#y'all at this point I don't have time to write or draw for shit so please consider my terrible and sexy ideas

[hwsforeignrelations]

Researching US debt for a very sexy finance essay and im just imagining this candle lit scene at a beautiful sushi restaurant and there's this very sweet, content atmosphere. Al's like don't u worry my boiled brisket bbygurl i got the check. And he opens his wallet and at LEAST a dozen credit cards spill out onto the table.

Now Arthur is just amused and playing footsie while Alfreds pretending like he doesn't notice and is nonchalantly flipping thru the credit cards to find one that's not maxed out.

Then they scurry off and marathon sex their way through all 9 reading/ref rooms of the Jefferson library of congress

[pagodazz]

Emh fans when they're asked to stop sexualizing Evan Jennings and his characters because it makes him and his wife uncomfortable:

hope y'all are so happy with yourself for going against his wishes and being fucking freaks to him. You're all why he's barely online anymore. you cannot behave and you cannot be normal and you all have ruined what could be a very fun fandom.

Everyone in this fandom sees Evan as a piece of meat basically, you all only care about his character because Evan is a good looking guy. I mean!! let's be real here!!! let me quiz you on the lore!!! let me see just how fucking much you know about ALL the characters. let me see how much you ACTUALLY give a shit. Because all any of you do is post about how attractive you find Evan/habit and it's honestly so annoying.

I'm not saying you can't compliment him??? or appreciate his looks?? but drawing him in sexually compromising positions, writing in great detail about what you want him to do to you (PUBLICLY. no one gives a SHIT what you fucking do in private.) Or you're fucking mixing up habit and Evan, and just acting like you know his story when CLEARLY the most of you have watched habit compilations on YouTube and NOTHING else.

You cannot even convince me otherwise because I deal with people coming in my comments all the time asking about BASIC INFORMATION. like IF YOU DON'T KNOW THE PRINCETON TAPES ????? WHAT THE FUCK. WHAT THE FUCK????? YOU NEED THAT FOR THE SERIES. YOU CANNOT EVEN BEGIN TO UNDERSTAND HALF THE THINGS WITHOUT IT???????

This isn't saying you can't write fanfiction or shit like that this is JUST SAYING BE RESPECTFUL?????? these slenderverse actors ARE NOT A LIST CELEBRITIES. they're not like fucking Oscar Isaac or whoever people are obsessed with right now. THEY'RE NOT FAMOUS. THIS IS NICHE. THIS IS NOT POPULAR MEDIA 😭😭😭😭

Emh literally made NO money from their series, they didn't create it to gain anything like that. they created something fun and NOW YOU ALL ARE THE REASON THEY HAVE NO PART IN THIS FANDOM ANYMORE.

you robbed them of being able to love their creation and I hope you're all happy about that honestly because it seems like this fandom is only gonna get worse in this area. and I'm deeply disappointed.

edit: I would like to add one thing, Vincent caffarello had to deal with situations of extreme sexualization as well, and his got to the point to where he had to leave. Vinnie used to be very involved with the fandom, he even used to read fanfic which he had to stop doing because people would be writing characters to SEXUALLY ASSAULT HIM or others and he just couldn't continue to read things like that. He delt with minors sending him explicit photos and messages and that's literally all kinds of FUCKED UP. He did NOT want to be involved with that stuff.

It's like when Evan had someone impersonate him to try to get with minors. THESE PEOPLE ARE NOT OBJECTS FOR YOU TO SEEK OUT PLEASURE WITH. THEY ARE PEOPLE.

they are HUMAN.

if they were women?? would you be doing this as much??? or would you realize how messed up it really is.

[quinloki]

I'm usually pretty open about everything - kink, smut, sex, morality, etc. including, I hope, mental health. But I don't know that I talk about it often as I could.

I'm not obligated to share things about myself. I choose to - I'm not obligated to write, draw, or even answer asks - I do these things because I find enjoyment in them, and I personally find extra enjoyment by creating a space that's comfortable for more than just me.

Today, is a bad day. I get them - I talk about getting them I know, I'm pretty open with "don't panic, I'm just taking a day away." or lower keyed, or some such.

One of the reasons I'm like that is because about three years ago I lost an exceptionally dear friend.

A force of nature.

A... objectively good person, who was, at the time of his passing about a year younger than I was.

Far too young. Here one moment, gone the next.

Today is hard. The A/C is out, it's hot outside, there's three fans in the room and one in the window trying desperately to keep things cool and comfortable enough. Funnily enough my day job, that good old 9-5 is the least stressful thing I'm dealing with.

I passed out from the stress a bit ago. Not like, blacked out and hit the floor, but like, one minute I'm eating on the couch, the next it's 2 hours later and my throat hurts because I was leaned back snoring like some old geezer conked out for an afternoon nap.

Which was more stress - I missed waking up my spouse, missed the time I could've spent doing other things, missed - well.

It's not yet a good day.

Honestly, I'm not sure what I mean with this post. I'll be okay, I always am. I guess I wanted to let people know, as much as I appreciate that y'all look up to me, please do not ever make the mistake of thinking I'm, I don't know, endlessly in control, I guess.

I struggle, say dumb shit, make mistakes, have pretty severe panic attacks, am 100% depressed, am egregiously terrified of bugs (I cannot tell you how much I loathe the fact that the window is open right now), and certainly have plenty of times, moments... days - weeks, every now and again - where it's not ideal.

Being true to myself in the face of that is, probably, kind of cool. I can concede that much.

Whatever my point for this post was, in closing I'll say - you're not alone. You're 100% worth it. It's so much bullshit to hear "it does get better" because it does, but it's never fast enough I swear. It's okay to have it down pat and then just not. Mistakes are a part of life you'll be making them in your 70s, but so long as you can take something from learn - a lesson learned, a capacity expanded, an understanding that some mistakes will be things you repeat, despite your best laid plans, and that's okay.

I love you - as a friend, as an acquaintance, as a fellow member of the wildly variable and frustratingly complicated collective known as humans, and maybe even as something more.

I'm glad you're here.

[nephilimcursed]

Bella & The Boys Headcannons~ Laito Edition

TW: This has some triggering content.

"You've been locked in here forever and you just can't say goodbye~ Your lips, my lips, Apocalypse"

OKAY, Y'all know I love Kanato the best- BUT BELLA/LAITO IS JUST WOW-

They're so cute, I swear.

Bella wasn't clueless to all of his remarks, contrary to what y'all might think. She actually gets annoyed though.

She was hit on a lot during Shadowhunter training, by her own instructors. So being around Laito at first makes her cringe bad.

Yeah, she lowkey is done with him at first. Still drawn to him due to having a personality that was intended for him, but hella fed up.

But when she starts to fall- holy fucking shit.

When I write Bella/Laito scenes they don't feel like a stereotypical romance, like Bella/Kanato.

We all know the diaboys never really will change- so Bella was crafted as a mirror, to fit their interest.

So she starts falling for him and tries to get him to engage in deeper talks with her, like about all kinds of things, his interests and stuff.

He taught her piano and they play together.

Laito starts falling for Bella and he's wondering 'Um, what the actual fuck is this??'

He tries to kill her, because he's so scared of what's happening, but he can't bring himself to put the knife deeper in her chest. So she's just wounded.

And by this time, she has a stele again so she can just draw a rune on herself to heal.

So once she does draw that rune on, she's kinda pissed but at the same time quickly gets how scary this must be for him.

Then he tries to kill himself.

To which Bella has to try to calm him down and get him out of his panic attack, so we get a cute cuddle session.

I think seeing Laito in a more sweet tone is just, chef's kiss.

So once she tries to explain to him, he's also kinda '??????'

Doesn't accept it right away.

But then she asks if she has a different effect on him than most other girls.

You can see where I'm going with this.

So onto real headcannons- THEY ALSO ARE SUPER PHYSICAL WITH LOVE.

They're always touching each other in some way- I swear-

The other boys sometimes get jealous.

Laito will randomly sneak into her bed alot, like Ayato did in the anime with Yui.

This one is also super sweet. In Shadowhunter training, they only really teach you stuff to survive and stuff to fit in with higher class society if needed to blend in.

So Bella is clueless about her own body-

Her anatomy, I mean.

Laito is the one to teach her, because he got to talk with her before Reiji did.

He kinda did a good job explaining it?? He tried to do it in a more scientific manner but failed at times and made some jokes.

He also explained male anatomy. Was also a little bad at that-

She ended up getting the gist of it though.

Fucking god- this man is actually so sweet when he wants to be.

Okay, so as y'all know, Bella has an eating disorder because of what The Clave always forces her to do: Work without eating.

So she will go days without food.

Once Reiji and the others all get her to eat at least three meals a day, she starts getting to a healthy weight for her body type (curvy).

But she gets so insecure then.

She was so used to being stick thin, so she never thought her body would change in a way that made her thicker.

It gets to the point where she even tries to starve herself yet again.

Cue Laito to the rescue.

He would basically rave about her every attribute until her ears were sore. Touching, caring, just showing her why she shouldn't be insecure.

Feeds her personally, and expects to be fed back.

He definitely makes her feel pretty again.

Bella isn't vain, but she's just not used to such a thing changing.

Takes her out to candlelit dinners a lot.

Bella doesn't like his fedora by the way, she takes it off all the time.

Laito always laughs though and puts it on her head instead-

"Lai, stop trying to put it on me! I'm not a fucking idiot like you-"

"You love it~"

"Ew, gross-"

They're so silly like that whole exchange would have been teasing on both sides.

Their dates are all in intimate places, not a big crowd. Laito uses his dad's credit card to pay-

He spoilssssss her too. Expensive gifts like designer clothes and lingerie. (EVEN THOUGH SHE CRINGED AT THE LINGERIE-)

In return, she's always trying to do anything for him. In an SFW manner of course.

She slept with him first the day before her birthday, [Not going into detail, don't worry]

Bella was avoiding it though, because she didn't want Laito (or any of the triplets) to start thinking she was just like their mother.

But she gave up and into her craving for him when he convinced her, she still prays he won't see her as another version of that woman because she cares way too much to fuck him over in any way.

She dies the very next day, due to Karlheinz poisoning her tea.

Laito is fucking sobbing as hard as Kanato is and panicking as much as Reiji is when she's foaming at the mouth.

When she dies, he goes ballistic.

Once they kill Karlheinz he's even more upset somehow. Because the pain she felt from the poison was nothing like how they killed Karl.

Visits her grave a lot. A lot, lot.

He keeps what he bought for her as memories.

Laito was devastated.

[specialized-rexan]

SCREENSHOTS I GOT FROM THE JEREMY JORDAN LIVESTREAM YESTERDAY. especially love the comments on his duck drawings. he was very proud of some of them since he needed to practice before the stream. he admits he does not draw much lol

and here's Lucifer's signature that Jeremy came up with: a cursive capital L attached to a pentagram!

the stream was SO FUN and literally only felt like 20 minutes even tho it was almost an hour

at one point he mentioned he's making pancakes with olive oil now since he has high cholesterol, and that he LOVES how the pancakes turned out. someone responded:

(later someone joked he should make pancakes with bacon grease and he almost shouted (not angrily) "DO YOU WANT ME TO DIE? I JUST SAID I HAVE HIGH CHOLESTEROL. I just said. I had high cholesterol. Are you TRYING. To kill me."

anyway back to screenshots lol)

"Take that, depression!" was a popular quote to write on prints, and he said he hoped we're not depressed and it was very sweet

some more quotes written during the stream and other notes:

"I'm gonna be signing these prints of my boy Lucifer, the short king of Hell"

he drank both a cold smoothie and hot tea during the stream. "Doesn't make any goddamn sense, but here we go."

"It's never too late to fuck up--too late to fuck shit up" (a legitimate accidental stammer. but still perfect in its own way)

"Every time I hear the name 'Shay' I think of my daughter's friend at school. My daughter's obsessed with a friend named Shay. 'S all she talks about. 'Shay Shay Shay Shay Shay Shay.' Shay and Madeline. It's like 'You can be your own person. Clara. You are your own HUMAN.' …HAPPY BIRTHDAY, KATHERINE."

hopes to go to some conventions for Hazbin Hotel. more likely to go to cons in New York, New Jersey (where he lives), or Philly area

"He's just a li'l cutie. :3 Is he really da bosh? :3" (wondering if Lucifer really is the Big Boss of Hell Himself or if it's just more of a title)

"Hope you're not depressed"

" 'Write something Lucifer would say to cheer someone up.' And I think Lucifer would think that… 'SINGING MAKES EVERYTHING BETTER!' At least when it comes to rebuilding your relationship with your daughter."

"Guess what's in my smoothie. There are six ingredients. Go."

"…said draw a little duck, so I drew the smallest duck I could. (holds print up to camera then says in small high-pitched voice:) It's a little duck!"

MORE QUOTES UNDER THE CUT. THIS POST IS GETTING LONG ASFQJSKSKSKKS

_____

about his smoothie again: "Obviously, I just went to the gym. So I gotta have some kinda supplement in there. ... WHAT'S THE BASE, Y'ALL? YOU GOTTA HAVE A BASE." (someone could use that audio and give a character a bass guitar lol)

(still about people guessing smoothie ingredients:) "WATER? Why would I put water in my smoothie. (mutters:) Water is for losers. ... Kale! -grins and points at camera- That's it! You win. That's my smoothie."

his smoothie was blueberries, bananas, strawberries, protein powder, almond milk, kale

"…with a hUUGE shmiley faysh! :3" (about a little " =) " smile he wrote with an autograph)

"THAT DUCK IS CUTE!"

"We love, we stan Lilith"

AGGRESSIVELY, ABOUT A JOKE HE MADE: "GET IT?"

Some fatherly advice from Lucifer: "Don't fuck up your lives like I did 😎"

HE SANG THE START OF HELL'S GREATEST DAD AND WANTS A MIMZY-LESS VERSION THAT ACTUALLY HAS AN ENDING QSJFKSKKSKS

he's only seen Hazbin Hotel once, and he had "~champagne fountains, caviar mountains, that's just to staaart~" going through his head for the two+ years between recording his lines and the show airing. he wasn't able to tell anyone it because of non-disclosure stuff, and eventually he even forgot what that song line was from. but it still went through his head

"[Person he was signing an autograph for] is a bi girl [bisexual], and that's pretty baller"

"AN INCREDIBLE DUCK YOU SHALL HAVE"

"Take that depression!! Quack"

"Hold please!" (i just liked imagining Lucifer saying almost any small thing)

Jeremy Jordan says Lucifer is short, and not just that all the other characters are tall (i cannot confirm that that is canon even tho that's what i want LOL) "What gives!? There are short people in this world, and they need some love"

someone asked what he thinks about OC x canon ships. he was confused about what OC means and then when the chat explained, he was confused about how "OC x canon" works. but he figured it out after thinking for a moment. "So basically everybody wants to fuck Lucifer. GOT IT."

"Am I going to Hell for this" (about all the pentagrams he's drawing)

"…so i just did a bunch of stars and hearts around Emery's name 💜"

someone asked about his favorite Hazbin Hotel song, and he answered that season 2 has a rock song he really likes 👀 👀

"(a requested phrase for an autograph:) 'Duck lord loves you no matter what.' ...Don't know what that particularly means but…"

[iamheretoyell]

HEEEEEEEY

Whenever someone makes fan art for me, I wanna cry cause WHAT I LOVE Y'ALL WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU LIKE MY STUFF ENOUGH TO WANT TO DRAW IT I'M JUST A SILLY LITTLE RAT IN A TRENCH COAT ATP

(my third meeting for today got cancelled and my payroll is basically done so I'm likely going to be extra loud on here for the next 2-4 business hours (after I finish catching up on this fic))

I CAUGHT UP AND AM DOING HOMEWORK ON FUCKING PARALLAXES LIKE WHAT

I kinda wanna work on Revelations... Ignoring the voices fr rn

3:55 update, guys they fucked around and made my homework like, fun??? --- specifically the kind of fun that my neurodivergent lore-hungry ass dies for. WHY DID THEY DO THAT?? WHY AM I MAD THAT I HAVE TO DO SHIT THAT ISN'T MY HOMEWORK RIGHT NOW????

5:49, I just want you guys to know, since the game has been concepted, I will randomly just think about the ships in it, especially now that they're all tagged, and I just laugh about the fact that I literally own majority of the ship tags. And like, another two of them, I am like one of the only people who actively writes them. And that's genuinely so fucking funny to me like I always get a laugh out of that.

Don't ask me where I got them because they wrote themselves. (Except for Damien/Brimmy, and yes, there is a huge rant about it ready for the day someone opens up the Pandora's box of "how the fuck did you get a ship out of that??" I mean, it also wrote itself, but in a completely different way and there is a very clear cut progression from me having no idea who the fuck Brimmy was literally not even a year ago to them being one of my favorite doomed ships to write.)

But I bring this up because I'm killing time and laughing over this at the moment.

BUT AT SOME POINT I DO WANT TO POST A POLL BC I GEN WANNA KNOW WHAT Y'ALLS FAVORITE SHIP THAT I HAVE (QUESTIONABLY) CREATED IS. LIKE I'M SO FUCKING NOSY BC I HAVE ONES THAT LIKE--- I love as I live and breathe. And then there are ones that just like, fit for the story, are me playing around with dynamics bc I take nothing seriously and sometimes I just do that, or some other random fucking reason I've put a ship together (for example, the ship isn't even real, they're just being forced together for the sake of a manufactured story within a story, and this example is so not super specific and has nothing to do with anything I've ever written, am writing, or will write in the future).

I got off topic. Whatever. I'm taking my leave to go act like a village idiot because it's literally halloween.

HAPPY HALLOWEEN EVERYONE.<3

I MAY OR MAY NOT COME BACK TO DRUNKENLY POST--

Holy shit it's Friday tonight????

Let's fucking go I guess???

ANYWAYS MAY OR MAY NOT COME BACK TO DRUNKENLY POST AN ANSWER LATER.

Also p.s. if anyone's actually reading An Answer,

A. do you want to beta???? pretty please????

B. did you fall into my trap??? are you completely put off by the creek in it yet??? wait idk how far I even am post wise. WHATEVER MY POINT STANDS BC IT'S NOT EVEN JUST THE CREEK. ARE YOU PUT OFF BY THE STORY AND THE WAY IT'S BEING TOLD AND THE WAY THE CHARACTERS ACT?????

I really fucking hope so cause that's like the whole point LMAOOOO LIKE An Answer was so experimental on my part which in hindsight was maybe a bad idea because like-- we rarely get Mysterion being the villain and I was like

oh let me try something I've NEVER done before!!!

hope it carries!!!

but in the same breath, I don't really care because it will never be that serious and Kenny is also the villain in the Trin series. Maybe. Questionably. Kind of. At some point.

AND WITH THAT I'VE ACTUALLY SAID TOO MUCH BYE FOR NOW<3

[destinygoldenstar]

☀️There Can Only Be ONE Best Boy☀️ - Total Drama Viewer Reacts to Disventure Camp Season 1 Episode 4 “Slip N Slide”

I decided, for both to give my followers less of spoilers and for some flare, I would cheaply draw over some screenshots.

For the Purple Team's reward, they got a waterproof tent. But they neglected the fireproof tent as a result, and the producers weren't careful with last challenge.

Nick would be, understandably, terrified of the place, and Alec would be like "Wow, this is an improvement" but look at it so stoically.

So, welcome back to Arson Camp!

Let us continue with the chaos!

Fiore's chilling by the fires, probably writing some AO3 fanfics.

What fandom would Fiore be in? I'm curious.

I feel like this six year old would be into something violent like Mortal Kombat.

"A girl like you should not be awake at this hour."

*looks over at my clock*

Lilly you don't have to call me out like that.

"I don't even listen to my own mom and she thinks she can control me?!"

If you weren't six, I would say slay and tell them what's for...

But you're six. So...

"If you were feeling safe, I've got bad news for you."

Welp, Lilly's gone. I called it.

OH GOD NO!!!

WHY?!?!??!?! HOW DOES THIS BENEFIT YOU!??!??!?!?!

I feel like this was my fault because I made the fire joke.

Fiore was like, "You know, I had this weird feeling that some viewer named AnalyzGolden was watching us and she told me to burn shit. And now I suddenly have the urge to do it."

Goddammit me.

What next? The characters in that heading get eliminated today?

The subtitle again. I CAN'T with these parenthesis XD

(I have subtitles on because sometimes I mishear stuff when I watch stuff the first time)

"I'm not going to be part of this argument."

*holds back a laugh* Alec's actually so based for that.

Y'all want less DRAMA in TOTAL DRAMA?

Simple answer.

You just walk away from it.

"I think I know who did it." *Among Us Music*

*chokes on breath*

NO. NO.

DID I HEAR THAT RIGHT?!?!

*rewinds*

NO THEY ACTUALLY DID THAT. OMG.

THEY MADE THE JOKE FOR ME.

I was making several Among Us jokes last episode.

I feel like I've become some overlord and they somehow hear me and do what I tell them.

"For some reason Golden is telling me I'm very SUS... huh, wonder what that means."

Fiore if you can hear me. I didn't say you had slay pass. I never said that.

The only one I gave slay pass was Grett.

You have to earn yours.

"Lill?! What in queen's name did you do?!" *sound effect*

Okay. Now it's getting a bit crazy.

"I don't think Lill would do this to us."

THANK YOU. THANK YOU ASHLEY.

"It's about psychology in different kinds of people."

"It says here that people who enter reality competitions and get tempted by money have the tendency to become more ruthless and emotionally manipulative to their advantage, derailing their personalities. If you'd like some examples from the many seasons of Total Drama, I'd be happy to give you an analogy."

"What makes you think I wouldn't want to read it?"

You're six.

"Well... fair point."

Okay. I guess that's not a point.

"It's a drawing. My son drew it for me."

Alec has a family?

I mean he did look older, I admit, but I didn't think anyone here had kids.

So is Alec in this game to help his family with funds? We got another one.

'List of Motives:'

'Fiore: Abandoned'

'Ashley: Save Farm'

'Jake: Help Grandma'

'Tom: Sus'

'Nick: Prove Himself'

'Alec: Family'

'Everyone else: ???'

"I'm just as confused as you."

I have NO IDEA what happened AT ALL. It totally wasn't me who flipped. I was sure Drew was the impostor!

"Then what if Drew voted for himself?"

He said 'Fuck this shit I'm out'.

"He knew things I didn't want anyone to know."

"I just can't tell anyone about my hobbies, okay?!"

"As long as Grett doesn't tell either of them I should be fine."

Hey Grett. Maybe you should tell Jake something. Just a thought.

...

WAIT I SAID THAT AS A JOKE, HOLD ON-

"For some reason I have the urge to tell Jake something. Huh, wonder who this Golden Voice is."

"I voted for Gabby because the boys told me to."

Was it Dan that suggested Gabby??

*looks back*

Actually no it wasn't. I was gonna call hypocrisy, but that'd be me complaining about something that's not there. Okay.

Alright I won't bully him. This time.

"Nobody can be trusted here."

"Nobody can be trusted here-anyway, Tom, who never shows his face, can I trust that you'll vote with me?"

"I'm disappointed that Dan voted for me."

Oh, you're actually affected by that. Wow.

Okay, here you go Gabby. You can have slay pass. ⚔️

Use it for whatever you want to eliminate with. If you want to use it on Dan, go ahead. I don't care if he goes tbh.

I just realized most of my favs are on the same team XD

Oooh, swimming episode!

Tom is STILL in his suit XD

"Hey uh, Tom, the sun can't reach you if you're underwater. I don't think you need to be wearing that. You don't want to get your normal clothes wet, right?"

"Eh I never found use for a swimsuit anyway! Besides! The sun will dry them up quickly!"

"Doesn't that go against what you told us earlier?!"

"My relationship with the sun does not concern you! No it's not toxic what are you talking about?!"

But he's not wearing the hoodie anymore! That's an improvement!

I feel like we're gonna get a Tom face reveal at some point, right?

Oooh.

I didn't think there would be a cabin.

And a phone to call home? PLEASE tell me they take advantage of this and we learn more about these characters homelives!

"You're not yelling and talking nonsense... I like it."

Grett. You're so awful. I love you.

I have such BAD TASTES for favorites, don't I?

(Idk who the fan favorites/hated characters are)

That's not an english subtitle.

...I'm not gonna say anything further than that, cause I'm scared that the joke in my head is very offensive.

"What did you expect? Nobody likes you and everyone thinks you're crazy."

I... I mean technically she's right. Doesn't make it right to rub salt in the wound though.

I still love you Gabby. Don't worry.

"Have you lied to me too?"

"Of course."

Oh WOW.

I did NOT expect her to just be blunt and honest like that.

Why is a VILLAIN character so honest about what they do? That's such a unique character trait. I love how they're using it.

"For what it's worth, I believe you."

"You have no reason to lie. I've known you for a few days and you always put this alliance first."

THANK YOU ASHLEY FOR BEING THE SMART ONE ON THIS TEAM.

Fiore struggling to paddle, omg

"My hands are killing me. You think you can row for me if I pay you?"

Nick...

Nick, I'm waiting patiently for your character development. You better deliver cause you've annoyed me this episode and last episode. Jake's gonna take crown for best boy if you're not careful.

Also, she's a KID and can't even hold one paddle right.

"I'm already tired of always eating fish."

Yeah, that has to get tedious after awhile, especially if you guys are THAT hungry and have no choice.

I hate seafood. I wouldn't survive.

"What are you craving?"

"Chinese takeout. I always order that at home."

My sibling actually loves Chinese as well... I'm a Mexican person, though.

"There's a restaurant I live near that'll knock your socks off. We should go when this is over."

TOM. Are you... ASKING HIM OUT?!

"Hey, your eyes... they're pretty. I never noticed since you've always got that hood on."

AWWW AND THE RETURNED FLIRT?!

THE BLUSH, OMG

...yeah I kinda hope you kiss now.

This is how you make relationships Total Drama. You meet. You get along. And you be cute.

And I am waiting for this to go horribly wrong cause in shows like this, nobody gets a happy ending.

Except Mike & Zoey I guess.

"Maybe them fighting is good news."

"If we found popcorn it would be a fun movie to watch. I'm just saying."

"Honestly, a million dollars would make my life so much better."

"What would you spend the money on?"

"I want to study fashion design. Just don't have the time or money. Back home, I have to juggle two jobs that barely keep me afloat."

That has to be THE most relatable Young Adult experience ever.

I hate that I have a privilege from my parents to go to a college I don't even like.

Add that to the list...

'Ellie: College Finance'

"*Ellie clicks the check*

*Spawns an ad on USAA*

OH NO! THEY LIED!!!

Ellie's real fear is her finances XD"

I PREDICTED THIS LAST EPISODE AND I DIDN'T EVEN REALIZE IT

"Dear lord up above, why must you forsaken me on a canoe with this wretched child?!"

THAT'S WHAT I'M SAYING!!

Stop hating Dan, me. He didn't do anything.

And two seconds later I laugh at his expense 😂

"It's not the first time I've done this."

"Back in my day we had to canoe rapids just to get to school!"

"Back in grade school-"

Oh my god and she took my joke.

"The objective of the game is to knock your opponent into the lake."

*shoves Dan in the lake*

"Hey you guys talk about this Golden voice lately, I think she's bullying me. Why you bullying me?"

Do something and don't be sexist.

"First showdown will be Tom vs Alec"

If Tom loses this I'm in firm disbelief.

He has ninja skills.

Why is Jake the only one cheering and supporting his teammate?

This boy is precious. Look at him. He's PRECIOUS.

"Next showdown: Grett vs Ellie"

Sorry Ellie. I do like you, I swear.

THAT WAS A ONE SHOT. GEEZ.

"Golden told me to SLAY. So I slayed!" 💅

"Next up: Gabby vs Lill"

Gabby for the win?

Oh she's GOING THERE

"You forgot: Golden gave ME slay pass too!!"

Aw, she lost.

I guess that makes sense though cause it would be too easy.

"Hey that's not fair! She used Gabby's duel stick!"

"Eh it looked painful though so I'll allow it."

Chris McLean taught you well.

"Next showdown: Dan vs Ashley"

Kick his ass, Ashley.

GREAT. XD

OMG are you kidding me?! XD

"We too are aware of Golden's presence! So we decided to entertain her with pinning the best boys against each other!"

"Sorry Golden, but here in Disventure Camp, THERE CAN ONLY BE ONE BEST BOY."

OH GOD HE'S PISSED

NUT SHOT

I REPEAT. WE HAVE A NUT SHOT.

"Jake scores! The Teal Team win Immunity and reward!"

Welp, guess that's that. The show has decided.

Unless Nick stays, which is pretty likely, so.

FOR NOW, Jake has my crown as best boy. We stan a guy who has no shame in denying another guy the right to have kids.

"See that's my own personal true personality reveal Golden! I'm an asshole too, just like Grett! Don't you love me?!"

Yes. Yes I do.

"Listen Nick, can we talk?"

Yes. Please talk. Please work things out.

"I think I've heard enough this morning to decide who I'm voting for."

"You don't have to behave like that, Nick!"

Why is Ashley the most reasonable character on this team?!

TELL HIM OFF.

"At least give Lill a chance!"

"I've already made my decision. Cheers."

Now I have even less regrets siding with Jake over you.

"I think we should vote together and take control of the team."

And here's where Alec and Ellie become swing votes.

Ellie's just the outlier here. "Um... I didn't ask to be a part of the villains team, why am I put on it? I didn't do anything wrong!"

I didn't put you there, Ellie. That was not me this time.

"I feel like I can be myself around them."

Ellie meanwhile, "WHERE'S THE EXIT?! SAVE MEEEEEE"

"Lill, it genuinely frightens me that you handle kids."

Just shut up.

"If I had a kid, I wouldn't let em anywhere near you."

"And I never will because SOMEONE busted my balls today!"

Ashley, once again, being the most reasonable one here.

'LILL'

Yeah, yeah, we know.

'FIORE'

'FIORE'

'NICK'

O_O

OH. GOD.

'NICK'

I-

I-

I FEEL LIKE THIS WAS MY FAULT.

I SHOULD NOT HAVE PUT HIM IN THE HEADING.

I CAUSED THIS.

"Because you're one of the worst in the challenges. Also, I can't stand you."

Wow. It really was that petty.

Tom, what ninja shit are you doing this time?

Pfft. He's a bad spy.

"Uh, I am standing right here and can see you!"

Alright, that was Episode 4...

Damn. I shouldn't have put Nick in the heading. I cursed him and caused his elimination.

I thought they were setting up a lot of character development for him cause I felt like he had an interesting story with his parents and wanting to prove himself...

But no. He did absolutely none of that and continued to be a spoiled lazy entitled snob up till his elimination.

And like... sure? If you need early boots?

Why couldn't it be Dan? Smh

This episode took what I said last episode and said "UH UH. You can only have one best boy as your choice. That's the rule." And forced them to fight for that position.

But if we had to choose between the two, I can't argue with Jake.

Idk who the favorites/hated characters are, and I feel like I have bad taste. One's an actual bitch and very open about it. But you know what? Gabby and Jake are sweethearts who deserve to be stanned.

Gabby is fun. She's full of personality. People are outcasting her for no reason and it's sad. I want Gabby to use her slay pass and revolt. Girl has done nothing wrong in her entire life.

And Jake? Come on. He's precious. He's a sweetheart. Look at him. And he takes no shit apparently. Man has done nothing wrong in his entire life.

I feel like Lilly's going next just cause she knows too much. But if that leaves Ashley alone to be the saving grace of the team till the merge I can't argue. I like her quite a bit.

I also like that Ellie and Alec are doing stuff now. Oh how the tables have turned.

They both have motives that are quite empathetic. It's so nice.

Why you working with the demon child though?

"I didn't ask to be put in hell with her Golden! I just wanted to make fashion! LET ME OUT!!!"

#SaveEllie

If you guys want me to continue these reactions, be sure to let me know.

[viperra1]

hello it's me again a bit late on the draw but anyway... can you tell me more about Vultures interpersonal relationships... I know you've talked about him and a variety of the companions in particular boone, veronica, and arcade but if you'd like to detail what those are all like? or even just link me to any posts you've made about that cuz I'm super intrigued 🥹🤞

HELLOOO 😭😭 i'm sorry for the late answer!! was feeling sick for a few days and lemme tell you trying to write something coherent in another language while the fever kicks your ass is not fun. at all.

KHEM.

as for your question, thank you SO MUCH for asking!!

vulture and boone did not kick it off perfectly friendly at first, but it did not take long for them to grow closer. they still do bicker about this and that, they can be mad at each other for something (they both have TEMPER..) but first and foremost they are gentle and teasing and they fully trust each other without a shadow of a doubt! they remind onlookers of an old married couple, 'cause they can bicker in one moment and then lovingly sharing dinner and talking about their plans for tomorrow in the next instant. they be like that.

when it comes to tense and uncomfortable situations, they tend to rely on each other - boone can be rational and cold-blooded, something that the other lacks, and vulture can be quick-witted and empathetic (in order to quicky and quetly calm down a hostage, for example).

when they first met, boone thought that vulture's a little crazy and naive at the same time - and helpless, in some matters. he regarded the other with sceptisism, which vulture sensed and it caused him to close off. but then life threw some hard shit to deal with at them, and boone accepted that this man is not so helpless after all (later on, he accepted that vulture is, in fact, more mighty than he thought), and vulture opened up and learned that boone is not a threat but a protector (and a safest place he could ever find).

i got a little carried away with them 😭 OKAY now for vulture's other besties

veronica is a first friend vulture ever had! they met not long after vulture met boone (perhaps i will tell y'all about their first meeting some other time?), and honestly, they embody this rare friend dynamic where you are literally platonic soulmates and you almost never fight and just. live in total harmony. best buddies. they love to pull pranks on the others, and they tease each other constantly. if there's some mischief, they will be in it together, no doubt!

arcade's a bit different, though - i feel like when he got into vulture's party, he felt... off, at first. as if he did not belong in this established group of tightly bonded people (vulture, boone and veronica had travelled together for a lot beforehand). but vulture needed his help, so he pulled through. they dynamic started off as cautious and more bussiness-like than friendly (vulture was... tired and confused, at this point of his story) - they discussed politics, strategies, history, etc. but they will grow closer, because vulture is vulnerable, and arcade is kind and patient, and after some shit that they went through they developed a deep friendly bond. (and they started to tease each other mercilessly, too)

raul......... raul is really like a father-mentor-grandpa-uncle type of figure to vulture. raul was freaking flabbergasted by the kid at first - vulture broke into his impromtu prison cell and literally shoved some notebook at him the moment raul said something with a spanish accent. well, woulnd't you know it! turns out, vulture was mexican, in his sort-of-past life! vulture is ever-curious of anything that might be even loosely related to his past, so they bond over raul's stroies pretty much immideatly. raul is a tired old man, so they don't talk that much - more often than not, vulture would just get them both a beer and a meal and they would quietly eat together on a couch. or they would go out and raul would teach the kid some tricks with a revolver. typical dad activities, no?

i know that vulture's not friendly with cass (more like vice versa) and he adores lily. i just still haven't fleshed out their interactions well enough.

i feel like this is getting too long SO!!!! THANK YEEEWWWWWW sm for asking!! please ask me moreee and you can ask of his relationships with non-companions, i will gLADLY elaborate!!

[snoddie]

Attempting to explain the Gregnant au

Ok wow, where do I even begin. (Bonus warning, PM fans have to read a lot-)

[The actual name of this Au]

So first of all, I'm officially calling this au the Nymph au (Nymph is a term for a baby cockroach), you could also call this the Gregnant au but that word being my Distortion trigger is how it came to be in the first place.

[How this au even happened]

Basically on my YouTube channel (which you should totally sub to plug plug plug plug- https://youtube.com/@oddie97?si=Y5I17RjJRQDRbiJ0) I uploaded videos about Gregor and everytime I'd get the dreaded Gregnant meme in the comments, as a result I made a joke community post that if I get one more Gregnant comment, I'd actually draw it. One more comment later and I made the video.

https://youtu.be/El889VT6gns?si=V0CtdLTAgTENpUre

Now unsurprisingly, this didn't deter the Gregnant meme, if anything it made it worse (wow making a video with Gregnant in the title gets you memes about it, who woulda think?) And weirdly enough I got kinda attached to the joke bug baby in the video.....so Leni happened.

[Leni]

Leni Samsa (Her full name ig), is an oc made to be Gregor's daughter, she's around 5-6 years old,her name is not a reference to Mice and Men, don't ask me why I gave her Rodion's hair color (it was genuinely a coincidence and I might change her design a bit)and yes..Gregor did conceive her.

[How the fuc-]

Alright wow so..to explain in a way that doesn't have me speedrun getting banned; Leni was born asexually and is essentially a clone. In this au, at some point Old G Corp made it to where their soldiers could have eggs to create more soldiers that are stronger or plentiful, there were unfortunately many complications and said children would go on to suffer the effects of the war, they were aged rapidly and knew nothing but death and horror.

When Gregor had Leni, he didn't want the same fate to come for her and at the time he couldn't afford to look after her,so he hid her away with a couple who'd do so, despite them being disgusted by her, they still cared for the young nymph. They were then killed by a G corp veteran in an armed(💀) robbery, leaving her alone again.

[Baby on the Bus]

During Canto 1, while in the Backstreets, Gregor found Leni starving, cold and horrifed to find her surrogate parents dead. You can't just find a daycare while on the job, so he just..decided to bring her onto the bus and hope noooobody questions how a toddler who looks identical to you and is also a bug just happened to show up. If you've read my comics you know how well that went for him. (Also yes him not having his cigarettes in several drawings was intentional, don't smoke around babies 🚭)

[What will happen with Leni]

Honestly, I'm not entirely sure yet, this au was made as a joke originally to begin with. Honestly my biggest shock with all of this was that people actually like this au? Like- I effectively made a Gregor mpreg au and y'all were like "omg so cute! This shit is peak!", I'm kinda thankful for that and that people actually like my writing and artwork, even if it's a bit..unusual.

------

So that's about it, I'm still gonna keep developing on this au because my Gregor brainrot is still festering and I like exploring G corp lore. Thanks for reading this botched explanation 🥲👍

🪳🪳🪳

[dollypopup]

unpopular polin opinions (again)

-Colin honest to God didn't do anything even REMOTELY as bad as this fandom insists he did? framing him as the big bad in a friends to lovers story is deeply unsatisfying and pits him and Pen against each other when the whole POINT is that they're a team.

-Polin is meant to be ride or die. it's meant to be people who see one another for who they are beyond the front. it is NOT meant to be two people who hold grudges against one another with a scorecard of who hurt the other more huffing about how the other is frustrating. their whole dynamic is 'i like you' 'i like you, too'

-BOTH OF THEM have hurt the other without apology. NEITHER of them are actually in love with the other (yet). Both of them are closed off and secretive and neither of them should actually have to beg and cry and scream for forgiveness. they're supposed to be friends

-jealous Colin as we're pushing for it is a shit tier trope. Colin swooping in w/ feelings for Pen only after other people have expressed interest in her would always make her wonder if he wanted her for her or if he wanted her because someone else did first and that's not the dynamic at all. Colin falls for her organically, albeit slowly. He falls for her when she opens up, when she shows him who she is, and only after he shows her that he's a safe place to do so. Likewise, SHE falls for HIM for real when she sees who HE is, too. When she sees that he's imperfect and that his charming artifice is a mask he wears. They're both scared that who they truly are on the inside is unlovable or unworthy of serious consideration, and when they crack open and the other sees, they fall for who they actually are. It's a love made stronger because it's born out of trust and understanding, not out of an ultimatum of 'I could lose her!'

-Penelope ghosting Colin with no explanation after S2 would be her being a really bad friend and deeply hurtful

-Penelope would hate being the unofficial diamond everyone is seemingly rooting for and it makes 0 sense for her to suddenly have a bunch of suitors. it's just lazy storytelling.

-most of the Polin dynamics this fandom has actively rooted for in S3 is just Kanthony or Saphne 2.0. That's very much NOT the point of Polin's romance. and I do not understand why people want the exact same season playing out the THIRD TIME IN A ROW

-Pen's actual character would despise how some of y'all write about Colin. like. . .she's supposed to love him? he's supposed to love her? If someone called him an idiot or undeserving or uninteresting or that he should beg and grovel she would fight

-Polin's characterizations as individual characters as well as a couple have been so completely twisted and deformed in this fandom for the sake of drama and painfully cishet toxic tropes that it makes me legitimately sad. Polin is a great ship. So much of it is beautiful and healing. Two people who care for one another deeply, if with a good deal of confusion, discovering who they are individually and then realizing they're happiest with each other is lovely. Colin being an atypical male love interest in the sense that his primary draw is kindness and compassion and primary struggles being lost and jealous of his LI for her success is INTERESTING. There are a million and one brooding rakes out there breaking hearts and beating their chests howling 'she's mine!' in the middle of a room full of other men gawking. Ship Pen with one of them if you want that dynamic, but that's not Colin and I don't WANT it to be Colin. Colin is great without that

-Penelope is not an innocent lil bab who did everything she did out of good intentions. she is more complex and relatable as someone who fucks up. It is COMPELLING that she did deeply hurtful things not out of saintly altruism but out of jealousy or scorn or desperation mixed with a genuine desire to do well by those she cares for. It is a better story to acknowledge she isn't even remotely perfect and that in wanting to help, she just tangled things up even worse than before. Penelope has plenty of faults alongside her goodness: she's closed off, distrusting, traumatized, jealous. All whilst being funny, sharp, cunning, loving. She wants to be loved and to love those around her and doesn't know how. She hurts the people she cares about and she hurts herself in the process. THAT'S REAL. The idea that Penelope is a perfect bab who should be fawned over and all her ills can be excused away is flat and infantalizing. I understand: there have been a lot of criticisms of Penelope from people who genuinely dislike her character. But the pendulum has swung to the other side to the point where people who DO like her and DO ship Polin point out unsavory parts of her character, it's met with the same rabid defense as if we were haters. Guess what? I like Penelope MORE because she's made those fuck ups. I like discussing how she's hurt others because who of us haven't? Penelope is overlooked and unpopular and awkward and unsure and I LIKE HER FOR IT. I'm exhausted of the glittering, perfect Penelope who everyone else has to apologize to because she's the 'victim'. That makes her so much more unlikable

-speaking of unlikable, most of y'all who say you ship Polin straight up do not like Colin as a character. And it's obvious. Turning him into a character he isn't, wanting him on hands and knees begging for a second chance, considering him only as an extension of Penelope when he has so much richness as a character in his own right. Assuming the worst in his actions and striking out all the good about him in favor of a narrative that deforms Polin into a ship where he is always wrong and she is always right. And it turns a lot of people off to the ship. People who ship Polin already get turned off by how much this fandom hates Colin, let alone peeps just getting into it or outside of it. There are people who despise Polin that discuss Colin more favorably than we do in our own ship and it makes no sense because he is a genuinely fantastic character. He refuses to abide by toxic masculinity, he's gentle and sweet and caring, he's silly and unsure and self-sacrificing, he's putting on an act and he's self-critical and he's got such a big heart. He's the kindest person in Pen's life. He supports her unyieldingly. He's never done anything to purposefully hurt her and he cherishes her as a friend. Why do we so rarely talk about him favorably?

-Polin is NOT Colin vs. Penelope. That dynamic can create some interesting conflict, sure, but it needs to move beyond that because at the core? At the core, it's Polin vs. The Problem. and it's so much more fulfilling that way

[fdrsamericanflagduckfloaty]

Drop the Miku Binder TJ rant bestie

okay so like

i was just thinking about it, and, like, i think it's fucking nuts but also really weird how the hamilton fandom (which i'm in but i swear i'm not an uwu lams turtles shipper please) somehow took this CRUSTY, TERF-BANGED, UGLY, OLD, REDHEADED, RAPIST ASS MOTHERFUCKER,

and turned his ugly ass into this.

like damn what the hell- what- how???? okay like yeah, they're using daveed diggs as a base for this bullshit, which, okay, fine, but YOU DID NOT NEED TO ADD THE INFO. The idea itself is funny but also a bit weird, however im 99% sure Diggs himself wore that shirt. However, all of the extra info??? come on. Where'd the fandom get this istg y'all-

Also, also, they did something similar by making John Laurens (gay blonde dumbass) into an UWU turtles boy. ....why. Bi trash coffee gremlin tumblr over-worked sleep-deprived alexander hamilton. like yeah relatable but. why. small bean big sweater uwu innocent boy blushy short james madison. ...why. bro was stubborn and would pick a fight and was the 'fuck you' type of shy.

I just find it wild the fandom made this and it is the entirety of the fandom into one. There's the good sides, there's the bad, and there's this. Which encompasses the ENTIRE. FUCKING. FANDOM.

The fandom has its headcanons, it has its perks, but then you reach the side where everyone is just a wild fucking original character. They don't model the historical figures anymore- they're just OCs with the name 'Philip Hamilton' or 'John Laurens' or god forbid our third U.S president 'Thomas Jefferson' slapped onto it.

I'm also so confused as to how this is what the fandom is known for. We have some good fics, we have hella good art, we have a M U S I C A L , and then the first thought people have of the Ham fandom is Miku Binder Third President Founding Fucker Slaveowner Thomas Jefferson.

I also find it kind of offensive (almost put insluting oh my ufckjg-) that they made a founder become this but like he'd probably be really pissed so please keep fucking up his memory lmao he deserves it

But like... also why. What made them think of this.

Like yeah I write 20k word TR smut but you don't see me drawing it.

You don't see me making him an UWU e-boy.

...Eh I probably would for shits and giggles tbh

But like this is founding father Thomas Jefferson. Third Pres. Second VP. First Sec. of State. And he is a furry, ex-cocaine addict. Also btw do they mean John Laurens or John Adams as the former drug dealer part because neither are better but it'd really help

Also bro literally raped his 14 year old slave and had like 6 kids with her. He had her room DIRECTLY NEXT TO HIS. He RAPED HIS DEAD WIFE'S HALF-SISTER. AND HE'S A SAD UWU MAN WHO DID NOTHING WRONG?

Let's not forget this same person made a post saying Lizzie (the Queen) would be reincarnated as a horse when she died. I'm serious. Deadass.

However, it's also funny as fuck because this entire thing is a tarnish to Jefferson and I fucking HATE that bastard so like good job lol

At the same time though it's still super weird??? But insane??? Because how did this become one of the Tumblr exclusives??? like it's Tumblr history at this point. Twitter history. You cannot express any like for the Hamilton musical before you get the 'have you seen miku binder thomas jefferson' and it's like 'well shit'.

But also remember: THIS IS NOT AN OC TO FUCK AROUND WITH. Hamilton the Musical specifically gave you and presented you the founder. Thomas Jefferson. Played by Daveed Diggs. Just because it is played by a POC, but also modernized, and vastly different from the actual founder and President, does not mean that at its core it is NOT STILL THE SAME PERSON.

If you name it Thomas Jefferson, if you use the presentation of him given by Daveed Diggs, you are still using that white fucking slave-owning racist motherfucker, and that's the point of it all.

I find it stupid but funny but also insane, and I wouldn't care, unless I KNEW IT WAS SERIOUS. The artist made it seriously. They made John Laurens. They made Philip Hamilton. They did this seriously.

but like also look at this lmao

This meme of Thomas Jefferson in a Hatsune Miku binder really got trending on Twitter at one point

It's an infamous, hellish, classic meme of both Tumblr and the Hamilton fandom, and it deserves what attention it's got, but Jesus please never unironically make shit like this again, Hamilfans, we're stained by this we don't need another😭🔫

EDIT:

i have more

So like, I just remembered: it kinda romanticizes these guys??? The musical??? so like don't get me wrong i love the music but... it puts them into this light. This pink light. It paints Hamilton as an abolitionist who was outspoken about it. When, in reality, dude traded and sold slaves for his in-laws + wasn't all that outspoken about it + was against immigrants or migrants, WHEN DUDE WAS FROM THE ISLANDS. HE HAD SCOTTISH BLOOD. AND HE'S AGAINST IT? Hypocrisy at its finest.

Washington also owned slaves and ran his own plantation too, so he's not off the hook. Madison, the 'uwu small bean' of the fandom, also owned slaves and ran a plantation. So the main people of this entire fiasco are slave-owners. Perfect. But also I've heard Ron Chernow's book on Hamilton, the entire start of the musical, is a bit biased to Ham himself, so...

You could be saying 'but FDRsduckfloaty, Sally is mentioned!' yes. But however, not enough. Not more. It's not even implied more than potentially ONCE what he did, and I'm not sure it ever was! Cabinet battle 3 states it flat-out but it was cut. For your info, Ben Franklin and John Adams are the only two you can really like in the slavery aspect. Ben bought them but let them go for their freedom, and John detested slavery and was against it. Never owned one.

Jefferson did add a slavery clause to the declaration but it was discarded, and he didn't fight half as much as he could have. Maybe he did and since it was the 1700s he didn't have a lot of support, but surely he could've done something like, I don't know, call it out after his terms? Once you're done gaining your second term and out of office, they can't do shit to it or your presidency, since it's over.

So the musical itself has its own problem and the fandom is even worse. It blatantly disregards that a LOT. A hella lot of the amrev fandom + a small part of the ham fandom has called TJeffs out for it but I mean can we please not make shit like Miku Binder Jefferson and act like he wasn't an actual child rapist???

This video does pretty well at it. I will admit the tagline 'America then, told by America now' almost sends shivers down my spine for what it really means. But then again I find men not knowing they'd make it down into the history books for starting the world's global power and the world's economic powerhouse pretty interesting. Doing something big and knowing it's historical, but not that it's going to form a very, VERY large country, where you'll be honored down the road and called a Founding Father of an entire nation? Signing papers and not knowing they're the founding stones of a country and still looked up to today? Intriguing.

But like still fuck Thomas Jefferson lmao

there's a lot more videos on it that dig deep, but the point is, that Hamilton is a good musical with good songs but it's also very... complex, and a bit problematic, Thomas Jefferson is a little bitch, and you should stan 1776 before you ever stan Hamilton. 1776 does not do this. It is much more realistic. 1776 has Benjamin Franklin and that's an immediate win. Be more like a 1776, be less like a Hamilton.

[mugeesworld]

One Piece Fans Green & Red Flags!!

I seen someone do this on tiktok and thought I would do some of my takes😋 this is as a joke so don't take it to heart

Also these are HELLA specific so don't ask how I know I just do ok

Green

The one piece fans that are still in alabaster and instead of watching one piece they are scrolling on the tiktok # of it. +extra points if you're already doing fanart of them.

non binary luffy/chopper fans (quite silly people I enjoy your company. You probably have a saved collection of videos of cats with silly sounds. Don't lie to me ik you do)

Asexual Zoro and luffy fans

Platonic Nami and luffy shippers (ya know like brother sister dynamic)

Female plus size sanji fans (cough cough me. But I've seen all y'all out their. You freaky bitches)

Usopp fans (enough said)

People that love the usopp and Nami bestie duo.

Dadan fans (period)

People that make fanart of zoro and chopper being cute

People that draw robin with that one nose shape and also draw her like that one lady from criminal minds.

FROBIN SHIPPERS (RAHHHHH🔥🔥⁉️⁉️⁉️🗣️🗣️)

Trans men Franky fans (you started wearing button ups over t-shirts huh. Elite style and funny as hell)

Female Franky shippers (Bless y'all. Y'all my favs probably. Making the best edits I swear. Probably looking for a man's like Franky cause you kin robin)

LESBIAN NAMI FANS (PLEASE LOVE ME ALL Y'ALLS COSPLAYS BE EATING SO HARD BABES)

Nami x Vivi shippers (yeah😋)

Introverted female robin fans (hit my line)

Female buggy fans

Trans men zoro fans

FEMALE OR TRANS MASC WHITEBEARD STAN'S (very rare to come across. Y'all great but y'all need to heal your dad issues)

People that don't leave out Franky, jinbei, and brook in writing stuff

People that write for Franky in general.(he needs more love)

Marco simps (brave soliders right here. You really picked that mf? Yeah me you. IT'S ABOUT PERSONALITY OK???)

Sanji fans that actually find his training arc fun and not gross

Female Mihawk stans (naughty gal😼 you like them cold)

You know what?! Any trans masc one piece fan that picked a character and was like. Yep! He's literally me! Im literally him!

Jinbei fans (you guys are either sweethearts or middle school boys(the mean kind)

Brook fans that do fanart. (See cause y'all gonna eat every time)

Bon clay fans that actually like him and don't just make fun of him.

I forgot his name. Umm Coby? I think? Yeah Coby fans.

Rayleigh simps (insert sound *I'm so hungry I could eat at Arby's! She really is hungry!* Me too girl me too.)

Same for garp ^

The people that been making the shanks love actions edits 😋

People that make corecore/hopecore edits of one piece

Ik I've said it a bunch but the drawing community that has been carrying the one piece fandom on tiktok. (Ty for blessing us)

Plus size one piece fans +points if you cosplay

That hot old lady that took chopper in and the hot old lady with Rayleigh fans. (Those two would be such good friends and serve some major cunt. Drawers! Get to it you know what to do.)

Red

Sanji and zoro fans that ARE CONSTANTLY BICKERING IN COMMENT SECTIONS ABOUT POWER LEVELS AND BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH SHUT UP

People that feel the need to tell sanji fans about Fishman Island every chance they get as if other characters don't have their red flags. I said it.

That one person in every comment section with a luffy profile pics saying the most absolutely rude or embarrassing thing ever like "post the on IG reels" (you are immature and not in a good way like luffy)

Zoro fans that's also like Patrick Bateman for the wrong reason

"Yamato is a woman" ("we'll actually Oda said 🤓" EHHHHHHHH *family Feud buzzered noise.* GET OUT)

People that shit on the one piece live action cast. (specifically the ones complaining about nami and her sister. BOY I OTTA!)

People that talk shit about big mom just cause she fat. Like babes so is your mom....

People that still watch one piece and try to say how much they love it but are racist, homophobic, transphobic. When one of the biggest things for luffy is to not be judgemental. You are not him⁉️🗣️ you are a asssss

Akianu fans.

MOST black beard fans (I ain't forgiving no one for what he did to whitebeard I'm not hearing it)

"Zoro would kill the whole crew for luffy🤓" would you kill your whole friend group/family for your best friend/mom or dad..... I didn't think so.

People that hate on English dub watchers. I'm a slow reader y'all. Plus it's hella funny.

People that weren't at least a little mad about GARPS actions in marine ford.

Nami x luffy. Robin x Law. And robin x zoro shippers. Also Any gross illegal ones with gross age gaps.

Thats all I can think of right now!

[kafkaoftherubble]

做工前肯定要讲几句有关249的事: 憂太的 领域展开

// I Must Talk About c249 Before I Work: On Yuta's Domain Expansion

This post contains spoilers for Chapter 249 of Jujutsu Kaisen.

If I don't dump it here, these thoughts will distract me later! I'm already very distracted lately! Too distracted for my own good! Ahhhhh!

First off, I was eating so good. Yuta fans, simps, appreciators, and Rika (good taste, y'all)—rejoice, for this chapter is basically 95% Yuta! That's right; the next 5% was Yuta's Eyebags!

Look at this! He's so cute! So handsome!

Oh, I have to learn to exorcise spirits now. Then I can kick that fake Rika away and become his Rika!

Also, some people are somehow even more handsome just by being shown slow breathing. Is it just me who thinks that? Or is this what "rizz" truly means? I mean, look at that slight frown! Look at those eyebags! Look at him breathing!

... I'm sorry. I'm usually not one to write something with such trifling, substanceless content.

It's just... Yuta, man.

Anyway, the main point. Please, look at Yuta's

Domain Expansion

Shit is so magnificent. The many swords are obviously the first thing one would notice (and all that joke about Unlimited Blade Works and that Bleach... thing), but it's the abundance of crosses and the knots behind them that attracted my attention.

I'll get the easy out of the way first.

The Crosses

I would suspect these are meant to be "gravestones." Not too hard to think of "till death do us part," right? Though, to be fair, death didn't do Yuta and Rika part. In fact, it strengthened Yuta's split-moment craving for Rika and cursed her—in true dukkha fashion—into something quite macabre.

If one's Domain is the extension of their mental-scape, then it makes sense that Yuta's would incorporate gravestones, since his genesis as a cursed energy user effectively began on the day Rika died.

----

The Knots

Now this is the part that attracted the most of my attention!

Japanese knot-tying traditions are largely influenced by Chinese knotting (中国结) [1]. The word for knots in Chinese, 结, means "to bind," which then comes to represent all kinds of "union." Marriage, for example, is 结婚 (hanzi) /結婚 (kanji) [2][3]. Given Yuta's "love" motif, you can already see why the knots are part of his Domain.

There are plenty of meanings for the word 结, inter alia, it's a pun on 吉 (blessed) [2][3]. The fact that these knots are intertwined also comes to represent "interdependence," "connection," and "bonds." [2]

It's a bit of a stretch, admittedly, but I suppose one could probably draw this to that time Yuta described himself as "blessed." He is blessed because he was loved—he is enriched by connections and bonds with other people.

-

What is the knot type in Yuta's domain, then?

There are two candidates I could find.

I always rank each possibility from the highest confidence level to the lowest, so here goes. Note that I'm using the Chinese name (I would love it if someone added a more Japanese-focused viewpoint in this post on a reblog. I'm much more familiar with Chinese and cannot read Japanese, so...):

(1) 双钱结, The Double Coin Knot, 淡路結び [1]

It's shaped like two copper coins that are intertwined, hence its blessing is largely related to fortune and money [2][4].

However, the pronunciation of 钱 ("money") is similar to 全, "whole." Meanwhile, there is a pair of coins in this knot. This gives 双钱 an alternative reading—双全, "a pair that makes the whole." It also means 好事成双, "good things come in pairs." [4][5]

Yuta, as a jujutsu sorcerer, is more of a pair than an individual—he fights with Rika and is connected to her. These two together make a whole. A force of good that comes in a pair.

Due to sturdy enough sources corroborating the meaning of this knot, the similarity in appearance to Yuta's Knot, as well as the very fitting "pair + whole" symbolism, I have a higher confidence in this knot being the one in Yuta's Domain.

(2) 八字结, The “Figure 8�� Knot

It's a pretty dime-a-dozen knot where the number 8 is formed. It has pragmatic purposes (eg. rock climbing), but here, because these two loops are intertwined, it apparently means "honest love" and "unchanging friendship." [6]

I rank this knot as lower in confidence level. It does at least pertain to the motif of love, according to one source, but it doesn't resemble Yuta's knot quite as well as the Double Coin Knot.

A bit of a caveat, in the spirit of intellectual honesty and rigor: The meaning of this knot has been found in only one source (see Citation #6), and it doesn't actually pass my internal rigor test. I've tried to search for corroboration from Chinese sources, but no dice. The only site in Chinese that corroborates the meaning of "eternal love" has busted web certificates and links.

----

The Name of Yuta's Domain Expansion

The translated name by OP Scan is terrible. It certainly pays homage to Yuta's fame (infamy?) as "The War God of Pure Love," but the actual kanji is 真贋相愛。

真 - Truth or real

贋 - False or fake

相愛 - mutual love, or reciprocal love, or "in love."

真贋 literally means "truth and false. Together it usually means "veracity." Here though? I'd interpret it as "The (Mutual) Love Between The Real and The False."

Isn't this shit metal as fuck? I mean, it's also fucking poetry. Truly the kind of magnificence only one with premium quality eyebags could provide!

It's worth nothing that 真贋 itself makes a contrasting pair, which again, links back to the Double Coin Knot's meaning.

I'm sure yall can make your own interpretation of what 真贋相愛 could symbolize vis-a-vis Yuta and Rika. Let's go, people!

----

Tangents to My Research - Side Dish

Knots have come to be a very important symbol of relationships, especially love, since the Tang and Song Dynasty [1]. To draw to the Japanese side of the practice, Chinese knotting practice reaches Japan during the Tang Dynasty as well [1]. It's not too surprising that this love connotation could also have been passed to Japan.

The entangling property of knots also comes to mind the term "连理（枝）", which means "interlocking (tree branches)." Here are two poems referring to the word:

(1) 同心结缕带，连理织成衣. —By Luo Binwang (骆宾王)

We tie this ribbon into a concentric knot, and we turn our interlocking branches (of love)into our clothes. Translation mine.

(2) 在天愿作比翼鸟，在地愿为连理枝 —By Bai Juyi (白居易）

In heaven, I want to become a Biyi Bird (with you). On earth, I want to be (a mesh of) interlocking branches (with you). Translation mine.

The Biyi Bird is a mythological bird recorded in the purely fantastical geographical treatise, The Classics of the Mountain and Seas (《山海经》). The bird is born with only one eye and one wing on one side. To fly, it needs a partner with the other eye and wing of the other side—and the two will fly together as a complement. [7]

It's very lovey-dovey and romantic and shit.

...Damn, Yuta is really all about love and connection, isn't he?

----

Wow, I didn't work on my actual job at all. Because I deadass spend hours just on this. Seriously?

But then again, there has been a precedence to me breaking my lackadaisical attitude toward writing JJK-related things—and that is when it concerns my favorite character. You don't need to click on the link to know who that other one is; it was Gojo Satoru.

Yuta, bless his rizz, deserves all of my time. If he dies (NO FUCKING WAY, GEGE!!!), then at least I have made something of worth about him.

Thank you for reading my ramble!

---- ----- ------

Citations:

"Chinese knotting" from Wikipedia

"中国结的历史来历和寓意" ("The history and meaning of the Chinese knotting") from 妍妍旅行记 on Sohu.com (in Chinese)

"Chinese Knots, Winding the Best Wishes with Cords" by Beijing Tourism

"双钱结寓意和象征，双钱结编法" ("The meaning and symbolism of the Double Coin Knot; How to Make a Double Coin Knot") on 结艺网 www.zhongguojie.org (in Chinese)

双色绳的编法有哪些？("Whast are the ways to make knots using two different colors?") on Zhihu (in Chinese)

"19 Popular Types of Chinese Knots and Their Meanings" on AnyofChina

"比翼鸟" from Wikipedia (in Chinese; English page not created)

There are also other links embedded in the ramble; these are references for that one specific instance and so do not warrant their inclusion under this section.

[blackjackkent]

oh my god, I want to hear all about Hec and Karlach married hahahaha

More Hec/Karlach content, you say? :D :D

Y'all spoil me tremendously with this sort of encouragement. XD

(This is a response to my tag novel on this post about what people's Tavs/Durges would wear to their wedding.)

I really s2g I am going to write this Avernus fic at some point which I fully intend to be a longish collection of one-shots eventually leading to Karlach and Hector having a happily-ever-after which would include all this. (I have the first chapter of another Jaheira-related fic in the cooker rn and then the Avernus fic's first chapter will be up next; I'm trying to rotate my longfics a bit. XD ) So... this is all obviously subject to change based on how that fic eventually plays out.

However, with this minute bit of prompting I will indulge myself in some weapons-grade Hector/Karlach Fluff anyway. :D This is less a full fic and more some random snippets/headcanons about them getting married and afterwards.

-----

They have a first official "commitment" to each other, sometime after arriving in Avernus. Once they're safely installed in the House of Hope as their headquarters and start settling in for the long-haul war against Zariel, they take some time to themselves in an abandoned wing of the building and make private vows to each other. (Think something like this scene from Aerie's romance in ToB.) Neither of them calls it a marriage, but deep down they both know they mean it just as strongly.

It's kind of a tossup that they will leave Avernus until right before they do; their several years of guerilla warfare in the Hells culminates in a massive multipart raid on Zariels' main headquarters; Zariel is killed along with a number of her main lieutenants, and the group gets away with a defecting infernal blacksmith and blueprints for upgrades to Karlach's heart that will allow her to finally return home.

(It's Cespenar. The infernal blacksmith is Cespenar. @rhysintherain generously donated this idea and I'm not letting go of it. XD )

Their first few weeks back in the Material Plane are spent reconnecting with friends, finding a place to live in the city, and generally being a bit shell-shocked that they actually made it out, but eventually they start trying to make real plans for the future.

They're both huge saps, and Karlach has been denied so many traditional life events because of her time in the Hells, so even though they're basically already married, Hector definitely makes a big deal out of the proposal. He STUDIES the subject deeply to try and do it right, combing through all of Baldur's Gates libraries for examples of romantic gestures, and enlists Wyll's help.

(Wyll has shipped them aggressively this whole time and is super excited about the romance of it all. I haven't decided on the details of who, but he also got involved with someone during their time in the Hells so he's not alone either, bc Wyll deserves nice things to happen to him also. <3)

With Wyll's help, Hector arranges a trip outside the city to an inn that sits on a very tall hilltop. He does his "official" proposal while they're having a picnic at a spot that has a beautiful view of the entire city, from the Outer City on in. It's super romantic and they're both giant saps about it. They both cry. (And then have sex behind some nearby bushes in a lovestruck haze.)

They don't really plan a huge ceremony. Mostly it's about having all their friends there (even dragging Lae'zel back from the Astral), and making the same commitment publicly that they made privately years earlier.

Karlach becomes oddly nervous about it as the event draws closer. She has a very slight superstitious streak and is still after all these years gunshy of how her life went so fast to shit all at once, and part of her feels like making it "official" is asking for something bad to happen. Hector spends a lot of time being comforting and reassuring her.

They have a night wedding. This is Karlach's idea - she knows Hector has missed the moonlight and its associated connection with Selune in all the time they've spent in the Hells, even though he'd never complain about it, so she ensures that their wedding will be under the night sky on a night when the moon will be full or near so.

He insists, as a counterpoint, that she picks the location - she decides on a place in the Outer City near where she grew up, against the water.

Father Enric, the Abbot from Hector's monastery, travels to the city to officiate. There's no best man/maid of honor concept, but all of their companions from the Absolute adventure are lined up as part of the ceremony, as well as a few friends made during the campaign in Avernus.

The ringbearer is Buddy the owlbear, bearing the rings very carefully on a pillow resting on his head.

Wyll and Shadowheart take the lead on dressing the couple, neither of whom have the faintest clue how to put together an ensemble. (I spent way too long getting these screenshots so please appreciate how pretty my babies look. XD )

Karlach, contrary to all expectations, really enjoys getting gussied up in a dress and looking pretty; it's not an everyday thing for her but she enjoys it. Hector, conversely, feels INCREDIBLY out of his element in the fancy jacket Wyll arranges for him. Wyll teases him quite a bit about it while they're waiting for the ceremony to start.

The absolute cutest part of the whole ceremony, by unanimous vote from everyone present, is that they do the whole thing where the bride and groom aren't supposed to see each other before the ceremony. Jaheira and Shadowheart hang out with Karlach helping her get ready, and Wyll and Halsin hang out with Hector, and both groups report back later that their charges repeatedly tried to escape custody to go find each other early.

When Hector does finally see her as the ceremony is starting, he goes completely slackjawed and just stares at her like he cannot believe his luck.

Karlach forgets her lines halfway through the vows and just kisses him anyway. Hector remembers them all perfectly (of course) - he just forgets to speak when it's his turn because he's so busy looking at her with the biggest puppy dog eyes. He keeps trying to go for his usual super-composed vibe and just failing utterly.

All in all it's just a massive sap-fest. Both of them feel like they've earned it, though, after everything they've been through. (Hector does feel a little embarrassed that Enric sees him acting like such a dope and not showing any of his usual self-discipline. Enric thinks it's sweet though.)

They have a big party at a local tavern afterwards, one Karlach hung out at as a teenager all the time. The innkeeper still remembers her and gives them drinks on the house and everyone gets sloshed off their asses. Hector and Karlach try to dance and both of them are pretty not great at it but neither seems to much care.

They get back home at about four in the morning, still trashed. Both of them are exhausted and ready to fall asleep at a moment's notice, but Karlach mumbles something jokingly about not wanting to miss out on her wedding night. So they end up kind of curling up together and having drowsy, tipsy, super-soft sex, drifting in and out of sleep, extremely happy.

Neither of them really can think of anywhere they'd rather be, nor do they have a day job to take a vacation from, so they don't really have a honeymoon. But nobody sees hide nor hair of them after the ceremony for a good week. XD

Bonus nose squish kiss:

[msviolacea]

I've been following the Hugo Awards fiasco very closely the last week or so - I've been to two Worldcons, and have sat through several days of business meetings at each one of them. (One was in Kansas City, which was when the rules that would hinder the Sad Puppies were under debate/vote, and the other was in Chicago to support the idea of the video game writing award.) And I can say that the experience was fascinating, and I probably got more out of it than I would have gotten out of panels I could have attended at that time ... which is not entirely a compliment to the system or the people who run it. It's not entirely an insult either; mostly, I learned a lot about a) navigating very political settings, b) the structure of Robert's Rules of Order, and c) what the population of people who care about Worldcon (and have the money to attend Worldcon) really think of fandom outside of their bubble.

This post isn't about the actual Hugo debacle - if anyone's missed that and is curious, this expose at File 770 is a good starting point. And this isn't about the disturbing bent of Sinophobia that comes with a lot of the community's reaction, other people have made those points about how blaming the specter of "Chinese censorship" takes deserved blame off the North Americans who made all these terrible decisions.

Mostly this is about Worldcon in general, and the scope of it. There's an exchange in one of the more recent File 770 posts where someone who helps run an anime convention asks a very good question about why the Worldcon community is so adamantly anti-corporate sponsorship. Acknowledging that what happened in China was terribly done, this person basically makes the point that a) conventions are EXPENSIVE to run and b) anime conventions have been proving for years that there is a halfway decent balance to be had between having something run for fans, by fans and taking some money from well-vetted corporate entities to help offset the costs and improve the experience for all.

Y'all, the reactions from some of the regulars there make it sound like this person is suggesting holding a convention at an Amazon warehouse.

And that, I think, is the main crux of this particular part of the matter. Worldcon wants to be the exact same type of convention as it was in 90s, 80s, 70s, and earlier - only bigger, and still attracting younger people to keep it going. But they also don't want to introduce the type of things that younger fans are interested in without a lot of kicking and screaming. They want to be a purely literary convention, which is fine. They want their version of literary to be a very narrow type of speculative fiction, written in the same formats as it always has been, in the same venues as it always has been. They want art created by people who can afford to be full-time artists by selling to the same type of venues as artists sold to in decades past. They want comics only if they're put together in neat printed graphic novels and sold by a publisher. They want SFF to continue looking exactly like it always has, and if they accept change, it's in very small, incremental movements that are opposed by the kicking and screaming parties who weaponize Robert's Rules at the Business Meeting.

(Seriously y'all, the disrespect dripping off those people when, in Chicago, one of my friends dared to try to suggest that maybe the rules for Fan Artist shouldn't exclude people who make money on Patreon, and that maybe someone who makes a few hundred a month on Patreon shouldn't have to compete with artists who draw for Marvel and DC or create book covers for major publishers for Professional Artist ... it was dumb as shit.)

But hey, if they want a convention that looks like it would have looked in 1992, great, that's their business. If they want something that will appeal to their specific friend group and anyone who might want to be like them, without expanding or working to appeal to audiences whose media habits have changed with the changing technological times, then that's a valid choice. It's not one I want to be a part of again, if so, but it's a valid choice. But also, I've heard/read things from conrunners about how fucking brutal it is to try to do, how much things cost - hotels, convention space, supplies, et cetera, and that doesn't even get into the idea of paying the artists/authors/creators who become the advertisement and draw of the convention, because this particular group of people (the ones who are acting like the idea of sponsorships are the equivalent of killing your dog) also tend to be the same sort of people who think that the honor and ~exposure~ of being a guest at a convention should be good enough for creators. But the fact is, no, not even charging attendees $100-$200 a pop is going to pay for a medium to large convention. So how do you get that money? Beg for donations? Throw fundraisers? Rely on conrunners being well-off enough to throw in their own money because they just love the thing so much? How do you expect these conventions in cities worth traveling to to pay for themselves? I don't run cons because I certainly don't have the answers and don't want to be the person who has to figure them out, but I have a lot of respect for those who do and manage to do so without, say, doing all that. *gestures to the File 770 link above* But I would be very willing to bet that if you polled a bunch of local conrunners - the kind who run conventions that aren't put on by Wizard World, etc - most of them would say they'd happily accept money from sponsors as long as those sponsoring companies didn't actively go against the general ethos of the con's audience. Because, like it or not, that's where the money is.

But anyway. That's a lot of words about an institution that continues to tell me, in words and deed, that the kind of fan I am is not the kind of fan they want to attract. And I'm a relatively affluent middle-aged white woman, I suspect I'm closer to the person they want to attract than many, many others.

... having said that, I'm leaning towards going to Seattle in 2025, because despite everything I've been part of the SFF con community since the early 90s and still care about it in some way, and will probably sit in on part of the business meeting to try to push against the winds of sentiment and inertia once again. But I'll also be giving money and attention to some of the alternate awards out there that feel like they're attempting to reflect the actual 21st century state of the SFF genre. We'll see what happens.

[fantasycorrupted-a]

I'll be gone, hopefully about a month, possibly more. TL;DR just the usual isht, frustrated & tired, going on a break.

Y'all probably noticed my activity dipping. You must be tired of hearing me talk about my retake (sorry about that :'/). Well preparing for a job hunt (and a catch) is why I've been gone. I wasted a lot of time with no work because I'm an idiot and I'll be trying to catch up.

That aside I've been feeling shitty about writing. I still think I'm not portraying my characters properly, like they're just not fleshed out enough. Not themselves enough. They don't work as they should outside of their stories. And despite this I tried to take on canon characters again (from F.ar C.ry) knowing my inspiration for that would die just as fast as that for all the other canons I've had (damn you ADHD!). And here I am. Just disappointing myself.

(Another aside, but I recently made a bunch of changes to characters that I don't know if I like and can reverse, and how. Not sure how I'm feeling about them. And I've said before that I feel like I'm not writing Fiann properly. Fiann was a morally grey character, and she doesn't easily do friends at all but I can't bring that point across. I can't write villains lol. I have no idea what to do with this character anymore; same goes for the Corbeaus' and Hella's stories. Hell not even short stories are as easy as they used to. I hate writing.)

Maybe turning these blogs into ask blogs like what people used to have back in the day might kickstart inspiration... Then again I don't know. It's likely my inspiration will come back but it's been returning and then leaving so quickly recently that I don't want to rely on it. Or maybe it's just a year of letting go of shit. I turned my back on friendships that weren't making me feel okay at all in the long run and right now writing is doing the same to me. I may not stop writing forever, I can't give that up. Or drawing. It doesn't feel like I've gotten any better at either over these (almost) 2 years. And don't get me started on how I abandoned Arvid. I'm sad about that.