#wow I think everyone has a good time haha
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ssreeder · 6 months ago
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Ollo! I was tagged by @transboysokka to post my last line written! thank you!
I am in the midst of editing the last part of the next chapter of ITF, so this is just randomly in there somewhere but it was the last line I tinkered with:
Jee found it endearing how he felt the need to share his joy with Zuko, and Jee was astounded by how patient and docile Zuko was with the other boy.
(as you can probably tell we have successfully made it to the market, and Sokka is happy)
I don’t know who to tag so… @erisenyo (i know youve been tagged but I know youve got more lines to share lol) @witchering10123 @y-s-t-v @somethingfoamy & reverse tag @transboysokka your turn, & anyone else who wants to play!
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isaacathom · 3 months ago
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bad alternate timeline is going well in that my character, a perennial wuss, realised that another pc has kidnapped her aunt and threatened her cousin and immediately went 'oh im gonna fucking kill him'
#naielle odelia is going to fucking murder morgaan vandervest#and if youve kept even the faintest track of the lore in this campaign you know thats WILD#like a) vandervest should be dead and b) naielle deeply respects him?#in the prime timeline the situation was very complicated but naielle felt a strong responsibility towards her boss#and felt compelled to repay what she saw as unfounded trust in her. shes tried to be the captain she thinks he thought she could be#she doesnt know that isnt remotely what he had in mind and in fact her character growth from that undermined his plan#which was to have a captain who would be loyal and manipulatable#but she thought he had faith in her to rise to the challenge of command. and she did. and that made her harder to maneouver#because now she has the confidence to tell him his decisions are shit. and doesnt move around the board the same#but she still is 'loyal'. she chose to keep trusting him where she felt she could. she thinks he was a good commander#meanwhile in the dark timeline the first time they met he was coming to seize her aunts estate#and now hes kidnapped her aunt and briefly held her cousin hostage and naielles like oh im gonna kill him#she'll do it crying. not because she caresabout him but because shes scared#and i know that the moment he dies naielle will actually remember who he is. who he was to her#and shes going to have a very bad time#the dread timeline has been bad for everyone but at absolutely no point has naielle had a good time#like its been probably the worst 48hrs of her life i think she can say that confidently now#like before it was like 'this sucks but is it worse than exile' and once she got home and found out about her aunt#its like yeah no we've got the no1 spot locked in. worst time i have ever had. wow!#theres so many other things making naielles like miserable in there but atp the tags are overloaded haha
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toytulini · 5 months ago
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jalapeño eggggggggggg
#toy txt post#its Jalapeño Egg time again!!!!!!!#and afternoon coffee#would love to get to a point. in my mental health. spoon distribution. executive function and time management that i could#hold a job and still have jalapeño egg and coffee everyday. maybe have a couple chickens or smth#ive gotten it to be fairly medium spoons on. a good day. or like high spoons medium high reward#the spoon to payoff ratio seems achievable to Balance#compliments the coffee well#if youre curious its Very Basic egg bc i am a Simple Man i and i dont like fancy shit with lots of ingredience generally.#not like on principle just like. statistically speaking.#pan with butter. 2-3 eggs bc that seems like a Normal and Reasonable Amount to allow myself to eat while leaving enough eggs for Future Me#as well. the butter i use is salted. if that matters. u can prolly get away with like olive oil or dairy substitute or somethin idk.#i can tolerate lactose and i like it with the butter. be generous w the butter. stir the eggs up in a little mug or smth like scrample em.#break the yolks and mix em in. cook eggs to your desired egg cookedness. put on plate#put sliced jalapeño pickles on top to desired amount#voila#jalapeño egg. you can alter this as you want. go crazy mix in all sorts of shit put the jalapeños in while youre cooking it cheese whatever#idc. i dont like all that stuff in mine and i prefer it w the jalapeños added after its done cooking personally. pairs well with#black coffee. good black cofffee. like pickle n coffee but elevated. think it takes me like maybe 30 min to do both egg and coffee and#clean up/set aside to clean up later. BUT thats also including the fact that im making coffee in a fancy lil stupid pour over and gotta#babysit it to make sure it hits all those grounds evenly. and watch the bubbles. could deffo do it faster if u have a faster way to make/#have the coffee haha#learning to cook food at all has been learning that i was right as a child when i realized i dont like fancy/complicated ass foods#again not necessarily on principle just like. everytime i see some recipe or gourmet shit or fucking food network im like#wow thats uh. Pretty. that sure looks like it takes a Lot Of Skill And Work! good job!#personally i wouldve stopped like about 5 ingredients and 400 steps ago and not just cos im lazy as shit. that part is bonus#anyway ☆this is not a moral judgement of fancy ass foods. i simply tend not to like them and my Annoyed Tone is purely from#going to some silly little event and they never got basic ass boring fucking plain god damn brownies anymore. everyones gotta get fancy and#Do Shit to em and leave me No Options. smh. its Fine Youre Fine To Like The Fancy Desserts and Many Ingredient Dishes#its Fine! youre Fine! to eat and like fancy desserts and shit. i am simply a Picky Bitch Eater Grumbling In The Corner. let me liiiive
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norrisainz33 · 20 days ago
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bubble || LN4
☆ summary: internet sleuths find out that lando norris has been flirting with and potentially dating a relatively unknown singer
☆ pairing: lando norris x singer!reader
☆ fc & warnings: zinadelphia & slightly suggestive. you are responsible for the content you consume
☆ requested: nope!
゚. ✿ ୨❤︎୧⠀✿ . ゚
f1gossip has made a post
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f1gossip: it’s been brought to our attention by an anonymous user that our lando norris has been caught seemingly flirting in the comment sections (for at least the past 24 weeks based off the time stamps) with a small american artist, y/n y/l/n. he’s the only driver that follows her and has been consistently in her comment section hyping her up and calling her things like “gorgeous”, “talented” and “pretty.” what do you all make of this?
view all 653 comments
user1: oh my god lando????
user14: i’ve never once heard of this girl?
user2: how did we not know about this for the past 24 weeks guys wtf
user4: no like seriously…. seems like something we should have known already
user3: wait her music is really good tho 🥹
user7: her song mirrorball??? the girl has some vocals wow
user4: just looked her up and she’s beautiful… i see what he’s seeing
yourbff: screaming my head off at this
user1: and who are you??? do you know y/n??
f1gossip: check your dms yourbff
user5: she’s using him for fame!
user4: considering we all just found out about her…. imma go ahead and say no she’s not
user6: now how do i make this about me 🙂‍↔️
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ynuser has added to their story
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user1: ooooo orange or papaya ???
yourbff: girl you fueling the flames with this post 😂💀
ynuser: HAHA i know… i got 24k new followers in the past 2 days since you sent me that post by f1gossip and figured id have some fun with it since there’s no hiding now
yourbff: who knew meeting that guy randomly in europe 6 months ago was going to turn out like this
ynuser: certainly not me girl. remember when i thought he was some weirdo who was just trying to hit on me in the bar??
yourbff: bc he had no rizz but max and p really swooped in and saved him and now look at you 🥹
ynuser: my perfect little no rizz baby boy 🥹 love of my life 🤭
landonorris: it’s papaya baby
ynuser: i couldn’t be too obvious now could i?
landonorris: nah go on then be obvious
ynuser: oh you want me to post you?
landonorris: yeah specifically that one pic you took of us in the mirror last night
ynuser: LANDO that is for OUR eyes only
landonorris: right yes
landonorris: i still think you should post me
ynuser: i don’t know if i want to burst our little bubble yet
landonorris: fair enough baby. you just tell me when! i’ve got paddock passes, pictures, plane tickets — everything lined up for when you’re ready
ynuser: 🥹😭 vegas? we go on our little vacation after im done my tour and you’re done in brazil and then pop the bubble?
landonorris: sounds great to me gorgeous but seriously no pressure
user2: my delusions are working over time
maxfewtrell: i’m trying so hard to defend your privacy and this is what you post
ynuser: what’s wrong with the color orange?
maxfewtrell: y/n
user3: ain’t ever seen you and lando in the same room but i somehow know yall doing it
user4: you’re so pretty and your outfits eat so hard wtf 😭
user9: praying this is a new song lyric idk who these new fans are talking about lando this lando that …. i need a new song
ynuser has made a post
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ynuser: baby’s first headlining tour was a success! thank you to everyone who came out and sang along with me every night. i love you all dearly 🤍 and for all the newbies here, welcome 🫶🏻
view all 324 comments
user1: oh she’s so cute
user2: starting a y/n fan club rn yall
yourbff: you are making those dreams come true bb girl
ynuser: trying to 🥹
yoursibling: cutie patootie i love you
ynuser: i love you more
user23: the peoples most beautiful princess 🤍
user9: who are all you new people here
user2: lando norris fans. who are you?
user9: a y/n y/l/n fan. who is lando norris?
user2: a formula 1 driver!
user9: race cars?? i did not expect that…
user8: taking note of lando and max in the likes
user4: also taking note of their lack of a comment…. lando has commented on every single one of her posts before the f1gossip post dropped
user16: i was there last night!!! best show ever!!! love you y/n
user19: i’m obsessed with those cherry earrings
landonorris has made a post
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landonorris: a much needed break. vegas here we come baby
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user1: i don’t know where to look ,, at the wh*re in the first pic or the soft launch in the second my god 😮‍💨😍😭😔💀
user9: ok user2… i get it now. also i’ve seen those white shoes in y/n’s posts before it’s def her
user2: omg you’re an icon for this
ynuser: dmn y’all really can identify me by my shoes?
user9: YN WHAT ARE YOU SOING HERE IM SORRY
user2: y/nlando confirmed
maxfewtrell: interesting choice of photos mate
landonorris: thanks! picked them myself
maxfewtrell: yeah clearly
pietra.pilao: 🤍
landonorris: 🧡
user2: i’m speechless
user55: hey lando idk if u heard but there’s a lookalike contest happening in my room tonight. $59 cash prize
oscarpiastri: those aren’t max’s legs 👀
landonorris: you’d be correct
user12: this is monumental
user18: my favorite sinister, evil and orange little gremlin
user14: you’re gonna cook in vegas king
ynuser had posted to her story
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yourbff: this dress is eating in a way i didn’t think it would. i’m sorry for doubting you
ynuser: never doubt me 😤
lilyzneimer: had so much fun meeting you at dinner this evening!!! looking forward to spending the weekend with you at mclaren 🫶🏻
ynuser: omg it was so fun getting dinner with you and oscar!! i’m so so so glad to have you as a buddy in the paddock. i was super nervous about it all
lilyzneimer: it can be very overwhelming at times but we’ve got you y/n!!
ynuser: that means so much to me 🥹
user9: mother is mothering … in vegas?????
user12: are you in vegas per chance?! for the formula 1 grand prix?! for lando norris?!
user2: i fr need style tips and grwm’s from you y/n. every time you post an outfit it moves me
landonorris: in my hotel room 😈
ynuser: you got it ☝🏻 now hurry up and get back here
landonorris: trust me im hurrying
user8: i need someone to get you on a magazine cover stat
f1gossip has made a post
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f1gossip: confirmed! y/n y/l/n, singer songwriter, is in las vegas with lando norris for the las vegas gp. this seems to be their first official weekend out together
view all 327 comments
user2: as someone who has been deeply invested since the beginning (3 weeks ago).. this is everything
user9: my girl 🥹
user10: i truly wonder how in the world they even met… they’re such an interesting pair
user18: mclaren admin please ask him this weekend
user13: that should be me 😭
user24: ok wait guys im at the gp and y/n was walking through the paddock with lily and we waved her down because we had made some lando merch and she was honestly so sweet and stopped and took photos with us and chatted for way longer than she needed to. i truly hope she never changes she’s an angel
user21: this is so wholesome
user23: i fear she’s on track to become the people’s paddock princess in record time
user18: i have no one to send this to who will get it
mclaren has made a post
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liked by landonorris, ynuser, maxfewtrell, oscarpiastri, yourbff, and 432,444 others
mclaren: this weekends most requested interview just dropped! make sure to check out the full thing over on the mclaren app 🟠
view all 329 comments
user18: mclaren admin is a y/nlando girly confirmed
maxfewtrell: he’s leaving out the bit where i had to save him from completely bombing
landonorris: 😔 you’re not gonna let me live that down huh
ynuser: idk what would have happened if max didn’t come over and stop you from explaining why you hate fish so passionately
landonorris: babe please not on the public instagram
user2: lando norizz strikes again
landonorris: love when i get asked good questions like this!
user4: king said if one more person asks me abt wdc im gonna lose it. ask me abt y/n instead
user9: this is making it incredibly hard to gatekeep y/n
ynuser: that’s my man 🙂‍↔️
landonorris: damn right it is
user13: the mutual do you know who i am is lowkey so funny
landonorris has made a post
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landonorris: thanks for being nice to me this time vegas!! oh and thanks for coming y/n 😈🏆
view all 854 comments
user12: i’m so proud of you lando
user9: wahooooo first race i watched and you won. i think me and y/n are good luck for you
mclaren: incredible drive lando! that’s our winner!!
ynuser: something about seeing you on that podium 😮‍💨
landonorris: oh you like that?
ynuser: yes 🤭
landonorris: alright podium finishes only from now on 😏
user19: oh you two are freaks i just know it
ln4: LFGGGGG
user13: congrats on the win and the hot gf 😭
carlossainz55: congrats lando!! and hi y/n!
ynuser: hi carlos 🤍
maxfewtrell: much better post mate
landonorris: why thank you. i worked hard on this one
user2: a win and a hard launch = double win for me
゚. ✿ ୨❤︎୧⠀✿ . ゚
a/n: thanks for reading!! likes and reblogs appreciated 🫶🏻
゚. ✿ ୨❤︎୧⠀✿ . ゚
disclaimer: pictures are not mine and everything i write is fiction
© norrisainz33 || please do not rewrite, translate, or copy any of my works posted here on to any other platform
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ilydeku · 3 months ago
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teacher izuku has a girlfriend??
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Regardless of the joy and spur he expelled towards the students, Izuku knew how to maintain the steady hand of keeping the class under set composure. Nothing but the intent to teach and the will to learn, an equitable relationship between the two—and it was no question. Being the most loved and favored teacher had its perks, and grandiose respect was one of them.
But no matter how mature a student has grown, having fun will always reign somewhere along their focal point. Even if that fun means encouraging their teacher in his love life.
"...-because a good relationship between your teammates makes for optimal communication, conduct, and cooperation," explained Izuku, pointing from one spot on the board to another, well immersed in his lesson. "Now, considering quirk-"
"Speaking of relationships, are you in a relationship, sir?" A student, a frivolous girl, teasingly pipes in sudden interest. Plenty of students amongst the grade claimed a crush on Deku-sensei. Of course they did: he's sweet, very tentative and understanding to all his students individually, and takes his time to really help and engrave the knowledge he possessed for them to become the best future heroes they could be. That, and mostly his physical charms. So wouldn't it be in his best interest to have a girlfriend?
Little did Izuku know that this inquiry marked the beginning of his first uncontrollable havoc.
For a moment, he hesitated, pausing midway on the convoluted diagrams drawn on the whiteboard. A strange question, but he thought nothing much of it. He turned around and crossed his arms, lazily pointing the expo marker to the girl.
"I'm gonna pretend I didn't hear that. Unrelevant, didn't see a hand raised-"
"Aw, but sir!" She draws out, slumping back in her seat. "Are you?"
Some students began to look at each other and exchange a few grins until the room began to slowly increase in volume and erupt into unintelligible chatter.
"Ahem."
The room fell into silence accordingly, but he could clearly read the expression on everyone's faces. The class was still waiting for his answer, the way they stared and leaned over their desks in anticipation. Izuku sighs and turns back to the board.
"...no, I'm not in a relationship. Moving on, the information I've drawn-"
"Really?" The girl cuts in matter of factly with a tilt of her head. "But aren't you and y/n talking??"
A chorus of engrossed 'oohs' echoed across the room and a very subtle, but defined shade of pink dusted his cheeks at the mention of you. He turned around again and attempted to regain composure of the class.
"Everyone settle down-"
"Y/n L/n? Isn't that (hero name)?? I think she's in the top 20's now."
"Yeah! I've seen her drop by the school a couple times during lunch!"
"Now that I think about it, Deku-sensei does have her come in as a guest speaker a lot..."
It was just one after another, the addition of suspicions and theories now bringing the truth to the surface. Izuku swallowed.
A loose black band around Izuku's wrist caught another student's eye and they stood up and pointed in excitement. "Look!! Deku-sensei has hair ties on his wrist!! Hair ties!!"
"Kids, please...-"
"Wow..I've never seen your class this rowdy before, Izuku!!" That voice. His head snapped toward you in surprised, totally flustered about the situation. The entire class went dead silent and turned to you, standing at the entrance of the classroom. You wave at his kids with a smile and stroll over to Izuku's desk, dropping off a bag of some sort. He watches you endearingly.
"You forgot your lunch at home, silly."
"O-Oh did I? Haha, sorry y/n. Thank you. You're on break right now, right?"
The students watched you both like a show, taking in the interaction, the body language, the words. There's no doubt you two were a thing right? Deku-sensei and (hero name)!!
And just then, you confirmed it with simple kiss on his cheek.
"Bye, Izuku! Be nice to the kids, hm?"
"You know I always am!!"
As soon as the classroom door clicked, the class burst into awe.
"WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL US???"
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skzms · 7 months ago
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📹 .˳⁺୨୧ part 2 - everyone else camboy!felix x chan camgirl!reader x changbin camboy!jisung x camboy!minho
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summary: miscellaneous posts and a changbin x reader love story from the same universe - or lix's friends <3
word count: 2.2k words
author's note: have some more fun posts and story of the other characters aksjhdkjh idk this is v random but I hope you enjoy
warnings: non!idol au; exhibitionism & voyeurism; camming; mxm content; somewhat implied sexual poly!skz; implied romantic chan x felix, jisung x minho, reader x changbin
<< 📹 .˳⁺୨୧ part 1
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Your phone buzzes once, twice, three times, while you're waiting for your take-out to arrive. You expect Felix asking you to hang out tomorrow, maybe even Hyunjin, requesting emergency outfit help for another one of his ill-fated dates. But's neither of them. It's an unknown number. Leaving five messages. Your phone buzzes again. Six messages?!
from: xxx-xxx-xxxx hi! it's changbin, chan's friend the one he, hopefully, told you he would give your number to haha otherwise this will be very awkward ... I'll shut up now
You can't help but giggle.
You reach for the remote, click down the volume of the TV until it's only a steady hum in the background.
Chan told you about Changbin a few weeks ago, a few hours into dinner the first night Felix finally introduced you two. He had dropped it casually, tongues loosened by copious amounts of Korean BBQ and soju and a very awkward moment where you weren't sure if Chan was aware that Felix had been balls deep inside of you on camera before. But it turned out he did know, and he didn't mind.
He mentioned Changbin as he poured you another shot of peach soju.
"I swear, I'm not trying to set you up, but I really think the two of you would hit it off."
You shrugged, gave him a playful wink.
"I mean, sure. Do I at least get to see a picture of him before you whore me out?"
Felix broke out into giggles, tumbling backwards into Chan's shoulder, knocking his knee so hard against the table that you had to stop your glass from toppling over.
Chan gasped, blushed furiously. But to his credit, and to your joy, because you knew this was the kinda guy Felix needed, played along nonetheless.
"For that comment alone? No."
"Oh, so he's ugly?" you countered. Not like you cared. Beauty was subjective after all.
Chan had scoffed.
"Trust me, he's not ugly."
Felix nodded gravely next to him, giving you a sly smirk.
"I've seen him, Y/Nie. He's hot. And exactly your type."
You raised an eyebrow at Felix.
"And how do you know what my type is?"
Felix huffed, tossed his head prettily. You couldn't help but notice how Chan's eyes were glued to him.
"Let's just say you loooove complaining about the type of men you never get to have when you're drunk."
Your phone buzzes again, pulls you back into the present where you're perched on your sofa with a stupid grin on your face.
from: xxx-xxx-xxxx fuck, did I already scare you off I swear I can shut up I'm just nervous
God, he's cute.
from: me hiii~ you really don't give a woman much a chance to respond before jumping to conclusions, huh
from: xxx-xxx-xxxx oh no, that's not ha ha fuck I'll see myself out pls pretend I never messaged and don't tell chan, please, he'll laugh at me if he hears how bad I fucked this up
You actually chuckle out loud this time. You click on his number, create a contact.
from: me aw no changbinnie don't go :( I think it's cute~
from: changbin 👀 changbinnie.... I'm so normal about that If I haven't fucked up yet, I'd love another chance but full disclosure I kinda know you wow that sounds creepy I mean ... what you do on the internet
You falter. That sentence is usually not a good sign. The sweet pink bubble you were floating in pops abruptly. You take a deep breath in. Better to know early than to get your heart broken again, you remind yourself. You still hate it.
from: me oh is that a problem?
His reply is instant.
from: changbin 👀 NO! I mean, no, of course it isn't
from: me so ... did you know before chan gave you my number? is that why you texted me?
from: changbin 👀 no!! I mean I did know but that's not why I texted you at least not in a gross way I ... fuck, this is embarassing
There's a moment of silence. Changbin's little bubble appears and disappears over and over again. The next messages that pop up takes your breath away.
from: changbin 👀 basically – chan told me about lix, and then, when he met you, he told me about you, about how you went on a 5 minute rant about the perfect dipping sauce for hot pot when you were out and I was like damn, a woman after my own heart and then when he said our senses of humour aligned and he thought we would get along and you said you were okay with him giving me your number he did also say what you did. like, that you do camming, solo, with lix, with other friends, all that so I may have looked you up just a tiny peek, I swear and ... uh fuck basically I think you're a goddess and I want to worship the ground you walk on and no, camming is not a problem, god, it's so sexy, actually and what's even sexier is that you like a vinegar base for your hotpot dipping sauce anyways ... if you want to block me, that's fine!! but like, I really really need you to know that I would love to take you out on a date sometime
Your whole face is burning by the time you reach the end of his message. He's so ... honest, and it's so oddly charming. You nearly jump out of your skin when the doorbell rings. You scramble to the door, barely able to face the poor delivery guy's eyes when he hands you your food, before you slam the door in his face. You make a mental note to tip him really well later.
You absentmindedly drop the bags on your coffee table and pick your phone back up. You take a deep breath, before you finally reply.
from: me I don't even know what you look like chan refused to show me a picture you could be a 60 year old axe murderer for all I know
from: changbin 👀 OH well, that would be weird, if chan was friends with a 60 year old axe murderer, don't you think but uhm here let me send something real quick before I start overthinking it
from: changbin 👀
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Suddenly, you remember exactly what night Felix was referring to. The one where the hot buff guy at the bar had very kindly rejected your tipsy advances. You were covered in glitter, drunk off fruity cocktails, leaning on Felix's shoulder on the bus, whining about 'just wanting to be thrown around a little'. "I just like ... I want a man who thinks of me as an equal every day except in bed, ya know?! But most of them can't do that."
Then you'd gotten existential. Then horny again. Then you'd thrown up. And Felix had brushed your teeth and cuddled you to sleep, giggling and mumbling how he was sure one day you'd find an intelligent, hot buff dude who would not want you to be a housewife but also rail you into the mattress.
Not your proudest moment.
from: me oh
from: changbin 👀 ... oh? what does 'oh' mean? were those weird pictures to send? I'm sorry if they were, I even asked chan-hyung because I never do this and he said they were good was the gym one too much?!
from: me changbin, oh my god, shut up
from: changbin 👀 😳 🤐 yes ma'am (that probably shouldn't have turned me on, huh)
You don't blush. Years of masturbating and having sex on camera have made shyness a stranger. And men don't exactly sweep you off your feet.
And yet here you were. Blushing at a text message from a stranger. A stupidly hot stranger, but a stranger nonetheless. Well, Chan's friend. Your best friend's almost-boyfriend's best friend.
Your food is long forgotten on the table in front of you. You can always heat it up in the microwave.
from: me I'm going to be so serious right now I need you to take me out on a date asap
from: changbin 👀 oh oh my god yeah, no, absolutely I would love to when's the earliest you can do that doesn't make me look weird?
You giggle stupidly to yourself. If you kick your legs a little, too, that's between you and your fuzzy socks.
from: me saturday?
from: changbin 👀 ... this saturday? like in three days?
from: me only if you have time!! now I'm the one who sounds crazy, aren't I
from: changbin 👀 god, no, you don't sound crazy you sound many things but none of them are crazy at least not in a bad way I'll shut up again now saturday is great I'll text you the details
from: me sounds good~~ I'm glad you texted me, changbinnie I'm looking forward to it
from: changbin 👀 me, too, darling you have no idea
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📸 @/min_knows posted 2 photos
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you want it? j_one ohhhh DADDY j_one grrr bark bark bark grr woof j_one oh wait you prefer cats j_one meow meow mrrrroowwww hiss hiss seungmong @/j_one you are pathetic wtaf
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📸 @/j_one posted 2 photos
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love being friends with photography majors (by @/hynjn) min_knows oh j_one @/min_knows hi 🥰
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📸 @/lixieixie posted 2 photos
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fuck a soft launch when this fine piece of ass is finally mine 😈 mine alone 😈 now everyone help me convince him to stream with me
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from: y/nie 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👨 lix sos im not your strongest soldier i need this man in my guts yesterday tell me not to put out on the first date tell me it's a bad idea
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from: me holy..... 😳😳
from: y/nie 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👨 back off 🤺 that's my man you have your own hunk now please tell me not to drag this man into bed and let him fuck me 25 ways into next thursday on the first date
from: me I just asked chan and apparently, changbin has never even brought home a one night stand so like I'm prettyyyyy sure if you wanted to you could like he wouldn't run away after if you know what i mean chan says he's not the type to hit it and quit it like at all he's a hopeless romantic actually and he's like super obsessed with you :)
from: y/nie 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👨 lix 😩😩😩😩 this is not helping
from: me i mean do you like him???
from: y/nie 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👨 😭 so much he's so perfect almost too perfect, like it scares me a little
from: me then do it! follow your heart! chan says to go for it changbin apparently hasn't stopped talking about you since he texted you he's so down bad for you! and chan says he'll treat you right though when I asked if he means in bed he made a disgusted sound so idk about changbin's sexy skills but with those arms!! he would just have to lie there and look hot and I'd happily do the rest
from: y/nie 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👨 🤺 i am spraying you with a water bottle like a cat okay I'll see how it goes but god, if he kisses me, I might not survive it he's the most beautiful man I've ever seen oh and he's so kind! and so thoughtful and his eyes!!! like i can barely look at him where has chan been hiding him all these weeks i might marry him
from: me ok ok calm down wait until you know how his stroke game is at least before you make life-changing decisions
from: y/nie 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👨 ok lixxxxx i gotta go now wish me luck!!
from: me good luck!! go get your man!!
from: y/nie 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👨 good morning, sweet lixie, my bestest friend i'm marrying him
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📸 @/min_knows posted 2 photos
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hi hiii~ j_one you are actually so beautiful min_knows in a best friend way or ... j_one oh! yeah! haha absolutely seungmong nevermind, you're both pathetic
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📸 @/j_one posted 1 photo
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happy birthday to me 🧁 getting topped by a beautiful man is my only birthday wish. beautiful man please make it happen min_knows happy birthday sungieee~~ min_knows but for the record, your cock is too pretty not to sit on j_one oh haha ... in a best friend way? min_knows absolutely not j_one please come over seungmong kys seungmong but fucking finally
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📸 @/y/nnn posted 2 photos
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brb 🖤 j_one uhm hello?!?!?! j_one TEXT ME RIGHT NOW
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📸 @/j_one posted 2 photos
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finally mine 💘 stream tonight! he's gonna fuck me real nasty to celebrate us finally becoming boyfriends! y/nnn we all cheered! y/nnn wait does this mean y/nnn lmk if you ever need a third 😃 for a stream i mean spearb uh ... min_knows four sounds good, too, you know 😘 spearb UH... seungmong i can't believe the day has finally come min_knows just say you're happy for us, minnie. it won't kill you seungmong ugh. happy for you. or whatever seungmong still mad i had to watch you both pine and jerk off to each other for years j_one what the fuck??? you said you couldn't hear me??? seungmong I told you what you needed to hear seungmong plus I'm your stream mod so ... nothing I haven't heard before seungmong same moans, just more "minho! daddy! please!" in between. tomtato tomato j_one oh my god shut up?!?!?!? j_one im gonna die
<< 📹 .˳⁺୨୧ part 1
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skzms' masterlist // ko-fi
🔖 general taglist: follow and turn on notifications for my library account: @skzms-library 🔞 I monitor ages over there, just like I used to do with my taglist. I will block minors and ageless blogs, and you'll have to message me again to get unblocked. so just have your age in your bio before you follow!
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srslyscary · 8 months ago
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things they’ve said
things bf!skz has said to you
Including: bang chan, changbin, hyunjin, lee know, seungmin, han, felix, jeongin
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Bang Chan
; “you’re too cute for this world, Y’know?”
; “don’t doubt yourself babe. you’re amazing in my eyes.”
; “not every day do you get to wake up to a gorgeous gal.”
; “I know it’s late, but check out this track I made— yeah it’s about you, what about it babe?”
; “stain my face with your pretty lips baby, I want everyone to know I belong to you— yeah with that new lipstick you bought, it’s a cute color. perfect for complimenting my face.”
; “i have seven kids and now they’re also YOUR seven kids.. deal with it, hah.”
; “you’re shorter than me, so your love capacity isn’t as strong as mine. it’s physically impossible for you to love me more babe.”
; “I can’t take my eyes off you. you’re just too pretty— I’m not trying to be creepy!— no— Y’know what I just won’t look at you then.. hehe.”
; “you deserve the universe.”
; “it’s kind of hard to unlove you sweetheart.”
; “it’s only been 2 minutes how do you already miss me.”
; “baby all I wanna do is see you. and do you.— just kidding… or am I?”
; “my goal is to keep you happy all the time.”
; “I love you because you’re the best. intellectual wise I REALLY would hate for someone to touch you lovingly like I do.”
; “excuse the fact that we’re locked in for life and you can’t go anywhere without me- HAHA.”
; “I got addicted to you very easily.”
; “I think I’m just in love with everything you do.”
; “I love you. I don’t think I said that enough today.”
Changbin
; “y’know what we should do? go have a picnic and watch the sunset. wouldn’t that be nice?”
; “you’re always pretty jagiya. you’re especially pretty without makeup.”
; “i’m tired. let’s cuddle, kay? I wanna feel you wrapped up in my arms, I’ll know you’re safe with me then.”
; “I literally just can’t have enough of you.”
; “I’ve been looking at pictures of you for the last 30 minutes—“
; “I like you mostest— no I love you. I’m IN love with you.”
; “wanna ft and eat together?”
; “You’re perfect to me. You always will be— it’s not cheesy it’s the truth!— accept my compliments right now!”
; “stop being stingy and give me more kisses! I’ll die if you don’t smother me— it’s true my doctor says so!”
; “your presence heals me.”
; “You’re like my healing wave and my bright sun.”
; “I can’t even describe in words how sexy you are right now- you’re just- WOW.”
; “FOOD DATEEEE! YAYYYY!”
; “I want you in every way that there is to want a person.”
; “You’re sweet, and hot.. good mix in my opinion.”
; “you should stay up.. I wanna keep flirting with you.”
Hyunjin
; “I wanted to talk to you. I miss your voice and your laugh, and your pretty face.”
; “my love, you could be more discreet if you’re trying to scare me— USING MINHO AS A SCARE TACTIC ISN’T FAIR EITHER!”
; “I’ll be as sassy as I want. Now give me a kiss I’m craving them— yes I’m on my period now hand them over or else.”
; “jokes on you, you’re my number one priority right now. the boys can wait a little while longer.”
; “I wanna stay up and talk to you.— What do you mean no?— that’s too bad, you’re not my mom.”
; “you mean more than the world to me.”
; “I don’t care who he was. he was looking at you the way I look at you. and I should be the ONLY person to look at you like that— cmon love.”
; “I’m physically craving your touch right now— I just want to sock you in the face and then kiss it right where it hurts— I’m joking I love you!”
; “I always wanna be by your side angel.”
; “You’re cute when you’re sleepy.”
; “I’m painting you love, what else would I be doing?”
Lee Know
; “you literally captivate me. your eyes especially. I could spend hours looking at your pretty face and never get bored.”
; “one day I’m gonna train my cats to come beat you up.”
; “I’m gonna punch you in the mouth. With my mouth. Softly.— yea I’m going to kiss you.”
; “stop saying things that make me want to kiss the hell out of you. it’s not funny— don’t laugh!”
; “I want your lips, I want your everything. or rather- I want you here so I can hold you.”
; “when I talk to you.. it’s like talking to my best friend. except I love you and I get to kiss you all over and all that cool stuff.”
; “your stubborn ass is never gonna listen— also I love your ass. literally.”
; “I’m really just.. fucking soft when it comes to you.”
; “yeah babe. you’re really pretty. the prettiest.”
; “You’re literally dreaming i didn’t say that— how’s that gaslighting?!”
; “you make me think of a love song every time I look at you.”
; “baby, just kiss me.”
; “Sure, we can get matching outfits.”
Seungmin
; “you look so innocent but I know you’re not— that makes me weak.”
; “I can tell you so many times how pretty you are, because you’re my pretty puppy and no one else’s.”
; “kinda wanna take you out for dinner— what I’m just saying?”
; “relax pretty puppy, I’m all yours.”
; “I wanna see you drunk off my kisses.”
; “I just like whacked Han in the back of the head and he started crying- funniest thing ever.”
; “we look cute together, don’t you agree?”
; “let’s live together, I hate everyone else except you.”
; “you haven’t talked to me since 12:03pm. I’m lonely. talk to me babe.”
; “it’s not like I hate going out. I just hate everyone else gets to see how pretty you are.”
; “didn’t you say you liked these?— yeah I got ‘em for you.”
; “babe, you’re constantly reading that. what is it?”
; “wanna come watch me practice?”
; “that dress is cute babe, you should get it.”
; “You’re so stupidly cute, it’s getting annoying.”
; “babe, I love you— but stop trying to get me to buy you that dog.”
Han
; “BABE GUESS WHAT— I love you!”
; “hi beautiful, I hope you had a good day!”
; “You’re so cute babeeee, you literally make my heart melt.”
; “wake up I miss you.”
; “baby, have I ever told you how pretty you are?— mhm! the prettiest.”
; “You’re all I’ll ever need.”
; “daily reminder that I’m so in love with you-!”
; “I woke up and the first thing I wanted was you.”
; “this pretty face is all mine— mine to kiss and stare at and compliment.”
; “my favorite thing to look at is you of course!!”
; “TODAY REMINDS ME OF YOU— BECAUSE ITS HOT.”
; “I got butterflies when you called me pretty.”
; “I stay up just to talk to you babe.”
; “girl the only side chicks I got are your other personalities.”
; “You’re always on my mind, duh.”
; “honestly my mom would be so proud of me if I brought you home.”
; “you have me on some foreign level of happy.”
; “why is it that birds chirp to communicate? let’s chirp to communicate baby! — IT’S NOT WEIRD IT’S NATURE.”
; “how’s your day going my beautiful future wife?”
; “face time meeee, I’m with the boyssss, they wanna say hi to my girlll!”
; “I want you. Only you.”
; “just kiss me and don’t stop.”
Felix
; “good morning angel. sleep well?”
; “I want all of you forever. you and your perfect face, your perfect body, your perfect personality.”
; “me and chan bought ice cream! wanna share with me?”
; “BABE THERE’S A SPIDER— oh right.. yeah I’ll kill it-“
; “so you’re saying you saw a cat and your first thought was to text me about it?— god I love you.”
; “you just have me so whipped. I’d do anything for you.”
; “sunshine, can I tell the boys about you?”
; “You’re my entire universe, and whatever is beyond that.”
; “such a pretty face, can’t believe I get to kiss you and call you mine.”
; “of course I made you some brownies! why wouldn’t I?”
; “when I kiss you it’s hard for me to stop.”
; “I love you with my heart baby.”
; “don’t get jealous baby you own my heart, I’m all yours.”
; “I wanna marry you already. I want a house, a dog, a weird grocery list, everything baby.”
; “why are you staring at me, huh beautiful?”
; “You’re really cute when you’re nervous.”
; “I’ll be over in five with pizza. Sound good?”
Jeongin
; “I’m so proud of everything you do lovely!”
; “proceed with caution you might burn down the kitchen.”
; “You’re literally my dream girl.”
; “I was just thinking about you— and our future.”
; “the thought of us kissing won’t leave my head-“
; “I miss you, call me?”
; “You’re cute.. we should be cute together!”
; “stay called me a peach.. do you think I’m a peach lovely?”
; “I don’t care what you wear, you’re beautiful either way.”
; “there she is— the girl of my dreams.”
; “I wanna be your every thought, every second of the day.”
; “I text you when I miss you.. which is all the time.”
; “can I tell you something? don’t freak out.— I love you.”
; “Sorry im busy! I’m discussing future wedding plans with your mom!”
; “you hungry lovely?— scratch that I know you’re always hungry, let’s go to that cafe down the street.”
; “send me videos of you— why would I want nudes? — no send me videos of you being silly and singing!”
; “I’m glad I met you too, you’re the best thing to happen to me.”
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aliceramblez · 11 months ago
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BroZone Brothers With An Insecure S/O 😔💗
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Tags: GN! Reader, Self-Deprecating Jokes, Low Self-Esteem, Abandonment Issues, Slight Body Insecurities. Fluff/Comfort.
A/N: Here we go with our first request! I really liked this idea as someone who has low self-esteem, and honestly it goes to all of y'all who think you're not good enough— cause you are! Also sorry it took a bit! I've been sick because the universe hates me 🙃
Feel free to leave a request & hope you enjoy! ^^
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John Dory
At first, he doesn't really know what to make of it.
He finds it a bit strange, but doesn't question your odd sense of humor, and will sometimes even join in on the joke by saying stuff about himself, thinking it's some sort of inside thing between the two of you.
“Man, I can't believe I'm so clingy, sorry! Feel free to use me as a bad example, at least that way I won't be totally useless, haha!”
“Ha! You think that's bad? Babe, you haven't even seen me when I'm up at night just staring at the ceiling contemplating my life choices.”
It isn't until getting a good smack from Bruce and Floyd that he realizes you're actually being serious. And the prospect of that kinda puzzles him, not gonna lie.
“Look at you, tiger! Got yourself plenty of groupies already— Not surprising honestly. Don't have to worry about backups when you decide you're ready to move on, either!”
After a performance at the Pop Troll village, everyone is gushing over BroZone because of course they are. JD only barely manages to squeeze past the number of fans to get to you on the other side of the podium.
The oldest sibling looks at you in shock, and has to get closer to make sure he heard you right. “Babe, why would you say that?”
Caught off guard, you manage a nervous chuckle as you play with your hair. “I-I mean... Wow, would you look at the time! We gotta meet with Poppy and the others!”
John Dory stops you on your tracks and demands an explanation, which isn't really good for your poor heart. All you can do is kick the dirt and avoid his gaze, since that makes what you're about to say much easier to voice aloud.
“I mean... You're John Dory. You could date any troll you wanted and yet you're sticking with me. It honestly feels like a dream sometimes... And I'm scared of the day you realize you can do WAY better and decide to leave me.”
After processing this, he immediately holds your face in his hands and gives you the most serious expression you've ever seen on him. “I don't want just any random troll... I want you. You're my number one fan, and I'm yours, so don't even think about stuff like that, okay?”
After the exchange, he's always on the lookout for whenever your bad habit wants to kick in again and is ready to stop it ASAP
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Spruce/Bruce
He notices it happens mostly when you're working at the cantina.
Whenever you get an order wrong, trip over your own feet or don't remember how to work one of the machines properly, you'll go into an awkward insecure flight response.
You'll say “Oops! Sorry! Clumsy Twinkle Toes, coming through!” while grinning and laughing along with the customers, but Bruce knows that it's affecting you more than you lead on.
It also happens whenever BroZone is getting ready to perform and you don't know what to do with yourself since you're “standing in the way”, despite being told multiple times that it's okay for you to be backstage with everyone else.
When he talks to you about it, you get really uncomfortable and just say that it's no big deal and that you can handle it.
“I've always been a clumsy person, so I guess that's always making me doubt myself over the smallest of things... Sorry if it's annoying.”
Bruce will then proceed to give you a huge warm hug and a kiss on the forehead as he whispers comforting words into your ear.
“Hey, I can be clumsy too! I've always been the worst out of everyone when it comes to choreography. Don't tell JD though, cause I know he'll throw a fit knowing I don't practice.”
He'll throw in other examples that may seem inconsequential to you, but you appreciate the effort nonetheless and smile and giggle through the embarrassing stories he shares.
He helps you get more confident by being there with you while taking orders at the cantina and praising you whenever you get something right— albeit in private as to not embarrass you.
Same goes with rehearsals, where he WILL drag you into the lounge area to hang with his brothers and/or Poppy and Viva when they decide to visit, too.
Overall he wants what's best for you and will try and push you out of your comfort zone, but only in a safe environment where he knows that if something does go wrong, it won't be as catastrophic as you make it out to be in your head.
You never stop thanking him for being your crutch during these times.
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Clay
The moment he hears the words come out of your mouth he's completely flabbergasted.
First of all, who said those things to you? Because he swears he just wants to talk to them—
It's at a sleepover with his brothers and the gals at the Bergen Golf Course, and among the many games, snacks and movies watched, pictures are also taken.
As soon as you take a look at the array of selfies, you let out what sounds like a mix between a laugh and a sigh.
“I mean, at least it stays consistent— in photos, I look ugly. And in real life, I'm also ugly!”
As soon as those words leave your lips, Clay is at your side with an almost unreadable expression, only to snatch one of the photos from your hands. “How DARE you say that about the most attractive troll I've ever met? Shame on you!”
He then starts going around the room waving the picture around to his brothers, saying stuff like “Look how attractive my S/O is! I'm dating them!” while you're just blushing profusely and begging him to stop (even though deep down your kinda giddy about it).
After that day, Clay will do small gestures in which he reminds you how beautiful he thinks you are. Everything to outright saying it each morning, joking about it with his brothers, and even bragging about you to his friends in the Bergen Golf Course.
He's a simp and he's totally okay with that because it's you.
Clay feels like he's the luckiest troll in the world for being able to snatch someone like you since he's “the most boring and uninteresting of the bunch”, so he feels like he's hit the jackpot.
You immediately tell him that he's not boring to you and that he's the best boyfriend ever, which only causes him to smirk.
“Doesn't feel good to know the person you love feels so bad about themselves, does it?”
Finally realizing his reverse psychology, you give in with a laugh. “No, it doesn't. I guess... We can both work on that? Together?”
And so you do, and end up helping each other whenever one is feeling down in the dumps, as a sort of personal cheerleader. You truly couldn't have asked for someone better.
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Floyd
You're the kind of person who's very vocal about your interests.
So it's no surprise that you have to catch yourself mid-ramble whenever you're talking about something you're either interested in or knowledgeable about. And with Floyd being such a good listener, it honestly slips your mind more times than you'd prefer.
After realizing you've been talking for too long, you turn pink in the face and start apologizing profusely.
“Sorry! You probably didn't need to hear all of that. They didn't call me ‘Chatter Box’ when I was younger for nothing! Haha...”
But Floyd could care less about any of that. He loves hearing you talk, not just because he's not much of a chatty person, but because he just finds it incredibly endearing.
He'll hold your hands in his own and give you the softest smile ever that just makes you think that it should be illegal to be THIS sweet.
“You're just so cute when you get lost in the moment like that. Besides, I love seeing you happy. By all means, I'm glad you get to do the talking for the both of us, otherwise we wouldn't get anywhere in this relationship.”
You laugh at his attempt to make you feel better and melt under the touch of his lips on your cheek.
After that, whenever you go out either just the two of you or with your group of friends, Floyd will encourage you to express yourself. He does this by either asking you a question directly or subtly incorporating you into the conversation by saying something like. “I think (y/n) knows about this kinda stuff. Don't you, love?”
Obviously this all happens with your consent beforehand, since he doesn't want to put you in a tight spot, either.
Either way, he always values whatever you have to say, since you always bring in new perspectives that maybe others didn't think about before.
He will also encourage you to be yourself and not try and match your topics of conversation with things you think other people will find interesting. You deserve to be happy by sharing what you love with the world.
Poppy and Viva are huge helps in the art of feeling confident by speaking your mind, and Floyd couldn't be happier for you.
You thank him by telling him about your day each night, in which sometimes he'll fall asleep to the soothing sound of your voice, which only warms your heart on so many levels.
“Goodnight, my prince.”
“Goodnight, my little chatter box.”
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Branch
Just like Clay, this man is ready to throw hands.
Just give him a name and he'll get the job done before sunrise—
He notices that sometimes you struggle with finding outfits for different occasions, either something casual, dressy, classy, etc.
But it's not because you don't have anything in your wardrobe, on the contrary it's pretty much brimming. It's more the fact that you're not satisfied with any of them because you feel like you don't look good in them.
Branch tries to convince you otherwise, saying that you look great no matter what you wear, but you can't help but feel self-conscious in anything that isn't a good old sweatshirt.
He isn't knowledgeable in fashion (clearly) so he enlists the help of Poppy and The Snack Pack to try and cater outfits to your exact measurements, along with any other nitpicks you've had in the past with either texture or material.
I mean, Branch has backup plans to his backup plans, you think he wouldn't keep notes on what kind of stuff his S/O doesn't like— INCLUDING mundane stuff like their clothing?
He surprises you with these, and you can't help but feel attractive in them since he paid extra attending to the complaints you had from your own designs.
“I personally think you look great no matter what you wear. But if you feel so strongly about it, might as well get some stuff you'll actually enjoy wearing.” He'd said when you asked why he did it, and your heart just melted.
You vow to try and work on your self-imagine regardless, which he gets happy over and says he can't wait for you to see yourself the way he does.
889 notes · View notes
ranhaitanisgf · 10 months ago
Note
Hi!! Could u do headcannons for chifuyu, kazutora and baji with a gf who has a older brother in their gang? (Toman and valhalla)
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you'll be friends, right!?
synopsis: how will they act when your older brother is in their gang?
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☆ a/n ˎˊ˗ first req of the new season new year new me :3 srsly tho its sooo nice to b taking new reqs after finishing up my old ones ! thank you so so much for requesting anon, and i hope everyone enjoys !! xoxo
☆ characters ˎˊ˗ chifuyu matsuno, baji keisuke, kazutora hanemiya x gn!reader
☆ wc ˎˊ˗ 2.5k+
masterlist
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chifuyu matsuno: 
❥ the fact that your brother is in toman is something that you’re surprisingly able to hide from him for a good while; chifuyu is kind of easy to lie to, (one of his only faults). well, it wasn’t that you exactly lied to him per say, you just…didn’t mention it. that’s not a crime, right? 
❥ okay, maybe it’s a bit of an exaggeration. chifuyu is strangely perceptive and maybe has noticed that you’re keeping something from him, but it was easy to hide the fact for so long because he trusts you. he trusts that you wouldn’t keep anything important from him that concerns safety and he trusts your judgment. he doesn’t want to be the kind of boyfriend that is controlling and needs to know everything about your life, so he makes sure to tell you that you can come to him with anything and leaves it at that. 
❥ you actually find your brother to suddenly be a useful source of information for once! at first he didn’t want to tell you anything about toman, but with your incessant nagging you finally broke him, earning useful information about things that were going on. it wasn’t really like you understood any of it, but you wanted to have an idea of what was going on with chifuyu, (because he definitely wouldn’t be telling you anything about it). 
❥ your brother isn’t sure why he shouldn’t talk to chifuyu at all, but he only avoids him so that he doesn’t hear any more nagging from you, (it’s easy for him to avoid him anyways since they aren’t in the same division). 
❥ there are times when you accidentally let it slip that you know more about toman that you’re supposed to, which makes chifuyu feel a bit skeptical, but he usually writes it off as you overhearing him chatting with his friends about it. 
❥ when chifuyu finally finds out that your older brother is in toman, you aren’t even there. it happens after a meeting when he overhears your brother with his friends complaining about you, talking about how you had eaten all the snacks in the house and had left the empty bags in the cupboards just to piss him off. 
❥ normally, chifuyu would have ignored it and assumed it was someone with your same name, but it caught his attention because you had told him about that specific thing. you’d laughed to him about how funny it would be to see your brother so pissed off, promising him that you would record it and show him, (he had to admit, it was pretty funny). and now that he’s looking at the guy…the dude looks exactly like your brother. 
“oi…c’mere a second…”  “ah shit…” 
❥ now that chifuyu has figured it out, your brother wasn’t really in any sort of mood to try and make some sort of half-baked explanation. he just admitted that he was your brother straight-up, saying that you had told him to avoid chifuyu while at toman meetings. 
❥ imagine your surprise when you opened up your window for your brother to sneak back home and saw chifuyu right behind him. 
“oh wow, chifuyu! haha, what’re you doin’-?” “(y/n), i know.” “well!” 
❥ he isn’t mad at you; he just doesn’t understand why you hid it from him. in his eyes, it doesn’t really seem like a huge deal and he doesn’t think that he’s done anything to make you think that he would be mad, so he’s really more confused than anything. 
❥ when you explain to him that you just wanted to be able to know when he’s going through a hard time in toman, he feels like you’ve literally taken his heart hostage. of course, his love for you before was absolutely endless, but the fact that you went through that much trouble because you wanted to know what was going on with him…it did something to him, (he ended up staying the night that day because he didn’t want you to leave his arms). 
❥ after that, it’s surprisingly chill. your brother and chifuyu are friendly now, and it also eases your worries more. despite the fact that they both consistently assure you that nothing will happen to them, you feel better knowing that they can look out for each other and have each other’s backs, (more like chifuyu can have your brother’s back, since you’re sure your brother is useless). 
❥ it also means that you get to see chifuyu more! he’ll sometimes come home with your brother after a toman meeting, coming in to see you and have some quality time with you that the two of you didn’t get to have during the day, (it was hard to consider the time you see him in school as quality time). 
❥ he sometimes ends up falling asleep in your room, so it’s a mad rush when one of you wakes up in the morning and realizes what happened, (neither of you regret it though). 
❥ you don’t tell him this, but sometimes you wake up in the middle of the night and realize that the both of you have fallen asleep. you just don’t have the heart to wake him up when he’s sleeping so peacefully, so you decide that the two of you will just deal with it in the morning, (what? you’re not doing that because you like to hear his morning voice! what a wild accusation!). 
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baji keisuke:
❥ literally already knows. 
❥ it’s a bit of stretch for him to know every single member in toman, (he might be able to do it if he really put his brain to work) but your brother is in first division, so it’s kind of hard for him not to know. he takes pride in having a good relationship with all the members of his division, so it wasn’t hard for him to put two and two together when he saw the resemblance and the same last names. 
“(y/n), your brother is in toman.” “well, yes. you have a good eye, kei.”  “haha, sarcasm, very funny. why didn’t you say anythin’?”  “i dunno, i didn’t really see any point.” 
❥ he gives up on trying to see your point, instead deciding to just agree with you. 
❥ of course, baji would go to a lot of lengths to protect the guys in his division, but he makes sure to keep an extra eye on your brother. it isn’t because he doesn’t trust your brother to handle himself, but more so because he knows that if anything did happen to him, you would be devastated, (as much as you say you don’t give a shit about your brother, keisuke knows you care). 
❥ baji would do damn near anything to keep you safe and happy, so he makes sure to tell chifuyu and ryusei to also keep an eye on your brother. he keeps it on the down low though, not wanting your brother to know that he was paying more attention to him. 
❥ because baji knew your brother before he knew he was your brother, they are pretty chill with each other, hanging out with the rest of first division after meetings sometimes. 
❥ this also means that whenever baji is over to your place, you and your brother are lowkey (highkey) fighting over who gets to hang out with him. 
“well he’s my friend; i’ve known him for longer!!” “okay, well he’s my boyfriend!! that automatically trumps friend, so he’s mine!”  “uh, do i get a say in this-?” “no!”
❥ it’s quite entertaining.
❥ in all seriousness though, you didn’t know how nice it would be for baji to be so chill with your brother and the rest of your family until it actually happened. you’re not sure why, but it gives you a sense of comfort and happiness seeing him interacting with them all, especially when he gets along so well with your brother, (it’s not because you give a shit about your brother, okay?!). 
❥ adding on to this, ryoko has basically accepted you as her second child, accepting you into the family immediately and treating you as if you were her own blood. you would say that she treats you like she treats keisuke, but given the fact that she physically tries to fight him makes you retract that statement. 
❥ she also will regularly invite you and your brother over for dinner, saying that she needs to get to know her future family, (it makes baji let out a giant sigh and makes you blush a bit, but neither of you say anything refuting it). 
❥ both your brother and baji have made an agreement to never tell you about anything that goes on in toman. you’ve tried to go against it and ask them to explain more to you, but neither of them will ever share more than very basic information about anything that’s going on, (even when you constantly pester them about it). it pisses you off that they claim it’s for your safety; how would knowing simple stuff about what’s going on put you in danger? 
❥ they will never budge. 
❥ the three of you regularly play mario kart with each other; of course, you always come out on top, which makes the both of them accuse you of cheating, (how would you have even done that?!). sometimes baji will invite chifuyu as well, which you think makes it even more fun. 
❥ despite the fact that you always bag on the both of them for doing dumb stuff and being in a gang, you suppose that you get why they do it. it isn’t because they want to make trouble and be violent with other dudes, but it’s for something more, and you can appreciate that, (it’s practically the only reason you stopped pushing to know everything that was going on with them). 
❥ baji and your brother are the official (y/n) protection squad, mean mugging anybody who looks at you sideways at school. you’ve been wondering why they have been following you around everyone, but you immediately shooed them away when your friends told you what they’d been doing. 
“you guys can’t just be doing that to everyone who looks at me!! have some faith in people, will you?!”  “no.”  “absolutely not.”
❥ it’s okay, they’re just doing it because they love you. 
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kazutora hanemiya: 
❥ when kazutora and your brother first met, you swore that you could see the hostility swimming in both of their eyes, the both of them becoming extremely stiff and staring at you. 
“this is the guy you’re dating?! you can’t be serious!!” “(y/n), this is your brother? jeez, i feel bad for you being related to him…” 
❥ neither of them had been willing to give up why there was such bad blood between the two of them, so you had to threaten kazutora with not talking to him for a whole month before he confessed. 
“i kinda…beat him up… “what?!”
❥ you weren’t sure who to be more angry at, so you decided to wait to hear the full story and then decide. 
❥ it took a lot of threats and pushing, but you finally got it out of kazutora. apparently, your brother had been sent on some kind of side work mission of picking up some money from another gang when he’d been ambushed, essentially getting robbed for all the money and leaving him with nothing. 
“how much was it?”  “...10 million yen…” “WHAT?!” 
❥ you decided to drop the matter, finding kazutora completely innocent; hell, he was a better person than you. if you had 10 million yen and the person who was supposed to pick it up let it get stolen…you definitely would have killed him, (not seriously, but still, 10 million?! how does some random gang even get that much money?! how is that possible?!)
❥ now that you were aware of the bad blood between kazutora and your brother, you found it rather funny to watch their interactions whenever you had kazutora over, the awkwardness between them unmatchable. neither of them wanted to incur your wrath, but they also both had their pride to uphold, so they just flatly would greet each other and would shuffle around each other, (you were always shaking from holding your laughter in). 
❥ in all seriousness though, you don’t like the fact that they are both in a gang. even though neither of them would tell you anything, you had somewhat of an idea of things that were going on due to a friend of yours whose boyfriend was in toman. of course, you know next to nothing of the gang dynamics in tokyo, but you weren’t entirely sure that the gang they were in was…good…wouldn’t toman be better? 
❥ they immediately rejected your idea when you pitched it to them. 
❥ you have no way to know this, but kazutora very very subtly will keep an eye on your brother, although it’s completely for your sake. he isn’t really sure if you care too much about him, but even kazutora knows that losing a family member is devastating, so he will do whatever he can to keep you from having that burden placed on you. 
❥ your brother consistently grills you whenever you go out with kazutora, acting all high and mighty as if he’s ever actually done anything useful for you. he gets real quiet though when kazutora actually shows up, suddenly becoming quiet and shuffling to his room. 
❥ there’s a part of you that wants to have them make up so that it isn’t so damn awkward, but you’re not sure how to go around that, (you also think it would be funny if this keeps going on). they both have the kind of personality that wouldn’t let them apologize nor forget about the incident, so it was a bit of a stalemate. 
​​❥ you think the only time you’ve ever seen them actually team up to work together was when you started complaining about having some girls in your class teasing and making fun of you for your style. it seriously wasn’t anything crazy, and certainly wasn’t anything like bullying, but they seemed to take it very seriously. 
“hey…are you haruta?” “huh? yeah, who’re you?” “stop bothering (y/n).” “what???” 
❥ they stopped teasing you after that, but it came at the cost of some of your reputation; there is now a rumor that you have two delinquents at your beck and call who do your dirty business for you. great. 
❥ when you confronted the two of them, they pretended like they had no idea what you were talking about. 
“you two punks did this, huh!?”   “sounds like you’re makin’ things up. i didn’t do anything like that.” “dunno anything ‘bout that, on my momma.”  “we have the same mom you dumb fucking idiot.” 
❥ maybe there is hope for a friendship between them after all.
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maxwell-grant · 6 days ago
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The Penguin: Episode 8 "Great or Little Thing" Series Finale Breakdown
So first and foremost I need to give a shout-out to everyone who's been following this with me and helped me week after week process and articulate this show, this brilliant Penguin Braintrust without which I would be incredibly lost on how to even begin breaking this thing down this way: @davidmann95, @wil4x, @book--wyrm and my friend Lucas who is not on Tumblr.
And so we're here at last, in the end of the show. This took forever. I need a goddamn break. This isn't enough and will never be enough but it'll have to do. So let's get to the episode that has had the world joining hands in the unanimous urge to see the absolute shit kicked out of Oswald, and has made the character at last earn this:
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(Episode 1) (Episode 2) (Episode 3) (Episode 4) (Episode 5) (Episode 6) (Episode 7)
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So who would have guessed that cartoon dirtbag Rex Calabrese was still gonna turn out to be less of a cartoon dirtbag than Oz the moment we stop seeing him through Oz's eyes. Still a terrible person by every metric, but terrible in the same way a lot of Sopranos characters are terrible: this is, at the end of the day, a job, and you can talk to them, you can sit at a table to get down to business with them, and you probably know people in your life like them, and maybe you can even count of them to get real and even help you when the chips are down, even if it doesn't mitigate everything else that they are or do. At the very end, he was neither the benevolent god-king that Oz saw him as, nor was he the absurd dirtbag gangster we had him pegged as - there was never anything exceptional about Rex Calabrese, he's just a real criminal. Maybe the realest in the show.
I said in the last post that Francis burned with hate at everyone in the world except the person who most ruined her life and haha WOW was I wrong, because it turns she's known the entire goddamn time, and quite possibly no one has ever hated him more than Francis.
Most people in the show who hate Oz do so because he's a destructive bastard who craps on their lives directly, or because he's a lying sneaky fuck who does nothing while their lives are ruined, and Francis has had to deal with both longer than anyone else. I can't possibly count every single way this wildly recontextualizes every single interaction, every moment, everything that Francis has shown us and done since the first episode, because I'd have to recap EVERY scene and line of dialogue she has and we still have so much else to get through.
Why was Francis was so effectively able to withhold affection and hold his feet to the fire and give him that bottomless pit of yearning in his stomach that's driven him to move mountains in pursuit of it? Because Francis wouldn't have loved him even if he gave her the entire world at age 12. She never had any affection or love left for him. Oz was always chasing nothing.
And all along it was Rex who shaped the entire course of Oswald's life, as well as prefiguring his dynamic with Victor, with a single conversation. Oswald spend his childhood wanting for Rex Calabrese to notice and like him and be his friend, and he has no idea how much Rex actually affected his life.
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That fateful night at Monroe's was never the feel-good story about his Ma summoning the willpower to live by dancing away the grief, and it was never even just the night of the eternal promise that Oz thinks back to, it was a fucking trap to kill Oz. Nothing he has in his life is real, nothing he says is true, he has never not lived in complete total delusion.
The sheer disgust in Deirdre O'Connell's face at the "I do too". How much of her personality we completely understand was born from this absolute resentment she's nursed for decades towards Oz.
And this rotten little turd comes at her with a perfect speech that hits her every insecurity and bitterness and spite and situation and convinces her to give him another chance. The nature versus nurture thing again - Oswald was shaped by hardship, by decades of hard work and neglect, by the total absence of his mother's love while in turn being forced to live in stunted childhood dedicating himself to always taking care of her, and maybe what we're seeing here is heavily distorted by Francis's POV - or maybe he was always a little monster, because this guy talking to her is The Penguin, the same guy doing the same things in the same way, either way it doesn't matter. Again, born fucking ready.
So now we see our three major supporting characters - Sofia, Victor and Francis - all of them have shown that they had a chance to walk away from Oz, to not let him ruin their lives further. All of them could have left Oswald behind, and all of them should have left Oswald behind, but they had to come back and justify the choice to do so, they had to get satisfaction, it couldn't have been for nothing. Victor had his car and a girlfriend in a bus waiting for him, Sofia had a jet to take her to Italy, and Francis had Rex Calabrese ready and waiting to put him down without a word. All of them had a chance to get out of the show and never look back, but like Oz, they had to rectify and overcorrect for an insult.
Sofia can't walk away from Gotham without punishing Oz for turning her in, for killing Alberto and further lying to her, she can't accept that this man, this embodiment of Carmine's legacy and hold over her, is still out there unpunished getting away with what he's done. Victor can't walk away from Gotham knowing that his parents did everything right and still died for nothing, that every hurtful thing Oz said was right, he can't let "They don't give out awards for dying in the projects" be the last word in his and their lives. And Francis can't walk away from Oz, who killed her two sons and keeps lying about it, who ruined her life and now keeps promising he will take care of her and acting like everything will be fine, she can't let this pass even if she can't kill him either, and so she'll make him give her the world and die trying.
The tragedy of what happened is what hurt/broke them - the added insult of what Oz said or did is what they just can't live with. It can't be for nothing.
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Goddamnit it, it was really just too telegraphed for it to not happen the way it did.
I fucking knew it the moment the episode started and we got the grungy boss orchestral take on the funny Penguin chords that we were in for some calamitous shit.
We see at first that, in spite of seemingly failing, Vic has graduated to the point he can give his own speeches, gain his own allies, run his own cons - he's not just Oz's proxy, but will manage to convince the others to become such as well, and he's coming at this from a place of complete sincere belief in everything that Oz says, all of the man of the people rhetoric he will so thoroughly pervert and then sell to the people actually responsible for everything he told Victor he was fighting against.
Zeke walks up to him nearly crying about how Sofia blew it all up and Vic instantly asks back where's Oz - not because he doesn't care about Crown Point, but he's already processed it and has already learned with Oz how to just barrel forward regardless, now it's time to get to work. Victor who so readily throws himself into rescuing Oz again and again. Victor who's lost everything - he doesn't have his family, he doesn't have Graciela, he doesn't have the other mobs backing him up, and right now he doesn't even have Crown Point anymore, all he has is Oz.
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The man in red who reads the Law Gave him three weeks of life, Three little weeks in which to heal His soul of his soul's strife, And cleanse from every blot of blood The hand that held the knife - The Ballad of Reading Gaol
Sofia dressed in two thematically appropriate outfits - the red scarf echoing both the first outfit we see her in, back to covering her neck but in control of her own collar, and the outfit we see her the farthest back in time with at the start of Episode 4, and with her final crimson fur coat outfit accompanying her final greatest triumph and ultimate defeat in the show. Not only that, but in this episode she also gets to perform characteristically appropriate stylized torture - holding a family intervention and therapy session with mafioso torture tactics to try and wrench the truth out of her victimizer, enacting calculated sadistic yet righteous justice via psychological breakdown, and ultimately allowing the woman he victimized and wronged to take her killshot at him.
See, it's not just that Sofia Gigante is a Batman Villain, or that she's well passed the threshold of supervillain. Cristin Milioti doesn't play Sofia like she's a new character, which she basically is, and she isn't just playing a tortured gangster lady protagonist dipping into camp villain territory, which she also is - she plays Sofia Gigante like she's been a Batman Rogues headliner for decades now stepping into the spotlight once again, like she's the dark modern revamp of someone Adam West would have thought and she's just always been around showing up in stuff along with The Penguin, like she's only not fighting or teaming up with Two-Face in this because he's not here yet. It is crucially important that Sofia passes every standard of Batman Villain imaginable with flying colors, in part because it helps to reinforce that The Penguin is a monster all his own.
Even here, with as much power as she's ever possibly held over him, reduced him to a whimpering begging mess to be killed off in a second, she is so shocked at the sheer brazen selfishness and delusion and level of bullshit on display, that even now he won't break character and think about his actions and admit to what he's done not even to save his own mother from mutilation, that she just loses the script entirely. Her entire show of power collapses and she physically recoils from sheer disgust at just how low Oswald is, at just how much he lacks the ability to even suffer for what he's done. Realizing that there is simply not enough of a soul in this filthy beast to even torture, and that however much she hates Oswald for ruining her life, someone had a prior claim all along.
Eve - Sofia - Francis in the end united in, however much they may dislike each other, however different their circumstances may be, there is nothing they could possibly do to each other that would be worse than what Oswald has done to all of them, joined in silent agreement that their rage ultimately belongs in a bullet fired at Oz's head and that they deserve their kill shot at this man.
"I had enough to give, Oswald".
This really is gonna be the high point of Francis's life from this point on.
Aw man, I liked Sofia's scruffy dirtbag detective, I wanted him to stick around as one of the reocurring characters like the movie cops
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Oh Victor, sweet kind Victor, you couldn't possibly ask for anything worse in the entire world.
Oz feebly already beginning to lie and spin his new version of the events, that Sofia stabbed him and fucked up with Ma, and here comes Victor with the reversal of their dynamic, seeing this guy who's been brought low by the oppressive force looming over his life that he must defeat (because all that Victor knows about Sofia at this point is that she used to be Oz's boss and is now out to kill them, that she is scary as hell, and regardless of whether or not she was the Hangman, she just bombed his fucking neighborhood) and reaching out to him with a speech about solidarity and dignity and self-worth and picking yourself up by your fucking bootstraps to save the day. And Oz responds by coaching him on how to be a better bullshitter. Because to Oz, he knows the playbook by heart, but Victor meant it all.
Victor rebuilds Oz from basically nothing by providing him with the validation that he so desperately always craved and never got, saying all the things he always wanted to hear, poised so they can finish this together, poised to give him not only the army he asked for, but a full-blown revolution, and he never once asks for anything in return. Just, goddamnit this isn't hurting any less.
"She, sh-she'll never look at me again, all right?....unless I get this done. Got a promise to keep." Maybe the one and only time his mask ever fully cracks. For a second. He rebuilds it right back up and gets to work, but it cracked. He knows what he's doing, up until the moment he doesn't. It's that simple.
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A lot of what drives Oz is acceptance, and a lot of what drives him is his desire to be accepted in worlds that have been declared, by how they run themselves and by the people that inhabit these worlds, as worlds that he was never going to be included in. And one of those worlds is the hierarchy and the hoi polloi of the political realm and the power within the political realm because he understands that all politics are corrupt essentially, and the damage that he could do then in being part of a political infrastructure of Gotham interests him. I thought it would be nice if, in that time jump, he had been invited to maybe a gala or two, you know what I mean? It'd be awkward. He'd be slurping out of the fucking teacup, there'd be stains on the table, he wouldn't really fit in, but he’d fucking love being there. - Colin Farrell
Mirroring the scene in Episode 01 where he adjusts himself next to the car, scuffing himself up to look like the sleazy funnyman the Falcones keep around for kicks, now he's dressing up as much as he can and asking Victor for input, because he truly values what the kid thinks and, goddamnit.
"C'mahn, I don't bite", pfft yeah, not in this movie universe anyway. And to the same guy you did the nose-gushing-blood bit to, even.
Minutes inside of City Hall and he already parks his ass right on Bella Real's seat - not as any kind of intentional slight against her, it's just naturally where he goes to, even before the scene ends and we see his new plans start to come to fruition.
Guy who takes offense at Viti calling Sofia a psycho and then goes up to Councilman Hady talking about the unhinged loony bin broad who went "full psycho" that he's handing to him on a platter, pointedly calling her Falcone.
At first I thought it was funny that Sal Maroni was getting blamed here for Bliss and the underground lab, but then I remembered that he was actually the one who introduced Drops to Gotham and the whole epidemic that became, so if anything it is an extremely easy part of the story to sell, even without his body being down there and all.
"You're gonna have some trouble, Oz" - pointedly smiling and calling him Oz instead of Oswald as he had up to this point, because by that point he's already a crony and already willing to work with this guy handing him all these miracles.
"You wanna be welcome? You gotta look, clean" Yes Father Pal, I Shall Become A Capitalist Caricature
You can see in the walk around, in his look at Bella Real and the mayor's office high up above and the steps, how little Ozzie's gears turn once again and rebuild his life after losing the streets and everything that happened with Ma - This is the next nest, this is the next throne, this is next schmuck I gotta cozy up to, this is the next boss looking down on me that I gotta destroy, there's the reward waiting for me if I do. This is the one that matters, I did everything in the shit and now I'm gonna get me sum goddamn respeck, Feh Ma of course.
And before all of this we see Sofia's next move, showing the ways in which she is good at this, the ways in which she truly is something outside of the worldview of what these gangsters are used to, and why she is going to lose. "Because I can". She is good at commanding a room and promising rewards beyond the wildest dreams of these street crimelords because she can offer everything they want and lose nothing she cares about for it, she will hand them everything and dip because she can, and she is going to lose because she can lose. Because she still thinks there is an end in sight for her, she thinks she will get to walk away from this universe and go meet a happy ending at a cafe in Florence.
It's not just that Sofia was born into privilege and never really lived in Gotham and could just hop onto a plane out of here anytime, it's also that she has room in her life for introspection, self-awareness, consideration towards others, and all those things that come easier when you're "born full", and not when you're the starving hustler for whom leaving the city was never an option even if he had all the money in the world, the hungry animal who wants this, wants everything, harder than anyone has ever wanted anything. The guy who has no room for anything else in his brain other than a perpetual bullshit generator set to a 24/7 chorus of "I GOTTA WIIIIIIN"
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Another element to her that I really love is, she's good at this. She knows she's good at this, she was supposed to take over the family. She may not know the ins and outs of the game as it currently stands, but she is good at this. Some of it is, I think that's the only world she knows, and some of it is there's something in there, that's always been there, and she believes it is rightfully hers. There's an element of, "I need to have made it worth it for something", and if that means power, then okay. - Cristin Milioti
There’s a level for both of them that they enjoy each other’s suffering, and that sort of leads to Sofia’s downfall. If she didn’t need to see Oz suffer she might have been free. And she really gets in her own way in that regard and largely because Oz is this crutch that she just cannot let go of. - Lauren LeFranc
And here we get to the end of season 1 of HBO's The Sofia Show, the bittersweet in hindsight but extremely cathartic torching of the set as a last hard-earned spiritual victory by our hard-done-by lady protagonist. All of her family is dead, the city is out for her blood, she gathered all the remaining criminals for One Last Job with everything on the line, and she is having a very fun time with her montage destroying her home and family name beyond recovery. She is going to finish her character arc, get to finally kill her former comedy sidekick turned mortal nemesis, and hop on a plane to The White Lotus resort straight away into greener (if only marginally less fucked up) genre territory away from this ugly nightmare city. Alas, this is not The Sofia Show, and it's time for her theme suite to catch up to her once again and tell us of how very badly this is all going to go for her.
And she can't even be that shocked, when the high of burning it all down goes away, when she sees that old Ozzie Cobb wriggled his way out of this jam regardless and is now coming at her with a speech, she can't even react to it. Deep down she knows how the rest of the night is going to go. She may not have expected Arkham outright, but she was braced for a loathsome fate.
It rules so much they give him a big fat fight the power speech with a bloody revolution montage, and we can only sit there aghast with Sofia at the sheer audacity of him to act like this, like a man of the people, thinking he truly has the right to be talking like this and to her of all people.
And now we see how Oz won the gang war, and the next domino to fall on the downfall of Gotham City, and the first effect of his own rise to power: like The Riddler, he has toppled the order of things and he has turned people into extensions of himself, Victor being the first and the one who gave him this revolution, of all the little mini Penguins out there devouring the social structure of Gotham crime forever. You kill the boss, you become the boss now. Everyone can bleed and everyone can be killed and everyone must be killed in the quest to the top, no handrails or codes, they wouldn't invite him and so he crashed. After he unified the criminal underdogs, Victor rallied the underdogs beneath the underdogs, and now the streets are a jungle where there will never be an end to the wars over who gets to be atop the food chain, because they are all fighting to see who gets to be the next Penguin.
For decades people have written Oswald Cobblepot as a creep and a sleaze and an incel who hurts/kills women for rejecting him, or who is chronically insecure about them and I can very confidently say nobody ever did anything half as horrible and half as truthful and half as meaningful as LeFranc did here. We see the other reason why it was so imperative to her that Oswald not be a misogynist, and it has nothing to do with just making him more likeable or sympathetic or honorable. We get in this episode the pay off to the thoughtline: okay, he's actually a gangster who respects women, he does not act like every other prestige drama gangster who ever lived, we are going to center women in this show and he will treat them with respect - now let's watch how he HORRIBLY screws them over in the name of this respectful gentleman persona he lives by, let's watch how he betrays them in the ways that matter most, how he even makes them wish they were dead without personally ever lifting a finger to harm them, let's do some grown-up feminist commentary in Batman for a change and highlight the ways in which men profit from belittling and oppressing and destroying women even when they're pointedly not misogynistic and even self-professed genuine allies to them.
And so it is that the only Falcone mobster who isn't misogynistic towards Sofia is the one who screws her the most horribly. He will murder every man he comes across, he will murder every man he could have been and every man who is even marginally better than him in any way, he will push all of his brothers out of the nest and not tolerate any other big shot in town bigger than him and not even the only man, the only person, in town who loves him will be spared. But he is a gentleman, so he leaves the women alive (well, except for Nadia Maroni, but she was a rival big shot and worse, his boss for a day or two, so she obviously had to go eventually).
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I thought about his greatest fear, and it made a lot of sense to me that his greatest fear would be that love is transactional. That if he does not achieve a level of power and give Francis certain types of things that he’s promised her she might not love him. And that informs every relationship he has on the show It was always important to me, and this was always part of my initial pitch, that if Oz was to achieve a level of power—and that is something that was not up for discussion, that was my job that I was tasked with for the season—that he has to lose something emotionally. It can’t come without a cost. - Lauren LeFranc
"the crooked politics that have allowed wealthy elites like Sofia Falcone to wreak havoc". Oz has weaponized the status quo against her so throughly that she is going away under the exact same image that she did it the first time, as a privileged serial killer and Falcone. She doesn't even get to have her new name anymore, and the rest of Gotham does not see her as the new and strange and horrific new threat that she embodied in Oz's life - she is going away as just another upper-class monster like her dad.
The triumph that Oswald has fought his entire life for, the Big One that he's scraped and fought and hoped his entire life would happen and he'd get to show his Ma at the end, the thing that he's going to throw a party for at this moment, is just a politician on tv saying things that Oswald claims he told him to say.
All of our 3 major supporting characters will thus reach the high point of their lives, on the moment before it is ripped away and they are destroyed forever. Francis gets to finally spit all of her hatred back to Oz and take her revenge on him, and her babies appear before her alive and unharmed. Sofia gets to burn down her father and his legacy once and for all, and is on her way to kill her nemesis and finally be free of it all. Victor succeeds in helping Oz win, they have revolutionized the gangs and defeated the big bad Falcone and he's done right by his new family what he couldn't do with his old one.
And of course, Oswald finally wins - he is the last man standing, he's defeated his greatest enemy, he is the big shot of Gotham and his victory is, so he claims, right there on the tv for his Ma to see, he can finally get what he's always wanted now - and then he doesn't, and then his soul crumbles, before he finishes the job by murdering his heart.
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Oz didn’t need to do that, like it wasn’t actually necessary. In that moment, Victor did not betray him. He did nothing wrong. In fact, the thing that he did “wrong” in Oz’s eyes is that he loves him and that he cares about him and Oz actually cares about Victor. I think by the end Oz sees that as a really big problem because he loves his mother so deeply and Sofia took advantage of that love, and then it became sort of a weakness in his eyes. Victor saw him at his most vulnerable and for Oz to achieve the power that he thinks he needs, he can’t have that level of humanity. He can’t have that heart with him anymore. So he stifles his own heart. He kills it. - Lauren LeFranc
When he said to Vic in the sewer, “They'll tell stories about us one day, kid,” he meant it. At that stage, he actually saw that he could rise and Vic could come with him. It's only when the vulnerability and the shock of his mother being taken from him, and the place of vulnerability and danger that puts him in, that he realizes there's no more love, there's no more affection, there's no one else I'm going to have in my life that can lead me to such vulnerability as my mother has led me to or as this kid could potentially lead me to. - Colin Farrell
He's not relishing being horrible. When he realizes, "Oh God, Victor makes me vulnerable. I can't have that shit anymore." The way that Lauren wrote it, and the way Colin played, there's such sadness under the horror. You're like, oh my God, how fucked up do you have to be that the one person who you feel you have any connection with now, you have to snuff out because it makes you weak. What happened to you? - Matt Reeves
"You think she forgives me?" Once again, the mask cracks. Only around Victor. Only because of Victor. And he can't have that again.
And thus we get to the final parallel between our 3 side characters - that in the end, all they did was serve Oz's own rise to power, and hand him the world in exchange for their lives. All they were to him were additional steps in the ladder that began with his brothers. Francis gave him his life, his drive, his motivation and eternal justification, the insatiable pit in his gut driving him to do this forever. Sofia got him his promotion to Falcone lackey, and then she got him another promotion by handing him the tools with which he could become an underground boss and rally them, and then she got him another promotion by handing him the keys to his political career on a silver platter. And Victor saved his life, more than once. He helped him, provided the justification he has craved for a lifetime, rebuilt him, gave him his revolution, gave him the streets, and showed him the last thing he needed to kill to make it to the top.
Wow man let me tell my good friend, The Family Butcherer, who butchers every family he gets his hands on whether a crime family or a literal one, how much I think of him as family.
"They don't give out awards for dying in the projects"
Just like with Squid, Vic's emotional intelligence dooms him. He sees this man whom is like family to him brought to his lowest point, crushed beyond measure, in what he assumes was just a phenomenally terrible stroke of fate and not something he had any blame whatsoever for, and reaches out to pat him in the back, emotionally reassure him that it wasn't all for nothing, that his family would surely be proud of him, and that there's things to look forward to.
Vic threw away his chance to walk away into the sunset with Graciela and he just had to come back to save Oz (AND Sofia, the one who'd bomb his neighborhood) from the Maronis, the least of all possible evils in his life and his city and who never even noticed him. Victor only narrowly missed out in 2 situations that Oz would have absolutely left him to die in, so there just had to be a third where he'd die in the absolute worst way possible. Not with Sofia's gunshot to the head, not bombed to rubble along with his neighborhood, no, Mr. Carmine 2 had to make it as painful and intimate as possible.
Vic the only Number Two in town who couldn't kill his boss and in fact never even considered doing so, and so he dies - there is just no room for him anymore, not in Oz's life, nor in the new Gotham that the two built together.
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LEFRANC: "You see Oz become this next level monster, I remember the take too. Jennifer and I look at each other, Colin transforms his face in this really remarkable way, that I don't think any of us fully anticipated could be achieved in that way." - The Penguin Podcast Episode 8
I knew that the general sentiment was that, by the end, they kind of wanted to, in a way, kill the Oz that we met in the film. I felt that there was a sense of creative responsibility that leaned towards, “We cannot have this man as a likable character,” which is hard I think they wanted that in the earth by the end of the eight hours. They wanted that RIP. That's gone. I hated that scene. I really did. I was fucking so pissed off. It felt in performing it as — guess what? — you would like it to feel in viewing it. It felt gross, it felt cruel, it felt absolutely insane, and it felt like Oz was reaching a point of no return. - Colin Farrell
So the day after I watched this episode, my friend Lucas messaged me in the afternoon sending me audio messages, "Son of a bitch! Son of a bitch! He stole his identity, he didn't even die with his fucking name! They'll never find him! Fuck, goddamnit!" "ELE MORREU COMO INDIGENTE, PORRA" and, yeah. Yeah. That gets to the heart of it.
If Vic was just a guy taking his money, if Vic was purely transactional, if he was just another Link, he'd have made it. Oz wouldn't have given a shit about him, Oz would have died on the sidewalk when the Maronis hit at minimum. All this piece of shit wants is love, and when he gets it, when it's finally non-transactional, from the ONLY person in the entire show who loved him, he has to kill it, he doesn't know how to deal with it, he has to smother his heart.
He has to become Carmine Falcone 2, strangling the poor and vulnerable of Gotham while pinning all of his crimes on Sofia.
Vic just wanted his family back, man. He just wanted a family again, to at least show his family that they didn't die for nothing. The thing that Oz spits in his face as he dies. It wasn't for nothin.
This show has so many dozen little variations of Penguin getting his heart broken and retaliating cruelly, but this one hurts the most partially because it has no basis whatsoever on any pre-existing insult or cruelty, there was nothing that warranted this, and you still get why Oz felt that he had to do it. The lowest, weakest moment of his life, and he can never permit anything like it ever again.
Victor was his heart, and The Penguin remembered that his heart only exists to be broken.
Victor punctures the illusion, and he cannot have that. Everything about The Penguin hinges on that singular fact of his life: he cannot and will not break character. He cannot break character, otherwise he dies, otherwise Gotham City will eat him alive, otherwise he has done it all for nothing. That is the ultimate threat Sofia posed to him, and why his ultimate victory comes only from creating a perfect delusion and spinning everything that happened in service of it. Because all those things said at Monroe's? They weren't true - his Ma, y'know, it was just her disease acting up, that psycho did something to her, she wasn't thinkin straight, and it was really Sofia that stabbed him and did all that fucked up shit, and his Ma is really happy that she got the penthouse in the end and that he didn't put her down, look, she's crying tears of joy even, I gotta keep doing everything for her.
Everything and everyone in his life, he can spin in service of the delusion, they can all play dress-up with him forever, except Victor. Victor may not have the slightest clue as to what Oz actually did, but he's seen too much, he knows he has vulnerabilities, he knows the thing that Oz needs to bury far, far more than all the horrible things he's done. Killing Victor is maybe the one thing that he absolutely cannot in the slightest spin a decent delusion out of, that he did it for him or did it for noble reasons or anything other than out of disgusting self-serving weakness.
But who's Victor? Some kid who died in the projects and didn't even have a name? Someone with nobody left to mourn him, not even a street to get back to, nothing but a guy who's already forgot him?
That Victor Aguilar? Never heard of him
“I will never think my mother doesn't love me. She was having a bad day when she stuck that bottle in me. She was under a lot of pressure. She nearly lost her finger. She stuck a bottle in my belly. It was a bad day. She didn't get a good night's sleep the night before.” It's that kind of thing. He'll make up fucking whatever. He's already lying when he goes, and he's stitching up his belly, and Vic says, “What happened?” And he says, “Sofia, she stuck me with a bottle.” He's already beginning to bury the truth. - Colin Farrell
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He needed your love, and then you didn't give it to him, and you didn't obey, and you didn't do those things that he needed, and then you mentally aren't there for him in the way that he needs, but he's got to physically keep you around because he's too weak to not do that. He can't give you the gift that he promised you in Episode Six, he's too weak of a man to do that. And so he needs to hold onto you, but under his terms. - Lauren LeFranc
There's a thing that happened on that last day that made my blood run cold, which was I felt Oz not love me anymore. I felt his coldness, and I think that Francis felt it too, and she always had so much of his attention and so much of his love. I don't even think she realized how much she had until he withdrew it. And when he withdrew it, it was utter and… slightly terrified. I was just lying in that bed, I just felt the love leave the room. It's a real thing, and it's gone, yeah, and I think Francis feels it, too. - Deirdre O'Connell
He's this man who is clawing his way to the top, and I knew he wanted power, but what what does that mean for him? That's where I started to conceive of like, he wants his mother's love, and he wants people's affection. He wants to be revered. That was like the main thrust for me of what defines power for Oz, and then by the end you realize that, when he doesn't get those things, he doesn't get his mother's acceptance, he still gets it. He makes sure he gets it. - Lauren LeFranc
So bowled over and miserable I was that I didn't even notice until later that he was wearing a version of the classic Bronze Age/Triumphant get-up.
If the pattern of his life is unjustifiably cruel retribution for slights and insults, perceived or not, by the end Francis had done it to him as well. That she never loved him and in fact always hated him more than anything and anyone else is the biggest insult of all, and so he punishes her the most cruelly, knowingly or not.
"You are who you are, and you couldn't change if you tried."
He will never stop telling Rex Calabrese stories, he will never stop bringing up his brothers and mom as a sympathy ploy, and even if he will never truly love her again, he will never stop ruining the world in her name, he will never stop, he will never stop, he will never stop.
You had to sit through 8 hours chipping away at all of his fun and charm and wacko comedy antics and motivations and all the scruples and principles that he turns out to have less and less of, until he butchers them all in the very end along with the heart of the show. Penguin burning through all of his lovable quirks and charm, everything that we loved about him in the movie, until he comes through as a black-hearted bastard of unlimited malice who will never stop growing and getting worse and putting more lives in danger. Not only as much of a lowlife backstabber as we initially assumed him to be in the movie, but far worse than what we could have imagined.
I said as much that the first episode marks the transition from The Batman to The Penguin with the titlecard, and this brings it back around. The show dies with Victor, we get Sofia's post-credits Nick Fury Tease with Selina's letter and with Selina's theme playing and a final grace note of hope for Sofia, and thus the only character in the show to end with anything resembling positive, and then we get the first scene of The Batman Part 2. showing us the horrible thing in this world that Batman will have to defeat for us.
RIP Bella Real, we all know this asshole is gonna become mayor, and he's not waiting for the next election.
Credit to @book--wyrm for pointing out one more horrible fucking thing, that at the final dance, his hands are covered in scratches, much like the hands of Carmine Falcone when he comforted Sofia.
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“One of the very early things that Lauren pitched was that ending with Eve where she looks like Francis,” said Reeves. “He can’t get what he needed from his mother because she’s no longer in that state because of the dark events and what he’s done, so he recreates it in this other way with Eve, and it’s very disturbing,” said Reeves. “That was something we thought was a great idea and was so emblematic of this guy’s internal state. It’s like, even as he now seems to have gotten that first major step toward being the kingpin, you know that some part of him will never be filled. - Matt Reeves
When I read that, I was like, “Oh my god, we're going full Bates Motel here.” But again, it speaks to what has become a pathological inability to accept the world that he has played such a heavy hand in creating. As far as he's concerned, he's just doing what he needs to do to live the life of a good son. And look, his mother can't talk anymore, so he needs a surrogate. I mean, it would be kept out of the sexual realm — it wasn't about that. It was about the intimacy and the tenderness and the pride that Oz always so deeply needed to feel his mother had for him, and pride in him, that he never really got from her. The one time when he finally can say to her, can go to her bedside and say, “It's done. Everything you said that I was capable of, everything you said that I should aspire to, it's done. I am now the boss. I took it from everyone else.” And he gets nothing back. His mother's already gone. That's just too horrific for him, so he needs a surrogate. He would say to Eve, “Look, I'm grieving. I'm finding it hard to deal with the fact that my mother's alive, but she's not here. She's gone, but she's fully present at the same time, physically, but she's nowhere there. She doesn't recognize me. I don't recognize the woman she's become. Do me a favor. We used to dance together and talk at the end of the night. Would you put on her dress and just let me pretend?” But it was twisted. It was twisted, but I dug it. He needs it from his mom so much. And again, his imagination is so potent that he just cast her as that figure, that most prominent and most powerful figurehead in his life, which has always been his mother. She's got to stay alive. He's got to hear that he did well from her. He's got to hear that she's proud. Look, by the end, he's bananas, as they say in the film. Good cop, batshit cop. At the end, he's batshit. - Colin Farrell
Remember when this show had fun Dolly Parton end credits, remember when this almost looked like it was gonna be fun and light-hearted compared to the movie and The Riddler: Year One
So turns out all along they actually had something real twisted planned with the name Karlo, and the Clayface concept that evokes. Asking his prostitute girlfriend to shapeshift into his crying comatose mom in the room upstairs so he can finally get the dance with her atop the world that he craved his entire life and have her tell him how proud she is that he ruined everything forever.
It is not a good ending, but it is his happy ending. He achieved everything he wanted in the smallest possible amount and at the highest cost imaginable, and thus he burns more than ever to take more and more in the name of a satisfaction he will never, ever have. He ended his arch-nemesis, and he didn't have to kill her, that's not what a gentleman does. He got the streets, and he's poised to take political power, and there is nobody left to care about, nobody except the only person who's ever mattered. He can still keep taking care of Ma as a justification for all the shit he will do now and forever, but he doesn't actually have to take care of her anymore, he doesn't even have to love her or grovel her for validation anymore: He has a Ma who will tell him everything he wants to hear, forever.
Of course, he may not have his three dance partners anymore - his Ma is in a vegetative state, Sofia has been locked away once again, and that kid, what was his name again, ain't around. But then, he will simply move on to new ones: He didn't actually lose his first dance partner, his Ma is fine, look at her telling him how proud she is of him and everything he's done and how unstoppable he is now. And he has a new partner in City Hall who is all too eager to play along to everything he says and does, who will receive and spit back his rhetoric just as Vic did to the streets of Gotham. And if he's defeated his nemesis and dance partner, well, not for long. There's a new one waiting for him. He never wins without losing. He will never again live without his next dance partner there to hound and foil him at every turn. There will always be something in the way.
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It was exciting to me, the idea that we’re going to meet Oz as a mobster, and to play him as just a man. There’s nothing fantastical about him. There’s so many people like Oz in our world who hold a lot of power, who also connect with people because they speak, on some level, the truth. They can be charming and engaging, but also really terrifying and calculated, and not necessarily doing what they say that they will do or caring for people in the way that they say that they will. It felt so timely and so important to really engage with a guy like Oz and not turn away from him, but actually turn towards him so we can start to unpack, in our own society, what makes a man like Oz so appealing, and what makes him equally appalling. - Lauren LeFranc
I think Oz has always been someone who believes that everything he’s saying in the moment is true, and he creates worlds and illusions for himself to merit his actions. He does it sometimes very briefly in impulsive moments, and then sometimes more methodically, and in the end the fact that he didn’t get from his mother what he’s always desired isn’t good enough for him. So he has to create this strange fantasy live in this delusion of his own making, and pay Eve to dress as his mother and force her to tell him he she’s proud of him. So mentally, emotionally, Oz is embracing his own delusion. I think, for the audience, I hope they more deeply understand him psychologically and realize that there is a deeply broken man inside. He is violent and problematic and and very emotional. And that’s really the man that will carry into the next film. - Lauren LeFranc
And it has to end in a total reversal of the movie ending - The Batman ends with showing there is a light in the darkness, that this tortured broken man can fix his mistakes and lead us into something better. The Penguin ends by grabbing your face and desperately yelling at you SOMEBODY FUCKING SAVE US, HE WILL ONLY GET WORSE. The Batman ends with telling us Batman can save us all, and The Penguin ends with telling us Penguin will kill every last one of us in real life if he hasn't already, if nobody stops him.
And so I'll leave these last partings words to the Penguin Braintrust as we close off this series - see you all in therapy and in theaters when The Batman: Part 2 drives us all completely insane once more.
@wil4x
I don't think this Penguin is someone Batman can tolerate, I don't think Bruce can ever save Gotham's soul with a force of corruption as big as Penguin taking root in the seats of power. No amount of informant work can justify letting a monster like Penguin stay "King of Gotham". I think there's an argument to be made that Oz is a bigger threat to Batman's overall long-term mission than guys like Joker or Riddler. Those are huge immediate threats, but Penguin does a lot more long-term damage to the very soul of Gotham and its people. As long as The Penguin is on top, there's no hope, Gotham will never not be the most corrupt and nightmarish place on earth with him in charge
@book--wyrm
He will truly climb anything no loss so great it can't be flipped into an asseet A nuke Francis armed out of pain and grief and desperation and despair And poor vic Only wanting to do good And instead he saves gotham’s own typhoid mary of misery
@davidmann95
so the thing is Oz kills hope for Gotham forever in this
he's replacing the mayor who stands for hope at the end of The Batman with a corrupt comics rando built on a lie so he can install himself as the power behind the power forever Batman can't be alluded to in the slightest until the very end because it can't be until there's no lingering 'aw, I don't want my boy to get Batman'ed' it can't be until we understand truly and completely why this man proves the necessity of someone out there to stop him
The other stabs at this with Oswald, from what I’ve seen, are trying to make him low-down and dirty and vile enough to be a ‘proper’ Batman villain. But this already made him low-down and dirty and vile. And made us love him for it. This isn’t about ‘fixing him’, this is about taking him all the way to the top He’d accept no less
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This is about making him operatically nightmarish enough to be a guy Batman is going to fight forever
Lucas
VENGEANCE, GET OUT RIGHT FUCKING NOW.
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omghallucinations · 3 months ago
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Bang Chan Chart Analysis: in the weeds edition
chart patterns, degrees, fixed stars, aspects, final dispositors, basically all kind of deeper cuts.
ah, bang chan: a double libra gemini rising whose other planets are acting up so much i barely even touched on venus and mercury somehow
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like he's clearly an air sign in every respect--he loooOOOves to talk, he's curious and interested in a lot of different things, he's never met a secret he doesn't want to immediately tell five hundred thousand people on live... but damn some of those other planets (saturn, mars, jupiter, uranus) are loud.
right away i noticed his chart is a bucket chart--every planet is in one half of the circle, except for one planet who becomes the "handle": his aries saturn. saturn is hammering all the other planets on the head so to speak.
saturn: you'll have to come through me motherfuckers
saturn is screaming it's ME i'm the BIG BOSS and as the handle, a lot of things in chan's life are gonna be based on or deal with--for better or worse--saturn stuff (maturation, fear, control, authority, judgment). chan's saturn automatically rockets to the top of his Big Boss list (it will not stay here tho, we've got some other bosses coming).
saturn is in its fall in aries--it doesn't speak the language there. any planet in its fall is usually marked down in influence but i also think it makes the planet more important? chan has to struggle with it. a saturn at home in capricorn (barring other chart factors) is very natural. 8/9 members of girls generation have saturn in capricorn and wow does that make sense. saturn in capricorn prizes Work and is self-conscious/guilty of its feelings (feelings are not productive), it's alllways anxious it hasn't done enough, it is very scared of disappointing people, it's deeply conscious of societal conditioning.
aries is a weird sign for saturn to be in. saturn has a lot of fear, and aries has a lot of fearlessness. aries is a baby and saturn is all about maturation. aries is about acting without thinking, saturn is about making a list and checking it 5 times then deciding not to do it just in case.
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and then. this is fun. saturn goes on the big boss list again because it is unaspected--this doesn't mean there aren't aspects, it means there are no major aspects to other planets. when a planet is unaspected, everyone around you can sure as fuck see the hell out of it, but you can't really. it's center stage but not in the play.
bang chan: i am the cutest, fuzziest lil libra guy :) i just care about my work which is normal :) and i express that care in a very reasonable and chill way :) i just want things to be good! :) everyone around him, shaking in fear from his scathing judgment and innate leadership aura: uh-huh
an unaspected planet is usually a generational thing--chan really popped up like hey girl :) i'm here to really personify our family problems of work, judgement, fear and maturation and just like. make 'em huge and unavoidable. haha. :)
chan's gonna show real extremes of behavior around his saturn, which
in aries seems like it's dealing with issues of creation, self-determination, doing it on my own, that kind of stuff (so he'll deny himself or assert himself too much in turns)
in the 11th house backs that up--the 11th is the aquarius house, so saturn is in aries (a "me" sign) in a "we" (in a sort of detached intellectual sense) house
11th/aquarius usually wants to set u free :) but in a kind of back-handed passy aggy harry styles way, like "i love you so i'll set you free, because i am such an open-minded person, unlike other people (who are tethered to humanity which is both embarrassing and scary to me yuck), also setting you free is less terrifying to me than being perceived :) go with god :) bye :)"
it's in the sun decan, so there's a flavor of "look at me look at me" and identity formation (am i what i produce?)
saturn's most exact aspect is sesquisquare mars which acts a lot like a square, my favorite aspect! squares get such a bad rap but i think they're so much better for your life in the long run bc they force you to deal with things. his mars is in sagittarius, so we have a double fire sign situation: explosive, passionate, loves attention and creation. mars, who also gets a bad rap, is our survival planet. it's like, how are you gonna survive this. how are you gonna get what you want and defend yourself and win (if you care about winning) (chan cares about winning).
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sagittarius mars is gonna go forward kind of joyfully but also in a "fuck you lmao" way. it's courageous bc it doesn't really think anything could go actually wrong. it's gonna Leave if it's bored (and it's already bored). it's gonna wide-angle zoom on the situation and be like "lol embarrassing... for you" and feel 100% sure it's right All The Time. sesquisquare saturn tries to control this force, adds a bunch of fear and repression and Issues (and often in later life, wisdom), so -> chan's gonna really be afraid of his own anger, of losing control of his temper -> ironically he will be unable to stop bouncing between these two extremes to various degrees. u can't control what u can't accept my dude. -> he's also afraid of not being in power, of not winning -> the me/we extreme will also come into play--especially with his sun and moon in libra (that's their whole Thing) sagittarius says "i'm right for objective, philosophical reasons" and aries says "i'm right because i just am bro i don't have to explain myself to you" mars in the 6th house--that drive to assert himself is gonna really go hard at work and in his daily life. this is a #gymbro placement for sure. his daily routine is Let's Fuckin Go At 150% -> his 11th house (where saturn is), loves the idea of people, community, his ideals, is detached from humanity and it comes into conflict with -> his 6th house, which is very much of the world, very critical, very let's get actual shit done and be of service to people sidebar, mars is exactly conjunct the asteroid quaoar-- creation, making new rules and structures, diverging from how things Have Always Been Done, please hold this thought for his uranus, coming up soon
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libra moon at 29 degrees: heard u were desperately trying to maintain equilibrium for emotional security reasons lol
another planet i'm eyeing is his libra moon which is in the anaretic degree, 29. he's very good at this energy but it's gonna test him. with his libra moon he needs contact and dialogue with people to feel secure but it can't get too deep because that's gonna freak him out. he is super comfortable being vulnerable and emotional on the internet because the internet is not real. i mean it's real, but it doesn't feel real. it's the equivalent of over-intellecualising your feelings so you don't actually feel anything (which an air moon always enjoys, as a hobby). just like it's way easier and less scary to be in love with an idea of a person, rather than the actual person! the actual person can really fuck up ur moodboard!
chan needs things to be pretty, equal, even-keeled. libra is such a funny sign because often it gets flattened to this like "cutey pie flirt" stereotype which i would say is almost exclusively libra venus. libra is a cardinal sign--an acting, initiating sign--and can be a lot more controlling than it likes to pretend imo. it's also in his sixth house--he's gonna feel safe when he can be of service to others, when he can get things done, when he can edit shit, basically.
he's also a new moon baby, which gives a moon a fun, aries-y, baby-tries-(food)-for-the-first-time vibe. removes a lot of those libra inhibitions and adds a lot of need to feel special.
chan is so good at making sure he feels safe by trying to keep everything cute and not too deep and staying on the surface or removed from the situation through constant activity and like, pruning everything, trying to perfect everything (therefore not having to actually deal with anything). howmstever, this system is gonna repeatedly implode throughout his life. soz bud. his emotional foundation's gonna get pummeled on and off which sucks because he has an almost manic need
for emotional safety through strategic diplomacy and avoiding confrontation
for emotional safety through constant work and "perfecting" everything
for people to like him everyone needs to like him or he will die
(not the real him, that makes him nervous, the projection of him that he painstakingly curates, that is safer)
it's not especially fun to deal with.
bright side, wisdom in later life!
mercury, ruler of chan's ascendant: pretty much exactly what you'd expect?
as a gemini rising, chan's ruler is his mercury in libra in the 5th but ironically i don't feel like she's as major of a player as some of these other planets. you can see the communication and curiosity focus of his life, and in the 5th house of self-expression, creation. mercury is sextile mars and pluto, a talent for making his voice heard and powerful, trine uranus in the 9th he's confident about and believes in his unique voice/perspective.
like mercury is there and she's important, but she's not like. causing big waves? it's like his life direction, again, important, but i'm more intrigued by...
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mars conjunct pluto opposite his ascendant: oh boy!
this is his one big opposition and it's on the gemini-sagittarius axis (my fave, she's just fun and curious, she's not super dramatic or that difficult although she doesn't exactly make it easy to make... decisions... or get anything done?). however if we were worried about getting shit done, mars and pluto are here to scream. mars conjunct pluto is exactly as dramatic as sagittarius-gemini is not.
this is an exact conjunction and it's wild. anything pluto touches blows up in a way. it makes it intense and secretive and adds the planet to its portfolio of unconscious past life soul security demands.
lmao i just realized that red lights is fully this conjunction lmao oh no. i don't know if i can talk about this conjunction normally. it's very... ... nsfw.
sometimes pluto conjunct mars forces mars into the background and makes the person afraid to assert themselves, but i don't think that's exactly the vibe here, although it's similar. it looks to me like chan has a lot of rage and anger in him that, with his libra placements, he probably has a very difficult time acknowledging or facing. he'll easily internalize it and turn it inward and be a real asshole to himself, and also his temper will flare up randomly and he'll go for the kill shot when he meant to communicate like a normal person. he has a lot of strong desires, he also wants power, but he's gonna hide it and run from the reality there. he does have almost inhuman will, courage and drive tho, he can truly endure anything.
(idk i think he should be a little worried about his physical body, so many of his coping mechanisms depend on exercise/endurance and with pluto--transformation, security--in the sixth house i worry his health might force transformation? ur body can't carry all of ur unspoken shit my bud?)
gemini rising wants to seem very fun, very friendly, very cute, but with mars and pluto on his descendant chan is almost hiding or ignoring a huge part of himself--all those darker impulses which aren't going anywhere. my guy loves a taboo and (redacted redacted redacted redacted REDACTEDDDD). whatever, it's good for creativity and in sagittarius he has a good sense of humor about it.
jupiter: uno reverso???
damn chan really got #blessed here, a lot of that chart was really screaming Issues, Internalized Rage, Fear, Depression, etc, but jupiter really bounced up to be like "never mind haha. i mean yeah, true, but also whatever"
first of all jupiter is in its home house, the 9th--chan's on a Journey, he's eat pray loving, he's Listening and Learning--and it's in aquarius, so that belief system and personal philosophy is gonna be very open-minded, very science fiction, very predicting trends, very ahead of society.
jupiter conjunct his MC: this is what pulls jupiter up to the big boss list. anything conjunct your MC is at the top of your chart--people see it. people notice it about you. and goddamn are people just gonna give him stuff. and they always have. no wonder jyp was like This Is My Special Boy, like that is jupiter conjunct MC to a t.
(the public perception of chan is also gonna be a lot... cuter and more exuberant and fun than the actual man. not that he's not those things. just that the jupiter of his personality is really what people are noticing about him from the outside: his personal vision, his expansive side, all that. they are not looking at that prominent saturn as much, even if saturn is a bigger player)
jupiter trine the sun: another one where people are just gonna like you. for one thing they'll notice chan's good intentions and generosity--altho they will also notice his tendency to moralise and be a liiiiittle condescending--but his tendency towards bouncy optimism (at least outwardly) makes people want to follow him aquarius jupiter trine libra sun: two "we" signs in a big way, except aquarius is "we" like "humanity" and libra is "we" like "you and me", but they unite in a tendency to conflate the personal identity with the group identity--with jupiter and the sun at play it's like chan is able to bring people on board with his identity and personal vision (but he often presents an idealised version of himself who does not have needs, somehow) 9th house trine 5th house: basically a repeat of jupiter-sun, since the 5th house is the leo house--chan has a talent for using his personal philosophy/vision in creative works
our final big boss of the night, perhaps the ultimate big boss: aquarius uranus
chan's aquarius uranus is really talking to everybody. it has by far the most aspects of any planet. uranus has its hand in his ascendant and every planet except jupiter and neptune. with modern rulers aquarius is at home in uranus, and i'm coming around a little bit on modern rulership even if i think it tends to be less prominent than traditional. still:
aquarius uranus: original thought, technological progress, your box is dumb i'm not going in there uranus in the 9th house: he's gonna have an offbeat belief system--no chance he buys into korea's societal norms, or anyone's societal norms for that matter. he's not a conformist. trine his gemini ascendant: whooooo boy he is really not a conformist. when he's not in a Mood he's not judgmental at all, even when he's in a mood he has a real benevolent Ah, Humanity Should All Be Free to Pursue Happiness vibe. gemini couldn't give a shit about morals, and uranus and aquarius think morals are bourgeois. he has a talent for his own difference--some uranus people (like most of ateez, my weirdo darlings) have chips on their shoulders about being different, but chan with his easy trine is just happy to be himself. i mean a trine uranus isn't gonna change the world (unlike harder aspects like squares, who would be more driven to do so) but he is gonna set a good example just through his identity.
this is a fun side of chan! i like this!
square moon: mmmm ok about that chip on his shoulder. although it's not really about being different--it's more about he both wants to be stable and emotionally secure and also free and independent and he's soooooooo fucking stubborn (but he doesn't see it that way because he's Right, not stubborn). he's prone to feeling really itchy and stuck and then making big changes out of nowhere. also he's very intuitive but overly sensitive and when he's hurt he's gonna shut down completely and not tell the person what they did wrong. didn't he give someone the silent treatment? jisung? yeah that's uranus square moon energy. he has a lot of fear around his emotions and only lets himself feel in short sharp bursts. he feels hurt and he cuts out the person immediately without warning to protect himself--even if it's completely illogical he will dupe himself into believing it is very logical and correct, actually libra moon square aquarius uranus: yeah this looks like a "keep the peace even if it is unhealthy" v. "radical change out of nowhere the tower ass" argument, he'll bounce between the two extremes again. heyyy gemini rising i didn't even see u there!!
man. really haven't gotten into everything including his sun in libra (in its fall), his nodes (classic idol 5th-11th axis, soooo many of them have this), etc, but i've been working on this for so long!! aughhH!!
ok drumroll please, let's gather up his chart big players!! normally i would rank these, but i keep changing my mind.
aquarius uranus
aquarius jupiter
sagittarius mars-pluto conjunction
aries saturn
libra mercury (2nd to lastish)
libra moon (definitely last on this list)
tentatively i'm gonna put uranus-jupiter tied at 1, then mars-pluto then saturn then mercury. ugh i don't know though. they're all big players! chan in general has one of those spread-out charts--when you look at the ruler of each planet, he has what's called a "committee" tree
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where there isn't one or two final bosses, and the planets are all connected in one tree rather than being separate. you can see how chan's 3 top planets are sag mars, aquarius jupiter and aries saturn--they all work together and are super interconnected. he's not as single-minded as someone with a singular dispositor (ateez hongjoong has a singular final dispositor tree with his pisces jupiter) but also not as split or conflicted as someone who has split trees (ateez seonghwa has a planet in rulership tree with separate parts).
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anyway this has been really interesting! for someone with what seems at first glance to be a very unified chart (air moon, air sun, air rising) he has some interesting conflicting energies--altho i'm sure he sees himself as just an air person. i'm sure he is lowkey aware of that mars and pluto conjunction but i'd bet he really pretends he does not see it (except for in REDACTED REDACTED EXTREMELY REDACTED situations), and he truly cannot see his saturn at all (altho everyone else can!).
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kabutoden · 1 month ago
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aphids update
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since i started posting aphids, nearly the entire thing has been written. and i really want to see it complete!!
its especially a bummer because i wanted to put out each chapter in 1 month, which i almost managed to complete with the first chapter by focusing on the grind but not quite, burning out hard before completing it. ive had the pages inked for months now, they just need some touchups to be released. it’s just mostly cus I got work and work exhausting. yah know how it is.
i want everyone to know every couple of weeks i look at my aphids writing and comics WIPs and go WOW. GODDAMN. THIS SHIT GOOD. there have been a few changes and additions i've made in the past few months: some of them are just gags, while others are super valuable and i think these additions help with expanding the story. they aren't things i would have realized quickly. things that have been added include two raps, one by dave and slam poetry by karkat, but more importantly pacing improvements. so that’s cool
currently im working a temp job but im TEMPted (haha) to take some time off work and visit my family if they don’t keep me on. im considering taking some time between jobs to really make some progress on Aphids or my other projects. like finishing explaining bugstuck versions of all castes. maybe answering those asks too. i got some neato fantrolls to post i just spend forever explaining the characters whenever i wanna post. LAMMMEEE. ok bye -kabu
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elsa-fogen · 4 months ago
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Ok, Rosie headcanon for you!! Might be a slight AU but whatever lol
I like to imagine that Rosie is actually REALLY old. Died in the 1400s or something (maybe for being a suspected witch 👀) , and she just sort of kept up with the times until she found a period that suited her (getting there on that). This also ties into Cannibal Town/Colony name thing!!
Idk how much you know about American history (I know if I didn't live in this crazy country I'd know nothing by choice lol), but in the late 1500s Roanoke Colony was established where North Carolina is now. They struggled with supplies and relations with native people so the founder left to get supplies/help etc; when he came back 5 years later everyone had disappeared without a trace, no graves, bodies, only the word "CROATOAN" carved into a rock. It's a mystery nobody has solved since.
BUT.
WHAT IF.
They ran out of resources, right? What if food ran so low that people began to resort to cannibalism? And things were going so badly that some desperate person tried to summon a demon, anything to help them?
And Rosie, twisted and dark as she may be, took her own sort of sympathy on the poor, struggling colony of Roanoke, and took them all down to Hell as her own colony of souls: Cannibal Colony, leaving Roanoke empty without a trace of its inhabitants. From then on, she just sort of adopted any cannibals who fell into hell as part of her little town, so long as they assimilated and didn't cause trouble. She owns all their souls, yes, but they have some level of peace and security knowing she'll take care of them.
With the "updating culture" thing, I also headcanon that she liked to keep up with the times and stay current until sometime after slavery ended, a little before Alastor arrived (depression era) she didn't like where modern times were headed and just sort of...stopped progress, like a time capsule. Modern times started progressing too fast, and she didn't want everything to be forgotten in the rush to the future, especially the way the human world was looking with the depression. She did rename them to Cannibal Town eventually, since it was more than just her original Colony that gave her Overlord status.
I love Rosie 👁👄👁 sorry for the giant text block lol
P.S. Your art inspires me so much!! And your characterizations are *chef's kiss* I feel like your blog is consistently one I can come to to get canon-accurate character content without facing an onslaught of r********e (finally someone who can't stand it as much as me! Sending all the love 💓
oH WOW! This is really damn good and interesting headcanon! You almost convinced me to change mine to this (well, i like the idea of Rosie being SUSPECTED witch gshssh angssssst yessss). I realized that actually I don't have much that keeps me from just accepting this. Only 2 things
one is that she in her life was fighting for women's rights, and keeps doing it in hell, but i guess she still can even being older.
second one is more important. Rosie and Alastor are roughly same age (30-40 age gap is nothing in hell, were age gaps can be thousands of years) and this is one of the reasons they get along, i think.
Plus in my plot Rosie being a relatively young overlord plays significant role...
But as i said, you headcanon really cool! Maybe i'd use it for some new AU haha
P.S. Your art inspires me so much!! And your characterizations are *chef's kiss* I feel like your blog is consistently one I can come to to get canon-accurate character content without facing an onslaught of r********e (finally someone who can't stand it as much as me! Sending all the love 💓
GAHYHHHAFGS THANK YOU! I'm really happy to know that i'm not alone on this hate board hsbfsdhfj
Here you can be safe, never ever you'll see anything positive about this ship on my blog 😂 (no offence to those who likes it) Love you too 💖💖💖
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ilydeku · 4 months ago
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izuku loves to talk about you during interviews
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- anything and every topic it will ALWAYS be about you
- the question won't even be remotely related to you and still izukus answer will revolve around "y/n, my wife!!" <3
- oh, the glint in his eyes, the peaking smile when he speaks about you, lover boyyy
- the media knows he LOVE LOVES you, they think it's funny for this big, confident, mighty hero to be reduced to sap when it comes to you
- it's like his whole is personality is HIS WIFE
- the journalists lowkey get so SICK of him for this, they don't want to invite him anymore 😭
- but they kinda have to, due to to his status as #1
"Good evening everyone and welcome Hero Talk! Tonight we'll be staring someone you all know and love, single handedly the greatest hero of all time, Deku! Alright, Deku how are you tonight?"
"Feeling pretty good! This is one of my wife's favorite shows, so I'm even more grateful to be here. And how are you?"
"Oh, same old. Really, just living. Now, we wanted to ask you some fun questions. Let's start with this one. Why did you want to become a hero?"
"Wow, haha! That really brings be back to my youth. When I was kid, my biggest influence was All Might, and he miraculously became my mentor. He was a good hero, and a good man. I wanted to be just like him: fearless, persevering, saving people with I smile. I would beg my mom everyday to watch this video on the computer of him saving a bunch a people. I was really swayed by All Might. I wanted to become a hero to make an impact in the world. I wanted to save people with a smile too."
"That sounds really endearing, Deku. I remember All Might's reign. He wasn't number one on the top charts all those years for nothing. So, did you ever think you'd be standing as Japan's top hero?"
"Well, it was never really my goal to become number one. That was Kacchan's- Dynamight's. My dream was, like I said, to become a hero and save others. But I have to say, it really is a blessing. I'd like to thank my Mom, All Might, my friends, and especially my wife for who I've become. My Mom has really done a lot for me growing up: protecting, encourage, and just always caring for me. All Might has kinda been that father figure for me when my Dad was away. My friends have shown me what it's like to work together and really be part of a heart. And my wife? Haha...I can't thank her enough for all the times she's been right by my side, even before we were together. Nothing I can say or do will ever be enough to express how much she means to me."
"Mm. Quite the supportive group. Your wife sounds like quite the lady!"
"She is. She's wonderful."
"Moving on to the next question, do you use social media often?"
"Occasionally, yes?? My wife uses it regularly, posting about us when we go out and stuff. It's mostly for her family to see how she's doing. She handles most of my official accounts. She says it's to be more appealing to the public, and I guess to show that there's more to heroes on the inside?? I'm not really sure, but I trust her process. Although, I'd rather be appealing to her alone."
"The public will always interested in a hero's private life! Now, Deku, what is your ideal setting of relaxation?"
"My wife doesn't like places that are too crowded or noisy, so maybe a cozy day at the beach?- but early in the morning or in the evening when the crowds calm down. Maybe a movie theatre, but days after the movie is released so it's just us together. Actually, a lazy day at home together is great too! Cooking meals and watching a movie on the couch? Really, any place is relaxing if my wife is with me."
(am i questioning Deku's wife or Deku!?) "How scenic! Those sound very fitting for you!! How about any restaurants?"
"Not really. My wife really knows how to cook, it's amazing! I love her home-cooked meals, so there's no way I'd go out of my way to a restaurant. But if my wife is feeling it, I'll be sure to make reservations."
"(sigh)"
"(smiling warmly)"
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vulpixisananimal · 2 months ago
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"And you're absolutely, positively, one-hundred percent sure about this?" (Isabeau asked, he looked at you, concerned. He had worried about you all morning, helping you get ready for the day, checking for bruises, for anything wrong at all. But no, the only issue you had was the same issue you had yesterday.)
"I'm sure, absolutely, positively, one-hundred percent sure." (You nod. It was, it was the only place you could think to go.)
(The Favor Tree.)
(You were going to be useless in the house. Drag them all down, get them killed, fail over and over again if you just ran into that brick wall called the House of Change. No, no what you needed, was, some time alone.)
(It took some convincing, but eventually, everyone agreed. Isabeau would help you to the Favor Tree, sit you down, and you'd wait for them to return. You tried to subtelty give them tips, hints on how to get through the house without you, but it was hard without giving anything away.)
(They would be the heros this loop, you'd just be another frozen soul in Dormont, unless you looped back beforehand, naturally.)
"I-I could still carry you! I wouldn't mind! I can beat sadness AND help you through the house!" (Isa was practicly begging, but you couldn't go, not this time at least.)
(You chuckled, and smiled.) "Hey don't worry, I'll be waiting for you right where you leave me, okay?"
"Ha, haha. ." (The laugh was forced. Jokes wouldn't help warm the air here.)
(Eventually, the two of you ended up at the Favore Tree. It loomed above you; imposing, menacing, taunting. You kept your forced smile, Isabeaus arm holding you up. You still. Couldn't. Fell. It.)
". . . The Favor Tree's pretty cool, isn't it?" (Isabeau says.)
"Yeah it is. . ." (Ah you knew this line.)
"Glad you agree!"
(Make the pun. Make the pun it's the one thing you gotta do each time to stay sane just, make the pun.) "One could say it's a pretty. . ."
". . Uh huh?"
"Tree-mendous tree!" (You say, just like before.)
". . Heh, hehaha! Ha!" (Isabeau laughs, you laugh. This time at least it wasn't as forced but. . . You could still tell he wasn't happy with it. With your whole situation.)
(He doesn't reach for you. Good thing too, you couldn't step back either.)
"Any place you want to be set down, or. . ." (Isa asks)
"Oh uh, just that root over there." (You gesture with a nod. Isa helps you over and sits you down, leaning your back against the tree. He steps back. He was looking at you, his face was full of, pitty? Great, it was pitty.)
"And, you're absolutely, sure?"
"I'm sure, Isa, okay? I promise." (You keep smiling.) "See you after the day's saved, okay?"
". . . Okay, I-I'll, I'll see you. Later. I'll see you later. After we're back."
"You'll do great! Isa! Big buff guy Isabeau! You'll do great!"
"Yeah!!! It'll go great!!" (Isabeau finally smiled back. As forced as it was.)
(He waved, you smiled back, he walked away. You wait untill he's gone. A beat, two, three, four. . .)
(. . .)
(. . . . . . . .)
". . . . Wow Stardust! You've really caused quite the stir!" (And in an instant that familiar voice filled your ears. You turn your head and sure enough, Loop was there. Oh Loop. Reliable, wonderful, annoying as hell. They didnt have a mouth but those eyes were all they needed to grinn.) "You have Isabeau carting you around like royalty! My, lucky you!"
"Loop. . ." (Your breathing gets heavy.)
"Was it all to get more time with me, Stardust? You know you could have just snuck out~"
"Loop I, I can't-" (Your stomach hurts.)
"What, can't move?!?" (Loop huffed, looking away.) "Come on, Stardust! You went back in time! So what if the King snapped your spine, it's fine now!"
"But, it's not-" (Why didn't they believe you?)
"It's fine!! It has to be fine!!" (Their tone changes, angry, or-) "You changed time!! Whatever you did it doesn't matter now!! It gets, turned, back!!"
"THEN WHY CAN'T I DO ANYTHING?!?" (You yell, you yell and yell. You yell and cry.) "WHY CAN'T I FEEL ANYTHING?!? WHY CAN'T I MOVE?!?! WHY AM I JUST, SO, USELESS?!?!?!"
(Loop doesn't reply. You keep crying, you can't, you can't stop yourself.)
"I can't do anything!! I'm useless!!! A sack of rocks to be hauled around!! I can't do anything by myself, always needing help!!! Do you think I want that?!?"
"I can't move!! I CAN'T MOVE!!!! I can't check for traps!! I can't look for keys!! I can't fight I can't walk I can't eat I can't flip pages of a book I can't do ANYTHING!!!"
"We'll never make it out!!! We're STUCK here!!! AND IT'S ALL MY FAULT!!!"
(You were sobbing, you couldn't stop. You were stuck here. You couldn't move, you couldn't fight, walk, win, live, do anything. You'd never escape, you'd never get out.)
(You're doomed.)
(It's quiet. You don't know for how long it's quiet for. You sob, unable to stop, eye squeezed closed. Loop doesn't say anything. You hear the wind rustle the leaves of the Favor Tree. You feel the sun on your face.)
(You calm down, taking a few deep breaths, one, two, three, four, five, sex, seven. You're okay, you're fine, you're okay now, you're.)
(You're. Over. It.)
". . . . . . Siffrin, I. . ." (Loops voice. You don't open your eye.) ". . . . I'm sorry."
". . . It's fine."
"No! It's not fine!" (They huff.) "If- since it looks like you really are stuck like this, we need, a new plan."
". . ." (You sigh.)
"You won't be getting anywhere by moping Stardust~" (Loop giggles.) "Who knows! This could be some twisted blessing in disguise!"
"Yeah right. . ." (You roll your eye.)
". . . Well? Are you just going to sit there being sorry for yourself?"
"Sorry, let met just stand up and be sorry somewhere else." (You stick your tongue out.)
"Hah! Hahahaha!!" (Loop laughs, and claps their hands together.) "Well now that you're feeling better, how can I help you out on this wonderful new loop, Stardust?"
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fatkish · 1 month ago
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Y/n x Kimetsu no Yaiba
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(Y/n and Tanjiro are tied up in front of the Hashira at the trial)
Y/n: *wiggles their arms loose and frees them* haha! I’m free!
Goto: how did you get free?
Y/n: you really should have checked my pockets cause I’ve got…. *reaches into their pocket and pulls their hand out raising it into the air, stops to put their hand down to look at what’s in their hand*
Y/n: I’ve got a barnacle! *raises their hand in the air*
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(Y/n is hanging out with Zenitsu and they are trying to draw each other’s portraits)
Zenitsu: *holds up a decent drawing of y/n* here’s my drawing of you, y/n
Y/n: oh wow, that’s really good
Zenitsu: *blushes* you think so
Y/n: yup
Zenitsu: can I see your’s
Y/n: mmm… I think I’m gonna give up, I’m having a hard time
Zenitsu: oh, let me see
Y/n: *shows him a drawing of Zenitsu with a blurry face behind him* I’m having difficulties drawing the person behind you
Zenitsu: *screams and looks behind him* there’s no one there!
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(In the aftermath of a battle, y/n’s foot has been severed. They lay recovering in the butterfly estate)
Sanemi: I can’t believe you lost a foot
Y/n: I didn’t lose it
Sanemi: what are you talking about! You’re missing your goddamn right foot!
Y/n: no I’m not!
Sanemi: yes you are! Look! *pulls up blanket to show off y/n’s stump* see! No foot
Y/n: but it’s not gone…. It’s right here *pulls their severed foot out from under their shirt with a smile*
Sanemi: why the hell do you have it?
Y/n: well I couldn’t just leave a piece of me behind *rubs the severed foot*
Y/n: you want to touch it? *holds their severed foot out to Sanemi*
Sanemi: ah hell no!
——————————————————————————
(Giyuu is introducing y/n to the Hashiras)
Giyuu: *sees y/n and recognizes the look in their eyes* don’t do it
Y/n: *looking at Gyomei* well slap my ass and call me spanky, hello there handsome
Giyuu: what is wrong with you
——————————————————————————
(After the battle in the entertainment district)
Y/n: *running up to Tengen and his wives* Tengen! Hey Tengen!
Tengen: oh y/n
Y/n: *holding their hands behind their back* guess what I found
Tengen: my swords?
Y/n: your hand! *holds out Tengen’s severed hand* can I keep it? Or do you want it back?
Tengen: what am I going to do with it? Why do you want it?
Y/n: *shrugs*
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(Rengoku and Tengen are staring at y/n)
Tengen: what the hell is that
Y/n: *holding a giant lizard* it’s my new friend!
Rengoku: are you sure it’s not dangerous
Y/n: oh it’s fine…*gets bitten*
Y/n: *running around with the lizard biting them* he’s biting me! He’s biting me!
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(Y/n and Tengen are at Kyojuro’s house and have challenged him to drink a smoothie made from ingredients he picks while he’s blindfolded)
Y/n: *holding a pickle* yes or no Kyo?
Kyojuro: yes!
Y/n: *puts pickle in blender*
Tengen: *holding a jar of mayonnaise* yes or no?
Kyojuro: no
Y/n: *holding a jar of peanut butter* yes or no
Kyojuro: yes
Y/n: *adds a few spoonfuls of peanut butter to the blender*
Tengen: *holding a carrot* yes or no
Kyojuro: yes
Tengen: *puts carrot in blender*
Y/n: *holding a large spicy pepper* yes or no
Kyojuro: yes
Y/n: *drops pepper in blender*
Tengen: *holding an orange* yes or no
Kyojuro: yes
Tengen: *puts peeled orange in blender and turns it on*
Y/n: okay Kyo, you can remove the blindfold
Tengen: *hands Kyojuro the smoothie* bottoms up
Kyojuro: this does not look appetizing *takes a sip*
Kyojuro: why is it spicy? *takes another sip*
Kyojuro: i don’t think i like this *takes another sip*
Tengen: then why do you keep drinking it
Kyojuro: I have to be sure
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(Y/n has convinced all the Hashira to play the tortilla challenge. Everyone has taken a sip of water and is holding the water in their cheeks. They all stand in a circle holding a tortilla, they will each take turns slapping someone with the tortilla and whoever laughs loses. Kagaya and his family are overseeing the game.)
Kagaya: you may begin
Sanemi: *slaps Giyuu with a tortilla*
Giyuu: *No reaction*
Mitsuri: *tries not to laugh*
Obanai: *also slaps Giyuu with a tortilla*
Giyuu: *no reaction*
Mitsuri: *trying harder not to laugh*
Tengen: *smacks Kyojuro with tortilla*
Kyojuro: *smiles best he can*
Kyojuro: *smacks Sanemi with a tortilla*
Sanemi: *face angry and about to explode*
Y/n: *smiles best they can and smacks Sanemi with their tortilla*
Sanemi: *is so close to bursting*
Gyomei: *swings his tortilla at Tengen and misses making his tortilla go flying like a frisbee*
Mitsuri: *spits out her water as she laughs*
(Nichika and her sister have been giving Kagaya a play by play the entire time, relaying what happens)
Kagaya: Mitsuri is out
Mitsuri: *hands Gyomei her tortilla since his went flying*
Muichiro: *slaps Sanemi with his tortilla*
Sanemi: *trying to hard to hold it together*
Giyuu: *slaps Sanemi with his tortilla*
Sanemi: *spits his water out* alright that’s it! *begins trying to fight Giyuu*
Kagaya: remember children, this is a friendly game, and Sanemi is out
Shinobu: *smiles and tries to slap Tengen with her tortilla but she’s too short and slips*
Tengen: *spits out his water laughing*
Kagaya: Tengen is out
Obanai: *slaps Giyuu with his tortilla*
Giyuu: *doesn’t react*
Kyojuro: *slaps Gyomei with his tortilla*
Gyomei: *doesn’t react*
Y/n: *purposefully trips and slaps themselves with their tortilla*
Kyojuro: *bursts out laughing*
Shinobu: *chokes on her water from chuckling*
Kagaya: Shinobu and Kyojuro are out
Gyomei: *slaps Obanai with his tortilla whilst crying*
Obanai: *doesn’t react*
Muichiro: *slaps y/n with his tortilla*
Y/n: *doesn’t react*
Giyuu: *slaps Obanai with his tortilla*
Obanai: *is getting pissed*
Obanai: *slaps Giyuu back*
Giyuu: *doesn’t react*
Y/n: *slaps Muichiro with their tortilla*
Muichiro: *No reaction*
Gyomei: *tries to slap Muichiro with a tortilla but misses and accidentally slaps Giyuu in the face with his hand instead*
Muichiro: *spits his water out* what are we doing again?
Kagaya: muichiro is out
Giyuu: *slaps Gyomei with his tortilla*
Gyomei: *no reaction*
Obanai: *slaps y/n with his tortilla*
Y/n: *smiles and retaliates by slapping his ass with the tortilla*
Obanai: *spits his water out* is that even allowed?
Kagaya: technically there are no rules against it so Obanai is out
Gyomei: *slaps Giyuu with his tortilla*
Giyuu: *doesn’t react*
Giyuu: *slaps y/n with his tortilla*
Y/n: *doesn’t react*
Y/n: *slaps Gyomei with their tortilla*
Gyomei: *no reaction*
Gyomei: *goes to slap y/n with his tortilla but misses cause he underestimated their height and hits them with his wrist in their chest*
Y/n: *spits out their water as they clutch their stomach*
Giyuu: *spits out his water* y/n, are you okay?
Y/n: yup
Kagaya: and there we have it, Gyomei is the winner.
Gyomei: y/n are you sure you’re alright? I’m very sorry for hitting you, I didn’t mean to
Y/n: it’s fine
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