#yes I know the ship names for both of those but I am trying to be considerate and stay out of tags for those fans by not having them in the

[theglamorousferal]

Persephone's Binding Part 2

Hardcover/Anger Management ship Sacrificial Bride au

AO3 Prompt Part 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14

(Things get a bit angsty here for a bit, but don't worry, it gets back to some of the cracky-goodness!)

After allowing himself to relax for a bit and actually letting his muscles loosen for once, Jason rose from the bath and rinsed himself off under a piping hot and strong shower. He finished the rinse off with a flash of cold water to focus back up and made his way to the vanity where there was basic hotel amenities. He attempted to style his hair and after at least drying it, pulled on the fluffiest robe he has felt since he first moved into the manor all those years ago.

Fuck. The family. The Outlaws...

Jason put his face in both his hands and took a deep breath, then allowed his shoulders to slump as he dragged his hands from his face to his sides. He marched in a lazy manor over to the end of the large bed where he flopped face down. Surprisingly, it wasn't as fluffy as he was expecting and he silently thanked whatever force there was that he wouldn't have to resort to sleeping on the floor or a chair for the familiarity. Though, he turned his head to face the windows, that little reading nook looks like I could easily fall asleep there.

No, stop it. Do I remember the Dimensional Code for home?

Jason contemplated. On one hand, it could be useful, on the other, they could have an entirely different category system here. He spent the next however long trying to remember the dimensional code for his Earth and tracing the swirls of purples and greens out the large windows. A knock startled him.

"Jason? Are you decent?" He stood quickly and pulled the robe tighter together, not quite ready to show his autopsy scars to his soul-owner? A literal goddess? He wasn't quite sure what she was yet.

"Uh, yes, come in, I'm covered." He tried to stand casually next to the bed when he had just been sitting, his hands now in his pockets.

"Hi, so one of my aides figured one thing out about the ritual that is somewhat concerning and also something I probably also should have brought up. Mind if we sit at the window?" She strode in and settled herself with a pillow against the window and waited for him to do the same. Once he was settled, she hesitated for a moment before sighing and looking out the window to the haunting site outside.

"The Infinite Realms has another name, one coined from my Earth." She licked her lips before she spoke again. "It's also known as the Ghost Zone. As the dimension between dimensions, it is also where beings known as ghosts, the Restless Dead, Neverborn, Gods, and all sorts of other beings that thrive off a substance known as ectoplasm reside. As such, I am current Queen Regent of Ghosts." She let him think for a moment before turning to him. "That means I can tell when someone is death-touched." Jason froze. "I didn't mention it before because I know it's super personal, but then my aide figured out that the ritual only worked because of the fact you are and especially since you had spent time here-" She cut herself off as his eyes just bugged out larger with every word that spilled from her lips. "Sorry, I just, I'm death-touched too. I haven't died yet, but I have been around death magic, or radiation, or whatever it is, since before conception. I don't know exactly what you went through, but I know it was deeply traumatic. I can have my healers take a look at your soul and see if it's alright because it kinda radiates a bit how traumatic it was." She bit her lip with one hand raised near her chin.

Jason closed his eyes, taking a deep breath and clenching his jaw tight and blowing the air harshly out his nose. He fell back against the window, allowing his head to knock against the glass. It was warm, as though the sunlight was gently shining upon it. "Yeah." He croaked. "Yeah, I died." He said softer. "I was dead for roughly six months." He dipped his head forward to block his face with his bangs. "Crawled outta my own grave." He laughed bitterly. "Spent a while wandering, a while more in a coma." He swallowed tickly. "Got picked up by my dad's vindictive ex and trained for a while to be an assassin." He looked up at her, making eye contact. "She dunked me in this pit of magic shit, we call it a Lazarus pit in my dimension. It cures those near death and kills the healthy. Fixed me up the rest of the way, or at least the scars and issues I had pre-death. I got to keep these." He allowed the top of the robe to fall away, showing the tops of the large y-shaped scar that ran the length of his torso. She gasped, both hands coming to cover her mouth, tears began to form in her eyes. She reached out as if to touch them and stopped herself, her face turning determined.

"I, Jazmine Nightingale, High Queen Regent of the Infinite Realms, the Mediator, the Caretaker, and all those other titles." She waved her wrist. "Declare that I will help you however you deem necessary. Whether that be helping your soul, returning you to your dimension, breaking this binding, or whatever. You are currently bound to you, and as such that makes you my responsibilities." She paused in her speech for a moment, thinking. "I mean, you're already technically one of my subjects because I think you qualify as one of the Restless Dead, but we'll figure out your classification when we take you to a healer. For now, it has been a long day. I will have one of my aides come to get your measurements for some clothes, I'm sure we have some around here somewhere that should fit you at least for dinner. The aides can get any style you like and it can be made quickly by the seamstresses we have on staff." At his hesitation she added with a smile, "They work in supernatural means, they will not overwork themselves by making an entire wardrobe in a few hours."

She patted the cushion in front of her and stood. "I will meet you at dinner, it's not formal at all, don't worry about dressing fancy, I'm just still in this getup from 'official queen stuff'" she said with air quotes looking tired. "I'll see you in a bit Jason!"

"Yes, um, your majesty." He stood to bow, the robe making it a bit difficult."

"Just Jazz please, for the love of the Ancients." She said with a pained look on her face.

"Right, sorry," he stammered, straightening, "See you later, Jazz." She smiled softly before leaving him to himself. He smacked his hand to his face groaning at himself before flopping face-first into the bed again. "She's the ruler of the dead and she's so determined and nice, what the actual hell? She's so earnest, it's so cute!" he sat up leaning his elbow on his knee. "Okay, operation Romance Plot is go. She isn't put off by the fact you died, this is good, I can work with this. Okay, so castle, let's go with that aesthetic. I'm thinking let's go with a poet shirt and some black slacks for dinner tonight." He claps his hands in front of him, decision made.

As if summoned by his words, there was another knock at the door. A man with bright sky blue skin and a deep plum butler's uniform opened the door, a measuring tape casually thrown over his shoulders.

"Yes, hello good sir. What aesthetic are we thinking for this evening?" he said in a posh accent.

Jason clasped his hands together. "What should I call you? Would you possibly have a poet's shirt and a pair of black formal slacks for this evening?"

"You may call me Jeeves. Yes that Jeeves. I am the personification of the trope of the helpful butler, and as such my power set includes anything and everything that could help me complete the duties of head butler of the High Family's home. We absolutely do have that attire on hand, it would be but a moment for someone to fetch it for us. Now did you have any ideas about future attire?" Jeeves snapped his fingers and a skeleton manifested in a swirl of dust to obey his silent command to gather the requested clothing.

Jason paused for a moment, considering. "How does the Queen usually dress casually around the castle? I know she said she was from an Earth. I don't know where in the timeline her Earth is from and she mentioned that what she was wearing earlier was mostly for special occasions, so I don't want to look like an idiot." He explained.

"Very good sir, she typically dresses in either a less formal toga if she's to be seen anywhere near the public areas of the castle, her armor whilst sparring with her knights, the High Princes and Princess, and if she is only going between her room and study then her far less formal Earth clothing which is a long sleeved blouse and lightwash jeans, typical of the late 1990's and early 2000's."

Jason thought for a moment. He didn't know how long he would be stuck here, but decided that clothes enough to last a fortnight should work. For all he knew, time flowed differently between here and his home dimension. Decision made, he told the butler what he wanted. Measurements were taken, the skeleton arrived with the requested clothes and Jason was left to change into his clothes for the evening. He still is wearing his combat boots because he forgot to ask for a pair of shoes.

Once changed, he realized that he still probably had a bit before dinner and he walked over to one of the bookshelves browsing the titles. There were several classics that he recognized, his favorite, Pride and Prejudice, was there. There were a few as well with Jane Austen's name, but not titles he recognized. He decided to come back to those later and pulled what looked like a collection of fairy tales from the shelf then settled himself lounging in the window nook to read for the next few hours.

[sanjifucker42069]

Buzz Buzz - Sanji x Reader NSFW

Girl........I am down bad.

Word Count: 7,200 words!?!? Girl what the fuck.... This is self-indulgent af.

Sanji finds something of yours that you really would've preferred to keep private. But maybe it wasn't all bad?

Warnings; NSFW MDNI. cis!fem reader, sorry 'bout that, Both Sanji and reader are incredibly awkward, self-conscious, and like one-upping each other, plus size!reader, vibrators, no p in v soz lol. 100% this was written with pre-timeskip anime Sanji in mind, love that cringefail malewife energy. Surprisingly switches all round...also yes I know those with dicks have a refractory period...I just don't care lol

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You had barely made it inside the women’s room when you caught the ship’s cook. He was crouched, holding something small and looking befuddled. What was that? Wait! No, how did he find that!?

"Sanji! Put that down!" You screamed, face on fire.

Sanji shot to his feet, looking terrified at the prospect of being caught, and yet, he still periodically eyed the implement in his hand, making no move to abandon it.

"What is it?" The question sounded innocent, but you knew the flirt was just trying to get a rise out of you. Unfortunately you're only human, and Sanji always seemed to bring out the worst of it.

"You know EXACTLY what that is!" You hissed, trying to lunge for it. Sanji side stepped you with ease. With fire in your eyes, you quickly captured his wrist, backing him against the wall. Sanji blinked at you blankly. His questioning look stopping you in your tracks. "You...you don't know what that is, do you?"

You wanted to faint when Sanji shook his head. What the hell did he mean? You were sure if any of the men on board knew what that was, it would be the perverted cook. With a blush you stared him down.

"It's a massager."

"Oh my dear, you should come to me, I'd gladly rub your stress away."

You honest to gods squealed at that. Recovering, you caged the man in between you and the wall, fist resting next to his head. Your eyes burning as you sized him up. "Are you fucking with me Black Leg?"

"No, I would gladly give you a massage! My hands may be for cooking, but for you my dear, I'll make an exception. Maybe I could use it some time?"

If your face got any redder you would faint. Spitting out a growl, you regarded the man with a sneer. How dare that asshole make fun of you? "You fucking pervert."

Sanji jumped, clearly offended. "How?! I was only offering a shoulder massage. I don't have any ulterior motives, chef's honour."

"It's a personal massager, Sanji." You gritted out. The blonde stared down at you, confusion evident. Gods he was so stupid sometimes! A growl ripped from your throat. "It's a vibrator. A sex toy. I use it to cum."

The velvety soft bullet clattered to the ground. Darting your eyes up, you took in the frozen man. Sanji was growing redder at a rapid pace. He squeaked out something unintelligible. You watched the blush spread down his neck, blooming beautifully. Huh, he really didn't know what it was.

"Oh." He managed. "You...uh...a toy?"

"I have needs Sanji." You deadpanned, pulling away. You didn't miss how he sighed in relief at your retreating form. Man, fuck him! It's not like you left it out in the open for anyone to find it!

"And you...you use it?"

"Well duh...it's not for decoration." You crossed your arms over your chest, feeling uncomfortable at the way he looked at you incredulously. "Look now that we've got that explained, can you piss off and let me wallow in my embarrassment?"

Sanji didn't budge, still looking at you with that odd look on his face, like he didn't quite understand. It caused anger to burn brighter in your chest. You snatched the vibrator off the floor, causing Sanji's eyes to widen. With a huff you stomped to your bed, flopping face down onto it. 

"Miss (Name)?" Sanji asked quietly. You ignored him, trying to suffocate yourself with your pillow. This was humiliating. Why the hell did you have to like Sanji of all people? "Look, (Name), I was just surprised is all-"

You snapped at him from your hiding spot. "We don't all chase the first pretty thing we see to get relief Sanji! Some of us have to take care of our own business."

"Wh-what?" 

All you were doing was digging yourself a deeper hole, but you didn't care. "I saw how disgusted you looked. I didn't ask you to find it. You can go tell the crew how pathetic I am! Oh, (name) can't get anyone to look at her like that, how sad. Poor thing, having to rely on something like a toy. Hahaha! Never mind there's never any stupid privacy on this stupid ship. A-and I can have the urge too! So don't look at me like that! I haven't had sex since I got on this godforsaken ship, so excuse me for getting something to help."

You were purely catastrophising, clear that anxiety had gotten the best of you. Sanji would never be that cruel. You weren't sure when, but judging on how damp your pillow was, you had been crying for some time. Well that's embarrassing. Sanji was the last person you wanted to cry in front of.

The bed creaked from extra weight, causing you to wince. You tried desperately to make yourself smaller, to shy away from the man. Instead you felt his large hand pat the small of your back. You jumped in surprise, causing the hand to falter. It began rubbing small soothing circles, You sighed. 

"Why aren't you leaving? I asked you to piss off."

There was a pause. Then you heard Sanji speak. It was faint, unsure of what to do. 

"And leave a lady to cry alone? I don't think so." You scoffed. "If it makes you feel better-"

"Look I'm sorry for crying-"

"I think it's hot."

You stiffened. Sanji felt you go rigid beneath his touch. The silence grew suffocating, You whipped your head to meet his gaze, eyes wide.

"Fucking excuse me?"

Sanji looked embarrassed, ducking to avoid your questioning eyes. The hand on your back spasmed. "I didn't think it was pathetic...thought it was hot...And I don't think it's true that no one shows you interest-"

That drew a callous laugh from you. "Oh please. You and I both know I'm not drop dead gorgeous like Nami or Robin. You've seen the attention I get from men. You don't look like me and not see the way men avoid you like the plague."

The hand on your back tightened into a fist. grabbing the back of your top. You tried to twist to lie on your back but the hand held you in place. Sanji's voice was dark, an unspoken threat dangling in the air. "Excuse me?"

"C'mon Ji, it's cute you're trying to cheer me up but look at me! You think I'm the kinda girl that has men lining up out the door to fuck? I know how I look, it's why I got this back in Loguetown. Don't need to scare anyone off this way." You waggled the vibrator, laughing.

Sanji clearly did not like the way you were talking about yourself, if the way he quickly flipped you onto your back was any indication. You squealed in alarm, feeling the hard mattress dig into your back. He hovered over you, caging you under him, his legs on either side of your plush thighs. You gulped.

"Are you serious?" He snarled. You stared up at him, his eyes were burning with anger, lips drawn into a frown. You protested weakly.

"Sanji, c'mon man. I know its your whole philosophy that every woman is beautiful, and all that, but let's be real here-"

"Yeah?" He breathed out, daring you to continue. You raised an eyebrow at him.

"You don't have to act like I'm attractive Sanji. When we were in Alabasta you literally tried to cover me up with your jacket after I wore that stupid dancer costume."

The man above you blanched. "Oh (name), you thought I-"

"Was disgusted? Yeah? I don't blame you, it couldn't have been a pretty sight."

"Will you stop that!?" He growled. You froze.

"Wait, you're actually mad?"

Sanji scoffed. "Mad? I'm furious. Who the hell told you you aren't breathtaking?"

"Wh-what? I'm not! I don't need explicit words to see that people don't see me that way. Whenever we go out, it's always men fawning over Nami and Robin, and rightfully so, they're hot. If we need to distract someone? It's always Nami being sexy. You do it too. Nami shows a little skin? You're wagging your tongue like a stray dog. I show a bit of skin? You look like you're in physical pain. What about that day on the deck when we were sunbathing? Nami and Robin had hyped me up to try a bikini. I'd never worn one before. When you saw me in a swimsuit, you couldn't get out of there fast enough, like the mere sight of me hurt you. Haven't worn one since."

"I was in pain." Sanji spat. "I was fucking hard."

What?

You gasped. "What?"  

Sanji's face was a dark red, his ears burning, but he held your gaze, looking furious. If looks could kill you'd be nothing but ash under him. "I was fucking hard." He repeated. "I had no idea you were going to be there half-naked. Had to get out of there quick before anyone saw."

You opened your mouth to speak, but Sanji wasn't done.

"And in Alabasta? I tried covering you because I realised it was a mistake. That I wanted to be the only one to see you like that. And I wasn't lying when I said you having a vibrator was hot! I was in shock at the thought of you using it. I don't think it's pathetic. I think me having to fucking jack off in the bathroom because you bent over in front of me, or made those noises enjoying my food, or I watched you kick some guy's ass, is pathetic. Why can't you understand that you're sexy?"

Sanji took in you under him, chubby cheeks a bright red. Your eyes were wet with unshed tears. His eyes softened. "I'm sorry I ever made you think you weren't gorgeous."

"But..." You started, clearly flustered. "Nami and Robin?"

"Are beautiful, yes. But they aren't you."

"But...you really think I'm pretty?"

"Pretty? Darling I think you're so fucking hot you've made me cum in my pants like a boy more than once."

"Really?!" Your eyes were sparkling. That was a welcome change, Sanji mused. He would gladly embarrass himself tenfold, if it meant you'd see yourself how he saw you. 

"Yeah. Once was not long after we met. You wanted a sparring partner. I thought you were gonna go easy on me, and I wasn't gonna fight back. You were vicious. It was hot." He tried to shrug in his current position. "If you remember you got me in a headlock between your thighs."

"I thought you slunk away because you were upset I hurt you? You made that whimpering noise and looked in pain."

"I do not whimper!" He protested weakly. "I 'slunk away' because I came."

"Oh."

"So I can assure you, I'm a pervert for you too, especially you."

"I think of you when I masturbate!" You blurted out.

It happened quickly. Sanji's eyes grew wide, his breath hitched. You watched as his forearms shook. 

Then he lost his balance. 

You'd love to say he fell head first into your tits, moaning in pure bliss. But that only happens in romance books.

No. He headbutted you by accident, flopping directly on top of you like a dead fish. The two of you hissed in pain. Your head throbbed. Motherfucker. For a scrawny bastard he sure was heavy, clearly all muscle, you mused. All muscle, including the very firm one that was poking you in the hip.

"Are you fucking hard?" You hissed. Sanji propped himself up with one hand by your side, the other rubbing his forehead. 

"Of course I'm hard." He hissed back. "You just told me you masturbate to me. I'm assuming you're using that stupid toy."

"It's not stupid!" You defended. "It can pack quite a punch."

"You could have used me, darling?" He offered halfheartedly, masking his nerves with a fake smile.

You shot him a wry grin back. "Oh that was smooth. Unless you can magically vibrate-"

"I could do better."

"You could let me use it on you."  Hmph. Cheeky. Sanji felt faint at the implications. His cock twitched against you. You widen your eyes at him in interest. "Oh? Would you like to try it? 

"I'd rather try you, thank you."

You laughed honestly. Sanji felt the air knocked out of him when you caged him in with your legs, ankles crossing to dig in his back. He shuddered as you dragged him deeper against you, a dangerous look in your eyes. Sanji loved you, honestly. But sometimes he wanted nothing more than to make you feel as nervous as he did. Mustering all his charm he winked at you.

"So you masturbate to the thought of me?"

Oh that did it. Red bloomed deliciously from your cheeks, your ears, down to where your neckline began. Sanji felt his cock twitch eagerly, pride filling him. You diverted your gaze in embarrassment, puffing out your cheeks. Cute. 

"And if I do?"

"That's cute." He grinned, You scowled up at him. He felt your thighs tighten around him. "Oh, I affect you that much, hm?"

Sanji couldn't help the involuntary squawk that escaped when you flipped the two of you with your hips, taking advantage of your lower centre of gravity. Your weight sat deliciously on top of him, allowing him to effectively crush his cock against your clothed mound. He groaned as you adjusted your position, making yourself comfortable. 

"What was that, cook?" You panted out, trying to minimise how riled up you were. With pure purpose, you leant forward, caging his head between your arms. "Because from where I am you look pretty affected." 

The man below you gulped as you leant forward, moving to rest on your elbows, bringing your face closer. The blush on your cheeks showed no sign of calming down, the only telltale sign Sanji could find that you were embarrassed. Your voice dropped. "If you must know, it's a common occurrence. You drive me wild you silly man. Can I kiss you?"

Sanji laughed, dragging your face down to meet him. He kissed you passionately, hands cradling your face firmly. You smiled into the kiss, sucking gently at his lower lip. With a groan, Sanji reciprocated and then some. The impromptu makeout session halted when you propped yourself up to breathe. You stared down at him with stars in your eyes. 

"Wow." You breathed.

"Yeah." Sanji panted.

Silence. The two of you basking in each other. 

"Would you let me play with you, Sanji?"

You were rewarded with a moan as he nodded, eyes scrunched shut. Eagerly you sat back on his hips. Exploratively, you ran your hands down his chest, rubbing your way back up. Sanji shivered as you began unbuttoning his shirt, fingers clumsy with want. When you got the last button done you couldn't help yourself, feeling all over his chest, as if you were mapping it to memory. Sanji hissed as your nails lightly scratched over his nipples, hips lightly bucking up into you. You hummed appreciatively. 

"Can you stop teasing me, love?" Sanji bit out.  You laughed. 

With no pomp or circumstance, you divest yourself of your shirt, tossing it somewhere behind you.  Sanji whined, reaching up for you. You avoided his hand, crushing your bra-clad chest back to his. You were rewarded with a stuttered sigh.

Sanji felt himself freeze when you licked a stripe up his neck. You were savouring him, stopping to nibble his ear lobe. You had one arm stretched far past his head, the other braced on his shoulder. Sanji bucked his hips at a particularly harsh bite. He could feel you grin against his skin. If Sanji was honest, he felt faint as you kissed back down his neck, stopping when you found his pulse point. Sanji bit back a moan as you sucked harshly, bringing your outstretched hand back to cup his pec. Small whines being the only thing to reward you. 

"S-stop teasing, love." He was more flustered now. Perfect. 

Bzzzz

Sanji froze, eyes wide. He breathed out a small "What the fuck?" watching with bated breath as you pulled yourself back up, a wicked grin on your features. A jolt of electricity shot through him as he felt a vibration against his neck. 

You eyed him hungrily, slowly dragging the vibrator down his neck. The man beneath you was panting, eyes scrunched tight as you dragged the vibrator down to his chest. You circled a nipple with the vibrating tip, causing Sanji to jump. You bit back a moan. 

"Look at me Sanji." You purred. A wave of arousal washed over you as he peered up at you with wide eyes. You languidly toyed with the vibrator, tickling your way down his stomach, the man beneath you squirming. "This okay?"

"Yeah." A whisper. You grinned. 

"Good boy. Balance this for me, okay?" 

The vibrator on his abdomen buzzed idly as you shuffled back. With a wicked glint in your eyes you trailed your hand downwards. Sanji accidentally bucked his hips when your fingers found his belt, making quick work of undoing the buckle. You paused, the man beneath you trying desperately to still. When you deemed him still enough you moved to opening his trousers, fighting your way through a button. You'd never really noticed that Sanji wore his pants higher up on his hips. It made sense, you realised, from a fighting point of view. Huh, you'd have to tag that away for future reference.

"I didn't expect you to have such a sexy happy trail. Gods, so coarse." You moaned, feeling your way down through his hair, You let your fingers lightly touch under his pants. Sanji squirmed. You cooed.

"What a good boy, I'll be taking this back, thank you." You purposefully tickled him as you took back the vibrator, staring at him through lidded eyes. Sanji felt himself freeze, knowing full well what you were planning to do.

Sanji felt an undignified groan escape him as he felt you press the vibrator to his clothed groin with featherlight pressure. You were killing him! 

"Please do something (Name), you are driving me insane."

"Oh? More like this?" You feigned innocence, cupping both the vibrator and his bulge with one hand, and cranking the vibrator up with the other. You watched with perverse satisfaction as the man clenched his fists into your bedsheets. Good. With one hand you slipped the zipper down painfully slow. You made a show of sticking your hand through the opening and began palpating his clothed cock, making sure to squeeze every now and then. 

The man below you began panting, trying to talk but instead babbling something incoherent. You laughed.

With the now intensified vibrator, you slipped it between his parted thighs, placing it directly at the apex. Sanji squealed at that, scrambling to move away.

"Too much?" You cooed, though a genuine questioning tone laid underneath. Looking up to survey his expression, you found him biting onto his hand to muffle his noises. He shook his head.

"Just unfamiliar." He willed his eyes open and tried to fix you with a glare. It failed miserably, and the man instead looked like he was going to cry. 

Would it be so bad to make him cry?

You hummed as a way to acknowledge you saw him. Sanji managed to choke out a strangled, "You're not putting that in my ass."

The laugh that ripped from you was raucous and joyful. You playfully swatted his knee. 

"I wasn't going to go anywhere near your ass!" You managed out through giggles. Sanji blushed. "Geez, getting ahead of yourself, aren't you?"

"Just hurry up and touch me." Sanji muttered. You giggled, withdrawing your hand. The man below you whined at the loss. 

"Relax! Right now, I really just wanna blow you. That okay?" 

"Y-yeah! Fuck, I mean, if you want to?"

"Really wanna. Can I put this against your balls? It'll feel good, promise?"

Sanji shuddered beneath you, the vulgarity of your words hitting him. You were looking at him with hopeful eyes, a far cry from what you were saying. He supposed he could always say no if he hated it. He nodded slowly. 

"Yeah. Yeah, okay."

You squealed happily, hands flying up to try pulling down his pants. When they refused to budge you swatted at his thigh. Sanji let out a little yip, lifting his hips. You grinned wolfishly, tugging at the garment till it reached his mid thigh. You lightly trailed your hands up his thighs, tickling his inner thighs with your light touch. Sanji squirmed. 

When your eyes met his pelvis you whistled lowly. "Now isn't that something? Definitely more than a mouthful. Didn't take you for a briefs kinda guy, to be honest."

Sanji clearly didn't like the tone he perceived from that. He snapped at you, face red. "They are boxer briefs, thank you! They offer the best support. Why am I even explaining this to you anyway? I shouldn't have to justify my underWEAR-"

Sanji's voice pitched high as you cupped him. You rubbed small circles, grinding your palm against him. "Relax! It makes sense, you don't want a ball popping out when you're doing those high kicks. Thought you'd be thankful I pointed out that and not the giant wet patch."

"Would you be quiet? I can feel myself going soft." Sanji whined. You laughed.

"That's not what I'm feeling sweetheart." As if on cue you felt his cock jump at the pet name. You grinned, swallowing the extra saliva that filled your mouth. "As fun as this panty chat is, I'd really like to unwrap my present now."

Sanji stared at you through lidded eyes as your thumbs hooked under his waistband, pulling lightly. He hissed at the feeling. With no real ceremony, you began peeling the fabric away from him. Eyes sparkling as his cock came into view. The head was red and angry, a clear representation at how frustrated he must feel. His cock was lithe, curved, and definitely long. You found that a fitting comparison to its owner.

"Fuck." You whispered. "I'm sorry sweetheart, you're gonna have to tell me if it's too much, ‘kay? I gotta suck you off."

Sanji barely got to respond before you were on him, hands squeezing him. Whatever he was going to say got cut off by a guttural moan. You pumped him a few times, coating his cock in his pre-cum. If Sanji was wriggly before, he was practically fucking your fist. You braced one hand on his hip. 

"Bon Appetit." 

You engulfed him, taking as much as you could into your mouth. A moan tore its way out of you as you tasted him. Gods it was so musky, you needed more. You sucked harshly, causing the man below you to squeal and scramble for purchase. You really weren't going easy on him. 

The wet sounds that ensued were sinful, causing the both of you to feel embarrassed. You didn't care too much, needing to suck this man dry. You'd spent way too long thinking about this. You pumped what you couldn't fit in your mouth, laving your tongue on the underside of his cock. Sanji felt dizzy by the sensation, the heat in his groin growing. He couldn't help himself, hips bucking into your mouth. You gagged as he touched the back of your throat.

"Sorry. Sorry baby, feels too good." You hummed around his cock happily, causing Sanji to whine. "Baby, love, I'm not gonna last long, I promise I'm better than this."

You pulled off with a lewd pop, cooking a brow at him. A hoarse voice you didn't recognise as your own regarded him. "Y'perfect. Now calm down and cum in my mouth, can fuck me some other day."

Sanji whimpered as you resumed your ministrations, scrunching his eyes shut. Fuck, the pleasure was too much. He couldn't stop the way he lightly rocked his hips. He was so close. So close.

BZZZZZZZ

Ohoho. There was no way you'd forgotten what he'd agreed to. You firmly held the vibrating bullet against the back of his balls, resting on his perineum. Electricity coiled inside him, balls growing tight. Sanji honestly keened, a high whine escaping him. Oh shit that was...

Fuck. Too Much.

"(Name), I'm, oh fuck-"

Sanji tried to pry you off, embarrassed at the thought of cumming in your mouth. You growled around him, swallowing around him. Sanji moaned, hips delivering a final stutter.

He came. Hot seed spilling into your mouth and down your throat. Sanji's whole body shook. You gently licked at him, milking him through his orgasm. When you deemed the man thoroughly spent, you removed the bullet and pulled him out of your mouth. Sanji looked at you with frantic eyes.

"Spit that out!" He hissed, afraid to be heard. This was embarrassing. He hadn't even touched you yet, and here he was, trying to get you to get rid of his cum. Sanji felt himself grow light headed as he watched you swallow, your throat bobbing with the movement.

"You know we don't waste food Sanji. And how could I turn down such a treat?" You laughed, voice raspy. 

Sanji whined. How dare you use his words against him! He felt awkward. You pulled his underwear back up, patting his hip. 

"Lemme touch you!" He pleaded. You laughed. "No, really. Let me eat you out!"

You flushed beautifully. "Oh. Um. I don't think you want to do that!"

Sanji huffed. "I do! You're not gonna use that stupid toy, sit on my face, please darling." 

You squeaked. "No! I'm not gonna sit on your f-face! And it's not stupid. Made you cum."

Sanji rolled his eyes, a blush high on his cheeks. "That's not hard when you're involved. Please?"

"I'm too heavy and I won't taste nice! N-no!" You scrambled to the other side of your bed while Sanji pulled his pants back up. His eyes softened.

"That's not true. I'm sure I don't taste good." He faltered when you shook your head. He tried to muster up his signature charm. "Oh, you're worried you're too addictive and I'll never leave you alone?" 

That drew a laugh from you. Sanji smiled. "C'mon love? Can I...can I finger you at least? Really wanna touch you."

Your face was glowing red, eyes shifting away from him. "Oh. Um. I suppose that's okay."

Sanji leapt off the bed. "Good! Yes! Get comfy!" He watched as you settled where he'd been, clearly feeling embarrassed. You covered your stomach with your arms. Sanji frowned. "Love... You know that won't do."

"Ah. Sanji c'mon." You pleaded.

"Uh uh. You were so confident before. C'mon lay back. Just relax, I won't bite, unless you want me to?" 

There was that cocky grin you found so endearing. With a sigh, you sunk back into the mattress, letting your hands fall to your side. When you nodded, Sanji took that as his cue. 

Fervently he scrambled onto the bed, pinning you under him. He began peppering kisses all over your face, causing you to giggle. He was acting like an overexcited puppy. You captured his lips in another searing kiss. Sanji rested a hand on your waist, causing you to gasp. Sanji greedily took advantage of this, licking his way into your mouth. You whined. You heard Sanji groan, evident he could still taste himself. 

He pulled back with a pop and you startled at the look he gave you. It was so full of love and warmth, lust evident. He gave you a wink, before he ducked down to start kissing you everywhere. Your non-existent collarbones. He sucked lightly over one of them. You squeaked. He kissed his way down your breasts, free hand groping your smple chest. Sanji grinned against your skin, pleased with the noises he was getting. He trailed both hands to your back, rubbing soothing circles. You sighed as he explored your back.

When you felt his practised fingers make quick work of your bra hooks you gasped, red faced. He pushed them out of the way, lightly clawing at your back. You felt like fainting when your strap started to fall. What if he was disgusted? Sanji felt your breath picking up. 

"Oh my dear! Don't be scared. I'll take good care of you I promise! May I see them? I dream of them! You wouldn't deprive me of such a sight?"

You smiled at how cheesy he was. With a light cough you nodded. You wanted to cry at how gentle he was treating you, hands rubbing both your arms. You began to relax. Sanji grinned, eyes wild, as he pulled the straps down your arms, He gestured to the cups, wiggling his eyebrows. You laughed, nodding. He really knew how to ease the tension. Sanji looked awestruck as he pulled your bra away, discarding it off the bed. 

"Wow."

Sanji's eyes were positively sparkling, You watched as he nodded, seemingly at nothing, face dangerously red. With shaking hands he reached up to cup your breasts. He let out a shuddering breath. You felt your weighty breasts being lifted, Sanji supporting them with a blissful smile. He bounced his hands lightly, watching as they jiggled. 

"So hot. Better than I imagined."

"Yeah?" You tried not to sound too hopeful. Sanji grinned, squeezing experimentally. A cute whine ripped its way out of your throat, head lolling to the side. He was so gentle. You felt guilty for teasing him. "I'm sorry for teasing you. You're so cute you make me wanna make you blush."

Sanji stilled. "Oh. I...I don't mind. It's kinda hot. I'll get you back, don’t worry. Right now, wanna make you feel good."

You tried to push down the butterflies when Sanji kissed your tits as his hands reached your shorts. Embarrassment overcoming you, you buried your face in your hands as he popped open a button.

"Love? We can stop if it's too much?"

"No." You whined behind your hands. "Been a long time, and you're so hot. Don't want you to be disappointed. 

"I'm flattered. You know I could never be disappointed (Name)." 

Butterflies multiplied when he spoke your name. You nodded, wincing as he played with your zipper. With a sigh, you peeked through your hands. The breath that left you was airy and shaky. 

"Okay."

Sanji shot you a dazzling grin. "Then hips up my love!" 

You obeyed him, and watched as he dragged your shorts down, not stopping till they hung off one foot. With a shake of your foot the offending article hit the bed. Sanji gasped, cooing at you.

"Ah, your panties have little kittens on them, so cute." 

You froze, face dangerously red. Sanji watched out of the corner of his eyes as you floundered beneath him, stuttering. 

"I didn't know we were gonna...y'know? Wasn't like I wanted anyone to see 'em. It was uh....laundry day?" Your protests fell on deaf ears.

Sanji chuckled, eyes glinting dangerously. "It's cute. So cute. Can think of another pussy I'd like to see."

You swatted at him in embarrassment, he dodged you playfully. 

"I understand why you enjoy teasing me so much. Your face is so cute, love. May I?"

You nodded, not trusting your voice. Sanji grinned. Stupid cook. The object of your affection studied you, clear he was savouring this. You squirmed. Sanji rested his hands on your plush hips. 

"You're going to have to spread your legs sweetheart." Sanji bit his lip when you squeaked in response. "C'mon. Let me make you feel good."

Sanji watched, utterly enraptured as you shuffled, spreading your thighs apart. Your thighs looked so inviting, all he wanted to do was bury his face in there and lap at you like a man starving. But he'd respect your wishes, there was always next time. Eyes flicking upwards, he took into account how you weren't looking at him, eyes scrunched shut. 

You startled when Sanji crawled between your legs, hands cradling your thighs. The touch tickled and burned, sending electricity buzzing through you straight to your core. Sanji slid a hand up your inner thigh, resting at mid thigh.

"Fuck." You heard him swear, voice full of awe. "You're so wet."

A squeal escaped you and you tried slamming your thighs shut, but Sanji had caught them, staring. You cracked an eye open and gasped, thighs shaking. 

Sanji was practically drooling, biting his bottom lip. "You're SO wet..." He trailed off. You felt a hand gently hook your thigh onto his shoulder. He kissed the skin softly, relishing as you quivered under him. "Fuck. You gotta let me eat you next time."

Next Time. The thought made you lightheaded. You whined. Sanji soothed you, rubbing circles on your thigh. When you pried your eyes open you found the man staring directly in your eyes. You startled. Sanji maintained intense eye contact as you felt his knuckle run up your clothed slit. You muffled a shriek, blush returning tenfold. Sanji smiled, eyes turning back to your pussy. You shook as his fingers danced over you, pushing the fabric against you. When he caressed the area you moaned. 

"As cute as these are, can I please take them off?" Sanji pleaded playfully. 

"Please." You nodded. 

You squirmed as he began pulling your panties down, hands tickling the skin uncovered. 

"Okay baby, knees together." Sanji coached, picking your other leg up to join the one on his shoulder. You mewled at his gentleness, feeling him drag your underwear down. You tried angling your hips away from him, instead giving him a good view of your rear. "What a cute ass." He mused, continuing to trail the fabric to your feet. With nothing but gentleness, he slipped the underwear off you, balling the fabric up. 

You were too busy trying to disappear and hide your nakedness from the man, so you didn't notice how he rubbed it between his fingers before stuffing them in his pockets. He'd make sure you didn't even realise they were missing. He salivated at the thought.

In the meantime you had clamped both hands over your sex. Sanji tutted at you. That wouldn't do. With a sigh he gripped your right leg, beginning to pry them apart. You shrieked, pointing your knees inwards.

"(Name)." Sanji warned. When you didn't respond he swatted lightly at your ass. He grinned when you rewarded him with a squeal, bucking your hips away from his hand and towards him. He'd file that away. Sanji sighed. "Darling please. I'll die if you don't show me that pretty pussy. I'm trying to be gentle, but knowing what's behind those hands, I want to wrench your thighs open." 

Sanji watched you surreptitiously rub your thighs together. He cocked an eyebrow. So you were enjoying this. An over-dramatic sigh escaped him. He'd just have to deal with the consequences. Sure you could fight, but Sanji was stronger than you, and when he wrapped a hand under your thigh, thumb wrapping into the inside near your apex, you knew you were fucked. 

"Darling. You can be a good girl and show me, or I can do it for you." When you continued squirming and stuttering Sanji tsked. "Then I'm sorry (Name). You can get me back later." 

You squealed when he yanked your thighs apart, quickly slotting himself between your legs, rendering you unable to close them fully. If your face got any redder you'd faint, and it was a very likely possibility when you felt his hands circle your wrist. The switch to being more dominant was making your head spin. Sure, you adored submissive Sanji, but the idea that he was acting like this because he wanted to see you that badly ignited you. 

"Sorry my love." He apologised before wrenching your hands back. You tried desperately to slap your thighs shut, squirming in his hold. All this did was rut your sex closer to him. You heard Sanji groan, causing you to go deathly still. 

"F-fuck."

Fighting the tears in your eyes you avoided his eyes. Sanji breathed out a long sigh, the air hitting your sex. You whined. 

"Holy fuck. Gorgeous." 

You stared down at him. Sanji's eyes were glued to your pussy, pupils dilated. Anxious, you fiddled with your fingers. Sanji kept muttering praises, rubbing your thigh reassuringly. 

Shame flooded you when you felt him spread you open with two fingers. A loud squelch rewarded the man, and he clearly enjoyed it. 

"Oh fuck! Love, love, please?"

"Yeah." You breathed out. Sanji grinned up at you before turning his attention back to his prize. With his index and middle finger he parted your labia back open, whining at the wetness that greeted him. He gently prodded you with his thumb, causing you to jump and whine. 

Sanji acted like a man possessed, thumb rubbing circles, gathering up your juices. He ground his thumb against your clit, causing you to moan and squirm against him. He pivoted his hand position so just his thumb was on you, rubbing sweet circles on the nub. Your body was abuzz with pleasure, clit throbbing.

"Here we go, my love. Tell me if you don't like it." His honeyed voice kissed your ears. All you could muster was an eager nod.

Thumb still stimulating your clitoris, you felt his pointer circle your opening. Pleasure overtook you, helping abate some of your nerves. The long digit dipped into you and you squeaked. Sanji took this as a good sign, and he slowly sunk the finger inside you, curling up at the end. When you big out a low moan Sanji knew that was the spot. He rubbed the rough spot gently, causing tears to spring to your eyes. 

Sanji's movements grew clumsy, causing you to stare down at him. The sight that greeted you caused you to choke back a laugh. Sanji growled, crooking his finger and making you whine. 

Sanji was deep in you with one hand, the other was struggling with your vibrator.

"How do you even turn this thing on?" He growled, grinding his thumb a little hard when you giggled. 

"Twist the base. No, no the other way...There you go!"

Sanji withdrew his other hand, causing you to mourn the loss. He grinned up at you. "Here we go darling!"

You blushed as he spread you open again, hearing him sigh in awe. You bit back a moan when he pressed the vibrator against your clit. Sanji grinned at how you shook. With a cheeky smirk, he plunged a finger inside you, pumping in and out at a gentle rhythm. When you began squirming, Sanji took that as a sign to add another finger, making sure to crook them just right.

Sanji took you in. You were panting, moaning freely as he pleasured you. He watched mesmerised at how your chest heaved, your hands playing with your nipples, a hiss tearing from his throat. That was hot. He became more desperate to make you cum. 

The vibrator cranked up in power, causing you to moan wantonly. Sanji crumpled himself against you, hand pumping furiously. The vibrator was firmly dancing against your clit. With his free hand Sanji slapped one of your hands away. You wanted to protest, but then he began sucking harshly at your tit. A whine echoed through the room when he bit down on the skin. 

Your moans pitched up in tone and frequency as you reached your end. Sanji stared up at you, in awe of your reactions. He felt your thighs quiver, a wave of giddiness washing over him. He could do this all day if it meant you'd react like that. He resumed sucking and nibbling at your breasts, his ego inflating at the way you chanted his name. He liked this version of you, too caught up in pleasure to worry about how you looked, or how you sounded. Even if it drove him wild, he really loved when you were confident.

"There we go my love. Let go. So hot."

You had tears in your eyes, your hips rocking in time with his thrusts. "Oh Sanji...you're so good to me. Good boy." Your voice hitched at a particularly hard bite. "Oh! I-I'm gonna cum b-baby."

Sanji whined against your sweaty skin. "Cum for me (name), please love."

Stars burst behind your eyes as you reached your white hot peak. You clenched around his fingers, walls spasming. Sanji marvelled at how you threw your head back, brows knitted together. Your fingers clawed for purchase, one settling in his locks, the other scratching at his neck. Sanji groaned. You uttered a stuttered call of his name. Sanji felt his mouth go dry as you came, wet squelches reaching his ears, and watching as your back arched beautifully.

You fell back into the bed, completely spent. Sanji fumbled with the vibrator, throwing it aside when he couldn't turn it off, simultaneously removing his fingers gently, eyes blown wide at the cum decorating his digits. He couldn't stop himself, trying to sneakily guide his fingers to his mouth. You watched, mesmerised as he began licking the digits clean, humming in delight. A gasp tore its way from your throat. Sanji froze, fingers in his mouth.

"M'sorry." He mumbled around his fingers. "Really wanted to taste you."

"And?" You breathed out, eyes wide and inquisitive.

Sanji sucked them clean, then pulled the fingers from his mouth with a wet pop. You cringed at the lewd sound. "Oh love, it's exquisite."

He climbed his way on top of you, collapsing against your chest with a huff, earning a giggle from you. You placed a kiss into his hair. Sanji snuggled deeper, trying to crush you in a hug. Happily, you felt him shiver as you drew circles on his bare back. The small grunt he made causing a languid grin to spread across your face.

"Was that okay?" The tentative voice you spoke with sounded foreign to you. Sanji laughed, kissing your skin.

"More than okay. Would you let me make love to you when I'm hard again?"

Sanji preened at the delighted sound that rewarded him. "I would love that." You paused. "Hey Sanji?" 

The tired man hummed, feeling you fiddle with his hair with one hand, the other splayed on his back. You were silent. He tilted his head up, peering up at you through heavy lashes. Your eyes were big and nervous.

"I kinda...like you, you know? Like...love you."

You felt the breath knocked from your lungs at the dazzling grin that spread across his face. He pushed himself up, pulling his body upwards so he could meet your eyes. 

"Yeah?" He breathed. You nodded. Sanji captured you in another kiss. "Love you too my sweet." You grinned, causing the man above you to kiss you repeatedly. You pulled back cheekily.

"Even liked the vibrator?" Sanji scowled but nodded faintly. You giggled, dropping your voice low. "You know you can get one that goes around your cock? Stops you from cumming without permission."

A soft whine ripped from Sanji's throat as he stilled, burying his face in your neck. You raised a brow.

"Are you fucking hard again?"

"Sorry darling."

[spirantization]

"Wild Blue Yonder" dealt with some of the emotional fallout of the Flux, so I want to rewind a bit and look at what that means for the Doctor.

I know that the Timeless Child and the Flux are contentious topics. I'm not here to argue either way. But now those storylines have decisively not been retconned, and with both of these fresh in my memory, I feel the need to offer some context for anyone who may not have seen it, and to recontextualize it for myself and anyone who has.

NotDonna: You don't know where you're from. The Doctor: How do you know that? How does anyone know? How does Donna know?

In "The Timeless Children", we find out that the Doctor was discovered as a child alone under a wormhole, and adopted by a woman named Tecteun. There was an accident where the Doctor fell from a cliff and regenerated, and subsequently Tecteun performed "experiments" on them to try to understand regeneration. The show minces words about this but she killed a child a whole bunch of times is what happened. Her experiments created the Time Lords and allow them to engineer their regeneration properties. The Doctor has no memory of any of this, and only finds out via the Master and information stored in the Time Lord Matrix.

The Doctor, predictably, doesn't tell anyone about this revelation. She makes a speech to the Master about how this makes her more, we get a single shot of her looking a bit tired in the TARDIS, then she immediately gets thrown in prison.

Ultimately, the Doctor doesn't know where they're from or who their parents are. And the very fact that they're not from Gallifrey is information that no one in the universe should have. Everyone who knew is now dead.

NotDonna: I saw it in your head. The Flux. The Doctor: It destroyed half the universe because of me. We stand here now, on the edge of creation, a creation which I devastated, so yes I keep running, of course I do! How am I supposed to look back on that? NotDonna: It wasn't your fault! The Doctor: I know!

A fun fact about the Flux is that the Doctor did not cause it. So why does he blame himself? Because the person who caused the Flux was Tecteun.

The reason why Tecteun wanted to destroy the universe is because the Doctor interfered with things too much. Too much morality. Too inspirational to people. She calls them a virus. So her solution to the problem of the Doctor is to destroy the universe, with the Doctor inside, and take her ship to a different universe to start fresh. She also was the one to steal all the Doctor's memories of previous lives in the first place. She's dismissive and patronizing and clearly does not care about the Doctor on an emotional level at all. Tecteun is a piece of work, and the implications of her actions and how they've shaped the Doctor have the potential to go deep.

Thirteen doesn't get too much of a chance to react to any of this, because there is plot going on. And shortly after they reunite, Tecteun gets killed by a different villain. So there was no emotional closure in the moment, and there's now no possibility for the Doctor to make sense of her actions. The Doctor does not tell any of her friends about any of these events. She keeps promising to tell Yaz but does not.

"Wild Blue Yonder" is the first time we, as the audience, hear the Doctor discuss the Flux. And their perception of events is skewed at best. The Flux wasn't caused because the Doctor made a mistake and a lot of people were killed, which is what you can argue for many other situations. The Flux and the devastation of the universe was caused by their mother, who promptly turned around and told them it was their fault for being such an interfering nuisance. We know that the Doctor is often an unreliable narrator, but this is beyond that. These are the words of an abused child who has internalized the narrative that the abuse was their fault.

So the Doctor being able to talk about this with Donna, who has seen what happened, who knows him, and tells him that it's not his fault — it means so much to him. He wants it to be her so badly. And then NotDonna laughs in his face. You can see the devastation. He thinks for one moment that he can finally talk about this with his best friend, and it's snatched away from him. He gives himself a moment to break down in the corridor, and then you can see the walls rebuilding as he suppresses it all again.

At the very end of the episode, back in the TARDIS, he's trying very very hard to be nonchalant. I'm curious. The NotDonna could remember all these things that happened to me while we were apart. Can you? Just wondering. Things happened, but I'll be fine. In a million years. It's not a joke.

He wants so badly to be able to talk about this. You can see it in all the lines of his body language. He's keeping himself together but is prepared to fall apart in an instant. He doesn't want to actually tell anyone, but if Donna just magically knew already, and could tell him it wasn't his fault — well, that would make the world of difference. But she doesn't know, and he can't bring himself to tell her. And so the cycle continues.

[itsaship-literally]

It’s A Ship - Literally Revisited

As many of my long-time followers and friends know…

THIS BLOG supports the POTENTIAL FUTURE of Beetlejuice and Lydia.

In the past, I have written posts about WHY we ship Beej and Lyds, specifically here on this blog, when there are so many controversies. It needed to be cleared up many times because, with every new piece of media, there comes opposition, which is totally understandable if you are not used to supernatural or horror-themed romance tropes.

I am here to help break it down for all the new fans sitting back and trying to figure out the ship's where, what, why and whens.

Here we go!

Movie verse:

Many of us were young when we met Beetlejuice and Lydia for the first time. Some latched on to and related to a young Winona Ryder. It was a vibe, and while we are well aware that in real-life terms, a teen is not ready to be involved with a 600+ ghost (cuz that’s an option 🤣), we couldn't help but find the allure in the Living Meets Death dichotomy. As you will undoubtedly see, this is a running theme in the fandom.

We had countless reunion fics featuring an older Lydia (sometimes by years, sometimes by months) reconnecting with her villain/antagonist. Many were dark fic, some light and fluffy and some off the wall chaotic, while some crossed over into the MoToon verse (yes that is a thing)

So here we are, more than 30 years later, and our pair reunited legitimately on the big screen. It was beautiful and, without giving away any spoilers since this new piece of media is still fresh, it gives us more to play with because, let’s face it, he is not done haunting her.

With this movie universe, there is still potential for this ship to thrive. (And that’s not just because Winona and Michael are down. I still am in shock over their revelations)

Toon Verse:

Yet another oldie that many grew up on. This one is a hotbed for both friend-shipping and Relation-shipping.

Here, we have a long-term bond that can be wholesome, platonic, romantic, complicated, or, on occasion, dark and twisted.

Stories have ranged from childhood crushes to outright possessiveness. The fanart from cute fluff to… well… rule 34.

Lydia is young in this cartoon. We are aware of that and in any cartoon fandom, aging up is par for the course. It is expected (and preferred by many) that any stories of romance happen in circumstances outside of the toon cannon.

Age issues aside, we cannot deny that BJ adores her. The man has an entire shrine in his head, idolizing this twisted, weird girl that, once again, many older fans related to. He would do anything for her and has proved it many times. The chaotic dead man with no shits to give will give up freedom and wealth and go against his nature to make her happy.

How can we not find the potential for a future of these two goofballs?

Musical Verse:

This universe combined the goofiness of Toon with the antagonism of the movie—a nice combo that I and those we call MusicalBabes enjoy.

Regardless of what the cast believes or feels about the shipping subject, they are working with a pair of unseen, attention-starved, chaotic nut jobs—a compliment, not disparagement.

Beetlejuice and Lydia need each other. They were miserable before they met and would have continued to be so had they not entangled themselves in the other’s existence.

Living and the dead, once again, need each other to balance their lonliness.

Does musical verse have ship potential? Hell, yes, it does. (Also, this is the only piece of media where the wedding actually went through)

Just a few Common Tropes In This Ship: (there are so many more than this)

Mayfly/December Romance (also see: May/December and Age Gap)

Reincarnation Romance

Death and the Maiden (also see: Monster and the Maiden)

Beast and Beauty

Ugly Guy, Hot Wife

Boy meets Ghoul

Why the name Beetlebabes?

Read: Beetlebabes: A History

To find more ship related content use: Beetlejuice x Lydia, Betelyds (alt. Beetlyds), Beej and Lyds, Beetle and Babes, Beetz and Deetz (or more simply Beetz) are the original ship names. BeetleBabes, MovieBabes, ToonBabes and MusicalBabes are all relatively new.

This blog often uses Beetlebabes but it’s not a hard fast rule that it will be on every post.

The goal of Its A Ship - Literally...

I created this blog many years ago (around 2016) to collect all the goodness in the fandom. Memes, art, fics, fan theories. I picked up the ship names and used them as tags. Gathered as much as I could from Tumblr posts, in all universes, and tried so hard to stay neutral amidst the internal fandom drama. (give or take a few misteps, iykyk)

The only goal I have here is to collect and share and boost all universes. Movie, Toon and Musical, including the mini verses of MoToon and Graveyard Revue if I can find it.

I do this for fun, to destress and play internet magpie with shiny beetle stuff while I stuff everything into the queue.

Lots of love to you guys. And as always, please show love to your fan creators. Credit them and boost the signals. These creators do so much hard work.

- 🪲 - 🪲 - 🪲 - 🪲 - 🪲 -

Previous Posts Like This: Because It Needs to Be Said Yet Again (2017) | One More Time (2019)

[decepti-thots]

Sometimes I have to remind myself that a lot of people in fact have not read/skipped the prose stories in IDW, so for what it's worth, I think any discussion of pre-Overlord Drift-Rodimus dynamics needs to consider this specific scene from the post-RiL one. I am passionate enough about this I'm putting it below the cut, though I have the whole story hosted here btw. It establishes a few really important things, IMO:

What I just discussed regarding Rodimus having voluntarily brought Overlord onto the ship, against Drift's wishes

Him attempting to prevent Drift from taking the fall because he knows it's his fault, and Drift being the one to tell him no about this

The revelation Drift was keeping his motivation for putting Rodimus in charge a secret from Rodimus, which he only explains before leaving

Drift being clear he did not take the fall to help Rodimus per se, but because he considers it the necessary thing to do as per his vision, which is ultimately the most important thing to him period

That's a LOT of stuff without which the dynamic does not read at all the same way going forward, IMO. Basically any discussion of those two in s1 should really take it into consideration in terms of both sides' motivations, especially regarding Drift's motivations in keeping Rodimus content and in charge no matter what he said or did, and Rodimus' relative ignorance of said motivations.

****

As Rodimus stepped into his office he shielded his eyes—literally put his hand to his face—to avoid catching sight of the flames he’d had painted around the doorframe. As soon as he’d sorted out the current mess he’d ask Atomizer to help him redecorate. No more fire-rimmed entrances, garish pink walls or self-aggrandizing plaques: just a desk, a chair, some subdued lighting and a memorial to crewmembers killed by sparkeater, Legislator, or Overlord.

Overlord.

When his guard was down—when he wasn’t showing off or doodling or spray-painting—the name made him think of the people who had died or lost loved ones because he’d been too scared to say no to Prowl. Overlord made him think of Pipes and Rewind and Chromedome and Lockstock and Lancet, but one face—Drift’s face—kept crowding out all the others. It had been here, in his office, that they’d had their last proper conversation.

“An inquiry?” Drift stood in the doorway, looking incredulous. “An inquiry?”

Rodimus dragged him inside and locked the door. “I had to do something! People were asking questions! And what do you do if you want to stall things? You launch an inquiry.” He slumped into his chair. “An inquiry into something I’m responsible for. Oh god. Oh god, I feel sick. I’ve messed up big time.”

“I can sort this out, Rodimus. Honestly, I can fix this.”

“This is my fault, not yours. We were standing in Prowl’s office, and he was trying to convince me that bringing Overlord onboard was ‘right and proper’, and you called me an idiot for even considering it.”

“Was I that blunt?”

“I don’t know why he even let you in on those discussions in the first place. It’s not like he trusts you.”

“I’ll tell you exactly why he wanted me there: it was in case something like this happened. Need a scapegoat? Get an ex-Decepticon.”

“Well it’s not gonna happen. I’m taking the fall for this one. Your name doesn’t have to come into it. It’s taken you years to win back people’s trust, and you’re not throwing it all away on my behalf.”

“Rodimus, if you tell the crew what you’ve done, then that’s it. The quest’s over. We’ll never find the Knights.”

“No, it just means someone else will take over. You, maybe? Ratchet? I dunno. Someone.”

“But someone doesn’t take over!” Rodimus looked up sharply. “’Doesn’t’?”

“Won’t.”

“You said ‘doesn’t.’ What d’you mean, ‘doesn’t’?”

“It’s hard to explain what I mean.” Drift unclipped his Great Sword and placed it on the desk. “You remember when I nearly died, back on Cybertron? I was within feet of Vector Sigma.”

“Yes…” said Rodimus slowly, unsure where this was going.

“When I put this sword through my spark, I saw something.”

“What, like a vision?”

“Kind of. More a sense of how things would play out. It was abstract and it was fleeting, and every time I call it to mind it becomes harder to interpret, but something is around the corner, Rodimus—and a year from now, or 50 years from now, that something will arrive, and we won’t be able to stop it unless we find the Knights. And I don’t care if you think, ‘Oh, that’s just Drift being Drift,’ because I’m convinced that you need to remain in charge. People can come and go—they can die—but you have to be here, otherwise we will fail. And so the simple solution—the only solution—is that I take the blame for this.”

“I won’t let you do this for me.”

“I’m not doing it for you. I’m doing it for everyone else.”

[ingo-ingoing-ingone]

A Personal Post

Hi guys, I'm finally making the post I kept telling myself and my best friends I'd make but wanted to put it off until I felt better. That hasn't happened and with how things are going I thought it was best to just post it now.

So for a while, since probably late 2023, I've felt less like my blog is for me, and more like it's some kind of fandom archive. Which, if you use it this way as-is, great! I'm glad my blog could make you happy like that! But that's not what I set out for it to be.

I'm the sort of neurodivergent person who likes to categorize things, including my interests. All my tumblr blogs are specific to one thing, and this one was no exception.

I began tagging things soon after I made the blog because I saw a lot of people were sad about the twins, and I thought "well since I love both sad and happy stuff, and I'm really good about categorizing things, maybe I can try and help!" And according to many, it did help!

But I think that also gave off the impression that I was making this blog for other folks, and that isn't the case. I'm sorry I never clarified. It's not an archive; I do not reblog shipping posts, posts from people I've blocked, AUs I don't click with, and sometimes just not everything I see.

I've gotten popular in the fandom, and for the most part I do, from the bottom of my heart, enjoy it. I have people who care about my hyperfixation! That's amazing! I have people who love my cosplay and want to meet up with me. I've made so many friends of all shapes and sizes and it's probably the most incredible thing I've ever experienced, truth be told.

But yeah my blog being mine has gotten away from me a bit, I think.

I want to keep tagging my submas tags, that isn't going to change. I will tag triggers when asked, unless it's kind of impossible due to the blog's subject (trains, for instance) or a name or really common word (like the word 'head' or something). Other than that please reach out and I'll do my best to remember. But other tags? Those will be up to me. I don't want to tag when OCs show up. I love OCs and like seeing them, and don't want to have to remember that one person who visits my blog doesn't.

I had anon off for a while because honestly ever since making this blog, there have been anons who really made me unhappy. (Also yes, non-anons but that's been fewer and far between). I've gotten misinformation, accusations, horrible and disgusting explicit asks, and criticisms and complaints, and I'm just... Not here for that. Keep the explicit things and misinfo out of my inbox, I am no arbiter of morality or personal decisions, and I am not here for you to share your negative opinions of submas or the fandom.

Anon is on for people who are too self conscious to chat face to face, for people to send fun headcanon ideas (remember when people did that back in 2022 when this blog started? I miss that, it was sweet and wholesome), to share song recommendations... That kind of stuff. If you have an actual problem, please, PLEASE talk to me off anon, whether that be DMs or a non-anon ask that I can answer privately. Especially if we're friends; please, please just talk to me about stuff. I don't bite! I swear!

But yeah the bottom line is I'm here to participate in fun (and sometimes heartbreaking!) fandom stuff. I'm here for FUN, not as my job. I know that we're all a bunch of neurodivergent folks and sometimes interactions can be a swing and a miss, but please try to be mindful. Please treat me like a person and not just like a museum curator for this blog.

Truth is, I haven't been okay for a while now. It's gotten worse this year for sure, and due to life stuff I cannot see things feeling better for me for some time. I need to go day by day for a lot of things, and I am trying to get better about needing to set boundaries and all that sort of thing. I suffer from intense paranoia too, and having so many eyes on me is genuinely terrifying at times. I'm trying to manage that as best I can, but I do ask that folks be kind.

NO I am not going anywhere, my blog is staying and will continue on as normal, but I really, really needed to get this posted.

Please continue to interact with me and chat and everything like that! But also please remember to treat this space, my blog, as my space. Thanks for reading!

[annabelle-creart]

TF KINKTOBER DAY #1: Exhibiscionism || Filming/Photographing

CW: Valvepluge. Sexcall. Videocall. Masturbation.

Ship: BumbleBlades

Au: Shattered Glass

"Pff- HAHAHA!" Blades voice resonated on all the place, disturbing a bit the audio, it was like those crying toys Blades showed him before "For Unicron's sake! Bee, You're so funny!" Fortunately the ship was alone today, so no one would distract the bot from his call with his 'cutsie'

"Ah, it's just some things big OP tell me to do, nothing from other world" Goldbug boasted, shifting his legs on his chair for comfort, usually, when Gold says those kind of things, bots feel disgusted, but (still not sure if it's a blessing or a curse) Blades only feels admiration and delightment each time Gold tell him about his "adventures", he was so trustful with him that he wasn't scared or shameful of calling him by his old name, and Bee never said anything about it

"You know" Blades calmed the tone, getting closer to the screen, "that excites me"

"Pff, am I rizzing you up?"

"Yes, you do"

"I'm not even trying!" Gold started to laugh, hiding his face with his servo, but Blades was already looking deeply on his optics, supporting his head with one servo, when Gold looked a little bit down, he saw Blades' other servo too close to his clutch, enough to actually think what Blades means "I'm glad is so easy for me to high your day"

"You do it all the time" Blades lowered again the tune, now more playful, his orange optics placed on Gold's frame

"You look like you want to play something"

"Not 'play', but yes, I would like to"

It was obvious, the call always sends a notification when the other starts recording the video, but it was not the first time and Blades didn't care for it, actually, he liked it too much.

Bee openeded his legs, letting see his clutch, his panel wasn't opened yet but his optics tell everything. Blades was more of play pretend first, hiding a bit was his fave part, he opened his legs and his panel was open, but didn't showed to the camera, only his wrist going up and down was viewable for Bee

"Oh, come on!" Bee begged for Blades, knowing it wouldn't work, but Blades liked that Bee beg for him, to convice Blades was their favorite part "let me see a bit"

"No" Blades joked, but did so, he raised one leg only to let Bee know he had to beg a little more "I'm not hearing you"

"Why do I always have to beg you?" Gold rolled his optics but kept a mischevious smile, and got closer to the camera as if he could see more by it "please..."

"I don't see you properly" Blades laughed a bit, feeling his cold digit agasinst his valve, Gold understood the indirect, so, he moved the camera, enough for Blades to see his face but he could also see his clutch properly

"Hm, how I miss it" Blades passed his own digit around his chin, licking some, remembering how he played with Bee's spike back on Cybertron

"I miss your mouth on it too" both chuckled, at the same time, reminiscing those moments with both fun and pleasure

"You just want a cock warmer"

"I don't remember pushing your neck to me" Bee replied Blades' joke "But I do remember you get out of my spike only to eat it whole" Bee had one servo on his spike, caressing it with his digits, Blades could see it, figuring the way Bee caressed himself was pretty similar to how Blades remembered he did "and I remember you were really good at it"

"I'm sure I still am, I'm just out of practice" Blades moved again to have his valve more on the view, finally Bee could see more of it, and Blades was already wet "But I also remember you never let me go even after you had an overload, I remember I once thought you wanted more, and then you said your frame was cold!"

"Please, let's make like that never happened" Bee's breath changed, it was a bit more fast now, feeling like a goosebump on his clutch

"I can't" Blades breath was also different, maybe to see Bee like that excited him more "it was so cute!"

"It was stupid"

"No... it was hot" Blades reclined his head on the chair, his valve felt like bumping and his digits were also full of transfluid, Bee could see it, wishing to be with Blades, to handle his hips, to do jugling with his glossa and pass his digits through the wet valve, to press them inside while kissing his neck and then dip his own spike with Blades transfluids and be inside him, he wanted to be the reason of Blades' moans, which only excited him more, moving his wrist through his spike up and down, spitting coolant on it to make the movement easier, he wanted to be for Blades, imagining what is Blades feeling, he was moaning, inserting his digits on his valve and passing his other servo through his mouth, was he also dreaming of have inside Bee's spike or fingers, or maybe was he dreaming of a glossa instead? Bee could also think of Blades long and playful glossa on his spike, he was a terrorcon after all, that wasn't strange, and it was actually what Bee missed the most of interfacing.

"Bee?" Blades called between moans

"Hm?" Bee replied softly, wondering if it was just Blades excitement or was actually calling, never letting his servo appart

"I wish you were the one fucking me right now"

"I know"

"No, I mean" Blades was interrupted by his own frame, like a tickle and a high, his vents and motor were hot and his clutch was sensible, nothing ached but the feeling of exhaustion hit him for a moment

When Blades saw the screen, Bee was just on it, not letting go until his spike couldn't more, also with some exhaustion but also some relief, he breathed properly after a moment of relaxation

"What were you saying? Sorry" Bee retook the conversation, Blades paused a moment, this time glued on his Bee's optics

"I miss you"

[daisycassy]

I did it, I made the playlist! Also known as the list of Leonard Cohen's songs that make me go feral with Devil's minion feelings.

List of all songs along with my thoughts under the cut bellow

The Future - Give me absolute control/Over every living soul/And lie beside me, baby/That's an order/Give me crack and anal sex....

This whole song is extremely "Daniel and Armand explore their old and new dynamic after years apart" coded, with some old bitter investigative journalist Daniel (my beloved) sprinkled in

Darkness - I caught the darkness/Drinking from your cup/I said: Is this contagious?/You said: Just drink it up...

This is obviously about old Daniel being turned, what do you mean it is not? Look at it!

First we take Manhattan - Ah, you loved me as a loser, but now you're worried that I just might win/You know the way to stop me, but you don't have the discipline/How many nights I prayed for this, to let my work begin...

Vampire power couple? Vampire Daniel chasing his maker while being extremely capable fledling? Armand dreaming of them as vampire power couple in the 80s despite being terrified of turning Daniel? Yes all of those

Avalanche - You who wish to conquer pain/You must learn what makes me kind/The crumbs of love that you offer me/They're the crumbs I've left behind...

The pain, the tragedy of forgotten love then remebered and the reality of grapling with those emotions and memories. Also with the spice of the terror of these two

I'm your man - If you want a lover/I'll do anything you ask me to/And if you want another kind of love/I'll wear a mask for you/If you want a partner, take my hand, or/If you want to strike me down in anger/Here I stand/I'm your man...

Is this about Armand and his unresolved issues and tendency to mould himself into whatever he thinks his lovers need and want? Is this about Daniel wanting to be everything that Armand wants and needs? Is this about them being perfect for each other? Or all of the above? Who's to say

Lover Lover Lover - This one is so so perfect for Armand's identity issues, I feel like I want to copy the whole lyrics here

Master song - Devil's minion version 1, 70s and 80s. But also could make an argument for this to be about Armand and his feelings for Marius (I am his n.1 hater)

It seemed the better way - Sounded like the truth/But it's not the truth today/I better hold my tongue/I better take my place/Lift this glass of blood/Try to say the grace/...

Daniel who was turned by Armand to save him from dying, grapling with his newly regained memories, bitterness and anger at being turned against his will now, and abandoned in the past, but still loving Armand

Nevermind - Never mind/I had to leave my life behind/The story's told/With facts and lies/You own the world so never mind/...

Once again Devil's minion 2, old Daniel after getting turned

Almost like the Blues - But I've had the invitation/that a sinner can't refuse/It's almost like salvation/It's almost like the blues...

Daniel spending his life as a journalist, exposing lies and injustice and yet choosing to become the evil that is to be a vampire

My Oh My - Wasn't hard to love you/Didn't have to try/Held you for a little while...

Both of them. Because my favourite thing about this ship is that despite evrything the loving comes easily to them. But love on its own doesn't make relationships easy.

Leaving the table - If I ever loved you, oh no, no/It's a crying shame/If I ever loved you/If I knew your name...

Old Daniel grappling with the newly gained memories of loving Armand and what it means. At the same time not regretting becoming vampire at all. I don't need a reason/For what I becameI've got these excuses/They're tired and lame/I don't need a pardon...

It's Torn - You smile at your suffering, the sweetest reprieve/Why did you leave us? Why did you leave?...

Daniel remembering loving Armand, and the love coming back so so strong. The longing, the pining

Traveling light - I'm just a fool/A dreamer who/Forgot to dream/Of the me and you/Traveling light like/We used to do...

Vampire Daniel chasing his maker who turned him, gave him back the memories of their love and then disappeared.

Amen - Tell me again/We’re alone and I’m listening/I’m listening so hard that it hurts/Tell me again/When I’m clean and I’m sober/Tell me again/When I’ve seen through the horror/Tell me again/Tell me over and over/Tell me that you want me then...

Armand and Daniel during the 70s and 80s both not believing that the other genuinely loves them. The tragedy it leads them to. The endless pining

I can't forget - I said this can't be me/Must be my double/And I can't forget, I can't forget/I can't forget but I don't remember what...

Daniel left without his memories and yet remembering something, sometimes, in his dreams , in the corner of his eye. Forgetting and yet unable to forget.

Take this longing - Oh, take this longing from my tongue/Whatever useless things these hands have done/Let me see your beauty broken down...

As it says on the tin, take this longing from these men, they are sooo full of it.

[writingbyshiloh]

Cautious Yet Optimistic and Graceful Part 3 (20/7 new ending)

PART 3 (edited with new ending)!!!! (part 1 and part 2)

CW: FEM!Reader, Morally gray Reader, JW universe, Beer, gambling, food, Killa appearance, kissing, soft(er) Vincent, mutual pinning, no beta, Possibly OOC Vincent, we never see him flirt in the film unless you count the stuff w Mr. Nobody, Suggestive content, confessions of feelings

Summary: The Marquis du Gramont invites you over for a thank-you dinner. You try to stay sane. 

AN: Link to the poem here!!!! TBH I like the second translation of the poem more but that's just me. (the poem has 1 physical descriptor but I just ignored that). Added more to the ending which I think sums it up better! TY to those that chimed in on how to add the ending

You wouldn’t know what to expect when he handed you the letter, let alone the fact that you almost kissed him but ended up with a burn. 

Holding your hand under running water you examine the letter more. The gold wax seal bears his coat of arms but the envelope is made of thick white paper, meaning you can’t see any words through the envelope. It’s flattering that he wrote your full name. 

It’s a dinner invitation. He wants (maybe not anymore) to have you over to his home as a thank-you for your help the other night. You immediately RSVP yes to the number he included as if he's going to yank the offer out from under you. Knowing him, he might.

You don’t get to spend much time obsessing over the dinner, normal work challenges and fires that you have to put out, memorizing new names and faces to the scene, shipping some markers back to New York. 

It's a relief when Killa calls you to tell you he's going to be in Paris for a few days. You spent a few years working under Killa, you feel that's where you gained some of your reputation. 

Killa suggested the bar. It's a nice change of pace, to be in a bar where people can kill each other. It's a big fear of yours, that someone ignores the rules and decides to kill while on your property. Here, people almost expect it. The bar is dark and smokey, but drinks are relatively cheap. Plus your reputation exceeds you, meaning no one is trying to chat you up. 

You rest your chin on your hand, and elbow on the sticky table. You see Killa at the bar, getting two more beers. 

You jump at the warm hand on your shoulder, your body jerking around before stopping at the soft voice behind you. 

“Mademoiselle.”

“Marquis de Gramont,” you reply. You haven’t seen him since the almost kiss, and you still had a few days before going to his mansion. You had started to mentally prepare for the dinner, but this caught you off guard. “This doesn’t seem like your usual company.” 

He cranes his head to observe the crowd scattered out at tables and the bar. You follow his gaze and see a few of his guards behind you. You twist back to your original sitting position and find him looking at you. 

“I’m excited about the dinner. Did you want me to bring anything?”

His eye catches Killa's frame, dressed in a purple suit at the bar, getting the new round of drinks. 

“You're here with Killa.” He deduces. He's more observant than you always think. 

“Yeah. He’s like a mentor to me.” You say affectionately.

“He was the one to suggest you for the manager job.” You can’t help but stare at Vincent, surprise on your face. “I know you think I did, but I thought you were ill-suited.” 

You can't describe your emotions. Crushed that your crush said he didn't want you for the job you're in? Glad that Killa thinks so highly of you? You decide to tease him to cover up your wounded ego. 

Nudging your shoe against his you ask “Is that why you invited me over? To tell me how bad I am at my job?” 

“Cleary, I don’t hold the same position. Paris would not be the same without you.” 

Your brain freezes for the third time. The gentle tone tells you that he probably means it to be affectionate.

You both turn to the table as Killa sets down two steins on the table, saving you from replying. You pull your close to your seat while Killa and the Marquis shake hands. You briefly wonder how much the gold on their fingers is worth when combined. 

It makes sense that they know each other, both are the High Table representatives for their country, but you never put it together. 

“Sit, please. Enjoy a game with us, ja?” Killa asks, reaching into a suit pocket for cards.

You balk at his suggestion. “No poker. It took me ages to work off my debt from the last game.” 

You can see Killa's four gold teeth as he grins at the Marquis. 

“Please excuse me. I have business to attend to. Killa, Mademoiselle.” Vincent says. You watch him disappear into the crowd. 

On the day of the dinner, you get ready early, probably a bit too early but you need to make sure there is not a hair out of place. Even if he thinks you rejected him during the cigarette you shared, you don't see him having any interest if you reject him twice. 

You need to make sure that you are ready for anything. Your most preferred situation would be ending up in his bed, finally having something positive come from the crush you’ve been nursing. If things went badly, you can always try to avoid him. The city was large, plus you could always let Camille deal with him. 

Even though he told you not to bring anything you still got him something. Obsessive googling of what to give as a host gift to a rich person, as well as just asking some people you chat with in your hotel gave you an idea. 

You got him lilies, seven of them to be exact. Some websites advised against gifts that make the host work to put them away but someone who had a friend who worked for him assured you that he has a dozen household staff who would take care of that. 

His hand is warm between your shoulder blades as he guides you into his dining room. You try not to stare at the emperor-style around you. Everything is large, gold, and expensive. 

The table is set for two, with shiny silverware marking your seats. You’re on edge, trying to figure out if this is a date under the cover of a thank-you dinner, or just that. A dinner thanking you for doing your job. 

He pulls out your chair for you and waits for you to sit before going over to his 

“How are you?” he asks while waiting for the food to be served. The table is long, but you sit on opposite sides of the length so you can speak easily to each other. 

You shrug, before remembering your manners. 

“I’m fine, I'm just struggling to find,” you pause, moving your hand around as if you could grab the words from the air,” some aesthetic to sum up Paris for the hotel.” 

“City of lights, city of love, art, culture, food…” The examples roll off his tongue, clearly showing off what he knows about his home. 

“That's why they filmed The Bad Touch video here.” you reply without thinking.

You can tell you have his interest even if he won't say it. You pray he thinks it's funny and that you’re not an idiot.

“The video has shots of the Eiffel Tower and Champ de Mars in the background.” you elaborate as if that would make your point smarter. 

The corner of his mouth twitches in amusement as he makes a small sound of amusement. 

“I have a book that will help you. Remind me after our dinner. How is your hotel?” He takes a sip of his wine. 

“Amazing, as usual. We have a mafia man staying for the week, he booked two rooms. One for him and his wife, the other for his mistress! On different floors, of course.” 

This made him laugh, finally allowing for a comfortable conversation to start to flow. 

His library is gorgeous. As with him and everything in his home, it's grand and highly decorated in hues of gold. Books are arranged neatly on shelves around the room, and a few scattered chairs and tables for reading or taking notes. It looks like it's hardly used, or just kept in very pristine condition. 

His excitement was obvious in the way he held himself, his hands not inside his pockets, but instead held tightly by his arms. He scans his bookshelves on a mission, ready to find you a specific book. You take in the titles at a more leisurely pace, looking for something you may have read.

The Marquis makes a noise of excitement, long legs carrying him over to where you are still looking at fiction. 

“Les Fleurs du Mal. I think you will find it helpful,” he says, placing a thick hardcover in your outstretched hand. 

You run a finger of your free hand over the cover, the title and the image of a flower embossed in gold on the hardcover.

“It’s a bilingual version. You can keep it.” 

Now he's giving you gifts, you think. If he does see you as a friend it must be a good one

“This is,” you pause to search for a word. A pity gift? Flirting? “Very kind” you finish. 

He hums and steps closer until his chest rests against your back while he gently takes the book out of your hands, leafing through the poems until he sees the one he wants. 

You feel like you're going to combust. All you can smell is his cologne and feel him. You pray he didn't notice how your breath hitched as his arm brushed yours to get the book. 

Vincent holds the page open in front of you. It's lowered to your height, but he can still see over your shoulder. You can't help but stare as his nimble fingers flick through the pages. 

“The introduction explains the industrialization of Paris. The rest are poems. Some were banned for immorality when first published.” His voice is quiet, not needing to be loud given how close his lips are to your ear. 

You glance down, thankful to have something to focus on other than how close he is to you and how badly you want him. One page has the original French version, Ciel Brouillé and its sister page has an English translation, Cloudy Sky. It's just four stanzas. You can get through this without making a fool of yourself. It's a short poem about a gray day. 

Until it's not. He reads the French version slowly as if he wants to savor the words. The English translation is making your face hot, as the poem describes a seductive but harsh woman, and what it would be like to be intimate with her. 

The poem finished, he looks at your side profile, trying to judge your reaction. 

“What do you think?” he asks, voice softer since he is right at your ear. 

All you can think about is your crush. You twist in his hold, now standing face to face. His arms cage you in, and Les Fleurs du Mal now digs into your back. He's looking at you while waiting for your answer. 

“It's a poem.” you manage. 

“Yes.”

Amusement is written over his face, you could only dream of being that composed. You bring your arms to hold onto his biceps. You fucked your chance to kiss him before you’re not doing to do it again. 

You make a show of eyes flicking down to his lips and back up to meet his eyes in a silent notice of what you want. You feel his arms move under your hands then feel relief at the book no longer digging into your back. One of his hands moves to your face, giving you flashbacks about the last time you two were in a similar position. 

With nothing around to burn you, it's the right time to make the final move. You quickly press your lips to his, probably a bit more forceful than you intended. 

He pulls back slightly, using his hand to maneuver your face for a better angle.

“Finally.” he breathes into your mouth. 

You don’t know why he called you graceful over dinner all those months ago. Now you’re all excitement mixing with nerves and incredibly turned on. 

Vincent is more smooth, walking backwards with his hands pulling you by your hips. He's telling you how pretty you look, and how much he likes your perfume while settling into the plush couch. He pulls you down so your legs are bracketing his. Each complement makes your face burn hot. 

Resting all your weight on your knees you hesitate to fully sit in this lap. As badly as you want this, you don’t think that you could put your heart back together if this was a one-time thing. 

“Vincent, I uh” you elect to use his first name not his title. “I can’t do this if it's a one-time thing.” 

He brings a hand to your face, moving your chin so you’re looking into his eyes. 

“Cherie, do you know how often I visited the Continental before your management?”

You frown slightly, unsure where he is going to go with this.

“Never. I can do everything the hotel offers myself.”

His hand moves to your lower back as he sits upright to take off his suit jacket. You help as he switches hands, always have one of your lower back. You gingerly lay it over the back of the couch before resting your hands on his shoulders, having fully settled onto him. 

“Do you know how often I go to that fucking disgusting bar before you started going?” 

“Never?” you venture. 

“Once,” he admits. “But when I was younger.” 

You want to pry on what he means by that but it's not the time. 

“You’re smart. Why would I do all of this?” 

You want to have a good answer, to not seem like you’re full of yourself. From what you heard about him, he would appreciate your directness more.

“For me?” 

“Oui.” 

It's a massive boost to your ego. The most powerful man in Paris, probably all of France, says that he goes to a bar he hates just to see you.  

“What about you? Did you wear this for me, mon amour?” he asks, hand moving over your thigh. 

Your emotions are running high. Between his confession and actions, you’re more confident than normal. 

“You should see what's underneath.” 

His eyes snap to your face, delighted in your boldness. 

The Marquis hooks a finger in your shirt, pulling the collar away from your body. He peers down the front of your shirt before looking back at your face. 

“Pretty.” 

You make a mental note to reclassify how you thought he would act in a romantic context. Still a bit annoying but charming too. 

[laxibbeb]

Don’t worry, it’s truly been a week for us all. And not to flood you with asks, I just happened to have this ready at the same time as your snippet:)

I’m a fan of those Greek mythology retellings (although I haven’t finished Song of Achilles because I know how it ends and I’m scared of getting hurt). And I don’t know if you’ve ever read Gods of Jade and Shadow, but it was interesting.

Ninth House is fun, it has that mystery vibe to it while still being dark urban fantasy. Which is a genre that I don’t typically enjoy?

Also I enjoyed Too Good to be True. It was interesting trying to figure out each character’s motives throughout the book.

Have you read Priory of the Orange Tree? I loved it, but I ran into the same problem as you. I had a massive book hangover and haven’t been able to get into the second one yet 😂

I…am hesitant to tell you one of the things I’m pretentious about. I think it might give me away. I can tell you it has to do with one of my hobbies, though! For the other, I can be a bit of a snob about wine. I love a good Sauvignon Blanc. Truly immaculate. (But YES! Let’s be pretentious bitches together. That’s truly the dream. It’s also what Mor x Nesta could have been but anyway) haha maybe I’ll indulge both of us and write that someday 😊

Ooh the weaver? I see the appeal! It’s hard to pick one for ACOTAR because most of the characters are already hot. Andras, maybe? Dying for the sake of the plot? What a guy. Although I guess he’s not special in that regard, if you think about it.

I’m so sorry I just started talking😂

For non ACOTAR? I’m going to be honest I didn’t think about this either, so I’m doing the same as you. Uh, this is definitely a popular one, but that one fish from finding Nemo. Gill, I think his name is.

I can verify I am not one of the two people in the fandom who can understand that reference. Unsure if that narrows anything down for you (so I’m going to narrow it down even further and tell you I’m American)

I feel like these asks keep getting longer and longer. I don’t know what that says about us.

Anyways!

Do you have any favorite fics? They could be for any ship, honestly. I also enjoy Nessian and sometimes Feysand, and am open to other ones too.

Do you play any instruments? (I don’t think I asked this already?)

santa ❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥 i hope you flood me with asks, i love them

oH MY GOD i do that too, where i leave a book when i know it'll get bad 🫢 i'm scared to proceed with other books form "The Poppy War" for an example, because i have a vague idea of what will happen and i just. i just can't i've not read "Ninth House", i wanted to but not gonna lie, i'm scared i won't like it.. leigh bardugo hasn't ever done it for me before

i wanted to give something new of hers a try, though! so maybe?

"Too good to be true" is actually going on my tbr now, especially since i promised myself i'd read more thrillers (and haven't but shhh)

i HAVE read priory, (i have like, 80 pages left, but i'm GETTING TO IT so let's say i read it for a moment) it was so good! but yeah, the second one is gong to have to wait

(i would absolutely read an 800 page long, day to day account of tané's life, though)

---

OKAY, a wine snob??? that's so classy and sophisticated of you, santa (might i say - hot) i'll wait for your other pretentious thing, that's ok see! you see the mor x nesta potential for what it really is... divine and so, so sexy if you ever decide to write mor x nesta i'll owe you my firstborn, actually

---

OH MY GOD, THE ANDRAS SHADE (i wish the most important man in the acotar series had a single speaking line, not gonna lie)

okay, here's the thing - i've watched nemo one time and, stupid me i thought that was it, so i deleted all the memories i had of this movie. little did i know people would be referencing it for the rest of time i googled gill the fish from finding nemo and you know what? i GET IT. it's his slutty fin swoop

---

you know what, if you said that you recognized what i was talking about, only then would i have IMMEDIATELY known who you are

i now have 3 pieces of information that could possibly help me in figuring out your identity, and let me tell you, it doesn't narrow it down that much 🤣 so you're in the clear

---

I BRING FORTH MY FAVOURITE FANFICTION:

i cannot have a favourite fics list without mentioning @separatist-apologist, as she's the reason why i'm even in this fandom to begin with, so even though we all know this already -> take your pick and it's my favourite ever

what lips my lips have kissed, and where, and why by @foundress0fnothing THIS ONE IS SO MUCH FUN, and it has bi lucien; what more could you want

Springtide by @clarafae i've been really enjoying this one and i'm not done with it yet but it belongs here, ok i did not think i could like high lady of spring!elain but turns out i just needed a good fic

also, i've started A Blaze in the Dark by the famous @the-lonelybarricade and i can already tell you it belongs here as well

lately i've been reading a lot of azris, actually!

Just Enough Light to Cast Shadows by @jules-writes-stories (if you're reading this because ot the tag, jules please know i haven't forgotten about you, I'LL COME BACK) anyway, i love this one and i've been having so much fun reading it

i'm due a reread of Kerosene by @chunkypossum which is my absolute favourite and changed my life, actually

AND there are so many more but i need to finish replying to you before i turn 80 years old, unfortunately

---

i do not play an instrument :(( i used to really want to play the violin when i was a kid but when i asked my mom if i could attend music school she got war flashbacks and said she wouldn't put me through that (she also said i have no predispositions for doing music, which wow, thanks mom (she was right) 😋) so no instruments for baby laxi but i like to sing in my car when i'm driving 🤣

---

we're writing love letters to one another from across the sea and as the time passes they get progressively longer we just need to embrace it

it got to the point when i'm putting dividers whenever i change the topic to make it easier to read 🤣

as always, santa tell me your answers too, please!! and have a

[apocalyp-tech-a]

SOMEWHERE OVER THE RAINBOW 🌈 (TechxReader)

Hello! This is my Bad Batch XReader Exchange gift for @deezlees for the @cloneficgiftexchange run by @ghostofskywalker!!! 💜

Prompts: Learning to ride a horse || Going on a vacation together || His first time at a history museum || Confident reader persona

Words: 2500

Warnings: None except flirtation maybe

Ao3 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/55173340

A/N: Having background in public history and having already written Tech at museums, this was a perfect matching!!! Hope you enjoy it! 🤓 And thank you to @cloneficgiftexchange for running it!

SOMEWHERE OVER THE RAINBOW 🌈 (Tech X Reader)

The sun shone through the early morning commute of speeders and ships traversing Coruscant's sky, its pale blue color muted by smog that even the planet's filtering system could not alleviate. Towering skyscrapers of grays in every hue passed by as you navigated to the Grand Army of the Republic's base.

Upon pulling up in your speeder, a bright millaflower red Mustang XD38, you saw your future passenger salute you by casually flicking three fingers from his brow. You brought the speeder to a stop and flirted. "Hey good looking. Looking for a ride?"

"That depends," he said as he hopped into the passenger side with one dexterous and confident move.

"Depends on what, Tech?" You raised an eyebrow at him.

"On if I can be the driver." He adjusted his goggles hopefully.

"Can I pilot the Marauder?"

"No."

"Then you can be my CO-pilot. Just remember, I am the Captain here." You winked at him playfully.

You revved up the engine, but it wasn't loud enough to cover Tech's large sigh of frustration. You chuckled to yourself proudly before shooting him a grinning glance. "Aw, don't be like that, maybe you can drive back."

"That is exactly what you said on our previous two outings." Tech held up a pointed finger in a very casual, yet disgruntled manner.

"Yes. Hence the word "maybe."

Tech's propensity for arguing about who was driving dissipated as the museum came into view. His eyes were wide with excitement, though you knew he was trying to keep that emotion at bay. You had seen him go on one of his excited know-it-all rants before. You found them amusing, endearing, and most of all impressive. He was the smartest person you knew, whether it was from Kaminoan meddling or not, didn't matter.  You loved listening to him, and he loved to talk. And you didn't just like listening to him because of the pleasing sound of his voice and looks, but because he actually did talk about things that were interesting. 

After parking, you both walked to the museum's main entrance. Tech adjusted his goggles as his head tilted back to take in the much larger than necessary doors adorned by a full arch of sculpted marble, stone, mythological figures from all over the galaxy.

"Shall we?" You suggested with a smile.

Tech nodded in the affirmative. "After you, Madame." Tech took note of the strange face you gave him upon being called 'Madame.' Perhaps it was a little old fashioned, but he still had not figured out what else he could use in place of your name without being too forward or disrespectful. Sometimes you called him 'Hot Shot' or 'Ace' which were exceedingly better than the names his brothers called him.  

As for you, his brothers were not without suggestions. Crosshair suggested 'Doll,' Hunter suggested 'Sweetheart,' Echo suggested 'Dearest,' and Wrecker suggested 'Booboo-tooka.'  

None of those monikers were quite sufficient, however, but Tech knew a solution would eventually present itself.

Since you had already purchased tickets as a surprise for him since he had not only repaired, but upgraded and heavily modified the repulsor system for your speeder, you were able to acquire visitor badges quickly and began your mosey through the museum.

With twenty levels, there was no way you could see everything in one day let alone a few hours, but you knew Tech had marked out an itinerary on his datapad to follow at your suggestion. You knew he only had so much leave to see what most piqued his interest. Even though he wanted to see everything, you finally convinced him to whittle it down to four floors.

"Let's start with the Paleolithic and Neolithic," he said with a tweak of his goggles. He started walking toward the lifts as if he had been there before, but you knew he had simply memorized the entire museum's layout.

"Sounds good to me," you said walking beside him. As you stood in the lift, you tilted your head up to study his profile as he continued to look down at his datapad. You wanted to blame the movement of the lift tube for the slight buckling in your knees, but you knew it was all due to his handsomeness. 

Your heart pitter-pattered the moment you had seen him at 79s three months ago. You weren't one to go pick up guys at bars, but there was something unique and enticing about him. You thought little of it or him, figuring to never see him again until he came into your electronics shop in search of a capacitor.  

Apparently your knowledge of computers made an impression because he came in the next day looking for a hyper-regulator. With fate on your side, you asked if he wanted to meet you for a drink and after some adorable awkwardness, he agreed.

The lift doors slid open and you stepped into a carefully curated world of wood and stone. Dioramas with the first humans, the first Trandoshans, the first Rodians, Twi'leks, and Pantorans were set up along one corridor.  

"It is fascinating, the similarities between different species as pertains to the genesis and evolution of technology," Tech marveled as you came to the exhibit of like tools from all over the galaxy. "The Twi'lek arrowhead is quite similar to the Devaronian and Human. The same goes for ax-heads and needles. But once you get to items like beads and pottery vessels, you see the cultural trajectory lose conformity and develop based on materials available by individual local environment and customs."

"I had never really thought about it like that. I'm used to technology and more recent history I guess."  You shrugged.

"Indeed. One can hardly expect the modern mind to memorize all of the information whether historical or technological. Though I do try."

"You have some 'exceptional' advantages that the rest of us do not," you teased. You had not known him three rotations when he went on a detailed explanation of he and his brothers' 'defects' which did not sound like defects at all to you. Then he continued to explain how those traits made them more deviant than defective. You certainly understood that side of him as he often met with you when he should have been attending to GAR duties.

Satisfied with your visit to the 'stone' ages, you next traveled through time and to the fifth floor to the rise of cities and nation states.  

Tech stared at the first exhibit with fascination.  "The agricultural revolution varied by planet. Those that did not have crops that could be mass produced could only sustain small settlements, whereas those with large crops could maintain large cities that grew exponentially into kingdoms and nations."

"And wars and starvation."

"Yes," Tech turned to you, his brow furrowed with concern at your statement. Did you not find history as fascinating as he did? He knew your views on the war and cloning. He dared not ask, but all he could do was agree with you.

When Tech continued to stare at you, you realized maybe you had gone too far and put a damper on an outing that was supposed to be fun. "I'm sorry, Tech. I didn't mean to rain on your parade."

He adjusted his goggles thoughtfully. "I have seen plenty of rain on Kamino," he said understandingly. "You need not apologize. That is an unfortunately correct assessment of civilization. With growth and progress comes conflict and suffering. The two seem to go hand in hand, but I think rather to have faith that intelligence and good intentions have the advantage."

"In that case, it's almost as if sentient life is collectively "defective." You smiled, grateful for his understanding and wisdom. For being a clone maybe a third your age, if that, you can not but admire his calm and collected approach to situations and problems. The only thing he seemed to ever be nervous around is you, but that was understandable because you knew the clone troopers didn't exactly get lessons in romance in the GAR.

Tech merely pushed his goggles up the bridge of his nose with a knowing smile. He was never quite sure how to take your sarcasm, probably because he was self aware of his own and that of his brothers, Crosshair in particular. But the affectionate twinkle in your eyes and gentle flourish of your smile made his heart beat a little faster and the tips of his ears feel a little warmer.

He had not expected to become interested in a female. He was engineered to be a soldier, nothing more. Yet, you made him feel like he was more than that, that he wanted more even. He found himself returning to your shop even though he really did not need to.

And yet he did 'need' to.

Tech found himself smiling back at you. "Indeed. I must apologize. We have been to two floors of exhibits that I wanted to see. Is there something you would like to see?"

"No, Tech. This was all for you."

"I should very much like to learn about what interests you."

"Well, there is an atrium level. Gardens and ruins from other worlds. I remember being taken with the one from Naboo when I was a child." You felt a little weird saying that considering Tech was technically the same age as you were at the time. "You can actually sit there and relax. Or meditate like a Jedi." You shrugged.

"I would very much like that."

After browsing the garden exhibits of Kashyyyk, Chandrila, Selonia, and Old Coruscant, you settled in the Naboo section. A small waterfall splashed down a rock cliff before flowing through a makeshift river that encapsulated the area and then recycled back to the top of the waterfall. Lush green grass spread across one half before melding with a more tree and moss covered rocky area that housed some Gungan head statues. But what really amazed you not only as a child, but as an adult as well, were the guarlara statues that guarded the Naboo area.  

Tech studied you as you gazed upon the statues, content to witness your own fixation with something in the museum since you put up with his. "The guarlara, a quadrupedal mammal native to Naboo, having evolved the physical trait of speed on that planet's grassy plains and also a long mane of hair. Used as transportation before the speeder was invented and now only used for official royal business such as coronations."

"Sadly, I don't think I'll ever get a chance to ride one."

"No. They are reserved for royalty," Tech said a little too bluntly. But you knew he didn't mean anything by it and that he for the most part sympathized with you.

"Indeed," you echoed a word he had a habit of saying. "Let's sit over on that fancy stone bench. My feet are a little sore from all of the walking we've done."

"Indeed," Tech said in reply with a grin. He forgot you were probably not used to walking five or ten klicks or more as he was.

You both sat in silence as the sound of the waterfall drowned out the low chatter of the museum. You took extra satisfaction because Tech is sitting right next to you, so close that your arms and legs were touching.  

You knew he was a little nervous because he continued to look down at his datapad rather than enjoy the soothing sound of the waterfall, but maybe water just wasn't his thing.

“Hey Ace. What cycle are we heading for next?”

There it was. 'Ace.' One of your pet names for him. He wanted so badly to find one for you as well, but he wanted a special name, not the usual. He knew you liked driving and piloting as he did, but Ace could not work for both of you. He knew you also liked guarlaras, but there were not many equus related monikers that seemed suitable. Guarlara itself did not roll off the tongue very well. Pony was not very romantic. And mare simply sounded unsuitable.

Tech's eyes went from studying his datapad to studying the floor. He was disappointed that he could not find an ideal solution to this very simple quandary.

He now turned to you, studying your delicate features, so content to be in your favorite part of the museum, yet you were so colorful as well, not like anyone he had ever met before. When you turned to him, he took to studying the sparkle in your eyes, that seemed to represent everything he admired about you.

“What is it?” you asked, noticing Tech staring at you strangely.

He took your hand in his. "I was simply thinking about what an extraordinarily colorful woman you are. You remind me of the rainbows on Kamino. They were always so vibrant after a storm. And you are a vibrant beacon after all of the missions we go on. You are like a rainbow to me, albeit in adult human female form."

“Awwww...” You squeeze his hand and place your other hand over your heart. "I think that might be the sweetest thing anyone has ever said to me."

Tech could not help the large smile that spread across his face. “Then it is settled, Rainbow.”

You could not stifle the huge goofy smile that was spread across your face, beaming with happiness at Tech, whose eyes reflected your contentment. “You know, Ace, I think you might have earned the title of Captain.”

“That is not possible. Hunter is our Sergeant and first in line for that- Oh. You are referring to your speeder. You are going to let me pilot it?” Tech asked with a hopeful tweak of his goggles.

You laughed at him. “Come on, Captain Tech. Let's finish out the rest of the museum, then you can take me for ride.” The sly wink you gave him gave you exactly the fumbling reaction you desired.

Tech pushed his goggles up the bridge of his nose nervously and cleared his throat. “Yes. I shall take you for a ride in your speeder.”

After you were all done at the museum, you took note of Tech's excitement to sit on the pilot side of your speeder while you took the seat he had earlier.  Before you knew it, you were speeding away from the museum, up into the sky at a breakneck, but controlled speed, but it didn't matter, you knew he was a skilled pilot, and you trusted him with your life, and your heart.

Tech looked over at you, a huge smile spread across your face as the speeder breezed through the bright, neon signs and beaming lights of the other vehicles in the skylanes and shining through the windows of the skyscrapers.  All of the colors of the Coruscant evening did not compare to the lovely colors of you, his own personal Rainbow.

[salty-an-disco]

For ParaCold... Pre-Relationship 6, General 6, General 13, Love 11, Love 13, and/or Domestic Life 12? (Yes I am asking a lot, feel free to only answer one of these if you'd prefer! I just love your thoughts on them always~)

(I freakin' knew you'd come at me with the asking sheet lol /aff /pos)

Ship Questions Redux

Pre-relationship 6. What was their flirting stage like?

Veeeeery awkward. At least from Paranoid's perspective; the moment she started consciously flirting, she felt like a shelf full of glass jars constantly shaking and dropping everything onto the floor. She'd go out of her way to compliment Cold's additions to any convo or their appearance, all while sweating bullets and feeling like a giant fuckin' buffoon.

Cold, meanwhile, never registered anything he did as 'flirting', but when they saw Para actively flirting, it found the sight very amusing, and started going out of its way to compliment her back and even say some suggestive lines (cue Paranoid.exe stopping working and going into overdrive)

General 6. How do their personalities complement each other? How do they clash?

I mean– we already talked about this at lenght like aikskdmdjdmd

Cold is uniquely equipped to help Paranoid calm her nerves and look at situations with a more pragmatic view, while Para can make Cold consider being less reckless if only for other sakes, how they can read each other, the way their actions often clash but also helps them grow– aaaaaaaagggghhhh

General 13. Which one thinks they aren't good enough for the other, if at all?

Oh, they both have their own form of Imposter Syndrome.

Para knows she can unlikable to others, with how intense and inquisitive she can be, and she knows it's hard to approach her when she's already expecting the worst from others. And that's fine!! She can live like that, it's safer if others don't even try to approach cuz she seems a bit too prickly. And she often wonders if Cold would've felt the same if they weren't born from the same being–

Cold knows it's difficult. Knows others find it unsettling or menacing. And it's fine with that, really, it's a flattery that so many people think of it as an uniquely evil being. And Paranoid is no exception, she was definitely afraid of it in multiple occasions, but she still puts it aside to try and work with them. They're sure she wouldn't want anything to do with it if it didn't insistently follow her and got into her personal space, but it selfishly wants her attention. And if they're evil and scary and dangerous anyway, why bother if it's being a little selfish too?

Love 11. What kind of nicknames do they call each other?

I like the idea of Cold calling Para 'Dots' cuz of her plumage patterns. A cuter way to look at the markings that triggers Paranoid so much. She was very taken aback by it when it was first used, but didn't mind it and even came to like it.

I think Para definitely calls Cold some of the many nicknames the others gave her to tease her. 'Cool Guy' is one of her favorites for this. Avoids names like 'heartless' tho, cuz she noticed how those seem to actually get to Cold (it's very subtle, but she learned to read him at this point).

Love 13. How do they make up after an argument? Who is the first to apologize?

Depends on the argument, and how much one was at fault over the other. Para definitely apologizes as soon as she realizes she was being unfair/going a bit too far. Cold doesn't verbally apologize– almost never, but it does change its behavior when they notice how it upsets others and tries to make up for their actions through other ways.

Domestic Life 12. Who likes to dance with, or sing for, the other?

I know many have Cold with good singing voice hcs, but personally, I think he'd rather whistle than sing. And they have a very haunting but weirdly beautiful whistle, and can make many melodies with it. Para finds it weirdly comforting, so Cold will sometimes whistle for her.

[spider-bren]

MEANT TO KILL ME | VOLLER X READER

@shadesofkumquat gave this prompt so thank you!! And yes, you are right. There is nothing like enemies to lovers trope. Mads did look sooo good so I’m happy to write this. Hope you like it :)

Prompt: I’m desperately looking for a Jürgen Voller x Fem!Reader 👀 PLEASE 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻 Well maybe she’s been kidnapped or something like that kind of enemies to lovers (best ships God). You can even go very spicy, no limits there. Don’t know if that’s what you want to write as you specifically gave ideas, but i’m still taking my chance haha. Mads was so HANDSOME in this movie! (so yeah, I scream too)

Pairing: Jürgen Voller x Fem!Reader 

Warnings: Sexual Content, Kidnapping, Reader is Indiana’s student (but not really), Canonical Idealogy - Nazi, Enemies to Lovers 

Summary: You’ve been kidnapped by Voller’s goons and when Voller comes to you you both know you want each other 

You didn’t know where you were. Last thing you remembered was that you were on the street enjoying the festival and suddenly this large blonde American came out of nowhere and slipped a bag over your head, carrying you over his shoulder. Now that the bag was removed, you found yourself in a hotel room cuffed to the large made up bed. The cuffs hurt your thin wrists as you tried to yank yourself and slip free. 

“I wouldn’t do that if I were you,” said the blonde man who was sitting watching you on a chair with his feet propped up on the bed. He was wearing a suit which surprised you. 

Did kidnappers normally wear suits? Or were those just those movies where they were ski masks and stuff? 

“Voller wouldn’t like that,” he added with a click of his tongue. 

“Who is Voller?” you asked, wearily. 

“Voller is my boss. He asked me to bring you here. You know Doctor Jones, right?” 

“Yeah. I’m one of his students. What does this have to do with me?” 

“I don’t know really. All I know is that I have to keep you here until he comes back.” 

“Please, let me go. I don’t know anything I swear.” 

“Shut up.” 

The door opened and another man came in wearing a dark grey suit. 

“Thank you, Klaber,” the man in the glasses said to the blonde. Klaber exited the room leaving you two alone. 

“My name is Jürgen Voller." 

"What do you want from me?" You struggled against the binds again. 

Voller stalked towards you taking off his suit jacket and folding in on the chair Klaber was on. He neatly did up his sleeves before leaning over your small frame. His eyes were golden amber, flecks of green shone in them from behind the glasses. 

"I told Klaber to capture you because of Doctor Jones but really I wanted you for myself as soon as I saw you." He sniffed your hair and his lips grazed your ear. "You are very beautiful." 

He trailed his long fingers down your cheek. You shivered, trying to figure out what was going on. Your fight or flight response was dormant within you because some deep primal part of you liked this. Like being…captured. Being his prey. He was an extremely attractive man. High cheekbones and plush lips that now were kissing the juncture of your jaw and neckline. 

"You know who I am?" 

You shook your head at his question. Hands still strained in the chains, your body confused as a swift flush of heat settled in your stomach when he moved closer to you. 

"I'm the man that wants to do bad things. Bad things by societal standards, but good things for the world in the long run. I work for NASA. I helped put men in space. But this world needs more than men in little outfits dancing on the moon. It needs a leader. And I am one to do it. See, my dear, I want to kill Hitler. And take over…how does that make you feel?" 

Something in you stirred. Hatred. Disgust. This man was everything you had been taught to despise. You had no idea how the hell he was going to go back in time and kill Hitler but that didn't matter. He was evil. A bad, bad man. He wanted to better the world, but with his own force, his own power. His ideals didn't align with yours. Your conscience was rational, if anything. 

And yet…when his hands were on you that didn't matter. He was just a man. And you were just a woman. 

"Tell me, what do you think of it?" 

You gasped as his thumb and forefinger plucked at your hardened nipple. It was harsh. Rough. He didn't give you time to respond. 

"I bet it secretly turns you on. I bet you like it. It's wrong and you know it. Nothing wrong about sex. Nothing wrong about lust. You shouldn't be ashamed of your desires. I'm a scientist, I should know. It's natural to want things you know you shouldn't. That's what makes it even more alluring." 

His fingers edged towards your skirt and you mentally cursed yourself for deciding to wear it today. 

"You want me. Don't be shy now, little one. I will make it all better. When I first saw you, I wanted you. I knew that you'd resist me. You'd hate me. But that doesn't stop me. You want me like I want you. You can run. You can fight me. I will chase you across the world." 

"Jürgen," You cried as his fingers curled into your lace panties and found you soaked. 

"Klaber doesn't know. He doesn't know how long we've been playing this game. No one knows. How you don't work for Indiana. How we have been acting like we don't know each other for years. Two opposite sides. Different parts of the war. You stand to end me. Your job is to stop me. And you would even pretend to be in Indiana’s class just so I know where to find you. You never told me who you work for. CIA? Interpol? Some secret hate group towards me?" He smirked as he fucked you slowly and easy. 

You sighed and bit back moans at the remembrance of how good his fingers were. It had been too long. Voller was and had been your lover for some time now. And even though you were supposed to kill him, you loved him. All that mattered was his tongue stroking yours, his hands massaging your chest, and his fingers moving inside you making you shake and ache for him. 

"I guess I never need to know who you are. I already know you're mine."

[riotwritesthings]

Pride month request!!!

Color: purple my beloved

Ship: stony

Word prompt(if you want): sunflowers

Love youuuuuuu 🥰🥰🥰

I love youuuuu and you've already read this but I guess everyone else can read it too lol

Royal Purple

Stony - T, 600 - Fluff, artist!Steve Rogers

Yes this is technically part of "a series of learning experiences" But that's not important to read it

-

“You know, when you asked to paint me, this is not what I had in mind.”

“Do you want me to stop?” Steve asks, lifting his brush as he looks up at him.

“No no, just making conversation,” Tony says quickly.

“And moving my canvas in the process.”

“Hey, you knew I was gonna talk the whole time,” Tony points out, “and if you didn’t, well, are you even my boyfriend?”

“I did, and I am,” Steve says happily, turning his attention back to the field of wildflowers he’s painting across Tony’s stomach. “So what did you think I meant?” He asks as he carefully adds flourishes of color among the shades of green.

Tony hums, letting his gaze drift up to the ceiling, and finally says, “I don’t want to say now.”

"Did it involve the phrase ‘French girls’?"

“Noo…” Tony says slowly, trying to fight down a laugh, and he feels the bed beneath them shaking as Steve chuckles fondly. He quickly gets bored of staring at the ceiling and cranes his head down again to watch the movement of the paintbrush as he says, “So, tell me about these flowers.”

“What do you mean?” Steve asks distractedly.

“Well, like those purple ones, what are they called?”

"I don’t know any of the names," Steve says with a laugh, then lifts his brush and looks up when Tony makes surprised sputtering noises at him. “I just know what they look like, sort of!” He defends, “I’m working from memory here!”

“So you’re just making things up,” Tony says with an offended sniff, "and here I thought I was going to be your masterpiece."

“Hey now, I am putting thought into it here,” Steve pouts, flipping his paintbrush around to poke the end against one of the flowers near Tony’s hip. “This color is called royal purple, and I’ve been thinking that it would look perfect on you,” Steve explains, then shoots him a cheeky grin as he adds, “You know, because you’re my prince charming.”

“Boo, cheesy,” Tony says, but he can’t fight down his smile or the pleased flush rising in his cheeks.

“You love it,” Steve says confidently, grinning wider, and Tony can’t exactly argue that. Steve props himself up and then leans over to grab a different brush, his elbow digging into Tony’s thigh a little. “Here,” he says as he settles back down sprawled between Tony’s legs,“I’ll add a flower I do know the name of.”

“The suspense builds,” Tony says, dropping his head back against the pillow again.

He tries to figure out what Steve is painting from the ticklish drag of the brush, but he quickly loses track. So instead he lets his eyes fall closed and just tries not to squirm until Steve announces that he’s done.

“Alright, lets see the extent of your flower knowlege,” Tony says, lifting his head and looking down at himself. He finds a large, familiar yellow flower spread across his skin, the tips of its bright petals reaching from his ribs to his navel.

“Its a sunflower,” Steve says unnecessarily, smiling widely up at him and Tony can feel it coming as Steve adds, “because you’re my sunshine.”

"So cheesy," Tony accuses, but his voice comes out thick and he can’t resist reaching out. He gets his hand in Steve’s hair, on the curve of his shoulder, and then pulls him up into a kiss, heedless of the paint smearing between them.

“You love it,” Steve says again, smiling against his lips.

"I love you, Tony corrects, even though they both know its the same thing.

[yuuyuuuyuuuu]

Twisted Wonderland Headcanons

except it's a school night and im super tired and indecisive

REALLY QUICKLY BEFOREHAND!!! All of them are Asexual in my mind, because, so am I. And a handful of them are minors anyways... so.. ANYWAY YEAH I'll also try not to bring any ships into this so if you spot those you can disregard them k

additionally idk how to spell the dorm names so. yeah. (don't) sue me

Okay guys!!! wow let's actually get started!!

HEARTSLABYUL

Riddle Rosehearts: You know, his gender is kind of an enigma to me. Would be be a girl? Would he be a guy? Would he be enby? I have no idea. He probably likes men though. I think he might have some like.. internalized homophobia? Because of his mom and... yeah...... but it's ok!! He's learning guys and we love him for that. He/All

Trey Clover: uh.... sorry trey lovers but this is kinda just a guy. I mean maybe he's pan? Probably cis though. I feel like he maybe wouldn't care too much? But like when in doubt... make them aroace... He/Him

Cater Diamond: Okay y'all I saw a post where it was transmasc Cater and that was kind of awesome sauce... HOWEVER I am certainly an enjoyer of the concept of genderfluid cater. I think that's super neat... guys... Okay anyway moving on from whatever his gender is (Cater themself probably doesn't even know), this is a gay man if I've ever seen one. Probably unlabelled though! They/He/Any

Ace Trappola: Bi... I mean look at him.. Unrelated but this is the most severe case of bisexuality I have seen like, ever. Look at him. Look at this man. Also he's dating Deuce because I said so. I've also seen multiple (or maybe it was just one?) transmasc headcanons for him. Which seem awesome actually!! I love trans people guys idk. Anywhizzle (/ref.. yeah) He/Him

Deuce Spade: First off I saw the 'ADHD vs Autism' meme as him and Ace and that may or may not have influenced my perspective on him. but yeah proooobably autistic. I'm gonna say he's pan as well, mainly because that was my HC from the start (omg guys... laufey...). I kind of like transmasc Deuce but I also like demiboy Deuce. We can have both. Also I love him sm. He/They

SAVANNACLAW

Leona Kingscholar: He kinda confuses me but I know he lowkey hates everyone.. I don't wanna do the stereotypical like 'hates everyone cold and aloof' aroace thing but.. idk! Maybe he's gay. Probably. He gives me such....... gender. idk He/Him for now but maybe he's questioning. Or maybe he's too lazy for that?

Ruggie Bucchi: Okay... I'm quite conflicted between gay Ruggie and aroace Ruggie, but I think I'm leaning towards aroace. Probably a demiboy, so He/they

Jack Howl: Gay cis man I believe.. also I don't quite enjoy JackEpel but maybe onesided i.e. he had a crush on epel.. But also idk? cause I kinda don't like that trope?? Epel is a different matter. We'll get to him later... heh.... He/Him

OCTAVINELLE ocean dorm how do u spell

Azul Ashengrotto: I have no idea what to do with him. I'm so sorry everyone for disappointing you. I just do NOT know what to do with Azul. Maybe I can make another post for him? lmk if u want that. EDIT 2!!!: is he autistic. guys im reading the anthology. is he autistic..

Floyd Leech: ADHD and also I think he's omni. Probably men oriented? Also He/It

Jade Leech: Autism (omg!! twinning with Floyd!!!) and that aroace post I saw REALLYYY impacted me so. yes. aroace. Neoprns probably? But He/She/It for now.

SCARABIA

Kalim Al-Asim: AROACE GAY UAGHHHH sorry I like the aroace kalim concept. I feel like he might have a crush on Jamil? but maybe not. He also probably mixes up platonic vs romantic a LOT. genderflux, mayhaps? He/All also maybe dyslexia. if we try.

Jamil Viper: ALSO AROACE GAY.... listen.. I am actually not too big on kalim/jamil (which i may have said before), like they have fun angst but idk... but aroace Jamil has a special place w/ me. Genderfluid (A lot of them will probably be genderfluid... cause so am I...) He/She maybe autistic?

POMEFIORE AHHHHHHH

Vil Schoenheit: HOW DO U EVEN SPELL HIS LAST NAME ok so listen. Unlabelled probably (I know it's lazy of me... I'm sorry..) and genderfluid cause. fun story me and my /p wife are literally rookvil so.. yeah... She/He/They/All

Rook Hunt: Pan, Any/All but if u ask for pronouns will just give you whichever he feels like. Neos are cool with him too idk.

Epel Felmier: YAYYYY IT'S EPEL GUYS!! he's my fave so there's probably going to be some projecting. don't sue me. ALRIGHT so there's the obvious transmasc one. ofc. I am literally tweaking over it as we speak. And of course, aroace. I love aroace epel so much. As stated before, I feel like he'd look at the country songs and go 'huh.... okay....... y'all feel this???' LMAO ALSO ALSO platonic Epel/Deuce or AppleJuice as I love calling it is SO SO important to me. please. I need more platonic AppleJuice. I think it's super awesome and funky and maybe a QPR. also He/Him

IGNIHYDE

Idia Shroud: I believe that we as a community probably have about the same views on him, but I never really formulated mine so. here you go. First off he's at least bi. Second I feel like he's questioning his gender so he changes his pronouns a lot. Probably questioning genderfluid? I saw smth that said he uses neos online and I was like awesome!! Use ur imaginations for those and maybe lmk ur thoughts cause I am SUPER tired. He/It/They also edit: I FORGOT TO WRITE THAT HE WAS AUTISTIC. OH MY GOD. yeah he's autistic

Ortho Shroud: Literally a child AND robot. But if I had to choose. I would say She/He with a sprinkle of aroace. Not cause he's a robot but she would have to put up with Idia all the time so he's prob desensitized atp.

DIASOMNIA i am so paranoid my parents are gonna come in HELPP

Malleus Draconia: I saw (yes I don't get my own opinions and no I'm not gonna start.) an aroace headcanon and I think that is super awesome.. he probably wants a QPR!! guys!! He/Him but if you call him anything else he doesn't really care LMAO edit(again): ALSO I forgot he was autistic

Lilia Vanrogue: Agender and pronoun apathetic (?) if that's the word? basically Any/All. I have no idea on sexuality but like.. Probably unlabelled because atp his labels were lost in the war.

Silver: I love their lack of last name and no I won't go see if he has one. GUYS CAN WE GET AN AROACE SILVER??? WOOO ok but maybe aroaceflux? also maybe intersex (please educate me in this topic because I am very unversed!! ty!!) They/He

Sebek Zigvolt: .....gay aroace... again... also loud autism!! He/It and neos probably?

OKKK THAT'S ALL!! y'all i ran out of steam at the end can you tell?? anyway i have to go to school tomorrow so. yeah. bye guys GN AHH

[thesymphonytrue]

Hi hello!!!

“Oh honey, I’d never be jealous of you.”

This line has SUCH Elle energy!! Whatever ship u want but it would be so cool if she said it

I immediately thought of El with this line, too!!! So yes....she says it!

Peter/Elizabeth

Pre-canon

"Oh honey, I'd never be jealous of you."

Elizabeth turned over in bed, surprised to find a cold, empty spot where Peter usually slept. Sighing, she propped herself up and checked the time: 3:00 am. Furrowing her dark brows, she pulled back the covers and tiptoed down the hallway to the top of the stairs. Peering into the living room, she saw Peter.

He was sitting on the couch, hair still messy from their evening romp hours ago, clad in a white t-shirt and boxers. One hand loosely held his phone to his ear, while the other rubbed his eyebrows wearily. But on his lips, on those wonderful lips that devoured Elizabeth almost daily, was a tiny smile, a sparkle of amusement and infatuation.

Neal Caffrey, Elizabeth thought.

This was the third night in a row that Neal Caffrey had called Peter and while Elizabeth didn’t so much mind Peter being all-consumed by his job, post-midnight phone calls were…

Intriguing.

In Elizabeth’s mind, Neal was a brilliant mind who had fallen into the wrong crowd (criminals) and latched onto Peter’s stability, whilst also out-smarting him on almost every turn.

And Peter fucking loved it.

When Peter Burke was challenged, Peter Burke thrived. Elizabeth smiled to herself; she knew this on an emotional, intellectual, and sexual level about her partner. Peter was meticulous about learning everything about his pursuit, making him an excellent FBI Agent, but even better in bed.

She smiled coily to herself and decided tonight would be the night she intervened. She couldn’t have a criminal stealing her husband away, could she? Well aware that she was still in lingerie from earlier (a lovely lacy black thing that left absolutely nothing up to the imagination), Elizabeth fluffed her hair, squared her shoulders, and pranced down the stairs like a runway model.

Peter was mid-chuckle when he spotted her, cheeks flushing and eyes widening at the sight of her soft curves. She walked over to him like a lioness stalking her prey and plucked the phone from his hands.

“Hello, Neal Caffrey,” she said cooly into the phone.

She could practically feel him grinning on the other end.

“Is this the famous Mrs. Burke? I was convinced Peter was lying about having a wife. How do you put up with him, he’s insufferably stubborn,” Neal rattled off as if he and Elizabeth were the best of friends.

Elizabeth couldn’t help but feel a smile tickle her lips as she stole a glance at Peter, whose mouth was propped open in despair and eyes wild with panic.

“Well, you’re right about that,” she said, proceeding to straddle Peter and play with his hair while keeping Neal on the line.

“So why are you up at this hour?” Neal chirped, “Are you jealous?”

Elizabeth chuckled, low and sultry, leaning in and kissing Peter’s neck, to which Peter suppressed a groan and motioned for her to hang up the phone immediately.

“Oh honey, I could never be jealous of you,” she said, speaking to Neal, but looking directly into Peter’s honey-brown eyes, whose pupils were now fully dilated.

“Have Peter shown you my picture?” Neal asked, audibly smirking.

Elizabeth narrowed her eyes, realizing she didn’t know anything about this man other than his name and criminal habits.

“No, he hasn’t,” her gaze flicked to Peter, who was still clueless as to the nature of their conversation. She caressed Peter’s cheek, “But looks don’t matter to Peter,” her eyes twinkled as she widened her legs on Peter and pressed herself closer to him, “Peter loves smart—”

“Well isn’t he lucky that he’s got both in you, Elizabeth,” Neal cut her off, as if he knew exactly what she was trying to do.

“Hang up the phone!” Peter mouthed desperately.

Elizabeth’s eyebrow arched in pleasure at hearing this as she surveyed Peter, practically panting after her.

“Thank you for the compliment, Neal,” Elizabeth purred simultaneously into Peter’s ear and the phone, “Now say goodnight to Peter and let him come back to bed with his wife.”

Neal let out a bright laugh at this, one that even Peter could hear through the phone. Peter turned beet red and promptly snatched the phone back from Elizabeth and gripped her waist, gently pushing her off of him and setting her down next to him as he stood.

“Peter! I didn’t know that you had such an active—-“

“Shut it, Caffrey! Goodnight!” Peter barked, clicking the phone off, Neal’s laughter still echoing in Elizabeth and Peter’s mind.

Elizabeth stood and snaked a hand around Peter’s chest from behind, pressing her breasts into his back. She felt him tighten in response and she rested a hand over his fast beating heart.

She glanced down at the coffee table, Neal Caffrey’s file open. A photograph was pinned to the edge of the file.

Slightly blurry due to Neal being in motion, it was a picture of a dark haired man with brilliant blue eyes, chiseled jawline, and wild smile. He was handsome enough to make any woman–or man–swoon.

“Now that you’re all hot and bothered,” she whispered in Peter’s ear, “should we go to bed or take the couch? Or has Neal put a damper on things?”

Peter turned to face her, his hands tracing the curves of her waist, cupping her supple—and practically bare—ass and kissed her passionately on the lips.

“Couch will do,” he said gruffly, lowering her to the sofa.

Elizabeth sighed and smiled as wrapped her legs around him and pulled him on top of her, satisfied with how Peter's 3 am call had ended. She wondered how long this Neal Caffrey would invade their lives. No, Elizabeth was not jealous, but that didn’t mean she wouldn’t take advantage of the perks this handsome criminal’s pursuit of Peter provided.