#yes i am now drawing inspiration from my own old posts
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animation for THE NEON VOIDD BABYYYY
this post is for @sugarpasteltmnt
‼️‼️MEGA YAPPING AHEAD PLEASE BEWARE‼️‼️
this might end up being really long and rambly and sappy but maybe not who knows.( it was) (and also featuring numerous spelling errors i am way too tired to fix and i am not re reading what i just wrote) SO. yknow how when chap idek..25(?) came out and i was all like “yeah so i made this animation for TNV and ill drop it when the fic ends” in your ask box? so. I FINISHED IT RAHHH. technically it has been finished since i sent that ask but ohhh my goodness did it need polishing. i haven’t animated in 4 years before that and omg it felt so good getting back into it but IDFK SOMETHING IS STILL NOT UP TO MY STANDARDS. i feel like i could have done so much more with it and i deffo wanted to but as soon as i told myself “oh yeah this is basically done” art block literally sucker punched me in the gut out of NOWHERE. I COULD NOT PICK UP MY I PAD. I COULD NOT DRAW. I WOULD STARE AT THE WIP ANIMATION AND BE UPSET BC I DDINT WANNA WORK ON IT AHH. that goes with saying. i kept having this thought in the back of my head “you need to finish it. you have a wip sitting. finish it. go do it. what are you doing are you STARTING ANOTHER PROJECT??? anddd yeah i got super distracted with other stuff and other projects and then i started spending my free time rewatching 2012 turtles and omg this summer has been a mess. i have all the free time in the world and i choose to be the least productive as possible with it even though i have a job that lets me literally sit on my phone and do whatever i want if no one is there. (i’ve brought my switch to work numerous times ☠️) what i was trying to get at is the fact that TNV has inspired a lot of the old me to come back and i lowk missed her. i really missed the point in all those words up there but im here now so whatever. BUT. TNV made me make a tumblr account, i got back in to animation AND digital art in general, got back into longfics that are ongoing, AND it also helped kickstart ideas for writing. i’ve got so many stories now!! you are such an inspirational person pastels i just- every time i read a new chapter of yours it made me wanna go get up and do something. i wanted to create something. because at the end of each chapter, i would think- “woah. a person out there just wrote this. they just sat down one day and committed. i wanna do that” so i did that. just huge thank you and shoutout to you pastel. like damn. idk no words from me here. just a bunch of platonic hugs and kisses and thankyouthankyouthsnkuou for this lovely heart wrenching but also sweet story. i love this fandom (tmnt) so SO much and i think it’s so awesome how interactive you are with your own personal NV fans. crazy how we’re all here because of a bunch of turtles.
STUFF ABOUT THE ANIMATION:
okay i really like to talk and if you let me, i will run my mouth. this is the internet so im gonna do just that. so more words for you to read 😁. AHEM. so like i stated before in the genuinely scary mess of words up there, i haven’t touched animation in a while, like, 4 years a while. yes i’ve done digital art here and there along the years, i haven’t been doing it nearly as much as i need to to use some programs to their full potential. layers are still confusing, and don’t even get me started on multiply and all that jazz. shading never comes out right on digital for me, i gotta work that one out. so, for this animation, i decided to go with a very rough style. nothing needed to be perfect, i just wanted to live my little life of trying to experiment with a bunch of different things all at once in one short animatic. I wanted to do that little ball bounce thing all animation artists start with (i kinda included that with the key). i also wanted to have a go at lip sync (no hate it was my first time) and also timing the animation with the music. i wanted to see how smoothly i could move a figure in and out of and out of the screen as well, which honestly, i think that part might be my favorite. i think i did a good job, and thats what matters. the animation itself lost a bunch of quality on importing it- no clue how it happened but now the ending is grainy af. ignore that pls lol- but it was sitting in my flipaclip for god, i dont even know, 3 months now? i kept going back and forth on if i wanted to share it or not, so im throwing it to the wolves and i guess whatrver happrns happens and im good with that. yay. im actually rrwlly tired now sooo *leaves this absolute pile of words with a video attached at your feet and stumbles away quickly*
also i’ve genuinely never posted anything so i’m learning how to use tumblr too ☠️
#rottmnt leo#rottmnt fanfiction#the neon void#neon void#rottmnt#animation#literally sos what are tags#is this like ao3 or something brother what do i do#PLEASR HELP#rise leo#fanimation#little goober guy#digital art#??? idk
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AAAAAHHH!!! Mer au be upon ye
Been working on designs for my fanfic (that I'll probably be rewriting I don't like how I characterized them).... fish archie.
He's based on a Demanson's Cichlid :3 which are. really difficult to draw for some reason
More under the cut!!! Fish rambling and lore stuff. Plus fish maxie that I am currently too lazy to color or otherwise finish
Man I love mer aus. Uhm. FISH BEAM BLAST AUGHHH!!!
Archie is currently 37 years old in this au (unless I change it. LOL)
Him, along with Matt and Shelly (and maybe other members of team aqua in the rewrite. idk), live in the wreckage of a ship fairly deep underwater, choosing to stay as far away from humans as possible. In contrast to this, Maxie and his group take more inspiration from humans in their little settlement thingy, choosing to take scraps of metal and other things to build their home.
Most merfolk live in groups called pods, in the rework of the fanfic I'll elaborate more on this but. I'm lazy right now. Sorry.
Anyways Archie is generally more like??? adventurous and stuff, and him and the other members of his pod are like. really tight-knit. They're also generally more muscular than the members of Maxie's group, choosing to hunt fish & other prey using their own strength and speed, whereas the magmas use traps and stuff.
Also. Maxie has a collection of little human trinkets and stuff. Most of the space in his den/house thing is just like. trinkets. He also has a very unfriendly relationship with dolphins. I admittedly haven't done much with it in the original since it's... y'know... one chapter at the moment... but ill do more in the rewrite i prommy.
ANYWAYS!!!! Fish beam blast MAXIE
He's a common mudskipper. I love common mudskippers and just mudskippers in general really. Top tier fish.
He doesn't have glasses because. reasons involving the fact that he lives in the ocean.
However. I plan on giving him glasses eventually, he'll probably find a pair and think "Oh joy!! A new human invention I have not yet seen! Joyous day!!" and he decides to constantly wear them even though they make his vision like, ten times Worse.
Goodbye for now. I will inevitably post more Fish later. like when i finish the maxie design. LOL!!
(If you would like to read the fanfic even though it's like. ugly at the moment. It's "Sunlight on the Ocean's Like the Scars on Your Skin" on a03. Enjoy.)
#my art#oras maxie#oras archie#merpeople#mer au#Hardenshipping mer au#hardenshipping#pokemon oras#oras#pokemon#pokemon fanart#Soup's oras Mer Au#aqua leader archie#magma leader maxie#team aqua#team magma
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I don't know much about you as a person, but from what I can gather you've had a long journey with art, but still have the motivation to continue even when its rough. I'm sure you didn't start out making masterpieces, so if its not too much trouble, do you have any advice for a 16 year old artist losing motivation? i feel like im stagnating right now and its awful
Idk man, all I can say is, draw watchu want without the care who's gonna see it or what they gonna say , commit to new ideas and care less about pleasing everyone, because I know that way too well, I started learning by drawing animals, flowers and nature, "you should draw something else", switches to furries " No you must do human portraits", draws humans *no one fuckin cares*, and I felt miserable drawing what I didn't want all the damn time just trying to please everyone and be liked, hell, I still do that sometimes cuz I'm a dumbass. When in reality, when you do your own thing is when you're the happiest, this internet bullshit? Yeah don't trust the likes and favs, people like what they find relatable, no one really knows how much time you've spent on your drawing or how much you love it, when a 5 min doodle you did could do more than a painting that took 2 whole days to complete just to be scrapped in a new speedy record, paint what you love for yourself and you only.
Don't be shy to learn new things, I have tons of stuff I don't post here cuz I know people wouldn't care about it, but here for this post, have this that I practiced when I felt too depressed to think of anything good and wanted to step back from the MD artstyle
You'll see, you'll thrive when you draw what you want, and get yourself a drawing buddy! That way you'll stop focusing on the internet and more on each other, and each other's improvement. Tbh I struggled with that one. Since everyone I had were not into art irl, I somehow managed to find someone after 10 years of drawing alone. I honestly wanted more people to join in and make an improvement circle, but unfortunately that never happened.
I found myself twice as productive now than ever, even though I'm not active here as much I am still drawing and making things, ofc giving you more comics! And other fun things in the future I hope.
If you're struggling to draw something just do it, man commit, i was uncomfortable drawing men and male characters for years, I've wasted so many years being "too uncomfortable" and draw a naked person like yeesh who fucking cares, it's for studying.
And ofc if you feel like you're not improving at all please, please experiment with your artstyle and try something new, please refresh your mind, I was stuck for years doing the same thing over and over, same colors, same 2px brush, drawing like a machine same shit over and over, I felt so stuck and lost, but also afraid to do something new, idk why, I guess I never felt good enough or deserving of it. I also didn't go to art school, I am NOT a professional, nor will i ever be in my opinion. Hell, me feeling like I'll never be good enough left me afraid to try and apply for art school, they were asking for sculptures, different mediums all that scary stuff and I was like, I don't.. know.. how to do those things... I can't build a portfolio in less than 3 months?!?! I don't even know how to use half of what they're asking for!!
In reality at the end of the day, art is what you make of it and no one can stop you, search for inspirations and don't be afraid to try, yes you'll fail fist 2 or 10 or hell even 100 times, but you'll come back with more knowledge than ever.
For ending I give you the most confusing drawing to ever exist [dw he's just sleeping on top of her and she's just ghasping for air but awe romance or sum lol] is it weird? Yeah but I had a fun time making it hahaha
Idk I'm bad at putting my thoughts together, but hopefully some of this helps.
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I am posting Ghost and Soap prematurely, I wanted to add the others but I am not sure if I still will.
So here are some thoughts on these two in civvies. (Important to add, I would not go as far as to say these are headcanons but more of an exploration and me having some fun)
Yes as many others I don't think Ghost would wear his balaclava in public. Tbh the mask I gave him is already pushing it, BUT I think he is enough of a little freak (affectionate) to wear his balaclava when he is home alone.
As mentioned before the initial trigger for me to draw them like this were some people convincing me that actually Ghost, as someone who wears a cape and carries replacement skeleton gloves on the field, does care about fashion.
Problem being I don't really know things about fashion myself so we have to make due with my limited sense of style.
First things first I wanted him to not look like an edgelord who just left highschool as well as actively compromising his identity whilst still keeping some of his skeleton themes in his clothes. And since the spine is my favourite part of a skeleton he DIYed one onto the back of his, according to my references, expensive coat.
Second, because I think it is hilarious to give this 6'4 man another unnecessary 1.5 inches I put him in the most fashionable item I own: converse all star lugged 2.0 plattform shoes. (We are already bonding over wearing Salomons most of the time, we MUST have the same taste in shoes, 100%, definitely, thats how it works, he is just like me fr, yes yes)
Turtleneck for all the people out there who want him to be a slut, as well as to add a sense of maturity and last but not least,
Some pants.
(I originally wanted to give him cargo pants in memory of that one picture I saw of a dude making fucking CARGO PANTS LOOK FANCY AF, but here it looked really messy so I dropped that)
Overall it is vaguely inspired by techwear without going too hard that it sticks out.
So with Soap I don't think he actually discriminates between work and normal clothes much. The main difference being that now he wears all the band shirts he has (and surprisingly still fit) since he was 14. He still sticks to the same pants and shoes (as long as they are clean of course)
The jacket is inspired by a very old and beloved jacket of mine that I have lost and am still mourning.
Tbh to him I don't have too much to say since he is imo probably the closest to just-a-dudeTM when it comes to fashion.
And yes even considering his hairstyle (this is coming from the perspective of someone who has different iterations of mohawks since he is 15), I do think he had a strong alternative/punk phase as a youngster and has some residual things like the haircut and the shirts but does not fully fall into that category anymore.
#cod#ghost#soap#call of duty#simon riley#johnny mactavish#simon ghost riley#johnny soap mactavish#modern warfare ii#cod mwii
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Showing off my 2020/21 Assassin's Creed art because why not
I was 11/12 when I drew this anyway 😭 (I think only the last drawing is from 2021/22?? I can't remember)
Let's start with Desmond's famale copy who would be specifically a direct descendant of Connor (she was Desmond's romantic partner too so...technically they were cousins???)
Yeah I know AC has a protagonist named Layla now but that was in 2020 so whatever lol (I remade her story now and she's called Millie and have her own lineage. I even took inspiration from some elements of my family to create one of the assassins in her lineage.)
Desmond miles cearense (Brazilian meme where people from Ceará have huge heads) (And I needed to say that sorry Sam)
Yes, I'm the girl with the ponytail over there 😭 (In case you can't see what it says, "bro, why you, connor and arno is so hot?!" (Damn I developed brain meltdown writing this))
I used to be a fangirl of Desmond, Connor and Arno for some reason (I still am, to be honest lol. Only Connor changed though...Altaïr and Ezio are there. Desmond and Arno remain the same. Connor is cute but he's not really my type.)
AC ocs (aka just self insert to be shipped with the game characters because I really wasn't in the mood to write a decent story for them)
What even is this outfit 😭 Not even for me to do some details on the front of the outfit but no, it's just the outfit of a fashion-savvy or lazy assassin
And yes, Kally was supposed to be Myllie's daughter with Connor who would unexpectedly appear in France during the French Revolution and met Arno??? (I heard somewhere that Arno and Connor had met, but I just ignored that fact and told myself it was an "AU")
And yes, it's kind of like Layla would suddenly appear from Myllie's lineage because I didn't intend to make Kally have children, at least not important ones for the brotherhood lol (Btw only Layla/Millie and Kally were remade, I definitely don't want to remake this disaster called Myllie bc she just wouldn't fit in this era 💀)
Anyway, let's stay away from these OCs for now. (I assure you that only Layla will appear, but it's not a big deal)
This was supposed to be Desmond in the art style of a specific friend of mine (who went by Eddsworld Loves Tomtord, Luanne, and other names I don't want to mention)
I miss them :( (They gave up on YouTube and disappeared from Discord, they probably got a social life I guess.)
Layla in a hood (or it was supposed to look like that)
Yes, her blouse was just that 😭😭 I thought it would be modern for her and also it was kind of an attempt to test out other styles, and it looked much better in my head. (I didn't hate it, though. I was trying new things after all.)
FeM! EdWaRd KeNwAy
Just Edward with long hair and boobs, nothing unusual (I really don't know how Mary/James would fare pretending to be a woman in this universe, because logically he would just be himself????)
James Cearense Kidd (I know these jokes aren't funny, I just didn't want to leave anything vague :I)
I used to have a great admiration for them (I still do, but I just can't follow the whole game knowing that she dies and Edward can't do anything :(()
Jon (Arno) Dorian
It was supposed to be Jon, a character from Eddsworld, wearing Arno's clothes but it can be seen as Arno himself if you ignore the floating heads (Yes, that's Tom and I shipped TomJon, I even used fanarts of them on my old Youtube channel and Amino 😭)
Btw I still posted both drawings on eddsworld and assassin's creed amino communities
Finally the last one (I really didn't expect that I had so few AC arts, to be honest lol. I ended up seeing this artbook and it seems I was still more into Mortal Kombat at this time.)
Yes, I used to ship Ezio and Connor (with no genderbend thing, but I imagined that Ezio would probably flirt more with Connor if he was a woman lol)
And I believed that there weren't that many arts of this ship (and technically there really aren't, I rarely find anything related to these two. But I recently discovered that there are things about this ship on AO3 lol)
And yes, I look like a fushoshi here and I'm not proud of it.
And while I was writing this, I ended up remembering that there was a specific art of Edward with his group but I don't remember where I left the drawing (or if I threw it away) 😭
There are probably a lot of AC arts that I have done, but I could only find this artbook, which is a little sad though :(
And wow, I really evolved after these arts... I really enjoy looking at my old arts because of this. It reminds me of how much I worked hard to get the skills I have today :) (although I still don't feel so satisfied with them lmao)
#Writing this was hard work#Like really#So I hope someone likes/read this#idk#assassin's creed#ac#assassin's creed oc#desmond miles#arno dorian#connor kenway#edward kenway#james kidd#mary read#I miss 2020/21
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🦈
Hullo! I’m seven-gill (also written as 7gill). If you want, you can call me Seven or Sev. I’m also known as MelonHarvest on DeviantArt (https://www.deviantart.com/melonharvest). You can use whatever pronouns you want.
What’s a seven-gill? It’s a type of shark! Although I’m specifically referring to the Broadnose sevengill shark (Notorynchus cepedianus).
This blog is primarily focused on my artwork, so (at the time of me typing this) I don’t really plan on reblogging anything unless I really want to share it. If you wanna see stuff I think is cool, check out my likes page.
I post whatever, whenever, but as of now my primary output is fanart for the young-adult fantasy series Wings of Fire by Tui T. Sutherland. I've been a fan of it for over 10 years, but admittedly I've grown out of the actual books themselves (I stopped after The Poison Jungle). Even if I don't read them anymore, I love to draw the characters anyway! It's fun :)
I’m also really into marine life and the ocean in general. Specifically the weirder, deeper residents. I’m actually curating a list of interesting aquatic (or semi-aquatic) organisms, so if there’s one you’d like to share, PLEASE DO!!! I want to see them so badly, even if it’s already on my list (currently 300+ entries strong). I’d type out my other interests, but you can probably gauge them from my posts/likes.
As a disclaimer, I am over 18 years old. I’d probably rate this blog PG13 because I may engage with posts featuring minor gore or non-sexualized nudity. If my artwork/posts ever feature any content of that nature I will provide a generous warning*, although I can assure you I will never post or like anything explicit (ie. pornography, graphic violence, etc..). I will not tolerate that here. My blog and likes are pretty tame and mostly PG. I bring this up because I’m aware some of my followers are minors, and I tend to post fanart for a series aimed at tweens and teens.
*This does not apply to my likes since I can’t provide a warning with each post. As an assurance, I very rarely like anything that features anything gross or risque. With that said, if any of that bothers you, proceed with caution.
Art
I use Autodesk Sketchbook and Procreate, plus an iPad and apple pencil to create my digital art. For traditional art I tend to go with acrylic paint or a good ol’ fashioned pencil. Whatever I feel like.
I do not do requests, commissions, or art trades at this time. HOWEVER, there’s a possibility that will change in the future. I will update this if that happens.
Please don’t repost my artwork to other platforms without my permission, thank you! I’ll probably say yes anyway. If you must, please remember to credit it to my Tumblr or DA account.
For my WoF art, I tend to favor a cartoonish style influenced by the 2D works of Disney/Dreamworks and AnimatedWings- a fan organized unofficial Wings of Fire animation project. Of course, I add my own flair. It’s an exaggerated, streamlined, expressive look that I find highly appealing, and I think it fits the anthropomorphic characterization of the dragons. I try to put emphasis on shapes, faces, colors, and silhouettes to keep the characters interesting and varied. I don’t always follow canon and may exaggerate characteristics with my own headcanons. I will admit that sometimes I can fall into an uncanny valley where the dragons look too human in the face, but I try to avoid that. I’m learning. Since I’m not animating these designs, I allow the dragons to be a little more complicated and detailed.
You are welcome to use/reference my designs for your own work. I’ve definitely taken my fair share of inspiration from others, especially AnimatedWings.
***
Cya!
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*blinks* headcanons *blinks*
okay. i am almost a month late to this ask hi @ethanmilo ... sorry about that... and i will be using it to give the barty hcs you asked for over a month before this but the ask expired... sorry about that again... my bad time is scary
but yes barty headcanons. these may end up leaning into bartylus territory because i am So obsessed with them right now but i have no idea what i'm going to write yet so we'll see HAHA
(jumping back here after writing this, most of these are lighthearted but some do get a bit more serious/dark, nothing out of character for what you see scrolling on maraurders tumblr but i just don't want people to be shocked by the tone shift)
he doesn't take day-to-day school life seriously and fucks around in most of the classes he doesn't skip altogether BUT his competitiveness is not to be underestimated. he's barely in class and he never pays attention but he gets away with it because he's so smart that when he started school he was already suuper advanced. he just kept working on his own and so was always way ahead of whatever he was supposed to be learning, so he's super annoying and disruptive during classes but when it comes time to it he's still at the top of all his classes. he and reg are always warring for the number one spot and they're a nightmare to be around during exams because they are SO competitive
he'd give himself those shitty stick and poke tattoos at like age fourteen, if you've seen the videos of kids on tiktok with the ugliest shoddiest tattoos you've ever seen you know what i mean... i just found this image on pinterest and this is Exactly the sort of shit he'd have. i think he'd have always been constantly drawing on his work and skin with a quill/pen and he does not fear permanence. the moment he found a way to give himself tattoos he was doing it.
the absolute biggest shit stirrer you've ever met, everything he does is always in the hopes of pissing someone off. he will lie, he will argue, he will push and shove his way into a confrontation and when someone eventually breaks his nose he just starts laughing
he knows Everyone. he has connections to everyone in whatever city he's in, he constantly "knows a guy" and every time it's the most absurd story that his friends have never heard a single word of but it's 100% true. his lore is infinite. and people expect it to be limited to just where he lives but no, he could go to a whole new country and still be being stopped every 5 minutes by some old friend who's thrilled to see him
related to the above, he is that Coolest Fucking uncle. he's awful with kids but god damn it if he doesn't have the most legendary stories to tell luna as often as she could ever want!!
he knows a shit ton of languages. he started learning them because he was bored and it eventually it just became a Thing and he's fluent in like 4 or 5 but can hold a decent conversation in upwards of 10 others too
he looks like he smells bad. he wouldn't smell bad when he was younger, still too used to certain privileges of his class, but the further he strayed from his father and family, especially into young adulthood, i think he would start to—unless regulus was in his life, in which case he'd better smell like fucking roses if he ever wanted to be seen anywhere even Near him in public
i heavily associate him with nu metal and post industrial music but i also think that when he was younger he would've been suuper into all those whiny indie rock bands that normal people call midwest emo, music nerds crucify you for calling midwest emo, and i have no clue what to call. he'd totally have his own band inspired by them too, and he totally has the voice for it—the voice that's objectively terrible but works perfectly for that style of music
he doesn't talk about how he feels like ever but those close to him have worked out ways to get him what he needs when he needs it. he refuses to ask for help but his friends know him well enough that they don't need him to ask, they can pick up his question in far fewer words, and even though it's still hard for him to even imply that he needs help it's a lot easier when he can talk around the issue rather than having to actually using his words. his friends know that it'd be better if he Did use his words but they also know that if they tried to stop letting him get away with not asking properly he'd just stop trying to ask at all
his favourite film genres are horror and action, the gorier the better. he loooooves all the saw films
he's super messy, his room is a fucking NIGHTMARE. shit EVERYWHERE. clothes strewn all around, dishes stacked in several tall piles, three different rubbish bins that are each around 70% full from the times he's been forced to "clean up" and eventually gotten bored/distracted. regulus despises it and refuses to go anywhere near his room meanwhile evan is so excited because every time he goes into barty's room he discovers a new species of mould. sometimes when he's really lucky barty will kick over a pile of clothes to find something and like eight cockroaches scurry out (evan immediately rushes to grab as many of them as possible before they disappear and then takes them home)
by the time he was a preteen he'd given up on the idea that his father would ever be proud of him, had flipped to doing everything in his power to anger him further, entirely stopped caring about the consequences because if his father would hate him no matter what he did why not make it reflect badly back on him, since he cared so much about his public image as a politician. he never intended to leave though, because he couldn't bear the thought of leaving his mother with him. that was until he pushed too far with his dad, got too sucked into the lifestyles of others who'd given up just like him, fell too deeply into the depression and the anger and the violence, until he crossed a line and his mother was looking at him like she was disappointed, too. he realised that he was trying so hard to stay for his mother but staying was making him a worse person and it wasn't worth it anymore if she could no longer see what he was doing as a sacrifice, and only as surface level "badness". he hated leaving his mother more than he hated his dad but in the end staying was only making things worse for the both of them
he uses humour and stupidity as a defence mechanism, and while he does find it fun to do ridiculous and reckless things he also does it because it gives him a role to fill. he can't stand being genuine because he's terrified of rejection, so he'd rather lean into all the superficial judgements made about him. if when someone shuffles away from him in public transport he bares his teeth at them and when someone expects him to be stupid he purposefully misunderstands a simple concept, then nobody actually knows him and nobody can hurt him in a way that matters. the person they insult isn't actually him so they can't possibly get to him
he is VERY judgemental and he and regulus can spend hours talking shit about anyone from lifelong classmates to complete strangers. it surprises everyone that he actually gets along with remus really well, but it's because remus has a more judge-y side that he hides when with anyone but regulus and, apparently, barty
he and dorcas are the gay man and lesbian best friends duo and people have probably mistaken them as a couple before, which they'd both be mortified by. "have they seen us?!?!"
okay i'm forcing myself to end it there because i have an essay draft to finish and a substantial amount of french homework to do in the next like 4-5 hours (nobody is allowed to say shit about my sleep schedule i don't want to hear it HAHAHA) and i've already been writing this for WELL over an hour so i really should stop giving myself ways to procrastinate, i hope these were enough to make up even slightly for the very long wait <//3 ah barty crouch jr, the one and only love of my life... i would be utterly terrified of you in real life but i would also be very attracted to you from a safe distance which is basically the highest form of compliment i can possibly give a person
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[LADS Translation Review] Story Event: Journey Footprints (Xavier)
ABOUT: This is a series of blog posts where I share my thoughts on the translation and differences between the EN version and original CN script. English is my first language, Chinese second. I am no language expert so expect my takes to be imprecise at times, tho I will do my best to present them accurately!
★ [Context] In the prologue of Xavier's route, him and MC talks about the book "How to Get Moving". The cover had a swallow on it which inspired Xavier to make a paper origami version out of the note they were passing around. He later says that he bought the book and invites MC to make paper swallows together.
In the EN version, it is strange considering the title sounds like a motivational or fitness book, and he bought it only to ask MC to make paper birds with him instead of like exercising together. And the fact that Xavier was inspired by what I assume is a drawing/photo of a swallow and was able to make his own paper version. Paper crane? Believable. But...swallows? It is a little hard to imagine Xavier being artsy like that (uhh isn't this a Rafayel thing?).
In the CN version Xavier elaborates that the book is an origami GUIDE book. The title is indeed "Teaching You How to Get Moving", probably misleading on purpose just so MC can tease Xav about it. And Xavier saw the origami swallow that was featured on the cover and decides to make one (presumably by following the instructions, not from imagination). And now things make sense. It's not artsy Xavier but just usual Xavier and his guide books lol.
★ Another very tiny thing to point out is the ending scene where MC finds Xav and pretends to be an old lady, and him initially falling for it replies with "Yes, I'm trying to find...". He says the same in CN, and in addition addresses MC as "granny" before realizing. MC must have had a very convincing elderly voice 😄.
★ There's not much else to comment on since there's no significant missing detail and I actually think the EN translations are done well for this story 💜.
#love and deepspace#love and deepspace xavier#lads#lad#lnds#xavier#恋与深空#沈星回#event#story event#mountain journey#journey footprints#translation review
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The Seventh Blade: Kalis - Bleeding Edge
And so- in the end- the wheel must turn, and a new day must usurp the old. Perhaps then, these long-fallen flowers will feed the soil, and nourish a new bloom. Perhaps the fire will find home in the bleeding rivers and cauterize the land, and the steam will rise into skies of the clearest blue. Perhaps our songs will be of triumphant yesterdays, hard-won and now bearing fruit. But we are Kadungganan- we do not sit idly to await the dawn. We claw at heaven to bring forth our own tomorrow! One more day until the launch of the Gubat Banwa Kickstarter! Fight for another day in the turbulent fires of the Sword Isles, carving out your own story by blade and sheer will in this tactical martial arts TTRPG, inspired by the thousand, thousand colors of Southeast Asia.
I've been posting weapons I've drawn for the game to count down the final week before the launch. This was supposed to be for Swordtember, but the deadline had to be pushed back. 7/7 blades, ending with the KALIS
This blade adorns the logo of Gubat Banwa, at once uniting and splitting in twain. Kalis refers to a number of uniquely Philippine variants of the more widely known collective of kris blades, which appears in several forms across Southeast Asia.
(Diagram by Lorenz Lasco) What separates Philippine kalis from kris seems to be an answer with multiple facets. Some say it's a linguistic matter, others say kalis refers specifically to certain blades from the Sulu archipelago.
(Photos from Raymundo Lucero)
(For comparison, an Indonesian kris) Admittedly, the kalis is a bit of a blindspot in my knowledge. I've done what research I can, and asked those who know better, but I exist a considerable distance away from where these blades belong- physically and culturally. This is, perhaps, where I will be most prone to making mistakes of fact with the information I present. If I make any mistakes, please do not hesitate correct me!
(Photo from Zambasulta Pakukus) On the heels of that disclaimer, let's take a look at the blade. This is definitely one of the most beautiful weapons I've ever had to draw. Philippine kris/kalis tend to be longer and more "sword-like" than those of our neighbors.
(Photos from Johnwick Cabrera) The hilts tend to differ depending on who makes them. Some sport what might be cockatoo/"kakatua" bird-head hilts, some have very ornate junggayan hilts, some feature okir carvings, some are more rudimentary.
(Photos from Dennis Andrew Golez) The blade is used by several peoples in the south Philippines, including the Maranao, the Tausug, and the peoples of Maguindanao. I am most definitely missing a few groups, this is not an exhaustive list. There are differences between the way they build hilts and assemble blades that I don't feel qualified to speak about. And yes, the blades are like that because they are an assembly near the handle.
(Photo from Sulu Utak Shop) Apart from hilt shape and assembly, variations occur in blade thickness, ornamentaion, presence and type of okir carvings, number of curves or seko (odd numbers), length (kalis sundang = "swords", kalis gunong = "daggers") Actually- you know what?
(Photo from Richard Hudson) Since this is the last one in the countdown, I'm going to do something different. I invite you to find the answers yourself. That is part of what Gubat Banwa is meant to be: an invitation to engage in a fantasy setting centered on our cultures, so you can tell stories built on our terms. The cultures in the Sword Isles are NOT the cultures in the real world from which they draw inspiration. It is very much still a fantasy setting. But part of engaging with the setting in good faith is doing your own learning, on things for which you are not owed an explanation. Curiosity rewards the adventurous. The kalis is well-researched. If you're curious about something, you'll find the answers. You don't need me to hold your hand.
Instead, I'm just going to show you some of the coolest kalis I've seen.
(Silver and ivory-hilted kalis from the NCAA) A (relatively) simple but gorgeous build by a modern smith.
(Blade by Zambasulta Pakukus) A pair of kalis from a smith in Zamboanga.
(Blade by Panday Onsboy Maktar) Silver-hilted kalis from Sulu.
(Photos from Arma Filipinas; Polished by the "Blade Barber") Kalis with some gorgeous carvings on it.
(Photos from Sulu Utak Shop) Kris inlaid with a brass naga.
(Photos from Ron Zambaranno) Kalis rehilted by a Lumad group- uncertain which group. Supposedly, the Lumad would take kris they captured from enemies, disassemble them, and rehilt the blade.
This one appears to have a blade that looks like most of the kalis we've seen, but with a hilt similar to Indonesian or Malaysian variants.
(Photos from Raymundo Lucero) Antique Moro kris sundang with a hilt made of fossilized mammoth tooth, ornamented with a silver coin from the 1700s. A personal favorite, as I used the hilt as a reference for one of my favorite designs.
(Photo from Richard Hudson)
(Art by yours truly) As with the panabas, the people who make and use the kalis are still around. There are bladesmiths, scholars, practitioners of Moro Fighting Arts, historians, and just people who live alongside these blades who can tell their own stories better than I ever could.
(Photo from Richard Hudson)
I hope this and all the other threads I made inculcated an interest in some of you- even those who just look at the pictures (I see you)- to look into these blades yourself. Do your due diligence, treat people with respect, and approach what you are unfamiliar with in good faith- and you should be well on your way to learning more than you thought there ever was to know.
The Gubat Banwa Kickstarter launches in 1 day! Check it out here:
A very special thanks to GB team-member onefloor who helped expand my knowledge on this blade. This legend scores the music for Gubat Banwa, check them out here! This will be the last blade post I do for the promotion. I'm going back into the hole I dug in the ground to work on the rest of the weapons I'm drawing for this game. If there's interest, I might do another series of 7 before the Kickstarter campaign ends. Anyway, help us get the word out, small team of creators from the global south, too broke to advertise, etc. etc. you know the drill by now if you've read the other posts. Until next time! Until glory!
#gubat banwa#gamedev#ttrpg#ttrpgs#indie ttrpg#indie ttrpgs#tabletop rpgs#rpgs#rpg#southeast asia#southeastasia#dnd#kickstarter#swords#philippine blade#weapon design#dagger#philippine history#philippine culture#filipino artists#artists on tumblr#kathang langit#help us get the word out!#fantasy#fantasy worldbuilding#swordtember#kris#kalis
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alrighty, lets get this said and done.
i am likely not going to post on here a lot unless i get asks or comments or smthn, just so you know.
anyways, i have a question for you guys. ive got an au that ive been wanting to share and post about for a while, but im not sure if i can. reason being that it is pretty old and it started when i was young and stupid and didnt know how to draw my own poses and stuff, so i would trace the outline of characters and then draw over it. i don't know if i can post or share any of the art from that time since i dont have any of the credits to the owners anymore:( i would love to be able to share my world with you guys since ive put a ton of time and effort into the hundreds of doodles and sketches ive made for it, but i need to know if it's okay. let me be clear on this though so there is no confusion: i am not claiming the art to be mine. i did not trace directly over most of the art, i just copied the general shape/art style/pose and then turned it into my own characters. not all of the art for this au is traced.
anyways, with that out of the way i want to explain a little about the au so that i can know if anyone would actually want to see it.
so it's basically a mashup of my OCs, rottmnt, mha, lmk, and a bunch of other fandoms i've been inspired by. it is set in a post apocalyptic world in the year 2080(sort of). The main cast consists of Casey "Moon"(based off of me), Jupiter "Dellta"(based off a friend/sister of mine), Jasper "Spots", Raphael Montero, Keigo "feathers"(based off hawks from MHA), Kat(based off bakugou from MHA), Deku(based of Deku from MHA), Felix, Sandro, and Pancake(it comes in WAY later tho). these guys are known as "The Gang." aren't i so creative with names? they are also the people i draw the most. there are, of course, side-ish characters who play major roles on the story but aren't in the gang. as for the relationships between the characters, here u go: Jupiter, Casey, Jasper, and Raph are all siblings. Raph is the oldest by 2 years, Casey and Jupiter are twins, and Jasper is younger by a month. technically Jasper, Jupiter, and Casey are triplets. but they were raised by different people so jasper celebrates his birthday on a different date than the twins. they have a very complicated and definitely not realistically possible relationship with their Bio Mom but ill explain that in another post if ya'll want. Deku, Casey, and Kat are all in a relationship. Yes it is a threesome. no i do not care. please do not hate, it isn't that big of a deal. Jupiter and Felix are in a relationship. jupiter and keigo are besties. jupiter is sandro's adoptive mother(comes in much later). casey is pancake's adoptive caretaker(comes in much, much later). now for the explanation of the setting, yay! so, it is a post apocalyptic world that has been brought to ruin. the world divided itself into different Sectors, which are areas set up around still standing cities around the world.(i can explain how al that got established and all that stuff in another post if it is wanted.) The sector that the story takes place in is the New York Sector. it is a bit larger than Texas and was named the NY sector cause NY was the last city standing in that area at the time. NYS has 8 safe zones inside it. Safe Zones are walled off areas that are safe from Corrupted(ill explain that next). SZ are like towns or bases that people and yokai all live in. every zone is different and has different kinds of people. th zone that the gang usually interacts with is zone five(basically the blackmarket of the safe zones.) (ill explain what th different zones are like in another post as well.) okay, now for corrupteds. these guys are complicated and hard to explain w/o a picture for reference, so ill do my best and make a seperate post about them later. basically, they are the zombies or kraang of this world. they are the product of a failed lab experiment. A team of scientists were working on a project to make trees produce twice as much oxygen, but some bad guys called Seekers(once again, ill make a seperate post for these guys) broke into the lab and did something to the trees. they made them start producing these strange spores that began bringing corpses back to life zombie-style. but these weren't zombies. the corpses became mutated and horrifying monsters that would kill on sight. the more spores were released, the more corrupteds came to life. and the spores also mutated other trees, causing them to produce the spores as well. the corrupteds can only live as long as they have an intact heart organ inside of them. they are attracted to light and will kill on sight. although most of them are blind, so i guess they kill on sound?? anyways, as trees became more infected, their roots became vines and they started overgrowing everywhere, with huge vines the size of giant redwood trees(yes i had to search up giant trees to scale this) growing up buildings and through streets.
alrighty. wow. i can't believe you are still here. thank you for bearing with me. please tell me if you want more of this au via comments or asks. any questions go in the ask box. i do have some disclaimers for this tho: i don't do digital art, all this will be traditional drawings. also, i don't have this as an actual comic. it's more just a bunch of drawing that a the explanations to are in my head so i will likely post art and then explain the story bit to it typed out.
also important thing to add to the au:
TW!!! Blood, gore, swear words, trauma, physical abuse, psychological abuse, fighting, horror, queer ships, threeway ships, implied attempts, implied seizures, dark humor, mental breakdowns, panic attacks, sensory overloads, ect. it isn't as bad as it sounds i promise 😅
oke, i'm done now. thanks for reading all this and i hope for your feedback and/or much wanted advice or recommendations. like i said, any questions please go in the ask box and any requests for explanations or art go there too.
byeeeeee :)
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. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁ ⟡ ݁ . ⊹ ₊ ݁. . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁ ⟡ ݁ . ⊹ ₊ ݁.
Dear fellow humans,
A brief letter of saying hi again from me…
Hello, I’m back and have since evolved in age, art style, and life!
I’m Tapi, to reintroduce myself, and I’ll be on tumblr and Bluesky from here on out (twitter migration due to blocking becoming insignificant).
I leave this letter here to give those willing to read and wave back a few updates <3
. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁ ⟡ ݁ . ⊹ ₊ ݁. . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁ ⟡ ݁ . ⊹ ₊ ݁.
. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁ ⟡ ݁ . ⊹ ₊ ݁. . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁ ⟡ ݁ . ⊹ ₊ ݁.
✦Art update ✦
My style has improved tons and I love it and drawing again!
I cleared out most old posts! But out with the old, in with the fresh <3
NSFW art will be included with my bluesky, and I’ll post SFW crops on here, a warning!
. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁ ⟡ ݁ . ⊹ ₊ ݁. . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁ ⟡ ݁ . ⊹ ₊ ݁.
✦everything else update because I’m lazy ✦
✦ A few things! For starters, I am chronically ill and badly affected by it progressively; BUT! Im in a good home now with a loving family and partner, I’m taken care of and have my own persistence of life and my god (yes I’m religious) to guide me! Im keeping a positive outlook I hope to spread to those I interact with
✦I’ve started writing again! Currently, my co-writer and lover have started a huge ffxiv canon project; our take on ffxiv that follows our wols, the npcs they’re shipped with, and a peculiar Hrothgar as our main cast!
The visual aesthetics and themes are very tarot card, dark fantasy, the witcher, and from software inspired.
In short: dark fantasy ffxiv
I might post snippets of our msq? Maybe full chapters? I’m unsure, but would love to share my writing once more!
✦expect a baldurs gate 3 project too!
Good to see you again!
Best regards,
✦tapi~
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Blog intro and greetings
Here’s my blog! This is me (hiiii I’m darekasama, mid-20s she/her Italiaaaan) Some post made you curious so you came to sightsee. I’m writing a story, slow burn, LGBTQ I’m having lots of fun… and I hope you will too. I got a fantasy world There is magic around Also geese (actually dinosaurs) running around! The main duo are dudes Both can do wild stuff Drama that makes you go “wooo” That’s my jam!
Aaaaaaan CUT.
Now that I got your attention by singing...
(Updated as of October 2024)
Greetings!
My nickname is darekasama (mid-20s she/her Italian) and I'm a certain someone who mostly enjoys life.
My interests include but are not limited to:
writing and storytelling
drawing and art of many kinds
small crafts and general fuckery
The genre doesn't usually matter if you can pull me in, but I do have a tendency for fantasy and romance. I also think animals are neat and you can always find out something wonderful about the world around you. Big fan of communication and positivity!
I am very passionate about what I do however don't be surprised if I disappear for weeks at a time. Sometimes I'm ruminating, sometimes I'm having a fistfight with life. Metaphorically. And I'd rather keep out the bad vibes from my happy corner.
Feel free to talk to me in any capacity! Dinosaurs may bite but I don't. Questions about characters? Worldbuilding? Plotting? Random pieces of information you never got to tell someone? Come at me!
What can you find on this blog, you ask?
Anything that is tangentially included in the points above and especially stuff about my current WIP. Could be my ramblings on the outline, random bouts of inspiration, some cool sentences and snippets and on very good days I may put up a drawing too because I can do art of my own characters (yeaaaa)! Very slowly and it takes me forever, but it might happen.
I’m still tinkering my tags on tumblr, the main ones for now are:
reblog Curious what I do in my free time? Go check it out.
my blog What I post myself. On the tumblr. Do do do dooo
my writing Look at what I can do with words!
my art Look at what can I so with pigments!!!
project tl Look at it!!!!!!!
Try also:
dromaeosaurs A.K.A. the sickle clawed raptors
interesting Stuff that makes you go huh
inspiration Stuff that makes you go wow
resources Stuff useful for art and/or writing
writeblr
artblr
art
What’s the WIP about?
After an unspecified amount of time, HERE will be a masterpost more in detail about it. Check back later and click on that or any mention of the project to jump to it.
You may recognise this WIP from the old NaNoWriMo forums. Yes it’s the same.
Below is a bite-sized appetizer. I proudly present…
Project TL
The story that has monopolised my fantasies. It' is currently a seven books series, comprised of a quadrilogy and a trilogy. All are outlined and book 1 is actively in the works.
Book 1: Runaway Heir (working title)
The main protagonist LIAM is a young noble boy who due to his mentor's untimely departure from life, instead of studying martial arts, spends his summer completely unsupervised getting his nose into the local drama, adventuring, and treasure hunting. Someone please reign him in fast.
Meanwhile, the other protagonist and future love interest TERI is in his last year of apothecary apprenticeship and encounters mostly self inflicted troubles in everyday life that he solves by running away or shapeshifting into a dinosaur, whichever works. Unfortunately, it really doesn’t.
And this is an early spoiler… they become roommates.
Featuring:
Narrators who are older versions of the main couple! Good ending is certain and self-reflections were made. Maybe.
Magic items and creative problem solving/making by using them.
Teenagers and their questionable decision making. Just imagine.
Fantasy biology & society. When parthenogenesis is involved, family trees and relationships get messy…
Mentions of transmigration and philosophy about life’s meaning.
Paleontologically accurate dinosaurs! Mostly members of the Dromaeosauridae family, the raptors with the sickle claw, but also many more prehistoric beasts...
That’s all for now!
Go scamper around and most importantly… have fun!
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Hihi!
Question: How did you develop your art style, and do you have multiple?(like a more realistic and a more chibi?) Also! Who inspires you to make such pretty masterpieces?
𓅭 𓅰 𓅭 𓅰
Thank you so much!!! You’re so kind!
Sorry, in advance for the extremely long response :') My hand slipped/j
These are the 3 big tips for developing an art style I wish knew when I was younger:
Find the things that inspire you, and break down what you specifically like about them.
Experiment! Try new things! Practice! Your art style will develop on its own as long as you keep creating.
Have fun! Draw what you enjoy and what makes you happy. Your style is yours; you should enjoy it.
When I was younger, I caught myself thinking things like, "I would like to draw the eyes like this, but I can't because it's not my art style." Then I realized that I was getting in my own way. Once I overcame that mental blockade, I started having fun drawing again. When I allowed myself to experiment, it also caused me to improve faster because I could figure out the things I liked and the things I didn't like. Everyone's art journey and process are different, but this helped me personally.
Yes, I do have multiple different art styles. I have my regular art style, a cartoony art style (I am not currently happy with it. I have a lot to work on), a silly doodle art style, and a realism style (or as close as I can get to it). I also draw eyes differently depending on the feeling I want. For example, I draw tear ducts on characters that I want to have a sort of scary horror vibe, and I don't on other characters (I don't really know why or how it started). I also experiment a lot, which causes my art to always look slightly different.
I also like to prioritize drawing the things that I enjoy the most. I really like drawing faces and expressions so I've practiced that the most (along with neglecting things I don't enjoy like coloring, I'm working on it I swear, I digress).
There are also a ton of little trademarks that show up over and over again. Like giving characters sideburns or hair strands that frame their faces, never adding highlights in eyes, adding swirls in hair, and there is this weird thing where I associate the number of eyelashes I give characters to their personalities (I couldn't explain it if I tried 😅). I think it's important to stumble upon little things you enjoy drawing and to keep doing it.
I never made a list of things that inspire my art even though I really should. Below, I'll list off some artists who inspire me who you can find here on Tumblr.
☆Cryptidw00rm
(also highly recommend their YouTube animatics they're absolutely breathtaking)
☆Seiishindraws
☆Sinlizards.
☆Nanamis-username
☆Viria
(their drawing tutorials have left a lasting impact on me from when I was younger. I really suggest looking them up; they're really in-depth. I couldn’t find the original posts, but it's the first results when you Google "viria art tutorial".)
I'm always instantly enamored whenever I see these artists' works. They are such a huge inspiration. Please go check them out!
There are also a ton of other artists and things that inspire me too, but I'll spare y'all for now. >:)
As a bonus, here is a little example of how my art has developed. I just found my old art from each of the listed times. This is my OC Amaryllis over the years.
Below are some collages of sketches that I hope will showcase my style (these took forever to compile)
And finally, have a Megamind that I am proud of but never posted *thumbs up*
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Something I don’t see talked about (and yes I know that’s a loaded opening sentence but I have feelings so I’m going to ramble) is how it feels to come to art late.
Like people throw out examples like George Clooney being 40 or something? Or Samuel L Jackson, or you know there are many, of people who came into something older and then were fantastic at it. It’s like a “it’s never too late” reassurance and ok cool, cool, but that doesn’t really help.
I didn’t draw as a kid. I hated art class at school because they didn’t teach. I wouldn’t know how to get the effect I wanted and given no guidance (but plenty of “that’s not what I wanted” criticism). If I found a workaround it was wrong. Like I spent a ridiculous amount of time drawing a model train once by measuring every single line. Best drawing I did as a kid but my teacher told me I was never to do that again as I should spend no more than an hour on the homework.
Part of this was probably being undiagnosed autistic. I need structure and rules and I need to understand. I can’t just experiment how I probably should. So I internalised the “I am not artistic, I have no artistic flair” and I didn’t doodle or decorate. I would be envious of the other kids who did. My notes always looked so boring. We didn’t do art at home. Mum always tells the story of how she was excluded from art class at school for “being a waste of public resources” and so is adamant she can’t draw.
For some reason at 19 I decided I wanted to draw. But again with an undiagnosed autistic need for things to be “right” and obviously any lines I made were ‘wrong’, plus the computer was where I sought answers I fell very quickly into tracing photographs. That was a huge mistake because it taught me nothing and only made it worse if I tried to draw without the crutch - as obviously that was much much worse in comparison.
You see I didn’t have the willingness to draw something awful that little kids have (because to them it isn’t awful) and I judged myself so so harshly. I wanted to draw what I imagined and I found workarounds, like modelling programs to make my own pose references, or smushing multiple references together - I still do this and I absolutely hate it. It doesn’t help but it’s like that bandaid trying to hold a water leak back - it’s better than what I can do without it, so I keep going back for fan events etc. as I feel if I’m gifting someone something it needs to be the best I can do (and merlin knows I am deeply ashamed of what I have posted for past exchanges, 30+ hours or not of effort it was baaaad).
A few years ago I decided enough was enough and I needed to “go back to basics” and get away from the computer. I have got a ridiculous number of courses from places like Udemy/Domestika and enough art supplies to open a small store. I talk a good game - I can sound like I know - but my hand does not.
The problem with the YouTube videos or the courses is these people are skilled - obviously, I mean that’s the point - but sometimes they will show their “old art” from when they were 13 or something and it’s better than what I can do now, or maybe at 9 or something it was about the same but that’s 9 - I’m going to be 34 this year.
I’m still that kid that wants to be told what steps to take. I am still flailing and I still don’t know how best to move forward. Worse I am not a kid and so I feel ashamed I guess. And I’m also alone because there is no actual person I can talk to. I have looked into in person art classes but there’s nothing suitable. I need to find a path forward.
But to circle back to “coming into art late”. I’m 33 and surrounded by so much inspiration (I see art and I so desperately want to be able to make something half that good). But that’s a curated thing because people only post their good stuff (obviously) and so I don’t want to post my shitty stuff so I can’t engage with “art tumblr” or whatever, and I’ve never been good at engaging anyway. I have always felt like an outsider in every community I have tried to join. Plus with fucking AI I don’t want to post my stuff online (although it’s so bad if it did get scraped it would probably act like poison).
So yeah basically flailing and lonely.
It’s deeply demoralising and frustrating. I have never put in the practice time that I should have but that is more to do with my chronic mental health issues than anything - but that then compounds the age problem as I am not 19 any longer. It has been getting on for 15 years - actually I hate putting it like that because then I have to see that I have been wanting to draw for nearly half my life and I have still not managed it. I am still flailing around near the starting line.
Anyway yeah I just feel like nobody talks about being older, and still being shitty at things, and how damn lonely and scary that is. I get majorly stressed out everytime I try and do “serious learning” as I guess it’ll take time and I will be shitty for a lot longer. Maybe there’s also a point here about adulthood and immediate gratification I don’t know. I just know I wish for the impossible to be able to be the child I never was I guess, to start art when people are supposed to - as a kid - and get this stage done and so I can be better. Is that just me wanting to skip the work? Maybe I don’t know.
It’s as I said - I have feelings.
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It got too long and heartfelt in the reblog, so I decided it deserved its own post XD
BOOM. MY OLD ART FROM LIKE 2018/19???
This is my bestie's Harry Potter OC that I drew for her! I actually had some similar drawings of both our OCs, but they're not in my possession right now XD and maybe they'll never be! But it's cool to see how very far I'll e come since then.here's some of my more recent art, just so you can see them side by side XD
For me, personally, seeing them side by side makes me giddy. They're so different, it's hard to link them together, hard to look at them and think the same person drew them. But I did. And as someone who grew up with another fabulous artist (@/rustic-space-fiddle), | was always impatient, always discouraged to look at my own art and see everything it was missing. I wanted to draw like Rusty, but I was so very unskilled. I was very eager to reach the day when I could match her skill, when I could look at my art and see in it everything that I saw in hers.
And today, I can honestly, confidently, gratefully say that I have arrived.
Obviously, if you go check out Rusty’s art, you’ll see I am by no means as good as her. But I learned awhile ago that I’ll never be, no one will—not only am I biased that she’s the best artist in the world (because she is), but Rusty draws the way only Rusty can, and the way only she will. Others may draw similarly, others may copy her, but art is like a fingerprint. Each style and piece is unique to the person who drew it. Therefore, it’s unfair for me to compare myself to Rusty when I could never possess her fingerprint in the first place. But that doesn’t change the fact that I used to compare myself to her so harshly—and the fact that to a younger me, I have achieved exactly what I wanted.
2018 was not the year I started drawing. Was it perhaps the year of my first exploration into the digital realm? Yes, but before then, I was drawing horses. I love horses, and I loved them so much they were all I ever drew. My walls were adorned with dozens of drawings of horses. I’ve since fallen out of the habit of drawing horses so regularly, but all those drawings are what started me drawing. I learned to hold a pencil and put it to paper drawing horses, and then from there, I just started drawing everything else. I only recently started drawing in seriousness, in the grand scheme of things. A year or two ago. And then I was drawing people most of the time, and the occasional dog or cat. And there were many bumps along the way—my discouragement at my own ability, as well as my inability to draw digitally, as I was quickly coming to love. The iPad I used at the time simply didn’t support Procreate after awhile, so I was using my sister’s iPad.
There are also the artists which inspired me. Obviously, rustic-space-fiddle was—and still is—my number one support and inspiration, she was my goal. But then I got instagram and I saw people’s different styles, and while I don’t know where exactly the inspiration from them comes from, it’s certainly there, perhaps in the courage with which I now draw. The second biggest inspiration in my life has been, without a doubt, Jojo. Her art style, which I adore, is something I have tried to imbue in mine—I’ve been told before that it can be seen, but I’m unsure of that. Still, even if I do not draw in her style, I think I draw in her energy. In the way that I draw Legend, that style, that goal, that love for him and her art, I think it’s there every time I draw Legend, and even in the other things that I draw too. She may never know, but she is perhaps the only other artist in the world I have ever really hoped to be like.
Anyways. I guess what I am simply trying to say is I’m happy. I’m proud. I’m content with my art, in a way I once hoped I would achieve, and while I know I have many things to learn, I approach them without that lost hopelessness I used to feel, but with passion, curiosity, and the determination to grow better.
If you’ve read this far, thank you. You didn’t really have any reason to read this—even if we have talked, even if we are mutuals, I’m still a stranger whose ramblings about her art hold almost no weight at all. But you did anyways, because you were curious, because you cared, because it was interesting, moving, inspiring. Whatever it was, thank you :)
I’ve come a very long way. And I’ll go a very long way more. I hope you’ll be here to see it all!
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Intro on me / what this page is for:
Hi there, I'm millie. I'm a 33 year old trans (MtF) artist & photographer. I suffer from PTSD / Depression and chose to channel my emotions into my artwork in hopes that my work will help others and showcase that just because it seems dark doesn't mean there isn't further hope to hold onto.
I started my journey into art by being told by the VA your not allowed to work again due to ptsd triggers.... and told to find a hobby when asked what to do now.
Enter in stage 1: recoloring images and color pop on images (I still do this on request for models occasionally). This taught me a bit on how color schemes work together and how to draw lines on different types of images.
Stage 2: learning how to draw images using models or objects as a reference. This stage is self explanatory.
Stage 3: using camera to capture my own images to reference with.
Stage 4: letting my mind take over and express emotions into imagery.
Now I do many of these steps over and over to explore further into art and many lovely models help pave this way including some many of you know. @woodsmanwife (Lydia luxy), @evahousewife
& reblogs with my edits from blogs you may also know such as: @qos4blk , @sexyher and many others.
To all the fans of my work and the models that helped me to get where I am, deeply in my heart I thank you ♥️♥️♥️♥️.
My dms are open to all, and yes I do take edit requests (however not every image I recieve do I see a inspiration from)
Also the links I post are to my art gallery where you can purchase my artwork directly.
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