#yall could never
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dixonschoppers · 7 months ago
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Fuck tiktok fame, im character.ai famous 😝😝😝
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tinybitofhope · 1 year ago
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yo i wanna share my bday so badly bc its literally the best but like… is that weird????
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cannibalpunk · 2 years ago
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gibbearish · 1 year ago
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love when ppl defend the aggressive monetization of the internet with "what, do you just expect it to be free and them not make a profit???" like. yeah that would be really nice actually i would love that:)! thanks for asking
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mal3vol3nt · 6 months ago
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aang haters are so insane cause you’re literally hating on happiness personified????????
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he is literally just a guy
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who is five apples tall
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and needs his sleep
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iwasntfree · 1 year ago
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humiliated myself hugely in front of the pretty girl i have to sit beside for the rest of the semester. and i'm gritting my teeth and bearing it
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petricorah · 1 year ago
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🍃 couldn't decide on which of jin's hairstyles i liked best so i combined them [id in alt]
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carnivalcarriondiscarded · 1 year ago
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im a simple guy! i think about puppy Barnaby. i promptly explode into bloody heart-shaped confetti
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choccy-milky · 2 months ago
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another batch of MCs as thanks for drawing clora🥹💖💖 once i start working on something i cant rest until i get it done so ive legit been working on these nonstop for the past 2 days from when i wake up till i go to bed.......i can finally rest 🧎‍♀️........THANK YALL AGAIN💖💖💖🙏🙏🙏 MC's in order: @moonstruckmoony @syaolaurant @dwightschrute11 @boxdstars @versailles-black @ccelicaa @ethniee @wrongcog @ashiori-chan @tamayula-hl @celestinawarlock @serpensortiamaxima @silvyadrakkon @jadepalaceyaya @zorro-d-t
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tea-cat-arts · 6 months ago
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Shen Yuan getting transported into pidw isn't "the system punishing him for being a lazy internet hater," but instead representative of "step 1 of the creative process: getting so mad at something you decide to go write your own fucking book" in this essay I will
#svsss#scum villian self saving system#shen qingqiu#shen yuan#the fact that people think scum villain#-a series that examines and criticizes common tropes in fiction-#is somehow against criticism or being a little hater is wild to me#especially since shen qingqiu never gets punished for being a hater#heck- he's still a little hater by the end of the series#he mostly gets punished for treating life like a play and like he and the people around him are characters#(or in other words- he suffers for denying his own wants and emotions and his own sense of empathy)#I think some of y'all underestimate how much writing/art is inspired by creaters being little haters#like example off the top of my head-#the author of Iron Widow has been pretty vocal about the book being inspired by their hatred of Darling in the Franxx#I think my interpretation of Shen Yuan's transmigration is also supported by the fact that this series is an examines writing processes#side note- though i understand why people say Shen Yuan is lazy and think its a valid take it still doesnt sit right with me#i am probably biased because my own experiences with chronic pain and depression and isolation#but ya- i dont think Shen Yuan is lazy so much as he is deeply lonely and feels purposeless after denying parts of himself for 20ish years#like yall remember the online fandom boom from covid right?#being stuck completely alone in bed while feeling like shit for 20 days straight does shit to your brain#the fact that no one came to check on him + he wasn't exactly upset about leaving anyone behind supports the isolation interpretation too#+in the skinner demon arc he describes his life of being a faker/inability to stop being a faker now that he's Shen Qingqiu#as “so bland he's tempted to throw salt on himself” and “all he could do is lay around and wait for death” (<-paraphrasing)#bro wants to be doing stuff but is stuck in paralysis from repeatedly following scrips made by other people#another point on “Shen Yuan isn’t lazy” is just the sheer amount of studying that man does#also he did graduate college- how lazy can he really be#he doesnt know what hes doing but he at least tries to actively train his students#and he actually works on improving his own cultivation + spends quite a bit of time preping the mushroom body thing#+he's experiencing bouts of debilitating chronic pain throughout all this#but ya tldr: Shen Yuan's transmigration is an encouragement to write and not a punishment and also i dont think its fair to call him lazy
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anonymouscheeses · 10 days ago
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My love for ATA is immeasurable
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linipik · 1 year ago
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6000+ years, together
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jadewritesficshere · 5 months ago
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Thinking about Eddie Munson who was complaining to the rest of the band about his shoulders and neck hurting post show. One of them convinces him to go for a massage.
Eddie shows up day of and is told to strip to level of comfort and get under the sheets laying on his back, his masseuse will knock before coming in. Eddie has not an ounce of care or shame, strips completely naked. Scars and tattoos on full display. He climbs between the sheets and waits. After knocking and hearing a "come in", his masseuse enters and-
The most handsome man he's ever seen walks in. A bit of stubble on his defined jaw, soft pale lips Eddie wants to kiss, big brown eyes Eddie wants to get lost in, slutty little waist and an ass Eddie could-
He introduces himself as Steve. Verifies where Eddie had said his tension was on the form he hastily filled out. Then it starts.
And maybe, maybe, Eddie is a bit touch starved. He could have anyone he wants, but they don't want him just his fame. Pushes them all away. Only gets close to his band, but they all are busy and have their own people outside of work.
And Steve is just touching him. Rubbing smooth circles into his temple, down his cheekbones towards his jaw. Pressing on parts of Eddie's face he didn't even realize were tense. It's relaxing.
And Eddie regrets not leaving at least his boxers on to help hide that he's becoming hard. Kind of embarrassing, which makes his dick harder- which, that's a lot to unpack right now-
"Hey, relax man," Steve says, laying a gentle hand on his shoulder. Eddie can see Steve's eyes dart towards the obvious situation," It's natural. Happens to the best of us." "Does it happen to you?" Eddie blurts out. Eddie wants to shove his face in one of these soft plush pillows and scream, but Steve just snorts a laugh and shakes his head at him. Doesn't even respond as he continues the massage.
Eddie tries to hold back his groans as Steve turns his head to the side and rubs his neck into his shoulders. He can feel the tension leave his body slowly. Feel the knots in his muscles release.
Eddie can't, however, hold back the noise he makes when Steve grabs a hold of his hair and tugs it. Eddie's eyes pop open and he stares into Steve's face, who has started blushing. Steve just clears his throat and let's Eddie's hair go before continuing the massage.
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falmerbrook · 2 months ago
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One of the most annoying things you see from tes fans is seeing each race as a unified collective in ways that the games don’t even do. They act like the ways some members of a race act in some places represents all of them everywhere. The biggest and most frustrating version of this is when talking about the way Dunmer are treated in Windhelm, people bring up the in-universe racism in Morrowind. Like, that doesn’t justify the way they're treated in Windhelm at all. You really think Ulfric is doing this for justice for the Khajiit and Argonians (who he won't let in the city)? Even if he was, do you think it's right to enact that "justice" on random refugees and their descendants? We’re talking about different groups of Dunmer. They aren’t a monolith. IN MORROWIND they aren’t a monolith. The head of the anti-slavery organization in Morrowind (the game) is a Dunmer. Every province and race had different cultures and subcultures with folks with different opinions that people like this like to ignore.
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These people act like it's clever to bring this up when in reality it reflects an even shallower interpretation of the worldbuilding imo.
(and that's not even touching on how comments like these reflect the language used in real life discussions of refugee asylum and immigration)
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just-some-random-blogger · 1 year ago
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BESSSSTIEEEE AHHHHHHHHHHH IM SO HAPPY YOU LOVE HIS AASLIHLASHFASFAPS
and yeah he's not very smart or imaginative 😫😔 but it's not his fault hes an oogabooga
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Accidental Targ
Scene II: he kinda looks like my ex boyfriend | Masterlist
Daemon Targaryen x Modern!Reader
Summary: After coming to terms with the fact you were in King's Landing some two thousand years before your birth, you get reunited with your friend and try to manifest your way back to the present. For the meantime, Harwin Strong is your bodyguard.
Word Count: 5k+
Warnings: fem!reader, time travel au, descriptions of reader's hair, incestuous gremlin!daemon, generally gross!daemon, harwin 'big daddy' strong, crackfic, typos, etc.
A/N: Following the events of our mighty poll 😁😁😁😁 im excited to say what won was was always my intention and im glad you lovely readers have synced with me on it BWHWAHA sorrows sorrows prayers
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"Fucking Seven," I sigh and gather my thick skirts, running up to the blue haired girl. The servant who escorted her promptly curtsies then walks away. I release the fabrics to grasp her face. I sigh in relief, "thank the gods you're here, Libby."
"What the fuck are you wearing?" she asks groggily, eyeing my dress.
I shake my head, "fuck, shit, I mean Lilibet."
"And how did you braid your hai-" Libby speaks the same time as me before freezing and raising a finger, "fuck you."
I growl and grab her hand, "no, no, no. Listen to me," I push her hand down, "you remember running through that damned arch?"
Libby wrangles out of my clutch and rather exasperatedly glares at me, "what?"
I release a shudder then grab her face again, "listen to me, Libby!" I sigh, "remember that stupid urban legend?"
Libby's face contorts as she groans. She pushes my hands off her à la 5-year-old tantrum; her blue hair, in turn, flies to her face.
"We crossed that arch," I grab her arms, "and now we're in fucking first century Westeros, Libby," I hiss, pulling her to the bed, "which is why I have to call you Lilibet-"
"Fuck you."
"-and you have to change and cover your hair," I release her to grab the clothing on the sheets, shoving them into her chest.
"What ABOUT my hair!"
I shake my head, "it's a dead giveaw-"
"You're closer to dead. You look like a fucking grandma and you have problems with my hair?!" Libby throws the clothes back on the bed, "listen, I know I got wasted and shit, and I'm sorry, but if you want me to cosplay as a peasant, just say that and get me coffee, please-"
"LIBBY!"
Libby's ear's ring, "bitch, the fu-"
"THERE IS NO COFFEE!" I grab her arms and shake her, "we're being held hostage by Daemon Targaryen and this hair," I manically point to my head, "is our fucking lifeline!"
Libby's face pinches, the initial grogginess in her expression is expelled, "Ok, calm your tits, YN-wannabe. I told you reading fics of him would fuck with your head. Imagine reading fics about King fucking Charles-"
"IT'S NOT THE SAME!"
"WHAT DO YOU MEAN IT'S NOT THE SAME?! IT'S FUCKING WORS-"
"THAT'S NOT THE POINT, LIBBY!"
"HE'S THE COLONIZER OF COLONIZERS!"
"IT'S NOT A FANFIC!" I pinch my fingers together, "THIS IS NOT A FANFIC! I AM telling you we fucking crossed that arch and now we're FUCKING-"
My words cease when a creaking sound of the heavy door fills the room. The both of us turn to the door as it opens. My heart begin to race.
Lo and behold, Daemon Targaryen walks in, one hand on his hilt, eyes looking us both up and down. Libby shifts in her spot as Daemon approaches. Her demeanor immediately changes when she sees him. She straightens up and pushes her hair back, dusting off her hot pink top. Aint no way.
"Do I look good?" Libby mutters to me before Daemon is in front of us. My eyes blow wide and my jaw slacks. Be so fucking for real. She fixes her radioactive blue hair and my upper lip curls in disgust and annoyance.
Libby and Daemon lock gazes; the former smirks, "hey, cutie pie."
I slap my hand to my face. The sound reverberates in the room.
"What is a cutie pie?" Daemon asks stoically.
Libby leans on one leg, "you."
"Seven fucking hells," I quip, roughly dragging my palm down my skin.
Daemon turns to me before tilting his head. He mirrors Libby's stance and his lips faintly curve upward, "in this era, girl, pies are food. What would I have in common with a type of pie?"
Libby lets out an airy chuckle, "you ren fair boys really like roleplay, huh?"
Daemon raises a brow, "I assure you, nothing about me is boyish."
Libby bites her lip and claws the air, "rawr."
I am unable to mask the sound I make. Daemon pulls his head back at Libby's actions.
I grit my teeth and grab her arm; she shakes me off, making sure to giggle as she does this. Daemon chuckles as he turns to me, "I see why you are keen on keeping her."
"You can keep me if you like," she blurts, stepping in front of me to garner his attention. Daemon steps back.
I grab Libby's arm again. This time, with much force that the ends of my hair whip around. I whisper-yell, "you do know that is Daemon Targaryen, right?"
Libby barely turns to me as she mutters, "what?"
"You're flirting with the Daemon Targaryen," I sneer, "first of his name," I lean in and whisper, "manwhore."
Libby looks at me from over her shoulder to me then back to Daemon, "ahhhh. A cosplayer."
"Libby, I swear to g-"
"It's pretty good," she crosses her arms then points, "is that a wig or hair dye?"
Daemon furrows his brows, face contorting at her words.
My eyes widen and suddenly the silver hair on my scalp itches like it doesn't belong to me. Well, see-- it doesn't! Not in a way that counts to the incestuous gremlin!
From the way his composure tightens, I could tell he was no longer amused. I yank Libby back, shooting her a glare, "literally shut the fuck up."
She scowls at my pressed tone, "what? I was just asking-"
"Hair dye?" Daemon blurts way too loud, shutting us both up.
We turn to him as he looks between us. He tilts his head and adjusts his grip on his sword. He straightens his posture. In that moment, his expression was changed dramatically. He reaches out for Libby's hair, inspecting it in his hand. His violet eyes dart to hers, "so, your hair is blue because of dye?"
Fuck.
Fuck, fuck, fuck, shit, fuck.
I grab Libby's hand before she can think of saying some bullshit. She does not move a muscle as I squeeze her palm.
Daemon raises his brows impatiently.
"What?" she mumbles.
I clench my jaw at her ditzy response.
Daemon narrows his eyes, "are you so dimwitted not to understand me the first time?
Fucking fuck. A shiver runs down my spine. Libby raises her brows and turns to me as I stare at Daemon. I blurt, "it is a right of passage for her family."
Daemon eyes me hotly.
I release Libby's hand and scramble to the bed where my clothes were folded into a small sack. I go through my things and pull out my phone, opening my gallery, showing Daemon a photo of Libby and our friends with bright colored hair. I lie, "these are her cousins."
Daemon pulls his head back at the sight of the photo on my phone; it was the exact reaction he had when I showed him a screenshot of the maps of this very place.
Libby blinks rapidly as Daemon comes to my side. The man basically breathes down my neck as he looks a the screen like a boomer. He narrows his eyes and pulls back his chin.
I point to Sandra, who had pink hair, "they do this to... commemorate the war-- of their people."
Daemon looks at Libby again, seemingly expecting more of an explanation. I look at Daemon and begin to panic at the aloof expression Libby held. I place my hand on his arm and rub it gently. Thankfully, he's still a simple man and it seems to diffuse his unbelieving demeanor, "it's hard for her to talk about. It was a war over dye and trading. A lot of her family... were casualties."
Fuck. WELL, real wars have been fought for WAAAY less.
Daemon turns to me, "I find it hard to believe such traditions exist two thousand years from now."
"And yet," I wave my phone, "you could not also believe you were listening to music with me moments ago."
He hums and turns back to Libby. He nods, "well, have her dress," he turns back to me, "I want to break fast with you before the tourney, dragonling."
I nod rapidly. Daemon gives a smile and heads for the door, "you remember your way to the solar?"
"I do."
He eyes Libby as he walks off then turns to me, "very good."
The moment the door closes, Libby explodes, "WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT?!
"WE'RE IN FUCKING FIRST CENTURY WESTEROS," I whisper-yell, "now keep your voice down, you stupid fucking bitch, and change!"
It took me explaining everything that happened in detail as she got in her dress AND getting lost in the fucking castle then actually finding our way to the solar for Libby to believe I wasn't playing the most elaborate prank on her.
And when we got there, a servant informed us that the prince had been summoned by the king and that we should eat by ourselves.
Libby and I sit across each other. We decide to forfeit the fact the food could be poisoned because we were way too hungry not too eat. This blue haired rat, however, couldn't fucking stop saying the food could use salt and pepper. We were mortified when a servant came to us with a mortar of just that.
Before we could even say thank you, she runs off.
I snap at Libby, who scratches her headscarf for the nth time, "do you fucking understand you're a terrifying aristocrat right now?!"
"I'M SORRY!" Libby makes a repentant expression.
"You should be!"
"It's just that everything is fucking boiled and-"
The sound of the door opening ends Libby's yapping. We both snap to see who was entering.
In walks the dark haired man from the night before. Gold cloak, armor, and all. He steps in front of us and bows, "good morn."
"Hubba hubba," Libby tucks imaginary hair behind her ear.
"Fucking," I snap to her, "stop."
I look back at the man trying to remember his name, I can't seem to.
"Wait! Is this the madly good looking guard you were talking about?!" Libby speaks WAY to loud for a conversation between two people across each other.
The man makes a sound as he wipes his lips. My eyes widen and I sink in my chair.
"You clearly have a type," Libby mutters as she unabashedly eyes him. He is undeterred. She tilts her head, "he looks like your ex."
I snap back at her, "w h a t?"
"Or I mean he would look like him," she points her thumb, "if he wasn't so whiny, short, and pathetic," Libby turns to me.
"He literally looks nothing like Jon."
"He does!" she leans in, "dark curls, thick brows!"
I shove a bread roll into her mouth.
"Prince Daemon tasked me to be your chaperone for the day," he says, clutching his hand in front of him.
"I've always wanted a hot bodyguard," Libby smiles and leans back on her chair, "well, don't just stand there," she beckons him, "come join us for breakfast."
I pretend to fix my silver hair as I clear my throat, "breaking fast."
"Breaking fast," Libby corrects with a grin, "and what was your name again, pretty boy?"
I groan as I shove a bread roll into my mouth.
"Harwin Strong, my lady," Harwin mutters with another respectful nod, turning to me, "and please, forgive me for last night's encounter, Lady Gryffindor."
Libby titters and slaps her hand on her mouth.
"If I came off as impertinent or-"
"No, please, sir Strong," I raise a hand to him, "you were doing your job-- I mean your duty. Nothing needs to be forgiven."
"By the way," Libby raises a finger, "I'm Lady Hufflepuff and I would love it if you sat down next to me."
Harwin turns to Libby and I resist the urge to facepalm. My face twitches and I watch as Harwin shifts in his spot. I blurt, "you can call her Lilibet."
"Fuck you," Libby snaps.
I snap back, "well, that is your name, is it not?"
"I'm not entering my nun era."
I make a throaty sound and grab a goblet, "clearly," I take a sip, "but with that getup-"
"Hey!" Libby bangs on the table, "you're the one who made my cunt levels drop with this milkmaid outfit."
Harwin begins to cough.
"What? Like I chose that for you?"
"No," she props her elbow on the table, "but Daemon gave you a city girl-"
"Prince Daemon."
"-outfit and he made me look like your ugly handmaiden."
"Again," I brush my platinum hair out of my face, "that wasn't my choice, Lilibet."
"My ladies-" Harwin interjects, making us both turn to him. He clears his throat and offers pinched smile, "I am honored by the invitation, but I will stand watch out-"
"Oh, don't be rude and just sit down already," Libby presses with a playful look, "there's way more food than the two of us can eat."
And though she was correct, I kick her underneath the table.
Libby yelps and eyes me. I dodge her when she kicks me back.
"I don't think it appropri-"
"Nonsense!" Libby calls, turning back to Harwin as she fails to kick me again, "please, just join us."
"LILIBET!" I whisper-yell.
"UGH!" she turns to me with disgust and whisper-yells back, "stop fucking calling-"
"You do know he could literally be like your great-great-great-great-"
She raises a hand and cuts me off with a guttural groan, "oh miss me with that bullshit! You're LITERALLY a Targaryen!"
"I will wait outside," the man calls, making us turn to him.
Harwin walks off and Libby raises the bowl of bread rolls, "THE BREAD ROLLS ARE ACTUALLY REALLY NICE THOUGH!"
I wipe my face, "Libby, we're going to fucking die."
"Not before I try myself some Harwin Strong."
"SIT BACK DOWN."
"I'M SAT!"
When we finished eating, Harwin escorted us to the arena to watch the tourney.
"Are you married, Harwin? Can I call you Harwin?" Libby asks.
I shoot her a look, "Lilibet."
Libby ignores me. The man we were following keeps walking, not bothering to look back at us, "you may call me whatever you like, my lady."
Libby and I turn to each other with a gasp. No, cause why he playing like that?
"And I am not married," he looks over his shoulder, eyes locking with mine momentarily.
Libby's jaw drops and begins to shake me. She mutters loudly under her breath, "bitch. why he looking at you, and not at me?"
"Probably because you're fucking stupid!" I retort quickly in the same manner, unable to mask my giddy tone.
Harwin clears his throat again as he looks front. Neither of us catch this.
"Libby, be so fucking real though," I grab her arm and whisper, "that's someone's grandpa."
"Yeah, well, today, he's my daddy," she mumbles then bites her lips, as if it could minimize her grin.
Harwin makes a face and whispers under his breath, "daddy?"
When we get to the arena, the sound of the cheering crowds make both of us excited, up until someone screamed in terror and the crowds continued cheering anyway. Harwin gave us spots quite near the front, and the sight of the horses and their long-ass sticks left me feeling uneasy.
Libby shoves into me as she points to the far right. I, in turn, collide into Harwin's bulky armor. Before I can apologize for it, she squeals, "LOOK, IT'S DAEMON!"
"Libby, he's the prince!"
"TAKE A PHOTO! He looks so good!"
I give her a look as I straighten up, "girl, shut the fuck up."
Without another thought, she pulls out her phone from her bosom and wipes the moisture off the screen.
Harwin looks away, eyes wide, pretending he did not just see that happen.
"Stop it! You have no idea how bad this could-"
"Oh, shut up, you showed Daemon your phone!" Libby makes a face.
"THAT'S BECAUSE HE WOULDN'T LET ME GET REUNITED WITH YOU IF I DIDN'T CONVINCE HIM I WAS FROM-."
"Shush," she opens her camera and begins to take photos of Daemon. She shouts his name along with the other spectators and I beg her to at least call him prince.
"What is that contraption," Harwin asks, eyes glued on Libby's cracked screen.
I turn to Harwin, to Libby's phone, back to him, "it's, err... an image capturing... box."
Harwin nods at me though his face is visibly confused. He furrows his brows as Libby switches to front cam and puckers her lips out, "SAY CHEESE, DADDY!"
The color in Harwin's face drains when he sees himself on the screen. I clutch his arm and give him a look, "it's okay. It's not dangerous."
"Will it capture my image?" he mutters and covers his face. He mutters under his breath, "I'd like to keep my face."
Fuck. "N-not like that. It's... it's not black magic."
All the while, Libby is pressing the buttons on her phone, rapidly taking photos no one asked for.
A few people around us begin to mutter to themselves. I find myself looking over my shoulder, catching a bunch of men staring right at us. I eye Libby, nonverbally telling her to quit it. She gives me a look and snaps a few more pics of Daemon before shoving her phone back in her cleavage.
I release a breath when she does, that, and ser Harwin's arm that I did not realize I was still latched on to. I offer a look, "sor- apologies."
He nods, "all is well, my Lady."
And yeah sure, maybe it was. Maybe all was well. Daemon was winning the tournament-- or tourney, I guess; I have no idea what the difference was. I mean I could barely watch because they were fucking gladiator-ing each other, but I knew he was winning because after every crash, came a trumpet and the announcement of it.
So yeah. Maybe it was fine then, in its own sick way, but then Libby pulled me by the arm and said, "I have to take a shit."
"What?"
She gives me a look, "I need to take a shit."
"Libby," my eyes widen.
"I know!" she grabs my shoulders as the crowd cheers over whatever barbaric brawl was happening this time, "you think I want to know what their loos look like?" she shakes me, "am I going to have to shit in a river?"
I wipe my face and turn over to Harwin. His eyes turn from the match to me when I pull at his cloak, "mmm.... Lilibet has to... ... to poop."
Libby slaps my arm. I turn to her, frazzled. She hisses, "he doesn't know what poop is."
"You think I don't know that?!"
"I beg your pardon, my lady?" Harwin shifts to us, his thick brows knitting.
"Yeah, one second," I raise a finger at him, looking back at Libby, "I don't fucking remember the word."
Libby sighs, "Just tell him I need to sh- I NEED TO SH-"
I slap my hand on her mouth, "QUIT IT!"
Libby pushes my hand off, "WHAT?!"
"HE'S NOT GONNA KNOW WHAT THAT-"
"EVERYONE FUCKING KNOWS WHAT TAKING A SH-"
"NO, THERE'S A TERM THAT THEY USE! Think about it! Have you never watched a BBC period drama?!"
"BITCH, YOU KNOW I ONLY WATCH NATIONAL GEOGRAPHIC!"
"OK, THEN THINK OF WHAT DAVID ATTENBOROUGH SAYS WHEN THE ANIMALS ARE POOPI-"
"DO YOU GENUNINELY BELIEVE THEY SHOW FOOTAGE OF ANIMALS POOPING ON TELEVISION?!"
"I DON'T FUCKING KNOW. IN ALL TV HISTORY THERE HAS TO BE AT LEAST ONE TIME WHERE-"
"HARWIN," Libby shoves me to the side and grabs the man, "I HAVE TO SHIT."
Seven father fucking hells. I dig my fingers into the roots of my light hair and to Harwin, whose lips part and brows furrow. He nods, "I will lead you to the privy," he turns to me, "stay here in the meantime."
We both nod. Libby walks to Harwin's and makes a face at me, "they call it a privy on the BBC, do they? Sounds like an office."
"Libby- Just- if push comes to shove, tell him you'll shit in the river."
Libby groans as Harwin leads her off. She shoots me a glare, "I am not shitting in a river with Harwin watching!"
I shriek in shock when there is a loud crashing sound. My hands dart to my ears just as the crowd roars. A loud voice announces the victory of Prince Daemon from House Targaryen.
I drag my hands down my cheek and clutch my chest.
I dare to look at the casualties on the playing grounds, but to my horror, I see something far worse. Daemon's horse is galloping over to me. He rips his helmet off, tosses it, and sighs through a grin. He points his stick to me and loudly calls, "might a fair woman like you reward me something sweet?"
My eyes widen and I feel the entire stadium turn to me. My heart races and my jaw loosens inch by inch.
Daemon shoves his stick to the side and reaches his arms out to me, "a kiss perhaps?"
Rat, I wasn't even watching you play. Why should I reward you for winning a game I didn't watch?
I cannot help the sound that leaves me when the other audience members begin to spur me on and nudge me. Fuck. I hate peer pressure. I walk towards the railing and eye Daemon as if I had laser vision.
"I CANNOT REACH YOU!" I scream back, momentarily shocked by the ferocity and fury of my voice. I gulp and clear my throat, rubbing my neck that I would so like to keep. I raise my hands, "I must then stay here!"
Daemon, face shining with sweat, colored with dirt and blood, beams as he looks up. He chuckles and dismounts his steed. He walks closer to me and begins to remove his armor, "then come down to me, woman!"
The crowd loses it. The women around me scream that I should come down to him.
Maybe if I jump head first, I'll be done with all this bother.
Fuck, but then Libby would be all alone.
I groan under my breath, "fucking Libby. This is all her fucking fault!"
I look back at Daemon, who had two men helping him out of his armor at this point. His eyes are on me; they probably didn't leave. His lips are curved higher, "fear not," he smirks deeper, "did I swear to protect you?"
The crowd is feral. I glance around the place. Isn't the fucking king right there?!
"No!" I look down at him and shake my head, "you swore not to harm us!"
Daemon laughs, "is there a difference?"
"YES!" I blurt, eyes wide.
Daemon stands alone bellow me, free of his upper body armor. He raises his hands up to me, "then believe me when I say you will not be harmed when you jump."
"Oh gods," I grip the railing and screw my eyes shut, "I fucking hate this man."
"Will you make all of King's Landing wait days for you, girl?"
I growl as the people around me continue to pressure me to jump. Had there not been people around, maybe I would have spit at him. And yet - I climb the railing - I am nothing against peer pressure.
Daemon steps forward, arms higher, laugh louder.
The stadium gasps while heart leaps into my mouth when I let go of the railing and drop straight down. The collision is just as messy as I had dreaded it to be and the next thing I know, I've smack dabbed atop the fucking prince of the realm, crushing into the fucking dirt. So much for catching me.
Yet somehow, Daemon manages to let out giggles while the crowd cheers. His arms tighten around me as I push myself up on his chest, "my," he blows silver hair out of his face, "I didn't actually think you'd do it."
"Fuck you," I snap and shove myself off him.
I don't even know where I'm even going, but I storm off anyway, feeling like the biggest idiot in the known galaxy.
But of course, Daemon is quick to get up and grab my arm. He speaks some High Valyrian bullshit, but I care little for it and pry my limb out of his clutch.
It seemed that was the wrong course of action though, cause the next thing I knew, he grabbed me and threw me over his shoulder. The audience flourishes over the way he took me like a piece of meat.
I fucking hate it here.
Make no mistake, I did my due diligence and tried to wrangle out of his grip. But he was pumped with far too much adrenaline, and his inflated ego would not let him let me go.
Eventually, I got tired and just let it happen. The moment he put me down when we arrived at his chambers though, I shoved him off and distanced myself as much as I could, "what the fuck is wrong with you?!"
Daemon responds in High Valyrian, which effectively pisses me off more.
"I don't have TIME to decode your dragon-heir bullshit, so quit it! I am not a toy!"
Daemon chuckles as he takes a towel and wipes his face, "no?"
"Look," I snap, "I know you're, like, touch deprived and emotionally constipated," I stretch my arm out, "I mean, your family-- our family is a fucking wreath, so you're bound to be fucked up in the head, but please," I press my palms together, "PLEASE just be normal until the end of the day, Dae- Prince Daemon."
Daemon laughs as I go off on him. He watches me for a moment, throws the towel to his bed, and tilts his head.
My chest heaves as we stare at each other. Instead of relaxing, I begin to grow more tense with every passing second. I take a deep breath, but it does nothing for my nerves when Daemon walks forward.
"The truth in the matter is," he raises a hand, "you need me."
My stomach drops when he yanks me by the waist. His violet eyes dart down to my heaving chest. He places his one hand on my collarbone, "shhh."
The feel of him pressing onto my flesh does the exact opposite of what he wants. But no-- with how the corner of his mouth curves upward, I think it's actually the exact reaction he wanted.
When I try to push him off, he pulls me tighter into him and repeats, "you need me."
My nostrils flare but I stop repelling him.
"You need me," he lifts his gaze, "but I don't. I want you, but you need me."
I clench my jaw tightly. I am unable to contain my flinch when his hand strokes my side. He continues, "you need me to open the gate for you and your friend come midnight, do you not?"
I turn away from him.
He nudges me and asks louder, "do you not?"
"Yes," I whimper as I shut my eyes.
He hums, "then," he takes my chin in his fingers, "you'll be what I want, riñītsos." Little girl. He raises his brows. "If say you are a toy, then you say, 'yes, my prince'. If I say you are a rug, then I expect you under my heel. If I say you are my dog, then you ought to bark," he releases my chin, "now, bark, my sweet."
I glare at him, "if you want a dog, I suggest you go up North." I push him by his chest.
He laughs. He grabs my arms and pushes me back. I panic when I fumble on my feet and find myself pressed against a wall. "You're right, riñītsos. How wrong of me to liken dragon fire to dog breath."
I gasp when my back hits the wall.
"A shame," he tucks my silver hair behind my ear, "your parents did not give you violet eyes."
I am frozen in my spot when his lips brush against mine. My breath hitches when he simultaneously presses me back with his chest and pulls me forward with his hands.
I don't kiss him back. My brain was in a glitch. He doesn't seem to mind and feasts on my lips. The moment I have the wits to move, he pulls away and whispers, "worry not," he kisses my jaw, "I'll give your babes violet eyes."
Hearing that really snapped me out of my trance.
I finally turn away from him. It does not deter him though, and he makes due with kissing my neck. He moans against me, "you smell divine."
"I-it's called," I push him back, "personal hygiene."
He snakes his arms around me, "you were sent to me by the gods."
"I travelled here by accident!"
"And I plan to make good of this happy accident."
I fight him off when he claws my skirt up. I weigh my chances with screaming and with talking sense into him. I ponder of telling him my vagina is cursed, but then I think he'd be into that.
"Don't fight it," Daemon grabs my wrists, "I will quench the fires of the Targaryen blood in you that calls out to me."
"My blood does not call out to you!" I whimper.
"You may be Gryffindor by name, but you will be a Targaryen once I am done with you."
And then the doors slam open. "Your grace!"
"Harwin," I call out to the man that burst in.
Daemon growls and but does not pull away or turn, "I'm busy."
"It's Lady Hufflepuff," Harwin speaks through strained breath.
"Who?"
My stomach drops, "wait!" I push Daemon harder, "what happened to Libby?"
Daemon finally looks over his shoulder with annoyance, "what happened?"
Harwin takes a moment to respond. The dread that courses through me makes me strong enough to shove Daemon off. He grunts as I do so. I walk over to the dark haired man, "Harwin."
He clenches his jaw and turns to his feet, "I took her to the privy. She said she was having... trouble using it and that I should call a servant to help. So... I fetched a servant, but when I returned," he clears his throat, "she was gone."
I bring my hand to my mouth.
Daemon walks up behind me, "you lost a woman in King's Landing, Strong?"
"I- I did not think much of it at first," Harwin turns to Daemon, "at first I thought she may have just finished and was playing a trick on me," he glances to me but looks away at once, "but then I saw her contraption on the ground-"
I gasp.
"And then I saw a shoe... and then her headscarf-"
"Dear gods, Libby," my voice strains.
"She was taken by a group of three men," Harwin speaks sternly, "I know not for, but they've since regret their decision."
"And Libby!" I jump and grab his arm, "where is she now?!"
Harwin feels guilt eat away at him when he catches my distraught expression. He turns to me, placing a hand on my shoulder, "she's being attended to by the maesters in the ward-"
I dash to the door, intent on reaching her, though I had no idea where I was going.
"It's this way!" Daemon calls.
When I turn to see where he meant, he was already right behind me. He grabs my arm and leads me down the hall.
The moment we get to the ward, I run around and look for Libby. I am shocked solid in my place when I see the cot she is laid upon. My hands slap to my face upon catching her messy hair, dirty skin, and tattered clothes. Her waist was bound in bandages, but that didn't prevent the red to seep through from her side.
I drop to my knees and crawl all the way over to her. I yelp when I feel how cold her hands are. Hot tears burn down my cheek, "Libby, please!"
My breathing becomes more erratic.
"I've spoken to the maesters," Daemon's voice sounds from behind.
"Fucking tetanus, fucking bacterial shock-"
"They said she lost some blood but she will recov-"
"SHUT UP!" I snap and get to my feet, "YOU GET A FUCKING FEVER HERE AND YOU DIE!" I point an accusing finger, "THIS IS ALL YOUR FUCKING FAULT!"
"ME?" Daemon snaps back, "that Strong fool was the one that took his eyes off her!"
"If you had just let us stay in your chambers like I begged you to-- but no! You wanted us to watch your stupid fucking game, you EGOTISTICAL BASTARD!"
He steps forward and barks back, "she still would have needed to go to the privy, you whining nitwit!"
"Why did they even take her?!" I whine.
Daemon does not respond.
"I do not contest that the fault is mine," another voice speaks.
Daemon and I turn to Harwin. His hands are linked in front of him, and only then do I realize they were bloody. More tears gush down my face when the man continues, "it was my duty to keep her-"
"It doesn't matter now, does it!?" I wail, waving my hands around. I fall back on my knees and turn to Libby. Her blue hair was stuck on her sweaty skin. And as I wiped her forehead, it felt like a rehash of last night, except worse. I sob, "nothing's gonna change the fact she got fucking stabbed."
Daemon looks from me to Harwin, "what of the men that took her?"
"I killed them."
My expression drops as I turn to Harwin.
The two stare at each other for a moment.
"Well, we can't question the dead, now can we," Daemon mutters, "feed their corpses to Caraxes."
"W-wait," I feel bile rise up my throat, "did- did you actually kill them?"
Harwin looks at me but doesn't respond. He walks off when Daemon orders him to get a chair. I turn to Daemon and whimper, "he didn't actually kill them... did he actually kill them?"
Daemon nods, "he did," and grabs my arms, "do not insult yourself by sitting on the floor."
For once, I do not fight him back. I let him bring me to my feet. The moment I'm stood before him, he takes my cheeks and wipes my tears.
I shake my head, "I have to take her back."
Daemon raises his brows, "you would dare to move her in such a state?"
"It's the only way she will survive," I mumble through trembling lips.
The prince looks at me for a moment. Harwin finally brings a chair. He places it beside us then stations himself by the door. Neither Daemon nor I make a move for the chair. The former asks, "and you think you can carry her all the way back?"
"Daemon," I grab his arms, "I just have to get her back. Once I'm there, it'll be half the work done."
Daemon releases a breath. He takes my silver locks and fondles with the ends, "and what if I do not want you to leave."
Fuck. "Please," I beg, "please. We both know I don't belong here."
I can see it clearly. It was so clear that those words meant nothing to him. It was talking to a brick wall. I sigh and wipe my face, "I'll do what you want. Whatever it is, I'll do, as long as you let us go by midnight."
Daemon narrows his eyes.
I muster up the most sincere expression I am capable of.
"You will give me whatever I want?"
I close my eyes and shake my head, "yes... my prince."
He does not respond. Daemon turns from me to Libby. He pulls away and calls, "Strong."
"Your grace," Harwin responds.
"She could manage on the back of an ass, could she not?"
Harwin thinks for a moment then nods, "she could."
"Then fetch me an ass," Daemon says. Harwin promptly complies.
Daemon doesn't make me do anything besides sit on his lap while we watched Libby for the rest of the night. I knew in my gut that was not what he wanted out of me, but he didn't say otherwise and I didn't bring it up. Soon enough, it was midnight and there I, Daemon, Harwin, and Libby, sat on a donkey, stood before the open gate of the castle.
Rather than thinking this was stupid and it wasn't going to fucking work, I prayed under my breath to the Seven that we be delivered from this nightmare.
But every time I felt tranquil, the donkey made a sound and I just knew it had to go. What the hell was I going to do with the donkey when I got back to the city anyway?
I clutch the satchel containing our things around my shoulders, "I'll carry her instead."
Daemon and Harwin turn to me and mutter at the same time, "what?"
"I don't want to be responsible for the donk- the animal when I get there."
"Just leave the ass behind," Daemon mutters, rather annoyed.
I grab Libby, who I was already keeping upright, and wrap her arms around my shoulders, "I can carry her."
"No, you can't," Daemon mutters.
Harwin adds, "you are not in the right mind to do this."
"Just," Daemon add, "set the beast free when-"
"I can't just let a donkey loose in King's Landing, Daemon!" I snap, "now please! Help me-"
The bells begin to ring.
I immediately panic.
A surge of adrenaline helps me gather Libby onto my back. "Fucking hell," I grunt and try to fix her on me.
Daemon shakes his hand, "here, let me-"
"I GOT IT!" I scream as the sound of the bell tolling makes my entire body burn with agitation.
I shift Libby on my back one last time and beeline to the gate.
Harwin and Daemon watch. It's impossible to tell which of them is more skeptic in the moment.
I begin to struggle and nearly trip on the annoying skirts hindering my feet. Harwin steps forward, "watch your step."
Daemon eyes him in annoyance, "how helpful."
"Fuck," I panic and begin to walk faster towards the gate, "fucking hell, it's not even that far!"
I reach the large, tunnel-like gate and can't help but close my eyes, afraid that if I could see where I was going, it wouldn't work.
Then SPLAT! I fall face down on the ground.
I scream and immediately roll Libby off me, uncaring that it hurt me, that it hurt her, and quickly get on my feet. I drag her corpse-like body across the expanse and cry as I do so.
I was manic. I was delirious. The sound of the echoing bells did not help the situation at all. I couldn't stop pleading to the gods as I tugged my best friend across the ground. I couldn't even open my eyes because I didn't think my prayers were heard.
"Enough!" a voice calls.
No. NO! That was fucking Daemon. GET THE FUCK AWAY!
I feel someone mess with Libby's body. I screech and refuse to let her go, "LET US GO, DAEMON!"
"THAT'S ENOUGH!"
"NO!" I squeal, finally opening my eyes. I release Libby and lunge at Daemon when I spot him. We crumble to the ground. Once he's on his back, I begin to beat him. It unfortunately doesn't take long for him to overpower me.
"ENOUGH!" he barks, both my hands now trapped in his.
"LET US GO!" I cry.
Daemon shakes his head, "STOP IT!"
"WE'RE GOING BACK!" I try to punch my way out of his grip. It doesn't work.
"Look at me!" Daemon yells, "you dragged her through."
"Get off me!"
"You've done it!!"
I flinch when he shakes me.
"You did it!" Daemon exclaims as he sits up, hands cradling my shoulders, "we're in your time now."
I finally register his words. Daemon looks around, "when you said ruins, I expected an empty castle, not... ruins."
A gasp leaves me when I hear a loud roar from the sky. Daemon looks up when I do, and I calm down when I realize it was only an airplane.
"Was that a dragon?" Daemon asks.
"No," I pull away from him, "that's an-" wait. I stare at him. Daemon fucking Targaryen came back with me?
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jonsnowunemploymentera · 1 month ago
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In the whole “what would the Starks do if Jon’s parentage ever came to light” debate, the most interesting figure to me is Robb Stark. Ned is already caught between a rock and a hard place: duty and love to both his king and his sister’s son, though he already committed treason once to save Lyanna’s boy. Catelyn the embodiment of the Tully words, “family, duty, honor”, is fiercely loyal to her husband and children - but not to Jon. So if she was ever put in a position to choose, it’s obvious what she would do. Then there’s Robb. He’s his father’s heir, his mother’s pride. He’s named after Robert Baratheon, the ruling king of the seven kingdoms, as a testament to his father’s upbringing and love for his friend. But Jon is his brother; his best friend; his greatest companion. Where Ned’s choice would leave him conflicted, Robb doesn’t share the same loyalty to the king. So when forced to fight for the crown or his brother’s life, he’d obviously choose his brother. Which would be an interesting twist of fate. Ned and Robert rebelled for their lives many years prior. How interesting it would be for the boy who bears Robert’s name and the boy who bears Ned’s face to rise in rebellion again.
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