#yOU CANT FUCKING SWITCH UP 2 MINUTES INTO THE SONG LIKE THAT i was WONDERING WHERE THAT CLIP WAS

[chisungie]

.

[chaotic-adhd-babe]

Being ADHD and a die hard introvert is just like

*hyperfixates on books as a child*

*brings a book to read alone at recess everyday in middle school/ junior high like clockwork*

*cannot read a new fictional book to save your life after the age of 19*

*spends friday night alone at home drinking your favorite alcoholic drink with the tv playing bobs burgers on in the background and switching back and forth between that and How the Universe Works, Reading your favorite fiction book that youve read a million times, online shopping, working on your WIP, on tumblr, Journaling, on pinterest and brainstorming/daydreaming shit about your WIP all at the same time, Happy and content as can be*

*stays up until 5 am hyperfocusing on making a schedule to make it easier to not stay up until 5 am regularly anymore*

*feeling self conscious and feeling your stomach tighten with nerves anytime someone mentions adhd at work, Determined to Not Let Them Know that you, yourself are an ADHD*

*Considers socializing with new coworkers*

*straight up forgets to socialize with new coworkers while standing around with them with no tasks to do*

"Hhhm wonder if I should give dating a shot again"

*5 minutes later, after thinking about the idea for more than 20 seconds*

"Lol nope"

"I got RSD after minorly fucking up at work today and I felt like my limbic system was trying to kill me but I successfully contained all of it with my poker face but yeah haha how was your day"

*holds entire venting conversations about your childhood with your dog sitting on the kitchen floor at 2 am*

"Well this is not the smartest thing Ive ever done but Lol its also not the dumbest thing Ive ever done"

*listens to the same song for 3 hours straight*

"You cant have adhd you're so quiet!!! :) " *dies out of frustration*

"Lol why do you never talk"

*drags around the "why cant you do anything right you dumbass - this is not difficult why is it so hard for you" and the "goody-two shoes - honor roll - nerd - kinda semi smart but you gotta apply yourself - I wish youd participate more - Quiet weird girl- Pleasure to have in class" sterotypes until you are 209 years old*

*falls down the stairs while daydreaming about your upcoming day off* Whoops

"I am hilarious why is no one around right now to listen to me"

"Small talk scripts all the way, until death"

[eberles]

i hate u, i love u

Rafe Cameron

(gif by @toesure :)

Request: A Rafe fic based on the song “I hate u, I love you” by gnash (ft Olivia O’Brien) PLEASE MAJOR RAFE VIBES 🥺💖 @fav-imagines

A/N: I wanted to cry writing this lol idk why but it hit me right in the feels!! it’s kind of all over the place, if anyone is confused by, don’t worry bc i am too!!!! lol anyways enjoy!! (this is probably the first thing ive ever written that goes with rafe’s character) bold = lyrics, italics = flashbacks

Warnings: angst, mentions of drugs, cheating, lying, toxic relationship, swearing

feelin used, but im still missin you and i cant see the end of it just wanna feel your kiss against my lips and now all this time is passing by, but i still cant seem to tell you why it hurts me every time i see you, realize how much i need you

I’ve spent months sitting in my room staring at the ceiling, and at the walls. I did a full Bella Swan from New Moon and let 3 months go by without being present for any of them. I didn’t care honestly...Even after spending all that time alone, i’m not still not healed from the heartache that was caused by him. I still miss him, his scent, his kisses, his clothes, everything. Rafe.

I went out once and he was the last person I wanted or planned to see, but of course, he was the only person I actually saw. Sure, there were other people around, but none of them mattered. Everyone else felt greyed out except for him. He was the only light I could see in those short moments. Everything felt like it was moving in slow motion, my breath hitched in my throat and it felt like there was no air left to breathe.

After months it still hurts to see him again. It hurts because I realized I still need him even after everything. I hate him. So why do I love him? The feeling of him being the only one I want, the one nobody could ever replace...it’s overwhelming and I can’t seem to shake it. But me? He replaced. It looked like it was easy from my point of view. He needed her, wanted her, and i’m not her.

i miss you when i can’t sleep or right after coffee or right when i can’t eat, i miss you in my front seat, still got sand in my sweaters from nights we don’t remember. do you miss me like i miss you? fucked around and got attached to you.

My head was consumed on thoughts of you. It was constant. Like the leaky faucet in the bathroom or the loose floorboard. Always running, always broken. I miss you. Maybe you’ll come around, but for now...I wish you were here instead. When it’s late and I can’t sleep, I think about you. When it’s early and I can’t eat, I think about you.

“Where are we going?” you giggled excitedly, grabbing my hand from across the console in my truck.

“Shh, I told you it’s a surprise baby, we’re almost there anyways.” I laughed at her giggling like a kid, she had so much excitement in her eyes. She was always ready for anything, even if it was 2 in the morning and I love that about her. I love everything about her.

“Ugh fine!” she groaned dramatically and rolled her eyes in a full circle looking up at the ceiling. “Why are we at the beach?” you didn’t even give me enough time to answer before jumping out of the truck and running towards the sand laughing the entire way to the water. Once I caught up with you, I grabbed your hands and pulled you close into my chest, kissing your forehead. When we broke apart I laid down a few blankets on the sand, noticing you were cold, I also gave you my sweater.

We stared at the stars and talked about anything and everything for hours. It felt magical. We stayed until the sun came up, watching the sunset before driving back to my house for some much needed rest.

Walking over to my closet, curious to know if that same sweater ended up back in my closet after that night. I reached in, digging around not finding anything and decided to look in my dresser instead. Of course, it was folded neatly in the drawer you used to call yours. Grabbing and shaking it out I noticed the light pieces of sand that fell from it. I brought it in to my nose wondering if it still smelt like your perfume. It did. I’m always tired lately, but never of you. Do you miss me too?

if i pulled a you on you, you wouldn’t like that shit, i put this reel out, but you wouldn’t bite that shit. i type a text then i never mind that shit, i got these feelings, but you never mind that shit. you’re still in love with me but your friends don’t know.

To Y/N: i wanna talk, i think...maybe i miss y-

*delete*

To Rafe: I miss you so much, it hurt someti-

*delete*

“Y/N...what’s going on? You’re off in never never land! Do you still miss him?” Kiara asked, gently shaking my knee to gain my attention back to the group. I looked at her and around at the rest of the pogues and put a smile on my face, shaking my head.

“Of course not, it’s been months! I’m so over him, guys. Besides even if I did, it wouldn’t matter.” I tried so hard to sound confident. I hope they bought it. Of fucking course, I miss Rafe. I’m still in love with him for gods sake. I hate that I want him.

✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿

Sure, i’ve moved on, but I think about y/n, just about everyday. I guess for me, moving on is finding someone new, but not actually wanting anyone new. I just couldn’t bare to be alone anymore with my thoughts. I deserve better than that, personally.

“Anyways Topper, if y/n wanted me still, she would say so right?” I looked at Topper, silently hoping he would lie to me, just tell me what I want to hear, man. “If I were her, I would’ve never let me go. She’s missing out.”

“Hell yea, dude! That’s the right attitude.” Topper said, jumping up to high five me. Of course, that was the statement he was on board with. I hate that I want you.

✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿

I haven’t been to a party in months, Kiara and Sarah thought that this would be the most fitting post-break up activity for me. Maybe meet a new guy or something. I tuned out when they were telling me about it and just agreed. What I neglected to listen to, was that it was a kook party. So now, i’m at a party alone, since my friends ditched me to dance with each other. And on top of that, I watch him watch her, like she’s the only girl he’s ever seen.

It took less than an hour of being at this party for us to end up in a room alone together.

“You don’t care! You never did!” Rafe shouted, running his hands through his hair, clearly exasperated with this conversation. I don’t even know how it started. One minute I was watching him with another girl, and the next he was hauling me off, away from everyone.

“You don’t give a damn about me, Rafe! How is it you never notice that you’re slowly killing me?” you wanted to yell back at him, to scream at him for putting you through this again, but you couldn’t. He didn’t say anything in return so you continued, “I hate you, and I hate that I love you, Rafe.” I’ve tried to move on, but even the simple thought of dating anyone but him, makes me physically ill. Why does it have to be like this?

“I don’t mean no harm, I just miss you on my arm, babe. Do you ever wonder what we could’ve been y/n?” He’s taunting me by asking dumb questions, as if I wanted this to happen, as if i’m the cause of all of this. Rafe’s the one that was closed off, not me. Of course, he switches the stories and i’m sure everyone at this damn party thinks I left him heart broken.

“You have a girlfriend, why are you even asking me that?” I was starting to get angry, I felt like he was toying with me.

He’s laughing. Of fucking course, he’s laughing at me. This is all one big fucking joke to him. “Lie to me, lie with me, get your fucking fix. Isn’t that what you always told your friends Rafe?” I was furious, how could he act that way after everything? He’s still a child though, that will never change.

✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿

You were right. I did lie to you, multiple times. About where I was, who I was with, what I was doing. I didn’t want you to know I was such a fuck up. You didn’t deserve the pain of finding out I was lying and cheating and drugging. You did anyways though. Now all my drinks and all my feelings are all fucking mixed.

“Rafe! Come dance with me!” I downed the rest of my drink before throwing the glass down and walking away from the new girl I was seeing. I didn’t care anymore.

I don’t want you, Y/N. I shouldn’t fucking miss you. I don’t deserve to! Seeing you again is such bullshit. If you wouldn’t have shown up here, I wouldn’t have said those things to you. Sometimes you gotta burn some bridges, just to create some distance. You didn’t deserve that, I knew it, but at least now you might learn your lesson and stay away. It’s for the best, right?

I hate that I love her, but I can’t put nobody else above her.

✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿

I wasn’t sure if I had the closure I needed, but after that particular conversation with Rafe I felt a little better. I returned to the party with my head held high and danced with my friends. I hoped he was watching me too since i’m not sure what he was trying to do by joking around at my expense. But maybe if he thinks it didn’t bother me he will know how it fucking feels. 

I learned from my dad that it’s good to have feelings when love and trust is gone. I guess this is moving on. I hate you, I love you.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

[lordseochangbin]

lordseochangbin’s jype series smut: music producer

requested: daddy kink 

you shoved your face into the pillow, crashing onto the couch as you seemed to fail yet again at making a beat for the new track you were walking on. you dressed well today, a tight black skirt with a black denim skirt that hugs your waist but it didn’t change your mood nor your ability to make music.

honestly speaking you were new to the studio, starting off other producers saw your potential and decided to have you be the main producer for one of jyp’s newest girl groups.

this was an amazing job, considering you had left america to pursue a career and you felt you had zero confidence in actually making it in. but now here you were, having a mental breakdown in the studio after getting two hours of sleep trying to cram in a nice track before the deadline.

it was stressful.

you managed to keep your eyes open in front of the computer screen fiddling with some last minute adjustments before you could here one of jyp’s music directors come in.

considering he didn’t speak proper english and it had only been your second week into your korean class, it was hard to communicate back and forth.

“how is your work?” the director asked confidently.

you turned around in excitement from the english, not sure if you understood correctly due to the accent.

“i haven’t finished it yet, im so sorry. just give me another 2 hours ill get it done!!”

the director glared at you in confusion but by your expression figured what had happened.

“argh!” he exclaimed, “i can’t work with these american producers!”

your eyes started to tear up. this was the downside of being in korea, you always felt left out. of course korea is open to visitors but living here felt like an outsider in a different world and the fact that you had no time to do your korean classes didn’t help much.

as you whipped your tears you felt a tall blonde enter the room, his confidence gleaming almost as if he owned the room. “did you need my help?” he peeked in whispering to the director.

his hair was wet, his shirt damp of sweat from practicing with the rest of his group. it was bang chan, the leader of stray kids. part of the musical group 3racha, whose beats you had always admired.

the director came to chan and whispered a new words into his ear before turning back to you and waving goodbye. “take care...”

chan stood there for a few seconds, then walking about to the couch and sitting down. you turned around to view him from the front of your recording set.

“hi, my names y/n”

“haha, i know. i’ve seen you around! nice to meet you”

“you too!! wow im really sorry to interrupt you during practice i know it’s probably hard to cram in all this stuff an-“

“don’t worry about it. id love to help you” bang chan interrupted, pulling out his laptop.

you sat next to him as he pulled out some tracks, “here let me show you some 3racha tracks that i have.. just the music”

one of the tracks started playing causing your jaw to drop, “dude!! that beat is sick!” you praised.

bang chan’s eyes widened as he tried to pause the song, “wait this track-” you listened attentively, wondering why bang chan wouldnt be proud of it

“chan what’s the problem?” before chan could pause the track you heard the sounds of heavy moans added to the background, causing you to bite your lip

chan shut down the laptop, looking towards you in embarrassment. 

“i..i’m sorry about that y/n”

you laughed as his cheeks turned red, “pfft, sorry? that’s exactly why girls are on their knees for you chan. you’re literally the hot shot of stray kids”

chan raised his eyebrows at your response, “you think so?”

“pfft.. don’t get too flattered. that’s everyone else’s opinion”

he placed a hand on your knee, pulling himself closer to you almost inches away from your face. “maybe i could change that”

you placed a finger under his chin, pulling him even closer. “the only thing i need help with...” you pushed him to the side before continuing, “is my music”

“oh come on!” he exclaimed, grabbing your hips making you fall onto his lap.

chan pulled back from hair from your face before staring lustfully into your eyes, “y/n.. i think the first thing you need to do is get rid of that stress.”

you pulled away from his lap, lying on your stomach as you buried yourself into the pillow. you were unconvinced that chan could help you with just that before he gripped his hands onto your shoulders, massaging them gently. 

it was a few seconds of heaven as he rolled his palms on your back, “chan.. that feels so good..how did you-”

chan removed his hands, laughing as you turned around.��“chan.. why’d you stop?”

“i dont think i can continue to help, you said i wasn’t the hot shot of stray kids” he shrugged, putting his laptop away.

you watched as he stood up, is he being for real?

“no wait chan-” you sighed, rolling your eyes. you approached him slowly, covering the door so he couldn’t leave

“you are.. the most hottest, sexiest, cutest member of stray kids” you continued sarcastically

“i think you forgot talented.” he said

“i think we can leave that out for today” you grabbed his hand, guiding him back to the couch.

“now help me.. pleaseeee” you pleaded.

“honestly speaking, i think you need to find some sort of inspiration”

“what’s yours? sex?” you spurted out

chans jaw clenched, making you stutter a bit. “l-look sorry i tend to be a little-”

“no..” chan interrupted, his voice low. “i get it. you think you’re funny right? flirty? with you skirt so close to your cunt.. i could fuck you over in seconds. i’m gonna tease you everyday until you break”

you laughed, slapping your hand onto his chest. “chan.. or chris. i know i’ve only been here for a few months and you might think of me as inexperienced in music, but i have to confess i am much more experienced in other things.”

you grabbed his hand, placing it under your skirt as he grabbed your thigh. “so if you think you’re ‘turning me on’ right now, or whatever the fuck you think you’re doing chan, try again” you smiled widely before standing up to grab your things and left the room.

perhaps you could say you took chan’s breath away. he had never met a girl as sexy as you. compared to the way you looked when he came to now, it was almost like you had a switch to you. you realized it to, how did his presence bring you such confidence? 

chan kept his word. with every interaction he found some way to get his hands on you, some way to keep you distracted, some way to get you riled up. but you contained all of this distress until you got home, determined to make sure he doesn’t get what he wants. 

but the dildo didn’t help.

should you give him a shot? you wondered to yourself

the question got you thinking about bang chan all night in bed until you decided to text him.

me: chan.. it’s y/n 

bang chan: aw babygirl, feeling needy now?

you read the message smirking as you imagined bang chan at your door. you thought about it, maybe he was as sexy as his fans put him out as. 

your reply said nothing of the sort.

me: no, i just needed up with music

bang chan: are you sure it’s just music y/n?

your legs started the grab the comforter, no longer being able to take the heat in between them

me: no.. i

me: i just cant stop thinking about you in between my legs. i want you so bad

bang chan: y/n.. now thats what i like to hear

bang chan: i swear to you one night i wont stop fucking you until your legs are shaking and the neighbors know my name

you gasped at the text, throwing your phone on the floor and grabbing your pillow. your cheeks flushed red at the thought of bang chan, what he was capable of. that night you went to bed thinking about him right next to you, he was even in your dreams. you had fallen in love with bang chan.

~~~

the next day around 8 am when you arrived at the jyp building you walked down the hall full of studios, interrupted by a hand that slammed you hard against the wall.

“missed me?” bang chan asked

you scoffed under your breath, “you wish” you replied before continuing the walk. once you opened the door to the studio you were off the floor and inside the arms of bang chans’. 

“this outfit of yours is really nice, for whom? i wonder” you wore a white crop top with a black and red plaid skirt, along with some combat boots to complete a cute school girl look, which obviously turned him on.

“chan..chan the music” you responded, realizing the director might come soon.

“ok i finished editing the track you need to show to the director, he should be here in 30” he said, carefully putting you on the black leather couch. 30 minutes...would that be enough?

the second he sat on the couch you couldn’t hold back anymore. you trapped him against the cushion, thrashing your lips against his, rolling your hips on him, your hands exploring all over bang chan. you wanted it all.

the kiss took him by surprise, his hands picking you up from the bottom of your thighs and lifting you onto his lap. 

your core felt like soaring fire at this point, and it being pressed against his cock didn’t help a single bit. 

“daddy please.. i need you right now. all i can think about is you. you teased me enough please” you whimpered.

“i’m sorry.. what did you call me?”

“d-daddy. please fuck me” you panted, the feeling of member growing under you was taunting. you couldn’t stand it anymore, and bang chan loved that.

“fuck.. look at my babygirl” he said, his thumb sliding across his cheeks before he could harshly grab your chin. “y/n is so good and submissive.. and its 8 in the morning, i can only imagine how much sleep you lost last night”

he forced two digits to pass your lips, “suck”. his thumb held your face straight, his eyes dark and full of need as you grind on his hips, him jerking into you every once in awhile.

soon he dragged his fingers away from your lips, leaving them to part as he removes his t-shirt and soonly after both of your clothes and thrown onto the hard floor. 

“chan.. he’s coming in 25 minutes we’re gonna get caugh-”

chan sealed your worries with a kiss, his fingers playing around your folds as he felt your bare skin against his. 

it was weird, you thought, to see him bare naked under you. his member was massive as well, the thought of it inside you leaving you to drool.

chan’s member brushed against your entrance making you grip tighter on his arms. “chan” you pouted, “just fuck me already”

your actions resulting in a few spanking from chan however, “what did you call me babygirl?” 

his voice made you whimper, your voice stuttering as you replied, “d-d-daddy... please i need you so bad”

chan smirked, “you’re not such a good girl anymore huh? always in need of daddy’s big cock”

“my daddy is the bestest” you replied innocently, taking chan by surprise when you get on all floors, yourself in between in legs as you lick a strip of his member.

“y/n...” he softly moaned your name, giving you motivation to suck on his dick. 

his hands grabbed your hair, pushing you closer to him and fucking your mouth. chan smirked as you looked up to him, the way you made him feel, like he was the most blessed man on this planet.

“you’re so beautiful” he praised as you sucked on his tip, his hips bucking as he fucked you harder. you leaned back this time, your core throbbing on inactivity, your fingers not helping a single bit. 

it was about time when you got on top of chan, sinking down on his member slowly. your teeth gnawed onto chan’s neck as you felt your walls being stretched to his size, “you’re so big daddy”

chan sped up his pace with no warning, giving you no time to adjust. your hands gripped onto his shoulders as your heard chan say, “i-i think i’m gonna cum. you sucked me off so well babygirl”

“let’s ride it off together” you said in a shaky voice. seconds later, both of you released on each other before you could hear a few knocks from the door. frantically you jumped from chan’s lap, throwing him his clothes and putting on yours.

“i’m coming!!” you replied.

“that’s what she said” chan replied with a smirk, you sending a deadly glare at him as you forced on your skirt. 

“help me with this?” you asked chan, gesturing at your zipper.

“are you wearing no underwear?” your eyes glowed as you shut his mouth, running over to answer the door. you felt relieved almost, despite your job being at stake if the music wasn’t good enough. you opened the door to see the tall man with a suit on. 

“how’d she do?” the director asked chan as he walked into the studio.

“y/n.. she was perfect.”

[zackmephisto]

dirt watches aew

ITS TIME BITCHEZ

stop i don't want to see this betrayal :(

mjf turned and now my depression is Worse i hate him i love him :(

JURASSIC EXPRESS AAAAAA

N Y L A YES OG MY GOD

i know I didnt hear yall boo nyla.

HANGMAN AND PAC REEEE

SCUUUUU REEEEE

M I S T E R M O X L E Y

:'''''(

STOP IM GONNA CRY KENNY NOOO

is it really nakazawa v mox. that's wild

mox looks good wtf?

STOP pulling the crazy shit dude. hes a good boy.

is he wrestling in pants bc his legs got fucked up or

that was weak. wtf ?

is it just bc hes still sort of hurt and they want to book him stronger than kenny?

o he speak

"you are one radical son of a bitch" how come he can say bitch but chuck cant say the s word

👀

damn yeah what's next for him. he really did fuck up kenny. who is next. I'm excited idc who is next like.... whoever it is they're gonna be working w the best of the best tbh

wait what the fuck why is it a championship match with sammy and chris and scu. why

cheer dark order and their gimp army you FUCKING cowards

T H E M!!!!!

GOD I LOVE MY CHILDREN STOP IM GONNA CRY MARKO WEARING THE MASK

THE MARKO CHANTS THANK YOU LORD

i have no more will to live now that marko ate the pin

STOP BEFORE I CRY FOR REAL

oH MY GOD LUCHASAURUS AAAA

luchasuarus said "back off my baby dinosaurs" and i respect that

hes obv still a little hurt tho you can see it in his movement

I STAN ONE DINOSAUR FAMILY

hmmm how come scu have to defend their championships every five minutes but chris jericho is always safe 🤔

gfys shawn spears

i'm a simple woman. i see shawn spears on my screen and I switch tabs

I constantly thank god for darby allin

Aubrey 😍😍😍😍

if darby loses i sue

JOEY!!!

uh. i mean. i mean. joey. big deal. who even cares about him and his braids and he smells anyway 😡

thank u darby i love you and definitely not joey...

DARBY AND JON WAIT STOP I CANT BREATHE OH MY GOD NO PLEASE THIS IS GONNA BE THE BEST THING IVE EVER SEEN SCREEEEEE

I'm literally screeching darby vs mox??? NAME A MORE ICONIC DUO

ya'll have a crowd full on transphobes huh

darby vs mox tho this is so goddamn exciting

SO excited oh my god who is nyla fighting !!

who??

people really are such big transphobes that they're cheering someone who hasn't had a match yet. i hate straighties

thank you queen I love you

get well soon dad i miss u :(

i feel like i should know her by sight but i don't

o i remember her. i like her merch

shes annoying

😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍

AWESOME KONG AND BRANDI MY SKIN IS CLEARING AS I SPEAK

perish, blonde woman

god i love this. i LOVE THIS

if mjf joins the inner circle i want it to be known right now at 5:56 pm that i will Still Stan. okay. i stood w baron corbin through it all. i'll stand by mjf through it all.

every time some one swears on aew and it's not chuck taylor i lose six months of my life

OH?!?!?!

HELLO MAX I LOVE YOU GOOD MORNING MY SWEET SCARF SON

he's handsome no one @ me ever again

i lov u asshole love you so much

LOVE YOUUUU

NO I LOVE YOU I'M NOT UPSET I LOVE YOU

expose him Max EXPOSE HIM

max 😍😍😍😍😍

I believe every word you've ever said ever

max is right stop SAYING MEAN THINGS TO HIM

THIS MAN IS HURT MAY I HUG HIM

max STOP I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU SO MUCH

AND WHAT A HANDSOME NEW FACE IT IS

YES YOU ARE BETTER THAN HIM AND I DO KNOW IT

wake up sheeple max is RIGHT

"my third or fourth installment" go off king.. go off......

sigh. I didnt want to do this. but i'm gonna have to stan.

or not?

MAX SAID A LITTLE BIT OF THE BUBBLY AND I IMMEDIATELY GOT UP TO GRAB THE CHAMPAGNE I SAVED FOR THIS EXACT SITUATION

ok thank god i dont have to stan the inner circle

thanks max i love you

HE IS HANDSOME ITS TRUE

ok... maybe that was funny. but I still love max

dont do this Max I dont want to stan

this is making me laugh hella hard dncnsndj

I LOVE THE HUG

cody man come on just let me have my max in peace

sigh

cmon Maxwell let's go

who?

wardlow I see

ok. I stan if he likes max

@ Maxwell Jacob Friedman choke me like that d*ddy

good morning it's been an hour and I've had four mikes and am on my fifth i'm drunk and in love with mjf

cowboy 😍😍😍😍😍

wait please don't let hangman lose I dont want to see him sad anymore

pac is fucking. more than human. I love him too

COW👏BOY👏SHIT👏

"i'm shocked by pac's leg strength" me 2 bud. those legs? i'm always shocked. hes so ripped his muscles have muscles

BASTARD SHIT LMFAOO HOW THE TURNS HABE TABLED

COWBOY STOP MAKING THESE NOISES I FEEL NSFWORK

yall are going to commercial in the middle of this match? disgostang. guess its valid bc this alcohol is going right thru me but. >:(

so Twitter says luchasaurus is actually Back back I'm really really happy abt that I missed dinosaur father

i finished going to the bathroom and sat down and it came back on clearly this is dirt rights

hangman and pac didnt get up for a second and I was Ben Affleck w cigarette. jpeg for a second thinking abt pac vs moxley

thank u for being a good bean mr ref bryce

:(((((((((((((((((((((

suing aew for emotional distress

JESUS matt Jackson

OH MY GOD AAAAAA ORANGE IVE NEVER LOVED A MAN MORE

literally I love orange cassidy more than i love myself

I'd be more exciting for this bucks/proud n powerful moment if orange cassidy wasn't on screen for two (2) seconds. His Impact

aew refs are my new mandatory kin

dont hurt Brandon Cutler hes a good boy

:(

thank god for private party

proud n powerful vs private party is dirt rights

me: :l

scu: SCUUUUU

me: :)

oh yeah btw my onion on scu officially changed i love them officially

SCU SAYS FUCK NASHVILLE BUT I LOVE WRESTLING FANS AND REALLY THATS CALIFORNIANS IN A NUTSHELL, I CAN CONFIRM, BEING CALIFORNIAN

i'm DRUNK thank god for autocorrect

why is sammy not vlogging. is he okay. does he have a fever

anyway if scu loses i'm suing again

jericho, a few weeks ago: WHO WEARS A SCARF

Jericho, today: wears a scarf tonight and talks abt scarfs today

judas FUCKS one of my fave songs of all time tbh

sammy guevara is like. 12. stop hip thrusting, child

kaz, my angel. I love you. so much

sammy: I GOT EM, DAD. I GOT EM

I love sammy BUT he better eat this pin so hard hes still tasting it next week

almost started filing my aew lawsuit when scorpio sky almost got pinned

I love how effective and strong the thesz press is. so wild. thank u mr sky

oh thank fuck. thank FUCK that pin wasn't complete

PLEASE MR SKY

THANK YOU MR SKY

SCU BEAT INNER CIRCLE SO NO ONE EVER TALK SHIT ABT CALIFORNIANS EVER AGAIN

unless ur californian. in which case ur allowed

scorpio sky being the first person in aew to pin Jericho is California Rights

that was a wonderful show. orange cassidy was there so it was 10/10. everyone say thank u aew

[starchildrenofdustand-ashes]

My Once on this Island Experience 2!!

I saw Once on This Island for my second time August 12th at 7:30 pm. There were a few casting differences: T. Oliver Reed was Agwe, Merle Dandrige was Papa Ge, Darlesia Cearcy was Erzulie, Loren Lott was Ti Moune, and Boise Holmes was TonTon!

🌴 So this time I was sitting in the second row of Papa Ge’s section (I got to step in the sand i died) the view was sooo incredibly different and I loved being so close.( Right next to me was where the actors kept their water so sometimes the run back and get a quick sip 😆) I think I enjoyed my seat more the first time. I’ll tak about why later on

🌴 So it was so cool bc I was so close to the front I got to talk to David Jennings and Cicily Daniels for a minute. I love the beginning of the show because you wouldn’t even know you’re about to see a show. It’s so natural.

🌴 Alex came out and immediately went to his little cooking station and started frying food. Idk what he was cooking but when he lifted the top off there was steam and it smelled REALLY GOOD. He talked to the audience in front of it. Behind him was the table with the table cloth on it.

🌴 Isaac comes out holding a ton of stuff and I could see all the muscles in is arm I was shook.

🌴 When papa Ge came out with the goat I died a little. She’s so HOT WTF. You could FEEL how pissed off she was. Because I was so close I could see Merle’s facial expressions and she didn’t give off the same cheerful positive vibes that the rest of them did.

🌴Honest to god I fricking love when there’s that giant crack of thunder. That marks the start of the show and the actors are no longer joking or talking with you and you realize how serious the situation is.

🌴 The actress who plays big Ti Moune (in this case Loren) also plays her mother at the beginning

🌴 This time I was close enough that I got to watch how they slowly transform into the gods. Agwes and Erzuled were the same but I noticed that Asaka is buttoning (?) the skirt to her shirt. And Papa Ge sliced her hand with a dagger and then swipes it on her face.

🌴 yes Isaac Powell is a GOD and THE BODY ROLL

🌴 I love Agwe so much he’s so amazing and arguably the most important god because none of this would have happened without his storm

🌴 I love the gods heard her prayer. The gods are so FUNNY even papa Ge lol.

🌴 The VOICE Asaka does when she says “the peasent girl wants ...”

🌴 When Asaka says a juicy mango, Agwe gets close to her and (kinda sexually) pinched her waist and she slaps him away with her fan.

🌴 when they said drop the mango, Alex bent so far back I thought he was gonna snap in half lol

🌴 t. Oliver reed was such an amazing Agwe wow. Like he reminds me of Q more then he reminds me of Norm. Norm was amazing (and probably my favorite) but he didn’t sound like the other two.

🌴 So from where I was sitting I was able to see Agwes entrance. It was very foggy and it looks like rapids. The water was moving intensely to imitate a storm.

🌴 from papa ges angle the car in rain was compleatly different. The back part of the car fell off first.

🌴 I inhaled so much fog during rain it was great lolol

🌴 at the beginning of pray Isaac was convulsing on the ground as Loren sung to him.

🌴 the peasants come up and make a circle around them and papa Ge is constantly lurking around it

🌴 I STILL don’t get the lighting for this part of the show. It’s so cool and sOmE SAy that it is supposed to represent the days going by but I didn’t really take away thay message. The lights are purple and red and those are the colors I associate with papa Ge, I assumed it was to represent the sadness and anxiety around the whole situation

🌴 When Julian arrives at the hotel beauxhomme the hold hold him at gunpoint

🌴 After Pray they say ‘Because of lack of sleep Her mind began wondering further from reality and into her dreams’

🌴 FOREVER YOURS. So I finally realized what happened. So during the insane lighting of Pray, Papa Ge and Daniel switch spots. When papa Ge leaves you can’t see her face so you wouldn’t know that it was actually Daniel. Since I was so close to the front I was able to see a teeny bit of isaacs Chest so I knew it was him 😆

🌴 he comes out from the other side to sing with Ti Moune but there’s still someone in her bed. When papa Ge starts singing she hops out of Daniels bed and he falls back down on it, unconscious.

🌴 the ensemble is sitting in a circle around them holding candles.

🌴 when Ti Moune trades her life papa Ge gestures to her almost like she’s pulling her life out and Ti Moune was gasping for air.

🌴I’m going to be compleatly honest with you. The sad tale of the beauxhommes is MUCH better for the other side of the stage. I was in agwes section at first so I could only see shadows. In papa ges section, you are on the same side as you are so you can see the shadows but you can also see the people making it and it’s nowhere near as cools.

🌴 When Armand curses his family , he goes to the other side of the sheet and papa Ge takes his place. So if your in agwes section you’ll be able to see papa Ges shadow

🌴 when the curtain falls, Daniel is on his knees in front of it. And the peasants/ beauxhommes pick up the sheet and they spit on him

🌴 Ti Moune is the saddest song ever

🌴 When Ti Moune says she wants to go and that Daniels heart beats for her Mama LAUGHED and her and was shaking her head in disbelief.

🌴 At the end of the song TonTon reaches out to Ti Moune but she doesn’t see it because had already run away :(

🌴 MAMA SAID SHE WAS GONNA PROVIDE AND SHE FUCKING DIDDDIDID

🌴 when Alex sings ‘WAaaOH” he screams into this poor (lucky) woman’s ear and she whipped her head so face lolol and when Loren walked by she patted the woman’s head apologetically

🌴 At the end of the song Alex grabbed Loren’s face and pulled it to her chest it was precious

🌴 Mama Will Provide (reprise) was so cuteee and it transitioned into some say as she was holding that super long note she ran off stage. For most of the time she wasn’t on stage for this song

🌴 When Ti Moune reaches the city there were a ton of city noises and the lights were so pretty

🌴 During Some Say they begin setting up Daniels room so like the crates became the post and legs for his bed

🌴 he comes down the stairs by erzulies side and he is on a crutch. Even though his leg is bandages you can see the red makeup around it making it look inflamed.

🌴 He goes to lie down on his bed and he leaps back because Ti Moune climbed through his window. He threatened to call the guards and Ti Moune was talking about how she healed him and bathed him and she prayed to the gods. And Daniel said “WHAT CAN YOU AND YOUR FAIRYTALES FIX THAT DOCTORS CANT, LITTLE GIRL”

🌴 Erzule appeared in the corner and it was like she was she put Daniel under a spell and he says “Alright you can stay. What harm could it to” and Darleisa starts singing and I died

🌴 I really REALLY loved Darlesias voice. Idk if I liked her more than Leas because it’s so hard to compare. Lea has a much lighter, saprano voice and Darlesia has more of a belty mixed type voice. It was beautiful whatever it was and it made me cry

🌴 once again; GLITTER FELL FROM THE CEILING as Daniel and Ti Moune made out. Daniel gently flipped her over and went down on top of her as the song ended

🌴 Gossip. So Daniel and Ti Moune were being really cute in bed and they were all around them.

🌴 He runs into Armand who looks like he came from the country club. He pointed his bad mitten racket at Daniel ask he sings.

🌴 Daniel goes straight from his father to look in the Mirror and that’s where he starts singing Some Girls.

🌴 From Papa Ges section isaacs back is facing you but you can see his face in the reflection of the mirror. he is closest to agwes section

🌴 There was a mirror on the other side of the stage (close to me in papa ges section.) and Andrea is looking through it. At some point isaac Walks over and looks in the same mirror but on the other side

🌴 when he sang “you face the world through a child wide eyes” Agwe had a light attached to the end of a fishing pole and Ti Moune Followed it like it was a firefly

🌴 At the end of the song they hug and Andrea is starring at them

🌴 At about this time, Agwe takes off his beard.

🌴 Chandeliers fall from the ceiling for the ball.

🌴 When they say “Dancing to their own little tune” during the The Ball, the servants said it with a giant smile and they turned around and rolled their eyes.

🌴 Daniel was dancing with Andrea and it was so fucking fucnny. Daniel was holding her as far away from him as he could and his smile looked like he wanted to die

🌴 Since I was so close, I was able to see how Ti Moune was walking when she came in. She was walking in the sides of her feet so the heels were pointing inwards.

🌴 Her Dance once again was the cute. She took of her shoes and I can’t even describe the dance it was beAUTIFUl. It’s so fun to watch all the servents join in and all the grandhommes freaked the fuck out. Armand was so mAD at Daniel and at first Daniel was kinda discouraged but then he took of his jacket and joined in. At the end of the dance they are all facing Andrea and bowing down to Andrea

🌴 Papa Ge was standing in a corner (close to me) and she was blowing out all the candles.

🌴 It was so heart breaking because Ti Moune was smiling so biG and Andrea told her she was going to marry Daniel her face just droPPED it was so sad.

🌴 i fucking love papa Ge. She’s such a badass. When she says “now your life is forever mine” she almost drags ti Moune over. It’s like she’s sucking the life out of her. Ti Moune is gasping for arm and she screams please don’t.

🌴 the ensemble is in a circle around them. They are moaning and crying. Erzulie and papa Ge are circling her when Ti Moune has a knife. She physically was struggling to put the knife anywhere near Daniel. When she dropped it he turned around and picked it up and he looked so hurt. She told him that she loved him and she tried to kiss him but he ran off stage.

🌴 Ti Moune is cast out of the hotel beauxhommes. The ensemble members moved the gates around to block Ti Moune. Basically they were throwing sand and spitting on her. Her dress became more and more ripped. Andrea and Daniel come through the isle on the right side of Agwes section. They opened the gates to let them through. They threw three coins lol. Ti Moune calls Danile and he looks so sad. I loved being so close because it helped me appreciate Daniels character a little more. I still don’t like him, but I was able to see the emotion painted on his face. He walked to Ti Moune and handed her a coin and Andrea calls him and he leaves, subtly wiping his face. Ti Moune looks at the coin. And drops it. And slowly lays down and died.

🌴 As if papa Ge realizes that she has been defeated, she breaks her stair with erzulie and runs of stage. I wasn’t sure but it looked like she was crying.

🌴 One of the servants starts singing a part of us and she slowly starts taking off the servents clothes. She reveals that’s she’s mama euralie. Next TonTon takes off his servants clothes and joins her.

🌴 Erzulie used her powers to stand Ti Moune up. Agwe grabs her hand and twirls her and she rests her back gently on his chest with her arms folded in front of her. He slowly sits her up and Papa Ge outstretched her arm and she walks into it and leads her to Asaka who gave her the biggest hug.

🌴 At this point Asaka no longer has on her head piece. Daniel has come back on stage as well, but he’s in his cargo shorts and t shirts.

🌴 Ti Moune exited through the water and there was a huge bright light and they were all facing her. This means that if your in Papa Ges section their back is to you. And since I’m short and was so close to the front, I couldn’t see her exiting.

🌴 Papa Ge And Erzulie come back and they are back in their outfits they had on in the beginning.

🌴 T. Oliver Reed and Isaac Powell lift the tree.

🌴 The end of Why We Tell the Story is Emerson standing in the middle of the circle and a fire is glowing like a campfire story.

🌴 Ti Moune comes back on (looking beautiful in her flowy long red dress. Her face is fixed up again and she has flowers in her hair) and climbs the tree and Mama takes her super long skirt and wraps it around the base of the tree.

🌴 There are red petals falling around the tree.

🌴 Ti Moune reaches her out to the little girl down below her and the little girl reaches up.

🌴 Ti Moune smiles down at her and there is only a spotlight on her face.

🌴 The spotlight fades out and that was the end 😭

It’s such a masterpiece! If you’ve seen the show or want to see the show feel free to reach out to me I fricking LOVE this show.

[dylanobrienisbatman]

100 Questions

it’s long so it’s under the cut, but man was this fun. thanks for the tag @the-most-beautiful-broom ♥ i’ll tag my loves (if you want to haha this is a lot) @raven-reyes-of-sunshine @perhalta @dracovengeance @hedaalicia and @amihanmayari

1. What is your nickname? Bails

2. How old are you? 24

3. What is your birth month? February

4. What is your zodiac sign? Aquarius!

5. What is your favorite color? green (Aw hey linds, same !!) 

6. What’s your lucky number? I was number 8 for marching band every single year (F8 for flute 8) except my junior year, and my junior year we had a shit show, so im calling that. 

7. Do you have any pets? 5 dogs back home in seattle but none where i live now or in NY when i get back

8. Where are you from? everywhere and nowhere. my dads military. but im american! 

9. How tall are you? 5’ 5″

10. What shoe size are you? 7

11. How many pairs of shoes do you own? A whole lot, but they’re not always all with me. 

12. Are you random? not really. im pretty set in my routines and very comfortably a home body

13. Last person you texted? my best friend @broadwaybound2016

14. Are you psychic in any way? not even a little tbh

15. Last TV show watched? The Bold Type (WATCH IT ITS AMAZING)

16. Favorite movie? I’m not really sure but i just watched Love, Simon and im literally just crying because of it right now so im gonna go with that until further notice

17. Favorite show from your childhood? probably Lizze McGuire

18. Do you want children? Nope

19. Do you want a church wedding? I dont really want to get married

20. What is your religion? agnostic? maybe? im not religious, and not very spiritual. I love spirituality, things like crystals and stuff, but i try not to appropriate those things from groups/cultures who actually use them. I’d love to learn more about them and be someone who actually knew how to practice but, again, i dont want to step on toes culturally and take things that aren’t mine to take

21. Have you ever been to the hospital? a lot! a ton of surgeries on my ears

22. Have you ever got in trouble with the law? nope, im literally a goody two shoes

23. How is life? lovely

24. Baths or showers? showers!

25. What color socks are you wearing? i dont really wear socks? i like those little half socks. I’m not wearing any rn

26. Have you ever been famous? nope.

27. Would you like to be a big celebrity? probably. i’d love to have a voice, and if it was for doing something i love, i cant think of anything better than getting to share my passion with the world like that. But it would definitely be a lot of pressure

28. What type of music do you like? i’m into literally anything. I love Hayley Kiyoko, the 1975, big fan of just basic pop like ariana grande and charlie puth, Harry Styles’s album is a masterpiece, Shawn Mendes, 5th Harmony. i love anything.

29. Have you ever been skinny dipping? Yes!!

30. How many pillows do you sleep with? just two!

31. What position do you usually sleep in? on my stomach

32. How big is your house? my house at home is a 5 bedroom 3 bath, my apt in amsterdam rn is just a room in a hotel type place with my own bathroom, and my apt in nyc is a studio

33. What do you typically have for breakfast? i literally hardly ever eat breakfast, but i love a bagel

34. Have you ever left the country? I’m in europe RIGHT NOW! lol

35. Have you ever tried archery? once, i was terrible

36. Do you like anyone? Not right now, but i might want too

37. Favorite swear word? i love the word fuck. it’s got so much you can do with it. i swear like a sailor.

38. When do you fall asleep? ummmmmm? whenever i guess lol 

39. Do you have any scars? A few small ones. a decent one on my knee from falling off my bike when i was 8

40. Sexual orientation? Bisexual

41. Are you a good liar? excellent

42. What languages would you like to learn? ALLLL the languages. I’d love to learn native hawai’ian. i spent my high school years there and the culture is so incredible, and i was so welcomed into it by my friends who were from there, i’d love a chance to really connect too it and try to learn that. 

43. Top 10 songs? Oh boy... im just gonna bullet these because i cant decide the order but this is the general

the way i am - charlie puth

young god - halsey 

rather be - clean bandit

feelings - hayley kiyoko

woman - harry styles 

make me feel - janelle monáe 

six inch heels - beyonce 

get right witcha - migos

my my my - troye sivan 

nice for what - drake 

44. Do you like your country? i’m torn at the moment. I hate tr*mp and everything him and his stand for, but i think america can be a wonderful place. 

45. Do you have friends from the web? Yes!! <3

46. What is your personality type? MBTI: INTP 

47. Hogwarts House? Ravenclaw

48. Can you curl your tongue? yes!

49. Pick one fictional character you can relate to? I am Hermione and Hermione is me. (also i really relate a lot to Lexa from the 100, which... is interesting. the way she suppresses feelings, her generally logical approach to things, the way she is totally useless around pretty girls.) 

50. Left or right handed? right!

51. Are you scared of spiders? If they’re like, big spiders yes. or if they come out of nowhere. im way more scared of cockroaches tho.

52. Favorite food? For some reason this question has been really hard for me lately? idk. i love a good indian style curry, and tacos? 

53. Favorite foreign food? Indian!

54. Are you a clean or messy person? I’m CLEAN, but im messy. i feel like cleanliness and orderliness have been misconstrued to mean the same thing, but clean is to dirty as orderly is to messy. I’m clean and messy, i am not very orderly, and i am NOT dirty. 

55. If you could switch your gender for a day, what would you do? Experience a walk down the street in a city at night where im not afraid

56. What color underwear? black

57. How long does it take for you to get ready? not too long, but it sometimes takes me a long ass time to pick an outfit 

58. Do you have much of an ego? It’s as big as it should be. 

59. Do you suck or bite lollipops? i suck on them until i can bite them

60. Do you talk to yourself? Constantly.

61. Do you sing to yourself? Hell yeah

62. Are you a good singer? i’m decent but i need another voice to match with. on my own i can’t carry a tune. 

63. Biggest Fears? failure. and heights. 

64. Are you a gossip? I can be, but never about like.. bad things. I like to talk about how this friend or that friend did x y z cool thing but im not like “omg did you hear so and so hooked up with so and so” 

65. Are you a grammar nazi? Not really because i can’t spell for shit

66. Do you have long or short hair? Short-ish? i cut my hair in march of LAST YEAR and then trimmed it again this year and i want it to fucking grow

67. Can you name all 50 states of America? i would definitely forget some

68. Favorite school subject? History

69. Extrovert or Introvert? Pretty introverted. 

70. Have you ever been scuba diving? Nah, im not allowed too for medical reasons

71. What makes you nervous? when I see kids wandering and their parents not noticing (okay im keeping that because me too, but also travelling? like the in-transit part of travel, catching busses/trains/planes makes me panic)

72. Are you scared of the dark? not at all

73. Do you correct people when they make mistakes? i try not too unless its major. usually its unintentional or the mistake is irrelevant to the flow of the conversation/situation  

74. Are you ticklish? Yes, but i hate being tickled unless its like, my sister or my dad

75. Have you ever started a rumor? No

76. Have you ever been out of your home country? Yes i have lol (linds, ily, we DEFINITELY have been over this already)

77. Have you ever drank underage? a little, but not until i was like 19, and then i was in europe for 6 months, so i didnt REALLY drink underage until i was like... less than 6 months to 21

78. Have you ever done drugs? Pot pretty regularly here in Amsterdam, and i’ve done shrooms

79. What do you fantasize about? getting a beautiful loft in a big city (preferrably london or NYC), with a kick ass job, a dog, and maybe a girlfriend with huge curly hair.

80. How many piercings do you have? Four

81. Can you roll your R’s? Yep!

82. How fast can you type? I just took a little online quiz that said i can type 72 words per minute with 93% accuracy? 

83. How fast can you run? lol I don’t run (same linds... same)

84. What color is your hair? brown!

85. What color are your eyes? Green!

86. What are you allergic to? I’m a bit lactose intolerant and pineapple makes my tongue itch?

87. Do you keep a journal? no, but i wish i did sometimes 

88. Are you depressed about anything? I’m not depressed “about anything”, im just generally someone who experiences a pretty mild case of depression.

89. Do you like your age? Yeah, i dig it.

90. What makes you angry? bigotry, ignorance, and spilling things. I spill drinks constantly, i spilled a WHOLE BOWL OF CEREAL ON MY FLOOR THE OTHER NIGHT.  

91. Do you like your own name? I didn’t used too but i really do now

92. Did you ever get a foreign object up your nose? not that i know of

93. Do you want a boy or a girl for a child? I don’t want kids. 

94. What talents do you have? i have a pretty great memory, but for random things i dont need 

95. Sun or moon? Moon <3

96. How did you get your name? My dad, he just liked it. My middle name was also my dad, he heard the name Jess on the movie A Man From Snowy River and he thought it was a nice like, nickname/pet name, so he gave me the middle name Ges (pronounced like Jess) with the intent of calling me that (it didnt stick), but he didn’t want anyone to think my middle name was Jessica, so he spelled it Ges.

97. Are you religious? I am not, but i have a lot of respect for the concept of religion, as long as its used for the real purpose, which is to make people feel peace and help people find love and comfort. 

98. Have you ever been to a therapist? I have not, but i shold

99. Color of your bedspread? White

100. Color of your room? White, with one black wall 

[geminimoonbeamx]

Naive: Part 2

A/N: I’m so freaking happy you guys seemed to like the intro, I wrote this and a few other chapters up in one night! Hopefully I can get you guys as hyped as I am for this story

Word Count: 2k+

Warnings: Just cursing in this chapter because I have the mouth of a sailor. The stirrings of sexual tension. The big stuffs coming next time though you guys I promise lol

Summary: As the goddaughter of Tony Stark you were no stranger to the Avengers, but when you meet the newest member- you’re a little more then intrigued. Unfortunately for him, Bucky Barnes has caught your eye. 💘💘💘💘💘💘

You’ve been at the tower for close to five-ish days now, and you’re still trying to get reaccoustomed to the enormity of the building.

Had it always been so fucking big?

You’d think since you we’re older now, it should have shrunk a bit. You know, size relativity and all that? If anything now that you we’re older you had the mental capacity to process just how freakishly huge this building was. The man tower is over sixty floors.

…that gave you a lot of opportunity to get totally lost. All the time.

You’d never had the greatest internal navigation system in the first place. You could get lost down the street from your house.

“I don’t know where I am! I’m between a Del Taco and a Walgreens”

You’d made many a lost phone call that sounded just like that.

You’d probably text Tony and ask him exactly what floor the main gym was on but 1) he’d tease you and ask “How exactly do you plan on playing Lara Croft all over the world and you cant find your way to the gym” and 2) it was three thirty in the morning.

You we’re irritated, being up this early when you didn’t have to. Especially when within the next few weeks you’d be starting adult life again and you’d have no choice but to wake up at the ass crack of dawn. It felt like a waste of precious sleep.

But no matter how hard you’d tried, it was no use. You’d smoked an entire joint of indica. Made chamomile tea- meditated until it felt like you we’re going to scream. Everything. And yet you couldn’t manage to get comfortable in the king sized, memory foam mattress.

Starting to come down off of the medication hadn’t been as awful as you and Tony had both been fearing. You we’re a little jittery- your anxiety acting up more then normal but you weren’t all strung the hell out and pale with sunken in eyes. You weren’t crying, hunched up in a corner begging for death or your next fix.

You we’re tired though. Exhausted and yet somehow couldn’t sleep. Your body just wouldn’t let you.

Why? Why lort? Sleeping was your favorite activity in the world. Dreaming an actual hobby of yours.

“This is bullshit” You complained to Tony a few days ago. You we’re going on 48 hours with close to no sleep. “I feel like I did like a kilo of Cocaine”

“I’m going to pretend you didn’t say that. You don’t know what cocaine feels like. That’s what I’m going to choose to believe” He had given you a pointed look when the both of you sat in his lab “Look kid, we knew there would be some side effects. It should ware off within the week, as your body gets used to this lower dosage. I can have the doc prescribe you some sleeping pills?”

You’d thought on it for a moment before denying it. You didn’t really wanting to be taking more meds right now.

“Alright, when you change your mind come find me” Tony had sighed. Your head was full of cement. Just like Jamie’s had been.

So since you didn’t take prescription- you figured you we’re going to have to find another way.

Your brilliant idea; run your body down until it had no choice but to crash.

It takes you another close to fifteen minutes before you find the main gym. It’s just a luxurious and lush as the rest of the building; three stories high. The top two floors looking over the large basket ball court. The equipment was state of the art and the various metal machines gleamed. You figured you’d do some cardio and then some weight lifting. Double whammy yourself.

People who have the pre conceived notion that fat people never work out are stupid. Point blank.

What, do they think people like you just sit on couches and stuff their mouths with twinkies while watching Rosanne…well that actually sounded like a good ass time but still.

You’d always been active, always loved going on hikes and exploring zoo’s and Museums and beaches for hours. Plus hadn’t anyone realized that shopping was the most hardcore cardio there was? And you lived to shop. After your mom- you’d needed to do something. To keep your mind clear and that is how your relationship with working out had come to be. You didn’t do it to lose weight, you did it to work on your health. Mental mostly, but your physical health came with that. Yeah you had a belly and thunder thighs. You also had kick ass blood pressure and strong calves.

You slip your headphones in after switching on your “Get it gurllll” playlist and hopping onto one of the elliptical machines, putting your water bottle in the holder before turning on the machine to pick your traction, starting at a decent pace.

The music shuffles from Amy Winehouse to J. Cole, to Lana Del Rey and Fleetwood Mac. Everyone had always teased you that you liked to work out to slow songs. It was something about the melody that got you moving. You go through song after song, keeping up your pace until your legs are screaming in protest and your breaths are labored.

With the blaring music in your ears, you don’t notice when someone else enters the room.

Bucky always came to workout early, usually getting the gym to himself. It’s not even that he liked the quiet or being alone or any of that- even though it was nice to not have Sam’s annoying, booming voice around. No, it was because he didn’t have anything else to do. When he woke up from the nightmares that still frequented him, he figured he should do something with all of that pent up energy, so he’d come to the empty gym and work his muscles until he could barley move.

He wasn’t used to the lights already being on when he got there.

He takes the steps to the cardio machine and stops in his tracks for a moment at the sight infront of him.

Y/N’s there, on an elliptical. He can hear the music in your ears from his spot across the floor, so he knew there was no way you could have heard him come in. Your working hard, your body straining in your skin tight leggings. Your silky ponytail bobs with your efforts, your breaths coming out in little pants. He can feel the look on his face. What were you doing here this early?

Should he leave? Was that weird, if he left after seeing that you was there? Surely this place was big enough for the two of you.

He thinks it’s probably smart to make his presence known, he’s just about to call for you when you stop and turn your head.

“OH HOLY FUCKING FUCK!” You cry in shock, your eyes wide with surprise as you yank the headphones from your ears before grabbing your chest, almost falling off the machine.

Bucky stands there, his own eyes big and his hands shooting up in a “sorry, I’m harmless” kind of way. A wordless surrender.

When your bell like laughter echo’s around him he relaxes a little bit “Bucky you scared the living crap out of me”

You accuse, good naturedly, still holding your hoodie clad chest.

“I’m sorry, It’s usually dead at this time so I kind of just barged in. I didn’t realize anyone is here” He explains himself. Leaving out the fact that he’d taken a moment to look at the way your thighs joggled in the spandex, of course.

You don’t know why you feel so…hot. Are your cheeks burning? No? It’s just your body reacting to the heart attack you’d almost just had.

“No, you’re good. Just give a girl a little warning next time, okay?” You chuckle as look down at the touch screen of the machine. You’d been on it for over an hour. You grab your water bottle and hop off. He hides his smile at how short your legs are.

“I’ll make sure to do that. So what are you doin’ up so early?” He hopes his attempt to make conversation didn’t sound as forced as it felt.

“I couldn’t sleep so I figured I might as well come try to run myself until I can knock out. You? I thought that you and Steve and Sam have some sort of fitness club?” You walk over to him, giving him a small smile before passing him on your way to the weights section. He shakes his head with a low chuckle and follows you,

Not because he was - like- following you. But because he was going to warm up with some lifting anyway.

You plop down on one of the leg lifts “You an insomniac like me?”

“Somethin’ like that. I woke up and couldn’t get back to sleep and figured somethin’ the same” Bucky goes over and lays out flat on one of the work benches, adjusting the weights.

“Hmm great minds think alike then” You croon. You hadn’t really gotten the chance to get to know him yet. Yeah, the two of you had talked in passing. At dinner. When you we’re messing with Steve. But never alone like this.

Damn. Did he look GOOD in those gray sweatpants.

“They do. How long have you been here” Bucky inquires as he grabs onto the weight bar and begins to lift. It’s nothing major. Not to him. Just three hundred pounds- on each side.

You watch him with wonder at the ease his arms move with.

You know its weird, but its hot seeing someone being able to bench that much with little effort…you wonder how easily he’d be able to bench you…

“Like an hour?” You answer him, tearing your eyes away from him.

Huh, he thinks. You’d been working out like that on the elliptical for an hour? You didn’t even look that winded.

“You work out a lot?” He feels like an idiot the moment it comes out of his mouth and your laughter doesn’t make it any better.

“What are you trying to say, huh?” You’re not mad, mostly just seizing the opportunity to tease him.

“Nothing! I just meant that you- uh- looked good up there. Like you don’t even look tired” He tries to unjumble his words, feeling like a total fucking bozo all the way.

“Yeah? Thanks. I spent the summer sight seeing in Europe which meant hiking like everywhere. I sweat I climbed like a gazillion steps. I guess it strengthened my core”

“Where in Europe did you go exactly?” He decides to go with a safer topic. Hoping he wont continue to make a total ass out of himself. He’d happened to have done his fair share of hiking that continent.

“All over but I mostly Italy. I spent a few weeks in Greece though, those we’re my favorite” You sound wistful. And that’s how it starts.

Bucky used to be able to spark up a conversation with just about anyone. Back before- back when he was younger, he could keep a conversation flowing like no one’s business. Steve had always idolized the way the people just seemed to like the guy. But it had been hard to get back to that now. Yeah, he wasn’t nearly as quiet as he’d been back in Romania, but he still didn’t talk. For hours. With near strangers.

Which is why he’s surprised he’s able to with you.

The conversation was bubbling, like a brook, ebbing and lively. He found himself wanting, almost needing to hear your little stories and opinions and jokes. You’d both abandoned working out and just sat on the machines, laughing and talking.

He learned that you liked to tease- a lot. Nearly everything was a joke with you. Your sense of humor sharp and sarcastic. Your nature playful and inviting.

You tell him stories from Europe and then about the tower and being here when you we’re younger with Tony. And in turn, surprisingly, he tells you a couple of his own stories back. A couple that he could actually remember. What it was like living in Romania- not knowing a lick of the language before hand. How fucking awkward he still felt as he adjusted to the 21st century.

“So lets get this straight, you’ve been de-iced for almost three years and you haven’t watched Harry Potter?” Your tone is dead serious and he grins and shakes his head.

“Nah”

“Or Lord of the Rings?”

“Negative”

“Or Star Wars?”

“Is that the one with the little green guy?”

“Yes!”

“I caught a little of it when Tony was watchin’ it”

“Oh my god, Bucky. I can’t. This is fucking blasphemous. I mean Lord of the Rings and Star Wars I guess could wait, I GUESS…But Harry Potter?! Harry Potter is the best thing this generation has to give! It will change your life!” The pure passion in your voice is almost palpable. Why cant he stop smiling?

“I guess I’ve been really missing out, haven’t I?”

“Yes! You have! Ugh, okay we’re going to have to have a movie night ASAP. It is just unacceptable for us to be living under the same roof and you haven’t seen a single Harry Potter movie” He thinks your kidding but your really not.

You don’t play about Potter, okay?!

When you check your phone and see the time your eyes bulge a little. You’d been sitting talking to him for nearly three hours.

“Oh shit, is it really almost seven?” You cant believe it. It really didn’t feel like you’d been here for that long.

“Is it?” Bucky sits up a little, not believing it either.

“Yeah” You bite you lip as you look at him for a moment, before standing “I should probably go and see if I can get any sleep at all”

He masks the small disappointment he feels at your words “Of course”

“It was really cool talking to you. I’m serious about our marathon! I have to school you on the most important stuff” You’re voice is flirty. As fuck. You don’t even know if you mean for it to be as you look down at him. He tries to tear his eyes from your face- and fails. Twice. Before he’s able to.

“Yeah uh, just tell me when”

“Definitely. Goodnight Bucky…or I guess Morning?” You giggle on your way out. He watches your retreating figure until your out of sight before he lets out huff and reclines hardly back. The machine sighs in protest. He fixes his eyes on the ceiling as he deals with the stirring in his head. The one though he can clearly decipher is…

Fuck.

Because although he’d liked having Tony not at his throat, he doesn’t see how he’s going to be able to stay away from you. No wonder Steve had gotten caught with his hands in the cookie jar.

—–

So I just had to pump out another part for you guys! I hope you like it! Tell me what you think? Do you like the dynamic between them yet? Does Y/N just seem like a little hoe? Do you want to be tagged. Tell me ya'lllllllllll.

@devenrenee @skeletoresinthebasement @kendallefire @mellifluousbabe @toniinhere @agentmstark @purplekitten30 @bellaballanda @yslbucky @arabellaaurorabarnes @prinxessofspace @supernaturally-lucky @sngforme @kyritha

[glumvillain]

GlumReviews #1

     Todays first “Old New Album” is from Mississippi-born singer, guitarist and harmonica player, Howlin Wolf. With a unique and sometimes haunting vocal style, Howlin Wolf could be considered a progenitor of the screamo grunge era of the early 90s.  This man didn’t come to croon a tune into your ear about a love lost--no. He came to play some damn blues and howl into the night. On my first ever listen thru I was transported to an era of smoky blues clubs and sweltering afternoons sitting on the porch, waiting for a pissed off lover to come back home.

     And if you’re asking yourself if this is my first time doing this, then that answer is yes, so bear with me, as we dive into Howlin Wolf’s first compilation album titled “Moanin’ in the Moonlight” a collection of a decade’s work (1951-1959), and a perfect first album for nascent Blues fans who would like a nice jumping off point to blues appreciation.

We begin with Track 1:

     1.Moanin at Midnight

We enter with the trademark “howls” as harmonica and guitar pickin’ chug us along into an upbeat little jam about nothing in particular, to an amateur such as myself this song appears to me as just a nice little jam to showcase what you’re in for with the rest of the album, I’ll refrain from calling this one of the weaker songs on the album, it does have the toe tapping jaunt of a good blues track, and its only the beginning of a journey into the life of a bluesman beginning his rise to blues stardom in Chicago.

       2. How Many More Years

Proto-rock at its finest, with crunchy guitar pickin’, and rolling blues piano, by the time HW croaks in his throaty vocals with “How many more years have I got to let you dog me around/ I’d soon rather be sleeping six feet in the ground”, you know this is what you came to listen to, real blues, a story about a man being treated wrongly by his lover. Shame. When you know you’re not being given the best you can get, having no choice but to retire to separate quarters of the house to salvage peace. Oh and if anybody asks about Ol’ Howlin’ Wolf, just tell ‘em he walked out on ya

          3. Smokestack Lightnin’

This is it. Not gonna bury the lead here, this is why you put on this album, if there was ever any song that made a statement about why the singer is named “Howlin’ Wolf” this is it, a 3 minute blistering ballad of a man wailing his soul out. “Why don’t you hear me cry” he wails into the night, as harmonicas pickup the groove, you cant help but dance a little while this guy is just...being emo essentially, but its GOOD emo music. And all respect to where its due, this is just good fucking music, and it only exists to amplify emotion. All captured in this track here, the heartbreaks and ordeals of another lost lover. Don’t skip this track.

     4. Baby How Long

Winding down into some fine driving music if I say so myself, leaving the emo trail behind a bit, a nice upbeat tune about waiting. Awakened to his lover having just left him, Ol’ Howler only does his best work on days like this, another vocal delight on the album and his harmonica work is not to be underestimated either, both skills on beautiful display as he wails “Well when you leave home/ You can call me on your phone”. 

     5. No Place to Go (You Gonna Wreck My Life)

Leaning a little more RnB here, Howlin’ Wolf begins with a clean vocal that gives way to his croaks, and I gotta say I’m reminded of the clean/heavy switch off with grunge bands and later emo screamo bands, just in a blues format. Very chill song about the inner thoughts of another down and out day, lamenting the time spent with someone whose now a stranger to you. Possibly how one has wasted their best years with someone “Now I’m old and gray, got no place to go”, this is a leaving song, this is when he packed his bags, headed into a great unknown.     

     6. All Night Boogie (All Night Long)

Ok put out your cigarettes and get on the dancefloor, you could call this the song he played after Track 5′s scenario at his local venue, while an upbeat danceable tune we stay on the topic of scorned lovers. Just another worrisome bluesman wondering where his woman is all hours of the night, but instead of wailing his heart out on this one, we get some great harmonica work, if you like harmonica, this is the jam for you, sometimes the ol’ mouth harp can convey emotions better than “I cried, I cried, I cried, all day long”

      7. Evil (Is Goin On)

Another benchmark in the album as we get deeper into these soulful RnB sounds, a little ballad about a man who likes to visit your woman when you’re away from home. Bass led and vocal heavy, this is just another notch in HW’s belt for his many styles, if you started from track 1, you could essentially call that bare bones as we progress thru the compilation (spanning 10 years as mentioned before), you can really chart progress of an artist and recording quality, another track you shouldn’t skip. A highlight of this track is definitely that ragtime piano.

          8. I’m Leavin’ You

Bet you can’t guess what this songs about. Well if you can’t then it’s just another day in the life of Howlin’ Wolf as he explains to his woman that one day will be the day he finally packs it up. “meanest woman I ever seen/ No matter how I try to treat you right/ Still you’s a mean little thing” he sings to a rambling blues chord progression-- which it’s worth noting that HW has penned several blues standards and if you’re interested in the history I advise you to check out the wikipedia article. Nothing relatively noteworthy in this track but it keeps the album energy at a moderate pace and never once are you taken out of that momentum once it starts.

          9. Moanin’ for my Baby

Step back into that swelterin’ blues bar with me for a sec because we got more Howlin’ to do. The soulful blues tracks give way to the OG sound of the first few tracks that started the compilation, a repetitive toe tappin blues jam session. I sense gospel singing that slowly gets bent into blues. The light giving way to dark, pure rivers running into muddy water swamps. Ramblin’ man blues, that damn Howl is just poetry, an instrument unto itself, apart from the singing, apart from his guitar work, and apart from his harmonica, his voice becomes the perfect tool to not only sing but to emote the blues in dissonant wails and vibratos.

     10. I Asked Her For Water

“I asked her for water/ She brought me gasoline“

--ok come on wouldn’t that lyric fit just as well before the breakdown drops from any number of your favorite Emo era bands? 

nearing the end of this journey, we find that the theme visited heavily in this album is the theme of home and homelessness, he has no sense of home and anywhere he has found a home...isn’t a big fan of his presence. His lady is gone all night when he’s home, wants him gone when she’s home, and whenever he’s gone from home, she’s worried about what he’s up to, and vice versa. NOT to mention, that whenever he’s gone from home, apparently there’s some guy waiting for men to leave their women alone so he can entertain them. What a fucking world. 

     11. Forty Four

I get a real gospel/pop vibe from this, mixed with a little marching band. The scenario set is a pretty neat little story about once again, being away from home, the pawning of possessions and a need for a direction to travel to. I wanna be vocal and say that if I truly believed a song was worth skipping I would say it, and so far no track has lost my interest, with an average song time of about 3 minutes each track this is a nice slice of blues, each with a different bend to the sound, nothing is duplicated in this journey, the theme is essential and it really does set up that perfect bluesman story, minus the crossroads.

     12. Somebody In My Home

We made it. You made it. And for that, I thank you.

wrapping up this first of what I hope is many reviews to come is this sludgy blues ditty and while it appears as just another run-of-the-mill blues song -- This is what I’ll have to say is his most lyrically strong song in this entire album “Colors dont bind, oh no/ What do they know? They speak falsely”

It feels as if this is him personally sitting down in a chair across from you and just cutting straight to the chase about life, like if he had to boil everything down into one nugget of wisdom to impart, then this would be it. A personal chat from a man who was born in 1910. A slice of history told thru music.

In Conclusion:

“Moanin’ in the Moonlight”, clocking in at around 30 minutes, an easy choice to make if you’re looking for a nice introduction into blues, and I’ve said it before but a large takeaway from this album is SEVERAL styles of blues being presented here and none of it gets repetitive, I am sure guitar beginners could become some decent blues pickers studying the techniques on display here as well.

rating system [subject to change]

1-bad

5-good

The rating system for now is kinda arbitrary as there is nothing to base it off of until I’ve made other reviews to weight it against, but based purely on the album runtime and the contents of the album I’ll give it:

⭐⭐⭐⭐/5

I was gonna go with 3, but with the help of Spotify (not an ad), it led me down the rabbit hole of some great blues guitarists as well. Gave it a little bump for being a beginners blues album.

[strawberryspeachy]

K. I know alt stands for ASSITANT language teacher

But 2 things. 1) assitants fucking DO THINGS

2) the way they sell this job is like youre a teacher.

Constantly in this job i am treated like a clown.

And im gonna tag this and im probably gonna receive the same comments i get irl from rose tinted glassed ‘japanese people can do no wrong’ people

Thus far ive worked in 4 junior highs and 3 elementarys

Most of the teachers no matter where they are just seem so incompetent

Its no big deal that the teachers arent fluent in english - isnt that literally why alts are here??? So why don’t they ever take advice?!???

Im so fucking sick of being told how to speak my fucking language.

And not the ‘speak slower’ ‘speak simpler’ thats fine and ill accept criticism on my ability to communicate to people learning english as a second language. Not that.

Grammar, pronunciation, sentence structure - and what sounds natural

I hate the videos that are made for classrooms. And the fucking books

“A native speaker wrote it” - k no. Having worked here i know exactly how that went down. A japanese person wrote it, then went to either a business kiss ass ‘japan can do no wrong’ person. Or. Bullied someone into saying it was good by doing that annoying ass thing japanese people do

Where they ask the question over and over with “ok?” At the end. Cause they dont want an answer - they just wanna be told that theyre right or to do whatever they want. And they do not plan on receiving any answer besides “youre correct”

Its awkward cause ive literally been annoyed at my friend in the past for complaining about having a job where she does nothing and gets paid. Now i feel bad because i HATE going to work to sit and do nothing. But honestly - it has more to do with the fact that of all of my schools - only 1 has given me a nice place to sit.

Not a table that they store junk on and pretend to be surprised by me everytime im there like “oops sorry theres all this stuff (but like youre not a real person and we hate that youre here so just be happy we tolerate your existance and tell is your happy to have giant things all over your desk literally sticking in your face)”

Not the extra desk behind the printer that blows dust in my face as it goes off every 20 seconds

Not the desk under the aircon blowing on me/ in the corner next to the coldest window/door

Not a literal broken chair

Not a desk in the path of the class files where teachers have to constantly get to the spot directly behind me

And i was also that person thatd say ‘well if you dont like it - quit - theres plenty of people who WANT that job’

But like it fucking sucks. Cause i have experienced REALLY good teachers who actually team teach with you. I have had one school where i worked full time and got to see my students more than once a month - hence being able to actually get to know them and want them get better. I have been at a school with wonderful staff who welcome me into the school like im an actual person - not like ‘oh is today already the day we let the rat in the school to make the children smile again. Ugh.’

It fucking sucks. I linger on the hope of being able to work at a good school with good teachers full time

I cant find a better job because im a ‘beginner’ and corona

And im stuck getting treated like shit

I AM NOT a kiss ass. Never have been. It kills me to have to work with people who dont want me around

Most of the teachers i work with ARE NEVER PREPARED like wtf why??? Why dont you EVER plan ahead??? When im not prepared its because i have to wait to get instruction from you - you get to chose what you do

And they do basically nothing (not all like ive said ive worked with good teachers)

But most just

Read the book OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AGAIN. The students memorize the book passages - they have no clue about the context and if you ask them the same exact question but with a different subject like “do you have any shoes” instead of “do you have any bags” theyre lost. The teacher can get them to answer by saying the exact phrase from the book - but they dont know what theyre saying or how theyre actually answering. They just have it memorized

Then some teachers will have “conversation practice” where they take those exact sentences out if the book - put them together to form an awkward ‘conversation’ and then the students just read it.

Ooohhh look at them. Having a conversation!

Play fucking bingo.... why? They dont even make the students repeat the words for pronunciation practice - why the fuck do you play bingo everyday

Sing songs. UGHHHHH yea that could be fun if these 60 year old teachers would stop forcing shit from the 1940s on the teenage students. I cant decide if music too old for 30 year olds is worse or teachers who take japanese songs that have been translated into english is - lol you fucking hate english so much you cant find ONE english song to sing??? WHY are you teaching english?! - god forbid you let the students choose

Teachers who just give the students the day date and weather....??????????? Cool. Youve managed to ensure they cant come up with the simplest of fucking English questions on their own. Do you carry around those cards to look like you do a lot at your job when you dont? Oh yea probably

Because being in a school watching teachers is the way i learned that japan values looking busy over being productive. If you look stressed and busy all day - you are better than a person who got shit done but looked relaxed.

Why do you use the recordings when i am in the class?????????????????????????????????? THATS LITERALLY THE ONLY REASON YOU APPARENTLY HAVE ME THERE

K and like i said. I have worked with good teachers. In their classes the students are better at english (hur hur funny how that works) those teachers encourage the students to talk with me. Those teachers let the students try to come up with answers and questions on their own. Those students try and ask the teacher when they dont know how to say something to help with translation.

The shit teachers on the other hand - will jump in and stop a student who looks excited to try and trying to figure out how to say something. What does this teach them? Dont try. Just stay silent - the japanese teacher will just talk in japanese again soon - no need to try.

Jumping off that. Students who are good at english or go to juku - will dumb themselves down in classes with shitty teachers. Theyve learned its not good to know more or even nearly as much english as the teacher - pretend you dont understand. Pretends you don’t know how to say things - itll make my stupid teacher feel good. So. If i try to talk or do anything in those classes, even the students who understand will stop trying.

Speaking of just going back to japanese. WHY IS MOST OF ENGLISH CLASS IN JAPNESE???? Most of the teahers will jump at ANY chance to switch back over into japanese. English is just sprinkled into the class. Then they pretend to wonder why the students dont try and why theyre bad at english

And things ive been told in the last year

Dont ever be upset about anything ever

Lol yea just that for one

K but dont ever be upset about teachers doing ANYTHING because theyre just so GOSH DARN BUSYYYYYYYYY

Lol like intially i thought that was why ASSISTANT was in my title. I THOUGHT we were supposed to make them less busy by helping out with planning and grading and blah blah

Nope cause

‘Oh offer to help them! BUT dont be upset when they decline because theyd have to explain to you ANYTHING and.....’

So. Im a child?! I cant be trusted to do anything without proper instruction

Well yea exactly cause

“Oh! Hes probably your babysister haha! Japanese people are so nice! They usually have one teacher look out for you and help you with stuff - besides the head teacher- lol theyre kinda like your babysitter!<3”

K. So like. I need a bachelors degree for this job. Let me say again I NEEDED A COLLEGE DEGREE FOR THIS JOB. i had to move ACCROSS THE WORLD by myself. I have to ge able to fill out federal documents and find a house and pay my bills and follow foregn laws and figure out my way in a foregn country - but i need a BABYSITTER at work?!?!?!?? If im a minute late ill be docked an hours pay. If i do ANYTHING that slightly upsets ANYONE and japanese ppl are offended by EVERYTHING - i am liable for all reprucussions. But. I need a BABYSITTER.

Cant be trusted to be in a class alone (dont be offended its because your not a certified teacher) that would make sense except that YALL THROW ALTS IN WITH THE SPECIAL NEEDS STUDENTS ALL THE TIME - thats supposed to be an EXTRA certification on top of teaching. but Im too fucking stupid and untrustable to do anything with regular students alone, but because you dont like dealing with spefial needs - i can teach them alone.

You dont actually read their hw or check for correctness and most of their tests are just for fun it seems - but i cant be trusted to grade those either

You do the exact same lesson everyday and i only see each class once a month - but dont let me create any activity or lesson for them. Also dont tell me your plans until class is starting and then change it throughout the class and act surprised when idk what the fuck youre doing because you changed your mind while talking at them in japanese

Speaking of changing. I hate teachers who constantly change how they do shit. And again. Get annoyed at me when i cant follow their flow. Do i say hello first or do you? Are we even saying hello today? Am i asking how they are or are you? Are we letting them answer? Are we answering? Whose asking the day date and weather? Are we asking them for the day date and weather?? Whose saying goodbye? Are we saying goodbye? Which bingo version have you chosen today? Are they repeating the words? Yes? No? Am i saying each one twice? Do i have to spell out the fucking word today? Fast? Slow? What hell are you putting me through today

And when they ask me to take charge of an activity. But then change their mind. But then no no you go ahead please take charge. K no just kidding ill tell you and them what to do. Actually no you can keep going please be in control. K no too much english i wanna hear more japanese ill be in control - hey everyone thank the alt for doing that activity with you (me and the students look at each other visibly confused)

These teachers will ask me a question and no matter how i answer its wrong. I always answer shortly initially because... of course. But theyll tell me to GO ON!!! theyll keep doing that. So ill start answering questions with substance - then theyll cut me off - so i go back to answering shortly but NO! CONTINUE!!! im constantly caught confused exactly what they want me to say and now i barely ever tell stories to the students. I stare at the jte the whole time trying to guage by their face if i should keep talking or make it short. Its also awkward cause sometimes they jump in to translate and other times they want me to just keep talking in english with no translation. Regardless whatever way i choose is never correct and they always look at me like im an idiot

Yesterday a teacher did one of the things inhate that prompted this I WANNA WRITE ABOUT HOW MUCH I HATE THIS JOB

Hes a sub. Hes supposed to do the same lessson as the other teachers. He is NEVER prepared. And he does everything bad. So when he didnt have the stuff for the activity he said he wants the students to have conversations with me. GREAT! thats what im here for! Lets do it. So then he shows them videos he has of other students talking with an alt at another school for 5 minutes. Um.... k. Then we open the book to a page of 3 example convo starters. Except. Japanese teachers dont seem to understand that the book is meant to be EXAMPLES. he says ah like this but maybe change. Good ok! I think were on the right track. Lets read these examples and get to it. Nope. He has them have the example sentences with their partner saying its good practice.

No. Its not. Theyre just reading the book and then when they finish saying

“Do you know any good restaurants around here?”

“Yes i do! Theres a curry place over there”

“oh i love curry!”

Theyre not gonna make up more at the ......

Theyre just gonna talk in japanese about other shit.

Then he says ok lets have conversations. Finally

Nope.

He has the class repeat after him together as a unit to me “do you know any good restaurants around here?”

GFFEIWBAKDHWNDGDIEBS RAGEEEE

I said ive had convos in class before may i try like before

He feigns confusion

I ask a student “what kind of food do you like?”

She says sushi

“What kind of sushi”

The students in this class were excitable and chimed in each time.

This time (as usual because they dont know the fish names in english) She begins talking with the kids around her trying to figure out what the english word is for the sushi she likes

But the teacher jumps in and shuts it all down

Because the students are just way too shy to talk in front of the class. Their english is too bad. They cant.

Its extra aggrivating because the teachers at this school range from good to decent - except him. That was a second year class. The last time i was at this school the first years had a introduction 1 on 1 test - with me. And i was to ask them a question at the end. With the other 3 teachers when i asked the question if they didnt understand. I would try saying it in another way. If they still didnt understand - i would answer my question as an example. If they still didnt understand i would give them answers like

“What tv do you like” “do you like anime?” Wait for yes or no “do you like youtube” wait for yes or no (and so on)

If they still didnt understand (very few got here) the japnese teacher would translate the question)

And. If they still didnt understand. We would give them an answer and coax them into repeating after us.

If they didnt. Then they didnt get the point for answering the question.

This teacher. Him being the 4th teacher to do this test with me. Would IMMEDIATELY translate the question if the student didnt answer quickly after me asking it once and then talk to them in japanese and tell me their answer or make one up to me with something like “oh ahah they dont know when yet. So he doesnt know. Maybe he ate breakfast before school!” And then would shoo the student away and call in the next.

^^^ and this is how most teachers are

They sit during class. They play unrelated videos. They spend half the class acting like theyre too confused about their plan to even teach the class (but if i try to do ANYTHING like talk to a student while they sit in front of the class rummaging through their folder going “うーん」 「じゃ」「じゃあー」「そして」「それから」「えーとー」 theyll instruct SOMETHING or play some recording over and over) have i mentioned how they never seem to want to talk in english or listen to students talk in english in english class?? Most of the time theyre just having aside conversations about nonsense in japanese. They read everything themselves despite me being there - in a way where they really just wannt hear themselves talk in english.

Just in general. I hate when teachers talk about me in front of me and dont tell me what the fuck theyre saying. And it’s annoying when students ask them stuff in japanese about me and then the students look at me waiting for me to respond/the teacher to translate their question- but the jte doesnt translate. Or they ask a question that im not in charge of the answer for so even though i understood the question they asked the jte i cant answer them because its not my decision and the jte doesnt wanna look like the asshole that gives them an answer they dont like so they just dont respond so that i look like the dick whose ignoring the students

They do this with regular questions too. Sometimes i hear the whole question and understand. So when the students look to me and the jte goes silent - i answer - then the jte gets all out of sorts because 1) they wanted me to look like an asshole who doesnt wanna talk to the students 2) they deemed the questions not important and didnt want it answered 3)ew! The alt knows more japanese than i thought and she knows what im doing and thats a little embarrassing also what else have i said in front of her today that she might have understand - awkward 4) oh no if students know she understands some japanese they might ask her stuff and i wont be the only means of the alt and students communicating 5) that awk silence just showed the students that i didnt plan to translate something to her and i wanted to blame her and say she doesnt wanna answer that but now i was made a liar of

These arent personal queations btw. For example a student asked why does the guy in one peice eat a lollypop in the america version instead of smoke a cigarette?

This is an incomplete liste. Just. Honestly being an ALT is draining.

I feel like im at a restaurant again just waisting my life away waiting tables.

I actually really like english so being forced to listen to people who are supposed to teach it - purposely teach it wrong and force me to use it incorrectly hurts

I hate watching people suck at their jobs....and be rewarded for sucking at their job

I hate feeling like an outsider in my workplace.

I wanna feel like a real teacher.... not a clown

I hate doing something where nothing i say, do, or feel matters.

That last one. I hate that i can be treated like shit in my workplace AND get in trouble for not thanking people FOR treating me like shit. Not just take it. Take it with a smile!!!

I try to focus on the good things... but its just so damn hard cause ther far and few between and honestly i just wanna feel like im actually an educator to my students and like i can actually be a teacher with the ones who like me and come talk to me and stuff. But its not like i have have a teacher student relationship with them - i cant be part of their school activities. I cant go to their school events. I wont be at the school with them for more than a year.

Even at good schools when the teachers like that you talk with the students - i always feel this vibe of ‘keep it superficial’ dont become an adult they would trust. Its like you can feel them watching - ready to jump in when they think the student should stop petting the stray before they get fleas

I have a lot of teachers i remember fondly. Who id talk to when i saw them even when i didnt have their class anymore. Id tell kids in grades below me that they were lucky if they got them. When i hear about things happening at the school after i leave im happy to hear they got something good. Teachers who helped me understand something better or were just nice to the obvious loser in the class or made me laugh

I wanna be one of them....

Not the police man that came into school a couple times. Or the guy with the birds. Or the nice lunch lady who let you take food when you didnt have money and pay it back the next day.

I wanna be a teacher with a name.

Or at least. Do one of the only things im actually good at

So this job is unfulfilling

[hanasaku-shijin]

It has come... the LWA finale....

guys i dont want it to end im

IF I NEVER EATCH THE FINALE LWA IS TECHNICALLY NEVER OVER FOR ME WHAT IF I JUST

NEVER WATCH THE FINALE UNTIL IM ON MY DEATHBED

i saw before but i’ll say it again NO THEMSE SONG IN THE BEGINNING CAN ONLY MEAN ONE THING

IT’S

COMING IN THE END

BUT WHICH SONG

CUZ MIND CONDUCTOR WOULD BE RAD BUT BOOOII

IF IT’S SHINY RAY, THE SONG THAT STARTED US OFF 5 MONTHS AGO

IM GONNA BREAK DOWN

who am i kidding im gonna cry anyway

HERE WE GO HHEEEERE WE FUCKING GOOOOO

old men ew bye

bruh

BRUH IM GOING BACK TO WHAT I SAID ABOUT THE HATRED NEEDING TO BE OVERPOWERED BY LOVE/HAPPINESS

BOOOOOII I SWEAR TO GOD

JASNA

PLEASE

OHHH CANT CATCH IN ON YOUR BROOMS MAYBE BUT I FUCKING

HAVE AN IDEA OF WHAT BROOM CAN REACH IT AND OH MY FUKCING GOD PLEEEEEAAAASSEEE

THAT WOULD BE

THE ULTIMATE BEST THING

UM HI DIANA WAS THE FIRST PERSON SO VOICE SUPPORT FOR AKKO INSTEAD OF DOUBT

EXCUUUUUSE ME IM FUCKING EMO

UM

UUUHHHMMM

OOHHHH

 MY GOD

AKKO AND DIANA

ARE GONNA

RIDE

SHINEY VOLLEY

A G A I N

OH MY FUCKING LORD IN HEAVEN IM

GONNA STROKE IM HAVING AN ACTUAL STR O KE

WE GET IT

A SECOND TIME IM

HOOOO MY GODDDDDDDDD

OOOHH MY HODDDODD

ALSO THE WAY AKKO SAYS EVERYONE’S NAMES BUT!! DIANA’S!! SHE SAYS WITH SUCH RELIEF!!! BITCH IM FUCKING CRYING

THIS IS

REALLY HAPPENING

IM GONNA

CHAROIX SHOULDER TOUCH

//HUFFS IM

FUCK

LORD

THAT SHOT OF THEM ALL CONSTRUCTING THE GIANT BROOM

AKKO AND DIANA TALKING TOGETHER WITH ONLY EACH OTHER

CROIX AND CONSTANZE BEING TECH TOGETHER

O H  

 MY  G

FCK GUC

OH MY GOD

THE

THE W HITE

ROBE S

THE CHARIOT HATS

THE 

THEEHE HT OUTFITS IM

IIMMM

OHH MY HOFD DOD OHOG DKOHNG  FB SKBFKDHB KVLRIGZGSK.SFBJD

IM SERIOUSLY ABOUT TO CRY

THIS VERYS ECOND

OH MY GODD LOOK AT THEM!!!!

MY GIRLS!!!!

IM GONNA

I NEED A MINUTE IM FUCK

OH NOOO

I CANT DO THIS YOU GUYS I CANT

OH 

MY GOD

LOOK AT THEM

ALL CHANTING TOGETHER

DIANA AT THE HEAD OF THE PACK

NO WONDER SHE FLEW SO DETERMINEDLY IN THE OPENING THEME SONG ALL THIS TIME

LOOK AT THEM GOOOOOO

I AM THE

MOST

SHOOK

EVER IM

IM FUCKING

HOLY SHIT

CROIX TELLING IT LIKE IT IS

FAILURES AS TEACHERS LMAO U BET BUT DONT DOUBT THEM DAMMIT

A BELIEVING HEART IS YOUR MAGIC CROIX COME ON SAY IT CHARIOT SAYY IIITT 

SOMEONE’D BETTER SAY IT

OH YM GOD

LOTTE USED A FAERY!!! FINALLY!!

JASNA THE ANCHOR THE BOOST

THEY JUST GONNA FALL OFF LIKE ROCKET BOOSTERS

PUSHING EACH OTHER UP HIGHER

OH FUCKING SHIT

THIS MEANS SUCYS GONNA PAT LOTTE IM

NOT READY

FOR THIS

ALL OF THIS

SHE OPENED HER EYES

FUCK

THEY ALL HAVE THEIR OWN WAYS OF HELPING TO BOOST THE OTHERS

pff that random lady in the crowd was Hannah’s va just sayin

okay bet andrew is helping somehow yes wonderful ANYWAY

BACK TO MY GIRLS PLS

old men GO AWAAYYY

AAHHHH

AAHHHH

LOTTE AND SUCY

COMBO

AND DID THE THING

AND HEY LOOK NOW THE BOYS ARE LIKE ‘WITCHES ARE COOL’

ahem akko just a suggestion but

instead of holding onto the broom handle why not

hold onto diana 

good god UM THE AIR PRESSURE ARE THEY OKAY CAN THEY BREATHE???

just wondering

THIS IS ONLY 10 MINUTES IN UM IM DYING IT’S TAKEN ME 20 TO GET THIS FAR

JESUS

AKKO AND DIANA NEARLY GOT HIT BY OTHER MISSILES AND DIED TOGETHER 

LORD IN HEAVEN

GOD CAN WE STOP

SWITCHING BETWEEN DIANAKKO AND OTHER THINGS JUST KEEP US ON THEM PLEEEEASE

FOR LONGER THAN 2 SECONDS

okay everyone is giving them energy to go on neat

LOL FUCKING

CHARIOT AND CROIX JUST WATCHING A MOVIE OF THEIR DAUGHTERS POTENTIALLY ABOUT TO DIE

HVAING A GAY OL TIME TOGETHER

WATCHING A FUCKNG MOVIE 

MOVIE DATE IM FUCKING LOSING MY MIND

CROIX IS STREAMING THEM

AND SHE’S!!

LETTING CHARIOT ANNOUNCE!!!

LIKE THE PERFORMER SHE ONCE WAS

LIKE SHE HAS IN ALL THE OVAS DURING EMERGENCIES

SHE GETS TO DO IT AGAIN

BIIITTCCCHH

ALL THESE ELEMENTS COMING TOGETHER

OH MY GOSH STOP WITH THE OLD MEN GETTING IN THE MIDDLE FO FUCKING EEVRYTHTINNGG

I KNOW WE GOTTA MAKE THEM BELIEVE IN THE WITCHES BUT

CAN WE PLEASE JUST

FUCKING

PRIME MINISTER IS FUCKING MVP

OH MY GODDDDD

DIANA

JUMPS DOWN

AND 

PUSHES HER ONWARD

OH MY GOD

IM FUCKING

YOU GU Y  S

 YOU  GU Y S  

HELP ME

SHE MADE THEM INTO LITTLE DREAMS!!!

I M

SO FUCKING SHOOK

DIANA’S FUCKING KEEPING WATCH

WARNS AKKO WHENN TO HANG ON

KEEPING AN EYE OUT FOR HER 

GOD

GODDDDDDD

OH YM HGOD

DIANA IS FUCKING 

FLYING THIS FROM THE BACK HOW EVEN

HOOWWWWW

CAN SHE MANEUVER

I MEAN SHE’S DIANA FUCKING CAVENDISH BUT GOD

AKKOOOOO

AKKO GET BACK ON THE BROOM PLEASE

oh thank god

diana was FOLLOWING HER EVERY STEP SO SHE COULD CATCH HER AGAIN

LOOK AT THEM GO LOOK AT THIS TEAMWORK

OH SHIT

OH GOD

DIANA 

SCREAMING FOR AKKO

A G A  AIN

THIS IS THE 3RD TIME 

I

OH MY GOD I HAVE TO KEEP PAUSING TO SCREAM

Oh my god

oh MY GOD SHE KEEP

SCREAMING FOR HER

OH MY GOD MY HEART IS TOO WEAK AND GAY FOR THIS

oh my god did she 

the bird

oH MY GOD

D I A NA A

DIANAA

OH MY GOD OHNMY Y GOD D

OH Y GOD!!!

MY HEART IS SHOOK IM SHOOK OH MY GOD

OHHH 

NOOOOOOOOO

OH MY GOD S OH MY GOF DIM GONNAC RY THTI SIS IT

THIS

IS

 EVERYHTING

SHE CAUGHT DIANA IN RETURN

SHOOTING STAR CAME BACK

SHINY RAAAAAYYYYY

IS PLAYING IM

OYU GUSYS 

I CANT IM GUFKCING

THIS IS 

EVERYTHING

you guys

im

im literally crying im typing through tears i cant fucking see

im

they

they held hands 

they did shiny arc together

tehey

im

is this real im really fucking i cant see im c rying

oh my god

this cant be real this has to be a dream i 

i

the magic

all over the world

oh my god the rod is 

disappearing

AKKO ALMOST CRIED BUT

SHE LET IT GO

look 

at them

standing on top of the wORLD TOGETHER

what in the name of all that’s holy did we ever do to deserve Little Witch Academia

OH MAN

CHARIOT IS KEEPING HER HAIR RED!!! JUST LIKE!!! WHAT NEON AND I SAID!!!

OH MY GOD

OOHHH MY LORD

CROIX IS GONNA

CURE WAGANDEA’S POISON

FOR CHARIOT

OH YM GOD

THAT IS A PROMISE

FOR HER TO RETURNT O CHARIOT

ONCE CROIX HAS FGOTTEN HER SHIT TOGETHER

wow um fuck me Chariot is so fucking GORGEOUS WITH THE RED HAIR LIKE THIS????????

holy fuck

OH!!!

MY GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

LOOK AT

THEM ALL

BEING 

FRIENDS

DIANA AND AMANDA HAVING TEA

SUCY AND CONSTANZE

HANNAH AND JASNA

LOTTE AND BARBARA OVER NIGHTFALL HOLY SHIT THAT IS SOMETHING THE FANS HAVE BEEN CRAVING SINCE EPISODE 4 HOLY SHIT

oh my god oohh my fCUKING  GOD

EVERYONE CAME

TO WATCH AKKO FLY

AND

SHE

DID

IM

OH MY GODDDDDDDDD

YOU GUYS

THIS 

THIS IS IT

AND IM

I AM

SO

FUCKING

HAPPY

THIS WAS EVERYTHING WE EVER COULD HAVE WANTED AND MORE

THIS INCORPORATED EVERY ELEMENT FROM THE SHOW’S PREVIOUS 24 EPISODES ALL INTO ONE

EVERYTHING WAS RIGHT HERE PERFECTLY IN ITS PLACE

EVEN AKKO FLYING HER BROOM SO MUCH FROM THE FIRST OPENING THEME

FINALLY IT MAKES SENSE WHY THEY PUT THAT IN THE OPENING IF SHE COULDNT FLY

CUZ SHE LEARNS TO

AT THE VERY

VERY

END

i....

have never seen

a better anime ending

ever

like literally im not even just saying that

this was

 the best

thing

ever

in my entire life

god bless Little Witch Academia