheek in a deafening  slap . 
Adora's eyes were blazing, almost teary in the dark. Her breathing was irregular, panting in and out. Catra stills, clutching her cheek. The look in her eyes sobered her immediately. 
Adora looks down at her palm, realizing what she just did. 'Sorry for hitting you!' She flounders. 'It's just that, you're only doing this because you’re drunk and upset, right?’
Catra just stares at her before climbing off. Cold realization settles as the fog in her brain clears. 'You're right. Forget it.' 
She sits on the edge of the bed, numbly watching Adora hurriedly trying to re-tie the back of her now wrinkled dress. Her lips are stained with Catra’s red lipstick. Adora catches her looking, and she quickly turns away to smooth down her hair with her fingers. 'You've had more than enough to drink tonight. I’ll get you some water to clear your head.’
She gets up to turn on the light switch, and Catra blinks in the harsh light from the chandeliers.  ‘Come on, let’s get you sobered up, okay?’ Adora leads her to the kitchen on the same floor, gingerly placing her friend on the slippery bar stool. 
The blonde goes to get the chilled jug of infused water from the fridge and pours it into a glass. Adora slides it across the island, and Catra reluctantly takes it. She sips at it, mint and lemon on her tongue. It tasted way better than her hose water. 
‘I’ll uh, pick out some groceries for you since we’re here and all.’ Adora says awkwardly into the silence, turning around to rummage through her pantry. 
Suddenly Catra is brought back to the whole reason why she was sitting here in this oversized mansion in the first place. Their friendship agreement. The one she had just violated. Catra had never felt more stupid to mistake Adora’s kindness and guilt for actual feelings. She felt like a charity case, waiting to collect food from the soup kitchen.
Of course Adora didn't like her back. She just saw her as someone needing to be saved. The product of survival guilt. Catra wanted to whack her head on the corner of her marbled countertop and not wake up. 
Adora takes out a green plastic bag, and starts filling it with everything and anything she can get. Cans, pasta, biscuits, fruits and vegetables. Actually this feeling was more like being one of those poor kids that white girls would pose next to for their Instagram after their trip to Africa.  Did Adora have fun, volunteering to slum it up in her place while she returned here? All she ever wanted her entire life was to be Adora’s equal. 
Scorpia and Sea Hawk's loud laughter and DJ music can be heard downstairs in the garden, beyond the tall golden trimmed windows. The class difference between them stretched like an unfathomable canyon. Living the classy bougie dream until the clock struck midnight and she was back in her run down garage. Except soon she won’t even have that anymore. Why did Adora have to bring her here? It was almost cruel. 
Catra's suddenly overcome with the urge to vomit. She nearly falls off the high chair in her rush to throw up the unholy cocktail of alcohol into the sink. Tears bead in her eyes from the sour taste as she continues to vomit out everything she ate that night. She can feel Adora by her side, patting her back reassuringly.
It was by far the worst birthday she has ever had. 
 --
The morning of, Catra woke up in Adora’s bed with a splitting headache. 
Unfortunately she was  not given the gift of amnesia, as she vividly remembered every last excruciating detail about last night. 
She spots Adora’s mop of blonde hair under a blanket on the floor, even though there were a billion other free spare rooms to sleep in. Adora was probably too afraid to share the same bed as her now.
Catra’s borrowed crop top digs uncomfortably into her skin, and she angrily flings it off her body. The shorts stick to her like a second skin, smelling of tequila. She grabs her old Burger King uniform and puts it on, though even this didn’t belong to her now. 
Adora shifts in her sleep, and Catra lightly steps over her to get to the door. The last thing she wanted was for Adora to wake up. 
As soon as she’s out, she runs out to the elevator and bangs frantically on the buttons until it sends her to the bottom floor. The lift opens with a  ding  and in her haste she almost crashes headfirst into Glimmer. 
‘Oh hey! Are you going to work?’ Glimmer greets. She was in her silk pajamas and slippers, holding a glass of orange juice. 
‘Uh. Yeah.’ Catra lies, trying her best to look natural. 
‘Some party last night huh? Lucky today is a Saturday.’ Glimmer says conversationally, unaware of Catra’s urge to throw her across the room. ‘Hey, what happened to your cheek?’
Catra clutches her face, it still strung from where Adora struck her. ‘Nothing.’
Glimmer raises an eyebrow. ‘Well anyway, did you wanna stick around for  breakfast? The cooks made pancakes, bacon, eggs, the whole deal.' She peeks behind Catra. 'Is Adora  still  not up yet?’ 
As much as Catra wanted to scream  get out of my way she schools her expression to her best customer service smile. ‘Nope she’s still sleeping it off. Anyway I’m gonna be late so I can’t stick around.’
‘Did you need a lift?’ Glimmer asks. It dawns on the brunette she couldn’t exactly run the entire way back home. ‘I’ll ask one of the drivers to take you back so you make it to your shift.’
Catra thanks her lucky stars that Glimmer was still too hungover to drive her. She wouldn’t have been able to dodge her questions if she had. 
‘Yes please.’ Catra says, giddy with relief. ‘Thank you.’ 
‘Ooh and before I forget, Adora told me last night to give you this.’ Glimmer says, grabbing the green bag of groceries off the counter. The shorter girl bundles it into Catra’s arms before she can object. 
‘Get home safe.’ She says, waving as the attendant leads her out the door. 
Catra looks down at the cans of food in her arms and doesn’t say anything.  
 ------
The days leading up to graduation were painful, to say the least. 
They more or less pretend the kiss didn't happen. Adora never brings it up, and neither does Catra. 
She would stare at the ceiling, wishing she had never gotten piss drunk at her birthday and kissed her. Adora was right, she did regret it. It was awful, the look on Adora's face when she slapped Catra replays in her mind and nightmares over and over again. It was mortifying. 
Adora still messages her every 3 days, and Catra still replies, though her words are empty and devoid of banter.  I'm worried about you,  she says.  I'm fine , Catra always responds. 
The brunette continues to humour her to keep the peace, only shutting down when her old job was mentioned. Catra doesn’t allow Adora back into her home again. 
Sometimes they study together, but she can't concentrate when Adora wears her glasses. Her heart hurts, so she cradles her cheek and tries not to remember. 
The hickey she had branded Adora's neck with had been covered with foundation until it faded away. None of her friends had teased her about it, so she clearly had not told a single soul what had happened. 
Catra bites at the scab on her lip from where Adora’s teeth nicked her until it bleeds. She wants to apologize, but the words stick on her tongue and she can't bring herself to talk about that night. 
Catra knew Adora was only here by her side to alleviate her guilt. Shame buries itself under her skin every time she's near her, like she was too embarrassed to even exist in the same space as Adora. She wants to disappear. 
Exams are hard, and without an internet connection after the library closes at 6pm made it difficult to study. In her heart she knew she wasn't going to come out on top. Her ranking had slipped, she wasn't even at second place anymore. Rent was due at the end of the month, and without her Burger King wage she knew she'll be kicked out sooner than later. 
Catra felt stressed and self destructive, and the only thing that kept her from falling off the edge completely was Scorpia. As much as she hated depending on others, she'd much rather her old coworker than Adora. 
Her classmates seemed to like this new, muted down version of Catra who didn't argue and just stayed quiet most of the time. Fighting back was too difficult when all she wanted to do was blend into the wallpaper. All they talked about was where they were going for vacation after graduation, and Catra certainly had nothing to contribute to that conversation.
She felt like crying, all the time. It was agony, wanting to burst out into tears randomly while she sat wasting away in the student council room. Despite herself, she missed Burger King, and she just kept getting ghosted or rejected in her other job applications. Sometimes when she really wanted to indulge herself, she'd go cry silently in the school toilet stall. 
Glimmer notices the change, and she catches her glaring. 'You don't seem as alive lately. Your eye bags are huge.' 
'S'fine.' Catra replies, hiding her hands so she doesn't see how they shake. Honestly Catra couldn't remember the last time she slept.
'Pfft, don't lie to me. Adora's worried about you. You're getting skinnier, and your eyes are always raw. All you do is stare into space.' 
Catra bites down on her nails. Of course she knew that. But she's gone through this before, and she'll do it again. 
'What happened between you two?’ 
‘None of your business.’ Catra replies, shuffling her way to the hall. 
--
 Their graduation ceremony starts off uneventfully. Every student’s parents except Catra’s sit proudly in the audience, eager to watch their kid graduate. One by one they receive their certificate and return to their seats. 
Adora and Catra stand side by side onstage, as Adora makes their final speech as School Captain. Through the blinding lights, she sees Angella waving proudly at her adoptive daughter in the crowd. 
Catra looks at Adora in the corner of her eye. She must look pathetic, lovesick and pining after someone she couldn’t have. 
‘It’s been such an honour serving the entire faculty and students of this school. I couldn’t have done it without my amazing Vice-Captain and all of my prefects. Now I’m proud to hand over my badge to the next School Captain, Frosta.’ 
They go through the rest of the ceremony like that, each member of the student council handing their badges to their successors. 
Soon their Principal comes up to the podium, tapping it once and clearing her throat. 
‘Announcing our honor student, and the winner of the scholarship to Eternia University…’ Castaspella says, turning over the sign card. 
‘None other than our school captain, Adora!’
Everyone starts clapping, and Adora walks across the stage to shake Castaspella's hand. 
Sounded about right. Catra never won against Adora in her entire life. She had already expected this outcome. Like a game of cat and mouse, going over and over for all eternity. 
Adora would excel with her elite education and secure a well paying job. Catra would struggle at the bottom indefinitely, never amounting to anything. She never would, if Adora was still there next to her. When the blonde re-entered her life, everything she had been working towards for years just collapsed. Her job, her home, her School Captain status, her chance at the scholarship, her sanity. 
She had to be wiped clean. A fresh start. 
The flower petals were falling, the streets decorated with a vibrant pink. The other students mill out of the crowd with their parents, chatting excitedly about what was next in their futures. She waits for Adora underneath a tree.  
'Congratulations.' Catra says, when she finally spots the other girl in the crowd. Adora pulls away from Angella’s embrace to meet her. 
'You deserve this so much more than I do.' Adora says, her voice pained like she didn't just win a full ride to her dream university. 'You should take it.'
'It's in your name, silly.' Catra replies, lightly tapping her with her rolled up certificate.
'Besides, I knew you'd get into Eternia, so I never applied.'
Adora blinks dumbly. '...What? Aren’t we going to the same university?’ 
She always was a bit slow on the uptake. ‘Only  you  decided that, stuupid. Say, it's about time we ended this right?' 
‘Catra, what are you...' 
'Our deal. You don't need to feel guilty anymore or bring me anything.' Catra says, her voice sounding like it didn't belong to her. She rummages in her bag, bringing out Adora's spare varsity jacket that she hadn’t returned. 'Here, take this. Thank you for all the help.' 
'What do you mean? You want to stop being friends?' Adora says in disbelief, taking the jacket.  
Catra nods. ‘I can’t continue with the arrangement. I hope you understand.’ 
‘I don’t! Was I the only one who thought we were friends, real ones?’ Adora asks.
‘...That’s right. I never saw you as a friend. You were just a meal ticket to me. Are you happy now?’ Catra snaps back. Shit, that wasn’t what she meant to say. She had planned to end this quickly and painlessly, on a high note.  Trust Adora to put up a fight. 
Something seems to click in Adora’s brain. ‘Is this about the night of the party?’
‘Figure that out yourself.’ Catra replies, turning to walk away. 
Adora grabs onto her arm. ‘Wait! If- if that’s what you want, I’ll give it! Just don't go!' 
This dumb blonde really was offering up her body, out of what? A sense of duty? How stupid. 
‘Is that right?’ Catra says, walking closer to her. Adora backs up until she is pinned to the tree. They’re face to face now. 
‘Can you really do this?’ Catra lifts Adora’s chin by a finger. 
Finally it seems to dawn on Adora exactly what Catra wanted. She swallows, biting her lip. 
There’s a flicker of hesitation, before Adora’s eyes squeeze shut defiantly. The blonde is shaking like a leaf, her breath coming out in panicked stutters from her pursed lips. 
Catra just stares at Adora’s scrunched up face impassively. Her scared reaction was the only confirmation she needed for closure. 
She flicks the other girl’s forehead, and her big blue eyes open in confusion. ‘Chill out, I’m not that evil to do it to someone so unwilling.’
 Adora blinks, clutching her forehead. ‘Catra?’
Suddenly Angella’s voice cuts through their conversation from the car park. ‘Adora dear, are you done chatting with your friend? We have reservations!'
‘Um, I…’ Her old school captain opens her mouth to say something, but Angella's started to lose her patience. 'Adora, how long are you going to stand there? Glimmer is already waiting for us at the restaurant!' 
Catra just smiles tiredly. ‘Take care, dummy.’ 
She watches Adora being dragged off unwillingly by her adoptive mother to the car. 
Catra lets out a sigh. Her phone pings with a message from Scorpia, and she knows it's time to go. 
---
 By the time Angella releases her from their graduation celebration, Adora can feel that it's already too late.
 Adora: 
Please, can we talk? Let me fix this
A pop up appears over the screen. 
Message Not Sent
This person isn't receiving messages at this time. 
Adora sends another message, but they all go undelivered. Catra had blocked her again. Panic spikes through her veins, and she quickly dons on a jacket and grabs her car keys. 
She sneaks out that night, down the familiar winding path through the bush that led to Catra's place. 
'Catra?' She rolls up the garage door, blinking in the darkness. When her eyes adjusted, she found Catra's old home completely emptied. 
All the furniture and items her friend had collected over the years, they were all gone. The little stove where they cooked, the old mattress where they talked late into the night, all vanished like they were never there. 
A single green plastic bag remained on the floor untouched, filled to the brim of food. 
     catra working at BK fanart: 
https://twitter.com/huetrooper/status/1265188930741080064
https://twitter.com/quackelroys/status/1271199987540668416?s=20
https://mcatra.tumblr.com/post/620493235561824256/your-catra-works-at-burger-king-fic-is-great-you
 pt1, pt 2
Catra was currently studying in the library, trying to work her way through a math problem. 
Her place didn't have internet, so she usually alternated between the school wifi, the public library, and Burger King. Lonnie usually let her study in the break room when the libraries closed up. 
Her phone pings with a message, obviously from Adora. 
Catra picks up her phone and unlocks it, eyebrow raising when she sees the message. 
Adora: 
Wyd? 
Catra sighs. Of course that airheaded jock texted like a frat boy. As much as she wanted to leave her on read, a deal was a deal. 
Catra: 
Studying. 
Adora: 
So diligent! You're so cool, Catra :) 
Adora: 
I'm weightlifting right now! Gotta work off all those BK calories 💪
Great, maybe she will leave her alone to go do her workout. 
Adora: 
[image.attachment]
Catra almost drops her phone when she sees the photo Adora sent. It was a shot of her by the mirror, and she was flexing with a dumbbell. She was wearing a black crop top, which framed her abs perfectly. 
What was she doing, getting flustered over what, a gym rat photo that looked like it belonged on a Tinder profile? 
After much gay panic and debate, Catra takes a photo of herself with her middle finger up to the camera. She taps ‘send’ angrily. 
Catra: 
[image.attachment] 🖕
She doesn't get a response for a few minutes, which was odd. Usually Adora typed back at the speed of lightning. 
Ping. 
Adora: 
wow Ur rlly hot 
Catra looks at the text, slack jawed. What the hell? 
Adora: 
Oh my god I am so sorry. That was Glimmer, she took my phone. 
Catra could almost scream, but she was in a public library. She settles for furiously chewing her out, sharp nails flying over the keyboard. 
Catra: 
Plz make Ur excuses more believable. It's so unoriginal I can't even post this on r/OopsDidntMeanTo. 
Adora: 
I really didn't mean to 🥺
Adora: 
I mean 
Adora: 
Glimmer didn't mean to 
God, Adora was so stupid. Yet here Catra was, blushing like a fool. When she doesn’t answer for a while, her phone starts pinging again with notifications. 
>Adora liked your photo
>Adora liked your status >Adora reacted to your comment >Adora liked your photo
It goes on for another 23 times and Catra scrolls through it, dumbfounded. Unblocking her was  a mistake. 
---- 
As promised, Adora would visit her garage when her shifts were over bringing groceries. In exchange Catra would cook, as it seemed like Adora would burn water if she tried. 
It started off as a weekly thing, but in a true Adora-like fashion it ended up like this everyday. They would talk for hours, catching up on their lost years together. 
Adora talked about all sorts of things, like how hard it was adjusting to the soft beds at first and how she requested a hard one. She told her about the contents of the letters she would send to Catra that never went received. Catra just listened, gratified to hear that Adora missed her in their time apart even half as much as she did. 
They would sing the little songs they invented back when they were kids and make up whole new ones as they waited for the food. Adora even started learning how to cook after watching Catra, and she would barge in uninvited with new recipes. The food tasted better with company, and Adora took great pleasure in piling her seconds. 
Catra would show her the local dumpster and they would go scavenging for items they needed. She taught her how to repair the things they found using Youtube tutorials, and how to disinfect them. It was fun watching Adora try to haggle for prices at the market, or her face when she realized she had to use the outhouse to go to the bathroom at Catra’s. 
Days bleed into months, their easygoing friendship making Catra feel at peace for the first time in forever. 
Right now they were currently in their trial exam period, which functioned both as practice for their final exams and half of their final marks. They were sitting in the library, chatting about their future majors. 
Catra taps a pencil to her chin. ‘Let me guess, you want to do art. No, art history.’
‘Political science, actually! Did you know Eternia University has the number one ranked Political Science course in the entire country?' Adora says, flipping through the uni coursebook. 
'Wao, future leader of the free world huh? That's kinda hot.' Catra teases, while Adora swats her in embarrassment. 
'What about you?' 
'Double degree of Law and Social Work.' Catra replies. 'Cliche I know. But I just want to be in a position where I can sue the shit out of Shadow Weaver. The system is corrupt, and there's thousands of kids being abused.' 
'Wow, you're so cool Catra.' Adora says in awe. 'You're so smart, you'd definitely get in.' 
'Damn right.' She scoffs, crossing her arms. 
'You're gonna love Eternia. I went to their open day, the campus is gorgeous. Oh my gosh we could dorm together!' 
'Gross, who'd want to be your roommate?' 
'You would.' 
'Ew, you're so full of yourself. Anyway get off me, I have work soon and I need to get changed.' 
'Ah yes, the cute Burger King apron. I never get tired of it.' 
They would always flirt back and forth like this, but nothing ever came out of it. 
With her friendship came the feelings that she had repressed long ago, unknotting and resurfacing like they had never gone at all. However she had no idea if Adora even liked her in that way, given how affectionate she was with Bow and Glimmer. She was popular with boys and girls alike, but she never dated anyone. Catra never dared to ask. 
Once Adora had fallen asleep in Catra's bed, and the brunette had woken up to the other girls arm around her and their feet tangled together. It reminded her of when they shared the bed as kids, but now they were grown up and this kind of thing didn't have an innocent meaning anymore. Having her there made her heart race and her palms sweaty.
She had wanted to kiss her then. She wanted to kiss her now. Catra wanted every single morning to end up like that. 
-- 
Adora:
Your birthday is soon! Did you want anything?
You, Catra thinks, like a huge sap. 
Catra:
My sanity back. 
Adora: 
Oh my gosh, we could throw you a party at my place! You’re turning 18 right? We could go out drinking! Angella has this amazing vintage wine collection and I could make cocktails!  
Catra receives another wall of text, basically planning the entirety of this birthday party with Bow being the DJ and how Glimmer could make these buns that were to die for. Adora starts going through the entire party guest list until she has to cut in. 
Catra: 
lol calm down 
Adora: 
Does this mean Ur on board? 🎉
Catra: 
yes fine since you won't shut up about it 
Adora: 
AAAAAAAH YOU'RE THE BEST!!!!!!! ♥️♥️♥️♥️ U WILL NOT REGRET THIS 
DW I WILL PLAN EVERYTHING <3333 
💗💖💖😻
The excessive amount of heart emojis make Catra grin dumbly into her palm. 
She's glad they're not video chatting, or Adora would've already taken a screenshot. 
---
It’s the day of her 18th birthday, and she’s nearing the end of her shift. The best friend squad were waiting for her at their usual table so they could give her a ride. 
‘Hey Catra. Can I speak to you out back?’ Lonnie asks, gesturing outside. 
What the heck, did she do something wrong? It’s been pretty peaceful as of late, and Catra tries to remember if she had done anything to Kyle recently. She nods, chucking her apron at the back as she tries not to notice Adora’s eyes following her. 
Catra goes out to the back of the store, the night air nipping at her shoulders. Lonnie waits for her there, biting her lip.
‘What’s up? Don’t tell me you’re giving me a raise.’ Catra jokes. 
Lonnie looks conflicted, and she takes a big breath. 
‘I’m sorry but our store isn’t doing so well. I know you’re turning 18, and that means we can’t afford to keep you on anymore.’
‘What…’ 
Catra felt numb, like she wasn’t really there in the back alley with Lonnie. It felt like an out of body experience. She could only stare at her, betrayed. 
Like Lonnie could read her mind, she tries to correct herself. ‘It wasn’t my decision, it was Octavia’s.’
Of course it was. Her regional manager was the reason she could never just swipe food while she was working. Octavia never liked her, she always reviewed the security cameras and told her off for goofing around. She must’ve known the door incident was on Catra’s shift, and what really happened despite Adora’s cover up. This ‘layoff’ was just an excuse to get rid of her from a financial standpoint. 
‘Thank you for all your hard work over these past 3 years. I know you’re going through a rough time, so we will of course give you a recommendation.’
Catra just nods. 
She returns to her shift, robotically going through the motions. Catra doesn’t even say anything sassy when Adora asks for a burger with no patty and no onions and no sauce, only cheese on bread.
The lack of a clever comeback to their gag routine has Adora concerned. ‘Are you okay?’ 
Of course she wasn’t. How could she be? She was going to have to vacate her garage space, not like she had anywhere to put her furniture in. What the hell was she going to do? 
‘I’m fine.’ She says, even though tears were threatening to burn a hole in the back of her eyelids. ‘Just...rough day.’ 
‘It’s your birthday! The party will cheer you up.’ Bow says brightly. ‘I have the sickest playlist of all time, you're gonna love it.' 
'My mum isn’t home so we have free reign over the entire house! Come on girl, let's get you changed!' Glimmer crows, too excited about the party to pick up on Catra's mood. 'Makeover time!!' 
The two of them force her into Glimmer's Mercedes, on their way to buy every alcohol imaginable from the bottle shop before they go to her house. 
The last thing Catra wanted to do was play dress up or even go to her party, but Adora had planned for so long for this. It would definitely ruin the entire night if she refused to go. 
Out of all the times they had hung out, she’s never been to Adora’s house. She leans her head against the window when they drive into the fancy part of town, by the lakeside with the multi-million dollar yachts parked in the water. 
That still doesn't prepare Catra for when security lets them in through the black gates to the biggest mansion she’s ever seen. There were fountains, perfectly manicured lawns, a tennis court, and was that a helicopter pad?! 
It was incredible, Catra could only walk in a daze with her jaw dropped on their polished marble floors. So Glimmer was rich, rich. No wonder she was put out that Adora had her 18th birthday at Burger King. 
Catra looks at Adora with a dumbfounded expression, and the blonde looks almost embarrassed when they have to get into an elevator to go to her room. 
Glimmer picks out a hybrid of clothes from her and Adora's closets. The walk-in wardrobe is huge, like a department store full of designer clothes, shoes, jewellery and bags. 
Her wardrobe alone is the size of Catra's home. The brunette suddenly understands why Adora cried upon seeing her concrete garage space. Looking at it, she wanted to cry too. 
Glimmer sets her down on her huge poster bed as she brings out a checkered crop top, ripped black garter shorts and an expensive looking black leather jacket with a gold trim. While Catra reluctantly gets changed, Glimmer picks out a pair of black strappy heeled boots and a hair straightener to battle the bush on Catra’s head. 
She sits still while Glimmer goes to work on her face, bringing out an entire Sephora’s worth of makeup. When Catra looks in the vanity mirror, she almost doesn’t recognize herself. Her eyes were framed with false eyelashes, a swooping cateye, smokey eyeshadow, sharp contour and her lips were now cherry red with bold lipstick. Glimmer applies the finishing touches with silver rings and clip on piercings. 
She hears Adora inhale with shock from the staircase in her bedroom. 
‘Catra you look incredible!’ She gasps. Adora was wearing this cute backless white dress tied with strings, short enough that it cropped above her knees. She was wearing sparkly wedges to go with it, and her hair was curled instead of her usual ponytail. Her delicate gold sword necklace frames her collarbones. 
Catra’s throat goes dry. ‘Uh- You too.’ 
Glimmer smirks, satisfied with her work. She gets changed into her own outfit, a short purple tulle lace dress with a white fur trim and a cute Gucci clutch to accompany it. The pink haired girl spritzes them all with her various floral and sea spray scented perfumes before they head back downstairs.
‘Wow you guys look amazing!’ Scorpia marvels, and Adora’s friends voice their approval as well.
‘Gosh this place is crazy.’ Scorpia whispers to Catra. ‘Did you see their pool? We should’ve just held the swimming carnival here!’ 
Catra opens her mouth to tell her how Lonnie had let her go, but Sea Hawk’s booming voice interrupts them. 
'I challenge you to the ultimate game of BEER PONG!' Sea Hawk announces, spinning the ball on his fingertips. 
Of course this gets everyone's competitive spirit going, and everyone gets into pairs. 
After a few drinks Catra has almost forgotten what she was worrying about earlier, too focused on the buzz. Her and Adora demolish the other teams by a landslide with their impeccable aim. 
Soon the attendants came out with dinner, and it was lavish with every food you could imagine. Lobster, kobe beef, hor d'oeuvres, beluga caviar, kale, and opulent ice cream were all among the plates of food on the table.
They bring out a massive 3 tiered truffle cake, the words 'Happy Birthday' written with an oddly crude drawing of Catra. 
'You drew this?' She asks, and Adora nods happily. 'You worked so hard on mine, so.' Catra doesn’t have the heart to tell her that the cake was $7 and the drawing of her forehead was meant as an insult. 
They sing the birthday song for her, and this time no one brings up the cake cutting tradition. 
After dinner they sit outside in the garden around the bonfire Sea Hawk had made. He was drunkenly singing a loud shanty while Bow piled in the wood, fanning the flames. Frosta sips on a mocktail, the only one there who wasn’t old enough to drink yet. The fire flickers and dances, casting shadows around them. 
Catra downs a few more cocktails and jello shots as she waits for Mermista to light up some fireworks. Apparently it was illegal, but Mermista just waved her off, telling her that she’ll just pay the penalty fee as Catra’s birthday gift. Sea Hawk really did rub off on her. 
When she successfully sets them off they light up the sky in dazzling multicoloured sparks. Adora’s friends whoop with glee, taking photos and videos to commemorate the moment. 
Adora's side profile is lit up in the dark, and she looks impossibly beautiful among the backdrop of stars. Longing tears at her chest, Catra wants to hold her hand but her throat feels too tight and she can’t move. The truth was that she knew she had always had feelings for Adora, even back when they were just kids back in the foster home. But like a coward, she could never voice them for fear of Adora leaving her side. 
A loud neighing can be heard from the stables in response to the loud booming noises from the fireworks. 
'Swifty!' Adora says, standing up. The moment's breaks and Catra reels back her hand. 'Stay here, I'll be right back.' 
Her chance disappears, she couldn’t say it after all. She watches her go tend to her horse, feeling stupid. 
‘Yoohoo~, want a rematch?’ Sea Hawk calls out from the patio, pouring vodka into tiny glasses. 
‘Don’t mind if I do.’ Catra replies. She definitely didn’t know her alcohol tolerance levels yet, so it was the perfect time to take that to the test. 
Catra confidently does a whole line of shots, determined to drink herself into unconsciousness. Every time she sees a flash of Lonnie or Adora’s face in her mind, she takes another swig. Everyone is cheering her on, screaming the song ‘Shots’ over and over again, also all drunk out of their minds. Sea Hawk taps out at the 5th drink, and everyone screams at Catra’s flawless victory. Scorpia lifts her into the air to do a victory lap, cheering. 
Adora finally makes an appearance, alerted by the sound of Catra's shrieky laughter as Scorpia swings her around. 
‘Don’t worry, I can take it from here.’ Her school captain says pulling Catra away from her friend. Scorpia just shrugs and makes her way to the food table.
‘Catra, maybe you should slow down.’ Adora tells the giggling girl in her arms. 
‘Noo way.’ She slurs, she was enjoying the feeling too much, the alcohol burning through her body, making her feel lightheaded. The light up disco dancefloor starts to blur into a kaleidoscope of colours. 
‘You got some weed?’ Catra asks, seeing Perfuma light a bowl. The taller girl hands her an already rolled up one and Catra snatches it to take a long drag. The smoke hits her lungs and she starts coughing. 
‘Oi Perfuma, why did you bring drugs? Angella will kill me!' Adora gripes, trying to wrestle the blunt away from Catra. 
‘Aw don't be like that! I made some edibles for you guys to try.’ Perfuma says cheerfully, pointing to the pot brownies. 
‘See? Scorpia likes them.’ She gestures at the other girl, who seemed to be currently tripping out of her mind and eating everything on the table. 
Catra goes to reach for one, but Adora grabs her by the wrist to lead her back inside. 'Alright, you're done for the night. Everyone say bye!' 
‘Byee Catra!’
‘Happy birthday!!’
Adora grabs her by the waist to lead her to her bedroom, Catra wobbling after her in the heels Glimmer lent her. 
'Ugh Adoraaa, don't be such a party pooper. I'm fine.' She moans, leaning heavily on the other girl. 'Don't you have a shift tomorrow afternoon? I don't want you getting hungover or drug tested.' Adora chides, rummaging around the dark for the light switch. 
Catra snorts. 'Oh you don't have to worry about that anymore. Got laid off.' 
Adora looks at her in confusion, until realization dawns on her. 'Wait, is that why Lonnie took you outside?' 
'Say, I never got to give you your birthday gift.' Catra pushes her hair back, voice sultry as she flings off her jacket. She never pinned herself down as a horny drunk, but here they were. Catra shoves Adora onto the bed, straddling her. Her golden hair spills over the mattress, soft like spun silk. 
'You still want that kiss?' Catra whispers in Adora's now burning red ear. 'My knife touched the bottom.' 
Adora's face now resembled a fire truck, mouth gaping in shock.
'C-Catra, I…' 
Catra presses their lips together, silencing her. She knows she probably tastes like alcohol and weed right now, but she couldn't care less in the moment. Adora's mouth is still slack jawed from mortification, so she takes the opportunity for tongue. She frowns and moves down to her neck when Adora doesn’t return the kiss. 
'Catra, what are you doing-' 
Catra bites down on Adora's nape. The blonde underneath her lets out a soft gasp, arching her back. Her gold manicured nails dig into her shoulder. 
'Stop, you're not thinking straight-!' 
'Sure ain't.' Catra grins, licking a stripe down the base of her neck. Adora’s necklace chain jingles with the movement. There was now an impressive hickey there, blooming violet on her pale skin. She pauses to admire her handiwork. 
'This isn't you talking, you'll, you'll regret this in the morning.' Adora stutters. She's shivering, their hands now laced together, silver rings clanking. 
 'I know. I don't care.' She replies, kissing her again. Adora's teeth nick her lip. The alcohol in her system makes her feel lightheaded, confident. No way would she have managed this sober. Adora tastes better than she does, sweet like blueberry soju. Catra's hands wander down further, pulling the strings to untie the back of her dress-
'Catra stop!' Adora suddenly shouts, striking Catra across the cheek in a deafening slap. 
Adora's eyes were blazing, almost teary in the dark. Her breathing was irregular, panting in and out. Catra stills, clutching her cheek. The look in her eyes sobered her immediately. 
Adora looks down at her palm, realizing what she just did. 'Sorry for hitting you!' She flounders. 'It's just that, you're only doing this because you’re drunk and upset, right?’
Catra just stares at her before climbing off. Cold realization settles as the fog in her brain clears. 'You're right. Forget it.' 
She sits on the edge of the bed, numbly watching Adora hurriedly trying to re-tie the back of her now wrinkled dress. Her lips are stained with Catra’s red lipstick. 
Adora catches her looking, and she quickly turns away to smooth down her hair with her fingers. 'You've had more than enough to drink tonight. I’ll get you some water to clear your head.’
She gets up to turn on the light switch, and Catra blinks in the harsh light from the chandeliers. 
‘Come on, let’s get you sobered up, okay?’ Adora leads her to the kitchen on the same floor, gingerly placing her friend on the slippery bar stool. 
The blonde goes to get the chilled jug of infused water from the fridge and pours it into a glass. Adora slides it across the island, and Catra reluctantly takes it. She sips at it, mint and lemon on her tongue. It tasted way better than her hose water. 
‘I’ll uh, pick out some groceries for you since we’re here and all.’ Adora says awkwardly into the silence, turning around to rummage through her pantry. 
Suddenly Catra is brought back to the whole reason why she was sitting here in this oversized mansion in the first place. Their friendship agreement. The one she had just violated. Catra had never felt more stupid to mistake Adora’s kindness and guilt for actual feelings. She felt like a charity case, waiting to collect food from the soup kitchen.
Of course Adora didn't like her back. She just saw her as someone needing to be saved. The product of survival guilt. Catra wanted to whack her head on the corner of her marbled countertop and not wake up. 
Adora takes out a green plastic bag, and starts filling it with everything and anything she can get. Cans, pasta, biscuits, fruits and vegetables. Actually this feeling was more like being one of those poor kids that white girls would pose next to for their Instagram after their trip to Africa. 
Did Adora have fun, volunteering to slum it up in her place while she returned here? All she ever wanted her entire life was to be Adora’s equal. 
Scorpia and Sea Hawk's loud laughter and DJ music can be heard downstairs in the garden, beyond the tall golden trimmed windows. The class difference between them stretched like an unfathomable canyon. Living the classy bougie dream until the clock struck midnight and she was back in her run down garage. Except soon she won’t even have that anymore. Why did Adora have to bring her here? It was almost cruel. 
Catra's suddenly overcome with the urge to vomit. She nearly falls off the high chair in her rush to throw up the unholy cocktail of alcohol into the sink. Tears bead in her eyes from the sour taste as she continues to vomit out everything she ate that night. She can feel Adora by her side, patting her back reassuringly.
It was by far the worst birthday she has ever had. 
--
The morning of, Catra woke up in Adora’s bed with a splitting headache. 
Unfortunately she was not given the gift of amnesia, as she vividly remembered every last excruciating detail about last night. 
She spots Adora’s mop of blonde hair under a blanket on the floor, even though there were a billion other free spare rooms to sleep in. Adora was probably too afraid to share the same bed as her now.
Catra’s borrowed crop top digs uncomfortably into her skin, and she angrily flings it off her body. The shorts stick to her like a second skin, smelling of tequila. She grabs her old Burger King uniform and puts it on, though even this didn’t belong to her now. 
Adora shifts in her sleep, and Catra lightly steps over her to get to the door. The last thing she wanted was for Adora to wake up. 
As soon as she’s out, she runs out to the elevator and bangs frantically on the buttons until it sends her to the bottom floor. The lift opens with a ding and in her haste she almost crashes headfirst into Glimmer. 
‘Oh hey! Are you going to work?’ Glimmer greets. She was in her silk pajamas and slippers, holding a glass of orange juice. 
‘Uh. Yeah.’ Catra lies, trying her best to look natural. 
‘Some party last night huh? Lucky today is a Saturday.’ Glimmer says conversationally, unaware of Catra’s urge to throw her across the room. ‘Hey, what happened to your cheek?’
Catra clutches her face, it still strung from where Adora struck her. ‘Nothing.’
Glimmer raises an eyebrow. ‘Well anyway, did you wanna stick around for  breakfast? The cooks made pancakes, bacon, eggs, the whole deal.' She peeks behind Catra. 'Is Adora still not up yet?’ 
As much as Catra wanted to scream get out of my way she schools her expression to her best customer service smile. ‘Nope she’s still sleeping it off. Anyway I’m gonna be late so I can’t stick around.’
‘Did you need a lift?’ Glimmer asks. It dawns on the brunette she couldn’t exactly run the entire way back home. ‘I’ll ask one of the drivers to take you back so you make it to your shift.’
Catra thanks her lucky stars that Glimmer was still too hungover to drive her. She wouldn’t have been able to dodge her questions if she had. 
‘Yes please.’ Catra says, giddy with relief. ‘Thank you.’ 
‘Ooh and before I forget, Adora told me last night to give you this.’ Glimmer says, grabbing the green bag of groceries off the counter. The shorter girl bundles it into Catra’s arms before she can object. 
‘Get home safe.’ She says, waving as the attendant leads her out the door. 
Catra looks down at the cans of food in her arms and doesn’t say anything.  
------
The days leading up to graduation were painful, to say the least. 
They more or less pretend the kiss didn't happen. Adora never brings it up, and neither does Catra. 
She would stare at the ceiling, wishing she had never gotten piss drunk at her birthday and kissed her. Adora was right, she did regret it. It was awful, the look on Adora's face when she slapped Catra replays in her mind and nightmares over and over again. It was mortifying. 
Adora still messages her every 3 days, and Catra still replies, though her words are empty and devoid of banter. I'm worried about you, she says. I'm fine, Catra always responds. 
The brunette continues to humour her to keep the peace, only shutting down when her old job was mentioned. Catra doesn’t allow Adora back into her home again. 
Sometimes they study together, but she can't concentrate when Adora wears her glasses. Her heart hurts, so she cradles her cheek and tries not to remember. 
The hickey she had branded Adora's neck with had been covered with foundation until it faded away. None of her friends had teased her about it, so she clearly had not told a single soul what had happened. 
Catra bites at the scab on her lip from where Adora’s teeth nicked her until it bleeds. She wants to apologize, but the words stick on her tongue and she can't bring herself to talk about that night. 
Catra knew Adora was only here by her side to alleviate her guilt. Shame buries itself under her skin every time she's near her, like she was too embarrassed to even exist in the same space as Adora. She wants to disappear. 
Exams are hard, and without an internet connection after the library closes at 6pm made it difficult to study. She tries to use the Mcdonald's wifi but soon just ordering a water cup wasn't enough for the workers to let her stay. It was a fruitless effort anyway, in her heart she knew she wasn't going to come out on top. Her ranking had slipped, she wasn't even at second place anymore. Rent was due at the end of the month, and without her Burger King wage she knew she'll be kicked out sooner than later. 
Catra felt stressed and self destructive, and the only thing that kept her from falling off the edge completely was Scorpia. As much as she hated depending on others, she'd much rather her old coworker than Adora. 
Her classmates seemed to like this new, muted down version of Catra who didn't argue and just stayed quiet most of the time. Fighting back was too difficult when all she wanted to do was blend into the wallpaper. All they talked about was where they were going for vacation after graduation, and Catra certainly had nothing to contribute to that conversation.
She felt like crying, all the time. It was agony, wanting to burst out into tears randomly while she sat wasting away in the student council room. Despite herself, she missed Burger King, and she just kept getting ghosted or rejected in her other job applications. Sometimes when she really wanted to indulge herself, she'd go cry silently in the school toilet stall. 
Glimmer notices the change, and she catches her glaring. 'You don't seem as alive lately. Your eye bags are huge.' 
'S'fine.' Catra replies, hiding her hands so she doesn't see how they shake. Honestly Catra couldn't remember the last time she slept.
'Pfft, don't lie to me. Adora's worried about you. You're getting skinnier, and your eyes are always raw. All you do is stare into space.' 
Catra bites down on her nails. Of course she knew that. But she's gone through this before, and she'll do it again. 
'What happened between you two?’ 
‘None of your business.’ Catra replies, shuffling her way to the hall. 
--
Their graduation ceremony starts off uneventfully. Every student’s parents except Catra’s sit proudly in the audience, eager to watch their kid graduate. One by one they receive their certificate and return to their seats. 
Adora and Catra stand side by side onstage, as Adora makes their final speech as School Captain. Through the blinding lights, she sees Angella waving proudly at her adoptive daughter in the crowd. 
Catra looks at Adora in the corner of her eye. She must look pathetic, lovesick and pining after someone she couldn’t have. 
‘It’s been such an honour serving the entire faculty and students of this school. I couldn’t have done it without my amazing Vice-Captain and all of my prefects.
Now I’m proud to hand over my badge to the next School Captain, Frosta.’ 
They go through the rest of the ceremony like that, each member of the student council handing their badges to their successors. 
Soon their Principal comes up to the podium, tapping it once and clearing her throat. 
‘Announcing our honor student, and the winner of the scholarship to Eternia University…’ Castaspella says, turning over the sign card. 
‘None other than our school captain, Adora!’
Everyone starts clapping, and Adora walks across the stage to shake Castaspella's hand. 
Sounded about right. Catra never won against Adora in her entire life. She had already expected this outcome. Like a game of cat and mouse, going over and over for all eternity. 
Adora would excel with her elite education and secure a well paying job. Catra would struggle at the bottom indefinitely, never amounting to anything. She never would, if Adora was still there next to her. When the blonde re-entered her life, everything she had been working towards for years just collapsed. Her job, her home, her School Captain status, her chance at the scholarship, her sanity. 
She had to be wiped clean. A fresh start. 
The flower petals were falling, the streets decorated with a vibrant pink. The other students mill out of the crowd with their parents, chatting excitedly about what was next in their futures. She waits for Adora underneath a tree.  
'Congratulations.' Catra says, when she finally spots the other girl in the crowd. Adora pulls away from Angella’s embrace to meet her. 
'You deserve this so much more than I do.' Adora says, her voice pained like she didn't just win a full ride to her dream university. 'You should take it.'
'It's in your name, silly.' Catra replies, lightly tapping her with her rolled up certificate.
'Besides, I knew you'd get into Eternia, so I never applied.'
Adora blinks dumbly. '...What? Aren’t we going to the same university?’ 
She always was a bit slow on the uptake. ‘Only you decided that, stuupid. Say, it's about time we ended this right?' 
‘Catra, what are you...' 
'Our deal. You don't need to feel guilty anymore or bring me anything.' Catra says, her voice sounding like it didn't belong to her. She rummages in her bag, bringing out Adora's spare varsity jacket that she hadn’t returned. 'Here, take this. Thank you for all the help.' 
'What do you mean? You want to stop being friends?' Adora says in disbelief, taking the jacket.  
Catra nods. ‘I can’t continue with the arrangement. I hope you understand.’ 
‘I don’t! Was I the only one who thought we were friends, real ones?’ Adora asks.
‘...That’s right. I never saw you as a friend. You were just a meal ticket to me. Are you happy now?’ Catra snaps back. Shit, that wasn’t what she meant to say. She had planned to end this quickly and painlessly, on a high note. Trust Adora to put up a fight. 
Something seems to click in Adora’s brain. ‘Is this about the night of the party?’
‘Figure that out yourself.’ Catra replies, turning to walk away. 
Adora grabs onto her arm. ‘Wait! If- if that’s what you want, I’ll give it! Just don't go!' 
This dumb blonde really was offering up her body, out of what? A sense of duty? How stupid. 
‘Is that right?’ Catra says, walking closer to her. Adora backs up until she is pinned to the tree. They’re face to face now. 
‘Can you really do this?’ Catra lifts Adora’s chin by a finger. 
Finally it seems to dawn on Adora exactly what Catra wanted. She swallows, biting her lip. 
There’s a flicker of hesitation, before Adora’s eyes squeeze shut defiantly. The blonde is shaking like a leaf, her breath coming out in panicked stutters from her pursed lips. 
Catra just stares at Adora’s scrunched up face impassively. Her scared reaction was the only confirmation she needed for closure. 
She flicks the other girl’s forehead, and her big blue eyes open in confusion.
‘Chill out, I’m not that evil to do it to someone so unwilling.’
Adora blinks, clutching her forehead. ‘Catra?’
Suddenly Angella’s voice cuts through their conversation from the car park. ‘Adora dear, are you done chatting with your friend? We have reservations!'
‘Um, I…’ Her old school captain opens her mouth to say something, but Angella's started to lose her patience. 'Adora, how long are you going to stand there? Glimmer is already waiting for us at the restaurant!' 
Catra just smiles tiredly. ‘Take care, dummy.’ 
She watches Adora being dragged off unwillingly by her adoptive mother to the car. 
Catra lets out a sigh. Her phone pings with a message from Scorpia, and she knows it's time to go. 
---
By the time Angella releases her from their graduation celebration, Adora can feel that it's already too late.
Adora: 
Please, can we talk? Let me fix this
A pop up appears over the screen. 
Message Not Sent
This person isn't receiving messages at this time. 
Adora sends another message, but they all go undelivered. Catra had blocked her again. Panic spikes through her veins, and she quickly dons on a jacket and grabs her car keys. 
She sneaks out that night, down the familiar winding path through the bush that led to Catra's place. 
'Catra?' She rolls up the garage door, blinking in the darkness. When her eyes adjusted, she found Catra's old home completely emptied. 
All the furniture and items her friend had collected over the years, they were all gone. The little stove where they cooked, the old mattress where they talked late into the night, all vanished like they were never there. 
A single green plastic bag remained on the floor untouched, filled to the brim of food. 
123 notes · View notes
mcwriting · 5 years ago
Text
Starstruck (7)
I’m back again and so quickly! Ha! I’m getting soooo close to finishing this but now I’m distracted writing my other series lol. 
While writing this I thought a lot about how much Tom actually curses vs. how little I put in andddd it’s pretty disproportional. I mostly just don’t speak like that so it carries over into my writing, but whatever. I’ll stick with it.
Anyways pls enjoy
Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6 Chapter 7 Chapter 8 Chapter 9
Fandom: Tom Holland
Ship: Tom x reader
Setting: Mostly LA, a little bit of South Korea in this one, but it doesn’t really talk about it
Word Count: 2146
Warnings: Mild language as per usual
Rating: K+
                            __________________________________
You tore apart your room looking for your favorite swimsuit, an olive green bikini top that accentuated your chest and a pair of black high cut bottoms that lengthened your legs nicely. 
It had been a few days since you went and stayed with b/f/n and she now wanted to go to the beach with you. You hadn’t gone out much since due to the paparazzi, who still hung around your house sometimes.
The suit was nowhere to be found, every drawer and cabinet searched high and low. 
And then you spotted something in the corner of your eye.
A beach bag slumped over the chair by your desk.
Could it be? 
No
Unless…?
You stepped carefully towards it, dreading opening up the bag and the subsequent memories attached to it. The hurt of what Tom did was still fresh, but better than before.
Neither of you had had contact since his final message to you, which was something you weren’t sure if you were happy, sad, or mad about. 
You’d thought about what Caroline had said in the past few nights, losing sleep over her words.
There’s no way I’ve caught feelings for the guy, right?
I mean, sure. He’s handsome, nice accent, great muscles, smells good, dancer, good sense of humor. The list could go on, I guess. 
Oh wait. Shit. 
Those thoughts flooded your mind as you dumped the contents of the bag onto the carpet, something landing with a heavy thud underneath the swimsuit you’d been searching for.
You peeled away the clothes and things to find a yellow glass bottle, Tom’s stupid unopened cologne now rested on the floor of your room. You stared at it for a few seconds, not knowing what to think.
You’d pretty much forgotten about it since the incident, pushed far from every other thought you’d had since that day.
A buzz suddenly sounded from your phone on the bed, revealing a text from b/f/n saying she was on her way. 
Not wanting to run late, you sat the bottle on the desk and ran to the bathroom to change before she arrived.
                             __________________________________
Photographers followed you and b/f/n at the beach, probably wanting to write a gossip piece about how you were “moving on.” Neither of you cared.
Instead, you both actively posed for the cameras for a little bit, laughing at the men’s persistence. Eventually, however, another of many celebrities in the area caught their eyes and they left, giving you much needed peace.
After a couple hours spent swimming, taking selfies, and tanning, the two of you gathered your things and headed for lunch at a nearby cafe. 
As you sat and ate under an umbrella, you found an article that had already been written containing photos from the beach earlier. It was titled “Moving on? Y/l/n spotted in spicy bikini with pal,” something that made you roll your eyes. 
“Wouldn’t it be funny if we reposted some of these pictures?” you joked to b/f/n. 
“Yes oh my gosh! That would be hilarious! Send me the article,” she agreed. 
You both screenshotted some pictures, picking your favorite to be the cover of your next Instagram post and intermixing some of the day’s selfies, too. Each of you hit post, tagging one another, and went back to your food.
                             __________________________________
The day had been long but perfect. 
B/f/n dropped you at your house late that afternoon, both of you tired from sitting in the sun most of the day. Since then, you’d spent the evening with your family and now prepared for bed.
You hadn’t checked your phone much since posting the photos, but you opened instagram to find that tons of Tom’s fangirls had liked and commented on your picture, most of them pretty supportive. 
Your caption had read “Apparently this is a spicy swimsuit and somehow it’s helping me move on from drama. Either way, today was a much needed beach day with my fav!” 
Other of your friends commented inside jokes, adding fire and pepper emojis, and called you spicy.
You spent a few minutes replying to comments when you decided to look at the likes. You searched “Holland” in the bar, wanting to see how many fans were liking it, but the first name caused your stomach to drop. 
Tomholland2013
There was a blue checkmark signifying it was him, too. 
There was no way he’d done it earlier, so you went back to the comments, where you found a new comment from only a minute before that read “OMG TOM LIKED!”
You were shocked to say the least. Was this some kind of a joke to him? Or was this his way of reaching out from a distance? Your thoughts became frequent and jumbled, and finally you decided to put up the phone and truly get ready for bed.
On the back of your desk chair was draped your favorite sleep shirt. As you went to grab it, the cologne bottle caught your eye once again.
You stared at it for a minute, then did something you’d probably regret later. 
You ripped off the plastic wrap off top and uncapped it. You took a heavy breath, and then spritzed the scent a few times over the sheets. 
It wafted up around you, filling your nose with the musky sweetness you were familiar with. 
After changing, you crawled into bed, the smell overcoming you, relaxing you. Surprisingly, butterflies filled your stomach as warm memories of yours and Tom’s night together came to mind once again. 
Ah shit. Caroline was right was the last thought to cross your mind as sleep overtook you.
                             __________________________________
Stan Twitter and Insta had blown up overnight as Tom’s fans speculated about him liking your post (and of course it just had to be one in a swimsuit). You tried not to think about it too much as you once again went to dance and tried to let off steam.
After class came and went, a parent came to let you know that once again there were dozens of people outside waiting for you with cameras and whatnot.
Your friends offered to help walk you to the car, but you were honestly angry. Enough was enough.
“I knew things would get crazy but this has gone on for too long. Celebrities might have to put up with this, but I don’t,” you spat, shouldering your dance bag and heading for the door. 
A few people tried to stop you but you just shrugged them off.
“Y/n, y/n!” the people began yelling, fighting to see who would get to your first. One woman beat out the rest and shoved a microphone in your face, the cameraman blocking your way.
“Tell us about your time with Tom Holland! We only want the truth!” she exclaimed with her feigned enthusiasm.
”You don’t want the truth, you want a story,” you began. Seeing the way people already looked uncomfortable with that statement, you continued.
“You take a good, normal person and turn him into your own little reality show. You build him up into a big celebrity just so you can tear him down in public.”
You were beginning to feel your face heat up and eyes threaten tears, but still you continued, looking out at the rest of the crowd.
“Just so you can sell magazines and TV shows? That’s really sick. And Tom Holland’s just one example. He’s talented and successful. He’s all the stuff lots of kids dream of having.”
Nothing you said had a hint of sarcasm or disdain, but rather it was a defendant tone. Now you took on an accusatory one directed at the reporters.
“But thanks to you, he’s had to give up some of the best things in life. Freedom. Privacy. Honesty. So congratulations, you’ve created a celebrity. But you have wrecked the human being inside. You should be ashamed of yourselves.”
You finished the tirade, a tear slipping onto your cheek as you remembered the night he spent at your house telling you about how he often missed normal life. There was a heavy pause but cameras continued to flash. The reporter turned to her cameraman.
“Did you get that?” she asked. He nodded, so she turned back to you.
“Y/n, y/n just one more question. In your opinion, who is Tom Holland really?”
You looked at her, taken aback. Your blood boiled.
“Who is he? I don’t know. The Tom Holland you’re all so obsessed with…” you took a moment to collect your thoughts. “I promise you I never met him. And I wouldn’t want to.”
With that, you pushed through the crowd and to your car, hoping they were satisfied.
                             __________________________________
On the other side of the world, Tom was becoming stir crazy. By the time Tom had awoken, videos and transcripts of your speech were already circulating the internet and he was overwhelmed and frankly angry. 
He was supposed to be getting ready for another press day, but how could he do interviews when everyone would just want to hound on him about you?
“Tom, we need to talk,” Harrison said sternly as Tom paced his hotel living room. Harry and Sam stood behind him in the entryway..
“Alright what on?” he asked as though nothing was wrong.
“Tom. Tell us what’s got you acting like this, saying what you did, and her making that speech through tears. You obviously liked that girl and something happened with her,” Harry stated.
Tom paused and turned to the group.
“What are you talking about? There was nothing going on between us.”
They all looked at each other and then Tom like he was an idiot.
“Look mate, you have no reason to lie to us. We always have your back and we’ll probably understand,” Sam added. The group took a few steps forward.
Tom was becoming more agitated and avoided eye contact with all of them. He crossed his arms tightly over his chest.
“First off, I’m not lying. And secondly, if I were, you all wouldn’t understand anyways because you aren’t me! None of you get what it’s like living my life and you never will!” Tom exclaimed, running his fingers through his hair in frustration.
The group was taken aback at Tom’s explosive statement and now Harrison was mad too.
“You know what, man? We came here to talk because we care about you. You’ve been a real dick the past few days and it’s getting old. All we wanted to do was help you out but instead you decided to go all movie star on us,” Harrison blurted. He turned to the twins, “Let’s go guys. He’s obviously beyond us.”
The three boys turned to walk out the door and Tom felt a weight drop in his stomach. Harry was just starting to open the door when Tom stopped them.
“Wait!” he paused and took a deep breath, “I’ll tell you all what’s really going on, but you have to let me tell the whole story first.”
They reluctantly turned back, eventually making themselves comfortable around the living room and letting Tom vent out the whole story, including how his management had made him cut ties with you.
“She was so honest and kind and I blew it. The more distant from her I can make myself, the better. I couldn’t let myself bring you in on this secret and feel bad too. She deserves to just hate me.”
The boys were all shocked and angered at what was going on.
“Tom, I love you, you’re my brother. But you are such a div! And I mean that in the most extreme manner possible,” said Harry.
“Yeah, come on mate. Just fire them! Why are you letting them control your life?” asked Sam. 
“You guys don’t get it! Singleness sells! I can’t jeopardize my career just because I found y/n to be the most beautiful and incredible and real person I’ve ever met. I mean, right?”
Harrison piped up at that.
“You really are more stupid than you look. Tom I’m gonna tell you straight. They’re living in some figmented reality where your relationship status determines whether or not you get hired. I mean, you’re Spider-Man for God’s sake. That has to count for something, right?”
Tom bounced his head back and forth in contemplation. 
“I mean I guess-” he started when Harrison cut him off again.
“You guess!” he stood up in disbelief. “You guess? Come on! Directors don’t care who the hell you’re dating if you’re giving them Oscar worthy performances and box office hits! And even then, who cares about your career when you’re putting your heart on the cutting board for it. Just go after the damn girl, Tom. And fire those assholes while you’re at it.”
                            __________________________________
A/N: Still can’t believe I got this out so quickly. Anyways, thanks for reading and as always, send me a message or ask if you wanna talk since I can’t respond to comments! (And keep an eye out for “the best revenge,” my new series)
TAG LIST: @marvel-lously, @jackiehollanderr, @one-big-fangirl, @dreamyvans, @lisannehus, @honeymoonpeter, @shootingstarsaretearsofheaven, @chenellearose, @photoshopart15, @parkeret, @ilikealotofpeople-younotsomuch, @racewife2004 
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shirtlesssammy · 5 years ago
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15x10: The Heroes’ Journey
Then:
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Heroes
Now:
Monster Fight Club! RAWR. In one corner we have wolf-man and in the other, we have wraith-woman. I felt like I was watching a Sci-fi channel show or another show on the CW with this opening scene. I have to give it up to the music and cinema of the sequence though. It’s quite lovely, even as the wolf-man gets stabbed to (near) death.
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Meanwhile, in tiny Lebanon, Kansas, Dean’s picking up essentials (plus pie magazines) at his local Kwik Trip. 
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I have many things to say about this. First, who knew Lebanon had such tall buildings in it? And I’ve read many a comment about Bobo getting his name on something, and while YES, that’s technically true, this Kwik Trip (a real regional chain of gas stations/convenience stores in Wisconsin) is also named after the comedian behind The Manitowoc Minute, Charlie Berens. The Open sign missing the ‘n’ is a reference to it as well. Bless Jerry Wanek and his love for his home state. Anyway, Dean’s credit card is declined, his fight or flight instinct kicks in when faced with the store attendant's psoriasis, he gets a toothache, AND he gets a parking ticket. 
Sam Fucking I Don’t Need Hotpads Winchester royally messes up dinner by burning the food, dropping the pasta all over the food, and breaking all the plates. 
The weirdness continues once Dean gets home. Sam trips when running to greet him and he’s getting a cold.
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Dean gets a call from Garth who needs some help. On the road, they discuss their Very Bad Day. Dean thinks they’re cursed. Sam’s too busy sneezing to contribute. I’m surprised Dean didn’t make him sit in the backseat. (Did Dean seem sarcastically unhappy about Cas seeking out angel help? #missinghusbandhour). Then the ultimate travesty happens: Baby breaks down. 
They have to walk the last ten miles to Garth’s. When they make it, he welcomes them with open arms (Sam declines the hug but Dean gets one and a compliment -- “You smell so good.”)
Garth was previously feeding his twin baby boys, and he takes them to meet his children. He has a daughter, Gertie, and twin boys, Sam (named after Sam) and...Castiel. Dean is confused and disappointed. I love how there’s no explanation as to why Dean didn’t get a namesake. Natasha wrote a thing though. 
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Garth then takes them to see why he called. Bess’s cousin is unconscious on Gertie’s bed. He has wraith cuts all over his body. 
Dean, the candy eating monster that he is, nabs some candy beans from Gertie’s dresser and Garth notices his pained reaction to eating them. Dean makes note of how nice Garth’s home and life are. (SOFT) Sam sneezes again and Bess tells him she has something to help. 
Beth hands Sam her family concoction for helping the common cold. Sam downs it in one go --and instantly has regrets. It’s mostly cayenne pepper. Wherps. Sidenote: Gertie’s little wolf stuffy. All the hearts! 
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Poor Sam really goes through something --and it is a sight to see. Little Sam and Little Cas are sympathy crying with him and he tries to reassure them that “Big Sam’s okay.” He’s really not. 
Garth asks about Dean’s teeth and Dean confesses they’ve hurt since the previous day.
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Garth takes Dean to his basement dentist office. It seems he finished getting his dental degree and is now a dentist for other werewolves. “Fang maintenance is a B.” He assesses Dean’s mouth and finds 17 cavities! 
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He rolls out the nitrous oxide and gets to work. We get to stay with Dean though, AND GOOD FUCKING CHUCK ON A CRACKER. 
I can’t explain what I witnessed with my own two eyes. I really, really can’t. @neven-ebrez​ had a great thread on Twitter that I fully love. 
In any event, Dean tap dances to Cole Porter’s Let’s Misbehave. Garth starts showing him the ropes, but then he takes over on his own and starts dancing with a light stick LAMP. He blows a kiss at the lamp and ascends a stairway to heaven the top of the map table and finishes his dance. They dedicated almost 2 minutes to this scene. I --I just. can’t. Also, Dean going for the lamp is timed to line up with the “lovebirds” lyric? I’m so very tired. 
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Anyway, Dean comes to with a mouth full of gauze, and presumably no cavities. 
Everyone reconvenes in the Fitzgerald’s living room. Garth wants to know what’s happening. Sam tells him that they’re kind of on the outs with God. Garth realizes that they’ve been the heroes of Chuck’s stories, and wonders, “what’s that make me? A supporting character? A special guest star?” Garth's happy being the guest star. Being the hero is the worst. Their lives are going to suck until the end. Also, little vanilla couple Garth and Bess apparently love 50 Shades. Lol. Garth points out that the hero never sweats the small stuff because that stuff ruins the story. They’re normal now. (Dean suggests cursed, which, like, lol bud, normal people's lives just suck.) 
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Bess’s cousin calls for her and they all rush to his side. He doesn’t want to talk to hunters. Sam turns on the ol’ puppy dog eyes and….it does nothing. In fact, Brad can hardly believe that that shtick works at all. Ooof. Bummer, Sammy. Bess digs into the wraith wound to get some answers. And ugh. That was squishy grossness. Brad starts talking about the monster fights though. He tells them where to find the place. 
The Winchesters bid Garth farewell. Garth is VERY WORRIED about them. “The old Sam and Dean” could handle a whole warehouse of monsters but the Supernormally Normal boys don’t stand a chance. Dean’s resolute. Fighting monsters, righting wrongs? That’s just who they are. Dean implores Garth to stay home with his wife and kids, and the Winchesters head off. 
They arrive at midday outside the arena. Dean polishes off his SEVENTH grilled cheese sandwich and they gather weaponry to storm the place. Sam’s concerned that Garth’s theory that the Winchesters are normal is correct, and they need to take precautions. They gather extra ammo, dead man’s blood, and Dean pulls out his beloved precious weapon.
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Upon entering, Sam immediately trips noisily over a bucket and Dean’s grilled cheese extravaganza decides to throw a party right back into his mouth. Dean races for a bathroom, leaving Sam to peruse the room holding the main fight cage. 
While Dean is throwing up in the toilet, I desperately try to pretend this isn’t happening. I’m FINE with entrails but upchuck is a hard no, apparently. The bathroom stall opens and one of the monsters from the cold open’s fight night stands there, training Dean’s grenade launcher on him.
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Sam and Dean end up locked in the cage-match cage (not to be confused with the CAGE cage). The monster, Cutty, owns the fight club. “Man? Monster? They’re at their best, their most pure, in the heat of competition.” Pardon me while I fake cough “Purgatory” for twenty-five minutes. 
Cutty introduces them to their new friend, Maul, a huge monster who grimaces gloomily and flexes his muscles. He wants the Winchesters to fight Maul (together) in the cage match that evening. 
Dean tries to tell a story to get out of the situation and I HAVE NEVER BEEN PROUDER. He draws on their legends - the mighty creatures they’ve taken down - and questions whether any MERE monster should even think about trying to attack them. Nobody’s buying what he’s selling. 
A short commercial for the upcoming cage match plays. It’s….
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AMAZING
All the monsters are gathered around, ready to watch the two mighty cage matches. KILLER WRAITH versus JAMAICA DJINN and MIGHTY MAUL versus THE WINCHESTERS!!!
It’s battle royale time, motherfuckers. When the first fight begins, Dean and Sam are locked up in cells just outside of the ring. “Just how I wanted to die,” Dean grouses. “With a freakin’ audience.” We shall not speak of the 200+ times we have witnessed Dean die on this show. 
Dean pulls a nail from the ceiling and proceeds to try to pick the lock. He…fails. Miserably. Sam gives it a try on his lock and neither of them can pick it. 
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“Could we ever actually pick locks?” Sam asks, frustrated. I’m with others in guessing that both their natural and learned skills have been hugely demoted through Chuck’s interference and this downturn won’t last. But this is a great way to make them doubt themselves. This is the black moment in the hero’s journey - at least for this episode. They’ve never doubted themselves more! Dean delivers a stirring speech anyway. “We’re the best in the world. I say we go out there. We kick some ass.”
Cutty returns to fetch the Winchesters. “Shirts off,” he demands on the way. EYEBALLS EMOJI. But Sam and Dean are gone, the cage doors wide open! The episode rewinds, this time with another point of view. Who’s that lanky man in the floppy-eared hat walking through the crowd? It’s everyone’s favorite werewolf hero, that’s who. Garth frees them by just…BUSTING off the lock.
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Outside, Sam and Dean are ready to flee. But Garth has other plans. He whips out a detonator and we get a quick clip show of Garth planting C4 around the club. The club is DECIMATED by fire. Maul survives, however, and strides out of the burning building. Garth goes up against him, but Maul knocks him out. Sam and Dean stand and face Maul, despite their low, low expectations of themselves. Like real damn heroes!
What follows is a HIGHLY comical fight. Sam and Dean do their absolute, precious best, but fortunately the fight seems to be operating on some modified Looney Toons rules. 
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Garth saves them with a machete through Maul’s head. “You got Garthed!”
Back at Garth’s home, Dean and Sam cradle the babies. “This Cas keeps looking at me weird,” Dean notes. “So kinda like the real Cas,” Sam says. OH SAM. OH SHOW. How we are blessed!
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They head out, Dean clutching a bag of grilled cheese sandwiches from Bess. Sam and Dean thank Garth for saving them and call him a hero. Excuse me while I CRY FOR FIVE MINUTES this is so soft. “I guess I learned from the best,” Garth returns. Garth gives them a tip - a place in Alaska where you can go when your luck’s run bad. “There’s always a catch,” Garth warns. 
They hug!
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“You don’t smell so bad yourself,” Dean notes when he hugs Garth. “It’s Hai Karate,” Garth says. Guys. I love them. 
Werewolves of London plays us out. Garth and Bess dance together through the window as the Winchesters get into the Impala. It’s. So. Precious. And. Warm. 
“I always thought I could be a good dancer if I wanted to be,” Dean muses. Sam admits that Dean’s good at the Macarena. Ah, yes. My generation!
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Dean and Sam reflect on their situation. Their lives are far from normal, so being “normal” is dangerous by its very nature. They need as many advantages as possible, so it’s time for a road trip to Alaska!
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The music mounts dramatically! Triumphantly! It’s time to ride into the sunset!
Baby sputters out. “Son of a bitch!” Dean shouts as the screen fades to black.
Natasha: I can tell you IMMEDIATELY and WITHOUT RESERVATION that this episode is going to be on my short list of comfort rewatches for all eternity. <3
Werewolves of Quotedom:
Seriously?
Still a hugger, huh?
You smell so good!
You’re very strong
Fang maintenance is a B
Mommy, the giant’s crying!
I wanna be the guest star. Being the hero sucks.
You need a colonoscopy STAT
Just because God yanked the magic horseshoe out of our ass, doesn’t mean we’re gonna give up
I’m a growing boy!
I think you might be lactose intolerant now
You keep all your friends in a cage?
You know them. You don’t like them. The WINCHESTERS
You are SO STRONG
C4, a hunter’s best friend
Want to read more? Check out our Recap Archive! 
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sarahmaybank · 4 years ago
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tagged by @nataliamaximoff thank uu bbb❤️
do you prefer writing with black pen or a blue pen? black
would you prefer to live in the country or in the city? city
if you could learn a new skill, what would it be? graphic design, skateboarding, embroidery
do you drink your tea/coffee with sugar? nuh
what was your favorite book as a child? i didnt have one? magic treehouse maybe? calvin&hobbes comics too. 13rw helped me cope tho we dont speak of the author🙄
do you prefer baths or showers? showers, baths make me feel closed in
if you could be a mythical creature, which one would you be? maybe a phoenix bc fire or a mermaid so i can swim lmao
paper or electronic books? paper but electronic is easier to read for me
what is your favorite items of clothing? my goonies tee
do you like your name? would you like to change it? yeah and no bc my sis named me (lee is a nickname)
who is a mentor to you? my vocal coach!!!! dunno where i’d be without him
would you like to be famous? if so, what for? i sing bc passion not fame
are you a restless sleeper? ugh yeah
do you consider yourself to be a romantic person? uhh idk i dont think so. im soft and physically affectionate tho
which element best describes you? earth
who do you want to be closer to? my sis. wish i had friends who i could jam with
do you miss anyone at the moment? my sis
tell us about an early childhood memory. NOPE i blocked most of it out. like how early is early childhood?? i dont remember much. OH ok i was 8yrs old when we bought my dog bella from a shelter. she was the only girl and adorable af (���:
what is the strangest thing you’ve eaten? raw fish eggs that my uncle tricked us into eating. eveR SINCE, i’ve always hated fish eggs😂
do you like spicy foods? yees
have you ever met someone famous? nuh. i was like a few feet away from selena gomez once bc a friend i used to have begged me to go see her at muchmusic lmao
do you keep a diary or journal? ye. a success journal, bullet journal and one for songwriting
do you prefer to use pen or pencil? pen
what is your star sign? ....taurus?
do you like your cereal crunchy or soggy? crunchy
what would you want your legacy to be? i just wanna make music. i dont even know of the things i can dream of, you know? theres so much out there. nd this is a super loaded q lol
do you like reading? what was the last book you read? yeah i just dont have enough energy to read continuously. im tryna get thru cursed by thomas wheeler
how do you show someone you love them? i hug them or tell them
do you like ice in your drinks? in my coffee yes
what are you afraid of? losing myself again, not doing what i love for the rest of my life
what is your favorite scent? lavender, bonfire smoke
do you address older people by their name or surname? name
if money was not a factor, how would you live your life? traveling and experiencing everything i can
do you prefer swimming in pools or the ocean? neither bc i cant swim
what would you do if you found $50 on the ground? these days? probably pick it up.
have you ever seen a shooting star? did you make a wish? yes and no
what is one thing you would want to teach your children? accountability and respect for yourself n everyone 
if you had to have a tattoo, what would it be and where would you get it? these are tattoos im planning on getting lol - half sleeve peonies on my forearm, ‘nothing happens’ on my thigh, and probably more i havent thought of yet
what can you hear now? the air conditioning n my mom cleaning her closet
where do you feel the safest? in my bed + sitting on rocks by the water, + on stage, + matt’s studio room
what is one thing you want to overcome/conquer? lack of motivation, lack of energy, depression + anxiety 
if you could travel back to an era, what would it be? 80s maybe, oor ancient egypt or rome or greece oR the dinosaur era lbr
what is your most used emoji? 💗
describe yourself using one word? persistent
what do you regret the most? not being able to start sooner. but it’s not my fault n there’s always time
last movie you saw? the backup plan. jlo movies hit different lol
last tv show you watched? big time ruuuush
invent a word and it’s meaning. no ty im tired
tagging: @jjbanks @veron-argentum @newthomally @enchantingqueenkitten + anyone else who wants to do this❤️
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