#yeah canon ruin is a bitch he can go fuck himself

[n3-x-us]

I'm slowly collecting a bunch of ruins yet refuse to grab canonical ruin

I've got Cosmos and Jigsaw (infected ruin) which are from ameliorate

Theres Eris which is from the actor au if he was in it

Theres my friends au ruin (cat husbands au by @/sammyixx) whos also called Cosmos

Theres a ruin alteration where he was forced to make eclipse he doesn't have an actual name yet he just exists

I might make a lord cosmos one but then again idk i don't have the motivation so hes just like the ruin alteration

Uhmmhmhmrjegye i think thats all for now

Its basically the spiderverse but with cosmos at this point

OH AND THERES THE HUMAN AU OF AMELIORATE

[supernova41st]

Friday night night funkin dating hcs!!

Warnings: Some nsfw stuff but nothing too far, boob grabbing, bra stealing, nudes but not rlly

A/n: I HAVE ANOTHER OBSESSION UGHHH, anyways!! I’m so happy the fandom is reviving bc of the new update ahh. Also I didn’t rlly know what to put for bc so apologies if you wanted more of him :(

Keith (bf):

He’s such a flower sniffer istg

He’s like a rosy cheeked sweetheart who brings you heart chocolate every time he visits you

No but actually he’s wrapped around your fingers, it’s scary.

His fav dates are you and him alone at his house watching Godzilla movies and laying his head against your stomach while you play with his hair

AND YOU WEAR HIS HAT

Sometimes you’ll send a pic of you in his boxers that he left at your house just to tease him

But whenever he feels silly (which is all the time) he’ll send a picture of him in your bra for funsies

“I can do that too :D”

“0_•”

Keith is such a nerd, playing video games with him is your go to date

You guys would always match, like whenever you two play Mario kart he’d be toad and you’d be toadette

You hype him up sm, esp when playing Fortnite 😭

Y’all know that one Tik tok audio that goes

“Yeah get his ass FUCKING PUSSY TRY THE FUCK AGAIN BITCH, TRY THE FUCK AGAIII”

You do that, and it scares him.

His fav activity? Pot + cartoons.

You guys are the silliest couples ever. Laughing at SpongeBob with fog all over the room until your ribs start to hurt.

“Babes.. do you think that like-Starfires armpits are also pink?”

“…woah”

Pico:

Now when pico first starting dating you he thought you were just another chick to stuff his wiener in.

But soon enough, you guys were both wrapped around each others finger.

He’d kill for you tbh

Pico canonically has abs, so he likes it whenever he’s chilling with you and you just poke/rub them. He thinks it’s the cutest AND hottest shit ever

This man cannot get enough of your boobies, whenever he’s on his phone he’d have his arm around you and casually use your boob as a stress ball.

Sometimes he’ll just steal your bras whenever you’re showering or changing, just so that he can get a fresh look at ‘his girls’ (that’s what he calls them)

“Pico!! Have you seen my bra?”

“Hm? Na babe, I’m js here.”

This sly fuckin ginger

Most of his dates consist of going to his fav burger joint or sleeping over at each others houses

He esp loves the second one cuz he gets to makeout with you, prob his fav thing to do in this life.

Whenever you guys leave any function, like ever, he’ll yell out your ship name as he leaves the room 😭

“Pi-y/n, OUT”

“Babe you don’t have to do that every time we leave..”

Also his dad (Tankmen) loves embarrassing him in front of you.

(Tankmen) “Yeah so Pico kept pissing himself in the bed until 7th grade, shit had me concerned but turns out it was just normal puberty shit.”

(You)“Oh..”

“Dad I’m gonna kill you.”

Lmao he did eventually

Darnell

Darnell has such a big ego on being a ‘cool tough guy’, but when it comes to you it entirely washes away

It embarrasses him whenever he’s around his friends and you come over and start smooching him all over his face, getting lipgloss/lipstick all over him

“Mwah mwah mwah!!”

“B-baby. Babe, you’re ruining my aura.”

But he loves showing you off, you’re like his biggest flex. Whenever he hangs with his friends he always shows pictures of you like you’re his newborn

“Yeah so this is when we went to the skate park the other week and-“

“Dude. This is like the 5th picture you’ve shown me of them.”

Once for Valentine’s Day, he surprised you by spray painting an entire wall of you smooching him. (But like in the style of the fnf stickers they sell)

You were in such awe, you almost cried.

He was so embarrassed to show you at first, but when he saw how much you loved it he was so relieved

You and Nene are such besties

Like, squealing while talking about boys besties

“HII Y/N!!! :33”

“OMG HEY NENE!! ^^”

So when she found out you had a crush on Darnell, she was so excited

You guys became delusional abt him together, like

“NENE TODAY DARNELL LOOKED AT ME”

“STOPP HE WANTS YOU SO BADD”

“IKR”

O and your weapon (cuz everyone in picos friendgroup has one) is a broken glass bottle of whatever your fav drink is

Sometimes you’ll throw in a burning rag in there to make a Molotov cocktail

Also I hc that Darnell has thick silver rings and you love how they feel against your neck whenever you guys are smooching.

He lets you wear them at times but they always slip off because our boy has some THICK fingers.

[redflagshipwriter]

Halfa Cass 9 part 3

Masterpost

TW for canon-typical violence under the read more, minor character death

Unfortunately, there was so only so much Danny could stretch out his production process when Brick started hovering over his shoulder. Brick didn’t seem that bright, if Danny was honest. But he was clearly on the lookout for foot-dragging. 

That meant Danny was mostly done with the outer casing on the second cannon when Brick looked up abruptly and cursed. Brick pulled a gun out of his pocket and pointed it at Danny.

Danny was still busy soldering metal and it took him a few seconds to parse that he was supposed to be under threat right now. He blinked at Brick. “...Sorry, what?”

“Sack of shit!” Brick cursed, lip curled up. His silly little mustache rotated and stuck out at a weird angle. His eyes were wild. “Who did you tell?”

Danny shrugged awkwardly. Should he like, pretend he was afraid of the gun? Should he defend himself? He looked down at his soldering gun. Um. He probably, uh, shouldn’t… use that on Brick, right? It wasn’t like the guy could do anything to him.

Brick jabbed the gun further into Danny’s personal space. Brick’s head exploded with red mush.

Danny blinked.

Brick slumped to the floor. The gun clattered away. Blood gushed furiously across the floor and immediately ruined Danny’s shoes. Fuck. Brick’s soul sputtered in consideration of evolution. It pulsed, once, twice, and then harmlessly dissolved, passing onto the next life without all the drama of becoming restless dead.

…Lucky.

Danny turned off the soldering gun and pushed up the protective eye mask he had on for work with a disgusted grunt. Between that and the breathing protection, there wasn’t much of Brick on him except in his hair. Oh. No. He made a face and wiped at his forehead with the back of a sleeve before anything could get into his eyes. Brick was dripping down his forehead, nasty!! 

A gun cocked. “Yeah, yeah,” Danny acknowledged. He huffed and leaned over to grab at a shop rag. “Ugh!” He did his best to clean up. “This is gross. Just plain gross,” he bitched.

Footsteps walked down the metal stairs. “You work for me now,” said someone else that Danny had never seen before. Bigger guy. Older, ugly. He was balding and slightly gone to seed. Danny wasn’t exactly charmed.

Danny grunted. “My rate is 70 an hour,” he said. It had been 50 for the last group, but clearly his reputation had gone around enough for him to be recruited.

The gun pressed up against his forehead. “No, it’s not.” 

“Yeah, it fucking is, and I need $14 right now to go to the laundromat.” Danny made a gimme gesture. He ignored the gun to his head and jutted his chin out, ready for an argument. “You’re going to get rid of that, right? I do not do body disposal. I don’t have relevant expertise. That would be a sucky reason to get caught by the cops.”

The thug laughed. He put his gun back in his pocket and casually kicked at the recently emptied body. “I like you, kid,” he said genially. “Sure. I’ll tell the boss your rate. And I can get your laundry done. Don’t want your Mom to see you covered in blood?” He laughed again, like the thought of a teenager having to hide their criminal involvement was somehow funny.

Danny shrugged, not quite willing to lie that the feeling was mutual. This guy seemed like a dick.

“What’s this?” The new guy started nosing through the worktable, getting his grubby hands all over Danny’s beautiful new bazooka. He hefted it up and pointed it at Danny with a mean little smile. “What’s this do?”

Danny tried very hard not to go stiff. For the very first time, it occurred to him that he might be walking a little too close to the fire by making weapons that he could be harmed by. “Matter displacement tech,” he said casually. “Works on shit like doors.”

“Doors, huh.”

“Yupp.” 

At this range, it would displace most of Danny’s torso. He tried not to calculate how many days it would take him to regenerate from a hit like that.

The man lifted his eyebrows, but he put the bazooka back down. “You’re pretty unflappable, kid,” he commented. He rifled through Danny’s odds and ends with a careless hand, messing up the neat organization. “Once you’ve finished that, I’ll come back and pay you for it… How many work days is one of these things?”

“Takes about two days to do one solo, can get two done in three days,” Danny said tonelessly. 

His new contact grunted. “We’re going to need weapons from you next,” he said, as if it was just a fact.

“I don’t do weapons,” Danny said. He shrugged. “Sorry, it’s just not my specialty. I can get you the list of specs for what I can do, though, I–”

“You can do weapons,” he got cut off. The older man gave him a disdainful look. “Your girlfriend’s a co-ed, yeah? Cutie. Gotta work like a big man to keep her paid up.” He clapped Danny on the shoulder. “Be smart. I'll send someone to clean up.” He turned on his heel and left.

Danny stood there, taking a few moments to buffer that bullshit. The penny dropped.

‘Ew. Jazz?! They think I’m dating Jazz? That’s nasty.’

…Wait.

‘Oh, fuck. He knows about Jazz. They’re threatening Jazz.’

[whoishotteranimepolls]

Fandom Observation Funny tags: One Piece The Emperors & Crew

Due to character limits, the funny tags post has had to be broken up into multiple parts

This part contains the tags for the Red Hair Whitebeard, Blackbeard, Big Mom, and Beast Pirates. Plus Cross Guild. Enjoy because you guys really outdid yourself

The Red Hair Pirates

Benn Beckman: "Dilf," "retirement blorbo", "Benn Beckman is a religious experience", "to me? beckman is the character with the most sex appeal ever. raw sex appeal. I would [redacted] if I met this man. just sayin", "He can ruin my life any day of the week", "Also lest we forget pre TS Beck a++ quality right there I just want someone smart who will also hit a guy with a gun is that so much to ask for", "This p**** wants what she wants and its always going to be Benn “back breaker" Beckman", husband material, "men are like wine in order to get a good vintage you want the one that's aged", he had that sexy blind and reckless loyalty about him", "Beckman is a fine aged vintage of wine as men should be", "DEAR GOD the things I WOULD DO to that man LIKE [redacted] and [redacted] because [redacted] and [redacted]", "idk how to explain it but he's so wife", "benn beckman? more like benn breastman ok sorry yeah anyways. said it before and ill say it again beckman exudes raw sex appeal like jesus christ. why would you not want to fuck this man ive had lesbian friends who said he would be an exception to them which is so real his tits are big he loves his captain he STUBBED HIS CIGARETTE IN A MAN'S EYE UNDER THE GUISE OF DEFENDING HIS CAPTAIN so fucking sexy mwah mwah beckman my wife you are so hot SO HOT. in conclusion benn breastman you will forever be a top sexyguy in my head oh also forgot to add. he canonically gets bitches which is so real. he could get me any day", "Oh dear I just realised I have a thing for older men with grey hair and have substance abuse issues I choose to believe lung cancer does not exist in opu", "Live action Benn looks like that one uncle no one wants to invite to the family reunion but has to anyway because the grandparents insisted” “Benn Fine Fucking Vintage Beckman cannot believe OPLA boxed that fine ass wine what were they thinking I'd happily spend hundreds of dollars for Becky but no they had to pawn him off as a cheap $20 boxed wine probably powdered and needs to be reconstituted yes i am that bitter this was the only bad casting call they had in S1 never forgive never forget” “I honestly loved that they made beckman just some guy you could pass on the street and not look twice at in the live action but… he's definitely not hot” “really I think mid-40s is the sweet spot for Beckman#hair is kinda salt-and-peppery; not quite black but not quite silver I cast my vote for pre-ts bc I didn't think he'd get enough votes and I like the way he looks” “I bet he's hiding a Special kind of Sea King in his pants too” “DAMN RIGHT ! my man is PACKING !” “ He should demand child support from Rayleigh because if it weren't for him, Shanks probably would have ended up dead of his drunken stupidity a long time ago under his watch. He only lost one arm, and that's because Shanks ran off by himself and was left unsupervised for 5 minutes. That's not Benn's fault.” “

Shanks: Margaritaville Himbo, "Dilflicious", "the deadbeat malewife wifi user", "I am a whole lesbian but if there were a butch girl version of these men I would let shanks ruin my life", "favorite guy in the local frat" He's probably a walking STD risk but he's hot and I'm a slut that has a thing for red heads, "the unwashed bitch", "LOOK AT THAT SCRUFF ON SHANKS the three scars on his face that smile", "my Scrungle drunk bastard", I would volunteer to be his next baby mama you know shanks got a few a dozen red haired children all over the grand line tell me I'm wrong" “early shanks is perfect in my heart he's a rapscallion!!! he looks like he giggles,” “Post Time Skip Shanks is a daddy Live action shanks feels like a goofy dad/uncle,” “ In sorry but shanks looks like markiplier” “sorry shanks your ex husbands winning this one” “I think Shank's actor is WAY hotter as a brunette” “seriously though la shanks looks like a wet rat even more than his anime counter part” “I'm voting shanks he's just so… what a dream of a man. you know?” “shanks can’t be hot his good looks don’t make up for his personality” “shanks because he would make a good dad had his ass been able to keep kids” “Shanks having the least amount of votes is actually breaking my heart it's okay Shanks I love you” “confession i lowkey dislike shanks MOTHING AGAINST HIM PERSONALLY but like the fandom treatment of him he is EVERYWHERE and does NOTHING until the wano flashbacks (his most screentime untill egghead) i did not care about him sorry” “heh lol eat dirt Shanks (this user has nothing against Shanks except that he's always beating her faves)” “shanks sweep! idk anything about one piece other than i want to fuck him probably other stuff too” “why is shanks winning. basic ass website” “still going feral over shanks” “how many times must shanks make that cheap copy bite the dust” “after this weeks episode my hot for Shanks is at an all time high sooooo👀👀one arm daddy wins this time” “dejectedly picks shanks because at the end of the day i am a fag with problems i like my men horribly unwell” “He's the biggest fuckboy to ever whore about the grand line” “Shanks got absolutely everything from Rayleigh. Swordsmanship, haki mastery, a knack for epic entrances, ugly pants, bisexuality, and a slutty, slutty lifestyle across the Grand Line. Sorry to Roger, but the kid clearly took after the other father.” “'m shocked Beckman hasn't put that boy on a leash yet oh im damn sure beck has put that guy on a leash ifykwim” “Some of us are just complete sluts, and we're totally okay with that. I'm fully self-aware, and I totally would volunteer to be Shanks's baby mama. People have been talking about the implications of devil fruits in the bedroom. I want to know if Haki has bedroom misuses.” “I would volunteer to be the maid, especially if it comes with a cute slutty maid outfit. I bet Shanks would go feral for that, and again, I'm self-aware that I'm a total ho. Plus, I wouldn't care as long as I'm getting railed by the Daddy Emperor of the Sea every night” “Dorky Shanks my beloved” “HE CANONICALLY GETS BITCHES i genuinely think only cavendish has been shown to get a bigger amount of groupies (female that is) (sanji got the whole of the g5 but thats another story) anyway my point is shanks is the most fuckable one piece character and has been since day one he was raised by silvers fucking rayleigh what else could he have turned out to be” “least my failman Shanks came in second” “

Yasopp: “VOTE AGAINST YASOPP PLEASE cause that man deserves nothing... >_> if yasopp has no haters im dead”

Cross Guild

Buggy: Assigned clown at birth, walking disaster, "my pathetic sniveling wet clown", my Beloved, "he has blue hair and pronouns", Failboy, "the skrunkly clown", "my clown wife", "he has that fail boy cringe", "buggy has the stronger levels of foolishness and fumbling his way to success", "the cringefail clown extraordinaire buggy", "he is silly and pathetic like a bisexual divorced dad",“WHY? WHY ISN'T HE WINNING? nobody here understands anything” “ know the op poll guidelines say to be kind and now belittle others for their opinions but fucking seriously ARE Y'ALL BLIND y'all have no taste none whatsoever i am ashamed and appalled vote for buggy god damnit VOTE FOR THE CLOWN the VERY HOT IRRESISTIBLE BABY GIRL CLOWN” “buggy is prettier if that makes sense#look at those lashes!” “yall dont get buggy like i do i fear” “live action buggy is succhhh a freak hes so incredibly hot its almost distracting from his greatness” “voted live action but goddamn did impel down buggy make me confused it's the scruff and the gorgeous ponytail” “YEEEEESSS buggy the clown ImpelDown!Buggy HOTTEST BUGGY yes yes yes FUCK YEAH impel down buggy i wanna manhandle that stupid disillusioned cruel manaiacal idealist clown by his beautiful ponytail i would ruin that stupid clown your honor i love him” “Out the way flame boy I’m bout to get that clown cock” “watched 4 whole episodes of one piece for buggy” “BUUGGGGYYY sorry he makes me feral” “Buggy was robbed.” “Ok so Buggy is a wet pathetic loser who fails upwards and somehow gets exactly what he wants in the worst way possible” “He came the closest to killing Luffy before Kaido. He has so much negative rizz it circled around to most eligible bachelor. Crocodile and Mohawk use him as a punching bag. He's Shanks's The One That Got Away” “Oh and he can detach his dick (and hands, and head, and tongue…)” “i dont go here but why does everyone wanna fuck the clown i dont understand l” “where are my clownfuckers at buggy is hot as hell don’t let society tell you otherwise he is literally THE sexy gender-nonconforming loser with blue hair and pronouns” “

Crocodile: desert daddy, Babygirl, "He's like if tony soprano was trans", crocodaddy, crocomommy, Big titty mob boss, He's 8ft tall and I would let he ruin me,"Mr. Sandman", "the human sandcastle," "literally has sand in his britches", "son of a beach", "World's Most Expensive Sand Sculpture", "he's got 99 problems and his hook is one of them", "casino blorbo", "I would subject myself to sandburn any day for THE SIR FUCKING CROCODILE Anakin Skywalker don't go here because I WOULD love sand if it was like 8 feet tall and had a voice like that absolutely rabid he could stick his sand in so many places and I'd thank him crocodile is one of those guys i wanted to hate so bad and then went actually no i want this guy carnally Crocodile has some weird rizz goin on and i need to climb that sandcastle", "I'm so sorry but I need to eat crocodile's pussy", "With Sir Crocodile you can have Sex on the Beach. Literally. Plus he owns a casino so you could probably sip on the cocktail version too...while getting some cocktail.", "mafia vibes and style", "crocodile's got style. class. you will be wined and dined in the most exquisite way you can imagine", "He's got DADDY vibes", " One handsome mafia boss", "I love crocodile but also i wanna punch him and i feel like hes got the sandiest pussy/dick that shit will give me a rash", "my evilest baby boy", "Crocodile invented evil trans swag just saying", "im sorry az but crocodile was my dilf awakening", "in Crocodilf we trust", “i want crocodile to put that out on me” “those rings on his big fingers are the icing on the sandy cake for me” “You can throw me into horny jail all you want but Toei did not do Crocodile any justice, manga Croc is fine as hell, a handsome middle aged sonovabitch and I swear to god by the time I'm done with him that man will be pregnant again” “He's a trans desert king and I love him. I have no other defense” “What you would get is a 8'4" dom with a cool ass style(dude had a whole outift change in impel down just cause LOL). Anon is so right tho, he really is a bond villian type huh? That's a great description ngl 😂” “Big tall sexy transmasc, need I say More” “croc is my virgo king I MUST choose him” “Mr. Sandman is very handsome despite turning into beach herpes. Look if glitter is craft herpes then sand is beach herpes” “

Mihawk: The Vampire Pirate, Goth Dad, the sword father, Pirate Dracula, the big titty goth husband, "I think mihawk would treat you right. i want mihawk to treat me right", "I love his gay wine uncle energy", "I appreciate that he dresses Like That everywhere extra ass bitch", "hot vampire cowboy pirate", Morticia Addams, "Mihawk oozes 'step on me' energy", “ow wow i really don't like mihawk in the live action i mean he's great and funny and terribly camp and reminds me of snagglepuss so i guess he fits a tumblr hotbod to a t!” “mihawk has the most ridiculous moustache known to man” “live action Mihawk was so my type in looks it was like a personal attack” “see if it was a picture of his slutty pants i might have voted for mihawk” “queuecifer” “seeing them side by side. you gotta give credit to the live action. thats just the same dude” “sorry this time it's the la the mustache just looks so much more ridiculous in live action and i love that a man who deliberately and on purpose cuts his facial hair like that is someone i have GOT to bang immediately” “dracule EASY” “everybody likes the fucking twink the most” “see, for me the reason that mihawk is hot is because he'd totally be a pillow princess which means that i'd be able to either 1) ride his face till i pass out, 2) ride his dick till i cant walk, or 3) fuck him till i cant walk. he also has cute eyes and is 'working for' one of the stupidest men to ever sail the seas” “idk man what can i tell you. dracule mihawk vampire sexy” “mihawk my beloved ❤️” “ My autistic goth dad who doesn't know how to use an air fryer”

The Whitebeard Pirates

Ace: "Depressed sunshine orphan boy with daddy issues", "ace has that grungy line cook riz you know he lays legendary pipe", " he got goofy older brother swag", "Beautiful butch dyke wife", "Ace my greasy fire narcoleptic king", "The narcoleptic babygirl", the greasy crusty desert rat. "He would be worth the burn risk", "my favorite fire donut", "something about greasy alabasta ace hits so different", "with his riz he's probably a walking STD risk but it would be worth it. Just look at him probably also probably got a couple bastard kids running around the grand line", it's ok he's still greasy in my heart worlds most feral baby boy he looks like he eats dirt I could fix him (force him to bathe regularly)" “ace has to win every* time he’s LITERALLY FIRE *excluding cases where the opponent is a similar if not more incendiary material” “i am but a sheep i voted ace bc he is my cinnamon apple” “I mean, literally? Ace. Guy's literally made of fire, course he's the hottest.” “this is a trick question obviously it's Fire Fist Ace who can literally turn into fire” “Ace is automatically hottest because he's made of fire.” “ace brainrot is real rn I clicked him so fast” “pfffftt ace's about to be put six feet under again the way he has more votes than the rest combined” “freshly made donut straight from the fryer” “ace is so hot he melted a hole is his - i mean my - heart. he's so hot that he can touch lava and live- i mean he can touch lava. Once. ace is so hot that he turned into a funeral pyre!!!!! ace is so hot his brothers had to get burned just compete ace is so hot he took fire fist literally!!! he took that phrase right to the chest!!! ace is so hot his necklace melted right off of him. ace is so hot everybody just HAD to watched him get fisted on live television. snail vision? Idk okay im done now maybe” “Ace my special little greasy fucked up guy!!! traumatized twunk who may have rabies but it’s ok” “sorry i have to vote for my greasy rat husband ♡” “I see my guy. I vote for him. simple. anyways vote Ace” “ace obliterate this man” “greasy dumpster fire man gotta get the vote” “ace my love my darling my greasy stoner sweetiepie mi chacalito hermoso the light of my life and my blunts” “

Marco: Bird daddy "Mr. Dr. Emotionally-Stable Scrungles", "surfer hippy electric blue glasses wing flapper", "DR. MMMMM", Fineapple" “Marco my favourite little bird. (/∀＼)” “Marco, my love, my darling bird, you won't win - but that's okay, cause you'll always be my 1 <3 /blushes like some little school girl/ don't look at me right now I'm being lovey dovey” “Ah, my sweet bird, you're in a poll with a lot of really hot guys, but that was still an easy vote for me <3” “MARCOOOOOOOO he's a very mild “hear me out” but he's one of mine nonetheless” “Marco!!! everyone sleeps on my favorite old man birb but that’s ok I know the truth” “marco the phoenix also im losing my mind at his talons” “Oh I would be so grateful for some love for my well-toned and taloned retirement blorbo <3” “pls vote marco he's insanely hot” “

Izou: “the things I would do to get izou to shove his gun up my ass…” "Izo is absolutely my type.” “DUDEEEE IZOU PRETTIEST MAN ALIVE IZOU genuinely i would take izou over ace <- unpopular opinion but oughhhh. he. I” “

The Blackbeard Pirates

Blackbeard: “i find Blackbeard so fucking attractive for reasons not even i can explain” “The thing is, who's those 1 percentage that vote for Blackbeard like fr what did you see??😭” “blackbeard wins by virtue of being the sole bhm here. i know he did all those other things but its fine. its okay.” “

Catarina Devon: "my problematic lesbian sugar mommy”

The Big Mom Pirates

Amande: “lowkey obsessed w amande she was soooo cool for the seconds she was on-screen 🥲”

Big Mom: “kinda unfair that Linlin got a picture of her milf phase” “young big mom has to be cheating. voted for her anyway though” “young Linlin is fine as hell tho so she takes it” “you used a picture of YOUNG big mom so yeah it's her hot damn” “

Cracker: "if Cracker just let his hair down he'd be unstoppable i fear", "get wrecked cracker", "I am so curious about the people voting for cracker let me study you please", "cracker getting murdered as expected", "you can't do my biscuit husband like that", "i find cracker really hot"

Daifuku: “power dresser daifuku leads look at those padded shoulders”

Katakuri: "I'm a monsterfucker at heart", "Katakuri is literally so good man he's a family man #he's badass he's got a great sense of honour you know I had to go for the mochi man", "donut king", "KATAKURI MY MOCHI MONSTER TEETH KING CHAMPION HUSBAND THAT I WOULD CLIMB LIKE A MOUNTAIN #I'M ALWAYS ON MY CLIMBING AGENDA WITH MY ONE PIECE KINGS!", "i just know this man would treat me right we love kata", "Kata definitely ticks that hot box" “my giant self conscious doughnut loving beloved” “I could fix him I swear” “To clarify, Katakuri is sixteen feet, eight and a half inches tall. Let that sink in.” “I must defend the donut man” “

Perospero: ”lololol you guys are wrong like look at Perospero what that tongue do😏” “Perospero looks like a dog whose front teeth have been removed and I can't unsee that”

Praline: “ok everyone i'm gonna need a praline sweep RIGHT NOW shes simply perfect”

Smoothie: "ah...smoothie....or as i call her... one piece tsunade Imaoo", "ultimately my desire to be crushed by Smoothie's thighs won out", "SMOOTHIE. THANK YOU mommy long legs... gauhggfghgh......i want her to juice me pleeeeaaaseeeeeeeeeee /silly", “no lady in this poll is prettier than Smoothie. She's got them fine legs that go for days.” “SMOOTHIE MY GIRL U MAY NOT PULL THRU BUT YOULL ALWAYS BE MY FAV” “

The Beast Pirates

Black Maria: “i’m absolutely terrified of spiders but black maria EASILY”

Kaido: "beefcake beast of a man",

King: "King is literally the most beautiful OP character you can't change my mind", "Gotta chose the melanin yknow", "king is so ajdhjdjdjchjd bark bark bark bark", "I saw King and decided he is my blorbo", "king of my [REDACTED]", " I know he's like 20 ft tall and I'm probably the size of his d*** but it would be worth it. I would gladly choose death by snu snu for one night with him" “king is the source of the uhhh. govt weapon fuel source aint he i feel like that gives him hot dominion also: sexiest” “have y'all already forgotten how everyone's brains short-circuited when king's face was revealed shame on you” “its king. no contest no question. i am a slut for a brown man w long hair and i know this about myself” “im a lesbian but king honestly” “king cake IS my favorite kind of cake i'm very proud of that one” “honestly i think king might be the hottest guy oda's ever made” “I mean when king took off his mask for the first time I said out loud 'oh my god he's beautiful'. So.” “I think you’re forgetting that he’s a dark-skinned anime character. We don’t get a lot of those, so they get lapped up like an oasis in the desert” “he dick woudl rip me in half, and that is not something i am interested in’ COWARDICE” “my acearo ass would climb this man like a fucking tree” “Nahhhh this man is a delicious chocolate milkshake 🥵💕😍 I'd climb that 20 foot tree like my life depended on it. Yeah the dinosaur fruit is kind of 🤷‍♀️ but oh well!  That skin, that hair them black fluffy wings are everything. He's so handsomee plussss I'd love to run my fingers through that long hair 😍💕” “His face is carved by the angels themselves” “I need king to **** ******* ****** ***** *** **** **** ** ****” “haha u funny. fire...anyway its King when u simp over someone from One Piece and find out theyre 20 ft tall” “right off the bat king is my fourth pick here. it's a three way time with the other three sorry king he's just. like he's very pretty yes but there's a difference between pretty and hot king is just pretty. ur not winnin today buddyboy” “

Solitaire: “SOLITAIREEEEE GUYS I SWEAR SHES SO FINE IM IN LOVE W HER SHE CAN CHOKE ME W THOSE 6 ARMS I MEAN WHOSAIDTHAT”

[weebsinstash]

I'd be judging the hell out of Mom!Reader for naming her twins GABRIEL and GABRIELLA!!!! (Not judging her that much for instigating Miguel to get me or something, I mean. Stockholm syndrome is a bitch. and also. I get it, the power of big d and all that stuff) GIRL. That's the SAME NAME!!!!!

Smh there's so many beautiful names in spanish but MomReader and Miguel 2 are lacking in the creativity department.

Miguel over here watching Mom!You being so radiant and joyful while showing off her chunky babies and he's sending sly glances to you, lowkey being a snob as he thinks "OUR babies would have much better names" and before he knows it he's building up this little fantasy in his head by accident. He keeps hearing these little stories or details from the other you and the other him and in his head he keeps thinking of what he would've done, how he thinks it would've gone for you and him, and you two are not even in a relationship. In fact depending on how drawn out this gets, you haven't even been in the Spider Society for several weeks and are at home with no intention of ever coming back, heartbroken, alone

I even thought of "what if an afab Reader got so desperate to escape canon and have freedom again that she gets pregnant by a stranger and literally carries a full pregnancy so she can abandon the baby, because the kid will eventually become a Spider and maybe they'll take over the canon and then you'll be able to do whatever you want" because you're just. You're so upset that canon is controlling your life and basically like ENSLAVING you that you're desperate

Lmao Peter B sneaks back to see you even though he isn't supposed to and finds you, he's ecstatic, "oh my god you're SUPER pregnant!" and he knows he isn't supposed to see you but he zips it and goes back home and, months later he visits you again with gifts, "so where's the baby?" "I dunno, where IS the baby? :)"

Would the baby technically be an anomaly since you weren't supposed to have it, not like this? What if they had to get rid of it to re-stabilize the timeline or whatever? Now you're being EXTRA shunned because, "wow you went through all that just for yourself huh 🙄 you'd rather abandon a baby than get married..." like people just beyond appalled with you, meanwhile you feel extra victimized because, wow that was all for nothing, you're trying to rethink strategies since "the contigency" didn't work out.

Or less dark but imagine dumping that kid and then some time later you're invited back to the Spider Society and it's like "oh hey Miguel what's the deal with this random baby you're taking care of" and you don't even recognize it, don't even know, you didn't even look at it hard enough to ever really know what it looked like, and, well, WE know whose baby it is lmao. You thinking you escaped from it and it's off living its own life and is going to someday free you and they, maybe not even realizing your intentions and just thinking you were scared, are raising it to give it back to you. I'd go absolutely wild lmao. Their shock when you break it to them "I literally nicknamed it Connie as in contingency, I never even knew what sex it was, I never even fed it, oh my god get it out of here, you're ruining everything"

Miguel MAKING YOU raise it even if its like tbh a fucked up little accident, or, if it's the whole "anomaly baby's gotta go" situation, after the, uh, disposal, he realizes he's pushed you way too far and you're too stressed and scared to think and behave rationally anymore and THIS is where he basically assigns himself as your caretaker and eventually takes you for himself which is kiiiiiiiiinda for the best because you're losing it a little. Like idk I imagine with LYLA maybe he has her programmed to tell him his own canon or he can look at it himself but like, what if he avoided spoilers because he wanted his behavior with you to be authentic or whatever. Like Miguel 2 might let him know "yeah dude turns out we hook up with them in a lot of different universes, it's almost like a separate canon like Peter Parker having Mary Jane" and Miguel takes some sneak peeks at other realities and then he shuts himself off from it so he can move forward of his own accord, but he now knows a sort of guideline and maybe some things to avoid doing (he can see the reality where the YouTwo disaster is going down and he's like "I would NEVER make MY You feel replaced *acts like having Mom!You and Miguel2 around doesn't count, the denial is stored in his ass, that's why it's so big*")

He's got a little notebook or data log where he takes down notes and details on things you like, things he notices about you, things you do often, habits, favorite foods, favorite color, how often are you doing your laundry (he knows you keep re-wearing that bra, girl), are you making your bed, how well are you functioning. Jesus, he literally has technology that can recreate extremely hyperdetailed recreation simulations; if he isn't outright putting camera bots in your room, he can "recreate" however you've been spending your day. He can learn all your routines and rituals and habits, decide what things may be problems, what things you might need more of in your life, he's, studying you really, with a romantic and almost scientific obsession

Not to be all 50 shades of gray in here but would Miguel eventually come onto you, all pent up and control finally bursting, "if we were made for each other, you must like taking it as hard as I like to give it" and whether you want it or not he takes you, and your bodies feel like they fit together perfectly, he stretches you out and fills you up JUST right, you can't help but have your eyes roll into the back of your head with how good it is, and of course he used any good reactions out of you as an excuse/"sign" he's doing the right thing and to keep going, that you're consenting, that he's finally winning you over

Who know; the two of you might start having those babies faster than you both initially thought 😳

[colekinnie-4life]

Ranking Ninjago Seasons Pt 1 (F and D Tier)

Part 2…

Yeah, I’m doing this.

Why? I’m bored as shit and also I just reread a post that was ranking Ninjago seasons, so why not?

And the title of “Worst Ninjago Season in my Opinion” goes to….

Rebooted!

I hate this season.

It’s. So. Fucking. Boring.

Barely anything happens at all! In the 8 episode runtime, which makes this the second shortest Ninjago season from the Wilfilm era.

Ok first, positives.

Pixane is cute and Zane’s sacrifice was done excellently. His character is also made a bit better, which I appreciate.

Uh- we get 3 minutes of Lava interactions.

Welp time for my negatives!

This season takes forever to go anywhere, like I said. Then once they deal with the Overlord in the Digiverse, erm actually that did jack shit and he’s still alive by the way! Pythor just ate him!

(Now that I’m typing this out I sound crazy)

Lloyd and Garmadon’s story is done decently, sure, but Lloyd is a complete egotistical moron throughout the whole thing.

“Oh I’m the Golden Ninja I can do anything! I’m God himself!”

Sure he had the powers of God and he “destroyed” the Overlord in season 2, which kinda justifies his behavior, but he’s so annoying and unbearable to watch.

Sensei Garmadon is good. Nothing else to say about that plot line.

Time for the worse plot line, aka the stuff the main ninja are doing.

Honestly I barely remember what they were trying to do because of how forgettable this season is. I’m pretty sure that they’re just screwing around trying to get the Overlord out of the computers and keeping Lloyd away from him, but that’s all I remember besides…

THE LOVE TRIANGLE.

OH MY JOHN SPINJITZU.

I DESPISE THIS PLOTLINE WITH EVERY FIBER OF MY BEING.

THIS. THIS IS THE MAIN REASON I HATE REBOOTED.

It ruins Nya’s character, makes Jay unlikeable for this season, season 4 and the beginning of season 6, and Cole- I mean Cole’s not all that innocent but he’s just kinda standing in the middle of all this. His character doesn’t go through the meatgrinder of character assassination.

Nya’s whole character in the past 2 seasons was being an independent girlboss who did whatever the fuck she wanted.

But the second that a computer AI tells her “you should like Cole instead of Jay!”, she decides that “I’m gonna listen to a computer despite the fact I’ve been dating Jay for 2 seasons now!”

She and Cole have no chemistry whatsoever. In season 1, Cole said he wished he had a sister like her, clearly only seeing her as a friend.

Luckily in canon he was just confused by all the attention and didn’t actually like her. But still, the whole “don’t tell Jay” thing makes me mad, and Cole rarely makes me mad.

Jay, oh my gosh.

He’s not as bad as Nya but he’s still thrown into the meatgrinder of character assassination.

The second that Pixal says that Nya’s perfect match is Cole, he immediately pins the blame on him and tackles him to the ground for no reason. Cole was only fighting back for self defense.

As Tom Critic put it:

“WHY IS THIS COLE’S FAULT?!!”

He and Cole’s beef is so dumb. And Nya ain’t making it any better.

“This macho stuff is making you both look like fools!”

EVEN THOUGH ITS YOUR FAULT THEY’RE FIGHTING IN THE FIRST PLACE BECAUSE YOU LISTENED TO A FUCKING COMPUTER YOU BITCH-

*ahem ahem*

What else is there to hate about this plot line?

How about the fact that it goes absolutely nowhere? There was no point for adding this. Absolutely no reason besides the fact that Jay, Cole, and Nya don’t get anything to do this season.

EVEN THOUGH KAI DOESNT GET ANYTHING EITHER!

He’s shown to hate futuristic technology and that’s literally the only thing he gets this season! So what’s the point of the love triangle to get them to do something?

Oh yeah! There is no point!

Back to Kai. All he gets to do is flirt with a random girl at a gas station and get tied to a rocket.

Oh yeah he got tied to a rocket ship. That doesn't sound traumatizing whatsoever/sarc.

Waking up after being knocked out for who knows how long and finding out you're tied up underneath a rocket ship that could set off at any time, burning you to a crisp in one big firey explosion.

That totally wouldn't scar you for life.

Ok back to a positive, aka Zane's sacrifice.

Some people say the saddest part of Zane's death was the fact that Nya gave Cole a hug afterwards and Jay looks sad, but that's not the saddest part to me.

The saddest part was right before he died, when everyone is crying out at him to stop.

More specifically, when Kai cries out:

"LET GO OF HIM ZANE! WHAT IS HE DOING?!"

The way that Vincent Tong voiced that scene literally brings tears to my eyes and shivers down my spine every time. He poured so much energy into that oh my gosh.

Alright, no more complaining about this season before this becomes a 27 page essay. Next!

Crystallized…

WAIT WRONG POSTER-

Ok, there we go!

Yeah, Crystallized sucks in my opinion. Bite me.

I’m not like Crusty783 where I hate this season with every fiber of my being, but I still don’t like it that much.

First part was decent, ig. The Skybound callback with the whole fugitive storyline was a nice idea, and the ninja actually committing a crime instead of being framed was cool.

Nya could’ve come back a little later than 6 episodes after turning into water, but oh well. At least she’ll add something to the plot later, right?

…right?

(We’ll get back to that…)

Fugidove is the bane of my existence. He’s. So. Annoying. Just. Shut. The. Fuck. Up.

I mean he’s supposed to be annoying and I get that but still. He’s a worse character than Dareth and I hate Dareth with all of my being so that shows how bad of a character Fugi-Dick is.

Dareth is fine this season ig. He’s actually not an idiot during the court case and doesn’t try to bust the ninja out of jail using a cake.

What else is there in part 1?

Mr. Kabuki Mask was a neat idea. If he wasn’t Harumi then I’d actually like him. But unfortunately, it was Harumi.

I didn’t like her before she died, what makes you think I’ll like her now, ninjago writers?

Alright, since barely anything happens in part 1, time for part 2.

Oh my gosh this is the main reason I don’t like Crystallized.

This season is the embodiment of the meatgrinder of character assassination I talked about. Everyone gets butchered.

Ok not everyone. Kai, Jay, and Cole mostly stay the same. To be fair they don’t really do anything though-

Lloyd is no longer Lloyd. He is La-Lloyd, as Knightly called him after s8 (I don’t see what his problem is with Lloyd in season 8). He has the “Harumi you don’t have to do this”-itus, meanwhile when it comes to Garmadon who is TRYING TO BE A BETTER PERSON AND BECAME A GOOD GUY, he shuts him down because “you’re an Oni, and Oni are incapable of caring”.

(Even though Mystaké existed and she fucking died to save your life but ok La-Lloyd, sure.)

Like he thinks that Harumi, the girl that gave him PTSD for 4 seasons in a row before this, has a better chance of becoming a better person than his father, someone who is clearly becoming a better person and is actually trying to be nice to you now? Puh-lease.

Oh yeah, Harumi!

She got shoved into the character assassination blender before being put into the meat grinder. Her character is 100% ruined because of the Overlord saying she has feelings for La-Lloyd.

*inhale*

NO SHE FUCKING DOESN’T!

THAT WAS THE PART OF HER CHARACTER THAT MADE HER SO GOOD IN SEASONS 8-9! SHE DIDNT GIVE TWO SHITS ABOUT LLOYD SHE WAS JUST USING HIM GAHHHHHHHH-

Alright, who else is there?

Oh yeah, Nya! What’s she up to after being water for a full year?

Absolutely nothing. Like she does jackshit besides be a Samurai X themed taxi.

Yes I stole that line from Crusty783.

Her and Kai, her BROTHER, have one single interaction this whole season after she was gone for a year. The show only focuses on Jaya angst because we need more of that shoved down our throats! Seasons 6, 9, and 14 (Seabound, don’t @ me) weren’t enough, we need MORE!

Zane.

Return of the Ice Emperor makes me want to shove my head into a meatgrinder.

I fucking loathe this episode.

With a title like that, you’d think they’d give him some trauma/PTSD when it comes to the fact that he, y’know, COMMITTED GENOCIDE FOR 60 YEARS??

But no. Zane gets taken apart for the 10485792742874387492749273947482773747374387447th time and he acts like the Ice Emperor because this show treats trauma like a joke most of the time.

The whole “emotionless arc” from part 1 was decent ig. He was pretty funny when he was talking like a toaster, and the moment when he starts screeching when he turns on his emotions for 2 seconds was funny.

The Benefit of Grief was a good episode. Sally was a bit annoying but eh whatever. Dareth didn’t get on my nerves for once and Hot Dog McFiddlesticks or whatever his name was was really entertaining.

Ok, one more point to make about Crystallized, that’s the villain.

Say hello to the Crystal King!

Oh? What’s that? He’s not a new villain? What do you mean-

It’s the fucking Overlord. Again. This is the 3rd time he’s reappeared, just let him die already!

I hate the Overlord. He’s such a nothing burger of a villain. His entire motivation is just “I’m evil and dark so I make everyone else evil and dark.”

I get he’s the embodiment of evil but give him some personality, oh my gosh.

Make it so he likes seeing people in pain. Have him laugh whenever someone got turned into a crystal zombie or something, idk!

That’s how he is in my Golden Hope au. Sure that’s not canon, obviously, but I wanted to give him *some* personality besides “me evil.”

Ok, is there anything about this season that I like besides Benefit of Grief?

Actually, yes!

SAFE HAVEN IS THE BEST EPISODE OF THE ENTIRE SEASON.

LAVA NATION UNITE!!

The whole thing is just Kai being a bisexual disaster. I love it so much.

It gives us this screenshot, which gives enough context tbh:

It’s just “GAH I LOVE THEM SO MUCH” for 11 minutes, and that’s basically it.

The episode gives Skylor some character, hallelujah. Last couple of seasons she’s been in did not do her any justice.

Pythor was funny. And he gave us the scene of:

“Ninja~ where are you?”

“We’re over here!”

So yeah, Safe Haven is the best episode ever. Ok, not the best episode of all time, but it’s definitely a personal favorite of mine, solely for all the Lava brainrot I get to indulge in.

(Fun fact: Cole was originally going to say that Kai was handsome when he was acting all loopy. I hate homophobes.)

What else is there in this season-?

Ronin’s return was nice. Glad he went back to his previous personality rather than being a full time criminal like he was in The Island. I get that he’s like “I do whatever the fuck I want” most of the time, but he doesn’t give off the vibes of using the criminals he’s hired to catch just to swindle a bunch of islanders.

Alright, that’s it for Crystallized.

Next!

Secrets of Forbidden Spinjitzu: Fire Chapter

Yeah I’m considering this a separate season for this tier list. Bite me.

This is the main reason why (mostly) everyone hates season 11, you cannot convince me otherwise.

Nothing. Happens.

The main reasons for why I hate certain Ninjago seasons is because they’re boring/assassinate characters.

The latter doesn’t happen, thank the FSM, but the first point still stands.

Assphera is a dumb villain. Only redeeming quality about her is the joke where she screams “REVENGE” every two seconds in the most ear-splitting voice ever.

Props to her voice actress, RIP.

Anyways, back to the actual season.

Like I said, nothing happens in the beginning. Just 4 or 5 episodes of the ninja dicking around looking for something to do, then they free Assphera from her pyramid and then finally, they start doing shit.

Ok but this line from Lloyd made me laugh:

“Who opens a possibly cursed tomb without checking it out first?”

…you-?

The paperboy episode was- pointless. But it was still dumb fun ig 🤷🏼‍♀️

Snaketastrophe was a really funny episode. I actually like that one.

But that doesn’t mean I like the first couple of episodes.

Too many burp and fart jokes in the first episode, the second episode is just boring, same with all the other episodes about being stuck on a rock with Barney the Dinosaur Beetle.

Kai’s powerless arc was just a repeat of Lloyd’s powerless arc from season 9, but done worse imo.

(I mean Firemaker is one of the best ninjago episodes ever created besides Safe Haven but that’s not important rn)

Overall this half of the season is boring as shit and I just want to get to the ice chapter when ever I watch it.

Alright, that’s it for today!

Here’s the tier list so far:

Next part will be C and B tiers.

See you in 10 years when I make that/j

[kunosoura]

top 5 ships

I'm not a huge nerd for like sailing/space flight/etc so when we're talking ships the ones I like the most are more for what they Represent. So in no particular order:

The S.S. Stormborn from Naddpod, I just love the story beat of an orphan learning about his parents and taking up his father's place on the helm of his old ship

The Bebop (and every scifi ship that's like "this is a piece of shit like fishing/shipping/industrial ship converted for use as both a home and a workhorse for a group of grey market mercenaries trying to eke out a living in the stars)

Arsenal Gear from MGS2. There's something about that completely impractical and overblown sort of scifi maximalism prompting people to make impractically huge floating fortresses that I simply adore.

In what is I guess the complete opposite of the last example, The Lookfar from Earthsea. One boat that can comfortably fit maybe two people and the endless potential of the seas stretching in every direction.

That one flying ship from pokemon the movie 2000 no thematic notes here I just thought it was sick as fuck as a kid

You're probably actually asking about my favorite fictional relationships (canon or theoretical), I don't do fandom type shipping stuff that much but here's what I got for you. Maybe not top five, no particular order, but I think about these a lot.

Madohomu. You might have seen this coming. Girl with something wrong with her x girl with something wrong with her. Aloof facade hiding mountains of pain x emotions worn on the sleeve in the face of incomprehensible horror. Incompatible self sacrifice complexes. No possible happy ending.

Narusasu. You probably also saw this one coming. It's a perfect tragedy. Naruto really was the only person who understood Sasuke's pain, and he used that influence to win him back to subservience to liberalism and away from in any meaningful way changing the system that had forced them both to endure isolation and nightmares as children. Then they fucked off to the least happy heterosexual marriages in the world. Sublime.

Franklin and Charlie from Merrily We Roll Along. You know that old saying about how some men ruin the lives of every woman they love because their soulmate is a man? Franklin Shepard is the gay Sondheim character, NOT Bobby (who I will go to my grave saying is and has always been intended as a straight man). He got caught in a raid on a Greenwich village and had to get counseling in the 60s ffs like that's like textual!!! When his first wife is brought up he's a little bitter in the easy ough bitch ex wife taking all my money way but apparently bringing Charlie up after their alienation is a surefire way to get him in a horrible mood. The story is to me all but textually about a man driving himself further and further into the closet so he can succeed in Hollywood.

aw man you guys can't make fun of me for this one you have to promise but I still find monica/chandler cute. Like yeah largely nowadays I consider friends to be an extremely dated show that is all but unwatchable because of how much it relies on a style of tv storytelling that has all but died out and how it stretched the few decent things it had over way too many seasons and also its shitty politics. But I still like the monica/chandler relationship. It's cute and they're sweet.

I don't know if I'd say this is an all timer for me but lately I've been really sort of savoring the dynamic between Ssrin and Anna from Exordia. There's so much sensuality between them whenever they're on the page together. Really saves that book from the endless mire of drama between those two gay ass cops.

[autobot-ratchet]

Drift: Empire of Stone

Empire of Stone 1

okay now jump to the present. Honestly, love that Drift is out here not knowing what the fuck to do with himself but at least trying his best to do good in the meantime. Like, he could've gone back to Cybertron but god knows he feels like he's ruined all his chances with all sides of the Cybertronian populace, so drifting it is

love that Drift is simply better than Grit lmAO he's come a long way from getting tossed around by Wing

“be shoosh,” he says. Shut up nerd lmAO

RATCHEEEEETTTT HIIIII, HI RATCHET ❤️❤️❤️ KICKS MY GAY LITTLE FEET

“When's the last time you went in for repairs?” “The shuttle's fine.” “I wasn't talking about the shuttle.” ehehehehehe

“I like being out here, doing this,” he lied, trying too hard to look cool in front of his crush

sorry I went and said that as a joke and then I remembered that they get canon married so that's like. Actually not a joke lmfAO Ratchet actually is his crush and I still even now am fucking floored by that

gfdsjka love Grit's comrades being like “ooh, ooh, I'll rat!” “I'll rat as well, please”

“There's no point in living if you have to sacrifice everything you are to do it.” hell yeah

Empire of Stone 2

honestly I kinda like that we're facing the consequences of Drift's past actions as Deadlock in a way other than “someone wants to kill him for either defecting or for something he did as Deadlock”

also love that Drift folds immediately once Gigatron starts even mildly hurting Ratchet, gayass

“Decepticons don't slaughter their own kind for no good reason at all.” they like. Extremely do lmfAO there's an entire Justice Division that is known by literally all Cybertronians for doing exactly that but go off

gfjhdjks I will admit the humor in this miniseries is really hit or miss, but the jokes that hit are still so good, love Ratchet's attempt to escape jail by having Drift play dead and how it does not even slightly work

“You've got your own issues, I get it, don't put 'em on me.” Yeah, I bet Drift does see a lot of Deadlock in Grit, especially with how much faith he has in the Decepticon cause

Love Ratchet not taking one more second of Drift's self-sacrificing heroics. “Did kicking you out of the Autobots really have this much of an impact on you?” is a fucking excellent question to ask him. I don't think it was any kind of special attachment to the Autobot cause that made his exile hurt this much, but more just him being rejected by a community he was almost starting to finally belong in. Like if the Circle of Light had kicked him out, it would've made him just as much of a mess

Empire of Stone 3

I was gonna make a joke about Hellbat embarrassing Drift in front of Ratchet by bringing up something awful he did as Deadlock but it actually is really sweet how that doesn't deter Ratchet from bringing him back to the Lost Light at all. He knows damn well what Drift has done and he's already come to his own conclusion, thank you very much

love this fuckin panel so much :')

I did not have a lot to say about this issue but honestly that's because I don't have a lot to say about the whole conflict what with Hellbat using the stone army to kill everything ever because I do not care lmAO I'm here for Drift and Ratchet and maybe a little Grit, he's pretty good

Empire of Stone 4

maneuver seven is just tossing a bitch

hell yeah, Drift, you assert that self worth

I'll be honest, I have not given a single shit about Hellbat or Gigatron this whole time, but there is something about their inability to move on from the war, their choice to kill and die in battle for the sake of it, not even for any cause, just killing and dying because it's all they can do. Drift was close to falling into that same trap, flying around and defeating rogue Decepticons because fighting is all he can do, but Ratchet's presence and Wing's memory helped him finally move on and let himself start to be something else

yeah this is kinda what I mean when I say the humor is really hit or miss lmAO this was a really good moment for Drift, finally realizing his worth as a person and I really wish it wasn't met with “that's pretty stupid.” Like I get that Ratchet was just jabbing, but like. You couldn't have had him say “it's about damn time” or something??? he's been waiting for Drift to have this realization for four million years, come on lmAO

good for Grit for moving on, too. Shame he never shows up again, at least not that I remember lmfAO I know for sure he's not in MTMTE or Lost Light, maybe he showed back up in another series and I just don't remember

[vole-mon-amour]

Rogue: Ok, do it's twenty-fifteen. If you could do it all again, what would you change? Anything at all?

Johnny: Yeah—I'd do Kerry.

Rogue: Huh?

Johnny: I mean, guy deserved it. Always tryin' so damn hard.

Rogue: Fucking hell, Johnny. I was being serious.

So was I? What exactly made you think that Johnny was kidding? Sure, maybe it was Johnny's kind of playful but not really "I mean, the guy deserves it", but I think it's a part of a bigger problem that doesn't mean Johnny wasn't being serious.

Honestly, it's such a huge topic how Johnny saw sex as something too casual. How he'd share his body with basically anyone—both as a treat and punishment. Just like that shard said, "The rumors were Johnny slept with [half of his band? don't remember], though his heart wasn't always in it." I said this before and I'm saying this again: Johnny deserved better. The kind of depression he had didn't happen overnight.

Sure, he himself admits that he fucked over people that cared about him, including Rogue and Kerry. And yet, I still think it was a part of his depression. That bitch will turn you into a completely different person than what you actually are. Not to say Johnny didn't understand his actions at all or that he wasn't a bastard—he did and he was, but he STILL deserved better.

It always gets to me tbh. That Johnny saw how hard Kerry tried, how big of a crush he had on Johnny—was in love, honestly, because further in the game it's evident that Kerry still loves and cares about Johnny, that even 50 years later it's still so hard to let go. And despite and BECAUSE of his love for Johnny he still fought Johnny—he saw where all of that was going, all the destruction, how it ruins both Johnny and the band (and because of that, it was ruining Kerry, too.)

What could (*sigh* and should) have been if it was all different. In different universe they were never that depressed, that bad to each other, and it all worked out for them. And Johnny was genuinely in love with Kerry, too. It was all mutual and everlasting.

(Just thought of how awful the grief would be for Kerry if Johnny died at Arasaka and he would have to grieve not only his heartbreak because of what Johnny did and what he felt for Johnny, and how Johnny left, "See you in the next life" and all of that, but because they were dating for a long time and Kerry would've lost his partner. The loyalty, the love. The "I would kill for you, I would destroy the entire world for you, I would die for you. You are the most important person to me."

Okay, I am going absolutely feral right now. It drives me insane. I still can't believe sometimes that the "I'd do Kerry" answer is canon and how much layers it adds to Johnny's character, but at the same time it was and feels so necessary. A silly date with Rogue with Johnny trying to bang her, huh? :') What a camouflage to open up about Kerry.)

Oh, and the fact that after Rogue rejects Johnny, Johnny IMMEDIATELY asks V to take him to Kerry. And that The Lovers tarot is hidden in the drive-in location, which can both be applied to Kerry and Rogue.

"The challenge of striking a balance between extremes."

Like... There's no way I'm gonna unship Johnny and Kerry.

[sibillascribbles08]

Pray tell what is the ninjago s10 you wrote in your head 👀

Waaah okay this is a touch of an essay and is kind of full of OCs sorry ???

Anyway it was lame AF to me that the show built up so much hype around the oni and then they were the lamest villains ever like okay they have freaky paralyzing smoke and what else?? They got disintegrated by a tornado of creation this is so lame what.

SO a few things I would go about tweaking, and this is keeping everything up to s9 canon btw not changing things around in there (I have other versions where I tweak that stuff lmao)

So first, Leader of the oni is actually scary as fuck, Queen of the Oni to be exact, yeah that's right the FSM had two moms who are now divorced. I have art of this lady on the blog (Queenie is her usual title) and while she's often seen as just six ft tall an elegant she can get massive sized so thirty feet <3 She's powerful, because she has every kind of magic oni can learn at her disposal and this includes mind control, illusions, transformation, gravity, all that jazz (My essay on how the elemental powers are split between oni and dragon origins is something for another time). Anyway she can p much just paralyze people with her mind if she needs to when she walks into a room.

The invasion just starts with her, because while most of the oni have been hiding away in the departed realm like the show states, she's actually been hanging around in Ninjago for ages. In fact, surprise, she was disguised as the Empress the whole time. Let Harumi find all those books about the oni masks so she'd open a portal and summon Garmadon.

Cept that wasn't Garmadon, it's another oni in disguise, and this is why he's so fucking OOC, except he ditched his post and is now kinda hiding from her.

Hang on I'm getting on a tangent here, ANYWAY she reveals herself to specifically talk to Lloyd and try to get him on her side, because family and all that, and while Lloyd obviously hesitates the Queen is pretty convincing and may also be threatening his friends lives so he surrenders and Queenie activates his oni blood which like, doesn't make him evil but does make him a little more inclined to get into trouble lmao.

And NOW the army comes through, poison oni are the ones setting off the smoke causing paralysis. The ninja are scrambling for a plan and while doing this start recruiting the other elemental masters to help. Detail details, two other things happen. Wu travels back to the first realm to find Firstborne, believing she's the only thing that could stop Queenie. Meanwhile the oni disguised as Garmadon (named Efri) gets found out and forced to travel through the departed realm to find the FSM for help (he finds the real Garmadon along the way and some of the past EMs (including Cole's mom, Jay's birth mom, OG Ice Master, Dr. Julien, and even Morro) (Everyone is here YAY)

More details details, the elemental masters are trying to keep the oni contained, trying to get Lloyd to stop helping Queenie (Lloyd: Guys don't you get it, we wouldn't even have to fight if you'd just LISTEN to us) And big climax everyone gets back from their respective adventures and crashes in the middle (FSM doesn't come back btw he's a bitch who says no my problem and Garmadon tells him to go fuck himself)

Big epic fight montage which eventually cuts back to a 30ft Queenie fighting Firstborne but while they are like, fighting, they are also arguing like a divorced couple and Lloyd is standing there like lmao wait ???? you two seriously just need marriage counseling ARE YOU SERIOUS?

Basically by listening Lloyd figures out that A) Queenie and Firstborne got divorced because of a rift the FSM sort of caused (not entirely his fault but he was the spearhead). B) The war left a lot of scarring on both sides. C) The First Realm looks like SHIT because with the oni gone, so was the balance, causing the land to turn to ruin despite dragons being considered creators they had no idea how to maintain the environment.

Lloyd gets the help of the other ninja, turn into this giant fusion spirit thing just to stop Queenie and Firstborne from fighting and tell them to GET THEIR SHIT TOGETHER YOU TWO ARE HOW GODDAMN OLD TALK SHIT OUT LIKE ADULTS.

So they do. Not everything is fixed but it's a start. Oni are allowed back in the first realm to start fresh (a few stay in ninjago). Lloyd has a lot of new powers to learn how to deal with. A lot of ninja get closure talking to ghosts (yay?)

UUUH The end, I know it's missing some details but summaries and all that.

[lemonmatronics]

Oh god where do I start

hmmm,,,Their team ups with other villains? Sure why not

lets go in the order they happen

Coldheart’s role in the au starts off fairly small. An old man that’s lost the motivation to keep fighting the bears and has been left all alone. Isolating himself in the cold winter depths of The Silver Lining to make sure nobody else bothers him again. However, that’s not what happens, of course.

His name became legend amongst evil doers, especially inventors. An assumed dead inspiration to many, who’s work is heavily studied. Robbie is no exception, and knows fully well of his previous life. However a run in with the bears in the winter lands leads to her finding out he’s still just as alive as he was years ago.

She waists no time, the first chance she gets to sneak out and find him again is the chance she takes. Surely, if anyone can help her with her current problem, it’s another genius inventor. One that couldn’t get her banished for speaking up on it even.

She ventures off into the snow and find him, and despite the cold welcome, ends up getting into his home and confides in him. The poor girl, completely unsure of how to deal with her issues. And who could blame her? I mean…her boss’ plans all keep failing!!

She laments about how she doesn’t know how they’re gonna take over the Silver Lining when her boss is starting to ignore her ideas. She has so many plans herself he just refuses to listen to now! But of course, Coldheart doesn’t exactly have sound advice. Though he can’t help but think of…oh forget him!

He tells her to just stick by him and support him. He is her boss after all. It’s not good to abandon someone so important to you.

She’s not exactly happy with this advice, but she doesn’t pry for more.

But despite the rough introduction, the two keep talking. Robbie talking about her inventions and schemes to take down the bears while Coldheart recites the past. Wow, he really did all of that alone! (lying bitch)

The dynamic starts off grand, Robbie managing to sneak off about once a month to help work on a big invention to help the Bad Crowd take down the bears. Yes! It’s perfect, a safe failplan if they just can’t do it! Surely no character arc happens with her that causes her to slowly distance herself away from this plan!

Anyways a character arc happens that causes her to slowly distance herself away from this plan.

After awhile Bluster simply gets worse as Robbie starts getting closer to the bears, going as far as to help them ruin plans. Of course, this puts an issue in hers.

Oh what’s a girl to do, she can’t bring herself to go work on the machine again. She doesn’t know where her loyalty lyes anymore. She can go explain it next month, she’ll have things figured out then…

maybe..maybe next month then! She can’t bring herself to end it face to face yet but next month for sure!

oh..she missed the date..should she go late? No..no next month

She can go…

next month.

…maybe she just shouldn’t go, actually…

Why did abandoning him feel so awful? It was pure business!…Oh god, imagine doing that to an actual friend…She could never do that.

Never.

~~~~

Fairly early on, just a little bit before that last arc started actually, Bluster actually finds himself another little friend- oh what the fuck is that!?… “King Beastly?”…yeah no, Bluster just calls him King.

KB’s species is actually almost all found in Care a Lot itself! But KB isn’t like the other crazy fur balls no. Banished to The Silver Lining by his own species! How dreadful! Even more dreadful when some purple freaks find you and start cooing at you. Even more so when they put you in their car and take you home!! Then they have the nerve to bathe you! And make you wear this stupid collar! And put a roof over your head!..and feed you..and give you tons of attention..okay OKAY MAYBE it’s not so bad. But he’ll never admit that he’s accepted being Bluster’s new freakish cat.

~~~~

No Heart is of course canon in the au, that’s been established just like the others. However, despite his main focus being earth, he ends up forming a loose alliance with Bluster and Rob. How does that happen? Well who do you think brought him back silly!! In fact, they brought all three of them back!

Finding No Heart’s old castle, they accidentally shatter the mirror that trapped the three inside. Now freed after many years of being stuck in the cage that saved their lives as the castle fell to the ground.

Their relationship with No Heart starts off okay enough, opting to make a deal with him.

If he needed their help, they’d give it. And if they needed his, he’d do the same. What kind of crazy plans pan out because of this deal!?

Babysitting duty. They get stuck on babysitting duty.

More specifically Rob, like hell Bluster’s gonna stop his plans for some twerps. Occasionally Malcom may help her, but if she’s honest…nobody helping is better than him.

Having to watch Shreeky and Beastly a fair bit, she gets decently close with the two, and starts accepting the more material side of herself. (Something she denies at first when she first connected with Dibble)

Though something with No Heart is bubbling under the surface that none of the rest catch onto. But that whole plan, happens much much later on. He’s smart of course.

He knows how long to wait.

~~~~

EVIL SPIRIT IS A BITCH AND YA’LL CAN HEAR ABOUT THAT LATER ya’ll can wait for that mess

HOOOOOOOO, it’s fuckin crazy. But heeey you saw that art, you know the basics 💜💚

Edit: OH ALSO uh, none of these descriptions show you the end of these dynamics. There is more to each of these, it’s simply the basic beginnings

I wanna talk about my au wtf do I talk about with my au uhh

[djcarnationsblog]

Metal Family: Dee Headcanons

HC 1: Okay, I have to say this but, Dee’s got squishy cheeks. THE squishiest, and he hates it cause Glam likes to squish his cheeks when he’s being too edgy and it totally ruins the vibe and shit, so he’ll just get all huffy and walk away, cheeks puffed and everything and Glam finds that fucking hilarious.

HC 2: Yeah sure, it’s canonical that this boy sucks at everything love related, but then I’m like “He’s probably weak as fuck when someone kisses him.” and now we have this. He WILL buffer if his love interest gives him even the smallest kiss on like, his brow or something. He’ll just sit there, and process it for a whole minute cause what the fuck was that??? And then he’ll blush immensely and then completely leave the room. Mans just can’t take a tiny kiss to save his life-

HC 3: He craves touch. That’s it, that’s hc-nah just kidding XD. He does crave touch, but it’s not like he’s touch-starved or anything. It’s more like, he simply enjoys the feeling of someone giving him friendly touch, like a pat on the back, or a fist bump, any kind of physical contact he secretly enjoys, cause it just feels really nice to him.

HC 4: I wanna say when he’s in his last year of highschool, he’ll get a tattoo. Not anything too big and it’s pretty easy to hide, but it’s a nice hibiscus flower, pretty colors and all. I say it’s probably on his hip, since it’s not often he wears anything too revealing.

HC 5: This leads into my next hc, Dee likes flower language. He finds it clever and enjoyable that one can use such pretty flowers to create a nice message, dark message, a threat, or anything really. Flowers just mask the darker things, in his opinion. And he loves being able to tell a person a subtle ‘fuck you’ in flower, so he studied that shit quite a lot-

HC 6: Okay, hear me out here but...Dee’s flexible. VERY. Flexible. He just looks like that kinda guy who could drop into a split without absolutely torturing himself and all the boys are terrified of him for that. He can split, backbend, fold in on himself, and pretty much a whole variety of other things.

HC 7: Because of his flexibility, he actually finds a lot of weird positions comfortable. Breakin’ his body in half so his upper body is on the bed and lower body on the wall? Peak comfortability. Twisting himself really awkwardly and just sitting there? Fuckin’ nice-

HC 8: Okay, okay, one more, but bare with me here because I’m treading on canon territory as well as some fuckin’ bulls I made a while ago-

Dee, in the og au, I want to say is just a mess of bisexual. He’s all cool and collected on the outside, but Lord knows what goes on in his head when he sees a pretty girl or a handsome boy, all the red alerts go off in his head. He may not have a good grasp of love, but he’s had many, MANY internal bi panics thank you very much uwu (We see you and Lif, ya little son of a bitch-)

Okay, so, kinda nervous bout this one cause it involves an au where I made ocs for it, so if ya don’t wanna read this part, just keep scrollin’ cause this is the last of it XD.

Dee, in the au I created, is Bisexual and Polyamorous. He’s with two peeps, Lif and a foreign oc I made, his name’s Eden UnU. Literally, he’s with a hot girl and hot boy, he has even admitted to Heavy that he could never answer the question of ‘which one is hotter’ if someone were to ask him. A one time thing. Heavy never let him live it down-

(I also wanted to mention Eden cause my mind’s been screaming at me to ramble about him, but I wanna know if y’all would wanna see that too XD

is it alright with y’all for me to info dump bout my boy and his relationship with Lif and Dee??)

[mayday505]

Skk canon angst that wont leave my head

no right i keep on seeing ppl be like oh yeah dazai cares about chuuya chuuya doesnt actually hate dazai blah blah blah blah talking abt dazai leaving the mafia NO. NO SHUT UP FOR A MINUTE. CHUUYA HATES DAZAI HE ABSOLUTELY FUCKING DESPISES THE MAN. This isn't canon but its really interesting to think about, because I think he actually really resents dazai in some way or another, like. Dazai manipulated the sheep so theyd betray chuuya. There was no saying if they wouldve had he not done that. Chuuya was happy before Dazai came along. and then all of that was ruined, he was betrayed and forced into the mafia. and ofc then he's partners with dazai and theyre semi friends so its not that bad of an outcome for chuuya, he benefitted a lot from the situation. BUT THEN DAZAI LEAVES???? and he gets to go and become this better person and leave the mafia behind, whilst chuuya is stuck there with NOTHING and NOWHERE TO GO. Like just shut up for a second and imagine the resentment that comes with that. Dazai treated Chuuya like DOGSHIT and never ONCE apologised or faced consequence for how he treated him. Dazai was a piece of shit human being all round, and somehow its HIM that gets to leave and pursue this life as a better person??? When he's done nothing to earn it but lose one friend??? That would enrage chuuya so much because he was forced into this mafia life, he didnt have a choice. And the one that took that choice from him was Dazai, who is now running round parading himself as this good guy whilst Chuuya is still in the mafia, reaping the consequences of DAZAIS ACTIONS. And on TOP OF THAT, dazai never apologises or faces what he did to chuuya or even acknowledges it, even in passing. He never has to own up to it and can just start this new life without repairing their relationship even in the slightest. Even after four years, and all that time living as some "better person" and Dazai still refuses to prove he's changed instead of banking on the fact that Chuuya wont care. I think he'd harbour a lot of resentment over it, that Dazai is the one to get the life that he probably wanted as well, back when he was a member of the sheep. Because he has to watch the person who essentially ruined his life get everything he ever wanted, and that would hurt like a bitch. Especially that Dazai never took and never would have to take responsibility either, and that he never will. I just think the angst is so strong with it. I'd like to see them reuniting after 4 years when Dazai got captured, but its full on emotions, Dazai thinking he can taunt him like normal but chuuya just isnt having it because no youre not doing this again. and just RIP into him about how he never cared and is a selfish bastard, because he hasnt changed and just SCREAM about how angry he is and how it isnt fair that Dazai is the one that got the good ending and not Chuuya. He definitely resents Dazai for everything that happened, especially how he never even got an apology, like its proof that he never changed, even though he claimed to.

AAAA just the potential with it istfg. Like theres definitely more animosity between the two in canon than the fandom makes out there is (probably not to this degree but its cool to think about)

[reddieandwaiting87]

Top 5 times Misha ruined supernatural

Wow that's a great one @chiazu thank you!!

I mean I could just say by being himself and ugly but you said top 5 so here goes.

I will try and make this all Misha and not Asstiel moments.

Top 5 times Misha ruined Supernatural.

1.) Sucking up to Singer. Alot of things I will mention here is due to the fact Misha sucked up to Singer and became his little pet. Eye bags is smart and knows whose ass to kiss.

2.) Staying WELL over his time. Asstiel never should have came out of that lake in S7. But again friends with Singer, so when Sera fucked up the budget and Singer got more control of course eye bags comes back. And Misha says yes because again he knows he will NEVER get a gig like SPN again.

3.) Forcing his way into photoshoots. Again cause he was friends with Singer (and took a pay cut cause the man is just an attention whore and cares more about being seen then money.) He gets to be the 3rd wheel and stick out like an ugly sore thumb off the show now as well as on it. Also then his fans think he is a lead. Lol no.

4.) Taking away from Mark.S finally SPN scene/Crowley dying. I think this was more Singer/Dabb giving Mark.S a big fuck you. Just like taking him out of the bloopers in S12. For daring to point somethings out to them. But I'm sure Misha really had to be forced into getting attention too. Having Asstiel die in a lame way isn't a bad thing. I mean it's what his character deserves but to do it right after Crowley and when we all knew Asstiel would be back yeah. Fuck Singer and Misha for that one. They would rather piss off one of the few good actors on the show and keep the useless dead weight cause one sucks up to them while other who can act btw dares to say something.

5.) Now the show is over instead of being thankful and showing appreciation to the show that put up with his talentless ass. Eye bags forever the classy good looking man he is. Wants attention and pandering to shippers only does so much. So now he wants everyone to believe he was picked on and he had a smaller trailer then J2.

Well duh you fucking cunt, your an over the hill bad actor, side character. While they are the stars of the fucking show. You wouldn't have a job without them. Remember you didn't have a job for over a year without them? Singer go only do so much for you.

And that he didn't enjoy working on the show. While not outright saying J2 where Jerks to him (cause he still needs to let on to Cockley cunts he and Jensen are BFFs in RL.) But hinting enough to get sympathy and make J2/SPN look bad.

He can't even lie convincingly because if the show was that bad and the environment so awful. Why come back after S7? Why take a pay cut to stay on? Why cry like a bitch when you found out J2 wanted to move on?

I know you said 5 things which I did but you can't mention Misha ruining Supernatural and not mention the worst ship ever.

Bonus mention!!!!

Another way Misha ruined the show and the fandom was Destiel.

While yes Misha didn't come up with it and there is nothing wrong with ships and shipping. Fuck every show/Movie we watch or book we read we all ship something. Some don't even make sense or aren't canon cause thats the beauty of shipping.

Unless you are a loser that tries to make fake ships canon and then cry queer bait and how everyone is homophobic for not shipping you ship. Get a life no one likes you. Just FYI 🤪

But Misha ever the loser and attention whore. Has made the Destiel ship and Destiehellers one of the most entitled loud bunch of unlikeable cry babies ever to exist in a fandom and thats saying alot.

So thats why it gets a special message. XD

In short Misha is gross inside and out and seeing less of him is amazing.

Thank you for the ask anon. That was fun.

If anymore has anymore send them my way.

[moonsoupstar-ao3]

Chapter 2 (ALSO SPOILERS FROM VERY LATE IN THE MANGA IN THIS PART)

I think something I usually don't acknowledge (and like, as an unconscious act) is that Yukio has as many answers as Rin around their births and all the demon stuff

Yeah, he was an exorcist and could fight along side Shiro (one thing Rin in the manga openly told him he was very jealous about) but he never got proper answers for his questions

I think that's also one of my favorite things about aoex and the way they portray the brothers as two sides of the same coin, both are struggling and have their own problems but they also share lots of the same troubles and stuff

They hurt each other, but never to a psychopath degree that other animes usually show between siblings or friends that "truly love (platonically) each other", and they care and they love an they envy so, so much

One got the chance to understand to some point about their situation from the start, the other got time to grown up like a "normal" person (or at least as much as the inherent demon's abilities allowed him)

That's probably another point that made me so frustrated with Yukio at the end of the Past Arc, he could have answers, Rin was so willing to share them with him because he probably knew or had guessed that Yukio wanted them as much as him, but he refused, he didn't want to know anymore

And it took me just one more chapter to understood "why?", he wanted to die, he was ready to sacrifice himself, and he probably thought "what is the point of knowing then?"

I guess I just wish he agrees to see the past with Rin once everything settle down and the timelines come back to normal, it's gonna hurt him, it's probably going to ruin so much of him that isn't fully broken yet, but I believe is for the best

ANYWAY, BACK TO THE ANIME JSVDBDN

I'm still not used to this Mephisto

Ok, no, I'm sorry, I know what I said literally one line above but I can't just shut up about Rin and Yukio, I love them both too much

IT'S SO PAINFULLY OBVIOUS HOW MUCH YUKIO CARED FOR RIN AND HOW MUCH HE WAS WORRIED ABOUT HIM BEING AN EXORCIST

like, c'mon, he knew they were Satan's sons and that there was so many weapons pointing at them

And I'm fully convinced half or more of his worries about Rin not being able to control his flames was for Shiro's death and that their father's death would go in vain, but the rest was totally "fuck no, you WILL NOT put my brother in this mess!!!!"

This is canon in my mind, no one can convince me otherwise, Kato told me herself

I love that no one trust Mephisto lmao

Yeah, don't give that bitch a chance, he doesn't deserves it (I love him)

YUKIO AND SHIEMI SCENE WAS SO CUTE

I just noticed Yukio's eyes are also like Rin's

Sorry I won't shut up about them, that's what happens to me when you put my babies on screen for more than half a second

RIN FACES ARE THE BEST AS ALWAYS

Kamiki is so lesb coded I swear "I JUST WANNA BE FRIENDS WITH YOU (Paku)" ok girl

My headcanon is that she's bi but heavily girl inclined, but fr canon anime/manga is just sooo queer coded anyway

Yukio is pulling so much "gremlin youngest sibling" energy is amazing, good for him

I love how the animators hid the guys crossdressing jsvdjdjjd

SAY IT SHIEMI SAY IT

GIRLS SUPPORTING GIRLS IS WHAT WE ALL DESERVE

Rin: "I'm really pretty, right?" Yes, baby, you're

Yukio, Tanaka and Shima looked almost good actually

I love that it showed how Lewin was actually concerned and then all goofy again

AND THIS TIME I ACTUALLY LIKED MEPHISTO'S VOICE WHEN HE SPOKE GERMAN

Lucifer's eyes shining in the dark were actually quite unnerving

THE ENDING SOUNDS SO CUTE I LOVE IT

and the little drawings :((((( I'm in love guys

That's Mephisto's phone??????????

I started watching aoex season 3

So I decided to share my thoughts as I see the chapters (NOT SPOILER FREE)

Chapter 1:

not a full fan of the new art style but not a hater either

can't forgive them for taking away my troll clown though

also the voice, dunno, maybe I'm remembering the voice wrong in past seasons but yeah, not for me (especially when he says "eins, zwei, drei" I just feel like is the wrong tone)

also, I love the pace of the chapter but am really bitter that they cut the bestism (Angel & Lightning) first show time together so short

THE GEHENNA SCENE WAS SOOOOOO, loved the light hint to trigger response from Rin

uhhhhh what else....

THE SHAPESHIFTER BATTLE

so, so good, when Rin, Izumo, and Shima attacked and the camera was moving I didn't know where to look at

I'MMA FIGHT WITH MY BARE HANDS ANYONE WHO DARES SAYS MY BOY RIN ISN'T SMART AFTER THIS SEASON

alright then, time for chapter 2 :D

[starlitheaven]

— 𝐦𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐯𝐮𝐥𝐧𝐞𝐫𝐚𝐛𝐢𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐲

pairing. gojo satoru x f!reader

summary. You surprise Satoru (and yourself) when you start texting him at 2am. He wakes up to your weak moment and it's not what he expects. He also doesn't expect to be getting himself off at 11am but, oh well.

tags. mutual masturbation, smut , headcanons hidden in there, phone sex?, dirty talk kinda, established (casual) relationship, Satoru-centric, feelings, comfort

notes. no idea what this even is um. i’ve never vocalized sounds so much but kinda had no choice here. this was supposed to just be you turning gojo on, but it got sweet at the end. we’re blaming thank u next/positions for this. (Btw Gojo has canonically seen Digimon, that’s why his cat is named Gatomon hdjdks)

word count. 2.7k+

Satoru doesn’t have many weaknesses (or any, really), but jet lag is a bitch whether you’re the strongest or not. Stumbling dead tired into his penthouse at around 11pm, he had enough energy to remove his clothes minus his boxer briefs, wash his face, and brush his teeth before almost literally falling into bed. He was asleep within the minute.

On a normal day, he wakes up at 9am, either going for a run or playing some Mortal Kombat before showering and getting ready. Last night he came back late, but a week earlier than expected from a particularly long mission out of the country with Okkotsu. Even before that mission, he was working almost nonstop and teaching the kids between that. Today, he wakes up a few hours past his normal time.

Opening one eye, Satoru groans at the bright sunlight coming into the window by his bed. He wishes he had enough energy last night to lower his blackout blinds. If he had to guess, it’s probably around 11am.

Finding his phone at the very edge of his nightstand, so close to falling on the ground, Satoru grabs it and checks the time. 11:19am reads back at him. Hell yeah, he was right. Of course he was~!

He has a few notifications from last night, most boring as fuck considering who they’re from: Yaga, Ijichi, Old Fucker #4, Old Fucker #2, but a few stand out to him.

Megumi-chan: you forgot to wish Kugisaki a happy birthday and she seemed pretty upset. Itadori and I took her to Balenciaga then dinner at Beige. I used your card so that’s what those charges are, thanks. 

Almost 40,000 yen for dinner and who knows what at Balenciaga…okay next message. 

Nanami Kento (o˘◡˘o): Call me when you’re back. Your cat is impossibly energetic. I strongly believe this is a dog in a cats suit. Onigiri is fed up. I’m also billing you for my ruined curtains. 

Maybe he should just go back to sleep but…oh. It’s you. 

You two had been going on dates and hooking up for a few months now. Did his month gone count? Anyway, you were aware that things weren’t completely serious or he wasn’t committed. You also weren’t, but he knew that you had mostly gone on a few first dates and none had stuck beyond that.  

What he loved about you is that you were a good judge of character. You knew what you deserved and who was worth your time. He loved being the exception to that! 

When Satoru is in a different part of the country, he occasionally finds someone to spend his downtime with if he’s really bored. Over time though, he’s found himself leaving those casual dates feeling…off. He’ll wish he had called you instead. 

He’s begun to wonder if you feel the same way on your own dates that aren’t with him. The thought has come to him more often lately.

During his month gone, you two had spoken maybe twice. Briefly. In the quiet of his bedroom, alone with nothing but cool bedsheets and filtering sunlight, he can admit he misses you. 

                              honeybaby (─‿‿─)♡

1:55am :  satoruuuuu

1:55am :  fuck I just ok

1:57am :  my date ended early he was just so boring. he wasn’t funny and was rude to the waiter!! idk I miss you

2:00am :  I came home and uhhh ahhhhh I put on your shirt. the black one you forgot here and ahhahfhajas

2:03am : ok so I didn’t wash it on purpose, it’s been in my closet and omg it still smells like you!!! what cologne even is this?? how expensive is this, I just know it is. Satoruuuuu

2:04am :  satoruu, you’ve been gone for so long I didn’t wanna say it because you have such an ego it doesn’t need to be any bigger, but I miss you.

2:05am :  you goddamn pretty boy ughhh, why are you so hot why do I miss your laugh why do I

Like always, you were definitely right. Seeing someone as stubborn as you being so vulnerable like this was inflating his ego. Snickering, Satoru cooed at how sweet you were to miss him so. He couldn’t wait to see you. To make fun of you and just tease you over this. He can already imagine the embarrassment in your eyes and irritated expression, how hilarious. 

Even if you didn’t mean to call him pretty boy endearingly, he actually loved that. The last person who’d call him that…

An audio message? This one was sent about 10 minutes after your last text. Satoru’s laughs slowly died down so he can hear what you’re going to say.

“Oh—oh fuck me, mmm—“ Satoru’s eyes widened in surprise. He was rarely caught off guard but this. This wasn’t what he—oh fuck, you were moaning and they were so soft and breathy. Along with those sounds you were making, he could hear a crude and sweet squelching sound.

Still in shock, there was no denying what you were doing. His mind was racing. He felt like the world just tilted, as if the jet lag just landed a finishing move on him. The universe kicking him in the balls. Something like that.

Was this real? Is he dreaming? This has to be a dream this is too—

“Mmm, I’m so fucking—oh,” you gasped breathlessly, and moaning out some obscenities. 

There was no going back to sleep after this. The bright sunlight and shade making a pattern over his body and bed didn’t even compute in Satoru’s mind anymore. The audio message was almost echoing in his large bedroom. You were whimpering and sighing out little ohh’s and ahh’s. Oh shit oh shit you sounded so fucking aroused oh fuckkkk

“Oh my god, mm baby—“ a high whimper and mhm mhm. You were a mixture of breathy moans, sighs, and gasps. Another gasp. A sigh. Satoru spread his thighs as he felt himself harden. His body needed to shut up, he’s trying to listen here.

“Ohhh fuck, Sa—“ you cut off to let out a louder moan. If you didn’t sound so erotic he would’ve been more upset that what was probably his name was cut off. 

He had expected your voice message to have been a biting threat to forget every text you had just sent. A threat to him to forget your vulnerability, but he had no idea you missed him that much. You may be the only person who missed him, actually. 

Well, Yuuji probably missed him too. He’s a really good kid and he—nope! Sorry to his precious student, but he’s a mood killer right now. Shaking his head to forget that, the sounds of your fingers rubbing on your dripping cunt brought him back into the mood. 

You sound so wet, shit. He can almost imagine what you’d look like. Laying on your bed (smaller and less comfortable than his), probably tangled in those new white silk sheets he bought you. Your purple ambient lighting painting your bedroom in seduction. Or maybe you lit up all those candles you love. Considering your texts, you were most likely wearing his shirt still. 

Maybe you were only in his shirt…you must look so pretty. Naked and bare in only his shirt. Your nice legs spread and soft skin flushed and warm. 

Oh damn, you were probably touching yourself in his shirt and surrounded in his scent. Which cologne was it? The Dior one? Should he wear it forever now??

“I just—mhmm,” you were so cute, still trying to talk while clearly so far gone. “Want you to—fuck, tease me n’—“ you gasped and whimpered. “n’ be mean to me, oh god be mean to me—hah—fuck that’s…pretendyoudidnthearthat!” 

You sounded like you were muffled. Like you were biting your lip in humiliation or embarrassment. He could imagine your face heating up and cheeks reddening in shame.

That’s. That alone is enough to get him off. He’s had a feeling you were into his mean streak, but wasn’t completely sure. This confirmation...much to think about. Then again, every thought he’s having is just flying out the window as he hears you getting yourself off. 

 “Fuck me harder—“ another gasp. Shit you must be close, you sound so slutty and needy. He will never financially recover from this. The world is done. “Fuck I wanna come—Satoru please—can I come please baby—mmm!“ 

What were you thinking about? What were you imagining? Because that’s where he wants to be, sheesh. 

“Satoru, Satoru, fuck—Satoru oh, mmm—ah,” Holy shit. You were unbelievable. He couldn’t even make fun of you, not when this was the hottest thing he’s ever heard. It sounded like saying his name was only taking you higher. You probably didn’t expect to get so aroused by sounding so desperate.

As someone who’s also stubborn like you, he knows how thrilling and good it can feel when you give up control. This usually manifests when the right person comes along. He’s glad he can be that for you, he’ll do so much with this for you (while also teasing and bullying you about it).

He couldn’t take it, he was getting so restless. “Fuck sweetheart,” Satoru groaned, palming himself to get some quick relief. “Wanna hear you come, sweet thing.” He just had to wait a bit more until you came. You deserved his undivided attention right now when you’re so close. When you opened up to him in your moment of vulnerability. Or just horny hours but, whatever.

“Satoru please, please ohh—” a longer and low moan. There it is. Oh, how goodamn euphoric. Goddess. “Fuck… mmmm….” A soft exhale. You must have come. He heard the sounds of you catching your breath and some silence. Then, you let out a pleased and breathy laugh before the audio message ended. It reminded him of a content kitten purring.

Oh yeah, he has to call Nanami to pick up his cat. He’s just gonna have to deal with Gatomon for another day because he won’t be getting up anytime soon. 

Now that the shock is wearing off and his cock his straining and leaking in his boxer briefs, Satoru finally slid them off. Taking his heavy and hot cock into his hands, he pressed play again. He considered sending his own audio message, but he’d rather just surprise you later at your door. 

This time, he groaned and moaned along with your sweet sounds. He tried to imagine whatever it was you were fantasizing. Maybe riling you up, teasing you and saying degrading little things. Staying composed while he winds you up and then makes fun of you for getting so turned on. You’d look so pretty with your eyes watering in frustration and arousal.

He wants to make you cry and feel embarrassed before it gets to be too much and you start acting like a brat again. You’ll switch things up on him, maybe pin him down and tease him back.

Oh that made his cock leak and throb even more. Cursing, Satoru began to pump faster.

Would you give him a little slap while you tease him and make him hold it all in? Until he’s frustrated and begging you to do something. Begging to be inside you.

Fuck, what if you pulled on his hair or gave him another slap and laughed at him, “awww, feeling frustrated? getting a little desperate to fuck me and come, pretty boy?”

Ohshitohshitohshit is all Satoru thinks before he comes all over his abdomen.

                                           ・❥・

Thinking back to how you went out on a date and how late your messages were sent, Satoru guesses today is your day off. 

He’s surprised that you hadn’t said anything after what you did last night, but you were probably trying to pretend it didn’t happen. Maybe you hoped it somehow didn’t deliver due to him being out of the country. He can imagine all these scenarios going through your head in an attempt to avoid dealing with this.

Too bad for you, he’ll never forget what he heard. Maybe it’s the Six Eyes, maybe he’s just a man, but that’s ingrained into his mind forever. He even walked to your place whistling a happy tune. Your power!

After fucking into his own hand like when he was younger, hornier and desperate, the fog lifted. His mind was clear and he was just left with the knowledge that you missed him. 

You were independent and didn’t really need him, but you still missed him. Just like he missed you. He loved Yuuta, but the kid was still so gloomy and not that funny. Not the most exciting company this past month.

Satoru hoped you hadn’t had lunch yet, because he didn’t and ordered some takeout to have with you. As he reached your apartment and went to your door, he thought about how you’d react to seeing him. 

If your face reddened in embarrassment and unreasonable anger over your own actions, muah! If you stuttered or hastily shut the door in his face, chef’s kiss. 

He thought of this as he knocked and waited for you to open the door. When it opened, he was met with a pleasing sight. As the old people say, a sight for sore eyes. 

Okay, he was kinda hoping you were still wearing his shirt. Instead, you were wearing an oversized washed out graphic t-shirt and lounge shorts. Still cute. Maybe he should leave the shirt he’s currently—

“Satoru!” 

He managed to turn off Infinity right before you jumped up to wrap your arms around his neck in a hug. He heard a muffled you’re back early, missed you as your face was buried in his neck.

You’ve complained about how standing on your tip toes while hugging or kissing him is uncomfortable after a while because he’s so freakishly tall, so he rests his hands on the small of your back so you can lean your weight onto him. 

Every stupid and witty thing he was thinking of saying left his brain. You smelled like soap and roses and were so warm from the shower or bath you must have just had. 

“Have you ate? I brought some crepes,” He asked, still holding you as you hadn’t let go. 

At that, shook your head and leaned back to look at him. “That sounds so good right now. Actually, I have strawberries and whipped cream if you wanna make it even sweeter,” you laughed peering up to look at his eyes behind his sunglasses.

Oh you knew him so well. Telling the restaurant to put extra wasn’t enough, he definitely needs it sweeter! To the point where the restaurant thinks it’s some sort niche order.

Before he could answer, you lowered his glasses with one hand and softly rubbed below his eye with a finger, “You look really tired, wanna take a nap first?” You murmured, then rolling your eyes. “On my ‘small ass bed’.”

Without letting him answer, you pulled away from him. You grabbed the takeout in one hand and held his own hand with the other. Setting the food on your messy kitchen counter, you led him to your bedroom and gently pushed him onto the pretty silk sheets. 

When you settled next to him, he automatically wrapped himself around you, resting his cheek on your collarbone. You removed his sunglasses and set them aside before slowly and softly scratching his head the way he likes.

Oh this shit felt soooo good, he’d purr if he had the energy. He was pretty tired, actually. 

You were smaller than he was, but you were warm and surprisingly comforting. He hadn’t realized how comforting you were until this moment. How much he just missed being with you. Again, he was surprised that you missed him too.

Your affection for him made his heart hurt a little. Weird, maybe he should get that checked out. He nuzzled into your neck before kissing you there.

“I know you’re the strongest or whatever,” you mumbled, letting one hand wander to rub over his shoulder blades. “but you work too much. People in your life expect too much from you.” 

You were spoiling him. He really didn’t deserve this, but he’s greedy. He’ll take whatever you give him, because it’s from you. He even wants to give. He wishes he can make you feel the way you’re making him feel right now.

He was half-asleep and wasn’t sure if he answered or not, but his last thought before completely falling asleep was that neither of you had remembered to mention what happened last night. This was much better.