#yaaaaay this event looked fun!!

[crystalninjaphoenix]

The Vault

A JSE Fanfic

SepticHeroes AU: Part 26

First Part | Previous Part

This turned out so much longer than I expected. But I really like this chapter so I don't mind as much and I hope you guys don't either XD It's about 7500 words, though, so be prepared for a long haul. Jackie tries to figure out what to do with the tape the guys found in JJ's apartment, and Marvin stops by with something that might help. Meanwhile, JJ is in prison. Yaaaaay :( This Vault place is a lot weirder than he expected, but at least he's not alone in there. Have fun reading :)

===============

Jackie had never tried calling the police on the Red Line before. He’d never tried calling any number on the Red Line that wasn’t to someone else in the League. But Lorelai told him that police stations could identify a Red Line when it called in and would treat him like a Hero. Even so, he was nervous as he dialed the police’s non-emergency number. Maybe it was because of this new villain. They could clearly access normal phone lines. But surely they couldn’t access the Red Line as well.

Someone picked up on the other end. “Daindover Police,” they said. It sounded like a young man.

Jackie swallowed his nerves. “This is Windstorm,” he said, sounding much more confident than he actually was. “I need to speak to whoever’s in charge of the Puppeteer case.”

A long pause. “Uhhhh... one second sir,” the voice said. And then music started playing.

They put him on hold? What the hell? Jackie didn’t even know police stations could do that. Well, he could wait. This operator was probably trying to call over a supervisor to ask what to do. Which, if the police call center was anything like the call center Jackie used to work at, would take a while.

He tried to relax while the hold music played. He sat down at his computer and looked through the games on there, but nothing really appealed to him. He tried social media, but nothing appealed to him there, either. He opened up some of his comic books but found they just made him nervous. The battles between Heroes and villains in them were once exciting, but now he just thought about how different they were from the events happening right now in his life. The comics never talked about a Hero’s friend being revealed to be a villain, and then that friend’s sister being revealed to be a hero who the friend was just trying to save. 

... You know, maybe the comics were bullshit. With all he’d learned about the League recently, he wouldn’t be surprised to hear they’d taken some liberties with the fights Heroes had.

Finally, the hold music stopped. Jackie had left the Red Line on speaker so he noticed it right away, and quickly lunged over to scoop it up again. “Hello? Windstorm?” a voice was saying.

“Ace? Is that you?” Jackie asked.

“Huh, so it is you. Yep, it’s me, kid.”

“You’re in charge of the Puppeteer case?”

“Well no, but I am on the case. The guys know that you and I have a rapport, so I’m gonna be relaying whatever you said to Detective Michaelson. He’s the lead on this.” Ace paused. “So. Last I saw you, you were really hung up on the trial thing. Is this about that?”

“Kind of,” Jackie said slowly. “I think I’ve found some evidence that the Puppeteer wasn’t... That there’s more to this whole thing than just the Puppeteer.”

“You mean... an accomplice?”

“I-if anything, it points to the Puppeteer being an accomplice. There’s someone else in charge, a, uh—a mastermind behind this. And I don’t think the Puppeteer was entirely willing.”

“Huh. That sounds like some damn good evidence.” Ace was clearly impressed. “So are you calling to make some arrangements for dropping it off, or...?”

“Uh—not yet,” Jackie said slowly. “I-I want to make a backup of it first. But I needed to let you guys know that it exists. This mastermind villain—I-I think they’re called Anti-Virus—might go after it.”

“Kid, if they’re gonna go after it, you need to get it somewhere safe as soon as possible,” Ace explained. “Nowhere safer than the police station.”

“Villains have broken in there before. And Anti-Virus isn’t limited by, uh, physical space. I think—I think they’re a technopath,” Jackie whispered that last part, glancing at his phone and computer as he did so. “A-and this could be... i-it’s risky. I need to make sure there’s backups.”

Ace was silent for a while. Then he sighed. “I’ll see what I can do with what you’ve said. But until you hand this evidence over, the police aren’t gonna act. You understand that, right?”

“That’s fine,” Jackie said. “I-I just want to establish that I have it.” Then, from down the hall, Jackie heard someone knock on the apartment door. Chase shouted something, probably telling whoever it was to wait a minute. “I have to go now,” Jackie said.

“Alright. See you around, kid. Good luck.”

“You too.” And Jackie hung up.

Just in time, too. Chase shouted down the hall, “Jackie! Marvin is here!”

Jackie was surprised for a moment before he remembered that he’d given Marvin permission to come to his apartment to reach him. That was just the day before yesterday, but it seemed so long ago. “I’m coming!” Jackie shouted, putting the Red Line on the dresser and rushing down the hallway.

It was weird seeing Marvin in his apartment. He was standing there awkwardly, shifting from side to side, one gloved hand messing with the zipper on his jacket. Chase was sitting on the sofa nearby. Frosty had clearly been the one to open and close the apartment door, as he was standing next to it and wagging his tail excitedly. Chase whistled, and Frosty trotted over to him, where he received many scratches behind the ears.

“There you are,” Marvin said, eyes locking on Jackie. “I have something for you.”

“Iiiis it in that bag?” Jackie pointed at the bag Marvin had slung over his shoulder. It was gray and made of canvas, completely featureless.

“Yep.”

“Alright, put it down on the coffee table, then.”

Marvin nodded and walked over, Jackie right behind him. He set the bag down on the coffee table and took a couple things out. A black rectangular box, a plastic bag full of cables (or maybe just one?) and a cloth laptop case that clearly had a laptop inside—one of the bigger ones. “Whoa, what’s all this?” Chase asked.

“This is everything you need to copy that tape we found at JJ’s place,” Marvin explained.

“A laptop?” Jackie said doubtfully. “Uh... I thought we were trying to keep it away from digital spaces where Anti-Virus might be able to access it.”

“You’ve just decided to latch onto that name, huh?” Marvin muttered.

“Hey, it makes sense, doesn’t it? Don’t change the subject.”

“Heh.” Marvin grinned. “Don’t worry, the laptop’s been modified. I got all this from the Dismantler and her family. She personally went in and removed the camera, the microphone, and the parts it needs to access the internet. It can play and record video, but that video can’t be accessed through wireless means. The hard drive was also wiped, so there’s no chance of anything already being on there.”

“Hmm.” Jackie raised an eyebrow. “She’s very thorough. Or did you and your paranoia ask her to do all that?”

“Both. And I’ll point out that my paranoia is very well-founded.” Marvin shook his head. “I... realized recently that... Anti-Virus might know who I am. Not the identity I have now, I mean... who I used to be.”

“You mean your rogue Hero shit?” Chase asked.

“Yeah.”

“Well fuck. That’s bad.”

Marvin laughed. “Putting it lightly, yeah. But this bitch made Jameson control me. They made Jameson do a lot. And they have Timekeeper. I’m willing to risk my identity if it means... making things right for the two of them.”

Jackie wasn’t sure what to say to that. He’d never seen Spitfire Cat act so... selfless. Maybe this is closer to who he used to be. “I didn’t know you cared so much about Timekeeper,” Jackie whispered.

“I always thought he—she seemed like a real hero,” Marvin said slowly. Then he laughed. “And she clearly doesn’t like the League, so points for her in my book.”

Jackie rolled his eyes. “Okay, yeah, sure. Anyway, how do I work all this?”

“Dismantler included instructions,” Marvin said, unzipping the laptop case and reaching inside. He pulled out a folded piece of paper, just confirming that it’s there, and then put it back. “She also told me, but I don’t remember off the top of my head. I think you basically have to connect the VHS player to the computer with this special cable and then, uh... record it. And then you can... transfer it to another tape?”

“I’ll figure it out,” Jackie said. “I’m good with video software.”

“He really is, I ask him to edit my YouTube videos all the time,” Chase confirmed. “Also, uh... who’s the Dismantler? Should I know them?”

“No, uh, you guys have never met and I didn’t really talk about her,” Jackie said. “She’s a, uh... vvvvillain?” Uncertainty made that last word longer than it usually would’ve been.

“I don’t think what she and her family does counts as villainy, just crime,” Marvin said. “Besides, she’s only involved because it’s her family, so I don’t think she should count.”

“Isn’t her uncle Pathos?” Jackie asked.

Marvin started, surprised. “Don’t just say that!”

“Oh yeah, Pathos was that big villain, wasn’t he?” Chase asked.

“Yeah, til I whooped his ass and put him in prison.” Jackie grinned. “That was probably my first big battle as a hero. I mean, it was sort of easy, actually, but he had a reputation! That put Windstorm’s name out there. And all the villains I fought after that, holy shit there was a big spree that time last year.”

Marvin rolled his eyes. “There was a spree because you took out a ‘big villain’. When an organization like Pathos’s falls, two types of people appear. Those who want to be the next big thing, and those who were too scared of the local organized crime to cause chaos until it was gone.”

“...oh.” Jackie blinked.

“You seriously didn’t realize that until now?” Marvin snorted.

“Hey shut the fuck up.” Jackie put his hands on his hips. “It’s calmed down now! I handled it.”

“You did do that,” Marvin muttered reluctantly. “Anyway. Gw—the Dismantler also wanted to remind you about the Puppeteer’s mask. Do you still have that?”

“Uh... yeah,” Jackie said slowly. “I mean, after figuring out this guy was a technopath, I wrapped up the mask in a bunch of my spare clothes so they couldn’t really use the cameras or microphones in it.”

“Nice.” Marvin grinned. “Anyway. Dismantler pointed out that the mask could also be a piece of evidence. You just need to get someone else to notice the weird stuff that she did.”

“The weird stuff that pointed to it being controlled remotely?” Jackie nodded. “Yeah... I should take it back to Dr. McLoughlin for another scan.”

Marvin’s expression darkened. “You’re going to... you’re going to take it back to the guy... who messed up the scan in the first place. Even though he should have noticed it. You... you do realize how suspicious it is that he told you the mask was normal, right?”

“It could have been an honest mistake,” Jackie pointed out.

“Or it could be something else.”

“Don’t be so judgemental, bro,” Chase said, speaking up for the first time in a while. “Aren’t people innocent until proven guilty?”

“I—” Marvin was so surprised at Chase calling him out instead of Jackie that he didn’t have a comeback.

“Look, I get it, it’s weird,” Jackie said. “I agree. But I’m not going to go around being suspicious of everyone. I’ll keep it in mind that he did the scan wrong, but until I find proof that he’s... I don’t even know what you’re accusing him of—”

“I’m saying that he’s probably in cahoots with this Anti-Virus,” Marvin interrupted. “Or maybe he even is him.”

Jackie’s eyebrows shot into the air. “Ooookay. That’s a pretty serious accusation. And it’s one that I’m gonna keep in mind, but I’m not gonna jump to conclusions, okay? I’m gonna give McLoughlin a chance to explain what went wrong. He deserves a chance to do that, at least.”

“Not if he keeps tricking you,” Marvin muttered.

“I’d rather be tricked than go around doubting everyone!” Jackie snapped.

“Yeah, clearly.”

“I’m just saying there’s a line!” Jackie shouted. “I can’t think the worst of everyone, okay? If I thought the worst of everyone, we never would’ve found the tape! Because I would’ve written JJ off as secretly evil the whole time instead of talking to him! But he’s not evil, and he doesn’t deserve to be in jail! So I’m not gonna throw someone else in there based on what could’ve been a mistake!” He stopped, breathing heavily. Marvin and Chase were staring at him, gaping. Even Frosty was staring at him.

“Wow... never seen you go off like that, Jackie,” Chase said.

“I guess this whole situation is... getting to me a little,” Jackie muttered.

“That’s... fine,” Marvin said awkwardly. “Um... understandable. Y-yeah. I’m not... I’ll do my thing, you do your thing. I’m not gonna stop you. Uh... you can keep all this.” He gestured at the stuff on the coffee table. “But this is mine.” And he grabbed the bag. “I’ll... come by if anything happens.”

“Y-yeah.” Jackie nodded. “See you around, then.”

“See you.” And with that, Marvin walked over to the door and left.

Jackie sighed. The apartment seemed strangely quiet.

“Hey, uh... Jackie?” Chase said. “I get it about the JJ thing.”

“I just... I-I hope he’s okay,” Jackie said. “He’s tougher than he looks. But they sent him to the Vault. There’s a whole bunch of dangerous villains in there. That’s where they send the biggest threats. I hope he’s okay.”

Chase nodded. “Like you said, he’s tougher than he looks. I’m sure he can hold on until we’re able to get him out.”

“Yeah... yeah.” Jackie would believe that. He had to.

===============

Jameson didn’t remember much of the journey. He knew they traveled across land for a while, and then they traveled across the sea for a bit longer, but the car and boat didn’t have any windows, and so he quickly grew bored. Even though it was uncomfortable to sit straight up with tight handcuffs on, and slightly disconcerting to have people watching him, the lack of stimulation meant he soon fell asleep. 

Was he really worth all this security? He hadn’t caused any trouble while in the police station. Did he really need four different people watching his movements at all times? He thought that, but then he remembered what he’d done, and he understood their caution. A villain who controlled so many people for so long should not be given any leeway.

“Hey. Get up.” Someone shook JJ’s shoulder. He opened his eyes and looked at them. It was one of the League Safety members—people without powers, or with very minor powers, who took care of all the everyday internal threats that Heroes were too busy for. Things like protecting League facilities... or overseeing the transportation of imprisoned supervillains. The LS people wore black uniforms with yellow highlights. Said uniforms included helmets with mirrored visors, bulletproof vests, and utility belts—where their main weapon, a neutrinalin dart gun, hung. But that particular weapon wasn’t necessary. JJ had already been injected before leaving the police station.

“We’re here,” the LS person said. “Get up.”

Jameson nodded, standing up. The LS person grabbed him by the arm, guiding him out of the boat.

So. This was it. Byrthon Vault.

The Vault was situated on a man-made island in the Irish Sea. It was closer to the UK than Ireland but big enough to hold villains from both places. All supers in this part of the world knew about the Vault. They’d heard about its towers and the tall, eight-sided wall surrounding the whole compound. But it was different to see it in person. The wall was a fifty-feet tall barrier of smooth metal, and the towers within rose into the sky like pillars of black rock. Jameson felt dread just looking at it.

A concrete path led from the docks to the wall’s singular gate, sloping up a slight hill as it went. Jameson let the LS person pull him up the way. Another LS guard walked on his other side, and there were two behind him. As they approached the gate—a pair of ten-feet-tall sliding doors with red lights in the center of each—Jameson almost froze up. Actually being here was giving him doubts. The whole thing felt so final. If he walked through that gate, he knew he would never be coming out again. He’d known that the whole time, but the reality of it was hitting him all at once now.

But he didn’t really have a choice, did he? 

If you ever fail and get captured, you are not to say anything about me. You are to accept the full blame and take whatever punishment the law and the League give you. Likely, you will be sent to Byrthon Vault. If you protest this at all, I will terminate her. But if you are caught, I promise you no harm will come to her, and I will work to reverse her condition.

None of his messages with the blackmailer ever stayed on his phone for longer than an hour, but that one had been sealed in his memory from the moment he read it.

They stopped at the gate. One of the LS guards waved at a camera in the corner—or, that’s what JJ assumed that red light was. A panel slid open on the wall. The LS person pressed a keycard to it, followed up by a quick series of taps on a number pad. The camera’s red light turned green, and they went inside.

The area they walked into looked surprisingly normal after the imposing exterior. There was short gray carpet on the floor and white paint on the walls, and a woman sat behind a counter—though the counter was protected by bulletproof glass. “Hi, state your business?” she said pleasantly.

“Transfer from Daindover, Britain,” the LS person holding Jameson’s arm said.

“Right, we’ve been expecting you. Enter your access code there.” She gestured to another number pad sitting on the counter. One of the LS people walked up and tapped in another sequence. The woman typed something on a keyboard, staring at a computer screen. Jameson wondered if that computer was connected to the internet.

He wondered if they knew he was here. 

“Alright,” the woman said. “Jameson Jackson, alias, the Puppeteer?” JJ jumped a little when she said his name.

“Yes, that’s it,” the LS person said.

“Great. Wait here for a moment.”

About thirty seconds passed in awkward silence before a door slid open next to the counter. Two people walked out, wearing uniforms similar to the LS uniforms, though with blue highlights instead and missing the helmets. With them was an older man with a salt-and-pepper beard. Tha man looked at Jameson. “This is him?” he asked.

“Yes sir,” the LS person replied.

“Alrigh’ then. You, Jackson, follow us.”

Jameson hesitated, then walked over.

“Cooperative,” the man grunted. “Good. I’m Daly, I’m in charge here. I hope you’ll understan’ quickly that whatever power you had out there, it’s useless in here.”

Jameson nodded. He felt the urge to laugh for a brief moment before it was suppressed by heavy anxiety. Power? What power? 

They walked through a short hallway to a square room with nothing but two doors and a table that had a handful of items on it. One of the blue-uniformed people—prison guards, assumedly—picked something up from the table. Another neutrinalin injection gun. “Hold out your arms,” Daly commanded. Jameson did so, and the guard rolled up his sleeve and injected him right in the crook of the elbow. Made sense. His last dose had probably worn off.

The other guard picked something else up from the table. A black wand, also similar to something you’d see in an airport. The first put the neutrinalin gun down and took a set of keys from their belt, unlocking Jameson’s handcuffs. “Stand with your arms out,” Daly said. “Don’ make any sudden moves.” Jameson wasn’t planning to. He stayed perfectly still while the guard ran the wand over him.

After that was over with, the first guard picked up a bundle of cloth from the table and shoved it at Jameson. “Get changed in there.” Daly pointed to one of the doors, the one to the left. “I’m told you can’t talk, so knock on the door when you’re done and we’ll start the decontamination process. If you take longer than five minutes... well, don’t take longer than that.”

Jameson nodded. He took the cloth and headed into the other room, a space the size of a closet. He changed quickly into this new outfit—a white shirt, a pale green jumpsuit, and flimsy slip-on shoes—then knocked on the wall.

“Decontamination starting in three... two... one.”

JJ gasped, then quickly recovered when he realized that the robotic voice saying that wasn’t the same robotic voice he’d get phone calls from. But he gasped again when holes slid open in the walls of the room he was in. Jets of mist burst out, smelling vaguely medicinal, and droplets of liquid settled on his skin and clothes. Then a loud WHRRRR started as fans appeared and dried everything. Once the fans calmed down, one of the guards opened the door. “Step out,” Daly called from the room.

From there, the group headed through the room’s other door, down a long set of hallways, until they reached the main area of the prison. The cell blocks. Two of the Vault’s towers were dedicated to them, one for male and one for female. Obviously, this was the male block. It was... bigger than expected. The space was wide open, rows of cells stacked on top of each other, with catwalks reaching the higher cells. JJ counted six floors of cells. Everything was made of metal and plastic, all of it sleek and new-looking. And it was... quiet. So quiet. Pretty much the only sounds were JJ’s and the guards’ footsteps. That... must have been because it was early. Even so, the quiet made the hair on the back of his neck stand up.

They took a lift up to the fifth floor and Jameson got a closer look at the cells. The walls were mostly solid metal, with the only exception being the door, which was made of a clear, bulletproof plastic. He glanced into the cells as they passed, but they were all too dark to see inside. It must’ve been lights out. But even so, was no one awake? Or curious about what was happening?

Soon, they stopped at a cell with a number plate reading 525. One of the guards took a key card from their belt and pressed it to a panel underneath that number. The door slid open. Jameson started to step inside, but Daly said, “One moment, 3117.”

Jameson tensed. Oh. Right. The jumpsuit had the number 3117 on the back and lapel. That must be him. He turned to look at Daly, tilting his head curiously. Instinctively he raised a hand to ask What is it? but then realized Daly probably didn’t know BSL.

“Hold out your hands,” Daly said. Confused, Jameson did so—and suddenly Daly snapped something around his wrists. Jameson started and pulled his hands back. These weren’t handcuffs. There was no chain connecting them. But they were two bands of metal now wrapped around his wrists, each about an inch wide but only a centimeter thick. “Congratulations,” Daly drawled. “You get some extra precautions. Those are magnetic pow-sup bracelets. When powered, that purple ligh’ across the middle will turn on, activatin’ power suppression and snappin’ the bracelets together. So don’ try anything, okay?”

Jameson nodded slowly.

“Good. Now, go on. It’s lights on soon enough, so you won’ get much time to rest before the roll call.” Daly made a dismissive go-ahead type gesture.

And with only a moment’s hesitation, Jameson turned around and stepped into the cell.

The door slid closed behind him. It was dark, but as his eyes adjusted, he could make out the cell’s features. It wasn’t too different from the holding cell back in the police station. The walls were metal. There was a single cot to sleep on, along with a toilet and sink to use. There was a small metal shelf jutting out from the wall close to the ground. Some sort of... table? To use while you’re sitting on the floor? Or was it supposed to be a chair? Maybe both?

Well... there wasn’t much to do in here. So even though Jameson had spent the whole journey here sleeping, he lied down on the cot and tried to sleep some more.

But he couldn’t. Now that he was actually here, the despair he felt was too much. This was really it, wasn’t it? Surely the others would have found the tape in his apartment by now. Surely, if it could be useful, it would have been used by now. Right? No. No, he shouldn’t think like that. Maybe the process was just slow. Everything would work out eventually. He just had to be patient.

But it was hard to hold onto optimism like that in the face of this new reality.

===============

Over the next two days, JJ got used to his new routine. The lights came on in the morning, and then about thirty minutes later there was an announcement over the intercom for roll call. They happened floor by floor, lasting five minutes each. When your floor was called, you had to hurry over to the central meeting area of your floor—which ended up being a suspended platform for floors two through six. Jameson was glad he wasn’t afraid of heights.

After your floor’s roll call, everyone there moved to breakfast. The cafeteria was in a different tower, connected to the two cell block towers by narrow hallways. The food wasn’t much to talk about. Bland, with a weird plasticky aftertaste. Forks and knives were not allowed. After eating, there was a short period where you had to either go back to your cell or go take a shower. Then a maddeningly long period of time later, it was lunch, which was almost exactly like breakfast.

But after that, you were finally allowed to go somewhere other than your cell or the cafeteria. The afternoon was a sort of free period—though it wasn’t really free at all if guards were watching your every move—where you could go to the courtyard, do chores like laundry and cleaning, or go back to your cell. Jameson wasn’t allowed to do chores, as security on him was still too high, but he could do the other two things. After the afternoon, there was another roll call, dinner, another chance to shower, and then, an hour later, lights out.

The routine didn’t bother JJ. Honestly, even the guards didn’t bother him too much. Sure, they were constantly watching him, but he was being watched all the time before this, anyway. Just through cameras instead of in person.

No, what really bothered him were the other prisoners. 

Not because they were intimidating or scary in any way. In fact... it was kind of the opposite. Byrthon Vault was home to some of the most dangerous supervillains in this part of the world. Jameson recognized a good number of them, either from hearing about them on the news or from helping her on her superhero patrols. These people were supposed to be ruthless, merciless monsters. Either lifelong criminals or people who’d done one thing so terrible that they got sent here right away.

So... why were they all so... quiet?

He’d noticed it from the start. The other prisoners barely talked. Only when answering a guard’s question or mumbling to their neighbors during meal times. And once he noticed that, he began noticing other things. They were all so pale—even paler than expected for someone trapped indoors almost all of the time. Many of them had dark circles under their eyes. And others were very thin, basically skin and bones. Some of them swayed while they stood. Some of them slumped onto the tables during meal times. All of them stared at him, but none of them talked to him.

Jameson didn’t know what the fuck was going on, but he knew he didn’t like it.

He spent the free period of the first two days in his cell, but by the third he was so confused and curious about what was going on with the other prisoners—not to mention extremely bored and tired of napping so much—that on the third day, he finally visited the courtyard.

This was a wide open space, octagonal like the walls around the Vault. A mesh net stretched over the entire top of the courtyard—presumably to deter flying villains from swooping in and rescuing prisoners. The middle of the courtyard was dedicated to various sports and exercises. Around the edges were benches and tables for people to sit at. Everything was concrete, metal, and plastic.

Jameson looked around. Like the cafeteria, the courtyard connected to both cell blocks, so some prisoners from the female block were here, too. He’d noticed that they were just as pale and lethargic as the prisoners in his block. So whatever this was, it wasn’t just affecting them.

There were some prisoners playing basketball or trying out the exercise equipment. But it was only a fraction of the people out here. Maybe a quarter of them. Or less. And even then, only a quarter of those people were really enjoying the activity. Most of them were just going through the motions. Sometimes stopping what they were doing to stand there, or even to sit down.

This was really freaking him out. His plan was to go over and ask the friendliest-looking person what the hell was going on, but he wasn’t sure they’d be able to tell him anything. Not to mention how unlikely it was that someone here would know BSL. So, overwhelmed by the strangeness of this situation, he walked over to a bench and sat down.

He was tired. He wasn’t usually this tired. Maybe something about being stuck in one place and bored all the time made him tired. Sighing, JJ tilted his head back and closed his eyes for a moment—

“Hey!”

Then he jumped and opened them again. That was the first shout he’d heard in here outside of roll call. He looked around—and saw someone approaching him. A woman with dark, wavy hair. Not a guard, as he expected. But another prisoner. She had dark circles under her eyes but was otherwise moving with more purpose than he’d seen most others move with. Slowly, he raised his hand and waved at her, unsure what to do.

The woman stopped in front of him. “You’re from Daindover, right? In Britain?”

JJ nodded.

“Did Windstorm lock you up?”

He nodded again.

The woman scowled. “That bitch. Hope someone puts him in his place one day.” She punched her palm. “So. What did you do? Did it hurt him?”

JJ hesitated. Can you understand me? he asked.

She narrowed her eyes. “What is that? Are you making fun of me?”

He hurriedly shook his head. And then he patted his throat, trying to indicate his lack of voice.

“What? What is that?!” She leaned over him, scowling.

This wasn’t working! Jameson tried to show her the scar on his neck, tracing its faint line with a finger.

“Oh, now you’re threatening me?!” The woman grabbed his wrist. “Listen, I don’t know what kind of fucking bigshot you think you are, but these mean you can’t do shit in here.” She shook his arm, indicating the cuffs on his wrists.

He shook his head hard, started to sign I’m sorry but then remembered how poorly signing had gone before and scrambled for a new idea—

“Angela.”

The woman—Angela, apparently—jerked backwards. While she’d been getting up in Jameson’s face, someone else had appeared. Another prisoner. A man this time, wearing the jacket of his jumpsuit unbuttoned and sliding off his shoulders. He had bright red hair, cut close on his right but longer on his left, and—and purple eyes. Jameson stared at them for a second, at first processing their existence and then admiring their dark shade and how it contrasted the man’s brighter hair—and then he snapped back to his senses. Who was this guy? He looked vaguely familiar. “Soren,” Angela said curtly.

“What’re you doing?” Soren asked calmly.

“This bitch was threatening me!” Angela glared at JJ.

“You mean him doing this?” Soren mimicked the motion JJ had made to indicate his scar—which, JJ is now realizing, looked like the ‘I’ll slit your throat’ gesture people made to threaten others. “I think he was trying to show you that scar of his.”

Angela looked back at JJ, staring at him closely. “Well before that he was making all sorts of hand signals! Probably being fucking rude—”

“He asked if you could understand him,” Soren interrupted.

“How do you know that?!”

“Because I know British Sign Language when I see it. I could translate for you, if you let go of his hand so he can talk.”

Angela looked at JJ... and reluctantly let go of his hand. 

“Right!” Soren said cheerfully. “So what was the conversation?”

“Asked him what he was in for,” Angela mumbled, sounding almost embarrassed.

Soren looked at JJ, who quickly started signing, I ended up taking control of a couple hundred people in my city and got them to commit various crimes. Including storming several buildings belonging to a tech company.

“Jesus, this takes forever,” Angela muttered.

Soren, meanwhile, looked intrigued. “Oh. So you’re the mind controller who came in from Daindover, huh? Is Windstorm still the hero there?” JJ nodded. “Hmm. Wonder if he’s gotten any better. He had the power, but was pretty new to it when I was there.”

Angela’s eyes widened. “Wait. Wait, he’s the—the string guy? Puppets guy?”

Jameson looked down, hiding the guilt on his face, and nodded.

“Oh. Oh, holy shit. I guess I should’ve, uh, realized. Uh—” Angela stood there for a moment, then abruptly turned around and left.

Soren watched her go, then looked back at JJ. “Don’t take it personally,” he said. “Angela isn’t dealing with this well. She’s always had a temper, and now being stuck here and feeling shitty all the time has made it worse. And I think she’s not used to feeling vulnerable. After all, Angela Lewis is the invulnerable Titanium.” He chuckled a bit, then sat down next to JJ. Now that he was closer, he could see how thin and pale he was—pale to the point of being practically paper white.

How do you two know about me? Jameson asked.

“We’re both from Daindover too. Word gets around about new arrivals, and people always listen up for their city.” Soren looked at him and smiled tiredly. “Anyway. What’s your name? Not your alias, I know that. It’s okay to spell it out.”

JJ did so, introducing himself as Jameson Jackson.

“Alliteration. Fun.” Soren held out a hand for a shake. “Soren Moizone. Nice to meet you.”

...oh.

Jameson suddenly realized why he looked familiar. He’d been on the news quite a lot. And that’s not all. A memory flashed through his head, vivid and real, of a past conversation.

I don’t get it. You could easily take down Pathos, Dahlia. Why don’t you? “Because as long as people like us keep him in line, things are better.” I still don’t get it. “If you suddenly take out the head of a big organization like that, the power vacuum can be worse than they were, y’know? See it all the time in comics about Heroes’ early careers. Everyone rises up to take their place.” So you’d rather fight him every month? “It’s not really a fight most of the time, I just show up and look intimidating and he’s like ‘pack it up, you lot, we’ve gone too far.’”

Soren Moizone. The supervillain known as Pathos. The man who’d held crime in Daindover and the surrounding area in his grip—until a year ago when Jackie defeated him.

“Ah. There’s the look.” Soren’s easy smile faded a bit. “The realization. Listen, I can’t really do much in here, unfortunately. Neither can you. Or anyone, really. I think we’re all the same in the Vault. But up to you if you want to be on speaking terms.”

JJ hesitated. Then he reached out and shook Soren’s hand.

Soren laughed. “You have balls, Jameson Jackson. Though I guess that’s evident, from what you just said you did. Daindover really has a problem with mind-controlling villains.”

It’s not really mind control, JJ said. My powers, I mean. It’s... body control.

Soren tilted his head. “Hmm? What’s the difference?”

I don’t hypnotize people, JJ explained. When the strings wrap around their wrists, I can move their bodies with my thoughts. They’re still aware. And it doesn’t just work on people. Anything shaped like a human can be controlled. I used them on dolls when I was a kid. His parents had been mildly surprised the first time they walked in on him putting on a show for his twin. But not too surprised. It ran in the family, after all.

“Fascinating. You’re right, that’s not really mind control, is it?” Soren mused. “But to be fair, mine aren’t, either.”

JJ blinked. Can’t you make people think the way you want them to?

“Common misconception. I don’t influence their thoughts, just their feelings. It’s not the same thing at all, no matter how much people on the news told you it was.” Soren chuckled.

JJ raises an eyebrow. That doesn’t make it any less dangerous. Another brief snippet of a conversation flickered in his mind.

“I swear, James, I’d never felt so scared in my fucking life before. If the feeling hadn’t stopped when I paused things I would’ve been frozen. But instead everyone else was frozen, ayyy. I suppose powers like that don’t work on me when I’m out of time.”

“Well you’re one to talk, aren’t you, Puppeteer?” Soren pointed out. “I overheard some guards chatting about what happened in Daindover. They were shocked. Though it sounds like the rumors were a bit exaggerated.”

JJ tried to laugh in agreement, but he couldn’t quite manage it. Silence fell between them. Jameson turned his attention to the rest of the courtyard and tried not to think about the fact that Pathos—a lifelong villain who she often fought—was sitting next to him. Though as he looked around, it did remind him of why he was out there. Can I ask you something?

“You can ask me, can’t promise I’ll answer.”

Everyone here is so...quiet, JJ said. And... tired. I don’t know how to describe it. But that can’t be normal, can it? Or is this just what it’s like in all prisons?

“What were you expecting?” Soren asked. “Did you think there’d be a riot every day? Like a TV drama?”

I thought there’d be conversation, at least.

“No, you’re right.” Soren’s face turned very serious. “This isn’t normal. How long have you been here, Jameson? A couple days?”

Three days, JJ said.

“So you’re going to start feeling it soon, then.” Soren leaned forward, resting his arms on his legs. “Have you noticed that weird taste in all the food? It’s a sort of... artificial taste, like someone put plastic shavings in everything. That’s neutrinalin. It can be injected or consumed. All the food for the prisoners has heavy doses of it.”

JJ nodded slowly. He’d been wondering that. Nobody had pulled him aside to give him a neutrinalin injection since he arrived. And yet, he still felt his powers out of reach when he tried to find them. Not to use them, just to see if he could.

“Now, neutrinalin is all fine for the short term,” Soren continued. “But if it’s in your system for too long, say three or four days straight, you start feeling a bit sick. Like a bad cold. And until the neut is out, that feeling will just keep getting worse.”

Dread pooled in JJ’s stomach. And yet, he still had to ask, Did you say N-E-W-T?

Soren laughed. “It does sound like that, doesn’t it? No, ‘neut’ as in short for ‘neutrinalin.’ It’s slang. Sometimes people call it ‘the muffler’ too, or ‘the League’s best friend.’ Guess you’re not in those circles, huh?”

JJ shook his head.

“Anyway. The reason why all these great and powerful villains are walking around like zombies is because they feel like shit all the time. Some of them for years straight. I think Havoc Cry has been in here the longest, you don’t see her around often cause she’s too tired to leave her cell most of the time. Which—look, I’m not gonna say she doesn’t deserve it after she basically destroyed London, but... no, I’m gonna say that. She doesn’t deserve it. She deserved to stay here for the rest of her life, just like Avalanche, Dr. Rundown, Death Angel, the Mutilator—” Soren pointed out each villain as he said their name. Jameson had heard of all of them, but he wouldn’t have recognized them like this. “—and most of the others, but the drugging is a bit much.”

Jameson covered his mouth, hiding the horror on his face. All these people... Sure, criminals and villains, the worst of them, but... he couldn’t help but feel terrible about it as he saw them all in this state. Does the League know about the side effects? he asked, looking back at Soren.

“Dunno.” Soren shrugged. “You don’t hear people discussing it, not even in the underworld. Some people in here mutter that the League made it that way on purpose, but I don’t think so. I think they just never thought about it during development. And if they know what’s happening in here, they don’t think fixing it is worth it.”

Jameson shook his head slowly. This was awful. People must not know. If they knew, they’d be horrified.

Soren looked doubtful. “Would they?”

Of course! Even the Heroes would be horrified. Or at least... Jackie would.

“Maybe.”

Jameson scowled. He made to stand up—but stumbled as a wave of dizziness overcame him. He started to fall, but Soren quickly stood up and caught him before he hit the ground. Thank you, he signed shakily.

“Don’t thank me, it’s not needed.” Soren helped him stand upright again. “Let me guess. Everything started spinning?”

That must have been one of the side effects. JJ went pale as he realized that everything was just going to get worse from here on. He nodded slowly. Why are you handling this sickness better than anyone else in here? he asked.

“That’s not something I’m keen to share.” Soren smiled, a bit of mystery to his expression. “Now. If you’re standing up, I’m guessing you’re leaving?”

JJ nodded slowly.

“Try to come to the courtyard as often as you can. Sunlight and fresh air’s good for you. Makes you feel a little better. I’m here most days. Or we could try to meet during meal times—if you want to meet, that is, but I’d love to hear from you some more. Talk about how things have changed in Daindover.”

That would be nice, JJ said. He knew he had to take this chance. Talking was a lot less boring than napping, but not many people in the Vault would be able to understand him. Soren knew BSL. And even though he was a supervillain, so was everyone else in here. So was Jameson. Soren seemed nice, at least. And... he liked the way he smiled.

“Great. I can try to find you. What floor are you on?”

Floor five, Cell 525.

Soren raised an eyebrow. “They put you up high. The higher your floor is, the more dangerous they consider you. I’m on floor three, in 316. So it sounds like I’ll have to wait for you in the cafeteria.”

I don’t know if I’m flattered or not that they think I’m so dangerous, JJ said, frowning.

“I’d be flattered. But they’ll probably move you down later if you don’t cause trouble.” Soren smiled tiredly. “In any case. Later, then?”

Later. I’ll see you around?

“Certainly. Goodbye for now.”

JJ waved a goodbye as well, then turned and left the courtyard. He hadn’t spent much time there, but he needed to be alone. He needed to think about everything that just happened. About what he found out.

He was still hoping that somehow the others outside would figure out a way to get him out of here. But that hope was starting to waver. Especially knowing what was to come with the neutrinalin side effects. But... at least he wouldn’t be alone in here.

At least there was that.

[emeritus-fuckers]

Yaaaaay ministry event!!!!

1. Would you say you're more likely to be a Sibling of Sin or a Ghoul? Why?

Sibling of Sin. Im weird but still within the bounds of humanity. I would likely end up in ghoul dens though, I would be fascinated with them.

2. Which Papa would you prefer to work with? Why? (Sister Imperator is included)

Outside of my personal feelings for each one, papa 3. He seems the most... personable. Im a little anxious and sensitive, i feel like it would be easiest to work with him or papa iv as a back up.

3. Are you an introvert, ambivert or an extrovert? Tell us a bit more about it.

Ambivert. I love being around people but I need my quiet time at the end of the day. I like parties, for example, but I keep to myself during them.

4. What chore do you like the most/hate the least?

Hate the most? Dishes. I have sensory issues and wet food makes me want to peel off my skin. Like the most? Laundry. I love the smell of clean laundry and knowing i have clean underwear lol.

5. Do you like to travel, or maybe you prefer to stay at home?

Both, for different reasons. I love seeing new places and going fun places (I like to identify new plants and birds) but honestly it's a relief to come home to my own bed.

6. Freebie. You've got five sentences to tell us anything you want about you.

If I could live in a natural history museum, I would. The smell of incense is comforting. I find myself staring at people a lot, I don't mean to, but I prefer watching to interacting. I crochet a lot, and make scarves for just about everyone I know. My goal is to be a tattoo artist.

This post is part of the 1250 (I think?) followers Role in ministry event. Entries for the event are now closed.

Your role in the ministry is…Tattoo artist for the clergy

You work for Papa III

Terzo is happy for you to spend a lot of time in the chapel as he knows you like the smell of incense. He suggested you crochet there when it isn't being used for anything else. He'll sit with you and write his sermons but you often end up people watching. Terzo's favourite game is to watch then tell you who is going to get together next, he loves match making. He is very happy when he gets it right.

He'll invite you along to all the parties he goes to but he always understands if you want to miss one.

He will set you up with someone if you ask or he is also really good at introducing you to the perfect people to be friends with.

He nudged you towards the Ghouls because he knew you wanted to see the dens. He made sure Omega kept a very close eye on you so nothing bad happens and you aren't allowed there unless Omega is around, because, well you know what Ghouls can be like.

But you are one of their favourite siblings, they often offer to help at your tattoo parlour, they helped you set it up. Although sometimes they cause more chaos than actually helping. But it's always good natured and fun but sometimes they do need to be gently reminded to calm down. Swiss once tried to tattoo and obscene image on Sodo when he fell asleep.

You made Terzo and his Ghouls scarves and they all were really happy with them. Terzo wore his around the Ministry with great pride right up until summer when he was too hot. He is now looking forward to autumn.

You also made friends with Primo, on your lunch breaks you go and sit in the gardens to identify the plants and birds. Primo saw you and his eyes lit up that someone else appreciated things like that. He has sooo many books on it that he lends you and, he'll often join you for a walk round the garden showing you all the new plants he put in.

You do get some rather interesting requests for tattoos. There is a wide variety of different artworks asked for, some more serious and intricate others because someone lost a bet...

~

Written by Nyx

[moonrisecalamityretreat]

Komori Enchantment

The mood of the group is strained to say the least. Certainly, none of the motives given so far have been kind, but this one puts you on a certain, grating sort of guard. There is no beast hunting you all down this time; instead, the beasts are your fellow captives, and you just might not know it. But someone does. Someone out there knows something terrible you’ve done, and maybe you’ve found them, maybe they’ve reached out, maybe you’re still in the dark. 

That’s why the sudden appearance of a flier on the bulletin board is so surprising. Bright and colorful, it proclaims:

“Join us for the first ever Once Upon A Starlight Evening Gala! Hosted this evening in Komori Land! Wear your sparkliest, fanciest clothes to a night of dancing and snacks.

Hope to see you all there!”

Maybe you decide “What’s the harm?” or maybe just simple curiosity wins out. Whatever the reason might be, you eventually find yourself walking down to the park dressed in the finest clothing that you own (or have had shoved onto you unwillingly, in some cases.)

The sight that greets you is bright and welcoming – a dressed up Loic and Mio, who are standing a short distance away from the Komori Land ferris wheel… And somehow, it looks like even Angeline and Diabelle made it for the event?

"Yaaaaay, you made it!" Mio cheers, clapping her hands at the sight of everyone looking so fancy.

Loic gives you all a grin and a wave with his free hand, “Thanks for joining! Things’ve been kinda tense lately, so what better way to try to relieve a bit of the stress than with a fun party? A little collab between teams!”

"We're also totally gonna be celebrating Hayato-san's swift recovery while we're here! So let’s all have fun tonight, okay? We've got food and drinks and maybe there'll even be some fireworks later if you're all behaved!" Mio says with a wink.

Not much else to do than get the night started, is there?

[thatsrightdollface]

KamiHaji Week Prompt One: “Ship Day”

Every Year (Honest)

Mizuki visits Unari beneath her ocean, long, long into the future. 

Ships: Mizuki/Unari (One-Sided), Mizuki/Nanami Momozono (One-Sided)

Post-Canon.  About 1,500 words.  I’d give this a “G” rating, too.

Other Relevant Tags: Loss, Friendship, Hurt/Comfort, Ice Cream.

(Thank you for reading, if you do, and sorry for anything I got wrong!  Happy KamiHaji Week~~~!) 

Ao3 link! 

He was coming to see her, in those dripping dark halls beneath the Okinawan Ocean – soon, now.  Unari’s insides tangled, thinking on it…  Reminding herself, so that she ran webbed fingers through her hair and scrubbed bits of clinging seaweed from between the scales of her winding tail. Fidgeting.  Expecting.  He’d made his promises to her years before – plenty of children had been born and grown into their human lives since he’d spoken them.  Every year, Mizuki came to visit Unari’s caves and corridors, her slow-brewing Water of Evolution and ageless, sharp-toothed smile.  Every year, whatever had been happening at the shrine he served.  Whatever had been happening in all that strange, too-fast world beyond the deep.  

               Sometimes he came with a batch of his sacred sake, humming to himself and content…  Possibly a little drunk, already.  Sometimes he came wearing strange clothes from a human store and carrying gifts from the mortal world beyond.  The tissue paper stuffed around those gifts would be only a little damp after his trip through her sea, in that case.  Unari wouldn’t have expected anything less from a divine water snake familiar.

               And sometimes…  Later on… Mizuki came with his eyes red and stinging, because his human love was growing so frail, so fading, and he could pour out all his cleansing holy powers – gather all sorts of cryptic medicine – and still not save her completely.  Human creatures weren’t built to last long, after all – especially if they were determined to stay human and die a human death.  But Mizuki would come check in, even so, and smile for Unari as though he thought she was wonderful.  Say it was good to see her, and truly, truly mean it.

               Unari actually believed Mizuki meant it, anyway, which was no small thing for someone who’d lived as many lonely, doubting centuries as she had.  She hadn’t gone around with her face eternally hidden in a long time, but of course she remembered what the world looked like through a ghostly film… Through a veil, yes, but more through her own clouded sense of self.  Unari couldn’t help but remember the way her mother had taught her to be ashamed of her dragon blood, ashamed of her stark horns and face half scabbed with scales.  Maybe she would always remember, and it would well up inside her sometimes like a hateful, simmering tide.  

               She would have good days, and bad.  She would feel like her best self, and she wouldn’t. That was a gift her childhood had left for her, and Unari had told Mizuki about it a little bit from year to year to year.  Feelings came and went like tides, and he understood, she thought.  He would accept her whatever sort of day it was, and knowing that always helped her look into her own face again.

               Unari had offered her arms to Mizuki without questioning it at all, when he came with his eyes red and his voice shaking a few years back…  When he had hospital phone numbers saved in his contacts list and very little experience with the passage of mortal lives.  He’d crumpled into her for just a second, face against the crook of her neck and shoulders shivering as if the world were freezing around them, though Unari knew it wasn’t.  He took in a long, watery breath, and Unari held him as well as she knew how.  It was the way she’d held him a couple times before, by that point, and the way she’d once been afraid she would never be able to hold anyone in all her time on that earth.

               This man had nearly been her husband, Unari’d thought, without really meaning to.  If she hadn’t released Mizuki from their agreement.  If she hadn’t seen that love and want and pain he felt, churning beneath the smoothed-out surface of him.  Beneath fangs and sharp venom-green eyes, beneath holy purpose and the word of his god.  Mizuki felt all those things, even still.  Even now.  All those things for some bright-eyed human girl.  

               Unari held Mizuki as long as he needed to be held, and thought about how they might have been married.  Might’ve been together all the time.  She reminded herself not to think about any of that, of course, just as soon as she remembered to.  It could only hurt, after all.  

               And then the moment passed.  Mizuki was propping himself back up, soon enough, and offering a story about something strange that had happened on his way to her corner of the world.  His human love had asked him to keep smiling if he could, he’d said, and Unari didn’t think he would’ve let that smile slip for just anybody.  

               Every year Mizuki showed up, and Unari tried to meet him with seashell ornaments pinned in her hair– like the one she’d made as a child, before her mother reminded her why she shouldn’t be seen.  Mizuki would compliment her for that, she knew, and his voice would go all breezy and tender.  So different from the way he’d taunted the former wild fox, Tomoe, egging him into spectral fire…  So different from how he spoke at the foot of Lord Mikage, his newest god.  Mizuki’s easy manners changed Unari’s home for a while, no matter what.  His laughter lit everything up, at least so far as she was concerned, like river water catching in the sunlight.

               And then, of course, Mizuki left.  Back to Mikage Shrine, riding along the spine of that winding white freshwater serpent.  Waving to her over his shoulder or making a heart with his bent fingers, tender and gentle and gone.  He had his place, and she had hers.  He had snarky quips to make about the goings on back at Mikage Shrine and she had an ocean to keep as pure and deathless as she could.  Sometimes he stayed for a day or so, and sometimes he stayed a bit longer… But not usually.

               And yes – yes –

               Maybe Unari wished things could be different. Wished it somewhere deep and real inside herself, like magma bubbling into a vein of heat and want beneath the pitch-dark sea.  Maybe she was still hoping for a change.  

               Hoping that this time of all times, Mizuki would lean in so much closer to her.  Maybe now he’d brush his cold fingers against hers and learn what wanting to stay with her tasted like...   Maybe he’d lick his lips before murmuring something new – before changing things between them.  He would taste the salt of that place, then, the way Unari always, always tasted salt. She was an ocean-born creature, after all.  

               This man could’ve been her husband.    

               It was hard not to remember that, sometimes, even as Unari tried to shove the thought away.  

               Mizuki could have learned to live beneath waves, beneath salt wind and whale song and coral palaces constantly growing, becoming new. It wouldn’t have been just a visit, then, and it definitely wouldn’t have meant so many goodbyes.  They could have had something eternal.  

               But that wasn’t what Unari was going to ask for, when Mizuki came to see her again that year.  At the beginning, she’d asked him to stay with her plenty of times.  Over and over again. She’d hinted that he could change his mind and become hers whenever he wanted.  But now?  

               Now, Mizuki brought ice cream when he dropped by – it was a human food his second goddess… (his mortal love) … had taught him about.  He gave Unari a choice of different flavors, voice so airy and familiar she felt her heart in her throat.  He propped his cheek on his palm and listened to her talk through how her year had been; he brought photos of the forest around Mikage shrine to show her, and photos of human shops and gardens and a shimmering city that seemed to grow stranger all the time.  So much glass!  You wouldn’t be able to escape your reflection for long in a place like that, wherever you went.  It was possible Unari wouldn’t have minded too much, if Mizuki had been there with her, though.  It was possible she wouldn’t have minded much at all.  

               He brought photos of his mortal love’s great-grandchild, too, that little thing who called him “Uncle Mizuki” just the same as the child before her, and the child before that.  He smiled, fond and sad, flipping through those pictures…  He smiled like he knew Unari already understood whatever he could say.  And she thought maybe she did, after all their years together.  

               Now, Unari just asked if Mizuki would like to attend a party with her while he was staying beneath her waves…  One of those galas her mother had never wanted to take her along to.  You know. She knew he could say yes to something like that in good conscience, and a knowing little grin might slither over his face like a shared secret.  

               Mizuki could’ve been Unari’s husband, sure, but what they had was honest.  That was important.  That was theirs.  And maybe Unari would vow to get him home before his Lord Mikage started hinting that he was taking an awfully long time away from the shrine, next – and maybe Mizuki would do an impression of Tomoe the former wild fox scolding him for shirking his duties.  It had been a long time since Tomoe had done a thing like that, but they’d laugh together like Mizuki’d gotten lectured just yesterday.  As if he’d been lounging around waiting for the stars to come out or reading a novel or something when the fox decided he was supposed to be cleaning dishes.  Unari thought she could do a pretty decent impression of Tomoe’s voice by that point, too.

               They’d go inside together, then.  Maybe he’d even notice how carefully she’d polished her scales.

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 282: Aizawa Defeeted

Previously on BnHA: Oh my god do we even care about that at this point. Tomura made a speech; Gran Torino died; Deku lost his shit and tried to strangle Tomura to death with his bare hands; Ryuukyuu came back from Wherever She Was and tried to grab Tomura but he punched a hole through her giant hand; and now he’s grabbing his Quirk-Be-Gone bullets and is ready to cause some mayhem okay?? That about sum it up?? Is anyone even reading this?? CAN WE JUST GET ON WITH IT I’VE WAITED AN ENTIRE WEEK.

Today on BnHA: Well I guess let’s start with what doesn’t happen: Bakugou doesn’t lose his quirk. HE LUCKED OUT!!... for now, anyways. Because, thanks to a near-impossible-to-predict series of events (seriously, raise your hands if you had “Aizawa gets shot but goes full World War Z on his own ass” on your bingo card), Tomura has seemingly regained his regeneration powers, which means that his other quirks are probably back online as well! So we’ll see how that all goes. Anyway so in the meantime Shouto’s back, looking very mad that everyone temporarily forgot he was a main character. And Gigantomachia is back as well! Or almost, anyway. Also, you’ll never guess who broke another one of his arms! Go on, guess. But at least he still has the arm, though, which is more than we can say for certain other people’s limbs. Poor Aizawa is literally on his last leg. He and Tomura really got off on the wrong foot. He chopped his leg off, is what I’m saying. It’s that kind of chapter folks.

you guys I’m losing my whole fucking mind. I straight up deleted the tumblr app off my phone for 24 hours so that I wouldn’t be tempted to log in and risk potentially being spoiled. and I’m happy to say that it worked! so here we are now, completely spoiler free, and let me just say that if Horikoshi decides to cut back to Gunga Mountain now, I will either cry for hours or abandon the series forever and go do something more productive with the rest of my quarantine like learning how to play sad songs on the guitar

all right. here goes

so we’re opening with Deku, who is currently comprised of 100% rage and 0% mercy, and is doing that thing where only the whites of his eyes are visible. and basically he’s just thinking “I’VE REALLY GOT TO HOLD ON TO THIS GUY AND MAKE SURE HE DOESN’T DO ANYTHING ELSE HOMICIDAL.” which is a solid game plan, but perhaps not so easily accomplished

-- oh my god this poor kid is still in denial, I can’t. why are you doing this

is there even still a Gran Torino to tend to at this point? after Tomura bulldozed a hole through his torso, and you went and finished the job with your own fucking attack? sob

but I guess the law of Tragic Shounen Mentor Deaths mandates that Gran’s should be at least as drawn-out as Nighteye’s was, though. so he’s probably only Mostly Dead, which is still Slightly Alive if I remember my Princess Bride correctly, and I think I do

so now the rest of these stooges are finally catching up with us here

yes, my friends. a bullet. WELCOME TO MY LIFE FOR THE PAST FUCKING WEEK. anyways I have a LOT of pent-up energy here just fyi. there may be a lot of unnecessary screaming in this recap

FUCKING WYOMING SMASH Y’ALLSSSS

I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT JUST HAPPENED SOB. DID HE JUST HAMMER FIST TOMURA’S HEAD INTO THE GROUND. DID HE SNAP HIS FUCKING NECK AT 100%. IN AN IDEAL WORLD HE WOULD HAVE JUST CHOPPED TOMURA’S ARMS OFF WHILE SOMEHOW MANAGING TO AVOID BREAKING ANY OF HIS OWN BONES IN THE PROCESS, BUT I HAVE A FEELING THIS SITUATION WILL NOT BE RESOLVED IN ANY KIND OF MANNER ONE WOULD CONSIDER “IDEAL”

(ETA: fun fact: this attack did absolutely nothing except make things approximately 100x worse. but you tried Deku. you tried.)

THE FUCK KIND OF PORTENTOUS BULLSHITTING TITLE IS THIS. OH MY GOD, I DON’T EVEN KNOW WHAT EMOTION I’M HAVING RIGHT NOW, IT’S JUST A LOT OF LOUD THOUGHTS

anyway so if you’re just joining us, Tomura just pulled two bullets out of his pocket, the good guys finally noticed, and then Deku did a smash and everything exploded. the radius of this attack actually looks wide enough to have potentially involved Aizawa, who probably does NOT want to get any debris in his eyes right now, and also Gran, who probably doesn’t particularly want to be hit by another deadly attack for the third time in the past ninety seconds. anyway so I guess what I’m trying to say here is WHAT WAS THE POINT OF THAT YOU LITTLE GREEN LUNATIC

AHHHHHH

he got the one!! the one that was in Tomura’s right hand!! but what about the one in his left ahhhhhhh

(ETA: lmao at Kacchan being the one to blow up the same bullet I was so sure he was going to be shot with. saw the writing on the wall, huh kid? what do we say to the god of foreshadowing?? ‘NOT TODAY.’ ...except that we’re still not actually out of the woods yet so you still better watch yourself lol.)

...

based on the font here, these are Tomura’s thoughts. which he is thinking immediately after getting the lower half of his jaw very painfully cronched by the VERY homicidal sixteen-year-old still clinging to him. anyway so Tomura’s thought processes are as inscrutable to me as ever lulz

and Deku’s arm looks broken again, yaaaaay. but at least it’s his left arm and not his right! so that’s nice. now they can match

[SHRIEKS]

HE YEETED IT. IT HAS BEEN YEETEDED. HE DID A YEET. [sobbing] he DiD a YeEt oH my GOD

DID IT HIT SOMETHING!?!?!?

my reading process here is as follows: 1) scroll down exactly one panel. 2) scream even though absolutely nothing has happened yet. 3) WRITE THAT DOWN 4) REPEAT

DKSFJLKHSDLGKHLI

DID IT HIT HIM!?!? DID IT GET HIM IN THE LEG SOB ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS. JUST LIKE THAT?? BOOM GUN BULLET LEG!!?

YOU GUYS IT REALLY HIT AIZAWA AND NO ONE DID A GODDAMN THING?? it wasn’t even drawn out or anything??? it just HAPPENED, within like four pages??? NO SLOW MO?? NOT EVEN A REACTION PANEL WHAT THE FUCK

son of a bitch I would so dearly like to grab Manual and RockLockRock’s heads right now and just conk them together real hard. YOU STUPID FUCKS sob YOU HAD ONE JOB!!! IT REALLY WAS JUST ONE!! AND YOU WERE SHARING IT!! SO IT’S MORE LIKE HALF A JOB!! AND YOU STILL COCKED IT UP IN ABSOLUTELY NO TIME AT ALL OH MY GOD

(ETA: they should blow this panel up and make it into a t-shirt and make Manual and RLR wear the shirts every day for the rest of their lives. half a job, you guys. please go away I cannot even look at you right now.)

FUCK MY EVERYTHING

(ETA: I still can’t figure out if this horrific angle is due to the earlier damage from the Noumu, or if Tomura really just flung the bullet THAT hard. honestly I’m surprised it didn’t just slice right through him with that kind of velocity. “no thanks because then I wouldn’t get to write a scene where he chops his own leg off” oh okay well when you put it that way, Horikoshi.)

if I recall correctly this is the leg that he said was “twisted”, no? yeesh. might just want to chop it off real quick, then. s’not like it’s doing you any more good. does anyone know if zombie rules apply or not with this sort of thing?? shit

?!?!

“THANKS”?? okay what. did it hit him or not??

-- oh my god WAIT. WAIT. WAIT. WAIT. WAIT. WAIT. WAIT

I WAS -- I WAS JOKING I -- FFFFFFFFKJK

jesus fucking christ. when I said “might just want to chop it off real quick” literally FOUR PARAGRAPHS AGO, I can tell you that the one thing I did NOT expect was for Aizawa to be all, “you know what, that’s a good idea”, and then YOINK OUT HIS TRUSTY HERO SHANK AND GO FULL 127 HOURS ON THIS BITCH. "LALALA WE’RE GONNA DO IT RATIONALLY TEEHEE” like excuse me, the fuck

anyways. I don’t even know what to say. thank you Aizawa’s leg for your sacrifice, and for always supporting him. literally. oh my god I came here ready for my son to enter a new phase of character development, and for the manga as a whole to enter a new phase of glorious, glorious angst. no one told me I’d be sitting here making puns instead. what a fine, confusing day

anyway though let’s just fucking hope it worked. and side note, if Aizawa Shouta really did chop off his own fucking leg just now and somehow STILL managed not to fucking blink, I think we might as well just go ahead and hand him the Biggest Badass In The Series award right now because no one is ever going to top that. nope. not happening

it is truly a testament to Shigaraki Tomura’s unfathomably mysterious sexy villain energy that he still somehow manages to look hot with only half a face

also no one in this manga actually feels pain, do they. not Deku, not Aizawa, not Tomura, no one. no wonder none of them have any self-preservation instincts to speak of

um

did someone just randomly explode just now. at this point it might as well happen, right

oh it’s the shockwave from Deku’s Wyoming attack, apparently. how nice of it to have a delayed reaction for absolutely no reason

anyway so Deku’s being flung back, but he’s grabbing onto Tomura again with Blackwhip. but oh shit you guys, if Tomura escapes Deku and Ryuukyuu’s clutches and still has any bullets left in his pocket, we may still be able to salvage this Bakugou quirk situation after all. would be nice to be able to actually do something with all of these “happy quirk losing day” balloons that I ordered

(ETA: actually, believe it or not I honestly like this better. Tomura using AFO was always the more dramatic option anyway. and now that we’ve done the bullet thing everyone has presumably let their guard down again, which, good.)

I love how Tomura apparently hasn’t noticed that Aizawa’s just amputated his own leg? to be fair he’s probably distracted by all the explosions and such

also gotta love how Deku’s arm-breaking attack seemingly just made everything worse for no reason. and also how Manual and RockLockRock are once again just standing there doing absolutely nothing

SO NOW GUESS WHAT’S HAPPENING

I MEAN IT! GUESS. BECAUSE YOUR GUESS IS AS GOOD AS MINE LOL

OH WELL OKAY THEN

just like we all saw coming!! ...

so is this Endeavor’s attack?? Bakugou’s?? either way, hot damn. fortunately for Tomura he is apparently operating under the same guidelines as the U.S. Federal Reserve, in which mutilated bills may still be exchanged at face value if more than 50% of a note identifiable as United States currency is present. basically as long as roughly half of him is still vaguely Tomura-shaped I assume he’ll be fine

(ETA: in hindsight I should have immediately been able to identify this as a Shouto attack based solely on how murdery it was lol.)

OH MY GODDDD

KRANCH?!?

OH MY GOD LOL WHAT. LOL. REMEMBER EVERYONE’S THEORIES FROM LIKE TWENTY YEARS AGO LOL. SHOUTO WHAT THE FUCK. DID YOU STOP FOR DRIVE THRU

AND MEANWHILE DEKU’S BACK ON THE SCENE GIVING ARGUABLY EVEN LESS FUCKS THAN BEFORE, IF SUCH A THING IS EVEN POSSIBLE. SO FAR THIS CHAPTER HAS PRECISELY ZERO THINGS THAT I ACTUALLY EXPECTED IN IT, WHICH IS VERY IMPRESSIVE

IT ALSO HAS A LOT OF SMASHING

a LOT. of smashing, guys. feels like... 60% smashing, 20% severed legs, 20% Kranch

-- oh no oh SHIT oh shit oh shit

(ETA: um so I really can’t tell how far that wound extends and whether or not Aizawa still has his right eye, shit.)

first of all how did Deku get here next to Aizawa when he was just over there with Tomura, what. and second, I think Aizawa just blinked, oh shit. probably on the verge of passing out after CHOPPING HIS OWN LEG OFF which STILL hasn’t been acknowledged yet?? did I just completely misinterpret all of that back there or what

(ETA: there was seriously so little attention called to this that I scrolled back up to confirm it probably like half a dozen times. apparently Horikoshi thinks that THE MOST BADASS THING TO EVER HAPPEN IN THE MANGA should be completely downplayed. whereas if it were me, there’d be an entire two page spread of JUST THE LEG. WITH MUSIC PLAYING. EVEN THOUGH IT’S A MANGA.)

YEPPPPPPP. fuck

look at him though. he’s so happy. this is why I can’t stay mad at you no matter how deranged you get you little maniac

so is quirk-stealing back on the menu then or what. don’t think I’ve been lulled into any kind of false sense of security by any of this lol

-- ARE WE SERIOUSLY CUTTING AWAY

so Todoroki really went after them ALONE. the better to put his dad right back up at the top of the Lose Your Quirk Sweepstakes finalists. well... second-to-top, maybe. like I said I will not be lulled

yuh-oh

why do I feel like the odds of Gigantomachia arriving to herald the end of this chapter just shot up DRAMATICALLY

so the next page is almost entirely just a list of cities that the news anchor is telling people to evacuate because they’re in Machia’s path. along with a bunch of dead heroes lying around everywhere, and Ochako being all ominous

(: weren’t they, though? heh. this is going to be so, so bad (: (: (:

-- fuuuuuuuuuuu

aaaaaand that’s it. hahahaha. okay then let’s summarize

Bakugou defied all expectations and kept his quirk (FOR NOW)!

Aizawa cut his own fucking leg off and it WASN’T EVEN REMOTELY ACKNOWLEDGED FOR REASONS I CAN’T UNDERSTAND (R.I.P. AIZAWA’S PRECIOUS LEG. YOU ALWAYS PUT YOUR BEST FOOT FORWARD)

Kranch showed up after 157 years and is probably wondering why the heck I keep calling him “Kranch” now. THINGS CHANGE WHEN YOU’RE MIA FOR A WHILE MY LITTLE STARBUCKS CHRISTMAS CUP

Deku broke his arm for the 78th time

Tomura regenerated but seems to think Aizawa’s quirk is actually gone for good, which I’m pretty sure it’s not. so if they can keep him from destroying everything long enough for Aizawa to turn it back on again, we might possibly still survive this

and lastly, Machia is about to kill all of these stupid people frolicking around outside of this fitness club who are probably so proud of themselves for not being glued to their phones 24/7 because they prefer to LIVE LIFE IN THE MOMENT, THANK YOU VERY MUCH. well that’s on you my friends. at least it’ll be a quick death. ffff

[razorblade180]

Rosebud part 14

Some days go by fast. Other days go by incredibly slow. For Ruby, it was the ladder. Deep in the woods of Anima she sat on the porch of Ren and Nora’s orphanage with kids around the age of ten circled around her in amazement as she told them stories of her adventures. Each one more amazing than the last until the Sun was setting on the crisp winter day. Funny, she’d never particularly loved the cold but lately it was so inviting. Most likely because she was in comfy sweatpants and being pregnant made her body feel like she was a furnace. The phrase bun in the oven never felt more real. Soon it would be over though. In fact, it would be considered a day over cooked right now.

Ruby:Ok, story time is officially over.

Children:Awwww!

Little girl:But I wanna hear more about the food fight!

Little boy:Yeah! Also how do you ride a locker. I wanna try!

Ruby:Hehehe, now, now, I gotta save stories for later. Plus I bet Ren is almost done with dinner. Don’t wanna miss that now do we?

Children:Okay….

They all slumped down with puppy eyes. Ruby wasn’t naive. She’s seen this tactic; she might as well be the inventor of it. Yet it was working on her!

Ruby:Tell you what, wanna hear the song I sing to my baby? It’s practically one of the few I can actually sing well.

Children:Yaaaaay!!!

Ruby:*clears throat* Dream of anything. I'll make it all come true. Everything you need is all I'll have for you. I'm forever, Always by your si-

The front door opened and Yang came walking out with baby Kovu in her arms. The little guy has gotten pretty big in just about a year. He was wearing a black onesie and enjoying being swayed.

Yang:Ren says dinner is ready for you little ankle biters. You have five minutes to get to the table if you want dessert.

Terror spread on the children’s faces before they ran inside.

Yang:Wash your hands!

Ruby:Look at that. You have one kid and now you know how to master them all.

Yang:I think you’re forgetting who helped raise you. If anything, you’re my first child Ruby. It’s actually very comforting seeing it like that.

Ruby:It’s also emotional and I’d appreciate it if you didn’t make me cry. I’ll need all the energy I can muster when this little procrastinator decides to be born.

Yang:Like mother like daughter.

Ruby:Ah! I don’t remember giving you this bedside manner when you were blown up like a balloon. Kovu, your mom is being mean to your aunt.

Kovu does nothing but giggle and wiggles his ears.

Ruby:Fine, take her side.

Yang:He knows better than to upset his food supply. Soon you’ll be on straight solids mister and I can be free.

Kovu looks at Yang for a moment in silence. She’s a bit stunned that he might’ve understood that. Then Kovu starts tugging on her tank top and Yang’s eyes squint at him while Ruby chuckles.

Yang:I don’t think he likes that idea.

Ruby:He’s a simple boy. Boobs are his life.

Yang:Don’t lewd my son or I’ll make fun of….whatever gender your kid is. Why can’t you be a normal person and know ahead of time.

Ruby:I like the surprise. Nora knows but that’s because her and the nurse here have done basically everything. I’m surprised she hasn’t told Jaune.

Yang:He still on patrol with the others? He should really be right by your side.

Ruby:I wish he was but we agreed keeping these woods safe is top priority. Can’t afford to get careless; not this time.

Ruby rubbed her stomach slowly as she remembered a time very similar to this. Hard to believe it’s been three years. Even so, the ache still felt somewhat fresh. Yang reached out and rubbed her shoulder. A comforting smile eased Ruby’s worries and she returned the smile genuinely.

Yang:Now is the time to look forward. Wouldn’t want your anxiety to harm the baby. Aren’t you the one usually preaching about hope?

Ruby:Yeah, the curse of being a good leader strikes again. All my advice coming right back at ya.

Yang:Gotta bring it up all the good ones so you’ll remember it for your little one.

Ruby:My little one had to come out first! I’m tired of being pregnant Yang.

Yang:Yeah I went through something a little similar. Due date was coming soon and this little guy stopped being as active. I started eating ice so the cold stirred him up. Ghira even tried spooking me into labor. Oh! Let’s try that. Kovu, scare your cousin.

Ruby:You’re so ridiculous sometimes.

Yang crouches down to Ruby’s belly and holds Kovu to it. His tiny hand reaches out and starts tapping it.

The two sisters laugh at his attempt.

Ruby:Sorry Kovu. Good atte-

Yang:Ruby?

Ruby:Yang...go get the nurse and Nora.

Yang:*eyes widened* Really!?

xxxx

Out in the woods, Jaune makes his rounds around his designated area like the others. The only thing distracting him from the cold was the thought of his wife. This was all for her safety and peace of mind and for that reason alone, he’d put up with anything.

Jaune reached for his scroll and brought it up. He checked on his friends' aura levels. Still high; little to no fighting has happened then. That’s all he could ask for.

Jaune:Everyone okay?

Blake:Yep

Weiss:Naturally.

Qrow:All clear.

Raven:Not so much as a beowulf on my side.

Tai:Really? I’ve killed like five.

Raven:Stop worrying about everything and they might stop seeking you out.

Tai:Mmmm nope. I need the exercise anyways.

Jaune:You need any help?

Tai:I’m just fine. Don’t worry about me for one second.

Qrow:Says the worry wart. Besides, I think you have something coming your way kid. Can you see the sky?

Jaune jumps on a branch to see above the treeline. What he saw was plumes of black smoke and the sight of birds fleeing the scene. ”Someone’s killing grimm? In my area?” He said, confused. ”Who could be out here besides-”

His heart sank to his stomach and he gripped his tight. Without a moment of hesitation, Jaune darted towards the scene. “I’m checking it out now. Everyone be ready for the worst.”

“Roger!” They all said with conviction in their voice.

It didn’t take Jaune long to get where he was headed. Each step he took brought growls and the familiar sound of metal striking bone armor. ‘It’s not them, it can’t be them. We took every precaution.’ He kept telling himself as he slowed down and crouched into the shrubs. ‘Relax Jaune, don’t get impatient. Observe and go from there.’

He took a deep breath and parted the plants in front of him. There was a forest clearing. Dozens of Ursa laid fading away while a massive one stood on its hind legs and roared. Below him was a figure in a cloak. Jaune could only see his back but it was easy to see how worn out the person was.

The cloak was all covered in dirt and their shoulders rose and fell with an intensity that could only mean deep breathing. Still it looked like they remained calm. Their stance low and poised as their hands ready their cane to the side. Wait, Jaune recognized that cane.

The Ursa slammed its weight to the ground and a shockwave blew cloak back along with the person. Jaune popped up from his hiding spot. “Ozpin?” The figure turned around. Yep, it was him.

“Hello Mr. Arc. How-“ another roar interrupted the headmaster and the Ursa charged. Ozpin was caught off guard.

“Look out!” Jaune screamed as he cloaked himself in aura and rushed over there almost as fast as Ruby. He slammed his shield right into the Ursa’s head; making it stumble back. He kept up the momentum by spinning forward and chopping the head off in one swipe.

Ozpin:Nice form. Oh how far you’ve come.

Jaune:Oz, what are you doing out here?

Ozpin:I thought that was obvious. Killing grimm like the rest of you. She’s almost due, right?

Jaune:H...How did you know we were here in the first place? This was supposed to be tight lipped.

Ozpin:It is. The only one who was supposed to know I was here was Mrs. Rose herself but as you can see, things got a bit messy.

Ozpin took a knee and held his head down with his cane supporting him. If it wasn’t for the eye and white hair, He’d looked exactly like how Oscar did after training.

Jaune:How long have you been out here?

Ozpin:Not too long. About a month.

Jaune:A month!?

Ozpin:Yeah. That Ursa Major was number 257 by the way. All the office work is making me rusty.

Jaune:You know if the other’s saw you here then they might have some choice words with you right? I appreciate you being there for Ruby but your agreement-

Ozpin:I’m well aware. It’s why I’ve been trying to remain inconspicuous. This isn’t me trying to build good karma and I have no intention on asking anybody for anything. If anything this should be my way of thanking you all for your years of service and making sure you can continue living life the way you want. It’s the least I can offer. Besides some advice.

Jaune:I think I’m a little old to be your student.

Ozpin:Hardly. Humanity might as well be kids compared to my age. You’re never too old to learn regardless; you’ve all taught me many things for example. I’m grateful for that.

Jaune:....Fine, lay it on me professor.

He sat down in front of his old professor to humor him. Oz couldn’t help but smirk as he stood up like he was about to give a lecture.

Ozpin:This part of Anima is known for slow moving grimm that are spaced well enough apart that the success rate of a traveler running away is pretty high in comparison to other places. I imagine that is one of the reasons why the orphanage was built here.

Jaune:That’s right.

Ozpin:Not a bad idea. When I arrived, I killed thirty grimm at most in my first week. Next week they were more agitated and mobile. Makes sense; Mrs. Rose was here and so were you. Childbirth is an anxiety filled event that happens by nature. However, the grimm kept showing up by the dozens and I got very busy as you can see. Which means...

Jaune:More people showed up? I knew that. Practically everyone is here by now.

Ozpin:Yes but you have to think a bit bigger than that. More people showing up isn’t the problem. It’s everyone who showed up is on edge and attracting the grimm; you all are causing the dangers that you’re trying to prevent. No doubt you could handle them together but if it wasn’t for me then at least half of you would be needlessly exhausted. That would be a real problem if a grimm of frightening destruction showed up, or a rogue maiden out for blood.

Jaune felt his heart stop for a moment. Oz was right. He’d been so caught in his head that instead of being proactive like he thought he was being, he was actually just reacting to his own fears. The only reason the plan was working was because everyone was more than skillful to handle most problems.

Oz walked over to Jaune and got him on his feet. He put away his cane and rested his hand on Jaune’s shoulder.

Ozpin:Strength and diligence are very important but not the most important right now. You all have that in spades. I bet there’s a million things on everyone’s minds right now. All valid fears no doubt. Give them a chance to get it all off their chest. A leader protects the mind along with the body. Just you do as a husband, and just like you’ll do as a father. *smiles*

Jaune:You think that highly of me huh?

Ozpin:Well you are the one who has done the most growing. Then again, that’s only natural seeing how you were….let’s say a late bloomer.

Jaune:That was almost a complete compliment.

Ozpin:Hehe, my fault. You know, I never had a son but looking at former students like you and Ren really makes me feel like…

Oz’s words trailed off and he stopped speaking. Instead he stood right in front of Jaune and examined him thoroughly. Hair, clothes, frame. He’d really grown from his first day. Jaune looked a little embarrassed and confused as Ozpin nodded and smiled with what seemed to be pride. Then, he walked off. Jaune said thank you and got only a wave goodbye. Class was dismissed.

Jaune almost wanted to call out to him but stopped; his scroll ringing nonstop like an alarm. Everyone was messaging him. Yang most of all. ‘How have I not noticed this?’ He thought answering Yang’s call.

Jaune:Hey what’s-

….

Jaune:RIGHT NOW!?

xxxx

Yang:Yes right now! I know we had this system in place but I think you should be-

Ruby:AAAAAAAHHHH!

Yang:I think you should be here for the birth!!!

Jaune:I’m on my way! We all are.

Yang:What about-

Jaune:I’d Cinder wants to show up then that’s her death wish. We’ll handle her together.

He hung up before Yang could even respond. The girl sighed to calm herself before looking over at her sister. Ruby was sweating bullets on a hospital bed they have gotten earlier. The nurse was going back and forth with clean attire for the baby and making sure Ruby’s vitals were okay. She’d been healthy all through the pregnancy but better safe than sorry. Natural births could get tricky sometimes.

Nora had the honor of actually being the person delivering the baby. She’d done it more than anyone around and it was showing. Her face displayed laser focus on the task at hand and she was dressed in proper hospital attire except for her hair which was pulled back into a bun. Truly she was the rock Ruby needed right now.

Nora:You’re doing great Ruby! Keep it up!

Ruby:Agh, you...you’d think this would be easier the second time. Hehehe….

Yang:*grabs her hand* Jaune’s on his way. All of them are by the sound of it.

Ruby:That’s good...wouldn’t mind some more happy faces in here.

Nora:Then let's make them really happy by making them to the party. How about they see you with a beautiful baby in your arms? Ready?

Ruby:*tightens grip* To get back to a life of combat skirts? You bet.

Nora:*smiles* One...Two...THREE!

xxxx

‘Almost there. I can’t believe this is actually happening.’ Jaune thought as he sprinted through the forest. Jumping over tree roots and gaining speed along the way. The man didn’t miss a step.

The sounds of his boots going across the floor began to get drowned out by other footsteps. With each passing moment a friend came into his peripheral that joined him in the journey back to Ruby. Weiss was the first, followed by Blake, and then Tai.

Blake:You nervous?

Jaune:Hell yeah, but it’ll all work out. I have you guys. I don’t know how far I would’ve made it otherwise.

Weiss:Think nothing of it. This has always been a group effort.

Jaune:Not Just with this. I mean everything. School, adventures, regular life problems, you’ve helped so much in so many ways. I couldn’t ask for better friends and family.

Tai:That goes both ways you know? We’re thankful for you just as much as you are for us.

Weiss:We love you, you dunce. I can’t imagine anything we wouldn’t do for you or Ruby honestly.

Blake:And we know it’s mutual. Now and forever, we’ll watch each other’s backs.

Jaune:Thanks guys. *smiles*

Tai:Hey, where’s Qrow and Raven?

On que a bird flies right past them and gains some distance. “That’s totally cheating” Weiss pouts as she can feel the heels of her shoes getting a bit worn. The bird flies around a tree and transforms back into Raven. “Need some help you slow pokes?” She grabs her sword and opens a portal. The group smiles and happily jumps through it. They come out the other side in front of the orphanage with Qrow leaning against the door waiting.

Qrow:Good thing I looked so you all could just leap. What if I was inside the house when Raven made that portal?

Tai:Sounds about on brand really. The kids would’ve had a good laugh.

Jaune:Never mind all that. Is Ru-

“Waaaaahhh!”

A cry from inside was heard loud and strong. Jaune’s eyes widened. It could’ve any kid. From the small kids to Kovu, but somehow, he knew it wasn’t. The cry, it belonged to someone new.

Jaune said nothing and walked towards the door. Everyone fell in line behind him with cheerful smiles on their face. They gave him space. It was his moment more than theirs after all. Ren stood with a child in his arms when he noticed them coming in. He gave his best friend and leader a smile then pointed upstairs. Jaune nodded then went right towards them; the crying getting louder as he got closer until it reached its peak with him right outside a wooden door. His heart felt like it was about to fly out of his chest. Jaune grabbed the door knob but felt too anxious to turn it. A fire in his chest that didn’t frighten him, but made this moment surreal. Then, a voice cut through it all.

“Don’t worry, I got you. Nothing will ever harm you…”

Without anymore thinking, he walked in. From that moment on, the winter night felt incredibly warm. There she was. His closest friend. His wife. Holding their newborn child in her arms with such grace and gentleness that it took his breath away. Despite what Ruby would probably think, Jaune doesn’t think he’s ever seen her look this angelic. She hasn’t even noticed him yet. Her attention focused on soothing the baby with the same song she used all pregnancy; the same song for Dustin.

“I’m close by, I’ll stay here. Through all things I will be nea- Hmm?” Ruby finally felt the presence of multiple eyes and looked up. It was a pleasant surprise to see so many loved ones staring in awe from the door while. Then there was Jaune. Speechless in front of her bed with tears in his eyes. Ruby had already been crying for several minutes and smiled back at him. Though she hadn’t realized just how happy he was; why they were all thrilled. It wasn’t just the baby. It was Ruby herself. Jaune was looking at deep pools of silver that shined like the moon’s reflection on a still lake. For the first time in a long time, Ruby finally looked like herself again.

Jaune:H...Hey…

Ruby:Hey there stranger. Looks like you were right this time around. Come say hello to your daughter Carmine.

Jaune’s smile grew even bigger. He’d forgotten all about that silly wager from long ago. Slowly he walked to Ruby’s side and she held the little one up so he could see the new addition to their lives. What he saw was beautiful. Carmine had come out with already a full head of blonde hair that grew darker and red at the tips. Her cheeks were all rosy; he’d assume from crying but he hoped that maybe she had a natural blush.

Regardless, what really captured him was when she opened her eyes. Purity couldn’t describe them. They were eyes that stole his heart in an instant. Maybe it was because he was already so emotional. Or maybe, it was because it was because they were just as captivating as Ruby’s. An intense silver that showed him anything possible.

Jaune:Hey Carmine Arc Rose. Welcome, to the best family ever.

Part 13

[jcmorrigan]

Valentine’s Day F/O Letter

For the event hosted by @nougatships​ and @megane-shipping​! I decided to write a letter to Giovanni Potage from EE because I am love him SO MUCH right now. Anyway, it got kinda long, so most of it will be under a cut.

***

Hi Gio,

             This is the first time I’ve ever really written anything of length to you. To any of the ones I love this way, really. Beginnings are hard. There’s so much I want to say, and I’m not sure where to even start. So let’s get the basics out of the way: how are you doing? Successful heists lately? Epic tales of villainy I simply must know about?

           I’ve been fine. Life’s boring, as usual. I would say I don’t even know how you put up with it, but I’ve seen your couch-potato side, so that’s not really a big mystery. I like that. I like that you’re equally up for breaking the mold with some adventure and just…kicking it. (Wow. That’s some old slang. When’s the last time anyone said “kicking it”? Me. Just now.)

           So as for the reason I’m writing this letter…I think it’s best if I just begin in chronological order. So you and I both know you’re not the only one in my heart, and I’m glad you respect this. There’s a time, a place, and an AU for you, and it doesn’t make you any less special. But I’m always stunned when I look back at how we met. The others, it took time to realize I loved them, and how much they meant to me. But you? You broke through that fuckin’ museum wall, and I KNEW you were my type. If you want the receipts, I have the Discord chat of when I was talking to my friend while watching you and screaming about how much I wanted to cuddle you. (LISTEN. I KNOW THAT WAS FORWARD. I’M SORRY FOR BEING A CREEP. SOMETIMES I’M A STALKER.) …Actually, the exact words were when my friend, knowing you were my type, said “If he were any further up your alley, he’d be at your house” and I said “He could come to my house anytime” and I’m sorry your girlfriend is such a creep.

           I haven’t felt that instant…fall that many times in my life. The last time I can remember it, it was for someone real. As in who originates in my world. I think you’ve figured out that sometimes, I compare you to him. That chase went on such a runaround…with men, my whole life after him, I’ve thought of them as goals to achieve. I got the attention of the hot one! Yay! Finally! Now he can love me and all of my little quirks, even though I’m super boring! And I’m not saying that’s incredibly wrong. I’ve made some good relationships that way, actually. (All fictional, of course.)

           But you…what struck me is how much I wanted to be with you for your sake. Not mine. Not to bandy about getting you to notice me, or playing the tsundere game, or worrying I’m not good enough. Sure, I like a slowburn and a good confession, but I really just wanted to be close to you because you made me smile. You had a good sense of humor, you have that unbreakable lighthearted confidence I adore…you’re a little bit of an idiot, but in the absolute best way possible (and you have emotional smarts where I don’t). And on that note! You’re one of the nicest guys I know! Even if you are the bad guy.

           Which was kind of the two-hit combo that slayed me. I have a villain problem. You know this. I know this. I wasn’t sure how to handle it. Some days, I want to be a villain, myself, and have the freedom to do what I want, take revenge on those I feel wronged me, take whatever my heart desires, just not have to live by the RULES anymore. But some days, I become acutely aware of my conscience. Could I ever be a real villain? Could I actually steal? Could I KILL? I think about the people I’d hurt, and I don’t wanna do that. I now know that depending on the situation, I can laugh with the sinners and cry with the saints. (Little Billy Joel for ya.) But with you, I know I don’t really have to…pick. You let me be me, and you let me have that freedom of just…doing bad things that are against the rules. And it feels AWESOME. But then, we never really take it too far, and we still have our friendships, our standards, our moral codes, our etiquette. Basically, you’ll let me be the good guy, too, and you’re just a sweetie pie. Some days, I need to toe the line more; some days, I need to shed blood. But you let me suspend in between, getting the best of both worlds.

           And all this is why I think…maybe you’re my favorite out of all of them. It makes me feel guilty to love you best when I’ve given my heart to two others, and who knows where it will stop? But it’s you I find myself thinking of most often. You who I’d have fun with. You who’d make me smile. You who I’d want to make smile.

           Also, I realized lately. I don’t get jealous over you, not like I thought I would. I like seeing you depicted with other partners, the Blasters or other selfshippers/OCs. I love when I meet someone else who had the good enough taste to fall for you! If you want to invite Crusher or Spike or anyone else you like to be part of this…I know you have enough love for all of us. We can all be happy together. Just say the word!

           Knowing you would support me emotionally no matter what is touching. I’ve relied on you for a lot. I’ve done scary grown-up government stuff while listening to your theme. I invited you to the crew that would go on that flight with me because I hate airplanes so much, and I knew you would give me amazing distraction-cuddles (though I suspect you, also, fear the airplane, and if I’m right about that, I admire you so much for not letting it show). There are times I…really hate myself, or feel worthless. Especially because I have so much trouble validating myself. But I know you’d just put a hand on my shoulder and tell me it’s going to be all right before inviting me to slip on some ski masks and pretty supervillain clothes so we can go hijack sugar cookies from the bakery. (Pink for you. You always have dibs on the pink ones! I haven’t forgotten! And blue for me <3)

           The adventures we’ve been on in my imagination…the walks around Twilight Town (YEAH YEAH I KNOW WRONG WORK OF FICTION), snuggling up in your knitted blankets (which are SO SOFT), making my villainess dress together, the first kiss on the rooftop, dancing like idiots, THE HEISTS…it all makes me really happy. You remind me that I don’t necessarily have to “grow up” to be a grown-up. And, I mean, I knew that, but you make sure I REALLY know that. (Speaking of which, don’t you love how if you add the two of us parents’-basement-dwellers together, you probably end up with one [1] functioning adult?)

           I also really have to thank you for being accepting of my asexuality. I’m always scared it will push others away. They say men only want one thing, right? And I am unfortunately attracted to men. Yaaaaay me. But there are big exceptions to the rule, and you’ve always been the one to say “Fuck gender roles!” I feel like when I’m with you, I never have to worry that you’ll be wanting something I can’t give you.

           In return, I will accept you no matter your body, your identity. I’ve run into a couple different takes on you, but they’re all you.

           I guess that brings me to the hard part of this. This is going public, so I don’t know how specific I want to get. But there was a very powerful force that suggested I couldn’t see you through my own eyes. That no one could do so. It almost tore us apart. I thought it was my moral obligation to let you go. I thought loving you would mean taking a stand on the wrong side and hurting my friends. I thought that what would happen is that every time I thought of you, I would be reminded of ugly truths and harsh realities.

           But after two days, I missed you so much. It was a good wake-up call to know this relationship wasn’t completely baggage-free, and it reminded me that I have many characters in my life who I want to give my attention, but it also proved to me that if I tried to let you go…I would have to physically push you away instead, and in the end, I couldn’t do it. I think back all the time to how good of a brother-dad-mentor-figure you were to Molly, and how you got worried about Fred’s astigmatism, and how I was sure you’d get along with so many of the characters who already made up my world, and how this spoke to your heart. Oh, and also, I needed your dumb ass to say loitering in front of a truck was a valid crime. (Please don’t ever loiter in front of a truck. I’m begging you.) I need you to show me how easily you shift from Grandma Mode to Knife Mode with your knitting needle, to be proud of the way you season your soup attacks, to keep making your own capes, to insist on the benefits of wielding a bat with a fucking knife taped to it, to jet your friends to safety when they’re afraid of such things as fire and traitor bears.

           Whatever comes of all that, I hope there can still be a space for us. You and me. And I’m confident it will happen, now. It already is happening. Because I know that you’d just want me to be happy, no matter where you fell on the issue that began it. And you love and respect my friends, too. I know you see us as our own little group of villains and co-minions and talk about us like we’re an evil team that has to take care of each other, and that’s…honestly so cute. Too bad I’m terrible at putting your words to work. Maybe one day. When I learn how to find the approval I seek without fighting it out of people. But I think that was the moment it went from a crush to actually loving you. When I saw how you would do that with Molly. With everyone. Make sure they knew how valid they were. I…feel bad that I haven’t been able to live up to this lately. Like I’ve failed you. But I can always try again, right? That’s what you’d want me to do! And I do improve on things every day. One day, the minion will surpass her villain (but still stay around with you because that’s what we do)! I hope I can support you in the same way – that when you have things that trouble your mind, that I can help you feel better and get you toward a solution to the problem.

           I know I’m safe with you, and I want to keep you safe, too. I know how much you’d put on the line to defend me, and I just want to protect you from all of the bad in your world – from snooty Vice Principals who call their armies to beat you up (I’m still SO SORRY you went through that!), from the law chasing you away from all that’s familiar, from all the insults and mockery that could ever come your way. I want to stand before you like a shield. To gather the troops of the other characters I know and form a protection squad around you. To make you smile. (Even if you are really, really cute when you cry. Look, I’m not gonna beat around the bush – I do love getting to comfort you. It SUCKS that you have to go through the hard times, but I like…being there. I hope that doesn’t make a sadist of me. Yeah, yeah, I know, that’s an overreaction.)

           By the way, I’m kinda sorry for not ordering the lobster bisque at the pub in the airport. I was gonna because of you! But I chickened out! And that salmon I got instead was REALLY good, okay? But it’s a double whammy because I had JUST found out the soup place in the mall closed and I need to make up for this. There will be soup!

           (As of the most recent draft, I had a horrid stomachache last Sunday, and chicken soup was all I could eat for most of the day. I thought of you. Though yours would’ve been better than Campbell’s and we both know it.)

           Fun fact: you are dating a silly, sappy lady. I keep thinking back to this letter – I drafted it once, then went back and added things, and here I am saying I ALMOST mailed this without talking up your looks. Which is probably a good thing because it means I’m primarily with you for your personality, but everyone deserves to feel like they look nice, so here goes: I love your silly, sly smirk. I love your cute little fangies. I love your untamed pink hair. I love when I can see just how deep-pink your eyes are. I love how much of a beanpole you are, and how much taller you are than me (even if it does mean you can’t carry me bridal-style for more than thirty seconds). I love how innocent you can look, and how you can look the absolute OPPOSITE of innocent when you want to. I love the way your face lights up when you’re happy about something, or when you’re being cocky. I love the way you wear your emotions on your sleeve, and I can always see how you feel just by looking (I’m bad at body language and reading between lines, after all). Do not ever doubt that is one handsome man looking back at you from the other side of the mirror! Because I could just watch your smile for so long, unbroken, you don’t even know.

           Thank you for being you. Thank you for letting me be me. Thank you for the fact that we’re our silly selves and we can be grown-ups without growing up in the gray space between good and evil. I can’t wait to see you more – in your own story, where I’m not; in the story just for us, in our own little timeline; in the TBTCverse Twilight Town where we are hounded by complex crossover lore; in the beautiful art everyone draws of you; in any other universe that may bring us together.

           And someday, the time might come that we have to part ways romantically. I’m not looking forward to that. I’m really not. I hope it doesn’t happen. But someday, we might not have the chemistry anymore, or you might find someone better, or I might have to put more focus in what I guess is the “real world.” If that day comes, I hope we can still be friends and mean something to each other. Zucchinis/QPPs, preferably. But if we have to be more distant…just so that I can think of you, and you can think of me, and we’ll both treasure those memories.

           I love you, Giovanni. Or should I say “Boss”?

 Sincerely, with all my heart,

Rachel “Composer” Scribere/Inlustris

(P.S. I wasn’t sure which universe’s last name I should put, seeing as I obviously am not going to write my last name in THIS world, so there, have both the ones you know me as.)

(P.P.S. “If there’s a place that I could be, then I’d be another memory. Can I be the only hope for you? Because you’re the only hope for me.” ~MCR, “The Only Hope for Me Is You,” Danger Days: The True Lives of the Fabulous Killjoys)

[messinwitheddie]

"It's nice to meet you all, but it's been a long shift and Zim doesn't feel much like Zim. Go have fun with your friends, Gir."

"Are you ok, Master?"

"You don't need to call me that, anymore; we've been over this so many times, Gir!"

"Oh yeah... Are you ok, Zim?"

"I'm fine."

"You don't look fine. Are you sure you don't want to come with us? I won't get a free shift until after the new snacking system opens."

"I'm gonna sit this one out."

"Will you be there to see me on opening day?"

"I'm working that night, so, yes."

"Yaaaaay! Ok, see you then!" -hugs- "I miss you, Zim."

".........I miss you too, Gir."

Future AU, rougly 20-year-later, after the events of the series/ EtF scenario.

Zim is reduced to a food service drone again after a series of events that forced him to give up invading.

Gir's AI programming was put into a young Irkin's body. Gir becomes a frylord's apprentice and is real popular among the young elite in training that he serves. He starts living his own life and unintentionally drifts apart from Zim...

In an effort to spend time with him, Gir invites Zim to eat/play out with his friends during their downtime. Gir introduces Zim to a cult following of young, short soldiers-in-training who look up to him as their rebel hero. They eagerly want hang out with Zim and pick his brain....

And in the past Zim would have reveled in such flattery, but now, seeing such bright, hopeful eyes look up at him fills him with doubt.

(Blame Enter the Florpis for all this sad fan drabble. Added to it)

[puppyluver256]

OKAY SO NOW I HAVE SOME DESIGN CONCEPTS FOR MY SFMxSPLATOON AU HERE YOU GO and now I’m gonna try to run down what this is all about outside of the braindump post that I kept adding onto.

Splat For Me - A Summary

The basic gist is that Habit owns a flower shop in Inkopolis and Kamal is his partner of both the business and romance types. Habit’s a shark, specifically a porbeagle (I’m gonna refer to him as a “Sharkling” due to working on similar logic to Inklings and Octolings), and Kamal’s an octo. The flower shop would have an in-game function kinda like a combination of the Crust Bucket (in that they have floral accessories that players could add to their hat/clothing for exp boosts, cash boosts, and temporary ability add-ons) and Salmon Run (in that you’d get another play mode where you fight weird enemies, more details below).

Sharkling Habit

I had a hard time makin him not look like Garbage so my efforts should be appreciated at some level. I know the only precedent for sharks in the Splatoon universe is Fuka Bottom of the Bottom Feeders (one of the in-universe music groups that AREN’T Squid Sisters or Off the Hook, look ‘em up), but they’ve got that “I’ve turned this shark vertically and am now looking at their mouth and underbelly” look to ‘em that I most definitely did not want, but I managed to make something more in my vision yaaaaay

Habit managed to get away from his nasty abusive parents before becoming a dentist in this AU (besides, being a dentist isn’t THAT lucrative when the dominant species doesn’t even have bones let alone proper teeth), so he’s not Dr. Habit here, he’s just Boris the flower shark. He’s gotten a lot of attention for his little flower shop, partly because the kids participating in turf war are getting some really good use out of the shop’s floral accessories and partly because they like coming around just to see Habit. S’not every day that you get to hang around vertebrates in this society, and they think his teeth are cool. Yup, that’s why I made him a shark, to make the too-many-teeth face not so unnatural. And being a shark, sometimes those extra teeth push themselves forward and knock out the old ones, which if still in decent condition never go to waste. The really nice-looking ones get turned into authentic shark tooth necklaces (after they’ve gone through a good wash, of course, don’t wanna give the customers his mouth germs), the others that don’t have any significant wear and tear get either ground into bone meal for his flowers or occasionally just shoved whole into the soil, with the erythronium responding to these treatments the best.

While there is some flower growth going on in the shop itself, most of the work there is keeping them healthy for sale and the major growth time for the flowers are off-site in various greenhouses that he refers to as Habitats. (before he had these set up, he was caught several times trying to grow flowers in the Kelp Dome and subsequently removed, took five times for him to realize that maybe he shouldn’t be doing that and also maybe don’t try to swipe a nearly-ripe artichoke on your way out gdi) They’re a bit more than just a normal greenhouse, actually; they’re self-contained areas that seem to be made with materials and techniques that are incredibly similar to Octarian technology. How’d he get ahold of that stuff? No one knows, not even Kamal, and he’s the most likely source of such tech who’d be close to him. One thing that is for certain is that he’s procured something that lets non-inking beings use ink-based weapons, and it’s been incredibly helpful given certain recent developments...

Turns out that his Habitats are starting to come under fire from some very tricky troublemakers. Weird little crafts somehow breaking in from the skies, piloted by...snails? Are they really snails? They certainly don’t look like the Super Sea Snails that everyone’s used to, they look more like the typical image of a UFO piloted by snail-like creatures (snailiens?), but they’re here and they’re hungry and they’ve got a taste for flowers. And Habit’s friggin’ pissed. That’s where the player would come in if this were a real game element: once you’d get to a certain freshness level, you’d make your way to the flower shop only to see Kamal manning the counter instead of Habit, and he’d suggest you go help Habit deal with his pest problem because you “look like you’re pretty capable with slingin’ ink”. After a tutorial where you learn how to deal with the big boy snailiens, you could join up with some other players and take ‘em on. You would, of course, be rewarded handsomely for your help.

Funny little image I also had in mind: he’s been known to get stuck in shark form at inopportune moments, and when this happens he’ll need someone to crack his back to make it easier to shift back into humanoid form. No one knows how to handle this unless they’ve done it at least once because no one else around him has booooones XD (also his humanoid form is prolly gonna still have green skin despite no part of the porbeagle being green because I don’t currently feel comfortable assigning natural skintones to any of the SFM characters who are canonically green/blue/purple/etc, unless their canon design makes it Very Obvious what natural skintone would be most likely, ie. Tiff)

Octoling Kamal

Kamal was significantly easier to work with due to my experience with drawing Octolings already hahaha

Kamal’s the assistant manager at Habit’s flower shop, which is basically a fancy way of saying he’s the only other person there who could legally be a full-time employee. He handles most of the logistics of keeping the shop stable, because as much passion the boss has for their work, passion alone can’t pay the bills and he’s often a tad too distracted to deal with the numbers and paperwork. They work pretty well together, even if they do both have a tendency to goof off on the job.

I seriously doubt that Marina and the various incarnations of Agent 8 were the only Octolings to migrate topside after the events of the first game, so Kamal was probably one of several who found a way out. I haven’t hammered this part out yet entirely, but I’m pretty sure that he would’ve been on staff for a weapons/tech r-n-d group before leaving at his first opportunity and grabbing some random gadget in the process. He hated the place he ended up emerging in because it was near a small town where everyone was so spread out and him being used to (not necessarily comfortable with, just used to) constant sounds at all hours made the silence of just the first night unbearable. So he tried to hop a train to any urban area that he came across but in his haste to get topside he forgot to bring any moneeeyyy, not even Octarian money just no money at all, left it all behind like a goof. He ends up freaking out to himself because even though he’s got a valuable Thing on him it’s not like the train people are gonna recognize it as anything but junk or even be able/willing to accept it as replacement for standard currency, then out of nowhere this huge-ass shark man just shows up and buys a ticket to Inkopolis for him? Okay, sure, he’ll take what he can get, even if the guy was all “u owe me a ‘favor’ ;-)” once they were on their way. And of course that’s how he met his future boss and bf. ;P

At some point Kamal gets a little jealous of all the kids having fun with the turf war stuff and kinda wishes he could try it out at least once, but of course that’s kid stuff and he’s got Adult Responsibilities to worry about... Oh wait, there’s actually an adults’ league? And Habit’s insisting on giving him time off to go try it and see how it is? 

(also those flower seed bags say “bloomy” in one of the Inkling alphabets, and yes it WAS a “woomy” joke on my part)

Other details (to be expanded upon)

Putunia and Flower Kid are often seen at the flower shop, even though I don’t have any designs for them yet). Putunia is there so often because she’s Habit and Kamal’s adopted kid, and while she REALLY wants to get into turf war she’s far too young. (if you’ve ever seen the Inkling growth chart, she’s at stage 3 of growth) Flower Kid’s there because they are a part-time employee, often delivering products around town, but they spend enough time with their employers and Putunia that they might as well be their honorary child as well. They’re old enough to participate in turf war, they’re just not interested in doing so.

[ghostmartyr]

Pokémon SoulSilver Randomized Nuzlocke [Part 1]

Since I haven’t fully learned from my mistakes, hey! It’s time for another Nuzlocke. With extra Randomizer action for reasons that are going to be very apparent as I go through this set’s rules.

I’m going to try what this person on the internet calls a Chainlocke, though with slight alterations for the sake of sanity; basic idea is that my catch Types have to be linked. If I catch a Grass/Poison pokemon, my next option has to have one of those in common.

That gets thorny really fast, which I guess is the point, but I’m more about wacky fun than serious challenges. So to make things more entertaining, I will be randomizing every pokemon in the wild, as well as NPC gifts and trades. All the other Trainers keep their original stuff. I get to be special.

So. Rules:

Only the first viable pokemon of each route may be caught.

Gift pokemon are cool to use.

In-game trades are also cool.

‘Viable’ in this case means that they must have a Type in common with the most recent caught pokemon.

The starter will be starting that chain despite not technically being caught by me. Because I feel like it.

Each pokemon must receive a nickname.

If a pokemon faints, it is considered dead. It will go in an appropriately named box in the PC.

In the event of a team wipe, the run will continue with whatever’s left (alive) in the PC.

And that’s about it. Let’s kick it.

No.

I can’t remember if this version does the all-caps for names or not. In any case, this protagonist avatar will take on the name Sunny. Because I am in a warm and welcoming mood, ready to make all the new creatures I encounter my friends.

I love how they have Lyra use the mail system.

Someone has to.

It certainly won’t be anyone playing these games.

Okay, based on how Lyra’s Marill is discussed, human names don’t get the all-caps treatment, but pokemon do. What does this mean for my nicknaming schemes? No idea. The hour is late and I don’t care enough.

-rubs hands together-

Hmmmm.

...

Dude.

Get out.

Hmmmm.

I can’t pick Cyndaquil, because what even is the point if I do that. Sableye I’ve never been so interested in as a true companion. Dewgong is fully evolved, and I hate starting out with that.

However.

I never get to use Dewgong.

Seel is never anywhere convenient.

DEWGONG WELCOME TO THE TEAM!

Shaped like a friend.

I haven’t worked out any particular theme for this run. I can name her whatever I want. I think I shall call her Chance.

Look at how cute she is. She is adorable. Sassy and highly persistent. I declare her perfect. She also knows Headbutt! That matters beyond being a cool move in this version! Much squeeing! She also knows Growl, Signal Beam, and Icy Wind.

My next pokemon will have to be Water or Ice. It will probably be Water, thanks to Water being absurdly common. That’s cool. I like Water pokemon.

And so, without yet being able to catch anything, I head out into the world. Running my obligatory fetch quest for Professor Elm.

Huh, a Smoochum says hello. That’s a good thing to know for later. But what’s in the Headbutt tree?

...A Hoothoot. Sigh. Well, one less thing to worry about when finding pokemon.

Weedle also lurks in the grass.

Yay. Gotta go fast.

Can I buy poke balls yet?

No. Sad face.

The next route has Kricketot. Did I check the similar strength button by accident?

Then suddenly, Grumpig! Okay, sweet. Just a few Buggy coincidences. Gligar is also here.

Literally have never heard of you. You have a boring name. No one should ever copy it ceaselessly for a gag that no one sees any value in.

Hello, a wild challenger approaches! With his super duper Totodile! Headbutt it, Chance. Headbutt it into submission. Good girl.

Uh. There’s not enough room for it.

Perfect.

I love how Silver’s most defining feature is his red hair.

After a short visit home to tell our mom we are far too irresponsible to be trusted with all of the money we’re going to earn from mugging other children, plus a short tutorial on catching things, we can finally get started!

Smoochum is the only thing available in the routes we’ve visited so far, but I haven’t checked out the northern one right outside the starting town yet.

But the walking takes the decision out of my hands! We encounter a level 4 Smoochum, and as per the rules, that is what I have to go for. Lest I kill the route.

...

I killed the Smoochum.

I guess that answers my question about its Typing. Ruh roh. Signal Beam was a mistake. For multiple reasons, now that I’m taking a second to think about it. Whoops. Any game that requires me to think is screwed from the start, honestly.

So now we search for something else to catch.

Route 46? Be nice?

Carvanha! That’s a Water! Can catch!

In theory. It’s broken out of two pokeballs. It’s also level 2, so I don’t think I can risk attacking it.

.I’m going to run out of balls, aren’t I?

I think I have to risk an Icy Wind. I’m on my last poke ball. I don’t really want to leave it purely up to the mood of the RNG.

Chance apparently doesn’t want friends.

She got a critical hit.

Two dead routes! Okay!

Still needing a Water or Ice Type!

Also more Poke Balls!

One of those problems I can fix. As for the other, inb4 the Mystery Egg and whatever I get from Bill are the only other teammates Chance ever has.

We march through the trainers between us and the next town. Certain of nothing but Chance’s ability to murder them all.

Route 31 has an Elekid as the first thing I see and the rules say I can’t catch it. What horrible person came up with this. Seviper and Lopunny are also here. Those I care less about.

Dark Cave? Help? Mayhaps?

A Golbat appears.

Okay.

Before we think too hard on that, I’ve gotta say that I do love how gen 4 does the caves. They are very gorgeously cavernous, and the few times I bother to think about the background art, I enjoy walking through them.

But yeah, is there anything in this cave that is not a Golbat?

Route 31 has a Butterfree.

These are things that do not help me.

The person who usually gives you an Onix for a Bellsprout in whatever this city is (Violet) offers a Corphish for a Kecleon. Things to keep in mind if I ever find a Kecleon. That I can catch.

In no version of this game have I ever done this egg thing. I was unaware there even was an egg thing, since anything that requires me to pick the right word out of the hat of words bores me to tears. Then I started watching too many people play Pokemon games on the internet.

-Googles how to get egg-

So normally, you can get a Mareep, Wooper, or Slugma. In the spirit of the Chainlocke, even though I said gifts were cool, we’ll take the Wooper egg. Vote now on whether or not it’ll actually be a Wooper. I don’t know how to use the Randomizer.

Hm. Iiiiiiinteresting.

Chance, Headbutt some trees on the off chance that a Water pokemon falls out, please.

It’s a Hoothoot.

I get the feeling that the Randomizer settings didn’t care about the pokemon found through Headbutting.

Route 32. Help.

Gligar. That is not help.

Rhydon is not help either. Likewise Torchic.

SQUIRTLE. THAT IS HELP.

...

...

...

Chance.

Why are you getting so many critical hits against your friends. Do you not want friends. Have I raised you to be so antisocial.

-sigh- Route 32 declared dead.

Ruins of Alph? Maybe you have someone Chance likes?

...

Why is Gligar everywhere.

I guess. I will go to the tower. With Chance. Just the two of us.

Plus the Gloom egg, which is looking like a very likely candidate for the only friend Chance will ever have. Besides the Mystery Egg we don’t have yet.

(Also Rock Smash HM get. Yaaaaay.)

Local level 11 Dewgong beats up 3 year-olds.

So many dead Bellsprout.

I haven’t run into any wild pokemon here, yet. Sadness. We will never know which new friend Chance was going to kill next.

SURPRISE!

It’s Medicham.

Chance kills it.

Partially because I can’t catch it anyway, partially because that is just what Chance does. Her sassiness belies her murderous intent.

Flash obtained with little fuss, and time to move on to Falkner. He of the coolest name. Yet another Gym Leader I wanted to be as a child. Even if he uses nothing but birds. Falkner is just the coolest name.

Oh, and it looks like there’s also Roselia in this tower.

I can’t do anything about it, but that’s nice.

I love how each generation of pokemon decides the Gyms need to be more extra.

They’re right and they should say it.

-five seconds later- Well that went by quickly. Good girl, Chance. Your murder spree continues. And our prize? Picking up the Mystery Egg! Which gets to be a genuine mystery for now! Chance! You might have a friend! In pure spite of your best efforts!

Time to spend an hour doing nothing but walking. I normally wouldn’t be so interested in hatching the eggs, but. I would kind of like to have a promise of Chance not being completely alone this entire game.

One down! His name is Cloud! He is... also Sassy (Chance, is this why you let him stay), level 1, and alert to sounds!

!

whatisitwhatisitwhatisitwhatisit

...Wow. Something I actually could have gotten legitimately in this Chainlocke. In theory. In a world where Chance is of slightly different temperament.

Her name shall be Sleet. She is Quiet and likes to run.

Hm.

I remain unsure if I’m going to actually use either of these new friends. The spirit of what I’m going for with this doesn’t really work with me just being handed two random Official Teammates. I might change my mind after a few more routes of things not going well for me, but for now, I think I’ll mostly stick to me and Chance.

..Though before I do..

They’re both level 1. I can be nice and not set them up for death. They can make it to level 5 before we say a cordial farewell. I can grind in this game. I can be nice.

-ten minutes later-

-tfw Ivysaur also lives on Route 32 because Route 32 is starter central-

Niceness done, let’s get on the road.

The road takes us, and our level 17 Dewgong, to Union Cave.

If you squint, this looks like fanart of a sleeping Sandslash.

Will we find the Water or Ice pokemon our team longs for here????

You have got to be fucking kidding me.

Uh.

Let me look up the rules for evolving Feebas in this gen. Because Feebas is pure Water. If I can’t evolve it, I’m better off killing it so I have more options available with what I can catch.

...

The internet says I need eight massages from Daisy (Blue’s sister. in Pallet Town.) to max its Beauty so it can evolve.

Chance. just. just do the thing. we all know how this ends.

So dies Union Cave.

Awww, how cute. A Shaymin. Now just one of the many corpses littered at Sunny’s feet. Hariyama is also here. A floor below, it’s the return of Grumpig. Plus Yanmega for the first time. Girafarig.

-SIGH-

Route 33. Do you want to save us?

Weezing.

WHISCASH. GIMME. CHANCE, SWAP OUT AND LET CLOUD HELP.

AT LONG LAST.

WE HAVE.

THE CHAINLOCKE’S FIRST CATCH.

FLUDD, WELCOME TO THE TEAM!

NEXT CATCH?

WATER OR GROUND!

LET’S END IT THERE WHILE THINGS ARE STILL GOOD.

[quell-tea-salon]

Nakamura Shugo talk event at Ginansai

Osaka City University invited Nakamura Shugo (VA of Kuga Issei) for an hour-long talk show at their school festival, naturally drawing a decent group of his fans. I arrived at the campus with some time to spare as I wanted to check out the students’ exhibits and stalls as well (first time at a gakusai!), but an hour before the show started the seating area was already half full, so I went to secure a seat for myself. It was still pretty decent spot, about 10-12m away from the stage, so I could see everything clearly.

About 20 minutes before the show, the MC’s asked the audience to volunteer questions for Shugon by filling in a form and placing it in a blind box for Shugon to draw from later. I didn’t submit anything as I was too lazy to leave my seat ^q^ Then, about 5 minutes before the show, Drive A Live played over the speakers and there was a buzz among the audience. Everyone chanted “315!!” at the part before the chorus wwwwww As expected, there were a lot of Idolm@ster side M fans in the crowd. And quite a number of guys too! You can tell from the turnout at his events that Shugon is quite popular with the dudes as well due to his huge, sunny personality :)

The show started and the MC’s invited Shugon on stage while we cheered and clapped. Shugon was 50000000 watts right from the get go ;w; He thanked us all for coming and waved at us with the BIGGEST grin, so cute T_T He was also holding something that looked like a statue of a cat in his palm, and explained that one of the students on the organising team called “Ume-chan” (audience: “Ume-chan?! Umehara?!!!) had made a shisa just for him, and he loved it so much that he couldn’t put it down www

MC: Who's from Osaka? Audience: *two-thirds put their hand up* MC: Oh wow, a lot of people not from here... Anyone from overseas? Me: ..... *raises hand* MC: !!! Where are you visiting from? Me: Australia. Audience: ?!!!!!!! Shugon: Take me back with you!!!! (>∀<) Me: jgflkglsdg;kfd

And then my mind went blank for a minute as I tried to process what had just happened.... But, moving on. Shugon said that it was his first time in a school festival and that he was super tempted to check out the event, as even from the briefing room he could hear how lively everything was.

Shugon: I asked my manager if I could go outside but they were like, "NO." And I was like, "...Gomen (´・ω・｀)" Audience: Cute.......

The hosts were both from the keion club, so Shugon, being a music nerd, had a lot of fun talking to them. I only remember this part vaguely (my mind was still reeling from Shugon asking me to take him home LOL) but I think they were discussing how Shugon got into music. For anyone not in the know, before becoming a seiyuu Shugon was part of an indie band called Akasaka Folk Village. He said that when he was younger (school-aged, I think?) he listened to regular pop music like everyone else, and it wasn't until he graduated from high school that he started to learn about a wider range of music genres.

When asked about his impression of Osaka, Shugon said that he's been here so many times (for work) that he considers it his third hometown, after Okinawa and Tokyo. He loves that everyone is so warm and friendly, and that all the food here is delicious, especially konamono (someone in the audience held up a Kaerru plush ww) like okonomiyaki and takoyaki, BBQ, and sushi.

After some time they moved on to the Q&A section. Shugon pulled out questions from the box and handed them over to the MC's to be read out.

Q: You obviously use your throat a lot in your work. How do you care for your throat? Shugon: I don't have ANY scientific backing lol, but I mix manuka honey in water and drink that every night. Honey's really good for the throat, and manuka honey is the best. It comes in different ratings, and the higher the rating the better. But the stronger ones are also really expensive! You don't need the expensive ones. Even regular manuka honey works really well.** Oh, during SQP my throat was in bad shape right before the concert, and when I told my manager they gave me a throat candy from Taiwan. After taking it my throat recovered immediately and I could sing even higher notes than usual!

Q: What kind of school life did you have? Shugon: In elementary school I was really shy and a crybaby, the type of kid that would run crying to his mother. In middle school I started to take an interest in sports, and you know how there are sports tests every year? In my third year I actually ranked second in the test!

Q: Any advice for students about to take their entrance exams? Shugon: I didn't do much studying as a student.... Whenever I'm invited to schools or unis for work, I see the students doing their best and think, ah, I should've tried harder in school! Sorry, what was the question? www MC: Advice for exams ww Shugon: Oh yeah! Good luck! Everyone, let's put our hands together to wish this person all the luck! *claps*

Q: What kind of hair style do you like to see on girls? Shugon: Mmmmm, this is a tough one... *Gestures to the person who submitted the question* What kind of hairstyle do you like on guys? Audience member: ........ Shugon: See? It's hard to answer, isn't it?www They all have their own charms... Everyone looks super cute! Audience: Kyaaa! Shugon: The guys look cute too! Audience (guys): Yaaaaay! Shugon: *1000000000watt smile* Audience: Shugon's cute too! Shugon: Thanks!!!!!!!!!

Q: If you could participate in a school festival, which club would you join as? And what date course would you plan? Shugon: Date course?? You can do dates in school festivals????? MC: Everyone does it.... the haunted house is especially popular with couples. Shugon: HAUNTED HOUSE!!! THAT'S AWESOME! 8D Student on 2nd floor balcony waving sign for haunted house: WE'RE OVER HERE!!!! Shugon: *Waves back* There they are!! Everyone go visit them!! MC: Couples get ticket discounts and-- Shugon: Wait, why do the COUPLES get discounts? Give it to the singles!ww But yeah, I love horror films so haunted houses are great... It'd be nice to go with a girl who gets really scared. I'd probably get punched, like "Shut up!!" *does punching motion and then mimes getting hit* "W, wait up!!" *mimes chasing after the girl*

He then asked the MC's how they take part in the school festival as the keion club, and they replied that they usually perform songs by Back Number. MC: But not many people listen to Back Number... Shugon: Back Number's really good! Everyone listens to their songs! Even in Australia! *gestures to me* Me: !!??????????????? *doesn't actually know Back Number but shook that he still remembers me*

Shugon encouraged the MC to try his hand at writing songs, and talked about how it’s good to create music with your own feelings and experiences to share with the world. MC: I write sometimes, but the next day I look at my work and think, "Man, this is embarrassing!" Shugon: I know!!!! I think this happens to everyone who’s tried writing. It's usually late at night when you're struck by inspiration and start writing, and at the time you think, "Oh boy, I've got something AMAZING!" but the next morning you look at it and regret everything. MC: Even the song titles can be lame... Shugon: Yeah, you're like "Why did I think this was cool?"

Q: When you're traveling to/from work, what kind of music do you listen to? Shugon: I used to do that, but not anymore. These days I set aside time just to listen to music. At night when I'm at home, I sit in front of the speakers and think "Which songs should I listen to tonight?" and just sit quietly for hours, listening. Lately I've been playing a lot of Sakanaktion (and another female artist whose name I forgot ;;).

Q: Do you like being called "Shugon"? Shugon: I LOVE IT!!!!!!! Everyone, on the count of three, say "Shugon!" Okay? One, two... Audience: SHUGOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNNN!!!!! Shugon: THIS FEELS SO GOOD!!!!!!! Thank you, Osaka!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Q: What's your type? Shugon: My type?? My type is....... *looks at the audience member and switches to bedroom voice* Omae da yo♥  (It's you ♥) Audience: *DIES* Shugon: www My type is girls who retweet my tweets! Audience: wwwwww Shugon: Also boys who retweet my tweets ;D Audience: Foo~~~

Q: Can you share any interesting backstage stories from the recording for Side M anime? Shugon: Honestly, it has the atmosphere of a boys school. The recording studios are usually quite small, but a lot of actors are involved, so it can get kinda cramped and hot even with the air-con on full blast. A lot of people bring food/snacks to share and during break time we're all stuffing our faces. Uchida Yuuma, who plays Kaoru (the audience starts to giggle already ww) will just start doing push ups in the middle of a conversation, but we're so used to it that we just keep talking ww Shugon: Ishikawa Kaito, who plays the producer, is really into training, and he showed me a new workout move *sit sideways on chair and bends body into a V shape, where only his bum is on the chair and his upper body and legs are lifted* I can't do it well right now, but this is supposed to be good for your abs >< And oh, recently I went to Disneyland with Itou Kento (VA of Hazama-sensei) and we had so much fun! I remember standing in a queue full of couples where we were the only pair of guys.... It was a very long queue www

The last segment was a rock-paper-scissors game between Shugon and the audience, and the last 3 standing would receive a signed board from Shugo. I lost very early on :( But I saw one of the winning girls break down and cry when she realised that she had won. I feel happy for her ;w; Oh, in the first round, Shugon said something like “I’m gonna use rock!!”, which he actually did wwww In the second round the same thing happened, and when a huge portion of the audience got eliminated he was like “Why won’t you guys believe me?!” wwww

Lastly, Shugon promoted the side M anime and Proani. When he mentioned Issei, a girl in the audience held up a pair of Lizz-kuns (of the twins). Shugon noticed and thanked her for bringing them, aww.

Shugon left us with a farewell message, joking about how he had so much fun that it didn’t feel like work at all, and thanked us again for coming to see him. He also asked us to go and spend lots of money on the food stalls and exhibits to help the uni raise funds since the talk show itself was free ww As he was leaving the stage Reason!! played over the speakers and the audience screamed... Shugon went "Oh!!!" and sang just a little bit "by your side~♪" and we all DIED ><

Shugon has some photos of the event on his twitter (I’m somewhere in the 2nd photo, gdi.) I still have butterflies in my stomach when I recall the event.... Shugon was just so down-to-earth and radiant, and everyone had a great time. I personally will never forget that Nakamura Shugo spoke to me directly, even for just a few tiny moments *____* I’m sure he created some amazing memories for everyone who was present.

**Let me put on my pharmacist hat for a minute... He's partly right - honey is good for throat care (among many other uses) due to its antibacterial and healing properties. While manuka honey is marketed as being superior to regular honey, the scientific evidence so far is inconclusive. Manuka honey is definitely good for you, but so is any raw honey. The next time you have a sore throat, mix a teaspoon of raw honey and some lemon juice in warm water. You'll feel better after the first sip! Sometimes I just place a teaspoon of manuka honey in my mouth and hold it there for as long as possible.

[utanotranslations]

Blog Post Translation: December 13th, 2020: 712* The First JinZIN in a Year!!!!

Enjoy, and please don’t repost without credit!

Yaa This is Satoyoshi Utano

Thank you very much for the comments and likes yesterday as well! * I read all of them *

Today!!

We did the "BEYOOOOONDS FC EVENT 2020 ~Christmas no JinZIN~"!!!!! * <3

Yaaaaay!!!!!

It's been one year, and this was the first and last JinZIN of 2020......! :O :O :O

This year, the theme was that we were fairies who are helping Santa, So to go along with that, we had a segment where we had to help with things that were quite hard!! Lolol

I could get to know about aspects of the members that I hadn't seen yet and On the other hand, I might have found out that what seems normal for me, isn't normal at all......! :O Lol

It's been a while since I danced to "Kanojo ni Naritai!!!" and "Oheso no Kuni Kara Konnichiwa", And we played a shopping game with sweet scoring...... Lolololol

I think that it would be good if everyone could feel our usual fuffly and fun feeling

It's been a while since all of us did an FC event, and the way that the this is BEYOOOOONDS! jumped out was really funny~!!!! <3 :) <3 :) <3

I'll put the setlist here too (Be aware of spoilers!!)

Setlist

1: Jingle Bells / All 2. Winter Story / MiyoHonoUu (Show 1) Samui ne. / CHICA#TETSU (Show 2) 3. Nigiyakana Fuyu / Ame no Mori Kawa Umi (Show 1) Pittari Shitai X-Mas!  MiyoHonoUu (Show 2) 4. Seinau Kane ga Hibiku Yoru / CHICA#TETSU (Show 1) Aitai Lonely Christmas / Ame no Mori Kawa Umi (Show 2) 5. Santa no Saxophone / All

That's it~!!!!

A Christmas song I've always wanted to sing!

The last part of the Winter Story chorus And the "Santa-sa~n!!!!!" part of Pittari Shitai X-Mas, I was really happy to be able to do the phrases I've always wanted to <3 <3 <3 <3 <3

Today's photo with Miimi!!

Today too, her smile is ridiculously cute <3 Fuu

And!!!!

There was also a surprise announcement!!!!!!!

It's been decided that next spring, we will be starring in our third play

I'm tooooooo happy T_T T_T T_T T_T <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3

I love doing plays, so I'm really, really excited <3 :) <3

And! The title you're interested in is......

"Nemureru Mori no BEYO"

(The photo shows the fairies who collapsed at th etitle)

It's not "biyo", it's "BEYO"!!!!!!!!!

Again, there's a sudden BEYO lolololol

I think that I want to make it a play that is BEYOOOOONDSlike, which many people can enjoy!!!

We don't know anything about it yet but, I think that later, I'll be able to talk about the details Look forward to it, okay!! <3

It's a little bit early, but it feels like I had plenty of Christmas and now we're at the end of the year lolol

I hope everyone who came also had fun......! *

BEYOOOOONDS will continue to fly in 2021 too, so I'll be happy if you look forward to it!!

Well then! I'll do my best tomorrow, too! Enjoy the Christmas show, too! Okay! <3

See ya!

[conretewings]

Chef Dad Guzma

A short, fluffy story inspired by my love of guzmeria and my lil’ Fern, having to pull together a ‘breakfast’ when my pantry was bare, and my reading ‘Breathe Out and Breathe In’ by saphruikan for the hundredth time. It’s so good you should all go read it and the entire series it’s part of. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

-Sunlight streams through the palm trees and into Fern’s window, creating a dappled pattern of stars along her floor and pouring over the row of plastic ‘crystal’ figures on her dresser, throwing rainbows across the walls. Her eyes, still heavy from sleep and the fleeting wisps of her dreams, fluttered open as she yawned loudly and rolled herself to sit on the edge of her bed. Her Venonat, curled up among her stuffed toys, perked up his antennae and hopped to the floor before waddling toward the door. Rubbing her eyes a final time, Fern stood and listened. For a moment she was confused; it was so quiet. Too quiet. Normally her parents were up and about by this time, but today there was nothing but silence on the other side of her door. The heavy curtains of sleep still upon her, it took a moment to remember that her mother was staying the night at a friend’s house.

Her stomach clenched, then rumbled, giving her a sudden, vivid reminder that it was high time for breakfast. Opening the door, Venonat happily bouncing ahead of her, she padded down the hall and turned right, seeing the door to her parents’ room was slightly ajar. Now the silence of the house was broken by her father’s slow, quiet snores as she pushed it open and tip-toed inside. She grinned; he was sprawled on his stomach across the bed, blanket half on the floor and one foot twitching in his sleep. She clapped a hand over her mouth to suppress her giggles and crept over to the bed, climbing up and wriggling closer to him. She was so close she could see his breath move the hair on his arms, a low, deep rumble coming from his chest as he slept on. Unable to resist, Fern reached out and sank her hand into the rough, black and white messy hair on his head. At this, his whole body jerked and he let out a loud, sudden yawn. Fern squealed, the giggles finally coming out as she reached out both hands now and grabbed his face.

“Daddy! Daddy wake up! Get up you lazy bum-bum!”

His eyes opened, deep storm-gray meeting bright amber-gold and he frowned as best he could with his cheeks squished between two tiny hands, “Good morning to you too, Cutiefly. And you got that from your mom, didn’t you?”

Laughing, Fern clambered to her feet and began jumping up and down on the bed, “Up! Up! Up!”

“Ohfortheluva-! Alright, alright! Or maybe....” his face split into a devious grin and before she could run, he grabbed the six-year-old and pulled her back onto himself as he flopped back down, “We should stay here a bit longer!”

Fern shrieked with laughter as he mercilessly ruffled her hair and blew raspberries on her neck, kicking her feet and twisting her body to gaze at him in adoration. 

Stopping, he sighed into her thick, black hair. Sometimes, especially days like this, days where the warm, sparkling sun shone through the sheer curtains and a tiny angel smiled up at him, he had to stop and wonder if he was still dreaming, if at any moment he would awaken to find himself in a dingy, green, creaky bed, the sun gone and the rain pounding the roof, the room smelling vaguely of mildew and alcohol, finding he was instead hugging a dirty blanket. But, miraculously, here he was. Here she was. He smiled softly, burrowing his face again in her warmth, the kind that chased his demons a little farther away each day.

Finally letting go, she flung herself off the bed and stood in the middle of the room, still jumping up and down, “C’mon Daddy! Time for breakfast!”

Groaning and muttering, Guzma pulled himself to a sitting position as he rubbed his face. Peering over his fingers at his daughter, he half-smiled with another sigh, “How do you have so much energy this early?”

A couple minutes later, the two of them were in the kitchen, Fern kicking her feet as she sat at the kitchen island, Guzma staring into the fridge and grumbling to himself. Finally he shut it and turned around, arms crossed, “Alright munchkin. Since your mom’s away for the day, how’s about some oatmeal?”

Fern made a face, “Mom made oatmeal yesterday!”

“Picky, picky,” Guzma said, rolling his eyes, “Aight Cutiefly, what do you want?”

Jutting out her lip, Fern replied, “I dunno.”

Scratching his stubble, Guzma turned back to the fridge and opened it, taking out a carton of eggs, “I dunno, huh? How about eggs and toast? Maybe a sweet malasada? Some coffee?”

“Daaaaad! I can’t have coffee!”

“Then juice! Or tea. Or cocoa. Cocoa is always good. Anyway,” he pulled a frying pan and a couple plates from the dish drainer, “Let’s get this party started.”

A radio sitting on a shelf played local bands, the sounds of drums and ukulele mixing with the sizzling of eggs in a frying pan and the singing of one large man and one very small girl as they worked side-by-side. Guzma set two forks on their plates as he went to grab the bread.

“Wait-where’s the bread?” he wondered aloud,

“It’s in the microwave!” Fern answered as she tapped the flipper in time with the song on the radio.

Guzma cocked an eyebrow, “Huh? The he-what’s it doing there?”

“Mom was cleaning the kitchen yesterday and decided to put in there ‘cause it saved room!”

With a shrug, Guzma opened the microwave-to find it empty. Grumbling, he opened the cupboards one by one, unable to locate any bread. Finally he exhaled in exasperation and grabbed a box of crackers, “Okay so...we seem to be out of bread. How’s crackers? They’re basically bread, just crispier.” 

“Yaaaaay!”

Dropping handfuls of crackers on their plates, Guzma went for where he knew there was a bag of malasadas-to find it empty as well. He bit back several curse words as he gave his daughter a strained smile, “Um, baby-girl? We’re out of malasadas too. Pop-tarts?”

Eventually, two plates of fried eggs, saltine crackers, and pop-tarts, coupled with one mug of juice and one of coffee, sat in front of their respective diners. Guzma grabbed a bottle of hot sauce from the fridge for his own food, then held it out, “Want some for your eggs?”

“Eeeewwww!” Fern shrieked, pulling her plate closer, “No way mister!”

“Tch! Suit yourself,” he mumbled, dribbling the spicy sauce over his eggs, “But you’re missing out.”

Plumeria hummed to herself as she approached the door to her home, still going over all the events from the day and night before; all the fun, jokes, and general chaos her and her friends had created over the past twelve hours or so. She brushed some stray hair behind her ears, remembering the attractive, obviously drunk young man at the bar that had tried to flirt with her-tried, until she told him who her husband was, her and her friends howling with laughter as he fell over himself running away. 

Hearing the radio playing, she smiled, knowing they were up and about and opened the sliding glass door to the kitchen, “Good morning you two.”

Fern dropped her fork, flying off her chair to fling herself at her mother, “Mommy! Mommy mommy mommy! I missed you mommy I love you did you have fun?!”

Smiling gently, Plumeria stooped to hold her daughter, “Hey sweetheart! Yes, I did, thank you,” she looked up at Guzma, “Hey handsome.”

Guzma grinned, throwing her a wink and a reverent smile, making her heart skip a beat. Standing, she scooped Fern into her arms and glanced over their plates-then froze.

“What the-?”

Shrugging, Guzma said, “We’re outta bread. Crackers are made of the basically the same stuff right?”

He met Plumeria’s cool, ‘you’re-kidding-me-right’ gaze and sputtered defensively, “Gimme a break! I fed us didn't I? At least I didn’t grab a bag of chips and dip or make crappy watery pancakes with whatever we had laying around like I used to back when we were roughing it in Te-”

Biting his lip, he cut himself off at his own realization, coupled with Plumeria’s slightly panicked, definitely furious look. She shook her head lightly, subconsciously holding Fern a little tighter. Sighing, he ran a hand through his patchy, black-and-white hair.

“Hey, I did my best with what I had. She’s not complaining, right Cutiefly?”

Fern pumped one of her little fists in the air, “Nope! You made a great breakfast Daddy!”

“See? That’s all that matters.”

Plumeria rolled her eyes with another smile, then asked, “Is there any left for me?”

[fireflyfish]

Hi, do you have any advice for this unable-to-make-decisions GoH newbie? I'm level 62 atm and just developed 7-star Luminara, and I can't decide what to invest in. (7-star Mace is almost there as well.) I want an actual squad (right now my A-team is Mace, Luminara, Tarkin, Chewie, Jedi Consular), which one do you recommend?

Hello there and Welcome to the Madness! We are super glad to have you with us on our long trek to Rancor/Tank/General Kenobi Domination! 

First of all, Congratulations on getting 7* Luminara! YAAAAAY! 

She’s fabulous and she stays fabulous for a good long while. She was my first 7* character and I still love her. She’s a character you can level up to a certain point and she stays competitive with everybody else for a good long time. Unlike some characters I am looking at you JK Anakin you pretty, squishy thing you she’s pretty good on her own and mods just make her even better. 

Since your Arena team has three Jedi I’m going to make two Suggestion Lists, one based on what you’ve already got and can easily level up and then another Suggestion List based on what’s going to be easy and successful in the long run. I’m not super skilled and well versed in what’s Meta (i.e. what’s popular and super successful in the arena right now.) because I love my Jedi and Clone Sons too much.

But I will try to keep the Meta Game in mind so that later on you haven’t managed to craft some kind of Lovecraftian Horror Zeta Ewok Scout or whatever. XD 

I’m also tagging my guild officer @silvergryphon, and my GOH sempai @gffa as well as anyone else who wants to join in the fun! @tygermama, @resistancepilots, @generallkenobi, @dendral, @teapirate, @loverofcake And anyone else who wants to help out and has Thoughts! XD

So without further ado… here’s my suggestions!

JEDI

Jedi are fun because they have lightsabers and do fun flippy things and also LIGHTSABERS ARE PLASMA CHAINSAWS! How is that not cool? 

Easy Jedi to Farm

Ahsoka Tano - Hands down Ahsoka is one of the easiest Jedi to farm for. She shows up in the Cantina Store and she has two nodes where she can be found Dark Side 4-C and Light Side 5-D (which has come choice gear on it). Ahsoka can supplement healing for Luminara and she’s also a must have in Fleet Battles. She plays well with others and I’ve often won arena battles where I was down to her and Fives and they made hash of my opponents. Ahsoka is great in mid-game and an excellent addition to your Jedi team. 

Ezra Bridger - After Ahsoka, Luminara and Mace, Ezra is probably the second easiest Jedi to farm for. He’s on a low Cantina Node (2-B) and he pops up in the Fleet Store with an annoying regularity. No, Game! I wanted Chirrut Shards! I don’t want Emo Blueberry Shards! Of the Phoenix Squad characters, he’s the one I kill first when I face a Phoenix team and he’s very useful wherever he goes. His bonus attacks can kill Baze and Fives and that takes some serious doing. He also has a ship (Phantom II) so that’s nice for your Fleet arena. 

Kanan Jarrus - Okay so with Kanan you’re going to have to balance his availability with whoever else you’re going for in the Squad Arena store but he’s another useful Jedi who can taunt, add protection and debuff your characters. He’s not super easy to get but if you’re going to get the Phoenix Squad he’s tied for second place with Hera after Ezra. 

Qui-Gon Jinn - *sighs* Get him. You’ll need him if you want to run a Jedi team. His leadership gives your team speed and he can call assists as well as debuffs. Don’t let my lackluster recommendation of everyone’s Neglectful Hippie Space Dad dissuade you. He’s useful and not hair-pullingly difficult to get.

Difficult to Farm but Worth It

Jedi Knight Anakin Skywalker - Oh my precious Rage Baby! So beautiful, so angry, so… squishy? If you’re going to have a Jedi team, you need to have Anakin on it. He does serious damage and he can also inflict healing and buff immunity for 2 turns. He plays very well with clones and Ahsoka. When Luminara gets her heal over time ability, that really helps shore Anakin up. He also has an AOE attack which I don’t think any other Jedi has. He’s only on four nodes (Dark Side 5-B, 7-D, Light Side 5-C and Cantina 7-G) so he’s not impossible to get I am looking at you Aayla Secura but he’s not easy either. Probably just the way Padme and Obi-Wan like it. 

Barriss Offee - Eh. Get the murderous wench. She’s the best healer in the game, for a back-stabbing-jedi-turned-terrorist. Like Anakin, she’s not in a store but she’s got four nodes (Dark Side 5-C, 5-E, 8-A and Cantina 6-A). She’s a popular for Zeta when you get to that (and that is still a long ways off for you so don’t worry about it.) 

So… uhmm… TL:DR

Ahsoka

Ezra/Qui-Gon

Whoever you didn’t go for last time in the Ezra/Qui-Gon mashup

Jedi Knight Anakin/Kanan Jarrus

Whoever you didn’t go for last time JK Anakin/Kanan Jarrus

Back-stabbin’ Barriss Offee

Holy Crap I went on forever! But onwards and upwards my dear! Here is part two!

REBELS

Because you will need Rebels to compete in all sorts of special events (Empire Themed events, Emperor Palpatine events, the new Territory battles) you are going to need Rebels. 

The good news is THERE ARE LOTS OF REBELS. SO MANY REBELS. LIKE MORE THAN WE NEED AND I AM AN AVOWED DISLIKER OF THE SITH/EMPIRE/FIRST ORDER CHARACTERS.

Right now your Squad Arena team is tilted in the direction of Jedi which is fine! I have had my butt handed to me by many a Jedi team before. I swear to the Force Yoda if you don’t leave my precious Wedge alone I am going to reach through the screen and strangle you! But a Rebels team is pretty much required to advance in the game and EA has given you a MYRIAD of options to chose from.

Which brings me to… Easy to Farm Rebels

Biggs Darklighter - Popular recently is a combination of Wiggs (Wedge Antilles + Biggs Darklighter) and Chaze (Chirrut Imwe + Baze Malbus). Now here’s a thing, or two, you need to know about these two combos. 

It’s REALLY effective.

It’s kind of a pain in the ass to get. 

The good news for you is that Biggs Darklighter is not only in the Galactic War Store (where if you defeat the table you have a chance to purchase up to 15 of his shards a day!) but he’s also located on Cantina Node 3-G and Dark Side Node 4-A. Biggs also has an X-Wing that taunts (I LOVE YOU, BIGGS) and he has amazing synergy with Wedge Antilles. If you can get an omega mat on his Comrade-in-Arms Super-Mega-Killshot attack, he can perform that every other turn. WHICH IS SO AMAZING. 

SO. 

AMAZING. 

So I highly recommend Biggs. Even if you don’t want to run a Rebels squad right now, he is worth it for his ship and that Comrade-in-Arms ability. 

Stormtrooper Han Solo - ST Han Solo has the advantage of being both a Rebel and a Scoundrel, which are ANNOYINGLY important in this game. It may not seem like it now but trust me, when you start Mod farming, you are going to need those credit heists desperately. Where is my Dave Chapelle Meme with the white powdery lips and “Y’all got any more of ‘dem Credit Heists?” ST Han is in the same boat as Kanan Jarrus as he’s only available in the Squad Arena store so if you have to pick between the two, go for ST Han while you’re going after Jedi elsewhere. 

ST Han can taunt and his taunt is particularly insidious because every time he takes a hit, his allies gain turn meter. I’ve seen him work well with all sorts of teams and I’ve seen him in the top level squads as well. 

Princess Leia - Her Royal Highness, the Crown Princess of Alderaan is a beast. On top of her stealth move (which apparently can cleanse some debuffs. *o*) her basic attack “Hair Trigger” allows her fire up to three times in one attack. Remember when I mentioned that Phoenix squad earlier? About the only person I have that is really capable of taking them down to size is Princess Leia. (And Fives, because Fives is indestructible.) She’s also an excellent counter to Grumpy Secessionist Grandpa Count Dooku. She got reworked when they introduced Commander Luke Skywalker so she should be even better now! 

Sadly, Our Lady of Sass and Cinnamon Rolls is only located in the Squad Arena store so you’ll have to juggle her against everybody else. I’ve also heard she’s great against Part 4 of the Tank Raid and works well with a team of Clones to form the fantastic portmanteaux of Princess Zody (Princess Leia + Zeta Cody). 

Last but most definitely not least is the Baron Administrator of Cloud City…

Lando Calrissian - To call Lando easy to farm is kind of misnomer. He only shows up on two Cantina nodes (1-E and 5-F and for me 5-F had a better drop rate than 1-E) but he’s on Cantina nodes and if you chose to use your crystals that way, you can get probably four to five shards a day for him as opposed to the limits placed on Light Side and Dark Side Battles. I have gotten more but that wasn’t until I opened up 5-F. 

Lando is, to put it bluntly, a stone cold mass murderer. Sure he looks all suave and charming and you think, “That man in the open neck blue shirt and that disco-tastic seventies gold lined cape looks charming and harmless! I’ll leave him alone and concentrate my forward power on Darth Vader or Jedi Knight Anakin or something like that. 

And then two, maybe three, Lando turns later you’re dead, your party is dead. Your neighbor is dead. EVERYONE IS DEAD. 

Not only does Lando have great leadership and a pretty good basic attack, his AOE attack will slaughter YOUR WHOLE TEAM. ALL OF THEM. I’ve seen my Lando take out an entire teams protection in one go! POOF! GONE. ALL OF IT. And then? If he scores a critical hit? (which he does with terrifying regularity when he’s on the opposing team) HIS COOL DOWN RESETS AND YOU ARE DOOMED TO BE PERFORATED BY BLASTER FIRE YET AGAIN.

See? Lando Calrissian: Stone Cold Mass Murderer. 

If Lando is paired up with Admiral Ackbar and Ackbar uses his Tactical Genius before Lando, you can perform his ORBITAL BOMBARDMENT OF DOOM TWICE IN A ROW. Lando is the Dread Pirate Roberts of Galaxy of Heroes. 

There will be no survivors.

Not only does Lando work great with your Rebels but like ST Han he’s a Scoundrel too so he’ll play well with a Scoundrel team in Credit and Droid Heists. 

TL;DR 

Biggs Darklighter

Stormtrooper Han Solo

Lando Calrissian 

Princess Leia

And then maybe Admiral Ackbar for cleansing and assisting Lando in his mass slaughter of your opponents.

I hope that was helpful, my dear! I wish you all the best in your galactic conquest! Have a great Wednesday and may the Force and RNGeezus be with you!

[mokkoriness]

A9 SPICE Interview for “IDEAL”

A9, with 12 years gone by since debut they've broken free more so than ever. The band's power of unity, and what lies at the origin.

It has already been 12 years since debut. These men, who give off and outstanding and grandiose presence as a Visual-kei band even more so than ever, are unstoppable if they can also make you laugh. Ever since their tour at the start of the year, 『【BLACK PERIOD】Dress code:BLACK』, thanks to (?) Nao (Dr), who is currently going wild by barging onto the stage of the other band during two-man lives and singing, and showing off not Sunshine Ikezaki but "Sunshine Nao" jokes during their own lives, A9 are showing us their intense vitality. We will present to you a one-of-a-kind amazing interview that talks about their first single as A9, 「MEMENTO」, their first full album 『IDEAL』, and the nationwide tour that starts on the album release day.

First of all, I would like to ask why Nao has been standing out in areas other than the drums ever since the 『【BLACK PERIOD】Dress code:BLACK』 tour. At SPICE, we did a live report on your show with DIAURA. Did you ask to perform together?

Nao: It was our first time seeing each other, so I went to greet them in the morning. During that tour I had previously barged onto DEZERT's stage, so when I asked them "Can I barge onto your stage today too?", they gave me ready consent, saying "By all means". So I did.

But when Nao barged onto their stage, yo-ka(vo) was really surprised.

Show: I remember that moment well too. Until that point in the show, we were really in the world of DIAURA, but when Nao appeared on stage, I ended up blurting out what I was thinking, "He really did it!" (laughs)

Nao: Maybe they didn't think I would actually do it.

But by barging onto the stage during another band's set and singing, or by becoming "Sunshine Nao" during your own live shows, Nao really is becoming a hit at a scarily fast rate (laughs). But why did you start doing Sunshine Nao in the first place?

Nao: I dunno (laughs). What was it again?

Tora: No one ever told you to do it, but you just did it on your own free will (laughs)

Hiroto: He did it out of the blue on the first day of the tour.

Tora: I thought that the really knew it (Sunshine Ikezaki's skit) well. I didn't even know the second half of the skit. That's why I think he memorised the whole thing.

Nao: I've known it for years now.

Show: How do you know? (laughs)

Nao: Because I knew his skits from the early years. I'm really touched that the time has come where we can see him on TV often.

And when Nao becomes Sunshine Nao and does this skit, he gets plenty of laughs.

Nao: If the people who came to see us have more moments, if even just briefly, where they can smile, then doing the skit is worthwhile.

What was the main motivation for A9 that made you think to do this tour with younger Visual-kei bands like DEZERT, DIAURA and Pentagon?

Show: After 1 or 2 years since first forming the band, rather than "working our way up", we already had some fans from the very beginning, so it's like we had skipped a step and kept on going upwards. Even our band activities were only solo shows. So we didn't really have a time where we worked hard to improve ourselves with a friendly rival. But after leaving our company and by appearing at live events, it felt like things were completely different. The lives that we could play with other bands were really motivating. And at the same time, last year we celebrated our 12th year anniversary. Since we also did a "returning to the starting point" live, we looked for some bands who we could battle with at livehouses regardless of seniority or career length, with the intention to start the band over again from our first year. That was the biggest motivation behind it.

And after this tour, you released your new single 「MEMENTO」 on February 28th. Here we thought all the members can introduce the song while playing the word chain game1.

Show: Then I'll start. "Memories strong enough to become a memento".

Hiroto: ......  "With large scale yet gorgeous elements".

Nao: Uh...... "This song that feels real (raises the volume of his voice), is an unprecedented (All members laugh), and raging new A9 song! A song that loves Visual Kei fans and is loved by Visual Kei fans! This is loved so much that songs like 「Shunkashuuto」「RAINBOWS」「the beautiful name」 are afraid of it!"

Show: He's still going (laughs).

Nao: "With 200 BPM and the drums in 16 beats, and the song that starts of with the drums that make me very, very nervous, A9! ME.ME.N.TO!!"

Tora: I guess he's done now (laughs)

Nao: "Yaaaaaaaay". Yes. Next (laughs).

Tora: Ack. He did it all so I've got nothing left to say (awkward smile). "Pretty good Visual Kei". Yes, next.

Saga: ...... There really is nothing left to say (awkward smile). "SMAP has disbanded". It finished on the "closing" letter.

Show: That was a fantastic ending (smiles)

That was an amazing relay. With what concept did you make this song?

Saga: As we kept on playing at live events, we slammed into the eternal problem of what it means to be "like A9". We're a band that does many different things, so no matter which part you try to isolate, it is only just one part of us. So if that was the case, we thought to just pack it all in there. The concept was to make a song that had all of the elements in it so you could say "This is all of A9". Also, for lives and especially for live events, we wanted a song where we could show our power. Whenever we made setlists for live events, we really had a lot of trouble. After wandering from three different major record labels, we came to this realisation of "Crap, we don't have any lead songs that are fit for lives" (awkward smile).

Show: Only King Records didn't say anything about having a lead song, but at that time, we chose songs within the company. For the other companies apart from King Records, the director clearly told us what kind of song they wanted and we made them.

So do you mean that this is the first single where the lead song is hard-hitting?

Saga: Yes, since 「Kowloon-NINE HEADS RODEO SHOW-」 and 「RAINBOWS」, which we released when on King Records. But with 「Kowloon」, it's more like the song became a lead song (laughs). 「RAINBOWS」 is a song that, at the time, was dissed a lot, such as A&R telling us "There's no way this can be a lead song". But the two songs are still here (laughs). I thought that as expected, a band should release band-like songs. 「MEMENTO」 is definitely a song that any major record label would not release as a single.

I felt that the lyrics must have come out from a really negative place.

Show: Yeah. It was just around the time where the band's environment was changing rapidly and there was lots of chaos in actuality and mentally too. What saved us then was, as expected, the memories of the times the fans and the band created together. Wanting to reach out again to that light. What made us think that was the fans' words. For this song, it has the image of coming out from a chaotic world and breaking out into the open during the chorus, so I felt like I had to link those two things. And though it's talking about negative things, I think that the lyrics also express facing the light and reaching out to the hand that saves you.

The truth is that no matter what happens, you will reach out to the light, and that is the reason why you've been able to continue on as a band. What do you think is the main reason why you've been able to do this with the same members for 12 years?

Nao: Because we're not finished yet. There are still many things we can do.

Show: It's because Nao sometimes～ says serious things like this, I get surprised (laughs)

Hiroto: Because he says it out of the blue.

Nao: No, no, no. I'm always serious.

Saga: Lately he's been saying "I'll get double eyelids". So it seems like he's not finished yet.

Show: There are still things he can do (laughs).

Saga: Since he's been standing at the front lately (as "Sunshine Nao"), maybe he's become more aware of aesthetics.

Oh, I see (laughs)

Nao: In the schedule for Thursday, it had "Nao Plastic Surgery" written there (laughs).

Tora: Everyone saw that and got afraid (laughs)

Saga: Like "Are you serious? People will be able to tell".

Nao: But actually I had really bad stuff shoulders so I went to see the orthopedist (laughs).

Saga: It was just abbreviated2

Show: I did a double-take at the schedule (laughs)

Puhahaha (laughs)

Show: Anyway, about why we can continue on. A long time ago at a bar in Takadanobaba, Nao said to me "You can talk to me about anything".

Nao: Ah. I kinda remember that.

Show: Ever since then, I get the feeling that he built this foundation of being a person that you could talk to about anything, even if it were something you couldn't tell your family. I think that is the secret behind us being able to continued.

Nao: Because bands are about team effort. In order to unify and keep on doing this, this kind of thing is important. Since we are chasing the same dream, it would be a waste to give up half-way, so we have to understand each other. Yaaaaay! Justice!!!!!

You're in fine form, Nao (laughs). Also, it seems like Tora edited the music video for 「MEMENTO」. Did you study footage editing?

Tora: No. I learnt it all from YouTube (laughs).

Show: Sometimes it's important to tell the truth.

Tora: I've always been interested in footage (flat out). So I learnt some things on my own.

Saga: Including porn.

Tora: I learned things from there too (laughs).

Making music and making footage. To you, Tora, do they feel like the same thing?

Tora: They're the same. To be honest, isn't footage more definite than music? With music, when you're making it yourself, it has this ambiguous feeling. It's hard to rate it because it's hard to determine whether it's good or bad. But with footage, it's easy to determine if it's good or bad, and it's easy to understand. So making the footage, I think "This is fun!". They are both similar in that I can make what I like.

What was the thing you focused on for 「MEMENTO」?

Tora: My intention was to pick up the members' good points, and because I'm their fellow member, I know what they are. If I watch the footage, I know which parts the members probably want me to use. I didn't choose the shots with the notion of making a music video. I chose the shots not based on the kind of shots a normal director would use at a certain spot, but based it on the kind of faces from the members that the fans probably want to see. I think that it really shows in the video.

Nao: But based on that way of thinking, didn't you want to shoot the footage yourself?

Saga: Like "I'm gonna film it".

Nao: You would be like "I'm sure I can film something better".

Tora: That's right! That's why lately, since I've pretty much learned everything about movie editing, I've been studying cameras (laughs)

Meaning that it's not impossible that Tora will make his debut as a director?

Saga: Then Tora won't be in the A9 music videos anymore.

Hiroto: Only the four of us will be there?

Tora: I'll edit myself in or something (laughs)

Show: Tora can film the four of us, and for his solo shots he can film it by making our manager Ohashi hold the camera and give directions, like "Yes, zoom in here".

All: (laughs)

Tora: If I could, I would like to do filming too.

Show: Lately I watched a music video and thought it was good, and it was filmed by the drummer of a band we once played together with. Band members have that kind of ability too.

Saga: Then in the future, Tora will be the Takahashi Ganari3 of the Visual Kei world.

Tora: Who is Takashi Ganari again?

Saga: The guy who founded "Soft On Demand"4

Nao: Since you're "Tora" (Takahashi Ganari's spread nationwide after appearing on a TV show called "Money Tiger")

Tora: The adult movie business? (laughs)

So about the song the second song, which Tora wrote, 「Ibara」. With what kind of concept was this song written?

Tora: Saga told me "Make a song that will be like the second 「Kowloon」. 「Kowloon」 is a violent song with downtuning. The song changes in a way that's easy to understand at points where the fans do different things like rushing towards the stage or headbang, but the chorus has a proper melody. So I made this song with the exact same concept.

Saga: But when we heard the song, it was much faster than 「Kowloon」, so it's not what I asked for!

Nao: We were like "This isn't 「Kowloon」".

Tora: Guhahaha (laughs)

The lyrics in this song is about resentment and grudges, it really is "an orchestra of abuse".

Show: The lyrics are like a curse. Up until now we never had such dark lyrics, so I think that in a good way, it betrays the people who like beautiful lyrics.

Saga: The other day during an in-store event, Hiroto and I talked about it, like "I wonder which member he is singing about in these lyrics".

Hiroto: We talked about what we should do if he was singing about us.

Show: It's not about any of the members (laughs)

So after this single, A9 will be releasing their first full-length album 『IDEAL』 on April 12th. What is the meaning of the title?

Show: When I was talking with Saga, the idea of having a hidden theme of wanting to make it an album where we redefine the songs of ours that are loved by the fans came. The word "IDEA" and the word "REAL". We also had the theme of wanting to discuss these things while in the between that ideal and real. So we got the title by adding "IDEA" and "REAL" together.

What kind of album, which is currently being recorded (the interview took place late February), do you think it will be?

Saga: We had the image of wanting to make an album like a first album. That's why it's an album that only has songs that show what we are good at, and the kind of songs that lie at our roots. Like all of the songs show what we are good at. I think that's what first albums are. It's because bands do what they are good at in their first album, and using that as a base, they keep on progressing. Up until now we made albums conscious of making "something new and different from before". But this time we had the exact opposite way of thinking. We thought to make something that was like an update of the past. When we tried to make an album that we could only make now since we returned to our starting point, it ended up being an album that was not just a mere update. I think that the result is perhaps a new A9. We're still in the middle of recording though.

Show: If I can write lyrics with this kind of schedule, I want everyone to thank me (laughs)

Saga: I've made an agreement with Show that I'll introduce him to some girls (laughs). Extremely beautiful ones.

Show: (Immediately) We did not!

So I hope you can finish the album with any problems. Finally, please tell us your aspirations for the nationwide tour 『A9 2017 TOUR IDEAL HORIZON』 for this album that starts on April 12th.

Show: Before we knew it, we're almost in the 13th year of the band. We're a band that has a real varied collection of songs, but the fans tell us that no matter what kind of hard and dark songs we do, they can see the light, so if you come see us on this tour, we will definitely make you happy. That's why I would like for you to all come without any hesitation.

Hiroto: The things we've built up over the years, and the feeling of excitement just like that time we put out our first album, wondering what it would lead to, and the anticipation of wanting to move toward the ideal that is still unknown to us. I want to make it that kind of tour.

Tora: It's been a while since we released a full album, so don't be late or miss this moment, where the mood of the live shows change!

Saga: We're going harder and showing what lies at the band's core this time, so I'm looking forward to it.

Nao: It's a tour in conjunction with our first single in 3 years and A9's first passionate full album, so I hope you come and see us. Also, I want more people to know. About my craziness (laughs)

1This part was too hard to make it work in English

2The word for "orthopedics 整形外科" is often shortened to "整形", which most people interpret to mean "plastic surgery"

3An adult film director

4An adult video site

Original Article: https://spice.eplus.jp/articles/116757

Photo Credits: Hidemi Otsuka / SPICE

[blazinbeautywrites]

Band Wars

Note: Due to recent events and the rampant uprising of plagiarism on this site and others I am stating once and once only that this is my ORIGINAL work. If I find out that you have stolen/taken any part of my work I will handle you and the situation the way I see fit.

Any gif or pic I use is credited to the original owner

Length: 2,279 Words

Genre: Comedy and Angst

When Big Hit first announced that they’d finally be debuting a girl group everyone was excited. Bang Si Hyuk held multiple press conferences to discuss his secret girl group that he’d been training for 7 years. Not much was given away as he wanted to surprise the world. One by one teaser images were released and people began recognizing the girls from a few Big Hit trainee projects. Big Hit were applauded for the diversity of their group, leading the girls to have one of the most talked about debuts ever. LOTUS was here and they were taking the kpop industry by storm.

*6 months after debut*

“Again!” Sienna commanded. The rest of LOTUS obeyed as the girls ran through their choreography for what felt like the 100th time that day.

“Aish! We’re exhausted. Let’s just go back to the dorms get some rest and we can come back later,” Yeona said before taking a long sip from her water bottle.

“She’s right. We keep messing up the simplest moves because we’re running on little to no sleep. We need rest,” Areum said.

“We have to practice until we get it right. Our showcase is in one week. I’ll be damned if we go on stage looking a hot fucking mess,” Sienna argued.

“I know but look at us, we’re a mess. We need a break and I know you’re the leader but I’m older and I say we are going home. So let’s call it a day cuz I’m starving,” Areum said already packed and ready to go.

“Fine but I’m going to the gym upstairs. I’m too annoyed to do anything else,” Sienna said. She grabbed her bags to leave giving her group members a faint smile before disappearing into the hallway.

“Is she okay? She seems more on edge than normal lately,” Yeona asked, packing up her things.

“Well I heard from Yoongi that Namjoon broke off that little fling he and Sienna had and she is bitter as fuck,” Ximena said.

“Jesus what is with you and Yoongi? Yall fucking or some shit?” Tasia asked.

“Hell no! He and I just love to talk shit so he always gives me the rundown on things. Okay and maybe he let me sit on his face once but it was just that one time. Plus if I was gonna fuck anyone it’d be Jimin. That’s my baby right there,” Ximena said.

“Bitch you nasty but shid if Min Yoongi told me to sit on his face I’d do it to,” Tasia said, laughing with her bandmates.

“Alright can we go now? I really need some food and a shower,” Yeona whined.

“Okay okay let’s go before she falls out,” Areum said, leading the girls to the dorm elevators.

*Upstairs gym 1 hour later*

“Oh my god why did I come here?” Sienna mumbled as she finished her intense workout. As she blindly reached out for a towel to wipe her sweat she felt hands run up her sides. She jumped and nearly fell over. Areum was laughing her ass off at the fact that she succeeded in scaring her.

“What the hell Areum?” Sienna yelled.

“Oh stop being a baby. You done working out?” Areum asked.

“Yeah. I’m fucking starving though. What did you guys order?” Sienna asked.

“We got pizza and some junk food. Might as well pig out tonight after all the work we put in today,” Areum said.

“That’s shitty logic and makes zero sense but I don’t give a fuck so let’s go,” Sienna said. The girls left the gym and on their way back they were stopped by Bang PD.

“Sienna can I speak with you for a moment?” Bang PD said.

“Yes sir,” Sienna replied. Areum looked on as Sienna walked into his office and closed the door behind her.

“Sienna, I assume you’re familiar with the show After School Club?” Bang PD asked.

“Yes I am. If you don’t mind me asking, but are you finally gonna let us go on the show? Sienna said excitedly. Bang PG laughed at her eagerness and nodded his head.

“Yaaaaay! I’m sorry sir I’m just really happy! We’ve always wanted to go on ASC,” Sienna said. She was jumping up and down so much that he had to steady her shoulders to keep her grounded.

“I can see that but I must warn you that the episode you’re gonna be featured on will also include GOT7. Now I know you’ve had issues with Jaebum since your debut but I need you to be on your best behavior. Don’t let him get to you,” Bang PD said.

“Okay with all do respect sir, I don’t have any issues with Jaebum at all. If anything he’s the one witht the issue…but I promise I’ll do my best,” Sienna said.

“On the up chance that he does insult you, just please don’t cause a national crisis. Now please go and relay the news to the other girls,” Bang PD said.

“Okay. Thank you for the opportunity,” Sienna bowed and exited his office. She stormed to the elevators trying to calm her nerves but to no avail. Once she’d gotten to her group’s dorm she smelled the pizza and almost threw up.

“Wooooah you look like shit. What’s wrong?” Ximena asked. Sienna struggled to gather her thoughts.

“Umm we finally got our wish I guess,” She stated taking a seat next to Yeona on the couch.

“What do you mean?” Areum asked taking a seat on the floor grabbing another slice of pizza.

“I mean we’re going on ASC. Bang PD just told me,” Sienna said. The other girls began screaming and celebrating but quickly stopped when they saw that Sienna was still seated with an annoyed expression on her face.

“Okay why the hell do you look like you were punched in the gut?” Tasia asked.

“Our episode also includes GOT7,” Sienna said. She sat back against the couch and groaned.

“Wow. Uhh okay. It won’t be that bad. I mean the rest of the boys are fine,” Areum said.

“Yeah it’s just JB. We got your back so don’t stress over this,” Yeona said.

“It’s not okay though. I don’t appreciate that wack ass shit he said about me. The sad part is that I admired him and in all our interviews after we debuted I spoke highly of him and he just shitted on me,” Sienna said holding back tears. Tasia sat next to her and held her, attempting to soothe her. Ximena, Yeona, and Areum joined them and hugged both girls. Though they were all women of color, the others girls knew that it was hard for Sienna and Tasia to live in a country where the white skin, skinny, porcelain doll beauty standard was ideal. Areum thought back to the time she saw Sienna purging herself in order to fit more with the other, slimmer trainees. It broke her heart sometimes when she saw the hate her bandmates received. Ximena is Latina but she knew damn well that she and her complexion were more eagerly embraced than that of her black bandmates. The girls don’t know how long they were sat like that but they were startled by the ringing of their doorbell. Yeona ran to get it and was annoyed immediately. Mark, Yugyeom, Jackson and a visibly irritated JB stood at their door, shivering from the cold.

“Hey Mark, Yugyeom, Jackson……..JB,” Yeona greeted. It was no secret that the ladies of LOTUS couldn’t stand JB but they were at least cordial with him seeing as BTS and GOT7 collab a lot and are really good friends.

“That’s JB oppa to you sweetie,” JB said, giving her a smirk.

“You fucking wish asshole. Why are yall here anyway?” Yeona asked.

“Well we going to a gaming cafe to play some games and you guys’ dorm is on the way so we decided to come stop by and say hello but you have a shitty attitude,” Jackson said. Yeona narrowed her eyes and looked away from him.

“Whatever, come on in,” Yeona said opening the door wide enough for them to walk through. She soon walked away and vanished into her room.

“Hey ladies!” Jackson yelled. One by one the girls greeted Jackson then waved at the others. However, JB lingered near the door and when he looked up his eyes locked with Sienna’s bloodshot ones. Jackson saw Sienna and immediately knew why she was upset having texted her a few days prior.

“Hey Jackson,” Sienna said. Jackson hugged her back, hands skimming her ass a bit.

“Well I see you been eating right. Your ass is getting fatter,” Jackson said.

“Jesus Jackson!” Sienna whacked him hard on the arm causing them both to burst out laughing. He was happy to see her smiling.

“Boy could you be anymore thirsty?” Tasia said.

“Why? You jealous? You know you fine too,” Jackson teased. Tasia smirked at him then went over to talk to Jinyoung, who was a little to happy to see her.

“So how have yall been? I feel like we haven’t seen you ladies in a minute,” Mark said.

“We’re working on a few projects and some new music. We’ve also got a showcase next week and Little Miss Drill Sergeant has been running us into the ground with practices and shit,” a disgruntled Ximena said.

“She’s a perfectionist. What do you expect?” Mark says glancing over at Sienna talking with Jackson. His jaw clenched a bit but averted his eyes quickly hoping no one noticed. Ximena left to talk to Yugyeom, leaving Areum with Mark.

“So are you ever going to tell Sienna that you want her to have your babies?” Areum asked. Mark looked at her with wide eyes and almost choked.

“What….how….,” Mark stumbled.

“Look we all know you like her. Even she knows and she lowkey likes you too. After that shit with Namjoon she really just wants to focus on the music and not deal with a man. My advice to you is to continue to be her friend and maybe one day when yall are drunk off your asses she’ll fuck the shit out of you,” Areum said. She got up and left a stunned Mark sitting on the couch. Nearby sitting on a stool JB heard the entire conversation. He became a bit more agitated. If only everyone knew the truth.

“Well this has been fun but we have to go. I only reserved a private room for an hour,” JB said. As he walked to the door he looks at Sienna who was hugging Mark goodbye.

“Call me tonight okay? You too Jackson!” Sienna said.

“Of course. We’ll make it a three way,” Jackson said.

“Omg get out!!” Sienna laughed, pushing Jackson and Mark out the door. Once they were gone she grabbed a slice of pizza and plopped back down on the couch.

“I swear I need to know you’re secret. You got all these guys falling all over you and shit. First Namjoon, now Jackson and Mark. Oh and let’s not forget that one year during our trainee days when you and JB dated,” Ximena stated.

“XIMENA! THEY DON’T KNOW ABOUT JB!” Sienna yelled.

“Ohhhh….oops,” Ximena said.

“You dated JB for a whole year? How did yall not get caught? I mean I know we don’t have a dating ban but he did at the time,” Tasia said.

“I know. That’s why I broke it off. I just got tired of sneaking around. I was a trainee and I wanted to debut so bad so I focused on myself and the group. He didn’t like that so I stopped talking to him. I was harsh of me at the time but I thought I was doing what was best for me,” Sienna said.

“Okaaaay but how the hell did Namjoon come into the mix?” Areum asked.

“He and Jackson knew about JB and I and when they found out we broke up they invited me out and we got super drunk. Long story short Jackson passed out and Namjoon slept together that night,” Sienna replied.

“Wow, quite the triangle you have there,” Ximena said.

“Yeah and it got even more complicated once Namjoon and I started sleeping together more often. Feelings got involved but then Bang PD found out and told us to break up. He didn’t want the relationship to affect our debut and BTS’s comeback. I agreed to end it and he fought for us to stay together. I still feel bad that I just walked away from him but what can I do? It’s too late now anyway,” Sienna said.

“…..And Mark?” Tasia asked.

“Mark and I will have to remain friends. I can’t be known in the industry as a homie hopper. That shit ain’t cute besides, I much rather flirt with him cuz it’s funny as hell. Now can we drop this? I’m hungry and the new season of How to Get Away with Murder is on netflix and I’m in the mood for a binge,” Sienna whined.

“Fine, I’ll get the wine and some more snacks and we can binge watch your show,” Areum said, disappearing into the kitchen.

“I really love you guys,” Sienna said. Areum returned quickly with 4 glasses and a bottle of red wine. She poured the wine then gave each girl a glass.

“We love you too even though you’re a little whore,” Ximena said. Sienna nearly choked on her wine as she laughed. The others soon joined in and their girls night was officially underway. They had no idea shit was about to hit the fan and hit it hard.

Chapter 2