#wow i really just said all that

[clocks-are-round]

sometimes my taste in media blows me away a little

like, i love red vs fucking blue when in personality i am a socially anxious introvert who probably is too optimistic and people-pleasing about stuff and is scared of being disliked and cries over fictional media lol

ok, i like to think i have a little more backbone than the above but like. idk i just found it kind of funny. like i know there’s all types (of queers)— jkjk but like we are a high demographic relatively speaking— in this fandom but i dunno. i like shows about chaotic assholes i guess lol

i’m debating whether to even post this since it is clearly written out of sleepy rambles but like. yeah sure why the fuck not

dan vs and sao abridged and that sci fi one i’m forgetting the name of with the cynical genius and her himno best friend also fall into the same chaotic assholes category lol

yeah imma sleep now. i hope y’all are doing goodddd

[rendevok]

Moon dance 🌕✨

[astrobolical]

Okay.

As much as I love feral Satan, who lets his instincts run wild and growls, bites and everything else… his soft side is so fuckin’ cute.

The Satan that stares at you in confusion as you tend to a small cut on his hand he’d received on one of his rampages, unbothered by the mess around the two of you and concerned solely with him. How he doesn’t quite know why his chest feels so warm and tight as he looks at your gentle, concerned expression.

Satan, who doesn’t understand why he feels so weightless with you, why his heart flutters and why he wants to hold you so gently, as if cradling something precious.

Satan, whose anger fades just from your presence alone, overtaken with feelings he’s never experienced, that baffle him entirely but he can’t get enough.

Satan, who desperately throws himself into research just to understand you a little more, to put a name on how he feels about you— who’s just as afraid of his own feelings as he is elated by them.

Satan, who worries you’ll be frightened of him if his temper rises, but you never are, even when he tells you that you should be.

Satan, who lays beside you, watching your sleeping face and utterly baffled that you trust him so completely to allow him to see you in such a vulnerable state… who knows deep down he’ll protect you forever.

Satan, who fumbles each time he tries to explain any of this to you, whose face becomes adorably reddened with each failed attempt.

Satan, who realizes that you’ve accepted him entirely, his every fault, his everything, before he had even come close to accepting himself. Who loves you more than he could ever put to words, or that he could ever really comprehend.

Just him. You know? Ahh, just helping him come to terms with everything he doesn’t know, to grow and understand. Helping him, in the end, to love.

[egophiliac]

still absolutely losing my mind over Lilia

[theloveinc]

OlderDad!Bakugou who gets a haircut and his baby doesn't recognize him and he doesn't want his dad to pick him up 😭😭😭😭😭😭

Bakugou has a cry in the bathroom and you have to spend the rest of the night consoling him.

Also Hiiiiiii, miss u, hope youre gooooood

head in my hands bc of this, just thought abt bakugo growing out his hair a little bit right after baby's birth...takes him months to go and get a real haircut cuz he doesn't wanna burden you more than he already has and by the time he's okay with the thought (but only for "AN HOUR MAX," is what he says), he has a mullet thing going on and all this scruff on his chin🥺🥺🥺

so he gets home with his regular ol' haircut, maybe a little shorter just to account for ... not wanting to go again so soon, and baby's HOLLERING bloody murder as soon as they see him and refusing to be taken out of your arms, doing that thing where they're flipping their face back and forth to dodge a kiss...

it's so tragic bc not even a little cheek nuzzling helps to calm them bc bakugo's CLEAN SHAVEN and smells like aftershave instead of like dad when he tries!!!!!!

and after, you watch him kinda sulk into the bathroom, thinking like aw yeah thats a bummer but also pretty funny, too (esp bc the haircut does look good🫣🤓), AND HE DOESN'T COME OUT FOR LIKE an hour???

....until you finally have to ask him if he's okay in there and you're opening the door to him sitting on the toilet seat, arms crossed and red cheeks a little streaky with tears...

LJFKASDJFADSJK it's the cutest, most sad sight you ever did see!! ofc Bakugo tries to deny it, but the way he tears up again (after you're done assuring him he did nothing wrong) when his baby finally realizes it's him and smiles (and then how he refuses to give them up again until bedtime) has his ass. EXPOSED.

(i love and miss u more than air, earth, water, dirt + HOPE YOU'RE GOOD TOO BESTIE ILY)

[nabhx]

got captured again 🙄🙄 these guys r lame fr

[fairyroses]

He was about to kill you, Lex. Or divulge something you didn't want me to know.

— SMALLVILLE, "Forever" (4.21)

+ bonus from "Arctic" (7.20):

[skitskatdacat63]

"it was good fun! Surprisingly competitive I would say!"

[sskk-manifesto]

Bungou Stray Dogs: Dead Apple and how “ability users” (opposite to “normal people”) learning to accept themselves through the acceptance of their own abilities is a queer metaphor of acceptance of own's sexual orientation and gender: an essay by me

[mintjeru]

it probably wasn't the smartest decision to start an ongoing 1000+ chapter webnovel when i know it'll consume my every waking thought but here we are

open for better quality | no reposts

[sciderman]

I swear I have read your big post regarding Peter Parker's neurodivergence and why it is best to avoid labelling him, but he definitely has a weird brain

Can't find it and feel kinda sad about it cuz I deeply related to it

i know exactly which post you're talking about and i can't find it either! i've raked through my archive, and it's just - nowhere to be seen. i think tumblr eated it (it happens.)

really, tumblr's search functionality is so so useless, i don't know what to tell you. there are plenty of keywords i can search to find it that post, but the search functionality actually just does not work!

undiagnosed audhd-addled peter parker, my darling, my light, my life, my everything.

i think peter parker's such an interesting creature to write, because a lot of people will point to a certain behaviour about him and say "this is an autistic thing, right?" but a lot of those behaviours are actually, in my head, tied to certain traumas in peter's life too.

people say "oh, the food thing, peter's a picky eater because he's autistic" and yes, absolutely. but also it's tied to his trauma with his parents.

peter gets overstimulated, and yes, it's an autism thing, but also he was bitten by a radioactive spider and his senses are dialled to 11.

it's a similar case i've found for myself, too – where a lot of friends i have kind of diagnose me because i have autistic traits, but actually - i'm hesitant to claim the label or pursue diagnosis because, actually, i know where these certain behaviours come from, and they come from certain traumas. there are events i can pinpoint in my life and say "yep. that's where this behaviour comes from."

so - i think there's a lot of overlap between trauma and autistic traits. the brain is very complex! i think the reason for that overlap is maybe as simple as the fact that people with autism and people with trauma are both doing the same thing - developing behaviours to protect themselves or soothe themselves. so - i think it's nice to be able to see a character like peter parker, who may or may not be autistic, but recognise behaviours in him and see yourself in him.

people who go undiagnosed for whatever reason - people who are really good at masking - so good, in fact, that they have no idea they might be on the spectrum - everyone and anyone at all can look at peter parker and recognise themselves. because i think we discredit the thought that every single brain does the same thing! develops certain behaviours in order to survive. every brain has that same software - we've just all been faced with different hardships that we need to overcome, and that's were all the differences come in.

autism is a spectrum, i guess - everyone falls into it to some degree. and i think events in your life probably push you along on it. but i don't know, i didn't study brain science. probably what i'm saying is very stupid and uninformed. of course there's brain chemistry involved. but i know people in my life living with autism and certain events in their life have exacerbated certain behaviours or made coping with it a lot more difficult. so maybe trauma is a catalyst.

[mbat]

i literally read the book of bill days ago but its only now kinda hitting me how fucked ford and bills whole thing was though cause ford literally talks about being so unable to sleep (to try to keep bill away), and when sleep inevitably caught up to him, he would wake up to his body abused and things messed with and he just couldnt seem to find an escape (and he literally didnt get to truly escape until 30 years later)

(also keeping people awake for unhealthily long periods of time is another tactic used to mess with and control people because of how it impairs brain function)

listing off the things we see in those few pages in the book of bill:

i mean, punching and scratching at a steel door for hours would be so damaging to your hands and probably hurt like hell for at least 2 days after. then bill says he was hitting fords head against a wall, though its said in a post-it as if its a joke, but he also isnt exactly above doing that, and honestly he says most things like its a joke.

i also dont need to say 'bill really doesnt know how to take no for an answer' because he makes that very clear in literally any interaction we see with him.

bill literally puts a venomous snake near ford while fords asleep, which could have killed him if he wasnt lucky+skilled enough to deal with it.

he nearly gives ford hypothermia, and in the same action actively threatens ford with the idea of making him jump off of a high spot, and like ford says, doesnt do it just so he can send a message to ford about how hes the one in control.

he gets ford in trouble with not only the law, but also with other people that are probably not very happy with him after. he mutilates fords body in several ways, and i dont think i need to go into detail on them because theyre... so ew. and he even exposes part of fords body to the world. like, its just taking his shirt off, but thats still showing off his body in a way that he didnt agree to or want

and then he attempts to (or purposefully fails to) call stan, using fords voice to threaten suicide and tell stan that ford never loved him.

and he punctuates it with a final power move, in a hallucination that he creates, hes messing with stans memories and making him feel like his body was basically about to implode

and like. okay, we all joke about toxic old man yaoi, and its a good joke and toxic old man yaoi is great and its an interesting ship, but holy fuck.

like. to say the absolute least, that had to be so, so deeply violating. its no wonder that when we see ford in the past, when he finally contacts stan, he looks like hes on the verge of shattering into a million pieces. he just went through, and still wasnt yet out of, some deeply abusive shit.

like... everything coming out lately both in this book and what ive heard is on the website, mixed with what we already knew from the show itself... the stans are both so, so fucking tragic dude. their whole lives were thrown away over things that really didnt even need to be the way they were, and then they both get into situations that are pretty damn screwed, and those situations follow them for the rest of their lives. its basically a miracle that things worked out in the end for them.

i dont really have a point, i just had to talk about all that. i read almost all of the book of bill in one sitting, and while i was really enjoying it, i was also getting kind of tired of sitting in one spot only doing this one thing for several hours straight. i still felt a lot of the emotional bits of it of course, but man this part specifically just really didnt hit me until now.

i mean, to say the absolute least, i know what its like to feel violated in a similar way, though not anywhere near to the extent of what he went through at all. someone get that man some therapy got damn

[redactedcrowart]

mystomach hurts. alt version under the cut thumbsup emoji

[littlebittyhollowbugs]

Hornet headcanon!

'Hornet' is not Hornet's true name.

I'm still torn between different reasonings for her having the name either

A- It was given to her as an honorary title, by Queen Vespa, during her training within the hive (or bestowed upon her after having finished her training as a symbol of her accomplishments.)

Or B- She gave the name to herself, after the fall of the kingdom, as a way to separate her current self from her past while still honoring some part of her past. (The part that is easiest for her to look back on.)

As for her birth name my sisters and I have decided on Arachnè. (The name is from a Greek myth, where the protagonist Arachnè challenges Athena to a weaving contest, wins, and is afterwards transformed into a spider.)

[zebratimw]

I still love you (Song: Still in Love with You by Deeps)

[lunarblazes]

while i’m xmen posting i do have to mention that post-secret wars 2 arcs of xmen are absolutely insane. they’re really dark, with tons of character darkest hours and breakdowns, and specifically the way they explore kurt’s insecurities and character flaws are just so incredible?

like first he pushes amanda away because he’s having a crisis of faith in everything he believes and he can’t believe she would want to be with him for real, without manipulating him or any kind of ulterior motive. he nearly gets lost in murderworld trying to chase a heroic fantasy, because everything is so much simpler in a fairy tale, while amanda has to deal with the fallout of his callous words. when his team returns from san francisco, he’s forced to be serious again, and he immediately overcompensates, trying to be as daring and bold as he once was, to the point of recklessness—he tries to teleport nimrod, against storm’s advice and all the information they know about nimrod being able to learn from prior attacks, and loses his teleportation for a few days, is chased by a mob, and has to be tracked down and rescued by kitty and piotr.

then, while he’s still incredibly weak from that, to the point of fainting on logan when he teleports to say hi, he chooses to go on the x-men’s mission to rescue the morlocks from hunters that have been ravaging their tunnels. he intentionally overtaxes himself to get rid of one of the hunters, who has been incapacitating the rest of the team, and gets critically wounded by riptide due to his overtaxation and strain on already present wounds he sustained due to his recklessness.

kurt is unable to stop playing the hero. when he doubts his role in the x-men, he becomes reckless and self-destructive, falling back on his idealized vision of a heroic individual, the movies he watched as a child. because it’s so much easier to just get hurt making sure nobody else is—because then, you never have to think about all the hurt you’re causing others. he was raised as a performer, so it’s no wonder he immediately reverts to bravado when he’s cornered. none of the wounds he took were his teammates’ faults—in fact, ororo and logan explicitly told him to stop pushing himself so he could heal—and they didn’t need to do it (at least, not the first one, which would have made the second injury a nonissue). and he’s the x-men’s field medic with banshee in retirement. his self-sacrificing joyride actively puts the others in danger—nobody else thinks to check piotr for wounds after the morlock fight and it nearly kills him when he shifts from his metal form. i just think about him. like a lot. it’s really a wonderful execution of a common character flaw that gets overlooked—because selflessness is good, right?

not when people rely on you. not when it’s destructive.

this flaw is also partially why he’s not a good leader of the x-men—but i could write a whole different post on that so i’ll leave it here for now. i will explode. thanks