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thechaoticdruid · 10 months

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[The Spawn Vs The Ascendant]

Astarion(s) x Tav

Plot: I made a post a while back about Ascended Astarion meeting Spawn Astarion via multiversal timeline shenanigans and legit maybe one person shared a fic with a similar premise.

So basically I was like *puts on infinity gauntlet* “Fine, I'll do it myself.”

Content Warning// 18+ for Sexual humor and suggestive themes. I legit have not been in the fanfiction business in years so go easy on me.

Characters might be ooc. Spelling/Grammar mistakes may be present. A wee bit of blood and violence. Gale is made fun of. Tav is based heavily off my human druid Tav, Winnie and uses She/Her pronouns.//

Possible Triggers: Ascended Astarion, kidnapping, mentioned character death, possessiveness, obsession, AA touches Tav without her consent (not sexually tho), Galeshaming.

~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•

Ah, the Elfsong. There was really no better place to unwind after a long day of adventuring. And there was really nothing better to help one unwind than a favorite snack, a cold drink and lovely company. Unfortunately for Tav she'd have to wait up on the company as her beloved was currently preoccupied with his nightly grooming. Gods only know how long that man will take doing his hair. The human female rolled her eyes and brought her wine bottle to her lips taking a few swigs before biting into some cheese she'd been nibbling on prior. Tav lounged about on their shared bed wearing nothing but a black tank and red boxers. Despite the peace and relaxation she was getting pretty bored without her love to snuggle and gossip with. Tav finished off the last few bites of cheese before she pulled out the private journal she'd been keeping since this whole adventure began. Little doodles of her partner decorated the pages along with her chicken scratch handwriting.

She had documented details of their adventure whenever she had the chance and also took the time to add various doodles of her companions and any monsters they encountered. (Some of her favorite drawings included herself opening a bottle and releasing a spectator. And of course a lovely little drawing of her and Astarion kicking the shit out of Cazador.)

As she waited Tav began to entertain herself by writing down a to-do list.

“Ah lets see��Yep definitely gonna have to have a chat with that pompous prick who was threatening a kid the other day. Maybe I can invite him back to the tavern later? I'm sure Star wouldn't mind having a snack.” Tav hummed, scribbling down everything she had planned out as of late.

Shit I need to do:

‘Feed rich tit to boyfriend.’

‘Teach Shadowheart to swim.’

‘Buy Clive a best friend.’

‘Murder baddies.’

‘Wildshape into a pigeon and shit on Gortash's head.’

‘Buy boyfriend cute clothes.’

‘Take Gale shopping for wizardy stuff.’

‘Look into real estate in the Underdark.’

‘Take Scratch for a walk.’

‘Kill more bad people.’

‘Contemplate licking dead spider.’

‘Be screamed at by Gale for licking dead spider.’

‘Buy flowers for Karlach and Shadowheart.’

‘Buy boyfriend more cute clothes.’

‘Study wizard stuff.’

‘Help Moon Lesbians plan wedding.’

‘Research ring of the sunwalker.’

‘Piss off the Gods……Again…’

‘Remember to take Astarion on romantic beach date before fighting the Elder Brain.’

‘Unalive people of not goodness.’

‘Shave Gale’s beard while he sleeps.’

‘Continue writing smutty novel series so I can keep buying boyfriend cute clothes.’

“Tav, a word please.” Gale appeared from around the corner. Tav groaned, annoyed by the prospect of having to get up. Especially since Gale looked like he was going to scold her for something. Begrudgingly she hopped off the bed, leaving the comfort of her room to see what in the hells that damn wizard wanted.

“What do you need, Gale? I'm kinda in the middle of writing down my to-do list.”

“Am I inclined to believe that you've been writing erotic novels that feature Astarion and I?” The wizard inquired.

“Pfft! What in the hells gave you that idea!” Tav laughed, her eyes staring off to the side nervously as she twiddled her thumbs. Gale pulled out a red leather bound book titled ‘Blood-Mage’. It was a ridiculously smutty novel about a young handsome sorcerer named Garrett Delarous who is reluctantly forced to team up with a dastardly, but world endingly beautiful Vampire Lord in order to save the world or some shit. (The book mostly focused more on smut than plot.) Amazingly the novel had made a killing after Tav had peddled it at Sharess's Caress. It seemed nearly everyone wanted a copy. (Tav was also pretty sure she noticed Halsin was reading the book as well.)

“My series is about a renowned sorcerer and a Vampire Lord. There's a difference, Gale.” Tav crossed her arms with a huff.

“You can't just profit off of other people's likenesses Tav! You at least need to pay them royalties!”

“I always give half the money I earn to Astarion.”

“I’m talking about me!”

“I think my beloved ‘gloves of power’ were more than enough payment for you.” Tav huffed before looking off to the side with a sad look.

I miss those gloves so much.

Gale sighed in annoyance, pinching the bride of his nose. He was used to Tav’s shenanigans at this point but this was just ridiculous. Not to mention while skimming through Tav's scandalous work he noticed the sorcerer was always on the bottom during intimate scenes. The audacity!

“Besides I use the money I make from this for not only myself and Astarion, but the rest of the camp as well. Adventuring ain't cheap ya know?”

“You can at least give me a small percentage of the profits. Say thirty percent?”

“Ten percent.” Tav said flatly.

“Twenty percent?”

“Ten percent.” Tav repeated.

“Fine.” Gale gives in, causing the shorter of the two to smirk triumphantly. Tav watched smugly as the wizard slumped off in defeat before quickly adding another note to her to-do list.

‘Give 10% of book money to the stinky wizard.’

Tav finished off her list as she felt a pair of cool arms wrap around her form from behind, her cheeks tinting light pink. “Do you really need to take five hours in the bath?” She hummed, turning her head to meet her partner’s crimson gaze. His hair was dry and looked rather soft and silky and he was dressed in this eccentric red silk robe with fluffy black trim.

“You can't rush art, darling.” Astarion purred before nuzzling his cheek against hers. “You know if you were getting impatient you could have joined me in the tub. I would have loved the company.” He murmured huskily.

“In these tiny ass bathtubs? I'd have to sit on your lap and even then I doubt we'd have enough room to really do anything.” Tav replied, nuzzling back against him.

“We could still try.~” The vampire cooed.

“Tempting, but the others have whined enough about our night time activities. Apparently we're noisy.”

“Then perhaps next time I shall have to gag you won't I?”

“Alright! I'm ending this conversation here!” Tav said quickly, face burning up at his teasing.

“Besides, I’ll need some sleep for tomorrow. Gortash won't kill himself, unfortunately.” Tav said with a yawn.

“Really? Now? I was hoping you'd at least cuddle with me before bed.” Astarion pouted.

“Oh you poor thing. Fine, we can cuddle till I fall asleep. Cutie.” The human female smiled sweetly before planting a kiss on her lover's cheek, receiving a content hum in response. Tav turned to pull away from the elf's embrace before suddenly feeling herself be scooped up and tossed over his shoulder.

“Hey! What did I say about picking me up!?” She whined, squirming a bit as she hung over his shoulder. “I don't like being manhandled!”

“But you're so adorable like this.~” Astarion teased, his hand gripping her ass as he carried over to the bed. Despite Tav’s complaints she did little else in protest besides pout and blush as she was whisked away. The two of them soon settled on the bed, Tav immediately nuzzling into Astarion's chest and relaxing. Astarion’s clawed fingernails found their way into her messy locks, caressing and running through them as the two snuggled together. His skin was cold to the touch, but honestly Tav actually liked it. It kinda reminded her of the cool side of her pillow. Even though there was the constant threat of death around every corner the two of them were still able to cherish their time together, and hopefully now that Astarion had been freed of his master they would continue to do so.

There was still the tiny issue of an evil alien brain thing that could turn them into soulless squid monsters, but they'd be able to take care of that sooner or later. A part of Tav wanted to put it off as selfish and dangerous as it could be. Because as soon as they destroyed the brain, they'd destroy the only protection Astarion had against the sun. Tav wasn't about to give up on finding a way for her love to enjoy the sun, but for now she'd at least make the time he has left in it special.

“Star….” Tav murmured aloud, her head tilting upwards to meet her partner's eyes.

“Yes dear?” He hummed.

“You know there's actually something I've been meaning to talk to you about. We've been together for a while now and well…we haven't actually had a real date….I mean I guess it's understandable considering we have to save the world and shit, but I was thinking maybe if there's time we could do something together....” Tav bit down on her lip as she sat up on the bed. She felt nervous all of a sudden, not used to asking for stuff like this. Astarion had always been the one to initiate most of their romantic activities. The best Tav could do was a kiss on the cheek or a hug and even that had taken a while for her to get comfortable with.

“What about all our little late night trysts? Do those not count as dates?” Astarion raised an eyebrow though his tone was playful.

“Ehh…well…rolling around in the dirt in the middle of nowhere isn't exactly what I'd call a date.” Tav said awkwardly, earning a chuckle from her vampire.

“I suppose you're right. We've never really had any bonding time without you being pinned underneath me.” He joked before quickly clearing his throat and finally trying to be serious. “What do you have in mind, darling?”

“I just want to take you out somewhere…We could go out to eat or just walk in the park….” The human female twiddled her thumbs as she trailed off, feeling butterflies in her stomach. “I'd be up for anything really as long as I'm with you.”

“I…would like that very much, my love.” Astarion cupped her cheek, his eyes soft and full of affection. He pulled her into a sweet chaste kiss, allowing her to return it before she pulled back and rested his forehead against hers.

Thudd!

Tav quickly pulled back from Astarion's embrace as she heard a noise. She looked around frantically for the sound.

“Tav? Is something wrong?” Astarion asked.

“I just heard something…” She said before suddenly her eyes landed at the window near their bed. On the opposite side of the window seat a small white bat could be seen looking through the glass. Its little red eyes stared at the human with an intense gaze. “It's a bat.” Tav pointed towards the window. Astarion looked over at the little creature before internally groaning.

No. She better not even think about it!

The bat blinked, looking at Tav a few times before curling its left wing against its body.

“I think its wing is injured!” Tav exclaimed with concern.

“Ugh leave it! We've taken in enough stray beasts!” Astarion scoffed, but Tav immediately ignored him, rushing over to the window.

“Tav! Don't! It probably has some horrible disease or something!”

Tav quickly opened the window, her eyes going soft as she looked down at the small animal. She moved to scoop it up into her arms but before she could the bat simply fell back.

“Shit!” She shouted.

“Thank the gods, it's dead. Now come back to bed, darling.” Astarion said, patting the spot besides him. Tav just glared at him silently before suddenly she wildshaped into a raven and flew out the window.

~•~•~•~•~

While Tav didn't preach about nature 24/7 like Halsin did she was still just as much of a druid as he was and couldn't bear to stay by while an injured animal was in need. (Much to her lover's dismay.) She'd flown out the window of their room and circled around looking for the little bat.

There was no sign of the winged beast anywhere near the elfsong, but at least that was a sign it likely hadn't fallen to its death. Tav kept searching, eventually straying further from the tavern until she was forced to land and give her wings a breather, returning back to her human form.

“Dammit it's so dark I can't tell where I am. Everything looks different at night.” Her eyes strained as she struggled to make out any familiarity. Despite having lived in Baldur's Gate for about ten years Tav had always made it a point not to roam about at night. Her lack of dark vision made night time prowling even more dangerous, especially in this city.

She decided to reserve her strength instead of wild-shaping again. From what she could make out in the dark she'd found herself in one of the back alleys. Tav kept stumbling around in the dark for a while until at last she began to consider heading back. The bat likely wasn't dead since she had seen no hair or hide of it and she really wasn't in the mood to find herself in trouble. It constantly seemed to follow Tav these days it seemed. Last time she wandered around the city by herself she got into a fist fight with some stuck up noble lady who had referred to her as ‘a fat ugly little boy’. (The others were not happy about sneaking her out of prison that day.)

Just as Tav was about to assume the form of a beast fit for the night she noticed some light up ahead. The graveyard had been illuminated by a couple of lanterns. Tav approached hoping it would help her map out her way back if she just remembered how to get to the Elfsong from there. However as soon as she got close to the light someone was waiting for her.

“Astarion?” Tav called out as her silver haired lover stepped out of the darkness. She expected nagging, and complaining about having to come out here looking for her, but instead Astarion just stared at her intensely as if studying every detail of her face. “Are you okay?” She asked with concern. Something was very strange about this. Astarion being quiet for long was never a good sign. Tav scanned him over, almost immediately noting his elegant attire. A black and red suit with silver bats embroidered on it. Odd. Tav had never seen him wear this outfit before. And he was always quick to show off any new clothes to her, seeking her praise. Astarion moved towards her quickly and out of nowhere pulled her into a crushing hug.

“Yes of course. I was just worried about you, my sweet.” His grip on her was almost uncomfortably tight, as if he was holding onto her for dear life.

“I haven't been gone that long….” Tav stiffened. There was an abnormal warmth to his body. Sure he was able to raise his temperature after feeding, but there was hardly a decent supply of beasties for him to nibble on in this city, not to mention he would have had to have found one pretty damn fast before seeking her out.

“You’ve always been such a brave little thing, haven't you?” He let out a chuckle, his grip on her didn’t falter. His tone didn't seem threatening, but one thing for sure set off an alarm in her.

Thump-thump.

Tav immediately ripped herself away from him and took a few steps back, her eyes glaring daggers. “Who the hells are you?” She snapped.

“Whatever, ever do you mean, pet?” His voice was full of false innocence, it reminded her a lot of how Astarion would often speak whenever accusations were hurled at him, but this person was definitely not her lover.

Tav’s first instinct was to assume he'd probably been one of the shape-changers they'd been attacked by in the past, but there was this gnawing gut feeling that this time was different.

“Drop the act. I've already met enough shit heads running around wearing someone else's face. Who are you really?”

“I’m Astarion. Really dear, I'm disappointed you have so little faith in me that you'd think I'd allow some lowly shape-changers near you.” He took a few steps forward.

“Stay away from me…” Tav growled out through gritted teeth. Damnit. She didn't have any weapons and was literally in her sleepwear.

“You seem tired, love. Perhaps we should head back so you can get some rest?” He extended his hand towards her. Tav was about to say something else before suddenly an arrow came out of nowhere, nearly hitting the Astarion look alike in the shoulder. He was able to dodge just in the nick of time. Tav gasped in surprise before quickly turning back to see another…. Astarion?

The two looked identical aside from their clothing. The imposter was wearing his elegant suit and the other one (whom Tav hoped to the gods was actually him) was wearing a familiar red and black doublet.

“Hells teeth.” Astarion spoke up as he looked over at the two. Tav immediately sniffed air around the second Astarion. The tiniest whiff of death hit her senses and immediately she ran over to him.

“Star!” Tav was by his side in an instant. His arm quickly looped around her hip protectively before he scanned over her face.

“Are you alright?” He asked, receiving a nod in response. Astarion then looked over towards his look alike. “My, aren't you just beautiful? I must admit I'm quite flattered you chose to imitate me.”

“Is that what you think of me? I'm hurt.” The other vampire laughed. “I am no mere imitation. I am you…..well a better you.”

“You're not making any sense!” Tav hissed, her jaw clenching as she suppressed the urge to let out an animal-like growl.

“Allow me to shed some light on it then. I come from a reality where instead of choosing to remain weak and pathetic we became who we always wanted to be.” Tav's eyes widened at the revelation, though she was still debating whether or not to believe all this madness. Of course she'd been to hells, the shadowfell and even fought a god so maybe this wasn't too far fetched.

“The Vampire Ascendant.”

“If you're telling the truth then why are you here? You have everything you want don't you?” The vampire spawn quirked an eyebrow. Meanwhile the Ascendant’s face suddenly turned cold. He almost looked sad.

“I did. Wealth, power, pleasure, everything I could ever dream of. I was on the cusp of dominating the entirety of the sword coast. Everything was mine. But none of it mattered without the one thing I cherished most. My beloved consort. My Tav.” His eyes suddenly locked into the human female. She felt small, cornered, like a rat caught between a cat’s paws. “He was taken from me…”

Tav stiffened, taking a step back. She really did not like where this was going. Her lover kept a gentle hold on her, staying between her and the other vampire.

“And now you're here to take my Tav I presume?” Astarion scoffed, “you obviously didn't care very much about yours then if you're already looking for a replacement.”

“HE WAS EVERYTHING TO ME!” Before Tav could think her lover was knocked off his feet. A punch had come at him faster than he could react. The Ascendant stood over him, shaking with anger. Tav moved over towards the vampire spawn as quickly as she could, checking him out. He seemed alright, albeit a little winded, possibly bruised. Astarion huffed, getting back to his feet. Tav was quick to cast cure wounds on him to help perk him back up.

The Ascendant took in a breath, regaining his composure. While the spawn swiftly tossed Tav a spare dagger from his pack. A fight was likely inevitable now.

“I’ve searched across thousands of timelines. None of these pathetic excuses for adventurers came even close to my beloved. That is…until I found you of course…” The vampire lord pointed a clawed finger at the druid. “You're the only one who resembles him in the slightest, albeit you are a bit more…voluptuous than he was.” He chuckled a bit.

“Okay hold on a minute! You can't just come here and take someone else’s Tav because you lost yours!” Tav pointed her dagger shakily towards him.

“My dear, I don't think you understand. I am the Vampire Ascendant. I can take whatever I want!”

“I don't care if you're the fucking god of gnomes I'm not going anywhere with you. I have my own Astarion.” Tav gripped the blade tightly while her free hand prepared to cast a spell.

“I had hoped you'd come quietly, but it seems we'll have to do this the hard way.” With a flash of pink light Tav was hit with a sleeping spell and fell to the ground unconscious. Her dagger dropped to the ground with a clatter. The spawn was quick to move in front of Tav taking out his rapier and aiming a swipe at the other vampire.

The Ascendant stepped back just as the thin slender blade nicked a cut across his attire, just barely missing his flesh. The spawn took another swing at him, nicking his side and gaining a kick to the ribs in return. The spawn huffed, quickly recovering before moving in for another attack.

However the Ascendant’s clawed hand struck first, slashing through the armor surrounding the Astarion's shoulder and slicing his flesh. The spawn cried out and gripped his arm as his counterpart smirked smugly, bringing his finger up to his lips and basically tasting his own blood.

“Mmm…Delicious.~” He purred. The Ascendant’s crimson eyes trailed over towards Tav before beginning to glow red. “To me, now.” He said as if issuing a command to unseen soldiers.

Within seconds two oddly familiar figures appeared out of mist. A sickly pale looking Halsin and Shadowheart, both with glowing red orbs for eyes.

“Gods below. You've turned your own friends into spawn!?” Astarion gasped, his face full of disgust.

“Eh…I wouldn't exactly call them friends…. Though they are much more compliant this way.” The vampire lord replied with a toothy grin. The spawn felt sick to his stomach. To think he could have ended up this way.

“Take care of my inferior self, would you darlings? I have places to be…” The Ascendant gave a small wave before quickly scooping the unconscious Tav up in his arms.

“Yes master.” The undead Shadowheart and Halsin replied, a bright red light shone around their bodies as they were compelled to attack.

“Farewell beautiful.” The vampire lord gave his spawn self a wink before quickly vanishing into mist, taking Tav along with him.

~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~

“Astarion….” Tav muttered tossing and turning in her sleep as she slowly began to come to. She shot up in a cold sweat, her heart pounding.

“Ugh…That was a terrible dream. Star you wouldn't believe…” Tav went silent as her eyes scanned her surroundings. It in fact was not a dream.

“Oh gods damnit.” She huffed.

Tav was in a large elegant looking bedroom, lying upon a purple queen size bed adorned with fine silk sheets. Maroon red walls surrounded her and were decorated nicely by paintings and other fine wall decor. The first thing the druid noticed after taking in her surroundings was the pressure around her neck. Her hands quickly reached for her throat feeling what seemed like a tight choker of some kind. She quickly hopped off the bed and looked into the mirror of a nearby vanity that sat west of the bed. “Fucking hells.” She breathed out as her eyes laid upon a black and red collar adorning her neck. There was this unnerving glow surrounding the collar. Most likely some kind of magic was placed on it. Quickly she curled her fingers preparing to use a spell in order to tear this damn thing off of her, but nothing happened.

This thing must be silencing my casting somehow.

Tav for a moment before forming an idea. She could probably wildshape into something small and squeeze out. Maybe. The druid sighed before getting on all fours preparing to transform into a rat. She let out a grunt, but nothing happened.

“Oh fuck you!” She shouted before rolling and desperately trying to yank the collar off.

Tav growled and pulled on the neck piece, yanking as hard as she could, resorting to gnawing on it.

Knock knock.

The druid immediately ceased her actions at the sound of the door. A shiver went down her spine at the thought of it being that so-called ‘Vampire Ascendant’ again. Her eyes flickered around the room before she took hold of a candle stick and stood next to the door, back pressed against the wall.

The door creaked open and a small figure walked inside. Tav prepared herself to strike down whoever had entered, but froze upon seeing the person. It was a small blonde haired half-elf woman, dressed in a house keeper's attire.

Tav quickly looked into her eyes, letting out a sigh of relief as she noticed they were blue. She set the candlestick down on the vanity and looked at the half-elf curiously. “Who are you?” She asked.

“My name is Abigail, milady. The master sent me to help you get dressed and make sure you come see him.” The small woman piped up in a small soft voice. Abigail was petite and quite short, probably about an inch or two shorter than Tav was, though the druid estimated the half elf was probably around the same age as she was…well physically anyway. With elves you could really never tell.

“And exactly where am I?” Tav crossed her arms.

“The Crimson palace milady. My lord has taken up residence here while he stays in your realm.” Abigail replied before scurrying across the room, towards a closet. “It'd be best not to keep him waiting, my lady.” The half-elf rummaged around through the closet before taking a couple of different outfits to choose from and spreading them out over the bed. “My apologies if you'd prefer a dress, but this is all we could bring with us from our world.”

Tav blushed a bit in embarrassment as she realized she was still only wearing a tank and boxers. She looked over at the bed and took note of the three suits that laid out in front of her.

“These belonged to Master Tav. Master Astarion said they'd likely fit you, my lady.”

“Now hold on, I have questions! How did you all get here, and what is this thing!?” Tav demanded as she tugged on her collar once again.

“I'm sorry I can say no more. Please miss, just get dressed.” Abigail pleaded,a hint of fear was in her tone. Tav was hesitant, but begrudgingly she slipped off her tank before sliding into one of the suits, a red one that felt a little snug on her, but actually not by much. The only issue being that she couldn't get the top three buttons of the white undershirt that went with it to button. It left her cleavage slightly exposed. Her eyebrow twitched in annoyance.

“Okay, I'm ready.” She said, Abigail nodded and began to lead the druid out of the room.

Perhaps this was her chance? She could make a break for it on their way out! Tav braced herself to bolt only to be met with a shockingly familiar face as she exited the room. Lae'zel. Or well a vampire spawn that looked completely identical to her githyanki companion aside from a pair of glowing red.

“Dear gods, Lae'zel, what happened to you? Did Astarion do this?” Tav gasped in shock.

“She's not your Lae'zel, milady.” Abigail spoke up.

“I was told to make sure the master’s new pet came quietly, not to answer questions.” Lae’zel simply replied.

“Come on, let's go.” Abigail took hold of Tav’s arm, giving her a gentle smile before tugging her along. Lae'zel quietly followed, a seemingly permanent scowl on her face as she watched Tav's every move, almost daring her to run for it.

The three walked down a long corridor for what seemed like hours. The sound of footsteps along with her own heartbeat seemed to be the only thing Tav could process as a gnawing anxiety set in. Her chest tightened, her throat felt dry and she could feel this nervous pain dancing across her spine. She wasn't sure why but something about this other Astarion scared her. This Vampire Ascendant. She had never been afraid of her beloved spawn, hells she wasn't even afraid of Cazador or any other vampire she had come across on their journey, but something about her lover's counterpart made her skin crawl.

“Well aren't you just precious?” A seductive pur tore Tav from her thoughts, forcing her to look up and realize she'd been dragged out into the ballroom. It definitely was a lot cleaner than the past time she'd been here. All the blood and wolf corpses had been dealt with. Just how long has this other Astarion been here? He couldn't have just started squatting here, found and kidnapped Tav, and had time to clean everything up on the same day! The Vampire Ascendant sat upon Cazador’s old throne, looking down at Tav. His eyes trailing over her.

Tav took a deep breath before clearing her throat and trying to appear confident.

“Where is Astarion? And I mean my Astarion.”

“You needn’t concern yourself with him any longer. You're mine now and I will give you so much more than he ever could.~” The Vampire Lord stood up and stepped towards Tav slowly.

“I’m not your Tav. I can never be him.” The druid backed up a little, however with Lae’zel’s presence behind her she didn't have much room to retreat. She wasn't sure if reasoning with this alternate version of her lover was possible, but it was worth a shot if nothing else. However instead of listening he swiftly took her hands in his.

“No need to be modest, my pet, you're practically like him in every way. You have his eyes, his face, the same little quirks and ticks. Granted, you're built a little different anatomically, but that's not something that ever deterred me.” Astarion moved in closer, briefly pressing his lips against her knuckles. “And now that I've found you, nothing will ever part us. Not again.” Before Tav could speak she was pulled in for another tight hug. She squirmed a bit, conflicted feelings of pity and fear were arguing back and forth in her mind as she felt him nuzzling his face into her neck. He was clearly dangerous, but he also seemed heartbroken. He wanted anyway to have his lover back so badly he crossed time itself to see them again. Or at least someone who resembled them.

But Tav knew deep down she wouldn't be enough to fill the void left by her counterpart. Gods, she hoped there would be a happy ending to all of this.

~•~•~•~•~•~

A little note from ChaoticDruid: I really hope it didn't suck! I haven't published a fanfic in so long >~< This idea had just been swimming around in my brain forever I just had to get it out! I got the idea from the PS5 launch party animation and seeing Launch Astarion and EA Astarion flirting just made me go okay but what if it was Ascended Astarion and Spawn Astarion?

I don't know if I will continue it. I have other things I wanna write and my ADD makes this stuff so freaking hard. But maybe maybe not 🤞🤞

Part 2: LETS GOOOOOOO

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owmylasagna-blog · 9 months

Text

Ed is Thicker Than Mud

Warning: Character development arc may take a couple years to take full effect.

Some random musings on post-BPS Eddy growing pains.

You can also read it over on AO3.

Each mechanical tick of the outdated relic of a wall clock reverberating through the office makes his skin crawl. Wriggling uncomfortably, the naugahyde of the chair releases a series of unnatural whines of protest beneath the restless teen. Don’t they know precious moments of his youth are slipping away with every infuriatingly useless second spent shedding dead skin cells in this room? It doesn’t help that his jeans are still damp. He’s pretty sure his new sneakers are wrecked too.

If being detained wasn't bad enough, they’re probably on the phone with his mom right now, and he isn’t exactly looking forward to his folks tearing him a new one over tonight's chicken francaise. Just as he imagines the yelling match his mom and pop are gonna inevitably start the loose doorknob rattles behind him.

“Here we go,” Eddy grumbles into the collar of his long sleeve polo. He slumps down into the armchair.

The door groans on its hinges, open and then shut. Footsteps click in time as the middle aged man slowly makes his way around the office furniture and sits. All the while Eddy keeps his eyes planted on the linoleum tiles between the desk and his feet. He feigns disinterest as a manila folder and a few slips of paper are shuffled.

“So. Edward McGee…”

Eddy squints, not exactly appreciative of the pause for dramatic effect, nor the emphasis put on his last name.

“Would you care to explain why you're in my office, young man?”

“No.”

“No ‘you don’t care’? Or no ‘you can’t explain’?”

In response, Eddy crosses his arms and slouches even further into the depths of the worn leatherette, the heels of his sneakers squeaking as they skid forward. The principal sighs.

“The silent treatment won't get you very far-”

“You know what I did.”

Boy was this interrogation a bunch of bologna.

“Yes, I certainly do. I’m well aware of the damage to school property you’ve caused, not to mention the cost required to repair it. What I want to know is why.”

“Principal Howard, I didn’t-”

“We’ve already heard your excuses. This is your last chance to plead your case as to why you felt it necessary to tamper with-”

“I didn’t tamper nothin’!”

Eddy shoots to his feet, looking the principal in the face for the first time. His heart thrashes against his ribcage.

“I find that hard to believe.”

Yep. Totally pointless.

The teen and the man exchange steely glares before the elder shifts his gaze behind the younger.

“Please sit, Edward.”

Rolling his eyes, Eddy parks his keister back down, resuming his previous slouch. He watches as Principal Howard leafs through the papers on his desk. Most are a familiar shade of detention slip blue, some more faded than others. It’s a suspiciously sizable stack considering he’s only been in high school for three months. Sure, his track record hasn’t been… great. He’s never been the morning type. Missing homeroom three out of five days in a week will do that. As does skipping out on a detention here and there. Compared to junior high, though, Eddy considers himself a freakin’ angel so far. Barring today of course… just his luck.

But the slips have Eddy curious enough to raise a brow at, sitting up a bit straighter in an attempt to sneak a peek. He’s caught off guard when the name written on the top edge isn’t his own. Well, not entirely. Eddy’s muscles flex with immediate recognition, flashing a fierce look up to find the intent gaze of the older man peering down his sizable nose through his glasses.

No ‘effin way.

“You remind me of your brother.”

Eddy sputters, feeling the air rush out of his lungs. It makes it hard to speak. His brain fills with static. It makes it hard to think.

“Wha- you- you can’t-”

How’s he allowed to say that?

“Before I became principal I taught at this school for many years. Don’t think I could forget a kid like that so easily. Bright, creative, one might say underchallenged, but misguided, difficult, trouble prone. Unfortunate really. I didn’t have much control of the situation then nor the authority. But things have changed, except for the fact that I’m tasked with ensuring another McGee boy doesn’t slip through the cracks.”

“Cool headed” is an accolade foreign to Eddy. It takes every fiber of his being to bite his tongue, stopping himself from spewing expletives that will land him right back in the hot seat for the umpteenth time. More than anything he holds back to prove that he isn’t anything at all like…

“Which is why I’m requiring that you join an extracurricular student activity effective immediately.”

“WHAT!? WHY?!” Eddy finally blows his top. It’s a relief to scream.

“You need discipline, structure, responsibility, teamwork - whatever it takes to preoccupy your idle hours.”

“Believe me, Teach, the mathletes don’t need me screwin’ up their squared roots or whatever.”

“Then choose something else that interests you. D’you like sports?”

Eddy shrugs. Lately, nothing really interests him. Let alone anything school related. Not even marathons of The Ed Sullivan Show or wearing out the grooves in A-tom-ic Jones can seem to pull him out of this slump. And he sure wasn’t jumping at the opportunity to get towel-whipped by the meatheads, that's for sure. The thought of the foot smell that wafts from the locker room like a thick miasma alone makes him shudder.

Eighth grade graduation, the start of high school, and the abysmal summer between them had been a strange fog. Beyond his two best friends, Eddy avoided the other cul-de-sac kids like a plague. Oh yeah, this was cruel ironing as Double Dee put it. All that time vying to get their attention? Ever since they got front row seats to his bro’s assholery on full display, they’d been acting real nice. Too nice.

The remainder of seventh grade, after the groundings ended, was filled with an unprecedented number of invitations to movie nights, birthday parties, and sleepovers. Even though he’d sworn off the scams it somehow felt like he still needed to perform every time he made an appearance. Suddenly, everybody wanted to get to know him more. And that scared Eddy: what if there wasn’t more? He felt he hardly knew himself these days.

“You have until the end of the week to decide, so start asking around. And when you do find a team or club, I will personally speak to the coach or teacher running it to ensure that you are immediately enrolled and actively participating. Do you understand?”

The principal receives a noncommittal grunt as a response. He’s more stern the second time.

“Do you understand, Edward?”

Eddy finally gives a reluctant reply, hoping that this is the end of the conversation and he’ll be off the hook.

“Yeah. Capeech.”

“Good. Because this sort rebellious behavior will not be to-”

“And it’s Eddy.”

The balding man blinks a few times, brows twitching.

“Well, Eddy, another stunt like today and I bring your parents in. Capeech?”

Having his own phrasing thrown back at him makes Eddy feel even more patronized than he already is. Which is saying something, considering this whole freakin’ ordeal feels like it was designed by the universe or some malevolent god to humiliate him to no end.

“Yeah…”

Double doors fly open when the compact teen barrels through. He’s moving fast, on a mission, so focused on getting as much distance between himself and this stupid school that he hardly notices the two figures sitting side by side on the stone stairs anxiously awaiting his release. The leaner of the two jumps to his feet, calling out through the bothersome crack his voice has acquired thanks to puberty.

“Eddy!”

He whips around, jabbing a finger square between Double Dee’s eyes. The taller boy flinches back at the accusatory appendage.

“I aint talkin’ to you, snitch! Let’s go, Ed.”

The eldest of the bunch complies to the command, joining Eddy by his side. Edd huffs, shaking his fists, and with an indignant stomp of his sneakered foot is hot on the trail of his two friends. Seeing as there is a nasty storm cloud over Eddy’s head Ed opts to not ask too many questions. Instead he shares the exciting news:

“Double Dee and me saw two squirrels fighting over a nut while you were gone.”

“Sad story,” replies Eddy, inflection flat as a sheet of paper.

Meanwhile, the speed walking boy approaching from the rear isn’t so quick to change the subject.

“Come now! You can’t seriously think my intention was to smear your academic reputation!”

Eddy keeps stomping the pavement, hands shoved deep into his jacket pockets, and rolls his eyes in disbelief. The balls on this guy…

“Eddy, please,” Edd pleads, finally gaining, “The entire first floor was flooded. Given my proximity I responded in a manner that anyone in their right mind would. Honestly, are you suggesting I had a plethora of options?”

“Bull! Ya coulda kept your big. Mouth. Shut.” Eddy snarls through gritted teeth, shoulders tensing up to his ears.

“And be a complicit bystander? I think not,” replies Edd with a pout.

“Why do you make it out like I wanted that to happen!?” Eddy spits back, keeping his sights focused on the cracked cement.

“Who says I’m blaming you? It’s causality. You flushed an entire cafeteria tray and its contents down the toilet.”

“Ain’t my fault the lunch sucked mega balls! And why’s the school got plumbing from the Dark Ages? You saw that casserole.” He throws up two skeptical air quotes, “Would have been better off eatin’ rubber cement.”

“I think I saw it move,” Ed adds excitedly, grinning ear to ear.

Ed had eaten his serving of casserole with much relish, though, not before dunking it into his trusty thermos o’ gravy. It’s too bad that Eddy turned down the offer. The mental image of the subpar cafeteria slop alone makes both Edd and Eddy’s stomachs churn, let alone the gusto with which Ed manages to devour it.

“Yes. Well. I must say I was glad to have packed a garbanzo salad sandwich today based on the looks of things,” the teen in the beanie admits, punctuated with a nervous chuckle.

Eddy can’t help but look his friend in the face despite the stubborn front he’s working so hard to put up. Edd’s got a small smile but otherwise he looks ill at the recollection of the foul lunch offerings, his tongue peeking out through the gap as it presses against the back of his teeth. The husky boy cracks his own smile and stifles snort at his pal’s pathetic expression.

“Food so bad, even the crapper couldn’t stomach it,” Eddy throws in just for a kick.

It works - at least he and Ed chuckle over that and Edd shakes his head incredulously - burning off some of the uncomfortable tension that has been growing since the afternoon. The trio continue walking a few yards in the direction of home, lulling their arguing for just a moment to the sound of gravely footsteps, rustling leaves, and the jingle of Eddy’s wallet chain thumping against his thigh.

Sidewalks aren’t exactly wide enough to walk together in a line so it's unavoidable that every now and then, if they don’t split off into a triangle formation, that they bump shoulders. Eddy feels his shoulder nudge into Double Dee’s arm, then awkwardly clears his throat and sniffles against the chill fall air.

“I thought you weren’t talking to me,” heckles Double Dee with a pretentious sideways smirk.

Before he knows it, Eddy feels the back of his neck burning. For that alone he gives the wiry and historically uncoordinated teen a solid shove, causing him to stumble over his own two feet and step squarely into a soggy pile of street gutter leaves. The feeling of cold damp permeating through his shoe upper and soaking into his sock makes the boy yelp and shudder in disgust, a shiver running up his spine.

“Wet!” Edd wails. He shakes his sodden sneaker like a cat that's stepped in water and skips to catch up.

Of course Eddy laughs at Edd’s theatrics, very openly, which just sets Ed off to join him. Reveling in his buddy’s harmless misfortune, Ed throws an arm over Eddy’s shoulder which the shorter teen roughly shrugs off.

“Very good. I’ve received my comeuppance.” Edd sighs, wincing as his sock squelches with every other step.

A few tsks of disapproval are made by Ed seemingly out of the blue. Edd and Eddy are surprised to see their happy-go-lucky Lump looking uncharacteristically forlorn.

“How sad it must be to be a squirrel without a nut. What cruel, hostile world we must live in where there are not enough nuts to go around.” Ed punctuates the thought with a heavy sigh.

“I’m lookin’ at a nut right now.”

“Oh yeah?” Ed perks up, head whipping violently in search of it as though he can rectify the injustice he’d witnessed.

“Yeah, TWO of ‘em!“

Just as he says it, Eddy’s fist finds its way to the tall redhead’s vulnerable groin with an empty punch.

“DOH!”

Edd puts a bit of space between himself and Eddy.

“Fear not, Ed. Every squirrel has their day.”

“Good for them,” Eddy growls, his earlier gloating soured by envying, of all things, a fuzzy rat.

Seeing as his vapid positivity hasn’t exactly resonated with Eddy, Edd decides to take a more direct approach.

“So, what punishment has befallen you? Another detention.”

Eddy’s brows drop down over his eyes with a snarl. He sees a pebble a few steps ahead and when he reaches it gives it a good solid kick. It skitters wildly into the street.

“No.”

“Suspension.”

“No.”

“Disintegration?” Ed chimes in.

“I wish.”

“You’d make a fine puddle, you would.”

“Thanks, Ed,” Eddy rolls his eyes, shoving his chin down into the collar of his jacket.

He nearly jumps at the shriek-like sound of Edd’s gasp. It looks as though he’s doing a decent impression of that weird painting of the screaming guy.

“Good lord, please don’t tell me you’ve been… expelled!?” Edd can hardly say the word.

“No! Worse! I gotta join some bogus extracaricature.”

Double Dee’s hand flies, grabbing Eddy’s bicep. The sudden physical contact makes Eddy reflexively flinch.

“What a relief! You had me worried for a second.” An offended look on Eddy’s face does worry Edd and he realizes it’s because of the grasp he has on his arm. He swiftly releases it, putting his hand in his jacket pocket.

“Ah- A generously lenient outcome considering the extent of property damage. Participation in a peer activity? Hmm… Why, you could always join me on the junior debate team. What you lack in research skills you certainly make up for with your argumentative temperament.”

“Kill me already.”

Eddy sags under the weight of such a nerdy proposition.

“Oh, it wouldn’t be so bad.”

Craning his neck, Ed peers down curiously.

“Join me! We could always use a uh-” Ed pauses, counting on his fingers, “a third member on the team. You could even go by Mr. AV-Eddy.”

With a rough tug, Ed’s head snaps down to match his short-statured friend’s eye level, Eddy’s fist full of the pilling and frayed green jacket collar.

“Call me that at school and I’ll shove an 8 millimeter where the sun don’t shine.”

“Norway?”

“NO way. Don’t even try it.” Eddy threatens before letting go of Ed.

“You got it, Mr. Cool Guy I’d Never Ever Call AV-Eddy, uh, sir!”

To show his deference, Ed removes his monobrow and swears it over his heart.

They keep walking. It’s about a half hour trudge back to the cul-de-sac, but it sure beats the torment of the public school buses. Bottom of the food chain means getting the crappiest seats, or worse even, becoming completely separated. Much better to brave the biting wind for now: Eddy’s ears and nose are already ruddy. Come winter they might reassess.

It’s hard not to think he might be cursed: born with the dark mark. Maybe somewhere down his family line there was some cardinal sin committed that’s the root to all this. If he has to place bets it was probably those damn pilgrims that sold Peach Creek to the Kankers, the lot of inbred nitwits. Eddy sorta gets why his brother is the way he is. He knows deep down his parents treated him different from the jump. That he’s had it better, at least in some ways. Despite his bad luck he’s technically the lucky one. But there is still so much he doesn’t know. Stuff that when he brings it up mom just starts blubbering. He won’t even bring it up with dad. So teachers thought he was smart?

Over the last year, Double Dee has fretted over Eddy’s drawn out silences. Just like the one now. He can’t help but read far too deeply into whatever might preoccupy Eddy’s mind so much to leave him speechless. A more contemplative and reflective streak could be good for Eddy. Except Double Dee knows from personal experience how quickly things can go south inside the echo chamber of one’s own thoughts. He chews his lip as the worry gnaws away at him.

“Eddy? Was there… anything else you wanted to talk about?”

Eddy sniffs his running nose again, scowling. He shrugs.

“S’nothing. Everyone at this school’s got it out for me.”

The feeling of a gentle hand between his shoulder blades makes the back of his eyes burn. Dammit. He blinks hard, sniffing even harder.

“Not everyone.” Double Dee earnestly assures. Ed wraps another arm around him in a lax half hug and this time Eddy doesn’t shrug him off. Instead, he leans in.

“Okay, okay. Fine. Almost everyone.”

And that’s good enough for him.

#eene #ed edd n eddy #lasagnawords

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violetsiren90 · 7 months

Note

The reason why I never rush people into replying to messages back... Is because I know everyone would have their own lives away from social media. People have their family, friends, jobs and anything else I'm able to think of at the moment. So that's my reason.

Yes! At least I'm gonna attempt to.. One reason why I stopped was because I'm way too perfectionistic, I am too critical of my own work. So I'm attempting it again. Hopefully try to be less critical of my works.

Don't get me wrong! I'm not trying to be rude. And.. I know. It seems like I'm being rude, but I am trying, in my own way, to not be seemingly rude if it comes across that way. I'm just trying to explain this to any person who might be curious about this topic, is all.

Like I know people prefer inclusive characters when reading stories. Though, sometimes, there could be certain details in the descriptions that won't always the person reading about that character. No fault to the writers. So I don't want you to think that I blame readers for some things they have no knowledge of.

Which might be all the more reasons to write about characters that aren't always written, especially any characters that aren't written well too. Because that tends to happen a lot when it comes to characters.

Ranging from appearances, traits, even disabilities.. Some people may be curious to read those types of characters. Or even have more representations too.

And I wasn't trying to sexualize my explanation! I've just tried explaining in a way where it is much easier to visual? Like if I really stood near men that tall, my full height does reach around to their stomach (and abdomen for some). I'm just basically half their size.

I'm not invalidated about myself. Because I actually know the differences between asking the questions about my height that people are curious about, and the vulgar comments they'd make about my height. Usually the guys who make vulgar comments about my size, well, they stop thinking it's funny whenever I hit them in the balls. I think it's a fair trade. At least in my opinion anyway. And the children, children do love being taller than an adult for once in their lives.

Exactly! If I ever see more duality pictures and even videos of the BTS guys, I'll definitely send the links.

Yes. I have a lot of stories to read (or reread), and I'll have to search your masterlist for more stories too.

I've been neglecting way too many hobbies lately.

Which reminds me... Obviously these ideas aren't all that original, not that I'd complain. What's your own opinion about mafia alternate universes? And also a supernatural universe? Like the seven deadly sins is another possible concept. Definitely have to write a mafia story, or many stories in general, because I've always enjoyed the mafia concept in media. Stories to shows and movies. So I'm attached to that idea.

Maybe? I should.. I should have some alias as anon, at least until I'm comfortable to reveal myself. Not a huge reveal, not like that. I'm just socially awkward.

Ah, I completely understand the woes of perfectionism! When I first started publishing my work, I had to just press the post button at times, before even conducting more in-depth edits for fear that I would chicken out due to self-criticism. So, I understand the struggle. It helped me to remember that what I'm doing is for fun and for free!

No, you weren't being rude at all! And you didn't come off that way either. 😊💕

Yep, bringing your own perspective and experiences to characters can be one of the great joys of writing.

Your explanation made perfect sense! Obviously, the dynamic of height and size is going to affect lots of aspects of physical interactions between characters, in smut scenes too!

Well, I'm certainly glad that you don't let those kinds of remarks get to you. Whatever those guys got, they had coming! 😂

I don't have very much on my masterlist quite yet, as I'm still a budding writer here on Tumblr, but I would be honored if you chose to read any of my stories!

I like mafia AU's! Though I've only read a couple. I'm pretty open to any type of AU. If it's well written, chances are I'm going to enjoy it! Writing a mafia story would probably be a lot of fun, especially getting into the weeds of that kind of world and reimagining members as different kinds of character types within it!

You're welcome to choose any emoji or alias you'd like! It will be helpful in keeping track to remember who I'm chatting with. 😊 And this is a safe space, you're free to remain anon for as long as you like, or introduce yourself more personally if you decided to! Either way, I'm happy to have you here. 💜

#mermail💌#anon asks

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strawberrysodaslut · 2 years

Note

tasm!peter parker x fem reader enemies/rivals to lovers? maybe with some smut at the end?

My Rival - Peter Parker x Fem!Reader

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❛ ━━━━━━━━･❪ ❁ ❫･━━━━━━━━━ ❜

[ main masterlist ]

[ peter parker masterlist ]

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all of my smut and other nsfw posts are 18+

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word count: 2k

warnings: smutty smut, fingering, titty worship, unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it) rivals to lovers, peter being a softie

summary: you and peter had been bitter rivals for years, but when your respective families grow sick of your bickering and send the two of you on a camping trip, you discover where that resentment really comes from

a/n: loved this request, it fit really well with day 4 of my writing challenge! this is also the second story i’ve written today so i’m feeling super proud of myself.

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Peter Parker was a lot of things.

He was smart, a good photographer, and top of his class in nearly everything, but there was something only you seemed to see when it came to him.

Peter Parker, was a pain in the ass.

It wasn't that he'd show off in class, you do that too- though mainly to shut him up, it was the way he would do it; like he was smarter than everyone else.

His smug, 'holier than thou' attitude really pissed you off. And you were sure to make him know it.

Peter wasn’t shy when it came to hating you either, rolling his eyes when you answered a question and snickering when you got it wrong. Muttering insults across the room until you snapped and winded up in detention for ‘strong language’.

He’d hated you since you were in third grade, always finding a way to push your buttons. Whether it came to your looks, your intelligence, and when he got older, your body and sex life, quickly learning that would drive you off of the edge.

Your teachers, friends and even your parents were sick of your constant bickering with Peter, so, your folks and Peter's aunt came to an agreement. They would send the two of you on a camping trip.

Of course, you didn't know Peter would be there until you got to the site.

"What the hell are you doing here Parker?" You asked, walking out of your car to where he was setting up his tent. "This is our campsite."

He looks up at you, an annoyed expression clouding his face, "Our?" He asks, gesturing to your parent's car that was now driving away from you.

You tried to chase after the car, but it was no use. You scoffed, walking away from Peter to have a less than friendly conversation with your parents.

After half an hour of you arguing, cursing, and begging your parents to come back and get you away from Peter, you finally gave up. Walking back to the site to see Peter on the phone- presumably with his aunt.

"Look just-" he stops when he sees you, "come pick me up, or her, I don't care just..." he pauses, "yes she's here... no she can't hear you."

For the next couple of minutes, you can vaguely hear Peter's aunt tell him off, him adding an "okay" or a "yep" every couple of minutes. Eventually, he says goodbye and hangs up the phone, turning to you.

"Looks like our families set us up." He said, smacking his lip together and returning to the mess of a tent he was trying to make.

You decide to stop bitching and help, you need a place to sleep tonight. You sit next to him, helping him figure out how to set up the tent. Once you're done, you grab your duffle bag, shoving it into the completed tent and sitting in one of the two camp chairs.

Peter sits in the other, pulling two packets of noodles out of his backpack. “You hungry?” He asks, waving the noodles around.

You almost let a smile slip, but you nod, “What flavour are they?” You ask, leaning forward to get a closer look.

Peter tosses the packets at you, “Just chicken noodles.” He replies, standing up. “I’m gonna get some firewood, you need anything?” He asks, his voice showing he had to force himself to be even somewhat nice to you.

You don’t give him the same honour, “From you? No.” You say, rolling your eyes.

His eyes darken, “God your so fuckin-“ He closes his mouth, pausing to think, and walks away.

Huh, you thought, he can shut up.

The rest of the night was no less than awkward, you didn’t speak once, barring a quick thank you as he passed you your bowl of noodles.

You had packed marshmallows, so you brought them out for the two of you to enjoy. But not even the fluffy

You felt the pit in your stomach as the silence filled you with anxiety, so you decided to excuse yourself, “I’m gonna get changed,” you muttered, heading into the tent.

Once you were changed, you didn’t feel like going back to the fire, opting to try and sleep early so this waste of a camping trip could be over.

You laid in your sleeping bag, completely unable to fall asleep, of course, you couldn’t- it wasn’t past 8:30. But determined to keep away from the awkwardness, you still tried to fall asleep.

After a couple of hours, Peter enters the tent, “You alright?” He asked, looking at you eerily as he takes off his jacket and t-shirt, replacing them with a sweatshirt. He decides to keep the same sweatpants on, climbing over you to hop in his seeping bad.

You nod, “Yeah, just tired.”

He snickers, “tired of being annoying?” He stretches out, his sweatshirt riding up to show the bottom of his stomach, you can’t help but bite your lip.

“Something like that,” you say, not wanting to get into another fight.

He doesn’t seem to get the point, “What? You’re being silent? How will you piss me off?” He says, rolling towards you.

You bite your lip, pissed off but too exhausted to filter your thoughts. “What the fuck is your problem?” You asked.

He furrowed his eyebrows, “What?” He says, sitting back.

You followed, sitting up, “What’s your problem with me? Why do you hate me so much?”

His eyes darken, “I’m going to sleep,” He rolls over.

You slip out of your beanbag, determined to get an answer, or at least to piss him off. “No, tell me. Why are you so obsessed with hating me? What did I do to you? What in gods name could-“

You were cut off by Peter rolling over, grabbing your face and pushing his lips against yours. Against your better judgement, you immediately reciprocate.

He runs his hands through your hair and tugs, causing you to moan into his mouth. He uses your open mouth to push his tongue into your mouth, immediately dominating the kiss.

You grab at his sweatshirt, trying to pull it off of him. He groans, helping you shed the fabric off of himself. Immediately pulling your t-shirt off of your body and pushing you onto your back.

He takes in the sight of your breasts, “fuck…” he mutters, reaching down to pull your sweatpants off.

You pull him back to you as he kicks off his own sweatpants, leaning down to kiss you. He cups your cunt through your panties, causing you to moan in his mouth.

He can feel the wet spot on your underwear, he smirks into the kiss. “So fucking wet, I haven’t even touched you yet.” He pushes your underwear to the side, dipping his finger through your slit, collecting slick. “Don’t worry, I’ll fix that pup.”

Peter pushes two fingers into you and curling them, you moan, burying your face into his neck and biting down to suck a bruise. He groans, moving his thumb to rub at your clit.

You moan again, bucking your hips into his fingers. He continues to fuck you with his fingers at a ravenous pace, trying to memorise every part of your cunt.

He finally hits your sweet spot, you gasp, gripping onto the hand inside you with your own hand. “There’s our girl…” He mutters, leaning down mouth at your breast.

You moan at the triple stimulation, your high washing over you like a tidal wave. The coil in your stomach snaps the second it appears, your cunt clamping down on his fingers as you cum.

Peter’s hand fucks you through the overstimulation, finally pulling his fingers out of you.

He smirks, “I think that’s the best sound you’ve ever made, finally able to say something without pissing me off” He mutters, kissing the corner of your lip.

You’re still mewling, coming down from your high when he moves back to your lips, lazily making out with you.

You press your hand to his face, rolling your hips up into his. He lets out a grunt, grinding your hips to meet your rolls, you moan into his mouth.

Slowly, he dips his hand into your waistband and pulling down your panties, moving to also take off his boxers.

You find it hard not to stare at his cock, its length is… intimidating, to say the least. He notices your nerves, moving to give you a surprisingly soft kiss.

“Relax baby…” he whispers, “this still okay?”

You nod, pressing a chaste kiss to his lips. “I do… I really do.” You say, but your nerves don’t leave your face.

He smiles, “How about this.” He lines his cock up, dragging it through your slick before pushing his shaft flat between your pussylips.

You whine, gripping onto his shoulders as he grinds his cock against you. A moan slips out of you as you roll your hips against his.

“Fuck…” He moans, leaning down to mouth at your breast once again. Biting your nipple before kissing it to soothe. He moves up to kiss your mouth, lazily making out with you.

Although the two of you are moving slow, you can feel the heat in your abdomen building up, the coil turning, ready to snap.

“Pete…” You moan out.

He moves his kisses to your cheek, then down your jaw. “Cum for me baby,” He whispers. Rolling his hips further into you.

The wave rolls over you, instead of the hot, rushing high you hit earlier, this one is calming. All of your muscles seem to relax as Peter coaxes you through your high.

Peter looks down on you as you come back from your orgasm, pressing a chaste kiss on your lips. “That was so fucking hot, you’re so hot.”

He moves his cock, using the arousal you just coated him with as lubrication, he lines up with your entrance, pressing another kiss to your lips. “Ready?” He asks.

You nod, bucking your hips to try to catch his tip in your entrance. He tuts, moving the hair out of your face and slowly pushes in.

His mouth forms an ‘o’ shape, “Fuckk, baby you’re so tight.” He moans, checking to see if you’re okay before bottoming out.

You let out a loud moan, pattering your hand around to find him, once you do, you grip tight. “You okay?” he asks. You nod, rolling your hips into his to encourage him to move.

He gets the message, pulling out so his tip barely grazes your entrance and fully thrusting back in. You let out a loud moan, gripping your free hand into his hair.

Peter finds a steady pace, his thrusts rough and fast as he sucks numerous amounts of hickeys to your neck and chest, pressing a soothing kiss into each of them before moving to make a new one.

He thrusts strangely, like he’s searching for your sweet spot, when he finds it your eyes roll to the back of your head, your pussy clamping down onto his cock. He repeats the motion until you’re a whimpering, moaning mess.

You feel that familiar pool in your abdomen pushing you towards your high. In no time Peter has you clenching down, practically screaming as you fall into your third high of the night. Peter is quick to follow, spilling his seed into you.

The two of you breathlessly come down from your highs. Collapsed against each other, pressing your foreheads together.

“Fuck…” he moans, pressing for a chaste kiss, “Guess our parents will be happy” He laughs

You giggle, “I’d be down to pretend to still hate you.” You say, playing with his now messy hair.

He chuckles, “Yeah, make ‘em believe they have to keep sending us on these trips.”

You smile, pulling him down for another kiss, he immediately reciprocates, pushing his tongue into your mouth.

He rolled the two of you over, manoeuvring the two of you into the sleeping bag, “Goodnight.” He whispers, slowly falling to sleep.

As you watch him sleep you think to yourself, maybe Peter Parker isn’t that bad after all.

❛ ━━━━━━━━･❪ ❁ ❫･━━━━━━━━━ ❜

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celestialking · 3 years

Text

Southern charm

◇ NSFW~ 18+ only ◇ Minors/Ageless blogs DNI◇ You will be blocked ◇

Word count: 3k

Warnings: spitting, dacryphillia, degrading, afab, lewd pictures/video taking, double pen. (Vag.), size (stomach bulge), sight choking, squirting, video call, mentions of exhibition(?) or the other one, ft Dream in a tiny scene, implied breeding mentions (?), spanking, slight cumplay, slight humiliation, slight dumbification

"Howdy (y/n)!" A voice exclaimed.

You set the bucket of feed you were carrying down on the path. Sapnap, your neighbor down the way, had rode up with his horse.

"Hey there Sapnap," you pulled the brim of your hat down to cover from the sun. "What brings you here?" his horse slowly trotted forwards.

"Wanted to see your new horse pen. The one for the kiddos this festival?" he hummed.

You grinned picking up the feed bucket once more. "Sure, just accompany me to the chicken house and I'll take you right over,"

Sapnap nodded and followed behind. He watched you feed the chickens, hang up the bucket on the fence post for now, and offered you his hand. "It'll be faster this way," you accepted his hand and moved behind him.

Your arms wrapped around his torso. His horse moved skittish, not used to you being this close to it. Sapnap hushed it softly, petting its mane.

"It's just on the side of the house, under the big trees," his horse took off fast, your gripped tighter afraid you might fall. "New horse?" You asked over the wind rushing past.

"Yep!" Sap hollered back. "Got 'er yesterday," you chuckled.

"No need to yell, I'm right here," his cheeks flushed, embarrassed.

"Sorry," he pulled on the reins as the pen came into view.

The horse came to a walk before stopping. With his help you slipped off the back of the horse. "We still have to get the part in the middle secured so the kids can ride the horses without them wandering off," you said opening the gate. Sapnap brought his horse in troting around. "Lotta room, you using the big ones instead of the minis this year?" You smiled. "Yup, thought the big horses could use the chance to see the kids. Besides I was going to dress up one as a unicorn to ride to the rodeo," Sapnap suddenly snapped his fingers making you look at him. "Im gonna join this year," you looked at him puzzled.

"The rodeo? Sap you've never joined and the rodeo is in three days," he just stated blankly at you before shrugging.

"So? I could win," you shook your head, chuckling.

"Yeah okay, good luck with that," you snorted, turning to get back to your chores. Some of the horses needed to be groomed and fed still.

"Wait can you help me?" You sighed attempting to look up at the sun. It was almost noon, you could possibly spare a few hours. "I need some help on calf roping,"

"Okay...I guess you could borrow one of the calves for a few minutes," you turned back to the gate but before you could leave he shouted no. You glanced back at Sapnap.

"I'm gonna lasso you," you raised an eyebrow.

"Pardon?" He coughed, pulling his lasso off his belt.

"I mean I'm going to practice with a non-moving target first," you put your hands on your hips.

"You haven't practiced on a calf? The thing you'll be expected to catch?" You asked dumbfounded.

Sapnap reached up to the back of his neck, scratching nervously. "Look (y/n) let me just practice on a non-moving target first,"

You sighed. "Go for it," he waited for you to give the signal before riding the horse forwards, the lasso flew in the air falling around your torso. Sap flew off the horse, tying your wrists together. You both stared at each other.

"Pretty fast huh?" He said.

"You haven't practiced on a calf yet have you?"

"I have not practiced on a calf yet," he replied smiling.

You sighed lifting your wrists. "Alright, undo," he slipped it off your wrists. Sapnap looked down at you it seemed like he was about to say something. The sound of truck pulling into your driveway cut you off. "I recognize that ride anywhere," you grinned.

Punz stepped out of the driver's seat. You jogged over leaving Sapnap in the pen.

"Hey (y/n)," he grinned. "I just came to see if you need any help,"

You didn't see Sapnap walk up behind you glaring at the blonde. "Thats what I was here doing too," Sapnap said from behind you. You glanced back at him.

"You were?" No response. You turned back to Punz.

"Sure looked like it," he snorted.

"Keep practicing for that rodeo, I'm sure you'll be able to enter in a few decades at this rate," Punz said.

The air was heavy with tension. Punz was well known for winning the rodeo a few years in a row. He and Dream had equal winnings. You clapped your hands together drawing their attention towards you.

"Well I'm not sure I need any help but you both are welcome to stay for lunch," Punz smiled down at you. "How could I turn down such a sweet offer," his arm wrapped around your shoulder leading you into the house. The glare he sent back to Sapnap going unnoticed. They both settled in pretty fast to your home.

Both men watching as you pulled together some sandwiches. "I have lemonade if you guys are interested," you shouted back. You heard some shuffling around, assuming they had gotten up for a drink. Suddenly a body was pressed up against yours, pinning your hips against the counter. "Pardon me," Sapnap's low voice caused shivers. You felt his breath on the back of your neck. He grabbed a cup from your cabinet and moved to pour himself some lemonade. Your cheeks burned. Sapnap pretended not to notice the way your thighs shifted together. He leaned back against the sink, sipping the cool beverage slowly.

His dark eyes following as you left the kitchen with a tray of sandwiches and sides. You set the food on the table, a hand touched your shoulder slowly sliding down to your waist. Punz spoke from behind you. "Thanks gorgeous," you all ate lunch, you trying to ignore the slick that had gathered between your legs from the two men. Or at least you attempted to eat but were too nervous. Punz retired to the couch while you and Sapnap cleaned up from lunch. "Thanks doll for the meal," you turned to look at him. "You're welcome," your breath stuttered as you caught his eyes looking you up and down, practically undressing you with his eyes.

He surely wasn't being shy about the fact that he wanted you. You blushed before moving out of the kitchen. You were so flustered you ended up tripping, landing on your knees. Your hand caught on his knees. You stared up at him, mouth opening and closing shocked. Punz looked cocky, arm thrown up on the side of the chair. "You wanna have some real fun?" You nodded your head slowly. He leaned down capturing your lips in a kiss. It was hot and heavy. His tongue slipping into your mouth, hand in your hair.

When you pulled away you panted out

"what about Sapnap?"

"Don't worry about me darlin, carry on," the texan in question smirked.

You watched him settle down in one of the chairs, an obvious bulge in his jeans. Sapnap's smirk deepened when he saw your stare.

"Go ahead angel, what're you waiting for?" He chuckled. The hand in your hair tightened.

"You heard him, let's give him a show," Punz whispered darkly.

Slowly your fingers moved to undo his belt, unzipping his jeans, and pulling his cock out. Somehow a bit of precum splashed against your cheek and nose. "Don't," Punz said as moved to wipe it off. You obeyed and slowly began pumping your hand up and down.

"Mm as much as I love handjobs, I wanna feel those pretty lips of yours around me," Punz groaned, his thumb brushing over your bottom lip.

He couldn't wait to see them swollen and bruised. Slowly you opened your mouth, licking a line up his cock. Before he could complain about your speed, he moaned feeling you finally take the tip into the wet heat of your mouth.

Sapnap watched the show in front of him, taking out his own cock to pump it slowly. Punz had his head thrown back, thighs quivering as you worked literal magic on him. Your mouth must feel like heaven. God Sapnap wanted that to be him right now.

You relaxed taking Punz deeper until your nose pressed up against him. He choked on a groan, hips bucking up against you. The hand that had been in your hair had been relaxed until now. His grip tightened and Punz took over the speed, his hips coming up to fuck your throat. The tip rammed against the back, the taste of his precum on your tongue. Punz watched as your eyes glossed over, tears ready to appear. Sapnap had moved next to you guys.

"I want a turn," he grumbled.

Punz let you pull off. Both looking at the saliva the dripped down your chin. You moved taking Sapnap into your mouth. His hand moved to your hair, slowly fucking your throat. Your hand continued its job on Punz, his hips bucking up into your hand. You continued like this until Punz gasped out "c-cumming," Sapnap pushed your head onto him. You whined feeling Punz release into your mouth.

"Let me see doll," you looked up at Sapnap, sticking your tongue out. You hadn't swallowed, a bit dripped out and onto your thighs. Sapnap held his phone above you, taking a picture. "You look so good like this, what a messy little whore," Sapnap grit his teeth. "Gonna cum all over that pretty little face of yours," he jacked himself off, until he saw ropes of his cum cover your face.

He tapped the tip on your tongue before snapping another picture. You pulled your shirt off wiping some of the mess on it. You squirmed around, feeling that you had soaked through your underwear.

"Come here," Punz patted his thigh.

He pulled you up, so you sat with your back against his chest. "Look at that, you dirty slut, did giving a blow job really turn you on that much?" Sapnap chided playfully, pushing apart your thighs. A dark wet spot on your shorts.

With the help of Punz they had your bottoms off in no time. His fingers spread the apart, blowing air on your sensitive clit. You whined in response. Just as Sapnap's tongue dipped into you Punz's hands moved to your chest, his face in the crook of your neck.

Your hands buried one in each of the boys hair. You tugged Sapnap's raven hair closer whimpering at the nails that sunk into your thighs. Wet noises that made you want to close your thighs came from his tongue as he lapped at you.

A hand gripped Punz tightly. His tongue tracing your skin before biting down harshly. He began leaving his claim on your neck leaving it bloody and bruised. His fingers twisted and pulled at your nipples. Both men enjoying the way you moaned and repeated their names like prayers. Sapnap pulled away for a moment.

"Already fucked dumb," he teased.

"Please, please," you whimpered trying to pull him back.

Sapnap chuckled in response before beginning to tongue fuck you, his hands keeping your thighs open.

The pressure was overwhelming, your head dizzy, you could feel their hands everywhere. While enemies at first sight they worked very well together. You made eyes contact with sapnap through his lashes just as the pressure in your stomach snapped. He eagerly lapped up your release making you whine from overstimulation. He pulled back, slick covering his chin. Sapnap grinned, showing off his sharp smile.

While they worked in harmony before now came the argument of who got to fuck you first.

"Boys," you snapped after a while. "I have multiple holes just fuck me," you demanded.

"With pleasure," Punz purred. He moved you off of him, and began stripping his clothes off, Sapnap mirroring his action. Punz moved to where he was laying down on the fluffy rug on the ground. None of you wanted to move upstairs.

"Come ride me," his fingers curled at you. You moved to position yourself over Punz. You let him bring you down onto his cock, moaning as he filled you up. Sapnap stood next to you claiming your mouth again.

"I'm gonna ruin you sweetheart," Punz muttered.

His hips bucking up hard, the air being punched out of your lungs. Sapnap pulled out letting your sounds be heard. Punz slowed down to a stop as Sapnap pushed you down. You let it happen slightly confused, until you felt the tip of his cock nudge your entrance where Punz already had you filled.

"You're not gonna fit," you gasped as he began to push in. Sapnap kept moving until he bottomed out, taking his time. Your nails stuck into Punz's shoulders leaving cresent shaped marks. He hissed at the pain.

"Oh fuck, oh fuck," you gasped out.

You'd never felt more full than that moment. All three of you waited, relishing the extreme pleasure mixed with a bit of pain. Sapnap slowly thrusted in and out, one of his hands moving your ass cheek to get a better view of him and Punz opening you up. You heard a phone start recording. A sudden harsh thrust from Sapnap had you crying out. You heard his phone get tossed to the side.

"I hope you don't mind if I show all those to Dream," he hummed in your ear.

Both of the men collectively groaning as you clenched down on them. The thought of Dream seeing you like that fueled a little fire in you. Would he look at you the same after seeing your face covered in his best friends cum, pupils blown wide with lust? If he still did he surely wouldn't after seeing you take both of their cocks in one hole. "She loves that idea," Punz groaned, hip bucking up. They now were both thrusting into you. Moaning at the feeling of your velvety walls tight around them, and the feeling of their other's cocks brushing against another.

"God you're needy angel," Sapnap grunted, slamming a hand down on your ass cheek.

"Bet you'd love it if Dream was here too, fucking your throat," another slap. His hand rubbed over the red mark, before smacking again hoping to back it permanent.

The grip punz had on your hips was tight, brushing you with his fingers. He listened to you fall apart, whimpering and moaning just for them. Every smack Sapnap gave had you clenching down on them. Suddenly their pace sped up, slamming into you. Without warning you came, nails digging into Punz's shoulder.

You had been fucked dumb. No more than babbles and noises of pleasure fell from your lips. Sapnap's hand threaded into your hair pulling your head back, once you were up it moved to your throat.

One of Punz's hands moved to your chest to tweak one of the sensitive nubs. Tears had started streaming down your cheeks.

"God," Punz grunted. "You look so fucking hot right now," his eyes trailed down to your stomach where he could see a big bulge from the two of them in their. "Oh f-fuck," he moaned. That was it. His cock twitched inside of you, his thrusts stilling as he filled you up.

Sapnap continued moving, hips slamming against yours. "Gonna cum too, fill you up so nice and pretty," you whined at his words, his fingers tightening on your throat.

"Don't spill a drop, unless you like looking like a whore, hm? Do you like that? Being mine and Punz's filthy little bitch," Sapnap growled.

You cried out unable to put a sentence together. He slowed for a second before spitting on your back.

The liquid trailing down to your ass, over where his cock pistoned into you. He dropped you back into Punz pushing his hand into your lower back. Finally Sapnap moaned lowly as he released, painting your walls white.

You trembled from the warmth of their cum. Punz and Sapnap slowly both pulled out, you whimpered having being so close to another orgasm. A wave of cum trailing down your thighs. Punz moved out from underneath you, Sapnap holding your hips up for him to see the creamy white mess they had made of you.

Punz scooped up some of the cum with his fingers, fucking it back into you. You whimpered, the slow movements being enough to make you squirt on Punz's fingers.

You slumped down, thighs twitching.

They stared at the mess of spit, sweat, tears, and cum you had been turned into. A blush ran down to your shoulders. Sapnap's phone stated ringing. A video call. He leaned over grabbing it.

"What's up Dream?"

"Dude where have you been? I-" the rest of his voice turned into a mumble before you felt Sapnap's hand on your thigh.

"Can i show him?"

Your voice was weak and cracked "Sure,"

Punz had moved to get you water and a towel. You knew the second Dream had seen the mess of you. Sapnap's fingers showed Dream the cum spilling from you. You felt a glob drip out from him spreading you open. There was a sharp intake of breath on the other line.

Sapnap chuckled watching the taller man shift in his current seat. "I'm sure she wouldn't mind if you tagged along next time, right angel?"

Reminder: DNI = Do Not Interact

If you are a Minor/Ageless blog, Do not follow. Do not comment. Do not reblog. Do not like. DO NOT INTERACT.

Either add your age to your bio/pinned, message me in private, or DNI.

#celestial:scribbles #celestial:spnp #celestial:pnz

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reidgraygubler · 3 years

Text

Spoonful of Sugar (spencer reid/reader)

Title: spoonful of sugar

Request: yes! (a super fluffy spence x reader one shot in which she's sick with the flu, a high fever or something similiar, so he has to take care of her. Usually i'm not that super whiny and wouldn't request things like that buuut i'm in a desperate need for spence to take care of me while i'm ill and home alone.)

Couple: Spencer Reid/gen-neutral!reader

Category: fluff

Content Warning: spencer’s pov, anxiety about an ill partner, none that I can think of. If something does need to be tagged, please message me

Word Count: 1,638

Summary: Spencer stays home from work to take care of his partner, who’s sick with the flu

A/N: sorry this took so long to get posted. i forgot I had it written and it was just sitting in my drafts. it is a little on the shorter side... thank you all so much for the support! i really do appreciate it. check out my masterlist!

{***}{***}{***}

The person who usually slept beside me did not sleep last night. I only know that because whenever they tossed and turned, it’d wake me up. But also, they kept stealing all the blankets from me. Whenever I tried to take them back, they’d wake up and steal them again. Or they’d be suddenly up in a coughing fit. And then, they finally fell asleep around the time I had to get out of bed for work. Leaving me with another restless night of sleep. I was used to it at this point, but not because of them.

When I left the bedroom, I made sure to be as quiet as possible. I didn’t want to be the reason why they woke up for the day. Clearly something was on their mind and keeping them up. I also made sure they had all of the blankets on their body. While I did that, I sneakily rested my hand on their forehead, and the back of their neck, just to check their temperature.

They were on fire. I’d never felt someone as hot as that in a very long time. It would explain why they got no sleep and kept waking up, and stealing the blankets. They’d need to get medicine and fluids in them, and quickly. But I’ll do that when I’m finished getting ready. They just fell asleep and I’d rather them sleep off their fever.

So that’s what I did. I quickly got ready for work, doing all the necessary things I had to do. I wanted to make sure my person had everything they needed before I left for work.

Which meant a quick stop at the market down the street. The market had their favorite soup, juice, and snacks. If I was going to go into work today, I needed to make sure they had everything they needed before I left for the day. And if they wanted me to stay, I’d do that for them.

“Hey Emily, I’m going to be late to the office today,” I said into my phone as I grabbed a basket. The store had several people, just enough for me to be cautious of where I was going. And it pressured me to be even quicker inside.

“Oh! Of course! Is everything okay?” Emily asked, the concern in her tone sounding genuine. I sighed before nodding.

“Yeah, just... Just need to take care of someone who’s sick,” I explained as I grabbed a bottle of orange juice.

“Take all the time you need! We got everything covered here.”

“Thank you so much.”

“Of course, call me if you need anything!” She proclaimed before bidding farewell. I sighed deeply before pocketing my phone and headed towards the deli to get some soup. They always gave me chicken noodle, with the good thick egg noodles. Since they also enjoyed White Chicken Chill, I got that for them, too. Anything to make them feel better sooner.

Once I got both soups, enough juice for a small household, and plenty of healthy snacks, I made the trek back home. Whether they enjoyed the things I got them or not, I knew they’d enjoy the thought. Because that’s all that matters, right? The thought?

When I got home, I prepared the chicken noodle in a bowl, and grabbed a bottle of juice with electrolytes, and brought it to the bedroom. They were still asleep, however slightly stirring. Instead of just leaving right away, I waited a moment for them to wake up.

“My head is pounding,” they groaned as they brought a hand to rest on their forehead. “Like I drank a fifth of whiskey,” they added. I held back my chuckle and sat on the edge of the bed.

“You’re hot.”

“Thanks so are you,” they blew me a kiss. I rolled my eyes before shaking my head.

“You have a fever, Dear,” I corrected as I handed them the bottle of juice. “I got you soup, juice, and healthy snacks.”

“You’re too kind, Spencer,” they hummed as they struggled to open the bottle. I watched as they sighed and handed the bottle over to me. I smiled as I cracked the bottle open.

“I have to go in, but if you want me to stay I can.” I handed the bottle back to them. They smiled brightly before taking a big sip of the juice.

“No, no, you’re the breadmaker here. You’d be no use to me here.”

“I can help you,” I breathed out a laugh. They lazily smiled before shrugging. “I’m gonna get you medicine.”

“If you don’t come back with Day and Nyquil, don’t come back at all,” they teased. I laughed as I looked back at them.

“Eat your soup, I’m getting you medicine,” I repeated as I pointed at the bowl of chicken noodle on the nightstand. They glared at me before picking up the bowl. I was quick, grabbing the medicine they asked for and a bottle of Aleve.

“Do you need anything else?” I looked down at them as I placed the bottles on the nightstand. They shook their head as they looked back at me, watching as I sat back down beside them.

“I’m all good here.”

“I can stay if you need me to,” I whispered as I looked over at them. They looked away from the bowl of soup with wide eyes. “Surely Emily won’t care. Family first.”

“As much as I’d love for you to stay, Spence, they need you just as badly there,” my person slurred their words. I could only imagine just how congested their sinuses and how blocked their nasal passages were. Which would only cause a migraine. “Besides, I don’t want to get you sick. You’re a baby when you’re sick.” They smirked at me.

“Am not!” I exclaimed as I looked at them. They shrugged before rubbing the underside of their nose. Should have grabbed them tissues while I was at the store. “Seriously, I’ll stay.”

“Seriously, go to work.”

“If I didn’t know any better it sounds to me like you’re trying to get rid of me.”

“I am,” they mumbled as they blew softly onto their spoonful of soup. I rolled my eyes before standing up off the bed.

“Okay, okay, I’ll go.” I lifted my hands as a sign of surrender. They looked up at me with a soft smile. “Good to know you can get rid of me so easily.”

“I’ll call you if I need anything.” They placed the soup back on the nightstand before shifting down the bed.

“And I’ll let Emily know I’ll be on desk duty.”

“Spencer,” they warned.

“I’m going! I’m going! Gone! See! Gone!”

“Love you!”

“Love you, too!”

I should have stayed home.

{***}{***}{***}

Okay, maybe Spencer should have stayed home because… I really miss him. I thought I’d be fine if he went in, and I’d get by… But I really want him. God I’m never whiny and asking for things, and the only thing I want… I sent it away.

I could call him… He’d drop everything and come right over. But… He should work. There is a reason why I sent him to work. That was where he was most needed. What if I was wrong though? What if he was most needed here, with me? No, no he’s the brain of the BAU.

But it’d be really nice if he stayed home with me.

Yeah, I made a mistake sending him to work. I’ve never felt so clingy in my entire life. Damn my stupid clinginess.

Did he know I was thinking about him? I must’ve, because he was calling me. Probably just checking in on me. I could ask him to come home. Unless he’s in the middle of helping a case and can’t come home.

“How are you feeling?” Yep, just calling to see how I was doing. It was probably a good thing that he was calling me. He probably just knew I wasn’t feeling any better.

“Could be better,” I paused as I looked over at his side of the bed. It was made but a little tousled around because of my sleeping. “Kinda wish you stayed here,” I whispered, mostly to myself.

“Already on the way home,” he stated like it was no big deal.

“Really?” I asked, feeling a little bit of excitement in my tone. Surely it just sounded like I was stuffy to Spencer. He laughed.

“Finished early. And… Emily noticed I was too distracted thinking about you. I’m about halfway there, do you need anything?”

“You… To get here quickly and give me all the cuddles in the world,” I dramatically sighed as I curled in on my side. “But… Safely!” I quickly added.

“I will be there soon, Dear,” Spencer mused before chuckling lightly. “Do you need anything?”

“No, I should be okay.”

“I’ll be home soon."

“Okay, bye,” I whispered before hanging up. I tossed my phone into the empty space beside me before curling back onto my side. Now that I knew Spencer would be home any minute, maybe I could sleep. Or maybe I should stay awake and wait for him.

Whatever, it didn’t matter. I must have fallen asleep, because the next thing I knew, Spencer was crawling into bed beside me and I was slowly waking up.

“Shh, go back to sleep,” he whispered as he pulled the blanket back over me. Although it felt like I was on fire, the blanket felt safe over me. Or maybe that was Spencer’s arms wrapped around me that made me feel safe.

“No, no,” I mumbled as I moved as close as possible to him. Spencer laughed lightly before pressing his lips to my forehead. “Don’t leave me again,” I whispered into his chest.

“I’m not going anywhere.”

{***}{***}{***}

if you have any comments/questions about this part, let me know here! please consider reblogging or leaving a comment if you’re a part of the taglist. it’s so much work tagging everyone.

not able to tag: @isabellasimps

@thebluetint @mggsprettygirl @muffin-cup @misshale21 @spenciegoob @reidspoet @ash19871962 @babebenhardy @flipperpenguins @kuolonsyoja

@broken-stardust @beepbooptoop @ray-lia

#shadow writes stuff #masterlist #spencer reid #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid imagine #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x you #spencer reid fan fic #criminal minds fan fic

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palalabu · 3 years

Note

Because of your previous post…

Carlos/Lando 👄🚪🍯 or 😬💦 with some 🔥

Actually I just want to encourage you to write something about them, because I really enjoy your writing 😊

👄 sharing their first kiss

🚪 showing up at the other's door, begging for comfort

🍯 friends to lovers

😬 confessing their feelings

note: to another anon that sent me 👄🩹(tending to each other's wounds) this is also for you, bc I uh... I'm a bad writer who can't write prompts very well lol sorry!

So i took more of a liberty in the interpretation of the prompts. and the emoji shown are the prompts that i kinda took. So, enjoy! and thanks for enjoying my writing, anon!

“Carlos?” Lando asks. Only half-awake, with bed hair and a t-shirt that’s probably worn inside out. It’s Lando’s day off and he doesn't expect Carlos to be here, on the front door of his apartment, in Monaco, when he’s supposed to be with his family in Madrid. “Did you tell me you’re gonna come? Am I forgetting something?” Lando is so confused right now.

“No,” Carlos answers curtly. “I really need to use your bathroom though,” he adds as he tries to push Lando to the side to actually open the door wider for him to pass through. “I should’ve stopped at the last gas station,” he says as he hurries down the hallway before slamming the door of Lando’s bathroom.

Even though it takes a while, with his brain still foggy from sleep, Lando eventually catches up with what Carlos is saying. “Stopped at a gas station?” he asks his now closed front door, before stalking up to his guest toilet and proposing another question to another closed door, “What do you mean ‘stopped at the last gas station’? Carlos, did you drive here?”

“Yep,” comes the muffled answer from inside the bathroom.

“Why? How long was the drive? Why?!”

“Uh… Can we talk about it once I’m done?” answers Carlos, still from inside the bathroom.

Lando makes a grunt to tell Carlos that he agrees to it while thinking he probably should just give his friend a key to his apartment so he wouldn’t have to deal with whatever is going on here so early in the morning like this anymore (It’s technically 9 am, but Lando just went to bed at 6, so…). Carlos visits him so often these days anyway, he thinks as he walks to his couch in an attempt to catch just a little bit more sleep until Carlos is ready to talk about this whole morning visit. Because really it’s too early for anything other than sleeping.

“Don’t go back to sleep, you muppet!” Carlos calls out as he exits the bathroom, “I bring breakfast.” And without waiting for Lando’s answer, he starts laying down all different kinds of pastries and fruits on the table, before picking up a cup of coffee for himself and taking a seat on the sofa by Lando’s feet.

“Don’t drink that,” Lando chides with half-opened eyes. “Go to your room and take a nap or something. You drove the whole night.” Carlos doesn't exactly have his own room in Lando’s place. But he’s almost the sole regular visitor of Lando’s apartment that would spend a night (or two, or three, or a week’s worth). And he has left enough clothes and toiletries that it does kind of feel like Carlos’ room. “What time did you leave Madrid?”

“Eight something.”

“That’s almost 13 hours.” From across the couch where he’s laying down, Lando watches his friend taking a sip from his cup, not heeding his suggestion to take a nap. And Lando doesn't know this, but Carlos is just too keyed up to do what Lando tells him to do. “Why?”

“So I have time to think,” Carlos answers as he fiddles with his cup. “Or turn around. In case I chicken out."

"From doing what?" Instead of answering, Carlos chugs the rest of his coffee in one go and triggers Lando to sit up from his position, and laughs, “Congrats. You probably just ruin your whole day. You’re gonna be like a half-awake zombie or something.”

“Yeah, well,” Carlos says as he puts his cup down, “I need it.”

“Again, to do what?” Carlos bites his lips as he looks at Lando. Clearly still unsure if he should let his friend know. “Oh come on, Carlos,” Lando whines, “Just tell me. What were you driving 13 hours for?”

“Well, this.”

Carlos, obviously just changes his mind, decides to turn to face Lando and scoots much closer to him that their faces are only inches apart. “Stop me,” he says, “if you do not want any of this,” but his eyes are locked on Lando’s lips, before he finally closes the gap between them at a glacial pace, giving Lando every chance to push him away.

What he never expected was for Lando to hold Carlos by his hair and press their lips together before Carlos even had the chance to. He didn't expect Lando to take the lead either, with how he angles their heads a certain way so he could deepen the kiss, and with how his other hand travels from Carlos’ chest to his neck and all the way up to cradle his cheek. And when they part, Lando whispers against his lips, “Took you long enough.”

#carlando #my fic

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myherofanfictionacademy · 3 years

Text

Problem

A/N: This is the last story I'm going to be posting from my older stories. I think I might add onto this one in the future though...

Female Detective Reader

Their Pov.:

"Hey Aizawa fancy seeing you here." Hawks said as he spotted Aizawa in front of the agency building. "I just have some business to do here." Aizawa responded. "By hiding in those bushes? Are you spying on someone by any chance?" "Just drop it." "Always with a cold attitude."

Once Aizawa had started to help Dabi, it didn't take long for Hawks to start appearing around him often. He was a double agent, but besides that he had some history with Dabi. Aizawa didn't really get along with Hawks because of how flamboyant his personality was, so he could only tolerate him for so long.

"So how long are you just going to watch me for?" Aizawa asked Hawks, who had not moved away from him in over ten minutes. "Until you tell me what you're up to." Hawks responded. "I'm just looking out for someone. They helped me so I'm just trying to repay the favor." "Whose the person? Oh... Don't tell me it's a girl?" Hawks started to tease Aizawa, but he had already shut him out.

"Did I miss the memo for a meeting or something?" Dabi asked as he approached the two. "Oh hey Dabi." Hawks greeted. "Aizawa here finally got a girlfriend." "Just shut it you." Aizawa glared at him. Hawks had other plans and just continued to poke fun at him. "Come on, just point her out and I'll leave you alone."

The doors to the agency opened up as a few members of the agency headed out for lunch. After a few minutes the three watched as y/n walked out of the building. "Her." Aizawa said. "Are you satisfied now?" "No way!" both Hawks and Dabi exclaimed. "Wait you too?!" Hawks directed towards Dabi. "Looks like we have a problem. And there's no way you two are gonna steal her away from me." Dabi said.

"I Don't Think So." Hawks took off in the direction that y/n had gone. He didn't get very far as he found himself wrapped up in Aizawa's scarf. "Not before me you don't" Dabi and Aizawa began to race each other, with Hawks catching up a little bit later after freeing himself from the scarf. "No way am I going to lose to you two." This was going to end in the most heated competition, and with three passionate men after the heart of y/n, it was going to get very heated.

1st-Person Pov.:

The time was 12:15pm, and I was headed to my favorite café for lunch. "One cup of coffee and a bagel." I ordered. The day had been going great so far, and to top it off my boss gave me the rest of the day off, since I've been working overtime this past week. I also got the weekend off so I needed to find something to do.

"Hey there Kid." Hawks said as he sat down beside me. "How are you doing today." "I'm good." I responded. "Good to see you’re looking better." "Yeah, well.....would you believe me if I told you that I got a visit from a beautiful angel?" I became startled for a second. "You died?!"

Hawks burst out into a fit of laughter. "Actually I was talking about you." I felt my cheeks heat up a little. I wasn't used to receiving comments like this, so I lost my voice. Fortunately I didn't need to worry about replying.

"Hey Little Mouse." Dabi said as he took a seat across from us, Aizawa soon following. "I don't think I've ever seen you three in the same place at once." I commented. "It's not the first time." Aizawa told me. "We actually worked together, that's why I'm in a predicament right now." "Oh. I didn't know that Hawks was there though."

Hawks looked over at me. "I have some history with Dabi from years ago, which is why I became a double agent in the first place." I nodded my head as I followed along with what they were telling me. Hawks and Dabi's pasts connected when they were younger where they were put into a "program" to become "better".

"You seem to be getting along pretty well which is surprising." I told them. "We didn't get along very well before, but now we have a common denominator in our equation." Aizawa told me. "Anyways, the time has really flown by. Don't you need to get back to the agency?" "Nope. I'm off 'til Monday."

"Then how about we do something?" Hawks suggested. "Like what?" I asked. "We could go to the spring festival." Dabi said. We all agreed on it and that we would head there tomorrow morning, then went our separate ways. I was glad to see that the three of them were doing so much better.

I didn't bother packing that night and instead did it in the morning. We would be spending the weekend somewhere on the beach, but Aizawa, Dabi, and Hawks wouldn't tell me much. It was around 10am. when I received a text from Hawks:

Hawks: Good morning Songbird. Send me your address so we can pick you up.

I sent him my address and in no time at all, the three of them were knocking on my apartment door. "Looking good kid." Hawks complimented me. I gave him a quiet thanks then we headed off to the train station. It was only an hour train ride to get to the beach.

"Wow this place is packed." I thought as we waited for the train to arrive. "I'm guessing that it's going to be pretty busy at the beach as well." "Is something wrong little mouse?" Dabi asked me. "Just thinking about how many people are traveling." I responded. "It is spring break, but besides that it makes it easier on me because no one will pay attention to who I am."

The train was a little delayed due to some maintenance issues, but it was nothing major. The seats we were taken to were in business class so they were really nice. It wasn't as cramped as I thought it would be. I even got to sit next to the window with Aizawa next to me, and Hawks and Dabi in front of us.

The train ride was pretty calm, until Hawks pulled out a card game for us to play. He did step away with the other two for a couple minutes before the game started. I assumed that they made some sort of a bet because of how competitive they got over the simple card game. At the end of it, Aizawa won the first round and Dabi won the second one.

"Wow there really are a lot of people here." I said as we exited the train station. The beach was right in front of us. The crystal clear water sparkled under the light from the sun. The waves weren't very high, and all along the beach there were a ton of people.

"It might be hard to find a spot to relax on the beach." I sighed. "Don't worry Kitty." Aizawa said. "We already came up with a solution for that." "Don't tell her too much." Hawks said appearing behind me. "It will ruin the surprise. Now let's get a move on it." Hawks immediately picked me up and flew into the sky.

Aizawa and Dabi shouted as they ran after us. "Hawks....we should go back for them." I said after I could no longer see Dabi or Aizawa. "Come on Kid. I just wanted to spend some time alone with you." Hawks said. "Besides I was the one who put in the most work for planning this special trip. I'm also the one with the key." "Fine...But we have to stop and pick something up to surprise them."

Hawks landed near a café that was selling cakes. "This should work." He said. I looked at all the cakes before deciding on one that had chocolate and (insert your favorite flavor) pocky sticks. "How about this one?" I asked Hawks. "Looks good. Now hurry up before the other two beat us to our destination."

In just a few minutes we had arrived in front of a pretty big house that was right on the beach. "Wow, it's so beautiful." I told Hawks. "Did you rent this?" "Actually, it's a place that I own." He responded. "I have a few places for when I travel for work." He unlocked the door and gestured for me to enter ahead of him.

The place had a very cozy setup. I wanted to look around a bit, but I wanted to set the cake out in the kitchen first. I put out some cups by the cake and Hawks got out some drinks.

"What do you think your doing leaving us behind like that?" Dabi said as he and Aizawa entered the kitchen. They both had a dark aura around them, so I came up with something to save Hawks from becoming fried chicken. "Sorry, but I asked him to because I wanted to surprise you both." I said.

Fortunately, the mood seemed to have calmed down after that. "Don't forget that I won earlier." I overheard Aizawa say in the kitchen as I sat in the living room. "Yeah...yeah. Just stop rubbing it in." Hawks responded. "Still, I don't think I'm going to be able to hold back soon." "Me too. We should just all come out and tell y/n." Dabi said.

Their vagueness of things was really starting to get on my nerves. I decided to just go ahead and confront them. "What's up with you three?" I started. " You keep being so vague. You keep calling me by these pet names. You keep being so competitive w....."

"Okay I'm going to stop you right there before you run out of breath songbird." Hawks said. "It's not something that's easy to tell you." "You see Little Mouse, You have gained all of our attention." Dabi continued. "You've caused quite the problem between the four of us." Aizawa added. "Songbird...." "Little Mouse...." "Kitty...." "We adore you."

I was frozen for a few seconds because I could not believe that the three men in front of me just declared their fondness towards me. "But I..." I started. "Why?" "Why not?" Aizawa asked in return. "You're beautiful, kind, independent, and strong." "What kind of a man wouldn't be attracted to that kind of a woman." Hawks said.

My face was bright red, and I felt like hiding myself away from them in embarrassment. "All three of you though?" I asked. "Yep." Dabi said. "If you tried to get rid of even one of us, we might have to just tie you up." In my head I was completely freaking out, but I tried to remain calm on the outside, although I'm sure that it didn't work because of how the three looked at me.

#aizawa x reader #hawks x reader #dabi x reader #mha fanfiction #bnha x female reader

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eeveedel · 3 years

Text

WIP Sunday

Hello all, I was tagged by to post a bit of my current WIP alongside some “art” -- I don’t have a current moodboard but I thought I would provide some general ~~aesthetic pics and another preview of the rancher harry fic -- this time an HL meet cute! I hope you all enjoy, and happy Sunday

Harry heard a rapping at the screen door, and he grunted, shifting his weight forward so he could sit up and hoist himself out of his armchair.

He took a step forward on his good leg while his bad one dragged behind him. After a bit of walking around, it usually woke up enough for him to put more weight on it, but for now, after his rest, it was a dead weight of pins and needles behind him. It took a bit of effort to get to the front door, but he got there eventually. He grabbed his cane that was leaning by the door, and then opened the wood door, revealing just the screen and what lay beyond it.

There was a man in mint green scrubs and a thick corduroy jacket on his porch, perfectly centered between the big American flag hanging beside Harry’s door and the pots of tulips lining the front gate. The man at the front door was young. He had some creases around his eyes and mouth but his freshly shaved face looked so youthful, along with his bright eyes behind his big, wire frame glasses.

“Howdy,” Harry drawled, lifting his thermos to his mouth, “You must be — “ His tongue worked in his mouth, trying to come up with the name Margaret had given him last week. It wasn’t something common around here, and yet it still evaded him.

“Shoot, I’m sorry,” he sighed, pushing up the brim of his hat with his thumb, “Help me out, what’s your name, son?”

“Oh, I’m Dr. Tomlinson, but you can call me Louis,” he said. “Dr. Baldwin caught me up on some of the animals you have here and their needs, sir,” he said. “I know you have a pregnant cow nearing the end of term and a newly pregnant mare that just needs a bit of a checkup as your main concerns. She also told me you had a few roosters and a chicken coop, is that correct?”

Harry cracked a smile and nodded.

“Well, that’s correct. Seems like you did your homework,” he said. “Cherry’s gonna have a baby now damn day now and I just found out about Goldie last month.”

He took a sip of his coffee, shuffling his feet and readjusting his cane as he did.

“You don’t need to worry too much about the chickens, they nearly take care of themselves. Got a few pigs but those are going to market in a couple months, but you can take a look at ‘em if you want to.”

He pushed at the screen door, moving out onto the porch to meet Louis directly. When he was in front of the man, he could see Louis looked even younger up close, and he was nearly a full head shorter than Harry.

“Can I get you something to drink or anything before we go out?” Harry asked, taking the briefest moment to look the young vet over.

“Um, maybe a glass of water after we finish up? It is a bit hot out today, even though it’s January,” Louis rambled. “I mean, I came from San Francisco, so it’s still hot there— anyways, sorry.”

He exhaled, his cheeks already pink.

“Could you show me to Cherry first, please?” Louis asked. “I want to make sure she and her calf are in tip top shape.”

Harry smiled gently. The young vet was eager, and looked a bit flustered. He tried not to let his gaze linger too much longer, although he already liked him.

“Sure thing. I’ll show you out the pasture. Cherry’s probably out gossiping with her friends.”

He walked to the edge of the porch, taking the small ramp that was easier to navigate with his cane.

“Tell me, they have a lot of cows out in California, Louis?” he asked as they trudged along the path, “Because if this is your first one, I’ll give you a fair warning. Cherry’s a sweet girl but a little sassy.”

“Well, I grew up in San Francisco, so no, we don’t have a lot of farms there,” Louis said. “But I studied with a bit of everything in veterinary school, and went to a lot of farms up north. So yeah, I’ve worked with cows.”

“Good, good,” Harry nodded.

He walked through along the dirt path that led from the house to the rest of the ranch. He led Louis past the chicken coop and the large horse barn, moving out to the back part of the property with the cattle barn and the large pasture. His leg was starting to wake up, making his gait a bit less strained.

“Where did you study?” he asked.

“UC Santa Barbara for undergrad and then vet school at UC Berkeley,” Louis said. “I just graduated last spring, actually.”

“Congratulations,” Harry said. “Before you look at my girls, you wanna tell me know if you were bottom of your class?”

Louis laughed a little, scratching the back of his neck.

“I was actually valedictorian.”

“Damn. Undergrad or vet school?”

“Uh,” Louis said, smiling sheepishly. “Both? And high school.”

“Jeez,” Harry chuckled. “Well. I didn’t even go to college, so you’ve already impressed me many times over.”

They arrived in front of the enormous cattle barn and the wide pasture beyond it. Harry smiled to himself, lifting the hand that wasn’t gripping his cane.

“Yep,” he smiled to himself, “There she is.”

He gestured to the pasture, and specifically pointed to one of the cows, a rich red brown and swollen at the belly, who was smack in the middle of a group of five other black and white cows.

“Gossiping, just like I thought,” Harry said. He reached for the gate, going to unlock it, “Well, come on, you can give me your expert opinion.”

“Wow, she’s beautiful,” Louis marveled.

“Don’t let her hear that, it’ll go straight to her head,” Harry said. He opened the gate fully, then opened the pasture and turned around, holding it open for Louis.

Once they were both inside, Harry approached Cherry, cooing and clicking his tongue as he walked. She looked up and stared at him, chewing slowly on a thick clump of grass, but when she was done, she let out a low moo and slowly but surely waddled towards him.

“Here she comes,” Harry smiled.

They both stood and watched her as she slowly came over, and when she did, she immediately gravitated to Harry.

“Hey, princess,” Harry said. He set his hand on her head and gently stroked her with his thumb, smiling to himself as she blinked at him with her big, milk chocolate eyes.

“Louis’s gonna take a look at you, pretty girl,” Harry said. “You be nice to him.”

Harry kept petting Cherry’s head and then looked over to Louis. The vet was kneeling on the ground, unlocking the briefcase he had brought. It was funny, seeing him with a shiny, clearly barely used case. Margaret had always just shoved her tools into her ancient Jansport backpack, which was covered in twenty years’ worth of coffee stains and held together with duct tape and spite.

Louis took out a pair of latex gloves and a stethoscope, then moved closer to the animal. He gave her a settle pat on her swollen side, then put the stethoscope’s earpieces in. He set the metal diaphragm on her side, and Cherry jolted a bit, but Louis cooed at her and kept petting her side as he listened. He closed his eyes and nodded a bit as he moved the cold metal over her stomach, humming softly to himself.

Harry watched Louis carefully touch and examine Cherry, the young man’s hands gentle but sure as he did his job. Harry had had his hesitations before Louis arrived. But he seemed at home, and like he really cared about doing a good job. Harry could appreciate that. He had spent years building up trust with Margaret to work with his animals, but, maybe he was just getting sentimental at his age, or Louis really did have a special touch, but he immediately felt just fine with the younger man taking care of his herd.

After a few minutes Louis opened his eyes and ducked his head down, examining Cherry’s udders and nether regions. Finally, he lifted his head and pulled himself up, taking the stethoscope out of his ears and draping it around his neck.

“Well, she looks great,” Louis said as he peeled off his gloves and shoved them into his jacket pocket. “The calf’s got a nice, strong heartbeat. She seems about a couple weeks away, but just keep an eye on her – “

“Early labor, yeah,” Harry said. “I always start preparing at least a couple weeks in advance of the due date, anyways. My girl Caroline went into labor a couple years ago, fuckin’ 16 days before she was due, and I was in Austin for the weekend. Only time I left the house in months, and she picked that weekend.”

One of the white cows in the pasture mooed loudly, and Harry looked over his shoulder and glared.

“Yeah, I’m talkin’ about you, fuckin’ drama queen,” he scoffed. “She’s a good girl. And a tough one. Had a delivery all by herself and nearly gave me a heart attack when I got home and there was a new baby toddling around.”

He turned back to Louis, offering an apologetic smile.

“Sorry, don’t mean to bore you with farm stories right off the bat.”

“It’s okay,” Louis said. “I love to hear animal stories.”

“Well, let me know in a few months if you’re sick of cow stories. That’s nearly the only kind of stories we have in this town.”

Louis just laughed and lifted his hand, shifting his glasses up his nose.

“Would you show me to Goldie, please? Just to see how her early stages are going.”

“Oh, yeah, of course,” Harry said. “Goldie’s in the small barn, come on.”

#rancher harry #uwu

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caffeineaddicted-noonie · 3 years

Note

Hello i hope you're having a great day and i wanted to ask for a matchup! Creepypasta romantic :)

I'm an enfp and december capricorn, idrk know what my sexuality is but any gender is fine! I'm around 170 cm i think,

Ive got shoulder length blue hair, green eyes and i'm a bit chubby, i like to wear comfortbale stuff so im mostly just in my pajamas all day lol but if i go out id like to look cool in a fairy grunge type of way yk

Personality;

I'm a pretty chill person, tho i can get annoyed fast (for example; if id be in a relationship with someone i wouldnt mind cuddles etc but if theyd want to be affectionate all the time id be a bit annoyed by that lol) so like yk there are some boundaries, im pretty much down to do anything fun either at night or in daytime it doesnt realky matter as long if its fun im both introverted and extroverted it depends on the situstion and who i'm with lol but overall ig im nice 😋

Stuff i like;

I'm gonna try and keep this short since i could go on and on about stuff i like haha

Art (drawing, digital art)

Music

Reading

Crochet

Greek mythology>

Sleeping ( i sleep alot so cuddling would be nice)

Playing videogames (fnaf, sally face, genshin impact, etc)

Cosplaying

My fav type of activities to do;

Walking around forests and listening to music

Theme parks>>>

Ice skating when there are barely any people

Swimming ( going to a beach or just in a river)

Swinging on swinfs at night its so comforting

Sleeping

watching series, anime, movies

My fav food is vegetable or chicken soup, pancakes and sushi! Its kinda basic but its so good, i love to talk about my interests like greek mythology alot so someone that would listen to that woukd be so nice, i'm not a very energetic person at day so i usually just vibe in my bed all day or i go out and do some fun stuff but jts different at nighttime so i'm usually up at night and vibe while drawing stuff :)

I hope this isnt too much i tried to keep it short 😰 so im sorry if its a bit long! But anyway thank you in advance! <3

ORAITY! Hemlo! I‘m sorry this took a long tme to post, it’s mainly because of I was unsure to match you up with who. Brain conflict? Maybe :D But it’s fine bc know it is complete! Yep! Now here it is

I MATCH YOU UP WITH

BEN DROWNED 👾

maybe it takes a moment log 1 - friends🌹

+ Ben and you, freinds. How? + Breakfast, cereals, you two. On a Monday morning, during breakfast, a single cereal box stood in the almost empty kitchen cupboard. Two pairs of eyes watched it. They look at each other. One had wheat blond hair and the other had blue hair. They both wondered if the cereal was enough for both. The blond looked at the other for a moment before walking towards the cupboard to take it. He struggles a bit due to standing on his tippy toes. After managinbg to grab it, two bowls were in his hands and he puts them down on the counter. He looks into the cereal bowl and sees that it’s quite enough. Ben pours the cereal equaly into the two bowls. He looks at you again and remembers about the milk. Masky had used it yesterday when baking bread (yes, Masky bakes, my hcs :D) He sighs. ”Can you check if there’s uh any milk in the fridge?” he asks you. ”yeap,” you replied. Upon opening the fridge, you were greeted with no milk. You sigh, ”no milk,” He groans *Damn you Masky* You two ended up eating with no milk.. + The both of you meet again when wanting to watch TV Noonie exited the TV room with a yawn. It was 11.45 pm. ”Right on time..C’mon, head to sleep,” Masky told her. She nods sleepily. The sounds of footsteps were heard heading towards the door to the TV room. A blue haored girl sat on the couch, her hands were on the TV remote. She was changing channels, nothing interesting was on at this time. Her friend left to sleep. The girl wasn’t really sleepy yet. Her attention shifted towards the door when the sound of the door nob being turned was heard. A blond boy was seen entering, ”Mind if I join you? I can’t really sleep..” You nodded, ”Sure..honestly, i have nothing to watch so..here,” you handed him the remote. He took it and sat a few inces a way from you. He immediately put on Animal Planet. His eyes were somewhat dazzled by the otters that were on the screen. You noticed and ask, ”You love animals?” He nodded, too focus on the show. You smiled slightly, ”So, Animal Crossing?” He looks at you, ”You play?” ”Yep,” ”Any others?” ”Yeah, Fnaf, Sally face, G.I etc etc” ”Cool…uh…what’s G.I?” ”Genshin Impact,” ”Ouhh, i don’t play it but I’ve seen it in youtube ads…heard it’s fun tho..” ”You should definitely play! I can teach you if you want to!” You told him eagerly. ”For real?” ”Yeah!” ”Ok, if you say so..sure,” + And friendship~ + Gaming with each other is a hobby. ”see you at 3 pm,” ”wait, wasn’t it at 4 pm?” ”…3 or 4?” ”What about 2? We could play Animal Crossing until 4 and continue with Genshin,” ”Sounds alright,” Noonie watches and wonders how could they play for so long + He’s not a big fan of greek mythology tho. ”Ares is Athena’s step bro?” “Uh, accurately, half-brother” ”But then she has a brother?” ”Imma start the story-“ ”Please don’t” ”Ok…” He will listen tho! Just not the second time because his brain gets jammed a lot XD + He might asks you to read some books to him. Just don’t read him the book about Zelda. + He will binge with you! Totally will. Watch anything, and he’ll binge. ”Wanna watch Downton Abbey with me and Noonie?” ”You watch Downton Abbey???” ”yeah, who knew politics back then were handled more properly.” + If you draw anime, he’ll ask you to draw him as anime. He will I tell you. + I can see you two walking around the forest rocking to songs. Like, when he listens to any song, he goes wild. Melodies just get him. + Does he tease you? Sometimes eheh. Or should i say, it’s his habit lol

to see it bloom beautifully log 2 - love birds♥️

+ Ok, I- Noonie helped him confess. ”Spending time with you have made me realised that I love to do nothing more. I’d probably be bored to death. I don’t know what and how to say…just…your voice melts my heart, your eyes enchant me in the best ways. How I wish that every second was with you and only you. But here I am, speaking to you through writting. Straight to the point, you have my heart. I love you. Ben.” Noonie looks at you after reading his letter to them. ”Where is he?” you asked. ”He’s uh in his closet..” she says awkwardly. + You comfront him, calmly and comfortly. He admits his love for you. And you said ily <3 + Ah yes, adorableeee + When you ice skate, he usually watches you. Be’s not really good at skatibg and he’s a bit scared too, since under ice is water. If he wants to skate with you tho, he’ll want to do that in a ice rink. Very clumsy haha. You watched him as he skates for the first time in a few months. Ben holds on to the side railings as he tries to balance himself. You chuckle and skate to him. ”Grab my hand..” he looks at you and does so, ”Babe..i’m rusty,” he says ”You’ll get used to it!” + He would love to swing with you! Probably made one for you too + Please please take care of yourself when swimming. I beg you, he’s damn worried. But he won’t stop you tho. + He might look like he’s not interested in greek stuff, but he is. Even when he’s playing a game, he’ll listen to you. Because you’re fun, your voice is soothing and he loves you! + Theme parks! He loves going there for the stall games and the uh merry go round heh. Roller coaster is his fav too. Loves the thrill. + He always lay down with you at night. Whether you two are talking or you’re drawing or vibibg to songs, he’s there on the bed relaxing with you. + Overall, a promising relationship. He might be hard to get along or communicate at times but he tries to make it better for the both of you!

Sorry it took sooooo damn long @yosei1i! Apologies. Hope you have a great day and take care! Please leave a review or comment ^^

#creepypasta matchups #creepypasta #noonies writtings

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theravencawsatmidnight · 4 years

Text

Pink Chains Sequel

The oldest. Male, twin. Souta.(Means A sudden wind or sound)

The middle. Male. Twin. Kaito. (Means sea or ocean)

Youngest. Female. Kana. (Means powerful)

@galagcica @squeaky-ducky @kozushiki @haikyuu-but-low-iq @lunebabie @derpeedoo @kayisweird @zopzoop

“We do now!!!!” You told him, rubbing your stomach

“Swee..sweetie are you serious?” He climbed over the desk grabbing you and pulling you between his legs.

“Yep!!! Surprise Kyo!!!”

He was a little shocked for a few minutes, you were telling him how excited you were but he could not register it. A kid, not one but three. Will they be like him? Scary? Will they think hes scary?!?

“Kyo?” You lightly tugged his shirt so he would look at you. “Kyo whats wrong?”

He squeezed you sighing deep. “Im nervous sweetie thats all.”

You laid your head on his chest. “Well.. i am too . But! I have you to help and you have me. Not to mention all your friends. “ you took his ring hand to hold it and nuzzled his sleeve. “I love you, we will be fine Kyo.”

Kyo took in a deep breath and kissed your head. “Yeah, we will. I love you so much sweetie.”

It was an interesting nine months for everyone. Kyo had gotten his friends together for beach volleyball one night , you were there too but you were sitting with a sundress on looking excited.

“Soo...” Iwaizumi said, rubbing his head. “Whats this about?”

Oikawa and Mattsun were stumped too, so was Yahaba. Bokuto was trying to piece it together as well.

You got up and turned to the side and Kyo put his hand on your stomach. “Well... lets just hope you can deal with more of me”

Safe to say Kyo got tackled into the sand by everyone.

Time Skip to the kids being 7.

💕Kyo and Reader still live in his home. Iwaizumi does too since he owns the basement half of the house.

💕Chicken Legs had trouble adjusting to the children but Readers cats have helped relax and calm him. He's not so shaky anymore.

💕King is the kids number one fan. He is always there to help them with a prank on their father or to help them up and down the stairs.

💕Rex gets brushed every five minutes and he *loves it*. Kana also likes putting ribbons on his tail.

💕Mango is carried around everywhere by Kaito because he is small and “fun to carry”

💕The twins get up to no good alot. Souta is like the wind, no one ever knows if he's gonna do something. Kaito is more calm, like the ocean . But just like his brother, he's right there to lend a hand in mischief

💕Kana is attached to Kyo and Readers hip nearly 24/7 because she is scared of everything. She was tiny at birth. A “runt of the litter” Kyo called it, which gave her the nickname “Kana Pup” by Kyo. Everything is bigger than her and she doesn't like it. She's scared of Oikawa and it makes him sad.

💕Kyo and Reader own a bigger building together that they turned into The Dog House. They sell apparel but with Readers designs now too. The kids hangout at the shop usually after school.

💕The building has an upper floor or office area where Reader works on new designs / manages the finances while Kyo works the floor.

💕Souta and Kaito spend their days greeting customers and telling them specials (as best they can) . If Kana is not with her mother she is with Kyo at the register coloring under the desk so no one can see her.

💕kyo does not know what to do about Kana, he's worried she won't have friends and isolate herself. Iwaizumi suggests a hobby or club for middle school and Oikawa suggests volleyball.

💕its at the beach Kana realizes how fun volleyball is. She even lets Oikawa show her how to play.

💕Mattsun still has his tattoo shop. Kyo now has a back piece too. It's three wolf pups .

💕Kana joins the volleyball club

💕the twins join an art club and it is very interesting to them . Souta & Kaito are naturals at coming up with designs

💕iwaizumi babysits when Kyo and reader need alone time at the house

💕every now and then Kyo will check in on his kids at night, he leans on the wall of the door just watching them sleep. It's been a few years since they were born and he's still dumbfounded he could make such blessings

💕Kanas first game is a little rocky, she's nervous about people watching her. That is until Bokuto yells for the stands ‘all eyes on you because you are the star of this court!!!’ . She pulls through and turns out she spikes just like her father. They win because of her. Reader cries tears of joy and the twins are going nuts , Kyo pulls reader close kissing her

💕The twins debut a simple design. It's a crow with its wings out with a chain collar on its neck. Their parents love it.

Time skip to HighSchool

💕The kids go to Karasuno

💕The twins are in a design/business club

💕Kana is the wing spiker of her team. She is tall like her father and brings her team to Nationals.

💕Mattsun has a pretty little happy girl come into his shop one day asking for a fluffy kitty tattoo . Mattsun thanks god this is happening and gets her number

💕Oikawa & Iwaizumi still work at the Dog House. Oikawa now has the same volleyball tattoo his friends have. Iwaizumi helps the twins bring their designs up to sell online

After High School.

💕Kana plays for the Black Jackals. The twins have a successful online business selling their designs on different things.

💕Kyo and Reader have expanded the Dog House and it has more locations now.

💕Every friday night they spend their time laying on Kyos car with music on watching the stars in their backyard.

The end 💕

Little bonus mini drabbles!!

“raaaa!!!!!” Yelled Kaito

“Aaaarrgg!!!!” Yelled Souta.

Kana had her ears covered and had Chicken Legs laying down next to her with his paw over his eyes. She was sitting on the floor coloring in her book when her siblings rushed down the stairs with toilet paper and heavy eye makeup on their face and body. King, Rex and Mango were close behind with equal amounts of toilet paper on them too. This was a regular saturday...

Iwaizumi was on the couch watching these terrors run around the house . He pat Kana on the head counting quietly. “And 5...4...3...2...1...” The garage door could be heard and the twins and dogs stopped. Heavy steps and giggling were getting closer.

“Kaito.”

“Yes Souta?”

“It appears we are going to die today”

“Yes i believe so.”

Kana peaked at Iwaizumi and he just gave her that smile that made her get red in the face. The door opened and you and Kyo saw your kids covered in toilet paper and makeup. The dogs too. Kyo rubbed between his eyes and you giggled going over to Kana who was holding her arms up to you.

“Souta?”

“Yes Kaito?”

“It was nice knowing you.”

“Likewise”

(Whenever Kyo asks Iwai why he allows this he just shrugs and says “hey they aint my kids 😋”)

*💕

Kyo had picked the kids up from school and went straight into work. No one minded that the kids were there, they behaved. Mostly.

“Welcome to The Dog House!!!” Yelled the twins“The finest dogs and the biggest house!!! At your service!!!!”

Youd never seen so many metal heads giggle and chuckle like little kids before. Kana though, was under the register coloring and leaning on her fathers leg. Kyo leaned on the register looking down at his daughter.

“Kana pup”

“Papa..?” She asked, looking up, brushing her hair from her face.

“Do you wanna greet customers with your brothers?

She shrugged pulling the book closer. “N-no..”

He rolled his shoulders looking back up to see his friends frowning at him.

“Maybe a club will help”

“Or volleyball!!!”

*💕

The twins were running around the beach with Mattsun chasing them , Kyo, Iwa, and Kawa were tossing the ball to each other. And you were sitting on a towel under an umbrella with Kana clinging to your arm. You had noticed she was fixed on what her father was doing and you signaled to get his attention and pointed at yoir daughter.

“Kana pup.” He said, catching the ball. “Cmere for a second.”

She shook her head and you rubbed her side.”just for a second baby.”

Kana gets up joining her father and he crouches down behind her. “Put your fists together , be still okay?”

“ dont.. wanna get hit..”

“You wont i promise.” He nodded to Iwaizumi and he lightly tossed the ball to Kana . “Now just move your wrist down. Then connect with the ball semding it up”

As soon as the ball hit her wrists she whined turning around to hug her father. “Kana, look.” He turned her head . The ball was in the air . “You did it.”

“I.. i hit it.”

“Maybe Oikawa can explain better.” He said, getting up and Oikawa crouched down next to her. Kana whined giving him a scared look and he just held his hands out to recieve the ball.

“Its easy, promise!” The ball bounced off his wrists.

After a few tries Kana got the positioning right and even asked Oikawa to help and show her more.

*💕

One night Mattsun is at his shop filling in his laptop with appointments, transactions, bills. Its late, maybe almost 10. He liked to stay open when he had late nights like this. No one ever came by but.. it made him hope someone would. Mattsun was covered head to toe in tattoos. The bell dinged and he looked up from his desk and fell forward.

It was a girl; pink shoes, dyed highlighted pink hair, a white belly top and shorts. “Hey Mr!!!! Can i get a tattoo please?! A fluffy kitty or kitten? Do you do those? “

Mattsun smiled up at his ceiling . “Whoevers watching , thank you.”

He looked back over at the huffy girl. “Yeah i can do that Kitty, let me get a sketch going and you can tell me what you think.” He said with a very big smile. “Whats your name?” He asked , going around his desk to his wheely chair .

“Y/n!! “ the girl skipped over sitting in the chair criss cross. “Can you do it here?” She pointed to her inner thigh .

Mattsun thanked whoever was watching over him again but in his head. “I sure can y/n. I sure can.”

“No no!! Kitty!! I like it.”

Mattsun had a silly grin on his face now. “Okay kitty”

*💕

Its late at night and the only one up is Kyo. He was leaning on the wall watching his kids, ‘how did i get here?’ He asked himself while eyeing his bruised knuckles. Slowly he looked up. “I love you guys so much...”

“And i love you.” He heard behind him. A giggle too.

#kyotani 💕#kyotani x reader #kyotani headcanons #pink chains

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incorrect-hanna-barbera-quotes · 3 years

Text

Snagglepuss: Hi. I'm Snagglepuss. Me an

Snagglepuss: Hi. I'm Snagglepuss. Me and my old pal [REDACTED: ADMIN OF ACCOUNT] would like to thank all our lovely followers for sticking with us & enjoying "Incorrect Hanna-Barbera" quote's for so long.

This page is officially one year old now! We've made a lot of great posts that the fans love over this past year, so it's time to take a moment to look back on our Greatest Hits! These are going in order of least to most notes, but be sure to reblog and let us know which one is YOUR #1!

#5: The Fred Flintstone Incident

(Original Post)

Barney: Well uh, gee Wilma, what's got you so down?

Wilma: Oh, hey Barney. I've just been so worried about Fred, y'know?

Barney: Fred? Well, what's wrong with him?

Wilma: Oh, he didn't tell you? Weird! Well, we're pretty sure he's turning into, like, a vampire? Or some kind of ghoul? It's pretty weird.

Barney: Gee, that sounds rough!

Wilma: Exactly! I mean, how is he gonna go to work when the sunlight burns his undead flesh?

[Laugh track]

#4: Cow's Problem

(Original Post)

Cow: Chickenn? Oh, Chickeeeennnn?

Chicken: Whaddaya WANT?! I'm busy tryna GAME over here!!!

Cow: Ohhh, I think the rapture has begun!

[Cow gestures for him to look out the window. Chicken sighs and pauses his game so he can go see.]

Chicken: Oh PLEASE, I'm sure yer just--WHAT THE?!

Cow: Isn't it just the mostest be-AUTIFUL thing you've ever seen? Oh my goodness, I can hardly contain my EXCITEMENT! I'm gonna go out to see!

Chicken: UH--Wait, I don't think that's--

[Cow runs out the front door. Chicken reaches out a hand to stop her, but is too stunned to make any meaningful impact. It is too late for either of them. Just an average Saturday night in this household!]

#3: Space Ghost's Incredible Plan

(Original Post)

Space Ghost: Wallet, yeah...

Space Ghost: Keys, yep.

Space Ghost: Welp, that's all the essentials covered. Now I just gotta figure out what to do with this thing...

[The camera pans down to show the object Space Ghost is looking at: The skeletal remains of Blip the monkey.]

#2: Important Question

(Deleted)

Blue Falcon: Hey, can--

Blue Falcon: Hey,

Blue Falcon: Hey, do ANY of you know where the NEAREST--

Blue Falcon: DO ANY OF YOU KNOW WHERE THE

[The Blue Falcon's desperate attempts at asking a question are drowned out by the overpowering noises of the many wild animals currently tearing up his living room.]

[Finally, he punches a wall with enough power to knock the whole thing down, along with the few precious antique vases that had managed to survive this long, to get everyone's attention.]

Blue Falcon: DO ANY OF YOU KNOW WHERE THE NEAREST WALMART IS I AM OUT OF FRUIT LOOPS AND DYNOMUTT REALLY LIKES THEM AND GETS REALLY SAD WHEN HE CAN'T HAVE ANY AND I JUST WANNA LOOK OUT FOR HIM YOU KNOW?

[The animals regard his question for a moment before almost immediately going back to going apeshit on his furniture. The Blue Falcon is sad.]

And the moment you've all been waiting for, it's....

#1: Yogi's Trick

(Original Post)

Yogi: Just look around you, Boo-Boo! It's gonna be great! Just you wait and see!

Boo-Boo: Gee, I'm still not really sure about this, Yogi.

Yogi: Come on! What part of this wouldn't work?!

Boo-Boo: That's not the part I'm worried about, Yogi, I think it might work a little too well.

Yogi: No such thing, Boo-Boo! Now, help me finish up drawing this circle.

Boo-Boo: Well alright, but don't say I didn't warn you.

Yogi: Boo-Boo, Boo-Boo, you worry too much! I can ASSURE you, the secrets of human transmutation are right within our grasp! I'm talkin' IMMORTALITY, Boo-Boo! We could be Gods! I'd say that's worth any risk, wouldn't you say agree?

Boo-Boo: Hm........

---

...And, that's all of them! Thanks a lot for reading, and we sure hope you stick around for the next year of great quotes! Yabba Dabba Digital!

#incorrect quotes #snagglepuss #Barney rubble #wilma flintstone #cow and chicken #cow #chicken #space ghost #blue falcon #yogi bear #boo boo #it will all be over soon. dont worry too much about the specifics.

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argumentl · 3 years

Text

The Freedom of Expression Ep 45 - Walking from Kishibojin, Haunted staircase.

00:00 J: Ah, this, this! Akamaru Bakery.

00:20 K: So, as to why we are here..it will be a mystery to everyone I think.

J: Haha

K: Joe just really wanted to eat this bread.

J: Thats right.

K: So, we came here.

J: Yes.

K: Akamaru Bakery.

J: Yep, Akamaru Bakery.

K: Where is this?

J: Its Zōshigaya. Well, Zōshigaya is just up there, but this place probably only locals know about. Its on Tsurumaki Street. This is a very small shopping street, but Akamaru Bakery is here. I found this place by chance before, and it was really good.

T: What did you get?

J: Kaoru?

K: Chicken Nanban

T: I got a hot dog.

J: I got this tuna and egg mix.

K: I wanted to get that, but I thought I shouldn't if you are getting it.

J: Haha, no, no, no, that makes me look bad.

K: Hahah.

J: This is ¥190, right?

T: Its cheap, isn't it?

J: It is cheap! Ok, lets stand and eat.

T: Yep.

J: Ok, lets go for it. Apologies to the locals, we are not trying to be rude. Its a food report. This kind of bakery is quite rare these days, isn't it? They're all like new, stylish ones now.

K: *eats* Mm.

J: *eats* Mm, tastes good.

K: Yeah, its good.

J: The bread is really soft too.

T: Yeah.

J: I didn't eat before this.

K: If this was in my neighborhood, I would come every day.

J: Absolutely. Ah, delicious. So, this is like an 8 min walk from Zōshigaya station, right? Its a bit of a walk, but you'll be able to find it online if you search for it.

T: Ths is good. Its delicious.

2:25 J: (*At station*) Well now..

K: Where is this?

J: So this is the tram on the Toden-Arakawa line.

T: Its Kishibojinmae station.

K: Ahh, so ??? (*Facing away from camera with mask on...couldn't clearly make out what he said*)

J: Thats it. So, we are gonna move to a different spot from here.

T: Yep, its been all funfunfun before now, but this time we are gonna go looking for some Tokyo mysteries. So, we'll get on this train and go to a certain place.

J: Tokyo Sports is all about mysteries, monsters, and UFOs, right? (*Couldn't really follow the rest of this exchange*)

*They get on, then off the train at the next spot*

3:29 T: The mystery spot that I am gonna introduce is this bridge. Omokage bridge (Omokage=face/visage).

J: It just looks like a regular bridge.

T: Its a really short bridge. Its almost not a bridge. This explains the name (*points to info board*). So, actually, on the otherside of the bridge there used to be the criminal execution center for Zōshigaya.

J: Ahh, so this is not exactly the river Styx, but..

T: Yeh, and they would part from thier family on this side of the bridge, and be taken over to the other side.

J: I see.

T: Its just a theory, but its thought that its called 'Omokage/visage brige', because they left the memory thier faces here. But there is also a history to this brigde. You know the story of 'Yotsuya Kaidan'/The Ghost of Yotsuya?

J: Yep, yep.

T: With Oiwa san..

J: Like 'I curse youuuu'

T: Yeh, yeh, yeh. Do you know the story of Oiwa san?

J: Yeh, I do. Like 'One plate, two plates..'

T: No, thats Sarayashiki, thats a different one. So, what happened was, there was a man, and his wife called Oiwa. The man became annoyed with her, and she was made to drink a poison which scarred her face. Then he forced her to seperate from him. The woman cursed him, saying she would come back as a ghost. This woman Oiwa was nailed to a door post, and thrown in the river to be washed away, there's a scene like that, right? Its thought that this is the spot she was thrown in the river. So, this story, Yotsuya Kaidan, came about as a Kabuki play after its writer, Tsuruya Nanboku had gathered up a lot of these kind of local rumors during the Edo era. We don't know if Oiwa san really was washed away here, but we know this kind of thing did happen. Its only a short bridge, but its got this kind of history going back to the Edo era.

J: ???*1

T: Actually, I used to live around here.

J: Ehh? Why in such a frightful place?

T: It was cheap.

J: Is this in Shinjuku ward?

T: No, its in Toshima ward.

J: Oh, Toshima?

T: Just on the verge of Shinjuku.

K: It says Shinjuku here.

T: Yes, but..Oh, the other side is Toshima.

J: Where we are stood now is Shinjuku. Its next to Waseda, right?

T: Should we cross the bridge?

K: Yeah, lets cross it.

6:50 J: The river is pretty, isn't it?

(*Next is short exchange about the sakura leaning into the river, and execution spot over on the other side, which I can't make out clealy due to them all facing away from the mic, and very loud traffic passing simultaneously*)

T: So you see, this place is very historic.

J: It makes a shiver run down your spine when you think of it.....*shudders*. Sorry, its just being in this place.

K: Ok, should we head to the next spot?

J: Yeh, should we go?

K: Its a different place next.

*In the suburbs*

7:46 K: Where is this?

J: Here in Bunkyō Ward, they call this place Nezucchi (*The name of a comedian who is good at tellIng riddles*)

T: Nezucchi?

J: Haha

K: He lost it. haha

J: Sorry, Im embarrassed now, haha. Well, actually, they call this area Yanasen/谷根千, which is the neighborhoods of Yanaka, Nezu, and Sendagi together, and we are in Nezu today. Its a very quiet surburban area, but this place was voted for by a listener, or rather a user, as a good mystery spot. We recieved this email, so Kaoru could you read it out?

K: (*reading*) Its from 'Yasubeniisann'. It says, 'This is quite famous, but in Nezu there is a haunted staircase. When you go up the stairs there are 40 steps, but going down, there are only 39'....Um..did..

J: We already spilled the mystery.

T: Yeah.

J: Well, we already spilled the mystery , but yes, this is what we are going to see. A mysterious set of stairs. Lets go.

8:49 K: (*approaching the stairs*) Right up to the top, yeah? Not half way?

J: Yeah, I think right up to the top.

K: Both sides are the same, right?

J: Seems like it. Which side is the way up?

K: Eh? You could go up either side, right?

T: You mean like on an escalator where one side is up and one side is down.

J: Should we try counting the steps?

K: You're too eager, haha.

T: Which side should we do, the right side?

J: No, lets go with the left side.

T: Like in Kantō.

J: Yep, Kantō style.

K: Ok, Im gonna start.

J: Ok...1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7....

9:57 K: (*reaching the top of the staircase*) 39 steps.

J: 39? Yep I got 39 too. And next, if we go down..

T: On that side?

K: Will it be 39?

(*They walk downstairs *)

K: (*Reaching the bottom*) Eh?

T: Wasn't that 40?

K: I got 39.

T: Huh?

J: Huh?! I got 39. You got 40?

T: Yeah, I got 40.

J: Eh?! Hang on, whats going on?

10:55 K: (*Re-reading the email*) It says there are 40 steps going up.

J: 40 going up?

K: Are they including this? (*points to first concrete step on level with the ground*)

J: Oh, is that it?

K: If they are including this..

J: Yeah, if thats included, then..

T: I see.

K: I'll try starting from this. (*starts going up*)

J: Maybe you're supposed to go up the other side.. I can hear you.

T: Im out of breath..

J: Oh, you're carrying the bag..

T: Its embarrassing, im out of breath.

J: Its this step, this one.

11:36 K: (*Gets to top of stairs*) Ah, I see.

J: (*Getting to top*) 40!

T: (*Starting from the bottom*) This is the first step, yeh? 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9....

J: Haha

T: Then across?

J: No, no, diagonally.

T:...38, 39, 40.

K: You included the very first step at the bottom, right?

T: Yes...huh?

K: Huh? Really? How come only I'm different?

12:30 T: (*Going down*) This is the first one. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6....... ....... 37, 38, 39, and this is 40.

K: You're not counting this one, are you? (*To J*) This one is ???*2

J: Ahh, thats the difference.

13:08 J: Do we count this one? Thats the problem. According to the email, there are 40 steps going up, and 39 going down.

K: Its like can you count this as 1..?

J: Yeah, thats it.

K: Im not sure.

T: Its raised by about 5cm.

K: Well, I mean...we'll digest that bread easily.

J: Haha, yeah, we can definitely say we exercised today.

T: Its been quite tough for the staff doing the filming.

J: Yeah, haha. While we were going up one by one, they were going up and down each time. But what is our verdict about this?

K: Was is right? If this is the first step?

J: Im pretty intrigued about this.

T: Well, let's give our answer here. To conclude.

J: As a last word?

T: Yeah.

J: Well, it depends on whether or not you count this as the first step. If you do count it, then there is 40 steps going up. But if you look over here, this side is barely elevated from the ground at all. So you end up taking the second level as the first step.

K: Yeah.

J: Thats it right? And back over here, the first step is more elevated, so you would make that number 1.(*Starts climbing*).1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6...

K: (*To T*) Ok, shall we go?

T: Yep, lets go. Bye Joe.... ... ... That was fun.

K: Yeh, it was. (*Too windy to make out what they are saying*)

T: I wonder if Joe is still doing it.

15:00 J: (*Coming downstairs*) They're not here? They left me. Hello? You two? What? There's no one here.

Takabayashi: That was 39.

J: Was it 39? So, yes, that means going up is 40 steps, and coming down is 39 steps. The others have already left, so if you'd like to try this, its in Nezu...the haunted staircase. Please come and have a go, get some exercise.

15:31 T: He didn't call out for us to wait, right? haha....... ... ... Haha, here he is.

J: ??? (*No idea what he means here*)

T: You didn't realise we'd gone?

J: No, I didn't. When I came down there was no-one there, so it was a bit lonely. I closed the segment by myself.

T, K: Hahaha

T: How about this haunted staircase?

J: What do you think, Kaoru?

K: There was no ghost.

J: There wasn't, was there.

K: Its more like a mistaken staircase.

J: Yeah.

T: Ah, I see. Haha. To be accurate, the mistaken first step.

J: Yeah. When you go up, the fist step on one side looks as if its slightly elevated, so..

T: Yeah. We could go looking for other mysteries like this.

J: Yeah, lets solve them all!

K: So it seems as if we can use this one then.

J: Ah, thats good! We didnt waste our effort. So, if anyone knows any other mysteries that we could solve..?

K: Yeh, anything is ok, just let us know.

J: We'll solve them.

K: Ok, well, we can finish here. Please subscribe. Thank you very much.

*1,2 Couldn't catch.

#dir en grey #the freedom of expression #tfoe #kaoru #薫

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