#would anyone want to read a review on that?
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1425fivefive · 2 days ago
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if you’re still doing kink prompt asks, can you do piercings/tattoos with Carlos Sainz and Oscar Piastri?
yes!! carlos is a piercer in this and oscar has a pussy for unexplained reasons. there is an actual genital piercing in this, so don't read if you're squeamish about that 💕 (for the kink prompt asks)
Carlos sucks Oscar’s clit into his mouth, moaning when Oscar lets out a desperate whimper of Carlos’s name, thighs trembling.
Oscar’s always been sensitive, always liked having his clit sucked and played with. Most of the time, Carlos feels like he barely has to do anything to have Oscar coming, shaking and whining, falling apart on Carlos’s fingers or face or cock. Carlos knows he’s good with his hands, has to be because of his work, but he’s not delusional enough to think he’s some sort of sex god. He knows Oscar is just like that. Too sensitive for his own good.
Carlos had brought up the piercing sort of as a joke. Pinched Oscar’s clit between his fingers and said, “Imagine how sensitive you would be with something sparkly here. You would never stop coming, I think.” Oscar’s mouth had dropped open, blinking up at Carlos with a shocked expression, and he came with a shuddering moan, clit twitching between Carlos’s fingers. Oscar hadn’t wanted to talk about it after, had just shoved his face against Carlos’s neck, thick thigh slung over Carlos’s waist.
Oscar hadn’t brought it up again for ages and Carlos figured he’d forgotten about it. Mindless dirty talk, in one ear and out the other.
But Oscar had turned up at the shop one day, hoodie pulled over his head like he was trying to avoid being spotted, like anyone would care about a random engineering student walking into a piercing studio. He’d barely been able to get the words out but he’d asked Carlos to show him pictures of clitoral piercings.
Carlos had pulled out a binder and they’d flipped through it together, Carlos resting a soft palm on Oscar’s lower back, pointing out which ones would increase sensitivity, which ones were easiest to heal.
Oscar lingered on one picture. “What’s this one called?” Oscar asked, voice so soft Carlos almost couldn’t hear him.
“Ah, that one is a vertical clitoral hood piercing,” Carlos said. “VCH for short.”
Oscar hummed, a pink flush rising in his cheeks.
“It is pretty, no?” Carlos asked, watching Oscar closely.
“Yeah, uh, really pretty,” Oscar said, still barely audible. “And does it—feel good?”
Carlos laughed softly, leaning in to press a kiss to Oscar’s neck. “Very good, cariño. The people I have given it to are always leaving me very nice reviews.”
Oscar let out a little squeak, a shiver running through him.
“If you want,” Carlos murmured, tugging Oscar closer to him, sliding his hand down to cup Oscar’s arse. “I could do it for you.”
Oscar moaned, shuddering against Carlos. “I have to—I need to—” He trailed off, letting out another little moan. “Let me think about it, maybe?”
“Of course,” Carlos said. “Take as long as you need.”
He’d eaten Oscar out on one of the display counters, after, made Oscar come three times on his tongue, imagining the taste of metal in his mouth, how easy it’d be to make Oscar come.
In the end, Oscar had only taken a week to think about it.
They’d been in Carlos’s flat, Oscar in Carlos’s lap, Carlos helping Oscar bounce on his cock, when Oscar had panted, “I want it. Please, Carlos. Want you to.”
Carlos had come on the spot.
And now he has Oscar in his bed, naked and flushed, thick thighs splayed apart, pussy dripping onto Carlos’s sheets. Carlos’s piercing tools are next to them on a tray, along with the little bar Carlos picked out for him with two white jewels on either end. The little bar that’s going to be pressed up right against Oscar’s clit, keeping him sensitive and wet and needy, desperate for Carlos.
Carlos moans against Oscar’s cunt, sucking hard on his clit. It’ll be easier if Oscar’s turned on, his clit swollen and easy to pierce. And it’ll be less painful if he’s just come. If he’s still riding the endorphins of his orgasm. Oscar also won’t be able to play with his clit for a few weeks, has to leave it alone to heal. Carlos can’t even imagine how desperate Oscar will be at the end of it, how good that first orgasm with the piercing in will feel. Carlos sort of wants to see if he’ll finally be able to get Oscar to squirt.
“Carlos,” Oscar gasps, back arching off the bed and thighs spreading wide in the way they always do right when he’s about to come. “Carlos, fuck, oh, please, Carlos.”
Carlos whines and drags a flat tongue over Oscar’s clit, keeping the pressure steady and even, making sure his tongue’s covering Oscar’s entire clit, that Oscar can feel him everywhere.
Oscar’s thighs are shaking and he’s gone almost silent, nothing except little gasping breaths, tiny hitched whimpers. It only takes one more drag of Carlos’s tongue for Oscar to come with a hoarse scream, cunt twitching rapidly under Carlos’s mouth, wetness flooding onto Carlos’s chin, Carlos’s sheets. Carlos groans, licking Oscar through it, hoping his sheets will smell like Oscar for days, a reminder of the pleasure Carlos brought him.
Oscar hasn’t even finished coming when he gasps, “Do it.”
Carlos moans, giving Oscar’s clit one last suck, but he sits up, grabbing for the needle.
Oscar’s still shaking a bit, still trembling, but he goes still when Carlos pinches Oscar’s swollen clit between his fingers, letting out a whimper that sounds aroused and frightened all at once.
“Deep breath, cariño,” Carlos murmurs, positioning the needle. He feels focused, in control. He’s done thousands of piercings, he knows he’s good at this, knows he won’t hurt Oscar. “Deep breath.”
Oscar whimpers again but he takes a shaky breath in, looking up at Carlos with desperate eyes.
“Good,” Carlos soothes. “Now let it out.”
Oscar starts to exhale and Carlos pushes the needle through, quick and efficient, one smooth movement.
Oscar lets out an anguished scream but it turns into something else halfway through, a cry of pleasure, and then Oscar’s shaking, toes curling, hands twitching, letting out little gasps of, “Oh, oh, oh.”
“Oh my god,” Carlos moans, watching Oscar come just from the feeling of being pierced, just from the brush of metal against his clit. “Oh my god, Oscar, oh my god.”
Oscar’s still coming, cunt gushing onto the bed, trembling and crying out, desperate chants of Carlos’s name.
“I’m here,” Carlos breathes, pressing a kiss to Oscar’s knee, keeping the needle steady, keeping Oscar’s throbbing clit between his fingers. “I’m here, baby, you’re okay.”
“Carlos,” Oscar sobs, one last shiver before finally going lax against the bed.
Carlos takes a shaky breath before reaching for the jewelry, slipping it through and screwing the gems on either end. Carlos can’t hold back a moan at the sight of Oscar’s puffy cunt, his swollen clit decorated with little jewels. Carlos had thought Oscar’s cunt was pretty before, but now—
“Beautiful,” Carlos murmurs, staring at Oscar’s pussy. “So pretty.”
Oscar whines, thighs splaying open, even as he whispers, “Hurts.”
“I know,” Carlos soothes, running a palm over Oscar’s thigh. “But I think you like that, no?”
Oscar lets out a tiny, anguished sob, but he nods, once.
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downtowncannibal · 4 months ago
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theres a black Christmas board game Kickstarter going around. Dunno how legit. Wonder if it'll get traction since it's the big five o anniversary. What do you think what can black Christmas fans look forward to in terms of official merch in the future, if anything?
Yes ! It is legit, as I've seen some advertising for it + product videos (and it's also being sold by a reputable company, Stop The Killer!). Although I haven't seen any listings for the actual board game, there is one thing up for preorders right now, and is to released in December!
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Along with this, there's also a 6' Unicorn replica listed, which is supposed to come with the board game.
Although there hasn't been much promo for it, you're absolutely right about the big 50 coming up. I think that'll definitely cause a push in Black Christmas references in the mainstream horror fandom, however, I believe that if there is going to be a real, big, horrifically marketable push for the Black Christmas Board Game/book, it lies in the Terrifier 3 release. That is going to push Black Christmas wayyyy into the public eye for a bit.
Black Christmas isn't obscure by any means, but there's just not much fandom around it. However, it is one of the original christmas horror movies, and Terrifier 3 is said to have references to it. I think inevitably Black Christmas will have to be brought up.
And in that regard to the fact Black Christmas just doesn't have that demand for product, I also don't think fans can be expecting anything big anytime soon, it's just not profitable, even with the Terrifier release. We've had special movie releases in the last couple years (The 4k addition, The Bob Clark collection) but, something huge and beyond a new Gutter Garbs shirt? Nah.
Regardless, im still hoping for some new commentaries with the living cast.
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jawz · 3 months ago
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i saw the tv glow is legitimately one of the stupidest, most tryhard movies i've ever seen in my entire life. absolute dogshit. and everyone is pretending it's the most lifechanging thing they've ever seen LOL give me a break! the gall to claim this is inspired by fucking DAVID LYNCH??? i can't
#fake 'deep' shit for ppl who watch steven universe every day#i truly didnt relate to anything onscreen despite it being sooo aimed at me in so many ways.#i'm also convinced the director is racist and ofc after reading hundreds of reviews. Not One mentions#the main character's race or the alienation of being mixed......... um.#i think people are getting Very Very Dumb overall.#and it;s no coincidence that prior to being embraced by actual trans ppl all i saw was a million NON TRANS ppl falling all over themselves#to be like OOOOOMGGGGG THIS IS THEEEEEEEE TRANS EXPERIENCE COMMITTED TO FILM!!!!1!!!#like god thank you so much for speaking on something you know nothing about !!!! <3#anyway the movie glorifies suicide more than pretty much anything ive ever heard of (including 13 reasons why)#and paints transness as Killing the Old Self. what a bleak and brutal thing to put onscreen and then CLAIM IS POSITIVE????#if this is aimed at kids (not sure if it rly is but it certainly would appeal to them and has the emotional maturity of a 14 yr old) then#its 100% going to inspire suicidal or self-injurious behavior. and it's insane and reckless as a filmmaker to craft this supposedly hauntin#and supposedly beautiful narrative where THE most important step is FUCKING KILLING YOURSELF. it's self hatred at the deepest level.#if anyone wants to shit talk this director with me lmk because that Worlds Fair movie is also some of the worst TRASH ive ever watched!!!#Amy Nicholson was spot-on abt it as always tho so i was vindicated by that
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kyouka-supremacy · 10 days ago
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(╥﹏╥)
#We've had our yearly secret santa gifts exchange at my dorm and I've been gifted the first volume of Beast 😭😭😭😭😭#I'm crying forever. This december marks three years since I've watched the first b/sd episode#and yet this is the first time I actually own a b/sd manga volume. Like I own it and I can read it whenever I want!!! How cool is that!!!!!#Like there's so many Akutagawa images in it!!!! It's insane!!!!!!!! AND IT'S BEAST AT THAT#I'm deeply moved because I never spoke about it to virtually anyone here (at my dorm)?#Like I suppose a bunch of people vaguely know I like anime but only a couple of close friends know I like. Like-like reading manga lol.#And the person who gifted it DEFINITELY didn't know I like anime in general much less b/sd specifically much less Beast in particular!!!!!#I'm 100% sure (they just arrived this year and we hadn't even had that much occasions to talk to each other).#Which means they went through the trouble of gathering intel from my close friends about what I like and actually follow through‚#seek for the specific manga in a comic store etc... It's such a nice gesture I'm so heartwarmed.#And of course I'm glad for every gift I've received in the last years (genuinely)‚ but the fact that this was the most *specific* to what–#I like. It makes it so special! They were so kind.#There must be one (1) person in this whole 60 people dorm who knows I like Beast–#(that would be the girl who introduced b/sd to me in the first place) and the fact that they asked them for it...#I feel both very grateful and lucky lol#When I unwrapped it!!! Like I thought it was just a random book which would have been nice but like!!!!!#When I actually saw through the thin paper the cover!!!! The scream I screamed in my head#Anyways!!!! I own a b/sd manga now!!!!! I've only got time to go through the first chapter so far but it's suchhhh an experience.#It's like reading it for the first time again 😭😭😭 Half because the translation is so much different than the English one lol.#And I basically know the English version by heart. Half because I never saw this kind of high quality!!!!! It's!!!!! Insane!!!!! Like!!!!!!#I'm crying ����😭😭 The drawings are so sharp and crisp (in the good way). The lines are so clean there's no disturbance at all#I literally never saw anything so good in my life I'm crying a little. I'm so so glad they blessed me with Beast specifically#The takebon edition is pretty cheap (it's just planet manga so there's no color illustrations or dust cover or anything unfortunatelly.#But to make up for it the volumes are significantly cheaper then let's say J-Pop)#There's also some unique typesetting choices? The text from the book-like boxes is in lowercase which is interesting!#Initially I thought I wouldn't have liked the translation (opening it randomly there was Akutagawa saying “crepa!” (“die!”) to Dazai in ch1#Which was kinda jarring since it's very low register and everyone knows Akutagawa has very complex speech patterns.)#But actually reading it I'm really enjoying the translation so far!!!!#There's so many choices that made me grasp details I actually missed all the times I've read the English translation.#That is to say! Very excited to read it!!!! Will probably make a review / translation commentary if I can find the time!!!!!
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yoldels · 7 days ago
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Finished the Sdr 2 playthrough a few days ago, btw
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artigas · 11 months ago
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The Spring semester has officially started, which means I am now fully preparing for my comps, a two-hour oral exam that I have to take in order to officially become a PhD candidate. I have to read ninety books by May, latest August : )
I’ve gotten started with the most exciting of my three reading lists: the Gothic!! Basically, my reading is going to be a journey of getting a comprehensive overview of all things 19th-century British/Victorian literature, 19th-century Latin American literature, and the Gothic. I’ve already gotten started with my first five books, but I thought the other day: I feel like video reviews of each book would be a fantastic way to remember the important information about each of the readings. Nothing crazy or long, just a 2-5 minute review of the book and why it’s important if you want to become a student of the literature.
Anyways, I like this idea a lot and I feel like sharing it on my old bookstagram or on TikTok would be a nice way to get a dopamine hit for the reviews — if anyone were to watch or react to my reviews, I know it would make reviewing the books all the more fun!
But . . . And this is a big but . . . Then that would mean that I’d be opening myself to being perceived. And that’s really embarrassing to me. Like, what if I make a video and nobody gives a fuck? That’s so embarrassing. What if I make a video and a student or someone in my program sees it? Mortifying. It really does seem fun and a small part of me really want to do it but man, oh man, would I be scared!!
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llitchilitchi · 9 months ago
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people always complain about a story not making sense because they refuse to read the notes and stuff found around in the world and call it bad game design, but when a story has a lot of exposition in dialogue its bad writing because its exposition dump, and when the notes and dialogue are made to be minimal so people can only learn the lore they feel like learning the story is "badly delivered" because it was not spoon-fed to us? just say you hate spending time learning the lore and go
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sirellas · 1 year ago
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Left Hand of Destiny (1&2) stream of consciousness review
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Overall thoughts: I really liked this book! Or technically 2 books but the second is just the continuation of the first so in my head it was just one long book (~500 pages all in all). This is only the second trek book I've read and also the second written by the actor who played the character in ds9 (shoutout to ASIT, though this one has a non-actor co-writer as well), but even beyond the star trekking of TLHOD, this was a really good read in terms of writing style, pace, emotion. It was very action and character focused which I enjoyed, and especially the characterization of Martok was so great and obviously JG Hertzler had a lot of thoughts about the character he played that translated really well on page.
The memory alpha article on TLHOD says this but I didn't really start to see it until the last half of book 2, but this is very much a King Arthur story (btw don't look at that memory alpha page unless you don't care about major spoilers lol). Down to a lady in the lake handing out mythical swords. That instance was a little heavy handed in my opinion, but I did like all of the prophetic dreams and talk of glorious purpose.
That's something to note though: if you don't like dream sequences, this is not the book for you. There are A LOT of dreams. In fact the opening scene is a dream, but it's now my new favorite opening line in a book because it jumps right in by telling you who this guy is and what his deal is:
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I personally am a big fan of overt symbolism like this (even a well done cliché or two), myths and repeating cycles of heroism etc etc. And I think this book melded Arthurian drama with Klingon drama well. The Klingon-ness of this book was great. What better way to get to the heart of Klingon culture in a story but by focusing on the guy chosen to lead his people and getting it ripped out from beneath his feet and having to decide that he actually wants to be chancellor. In a lot of ways this is a story of outcasts finding their way back to where they belong, which isn't always what they expect or want in the beginning. Which leads me to...
The supporting characters really made this book. Without Pharh the Ferengi who got bullied for being as ugly as a Klingon as a child and now runs a landfill on Qo'noS, there would be no book. He's my favorite (little buddy coded to the extreme) but most of the major side characters are really well explored in terms of motivation and actions. Worf, Sirella, Ezri, Darok, Kahless, Alexander, to name a few. Alexander and Kahless were two of my other surprise standouts. And because no one who hasn't read this book knows about my new favorite guy Pharh, I will now include a couple passages I highlighted to spread the word about how great he is:
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Wide array of well developed side characters aside, this book is awful for women. Yes the main antagonist is Martok's insane ex, but her character is kind of too outlandish to really have much depth. Ezri shows up at the end of book 1 and plays a big part in book 2 but honestly I'm not sure why she was even there (apart from loyalty etc, but I mean story-wise she didn't add all that much to keep the action moving ((anyone else could have been subbed in for her 9 out of 10 times and it would've made more sense tbh)) except to be another explainer of Klingon things to the reader). Sirella has a few great scenes, but not nearly enough and she wasn't allowed to do much either in terms of agency and impact on plot. Martok's two daughters are barely afterthoughts.
The main plot is that a usurper attacks Qo'noS (and specifically goes after Martok), swaying the Klingon people to their side through a combo of bioengineered charisma and the people's growing resentment toward progressive ideas that Martok (and Worf) represents. That's really only the problem in book 1, while book 2 deals more with Martok accepting the hand fate has dealt and deciding to win so they can save the decaying Klingon heart and so on. But even with the kind of cheesy setup, it rarely felt overwrought or unearned with the emotional beats. The antagonist lady is, yeah, she's a bit over the top. And before 2016 I would've said the quick flip to xenophobia and Make Klingons Great Again (I'm pretty sure they use that phrase almost exactly) in the general public was unrealistic but hey, cycles of destiny and evil constantly shifting and repeating, am I right??
There were... quite a few deaths. I guess I should've expected that, being a Klingon setting and all, but some of them hit me hard. And a few I don't think really needed to happen and kind of weakened the narrative.... maybe I'll put a spoiler section below a cut at the bottom of this to discuss those 🤪
This paragraph will haunt me for a while I think... 😀 sorry for inflicting it on others now but hey that's show business
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Even with some hiccups (see spoiler section below), I loved the book pretty much. Shocker: tumblr user girlmartok loves the Martok book, but it was better than I had hoped even. The Martok focus was so good and the side characters just made it even better. Much more of a heroic fantasy than most star trek settings, which fit really well and also was refreshing. It's long! But I would recommend it if you have any interest in Klingons and/or fun little guys who go on adventures and think a lot about death.
SPOILERS ⬇️
Okay ripping the bandaid off. The way Sirella died was not chill. I mean even having her die was not something I would have included, because the story really didn't dive all that deep into her and Martok's relationship. But ramming an enemy ship so Martok could flee near the beginning of book 2... and she doesn't even kill any major bad guys doing it?? It just served no point narratively (the bad guys still outnumbered them, still caught up to them not long after) and it didn't even really affect Martok all that much beyond like one paragraph where he wants to turn around and go on a murder spree in her name... He doesn't even get to go on a murder spree in her name!!!
Bandaid rip #2: PHARH MY LITTLE BABY BOY DIES???? I was glad I had forewarning about this one because I would've been mad otherwise. I am not exaggerating saying he was my second favorite character in this book after Martok. The humor he added, yes, but also just his role as an outsider who's seen as weak by both Ferengi and Klingon, and he befriends the chancellor of the Klingon Empire, HOLDS ONTO THE CHANCELLOR'S RING FOR MOST OF THE BOOK AND BECOMES HIS SQUIRE BASICALLY 🫠💔 I don't know how anyone wouldn't fall in love with him. At least his death was done well, even though I don't think it should have happened. He at least got a murderous rampage in his name 😤 and Martok basically adopted him so he could get into Sto'vo'kor 🥺
Those were my main two criticisms of the book, and really ties into why this wasn't as great a story as ASIT, for example. A lot of things happen to Martok, but some things don't get the resolution they would need to influence him on this character journey he's going on. One of Martok's defining characteristics in ds9 is that he's a wife guy and his wife doesn't take bullshit. But then his wife dies suddenly and he's upset but he's not Upset upset, if you know what I mean. It didn't feel earned and it didn't feel necessary. Literally the first and only time it did feel like a reasonable plot device was at the very end when Worf tells him that people love a tragic victor even more than a victory. The problem is just that Martok doesn't ever explore what that tragedy really means to him.
Justice for Shen and Lazhna, Martok's daughters, who in addition to dying off screen are only brought up to highlight how shitty of a dad Martok has been. He just thinks of them (and his son Drex too but he gets more characterization solely by virtue of appearing in the narrative) in terms of himself and his love for them is more on the side of pity rather than real emotional attachment. Sirella should've been way meaner to him about that tbh.
Non character death related but a big focus of the first book was Martok losing public opinion pretty much immediately. Old friends turn against him and that really shakes him. But then in the second book... that's not really brought up again? The whole second book takes place away from Qo'noS, and yeah they mention that people will probably become less affected by the dumb bioengineered charisma after time, but I cannot stress enough how much the entire planet hated him. So he won the big battle against his foes etc etc, came back to Qo'noS and... just told everyone all that?? That goes along with the lack of fully exploring the consequences of some of these bad things that happen to Martok. It felt like a little too much piled on him and not enough resolution.
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jvzebel-x · 10 months ago
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desperate times call for desperate measures.
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airandangels · 2 years ago
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volfoss · 8 months ago
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Been working on it all day but... Finally conquered the scary spreadsheet
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blamemma · 2 years ago
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in case anyone is interested i read 30 books this year (a low-ish number for me but i wrote my thesis this year and had approximately 7 big mental breakdowns so a good number) 9 of those being non-fiction and the rest fiction/poetry :) these were the 5 books i gave 5 stars (again, a kind of low number but i think i spent a lot of this year reading books that could have been 5 stars at the wrong time of the year so they kinda lost out sorry to them x :/ )
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thatgirlonstage · 11 months ago
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I’ve got a whole tag essay down there already but I need to put this in a comment section, I just need everyone to understand that it’s fine if you only enjoy stuff with likable characters, just please god own it as a PREFERENCE and don’t try to put it forward as an objective judgment on whether a story is good or not
I'm curious given how often I see "none of the characters were good/likeable/lovable" as a criticism or reason not to recommend a book
*by this, I mean likeable to you. (meaning you like them/feel fondly towards them etc). of course it's not an objective measure, but I'm asking whether you personally liking or disliking the characters has an impact on your enjoyment of the story. doesn't matter whether they're also complex/well written/interesting/compelling etc*
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angeygirl · 6 days ago
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I know I said I was going to write about Purple Guy trying to fight Santa Claus to the death but I ended up writing about 8y/o Michael Afton trying to have a good Christmas while his dad is depressed and I'm way more invested in that now tbh
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why-animals-do-the-thing · 5 months ago
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average United States contains 1000s of pet tigers in backyards" factoid actualy [sic] just statistical error. average person has 0 tigers on property. Activist Georg, who lives the U.S. Capitol & makes up over 10,000 each day, has purposefully been spreading disinformation adn [sic] should not have been counted
I have a big mad today, folks. It's a really frustrating one, because years worth of work has been validated... but the reason for that fucking sucks.
For almost a decade, I've been trying to fact-check the claim that there "are 10,000 to 20,000 pet tigers/big cats in backyards in the United States." I talked to zoo, sanctuary, and private cat people; I looked at legislation, regulation, attack/death/escape incident rates; I read everything I could get my hands on. None of it made sense. None of it lined up. I couldn't find data supporting anything like the population of pet cats being alleged to exist. Some of you might remember the series I published on those findings from 2018 or so under the hashtag #CrouchingTigerHiddenData. I've continued to work on it in the six years since, including publishing a peer reviewed study that counted all the non-pet big cats in the US (because even though they're regulated, apparently nobody bothered to keep track of those either).
I spent years of my life obsessing over that statistic because it was being used to push for new federal legislation that, while well intentioned, contained language that would, and has, created real problems for ethical facilities that have big cats. I wrote a comprehensive - 35 page! - analysis of the issues with the then-current version of the Big Cat Public Safety Act in 2020. When the bill was first introduced to Congress in 2013, a lot of groups promoted it by fear mongering: there's so many pet tigers! they could be hidden around every corner! they could escape and attack you! they could come out of nowhere and eat your children!! Tiger King exposed the masses to the idea of "thousands of abused backyard big cats": as a result the messaging around the bill shifted to being welfare-focused, and the law passed in 2022.
The Big Cat Public Safety Act created a registry, and anyone who owned a private cat and wanted to keep it had to join. If they did, they could keep the animal until it passed, as long as they followed certain strictures (no getting more, no public contact, etc). Don’t register and get caught? Cat is seized and major punishment for you. Registering is therefore highly incentivized. That registry closed in June of 2023, and you can now get that registration data via a Freedom of Information Act request.
Guess how many pet big cats were registered in the whole country?
97.
Not tens of thousands. Not thousands. Not even triple digits. 97.
And that isn't even the right number! Ten USDA licensed facilities registered erroneously. That accounts for 55 of 97 animals. Which leaves us with 42 pet big cats, of all species, in the entire country.
Now, I know that not everyone may have registered. There's probably someone living deep in the woods somewhere with their illegal pet cougar, and there's been at least one random person in Texas arrested for trying to sell a cub since the law passed. But - and here's the big thing - even if there are ten times as many hidden cats than people who registered them - that's nowhere near ten thousand animals. Obviously, I had some questions.
Guess what? Turns out, this is because it was never real. That huge number never had data behind it, wasn't likely to be accurate, and the advocacy groups using that statistic to fearmonger and drive their agenda knew it... and didn't see a problem with that.
Allow me to introduce you to an article published last week.
This article is good. (Full disclose, I'm quoted in it). It's comprehensive and fairly written, and they did their due diligence reporting and fact-checking the piece. They talked to a lot of people on all sides of the story.
But thing that really gets me?
Multiple representatives from major advocacy organizations who worked on the Big Cat Publix Safety Act told the reporter that they knew the statistics they were quoting weren't real. And that they don't care. The end justifies the means, the good guys won over the bad guys, that's just how lobbying works after all. They're so blase about it, it makes my stomach hurt. Let me pull some excerpts from the quotes.
"Whatever the true number, nearly everyone in the debate acknowledges a disparity between the actual census and the figures cited by lawmakers. “The 20,000 number is not real,” said Bill Nimmo, founder of Tigers in America. (...) For his part, Nimmo at Tigers in America sees the exaggerated figure as part of the political process. Prior to the passage of the bill, he said, businesses that exhibited and bred big cats juiced the numbers, too. (...) “I’m not justifying the hyperbolic 20,000,” Nimmo said. “In the world of comparing hyperbole, the good guys won this one.”
"Michelle Sinnott, director and counsel for captive animal law enforcement at the PETA Foundation, emphasized that the law accomplished what it was set out to do. (...) Specific numbers are not what really matter, she said: “Whether there’s one big cat in a private home or whether there’s 10,000 big cats in a private home, the underlying problem of industry is still there.”"
I have no problem with a law ending the private ownership of big cats, and with ending cub petting practices. What I do have a problem with is that these organizations purposefully spread disinformation for years in order to push for it. By their own admission, they repeatedly and intentionally promoted false statistics within Congress. For a decade.
No wonder it never made sense. No wonder no matter where I looked, I couldn't figure out how any of these groups got those numbers, why there was never any data to back any of the claims up, why everything I learned seemed to actively contradict it. It was never real. These people decided the truth didn't matter. They knew they had no proof, couldn't verify their shocking numbers... and they decided that was fine, if it achieved the end they wanted.
So members of the public - probably like you, reading this - and legislators who care about big cats and want to see legislation exist to protect them? They got played, got fed false information through a TV show designed to tug at heartstrings, and it got a law through Congress that's causing real problems for ethical captive big cat management. The 20,000 pet cat number was too sexy - too much of a crisis - for anyone to want to look past it and check that the language of the law wouldn't mess things up up for good zoos and sanctuaries. Whoops! At least the "bad guys" lost, right? (The problems are covered somewhat in the article linked, and I'll go into more details in a future post. You can also read my analysis from 2020, linked up top.)
Now, I know. Something something something facts don't matter this much in our post-truth era, stop caring so much, that's just how politics work, etc. I’m sorry, but no. Absolutely not.
Laws that will impact the welfare of living animals must be crafted carefully, thoughtfully, and precisely in order to ensure they achieve their goals without accidental negative impacts. We have a duty of care to ensure that. And in this case, the law also impacts reservoir populations for critically endangered species! We can't get those back if we mess them up. So maybe, just maybe, if legislators hadn't been so focused on all those alleged pet cats, the bill could have been written narrowly and precisely.
But the minutiae of regulatory impacts aren't sexy, and tiger abuse and TV shows about terrible people are. We all got misled, and now we're here, and the animals in good facilities are already paying for it.
I don't have a conclusion. I'm just mad. The public deserves to know the truth about animal legislation they're voting for, and I hope we all call on our legislators in the future to be far more critical of the data they get fed.
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capricornlevi · 2 months ago
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nanami x reader - w.c 3k, marraige of convenience, mentions of societal pressure but everything is consensual!, nsfw, mdni!
without even meeting him, you agreed to marry nanami kento without any expectations of future love, romantic or otherwise.
the pairing is advantageous for the both of you; you get access to the impressive nanami family fortune that has grown substantially now that kento is managing it, while he gets to enjoy a close association with your prestigious family and the subsequent educational opportunities that your children will benefit from. it's sensible and by far the best option you'd been presented with.
you've exchanged letters with him, polite and concise. you can read between the lines and see that he shares a disillusioned view of jujutsu society, but is more than willing to step up for the good of his family.
you weren't coerced by anyone. far from it -- your mother and father had sat you down and asked if you were sure, that they would understand if you wanted to take more time or to choose a different path for yourself altogether.
but you know the rest of society would not be so kind or understanding. marriage between two sorcerers, as antiquated as it seems, is how you survive amongst all of these competitive, power-hungry families.
from what you've read and heard about him, nanami will provide stability. he's progressive in his thinking, and so wont expect anything from you that he wouldn't be willing to do as well. you've learned that he's a teacher at tokyo tech, and has received glowing reviews; he'll be a good father.
and so on this misty thursday morning, you lay eyes on your fiancé for the first time as he slips a ring on your finger and promises to stay by your side forever.
the ceremony is as bare-bones as your reputation will allow. the guest list doesn't hit the triple digits, a huge departure from society norms, but representatives from the major houses sit in floral-clad wooden chairs to watch you repeat the words that the officiant speaks in your direction.
nanami takes your hands in his. they're warm, which is nice. this dress isn't designed for November weather, but it's an heirloom -- and truthfully, you're glad to be wearing it. you'd never given much thought to a wedding, but it makes your mother and grandmother very happy.
you'd be lying if you said you weren't relieved to discover how handsome nanami is. you were previously shown a few polaroids of him -- staff pictures, mostly, but some with the rest of his family -- and had known he wasn't bad-looking, but the pictures weren't clear enough to give you a proper understanding of his looks.
his blond hair is styled neatly, not a hair out of place. he has nice features, strong jawline and cheekbones, and soft eyes, a good combination. you know his gaze can be piercing when he wants it to be, but now, he looks at you gently.
you know you made the right decision.
more vows, a kiss, and you're married.
___
the reception goes mercifully smoothly. the mix of guests -- powerful sorcerer family heads, rich businesspeople, and just a few of your personal friends -- didn't appear to gel too well on paper, but they mostly stick to their own factions. you greet them all until your vocal cords grow tired.
a meal is served on plates so ornate it makes you feel awkward eating off them. you nurse a glass of wine for most of the evening and nanami does the same, politely waving off the servers who approach to refill his glass.
a promising sign that he doesn't feel the need to drown his sorrows. this is a marriage of convenience, yes, but you'd like to be able to get along reasonably well with your spouse.
and, to his credit, he's been making light conversation with you all evening. he doesn't dip into deep or uncomfortable topics like your marriage or future plans, figuring that's best saved for later, but he asks you questions about yourself. by the end of the evening, you feel safe enough to allude to your desire for a future somewhat outside society's norms -- "I've always wanted to travel, honestly. maybe ... spend a few years abroad" -- and, to your pleasant surprise, he doesn't rebuff them. if anything, he seems somewhat pleased.
you have another glass of wine and before you know it, it's the early hours of the morning. you're nowhere near tipsy but feel ready for bed, ready to wipe off this makeup and slip into something more comfortable; thankfully, guests have started to slip out one by one, with only immediate family remaining.
your unpleasant and friendless older cousin makes a joke about you needing to say your goodbyes to 'go please your husband', and nanami's face sours for the first time all evening. your cousin notices and sheepishly takes a drink, mumbling something about it being his time to leave too.
with some final hugs to your respective families, it's time to leave with ...
... with your husband.
in his last letter before the wedding, nanami agreed that your city-centre apartment would be the best place to live in the first few weeks of your marriage, until you find somewhere more permanent that suits you both, and so that's where you go.
you show him around each room, including some storage space where his luggage had been delivered this morning. interspersed with some more small talk, you explain that although it's small, it's well placed for both of you to get to work. he smiles and nods, thanking you with a warmth that doesn't feel forced.
you offer him some tea or whiskey; he says he's fine.
you yawn. he loosens his tie, clearly exhausted himself.
the last room you show him is your bedroom, and it becomes harder and harder not to address the elephant in the room. there's very clearly no second bed, no room for him to stay that wouldn't necessitate a lot of closeness between the two of you.
the silence hangs heavy and loaded, both of you waiting for the other to speak.
well. this is one issue you hadn't covered before the ceremony.
you have no issue with a sexual relationship -- in fact, you're somewhat looking forward to it, having spent the evening admiring the way nanami's shirt hugs his strong arms and chest. but you're not sure if tonight, the first night you've ever met, is the best night to start.
sure, the concept of the wedding night speaks for itself, but it's not as black-and-white in your situation. he might want to spend some time settling in, first. he might not even be that interested in you.
"want me to take the couch?" he asks quietly, with no hint of resentment or offence in his voice. he makes the offer with a sincerity you haven't heard from a man in a long time.
you don't break your silence, but not because you're uncomfortable or anything of the sort -- you're just assessing your options.
"there's nothing i expect from you, just so you know," he continues, and you turn your head to face him, seeing his eyes scan your face for any sign of unease. "the last thing i want is for you to do ... this ... out of obligation or pressure. we have a lifetime to get to know each other, to reach that point -- i want you to be comfortable around me."
your upbringing has made you a sceptic, a pessimist at times, but for some reason, you believe him. maybe it's the look in his eyes, or the fact that he's taken your hand in his own, interlocking your fingers, but there's something about him that sets him aside from normal sorcerers.
he seems real. he seems as though, powers and fortunes and family names aside, he has some substance about him.
"do you want to?" you ask then, voice almost inaudible quiet from a day spent conversing with guests at your wedding.
he doesn't hear you, so he dips his head in your direction; you repeat yourself and wait, hoping you hadn't pressed the issue.
his composure doesn't crack, but something flashes in his eyes as he processes your question. he has such control over the movements of his features, over every expression in his body, except for his eyes, you think.
maybe you just happen to be good at reading him.
he mulls it over for a second, his grip on your hand never slacking.
"i want to," he finally admits. "i've wanted to for a while, truthfully. I've spent a lot of late nights picturing how it would feel to be inside you, to hear what my name sounds like when you say it. but i only want that if you want it too."
you smile without meaning to. "you imagined that from just reading a few letters?"
"yes, and it's a testament to my trust in my new wife that I'm telling you that," he replies, still polite but tinged with amusement.
it feels strange standing at your bedroom doorway, hand in hand with this almost-stranger, imagining what it would be like to indulge in these thoughts you've both been having, spending your first night together tangled up in the sheets and allowing some of the indulgence you've long denied yourself.
duty gets tiring. for a long time, you've been unsure what it feels like to genuinely want something.
now, you're pretty sure it feels something like this. it's organic and unforced, a natural desire that sends heat curling in the pit of your stomach.
wordlessly, you guide nanami into your room, closing the door behind you. there's a hint of a smile on his lips as you ask him for help to untie your wedding dress, the intricate pattern of buttons trailing up your spine proving too technical for your own hands. he's methodical in his work, careful to not damage the delicate clasps.
soon your dress is loose around your hips, your chest covered by the thin slip you wore underneath. you set the garment carefully aside before returning the favour and starting to undo nanami's shirt, avoiding eye contact as your hands expose more and more of his bare chest.
you want to do this, you know that for sure, but that doesn't mean you won't feel a bit of awkwardness at the start. you're not well practiced, having had too busy a life for romantic relationships until now. you hope that instinct will kick in sooner than later, but you've no doubt nanami will help you along the way.
when you finally build up the nerve to glance up at him as he shrugs off the shirt, he's looking at you as though you're the only person he ever wants touching him.
you hear the soft clink of metal and realise he's undoing his belt.
"are you sure?" he asks one more time.
that one question, and the earnestness with which he speaks, erases the last shred of doubt you had. you place your trust in him for the second time today.
you nod and reach across to his belt in the same breath, helping him pull it free from the loops to be tossed by the armchair near your desk.
you move as though controlled by something other than yourself, the decisions coming so naturally it feels as though you've been imagining it for weeks as well.
and maybe you have, you think to yourself, as you confidently guide him back slowly until he's sitting down on the plush armchair, his suit pants still on as you crawl onto his lap, pressing your chest against his. the thin fabric of your slip means you can feel the heat of his body against your skin, nipples hardening as they graze against his muscles.
you've just about balanced yourself, carefully perched on his lap when you feel his hand on the nape of your neck, pulling you in for a kiss that has you grinding against his thighs before you can even catch your breath.
you've never been kissed like this. the few kisses you've had before have been with partners who see you as a means to an end, be it for your family name, your reputation, or just for sex. you've never been kissed by someone who seems to get more from your pleasure than from his own.
you now know he meant it when he said he's been picturing this.
you kiss him for as long as you can, and you're not sure if it's for seconds, minutes, hours. you kiss him until there's a heat burning between your thighs you can no longer stand, that you need to have satiated by the visible, prominent bulge in the front of his suit pants.
when you finally break away, lips numb and kiss-slick, nanami's hair is touselled - you don't remember running your hands through them, but you must have at some point - and he reaches up to run his fingers under the straps of your slip, asking with his eyes if he can guide them off your shoulders.
you nod, and your chest is exposed to the cool night air for a split second before nanami's mouth is on one of your nipples, tongue circling the sensitive skin and making you cry out.
one of the words you moan must be his name, because you feel him smile as he turns his attention towards the other nipple, hands now at the small of your back to keep you close to him.
you can't take it much longer. you need to be touched so badly, you didn't even think you were capable of wanting it this much -- and you only want him to do it, now and maybe forever.
maybe he can read your mind or maybe you babbled out the request, but nanami finally takes pity on you, giving your nipple one final lick before resting his shoulders back against the cushion of the armrest and sliding his hands up your thighs, hooking your underwear with his fingers -- you lift your hips up to let him slip them off.
his composure slips further when he finally touches you between your legs, feeling how wet you've gotten for him, seeing how you react when he slips his index finger inside.
your head falls back and you hold a breath, focusing all of your attention on the sensation of him inside you, on the way he curls the digit ever-so-slightly before pulling it out and fucking you with two this time, almost -- almost -- tipping you over the edge.
"such a pretty wife," he mumbles almost under his breath, voice and gaze reverent as he watches you rock yourself against his hand. "my beautiful, perfect wife, aren't you?"
you want to answer him but can't, lungs feeling near-empty as you fumble with the buttons of his pants.
"i will never be able to think of anything else but you, i think," he muses, half-smiling. "you in my lap ... you making those pretty little noises ... i might be a ruined man, you know. and I'm glad of it."
he only stops speaking when you finally get your hand on his clothed cock, his breath catching in his throat as you trace it with your fingers.
you want tonight, the first of many times together, to start with you cumming on your husband's cock.
nanami just watches as you finally pull him out of his underwear, his length thick and hard in your hand as you give it a few messy strokes. it's all the both of you can manage before you need to have it inside you -- you shift your hips to sit on it, nanami's eyes fixed on the site of the head slipping inside.
it's a stretch, as you expected, but one you've been craving since you closed the bedroom door. you take him inch by inch, lowering yourself down as his breath quickens, clearly battling the urge to thrust up inside you.
but he's careful with you, and doesn't want to hurt you. his wife.
you lift yourself up too much and his cock slips out, slapping aginst his stomach and you nearly cry at the sudden emptiness, eager and clumsy as you guide him back inside you.
he kisses you when you sink down next, tongue massaging your own until the feeling of almost-too-full turns to a perfect, satisfying heat in your core.
eventually you're ready to quicken the pace, bouncing on his cock before long, your mind working too fast for you to keep up as you see nanami's cheekbones flush pink, his pupils dark as you ride him until your thighs ache.
you power through the sensation, nanami helping you along by meeting your hips with his, his thumb tracing uneven circles on your puffy clit. he calls you perfect and other beautiful words; you don't say anything besides more, more and, soon after, nearly there, nearly there, please, please, I'm so close --
your entire body lights up with the most wonderful sensation, hitting you like a wave and sweeping you away in its warm glow, with nanami's hands now on your hips, guiding your movements in exactly the way you need it -- not too hard, not too slow, not too fast.
you're still pulsing around him when you feel his body stiffen, his strong thighs tensing as he groans through gritted teeth. he pulls you in for a crushing kiss as he finishes, filling you up and thrusting as deep as he can until oversensitivity takes over.
the afterglow has you a contented and exhausted mess, muscles aching but satisfied in a way you'll spend forever seeking.
reluctantly, you slip off his cock to retake your place on his lap, marvelling at how undone you both have become, a far cry from your perfect wedding appearance.
you look perfect to him, though, you know as much from the kiss he presses to your sweaty forehead and the way his arm wraps around your shoulders.
"we didn't even make it to the bed," you observe, eyebrows raising as you finally return to your own body. "i ... wasn't expecting that."
"we have a lifetime to spend in bed," he replies, a smile in his voice.
and once again, for reasons you still don't understand, you believe him.
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