#y’all do not want to know how long ive been working on this for it’s embarrassing
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souplups · 4 months ago
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east is up
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e-vay · 6 months ago
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so… i turn thirty this year & after two failed relationships, im unsure how to have hope i’ll ever find my “person”. Ive been following you for a long time… how did you have hope that you’d eventually find someone and have a happy relationship?
If this is too intense or personal to ask, dont worry i just,,, i dont know. Its a struggle to feel like i’ll ever find The One and i know you went through something similar so… maybe you’d just have advice?
Thank you,,, i hope youre having an amazing night ❤️
I don’t mind you asking me this. If talking about the hard times I went through can help others get through it, I think it’s worth discussing. 
Like you said, I also struggled with love for a long time and after a few devastating relationships I gave up on dating altogether for a while. But, in hindsight, that ended up being a blessing because I was able to spend time bettering myself and—most importantly—learn to love myself. Yes, having a partner can make our lives richer, but I think it’s important to be able to enjoy your own company. Before, I thought the void inside of me needed to be filled by another person, so I would go out of my way to find somebody to do that without actually worrying whether or not they were the correct fit for me. Having time to focus on myself made me a better person (I think), and it ultimately ended up being for the best because I no longer felt like I was less than. Of course, I would still feel lonely from time-to-time and I’ve always been a romantic so I love the idea of love, but I got to the point where I felt fulfilled enough on my own so that when I met my now-husband, the feeling was significantly different. It wasn’t “I need to put this person in the hole that is my heart so that I can crawl my way up out of this pit,”... It was instead “Oh, this person significantly ADDS to the joy in my life” and that’s one of the reasons why he stood out to me as a partner. Though I would have liked to have met my husband sooner in life, honestly? Had we met sooner, before I matured and improved myself, we likely wouldn’t have worked out. I'm not saying you need to improve yourself. I'm just saying that that's what helped me and ended up giving me hope.
I also think society gives us too many unrealistic expectations and goals that we’re expected to meet by certain “deadlines”. Everybody moves at their own pace and has their own journey that’s unique to them. We can’t all be expected to follow the same linear path; humans are just too different. I was my husband’s very first girlfriend and he was 36 years old when we started dating. But when I’ve asked him if he’s upset/disappointed he never had a relationship before meeting me, he’s told me “No, I think we met when we were supposed to.���
Lastly, I want to address my personal beliefs on “The One.” Y’all know I’m a romantic and I do believe in soulmates, but I also believe we’re capable of having more than one soulmate. The world is too big for us to be limited to the chance of only ever finding one single person who is compatible for us. And if we miss out on meeting that one person, our chance of love is shot??? I just don’t believe that. When widows/widowers remarry, does that diminish the love they had for their late spouse? Of course not. It doesn’t mean their first love wasn’t just as important and meaningful as their new love. So, maybe you could find it helpful if you adopt this mindset as well. I think it makes the idea of romance seem less impossible.
I don’t know if this makes you feel any better but at the very least I hope you don’t feel worse for having read it! I don’t know you personally, but I wish you absolute happiness.
It's going to be okay 🙂
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svmjaeyvn · 10 months ago
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love maze, s.jy.
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chapter nine pairing: jake x afab!reader word count: tbd (series)
masterlist
genre: college!au, mutual friends, fake dating, smut.
synopsis: an unfortunate encounter, drunken mistakes, and a sort of (definitely) stalker leads jake sim ‘dating’ his best friend’s childhood crush.
or, your life gets intertwined with a rich boy’s in attempt to not get sued by his crazy personal fangirl and like with all good cliches, sex overcomplicates things.
contents: smut, sort of strangers to fuck buddies to lovers pipeline, childhood best friend!jay, mentions of best friend! yunjin, curly haired & mixed reader, uni!au, rich nepo baby!jake, enha frat boys, lots of kissing, fake dating turning into fwb real quick, totally way too into it for it to be fake early on, big booty reader that’s jake’s obsessed with, partying and alcohol use, slight violence, he fell first and harder trope, stem bf & writer gf, (kinda overly) possessive jake, some angst to spice things up, daddy issues, hyper independent reader who struggles with her feelings, fluff and happy ending!!
a/n: hello~ i’ve never been a tumblr girly but i have went through my w*ttpad era back in 2018 so bare with me y’all. this will be a series but not that long (i hope) so pls look forward to it. warning tags will be placed before each “chapter” to specify what to expect. pls pls reblog and interact, i’d love to have feedback and see what your thoughts are. okay! yay, for now enjoy and thank you sm :D
MDNI, 18+
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CHAPTER NINE: JEALOUSY
previous masterlist next
word count: 4.1k
warnings: minjun is being a stalker, that’s sort of it??
a/n: IM SORRY IVE BEEN GONE FOR SO LONG. i’m working + doing an internship at the same time so im exhausted everyday since being an adult SUCKS so i’ve neglected writing (though i have a new idea for a smau lol) and this not that great but i wanted to provide something for you guys </3 jake is down horrendous and not even hiding it now it’s crazy
"PLEASE STOP STARING," Ni-ki whined, throwing an ice cube in Jake's direction who was perched at the counter with a giddy smile. You were on the other side of the store, in the midst of barring out drinks before turning to help your coworker with a unsatisfied customer.
It was different to see you in your element, of course to you it being a mere barista job but Jake couldn't deny how much a leadership position suited you. You were good at quite literally everything, barely paying him mind when he waltzed in 20 minutes ago due to the afternoon rush but seeming calm and collected as you handled the line of drinks that seemed never ending. You looked as pretty as ever in his eyes, your haired pulled up by the clip in your hair and bare skin that seemed to be glowing.
You were called in last minute by a fellow shift as they weren't able to come in due to an emergency. Knowing Ms. Cho would've been the one to cover, something you couldn't bare to make her do as she was meant to take the week off due to spraining her wrist, and not wanting to leave Ni-ki hanging you canceled on the previous study-date you had scheduled with Jake much to his disappointment.
Lo and behold though, said boy decided that he had all the time in the world to wait for you. After you called him on your break, excited that a coworker would be coming in to do the closing tasks, telling him you'd be off at 6:30 instead of 10, Jake stopped by an hour before your shift would end deeming that allowing him to treat you to dinner would make up for the raincheck.
"Bro honestly, I know she's your girlfriend but can't you go sit down at least," Ni-ki's voice breaks his thoughts once more. Jake merely rolled his eyes, waving off the boy who looked exasperated by his presence.
"Yah, whatever. You're just bitter 'cause you’re bitchless," Jake began to tease, watching as the younger boy rolled his eyes and discretely flipped him off without the other customers taking note.
There was a familiar jingle from the door, Ni-ki's eyes looking past him to greet whoever walked in but his face turned into one of visible disgust. Immediately making his way in your direction without a word, Jake curiously turned around with his brows frowned to see what caused such a reaction.
A small scoff left Jake's lips, watching Minjun b-line to where you were behind the bar with Ni-ki glued to your side and staring him down like a guard dog. A small smirk picks at his lips, Jake waiting patiently, watching from afar to see what he planned on saying as you'd be able to handle it yourself.
"___," Minjun spoke, attempting to gain your attention but you merely lifted your gaze for a second as you focused on the drinks you had sequenced. "Can we talk?"
"I'm busy," You said dryly, sending him a pointed look as you were on shift quite literally in the middle of working. "If you need something you can ask my other staff to help you,"
"Are you seriously going to ignore me?"
"Are you seriously showing up to my job when I told you to leave me alone?" You shot back, brow raising in disbelief. "It's harassment, do you want me to call the cops?"
Minjun bit his lip, seemingly collecting his thoughts to carefully piece what he intended to say next. "You're ignoring my texts, how else am I supposed to talk to you?"
"I blocked you," You answer with a small shrug. "I don't want to talk to you. We have no reason to either way, it was your idea to move on with our lives in the first place so I don't see what you need from me now,"
"It was a mistake," Minjun attempts but a loud scoff comes from your end at his words. Feeling yourself grow more and more annoyed, you take a second to collect your thoughts, having to silently remind yourself that there were a handful of other customers that you still needed to be portrayed to in a professional light.
Your eyes flickered to the left, feeling the familiar gaze boring into your side. You met Jake's look, his brows slightly pinched as he held an unreadable expression glancing over Minjun. His arms were crossed against his chest, leaned against the front counter while his head tilted in the smallest of ways meeting your eyes. Silently indicating whether of not you wanted him to intervene, you shook your head, turning over to Ni-ki who was still on gaurd just a step behind you.
"Can you take over for me?" You ask the younger boy, his eyes softening as he glanced down to you with a small nod. Telling Sooyun the same, you leave the two on the floor to handle the customer flow and walk away from Minjun without a word. He attempted to follow along the counter that kept you separated, only to stop short noting how you met Jake at the break that separated the workers and customer side.
"You okay?" Jake asks softly, his hand finding its place in your own as he traced his thumb over your palm in attempt to offer some ease to your mind.
"I don't know why he keeps trying," You mumble out, swallowing the lump in your throat while Jake pursed his lips. You had to admit, no matter how unaffected you attempted to seem, having Minjun back and weaseling his way into your life was slowly opening up old wounds that never fully healed. It felt exhausting seeing his face, much less feeling trapped in your own workplace since that seemed to be his resort to finding you no matter how many hints you've given to leave you be.
"You want me to call the guys and we can jump him out back?" Jake offers, the teasing in his voice caused you to laugh though the glint in his eyes made it hard for you to tell if he was entirely joking. "I could take him on my own but I'm sure Jay wants a few hits at him anyway,"
"So does Ni-ki," You snicker, glancing over to the boy who had his eyes trained on Minjun with a menacing glare. "I don't have the money to bail all seven of you out though so let's not do that,"
A cocky smile fell upon Jake's lips knowing well enough his next words would cause you to grimace. "It's okay baby, I'm rich remember?"
You roll your eyes but couldn't refrain from the small laugh that fell from your lips. "You're annoying," You huff, though the giggle that filtered through your words had Jake smiling from ear to ear. Leaning closer, he's quick to place a kiss to your lips, your eyes widening as you pulled away with a tsk. "I'm on the clock, stop making me look like a bad worker,"
"No one's looking," Jake reassures, not even sparing a glance around the room but he's sure of himself. His hands fell to your hips, pulling you in closer and technically he was right, the large pastry case and stack of boxes that you had yet to be able to put away had blocked a significant amount of view of where you two stood, someone would have had to come around the corner to see you two if they really wanted to.
A clear of someone's throat caused the two of you to pull away from the giddy bubble you were in. Your annoyance flooded back in a second while Jake lazily looked over his shoulder, his eyes lighting up taking note of Minjun who stood with a dark expression.
"What's up man?" Jake smiled, turning as he said so but still keeping one arm draped around your waist though you shifted slightly in your spot. His grip tightened feeling how you attempted to move, squeezing your hip as a silent way to tell you to stay in place at his side. "You need something?"
"Can you give us a minute?" Minjun's words were short and clipped, the visible annoyance dripping from his persona.
"Don't think so," He hummed with the click of his tongue. "M'names Jake," Holding out his hand with a cheeky smile, Jake waited for Minjun to introduce himself. You had to refrain from the laugh that wanted to spill from your lips, the obviously annoying but polite tactic one you wouldn't have guessed he'd play but it seemed to work better than being possessive or immediately hostile.
"Minjun," Was all he replied with, not bothering to complete the handshake Jake intended. Turning his gaze to you, he near pleaded in a softer tone. "Can we just talk?"
Jake let out a loud sigh, dropping his hand with the shake of his head. "You know, man, I wouldn't have held nothing against you but you're really making my girl uncomfortable," His previous bubbly expression was gone, now replaced with a bored one that shamelessly glanced over Minjun. "You know me personally, I don't go for girls I broke up with, especially after she told me to leave her alone and she has a new man. That's just me though,"
"No offense man, but I know you two just got together. Your new relationship doesn't compare to us," Minjun shrugs while you let out a laugh of disbelief. You and Jake were more comfortable together, by miles, in a short amount of time even if your relationship was based on a facade. After the first two months with Minjun, it felt as though you were walking on eggshells everyday to keep him around, a feeling you remember all too well and ridicule yourself for staying in for so long.
"I mean, you're the ex for a reason right? Our relationship s’not supposed to be like yours," Jake shrugs, a humorless laugh left his lips.
"You guys don't even make sense together!" Minjun was now speaking to you, gesturing between you both with an exasperated expression. "His life is completely different from yours and you know it, why waste time now when it won't even work out,"
You frowned yours brows, not knowing how much he had looked into Jake but either way, being so ambient on your differences seemed to rub you the wrong way. What exactly was he entailing? The fact that Jake was a party guy or he was rich? You grew up attached to the hip with Jay, sure you weren't directly apart of that life but you did know how to act with a cocktail dress and dinning etiquette when you needed to. You truly lacked nothing if the relationship was real and so far, Jake didn't either.
"It's cute to know you've been thinking about me," Before you were able to voice your thoughts, Jake beat you to it. His tone was teasing, though there was a slight edge to it indicating that the cat and mouse play going back and forth was something he began to grow tired of. His had squeezed your hip, somehow subconsciously knowing that your agitation grew as well, it a silent reminder that he was there for you.
Minjun scoffed, seemingly ready to retort but Jake shook his head. "You know, I don't really like being a dick and all," He starts, a small huff of air leaving his lips as if it pained him to continue. Jake's eyes flickered to you, he winked before the bored look was sent back toward Minjun. "But I do take advantage of the benefits that come from my family. Let's just make it easier on all of us since getting the lawyers involved is always so messy, yeah?"
Your eyes widened slightly, certainly not having any thought of any legal precedent but the threat should've been more than enough to get his point across. You felt a shiver run up your spine, thinking back to weeks ago when you got yourself into the situation you were now. She totally would've sued me.
There was a clear of the throat that broke the tension between you three. Ni-ki making his presence known as he sends Minjun a rather large, but most obviously fake, smile.
"I'm afraid I'll have to ask you to leave since I've had a few customer complaints from the situation that's occurring," He says in his peppy customer service voice, the faux sympathy in his tone adding salt to the wound. Looking around, you take note of the lie considering the lobby had cleared out significantly and not a single person in sight was paying any mind to what was occurring in the corner but you were certainly thankful for the deescalation.
Minjun doesn't say a word. His eyes lock with yours, the silent communication causing you to feel uneasy. For a split second, you almost felt bad for him seeing the look of pleading sincerity, for a second he seemed like the boy you once knew and you couldn't deny the slight tug in your heart that longed for the past. But as Jakes’ hand made its presences know on your back, you shook out of the temporary daze, you subtly moved behind him, using Jake as a shield of sorts and looking away.
You weren't naive enough to fall for that. And your thoughts proved right as Minjun's expression changed in an instant, the look of anger and annoyance familiar but he merely turned and made his way out of the shop without hesitation.
The bitter feeling caused your stomach to turn, picking at the skin of your fingers as you pulled out your phone to check the time.
"You okay noona?" Ni-ki carefully asked, His brows were pinched, a slight frown at his lips taking note of your visibly discomfort.
You nod, placing a smile on your features but it didn't quite reach your eyes. You looked behind him, seeing Sooyun working by herself. "I'm alright, I need to finish my pull before Hejin comes in so support where you can for now," You delegate, already heading toward the back room while footsteps followed soon after.
Jake sighed watching you walk away. He didn't know the full story, certainly didn't want to know the details of how in love you were, but he did know that Minjun was important enough to still bother you after some time apart. A small part of him was selfish, never wanting you to think of anyone like that but him, even though your relationship wasn't even real in the first place, but he knew that was his own jealousy.
The larger part of him felt upset for you though, the crestfallen expression you held more than enough for him to want to hold you and wash all your worries away. In a perfect world, Jake would make sure you'd never feel sad again. He vows to never be the one responsible for your tears, and if he were he'd kick himself and beg for the room in your heart to forgive him.
You stopped by the back freezer, facing the stainless steel doors and you could see Jake's reflection behind you. "I'm alright," You repeat, not having the confidence to turn around knowing your eyes were glossing over and the lump in your throat grew.
Jake hummed, watching you from afar. He watched as you began to count the frozen pastries, having to go over twice losing your train of thought and seemingly looking around aimlessly. You let out a sigh, leaning your head against the frozen rack as you shut your eyes, the cold air that wrapped around your body caused goosebumps to form along your arms, though it did well in stopping the tears that were built up to the brim.
"You know, you're technically not supposed to be back here," You mumble, a hint of amusement in your words though you were rather dejected.
Jake chuckled, shaking his head while you couldn't see it. The two of you stood in silence, not knowing what to say that would make it better. Heavy footsteps sounded as someone entered the back of the house, you peaking from behind the freezer door while Jake straightened up.
Hejin pointed a finger at you as she pulled her apron over her head. Your brows frowned, clicking on the tablet that was stuck to the door to see it only be 5:50. Her keys jangled in her pocket, the lollipop in her mouth muffling her words. "Go home,"
"What?" You let out a small laugh, amused by the loud groan she let out upon her apron getting stuck while pulling it down. "It's not 6:30,"
"I'm here now so go," Hejin huffs, pulling at her ponytail as she nods towards Jake, a silent acknowledgment to his presence but not bothering to ask why he was beside you. "I saw creeps-a-lot in the parking lot. The kid and Sooyun were blowing up my phone to get me here so I chased him away. Go home and relax, I'll make a incident report to let everyone and Mama Cho know to not talk about you and refuse him service from now on,"
Your lips pull into a frown, the tears once again welding up in your eyes. You covered your face out of embarrassment, Hejin clicking her tongue as she waved you off.
"Ay, don't cry," She tuts. "He's not worth it, new boyfriend hug her!" Hejin directs, gesturing between you and Jake causing you to let out a laugh. Jake tilted his head, his arms open as you reluctantly stepped into his embrace. You refused to look at him directly, hiding behind your hands though you could see the fondness in his expression as he stared down at you. "Good, now get out of here. Pretty girls should never cry over ugly men,"
With that, Hejin was out onto the floor. You stifled your laughter, heart pulling at the thought of your work family. She, in particular, was known to be rough around the edges, not one to show praise or direct affection but small acts like these were truly the most meaningful. You made a mental note to treat them in the future, thankful for the saving grace.
Jake pulled away from the hug slight, a small smile perking at his lips as he tilted his head. He gently pulled away your hands from your face, wiping away the few stray tears with the same fond look.
"You know, I don't know how to feel about you crying over another man," He teased causing you to roll your eyes. "Guess I have a lot of work to do to make you forgive him,"
"Forgive?" You echo, raising a brow not following his words.
Jake nods. "You know, for being an idiot but at least it allowed for me and you which is like, a million times better," He says in the most obvious voice causing you to snicker. "Forgive but not forget, or whatever it is that people say,"
"Have you been looking at pinterest quotes?" You laugh while Jake begins to nod wholeheartedly.
"You put me on, it's honestly so chill scrolling. I have like, five different boards I've made so far,"
"Rookie numbers," You tease causing him to mock offense.
"They all have certain aesthetics and are listed in order," He offers causing you to hum.
You nod in approval. "Better,"
Noting that your mood had seem to raise, Jake leans in, placing a small peck to the tip of your nose causing you to let out a small squeal. Your face scrunches up, pulling away from him while he lets out a laugh.
"C'mon, you owe me your time and I think I have the perfect idea to get your pretty little mind off everything,"
"YOU’RE JOKING?"
"What?"
You sent Jake a pointed look, smiling down at the excited animal that jumped into your arms, licking the skin of your cheek while your heart nearly bursted at the sight of her tail wagging so happily. "We've been faking it for over a month and you decided to just tell me you had a dog?"
"Her name's Layla," He laughs, crouching down to the level which you were sat on the floor. As soon as you walked into the door of the unfamiliar apartment, you were greeted by soft paws jumping at your leg along with excited barks for attention. "This is my brother's place, she's a family dog but he has her most of the time since my parents are always out of town. He's on a trip with his friends so he asked me to watch her for the week," Jake cooed as he pet Laylas fur, eyes full of affection and love as she leaned into his touch.
“I’ll watch her for the week,” You smile, gaining her attention once more as you scratched at the spot just behind Laylas’ ears. Her eyes shut as you did so, a small giggle leaving your lips as the dog visibly relaxed to your petting. “I’ll keep her company while you party or whatever you do in that frat house,”
Jake rolled his eyes, his view set on you but you were far too focused on Layla to care. “I haven’t gone to a party in weeks, and if I do you’re with me,” He says pointedly as you merely hum.
“Exactly, you can go do what you want. I’ll stay here with the cutest little puppy I’ve ever seen,” The latter half of your sentence was spoken in a high voice, cooing at Layla who seemed to be happily responsive to it.
Though he liked seeing how well you got along with his childhood pet, Jake tsked. Maybe it was a bad idea bringing you to see her, all of your attention would go to the little border collie instead of him which, admittedly, he couldn’t have.
“What I want,” Jake starts, leaning over to flood your view. “Is for you to not love my dog more than me,” He finished, dangerous close to your lips as you blinked, a small snort leaving your lips.
“Well for one, I barely tolerate you so Layla wins by a long shot,” You tease causing his lips to pout. Lightly pushing Jake away, he ends up sitting directly in front of you, Layla happily pouncing into his lap but still begging for you to provide her with scratches as she rolled over onto her back to expose her stomach. “And two, you can’t be jealous over your own dog. She’s just too cute,”
Jake sighed half heartedly. “You kicking me to the curb now for my dog?”
“Precisely,” You nod, a wide grin playing at your lips that you were unable to resist. It was still between the two of you for a moment, Jake taking the silence to gently place Layla down onto the ground beside you. You rose a brow, noting how he inched closer causing you to move back. “Hey~”
His arms were suddenly thrown around your body, one around your waist while the other was behind your head, blocking the impact of him suddenly tackling you to the hardwood floor. Your laughter filled the air, arms stuck under the weight of his chest and your faces inches apart.
“Too bad, you’re not allowed to get rid of me,” Jake huffs though there was an amused smile playing at his lips. “Say you like me more,”
You gaped in disbelief. “Are you serious?” The response to your question ended up with Jake’s fingers dancing along the skin of your waist, your shirt riding up and him knowing how ticklish you were as you began to squirm beneath him. “H-hey! Okay, s-stop—”
“Say it,” Jake taunts, his laughter mixing with yours.
“O-okay—”
Layla’s loud barks suddenly broke the air before the view of her jumping onto Jake’s head was seen. Your laughs were now from seeing how he yelped at the sudden help you received, rolling off of your body and with Layla still attacking his face with an abundance of kisses, you sat up. Now straddling Jake’s waist, you returned the favor of poking your fingers into his side, moving until you found a spot by his ribs that caused him to squirm around.
“Hey! You can’t team up against me,” Jake called out, unable to move either of you due to the way you sat and how Layla was now perched on his chest to get a better angle of sloppy kisses that he attempted to block. “She’s trying to lick my nose! Baby please—”
“What? I’m giving you attention like you wanted,”
my tags!! @slutforsjy @jaklvbub @whowantshota @addictedtohobi @coolwitu @simjyunnie @kgneptun @graythecoffeebean @143ikeu @zyvlxqht @tesywesy @nxzz-skz @aishisgrey @enczen @vanvity @dreamiestay @caitysdelusions @ikkeumyluv @v3lv3tsin
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grapenamjams · 3 months ago
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20 minutes
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Characters: Artem wing x fem. Reader
Genre: Smut
Contains: needy Artem wing because y’all haven’t fucked in a week, fingering, p.n v, mutual orgasm, princess. Gorgeous. Darling. Pet names used, marking.
A/n: needy desperate Artem is my favorite animal
🩵Start here 🩵
When Artem received the notification that his early morning appointment was canceled. He knew he had to take the opportunity that had presented itself. as the rare pleasure of having an extra 20 minutes before needing to get to work.
And he would be damned if he didn’t make every second Count.
So he set out to do just that. Your body trembling with arousal in minutes, breathe feeling like it’s been stolen, letting out gasps and moans.
His chest pressed against your back as you both laid on your sides under the sheets that were getting increasingly warm.
He captures your moan in his mouth Those dark eyebrows furrowing as if not being able to get enough air through your moans. His kisses where desperate. Because that’s what he was. It’s been a week since he last fucked you and the consequences of that, were apparent to him each passing day.
Feeling himself tighten in his suit pants at just the sight of you-hell just at the thought of you got him scooting his chair closer to his desk at work. He felt pathetic, not used to the feeling of lack of control. But if you were the reason for it? He would gladly relinquish any sense of it. having you consume him entirely. 
“I Need to be inside of you” his voice coming out strained. “Please let me fuck you, darling” Artem dosnt care if he didn’t sound composed as he normally did. He wasn’t going to let any second go to waste.
With your agreement in a form of a moan and you throwing off the covers from on top of you both. Artem pulls his hand that was between your thighs away. Fingers coated with your arousal just by rubbing your clit.
He pushes down your pj bottoms along with your underwear. lifting your hips to aid him. He tosses them over the side of the bed.
he kisses any skin exposed to him as he removes his own embarrassingly soaked briefs. His uneven breathing hits your neck. He presses his body closer behind you. “You’re so beautiful. So perfect, my love. Ive missed how you felt” he tries to regain some sense of said composure through his words.
His hand goes down your side and takes ahold of your thigh. Lifting it up slightly so he can settle himself closer. He holds back a moan at just feeling your folds graze his swollen head.
he knows he isn’t going to last long. Not like he usually does, making sure to draw out his thrusts, changing the pace to keep himself inside you as long as possible.
Right now though, it was different. His body trembling with desire. a growing flare that licked at his restraint. “Ready?” He asks even if mind was hazing. his number one priority in everything was your wellbeing and happiness.
Seeing your nod Artem shifts so the head of his cock is at your entrance. Your delicious warmth calling him to a long overdue welcome home. Artem sucks in a breath, lips hovering over your shoulder.
“You finished laundry, correct?” He sees the confused look in your eyes at his strange question.
“Yes I did. Why-!” You feel artem slips inside of you in a single thrust to the base when he heard the words he wanted. The sudden action making you both moan. Only, Artem’s is muffled with a bite to your shoulder. Soothing the mark with his tongue he begins to thrust into you.
“Good. You can cover these up then” mouth latching on to another section of skin. As much as he loves marking you. He’s always careful to place them in areas that can’t be seen, mindful of your professionalism.
But right now he didn’t have much choice. He was needier than ever before, feeling so incredibly sensitive and this position wasn’t helping. Letting him feel you at a whole new angle. “To long princess” he groans. He pulls out to the head and slams back in making you Yelp. To damn long. Feeling your heat stretch at the size of him. Your warmth engulfing him so tightly he wonders how he survived days without it.
“You feel incredible” he pants as his thrusts quicken. “No matter how much time passes, you always take me in so well” he praises landing kisses up your neck to your ear “isn’t that right, darling? Always ready for me.”
You turn your head to the side “I’ve missed feeling you inside me. P-please Artem harder” you beg breathlessly. He looks at your pretty face etched in pure bliss next to him. Something primal snapping in place. He kisses you as he obliges you. Needing it too if not more.
As he suspected Artem felt the all to familiar tension in his body coiling up rapidly. He curses not wanting this moment to ever end. Wanting to shut the world and thoughts of work away and just have you in bed the entire day making up for lost time.
“Touch yourself for me,hm?” hand tightening against your leg. “Together. Alright?” He manages to grunt out. You do as you’re told needing that release.
It didn’t take long for both of you to reach your highs together. Both of you so pent up for the other it was inevitable. Artem lips don’t leave yours, moaning your name and giving you praises as his hips don’t slow down feeling your walls clench around him as if they don’t want to let him go, demanding he stay and give everything he had left. He sucks in a curse at the thought filling your cunt, over and over again with his seed. Burying it deeper and deeper into you.
Groaning reluctantly, he slows down his hips ridding both of your highs. After a moment of catching your breath. Artem lets go of your leg. his kisses become gentler, reassuring. His words asking if you were alright.
A hand cupping your check and another pushing your hair away from your glistening face. He sucks in a breath, when he feels himself slip out of you as you turn your body onto your back.
Clear blue eyes, the hue that is found in the cracks of a glacier. gaze down at you with a sincere content look of fondness. a contrast against the bursting pink splotches across his face and ears. The smile you give him only deepening the color. He feels your hand push back his damp hair. He turns his head and presses a kiss to your wrist. Keeping his sights on you.
“How does your evening look like?”
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grxmreaperx · 1 year ago
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I rewatched Saw IV and I can't stop thinking about Peter Strahm as a soft Dom! 😩💦
Peter is absolutely a soft dom! I started out with some head cannons for this idea, but am absolutely willing to make a full on fic for this idea if y’all like this!!
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Pairing: Peter Strahm x (gn!) reader
Word Count: ~500
Warnings: 18+!! Lots of smut, mostly fluffy smut
Summary: Headcannons about Peter being a soft dom! Aftercare included!!
Peter Strahm as a soft dom would include…
• Your first couple times together, he would hold himself back (especially if he was your first)
• He would be very careful to make sure you are enjoying yourself and that he’s not being too rough
• Always very romantic, intimacy with his partner is very important to him
• He wouldn’t get rougher or more dominant unless you suggested it, or would maybe bring it up later into your relationship, after you’ve been intimate for a while
• One day, you suggest to him that he take a bit more control; it was something you had thought about for a while
• You loved how gentle and romantic he was, but you also wanted the chance to spice it up a bit
• Something changed in him as soon as you suggested it, and this man became absolutely insatiable
• Loves calling you pretty names: sweet baby, darling, baby, pretty thing, just to name a few
• Now, I’m convinced that Strahm would be the biggest softie for his partner, so I don’t think he would be able to degrade you unless you really wanted him to
• And even then, he would be so sweet afterwards, comforting you and telling you how much he loves you
• Loves picking you up and pressing you against the wall when you least expect it
• Just loves picking you up in general, just to remind you he can and who’s in charge
• “Good job baby, you’re doing so good for me”
• Will have you literally anywhere around your home
• In bed, against the wall, on the counter/table, in the shower
• “You gonna be good for me, darling? You know how much I love seeing you on your knees.”
• Loves overstimulating you and seeing how much you can handle
• “Cmon, love, one more for me hmm? I love hearing the noises you make, can’t get enough of it”
• I just imagine how he acts with Perez and how he talks to her/acts with her (picture the scene where she is hit with shrapnel from Billy). If he’s caring with his partner at work, he is going to be an absolute angel with his lover
o Side note: Perez is absolutely into women, and no one is changing my mind, but that’s a subject for another day
• If he’s had a long day at work and needs to let out some pent-up stress, he would probably be a bit rougher, like bending you over and pinning your arms behind your back
• “You look so good full of my cock, love.”
• Always has to hold you afterwards, lots of kisses and sweet talking, telling you how well you did
• Cleans you up, makes sure you have water, jumps in the shower with you when you’ve had a particularly hot and steamy session and you’re both sweaty
I know a lot of you have been looking forward to soft dom Strahm, so I am here to provide! This is kinda short compared to my other works but was trying to get into the swing of writing Peter and getting used to him as a character. Let me know how I did and if y’all want a longer piece of him being a soft dom with his partner!! (There is also a Peter Strahm NSFW alphabet in your futures, your girl knows what the people want👀)
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wooziorgans · 2 months ago
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mental health talk warning
um. hi again. ive been gone for the better part of nearly two months. at least I haven’t posted a fic since the beginning of October.
I wanted to give a little update on how im doing. and when I’ll be back (roughly) for good? maybe?
im definitely a lot more stable now. uh. it’s been an interesting few weeks. I think i was super deep in burn out n it made it a lot harder to focus on writing when i was almost forcing myself to post or be active. while id rather keep the details of how im doing or what was going on im definitely feeling more stable.
ive been spending a lot more time w friends and ive just been taking some time to do nothing outside of work so its been nice. laundry has been piling up tho so ill have to get to that soon lol.
as for my unofficial official return. soon. hopefully. i need to crack out smn for uji day n i have a rough plan for that but nothing solid.
ive been writing just to write and i think it’s been soooo good for me. to go back to that instead of having to worry about posting things. ive made such good progress on the band fic. and im thinking about posting the full warnings list (bcs this thing is so fucking long n im not even half way done part one) soon so people know what to expect. im hoping to post that in the new year.
titmh part three has been on the back burner. it’s taking a much more positive turn in the story line, especially readers internal shit is getting figured out. but i had to put it on hold bcs it was, funnily enough, almost too positive for me to write. the band fic has been a good way to vent out things and im very very excited to post it.
anyways. see y’all soon ig :)
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merlinfic · 4 months ago
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group ask for lost fics #45
Hi y’all! Below are a few lost fics that us mods just can’t seem to find. That being said, we’re hoping that you lovely followers are able to help! If anyone knows any of the fics below please reply below if you know of a fic!
Note: previous group asks and all lost fics!
Anon 1 asked:
I’ve looked for this particular fic for a long time now, but it was a modern day Christmas fic in which Merlin and Arthur are together and Uther disapproves <<>> I can’t quite remember specifics other then Arthur being jelly of Merlin dating someone else? Or something to that effect anyway long story short they wind up together in the end and Uther gets past his bias X’D I’m sad to see you guys go, but I’m so grateful for all the fic recs that have been left <33333
Anon 2 asked:
hi! thank you so much for all your hard work over the years and helping to keep this fandom alive, ive got a lost fic. i dont remember much but there was a noble of some kind who was mistreating servants and he tried to mistreat gwen and merlin stepped in for her and then arthur came to save the day. thank you !! <3
miraniel asked:
Combed all the tags I could think of & still can't find this fic, worried it's deleted: Merlin, Gwen & Gwaine r captured by bandits/minions looking for Emrys. Merlin casts a protection spell on Gwen before they're caught. Evil sorcerer tries to take Emrys's power by absorbing it into a (staff? crystal?) but absorbs Merlin's soul too. Rest of fic is about getting M's soul back in his body. At one point, he & Arthur share a body. I think Kilgarrah fixes them in the end. Ty SO much! Love this blog!
Anon 3 asked:
hello! do you perhaps know what fic those quotes are from? do you know how much i love you? do you know that i would do anything for you, anything at all? crown and kingdom and anything ever promised to me, i’d give it up, i’d give it all up—tell me, do you know? / and arthur loves him, he loves him so much that he fears his chest will splinter open and spill all of it into the space between them.
Anon 4 asked:
there was this fic i read some while back where merlin was a royal, and arthur and merlin were like bffs. i think arthur was the head knight?? there was a particular scene were merlin got a dragon tattoo on his back. i wonder if you might know which fic this is? thank u so much
the-tortoise-lady asked:
Hi :D I adore you people!! I'm looking for a fic set in Camelot, where Merlin is hurt (I think it was something with his leg? Not sure tho) and then Arthur spends a lot of time with Merlin, caring for him a bit? And there's one moment I remember when he's reading to Merlin and they're all cuddled up on some sort of sofa and there's a lot of emotions and feels? And fire in the fireplace? It's definitely Merlin/Arthur I think, I guess there also were some love confessions? I just sadly can't seem to find it.. I know that I read it on ao3 I hope you can find it (no pressure tho please!!) Lots of love and appreciation and a big thank u from me :)
Anon 5 asked:
Hi, I hope you have a nice day :) I've scoured the internet and also your page for this specific fanfic that I read a while back. Essentially Arthur finds out about Merlin's magic and holds him at swordpoint. They stand right next to a cliff and Merlin startles which makes him fall off. Merlin then discovers his own immortality, when he wakes up at the bottom of the cliff. But him being kept alive does not mean he is healed of his injuries. He puts himself back together for months down there if I remember correctly. The druids show up to help at a certain point I think. Please help me, I loved that fic so much :(
thelady-mary asked:
Hello, I just wanted to say that I'll miss this blog DEARLY and everything you guys did here, it means a lot to me, truly. Ok, so I've ADHD and I can't describe things for shit so I'll put the fanfic I'm looking for as a list. 1- it was some sort of 5+1 type, with multiple chapters, I remember that includes some jealousy and he knows about the magic. It was like Arthur was learning little things about Merlin that he started to love. 2- the things that he learn (and what I remember) was: Merlin's body hair grows really fast and he said that Gaius believe it was an outlet for his magic, they're traveling and M forgot his blade (the thingy that shaves beard) and he has this beautiful beard and long wavy hair by the end of the week, when they come back A is occupied with stuff and didn't saw M all day, but at the end he's back with short hair again saying that Gwen and George helped him with his chores so he could get a hair cut and shave; also A talks about how he recently learn that dyes are expensive and wants to know how M have such a colourful wardrobe and he says he only have two tunics because his mom helped a merchant out once and he gave her two pieces of fabric with she made the tunics and his neckerchiefs; Merlin knows how to write beautifully, calligraphy and all, M gets sick in this part and they communicate via little notes send it via George who told A that he was hesitaning into giving him M's note on the beginning because he thought it was improper, A keeps one that says "I believe in you" because he needs it emotionally; Merlin can compose music and he did compose and wrote an entire play (or just one song, I don't remember much), he dedicated one song to Arthur. 3- Arthur makes an announcement talking about love and union, looking directly at Merlin, hoping that he would understand that it was more or less about his feelings for him. 4- the song dedicated to Arthur it was about a Knight falling in love with his servant (and I believe running away with him, but don't quote me on that) 5- Arthur believes that the song is about Lance and Merlin's relationship, since is about a knight and not a King, and decided to go after him thinking his heart belongs to another. 6- Merlin confess that he wrote the song dedicated to him and ask what he thought about it, but Arthur is still under the wrong assumption and says that he liked the "song about the boat" better. 7- Merlin is devastated and I remember Arthur seeing him with Lancelot, with him giving him comfort 8- I don't remember how, but they confess to one another and have a little fight over the song part. And this is all I remember, I'm sorry if is really big or even impossible, but I'm desperate.
Anon 6 asked:
Hello! First of all, thank you for the years you've spent helping so many of us with finding fics, it really is very appreciated. Now, I've been wondering whether to ask or not for help with finding this fic for a while, but knowing you're going to soon close it up made me get over my shyness and just ask. The fic has Gwaine, Merlin and Arthur out doing... Something, and Merlin is forced to use his magic. Gwaine takes the fall, and Arthur banishes him to the nearby kingdom. I specifically remember Gwaine hugging Merlin and making him notice thar Arthur only drew out his sword after thinking it wasn't Merlin the sorcerer. The next part (I can't remember if it was a new chapter or a new part, sorry) has Arthur needing a sorcerer's help to decurse a land, I think, so the the knights of the round table all go to retrieve Gwaine. He and Merlin try to keep the lie up a bit, but then the truth comes out. That's all I remember, I hope it's enough. Thank you a
As always, this post will be updated if/when any fics are found!
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guillermothegreat408 · 2 years ago
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Not wwdits related, and mentions of the good omens “leak” so view at ur own discretion
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Ive seen some people saying they’re actually upset that az and crowley kiss and I’m just positing my opinion on the matter.
Ive been binging the first season all day because it’s been so long since I’ve seen it and I wanted a refresher before the new season, and I don’t know I feel that them part taking in physical intimacy makes sense for both of their characters, especially az.
Since they’ve both “gone native”, so to say, and they both clearly enjoy earthly, mortal pleasures more than any celestial beings are supposed to in this universe (Crowley with his car, clothes, music, house plants, and drinks, and az with his books, food, clothes, and general fondness for humans) why would they suddenly draw the line at romantic physicality? It was even implied in one of the latter episodes that az has in fact, had sex before, as he spent a great deal of time in an old timey “discreet gentleman’s club”. (I know he was there learning a dance but I mean…..let’s be real…..when in rome, right?)
For any other angel or demon in this world, I would say it would be superfluous of them to have any sort of physical intimacy or romantic entanglement, but the whole point of these two characters specifically is that they are very bad at their jobs because they are both too inherently human, too driven to want and to love and to think freely. Im not saying they’re gonna like, go to pound town on eachother (on camera at least), but I do think it would be in line with the characters for them to want such a very intrinsically human thing as a kiss from someone they love.
Idk that’s just my two cents, let me know what y’all think! (Also since I don’t know how replies work on mobile with multiple blogs, you’ll see me replying to anyone from my main blog jockerbrained)
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multiplicity-positivity · 4 months ago
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Ok so
I'm sure by the time you get to this everything we're going through will be over (if not I think I would genuinely be dead) (no like literally) (I mean it's rare but--) (I'm gonna stop) but I would be curious to see what you think about this situation.
So we got "sick". It's an ear infection, actually, but it's close enough. This ear infection has been worse than any we've had in the past (were oddly prone to these things and have had at least 3 (including the current one) in the past 3 years or so) and it has taken pretty much everything energy-wise from us. We've skipped two days of school from this too. We were also in the ER yesterday for it. That makes it sound really bad, but it was just for IV antibiotics so they would take effect quicker. Doctor recommended it.
Anyways. Because of this, we have literally no clue who's fronting and haven't since this started. I don't know who I am typing this. It's just been a blurry mess.
That's what im curious about. What do we do when all of our energy is being spent on just making it through the day (oh btw we've gotten treatment and it's looking good), but... I still want to know who's fronting.
There's been no access to headspace at all, not that we normally have much, and we were just getting to the point that we could hear each other even when we're not fronting sometimes. I'm worried this will backtrack our progress. It's been 2 years that we've been working on this, and it took so long to get to this point. I don't want it to all go down the drain because of one particularly severe ear infection.
Anyways. Respond, or don't. I won't mind either way, really.
-???? (Via @cloverstarsys )
Hiya! Yowch, we’re really sorry y’all have been going through a rough time! We hope that your ear infection will recover smoothly and y’all will be able to get some rest soon! >_<
When it comes to figuring out who’s fronting… the safety and well-being of your system should come first always! Y’all might just have to take some uncomfortable time without knowing whose fronting until you reach a point where you’re stable, safe, and pain-free once again!
We know that’s not really a good answer, especially if not knowing who is fronting is seriously bothering you. But please remember that the safety of your system and your own survival is more important than anything else, including knowing who’s fronting!
We do really love this article by Kella Hanna-Wayne on the ways their system figures out who’s in front:
Some of their suggestions could easily be done even when overwhelmed, like looking over a list of headmate names, thinking about what you want to do, or listening to different kinds of music! :3
We want to reassure you that blurriness likely will not last forever! So even if these tips don’t help and you still feel blurry afterwards, we hope you can find the strength to wait it out in the hopes that, as you recover, you may gain some more clarity about who you are.
Gosh, we really hope y’all start to feel better soon! We really don’t think that all your hard work and efforts will go to waste. Progress is not linear and just because y’all feel like you’ve been set back doesn’t mean that any of your accomplishments are undone!! Please try to get some rest and remember!! Your health should come first always!! >w<
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darkfictionjude · 2 months ago
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Ived talked and asked A LOTTT on this blog
Anyway my crownies name is Emory, no nickname because she would think it's cringe
All she has is basically 2 personalities, one is the stone cold straight faced from the childhood who doesn't feel anything and the second is the angry girl who is a bit sadistic and impulsive who wants to hurt a lot of people (she might get another personality with Imre but who knows)
Im romancing Imre because im a sucker for manipulative red flags, i love their dynamic at this point (she slapped him and kissed him)
At first i was considering on romantic Lorcan because i lovee enemies to lovers but I like mine a bit more dominant, and when i realized all routes are basically enemies to lovers ive decided to switch to Imre
but of course that means im still playing the field with Lorcan and Nia because why not i love drama
Now with Nia, i absolutely love her but im not into girls (??) to the point where id want my mc to end up with one, sexually attracted? yes, but not emotionally
I love percy and sally, sally is overbearing but i love him but can he leave us a little room to breathe? gah damn, and percy is just too funny i couldn't hate him even if he chopped my legs off
my red flag is that I can't hate any character who is funny, this weakness is also in real life in real
anyway i dont really care about the rest of the characters.... the mother could fall down the stairs infront of my crowny and all she would do is shrug and walk away
and about the father, if she could she would walk through him because he's none existent to her....
so this was my long ted talk, hope you had fun Jude
I love you pls dont die (in an inspirational way not a weird one)
Ohhh I have to disagree nonnie. To me enemies to lovers is a mutual thing. It only works that way if both hate the other, if one pair doesn’t hate the other it’s one sided so it’s just enemy to lovers or rivals to lovers. Imre and Nia don’t hate Crowny that’s why they don’t fall into that trope. Crowny of course can have the choice to hate Lorcan or not from the beginning but canonically when you start the game they have an enemy relationship as Crowny has either been cruel or just given Lorcan what he’s given them so they are enemies
“I can’t hate him even if he chopped my legs off” another Percy devotee I see we are people with taste 😌
I love how you clarified my death cause I got a message in my box with a poisoned cookie *eyes narrow* some of y’all are planning so little murder
Alsoooo I really like the Emory it actually sounds like Imre (if you pronounce his name Em-ree)
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13tinysocks · 3 months ago
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Just finished re reading ycyd once again. a wonderful read,
the last time I read it, was in Turkey and I got ghosted by a really hot punk guy and I was so violently depressed. BUT The idea of getting fucked by Toby unimaginably soothed my aching soul, I felt like a newborn fawn standing for the first time, perceiving an unseen world, and it’s vast beauty. More importantly, I may currently be frantically drawing all of the sex scenes with Toby for my own personal perverted enjoyment , so hypothetically do you know where that reference photo of the loft is?? for science of course.
Also partially blaming you guys for the period where I only went out with guys that looked like Brian and Tim, because y’all injected an uncontrollable lust in me, Alas, not sustainable in the long run; trying to get your man to wear a masky cosplay 24/7.
Anyways, you guys reignited Toby being my muse, and please if you do respond drop all of your art of Toby this is a stick up and I need it
So now I’m gonna go read spill your guts again bye!!!!!
This was my spill your guts Toby I drew last year and some ycyd tob which i’ve drawn eating him out alot artistic reverence, yada yada yada
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1. Show me his cock.
2. I've always been very boring and Ill traveled so I've only ever really dated Abby (my beloved I love being boring) How are you pulling this many people? I want to study you under a microscope actually. (I am NAUGHT slut shaming I love sluts)
3. I once knew a Brian doppelganger. He was my sister's shitty boyfriend. Good riddance but I mean the resemblance was uncanny.
4. I love your art and I follow you from my main. If Toby had the means he would be like a freak Strade/Mason hybrid. Already kinda is but you get me.
5. I haven't drawn Toby much in the last year or so but I've got a few things for ya.
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This mornings warm up and a shitty drawing of the loft. I always imagined it as kinda shallow with indented shelves.
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Stuff from my Insta of Toby. Left is from last year. Right is part of a wider print well be selling with interruptions of the manor fellas but make it ho1c teehee.
That's all Ive got for Toby. I'm sorry beloved mutual. I wish I had the energy to draw him as much and as cute as you do.
However. I've been working on pinup prints you see. Tim and Brian double slutted up you see.
Brian's done but Tim's still in the works and very bald and has triangle nipples.
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Toby is genuinely the reason we started SYG in the first place. It was his birthday and I wanted to widdle COVID times away by writing. We all know where that rabbit hole went.
I also have a piece of YCYD's novelization Toby art. Since I can't use the real thing I wanted to keep him close but not too to Toby in looks and personality. So here's that
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Erm ☝️🤓 thank you for reading. I really do love your stuff teehee kicking my feet.
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dreamii-yume · 2 years ago
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Hello! ♥︎
I am BACK with another underrated Japanese Yandere Audio Drama ASMR recommendation for y’all~! Because this is all I’ve been doing in my spare time, I have no goddamn excuses on why I haven’t been posting much 🤡 This, my friends, is the reason why I’m so damn inactive these days lol BUT HEY—Please don’t go 🥺 This one is a real fucking gem, Darlings—I don’t understand why it has so little views on Youtube because it has everything I wanted in my hornii. There’s the plot, the smut (It’s not very explicit as to a full-on fucking, because Youtube—Just a few lewd lip sounds, that’s all 🫣 But that’s all I needed to get the neurons working) and there’s kinda some angst in there(?)
Anyway, it’s an hour-long! 🧎‍♀️ I was so happy after I was done listening to it and kinda speechless ngl ☠️ I dug hard for this gem and I’m not about to gatekeep anyone from finding it and sharing the experience (dont ask how i stumbled upon this one though, you dont wanna know how much ive been scrolling on youtube to find this, my friends 🧎‍♀️)
youtube
It’s a Yandere Audio Drama that is simply titled “Nya-chan” 🫣 Ominously adorable title, but it’ll make sense as you listened to it. As always, it doesn’t have an english translation as of now which is extremely unfortunate because I think a lot of people would’ve appreciated this more if it does—BUT THAT’S WHY IM HERE EVERYONE 👀👋
So, if you don’t mind—Allow me to spoil you all with what happened with a “brief” summary of it all ♥︎ (EDIT : THIS IS A LIE IVE BEEN WRITING THIS FOR TWO HOURS) BUT I STILL WANT YOU TO LISTEN TO THIS ART PERSONALLY, the voice actor really did a great job with it 😭 check them out, seriously.
Warning : Implied Non-Con | Implied Dub-Con | Implied Stockholm Syndrome | NTR
Kinda got way too into “translating”/“explaining” this one scene by scene so—It’s very chaotic, so that might get annoying so just a heads up lol
♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎
The story starts off with You (The listener UwU) meeting your fiance’s little brother for the first time and because you want to be a good future Sister-in-Law, you wanted to spend time and bond with him by partaking in his hobbies. He’s an engineer of some kind, and it seems like he’s a talented cook as well because when he found out that you’re hungry, he made you some pasta 🧎‍♀️You praised him, but he says you’re overreacting cause it’s just pasta lol he’s clearly embarrassed—He sounded like wanted to say something else (Probably wanting to cook more for you if you want ✨👀👉👈) but his brother comes in and interrupted him.
Under his breath, he says “Why does he have to be here of all times” which makes me think that this may not be the first time he knew of us…Or he just—y’know got attached that quick. (It really wasn’t specified 😭 or I might’ve just missed it somewhere 🤡) But ANYWAY, THE NEXT DAY—
You both met again, and he’s surprised that see you and where you work at because it’s close to his (?) You pointed out his office clothes, and he thought you were making fun of him, but was pleasantly surprised to hear you say that he looks good in it and he thanks you for it. Flustered, he changes the subject and ask where your fiance may be because he couldn’t get hold of him lately—It seems like he’s working overtime and he feels kinda bad that you’re going to eat dinner alone, so he sighs and invites you over to his place so he can make you something. He’s a real tsundere at this point of the audio drama, which was very cute lol But he seems like he has a soft-spot for you, because once he saw how you really look like you want to try his cooking again, he caved in quick lmao
At his home, he sarcastically praises your appetite and was impressed by the fact that you’re able to act so close woth him, despite only meeting for the few times lmao we have no shame. Your only reason was because you see him as you’re own younger brother too, and he only hums and scolds you more lol Even though he sounds like he’s all annoyed with you, he still encourages you to still eat more and stop complaining ☠️ He says he can guarantee the taste but plating is not his strongest forte lol
Then, he suddenly asks if you’re gonna contact your fiance anytime soon about this and it seems like you didn’t plan to do that—In which he scolds you again and say that you should, because he (your fiance) might think it’s weird. Again, you told him it’s fine because you’re only hanging out with him like how a big sister would with her younger brother…Here, we can hear that hint of disappointment in his voice as he whispers to himself, “…So you don’t see me as a man then.”
Of course, you didn’t quite hear what he says and asks if he can repeat that, but he says it’s nothing and went back to pressure you to continue eating because the food is getting cold.
After a while, you finally finished eating and he praises you for it…Also teasing you for looking so happy about it too along the way. He scolds you about learning how to cook for yourself sometimes, because you sound like you know what good food tastes like lol You told him that—Yeah, maybe from now on, in which he commented that you sound like someone prolonging their diet for tomorrow ☠️ and that’s the kind of person who usually don’t succeed on what they planned ☠️ someone calm this man down jesus christ, i did not to be called out like that ☠️ You asked him if he could teach you instead, but he refuses because he said he was self-taught and can’t teach for shit, so he tells you to learn it by yourself. Damn bro.
Then, this is where he shifts the conversation towards you instead—He asks where you and his brother met, in which you replied with the Cat Café he often visits and Yandere-kun doesn’t seem surprised lol His brother often invites him there, but he always refuses because he’s not good with crowds—Though he likes cats…AGAIN WITH THE WHISPERING he says “…If only I went with him at that time.” “Maybe I could’ve met you earlier than him.” BOI 👏
You asked him what he’s whispering about, and he denies saying anything like he always does and asked you to continue your love story with his brother. It seems like you met his brother when he was at his clumsiest, accidentally scaring a cat, and the cat made a mess, so you got angry with him. Because of that, you both met a second time for him to help you clean up, and things escalated from there—
Idk, Yandere-kun keeps saying wow that sounds like something out a manga—All sounds like he’s impressed and shit but I have a feeling that he’s so annoyed somehow lmao He sounds dead inside ☠️ He says something about it all probably being a “miracle of love” lmao He sounds so insulting about it 🧎‍♀️
He asks why you fell in love with his brother, like what’s so good about him? And you answered “The way he seems so silly, but is actually very reliable” or something—and somehow, he knew and understood that it had to be that reason too because he, too, knew what his brother’s strongest point is…Though, he didn’t know that girls likes those kinds of men too. He proceeds to slander you for having simple tastes ☠️ lmao
The conversation then starts to shift towards himself as he slowly begins to reveal how he feels inferior compared to him—Since his brother seems to have everything, while he’s just there on the shadows. You took notice of this and assured him that, at the very least, he’s still very kind. He’s flustered, embarrassed, scratches his head as he appreciates you for saying that.
…But HOO BOI THIS IS WHERE IT GETS INTERESTING—You then asked something about him, wondering if he, too, has someone he likes romantically. He was surprised to hear that actually, hesitates, but turns serious and says, “Yes…Yes, I do have one.”
“She’s very bright, kind, and a handful. She’s older than me, but so unreliable that I just can’t leave her alone.” He sounds incredibly embarrassed. “She eats the food I make with a big smile on her face…and it makes me really happy.”
But he suddenly sounds solemn. “…But that person is getting married next month, and I’m still in shock.” He laughs a little, but he sounds so sad 🥺 “I kept thinking, why is it not me? Maybe if I have met her earlier, maybe that could’ve been me by her side.”
“Why do I have to meet her when it’s all too late…? It’s really unfair.” 🥲
“But you know what’s worse?” He starts getting a little weird like he just fucking gave up on trying to hide his feelings lmao “The one that, that person is getting married to…is actually my own older brother. So, I don’t know what to do about that.”
OF COURSE, THAT SOUNDS SUS AF so, as an act of defending yourself against the awkwardness, you stood up from your seat and about to fuck off to oblivion, when he stops you like “Wait, hold up—Please, don’t leave 🥺” He admits that he was frustrated on the fact that people view you and your fiance as this sort of “fated couple”, and it makes him sick. It feels like his brother got something he wanted and once again, he lost. Yandere-kun admits that he doesn’t have that many friends, nor does he have a girlfriend himself, so it’s always his brother who gets all the attention. The expectation that was supposed to be his was given to his brother himself, so he hated how it’s happening again with you this time…and it feels like the universe is forcing him to give up on everything for his brother.
“…But why do you have to be so nice to me?“ It turns out he was actually trying to give up on pursuing you too, but it hurts because he doesn’t want to—Since you’re so nice to him, you spend time with him, and had praised him more than anyone has…But you only see him as a younger brother and not as a man. He felt like you asking if he has anyone he likes was the final straw, and he couldn’t help but laugh. He comments how insensitive you are 😭 Like having no self-awareness and all that shit man
But he knew that you were only trying to bond with him only because you want to have a good, healthy relationship with your soon-to-be Brother-in-Law…But that’s when he finally snaps and how that’s never gonna happen, “From the very first time we met, I’ve only seen you as a woman more than anyone else.” So, he will never see you as just Sister-in-Law, he loves you too much.
He was surprised himself to know how weak he actually is, because just thinking of you was this fucking painful and he’s pissed that he can’t even help himself…and embraces you, finally being able to touch you freely, and commenting on how nice you smell like.
“Hey…How do you think I can be freed from this pain?“ “How do you think am I supposed to give up on you?” Because he doesn’t want to give up on you, he wants you to fall in love with him as well and asks if that’s really such a bad thing.
Perhaps a little freaked out, you began to call your fiance’s name instinctively but he scolds you, “Please…don’t call anyone’s name but mine right now.” AND FUCKING SOFT KISSES YOU. He demands you to say his name, and when you hesitantly did—He’s on cloud-nine, asks you to repeat it again and again, and again as he KISSES YOU EVERYTIME.
“I can’t…I can’t take it anymore, come here.”
You obviously resists as he takes you somewhere, and he 😭 kinda politely asks you to stop struggling because he doesn’t want to be rough with you lmao He wants you to listen to him as he continues to force you to make-out with him (with slightly aggressive moaning, mind you ☠️) and keeps on obsessively (desperately) telling you that he loves you as if that shit was going to change anything lol but well—who knows 👀 foreshadowing, am i right Also he tells you that you shouldn’t hold your voice because he wants to hearyou loud and clear, so just keep on paying attention to him and he’ll make you feel good ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
THEN THE AUDIO FADES BECAUSE YOUTUBE 🫠 But it’s assumed that whether it’s forcefully (which is VERY MUCH likely lol) or not, he manages to get his way with you through the night 🧎‍♀️Mfcker even has the audacity to ask for permission, but I don’t think he would’ve cared if you had said no lmao ☠️
The next day (?) comes, or maybe it’s still night idk it’s not really specified BUT AFTER SEGGSY SESSION, he asks if it hurt (BITCH)—He proceeded to apologize, like seriously apologized🧎‍♀️Even he didn’t know why he resorted to forcefully taking you, despite knowing that it’s wrong. But whenever he thinks about how you’re going to be his brother’s wife soon, all he sees is red…He keeps apologizing and says he really doesn’t mean it and understands if you won’t be able to forgive him anytime soon.
…Perhaps you were guilty about the fact that you unknowingly lead his feelings on by being close to him too, you apogized in which he denies immediately—Saying you didn’t do anything wrong, and that everything is on him.
To compensate, you suggested to just simply forget everything that happened until now—But Yandere-kun doesn’t quite agree with that solution. “…Am I supposed to just forget about something that made me so happy?” He says he can’t do that, but realizes that he was being selfish again and apologized as he begrudingly agreed to do just that. “I guess it’s better than you reporting me to the police.” He said, it’s the least that he can do.
“I’ll…I’ll forget about what happened…Definitely. But just for this moment, will you stay with me?” You somehow agreed, and he hugs you tight—Whispering yet another apology.
Some time later after what happened, I guess…Oh, and it’s getting closer to your wedding day PFFT He calls you through the phone, and he was surprised that you answered—He’s sorry for calling you, but he says his brother is at his place and has something he needed your help with, so he asks if you want to eat lunch with them…But he understands if you don’t want to, since it’ll be awkward with him there after what happened. But you agreed anyway, “Are you sure?” He asks, but says he’ll be waiting for you then eventually.
He welcomes you to his home, and it’s not really explained here—But you were surprised to see him, maybe because he looks horribly depressed 😭 He tells you to just go inside and sit your ass down lol You ask where your brother is and he says he went to the convenience store to buy something and he’ll be back soon (doubt) and AGAIN he apologizes for what happened between the two of you, which makes me think that he’s really reflecting on his actions and I’m just being a little bitch about it ☠️ He said he’s gotten better at controlling his feelings now, and swears to you that it won’t happen again (DOUBT)
You assured him, and he finally sounds happy omg He admits that he was sad the past few days because he thought you won’t be able to talk to him again—But seeing you right now, talking to him, and reassuring him made him so glad that he’s wrong 🥹 He’s very grateful and you jokingly tell him he sounds strange compared to before.
He kinda agrees with that and admits that he loved you too much before, and every time he remembers the things he says and did, it made him incredibly embarrassed lol Though he feels better now, since he doesn’t usually have this kind of gloomy personality, so he’s fine now 🙃
…He then suggests to play a game, while waiting for his brother to come back 🙃 A very simple, easy game 🙃 Just close your eyes, hold out both your arms, listen to what he’s saying, and focus which hand is holding yours—Left or right 🙃 Simple, right? 🙃
If you win, he’ll congratulate you on your wedding—Buy you whatever present you want…”What if you win?” You asked🧎‍♀️And this mfcker just went “What? Don’t tell me you’re worried that I’m gonna make you do something weird or something?” He laughs and strictly told you to just close your eyes alreadg lol He keeps praising you like you’re a kid and assures you that he’s moved on 🙃 So you don’t have to worry anymore 🙃 That from now on, he’s going to be your little brother like you always wanted 🙃 and it’s not like he’ll be able to do anything weird when his brother can come home anytime lol
The amount of (doubt) I had was immaculate when listening to this for the first time, darlings—Can you tell ☠️ He says if he won…He’ll let you cook dinner next time, cause he’s sick of always being in-charge of the cooking and wants to try your cooking this time.
So, then the game begins…Or not lol He’s still preparing, and the first thing he does? Obviously—Gets as close as he possibly can towards your right ear because it’s “necessary” lmao This man ain’t slick ☠️ Obviously, you’re a bit uncomfortable with that, but he says that if you give up now before anything has even started, you won’t get a wedding present from him lol “Don’t worry, it only tickles at the start. You’ll get used to it soon.” AND THEN THE GAME ACTUALLY BEGINS LMAO ARE YOU READY???
Close your eyes, repeats the rules about your hands and he—He begins to fucking BLOW on your ears ☠️ This was fucking tingly af ngl, not something to listen to whilst the dead of the night because it’s actually relaxing af jesus christ…ANYWAY, HE’S SEDUCING YOU BTW.
He bites, sucks, and licks on your ear, encouraging your body temperature to go up and proceeds to gaslight you into thinking that there’s ABSOLUTELY NOTHING wrong nor suggestive with what he’s doing, nu-uh 🫠🫠 It’s all part of the challenge of the game, he says and your ears are just sensitive lmao He commentates on what he’s doing too omg “My tongue is going deep inside your ear.” EAR PORN HITS DIFFERENT NOW, DOESNT IT ☠️
This sussy moment continues on for the next few minutes—But like, as it’s happening, you can hear some really…ominous sounds of something shuffling in the background like someone rummaging for something and like ??? Obviously you’re curious and FINALLY—He asks which hand is holding yours right now…You answered correctly, and he proudly tells you to open your eyes for a job well-done and BOOM.
You’ve been handcuffed 🤡
He cut off every sensory you could possibly have at that moment just to distract you from noticing what he was doing. “I tricked you? No, that was all part of the game.” You probably started raising your voice, but he shushes you—Telling you to shut up, because he’s going to make you feel good again ☠️ GETS ME EVERY TIME GODDAMN IT LMAO Ladies, remember that all men do is lie 😔 (sigh)
He sounds WAY different than who he was before, which makes me think that he was only acting weak, because he sounds assertive now as he drills lewd words right into your head. “Who’s in front of you right now? Say my name.” But you call for help, called your fiance’s name instead. He shushes you gently and corrects your mistake…but asks you again, “Who’s touching you right now? It’s me, isn’t it?”
Maybe you didn’t answer, to scared to say anything—So, he reassures you by instilling you with his own twisted logic : “Don’t worry too much about my brother.” He says, like the devil on your shoulder. “You haven’t been officially married yet, so it’s fine. You’re not doing anything wrong.”
“You, me, or my brother. We’re not doing anything wrong.” He says, he sounds like he has a smile on his face as he continues to brainwash you into doing the wrong thing. “…So, say my name. Look at me and only me, because you’re the only one I can see.���
“Fall in love with me.”
“It’s fine. You’re not doing anything wrong.”
“Nothing at all.”
He kisses you a few more times, to give further validity with what he’s saying and at this point, I think you’re slowly giving up—Because there’s really nothing else you can do but accept it. He convinces you that his kisses feels good, and that you loved being kissed with tongue—and with your feeble, slowly-getting-fucked-out mind, you begin to agree with everything he says. So, he promises you that he can make you feel even better.
“I’ll always be with you.” He says, which had you confused—So, he states the obvious, “Because I’m going to be with you forever.”
“Aren’t you happy that there’s someone in this world who loves you as much as I do?”
He suggest for the two of you to “Do it” again—Your losing your focus, so he had successfully convinced you into saying that you want to do it too…He tells you that he’s happy that you’re thinking that way ♥︎
🫣🫣🫣
WE’RE ALMOST TO THE END GUYS PLEASE BEAR WITH ME, THIS IS AN HOUR-LONG AUDIO DRAMA BUT ITS SO GOOD.
After sexy time, the term “Nya-chan” has finally been addressed for the first time and it seems like while y’all we’re fucking, he was calling you that all this time. He wonders why he was calling you that too—But he guessed that it’s because he had always seen you as a little selfish-bratty cat whenever you’re eating the food he makes, so he just ended up calling you “Nya” as a nickname…Nya as in the Meow in Cat
He likes it, it feels special because he’s the only one who can call you that—He repeats it over and over again and asks if he can call you that from now on. You agreed, so I guess that’s your name from now on, Darling ♥︎👋 Nya-chan 😺 He feels so happy calling you that, it’s so special to him that he begins to cry—He loves Nya too much🧎‍♀️
(My typing hand is dying)
The next day—Someone is calling him and tells you to stay put. It’s his workplace, it seems like they need him for something despite the fact that it’s his day-off lmao somethings never change huh 😭 He’ll still go, but then he notices that you’re now standing in front of the entrance door, and he asks you if you’re going somwhere…But you don’t you say anything, so he figured that you might’ve been too afraid to stay here all by yourself…He steps closer to you, apologized for not noticing your worries earlier—But like, “I was so happy when you told me that you’ll stay with me forever, so I just trusted that you won’t leave.”
“Sorry, have you come to hate me now?” He starts to get a little unhinged, like you triggered something in him, which quite frankly means—That he’s becoming scary again ☠️ “…Hey, did I do something wrong?”
“You’re not…trying to run away, are you?” He steps REALLY close, those footsteps sounds heavy and the little laugh on his voice—Like you just said something really ridiculous and shows that he’s a little pissed 🧎‍♀️Dear God… “Let’s have a little talk, shall we?“
And he slams you to the fucking wall.
“…That’s not it, right? You’re not trying to run away, right? You understand that, right?” He bombards you with questions that I don’t even think you’re answering because he’s already convincing himself that you won’t run away, because you love him, yknow? Why would you even think of something like that lol—Like the little delusional man he is ☠️ He says he’s sorry for being suspicious, he’s just worried for his little Nya and that’s on him. You never know what’s out there.
“I’m so, so goddamn worried that I might lose it once I imagine what will happen to you if you leave this room, Nya.” He’s sounding more and more deranged. “Hey, you’ll understand that, won’t you? WONT YOU?”
He kisses you once again to prove how much he loves and cares about you, but goddamn he’s as yandere as one can get because even I’m scared of how twisted this man’s bipolar-ass kind of love ☠️ He continues to tell you all the things he’s scared of happening when you get out, like when another weird man comes in to sweep you off by the feet and he doesn’t want that 😭 It’s like this man just completely erased the fact that you and his brother are engaged and would actually be getting married in a few days lol Guess that ain’t happening anytime soon now ☠️
“Nya wouldn’t want that to happen to you too, right?“ He baby-talks you, plays with your mind and using this kind of manipulative-guilt-tripping shit going on. He even goes threatning her by saying how even he won’t be able to touch her again if you’ve become tainted by others—And in turn, no one will. So, he scares you into understanding his forceful and terrifying logic…And he’s satisfied with what you become.
He apologizes for being rough before, for almost giving you a goddamn concussion lmao Because damn he’s well-aware that he’s losing his mind, and the fact that you’re the only saving grace he has, he will do his damn best to keep you by his side—Whatever means necessary.
Another time-skip has passed—The next day came and he whispers good morning to you as you’re still chained down on the bed. He apologizes for it being tight (your wrists are probably fucked ngl) so, he’ll loosen them up a little but make sure you don’t run away, okay 👁👁 He’ll be looking at you through the camera (!?) so don’t do anything sus, okay 🧎‍♀️ sorry i love this voice drama so much
Then, someone rang the doorbell—So, Yandere-kun very gently (INTIMIDATINGLY) tells you to not be too loud as he went to go see who it is…Has a few conversation about that person, acting like he’s a normal human-being there for a second and soon—He comes back to you and you asked who it was. He said it was no one important, just the landlord…looking for a lost cat.
“…I sure hope they find it soon.”
♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎
(SOBBING)
“BRIEF SUMMARY” MY ASS—Sorry, I had too much fun translating and commentating on this lmao ☠️☠️ ITS SO FUCKING GOOD. I’m sure there were a few error in this, but like—I wish I have the general knowledge down at least so that you could understand what happened 🤡 Apologies for that lol
Please listen to the actual audio drama, it’s free on youtube—I swear it’s a different experience with voice on. It changed my life fr だいきりASMR is a hidden diamond in the rough, why is no one talking about them 😩 I’m gonna go listen to more of their content, and I’ll share some with you all if I find something more interesting to translate and commentate on lol 👀 chaotically, if y’all are into that haha
Also, I love how someone can portrait a yandere like this—A yandere that doesn’t rely too much on violence and I love the fact that he’s not just the typical sadistic type of Yandere, yknow? 😭 Like he’s just some poor pathetic bastard who fell in love with the wrong person, at the wrong time—So, you can’t help but kinda feel bad for him ☠️ PEOPLE TAKE NOTES.
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xnightmare-eyesx · 1 year ago
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Hi, love your work on arts and writings. I wanna ask your advices, what do you use to type your stories? Google docs? And how do you work on it? Like, focus on finishing it or take your times with it?
Hello!
I use google docs for my stories but sometimes I’ll write little notes on post-it notes with key points. For example I have another long fic I’m working on for Pokémon, Ive written a bunch of notes so whenever I feel inspired to write a few lines I look back on those notes.
The way I work on most of my writing is that I sort of stitch the scenes and flow of the story in my head. Where’s the high going, how low are we gonna dip, should I add fluff or silly? In my brain I can also sort of see how I would put the picture to words. I also noticed that I try to write stuff as if someone’s going to read it out loud. If I pretend someone’s going to read it for a crowd I can keep the flow of sentences even.
I do take my time with my writing. I know what I wanna write, I have my bullet points, but really it’s all up to when I have time.
If I have down time between work and irl stuff I usually either draw, write, or game, and for example, I’ve been trying to write the next update of Glowflies, I know what I wanna write, I see it in my head, but I haven’t had the flow and inspo to sit and bang out another 9,000 words yet. I do chip away at it, either with edits or a few more lines. I originally wanted it out by the 14th but some things have come on that might push it back.
Then again it is a fan work i am doing in my free time! Writing and art take time, and I don’t wanna rush the process like it’s a school essay. But I don’t wanna pull a game of thrones on y’all and never update so sometimes music helps me sit down long enough and write some things. It all depends on how much time and energy I have after work and irl stuff.
Some other general writing advices I use is to try and not use a -ly word that often. Suddenly. Badly, sadly, gladly, angrily. I try to describe the emotion instead. Though I see my pitfalls in that where I’ll write too much about eyes. But it is my brand basically so-
And I do pov switch often. It’ll jump from Ramon to Bullfrog, so I always try to make sure the read knows who’s speak and who’s the one thinking by repeating their names. ‘Bullfrog wanted this. He really needed this time. Ramon jumped to get it because he could read Bullfrog’s face.’ Something like that. For me it helps myself so I don’t get lost in the action and dialogue.
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tutuandscoot · 2 years ago
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Ok my beautiful people! I have a bit of a treat for you today (we’ll idk if it’s a ‘treat’ like a good thing/ like something y’all want but.. anyway).
Since I’ve been feeling incredibly guilty over not posting regularly lately (soz..life/mental health/my love of sleep) I’ve got a new kind of post for you today that I’ve kinda wanted to do for a while but didn’t really have the balls to/not sure if it’s what people want/turn out good.
So. I FINALLY found a working link to Prince at 2017 nationals! Its not on yt or vimeo or any other standard video site and i just randomly stumbled across it in this master post (i will be spending some time working my way through all of this). So THANK YOU OP.
So i thought it would be fun to do a little live commentary/first reaction video since i cant do this on any other comp skate bc i think ive seen them all! (Other than bby/junior vm comps).
I apologise for the voice reveal in advance and if the quality is trash.. its my first time doing this:
So here it is with my commentary below. And here is a link to the actual video with TSN commentary
https://vimeo.com/844170347
*writing this next part after recording it:
•I’m sorry I didn’t realised I said ‘like’ so much but I didn’t say ‘um’ as much as I thought. so I’ll work on that.
•apologies for the scratchy sound the whole way through I was playing with my earphone mic
•Things I didn’t say watching it that I’d wish I had:
-FUCK, Tessa just looks so damn good in that costume. Like her L E G S. the quality of her leg extensions and toe point- like she doesn’t have the longest legs in the world but in this they do look so long.
-Scootie is precious AF in this whole thing- esp the K+C when the score comes up he was so excited and happy bc he thought maybe it wasn’t good with the music being wrong/twizzles sloppy
-Hip hop isnt my thing (knowledge wise) so there wasn’t a lot of technical/dance analysis that I would maybe do in more balletic/contemporary programs
-I know WP and CP were still to skate so the gap would shrink but can we just take a moment for the 22 point gap between them and the next team!
- I say in it it’s great how R+T don’t talk through the program but I wish they’d shut up when VM are in the k+c so we can hear them.
SO, if y’all found that interesting/bearable I’d love to do more but won’t bombard you with them if it’s not what people want- I love writing detailed posts and still plan to do that bc I don’t speak anywhere near as eloquently/comprehensively as I write, but these are quicker (but more expensive) to make and I guess I naturally would say things out loud that I don’t think to write and vis versa, so it could be good for that reason (for myself as well seeing what I pick up on in the moment). So even though all the others won’t be ‘first reaction’ videos I think it still might be fun. I would also be SUPER KEEN to do a group commentary with some of you fine people, after I watched this one, getting others takes live I think would be really cool.. but we can get to that later/work it out if anyone is interested.
Let me know what y’all think of this please. Again, soz for the voice reveal, the ‘shits’ (yes, I swear). Hopefully I can do some more nuanced ones in the future with more practice.
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loud-sturniolos · 10 months ago
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hi y’all😍 I need to rant abt life so sorry but not rlly xx
Umh I’m staring a new school, bc my mental health is shit and I cant be in a mainstream school anymore, but im stressed tf out. They dont allow phones (the schools mostly known for behaviour and phones get stolen apparently), but they allow MP3 players, so I got an MP3 player bc my brother threw away his awhile ago (fuck him fr/j), and it didnt fucking work. So we went to the store to get another one instead of ordering online, and it works, but idk how to download music, so my brother was gonna help me; guess where this mf is right now? Mf is an hour away from me, drinking with his friends 😡 doesn’t even know when he’s coming home.
I haven’t been in a school since last September, but i haven’t had a proper day in school since fucking June last yr or some shit. I literally SOBBED b4, I’m so stressed. The uniform feels TERRIBLE, I’m in a year below class bc they have no fucking room in the year im actually in, and the class is all girls😟 (Not saying girls are bad, js makes me feel kinda dysphoric🤗) ALSO. These fuckers want me to walk jn BY MYSELF and talk to reception, like no ty. I hwven’t met these bitches, I’m not talking to them.
Anyways I’m so sleepy that I’m seeing things, and hearing things, and I’m getting kinda delusional and the intrusive thoughts r here‼️‼️ thats so fun😍😍
ALSO I FORGOT TO ADD BC I HQVENT BEEN IN SCHCOOL FOR SO LONG IDK HOW TO PACK A BAG. I LITERALLY DO NOT KNOW IF IVE PACKED MY BAG CORRECTLY. LIKE 😟😟😟 I need help bro.
Rant over🤗 (Probably isn’t tbh, I rant a lot💀)
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hmslusitania · 2 years ago
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I was tagged by @littlespoonevan to share a line without context that I’m proud of and. I am still on original work bullshit and also its Sunday so instead y’all can have the most recent lines ive written!
Sam woke to a dog licking him in the face.
“Sophia, get off,” he mumbled, reaching for his dog’s muzzle to push her away. The dog didn’t respond to the command, and he groggily opened his eyes to try and scold her.
He wasn’t in his room.
Instead of walls and piles of books and a messy writing desk, there was a crisply maintained wardrobe and, leaning against the bureau with a cup of coffee and one arm folded across his chest, Callum O’Dea.
“Agatha, get down,” Sam tried instead, sitting upright. Callum’s dog hopped off the bed and hurled herself against Callum’s shins companionably.
Sam was sitting in Callum’s bed.
He’d woken up in a bed that belonged to Callum before, but it had been the one in the room he kept at Em’s house, and when Sam had woken up, Callum had already been long gone. Not just staring at him.
“Uh, hi,” Sam said. Callum’s eyebrow arched and the events of Sam’s life since the premiere party slammed into him.
He held up his hand and turned it over, anxious. There was no hole through his palm anymore, nothing but freshly grown, undamaged skin. Even the freckles that had been on the back of his hand were in place.
“Thanks,” he said.
“Sure,” Callum replied. “How did you get into my apartment, Sam?”
“I remembered where you stashed your spare key when you first moved in,” Sam said. “But I definitely lost consciousness on your couch, so I’m not sure how…”
Callum looked down at his dog and patted her on the shoulders, but he didn’t look away before Sam could catch the tinge of pink on his cheeks.
Because you know how sometimes you get severely wounded and instead of going to the hospital you break into your best friend’s brother’s house for medical attention, since he’s got magic that fixes injuries, and also you’re both gay and stupid about each other? And have matching golden retrievers and a troubled romantic history with each other?
Tagging @rhysiana @starry-eyed-guttersnipe and whoever else wants to do so
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