#writes more pass!Hermit lore...

[the-s1lly-corner]

Creepypastas of your choice with a mysterious reader that has been with slender man the longest/was the first creepypasta

eyeless jack, laughing jack, slenderman, and jeff x reader who was the first creepypasta/has been with slenderman the longest!

NOTE that jeffs part is written as platonic since im still not comfortable writing romance for him, but the other two can be seen as either or! eyeless jack was chosen thanks to the admin personally hcing that eyeless jack and slenderman have beef over living in the same woods, laughing jack was picked because haha funny clown who is also old as shit reader is implied to be nonhuman, to explain how theyve been around for so long so! admin headcannons that zalgo was the one who made all the non-human creepypastas and they may or may not come into play here that aside, hope you enjoy!

EYELESS JACK:

now he doesnt want to control who you hang out and who you dont hang out with... however ej isnt all the keen on the fact that you sometimes hang out with the tall lanky forest demon.. but he holds his tongue. their basic beef is that they mostly fight over space; slenderman is possessive over his woods, and ej fled to the woods after he started eating flesh to live as a hermit... is a little suspicious on how you seem to know so much about the curse-thing that turned from from a human to a man eating monster.. though lets up if you open up about things (cough cough zalgos role in everything cough cough) soooo.... as for actual relationship stuff? honestly as long as you dont bring slenderman around you guys have a pretty solid relationship! especially since you know so much of whats going on you kind of fill him in on a bunch of stuff.. like how people fill in the new guy at work about the drama and lore of the workplace, you know? is a relieved that youre not exactly human, so a lot of his worry of accidentally attacking you while in one of his feral blood frenzy things is minimal... sits.. tension in the beginning that melts as time passes and explanations are given, you know?

LAUGHING JACK:

honestly hes just happy to have someone whos not super young compared to him/was there to see what was going on at least a century ago.. or more (fandom wiki says origin story takes place in 1800s, jack is OOOOOOOLLLD) so its nice having someone he can talk to about stuff from the past. and to joke about stuff from the past... and to have someone actually. GET IT. you know? really strengthens your bond, as well as reassures him that youre likely not going to die anytime soon due to your mortality... i always think about that stuff for immortal characters/characters who can technically outlive everyone, especially for jack since i feel he has abandonment issues... shrugs... you guys probably exchange tips and tricks for loads of things. just two old people in love but they both act like reckless young adults (assuming reader matches his energy). has no huge thoughts or opinions on slenderman since i dont think they would interact often :0

SLENDERMAN:

i mean i think it would be a given that you guys, against all odds, have stuck together and grown close. slenderman is reclusive, very much so. i mention that eyeless jack is a hermit, so naturally ej doesnt connect with many people. but slenderman takes that to a whole new level. i mean he barely even interacts with his proxies (still dont know how im going to write toby, masky, and hoodie. esp masky n hoodie since... theres the creepypasta/marble hornets thing.. shrugs... thats a problem for future admin)

so consider this a huge victory that he hasnt gotten rid of you in some way and has instead let you into his.. well i was about to say heart but i dont think zalgo considered giving him one when it was creating him.. though.. it is nice to have someone just as ancient as him, makes it easier to relate to people AND youre also a creature like him, made from zalgo? even more ability to relate to you.. though its a very quiet dynamic, slenderman isnt much of a talker so i hope you dont mind carrying conversations!

JEFF THE KILLER:

pushing once again that this segment is strictly platonic since admin isnt comfy with writing romantic for jeff so they just had an interesting idea for him!

very similar to eyeless jacks bit where you fill him in one a bunch of lore and how things work, as well as filling him in on the teeny tiny detail that demons and monsters exist. jeff is a little different in admins au/hc, since he kind of just. exists rather than being created explicitly to cause issues + hes new to the being a creepypasta thing (if you can call being on the run and being off the grid for the past decade or so new, admin is working on timeline stuff </3) (new in comparison to the other characters hush hush) so a lot of your dynamic is filling him in on things as well as perhaps even offering some sort of guidance in how to actually go about interacting with these creatures that he know.. just has access to.. torn between dad slenderman because hes not TOTALLY evil and cold in admins interpretation, but also that one jeff the killer vs slenderman fall out boy video lives rent free in his head. the beef would be insane, honestly... jeff doesnt have much of a sound idea outside of you being more of a guidance figure for him... person with their nonhuman guide my favorite trope that needs to be in more stuff especially in horror media where the characters are antagonists and shit

[cryptskeep]

For your POTS post idk exactly why but I feel like Mumbo or Cleo would work well for a fic :3

Okay before I actually write I always do some brainstorming and I think y'all might enjoy this bit bc its where I make up lore

So this is a more modern au for right now because if I have to deal with the medical system, so do my blorbos

the hermits are a disability club or something, they essentially all got together to form a community for others with chronic illnesses and disabilities

Mumbo

General Lore:

works from home, some kind of blueprint guy, idk engineer or something I don't know anything about STEM jobs

used to bike a lot when he was younger but now can't really do that

is one of the only people who know how to drive

has a Very fabulous mustache

POTS Lore:

Has a really severe case of POTS (We're twinning)

constantly passes out if he stands up too fast

tries to carry salt around and water but honestly forgets most of the time

has really low blood pressure and often just kinda dies for a few hours to a few days

got peer-reviewed as disabled long before he actually realized he was and started the diagnosis process

walks with a cane for extra support

Cleo

General Lore:

seamstress, has her own business for mainly clothes, but also makes little dolls and clothes for those dolls

if she's feeling good, she sometimes takes shifts at a local bar as a bartender

Mom friend mom friend mom friend

adamantly denies being the mom friend

tries her damndest to mind her own business but her friends are so damn stupid she can't or else they'll die

POTS Lore:

has been diagnosed since she was young

is the one that actually carries around salt and hydration stuff

does not do well in the heat, like at all

doesn't pass out as much as mumbo but gets really dizzy whenever she stands up

has a lot of heart palpitations and doesn't make it any better by drinking coffee to stay awake

[wormtime123]

AAAAAAAAAAAA DRAMATURGY EPILOGUEEE

I love the lengthy wrap up of so many loose ends, the slow mend of things torn and that utter contentment to be found with people just existing right there. This is going to be my go-to comfort fic for found family to re-read over and over and over and over

Now I wanna pick your brain on all the bits; worldwalker shapeshifting Gem? Its so coool I love it. When did you decide to give her and others (Scar, Cub?) powers? What did Cub actually do at the end of Grumbot there? What was your favorite part of the epilogue to write? And which part was the most emotional for you? (tough question, I know I can't choose between Pearl & Gem's or Pearl & Grian's conversations)

WHEW dear god thank you for presenting me a pass to go insane on a silver platter. i’ll be putting my answers under a read more so i don’t explode people’s feeds with nonsense

most of the magic decisions made are based ~mostly in what i know about canon, i just ended up filling in some blanks and playing around with what’s already there! i’m endlessly fascinated by gem’s dimension-hopping (empires isn’t addressed in dramaturgy, but i operate on everything she said about her powers in e2) and i think the idea that she can open portals at will and freely travel between worlds/universes in a way that other players can’t is amazing. then the shapeshifting just made sense to me in how she changes her appearance around to fit into whatever character she wants to take on in each world.

cub and scar lore i’m a lot less familiar with since i only know of certain clips about their vex deal, but i kind of treat it similarly to gem in that i assume they can shift their forms around (ie. how often scar changes to fit a character like gem does, cub going from old man to s8 e-boy skin) and have a peculiar knowledge around portals (ie. the big dig, scar using his “wizard portals” to travel between seasons.) however i think gem has a different kind of expertise working with portals with how often she dimension-hops, so those two were kind of just doing unethical science at the rift to see what stuck lol.

the rift on its own is its whole thing in my Fanon Brain, but i have a strong image of it as a living, breathing entity that sucks things in and spits them back out in other spaces indiscriminately. dramaturgy scar describes it as hungry and i think that’s about as apt as it gets. stuck perpetually wanting to consume yet unable to hold anything in. then one of my biggest plot problems to solve was making the story line up with grian’s lore, aka grumbot (prime) getting tossed in the canon timeline ominously hinting at the other grian’s crimes, so i asked myself how dramaturgy hermits could have weaponized the rift and that’s where i landed! i admittedly don’t have a specific answer to how cub would have aggravated the rift enough to make it go hogwild in chapter 10, but i personally just imagined him figuring it out at one point or another by throwing shit in until something worked

dear god this is already getting long but epilogue!!! my answer for favorite scene to write is a little anticlimactic but i love writing all the evo flashbacks. if you couldn’t tell i am completely evo enamored. i love the strange, off-putting, nostalgic innocence of “something unpreventable and life-altering is about to happen and they Don’t Know.” i love them working together to get to the stronghold and entering the end portal thinking it’s going to be another task of teamwork as always and then just *silence* on the other end. amazing incredible tragic love it

(also on that note i loved writing the scene atop the mansion. just one last hermit acting entirely too normal while subjecting pearl to cursed knowledge before we go)

and lastly for most emotional to write i’d definitely say the scene at the hobbit hole! i’ve had that one as well as the sleepover at impulse’s in the back of my mind for so long i’m just glad i got it out. getting there was like the end of an era for me. everything with grian and pearl finally being back together but still not quite on the same page. i think pearl seeing grian so taken aback in the face of the tangible proof of his actions and mumbo’s feelings was the straw that broke the camel’s back, because at this point in the story pearl’s finally willing to see herself in mumbo’s situation. she’s finally realizing how badly she needs this specific closure but grian’s too busy going ???my actions… have consequences? i can’t just run off into the night with no negative impact on the people around me?

(which is of course also a matter of a warped sense of self-image and understanding emotions, but grian will go on murder sprees in the 3rd life time loop box before exercising an ounce of self-reflection, more at 11.) and only after seeing pearl shaking like a sad wet chihuahua clutching this random notebook of his like it’s the sacred texts does he really start to grasp how genuinely bad it’s been for her. like that would have been obvious to anyone who’s normal but whatever. i love studying skyblings like bugs

ANYWAYS. i hope you enjoyed this thought dump and thank you again for the ask i owe you my life

[treepan0]

You know what? Koall lore dump + Janemba headcanon writing stuff (because it is needed to understand Koall)

So usually when writing Janemba I use his background from Buu's fury over the movie, as it makes him a lot more flexible and easier to write than being left over evil juice from villains before him.

From there I expanded: how did he get in there? How did he impact the world before his imprisonment? Why has he locked away? What about his family? Etc.

That last example is actually where Koall got her start lore wise, I was designing this demon lady and randomly thought "hey, what if she was Janemba's mom?" At one point, it kind of stuck.

Other details came later, for example her bodice was inspired by one of my first magical girl animes: Princess tutu. Usually it has its own modifications and flair, similar to how madoka magica changed it so it wasn't too similar legally.

So yes Koall is a dark magical girl, however I like using my knowledge of the trope to make her less annoying. To clarify Universe 2 attempted to parody magical girls, but kind of misses why they're so beloved.

In other words: universe two only scrapes the surface of potential for a magical girl character, thus Koall was born from my knowledge, disappointment and needing a bit more fan lore for my beloved demon son.

So going through the lore here now: Koall is from a magical system that isn't really common anymore, however she has gone through and learned as much as she can about it. Slowly she has unlocked many powerful transformations, however the seventh she was advised to never teach another to use unless to be a replacement for herself, as its power was to an absurdity and everyone else wanted to maintain order as it is.

Koall of course accepted this fact and moved on, eventually learning of universe two's magic system, she took the time to teach some a thing or two in her earlier years with this state. Eventually after a long while passes she feels lonely, and visits her original home for a bit despite being banished.

And while she is initially caught for being present when she was not meant to be, she's handed a baby boy told his name is Janemba and kicked back out with the kid. Knowing that children have their minds affected by what they see from an early age, she takes a more modest appearance at least until the boy grows up fully.

These early years take a long time and she's immediately learned why Janemba was kicked out with her, they were afraid of his power more than anything else. Seeing a chance to be maliciously compliant but also getting attached, she raises him to adulthood and never once held the truth from him, but told and reminded him that she loves him dearly, and that a biological connection was never needed to be her son.

This is in fact the truth from her, she just never told him that they tried to banish him, because they didn't tell her directly. Eventually she lets him travel to where he was thrust into her arms, and that's where the backstory of being a kingpin of an organized crime ring back in the demon realm begins. It leads to a situation where Janemba stays in the demon realm most of the time, but visits Koall on the holidays.

Koall doesn't mind this arrangement one but, and is just happy to see her son happy. Unfortunately one day she loses everything, as Beerus visits Koall to tell her he had to seal her son away in the soul scrubber. it leads to a sense of grief that consumes her ever since, at this point all knowledge of Koall are just legends of either a powerful dark magical girl, or a powerful succubus that terrified many.

Either way she's pretty much a very sad hermit people haven't seen a glimpse of, in like thousands of years and won't see again until Janemba's freed. Additionally she's under the same laws as gods of destruction, angels and Kais, Koall cannot interfere with the struggles over other beings but can teach them a thing or two.

[the-monkey-ruler]

How was wu cheng’en able to access so much knowledge for his book?

I mean, the story of Xuanzang's travel was fairly popular and the building blocks of Xiyouji were all right there! An example of a previous interaction of Xiyouji is Zaju being a casting different story but already having some demons and arcs that were already set. Wukong, Bajie, Wujing, Sanzang, and Bailong were already there as characters but it was the Wu Cheng'en version that was what gave them that character change Wukong's character throughout the years.

When it comes to the transformation of the character that is something I would highly suggest looking into Transforming Monkey: Adaptation and Representation of a Chinese Epic by Hongmei Sun for a more in-depth study of like the changing of the legend passed down in a good cohesive manner which is what I think is at least a great way to simplify how these legends were told and retold and changed depending on the periods they were in. The story was insanely popular already and it wasn't terribly hard to either hear the story to even see a performance or oral telling of the tale. But there was a lack of writings over the story in compassion as such those were a bit harder to find.

But in short, Wu Cheng'en was a scholar was while he failed the imperial examinations he was still devoted to spending his life as an artisan, including classical literature, popular stories, and anecdotes. He did become an official and had postings in both Beijing and Changxing County, but he resigned and spent the rest of his life writing stories and poems in his hometown.

During this time he became an accomplished writer, producing both poetry and prose and became friends with several prominent contemporary writers. So he has a history of writing already, being active in other works (though none similar to Xiyouji). Dissatisfied with the political climate of the time and with the corruption of the world, he spent much of his life as a hermit. Considering the political commentary and the vast amount of Buddist, Taoist, and Chinese folklore that is within Xiyouji, Wu Cheng'en was considered to be a great candidate by other reports to be someone to have a collection of lore, literature, political information, and the skills to put it all together in his later life as a hermit. In the early 20th century, Hu Shih and his students conducted textual analysis and research into Qing dynasty records and suggested Wu as the author. Translator W. J. F. Jenner points out that although Wu had knowledge of Chinese bureaucracy and politics, the novel itself doesn't include any political details that "a fairly well-read commoner could not have known." It is unknown how much of the novel was created, and how much was simply compiled and edited, since much of the legend behind Journey to the West already existed in folk tales.

[ellytraoflight]

okay.

there's the obvious bit of him being the voice and one half of the hermitcraft recap writing team. if we go with the lore of watchers being the audience, pix is quite literally a watcher in the sense that he watches half of all the hermits episodes each week.

pix in empires seasons one and 2 created the maps and occasionally narrates the story like he's telling a tale. this was more obvious in empires season 2, where he created the lore of the titans and filled in the thousands of years that have passed between the Rapture and season two, but he did some similar narration bits in season one as well. season one pix he also apparently has prophetic visions, although I'm not sure if this is a fanon thing or canon as I can't find anything on it and it never showed up in any of the (few) pix empires season one episodes I watched.

if empires season 1 pix has the ability to watch the future, empires season 2 pix has the ability to watch the past. in lore, litematica represents his visions of ancient ruined cities that he's able to view the history of and reconstruct. we know from the premise of evo that watchers can manipulate time, so it makes sense (given that they are WATCHERS) that they can see into different time periods as well.

i know there's the popular fandom image of the watchers as these all-powerful eldritch entities, but I think it'd be funny if there are watchers that use their all powerful watcher abilities to be journalists. sure, we can criticize you and torment you and force you to partake in our evil games, but we're actually on our tenth cup of coffee for the week and if we've gotta watch this shit yall are doing then we're making everyone else watch it as well. alternatively, pix is an all powerful being that sometimes pops down to play at being an archaeologist for a few months.

i also think that pix in that purple eldritch horror watcher-type aesthetic would be very neat.

watcher pixlriffs truthers where yall at

[tev-the-random]

I AM AN ABSOLUTE JUMBLED MESS, SO HAVE SOME OF MY MESSY THOUGHTS ABOUT THE CROSSOVER TODAY, IN NO PARTICULAR ORDER:

So far, we've got Tango in Gobland, Scar in Tumble Town, Pearl and Joe in Chromia, Cleo and Xisuma in Eversea, Keralis and Jevin in Sanctuary. Impulse and Grian are kind of making their own places. Did I miss anyone?

There are two kinds of emperors in this crossover: the ones who stick to the lore and claim they don't know the Hermits and the ones who drop everything and yell "MY RANCHER!".

Pix fits the second category, though a lot quieter.

Pearl fits the first, which is strange, considering her role as Literally God. At this point we really can't be sure of what exactly this means for Pearl or for Sausage. What is she?

Gem is her own category. There's something very sus going on with her.

Jimmy absolutely freaking out over seeing Tango again though-

I think at this point it's canon that either people have nametags floating above their heads or everyone is wearing an actual name tag and that's how they all know each other's names even though they never met.

Scott just got a magical flash grenade to the eye. How is this man seeing anything after the entire sky erupted in magic light-

Sausage. I'm not surprised. Not even disappointed. Xisuma most certainly is, though.

Is it a custom in Sanctuary to kiss people on the cheeks or is Sausage like... actively making out with newcomers? I know this is a very weird question, but it's Sausage we're talking about.

Joel adopted the one night armour stand joke lmao-

Tango freaking out over every little thing he sees.

Murder is canonically legal in Empires.

Grian is a force of chaos, as expected.

Rancher duo collabs again, pog? With horns and everything?

And Tango is now an engineer in Gobland, which means Fwhip might have some more to do other than poke the Sheriff. This crossover is a win all around for Jimmy, except for the toy jokes, which may increase, but I will thoroughly ignore that-

There's No Curse In Glimmer Grove.

Sausage keeping tabs on all the Hermits. That' either means that he's not as unsuspecting of them as he may seem or it implies that all Hermits are now their own empiresonas-

Grian's appearance in Tumble Town was so incredibly ominous, holy sh-

Shelby trying to be hospitable but at the same time being a witch inviting unsuspecting people into her hut in the cursed swamp after claiming the fog eats souls and pulling out a scythe. I'd be terrified.

Hats and mounts get passed all around. Is this a crime?

Why does only Pearl get an outfit change? I mean, I know why, but like, canonically speaking, why did it happen?

Still, I felt a bit teary-eyed upon seeing the Arena Duo together again, the Gilded Helianthia dress only made it better. I missed these guys interacting so much, and I don't know if I'm in denial like Sausage or if I'm just about to open a Word document to write an entire one shot about it-

Sausage had a vision of Gilded Helianthia, I'm not ok

Oh god, now we have both Joel and Scar yelling LORE in the same place, save us-

So convenient that E!False decided to travel far away right when HC!False shows up. Smart decision, yes, but at the same time, the fanfic writers must now assemble to make the two of them meet.

Ok, so apparently some people remember the Life series and some people don't. I guess that means that some of the characters, such as Jimmy, Joel and Scar, are the same characters from the Life series after they lost their third life. Other characters, such as Scott and Pearl, are not. But what does this mean?

Fwhip sounded so hurt for a moment when he thought Jimmy made Scar his new deputy. This man is not ok.

Soup Group? Soup Group.

Big ears Scar is cursed.

Sausage is too hospitable for his own good.

Scar's deputy and moral support arc. I'm happy for it, but at the same time, I don't trust it.

On one hand, I do think the wallpaper in Tumble Town looks very pretty and it would be so sad to destroy it. On the other hand, Jimmy deserves some dignity and shouldn't take this slander anymore, I swear to god-

Poor Impulse is so confused, why is this cat lady yelling at him, why are animals walking on two legs, where is he, he's having a crisis-

Stratos' class system gets called out, finally.

Just when Joel was so close to convincing the fandom that he's tall, the Empires' folk shut it down and confirm that they're only playing along and he is not, in fact, tall. Short king is back?

Katherine, when you go around telling everyone, including literal strangers your secret, I don't think it can be considered a secret anymore.

Fwhip encourages crime, such a good deputy of the law.

But then again, it's not stealing, it's borrowing-

Seeing the empires from the Hermits' perspectives is crazy, I hadn't realised just how massive these empires got.

The Hermits are staying for a while. I'm so happy this isn't going to be a one-episode thing, I'm dying to see where this goes!

(I'm trying to watch as many perspectives as I can. Some of them haven't come out yet, and I don't feel like watching Keralis' hour long episode. Can someone tell me what happens there?)

[antirepurp]

has his world been out for long enough for me to spill some splatinum thoughts i had while writing it? and some joestar stand thoughts in general? bc i think i will do exactly that under the cut hee hoo

so part3′s ending was always a bit rough to me, i think it is to most people idk? because we had this whole journey and buildup to the fight against dio and then we get shot with the “same type of stand” deal that was not foreshadowed whatsoever and it was like ok fam if you insist y’know. not the best writing admittedly. but it’s not an inherently flawed concept, in fact it has potential to be fun if executed correctly (which i tried to do in his world, though whether i succeeded or not is not in my hands)

that brings me to my point of hey, let’s take it a step further. it’s not just the same type of stand, make it The Same Stand yeah? make it spicy

it’s not conceptually that far fetched, when “jonathan” had a stand that was hermit purple light or whatever, making him and joseph have the same stands effectively. probably wasn’t intentional but it opens up possibilities, right? ig there’s the argument that dio isn’t a born joestar but i chose to brush over that for the sake of adding more contrast between him and jotaro. not like jojo doesn’t bend the rules on occasion anyway *cough* whitesnake

so with this we get a stand constructed of the world and star platinum, which was dio’s stand with time stop abilities. but it splits bc blood is a finicky bitch, especially with the joestars, and he loses half of it, the half i kept dubbing the spirit. and it passes down to the joestars, to the best available user, that being jotaro ironically enough, but considering the other options were an old man, a woman in her late 30s who’s known for her kindness, and like a toddler or however old josuke was at the time?? yeah jotaro it is

the details of star platinum are in his world and im not going into the quirks, other than it and the world are the same shit and both had the innate desire to become one again - which kind of meant that the other stand had to cease to exist. it’s all in the fic. but the most interesting bit about it comes later on i think and im dying to explore it it greater detail

dio’s diary, y’know? how it details plans for the world to transform into the ultimate stand and what have you?

would that not be possible with star platinum under these circumstances? in fact, would star platinum be more than ideal for that recipe?

additionally, if we go with that star platinum is not really jotaro’s stand, not his true one so to say, what would such a stand be? i mean, splat does differ more from the stands in jotaro’s immediate family, with hermit purple and holly’s stand being vines, and stone free being strings (sometimes in a humanoid form, but i digress). josuke and giorno are exceptions to this, though i excuse the latter with him being dio’s direct offspring and the former with something about the power of crazy diamond festering within him for years and adapting a form more based on its user than the ability itself. perhaps that’s another thing to muse about, what decides the form a given stand is going to take

but yeah. funny how star platinum is one of the most like, hm, basic stands available and not even that op to begin with from a meta perspective, but it’s the one that has a ton of interesting lore potential tied to it

[dailyadventureprompts]

Hello, I was wondering if you could write up some mid-level Hello. Requesting some adventure hooks that incorporate dragonborn characters, since I play a dragonborn born in my game. Thanks. I’m looking forward to Fighter Week soon.

Villain Ally: Ilxadon the Vanquished

“ Won’t you join this old wyrm for a game? It’ll help pass the time between now and armageddon” 

Setup: What happens to evil when the story ends? After the heroes are victorious and darkness is banished back to whatever dank hole it crawled out of? Old Ilxadon would know, given that he’s lived through it all before, perhaps he can give the party some advice as they near they weather their own journey’s tribulations.  

Little more than a hermit in his current existence, clutched on the edge of the world, Ilxadon was once an aspiring dark lord, who’s grand designs are today mostly forgotten save by the longest lived sages, and those celestial figures who still hold a grudge against the mad old lizard. 

Though mostly forgotten, the wizened shaman’s crimes are manifold,  the list topped by the capture the sungod and using blasphemous rites to drink the light from the divinity’s soul. Ilxadon always wanted to shine brightly, but his actions caused a months long eclipse that through the world into chaos and brought a coalition of heroes and demigods to defeat him and the little army of followers he’d built up with his stolen power. 

With the coalition triumphant, the stolen powers returned, and the god restored to their place in the heavens, Ilxadon was left in a story state, rendered immortal by his consumption of divine humors but trapped forever in a blind and burnt-out body that his enemies had no trouble imprisoning.  Time turns however, and sustained by the guttering embers of his power the defeated villain had only to wait for his bonds to rust, his prison to erode, and his jailers to die off. 

While most evils would have gone mad in captivity, Ilxadon has simply become benignly senile, drifting off into fond recollections of his old schemes while puttering about the ruins of his old prison like a dottering old beachcomber. 

Adventure Hooks: 

The heroes may unwittingly stumble into the former villain in some innocuous place, such as on the outskirts of an ancient dungeon or traveling up the road towards a plot-relevant volcano. He’ll likely be searching for something he’s lost, though what exactly it is and where he lost it fade in. If the party manages to reunite him with his treasure, he’ll gladly act as their impromptu guide, though his directions may take a turn for the rambling at points. Possible objects for this task include: The staff he’s enchanted to see through, some marbles, a precious stone he fashioned into a gamepiece, or an unprecious stone he thought was neat and decided to take with him because it was lucky,

Ilxadon can also appear as the advisor to a younger, upstart villain, interested in acquiring the power the shaman used to capture and chain the solar god, or just looking for advise. The failed tyrant often councils caution and graciousness, even in wickedness, and will perhaps betray his mentee if the “ disrespectful punk” goes too far in violating the oldtimer’s sense of propriety.   

A party of a more.... villainous persuasion may seek out Ilxadon as a sort of mentor, perhaps hearing about his unfinished legacy, or just that there’s an immortal sage of evil lurking around some cursed ruins somewhere in want of someone to dispense ominous lessons to. 

If the party ends up befriending Ilxadon, they may end up taking him along with them on their adventures, as the old lizard has quite the archive of apocryphal lore and blasphemous knowledge squirled away in the dusty corners of his mind. These lucid incites usually come about in the middle of one of the many impenetrably obtuse games of dice and counting Ilxadon is fond of, either recalled from a time before his imprisonment or dreamt up during his long incarceration. Learning these manifold games takes time, patience, and more than a shred of kindness, but can be well worth it, as Ilxadon thinks best when he is matched by a challenging opponent. 

Art

[crash-hawk]

Hey it’s still a Passerine AU!  Just with added guest stars!  Who are...slowly becoming the actual stars but NEVER MIND THAT--

@crash-hawk i’m so sorry this is supposed to be a passerine au this is supposed to b—

[ladymischievous]

Here is My Completely Self-indulgent Medivh Essay! OKAY HERE WE GO!

Whenever I think about it, I find that Medivh’s situation was really a fucked up one. Possession by Sargeras aside, his story deals a lot with trauma, neglect, abuse, and the selfishness of a parent. I think it’s really easy to forget about all of that with Blizz’s writing and the fact that Medivh was a really powerful mage.

Medivh didn’t have a choice in things for the majority of his life. Ignoring Chronicle’s softening of Aegwynn (the only thing I actually liked that was added to her lore was her friendship with Moroes), she straight up used Nielas Aran to have a baby and then came back to use him as free childcare because she wasn’t looking to be a mother.

Disclaimer, Aegwynn is a complicated character who I really appreciate. She was a hero and probably the best Guardian, period. Yet, she was a very flawed character and I like that about her. She could be selfish, self righteous, and a smartass. Chronicle having her in love with Nielas and loving Medivh as her son is something I think took a lot away from her and the impact of her eventually bringing Medivh back. Aegwynn didn’t want love or to be a mother, she wanted to pass on the power of the Guardian to someone born from herself to spit in the eye of the Council of Tirisfal. Aegwynn did it because she considered them to be idiots and was petty.

Medivh was born with a future already chosen for him. He was to be the Guardian, he couldn’t be anything else. From the get-go, Medivh had little autonomy and it makes his mischievousness and eventual wilding out post-9-year-coma in the form of partying and living vibrantly make more sense. When you add Sargeras and him possessing Medivh since before he was born, it’s a double whammy. Medivh not only had no future of his own but was set up for failure from the very beginning.

I’ve always pictured Sargeras as being an abuser that gradually broke Medivh down. Whispering things to him throughout his life, making him think they were his own thoughts, gaslighting him, and suddenly stripping things away from him. Medivh had friends in Llane and Lothar, he also had his father. When he was about fourteen, the powers of the Guardian suddenly lashed out and killed Nielas. Medivh then fell into a coma that lasted for almost ten years. Medivh never got a chance to be a teenager and grow into an adult. He woke up and suddenly he was 23-24 years old. Lothar (now the kingdom’s champion) and Llane (now the king of Stormwind) had moved on in their lives, his father was dead, and time left Medivh behind. Physically he was an adult where he was likely still fourteen mentally. Medivh lost a good chunk of his life and likely would have felt horribly alone. I always figured a situation like that would be traumatizing and that would be something Sargeras would capitalize on. The long coma was just another part in his campaign to twist Medivh to his will.

But Medivh is the Guardian, he has to do his job, it was what he was born for. I could see this being the main reason he wilds out during his younger years. Trying to shake the trauma and anxieties, he clings onto things his loves and likes. He wants to make his own personality, his own choices, and his own life. He’s thinking like a teenager because, mentally and emotionally, he is one. This makes it easier for Sargeras to take advantage of him. To play on depression, anxieties, and the crushing weight the mantle of being the Guardian was.

Being the Guardian means you have amazing magical powers at your fingertips. You are Azeroth’s best line of defense, putting your life on the line to fight against threats that could decimate a planet. It’s also a lonely existence, since you have to keep your role a secret from the world at large. You have to forsake the ideas of relationships and being too close to people because you could make yourself vulnerable where you can’t afford to be. It’s a great honor to be the Guardian...if that’s what you wished to be. Again, Medivh never asked to be the Guardian, he was born to take on that role. So I imagine to him, it was more of a burden than anything else.

In Wrath of the Lich King, there’s an item you can fish from the Dalaran fountain called ‘Medivh’s Silver Coin’. It’s flavor text I think says a lot about Medivh and what he was going through. Sargeras and the Guardian were the dominant forces in his life, overshadowing who Medivh himself actually was as a person. It makes some of the new lore for him all the more tragic. Throwing parties, surrounding himself and filling his tower with people and things he liked. Only for it to be taken and destroyed once again by Sargeras. Moroes, who had survived the incident, seemed to legitimately care for Medivh. But having seen the horrors he did that killed so many of the tower’s denizens and party guests broke his mind. Medivh, out of care for the steward, sealed Moroes’ memories of the event away but he was never the same since. Thus put an end to Medivh’s gallas and vibrancy, he shut himself away as he fully realized his situation. Sargeras had taken everything from him.

So, who was Medivh as a person? Not the Guardian, not Sargeras, who is Medivh Aran? I think that when he’s able to make his own choices, Medivh is more inclined to at least try to do good.

In ‘The Last Guardian’, Medivh’s relationship with his mother is a complicated one. Aegwynn did abuse him with her reasons for giving birth to him and then neglecting him. Medivh understandably resented her but also still loved her because she was his mother. (Without going into anything from my personal life, I can understand the conflict of these feelings.) Sargeras at that point in his life had an iron grip hold over him, Medivh was his tool, his property. Using her own son, Sargeras spoke though him and called Aegwynn out on her bullshit. Right there Medivh could have killed her, instead he spared her and sent her away. Even with that anger and resentment he seized what autonomy he could and chose his love for her instead.

When Medivh was resurrected, free of both Sargeras and the Guardian, he chose to try to help Azeroth in what ways he could. Trying to warn them and nudge things into a better direction but events throughout ‘World of Warcraft’ undid a lot of it (the Bombing of Theramore being one example).

While the debate on whether Medivh is actually alive or is a ghost is still up in the air, I headcanon him as being alive. That Aegwynn gave him a new life to finally have for himself. The biggest issue being that Medivh is haunted by the events that happened to him. He’s a survivor, likely living as a hermit (and hating it) in his study, living with the trauma he’s stuck with. With him and Khadgar reuniting and apparently hanging out together in Karazhan, I hope that he can get a chance to heal.

If you read through all this, thank you, I hope that you enjoyed it.

​

[camtankerous]

please please talk to us about actual canary jimmy and those flour bastards

AH. okay well. If u insist

Okay im typing this on my phone as i pass out so pls excuse any mistypes and long winding sentences. This is a stream of consciousness that youve just uncorked my friend

ANYWAY. I really really love canary-and-coal-miner team rancher art, right? And i love birds, and strip mining in minecraft, so i thought. Well! What if i came up with a funny little au where tango is a coal miner and jimmy is his little canary buddy?

Of course, actual coal mining is very scary, and i only write funny goofy things, so this is Mined Craft™️ coal mining. Anyway, tango takes up a job working for some unnamed mining company working under TFC, since i love his mining videos

I havent decided which other hermits to include yet? Im def including grian, joel, and lizzy, since theyre often featured in jimmy’s non-minecraft videos. I dont want to include too many and risk bogging down the story bc i get too caught up in writing accurate voices for everyone, but i might also write in some cameos of bdubs and etho or something. I want to include scott but im afraid i wont be able to properly balance a characterization of him hamming up on the “why yes my ex husband DID disappear under mysterious circumstances and i got most of his items. Why do you ask :)” facade while also deep down being quite sad and upset about jimmy just vanishing off the face of the earth. And then if i DID balance it properly im afraid it would come off more angsty than intended

ANYWAY. Uh. I dont know much lore about hermitcraft bc im still catching up on the lore-heavy videos (i like to just listen to people build/design things while i strip mine in my own world), but i’m thinking there’s enough wacky magic hijinks that i could justify my idea

My idea being that jimmy actually wasnt ALWAYS a canary, he wound up getting turned into one due to [redacted] (bc i havent come up with that part yet and am not particularly pressed to do so). Jimmy used to be a canary hybrid but now he’s full canary - still the same on the inside, but now he’s a tiny bird that loves to cause problems

None of his friends know this happened to him, or else they would have been working hard to get him back to normal. Instead, grian notices two things about this particular canary: he’s way more belligerent and vocal than the other canaries, hardly acting like a prey animal at all, and he seems to be prone to winding up in the parts of the mine that get gas leaks. He’s actually starting to get concerned that this poor little bastard bird has brain damage at this point and thats why hes Like That

So, anyway, grian and the others start calling this canary Timmy, bc it kind of reminds them of their missing friend who was also a canary hybrid and a little shit with terrible luck. They tend to keep timmy on the sidelines bc theyre worried hes been through too much and dont want him passing out anymore

Then, along comes tango! Tango, a blazeborn, is of course a major safety risk inside of a mine where gas leaks and combustibles are common. they trust him well enough to be careful and not blow himself up, but they also cant send him down the usual mineshafts, so they have him working mostly near the deepest parts of the cave, away from the coal veins and closer to the lava pits that he can withstand easier, so he winds up mining alone for the most part

And they think, hey, this is perfect! Now we have someone we can send timmy with so that he’s not cooped up all day. So tango winds up spending several hours a day just exploring deep caves and talking to himself, hanging out with this weird little bird that grian and joel love to bully

Anyway, long story short, this is me indulging in my own personal love of tiny animals and basically writing about tango going “ive had timmy for one day but if anything happened to him i’d blow this place up with myself in it”. Its just dumb little fluffy stuff like jimmy and tango doing back and forth whistle calls (jimmy of course being safely tucked away in an oxygen chamber the whole time), tango absolutely decking his room out with lots of perches and things bc he noticed jimmy hates cages, and tango spending his free time walking around with a bird nestled in his hair

Mostly this is just snapshot scenes in my head, stuff like grian explaining to tango how timmy got his name and what not. But yea this has been taking over my brain for weeks now!!!! Please help me i still need to finish my other wips!!!!!!!!!!

[ftalos]

[Omen of Storms] Additional Portalcraft cards: first impressions.

The Omens are alive! They did die but they’re alive! Lorewise, I think they keep the same power level and ideals than before but execute them in a different way, and this is well presented in their new sets. I’m concerned about Marwynn and Raio’s, I wouldn’t enjoy facing them a lot in the ladder, but I’m really excited for the new Mazelbeine (Mjerrabaine) and Lishenna.

Let’s talk about Lishenna’s lore. Her trial of destruction meant to live for her, destroying everything in order to meet her and pass the trial; something that Ralmia could do easily because she’s an annihilation system. Having her trial overcame, she disappears, and then the hermits of destruction kept preaching their ideal as prayers for her return, the encore. Said prayers are answered and Lishenna comes back with a second trial, Melody, making every adherent destroy under her song. Melody is not about getting to meet her, but getting hyped and destroying more things because you met her.

Now, is the Melody set a viable gameplan? Let’s check the cards and find out.

Lishenna, Melodious Destruction: Quite the balanced card, the Destruction gameplan itself looks like it comes from Shadowcraft so having Reanimate in her Evolution fits, bring puppets back to deal with board and up your count of destroyed followers. We will probably use her fanfare to get her token spell more than the new artifacts, but the flexibility is appreciated. However, getting 10 followers destroyed before turn 6 looks quite difficult, especially with Stringmaster out of rotation, and the payoff requires more destruction, but it is something I will test nevertheless. I see it as a 3-of in the new puppet portal just because she’s pretty. 4/5.

Melody’s Return: More Shadowcraft keywords, appreciated, this might be the card that gets us to our condition before Lishenna enters the field. But it might require some highroll, her additional effect will get us not only a new Lish but also help us get Licht back in the lategame in case we had to use him early for puppets or sustain. Definitely a must. 5/5.

Adherent of Melody: I think this card is really good, double fanfare means we could get more of the new Lishenna’s Artifacts for an encore on the burn/sustain. But even without it the repeated destruction helps a lot. 4.5/5.

There we have them, I do love the Melody playstyle and would like to see more of them in the next expansion, there will be space as they don’t have to focus the whole set on developing the next story’s world. All this encore of destruction hypes me but I’m more into the gold and silver than the legendary itself; I’m pretty sure that will change tho. Stay on.

Also the lore writeup from the start made me want to write how I think every Omen chose their new trial, would somebody be interested in that?

[shenanigans-and-imagines]

Tell us about your bottled up OC lore

Everything below the cut. I’m serious when I say it’s long.

Loki x Sigyn (Logyn)

Incredibles AU:  Sigyn is a superhero and Loki is her sworn arch nemesis.  They’re flirted, fought, and occasionally teamed up to take on bigger threats. But, when an act passes forcing all superheroes to go into hiding, Loki finds it’s not fun being a villian without a hero. He finds Sigyn and the pair of them eventually fall in love, get married, and settle down with a couple of kids.  But even if Loki can’t deny the happiness his new life brings him, are part of him longs for the adventure and excitement of yesteryear.  He’s given an opportunity when a package arrives asking him for his “unique insight” on an upcoming project.  How can he resist?

Look, I just want an opportunity to write them both as parents and also have some awkward PTA meetings between him and Sigyn’s fellow hero co-workers.

Just a big ol’ Hunger Games AU that I literally forgot about until just now: Start of the revolution against President Doom lead by survivors of the Hunger Games with Steve Rogers and their new symbol. It’s just two random kids in this universe not one boy one girl.

Tony Stark: Stark is a favorite of the capitol and builds a lot of their tech.  He was taken into the games at 15. During the games he was blasted with some shrapnel and had to hide out in a cave.  There he met Yinsen and he took pity on Tony.  He helped Tony build a makeshift arch reactor to survive the games. Yinsen was killed and Tony survived by inventing weapons and blasting his way out.

Bruce Banner: Bruce is more of a hermit to the public eye, but still close friends with Tony.  He was forced into the games at 13.  Starting out as a rather timid and quiet boy he spent most of the game simply trying to stay out of everyone’s way, hiding in caves, trees and so on.  It came down to the last handful of kids and none of them were particularly motivated to kill the others since all of them had done what Bruce had done and hid.  To spice things up the game masters sprayed aggression toxin into the air.  All the kids were susceptible to it, but Bruce was the worst.  He ended up killing all the kids himself with his bare hands. Although the toxins did wear off Bruce still fears that anger inside of himself.  He suffers from PTSD and when he is angry he does become violent.

Thor Odinson: Thor is another one of the capitols darlings.  He and Loki entered the games together during an anniversary game in which if one was chosen and had a sibling that sibling must enter the game as well if they are at age. If by the end of the game both siblings are left standing, they can both live.  He was 16 at the time.  Thor relied on his strength with his preferred weapon being a large hammer. He was also one to form alliances with other members while Loki remained wary.  In the end there was Thor, Loki, and two other members of their alliance. Thor wanted to be fair and give the two other survivors a chance.  Loki took the opportunity to poison the water they stole from him and Thor in the night. Thor was at first disgusted with what his brother did, but over the years accepted that Loki did it to save both of them.  

Loki Odinson: Along with Thor he is a capitol favorite.  While Thor plays up the honorable warrior persona, Loki relies on the charming scoundrel. He entered the games with his brother at 15.  Loki relied heavily on his wits and traps to survive.  Once the alliance was broken he knew the other team would not kill him and Thor in their sleep, but they would steal some of their supplies.  Loki made sure to leave food and water in the open for them to take, all of it poisoned.  He does not regret anything he did in the games since it lead to Thor and his survival. What he hasn’t told Thor, or anyone, was that he knew that if Thor got in his way of living, he would have let Thor die.

Natasha Romanov: Game master for the reunion Hunger Games, Natasha is actually working for the rebellion as a double agent.

Clint Barton: He is one of the less praised winners; he makes less of a secret in his distaste with the capitol.  He doesn’t have any family for the capitol to threaten, so he sometimes says things he shouldn’t.  Clint entered the games when he was 14.  His brother Barney was chosen as well.  For most of the games Barney watched after Clint, both of them were skilled archers and shot at opponents from the trees.  Towards the end of the game Barney went down to get some food while Clint waited for him.  Barney was captured and tortured by some of the other kids to find out where Clint was, but he didn’t spill.  That night Clint heard a boom in the sky and he woke up to see that Barney was dead. Clint spent the rest of the games looking for the rest of the kids and killed them all.  Clint is more than ready to fight the capitol and shows it enough for people to catch on it, but not enough for the capitol to kill him.

Juliet Holden: Juliet remains out of the public eye if she can avoid it and spends as much time as she can with her family. She was forced into the games at 17 along with a girl named Beth who as 16.  They stuck together throughout the games.  Juliet used more hand to hand combat and hiding while Beth was more of an inventor.  During an attack Juliet got shocked and Beth helped her through it.  Juliet got out alright, but she lost a lot of her pain censors meaning she could take a hit longer.  Beth took inspiration and made some make shift gloves that could shock opponents to death.  Beth was eventually killed leaving Juliet the winner.  Juliet still feels survivor’s guilt about Beth since she was the smarter one between the two of them.  She hates the capitol with a burning passion, but unlike Clint has a very large family she needs to protect and care for.

Sigyn Odinson: Wife to Loki, their wedding was shown throughout the capitol making Sigyn as much as a capitol darling as Loki.  This was planned by both Loki and Thor to keep Sigyn and Jane safe.  If they were capitol favorites the capitol would be less likely to hurt either of them.  As a result she became one of the few non-winners to be invited to the capitol. She knows how to be charming and play the role of the dutiful wife.  Unfortunately with this new found confidence Thor started speaking more freely his dislike of the capitol.  President Doom knew he couldn’t hurt Thor or Loki or their wives so he turned to their children.  Jane couldn’t have kids so Loki and Sigyn’s children were forced into the games. Both boys died leaving Sigyn devastated. She no longer went to the capitol with Loki and was an adamant planner in taking down the capitol.

Poe Dameron x Lana Solo (Polo)

Modern AU: I wrote a sum up of it here

Bodhi Rook x Sera Darros

YouTuber AU: Linked Here

Coffee Shop/College AU: Linked Here

10 Things I Hate About You AU:

Jyn: Kat  

Sera: Bianca  

Bodhi: Cameron  

Cassian: Patrick  

K-2SO: Michael  

Baze: Mrs. Perkey  

Chirrut: Mr. Morgan  

Draven: Dad  

Male OC: Joey

Roadtrip AU:

Sera is going off the college and her adopted brother Cassian and his best friend Kay are helping her move across country.

Along the way they spot a woman having trouble with her car and offer her a ride to the nearest gas station to call a tow. The woman reveals herself to be Jyn Erso.  She’s going cross country to meet her father who she hadn’t seen since she was about eight. When she calls the tow they say they can’t get if fixed for a few days.  Sera then offers for her to join them on the trip since they’re going in the same direction.  Jyn agrees and they’re off.

They travel for about a day when the car breaks down and they have to get it fixed.  They go to a local mechanic where Bodhi is working.  As he fixes the car he and Sera strike up a conversation where she tells them where they’re going. Bodhi says that he’s going to the same school she is, transferring from junior college.  Sera then offers that he come with them since she wants to know someone when she gets there and it would be fun.  Cassian begrudgingly agrees since the car isn’t at it’s best and having a mechanic on hand would be helpful. 

They travel for another couple of days before eventually reaching a small camp sight.  They had been driving all day and all need some rest.  The nearest motel is miles always so they decide to camp out. Sera pulls what she can out of the car and makes up a camp using her blankets and sheets.  They all have a nice night bonding and fall asleep under the stars.

When they wake up the next morning they find that the car has been stolen and the only things they have left are what they took out of the car the night before.  Luckily, a couple, Baze and Chirrut, overheard they’re plight and offer them to ride in their RV.  Chirrut and Baze are both former priest road tripping across the country to see what they can see. 

Hawkeye Pierce x Elizabeth “Doc” O’Neil

Soulmate AU: Linked Here

[martuzzio]

I feel like grian in this au would absolutely stand silently over someone while they’re still sleeping and wait for them to wake up, bcs nothing makes bdubs scream and roll out of bed and crash to the floor like a multi-eyed unblinking entity ominously staring down on you~🍮

Grian would absolutely do this to his close friends when he’s feeling mischievous. However, I’m sure he wouldn’t do it often because to be honest, who likes to have their natural appearance be the source of someone’s genuine shock like that? This idea has inspired me so I’m going to take this opportunity to delve a little more into Grian’s mind and his species.

I can see Grian having a weird relationship with his appearance. Not in a “I hate how I look” way, but more in a “I hate how other people look at me” way. For context, we’ve already determined that Grian’s species is rare enough that the average individual will never see one in person. Now imagine this scenario: a random person sees a humanoid man turned away from them in the distance. They assume that the person is a human because that’s what most humanoid people turn out to be. Then this random person turns around and shows off a face covered in sixteen different eyeballs. That unexpected sight would probably startle someone who had already subconsciously come to a decision. It doesn’t matter if the reaction is one of fear or surprise - Grian comes to the conclusion that people react negatively when they see his face.

Now imagine how often this happens to him. He’s a member of the hermits - of course people are going to take notice of him and his friends. However, the worst part is that he’s relatively alone in this fight because his hermit family can’t relate to him. Half of the crew are humans and therefore don’t count. The other half are aliens that look so far off from humanoid that if people were to stare, it would be in curiosity, not shock. Of all of the hermits, there are two other non-humans that could potentially understand Grian’s plight - Zed and Bdubs. However, even these two can’t relate. Zed’s nonhuman traits include a broad nose and wool for hair which aren’t as flashy as eight sets of eyes. Then there’s Bdubs, who does start to look weird when he gets agitated, but he manages to keep his emotions under control when out in public and therefore passes as a completely human person most of the time. Grian is truly in his own weird league of straddling human and alien features.

In conclusion, Grian has a Thing about his face and appearance but has no one in his life he can go to that could properly relate. This most likely causes a mild amount of stress in his everyday life that eventually would build up and probably explode in some horrible way.

(Should someone write about this? Yes. Should it be me? Eh, maybe.)

Space outlaws lore can be seen here.

[tomsandal]

The one where Tom went "can I just make stuff up?" and didn't wait for an answer

a/n: incredibly terrible title brought to you by you yes you who couldn't give me better one heart

characters: červená kapota, tom sandál

warnings: teensy weensy cosmic horror/death depiction at the start (because i am a moron and a fool and forgot what genre im writing), alcohol mention

words: 1,8k

To truly start at the story’s beginning, we’ll need to go many pages back in history books.

It was millennia ago, when something very strange took place and changed the world from how it was known.

It so happened that, for some mysterious reason, a meteorite crashed down on earth and landed in a crater in some frankly unnoteworthy forest.

This incident did not go without notice of course, and not too long after it had fallen were there already parties of plenty that were eager to find out what strangeness took place the night before. Many ventured into the forest, allured by the mystery or driven by their responsibility to protect their village, but not a single one of those brave souls has ever made the journey back. And so the number of volunteers and explorers thinned over time, for the prospect of being lost to those woods without a seeming trace was enough to ward off even the bravest of the brave.

However all those who did go, did not disappear in an equal way.

Some of those who ventured started to feel effects of a mysterious force soon after the start of their journey. Those ones met their end lying down on the forest floor, feverish and plagued by visions indescribable. No man’s willpower to follow common sense and go back home could win over the pull of the compelling presence.

But some of them pulled through. The strongest and greatest of them all did get to see what their end goal was this whole time.

There in the clearing lay the mystery. Patches of brilliant blue were shining among the dark stone, twinkling not unlike the stars that hung above them.

And standing there, in this crushing magical presence, humans did what humans tend to do and moved to touch the shiny stone.

It was no easy feat, bracing against the sheer force of the meteorite this close to the source of all this madness, but some of them managed to do so.

Finally, with their goal at their literal fingertips, they laid their hands at the glittering surface. And their hands melted right off.

The lucky ones died from the immediate shock from the pain. The rest bled out among the grass, suffocating in the stone’s heavy aura.

And some of them leaned even closer... for the call had won over.

For some time has the stone been left undisturbed, lying unmoved while its surroundings changed as the years went by. No wise enough soul dared to enter the haunted forest. And so the years passed in hundreds and the celestial body had started to merge with the surrounding environment. Many years has it been since then, when it was finally fully covered and sunken deep into the ground and its power dimmed to a hum.

If you were to walk by that place at that moment, you wouldn't think there to be anything out of the ordinary. And so didn't the people that had settled there.

Who might know why they chose this secluded woodland place for their settlement but they did and surprisingly prospered without any casualties.

The stone's powers have dulled over the centuries but they were still there nonetheless, even if only in a shadow of its former self, and the construction and disturbance of the ground was bound to wake it up.

And so the energy started seeping out, warping the unaware residence in the process. With each generation grew the changes more profound, until the place was almost unrecognizable. Plants grew wild and high, displaying colours very uncommon to vegetation anywhere, the roaming animals wouldn't be recognized even by the highest of scholars, trees grew twisted with leaves of gold and humans were born with features never seen before. Their hair was bright and shining in arrays of blues, purples and greens, just like the lights in the sky that could be seen from time to time. But since no negative effect seemed to take place, this magical village of star-touched people lived in-

“Star-touched...really.”

“Yes and no interruptions please.”

-lived in peace. But time was not kind to them.

The year was 1610, the witchcraft craze was at its peak and it didn’t take long until the hunt was brought to them as well. Their clearly otherworldly appearance couldn't be excused and many fell on the trials, under the hands of men driven by fear and hatred. The rest left their homeland, which ended promptly burned to the ground. From then on, they lived as hermits far, far from the human eye.

They lay in hiding for long, until their time has finally come, when people started walking among themselves with wild bright coloured hair and-

“wait, wait what about the magical wolves”

“That is tied to my own personal upbringing and no, was not in fact universal for everyone, stop messing up the timeline”

“oh I am messing up the timeline and not you making something different every ti-”

“As i was saying-” “and when do the glow squids come in” “My glow squid ancestry is clearly the reason for my eyes not the hair ”

“yes, of course, the eyes that are obviously not coloured contacts”

“Keep that tone to yourself and shush.”

///

It was a pleasant summer night, the air was crisp and the streets were quiet. And there, in a certain bar, sat two peculiar people.

Kapota sighed and let her friend-but not friend-associate from work-but not wanting to kill each other right now-buddy ramble on as she took a sip from her glass. She had ordered something called the Hanky Panky Cocktail Supreme and deemed it as decent enough, if a bit overpriced for a glorified gin and fernet.

Still, she would rather be holding a pint of good old fashioned beer, but finding a place around these parts with a half decent beer is near impossible. She will not be drinking that dishwater no thank you.

Good thing that she’s a skilled fancy drinker. A life skill which she picked up from her business bar outings, such as now, which maybe wasn't actually the most objective of examples since most of those were with Tom.

Not that the aforementioned was any help in the drink picking department, that maniac of a man just sashays to the bar and orders a literal colour and when no further explanation is given the bemused barkeep has to pick themselves from their array of colourful drinks.

Seems that they picked well today, because the current “pink” already sat empty before Tom.

She continued to mull over this and that, all the while enjoying the bar’s comfortable atmosphere, when something caught her attention.

“wait wait roll that back”

“Why, could it be that you weren’t paying attention?”

“Yes I was, but what were you saying about pointed ears?”

“Oh, just that the star-touched had pointy ears alongside the wild hair.”

“well, please do pray tell me Sandál dearest how could it be that your ears are rounded”

“As I said, a long time ago in the times most desperate, riddled with fear, pain and terror, food was scarce and from the terrible hunger they gnawed on their ears until they were completely rounded and from then on this feature was lost to them.”

“ok see now i know you're just making fun of me because thats just from that dumb movie you like”

“should have been listening.

Honestly why do i even bother, I am so generously sharing the long lost history of my kind and yet this audience is so ungrateful”

“noo i like your lore, don’t worry it's much more entertaining than ‘I went to the aisle 12 in Kaufland and picked the gaudiest shade of purple they had’”

Tom just grumbled to that and moved to take a demonstrative swig of his drink, but then he realized he didn't have any left anymore so he instead picked up the little paper umbrella and pointed it accusatively at Kapota.

“Never, have I been more disrespected, as I am right now.” He complained, while accentuating every word with a swish of the tiny umbrella.

“It's nothing personal pal, but you can’t exactly expect people to believe you with a name like yours.”

“Oh that's rich coming from you!”

“I'll let you know that the Kapota name is very ancient and regal, thank you very much. Passed down only by the generations of the clan McKap”

“Absolutely not.”

“It’s true look it up”

“Not happening, if i did that you would just laugh at me that i fell for it.”

“Well in that case I guess you’ll never know”

“oh shut up!”

“you shut up!”

…

It was a pleasant summer night, the air was crisp and the streets were quiet. And there, in a certain bar, bickered two peculiar people.

///

All in all Tom would consider this a successful night. He left the bar on his own two feet, had all his belongings still with him, including both of his important trademark sandals still on, and head somewhat clear.

About ten minutes back, they had been politely ushered out of the bar, because it was apparently closing. The shiny sign with the numbers 24 and 7 would beg to differ but sure.

Yeah, ‘always open’ my arse, people can't even trust bars these days.

He wasn’t really upset though, couldn’t blame the poor bloke either, because anyone who had to listen to their nonsense for the past -who knows how long- had all the right to kick them out. It didn’t matter anyway, tonight really was quite nice.

So now they were just lounging together on the sidewalk, enjoying the chilly air.

A lone car sped by somewhere in the distance.

Tom gently thunked his head on the wall behind him and let out a content sigh, next to him Kapota finally broke the silence.

“So...who’s the designated driver, hahh”

A good question indeed, since neither of them even closely qualify to anything akin to sober. Not that it would have changed much, given the fact that Tom does not in fact have a driving licence anyway. His most beloved, bless their heart, is incredibly awesome and does have one of those and drives him around in times of need. This would seem like a time of need and it wouldn't even be the first time Kap would hitch a ride with them, but this hour, other than time of need, is also time commonly known as ‘very late’.

“I guess I can try to give Tobi a call, but I dunno it's pretty late...”

“Nah, let ‘em sleep”

“So whats the battle plan Kaptn’? ”

“Where's the uhhh friggin closest bus stop.”

“Few damn blocks away at least that's for sure”

“Awesome... lets go its field trip time”

And so they went onto the grand adventure of getting safely home.

Some would deem it highly unwise to blunder around dark alleyways in the middle of the night, but honestly, unfortunate are those street rats who shall foolheartedly decide to pick those two fools as their next victims.