#yall having a baby brother changed me a LOT lmao

[prismweaver]

if bonnie takes this baby from my arms one more time we're gonna have words

[ayoharuko]

Genshin Impact Bf Headcanons

 Hi everyone I'm back yay!😊

I'm feeling a bit better so i decided to just make a part 2 instead of snoozing around....

I hope u guys enjoy this part and I'm sorry for the wrong spelling or bad Grammer.

I also apologize if the headcanons are a bit occ or not canon at all these are headcanons after all. i wrote this on my laptop

Also one more thing I'll apologize for is sometimes the writing style will change like last time it might look nice and now its....just a bit not nice?? Does that make sense? sorry sorry I'm getting side tracked....

I just had my adhd moment−

oh even if i wanted to copy the same style as i did last time I'm too lazy to check the last post probably cause I'm derived of sleep and surviving with coffee ok fr imma stop-

REMINDER: All these characters belong to hoyoverse and does not belong to me (•ˋ _ ˊ•)

Anywaysss hope u enjoy this!

(Liyue Boys)

~Ajax my boi~ (Childe, Tartagila)

~Possessive Boyfriend~

• I had a debate between possessive or overprotective since he's technically both, a cunning fox and a blood thirsty wolf, but possessive takes the cake for me hahaha

• He doesn't like people's eyes on you. makes him jealous but he also likes peoples eyes on you. makes him prideful to show off that your he's

• Definitely leaves marks on you like obvious places too!

• If you fight or have a vision and can fight expect him to train with you, help you with your tasks and spar aka fight with you just to see who's stronger lmao

• Buys you expensive gifts when he's away(That fatui money yuh~✨)

• PLEASE BE CAREFUL NOT TO MAKE HIM JEALOUS. i feel like if he gets like really jealous your walking card....gone bish✨ and that person ✨G O N E✨

• Like when you met traveler he full on THOUGHT that were flirting with you and actually kind off threatened them-

• He siblings/family already adore you even if they haven't met you yet, they just know your a very nice person because of what teucer tells them!

• Speaking of teucer.....he probably loves you more then he's big brother....lol jk..or maybe...? But teucer loves you a lot since he sees you make he's big brother really happy all the time and also because your very nice and play with him a lot! This makes childe very happy since he knows he doesn't have to worry about he's siblings hating you.

• If you can't cook expect him to cook breakfast or dinner and also if he's free and yall live together he could also clean the house if you want~

• He always has hearts in he's eyes whenever you guys are together and for once the people around him and see a Slight sparkle in he's eyes

•  He's your overprotective but possessive wolf and he would go crazy if something happens to you...

• You guys go on dinner dates especially if your both are in Snezhnaya

• He kinda keeps you a secret from the fatui but sometimes he can't help but brag about you still being careful with he's word of course 

• He loves you...a lot...but sometimes it can be... a little....crazy

Nicknames: Mine, Babe and baby

Voice line about you: Heyyy there comrade! I see your getting quite comfy with y/n over there....what nono..I'm not assuming you of anything I'm jjust gonna let you know their mine....alright? Good! dont want you sealing them now haha!

When he talks to you: Hiya babe~ what? You didn't like the way i talked to traveler? oh come on the were sealing all your attention from me tho~!

~Old Man Morax~ (Zhongli)

~Gentleman boyfriend~

• I don't imagine him as a jealous or possessive person since he's lived through so many years he probably has high patience. However doesn't mean he's not  overprotective since he's basically lost a lot of things in he's life he always make sure your safe, your eating well, water etc always cares about your health.

• Hu tao at one point has told you both that you remind her of an old married couple....and i think she's right-

• He wakes up before you and prepares you both tea not before admiring your sleepy face of course❣

• Cooks breakfast(Imagine him in an apron😫)for you both and cleans you guys house when your at work just him being a malewife🥺

• Would always open doors for you, buy you flowers(When he has mora) and buys you thinks when he's out in liyue(Again if he has mora otherwise its childes-)

• When you first made him lunch as a surprise at work he had the most heart warming smile ever like smiling while eating the food you cooked and just praising you constantly as well. Hu tao was jealous you didn't make her lunch lol

• At one point of you guys relationship he told the whole truth about him being an ex-god and even showed he's dragon form just so you would believe him.... and thank the archons you still accepted him for who he was and loved him...

• Sometimes when you guys are at the comfort of your house he lets out he's horns and tail so you can pet or touch them which he likes very much and you end up with a big dragon on you-

• Xiao has definitely been watching over you and zhongli knows it...he's grateful that even if he's not present xiao will be the one to watch over you🥺😭

• You guys would be outside at the sunset enjoying your tea and just overall chilling...those are he's favorite moments with you❤

• You guys can be found strolling around liyue just looking at the beautiful city

• He appreciates how you try and listen to he's tales even if he knows that some of them are boring and makes you fall asleep but he still appreciates in you trying to listen.

• Arguments would almost never happen in your relationship of course excluding you guys disagreements but zhongli tries to avoid arguing with you since he hates yelling and overall just hates seeing you mad.

• Even in a million years he would never stop being over in heels inlove with you💕

Nicknames: My gem, dear and my beloved

Voice line about you: “Hm...traveler..would you perhaps think that this would look nice on y/n? You think it would? Alright then I'll be taking this then. What? Oh...m-mora i..uhm..forgot my wallet again it seems...apologies..I'll pay you back traveler”

When he talks to you: “Dear i must thank you for this....it tastes marvelous”

~Baby Xiao~ (Alatus)

~Shy But Overprotective Boyfriend~

• He's both shy but very overprotective of you. Like he thinks your made of glass so he always watches you. minus when he has to go fight demons at night of course, but he always wants you to stay at the hotel when its night time since he knows how dangerous it is when its night time at liyue. if you have errand to do however...except him to come with you even if he hates large crowds.

• He'll only come and see you when you bring him food or call out he's name. and that was at like at least a few months into your relationship with him. The reason for this is because he doesn't want he's karma to affect you since your the only light he has.

• He only eats whatever you cook as he thinks their exceptional to he's taste. girl he actually thinks your cooking is delicious thats why lol

• He LOVES headpats and LOVES kisses on the forehead. FIGHT ME I DARE YOU🙂

• When you hug him he turns red in an instant and then relaxes but sometimes(Sadly) pushes you off of him...since he's too scare of he's karma going to you😭, meaning he's always running away from you....

• But there are sometimes when you convince him to stay...and when he does stay...he lets you do whatever you please with him. Thats including kisses, reassurance, comfort and cuddles for the baby💕

• If you get hurt he instantly blames himself. So you have to reassure him that it isn't he's fault whatsoever.

• He brings you Qingxin flowers he's favorite flowers and leaves it at your nightstand if you live in the hotel its a reminder from him to you that he loves you and that he always watches over you.

• At every affection you give him it doesn't matter if big or small he always turns red since that how much he had fallen for you. 

• Ya know you'll feel like you have a guard dog always watching you....in a good way

• Always dreads the day you'll have to leave him...he knows your a mortal...he knows their fragile and weak...but he just doesn't wanna let you go...your he's only weakness and the only one who shows he's love for.

Nicknames: My light(Rarely)

Voice line about you: “What? I'm not looking at y/n...your simply imagining....”

When he talks to you: “You called? H-huh? Cuddles? I suppose it won't hurt...just this once...I'll humor you..you mortal”

~Bookworm Boi~ (Xingqiu)

~Prince Boyfriend~ 

• He might act like a prince but he is still a bookworm...but we love he's nerdy side so thats fine!

• Since xingqiu’s basically rich he definitely knows how to act like a gentleman...although before he fall inlove with you i like to think he had ignored every person who he's family set him up with..so they were surprised to find out that he suddenly took an interest in you.

• There are sometimes where he pays more attention to he's books more then you but please dont worry he loves you😊

• Buys books that he thinks makes you think of him. i mean he does have the money-

• He thought of a love story that was about you both and wrote it down...but writing it down poor Chongyun had to since our water boi’s hand-writing sucks, but it was worth it since it was very romantic and cute⁓

• He also writes poems about you and then read them to you in the afternoon under a tree while your napping either on he's shoulder or lap.

• Compliments everyday baby💕

• HE'S A MF TEASE. like you see the pranks or things he does to poor Chongyun?? I feel bad for you both😔

• When he's not occupy with a book you both are walking around liyue either buying things at stalls, books or food really anything he's down.

• Yelan watches over you both. like sometimes she'll treat you both to a restaurant and she'll sit in another table while you both have your meal(She pays for it too)Basically she observers how you both interact with each other and finds you both cute🥺

• Overall he's a real prince to you minus being a bookworm

Nicknames: My liege and love

Voice line about you: “This book reminds me of them....lets buy it”

When he talks to you: “Hm? You would like my attention? Hehe...alright then my liege..I'll give you what you want~”

~Precious Exorcist~ (Chongyun)

~Shy Boyfriend~

• Now him...he's 100% baby

• Whenever you touch him he short circuits. My boi knows nothing about girls-. Xinyan or yun jin obviously don't count, When we're talking about periods...its a different story....

• But he's very sweet and cares for you!, always senses when your upset/sad and immediately tries to cheer you up.

• Your he's meat shied if xingqiu comes looking for him...he tries to avoid he's friend quite a lot.

• Xingqui teases you both well mainly chongyung about how much he's a simp for you hehe...

• He always stutters when he talks to you. with the blush too!

• He's always on a look out for evil spirits or demons since he wants to protect you. When you have a nightmare he blames it on demons and he's dislike towards them increases.

• Like how yelan would watch over you and xingqiu. Shenhe watches over the both of you as a protector since she knows that chongyung still has a lot to learn and even if doesn't wanna admit it...she worries for you both.

• Shares he's popsicles with you💘

Nicknames:(Sadly no nickname he's too shy yall)

Voice line about you: “I-i get it now xingqui! g-geez...i..love them..a lot..”

When he talks to you: “H-how are you? O-oh fine? thats good...uhm..would you like to go to xinyan’s concert tomorrow?”

And that concludes our liyue boys!

tysm for reading this far everyone and again I'm sorry for the grammer or spelling mistakes o(*￣▽￣*)ブ

I hope u guys enjoyed this one my brain kinda hurtled from thinking this much headcanons lol

But it was worth it I'm proud to have finish part 2!. Now part 3 will be maybe after a few days and its the inazuma boys this time yay💕

But yea tysm for reading this far everyone mua mua~!💕✨

[delicrieux]

—MAKE YOU SAY “OH” EXTRAS: TINDER

extra meaning non-canonical occurrence; can be placed anywhere in the “make you say oh” timeline after couple (cha. 14) and before the final “oh”. 

pairing—corpse husband x f!reader warnings—tinder profiles, tw: men, swearing.  word count—2.6k. format— written. ─── ❥ req by nonnie​:  y/n makes a youtube vid/live stream where she's just swiping through her tinder acc and corpse literally blocks her lmao

author’s note—akldsljfs this was such a funny idea i could not not write it lmao

ultimate masterlist. myso masterlist

You have pulled the biggest brain move by setting up both a facecam and a screen recorder on your phone. All is beautifully displayed and visible during the stream. Your fanbase is particularly intrigued on what exactly are you planning on doing today, seeing as your tweet of “strea” had been a bit vague, if not downright ominous. No emojis. No elaboration. You couldn’t even be bothered to finish the word. Truly, a mystery. Everyone tuned in and are currently waiting with bated breath.

A few of your fans must sense upcoming doom because the overall mood in the chat turns from optimistically intrigued to...evil. It’s an entity all on it’s own now, clawing at you through the screen with various renditions of laughter and devil emojis. A few eggplants thrown in there for good measure, accompanied, naturally, by the scandalous water drops. At first the common consensus is that you’re biting the bullet and going through your camera roll on stream. Definitely an idea worth considering, though you frankly don’t know what lies at the start of the 11k photograph journey, and you are afraid to check in public. Could be a harmless meme, could be a salacious pic you had saved of an OF star. It’s really a gamble. Either way, you would definitely get banned. You might still get banned. Why do you insist on doing shit like this?

Because it’s funny. Because you’re kinda stupid. Because it’s just so absolutely laughably easy to do.

A smile quirks your lips, and while it is not explicitly smug, the look in your eyes sure is, “Greetings,” You utter lowly, dimming the lights--the budget for this stream! Ugh, you went all out, “my children.”

mother i crave violence

sensing evil energy rn!!

i do not claim the energy in this video for myself or anyone else watching this 💖💖

^with peace and love shut the fuck up

“I know y’all lowkey hoes-” Upon your words the chat splits into two: one side eagerly agrees (even shares a few OF accounts! How helpful, supporting small businesses!), whilst the other feverishly insists on innocence. You make a face stuck somewhere between offended and bewildered, “Now c'mon now-I know you. I know you all. We’re the same, don’t-what was that?”

You try to scroll back to the comment but it’s loss in the sea of incoming messages, “I swear to God I just saw-”

Corpse_Husband: i love late night streams it’s not like i have anything better to do.

“COOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORPSE!!!!” 

rip headphone users

i cant feel my face when im with you by the weeknd but instead of face its my fucking ears

yall think full vol on pc is better?my parents woke up 😭😭😭😭

To think he’s spending his last waking moments for today with watching you (he probably still would have anyway, because you do not posses an ounce of shame or self-control and pester him relentlessly)! It makes your heart sing, and suddenly, a traitorous, fun hating idea barges it’s way through the crowd of incoherent buzzing and states: don’t do this. For some reason it also has the voice of Rae. As if that would work in guilt-tripping you- Rae never succeed, and her fictitious rendition in mind won’t fare much better either.

Still, you thought about it. That must count for something. Corpse will understand, won’t he? Why don’t you want to upset it in the first place? Men look so funny when they lose their shit, like hello, don’t you have anything better to do? But the image of Corpse just sitting there, hurt, distraught, leaving you on seen because he’s in his sad boy hours leaves a sour taste in your mouth. 

queen rly went from  🥺😊 to 😕 u ok bbgirl?

Corpse_Husband: no pouts cutie

akjdjoeijdfse cUTIE??? deadass boutta r.i.p.

Well that succeeded in eliminating everything from mind, doubts included. If this was an anime, the scenery would shift into something roseate, with flowers and bubbles and sparkles all around you along with a halo or two. Alas, not an anime, rather reality. The led-lights, however, seemingly possessing a will of their own, slowly turn from deep violet to pink. You smile brightly, like the absolute dumbass you are, and you are met with a ray of heart and blushing emojis. You are just so cute, a real cutie! Still in your disguise adorable state, you swipe your finger on your phone screen, the grin never leaving your lips.

There, among the plethora of apps, nestled sits a red square with a white fire plastered on it. The delicate calligraphy on the bottom reads: TINDER.

The mood changes once again- you’re giving the roaches emotional instability by how quickly everything flips over- and the chat spams eggplants vigorously; some, of course, bravely fight against the thirst.

nooooooo i thought y/n is gonna stream in a god honoring way!!!

^pack it up girl defined

“So, Charlie and I-” You note a few awfully curious comments and squint, “-yes, we talk a lot. Charlie is a really good friend of mine. We’re best friends. Brothers. Sisters. Cousins. The whole fucking family tree-no, that sounds weird. Delete. Anyway, Charlie, being the absolute fucker he is, said, hey, you know what would be funny? And I was like, nooo, what would be funny, Charlie? And he says to me, he says, says, making fun of men on Tinder. And if y’all need any more proof that Charlie and I are platonic soulmates, then dunno, my children, my roaches, I dunno-I dunno what more to give you.”

You can’t be bothered reading the comments, there’s too damn many. You also need to save your reading comprehension for the actual bios. It has a time limit, that darn thing. 

“Okay, so I made a profile earlier, but I hadn’t swiped on anyone yet-” Despite the fact, Tinder helpfully informs you that already 99+ people have swiped right on you, “So, this is me,” You show the pictures you have of yourself, and damn, not to be a conceited narcissist, but you look really good. Like if you saw yourself on Tinder, you’d super like instantly. “Uhm, so, my bio-my bio says: let’s sauce in the tub together, ya dig? splishy splashy, giggle giggle.” 

i cant believe we are witnessing y/n trying to form a coherent sentence live 

shes trying give her time

ya dig??? y not capeesh

what scene from the godfather is this lol?

“My anthem, is,” You laugh, covering your lips with your hand, “Corpsie, this is form you-” Proudly, you show that indeed, Corpse’s E-GIRLS ARE RUINING MY FUCKING LIFE is listed as your anthem on Spotify, “Hehe.” Yes, you say that aloud.

Corpse_Husband: you’re killing me Corpse_Husband: thanks baby Corpse_Husband: now delete tinder ❤︎

You ignore his last quip, deciding it’s finally time to get this show on the road, “Right, let’s do this shit. I’m not actually going to swipe on any guys that look, uh, decent? Yuck, can’t believe I just said that, uhm, because I-because I feel like some actually deserve a chance with someone? I don’t wanna get anyone’s hopes up, as I am currently in a long distance relationship with Chrollo. So I’m just gonna swipe on, like, frat boy assholes. Because I don’t care if I hurt their feelings. Quite frankly I don’t think they possess them in the first place.”

The chat voices their agreements. With the ground rules set, you, giddy, click on the first profile.

Does Tinder know what you’re doing, your plan? The FBI agent watching you through your phone must be working overtime, bless his heart. They must, because the the first guy to meet you is named Jason, and there he is, blond hair and blue eyes, holding up a fish the size of his torso. Marginally adequate in looks, pretty good muscles. A solid 7 bordering on 8. He’s the same age as you, 15 miles away, and he studies at some college you don’t care enough to look up. Bio reads:

I like to drive fast. Fishing is my passion, but if you can’t catch me by the ocean, you’ll catch me catching waves, bro! Love a good gym date. You do squats, and I’ll keep a close eye to make sure you’re doing it correctly ;) You probably saw me at a party. Leader of the The Phi Kappa Psi. I’m a Gemini, if that matters lol.

You, of course, read it aloud, dramatically; provide some constructive criticism-he seems nice, but he’s a Gemini, so naturally, you can’t trust him at all! Also, that gym date session leaves little to be desired. With your rant done, you swipe right, and shocker! (not), it’s an instant match.

“Okie, I still wanna swipe of some profiles, so I’ll see what he’ll text later-” For a second you wonder the legalities of this stream, but you’re having too much fun to think of it further, “guys, I won't get sued, right?”

NOW she considers it

well....

if you do, we’ll kickstart your lawyer dw <3

Onto the next profile. Kevin, 25, is seen fixing his car- or, you assume he’s mid-fixing it, you don’t really know why else he’d hold a wrench and be covered in oil. He’s shirtless, and the caveman part of your brain echoes something closely resembling AWOOOGA!, but...but!...blonde hair, blue eyes. You pout again, “I don’t...I don’t really like blond boys, ya know? With the blue eyes and all, it’s just not my thing, uhm, unless it’s like-like...Armin from Attack on Titan. Else I don’t care.”

Onto the bio:

You have to treat a car like you treat a woman: go on long rides, take the lead, but most importantly, keep her oiled up 😜 

“What the fuck did I just read?”

The chat is equally confused. You swipe right anyway- another match. Too easy.

The stream continues without incident for a solid thirty minutes- all of your matches, expect a few that genuinely looked like normal dudes that really couldn’t write a decent bio to save their lives, had been blond hair blue eyed gym rats with ranging forms of misogyny. Some opened with asking for nudes out right, some asked about your day first before asking for nudes. You prefer the former. Straight to the point! You admire the gall. 

But then, down the forty-five minute mark a profile popped up that made you still by your phone, your smile dying as your eyes bulged. Dear God. Lord in heaven. Who is this demonspiit lookalike and why is he so fucking hot? The neck tats, the skateboard, the clothes- holy shit, you gotta close your mouth before some drool dribbles out.

No bio, just his name, Tyler, and that he’s 23.

“He boutta be 23 in me.” You mutter, swiping right with lightning speed.

WHAT DID SHE SAYYYYY?????????

tyler is y/ns karma for relentlessly mocking that one guy that had a whole ass list on what his “female” partner should be

^he deserved it and also tyler seems like a typical fuckboi y/n grow a braincell

look at mom 🥺 her eyes are sparkling

It wasn’t a match right away. You somehow expected as much, but it still upset you. Simp behavior, pathetic. The stream continued bravely, and when Tyler messaged you a simple “yo” you totally didn’t sequel. You didn’t manage to text him back on stream: texting all those guys that you didn’t really find all that attractive was easy, but this...You’re a sucker for a man who radiates red flag energy. His whole profile is a red flag. He might just be a red flag himself.

What can you do? Suddenly becoming color blind is not easy. Once the stream ends, you unmatch with everyone expect Tyler. He you chat with for a bit, but a sudden craving for different company makes you abandon him, too. You don’t feel too heartbroken for him- you’re certain there’s already too many girls in his dms. You wish them luck.

Happily, you delete Tinder. You go to Twitter, notice you’re trending again- look at you go! Queen shit- and as you compose a thank you tweet, something strange happens. You go to text Corpse, but when you click on his profile you grow cold.

YOU’RE BLOCKED. You can’t follow or see @/Corpse_Husband ‘s Tweets. 

...Pardon? You hop onto Instragram and-also blocked. Seriously? And you thought you’re one petty bitch. Corpse is seriously prissy about everything. Damn, if he didn’t like your stream, he could’ve just said so. Didn’t need to, like, block you from his internet existence. So not cool.

You try texting him but no text go through. Well how will you let him know you deleted Tinder just like he asked? You relieve your frustrations by punching your pillow a few times. Later, you apologize to her, you didn’t mean to hurt her, it’s not her, it’s you. Fuck, 5 minutes of exile and you’re already loosing your mind.

“Raeeeeeeeeeeee!” You whine loudly. It’s roughly 2am now, but you don’t care. You’re too heartbroken to care. There’s a thump from her room, but nothing else, “Raeeeeeeeee!!!” You wail, wallowing in self-pity on your bed. You hear a very loud, very annoyed sigh from her room, followed by angry marching. Your door is abruptly thrown open, and in the dim, colorful light you see her scowl.

“What?” She grits.

“Can you please tell Corpse to unblock me from everything?”

“What did you do now?”

“I made fun of men on Tinder.”

She pauses, “...That doesn’t sound so bad.” She surmises, voice laced with suspicion, “What else?”

“...There was one really hot guy that I kinda sorta talked to after--”

“Y/n.”

“-But I totally deleted Tinder and honestly he was pretty boring, so, like, uhm, please?”

She sighs, the servery of which implies she is holding the weight of the world on her shoulders, and instantly you know that you won. She taps away at her phone, “You owe me one.” She states, and before you can reply, she exits your room and slams the door behind her.

Grinning, you text his phone again. The message goes through, oh gosh, you’re so relieved you feel like crying. This has been, officially, the worst five minutes of your life.

You Y DID U BLOCK ME LOSER!!! MAJOR LOSER ALERT!! I DELETED EVERYTHING IT WAS A JOKE r u still mad at me? y u always mad at me i never do anything:(

my husband You’re my baby, how do you think I’ll react when I see you publicly simping for some asshole on Tinder?

Oh no, he used the words, he delivered the killing blow. You’re finished. Your heart can’t take such a workout. 

Not that you would ever admit it to him, though!

You hehe ur jellyyyy u always dis jealous hehe?

my husband Not jealous.

Yeah, you might not be the brightest tool in the shed, but even you know that’s a lie. You send him an array of kissy emojis that he doesn’t have the decency to reply to. Then, completely unprompted and dead serious, you send him a simple voice memo, saying: “You really have nothing to worry about, you know? You’re my favorite, Corpsie.”

He responds via text, reiterating that he’s not fucking jealous and that he just doesn’t like when you show such outward interest in anyone but it’s not like he cares or anything. It’s just really, like, weeeeird to see his baby simping for another man like that totally ruins the whole dynamic!!! It was only natural that he should block you on every social media platform, including his personal number (which, like, was completely necessary! Doesn’t matter that his viewers can’t see it, it’s gotta be super believable!), and inform his followers of that, because it’s all a joke, like, for the dynamic, that Youtube grind, you know? Ya dig? No personal feelings were involved at all. He totally wasn’t upset that you found someone else cute, no way!

my husband I’m not jealous. Lol.

You ik u repeated tht like 50 times  u trynna convince me or??? lmao

my husband No comment. ...You don’t actually talk to anyone else like we’re talking, right?

You no one else calls me their baby if thts wat ur wondering at least not to my knowledge lol im all urs

my husband That makes me very happy to hear:)

Yeah, it makes you very happy, too.

hope you liked it!! xx

[alleycat-arcade]

Game Start... The Seven Lords: Love Paradise...

...

Why do I look so dejected? It's nothing, don't worry about it. Hmm? Oh, I don't think you want to play that machine. I've only seen a specific group of regulars playing that one.

Are you sure? Alright, if you insist. Let me know if you need any games to cleanse your palette.

(My friends are being little bastards again and asked me to make this for them. They offered me something I couldn't refuse, a get out of Gay Baby Jail free card. Anyway, I hope yall get some form of joy from this lmao.)

Housedemon Headcanons (Obey Me! Shall We Date?: Brothers Part 1)

Content Warnings: Crackish?, but the rest is fluff, Potential out of chara stuff, and pre-established relationship(Since this is a play on the phrase housewife and or malewife), some mature content

⚝──⭒─⭑─⭒──⚝

Lucifer:

How? How did you manage to get him to leave the House of Lamentation AND Diavolo so he could live with you in the human world? And a better question is, how did you convince him that the Devildom won't burn down in his absence, be it by his brothers or even the demon prince himself?

The best case scenario I can imagine is that the two of you go back and forth between the two realms. The two of you stay in your home in the human world for at most a month every now and then, and spend the rest of the time in the Devildom. But while you're in your cozy little home with just the two of you, you do your best to make sure he does as little work as possible. That means you end up being the one to pay the bills while Luci takes care of the house.

He was originally against the idea of staying home, he had even started looking for jobs in the area. But, he does love you, and if you really want him to be a "housedemon", he'll eventually give in. ("Mc, it's fine. I can pick up a decent paying office job around here at this nearby company." "Luci, honey. I love you, but what company is going to hire someone named Lucifer? Did you already forget that you were too stubborn to change the name on our marriage certificate to a fake one?")

But to be honest, he enjoys having the time away from paperwork and dealing with his brothers. Lucifer is a lot more relaxed than usual, especially when you return home.

Your house is pretty much clean all the time, since Luci usually cleans up messes long before they get out of control. Since he's used to having a routine most of the time, he likes to keep a similar one in the Human World.

He usually has all his daily housework done by the time you get home. Typically, you can find him in his study or in the living room listening to something on his record player and reading a novel. On the rare occasion you catch him watching something on TV, but he's quick to shut it off when he hears you come in.

The way his eyes soften and he gives you a gentle smile when you come in the door? C'est magnifique. It's the same smile you usually see when you bring him coffee and urge him away from his paperwork back in the Devildom, but it lacks that sense of fatigue he usually has.

If you're home before he starts on dinner, he's there waiting for you. If you do come home around the time he's still cooking it, it is the perfect opportunity to sneak up behind him and give him a hug. Devildom dishes are much different than human dishes, and many human ingredients are easily ruined in a short span of time, so he's usually pouring most of his attention into that. You can surprise him if you're quiet enough, but most of the time he'll let you do it anyway. Should you happen to be taller than him, press a soft kiss against the top of his head for some added softness to the chuckle he lets out when he feels your arms around his waist. Don't try and do this back home in the Devildom though, he'll likely think one of his brothers is messing with him and you'll get a wing to the face.

Side-note: Somehow a few issues from the Devildom trickle between the cracks and Lucifer has to return for a moment. Usually it's about minor issues that he can run there and back in less than a day to take care of, but when it happens at some of your "private" moments Luci's in a fairly pissy mood for a hot minute. You cannot count the number of calls for help you got from the brothers on your D.D.D. when they had called at the climax of the two of you's downtime to tell Luci that somehow one of them lit Hell's Kitchen on fire.

Mammon:

Mammon isn't fully against the idea, but he may need some encouraging. He just wants to make sure he keeps his Greed in check for you and you don't end up hurt or broke from it. If you snuck a peek at some of the books he's been reading lately, you can tell he's trying his best. The covers range from "How to Deal with a Gambling Addiction", to "The Best Ways to Keep a House Neat and Tidy: For Demons". Don't point it out to him too soon though, or he'll go bright red and deny everything. Mams is a lot tamer with his whole tsundere thing now that he put a ring on your finger, but it still slips in every now and then.

When he moves in with you in the Human World, like his older brother, he immediately offers to get a job to pay some bills. Except, unlike Luci, he wasn't as stubborn to refuse putting a pseudonym on the marriage certificate. (Your Devildom one has his name on it anyway.) But, Mammon is very weak for his beloved human, some pleading and puppy eyes and he's putty in your hands.

There's a little mess around the house sometimes, but it never lasts too long. He's usually pretty good at keeping the house clean, aside from a stray dirty towel or a few dishes left out in the sink. If his brothers are coming over, he deep cleans the house. They likely don't pick on him as much since he's not in the Devildom as often as usual(and he's genuinely improved from your presence in his life). His brothers do nearly have a heart attack when they come in to the intense smell of lemon and fresh linens, not to mention Mammon in an apron tending to some indoor plants.

Mammon seems like the type who'd never think they'd like gardening, but actually loves it when they get into it. There is a ton of fresh veggies in his garden that he usually uses to cook with, but he grows a separate garden purely for corn. Why? To feed his adoring crows of course! He pretty much has a fan club of entirely crows that land in the backyard on a set schedule. They don't leave much of a mess behind though, but Mammon probably asks them not to. He likely also grows some flowers as well, but most of them are for you. Ones that remind him of you, ones that you say you like, et cetera et cetera.

You don't need to adopt a dog to have a Golden Retriever come barreling down the stairs to give you a hug and cover you in kisses when you come home. No matter what time it is, if he's not cooking or asleep, he's booking it to greet you at the door. Mammon will get all blushy if you playfully tease him about it, probably ends up just burying his face in your neck and muttering about it.

His cooking is fairly decent, but he did burn a few things when he was getting the hang of it. He does like indulging in some fast food or some spicy ramen when he just doesn't have the energy to cook, usually after a visit from his brothers. The two of you will just sit on the couch and watch something you both enjoy while sharing a blanket and having dinner.(Bonus points if its a cheesy Rom-Com)

Side-note: While he may not act like it or be given respect of the title most of the time, he IS the Avatar of Greed and one of the strongest demons in the Devildom. So, he'll likely be called back every now and then. If you're not working that day, he'll take you with him and the two of you just spend the rest of the night out on the town in the Devildom. Perhaps he may indulge a little in gambling with your supervision, as a treat. If you are working and can't get out of it, he'll bring you back cute little souvenirs. You might find an extra large extra cursed Zombie Iguana plush laying on your couch when he gets back.

Leviathan:

"Lol okay" ..."Wait, seriously?"

Levi is still trying to wrap his head around the fact that you two are married in the first place, but now you want to have him live with you in the Human World with just the two of you? He's gonna need a moment hang on. Okay, okay he's good now. But seriously, he'd likely be one of the easiest to get out of the Devildom. He will need a bit to make sure he packs up a good chunk of his stuff and Henry 2.0 to bring to the house and the rest will remain at home with the strongest protection spells he can manage on his room. Lotan probably keeps guard in there as well.

He is a little apprehensive at the idea of not helping out paying for things since he's taken up Part-time jobs for extra Grimm before, but he eases into it with some reassurance. Plus, when you call him your cute little housedemon he feels like he is going to melt into the floor.

He does his best to keep things neat and tidy, but sometimes he gets too enraptured in a different task that he forgets about the other he was about to do. The two of you make it a sort of bonding activity to do some of the leftover housework together on your off days. He doesn't mind when his brothers drop by, but he does ask them to wipe their shoes/take off their shoes when they come in the door. The brothers at first assumed that the cleanliness was from you and that wherever he games at is a mess, but when they can't find much more that some trash that hasn't been taken out yet and a little dust, they're definitely surprised. The main thing that doesn't surprise them is seeing Levi in an oversized Ruri-chan shirt while cleaning.

Hobbies wise, streaming is something probably obvious that he does. He doesn't do it for any intention of money though, he just likes interacting with other people who play the same games or share the same interests as him. You're a mod in his chat, and he you can hear how happy he is when you pop in to say hi during your lunch break. If he gains enough confidence, he'll ask you if he can commission someone for a Vtuber avatar. Other than streaming, he does enjoy sewing an assortment of items. Mostly cosplay stuff, but he's sewn you and him matching plush toys, matching Halloween costumes, and any tears or rips in your clothes.

Depending on how late in the day it is, he may be asleep on the couch waiting for you with one of your favorite two player games up on the TV. You almost don't want to wake him up, but that sleepy smile he gives you when you do is too tempting to let him just lay there. There are actually rare days in which you return home earlier than him, which are when he needs to deal with things in the Devildom as Grand Admiral. Those nights, you cook up his favorite meal and wait for him to come home. Levi hasn't even managed to shrug his coat off or remove his hat at the door before he gets his welcome home kiss. Depending on the kind of day he's had, he might need a massage.

His cooking is alright, but he excels in baking. There's almost not a single day that there isn't a beautiful cake in the fridge that's themed after a character. One cannot describe the amount of joy in the room when it's time for the two of you to have dessert and you take turns feeding bites to each other. He's glad his brothers aren't around, so he doesn't have to hear the sounds of fake gagging.

Side-note: Levi actually begins to gain some confidence from your encouragement and just being around you all the time. He's still not too fond of social situations, but he's far more comfortable when he's holding your hand. So, the two of you do go to a handful of conventions together in matching cosplays.

Satan:

Honestly, Satan is all up for it. If he wasn't concerned for how his brothers would react, he'd pack up that night. He's more than happy to follow you to the ends of the Earth and back, considering just how much trust there is between the two of you to even marry in the first place.

"You want me to just take care of the house and then do whatever else I want?" "Yeah, basically." "So I can just read for as long as I want?" "Pretty much."

Jokes aside, he doesn't actually spend all of his time reading. A good chunk of it yes, but there's still plenty of time leftover to do other things since he doesn't have RAD to worry about.

The two of you adopt a cat not too long after he moves in. Don't worry if you're allergic, he's researched enough about cats to know which ones won't cause your allergies to flare up.

He's good at cleaning, but not at organizing. Sure, he can stack up his books in nice and neat piles, but for the love of- just put them back on the damn shelves. Satan can't say he's not surprised when he sees a few books on organization show up miraculously in his piles. He'll try his best for you, but his disorganization is a tough habit to break(probably started out of teenage rebellion lol).

Lucifer thinks you've replaced him with an identical copy when the brothers come to visit and the books are put up all neat and tidy, the laundry is folded and put away nicely, and the Avatar of Wrath is in the middle of cooking dinner in a vaguely cat-shaped pan.

Speaking of his brothers visiting, do ensure he knows long ahead of time so he can make sure his magical barriers on a certain closet is as strong as possible. He does not want to listen to centuries of teasing about all of his cat-themed clothing items. Not that he doesn't like them, he loves wearing them more than his regular clothes which is why you keep buying them for him. He also doesn't want them walking in when he's got his hair tied back and a "Kiss the Kitten" apron on.

Satan usually spends the times that he's done cleaning and he doesn't feel like reading watching a lot of Human World dramas with your shared cat on his lap. If he's really into a specific one, he'll sometimes leave it on while he's cleaning with the subtitles on and the TV loud enough for him to hear it over the vacuum cleaner. The neighbors may hate him, but he does not really care since he's doing it within the hours you're allowed to be loud anyway. Other than watching dramas or reading, I could see him picking up a little bit of fitness on the side. Something simple and stress relieving. Though you do have a punching bag downstairs if he's feeling particularly stressed.

You can pretty much expect Satan to be waiting up for you on the couch when you get home or in the kitchen. He'll smile and hold you close, but if he's feeling playful that day he may do a mixture of whining and teasing at you. Some nights you do get home very late and find him absolutely wiped out on the couch. If you're strong enough, he'd be more than happy to have you carry him to bed. If you aren't though, he's plenty happy waking up to you snuggling into his arms on the couch.

He doesn't head to the Devildom much, but it's usually with you if you're available. He does need to keep his connection network up and as an Avatar he does have some work to do. If you aren't there with him, he sends you a lot of messages throughout the day of just whatever he's thinking about or saw.

Side-note: He won't admit it in front of his brothers, especially not Levi, but he has been influenced by the third born a good bit. Every now and then Satan indulges in some story-rich video games or anime. He almost got caught in the middle of playing a game with anime scenes in it, but settled for throwing his D.D.D. as hard and far across the room as possible instead of getting caught. He'll only indulge in front of you.

⚝──⭒─⭑─⭒──⚝

(I had this already written for my friends who wanted it, and hadn't planned on posting it but the newest chapter on one of my fics is taking a little longer than usual. So, yeah, here we are. Do not look at me please. If there is any weird bits in it, please take it up with the simps in my friend group and discord.)

[sapphic-woes]

Finally finished TLK and my gosh, what a show. I really came in expecting a mediocre Viking piece but this was actually really good. The characters actually changed over the course of the show and became so interesting. The ending was quite satisfying. I do see what y'all mean that the female characters don't get treated well. So many of them except for like Aethelflaed rarely ever seemed like they had their own agency. Like their characters always revolved around others. Apart from that great show, solid 8/10. Thanks for recommending this.

A couple of my thoughts from the last episode.

"I shall of course need rooms with a sea view." Hol uppp how did Aelswith somehow become my fave?? What just happened?

"After everything we've given you" Edward stfu. Uthred has saved your ass thousands of times and you gonna come here with attitude? Edward officially can go suck a fuck.

I know the show is done but I really need a season 6 yall.

-🐝

THIS MAKES ME SO HAPPY YOU DONT EVEN KNOW!!!

I'm so happy you liked it in the end omfg. Like God YES it's crazy how Aelswith goes from the literal worst to the best, and God I hate Edward but he is so complex and well developed it's like he still holds a special place in my heart at the same time?? Though I feel like I can say that for sm characters lmao, everyone may be shitty people but they're well written shitty people.

Gosh gosh yeah they always miss writing female characters, and I think they really suffer from not understanding that they should be able to stand alone. Like they have moments of small things that rlly add, like Brida killing that shaman was a moment for me, as much as I think it was unnecessary, Hild's moral dilemma with killing was at least depicted pretty neatly, but overall their female characters just fall flat :/ Only out lady of Mercia and like, Eadith I'd say escaped that treatment.

God though curious about who your favs are and your fav moments??? I have sm but I'd have to say Eadith outting her brothers crimes, Uthreds speech honoring Alfred, literally any time our baby monk is on screen, Aelswith's prayer scene, mmm....I have a lot of favorite scenes😅

[itsdivineart]

Ok ok I wa s just asking cause like,,, the remake is like my baby and I do td high school for fun and my poor remake is like being ratioed so hard on ig and on here compared to high school au. Maybe cause the high school au highlights more characters or it’s way more fun and playful with less of a story and more so just fun doodles and the occasional drama yet lighthearted comic with it?? Remake is drama filled with more home hitting themes like homophobia

When I made The two aus, I planned on keeping all the serious shit in Remake and the lighthearted drama like relationship issues (like the whole Heather and Alejandro dating each other but being happier with other people which I will tackle in that lesheather comic, or Duncan and Courtney’s strained friendship, or The Drama brothers, or that one weed comic I have yet to release lmao??)

Theyre just way different tones you know??? High school gives more traction on my account but I have like so much love for the remake and I just really wanna actually complete that story yall. It’s been in the making since my birthday last year (November 2nd) and I just wanna see it flourish.

So, I’ll make sure to provide with both cause I know not everyone wants to sit through the same old “my parents are homophobic” dilemma and just want something simple. Kinda wish I changed that up but it’s like way too late now, already laid the foundation 🥺

But yeah I’m sorry just, I really want y’all to enjoy my stories cause I don’t make it for just me, I make it for y’all too and it makes me happy yall like it (but be honest, yall got favorites and Remake is not the favorite for a lot of you) but ima keep up with both 🥺

Cant this week tho cause I literally I’ve been ignoring my schoolwork for Remake and now im struggling so ❤️

[retroellie]

The Last of Us Headcannons

Summary: Headcannons about TLOU2 characters 

A/N: I’m sorry I haven’t posted in a bit, I’ve ben stressed so I thought I’d write for my comfort characters lmao 

Warnings: Slight NSFW mentions, TLOU2 spoilers 

Word count: 2.4K

Ellie

-This girl is the best girlfriend i swear

-She will always tell you she loves you when she leaves or even if she goes into the other room

-She’s lost a lot of people so she’s always telling you how much she loves you just in case

-Helping her when she has nightmares, especially after joel's death

-”Please don’t leave me.”

-“Ellie, I’m not going anywhere.” 

-She’s definitely a lover of old music

-80s and early 90s was definitely her favorite eras music and movies wise

-Gifting her records you found in abandoned buildings

-She draws you a lot, especially when you aren’t paying attention

-One time she couldn’t sleep so she drew you, she thought you looked peaceful asleep. That drawing is probably her favorite she’s ever done.

-You basically live with her in the garage she lives in

-Winters are always cold in the garage so y’all are basically attached to each other

-You both are cuddled up watching movies with tons of blankets on

-This girl is horny all the time, like if yall are alone she’s on top of you

-Dancing together at the dances

-This girl is so clingy omfg

-Ellie worries about the looks and comment yall get when showing affection in public so she tends to tone down her clinginess

-Joel loves you, point blank period

-When ellie tells you what joel did for her, you didn’t know if you should be happy or sad

-They were gonna take ellie away from you, you probably would've done the same

-”My life would have mattered.”

-”Your life matters to me.”

-You tried to make her feel better about it though, telling her that there would still be bad people and infected in the world

-Neck kisses from the back, my heart is melting holy shit

-She asks maria to put you on routes with her cause mama you are not going without her

-Puns, just puns all the time and you love it

-Definitely calls you babe and baby, you always make fun of her for it but she knows you loves it

-Yall make fun of each other but it’s all in good fun she will never take it too far

Joel

-You’re this mans baby idc

-No one hurts you or they will get tracked down and their knee caps will be gone

-Joel knows full well you can take care of yourself but he just gets so mad

-This man is so soft for you

-He tries to spoil you the best way he can, going out of his way to get you presents from abandon stores

-Teaches you how to play guitar

-He will have you sit in his lap and play the chords

-”Is it sounding better?”

-He just nods and kisses along your back

-He will sing you to sleep if you ask him

-This man has shown you some good ass music, yall sometimes just lay in bed and listen to old records

-He loves the way you look in his shirts, this man melts or bends you over the kitchen table

-He doesn’t cry often but this man is hurt

-The first time you saw him cry was when he broke down to you about ellie and the fireflies and what he did

-It hurt him a lot to admit it but he was so relieved that he could let go and someone be on his side for once

-Tells you all about sarah and how she would like you

-”She would’ve loved you.”

-”Yeah, casue i’m the coolest.”

-”You're a nerd.” He chuckled out

-He would happily tell you about life before the infection, what it was like to not have to look over your shoulder all the time

-He would never tell you about his time in boston

-He didn’t want to scare you, so you never asked but you had a good idea of what happened because of tommy

-Slow dancing in the kitchen while dinner is on the stove

-Forehead kisses in the morning when he has to leave for rounds and your dead to the world

-Calls you Babygirl and princess, IDK HE JUST SEEMS LIKE THE TYPE OKAY

-His voice in the morning>>>>>>

-Will watch you dance from a far while at dances

-Takes you out on little dates, he doesn’t even care about the stares yall (The age gap)

-He is prepared for anything to happen so he loves you like it’s his last day

-Talks about having kids with you but is okay if you don’t want them, i mean he’s not sure if he wants another one but hell, He said he wasn’t going to date anymore but here we are

-If you want kids he doesn't care hold old he is, he will try and try and try to give you a child 

-”Damn it i got my period.” 

-”Well then I reckon we gotta try again, huh baby girl.” He says with a smirk 

-This man has a daddy kink and that’s all i gotta say about that umm anyways

-He is madly in love with you and he shows it, he has lost too many people and he has the mindset of “Good things don’t last forever”

Tommy

-I love this man with all my heart, he’s my baby

-He’s very caring and will hold you anytime you need to be held

-He just wants to help people and make the world a little easier for them so he overworks himself to the max trying to keep everything in jackson in order

-”Tommy, it’s 3 am and you got rounds in the morning. Come to bed.”

-”Yeah i'll be in there in a minute, i just gotta figure out the food supply situation.”

-Having to drag his ass to bed

-He loves cuddling, he loves feeling close to you

- Your the fighter of the relationship, tommy doesn’t like to fight if he doesn’t have too so he lets you deal with the violent stuff

-Although tommy loves his brother, he has a hard time forgiving him for the violence he exposed him too

-He feels very undeserving of you and everything good in his life., you have to constantly reassure him that he is a good person and is doing a great job

-He does have nightmares of being in Boston but you were always there for him, he was so thankful for you.

-He loves your cooking, like it can be the most simple thing ever and he’d be like 

-”This is the best Cereal i have ever had, who taught you to cook like this?”

-He has mommy issues, like his mother wasn’t really around so he has a lot of issues with that ig

-He is the best kisser i said what i said

-He’s very passionate and possessive, it’s cute

-He gives you his jackets all the time, he thinks you look so cute in them

- This man is literally the softest i can’t

-He doesn’t cut his hair just because one time you told him you liked it long

-”Jeez honey, your hair is getting pretty long.”

-”Shoot, do I need to cut it again.”

-”No...I like it long, it flatters your face.”

-”I will literally never touch my hair again ever again now that you said that, Okay”

-You have expanded this mans music taste

-He only ever listened to country cause i mean he’s a simple man but then you came along

-You got him a walkman just so he can listen to the music you recommend him

-He tells ellie all about you and asks her for help because he doesn’t want to mess up anything

-He’s not good in relationships and he believes he’s not a very attractive man so he doesn’t really try but he sees himself marrying you

-Spoiler he asks you to marry him because he can’t see himself without you, he doesn’t want to imagine how the world would be so dark without you in it

-He’s not into cute nicknames so he’ll just call you honey

-After joel's death, he was broken and you didn’t think you can even put him back together, but your willing to try

Dina

-I think you would be dina’s first girlfriend but she would love you with all her heart 

-She kissed you at the dance and everything kinda clicked from there 

-She would sneak over to you house in the middle of the night 

-”Jesus, i could've killed you.”

-”But you didn’t silly, come on i’m cold lemme in.” 

-”You're gonna be the death of me dina.” 

-Your rounds with her were never boring, it was always an adventure with her 

-Making out behind building because she couldn’t wait till yall got home 

-This girl will tease you until your bright read in the face

-She will definitely love kissing you, like she will just randomly kiss you 

-She will try to smash you literally anywhere, when she’s wanting to do the nasty it doesn’t matter where you are she will pull you into a random room or bathroom

-She never bores you in bed too, she’s always up to do new things especially since your her first girlfriend 

-When she found out she was pregnant she wanted to give this child the best life so yall decided to move out into a farmhouse 

- Having a kid didn’t really change how she loves you

-She’s still crazy and wild but now she just has a kid on her hip

-You guys were co parents so you both would hunt and take care of JJ 

-You guys would do almost anything to make that kid laugh even if that was dancing like lunatics for an hour straight 

-You guys almost never get alone time so just laying in bed without the kid felt nice 

-Yall are cottagecore lesbians idc, yall are the best parents and i said what i said 

-From behind hugs and kisses, she will grab your hips and kiss your neck until you have no choice but to rip her clothes off 

-Vintage records and slow dancing with JJ 

-I feel like being in a relationship with dina feels like a vintage song about love 

-There's lots of dancing in this relationship because dina loves dancing 

-She’s always afraid that you will feel left out in the family though since your not JJs real parent but you always tell her you don’t mind and you love JJ just like how Jesse would 

-She finds it so hot when your all protective parent when it comes to JJ, as soon as he falls asleep mama yall wont get any sleep 

-Yall are the best parents, dina will fight anyone who hurts JJ and you make him feel loved 

-When he gets older you guys try to tell him about Jesse without making you seem like the outsider of the family if that makes sense 

-Taking care of the animals and plants as a family and reading books about how to while laying in bed 

-Dina makes the best food and she tries to teach you but it just doesn’t add up to what she does 

-Okay we don’t know much about her sister but by the picture we saw she looks hella cool and i think you would be like best friends with her 

Jesse 

- yall sleep on this man i swear, so this one is to all my jesse stans are there 

-He’s kinky, that’s all 

-He knows he’s hot and he’s super cocky about it 

-He’s not much of a cuddler ngl but he will fall asleep and wake up spooning you 

-Your really close to his mom, like she loves you so much 

-He’s very reckless and your kinda the opposite so you kinda tone him down abit so you think that’s why his mom likes you so much 

-Jesse isn’t much of a dancer and he doesn’t really listen to music but he does like to play video games 

-You always pick him up video games randomly and gets so excited 

-You force him to dance with you at dances and he’s so awkward about it 

-”I hate this.” 

-”Awe you love it.” 

-Always trying to grope you while dancing, like will have his hands on your ass and theres kids behind you like sir stoppp but like keep going 

-”Hey! watch those hands.” 

-”I have no idea what your talking about”

-You and dina are pretty good friends like even after their weird relationship, she’s happy for the both of you 

-Okay so let's pretend jesse didn’t die and he is alive and well 

-When he finds out dina is pregnant he freaks out, he’s still pretty young so he’s terrified he won’t be good enough 

-When the baby comes though he’s so excited, when he’s in the infirmary with dina your happy for him but you can’t help but feel an outsider 

-Dina is so sweet and tries to make you feel better 

-”You're gonna be the coolest step parent ever. I’m glad my son gets such a badass step mom damn.” 

-Dina does move out of jackson still though so yall only get JJ every other week, that was the agreement 

-He cooks in the morning for you and JJ while yall are laying in bed 

-I’m sorry but he’s literally the coolest dad, his entire life changes because of that kid 

-When JJ leaves to go over to his moms house Jesse won’t let you get out of bed, this mf hasn’t got any in a week

-He gets a bunch of cook books so he can better his ability to cook for little JJ 

-You guys decorate JJs room together and it’s the cutest thing ever 

-He takes you to romantic places in the abandon city when yall are on rounds together 

-Jesse has a lot of friends but he would much rather hang out with you 

-Yall call each other stupid and dumb a lot but it’s never used as an insult its just for fun 

-”Damn it, why do i always get the nasty ones.” 

-”Because your stupid, dummy.” 

-”That’s right, i forgot.” 

-Your guys bed is never made, you guys don’t even bother at this point. Like either the kid messes it up or you guys mess it up so what's the point 

-He picks you up when he hugs you, literally pick you up from the waist and lift you up 

!Credits to gif owners!

[muwur]

Since requests were open I was wondering if I could request father headcanons for iwai + ushi + atsumu 🥺 btw your writing is vv tasty n I can’t wait to see you write more !! Keep up the good work n stay safe !!

haikyuu daddee headcanons

✧ hc’s ✧ for iwaizumi, ushijima, and atsumu

❧ gn reader

✎ 1.4k words

a/n: omg u called my writing taSTY Dx i cri tySM 💞 that is a high compliment for me AHAHAHAH ILY and ty for the request! 

also my lovelies i m back i m sry i was gone so long feojfe i miss yall <3 here u go enjoi, this was fun to write lmk if yall want more characetrs AHAHA

current listen: accidentally in love by sHREK AAHAH jkjk i mean counting crows, they cant take that away from me by ella fitzgerald and louis armstrong, love the way you lie by eminem and rihanna

requests: open!

iwaizumi

✧ prePARED daddy

✧ picked up on this parenting thing p fast, also does a lot of research so he’s ready to face any situation

✧ teaches his kids how to behave n respect others

✧ also makes sure they know not to talk to strangers and teaches them some self defense

✧ be warned these kids are packing a surprise can of whOOP ASS,, dont fuck w them,, plus u wouldnt want buff daddee iwa on ur tail

✧ honestly his kids would be ANGELS ,,, n thats cuz he treats them all so w e l l

✧ mans is ATTENTIVE. he asks his kids about their days, their interests, and encourages discussion about their fEELINGS 🥺

✧ always offers them really valuable and light-hearted advice

✧ and gives them the love and transparency we all wanted but never had--

✧ however his kids are easily (n negatively) influenced esp when uncle oikawa comes to visit--

✧ but mostly bc iwa gets annoyed and slips out a lot of curse words and a “shittykawa” and then his kids started calling oikawa that and now it’s ingrained in them forever fjoefefgfvi (*distant phlattykawa crying noises*)

✧ gives them LOTS of head pats and ruffles as signs of affection

✧ PACKS THEIR SCHOOL LUNCHES and ensures they eat a balanced meal

✧ attends all their games/events,, will get a bit rowdy hype them up

✧ def lets his kids sleep with him when they’re having a bad night or woke up scared from a nightmare (and waits for them to fall asleep before going to sleep himself fojref)

✧ when they were babies he usually succeeded to get them to stop crying by pulling funny faces, showing them their favorite cartoons, or humming a lullaby

✧ when they get older,,, u bet iwa would be suPER protective esp when their kids start being iNtErEsTeD in other people

✧ you: “iwaizumi, they seem like a really nice kid, though”

✧ iwa: *sitting with you in the car, across the street from the ice cream parlor your child said they were at, and spying from the window* “you can’t trust everyone, of course they seem ‘nice,’ they just want our approval”

✧ definitely did not interrupt his child’s potential first kiss at their house’s doorstep by slamMINg the door open “sUDDENLY” cuz he “hEard TheIR vOicEs and THougHt TO lET them In”

✧ effectively traumatized both kids

✧ tho he felt bad after n u made him go apologize so he did (and he was forgiven, only if he agreed to never spy on them again--)

✧ doesn’t stop him from scrutinizing every person yalls kid introduces to you tho

✧ overall a super supportive dad, 11/10

ushijima

✧ ok dEF does not know much about parenting ,, at first

✧ stared at his child like ???nani when you both changed their first diaper

✧ also had plenty of staring contests with his babies ,,, called it bonding

✧ was curious and tasted baby food once,,, immediately regretted it

✧ once put a volleyball next to his child, who attempted to bite it, and took it as a sign that they liked it

✧ after sum time n practice, his mind becomes split between “how to volleyball” and “how to dad”

✧ catch him in the kitchen wearing an apron and whipping up his kids’ favorite smiley face pancakes 😤😤

✧ has an amazing ability to get his kids to stop crying, does really simple things like give them their favorite toy or place a gentle hand on their hand or attend to their needs (mans can tell if they want food or needa poop) and they calm down immediately

✧ carried them on his shoulders once and now they never stop asking him for shoulder rides (not that he minds anyway)

✧ if theres two kids he can probs carry one on each shoulder cuz cmon ,,, have u seen this man

✧ always goes to every performance/game/event his child takes part in

✧ man smiles so soft™ when he goes to the 1st grade play and sees his kid’s name in the program next to their role as “townsperson b” (next year, they upgraded to “singing carrot” in a play about the food pyramid)

✧ if his kid ends up enjoying volleyball, he will teach them e v e r y t h i n g they need to know

✧ but is overall super supportive of anything else his child pursues and doesn’t push anything onto them, would rather let them choose what they want to do

✧ had n o idea what to do when his kid asked him about the birds n the bees asfghkl

✧ couldnt sleep one night thinking about it and just randomly asks you while yall laying in bed in the dARk like “so our child asked me how babies are made and I told them they came from watermelon seeds” (you: 👁️👄👁️ “come again”)

✧ you: *at the grocery store with your child*

✧ child: *hands you watermelon* “I want a little brother!”

✧ you: “haha of course honey” 👁️👄👁️ what do i do (*later to ushijima* “duhfojhguf we needa get another baby i promised our child a younger brother fohurof” ; ushi: “wat” ; you: “itS YOUR FAULT”)

✧ yall eventually tell them not every watermelon can produce babies only really special ones that are really hard to get fhuoefkfotfi theyre not ready for the truth

✧ another great daddee, we stan

atsumu

✧ knew parenting was stressful esp with bABieS but was like eh it cant be that bad right

✧ think again

✧ g o o d b y e  s l e e p

✧ develops phat bags under his eyes, responds with a weak “aha im fine just that parenting life and the kids ykNOW” whenever his teammates ask if he’s oKAY

✧ tried to tempt his kids to eat their mush baby food by trying it himself, nearly gagged but was able to say “eughh yuMM”

✧ loves to lift them high up in the air, even throws them up a little and nearly drops them (yall almost died from feAR but babie was having so much fun,,, yall agreed to be just a bit more careful)

✧ rlly bad at getting them to stop crying, gets very stressed when he’s exhausted every option he can think of then calls you over for some help/advice (you: *immediately calms them down* ; ratsumu: “how--”)

✧ calls up osamu a lot to ask him how to make food ,, then simps whenever his twin brother comes over and the kids are in love with this man and his cooking (”dad why cant you make stuff as yummy as this”)

✧ very affectionate with his kids, gives them lots of hugs and kisses on the forehead

✧ plays with them a lot! whether it’s sports, just dance, animal crossing, or UNO, yOU NAME IT WE PLAY IT

✧ also has no mercy when playing competitive video or board games,, has made them cry more than once LOL

✧ so sometimes he toned it down n let them win,, until his kids actually got better and DEMOLISH him every time

✧ is cool with his kids cursing, just as long as they don’t do it in front of their teachers LMAO

✧ plays innocent when he gets a call from school saying his kid was using ‘inappropriate language’ and is like “whaaat? my child? im not even sure where they learned that, maybe check if the other kids in class are saying those things, too--”

✧ reminisces how much nicer his kids were to him when they were younger and all the time they spent together,,, bc now that they reached their tEeNS they want alone time

✧ wants to be B) cool dad so he tries kinda hard, esp in front of their friends but his kid’s just like dad pls dofjrgjigtgro

✧ also very supportive of whatever his kids want to pursue and dedicates time to help them in whatever ways he can (whether that be to help them practice, make sure he can provide transportation, get them supplies, etc)

✧ always playfully competing with you to see who’s the “better” parent (you win by default)

✧ PROTECTIVE dad and will easily intimidate ANYONE who crosses his kids

✧ takes sum adjustment and mental resilience but daddee atsumu perseveres  😤 absolutely loves his kids and would do anything for them  

[allpromarlo]

Ocs 👁👁 ? I would like to Hear them

OOOOOOOOOHHHHH BABY BUCKLE UP THIS BOUTTA BE A L O N G ONE

i'm only gonna get into the nba ocs that i have and not the like 27 other ones because issa BIG ass universe and i don't have the time nor space to talk about all of them in detail LMAO

the first one that i had was youngjae park (i created him during my kpop phase and i've gotten so used to the name that i'm not even gonna change it no more) who i had as a 7'1" athletic tANK on the blazers. kinda like nurk just a lot better and with a VERY weird homoerotic friendship with dame but that's beside the point LOL. he's the dude who went into isolation for four months and came back as super saiyan god mode korean jesus and averaged a quintuple double (dont question it.) and swept every award he was eligible for. he was drafted 16th overall in 2014 (at the age of 16 oops) by the blazers, won roty in 2015, dpoy in 2016 (my apologies kawhi) then had a terrible season in 2017 because of injures, still made the wcf with a mediocre blazers squad and missed the finals because of ONE (1) failed block on steph . then everybody was like TRADE THIS BUM I WANT HIM OFF MY TEAM but it was all sadeness when he went missing smh (hid in a small town in korea for dramatic effect because he's all about that camp shit) came back in 2018 opening night against the bulls (who dIDNT TRADE DROSE IN THIS UNIVERSE FAWK YALL) and from then on it was AAAAALLL downwards for the rest of the league. 2018 and 2019 were seasons in HELL for the warriors especially 2018 because he 112 pieced them on christmas in their own arena. threepeatdled with the blazers, got injured AGAIN in 2021 but dw he's coming for that revenge season in 2022. on his personality i'd say he walks the line between annoying and funny and does it in an exceptionally bisexual way because i said so . also he's very dramatic and probably mentally ill because a normal functioning person doesn't hibernate for almost half a damn year and then come back as a god

second one was actually youngjae's lil brother hyunjae (korean names are hard and there wasn't any other options man don't come for me) who is a whole foot shorter than his bro and plays as starting point on the spurs. he's a lot like ai in his play style but has a 3 pt shot that could beat stephs ass and was mvp in 2021. i also sacrificed giannis' championship season for him (oops sorry bout that) so him and the rest of the spurs (including keldon for better judgement) could be champions and san antonio has a legacy outside of tim duncan. ANYWAYS he doesn't have a dramatic ass backstory like youngjae but he did have a maniacal growth spurt in like two years (5'0 -> 6'1) and went from missing the playoffs without even making the play in to being a fourth seed champion in the league. he's a lot calmer and lowkey than his brother (because that bitch is BRASH but alas) and big men like pushing him around until they get the shit beaten outta them by cole grant (he's up soon). all in all he's very nice and also kinda annoying to the point that giannis intentionally pushed him in the finals lol but he has a good heart. 10/10 would recommend

next i have *checks notes* uuuuhhhh everett curtis (...) who's a 7'4" kinda lanky power forward that played in the 2000s. i always thought ai could've come further than he did if he had one other piece and everett is EXACTLY that piece except rett was actually drafted a year before ai did, 3rd overall in 1995. his career went pretty much normal, won an mvp in 00 (fuck u shaq) and a chip in 01 but after that was stuck on a somehwat mediocre sixers team outside of ai cause you know i had to do it to em. there was a whole lotta drama in the 2007 off season about him or ai potentially getting traded (kinda like the ben simmons shiii right now but more weighted) but in the end it resolved in a whole lotta nothing and rett actually re-entered his prime (?) in 2008 and won the chip with ai & melo on the team (melo has a whole autogenerated 2k career in this au but i don't have the time nor energy to get into that) anyways yeah rett eventually retired in 2015 after 20 years of the sixers (two years before ben simmons was drafted hooo lord he said i'ma save myself) and at age 39 and rn he's just kinda existing not doing a lot but he did write a book where he DOESN'T put his best teammate down relentlessly (feel yaself called scottie). as for his personality he's very laid back & calm and him and ai had a very...special bond, you may interpret that however you want LMFAO. overall a very chill dood and i wish him no harm even though i'll probably have to do it to him sorry bro

AAAAAAAAAND LAST UP the newest addition to the squad, cole grant. he was actually based off of this one dude my brother made in 2k (because his own character in mycareer was overpowered as FUCK and he wanted to make a realistic person) who was a 7'2" center with a giannis ass build who can't shoot a 3 for his life (that's what we have hyunjae for) and i put him on the spurs because hyunjae needs a friend. my dude was drafted into the nba at 23 in 2020 after a row of events that include him serving in the army because he didn't wanna pay for college but then realizing oh hell nah this ain't it and leaving. alas he's jacked as fuck now and has knocked a couple players out already (including jokic TWICE because he thought he could do sumn against his favorite little gremlin boy hyunjae) but when they leave his friends and him alone he's pretty chill. he's still underdeveloped because i just made him up like five days ago so if you want i can give more information on him later when i've developed him a lil further LOL. hwat i do know doe is that he and hyunjae have this typical "energetic small dude who's ready to fuck everything up" and "usually laid back big dude who can and will rock your shit if you hurt his friend" typa dynamic. is very funny 2 me indeed

sooooOOO that was it. that's the nba ocs that i have . again it's not all of my ocs because issa lOT of people but like i also have wnba, f1 and music ocs (the musicians root FAR back and are the start - the foundation of this entire universe of madness and unicorns) and i also altered reality to fit my agenda because reality can be whatever i want and it's GOING to be whatever i want

also thanks for asking me about them so now i can post about them on here because i've been Waiting to do that for a long time ily

[bxthharmon]

Never Go Home Again, Pt. XI || JJ Maybank x Reader

Words: 2910

Series Warnings: violence / talking about abuse / toxic relationships / talking about nudes sex and sex tapes / drugs / underage drinking

Pt. Warnings: Abuse / toxic relationships / talking about nudes, sex and sex tapes

Series Summary: A new girl, a shoebox of old memories, a past she’s trying to forget coincide with a hotheaded, but selfless, boy.  teenagers getting in way over their heads

Pt. Summary: JJ and Y/N reconcile upon her return

A/N: and yall are finally gonna learn the readers story lmao. im going to bed like, asap

Chapters linked in my masterlist.

“masterlist”

You’d known JJ for over a month, and you’d never been nervous to see him. You always felt comfortable, and sure, you felt fluttery when he kissed your cheek, flirted with you, put his arm over your shoulders, but you’d never felt like this. You fiddled with the friendship bracelet Kie had made you a week ago, and chewed on your lip as you sat on the porch of the Chateau. You could hear someone in the garden, but made no move to see who it was, stuck in stasis as you stressed. Your vision was cloudy. Everything he had said, it hurt. It hurt because it was true. You hadn’t been honest with him, with any of them, and they had welcomed you and helped you for weeks now. You needed to come clean. They deserved to know - JJ deserved to know - and it was unfair of you to keep it from them any longer.

It was all still fresh. It had been three months since the divorce was finalised. Two months since everything went down with Tyler. One month since you met JJ. You closed your eyes, psyching yourself up. Was John B home? Kie or Pope over? Was JJ even there, or was he home? You wondered, Please don’t let him have been home.

You heard an engine, and looked up. Pope’s car rolled up, and you stood, Kie popping the door open and pulling you into a close hug. She pulled away, eyes shining, “We didn’t know where you were - you weren’t answering calls and your dad only said you’d gone away.” she blinked slowly, opening her eyes again with a determined light.

“We thought you were dead.” you looked away from Kie, seeing Pope. You pulled him into a hug. “JJ’s been a mess. He stole 30 Gs off  a drug dealer.”

You smiled slightly, “I’m sorry for leaving like that. And I’m sorry for hiding everything. JJ was right, I haven’t been honest, and that’s not fair, you guys mean the world to me.”

Pope nodded, “You needed time, that’s okay. You’ll tell us when you’re ready.”

You thanked him. “Did JJ go home?”

“I think so.” Kie murmured, and you swore.

“I haven’t even been home yet.” 

There was a whirring behind you, and you all turned, the trees igniting in gold as a stupid amount of fairy lights lit up you small scene. You raised your eyebrows.

“What the hell?” asked Pope, the three of you in matching surprised expressions.

“Who the hell is that?” Kie questioned, leading you and Pope through the trees.

Lights illuminated the clearing outside the Chateau, gold and red shining brightly on the scene before you. A jacuzzi, lit with floating flamingo drink-holders, surrounded JJ, shirtless with a pair of stolen glasses. He held a champagne flute in one hand, and you heard the pop of a bottle opening. The three of you stood across from him.

You could see, plain as anything, he was at breaking point. The combination of the hunt, his dad, and you had unravelled him. I did this, a voice commanded, this was me.

“What did you do, JJ?” Pope asked, taking in the brilliantly lit display.

“I got a jet going straight in my butt right now.” he crooked the glasses, down, looking over the three of you with unfocussed eyes. “Y’all should get in immediately, you hear me?” he sloppily poured a drink “Salud!”

Your heart broke for him. His eyes fell on you, “Y/N?” he slurred, “Y/N! I thought you were-” hiccup, “-dead! You just, uh, you just disappeared.”

“I’m sorry.” you sighed.

“No - no!” he shook his head, voice too gleeful for his words, “I’m sorry!” he tipped his head back as he downed the champagne straight from the bottle.

“How much did this cost?” Pope interrupted.

“Uh… well, with the generator, the petrol, and oh, hey, express delivery…” he chuckled, “pretty much all of it, yeah.”

You kept your eyes on him, knowing that one too many questions would release a dam full of emotions he’d been hiding for years.

“All of it?” Pope stepped forwards.

“Yeah, all of it.” JJ repeated.

“You spent all the money in one day?”

“Pope,” you muttered, knowing JJ wouldn’t last.

“Yeah, burned a hole right through my pocket.” JJ confirmed, gesturing sloppily. “But, I mean, like, come on - guys - like, look at this! Finest in jet-based massage therapy, that’s what they told me!” Kie looked thoroughly unimpressed. “Kie, what? Can’t a man have a little luxury in life?” his voice was hoarse, and you felt worry building in your stomach and pounding at your head. He whipped his glasses off, “Come on, all this scrimpin’ and scrapin’...” his voice went soft, “I mean like - guys, we - you only live once, right? Enough of this emotional shit, get in the Cat’s Ass. Come on!”

“In the what?” you frowned.

“In the Cat’s Ass.” he shrugged, a small, drunk smirk playing at his lips, “That’s what I named her. Oh! Hey, yo, I almost forgot!” he switched a button, and the water lit up, a light flashing as the already bright display got weirder. He was about to break. “Yeah, that’s right, I now. Disco mode! That’s right, baby!”

“Are you kidding me?” Pope cut in, and you squeezed your eyes shut for a second, knowing that he and Kie were pulling at a tether that was seconds from coming loose. “You could have paid for restitution!”

“Or literally given it to any charity!” Kie added.

“Or better yet, you could have helped us buy supplies to get the rest of the gold out of the well!”

“Okay well you know what? I didn’t do that!” JJ burst forwards, showing a selection of purple bruises littering his torso. “I got a hot tub!” you kicked off your shoes, tears building at the thought that the person supposed to love him the most would hurt him like that, “For my friends. I got a hot tub for my friends. You know what? No, you know what? Screw friends. I got a hot tub for my family! I got this for you! Look, guys, look what I did for you! Alright? Look at this! Look at this! No, you stop being emotional. It’s fine, okay?” You stepped forwards as he continued, stepping over the walls of the tub and pulling him in, letting him cling to you. You let him sob on you. “I just couldn’t do it.” He was convulsing with sobs while you tried your best not to, knowing you had to be strong for him. You had to. “I couldn’t take him anymore! I was gonna kill him.” You felt Pope and Kie’s arms wrap around the pair of you, the lot of you wet with tears and hot tub water. “I just wanna do the right thing.”

“I know.” you murmured, stroking his hair and closing your eyes as you tried to keep your breathing steady.

Kie and Pope got out first, leaving after you told them you’d deal with him. You sat him down in the tub again, turning the jets off. You wiped away the last of his tears, gently prying the champagne away from him. You stroked his hair, letting him lean on your shoulder until his breathing returned to normal. You stood up then, helping him out of the tub and guiding him to the bathroom, where you sat him down on the closed toilet seat as you ran a hot bath. You distracted him by reminding him of your best memories since you met him, until the bath was full. You helped him in, washing the chlorine out of his hair, and letting him relax.

You sat on the edge of the tub as he blinked up at you, sobering up quickly. He lifted a hand from the water, touching your waist tentatively.

“Where did you go?” he whispered, the silence pressing down thickly.

“To see an old friend.” you hadn’t thought about your leaving for hours, and now you did, you wondered how broken he’d be when he found out you’d slept with two people while you were gone.

“You went to LA.” he muttered.

“Yeah.” you nodded slowly, touching his cheek, lightly. “I’m sorry.”

He blinked at you, confusion painted in his features. “Why?”

“I left.” you helped him stand up, guiding him out of the bath. You handed him the towel you’d found, leaving him to get him a change of clothes. You picked out a top and joggers, brushing away a stray tear before rejoining him. You turned around while he changed, then lay him down in the spare bed. You draped the blanket over him, changing quickly into the only other joggers you could find, and one of his tops. You lay down in front of him, taking in his bright, cobalt eyes and soft pink lips. 

“Why did you go?” he sounded broken. So broken.

“I felt trapped, like you would all hate me. So I went to see the people who I knew would be there for me, no matter what. Then I realised that, more than anyone, more than my friends in Cali, that was you guys.” he gazed at you, a strange look in his eyes as he processed your words.

“I shouldn’t have yelled.” he closed his eyes, and when he reopened them, there was a teary sheen to them.

“No.” you rejected his claim. “I needed it. I’ve been avoiding it, thinking that would make it all go away. It was stupid. If you hadn’t have yelled, I wouldn’t have gone. And if I hadn’t have gone, I’d have avoided it for the rest of my life.”

He let a tear slip. “I fucked up.” he murmured. “I fucked us up.”

“No. No, I did it. I wasn’t honest. I was so desperate not to repeat what had happened that I pushed you away.”

“What did happen?”

“Where do I start?”

“At the beginning.”

--

Your parents loved each other. They lit up when the other entered the room, and looked at each other like the world revolved around them. They met young, in highschool. Your mom was pregnant with your brother by senior year, and they got married when school was over. Three years later, once they had a house and two steady jobs, they had you. Highschool sweethearts, it always seemed perfect.

You were convinced they were perfect, until you were ten. They had a huge argument, so big, so loud, that the neighbours called the cops, and you and Lewis had to spend the night at friends’ houses. They never argued like that again.

You knew they loved each other, even after that. Over three years later, on the brink of your fourteenth birthday, you noticed they hardly spoke anymore. Family meals stopped, and they avoided each other at all costs. After a few weeks, you came home to a floor covered in glass and crockery, and your parents sitting across from each other crying. Things were perfect for two more years.

Then, she started getting angry. She threw things, hit things, broke things. She took out all of her frustrations on the family, never caring to explain herself.

Your mom lost her job, but was still out all day, everyday. You saw her with another man three months after. When you saw her, you understood something. 

Your mom hated her life. She hated not being able to afford things, not being able to go on holiday, not being able to treat herself. She wanted to live a life more glamorous than what your father could give her. You hated her for it.

You asked her about it the next day.

Your brother and dad got home to see her things packed, and you sitting at the kitchen table, bruises around your neck and a cut over your right eyebrow. The divorce papers arrived within a week. 

She didn’t fight for custody. She didn’t call. She didn’t try to see you.

--

JJ nodded slowly, wiping your tears away with the pad of his thumb. “She’s been calling you.” he murmured.

“She feels bad.” you shrugged, “I had a go at her, she hasn’t called since.”

“Did you see her while you were in LA?” 

“No, she lives in Brentwood, I didn’t want to waste my time there.”

“Fuck her.”

“Yeah.” you smiled, “Fuck her.”

“Y/N?” he whispered, “Thanks for telling me that.”

“Your welcome.” You shrugged.

“Who’s Tyler?”

“My ex.” 

“What did he do to you?”

You searched his eyes, knowing you had to tell him. You took a deep breath.

--

You met Tyler in middle school. He was the tallest in the class by an inch and a half, and the best looking. You were best friends with Cassie, and Cassie’s parents knew his parents, so you were friends by association. You cruised through middle school, skating with him and his friends when you weren’t at school or hanging out with Cassie.

At some point in Freshman year of high school, his friends stopped joining your skating days, and you and Tyler got close. He asked you out near the end of the year, and you said yes. You spent your summer drinking and smoking with Cassie or skating with Tyler, losing your virginity to him just before the start of your sophomore year. You went steadily for a year, letting your relationship become more and more toxic, until he would throw fits if you so much as spoke to another guy. You lost your friends as he tightened his grip around you, keeping you close with threats and bribes. 

He was the only one who was there for you when your mom started cheating, because he was the only one you talked to. You let yourself be vulnerable, and he took advantage of it. You went out with Cassie just before that night with your mom, telling her about your failing relationship and breaking family. She was the one who told you to break up with him. 

You waited three days. 

He took it well. Nodded, didn’t cry, left quickly.

The next day, your life was hell. You got pulled from English by the police, and taken to the principal's office, and sat down. He told you that a load of photos and two videos had been leaked from an anonymous account. Nudes, two sex tapes. You didn’t even know the videos existed. It was all over Instagram, and even a couple of porn sites. 

You didn’t even know. Not until that moment. No one mentioned it, they just gave you funny looks. It all made sense. Your dad came in, they explained it all to him. They traced it to Tyler’s phone, and your dad chose to press charges.

You saw Tyler a couple of times, in huge, explosive fights outside his house. The case was days away from success, days from him being sued, an agreement saying he’d never be able to share them. Then, your mom came back. It had been almost a month, but she came back, taking almost every penny your dad owned.

Unable to afford the lawyer as well as the moving fees, the case fell through. You only found out about the move the next day, talks of it having been circulating for a few weeks. You had three days, and in those days, all of your friends fell out with you, deciding you had chosen to hide it, not believing that you hadn’t known. Your only ally was Cassie. 

You moved, and then, you met JJ.

--

JJ’s eyes were glittering, shining, with fury. He was hurt at the idea that someone would hurt you like that. He wanted to hit something, but given your vulnerable state, tried to remain calm. You nestled into him, breathing sporadic as you processed the fact that you had said it out loud. He ran his hand over the bare skin under your borrowed top, an act of comfort that spoke the thousands of words he didn’t know how to say. The air felt thick with tragedy, hanging over the pair of you like a suffocating blanket. 

The night was raw, painful. Wounds that were hardly healed were torn open, twice as big, exposed, hurtful. Both of you, teenagers who’d been through more than any teenager should have, hurting. You didn’t move for a long time, the comfortable silence consuming you. His breathing was slow, resting. He slipped into a well-deserved slumber, as you listened to his heartbeat. You realised that you felt something for him. You’d never felt it before, not even with Tyler. You felt your heart swell when you thought about him, and contract painfully when you thought about his hurt. You decided you would protect the boy until the day you died, because God knows he needed it. 

Always the protector, helper, giver. He deserved to be protected. He deserved more than what he had, more than you could offer, but it didn’t matter, because as long as you were able to, you’d try and be what he needed, deserved, wanted. It came out as a whisper, breaking the long, peaceful silence. Rough and straightforward, plain and forward, but full of meaning. Full of the emotions you’d hidden from him, the thoughts that plagued you at night, the words you’d tried to push down for weeks now.

“I love you.”

Tags: @tangledinsparkles​ @jellyfishbeansontoast​ @lolitstiana​ @ilikealotofpeople-younotsomuch​ @teamnick​ @thoughtsofthestars​ @obxmxybxnk​ @jjmaybankswife​ @kaelyn-lobrutto24​ @sxcretinhuman​ @alexa-playafricabytoto​ @angvelics​ @badwolf00593​ @coloradogirl07​ @mendesmaybank​ @jiaraendgame​ @5am-cigarette​ @emerald-xcd​ @haharudy

[ally-writes-many-things]

You Got It Wrong (Matt Casey) Part 2.

Summary: After Y/N and Matt get into an argument, she leaves for her sister's wedding.

Words: 1293

Requested:

Prompts:

A/N or Warning: can you guys like comment more? Love the support but would love yall more if yall commented lmao. I'm tired and I dont care about going through it and fixing the grammar and spelling. So I'm sorry for that!

Tags: Tags: @intergalxtic @babyfannii @corebore123 @halsteadsway @bethii1 @littlemaatta @disneyismyworldforever @nhcwdw

Since your punishment, you barely talked to Casey or Herrmann unless it was Fire related or a job related which sucked but you were mad at them still. You were mopping the floor in the break room when you saw Casey walking towards you. You made no eye contact as he walked up to you. "Y/N, how long is this gonna go on?"

"I don't know what you mean Lieutenant? I have still two weeks of chores. Your punishment,"

Casey sighed and shook his head. "Not what I meant," and walked off.

"What's going on here? Why are you doing chores, is this the rookie's job?"

You looked up at Ritter. "Yep, but since I didn't answer the radio on during the apartment fire, Casey and Herrmann have me on chores duty for the next two weeks,"

"That's why theres tension between you and Casey. I just thought it was sexual,"

You playfully shoved him. "RITTER!"

He laughed and walked off. "You know it's true,"

"It isn't but okay,"

---

You were outside washing the truck and laughing with Gallo when Casey walked up to you two. "What's so funny?"

You stopped smiling and looked away from him. "Nothing, Lieutenant,"

Casey looked over at you and then at Gallo. "Gallo, can you leave me and Y/N alone?"

Gallo nodded and dropped the rag in the bucket and walked inside. "Y/N, stop cleaning and talk to me,"

"You can talk to me while I'm doing this because I have to get this done,"

"Drop the rag and look at me, that's an order,"

You turned around and threw the rag in th bucket. "Yes, sir,"

Casey looked at you. "You got to stop this,"

"Stop what?"

"You're giving me grief over punishing you. I'm your superior,"

You just stood there. "I'm not giving you grief, Casey and exactly. You're my superior and I'm treating you as such,"

"No, you're not-"

"Okay then Casey. Tell me how to behave or what to say because obiviously, I can't do shit right according too,"

You started to walk off. "If you don't drop the additude, I will add more weeks,"

"Yeah, well, what's stopping you?"

MATT'S POV

Matt stood there watching her walk inside the firehouse as he sighed. This girl was doing to drive him insane. He didn't know what to do or say around you anymore without you blowing up on him. He walked into the firehouse and went to the common area and sat next to Mouch. He groaned and rubbed his face. "What going with you?"

"Women,"

Mouch laughed. "Don't think age stops those problems cause they don't,"

-

The day went on but Casey didn't see you. He walked up to Gallo and Ritter. "Have you seen Y/L/N?"

Ritter and Gallo both looked at each other and then to Casey. "Ask Boden,"

Casey was a bit confused as to that answer but he nodded and walked towards Boden's office and knocked on the office door. "Come in,"

"Have you seen Y/N?"

He nodded. "Not since she requested a transfer this morning,"

"Wait what?"

"She said that since she couldn't seem to do anything right here, she wanted to try another firehouse and after talking to her for an hour,"

"This is my fault,"

"What do you mean?"

"Well Herrmann and I put her on two week chore duty for not repsonding to us durnig the apartment fire and then right before she came to you, we got into an arugment and I made her feel like that. Like she can't do anything right. I got to fix this,"

Casey pulled out his phone and started to call you. "Calling her won't do anything good. She's driving to Michigian for her sister's wedding and she turned off her phone,"

"I thought that wasn't for another few weeks,"

"Well, they changed it, its on Sunday,"

"That's still like a week away?"

"I told her to take the week off to think about if she really wants to transfer,"

"I know this is short notice but can I have the week off or at least a few dats and I will try to have convince her not to transfer,"

"She one of the best firefighters we got. I dont want to lose her to another house. Take as much time as needed. I'll call you if we need you,"

Y/N's POV:

You sighed as you parked in your paren'ts driveway and you just sat there, wishing this was going to go different but you know what was going to happened the moment you stepped into that house. You turned on your phone and it started buzzing as you missed a lot of texts and calls. Mainly from Casey but you ingored those and went to yours, Gallo's and Ritter's text.

Gallo: Seriously? Why'd you turn off your phone.

Ritter: How would we know if you die or not?

Ritter: Turn on your phone already?

*3 hours later*

Gallo: Its been three hours, Ritter. She hasn't answered. I think its time to call a search party.

Ritter: I think so too.

You chuckled and replied to them.

You: I just pulled into my parents' driveway. I'm alive and fine.

Ritter: See, Gallo? I told you not to worry.

You rolled your eyes and looked up and saw your dad looking out the window. You sighed and decided that it was time for you to go see your family. You put your phone in your purse and walked into the house. You eldest brother walked up to you and gave you a bear hug. "We were wondering when you were coming into the house, you were park in the driveway for hours,"

You moved your arm to hug him back. "Yeah, well I had turned off my phone while driving and I was repsonding to my friends that thought I was dead or had been in a serious accident,"

After getting hugged by you older borther and your dad, you noticed that your mom wasnt in there. "Where's mom?"

"She's doing a errand, she will be back soon. Sit. Sit. Tell us. How is it living in Chicago? Those fires keeping you so busy that you can't come and visit us more often?"

You looked at your dad. "Yeah, pretty much. I'm surprised my boss let me get a week off."

What I really wanted to say was; "No. Mom is the reason I stay away. I cant handle her nagging me all the time,"

"So do we know who the lucky guy that is marrying our baby sister yet?"

They all shook their heads no. Your sister had kept this relationship a secret for a year before telling us that she was in it, even then she has kept who it was a secret as well. We at frist were worried it was someone that was really bad for her but she was a good girl who knew how not to get in trouble. "Not yet, we are suppose to meet him tomorrow,"

---

It had been about four hours since you gotten home, your mom came home about an hour after you got here and as you expected started on you about your love life but thankfully your eldest brother came to your defense and got her off your back. You were going to stay at a hotel but your parents have convinced you to stay at the house. You were walking towards your car and saw a car pulling up. You immdietely knew whose car it was and you walked up there, confused, as the door opened. "What are you doing here?"

Casey walked out of the car and looked at you. "Trying to convince you to stay with 51,"

[leverage-ot3]

notable moments from The Bottle Job

leverage 2.11

Parker: So this is paying respects, hmm?

Nate: Oh, absolutely, yeah. I mean, it's an Irish wake

parker likes learning about people things and I’m so proud of her for that

- - - - -

eliot is wearing a leather jacket, hoodie, AND a flannel,,, we see you

- - - - -

Eliot: Whoo. Redheads burn the hottest, don't they?

Nate: Easy. She's like my niece.

Eliot: She's not like your daughter, though.

Nate: Yeah. Like my niece. So, I don't want you to like my niece ‘cause she's like my niece.

Eliot: I don't like your niece.

Nate: No, but you know what I mean.

eliot SETTLE DOWN lmao

also what does it mean that I’m attracted to everyone eliot is attracted to in the show ??? that we have the same taste ???

- - - - -

we love it when the ot3 is framed together in scenes

- - - - -

Hardison: That's what sucks about the credit crunch. Honest people can't get loans, sharks move in, 12 points on the interest every month. There's no way to get out from under that.

- - - - -

Eliot: I don't care. You don't collect debts at a wake. You just don't do it. Want me to go downstairs, break this guy's knees?

- - - - -

can someone also make a compilation of smooth pickpockets/handoffs between the team because DAMN they are slick

- - - - -

Doyle: Mark Doyle, loan shark. If I were ashamed, I couldn't do my job, could I? I provide a service for people with no recourse, help those with nowhere else to turn. Society needs me.

Tara: Right, but isn't it, um, illegal?

Doyle: As me Da says, we pick up where the law leaves off.

[Leverage HQ]

(Hardison turns to give an incredulous look to Nate)

- - - - -

Hardison: Look, man, it is 9:00pm on a Friday night. All the banks are closed.

Parker: ATMs.

Hardison: Daily withdrawal limits. If y'all want me to do an electronic wire transfer of 100 grand between the Caymans and Madagascar, I can do that. If you're talking cash, you're out of luck. I'm sorry. Welcome to the future.

Eliot: Just use your little slimmer thing, man, and gank the ATMs.

Hardison: It's called a skimmer, but thank you for trying. And, no, I don't have that thing anymore. We're the good guys now. I haven't used that thing in months.

Parker: Months?

Hardison: Yeah.

Eliot: We've been the good guys longer than that.

Hardison: Well, we had a break.

parker and eliot be like: 👀

- - - - -

Hardison: Emergency fund.

(Eliot and Parker just look at him for a moment, then all three scramble. Eliot pushes over a chair and cuts open the bottom of it. Parker pulls several cereal boxes from the cupboard and dumps them out on the counter. Hardison takes the painting of Nate from the wall. Parker picks up several bundles of cash from among the cereal. Hardison carefully cuts the backing of the painting)

Parker: Whoa! What are you doing?

Hardison: Oh, what, you thought I kept Old Nate around for sentimental reasons?

Parker: Yes.

Hardison: Nah.

(Hardison peals back the paper and pulls out several bundles of cash that he hands to Eliot, who has his own money from the bottom of the chair)

I love to see how their minds work and how they would each hide their money

- - - - -

(Hardison cuts into the wood at the back of the bookshelves and pulls away the wood, exposing wires which he pulls out)

Hardison: Here. This is the cable to the television in the bar downstairs.

(Parker pulls the wires across the room)

Hardison: Nate, we're ready down here. I'm about to splice, well, everything.

okay but WHY is he wearing that full-face helmet ???

- - - - -

Doyle: What's your name?

Nate: Name's Jimmy. Yeah, Jimmy Ford.

- - - - -

(Liam and Liam’s brother are playing darts when Eliot walks up, laughing)

Liam: What's your problem?

Eliot: You remind me of my sister. (throws a dart without looking and hits the center of the target) Yeah, it's all in the wrist. (to Cora) Hey, how are ya? Good to see ya. Can I buy a couple of beers for my boys and one for me if you don't mind. We're gonna play a little darts here.

Liam: Do that again.

Eliot: All right. (hits center of board without looking) I'll show ya how to do that.

Liam: Yeah

eliot is so talented + that lil brow raise I love it

- - - - -

Tara: And I'm close to decoding this ledger.

Parker: Names?

Tara: And alphanumeric substitutions.

Parker: You know how to read that?

Tara: Yeah. I trained in cryptog... Never mind.

- - - - -

Hardison: Whoo! Yeah, baby. Yeah. That's what I'm talking about right there. Yeah.

Tara: I didn't realize you were quite that into basketball.

Hardison: Ba-basketball? Woman, we just pulled off the wire in the time it takes to get a pizza delivered. This is a big win. Big. They're gonna talk about this one.

he’s baby but also HELL YEAH

- - - - -

hardison taking his shirt off to change into more professional clothes? we love to be reminded of how JACKED aldis really is

- - - - -

Parker: What if I can't crack his safe?

(Eliot and Nate look at her, she smirks)

Parker: Seriously? C'mon

she make joke 🥰

- - - - -

Eliot: Led us to a warehouse. We're in now.

(Eliot and Parker climb through stock in a warehouse)

Hardison: What, I'm sorry. Led you? Led you to the warehouse?

[Leverage HQ]

Hardison: I had two cell phones and two minutes. Do you know else can do what I do? CIA, MI-6 and me.

- - - - -

Nate: What's the ETA on the cash?

Eliot: We're at the safe.

[Warehouse]

Eliot: Parker wants to take it out for dinner and drinks first.

Parker: This is a Glen-Reeder Prestige from the 20's. So many memories.

Nate: Tell her to pick it up.

Eliot: Come on, Parker.

Parker: I would move a lot faster, if you weren't stomping around.

Eliot: Shh. It's not me stomping. I don't stomp.

(Eliot moves to the door and peeks out, then exits the room)

this marriedness

- - - - -

on today’s edition of eliot using non-weapons-as-weapons, he used half of one of the goon’s wood piece to beat him up

- - - - -

Eliot: Hey. Come here.

(the third man runs away and Eliot throws the pole after him. In the office, Parker hums to the safe until Eliot follows the third man into the room)

Parker: Huh?

(the man swings at Eliot, but Eliot punches him in the face. Parker continues to try and crack the safe as Eliot grabs the man’s head and drives it down onto a desk)

Parker: Would you...! I can't hear a thing.

(the man swings at Eliot who dodges the blow and grabs the man in a head lock. Parker kicks the man in the head, knocking him out)

Eliot: I had it.

Parker: I am trying to work here.

Eliot: Well, hurry up.

(Parker opens the safe and takes out the money)

parker was singing to herself unlocking the safe

also she’s a badass motherfucker that can knock a guy out with one kick

- - - - -

parker being VERY reluctant to give the money back? that checks out

- - - - -

parker makes sure to meet eyes with hardison before they take their shots. pre-ot3/pardison vibes in season TWO

- - - - -

holy SHIT when tara was saying goodbye to cora and cora was thanking her she TOTALLY checked tara out a tiny bit. y’all. YALL. it was like a tiny boob acknowledgement. like, I swear it was there okay?

[pentyler]

Penny Tyler Intro

BASICS

★ BIRTH DATE / 1 December, 1955 (i think LMAO) ★ BLOOD STATUS / Half-blood ★ PRONOUNS & IDENTITY / she/her; cis female ★ FACECLAIM / Tristin Mays

ACADEMICS & ROOMING

★ PRIMARY SCHOOL / London School of Witchcraft, class of 1974 ★ ACADEMIC PURSUITS / Pre-Auror ★ HOUSE & YEAR / Gryffindor, class of 77

( alcohol abuse cw, abuse cw )

POINTS OF INTEREST

★ Penelope was happy being poor, alone, and without any ounce of weight to her name. She was alright with being “Penny Tyler” the girl with a muggle father who left when she was six, a borderline alcoholic witch for a mother who tried her best to give Penny everything she needed to be successful in life, and one or two friends at London School who were there when she needed them, but never suffocated her. She was okay being the girl that no one knew existed, or cared about if they did. In fact, she almost loved that fact. She didn’t have to talk in class, she didn’t need to act like a good friend or pretend that she cared about other people. Everything seemed, for once, to be going alright. Then, of course, her mom fell in love (or so she claimed).

★ Augustine Nott came from a long line of pureblood wizards, and with that came a lot of gold and a big reputation, one that her mother was more than happy to become a part of. Parties every weekend and fancy gifts delivered to their dilapidated doorstep; those were the things that Mrs. Tyler lived for, and suddenly they were all hers. The wedding was fast, unexpected, and huge -- married in June of 1974. The gossip that followed it was even bigger. Penny’s mother was nothing to the pureblood family that Augustine came from; she was trash, and by association so was Penny. Nevermind that she didn’t want to live in his lavish house with his House Elf and seven bedrooms and four and a half baths. She was her mother’s daughter, and she was going to be known for it. She had a name to uphold now, there were people (her peers) that she had to socialize with and parties she had to attend, and no matter how much she wished that going to Hogwarts for her 1st year would change that, she found out it only got worse.  

★ Silas Nott entered the world at only 6lbs 6oz a year after the wedding. Yet the tiniest of things, make the largest impacts. The maddening part about it all was, Penny never wanted any part of it, yet it was clear, when it came to her new baby brother, she was the person who cared the most. And being away at Hogwarts, away from him, and knowing the care that he was in (trust her, she’d grown up with Vera Tyler as a mother herself), only added to the stress. It led to outbursts in lessons, physical altercations with other students in the corridors, and a foul mouth on the quidditch pitch. Penny was kicked from the quidditch team -- one she even captained as a Seeker. But that was the only consequence she ever faced among all the incidents in her years at Hogwarts. She hated the privilege her name brought, but at least she didn’t have to kiss away her dreams of being an Auror. Penny’s currently in her last year of the Auror Academy. And while her dreams are soon to come true, she has more goals now. In her heart, she knows the influence Silas was under could forever change him. Her endgame was to have custody of him. No matter what it took.

★ It was undeniable that Penny took after her mother, the way she fell quick, hard, and deep for a wizard. Ten years her senior, Andrew Porter worked tirelessly as a well trained Hit Wizard. They’d met as soon as Penny entered the academy. It even being on her very first day had her thinking, perhaps fate did exist, and they weren’t all aimlessly wandering about. They were engaged only three months later, with a rushed wedding following everything else. But to Penny, this wasn’t rushing. This was love and why would she wait for love? But this romance was a whirlwind for a reason. The first year -- marital bliss. Nothing but surprise dates, apartment shopping, and they even got a dog together. The second year, things began to fizzle out. But, that’s what Penny had expected. That’s what she’d been taught her whole life, watching her mother go through men. The excitement wore off as you entered the “normal stage”. But what about arguing every week, sleeping in different beds, and deciding to work overtime was normal?

★ She’d learned he’d lied about a few things since meeting -- all to make himself seem... superior. Did this man have a God complex? Was this relationship only feeding his ego? At times, it’s all it felt like, when she wasn’t being made to feel crazy. There was nothing but a sense of false security and though Penny did not quit a thing in her life, she had to escape. This was not setting any better example for Silas, after all. And wasn’t her baby brother the priority in her life? Penny had wasted so much of herself admiring this man, for nothing in return. He hadn’t helped build up Penny’s self-love, not once, and it was as soon as she realized that, did she file for divorce finally. This was in November of 1979 and while the divorce isn’t yet finalized, Penny is out of their house and has avoided all contact with him since. Recently, she’s couch surfing with her dog as she searches for a new place to live and trying to find a sense of purpose again.

TRAITS

✓ athletic; independent; adventurous  ✗ bitter; aloof; quick-tempered

EXTRA FUN STUFFS

whale HELLO! this is the love of my life penny tyler, comin’ atcha with a fresh face and backstory!!! i wanted an old character to connect with all da older bbs ~ so everyone come at me, but definitely da “older” crew!!

her about page & pinterest

is a few months away from becoming an official auror! so we will soon be responding to all the fuckin war crimes that yall be committing in this universe DLKFALKJLSKDF;J hit us up if you ever need anything auror related! 

penny is definitely ACAB but you gotta fight the system from the inside!!! she also has this antiquated dream that she is going to “save the world one day”

grew up rather poor and doesnt take shit for granted much because of it

she can be a bit Intense or Abrasive so i APOLOGIZE in advance! i do not support physical violence but ms penny says what u gonna do about it punk !! maybe it’s cuz she’s a sag idk dont perceive us basically

she also has attended a lot of pureblood events and parties since her mum got married in ‘74. so!!! connections there too >: )

has currently been couch surfing since her divorce! so if you’re one of those couches, hmu :)

is craaaaazzzzyyyyyy about music!!! has a vinyl collection thats p much her pride and joy and what most of her money has gone into over the years

picked the “ugliest” dog at the shelter and made it hers!!! her name is blair lol

okay i think i got what i needed to out but yeah!! IM HYPE YEET

[youngbugandtonystank]

You're every fandom's dream! Your blog is like paradise. I know you don't ship spideychelle and parkner *i wish u did* but can you give us a list of your OTPs and NOTPs? and explain why you like them? and why not?

Hi♥ 

Thank you, sweetheart

Do you mind if I add BROTPs?

OTP’s:

Peterliz: I just love how they are their own personalities and still can like each other in the adorable way they do? Liz is exactly like Laura described her, a girl not motivated by the boy but willing to fall for him. I think it’s neat and fresh (Laura said Liz isn't your typical surface-level Mary Jane. You know, the damsel in distress (war flashbacks to Kirsten Dunst’s MJ). She’s actually super smart, she’s a valedictorian, she does the academic decathlon, she’s on every committee. She’s the most driven, Type A person in school, but she’s also kind) and Peter can identify with this as well, given that the boy can potentially be the smartest person in the room if he wants to. Peter thinks highly of her (She’s the best. She’s awesome. I just... I really want to tell her, but it’s kind of weird, you know? “Hey, I’m... I’m Spider-Man”) and cares about her achievements (Wow, you really... This is really important to you) and Liz knows him (you don’t need to study. You’re, like, the smartest guy I’ve ever met) and knows something’s going on with him but respects that (’I want to be mad, but I’m more worried’ ‘You’re terrible at keeping secrets’) And I think some people misinterpret Liz’s actions with Peter because they desperately want her to be the mean popular girl and that’s not it. Reading the novel, I think some people would get the insight behind Liz’s actions. She likes Peter a LOT but he’s always blowing people off because of his alter-ego Spider-Man. There’s a part where Liz mentions how Peter is always busy and she always gets disappointed about it. This hurts them both because Liz wishes Peter could give himself a rest and stop carrying the world on his shoulders and Peter wishes he could be normal and be with her. It’s the angst, this is what drives me lmao 

Fosterson: They’re going to be forever in my heart. The most unproblematic ship ever. It’s adorable how much they push each other to be better. Thor pushes Jane to do things she’s never done before and she pushes him to consider things he’s never done before. It’s a balance. I love that about ships, when they help each other grow.

AntWasp: The most supportive loving partners ever. I LOVE THEM.

Taser Tricks: Yeah, I know. They’ve never met but I ship them lmao. I think that if they finally interact in Love & Thunder, we’ll see if they match or not. Darcy’s bubbly personality could potentially contrast with Loki’s aloof one. It’s an interesting dynamic. This ship’s been around for years, I can’t believe we’re finally going to see them interact and with Waititi’s writing. Chef kiss.

Interwebs: I’m sorry but how come almost no one ships these two? ‘As long as you’re safe’ OMG like, how? They would be the softest boyfriends ever. Peter cares so so so much about Ned. Like, after May and Tony, comes Ned for Peter. Ned is his pillar and the person who grounds Peter. His biggest supporter. THEY'RE NEAT.

PalmerStrange: He changed and she walked away exactly because of this. Because Strange needed to be his own person first, and then he can go after her. She’s successful in her own harmony, is not scared to call him on his bs, she can see right through him. He listens to her, he respects her, and sees a partner on equal grounds. They’re fresh out of the oven. 

Ironstrange: Man, I’m sorry. It’s the chemistry for me lmao. They’re not my biggest OTP but I’m definitely up for them.

Carolmaria: Wives raising their adorable daughter♥ ‘Higher, further, faster, baby’ ‘you were the most powerful person I knew’

NOTP’s:

ScarletVision: I just don’t like them lol I respect the shippers but I don’t like the ship. I think Wanda needed more time to figure out her powers, her own identity. And Vision too. They both needed time and got caught up in everything else. 

Staron: This one doesn’t need an explanation. In this house we love and respect Sharon Carter. 

Brucenat: I’m sorry but lmao. I don’t think they have chemistry, and again, nothing against the shippers, but I kinda don’t like it when they give Natasha a different love interest in every movie. It’s like they tease a ship with a different avenger only because she’s the only woman in the group. I don’t dig it. 

Parkner: Nothing against them but I see them as Tony’s kids and it’s kinda weird for me to ship them if they’re like siblings and stuff. Apart from the fact that I can only picture Harley as a little kid, I don’t know why. Maybe because I see a lot of Tony in Peter, I feel like their dynamic would be like Tony & Harley in IM3. Harley asking thousands of questions while Peter ignores them just like Ned’s questions about spiders in HOCO lmao. They could be like brothers.

Spideychelle: Nothing against their shippers but I just don’t like them. I feel like this was rushed for fanservice, and I don’t see any chemistry between them. I think they would’ve been amazing bffs tho. Also, the fact that many only ship them because of tomdaya makes me uncomfortable. Don’t ship real-life people.

Look, I can respect the ships in the comics where Peter is an adult, it’s an alternate universe, that’s a different Peter Parker; a complete opposite but MCU Peter is a minor and I’m watching yall. You people ship Peter with everything that moves.

Anything with MCU!Steve on it.

BROTP’s:

Maria & Nick: Partners in crime? Biggest brotp ever. She’s always going to cover his back. He’s always going to protect her from everything. She’s the one person he trusts the most in the world, you can see that.  

Sciencebros 2.0: SHURI AND PETER WOULD BE BEST FRIENDS♥

Tony & Darcy: There was a time, waaay before Peter, where people used to see Darcy as Tony’s daughter in the fanon world. I was one of them lmao. I think they could be a fantastic brotp now. 

Rhodey & Pepper: Basically every member of the ironfam lmao

Happy & Peter, Peter & Rhodey, Rhodey & Happy, etc.

[broodsys]

so. just like - updates, overview, mood, what im trying to deal with, lowkey venting

ending week 7 of school (out of 10) and im so glad that both classes are rly laid back bc i am struggling sfm with everything lately. and i mean, spanish is still challenging bc its a whole different language, but it’s a very familiar challenging and the prof, for all her faults, is a soft grader which i appreciate.

im a lot calmer about the kitten situation bc even tho (stray) momma cat had five kittens this time, good!neighbors helped last year and have been involved with me thru momma cat ever since, and im a lot more familiar with what to do. for instance, i didnt panic and temporarily steal all her babies at fair injury to myself only to research, see that they should be with their mom at this age, confirm it with the vet, then let them go right back outside lmao. instead im just leaving them with her but beginning to interact with them. and im sure the neighbors socialize them, too - after all, they’re mostly on/under their deck and who wouldn’t want to play with tiny kittens?

and yall, they’re so fucking cute im ;;;;;; one gray, one pure black, one tuxedo like its mom, and two tortoiseshells, one with a black splotch right on the middle of its face and nose ;o;

and in less fun but still good-ish news, i think i got the one concession that since alcohol has become such a big trigger of mine, if my brother is going to drink he has to be kinda subtle about it, ie no beer cans left in the sink for me to wake up to and feel like ive been punched in the gut literally first thing in the morning (:

actually bc ive been so triggered by that (it’s been going on for like 4 days as of yesterday) i had a Ton of anxious energy and, in part bc ive been needing to anyway, rearranged my room p significantly. but now im on my desktop at my actual desk instead of trying to work on, literally, a folding tv dinner tray. but my 10g aquarium was on my desk and its a pain to move - still, it was one of those rearrangement sessions where after u move one thing u see how another thing should be moved, and it all works out really well. the new location for the 10g is so close that i was able to slide it over and have it rest at one point on both surfaces

im still exhausted and still fighting so many different things, health, stress, etc. - but i have my root canal appointment on monday (finally!) and while, like, the tooth is already dead and a drainage point has developed naturally, both of which mean im not in pain, its still an ongoing infection and that’s Not Great for anyone and esp for my immunocompromised ass. so, yeah, looking forward to that. also bc it’s a complicated root canal job (my root splits midway and has two ends, and it’s one of my front teeth! even tho it’s a pain, neat) i need to see an actual endodontist, but im honestly p excited abt that bc endo is my personal favorite dental specialty and it’s so cool. i love watching them work? even when they’re working on me?

im gonna run my name & gender change forms done to the courthouse this upcoming week, and im rly excited! and nervous! i don’t think i have much cause to be, like i think it’ll go thru without a hitch, but official paperwork of any stripe makes me hella nervous

but also i have been... rly relieving my past a Lot lately. some of u may’ve seen me mention this in now deleted posts but just, yeah, i think everything that’s going on just stirred up all my old traumas and i cant rly ignore it anymore, so im thinking abt getting a therapist of some kind, more just to have someone external to the family and not, yknow, tumblr to talk to abt all this. even dug out my DBT handbook, which should say a Lot abt my state of mind bc that thing was a pain to dig out and it’s heavy and unwieldy (and great, and written by someone with BPD, and great and personally completely revolutionary and did i mention great?)

but the garden and all the growth and the birds and squirrels and bugs and everything else makes me feel so calm, so connected to smth a lot greater and vaster than my household or immediate family or the stressors (living) downstairs, which helps.

[ryncorrect]

university!au: day6 sungjin

i’ve abandoned this au for so long istg my life is a mess yall please forgive but anyway im back with my bullshit and ready to spread my cringe-worthy stuff to the world again

name: park sungjin

major: practical music and arts

other activities: leader, guitarist, and vocalist of university band, president of music club, member of cooking club

park sungjin is the embodiment of leadership

i mean he’s the band leader, the club president, also the president of his class since year one, like he’s so trustworthy and responsible, literally nothing can go wrong under his sight

and even when things do go wrong (life is a bitch) he’ll still make sure everyone is fine and having the time of their lives pun intended

anyone who meets sungjin for the first time will probs say he has this tough man aura, cold,,, tsundere-ish idk

but as someone who have known each other for so long, you never understand when anyone says sungjin looks cold

you know damn well the moment sungjin opens his mouth he gonna throw dad jokes with his satoori dialect

dad jokes are fucking funny fight me

you once said sungjin should start his own comedy club

......he’s currently considering it

oh right he also talks about food all. the. time.

he joined cooking club for a reason okay

no, he can’t and doesn’t really cook he’s only there to taste food and people let him there because he’s nice and he knows how to appreciate the cooks

uh we love a man with manners

so, who is sungjin for you exactly?

he lives next door, one year older than you, was a leader even when you were little ayeee childhood friend cliche

can you imagine little sungjin leading his friends in game its so pure brb crying

you told him everything you couldn’t tell ur parents because they were busy, you asked for his advises, he made sure you were safe and happy

you still depend on him even after you two have grown up

you enrolled to the same university, took the same major with him, and even joined the clubs he’s a member of

this isn’t because you’re indecisive, it’s just that you spent so much of your childhood with sungjin that you two became similar to each other, up to your hobbies and interests and even palate lmao

that’s why he loves to eat with you because you two never argue about the menu

the only club you can’t join is the band, and that’s because jae rejected your application

reason: extremely close personal relationship with sungjin, therefore sungjin will take your side if we ever had an argument

you denied that; no, sungjin wont take anyone’s side based on feelings bc he’s a logical person and he always listens carefully to every side of the parties before he makes a decision..... but jae wont listen

brat

"you only rejected me because im a better guitarist”

“lalalalala cant hear you over my authority as the important band member”

“fuck you”

“i don’t accept offers”

anywayssss you did fail to join the band, but you’re friends with them, theyre literally so used to your company that sometimes they forgot youre not actually in the band

you and the guys teamed up for sungjin’s surprise birthday party

the surprise failed because dowoon accidentally added sungjin to the group chat

sungjin being nice and playing along anyway because he didnt want to disappoint you

and then its sungjin’s turn to ask the guys for help for your birthday party

failed again because dowoon AGAIN accidentally invited you, in person, to your own birthday party

dowoon what the heck?????

yeah its all cute and sweet but thats all of your relationship with sungjin, you treat him like a dependable brother and he treats you like his own little sister

thats what you tell to your friends too when they ask if you two are dating

they’re glad thats the case

because they have a crush on sungjin LMAOOOOO PLOT TWIST

they’re hoping they can get to sungjin through you yanno like asking you to send him snacks and letters or to tell him they say hi

you dont mind i mean you know sungjin is one admirable person ofc everyone likes him

sungjin never rejects nor accepts it hes just like “yay snacks!”

“god damn it sungjin just date any of them im tired of being a matchmaker”

“then dont?? literally no one asked you to”

little did you know that sungjin had the same problem

some of his classmates are interested in you but whenever they come to him he just says, “dont ask me i dont know anything and if i do i wont tell you”

this one sandeul guy has started asking you out and stuff

“ehhh youre so nice i’ll think about it!!”

you, immediately texting sungjin: ur friend sandeul ask me out what should i do

sungjin: do you like him tho

you: not really idk him yet

sungjin: just tell him your mom said no

you: damn nice

but this guy is so persistent and you gotta admit hes kinda cute and after a few tries you finally said yes to him

so you two went together and it was pretty fun

sungjin isnt too happy when he hears about it from sandeul

he asked you, “why didnt you tell me first?”

“well i dont think its a big deal. it was just a date anyway”

but you always told him everything

sungjin never speaks about it again

you go on another date with sandeul the week after

you tell sungjin later and he doesnt ask how it went

hes just “oh”

idk he’s kinda distant now, he rarely talks nor replies to your texts

he doesn't visit music club nor cooking club either so you don't see him often

have i told you im uncreative and all my aus are lame???

you think its probably because hes focusing for the finals, but even after it’s over sungjin doesnt really hang out with you or the band anymore like he only comes for practices and leaves right after

weirdly no one says anything about sungjin’s absence

but you cant stay quiet any longer and decide to ask dowoon whats wrong with sungjin

you shouldve known dowoon cant help much

“honestly i dont know either, maybe you should ask wonpil he’s sungjin’s roommate”

“but what if wonpil told sungjin”

“told sungjin what?”

“that i asked about him”

“asked him what?”

“...nevermind”

you asked younghyun

younghyun doesnt help either

“i dont know, just ask him yourself. i thought you were the closest to him??” why you so salty man

okay fine lets ask jae

“i’ll tell you for fifty bucks”

“dude im broke”

“then deal with it yourself”

you had no choice but to ask wonpil

“he’s just tired”

you know wonpil lied but this little shit refuses to tell anything

“please dont force me to answer i will cry really loudly and it’ll be embarrassing for the both of us”

why do you befriend them in the first place smh

oh youre right about wonpil telling sungjin that youre worried, and he does tell him to talk to you if he got something in mind

sungjins hesitant but in the end he only says, “no... its just that i didnt realize until recently that my little sister has grown up a lot”

“dear god wtf you sound like her grandma”

skip the boring part so uh a few more days passed awkwardly between you two and after your failed attempt at asking around you decide to confront sungjin in person

youre in the band practice room, the others are present, sungjin’s about to leave early as usual, and you find yourself jumping up your seat, “whats your problem with me?”

you know sungjin hates confrontation but you cant stand it anymore. you tried giving him time but if theres anything you seem to be more of a stranger to him

“i dont know what i did wrong and i wont know if you dont tell me, so let me know. i’ll listen and i’ll apologize if its my fault, but dont give me silent treatment like this. its so unlikely of you"

you can see sungjin clences his jaw as he replies calmly, "people change"

"you don't change, youre being childish. if you're mad you should talk about it. if you don't want me here you should tell me to go. if you don't like ME dating your friend you should tell me not to!!!"

drama much ryn

"youre your own person and you make your own choice, its your life and i cant keep telling you what to do or what not," and the end part kinda slips, "i don't hate you dating my friend or anyone, okay? im just not used yet to be a second person for you and im afraid youll get hurt"

"youre never?? a second person sungjin where does this idea even come from youre the only one for me i dont want anyone else???"

and suddenly there's a train of awkward coughs and you come back to your senses and you realize you're being watched

jae pretends to make a phone call, "mom pick me up im scared"

lame jae lame

dowoon mumbles, "can we,,, make an exit first before you two declare your undying love bc its privacy yanno"

you feel the heat spreading across your face as you open your mouth the same time as sungjin, both want to deny dowoon, but younghyun beats yall to it, "yeah you two are in love with each other we been know"

you and sungjin stares at each other, confused, "we don't???"

"oh honey,,, my dear,,, ive read enough sappy shit in writing club to see where this is going"

the conversation was cut there and neither of you bring it up again,

because the idea of you loving sungjin or sungjin loving you is so weird that you refuse to think about it, and so is for sungjin

but ever since that, sungjin has drastically come back to normal its almost hilarious, he spends a lot of time hanging out in the music club, practicing with the band, visiting the cooking club, making a joke here and there

sungjin is himself again with you, a caring dependable brother whom you come to whenever you need to talk or just hang out with and he always makes sure he has time for you

sap

you know hes always been like that but why does it feel different now??? the way he smiles or pulls your hand so youre walking on the inner side of the road,,, how he neatly places your spoon and chopsticks on a napkin when you two go out to eat together,,,, why

tender love baby chICKEN TENDER

mydayexol follow me

andddd so one day, someone asked you out. again.

wow ur so popular i cant Relate

you, texting sungjin: sandeuls friend jinyoung something invited me to a party next saturday should i come

sungjin, replying to you: hmm

you: ???

sungjin: i think its up to you

for some reason youre disappointed by his reply,,, but he’s right tho its your call if you wanna go then you go its not about what sungjin says

right?

right???

but suddenly you got another text: but if you ask for my opinion i would say don't go

you: actually i dont want to either lol so what should i say

sungjin: tell him you already have a date

you: nice

sungjin: with me

you: ayyeee

you: wait what

sungjin: i mean its just a suggestion

sungjin: which you can accept

sungin: or reject

for some reason you can imagine sungjin’s cheeky smile through his texts and it makes your inside tingles and you wanna giggle

so yea you thought it was a joke but he actually did take you out for a movie and dinner

it was really nice

so yanno the weird thing is that neither of you ask the other to be “official” but you just. are dating.

ur friends are mad like “bUT YOU SAID YOU TWO WERENT A THING”

“lol sry i changed my mind”

“fuck you”

“no thanks sungjin can do that... bUT DONT TELL SUNGJIN I SAID THAT hes gonna kill me”

“is he ur mom”

“basically yeah”

this sucks real bad but who cares

not me obviously

ill be back soon (or not) with dowoon’s one lets hope i can do better than this dnsjfsndfj lnjajnfdjs lmAO I LOVE YALL AND HAPPY NEW YEAR IN ADVANCE