#yall any thoughts or opinions or suggestions??

[yuan4i]

i keep on seeing these sunflower (from spider man) edits of kinich and now i’m tempted to write a smau of him

[gasstationlady]

tom holland’s school of manifestation | a charles leclerc social media au

pairing: charles leclerc x supermodel!reader

charles has a big crush on world renowned supermodel, y/n l/n. who would’ve thought she’d return the feelings.

notes: very much travis kelce x taylor swift inspired. faceclaim is yasmin wijnaldum! btw i try to improve with each post (like how i write/pace the story) so if you have any suggestions, pls (veryvery kindly) tell me!! :))

disclaimer: SORRY FOR TYPOS. GOOGLE TRANSLATE (and from american high school lol) FRENCH. KYM ILLMAN MENTIONED LOL. none of the information in this social media au is factual. i do use old photos of charlotte and charles, and usually i don't like to include pictures of their ex or current gfs in these fics (only bc i want to keep it as imaginative as possible and i feel like adding them kinda gives you a reality check while reading LOL) so lmk your opinions on that!

masterlist

voguemagazine

liked by yourusername, charles_leclerc and 854,487 others

voguemagazine Since beginning modeling at the age of 14, Y/N L/N has cemented herself as the most influential supermodel of all time. As of 2023, she is now the world’s highest paid model surpassing Kendall Jenner who previously led the list. Throughout her career, she has made 39 appearances on international Vogue covers.

Tap the link in our bio to read the full profile. Photographed by @/leannafitz, Written by Phil Stevenson, Styled by @/sheri_simmons, Vogue, February 2023.

View all 942 comments

user MOTHER IS MOTHERING

user omg as someone who has been a fan since she began in 2011, i’m so proud of her 😭

user she's the definition of perfection

user LOL ariana (charles), what are you doing here

↳ user his little crush on her is soo cute 😩

↳ user he’s just like us fr lmaoo

user her walk is legendary like it reminds me so much of naomi

user i was gonna say she’s the model of our generation but that’s wrong. she’s actually the top model of all time 😩😩😩

user i’m glad to see a non-nepo baby be on top of the list

↳ user no literally like no shade to bella, kendall, and them but y/n had to fight tooth and nail to be here

↳ user frrr bc most of the nepo baby models are great, don’t get me wrong. however, they were allowed to make mistakes during their career in order to improve. y/n was not privileged enough to have that. like ppl don’t understand the insane expectations that were placed on her ever since she entered the industry, but she exceeded those expectations every. single. time. and that’s why she deserves this title

user she’s so beautiful

user i would die for y/n

user nothing could describe the amount of affection i have for this woman omfg

charleslc_updates

42,077 likes

charleslc_updates Charles and Arthur talking about Y/N L/N (again lol) in a recent interview 👀

View all 396 comments

user lmaoooooo relatable

user omg i'm new to f1 but i've always been a y/n stan i'm freaakkkinng out but wdym again??

↳ user lmaooo charles is always trying to bring up y/n

user the leclerc brothers 🥰🥰

user it was so cute to see the both of them in one video

user this man fr blushed AHAH cute

user i get it charles i too have the biggest crush on y/n

↳ user lol literally like get in line dude

↳ user back of the line bucko

user i've never seen a man so down bad for someone he's never met

user y/n what are you doing girl if you don't want him ILL DO IT

user @/yourusername

↳ user LMAO YESSS @/yourusername

ynupdates

239,095 likes

ynupdates Y/N opening the 2023 Chanel by Karl Lagerfeld show during Paris Fashion Week.

View all 3,977 comments

user omg she absolutely killed it

user god does she need a dog? i can bark

user i love seeing her thrive

user quick charles this is your chance!!! she’s in paris 😭😭😭 @/charles_leclerc

↳ user lmaooooo not you tagging him but literally though

↳ user no srsly please mr. "i hope our paths cross soon" you don't understand i need this to happen

user yall saw that walk??? ugh y/n the woman that you are

user i don’t get the hype. all she does is walk.

user NAHHHH SHE ATEEE THAT

user i’m so happyyyy 🥺 y/n is so booked and busy she’s really out here doing multiple back to back shows for paris fashion week

↳ user same! it’s crazy that she gets to open and close multiple shows, especially ones like chanel!

user i love that so many people are going to these shows just to see y/n

user i could make this exact dress with my curtains

user if i ever meet her in real life i would die happily

yourusername

liked by charles_leclerc, bellahadid and 5,490,124 others

yourusername rien de mieux que d'etre a la maison [no place like home]

View all 12,658 comments

gigihadid sexy lady

↳ yourusername already missing you

user i keep forgetting she's part french

user you absolutely KILLED those shows

voguemagazine iconic ⭐️

alexademie 🔥🔥

user beautiful girl!!

user omggg charles liking this LOL

↳ user it's actually frustrating me that this man has no game like i'm rooting for you cmon

↳ user lmaooo literally though i'm just hoping he's pulling some strings behind the scenes

anokyai 😍😍😍

user la plus belle fille [the most beautiful girl] *liked by charles_leclerc

↳ user if this is him shooting his shot 😭😭

↳ user lol charles is down so bad he's even going through the comments

user am i just crazy but why are there two drinks in the second post? like is this supposed to be a very soft launch

↳ user it's probably gigi 😭😭 she did comment saying that they were hanging out with each other

↳ user but why not just take a pic of her tho

deuxmoi

31,844 likes

deuxmoi Y/N L/N & Charles Leclerc spotted hanging out with each other in Paris

View all 992 comments

user NO WAY OMG

user i'm actually in disbelief how tf did charles get here

user i knew you could do it charles!!

user TURN IT UP IVE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS ONE

user so are they dating???

user CHARLES FR WINNING RN AHAH

↳ user NO LITERALLYYY HES BEEN DREAMING ABOUT THIS FOR AGES

↳ user he manifested this 😭

user they look sooo good together

user why does he look so srs

↳ user give my man a break 😩

↳ user well it looks like he’s not your man anymore 😭😭

user omgg this is like a fairytale

user wait i'm kinda obsessed with this

user i’m so invested

kymillman

201,885 likes

kymillman Y/N AND CHARLES

Ferrari driver Charles Leclerc is joined at the track today by top supermodel, Y/N L/N. This is the first time Y/N is with him and she clearly shines in front of the camera.

Her debut at the grid has quickly become a popular topic as fans and drivers alike are intrigued by the presence of one of the most famous women in the world.

For A3 prints, hand-signed & numbered by a range of drivers/team principals head to kymillman.com #f1 #formula1 #signedprints #japanesegp #CharlesLeclerc #Y/NL/N

View all 971 comments

user SHDJEJ IM ACTUALLY GOING FERAL

user mom and dad 😩

user so it’s official???

↳ user i mean this is the hardest launch they could have done other than posting 😭

user i’m a charles fan and even i’m surprised he got her to date him

user i’m rooting for them so much 🥺🥺

user she’s serving though

user i’m watching the race rn and they literally keep talking about y/n being there AHH

↳ user i always forget she’s kind of a big deal

user kym gets on my nerves but this picture is actual gold

user it's so obvious that this is a publicity stunt

↳ user nah but for who? bc i know damn well that neither charles nor y/n need it

↳ user obviously not for them but maybe it's to gather more attention for f1

↳ user girl i need u to listen to urself rn 😭 bc that makes no sense

user idk who charles is and idk what the hell f1 is but best believe i’m tuning in next race just to see y/n

↳ user literally me girl i can’t believe i’m watching cars drive in a circle rn

yn_updates

91,922 likes

yn_updates Some moments of Y/N being mentioned by drivers during the Formula 1 race

View all 1,061 comments

user i swear it was like every minute i'd hear y/n's name

user the way that all the drivers are aware of charles's long time obsession with y/n LOL

↳ user i just know charles is the type to never shut up about her ahaha

user she's literally THE y/n l/n. i mean if viewers are sky rocketing just by her being there, imagine her impact if she had actively promoted it

↳ user she's so iconic

↳ user no bc i love y/n so much that i just forced myself to watch rich grown men vroom vroom in circles for almost 2 hrs just to catch a glimpse of her

user i'm in love with her life

user LMAOOO THE DRIVERS TEASING CHARLES

user lando's so funny 😭😭

user y/n and f1 stans are being FED today wow

user is it just me or am i kinda annoyed about how often they're bringing her up like my girl can't even support her bf in peace

↳ user yea i'm eating it up but also feeling bad for y/n at the same time. the attention is definitely a double edge sword.

user apparently she was with joris most of the time 🥺

user this is literally straight from a fairy tale i can't

user didn't they just meet like a week ago

↳ user as far as we know they were first spotted together about a month ago by that deuxmoi post. but assuming from y/n and charles's past relationships, i don't think they'd be this comfortable going public without being together for a while

↳ user yea this has definitely been going on longer than we think/have been seeing

charles_leclerc

liked by yourusername, gigihadid, landonorris and 7,712,083 others

charles_leclerc J'ai toujours su que c'était toi. Joyeux anniversaire, mon amour ❤️ [I've always known it was you. Happy birthday, my love]

View all 34,511 comments

yourusername merci, mon cœur ❤️ [thank you, my heart]

yourusername je suis raide dingue de toi [i'm madly in love with you]

↳ charles_leclerc l'amour de ma vie [the love of my life]

user are we interrupting something...

user i can’t believe it’s already been 6 months since they first went public

user throwing myself down the stairs as we speak

user they don't know it yet but we're actually a throuple

user happy birthday y/n!!!

user in love with their love 🥺

user lmfaoooo i just know charles is on cloud 9 this man literally sees y/n and is blind to everything else

↳ user he's sooo cute, he's like a love sick puppy

user i still think this is a pr relationship

user god i'd die for someone to look at me the way charles looks at y/n in that second pic

user this is my roman empire

user i'm so obsessed with them it's insane

user our generation's brad and angelina

↳ user don't say that wtf my parents are never separating

user pls don't ever breakup 😭😭

[zerobaselove]

like a phantom | shen ricky

pairing: ricky x reader

genre: suggestive MINORS DNI

word count: 1111

warnings: no actual smut it just gets suggestive ! lowercase intended, not proofread.

notes: for my fave ricky stan ! also can yall tell i am also a wayv ult LMAO anyways this was a huge war in my mind between ricky and hao but here we are,,, maybe i will write smth similar for hao too idk

being the partner of a world famous idol definitely had it's struggles, but that's not to say it didn't have it's perks too. like how you found yourself sitting backstage to one of the most anticipated concerts of the year, the first stop of the zerobaseone tour.

though the behind the scenes of a big event like this was hectic, you and ricky still managed to find a few moments to spend in each others presence, even if it was just helping him with the finishing details of his outfit. with nine members, the few stylists on hand were thankful for your helping hand, it was one less person they had to worry too much about. not to mention, you enjoyed the few minutes together before he had to go on stage, and ricky swore it made him perform better. did he ever perform badly though? you smiled to yourself, thinking of how proud you were to call him yours.

"y/n" his voice was barely audible over the shuffling clothes around you, "can you tighten this up for me?" he pointed to the garment around his waist, and your eyes nearly popped out of your head. a black satin corset hung loosely on his waist, the strings hanging off the back, waiting for you to tug them tight.

curse your mind and the places it could go, you thought to yourself as your jaw hung slack in front of your boyfriend. you couldn't even begin to process the rest of his outfit or the makeup that complimented his features so perfectly before he was turned around in front of you, awaiting your helping hands.

"you okay?" ricky's voice pulled you from your thoughts, shaking your head slightly before giving a curt reply, bringing your hands to tightly grip the ribbons attached to the corset.

you twisted the ribbon around each of your hands, tugging them in opposite directions. which, to your dismay, pushed a whiny gasp out of the boy's mouth from the sudden movement. you were going to pass out.

"sorry rik," you hummed, gently tightening the strings until the boning perfectly contoured to his waist before tying it all into a pretty bow at the small of his back.

you didn't realize the way you had been staring until ricky cleared his throat, looking up to find him now turned to face you with a smirk on his face. "i would say wish me luck, but it looks like you might need it more than me right now." he chuckled lowly, causing you to swallow the breathe you had been holding, hoping to push down the wandering thoughts with it.

your conversation was cut short by the call to get to the stage, so with a small kiss on your temple, ricky was off to the stage.

as you watched from the sidelines, you realized you didn't actually know what they were about to perform. you racked your brain to think of any zb1 songs that would require an outfit like that, but before you could settle on a song, a familiar tune started playing. phantom by wayv.

suddenly the outfits made sense as you thought back to what you could remember from the music video that you had seen once or twice.

to say the song choice was perfect for ricky would be a severe understatement in your humble opinion. the concept felt right up his alley, and was one you had rarely gotten to see on him. the closest had been over me, and even that seemed to pale in comparison to the performance before your eyes.

the rest of the concert continued on, stealing a few minutes for yourselves between outfit changes and vcr clips. but your mind kept coming back to your boyfriend in that black corset, like a moth drawn to a flame.

you found yourself counting down the minutes until you would have the boy to yourself for more than a few moments, and it was driving you crazy. but soon enough the boys were home at their dorm, and you had joined them for the night to celebrate.

you spent an hour or so with everyone, laughing and joking with all of them together before ricky leaned down until his lips nearly grazed your ear, "come back to bed with me?" he whispered, his hot breath on your skin causing a shiver to run down your spine before quickly nodding.

"i think we are gonna head to bed," ricky smiled innocently, grabbing your hand, "it's getting late." you let out a yawn to only further convince them of his excuse, saying your goodnight's and heading back to ricky's room.

alone at last.

you plopped your body onto your boyfriend's bed, not realizing how much you missed it. despite only being gone for the day. you closed your eyes for a moment, taking in the scent of his cologne that encapsulated the room until you felt the mattress dip beside you.

"so you're just gonna pretend that we both don't know you've been waiting to get your hands on me since phantom?" he chuckled, his hand resting on your thigh as he looked at you expectantly.

"listen," you mumbled, sitting up to look at the boy, taking a moment to notice the slightly faded lipstick adorning his lips and the way the small lamp on his desk perfectly illuminated his skin with a certain warmth that the stage lights could never replicate. "how am i supposed to stay sane when you looked like that," your voice trailed off, a mere whisper now, "or like this." your eyes flickered between his lips and his eyes, trying to commit every detail to memory.

he only smiled as he inched closed to you, leaning back in towards your ear just as he had done a few minutes ago, "well you have me now, what's stopping you?"

any words you had thought of speaking aloud had gotten trapped in your throat, being quickly replaced by your rather obnoxiously loud heartbeat.

"or do you need me to help you now?" he smirked, letting his lips graze your ear, finding the sweet spot on your neck and placing delicate kisses on the sensitive skin as he awaited your response. you could only manage an eager hum, not quite trusting your voice in this position.

his lips ventured from your neck to your collarbone, eventually finding their way back to your own lips before pulling away slightly, his hand lightly pushing on your shoulder until you hit the pillows behind you.

"don't worry baby," he positioned himself above you, caging you between his arms, "i'd be happy to help."

[multi-fxndom446]

6 Months

John ‘Soap’ Mactavish X Reader

Summary: Johnny would come to your rescue any time you needed. He is thoroughly protective of you.

Warning: light angst, fluffy. Not much tbh. It may be a little rushed?? Idk anymore😭

Word count: 2.6k

•

This is Johnnys part two to his ‘You came? You called.’ Series.

His part one is here

Can’t tell if I hate this or not so hopefully yall like it🫶🏻

6 months.

6 months was how long it took before you introduced Johnny to your boyfriend. He wasn't sure if it was because he was deployed or because you were nervous about how he’d react to him

Because it was safe to say Johnny hated your boyfriend. It took him 6 months to meet him and less than 6 seconds to decide he hated him.

He didn’t like the way your boyfriend looked at you, or talked to and about you. He didn’t like the way your boyfriend's eyes would roam to other women when you weren’t looking. But he especially hated the way you smiled when you talked about him.

He hated the way your eyes would light up whenever his name left your lips. He hated the way you would blush when he would give you any sort of attention after ignoring you the whole night.

God if only you knew, Johnny would spend his days making you blush any chance he got. He’d give you so much attention you’d never have to beg him for a simple kiss on the cheek.

You’d never even worry about his attention being anywhere else but you because where else would they be if not you? His attention was already always on you, it had been since you two became best friends.

He tried to like your boyfriend he really did, or at least he wanted to be okay with him. Because your happiness topped anything he was feeling in the moment. He tried his hardest, he put on his best smile and was ready to lose you until he saw the cocky smirk your boyfriend had on his face when they made eye contact for the first time.

Johnny shook his hand stiffly as the other man sized him up. It was like he knew he had something that Johnny could only ever dream of having, your love. And what’s worse was the asshole never deserved it.

But he bit his tongue. Kept his opinions to himself, kept the harsh comments he had ready at bay.

Oh but how he wished he could hit your boyfriend, just once. One time would suffice. One time and he’d have it out of his system, one time to let him wipe the smug smile off his face.

That was all before your phone call though.

Now he was sat on his couch, knee bouncing anxiously as he tried to calm himself down. It was nearing the end of the second week of you staying with him and currently you were fast asleep in his bed, tears still staining your cheeks.

You were glad you left and he knew that but he also knew it was one of your longest relationships and when you loved someone you loved them with your whole heart.

Not only had he abused that but he tore it to shreds when he even suggested the idea of you cheating.

It made Johnny clench his jaw even tighter when he recalled the words. How would he think you were even capable of cheating when your whole world was him?

He couldn’t even fathom the possibility of ever laying a hand on you and it just made his body shake in anger the more he thought about it.

Although he didn’t really understand where this wave of anger came from, the moment his eyes landed on his phone he knew.

His phone was open on the coffee table in front of him, showing the text conversation between him and Price. His captain had just made him aware he was needed back at base in the next few days.

He never replied to it because instantly his mind was taken over with what he was going to do for you. The stress of trying to find a solution that would make you happy and keep you safe gave way to the thoughts of why you were hurting in the first place.

Then down the rabbit hole he went.

He stared long and hard at the message before he ultimately reached over and turned off his phone, leaving it there when he got up to go check on you.

You were still fast asleep when he reached his room and he took a moment to admire the scene in front of him. A scene he was sure he’d never have the pleasure of seeing everyday.

A scene of you wrapped up in his blankets, head resting on his pillows, on his bed. He couldn’t help the flutter he felt in his chest when he noticed you were also in one of his shirts.

His arms were crossed as he leaned against his door frame just taking you in when he noticed your phone buzzing and you rolled over to ignore it. He wasn’t trying to be nosy but he couldn’t help it when he caught a glimpse of your exes name from where he was.

Instantly he pushed himself off the doorframe and came closer. He stared down at your phone for a few seconds before declining the call and it was then he noticed the multiple missed calls and texts he had left you.

“Bloody Christ.” Johnny muttered to himself in distaste. How could the man not grab a hint?

“Johnny?” Immediately his attention was back on you. You, who turned to see who was bothering you while rubbing the sleep from your eyes. “Is everything okay?”

“Course Bonnie.” He soothed as he sat down on the edge of the bed next to you while his hand came up to run through your hair as you laid your head back down completely content. “Didn’t mean to wake you.”

“‘S fine.” You watched him, noticing the way he wouldn’t meet your gaze.

“I need to talk to you bout something.” He said softly while he moved his hand to hold one of yours. “Price called me in early, I have to go back to base.”

You shifted so you could see him better and he could see the worry starting to creep inside you. “You need me to leave?”

“What? No. No Bonnie, that's not what I’m gettin at.” He shook his head and held your hand tighter. “I want you..I want you to come with me.”

“Johnny-“

“There’s some apartments near the base that we can rent. You’ll have the space all to yourself for the most part when I’m away on missions, but this way I’ll be closer to you and I’ll come home to you every chance I get.” He could see the way your eyes widened at his words before his words even registered to him.

‘I’ll come home to you.’

Suddenly he was pulling himself away from you, “or if you want to stay here, you’re more than welcome to stay in my apartment but-“ you cut him off as you sat up quickly to grab his hand in yours again and it made him pause to take a breathe. “But if you stay here I can’t protect you like I want to. If you come with me, you’ll be far from him.”

He studied you, waiting for your reaction but all you did was play with his fingers. He felt like the silence was going to consume him until finally you met his gaze again.

“Okay.” You nodded, “when do we leave?”

The amount of relief that flooded his veins was unparalleled. He squeezed your hand again, “Few days.” And just like that you were getting up from the bed to go pack the little things you had taken with you.

~~

6 months.

6 months was all it took for you to uproot your life and move with Johnny closer to base.

6 months was all it took for you and him to settle into this new normal. You both agreed on just renting a one bedroom apartment considering he would be gone most of the time.

You had even Invested in one of those pull out couches so he could sleep on that whenever he would come home.

But you never put up a fight when he one day he would start coming home to you and crash into the same bed as you.

You never put up a fight when he’d unconsciously, (or consciously. You weren’t sure anymore) wrap an arm around you and pull you as close to him as he could before falling asleep.

6 months was all it took for you and Johnny to fall into a normal schedule. Even when he was gone for days or weeks at a time whenever he came home it was like nothing changed.

You’d have the apartment cleaned and have dinner ready for him. It all felt so normal for the both of you.

He’d always greet you with a smile and a kiss on the head or if he had an extra strenuous mission he’d hug you and hold you for what would feel like hours.

The first few times he’d come home after a long time away you were always worried there would be some awkward tension there, especially when you started putting more and more of your things out.

He never complained. He loved that you made the small space feel like home and he wouldn’t admit that he loved coming home to a place that made him feel like he was surrounded by you.

6 months was all it took for you to forget about your ex boyfriend.

It was such an easy thing to do when Johnny had now surrounded your every thought. Any which way you turned you were reminded of the fact that your best friend cared for you.

Any time he could sense you were starting to fall back into bad memories he’d be right next to you giving you a new happy memory to cloud the old one.

Anytime he knew he’d be away for longer than a few days he would use every chance he got to call you or text you, anything just to check on you and make sure you were okay.

You were sure you hadn’t thought of your ex way before 6 months because how could you? It was so easy to forget him when you had Johnny. Between the late night cuddles, the forehead kisses he had gotten so used to giving you and the more soft intimate moments of just being in his presence.

Moments like this, with his hand around your waist and the other grasping your hand softly while he swayed to some song he put on in the background.

All this happening because of a comment you made, during dinner, about never having danced with someone before. Something Johnny couldn’t let just go unnoticed.

Next thing you knew he was on his feet, hand extended to you. You laughed him off at first but he made a grab motion before he just ultimately grabbed your hand and yanked you up.

The both of you already danced through a few songs while you talked about things you would normally talk about during dinner but dinner was on the table long forgotten for this moment.

He told you all about his task force and about Ghost who he said he hoped you could meet one day along with Gaz and price.

“They already know all about ya.” He had said it so cheekily with a smug grin on his face that you couldn’t help but laugh.

“Talk about me a lot do you Johnny?”

He nodded immediately and tightened his hold, “everyday.” Your eyes widened at his response and you decided to leave it there while he swayed you through the next few songs.

He spun you around once before pulling you back into him and you smiled brightly at him before realizing how long you had been doing this.

“Johnny you don’t have to do this anymore, I think I got the hang of it after the first few songs.” You laughed at him softly, your cheeks turning a soft shade of pink when he looked down at you with a fond smile on his face.

“Course I do.” He grinned. “You been through enough recently, least I can do ‘s give you a night to remember.”

You shook your head in disbelief, your hand holding onto his tighter. “You’ve already been doing that since that night.” Your voice trailed off as you recalled when he had come to your rescue.

Johnny frowned when you wouldn’t meet his gaze and he moved the hand from your waist to grip your chin softly and have you look at him again. “And I’ll do it as long as I’m breathing.”

Your breathe caught in your throat when you saw the intense sincerity. “Johnny..”

“You know that don’t you?” His eyes searched yours, looking for something you weren’t sure what. “You know I’d do anythin for you?”

You nodded softly as you whispered a quiet, ‘I know.’ You moved the hand you had wrapped around his neck to cup his cheek, your thumb smoothing over his cheekbone.

He closed his eyes and took a deep breathe in. “What’re you thinking about?” You practically whispered and he opened his eyes again to look at you.

By now there was hardly any space left between the both of you and the hand he had holding your chin moved so he was also cupping your cheek. “Doesn't matter.”

“Matters to me. Please Johnny, what are you thinking about?” His eyes searched yours again before he seemed to find exactly what he was looking for and he moved forward slowly until his lips just barely brushed yours.

“How I don’t wan’ any o’ this to change.” He muttered against your lips. He loved the way he could see your gaze drop to his lips the second he did. “How I wan’ to have a life with you Bonnie.”

Your eyes met his again. “And how I really want ta kiss you.” You watched him swallow hard while he waited for your move.

“Then do it.” You whispered and it was all he needed to hear before he pulled you even closer and closed the gap.

His hand on your cheek moved up to tangle itself into your hair while the other moved down to your waist to pull you closer against him.

You couldn’t help the gasp of surprise by the intensity of his kiss, like he had been waiting to kiss you for as long as he could remember. Which he had.

When he kissed you it felt like everything was right with the world, like everything was as it should be now and you couldn’t help the way your hand moved to clutch onto his shirt for support.

He only pulled away when he felt your tremble against his hold and he was quickly scanning your face to make sure you were okay but you were already pulling him back down to you.

“I love you Johnny.” You muttered when you pulled away to breathe. The smile that broke out onto his face was a site you could get used to.

“Been waitin to hear those words for ages, lass.” Then he pulled you into a hug like he couldn’t believe this was actually happening. “I’ve loved you for as long as I can remember.”

You were smiling too as you ran your fingers through his hair while he hugged you.

6 months could feel like a lifetime when spent with the right person.

Because 6 months is all it took for you to come to terms with the fact that you were irrevocably in love with John Mactavish.

And you had been all along.

~~

The end

Also should I add more Ghosts characters to my scenarios? Like Logan and Hesh?

Also sorry if I disappear for a lil while again, gonna try and get more then one thing written before I start posting so then I can give u guys more content❤️

[raainberry]

Healing

« silly series - 8 »

Sana x gn!reader

Fluff

synopsis - sana has been helping you recover from a bad cold

wordcount - 1.1K

T/W - Food, Suggestive at one point

A/N - happy belated new year yall, it was a fun one for me i hope it was for you too!

“Sana.” You mumbled, walking into the kitchen of your shared apartment.

The cooking pot on the grill lost her attention as soon as she heard your voice, and she turned to bless you with that beautiful smile of hers.

If you weren’t feeling so weak, you’d have tried to match it. After coming down with a bad cold, it seemed you could only pout at her, prompting her to take care of your every need in seconds.

You weren’t exactly enjoying the free and excellent services, you didn’t want to be a bother, but it was nice having her around. Her love was a better medicine than the awful tasting one she was giving you. If it weren’t for her threats to take them away if you didn’t eat it, you’d have relied solely on her cuddles and kisses.

“Look at you, you made it out of bed!” She cheered, teasing your justified laziness the past few days.

She was glad to see you felt better, but the fact that you didn’t respond told her you weren’t really recovered yet either. Instead of the usual eye-roll or clap back, she was met with your arms around her, pulling her close and into their familiar warmth.

You hummed at the comfort she brought you, the one you’d finally found enough strength to pull yourself out of bed for. As much as you loved and appreciated all the cuddles she’d given you, you were starting to miss her hugs. The proper kind.

“Are you feeling better?” She asked, wanting to confirm her thoughts and you nodded as if she could see it.

One of her hands rested around your waist while the other checked for any signs of abnormal temperature on the side of your neck. Her touch was cold, but soothing. As great as it felt, it wasn’t exactly good news.

“You still have a bit of a fever. If it’s not gone before bed you’ll have to take the medicine, Y/n.” She said, making you pull away just enough for her to see you shaking your head.

“No please, I don’t need it anymore.” You groaned, but she only laughed at your childish tantrum.

“That’s what you said this morning and I believed you, now look at you.” She argued, cupping your face and squishing your warm, pink cheeks together.

It took everything in her not to kiss your lips, you looked adorable, but she couldn’t afford getting sick herself at the moment. She was risking enough by spending so much time by your side already.

“Well, believe me again, please. I really don’t want to swallow any more of that, it’s too awful.” You whined.

“That’s usually how you know it’s good for you.” She pointed out, an opinion you happened to not believe at all.

“I don’t remember you tasting bad.” You smiled, making her jaw drop slightly. The sight made you laugh out loud for the first time in a while, something Sana was thankful for despite the horrible joke.

“You’re lucky you’re sick, I would have hit you so hard.” She said, pulling away from you to give her attention back to the chicken soup she was making.

“I know, I kind of took advantage of that.” You said, resting your chin on her shoulder as your arms found her waist again.

You were particularly clingy in that state, and she wasn’t complaining one bit. She loved to feel you close, to feel you needing her, and your sick self served it all in an amazing way.

Sana smiled to herself when she felt your body lean into her back as you tried to get a good look inside the pot. It pushed her to place a quick kiss on your cheek before turning off the heat.

“I bet that’ll taste way better anyway.” You mumbled, already salivating despite having eaten the same meal five times since getting sick.

It was all you wanted and asked for, which kind of relieved Sana as it was one of the few things she could do well in the kitchen.

You watched as she poured some in a bowl she had prepared, still clinging onto her. She whined about wanting some space to not spill anything, but you wouldn’t hear it.

“Are you gonna eat while holding on to me?” She asked while pouring a second bowl for herself.

“If you feed me, I’m pretty sure I can.” You joked, but a spoon suddenly approached your lips soon after.

“Blow on it, it’s hot.” She smiled when you met her eyes.

You did as you were told, soon tasting her love in the food. Its warmth spread in your chest, slowly relieving some of the pain you’ve been feeling.

“So good.” You hummed, causing her to grin. “Thank you so much, I love you.”

The three little words caused another type of warmth to spread in Sana’s chest, all the way down to her stomach. The sensation pushed her to lay another kiss on your cheek, followed by a few more. It was the only way to stop her love for you from overflowing.

“I love you too, baby.” She giggled. “Do you think you can survive on the couch for a couple hours?”

“Probably. Why?” You wondered.

“I wanted to watch a movie with you. It’s been a while since we last spent a lazy night together.” She mindlessly played with the fabric of your hoodie as she spoke, and you wondered if the pouty eyes she was giving you were on purpose.

Either way, you couldn’t and wouldn’t say no to her. It had indeed been a while, you missed bonding over your favorite genres.

“Okay, but no horror movie.” You pleaded, and she laughed. “I’m serious, I don’t feel like jumping all over the place it’s too draining.”

“Fine, we’ll choose something chill.” She gave in, taking pity in your state despite finding it amusing.

“And if I fall asleep we’re staying there all night.” You added.

“I’m all good with that. Is that all?”

“I think it is.”

“Then come on!” She cheered, handing you your bowl of soup before running over to the couch in your living room.

When you joined her, she was already looking through the TV’s vod catalogue, her steaming soup waiting on the coffee table.

You put yours down as well, grabbing the plaid from the couch and wrapping it around yourself before pulling her in as well after sitting down next to her.

She snuggled into you, and you both forgot about the warm comfort food for a long while after that, getting lost in the movie you’d picked out.

You groaned when she suddenly remembered about it after feeling your warm skin underneath your hoodie. This kind of comfort wasn’t worth leaving for anything, especially not for the medicine she forced you to take along with the reheated soup.

“If I’m not better tomorrow I’m suing you.” You glared at her, shuddering at the aftertaste.

“Not if I keep you close like this, you won’t.” She grinned, wrapping her arms back around you to lay you down with her.

She was right. That’s why you didn’t argue further, deciding to melt into her embrace instead.

Good thing she didn’t mind falling asleep on that couch, because that was definitely where you were heading.

[virescent-v]

School Yard Bully

hi hello! a cheeky bingo req incoming!

could i request Emily x Reader with the prompt „I want to hear you beg”? Maybe a bit of enemies to lovers? <3

Filling the prompt for the lovely @prentiss-theorem bingo :)

Summary: Emily's had it out for you since you joined the BAU. What is her deal?!

Word count: 2k+

Warnings: Some light cursing. Surprisingly, no smut yall, sorry to disappoint ;)

You’ve busted your ass every single day since joining the BAU. You got the job on a whim, a chance connection between your previous boss and someone within the office. You didn’t ask too many questions; you were just excited for a once in a lifetime opportunity to show off your knowledge and skills. 

Of course, that doesn’t mean that everyone found your presence…helpful. Most of the team had no issues with you, accepting you with open arms, showing you the ropes and learning as much as they could about you. 

Actually, there was only one person who seemed to have an issue with your arrival. 

Emily. 

You weren’t really sure what the problem was. From the get go, she’s seemed to have it out for you in some way or another. At first, you thought it was just normal newbie hazing. But, it’s been months and she’s never warmed up to you. 

She constantly berates you in front of others, never taking your suggestions seriously, always doubting the information you shared, finding second opinions from other team members when she could. She always found excuses to never be alone in the same room with you, always got out of doing interrogations, stakeouts, or assignments with you. She didn’t ask you any personal questions; hell, she barely tried to talk to you. If she did, it was usually snarky, sassy, and to be honest, a little rude. 

At this point, you’d learned to try your best to stay away from her. 

Hotch had noticed almost immediately that something was off. He tried talking to the two of you together about it, but both of you said nothing. He kept Emily in his office after you left, their voices raised from inside the office. She left not five minutes after you, slamming his door shut on her way out before leaving the office for the day. 

No one else on the team seemed to know what was up with Emily either. 

Penelope, JJ, Derek, and Spencer had all had separate conversations with you regarding her behavior, trying to get to the bottom of it. None of them had a clue. 

Regardless of her behavior, you knew that she wouldn’t let anything happen to you in the field. She was no nonsense, and somehow that made you feel a little bit better. 

Still, it pissed you off that you knew you hadn’t done anything to her, and yet, she was still a bitch to you. 

At the six month mark, you could tell the team was getting frustrated by the lack of connection between the two of you. You oftentimes didn’t do after-work social gatherings because you didn’t want to make Emily hate you even more. She was here first after all. 

“Oh, come on! You never hang out with us!” Penelope exclaimed, tugging on the sleeve of your blazer. “Just this once, please!” 

You could feel yourself giving in to the temptation of a night with the group. After a hellish week at work, you could use the drink and some unwinding at David’s. 

But, you knew that Emily was going, as her and JJ had been talking about what food from Rossi they were most looking forward to at lunch. 

You pulled your bottom lip between your teeth. “I don’t know, Pen. I’m not really feeling up to…all that,” you sighed, taking a sidelong glance at where Emily was in conversation with Reid. 

Penelope sighed right back at you. “I know, sugarplum. But you two need to work out your issues. For the betterment of the team. And both of your sanities.” 

You rolled your eyes, Penelope’s truthful words putting you on edge. You knew that you couldn’t let Emily bully you forever, but you really just didn’t have it in you to deal with her sarcastic comments tonight. 

You crossed your arms before looking Penelope in the eyes. “Fine, I will go,” you said, Penelope whooping in excitement. “On one condition.” 

Penelope’s face went straight, one of the most serious looks on her face you’ve ever seen. “Name it.” 

You smirked. “You run interference and don’t leave me alone in a room with her.” 

Penelope’s smile grew. “You got it, sweet cheeks.” 

*

You and Penelope arrived at David's at the same time, heading immediately inside to his stocked bar, quickly making yourself a drink. 

You had barely taken a sip before Emily was in your face, making some snarky comment about how you handled yourself during the case this past week. You could feel your irritation growing, even though Penelope was trying her hardest to distract and move the conversation along. JJ shuffled her feet, trying to pull Emily away towards the dart board Rossi had for a game. 

For whatever reason, Emily wasn’t taking the hint or bait. She stayed focused on you, her dark eyes burning holes into you. You could feel the heat flushing up your chest, finding a home on your round cheeks. 

You felt like the odd kid out, just like you did in elementary school. You didn’t deserve her hatred, her comments growing more and more fierce. You hated how well Emily could read you, even for someone who didn’t know you that well. She was finding every insecurity you had and digging her claws into them, overwhelming you. 

Instead of embarrassment or shame heating up your insides, all you felt was fury. It had been months of rude ass comments and you were getting absolutely sick of it. 

“Fuck off, Emily,” you all but growled. You watched as she paused for a second, almost as if she was in shock of you finally sticking up for yourself. 

She quickly refocused, a slight smirk on her lips. “And if I don’t?” Her eyebrow lifted. 

You scanned your eyes up and down her body, noticing how Emily’s body was almost leaning closer to yours, ready for a fight. Your expression mirrored her own. “You don’t know me, Prentiss, of your own doing,” you paused, watching as Emily seemed to be hanging on to your every word. “I’ll kick your ass if I need to. Now, leave me alone and let me enjoy my drink in peace,” you turned back to the bar, trying to find the rum to make yourself another drink. 

Before you could, you felt two warm hands on your hips, forcibly turning you around. 

You came face to face with Emily, her body so close with every breath you could feel her breasts graze yours, her arms on either side of you on the counter, closing you in. “I’d like to see you try, princess,” she whispered, her breath ghosting over yours, the smell of liquor present, but not overly strong. 

At this point, you were absolutely fed up with Emily. You shoved her off of you, causing her to stumble a little over her own feet. Before you could rush forward, Derek was pulling you in the opposite direction, Hotch pulling Emily in the other. 

“Enough!” Hotch yelled, causing the irritated banter between the two of you to stop completely. “I have had enough of this, whatever this is, between the two of you. It ends tonight.” He motioned to Derek, both of them dragging you off further into the house, shoving both of you into one of Rossi’s guest bedrooms. 

Before either of you could make towards the door, you heard a lock click into place. “No fucking way,” Emily hissed. She tried the handle, finding it impossible to move. “Let us out! Come on guys, this isn’t funny!” 

“No, what isn’t funny is your behavior towards each other for the past six months. It ends tonight. I’m serious,” Hotch spoke. “You two will stay in that room until you work whatever this is out.” 

“You’re treating us like teenagers, Hotch! Now let me out!” Emily said, banging her fist on the door. 

“I wouldn’t have to treat you like teenagers if you acted like grown adults. Have a good night, guys!” 

You and Emily could hear multiple sets of footsteps leading down the long, secluded hallway away from the room. 

“Those sons of bitches,” Emily muttered. “I will make them pay when I get out of here.” 

You scoffed, drawing Emily’s attention once more. “Oh, come off it, Em. This is one-hundred percent your fault.” 

Now it was Emily’s turn to scoff. “My fault? Mine?! How the hell is this my fault!?” 

You rolled your eyes, the anger simmering just under the surface. “You’ve been a raging cunt since I got here, Prentiss. I tried for months to befriend you. To get on your good side. But no matter what I did, I couldn’t. So, I gave up. I stayed away from you.” You could feel the fight slowly leaving you, entirely spent on this ongoing argument. 

You stared down at your hands, fiddling with the wristband of your watch, a nervous habit you’ve never been able to break. “I begged Hotch for a transfer, but he denied it. You’ve made my life hell since joining the BAU, Emily, so much so that I wanted to leave.” You sighed. “I don’t know what I did that pissed you off so much, but I’m done fighting with you. You win.” 

You weren’t sure how you were going to face the team whenever they decided to let you out, but you could feel the blush staining your cheeks already from embarrassment. You wondered if this was going to be the straw that broke the camel’s back and force you to quit, a thought that’s been rattling around for a few weeks. 

“The first day you walked into the BAU, you took my breath away,” Emily whispered. 

Your head snapped up, trying to catch her eyes, but finding her facing away from you, her arms curled around herself protectively. 

Emily chuckled humorlessly. “God, you were so gorgeous and bright eyed and excited and I couldn’t stop thinking about how much I wanted to kiss you.” She paused, looking up, finding a dumbstruck expression on your face, your mouth hanging open in shock. 

“Probably wasn’t the best way to go about things, ya know, but I settled into the middle school-bully your crush-ideal and it just stuck,” she sighed. “I think it was a way to protect myself.” Her eyes caught yours. “Because I knew that you were capable of tearing my heart to pieces.” 

You felt about ten different emotions run through you at once. “Are you fucking kidding me, Emily?” 

You watched as Emily instinctively took a step back, wincing at the tone of your voice. “I’m sorry, I-” 

“No, Emily. It’s my turn to talk now,” you said, making your way towards her. “You bullied me for months just because you had a crush on me?” You asked incredulously. 

Emily went to talk, but you smacked your hand over her mouth. “You bullied me, Prentiss, when we could’ve been kissing this whole time?” 

You found it almost comical how wide Emily’s eyes got, your sentence sinking in. You started to giggle at her attempting to speak with your hand still over her mouth. “Wanna try that again?” 

She took a deep breath, settling her eyes on yours. “Can I take you out to dinner to make up for it?” 

You closed the distance between the two of you entirely, your chest flush with hers. You could feel the quickened rise and fall of her chest, feel her stuttered breaths against your face. You trailed your hand down the side of her face slowly, watching her pupils dilate as you moved down her jaw, across her collarbone, before settling it on the middle of her chest, feeling the rapid pace of her heart beneath your fingers. “I want to hear you beg, Emily,” you smirked. “You owe me that much.”

Emily licked her lips, her smile growing large and sinister. She leaned forward, her lips brushing your ear. “Please, princess,” she emphasized the pet name, almost mockingly. “Let me eat you out. Sorry,” she cleared her throat. “Take you out. Let me take you out.” 

You threw your head back and laughed, full bellied and loud. Your hand lightly smacked at her chest. 

“Next Friday, seven p.m. sharp. Take me out and make it up to me, Emily.” “Yes, princess,” Emily winked.

------

A/N: thanks for reading yall :) I might turn this into a part 2 with smut but idk lololol

[personasintro]

Hi, its me the yapper!! Once again!! 👋👋

I just wanted to clarify something that both you and other commenters seem to have gotten wrong; Whatever I said was incase of the scenario that you’re not feeling the story like you used to, so writing it has taken longer bcs you do not enjoy it as much but you still want to appease the reader. Hence the unwanted suggestions I made.

In my point of view, it seemed that way so I thought it was inevitable that you one day drop the fic because yes we’re getting older and busier and we drift away from things we loved. Thats why I said “is it really that serious?” because you obviously seem willing to keep writing but the wait has gotten so long that it looks like you’re doing it out of obligation(?!).

Looks like I misjudged and I apologise if thats not the case. But it came out of genuine curiosity because I just cant comprehend such long wait. Thats a me problem ig🤷‍♀️

So what I got out of your response is that yes we might/will see the end of mh in like 1-2 years? (more or less)I get that I sound bitter but I promise I am NOT lmao its pure curiosity I promise!!!

Ps to people who said that that was uncalled for or that its serious to me otherwise I wouldn’t have bothered; As I said I am an avid reader of mh so after a reread I thought I could share my thoughts? Like its genuinely not that serious even to me, I didn’t think twice before sending the ask I did it just because the thought crossed my mind. And l believe the whole waiting thing is a fact, so people’s opinions on it are very much called for?

Is it any of our business how long mimi takes to write? No🙂‍↔️. Are we as readers entitled to an opinion as long as we’re respectful? I’d like to think yes🙂‍↕️

Anywayss have a good one yall

i understood what you meant in your previous ask. and i still stand by what i said many times before – i do not hold here anyone against their will and if anyone feels like they're getting older and lose an interest in any of my stories, that's okay and it's their decision to make. i can't be responsible for everyone's feelings of how they feel about this exact situation. that's beyond my control and you're all free to feel however you want. i do wish people would be more understanding and respectful and that's why i said that no one knows what someone goes through. just because i'm no longer totally open about what's going on in my life, doesn't mean i don't care about my stories.

i'm not writing out of obligation. sure, i do feel a certain responsibility to make mh my priority even more than ever, but it's not an obligation. and i wouldn't just drop the story. i said this too, i'll finish this story whether it's for myself or for everyone else as well.

i said this many times before too – i'm in a position where i write whenever i can and want. i do not have any schedule, actually i never had one – but readers were used to more frequent updates and now, of course it's harder to get used to less frequent updates. but that's just life. i apologized when i never had to. my plans was always to finish mh asap (still is) but sometimes things don't go as planned and there are things i don't even have control of.

i respect your opinion and i'm merely explaining myself on this, hope it can be taken with respect and understanding as well!

have a good day everyone ☀️

[midnightsnyx]

girl at home | mat barzal | part 5

pairing: mat barzal x fem!reader summary: you’re eighteen when you find yourself pregnant after Mat leaves for hockey. nearly eight years later, Mat finds out about your daughter and you have to deal with the consequences of not telling him about her.

warnings: swearing, angst, food, fluff, not edited word count: 2.3k authors note: it's my bday tmw and i am going out of town for the weekend so i wanted to get this posted!! also, i have no idea how pr management works so i def got everything wrong so pls don't yell at me lol i feel like this chapter is just like a roller-coaster that went off the tracks and blew up and someones trying to put it back together with tape from the dollar store so im sorry but i hope yall like it anyway and don't hate me pls <3 send your thoughts or come yell at me about this story bc I LOVE hearing from you guys!! It feeds my writing soul. thank u all for the love on this story so far and lmk if you wanna be added to my taglist. also thinking about doing some smau for this fic and wondering if you guys have any ideas or suggestions?

if you asked to be added to the taglist and didn't get tagged it's cause you didn't show up when i searched for you! so shoot me a msg and we can figure it out. also if you want to be added or taken off the taglist please let me know <3

requests are open. masterpost masterlist taglist form ask box

You didn’t think the situation with Mat’s statement could get any worse. You were already being pestered by your mom, your friends and even other parents at the day camps Nora attended. Mostly everyone knew that it was true that Mat was her father at that point so the statement caused questions to rise. Ignoring everybody’s opinions about it was easy but six simple words from Nora were what broke you. 

“I thought Mat was my daddy,” she said softly while eating breakfast one morning. She had been quiet since the day before but it continued when she woke up the next morning. You thought maybe she was just moody and tired but it ended up being much more than that.

It took you a minute to answer, trying to figure out where she might have heard or been told that. It wasn’t that surprising that she might have gotten the impression that he was her dad considering how much time Mat had been spending with the two of you or she overheard a conversation. Kids are very perceptive but you couldn’t see how anyone would directly tell her about the public statement and you had been very careful about what you said around Nora and told everyone else to do the same. 

Apparently someone didn’t get the memo. 

You had two options. You could lie to Nora about what was going on or you could explain it in the best way you could to her. Lying to your daughter was the last thing you wanted to do but figuring out the easiest way to explain it so she would understand was hard. How were you supposed to explain that yes, Mat is her daddy but he was a fucking idiot and told the world that she’s not even though he said he wanted to be in her life. It would have been so simple to take the easy way out but it wouldn’t have been fair to Nora so after she finished her breakfast, you sat her down. 

“You’re feeling a little confused, huh?” you asked, watching her fiddle with a loose string on her sweater. 

She nodded, still not looking up at you and not offering her thoughts. It was a bit alarming because she was usually a chatterbox, even when she was upset about something. She would let you know exactly what was wrong. 

“Who told you Mat was your daddy?” 

She finally looked up at you, and the tears threatening to spill from her eyes made you both angry and upset. You were ready to find whoever told her and scream at them but her answer stunned you.

“I heard you talking to Jaxy,” she whispered. “I wasn’t trying to listen but I was coming out to get some water and you said that you were mad at Mat.” 

She didn’t elaborate on what else she may have heard which was unnerving because you probably said a lot of things about Mat that night when Jax came over to talk to you about it. You hoped she didn’t stay long enough for your breakdown where you had cried for thirty straight minutes. 

She sniffled, wiping a couple tears away. “I don’t understand.”

Your heart broke but you still struggled with how to explain everything to her. Telling her in the beginning was probably a better idea but you were so caught up in your own thoughts and feelings, you ignored the person who should have been your number one priority the entire time. 

“Mat is your daddy, baby,” you said. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you.”

I’m sorry I kept you a secret.

“How come everyone is saying he’s not?” 

Mat should have been the one to answer this question because it was his doing, but you hadn’t spoken to him since the night he was at your apartment and the two of you argued. He had texted you the day after but you ignored it because you didn’t know what you would say when given the chance.

“Well, sometimes people make mistakes and Mat said something he shouldn’t have,” you explained, hoping it was enough and it seemed to be enough at first but then she hugged you tightly.

“I love you mama,” she said and before you could reply, she quietly asked, “Do you think Mat loves me?” 

“I’m sure he does,” you told her and it took everything in you not to cry. 

. . .

Liana: dinner at our place @ 6. bring nora and don’t be late!!!

You’re tempted to decline the request and just stay home but you’ve been promising Liana and Nadia that you would actually visit instead of dropping Nora off and leaving like you’ve been doing. Avoiding Mat is becoming increasingly difficult. It’s been two weeks since he released the statement and a week since your conversion with Nora. She’s been asking a lot of questions, ones that you didn’t plan on having to answer so soon. You expected her to be angry with you for not telling her but she took your confirmation that Mat’s her dad with ease. 

So it didn’t come as a surprise when her first question was whether Mat would be at the Barzal household for this dinner. You hadn’t bothered to ask Liana, mainly because you knew it would definitely impact your decision to agree to go. 

“Did you know that Zoe’s mom and dad aren’t together either?” She says during the drive to the Barzal’s. 

You do know this but you humor her. “Really?”

“Yup. Zoe said she spends weekends with her dad and stays with her mommy during the week,” she explains and then moves on to a different topic. You’re a little curious why she would talk about her friends’ living arrangements but when you finally pull into the driveway, your question is answered. 

“Do I have to stay at Mat’s on the weekend?” She asks and if you hadn’t already parked the car, you would have hit the brakes. 

“No,” you say a little too quickly and sharply because she frowns. 

“How come?”

You don’t answer her question right away, getting out of the car and walking around to the other side. She’s already unbuckling her seatbelt by the time you open the door and she’s still frowning. 

“Just no, Nora.”

“But Zoe does!”

You can’t explain custody agreements to a seven-year-old so you say the first excuse you can think of. 

“He doesn’t live here,” you say, taking her hand and begin walking towards the house. She’s dragging her feet, clearly not happy with your response. 

“Do I have to call him dad?” 

“No.”

“Why?”

“Just ‘cause,” you say, stopping at the door and turning to her. Her arms are crossed and she’s giving you the look that says she won’t let up until you give her an answer she wants.

“Do you want to call him dad?” 

She pauses, looking down at the ground and frowning. After a moment she shakes her head. 

“No, but Miss. Jones says you’re not supposed to call your mommy and daddy by their first names ‘cause it’s disrespectful.” 

“It’s not up to Miss. Jones,” you say gently. “This is new, and you don’t have to do anything you don’t want to.”

After a moment, she mutters a quiet “okay,” and then: “do you think Nadia has ice-cream for dessert?”

“Guess we’ll have to go inside and ask,” you reply and raise your fist to knock on the door but it swings open before you can. Liana is waiting on the other side with a big smile on her face. Nora runs straight to her and giggles when the older girl picks her up and swings her around. 

“C’mon in,” Liana says, ushering you inside. So far there’s no sign of Mat so some of the tension leaves your body. After putting both yours and Nora’s shoes aside, you make your way to the kitchen. Nadia is puttering around, juggling a million things but she still smiles softly when she sees you. 

“Can I help with anything?” 

“You can keep me company,” she says and points to a chair. “Sit down and update me on what you’ve been up to.”

You know that you can’t argue with her so you sit and chat idly with her. She doesn’t bring up anything to do with Mat and you’re not sure what to think about it. You almost slip up and ask if he’s going to be here for dinner but decide not to. You haven’t seen him around since you arrived, so he’s probably out. Maybe with a girl. 

Not that you care, obviously. 

Mike eventually pokes his head in the kitchen to greet you and ask how you’ve been. He offers to set the table but Nadia shoos him out of the kitchen, rolling her eyes fondly. 

“Don’t get married, they’re nothing but trouble,” she jokes but there’s a smile on her face that lingers even after her husband leaves. You always admired their relationship, and were certain that you and Mat would be like it some day but it wasn’t in the cards. 

Soon, Nadia calls everyone to dinner. Nora immediately asks why Mat isn’t here and there’s an awkward silence until Liana breaks it.

“He’s busy,” she tells Nora and that must be enough because she just nods and starts eating dinner. Nothing else is said about Mat but just as you’re all finishing dessert, you hear the door open and close and there’s only one person you figure it will be.  

Mat walks into the dining room, clearly caught off guard by your presence. Nora hops off her chair and darts over to him, wrapping her arms around his legs and starts chatting excitedly. He’s trying to give her all his attention but his eyes keep flickering to you. 

When Nadia and Mike get up to start clearing the table and Liana asks Nora if she wants to go watch a movie, you realize that the three of them planned this. It’s almost like you’re kids again, fighting about something stupid and needing his parents to help fix the problem. 

Mat looks at you a little helplessly when the room clears and it’s just the two of you. There’s no way you can yell at him with his family and Nora in the next room and you realize that was also probably planned. 

“Can we talk?” he asks and you really don’t want to, but you realize that eventually you’re going to have to talk to him so you nod. You follow him out the back door and the two of you sit on the porch steps in silence until you finally break it.

“Why didn’t you come to me about what PR wanted to do? We could have figured out something together.”

He shrugs, looking at the ground. “I didn’t think to ask you about it. I just wanted to fix everything before it got complicated. I wasn’t thinking.” 

“Yeah, no shit,” you mutter. “That’s something you’re great at. You don’t think before you do anything.” 

You jump when he stands up suddenly and turns to face you. He’s angry but so are you.

“No, fuck that. You can’t just expect me to do everything right, when a month ago, all I had to worry about was hockey. I can’t be number one dad overnight! You didn’t even tell me about her for six years!” 

You’re a bit taken off guard by his sudden outburst but you can do anger too.

“That is the exact reason I didn’t tell you about her, Mat. Hockey is always going to come first in your life,” you snap. “And I didn’t ask you to be a number one dad, all I asked was that you be sure you wanted to be in her life before you committed to anything because this is exactly what I was worried about.” 

He falters a little, probably not expecting you to return the anger. 

“I didn’t want to post what they asked me to,” he says, sounding defeated. “But I didn’t know how to say no. When PR tells you to jump, you jump.”

You’ve no idea how public relations in hockey works, it’s possible that they would have posted the statement without asking Mat but you’re so damn angry. You’re angry but you don’t know who you’re even supposed to be mad at now. 

“You should have come to me,” you say again. “That’s how co-parenting works, you know.”

His mouth twitches. “That’s what we were doing?”

You can feel the anger slowly dissipating. Mat’s shoulders aren’t as tense and he plops back down on the steps so you sit next to him, letting your shoulders and knees knock against his.

“Well, you are her dad,” you admit. “And she is very concerned about her future living arrangements.”

He looks at you a little confused but there’s a small smile spreading across his face. 

“Does she know?”

“Yeah,” you tell him. “She’s smarter than you expect sometimes.”

“She gets that from you,” he says, poking your arm.

You roll your eyes fondly. “Well she had to get her brains from someone.”

He huffs but it sounds more like a laugh. You watch him look at the ground, brows furrowed and deep in thought.

“I fucked up, didn’t I?”

Here’s the thing that a lot of people don’t know about Mat: he doesn’t forgive himself easily. It’s something you learned the hard way when you were younger and dating. 

So you know he will beat himself up over this until you forgive him. 

“Yeah, but we both did.” You bump your knee against his until he looks up at you. “We can fix it, but we have to do it together.”

He holds out his pinky finger. ”Co-parenting, right?”  

You hook your finger around his and nod, letting yourself relax for the first time in weeks. It’s going to take time, hard work, and you’re both going to have to learn how to trust and communicate better again but you're sure you’ll get there.

“Together,” you agree.

tag list: @literatureluster @dasiysthings @barzyblogbabe @diary-of-jj @heatherawoowoo @fallinallincurls @topguncultleader @shadowsndaisies @lovinbarzal @whatthepuckisgoingon @alilstressyandlotdepressy @teapartydreams @keiva1000

[chocsra]

if you’re ok with writing for multiple characters, could i request a platonic oneshot with chuuya and dazai x fem!reader who is apart of their “double black” (except ig it wouldn’t be double black anymore) and both mediates their arguments and instigates them? (maybe a snippet of friends to lovers between chuuya and the reader 🤭) tysm have a nice day!

"Unlit Cigarettes stained by Warm Lips"

15! Chuuya x gn! reader x 15! platonic! Dazai

A/N: ofc! yall i should keep my mouth shut bc i make too many promises i cant keep. HALLOWEEN IS SOON BTW AAAAAA

Content: stuck in a jail cell with your unfortunately idiotic subordinates, fluff, crack, mafia work, reader is MEAN, a little romance w chuuya, dazai may be ooc but i like to think that in this kinda dynamic he acts more like a normal teen, slight soukoku, smoking, lots of swearing, NOT PROOFREAD‼️‼️

"Missss.. [Y/N]s smoking."

You slap the lanky boy's shoulder harshly as you shove the cigarette box back into your sleeve, watching as your other subordinate's face contort in surprise as Dazai mockingly whines. "Ow.." he rubs his shoulder with bandaged fingers, the ginger next to him looks at you with amusement and confusion. "Where the hell did ya get that?" he asks, you sulk in annoyance from the whining bastard beside you, "Up your ass." a quiet click of the tongue from the ginger can be heard as you defy his genuine question.

Unfortunately, these two are your subordinates, your partners in criminal work, your associated murderers in the underground business. Even though Double Black is all scary and terrifiyingly violent, you thought they were a pair of funny, immature and idiotic assholes.

Dazai Osamu, a lanky, greasy boy wrapped in bandages, loved dying. Yes, he wanted to fucking die, but he doesn't. You sometimes question his skill of staying alive after that many suicide attempts, but it's alright, you suppose. The mafioso had messy brown hair and wore massive suits that did not fit him and constantly smells like dog shit. He claims he has a silver tongue with women but the only woman he 'has' is the front-desk suicide hotline lady. If somebody ever asked your opinion on him, you would answer.. "He's.. interesting."

Next is Chuuya Nakahara, a short, but strong arrogant boy who is frustratingly brutal. Veeery brutal. He's extremely competitive and takes every minor activity as a sweat-inducing challenge. Karaoke is a pain when he's screaming his ass off, simplistic cooking or baking is horrifiying because this shithead works like he's donating food to charity as if his fatass isn't going to inhale everything afterwards, and any sort of video game was devasting, any one.

He had short ginger hair and stormy azure eyes. His fashion sucked until Koyou, a fellow superior of yours knocked some sense into him. Chuuya had a rather small figure but fairly muscled. Yeah, he flexed his abs (ribs) in the mirror randomly. The boy loved fedoras, chokers and classic, fancy clothing that made girls scream 'DAMON TORRANCE 😍‼️' under his Instragram posts. If someone were to ask your opinion on him, you'd say: "He's an alright guy," with a shrug.

Some dumbass landed you three in jail for a reason you'd rather not speak of, and now you have to deal with the aftermath of waiting for your 'beloved' guardian, Mori Ougai to come bail you three out.

"Mackerel," Chuuya jabs Dazai's side, intensely glaring at him. "Why'd you get the guard's attention? I could've smoked." he hisses, causing the taller boy to snap back at him with an eyeroll. "Nah it's fine, I don't have a lighter anyway." you mediate the tension, boredly playing with the flimsy cigarette box in your hand. The redhead scoffs a little, leaning back in the concrete seat of the jailcell, impossibly manspreading further. "We could use Dazai's hot ass breath as a makeshift lighter.." Chuuya suggests with a smirk, the lanky teenager sassily scoffs, "Or rub pipsqueak's oily hair until it catches fire."

"Like- how would that make a fire?" you retort in amusement, "Have you ever been to a science class?" Dazai and Chuuya shrug in sync unshamefully,

"Was busy protectin' gangsta kids."

"Missed most of middle school 'cause of an attempt."

...

"Fair enough," you shrug back, fixing your hair. "Y'know, Boss is gonna kill us when he gets here." you add on, leaning your head against the prison wall. "I know, I'm not fuckin' prepared," Chuuya copies your movements beside you, loosely throwing an arm around your shoulder. Dazai's eyebrows knit in amusement and embarrassment at the sight, "Pipsqueak, you are NOT smooth." the ginger almost glitches as he flew away from you at those words, now chasing the brunette around the jailcell.

"'Playfighting between you guys is a fuckin' hazard, even for the mafia." you mumble, placing the unlit cigarette between your lips to feel the sensation once more. "This isn't playfighting! I'm gonna kill his ass!" Chuuya pants between missed kicks thrown at Dazai. "That's why [Y/N] thinks you give 'dog vibes'!!" the brunette retorts, bringing up a previous conversation based off you psychoanalyzing your coworkers.

"Why you!-" the smaller boy curses, flying off a wall aimed towards Dazai's head. "I'm not wrong though!!" you fling your arms up in surrender, smiling cheekily as Chuuya rolls his eyes. "After this fuckboy, you're next." You swallow thickly in slight fear. You swore you could hear walls crack and floors thump at the loud commotion, drowning out the poised footsteps towards your cell.

"Sir, are these your children?"

A kind, petite policewoman points to you three fighting like rabid animals. Mori Ougai, your tall, diabolic and terrifiying boss smiles fakely, watching his underlings fight in pure irritation.

"Unfortunately."

The tall brunette immediately halts as the ginger almost decks him in the face. Your hands stay frozen in the air as if you've been caught instigating a chicken fight.

Dude, you are so fucked.

[gt-daboss]

Hello, I am Making a GT comic and Need YOUR Help!

Soooo, as the title says, I am in the middle of making a gt comic, it is probably going to be 6-8 pages long, so quite long lol (at least for me)... SO, i was wondering,

would you rather wait for the whole thing to be done, which would be a longer wait before you got to see any of it... OR:

Release the comic pages AS I finish them, you get to experience them as I experience them, right as they come out. It will probably take me between 1-3 days for each page, im hoping to try and get one out on a 'every other day' but i can't promise (though i REALLY do want to get that schedule, so ill try very hard for yall if we do, i dont wanna leave you hanging if u choose this option!)

Please give any feedback you can, It will be my first time creating a comic online, so if you have created one or have experience in any way AT ALL, please lmk any thoughts, don't feel stupid for suggesting anything trust me I WANT all opinions and thoughts on it! Thank you!

(and if you know anybody who knows about this topic too you could let them know as well~)

[slutttttttttttttttt69]

Why, In my opinion, "Spiracle" is the ideal song for Sebaciel.

In case you are unfamiliar with the song I am referring to, it is titled "Spiracle" and performed by Flowerface.

I've got way too much time on my hands and I'm seriously lacking sleep, so I thought I'd write this thread.

But before we dive in, let me recommend Flowerface.

Besides having this amazing song, they've quickly become one of my favorite artists and have much more to offer than this.

So, without any more delay, let's get started!

WARNING!

I'm just a teenager looking to have a good time, so please don't take any of this too seriously.

So, I came across this song while scrolling through Sebaciel playlists, and boom, there it was.

Since the very first time I laid my ears on it, I couldn't get enough of that tune. It's got this spooky, eerie, yet strangely comforting vibe that fits perfectly with Sebaciel aesthetic.

Little did I know, it was just the tip of the iceberg.

Personally, I'm drawn to music primarily because of its lyrics. So, it was only natural for me to do some digging on them. Let me tell you, I was far from disappointed...

The first verse goes:

I want the parts of you you only show

To the corner of your bathroom mirror

I want the parts of your hand-grenade heart

That beat slowly with anger and fear

Yall can already guess where Im going with this.

This is how Sebastian sees Ciel from his point of view,how he is expressing a desire for intimacy and emotional connection with him.He is asking to see the hidden, vulnerable parts of Ciels emotions and thoughts. The lines about the mirror and heart represent a desire to create a safe space for him, to let his defenses down and open themself up.Personally, I have observed Sebastian's deeper affection towards Ciel compared to Ciel's feelings towards Sebastian.Ironic.

I want the parts of you you only show

To the birds outside your bedroom window

I want the teeth that you lost as a child

That you hide in a box under your pillow

These lyrics express a similar desire for closeness and intimacy, but with a focus on the Ciels younger self. There may be a reference to the idea of lost innocence, and a wish to go back in time to find those parts of the Ciels childhood that he feels he no longer has. The notion of a box which is hidden under a pillow may represent Ciel's feeling of embarrassment over his experiences, or perhaps his lack of acceptance of the past.

YALL SEE THE VISION RIGHT?

I want your quiet, your screaming and thrashing

The salt on your lips and the hands that God gave you

And I want your violence, your silent sedation

Your moon eyes, your telescope, morbid fixation

NOW THIS IS WHERE IT GETS REAL.

Sebastian is looking for the extremes and complexities of Ciel, wanting access to his intense passions, aggression, and pain. The reference to salt on lips suggest Sebastians hunger and desire for physical intimacy, while the mention of morbid fixation suggests an interest in the dark, twisted, and perhaps taboo aspects of the other Ciels psyche.Not to mention the violence part.

Do I really have to explain further? This verse delves into Sebastian's willingness to assist Ciel in seeking revenge, his patience with Ciel's outbursts, his understanding of Ciel's complexities, and his unwavering love for him despite it all.

And I want your pyro, your born-again virgin

Your hands on my insides, your fingertips crawling

And I want your Jesus, your suicide mission

Your lips on the microphone, soft disposition

The lyrics reveal a longing for intense physical closeness and sexual discovery.Sebastian who is eager to delve into Ciel's raw desires and untamed passion, craving deep and intimate connection. The phrase "born-again virgin" hints at a willingness to embrace his primal urges, showing a sense of surrender. And let's not forget the religious undertones - "I want your Jesus" says it all. Ciel's quest for revenge is his suicide mission.

UGH.

And I want your parties, the shark in your water

The scrapes on your knees and the blood that spills over

And I want your zeroes, your polluted marrow

The sweat on your palms and your surveillance shadow

The shark in the water speaks of a danger or threat, while the scrapes on knees and flowing blood speak of pain and violence. The notion of zeros could represent Ciel's emptiness and absence, while the polluted marrow suggests his idea of a loss of purity and sickness. The line about the sweat on the palms and surveillance shadow ties in with Ciel's paranoia and anxiety. All of these themes show Sebastian's desire to experience the full range of emotions and physical sensations, including those that may be difficult or uncomfortable. I LOVE THEM.

I want your secrets, your clementine fields

The ropes that you climb up, the parts that won't heal

I want your safe word, your passive resistance

The sickness you foster, your favorite addictions

Dude. "I want your safe word" HELLO?

"THE PARTS THAT WONT HEAL" !!!!!

ALSO the mention of the clementine fields can refer to Ciel's of innocence and childhood naivety. The lines about ropes represent Sebastian's desire to explore and heal the Ciel's past wounds.

And I want your nightmares, the ghost in your doorway

Your paralyzed sleep and your *scream*

I want you, butterfly, I want you, sailor

I am your lover and I am your jailor

These are pretty self explenatory,thats why they are my favorite.

Just too much paralles.

This is what I see when they say "I want your nightmares,the ghost in your doorway"

Sebastian's perception of Ciel as a butterfly holds significant meaning, symbolizing hope, transformation, and rebirth. Through his affection for Ciel, Sebastian finds hope and undergoes a profound change, shedding his cold demeanor. The butterflies also embody notions of freedom, earthly beauty, love, and the human soul. Similarly, Ciel can be likened to a "sailor" due to his curiosity, yearning for the unknown, and hidden passion. Sebastian, as both Ciel's lover and literal jailor, perfectly aligns with their contractual bond. Bound to Ciel until the end of his life, Sebastian consumes his soul, sealing Ciel to him until the end of Sebastian's own existence.

Alrighty then! That's the complete song for you. Maybe I'll consider doing "Cornflower blue" next. I really hope you all enjoyed this. And hey, I'd be thrilled if you could drop some comments and share your perspective on this. It would mean the world to me!

[seth-shitposts]

a thing that would not leave my mind halfway through my shift.

so I am disclaim right now that I really have no intention on doing something with this, it's just a cool concept that I didn't want to throw away, but... wmsjxhd whatever anyways here you go Kallus and Ezra AU- (aka Defectors AU??)

This is going to be a long post because it's going to he literally everything we were thinking about. So if you're ever wondering what your waiter is thinking about as they are serving you, know that this is a possibility.

If yall have any questions or comments, don't be shy. (I just don't *plan* on touching this because I have so many WIPs and other fics I am now working on. I love what I've gotten in the inbox! I greatly appreciate yall and 100% look forward to them!!!!!) 

Anyways. It took so much longer to record my thoughts than i thought it would so I wasn't able to get much of my actual writing done.

Word Count: 4k+

Tw for this one:  Violence , injustice , genocide , heinous crimes of the empire , vomit mention , mention of separation , non canon-typical of rebels

So the premise of this AU is essential a if Kallus had been assigned to the job of taking in the Bridgers and found the small child. 

What I specifically pictured was that Kallus would be talking the situation over with his superiors. He suggests that they place the kid into one of Lothal's orphanages, or one on a planet nearby. Find him a foster caretaker. One of his superiors suggests instead they enlist him. 

And Kallus goes "????I'm pretty sure this child hasn't even reached the age of 9, what do you mean you want to throw him into an academy?" As Kallus’s own academy experience had been brutal, but he had been 19 or 20 upon entering. The thought of putting a child that hasn't even hit double digits yet into such training, even if at a lesser form, is so beyond him. 

Another superior suggests maybe just bringing him in with his parents. And Kallus’s response is immediate "absolutely not." Because where the Bridgers are going is a rehabilitation center for rebels who have committed crimes against the Empire. A chance for them to learn better and find a place in the empire. They're worse than the academy. 

"Then what do you suggest? Dropping him back in the streets?" 

"I'll take him under my care. I'll teach him everything I know." Kallus says it before he can think about his answer. The foster suggestion had been shot down. He was not going to allow a seven year old child to be dropped into a military academy, a rebel prison, or thrown into the streets. 

The superior that had suggested throwing the kid into the rehab snorts. "You? Oh this is going to be good." 

His other superior shakes his head. "Agent Kallus. You're about to get promoted to the next rank. You won't get that if you do this." 

Kallus nods his head. This isn't something he has to think twice about. "I've already stated that I have no intention of accepting a promotion." 

And so it began. 

Agent Kallus was given custody of the child from Lothal. The first couple of weeks were… rough. The child missed his parents. Nothing Kallus did or said could comfort him except for offering to take him to visit them. The tiny little smile that the kid gave Kallus, the shiest tug at his sleeve, asking him if it were a promise… Kallus could only respond with yes. 

But he did not want to have his only visitations to his parents be of them in prison uniforms, so after hours of negotiating it with his higher ups and with the rehab facility itself, he was allowed to meet with them one on one, set a negotiation with the Bridgers and make arrangements for them to see their son, how they would want to. 

Kallus had expected them to be belligerent with him, or curse him for taking Ezra away or forsake him because they're under a misguided opinion of the empire. But they're very cooperative. Eager. 

Kallus explains to them that part of the agreement his supervisors gave him in allowing this visitation is that they have to put effort into their rehabilitation. 

Mira Bridger chews on the inside of her cheeks for a moment as Ephraim Bridger inhales deeply. The two share a look and nod. They tell him that they accept the terms, but Kallus has to be willing to hear them out. 

The two have been nothing less than compliant and cooperative to him thus far, so he is willing to extend the same courtesy to them. 

Ephraim Bridger explains that there are some people in the rehab that have done nothing wrong other than be in the wrong place at the wrong time, and that they did not have the resources for a proper defense case, and now they are facing years of confinement for it. Mira asks Kallus to see what he can do for those individuals. 

Kallus hesitates. He thinks about how willing one of his superiors was to throw Ezra in here, as just a child. And he knows that some of his colleagues don't always have the best judgment. "I… will look into it. Get the prison to send me their case files and I'll work it into my schedule." 

Ephraim nods, thanking him for his help. 

Mira speaks up, "and one more condition. Please." 

Kallus rubs his neck, he's going to have a lot of extra work for this. But, if it makes a difference. "Yes?" 

Mira Bridger reaches for his other hand, holding him gently in a way that shocks him. "Please make sure Ezra doesn't change. He's so bright, he deserves to keep that light." 

Kallus swallows the lump in his throat as he nods. He sees where Ezra gets it from. "I'll make him my priority." 

So thus, Kallus took Ezra under his wing. Ezra was allowed regular visits to his parents, under the condition they put forth effort and in return Kallus looks into the cases given to him. Kallus can't believe just the sheer amount of oversights that were made. Ones that would have long and permanent effects on these people's lives. He was able to help with most of the cases. Get the innocent bystanders out. Over time it extended over into people who were there because they were pressed into a corner. Honestly, there's nothing they could have done. These weren't rebels. It frustrates Kallus to no end, but the Bridgers seemed pleased- more than pleased for what he has done to help. Kallus is conflicted about Mira and Ephraim. They're good people. They just have a misunderstanding about the empire. It was people like the Bridgers who inspired him into joining the academy, so he could help others. It isn't difficult for Kallus to find balance between this extracurricular, his ISB work, and raising Ezra. 

And raising Ezra. The kid will bring any animal or creature he finds back to Kallus and tell him all about how they met. Kallus just smiles as he listens intently, pausing his data work to do so. The kid honestly is very bright, he shines like a beacon, a sight for sore eyes. Kallus forgot what it felt like to have someone to look forward to seeing. It reminds him of friends he used to know. Vaguely of that feeling he used to have back in coruscant of knowing that he'll see the stars, with certainty. Honestly, he had forgotten what that was like. 

 Kallus was given a flat on Garel, with frequent visits to Lothal, and will take Ezra with him anytime he has to travel. The only time the two are apart is when Kallus has an assignment, or when Kallus feels that Ezra would be in danger by being with him. Mira and Ephraim had told Kallus about a family friend, Tseebo. He stays with Ezra during the times Kallus can't or won't bring the kid with him. 

Ezra also… expresses much distaste for his colleagues. And how Ezra explains it, the kid isn't wrong. But it's simply just how things work in the empire. The kid pouts and stomps about how some of the officers were harassing merchants again. Kallus files a report on it and follows up on every little story the kid tells him. His colleagues truly are an annoyance. Honestly, they have bigger things to worry about. 

Ezra attaches to Kallus’s hip, but more often, his sleeve. And Kallus feels a warmth of endearment wash over him anytime Ezra laughs or pulls a prank or tells him a story or tugs in him. Kallus teaches Ezra some of the skills he learned back in the lower levels of Coruscant. Of course, when Kallus learned them, it was for survival. When he teaches them to Ezra, it's to help him get away with pulling pranks on his coworkers who are still harassing civilians. Since the superiors haven't been taking Kallus’s reports seriously, why not teach the kid how to get away with pickpocketing, effectively use disguises, escaping from a pursuit, and infiltration? Pride swells in Kallus’s chest every time his coworkers complain about a "loth rat who won't stop causing problems for them, but keeps getting away". Some of the skills Kallus teaches Ezra are the same ones he used to take top of his class rank at the academy. The only thing that Kallus takes more pride in than having watched those upper crusts fume over being beat by a sewer rat is watching Ezra take what Kallus teaches him and does better. His little star has a natural talent. 

(And Kallus's heart softens from the way that Mira and Ephraim absolutely beam from the stories he and Ezra tell them. Kallus is still trying to figure out how to get the Bridgers out. They should be let out for "good behavior" soon. He’s been pulling every string he can to see through to it. He's simply fixing mistakes the empire made. Honest mistakes. Right?) 

_____

As Ezra becomes a few years older, his superiors try to press Kallus to put him in an academy, but Kallus says that he will see through to the boy's training himself. And he does. However, for assessments, Kallus does have to bring him to the academy on occasion. Kallus doesn't agree with it, but he is ordered that to prove that Kallus is competent enough to train Bridger by himself while still doing his ISB work and his sudden interest in HR extracurriculars, the assessments have to be done at Coruscant's Royal Academy. Kallus trains Ezra accordingly, but is far more gentle and encouraging than his own trainers had been. Ezra is eager to do well, to be the best to prove that Kallus has done well to teach him. That if they moved Ezra anywhere else, it would be a mistake. 

The first few assessments… well. Ezra does great, amazing, infact. And Kallus makes sure to tell him. But some of the children of high ranking officers feel upstaged by Ezra. And make it very loud and clear that they think Ezra cheated. Kallus defends Ezra, and takes the heat of the situation. 

Later Ezra apologies and tries to ask what he did wrong. 

"Star, don't ever apologize to me for anything. You did what you were taught and you were great." Kallus gives Ezra a smirk as he ruffles his hair, trying to make him feel better. "That's just how they act here. I'm the one who should apologize, in my haste to teach you how to be the best, I forgot to teach you to hide your cards. Don't let them see the full extent of your skills. If they can't find weaknesses, they will make them. So make them think they can find weaknesses. Keep an ace up your sleeve while you count the cards." 

Ezra doesn't fully understand why the other cadets act like that, but Kallus always makes things make sense, even if they don't. 

Ezra follows Kallus’s instructions and does well in his assessments without putting a target on his own back. Kallus tells Ezra not to use his street skills, but the skills taught by the academy. Yes, they are lack luster with not much practicality or room for field adaption, but it's what's be best for now. 

Once Ezra’s final assessment is completed, the two are allowed to return back to Garel. They have another visit before Kallus has to prepare for some major assignment. Something about riots breaking out all over a planet called Lasan. The thought of going to that place leaves more than a bitter taste in his mouth, but he has a duty to fulfill. It's probably just going to be making a few public arrests and enforcing a harsher set of codes that the Lasat will eventually adhere to.

Kallus is hesitant to leave Ezra on his own, but Kallus doesn't want him anywhere near this planet. Riots are violent and he doesn't want the kid to get caught in the crossfire. Or worse. 

During the visit with the Bridgers, Kallus is pulled out by the rehab warden. He is informed that his request to lessen the sentence has been vetoed. 

"Rejected? Why? They're good and honest people. I've seen their progress reports, warden. They've been cooperative. They haven't caused any trouble. They want what's best for others." 

The warden glares at the agent. "Anytime they're allowed to interact with other prisoners, things around here get thrown into disarray. They keep encouraging unruly behavior. They're lucky that you're the only reason why I haven't split them up and placed them into solitary confinement. If they insight another riot, they will be sent to a maximum level camp with no more little family reunions." 

Kallus feels his blood boil. "Maximum Facility? Have you lost your mind? Those two are non-aggressive! They've complied to your every demand-" 

The warden slams his fist on the table. "Agent, your welcome is about to be overstayed. Those two breed rebellion behavior everywhere they go! I'm half convinced they're doing it to you!" 

Kallus shuts his mouth at that. The Bridgers haven't done anything wrong. On fact everything they've done has to been to help other people and to ensure a bright future for Ezra. "How dare you insinuate that I bring about disorder? I've been working my arse off for almost five years to fix the mistakes colleagues of ours have made that got innocent civilians thrown into rehabs, prisons, and slave labor camps." 

The warden narrows his eyes. "Watch what you say, Kallus. You're talking dangerously similar to a rebel. Don't say something you'll regret. If you aren't careful, you could get them executed for bribing and corrupting an ISB Agent, and yourself for treason." 

The warden doesn't even have to say the next part for Kallus to understand. And the boy will be left all alone in this place. Somewhere in the back of his mind, Kallus registers that he hears a metallic thud, but he can’t process anything other than the sound of his own pounding chest.

The warden sighs, letting go of his tension. "Kallus, you're overworking yourself. You need to get some sleep. I understand that you have an incredibly large assignment in a few days. Please don't worry yourself with the Bridgers. I know that you're simply doing your best to establish a stronger sense of order. Sleep on it. We'll chat more next week." 

And with that, the warden dismisses Kallus to continue supervising the Bridger Visitation. When Kallus returns to the room, Ezra is noticeably quieter. His energy… dampened. And Kallus is much the same. The Mira and Ephraim notice and ask, but Kallus shakes his head. But he does say, "I need you to promise me, just for the next few days, to keep your heads down." He whispers so Ezra doesn't overhear. He hadn't told then that he's been trying to get them out. He was fully under the impression that he would, but didn't want to disappoint them in the case that he couldn't. "For every favour I've ever done, please promise me, just for the next few days." 

Mira and Ephraim don't say a word, but they give him a nod. 

Once they return to Garel, Ezra lightly knocks on Kallus’s door. Kallus opens the door with a switch, and the kid looked like he had been crying. Kallus feels a pull at his heart. This is his last night before his mission. "Nightmares woke you?" 

Ezra looks away from Kallus's eyes, not giving a response for a moment. Finally, he nods. Something about it is off, but that's not the most important thing right now. 

"Want to talk about it?" 

The kid shakes his head. 

"Do you want to sleep with me tonight?" 

It takes less than a few seconds for the kid to be crawling in next to him. It wasn't uncommon for them to share a bed, especially when Ezra was upset or simply couldn't stand being separated from Kallus. And Kallus deeply wishes that he had maybe tried harder to get Mira and Ephraim out before having to leave. But there's no time to dwell on what he cannot change. 

He focuses on gently papping away the tears on the kid's face, his cold hand softly sweeping over the hot trails before he starts to brush the hair from Ezra’s face. 

Kallus smiles softly. The unruly hair goes against so many regulations. But, Kallus would rather choke than make Ezra cut it or allow the officers to do so. 

As Kallus sings a lothal lullaby Mira and Ephraim taught him, Ezra inches in as close as he can to Kallus, trying to fight the sleep that's trying to overtake him. 

Kallus has never had any siblings. He never even had the chance to think about wanting them. But the way that Ezra's small fist clenches his sleeve, as if to hold him here… 

It breaks his heart that he has to leave Ezra in the morning. The kid never takes their separations well. So he indulged in him, probably a bit too much, making sure that they didn't happen too often or for too long. It makes him endlessly grateful to Tseebo, to know that he won't be alone. 

____

This is wrong… 

Kallus stands in the middle of a large Lasan village. The disruptor heavy in his hands. He's refused to activate it. This is cruel and barbaric. At first, he had been confused when the instruments were being handed out. He hadn't received any information about the lasat having any type of advanced fleet. So why… 

Kallus  feels sick. 

He had volunteered to be part of the first wave, so he could secretly push ahead to warn as many civilians- civilians, they were attacking civilians- to escape as possible. But… they didn't have many ships. Definitely not enough. 

He used the item in his hand as a defense staff, and deflection only. 

This isn't what was supposed to happen. This is barbaric. No one deserves this. 

Kallus pushes the thought away as he orders his men to push to an area that he saw with mainly warriors, not civilians. He pushes onward, being stopped by an honor Guardsman. Kallus isn't able to back out of the fight, and he refuses to let himself be killed. 

So he's just going to fight until the other runs out of stamina. It feels like hours that he’s in this one on one. The other doesn't give up. 

That's when the star destroyer starts dropping bombs from above, not caring that there are civilians or their own troops down here. One of the bombs causes a pillar to crumble at its base. Kallus is able to move in time to push both the guardsman and himself out of its path. The guardsman recovers from his shock quickly,  trying to sweep one of Kallus’s ankles out from under him, but Kallus deflects the attack and knocks the weapon from his hands. 

What happens next never leaves Kallus. The guardsman stops fighting him and retrieves the staff- the bo-rifle he heard it called- and hands it to Kallus. He doesn't understand. Kallus looks up to the other, and holds out the disruptor to him. The Lasat just glares at the weapon and knocks it out of his hand before running off to fight another officer with his bare hands before Kallus can stop him. Kallus watches as he is immediately hit with the charge of a disruptor. 

Kallus is in a daze as chest rattling screams are let out all over the planet before there's complete silence. 

They're all gone…

This… wasn't to settle rioters. This wasn't even to make an example. 

Who would the example of been for? There's no one else left. Few Lasat would have survived. If any did at all.

And he couldn't do a single thing to stop it. Or even slow it. 

Kallus looks up to Lasan's sun. 

It all happened in less than an hour. 

This was an ambush. 

This was a massacre. 

Kallus doubles over as his body purges the contents of his stomach. 

_____

No one had really paid attention to what Kallus did or didn't do. 

The entire way back, he kept getting fucking congratulated. They were fucking celebrating this like it was some grand victory over a rising rebellion. They think he took the bo-rifle as a trophy for the conquest of Lasan. 

He'll let them believe that. He'll play along with this. Because he's going to burn this house from the inside. 

But first… 

Kallus makes sure to clean up before his return to Garel. The smell of ash and smoke… it makes him nauseated all over again. 

Upon returning to the flat, Kallus sees tseebo out before seeking Ezra. 

Kallus isn't in the flat for much longer than a few seconds before he gets a full-body tackle from the small twelve year old boy. And Kallus returns the hug with the same amount of force. 

"Ezra," Kallus hates what has to be done, but he will not allow the Empire to have any direct contact to him. "I was wrong. I've been wrong for years." Tseebo will look after him. Anything has to be better than the Empire. 

Ezra pulls back slightly to let Kallus kneel to his level. "Alex, what do you mean?" 

Kallus had left all his equipment, even his uniform, back on base. "Your parents were right. The Empire is not what I thought it was."

"Alex, what happened?" 

Kallus shakes his head. "The Empire happened." Kallus is not about to go into detail about what he himself can barely handle. "Ezra, there's something I have to do. And do it, I need to get you to Lothal. And…" Kallus swallows a knot in his throat. "I can't go with you." 

Kallus has to spend several hours consoling and explaining what he can to Ezra without telling him too much. 

"I must remain here. I'll get in contact with people who can help. I'll get your parents out, I'll do my best. Tseebo should still be on Lothal. There'll also be Sumar. But I need you to promise me something." 

Ezra wipes away the last of his tears, Kallus’s cold hands cooling his face as he helps. "Anything." 

"I need you to promise me that you won't tell anyone about me. That when we meet again, if I am still in the Empire, you'll pretend not to know me. Evade the empire using the skills I taught you." 

Ezra goes silent for a moment as he tugs on Kallus’s sleeve. "I promise… but you have to promise that you'll come back. You always come back." 

Kallus can't hold back the smile that the kid pulls from him. "As long as you shine the way you do? Star, I'll always find my way back to you. Your parents will too." A frown seeps in for a moment. "Ezra, I'm sorry that I have to leave you." 

There's a tug at his sleeve. "Don't ever apologize to me about anything." 

______

**notes: 

-Kallus staged that he and Ezra got separated from each other on Garel. As predicted, his missing person reports to the empire went ignored. 

-Immediately after ensuring that Ezra made his way to Lothal safely, Kallus discovered that in the 3 days he was gone, Mira and Ephraim had gotten harassed by some of the guards and led an escape attempt, in which many were able to escape, but they got moved to another facility that he is not allowed access to and to make matters worse, a week later he discovers that Tseebo volunteered for a highly experimental program.

-in this au, Kallus is much more reserved during the first couple of seasons. The entire time he works as a Fulcrum agent. He takes on the task of The Ghost Rebel Cell and intentionally fails to keep any of them from getting caught, as best he can without blowing his own cover. 

-Ezra doesn't tell the Crew about Kallus until they find out. He was very conflicted about finally seeing Kallus for the first time in a few years, and having to act like they were strangers. And then having to not say a word of his old brotherly figure to his new family. 

-after having gone so long without hearing from Kallus, of Tseebo having been MIA, and of still having had no word of his parents, he came to same/similar assumptions as in canon. With Kallus, Ezra holds fear of him getting caught, of Kallus maybe having changed his mind and decided not to leave the empire. Or maybe even that he had forgotten about him entirely.

[gettinshiggywithit]

!Dating Sukuna HeadCanons!

Scenario:-what would it be like to date ryumen sukuna?

Pairing:-sukuna x gn!reader{shell}

Genre:-fluff

Type:-headcanons

A/N:-i hopy you like this @shelly-stark-official! I tried:’)

Okay

SO

Sukuna is a little shit

But its fine cos so are you~

Honestly the fact that the kINg oF cUrSeS fell in love with your devious and scheming self was not a surprise

Especially not to yuuji(poor fella had to share all of sukunas thoughts abt you and while u and itadori were besties.sukuna wasnt um...thinkin of you in a um platonic way)

(Like at all)

So when buddy boi finally asked you out

And although it felt weird um datin someone who shared the same body as your best friend,you got used to it and yuuji learned not to be so awkward abt it too...

And the moment he suggested you play a (borderline sadistic) prank in yuuji,you paused for a sec before agreeing~

And the moment he suggested you play a (borderline sadistic) prank in yuuji,you paused for a sec before agreeing~

(You knew youd be able to use your quirk if something rly badd happened to him)

And lemme tell you ‘kuna fell even deeper in love~

Sometime you and him and yuuji go out for lunch and while yuuji is the one in control,sukuna opens up those lil mouths on yuujis palms and under his eye to talk to you.

You feed him fries and yuuji hates that the grease is getting on his face😭(ples apologise to our best boi 😔)

So many ppl were like legitimately scared of sukuna but to you he was just a little shit and honestly? I think yall’d be cutee together (i wanna be the ring bear! 🐻)

(I think ur dates would include LOTS of scheming but also bitchin,cos this man has THOUSANDS of yeaes worth of tea to spill and hearin abt ancient gossip is still funny as shit🙈)

Now a little on the powercouple dynamic~

I think that while yall would tease and joking insult eachother,if anyone else tried dishing out jabs in your respective directions the other wouldnt stand for it

Like if someone ELSE calls u idiotic,theyre begging for mercy in a second

And if anyone calls sukuna something insulting,you’re basically walkingg them upto deaths door urself

And if You ever mention how this means he cares abt you,he will in fact go into denial and completely invalidate your opinion on the subject

Furthermore if anyone ever speaks badly of the two of you as a couple (i.e. gossiping and such) yall would just completely ignore them

Like who cares if a barely succeeding apprentice sorcerer doesnt approve of your relationship?????

Yh thats right,no one!

And just to piss em off further,i think hed suddenly initiate a particularl Passionate kiss in front of the gossiper.

Suffice to say that shut em up,for better or worse

I dont really think sukuna would ever fully open up to anyone,not even his s/o.but every so often you do catch glimpses of who he is deep down.its usually blink-and-you-miss-it moments but youve caught some

He doesnt really carw about how open you are either but i think itd make him feel special if you are morw open and vulnerable with him.again,he rly doesn’t give a fuck but it just makes him feel a certain way,y’know?

please dont repost my work here as your own on any platform all rights belong to me except that of the characters used,their right belong to their respective owners.but these stories? mine.

feedback,likes,reblogs and comments are so very appreciated tbh :’)i hope you enjoyed and ill catch ya next time!

Comments & Reblogs w/ tags >>>>>>>>>>>likes please

Taglist open for anyone interested!

[freesidexjunkie]

to prove that im not Full Of Shit and that I have indeed been writing and just have not been happy enough with fucking any of it to post, I am going to share the little intro snippet of the Rolan fic I've been trying desperately to write. idk maybe some of yall can shame me into working on the rest of it. rough draft and all so buyer beware below the cut

It is a truth universally acknowledged that an archmage in good standing must be in want of an apprentice. That was what awaited him in Baldur’s Gate, Rolan reminded himself. He would happily sit through this night of drunken merriment if it meant they were finally free to continue on in the morning. Well, perhaps not happily, but tolerably. In his opinion, they had already wasted enough time, cowering in the druid's grove from a few goblins; but Lia and Cal would not be swayed to leave before properly thanking their so-called hero.

“Hells, Rolan. You look far too dour for someone who’s supposed to be celebrating,” his brother said, leaning on a log with a drink in hand.

“I’d rather not end up as a drunken fool by the end of the night. I’m sure you’ll already have that taken care of,” Rolan replied. “Besides, I’ll celebrate when there's a real reason to. All any of us accomplished was being the damsels in distress to a crew of adventurers.”

Lia raised her glass to point at him, swaying a bit as she smiled. “Glowering in the corner all night won't get us to the Gate any faster, Rol. You may as well join us drunken fools.”

“I bet he wouldn't be so grumpy if a certain ranger wasn’t still talking to Ikaron,” Cal said, nudging his sister in the side. He nodded his head in the direction of a half-elf woman a little ways off, who was sharing a drink with one of the refugee guards.

Rolan begrudgingly turned his head to look at Rhiannon, laughing and standing unnecessarily close to the tiefling guard. Not unnecessarily close, he chided himself; she was free to seek the company of whomever she wished. The rest of the camp certainly was.

“She likes the grumpy ones, does she?” Lia said, flashing an unendurably knowing grin at Rolan. He didn't deign to reply, only grunting and rolling his eyes as he turned his back.

He certainly had no expectations of Rhiannon seeking his company out, after the way he had acted. He’d assumed she was nothing but talk and pomp, and had treated her as such. As a result, she likely thought the exact same of him, he imagined. He had done little to suggest otherwise, stewing and grumbling around the grove. A less generous person may have even called it whining - his sister certainly had. But while he sat about worrying and complaining, Rhiannon had acted, clearing the road and saving them all. Rolan liked to fancy himself more than capable of a little skirmish, but that, it seemed, was the difference between them; where he fancied, she did.

“You gonna talk to her at any point, or just keep glaring at Ikaron all night?” Cal asked.

Lia snorted beside him. “Please. He’s been staring at her for daaays,” she said, her drunken drawl dragging out the word. “He's just too chicken shit to admit it.”

Rolan felt his face flush, and lifted his wine to his lips to hide it. “Don’t be ridiculous,” he muttered into the glass.

“Aww, see, Cal? He’s embarrassed,” she continued. “Admit it, Rol. She’s not such a… what did you call her, again?”

“Nothing,” he hissed.

But they remained undaunted. “A meddlesome little goodie two shoes, I think,” Cal said.

“Oh, pardon me for being skeptical of a group of mercenary adventurers,” he replied. He couldn't be faulted for his suspicions. Most people, after all, were only in it for what they could get; she was just the unexpected exception. “I am… grateful for their help, and I will be even more grateful in the morning when we can be on our way.”

“Riiight, that’s why you keep sneaking glances at her when you think no one’s looking,” Lia said with a hiccup. “Why don’t you just admit you think she’s -hic- cute?”

Rolan choked, and he felt his wine go down the wrong pipe. He spluttered, turning his face to hide the creeping blush. In a voice that he hoped sounded unbothered, he answered. “She’s… tolerable, I suppose. I wouldn't go so far as to call her pretty, but–”

“Who said pretty? Besides you, that is,” Cal said.

“Idiots, both of you,” Rolan hissed. “Don't you have anything better to do?”

“Mmm, I dunno, Lia,” Cal said, stroking his chin thoughtfully. “He picks an awful lot of fights with her. Most people don’t pick so many fights with someone they have a crush on.”

The word flustered Rolan even more. Crush? Ridiculous.

“Rolan's not most people,” Lia replied. “For him, picking useless arguments with her daily is practically begging her to f–”

“Enough!” Rolan yelled. Their teasing was relentless. He looked around to make sure they hadn’t attracted any attention as he coolly straightened his robes. “You are both… completely out of line. I assure you, I have no opinion of the woman either way.”

Rather than silencing them, his outrage only added fuel to their snickering fire. “If you say so, Rol,” Cal said. “So, if Rhiannon came over to talk to us, you'd be totally unbothered?”

“Of course,” Rolan answered sharply as he sipped his wine.

“Oh?” A dangerous glint was catching in Lia’s eyes; he saw the wheels turning in her head just a moment too late to stop them. “Then let’s find out! Hey, Rhi–”

[horrorknife]

here it is yall. the famed mary and james tumblr essay that i keep talking about doing

i’m gonna break this up into chunks because it’s just. easier for me to think that way. also wrote this in one sitting so im really sorry if some of it is grammatically horrific or phrased weirdly lol

part 1: james and misogyny

so first off, yes, james’ misogyny is prevalent and actually a bit of a theme throughout the game--this mostly manifests as his struggle with his sexual frustration (as the meme goes). it’s so potent that people who don’t even know anything about silent hill know that a theme of sh2 is sexual frustration.

looking at the bubble head nurses and mannequins, we can see that james’ sexual frustration may have led him to fantasize about the nurses tending to mary. the mannequins are just two sets of legs put together at the hips, which suggests that james sees women only as sex objects. whether or not he was always like this is uncertain, though i believe these thoughts were always present in the back of his mind since...i mean he’s living life as a white man somewhere between the 70′s and 80′s.

more misogyny springs up with maria’s appearance. maria looks facially identical to mary, but she’s got a less conservative hairstyle and shows much more skin, complete with a tattoo on the exposed skin of her stomach. i find maria’s sexualization to be the most in-your-face of all of these examples, simply because her colors are so loud compared to literally everything else in the game--it really gives you the feel that, before all else, james wants to have sex with his wife. this idealized version of her that silent hill provides to him is what he wants from mary. we don’t know much about their marriage prior to the game’s events or mary’s sickness, but it’s possible that she was once a lot more sexually present. i believe this to be true simply based on the fact that their relationship is described as being “very intense” in the first few years before plateauing into a normal, homey love.

part 2: did james really love mary?

of course james loved mary! everything that happens in the game suggests that james loves his wife more than anything. i don’t believe that their relationship was ever onesided or abusive prior to mary’s sickness, and even then, i strongly hesitate to use the word “abusive” in reference to their relationship at any point.

anyway--james’ devotion to mary is the driving force of the game. as far as we know until the end, james got a letter from mary, who has been “dead for 3 years”. when angela tells him that the town is dangerous, james’ response is that he doesn’t really care that it’s dangerous. from what the player knows, james has fallen into a depression so deep that he is passively suicidal and without hope for pretty much anything. the mere possibility of seeing his dead wife is all the excuse he needs to thrust himself into the pits of hell, because that would make any suffering at all worth it.

i would say that, in my personal opinion, the most damning evidence to prove that james loves mary is the fact that he was so distraught by what he did to her that he became delusional to the point of driving back to their beloved vacation spot in the hopes that he would see her again. he has her body in the back seat of his car and is so horrified by what he’s done that he forces himself to forget.

part 3: if james loved mary, why would he kill her?

okay. now we’re getting into the meat of this. i’ve seen people argue that james couldn’t possibly have loved mary because he killed her. this take is problematic because it completely disregards all of the onscreen evidence that suggests the complete opposite. is james a horrible person for murdering his wife? YES! is that what you are supposed to understand about him? YES! silent hill, and pyramid head in specific, is literally punishing him for his sins. pyramid head is a product of his own desire to be punished for his actions, which he realizes at the end of the game.

so, why does james kill mary? let’s dissect the complete situation first.

part 3 part 1: mary’s sickness

silent hill 2 does something very effective (at least in my opinion) by putting you in the shoes of someone who is watching a loved one die in real time from a terminal illness. despite james’ unforgivable actions, the player gets a very close and personal look at what he was going through while watching his wife wither away. james indicates to us that he did as much research as he possibly could about what could possibly be wrong with mary, to no avail.

it’s implied that james stopped visiting as frequently and instead turned to drinking. we’re allowed to overhear mary’s end of a conversation from when he visits, bringing her a bouquet of flowers. mary, at this point, is convinced that she is ugly and unlovable, and above all else, is suffering through a disease that is killing her. she’s frustrated and upset, shouting at james to leave, get out of here, don’t look at her, etc. i’ve seen people reference this as abusive behavior, which, like i said before, is something i hesitate to call it. this is typical behavior from someone who is dying. it doesn’t justify her treating him poorly, but i don’t think james is mary’s victim at all. i don’t think james sees it that way, either--he knows she’s suffering. directly after this, we hear mary break down and apologize. she tells james that she wants to die, for her pain to end, etc, and then quickly takes it back, because as any sick person would be, she is having a very complicated relationship with her mortality.

part 3 part 2: mary’s death

james kills mary when she is allowed to come live at home for a few days because she is clearly nearing the end of her life. james kills her via suffocation with a pillow, directly after kissing her on the forehead. at the end of the game, when james is speaking with mary, he first says that he killed her because he wanted her to be free of her illness, and then backtracks and says that, no, it’s because he despised her and wanted his life back. mary (who is not actually mary, remember, but james’ projection of her) responds by saying something along the lines of, “if that’s true, then why are you so sad?”

since we understand that this is not james and mary conversing, we know that this is an internal conflict that james is resolving by talking it out with his approximation of mary. james’ resentment for mary is not deep; it’s quite common for these feelings to arise in people who have to watch their significant other die when they can do nothing about it. i don’t read this as resentment specifically for mary, rather a frustration with the entire situation that ends up seeing its fruition in the only place it possibly can: the person causing the pain. he can’t be angry at something intangible, so he ends up feeling angry with mary.

this is as true as it is that he also wanted mary to be relieved of her suffering. james did not have one singular reason for murdering mary--he had justified it to himself as both of them getting relief. in the end, this clearly wasn’t what he wanted, but it does speak volumes to his desperation that he actually went through with it. i don’t believe that he thought this would solve anything; i don’t think it was even premeditated. it’s presented to the player that he just wanted both of them to stop going through what they were going through.

james’ instant horror at his own actions (the ultimate betrayal of his wife, the murder of another human being, and the intrinsic selfishness of the act) speaks volumes to me from a character standpoint. i’m not sure how people are able to miss this, but then again, *gestures to the silent hill fanbase*

btw, i wasn’t sure where to fit this in, but mary’s up and downs are clearly reflected in maria, based on how her attitude fluctuates so intensely with james.

anyway: james’ love for mary is ultimately what ended up killing her, because it became unsustainable the worse her situation got. i think it’s worth pointing out that despite everything, james never cheated on her (as far as we are told--though i think if he had done this, it would have been seen or mentioned in the game). also, please don’t come away from this with the idea that i’m defending james, because i’m not--i just think that he actually has a lot of depth and he gets very one-dimensionalized by fans! james isn’t innocent, he’s a horrible person who let his love warp him into a toxic, angry person. this can coexist with the fact that he loved his wife beyond all measure!!!!

i’m not super sure on how to wrap this up but this is...most of my thoughts on their relationship. it’s skewed towards james just because we don’t have too much of an idea of what mary was like but i will defend her with my life because this woman was not abusive, she was fucking dying and lonely. honestly i could say a lot about her, laura, and james as a group but i feel like that’s probably suitable for another post sometime. :-)

[so-many-fandoms-here]

All your NSFW alphabets are so good! Would you please write one for Karube ?

(Yall horny… but thats okay me too :‘D)

Thank you <3 I must admit that I usually don’t write about Karube since he had a girlfriend in the real world but I’ll try my best. This alphabet may be not as detailed as the others. Like I said, Karube isn’t really the type of character I would write about. - As always: english isn‘t my first language blah blah feel free to correct mistakes blah blah

Nsfw-Alphabet

• Characters: Daikichi Karube, fem!Reader

• Genre: smut

• Warnings: explicit content

༺♡༻ ༺♡༻ ༺♡༻

Aftercare: (What they’re like after sex)

He needs a moment until his brain starts working again but as soon this is the case he’ll light himself a cigarette and asks you if you need anything. Lot’s of cuddles after he smoked.

Body part: (Their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

Adores your ass. Will grab it at any occasion possible.

Cum: (Anything to do with cum basically… I’m a disgusting person)

Likes to cum on your stomach or your back.

Dirty Secret: (Pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Can’t think of any.


Experience: (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)

I think Karube had a lot of one night stands before, so he’s pretty experienced.

Favorite Position: (This goes without saying. Will probably include a visual)

Doggy and cowgirl. Likes both equally.

Goofy: (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc)

He’s this kind of goofy that makes you stop worrying during sex.

Hair: (How well groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.)

Tries to keep it trimmed at least.

Intimacy: (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect…)

He can be romantic but he can also be very dirty.

Jack Off: (Masturbation headcanon)

Jacks off rather often.

Kink: (One or more of their kinks)

Has a praise kink.

Location (Favourite places to do the do)

The shower. But would fuck you anywhere else too.

Motivation: (What turns them on, gets them going)

When you act innocent while obviously trying to turn him on.

NO: (Something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Choke you. He’s worried to do it wrong and that he might hurt you.

Oral: (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)

Prefers receiving but has no problem with giving.

Pace: (Are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.)

Fast but sensual.

Quickie: (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.)

Usually down for a quickie.

Risk: (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.)

Absolutely.

Stamina: (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…)

It’ll take a while until he gets tired.

Toy: (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?)

Doesn’t own any but if you suggest it or even own one he will gladly use it on you.

Unfair: (how much they like to tease)

He’s always teasing you at least a little bit.

Volume: (How loud they are, what sounds they make)

He moans rarely. It’s more panting and heavy breathing.

Wild Card: (Get a random headcanon for the character of your choice)

Thought about having a threesome but he’s afraid to ask because he doesn’t want to give you the feeling that you’re not enough or something (because you are more than enough).

X-Ray: (Let’s see what’s going on in those pants, picture or words)

Above average size.


Yearning: (How high is their sex drive?)

It isn’t insanely high but you can definitely say he really likes having sex with you.


Zzz..: (… how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

It depends. Sometimes fast, sometimes it takes a while.