#yall ever get tired? but cant sleep? sucks.

[the-greatest-8]

The rain hits the roof and makes soft pitter-patter like noise, making a soft sound to ground myself in. I blink, slow and sluggish, with tired and reddened eyes. My thoughts swirl and curl possessively around my mind, trapping me in a cycle of self-loathing and fears. My chest is tight, and my breath stutters and catches as I attempt to breathe deeply.

I feel awful, truly, is an understatement. My head throbs in agreement as I wince- the clock on my side table ticks a steady rhythm as I spiral. The blanket on my body is soft, but too heavy, too much, it weighs on my body like bags of sand. I kick it off, frustrated and teary, and attempted to curl further into a ball.

A train passes by from afar, the rumbling of it on the tracks soothes me slightly, before the thundering blare of the horn makes me whimper in acute agony. I flop to my other side, molding myself close to the wall in an attempt to drown it all out.

My eyes burn even worse as tears drip from them, snot dribbles down my nose as I aggressively wipe it away. A pathetic and choked sob frees itself from my throat. I shiver and shake, too cold and too hot all at the same time. Too tired and too awake- with it being too loud and too silent.

My heart pounds in my chest despite the tight curl of emotions surrounding it and my lungs. My stomach heaves and twists, leaving me biting back vomit. My skin; it itches and shivers, my arms covered in small goosebumps. I sniffle and burrow my face in them, trying to hide from the shadows of my mind, trying to flee my bodies betrayals.

[a-court-of-moonlight-and-ire]

Not to be overly morbid, but do yall ever think about suicide in prythian? Personally, i think killing yourself would be pretty common. I mean, it has to be given how few old people seem to exist in this world even though fae (or atleast high-fae) seem to insanely powerful and difficult to kill

And I dont think its because living in prythian sucks THAT much or even because being immortal is THAT bad, i mean arguably the biggest issue with immortality would be to watch all your loved ones die and thats not something that sjm's fae have to deal with. I think its moreso a thing of people just kinda getting tired of living after a few centuries and being like "welp. ive experienced pretty much everything, time to explore the world beyond" yknow. Thats why I think Velaris would have a pretty high suicide rate, because if youre stuck in a city thats presumably completely stagnant and never changes because its already perfect, youre going to run out of new enjoyable things to do wayyyy more quickly and get tired of your existence. It would also explain how this city full of immortals that can never leave but can reproduce hasnt already collapsed under the weight of overpopulation after over 5000 years

One idea that i like because it could make for some poignant commentary is that suicide rates are really high among faeries because theyre a lot more likely to live in poverty and its really hard to escape poverty and its really fucking miserable so after a few decades most of them decide they dont wanna live like that, and its gotten to the point where the high fae think they just naturally have shorter lifespans for some biological reason when they can actually live just as long as high fae, its just that they take poison or some shit to die in their sleep or something idk. Maybe thats a little very dark for acotar, but then again, sjm is constantly throwing around domestic violence and abuse and rape in this series so

I think suicide rates among high lords would be pretty high as well because I imagine their lives are pretty monotonous and tiring because of their responsibilities and because its not like they can leave prythian for an extended period of time to experience some new things or have some fun adventures, theyre tied to their court geographically. And god, can you imagine what would happen if theres a crisis. Yknow how a while ago the UK went through like 5 prime ministers in two weeks because of some bullshit that was happening? Imagine that but its just all these newly-chosen high lords killing themselves because they cant handle their court for some reason. I actually have a theory that thats what happened in the night court because theres this weird little throaway line where they say like, Mor's family used to be the ruling family but then the highlord power somehow got transferred to Rhys' family and its been driving me insane because WHAT do mean by that??? So basically, I think there was a time when Mor's highlord-chosen ancestors kept killing themselves for one reason or another, none of them wanted to be highlord and the magic of the land kept reaching out further and further until it landed on like, Rhysand's great-granddad who was only distantly related to Mor's ancestors and the ruling line just continued from there

Anyway, Id like to end this post on a more positive note and talk about the demographic that I think is the least likely to kill themselves, and thats the youngest children of noble families with multiple children. As ive said, im mostly basing this off of any given fae's ability to have a lot of new experiences to keep their lives from becoming monotonous and tiresome (combined with their material circumstances) and I think the youngest children of nobles hit the sweet spot of being pretty wealthy and not needing to do a lot of hard labour that would take up their time while also not being tied down by responsibilities that would force them to stay in one place. (Unless its a family of all girls and the youngest is their only son ig because as of acomaf, prythian is super patriarchal but i try not to think abt that ngl)

[omegawolverine]

puts my chin in my hands n kicks my feet behind me. bff do u have any headcanons for craig and those guys, i love the way ur brain interprets these silly paper cutout guys ^_^

yaaaa ofc bestie <3

craig:

-is a movie snob but not in a "this movie needs to be the most well written film Ever" way, he's a snob in a "if this movie isnt so bad my sides hurt from laughing i just wont fucking watch it" way. seed of chucky is peak film to him

-has two left feet but likes to dance <3 his lanky body does not agree with the movement but that wont stop him from bussin it down celibate style or whatever they call it nowadays

-used to build wooden model airplanes and then paint them with tricia (i almost typed ruby somebody take my hands away), most of them are hung in her room but craig kept a few

-this mfer the type to go to college with literally zero plan, decide to take art after being undecided for as long as possible, hate art bc they make him do other types of art besides what he normally does, then drop out or smth along those lines

token:

-the worst excuse for a mom friend but the guys dont care. he can't cook. he will send them a text just saying "go bed" at like 10pm before immediately going to bed himself and not bothering to see if any of them actually Plan To Sleep. carries around bandaids but will not give them out unless they are deserved (you fell jumping off the swing? dont jump of the swing next time, bitch. no bandaid for u). literally only the mom friend bc nobody else could fill the role

-white chicks is unironically his favorite movie, right next to the medea halloween movie (incase yall forgot token canonically likes tyler perry movies. i cannot blame him. they suck so bad they're good)

-he dresses like a 60 year old dad going fishing or like he is going to the most important meeting of his life, no inbetween

-wants to learn an instrument really bad but has sucked at every single one he's tried so far, not to mention he cant read sheet music for shit.

-is the only one in his class who can write in cursive but he only learned bc both his parents wrote in cursive and he got tired of not being able to be nosey when he found notes around the house. turns out they were mostly grocery lists and appointment reminders.

clyde:

-he/they user

-^ goes thru a gender identify crisis in the 10th grade before goin nah. just a dude who likes they/them pronouns sometimes.

-is on the football team all throughout high school but only bc they need more players. everyone knows he sucks at the game. he does not gain any sort of popularity from being on the team, but he stays so he has an excuse to get out of the house more 🤷‍♀️

-dylexic AND dyscalcic. double whammy! with a side of adhd <3

-is craigs certified dance partner whenever the dude starts jamming. craig will just drag him out to the middle of the room and make him lead in a shitty foxtrot.

-speaking of craig, the height difference between them is crazy. craig gets tall, ofc, but clyde is just kinda. at his chest. face in boobies. it's like u got the absolutely twig of a man at 6'4" and then there's his bestie at 5'6", dragging him around by their linked arms.

tweek:

-despite the whole meth thing, regular coffee is actually apart of his enrichment. it's like the adhd meds he never got, without the extra upper of doing way too much meth on a day to day basis! is a fan of the starbucks iced carmel frappes.

-likes to cook when he is overwhelmed but cooking for him means being up and moving the entire time otherwise he will start to overthink again. he cant do none of that oven cook shit. give him a meal that requires a lot of prep work and watching the stove so he will be busy for a good hour and suddenly it's like he was never upset to begin with.

-an alt baby <3 screamo calms him

-^ wants to take the guys to a concert but clyde "has never listened to something not in the top 40s" donovan and craig "nearly died in the pit at a local punk gig that kenny dragged him to" tucker are against this idea.

jimmy:

-him 🤝 craig

shitty scifi movies

-^ anything with bad aliens in it will become his new obsession for like 4 months and everyone will have to hear about it. hyperfixation go brrr or whatever

-hates scripting sets for the life of him. like. will just write down jokes and hope he remembers bc he cannot be fucked to actually attempt to stick with his own plans

-speaking of scripts, he enjoys a bit of acting but, again, cannot be fucked with scripts. he hates memorizing and feels like it sounds more. well. scripted, when he actually memorizes lines, rather than just getting the jist of his lines and how his character acts and improving it. this technique has mixed results and, obviously, does not go over well with other people he is supposed to be acting with

-^ that being said he is a hit in improv classes ofc

-becomes a big fan of photography sometime in high school, is the resident phototaker both of the group and the grade. if people are posting a candid group photo, it's probably from him

[savnofilter]

Kinktober Day 9

Natsuo ➷ Midoriya ➷ Kirishima ➷ Fatgum ➷ Shinso  ➷ Tamaki ➷ Todoroki ➷ Bakugo ➷ Shindo ➷ Giran ➷  Dabi ➷ Shigaraki ➷ All For One 

☠️ warning(s): ⚠️ everything between both parties is consensual. ⚠️ 𝕤𝕠𝕞𝕟𝕠𝕡𝕙𝕚𝕝𝕚𝕒, con/dubcon.

☠️ genre: smut, holiday special.

☠️ words: 260+ [about one minute each].

☠️ read more: kinktober(uary)

☠️ summary: instead of the original fic idea, i swapped it out with somnophilia hcs,,, enjoy.

Natsuo (x)

giving:

wellllll since i dont know much about him i dont feel like he’s really into it. Up to your choices tbh.

feel like once on a blue moon he’ll wake up and decide he wants his dick in you like a thermometer or just finger you until you wake up.

isnt really something you guys discussed, he kinda just admired how beautiful you are.

if hes ever feeling freaky-deaky mayhaps he’ll eat you out,,,

he fucking loves it when you reciprocate his touches, it urges him to continue and tease you more. 

honestly just being able to pleasure you himself is what gets him rock hard, he doesnt even want anything in return he just wants to hear your sighs and moans.

natsuo's first just cause ion feel like it's something he does every day, more like once in a while just to tease you~

receiving:

to dooont talk about receiving --, hes a sucker for waking up with his pp in your mouth. 🤭

he likes to flex it when it's in, pushing you just a little lower just to hear you gag a bit. 

"Sorry babe, couldn't help myself~"

…. well thats aight with me-

isnt big on full-on making you choke on him but if you wake him with the glawk glawk 3000 he’ll have a brighter day. 

hes a Todoroki so just know he has the gene being a sadistic teaser. 

if you wake him up with cock warming he will literally marry you while he destroys your guts.

he likes somnophilia 11/10. 

Midoriya (x, x)

giving:

Midoriya is mostly timid, already having the consent talk between you two but hes still nervous.

oftentimes he just grinds up against you and keeps you close, but sometimes his hands do wander in other places.

when he first starts to experiment, he likes to soft kiss your neck and rubs his hips against you softly.

he might squeeze your breasts here and there to tease you, hands snaking under your shirt to feel your warm skin against his calloused and strong hands.

like headcanon before, Midoriya doesnt like to do penetration until he knows he has your full-on consent.

hes sweet but dont expect him to go full on soft with you lol. 

forbiddddddd Midoriya chooses oral because this boi will go for how long it takes his tongue to get tired. 

and thats not very easy. 

he loves to admire your body so most often he does it out of the,,, love he has. 🥴

and hes a closet perv too. 

receiving:

if you give it to him -- instant NUT. no cap. 

he'll be like "H-Honey" and then tense up and just nut.

but ofc being the good s/o you are, you still continue because youre a good s/o like that. 

bonus points if you treat him like hes a dirty perv for liking it, also gets on his subside if you really wanna degrade him too. 

some times when hes awake enough he can have the dom energy but most times her cant help but be a pillow prince for you~~

and he doesnt mind either. he enjoys it. there's something down inside him that just helps him sleep at night that you use him for your pleasure and his. 

there's just a whole lot to unwrap here. ;)

Kirishima (x)

giving:

hm.

to place Kirishima in third being hes the type to stay up like an hour after youve fallen asleep and stick his cock in you so he can feel you grind up against every few times throughout the night. 

gives you a few encouraging thrusts before he does fall asleep just to give your body a bit of a head start. 

wraps his arms around your waist to ensure you cant escape him. 😳

of course since he is like this, somnophilia has been discussed between you two so he's not on full on creep mode. 

sometimes he'll wake you up by just pounding into you at full send. 

likes to tease sensitive parts of your body just to get you to wake up,,, bites marks littered on your skin as well. 

hes careless and the only thing he is really focused on is? hes not sure. he just know he fucking loves doing it with you too. 

best part is when he records and then faps to the footage later-

but what can he do, he likes to cherish every moment you two share ~

receiving:

oh please wake him up like that. 

he has no qualms if its him in your mouth or you taking him inside you he just wants it. 

when you wake up him like that he honestly feels like maybe there is someone up there. 

is such a moaner. 

he likes it when youre a little rough too, cant help but be a masochist when he wakes up smh. 

if you ride him please let him choke on your fingers -- better yet have your ass face his direction so he can do whatever he wants with your lower parts as well. 

even when you are giving he still wants to reciprocate as well, he loves to have your pleasured whenever you two get busy.

most times when you engage in somnophilia it has to be days when he has off. why? he might just go all day. 

pleasure him, but do it wisely. 🤧

Fat gum (x)

giving:

taishiro is the type of guy to like put his dick in your mouth lol. 

not even like get you slicked up or anything, just cock in mouth. 

probably gets you semi undressed before he gropes you like a creep, getting his cock hard before opening your sleeping mouth and slipping his dick into your mouth.

makes you choke on his cock to wake you up, enjoying it when you dont have time to hide your gag reflex and watch as you try and get use to his tip pressing at the back of your throat. 

half of the time, taishiro doesnt even wake you up. he plays with you just to get you wet and stinky.

sometimes he diddles himself and cums on you just to have you confused when you wake up. 

honestly beats Midoriya at being a closet pervert, but does he really try to hide it?

receiving:

hmmmmmm

he doesnt really care to receive it. 

sure it's a very nice surprise to wake up to but he prefers it when hes the one playing with you. 

likes it better if youre taking him with one of your lower holes just because he already has enough experience with your mouth wrapped around his cock. 

if riding him manages to wake him up, teasing him wont go on for any longer. he has no choice but to take over and just ran your brains out. 

when hes done flipping the script and you both are satisfied you more out of shape than him, he'll be like,

"Welp, crepe for breakfast?"

Shinso (x)

giving:

oral central

i cant think of shinso having his ding-ding be the first thing to tease you when you wake up with fingers and oral. no and's, no but's. 

he doesnt like to rush you up on waking up, more with the smooth process and it isnt really doing it for a reaction.

he just wants to toy with you.

honestly, like fat gum he does it so youre usually in a confused state when you wake up. horny but not knowing why and knowing full-well you didnt have a wet dream either. 

its not until a few more times of him doing it is when you realize it's his doing and that in itself has you in a blushing mess. 

not expecting that from him at all but not complaining. 😳

sometimes you dress just a little provocatively just to inspire him~

receiving:

if you dont wake him up with his cock in your mouth hes gonna have a bad day. >:(

jk, he respecs wamen. 

deadass do it once and he might just marry you. 

if youre doing a little under par from what you usually do, he'll just have to nudge yah a lil, push you on, use his quirk. 

"Fuck -- just like that kitten~"

WELL DAMN IF YOU DIDNT WANT TO SUCK THE SOUL OUT OF HIM ALREADY-

he doesnt really care if you wake him up like that, much appreciated but he doesnt really care. 

i mean if you do, just get ready for an early morning of face fucking… just saying. 

Tamaki (x)

giving:

yall aint ready for this one. 

some people may say, 'aw tamaki would wake up s/o and just cuddle her to death uwu<3", while yes he will, dont underestimate him.

to think of him in somnophilia is where we break the closet pervert ends. 

hes more of like, i really like my dick and i really like you so i’ll just go on and fuck you awake.

theres on lead up or anything, he’ll full on give you brain or just fuck you as if you are awake, apologising profusely once you do wake up.

“I-I’m s-sorry to wake you like this… I couldn’t help myself…”

he’ll never fully use quirk on you while you sleep though. thats a big nope from him.

when he sexs you up he wants it to be fully him… and only him.

(i mean its his quirk from him -- but you get the point!)

CEO of going till ya numb.

his favorite his sticking his dick into you and rutting into you like a dog in a rut. 

definitely is a groper. cannot and will not convince me otherwise.

he just really loves it when you moan out for him and make cute noises~ its all he needs to start off for a good day.

receiving:

well, it definitely is a pleasant surprise.

doesnt affect him like he does when he wakes you up but he appreciates your efforts.

most times when hes conscience enough he’ll just take over as if you werent trying to surprise him before.

honestly if youre looking for an early pounding thats the best time and way to get him into action.

since he sees it as teasing he cant help but have to pay you back.

he’ll be straight up clapping dem cheeks and he’ll just be like “you feel so fucking good” with the nicest sounding moan anyone can mumble into your ear.

yeah…. I encourage doing it to him. 

gets him nice and possessive giving you both a good time while he can live out his lil dom fantasies for the day.

//win win.

Todoroki (x, x)

receiving:

hes like a blushing mess.

if you couldnt see him as a sub before, well get ready for this.

catch him off guard and guarantee youll get a completely different Shouto.

he turns into a full on pillow prince, with no shame. As long as you focus on getting him off he’ll let you do what he wants.

if you especially focus on his soft spots that dont have to do with his nipples or the third leg between his legs that when youll get him puddy under your hands.

“Y-Y/N..~”

well shit, say your name like that and he might make you revert submissive behaviour too.

you treat him like a perfect lil’ prince whenever he does, wanting to pamper him anyways.

on a rare chance could you spark him into flipping the tables but thats more on a random occurrence more than anything.

note to self: sub Sho? surprise him.. ✍️

Bakugo (x, x)

giving: 

this one is kindaaaa tricky.

now, Katsuki wont do it often. but when he does it, he does it with uhh,,,, passion. if you would like to call it that.

he mimics all the spots you loved to be touched when youre awake just to see how long it takes for your body to wake up and realize that hes playing with you.

calculated in his actions, obviously. hes not some idiot who rushes, everything he does is precise whether or not you know it.

because of this, being able to please you is easy so his clear motive? not very sure….

maybe it's to see you squirm and wake up? mayhaps to see what pure pleasure looks like written over your face. who knows, all you knew is that he always had a smug look on his face when he was able to make you cum by the end of it. 

thats if…. he let you that is.

receiving:

sort of like Todoroki, you may just get him to be the whole bottom in the term, "power bottom". 

tries to hold in moans and groans but usually fails which makes him sooooo frustrated. 

if he gets too flustered he'll make you stop and give whatever you have him by tenfold. 

brace yourself for a long and bumpy ride, you may have to do it on days he isnt going to work that day because he'll sure rock you out of this world. 

best if done on holidays as well, itll leave you walking a lil awkward for a few days. 

and of course, that isnt okay for being on the job is it?

Shindo (x)

giving: 

ddjhvbjhvb

hes this high on the list for a reason.

ongggggggg he’ll tease the ever living shit out of you until he gets bored or decides youve earned it.

damn snarky wont even prep your body or anything, just straight out the cut uses his quirk just to get your senses all riled up. 

does everything on the scale of full on senses to just barely touching you. 

his teasing always wakes you up into a confused state that is wanting to more, shamelessly begging for him to continue.

he carries great pride in taking responsibility in getting you like this. but dont be mistakened! he will not go easier on you just because you woke up. 

you had only just felt the pre-course to the real action~

buckle up, kitten. 

receiving:

nope. if youre going to take advantage of him, he wants to fully aware. 

… for sadistic reasons more than consensual. 

Giran (x)

giving:

this old fucking man. 

likes to sneak in and just feel you up good. 

of course he doesnt want through his back out so yknow- im just kidding. 

giran will go to town if he has to. 

but most times, the old fart just loves to, "make love" to his darling. 

calls you sweet petnames in your ear as you sleep, just so you can dream about you too. 

he knows how to tease and play with you. he can finish the job without even so much as stirring you awake. 

hes studied you long enough and has played with you enough to make you finish as well. 

it's magic honestly, and his best part is leaving you with the mess between your legs and nothing but confusion written all over your face. 

how could he know that's your reaction although he leaves before you can wake up? 

simple. hes always has his ways~

receiving:

the few rare times he let's you into his humble abode is when you decide to treat him. 

really adament of sucking him off to wake him up just to see his early morning smile. 

him rewarding you with giving you the same treatment or dirty praise is all you need before you leave and act as if you werent sleeping around with a villain recruiter and his #1 sugar baby for that matter. 

when you surprise him in his study is the real kicker. 

youve been under his desk many times to be familiar with the spot and assume the position. 

you usually bring up breakfast or dinner (whichever time you arrive) and wake him up in the good way that motivates him to continue on with his stressful job.

surely, he can never thank you enough. if it wasnt for your efforts, he wouldnt know how to deal with himself~

Dabi (x, x)

giving:

✨ rise n shine, dabi's fat cock is here to wake you up. ✨

this asshole -- this asshole. 

has no shame at all. he knows full well what hes doing. 

likes to feel you up and just feel at you sometimes. hes so touch starved that he cant even help it. 

he ranges from teasing you till you wake up to full-on fucking your brains out. 

of course he enjoys it when youre confused but wanting more, your body more than ready to receive his hands. 

at some point, you just like to tease him for it too. usually he catches onto your game and plays accordingly. 

he cant help but feel blessed that someone he loves so very much could enjoy the same interests he does as well. 

just let him know you like it when he feels you up and he'll give it to you anytime you ask~

receiving:

would not recommend unless you want early-morning-face fucking.

like you wouldnt catch someone wake up from something like that faster than Dabi. 

you may wonder why, it's just his touch starved nature. im telling you, it responds to anything. 

no matter what position, how you do it you will get a positive reaction from him. 

tell me you cant imagine him moaning, "that's it, doll~ swallow my cock like the slut you are~"

IN A SLEEPY RASPY VOICE??? HELLO 🤧

this man is just a walking breathing example of what the word simp feels like. 

youre supposed to turn away because hes not the type of guy to fall in love with but most times like this is when you cant help it..

Shigaraki (x, x)

giving:

master diddler, yes he is. 

hes the type to not even stick his cock in, just like hump at you like a needy animal and just mark up your neck as if he hasnt had sex in years. 

is the type to use other parts of your body to get off just to avoid pleasuring you as he gets off.

youll wake up to his cum in various spots. between your legs, on your chest and even your armpits. if it has a place where his cock can fit its going there.

he doesnt give a shit if you fuss about it later, “why didn’t you cum inside” headass.

youll have to earn him using you like cocksleeve the proper way.

youre either a heavy sleeper or light because you can wake up as soon as he starts or wake up after hes done.

Either way, as long as he can see the pureness on your expression is all he needs to help his perverse needs.

Shigaraki isnt the person to use you during your sleep without having at least talked it with you.

yeah hes a creep but hes not that weird.

likes to whisper degrading stuff into your ear when you sleep just so you can dream about what hes doing to you, his hands not stopping a moment as he gets off to feeling you up.

just dont expect anything less then degenerate from him 

receiving:

you have to be a special type of breed to even think about touching him without him being in control.

the thought of you possibly being able to one-up him is a no-no.

he wont allow it.

if he even senses you thinking about it he’ll stir awake and glare at you as if there is no tomorrow.

but say you do manage to catch him off guard, this may be the only times you can really edge a moan out of him of.

so use your time wisely.

All for one (x)

giving:

ive said it once, i'll say it again. 

you just have no rights bro. im sorry. 

he wakes him sometimes and just goes, "this bitch deserves a rude awakening today". 

like okay mr fuckface. 

is the one that is always on x games mode, no softness for him at all.  

probably has you wear those kitten/mitten collar things like*cough cough* kakegurui *cough cough* even when youre carrying out errands for him. 

the point is honestly to keep you in place, and you cant help but like it anyways. 

some may dislike being viewed as a pet or anything less but you love it hence why you stay. 

plus, if you could runaway, would you be able to?

nevermind that, you didnt want someone else to replace you so youll stay his obedient bitch for now.. 😌

receiving:

you wouldnt. you just wouldnt.

[milkacchan]

Self indulgent Aizawa x reader upcoming. Aizawa having a younger sister that's in class 1-A 😌😌

• He's worried :)

• he's very worried

• Just about you in

• He was about 15 when you were born

• Brother instincts are on POINT

• This man is closer to a dad than your real one

• NOTHING and I mean NOTHING goes unnoticed by him

• You're feeling a little sad? He notices, you want ice cream?

• Upset? Here, punching bag.

• Happy? He'll smile warmly and prod at what has you so excited

• No one in class A really puts it together that you and Aizawa are siblings (you two keep the sibling rivalry and insults to a bare minimum in class)

• That is until Monoma decides to try to use it against you

• You're not really sure how he found out

• Maybe he saw you two after class or in public

• Not that it mattered but

"The ONLY reason you're part of 1A- UA, for that matter is because your brother is Aizawa. You didn't earn your place,"

• SIKE ITS TRAINING

• A swift kick to the head and the bitch is OUT oops

• Well now the cats out of the bag

• 😐

• It's kind of already something you were struggling with in the first place, not knowing if you were actually good enough

• But hearing someone else say it hurt a lil bit bro ngl

• And Aizawa knows he cant make that go away which sucks because he doesn't want you to feel like that

• Anyway, cue a lot of questions from 1A

• The first being 'is it true'

• The second being 'what's he like outside of school?'

• And cue them telling you that what Monoma said was BS

• They had no idea you were his sister and you had more than earned your place

• The sibling bickering begins 😌

• You can be annoying know without having to worry about it because now everyone knows

'Hello rat,"

'Problem child.' He squints, eyeing you as you walk into the class room.

• or 'hey give me a five," he holds his hand out

'Fatass,' you mumble before handing him the money

• or 'Hello? Stupid bitch??' You peak your head into the classroom

'Jesus christ what do you want?'

'Listen-'

• the two of you can and will fight over literally nothing

• It doesnt not matter who is there, if you can talk about it, you'll annoy him about it

• Snapchat???

• Snapchat

• The snaps yall share are literal gold okay

• His dry sarcasm is your reason to live

• His contact name in your phone is dumb hoe tm 🥰

• Your contact name in his phone is problem child 👁👄👁

• He's so tired of you unironically listening to the minecraft soundtrack on repeat

• Please, he just wants peace

• Why must you torture him in this way

• turns out Denki and Hanta also listen to it 😌

• Trio's are made

• He tries not to pick favorites

• He really does

• But he'll be there for you first, because you're his sister. You're family. No one else matters if you're hurt.

• He also works you the hardest. He wants you to succeed so he wont let you slack off

• Ever

• Laughs in your FACE when he makes yall walk to that training camp :)

• 'Good luck RAT'

'Count your fucking days bitch,'

• Is also TORN if you get hurt/kidnapped during the incident

• And he still has to keep it in wraps so he cant flip out

• It hurts him so much

• He definitely learned how to do your hair when you were a kid and he's still the one who braids it

• You can do it yourself, you know how, but like? Quality time with him is too good to pass up

• So most mornings you'll shuffle to his room and knock

• And he'll groan but wake up to let you in

• And then he'll brush it and braid it how you want

• And when he's done he'll sometimes kiss your forehead and then definitely go back to sleep until he's late for class

• Listen you two give eachother a lot of shit but he's always going to he there

• He's also one of those brothers who takes you out to nice dinner so you learn not to settle for pieces of shit

• he has to approve of every guy/girl before you date

• He's def dreading when you bring someone to him though

• Especially if its class 1A

• But everyone in that class is a good kid (aside from Mineta) so he wouldn't particularly mind it

• Unless its Kaminari or Bakugou

• If it's Kaminari or Bakugou he's going to have a stroke

• Ultimately he'd be okay w it

[comfyswitcherblanketfort]

Wash Day

Yall I just really want Trisskel to be a solid couple from like, day one and be happy and in love and hhhnnngggg. I have feelings. (specifically Netflix Triss and Game Eskel) 

Summary: Modern AU Eskel helps Triss with wash day when she cant use her arms. 

Warnings: Mentions of burn injuries and burns in healing process, nothing gorey, just the mention of scabs, temporary dependency, dealing with the shitty mental part of recovering from major injuries/surgeries - not fucking bathing, eskel is not flexible and tries so hard to do things right. bless, lol swearing as is usual

I’d like to put a little disclaimer that I did a bunch of natural hair care research for this but I have no experience save from helping my friend diffuse her hair before class. 

________________

Triss groaned and tossed her phone to the other end of the couch she was perched on, wiping her one good hand over her face. Her burns over her chest still weren’t allowing her much range of motion with her right arm and her hair was starting to drive her absolutely insane. Yennefer was going to come over and help with wash day, but Ciri got in a fight at school, leaving Triss to sit with an itchy, ratted, and, frankly, horrendous head of hair. 

She leaned her head back against the arm of the couch and sighed, not even able to adjust the bun Eskel had helped her with that morning. 

Speaking of…

She scooted over the couch to pick up her phone, tapping the little call icon under his nickname, “Hey, Yen can’t come over tonight. No need to pick up the wine,” she sighed. 

“Are you sure? Nothing wrong with a little treat, babe.” 

“I’m sure. It was more for her efforts than my treat anyway.”

“If you say so… How are you feeling?”

“Less shit than this morning. I’m just tired,” she didn’t add the feeling of hopelessness that went along with not even being able to bathe on her own. He worried enough for the both of them and then some. 

“I’m picking up the good wine. I’ve got one more client then I’m done. Maybe take a nap?”

“Skel…”

“I will spoil you if I want to. Oh! Look! There’s my 3:30! Bye Bug! Love you!” he hung up on her before she could protest.

She rolled her eyes as she lowered the phone into her lap, smiling a little despite her annoyance. 

Gingerly, she made her way to their bedroom and laid down, running the risk of taking out the bun to lay comfortably. She turned on a podcast she told Jask she’d listen to and hoped to zone out at the least, if not actually sleep. 

-

Triss was woken by Eskel stomping in their front door and dropping his gym bag with a dramatic thud. A few moments later she could hear grocery bags settling on the kitchen counter, the distinct sound of wine bottles bumping together reminding her what he probably had planned. 

She ever so slowly tipped over and pushed herself up with her left hand, catching a horrifying full-body reflection in the mirrored closet doors. 

The scabs and little spots that were still bandaged she was starting to get used to, but the rest of her? Looking at herself in sweats that hadn’t been changed in two days, a summer tank top with no bra and coffee stains, and mismatching fuzzy christmas socks was… difficult. Her hair was wild, all the curls stretched out and sticking together in big frizzy clumps that stuck out at odd angles. 

She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. It had only been four weeks. No one was going to be back to normal after four weeks. Her body was using all its energy to heal, not look put together.

Regardless of her efforts she felt the tears well up in her eyes and her breath hitch with the effort of holding them back. 

It still fucking sucked.

Eskel’s soft touch on her thigh made her jump, “Is it hurting again?”

She shook her head, opening her eyes to see him knelt in front of her with his eyebrows drawn up in worry, “No. I’m okay,” she whispered, pulling herself together and resting her hand over his. 

Eskel tilted his head, “Then what’s wrong?”

“I… I look like I fell down the garbage chute,” she laughed. It wasn’t her usual, musical laugh, though. She laughed because she knew, in the grand scheme of things, it was ridiculous. It felt stupid to be worried about how she looked when she’d lived and, well, laughing was better than more tears.

“You’re always lovely to me,” Eskel hummed, brushing her tears away with the back of his knuckles.

She leaned into his touch and took a steadying breath, “I just don’t feel like me.”

He stretched up to kiss her forehead, “I’m sorry, Bug.”

She just shrugged and squeezed his hand. 

“Yen called. I got a very long lecture on wash day and firm orders to help you wash and deep condition your hair. If you’re feeling up to it,” Eskel flashed that crooked grin she could never resist and she shrugged, a small smile tugging at the corners of her lips. 

“Are you prepared to follow instructions?” she teased. 

“Babe,” he raised one eyebrow, “the only instructions I don’t follow are on Top Ramen packs.”

-

Eskel seemed to have confused ‘instruction’ with ‘directions’.

“I swear to God, Eskel. You don’t have to read the ‘how to use’ blurb,” Triss groaned, sitting on a kitchen chair they’d moved into the bathroom with dripping wet hair, “Just section off my hair and do what I tell you.” 

“But I don’t want to use too much,” he protested, “This says to use one tablespoon!”

“Yeah! For natural blondes! I have completely different hair and know what I’m doing. Use half the bottle! I don’t care! Just get it fucking clean!” 

Eskel rested his hand on her good shoulder and gave her an apologetic look in the mirror, “I’m sorry. How many sections do you want?” 

“I- it’s not a number. You just- kneel down for me I’ll show you,” she pointed at the floor next to her and sighed, missing Yen more than ever. She drew little lines with her nails through Eskel’s hair as she explained just how to scrub while making the least amount of tangles possible. He watched her in the mirror and pointed to the points on her scalp she was talking about with a look of serious concentration. 

It was cute. Even if he was a little inflexible he really did want to do a good job. 

Conditioner was easier, even combing out the tangles went fairly smooth. They took a break and made dinner, breaking open the good wine. 

Just having her hair down and somewhat bouncy again made Triss feel a million times better. The sweats were exchanged for yoga pants and the tank top for one of Eskel’s sweaters too. It almost felt normal. 

They ate ice cream while he worked the deep conditioning mask through her hair. 

“You sure I’m not using too much?” he asked, leaning over her shoulder to take the bite she held up for him, nice and small so he didn’t get a brain freeze. 

“Fbe moreb fbe bedder,” she tried speaking around a giant bite of ice cream, giggling at the face of confusion he made with the spoon still sticking out of his mouth. 

She swallowed and scrunched her nose at the light brain freeze, “The more, the better. We’ll rinse it out in the morning and I don’t want any dry spots.”

He nodded and waited for her to take the spoon back before getting back to work, “Yes ma’am.” 

“Mmm, I like that.” 

Eskel rolled his eyes as she let down a new section, “Oh do you, now? I had no idea.” 

“Mhm!” she nodded with a proud smile, taking another bite of ice cream and earning a chuckle from him. 

She walked him through a couple rough twists and adjusting the plastic soaking cap before attempting to explain how to tie a headscarf. He was… truly awful. Somehow she ended up almost blindfolded before she just gave up and found him a video to follow. It took him a few tries, but eventually he got it the right level of snug. I 

She tried to tilt her head back to look at him but that pulled at some of her new scar tissue, so she tried another angle and another before she huffed and resorted to standing up to look at him, “Thank you Skel.”

“No problem, Bug,” he hummed, wrapping his arms around her waist and kissing her nose. 

Triss laid her head on his chest, the perfect height for him to rest his chin on top of her head, “No, I mean it. It… helps. A lot.”

He rubbed soothing circles over her back, swaying them slightly, “I’m just glad I could do something…” he took a breath like he wanted to say something more but settled for pressing a kiss to the sloppily tied scarf. She hummed and leaned into him, snaking her hands around his hips and up under his shirt to rest over his back dimples. 

Triss could have stayed there forever. 

[rueren]

haikyuu boys and coffee

purely self indulgent. i have zero reason or evidence for anything 😭😭😭(didn’t do all the characters but i did as many as i could remember)

dont give them caffeine for the love of god don't do it:

HINATA ... self explanatory tbh.  throw him a mini snickers n hes set for another 6 hours

BOKUTO... another self explanatory one.  if he’s getting tired give him like 3 skittles and hell be fine

Terushima ... just don't im begging u please don't give him coffee.  he hallucinates

NOYA  ... he will bounce off of the walls dont do this to yourself him

tanaka ... honestly i think hes fine on his own but if hes with noya, they'll do something stupid like see who can handle more espresso shots before getting heart palpitations 

kogenagawa ... this baby doesnt even like coffee dont let him have any im bEGGING  he’ll hurl

LEV ... oh my god no please he’ll drink straight espresso thinking it’s regular n be like this is light work yall r babies then down like fOUR CUPS then think hes having a heartattack my heart 😭😭

atsumu  ... thinks he can handle alot of coffee, but is def another one who will start to hallucinate

futakuchi  ... i have no explanation for this sorry guys

yamaguchi  ... its too bitter for him.  doesn't even like it.   eventually likes it when he’s older but w lots of sugar

goshiki ... very self explanatory. it’s too bitter. he tried once, bless him, bc he saw tendou constantly drinking jt but he just can’t bring himself to like it

they need an IV drip of coffee in each arm and one in their leg please they are tIRED: 

AKAASHI ... self explanatory

SUGA ... he’s tired let him take a nap im BEGGING. those kids are his life force but they also suck his life force. he loves them to death

asahi ... i feel like i’m highschool he doesn’t really need it but time skip asahi chugs like 3 cups a night during fashion week

oikawa, ... self explanatory again

kenma ... he probably shouldn’t take it as much as he does because 1) he only drinks the insanely sweet ice coffees and 2) he uses it as a substitue for sleep but kuroo is convinced that kenma will one day bite his fingers off if he doesn't let him have coffee so he begrudgingly allows it

ennoshita ... he is also tired 

tsukkishima ... doesn't wanna deal with anyone's shit

suna ... also doesn't wanna deal with anyone's shit. 

osamu ... doesn't wanna deal with atsumu’s shit in particular 

matsuwaka ... have you seen his eye bags? please daddy baby get some sleep 

TENDOU ... this man inhales that shit bro you cant convince me otherwise

hanikami  .. yeah it just fits tbh.  he hears oikawa speak once and just downs a full cup

semi ... he’s tired of everyone’s ..,,,, everything ?? he needs a nap ok he also gets vv grouchy when he’s jetlagged dont @ me. post time skip he downs a cup or two before he gets off a plane so if there’s any fans on route that stop by he isn’t rude n grouchy to them 🥺🥺

somehow doesn't ever need coffee, they're always awake enough to function (if only barely):

daichi... he had to get used to it, dealing with all of their shit for so long.  

kageyama... somehow drinks milk and is then completely fine?  nobody knows how.  milk literally makes you tired i- downed a pack of strawberry milkshake at a training camp and was physically buzzing from all the fructose

kuroo ... pre time skip this man has never drank a single sip of coffee once in his entire life i guarantee you.  but post time skip??? cEO KUROO???? ........ yeah he still barely drinks it, but hes always got a large ass Starbucks cup on him so everyone fears him, thinking he’ll be cranky without it it was a present from kenma awh .  its actually filled with water or tea of protein shake or something im crying.  like can you just imagine everyone in the office scurrying to get the big ass rooster head-ass boss his cup of morning coffee bc they've seen him with this enormous ass titan of a travel mug everyday and he takes it every morning graciously, only to give it to kenma when/if he drops by through the day.  pls im sCREAMING

shirabu ...  thinks its gross dont ask me why.  i have it drilled in my head that tendou got everyone to drink it but they pretended because they didnt wanna hurt his feelings, and nobody actually liked him.   

ushijima  ... the most self explanatory thing ive ever seen in my life oh my god. he read online once that it has addictive qualities and immediately went d r u g s ? ! ? ! ? ! ? tries his best to stop tendou from his “addiction”. “it’s like heroine, satori. you know, like cocaine. irl make you sick” pls my heart can’t take it

aran  ... i also legit dont have a reason for this just lOOK at him

kita  ... he doesnt need it dude hes fine. dont ask how, he gets a good nights sleep.  literally never needs to pull all-nighters. cute baby awh i love him sm 

aone... i physically mentally? can not  see this man drinking coffee it doesnt work

IWAIZUMI ... honestly i dont know how he does it.  he is a tired man how does he nOT DRINK IT.

[kavitari]

here’s my piece for the @six-gifts-exchanges thingy!!!! its for @bookishbea and the prompt was a chatfic/social media fic so i wrote the queens in a group chat :) i hope you like it !!!! not really sure if it ocunts as a fic but .....

Ex-Wives

all women are queens (Catherine of Aragon)

bouncy hair (Katherine Howard)

bouncy skirt (Anne Boleyn)

gold star (Catherine Parr)

if she breathes she’s a thot (Anna of Cleves)

Jane (Jane Seymour)

26/03/2020

16:43

all women are queens: guys i lost anne

Jane: How did you lose Anne?

Jane: Also who are you?

all women are queens: catherine

Jane: That doesn’t actually narrow it down all too much.

all women are queens: of aragon

Jane: Okay, thank you!

17:18

gold star: Wait Anne’s missing????

bouncy hair: anne,,, my bouncy brethren,,, what is a hair without a skirt,,,

19:22

if she breathes she’s a thot: so annes just straight up Missing huh

bouncy skirt: oh no where is she

bouncy skirt: oh wait

bouncy skirt: im anne

bouncy skirt: dw guys im in the washing machine

bouncy hair: boucny brethren !!!!!!!

gold star: boucny

all women are queens: boucny

if she breathes she’s a thot: buocny

bouncy skirt: BUOCNY

bouncy skirt has changed if she breathes she’s a thot’s nickname to buocny

buocny has changed bouncy skirt’s nickname to washing machine gremlin

bouncy hair: i am the only bouncy left :(

bouncy hair has changed bouncy hair’s nickname to final bounce

washing machine gremlin: IT'S THE FINAL BOUNCE BOUNCE

buocny: DO DO DO DOO

all women are queens: DO DO DO DO DO

Jane: What?

gold star: Jane you ruined it. Are You Happy Now?

27/03/2020

16:14

buocny: guys I just woke uup what’s goin on

buocny: whys catherine on the floor

buocny: and who let jane in the kitchen

buocny: yall know full well she cant cook

buocny: oh look she burnt the toast. what a surprise.

19:23

buocny: yallre just ignoring me huh

buocny: fine then

buocny has changed all women are queens’s nickname to catherine

buocny has changed washing machine gremlin’s nickname to catherine

buocny has changed Jane’s nickname to catherine

buocny has changed buocny’s nickname to catherine

catherine has changed final bounce’s nickname to catherine

catherine has changed gold star’s nickname to Catherine

20:03

catherine: hey how come cathy gets a capital letter ????

catherine: idk screw you

catherine: this,,, is so confusing

catherine: i hate this

Catherine: I also hate this.

Catherine has changed catherine’s nickname to brat

Catherine has changed catherine’s nickname to jane

Catherine has changed catherine’s nickname to anna

Catherine has changed catherine’s nickname to kitty

Catherine has changed Catherine’s nickname to cathy

jane has changed jane’s nickname to Jane

Jane has changed brat’s nickname to anne

Jane: Capital letters are important, everyone! And Cathy, there’s no need to be mean to Anne!

Kitty: boo hiss

anne: no they're ugly

cathy: there are multiple reasons to be mean to anne

kitty: yeah jane think about the Aesthetic

cathy: she ate  my breadm, for one

anne: aesthetic or die

anne: yeah thats fair

catherine: i hate thiis family

anne: thiis

catherine: go to hell

catherine has changed catherine’s nickname to the Best™

catherine has changed anne’s nickname to munchkin

munchkin: jokes on you i like this nickname

the Best™: i can’t win can i

kitty: nope

28/03/2020

02:46

anna: you guys suck

anna: petition for cathy tot ake away name changing priveliges

munchkin: absolutely not

munchkin: also its privileges

munchkin: learn to spell anna

anna: i hate u

munchkin has changed anna’s name to uneducated rug

uneducated rug: really?

munchkin: shut up i’m tired it was the best i could do

uneducated rug: hey yo anne ever heard of this little thing called sleep?? ive heard its magical

uneducated rug: cathy doenst recommend it though

uneducated rug: doenst

uneducated rug: dammit im alone again arent i?

05:42

kitty: camels b like : humps

09:02

munchkin: kitty love what the [redacted] does that mean

cathy: did you really type out [redacted]? 

munchkin: yes no swearing around the baby

cathy: what baby?

munchkin: you. you’re the baby.

munchkin has changed cathy’s nickname to baby

baby has changed munchkin’s nickname to [redacted]

[redacted]: gasp

Chaos Crew

bde (Anna of Cleves)

squishy (Katherine Howard)

tiny gremlin (Anne Boleyn)

28/03/2020

11:22

squishy: sometimes i forget anne is big brain

squishy: and then i find nine pages of detailed prank strategy plans, in both french and enlgihs, and i Remember

bde: enlgihs

squishy: hush

squishy has changed tiny gremlin’s nickname to big brain

big brain: incorrect

big brain: also why did i read that to the tune of big fun

bde: heathers big fun????????????????????????

squishy: THE HOUSE IS OUUUUUURS

big brain: what other big funs are there?

bde: shut up ANNE we arent all big brain ANNE

squishy: ...

squishy: ITS TIME FOR BIG FUN

bde: BIG FUN

big brain: my sexuality is The Heathers

squishy: jsuhsdkga mood

bde: ditto honestly

11:53

bde: wait anne can i

bde: see all these prank plans????

squishy: she took them and hid them :(

squishy: v detailed though

squishy: she had a whole page on what works best without going too far

squishy: Big Brain

bde: b i g brain

squishy: B  I  G

Ex-Wives

[redacted] (Anne Boleyn)

baby (Catherine Parr)

Jane (Jane Seymour)

kitty (Katherine Howard)

the Best™ (Catherine of Aragon)

uneducated rug (Anna of Cleves)

28/03/2020

14:17

[redacted]: i owuld like to take offnesc to cahetrube;s nicmnake

uneducated rug: owuld 

uneducated rug: offnesc 

uneducated rug: cahetrube;s

uneducated rug: nicmnake

[redacted]: >:(

uneducated rug has changed kitty’s nickname to cahetrube;s with a k

the Best™: literally what could you find wrong in my nickname

the Best™: it’s just one (1) fact?

[redacted]: you fool

[redacted]: you Foole

[redacted]: no it isnt

[redacted]: kittys the best

the Best™: i will concede to joint bestness with the small one

uneducated rug: small one ????

the Best™: not you

uneducated rug: oh come on

uneducated rug: the One time being the shortest is good

uneducated rug: and yall pull this???

uneducated rug: annaphobia

[redacted]: sucks to be you i guess

uneducated rug: shut up :(

cahetrube;s with a k: is this was hell is like

the Best™: being in a gc with anne? yes actually

[redacted]: and you know that how exactly

[redacted]: cathbkuegesk what are you not telling us

uneducated rug: anne spell catherine properly challnege

[redacted]: challnege

cahetrube;s with a k: cathbkuegesk sent me

the Best™: this is the bad place

the Best™: kitty come help me make pancakes and sob into the mixture with me

the Best™: we can watch bad romcoms and eat all the ice cream too

cahetrube;s with a k: okay !!!!!!!!!!!!!

[redacted]: can i come?

the Best™: no u suck

[redacted]: :(

the Best™: you make a compelling argument

the Best™: okay fine

the Best™: but hurry up and get down here

the Best™: these pancakes wont make themselves

[theycallmegothboy]

1-100 >:DDDD REVENGE!!!

FELIXXXXXXXXXXXX >:(( 1. Spotify, SoundCloud, or Pandora?  -spotify  2. is your room messy or clean? -it’s pretty messy i guess  3. what color are your eyes? -blue and grey

4. do you like your name? why? -yeah it’s fine 5. what is your relationship status? -single 6. describe your personality in 3 words or less -certified intrusive thot 7. what color hair do you have? -brown and rn it’s red 8. what kind of car do you drive? color? -i dont have a car 9. where do you shop? -hot topic, goodwill, target 10. how would you describe your style? -comfy emo 11. favorite social media account -of mine, probably discord or youtube 12. what size bed do you have? -twin >:(( 13. any siblings? -i have 1.5 brothers  14. if you can live anywhere in the world where would it be? why? -probably vancouver, idk canada seems lit 15. favorite snapchat filter? -i like the one with devil horns and a tail but its cute 16. favorite makeup brand(s) -i dont wear makeup 17. how many times a week do you shower? -i used to shower every day, but i dont do anything that gets me dirty so like maybe 3 times but if i leave the house then i shower 18. favorite tv show? -stranger things 19. shoe size?  -8 or 9 20. how tall are you? -5′6 with shoes >:(( 21. sandals or sneakers? -sneakers wtf 22. do you go to the gym? -lol no 23. describe your dream date -making some pie or something together and then eating the pie and then sitting on some rooftop looking at stars 24. how much money do you have in your wallet at the moment? -quite a bit actually but i’m saving up for a phone lol so soon it will be like maybe 10 dollars lmao 25. what color socks are you wearing? -not wearing socks but the ones i had earlier were white (ankle length) 26. how many pillows do you sleep with? -just one but it sucks 27. do you have a job? what do you do? -NO BUT IM TRYING TO GET A JOB BUT THE FUCKIN PEOPLE THERE ARE GHOSTING ME AND WONT REPLY TO MY EMAILS SO LIKE SBJHBJS 28. how many friends do you have? -like 4 lmao 29. whats the worst thing you have ever done? -idk nothing super bad but i do a lot of small shit that makes me feel guilty when i realize what i did 30. whats your favorite candle scent? -juniper rosewood 31. 3 favorite boy names -leo, clay, charlie 32. 3 favorite girl names -ivy, uh... idk thats all ive got 33. favorite actor? -no clue 34. favorite actress? -no clue 35. who is your celebrity crush? -not a celeb but i’d smash danny phantom 36. favorite movie? -nightmare before christmas or edward scissorhands 37. do you read a lot? whats your favorite book? -no, but my fav book is probably the prince and the pauper? idk 38. money or brains? -CASH MONEYYYY jk probably brains but if your entire personality is being “smart” like fuck off lmao   39. do you have a nickname? what is it? - a bunch of people call me son (see #49, #100), some call me rat, dumdum, goth boy

40.how many times have you been to the hospital? -just once i think when i was birthed. i also went once with my brother cause he kicked some scissors i left out on the floor and it sliced his toe the fuck open and he needed stitches and i watched him get the stitches and almost passed out :/ 41. top 10 favorite songs -please dont make me do this i dont have it in me 42. do you take any medications daily? -yea i take 20mg of vyvanse but i need to get it raised to 30 cause 20 is Not Enough 43. what is your skin type? (oily, dry, etc) -i got some dry fuckin skin yall dont even know 44. what is your biggest fear?  -it depends. the dark is a pretty constant one though 45. how many kids do you want? -like 2 or 3 eventually 46. whats your go to hair style? -in my face, looking stupid 47. what type of house do you live in? (big, small, etc)  -it’s pretty small 48. who is your role model? -i dont fuckin know lmao  49. what was the last compliment you received? - “i belive in you, my son, you’re an amazing human being“ (same friend mentioned in #100, not actually a parent of mine) 50. what was the last text you sent? -”no it’s a raccoon“ YOU GET NO CONTEXT LMAO 51. how old were you when you found out santa wasn’t real? -i dont think i ever hardcore believed in him, maybe i did though i remember sleeping under the tree one christmas eve waiting for him but i was like “oh yeah that makes sense“ i guess 52. what is your dream car?  -i honestly dont give a shit as long as it actually fucking works 53. opinion on smoking? -cigarettes? fuck no that’s nastyyy. weed? that’s fine i guess but wait till you’re like 18.  54. do you go to college? -no. am sophomore n highschool 55. what is your dream job?  -musician/palentologist 56. would you rather live in rural areas or the suburbs?  -fuck the suburbs lmao, but also im tired of rural, so like.. semi urban?? 57. do you take shampoo and conditioner bottles from hotels?  -no but i take the little soaps >:)) 58. do you have freckles?  -yes 59. do you smile for pictures? -awkwardly, yes 60. how many pictures do you have on your phone?  -dont have a phone but i have like 12 on my computer currently. 4 are of me, the rest are of my cat or random shit 61. have you ever peed in the woods?  -yes 62. do you still watch cartoons?  -cartoons these days kinda suck but like if they were good fuck yeah i would like gravity falls can come hang yknow? 63. do you prefer chicken nuggets from Wendy’s or McDonalds? -i had nuggets from mcdonalds today so i guess them? i dont really care 64. Favorite dipping sauce?  -i got sweet and sour but i dont like it that much. that schezuan sauce was great 65. what do you wear to bed?  -wouldnt you like to know? ;))  66. have you ever won a spelling bee?  -NO ive only been in two. the first one i misspelled the word “turmoil“ cause i had never heard it before and the second one i spelled the word “owed“ as “ode“ cause i was thinking like ode to joy and then i felt like a big Fool afterwards :(( 67. what are your hobbies? -lol what hobbies 68. can you draw?  -i am physically able to draw, but not well, no 69 (haha). do you play an instrument? -yeah i play a few 70. what was the last concert you saw?  -i saw Chicago in either georgia or tennessee i cant remember in like 2016 71. tea or coffee? -hot coffee, iced tea. NOT the other way around. (i love both though) 72. Starbucks or Dunkin Donuts? -starbucks 73. do you want to get married? -sure why not 74. what is your crush’s first and last initial? -dont have a crush 75. are you going to change your last name when you get married?  -idk maybe 76. what color looks best on you?  -i dont know but i wear black a lot and that’s pretty dope 77. do you miss anyone right now? -yeah  78. do you sleep with your door open or closed? -closed 79. do you believe in ghosts? -on the fence. not 100% “oh my god look at these gHoSt oRbS i need to sage my house!!!“ but i accept that there’s some things i wont understand about the world and that i have no answers to. i wouldnt be surprised if there are, and i wouldnt be surprised if there aren’t. 80. what is your biggest pet peeve? -whatever my adhd decides i viscerally hate with a firey passion right at that moment  81. last person you called -my brother (the 1 of the 1.5 from #13 and the one who sliced his toe in #40) 82. favorite ice cream flavor?  -chocolate is dope 83. regular oreos or golden oreos?  -regular double stuff. if you say golden, mint, peppermint, or thin oreos i’m gonna have to euthanize you, i dont make the rules.  84. chocolate or rainbow sprinkles? -rainbow cause it’s prettier  85. what shirt are you wearing?  -queen shirt from hot topic 86. what is your phone background? -i didnt get a phone between question 60 and now but my computer one is some mountains with the moon in the background 87. are you outgoing or shy? -really depends on who i’m around 88. do you like it when people play with your hair? -YES FUCK AAAAAAA (this girl played with my hair literally once in middle school and i was like oh shit and i had a crush on her until the end of middle school true story,,, so ashley if you’re out there-) 89. do you like your neighbors? -to the left they’re fine and their dog is nice but idk what happened to the horses so that’s sus but that’s where our cat came from so they can hang  guess, behind me they’re fine but their boys are loud, to the right they’re fine, and even further to the right are the dope neighbors and waaaaaaaaaay far to the right is a llama and he’s dope as hell 90. do you wash your face? at night? in the morning? -whenever the fuck i remember to/have the energy 91. have you ever been high?  -i dont think so but i wouldnt put it past myself 92. have you ever been drunk?  -not that i can remember, no 93. last thing you ate?  -sloppy joe from a can 94. favorite lyrics right now -”not gonna waste my life, cause i’ve been fucked up“ 95. summer or winter?  -fall. fuck you 96. day or night?  -night but i like it when it’s actually night and it doesnt get dark at like 4 fucking pm cause that makes me depressed 97. dark, milk, or white chocolate? -dark is good, milk is fine, white is only suitable for fancy stripes on chocolate covered strawberries 98. favorite month?  -i vibe with september 99. what is your zodiac sign -sagittarius (was almost a scorpio but i was holding out >:))) 100. who was the last person you cried in front of?  -in person, my mom like 6 months ago, on a discord call, my friend (i love you by the way, you’re the best,,, i dont think he has tumblr but im just putting it out there) like a month or so ago. i hate crying in front of people, i turn into such a hyperventilating snot monster which is not suitable for human gaze and thats the real tea :/

felix this took like 2 hours of my life i will never get back i hate you and i hope you’re happy with what you’ve done <3 <3

also anyone who wants to stalk me, enjoy this information that im handing to you on a silver platter :)) <3

[mothmansrevolt]

LU Girl Scout AU (and subsequent PTA AU)

LU au where they have to pretend to be girl scouts because Time has to prove a point to the pta board and to the Karen Squad Its basically a bunch of highschoolers and singular college student pretending to be girl scouts because of both friendship and Time just shoved some sashes in their hands and said Y'all are all now girlscouts and offered to get them Chipotle as payment.

Twilight is in college(online). Warriors in a senior. Legend and Sky are juniors. Hyrule and Wild are sophmores. Four and wind are freshmen. Four is homeschooled by his grandfather though.   All are in a specila branch called hylia scouts (creative i know). This means they get set uniforms and competitions with other troops over cookie selling boundaries since hylia scout troops are usually very close to eachother. There are two troops in their area including them. Troop 4296 (the Links) and 6669 (the Karen Squad) They are troop 4296 because Time wouldnt let them have either 420 or 6969

Time--a pta mom--rivals with the Karens--tired as all hell but will not hesitate to prank the karens--troop leader and/or chaperone depending on the situation--He has a million bumper stickers supporting his "girls"--honestly he's just here for the cookies--someone get this man a coffee--has two sons according to the law, but has eight in spirit--you mess with his children he will not hesitate to murder you--all his sons are arsonists and he doesn't understand why--will call the links his "daughters". half the town can't tell what children he actually has--loves coupons and discounts "Malon said I'm not allowed to start fights at the pta meetings but I will not hesitate drag her here if you insult my beautiful brats again." Twilight­--Time's eldest son--only in this because he doesn't want his friends to get hurt and he loves his parents--a good boy--loves animals and will not hesitate to educate you on them--he wears overalls and if forced will wear a skirt over the overalls--he cant sell cookies for shit because nobody believes that he is a girlscout--sometimes has to duck down behind Four if certain people are around because they'll get suspicious--it does not work--He pretends to be everyone's big brother and they love him for it--perpetually confused by Wolfie "I have command over an army of teenagers and goats, nothing can stop me but gas money and my gpa." Wild--Time's second son--can pass as a girl pretty well--he destroys stuff during craft time--hot glues patches to sash--He has every one of the cooking patches and than some--Often seen with the camera photographing everything--Will help create new badges--give this boy a scavenger hunt and he will find you just about anything--has a tendency to ride on wild animals--isn't legally allowed to drive a car nor own a license. nobody knows why--second most convincing for this whole thing "This is just a glorified gang and honestly I am living for it." Four--from the neighboring farm but Twilight and Malon babysits him sometimes. he is a staple--the karens keeps trying to steal him because he is 'innocent' and 'a little lady'--this leads to ridiculous hijinks--he is small, quiet, not very mentally sound but he tries his best and is brave as all hell--owns the most badges--will rock the skirt always--fashionista or fashion disaster, there is no in-between--he's the most committed besides legend and warriors but is the most convincing--best cookie seller--Often seen handling sharp tools and knives for some reason, who gave this child a weapon?!--tends to befriend bad people--the only one with the fire safety badge even though, he to, is an arsonist--wears a vest because the sash is too big, Malon made it for him--has a bird named Ezlo who sits on his head "Sorry Miss Karen but I've been bribed with my first born child so kindly fuck off." Legend--salty and sassy--will always rock the skirt--also a fashionista and knows accessories--he's really only in this because of a running bet with warriors--he has a soft on the inside sometimes--he will get into cat fights--The other girlscouts from a rival troop HATE him because they will always lose arguments against him--knows the most about girl scouts, won't say how--Often seen blinged out with the jewelry he wins at the local chuck-se-cheese with his buddy Ravio "I have command over an entire troop of shortstacks and will not hesitate to order a strike against your fucking kneecaps. Do NOT question the authority of this skirt." Warriors--pretty boy--in a bet with Legend--also a fashionista--he is a big brother tho-- protection squad and trying his best--he is on student counsel and is a good leader--stand in when Time is busy--Often seen with a sports bag in one hand and a girl scout sash in the other--all the troops think he is a major lesbian because he keeps flirting with the other scouts--he gets more numbers as a girlscout, not that he could ever admit this "I'm a known lesbian among the girl scouts and honestly that is my crowning achievement." Sky--is here because his friends are here--He is the mom friend--second best at selling cookie because of his sweetness--He often tag teams with Four for selling cookies--is slightly confused but he's here to make sure nobody gets hurt--honestly just naps during meeting-- Often seen with blanket and a comforting hug--rival troops actually have scouts seeking out to befriend him--always forgets his skirt and is often seen borrowing his girlfriend Zelda's "Guys, please stop fighting you are all beautiful young women. Karen, you shut the frick up." Hyrule--the camper and nature boy of the group--he loves and has earned every patch for exploration and camping--tends to get lost--needs navigation patch--its been revoked from him twice--Humble and nice--often sleeps over at other peoples houses--nobody knows where he lives--it confuses the shit out of them--He is buddies with Four because Four knows the backwoods and roads the best--Often not seen due to being lost "Legend duck taped a gps to me arm and I think its lost to :(" Wind--baby boy--not as innocent as the others think--he absolutely loves being a girlscout--will play pranks on the other troops during jamborees and campouts--lives by the sea, slightly far away form everyone else--He helps with the nautical patches--hangs with the resident young delinquents, Tetra's gang. she thinks this is hilarious--he owns the troop wagon that they all use--its named King of the Red Lions or just Dave depending on the hour--only here because Twilight babysits him and his sister--also wears a vest because he thinks its cooler--Often seen with a telescope and covered in sand--someone give this child a bath "My first love may be the sea, but my second is that damned burrito, hand me the fucking skirt!" Wolfie--troop mascot--a giant half wolf half god knows what--has his own vest and patches-- has a tendency to just show up--Nobody knows where he comes from nor where he goes--he is the town cryptid and it isn't uncommon to see him pulling the troop wagon with the boys in it--Four still rides on his back--it counts as the horse back riding patch--Twilight is perpetually confused by him and its become a running gag that Wolfie is his fursona--loves cookies, sadly the cookies do not love him--can vaguely say curse words "arf" Shadow and Dark(I'm not sorry)--in karen's troop 6669 (for fun? for rivalry? who knows. they don't)--brothers--edgy bastards who are in a band together--Shadow is best friends with Four, Dark thinks he's pretty rad--Often seen with Four and the other edgy teens--both sassy, both easily pissed but trying to be kind of nice--Shadow is the only one who has achieved this--no those are not their real names, its Link and Link like everyone else in this goddamned town--HI MY nAME IS ebONY DArknESS DEMENTIA RAveN WAY--Dark is the author of My Immortal--both suck at selling cookies--tag team with Four to try and help their sales--rivals of troop 4296, they despise each other--both wear vests because Shadow wanted to match Four and Dark decided he can trick out the vest "Our mother may be a bitch and a dumbass, but at least we aren't petty white boys." "Wait Dark we are petty white boys" "FUCK" Karen Ganondorf Smith, Kaaren Link Johnson, Carhaen Reese--bitches and pta moms--runs the pta--the karen squad--Reese's daughter named Betghyani who is very nice and likes troop 4296--Johnson is mother of Shadow and Dark--they are fucking nuts y'all--they represent the three evils of the pta: the enforcer, the healthy diet extreme, and the bitch against disabled children (quiet hands!!!)--despite popular belief, Four (Link Smith) is in no way related to Karen Smith (legally at least. Karen thinks they are and it doesn't end pretty sometimes)--they all hate Time with a burning passion because he is not afraid to call them out on their bullshit "I've brought up so many stances and rules into this pta and will not have some farming hooligan upstaging the careful work me and the other heads have created!" Malon--couldn't be on pta because she almost murdered a karen with kindness--sweet and kind but can still kick ass--helped make and fix uniforms--acts as chaperone when needed and finds this all completely hilarious--she makes snacks with Wild for the meetings--has adopted all of these children--actively enforces Wind and Four to eat more because whY ARE ALL YALL SO TINY--can lift a cow "Don't talk to me or my husband or my son or my son or my eight fake sons or my lovely eight fake daughters ever again."

[grenawitka]

I was tagged by @u-okay-hen- thank you! 💛💛

1. What is the color of your hair brush? i had a red one, but it broke. and now im using my parents that is black and purble but i just ordered one that is made of wood and another ne that is light blue. 

2. Name a food you never eat? im very picky with what i eat so the list is long

3. Are you typically too warm or too cold? too warm

4. What were you doing 45 minutes ago? daydreaming about the life ill never have lmao

5. What’s your favorite candy bar? i like a lot of candies

6. Have you ever been to a professional sports game? no, the only other sport i like besides hockey is fútbol (football or soccer), but the fans get a little aggressive after the games, and shockingly enough i wouldnt like to die out there, so no, i havent.

7. what was the last thing you said out loud? ella es tan linda (she’s so sweet) (about my tutor being the nicest person on earth)

8. What is your favorite ice cream? its a bar of chocolate that they made an icecream. its called sahne-nuss and its delicious

9. What was the last thing you had to drink? a glass of coca-cola (coke, whatever you guys call it)

10. Do you like your wallet? yeah, i guess. its plain black, i like black.

11. What was the last thing you ate? a banana

12. Did you buy any new clothing last week? i bought a corey perry jersey, because hes my king👑

13. What’s the last sporting event you watched? stars winning game 5. lets go for game 6 tonight!!

14. What is your favorite flavor of popcorn? sweet

15. Who was the last person you sent a text to? nh-ell! shouout to my girls💖

16. Ever go camping? not technically. every summer, me and my cousins set a tent in my backyard and we spent the night but i dont think the world would count it as camping, even tho we totally do lol.

17. Do you take your vitamins? im not exactly trilled with the idea of living so why try and be healthy to make it longer 😌😌

18. Do you regularly attend a place of worship? no

19. Do you have a tan? nope, we just got rid of winter here.

20. Do you prefer chinese or pizza? ive never had chinese food, and pizza is the best invention EVER

21. Do you drink soda through straws? not really but i actually like drinking from straws. reusable ones - LETS SAVE THE PLANET YALL

22. What color socks do you usually wear? i was just gifted a huge amount of socks of all colors and i am living my best life right now

23. Do you ever drive above the speed limit? i can barely drive

24. What terrifies you? losing the people i love, but i guess we all fear that

25. Look to your left, what do you see? my wallet, which reminds me i owe my dad money for buying me the corey perry jersey

26. What chore do you hate the most? i hate aking my bed but i love when my bed is made. i guess is the price to pay.

27. What do you think when you hear an australian accent? i think about a movie where a group of friends go into the middle of nowhere in australia and when they go back to their homes the world was at war. i cant remember the name of the movie, it wasnt good either, but the trauma of that happening stayed with me. also chris hemsworth. 

28. What’s your favorite soda? coca-cola. i think americans call it coke. nothing better than something that kills your liver

29. Do you ever go in a fast food place or just hit the drive thru? drive thru arent very popular in my country. i mean, they exist but we usually dont use them.fast food places are where is at

30. What’s your favorite number? 27

31. Who’s the last person you talked to? my mom

32. Favorite cut of beef? whatever is eatable, idk. i just eat it

33. last song you listened to? punto y aparte by morat 🎼

34. Last book you read? guys, i dont read, stop asking me this 🙃

35. Favorite day of the week? friday’s but only at night because i have classes in the morning. friday’s are ussually family day - we all gather and we dance, drink, sing and do something stupid. i love my family.

36. Can you say the alphabet backwards? if im drunk enough i can do whatever 💯

37. How do you like your coffee? i dont drink coffe

38. Favorite pair of shoes? i just bought a pair of brown boots, and theyre so fluffy and warm and pretty, but dont wear them because im in lockdown :(

39. Time you normally get up? 8:00am, but only because i have classes either way it would probably be at 1pm. i love my sleep😌

40. Do you prefer sunrise or sunset? sunset

41. Describe your kitchen plates? a have a few that are plain white, others have an organge adge, others have flowers, others have blue and red stripes. i own a lot of plates

42. How many blankets are on your bed? 4, we just reached spring in my country, so its still a little bit chilly down here in chile

43. Describe your kitchen at the moment? white, with a table... i dont know how to describe places, sorry😅

44. Do you have a favorite alcoholic drink? i change favorite drink, like i change socks but right now im really into diaquiris. also, i like making my own drinks.

45. Do you play cards? yes, tho i just know how to play a few type of games. i usually play with my family

46. What color is your car? my parents have a car and its black👍🏻

47. Can you change a tire? kinda. i struggle a little but yeah i can do it.

48. Favorite state? new york - its my dream place (i love cities. oh to ignore everyone!), tho im poor and i could never afford to live there 🙃

49. Favorite job you’ve had? i’ve never worked before

50. tagging: tagging people gives me anxiety because i think they may not like it and therefore won’t like me, and today sucks so i won’t do it (unless anybody wants to)

[heycreehere]

MORE OUT OF CONTEXT HIGHSCHOOL THINGS

"I just melted part of my alarm clock"

apparently theres a girl at my school named Athena and she has blue hair and I feel like that fits a vibe

"I was at church and everyone else was like hot but me" "take it back or ill punch you harder than before"

"what starts with o and ends in e"

"yall I'm tired. I had 19 hours of sleep and I'm still tired."

"cant stop the feeeeeeeeling" "what's that from??"

"I lost my phone... did you take my- *flips book over and phone is there*-oh"

"the baby is still in the sack" "take him out of it before it suffercates"

"I want pet kangaroo" "you want a pet from peru??"

"I should be studying but I'm really just holding my pee"

"I'm so afraid that old people will just die randomly like in public"

"valentines day can suck my dick"

while running out of a classroom "(boys name that I couldn't hear but it started with J) touched my penis!!"

a student to a teacher that was standing out in the hall "You can meet him on your own time. not during my class time. you're wasting our valuable class time for this shit. let's go"

"My version of flirting is 'hE-hey you have a nice FACE' *awkward smile*"

"keep talking shit and I'll feed you to the goose"

I watched a kid hump another kids car and then try to climb in the window

"do yall sniff you fingers after you finish fingering someone??? is that just something I do???" "nah bro I do that too"

a girl asked me to help her cheat on the sociology quiz and when I did she was all "I'm about to buy you food for this girl you saved me"

I was just minding my business in 1st, drinking coffee and I hear the monsters inc theme just play really loudly out of this kids headphones

pretty sure it's a song but this kid walked past in a deadpanned voice "I'm a f*ggot. fuck me in a tesla"

"Someone smells like guacamole"

"I'm a goofball. just kidding. dont ever call me that"

my boyfriend texted me this "bitsko just asked someone if they knew the difference between balls and a wiener and I’m so confused"

The kid that stares at me just stood quietly behind me as I blocked his way into the classroom waiting for my wife to come out and my boyfriend was like "AUTUMN you're blocking the DOOR"

"I'm watching phineas and ferb boiiii"

"gushers are just fruit flavored zits"

"ketchup looks like blood"

"Kick her asssss dont let her take the chairssss"

"it's like shes never seen flying aluminium before"

"you need medication!" "you need to get LAID!!"

"I WILL MAKE YOUR TITS HARD"

"what the fuck is a virginia"

"Do you put a condom on the dildo??? that's the real question"

"I feel like Nate is the monkey that the first guy that had aids fucked"

"I fucked your moms car"

"why must you take a bath in my hand sanitizer?" "I... I was laying on the floor"

one of the kids that plays minecraft in my 6th sits behind me now which is really upsetting because now I can't watch him play anymore

[clown-bait]

Release

I wrote this kinda self indulgent smutty drabble yesterday and forgot to post it. So here is some fresh Pennywise x reader stuff hope yall like.

You know he’ll be upset. You slid out of his embrace this morning like precious water slipping through fingers. He glared at you as you left him with a single molten yellow eye as bright as the fires of hades. You knew that look and you knew you were taking something precious away from him. You told him to get over it, you told him you absolutely could not play hookie for him on your first day of your new job. But this was Pennywise. The godlike being was either perpetually horrifying or a spoiled child, sometimes both on a bad day. And still you loved him more than you had ever or will ever love a human partner. Based on the look he gave you when you ignored his demanding "Stay." to go shower, you might say he was on the same page. You tell him he needs to find a hobby and he snarls grumbles like a cranky child. When you kissed your mate goodbye you knew, he was upset today.

You got home and collapsed on your couch feet too sore to walk on. Your groceries could survive sitting in the bag for a little while longer. You were hungry so you pulled out the mediocre grocery store sushi you had bought for dinner and scarfed that down. And that's when you realize your mate had not come running to greet you. Even if you left him for a couple of hours to run and errand the clingy eldritch would rush you before you even got your foot through the door.  Maybe it he was still angry. You told him to suck it up this morning when he was being particularly pushy had you gone too far? Things were quiet but they were calm and relaxed not a single eerie feeling of being watched hung in the air. And that bothered you. The familiar feelings of self doubt and anxiety began to stew inside your brain. You could beat the bad thoughts away all you wanted but they still festered in the back of your mind. You're tired you hurt and now your head is sick. "Go to bed" you tell yourself as you lazily shove your groceries in the fridge, not even taking out the chips and shampoo. You drag yourself to your bed the lingering smell of circus taints the sheets and the fluffiest and nicest of your pillows. He insisted on getting that one as his and that thought makes you smile. You strip down to nothing,  too exhausted to put on PJs, and you slide under your cozy down feather comforter. You're sad before you drift off.

On the cusp of sleep you are startled by loud heavy steps. The owners feet must be massive as they leisurely drag into your room. You wonder if this is that sleep paralysis thing you've heard so much about until the weight of your bed dips drastically and you're manhandled backwards by long vine like limbs trapping you like an octopus. His tongue, wet and slime covered, drags over your neck, your cheeks, your lips. Your clown begins his ritual grooming of you that he usually only saves for after a rough and harsh fucking.

"Pennywise where were you?" You mumble and turn to face him.

"Work." he grunts and you finally notice how disheveled he is. His normally perfectly coiffed hair hung loose and frazzled his eyes bore bags  more intense than usual and his right rib cage had a nasty bruise that you don't doubt was once a fatal injury by human standards. You noticed his suit and ruff were gone too which he only removed if he needed to form new ones.

"Tough crowd today?" You ask him feeling endeared that he went out hunting instead of bothering you. Sometimes he really is capable of listening.

Your clown grunts and continues to lick. "Didn't ruin my grand finale." He said with his tongue out. His hands are now pressing soothing circles deep into your sore muscles and that feeling of his clay mask textured skin pressed so tightly against your own was a welcome relief. "You smell different. I don't like it." He pouted baring his fangs "And you look like you fell off a building. When I said get a hobby I didn't mean get yourself killed."

He snorts with amusement "As if my prey could ever actually harm me my dear."

"What'd you go after an entire high school football team?"

"Only the one!" He bounces to life cheery as ever and you laugh the bad thoughts sizzle out of your mind leaving ashes. "Alright you've guilted me enough turn around" You sigh and you swing your leg over his slender hips as he does so excitedly. Your hands run up over the back of his marble torso and he lets out a deep pleasured groan as you start to massage him. "Pennywise just didn't know what to do with himself all day long!" He began to chatter trying to get sympathy like a begging puppy. "Had to find other means of entertainment." You can hear the smile in his voice and your hands stop. That shithead. You touch the right side where his big supposed injury was and he doesn't even flinch.

"Oh my god." Your hands leave him completely. "You little shit!" You growl and he flips over with the look of a kid who's hand was caught in the cookie jar. His shit eating grin grows on his lips and it tells you everything you need to know. He's still upset and now you are too. You feel a claw on your ass and you snatch his hands holding them over his head "and what are you going to do about it tiny thing." He growls. "Left me aaaalll alone today! Think I'd let you get away with a stunt like that hmm?" You feel the slime covered thing that served as his cock caress your ass. His claws dig into your hands and you let go in pain seconds later he's got you by the throat and has pulled you down onto his lips as his talons rake into your ass and hips. You're furious at him for a stunt like this and you grab his throat back. You try squeezing but you can't he's made out of steel and he laughs "Harder!" Like its a fucking game to him. So you decide to play his way. You growl in his face and bite him, hard. The moan he lets out is obscene and he grips your ass like its his personal stress ball. You come up for air and his blood is running up your lips and yours down his hands. That is when you crash together like two freight trains. His feverish kisses give away his desperation for you and the way his alien cock has been sliding back and forth between your cunt lips you'd be lying if you said you hadn't missed him all day yourself. His mouth is all over your top half you cant tell which spots are going to have hickies and which are gonna leave a mark into next week. He pushes you up and away from him abruptly and grabs your hips grinding you down back and forth over his curling cock. It pressed upward into your pussy with each rock like an arching cat trying to get the most out of being stroked. He still looks disheveled but you know its real this time and his eyes ooze pure want and lust as he looks at your sweaty post work body. He doesn't care your perfect makeup has melted or your hair is a mess. His queen doesn't need to look regal to get him off and messy is one of his favorite looks on you. He slides you back and forth for what seems like torture until one particular long rock pushes your hips up, up and up then downward onto his slick and throbbing cock. He fills you like you were made to sheath him, and you know the look on your face as he did was as depraved as the sound that left your mouth. He swats your ass hastily and you buck in surprise making him growl in pleasure "Move!" He commands as he does it again "More!" His voice is haggard and needy you try to use opportunity to piss him off one last time "say please." You groan giving away your own want for him. He snarls and sharply thrusts from the bottom reminding you who holds the reins at the moment. "Please." He sneers and does it again, this time you let out a whimpery moan. "You can have more if you do as I say. Move."

And you do, god you do. You start to ride him rocking your hips into your bouncing encouraging that perfect alien appendage of his to curl and press inside you. He tosses his head back with a groan of pleasure guiding your hips into that dipping motion. His fangs are out and you know he's enjoying himself his breathing coming from his panting lips like steam. You moan like a whore for him you can't help it when he knows you literally inside and out. Your clown lets out a horrible snarl and he grips your hips harshly using you like a fleshlight. Not that you're complaining at all, you could never ride him this fast and that release is quickly on the horizon. Pennywise's moans are now deep and monstrous, he's lost in you. His feisty mate, his queen. He growls loud and hits that sweet spot within you hard which sends your orgasming his name in a voice you're pretty sure you've never made before. Your body trembles all the way to your toes and he pulls you down against him holding you by the neck with his teeth while still thrusting hard. He snarls and warmth floods your insides with what you couldn't hold racing up your scratched rear. You lay there panting in a heap more exhausted than you've felt in a while. Pennywise's soft lips on your forehead bring you back to earth and you look at your mate. He gives you a hazy smirky grin that's mostly buck teeth and drool. "Missed ya!" He giggles and you grab his cheeks forcing him to endure nuzzles and kisses. Not that he actually minds.

[askthetotallynotcampcamp]

field trip to didney

Ava: as yes of course

-----------

Max: *sleeping* (him, david and jasper live in a house-)

Jasper: *vibing* M A X

Max: ugh whatttt *rolls over on his bed*

David: *humming a surprisingly happier tune than normal, how is this even possible??* Big day today!!

Max: if you take us on a nature walk one more time dad-

Jasper: It’s going to be way more fun than that!! If that’s even possible, that is-

David: mhm! as much as I love nature walks, this is probably going to be even better!!

Max: and we need....suitcases? *gets out of bed*

Jasper: We need to be out of the house by, uh, what time is it right now? 6? We need to leave by 6:30-! So hurry up and get ready!!

David: dont worry, we'll make it! it could get could outside, so bring a sweatshirt!! I'll go start the bus *goes off to find the keys to the bus and trail mix*

Max: *super tired* ugh okayyyy

-after he packs stuff-

Max: *gets on the bus with mr honeynuts*

Jasper: *lmao sits on the bus or smth* Woo this is so EXCITING

David: Okay, we just gotta pick up everyone else and well be on our way!! Is everyone buckled in?

Max: *is just chilling on the window seat* dad, this bus doesnt have any since it's like a house but I'll just say yes- WAIT THE WHOLE GOD DAMN CAMP?

Jasper: We can’t leave anyone out!

David: Exactly, what your dad said!! first we're gonna pick up Neil, of course, and we'll go from there! *starts the bus* Anyone want some trail mix?

Max: dang I havent seen any of them since summer- and no dad *eats fruit snacks*

Jasper: Don’t eat too many fruit snacks, that’s unhealthy for you

David: we're here!

Max: time to do my job, I'll knock *runs off the bus and onto Neil's porch and knocks*

Carl: *opens door* Hello?

Max: oh uh- hey Carl, is Neil ready? Hes the first to be picked up-

Carl: Ah yes, got it. Neil!

Neil: *approaches* Hello?

Max: wassup dude! Are you all ready- my dads are in the car *puts his arms around his buddy pal Neil*

Neil: Oh yeah! Let me get my stuff, hold on

Max: okay, not like I care!- *pretend angy and walks to the bus*

Neil: *grasps stuff and goes to bus time*

Max: *plops on one of the beds in the back and waits for his buddy pal*

Neil: *plops next to max*

Jasper: Hello Neil!

Neil: uh, hi

David: Goooooood morning neil! Are you ready to go on the adventure of your life!

Max: dad please-

Neil: *awkward silence oop*

Jasper: Alright let’s go get the others!!

Max: sorry about David, I guess where hes taking us is "exciting" but takes over 24 hours to get there-

Neil: Huh? Oh, I know where we’re going

Max: they told you? Ugh why cant I know

Jasper: Neil don’t spoil the surprise for Max!!!

Neil: Oh I won’t

David: max will be happy for once! Oh I'm so excited!!

Max: this is shit! I should be able to know *crosses his arms*

Jasper: Language! You’ll know when we get there!

Neil: Yeah MAX

Max: in 24 hourssssssssss *lies across thy Neil in the most dramatic way possible*

Bus: *beep beep gather children*

Nerris: *walks on the bus* awe I knew they would end up together! He fell asleep on you Neil, how cute

Preston: ah! Best Romeo and juliet ever!

Jasper: Children do not wake up Max if he is sleeping! We had to wake him up very early for this

Neil: *is mr honeynuts*

Max: *wraps his arms around thy neil bc sleep*

Nerris: aweeeeeee

Preston: oh my goodness so cute!

Neil: *mr honeyNUTS*

David: kids just leave them alone and let them have their little snuggle fest, awe so cute- anyways! *parks the car at a rest stop* anyone hungry or need to use the bathroom?

Nurf: i needs to peepee

David: ooooookay then! I'm going to go get some McDonald's so, let's go Nurf!

Max: *still sleeping bc his weird dads woke him up at 6 am*

Jasper: Get chicken tendies or I am divorcing

Neil: well, this is uh, g gay

Max: *awakenand realizes what's going on* what the hell? *sits up and is embarrassed bc hes max* that's gay, AND IM N O T GAY

David: okay honey!

Neil: Oh- hi max

Max: why didnt you move me or something?

Literally all the campers: *looking*

Neil: well your dad told me not to wake you up-

Max: *gets up and walks over to his papa* dad, what did I do to neil? Was it that embarrassing you couldn't wake me up?

Jasper: Hey, calm down kiddo- you fell asleep and you needed sleep and Neil was just- there

Nerris: it was really cute-

Max: SHUT UP NERRIS

Jasper: Language!

Neil: It really was-

Max: that's not bad language!- wait what Neil-

Neil: Oh, uh, nothing

Max: *red boy* you agreed with Nerris-

Nerris: see harrison, I'm a match maker! That's better than your magic!

David: I'm back! Here are you chicken tenders sweetie *gives them to the jasp* let's get this show on the road! *turns on the heater and starts the bus*

Neil: *not vibing*

Jasper: *is vibing with chicken tendies*

Max: *smirks* you like me, dontcha Neil

Neil: What? No, ew, never

Nikki: pft please I know love when I see it!

Max: *crosses his arms and smirks at neil*

Neil: What? Shut up!

Nikki: aweeeee

Max: jesus christ Neil you look like a god damn tomato

David: language!

Neil: Just shut up!

Max: okay no need to be so feisty

Jasper: we’re getting closer wOOO

Max: sits on the couch and takes out his Nintendo switch and plays animal crossing*

Nikki: *goes up to Neil* so, when ya gonna make your move?

Neil: Make what? I’m not going to do anything!

Nikki: awe c'mon Neil look at him! Go sit with him! Make your move!

Neil: What? Why? What’s the point?

Nikki: he probably likes you too!

Max: likes who?

Neil: Nononono! Nobody! I like nobody leave me alone! *neils away*

David: leave Neil alone guys

Max: *genuinely concerned* sorry neil-

Neil: Just go away! I wanna be alone right now *angree neil*

Max: um okay *sits on the couch again*

Jasper: *approaches max lmao* What’s happening? Is something wrong?

Max: well I guess Neil likes someone and I was annoying him and hes pissed

Jasper: Watch your language- also, did you consider that he maybe likes you and he’s being defensive because he likes you?

Max: what! He doesnt! Hes like, my best friend!

Jasper: Okay but he started getting defensive when you fell asleep on him so I’m just saying

Max: *red boy* I uh- no he didnt! *crosses his arms*

Jasper: Oh really? I saw the whole thing and it seems like I’m right homie

Max: looks over at neil then back at his papa* HOLY SHIT YOURE RIGHT

Jasper: Don’t say bad words!

Max: *whispers* dad I think I like boys too

Jasper: oh wow i wonder who you got that trait from

Max: literally both of you!

Jasper: Yeah I know dumdum

Max: yall are g a y

Jasper: Why don’t you go try to like, calm him down or something instead of talking about who in this bus is gay

Max: *knocks on Neil's curtain that covers his room cot thing??* Hey dude, can we uh- talk?

Neil: About what?

Max: about what happened dingus

Neil: Fine.

Max: *sits on his bed* I'm sorry dude. I didnt mean for you to get pissed off or anything-

Neil: It’s fine, Nikki made me frustrated I guess

Max: *kisses his cheek* that never happened!

Neil: *oraneg* *red* I- WHAT??

Max: jesus christ you're so difficult neil *kisses thy neil*

Neil: *crimson*

-when they all have to s leep-

Max: DAVID WE'RE GOING TO FKING DISNEYWORLD?!

Time: it is now 6 pm when they get there

Jasper: WE ARRIVED

Max: YAY! *grabs his stuff and gets off the bus*

The rest of the campers: *get off the bus*

-when they get to their room-

Max: *throws his stuff on to his bed*

Jasper: *bursts in* We’re all going swimming woooo *throws floaties*

Max: ugh fineeeee *changes into swim shorts and walks down to the pool* sup losers

Jasper: Max! Don’t call others losers that hurts their feelings

Harrison: *loses pants cutely*

Max: pft whatever

David: max! You dont have your floaties on!

Nerris: you suck Harrison!

Jasper: Max! You might drown!!

Harrison: *pees*

David: gosh dang Harrison how many times!

Harrison: I COULDNT HOLD IT IN

Nerris: *literally laughing way too hard* HARRISON HOW ARE YOU SO STUPID

David: *walks over to harrison and gives him a towel and whispers to him* put you pants back on-

Harrison: I don’t know where they went!!

Jasper: hooey *>:(*

David: Nerris, since Harrison is your dearest most bestest friend, help him look for his shorts-

Nerris: what the hell! Why me!! I dont want to see his small thing!

Jasper: Nerris don’t talk back to David!

Harrison: twerking is fun

[letstalksymphogear]

Symphogear, EP.7 (Cont.)

“i have not now, nor ever, liked this creepy ass church elevator.”

“kanade please get out of my head, just because im hungry doesnt mean you have to tell me every time i am”

Hibiki finishes getting a full body X-ray. She’s fine.

“that anime protagonist immunity is really kicking in well!”

“by the way, your wife is here! and she’s looking mighty miffed., as opposed to me, mighty milfed.”

“you dont strike me as a mother figure but ill play along for now”

“i just hope miku’s okay...”

“oh, she’ll be fine! see, i’ve seen these kinds of plots before. big secret revealed, another lover is shown, the victim watches as they’re thoroughly cheated on, and they get to lik-”

“please stop breathing”

Genjuro’s wasting away again in Margaritaville. Looking for some daughter to adopt. SOME PEOPLE SAY THAT THERE’S A, WOOOOMAAAAAN TO BLAAAAAAAAAAME, BUT HE KNOWS

XYLOPHONE RIFF

THAT’S IT’S ALL HIS FAULT

XYLOPHONE RIFF

“i hate it when he gets like this. jimmy buffets not a good look for him.”

“for once you and i agree. seeing the commander sulk like this like a middle aged perma-tourist is genuinely miserable”

“hey homies! im back and i brought some bitches! oh, jesus, why does this place smell like mistakes in miami?”

“its me. im sorry. every time i feel like i failed as a dad, my anti-dad energies manifest. imagine every midlife crisis rolled up into a single ball, smacked into the face for eternity. thats the depth of my pain for failing this girl.”

In a moment of positivity, the friendship between Tsubasa and Hibiki is cemented.

> Tsubasa has joined the party.

“FRIENDSHIP!”

“fweindship.”

“uuuuhhhhh... dadship? yeah thats close enough.”

“WE’RE ALL GOOD FRIENDS!”

“ya tiddies are ringing again, better go get it”

Ryoko also points out that Hibiki’s relic is fusing with herself at an alarming rate. This is important to keep in mind.

Meanwhile, at night.

Miku is posing in the motherly “you done fucked up, where have you been young lady” position. A cold scolding is coming.

“.........................hey miku......”

“you can come in. are you worried im gonna bite? you suplexed a car. that shouldn’t be an issue anymore.”

“miku, i.... i wanted to tell you.... but.... the plot wouldn’t let me, miku....”

“should’ve told the plot to fuck off anyway. now you’re gonna live with that. you’re sleeping... on the bottom bunk.”

“b.... b..... b...... b.... b...... bottom bunk...?”

They slept separately that night. God, this is so stupid. All of this is so goddamned stupid. “I’m so mad at you even though you saved my life.” This is just so. AUGH. THIS IS DUMB. KANEKO WRITE BETTER ANGST THAT MAKES SENSE THAT ISN’T THIS.

Meanwhile, far away from this garbage...

Chris, having been evicted from Fine’s McMansion, wanders the streets of mumblemumble aimlessly. Don’t be fooled by her new fancy dress. Basically, she’s a combat-competent hobo.

“no food. no home. no victories. this sucks. whyd you do it, fine? we coulda been great together. but no. ya fired me. now i look like im prancing the red light district with a highly advanced superweapon around my neck.”

“no... hibiki’s to blame. ever since that genderbent little mac showed up to fight me, it’s been all downhill. fine thought me a laughstock because i couldnt take out her oversized boxing gloves, and now she beat me while i had nehushtan. god... i wish i never met that damn hamster faced chubby cheeked nerd.”

“wait, whats that crying”

Chris spies two kids talking to each other, one of them crying. Chris immediately makes an assumption, believing the big bro is bullying his sis.

“hey! stop nicking her lunch money, twerp”

Chris currently is a firm believer of corporeal punishment.

But the sister deflects the blow. Chris can’t even defeat children right now. Truly, this is a record low for her. You know you blew it when even kids are schooling you on basic morality. She then tells the little girl to stop crying, ironically mirroring her brother.

The infamous double T-Pose maneuver. Chris, you might as well get a shovel and start digging your own grave.

“i keep doing bad things badly, and now im doing good things badly... when fine said i was bad... did she just mean im not talented?”

Chris, finally, does a good thing and helps these kids find their parents.

“yeah. hibiki saved a kid when she got her gear. guess what? bam! im saving two! that’s fifty percent more kid per kid saved. take that, weirdo.”

The kids call her out on Chris singing unconsciously, and Chris gets flustered over it. Dawwwwww.

Chris manages to get them to safety to their Dad...

...while brutally lying about it, making Chris look like a predator. There’s a very crushing irony at play here, given who Chris used to serve.

“ugggggggggggggggghhhhhh hes not even gonna payyyyy meeeeeee why the fuck did i dooooo thiiiiiiissssss”

“hey, you know. you kids have a really nice relationship with one another. care to give me tips on how to be an empathetic human being capable of making friends?”

“maybe we’re born with it”

“maybe its maybeline”

“maybeline...”

Meanwhile...

A cold wind blows through Lydian Apartment 69-L. (I don’t actually know if that’s their room number, I just made it up.)

“jesus take the wheel, because i’m jumping out the passenger seat to save this current wreck of a relationship”

“miku please i saved your life, doesnt that count for anything”

“you already killed me the moment you lied. also im taking the bottom bunk so i dont have to see your face coming down the ladder.”

“miku you cant hide in this depression den forever. i know i hurt you and im sorry for it, but please understand i literally couldnt do it. you saw there were punches and violence and stuff... i didnt want you tied to that...”

“what was that? i cant hear your apologies over my incredibly loud snoring. SNOOOOOOORE. SNOOOOOOOORE. SNOOO- fuck, i just swallowed my spit, fuck”

“i hope this cocoon of displeasure you’ve made for yourself lets you erupt into a butterfly of acceptance so i can fly with you again.”

“......thats not fair. you cant say those beautiful metaphors and get away with it. let me be mad... sniff... let me be mad...”

Sadness wafts in the den of lies Hibiki has been forced into.

No music plays. There is only heartbreak, and woe.

In the midst of this pain...

Ryoko loredumps about how the Symphogears work and are immune to the noise on her blog, ‘hornyonmainforscience.org’, her hybrid science journal slash kink zone. It’s mostly a recap with some pretty good soft techno beats in it.

“i made a custom brew of red bull, five hour energy drink, coffee, and cream. i call it gamer girl piss.”

“damn. that’s some good piss.”

She muses about how Hibiki has managed to break the limitations of her Symphogear, making her a totally unique specimen. Wait, where have we heard this before...?

Hey... Ryoko... let’s just... cool it a bit with the Hibiki pictures... come on...

Ryoko touches upon the Custodians and the Curse of Babel. We ain’t touching that shit until later, because that’s another shitfuck box of crazy just ready to jump us in a dark alleyway to rob us of our wits.

Back to Lydian:

“miku whats the answer to the first three multiple choice questions”

“B. A. D.”

“oh, thanks. huh, BAD.”

“yeah. you are.”

“mmm. taste likes dissapointment. just like my life.”

“hey table for two haha get it cause there’s two chairs and miku for the love of god, please, forgive me”

“ive surgically removed my eyes and drew eyelashes over them with sharpie so i dont have to see your bird bangs.”

“thats very rude to both me and my hair. also, wig.”

Even Hibiki’s meal is judging her. Mainly for not eating it. Fucking look at this. God, that looks amazing. Fuck, why did I write this while I was hungry.

“miku you cant do this forever. i might die and youll end up crying on my tombstone going ‘oh god, why, oh god’, and really, i cant live with myself if that happens. mainly because id already be dead by then”

The Anime Janai crew show up to break some icebergs with a goddamn sledgehammer. As the self-aware Gods of this realm, they got very tired of this poor display of angst, and have decided to directly intervene.

Nevermind. They came for her kneecaps, and they most certainly got them.

PLEASE. I’M BEGGING YOU. END THIS GARBAGE PLOT THREAD.

“look. imma lay down the facts. yall are gay. yall are in love. yall are angry for the wrong reasons. its nobody’s fault here but the writer. so please kiss and make up. pretty please.”

“kaneko... you fool... we all know what the original sin is. its your hack writing making this stupidity in the first place. let the pencil go, asshole!”

They bring up the fact that Hibiki isn’t doing her work and wonder if she has a job on the side, which isn’t allowed by the school. Miku gets annoyed and bails, with Hibiki running after her. Unfortunately, Miku runs faster...

“oh god miku not the rooftop whatever you’re thinking just dont do it! please!”

“no. i came here to angst, since this is the Maximum Angst Zone.”

“i..... okay! okay, that’s fair! rooftops are the perfect place to look sad while getting proper air ventilation, thats fine”

It really would have been better played if it was played off that she felt hurt not because of the lie, but because she felt like she could have helped her better having known the truth, and it being a self-loathing sort of scenario for not being there better for her and not fully understanding the risk at play.

But no, instead, we get this.

Absolutely obliterated. A heart ripped, shredded, and sent to the Shadow Realm.

The episode ends on that note, but has a post credit scene.

Naked. On an old timey telephone. On a computer. Wearing stockings and long gloves.

The main antagonist of the series, everybody.

She’s talking the best English possible to some random-ass American when suddenly bursting through the scene is none other than:

“I WANT WORKERS COMPENSATION YOU BITCH, BEFORE I UNIONIZE YOUR NAKED ASS”

“AND I WANT A GOOD REFERNECE FOR MY FUTURE EMPLOYER, AND ALSO A SEVERANCE PACKAGE SINCE I’M FUCKING HOMELESS”

“i paint my eyelashes with mascara made from the tar of freshly carbonated corpses manufactured through noise, what on gods green earth compels you to think id give a rats ass about you?”

“so you never cared, huh! you’re just a nasty naked hedonist trying to- trying to- what the fuck are you even trying to do?!”

“i want to live the dream every spicy little fossil like me yearns for.”

“I WANNA FUCK GOD!”

“how- what? what? how do you even- what? are you- do you want to be the pope? is that it? does the pope get to fuck god? are you- is this a larping thing? you’ve really been into larping lately! i don’t like this!”

“youve never read the old testament, have you. ass out, pussy bare, hips up and barefoot. that’s how god’s always liked it.”

“now get lost, punk. you tipped off my hand to genjuro and now you being here is going to ruin everything. if you still feel any semblance of devotion, eat one of your own bullets and call it a day.”

“it’s 2012 bitch, if the mayans dont get you, I WILL”

“what god gives, He takes away, and so do i. i built you from the ground up. your relic, which was good for jack shit on you. the nehushtan, which you failed to do anything with except zap a couple hundred people. stop wars? you’re a walking war, waged by me, for me. and your cartridge has just run out of bullets.”

“uh oh! hand’s acting up again! better bail before i send you back to smacktown where all the bitter little shittalkers like you strut around spending their lives being useless as hell.”

“ah fuck, im not dealing with no manos: the hands of fate bullshit again”

“and guess what else i got on motherfucker”

“i see the union efforts have officially been busted. understandable, have a nice day ma’am”

“LEAVE.”

“I’M GOING, I’M GOING”

[gratiasancti]

100 PERSONAL QUESTIONS

because @ineffablequestion​ decided to really put my patience to the test today . not that i mind , ily .

1. What is your middle name ?

maria 

2. How old are you ?

23 as of right now !

3. When is your birthday?

oct. 19th

4. What is your zodiac sign?

libra waddup

5. What is your favorite color?

i don’t really have one ? muted colours probably

6. What’s your lucky number?

again, can’t say i have one but maybe 29

7. Do you have any pets?

a dod and a horse

8. Where are you from?

finland / uk

9. How tall are you?

174 cm

10. What shoe size are you?

eu 39-40

11. How many pairs of shoes do you own?

like seven, if you don’t count my collection of riding shoes and boots. oxfords, brogues, wellies, trainers, and the rest are probably heels. as for riding boots, a lot.

12. What was your last dream about?

that i was late from work and got thrown in a tar pit because of it. and then i sold my old history teacher 500€ worth of alcohol and lottery tickets.

13. What talents do you have?

none?? unlimited sarcasm, idk

14. Are you psychic in any way?

i’m not sure if i believe in this stuff

15. Favorite song?

honestly, anything from hippo campus or glass animals.

16. Favorite movie?

the grand budapest hotel

17. Who would be your ideal partner?

someone who counteracts some of my anxiety and excitedness with a calm and, when needed, firm character but is still funny and can be themselves. preferably someone who i feel is my intellectual equal, and we can share everything with each other. maybe a bit older than myself, but not by much. other than that, i really don’t care.

18. Do you want children?

currently, i can’t see myself ever having kids. just doesn’t seem like my thing. especially babies. maybe adopting or fostering could be an option, but only if i was sure i could give the child a good home.

19. Do you want a church wedding?

i don’t think i want to get married

20. Are you religious?

not particularly

21. Have you ever been to the hospital?

maaaaaaany times. multiple riding accidents, broken bones, a car crash. then just being an idiot in general. and chronic back problems.

22. Have you ever got in trouble with the law?

apart from once forgetting to pay for the underground and getting an 80€ fine, no.

23. Have you ever met any celebrities?

i’ve met and had dinner with two different finnish presidents and some other ‘upper class’ people but other than that, no. 

24. Baths or showers?

one of those rain shower things

25. What color socks are you wearing?

i have no socks !!!

26. Have you ever been famous?

uhhhh not in the literal sense of the word but i’ve been infamous at school when i was like 15. made a meme of one of our teachers that went low key viral in our city.

27. Would you like to be a big celebrity?

definitely not in the hollywood sense of things. 

28. What type of music do you like?

a lot of things. anything, really, depending on the time of day and if i’m feeling particularly emo.

29. Have you ever been skinny dipping?

that’s like the only type of swimming finnish people partake in. naked in the sauna, naked in the lake/ocean. so yes, multiple times a year jhdsnhb

30. How many pillows do you sleep with?

currently like five

31. What position do you usually sleep in?

either on my back or on my stomach. depends on what place hurts that day lmao.

32. How big is your house?

closer to 400 m^2 . i still live with my parents but will move into my own flat in six months, once it’s ready. that’s going to be appx 70 m^2.

33. What do you typically have for breakfast?

i know its a bad habit but i often dont have breakfast. if i do it's usually fruit and yoghurt or some toast.

34. Have you ever fired a gun?

yes

35. Have you ever tried archery?

yes. fun fact; my cousin has won the european championchip ( in some form of archery idk ) like twice , i think. 

36. Favorite clean word?

defenestrate

37. Favorite swear word?

fuck. i use it Too Much™

38. What’s the longest you’ve ever gone without sleep?

can’t remember the exact amount of hours but we were sailing and our shifts got messed up to the point where i had either not slept at all or slept so little in like four days i was genuinely hallucinating. almost jumped into the sea because i thought i dropped my life vest,,, which i was wearing.

39. Do you have any scars?

a few. dumbest one probably when i rode in my shorts but used a saddle and rubbed the skin off of my calf. also from hay work, those little dots that look almost like moles.

40. Have you ever had a secret admirer?

not that i know of

41. Are you a good liar?

yes, unfortunately. it’s a bad habit in the sense that i tell a lot of white lies when i could genuinely tell the truth with no consequence. like, it would be the one and the same.

42. Are you a good judge of character?

also yes. i’ve seen some shit. also i have surprisingly good people skills.

43. Can you do any other accents other than your own?

i can speak english in my normal accent which is kind of queen’s english (?) upper class idk, then in world’s english ( so basically no accent / neutral ) and then in finnish (rally) english .  i can also speak swedish with a rikssvenska (standard swedish ???) accent and then finlandssvenska which is finnish swedish (and an actual thing lmao). also i can butcher a norwegian or danish accent in swedish if i really try. my finnish is very neutral, but it does vary a bit depending on what city i’m in.

oh, and also a shitty southern american accent. 

44. Do you have a strong accent?

if i let it shine through, yes, but i tend toward world english because anything else scares finns. but when i speak finnish (which is most of the time) i don’t really have an accent. maybe you can hear that i’m not 100% finnish but that’s about it.

45. What is your favorite accent?

i don’t really have one ! all accents are really fascinating.

46. What is your personality type?

entj-a

47. What is your most expensive piece of clothing?

i have a few expensive dresses, and then of course my riding clothes which cost ridiculous amounts of money because fuck everyone who likes horses, i guess. like excuse me but why is it normalised that you pay over 1000€ for a helmet??? anything less and you’re a peasant.

48. Can you curl your tongue?

mmmmyeah. 

49. Are you an innie or an outie?

innie!

50. Left or right handed?

pretty much ambidextrous, though i prefer to write with my left but do everything else mostly with my right. my handwriting doesn’t differ too much from left to write.

51. Are you scared of spiders?

yes. ew. and we’re lucky to only have tiny ones in finland !

52. Favorite food?

ummmmm. currently carelian pie maybe?? idk such a good snack.

53. Favorite foreign food?

squints??? sushi????

54. Are you a clean or messy person?

depends. often too lazy to clean but incredibly stressed and uncomfortable when its messy. meticulous about all the wrong things.

55. Most used phrase?

either some form of keysmash or “FUCK”. also in finnish either “voi jumalauta” or “voi saatana” which both basically translate to “jesus fucking christ”.

56. Most used word?

also fuck. this really must say something about me smdh.

57. How long does it take for you to get ready?

really depends. sometimes 10 minutes, sometimes two hours. on a normal day w/ shower and moderate make up, 15-25 minutes.

58. Do you have much of an ego?

depends really. i hope i don’t!

59. Do you suck or bite lollipops?

whomst the FUCK bites lollipops ?!?!?!

60. Do you talk to yourself?

i’ve only recently started. it’s terrifying.

61. Do you sing to yourself?

when driving if i’m listening to music, yeah

62. Are you a good singer?

honestly, no clue. i don’t really sing in front of people so i haven’t gotten opinions.

63. Biggest Fear?

failure.

64. Are you a gossip?

not about my friends, ever. but i will definitely listen to any tea you want to spill.

65. Best dramatic movie you’ve seen?

idk does kingsman count as dramatic?? the first one was hilarious.

66. Do you like long or short hair?

both have their perks!

67. Can you name all 50 states of America?

LMAO i can name like 3 if i really try.

68. Favorite school subject?

history, english lang & lit, economics.

69. Extrovert or Introvert?

extrovert but i get tired easily

70. Have you ever been scuba diving?

yes ! we go to the maldives once in a while, because finland doesn’t offer much in terms of diving sites.

71. What makes you nervous?

not a lot of things? i guess some responsibilities. things left for me to do even if someone else was supposed to do them.

72. Are you scared of the dark?

a dark room ? no. a dark forest at midnight ? hell yess. finnish winter darkness is terrifying simply because its so depressing. seasonal depression is real yall.

73. Do you correct people when they make mistakes?

depends. if it’s a trivial mistake and they haven’t asked to be corrected, no. if it makes me or someone else feel bad or just makes any situation worse, then yes. but never unkindly.

74. Are you ticklish?

YES. ugh

75. Have you ever started a rumor?

no. i can’t recall doing so, at least. but i have participated in spreading them.

76. Have you ever been in a position of authority?

yes. at work a couple of times simply out of necessity and also when i took part in MEP. was committee president twice and president of the general assembly once. though idk if that counts since i was like 17 and its all p much play pretend.

oh! and also when i captain our boat. but again, idk if that counts.

77. Have you ever drank underage?

yeah, ever since i was like 16 :/

78. Have you ever done drugs?

no, and never will. not my thing !!

79. Who was your first real crush?

probably a boy from class. i can’t remember, really. i’ve never been too  ‘romantically inclined’ i  suppose.

80. How many piercings do you have?

just my ears, once.

81. Can you roll your Rs?

almost every r in the finnish language is technically rolled so yeah. i feel bad for those finnish people who cant !! makes everything so hard.

82. How fast can you type?

according to this thing 75 words per minute on my first try, so idk how accurate that is.

83. How fast can you run?

not fast. i  hate running, and am very out of practice. 

84. What color is your hair?

idk ? like, light brown ?

85. What color are your eyes?

again, idk. blue/green/grey

86. What are you allergic to?

dogs, cats, birch, and almost anything that flowers in the spring jshbdsjh

87. Do you keep a journal?

not a journal per se but i have a ‘little black book’ which i keep rather meticulously about my thoughts on the day, important things i need to remember, my expenses etc. a habit inherited from my dad. i’ve gone through like six of these in the past few years.

88. What do your parents do?

my mum is a mayor and my dad is a ceo

89. Do you like your age?

yeah !

90. What makes you angry?

injustice.

91. Do you like your own name?

yes !

92. Have you already thought of baby names, and if so what are they?

ksjdsjhb no. at this rate i’d end up naming a child crowley or sum shit

93. Do you want a boy a girl for a child?

i don’t want kids but if i did gender would be a non issue

94. What are you strengths?

lmao i have good people skills, work well under pressure, get along with everyone, am determined and ?? a good leader??? idk

95. What are your weaknesses?

i take on too much responsibility, i have anxiety and depression, i get frustrated at my own failures, i’m very self-critical and unforgiving. also no self-control when it comes to rp.

96. How did you get your name?

i think somewhere from my dad’s side, not entirely sure.

97. Were your ancestors royalty?

possibly? not sure. but fun fact! a great great grandmother (? or something of the sorts) from my mother’s side actually survived the sinking of the titanic.

98. Do you have any scars?

wasn’t this asked already?

99. Color of your bedspread?

this blue mandala like pattern idk

100. Color of your room?

white and a very mellow blue