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onlymingyus · 2 years ago

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Holidate (Snowventeen Collab)

pairing; yoon jeonghan x afab reader

genre; smut, angst, fluff

warnings; fake boyfriend au, artist!jeonghan, stress about lying, unrealized feelings, conflict with family, reader’s parents are in the fic, joshua hong as a best friend, pretty heavy angst, eating and drinking mentioned, protected sex, oral (f receiving), handjob, fingering, light scratching, light breast play

svthub snowventeen collab master list - snowventeen tag list

w/c; 13k and some change

a/n; this will be my last snowventeen fic and for some reason as with most of my holiday fics this one got out of hand with length. I hope you enjoy it. thank you to @junkissed-replies, @duhnova, and @wonwussy for reading/proofreading.

“Why me?” Jeonghan’s brow raises in amusement giving you a full once over while you stand in front of him. He was one of your best friends but he really could be a dick when he wanted to be. “Because for one, you said you aren’t doing anything with your family for the holidays. Two, you are…classically attractive, and three, I need your help.”

When you call him attractive, Jeonghan’s smirk widens dramatically, leaning over the kitchen counter towards you lifting his hand to push your hair behind your ear causing you to take a breath. “You think I’m attractive?” Of course that would be the only part of the entire explanation he would have latched on to. Sighing loudly, you push his hand down causing Jeonghan to laugh and stand at his full height again.

“Will you go with me or not? I’m sure there will be someone there to torture, besides me.” Jeonghan runs his thumb along his bottom lip and gives you another once over lost in thought. A sigh escaping his lips when he nods causing you to smile melting his facade for a brief moment. You watch his face soften, his smile genuine until he clears his throat and glances down to his phone.

“I’m sure it will be fun and then you’ll owe me. I’m not sure how you’ll ever pay me back for this one though.” You sigh loudly at his words, lifting your shoulders in a dramatic shrug causing Jeonghan to laugh while he watches you. “I’ll buy you some paint or cook for you for like a week.” As much as he wanted to hold his over you for longer, Jeonghan couldn’t help the smile on his lips at your ideas of paying him back. They were both so genuine things he would enjoy from you but mostly just knowing that both would include your company.

You watch him nod, his lips pursed in thought causing his face to look somehow even more strikingly handsome. You found yourself more often than not wanting to smack the smug look off his face but you knew you never could. “Tell you what, I’ll keep those in the bank,” Jeonghan points at his head at the mention of the bank, his lips turning up in a smirk causing you to roll your eyes as he continues speaking. “and I’ll let you know what I decide. For now, gorgeous, you can call me boyfriend.” You really were going to regret this.

Your stomach was in knots by the time that you and Jeonghan pulled up outside of your family home. He had been a perfect gentleman and actually helpful most of the trip. Trying to help you stay calm, telling you he would make this easy. “We’ve been friends for years, Y/N. I know you better than you know yourself. I can play your boyfriend without a problem.” Then why was your brain screaming that your family would know you were lying?

This had all been so that you could stop the questions of when you were going to find a boyfriend, when you were going to get married, and most of all so you could stop the “well, you know your eggs are dying each and every day” conversations. For the past few years you were the center of attention for all the wrong reasons so this year you had taken it into your own hands to change the script.

Sliding out of the car, you swallow hard starting to turn towards the trunk of the Uber only to feel Jeonghan take your hand, hearing him tsk at you. “You are going to have to act like my girlfriend too. This is a two way street darling. So, though I don’t know who those people watching from the window are, I think it would be better if I carried in our bags, don’t you agree?”

Your eyes scan the front of the house seeing the face of your cousin, your mother, and one of your aunts watching you like a hawk. A large smile on your mother’s face while her hands gripped at the front of her dress trying to remain calm, you were so much like her. You had been nervous before, now you are terrified, your hands were sweating and Jeonghan could feel you trembling.

“Oh my god, they are gonna know I’m lying.” Jeonghan sighs at your words reaching up to push your hair from your forehead while the Uber driver sets the bags at his feet muttering a simple goodbye before the car pulls out of the driveway. “No they won’t. I won’t let this fail, when have you ever seen me fail anything?”

He had a point, he was good at everything. It was truly disgusting the more you thought about it. You found yourself instinctively leaning into Jeonghan’s hand making him smirk a bit, his own stomach doing flips but he was much better at hiding it. “Mhm, that’s what I thought. So just go with the flow and try to follow my lead. I’ll try to follow yours, okay?”

When you nod, Jeonghan smiles, his eyes glancing towards the window seeing even more people watching the two of you now. “Mm we have quite the audience. Don’t pull away…” You start to ask from what but Jeonghan leans in pressing his lips to yours letting them brush over yours so softly it takes your breath away. Shock sets in only once he pulls back his hand on your cheek covering your reaction from the onlookers, only a look of admiration on his face even as he wants to laugh at your wide eyes. “Couples kiss, you are going to have to get used to that, baby.”

“Oh my god, you’ve never kissed me before.” Jeonghan laughs, his thumb brushing along your cheek for a moment longer before he finally steps away to pick up both bags glancing back to wink at you. “Yeah, well I’ve never had a reason or occasion to kiss you before. Now let’s go in before they come out here. You have to introduce me to your family.”

You were still in shock walking slightly behind Jeonghan while taking the lead, making you bite the bullet and head towards the house. “You keep calling me pet names, you called me baby.” Jeonghan laughs, glancing over to you with a nod, “You are so observant today. I did call you baby because couples also use pet names. I thought it would be strange if we didn’t use them. You can call me anything you want, unless it’s something that would be obviously embarrassing. Y/N, take a deep breath, you look like you are going to pass out.”

His words are deaf in your ears when the front door opens, your mom’s voice cutting through the silence. “Y/N! Hi honey, you didn’t let us know you had landed and that you’d be bringing a guest.” You start to speak but Jeonghan can see how your lips barely seem to move so he takes over leaning to sit down the bags on the first step of the house, a bright smile on his lips when he offers your mother his hand.

“I’m Yoon Jeonghan, I’m afraid much of this is my fault, Mrs. Y/L/N. Y/N wanted to give you all a heads up but I thought it would be more fun if I was more of a surprise, a gift in a way. I know how important she is to you all, she has to be if she’s so important to me.” Your mother’s breath is shallow while she holds Jeonghan’s hand, his charming words cutting through her like a knife.

“Oh…it’s okay Jeonghan. I just, I’m afraid dear that I have only heard your name a few times from my daughter and with how you are speaking about her…” She lets the words trail off hoping that Jeonghan would fill in the blanks while her eyes fall on you, your cheeks burning as others stand in the doorway of the family home.

Jeonghan laughs moving to put his arm around your waist, his fingers pressing into your hip pulling you closer to him. “Again, my fault, I apologize. I hope you won’t hold that against your daughter or me, but if you are thinking that we are together you are correct. We have been for just under a year now.”

The two of you hadn’t discussed details of your dating life, that was hitting you now like a ton of bricks and you were incredibly grateful to Jeonghan for being so composed in coming up with a story on the spot. Glancing up at him you find yourself smiling softly making his throat tighten when his heart beats a bit faster.

Your mother’s voice cuts through you once again but you don’t look away from Jeonghan right away. “Oh! Oh my goodness, Y/N! He’s lovely, I wish you had told me. I don’t understand why you two have kept this so hush hush…”

Jeonghan grins, lifting his hand without thinking to brush over your cheek, making your mom coo out a sound of appreciation at how tender he appears with you even as he speaks. “I guess I just wanted to keep her to myself for a little while. No pressure to be anything but us.” You swallow hard nodding in agreement watching Jeonghan move to pick up the bags again. His eyes finding your mom once again letting her grab your hand pulling you closer to her.

“I’m so happy to see you with someone like this.” You laugh a bit out of nerves until you meet Jeonghan’s eyes and his smile. “I’m happy too, Mom.” Her laugh mirrors yours, her hand holding you tighter while pulling you up the stairs letting Jeonghan follow you both this time. “Okay let me get you both settled then you can introduce Jeonghan to everyone.”

The word ‘everyone’ echoed in your head all the way up the stairs and to your old bedroom where you stood still causing your mom to laugh. “Where is Jeonghan going to stay?” The laugh that escaped her lips caused you to jump slightly surprised only to feel Jeonghan behind you like a reliable rock. “Honey…I am not under any impression that if you two have been dating for around a year that you haven’t shared a room. He can stay with you, I don’t mind, besides we are tight on space. This is easiest.”

Jeonghan’s cheeks were warm this time, he had expected to have his own space away from you at least a night but he smiles at your mother leaning down to kiss the side of your head reassuringly. “This is perfect Mrs. Y/L/N. I’d rather be close to Y/N anyway.” You both watch her smile, a nod of her head when she pushes the door opening showing you the same bedroom you had used since a child. You find yourself happy you had taken down most of the embarrassing posters and changed out the bedding set a few years ago.

“Once you two are settled please come down. We are going to have drinks soon and like I said, you have to introduce your boyfriend to everyone. I know they are literally holding themselves back from climbing the stairs to get a look at him.” Another nervous laugh slips from your lips but you nod, leaning to kiss your mother’s cheek shutting the door with a small creaking sound.

Jeonghan watches you lean your forehead against the wood, his eyes curiously moving along your body while he drops the bags next to the bed and sits on it. “Y/N…she didn’t know. We are doing fine.” Your throat felt like it was closing up but you nod and glance back at Jeonghan furrowing your brows seeing him sitting on your bed. “Oh my god, how are we going to do this? You, sleeping in here, with me.”

A small sigh slips from Jeonghan’s lips, he didn’t see what the big deal was with sharing the bed but clearly it was making you freak out. Standing he glances around the room seeing a thick blanket picking it up showing it to you. “Just provide me with a pillow. I can sleep on the floor.” You felt horrible, the idea of him sleeping on the floor but at the same time it did make you calm down some. It seemed easier than sharing the bed with him.

Nodding you move further into the room while Jeonghan lays the blanket on the bed turning back towards you offering you his hand. “The others won’t be as easy as my mom. She’s easily charmed.” You watch a smirk spread over Jeonghan’s lips when he takes your hand running his thumb along the back of it lifting his brow.

“Well I’m incredibly charming, Y/N. You just keep up with the story in case we get separated. With that said, we probably need a firmer one, we didn’t really talk about that.” He watches you nod while obviously chewing on your cheek. “Okay, dating for just under a year. We’ve been friends for years, which is true. I asked you out for dinner, I’m a gentleman so that makes sense.”

When you roll your eyes Jeonghan laughs fighting the urge to lift his hand to brush over your cheek again. “Well I am, just ask your mom. So dinner, it became two then three dates and finally we just decided to become an item. You like that I paint…” You furrow your brows at Jeonghan’s words tilting your head.

“Yeah I do, so?” His fingers hold your thumb, stroking your skin gently without much thought, a laugh so smooth exiting his mouth it makes you have to hold back a shiver. “I’m just pointing out an easy point of conversation. I like how determined you are, smart, and kind…you were easy to fall in love with.”

Your brows furrow, you swallow hard finding it almost difficult to do so making your next words come out slightly strained. “Well your painting can’t be the only thing I like about you.” Jeonghan grins, raising his brow, lifting his free hand to gesture for you to continue. “Then tell me darling, what else do you love about me.”

The word love makes you pause, your mouth opening and closing one too many times making Jeonghan laugh. “God you are adorable…” When your hand connects with his chest, the smack weak but still getting your point across, Jeonghan continues to laugh, lifting both hands this time in defeat. “I…fine, I love that you are talented, your paintings, you are intelligent, charming, and deep down…and I mean way deep in your twisted little soul you are one of the sweetest people I’ve ever met.”

It was Jeonghan’s turn to swallow hard, his cheeks burning slightly while he laughed to hide his own feelings. “See, that wasn’t so hard. This will be easy as pie. Even I have to admit looking at us this all makes sense. So…we continue to go with the flow.”

Jeonghan’s words make you take in another shaky breath, something becoming far too common for you recently. His eyes are still moving over your face in thought until you finally nod your head and meet his eyes. “Yeah, it’ll be fine. Let me just freshen up a little bit and we can go downstairs.” Watching you move from him, Jeonghan bites at his bottom lip when you move into the ensuite bathroom. At least you two were lucky enough to have that extra space to yourselves which would make showering easier on this trip without drawing suspicions.

Behind closed doors you take a few steadying breaths looking at yourself in the mirror, the water running into the sink in front of you loud enough that you hoped Jeonghan wouldn’t hear your panicked sighs. You had always been more attracted to Jeonghan than you wanted to admit to yourself much less him, and now you were stuck in the same bedroom with him for close to a week. You knew you had put yourself into this predicament and yet it didn’t seem to help you feel any less panicked about it.

By the time you come out of the bathroom Jeonghan is sitting back on your bed looking at his phone, both bags on the dresser open. “You opened my bag?” Without looking up Jeonghan nods with a sound of acknowledgement. “In case you needed something before we headed down. I was going to look for your toiletries bag but I didn’t wanna overstep. Especially since you packed your lacy things on top.”

Your cheeks burn hotter than you thought they could, a scoff falling from your lips when you move over to your bag digging through things slightly to find your smaller bag taking it out putting it down harder than necessary. “What’s wrong Y/N? I didn’t mess with them. They are pretty, shame no one sees them.”

“Yoon Jeonghan…I said to torture someone besides me while we are here. Oh my god, please stop talking about my underwear and my sex life.” Jeonghan laughs under his breath, moving to stand, finding his way to stand behind you looking over your shoulder into the mirror. “Sorry, you make it too easy sometimes. I’ll be good, promise.”

You meet his eyes in the mirror while Jeonghan lifts his hand offering you his pinky as his promise. Your brows furrow but you lift your hand linking your pinky awkwardly with his not moving to turn around. Jeonghan’s hand slides along your hip, a smirk on his lips briefly until he pulls away with a sigh. “Waiting on you, baby. I’m ready to go meet the family.”

Most of the introductions had gone much like your mother’s until you had reached your cousin Patricia. Her eyes lingered just a little too long on Jeonghan for a woman who was already in a relationship, her smirk too knowing. “It’s just so funny to me that no one knew about you beforehand, Jeonghan. Y/N is really not great at keeping secrets. In fact she’s always been a little too loose-lipped for her own good, ever since we were kids.”

Your eyes fell on her left hand, she had been moving it more than she needed to trying to get you or Jeonghan one to say something about the ridiculously large diamond situated on her ring finger. Jeonghan laughs a bit strained, his fingers pressing into your side while he takes a deep breath into your hair trying to stay calm while dealing with the woman. “Mm, you smell so good.” At his words, your cheeks burn but a smile spreads across your cheeks at how genuine he seems even as you meet his eyes.

Patricia watches the interaction only to roll her eyes at the theatrics and clear her throat. “As I was saying…” Her sentence is cut short when Jeonghan looks back at your cousin with a sickeningly sweet smile on his lips that you had only seen when he was truly irritated. “That I am a well kept secret, Trish…we wanted it that way. I liked having her all to myself. No annoying phone calls from relatives…on either side asking when we’d take the next steps.”

“Mm right, and it’s Patricia. I’d prefer that, if you don’t mind.” Jeonghan just smiles, lowering his head in a small nod that you know meant he would call her Trish a few more times now knowing it bothered her. When Patricia lifts her hand obviously to push her hair behind her shoulder, a laugh slipping from her lips, Jeonghan sighs, noticing you giving her the attention she wanted.

You hadn’t meant to look at the ring again but she was throwing it in your face and the moment she noticed you looking Paticia gasped with such fake surprise you felt sick to your stomach. “Oh, yeah, oh my god Y/N look at this. Liam proposed last week, and I just had to say yes. He really is the most amazing man I’ve ever met in my entire life.”

Jeonghan watches you reluctantly congratulate her, your fingers brushing barely over hers to acknowledge the ring. “You can touch it, it’s 4 carats. Cost him a literal fortune but he said I was worth it and who am I to argue. “ Patricia’s words were starting to grate on Jeonghan’s brain, especially when he watched one of your aunts, assuming it was the woman’s mother approach and start to gush over the engagement to you.

“We are just overjoyed. We seriously expected you to be first Y/N. Your mother has honestly been disappointed every single year dear. Such a shame, but now since you seem to have a dashing young man…maybe he will make an honest woman out of you yet.” That seemed to be the straw that broke the camel’s back in Jeonghan’s head.

“I already have, or we are well on our way.” Your brows furrow heavily at Jeonghan’s words, the two women in front of you suddenly speechless, their eyes fixated on the man standing at your side. His eyes fall on your confused ones, you watch him smile, a look of confidence on his face. “Sorry baby, I know you wanted to wait but it is the holidays. Besides…I’d rather them all know you are going to be my wife.”

As if his words were a beacon in the room, your mother was at your side within seconds. Her hands grabbing your hands looking for a ring causing your cousin to laugh in disbelief. “She’s, well, she’s not even wearing a ring.” She had a point, you thought to yourself. This hadn’t been the plan, not even in the realm of the plan. This was so far off script that you were also speechless.

Jeonghan however shrugged, a gentle smile on his lips when he met Patricia’s eyes. “We didn’t want to rub our good fortune into the face of others. The holidays are supposed to be about family and coming together. That’s why Y/N wanted to wait but after meeting you all, this felt like the exact right time to let you all know.”

It seemed to be enough to silence your cousin for the time being, Jeonghan watched her take a step back allowing your mother to step in closer to you. Her excitement obviously keeps you and Jeonghan distracted until he feels a firm hand on his shoulder. His eyes find the hand before who it belongs to only for Jeonghan to swallow hard when he meets the eyes of your father.

“Could we have a talk, son?” Your eyes were now on your father and Jeonghan even when your mother told you he would be fine and to just stay with her. “Oh..yeah I know but, uh Daddy, be nice!” Your words barely reach the man’s ears but you hear a gruff sound that lets you know he heard you request. Jeonghan wrings his hands together, his nerves taking over him more than they had the entire night when he finds himself in a corner of the living room away from most of the guests.

“Um, sir…I feel like I should apologize for just springing this on everyone. I should have of course asked for permission be–” His words were cut short when Jeonghan watches the man smile, your father’s larger hand moving to gently slap at his cheek. “I appreciate that you considered it now. I have been watching you with her, Y/N looks happy. That’s all I need or want, Jeonghan. Don’t break my little girl’s heart, that’s what I wanted to tell you away from everyone else.”

Jeonghan stands perfectly still, the hand falling from his face while the man keeps his eyes fixed on him waiting for him to speak. “I–I won’t, I swear.” Now he felt like you had when the two of you had arrived. The man was going to know he was lying, not about perhaps breaking your heart but about it all. Swallowing hard, Jeonghan puts on a smile and lifts his hand to scratch at his eyebrow in thought.

“I believe you, and don’t keep any more of the details from us. I’m afraid my wife might lose her mind if you try, and I’ll lose mine in the process of that. I look forward to meeting your parents one day soon, hopefully.” Jeonghan holds back a groan at the idea of how he was going to turn this back around after he left here. He was going to break your mother’s heart but that was something he’d have to worry about next week.

“Uh, yes sir. I’m sure they would be very happy to meet you as well.”

At the end of the night you found yourself sitting on your bed, your hands tugging at your sleep shirt in an attempt to pull it further down your legs while Jeonghan made a makeshift bed on the floor near you. Reaching for the other pillow on your bed you offer it to him when he looks up from kneeling on the floor, his eyes lingering over your bareskin without much shame causing you to swallow hard.

“Jeonghan…” You watch him smile glancing away to put the pillow down muttering his apologies though it wasn’t your intention. “No, I was just going to say, the marriage thing? What the hell? We don’t even have a ring…that wasn’t the plan. That goes way beyond you pretending to be my boyfriend, don’t you think?”

Turning to lay down on the blanket, Jeonghan makes a face to the feeling of the hard floor against his back before letting out a small sigh. “I just got frustrated at your cousin, she’s a real bitch. You looked like a deer in the headlights when it came to her, so I lost it and it just kinda happened. I’ll get you a ring tomorrow.”

It was that simple? He could just get a ring tomorrow. When you scoff, Jeonghan glances up to you on the bed, a smile on his lips at your reaction. “What? Are you mad? Everyone seemed so happy about it. I mean except Trish.” Furrowing your brows you let out a breath moving to lay down on the bed looking up at the ceiling in the low light while Jeonghan’s eyes still remain on what he can see of you even as you pull the covers over your body.

“I’m not mad, I’m just worried. That was a huge jump and it’s going to be a huge disappointment later.” Jeonghan felt that same sinking feeling he had felt when talking with your father earlier. He hadn’t meant to hurt you, and to leave you with the clean up later. “Y/N…I can try to fix–” You speak over Jeonghan cutting him off causing him to smile, his teeth catching his bottom lip.

“However, it is nice to watch Patricia not be the center of attention and get what she wants for once.” Turning on your side, you look at Jeonghan, your eyes moving across his face until he notices meeting your eyes causing him to laugh. “Then we will let you have your moment, babe.”

Shaking your head, you tuck your chin into the covers with a half surprised sound trying to get comfortable when Jeonghan calls you another pet name. “No one is here to hear you call me babe.” A smile still on his face, Jeonghan shrugs, turning his face back towards the ceiling letting a soft breath slip from his lips. “No, but I’m just letting you get used to hearing it.”

The sound of the knock at the door didn’t seem real at first. You whine not wanting to wait up, turning your face into the pillow you mutter in your sleep but then hear your mother’s voice telling you that she has breakfast in bed for you and your fiancé. “Huh?”

“I have some breakfast for you honey. Are you decent? Unlock the door and I’ll bring it in.” Panic sets in when you glance to the floor to see a still sleeping Jeonghan. Sliding out of the bed you kneel beside him and put your hand over his mouth speaking in whispers when he wakes up shocked to see you leaning over him. “My mom is here with breakfast. Get in the fucking bed!”

Jeonghan shakes his head trying to understand what is happening but another knock and the impatience in your mother’s voice sends him into a similar panic as you get him moving. You watch him move around your bed, the pillow back in its original place, his legs under the covers while you throw the blanket over your comforter trying to make it look as if the two of you had been using it for extra warmth.

“Mom, I’m coming!” Making sure Jeonghan was settled, you see him nod before you open the door and offer her a smile, your fingers pulling at your nightshirt similar to the night before when you had tried to hide your legs from Jeonghan. “You didn’t have to bring us breakfast. We could have come down to eat…”

“I know honey, but it’s already after 9 and you hadn’t come down yet so I figured I would just bring it up. I assumed the two of you were up late…being young.” You grimace at her connotation causing her to laugh while she approaches the bed, her smile on full display for Jeonghan. When he leans to take the tray of food and coffee from her, your mother coos in appreciation glancing back at you happily. “I adore him, he’s such a gentleman. Do you two have plans today?”

You start to speak, but Jeonghan is quicker with a smile on his face. “Mm yes, Y/N has promised to take me into town. Show me around a little bit, I hope you don’t mind Mrs. Y/L/N. “ Your mom laughs giddy with excitement, shaking her head with a hand on her chest. “I don’t mind at all but please Jeonghan, you are literally part of the family now. Call me Mom, I insist.”

Jeonghan glances at you then nods, clearing his throat while moving the tray so you can sit back down on the bed next to him. “Of course…Mom. I’ll be sure to get her back well before dinner.” The two of you watch your mother fuss over you for a moment longer before she finally leaves the room shutting the door with a small squeak leaving you both in silence.

“That was too close of a call. We can’t take that long to answer the door again…” Jeonghan nods in agreement, stabbing a fork into some scrambled eggs lifting them towards you, surprising you when he offers you the first bite of food. Watching you take the food he smiles a bit and shrugs. “You’ll just have to share your bed with your future husband.”

Walking around downtown in your hometown felt different this year. It always felt a little strange after being gone for a few months but this year it was like seeing it through different eyes. Jeonghan had let you point out a few stores to him, he had commented on how quant it all felt in comparison to where he had grown up and where the two of you lived now.

Now you were sitting outside of a store, a bag at your feet and a drink in your hand while you waited for Jeonghan to finish his errand. You had an idea of what he was up to but if you thought too much about it your stomach began to feel twisted up with nerves. It wasn’t real but it was terrifying how quickly you had to begin reminding yourself of that.

Jeonghan thanked the woman at the counter reaching out to take the small bag containing a velvet box. It had taken him far too long to decide on a ring, especially for a relationship that wasn’t real. His brain just couldn’t seem to tell his heart the same as he slipped the bag into his jacket pocket and headed out onto the sidewalk turning back up to where he had left you.

You were breathtaking, just sitting on a bench, the sun on your skin and in your hair. Jeonghan smiled to himself watching you for just a moment longer than he probably should have while you fidgeted with your phone almost seemingly out of nerves before he felt his own phone go off in his pocket. You had obviously sent him a text message and he couldn’t blame you. He had taken so long on his task but he didn’t take his phone out instead he pushed forward simply saying your name causing you to look up with a smile spreading over your pretty face when you saw him.

“I’m really sorry, I know that took me forever. Oh you went shopping too? What did you get?” Jeonghan glanced at the larger bag on the ground next to your feet with curiosity. “Uh I’ll show you when we get back to the house…I sent you a text just a minute ago. I was just getting worried about you. I know you don’t know this area.”

You had been worried about him, Jeonghan’s chest tightened slightly but he managed to keep a straight face putting on a slight smirk. “I found you didn’t I?” When you nod, Jeonghan sits beside you reaching for your drink, taking a sip of the coffee with a pleased sound even as you stare at him in disbelief.

“What? What is that look for? Couples share drinks, darling.” Jeonghan watches you shake your head, your head lowering trying to hide an amused smile giving him time to take out the small bag removing the box. “Mm, Y/N?” Hearing your name you think Jeonghan wants you to take your drink back but when you go to reach for it you find a velvet box in his hand instead, making you lose not only your train of thought but also your breath.

Sensing your panic, Jeonghan scoots closer taking your left hand a laugh under his breath. “Don’t make it a big deal. You might hate it anyway…” You doubted it very much but yet you couldn’t find the words to come up with a witty comeback while you watched him open the box. Your eyes move over the ring, a pear shaped diamond, the band containing more small diamonds that caught the sun in an almost blinding way.

“I mean, if you really do hate it…the lady said I could exchange it within 48 hours–” Without thinking you move your left hand from his once the ring was settled in place to place your palm against Jeonghan’s cheek. Your lips brush against his gently taking his breath away this time. When it clicks what you’ve done, the apologies start under your breath but Jeonghan laughs, shaking his head.

“Why are you sorry? Couples kiss, especially engaged ones.” All you could think was there was no one here to watch the two of you kiss. There was no reason for you to have done it but his lips were back on yours, his hand pulling you closer by the back of your neck deepening the kiss further. You feel your chest tightening knowing you should pull away and remind both of you that this wasn’t real but it felt too nice to just give into the moment.

Jeonghan smiles against your lips when you don’t pull away. His stomach flips with excitement because though he knows he should pull away he doesn’t want to. He had found himself wanting to get closer to you before this entire trip and situation but he had never known how to approach it. He had been afraid to ruin what to him seemed like the perfect friendship.

When Jeonghan’s tongue glides along yours for the first time, that is when your brain fires off a panic, a small whine slipping from your lips. Jeonghan sighs against your lips leaning his forehead against yours nodding. “Sorry…that was too much.” You wanted to tell him it wasn’t, that you were just afraid of what this all meant or what it could mean but instead you only nod.

“I promised your mom we would be back in time for dinner. I need to keep that promise.”

You found yourself surprised how with even the weight of an expensive ring on your finger, your mother fawning over you, Jeonghan caused your nerves to calm with a single look. Dinner was much more simple with less family over though you knew that wouldn’t last in the days to come. More family would be back for dinners and holiday celebrations but you could take what calm you could get. Especially if that meant time away from your aunt and cousin.

After dinner Jeonghan had been able to help you slip away without much trouble using his charm, something you were actually beginning to enjoy. Maybe you could get used to being around him more. No, that wasn’t a thought you needed in your mind, no matter how easy he was making this.

Watching him from the bed you find yourself smiling to yourself before you remember the bag you had brought home from the shopping trip now sitting in the arm chair in the corner of the room. “Oh! Jeonghan, I almost forgot.” Your voice is almost unexpected, especially with how excited you sounded saying his name, Jeonghan jumps slightly laughing under his breath when he turns to watch you crawling over the bed, your shirt riding up your legs.

Jeonghan finds himself sucking in a breath to suppress a soft groan to the image, the look of your thighs on display like this was not something he had thought he would see but he had often imagined them. “What…uh, what did you forget?” You glance over at his stuttered words, a smile on your lips when you drag the large bag on to the bed and pat next to it for him to join you.

“I bought you a present, ya know…since I owe you for all of this.” Moving towards the bed Jeonghan takes a breath, trying to keep his eyes from your legs and instead on your face and the bag once you start to take out the art supplies making his heart melt. “You didn’t seem to bring any. You are always painting back home…I thought you might miss it while we are here. I don’t think they aren’t like fantastic , but it’s something to play with.”

Sitting on the bed Jeonghan takes the brushes from your hands letting his fingers slip over yours making you shiver slightly. You meet his eyes briefly before clearing your throat returning to your task taking out a few different sized canvases, some tubes of paint, and pencils. “I know there are more things you use, and normally you’d choose oil but the lady at the store said for travel, gouache would be easier for little projects.”

You really had thought about everything, Jeonghan smiled shaking his head taking a tube of the paint into his hands looking it over. “This is wonderful, babe. Thank you…seriously.” Your stomach tightens at the pet name and how it flows off his lips even with no one watching the two of you. When you reply with a meek, “You’re welcome” Jeonghan looks up with a laugh tilting his head. “Are you okay?”

Nodding you move from your knees to pull at your nightshirt trying to cover your skin once again. “Uh yeah, no I’m fine. Just a little tired…we had a busy day.” Jeonghan’s eyes fall on your hands fussing with the front of your shirt much like your mom seemed to do with her dresses or shirt when she was lost in thought. A smile on his lips even when he nods moving to stand moving the art supplies from the bed sitting them to the side.

“Then we should call it a night. Tomorrow is going to be another busy day, or evening I suppose. Your dad was telling me that the family is coming back over for dinner.” You nod moving under the covers, your heart beating fast while you watch Jeonghan move around the bed. His eyes catching yours and how nervous you clearly were.

“I promise I’ll be a good boy. I’ll keep my hands to myself and everything.” You couldn’t help but to laugh at Jeonghan’s words, feeling the bed sink down very slightly under his weight. A small happy sigh leaving his lips at the difference between the floor and the hard floor hitting him like a train. “God, your bed is comfortable.”

You feel a bit of guilt watching him turn on his side, his face nuzzling into the pillow making you smile slightly when he allows himself to get comfortable. You knew this had to be better than the floor, you couldn’t imagine how much his back must hurt with just a blanket to lay on. “I’m sorry Jeonghan.”

A sound of tired confusion leaves his lips, Jeonghan’s eyes opening to look at you laying on your side looking at him. The sight of you like this once again taking his breath away more than he had anticipated. “Why are you sorry?” He watches you shrug slightly clearly thinking too hard with how your brows pinch together.

“I shouldn’t have made you sleep on the floor in the first place. We are both adults, that was incredibly childish of me. I just…get more nervous around you than I probably should.” Jeonghan grins, his brow raising in curiosity. He wanted to press you and get to the bottom of why you were nervous around him but he felt like he already knew the answer, he just wished you’d say it. “Mm, well don’t be so worried about things. They say things happen for a reason right?”

Rolling your eyes, you laugh and turn on your back causing Jeonghan to stifle his own laugh by biting his lips. God you were so pretty even in a dark room, he had you in a bed and all he wanted to do was kiss you again but he had made a promise. “Goodnight Jeonghan.” Your voice cuts through the silence and his thoughts, Jeonghan makes a sound nodding his head a soft, “Goodnight” muttered into the night.

Jeonghan had woken up in the bed alone, he had been a bit sad about that but he wasn’t upset about how much better his back felt. He could hear the sounds of your family downstairs but he also knew there was no rush to go down. He wanted to give you time with them alone, he owed that to you. He had been on your heels almost the entire time since the two of you had walked in the front door.

Taking his time, Jeonghan took out the bag of art supplies you had gotten for him, unwrapping each one with extreme care. A smile on his lips while he balanced his phone on his shoulder letting it ring while he waited for Joshua Hong to pick up on the other end. It had been a few days since he had really talked to any of his other friends, including his best friend, and a lot had happened.

“Realize there is a time difference you, asshole.” Jeonghan laughs hearing the tired voice of his best friend, shrugging while he shifts in the floor using one of the smallest canvases as a paint pallet to hold a few different colors while he balances a larger canvas against his leg. “Morning to you too, Sunshine. I need to talk to you so get your ass up, it’s not that early. You are just lazy.”

Joshua groans, lifting his phone from his ear making a face realizing that Jeonghan was right. It was early morning but it wasn’t so early he could make too much of an argument. “I’m not lazy, I was out late having fun. You remember what that is like? Going out trying to get laid? Instead of playing boyfriend?”

Jeonghan rolls his eyes, his focus split between the painting he was working on and the teasing coming from the phone. “I’m playing fiancé actually…” Hearing this development Joshua sits up in his bed rubbing his eyes as if that would change what he had heard. “Pardon me? Who’s fucking idea was that?”

“Uh, mine actually. It was kind of an accident. Well not really but I’m not sure how to explain it. I was annoyed with her cousin. She’s such a bitch, trying to make Y/N feel like shit. I was tired of it so I just kinda said we were already engaged.” Jeonghan scoffed, hearing the laugh from the phone while Joshua tried to process what he had just been told.

Adjusting the phone on his shoulder, Jeonghan lifts his hand holding the paintbrush, accidentally smearing the blue paint on his cheek. “Did you tell her that you’re in love with her too during this accidental proposal?” Joshua’s words strung but Jeonghan scoffed again, rinsing his brush out more vigorously than necessary.

“I’m not in love with her, it was a crush…and I’m helping a friend. Don’t make this something awkward.” Hearing the sounds of painting, something Joshua was very accustomed to being friends with Jeonghan for so long, he raised a brow leaning forward on his bed. “Okay, did you take painting things with you on this trip? Because that is lame as fuck. Spend time with your girlfriend, I’m sorry your fiancée. And two, sure friends travel across the country to help each other and propose on accident all the time.”

When yet another scoff slips from his mouth, Jeonghan sits up looking at his works thus far before dipping into the yellow paint making a face at Joshua’s words. “No, I didn't travel with painting supplies. Y/N bought me some yesterday, when I was buying her a ring actually. As for traveling across the country, all that bullshit you just said, I’d do it for you so yes for friends, I’d do a lot.”

Joshua laughs in disbelief hearing that Jeonghan had bought you a ring but his words make his laugh fall short. “Ugh, I’d rather you didn’t. You seem perfectly happy in your relationship Hannie.” The cutesy version of Jeonghan’s name coming out of Joshua’s mouth like a taunt. “Are you that jealous, Shua? Did you want me to propose to you by accident first?”

Jeonghan laughs hearing Joshua’s complaints about how stupid he is and how he’s stuck his foot in it this time. “Yeah…I fucking know, but I’ll figure it out. Honestly it’s not bad, I…nevermind.” Joshua smirks a bit when Jeonghan stops himself from admitting anything though he wasn’t an idiot. He had known for a long time how Jeonghan felt about you even if Jeonghan himself was too afraid to admit it.

“Right, well you two enjoy the honeymoon and call me later.” Jeonghan wanted to come back with some witty comeback, something to make Joshua eat his words but the sound of the door opening behind him caused him to stop. “Uh yeah we will and I’ll do that. See ya.”

You smile seeing Jeonghan sitting in the middle of the floor, paint on his cheeks, nose, and neck. It made you happy to see him using the supplies because you knew how important it was to him. Jeonghan watches your eyes move over him and then the painting, the sound of the door closing behind you when you step further into the room.

“It’s so pretty Jeonghan. I was afraid I hadn’t gotten you enough colors to really make anything. I should have known you could make pretty much anything look good.” Jeonghan grins a bit shyly at your attention especially after his conversation with Joshua. You watch as he scratches the back of his neck only managing to smear more paint on to his skin causing you to laugh.

“Jeonghan, baby…you have paint all over you.” Raising a brow, Jeonghan feels his cheeks burn hearing you call him a pet name for the first time. Even if you were using it to tease him slightly. Leaning down you use your fingers to push at the paint on his cheek, your eyes meeting his making you shy now. The look of adoration in his eyes before he lifts his brush pushing it against your jaw playfully.

“Now you do too.” Jeonghan watches you gasp softly the feeling of the cold paint on your skin, he drags the brush along your neck raising his brow when you don’t pull away automatically. The sound of your breath hitching in your throat when Jeonghan puts the brush to the side reaching up to smear the paint along your skin with his thumb, a small laugh on his lips.

“I really want to kiss you.” Your hand slides to his forearm, your fingers pressing against his skin making Jeonghan take a breath, his eyes moving across your face landing on your lips when you finally speak. “No one is here to see it.” You watch a smile spread across his face, Jeonghan shakes his head leaning up to close the space speaking against your lips. “I know.”

Your mother seemed to notice a difference between you and Jeonghan. How he would reach out to hold your hand, lean over to kiss your cheek more often, and mostly how you couldn’t stop looking at him. She hadn’t doubted your affection for the man before but now it was so clear to see that she had to keep herself from staring at the two of you the entire dinner.

On the other side of the table, Patricia had only shown up with her mother. Liam had been called away on business, which seemed to be a usual occurrence for him. You had to admit you felt bad for her though at the moment you couldn’t find yourself caring that much especially when she was still doing her best to try to ruin your “moment”.

“The ring is cute, a bit small. The clarity seems a bit lackluster. You know Liam went to New York to get mine…” Jeonghan laughs softly against your shoulder before pressing a kiss to it. You can hear him barely mutter, “this bitch is getting on my last nerve” before he glances over to your cousin with a sigh. “New York you say? That’s fascinating, Trish.”

She watches as Jeonghan slides his hand delicately along yours, the ring catching the light, nothing wrong with it at all, in fact if put beside hers there was much left to be desired in comparison. Jeonghan had clearly put thought into your ring, not only to make sure it was nice but also about how it would look on your finger. “Not to brag but there’s nothing but clarity to this ring. It’s a French cut pavé diamond, 4.28 carats to be exact, vvs clarity grade. What did you say yours was again?”

Having not expected Jeonghan to have all the details of your ring and for it to be that nice, Patricia simply mutters her first name trying to remind him not to shorten it once again but Jeonghan smiles leaning to kiss your cheek again. “Anyway, the most important thing is how beautiful it looks on Y/N. I just wanted something that could come close to matching how stunning she is.”

You hear Patricia scoff then her mother’s hushed voice telling her to calm down. Your eyes finding your mother’s amused glance before she lowers her own trying not to laugh. Jeonghan grins against your hair muttering his apologies for taking it too far only to feel you shake your head. “Don’t apologize. I’ve never seen her crumble so fast. She’s furious. Thank you for letting me feel like I’m special for once.”

Jeonghan’s smile fades slightly, lifting his hand to brush his knuckles against your cheek. All he could think was how much of a shame it was that you had to only feel that now. “I’ll try to make sure you feel like this more often, darling.”

You listened to the sound of the shower running from the bed, a book on your lap though you hadn’t read a single word. Your eyes looking over the diamond on your hand remembering all that Jeonghan had said about it and you the past few days. All that had happened the past few days. It felt like a whirlwind and as if you had been watching a movie. Like you were watching your life from the outside in.

Furrowing your brows, you sigh leaning your head back against the headboard not really noticing the sound of the shower cutting off or the sound of the door creaking open. Jeonghan watches you, shorts low on his hips, his chest still damp, a towel in his hand lifting it to his blonde hair to push it through catching some falling droplets.

You once again were taking away his breath by doing nothing. You had said you were going to read after your own shower. He hadn’t wanted to disturb you, give you some time to yourself, but now here you were, the book on your lap, but you were running your fingertips over your ring. It made Jeonghan’s chest tighten, his heart beat faster.

Jeonghan tosses the towel gently into the hamper, his eyes finding his now dried painting, a woman draped across a bed, she looked suspiciously like you but you hadn’t commented on it. His lips turned up in a slight smile when you made a sound of acknowledgement realizing he was in the room with you once again.

Your eyes travel over his bare back, the light from the lamps catching some stray water he hadn’t caught with his towel that made you want to run your hands over his skin to push it away, but you didn’t dare move or speak. Jeonghan turned back towards the bed, his eyes much less shy than they had been before when it came to you in this room.

He let them skirt over your leg on the outside of the comforter, up to the nightgown you had chosen to wear tonight instead of an old loose shirt. A smile pushing up at the corner of his lips when he walked around the bed crawling on to it to take the book off your lap closing it even when you start to complain. “You weren’t even reading it.”

“I might have been…besides, why did you take it?” You were asking silly questions and you both knew that. Jeonghan’s hand slides along your side causing your brows to furrow, your body instinctively sliding down in the bed slightly. “Jeonghan…we can’t. This isn’t real, it will ruin our friendship.”

Jeonghan furrows his brows, shaking his head, he would never make you do anything you didn’t want to do. Stopping, his hand resting over your hips, Jeonghan glances up letting his nose brush against your, his wet hair dripping still on to your skin. “We can but if you don’t want this, just say it. I’m tired of pretending. You say it isn’t real?”

A whine escapes your lips, your hips lifting towards him, your hand gripping his forearm as if you are trying to keep him from moving from you. His words biting into you, his lips hovering centimeters from yours for the taking. When you press your lips to his, Jeonghan takes that as his signal to continue, his leg moving between yours while his tongue slips into your mouth with a small groan.

You barely realize you are whining when Jeonghan pulls back, a smile on his lips while he shakes his head. “It feels pretty fucking real to me baby.” You didn’t speak because you weren’t sure you could trust yourself not to give away too much. The feeling of how you should run is so present and yet all you could do was pull him back to your waiting mouth.

Jeonghan hisses against your lips when you lift your hips brushing your leg against his now hard cock pressing against his shorts. His forehead resting against yours, Jeonghan’s hand drags your nightgown upwards exposing more of your skin to him. His eyes follow his hand only for him to groan your name when he sees some of the lace on your skin that he had teased you about at the beginning of the trip.

“God you are so fucking pretty. Can I take this off?” You nod, your eyes closed tightly, almost afraid to look at Jeonghan. You feel his mouth against your neck causing you to moan his name while his hands pull at the silk, his thumbs grazing your soft skin. Jeonghan only leans back when he has to pull the gown over your head causing him to gasp out a groan seeing you like this for the first time.

When you whimper out his name in a soft moan feeling the air on your breast, your nipples hardening, Jeonghan smirks slightly leaning you back on the bed. “Open your eyes, baby. Look at me…please?” You arch your back pushing your breast towards his touch, his slender fingers tracing your nipples until you finally do open your eyes meeting his waiting gaze. “I’m gonna love you if you’ll let me.”

His words cause your skin to burn, Jeonghan can feel how warm you become, your thighs closing around his leg making him smile. “Please?” One word, a soft beg slipping out of your lips is almost enough to drive Jeonghan crazy. He wasn’t sure he’d ever make you beg, no matter how pretty you sounded doing it. He wanted to give you everything.

The feeling of your fingers running through his damp hair, the tug of the ring causes Jeonghan to groan, his lips pressing to the top of your chest before he works his way lower. His eyes glancing up at you at every small sound falling from your lips. When his tongue laps around your nipple, you lift your hand to bite at the meat of your thumb, a groan from his mouth causing a vibration to radiate through your skin.

Jeonghan lifts his head to take a breath, shaking his head to the sight in front of him. The way your chest was rising and falling, the way your lips looked around your hand. Your eyes had closed again but Jeonghan knew you could feel where he was and where he was going. You whine out when you feel his mouth near your belly button, his fingers twisting the band of your panties around them slowly working them down your hips.

It had been so long since you had been with anyone, and even longer since anyone had taken the time to really appreciate you like Jeonghan was. His soft lips brushing over every inch of your stomach and hips while he helped you lift your hips, pulling the lace along your legs. You open your eyes again when you feel him sit up, hearing him groan and mutter under his breath.

Jeonghan runs his hand over his mouth, dropping your panties behind him with the other. “I know I wanted to see you in the lace but this is so much better. Holy fuck, baby…” You start to speak though you aren’t sure what you were even going to say when you feel Jeonghan’s hand run along your inner thigh towards your center.

You were so wet, Jeonghan could see that but he had to feel it, taste you. Watching Jeonghan move on the bed, you whine at the loss of him but it’s quickly replaced with wonder while you watch him take off his shorts allowing you to see him for the first time. Jeonghan watches you swallow hard, a bit of pride taking over him. While he knew he wasn’t the biggest in the world, he didn’t have any reason to complain.

Watching him run his hand over his cock, you slowly let your eyes move back to his finding him watching you so intently. Jeonghan moves towards the chair where his jeans lay discarded to take out his wallet and a single condom making you laugh for the first time in a while. “Hey, it’s not funny. I’m just prepared…”

Jeonghan tosses the silver square onto the bed near you before he is moving back towards you himself. You reach out to touch him, your hands running over his shoulders causing Jeonghan to shiver, a smile on his lips when they press to skin once again. Feeling his fingers brush between your legs, you gasp in slight surprise arching off the bed. “Are you okay?”

Nodding you meet Jeonghan’s eyes, a smile on your lips, his fingers resting against your thigh just to make sure. “I..yeah, it’s just been a long time and I am nervous.” Jeonghan smiles, nodding in understanding. His lips meet yours gently so he can mutter against them between kisses. “I’ve got you. I’d never hurt you, you just tell me if you want me to stop or if you really like something.”

Jeonghan’s lips claim yours even while you nod, his fingers creating a v to rub along your wet folds separating them causing you to pull back from the kiss leaning your head back. Given access to your neck, he doesn’t waste the opportunity to explore your skin there, his tongue gliding along your skin up to your ear while his middle finger circles your entrance.

When Jeonghan feels your nails press into his skin, he takes that as you having had enough of his teasing, you moan so sweetly to the feeling of his finger pushing into you that his cock twitches. Your brain is on fire with feeling overwhelmed and aroused when Jeonghan’s shaft rubs against your thigh, his pre-cum smearing across your skin you can’t help but to reach between your bodies to wrap your fingers around him letting him slowly thrust into your hand.

With a choke groan against your throat, Jeonghan brows furrow tightly to your touch. The way your soft hand feels around his cock, if it were possible to be any harder he was sure he would have been in that moment. Your warm breath against the side of his head, Jeonghan has to reach to take your hand from him afraid you will cause him to cum too soon. “Too good baby, fuck. Scoot down in bed for me?”

You nod and Jeonghan slides back helping you to move further down into the bed, his hands sliding along your legs to push them apart so he can slide between them. “God there is so much I want to do with you.” His words cause you to shiver, his hair beginning to air dry tickling your skin while he works kisses back down your body. Jeonghan’s right hand moving to pull your calf onto his shoulder, his eyes meeting you once more before you feel his tongue run along your slit.

“Fuck, Jeonghan…” The words were so soft, a whine on your breath, Jeonghan felt like his head was floating hearing you whining for him. The taste of you on his tongue driving him to push his face in closer to you using his free hand to separate your folds giving him access to your clit. When his lips wrap around it, a tiny bit of pressure as he sucks, you squirm trying to close your thighs but find it impossible without squeezing his head between your legs.

Jeonghan grins against your pussy, groans of appreciation, muttering how fucking good you are when he presses his finger back into you, making you gasp his name. Your fingers digging into the bedding under you and his hair between your legs, pulling just enough to make him groan a bit louder. “Gonna…oh god…”

You were doing your best to stay quiet, Jeonghan didn’t know why that was turning him on even more, spurring him on to push you harder in a way. But when he knows you are about to cum for the first time, Jeonghan groans, nodding against you, adding a second finger feeling you stretch around them right before the coil snaps causing you to gasp out the most erotic sound he had ever experienced.

Your fingers shaking against his scalp from how intense your first orgasm felt, you only loosen your grip when Jeonghan moves to slide up your body, his lips finding yours again. You moan to the taste of yourself on his lips. His hand moving to grab the condom on the bed, you only feel him part from you again for a moment so he can open it and roll it down his length before he is back between your legs.

“You’re perfect, did you know that?” His words cause you to look away, turning your face even as you feel his hand move between your legs, the head of his cock lining up with you. Jeonghan’s free hand moves to your chin turning your face back towards him, a groan on his breath when he pushes into you, “Look at me, please, baby? I wanna see those pretty eyes while I fuck you.”

The words didn’t cause your skin to burn any less, you wanted to look away but found it impossible when you met his eyes, your lips parting in a silent moan to the feeling of his cock stretching you as he thrusts in fully. “Oh my god…” Jeonghan moves his hand to run his thumb along your bottom lip, his hips getting into a rhythm when you wrap your leg around his hip allowing him to go deeper and harder.

“Feel so good, God…I’ve wanted this for so long. Such a fucking idiot for waiting this long.” The words are spoken on a groan, Jeonghan’s forehead resting against yours. His breath becomes shallow with each thrust and how your body pulls him back into you. “Fuck, Y/N…I love you. I should have told you that before this too.” You close your eyes, feeling tears gathering on the rim of your eyes, you weren’t sure what he wanted you to say. Especially right now, in this situation, he was just lost in the moment.

Lifting your hand you push it against his cheek, lifting your head to meet his lips in an attempt to make him stop talking, which seems to work. Jeonghan groans into your mouth, feeling you tightening around him, your walls quivering as you get close to another orgasm just as quickly as he was approaching his own. He wanted to keep telling you how he felt because it felt like the right time but your kiss was just too sweet, the way your bodies were fitting together was too perfect.

You whine on his lips falling back over that edge, your nails raking across his back causing him to hiss into the kiss. Jeonghan buries his face in the crook of your neck, his thrusts becoming more erratic and shallow but with one last hard, deep thrust you feel the warmth of him spilling into the condom. His hot breath causes chill bumps to spread across your skin, your fingers running through his hair at the back of his neck while he comes down from his climax.

After a few moments, Jeonghan pulls from you and slides from the bed taking care of the condom heading into the bathroom where you hear the sound of running water. You run your hand over your face, contemplating how many mistakes you had just made. Tears finally slip from your eyes when his words echo through your head once again, “I love you. I should have told you that before.”

“It isn’t even real.” You mutter to yourself running your hand over your face pushing the tears away.

Jeonghan could tell you were putting on an act with him, more so than you had before. A frown on his face when you pulled away from a kiss to your cheek even in front of your family, Jeonghan sighed, reaching to take your hand. You let him slide his fingers along yours but you avoid his gaze until he says your name and he can see the sadness in your eyes.

“Baby, are you okay?” No one was close enough to hear the two of you speaking but it was still good out in the open to keep up the act you supposed. “Yeah, I’m fine. Why Jeonghan?” You watch him furrow his brows leaning back some to look at you a bit more. “You have been acting strange since this morning. Is this about last night? Do you regret it?”

When you look away, Jeonghan feels his heart sink slightly. You did regret it, you didn’t even have to say it. “Uh, well fuck. Okay…well I don’t. I meant everything I said.” You scoff barely meeting his eyes, how could he say that when you knew the type of person Jeonghan was. He and Joshua would go out every weekend, sometimes even more during the week to pick up girls to get laid so how was this not just another exploit for him or just the feelings of the week getting to his head.

“No you didn’t Jeonghan, and that’s okay. I don’t blame you for that. None of this is real…one more day of this and you will be free to get your head clear of me.” You lift your hand knowing people were starting to watch you, pushing your thumb along his cheek trying to hide his disappointment.

“It’s real, Y/N. Why do you get to say it isn’t?” Shaking your head, you knew this wasn’t the place for this conversation. You weren’t having this conversation when he was drunk on an idea. Standing you take your hand from him and put on a fake smile. “Because I’m a realist.”

Your mom followed you when you walked away from Jeonghan as if she could sense the tension. Jeonghan stayed where he was for a few moments longer, shaking his head before heading outside to clear his head. You were wrong, you were fighting against your own feelings for some reason that Jeonghan couldn’t understand.

He had never been this vulnerable with someone in his life. You literally had his heart in your hands and he wasn’t sure what you were going to do with it.

The next day the both of you had different motives. You were trying to act like you were the happy engaged woman you were supposed to be while Jeonghan had to act like he wasn’t trying to figure you out. In the bedroom you were even more distant. Barely willing to speak to him other than to discuss flight details, and how you were sorry for putting him through this.

Jeonghan wasn’t sure how many different ways he could explain to you that there was nowhere else he would want to be. He wanted to reach inside of your head and shake your brain to make you see things for how they were and not like you were seeing them. Instead he relied on being kind and gentle with you simply reminding you that this was real and how much he cared about you.

The day of your flight, Jeonghan watched you hug your mom and dad, his heart sad at having to leave knowing you were sad doing the same. There was so much love in the house when it was just your immediate family and he could understand why he had fallen in love with you so easily so long ago and how it had been so easy to admit it to you now.

Leaning down to hug your mom, Jeonghan laughs at her kind goodbye and requests for him to help you keep in better touch with your family. “I will do my best. She’s pretty stubborn when she wants to be.” Your mom laughs, her eyes full of love when she meets Jeonghan’s eyes reaching up to pat his cheek. “Yes she is, you will have your hands full, dear.” That much he knew, but it’s all he wanted, that opportunity to be the person who shared that with you now.

Getting into the car after helping you in, Jeonghan glances over to you frowning when you turn your head in order to avoid his gaze. “Y/N, can we please talk about this? We are going to be stuck on a plane for hours, you can’t just avoid talking and looking at me for 5 hours.” You could, you think to yourself but you knew you were being unfair to Jeonghan.

Your fingers play with the ring on your finger while the car heads down the highway towards the airport, your eyes finally looking up to meet Jeonghan’s. “I’m sorry, I know I’ve been awful the past couple of days. I did warn you that what happened might hurt our friendship. You are a wonderful man…I feel like I took advantage of you this entire time.”

Jeonghan shakes his head, starting to speak when you reach over to take his hands, placing something metal into his palm. He didn’t need to look down to know what you had put there, he felt his heart sink, tears threatening his eyes but he kept them at bay nodding. “I wanted you to keep it. You didn’t take advantage of anything and I don’t think anything hurt us. I’ve told you, this is real. It’s real for me.”

Shaking your head you glance back out of the window while Jeonghan looks down at the diamond ring in his hand. “You just feel that way right now. You are too close to me, once you get some time away from me…you will realize we both just got a little caught up in it all.”

He wanted to argue with you but the lump in his throat wouldn’t allow it. Instead Jeonghan remained silent, his fingers playing with the ring until the car pulled up outside of the airport. He put it into his pocket and helped the driver to take out the bags letting you take yours when you requested it. Jeonghan’s eyes fixed on yours the entire way through security and while you waited for your flight.

He hadn’t taken the ring back out until the plane was in the air. You had fallen asleep, your head unknown to you resting against his shoulder, Jeonghan let the light from the window catch the diamond to make patterns on the seat in front of him. He felt sick with all the things he wanted to change, all the things he wanted to say. How could he make you understand?

By the time the plane was landing, Jeonghan reached to run his hand over your cheek, waking you up gently with the ring tucked back in his pocket. You could tell something was different about him but you weren’t willing to ask, afraid you would break his resolve or your own. “Sorry…” You mutter realizing you had been leaning against Jeonghan who shrugs only offering you a smile.

“You didn’t bother me, I’m just glad you got some rest.” He was too kind, you could still sense the sarcastic man under the layers but there was this new wall built. Nodding, you clear your throat glancing away, your thumb subconsciously playing with your ring finger, missing the feeling and weight of the ring on your hand.

Jeonghan helped you with your bag and with making your way to the front of the airport where the two of you had agreed to part ways after the trip. Watching you closely, Jeonghan sighs when you start to speak but end up stopping yourself several times causing him to speak instead.

“Y/N, don’t say anything until I finish. Can you do that much for me?” You nod, tears already prickling your eyes. The urge to turn and run causes your feet to ache but you manage to stay still with your eyes on Jeonghan. “You say it isn’t real, that what happened wasn’t supposed to happen. I disagree, because to me this is, or was very real. I’ve been in love with you for years but I was too stupid and prideful to say anything. I guess that’s what got me in this mess right now. So I can’t really blame you for reacting like you are.”

Jeonghan feels his stomach turning when tears build in your eyes, he hadn’t meant to make you cry but he had to finish what he was saying. “But I can’t make you love me back, I told you’d I’d never hurt you and I’d never make you do something you didn’t want to do.” Standing your ground, even as Jeonghan moves forward you let out a small whimper when he takes your hand and you feel the cold metal in your palm.

“I bought it for you for a reason.” Your eyes close when Jeonghan leans in to press a kiss to your forehead, you feel a slight wet feeling to his cheek when he turns to walk away. Your eyes open when the panic starts to set in, your gaze dropping to the ring in your hand feeling like it weighed a hundred pounds.

“Wait….” Your voice is so quiet you barely hear it yourself but when you say it again and yell his name dropping your bag, Jeonghan turns around surprised to find you running towards him. His own bag hitting the ground he is ready to catch you, his arms wrapping around you, his lips meeting yours.

Jeonghan lifts his hands running his thumbs along your cheeks between kisses trying to push away your tears whispering, “Shh, it’s okay baby…I know.” You shake your head reaching up to grab his wrists pulling his hands down, he can feel the ring back on your finger when he meets your eyes again hearing what his heart had been longing for for years.

“It’s real for me too. I love you too. I’m sorry. It’s real…”

Jeonghan smiles, nodding his forehead resting against yours while he tries to calm you down, his mutters echoing your own. Joshua watches from his car, leaning against the driver’s side with a sigh at the sight muttering to himself, “Bout damn time…glad I cleaned out my backseat. Told him I’d be taking them both home.”

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