#with people from a cult?
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it’s bloodwork day so I cannot eat until my appointment later into the morning (close to lunch, so I can eat smth afterwards), but boi if it isn’t stressful looking at crackers ang go 👀. and they aren’t even good crackers to begin with! time to write the hunger away.
#sneaky niki#lamb loose liveblogging#silky niki#I have that dog in me (*points to a shaky italian greyhound with anxiety*)#also why is it that today the theme of the day is HDS having a little found family trope going on in this fic?#with people from a cult?#mate. mate open your eyes. you can’t save everyone ;-; also you are too rotten inside to save them#or are u? maybe you can save a couple of them. as a treat.#maybe the young woman that reminds you so much of your niece can be taken away#or the young lawyer that reminds you so much of yourself back in the days#or the actress who scammed you but now makes sure you have every technological advantages you could possibly need#KOJ hates u. sure. but SDY his still his top priority. maybe you can save them both who knows#these are the vibes for this writing session#people may not be losing money on the ground these days but I still hope anyone reading can find some money bills on the floor#u deserve a littol treat 🍀#Niki out~!
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i've died on smaller hills, so i can't judge. but i do think it's funny whenever posts about the proper definition of a poor little meow meow circulate, considering none of them mention that the origin was a kpop fan's absolutely bonkers tweet about not being able to protect a full grown man who was getting backlash for including audio from the jonestown cult leader jim jones in one of his songs
#cults mention#i don't actually expect people to know this the internet is very large and it's hard to trace the origins of things#but this is always a wild one to look at from the outside
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The cult of...Danny Fenton?
So! Way back when Danny first moved into his new neighborhood in Gotham, he had some trouble controlling his Powers. The different Types and Levels of Ectoplasm in the air when compared to Amity had thrown off his control.
He was used to being in places where his Ectoplasm meshed well with the Atmosphere, like a Water Balloon in a Pool, but in Gotham that analogy would be closer to a Water Balloon in the sewers. It was too different from what he was used to to fully control his Powers.
So it's understandable that he messed up a few times and his neighbors found out about his Abilities.
They took it well at first, Danny wasn't going to go Rogues or anything, and he never used them maliciously, but eventually they got curious.
They asked what his limits were, how he got them in the first place, and what the hell the Ghost Zone was. The answers "None Really", "I died and was reborn", and "A Collective of every Afterlife at once" did spark some interesting reactions from them.
Most importantly, a few of them joked about him being an Eldritch God that they needed to worship. He was good enough friends with them that at that point they felt comfortable pranking eachother, so they did just that.
Danny woke up one day on his birthday, and saw all of his friends and neighbors surrounding the makeshift Throne they had made and put him on while he was asleep. The entire day they chanted stuff like "The Great One requires Ms. Smiths Apple Pie for his day of birth!" And "The Great One Wishes for us to sing the Ritual Song! Happy Birthday to You! Happy Birth-"
After his birthday, they kept up the joke.
It didn't help that his powers had evolved Again! And now he could bestow abilities onto his friends. The jokes they made about their God granting them Supernatural Powers to rule the world with were insufferable.
Then, one day while he was just resting at home, watching a movie on his TV, he felt a Pull at his Core. The same kind of Pull whenever he was being summoned. But why would they summon hi- Oh Shit! It's Mr Jenkins Party today! He was supposed to meet them at the Warehouse they used for special events an Hour Ago!
He quickly accepted the Summoning, but was met with a suprising sight. His Neighbors all tied up in a pile to his right, a spilled table of party food to his left, and right in front of him, Batman and his Family watching him with wary eyes.
Slowly, he opened his mouth. "...so, did you come for the party or..."
#Dpxdc#Dp x dc#Dcxdp#Dc x dp#Danny Phantom#Dc#Dcu#Danny is Worshipped by a Cult#It started out as a Joke from his friends#Then he started giving them powers and they decided to take it to the next level#They told their work friends that they were in a cult now#They showed off the minor powers Danny gave them#And slowly they inducted more people into the Danny Fenton Cult (most of them knew it was a joke on a friend)(some were serious)#They were planning on using the Party to introduce Danny to all his new “Followers” and get a laugh out of it#Unfortunately the Bats hears about a new Cult forming and went to go stop it#The Cult succeeded in Summoning their God#And he's just a Guy.#Not Phantom. He's in his Human Form and looked like the most average guys you've ever seen.#The Bats eventually leave with an order to them to never Form a Cult again#The Cult feels that Batman is oppressing their right to Free Religion and begin to make the Cult even BIGGER out of Spite#Danny might need to step in soon...#...but Batman did beat up his friends...and he did technically try to revoke their right to free assembly and religion...#...Maybe he should just let this play out...
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[First] [Previous] [Next] Fight part 1/? I wanted to do the fight in one sitting initially. But it got pretty long pretty fast- so it's gonna be cut in two or three, depending on how much time I do the drawing- Funfact of this update: On my second party of COTL, I two or three tap Baal. Aym was more of a problem, but the two cats where quickly put in baby jail.
#cabi leodrann#digital art#comic#cult of the lamb#aym and baal#cotl aym#cotl baal#cotl lamb#cotl narinder#through hell and back cotl au#tw blood#tw gore#I had to stop myself from changing things again in the drawings#because at this rate I would have never publish it because it was not perfect#Don't forget people dont put pressure on yourself when you do something for fun
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you know i used to think it was weird how sora and roxas have such different personalities for supposedly being 'the same person' but after playing a few games i sort of realized that they do have similar personalities, because roxas acts how sora does when he's under extreme stress.
compare roxas to sora in, say, kh1. that's where a lot of peoples idea of sora's personality comes from. sora is generally very upbeat and optimistic in that game. not very similar to roxas, right?
but let's switch the game and talk about a game where sora is ABSOLUTELY GOING THROUGH IT. chain of memories.
sora's resting state is melancholy in com. he only ever cheers up in short bursts, usually when he's joking around with friends. just like roxas.
he's quick to anger, and tends to lash out at the organization members. best example of this is when larxene makes him 'remember' namine, and he swings at her repeatedly, even after she's gone. he only stops when jiminy is able to snap him out of it.
you know what scene that resembles?
sora, while a bit more on the angry side and less sad, continues to act like this in kh2 when he's in stressful situations. (he also has a tendancy to insult people which, while it's not very related to the point, is very funny and sora saying 'gonna cry?' to xigbar is great.) i cant comment any further than that about kh2 off the top of my head.
so, roxas acts like sora does when he's stressed, right? but why is roxas always acting like that? to which i say, he isnt!
he only ever acts like that when he's also in fucked up and stressful situations, which happens to be a CONSTANT in his life. but when he's hanging out with axel and xion, a decidedly NOT stressful situation, he's a lot more like sora. he's teasing his friends and insulting his coworkers and joking around and acting like a normal kid. not really important, but unless i misremembered some sora lines which is VERY possible, both roxas and sora respond to friendly insults with "oh thanks!" a lot. just a funny little detail that felt relevant.
the biggest differences between roxas and sora boil down to environment and... i dont know how to put it besides volume? roxas is very quiet and tends to keep most of his thoughts to himself, while sora is very loud and expressive in comparison.
there is one other huge difference i noticed, which is less character based and more story. sora wanted to get off destiny islands and explore with his friends, but roxas just wanted routine. sora wants adventure, and roxas wants things to stay the same, for days where he gets off work and eats ice cream with his friends to last forever, to keep having conversations about nothing and watching the sunset. roxas wants normalcy, sora wants excitement. it's just interesting seeing their contrast.
not sure if this is very well said or anything i just wanted to talk about my boys
#random thoughts#its been a while since i got to use that tag eheheh#i bet theres a few people following me who didnt even know i did analysis posts#the fact that sora and roxas grew up in very different environments is pretty important btw#roxas was already a bit quiet and being in a cult where any expression of emotion is immediately shut down probably didnt help#we'll probably never get a good idea of how roxas would be if he was in a normal situation#id say some of the twilight town stuff might be a close estimate but even that doesnt really fit considering all the shit going down#even from the very start hes being accused of theft hes Not doing the best#anyways. sora and roxas are different obviously#but theyre a lot more similar than people really talk about#kingdom hearts#roxas#sora#not rereading this so it might be a little weird and hard to read sorry
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you have to love people for real. and that means loving them as people who have flaws, and will annoy you or get on your nerves some times. treating them like a toy or product you can throw away when you get bored or upset is not acceptable. it's what we've been conditioned to do, but it makes the world worse.
#.txt#i didnt always know this and i dont pretend i did.#i'm just glad i've learned it now at least#i went straight from a cult-like group into tumblrs 'its ok to kick any one out of your life for any reason' environment in my early 20s#it made my life turbulent lonely and miserable#thinking on the older adults who should have known better leading sheltered young queer people astray back then makes me feel so bitter.
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the only reason Tim Drake and Damian Wayne don't get along is because if they did the writers wouldn't be able to come up with a plot contrived enough for them to struggle with.
they would be the ultimate team if they could just work smoothly together.
but they cant so balance is restored to the world i guess.
#batfam#batfamily#batman#dc robin#tim drake#damian wayne#tim drake wayne#they would be unstoppable#they would be feared#they would enable each other#the only thing stopping them from taking over the world is the fact that Tim is too lazy to run everything and B would be dissapointed#tim drake is so underrated and deserves to be a menace#damian wayne has so much potential and people write himi off as 'angsty' and a 'brat' so easily#okay he is a bit of a brat but like he is 10#have you ever met a 10 year old?#let alone one brought up in a assassin ninja cult where you kill or be killed#he is growing and getting better leave him alone#its called character development#this is just a bit of fun lmao#tim drake is my favourite damaged genius - sherlock sit down you superpowered mf
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(ignore if ur ask box isn't open for trick or treaters lol-)
a Moondrop treat for you!
….but you must brave spider moon…
very much inspired by @xitsensunmoon ’s spider moon
#fnaf#fnaf fanart#dca fanart#fnaf moon#fnaf dca#spider moon#art#fanart#trick or treat#halloween#moondrop#spiders#i can’t believe i rly @ed xitsen#i rly said notice me senpai#cringe amirite#ask#also was testing out a new brushset curious if people can tell#from this rly baller artist#cult of the lamb#?#lol#bugs
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Gabriel’s flock is the closest you’re gonna get to a cult that actually isn’t a cult due to their mostly pacifistic ways
This does cause problems however when dissenters or spies start causing problems
Gabriel is a little backwards with how they deal with people like this, as they simply just kick them out instead of forcing them to to change their ways
Granted if they cause actual problems, like stealing, damage to property, or hurting others: they will get sent to jail
For the most part it’s these individuals choice if they want to stay, Gabriel isn’t forcing them
Doesn’t mean Gabriel can’t get frustrated tho and contemplate “what if I just said fuck it and murdered these people”
#coolcatbeans#possly art#cult of the lamb#cotl#cotl lamb#cotl narinder#not Narilamb yet#Pushing Daisies au#game: hey you run a CULT and do CULT STUFF#me: okay but what if- no cult?#“ Marz how does Gabriel gain faith?#from the people who do want to stay and receive protection from the last god in the land of course#word about Gabriels flock and their practices would def spread#I dunno man I just think Gabriel feels more kinship to mortals than gods#they’re tired of cults and death and suffering#they just want peace
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Prompt 263
Once More, we return to Tiamat prompts.
It was a wonderful idea, really! If one of them couldn’t break the barrier, then surely their combined might would do it! And it had! It had worked, even if their remaining humanity was sacrificed. They’d done it, they’d made it where everyone could escape, could leave!
… Except for them. Someone had to close the portal. And it all would have been fine, if not for the remnants of the GIW. One last hail mary from the imbeciles, they all supposed. Trapping them here within the Zone.
Separated from their families, from the pair of children they had agreed to raise. At least their siblings would watch over Ellie and Jordan. Kyle could hide them, make sure they were safe. Jazz… Jazz was gone, the final straw in this plan.
They screamed, they raged, they destroyed in grief for those that didn’t make it, and for those who had but had nowhere to go. No portals opened, even as they tore at the green around them. They fought, any that thought they were weak, that they were merely a beast, an abomination trapped in chains of science and gold.
There was nothing that could be done, Frostbite had said, sympathy in his voice. No way to turn back the clock with how entwined they had become, Clockwork had explained. The only thing they could do was wait, Pandora had tried to sooth, despite it doing nothing.
They wrenched open the coffin in a hazy fury, tearing apart armies like it was blades of grass. Their maws devoured dead who had lost themselves and become mere husks and thralls, lashing tails ripping through armour like it was nothing.
And then as titans, they clashed with the one who had once stolen the city here. There was no desperation from them this time, no armor besides scales unbreakable as flames and storms and ice and thorns ripped islands apart. There was no desperation besides that of their opponent’s.
There was a pleasure in their victory, before it was wrenched away. What use was a crown when their family wasn’t there? When their daughter, their son, their children were not there by their side?
Paulina laughed, hysterical as ectoplasm dripped from her maw as Kwan howled. Their body was covered in it, their rampage that had no use, no reason leaving a trail of destruction behind them. Is this what they wanted?
No.
Danny raised his head from the dissolving corpses to look towards the obliterated roof of the Keep, once so terrifying now turning to dust like the crown. The crown reforming above their heads, heavy and almost choking.
They would carry this weight together. Would restructure things, would do what they had wanted to do for Amity before the Barriers. They’d work together to rebuild the Realms, make it safer, make it safe for those newly dead.
No matter how long it took, no matter how hard it would be to fix the destruction they had wrought in this meaningless battle. (“Danny, you’re the spokesperson,” Sam spoke up, thorn-like scales ruffling. “You’re most familiar with the realms thanks to the Infinimap.” Fair. “We’ll need allies, we’re only nine people.”)
(“Let me talk to the egyptian afterlife,” Tucker sounded exhausted, hood folding back. “I’m most familiar with them… Star, Paulina, you’re both Princess Dora’s favorites-”)
(“We can do it. Just give us time.” “Maybe a to-do list.” “Clockwork. We need to talk to Clockwork, he’d be most familiar with this.” “Rest first, nerds. We’re all… exhausted.”)
(Valerie laughed tiredly, blades melting to heal a broken horn. “Time isn’t linear here Dash. You know that. I know that. For once we’re the ones with time to spare.” It would take years to get things up to snuff. Make things Safe for when they could bring their families here.)
Their eyes opened as the now flimsy chains shattered, a smile stretching across the shared face of their humanoid form. Soon. They could return to the mortal realm soon. Just a little more, and they could see their little ones. They'd waited a thousand years, they could wait a few days more.
(also have sketch)
@fairy-lights-and-blobs @radiance1 You both seem to enjoy my Tiamat prompts/Aus lol
#DCxDP#DPxDC#Prompts#dp x marvel#The Class Pulls a Tiamat#Ghost King Danny#But Not Really it’s All of Them#Reminder for who is part of the Ennead: Danny/Dash/Sam/Tucker/Val/Paulina/Kwan/Star/Wes#They adopted Dani & Dan#Why yes there is a couple of “cults” from people from Amity#Liminality causes increased lifespans but those who were merely contaminated are long dead#This is also a bit of another Au#Ghost Kings have subconscious influence on the Realms (hence why all the ghosts were so fighty) which means~#Ghosts are Dragons#At least now they are#People outside the Realms aren’t aware that Pariah is no longer king thx to the large amount of destruction#Some poor hero or vigilante is going to try and stop this Portal thing#And end up in the throne room to their instant regret#The Ennead’s shortest form is still like 15ft (4.6m) & in dragon form is far above 200ft#Kyle is able to hide the truth while the truth can’t be hidden from Wes#Why yes the Ennead have been removed from their humanity a bit over time#it's been a while for them
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havent decided how i want the introduction to go yet but i imagine it would roughly be one of these two
#null havoc damage#cult of the lamb#i just havent decided what baal and ayms relation to narinder is. i like both main ideas for them#like its very fun and sweet to imagine that he sees them as his sons. but it makes more sense to me that he was more distant#i just dont see narinder as a father. i think he would take care of them but i dont think he would be affectionate at all#like genuinely. 'guardian' is the best term you could give him. they are his apprentices#he taught them magic and combat and they probably guided souls in his stead. but they arent family. to me#i think its possible in this au that once they all got free THEN they started bonding more#like baal and aym would have spent a long time with their mother but given their immortality from having some of the crowns powers#they would eventually return out of a sense of duty that they were raised with. which would lead to more genuine interaction#i think narinder could have a habit of taking in strays but i dont think he would be their dad. just someone to feed and protect them#until theyre old enough to leave. yknow#but i LIKE the idea of him being nice. because i am a sap. i think its sweet when people draw them getting along
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at this point I think the protocol characters have basically settled into a few identifiable looks in most fan art, there's still variation but not so massively that I can't immediately tell who's who in any given image. except for celia. I look at cast line ups and see alice, sam, gwen, colin, lena, and the most random woman I have ever seen in my life.
#my guess would be that a lot of people had established mental images for her from mag 100/the cult episodes#but she was never a popular enough art subject to get the homogenization treatment?#tmagp#marina marvels at life
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miscellaneous danyal al ghul things
specifically about the danyal al ghul from my post/prompt here and i wanna get my misc. headcanons/thoughts on him (especially in his early stay with the fentons) out here before i make any other danyal al ghul aus
list under the cut because whoops this got longer than i expected. which really i should have expected
the Fentons are unaffiliated with the League, which was perfect for Danny faking his death.
he struggles with empathy. Empathy was not taught nor encouraged while he was with the League, so it's a skill that's been pretty stunted. At 15 he's better at empathizing with people, but he still struggles with it. He's pretty bad at reassuring/comforting people and usually acts as an emotional rubber duck for Sam and Tucker to vent to if need be. He sometimes offers blunt and sometimes mean opinions, especially if its about another person.
Sam and Tucker do not know he's an ex-assassin, they are however, pretty positive that he used to be part of an eco-fascist cult with a focus on martial arts?? They've been helping him tone down some of his more,,, extreme views on humanity ever since they caught wind of his more extreme ideologies.
He and Sam are still avid environmentalists and feed into each other quite a bit. They spend plenty of time at protests and pestering the school into more eco-friendly options.
Dash is not dead on the sole fact that Danny knew he had to lay low in Amity Park and killing someone was not, in fact, 'laying low'.
he did, however, traumatize him when Dash first tried to bully him. Safe to say, Danny is not bullied at school and neither are Sam and Tucker.
Danny didn't make any friends in his first year at Amity Park. He was surly, grumpy, standoffish, more stubborn than Sam, and pretty self-important about himself. Jazz was trying to teach him against these things, but she is a 12 year old unaffiliated with the League. Danny did not respect her nor listen to a word she said. It wasn't until like, year two that he finally started paying to mind what she was saying and slowly started to improve on himself
Sam approached him first, he rebuffed her quite harshly, and then Danny approached her sometime afterward when he overheard her talking about environmental rights. Sam completely ignored him though when he agreed with her, and Danny had to later learn that he needed to apologize for being rude to her when they first met. He did so eventually, and they started to talk more with Tucker and Sam.
Danny's a bit more reserved than he is in canon, although he steadily learns how to act as a regular teenager when he's out in public. He's a bit more friendlier at least, although when he's around Sam and Tucker he drops the act. He still has a somewhat formal way of talking, it's just become more casual after a lot of ribbing from Sam and Tucker. When he's angry or annoyed he starts talking poshly though.
His humor is relatively the same as in canon, if somehow dryer and more insulting at some points
Those rare moments where he gets really pissed usually ends up with him insulting someone in arabic or any of the other languages he picked up from the league. He is the go-to for Tucker's Spanish homework. (Tucker makes that mistake and learns that Danny is a very strict teacher)
while Danny doesn't view the Fentons as his parents, even five years after living with them, he does respect them to some amount. He respects them enough at least that when Vlad Masters comes sniffing around, he is suitably offended on both Maddie and Jack's behalf. And when he finds out Vlad was the one who tried to kill Jack and tried to tell him to renounce him as his father/parental guardian, danny threw a suitably sharp object at him and insulted him quite horrendously
Vlad still wants him as his kid. In fact perhaps even moreso after this.
Danny trains with Maddie to keep up with his training. It's not quite the same but it prevents him from getting completely rusty
Sam and Tucker know that Danny has a little brother, but nothing else beyond that other than Danny cares about him quite a lot and that he got his facial scar from keeping him safe.
Danny cares about Sam, Tucker, and Jazz quite a bit, but he struggles to convey it. Especially early on when he realized he cared about them and like instinct started being harsher to them and more critical of their actions. This resulted in quite a few arguments with Sam and Tucker and Jazz until he got sat down and told outright that the way he was treating them wasn't okay. It's a process he's still trying to unlearn even at 15. He has become kinder towards them as a result, and has begun looking for what they did right rather than what they did wrong.
He harbors a lot of guilt over how he treated Damian in the League, and its a pretty big conflict he has with himself since he's torn between telling himself it was for the best to make sure Damian survived the League, and feeling like crap over how harsh/critical of Damian he was and realizing that he probably could have come up with a better way of training him despite being a child himself at the time. Danny comes to the realization that more than anything, that he just wants to apologize.
His ghost form, specifically is outfit, is a combination of his hazmat suit and his uniform from the league, and he carries a sword with him. He also doesn't know how to react to Dani, honestly. Although it is fair to say that he figures out she's a clone instantly because of her whole 'I'm your third cousin once removed' thing and he freaks out. She spills the beans pretty quickly after that. And Danny is pretty skittish around her - or the equivalent of skittish. Her being younger than him kinda reminds him of Damian, so he's uncomfortable by her presence but learns to warm up to her.
#dpxdc#dp x dc#dp x dc crossover#danny fenton is not the ghost king#dpxdc crossover#dpdc#dpxdc headcanons#dp x dc headcanons#danyal al ghul: exists#me: lets give him emotional constipation :) as a treat#older brother danny#sam+tucker: dude... were you part of a cult???? danny: excuse me? sam+tucker: were you. part of a cult#danny: it was not a *cult--* sam+tucker: oh my god you were part of a cult. that explains sO MUCH#danny is pr morally grey even at 15. he's starting to get the hang of this 'human life' thing though! he thinks.#but he is still the embodiment of that tiktok audio 'why dont we just kill these fucking people' even if he keeps it to himself sometimes#sam+tucker+jazz: dont litter danny: yes of course thats obvious s+t+j: okay then dont *kill* danny: now you've lost me#danny nearly stabbed dash when they first met. more accurately he nearly took off his finger like the train scene from the mummy movie 2#with alex and that big guard guy who stabbed the table in between his fingers. “woah.” “Tt. i missed”#late night starry posts#not proof read and thus there will prolly be mistakes
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one thing i really wish people wouldn’t forget when it comes to suguru’s character is that his core desire is just to have a family. not in a nuclear family way, but in a “i want a place where i belong / i want to protect the ones i love” way…… literally everything else is just an extension of that desire. a means to meet that end. he broke down after being forced to realize that staying with his family meant having to watch them die, so he left and made a new one. and he got stronger. and his core wish was always, always always to create a world where he’d finally be able to protect them :(((((((((
#don’t get me wrong geto is absolutely twisted and deluded and downright cruel#and that’s not something you should or could look away from when analyzing his character#but i also think it’s wrong to look away from this part of him because it’s in EVERYTHING he is and does!!!!!#one of the big tipping points for him was the realization that being a sorcerer meant choosing civilians over his family#he just wanted a place where he belonged. he just wanted his loved ones to be safe#suguru is very very selfish at his core and a big part of that selfishness is connected to those desires#he protects His People. his family.#he loves them so sincerely and protects them so fervently#idk it’s just . easy to forget i think. because cult leader geto is bitter and sad and pathetic#but he also has such a sincere love for those he keeps close and i think that makes him sooooo much more interesting#like yes his goal was stupid but that goal was never the actual point. he just needed it to keep himself alive#he needed something to give his actions Meaning#and the something he ended up settling on was the idea of a world where he could protect his loved ones .#and that says soooo much about him…..#sorry i woke up thinking of him </3#my princess 😔😔#ari noises ✩
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P1 clara route oh my god
#okay so she’s been my favorite for a hot minute#but actually playing her route is a totally different experience#like. fuck. this is a character literally made for me#it is shocking to see media that depicts so accurately what being stuck in a cult mentality is like#her whole dynamic with Katerina is INSANE to me#as someone with some personal experience in a situation like that. good lord#all interactions with block hit me like a GUT PUNCH#ik fanon casts him as her dad sometimes but he made my skin crawl#the fervent and desperate way he exalts her was just horrifying#and Clara accepting this from people because its the only way she will ever be loved#her entire story is about destruction being a child#and all children want is to be loved#and yet. the only person who loves her without condition is the twin she invented with a lie#it is so heartbreaking i need to lay DOWN#pathologic#pathologic 2#digital art#clara pathologic#clara saburova#pathologic classic hd
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☆ de fontaine
{☆} characters furina {☆} notes cult au, imposter au, drabble, gender neutral reader {☆} warnings angst, suicidal thoughts, hurt / no comfort {☆} word count 1.4k
This wasn't fair. This wasn't fair. This wasn't fair!
She thought, for one moment, she could put the mask down and breathe – for one moment of daydreaming, she thought she could just be Furina. She thought she would finally get to live the live she should've had in the first place, the life she threw away to play God to an audience who saw her as nothing but a circus animal, dancing to their whims. Furina just wanted to be selfish for one brief and fleeting moment..and it was gone before she could even grasp it in her hand. A comet soaring past far out of her reach.
She can barely keep her hands from violently shaking as she looks down at them – broken and bloody and more a corpse then a person – and she feels so numb she can't even feel the rain pelting against her back. None of this is fair, she wants to scream, why is it always me? But her voice is silent beneath the torrent of rain. She wonders if the ocean would take her if she sank into it's depths – just for a moment, she wonders how it would feel to finally be able to sleep at ease.
Furina is tired.
But Furina is nothing if not useful, isn't she?
So she forces her feet to move, dragging against the stone beneath her heels, and drags their bloodied body into the nearest empty building, letting the rain do the work of washing away the smeared blood following her path. The smell makes her feel sick, the feeling of it sticking to her hands and gloves makes her lightheaded, but she persists. Because Furina is useful, because Furina won't let them die out in the rain, because Furina won't stand by and just let them rot on the streets like some..pest.
Furina wants to go home. She wants to sleep and she isn't she if she wants to wake up, this time. But she keeps going anyway.
Because it's all she's ever done, and the habit sticks.
An Archon she may not be, not anymore, but the expectations of five hundred years still linger like eyes on the inside of her skull. They watch her, pry and prod at her thoughts, mocking laughter and judging eyes following her as she forces herself to dance to the song they weave with glee. Furina never stepped off that stage – she's still there, she thinks, watching the crowd stare at her in disdain as the curtain call looms above her like a guillotine. She still hears Neuvillette deliver her damnation and salvation with a trembling voice, still feels her hair stand on end when electro crackled like the crack of the whip, Clorinde's blade aimed at her like a loaded gun.
She's trapped on that stage and she never left, not really.
She hates it. She thinks she hates them, but it's not their fault. They didn't ask for this, didn't ask for everyone to turn against them, didn't ask for her to save them. Neither did she..yet here they are, she thinks.
She tries to tell herself she's in control this time, though. She can stop performing her part in this horrible, bloody play any time she wants. It makes her feel better, just for a little while, if she convinces herself she's still Furina, painfully human.
And Furina has always been good at lying.
It's the believing that's the hard part.
There isn't time for her to wallow in her own self pity, though. They're still bleeding out onto the dusty, creaky floorboards of some random, broken down house and she's just standing there as the blood stains the wood. She can fix it – she's good at fixing things. She's done nothing but fix things – try to, anyway – for five hundred years. She can fix a little wound, how hard could it be? Her hands are clenched so tight they ache as she kneels down, wincing at the creak of the floorboards beneath her heels– she hesitates just long enough to wonder if she's making a mistake before she peels away just enough of the outer layer of their clothes to see the deep, bloody gash across their chest. She tries not to think about it – it's deep, too deep, and she feels dizzy just looking at it, but she's handled worse, right?
Furina can fix it. That's what she's good at.
She doesn't feel so confident when she tries to wrack her brain for..something. Five hundred years, and a little wound stumps her? No, she had to have learned something, right? She's decidedly not trying to buy time because she's panicking, parsing through hundreds of years of memories like flipping through a book. Furina isn't made for this, not really – she's running on nothing but adrenaline and she's really not sure what she's doing, but she's trying. And just like before, it won't be enough, will it?
She'll fall short again – she'll be too late to fix it before she's alone again.
Furina was an Archon..used to be. What use would she have for that sort of knowledge? Which makes her predicament all the more harrowing and bleak. What was she supposed to do?
Furina had heard it first hand, that vitriol in Neuvillette's voice. She isn't sure she's ever heard him that..angry before. She's not sure he would listen to her if she tried, either. And that scares her more then anything. All of Fontaine was up in arms about this..imposter, yet here she was, staring down at them bleeding out in front of her, and she was trying to save them.
Why? Why is she throwing away her only chance at normalcy for a fraud? Why didn't she just turn them in?
They were dying – that should've been a good thing, shouldn't it? So why didn't it feel like it?
"Why you?" Her voice breaks as she speaks in harsh tones, grabbing the front of their shirt in trembling, bloodied hands. "Why now?" She wants to scream, to demand answers they can't give, to claw back the reprieve she was promised after five hundred years of agony..and all she can do is sob into their chest, pleading for an answer that will not come. "Why me?"
Silence is their answer, and it hangs heavy on her trembling shoulders as she cries.
Of course they don't, she thinks bitterly, no one has ever answered her pleas spoken in hushed sobs. Not her other self and certainly not them.
Furina has always been alone. Furina will always be alone.
Because Furina never left that stage, never left that moment when she looked at herself in the mirror and took up a mantle too heavy for her to bear. She always finds her way back eventually. There's no one on the other side anymore – she stands alone on a stage, waiting for an inevitable end she isn't sure will come.
"Please," She pleads through tears and choked sobs, clinging to them like they are all that keeps her from sinking. "Please don't leave me, too." The words burn on her tongue – how pathetic is she that she craves companionship from the bloodied body of the imposter? Perhaps she's truly lost her mind after all these years..perhaps she's finally gone mad. She must have.
But their presence is like the first feeling of gentle warmth upon her skin as the sun crests the horizon, like the gentle lap of tides along her heels, the sway of branches and leaves as the wind blows through them like an instrument all it's own. They are the soothing sound of rain against the window as she watches the dreary skies in fond longing, the first bloom of spring as color blooms upon the landscape like paint had been spilled across the hills and valleys.
They are like the faint spark she carefully nurtures and stokes, so fragile even the smallest wind could blow it out like a candle. She cradles it within her palms, pleads with whoever will listen – prays that someone finally listens, because if not for her, then for them.
She's failed to protect too much already, let too many people with so much trust in her fall between the cracks of her fingers like grains of sand. She won't let them go – she can't.
If nothing else, if she couldn't be saved when she begged for salvation from that five hundred year long agony, even if she never got that chance..
Furina will make sure they do.
#sagau#genshin sagau#self aware genshin#genshin impact sagau#self aware genshin impact#genshin cult au#genshin impact cult au#fic tag#furina#so um. looks around. okay look. i know im like THE ts@r1ts@ dealer (censored so it doesnt show in tags. hopefully)#but the moment i saw furi in fontaine the day it released she became my fav even more then the tsaritsa SORRY SHES SO..#this is my love letter 2 furi (making her suffer unimaginable horrors)#open ended kinda in case i decide on making a sequel maybe#furi makes me feel cuteness aggression so bad i start acting like a rabid animal#furina the woman that you are. thats my girlprince meow meow id kill someone for her#playing her part as archon so well but being so horribly irrefutably human in every way..#five hundred years not even knowing what the real plan was. when it would end. knowing if she slipped up it was over.#and in the end almost no one knew what really happened. a select few people know the real weight of her sacrifice.#furina's story was always a tragedy. it was never going to be anything but a tragedy.#and thats one of the most tragic parts of it isnt it? she didnt know how itd end. she didnt know her story was always going to be a tragedy#furina never knew a thing. and still she did it for the people of fontaine and succeeded.#how do you define “yourself” when you havent existed for 500 years?#to be so selflessly human you give up “yourself” to save people who will never know of your sacrifice.#sometimes i think about the confrontation on the stage and have a week long mental breakdown#sacrificing EVERYTHING for fontaine and still. still! the people closest to you turn on you.#heavy on clorinde. she was as close 2 furi as neuvi fight me on this. i bite.#her bodyguard and friend and she ends up staring down her blade wondering if this is it. she failed. she failed them all#because even when faced with the trial. with losing everything. she still thought only about fontaine. oh furina.#do you think she has nightmares. wonders if she was never meant to win this game of g-ds. that her story was always meant to be a tragedy?#do you think she still wonders if she was ever meant to have a chance at a happy ending? a doomed tragedy from beginning to end
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