#y'all are everything to me I hope you know.

[aliyahwritings]

THE CONTRACTED HEART — Rafe Cameron (10)

MASTERLIST | Basketball Player & Supermodel!Female Reader

Summary: Rafe Cameron, a basketball star, needs a marriage to fix his image, while Model!Reader needs one for citizenship. They may be the perfect solution for each other.

Warnings: smut, descriptions of violence, jealousy, usage of drugs, talks about body image/ed, angst, and lots of bickering. Reader is confident, a people-pleaser, has a traumatic past, and is a sunshine with an attitude. Rafe is a whore, possessive, cocky, and secretive about his past.

Word Count: 8.7k

Aliyah's Notes: another long chapter!!!! had a bit of an issue with this chapter. didn't know where to go, and how to finish it but i'm pretty satisfied with the ending... hope y'all will feel that way too #scared

You were going to throw up.

It was 6 in the morning, and your apartment was filled with a pre-party energy—Aisha fluttering around checking final details, making sure everything was perfect for you. But for you, the weight of the day felt unbearable. The engagement party was only a few hours away, and you were supposed to feel excited, but instead, all you could feel was anxiety.

You stood in front of the full-length mirror, staring at your reflection as the fabric of your saree clung to your skin. It was a beautiful one—pale yellow with blue hues, simple, elegant. But as you looked at yourself, all you saw were flaws. Your stomach, the slight curve of your hips, your arms felt weird. Every inch of you felt exposed, like you were wearing your insecurities on display for the world to see. The saree that was supposed to make you feel confident now felt like a prison, the tightness around your chest suffocating you.

You tugged at the fabric, your fingers trembling as your heart raced in your chest. “I don’t know, Aish,” you said, your voice faltering. “I just… I don’t think I can do this.”

Aisha, who had been running around your place, stopped and turned to you with a frown, concern written all over her face. “Y/N, you look perfect. Rafe is going to love it, I swear. You look incredible, seriously.”

But her words didn’t reach you. They never did. They didn’t fix the sinking feeling in your stomach, the pit that had been growing since you woke up. You didn’t feel incredible. You felt like a mess. Like a lie. You felt like you didn’t belong in this world of glitz and glamour, not when the weight of your own past was pressing down on you.

You turned back to the mirror, avoiding her gaze, and exhaled shakily. “It’s not about Rafe,” you said, barely above a whisper, as if the words were too heavy to say aloud. “It’s… it’s everything. Everyone.”

She didn’t speak at first, but you could hear her footsteps approach slowly, her presence gentle and calm as she stood beside you. “What do you mean?”

“They’re not here,” you murmured, swallowing back the lump in your throat. “My family—they haven’t been here. They don’t care.”

The words slipped out before you could stop them, and so did the tears running down your face. You quickly wiped them away, trying to maintain some sort of control, but it was useless. The reality of it all hit you like a tidal wave.

Aisah’s expression softened, and she placed a hand on your shoulder. “Look, I know it’s tough, but you left for a reason. They treated you like an animal—you were nothing to them and look at you now. You have everything you want, you’re surrounded by people who love you, and you’re engaged to an amazing guy.”

“But you don’t get it,” your voice broke. “I haven’t spoken to them in years, Aisha. I haven’t heard from them since… you know… My Amma and Appa… they’ve never cared to fix what happened. And now they’re not here for this huge moment. They’re not here for me. And I just feel… I feel like none of this matters without them.”

You could feel the tightness in your chest grow, a heavy weight pressing down on your chest. Every time you thought about them—your parents, your siblings—it felt like the world was falling apart again. All the years of silence, the anger, the bitterness, the feeling of being abandoned… it was all still there, festering under the surface. You couldn’t help but wonder if you were always going to feel like the outsider, the one who wasn’t good enough for their love.

Aisha watched you quietly for a moment before speaking again, her voice softer. “Y/N, I know this isn’t easy. But this isn’t about your family. This is about you and the life you’re building. You’re so much more than your past, and tonight you get to shine. You’re not doing this for them. You’re doing it for you.”

You closed your eyes, letting her words sink in. You still feel the weight of it all, but as Aisha gave you one last reassuring look, you felt a small spark of resolve. Maybe you didn’t feel perfect. Maybe you never would. But tonight, you would step into this new chapter of your life, for you, and not for anyone else.

“You’re right,” you whispered, putting on a fake-ish smile. “Let me get over this. There’s too much to do today.”

The hours before the engagement party moved in a blur of preparations, but the nerves clung to you like an unwelcome guest. After Aisha helped you steady yourself, you dove into the checklist for the day, hoping to lose your anxieties in the bustle. Your hairdresser and makeup artist arrived promptly, transforming your apartment into a whirlwind of brushes, palettes, and fabric draping.

Despite the chaos, you couldn’t help but glance at your phone every few minutes, the screen lighting up teasingly with messages from Rafe. He’d been training all morning, but somehow still found the time to send you a steady stream of texts.

Rafe: Do you think this party will have snacks? Asking for a hungry basketball player.

You: There’s a buffet, Rafe. You’ll survive.

Rafe: Buffet doesn’t count. I want something good, like that thing you brought over the other day.

You: If you’re fishing for more biryani, the answer is no.

Rafe: Wow, first you take my penthouse, now you refuse me food? This marriage is starting off rocky.

You: This marriage hasn’t even started yet.

The exchange brought a smile to your lips despite yourself. He had this way of teasing that felt like a lifeline at the moment.

“Are you blushing?” Aisha teased from where she was meticulously laying out your jewelry.

“What? No,” you said, far too quickly. “Why would I even be blushing? You’re nuts… absolutely… absolutely nuts…”

“Oh my fucking God! You are!” she said with a grin, leaning in to glance at your phone. You pulled it away before she could peek at the screen, but the damage was done. “God, it’s so cute how he makes you smile like that.”

“You’re actually insane,” you mumbled, heat creeping up your neck.

She only laughed, clearly enjoying herself. “Denial is a river in Egypt, babe.”

You rolled your eyes but couldn’t stop your lips from twitching into a small grin. Rafe sent another message.

Rafe: So, what are you wearing?

You hesitated for a moment before replying.

You: Why? Thinking of copying my outfit?

Rafe: Maybe. But only if it’s good.

You: It’s a saree. Pale yellow with blue embroidery.

Rafe: Does it have one of those drapey things?

You: Yes, Cameron. That’s literally what makes it a saree!!!

Rafe: Got it. Drapey thing = saree. Send me a picture.

You didn’t respond, setting your phone down and pretending to focus on your makeup.

“Your husband?” Aisha asked, noticing your sudden quiet.

“Future husband,” you corrected with a finger up. “And obviously.”

“What’d he say?”

“He wants a picture.”

“Send him one. He’ll probably lose his mind. And let’s be real—you could use the ego boost.”

You shook your head, laughing despite yourself. Aisha wasn’t wrong. The way Rafe looked at you sometimes—or even texted you—had a way of making you feel like you were the most important person in the room. 

The hairdresser finished with your slicked half-up half-down hairstyle. Aisha brought over the jewelry: delicate gold bangles, matching earrings, and a necklace that felt heavy against your collarbones.

“Perfect,” Aisha said, stepping back to admire the finished look.

You glanced at your reflection in the mirror. The saree hugged you gracefully, the embroidery catching the light with every movement. The makeup brought a glow to your skin, and the hair framed your face perfectly. For the first time all day, you felt... good. 

Before you could overthink it, you picked up your phone and snapped a quick selfie—just enough to show the saree and the soft smile playing on your lips.

You: Fine. Here.

The reply came almost instantly.

Rafe: ...You’re killing me here.

Your heart skipped a beat at the simplicity of the words.

Rafe: Thank you brown people for existing, and making you. Rafe: Truly humanity owes them. Rafe: Forget the engagement party. Let’s just elope.

You laughed out loud, shaking your head.

You: Not happening. See you tonight.

His response made your stomach flutter in the strangest way.

Rafe: Can’t wait to become your fiancé, sweetheart.

The car rolled to a stop in front of the venue, its soft hum fading into the gentle buzz of the world outside. Through the tinted windows, you could see flashes of light—camera shutters capturing every moment like hunters seeking prey. The glow spilling from the venue, golden and inviting, felt overwhelming, almost oppressive. It danced off the grand arches of the villa, the soft flicker of string lights crisscrossing the courtyard casting a magical glow on the scene.

For a moment, you sat frozen, your fingers clutching the delicate fabric of your saree. It was meant to represent happiness, a tie to your heritage that should have brought you pride. But tonight, it felt more like a shackle, reminding you of the pieces of yourself you’d lost along the way.

“You okay?” Aisha’s voice came softly from beside you, laced with the familiar tone of concern that only she could carry so effortlessly. She looked radiant in her pale pink dress.

“Yeah… I… I’m fine,” you replied, the lie clumsy on your tongue.

Aisha raised an eyebrow, clearly unconvinced but deciding to let it slide. The car door opened, and she stepped out first, her head held high as though she didn’t care about anything—and knowing Aisha, she probably really didn’t care. When she turned to offer you her hand, her expression softened—a silent gesture of reassurance. You took it hesitantly, forcing your legs to carry you out of the car.

The cool evening air brushed against your skin, but it wasn’t enough to soothe the heat in your chest. Cameras clicked relentlessly, their flashes a blinding assault as the whispers began to ripple through the crowd.

“She’s a bit late.”

“She looks beautiful.”

“Why didn’t Rafe escort her out?”

“What is she wearing?”

Each word clawed at you, threatening to unravel the carefully constructed image you wore like an armor. You kept your head down, focusing on the rhythmic click of your heels against the gravel path as you made your way toward the villa’s entrance. The towering structure loomed over you, its ivy-draped walls and ornate carvings reminiscent of a bygone era. The cascading floral arrangements, all in deep crimson and soft pink hues.

Everything added to the suffocating pressure weighing on your chest.

Inside, the air buzzed with laughter and conversation as guests began to fill the sprawling garden. Long tables stretched across the courtyard, their surfaces glimmering with candles and vases bursting with fresh blooms. Everything was picturesque, perfect. Yet, all you could feel was a rising sense of dread.

“I need a minute,” you whispered to Aisha, not waiting for her reply before walking rapidly inside the villa.

You navigated the winding hallways with purpose, your steps quick but unsteady. You needed to escape—to find a quiet corner where the world’s eyes couldn’t follow, where you could let the overwhelming storm inside you settle, even just for a moment. The getting-ready room—it was the perfect refuge, a place to breathe and gather yourself before you faced the crowd again.

But as you rounded the corner, your steps faltered.

Rafe was there.

He leaned against the doorframe with an ease that felt infuriatingly effortless, his hands tucked casually into the pockets of his tailored white suit. The soft lighting played tricks with the lines of his face, his tousled hair looking as if it had been styled by the wind itself. The open collar of his shirt gave him an air of nonchalance that made him seem untouchable—except for the flicker of something warm in his eyes as he met your gaze.

“You planning to bolt already?” he teased, a crooked smile playing on his lips. His voice, low and smooth, carried the same blend of humor and arrogance that had always annoyed you.

You stopped, caught off guard. “What are you doing here?” you asked, your voice sharper than you intended.

Rafe pushed off the doorframe, taking a slow step toward you. “Waiting for you,” he said, his gaze dragging deliberately over your saree. His smile deepened as his eyes met yours again. “You look beau—”

“Rafe, I can’t do this,” you blurted, your voice trembling as the words spilled out before you could stop them.

The smile faded from his face, replaced by an expression of concern. “Why? What’s wrong?”

“Everything,” you said, your voice breaking. “The people, the cameras, the party—it’s all too much.”

Rafe’s brow furrowed as he stepped closer, his movements slow, deliberate. “You’ve done this a hundred times before,” he said softly. “What’s different now?”

You hesitated. “It’s not important,” you muttered, hoping he’d let it go. 

But Rafe wasn’t one to back down easily.

“Y/N,” he said softly, his voice steady but insistent. “Talk to me.”

You sighed, the lump in your throat growing heavier. “It’s stupid, okay? I’m just… I’m not used to this.”

“That’s not true.”

Your jaw tightened, and you looked away, your voice dropping to a whisper. “They’re not here.”

“Who?”

The question made you flinch, but you kept your response measured, your tone distant. “No one. It doesn’t matter.”

Rafe stepped closer, his presence grounding but not invasive. “It matters if it’s upsetting you.”

“It’s just… my family. We’re not close anymore, okay? And moments like this just remind me of that. But it’s fine. Whatever.”

His eyes softened, but you couldn’t bring yourself to say more. The details of your fractured relationship with your parents, the abuse, the years of silence—it wasn’t something you wanted to unpack here, not with him. You hated being this exposed, hated feeling so small under the weight of it all.

Rafe’s expression shifted, the concern in his eyes deepening. Slowly, he reached out, his hand brushing against your arm. “Hey,” he said softly, his voice steady but kind. “Look at me.”

“I can’t,” you shook your head, refusing. “You won’t understand.”

“Then help me,” he urged, his hand still resting lightly on your arm. “Talk to me.”

The lump in your throat grew, the words threatening to choke you. “I left them,” you started. “But I had a reason. I couldn’t continue living there. We were poor, so poor, Rafe. Some days we were barely fed and barely had a roof over our heads,” your voice trembled, and you forced yourself to not close your eyes to not relieve that part of your life. “They forced me to se—” but you stopped yourself. Not ready to admit it to Rafe. “—whatever. I just don’t feel like I belong anywhere.”

His jaw tightened, his grip on your arm firming slightly. For a moment, he said nothing, his blue eyes scanning your face as if trying to piece together the fractures you’d worked so hard to hide. Then, quietly, he spoke.

“You belong here,” he said firmly, his voice steady. “With me. Tonight, this party, all of it—it’s for us. And I don’t care who’s not here, because I’m here, okay? You worked hard to get where you are, and you can’t let your past, or anyone, ruin it for you.”

His words hit you like a tidal wave, the sincerity in his voice cutting through the fog of your doubt. Slowly, he reached for your hand, his fingers curling around yours with a warmth that steadied you.

You walked back toward the door, Rafe’s hand lightly resting against your back, guiding you through the villa. As you stepped into the bustling courtyard, the noise of the party hit you again—the sound of laughter, the clinking of glasses, the faint hum of music. It was impossible to escape the energy, the pressure of eyes watching.

You took a deep breath, trying to center yourself. Tonight wasn’t going to be easy, but you’d already survived the worst of it. With Rafe by your side, you could handle whatever came next.

The first person you spotted was Nina, her smile bright and easy as she chatted with a few guests by the drink station. She caught sight of you and waved, excusing herself from the conversation. Her dress—an elegant gold one—flattered her frame as she approached.

“You two disappeared for a while,” Nina said with a teasing glint in her eyes, though there was a hint of concern there, too. “Everything okay?”

“Uh, yeah, don’t worry. Everything’s perfect,” you waved your hands to not worry her. “By the way, Rafe, this is Nina Ramos—my agent and my second mother.”

He extended his hand with a charming grin. “Nice to meet you,” he said smoothly. “YN’s been telling me a lot about you.”

Liar.

Nina took his hand, her sharp eyes flicking between the two of you. “Has she now? All good I hope,” and you nodded instantly. “Well, this party is important and beautiful. Maybe all your overthinking served you well—you look absolutely perfect, honey. You too, Rafe.”

“Thanks,” you blushed at her compliment.

Rafe smirked. “She does look perfect, doesn’t she?”

You gave him a playful look, your lips curling into a reluctant smile at his compliment. 

“I’ll leave you two to it,” she said, a knowing smile playing on her lips. “But it was great meeting you, Rafe Cameron.”

“Likewise,” he replied, and with one last smile, Nina disappeared back into the crowd.

As soon as she was out of earshot, you turned to Rafe with a small smile. “She’s a good friend of mine,” you said softly. “You’ll like her.”

Rafe gave you a raised eyebrow. “She seems cool. I can see why you’re friends.”

Before you could respond, the sound of laughter caught your attention, and you spotted Aisha, her arm linked with a tall, broad-shouldered man. Her husband, Ishan—someone you hadn’t seen in a while. You had to blink to fully register the change in him, but the warmth in your chest was undeniable. 

Without thinking, you broke into a smile and made your way toward them, Rafe following behind.

As soon as Aisha spotted you, her face lit up with recognition. “Look who decided to surprise you,” she smiled, her voice higher because of how excited she was.

You immediately wrapped your arms around her husband, stepping into a hug. He chuckled, holding you tightly as he returned the embrace. “I’ve missed you,” you said, squeezing him as he laughed.

Ishan was like an older brother to you. He’d been there through some of the toughest times in your life, and his easy going nature always managed to bring you a sense of peace. His deep laugh and the familiarity of his embrace were exactly what you needed.

“I’ve missed you too, behen,” he said. “I come back to New York and I’m being told you’re getting married to Rafe Cameron. Imagine my surprise when Aisha told me.”

You pulled back from the embrace and laughed awkwardly. “Ah, yes, Rafe… Surprise, surprise, right?” 

Ishan furrowed his brows but you moved your hands. “I can’t really believe it… It’s really happening…”

“No, no! It’s not like—uh, well, okay, it is, but it’s like…” you turned your head to find Rafe behind Aisha making a cross with his hands. “I love it. He’s so, so, so funny and charming—and very committed, you know…”

“Uh huh, I see,” Ishan nodded and laughed at how weird you were being. “Can’t believe he’s gonna marry a loser like y—”

“So, you’re actually here. It’s been too long—how’s Switzerland?” you interrupted, and he sent you a look because he hated when you did that. “Sorry… but how is it? Did you climb every mountain and, like, yodel on top of a glacier?”

He chuckled a little and shook his head. “No, no yodelling, but I did eat tons of chocolate. I bought some for you too.” You did not even have time to reply to him that he extended a hand toward Rafe, his tone both warm and challenging. “So, you’re the infamous Rafe Cameron. My wife gave me a run-down on you. Some good things… and some questionable ones.”

"Your wife? Wait, who’s your wife?" Rafe asked, his confusion evident.

Oh, crap. You totally forgot to explain the whole family tree situation. Rookie mistake.

Aisha sighed dramatically, rolling her eyes as she raised her hand. "I’m the wife, genius. Seriously, YN—did you not tell him?"

"I’m sorry!" You blurted, cringing. "It completely slipped my mind. It’s just so normal to me that I didn’t even think to—"

Rafe interrupted you, and took Ishan’s hand in his. His smirk disarming but his handshake firm. “Well, I hope the good outweighed the questionable.”

“Debatable,” Ishan replied with a shrug. “But I’ll give you the benefit of the doubt… at least until you give me a reason not to.”

You felt a knot in your stomach as you glanced between the two. Ishan wasn’t being hostile, but his protectiveness had always been intense, like that of an older brother who wasn’t afraid to test the waters.

Rafe, to his credit, didn’t back down. His smirk deepened slightly, and he shrugged with an air of playful confidence. “Fair enough. I’ll do my best not to disappoint.”

“I’d hope so,” Ishan said lightly, though the undertone was clear. His gaze softened as it flicked toward you, his voice gentler now. “You’ve got a good one here. Don’t mess it up.”

“Trust me, I know how lucky I am,” Rafe replied, glancing at you with an expression so sincere it caught you off guard.

The words made your chest tighten in a way you weren’t prepared for, a warmth spreading through you despite the nervous energy still bubbling beneath the surface.

Aisha rolled her eyes, slapping her husband’s chest. “Alright, alright, that’s enough intimidation for one night. Let’s get some drinks, baby.”

Ishan laughed, ruffling Aisha’s hair affectionately before turning to you. “If he gives you any trouble, you know where to find me, behen.”

You grinned at the familiar term of endearment, feeling a wave of gratitude for his presence. “Yup!”

With a wink, they both disappeared into the crowd, leaving you and Rafe standing together.

The second they were out of earshot, Rafe let out a dramatic sigh, running a hand through his hair. “So, is everyone in your life this protective, or is it just me getting the special treatment?”

You smirked, crossing your arms. “What can I say? People care about me. Better get used to it.”

“Noted,” Rafe said, his voice dripping with mock seriousness. “I’ll add it to the ever-growing list of things to keep in mind when dealing with your very... passionate circle of people.”

An awkward silence stretched between us as you scanned the guests arriving. You recognized a few—Aisha’s mom, aunts, and cousins, mingling with Nina’s friends and siblings. You couldn't help but wonder if your wedding would be filled with people who didn’t really know you either.

Rafe stepped closer, standing next to you, and flashed a playful grin. "So, Ishan… he’s your… older brother, right?" He asked, clearly trying to figure out the family dynamic.

You turned to him with a soft laugh, shaking my head. "No, not my brother," you said, before pausing for a moment, trying to find the right words. "Okay, let me explain." You drew in a deep breath, gathering your thoughts. "Ishan’s more like the brother I never had—well, I do have brothers, but when I left home, I hadn’t really connected with them. But then I came to the U.S. and met Aisha, and Ishan just sort of stepped into that role. We’ve been through everything together—good, bad, you name it. He’s always had my back. No blood relation, but he might as well be."

Rafe’s expression softened as he absorbed that, nodding. “Sounds like he’s a pretty solid guy.”

“He really is,” you smiled, warmth creeping into your voice. “He and Aisha have always had my back, and they’ve been together for years now. They make a great team.”

“Yeah, I can tell,” he said, grinning. “He’s got that same intimidating vibe as she does. You can practically feel it.”

You laughed, nodding in agreement. “Exactly! Aisha and I used to joke about it. She always said, if I needed someone to scare off a date, I’d just call Ishan. Aisha’s got that sharp edge, and Ishan? He’s got the muscles.”

“I can definitely see that…” he said with a thoughtful nod before asking, “So, what kind of dynamic do you think we have?”

You shifted uncomfortably, avoiding his gaze for a moment as the question hung in the air. “Uh, well…” You cleared your throat. “I mean, we’re… we’re like, uh, a work in progress? Yeah, that sounds right. Like one of those ‘under construction’ signs, you know? A little chaotic…?” You laughed nervously, rubbing the back of your neck.

Rafe raised an eyebrow, clearly amused. “Chaotic? Really? You’re gonna call us chaotic?”

“Yeah, well, have you met you?” You shot back, crossing your arms. “You’re like a walking disaster zone.”

He laughed, leaning back. “Oh, I’m a disaster? You’re the one who keeps on throwing shade. For no reason at all.”

“That’s because you don’t know how to mind your own business,” you snapped, the words biting as you shrugged nonchalantly. “You’re the one getting all up in my space with your weird questions.”

“I’m not asking weird questions,” he shot back, his voice rising to match the sharpness of yours. “And do you seriously think we’re chaotic?”

You gave him a side-eye, arms crossed tightly over your chest. “Chaotic is an understatement, Cameron. We’re a disaster—with a capital D.”

He laughed, the sound low and amused, as though he didn’t take you seriously. “Oh really? You’re one to talk. You practically live for the drama.”

“Me? I live for drama?” You scoffed, pivoting fully to face him now, hands planted firmly on your hips as you let your eyes travel up and down him in a mixture of disbelief and annoyance. “You’re the definition of drama. You can’t even breathe without making everything about you.”

His lips curled into a grin, the kind that made your stomach twist in a way you refused to acknowledge. “You’re so easy to rile up.”

“You’re a jackass,” you muttered, shaking your head, every fiber of your being wanting to push him away—but not sure if you meant physically or emotionally.

He leaned in slightly, as if to throw another jibe your way, but instead, his eyes gleamed with mischief. “I think you’re just mad because I’m better at this than you.”

Your eyes narrowed, and you closed the distance between you, but the move was more impulsive than you intended. You instantly regretted it, realizing just how close you were to him now, the heat from his body practically radiating against yours. You swallowed, trying to mask the effect it had on you. “Better at what? Being a complete asshole?” Your voice wavered with a sharpness that betrayed how much it bothered you. “Yeah, Rafe, you’re a pro at that.”

He leaned in even closer, and this time, his grin wasn’t just playful—it was dangerous. “You love it,” he murmured, voice dropping an octave, making your heart skip a beat.

You didn’t flinch. Instead, you rolled your eyes, trying to keep control of the situation. “Oh, fuck off. The only thing I like is when you finally shut up.” You crossed your arms tighter, trying to distance yourself emotionally, but it was hard to ignore the proximity between you two, the tension hanging thick in the air.

He was close now, too close, and it was suffocating in the most unsettling way. His breath was warm against your skin, the space between you closing so much that you could almost taste the words on his lips before they even came. 

“Is that so?” His voice was low, teasing, his grin widening as his gaze dropped to your lips, lingering there just long enough to make you feel it.

You couldn’t help it—you gulped, the way he was looking at you making your pulse race, something deep inside you stirring against the cold front you were trying so hard to put up. “Yeah, that so,” you managed, but your voice had a tremor to it now, and you hated yourself for it.

He smiled, the kind of smile that could make you want to punch him and kiss him all at once. “Well, in that case,” he said, the words dragging as he leaned even closer, his breath ghosting over your ear, “I’m just gonna keep talking.” His voice was barely above a whisper, but it carried enough weight to send a shiver down your spine.

You couldn’t tell if you wanted to scream at him or kiss him.

You could feel his presence pressing in on you, the heat between you two almost unbearable, and for a moment, you forgot how to breathe. The world outside of him seemed to vanish, the hum of the city, the weight of your thoughts, everything melting away until there was only the sound of your heart pounding in your ears. You knew you should pull away, should say something, anything, to break this tension, but the words wouldn’t come.

He watched you closely, his eyes locked onto yours, a hint of something unreadable flickering there—something playful, something dangerous, maybe both.

“You look like you’re about to say something,” he said, his voice thick with amusement.

You opened your mouth, trying to push past the lump in your throat, but it felt like the words were stuck. Instead, you just looked at him—really looked at him for the first time in what felt like forever. He was close, too close, but in that moment, it felt impossible to back away. He made you feel things you didn’t want to feel, things that you didn’t understand.

“I don’t wanna say anything,” you muttered, the words slipping out as a mix of frustration and something you refused to acknowledge.

“Yeah?” He raised an eyebrow, that devilish smirk curling on his lips.

You forced yourself to meet his gaze, but you didn’t say a word. You simply nodded, lips pressed together in a thin line, trying to hold onto some semblance of control.

He closed the gap between you, leaning in with deliberate slowness. You could feel the heat of his body inching closer, the soft scent of his cologne filling your senses, until his lips barely brushed against your cheek. The kiss was featherlight, teasing—infuriatingly so. It was enough to make your stomach twist with desire, but you refused to let it show. You wanted to press your thighs together, to feel that familiar ache between your legs, but you wouldn't give him the satisfaction of knowing how much he was affecting you.

“Well, I have something to say,” his voice was low, rich with satisfaction as he lingered just inches from your skin. “I think… You’re not as immune to me as you like to pretend.”

The words sent a jolt through your chest, but you shook your head, pulling your hands up to his chest, your fingers pressing into the fabric of his shirt, then gliding slowly to his neck, tracing the line of his jaw before resting at the back of it. You felt his pulse under your fingertips, and your breath hitched.

“I don’t… I don’t pretend,” you said, your voice quieter, but the frustration bubbling underneath was unmistakable. “You’re just an idiot,” you continued, pressing your palms harder into his skin. “And so fucking frustrating.”

He let out a dark chuckle, the sound dripping with arrogance. “Look at you.” His hand reached up, brushing a stray strand of hair away from your face, his thumb grazing your cheek. “You’re getting all worked up. You want this, don’t you? I can see it. You’re practically begging me to fuck you right now with those eyes. Is that what you want, baby?”

Every nerve in your body screamed yes. You could feel your pulse racing, your skin burning as his words settled deep inside you. The ache between your legs was undeniable now, but your mind fought back. Your heart was pounding in your ears, screaming no. You couldn't let yourself fall for this again. You remembered the last time—the cold distance after everything had gotten too real, the way he’d pulled away, leaving you shattered. You couldn’t be left like that again. 

But then, the look on his face—those sharp eyes, glimmering with something dangerous. He looked so good, so fucking good, in that white suit that fit him like a second skin. The way it molded to his chest, the tightness around his biceps, made your breath catch in your throat. You couldn’t help it. You wanted to touch him, feel the strength of his muscles under your fingers, wanted to bite at his neck, press your lips to the smooth skin there and feel him shudder beneath you.

God, it was maddening. You hated how he made you feel so out of control, how every inch of him seemed to draw you in. Your body was betraying you, and you hated it.

But what about him? Did he feel the same pull? Did he burn for you the way you did for him, or was this just another game for him to play, another conquest to add to his long list? The uncertainty gnawed at you.

Rafe’s eyes never left you as you fought to suppress the desire stirring within you. But he knew it. He could see it in the way your breath hitched, in the way you couldn’t stop your hands from brushing against him, testing the limits, even as you pretended to resist. 

But something shifted in him. He straightened, his posture changing, the smug grin slipping ever so slightly as his gaze flickered to the entrance of the party.

It wasn’t just any glance—it was sharp, instinctive. He’d caught sight of someone familiar, someone whose presence immediately shifted the air in the room.

You followed his line of sight, your chest tightening as you noticed who it was: The Cameron family. Sarah, Wheezie, Rose, and Ward. Their arrival had a different weight, one that Rafe clearly felt deep in his bones. You saw the way his jaw clenched, the way his eyes darkened for just a moment, before he quickly masked it with a flash of that signature cocky smile.

Ward, tall and imposing in his crisp suit, moved with the sort of authority that always seemed to follow him. Rose, on his arm, was more subdued but equally elegant, her gaze sharp as she surveyed the crowd, clearly scanning for something or someone. Their eyes met Rafe’s across the room, and the tension in his body was palpable.

His hand, which had been resting lightly at your waist, now tightened, fingers pressing into the fabric of your dress in a way that made you wonder if he even noticed. But you noticed him. You noticed the subtle shift in his demeanor, the way he suddenly seemed aware of every movement, every gesture, every word spoken around him.

He cleared his throat, stepping back slightly from you, though his body remained rigid, still keeping you close. “I think my parents just walked in,” he said quietly, as though speaking more to himself than to you, but the edge in his voice was unmistakable.

You looked at him, the reality of the situation settling in. His family—his father, especially—was here, and suddenly everything felt different. The air seemed heavier. The playful banter between you both had shifted into something more guarded, more calculated.

“Yeah, I noticed,” you whispered.

Rafe took a slow breath, his eyes never leaving his parents as they moved further into the room, exchanging greetings with guests. He didn’t speak immediately, as if preparing himself for whatever role he was about to play in front of them. His jaw clenched again, but he quickly forced a smile back onto his face, turning to you.

“Let’s go say hello, yeah?” His voice was smoother now, though you could still sense the unease beneath the surface. It was almost like he was pulling back, retreating into the version of himself he showed them—controlled, perfect, everything his father demanded of him. “Is that okay with you?”

No.

You nodded, feeling the weight of his tension on your shoulders, but you followed him. The closer you got to his family, the more you could feel the pressure build. Rafe's movements were more deliberate now, like he was preparing to play his part in the family drama. You couldn’t help but notice how differently he held himself around them—like a man who knew he would never measure up, no matter how much he tried.

Rafe paused just before reaching them, throwing you a look that was both apologetic and protective. It was as if, for just a moment, he needed you to understand how much this moment mattered. But you weren’t sure if it was about impressing them or surviving the encounter with his family’s expectations. Whatever it was, you could feel it thick in the air, something unspoken but undeniable.

Rafe’s steps slowed as you reached his father, Ward. He was a towering figure, impeccably dressed in a tailored suit, his presence seemingly taking over the entire space. Rose, his stepmother, stood slightly behind him, elegant and poised, her eyes a sharp contrast to Ward’s cool and calculating demeanor.

Rafe stopped just short of them, his hand still on your waist, but his stance had subtly shifted—he was guarded, unsure, like he was ready to retreat if the need arose.

“Dad,” Rafe greeted, his voice smooth but lacking its usual confidence. His posture was just a little too stiff, as if waiting for the inevitable judgment that would come with every interaction.

Ward's gaze lingered on Rafe for a beat longer than normal before he acknowledged him, his tone clipped. “Rafe,” he said, the smile on his face barely noticeable, more a polite curve of the lips than anything genuine. “You’re looking well.”

The words hung in the air, but they didn’t carry any warmth. It was a statement of fact rather than praise, and it made your skin prickle. You could feel Rafe tense beside you, his fingers tightening just a little, but he didn’t let it show. Instead, he gave a small, practiced smile and nodded. “Thanks, Dad.”

You remained silent for a moment, unsure of where to fit in, but Sarah, ever the warm presence, was the first to step forward. She flashed you a grin, her eyes already lighting up with recognition. “Hey, YN!” she said enthusiastically, her voice a welcome contrast to the tension in the air. "So good to see you again!"

"Hi, Sarah," you responded, your smile easing a little, feeling comforted by her energy. "It’s good to see you too."

She pulled you into a friendly hug, and you found yourself relaxing into it. Sarah had this easygoing charm about her, a lightness that made you forget the weight of the room for a moment. She was everything Rafe wasn’t—effortlessly kind, bubbly, and generous with her affection.

“Wheezie and I were just talking about you,” Sarah added, and you turned to find a petite, younger girl standing a few feet away.

Wheezie’s face lit up when she caught your gaze. “Hi. I’m Wheezie. It’s cool to meet you.”

You smiled at her. “Hi, Wheezie. I’m Y/N. It’s nice to meet you too.”

She tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, clearly nervous. “You’re a model, right? That’s so cool. I’ve seen your pictures in Vogue!”

You blinked in surprise, warmth spreading in your chest. “You have?”

“Yeah!” Wheezie nodded enthusiastically. “You’re so pretty, and your outfits are amazing. How did you even start doing that?”

Her genuine curiosity was disarming, and for a moment, you forgot the tension hanging in the air. You leaned slightly closer, your smile becoming more natural. “It’s a long story, but I’ll tell you sometime if you want.”

Wheezie’s face lit up. “Really? That’d be awesome.”

Rafe, who had been watching the interaction silently, finally spoke up, his voice tinged with amusement. “Wheezie, you’re gonna scare her off.”

Wheezie flushed, but she grinned up at her brother. “I’m just being friendly.”

“She’s fine,” you said quickly, shooting Wheezie a reassuring smile. “It’s nice to meet someone who’s actually interested in what I do.”

Rose cleared her throat, interrupting the light moment. “Oh, we’re interested in you, dear,” she said, her tone honeyed but with an edge of condescension. “Rafe’s been so secretive about you, it’s about time we got to know you better.”

“Oh, I’m sorry,” you apologized with a polite smile. “I’m here now, though.”

“Yes, you are,” Ward interjected, his gaze narrowing slightly. “Rafe mentioned your career. It must be… demanding.”

You nodded carefully. “It can be, but I enjoy it. I’ve worked hard to get where I am.”

Ward tilted his head, his expression unreadable. “And maintaining that image must be just as hard. I imagine you have to watch every calorie to stay in shape for your work. Must be exhausting.”

The words hit you like a sharp slap, your chest tightening as old insecurities clawed their way to the surface. You forced a neutral smile, but your nails dug into the palm of your hand to keep steady. “It’s part of the job,” you replied carefully, your voice steady despite the storm brewing inside you.

Rose waved a dismissive hand, her eyes flitting over you in a way that felt equally invasive. “Don’t listen to him, honey. You look perfectly healthy to me. Honestly, I’d kill to have your body.”

Her words were meant as a compliment, but they were worse than his. “Thank you,” you murmured, your voice quieter now.

Rafe stiffened beside you, his hand tightening slightly on your waist. “Alright, that’s enough,” he said, his tone firm, a warning laced beneath the words.

But Ward ignored him, his attention still on you. “We’re not saying anything wrong. She does look healthy… in a sickly way.” His smile was thin, and though the words were spoken lightly, there was an edge to them.

You forced another smile, but your composure was slipping. The weight of their attention, the veiled comments, the subtle dissection of your body—it was too much.

“I’m sorry,” you said abruptly, stepping back slightly. “Excuse me for a moment.”

The moment you stepped into the bathroom, the world outside seemed to dissolve. The faint hum of voices from the gathering became muffled as you locked the door and leaned against it, your chest heaving. You clutched your stomach, the ache inside more emotional than physical, as Ward’s and Rose’s comments echoed in your mind.

Your reflection in the mirror stared back, unkind and unforgiving. You pressed your trembling hands against the sink, breathing shallowly as the familiar sensation of panic crept up your throat.

No matter how far you thought you’d come, it was always there — lurking in the shadows, waiting for a moment of vulnerability. Your stomach churned violently, the pressure too much. You barely made it to the toilet before the wave overtook you.

Kneeling on the cold tile, you hated yourself for this relapse. Your body trembled as tears stung your eyes, the shame wrapping around you like a suffocating blanket. You knew better. Yet here you were, undone by a handful of careless words.

The door suddenly creaked open. Panic seized you as you tried to compose yourself, but it was too late.

“YN?” Rafe’s voice was low and tentative, laced with worry. He must’ve picked the lock.

You froze, your back to him, trying to will him away. “Go away, Rafe.”

He didn’t. Instead, he stepped inside, shutting the door softly behind him.

You heard the scuff of his shoes as he approached, but you couldn’t bring yourself to turn around. “Please,” you whispered, your voice breaking. “Just leave me alone.”

But then he was kneeling beside you, his presence warm and steady despite the storm raging inside you. His hand gently touched your back, and you flinched, but he didn’t pull away.

“I’m here,” he said simply, his tone quiet but firm. He reached out, gathering your hair and pulling it away from your face with a tenderness that made your heart ache. “You don’t have to say anything. Just let me help.”

The knot in your throat tightened, and a sob escaped before you could stop it. You covered your face with your hands, shaking your head. “I’m so pathetic,” you choked out, tears streaming down your cheeks. “I promised myself I’d never do this again. I’ve tried so hard to move on, to be better. But it’s always there. It’s always waiting for me to fail.”

He paused, his hand stilling for a moment before he spoke. “You’re not failing,” he said, his voice softer now. “You’re human. You’ve been through a lot, and you’re still standing. That’s not failing, YN. That’s surviving.”

His words hit you harder than you expected, and you finally turned to look at him. His blue eyes were fixed on you, full of a mix of anger and concern—not at you, but for you. He reached up, brushing a tear from your cheek with a gentleness that nearly broke you.

“Do you want to talk about it?” he asked carefully.

You hesitated, your walls instinctively rising. But something about the way he looked at you—without judgment, without pity—made you feel safe enough to let them down.

“It’s… it’s complicated,” you began, your voice shaky. “I’ve struggled with this for a long time. Since I was a teenager. Modeling didn’t cause it, but it made it worse. Everyone always has something to say about my body—it’s too thin, it’s too big, it’s never enough.” you swallowed hard, your throat burning. “And tonight… your dad, Rose… they just hit a nerve.”

Rafe’s jaw tightened, and you could see the anger flickering in his eyes. But he didn’t interrupt, letting you speak at your own pace.

“I thought I was past it,” you admitted, your voice breaking. “But it never really goes away. It just… quiets down. Until something like this happens.”

Rafe nodded slowly, his gaze never leaving yours. “I get it,” he said, surprising you. “Not in the same way, but I get it. The pressure, the expectations. Feeling like no matter what you do, it’s never enough.”

You stared at him, the rawness in his voice catching you off guard.

“I’m sorry for that,” you whispered, fresh tears spilling over. “And for what you saw.”

“Don’t apologize,” Rafe said firmly, his hand finding yours and squeezing gently. “You don’t have to apologize. Not to me. Not to anyone.”

His words cracked something open inside you, and the sobs came harder now, wracking your body. Rafe didn’t hesitate. He pulled you into his arms, holding you tightly as you cried into his chest.

“It’s okay,” he murmured, his voice steady and soothing. “I’ve got you. I promise.”

After what felt like an eternity, your tears began to subside. You pulled back slightly, embarrassed by the mess you’d made of his shirt. “Sorry,” you mumbled, wiping at your face.

Rafe chuckled softly, shaking his head. “Don’t be. This shirt was ugly anyway.”

The small attempt at humor made you smile, even if it was faint. He stood, helping you to your feet, his hand steadying you as you wavered.

“You okay?” he asked, his gaze searching for yours.

You nodded, though you weren’t entirely sure. “I just… need a minute. Is that okay?”

Rafe hesitated, clearly reluctant to leave you alone. But after a moment, he nodded. “Alright… Take all the time you need. I’ll be right outside.”

As he stepped toward the door, you felt a pang of guilt. “Rafe?”

He turned back, his expression softening.

“Thank you,” you said quietly. “For… this.”

His lips curved into a small smile. “Don’t mention it.”

“Are you serious right now?” Rafe’s voice was sharp, cutting through the murmur of conversation like a knife. “What the fuck is wrong with you?”

“Rafe—” Ward started, but his son didn’t let him finish.

“No, you listen to me,” he snapped, his anger palpable. “If you ever talk to her like that, we’re done. I mean it.”

Your heart stopped, and you moved closer, careful to stay out of sight.

“Rafe, calm down,” Rose’s voice said, her tone exasperated.

“No,” Rafe snapped. “I’m not calming down. Do you have any idea what you just did? What your comments did to her?”

There was a beat of silence before Ward spoke, his tone dismissive. “It was just a harmless observation. She’s a grown woman. She can handle it.”

“Harmless?” Rafe’s voice rose, trembling with fury. “You don’t know the first thing about her, and you sure as hell don’t get to say shit like that to her ever again.”

“Rafe—”

“No,” he cut Ward off, his voice firm and unyielding. “You don’t get to do this. Not to her. If you can’t show her some respect for once in your life, then don’t bother talking to her at all.”

The room fell silent, the weight of his words hanging heavy in the air.

Your chest tightened, a swell of emotions rising as you listened to him defend you with such ferocity. For all his cocky bravado and sarcastic quips, Rafe had just shown you a side of himself you hadn’t expected.

A side that cared.

A side that would fight for you.

You stepped back, went back to the bathroom, giving him space to finish the conversation. But as you stood there, a small, genuine smile broke across your face.

When Rafe returned to the bathroom, his shoulders were tense, but his eyes softened when they landed on you. “Hey,” he said quietly, stepping inside and closing the door behind him.

“Hey,” you echoed, your voice trembling slightly.

“I’m sorry if I took too long,” he said, sitting beside you on the floor. “I had to take care of some—.”

“I heard you,” you admitted, your voice barely above a whisper.

“You heard me?” his brows furrowed. “Heard what?”

“What you said. To them. Ward and Rose.”

“Oh…” his eyes widened. “I’m sorry if you think I stepped a line. It just really pissed me off what they said about you and thought that if you were going to see them again, they should know their li—”

“You don’t need to apologize, Cameron,” you interrupted, a quiet laugh slipping past your lips, the sound easing the tension in his shoulders. “Thank you, though…”

His gaze softened, and for a moment, it felt like the world outside the room fell away. “Of course.”

He stood and extended a hand to you, palm open and steady. You hesitated for the briefest moment, not because you didn’t want to take it but because the gesture felt like more than it was. When your hand slipped into his, his fingers closed around yours.

You stood, brushing invisible creases from your saree and adjusting the edges with nervous precision. Rafe’s eyes lingered on you, watching the delicate way your fingers moved, the subtle rise and fall of your shoulders as you steadied yourself.

When you glanced up at him, offering a soft, grateful smile, something in his chest tightened, and he knew he was done for.

“Okay, let’s do this,” you said, your voice stronger now.

He nodded, but as you turned toward the door, he couldn’t stop himself from saying it, even if you wouldn’t hear it. “You’re worth it,” he whispered, the words low and raw, like they’d been pulled straight from his heart.

He stood there, hand still tingling from where yours had been, a storm of emotions churning inside him. His mind raced, his heart pounded, and every inch of him felt consumed by something he wasn’t ready to name.

chapter eleven.

[earthchica]

Funny How Times Flies | 5

terry richmond x black, fem!/plus size reader

summary: you and terry have been locked in your relationship for five months, and with the holidays approaching, you both agree to finally meet each other’s families.

warnings: explicit smut (18+), slow jams, making love, oral (f), fluff, encouragement, family gathering, angst, anxiety, mention of a pregnancy scare, mention of kids and marriage, thanksgiving, words: (4k)

Note: Hiiii. I hope y'all eat some good food today and have a good time with your family. Please enjoy! Let me know your thoughts and if you want to be tagged in future parts.

series masterlist

-

You and Terry have been dating for nearly five months, and it has been so wonderful. Like any couple, you've faced ups and downs; for instance, Terry hasn't found a job since moving to Lafayette, and you had a pregnancy scare.

Fortunately, both of you were relieved to discover you weren't pregnant, but it did spark an honest conversation about wanting kids and getting married to each other one day.

Living together now has undeniably grown you both as a couple. You've fallen more deeply in love with Terry than before. Just waking up and seeing his handsome face every day was everything.

Of course, both of you established clear boundaries that have fostered responsibility, trust, and respect in your relationship. A gentle breeze pulled you from your thoughts, and you adjusted to the soft sunlight that filtered through the trees.

You gaze over at Terry, and you can't help but smile at him laying on his back on the picnic blanket. His eyes were closed peacefully, and his chest rose and fell gently with each breath.

You turn your gaze away from him and absorb the atmosphere around you. The park presents a stunning autumn scene, filled with the sounds of chirping birds and the rustling of fallen leaves.

Though the day's warmth is slightly more intense than you'd hoped for, it only adds to the coziness of the moment. You blink, pulling yourself out of your daydreaming, and turn your attention back to Terry.

You can't help but wonder what he said moments before, triggering his soft chuckle. You feel a warmth spread through you, a mix of affection and curiosity, and you can’t wait to hear what’s on his mind.

“I’ve been trying to find the best way to express this, but I’m not sure how—” Terry starts, his words tumbling out in a rush as he begins to ramble, quickly losing his train of thought.

You watch him with concern, sensing his hesitation. “What is it, T?” you ask gently, placing your hand softly on his arm to offer reassurance.

After taking a deep breath, he suddenly looks directly at you, his eyes sparkling excitedly. “I want you to meet my family,” he declares, his voice filled with enthusiasm.

Surprised and nervous, you widen your eyes and respond, “Really? You mean, like… your parents and your family?” Terry nodded eagerly, his bright, expressive eyes gleaming with warmth and genuine affection.

A wide, sincere smile stretched across his face. “Yes, baby! I want my family to finally meet the incredible woman I’m in love with,” he proclaimed, his voice infused with enthusiasm that hung like a melody in the crisp air around you.

“They’ve been constantly asking about you and are practically excited about getting to know you!” His heartfelt words enveloped you in a comforting embrace, easing the nervous flutter of uncertainty gripping your stomach.

The notion of becoming part of his family ignited a joyful spark within you, painting vivid images in your mind of laughter-filled gatherings and shared experiences.

Yet, despite the warmth swelling in your chest, you couldn’t shake a twinge of hesitation. You glanced at him, unsure of the expectations swirling around this moment.

Noticing the uncertainty in your expression, Terry's demeanor shifted. The enthusiasm in his eyes dimmed slightly as a shadow of concern crossed his face.

He shifted his gaze downward, struggling with his own words. Clearing his throat, he spoke again, his voice softening to a more tentative tone.

“But if you don’t think you’re ready for that, then it’s completely okay,” Terry said, his sincerity evident. He rose from the soft blanket as he took a few steps away.

You stood up immediately, your heart urging you to bridge the space between you. With a gentle resolve, you walked toward him and wrapped your arms around his waist. "Terry, I'm ready"

The sweetness of your voice prompted him to turn around, and in that moment, his expression shifted. Wonder flickered in his eyes, quickly replaced by gratitude and hope.

"I would love to meet your family, Terry!" you said with a warm, inviting smile, excited at the thought. He paused for a moment, his expression shifting to one of surprise.

"Wait, are you sure?" he asked, a hint of uncertainty in his voice. "Yes!" you replied confidently, your heart racing. Terry’s face broke into a bright smile, unable to contain his joy.

He scooped you up effortlessly and spun you around in a playful circle. "Terry, put me down!" you laughed with exhilaration and wrapped your arms around his shoulders.

"Oh, sweetheart, I'm glad to hear that! I was going to ask you if you wanted to go with me this Thursday coming up for Thanksgiving," he said, gently setting you back on your feet but still holding you close.

"Of course I want to go! But only if you come with me to my parents' house tomorrow," you proposed, playfully poking your lips towards him, eyes closed in anticipation. "Seal it with a kiss."

He leaned in and kissed you passionately, sending a warm rush through your body. "Mmm, Terry…why do you have to do that with your tongue?" you purred, biting your lip.

You gazed up into his eyes; the playfulness between you was real. He shrugged, a smirk dancing across his lips. "Don’t act like you don’t love it," he teased.

Terry suddenly grabbed your ass, causing you to squeal in surprise and delight. You looked up at him, your eyes filled with a mix of affection and lust.

-

It was a bright, sunny day, the kind where the warmth of the sun seemed to create a joyful atmosphere. You and Terry strolled hand in hand along the familiar path to your parents' ranch home.

As you approached the front door, Terry glanced down at his clothes for the fifth time, a nervous look on his face. “Do I look good?” he asked, adjusting a collar that didn’t need fixing.

You chuckled softly, your heart swelling with affection. “Sweetie, you look absolutely handsome. Stop worrying! Now come on!” you reassured him, flashing a warm smile before pressing the doorbell.

After moments of waiting, the door swung open, revealing your mom with a beaming smile illuminating her face. Without hesitation, she wrapped her arms around you in a tight, loving hug.

“Hi, Mama,” you said, relishing the comfort of her embrace before gently pulling away.

“Hey, my baby girl—Oh,” she began, stopping mid-sentence as her eyes landed on Terry.

“Oh, hello! You must be Terry. It's so nice to finally meet you! We’ve heard so much about you!” she exclaimed, pulling him into a firm, welcoming hug.

“We would have loved to meet you sooner, but…” she teased, giving you a playful glance filled with maternal affection.

“It’s truly nice to meet you too, ma’am,” Terry replied, a little taken aback by the warmth of her greeting as he pulled away, looking genuinely pleased.

“Come on in, you two!” Your mom said, stepping aside to let both of you enter. The interior of your childhood home felt inviting and warm, filled with cherished memories.

Terry's eyes widened as he took in the various elements that hinted at your upbringing. “You have a lovely house,” he said, glancing around the cozy living room and noting family photos adorning the walls.

Each picture told a story, capturing moments of laughter and love with you and your parents. He added, “It feels so homey here.” You looked up at him and felt pleased to see the look in his eyes.

“Why, thank you, honey!” your mom replied, closing the front door gently behind you. Her eyes sparkled with appreciation, and Terry nodded admiringly at her.

His earlier nerves started to dissipate, and he switched his attention back to you, a sweet smile lighting up his face. Your mom led you both into the living room.

Your dad and some other family members were waiting there. He was seated on the couch, a comforting presence exuding the authority of a protective father.

"Hey...now, there's my sweet pea," your dad said, clapping his hands and standing up. He quickly crossed the room to envelop you in a warm, tight hug.

"Hi, Dad!" you said with a chuckle before pulling away from the hug to motion him towards Terry. “Who’s this?” Your dad asked, glancing over at Terry, his brow slightly furrowed.

Terry shifted his weight from one foot to the other, a subtle sign of his nervousness, while you instinctively squeezed his hand, offering him strength.

“Dad, this is Terry, my boyfriend,” you proudly introduced him, smiling warmly at your dad. “And Terry, this is my dad.” Terry took a deep breath, clearly feeling the weight of your dad’s scrutinizing gaze.

You shifted your eyes nervously between them, hoping this potentially awkward moment would pass without incident. “Terry, huh?” your dad began, his expression severe and unwelcoming.

“So, Terry, what are your intentions with my daughter?” your dad asked. Your heart raced a little at the question, but you understood your dad's protective instincts came from a caring place.

Sensing the moment's gravity, Terry straightened his posture, his voice steady and confident. “I intend to treat her with the respect and the love she deserves, sir. She means a lot to me;"

Terry moves his eyes away from your dad to look at you. "I love her and care deeply about her. I see myself spending the rest of my life with her, honestly.”

Your heart fluttered as you smiled at him, and Your dad nodded thoughtfully, a satisfied smile slowly creeping onto his face as he assessed Terry's response.

“Good answer. If you treat her right, we won’t have any problems. But let me be clear: if you hurt her in any way, you’ll have to answer to me and my shotgun.”

Terry was confused on the last part until your dad pointed the shot gun above the fireplace. He nodded, quickly understanding. “I understand, sir. I promise,” Terry replied.

“Alright then,” your dad said, visibly relaxing now. “Welcome to the family, son.” He extended his hand, and Terry shook it firmly, smiling genuinely.

Feeling a wave of relief wash over you, you laughed lightly. “Okay, let me introduce you to everyone else,” you said, taking his hand again and leading him deeper into the living room.

With a bright smile and eagerness, you announced to your family, “Hey, everyone! This is Terry, my boyfriend! Terry, this is my Uncle Eddie, my dad's brother, and his wife, my Aunt Clara,”

You pointed to each as you went along, “And over there are their kids, my cousins, Mia and Jalen.”

“Nice to meet you all,” Terry said, offering a warm smile as he waved, his nervousness fading as he engaged with your family.

“Welcome! It’s about time we finally met the guy who has our niecy smiling so much!” Aunt Clara exclaimed, her voice full of warmth as she pulled Terry into a hug as tight as your mom’s.

“Yeah, if you keep making her this happy, we’ve never seen her glow so bright!” Mia joked, her playful tone earning hearty laughter from the group.

You rolled your eyes at their teasing but couldn’t help but smile wider. “Alright, alright! Enough of that!” you said, laughing along. As the conversation flowed effortlessly.

The atmosphere in the room became lively and inviting, filled with laughter and childhood stories from your family. Soon, you all were around the table, and Terry gradually relaxed, engaging with everyone.

The mouthwatering aroma of the food wafted through the air, filling the room with the comforting scent of soul food, which always brought a sense of warmth and joy during family gatherings on holidays.

Dishes brimming with fried chicken wings, ham, collard greens, macaroni and cheese, and cornbread were spread across the table, each a testament to home-cooked love and tradition.

After everyone had gathered and offered a heartfelt blessing over the meal, you all began eating and drifted into a conversation about anything.

Your parents asked Terry a series of questions to learn more about him, curious about his interests and background. You chimed in with answers to ease his nervousness, sharing details that highlighted Terry's personality and values.

As the conversation progressed, your dad seemed particularly fascinated by Terry's marine background. The more they talked, the more your parents began to appreciate him.

Their growing fondness for him was reflected in their expressions and laughter. It was clear that Terry was making a solid impression, and you couldn’t help but feel happy seeing them get along so well.

“So, Terry,” Uncle Eddie said, leaning back in his chair with a stern demeanor, “Since you've been done here, have you found a job?” He asked.

You and Terry exchanged an apprehensive glance, silently communicating the unexpected question. “Uh...no...I’m still looking for a job, sir,” Terry replied, his voice betraying a hint of uncertainty.

“Wait, you’re telling me you’ve moved here to be with her, but you’re not working? Sounds like a cozy arrangement,” he remarked, his tone sharper.

Terry kept his composure, responding steadily, “I’m actively looking for a job, sir. Moving here was a big step for me, and I want to ensure I find the right fit.”

Aunt Clara chimed in, “Oh, come on, Eddie! It’s tough out there with the job market right now. Give the boy a break.” But your uncle wasn’t finished.

“Sure, but it sounds like he’s just living off her. What’s he contributing?” he pressed, crossing his arms, a challenging look in his eyes.

You felt the tension rise and placed a reassuring hand on Terry’s lap. “Unc, please chill out. Terry has been incredibly supportive of me, and he’s been working hard to find a job that suits him.”

“Supportive, huh?” Uncle Eddie countered. “What the hell does that even mean? How supportive can you be if you’re not bringing in income?”

Terry spoke up, his tone calm but firm. “I may not be working right now, but I’m doing everything I can to help around the house and support her emotionally.”

Your dad jumped in, sensing the growing hostility. “Alright, Eddie, that’s enough. Everyone’s situation is different; judging Terry without knowing him is unfair. He’s trying, and that's what counts.”

“Exactly,” your mom added, giving Eddie a pointed look. “Remember when you were struggling to get started? It takes time, and moving to a new place is hard. Terry deserves our support, not criticism.”

Mia and Jalen nodded in agreement. “Yeah, Pops, you’re being a bit harsh,” Jalen said. With a sigh, Uncle Eddie relented slightly. “Well, he’d better step up soon if he wants to stick around,” he muttered.

The conversation gradually shifted back to lighter topics, but you felt proud of Terry for standing his ground. You squeezed his hand, and he smiled slightly in appreciation.

After dinner, everyone moved into the living room to talk and play games; you took Terry's hand and led him upstairs into your old bedroom.

“I’m really sorry about my uncle; he can be quite overwhelming at times,” you said, observing Terry as he scanned your room uncertainly.

It felt like the silence stretched between you, heavy with unspoken words. He was lost in thought, maybe processing everything around him.

“Terry, baby, you know you can talk to me,?” you asked softly, your hand finding his shoulder gently. You assured him he could lean on you, especially in such moments.

Terry turned towards you, revealing the anxiety in his eyes. “I want to give you what you deserve and to provide for you; I can't do that without a job,” he began.

“Terry, don’t worry about my uncle; he just like talking shit. You’re doing your best, and I love you so much for that,” you reassured him.

“It’s not all about what you provide; it’s about the love we share and the support we give each other. You are a good man with a good heart. Remember, we’re doing this together.”

Terry looked into your eyes, his expression softening. “You always know how to lift me up.”

Desiring to lighten the mood further, "I know, handsome" you said with a playful grin, “How about a joke? What do you call fake spaghetti?”

Terry raised an eyebrow, curiosity piqued. “I don’t know, what?”

“An impasta!” you giggled, and to your delight, he broke into laughter, the tension easing away.

“What? That was terrible!” he chuckled, cringing while shaking his head, but the smile on his face told you it had worked.

“Well, I have plenty more where that came from!” you teased playfully, stepping closer to him, eager to close the distance between you.

Your lips met in a sweet, lingering kiss that seemed to capture the essence of your togetherness and love. When you finally pulled away, you gazed into his eyes, which sparkled with affection.

“I love you, Terry. I truly believe things will work out; we just have to keep the faith,” you said earnestly.

“I love you too, baby. Thank you,” he replied softly, a genuine smile lighting up his face and warming your heart. Hand in hand, you both left the cozy confines of the bedroom.

Just as you stepped into the hallway, Uncle Eddie appeared unexpectedly, his eyes widening in surprise at the sight of you. “Hey, there you are!” he exclaimed, but his demeanor quickly shifted to one of concern.

“I was just looking for you two. I want to apologize for my earlier behavior. I’m really sorry, Terry, and I’m sorry to both of you. It was unnecessary,” your uncle admitted, sincerity evident in his voice.

You glanced at Terry, who nodded in acknowledgment. “It's cool,” he responded, showing he appreciated the gesture.

“Um, Terry,” Uncle Eddie continued, his tone shifting to a more serious note.

“I remember you talking about your jiu-jitsu training in the Marines. How would you feel about a job at my training school?” His eyes reflected genuine interest, and you gasped in disbelief.

Terry’s expression transformed into one of astonishment. “What? For real? Really?” he questioned, his voice a mix of excitement and surprise.

“Absolutely! It’s the least I could do after everything. Plus, I could really use someone with your skills and passion. We can discuss the details later,” Uncle Eddie said, his voice laced with enthusiasm as he reached out to shake Terry's hand firmly.

“Oh, and you both are a beautiful couple. I wish you two the best,” he added warmly, glancing between you, showing a sense of remorse for his previous actions.

“Thank you, Uncle Eddie,” you said, your smile wide as you appreciated his words and the generous offer. He nodded, visibly relieved, before turning to make his way back to the living room.

Feeling pride and excitement for Terry, you squeezed his hand tightly. “See? Just like I said, things work out,” you beamed at him, confidence bubbling within you.

Terry grinned back, his self-assurance visibly restored. At that moment, it felt as though everything was finally aligning perfectly in your lives.

-

A few days passed, and the long-awaited day finally arrived: Thanksgiving. Today, you will be meeting Terry's family, and you have been preparing for this moment.

Terry carefully backed into a parking spot, allowing you to take in the cozy, welcoming home adorned with autumn decorations. You took a deep breath, steeling yourself for the introductions ahead.

Terry touched your lap and said, "You have nothing to worry about, baby. My family is going to love you, I promise." His comforting words boosted your spirits.

You both stepped out of the car and took a deep breath to ensure you looked presentable. Hand in hand with Terry, you walked toward the front door.

Just as you reached the halfway point, the door swung open to reveal a brown-skinned, petite, slim woman with dark brown, short hair. She stepped out of the front door to greet Terry, and when her eyes shifted to you.

You smiled shyly and said, "Hi!" Your heart raced a little as you stepped into Terry's mother's welcoming presence. She was beautiful, and it was clear where he inherited his good looks.

"Oh, hi, beautiful! Welcome to the family!" she exclaimed with warmth in her voice, and before you could respond, she enveloped you in a tight hug.

The sweet scent of her perfume filled your nose, instantly putting you at ease. You smiled back at her, and the warmth of her embrace made you feel accepted.

As you pulled away, you glanced at Terry, who was watching the exchange with a beaming smile, who was delighted. His contagious happiness made you feel even more welcome in this new family.

"It's very nice to meet you, Mrs. Richmond," you said, pulling away from the hug. She grinned and replied, "Oh, it's very nice to meet you too. Come on in."

As she walked you into her beautiful house, you exclaimed, "Wow, something smells good!"

Mrs. Richmond smiled and said, "Yes, dinner is almost ready. Terry, you and your girlfriend should get settled into the guest bedroom. Not everyone is here yet."

“Sure, Ma,” Terry replied, leaning down to kiss his mom’s cheek quickly before effortlessly grabbing both of your suitcases. You followed him upstairs to the cozy guest bedroom.

After freshening up and gathering your thoughts, you felt excitement mixed with nerves. Once you both returned downstairs, Terry introduced you to his dad.

"Nice to meet you, young lady" He welcomed you with a warm smile and a firm handshake. You couldn't deny how much Terry resembled his father.

Mr. Richmond exuded kindness, making you feel at ease right away. Then you met with his brother and sister, and things went similarly well; they were full of laughter, tales, and good-natured teasing.

His uncle was funny. "I see you, nephew" his uncle whispered, giving him a nudge. His niece and nephews, bursting with energy, excitedly informed you about his favorite movies and toys.

Terry's family welcomed you with genuine smiles, complimented your appearance, and was happy to finally meet you. This warmth washed away lingering nerves and filled your heart with a sense of belonging.

As you settled into the family dynamic, you laughed and joked with Janelle, his older sister. Her vibrant personality made your conversation flow easily.

However, while sharing a light-hearted story, your gaze drifted toward Terry. You couldn’t help but smile at how effortlessly he played with his nieces and nephews.

Janelle noticed your distraction, followed your gaze and her expression turned knowing. “Wow?” she said, raising an eyebrow playfully.

You shifted your attention to her, feeling caught. “What?” you asked, feigning innocence. Janelle continued, “I’ve never seen anyone look at my brother like you do. You’re really in love with him, huh?”

Her words caught you off guard, leaving you momentarily stunned that she had picked up on your feelings. You laughed shyly, brushing your hair back as you contemplated responding.

"Yes, yes, I am!" Your gaze drifted again to your boyfriend. Terry caught your gaze, and you both looked at each other lovingly. Before he could react, one of his nephews tackled him to the ground.

You giggled quietly and turned back to Janelle. "You know. I have known Terry all his life," She began with a smile.

"And he's never introduced anyone to the family before," Janelle said with a warm smile, "but until now, you might just be the one, girl. I'm really happy to see my brother with someone like you." Her words surprised you, and a swell of warmth filled your chest.

"Wow! Thanks, Janelle. That really means a lot to me, and I sincerely hope I am," you replied, feeling a rush of warmth and happiness. The atmosphere around you was inviting, and it felt like you were beginning to carve out a place in their family.

You and Janelle moved on to discuss—everything from favorite movies to embarrassing childhood stories—until Terry approached, a playful glint in his eyes.

"Hey, do you want to join us for a game of spades?" he asked, nodding toward his mom and Shawn, seated at the smaller dining room table.

"Yeah," you answered. After a few lively rounds of the card game, filled with laughter and friendly banter, you felt more comfortable with his family.

It was nice to connect and share these moments. Once the game concluded and the evening wound down, you and Terry bid goodnight to everyone.

Hand in hand, you ascended the staircase to the guest bedroom. As you removed your jewelry, relishing the feeling of the day winding down.

Terry wrapped his arms around you from behind, resting his chin gently on your shoulder, creating a cocoon of warmth. "Wasn't it so bad after all?" he asked, his voice low and comforting.

You placed your earrings carefully in your bag and, still caught in his embrace, shook your head in agreement. "So why were you so nervous?" Terry asked, turning you to face him.

His eyes searched yours for an answer. You wrapped your arms around his shoulders, trying to convey your feelings through the embrace.

"Honestly, I should be asking you the same thing!" You said, looking up at him sweetly. “Nah…I asked you first, baby girl," Terry replied playfully.

His expression softened into that sweet look you adored—the kind that assured you that you could share anything with him, the look indicating that, from the very beginning, you were meant to be together.

"I don't know," you started, feeling vulnerable yet open. "I just had this notion in my head that they wouldn’t like me, you know? But, of course, I was proved wrong. Your family is incredibly sweet, and I love them."

"I feel the same way about your family," Terry said, his expression earnest. "And honestly, even if things hadn't gone perfectly, it wouldn’t matter because I never let you go. Plus, I feel you’re destined to be Mrs. Richmond."

Your heart flipped at his words, and your eyes sparkled with joy. You couldn't hold back the surge of emotion; you leaned in and pressed your lips to his in a sweet kiss.

"I'm never letting you go, either, Terry. I’m forever yours!" you declared confidently, resting your foreheads together. Terry kissed you, but it became a bit heated. *edited* added some smut

Terry placed his hand under your skirt, feeling his fingers caressing against your now wet panties. You put a hand on his chest, halting him just inches from you. "Terry, we're not about to get it on in your parents' house."

He flashed a playful smirk, his eyes glinting with mischief as he leaned in closer, pressing his warm chest against yours. "Come on, baby," he urged, his voice low.

"All we have to do is be quiet." You raised an eyebrow in playful disbelief, curiosity mingling with a hint of challenge in your gaze. "Oh really? And how exactly do you plan on keeping me quiet?"

A smile tugged at your lips as you leaned in slightly, your voice dropping to a seductive whisper. "You know you love it when I get loud."

Terry took a step back, a glint of determination in his eyes. "I promise this time will be different. Just trust me. I’ll lock the door and play some music to drown out any sounds," he whispered, leaning in to gently kiss your neck, sending a shiver down your spine.

His words and the warmth of his breath against your skin made it hard to resist. You could feel your resolve softening as the moment's thrill washed over you. Slowly, you found yourself giving in, your heart racing with excitement.

Terry went to the Bluetooth speaker on the dresser, connected his phone, and began playing some slow jams. He turned back to you, giving you a look that you couldn't deny.

"Fine," you finally said, a smile creeping onto your lips and the lust hanging in the air. You pulled him down into a kiss, and both of you began taking each other's clothes off.

Terry lays you down on the bed, and you let a light moan as he begins kissing your inner thighs before giving your wet pussy lips the soft pecks it deserve.

You cover your mouth, trying to keep quiet as he spreads your legs out a little wider before going back to eating you out. You removed your hand from your lips and bit your lip.

You began rolling your hips to feel his face against your pussy, "Terry...ahh, it feels so good," you whimpered, and he looked up for a second with your juice on his face.

Terry plunging back between your legs and your eyes rolled in the back of your head, secured your hips up an inch to get a little bit more.

He let out a little growl, gripping your lower back to rock your hips against his face, soaking his nose and mouth. "Oh fuck…Terry. So feels good."

You cried in pleasure; that was always music to his ears. Terry couldn't get enough of hearing you telling him how he made you feel and the pleasure he gave you.

Your eyes rolled in the back of your head when you felt his tongue hit a good sweet spot. "Mmm, you're doing good, baby," He declares so deeply, voice sending shrinks down your spine to your dripping cunt.

Terry dives back in, tongue dipping in and out of your hole at an unforgiving pace. You gripped the sheets, "Yes, just like that." You whisper, feeling yourself get already close.

"Does my good girl need to come?" Terry asked in a whispter, and you nodded, shaking and tense. "I'm so close Terry…can I cum, please?" you whimpered, voice wavering more and more.

"Cum for me, baby," he ordered and you did, crying out his name…shaking from the mindblowing climax. You lay there quietly, trying to get yourself together.

Terry began kissing up your body to your lips, and you moaned tasting the juice of your cum on his tongue. You felt his hand grip your plump waist and wrapping your legs around his waist.

Terry pulled away and smirked, filling you up perfectly; you silently him as he moaned at the feeling of you clenching around him tight.

His forehead leaned against your forehead, pulling out slightly before thrusting back in. The thrusts were slowly and gently, the breathless moans between you, and the music wrapped around you like a warm embrace.

"Shit...baby, you're the best thing that happened to me; you lift me up, love me for who I am, and I'm forever thankful you know that," Terry whispered, kissing your neck.

"Yes, ahhh Terry. I'm so happy I met you on that trip, you give me so I'm thankful for you, too," you whispered, getting emotional as you looked deeply into his beautiful eyes.

Terry wipes your tears away and kisses you for a few minutes before lifting your leg to be on his shoulder to go deeper. "So deep, so fucking deep Terry"

You let out a light moan, placing your hand on the back of your leg to keep it steady as the music drives out the sounds of your skins slapping togather.

"Fuck, I love you baby." Terry moans, leaning his forehead against yours and looking into your eyes deeply, thrusting a little faster, setting a steady rhythm.

"Ah…Terry….I love you, I love so fucking much" You moaned softly, feeling your pussy clenching around his dick. Terry kisses you and feels yourself getting ready to orgasm.

"I'm gonna come," You whispered in a moan, pulling away from the kiss. "You're gonna come, huh? Fuck Me too, baby, I'm gonna fill you up, would like that," He whispers in your ear.

"Yes, yes, fill me up with your come, please, Terry, I need it," You said, pulling him into another kiss as he thrust a few times, and you both came together, muffling each other's names.

You felt the streams of his hot cum dropping out of your pussy once he pulled out. "Mmm, that's all me coming out of you" He smirks, glancing down at your pussy proudly.

You and Terry went to take a warm shower together. The steam filled the small bathroom, creating a cozy atmosphere as you washed away the fantastic sex you just had.

Once you finished, you both slipped into soft pajamas, feeling comfortable and relaxed. As you settled into bed, you turned toward him and rested your head gently on his chest, feeling the steady rhythm of his heartbeat.

Terry wrapped his arms around you, drawing you closer with a tender embrace, his hands softly caressing your arms. At that moment, everything felt right, and you knew nothing could stand in the way of this beautiful love between you both.

[luckyyyduckyyy]

THANKSGIVING MOOTIE APPRECIATION ❤️✨❤️

Happy thanksgiving y'all! And a good time zone to all my non-US/non-Turkey day havers lovelies!

Tis the season of thanks and I'm a very thankful goober this year! I only started getting active on Tumblr about half a year ago and there's already so many people and things I'm grateful for from this site alone! I've enjoyed so much art and events, participated in yap seshes, tag games, and ultimately felt pretty welcomed and at home on this site, and it's thanks to all you! <3<3<3

Special thanks to the DCA fandom in its entirety as well! All the discussions, artists, writers, and shared reposts with all the silly notes are awesome! Y'all inspire me all the time and make me wish I was more outgoing than I am just so I can say hello to each and every one of you!!!!

The list gets long, so for the sake of those scrolling by, I have put it below! Have a lovely day everyone! <3333

@midnight-mourning Your writing is just wonderful. It's everything!!! I adore it so much and your CS boyos have wormed their way into my heart and refuses to leave. Some of my favorite songs even remind me of them! (Don't tell Moon this but I am very attached to CS Sun-)(Honestly gotta be my favorite Sun I've read fr fr) Also! Thank you for just being so supportive, thinking about me in tag games, and giving ALL the tag notes! They're a wonder to read and have me bounce off the walls! I'm always so happy we're mooties! ❤️❤️❤️ (Also, fun fact, you're my first mutual too! It's insane to me HOW DID THIS HAPPEN GUAHPHIAHDKA)

@pointyfruit You! Your art? Muah, wonderful. I don't even care if it's not dca related because it's so good. The shape language, art style, and just unique takes on just anything and everything blows my mind! Let's not forget COLORS. Oml they are so PRETTY. It's like an explosion I never want to end. 💥💥💥 Also! So goofy, so silly, and COTL enjoyer! Let's GOOOOO!!! I don't engage with the fandom much but I DO love the game and honestly I almost beat it, but still have not because I don't wanna do the final boss fight. It can't be over bros... Anyways when I see your posts I always wanna just wave like a neighbor seeing ya blow up 10 boxes of fireworks on a casual Tuesday afternoon. 👋👋👋:D

@divinit3a SPINS YOU!!! 🐶🐕🐶 Heya silly meister! In the midst of reading your work, gotta say? Muwah, Perfecto! The sillies are putting me on a rollercoaster and I'm stuck on the ride! While my ability to yap is a coin flip every hour, you happen to bring the yappening out of me with all the fun notes and posts you do--We've already had so many fun convos! Speaking of posts, the art is peak and will STAY peak! The designs? Muwah. The colors? Muwah. You make even the creepiest of goobers hauntingly beautiful! We've may not have known each other for long, but you're someone I look forward to seeing on my dash/notifications every time I open the app! ❤️❤️❤️

@sinister-sincerely Hi!!!! I'm still sometimes in awe realizing we're mutuals! I really love your work and if I'm in the mood to read something but I don't know what, I tend to turn to Aftersome often, even though I've read both the og and the rewrite! It's like you're the master of writing angst, bitter unrequited feelings, and the strange tenseness but want of confusing relationships. It's gut wrenching and I wish I could write something so evoking! All your stories are amazing and I seriously hope you know that, they're such heavy hitters that they have marked a place in my memory. ❤️ Your art too is wonderful! They don't pop up often but when they do it's a real treat! I love that you use grey scale in a lot of your works and the style is just so pleasing to look at. Whenever I see the DCA in your style I wanna give them the biggest hugs, even if they'd pry me off seconds later! ✨✨✨

@r0b0s-robos / @r0b0-wannabe Waving at you excitedly!!! It's always a pleasure to see your reposts, you always find the good stuff! Plus, you always are trying to help out others and it's amazing to see, your efforts are able to make great impacts. :333 You're also another writer I appreciate immensely, and I'm so invested in your botanist au. The sillies and their botanist who is desperately trying not to fall in love with them!!! ADORE THEM!!! I can't wait to read more! ❤️❤️❤️ The times you post about writing ideas or silly things about the DCA has me nodding my head with a smile. Also, the little notes you leave in tags, despite usually being brief, always makes me so happy! It's like seeing the kind stoic look at you from their seat, let out a small smile, and say "I love this"- and then suddenly it's a blast of blinding white light of endearment straight to my heart. K.O.!

@chickenchirps27 Welcome back!!! I've noticed you've been much more active recently and it's always fun to see what you got goin on! Obligatory art mention, but it would be criminal to NOT mention it. ITS!!! AMAZING!!! THEY LOOK LIKE ROCK CANDY!!! Colors!!! I love it so much, the goobers look delicio- I mean they look adorable and masterfully crafted in each piece of art! And your sona, ugh, she's so gorgeous and alien in the best ways possible. I've never seen anything like her and I am in awe of how you came up with all her little details. Those mantis arms are SICK and I want them!!! (Though drawing may be a little hard if I had em-)✨✨✨

@amarynthian-fortress / @amarynthian-chronicles Hehehe! Boops you! >:D Honestly, thank you for always being the biggest sweetheart around and being so welcoming. You're one of the people that made me feel able to crack my shell more and be more active on here! Your writing is whimsical, your reposts and comments are always so kind and feel-goody, and you just always show you care and the randomest times! Catch me off guard why don't you! I love all the snippets and treats you post, and I'm saving many of your stories to read for rainy days! ❤️❤️❤️

@ping-ski My reaction to us becoming mutuals was- 💥💥💥:OOOOO💥OO💥💥 I think I've followed you right when I started getting active on here and gah, your art is wonderful. So lovely, stylized, and colored so simply yet so appealingly that I can't stop looking. Your aus make me want to read them and their designs are always top tier! Also, I cannot forget to mention you are SILLAY!!! So silly! Your comments on reposts are goofy and I love to read them whenever they come up on my dash! Not to mention your own posts- I will never forget the 3-in-1 solid block of dca encased in ice. I was in awe of seeing them encased and I suddenly wanted my own dca ice cubes to put into a drink and try not to choke on. ✨✨✨

@quilteddreamz Your writing. Oh my GOSH your writing! It's wonderful, beautiful, gah, I can't wait for your advent calender! I wish I could do something for it but I got 3 more weeks of large projects tapped to my back. I am sending much luck your way and know that I am excited to enjoy some daily dca! Don't break yourself over it too! I may adore the goobers but you're most adored first! Take care and keep being such a whimsical person! Muwah! ✨✨✨

@flowysgonemad You are also! Silly!!! You are so fun to see popping around my dash and your doodles just make me go :333 every time! I love your aus and you're a very kind/goofy person! I don't even remember how we became mutuals but garsh diggity dang it, it's awesome to see ya and anything you yap about!

There are MANY more mooties I want to appreciate and show off, but I fear I am currently omw to go to a large thanksgiving dinner and I'm expecting to be there for the rest of the day. SO! If you weren't listed, please know that I AM thinking of you! Have a wonderful time zone, and just know that my heart is so full knowing that you're all there! I can't believe there is that many of you to begin with that I can't fit you all within the time frame! (Would you believe me if I said coming up with all the right words to say here took me 2 1/2 hours?)

So! To all my beloved writers, artists, and sillies alike! From the bottom of my heart, really, thank you! For being here, even reading this, and appreciating the things I do as much as I appreciate you! ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️✨✨✨✨✨✨

[notiddygothgf]

16. Right Here

★ pairings: aki hayakawa x fem reader

★ ❝ I want a divorce. ❞

★ c.w.: drinking, mentions of domestic violence

★ a/n: hello my dumplings. i'm FINALLY on thanksgiving break. im so grateful for you all! So grateful, in fact, that i wanted to show you all just how much ily with a new chapter. sorry i left y'all hanging for so long! you know i hate to be that way lmfao. the plot is thickeningggggg!! i hope you all love this one! please comment and vote and interact with me, i love u all so dearly. muah! enjoy!

★ w.c: .4.5k

shameless ; chapter index

The words felt like concrete falling off of your tongue – simultaneously good and bad. On one hand, you felt lighter, freer now that the words had been said. On the other… 

You were fucking terrified of your husband.

A second ticked by as the color drained from his face. Then another. Then another.

Then, slowly, like he couldn’t believe a word you had just said, he licked his lips, asking, “What… the hell are you talking about right now?”

Hold your ground. You had been waiting years to say the words. So why did it feel like your mouth was stuffed full of cotton when you tried to protest?

“Is it the fighting?” He asked.

You shook your head, “No. No, it’s more than just the fighting, Tanimoto. I’m tired– tired of you treating me like shit all of the fucking time,” You paused to take a deep, trembling breath. You wondered briefly if Aki could hear you, submerged in a deep slumber only a couple of feet away. “I’m a person with– with rights and… I won’t– I’m not going to keep living like this.”

You swallowed down the lump in your throat, repeating yourself – albeit much more quietly, “I want a divorce.”

Divorce. Why did it sound so wrong?

He looked as if he felt the same way. Thin lips pulled into a tight scowl, brows furrowed, eyes wide, he opened his mouth – but before the words could come out, the door slid open. 

It was Himeno, sporting a warm smile and her signature eyepatch – with a bored-looking Denji in tow. When she recognized you, her eyes lit up. Denji did not appear to share the same sentiment, muttering, “Are we interrupting somethin’?”

Yes.

“No,” You smiled instead. This is my way out. Turning to your husband, you put on a bright smile – the same one you always wore when you played the part of “loving wife”. “He was just about to leave, actually. Right?”

The tension in the room thickened like fog, heavy and unyielding. Your husband stood there, silent and unmoving, his expression unreadable. Then, slowly, like a man reeling in a snapping leash, he smoothed his features.

“Right,” he said, his tone unnervingly calm.

He dipped his head in a polite bow, but as he straightened, he leaned in close—too close. His breath was warm against your ear, his voice a quiet blade. “We’re talking about this later,” he muttered, the promise heavy with an unspoken threat.

Then he turned and walked out, his footsteps fading into the hall.

The moment the door closed behind him, your shoulders sagged, and you let out a shaky sigh of relief. For the first time in what felt like hours, you could breathe again. He’s gone.

Why do I feel so light?

The hospital room was sterile and quiet now, the only sound the faint hum of the air conditioning and the soft beep of the monitor beside Aki’s bed. The fluorescent lights overhead cast everything in a washed-out, almost dreamlike hue. It felt cold despite the layers of blankets draped over him, and you found yourself wrapping your arms around your torso, trying to ward off the chill.  

Aki lay there, pale and unmoving, his face finally free of its usual sharp tension. It should’ve been a relief to see him at peace, but all you could think about was how hard he’d pushed himself to get here. Did you hear that, Aki? you wondered. I finally said it.

Your thoughts were interrupted by Denji’s voice breaking the stillness. “What was that all about?” he asked, his wide eyes darting to the door your husband had walked out of moments earlier. “Did you guys finally break up or somethin’?”  

“Denji,” Himeno snapped, her voice sharp enough to cut through steel. She perched on the arm of the couch across from you, her gaze flicking between you and Aki. “Read the room, for god’s sake.”  

“What? I’m just asking,” Denji muttered, sinking into a chair next to Aki’s bedside with his arms crossed.

You forced a laugh, though it came out thin and hollow. “It’s… a long story. We can talk about it later.”  

Himeno studied you for a moment, her sharp eyes softening. “Okay,” she said quietly. “But we’re circling back to this.” Then she sighed and ran a hand through her hair. “You missed one hell of a day today.”

Denji’s mood shifted instantly, his grin wide and boyish. “Oh, yeah! It was crazy! You should’ve seen me—I was slicing through mini-devils left and right!”  

“The only thing that was crazy was you,” Himeno corrected, rolling her eyes. “Don’t let him fool you. He was flailing around like a maniac half the time.”  

“Who gives a shit how I did it? What matters is that I did it,” Denji shot back, leaning forward. “Tell her about the big one! The giant… uh… whatever it was!”  

“The Lunch Devil,” Himeno said grimly, crossing her arms. “It was huge—took out half a block before we even got close. Looked like something out of a nightmare, with all those teeth and—”  

“And it kept spitting out smaller devils!” Denji interrupted, his arms flailing for emphasis. “But they weren’t even small. More like dog-sized. They were everywhere. It was like—like—”  

“Like an infestation,” Himeno finished dryly. “The thing wasn’t just attacking. It was setting up shop, spreading itself across the area. We had to cut through all the smaller ones just to get a shot at the main body.”  

Denji beamed. “But I got the kill shot! I jumped right onto its ugly face and went – BAM! Chainsaws everywhere!” He mimed slashing wildly, complete with exaggerated sound effects. 

You couldn’t help but smile faintly at his enthusiasm. “Sounds like it was a mess.”  

“That’s an understatement,” Himeno said, her voice dropping. “We lost four people out there. It could’ve been worse, honestly. The thing was stronger than we expected. And smarter.”  

Denji’s grin faltered slightly. “Yeah… those guys didn’t stand a chance. It was like the devil knew exactly how to mess with us.”  

Himeno nodded, her expression grim. “It was baiting us, drawing us into traps. It knew how to split us up, how to isolate the weaker ones. And once we were scattered…” Her gaze drifted to Aki, and her shoulders slumped. 

“He’s alright, at least,” you murmured, your eyes following hers. “Always the hero.”  

“Yeah, and now look at him,” Himeno said, her voice softening. “He’s lucky he’s not in worse shape.”  

You glanced at Aki again, his face pale against the crisp white of the hospital pillow. He looked fragile in a way that unsettled you. How many more times can he do this before he breaks completely? 

Denji shifted in his seat, breaking your train of thought. “It wasn’t all bad, though, right? I mean, we got the thing in the end.”  

“We did,” Himeno said, though her voice lacked conviction. “But at what cost?”  

The room fell into a heavy silence. You watched Aki’s chest rise and fall with each slow, steady breath, as if anchoring yourself to the rhythm.  

You broke the silence with a quiet murmur of, “Can I… talk to you, Himeno?”

After a moment, Himeno turned to you, her expression softening. “‘Course.”

Denji groaned, throwing his head back. 

“Go grab a snack or something,” Himeno said, waving him off. “We’ll be back in a minute.”  

“Fine, whatever,” Denji muttered, dragging himself out of the chair. His footsteps stomped down the hall, growing fainter with each step.  

You motioned for Himeno to follow you a few steps away from Aki’s bedside. The hum of the air conditioning seemed louder now, filling the space as you struggled to find the right words.  

“So,” Himeno began, crossing her arms. “What’s going on? Is this about earlier?”  

You hesitated, your hands twisting together nervously. Finally, you took a deep breath and said it. “Himeno, I told him I want a divorce.”  

Her eyes widened, her jaw dropping slightly. “Wait—what? When did this happen?”  

“Just now,” you admitted, your voice quiet. “It’s been building up for a while, but… I finally said it.”  

Himeno stared at you, clearly floored. “Holy crap. I mean, good for you, but… wow. What did he say? Did he—was that why he was acting so weird?”  

“He didn’t take it well,” you said with a weak laugh. “But I didn’t expect him to.”  

Himeno shook her head, still processing. “You’ve been dealing with all that, and then you walk into this mess… Damn. You really can’t catch a break.”  

You shrugged, a wry smile tugging at your lips. “I wanted to ask you if I could possibly stay the night. I’m dreading going back to the hotel. He told me he wants to talk more about it, but I don’t know.”

Himeno smiled, and she placed a hand on your shoulder. “Of course you can. We’ll talk more later. No more questions, for now.”  

“Thank you,” you said quietly, the knot in your chest loosening just a little.  

The two of you turned to Aki, silently watching the rise and fall of his chest, as if that would bring him back.

“For what it’s worth,” Himeno added, her voice gentle, “I think you’re doing the right thing.”  

The corner of your mouth lifted in a weak smile. For the first time in a while, you believed it too.  

Himeno’s apartment looked exactly like the way you had expected it to look. It was clean, save for a few cases of beer here and there. An open kitchenette – not entirely unlike Aki’s – and a sliding door that led to a balcony. It seemed a little big for just one person. 

And, in the middle of it all, you were hunched over a stool at her kitchen island, swirling an empty can of beer around on a coaster. Himeno was opening the takeout bag (Chinese, as per her request), setting little containers onto the counter while you watched her work. She had long since changed out of her Public Safety uniform, having showered and swapped the suffocating suit and tie for a cami top and some gray sleep shorts. She lent you one of her tee shirts and a pair of shorts to wear for the evening. You hadn’t exactly had time to pack.

(You didn’t want to think about going back to the hotel room to retrieve your luggage).

“Steamed Dumplings and White Rice,” She hummed, setting two large cartons down in front of you, along with a pair of cheap bamboo chopsticks – the kind the restaurants gave you for free. She placed two cartons of her own in front of you. Leaning over the table so she could be eye-to-eye. “You want another beer?”

“God, yes,” You sighed. 

With an airy laugh, she tugged the refrigerator open and produced two more cans of that wonderful substance that made you feel a little lighter. One for you and one for her.

She popped the cap on her bottle, taking a swig. “So,” She sighed. “Divorce. That’s a serious word. Tell me how it happened.”

“It just kinda… slipped out, I ‘dunno,” You glanced down at your meal, suddenly feeling a lot less keen about eating it. Still, Himeno had treated you to food – something she didn’t have to do. So, feeling obligated to do so, you popped open the carton of rice and the carton of dumplings and dug in. “It’s not that I didn’t mean it though. I’ve been thinking about it for a long time. He treats me like shit.”

“I hear ‘ya,” She hummed in response. She popped a piece of chicken into her mouth. “I remember you saying you were thinkin’ about it. What broke the camel’s back?”

Tell her the truth.

You bit the inside of your cheek, finally speaking up about what you had been holding back for so long, “He hit me, Himeno. He’s been getting more and more violent with me.”

Your friend’s eye grew to the size of a saucer. Still, there was something akin to sympathy behind it, and she remained silent.

“I told him about us… About me and Aki,” You added. Already, you could feel the tears prickling at the corners of your eyes. “I told him I’d been having an affair, and that we love each other.”

Her lips parted. A moment later, she stuffed a wad of rice between them, and then washed it down with a gulp of beer. “Shit, girl.”

“It had to happen at some point,” you said, your voice trembling slightly. “After everything that happened today, I just couldn’t take it anymore. So I came clean.”

“Is that why you started the divorce?” she asked gently.

You nodded, gripping the edge of the counter. “He gave me an ultimatum,” you said bitterly. “Told me to leave Aki. Said if I ever wanted to keep my life in Kyoto, I had to cut ties with him completely.”

“And you said no?”

“Of course I did,” you said firmly, though the memory of his threats still made your stomach churn. “I was scared at first—terrified, really. But then I thought about it. Really thought about it. And I realized… I’d rather die than live without Aki.” You shook your head, a faint smile tugging at your lips. “We’re in love.”

Himeno’s expression softened, a genuine smile breaking through. “I can see that,” she said. “And I really am glad. He needs someone like you in his life. Someone who cares the way you do.”

“You think so?” you asked, your voice tentative.

“I know so,” she said confidently. “I’ve never seen anyone make that boy show as much emotion as you have in such a short time. That’s a talent, chica.” She pointed a chopstick at you before taking another bite. “You did the right thing.”

“I can only hope,” you murmured, the knot in your chest loosening slightly. You took another sip of beer, letting the alcohol ease the lingering tension. “But enough about me. How have you been holding up?”

Himeno shrugged, a playful smile returning to her lips. “I’ve been good. Been obsessed with this soap opera lately. Would you be up to finishing it with me?”

You laughed, the sound lighter than you’d expected. “Fuck yeah.”

“Great,” she said, pushing off the counter and heading for the TV. She crouched on the floor, rummaging through a small stack of DVDs. “No more talk about divorce tonight. The only relationship drama you need to worry about is the drama between Aika and Satoshi.”

You raised an eyebrow. “Who the hell are Aika and Satoshi?”

She grinned, sliding a disc into the player. “You’re about to find out.”

As the screen flickered to life, you leaned back in your stool, letting the warmth of the moment wash over you. For the first time in what felt like forever, you allowed yourself to relax, even if just for a little while. For a moment, things felt like they were the way they had been nearly a decade earlier – just you and Himeno against the world.

When you got the call the next morning at 5 AM that Aki had woken up (and, yes, you had slept with your phone right next to your head), you lept off of the couch and threw one of Himeno’s sweaters on – deciding you would tell her later. You called a taxi only a minute later and, within ten minutes, you were out the door.

Now, walking the halls with your heart pounding in your chest, you couldn’t have felt more awake. A name badge on your chest and your heart in your hands, you tried to remember what room the nurse had told you to find him in. Was it 104? 105? 

Who knows. The only thing on your mind right then was the words ‘He’s alive. He’s okay.’ on repeat.

In fact, you continued to repeat those words like a mantra right up until you reached the room at the very end of the stale hallway, secluded from the rest of the hospital rooms on that floor. Room 105.

It was his room. It had to be.

So, with your heartbeat racing a mile a minute, you knocked twice. A moment passed, some fabric shifted on the other side of the door – and you wondered for a moment if you even had the right room. But, then, clear as day, you heard that damned voice.

“Come in.”

It was him. 

He’s okay, you thought. He’s okay. He’s okay. He’s okay.

And, obeying his order, you opened the door, peeking your head in. There he was, sitting upright in his hospital bed, hair down and a little messy, donning nothing but a blue hospital gown. His heartbeat was beeping steadily on the monitor next to his bed – a beep-beep sound that soothed you, reminded you that this was all real. 

The moment he saw you, his eyes widened. That stoic ‘Captain’ look melted away from his face in a moment’s width, tired gaze softening, as it softened into something much more familiar. (In contrast, the heart rate on the monitor kicked up a few notches – something you couldn’t help but revel in).

“Hey, troublemaker,” He grinned.

And, suddenly, you couldn’t care less about where you were or what you were wearing. You closed the door behind you, practically running towards Aki’s bed and grabbing him by the hand. It felt so good to feel him – his warmth, his liveliness after a whole day of radio silence.

But, before you could reply, his arms were around your waist, tugging you into bed with him until your chest was pressed up against his, legs dangling in the air.

“Aki–” You laughed breathlessly, scrambling for footing before eventually succumbing to him. You climbed further onto the bed (even though you knew you shouldn’t) and collapsed on top of him. 

He brought his arms even tighter around you, like a protective jacket, and groaned into your hair, “Missed you so fuckin’ much.”

The two of you stayed there for a moment – bodies smushed together like lovestruck teenagers, feet dangling in the air – lying chest-to-chest.

He pressed a kiss to the top of your head, “I’d kiss you, but I’m thirsty as hell and I’m, like, 90 percent sure they didn’t brush my teeth.”

You smiled up at him, up at his pretty face – smiled so hard your eyes crinkled at the corners. Then, you cupped his face, uttering, “I don’t give a shit. Come here,” and brought him in for a long awaited kiss. It was everything you had imagined and so much more. It was passionate, it was longing, it was love. He breathed color right back into your lungs, filled you with the will you had lacked.

You deepened the kiss, tangling a hand in his hair and–

The steady beeping of his heart monitor picked up to a much quicker pace. You parted from him quickly, worried you had set something off in your haste to make sure he knew how much you missed him. The screen looked normal – and the heart rate slowed back to a normal pace after you spent a moment catching your breath.

“Sorry,” He chuckled. “Got excited.”

With a laugh, you slid off of him. “Are you hurt? How do you feel?”

He groaned, laying his pretty head back against the pillow, “Like hell. Better, now that you’re here, though. Anything happen while I was asleep?”

“I told my husband about us,” you said softly, your voice trembling despite your best efforts.

Aki stiffened. You could practically feel his muscles tense, his whole body going rigid. He leaned back slightly, his tired eyes searching yours. “When?” he asked, his voice measured, but the subtle edge of anxiety was unmistakable.

You swallowed hard, the words catching in your throat. “Yesterday. Right here at your bedside, actually.”

His brows furrowed as he shifted to sit up straighter, ignoring the wince that flickered across his face. “What happened when you told him?” 

Your gaze dropped to the blanket pooled around his waist, and you took a steadying breath. “Well… he asked first,” you began. “After that wall blew in, and I thought I was gonna lose you…” Your voice cracked, and you pressed your lips together to steady it. “I was a mess, Aki. I stayed with you until help came. Made sure they got you to the hospital.” 

Aki’s hand moved to your knee, his thumb tracing soothing circles as he watched you intently. His silence was patient, but it only made the confession harder. 

“He came in later that day,” you continued, your voice barely above a whisper. “After I was discharged. He asked if there was something going on between us.”

“And?” Aki’s voice was low, steady, but the way his hand tightened around yours betrayed the tension he was trying to hide.

You met his eyes, your own brimming with tears. “I told him yes. I told him I was having an affair.”

A sharp exhale escaped him, and he ran a hand through his already-messy hair, his eyes darting to the ceiling as he processed your words. “Shit,” he muttered, shaking his head. “How’d he react?”

A humorless laugh slipped out, your shoulders shaking with the weight of it. “Not well, obviously,” you said. “First thing he did was hit me.”

Aki froze, his gaze snapping back to you. The warmth in his eyes was replaced by a fiery anger that made your chest tighten. Still, ever the great listener, he said nothing, sitting up in his bed.

You nodded, swallowing hard. “And then he told me…” Your voice wavered, and you forced a shaky laugh, trying to keep the tears at bay. “He thinks I can go on living without you. He told me I need to stop seeing you.”

Aki shifted slowly, the sharp inhale of his breath telling you that even this small movement caused him pain. He sat up in the hospital bed, his arms pulling you closer, and before you could protest about him overexerting himself, he buried his face into the crook of your neck. The warmth of his breath against your skin sent a shiver down your spine, and the tension in his body melted away as he held you like you were his lifeline.  

“No, we can’t,” he murmured, his voice muffled but resolute. His arms tightened around you, his nose brushing against your collarbone. “We can’t.” 

“I know,” you whispered, your hands finding their way to his hair. You cradled the back of his head, your fingers threading gently through the soft strands as you pressed a kiss to the crown of it. He smelled like antiseptic and something distinctly him, something grounding and familiar that made your heart ache. “I’d rather die.” 

The weight of those words hung between you, the truth of them sinking deeper than either of you wanted to admit. Aki didn’t reply, just held you a little tighter, his shoulders trembling faintly under your hands. For a moment, you stayed like that, the two of you lost in the fragile stillness of the room, the sound of his heartbeat monitor the only thing grounding you in reality.  

You broke the silence, your voice trembling as you spoke. “I’m scared, Aki. I’m frightened. I don’t know what— I don’t know what he’s capable of.”

His hold on you shifted slightly, his arms loosening just enough for him to pull back and meet your gaze. His eyes, sharp and soft all at once, searched for yours. There was a flicker of guilt there—guilt for not being able to protect you from everything. 

“Don’t be scared,” he said, his voice low and firm, yet laced with an aching tenderness. His hands cupped your face, thumbs brushing gently against your cheeks as he leaned in closer. “You’ve got me, now. I’ll keep you safe. Promise.”  

You swallowed hard, the lump in your throat making it difficult to speak. “You won’t be much help like this,” you managed, nodding toward the IV in his arm and the fresh bandages peeking out from under the hospital gown. “Plus… I crashed at Himeno’s last night. I can’t run away from him forever.”

For the first time since the conversation began, Aki’s lips curved into a faint grin, one that you could feel as his nose brushed against your neck again. “I’m supposed to be discharged today,” he murmured, his voice teasing but gentle. His arms slid around your waist again, pulling you flush against him. “Come stay with me.”

"Then don't," he whispered, his breath warm against your lips. He tasted like cigarette smoke, beer and mint gum – a flavor so utterly addicting that you couldn't seem to get enough of it. "Don't think. Let me take you back to your room."

You hesitated, the reality of the situation hitting you. This was crossing a line, a line you couldn't uncross. But as you looked into his eyes, saw the same turmoil reflected back at you, you felt your resolve crumble. 

You were tired of pretending.

"Okay," you whispered, your voice barely audible over the rain. It was a final, resigned acceptance, the last nail in the coffin of your restraint.

“Aki…” you started, but he cut you off with a soft hum. “I have all of my shit at the hotel.”

“We can buy more,” he said simply, his tone leaving no room for argument.  

You bit your lip, shaking your head slightly. “There’s that get-together later this week,” you began, your voice trailing off as you considered the fallout, the logistics, the mess of it all.  

Aki’s hand left your waist, his fingers brushing against your cheek and coaxing you to look at him. His touch was light, almost hesitant, but the intensity in his gaze left no doubt about how serious he was. “You’ll be with me,” he said softly. “I won’t let him hurt you.” His thumb traced the curve of your cheekbone as his other hand slid back to your waist. “Stop worrying about him. Come home with me.”

The words hit you like a memory, a flash of that first night when you’d whispered something so similar to him. The thought made your throat tighten, and for a moment, you couldn’t find the words to respond. Your mind raced through the implications, the risks, the dangers—but when you looked into his eyes, all of that faded into the background.

“I can’t live without you, Aki,” you whispered, your voice cracking as the weight of the truth settled over you.  

He nodded slowly, his hand sliding back to the nape of your neck as he pressed his forehead to yours. “You don’t have to,” he murmured. “I’m right here.”

The tears you’d been holding back spilled over, and you melted into his embrace, letting the steady beat of his heart and the warmth of his arms remind you of what mattered most. 

He’s right here.

a/n: She held her ground.... I WANTED TO END IT ON A HAPPY NOTE after the way i left yall hanging last time lolllllll. the plot will be getting thicka and thicka and the drama will be getting juicier from here on out. stay tuned for that! (Also, this is the longest fanfic ive ever written officially LMFAOAO idk how i thought this shit was gonna be a short story....) anyway!! stay safe, i hope you are all having a wonderful sangsgibing if you celebrate. mama loves yall xxx

credits: UNKOWN ATM. I found the cover pic on pinterest unfortch. If you know the artist, please let me know, so I can credit them properly for their work!!! This is NOT MY BEAUTIFUL DRAWINGGG. I obviously do not own csm or anything related to it. please do not reproduce, copy, or translate my works anywhere. dont fk w me im a bruja.

also: come find me on my wattpad if u wanna interact more!

taglist: @mitsuyeahhh , @sleepysnk , @enneadec , @noaabean , @em1e , @drakensdarling , @bertholdts--butt , @satanlovesusall666 , @mitsuwuyaa , @noctifule , @scaraphobia , @ask-the-insect-hashira , @lovingranchturkeyweasel , @bontensbabygirl , @slvdsjjk , @novacrystalli , @hanmastattoos , @kodzuksn , @hqtiny , @ohmaiscool15 , @redlittlequeen , @leivane , @goldeneagles-posts , @yeahblahlame , @no-oneelsebutnsu , @cookiesandcreammy , @cawwn , @the-haitani-baton , @littlelovebug98 , @armani78 , @mindurownbussines , @kokos-property , @violetmatcha , @hp-simp505 , @acethebrave , @mitsuyeahhh , @sleepysnk , @enneadec , @noaabean , @em1e , @drakensdarling , @bertholdts--butt , @satanlovesusall666 , @mitsuwuyaa , @noctifule , @scaraphobia , @ask-the-insect-hashira , @lovingranchturkeyweasel , @bontensbabygirl , @slvdsjjk , @novacrystalli , @hanmastattoos , @kodzuksn , @hqtiny , @ohmaiscool15 , @redlittlequeen , @leivane , @goldeneagles-posts , @yeahblahlame , @no-oneelsebutnsu , @cookiesandcreammy , @cawwn , @the-haitani-baton , @littlelovebug98 , @armani78 , @mindurownbussines , @kokos-property , @violetmatcha , @hp-simp505

wanna join the taglist? | shameless ; chapter index

[simp-ly-writes]

The Comments Section (pt.8)

─────── · · A Social Media AU Fic

Pairing: Spencer Agnew x gn!Reader

─ · · SUMMARY: after taking some time away from the spotlight, you return to surprise friends and fans alike with your more recent updates...

─ · · TAGS: gender-neutral pronouns, slowburn, fluff, light angst, cheesiness, friends that act like lovers, friends to lovers, mutual pining, attempt at humour, social media au.

─ · · MASTERLIST | TAGLIST REQUEST | PART SIX | PART SEVEN | PART NINE

─ · · A/N: can't believe its been over a month since the last update, sorry about that y'all 😬 but hope you enjoy this part!

─────── · ·

🔔 (name)s_username just posted for the first time in awhile.

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Liked by co_mill, spennser, sydney_sweeney, and others

(name)s_username Hey... so it's been awhile. I've taken time away from the internet and from the cameras to focus on myself and on my relationships and in that time I realized how far I was pushing myself and other's away from me.

I will be taking a step away from my on-screen role(s) at Smosh since it is not fair to you, the fans or to anyone working at Smosh to work around my schedule. I will try and make guest appearances if I can and I'm sorry if I ever got your hopes up for things to go back to where they started but I hope that at least some of you will come out to support my new projects and I understand fully if you cannot.

Thank you to my team, my friends at Smosh, Sydney and Glen, and to Spencer for always being there for me. I know that I have not been myself these past few months but I think I'm finally finding what I need so stay tuned for a more happy update later lol.

Love you all!

View all 7,342 comments

username01 Always supported you and always will, (name)! Hope you find what you're looking for 💕

co_mill gonna miss having you, bestie! But I can already see how much happier you are and that makes me happy! 😊

↳ (name)s_username you're so sweet. I'll miss you too, bestie! 🥹🫶

username44 eh, still does not make up for everything. I felt like you used Spencer and Smosh to make your "career."

username70 Mixed feeling about this but wishing you the best!

anthonypadilla your dads are here to give you a virtual hug goodbye, so here it is!

↳ ian_hecox yeah, best hug you ever had here: ↳ (name)s_username I can feel it! 🤣

username22 I don't know about you, but I'm feeling dust in my eyes! I'm sad to see (name) go but if they can be like an Olivia or Keith- I can live with that ❤️

angelagiovanagiarratana wait so you're LEAVING? WTF GUYS why does nobody ever tell me anything?!? Like good for you bestie, you get that mental health back on track but seriously? I had to come here from twitter to learn this 😭

↳ (name)s_username Girl! I left you a voice memo yesterday 👀 ↳ angelagiovanagiarratana oh shit, I thought that was spam 😬 ↳ username30 OMG LMAO!!! 🤣

username88 I was so worried about you! Happy to know you're back on the up and up again 💕

shayne_topp you're gonna kill it out there but you'll always have a seat at smosh cast to tell me and Amanda all about it!

↳ (name)s_username give me a month or two and I will be there lol ↳ shayne_topp counting on it!

filmingamanda happy post you say? 😉

tomeybones who's gonna cry with my in the bathroom now??

spennser 🫶

↳ (name)s_username 🫶

─────── · ·

🔔 SmoshGames just uploaded! Turn off notifications here.

─────── · ·

Thank you (Name)!

Smosh Games ✓ [Subscribed] 👍 4k | 👎 7.75M subscribers 1.1M views 2 days ago #2 on trending a complication of (name) moments from over the years... click to expand

5,992 Comments

⚲ Pinned by Creator Smosh Games ✓ From a decade of on and off-camera shenanigans, everyone here at Smosh wishes (name) the very best! (even though we are jealous others get to work with them too). Be sure to comment your favourite memory/moment of (name)!

username01 this feels like a bad break-up since you're still in love with them lol 😭

↳ username61 you know that this is going to happen with everyone one day but you never expect today. fuck i'm going to miss them. * [this comment has been censored for interfering with Youtube's Community Guidelines; for more information press HERE]

username30 everyone is out here acting like they died. PEOPLE (NAME) IS GOING TO COME BACK FOR SPECIALS DONT WORRY! god.

username24 I still think back to that hide and seek video, I hope that future update comfirms (yourshipname) for good!

username77 "don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened"

username11 (name) falling over and accidentally discovering what is cake by face plant will never not be the best moment on this channel 🤣

username40 where are all the "#imdonewith(name)" people now?? Sure to have changed their tune quickly...

(yourshipname)updates ✓ any moment with (name) and Spencer is a certified classic for Smosh. I mean they are the Shayne and Courtney of nerds.

username09 I was so scared that (name) was going to fall into that Hollywood lifestyle... happy yo know that they're still there.

username52 "this isn't goodbye, it's see you later" - and I'm counting on it for (name)'s return!

─────── · ·

🔔 (name)s_username just posted, check it out!

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Liked by spennser, ian_hecox, tomeybones and others

(name)s_username good company, 9/10, could have talked more about movies but was too caught up on video games. idk if I would recommend for anyone else 😬

View all 3,229 comments

username01 (name) be having the most aesthetic blog possible in this new era and I'm here for it 💕

spennser decided to take out the image of my soul-crushing win?

↳ (name)s_username no! I left it in right beside you almost face planting if you scroll to the left 😄 ↳ spennser ☹️ ↳ (name)s_username 😂 ↳ username40 I seriously cannot tell if this is a soft launch or them just being dumbasses again...

username80 just two friends spending casual friend time together... right? right? right? 👀

damien_Hass why wasn't I invited??? you know how much I love bowling!

↳ (name)s_username next time 100%!

filmingamanda I think I used to work in a bowling alley... then again maybe it was mini golf place. Anyways cute pictures!!

username30 eh, I'll count this as a win for (yourshipname).

username00 WHY ARE WE ALL SO CALM, THIS IS A SOFT LAUNCH PEOPLE. A. SOFT. LAUNCH. You heard it here first, folks!

username11 waiting on Spencers post now to confirm it but AAAAAHHHHHHHHHH. Has the angst finally stopped for some fluff???

username16 Love how all the regular comments are being stationed at the top for us shippers to be down in the trenches analyzing every image.

username19 " idk if I would recommend for anyone else..." mhmm yup, you take that man!

─────── · ·

🔔 This post is getting a lot of likes! Check it out!

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Liked by (name)s_username, anthonypadilla, filmingamanda and others

spennser do the math- the answer's probably right.

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(name)s_username so lets see here, college meet-up + years working together - a few years and months apart x some texts = ...

↳ spennser I mean I would format it a bit differently but I came to the same conclusion 🤷 ↳ username60 now they are just playing with us, what is this curelty??!?! Spit. it. out. already. please!

username24 so the answer I got was "and then they kissed," am I right?

username00 I've always hated math.

↳ tomeybones fuck! someone already took my caption!

co_mill the math is mathing so hard rn.

shayne_topp so... beopordy (math edition) next?

username01 only real fans will remember that 1st picture 🫶

filimgamanda I've never felt older in a comment's section till now, WTF is a "soft launch"

↳ ian_hecox ummm, its when Nasa tries to send off something or something like that ↳ filimgamanda oh, okay! ↳ username40 its like watching two robots communicate with one another 😭 ↳ username10 not another Harambe situation again!!

username43 Alexa? please order me another three bottles of wine. we're gonna need them...

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─ · · A/N: only two more parts to go!

─ · · SPENCER AGNEW TAGLIST: @lisiliely @missflufffanfics @little-stitious-studios @thejourneyneverendsx @sibsteria @lizzylynch1 @babble2 @delaneyburghardt @thevintagefangirl @uniquely-haunting @maricarorp @sarahskywalker-amidala @laurasdrey

[itsrlymine]

Hi so I cried over a space heater today.. crazy way to start an anon ask but I just had to tell you. Similar to many other anons, I discovered manifestation in 2020 and 4 years later I never manifested a single thing. I found your account 2 (?) weeks ago. I was hesitant to binge your account bc I was trying to break that habit but your bluntness in how simple this all was kept me reading. I thought about what you said for a couple days and decided to try again after all this time with a list of things but I got really anxious so I stopped. I was so anxious to try bc I worried about the cycle I’ve been in for 4 years.

So anyways randomly on Monday my space heater broke. I was looking online for a higher quality one and they were too expensive for me to buy rn so I almost settled for a cheap one until I thought about your account and the way you worded things. So I said to myself “Why am I looking at space heaters when my mom already bought me the highest quality one on this site?”. That’s how you typically answer anons. Just this matter of fact way of talking. For the next following days I would get cold asf and feel so angry and doubtful but then I kept saying. “It sucks but at least my space heater is on the way” and moved on. Guess what? This morning my mom called me and said “Your space heater is downstairs” my heart literally skipped a beat I was like “Space heater?” And she said “Yeah I bought new ones for the house”.

I ran downstairs and GIRL. It was the most expensive, high quality one from the site that I SAID at $80 w a remote control. I started crying because I finally manifested by just going back to the basics. No void, no scripting, no setting time aside to affirm, no states. Just stating that I have it and persisting whenever it came up. Nothing else. Even if I felt doubtful, persist. I’m so grateful for you. And I’m warm in my room now. I feel so motivated to manifest other things. Never change the way you talk. We need the bluntness. 💗

Omg babe!!🥹🥹🥹 This warmed my heart (no pun intended LMAO). Awe don't beat yourself up about whether or not you have "been" manifesting things or not. Everything is now so the past doesn't matter bc it's not real until you make it. I hope you know you are now a master manifestor!!!

It makes me feel so many things inside when y'all tell me you think of me and refocus omggg!

"Just stating that I have it and persisting whenever it came up. Nothing else." AND THAT'S ITTTTT. THAT'S ALLL IT TAKES I SWEAR!!! Nothing else needs to be done bc everything is done!!!!!

I am so elated that I've been able to help you in some way but it's even more amazing now that you know you hold all the power!!. I won't change bc I get to experience beautiful stories like this!! Thank you my love!!!!

[ghostboyjules]

rose, sage, slate (platonically), lavender, peach, and sky <3

I love you buddyyyyyy <3333

THHYYYYMMEEEE!!!!!! ILYYYY!!!! you're literally the absolute goddamn SWEETEST I love you so much I just wanna smoosh you to my cheek in a big hug , you're the absolute BESTEST. you deserve all the good things, and if I can be sweet to you in this lifetime then I am lucky and privileged to do so 😌😌

let's go explore and find cool things and lay in fields 💕💕

[tagarilaghost]

I SWEAR CELEBI'S THINGY IS COMING SOON BUT I REALLY WANTED TO POST THIS ALRIGHT

yeaah... future trio got me too...

and Darkrai is there too, because of course he is.

hey look i drew a cute Drifloon :D

...ignore the rest

whatever started at Darkrai doodles ended in brainrot of future trio + darkrai and I'm blaming @scribz-ag24 for this

[fishofthewoods]

Oh my god I woke up this morning and my Stardew Valley meta post had almost 150 notes????? Hello?????????? Anyways I started writing this last night because @moon-is-pretty-tonight left nice tags on the original so thank you so much!!

We know from the starting scenes of the game that the farmer's grandfather loved Stardew Valley. So why did he leave? Pelican Town is a good place to grow old; George and Evelyn are just fine. It's a fine place to raise a kid, but maybe he just wanted to raise his child closer to real schools and other children.

Or maybe, just maybe, he understood.

Was there a day when he was in his thirties where he looked at his friends and realized they weren't like him? That he could run faster than them, work longer, explore deeper into the hidden places of the valley?

Was there a day when he went to the wizard to ask him for help, for knowledge if nothing else? Did he learn then that his family was different? Special? Chosen? And how did he react? He couldn't possibly raise a child in the valley if they would be as strange and fey as him. He had to leave. There was no other way.

But years later, on his deathbed, did he regret that choice?

Is that why he gave the farmer the letter?

Is that why they went back home?

When the farmer steps off the bus that first day, the valley is still on the cusp of winter, just barely tipping over into spring. The flowers are starting to bloom, but a chill still hangs in the air. As soon as the farmer's boots touch the soil there's a change. The air gets warmer. The trees get greener. Not by too much, not all at once, but it changes.

The junimos watch the farmer as they do their work. They're new to farming, but take to it with frightening speed; their first batch of crops is perfect. None of the townsfolk tell them that parsnips don't normally grow in less than a week, that cauliflowers don't grow to be ten feet tall, that fairies don't visit when the sun goes down and grow potatoes and beans and tulips overnight. The junimos talk amongst themselves in their strange, wild language, and agree: this is the one. They're back. The valley recognizes its own, even when they've left for a generation. The farmers have come home.

Things change fast in the valley. The community center, empty and decrepit for so many years, is rejuvenated. (Lewis says it was abandoned only a few weeks after the farmer's grandfather left. Strange coincidence, he says, that it both came and went with the farmer's family.) The mines and the quarry, similarly abandoned, are explored for the first time in ages. The town becomes cleaner, brighter, more vibrant, happier.

And it is happier. Not just the environment, but the people. It's the talk of the town for weeks when Haley does her first closet purge. Leah's art show in the town square is a huge success. Shane's smiling for the first time since he moved to the valley. All of them, when asked, say it's all thanks to the farmer.

People love to ask why Lewis didn't fix the community center on his own. Why Willy never repaired the boat to ginger island. Why Abigail or Marlon never went down to fix the elevator in the mines, or why Clint didn't fix the minecarts.

But isn't it so much more interesting to ask how those things were there in the first place? How they got so broken down? If the stories the townspeople tell are true, the valley was once a beautiful place, flourishing and full of life; why did that change? When did it change?

Was it when the farmer's grandfather, the locus of the valley, its chosen representative, left town?

And if so, what happens when the farmer comes back?

[astersofthesky]

I will forever hold this part in the second op of Death Note close to my heart.

L and his lil capoeira.

[sainz100]

Fernando Alonso arriving on Media Day ahead of the 2024 Singapore GP | 📸 by Denzyl KY

[sureuncertainty]

it's also the way that the same people who have been spreading "don't vote! democrats are just as bad! voting does nothing!" posts online for months now are ONLY NOW posting "uwu take care of yourself, we're gonna get through this" like yeah no you don't get to fucking do that. don't fucking act like you care about me or my mental health today after you stood by and watched this happen. you can't even do the bare minimum.

[inafieldofdaisies]

WIP Wednesday | Tagged by @g0dspeeed <3 | Tagging @josephseedismyfather @adelaidedrubman @thesingularityseries @socially-awkward-skeleton @direwombat @euryalex @detectivelokis @nightbloodbix @aceghosts @madparadoxum @trench-rot @josephslittledeputy @theelderhazelnut @purplehairsecretlair @neonneurons @dumbassdep @shegetsburned @clicheantagonist @poisonedtruth @vampireninjabunnies-blog @cassietrn @wrathfulrook @voidika @harmonyowl @v0idbuggy @strangefable @schoute @jacobsneed @strafethesesinners and anyone with something to share ❤️

This midweek you're getting more of Jacob x Mercedes, the snippet is on the longer side (but like I don't want to leave you all on a cliffy like with the last "last line tag post") and things are definitely picking up, folks. Beware it gets NSFW towards the end. :D

"Bambi?", Mercedes shot a dark look at the now closed door of Jacob's office, "Bambi.", she shook her head and let out a bitter laugh. You truly have no idea, Jacob Seed. The last couple of minutes were a true testament of her ability to stay in character and not come out swinging the second he had started barking orders at her like she was one of his unfortunate subordinates or worse, an animal he was trying to tame. "Bambi.", she repeated again and bit her lip as she went around the desk and sat down in his chair. You're so lucky I didn't shove my fist so far up your clueless ass you would have seen stars. Intrusive thoughts about inflicting different level of violence upon his person had popped up in her mind anytime Jacob had opened his mouth to speak during their confrontation about her leaving the region. She had no idea why he seemed to enjoy pushing her around so much, but he was in for quite the rude awakening if he expected her to just run back to Joseph and abandon the task and chance at helping the opposing Militia. "The enemy of my enemy shall be my friend.", she whispered as she scanned over the plans laid out in front of her carefully, memorizing anything that could be of assistance at doing damage to the Project. One name repeated over and over in the notes, almost bordering obsession and she suspected the man was just the one she needed to find. "Eli. Eli. I feel like we can help each other." I will be the snake in your brother's garden. The wolf roaming among your sheep, Jacob. Not Bambi.

Mercedes hoped the Deputy that was brave enough to make a run for it would manage to escape despite Jacob's strong confiction he wouldn't. In ways she felt guilty for dragging the man and his colleagues into the mess. After going over anything available on top of the desk, she moved onto its drawers. Locked. Of course. She kept an eye on the door as she reached into her hair and pulled out one of the bobby pins from her braid, getting to work on lockpicking the top drawer. Her gaze narrowed in confusion the second she pulled it open and was greeted by emptiness aside from a small wooden box. She picked it up with curiousity and opened the lid, scanning over the letters engraved on the inside, "Only you? A music box out of everything, Jacob?" Mercedes returned the box back in its place and shut the drawer, double checking it's locked again before moving onto the rest. The discovery was more like what she had expected to come across: files of Hope County residents, most marked as "failure" with a red stamp. She quickly flipped through the folders without pulling any out, knowing there were way too many to go over when she had no idea when Jacob or any of his men would return to check on her. After locking all drawers again and making sure nothing was out of place, she leaned back in the chair with a sign, "Slow progress. Oh, how I hate you."

[one radio call with Joseph later; where he insists she must stay in the Whitetails and be his eyes.]

Hours passed without anyone appearing or even passing by the office door, the building remained quiet as the light outside began to dim. She was starting to wonder if Jacob hadn't decided to not return to the Vet Center at all, hoping she would take the hint and leave after his less than warm welcome. Mercedes lost count how many times she spun around in his chair as she contemplated her life choices and imagining where she would have been at that moment had she not gone after Joseph Seed at all. Probably at some unjustifiably expensive restaurant with a target, hanging onto my every word.Fuck, sure can use some food by now… Another spin paired with regrets and boredom had her staring at the peeling paint on the wall behind her and when she turned again instead of finding the office vacant, angry blue eyes met hers. Sneaking up on me, are we? "You're still here.", Jacob stated the obvious as he stopped in her earlier position at the desk, their roles reversed, no matter how temporary. A smile broke across her face, Mercy coming out to play, "No place I would rather be." Many places I'd rather be, in fact.Anywhere with a more enjoyable company preferably.A bath would be nice, too, doesn't even have to be fancy.

"You called my brother.", he muttered in annoyance as he wiped his brow, smudging blood across his skin and making Mercedes realize his hands were stained crimson. Are you badly injured, Deputy? Is it my fault? "You should have left hours ago. I have to warn you, I don't take lightly to anyone disregarding my authority. Let alone to you making yourself at home in my chair, spinning around in it like a child." So did many control obsessed men before you, honey. Then they realized I do as I please. Most found themselves beneath me or chasing after me, begging for mercy at the end. Ironic, I know. "I answer to Joseph, not you. The sooner you accept that, the less times your blood pressure would rise.", she said, not letting her smile waiver even for a breath as she got up and rounded the desk to stand in front of him. Mercedes licked her thumb and brought it to his forehead, cleaning off the blood when she added, "You have to watch your heart at your age." "What do you think you're doing exactly?", his hand shot out, grabbing her wrist before it could retreat, "And you did not just dare to call me old." She tried to pull her arm free, but Jacob's grip only tightened as a result, "A joke, Jacob, I assume you know what that is. As for what I was doing… you had something on your face, so you're welcome." A strange expression came over his features when he replied, "I didn't expect to have it in you to crack a joke, Mercedes." One of her shoulders quirked up, "Not like you have spent any time trying to talk to me since we've met. How would you know what I'm like?"

All she got from him was silence. The air grew heavy with tension as his eyes ran over her face, hand still gripping hers, his body rigid. Minutes that felt like forever rolled by, and she did her best to keep her breathing steady as goosebumps covered her exposed flesh. She wondered if she would end up slammed into a wall and what would follow. His look tells me that he'd either kiss me senseless or choke the life out of me. Neither outcome very high on my list, thank you. Her back didn't meet the wall behind her, instead he swiftly pulled at her hand and dragged her out of the room without a single word. Jacob took quick, long strides over the hallways, forcing her to jog in order to keep up with him, her flats slipping on the worn-out tiles. His men watched, heads bowed down, trying their hardest to appear disinterested in what their boss was doing. "Jacob?", she uttered out in confusion, refusing to let go of Mercy's sweet and naive persona. In reality she suspected that at some point in the quiet moments back in his office, he had realized she wouldn't be leaving on her own accord, and was set on personally throwing her out, having decided he's done dealing with her. In seconds, he was at the front entrance of the Center, pushing the doors open and heading with determination past all the rolls of cages towards a white pick-up truck marked with a familiar cross. Yes, sending me packing, alright. When they reached the vehicle, Jacob finally let go of her wrist as he went to grab her bag from the car she had driven there. Her eyes shifted between her forearm, where the outline of his fingers was now imprinted in crimson, and the sun setting against the darkening sky. The loud slamming of the car's trunk brought her attention back to him and she watched him toss her luggage in the back of the truck and round the front without a single look in her direction.

"Get in, Mercedes.", he ordered as he threw his door open and climbed in. Mercedes reluctantly walked over to the passenger's side and bent down to speak through the open window just as a wolf howl sounded somewhere in the distance, making her tense up, "I told you that I'm not leaving. Joseph-" His cold eyes finally veered at her, "I said, get in. Or do I have to come out and make you?" Are we sure John is the one with anger issues? All she could do was sigh in defeat as her fingers found the handle of the door and swung it open. She hauled her body inside as her mind struggled to accept the fact she had failed, that coercing him into letting her stay had proven to be an impossible task after all. The minute she was buckled in, he started the truck, keeping his gaze glued to the road as he drove away from St. Francis. "I don't need you driving me.", she said softly, already dreading the idea that she would be stuck in the same tiny space with him, having to tolerate his glowering all the way back to Joseph's Compound. Even she had her limits. His head swiveled sharply, blue eyes meeting hers, when he gritted out, "Do you want to sleep in one of the cages back at the center, sweetheart… or are you going to shut your mouth and stop complaining before I change my mind about letting you stay?" Mercedes blinked in shock, certain she had heard him wrong. "Stay?", she said slowly. His hands gripped the steering wheel, knuckles turning white, the blood that covered them was all dried up by then, "Yes. You called my brother. You have him to thank for that." She bit her lip, looking out of the window as the truck went over a small bridge, the river below it dark and unwelcoming, yet still promising her freedom.

"Where are you taking me, though?", she asked, wrapping her hands around herself, wondering if she had missed an opportunity to jump to safety especially after his cage comment. His surly demeanor foretold of nothing but trouble. She was certain Jacob wasn't going to grace her with an answer, then he suddenly broke the silence, saying simply, "A cabin. Should be empty." Without giving her a chance to reply, he reached out and turned on the radio, muttering, "No more chit-chat, keep quiet. We're not suddenly friends because Joseph managed to convince me to tolerate your presence here." Mercedes nodded absently and leaned back in her seat, watching the dark road ahead. After a while he spoke up again, "Look at that. You're actually listening for once." From the corner of her eye she could see his lips twist into a small smile and she wondered if he expected her to respond, or he was testing her, hoping she'd give him another excuse to lash out at her. Eventually, he parked the truck in front of a small unlit cabin that would have been completely hard to spot if it wasn't for the headlights that casted light upon it.

She opened the passenger side door, shivering against the change of temperature the moment she exited the vehicle. She quickly grabbed her bag just as Jacob called out, "Where do you think you're going?" "Thank you for the ride, Jacob. Have yourself a good night.", she retorted, not bothering to turn around and entertain another argument that would keep him from driving off. She followed the path to the front door of the house as she heard his door slam shut, then footsteps stalking her way. Fucking hell. You're really asking to be kicked in the balls now. "Mercedes.", he grunted out. "What?", a hand wrapped around her upper arm, pulling her to a stop. His tone told her that irritated Jacob was making a return, "I said the house should be empty, would be smart if you don't go storming it before I've had time to make sure it's actually safe to enter." "I don't need your help.", Mercedes shook off his hold and continued down the walkway. "Do you even know how to use a gun, sweetheart? Any basic combat? Hell, can you even throw a punch properly?", he chided, his usage of the term of endearment dripping with sarcasm. "No, and no. But we could always test the punching part out if you insist, then tell me how I've done afterwards. I know you love training people.", she was tired of his constant belittling and let the last part slip without worrying too much about how unlike Mercy it was. Yes to all three, actually. And don't expect me to worry about your pretty face. But she knew it was better if the Seeds believed she was helpless, naive, too oblivious to be up to anything, let alone be planning their demise right under their noses. It was a target's most common mistake: underestimating her, it's how she always remained hidden in plain sight, and by the time they would realize the critical lapse of judgment, she was always long gone.

"Babysitting.", Jacob muttered under his breath as he pulled out a gun from his leg holster and pushed the front door open, "Wait here. I mean it." The lights inside the house turned on one by one, illuminating the outside with a faint glow. "Cabin's clear.", he declared as he stepped out on the porch. "Goodnight then.", Mercedes went around him, dropping her bag on the floor as she slammed the door shut in his face and leaned against it. A knock sounded immediately from the other side, his voice muffled when he announced, "I'm not leaving." "What?", came out as a squeak, and she hated how for once the reaction was actually real: she fully had expected him to be gone before she had even crossed over the threshold. "The Militia has eyes everywhere, so by now, they would know of your arrival. If you don't want to wake up tied to a chair in some make-shift interrogation room, you'd let me in." "What are you, a vampire?", she said quietly, frowning at the idea he was still there and supposedly was planning to spend the night under the same roof as her. "What did you say? Kinda hard to hear you with, you know, a door between us, sweetheart.", he was back to sounding amused, and when he got nothing out of her, he knocked again but way louder, making her jump, "Joseph's orders, Mercedes. Open the damn door, if you don't want me gaining entry in a less pleasant way." She cracked open the door slowly, sending him a look of distrust, "He said nothing of that sort to me." "Well, he did, to me. Called me in the middle of hunting down my runner. Said I've been mistreating you. Scolded me like I'm a child, not his older brother.", he scoffed, his face bearing an arcane expression when he added, "Want to know what else he said?" She fought back a smile at the idea Jacob had been knocked down a peg, no matter by whom. "No." He pushed past her inside, "Might be for the best, actually." Talk about foreboding.

With a huff she headed down the hallway after him and found herself standing in a small living room. The freamed pictures of a young couple reminded her the cabin was someone's treasured home that the Project had forcibly taken away, and judging by the lack of dust, it hadn't happened very long ago either. Jacob didn't bat an eye at the sight, sitting down on the couch with an arm thrown over the back of it as he continued, "The fact of the matter is, Joseph decided it would be smart to have someone keeping an eye out for you during your stay. Said I should personally see you settled in." She knew that having someone around to keep tabs on her and make sure she wouldn't run into the Militia was certainly bound to make her task of finding a way to run into them more difficult. "I thought you didn't want to 'babysit'?", she narrowed her eyes, remaining standing in the doorway. "Trust me, I don't. Don't go believing this would turn into a regular thing, I'm staying here only for tonight. So don't get any ideas." I will be sobbing into my pillow every night, Jacob. What shall this damsel do without a petulant ginger to protect her… More silence filled the room until he said, "You know, for someone that always tries to make conversation with anyone, you sure are awfully quiet out of a sudden." "You made it very clear I'm unwelcome here and that you dislike me. From day one, if I may add. I've made my peace with it, so enjoy the silence. Isn't that what you wanted after all?", she replied and grabbed her bag from the hallway, dropping it in the bedroom. She could foresee him complaining about the possible sleep arrangements, but if he had a problem with the couch, he could always sleep outside as alternative.

The lack of blood and no noticeable signs of struggle around the house gave her hope that maybe the two people that used to live there had made it out unscathed, she wanted to wholeheartedly believe that was the case. Mercedes kept to herself and made it her mission to ignore her moody chaperone as she washed her hands in the kitchen. She scrubbed at the bloody fingerprints he had left on her skin, wanting to get rid of the reminder she had no idea what had happened with the Deputy. She knew she potentially had a way to get an answer, but she refused to risk arousing suspicion by asking his captor about it. "Know how to start a fire?", Jacob chirped from the living room, still lounging back on the couch. "No." Yes. "Want me to teach you?", his cordial tone wasn't something she was used to. "Why are you acting all nice to me out of a sudden?" "What would you rather I do then, Mercedes? Figured the night would pass by easier that way.", she could feel his stare on her as she kept her back to him, opening and closing cupboards until she found a glass to pour herself some water into. "You don't have to sleep here. If you're worried I will tell Joseph… don't and just be on your way already." "I'm staying. You still didn't answer my question. Do you want me to teach you?" She moved onto the fridge next, finding it almost empty as expected, "Nothing edible in the fridge, Jacob. If you don't want ketchup for dinner, that is." "Check the pantry, most folks around here are preppers one way or another.", he explained, coming from behind her and opening the door to the small pantry himself before she even had a chance to, "Here."

He pulled out a couple of cans, leaving them on the counter as she took a generous sip of water, wishing it was alcohol instead. Sure as hell would make my charming companion seem more tolerable. "And if they had nothing stashed away, what was the plan then?" He raised an eyebrow, "Catch us some dinner." "I'm a vegetarian." It was another lie, but she had no desire to watch him play caveman, not if she was to keep her appetite after the things she had witnessed at St. Francis. "Are you now?" "You have a problem with that, too?" Jacob shrugged, "It's nature. We all have a spot on the food chain." "Whatever you say." "You don't agree?" Mercedes waved a hand in his direction, "I just have no energy for all this." When he went to open one of the cans, she moved over to where he was standing and grabbed it before saying, "Are you not even going to wash up first?" He looked down as if realizing for the first time the actual state of his hands. "Sorry.", he muttered and moved to the sink. The quiet apology took her by surprise, but she didn't let that show when she asked, "You hadn't even realized your hands were bloody?" "When you do this every day, it becomes a habit, a part of you, you stop paying attention because it doesn't look unnatural.", he uttered out over the running water, "We all have a role to play." "What's that supposed to mean, Jacob?", she certainly didn't like his clipped tone.

After methodically drying off his hands in silence, Jacob turned with another dark stare, pointed her way, "I cull the herd. Get my hands dirty for the Project. You play dress-up as my sister's double to keep my brother company." "I'm doing no such thing." "No?", he smirked, "You have no idea about my brother's plan for you, do you?" She had her suspicions, but the fact he was close to voicing his and had such a reaction piqued her interest. "What are you talking about?", she blinked in confusion, letting worry seep into the question. He shook his head, deciding against saying anything else as he opened the can and dumped the contents into a pan she had pulled out, "Doesn't matter. We all have our roles, sweetheart, it just takes time to realize what they are. You, too, would, eventually." In a couple of minutes, Mercedes found herself sitting across from Jacob at the small kitchen table that accentuated his towering presence even more. She stared down at her bowl, feeling disappointment at the fact that in less than a few hours, she would have been in Hope County for 388 days, and she was nowhere close to seeing an end to her mission. Jacob was right about her having a role to play, but he was dead wrong about who she played. He finished his meal first, getting up quietly and heading off into the hallway after dropping his plate in the sink. A part of her hoped he would just up and leave, not matter if it disobeyed Joseph's orders.

Done with her own dinner, she took a seat in an armchair next to the couch, and to her dismay, he returned shortly, carrying a couple of pieces of firewood inside. He kneeled down in front of the fireplace, mumbling, "So, have you changed your mind about me teaching you how to start a fire, yet?" "No." "Why?" "Because." Because your friendliness is forced. Because you're only being nice after getting scolded by Joseph and being offered some cryptic revelation about me. Because I'd rather keep my distance for so many reasons. He shook his head at her nonanswer, patting the empty space on the carpet next to him, "Come on, Mercedes." "No, thank you." "You'd certainly regret declining that lesson in the winter months… if you even make it that long in the Whitetails, that is.", he said, not bothering to mask the jab. "You're the survival expert, right? So do it yourself." "You owe me for destroying my poster. Humor me, and I will overlook the transgression." She shook her head, "I did no such thing, I told you already. I'm staring to wonder if there ever was one in your office or you're making it up so you have something to hold over my head." His eyes narrowed, "You're lying. We both know there was one." "Am not." "Come over, already. We can argue the whole night or get the cabin warmed up."

Mercedes got up with a sigh, shuffling over to him before she knelt down, and grumbled, "I still don't understand why you insist on it. If you expect I'd be praising your efforts to play nice to Joseph… that won't be happening." He ignored her words, slipping into explaining the basics she knew by heart, "First, you check the damper if you don't want all the smoke coming into the house." She nodded along with enthusiasm, urging him to continue, "Two pieces of firewood.", he picked them up from the floor and placed them on the grate of the fireplace before crumpling some newspaper, "Tinder. Then kindling on top. Some more firewood. And then…" Jacob reached inside his shirt's pocket, taking out a matchbox and passing it over to her, "…you light it." His fingers brushed against hers, and she tried to ignore his intense stare as she removed a match and struck it, wasting no time in starting the fire. His 'lesson' being officially over meant he would finally leave her in peace. Or one can only hope. "There. Done.", she muttered, and turned to face him, "I'm off to bed. Goodnight." as the words left her, his hand grabbed her cheek, the pure shock stopping her from getting up. "What are you doing?", she asked in a shaky voice, telling herself it was acting, and his touch wasn't actually throwing her off-kilter. "Something I definitely shouldn't be doing.", he gritted out before clashing his mouth to hers.

Alarm bells sounded in her head. This is beyond disastrous. Push him away. You're signing your death warrant. His fingers slipped into her hair, tangling in the curls and holding her close as his tongue parted her lips, and he let out an animalistic groan the second it met with her own. The scent of the burning embers in the fire mixed with his own fragrance, completely overwhelming her senses and causing the desire that had taken over her system the second his mouth had covered hers to deepen. Mercedes finally gathered the willpower to push at his chest and break the kiss, whispering, "We can't-", she shook her head to stress her point, not sure who she was reminding of the whole thing being a bad idea. Her body certainly had missed the memo, if she was to judge by the arousal that was pooling between her legs. "There are rules, Jacob. Especially-" "I won't tell if you don't.", Jacob said as if it was that simple, surprisingly looking almost as shaken up as she was. "You're lying. Did he put you up to this? To what…test me? Or are you having a laugh at my expense, seeing if I'm easy to tempt, then unleash John on me as payback?" "No.", he uttered out sharply, "It's nothing like that. And trust me, Joseph has nothing to do with this. We both know he would never suggest-" "Swear it." She had gone so long pretending to be someone she's not, feeling under constant surveillance at the Compound, having to follow Joseph's rules and act like she was smitten by his holier-than-thou persona. She craved a small win, to take something for herself, to get even an hour back into her old life. None of that seems feasible… so an orgasm wouldn't be bad, either. What a better "fuck you" to the Father than… fucking his brother?

Amusement flashed across his features, but it didn't get rid of the lust swimming in his blue depths or the frown he wore at her accusations, "I swear it. Are you going to make me do a pinky promise, sweetheart?" "Very funny. What if I do?", she reached out her pinkie as a joke, expecting he wouldn't entertain the idea, instead he wrapped his around it without even batting an eye. "There. Do you believe me now?" Mercedes had met many liars, she herself had become one for living, so she knew how to read people and what to look for, her eyes were trained to notice even the smallest tell in her opponents. In that moment, she couldn't see any signs Jacob was lying, and deep down she just didn't care. She nodded, and it was all the motivation he needed to pull her in for a second kiss, arms grabbing her waist and hoisting her onto his lap. His mouth glided over her cheek and down her neck, beard scratching her skin as he pushed the dress strap out of the way to nip at her shoulder. "Jacob", she hummed his name, and he got up. Her legs instinctively wrapped around his midriff as he strode in the direction of the bedroom, kicking the door open. Before she could blink, he deposited her on the bed, and she leaned back on her elbows, watching him as he hungrily stared down at the spot where her dress had ridden up and exposed her thigh.

"If we're gonna do this…", he paused, head swiveling in search for something, "I probably need to turn off the lights." Mercedes sent him a determined look, "No. I want to be able to see you. See us." We're not fucking in the dark, for fuck's sake. "I'm telling you, you don't." "I absolutely do." "Mercedes.", he held out his hand, palm running over the scars on his forearm, "You see this… they don't stop at my hands." "Clothes off, Jacob. Now." Her tone shifted as the Mercy act slipped completely, and if he noticed, he chose to ignore it. His blue eyes narrowed in uncertainty, making her nod, then repeat, "Clothes off. Want me to do it for you?" "Yes." Mercedes rose up on her knees, fingers taking hold of his camo shirt and stripping it off his body. She grabbed the hem of his short sleeved shirt next and lifted it up over his head, unveiling series of scars and burns across his skin. "Told you.", Jacob replied with a frown. "Come here. All I see is a survivor. Do you think these are going to stop me from wanting you?", she placed a kiss above his heart before her fingers locked at his neck, pulling him down on top of her. For a second, she was staring past the defenses of the man that barked orders at everyone and tried his hardest to keep the world at arm's length, and it made her heart ache. "You gonna get me out of this dress?", she asked, cradling him between her thighs as he finally snapped out of his stupor.

His hands reached around, looking for a way to undo the dress as his lips found hers for another feverish kiss and he let out a growl in frustration, moving back to whisper, "I can't find the damn zipper." "It's there. It's small-" "Do you love this dress?", he asked impatiently. "I can unzip it myself, just-", she stopped, blinking in confusion at the strange question, "Wait, what-" "Do you?" "Not really. No." Hate it actually, and the fact it seems to be your brother's favorite. "Good. Turn around." "Jacob?" "Do you trust me, sweetheart?" Not as far as I can throw you. Probably even less. "I guess?" "Turn around." She complied and swirled, staying on her knees with her back to him, and the next thing she felt was something cold touching her skin before he ordered sternly, "Keep still." Her brain registered what it was: the blunt end of a knife, inches apart from her spine. What the fuck. Then the tightness of the bodice gave way, as he cut the dress open all the way and sheathed the knife. "All done.", he stated in a calm tone, like he hadn't just brandished a weapon in bed after being too annoyed to look for a zipper. "I can't believe you pulled out a knife." "Got the job done, didn't it?"

His fingers moved the straps off her shoulders, the garment pooling on the bed and leaving her down to her underwear. She spun around to find him staring at her intently, blue eyes running over her body as if searching for something. An unreadable expression came over his face before he guessed, "You haven't been in John's chair, yet." I will be gone the second Joseph decides the time for me to confess has come. Shockingly enough, I draw the line at body mutilation. I'd prefer to avoid having to explain why I have sins engraved into my skin to whoever would be my next target. "No." His gaze darkened, "Just what I suspected." "What do you mean?" Instead of offering her an explanation, he gave her another cryptic response, "Doesn't matter." "Jacob." He shook his head and crashed his lips into hers in an attempt to stop her quest for answers, fingers unclasping her bra as hers got to work on undoing his jeans and pushed them down his legs. Mercedes lied back on the bed, gaze following his movements with anticipation as he took off his boots and pants, then joined her before any doubt or her common sense could creep in. His mouth traced a path from her abdomen up towards her breasts, lips closing around her nipple before he bit down on it gently. Her back arched when he moved onto the other one, showing it the same amount of attention as she tried to hold in her moans.

"I want to hear you. Every sound.", Jacob lifted his eyes to hers while his hand strayed over to one of the bedside drawers. He opened it and rummaged inside in a haste, huffing when he came up empty. "What are you looking for?" You pull someone's used toy out, I swear I'm hitting you in the face with it. "Condoms.", he stated matter-of-factly, opening the drawer above the one he had checked, "There you are." He dropped the wrapper on the bed, eyes roaming over her body, staring at her like she was his dinner. Calloused fingers slipped beneath the waistband of her panties and into her heat, exploring the same way her tongue began mapping out her mouth. "So wet for me, sweetheart." He pumped in and out of her slowly, his thumb brushing over her clit briefly, denying her actual release. It didn't take long for Mercedes to become fed up with his game, with his lips twisted into an arrogant smirk at how she was writhing beneath him. You're enjoying this too much. And I enjoy making people pay even more, Jacob. Keep acting this way and you'd find out. "I need more. I need you inside me.", she couldn't recognize her own voice as his hand retreated out of her underwear, leaving her body longing for his touch, to be filled again. "I'm more than happy to oblige.", Jacob retorted and moved away to discard his boxers, then dragged her panties down her legs, tossing them over shoulder. Her body trembled in anticipation and her gaze remained glued to his hands as they rolled the condom over his length, her stare inevitably making him choke out, "You keep looking at me like that, I can't promise I will be holding myself back."

She couldn't help the laugh that escaped her at the irony she was the one that had to hold back. In words and actions. He frowned at the sound and crawled over her, a cold sensation spreading over her skin when the dog tags he wore around his neck made contact with it, "Don't laugh, I'm absolutely serious here." His hands parted her thighs while he went in for another kiss, guiding his tip to her entrance and barely making it in as he whispered, "I might regret offering this, but… last chance to back down, Mercedes." A bit late for that now, ain't it? Or does "just the tip" not count in your cult? Their mouths met again just as she grabbed his hip and pushed him all the way inside, letting out a content sigh at the feeling. The part of Mercedes that always managed to be the voice of reason reminded her in last ditch effort how stupid the decision was, how reckless, then it went completely silent the second he began to move. He kissed her like he couldn't get enough, hands braced on each side of her face, every thrust appearing more intense and desperate than the previous. "Faster. Don't hold back on me. Fuck me like you meant it.", she hummed against his lips and he complied, hand holding onto her waist as his strokes picked up and his thumb found her clit, driving her over the edge with just a few flicks. She half-expected him to follow her, but he shook his head, "We're nowhere near done here, sweetheart." His eyes met hers as his hand took hold of her leg and rested it on his shoulder, finding a new deeper angle, the lingering aftershocks of her climax only intensifying his movements.

"What did you call me today, hm? Old?", he asked in a low tone, emphasising the word with a hard thrust and smirking at the moan that it elicited from her. Touchy, aren't we? Still not over one innocent joke. Though, fuck, I'm starting to think I should nag you more often, if this is how it ends for me… "That an yes, Mercedes?", Jacob challenged, slowing his rhythm down and kissing her calf, "Then there were all the times you undermined my authority… Maybe I should teach you that actions have consequences." His expression told her he was reveling in the idea he was completely in charge of her own body, still believing her to be this meek creature he could play around with as long as he pleased. Time to give you a taste of your own medicine. A smirk broke free on her face as she rolled them over until she came on top and straddled him. Her hands found her destroyed dress, and quickly unlaced the ribbon that adorned the front of its bodice, the subtle sound seeming louder in the silence that surrounded them. Amusement flashed across his features, hinting he still believed she was playing around. His eyes darkened the moment she grasped both of his hands and swiftly tied the ribbon around his wrists, securing the ends into an intricate knot at the wooden bedpost. The tension in the air grew as they gazed at each other, anticipation for what was to come licking at her spine and by the way he twitched inside her, he seemed to be feeling the same.

The whole time he stared at her with a strange expression, voice full of wonder when he asked, "Who are you and what did you do with 'Mercy'?", he spat out the nickname with disdain. Mercedes ran her fingers over his chest, tracing the rougher parts of his skin before leaning down to whisper in his ear, "What did you call me today?", she paused, still mimicking Mercy's gentle tone despite copying his words, "Bambi?", then the real her peeked through when she added, "I'm more of a wolf, Jacob. About time we met." He tested the retraints, and a growl escaped him when they didn't budge. Not my first rodeo. You're not going anywhere. She cupped his cheek, lowering her mouth to his as she started to move at her own pace, the new position threatening to send over the edge before she wanted. In the back of her mind she delighted in the idea how scandalized Joseph would be if he saw them at that moment, if his "God" graced him with the unfortunate vision of her breaking such a precious rule to him. "I knew there was something more to you. That "Mercy" was only skin deep. I could feel it anytime I looked at you.", Jacob said in between kisses, his breathing getting labored now that she had taken charge of their movements. Her teeth bit down on his bottom lip, the sharp tang of his blood hitting her tongue, "Did you? And here I thought you didn't like me." "I didn't like you.", he choked out, "I still don't.", and it was the least convincing lie she had ever heard in her life. Giving me second hand embarrassment here, Jacob. "Should I stop then? Because you see, I'm getting mixed signals here.", her lips moved onto his neck and she sucked on the skin, marking him, "You're telling me one thing, your body another… who's lying?"

She couldn't help but wonder what his Chosen would think of her signature on his throat, especially after the way he had dragged her out of St. Francis. "No.", he said, clutching onto whatever semblance of control he had remaining. "No, what? Did I break you? Form a sentence for me." "Don't stop." A very un-Mercy-like smirk broke free, "Ah, that's what I thought." Her hips rotated again and again, bringing both of them closer to release until he muttered, "I won't last much longer, Mercedes." "I come first, only then you do, too, understood?", he raised an eyebrow at her stern tone but nodded, "Good." Mercedes straightened her back, her hand gliding to where they were joined, fingers rubbing her clit while the other caressed her breast. His eyes drank her in and she could tell he was enjoying the show, yet his face remained scrunched up with concentration as he held back his own release, set on proving a point. On proving himself to her. A second climax hit her, ripping out a moan out of her, and it was all the encouragement he needed to let go, too, as her walls clenched around him. "Fucking excellent.", he said, still out of breath, the genuine shock in his words and his sated expression causing her to beam with pride. It was the first real smile to grace her face since joining the Project, one that reached the dimples in her cheeks, making them pop. The fact that he mirrored her grin didn't help matters at all. If I didn't know better, I'd worry I'm in trouble.

[l-tora-l-archived]

Hello (again :6) !!!

[bookwyrminspiration]

ANON HERE TO YELL AT YOU FOR NOT GOING TO THE DOCTOR:

GO TO THE FREAKING DOCTOR YOU COULD HAVE A DISEASE AND NOT EVEN KNOW IT YOU SHOULD BE SEEING YOUR PRIMARY CARE PHYSICIAN AT LEAST ONCE A YEAR FOR YOUR PHYSICALS AND ALSO GETTING VACCINATED EVERY YEAR IS IMPORTANT

AN OUNCE OF PREVENTION IS BETTER THAN A POUND OF CURE

SORRY SORRY SORRY SORRY SORRY!! I'M PROMISE I'M AT LEAST VACCINATED I'VE BEEN DOING THAT PART!! AUTISM 💪💪

You're so right about all of this I really should. The issue is that I don't like my primary care doctor (last time I saw her I said hey I think I have an anxiety disorder and she went hmm. let's test you for a stomach bacteria instead. so I took the test--they fucked up the sample--and then went to a therapist and got diagnosed with an anxiety disorder). And finding a new one is an intimidating task without a deadline, so I keep putting it off.

But I shouldn't, you're right, this is why I said to yell at me. i will do better i can do hard things </3

[dewitty1]

Saturday Six (Stuff)

But on Sunday

The Farmer's Market was slow AF again yesterday. But it was also hot as hell too. Though I did get quite a few people talking to me, which was great. Idk, this year has been very strange. (゜-゜)

Speaking of work being strange, idk what to do about my accountant. She still hasn't got my sales tax put in to the state dept of revenue, nor are my federal taxes done. I'd fire her but she's a family friend. Ugh. (；¬д¬)

I do not like this record breaking heat were having. Neither does my air conditioner.(･｀ｪ´･)つ

My annoying neighbor who has, for the 7 years that I've lived here, put out his leftover food "for the birds", has now recently put out an aluminum pan for food. Welp, naturally this attracts rodents. And other stray animals. My cat Reggie does not mind the occasional rodent, and has recently caught a few rats and left them for us. Ugh. On Thursday there was a bit of commotion (people grabbing loudly) outside, and I was looking for Reggie anyway due to it being firework day, so I looked to see what was up. It was a mother effing snek!!!! Ugh. So yeah, he's got sneks coming around, because of all the rodents. In all the years, we've never seen one here until now. I'm very upset to say the least. And I'll be talking to my landlord tomorrow. ヽ(●-`Д´-)ノ

My parents had a birthday/anniversary party yesterday and I had probably THE WORST deviled egg of my life. ヽ(ﾟДﾟ)ﾉ

I keep torturing myself by looking at houses for sale. It's really frustrating.(´Д｀)