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arilevenatz · 3 months ago

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Chasing Shadows

Pairing: popular guy!yeosang x chubby!fem!reader

Genre: Angst (?), fluff

Word count: 5.3k

Warnings: kinda frat boy yeosang, him and his friends are handsome (yes that's a warning), reader has anxiety, she is also insecure, anxiety attacks, yeo is cheeky, like really cheeky, you might wanna flick him a bit, bestfriend! San and wooyoung, suicide mentioned, lmk if I missed any!!

AN: y'all bear with me this is my first time posting on Tumblr, I'm still figuring out stuff. I had a dream about this and I decided that I'm gonna write a yeo fic. And also please reblog and like, so I can get more motivated!!

Masterlist

Yeosang was a quiet and smart guy in the class. He used to talk only when spoken to. Except his little friend group, well maybe not so little. All the students seem to respect him of some sort. He and his group almost seemed, untouchable. Not like they were the popular group or something. Neither were they hostile. They were just really handsome. The whole group looked like they walked out of a movie set of a kdrama.

You were not new to this. But not particularly known as well. Honestly you didn't care. You stopped caring since high school. The only thing you knew about him was that he was a guy from a group.....and he was good at maths. You were a normal student, yes, maybe you scored the top score in Psychology in your college anyone has ever had, but that's just irrelevant right? In the end, nobody cares.

But you were wrong, he cares. So much so that he came and sat beside you in English class. Not particularly unlikely for someone to sit beside you. You usually didn't even care. But he isn't just somebody. He is the Yeosang. The same guy that all the girls swooned over just cuz he showed his birthmark. What's so impressive about birthmarks anyway? It's just a mark.

At first, you didn't care. But then it started to repeat. Everyday he would come and sit beside you (cause language classes were mandatory everyday) and heck you were not liking the attention you were getting.

"Hey, you should not get close to yeosang or anyone in their group. I heard they are gangsters" "I heard they are no good" "They are in a satanic cult where they sell their souls to the devil to live for eternity!!"

Yeah needless to say people had some crazy rumours about them. You? you didn't care. And also who the fuck would sell their soul to live forever. You'd rather do that to die painlessly, cause life. But for some reason, they seem to keep their distance from the group but admire them from afar. Almost as if they are scared of them.

Anyway people are quick to come to conclusions. But you were not like that. You were annoyed. Like why the fuck you sitting next to me dude go away. But of course you're an unproud introvert. You can't just tell him to leave that's rude. So you did the next best thing. Just sit somewhere else. If he really liked that seat, he could have his nook. You're gonna go and distance yourself. Not cause you are scared of him, but you know just to be careful. (Keep gaslighting yourself queen)

Yeosang walks into the classroom and scans the big room, his eyes narrowing as he doesn't see you in your usual seat. His headphones in he hesitantly approaches the desk where you're now sitting and pulls out the chair beside you, sitting down heavily. You mentally slap your forehead. This really is helping your reputation.

Yeosang looks at you with a raised eyebrow, clearly confused. He glances around the room, noticing the other students staring at you both. After a moment of silence, he turns back to you and notices your ears are red. He asks in a low tone, "What's going on? Why are you sitting somewhere else today?" Wow he's talking to me now

Yeosang gaze stills, and he leans back in his chair, crossing his arms over his chest. "You're avoiding me because of what people are saying about me, isn't it?" His voice is deep, but oddly quiet. It was something you've never heard before. And you couldn't pinpoint his emotions.

"Well kinda. But that doesn't mean I actually believe them. I just don't like people." You say thinking you weirded him out and hoping he'll leave you alone assuming you're an antisocial animal.

A flicker of something passes through Yeosang's eyes at your blunt response. He uncrosses his arms and leans forward, his elbows resting on the desk. "I get it. You don't trust easily. Neither do I." He pauses, considering his words carefully. Bro stop talking to me ?!

You don't react to his words and just look at the front. Your whole face feels warm. It's that feeling you get when you're embarrassed. Feeling everyone's eyes on you. You felt anxious, thinking everyone was judging you. You hate this feeling. You felt exposed to everyone. Even though they don't give two shits about you. It's that bubbling feeling inside the pit of your stomach. The heaviness in your chest. That shakiness in your hands and legs. You really felt like it would be nice if the floor split in half and eat you alive.

The class finish and you quickly pack up and leave, avoiding him again. Yeosang watches you rush out the door without a backward glance. His looks at your leaving figure with a thoughtful expression. The next day, he arrives early to claim the seat next to you again, determined to break through your walls.

As the class enters, Yeosang is already seated in your usual spot, his arms crossed and pen spinning in his hand. His presence seems to command the attention of the room, but he pays no mind to the whispers or curious glances directed at him. Instead, his focus is fixed on the doorway, waiting for your arrival. When you finally enter, he notices how you hesitate at the sight of him already occupying your seat. It was then when he looked down and started to scribble something in his notebook. You try to skip the vacant seat beside him and go further behind but he reaches out and grabs your backpack, pulling it onto the empty seat beside him. He continues to write, his pen scratching against the paper in a steady rhythm. After a moment, he glances up and meets your gaze, his expression unreadable. "You're late".

You sit down quietly, take off your glasses and rub your face, ignoring him. Here we go again, I'm tired of this shit.. What does a girl do to have some peace? Witnessing your frustration, a slight smile appears on his lips as he reaches for your glasses. "Hey," he says in a low voice, just audible enough for you to hear. His fingers brush against yours as he takes the glasses from your hand, then deliberately places them back on your face, adjusting them slightly. "Wear them"

The teacher comes in and starts to teach. You sit there, staring blankly at the teacher writing on the board, but your mind is elsewhere. You replay the moment he adjusted your glasses, trying to read into his expression. You begin to imagine that he looked disgusted, that he must think you're hideous without your glasses on. You can't help but feel self-conscious. You catch yourself unconsciously touching your glasses, as if to double-check they're still there. You imagine him whispering to his friends about how ugly you look without them, how he's only sitting next to you as a joke. You felt yourself picking at your finger nails, your legs bouncing up and down continuously with the approaching thoughts.

During a brief moment when the teacher turns away to write on the board, Yeosang leans in closer to you. His voice is low and barely audible, "Stop picking at your nails, it's distracting" He says it bluntly, without any real malice, before returning his attention to the lecture.

"Im sorry" you apologise quietly. Wait why the fuck did I apologise, I did nothing wrong.

Over the next few days, a pattern emerges. Yeosang continues to sit next to you in class, trying to engage in conversation, but you always find a way to shut him down or quickly change the subject. He notices that you avoid him between classes, always taking a different route. You think it's working, driving him away slowly. Maybe he'll realise you really are weird and will leave you alone. But something quite opposite happens.

Yeosang starts to get frustrated with the constant rebuffs. He can't understand why you're so hostile towards him, especially since he's trying to be friendly. One day, as you're walking down the hallway, he blocks your path, forcing you to stop and look at him. "What's your problem?"

"What is your problem?" You say, as he blocks your path with his body. "My problem? You're the one who's been acting like I've got a disease every time I try to talk to you." You open your mouth to say something but he beats you to it. "You're always shutting me down, avoiding me, and picking at those damn nails of yours. It's like you can't stand my presence."

You look down, sighing loudly and look up to him. "Then take the damn sign man, I don't wanna talk to you or engage in any activity that involves you" yeah that'll do, that gotta be the most rude thing you say to anyone, that'll definitely shoo him off. But again, the universe says fuck you and the opposite happens. Yeosang's eyes widen in surprise at your blunt words. For a moment, he stares at you, his expression unreadable. Then, unexpectedly, he bursts into laughter - a deep, genuine sound that echoes through the hallway. This fucker-

"What's so funny?" you ask, clearly embarrassed. Yeosang continues to laugh, his shoulders shaking as he looks you up and down. When he finally composes himself, he wipes tears from his eyes and says, "Damn, I like you even more now. You're fucking hilarious. Alright, fine, I'll take the sign."

He did not take the sign. Yes he did stop directly talking to me, but he won't actually leave me alone. He is still in the shadows. He stopped sitting beside me but went behind me. He stopped walking with me but started following me around.

Yeosang finds your stubborn refusal to engage endearing rather than frustrating. Instead of backing off as you hoped, he shifts tactics. He maintains a subtle presence in your peripheral vision. You catch glimpses of him behind you in class, always watching. At lunch one day, yeosang casually sits at the table next to yours with a group of his friends. He doesn't look at you directly, but you can feel his eyes flicking in your direction

Yeosang's friends chat with him, but he only half-listens, his attention constantly drifting to you. He murmurs something to them, and they glance over at you, exchanging curious looks. His friend, wooyoung asks him "yo man, how's your pursuing that girl going?" Another guy, San, says "I don't know if you can call it pursuing dawg, all he does is follow the girl around the college like a creep." Wooyoung pops a cookie in his mouth and says "Damn man, I didn't know you were like this"

"Shut up about her." His tone is casual, but there's an edge to it - protectiveness almost. He keeps his voice low enough that only they can hear, "She's... different. Fuck, I don't know why, but she's got me twisted up." Wooyoung grins mischievously, "Ah ha! You're falling for her aren't you? You're actually trying to chase a girl who isn't subtly throwing herself at you." He laughs, nudging yeosang's arm. "But that's not really gonna work is it? you need to fucking commit to it"

Yeosang's expression darkens slightly, his eyes narrowing. He takes a swig of his soda before responding, "What do you suggest then, genius? You think I should just walk up to her and...?" He leaves the sentence hanging, waiting for Wooyoung's input. "Yes, you should" San says without missing a beat. San's straightforward approach makes him smirk, but a flash of uncertainty crosses his face. "And what if she..." He pauses, running a hand through his styled hair "... what if she thinks I'm weird?" His eyes shift in your direction for a brief moment before focusing back on his friends. "Bruh, the way you've been acting all these days, she probably already thinks of you like that by now"

Yeosang scoffs, shaking his head disbelievingly. "Fuck, when you put it like that..." He leans back in his chair, crossing his muscular arms over his chest, his silver chain catching the light. "Maybe it's time to switch things up then."

The library is large and quiet, with tall bookshelves filling the room. The shelves are packed with books of all colors. Sunlight shines through colorful windows, making pretty patterns on the floor. A few students sit quietly, reading or studying. It's a peaceful place to think and learn. As you enter the library, the usual silence is interrupted only by the rustling of pages and the occasional whisper. You find a quiet corner to sit down and start reading. After a few minutes, you hear footsteps approaching. You don't pay much attention, assuming it's just another student.

You felt them sit down across from you. Your body tenses slightly as you notice the movement, causing you to glance up from your book. Through your peripheral vision, you catch sight of the person who just sat down across from you - it's him again. It's been weeks since he has been silently following you around, but now he approached you again.

His presence looms oddly, a juxtaposition in this sanctum of silence. He gazes at you, an unreadable expression on his chiseled face, his fingers absentmindedly tracing the cover of a thick tome he's brought with him. "Hey." You answered him silently "hey...." He leans forward slightly, the movement causing the leather of his jacket to creak softly. "Look... I know you probably think I'm being kinda creepy and shit..." He runs a hand through his messy dark hair, looking uncomfortable for once, unlike his usual composed demeanor.

He takes a deep breath, as if gathering his thoughts. "I just... I wanted to talk to you, ya know? You're different from the other girls at school. You're always so... quiet, so focused on your books."

"You're so different, you're the most unique girl I've ever met. You're my type, are you gonna say this? All those lame shit people say in movies? Please stop mocking me" His expression freezes for a moment, caught off guard by your blunt response. Then, to your surprise, he lets out a low, genuine laugh. "Shit, you're right. That was cheesy as hell." He shakes his head, a small smirk playing on his lips. You were listening to him. But something inside you stirred and you felt angry. You remembered all those times those people in middle and high school bullied you. All those times you felt that every time you entered the room, everyone looked at your body and you felt insecure. All those times your family members indirectly forced you to believe that you can only be loved when you lose weight. And you snapped. "stop mocking me. I know people like you. you guys go up to girls like me and say you like them only to say 'April fools' or say 'its a dare' later. I hate guys like you"

His grin fades, his expression turning serious, but his eyes still hold a glint of mischief. "You really think that's what I'm doing?" He tilts his head to the side, studying your face intently. He maintains eye contact, his expression unreadable. He sees the suspicion in your eyes, and it only seems to fuel his mischievous glint. He leans forward, his voice lowering. "Let me ask you something..." He studies your face intently, a slight smirk playing on his lips. "First off... do I look like I have a problem finding girls to talk to?" He gestures to himself, a hint of pride in his tone. "And second..." His voice drops lower as he deliberately maintains eye contact. "Second what?" You shout.

"No shouting in the library student!" The librarian warned you. You sit back down embarrassed and all red.

He laughs a little and says "Second, would I really waste my time pretending to like someone just to play an April Fool's prank?" His words send a shiver down your spine as he pulls back, his eyes never leaving yours. "Or maybe..." He looks at you with a half-smirk, half-serious expression "You're actually quite... interesting. Not many people stand up to me like you do." His eyes crinkle again as he studies your reaction "And hey..." He reaches over and lightly taps your finger. You retreat your hand from his touch. His expression shifts to a playful pout, though his eyes still hold a glint of amusement "Wow, so I'm not even worthy of a tiny hand tap?" You shake your head as a 'No'. He leans back in his chair, studying your defensive posture with interest "You're not scared of me, are you?" He chuckles low in his throat, his gaze never leaving yours even though you fail to keep eye contact, "listen, can I not just like you? I like you. I want to be with you"

"No! people don't simply like girls like me" you felt like crying, but you can't. His expression turns mockingly serious, his eyes crinkling at the corners. "Oh, so you're saying you're not likeable? You think I can't like you because you're... what?" He crosses his arms, leaning forward again, his curiosity piqued. You were getting annoyed.

"You know what I am"

"No I don't"

"Fuck. Fine! Im fat and ugly"

His face freezes and for a moment, he looks genuinely shocked. But then, he lets out a harsh laugh. "Fat and ugly? He shakes his head, his gaze raking over your form appraisingly. "You really think that's what I see when I look at you?"

"You don't need to look at me like that, I am like that so fuck off I don't need you laughing at my face."

You stand up harshly, take your bag and walk outside the library. He follows you and grabs your upper arm, not harshly but firmly enough to hold your attention. "Listen carefully..." His voice softens, losing its usual mocking tone. "I'm not some creep who goes around lying to get in girls' pants." You open your mouth to say something but he quickly shuts you off. "You know what I see when I look at you? I see someone who's honest, even if it hurts. I see someone who's strong, even when they feel weak. And I see someone who's fucking beautiful, inside and out."

"Everyone says that but that's actually never true!"

"Then tell me, what do you see when you look in the mirror? Because whoever made you believe these lies about yourself? That person's fucking blind."

"Im not about to start talking to you as if you're my therapist. You let me go"

He loosens the grip but still holds onto your hand. "Alright, But just so we're clear? You're not fat, and you're definitely not ugly. You can tell me why you feel that way"

You wriggle your hand out of his hold and finally look at him. You've had enough.

"Fine, you wanna know? I am chubby, and I'm ok with that, I have no problem being chubby. it's just tiring for me because ppl always make it seem like I'm some disgusting things that doesn't deserve humanity" you take a breath and star again, "And you cannot say anything to me because you wanted this, you wanted me to say all these"

You look down, feeling defeated. It's so weird to word these things to someone, considering you had no one growing up. No siblings, no bestfriends, no close cousins. Even your parents never listened or talked to you about how you felt. You were truly tired. You felt two hands hold your shoulder. You look up, and it's Yeosang.

"People are fucking idiots. And the fact that you're okay with being yourself makes you hotter than anyone who tries to fit into some bullshit beauty standard." His jaw clenches at your words, a hint of something flashing in his eyes. He looked angry.

"Those assholes can keep their narrow-minded opinions. Because someone who stands up for themselves like you just did? Someone who owns their worth instead of begging for validation"

His gaze intensifies, filled with a newfound respect and... something deeper. "That's the kind of person who deserves to be cherished. And anyone who can't see that? They're the ones who are fucking ugly, inside and out."

He sees the unspoken acknowledgment in your eyes, the silent absorption of his words. It's the first time he's seen you listen so intently, without pushing him away or rolling your eyes. He swallows hard, realizing the power of his words on you.

His monologue ended. And it was everything you wanted to hear all these days. The words you wanted your parents to say to you, the words you needed. He said everything. It was the first time in a while you felt like you can actually believe someone. But you were not like this. Circumstances made you so that you push away everyone. And that has become your nature. If I can push them away before they can, I won't be hurt.

"I appreciate your words towards me, but I don't know anything about your confession. I-I don't think so I can accept it"

He nods slowly, a small smile playing on his lips. "I get it. It's a lot to take in, especially coming from a person like me." He leans in closer, his voice dropping to a conspiratorial whisper. "Tell you what - how about I show you my worth?"

You look up at him, bewildered. What does he want. Is he crazy? Has he lost his marbles? Is he that bored? All these questions flood your mind but only one thing slips out of your mouth, "huh?" His smile grows wider, a spark of mischief in his eyes. "You know, prove to you that I'm not just some dumb guy who talks big." He pauses, studying your face. "I'll do something for you. Something that shows you I'm more than just words. I'll court you"

You were speechless. "I-I don't need-"

He puts a finger on your lips to shut you up. "Let me finish," He says, his tone leaving no room for argument. "I'm not doing this to pressure you or anything stupid like that. I just want a chance to show you who I really am, beyond the tough act."

Looking at your eyes, he realised how hurt you were. He exhales slowly, a hint of vulnerability in his eyes that he rarely lets anyone see. "I know I'm not the prince charming type. But maybe that's a good thing. Maybe you deserve someone who fights for you, who understands the real world and all its fucked up beauty."

The next day, as you walk into college, you catch him standing beside the gate. Wearing his signature black attire with silver accessories. As you walked towards the gate, he saw you and he got off the wall and walked towards you. He stops in front of you, his hands in his pockets as he looks down at you with a small smile. "Morning," He says, his voice casual but with an underlying warmth. "I was waiting for you."

"Good morning" you look around and see people look at you for a moment and then look away. It made your face feel hot from embarrassment.

He holds your cheeks and moves your face towards him "don't look at them. ignore them" You both start walking towards the class. As they walk side by side, Yeosang couldn't help but let out a light chuckle, shaking his head slightly. "You know, I never thought I'd be one for this whole 'gentleman' thing. But here I am, walking you to class like some corny love story."

You were quick with your answer, "You wanted this. I'm positive by the end of this week, you won't want to be with me"

His smile fades a bit at your words, a hint of seriousness entering his eyes. "And why's that?" He asks, his voice low and even. "You think you're that hard to handle?" He smirks, but there's an underlying challenge in his gaze. You wait for him, to say further, but he waits for your answer. You look to the side, taking in a breath and say "Yes."

He stops walking abruptly, turning to face you directly. His expression is intense, a blend of amusement and determination. "Well, guess what? I've dealt with thorns, I've tangled with barbs, I've faced off against the sharpest minds and the coldest hearts."

You stare at him for a while and then "damn you really did become philosophical"

He barks out a short, surprised laugh, shaking his head as he starts walking again, this time more aggressively. "Philosophical? Nah, just stating facts." He glances at you sideways, a mischievous glint in his eye. You shake your head and follow him to the class.

Over the next few days, Yeosang continues to act like your doting boyfriend, much to the confusion and entertainment of your classmates. He walks you to class, sits with you at lunch, and even "accidentally" brushes your hands during lessons.

After school one day, he suddenly grabs your hand and starts dragging you towards the nearby ice cream shop. When you resist, he stops and turns to face you with a stubborn expression. "Come on, I'm buying you ice cream. Don't make a scene."

"I don't want ice cream"

He ignores your protests, opening the door to the ice cream shop and practically pushing you inside. "you're getting it anyway, pick a flavour"

Eventually you were forced to have a large ice cream cone with chocolate and Butter scotch, your two favourite flavours.

You both start walking towards your house "I don't like when people spend money on me" He shrugs it off, "Too bad, I spent the money anyway." He says nonchalantly, walking beside you with his hands shoved in his pockets. As you get closer to your house, he pauses and looks at you sideways, "You going to invite me in now?"

He wants to come inside my house now?

"in my house? My mom's in the house"

He looks at the door for a bit, then "how about I talk to my future mom in law beforehand and ask for her daughter's hand in marriage now." and walk right in as you had unlocked the door. You run to stop him but the damage was already done.

Yeosang finds himself standing in a neat, tidy living room. A woman with short, dark hair and piercing eyes is sitting on the couch, reading a book. She looks up as he enters and her gaze locks onto him. For a moment, Yeosang is taken aback by the intensity of her stare.

You trail behind, shocked by the ongoing staring contest between them.

He clears his throat professionally, straightening his posture "Good evening ma'am. I'm Kang Yeosang, your daughter's classmate. I was hoping we could have a word." He maintains a polite, respectful tone despite his usual confident demeanor, feeling the weight of this mother's presence.

The woman closes her book and places it on the coffee table. She stands up slowly, her eyes never leaving Yeosang's face. "You're yeosang" she states, her voice cold and calculated. "Sit down," she instructs, gesturing to the chair across from her. He moves to sit down carefully, maintaining eye contact with her while keeping his body language respectful. His usual charm falters slightly in the face of her stern presence. "I promise, I have the best intentions with your daughter."

Your mom raises an eyebrow skeptically as she leans forward, elbows resting on her knees. "that's for me to decide"

Shit yeosang thinks.

He takes a deep breath, leaning back slightly and offering what he hopes is a disarming smile. "Of course, ma'am. I wouldn't dream of imposing or presuming anything." He glances around the room, noting that there are no family pictures nor unnecessary decor. Noticing the notably stern air and lack of familial photographs surrounding him, yeosang's confidence dips even further. He shifts uncomfortably in his seat, suddenly wishing he had practiced this conversation in more depth. "I, uh... I truly care about her, ma'am."

"I understand that but what is it that you want?" Your mother asks him softly but with an underlying aggression.

He takes a deep breath, gathering his thoughts before speaking. "I mean, ma'am, that I have developed strong feelings for your daughter. I respect and admire her greatly, and I would like the opportunity to pursue a relationship with her, with your blessing and guidance."

Honestly, if you had popcorn, you'd be very entertained. Kinda well if you exclude the part that you might get your ass whooped after he leaves creating a big mess. But you hold your breath.

Your mother's expression remains unreadable, her eyes scrutinizing Yeosang intently. "You're asking for my permission to date my daughter?" She asks flatly, her tone leaving no room for misinterpretation.

he nods "yes ma'am"

She steeples her fingers, tapping her index fingers thoughtfully against her lips. "I see." She sits back in her chair, her eyes narrowing slightly. "Tell me, yeosang, how can I let my daughter be with you, if I don't know anything about your future, family. I don't want her to have a miserable life and for that you need to have a job"

"yes ma'am. That's why I have everything sorted out. Im good ataths and have dreams of persuing higher Education in it. if not I have intrest in becoming a professor. and if that fails as well, I have my father's company. but ofcourse, that is the last option"

Damn that was kinda hot. Wait, brain, wtf?

Your mother nods slowly, seeming to consider his words carefully. "A good education and a solid career path. Those are important things for a man to have." She pauses, her gaze drifting to the door for a moment before snapping back at him. "But tell me, yeosang"

"Are you prepared to handle the pressure and responsibilities that come with being in a relationship with my daughter? she has been severely depressed and suicidal for the past 8 years after her dad lost everything and committed suicide" Her voice is firm, leaving no room for argument.

You felt betrayed, by your own mother. You were shocked, hurt and mostly, sad that she exposed this. You were always reserved about your feelings, shutting them off from everybody. But hearing this made you felt exposed, naked almost

Yeosang's expression softens as he realizes the gravity of your situation. He leans forward earnestly, his eyes filled with sincerity and determination. "Ma'am, I understand completely. I know I'm asking for a big responsibility. But please believe me when I say that I'm ready to stand by your daughter through thick and thin. I have experience dealing with mental health issues, as my own aunt struggled with depression for years. I know it's not an easy path, but I'm committed to supporting and loving her unconditionally."

Your mother studies him intently, her hard exterior cracking slightly to reveal a glimmer of hope and relief in her eyes. "You're a good man, Yeosang. Most boys your age would run away screaming at the thought of dealing with something like this"

He shrugs and says something that made your eyes tear,

"I love her ma'am"

Your mother's expression softens further, a rare smile tugging at her lips. "I can see that you truly care for my daughter. That's the most important thing to me." She pauses, her mind made up. "You have my blessing to date my daughter, Yeosang."

AN: whooo I got this done guys clap in the comments. I hope y'all enjoyed this and if you did, please reblog so I can reach even more people. I love yalllll

267 notes · View notes

archangeldyke-all · 3 months ago

Note

hope you're feeling better by the ghosting! Lesbian dating scene is hard out here 😭 have an ask if you're up for it. Or you can just listen abt this scenario I have, totally fine either way just wanna let these thoughts out. And you're my fav sevika writer so! It's a bit angsty/comfort ig? Basically Sevika explaining to reader why it's such a struggle to say "I love you".

Not just because it's an admission of feelings for such a character but I think it's also cuz loving someone also means you have to accept anything could happen to either of them, esp since Zaun and her job are quite dangerous. So saying those 3 words feels like accepting that risk and continue on which is a big thing to do, it's like willingly leaving yourself open to potential heartaches. Idk just recently saw posts about how love is not just a feeling but also a choice, whether to stay/commit/any other reason the person feels what love is. Felt like if the reader is the first thing she's ever cared about and don't wanna lose her (whether it's a breakup, death etc,), she would struggle saying it cuz it feels like accepting that risk which she doesn't want to. She would still make up for it by showing her love & appreciation thru other means tho! Mb the reader had anxious thoughts on whether she reciprocated, or Sevika feels bad for not saying back for so long that she felt like she has to explain why she's struggling.

Sorry if I'm rambling too long 😅 hope you have a great year ahead, love your writing as well! ❤️

i love this sm <33

men and minors dni

even though you've lived in zaun your whole life, you understand that your life's been a lot softer than it could've been.

you've never had to worry about where you'll sleep at night-- you've always had a dry, warm bed to rest in.

you've gone hungry some nights, but you're lucky enough to have never gone more than a few days without a warm meal.

and your choice in career keeps you out of the line of danger; safe and inside most of the day, home before sunset each night.

so, while you're zaunite enough to know how to keep your head down and mind your own business, you understand that for most people life's a lot scarier.

sevika's one of those people.

sevika's known grief for almost as long as she's known how to talk. she's spent her fair share of nights in the cold, and she's gone to bed hungry more often than she's gone to bed full and satisfied. plus, sevika's dedicated her life to being a revolutionary. which means sevika has a lot of enemies.

so it's no surprise that lovey-dovey words come easier for you than they do for sevika.

it isn't until two years into your relationship that you realize she's never said she loves you. sevika has to be the one to point it out.

"i think i gotta call it an early night, baby. you stay up and finish the movie." you say around a yawn, leaning forward to kiss your girlfriend on the couch. sevika pouts.

"just sleep on top of me here." she requests. you snort.

"you'll throw your back out carrying me to bed."

"that's just offensive. i could lift three of you." sevika's pout worsens. "goodnight." she huffs. "give me another kiss."

you laugh and roll your eyes. "i love you." you say with exasperation as you lean in to kiss her. sevika stiffens against you. you pull away to study her face. "'s wrong?"

"you always say that." sevika whispers. you raise an eyebrow at her, climbing into her lap to hold her face between your hands.

"well, yeah. 'cause i do."

"i know." sevika says with a tiny smile. it makes your heart flutter. it's quiet for a moment as you wait patiently for your girl to gather her words. eventually, sevika sighs. "does it ever bother you that i don't say that to you?" she asks.

you frown in confusion. "what, that you love me?" you ask. sevika nods. you sputter a laugh. "yes you do, you say it all the time." you scoff.

sevika blinks up at you in shock. "no i don't." she says. "baby, i've never said it. to anyone. ever."

oh. well, that's surprising. you furrow your brow as you try to recall an instance where your girlfriend let the words slip, and you're shocked to realize that she, in fact, has not. "oh." you say.

sevika gulps. "does that... is that bad?" she asks.

you blink down at her, and your heart shatters. "oh, baby, no." you coo, kissing her frown. "no, that's not bad."

"but-- i should be able--"

"darling, i know you love me." you cut her off. sevika blushes almost as red as she did the first time she saw your tits. you smile, brushing your thumbs over her crimson cheeks. "you make that very clear."

"yeah but i--"

"you moved me into your sacred bachlorette pad three months into us meeting. yesterday, you came home from work with a stab wound, and tried to make me dinner before patching yourself up."

"it was just a scratch."

"i'm not finished. you call me stupid shit like sweetbean and cookie-- and you do it in front of other people! you! sevika; the scary lady of zaun!" she chuckles a little bit at this. "sevika, i didn't even realize you hadn't said it until you told me just now." you kiss her nose. "it's not bad."

sevika leans forward to bury her face against your neck, inhaling deeply. "i just... i want to say it." she whispers. you nod. "i wish i could say it like you do; just, whenever i feel it." god she's romantic. you choke back your own tears as you kiss her scalp. "but... if i say it..." sevika trails off.

"if you say it, it makes it real." you whisper, nodding. "it makes it somethin' you can lose." you can feel her hot tears on your throat. you don't mention it.

"y-yeah." she whispers shakily, her hands clutching at your hips desperately. "and i can't lose you."

"you won't baby. even if the worst happens, i'm yours forever. i'll haunt the shit outta you." this pulls a startled laugh out of her, and you grin. "you don't have to say it for the rest of our lives, if you can't. i won't mind. just as long as we're together."

and that settles it.

for a while...

sevika starts practicing.

she'll spell it out to you, 'i l-o-v-e you, baby.' or she'll whisper it to you when she thinks you're sleeping.

at the three year mark, sevika can say it when she's drunk enough. it's fucking adorable.

"i have somethin' import'nt' t' tell you..." she says with a waggle of her eyebrows. you burst into laughter.

"oh, do you?" you ask.

"mmhmm. look." sevika darts forward to peck your lips, then pulls back with a proud smile. "i love'ya." she slurs. you grin.

"i love you too, baby."

"an' if this jinxes everythin' and y' die-- y' gotta make the haunting obvious 'kay?" she asks. you cackle.

"alright, love."

by the time you're married, the words are almost compulsive for her. sevika can't leave a room without shooting a 'love you' over her shoulder at you. even if you're arguing.

"oh, so you've conveniently got a fuckin' 'meeting' in the middle of the night, on your night to do fuckin' dishes?! if you don't get in the kitchen and grab the sponge right now you're sleeping on the couch!"

"it's six pm, it's a dinner meeting! i'll do the dishes when i get back! you act like i'm fuckin' negligent, but you're the one who doesn't know how to properly clean a fuckin' toilet! janna, you annoy me-- i love you, i'll be back by midnight!" she huffs as she slams the door behind her.

despite how pissed you are-- you can't help but smile a bit at her words.

taglist!

@fyeahnix @lavendersgirl @half-of-a-gay @thesevi0lentdelights @sexysapphicshopowner

@kissyslut @chuucanchuucan @badbye666 @femme-historian @lia-winther

@lavenderbabu @emiliabby @sevikasbeloved @hellorai @my-taintedheart

@glass-apothecary @macaroni676 @artinvain @k3n-dyll @sevsdollette

@ellieslob @xayn-xd @keikuahh @maneskinwh0re @raphaellearp

@iamastar @sevikitty @mascdom @nhaaauyen @annesunshiner

@mirconreadzztuff22 @veoomvroom @lushh-s3vik4s @katyawooga @lesbodietcoke

@strawberrykidneystone @sevikasfan @fict1onallyobsessed @dvrkhcld @sweetybuzz25

@sluttysierraaa @snake-in-a-flower-crown @ruiwonderz @littlemisszaunite @biblicalcrybaby

@blackgaladriel @nightlyconfusion @dancingqu33n17

#sevika #sevika arcane #sevika imagine #sevika x reader #sevika x you #soft sevika

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rhiannonsknife · 3 months ago

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While rewatching yj i was thinking about what if Jackie became our friend while being stuck in wilderness.

She never talked to us before, maybe just a few times in practice or in class. But she literally has no one out there since everyone has turned their backs on her. So what if we start talking to her, make her do some chores to make her fit in and standing up for her when someone bashes her. And then you guys make fun of whatever cult-related thing that’s going on.

I feel like Jackie would cherish that and she really just needs someone to be girling with out there cuz she’s all lonely and i wanna hug her soo bad.

this reminds me of how no one came out to comfort jackie after her fight with shauna :((( guys i would’ve been out there instantly!!

jackie slams the cabin door behind her as she storms out into the cold, the sound reverberating through the otherwise quiet room. inside, the tension is palpable: shauna standing stiff, everyone else awkwardly pretending they’re not watching. no one says a word. no one goes after her.

no one except for you. the moment she disappears into the dark, you’re already grabbing your jacket.

you’ve been watching jackie unravel for weeks, her usual confident demeanor cracking under the weight of the wilderness, the isolation, and now the fight with shauna. the final straw in a series of events that broke her slowly.

jackie’s not perfect, far from it. but is anyone out here? besides, she’s been your friend, or as close to a friend as anyone can have in this hellscape.

you’ve seen how everyone’s turned on her, how she struggled to keep up and you’re not about to let her do it alone.

"where are you going?” shauna asks sharply as you put your jacket on.

“to get her,” you say simply.

“she’ll come back,” someone mutters. you don’t even bother turning to see who.

“yeah?” you snap, halfway out the door. “and what if she doesn’t?”

the cold hits you like a slap as you step outside and move toward where you think she’s gone, calling her name.

“jackie! jackie, come on, it’s freezing out here!”

at first, there’s no answer, just the wind howling through the trees around. there’s no snow yet, but judging by the constantly dropping temperature, there will be soon. you keep going, your breath puffing out in visible clouds as you search. when you finally spot jackie, it’s by a log at the edge of the clearing. her arms are wrapped around her knees, her head bowed, and she’s shivering violently already. she doesn’t look up until you’re right in front of her.

“what are you doing here?”

“looking for you,” you reply, crouching down beside her. “what the hell are you thinking, sitting out here? it’s freezing”

“go back inside,” jackie says, brushing hair from her face. “i’m fine”

“you’re not fine,” you counter. “jackie, you’ll freeze to death out here. come back inside!”

her jaw tightens, and she looks away, her breath hitching. “why do you care? clearly the others don’t”

“that’s not true, they’re just-” you pause, trying to find the right words. “it’s not you they’re mad at, not really. it’s this…place. what it’s doing to us!”

jackie lets out a bitter laugh. “that’s not how it feels”

you don’t know what to say to that, so instead, you shift closer, wrapping your arm around her shoulders. she tenses but doesn’t pull away.

“i care,” you say quietly. “and i’m not gonna let you freeze out here just because things are hard”

she turns to look at you then, her eyes glassy, her cheeks flushed from the cold. finally, she swallows hard. “i don’t want to go back in there. i can’t”

“yes, you can,” you tell her firmly, giving her shoulders a squeeze. “i’ll be right there with you, okay? if anyone says anything, i’ll handle it. you don’t have to do this alone!”

jackie hesitates, but when another gust of wind sweeps through, she shivers and nods. you stand first, holding out your hand.

“come on,” you say, your tone soft but insistent. she stares at your hand before taking it, her grip surprisingly tight as you help her to her feet. you keep your arm around her as you guide her back toward the cabin, the warmth of your body pressed against hers.

when you open the cabin door, the room instantly falls silent. all eyes are on jackie as she steps inside, her chin lifted just slightly, trying to hold on to whatever pride she has left.

you don’t leave her side.

#jackie taylor Ღ #jackie taylor x reader #jackie taylor x female reader #jackie taylor x fem!reader #jackie taylor x you #yellowjackets #yellowjackets x reader #yellowjackets x female reader #yellowjackets x you

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crushedsweets · 5 months ago

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I need more of ur ben interpretation I luv him /p ☹️☹️

I think that early on in my timeline, Jeff Ben and Toby sorta formed a trio. And 90% of the time it was Jeff and Toby picking on ben until Ben would hack Toby’s phone and send a very risky text to Natalie. Eventually that trio falls apart and Toby connects better with nina nat and kate, while Ben and Jeff remain a duo

More Ben HCs under the cut, CW for mentions of murder, mutilation, suicide (but it’s nothing graphic)

I think Ben also helped Toby get over his fear of ghosts…

Also. I forgot to mention it in my other Ben post. But the guy who killed him and dressed him up like Link also stitched his ears into a point. Jeff thinks it’s sick and was thinking abt getting it done himself cuz Jeff is super into body mods (especially later into the story.)

I think Ben really genuinely sees Jeff like his older brother and he has an easy time ignoring the evil ass stuff Jeff does cuz… ben is a vengeful spirit who drove people to suicide cuz he was mad so he dgaf. But the difference between them is that Jeff does not give a single shit about hurting people he deems friends, while Ben does care. Jeff can’t hurt Ben so it doesn’t affect them directly, but when Ben starts seeing Jeff treat everyone like shit and stabbing Nina and getting into really bad fights with Toby and stuff.. he’s kinda like hmm… hence why he lets Toby kick Jeff’s ass, but he’s very firm on not letting anyone kill Jeff . Otherwise he’s leaking all sorts of shit to the authorities

It’s been so long since I’ve really talked deeply about my AU so I also just wanna regurgitate old Creeped lore. Ben is Really useful to the proxies cuz he can wipe police reports, files, CCTV footage, online forums, etc . WHICH IS WHY the proxies aren’t allowed to kill Jeff - cuz Ben said he’ll stop helping if they do.

Also this is totally just a plot convenience thing and makes no sense but I like to pretend ben is like a Wi-Fi box for the forest, hence why people can still use their phones miles into the woods away from society LMAOOO

When I have free time I wanna figure out a more specific meeting between Ben and Jeff. I’m thinking the cop that’s investigating Jeff’s case also covered Bens case and kept the cartridge that Bens Soul got trapped in. Maybe Jeff stole the cartridge after killing the cop and that’s why Ben started being like Hey. Give it back.? I dunno I gotta check my timeline to see if I can make this work LOL

He’s a cool kid I think. I really like him in my AU I wish I worked with him more…

#asks #Ben drowned #Jeff the killer #ticci toby #creeped

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deezneezz · 7 months ago

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Leona & ADD

I got a few ppl (on twitter) wanting me to elaborate on Leona and ADD, so I figured I will share my thoughts here as well, please be nice it's just a personal hc. You don't have to agree at all!! Since it contains some personal experiences I ask of people to please be kind about it!

Anyway, Leona and ADD.

I think a lot of people usually agree on Floyd and Kalim having ADHD, but Leona actually shows a lot of lesser talked about traits of ADHD. Namely Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (RSD), sensitivity to clothing/textures (he doesn't like restrictive clothes).

He also has the more commonly talked about traits of course, executive dysfunction being a big one. And his depression definitely exacerbates these traits, when i was undiagnosed and depressed i used to sleep my entire days away. I wasn't getting anything done anyway.

Not to mention not sleeping properly, so I was desperate to find moments to sleep during the day. I've slept on floors, on toilets, in an abandoned corner in uni instead of going to class. I was just *so* tired all the time I didn't want to sit in class, I wanted to sleep.

I was lucky I passed classes without studying, cause i would've never gotten through uni otherwise. I still took longer than necessary. The moment my support system (Ruggie, anyone?) graduated and left I had no one taking care of my basic needs, and I certainly didn't.

I had a dorm mate who cooked for me, made sure I had even an ounce of self-care, and also looked at my room and said "hmm, Deniz, maybe it's time to clean up a little" and then I very reluctantly admitted that it may have gotten a little out of hand.

She would just sit in my room sometimes chilling around while I cleaned cuz that was one of the few ways I cleaned at all (this is a real thing for ADHD, called body doubling. It works). Ruggie arriving at NRC and Leona suddenly performing tons better in school is no coincidence.

Coming back to RSD.. I mean I don't really have to explain it do I.. book 2, Lilia's scathing remarks, the shame of disappointing his dorm, etc. I know a lot of ppl call book 2 an 'overreaction' but like, this is genuinely what it feels like internally when RSD triggers

book 6 too, Jamil's over-protectiveness is clearly (to the audience) smth that's mostly Jamil's own habits and trauma doing. But to Leona it's a rejection/insult to his ability to take care of himself, his skill, etc. This was genuinely smth that set me off too.

"How dare you try to explain to me smth I already know, do you think I'm stupid?" "You're not like me." The unwillingness to admit that someone may be relatable in any way because making any comparison to yourself makes you vulnerable to what you haven't achieved for yourself.

"I would ace these classes too if I wasted my time and life studying as much as they did, but I actually love myself." <- guy who was jealous and did not know he was coping and didn't study cause of executive dysfunction and concentration issues.

Leona clearly knows a lot about the things he genuinely cares about, Ancient spell language, chess, magishift, so its kind of funny to see him so low effort in classes. Though honestly i know the game also says that "Leona already knows all this stuff" so.. who knows really...

Now I'm more chill but I used to legitimately go off the handle a little cuz RSD doesn't really care about whether the shit u feel is proportional to the offence it physically hurts in your chest and you just wanna burn down the world at that exact time and... IS THAT NOT LEONA...

TLDR: give Leona therapy and meds, lol.

#twisted wonderland #twst #leona kingscholar #hc #PLS BE NICE U DONT HAVE TO AGREE AT ALL <3

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lunajay33 · 7 months ago

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How to tell you I Love you🤎

Summary: Ever since meeting Daryl at the Farm you’ve grown to fall in love with him but how do you tell him your feelings without losing him as a friend?

Pairing: Daryl Dixon x f!reader

Age Gap

•Masterlist•

The day the Atlanta group came to my family farm it’s change my life, Daryl was a man of few words but he was passionate about the things he cared about, he was strong and the most handsome guy I’ve ever seen he made my knees weak, I know I’m younger, still 23 but I’m a woman who knows what she likes and Daryl Dixon is everything I want

I always took glances when he’d be working on his bike outside of the prison, seeing him all sweaty unfortunately he caught me many time

“Ya wanna help me darlin?” He asked handing out a wrench for me, feeling my face blush I sat next to him as he showed me how to tune up his bike and fix any loose bolts

“There ya go good girl” his praise had me weak like jelly stuttering over my words feeling his hand on my lower back

“Ummm…uh thank you D” I looked into his eyes for a while until I heard Carol call from behind us

“Y/n! Can I talk to you for a moment!” She yelled down by the gates

“Ummm I’ll see you later!” I said handing the wrench back and heading down to Carol

“Hey Carol is everything okay?”

“Oh yeah just wanted to talk to you about Mr.grumpy over there you seem pretty smitten with him” my heart thumped

“What? I don’t know what you’re talking about, we’re just friends”

“Hmm I don’t think he sees it that way and I don’t think you do either” her words struck me and I just couldn’t lie anymore

“Was it that obvious?” I ask twiddling with my fingers

“You’re perfect for eachother hun, I see the way you both light up when you’re together, why don’t you make a move”

“Carol come on look at him, he’s drop dead gorgeous he could get any woman he wants why would he want lil ol me?”

“Cuz yer my girl, wouldn’t want anyone else” I heard that gruff voice behind me

“Daryl what’re you doing here? What did you hear?”

“Enough sunshine, come on maybe we should go for a lil walk” he smirked as he held out his hand for me

His girl, finally his girl

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muwapsturniolo · 2 months ago

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No fucking way. So now they’re trying to donate to the LA fires but couldn’t find the decency to even acknowledge or be public about any other issue that was and has been happening? White men.

Imma be honest, this is the wrong blog and person to say this to.

LETS TALK ABOUT IT

Yes, they didn’t speak up about Palestine or other things that are going on. That has been a big topic in this fandom and I can understand why. You want the people you like to agree with your political opinions, to know that they aren’t against you and the people that need help. Unfortunately, the triplets aren’t going to speak up about Palestine because that is too political for them and I really doubt they understand everything fully. They should do their research, they should be educated, but they don’t HAVE to speak on it.

It would be nice if they did, but we shouldn’t be looking to celebrities, influencers, etc, to speak on issues that are bigger than them.

Again I understand wanting them to speak out, cuz I really hope they aren’t against Palestine, but what would the triplets speaking up do? Honestly what would it do? Majority of the world due to social media knows what’s going on, anyone who doesn’t know is younger and it’s not like a 13 year old who watches videos every Friday can donate money because the money is most likely their parents and who’s to say their parent stand with Palestine?

Also wanna add that Laura (hate that lady fr) most likely is against Palestine (look at who she voted for and the shit she says) she is probably telling them not to speak on it.

I’m also gonna say this cuz people getting mad at them speaking on the LA fires really has been irritating me.

They live in LA. They have friends and people they consider family in LA. OF COURSE they are going to speak on issues that affect them directly! Who wouldn’t? People were getting mad they didn’t speak on the fires ASAP, and then as soon as they did make posts, now it’s an issue.

People are never satisfied.

If they do speak are yall gonna be satisfied? Are yall gonna question if they donated or donated enough?

Now don’t get it twisted, I stand with Palestine, Congo, Sudan, and everywhere else that’s going through sum shit! But looking to influencers isn’t the place to look for change, talk to the actual politicians and powers that CAN make a change!!

Again, I do agree it would be nice for the triplets to speak up, it would let us know that they care and aren’t weird, but it’s not going to happen and their are reasons as to why it’s not gonna happen.

That’s my take, you don’t have to agree.

Now here is one of my fav paramore songs that speak on holding someone on a pedestal and you shouldn’t be confused when they let you down.

#peachesparley🍑#sturniolo triplets #chris sturniolo #matt sturniolo #nick sturniolo

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livelaughlovesubs · 10 months ago

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Yessssss yes yes! He looks so proud of himself, how can people not laugh? He makes me laugh and I would just encourage his jokes just so I can see the sparkle in his eyes, he's probably so giddy smdmdndj he's so cute I wanna kiss him senseless

The only way Cyno's a top is a service top, I know just he'd meltttttt into a puddle of love especially when you praise him! Call him a pretty boy, call him the goodest boy in the world!

I just know you could make him cum from praise, he's so used to people looking at him with fear/apprehension, but you're different you've always smile at him and speak to him in such a gentle manner and he's gotta tug his helmet sometimes when you look at him with so much unfiltered adoration in your eyes.

I'm not saying that you've pulled him into a secluded corner to steal a few kisses, he pretends to be annoyed with it yet the way he leans into the kisses says otherwise (he's just lil shy, listen he's never really dated before). I just know that he loves forehead kisses and neck kisses too.

Definitely sensitive, cutie's used to roughness because of his job so gentle touches will drive him wild. Gentle caresses are gonna make him squirm and whine, so so so incredibly sensitive to gentle touches it's so cute watching him writhe.

He might have scratches on his back from a passionate night, honestly he doesn't notice them and had done his usual patrol the next day and was so confused about why everyone seemed off. This man smh 😔he's so dumb and I love it.

The way this man has me in a chokehold is unreal, I cannot wait until his next rerun that twink will be mine 😤

I'm sorry for rambling it's just I don't have anyone to talk about sub Cyno, people are cowards because this man is such a puppy. He's so damn loyal once he locks in a relationship.

-🐇

Okay sorry it took me a while to answer BUT I couldn’t bring it over myself to give an half-asset response to this beautiful beautiful thing.

First I totally agree, I don’t know how anyone could be intimidated by him. He’s literally so ahhhh, the same with xiao. I also headcanon that his abdomen or waist part is the most sensitive, cuz his waist is so cute and adorable and it would be soooo cute if he was really sensitive there. Like just grabbing his hips and caressing them gently gets him all flustered and squirming in your grasp. Some people wonder how you can date him without looking scared, but oh boy. Oh boyyyyy.

He wears so little clothing too! If you don’t like showing off, you have to be careful about where to place the hickeys. Cuz he wouldn’t even notice that they are there, just going on about his day while people are flabbergasted. But if you do like bragging about what’s yours, go for it and mark him up everywhere!! Even if he sees them, he’d love them too much and be too proud to cover them up. So what’s the big deal with everyone? It’s a well known fact you two are going out, why are they so surprised to see some teeth marks on his neck and shoulder?

Cyno is literally such a puppy, he’s suuuch an adorable little dork. It makes one want to see him blush 24/7.

Anyway, I approve of it. Though I don’t have him neither, havent logging in for quite a while. I can’t download the new update cuz I’m installing other gacha games to try them out and my storage has def seen better days 🫠

#nini!rant #🐇 anon #cyno #genshin cyno #cyno x reader #cyno genshin impact #Cyno genshin #cyno fluff #cyno smut #sub Cyno #sub genshin impact #sub genshin

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localcanadiancreature62 · 5 months ago

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My Thoughts on Fiddlestan

Okay you people are literally all or nothing with these mfs,like it's either all gut wretching angst or all tooth rotting fluff. So i raise you,"what if it was both?" aka i made them have a good time but they also have Issues ✨. @misteria247 you might wanna see this one cuz i know you love Fiddlestan lol.

So first things first,their first meeting. They would meet soon after the portal incident when Fidds' sanity is slowly starting to slip from the first several usages of the memory gun and he ends up going to Ford's house after having a vague familiarity with the place as well as a desire to make amends with his friend while he still remembers him,only for him to see Stan at the door. A man wearing his best friend's face. Stan lets the guy in while still keeping the ruse of pretending to be his brother after he just faked his death,trying his hardest to pretend that he knows what Fidds is talking about regarding the portal and Ford's time in college.

A few weeks pass,and Fidds get the slight suspicion that he's not actually talking to Ford as "Ford" brushes off his science-y ramblings with "I don't understand" or "I'm too tired to hear about it maybe later",when he knew that the real Ford would know exactly what he's talking about regarding his ideas for modern computers or Schrodinger's cat as well as gladly ramble along with him even if it's 2am at the time instead of ignoring it. He also realizes that "Ford" surprisingly knows nothing about anomalies and either tries to shoo creatures away or just beats the hell out of them rather than studying them whenever they have an encounter with gnomes or something,plus the fact that he gets jumpy whenever an eye-bat appears. Fidds is still sane enough to notice these "tells" and so he confronts the man about it despite Stan already being nervous about not being able to keep up the act. Stan decides to come clean after the southern man literally backed him into a corner while interrogating him about who he is and where the real Stanford is,he explains the truth about Ford's disappearance and that he's trying to fix the portal while having no idea about how his brother's science mumbo jumbo works. Fidds' expression of anger and fear changes into guilt sympathy and even intrigue as he regrets trying to aggressively gouge the man for answers,when the grifter turned out to care about Ford all along instead of selfishly stealing his life for success. He wondered about Stan's relation to Ford and the man explains that he's Ford's twin brother and that they had a rough patch in their brotherly relationship which lead to this whole mess. Fidds then offers to help fix the portal since he's the one who co built it and Stan couldn't be more than happy,although with the condition of no more lies as that impersonation fiasco genuinely scared him which Stan agrees to. They didn't get along at first with Stan's stubborn personality and tendency to tease others at random while Fidds was just really tired and he wanted to get Ford back so that he can get out of this whole mess,but they managed.

Throughout the building of the portal,the two begin to bond regarding their history with Ford and how the man inadvertently screwed them over with his ego. Then talking about how they always felt inferior in comparison to everyone else (Stan with Ford,Fidds with his rough and tumble ranch family who roughhoused constantly while he was a scrawny nerd),discovering that they weren't so different as they thought. Stan ends up taking his partnership with Fiddleford more seriously as he soon realizes that they only have each other,while Fidds starts to humor Stan's teasing and occasional goofing off since he doesn't have anyone else to turn to with Emma may and Tate still refusing contact from him ever since the divorce (just so that Fidds wouldn't yknow. cheat on his wife). They soon become friends who often look out for each other with Stan trying to stop Fidds from overworking himself while Fidds teaches Stan about quantum physics as he tries really hard to understand despite being the "dumb" twin.

Fidds' use of the memory gun becomes less frequent as he didn't have a reason to blast himself with it anymore due to finally having someone that understands his troubles with Ford and the darn triangle feller,no longer feeling as though he had to forget everything as he had someone to talk to about all of this (i mean in canon he wouldn't never went insane if Ford fucking talked to him and explained why he's still going through with the portal with his desperate desire for approval). Stan sees his steadfast love and support be appreciated by someone besides his ungrateful brother,while Fidds sees his unwavering loyalty and handmade gifts be cherished by someone who cares rather than ignored by his egotistical friend.

The fact that the two found someone who cared even when they have their own troubles means a lot to them,this steadfast love and concern was what made Fidds and Stan slowly fall for each other. Stan finally found someone who appreciates him and sees him as worthy even with his many mistakes or occasional stupidity while Fidds finally found someone who won't waste his loyalty and kindness in favor of their own selfish wishes (*cough* Ford *cough*). They're finally happy,after dealing with so much pain. They had their happy ending,or did they? 😏.

While they WERE in a healthy and loving relationship,things weren't all sunshine and rainbows. Stan outright refuses to talk about his problems in fear of being a burden to his nerd plus the emotional walls he put up were too strong even when he tries to be open toward the southern man which always ends in him not wanting to talk about it,meanwhile Fidds opts to metaphorically run away from his issues by using the memory gun to forget every argument and misunderstanding he had with the drifter (which were mostly caused by the memory gun in the first place). Whenever they have a problem with something that the other does that isn't related to the portal,they don't set boundaries they don't talk about it they don't confront the other about it,they do NOTHING.

Fidds slowly starts to go insane again as he starts forgetting about Stan at times with his use of the memory gun whenever they have an argument which is a LOT of arguments as every couple doesn't always agree with each other,he lashes out and has a paranoia episode over either imagining Stan being a stranger that wants to hurt him or him being Ford that wants to take revenge on him for quitting the project which obviously upsets the drifter but he doesn't do anything about it as he cannot afford to lose the one thing he has left because of his dumb problems (little does he know,is that he's already doing it. he's already losing Fidds cuz of his issues). Stan on the other hand,starts treating Fiddleford with the same codependency that he gave Ford with him expecting the hillbilly to always be there for him and always put HIS interests at heart despite the man having his own wants and needs with his Mcgucket Labs project. Thus Fidds is being taken for granted again while Stan is confused and angry over why this hick is ignoring him and trying to abandon him like Ford did (Stanley your brother issues are showing).

It only gets worse in the moments culminating to Fidds' insanity,where Stan doesn't even know who his hillbilly partner anymore while Fidds is completely unaware of the torment he's putting Stan through with his erratic behavior and amnesiac ramblings. Stan was there for the tapes,he was behind the camera with every transition as the southern man told him it was a little experiment regarding the memory gun and he believed that at first only to soon realize that Fidds was literally frying his own brain with that gun after reading his notes about the electricity that erases the memories plus the side effects of prolonged use. By the time Fidds had that car crash,he quit the project again and stopped seeing Stan as he left the drifter alone to fix the portal by himself albeit with more knowledge of how it works due to the various quantum mechanics lessons the man drilled into him. He just needed to figure out the elaborate codes to actually activate it. Stan missed Fidds as he was guilty about their last interaction being an argument about the memory gun and even encountered him but with a new red robe while the man went on and on about some memory cult,but he knew that the man is too far gone for him to make amends with.

Stan then ended up using Fidds' Mcgucket Labs money to support himself but then he realized that it won't be enough as that business was just a start up gig that didn't had the chance to become successful due to the portal and the memory gun,so he had to come up with another way to survive all alone. Then he went to the Dusk 2 Dawn convenience store and saw that everyone was interested in Ford's weird mad scientist house,taking everyone there as he saw that people's interest in the freaky things in that house would make great revenue for him. The Mystery Shack (originally the Murder Hut) was born,and Stan had finally left his life of being a miserable grifter behind. However.. he still saw his Fiddleford rummage in the trash or make killer robots in the news sometimes. He yearns for what could've been yet he shakes his head as he knew what he had with the nerd was currently unsalvageable in his current insane state.

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o-sachi · 7 months ago

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Dance With Me? - Oneshot (Request)

ᯓ ume tasks sugishita to accompany his little sister to her dance except... they kinda hate each other.... ᯓ character; sugishita kyotaro (wind breaker) ᯓ tags; reader is ume's biological little sis, tsundere sugi, enemies to lovers-ish fluff, sfw, afab reader, no y/n

@pixelcafe-network

It's not news to anyone that Sugishita would do absolutely anything that Ume would ask of him—tending the garden, patrolling the town, hanging out at the cafe. Done, done, and done.

But there was one thing that he—with utmost reluctance—would not do gladly even if the revered Umemiya Hajime told him to.

And that was to interact with Ume's little sister.

You'd think that siblings would at least be similar to each other, but you were nothing like your brother. While the two of you were both outgoing and friendly, Ume was a bit more gentle and easygoing while you were... a bit of a firecracker to say the least.

Ume stood in front of Sugishita. He clasped his hands tightly as he pleaded with the younger man. They were in the middle of gardening so peacefully when he decided to ruin it for them.

"Pretty please? If you can't do it for her then do it for me."

Damn it. Sugishita huffed out. When he put it like that—there was no way he could disappoint his favorite upperclassman. But maybe... if he started suggesting other people, then that should be sort of like helping too... right?

Ume sighed, exhausted from begging. Not to mention, you were already on his ass about this whole situation. The thing is—there was a school dance that everyone at your school was looking forward to. But you had to bring a plus one. Otherwise, people would judge you for not having one. High school works in ridiculous ways.

Initially, Ume already offered to go. But who the hell goes to a high school dance with their brother?

"I can't ask Sakura because he'd explode before he even gets to the dance. She thinks of Nirei as a brother too and Suo intimidates her too much."

"Kaji-san?" Sugishita adds.

"No dice," Ume sighs again, placing his hands on his hips. "She wants to go with someone in the same year as her.

And asking her enemy would be any better? Sugishita felt his heart being gripped and not in a good way. Ume's puppy eyes really had no effect, though Sugishita was starting to feel bad. Maybe one night with you wouldn't be so abysmal.

"...Fine."

"Hooray!" Ume almost jumped up for joy as he finally had some good news to bring home to you...

Or not—because you may have thwacked him over the head with a book after he told you that the one and only Sugishita Kyotaro would be accompanying to the most important event of your high school life.

But there was nothing else to do as both of you stood outside of your school. Ume had just dropped you off after what was the most awkward car ride ever. Your brother talked the whole time—hyping up the both of you while neither of you even talked.

"So..."

"So what?"

Sugishita clicked his tongue. You haven't even exchanged more than 5 words tonight and you were already showing attitude. "Aren't we gonna go inside?"

"I dunno, do YOU even wanna go inside? 'Cuz I don't."

"But Umemiya-san told me this was important to you."

Your crossed your arms and looked off to the side, embarrassed to be put into this situation. "Well, it is... but now I don't care anymore."

What a brat, he thought. But as annoying as you were right now—Sugishita had promised Ume that he'd make sure you would have fun. The longer the arrangement simmered in his mind, the stronger his resolve became to stay true to that promise.

Never mind that you two were oil and water. If he had something to prove to Ume, then maybe the same could be said for you. Sugishita wanted to shut you up after all.

"C'mon," he insists, grabbing your hand and dragging you into the building.

"Hey—what the f—wait!" Though your tried to resist, his grip was too strong. He was hellbent on getting you inside and showing you that your brattiness was making you miss out.

Your resistance was futile as you found yourself in the event hall where the reception was asking for your ticket. You begrudgingly held it in your fist before Sugishita swiped it.

"Here. Two tickets."

The attendant examined the small pieces of paper. Then, the two of you were finally at the dance. The lights were dimmed and upbeat music played while people danced. A sigh of relief escapes you, thankful that it wasn't a slow dance yet.

As the newcomers, eyes were on you. Of course, people were curious who this tall and scary guy was and how he knew you. The guys were sizing him up while the other girls were whispering among themselves.

You noticed this all, but your "date" was seemingly oblivious to it all.

"Aren't you gonna go and dance with your friends?"

"What about you?"

"What about me? When did YOU care about ME?" he asked, emphasizing the two words that never got along well.

Crossing your arms, you looked around the place. You looked forward to this event for weeks—maybe even months. But here you were, sulking. But why? You came in a nice dress with a date who doesn't look too shabby. Did you really hate him in the first place or...

"My friends are just gonna ask me about you and I don't want to explain all of that."

Sugishita scoffs. "Just tell them we're friends. No need to go on a whole rant about how you hate me."

That catches your attention and you crane your head to look up at him. "Okay, first of all, you're the one who hates me. Not the other way around."

"And when did I say that?"

"Well, you—" pause. "I just—" another pause. "You just seem to dislike my presence. I can tell. I'm not stupid."

He grumbles, letting his arms fall to the side. It completely slipped your mind how much he was talking today.

"You're annoying and you bother me a lot but I don't hate you," he admits. And somehow that sincere concession has your heart beating a little faster than normal.

"Well whatever. I don't ca—"

"Do you hate me?"

The question catches you off-guard. That's the million dollar question. "No... I guess not. You're just not the most receptive to my actions so I think you're weird. Like something's wrong with you."

"Maybe if you respected my boundaries and didn't annoy me all the time. Maybe I'd like you."

The air stills. Momentum kept building up and that's what he blamed for the last few words he spoke. Then again, "liking" someone doesn't have to be taken in a romantic context. It would be your fault if you misunderstood.

With all your bickering, you were late to notice that the song had slowed. People had calmed down and gone in pairs. Hands were attached to waists and eyes were peering into each other. It was starting.

Sugishita took a few steps forward before turning to look back at you. He held his hand out. "Dance with me?"

You stared at him, dumbfounded. Was this guy so devoted to your brother that he'd throw all his dignity away as soon as he asks him to dance with his little sister? It was both impressive and ridiculous at the same time.

"What about your boundaries?"

He shook his head, shoving his hand in his pocket instead. "Fine, be the loser that stays in the sidelines."

This was nothing like the Sugishita that you know. He wasn't acting right that it was almost concerning. But... maybe you were both crazy because as soon as he turned his back to you—you were chasing after him.

Linking your arm with his, you tugged at him a bit. "You're the loser. Not me."

A sly smirk crosses his face. "Let's see if you manage not to step on my foot then, Loser."

#wind breaker #wind breaker x reader #sugishita x reader #sugishita kyotaro #kyotaro sugishita #pixelcafenetwork #—☕️sachi #—☕️wind breaker #—☕️sugishita kyotaro #—☕️milktea

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sukifoof · 2 years ago

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okay i have been thinking about this for a while i am finally going to talk about it. every single time i play undertale i see this and go "oh flowey everything is wrong with u <3" cuz this is yet another case of his projection. he LOVES to project and i think a lot about how he so firmly believes everything is his fault-- whether that's chara's death or his parents grieving or literally anything else. and i think a lot of it is part of how much he cares about everyone... he's convinced that if only he had done everything right then everything would be fine.

he believes either the fault lies in him doing something wrong, or life is just "unfair". he even says in this exact scene that if only "you" had gone through without caring about anyone, you wouldn't have to feel this way now. if only he hadn't made chara care about him, if only he hadn't cared about chara. if only his parents didn't love him so much, they wouldn't have to feel this way now. so he subconsciously tries to get around this by convincing himself he doesn't care and can't care about anyone, despite that clearly not being true, given the alarm clock dialogue.

and in a similar way, as toriel is always a parallel for flowey, toriel attempts to do this by telling frisk not to come back. flowey and toriel don't really... deal with their emotions, they just shove them down and avoid it as best as they can. it's really interesting to see flowey's thoughts on toriel too; flowey doesn't understand why she keeps caring for humans when she keeps losing them. if she just didn't care then she wouldn't be feeling the way she does, right? toriel and flowey both innately want to take care of those around them and feel this great responsibility when things go wrong.

so he tells us it's all our fault for loving our friends. "being nice just makes you get hurt," as he says in the neutral end. so much of his mindset is rooted in how much he cares about his family, to the point where he seems to feel if only he didn't care it wouldn't hurt as much. something something opposite of it's better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all. learning to love again and accept loss is such an important part of his character because of how his bereaved mindset left him feeling numb and resentful. the fact that he's able to say he's friends with frisk and that he's still tries to take care of toriel says sooo much about how much he's grown and it makes me wanna cry i love flowey so much he is the best character in anything <3

#undertale #utdr #flowey #asriel #asriel dreemurr #toriel #toriel dreemurr #utdr analysis

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cat-loves-music · 1 year ago

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My Mattheo Riddle Headcannons

Okay so I've had these circling my brain for a while. Hope you enjoy, but plz don't come for me if you don't think these are correct. These are just what I think.

Okay for starters, he's definitely Sleep Token coded. You can fight me on this. This is the hill I die on.

Like specifically Blood Sport and Ascensionism. You cannot tell me otherwise.

No matter how the story starts, I feel like he'll maybe pine from afar just to keep you safe. At least during the beginning of your relationship.

I feel like during 5th year, he'll definitely be obsessed at that point and will do anything to keep you safe (specifically from Umbitch)

So I think he'll definitely like join her squad and just be a lot more lenient with you.

He also did it probably because all his friends did — Theo and Enzo probably did it for shits and giggles.

I also feel like he'd be fluent in pet names once your relationship gets going. Specifically Italian and Spanish. Maybe even a little French.

^^I couldn't help to put that one in there cuz I'm a sucker for Italian and Spanish pet names.

He's definitely a tease when he finally doesn't care about staying away anymore.

Like he'll be so frustrating but charming at the same time and you'd hate it.

But don't mind or you get used to it eventually.

I believe it's well known he gets into fights and he most definitely will. Mainly if he hears someone talk bad about you or are just being creeps.

Speaking of that too, HE'S JEALOUSSSS!!! Like so much so if he sees you being all flirty with someone he will immediately intimidate them and tell them to back off.

Circling back to the goon squad thing, he would so use his power to intimidate people too. Why have power if you're not gonna use it?

He would definitely have his friends begging him to actually do something about his feelings for you.

"You're gonna have to talk to her eventually."

And he'll always make up some sort of excuse.

"I can't, I'm too busy for relationships."

Cuz he hates the way he wants to be selfish but can't because he doesn't wanna put you in danger.

Otherwise...he would definitely be selfish.

Sorry if this is bad. I was kinda all over the place. Hope you enjoyed and if you want more Headcannons for Mattheo or anyone else I write for plz let me know!

#writing inspiration #harry potter #mattheo riddle #theo nott #draco malfoy #mattheo riddle headcanon #mattheo riddle x reader #mattheo riddle imagines #mattheo x you #mattheoxreader #mattheo x y/n

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nikist-4-n · 3 months ago

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I just have a few things I want to say in which you don’t have to agree, but the first being what did you guys get out of exposing Dodo? Why do people feel the need to expose others? Just makes room for others to bring that person down and hurt them, but because something is done to you doesn’t mean you do it back to others. Where it is wrong, all the stuff Dodo did, and no one will really know why she did it, but to say Chei did nothing isn’t possible. People don’t do things to hurt others without reason unless something was done to them. Sometimes we don’t realize we upset people, but that’s where Dodo should’ve communicated. 2: About all the hate that’s been received on here, it can easily be ignored. No one can control you; no one can do anything that would take away value from your life, so why do everyone not just ignore anons? There’s no need to announce a hiatus or threaten to go on one; just do it if you really want to. It’s only an act of looking for sympathy so that people will tell you to stay. And lastly, people love to use the term sexualizing easily when it comes to idols but never western artists. People are sexual; it’s normal to feel sexual feelings towards others. You don’t think idols fuck? You don’t think idols think about fans and other people that way too? What makes it wrong that we do it but okay they do? It’s funny no one gets mad when people talk about western artists that way. The fact of the matter is we’re human; now, to sexualize someone is to purely see them in a sexual way. But if you care about them and also feel that way, it’s normal news flash we’re created to procreate. People always make it seem like such a crime to express how you feel, which is why every interaction is on the surface because everyone’s too sensitive to go deeper. Overall you don’t expose others; you guard them. No matter what they’ve said or done, you protect one’s secrets because that goes to show your true character. Judge Dodo all you want and be mad at her for the things she’s done, but can you all honestly look at yourselves and say you’re perfect? You’re no better than her. You think because you don’t do as she does or say what she says, it makes you a saint? You’re not.

( didn't wanna respond cuz it's a lot )

Well this is a lot but I have disagreements

1 what did you guys get out of exposing Dodo? Why do people feel the need to expose others? Just makes room for others to bring that person down and hurt them, but because something is done to you doesn’t mean you do it back to others

I don't like the way u put it as if she wasn't bullying a friend of ours so of course we exposed her ( and we also did it so people know how she is and so she doesn't hurt others ) and people feel the need to expose others because of the reasons I explained above. It's about ur morals aswell because why must anyone be silent when someone is an objectively bad person? Ur disgusting if u think like that actually. And our objective was to not send hate to dodo, but to tell others what she did and because she lied as well. And to ur last part, what happened to dodo never happened to me so I wasn't spreading hate or anything I simply told everyone what a bad person she is.

2 Where it is wrong, all the stuff Dodo did, and no one will really know why she did it, but to say Chei did nothing isn’t possible. People don’t do things to hurt others without reason unless something was done to them. Sometimes we don’t realize we upset people, but that’s where Dodo should’ve communicated

Actually I disagree because dodo did not have a reason to be mad ( read here through pic 1-4 ) and chei did nothing because they were joking together and that was definitely not the reason dodo was mad cuz dodo joked the worst out of all of us. If dodo had a reason she should've told me instead of escalating the situation. And I agree with the last part ( first time we agree ), if she did have a reason she should've told us instead of taking whatever she felt out on chei.

3 About all the hate that’s been received on here, it can easily be ignored. No one can control you; no one can do anything that would take away value from your life, so why do everyone not just ignore anons? There’s no need to announce a hiatus or threaten to go on one; just do it if you really want to. It’s only an act of looking for sympathy so that people will tell you to stay

Firstly what the fuck. What ur saying is easier said than done cuz we all are different in the way we handle things, if u can ignore the hate doesn't mean someone else can too. Just because it didn't/did happened to u and u ignored it doesn't mean it can be the same for others. Like May, the anon was literally threatening to come to her house and saying all sorts of nasty things which is pretty hard to ignore ( even for me ) so are u invalidating her feelings? And what if the anon came to her house and hurt her? Then are u gonna tell her she should've ignored it? Ur actually disgusting. This was a very ignorant take

4 And lastly, people love to use the term sexualizing easily when it comes to idols but never western artists

I disagree because people sexualize these idols on both sides. And also unlike kpop, ( some ) pop idols use s*x appeal to sell themselves ( which does not justify anything I'm just pointing out the obvious) but kpop capitalises mostly on parasocial relationships ( like variety shows, lives, fan calls, fan meets, etc) which you rarely see pop idols doing and also cause of the fact that kpop is full of minors in groups as well. And to the adult kpop idols, it still doesn't justify u sexualizing them because sexualizing people is a form of dehumanizing people and only seeing them as s*x objects rather than people which is disgusting actually.

5 People are sexual; it’s normal to feel sexual feelings towards others. You don’t think idols fuck? You don’t think idols think about fans and other people that way too? What makes it wrong that we do it but okay they do? It’s funny no one gets mad when people talk about western artists that way

Just because people are sexual anon, doesn't mean they must act out their sexual feelings ( like calling them daddy, filming under skirt videos, etc. ) kpop idols are humans and they deserve to be respected. And why would I think that idols are fucking or them thinking about people that way, it's none of my business and it's straight up gross to even think about. S*x is a normal thing to feel and talk about, but imagining people u don't know feeling like that is weird af to me. And people don't get mad at pop idols because ( some ) pop idols talk about it in their lyrics and use it as their whole brand sometimes ( eg. Megan Thee Stallion, cardi B, Playboi Carti, Niki Minaj, Ice Spice, Glorrila, Sabrina Carpenter, etc. ) so it is weird to compare them to kpop ( idols ) which goes for a kind of opposite brand.

6 The fact of the matter is we’re human; now, to sexualize someone is to purely see them in a sexual way. But if you care about them and also feel that way, it’s normal news flash we’re created to procreate

I disagree because a lot of things can exist at the same time. U can sexualize an idol while also caring about them. It doesn't make it less bad tho cuz u still sexualizing them no matter how u put it. And that's not how sexualizing works, u don't need to be able to procreate to sexualize an idol (eg. u can be a man sexualizing a man or a woman sexualizing a woman too and etc. ) so that take is very close minded, it's 2024 wake up. Just cuz we can procreate doesn't mean we should or have to because u don't need to be able to procreate with someone to love or sexualize them

7 People always make it seem like such a crime to express how you feel, which is why every interaction is on the surface because everyone’s too sensitive to go deeper

Anon u can express ur love to an idol without sexualizing them at all, u can talk about their talent, their personality, their music or new haircut. And we're not sensitive for calling out behaviour like this for example:

( u can see it's dodo in the URL )

In conclusion

Although u made some points ( barely ), ur statements were still heavily flawed. I suggest u do some character improvement with some of these takes because they were either ignorant or close minded

#marie yapping #this was ALOT #glad im done

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