#with extra mutual pining tossed in

[eaudecrow]

What if my faves with Victorian levels of repression… were actually Victorian

[carolperkinsexgirlfriend]

it's the next best thing - part three (ao3)

part one || part two

Steve Harrington/Eddie Munson || ~22k, complete || phone sex || accidental love confessions || there was only one bed || getting together || mutual pining || porn with plot || smut || wet & messy || friends with benefits || oral sex || rimming

This is the final installment of my gift for @eyesofshinigami for @steddieexchange!

Eddie keeps calling, and Steve always answers. He wears a watch now, wants to count down the seconds until he’ll be able to hear Eddie’s voice again.

He doesn’t want to put a name to the thing fluttering around in his chest as the sound of Eddie’s voice filters down the line. Sometimes, Eddie invites him over, and that’s worse somehow. His skin aches to touch, cross any distance Eddie places between them in his bed, on his couch, in his van at the quarry, smoking together and watching the stars.

The phone sex is slowly replaced with the real thing, hands and bodies fumbling together in the darkness of Eddie’s room.

Eddie still calls, always, updating him on the latest Hellfire session, how Corroded Coffin is doing, what he’s been up to all day.

Sometimes Steve comes over, and they don’t even fuck. On those nights, settled in Eddie’s bed, listening to his even breathing, Steve has to remind himself that this is what friends do. It doesn’t mean anything that Eddie sleeps so soundly at his side, and it doesn’t mean anything when he wakes up with Eddie’s arms around him, face nuzzled into Steve’s neck, breaths puffing wetly against his neck, morning wood pressed into Steve’s hip.

“Why don’t you just tell him?” Robin asks, head propped up by her hands, arms crossed beneath her head, elbow linked with Steve who’s laying right beside her.

They’ve been camped out in the Buckley’s living room all day, spending one of their rare days off together watching movies and tossing popcorn into each other’s mouths. When Robin had missed one too many times, she’d retaliated against Steve by dumping her entire bowl of extra-buttery popcorn atop his head.

“What if he doesn’t feel the same?” Steve whispers back, not looking away from the Buckley’s popcorn ceiling even as he feels Robin shift at his side.

He feels Robin’s arm slip free from his own, leaving him bereft. But then she’s hovering over him, cupping his cheeks with hands still slippery with butter and staring deeply into his eyes. “That boy is head over heels for you, dingus,” she says, not even blinking. When Steve tries to avert his gaze, she grabs his face more tightly, fingernails digging into skin. “It’s impossible not to be in love with you, okay?”

There’s a knot lodged in his throat as he stares up at the other half of his soul. “You’re not.”

She slaps him lightly, hit gentled even further by her oily palm. “I’m a lesbian,” she hisses, voice quiet like even though they’d gone out hours ago, she’s afraid her parents might hear her. “And you know I’d marry you in a heartbeat.”

“I always wanted a sexless marriage,” Steve replies.

“That’s what Eddie’s for.”

Steve shoves her off and wrestles her to the ground. They grapple like children, but Steve’s laughing now, hope bubbling out of him at every seam, like all he’d needed was Robin’s words to be able to picture a future he wants to grow old in.

Steve and Robin, a sexless marriage, and Eddie in his bed, at his side, so intertwined with his life that they’d need a crowbar to pry him out.

Robin wins the wrestling match, forearm against his chest pressing him down into the carpet. Steve’s future’s spooling out in front of him, he can almost taste the too-sweet coffee Eddie would make every morning, the rubbery eggs Eddie and Robin would serve with pride.

“You really think he likes me?” Steve asks, quiet, hopeful, wistful.

Robin snorts and drops down to his chest, rubbing her face against his shirt. “That boy’s in love with you,” she says with so much confidence that Steve almost believes her. “No way in hell he’s just in it for the sex.”

Steve hums but doesn’t reply. There’s nothing to say, no way to describe the squirming, writhing feelings lodged beneath his sternum, kicked up into a flurry by Robin’s words. He wraps his arms around her and squeezes tight, burying his nose in her hair, Sandra Dee serenading Danny Zuko on the TV behind them.

The movie plays to its inevitable conclusion: the boy always gets the girl in the movies, and as the credits roll, Steve glances down at his watch.

He jumps up on instinct, sending Robin sprawling on the carpet with a grunt. “The fuck?”

“It’s almost nine!” Steve cries rushing around the Buckley’s living room, picking up his wallet and keys from where they’d fallen out of his pocket. “I missed it!”

“Just call him,” Robin says, propping herself up on her elbows but otherwise not moving from where he’d left her.

“I don’t have his number,” Steve replies, already stuffing his feet into his sneakers, heels crushing the backs as he tries to wedge them on without having to untie them.

Eddie calls him, always. Steve has never called him back, has never had to.

“I do!” Robin calls, but Steve barely hears her, already out of the house and toward his car, ready to break every speed limit in the book to get to the Munson’s trailer in record time.

What will Eddie think? Will he be worried? Will he think Steve forgot about him? Or worse, will he not care at all?

He peels out of the Buckley’s drive and speeds like his life depends on it.

***

For the first time, Steve doesn’t answer when Eddie calls. Keith had hung up on him after confirming that Steve was off that day, and the Harrington house had just rang and rang before kicking him to the answering machine.

He doesn’t leave a message.

Is this the beginning of the end? First a few missed phone calls, and then pretty soon Eddie hasn’t seen Steve in three weeks. Ten years down the line they’ll pass each other in the grocery store and give those polite little head nods that people give when they used to know someone and don’t anymore.

He collapses onto the couch, pulling the blanket from its back to huddle into as his brain ticks away. It’s just—he knows there could be a million reasons Steve didn’t answer. Really, he does. But, this thing they have has always had an expiration date on it, and he can feel that thought curdling in his brain like rotten milk.

When someone knocks on the door, he doesn’t get up.

The knocks get quicker and louder, like whoever’s out there thinks he might not have heard them. Eddie should open the door before they bust it down, but he’s too busy being in his blanket cocoon, wallowing in his tragic, unrequited feelings.

When the door opens, he freezes.

Footsteps sound into the room, sounding loud against the carpet. Who just walks into someone else’s home when they don’t answer? A robber? But, no, they wouldn’t knock, would they?

“Eddie?”

He bolts up, peering over the back of the couch, blanket still around his shoulders. There, Steve Harrington stands, hair all fucked up like he’d been running his hands through it, eyes trained unerringly on Eddie where he sits, stupefied.

Steve’s wearing the same goddamn sweats as the first time he’d come over, with a cutoff Bowie shirt that has Buckley written all over it, cut short enough that Eddie can see his happy trail, and just the hint of his belly button.

“What are you doing here?” Eddie asks, and it’s only as his voice scratches out of his throat that he realizes he must’ve been crying.

Steve must realize at the exact same time because he says, “have you been crying?” as he takes three quick strides to hover over Eddie, grabbing his cheeks in both hands and rubbing the tacky tear stains off his skin. Eddie averts his gaze, glancing down so he doesn’t have to look at Steve’s imploring face, but that puts him looking directly at his hairy stomach and that’s no better.

Even now, Eddie wants to lick it.

“No,” Eddie says, not looking up until Steve moves one of his hands to below Eddie’s chin and forces his face up.

“Why have you been crying?” Steve asks quietly.

Eddie swallows. It’s loud in the quiet of the living room, no background noise to mask the sound. “You didn’t answer,” he says, and it feels telling, somehow. Like Steve will hear the confession lurking beneath the words.

Steve sighs and sinks down to his knees, putting his face just below Eddie’s, the couch creating a barrier between them that aches like an open wound. “I was at Robin’s,” Steve says, still holding Eddie’s chin gently. “I lost track of time.”

There’s an apology lurking beneath the simple words, and suddenly, Eddie’s so fucking tired of the way they talk around each other, neither saying what they actually mean. “I thought maybe you were done with me,” Eddie says, voice rasping, unused to saying the honest truth.

“No,” Steve blurts, eyes wider than Eddie’s ever seen them. He crowds into Eddie’s space as much as he can with the couch in the way. “Never Eddie, I love you.”

While Eddie’s entire world shifts and rearranges with those words, he sees the exact moment Steve realizes what he just said. His face blanches, eyes widening even further, so much white showing on the edges of that beautiful brown until he sinks down on his heels, wrenching his hands free of Eddie so he can use them to cover his own face.

Eddie stares at him, words ringing in his head. I love you, I love you, I love you. Eddie’s never heard them before, not in this setting, from someone who isn’t Uncle Wayne. The feeling bursts through him, a supernova of light that has him leaning precariously over the back of the couch to yank Steve’s hands off of his face so he can stare into his wide, startled, beautiful eyes, as he asks, “do you really?”

Before Steve even has a chance to answer, Eddie’s leaned too far and toppled off of the couch, sending them both sprawling into the carpet. His elbow smacks into the ground and he doesn’t even care, too busy crawling onto Steve’s supine form and kissing anywhere he can reach. “Really, Stevie?” he asks between each press of lips. “Do you?”

“Yes?” Steve replies, sounding so unsure that Eddie can’t help what he does next.

For the first time, Eddie presses his lips into Steve’s and takes what he’s wanted all along: everything Steve will give him.

***

Steve’s head aches dully from where it smacked against the floor, but he doesn’t care. Eddie’s lips are soft against his. Steve lays on the Munson’s dirty carpet, unmoving with shock as Eddie presses gentle kiss after gentle kiss into Steve’s unresponsive lips. His eyes are open as he stares up at the shadows Eddie’s lashes create on his cheeks, elongated in the dim slanting light filtering across him from the floor ramp in the corner of the living room. 

There’s a dreamy quality to Steve’s thoughts as they tumble around his brain—he’s already mourning the moment he wakes up.

It feels like dying when Eddie pulls back, eyes open now, and mouth frowning down at him. “Sorry, did I misread that?” he asks, squinting down at Steve. “It’s just, you said—and I thought—shit, I’m sorry!”

It’s as Eddie starts to get up, scrambling out of his lap like it’s radioactive, that Steve begins to realize that he’s in the Munson’s living room, awake and aflame with an aching want as the man he loves clambers off of him because Steve didn’t kiss him back.

He didn’t kiss him back.

“No!” Steve cries, too loud in the quiet of the room, arms reaching behind Eddie’s back and yanking him down. Eddie’s bony hips bite into his skin, but Steve doesn’t care. “No, you didn’t—just, what’s happening, man?”

Eddie stops trying to escape, palms big and sure against Steve’s chest as he props himself up, squinting down at Steve in blatant confusion. “Well, first you said you loved me,” Eddie replies, tapping one of his fingers against Steve’s sternum like he’s counting out the order of events for him. “I said it, too, and then you didn’t kiss me back, so I’m lost here… man.”

Eddie’s mouth twists wryly as he tacks on the last word, mockingly amused by Steve the way he always is. Steve notices the smile, he notices everything about Eddie, but his mind’s too caught on Eddie’s words to appreciate it.

“You didn’t,” Steve replies, something unrecognizable in his voice—wonder, maybe. Awe. Eddie’s got a little confused furrow between his brows, so Steve reaches out to smooth it out. “You love me?”

Eddie’s eyes blow wide, brows going up until his forehead’s all crinkled up. “I didn’t?” It’s a question, but Eddie’s already nodding before Steve gets a chance to answer, sharp enough to knock Steve’s hand off from between his eyes. Steve trails it down, settling fingertips lightly against Eddie’s cheekbone, thumb rubbing reverently against his jawline.

Eddie leans forward, fingers trailing up over his chest, over his neck, big hands cupping the expanse of both Steve’s cheeks as he leans down, close enough that all Steve can see is the dark brown expanses of Eddie’s eyes.

“Steve Harrington,” he says, voice solemn. Steve’s gaze flickers back and forth, trying to read every little thought that flits behind those beautiful eyes. “I love you.”

Steve sucks in a breath, and it lodges there, somewhere deep in his lungs. The silence hangs between them, charged with enough electricity to restart his heart.

“…man,” Eddie tacks on again, and Steve chokes on a laugh, breath rushing out of him as Eddie grins, every one of his teeth on display.

“You’re the fucking worst,” Steve whispers as he drags Eddie down, any reply he might have gotten trapped between their mouths.

It’s all teeth at first, Eddie laughing into the kiss until Steve sucks Eddie’s bottom lip into his mouth and bites down hard enough to make him gasp. Steve takes the invitation that’s given, swiping his tongue shallowly into Eddie’s panting mouth just to listen to him whine.

The sound activates something in Steve—something dark that just wants to take. Steve shoves at Eddie’s shoulder hard enough to knock him off Steve’s lap and onto his side on the carpet. He keeps shoving until Eddie’s on his back, pupils blown, hair in a fucked up halo around his head as he looks up at Steve reverently, as if he’s the one that’s divine.

He wastes no time crawling over Eddie’s body, pushing at his knees until his legs are spread wide, kept open by Steve’s weight settling between them.

Eddie, always easy, is already gasping and writhing beneath him, humping up against Steve erratically, desperately trying to get any pressure against the bulge in his jeans. Steve leans back far enough that he can press his forearm into Eddie’s hips, hard enough to still his movements.

Eddie whines, bucking against his hold. Steve waits, watching his needy face twist into something torturous as Eddie realizes that Steve’s not budging. His eyes are scrunched closed hard enough that stars must be bursting beneath his lids. Winded and petulant, finally, Eddie stills.

Steve doesn’t move, doesn’t say anything, until Eddie opens his eyes, lashes wet as he looks up at Steve. He opens his mouth to speak, but clicks it back shut when Steve digs his fingernails gently into Eddie’s hip.

“The fucking worst,” Steve says again.

Eddie swallows, Adam’s apple bobbing with the movement. Steve wants to tip Eddie’s chin up, bite against that spot, suck on it until Eddie begs him to stop.

But then Steve flicks his eyes back up at Eddie’s face, and he gets caught on his lips. His mouth’s slick with spit, bottom lip plumped from Steve sucking on it. When Eddie’s tongue darts out and wets them further, Steve’s lost.

He’s powerless to resist removing his hold from Eddie’s hips, letting their bodies slide back together so he can kiss Eddie’s wanting mouth. Eddie writhes against him again, hips rabbiting up. Steve wants to press him back into the carpet, keep his stupid fucking handcuff belt from clacking with his movements, but he can’t bring himself to stop kissing Eddie’s lips long enough to achieve it.

He settles for delving into Eddie’s mouth with his tongue, shoving it far enough back that Eddie chokes on it. He goes slack beneath him, mouth open wide, practically begging Steve to go deeper. He can feel Eddie’s erratic heartbeat from where his hand is cradling his neck, thumb pressed hard into his pulse point.

Only when he feels like he’s about to pass out does Steve leans back far enough to catch his breath. They’re both panting into each other’s open mouths. There’s a tremor running through Eddie’s entire body as he gazes up at Steve, eyes half mast.

“Steve,” he pleads, asking for something with just his eyes.

Steve rubs his neck, soothing him like a lame horse as he asks, “what do you need, baby?”

Eddie’s eyes shut, and he shudders as the term of endearment leaves Steve’s mouth. Steve keeps rubbing his skin, smoothing over acne scars and freckles alike as he waits for Eddie’s brain to come back online.

He opens his eyes, pupils blown all to shit as he looks up at Steve, still silent, still begging.

“What do you need?” Steve asks again.

Eddie swallows, cheeks darkening from a lustful pink to a painful-looking red as he finally, blessedly answers. “In my mouth?” he asks. When all Steve does is continue to rub his neck, he clarifies, blush traveling from the apples of his cheeks all the way to his ears. “Your dick in my—in my mouth.”

Steve leans down to kiss his cheek, the blood pooling beneath Eddie’s skin warm against his lips. “Anything you want,” Steve murmurs against his skin. “Thank you for telling me.”

Eddie shudders, dick twitching against Steve’s from the confines of his pants, but he doesn’t otherwise move as he waits to find out what Steve will do.

What he does is scramble back, too far gone to play it cool any longer as he shoves his sweatpants down just far enough that his painfully hard cock springs free. At the sight of Steve bared before him, Eddie bucks against him again, trying to knock him off. Steve sits down hard, settling his full weight on Eddie, pinning him to the carpet.

Eddie melts, stilling as he looks up at Steve like he’s something precious. It hits Steve straight in the sternum, that look—lust intertwined so inexorably with love that Steve can’t figure out where one ends and the other begins.

No one’s ever looked at him that way before.

Eddie waits beneath him, suddenly a font of patience as he waits for Steve to rise above the tide of emotion, cock still hard in the warm air of the Munson’s living room. The tide swallows him up—Steve lets it, nothing but love in his voice as he grabs his hard length, scoots up Eddie’s supine form, and nudges at his chin until his mouth drops open, warm breaths puffing against where he’s most sensitive.

“Open up,” Steve murmurs, hand moving from his chin, caressing up to his smooth cheek as he slides into Eddie’s warm, open heat.

***

Steve’s weight is pinning Eddie down into the carpet, hand firm enough against his face that no matter how hard he tries, he can’t get more than the tip of Steve’s dick into his mouth. He’d lost all sense of time somewhere between Steve telling Eddie he loved him and sliding himself into Eddie, but it feels like hours have passed with Steve shallowly thrusting into his mouth.

Eddie sucks on the head, trying to get a little more, aching to be filled. He whines when Steve pulls back out, pace unhurried as his thighs flex against Eddie’s ribs, barely pressing himself back inside. Eddie moans, low enough in his throat that his tongue vibrates against the head of Steve’s dick. Steve jerks, thrusts in deeper with a grunt. 

Steve’s cock’s deep enough that he’s choking on it, mind blank as he gasps for air. “Fuck, your mouth,” Steve mutters as he shifts back, almost pulling himself free entirely.

That’s the idea, Eddie tries to say, words coming out unintelligibly garbled around Steve’s length. The vibrations must feel good because Steve thrusts in again, harder this time, head barely breaching the back of his throat. Eddie whines, scrabbling unseeingly for Steve’s hips, trying to keep him there, so deep that Eddie’s lips are pressed against his pubes.

It doesn’t work, Eddie’s grip is too weak to stop Steve from pulling back as Eddie cries futilely on his cock. But this time, while Eddie sucks hard at the head of Steve’s dick, he thrusts in again, fast enough that it almost hurts.

He does it again. And again. And again, until Eddie’s hands go lax, lost to the sensations playing against his tongue. He swirls it around Steve’s shaft, memorizing the musky taste of his warm skin, senses overwhelmed as he loses all sense of reality.

Steve’s all-consuming, eating up Eddie’s remaining higher brain functions until he can only think in monosyllabic words like more, and fuck, and come. He’s harder than he’s been in his life, dick painfully pressed into the confines of his still-buttoned jeans as he humps up into the air, desperate.

Steve shifts his hand from Eddie’s cheek and into his hair, gripping his tangled tresses to yank his head up, craning his neck uncomfortably as he pushes himself impossibly deeper. Eddie gags, jaw straining around the girth of Steve’s cock, light headed from oxygen deprivation.

Steve pulls out, letting go of the hold on his hair suddenly enough that Eddie’s head thunks into the carpet, eyes staring unseeingly up at the ceiling until Steve’s own worried face blocks it out. 

“You okay?” he asks, hands brushing gently against his cheeks, trailing over his neck and down beneath the collar of his shirt like he’s looking for wounds.

“Why’d you stop?” Eddie asks, the sound of his own gravely voice sending another wave of lust through him that has his hips twitching, neck straining to get Steve back in his mouth. “Please, please, please.”

“You’re crying, baby,” Steve whispers, hands still too soft against him.

Eddie blinks, only then noticing the burn of his eyes, the way his eyelashes are clumping together. “Want it,” Eddie begs, voice fucked. “Please.”

Steve stares at him for another endless second, unblinking. Eddie watches something unfathomable shift behind Steve’s eyes, understanding dawning into something darker, as Steve scrambles back just enough that he can lick the tacky tears off of Eddie’s cheeks and out of his lashes once Eddie closes his eyes.

Then Steve’s tongue is back in Eddie’s mouth, wetter than before like Steve had let saliva pool in the back of his throat before feeding it to him. His tongue fucks into his mouth, licking so far into him that he must be able to taste his own precome at the back of Eddie’s throat. Steve doesn’t stop when Eddie chokes. Eddie wants more.

As if hearing his thoughts, Steve pulls back, ignoring Eddie’s bereft whining as he straddles his ribs again, sure fingers gathering up Eddie’s hair tenderly at the back of his skull before clenching his fist, pulling against the hair follicles hard enough that Eddie’s eyes start watering.

Steve doesn’t hesitate this time as he fucks into Eddie’s mouth, yanking Eddie’s face up and down in time with his thrusts, using him for his own satisfaction.

He’s never been more turned on in his life.

His own hips are twitching, desperate for anything as Steve thrusts again, and again, and again, forcing Eddie to take what he’s given.

As Steve’s thrusts grow sloppy, he lowers Eddie’s head to the carpet, letting go of his hair entirely to grind himself against Eddie’s face. He’s deeper than he’s ever been, the entire head of his cock in Eddie’s throat, devolving into a dirty grind, barely thrusting like he can’t bear to part from the warm clutch of Eddie’s body even for a second.

Eddie’s so lightheaded that spots are bursting behind his eyes, and his throats convulsing as he gags against the intrusion. 

It’s loud in the quiet of the living room, the dirty wet sound of Steve’s cock pushing itself into Eddie’s throat, forcing him to take all that he has to give until he’s gagging, that sound somehow just as wet, just as lewd. Eddie can’t hear anything else, ears muffled by the press of Steve’s thighs against his ears. 

His brain’s gone numb, oxygen deprived and fucked stupid as Steve, takes, and takes, and takes until Eddie’s crying with it. 

Steve doesn’t stop—Eddie doesn’t want him to. He’s hardly been touched, and yet he damn-near feels like he might come just from the musty taste on his tongue.

He wants to die with Steve Harrington’s cock down his throat.

But when Steve’s dick starts twitching, he pulls it out, ignoring Eddie’s begging as he strips it, tip close enough to Eddie’s mouth that he can almost taste it. He opens his mouth, ravenous for anything Steve will give him.

“Please,” Eddie asks, and like that’s all he’d been waiting for, Steve’s cock pulses and spills, creamy white liquid painting itself all over Eddie’s face.

He milks himself through it, waiting until every drop has been spilled before he lets go of his spent cock and uses his fingers to spread the mess around Eddie’s face, scooping up come and tears alike and feeding them into Eddie’s panting, open mouth.

Eddie closes his mouth around the intrusion and sucks.

“What do you need?”

***

Eddie’s sucking on his fingers, eyes closed, tongue sliding sensually between them like he can’t bear to miss a drop of the come Steve had fed into his mouth. Steve’s soft cock gives a valiant twitch where it’s drooping between his legs. If he hadn’t just come harder than he had in his entire life, this would be enough to send him over the edge.

“Eddie,” Steve says, pulling his fingers free and using both hands to grab Eddie’s sticky cheeks, waiting until his hazy eyes open to ask again, “what do you need?”

Eddie’s twitching beneath him, hips rolling like all he wants is to fuck something, but when he finally speaks, he says, “fuck me,” with enough need that it comes out as a command.

Steve’s dick twitches again before slumping pitifully back into itself.

“I just came,” Steve says, feeling orgasm dumb and almost as desperate as Eddie. Eddie closes his eyes again, sniffs like he’s going to fucking cry, he’s so horny. Steve pets at his cheek, suddenly desperate to give him anything he wants.

Steve tucks himself back into his sweats, sliding off Eddie, entire body shaky as he kneels between his raised knees, hands trembling against the handcuff clasp of his belt. The handcuffs clacking against each other is loud as it echoes through the room. “This fucking belt,” Steve mutters, fingers fumbling to get it open. “So fucking loud over the phone, Eddie, you have no fucking idea.”

Eddie groans, hips twitching, making undoing said belt even harder, but when Steve’s gaze snaps up, Eddie’s mouth is hanging open, lips still covered in Steve’s own spend. He stares, gobsmacked by the sight of him once more—the mess he’s made of him. But, when Eddie’s hips twitch again, Steve trails his gaze back down, flicking his wrist just right to unclasp the stupid belt.

“Do you know how fucking crazy it made me,” Steve demands, belt clacking loudly as he shoves it out of the way, fingers shaking against the button of his jeans.

“You’re one to talk,” Eddie replies, voice gravelly and wrecked. Steve wants to pour honey down his throat, soothe the ache before fucking that rasp right back into his mouth all over again. “Those fucking sweatpants, Harrington?”

Steve looks down at his own sweatpants, perplexed. They’re stained with grease on one of his hips, and loose enough to be unflattering. “What—”

“You look so soft,” Eddie cuts in, “want to slide my hand into your pants while you make fucking breakfast.”

The image hits Steve in the chest—him at the stove, Eddie behind him, chin hooked over his shoulder peering into the pan as he slips his hand beneath the waistband of Steve’s sweats, stroking him as he scrambles their eggs.

“Fuck,” Steve says, desperate as he flicks the button on Eddie’s jeans open, yanking them and Eddie’s underwear down together.

Eddie’s dick’s harder than Steve’s ever seen it, tip purple and already leaking like just Steve looking at it is almost enough to send him over the edge. It looks damn-near painful, pointing directly up at the ceiling, waiting for Steve to touch it.

“That’s the idea,” Eddie replies, grinning when Steve looks back up at his face.

It takes a second for Steve to place that as an answer to his expletive, and when he does, he bends down, licking one long stripe up Eddie’s cock just to hear him cry before hooking his arms under Eddie’s knees and shoving them up, practically bending Eddie in half as he makes himself at home between Eddie’s legs.

“What are you—” Steve licks over Eddie’s hole, making Eddie’s question trail off into a startled moan.

When no further questions come his way, Steve adjusts, letting go of Eddie’s legs so they settle over his shoulders, and licks at him again, this time with more purpose, wriggling his way inside the tight heat of Eddie’s body as he twitches.

“Holy shit.”

Steve hums in reply, gratified when the vibration makes Eddie’s entire body jolt like he’s been electrocuted. He does it again, worming his tongue in deeper, the fit tight enough to almost hurt.

He pulls back. “No, no, please,” Eddie begs, voice going quiet and breathing turning erratic as Steve spits on his hole once, twice, three times, thumbs pulling him open enough that the saliva sinks into him. “Shit.”

Steve licks into him again, drawing back just far enough to suck at his rim hard until Eddie shouts. Eddie contracts then loosens, Steve sinking his tongue into him, deeper this time. Eddie’s squirming like he’s not sure whether he wants to move closer or twitch away in overstimulation. Steve doesn’t give him a choice, uses one arm to hold against Eddie’s bent thighs, pressing him into the carpet to keep him still.

His other hand finds its way between them, pointer finger pushing into Eddie’s hole, skin tugging against skin until Steve spits into him and sinks it in smoothly past the first knuckle. Eddie shouts again, entire body vibrating as Steve fucks into him with his finger, torturously slow.

“Good?” Steve asks, finger never stopping its movement as he leans back to survey his spoils. Eddie’s dicks even harder now, and he’s writhing, head shaking back and forth, eyes squeezed shut, mouth open as he pants for breath. “Eddie?”

When he still doesn’t answer, Steve stills his finger where it’s still stuffed inside Eddie’s body, watching as his whole face crumples in on itself. “Eddie,” Steve says again, voice commanding enough that Eddie opens his eyes, tears clinging to his lashes as he peers down at Steve between his legs, gaze hazy and unfocused. “Still good?”

Eddie nods hard enough that his neck cracks. “Don’t stop,” he begs.

Steve doesn’t have to be told twice. He moves his finger again, thrusting with more force as he leans back down, licking around the intrusion with enough pressure that his tongue sinks in right alongside it.

He adds his middle finger, licking between them as he pushes them in deep and then curls them, finding the spot inside Eddie’s body that makes him beg to stop, beg for more, cry for anything.

Eddie’s been hard since before he got Steve’s cock in his mouth, long before Steve had begun finger fucking him in earnest, so he’s not surprised when it only takes a few more thrusts at that spot inside him for Eddie to smack his shoulder hard in warning.

“Steve, Steve, I’m gonna—”

Steve fucks in his fingers harder, hand cramping as he pounds into Eddie’s body even as he clenches around him, mouth suctioning at the side of his rim as he fucks Eddie through it. He keeps it up as Eddie’s legs settle more firmly against Steve, hand dropping bonelessly to the carpet, body going pliant around Steve’s breaching fingers.

Steve leans back, gently removing his fingers and easing Eddie’s boneless legs to the floor. When Steve finally catches sight of his cock, he groans at the sight of the mess Eddie’s made. It’s in his pubes, on his shirt, pooling on his own fucking neck.

He lays over Eddie’s lax body, uncaring of the mess he’s making of his own clothes as he scoops some of the come from Eddie’s neck and slips it into Eddie’s open mouth, waiting for him to suck it clean from his fingers before pulling it free.

He presses his lips to Eddie’s, absurdly gentle for the debauchery now covering Eddie. Steve doesn’t care, so full of love he’s fit to burst. Eddie kisses him back, just as soft, opening up for Steve like a sunflower toward the light.

Steve keeps kissing him, never wants to stop even as his lungs constrict with the need to breathe. When he finally is forced to pull back for air, he keeps his forehead pressed to Eddie’s breathing in the same air that Eddie’s panting out.

They stay like that for a long time.

Eddie’s pliant when Steve finally pulls him up off the floor, and ushers him into the bathroom. He’s quiet when Steve strips him down, pushing him into the shower to clean them both up with soft hands, Eddie half-asleep against his shoulder.

Steve dries him off and brushes his hair while he’s seated on the toilet seat, eyes closed. Eddie leans into each touch like a cat being stroked, soft even in the fluorescent lights of the Munson’s small bathroom. 

“C’mon, baby,” Steve murmurs, pulling him to standing and wrapping a towel around him before leading him through the dark trailer and into his own bedroom.

He digs through Eddie’s discarded clothes until he finds them both clean boxers to change into. Steve ignores Eddie’s little questioning hum as he leaves the bedroom to fetch a glass of water, coming back as quickly as he can.

Eddie’s still standing where he left him, at the foot of the bed, eyes trained on the door. But, when Steve hands him the water, he drinks, wincing as the cold water hits his throat. It must hurt, but he drinks it down. 

Steve takes the empty cup back, leaving it on the desk to tuck them both into Eddie’s cold bed, warming his sheets up with their combined body heat. 

Steve doesn’t know what time it is, but it’s dark, and there’s sleep pulling at him, made more appealing by the warmth of Eddie’s body beneath his hands, heads sharing the same pillow.

“Did you mean it?” Steve whispers, can’t help it with Eddie warm and pliant beside him. “You weren’t just horny?”

Eddie’s eyes are soft in the light filtering in from the window, mouth quirked in amusement as he replies, “I’m always horny.” His hands are gentle as he caresses Steve’s eyebrow, cheekbone, jaw. “But I meant it.” Steve waits, breathless and hopeful for Eddie to say it again.

“I love you.”

Steve tucks his face into Eddie’s neck, kissing the skin he finds there. “Love you, too.”

Eddie’s arms wrap around him, pulling him impossibly closer, hidden away in the safe haven of Eddie’s bedroom, swaddled in worn-soft sheets.

***

For once, Steve’s still in bed when Eddie wakes up. His arm’s slung around Eddie’s waist, a warm brand pushing him into the mattress, and their legs are tangled between them, knees pressed against one another. It’s warm, cozy where the trailer’s usually chilly on a winter morning.

Steve’s head is on the same pillow as Eddie’s, close enough that he can count every one of his eyelashes, breath puffing gently against Eddie’s cheek. He stares at him bathed in the morning light filtering in through his closed curtains, breathless.

He wants to reach out, touch him softly. It takes him a minute to remember that he can.

Steve groans when Eddie’s hand cups his cheek, a small disgruntled sound as he scrunches up his nose in his sleep. Eddie soothes at his jaw with his thumb, enamored. It takes a few brushes against his skin for Steve’s eyes to blink open, still hazy, barely awake. 

When he catches sight of Eddie, he smiles like it’s a reflex, small and sleepy. Eddie leans forward, breaching the scant inches separating them to press his lips to Steve’s gently, mouth open and wet. Steve hums and kisses back, lips just as soft.

It takes a few long moments for Eddie to get his fill and lean back, heart constricting in his chest with the breadth of his feelings when he catches sight of the little smile still on Steve’s face.

“Your mouth tastes like ass,” he says, still smiling all soft and warm even as Eddie sputters.

“Your mouth tastes like ass,” Eddie retorts, jabbing him in the chest when all he does is laugh, voice still sleep-rough. “After all, it wasn’t me who…”

When he trails off, Steve’s grin sharpens, grows fangs as he leans closer to Eddie, their noses brushing as he continues where Eddie left off. “Had a tongue up someone’s asshole.”

He moves reflexively, shoving Steve hard enough to send him tumbling off the edge of the bed, disappearing from sight. He stares at the now-vacant spot beside him for a long moment before scrambling forward on the mattress, peering over the edge. Steve’s splayed out on the carpet, half in a pile of Eddie’s dirty laundry, eyes wide as he stares up at Eddie.

“Shit, sorry, I panicked!” Eddie cries, reaching down toward Steve’s prone body to help him up.

Steve’s fingers wrap around his wrist and he yanks, sending Eddie tumbling off the bed right after him, landing half on top of him as he cackles.

“What the fuck?” Eddie asks, but Steve’s got his arms wrapped around him again, pulling him into his bare chest, and it’s hard to maintain any level of disgruntlement with all that bodily contact.

“Sorry, baby,” he soothes, fingers brushing through Eddie’s hair until he melts into him fully, letting his head settle in the crook of Steve’s neck. “Just wanted you close to me.”

Eddie huffs, but kisses the warm skin beneath his lips. “Smooth talker,” he mutters like it’s a complaint, and not the main reason they’d even gotten this far. If it wasn’t for Steve and his smooth fucking words, Eddie would’ve never moved past cheesy pick-up lines and desperately frequent phone calls. 

Before Eddie can think of something suitably clever to say, there’s a knock on Eddie’s closed bedroom door, and Wayne calls, “boys, breakfast.”

“Coming!” Eddie calls back, even as Steve goes stiff and unyielding beneath him. He plants his hands on Steve’s pectorals, levering himself up enough to peer down into Steve’s spooked face. “You okay?”

Steve swallows, throat clicking dryly as he nods unconvincingly. Eddie stares him down, waiting for the truth to spill out of his stupid, perfect lips. “What if he doesn’t like me?” Steve blurts, face immediately pinking as Eddie stares down at him, gobsmacked.

“Wayne?” Eddie demands, sitting up so he can get a better look at Steve’s expression, knees bracketing his hips. “He loves you.”

“But that was before,” Steve replies, leaning up on his bent elbows, forearms straining beneath his weight as he tilts closer to Eddie, whispering like he’s afraid Wayne’s got his ear pressed up against the door. “Before we started dating.”  

Eddie can’t help the way he grins when that word leaves Steve’s mouth. It’s just—love is one thing, but dating? Dating implies things that Eddie’s been trying desperately not to want. It’s dinner together, and holding hands covertly at the movies, and parking up at the quarry to look at the stars. 

There are actions involved in dating, a future laid out before him if only he’s brave enough to grasp it. Eddie bends his neck down, pressing one quick kiss to Steve’s cheek, afraid that if he goes for the lips, they won’t emerge from this room until breakfast has long since gone cold.

Steve stays on the ground as Eddie jumps up, invigorated, and begins rifling through his drawers for suitable clothing. He pulls on his own change of clothes first, taking the time to pull on jeans and his belt now that he knows it drives Steve crazy.

“Hate to break it to you, Stevie,” Eddie says, throwing a clean shirt toward him with enough accuracy that it blankets his face entirely, “but Wayne definitely already thought we were dating.”

He throws a pair of sweats at him too and saunters out of the room, closing the door on the sound of Steve’s sputtering.

He hits the head, and by the time he leaves the bathroom, Steve’s already sitting at the table, looking sleep-rumpled and warm as he talks with Wayne.

“—stay here much more, and I’ll have half a mind to charge ya rent,” Wayne’s saying as Eddie slides into his seat at the table.

Steve’s smiling as he reaches out, linking his fingers with Eddie’s beneath the table before settling it on the top, for all the world to see. “I can live with that,” he says, squeezing Eddie’s hand, eyes twinkling blindingly at him.

Eddie blushes, and looks down at his plate, already piled with fluffy pancakes. He eats with his left hand, still clutching Steve’s with his right, getting syrup all over in his hair, but it’s worth it for the way Steve’s thumb keeps rubbing against his own. 

Wayne doesn't comment, but Eddie catches him eyeing their hands, something parental and pleased in the way he asks Steve about who he’s rooting for in the latest sportsball tournament. 

He never lets go of Eddie’s hand. 

The phone doesn’t ring until they’re standing side by side at the sink, Eddie washing as Steve dries, the water running cold thanks to Wayne’s morning shower. He hands the plate he’s working on over to Steve and grabs the receiver with soapy hands.

“Yello,” Eddie says, looking over at Steve just to watch him roll his eyes.

“He better be with you,” Robin’s stern voice crackles down the line. “Because no one’s answering at his house, and if he went off to die in the woods or something because you broke his heart—”

“I wouldn’t do that,” Eddie interrupts, unsurprised when Robin talks right over him.

“—I’ll never forgive you, Eddie Munson.”

He waits just long enough to make sure she’s done berating him before turning to Steve, “it’s for you, dear.”

Steve sets the plate he was drying on the rack, and takes the phone from Eddie’s hands.

“Robin?” he asks, somehow so in-tune with his long lost younger twin that he knows it's her even before she’s spoken. Eddie loves them both so fucking much. 

As he goes to finish the dishes alone, he keeps an ear open to Steve’s side of the conversation.

“Sorry, Bobby, I got distracted.” Eddie grins, movements slow as he washes the soap off a mug, unwilling to miss any of the conversation that he can catch. “Yeah, yeah, you were right,” Steve says, sounding exasperated before he drops his voice even lower. But, Steve’s always been a shit whisperer, and Eddie still hears it. “He does like me.”

Eddie grins as he dries the last mug before turning around, bracing his back against the counter as he watches Steve speak to his best friend. He looks soft in Eddie’s borrowed sweatpants, hair going every which way after he’d gone to sleep with it still wet last night. 

Eddie wants to keep him forever. And, as Steve hangs up the phone and pushes into Eddie’s space like he belongs there, it hits him suddenly that he might get to. Maybe, if Eddie’s really lucky, Steve might even want him to. 

“I’ve gotta head to work soon,” Steve murmurs, crowding Eddie into the cupboard and pressing their lips together gently. “But, I’ll see you later?”

For the first time since this whole thing started, he sounds nervous. Hopeful, like there’s any chance at all of Eddie declining. “Whenever you want,” Eddie replies, cupping his face and staring into his eyes. “Any time, any place, I’m yours, baby.”

Steve beams, happy and in love, as he leans forward to press one final kiss against Eddie’s lips, and then he’s gone.

He buzzes for the rest of the day, always on the cusp of rushing out the door to surprise Steve during his shift. But, if calling too soon after the first date is taboo, turning up at their place of work is even worse. What’s the protocol if you’ve been having sex for months and only just put a label on it?

Their usual call system has presumably gone to shit. Steve hadn’t mentioned it, and Eddie was too nervous to ask. They’re dating now, all the previous rules of their relationship overwritten, no matter how he’ll miss Steve every night at eight p.m., the association baked straight into his DNA.

But, Steve hadn’t asked him to call, and Eddie doesn’t know what the fuck he’s doing, so he sits, and he stews, and he waits to hear from Steve, hoping “later” actually translates to “soon.”

Eddie already misses him.

Still, he’s hovering by the phone as the hour hand on the clock creeks closer and closer to eight. He’s not going to call. He won’t. But just as the hand ticks over, the phone rings. 

Eddie rushes to answer, fingers fumbling enough that he drops the receiver and has to dive for it, cracking his knees on the ground. He barely notices the pain as he presses the phone to the side of his face, buzzing with a sickening mix of desperation and excitement. 

“Hello?” he says, embarrassingly breathless as he waits for something besides static to crackle down the line.

“What are you wearing?” Steve asks, voice suggestive and sly.

Eddie grins.

And, that's it! I hope you all enjoyed it! As always, thanks to @queenie-ofthe-void for their wonderful beta editing, and also for encouraging me in getting out of my comfort zone with this one. I couldn't do it without you <3<3<3

[forwards-beckon-rebound]

kiss and cry

summary | you’ve learnt to build your walls sky high in the wake of dick grayson’s abrupt departure from the world of skating. but one decade later, he’s back like nothing ever happened, and you’re back to square one. prompt | language of flowers event: a bouquet of purple hyacinths in blue wrapping paper with a pink ribbon ♡ pairing | dick grayson x gn!reader wc | 3.2k warnings/tags | pairs figure skating, childhood friends to strangers to ???, mutual pining, repressed feelings, angst, swearing, insecurity, no use of y/n, very liberal interpretation of how you’d qualify for the olympics ty @strangergraphics for the divider!

Brian Orser is a liar. 

“Oh c'mon kid, I had no idea. I thought this was a good kind of surprise! You might have a chance at the Olympics this time around!”

You should’ve known something was up when he asked you to stay after practice. The old man is annoyingly close to catching up with you, and if you weren’t wearing skate guards right now, you’d speed walk to the lockers faster. 

“Isn’t this good? You need a new partner, Dick finally decided to call me back, and anyways, I thought you l-”

You don’t need to hear the rest of his sentence to know what he’s about to say. “I didn’t. And I don’t anymore.” Neither of you seem convinced, but at least it gets him to shut up. 

What pains you the most is you can’t even be mad at the older man. You can’t cry, or scream, or throw a tantrum like you were 9 again, because at the end of the day, this is the coach you had begged to take you on. The one who has been behind so many legends and basically built your career up from the ground. Had this been any other situation, any other person, besides the Boy Wonder himself, you would probably be on the verge of much happier tears. But you know, just like last time, he won’t be here to stay. And you don’t know how much more heartbreak you can take.

Before you get the chance to talk him out of it, a pair of footsteps joins you. Speak of the fucking devil.

It’s like they had planned some flanked attack, with Brian herding you towards the front of the building and Dick stepping in to cut you off as you’re about to make your grand escape. No idea, your ass. Brian knew you wouldn’t be able to say no if they had you cornered like this.

“Dick!” he exclaims, pushing past you to wrap the black-haired man in bear hug. Normally, you think you’d be hurt by how his face is practically illuminating (he had never greeted you like that before). But you have your own worries to deal with: namely, a heart that is currently trying to claw its way out of your throat and lungs that have forgotten how to inhale air. You think Brian might still be speaking, but if he is, you’ve tossed that all to the side in lieu of studying the man in front of you.

You make it a point not to meet his gaze, even as you feel him trying to meet yours. Perhaps it’s pride, perhaps it’s fear, but either way, you know as soon as you look at him, properly look at him, any objectivity will fly out the door.

So you settle for the obvious things. He’s taller, and his face is sharper, no longer rounded by baby fat. Even the spiky haircut you used to tease him for is grown out now. He looks good—but nothing like the boy you have enshrined in your memories. This isn’t the boy who would stay behind to help you practice your jumps. This isn’t the boy who would pack an extra lunch for you in case you forgot yours. This isn’t the boy you cried yourself to sleep over for months, the boy who almost made you quit the one thing you loved most in the world because the thought of skating alone made you want to hurl.

This? Him? It’s just a bitter reminder that figure skating wasn’t the only thing he left behind all those years ago. 

You think you hear the two of them discuss the technical details. Practice schedules, song choices, choreography—it all goes in one ear and out the other. It’s a conversation you have with the older man at the start of every season. An annual promise that that year would be the year you finally earn the recognition you had worked so hard for. 

Technically, everything had been perfect. Technically, you were good. Enough to consistently land a spot at the Grand Prix Final.

But not good enough for a medal. It was never enough. No matter how much training you did, how many extra jumps you crammed into your programs, how many partners you had cycled through. There was no use in denying it: after Dick had left, you hadn’t been the same skater.

It’s pathetic. Your crush had not only abandoned you at 14, but any hopes of even making it to the podium had been crushed then as well. And you hate that 10 years later, you still haven’t moved on. Not enough to say no to his offer. Because like it or not, chemistry is everything in pairs, and there’s nobody like him. There is nobody like Dick Grayson.

It’s silent now. They’re waiting for you. 

You finally look up to meet his gaze. “Okay, I’ll do it.” 

��

It’s too easy to fall back into step with Dick. He always greets you with a smile, brings you snacks before practice (homemade ones at that), and carries your bag to your car for you, even though you insist that you’re more than capable of doing it yourself. He’s certainly trying, but the more effort he puts in, the more you can’t help but resent him. 

His kindness is all just a means to an end for him. He’s buttering you up so your movements are less goddamn stiff when you’re next to him, so you at least vaguely resemble an evenly matched pair. You know from Brian that he’s only coming back because of a stupid bet he made with his brother. He’s just here to prove he can make it to the Olympics. Your childhood dream, what you’ve decided would be the sign that you’ve made it—to him, it’s just another achievement he can use to inflate his ego. The worst part about it is he’s good enough that he could genuinely make it happen that effortlessly. And once he’s satisfied with that, he’ll waltz out of your life just as quickly as he came in. 

So when he offers you a hand as you step out of the rink, when he happens to have an extra energy drink, when he suggests a “team bonding” dinner, you don’t accept. You’ll let yourself entertain him on the ice for the sake of the skate. But nothing more. 

At the very least, you can admit that your performance aspect has definitely improved since skating alongside Dick. You breeze through Eastern Regionals, then Skate Canada, then Skate America, and in no time at all, you’re at the Grand Prix Final: the one barrier you’ve always hit. 

The short goes even better than you imagined it would. Too good. You’ve seen the posts that the fans have made about the two of you, digging up old skating clips to support their theories about the two of you. There’s a poorly worded interview by Brian that does nothing but fuel the flames, and even some of the commentators have been talking about how good the two of you look together. All signs seem to be telling you that you have nothing to worry about; the two of you are perfect. They don’t understand that that’s exactly what you’re worried about. 

You don’t catch yourself until it’s too late. You’re slowly getting consumed by him—by his soft smiles and whispers of encouragement and stupid, stupid puns. You’re back where you started, feeling weightless as the two of you skate your free program, actually losing yourself to the music. There’s nothing to prove anymore; this isn’t a performance—this is just how it’s always meant to be. It should feel right. But it doesn’t, because you’re terrified that if you let yourself get comfortable in his embrace, you won’t be able to skate like this ever again.

You pop the triple Lutz. Then you go into an Euler and a double toe loop that’s under-rotated too. You don’t understand, your jumps have always been pristine, especially your doubles. You haven’t made a sloppy mistake like this in a while. The last time was when–

Shit, you’re too early into the step sequence, the turn too sharp at the corner. You meet his gaze repentantly, like that will absolve you of your guilt. You don’t know what emotion you’re expecting to find in eyes. Maybe anger? Frustration? That’s certainly how you feel at the moment. Whatever it is, it’s certainly not adoration. 

You want to ask him what the hell is going on, but there’s no time. Last move. Death spiral. You have to hold hands, and the contact makes your skin burn. You don’t have the heart to look at him again. You’re afraid of what you’re going to find.

Suddenly everything feels too tight: the rink, your chest, the skates around your feet. You have to get out of there. One revolution, two, three, four. You can hold on, it’s almost over. Another four. He pulls you back towards him. It’s your final pose. The two of you are chest to chest. 

You just have to hold this for a second, and then you’re free. You can do it. You can do it. And then he’s leaning in even closer, until his forehead is pressed against yours and your lips hovering over each other. 

You can’t do it anymore and all you can think about is how to get out of there. You don’t even bother to wait for your score; you’ll deal with Brian’s scolding later. But you know if you stay out there any longer, you won’t be able to scrape together what little sanity you still have left. 

You’re leaving. You have to leave.

And as you run back to the lockers, you realize somebody’s been calling out your name.

“Hey, wait! Is everything okay?” Of course, the one person you don’t want to see would follow you. “Why did you leave like that? Did I do something wrong?” His hand hovers over your arm for a moment before he pulls it away and you don’t know whether you should laugh or cry. He used to do it with practiced ease back when you were kids, when you would joke that he had cooties but let him do so all the same. Now, you’re not sure if you can stand his touch, and from the look on his face, it seems to break his heart.

”Nothing, let’s just forget about this.” You feel like you’re being strangled and it takes all of your energy not to burst into tears at the moment. 

”No,” he says softly. “No, I know you, I know you’re not okay. Please, let’s talk about this.” 

And suddenly, everything’s just too much. He’s acting too nice to you, like he actually cares. Like maybe the fervent glances and lingering touches on the ice mean more to him than just pandering to the judges. But you know he doesn’t, because then he wouldn’t have left.

You let out a bitter laugh, shaking your head. “No, you don’t know a single thing about me. So don’t act like you care about me now.”

”I do though!” 

“Bullshit. We’re not anything to each other.” 

His face crumples immediately. He takes a step back. This is the closest he’s ever been to tears.

On a kinder day, you’d take it all back. You’d apologize and beg for his forgiveness and he would be disgustingly kind like he always is and you could both forget about this. But you’re tired of dancing around the issue and you think there’s a sick part of you that revels in his pained expression. 

You take a step forward. “You’re just a coworker. This? This act where we pretend like we can stand to be in the same room as each other? This isn’t real. So stop acting like it is. You didn’t care about me when you left. So why the change now? Do you know how fucking hard it was for me to move on? I couldn’t even skate afterwards. I thought my career was over. And I’ve had to fight every single day to prove that—that I’m still a capable skater, that I have a place in this sport.” 

Your voice trembles, and it takes all of your strength to swallow the lump in your throat. “I had to fight to be able to skate without you. To have the courage to stand on the ice alone. So I’m sorry that I’m not willing to welcome you back with open arms, because I know this is just some stupid game to you. You’ll get to the Olympics, because of course you will, and I’ll get to ride on the coattails of that. And that will be the greatest moment of my career, but to you, it’s just another thing on your checklist. Then you’ll go back to whatever you decided is more worthy than m–” You choke on your own words. “Than skating. And I’ll have to pick up the broken pieces again. But frankly speaking, I don’t know if I can do that a second time.”

It’s dead silent, save for your panting. You feel like you just ran a marathon. And Dick? You can’t read him, and that’s what scares you the most.

”Forget it.” The silence is driving you insane, and you just start running your mouth. “Fuck, forget it. I should just be grateful you’re even my partner this season. It’s the only way I’ll make it to the Olympics. I know you’re thinking it, you and Brian—”

“Don’t say that.”

“—that’s why you left, isn’t it? Didn’t want to be tied down to a pathetic fucking loser.”

“I never said th—”

”I can’t blame you. I’d leave me too—“

“I DIDN’T LEAVE YOU!” 

Now you’re both silent. You’ve never heard him raise before. You’ve never seen him this desperate either. He’s shaking as he stands in front of you. “You’re right, I didn’t care about skating. It was always just a hobby to me. But I stayed because of you. Because I was young and stupid and in love and the only way I knew how to show you that was to skate with you. And it killed me when I had to quit, but I just…I saw how much passion you had for skating. Like it was the air you needed to breathe, but I knew I couldn’t dedicate myself to the sport like you could.. And you deserved a partner who would love skating as much as you do.”

You think your brain short circuits after “in love,” and if he says anything else after that, you certainly aren’t processing it. “…You loved me?”

Dick laughs like you’ve just asked if water is a liquid. ”Of course I did. Everybody knew it too. Brian used to tease me about the way I would look at you. And I figured I would finally tell you after I quit, in case it would make things awkward, but then…”

“I blocked you.” You whisper in horror. 

“Yeah, so I figured you didn’t want anything to do with me after that. I didn’t realize quitting meant I would lose you too.” 

And suddenly you’re 14 again, watching the boy you’ve had a crush on for over half of your life tell you that he doesn’t want to skate anymore, and you feel so small and so stupid. “Oh god. So all of those years…”

He nods, “I lied about the Olympics thing. Or well, I really did have a bet with Jason, but when Brian told me that you needed a new partner…I came back hoping it would be a chance to make it up to you.”

You’re still having a hard time wrapping your head around the fact that maybe Dick had genuinely been trying to make amends with you. “So you being nice wasn’t just for show or team-building or whatever?”

“Team-building? God, I don’t think there’s a world where I can love you in any other way.”

The first realization that he had loved you in the past had been enough to nearly give you a heart attack. But to hear love? In the present tense? You think back to how he’s been acting for the past few months. All of the weird incidents that you can’t just explain away by saying that he’s making fun of you or being civil to you as a teammate or just being nice because that’s how he is. 

Because there’s no other explanation for why he looks at you like you hung the stars in the sky, why he lifts you with a reverence that could rival the likes of Keats and Byron, why he lingers on the ice after every practice, like he’s chasing the last vestiges of your warmth. 

And you have so many words dancing on the tip of your tongue, ways in which you can lay down your heart for him as he has done for you. But both of you know that even this stolen moment is just that: stolen time.

”Shall we go back?” He offers you his hand evenly, but there’s a tremble in his voice that gives him away. Like he’s worried that even after all of this, there was a universe in which you still don’t reciprocate his feelings. 

Your heart is screaming at you to assure him, promise that yes of course, you would accept him. But the words evaporate from your mind before you have a chance to grasp onto them. So you hope that at the very least, your actions can convey a fraction of your feelings. Hand in hand, you make your way back to the rink. No matter what the result is, you think it’ll be alright if you have Dick’s shoulder to cry on after this is all over. 

—

“And with a free score of 129.44 and a final score of 205.57, that puts America’s own duo from Gotham at third place in the Grand Prix Final!” 

Third, the word echoes in your head, taking you a few moments to process. Third, and there were no other American teams on the podium. Sure, it isn’t exactly the most fairytale ending, but it’s better this way—more real. You turn to look at Dick, who you’re sure has the exact same look of astonishment that you do. You remember Brian doing the math before you guys had even made it to the venue. Based on this event and the rest of your results this season, it was clear that the two of you were the uncontested pair in the whole country. 

“You’re going to the Olympics!” Brian whoops, hugging the both of you and jumping for joy in a way you think only he can get away with. You’re grinning so hard your muscles are starting to twitch but honestly you could care less about that. All of the training, all of the sleepless nights had finally paid off, and you felt like you had really, truly made it. And the fact that you did it with Dick makes it all the sweeter to you. 

You got a medal, a boyfriend, and that day, the kiss and cry finally lived up to its name.

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[deerlino]

DENYING THE OBVIOUS

— “i'm not falling in love,” he says, while he's actually falling the hardest. minho's in such deep denial, it's like he's drowning in the nile.

words ༯ 0.8k / pairing ༯ lee minho x gn!reader / tags ༯ best friends to lovers (kinda), childhood friends, mutual pining, fluff, humor, teasing & banter, arcade games, unspoken feelings, slice of life / content warnings ༯ fluff and more fluff !

a/n ༯ eh, this one's not my top-notch work, had a few bumps and hiccups, but hey, it's alright. took me ages to write tho. 😭 wanted to really nail that denial part, but i guess it's decent enough. hope you still got a kick out of it ! <3

“I’m not falling in love,” he says.

You stare at Minho, half-smirking, half-annoyed. He’s sprawled out on your bed, flipping through one of your old comic books, pretending he’s way cooler than he actually is. His hair is a mess—he’s too lazy to even run a hand through it properly. You roll your eyes.

“Sure, Minho. Whatever helps you sleep at night,” you say, tossing a pillow at his face. He barely dodges it, laughing. It’s that laugh that makes your heart skip a beat, but you refuse to admit it.

“Why would I be falling for you?” he teases, grinning. “You’re like... my best friend. And you’re a pain in the ass.”

You snort. “Right back at you, loser.”

He sits up, crossing his legs and leaning forward. “Let’s be real. If anyone’s falling, it’s definitely not me. I’m the epitome of self-control.”

You can’t help but laugh at that. “Yeah, right. You cried watching Toy Story 3.”

“Hey, that was emotional!” he protests, eyes wide in mock offense. “Andy grew up, okay? It’s relatable.”

“Sure, sure,” you say, shaking your head. You grab your phone and plop down beside him, scrolling through your messages. He leans over, way too close, trying to peek at your screen.

“Who’s texting you?” he asks, curious.

You nudge him away. “Nosy much? It’s just my mom.”

“Tell her I say hi,” he says, leaning back on his elbows.

You do, and your mom’s quick reply makes you giggle. “Tell Minho he’s still grounded for breaking my favorite vase last year.”

“Mom says you’re still grounded,” you say, showing him the message. He laughs again, this time falling back onto the bed, clutching his stomach.

“Man, your mom’s got a long memory.”

“Yup,” you agree. “So, Mr. Epitome of Self-Control, what’s the plan for today?”

He sits up, his eyes sparkling with that mischievous glint you know all too well. “Let’s go to the arcade. I bet I can beat your high score on Dance Dance Revolution.”

“You wish!” you exclaim, jumping up. “You couldn’t beat me if your life depended on it.”

As you both head out, the playful banter continues. At the arcade, it’s as if the rest of the world doesn’t exist. It’s just you, Minho, and the flashing lights of the game machines. You watch as he concentrates intensely on the dance mat, his tongue sticking out slightly. You can’t help but think he looks kinda cute like that. Not that you’d ever tell him.

“Ha! Beat that!” he shouts, pointing at his score. It’s higher than yours by a mere point. You roll your eyes.

“Beginner’s luck,” you mutter, stepping up to the mat. He watches you, that goofy grin still plastered on his face. You nail the moves, one by one, beating his score by a landslide.

“Told ya,” you say, smugly.

He pouts, crossing his arms. “Okay, okay. You win this time. But next time, you’re going down.”

As you both leave the arcade, he drapes an arm around your shoulders, pulling you close. It’s a casual gesture, something he’s done a thousand times before, but tonight, it feels different. Warmer. More... significant.

“Hey, you hungry?” he asks, steering you towards the diner down the street. It’s your usual spot, a place that holds countless memories. As you slide into your favorite booth, Minho immediately starts teasing the waitress, who’s known you both since you were kids.

“Two milkshakes, please. Extra whipped cream for her because she’s extra,” he says, winking at you.

You stick your tongue out at him. “And fries. Don’t forget the fries.”

When the food arrives, you both dig in, talking about everything and nothing. It’s easy, comfortable. But there’s an undercurrent of something more. Something unspoken.

“Do you ever think about the future?” he asks suddenly, looking at you with those deep, thoughtful eyes.

You pause, a fry halfway to your mouth. “Sometimes. Why?”

He shrugs, looking away. “I dunno. Just wondering what it’ll be like. If we’ll still be... like this.”

“Like what?” you ask, genuinely curious.

He fiddles with his straw, avoiding your gaze. “You know. Best friends. Hanging out all the time.”

“Of course,” you say, nudging his foot under the table. “Why wouldn’t we be?”

He finally looks at you, a soft smile on his lips. “Yeah. You’re right.”

You both finish your food, and as you walk home, the silence between you is comfortable. His hand brushes against yours a few times, and each time, your heart skips a beat.

Back at your house, you sit on the porch, watching the stars. Minho leans back, propping himself up on his elbows, looking up at the sky.

“Thanks for tonight,” he says quietly.

You glance at him, surprised. “For what?”

He shrugs, not meeting your eyes. “Just... for being you.”

Your heart flutters, and you find yourself smiling. “Anytime, Minho. Anytime.”

He looks at you then, really looks at you, and for a moment, it’s as if the world stands still. Then he breaks the gaze, looking embarrassed.

“Okay, seriously, I’m not falling in love,” he insists again, more to himself than to you.

You laugh, shaking your head. “Keep telling yourself that, idiot.”

But as you both sit there, the night wrapping around you like a warm blanket, you know the truth. And maybe, just maybe, he does too.

© deerlino (est. 040624) ༯ heyo, did you enjoy this piece? if you did, maybe you could reblog, drop a comment, or shoot me an ask to let me know your thoughts. also, feel free to check out my other stuff! thanks a bunch for the support! <3

[zepskies]

Every Second Counts - Part 2

Pairing: Russell Shaw x F. Reader

Summary: One date with your best friend’s brother leaves you wanting more, even though his questionable job and vagabond lifestyle make you want to guard your heart. When your brother falls into trouble, however, Russell is the one you trust to help you find him. 

AN: I decided to put this chapter out a bit early due to some Father's Day stuff tomorrow. I was blown away by the response from you guys on Part 1!! Thank you so much. 🥰 I had some trepidation writing a new character, but I'm so glad you guys seem to enjoy where this little series is going so far. It makes me even more excited to bring you the next chapter of ESC! 💜

Song Inspo: “Too Late” by The Paper Kites

Word Count: 5.3K

Tags/Warnings: Shaw family feels, a bit of mystery, tinge of fluff and mutual pining, and a twist…

💜 Series Masterlist

Part 2: “Family Reunion”

The next day after he left, you finally managed to get Charlie on the phone. He implored you not to try and find him.

He claimed he was staying with a friend for now, and was picking up some odd jobs through a connection at the museum—another security guard who knew how to get extra work. 

“What kind of extra work?” you asked. You sunk back into the couch in your living room and held a hand to your aching head. You had already lost sleep over this, worrying about where he was and what the hell he was doing.

“It’s better that you don’t know,” Charlie said.

He really knew how to frustrate you to the nth degree.

“Charlie, just come home. Please,” you said. Tears burned in your eyes, choking your words. “I’m sorry for what I said, okay? We’ll figure this out together, I promise.”

You heard him sigh.

“You had a right to be mad,” he said. “I’m the big brother, remember? But I’m…I’m a fucking mess. You shouldn’t have to take care of me.”

“We take care of each other, and you know that,” you said sharply, wiping at your eyes in frustration.

“Listen, I’ll come home when I can, okay? Be good.”

“Charlie! Ch—” The call ended, and you nearly tossed your phone in aggravation.

“That stubborn fucking idiot,” you muttered.

Four months later, your worry was eating you alive.

Charlie refused to come home or tell you where he was staying. The only time you got to see him was when you visited him on his night shift at the museum. You tried to talk him into coming home, but your brother remained stubborn.

“You get that from Dad,” you’d told him once, while watching him eat some leftover meatloaf you’d made for him. The two of you stood outside the museum on his break.

Charlie had smirked at you. “Yeah, well, you share the disease.”

You’d rolled your eyes at that.

But just when you thought you were starting to get through to him, now, he’d stopped answering your calls. For that matter, the museum hadn’t even seen or heard from him in a week or so.

So here you sat, in the living room of Dory’s apartment, crying into a jar of Nutella that you’d long ago stopped spreading over the strawberries she’d laid out. You had a chocolate-covered butterknife in one hand and a used Kleenex in the other.

Dory was sat next to you on the couch, rubbing your back with sympathy and concern in her own eyes.

“You should call the police,” she advised.

You’d thought of that, but if Charlie was doing something he wasn’t supposed to, then depending on what it was, you didn’t want necessarily want him locked up in a cell. He wasn’t a bad person, he was just…lost. You wanted him to get help.

You set down the butterknife beside the jar and turned to her, after drying your eyes the best you could.

“Do you think your brother would be willing to come back to Wyoming?” you said. After a beat of hesitation, you specified:

“Colter, the tracker.”

You hadn’t had a chance to meet him when he dropped in a couple of months ago, but she’d told you about his brief visit to find a graduate student who had been kidnapped, and nearly killed by a professor in the Sciences department for uncovering a flaw in the man’s research. That flaw would have costed him his entire grant, and possibly his career and reputation. 

The terrible incident had caused an uproar on campus. Students were released from their classes for an entire day after the professor was arrested. 

Now, Dory considered your question with a thoughtful nod. “I’ll call him.”

You were grateful, but your face became pained as something occurred to you. You held up a hand.

“Wait, I just realized I can’t pay him,” you said. You didn’t have more than a thousand dollars in your savings account, and that was for emergencies. Like the time Charlie nearly burned the house down after a lighting mishap with his bong.

“Oh, sweetie, don’t worry about that,” Dory said. She laid a comforting hand on your arm. “He’d do this as a favor to me.”

“I don’t know,” you replied, your brows furrowing. “That’s a pretty big favor.”

She’d told you what some of Colter’s fees could run up to, but she tried to quell your reservations and promised to call him regardless.

However, the more you thought about it, you already had a phone number in your cell…for the one person who would understand the part of your brother that you might never be able to. 

After you left Dory’s apartment, you debated the idea in your head for the entire drive home. 

And when you got to the house, you picked up your cell, and you called him. Your nerves had you pacing back and forth across the living room as it rang. 

“Hey, sweetheart.”

You couldn’t help smiling just at the sound of his voice, smooth and pleased, and a hint surprised.

“Hey,” you replied, biting your lip. “How are you?”

“I’m good. You’ve got good timing too. I just came off a job,” he said.

“Oh really? Where are you?”

“Well, I’m states-side now. Just got back from South America.”

“Oh, wow,” you said, blinking incredulously.

What the hell was he doing there? you had to wonder. Maybe he was protecting some Latin American emissary. Or maybe, he was doing things you didn’t want to think about. Your brother had filled you in a bit about civilian contract jobs in recent weeks, as he’d considered going after those himself.

“They can pay very well, from what I hear,” Charlie had said. “The problem with that is, it kind of defeats the purpose of leaving the military.”

Despite that mildly troubling thought, you tried to focus on the fact that you had this man on the phone at all.

A smile formed across your lips. “Did you get yourself a nice tan?”

“Eh, not really. Was more of a night job,” he said. “But uh…how are you doing? Not gonna lie, I’m surprised to hear from you.”

“Yeah, I’m…I’m not all that good, if I’m honest,” you said.

“What’s wrong?” he asked. You heard the concern in his voice. You steeled yourself before you answered.

“Russell, I’m sorry, but I need to ask you for a big favor.”

“Hmm, this sounds serious,” he said.

“Yeah, it is,” you agreed. When you next took a breath, it came out unsteady. “My brother’s missing.”

It was a bright Saturday morning when you welcomed Russell Shaw into your house. He looked around, finding family pictures, bookshelves, paintings, candles, all things that began to shade in who you were in the comfort of your home.

“It’s nice,” he said. “It’s uh, homey.”

You smiled and closed the door behind him.

“Well, it’s the house we grew up in,” you replied.

You and Charlie had of course inherited it after your parents’ passing. Their life insurance policies had helped pay off the three-bedroom house while you two were still in school. Your grandparents helped a lot back then too, and had even moved in for a time. Now they each had plots beside your parents at Grandview Cemetery.

“You want some coffee? I know you had a long drive,” you asked.

“Sure,” Russell agreed. He followed you to the kitchen, where you put on the coffee pot. You made a discreet glance at him. He looked virtually the same, with that familiar green jacket, jeans, boots, and a Jimi Hendrix shirt. You'd had a feeling he was a classic rock guy.

“Look, not that I wasn’t glad to get your call,” Russell said, “but you do know that I’m not the tracker in the family, right?”

“Dory did offer to call Colter, but I can’t afford to pay him,” you said.

“I could help with that,” said Russell. You raised up a hand to stop him there.

“I don’t want that kind of help from you,” you said firmly. “I didn’t call you for money, Russell. I called you because you’ll probably understand where Charlie’s head’s at. Better than me, anyway.”

He hesitated, but nodded in understanding. When the coffeemaker dinged, finished percolating, you turned to make him a mug with cream and sugar, as per his request.

While he waited for the coffee to cool, he admired you for a moment. Even in a plain V-neck shirt and a pair of jeans, your hair swung up in a ponytail, you were still a sight. (Your lipstick did match your shirt though. That made him smile.)

And Russell could admit, it was good to see you again.

“Me and Colter reconnected recently. Did Dory tell you?” he said.

Your brows raised high in surprise. “Oh yeah?”

The two of you found your way back to the living room with your mugs.

“Yeah. We talked for the first time in…shit, over twenty years,” Russell laughed, raking a hand through his hair.

Not only had he been able to say his piece to Colter about their…family issues, they’d also solved a case of their own, with Colter agreeing to help him find his friend Doug, who worked for the same black ops contract agency as Russell. The Horizon Group.

The aftermath of that still left Russell with a bitter taste in his mouth when he thought of how Horizon would’ve left Doug to rot, if it hadn’t been for him and Colter pressing their luck and digging deeper into who’d taken his friend.

That whole mess had also made Russell begin to wonder if maybe he needed a new line of work after all. But, because the money was just that good, he’d ended up on a new job by the end of the month.

Your voice soon broke him from his thoughts.

“I’m glad to hear that,” you said. You reached over and touched his arm, with warmth in your eyes. 

Russell gave you a smile. The closeness between you brought up memories of that dusty bar, and the taste of lime and tequila on your soft, supple lips. But you subtly cleared your throat and took your hand back. He hid a twinge of disappointment.

“So what’s going on with your brother?” Russell asked.

Get back on track, he reminded himself.

You sighed. “Damn Charlie.”

Over coffee, you explained that Charlie took off a few months ago, the night you got back from the bar. You had seen him only briefly, whenever you were able to catch him at the museum after work. He’d been keeping in touch with you on a weekly basis, but now, he hadn’t called in almost two weeks. You couldn’t get ahold of him on any of the numbers you had. They all seemed to be burner phones. Plus, he’d been let go from his job at the museum after not showing up for the past week. 

“What’s he into, extracurricular-wise?” Russell asked.

“I don’t know. He wouldn’t tell me,” you said in frustration. Tears prickled at your eyes, and your lower lip trembled. “He said it was safer that way.”

Russell laid a supportive hand over yours, earning your watery gaze.

“And you haven’t gone to the police?” he asked.

“I think he’s gotten into something…dangerous. I don’t want to get him in more trouble than he might be already,” you said. “I just want him to get help for his problems. Physically and mentally.”

Russell nodded. He understood that you wanted to protect your brother. Sometimes though, getting into “trouble” was the rock bottom someone needed in order to face their problems.

“Does he have friends?” he asked. “Some kinda crowd he hangs around with?”

“Not anymore. I think he’s lost touch with his Air Force buddies,” you said, though you tried to think. Your brows furrowed as something occurred to you. “He knew someone at work, at the museum. Another security guard on his same shift. After they cut his hours down to part-time, Charlie said the guy knew how to get extra work.”

“Okay, that’s definitely where we start,” said Russell. “Let me just give Dory a call. If I don’t let her know I’m in town, I don’t even wanna know the consequences.”

You laughed through your tears and tried to brush them away. 

“Yeah, do that. I wouldn’t want to get you in trouble.”

Russell took one look at you, and he tightened his hold on your hand.

“Hey,” he said.

You glanced up at him, as tears clung to your lashes. His heart couldn’t help but clench for you. He really didn’t like to see you like this.

“We’re gonna find him. You’ve got my word,” he said. 

You were desperate to believe him. So you nodded, sniffling as you tried and failed to keep yourself together. You were scared, for the first time in a long time. 

“All right, come ‘ere,” Russell said. When he guided you into his arms, you went willingly. You pressed your face into his chest to hide your weeping. His hold was warm and strong enough to make you feel secure. Just for this moment, you didn’t have to pretend you had everything handled.

“He’s the only family I have,” you reminded him. He nodded.

“I hear ya. We’ll get him home,” he said. “And I am going to call Colter. Don’t worry about the rest. I’ll square it up with him.”

“Russell—” you protested, but he just squeezed you playfully. 

“Don’t worry about it. I’ll pull big brother rank. He’s got no choice,” he joked. 

You shook your head, but you allowed him to comfort you for a bit longer. Because all too soon, you’d have to steel yourself again. You’d have to be the version of yourself that you always had to be, ever since you were fourteen years old.

You invited Dory over to your house, where the three of you were soon joined by the last of the Shaw siblings: the one you had yet to meet.

Colter made it in time for dinner that afternoon. The tall blonde took up your doorway with his broad shoulders and offered you a polite smile, along with his hand. 

“Hi, I’m Colter,” he said. 

You mentally tripped up a bit as you shook his hand and gave him your name. Did all the Shaw siblings have to be so damn attractive?

“Uh, yes, please come in.” You ushered him into your home and led him into the living room, where Russell stood from the couch. 

“Ahh, there he is,” Russell grinned, slapping his younger brother on the shoulder. 

“Here you are,” Colter gestured at him. “Where the hell did you take off to after last time?”

“Ah, you know. Argentina was fun.”

“I’m sure it was.”

You paused in the doorway, just watching the brothers in mystification. Dory shot you a questioning look as she came over from the kitchen. You met her with raised brows. 

“What?” Dory asked. A smile played on her lips.

“Do all of you have to be so unbelievably pretty?” you whispered over to her. Dory smirked and bumped your shoulder, nodding at Colter. 

“What, you wanna make out with him too?” she teased. 

Your mouth dropped open in disbelief. Dory just laughed and moved on to say hello to the other blonde. She pulled him down into a hug, and he reciprocated warmly.  

Russell then laid a hand on Colter’s shoulder, as well as Dory’s. He wore a big, proud grin.

“Hey. Look at us, huh?” he said. 

Dory sniffed as tears welled up in her eyes, looking up at both of her brothers. Colter wore a more reserved smile, but he did wrap an arm around his sister and thump his older brother on the back.

You smiled. You were lingering by the kitchen doorway. If nothing else, you were glad that this whole mess had been able to bring Dory back together with her family. 

You decided to give them a moment, and you wandered back into the kitchen. There you took a beat for yourself, mainly to breathe.  

When you again thought of Charlie, you had to wonder just what the hell he’d gotten himself into.

Later, the four of you sat in the living room so you could explain everything you knew so far to Colter. He took all the information in with a pensive expression that didn’t reveal much to you. 

“So you said he was struggling?” he said. 

“Yes, after he got out of the military,” you confessed. “He had a hard time figuring himself out. I got him the job at the museum, but I don’t think it was enough for him.”

“Why is that?” Colter asked. He saw that you were reluctant to explain. “I need to know the full picture of who Charlie is if I’m going to be able to figure out his probable moves.”

You sighed. “Well, he was seeing a VA psychiatrist for a while. They wanted to put him on antidepressants, but he stopped going. He…started self-medicating instead.”

That part was hard to admit, but it was the truth. You couldn’t pretend it wasn’t any longer. 

“What substances?” Colter asked. 

“Alcohol, mainly,” you replied. “At his worst, there were hard drugs, but I got him to tone it down just to weed every now and then.”

You bit at your thumbnail out of habit, but you forced yourself to stop, folding your hands in your lap. You didn’t see judgment in Colter’s eyes, just him taking in the information. You couldn’t help but glance at Dory, where you found her sympathy. She knew enough about what you’d been dealing with for the past few years. Russell seemed understanding as well. 

“Anything else I should know?” Colter asked. You shook your head. You felt bad about revealing Charlie’s business like this, but you knew it was the only way to help him. Still, you felt you had to defend him a little.

“Look, my brother has his problems, but he’s a good man,” you said. “He, um…he basically half raised me, after our parents died.”

Dory also knew this story. She rested a hand on your back, and you gave her what smile you could. 

“How old were you?” Russell asked. He earned your attention, and you met his sympathetic gaze.

“Fourteen,” you answered. “It was a car accident.”

He took that in, nodding slowly. “I’m sorry.”

The way he met your eyes when he said it, you believed him. You subtly cleared your throat and directed the conversation back.   

“So, I don’t have a lot of money. But I can give you something for your services,” you said to Colter. Both Russell and Dory met you with similar looks. 

“I’ve got it,” Dory says, before Russell had the chance. Colter waved her off though.

“In this case, it’s not necessary,” he said, focusing on you again. “So Charlie was working at the local museum?”

You breathed a note of relief at his generosity. Dory, Russell, and now Colter…they were all good people in their own way. You felt emotion rise in your throat.

“Yes, it’s about ten minutes away,” you managed to reply. “It’s closed now, but his coworker could be on shift. They always have security in place.”

You grabbed your purse to go with them when Colter and Russell stood, but the former raised a placating hand. 

“It’s best if you stayed here,” Colter said.

Your brows rose. “I don’t think so.”

Colter’s mouth parted, and he blinked, like he hadn’t expected you to push back quite like that; calm and matter of fact.

“Ah, well, it’s really for your safety—”

“I’m not going to sit and wait,” you said. “That’s all I’ve been doing for months. I may not be an expert tracker, or have been in the army, but I do know my brother. And we are going to find him.”

Behind you, Dory was giving Colter a warning shake of her head. She knew just how stubborn you could be. Meanwhile, Russell came up on your other side with a smile.

“What’s the harm in her coming along to the museum?” he said, sliding his brother a teasing look. “Unless the T. rex wakes up all the mummies, Ben Stiller style.”

You wanted to point out that that wasn’t exactly the plot of Night at the Museum, but you held it in with a smile. You gave Colter an expectant look.

He sighed at Russell’s antics, but he turned to you with a nod.

“Okay, let’s go,” he said. 

“I’ll head home then,” said Dory. “Call me if you need anything.” 

You gave her a hug after she gathered up her purse. 

“Thank you,” you whispered.

“It’s going to be okay,” she said, rubbing your back. “Colter’s the best.” 

“All right, fine. And what am I? Chopped liver?” Russell remarked, gesturing wide with his hands. You all filtered out of your house, and you locked the door behind you.  

“Oh, you’re special, all right,” Dory quipped back, but she gave her eldest brother a warm hug as well, then patted Colter on the arm before she left.

Russell shot Colter a playful smirk. “I got the hug.”

Colter rolled his eyes and pointed over to his big pickup truck. 

“Just get in the car, please.”

You had to smile at all their sibling teasing. It reminded you of how you and Charlie used to cut up, when things were good. On your way down the driveway, you hesitated by the Chevy Chevelle parked next to your own car. She was still black and sleek and beautiful.

You happened to glance up, and there was Russell, getting into his brother’s pickup. He winked at you across the driveway. You turned your face to hide your smile (and your blush) as you climbed into your car.

Colter noted the exchange when he buckled up into the driver’s seat. He watched Russell do the same on the passenger side, all while wearing a certain smile on his face. When he noticed how Colter was looking at him, his brows raised.

“What?” said Russell.

“What was that?” Colter asked.

“Nothing.”

“Yeah, right,” Colter chuckled. He began to pull the car out of the driveway after you in your car, so he could follow you. “What, do you two have a thing or something? Is that why she called you before me?”

Russell shrugged, but his smile was telling. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Mhmm. Convincing,” Colter said, but his lips tugged upward as well. His good humor diminished though, when he considered the last time he saw his brother. “How’s the arm?”

Russell gave a thumbs up with his left arm—the one that previously had a bullet run through it. It was still healing, even now.

“It’s good,” he said.

“Did you see a doctor?”

“Sure did.”

Riiiight. Another thing Colter wasn’t sure was the truth, but he’d give Russell that one.

“And that unfinished business?” Colter asked.

Russell’s smile faded, but he nodded. “Finished.”

After a moment, Colter nodded as well. 

“Okay,” he said. 

Something occured to him then. He paused, and he reached into his pocket. He held up a small, closed pocketknife with a wooden handle, and he gave it back to Russell. It had the man's name carved on the side.

Russell's smile returned as he flipped the old keepsake through his fingers.

"Thanks for keeping it safe for me," he said.

Colter smiled back. "Thanks for trusting me with it."

Colter parked next to you at the museum. It was closed, but the security guard, Jimmy, did know your brother. 

“I haven’t seen Charlie since he quit last week,” Jimmy claimed.

“He quit?” you said. “They told me he just never came back.”

“Yeah, well, same thing,” he said.

The front doors of the museum opened, and out came Dr. Feinman, your former boss, and the Head Manager. You left Jimmy’s questioning up to Russell and Colter with a meaningful look, and you went to intercept Feinman.

“Hi, sir, how’re you doing?” you asked. Your name fell from his lips in surprise. 

“My dear, it’s good to see you, but why are you here after hours?” he asked, his British accent lilting.

“I’m trying to find Charlie. He’s been missing, well, officially for about a week,” you said. “I was actually surprised to see you here so late.”

The man cleared his throat. He smoothed a hand over his tie and suit jacket.

“Yes, well, we could’ve used Charlie’s help. We’ve had to double our security efforts,” he said. “We’re currently dealing with a sensitive issue, so the museum will be closed until it is resolved.”

“You’re doubling your security efforts… Was something stolen?” you asked. 

Feinman clearly didn’t want to tell you this, but you knew you’d hit the nail on the head by the look on his face.

“Please, keep that information to yourself,” he said. 

“What was stolen?” you asked in concern. 

“I’m afraid I cannot disclose that information. Not even for you, dear,” he said. “I do hope you find your brother though.”

“Thank you. I appreciate that, and as a matter of fact,” you began, but Feinman waved an apologetic hand.

“I’m sorry, I’m afraid I’m in a terrible rush just now. But call my office tomorrow and Brenda will help you with whatever you may need,” he said. “Good evening.”

“Wait, Dr. Feinman,” you tried, but he was already breezing past you and heading toward his Mercedes in the parking lot.

Meanwhile, Colter and Russell weren’t having much better luck with Jimmy. 

“Look, I really don’t know where Charlie is,” he said. “Haven’t seen or heard from him since he took off.”

“He said you connected him with someone who could give him some work on the sly,” Russell said, leveling a hand at the man’s chest. “Who did you connect him with, and what kind of work are we talking?”

Jimmy blew out a breath, like this was really inconveniencing his day. (Or night, at this point.)

“What, you’ve got somewhere to be?” Colter said. “You’re getting paid to stand right here, and we have no problem sharing your shift all night. You might as well just tell us what we want to know.”

Jimmy rubbed the back of his neck in annoyance.

“All right,” he snapped. “I hooked him up with this guy I knew through a mutual acquaintance, who just needed some muscle. I guess you could call it private security.”

“A mutual acquaintance?” Colter repeated. 

“What’re you, James Bond? Who did you connect him with?” Russell pressed.

Jimmy was reluctant to talk. You came back over to join them, and the security guard became even more tight-lipped.

“You guys should go. I don’t have to talk to you, and I’ve got a job to do,” he said.

When he tried to continue his patrol around the museum, you stepped deliberately in his way. You didn’t have the patience for this, and you would no longer be a doormat, letting the Goldsteins and the Feinmans of this world push past you.

“Look, Jimmy, if you don’t give us something we can go on to find my brother, you know where I’m going to go?” you asked. But you spoke before he could respond. “To the police. And your name is the only one I have to give them. Now, if you don’t want that to be you, then give me a different name.”

Jimmy looked down at you, and then over at your intimidating shadows, Russell and Colter. Jimmy sighed.

“Eddie,” he gave, finally.

Russell raised his hands, as if to say, Is that it?

“What, Eddie Vedder? Eddie who? Come on,” Russell said.

“Eddie Mendez,” Jimmy replied in a lowered voice. “I don’t know where he lives. I don’t have his number. And that 'mutual acquaintance' is doing some time in lockup. But Eddie hangs out at a bar called Howley’s.”

You and Russell shared a meaningful look at that. You turned back to Jimmy. 

“Okay. What was stolen here at the museum?” you said. “That’s why it’s been closed, right?” 

“I don’t know,” Jimmy said. “I wasn’t on shift, and Dr. Feinman keeps a tight lid on that kind of thing.”

“We’ll need to get into his office then,” Colter said. 

You blinked wider at Colter. Wait, was he really suggesting you guys break into the museum?

Jimmy pointed to the black device attached to the ceiling above them. 

“See the cameras?” he said. “That's not happening on my dime.”

Colter looked up, and he saw the cameras strategically installed across the front of the museum. 

“Then take us where the cameras don’t see,” he said.

You, Colter, and Russell were able to break into the museum via a storage unit door, thanks to Jimmy’s texted instructions. You couldn’t believe you were actually doing this, but it was for Charlie, you reminded yourself.

You remembered where to find Feinman’s office. You paid for a lot of your undergrad expenses, namely your books and tuition, by working full-time as an office assistant here, and the occasional tour guide. 

You led them to the room where the inventory records were kept. Colter gave you his gloves so you didn’t leave prints, and you were able to pinpoint what was labelled as missing from the latest shipment. 

“Oh great,” you muttered. 

“What was taken?” Colter asked.

“A collection of Native American weapons. Dated almost eight hundred years old,” you said, shaking your head. “The collection is valued at $1.5 million dollars.”

Russell and Colter shared a look. 

“That’s some big motive,” Russell said. 

“When did they go missing?” Colter asked. 

“Almost two weeks ago,” you said. Your brows furrowed the more you read, as you realized something. “Just a few days before Charlie left the museum…” 

The timing wasn’t lost on anyone. But if Charlie was a suspect, Feinman hadn’t let on to that at all. You checked the exact date the artifacts went missing again: a Tuesday night. Charlie didn’t typically work on Mondays or Tuesdays, you realized. And he’d left after the artifacts went missing. So maybe they hadn’t thought to question him yet. One small blessing.  

You sighed. With that information gathered, the three of you put back everything you uncovered and left the building the same way you came in. Jimmy was nowhere in sight, probably patrolling the other end of the museum on purpose.

When you all made it back to the parking lot, you turned to Colter and Russell.

“Okay, what’s next?” you asked. “Howley’s right? To find Eddie.”

“Actually, I think it’s best Russell and I take it from here,” Colter said. “We don’t know what kind of character Eddie Mendez is, but from how reluctant Jimmy was to tell us, it doesn’t sound good.”

You opened your mouth to argue, but Russell drew closer and touched your arm. You could see in his face that he agreed with his brother, even though he hadn’t said anything yet.

“Look, you’ve been a huge help,” he said. “But let us work on this, okay? We’ll call you when we find something.”

Still, your lips pursed. “Russell, he’s my brother.”

“I know. Punching out drunks is one thing, but this might be a little different,” he said, grasping your arms gently. “Will you give me some peace of mind, knowing you’re home safe?”

He brushed one of his thumbs along your skin. Already you had goosebumps. From the cold chill on the air, or from him, you weren’t sure. But that simple touch, along with his earnest, imploring gaze broke you down.

“All right. I get it. I’m not the Special Ops guy,” you said. “But call me afterward so I know how it went.”

“Okay, will do,” Russell agreed. He let you go so you could go to your car. You shot the brothers one last look before you climbed in and peeled out of the parking lot.

Russell expelled a sigh of relief. He got into the passenger side of his brother’s pickup while Colter started it up.

Thanks to the late hour, and how little traffic there was on the road, it didn’t take you long to get home.

You’d debated whether you should just go to Howley’s anyway, but you didn’t want to get in the way, or make Russell worry for that matter. You smiled, despite yourself.

His touch had tingled across your arms, and whenever he absently laid a hand on the small of your back, supportive or guiding.

Thinking about him just made your heart ache. Because after this was over, he’d be gone again—on a new mysterious job, perhaps on the other side of the world.

You’d been regretting how you left things with him at the bar for months, but now you were glad you hadn’t gone any further with him that night. Your heart was too easily ensnared, it seemed, and Russell didn’t seem to be a “strings attached” kind of guy.

When you parked in front of your house, you let out a tense breath. Russell and Colter would find Charlie. You believed in them. You just hoped your brother was all right, wherever he was.

You pulled your cell out of your purse to call Dory as you headed for the front door. You wanted to give her an update and let her know that you were back at home.

The call began to ring just as you slipped your key into the lock. Unfortunately, you never got a chance to open it.

A strong pair of arms wrapped around you from behind and yanked you back, and a firm hand over your mouth smothered your scream.

AN: 🫣 *Whispers* Sorryyy. But hey! What did you think of the reader's reunion with Russell, as well as the little Shaw Family Reunion? Plus, we got a bit of the reader working with Russell and Colter on the case.

Now, the real timer starts...

Next Time:

You were led into what sounded like a warehouse. You couldn’t know for sure with this musty bag over your head and your wrists bound together with zip ties, but you clenched your teeth and tried to stop sniffling. Your fear made your heart pump fast and loud in your ears.

Voices echoed around you, arguing, yelling about shipments. You were shoved hard to the ground, and you gasped, instinctively throwing your hands out when your knees hit the hard cement. 

“No…” 

That voice was all too familiar. 

▶️ Keep Reading: PART 3

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[randomshyperson]

R U Mine? - Heart Shaped Series

Chapter Summary: A game of cat and mouse begins between an Avenger and a criminal. But perhaps there are no winners, as they both fall.

Warnings: mentions of typical canon violence, hints of abusive past and unhealthy work dynamics, some superhero routine lore, more shapeshifter power mentions, mutual pining, forbidden relationship, some teasing, (first) kiss and then a lot of kisses and steamy make out, some fluff and comedy. | Words: 6.965K

A/N-> How many references to Killing Eve can one put in a story. And also, references to the Witch's Road comics. This here is the extra chapter about their first kiss, enjoy reading.

General Masterlist | AO3 | Series Masterlist

-&-

Before.

"I know what you're doing."

Three weeks prior, Natasha's sentence would have made her jump with fright. Perhaps she would have tried to hide all those files and lie and lie again, until she could convince herself the whole thing was about the job.

But today? Wanda was tired. She had spent the last few hours stumbling into dead ends, no progress on whatever she was trying to do with all that vague information Shield had on you.

So she lifted her face to the redhead who appeared in her room late at night, two cups of coffee in hand, and chuckled weakly at the statement. It was obvious that the drink was an invitation - perhaps even a sign of 'hey, I'm not trying to start a fight. I want to help,' and Wanda accepted without hesitation.

"It's not like I'm doing a good job of keeping it a secret." She retorts to Nat, who smiles before taking the empty space on the bed. Practically all the Shield files - now labeled Avengers - about you are scattered on the mattress. It's a mess, and to Nat, it makes sense that Wanda hasn't made much progress.

"To be fair, for a first-time Investigation, I think you're doing all right." Says the widow after a sip of her coffee. "You covered your tracks and even used an official justification for researching her. Your mistake was involving Vision."

Wanda sighs. "Let me guess, he talks under pressure?"

Nat chuckles, nodding. Wanda rubs a tension point on her forehead. Taking advantage of this, Natasha gestures to one of the files. "I'm not going to tell you what you can and can't do, Maximoff. But this doesn't seem very healthy."

Wanda gives a sad smile, and Nat expects her to defend herself. But instead, the smaller girl sighs. "I know." She murmurs sincerely, forcing a faint smile at the widow. "But I need this, Nat. It's the first time in months that I've managed to think about anything other than Pietro. And I know it doesn't look healthy, but it's all I've got. I'm an Avenger now. Maybe it's just time to get to work, and arrest villains or something."

Natasha frowned at her, absorbing the confession for a moment before rebutting: "Is that what you want to do with Y/N, though? Lock her up?"

Wanda swallows dryly, looking down. "Of course, Nat."

"You're a terrible liar."

The brunette sighs. "I mean it!"

"And I don't believe you." Nat insists in a good mood despite everything. "Look at all this, Wanda. You've been at it for days. Studying her. Did you even remember to eat anything in the last few hours?" Wanda snorts, gesturing to the breakfast leftovers on the dresser in the corner of the room which makes Natasha let out an incredulous laugh. "Wow, a nutritious example you are."

The witch tosses her hair back. "If you've come here to try to babysit me, please leave."

Natasha rolled her eyes and ignored the other woman's stubbornness. She put her coffee down between her crossed legs and started organizing the files.

"You're naturally perceptive and clever, Maximoff. But you lack experience and practice. You need to put together a timeline and find the gaps." The widow began, and masterfully, all the security camera photos, reports from shield agents, and unexplained crimes related to thieves with no identifiable faces began to connect and make sense. "But I must warn you, I did all this years ago. When I started at Shield, your little friend was already some sort of the goose that laid the golden eggs, or stole the gold for the saying to work."

"She's not my friend." Wanda murmured, her gaze fixed on the files so Natasha wouldn't see her blush. The widow ignored the comment and continued talking.

"My point is that I didn't get very far." Nat says with a sigh. "To be honest, it was an insult to my ego. She was just a kid back there. And she managed to flee much more experienced agents. She had endless, untraceable disguises. She doesn't need to impersonate, you know? She can create faces. It makes her almost impossible to monitor. When we met for the first time, it was she who found me." Nat says, swallowing dryly at her own memories. Wanda's eyes widen softly, listening carefully. "I never told this to anyone, but when Clint first met me, he told me that he felt something. As if he knew I wanted to escape. And when I saw Y/N, I had the same feeling."

"What did you do?" Wanda asked and Nat sighed.

"I couldn't do what Clitn did for me, Wanda, I'm sorry." Said the widow sincerely. "She attacked first. And I had to defend myself. It wasn't just protocol, it was all I'd learned to do."

Wanda frowns. "Why are you telling me all this, Nat?"

The redhead sighs. "Because it's important. It means that she doesn't trust easily, and attacks when she feels threatened. She reminds me of both of us, to be honest." Nat comments, getting a small smile from the witch. "Besides, I want you to be really careful if you do dig into this."

"I will."

"I'm serious, Wanda." Insists the redhead. "Careful not to miss a gun hidden in her dress." She remembers the last official report Wanda made, regarding her first mission, the night she simply couldn't stop thinking about, especially after your secret vision to the compound, and the witch swallows dryly. Nat doesn't mind her hesitation. "Careful in a way that you'll use your powers if necessary."

Without looking the widow in the eye, Wanda retorts between her teeth: "I get it, Nat."

"You're not going to carry this on until you look me in the eye, Maximoff. And swear it."

Wanda's stubbornness falters, and she returns her attention to the widow, looking at her seriously. Nat gives her a small smile as she adds, "It's not just Clint who cares about your safety. We all do. I'm not going to allow you to throw yourself headlong into something dangerous just to escape your grief, Wanda. Swear that you'll be very careful, and you'll walk away if it gets too dangerous."

Wanda is surprised by the tenderness, and a little embarrassed. It takes a moment but she finally nods. "I swear." She says before adding. "I want to help Y/N. Like Clint helped you. Not lock her up, like I said before."

Natasha chuckles. "I know, kid. I know."

With the Black Widow’s blessing, she kept digging those files. And Nat didn't lie, you're untraceable. Every time you meet, it's clear that you've let yourself be found. Even with handcuffs on your wrist, you keep smiling as if it was all part of the plan. Judging by the way you always escape from prisons, later going public that some confidential information for the police was stolen, this is easily confirmed.

The Avengers are getting used to the strange persecution, very much because each of them has their secrets. And just like his protégé, Steve Rogers had side missions to pursue Bucky. It would be hypocritical of him to hold anything against Wanda for being after you.

And Wanda couldn't stop. Even after hundreds of dead ends and ridiculous escapes. She had to meet you, and have less than five minutes in your presence with another twelve agents and the whole Avengers present every fortnight when they manage to track you only for you to escape again. She didn't know why, but she had the impression that you looked forward to these moments as much as she did.

Like a little private game of mouse and cat, only you and her were part of.

-&-

There are a hundred things to do in the Capital of Crime.

The most complete list of gambling games imaginable, right down to a mural of targets to be captured.

All these things are at your disposal, and all you can think about is the new addition to the Avengers team.

Wanda Maximoff was born in the country that fell from the sky around the same time that Baron Strucker was playing Pinky and the Brain with your cells in a secret laboratory of the now-destroyed Hydra. A Stark bomb made her an orphan, and after bouncing from orphanage to orphanage, often expelled for getting into trouble with her twin brother, Wanda embarked on protest groups in search of civil rights until she was finally recruited into a human experimentation program that turned her into an enhanced version of herself. She was the only reason for the first time in your life that you wished you hadn't split with Strucker so soon - If you'd still been his puppy instead of the clients he got, you would have met her. You may have become friends.

"She's doing it again." Xu Xialing whispered to Layla, the two engaged in a game of Beat the Hero - a competition of colored cards that contained electronic figures detailing the abilities of real-life superheroes. It was, in a way, training for possible battles in real life, where they learned about their enemies by playing. The two of them were sitting in opposite armchairs, while you were practically lying on the sofa, drinking with a lost look on your face. According to them, fantasizing for the tenth time in a row about the Avenger you met in Italia weeks ago.

Layla giggled when she saw your expression before turning her face to Xu Xialing again. "You know, they say Maximoff has psychic powers. Maybe Y/N is under a spell."

"A love spell, that is." Mocks the Chinese woman, getting a laugh from the other.

You only came out of your trance of thoughts about Wanda with the bell from the private room you were in. Your face changed before the curtain opened, and Xu Xialing was the first to look at the security guard entering, somewhat annoyed at having her private time playing games with friends interrupted.

"Forgive me for intruding, madam. The Countess is here and requests the Sage to join her." The man said, and Xialing nodded in understanding. She turned to you, but there was no need. With a soft leap from the sofa, you got to your feet and took one of Layla's cards from her pile - you threw it on the board and helped her win the game, taking the opportunity to leave the room while the two of them discussed whether the assisted victory had been fair or not.

The Golden Daggers Club was as packed and vibrant as ever. The next round of betting for the fights was due to start soon, and there were a lot of people shouting their bets to the judges, and joining the fight cages, so you had to make some effort to follow the venue's security guard into the special area of the place - where federal agents were given even more privacy to be around.

Contessa Valentina Allegra de la Fontaine was waiting for you alone, but behind a door with six security guards guarding her. Each of them gave you a look of contempt, but you walked past them without any reaction until you were with Valentina in a room with no windows, every inch of which was covered in priceless works of art, many of them stolen throughout history, which you and Layla recovered together in the service of the Ten Rings.

"You wanted to see me, Countess?" was your greeting, softly snarky. You weren't in the best of moods, especially since Valentina had interrupted your rest.

The woman gave you a false smile from the armchair where she was sitting waiting for you. A closed file and a glass of wine lay on the corner table.

"Oh, what a surprise, after your last defeat, I thought you'd given up on Sage." She comments with a certain venom on your disguise, the same one you wore two weeks ago when you went on what she called a streak of bad luck in the Club's fighting competitions, but which Xu Xialing called a distracted lovesick puppy. You try to disguise your clumsiness by clearing your throat.

Checking that the door is closed, you return to your real appearance and Valentina gives you a small but genuine smile.

"What do you want?" you insist, and in response, she pats the file resting on the table. You sigh. "What's this?"

"Last month has been very busy, but I've finally had time to review some of your late missions reports." She begins and you hide your nervousness, knowing full well where this conversation could end. "I apologize for taking so long to check them, darling. I hope you don’t think I’m jeopardizing your learning progress."

"Stop stalling, Valentina, just tell me what the problem is." You retort grumpily but she chuckles, her fingers tracing the paper before she grabs the file.

“Normally, I trust your experience, but I've heard that you've been particularly... antsy in your last few operations. Of course, you've successfully made it out of all of them, after all, we're having this conversation, but for a master of disguise, the increased number of encounters with the Avengers attracted my curiosity. I thought I'd take a closer look at your original encounters with them, and found an interesting passage in your report on Italy two months ago."

The page is already marked and in the next moment, she begins to read;

"My exit was interrupted by the presence of a new Avenger. A woman, perhaps the same age as me. The new, improved one from Sokovia. Average height, brown hair. Green eyes. Intense. Hypnotizing."

You swallow dryly, looking down at your feet. You're grateful to have control over your own body, or Valentina would be able to watch your cheeks blush.

She continues reading. "We faced each other briefly. The girl doesn't have complete control of her abilities, it was a quick fight. I immobilized her and departed in the getaway vehicle. No disguise was compromised, no other witnesses." Valentina narrates, finally raising her eyes from the file to you. "You know what's funny, sweetheart? The Avengers submitted their own report on Sapienza, and Wanda Maximoff describes the encounter with a Shapeshifter in detail. My question is, why are you lying for someone who didn't hesitate to use her special abilities to show her team your real appearance?"

You're caught off guard. A conflict of emotions rises in your chest, from anger to disappointment. It hurts. It's confusing and suffocating, and you feel the urge to start crying. But none of these emotions floats over your expression, your nails digging into your palm are enough to keep everything well buried.

With a soft sigh, you look Valentina in the eye.

"I don't trust the CIA."

Your boss chuckles, closing the file and crossing her legs. It's not exactly her best lie, but it seems to work on her.

"If this is about the Hydra clean-up in the public sector, I can assure you that we're safe." Valentina says. "Besides, your job is to trust me, Y/N. Not the CIA, or the Ten Rings, or any of your contractors. Only me, dear child, must you trust."

You bite your tongue hard, tears almost escaping this time. 

"I just..." You try, not knowing exactly what to say. "There was a conflict, and the girl, she beat me. Effortlessly. That energy she possesses revealed my disguise immediately, I had no chance to try another one. So I made a choice, and I omitted the part that I thought would do me any harm. Isn't that what you taught me to do?"

Right answer. Valentina grins, before sighing and standing up. You don't want her to touch you, but she puts her hands on your arms and you resist the urge to pull away.

"I'm proud of you, you're getting cleverer every day. I want you to be this way, Y/N. Strong-willed, resourceful." She compliments you, her hands moving up to your cheeks. You try to smile, but Valentina squeezes your skin tighter. "That doesn't mean you will lie to me. Understand?" She asks but doesn't expect a vocal response. Your nod is more than enough for her to give you a fake smile and loosen her grip. "You're my most valuable employee. I don't want you to put yourself in vulnerable situations without a reason."

Valentina steps away, and you decide to take a chance.

"She's like me." It's more hesitant than you'd like, but it's enough to make your boss raise an eyebrow at you. Swallowing dryly, you continue. "Wanda and her brother were also Strucker's experiments. We are the same. I thought I could-"

Valentina interrupts with a spiteful chuckle that makes you cringe like a frightened child. "The same? Is that what you think?" She retorts in a mocking tone that makes you feel too ashamed to even broach the subject. Leaning her waist on the table, she looks at you. "I know you've been digging through my files on her, Y/N. I don't blame you for being curious, but by now, I imagine you know very well the conditions of the experiments Miss Maximoff was part of. How she volunteered for all that. How can you say you're the same?"

You hesitate uneasily. "I don't mind that she volunteered. War called for desperate measures. I just... I've never met any other of us. Another who survived the Baron. I've been thinking if I could just see her-"

Valentina bursts into laughter, and you fall silent, concentrating so that she can't see your red ears. "See her? Now what's that, huh? Romeo and Juliet of the supers? What an absurd idea, child!" Refutes your boss, still chuckling as she walks away to the table. She finishes her glass of wine in one long gulp, and to your surprise, throws the file in your direction. You catch the item flat against your chest. "The notes the Avengers made about you are on page 24. Read what she said about you, and draw your own conclusions about who you call an equal. I came here to confirm your mental state, and this conversation was enlightening. I'll arrange an assessment."

"Val-"

"It’s not open for discussions Y/N." She cuts you off, a car key already in hand that makes you groan to yourself impatiently. "You're not going back to work until you talk to Doctor Grand."

She leaves without saying another word and you're left alone with the file in your hands. Without hurrying, you flip to the page mentioned earlier and sigh when you find a photograph of Wanda wearing a uniform with the Avengers crest embroidered on it. Below is her statement about the mission.

You trace your fingers over the passage "An extraordinary and dangerous skill from an equally impressive fighter" but hesitate when you read the passages about how she felt scared and unsafe. About how she thought you were aiming at her. About how she felt she failed by not bringing a high-risk criminal into custody.

Your tears finally fall, staining the page before you quickly wipe them away, closing the file tightly after ripping Wanda's photo out.

It was time to wrap up loose ends and get back to your perfect record.

-&-

In the fake drawer hidden on the floor under your bed - safeguards for someone whose apartment is frequently visited by a two-faced countess - you kept some personal things. Hydra's last record of you, small souvenirs from missions, and a photograph of Wanda Maximoff.

And this morning - and any other morning really - you were supposed to ignore that drawer, leave any weapons at home, put on a presentable outfit, and meet Valentina in the lobby promptly at 10 o'clock. She would take you by car to Dr. Grant's office who would do a standard assessment of your mental state that would tell whether or not you were fit to return to work.

But instead, you took the photo of Wanda out of its hiding place and put it in your pocket. You stood up, walked through your closet, and chose the least flashy backpack you owned. Then you armed yourself with three different types of knives and two pistols in a chest holster, very similar to that of American detectives. And speaking of the police, your drawer of false documentation provided by Valentina was studied without haste until you had in your pockets the identity of a Shield agent who never existed but was meant to be a little tribute to the job you were performing today.

With your disguise ready, you left the apartment two hours before your scheduled meeting with Valentina, and you had barely boarded the ferry when she called you.

"Our appointments aren't something to be skipped, young lady." Stated the woman seriously, but you gave her a weary sigh.

"I don't wish to see Doctor Grant."

Valentina chuckled, as you handed your ticket to the clerk passing in the corridors. On the other end of the line, she then spoke;

"You're not getting away with this, Y/N. I'm not authorizing your return to work until Roland confirms to me that your mental state is stable for you to continue."

You prop your feet up on the seat, switching your cell phone to another ear. "Val, I'm not running away, I promise. I just needed a break. Give me a few days, okay? Reschedule the visit, I'll be there. I'll even be there early."

She pauses thoughtfully, you can hear her breathing. And then she sighs in defeat and you smile. "Okay. If it's any encouragement, your next service is already being prepared. It's something you've never stolen before, and I'd like it to be yours. Of course, if you prove suitable."

A few weeks ago, the temptation would have been too much and you would have turned around and gone to the appointment just to win Grant's approval and be cleared for the job. To prove not only to Valentina, but to the world, and to any other colleague, that you could complete that mission. 

But now you let out a short laugh, and that surprises Valentina enough for her to keep quiet. "Reschedule for the end of the week. I guarantee that I'll have Dr. Grant's approval and you'll have your order in no time."

The promise seems to be enough for her, and after another sigh, Valentina hangs up. You put your cell phone away and return your attention to the now-stamped train ticket to New York.

The trip didn't take long, and within a few hours, you were in the bustling city. Especially today, at the inaugural Heroes of Earth celebration event, Manhattan was almost chaotic.

With fans and journalists from all over the world filling the streets that had been closed off for a sort of open-air Comic Con, you had no trouble at all going unnoticed in the crowd. You wore a disguise, of course, but you didn't have to. A few minutes into the fair, you really did look like a tourist, with your Avengers sweatshirt, cap, and colorful glasses.

The knives in your backpack were well hidden under the amount of superhero souvenirs you got.

You were trying to choose between an Incredible Hulk smash-burger or a portion of Thor's worthy chicken when the bell announcing the photo session with the Avengers was about to start.

Your appetite disappeared, anxiety taking over your whole body at once.

It was time to move.

The queue was huge, as was to be expected. At least, most of them were there for the best-known Avengers. Thor wasn't even on Earth, which meant that the other five originals were competing with each other over who got the most autographs. The new members, like Wanda, the Falcon, or Vision, were given presentation stands but had much more free time at the event.

You tried to ignore the pang of pride when you saw that among the new members, the queue of people to see Wanda was the longest. A considerable number of children were very excited to ask her to do magic tricks.

Your strawberry milkshake - Black Widow's Special - almost fell out of your hand when you finally saw Wanda leave the curtains dividing the dressing rooms and join the autograph table.

She wasn't wearing the soft hoodie with the Avengers symbol from the photograph you sneak a peek at almost every night, nor was she wearing the pathetic disguise she wore the first time you saw her. No, somehow, she managed to look prettier. Like all her teammates, she was wearing an outfit similar to the official fighting uniform, probably designed just for the event. With a black tactical outfit covered by a red jacket, the gloves that didn't cover her fingers were probably your favorite part.

Despite her relatively unfriendly uniform, Wanda offered such lovely smiles to the people who came to greet her that you thought the milkshake made you sick, judging by the way your stomach and heart were unsettled.

When the Meet & Greets began, you had to go to the ticket booth and buy a single ticket in cash; to meet Wanda, of course.

It would take place back in the fair's improvised dressing rooms, and after waiting for almost forty minutes, you were finally guided inside. Your backpack wasn't searched, perhaps because your weapons were hidden by Ten Rings technology, a gift from Xu Xialing on your last assignment, and when it went through the X-ray at the entrance, all they detected were the countless fair toys you had acquired. And the knives hidden in your body, well, it's obvious to say that when it comes to changing aspects of your anatomy for any situation, passing a security search was quite easy.

"Miss Maximoff will be here in a minute. She had a little problem with her costume, the children who came in before you caused a little milkshake accident."

One of the organizers informed you, and you gave her a kind smile, commenting that the Black Widow special was essential, even if it might cause minor accidents. The employee chuckled before going to answer a call on her communicator that could have been your intentional flooding of one of the toilets to occupy as many of the staff as possible.

Wanda's dressing room was the most intimate environment of hers you've ever been in. It didn't have many things, of course, but for someone who only had access to government documents, it was paradise.

Curious fingers traced all the belongings you could reach, from more comfortable pieces of clothing for her to change into during the event, to different types of tea and books, until you found a music device. 

The password protection on a Stark Industries MP3 player made you laugh to yourself. "What a distrustful little witch." You murmured affectionately, stowing the item in your jacket pocket and moving over to the schedule board.

You had already read the row that marked the start of the Meets, probably described there and in all the other dressing rooms, when your gaze caught a small notebook forgotten in one of the armchairs.

You got the chance to take it in hand and smile at the sketches on the first few pages before the item was suddenly lifted and pulled out of your hand.

"Sorry, but this is private." Wanda grabbed the item out of the air, but you stood there, static like a frightened animal, unable to breathe properly under her gaze. She seemed to realize that she had been too harsh and huffed out a laugh, the notebook clutched tightly against her chest. The sound made you swallow. "I shouldn't have kept you waiting, I guess you got bored. Sorry about that. Let me put this away, and we can, um, get started."

She didn't use magic to return the book to a safe place, you didn't know that yet, but Wanda was still learning to trust her powers. And if she could help it, she usually didn't use them.

She approached you, to put the book away in a bag that you didn't have a chance to peek into, and the sudden movement made your body react in alarm. Your back hit the schedule board, and Wanda frowned, stopping in her tracks with an almost hurt look on her face.

"You don't have to be scared. I'm not going to hurt you, you know." She murmured with the tips of her ears red. "I'm just going to put my notebook away, you see." The backpack floated towards her with a tug, and Wanda hardly met your gaze after that. She tossed the bag into a corner of the room and fiddled uncomfortably with the edge of her blouse.

She was no longer wearing the outfit she'd worn before, she was wearing a comfortable set, too soft and domestic for you to be calm-minded about anything.

You forced your brain to work because you thought the whole thing was getting ridiculous.

"I'm not scared." Your voice comes out very hoarse, so you clear your throat. Wanda raises her eyes, finally, and the green irises make your cheeks warm. You don't hide it from her. "As a matter of fact, I'm not the one who usually gets scared when we meet, am I, Maximoff?"

Taking the time she needed to understand, you removed your colored glasses and cap, your face changing back to its original appearance. Wanda sighed shakily as soon as she recognized you.

"Hi, Y/N." She greeted, too sweet for you to do anything but smile shyly, forgetting for a moment exactly what you had come for. 

"Hello, Wanda." You tried to sound just as gentle, but you must have done a poor job, to blame it on your body that doesn't seem to be working properly. Wanda swallows dryly, her hands moving slowly in the air. You watch the unhurried gesture - the way her fingers draw the air, and how the items of disguise float away to the armchair, and in your hands appear handcuffs that don't prevent you from moving them, and don't hurt either. The most you feel is a tickle.

"I've come all this way, just for you to put me in chains, little witch." You try to tease her, and you think it's a victory the way Wanda tries to hide a smile, approaching with her head down until she's close enough to touch you.

Her hands should be gripping the magical handcuffs, but instead, they hold yours. Wanda sighs. 

"You can't be here." She whispers, meeting your eyes, and you think it's ridiculous that you made any plans at all. You could never do anything to harm Wanda, and that was just the truth. "Then why are you?"

Unlike her, you don't hide your smile. You shrug as if your heart wasn't thumping in your chest, and revel in playing with Wanda's buttons.

"I was in the neighborhood. Wanted to say hi." Your casual reply makes her snort impatiently.

Her hands release yours, and you raise an eyebrow at Wanda's audacity to start searching you. 

"Wow, take me on a date first, love." You joke, but despite the new color her cheeks acquire due to the joke, the fond nickname, Wanda doesn't stop. She gropes in your pockets, reaches into your jacket, and grimaces with disapproval at every illegal item she finds. The false documents, the Shield badge, the guns. The MP3 is in the front pocket and Wanda gets a little closer to reach it, enough so that you have to lick your lips trying to control the instinct to break the distance. She just looks so kissable and smells so good.

She offers you an incredulous look at the stolen item, which floats back to the table as she gropes for the other pocket. Finding the train ticket, she lets out a short laugh.

"Six hours of travel is not being in the neighborhood." She comments, raising her eyes to you. 

"What do you want me to say?" You retort with a little smile, discourteously glancing between her eyes and her lips. "That I couldn't help myself and had to get on the first train to see you again? That I can't even go back to work because I can't stop thinking about you?"

There's this thing that Wanda's eyes do. The pupils get huge, and the green darkens. And she looks at you as if you were something to be devoured in every detail as if you were worth admiring. As if you were worth any of her time.

She speaks again, so low and hoarse that you wouldn't be able to hear her if you weren't close.

"Your thoughts are loud. Are you always so hard on yourself?" 

You swallow dry, caught off guard. Your hesitation makes Wanda sigh. She looks ready to apologize when you nod.

"It doesn't matter, every time we bump into each other, you make me feel different. Better. You look at me as if you can see more. What do you see, Wanda?"

She sighs deeply, and her hands move to touch your face. It's too gentle, and affectionate in a real and true way that you never experience. Your body goes rigid, not knowing how to handle the tenderness, but Wanda doesn't catch any request for her to stop touching, so her hands continue to hold your cheeks.

"I can see your anger, just as I can see your fear. I see the thief, and the murderer, but I can also see only you. No disguises, no lies. The person you are underneath it all." She says, swallowing dryly as she lets her gaze fall to your lips. "This is the person I let get away. And the person I'd like to meet, if you'll let me."

Your chest is heavy with confusing feelings. Your traumas beep in unison, your defenses beg you to push Wanda away and flee before the rest of the Avengers decide to show up. 

But instead, you return watery eyes to Wanda and gasp softly; "Why? Why do you care?"

And Wanda tries to lie. "I think you could use a friend."

You chuckle dryly, pulling away from the touch. "Hard pass." You mutter, but Wanda doesn't let you move away entirely. She decides to risk everything.

She grabs your chin and tilts your face towards her. It's a miscalculated kiss, you both flinch and gasp at the first contact of your lips and being taken by surprise makes you lose your balance in the middle of the movement to get away from her.

You fall into the armchair, and Wanda should apologize, but she doesn't even bother. She pushes your tense shoulders and straddles your lap, this time, when her mouth meets yours, it's much hungrier and more determined.

The handcuffs disappear into thin air with the first gasp that leaves her lips, and you waste no time in grabbing her waist, roughly pulling her down and holding her tight against you as your mouths move together. It's a passionate kiss full of urgency, charged with all the tension you've built up.

Your tongue slides into her mouth without warning, more experienced than Wanda, you manage to get a whimper out in no time. She wants to shrink away from the sound, but your hands slide down to grab her ass and pin her down onto your front, and suddenly all she can do is moan.

It seems absurd that you've gone a lifetime without kissing Wanda Maximoff when you both seem molded to do this with perfection.

You don't even move apart to breathe, a battle of restless hands and hungry mouths panting against each other. Wanda begins to grind herself into your lap in search of friction and you let out a sound you didn't know you could make.

Everything is suddenly so hot that Wanda doesn't hear her surroundings. She doesn't hear the curtain or the footsteps. But she definitely hears the machine man's surprised exclamation.

"Oh, forgive me, Wanda." Vision's back is turned the second he catches a glimpse of what's happening in that armchair.

Wanda jumps away as if she's received a jolt, and you groan in displeasure at the interruption. Despite the way every cell in your body seems to be vibrating with euphoria, you manage subtle changes in your face that prevent the Synthesized from recognizing you if he decides to turn around. "I didn't mean to interrupt-"

"Vis, please leave." She demands with ragged breathing, her face bright red. Wanda looks neither at you nor at Vision.

The man clears his throat, stuttering. "Of course, Wanda, I'm so sorry." He says, but although he mentions leaving, he doesn't. Stopping just before the curtain, he risks a glance over his shoulder. "There was a forced distraction with criminal indications in the western sector, the fair has already been interrupted. The captain has asked everyone to gather for a patrol check, in case there's an attempted attack. I just wanted to warn you. It would be appropriate to send your... friend away." explains the machine, exchanging a quick glance with Wanda before leaving the dressing room.

You'd like to kiss her again, but Wanda sniffles at Vision's departure and you frown in a mixture of concern and confusion.

"That's why you're here, isn't it?" She deduces annoyed. "To try a bloody attack on a children's fair? God, I’m so stupid. You’re obviously using me to distract your partners-”

But you stood up with an impatient sigh for the anxious and nervous conclusions of an avenger who has been caught in the act.

You grab Wanda again and kiss her hard enough for her to lose her balance, and she ends up pressed against the schedule board, and then the coffee table, each kiss more desperate and heated than the last.

Your thigh presses between hers, and Wanda practically meows at the friction. You love how responsive she is to your touch, and you try to push a little further under her clothes, quickly addicted to attracting more sounds.

And you're almost to the edge of her bra when you're interrupted again.

"Jesus, Maximoff, what the hell is going on here?" Unlike Vision, Natasha Romanoff is much more serious and determined to put an end to the whole thing. And she cares little about what was happening against the table. You hide the change in your features on Wanda's shoulder, while also trying to control your own breathing, somehow much more aroused than before. "We're working, Maximoff. There may be terrorists on the perimeter and you're here, well, I'm not judging, I'm just saying there's an appropriate time for everything. I'm sure your friend will survive if you let go of her mouth for a few hours. Who knows, maybe next time you can meet in a more appropriate place?" 

When you finally look at Nat, you can see that she's hiding a teasing little smile. You're glad that Wanda is making friends.

And unlike you, who doesn't mind having been caught not once but twice by the Avengers, Wanda looks like an embarrassed tomato who nods quickly while her magic does the work of adjusting your half-open clothes and leaving the objects you bump into in order again. 

"Of course, Natasha, I'll send her away. I'm sorry." Wanda practically pushes you out, dragging you to a more secluded area at the back of the dressing rooms.

She tries unwillingly to resist your eager hands or the quick but intense kisses you steal from her on the way.

"You have to go." She struggles to gasp, her hands pushing your shoulders to stop the whole thing or she wouldn't be able to think.

Wanda with her hair disheveled after a proper make-out session, her face flushed and her lips swollen is too much for you.

"Fuck." You gasp and she swallows.

"What?" 

You don't know what to say, nothing seems enough. She's awakened something in you that you didn't know existed. Suddenly, the idea of staying away from her seems an impossibility.

"When will I see you again?"

She frowns at the question, laughing nervously. "We shouldn't have seen each other even today."

But your hands pull her by the waist. "Nonsense. We should definitely do this again.” Your lips trail down her jaw, to the sensitive points on her neck that you're trying to memorize. She sighs, and struggles to keep her eyes open, but only for a moment before she pushes you away again, laughing shyly.

"Please, darling, I need to get back, my job-"

"There's no attempt attack, I flooded a toilet so I'd have time to see you." You clarify quickly and Wanda has to shake her head and laugh incredulously.

"You're nuts."

"Honestly? Yes. I think I've figured out what was wrong with me over the last weeks. You’re driving me nuts, Wanda Maximoff. I can't stop thinking about you." You retort quickly, not caring about the irregular beating of your pulse, nor the way she blushes heavily. "I need to know when I'm going to see you again."

She looks back into the dressing rooms and can see that Natasha is coming out through the curtain. She approaches you at once to give you one last intense kiss and whispers goodbye on your lips as you part.

With every inch of skin that Wanda touched vibrating and your heart pounding in your chest, you only remember to regulate your powers and return to a disguise a good few minutes after she has disappeared from sight, and hope that no security cameras saw you there.

[ihavemanyhusbands]

Tender

Also on AO3

Pairing: Duncan Vizla x Fem!Reader

WC: 4.2k words

Summary: based on this blurb of Duncan saving you after your car crashed near his cabin during a snowstorm. He nurses you back to health and you wait out the storm with him, growing closer with each passing day.

Warnings: angst (light), a little instance of whump (car accident, sickness), fluff, mutual pining, lovey dovey smut, unprotected p in v (dont do it at home), aaand honestly i think thats it! But lmk if anything else!

------------------------------

Everything had been a blur at first. The dark, winding roads that your high beams could barely break through. The unforgiving flurries of snow that enveloped your car, almost turning it into a glistening white tomb. The fear, the sobbing, and the pleas for your stupidity to be forgiven. 

Ironically, it was the crash that saved you. Nothing deadly, of course, given how slow you were driving. But it was still enough to give you whiplash, your sense of survival numbing you to anything else.

The chill seeped to your very bones as you pulled yourself out, looking around at your dark, unfamiliar surroundings. A sea of nothing… and then there was another beacon of light, off in the distance. You could weep with joy if you’d been able to.

Stumbling there had seemed eternal, perhaps punishment for putting yourself in that situation in the first place. You fell once or twice, still disoriented, but you didn’t rest until you reached your destination — an old cabin, with only one of the porch lights on. It had to be fate.

You barely remembered actually getting there, much less knocking on the door. But suddenly there was a tall, rugged man in the doorway, disheveled in a way that indicated he’d just woken up. The sight of you gave him a momentary pause, but then he ushered you inside.

He sat you before the fire and brewed tea for you, worried at your lack of speech. He’d tried asking questions without much luck, and in the end, all you could give him was your name. Warmth returned to you slowly after that, reaching your extremities last. Clarity was still far from your mind, though, especially as the warmth turned into a fever. 

He nursed you all through the night, driven by a sudden protective streak. Truthfully, the whole thing had been a whirlwind, leaving him with more questions than answers. Still, even if you were a stranger that he couldn’t yet absolve from suspicion, he couldn’t just leave you as you were. 

He’d tucked you into his bed, adding an extra blanket on top, and sat on a pillow beside it. He kept a cold compress on your forehead, trying to keep the fever from worsening. It had been strange at first, taking care of someone other than himself. The sight of you, with a feverish pallor and shuddering so hard your teeth clacked, was piteous. 

Many times in the past, whether or not someone lived had been a decision he had to make, but this wasn’t the case. Nothing had ever made him feel more helpless, not knowing what else he could do to keep you going. It made his heart squeeze with anxiety, strangely enough.

You murmured things in your sleep he couldn’t quite understand, restlessly tossing and turning. That reassured him that at least you weren’t slipping away. A part of him couldn’t help but find it fascinating. 

He had been living alone out there for a long time, not having much of a chance for this sort of human interaction. And when he did have a chance to interact with others, well… It wasn’t exactly to be a tender caregiver. 

By the time morning came and a thin, watery light filtered in through the windows, he had fallen asleep slumped against the bed. His head was resting near one of your hands, and when you woke up, you noticed your fingers were woven through his graying locks. 

You blinked, trying to comprehend the sight. Without moving, your eyes darted around as you tried to gather your bearings. A piercing headache made you wince, but still, some memories of the previous evening floated back to you. 

You hadn’t gotten a proper chance to take a look at your savior before, but from what you could tell he was strong and muscular under his winter clothes. He had a thick mustache and salt-and-pepper stubble, but you couldn’t see all of his features very well from that angle.

Slowly, so as not to disturb him, your hand retreated from his hair. Still, he woke up immediately, lifting his head. Your eyes met as you two froze, unsure of how to proceed.

“U-um… Hi,” you said, your voice raspy and weak. 

“Hello,” he said, clearing his throat. “How… How are you feeling?”

“Alive, but just barely. Kinda loopy… like I’m still in a dream.”

He stood up, both wanting to put some distance between you and wanting to be helpful. He clenched and unclenched his fists nervously. 

“Can I get you anything?”

“Maybe some water, please, um…” you stared at him, prompting.

“Duncan,” he said, realizing he hadn’t had the chance to tell you. 

“Duncan,” you repeated. “Um, well this is an interesting situation. I’m really sorry about, you know, almost dying at your doorstep.” 

He huffed in amusement, one of the corners of his full lips pulling up in a faint, relieved grin. He was very handsome, you decided, taking in his dark eyes, slightly crooked nose, and chiseled jaw. A little weathered perhaps, but that only added to his look. 

You hoped that, in contrast, you didn’t look just as horrible as you felt. But that had to be the least of your worries at that moment. First thing on the list was making sure you recovered and were able to continue on your way after.

“It’s all good, I’m just glad you didn’t actually die,” he said. “I’ll try to make sure it stays that way.”

You nodded gratefully. He went over to the kitchen and brought back a glass of water. You painstakingly sat up on the bed and downed it all in one go, not having realized you were absolutely parched. He got you another one, but this time he tried to get you to drink it slowly.

“Any better?” He asked, brows slightly furrowed. “I could make you some food, too, if you’re hungry.”

“I want to help,” you said, starting to push the covers off of yourself. 

Your aching muscles made you wince, grimacing, and he set a tentative hand on your shoulder to stop you. Then, realizing his actions, his hand quickly retreated.

“It’s, er, no trouble. Probably better for you to conserve energy. Do you like oatmeal?”

You nodded, still unsure. “Are you sure? I have troubled you so much already…”

“It’s okay, really,” he insisted. “I did just tell you I’d make sure to keep you alive, didn’t I?”

His attempt to lighten the mood was punctuated with a small, awkward grin, which you found incredibly charming. You relaxed a little at that, smiling sheepishly in return.

“Alright, but as soon as I’m better, you can’t stop me from helping.”

——————————

In the next couple of days, your health began to improve. Your fever finally abated on the third night, and by the next morning, you were up and about. You kept your promise about helping around the place, and there truly was nothing Duncan could do to stop you.

He’d thrown your clothes in the washer while you showered, so you had to wear one of his large flannel shirts. It reached past your knees, and you had to fold the sleeves back a few times, but it was very comfortable otherwise. 

You shooed him away while you made breakfast, insisting it was your turn to treat him. It was the least you could do after everything.

He sat in his armchair, the book on his lap forgotten as he covertly watched you move around the small kitchen. He was fascinated by the domestic image, never having thought he could attain it. Already you breathed life into the cabin, smiling and humming softly to yourself, feeling better than you had felt in a long time.

You’d grown closer in those past days, talking whenever you were awake. He had already ruled out any suspicion and was willing to be more open with you. He didn’t speak much about his job, though, and he’d deeply appreciated you not pushing the subject.

You had your own secrets to keep, after all, and you understood the importance of one’s personal privacy. You were still strangers, even if you owed him your life. Beyond that though, you felt comfortable with him, safe. Despite his tough seeming exterior, he was a softie underneath, and not to mention a gentleman. 

You couldn’t help being drawn to him, and it seemed he couldn’t help but be drawn to you in return. He was a little better at being subtle about it, though, especially since he didn’t really know what to do about what he was feeling.

“How do you like your eggs?” You asked, glancing at him over your shoulder.

He cleared his throat, shaking his head a little to snap himself out of his thoughts. 

“Er, scrambled or fried, whatever you prefer,” he said, picking his book back up only to read the same sentence over and over again.

You chuckled softly, noticing the tips of his ears had gone red. When you finished cooking, you served him at the small dining table and sat across from him. You heard the distant howl of wind outside the window, but the storm didn’t seem to be nearly as bad anymore. 

“Think it should die down in a couple more days, right?” You said.

Duncan glanced out of the window and thought for a moment. “Yes, I think so. Winter’s been harsher this year.”

“It’s what we get for living so far up north, I guess,” you sighed. “I live in Triple Oak proper. Small apartments don’t really have the best heating. I have a lot of blankets, though, so that helps some.”

“You live by yourself?” He asked before he could think about it.

You nodded, moving your food around your plate nervously. “Yeah, kind of recent, but it was a long time coming.”

He grunted in response, turning back to his food. He would always return the courtesy of not pressing, and you were infinitely thankful for that too. 

The two of you ate in silence for a moment, and you snuck a glance at him. There were no signs in the cabin that anyone else had lived there for a while, but you could never be too sure. 

“I don’t want to presume but… you’re not exactly waiting for more company either, are you?” You tried to sound as casual as possible despite the embarrassment of asking in the first place.

“No,” was all he said, and again you left it at that. 

“Do you ever get scared a bear might get you out here?” You asked instead, changing the subject.

He chuckled. “No, but I have seen some around a few times. We mostly stay out of each other’s ways.”

You blinked. “Mostly?” 

“Well, I can’t just let them rummage through my trash cans.”

You could be a bear yourself, the size that you are. The thought came into your mind unbidden, and you felt your face heat up. It would be a lie to say you hadn’t checked him out more than once. Or thought of his strong arms enveloping you, your fingers running through his hair…

You took a shaky sip of coffee, trying to remain composed. To your luck, he didn’t seem to notice.

“It has definitely been nice having some company,” he said softly, not looking at you. 

“Yeah, I think so too,” you said with a small smile. “Crazy as it was… It was really good to meet you, Duncan.”

He smiled in return, glancing up. There was something between you, some sort of energy, that felt inevitable. It was all just a matter of when, and based on the fact that you couldn’t really leave the cabin, well… The clock was ticking.

When you finished eating, you cleaned up as he went to build a fire in the hearth. You insisted on helping with some other chores, like cleaning up the mess that the cabin had become in just a couple of days. 

You wished you could open the windows and let some fresh air in, but that would have to wait until the storm had subsided. The two of you worked in different sections of the cabin for the next few hours, getting a lot more done in a lot less time.

Once you were finally done, you slumped down before the fire. Duncan sat next to you, leaving a respectable distance between you. You wanted to tell him you wouldn’t bite if he sat any closer, but you weren’t brave enough to be that forward yet. 

“We kinda make a good team, don’t we?” You said, leaning back and stretching your legs in front of the hearth.

He nodded, glancing at you sideways. His eyes were drawn down to the smooth expanse of your bare legs, the orange light of the flames flickering over them. He swallowed hard and looked away, willing himself to keep it together. 

You inched closer to his side until your hands were barely touching. He tensed a little at the contact, but didn’t move away. His heart started pounding in his chest. 

“It really is pretty cozy in here,” you said, sighing contentedly. “I’m definitely going to miss it when I go back home.”

“You may stay as long as you need,” he said, internally dreading the moment of your parting. 

“That’s very sweet of you, but I wouldn’t want to overstay my welcome… I kind of feel like I already am.”

“Not at all,” he said resolutely, frowning slightly. “But even so, you may also visit whenever, my door will always be open to you.”

“Bonded for life, huh?” you teased, playfully bumping his arm with yours.

He huffed in amusement. “Something like that.”

You glanced down at your hands and ever-so-slowly, you hooked your pinky over his. Your entire face felt warm, and for a moment you thought he might pull his hand away… but he didn’t.

“I’ll definitely take you up on it,” you murmured, grinning wryly. “You’ll get sick of me coming around so much.”

He shook his head. “I don’t think I could.”

In a moment of supreme boldness, he decided to wrap his arm around your shoulders. He brought you closer to his side, making your breathing hitch. He was warm and smelled faintly of pine needles and cigarette smoke. You leaned your head against him.

“It’ll be pretty quiet around here without you, that’s for sure,” he added, resting his chin on the top of your head. 

Your heart hurt for him then. You wanted to help him not feel so lonely, to show him the same tenderness and care he had shown you – which you both so desperately needed. You pulled back slightly to look at him, your faces inches apart. You searched each other’s eyes for something – perhaps confirmation – and it was yours that flicked to his lips first. 

“U-um…” you breathed, not entirely sure of what to say.

Turns out, you didn’t need to say anything. He leaned in, gently cupping your face with his free hand, and his lips met yours. It was just an experimental peck first, but when your mouth sought his again, it became a proper kiss. You melted against him, clinging onto his sweater as your lips parted to give his tongue access.

You kissed for what seemed like an eternity, unrushed, just enjoying the feeling of one another. He pulled you onto his lap and you wrapped your arms around his neck. His large hands had settled on your hips, inches away from the bare skin of your legs. 

Then you pulled back, dazed and panting, leaning your forehead against his. Your heart was beating fast, thumping against his chest. You tucked some hair away from his face and gazed at him for a moment.

“Sorry if I took you by surprise,” you whispered with a sheepish grin. “I just… really wanted to do that.”

“Not as much as I did,” he joked, wrapping his arms around your waist. 

You raised an eyebrow, amused. “Oh, but you were just waiting for me to make a move first, weren’t you?”

“Maybe…” 

The two of you laughed, and there was a giddy feeling in your chest. The look on his face was earnest and hopeful, but there was something there that told you he still couldn’t believe it was happening. You cupped his face, gently stroking his cheeks with your thumbs. 

You bit your lip to contain a grin. “Do you want to do it again?”

“You don’t even need to ask,” he said, seconds before he pulled you back in. 

—-----------------------

Later that night, as you were starting to settle in for bed, you watched as Duncan grabbed stuff to sleep on the couch once again. You were internally debating whether or not to say something, but your desire for more overrode your doubts.

“Um, Duncan…” you said, fidgeting with the edge of the blanket nervously. “Do you want to maybe… share the bed tonight? I feel so bad about forcing you to sleep uncomfortably.”

He stopped mid motion and looked over at you. “Are you sure? I don’t mind at all.”

You nodded all too eagerly. “Yes, of course. Plus, it gets pretty cold when the fire dies out, and I wouldn’t mind sharing some heat…”

He was visibly affected by that, his spine straightening. Once more he swallowed hard, mouth opening and closing as he tried to find the right words.

“Y-yes, you’re right. I-I wouldn’t want you to freeze,” he said, nodding.

He carried his stuff over to the bed, sitting on the mattress hesitantly. You slipped inside the covers, lying on your back. Your eyes were beguiling as he glanced back at you, desire glittering in them. He slipped in beside you slowly, painstakingly making sure there was a little space between you. 

He wasn’t entirely sure what to do, many different instincts warring within him. He didn’t want to seem like he was pressuring you to do more. Kissing was all you had done earlier, despite the fact that your hands had wandered some over each other’s clothed bodies.  

In the end, he shut the lights off, leaving the room only faintly illuminated by the fire in the hearth. You pressed closer to him and he wrapped an arm around you as you rested your head on his chest. Your warmth against him was intoxication, and he had the urge to curl his body around yours.

“Goodnight,” he said softly.

“Goodnight,” you replied, wrapping an arm around his midsection. 

But in the still, quiet darkness, neither of you went to sleep. You lied there, expectant, hyper aware of his nearness and his smell and the comforting heat emanating from him. He was in the same position, tormented by it. Your fingers involuntarily traced lazy circles on his chest, and in response, one of his hands traced up and down your spine.

You let out a pleased hum, thoroughly enjoying his touch. His body shifted, and when you couldn’t take it anymore, you lifted your head so you could look at each other. And then you kissed him, slowly once again to start. 

But soon enough, the kiss grew needier, more ferocious. Teeth and tongues and lips clashing together, intent on devouring. With a shaky hand, you began to undo the buttons of the flannel shirt he had given you, and soon his hands touched skin instead of fabric. He groaned into your mouth then, already far too gone. 

“Can I?” he husked, wanting to see more of you.

You nodded and he pushed it off of you, an agonized look on his face as he took in your form next to him. His hands didn’t know where to go next, but his eyes lingered on your heaving chest – or, more specifically, the swell of your breasts. Gently, you took his wrist and guided them there. 

“God, you’re beautiful,” he murmured, kissing you once more. 

You could feel something insistently pressing against your hip, and you realized he was hard. A whimper escaped your throat and you arched against him as his hands continued their exploration. One of them ghosted past your ribcage and lingered in your abdomen, the tips of his fingers maddeningly close to the hem of your underwear. 

“Duncan…” you sighed as he pulled away to kiss your jaw and down the column of your throat. 

“Do you want me to take care of you?” he asked against your skin, making you shudder.

“Yes,” you pleaded. “Yes, but I want to touch you, too.”

“Touch me wherever you like.”

His hand continued its slow trail south, and you lifted your hips to let him take your panties off. Your legs spread for him eagerly, and you brought your hand down to palm his erection over his briefs. He sucked in a breath through his teeth, hips bucking against your touch. 

He let out a tortured sound as his fingers finally found purchase, finding you soaked already. His fingers slid through your folds with ease, but his touch was gentle and exploratory. You gasped, mewling desperately. You continued to touch him in turn, both excited and intimidated by the size and girth of him. You slipped your hand beneath the hem, wanting to touch the velvety skin of it.

“Take these off,” you murmured, tugging at the hem.

He pulled them off his hips and kicked them the rest of the way off. Your fingers curled around the shaft, pumping slowly. His lips found yours again sloppily, a moan low in his throat. His fingers circled your clit, making you jerk against him. Once he found a rhythm that you seemed to really like, he held you to him as you bucked and writhed, nearing your orgasm.

“Don’t stop,” you choked out, muscles taut as a bowstring.

And in a matter of seconds, you shattered under his expert ministrations. A flint sparked low in your belly, spreading outward in waves of pleasure. You clung to him with a cry, lest you became unmoored.  

“Just like that,” he encouraged, kissing the corner of your lips. “Let go for me.”

His movements did not stop until you gripped his wrist from overstimulation. Your heart nearly leapt out of your chest in the aftermath. You gave him a piteous, agonized look, begging him for more.

“I need you inside me,” you whimpered. “I-I can’t take it anymore. I need you close.”

He didn’t need any more convincing, adjusting your bodies and sliding over you. Your knees drew up beside his hips and he spat down on his cock, spreading it by pumping it in his fist. The head of it teased through your folds, coating itself in your arousal, and then he was slowly pushing inside of you.

You reached up and clung to the corner of the pillow under your head with one hand, mouth slack with all the sensations the stretch brought. Your name slipped past his lips deliriously as he fucked into you shallowly, letting you get used to him. More of his weight leaned on you, and you trembled under him like a doe pinned by the jaws of a mountain lion.

“F-fuck… You’re b-big,” you panted. “Feels s-so fucking good.”

He moaned near your ear, the cant of his hips becoming longer, his length slowly drawing back before sliding back into the hilt. Your wanton moans ascending in a rhythmic spiral were like music to his ears. He was hypnotized by the way your breasts bounced with each thrust, and the way you were clenching around him so sweetly, sucking him back in… It was all rapidly leading him to the edge. 

“You feel like heaven,” he husked, his voice soft and dreamlike. 

You lost yourselves in each other’s bodies, making it last as long as possible. He reached down between you and slicked his thumb over your clit in time with his thrusts. Pleasure mounted once more, to the point where you were practically yowling like a wildcat. You couldn’t even form a sentence, your mind clouded over in a haze of ecstasy.

Your knees pressed against his sides as you came even harder than before. He came soon after with a rough groan, leaning his forehead against yours. He remained fully sheathed inside of you, not wanting to separate for even a moment, despite your sweat slicked skins sticking together. 

You let out a winded chuckle, awash in endorphins, and he smiled beatifically. He tucked your hair away from your face and took a long look at you, as if committing you to memory. He had never seen anyone so beautiful before, and not to mention sweet as honey. Maybe it had been fate that you ended up there, fitting so perfectly in his arms. 

“Would you… Maybe consider staying a little longer?” He murmured, touching the tip of his nose against yours.

You nodded, your smile taking on a playful edge. “I think that can be arranged… As long as you’ll have me.”

At that moment, if it were up to him, then he would have you stay for good.  But for now, he was content with taking it one day at a time. 

-------------

[barefoothighlander]

The way you write ghost and like a specific reader is so good it has me going insane, on that I just read the cottage one where Simon admits to himself he loves sweet things and would it be possible to get a baker reader x Simon, with him often comming because he's hooked on their desserts but also how fine they are

something sweet

this is possibly one of my FAV tropes, thank you!!

warnings: fluff, gn pronouns, mutual pining, mentions of food throughout, ooc!ghost, kissing, not proofread

People always assumed Ghost ate purely for nutrients, the majority of the meals he consumed on base or in the field involving all four food groups, centred on protein. The truth was he had to stop himself every day from eating entire sleeves of cookies, his favourite being the bourbon biscuits that his mum used to buy.

He had an insatiable sweet tooth, always having loads of sugar in his tea, sneaking into the mess late at night to steal sweets from the kitchen, if you were to search his pockets you’d find wrappers for candy littered throughout them.

He was less restrained when he came home, often buying some sort of treat to pair with his tea when he’d visit a cafe, he’d gone for a walk that morning and decided to explore a few shops, stumbling across a bakery that he’d never been into.

It wasn’t even a question of should he go in, the scent of baked goods wafting from the open door as he looked through the window, trays lined with pastries and cakes, he was practically salivating at the sight of them.

He felt out of place in the cafe, his eyes falling in various couples having coffee together, a few others set up with their laptops as they picked at their food.

“What can I get for you?”

He didn’t intend for the interaction to be awkward, he’d never stumbled over his own words but the sight of you, hair messy, sleeves rolled up, a mess of flour sprinkled over your apron as your wide eyes and bright smile looked back at him had him frozen.

“You look like a tea guy, earl grey?”

How could you possibly know that? He moves closer to the counter, doing his best to make his stride less intimidating as he approaches you.

“How’d you know?”

“Get a lot of customers, I’ve gotten pretty good at knowing what people like”

Heat flushed his cheeks under his balaclava, his eyes nervously moving from your face to the display beside him.

“What do you recommend”

You follow his line of sight, pursing your lips as you think over the options,

“The muffins are good, chocolatines are a favourite, personally I’m partial to the biscuits”

“Which kind?”

“Bourbons are my favourite, the empires are a close second”

He hums in response, “Those are my favourite”

“You have good taste”

He moves his gaze back to you, “I like to think so”

You huff a small laugh, your fingers tapping against the counter as you lose yourself for a moment in his dark eyes.

“So earl grey and some bourbons”

“Sounds perfect”

You swallow a lump in your throat, biting back a smile as you move to collect his order, you toss a few biscuits into the bag, placing the tea bag in a cup before pouring the hot water on top, capping it and handing the pair to him.

“I threw in a few other things I thought you’d like”

“That’s very kind”

His fingers brush against yours as he takes the items from you, the contact making the hairs on your neck stand up. You drop your gaze nervously, smoothing your hair before turning back to him,

“Have a nice day” You stop your sentence abruptly, your eyes squinting slightly at him,

"Simon"

"Have a nice day Simon"

It was less than 24 hours before he was back, strutting through the front doors, oblivious to the various shared glances between other customers, his sights dead set on you.

"Back so soon?"

"How'd you know?"

"Know what?"

"Those extras you gave me yesterday, that raspberry thing and those little chocolates, how'd you know I'd like them"

"I didn't really, just a guess, they're my favourites"

"You have good taste"

"I'd hope so, I'm the one that makes them"

In a moment of realization, he looks around, there's no one else behind the counter, no noises from the kitchen, it really is just you there.

"You own the shop"

"For two years now"

"That's impressive"

You tilt your head down to hide the flush on your cheeks, smiling, "I have something for you"

"You made me something?"

"Was hoping you'd be back"

It's his turn to hide his face, even behind his mask he's scared you'd see the pink tint to his skin, the way his eyes crinkle at the edges, you push a small tray toward him, a cup of tea paired with an assortment of treats.

"I am supposed to stay in shape"

"C'mon, try them" You nudge the tray a little closer

"Only if you eat them with me"

"Deal"

You turn to grab an extra fork, resting your elbows on the table as you portion off a piece of the small pastry in front of you, careful to create the perfect bite,

"Wait, you need to get some of the jam"

"You're telling me how to eat?"

"It has to be perfect"

You use your fork to push some jam onto his piece, nodding to yourself in satisfaction, he takes a quick glance behind him to see if anyone is watching before lifting his mask just slightly, revealing his lips, your eyes linger on them for a little too long, the soft arch of them, their plush pink tint.

"This is amazing"

His praise breaks your trance, your hand covering your mouth as you smile, hiding the food inside it, "I told you"

"You're right, I'll never doubt you again"

You let out a giggle and this time he can't hide his smile, a small dimple forming beside his lips as they curve, you could watch him smile all day.

"This might be strange but, what are you doing later," You ask with a breath of confidence,

"Working off all this sugar you're feeding me"

"What about you skip the workout and meet me here at seven?"

"I'd like that"

You bite back a smile, "Great"

You pack the remaining treats in a small bag, handing it to him before bidding him goodbye, your senses focused solely on him, completely ignorant of the line of customers forming in front of your eyes.

It's a panicked few hours around the cafe, rushing to fill orders, tidying the kitchen, and attempting to find time to fix yourself up before Simon arrived.

The bell atop the door rang at 6:53, apparently, he was insistent on being early, he calls out for you, your voice echoing from the kitchen as he makes his way behind the counter.

"Hey, you're early"

"You're a mess" His eyes scan over your flour-clad form, your hair a mess as your palms dig into a circle of dough.

"Had to get some orders done before tomorrow, wanna help?"

"Not sure how good I'll be"

"Please, I could use your muscles"

"Alright," He rolls his sleeves up his arm, revealing his tattoo before reaching behind him to grab an apron, securing it around his form. You erupt in a fit of laughter as you turn your gaze to him,

"What's so funny?"

"Nothing just, never pictured you in an apron covered in tulips and daisies"

"You saying it looks bad?"

"No, you look perfect," You say, fighting back your laughter, "Okay, grab a piece and start pushing it with your palms, just like this" You demonstrate the move to him, his curious eyes watching intently as you knead the dough, sprinkling bits of flour on it.

"Got it" He places a circle of dough on the table, dropping some flour onto it before digging his palms in, quickly turning to you with worried eyes as his hand forces a hole in the centre.

"Maybe not so tough, try like this" You position yourself next to him, your sides pressing against each other as you rest your hands atop him, guiding them into the dough, your gentle fingers intertwining with his.

"Got it?"

He shakes his head lightly, "I think you need to show me again"

You laugh lightly, the sound warming his chest as you slowly release your touch, urging him to work, "That's better, I have to make some icing so I'll be over there for a minute"

You move from his side, wiping your hands on your apron before standing in front of the large mixer, he watches as you struggle to lift the large bag of powdered sugar, dropping his task to help you. He lifts the bag with ease, watching as you release a small breath of gratitude,

"Wait not all at... once" Your instructions come too late, he dumps the entire bag into the bowl, a cloud of sugar enveloping the room as you drop your head in laughter.

"I'm so sorry, I didn't know"

You raise your hands, palms to the roof as you smile, "It's okay, kinda looks like snow"

"Kind of"

His gaze softens as you close your ears, tilting your neck back and slightly sticking your tongue out, allowing the sugar to settle on the muscle, the sweetness dancing over your tastebuds.

You smile, lifting your head back up and opening your eyes, he's watching you with such adoration in his eyes, his heart swelling out of his chest, he'd never met anyone that maintained such a wonder in themselves, you were so warm, so kind, he'd always been punished for mistakes but the sight of you unknowingly creating a happy memory out of one of his mishaps has his brain rewiring.

He doesn't think, just reaches for you, one hand lifting his mask while the other grabs at your waist, tugging you into him, his lips crash into yours as if his addiction to sweets wasn't enough, you literally tasted like sugar, he couldn't get enough. His free hand moving to cup your jaw, his thumb swiping over the skin as you press yourself into him, your gentle hands settling around his arms as he holds you close.

It's intoxicating, his taste, his scent, tobacco, vanilla, and sugar, you had managed to escape the consequences of a sweet tooth until now, this was a taste you'd never get sick of.

He pulls back with a heavy breath, his chest rising against yours as he rests his forehead against yours, that beautiful smile beaming back at you as your flesh ignites under his touch.

"Kiss me like that again and I'll give you all the baked goods you want"

He lets out a laugh, a genuine laugh, one he hasn't heard in years before pressing his lips to yours again, smiling against your skin as the sugar settles around the two of you, cloaking the room in a soft white dust.

[asdfghjklmals]

SLEEPING WITH THE ENEMY✩༶‧˚

GENRE + T/W: sfw, fluff. WORD COUNT: 3.8k words. TAGS: satoru gojo x fem!oc. lovesick!gojo, lovesick!oc. hardcore mutual pining.

SYNOPSIS: oc gojo girlfriend and satoru are assigned an overnight mission together, but what happens when there's only one bed? AUTHOR'S NOTE: this fic takes place one week after love at first fight, so be sure to read it to know what happened last week 😊 and yes, satoru is the enemy in this title. the one tricky thing about writing student!satoru and oc gojo girlfriend is doing the research of what was used back in 2006-2007. like earphones and an mp3 player?! REMINDER: if you want to imagine yourself in oc gojo girlfriend's character descriptions instead, please do!

“hey (y/n)! yaga-sensei is looking for you.” suguru greeted you as he passed by you in the hallway of tokyo jujutsu high. you had just got out of the community showers after a very tiring close combat training session with mei mei.

you tossed your towel behind your shoulder, “he is? why?”

it's never a good thing when yaga-sensei is looking for anyone—that meant that you were in trouble or you had a mission. you haven't been assigned any missions yet, and you already got in trouble the other day for hemming your uniform skirt too short.

“he said to meet him in the classroom,” suguru said with an amusing smile, “i think you’re going to go on your first mission.”

“what?! really?!” you were so excited. you had been at jujutsu high for over a month now. yaga-sensei didn’t want to send you on any missions until you brushed up on your close combat. he knew that you could defend and attack in long ranges due to your cursed technique, but he didn’t want you to risk getting injured because you couldn’t fight at a close range yet—so you worked extra hard to get better at close combat.

“yup! i think you’ll have a great first mission.” suguru confidently said knowing damn well that your first mission would be with the one and only—satoru gojo.

you entered the first years' classroom, sliding the door shut behind you.

"hi (y/n), glad you could make it." yaga-sensei started, "i'm sending you on your first mission tomorrow."

"okay, that's great, but what's he doing here?" you pointed at the white haired sorcerer.

yaga-sensei cleared his throat, "he'll be your partner for your upcoming mission. satoru has kindly offered to join."

"hey." satoru waved, greeting you with a smug smile.

you started to feel your cheeks burn in mortification, "can i go with suguru instead?"

satoru was offended and wanted to know why you didn't want to go on a mission with him. he wanted to spend time with you, so how could you ask for suguru instead? the girl he was chasing wanted his bestfriend out of all people? he folded his arms in dissatisfaction, "suguru is busy. what's wrong wi—"

your sensei saved you by interrupting, "i'll brief the you two tomorrow before you leave on your mission. make sure to be ready by 5pm."

later that night: (y/n)'s dorm room

you and shoko were painting your nails in your dorm room as you updated her on what had happened earlier today.

"sensei's sending you on your very first mission with gojo?" shoko giggled, painting dark green nail polish on her fingernails.

you frowned, "i mean... it's not a bad thing, since satoru's really strong and all. but out of all people—why does it have to be him?"

"probably because there is a whopping total of 6 students here at jujutsu high. that gives you a high probability of going on a mission with gojo at least once in your life."

"we haven't really talked since last week." you sighed.

"you two haven't actually had any alone time since that day he took you shopping for your birthday." shoko realized, "—and then the idiot got in trouble for sneaking out of your dorm room that morning..."

"yeah, let's not talk about that," you blushed at the memory, overflowing your nails with baby blue nail polish on accident. (read 'love at first fight' here)

shoko reassured you, "you'll be fine! it's gojo after all—the mission should be a piece of cake and you'll be back in no time."

the next day: mission briefing

"the city of chiba has requested that we exorcise any curses that are in the area of a new department store that they are in the process of building." yaga-sensei started, "they requested one sorcerer grade 1 or higher as it's a time crunch for them and they’re willing to pay the premium. this is easily a grade 3 or 4 mission, so i figured this would be a great first time mission for you to shadow, (y/n)."

"and you get the best person to shadow." satoru bragged knowing it was him you were shadowing.

you rolled your eyes at him, adverting your attention back to your sensei, "i'm guessing this a one-day mission and we leave tomorrow?"

yaga-sensei cleared his throat, "actually, it's overnight. jujutsu high has a reservation at the daiwa roynet hotel across the street from the department store lot. you two will be leaving tonight, spending the night in chiba to get an early start on your mission and then coming back in the evening. i expect a full report the morning after you come back."

overnight?

you and satoru had to share a hotel room overnight?

you peered over at satoru. he was tipped back in his chair, balancing on the back two legs, his arms folded behind his head. he looked very content with this mission. your heart felt like it was going to jump out of your chest and roll out the door.

satoru turned to look at you, "ready to go, (y/n)? you got your big girl pants on for your first mission?"

you shot an ice shard at him, hitting his infinity as he hehehe'd in his seat. yaga-sensei massaged his temples watching his two special grade students go at it.

‘are these two ever going to finally admit they like each other?’ the sensei asked himself.

"are we leaving or not?" you barked at satoru, holding out your arm for him to link his through so you could teleport with him.

satoru winked at his sensei and gave him two finger guns before taking your arm to loop over his, "see you later, sensei."

satoru clasped his hands and just like that—you were in shibuya station.

*****************************

"you have to work on your long distance transportation so we don't have to take the subway, satoru." you bullied your partner.

"i told you last week that i was working on it." satoru rolled his pretty blue eyes at you. "—i'm able to teleport further and further now."

"so how long until we get to chiba?" you asked satoru.

"it's about an hour by subway."

you and satoru were sitting side by side in the subway car. you could hear the rubber wheels rolling against the tracks, the voices of people talking, and the sounds from a teenager's video game sitting across from you. as you leaned over to dig in your bag for your earphones, your hand accidentally brushed satoru's.

you murmured an apology, "sorry..."

satoru raised his eyebrow, leaning into you and whispering in your ear. "if you want to hold my hand, all you have to do is ask."

"i don't want to hold your hand, satoru." you lied.

you looked over at satoru's hand that rested on his left thigh. his fingers were slender, nails and cuticles trimmed neatly. they looked soft. you wished that you had the courage to hold his hand.

he grinned, shaking his head in disbelief. he loved your feistiness. he could never get you to flirt back with him to save his life, but he lived for your retorts.

you went back to untangling your earphones so that you could listen to your mp3 player. after a moment, you turned to him, holding out the other half of your earphones, "wanna listen?"

"before i take this, what kind of music do you listen to?" satoru jabbed at you, "you seem like you'd only listen to pretty boy idols."

you rolled your eyes at him, "i actually have a wide taste in music. right now i'm listening to american 80's. they're my dad's favorite songs."

you smiled at the memory of touya handing you a cd from your father’s large collection of music. he told you that your father was a huge 80's fan before his passing. you spent a majority of your childhood listening to your father’s collection growing up.

satoru took the earphone from you and stuck it in his ear. his stared off into the corner of the subway car.

"so what's this song called?" he asked you, genuinely curious. he wanted to get to know you more, so this was his way of trying.

"it's called 'nothing's gonna change my love for you' by george benson." you beamed, "the love songs were so great in the 80's."

"it's nice."

"you haven't even listened to the whole song yet." you giggled, "do you even know what it's about?"

satoru laughed, "obviously nothing getting in the way of this guy's love for his girl."

"ooh! let me show you another one of my favorites." you said excitedly, "it's called 'nothing compares 2 u' by prince! he wrote it in the 80's but sinead o'connor released it in the 90's..." you continued to ramble.

satoru heart melted at the way your face lit up while you showed him some of your favorite old school songs. he had no idea what the hell you were talking about, but your bright and animated smile drew him in. he couldn't not listen to you talk about your favorite things in the world. he wanted to know every little thing about you. he wanted to always be by your side so that you could tell him about anything that made you happy.

later that night: checking into the hotel

after the hour long subway ride, you and satoru walked to the daiwa roynet hotel so you could check-in for the night.

satoru held your backpack for you as you walked up to the front desk. the front desk employee greeted you. "hi! welcome to the daiwa roynet hotel. how can i help you?"

"hi! we have a reservation under (y/n) (l/n) or satoru gojo. jujutsu high school should've made the reservation."

the employee smiled and nodded as they looked up the reservation. they started to furrow their eyebrows. it looked like something was wrong.

"i'm sorry, miss. we tried to contact you about your hotel room reservation, but we couldn't reach anyone."

"what's wrong with the reservation?" you asked, confused.

"it was originally booked for two queen beds, but we only have rooms with one standard queen bed at the moment."

"that can't be right..." you panicked, "what phone number did you call?"

you looked at your phone to see if you got a missed call. no missed calls were in your log.

“satoru, did you get a phone call by any chance?" you called out to him. satoru walked up to the front desk to join you. he looked at his phone as well, seeing no missed calls either.

"we called this number," the hotel employee recited a number that wasn't yours or satoru's.

"it's yaga-sensei's phone number." satoru said as he recognized the number.

the hotel employee apologized, "i'm sorry. will one bed do? we can refund you the cost of the two beds. or we can give you two separate rooms."

"ummm—" you bit your lip in hesitation. you weren't sure what to say. even though you and satoru shared your bed last week, would it be okay for you two to do this again? should you get an separate room instead and ask for reimbursement from jujutsu high later?

"that's fine. we'll just take the single bed. no need to make a huge fuss out of it." satoru replied back to the hotel employee with a wink. the employee handed him the room key and bowed to the both of you, appreciating your understanding.

as satoru led the way to the hotel room, your face started to fill with worry. were you really supposed to share a bed with satoru tonight? you were already so embarrassed about what happened last week in your dorm room. how could this happen?

satoru stopped in front of the room, unlocking the door with the room key and opening the door to enter. there was the dreaded single queen sized bed, an arm chair in the corner, and a tv sitting on top of the large dresser. not only did you have to share a bed with satoru, you had to share a bathroom too?

'could this mission get any worse?' you thought to yourself.

"you can take the bed. i'll sleep in the arm chair." satoru said nonchalantly.

"are you sure? i can sleep in the chair. i'm smaller than you." you said. by a whole foot, to be exact.

satoru feigned chivalry, "my grams would kill me if i did such an un-gentlemanly thing."

"i'll have to thank your grandma one day." you said with a giggle. "you take the shower first then."

"don't gotta tell me twice." satoru sang. he loved hot showers. he would always fight for who would get to shower first back at the dorms. satoru set down both of your backpacks and dug for his clothes and toiletries.

*****************************

you sat in the arm chair that satoru was going to be sleeping on. it was uncomfortable and barely had any cushion. was he really going to sleep on this? you felt guiltier and guiltier the more you sat in this chair. you ordered extra pillows and blankets from room service in hopes that it would help provide some comfort for him tonight.

you spent time reading over the mission details, twirling your long black hair between your fingers. you heard the bathroom door open, steam flowing out of the bathroom. satoru stepped out, tousling his damp hair. he was wearing gym shorts and a t-shirt.

"your turn." he motioned for you to hit the shower.

you teased him, "i hope you didn't take all the hot water."

"i saved some for you, princess." he shot back with a grin.

you quickly grabbed your clothes and toiletries, closing the door behind you. back at the school, the community showers were separated by women and men. sitting outside this bathroom door was satoru gojo, and that made your heart race.

while you showered, you wondered what satoru was thinking about right now. you thought about the subway ride and how he listened to your father’s favorite songs with you. you thought about how you actually wanted to hold his hand, even though you lied and told him no. and lastly, you thought about your feelings for satoru... they were growing day by day. did he feel the same way about you?

after your shower, you blew dry your hair (it always took a long time since it was so long), did your skincare routine, and brushed your teeth. you changed into a baggy long sleeve shirt and pajama shorts. you flipped off the bathroom light, finding satoru curled up in the arm chair with the extra pillows and blankets you ordered for him. he was trying his best to sleep in the unbearably cramped chair that was clearly not made for men over six feet tall.

"goodnight, satoru." you said, climbing into the bed. you frowned while looking at him. your heart shattered at the poor sight.

"night, (y/n)." he replied, eyes closed, brows furrowed. he was clearly miserable.

*****************************

you tossed and turned for the last hour. you couldn't sleep. you watched satoru sleep in the arm chair—or tried to sleep in the arm chair. he had adjusted his freakishly tall body so that he could lay upright. he said he wanted to be a gentleman and let you sleep on the bed, but you still felt guilt-ridden.

“satoru.” you whispered his name. no answer came from him. you tried calling his name again, a little louder this time, “satoru gojo.”

he opened one eye, squinting at you with his arms folded against his chest. “what do you want, (y/n)? i'm trying to sleep.” he asked you, voice groggy and laced with a hint of annoyance.

kissing the back of your teeth, you got out of the bed and stomped over to him, grabbing his hand and pulling him off the chair towards you and the damn hotel bed. satoru raised his eyebrows.

“i like women who take the lead.” he joked while rubbing the sleepiness away from his face.

you shot him a glare, “shut up—i just feel bad that you’re sleeping on the chair when this bed can clearly fit two people…” you trailed off awkwardly, avoiding eye contact with him. you felt your cheeks turning cherry red, thankful that it was dark so that satoru couldn’t see your blushing face.

satoru smiled at you, his hand scratching the back of his undercut. you were still holding his hand—and honestly? he hoped that you wouldn't let go.

“just keep your hands to yourself this time.” you muttered as you quickly let go of his hand, still embarrassed from the events of last week. deep down, you secretly hoped he wouldn't listen to you.

he gave you his signature shit eating grin and saluted you, “yes ma’am.”

the next morning

your alarm rang at 7am. you and satoru had to be at the department store lot by 9am. 2 hours would give you enough time to get ready and grab breakfast downstairs.

you yawned as you turned into a bare, broad chest. your head resting on a strong right bicep. your eyes widened, your hand came up to cover your mouth. '

damn it, not again!', you cursed yourself.

"glad we were able to do this again." satoru greeted you in reference from his statement last week, his eyes still closed. he felt you wake up when you turned into his chest just moments ago.

"ugh, satoru gojo! what did i say about keeping your hands to yourself?!" you hissed at him.

"i kept my hands to myself. you're the one who cuddled up right next to me and then attempted to use my arm as a pillow. as a gentleman, i couldn’t not let you use my arm as a pillow." he sat up, dramatically rotating his arm from having its' circulation cut off. "ugh, i have dead arm now from your big head."

"hey, i don't have a big head!" you threw your pillow at him, only for it to hit his infinity.

satoru's frosty white bedhead caught your attention. it was so unfair how statuesque he looked in the mornings. you felt like you looked like a troll doll compared to him.

"do you always have to take off your shirt in the middle of the night? or do you only do this when you get a chance to sleep next to me?" you questioned him with a strong but sleepy glare from your emerald green eyes.

satoru slyly admitted, "it gets hot at night. especially when you're cuddling."

"i never asked you to cuddle me, so you didn't have to take off your shirt." you retorted.

"well, i don’t think i can ever sleep alone anymore. having a personal heater is nice, especially during the cold winter months.” satoru sarcastically teased. sleeping next to you was something he could definitely get used to, even if it wasn't cold.

you folded your arms and looked away from him, “well, you’re going to have to get used to sleeping alone again when we get back to jujutsu high. you’re not my boyfriend so you can't just sleep next to me whenever you want.”

satoru leaned in towards you, grabbing your arm. he asked in a lower tone, sending shivers down your spine, “can i be your boyfriend then?”

“no.” you quickly answered before flicking his forehead.

satoru winced and palmed his forehead, chuckling as he watched you get out of bed to dash to the bathroom in embarrassment.

EXTRA:

you were in your dorm room writing your post-mission report for yaga-sensei that was due in the morning, your pencil scribbling and scrabbling as you watched the snow fall outside your window. you were unknowingly tracing hearts on your paper.

you thought about how satoru always made you feel so shy ever since you came to jujutsu high. as a matter of fact, your heart never failed to race around him. you couldn’t tell if he liked you or not—or if he just flirted with every girl like that. you could feel your heart opening up to the white haired sorcerer with each passing moment you spent with him. this last mission didn't help either as you spent a close proximity with him at all times.

love. something you never thought you’d find here at jujutsu high, especially with satoru gojo. was love really possible between you and him? no way. satoru was... well—he was the satoru gojo. why would he want to be with someone like you? a sorcerer who couldn't even control her own powers, someone who could barely fight in close combat, someone so weak... you beat yourself up over your flaws, not knowing that somebody else might love you despite them.

you heard four knocks on your door. it was well past curfew, who would be knocking at your door this late? maybe shoko needed to borrow your pre-calculus notes? knowing her, she was usually up late studying.

you got up from your desk and tightened your robe. you opened your dorm room door to find satoru gojo standing in front of you—speak of the handsome devil.

“w-what are you doing here? it's past c-curfew.” you stammered, feeling a flush fill your cheeks. you didn't want satoru to know you were just thinking of him. he would never let you live it down.

he gave you a sheepish look, scratching the back of his head like he always did when he was nervous. “can i spend the night?”

you stared at him for a moment. was satoru gojo really asking to spend another night with you? he gave you his signature grin in hopes that you’d let him into your room—and maybe into your heart one day.

you rolled your pretty green eyes and sighed, “fine... only because it's cold tonight.”

you opened the door for him to enter your room. satoru snuck by you and quickly jumped onto your very comfortable king sized bed, getting under the covers before you changed your mind and kicked him out.

“—and keep your hands to yourself.” you reminded him again as you walked towards him.

“no promises, sweetheart.” he cheekily retorted as he laced his fingers with yours to pull you into your own bed. you plopped down next to him.

“want an arm pillow?” he asked softly. looking over to see your pretty face that he couldn’t stop thinking about. he’d gladly wake up with dead arm in the morning if that’s what it took to sleep next to you every night.

you shyly replied, “yes, please.”

satoru gave you his right arm as you snuggled up next to him, laying your head on his bicep. he curled his arm against your back and pressed you against his side. you could hear his heart beating rapidly. was it possible that he could hear yours too?

“(y/n)?” he called out your name, interrupting your sweet thoughts.

“yes, satoru?”

“do you like suguru more than me?”

you groaned, “god—satoru, go to sleep.”

he squeezed you tightly in hopes of hearing what he wanted you to say, “answer the question.”

“yes, i totally like suguru more than you.” you lied as you sighed in disbelief, “satoru, you’re literally sleeping right next to me for a third time since we met over a month ago. make it make sense, please.”

you could sense that satoru had his signature shit eating grin on his face. “alright, (y/n). just making sure.”

and in that moment, you thought that maybe love was possible with satoru gojo.

© 2023 ASDFGHJKLMALS — ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. PLEASE DO NOT COPY, TRANSLATE, OR REPOST MY WORK.

DIVIDERS PROVIDED BY @/ANLIAN-AISHANG

[eatommo]

Kisses of Fire [j.m.]

Summary: You and Joel get caught up in a champagne-filled domestic dream, and your impulses are too strong to resist. Aka, you and Joel sing and dance in the kitchen until you can't deny your feelings any longer.

C.w: slight dub con because of alcohol consumption, mentions of parental loss, age gap (reader is in her 20s), unprotected pinv, lots of praise, pet names, Joel is a sweet talker, fluffy dancing and cooking with Joel, size kink?, creampie, squirting, oral sex (f receive), mentions of oral sex (m receive), breeding kink if you squint, mutual pining?, idk I probably missed some let me know!

A/n: Hello! I am alive! I started a new job and it's been pretty crazy but I am pleased to bring you my first Joel Miller fic and my first contribution to the Dbf!joel subgenre that has been one my favorites lately. enjoy!

~3.5k

“Joel, the sauce is going to burn.” you stumble through a laugh, trying to focus the little clarity of your mind on the chicken browning in your ceramic pan. He had insisted on opening a glass of champagne to congratulate you on your new job. It was sweet and dry, exactly what you liked, and it went down easy.

You were sitting around the coffee table gushing and hardly letting the man get a word out, and then he asked if you were hungry, and well you hadn't yet eaten and with your stomach growling at his words, he was very insistent.

In truth, you'd always looked out for each other, you'd help pick up Sarah from school, on occasion try new recipes in his much larger kitchen, and in turn, he'd fix your sink leak, install a new shower head, or even build you a new coffee table.

Here standing in his kitchen you felt so comfortable, stirring the pasta with one hand and rummaging through his cabinets for oregano with the other. It could've been the alcohol or the decade-long crush on the older man that was driving you wild.

With a rush of melody, you realized where he disappeared as the fun rhythmic beat of Be My Baby echoes through the living room and into the kitchen. Joel's words barely call above the song, “Oldies okay?”

You turn to answer him, only to catch him jamming out to the song behind you as he strides cool as a cucumber back into the kitchen. “More than okay.” You’re beaming, enjoying the music and the laid-back demeanor of his slight dance and groove.

You've cherished the few moments of joy since your father passed away a few years ago, singing with him and Sarah in the car, bullying Joel onto a rollercoaster, and summertime BBQs complete with movie marathons.

This felt different. Not only was Sarah noticeably absent, but there was an electric hum of something between you, it was almost palpable. Chalking it up to the alcohol, you settle back into your rhythm of taking care of the food in front of you with extra sway to your hips and occasionally singing into the wooden spoon like a microphone.

Joel returns to your side, stirring the thick sauce before grabbing a spoon from a drawer and tasting it. He moans around the cheap metal, throwing his head back in exaggerated ecstasy.

Hoping the heat from the stove disguises your blush, you carefully accept a spoonful he offers you after he cools with a few quick purses of his lips, humming in agreement.

“What did you say this recipe was called?” When he's been drinking, his Texan drawl lengthens, and you swallow around the lump in your throat, lord have mercy.

“Marry me chicken? It's said to get a man to marry you on its own…” you try and let your voice trail off as he grabs a colander and begins to strain the noodles for you, and before you can think you add, “I thought it would be good practice.”

You catch something in his face as he looks toward you, now mouthing the words to a song by Simon and Garfunkel, but your brain is a little too fuzzy to dissect it completely. Turning off the heat, you quickly add bacon and parmesan before tossing the chicken and sauce mixture on top of Joel's freshly strained pasta.

He hovers over you like he hasn't eaten for days, grumbling something about sweet torture as you garnish his bowl with freshly grated cheese. Turning your attention to the table you see a second bottle of champagne adorning a small dining set, and your flukes full and awaiting your attention, and your blush returns, what is happening to you?

Dismissing himself to turn the music lower, you set his plate down and settle into your chair beside his. Briefly, you consider refusing another glass, you were supposed to drive home, but his slightly tousled curls and the nonplussed smirk on his face as he walks into your field of vision wash over your body like a cool shower on a hot Austin evening, refreshing, revitalizing, and rewarding you with his simplistic beauty.

The way his eyes fell to yours with each silly verse, speaking to each moment you’ve swooned over him in private and cementing the swell of your heart. He sits and you both immediately dive into the food, moaning in unison at the salty and creamy flavor. “I get it.”

“For sure.” You confirm, shoveling more into your mouth as delicately as you can in your haste. “I’ll keep it in my back pocket for sure.” You both laugh and reach for your champagne for a toast.

“To the luckiest man in the world.” This time, he does a piss poor job of covering his shock, and you don’t dare let the moment slip from your grasp, setting your fork down, and reaching to settle your hand on his forearm, tenderly running your fingers over the rough-tanned skin.

The affection seems to coach a weight from his shoulders, as the tension in them drops and he meets your eyes with a deep and wicked sense of playfulness. Holding his gaze, and touching the lips of the flukes together you smile innocently, and hum as the cool bubbles coat your tongue and lift your confidence higher with every passing moment.

In a flash you feel the energy in the room shift, as silence flirtatious eye contact is shared between smaller sips of champagne and groans of delight, you find your eyes lingering longer on the base of his throat and the purse of his lips around the tip of the glass.

In your stupor you miss his devilish grin, he’s chasing the feeling of your gaze on his skin, drinking in the slip of your guard, and suddenly the incredible food you prepared for him is not nearly enough to sate him.

It’s his turn to stare, watching as your lips part in a soft pant as he takes a lingering swig from his glass, imagining how delicious this could pair with the taste of your pussy. Fuck, he’s so hopeless, you could talk him into anything, yet you sit and torture yourself undressing him with your eyes and practically projecting your dirty thoughts onto his chest.

When your eyes meet again your breath catches in your throat, some snarky comment you bury beneath the burning fire on your cheeks. “Joel…” it’s an invitation, a plea, and your heart stands still in its cage in the breath between your words and his mouth on yours.

His beard and moustache are rough against your lips, but the kiss is hungry, and not nearly as vulnerable as you feel. It's a clash of tongues and teeth, your bodies are drawn together like the world is stitching them together with desperate rough movements.

You can taste the rich sweet champagne on his tongue as it drags over yours, tilting your head back with a soft hand on your throat. Standing to his feet, he breaks the kiss with a reluctance you feel, but he’s ushering the plates off the table in a single trip, setting them on the counter to be dealt with later. The complaint dies in your throat, as you let your brain devour him in a primal sense. The broad expanse of his chest rising and falling in heavy needy breath, the veins in his neck as he tilts his head to return the same hungry stare, you don’t make it past his biceps before his hands are on your sides, directing you to stand but only for a mere second as your practically lifted onto the kitchen table.

His mouth is on yours again, hot and determined, your mind is made up, and he can feel it in each little whine he swallows. Confidence surges through him, bolstered by the hum of alcohol in his system, and he leans over you guiding you to your back, while he slots himself between your legs.

You part them quickly, wanting to feel him pressed against you more than you want to breathe, and rather than following you he kisses down the smooth skin of your calves and begins working on the button of your shorts, yanking them up and off with a dexterity that would surprise you had it been anyone else.

The thin cotton panties are not your first choice of sexy intimates, but it doesn’t seem to phase him as his gaze holds at the growing wet spot pooling in the fabric. His index fingers ghost over the seam of your pussy. “Are you sure?” He kisses the words across your skin, moving along the inside of your thighs as his stubble draws the nerves in your skin taught.

You blink your eyes a few times, almost not believing and basking in the warmth of his breath. Your mouth falls open in a pant as you throw your head back onto the table, in any other circumstance it would've hurt. “Yes…Joel…please.” Each word takes a lungful of air worth of effort.

There's a dark chuckle as if taunting you for being so pathetic, as he nibbles on the skin of your inner thigh, you feel goosebumps spread across all your skin, unaware if it's from shame or the heat of his mouth muttering sweet nothings into your skin.

“So pretty,” he coos letting two fingers trace over your slick panties, “Spread out on my table for me,” he presses harder but slows his movements to a beautifully slow taunt, “A fucking meal.”

The chair moves sharply back with his movement, as he pulls your underwear to the side and licks at your hole for his first taste. His mouth is feverish in appetite, licking and sucking and caressing each part of your sex, the assault is overwhelming at first, the movements so erratic you’re unable to focus on anything but trying to breathe. Cantering your hips against his mouth his rough palm stalls one of your thighs from closing, the hand is firm and warm commanding you to obey in just its presence. “More,” you beg, again the pleasure dulled as he slowed to listen.

His free hand goes to the waistband of your underwear running along its length and tickling the skin, before you feel a rough tug at the fabric and hear the tearing sound before you can even comprehend what’s happened. The fabric disappears and the soft table mat you are perched on protects you from the cool wood of the table. He mumbles more things into the flesh of your mound, and he kisses at the exposed skin of your hips, “Sweet little thing.”

You throw a hand over your eyes, losing yourself to the embraces and brushes of pleasure he showers you in. He settles back between your legs, pinning them to your chest with his arm and working two fingers slowly into your tight heat. The stretch is pleasant, and he lets his tongue lave over the top of your sex. “Joel.” You whimper feeling his knuckles curl inwards brushing against a bundle of nerves that has your vision lulling white. Each stroke feels like it's pulling your soul from your body, and an unfamiliar pressure builds as he coaxes the orgasm to the surface with his tongue swirling over your clit.

You explode, soaking the table and his hungry waiting mouth feeling the clear gush of liquid pool beneath you and coat your thighs. “Oh god, I’m sorry I-” you stammer, not having experienced this yourself before.

Joel’s attention snaps to your eyes, “Don’t.” It's a warning, his eyes dark and muddled with something animalistic you’ve only seen when he’s angry. “You’re going to do it again.” he sits straight, and you realize he’s still fully dressed as he stands on his feet, dwarfing you against the table, undoing the length of his belt.

Unsure if your breathing is coming fast or if he is moving slowly, undoing the buttons of his flannel, and exposing skin that you’ve seen countless times before, but as each button is freed and his shirt spills open, you struggle to keep your breath even. Thick tanned skin, soft to the touch but cords of practical muscle run through his pecks, and down his well-defined biceps hold your eyes still, as your heart clips away steadily. You mumble something about his muscles, fawning over him like you’ve done so many times before, but unafraid to get caught this time.

He peers down at you, maintaining eye contact through your spread thighs as you lay waiting gawking at him like you always have, the loose leather of his belt is tugging the jeans down his hips slightly exposing the soft flesh of his stomach and the feather-light trail of hair disappearing below his jeans. He longed to reduce you to a babbling drooling mess, he wanted to mark your skin his and fill you so full his traces would linger on your cunt for days. Days, he knew it wouldn’t be easy to stop, he felt like he was running downhill and his legs were jelly beneath him, hurtling towards some sort of self-destructive meltdown. But the sweet tang of you lingering in his mouth, splashed across his chest, on his dining room table.

You were perfect, even more so than he thought possible. He ached, the jeans strangling his thick cock, he longed to free himself and sink into you. “Come here.” he stepped closer, back between the welcome squeeze of your thighs, and he wondered if he would need a new table.

You sat up barely even with his chest and when you're close enough he brings you in for a deep and filthy kiss, giving you a chance to taste your slick from his tongue and to groan as your hand settles over the hard length of his cock in his pants. You allow a finger to trace over the outline surprised when your hand keeps finding more of him to play with, fighting the urge to squeak in delight as each kiss grows in fervor.

If Joel hadn't suggested otherwise, you would've happily been fucked to bliss on the table, but as one of his hands falls to cup the supple flesh of your ass you're lifted into his sturdy arms. Now even this isn't a first, but your cunt is pressed flat to the ripped muscles of his abdomen and you can't help but trail feather-like kisses and nips across the thin skin covering his Adam's apple, half tempted to suck a bruise into his skin as he whines lowly into hair.

He traverses the stairs with ease, fingers squeezing and playing with your ass as he does so. As you enter his room, he leans in for another searing desperate kiss, nipping and tugging on your bottom lip almost painfully slow.

The bed is plush, more so than you expect, the sheets feel cool and inviting as you settle into them, not daring to turn your attention away from Joel for a second. The moon is the only light in the room, but it's bright enough for you to drool over the large bulge he reveals as he shucks his jeans.

“Something you want darlin?” that all-knowing chuckle, call your attention to his face, always handsome but there's a depravity and a hunger in his eyes that is a little bit intimidating.

“I-” You struggle to decide what exactly it is you want to do, part of you wants to let him lay down and have you suck his cock dry, and the other part wants to see you bent in half stuffed full of his cum.

Your stumble only brings another dry chastising chuckle, “Don’t worry honey, I'll take care of you.” His dark boxers leave little to the imagination, the fabric pulled tight across him as the curve of his cock is pinned to the curve of his hip. He’s huge, bigger than you could’ve dreamed, and by the looks of it nice and thick, you would be happily limping around in the morning.

He plants his hands next to your legs, crawling up your body until he’s even with your mouth, his skin radiating heat and his mouth meets yours once more. The taste of you is still lingering in his mouth, spurring you on.

The clothed hardness of him presses against you, insistent and delightfully relieving the tortuous pressure building at your core. You run your hands against the muscles of his back, at first gently caressing but as his teeth skim your pulse you dig into the flesh with your nails. “Joel…” you whimper, knowing if he wanted to drag this any further you'd have no choice but to beg, there's something so addictive to his power and the way he looks at you. He knows what he's doing to you, he knows the way you shift your hips to grind against him is a silent plea, he wishes he could withhold longer, but each hitch in your breath coaxes more precome spilling into his boxers, he hasn't been this hard since he was a teenager.

He hushes you, soothing you with a hand running over your hair, and shoves his boxers down to free himself. He lets the weight of his cock slide over your sex, the thick head catching deliciously on your clit and allowing it to get coated in what's left of your cum. You both groan into another kiss, “Condom?” The question shocks you into reality briefly, but you quickly shake your head no, not bothering an attempt to form any words.

You swear you hear a whimper in his half-lidded chuckle, but you try to focus on the feeling of his body pressing against yours, the heat of him and the rich smell of his skin the taste of his mouth as he kisses you through a few more lazy strokes.

He runs a calloused hand over the soft skin of your throat before sliding it around and into the hair at the back of your neck, tilting your eyes to his As he lines up and slides in a single brutal thrust. Your body tenses at the stretch, but the pleasure is immense and Joel's mouth parts in a pant so beautifully you crack a wickedly seductive smile.

As he begins to canter his hips, his grip on your hair gets tighter, holding your eyes to his, his pelvis grinds delectably against your clit, as the ridges of his cock and the angle of his hips drag along your walls. You wonder if you'd been able to take it if it hadn't been Joel, you don't think you've ever been this fucked out in your life. He presses your legs slightly further apart nudging at your cervix, and grounding down.

The orgasm rips through you before you know it, the shake in your legs and your panted obscenities only encourage him further. “Fuck, good girl,” your hips love on their own grinding up fucking yourself through the climax as a second wave of white-hot pleasure soaks his abdomen and your thighs, “So good baby.”

Your head drops, body limp and wrecked he kisses along your cheeks and forehead, giving you a moment to catch your breath.

He moves quicker than you can register what's happening, his boxers are on the floor and suddenly you are straddled over his lap dropping down onto his cock as he buries his face in your tits. Tongue drags deliciously over your nipples as he lets you adjust to the new angle, you rest your head on top of his, kissing his sweat-damp hair and rocking your hips slowly. You didn't think he could feel any bigger, each slight rock nudges almost painfully against your cervix, words no longer forming in your brain and breath escaping in squeaks.

You let yourself get caught up in the moans and praise failing out of Joel nonsensically, the drag of his stubble on your skin overstimulating, you bear down on him and shiver as you hear the hitches in his breathing. “Where?” you almost miss it, his voice is hoarse, desperate, strained even.

“Cum inside me.” you can't suppress the smirk, “I want it.” It's your turn to pull his head back, looking deep into the rich dark brown eyes as they admire you, he chews on his lip. His shoulders hunch as you feel him twitch, his grip tightening on your hips as he uses the last bit of his strength to bounce you on his lap and fuck up into you as he cums deep and hard into your wrecked swollen pussy.

You suppress a shutter, you feel like you're made of gelatin and you slump against his body, going completely slack.

He waits a few moments to collect his wits and allows you both to catch your breath. “Should I start a shower?” You laugh, hoping to skirt over any sort of rebuff.

“Sure,” he massages the flesh of your ass, “I'll take care of the leftovers.” You're overwhelmed with a sense of relief, both letting out a massive sigh at the same time, and laughing once you make eye contact again. You feel his heartbeat against your chest and lean in for another kiss, the complicated stuff can come later, but the smile he gives you as he tilts his chin up slightly for the kiss, makes you feel like it's all going to be more than you could've dreamed of.

Part 2

[juststoriesintheend]

II. The Lesson

Pairing: Master Sol x gn!Reader

Chapter Content: some light Jedi philosophy, lightsaber sparring, mutual pining, first kiss

Word Count: 2.7k

《 [series masterlist] 》 《 I 》

In an attempt to remain as cool, calm, and casual as possible, you’ve left your cloak in your room. You’d only have to take it off in the training room anyway, so you’re saving yourself the extra time and effort. Not that you’re overthinking things. At all. You’ve only re-layered your tunics and tabard half a dozen times, adjusted your belt twice that, and very nearly stepped out with only one boot. Whatever spell you had been under in Sol’s presence yesterday has completely worn off.

You arrive an hour earlier than you normally do, which is about fifteen minutes before Sol comes in with Jecki. If you remember right, Sol is done teaching the younglings by now and is off doing whatever it is he does in his spare hour between duties. While you’re a little deflated not seeing him right away, it’s for the best because his absence allows you focus and control. You can concentrate better on the saber, on your hands, on the slicing of air and the humming of the Force without him distracting you.

After some quick stretches, you unclip your saber and ignite it. The floor and nearby pillars reflect the light back to you, as well as a distorted image of your silhouette. A lifetime’s worth of muscle memory kicks in and your body is alive, thrumming with energy as your wrist twists, then your elbow, then your torso tilts and the saber swings in front, in back, in front again. Your wrist flicks and the saber swirls above your head, down behind your back, and finishes with a flourish at your side.

It feels like coming home.

Switching the saber from one hand to the other, you warm up your other side, copying your previous moments as precisely as possible even though it’s definitely your weaker side. This is the freedom you’ve been missing. You’ve been so fixated on Sol that it’s kept you away from the calm that saber work has always brought you – the repetition of the familiar, the Force as it flows through you, the shadows and highlights cast upon the walls as your saber arcs. Nothing could ever compare to this.

The saber flies into the air after you toss it. This is one of the fancier tricks you’ve seen some of the younger Knights and Padawans practicing, and you can already tell you won’t be able to catch this one properly, not without hurting yourself, so you jump back and flick the blade off with the Force. You fully expect it to clatter on the stone floor, and you’re hoping the fall doesn’t damage the casing or the kyber, but instead it… hovers.

It takes a millisecond to search the room for the source, and another to turn your head. Sol stands near the doorway with his arm outstretched, both eyes open and his face lightly furrowed in concentration. His attention flickers to you before refocusing on your saber, and it unexpectedly flies across the room into his open palm in the second it takes for you to catch your breath.

There’s something remarkably intimate about him holding this piece of you, something so vital to your being as a Jedi that you feel empty without it at your side. Still, if there were anyone you trusted to hold your saber, your very life, in their hands, you think it would be Sol. It just so happens that you also like to watch him hold it, whatever that means to the secret, affectionate creature that lives inside you.

“I’ve never seen you try that before,” he finally says. He starts for the center of the room, his gaze still focused on your saber as he rubs his thumb over the hilt.

You’re strangely breathless and you can’t understand why. “I was feeling adventurous. Saw some of the Padawans trying it the other day and, very foolishly, thought I should try it too.”

The corner of Sol’s mouth dimples into a crooked smile.

Wait, did he just say he’d never seen you try that before? He’s aware of the type of saber work you usually do? Heat blazes across your face at the realization, but Sol is too occupied to take notice, thank the Force. He continues to turn your saber over in his hand, though you’re not sure why. It isn’t so remarkably different from any other saber.

“Why did you think you would disappoint me?”

Your saber is returned, and you clip it back to your belt just to have something to do. “Well, I’m not a Master, for one thing. If I’m going to be sparring with you, I’d like to at least look like I know what I’m doing.”

“It certainly appeared that you did.”

You duck your head the moment he makes eye contact with you. Now that he’s finally here, your confidence wavers, and you know that your concentration will do the same the moment he begins to fight.

“What is it that makes you so unsure of yourself?” he asks with all the gentleness of a man who senses discouragement and knows it like the back of his own hand. “You are an accomplished dueler.”

If only he knew the magnitude of his question, he might choose to ask you something else. Huffing a breath out the side of your mouth, you start with a lazy, “Well, I–”

The air around you seems to vibrate, then electrify as Sol summons his own weapon into his hand and ignites it. He bears down upon you, and you know deep in your heart that he would never hurt you, but this knowledge does not override instinct. Your saber is in your hand without conscious thought, brandished and burning as his blade lands near the hilt. The junction where they touch burns white-hot, so starkly bright that it hurts to even look.

What are you doing? you mean to ask, but the words never come. You’re too enraptured by the flame of blue-white light reflected in his pupils to speak. How long have you spent watching him from afar, marveling at his skill, and now you find yourself on the receiving end of it? It feels unreal. It feels jagged and raw in the same way a cold wind off the sea does, exhilarating in some forbidden sense.

He retreats and you stumble back a step as your lightsaber comes to hang by your leg, still ignited but out of the way. It’s not proper form, but you’re too dazed to care. Sol spots this and advances again, giving you only the slightest margin for error as your blade comes screaming back into position to block him once, twice, three times before he backs up again.

“You react with instinct.” He begins to circle you with his blade extended toward your face. “Good.”

You feel a flash of irritation in your chest at this. While you’re certain (at least, you hope) he means well, this feels more like a Master testing his Padawan than a fellow Jedi electing to spar with you. You are not Sol’s Padawan and you’ve already fought to make your mark as a Knight, you don’t like feeling like a child again and certainly not at his hands. That’s not the kind of feeling you want from him.

“I don’t need a lesson,” you say as politely as you can, which isn’t very much at all currently.

Sol’s head tilts slightly in the way it always does when he’s considering something. “Then why am I here?”

Electric blue flashes across your vision as he slashes his way forward and you parry away. He’s not even giving you time to answer, let alone think, and you know it’s on purpose. Your Master’s used this trick on you several times, but that doesn’t mean you have to like it.

“Why am I here?” he repeats. He doesn’t even react when your blade swings past his shoulder and misses. “Why did you accept my offer?”

You swing again, agitated, and miss a second time, only to be pushed aside by an invisible hand so strong that it nearly knocks your breath from you.

“Because!”

Now that there’s some distance between you, you have a moment to think, to assess yourself, the questions he’s asking, and the answers you want to give. Sol, however, chooses not to give you that time. His arm extends, fingers splayed and palm open as that same invisible hand grasps you by the tabard and pulls. His wrist twists and you come flying into his hand like your saber had mere minutes ago. Instinct and fear kicks in again, and you find yourself forced to choose between freedom with no saber and close quarters defense in the amount of time it takes to decide to breathe.

Your saber drops to the floor, the blade disappearing into itself as you summon the Force to instead push yourself away from Sol and out of his grasp. The resulting blow is strong enough to knock you both off your feet, though you have just enough forewarning to brace yourself for impact. Cold, hard stone meets shins and knees, but you’re already up and recovering your saber. Sol isn’t far behind, but he’s clearly startled. Startled enough to have dropped his saber.

You are no Jar’Kai prodigy, and indeed, it’s been years since you’ve attempted to dual wield with any amount of seriousness, but you try now. It makes sense. It feels right. Sol’s saber is heavy in your hand, heavier and wider than yours, but it doesn’t fight you when you brandish it. His kyber sings a peculiar harmony with your own, as if they were exchanging greetings, embracing each other through the Force. It tickles in the back of your brain like a shot of spotchka.

Sol’s hand meets your wrist when you bring his blade down. The leather glove creaks under the weight of your blow, but his arm remains firm. Your other arm remains frozen mid-air as it quivers with the effort of resisting his Force. He’s got you pinned and while he can’t release you without putting himself back in danger, you can no longer land a blow on him without losing any ground. It’s a stalemate in its truest form.

You’re closer to him now than you ever have been before. His breath fans out across your face as it comes and goes in quick exhalations, and you find yourself wondering if you should’ve brushed your teeth again after lunch. If you’d known he’d be so close to you now, you would have.

“Why?” he grits through his bared teeth. “Why did you accept my offer?”

Something hotter than ice burns from your shoulder down to your wrist with the effort of fighting him. “Because I can’t focus,” you gasp. You won’t be able to hold on much longer. “Keep. Making mistakes.”

He presses his advantage until your arm shudders with enough strength to completely collapse. The saber is snagged from your hand as it drops and quickly redirected to spark somewhere near the column of your neck. There’s no real threat behind it. Sol is moments away from winning this round and your body is already tired.

“Let your instinct guide you,” he instructs, and though it burns to admit it, you know he’s right. “Don’t think. Feel.”

But that’s exactly what you don’t want to do, what you can’t do. Because to feel would mean to let the sin of your affection for him seep deeper and deeper into your bones until you can no longer draw it out like poison from a wound. To feel would be the most beautiful agony imaginable. To feel would be to dream of possibilities that can never be. You would rather not feel it at all, than to feel it and lose it in the end.

You shake your head. “I can’t.”

Sol frowns. He looks so beautiful bathed in the light of his kyber. “What are you afraid of?”

The blue saber deactivates, then your own, and the training room returns to normal, but your wrist remains trapped in the palm of Sol’s glove. He’s close enough now that the voluminous lower half of his robes fall around your knees, brushing your ankles as he adjusts his stance and leans further into you. Is this not everything you ever wanted?

“Tell me.”

And it’s the gentleness of this prompt that finally cleaves through your heart. You are, quite honestly, tired. Your heart and mind are exhausted from the burden of your guilt, from the knowledge that you are already so attached to a man you hardly know. You want to fight his inquisition, but more than that, you want to give in if only to find relief from the torment of not knowing.

With closed eyes and a trembling voice, you finally relinquish your secret. “Rejection. Abandonment.” Half-concocted visions of a future without the Jedi, without the Order or your Master or the life you’ve worked so hard to build, materialize behind your lids. All this because you tend to fall in love a little too fast? How is that fair? “Myself. I’m afraid of myself and what I could do to destroy my own life.”

Something knocks at the door to your mind. It is a familiar sensation, like the sound of boots on stone or a guiding command given between the sparking of saber blades, it burns golden-brown like the sun and the tunic on his chest, and it smells like incense from a far away planet, the incense you sometimes smell on his cloak when he passes you by. You let him in.

You think, at first, that sharing your mind with someone is a bit like a kiss. A gentle nudging of one mind against the other until both become one, pressing thoughts and feelings and vague ideas together like a mouth or tongue might go against your own. You think that it feels like the kind of intimacy you’ve always yearned for but feared you would never know. Then you realize that Sol is actually kissing you.

Shock ripples through you fast and hard enough to make your stomach simultaneously drop to the floor and catch in your throat. You can’t breathe, you can’t move, there’s only Sol and his lips and the blazing freedom of peace cutting through the noise that usually clouds your thoughts.

He withdraws far too soon, and it leaves your mouth tingling and bruised. Your eyes flutter open and are unsurprisingly met with the umber-blackened hue of his pupils. So close. So real. His chest heaves with the effort of… what, exactly? Does he suffer from the same strange side effect as you, the unimaginable urge to kiss him again and delve even deeper? Is he fighting to restrain himself as much as you are?

“I feel it, too,” he whispers, and his eyes drop to your tongue as it darts across the seam of your mouth.

“What?” You don’t even dare to dream, but what if…?

Sol swallows heavily. “The pull. You feel it like I do?”

The hand not grasping his lightsaber drops lazily against his sternum as you both shuffle awkwardly into more normal, non-battle stances. “I do,” you reply. “I have. For a long time.”

There is a soft rustling of fabric and breath as Sol takes a moment to clip your saber back to your belt – the feel of his fingers, even through his gloves, lingering on your belt will stick with you forever – and to gently pry his from your hand. Then he reaches for your shoulder and lays his hand there, his thumb rubbing a semi-circle into your collarbone.

“Is this what you were afraid of? That I would not return your feelings?”

The ease with which he sees through your carefully constructed walls before completely blowing them to pieces is startling. Not even your Master is quite this forward with you. It’s different, to be sure, yet oddly refreshing.

“Among other things,” is your bashful response, half murmured to the space above his shoulder.

“We must have the courage to say what we want, even if we are afraid.” His hand resettles upon your cheek and your breath rushes out of you in an instant. All you can think is Sol Sol Sol Sol Sol, the only prayer you’ll ever need. “Are you afraid now?”

“No.”

“Then… I would like to kiss you again.”

When he smiles, you feel it curling up around your heart, a string that ties you to him, first knotted when he summoned your saber into his hand and now finished with a kiss.

taglist: @wolffegirlsunite

[punkshort]

Chapter warnings: language, violence, angst

A/N: this chapter might be a little slower than the rest, but I felt like it was important to establish how they are surviving. I tried to keep it spicy and interesting but please stay with me, I believe I have some great stuff coming up :)

Chapter Ten

Pairing: Joel x F!Reader, pre-outbreak and post outbreak

AU (the only thing I kept was the outbreak, Joel, and Tommy's characters. Joel's backstory is different, and the way he finds Jackson is different. I may include Ellie one day, I just haven't planned that far)

Fic Summary: You worked for Joel and Tommy a few months before the outbreak. The outbreak happens, and you and Joel get stuck traveling the country and keeping each other safe. Neither of you spoke about the feelings you had for one another pre-outbreak, and in a post-apocalyptic world, it seems like survival should be your only focus. But feelings can't be ignored forever.

Fic tags: Explicit Smut (18+ MDNI), Smut, Language, Canon-Typical Violence, Alcohol Use, Age Difference (Reader is 10 years younger than Joel), slow burn, mutual pining, angst, trauma, SA referencing later but I will put a big warning on those chapters

October 2003

Pittsburgh, PA

It had taken you nearly a full month to make it 400 miles, having to stop frequently and rest for a couple days here and there, but you were halfway to Chicago. Your bodies were not used to the constant exercise, and it required you to rest more than you expected. Joel suspected you were both deficient in some capacity since all you had eaten was canned and processed food for a month and exerting much more energy than normal. You were holed up in a small cabin outside of Pittsburgh, about 10 miles away from reaching the city. Joel had broken into the cabin late last night, and the two of you collapsed into bed once he confirmed the place was empty. He had planned to stay here for a couple days, wanting to make sure you were both as well rested as possible.

The next morning, Joel was looking around the small basement of the cabin, his flashlight bouncing off the dirty concrete walls while you went through the clothes left in the dressers upstairs, determining which ones were suitable to swap out. With winter fast approaching, you both needed to find clothes with longer sleeves and extra layers.

His flashlight scanned over a rusted metal shelving unit in the far corner. He walked over to inspect the items, finding mostly cleaning products, insect repellant, paint, and other chemicals. At the very bottom he found a hunting trap which he picked up to examine, pleasantly surprised to find it was still functional. He took it upstairs and placed it on the small kitchen table, then went to find you in the bedroom, where he heard you opening and shutting the dresser drawers.

The queen bed was covered in clothes, women's clothes on the right and men's on the left. On the floor you had tossed three well-worn hunting jackets, and on the other side of the room was a pile of discarded clothes that looked like they were meant for warmer months.

"Makin’ some progress up here?” he asked, bending down to take a closer look at the jackets and opening the pockets to see what was left behind. He triumphantly pulled out a few batteries and a lighter, shoving them in his jeans pocket. He picked the jacket up and shook the dust off before trying it on.

"Yeah, we got some good options. I think the guy's clothes will fit you, her clothes will be a little baggy on me but that's fine, I can do layers," you said over your shoulder as you scooped up loose socks from the top drawer and tossed them on the bed, getting to work matching and rolling them up. "Did you find anything useful?"

Joel put the jacket back on the floor and picked up a second one, trying that one on before settling on the third, which was a little big on him, but the thick leather kept him well insulated. "Yeah, actually, I found a hunting trap. I'm gonna go out a little ways and see if we can catch somethin', I think we need more protein, we've been needin' to take too many breaks lately."

"You want me to come with you?" you stood up after matching up the last pair of socks.

"Nah, I won't be long, you keep workin' on this stuff here." Joel grabbed his rifle and the trap, closing the front door behind him and setting out into the woods.

The cabin was surrounded by a thick forest but there were a few trails that must have been forged by deer given how tall the grass and narrow the paths were. Joel walked carefully into the trees, staying alert for any threats. Out this far into the wilderness, infected weren't the problem. The pair of you hadn't come across any more people since that night in his apartment a month ago but he made sure you stayed off the roads as much as possible. You weren't as quiet or withdrawn anymore, but he noticed you were becoming hardened by the world you were forced to live in. He had seen the slow progression as you both learned how to take down infected as efficiently as possible. He remembered when you first had to do it: you were so scared he could see the switchblade shaking in your hand as you snuck up behind a dormant runner. As the weeks went on and you practiced more, you became more comfortable taking them down, but he also saw the hardness growing in your eyes. He knew it was just a product of your environment and it was essential in order to survive, but some nights when he was unable to sleep, he laid awake and imagined a world where he could be a shield for you, taking all damage, and you could be your warm and sweet self again, safe under his protection.

Being out in the wild without the comfort of an apartment helped quell his feelings for you a little. He was less distracted when he had to always be on high alert, forcing his thoughts off you and onto survival. But whenever you stayed in a safe spot for a few days, like this cabin, he eventually found his thoughts wandering back to how soft your lips were against his that night, the curve of your hips in your dress, or the way you moaned into his mouth. The forced proximity and the illusion of safety usually meant his body ended up finding yours in the middle of the night and pulled you close to him. You never mentioned it, and neither did he, but he knew it was a byproduct of trying to stamp out his feelings for you. It was almost like his mind was saying one thing, but his body was refusing to obey. So, whenever he woke and found himself tangled in you once again, he didn’t allow himself to savor the moment and quickly removed himself from you before his heart swelled and he would be lost in you all over again.

It was about a ten minute walk from the cabin before Joel found a good spot to place the trap. It was near a big bush that looked to be home to some kind of animal based on the prints in the dirt. He took a pink scarf out of his pocket and ripped a piece off, tying it to the tree branch above the trap. As he followed his footsteps back, every minute or so he tore another piece off and tied it to a branch until he reached the cabin. He pushed the door open and set the rifle down by the door. He heard you singing softly to yourself in the bedroom, completely unaware he had entered the cabin. The first instinct he had was to chastise you for not being more aware of your surroundings, but the part of him that was desperate to protect you ultimately won, and instead he stood in the kitchen to listen.

You left the bedroom with an armful of rags you had made from the summer clothes in the corner, lyrics softly leaving your lips when you saw Joel standing there and yelped out of fright.

“Jesus, Joel, you scared the shit out of me!” you exclaimed before taking your pile of rags to the couch and setting them down. “How long were you standing there?”

“Just walked in a minute ago,” he replied, giving you a small smirk. “Found a good spot for the trap, I’ll check it before sundown. Maybe we’ll get lucky.” He shrugged the hunting jacket off and draped it over a chair.

You nodded and headed over to the cupboard to see what the previous residents left behind.

“Are you hungry? We have some soup here, and some canned stew. What do you want?” You turned to face him with your hand on your hip, but his gaze seemed unfocused and his thoughts far away at your question. Moments like this felt so domestic and it made him ache. What did he want? He wanted everything you had to offer. He wanted to turn back time and take back what he said to you, before he ruined everything. He wanted domestic bliss where you made him dinner and he had you for dessert. He didn’t want to be fighting for your lives while you ate expired Dinty Moore.

His gaze refocused on you and replied, “I’ll take the soup.” He reached into his jeans pocket and found the lighter from earlier and got to work setting up a small fire outside while you rummaged around for pots to heat up the canned delicacies that awaited you.

Joel had just left to check the trap before it got too dark, and you were left scrubbing the pots in the sink until your fingers felt raw. You dreaded any time he left. You hated being away from him, and not because you were scared, it was something more. You figured it out when one morning about a week ago you woke up wrapped in his arms again, for maybe the third time, but that morning was when you realized you only truly slept well when he sought you out in the middle of the night to pull you close and breathe you in. You were always disappointed when he woke up and pulled away from you so fast, leaving you feeling ashamed for being the only one who wanted it to continue. You had to constantly remind yourself it meant nothing, that Joel only had wanted one thing from you by replaying how mad he got for not sleeping with him that night. He never apologized for it, and you know you shouldn’t care anymore, but sometimes when you let your thoughts wander, it bothered you.

You put the pots back in the cupboard and raked your fingers through your hair aggressively, looking out the window to see if you could spot him. You hadn’t had any moments between you like that day in the subway when you saw the heat behind his gaze as you ran your hand up his arm. You convinced yourself afterwards that you had misread the situation, that the look in his eyes was not one of passion, but one of disapproval, and the embarrassment for the way you behaved sat with you for the next week. Eventually, the embarrassment faded when your focus was redirected to surviving in the wild and learning how to take down infected. You were both becoming pretty good at it, so long as you had the upper hand and noticed them first. Only twice did Joel have to use a gun to take one down, so your ammo reserve was still well stocked. But there was something feral that triggered inside you when you watched him kill: the little curl his upper lip made when he made contact, the fire in his eyes when the adrenaline kicked in, the way the muscles in his arms moved from the force of piercing a knife through their skulls. There had to be something wrong with you, nobody should find something like that attractive.

You heard his boots walking up the small porch, but you put your hand on your gun, just in case you were wrong. He opened the door, smiling proudly and holding up a dead rabbit to show you, and set the rifle back down in the corner by the door.

“I’ll go skin it, get it prepped for later. We can finally have a real meal for dinner.” Joel said, still holding the rabbit in his hand. “What’s wrong?” he asked, his smile faltering a bit when he noticed your expression seemed a little distant. You shook your head and smiled.

“Nothing, I’m fine, just distracted today,” you assured him, then turned around to find a small bag of rice you had seen next to the soup earlier. “I’ll make this to eat with dinner.” You plopped it down on the counter and went back to the bedroom to review the clothes you had set aside. Joel’s eyes followed you until you disappeared around the corner. He could tell something was wrong, but he knew better than to push it.

Joel was right about needing more protein and rest. You both felt recharged after just two nights but allowed yourselves the luxury of one more night indoors before heading off towards Pittsburgh. The morning you planned to leave was when Joel had let his guard down and you awoke entwined with him again. It was early, the sun hadn’t even risen yet. You knew the longer you let him do this, the more hurt you would ultimately inflict upon yourself, but as hard as you tried you just could not bring yourself to be the one to end the embrace. So, you squeezed your eyes shut and willed yourself back to sleep.

Joel stirred when the sun shone into his eyes through the thin curtains, squinting and yawning. As usual, he detached himself from you quickly, frustrated with his subconscious once again. After using the bathroom, he went outside to start a fire. The air was crisp and there was a sharp autumn wind that took his breath away. He huddled in his new jacket and shifted from foot to foot as he waited for the fire to flare up. He looked up into the sky, trying to detect if any rain would be heading your way, but the forest blocked most of his view. He heard the cabin door swing shut and twisted around to watch you walk down the steps wrapped in one of the other hunting jackets and carrying a kettle in one hand and the jar of instant coffee in another. He reached out to take the items from you so you could go back inside and grab two mugs and a spoon. He sat down on one of the thick logs used for stools that were surrounding the firepit and waited for the water to boil. You came back out with the mugs but also had a couple bowls and packets of instant oatmeal.

“’Morning,” you greeted groggily, setting the items down on one of the empty logs and choosing a spot next to him. You yawned, looking around the forest and buried your face in your coat when the wind picked up.

“Sleep ok?” Joel asked you, knowing full well he was setting you up to ask about the way he woke up clutching you, but much to his relief, it seemed as though that topic was never brought up.

You nodded, saying, “Yeah, better than usual.” And left it at that.

Neither of you were morning people and generally didn’t speak much until coffee hit your system. You had been lucky so far and found reserves of it at most of the places you stopped, but you had to dip into the stash from your apartment when you made camp in the forest. You sipped your coffee and ate your oatmeal in silence.

“Next time we find a sporting goods store, we oughta look for a bow and arrow, somethin’ silent,” Joel mused as he scraped his bowl. “We should learn to hunt out here. With winter comin’, it would be a good skill to have.”

You agreed, grabbing both bowls and the kettle while he picked up the mugs and snuffed out the fire. It was probably pointless, but you cleaned your dishes and put them back. It was unlikely the owners of this cabin would find it again, but it just felt wrong to leave things messy. This cabin provided for you both when you needed it and keeping it clean and in its original condition felt like the best way to thank it.

After breakfast, you packed up all your new clothes and replenished any food and rags you could fit in your packs and headed back out on the trail towards Pittsburgh. The forest was thick and lush, and offered a lot of cover, so you were able to make decent time getting to the city, arriving in the early afternoon. You approached a cliffside, stopping there to eat lunch and rest for the first time since you left the cabin. Joel didn’t want to start a fire and attract attention, so you ate some granola bars, peanuts and shared a can of peaches while you surveyed the city in the distance.

“So, what’s the plan?” you asked him, taking a sip from your canteen.

“Well,” he began, shoving the wrappers from the granola bars into his backpack, “I figure we should steer clear of the city proper best we can, especially the QZ. They won’t ask questions; they’ll just shoot on sight if they see anyone.”

You looked up at the sun in the sky, trying to determine the time. “We will have to find somewhere in the city that’s quiet, we won’t make it through before sundown.” You told him, looking back from the sky to meet his gaze. He nodded, impressed.

“Yep, you’re exactly right. Good girl.” he said, the compliment making you flush. “If we stick to the outskirts, maybe we can find a small shop or somethin’. But we’re gonna have to take turns takin’ watch, I don’t trust bein’ this close to soldiers.” he warned you, and you nodded in understanding. After you had spent a few minutes resting, Joel stood up, checking his revolver and tucking it back into his pants and zipping his backpack closed. You followed suit, shoving a rag back into your pack that you used to wipe some sweat off your forehead, and you both soldiered on towards the city.

It was approaching dusk as you and Joel finished clearing out a gas station in a quiet part of the city. There were only three runners inside, and you made quick work of taking them down silently. You helped Joel drag the last body into the men's bathroom, closing the door behind you. Joel wasn't thrilled with the building: it was filled with huge broken windows and left you too exposed for his liking, but the sun was waning, and your choices were limited. There was a small office tucked in the corner that you had emptied of the rolling desk chair and a few boxes of receipts so you could spread out your sleeping bag on the floor. Joel insisted on taking first watch, and you propped the door to the office open with one of the boxes so you could hear if there was any trouble before tucking yourself in.

Joel sat on the rolling chair by the front door, hiding in the darkness behind an aisle, every so often standing in a crouch to glance out the large windows for any movement. He was getting tired, but he still had a couple more hours left on his watch before he woke you. In an effort to keep him awake, he wandered over to the small electronics section behind the cash register, perusing the items on the shelves. His gaze settled on a Timex analog watch. He pried open the package and attached it to his wrist, adjusting the time to match the clock on the wall, assuming it was correct before sitting back down in the chair.

You had about 20 minutes left before he planned to wake you up. Joel was just finishing some beef jerky when he saw flashlights bouncing off a building about a block away. He straightened up in his chair, tossing the bag of jerky to the side, and hoisted the rifle onto his shoulder so he could see through his scope. He watched behind the aisle as a group of four men walked down the street in the direction of the gas station. He could see they were armed, noting knives in their boots, pistols holstered at their hips and two of them held military grade assault rifles. As they came into view, Joel scanned their clothes for any type of military insignia but found none. How did they get those assault rifles?

They were getting closer, but Joel still couldn’t tell if they were planning on entering the gas station or if they were just passing through. His hands began to sweat as he gripped his rifle tighter, his body tense and ready to strike. They were about 50 yards away when one of the men laughed at something one of the others said. The rest immediately shushed him, but it was too late. They froze as an unfamiliar noise echoed through the air from a dumpster they had passed half a block ago. Joel frowned, unable to identify the noise, but based on the reactions of the men, they knew. They whipped around, their backs now to the gas station, all four aiming their guns in the direction of the noise. It sounded like a high-pitched screech mixed with a gasp, then a distinct click, click, click. He heard one of the men swear under his breath, his voice sounding shaky as he shifted his weight back and forth nervously. The one next to him tried to get him to be quiet, but his nerves got the best of him, and a shot rang out, making Joel jump in surprise. In his peripheral, he saw you fly out of your sleeping bag, scrambling for your gun. He crouched as low as he could without sacrificing speed, and made his way over to the office, wrapping his hand over your mouth as you twisted around about to shout out to him. He put a finger against his lips, and only when you hastily nodded did he slowly remove his hand, turning back around to hide behind the front counter with you peeking over his shoulder, watching the scene unfold.

Two infected came ambling towards the group. At first, they stumbled and were slow, but when one of them shifted his weight and slid on some loose asphalt, they both let out a horrific scream unlike anything you had heard before and charged towards the group. Neither of you could understand the creatures you were seeing: they had a fungus growing all over their bodies but primarily on their heads, a mouth was the only facial feature you recognized since the fungus had completely grown over the rest of their faces. Blood had stained their throats and chests, their clothes were ripped and barely hung on, and underneath their skin looked wrinkly, but upon closer inspection, it appeared to be more layers of fungus.

The assault rifles were spitting bullets and bouncing off the clickers, as if the fungus acted like some type of armor. One of the clickers jumped on the man who had slipped, viciously ripping into his throat while its fingers dug animalistically into his chest and blood pooled in the street below him. Another man saw his opportunity and pressed his pistol to the back of the clicker’s head, firing and watching its body drop to the pavement. Then without hesitation, he aimed his gun at his friend’s head and fired, his body jerked once and stilled. In the meantime, the second clicker had made short work of the other two men, one already ripped apart on the ground while it continued its assault on the other. The man did the same thing: walked up and shot the clicker in the back of the head, and for good measure shot the other two men on the ground. He was now the last man standing, panting for breath as he bent over to rest his hands on his knees. That was when he noticed the blood seeping through his jeans and trickling down to his sneakers.

“Fuck,” he whispered to himself, sitting down in the road to lift the pant leg. Joel could see the telltale imprint of teeth and blood when the man aimed his flashlight at his leg. He dropped the pant leg back down and hung his head between his knees. Joel tightened his grip on his rifle, expecting the man to come to the gas station in need of first aid, but before he could blink, the man lifted his pistol up to the side of his head and fired, dropping lifelessly to the side and joining the pile of dead bodies in the road.

Joel twisted around to try to shield your eyes, but it was too late. You let out a shaky breath, one tear sliding down your cheek as you looked up at him, his face full of concern. His eyes traveled down and reached his hand out to cup your face, his thumb gently wiping the tear away. Your eyes fluttered closed, and you had to resist the urge to lean into his touch.

"You alright?" he whispered to you in the dark. You nodded, breaking the contact and standing up.

The whole attack took less than five minutes. Joel approached the broken window and leaned out, listening intently to see if the noise had attracted any more infected or people. You waited as Joel went to each window multiple times to confirm nothing else was around. Satisfied, he turned back to you, your eyes wide and still gripping your gun at your side.

"I don't think anyone else is around," he said, placing the rifle next to the office chair. You nodded, tucking your gun in the back of your jeans.

"What the fuck was that?" you asked, staring at the bodies. "So these things are evolving now?"

"Seems that way," Joel answered, leaning tiredly up against the wall. He fought to keep his eyes open, but you could see he was exhausted.

"Go get some rest, I got this," you told him, "I'll wake you if I hear or see anything at all, I promise."

Joel wanted to resist and tell you he wasn't tired, but a yawn pushed through and gave him away. "You sure?"

"Yeah, go ahead. You need your rest, and we have to get out of this city tomorrow." You waved him off towards the office and went to sit in the chair after you grabbed his rifle, using the scope to get a better look at your surroundings.

Joel didn't bother rolling out his own sleeping bag, he just tucked himself into the one you were using, your scent enveloping him as he drifted off.

The sun rose about an hour ago. You waited as long as you could before deciding to wake Joel. He seemed so tired last night, you wanted him to get as much time as he could, but you knew you needed to leave. Once you got back into the forest, you could rest again. You went to the back office, carrying a to-go container of dry cereal in one hand, and found him snoring on his side with his back to the door. You popped a few pieces of Cinnamon Toast Crunch in your mouth and leaned down to gently shake his shoulder.

Joel whipped around at your touch and grabbed your wrist firmly, his eyes wild. You dropped your cereal in surprise.

"Joel! It's me," you yanked your arm, but he still held your wrist in his grasp and it was starting to hurt. "Joel!" you said again as loud as you dared. He finally realized and let you go, stumbling back a bit as you rubbed your wrist.

"Shit, sorry, must have been havin' a bad dream, you alright?" he asked worriedly, opening the sleeping bag and reaching forward to examine your wrist. He brushed his thumb tenderly over the red mark he left, the gesture making you melt and leaving you with a pang in your stomach.

"I'm fine, it's ok," you said, taking your wrist back and turning away from him, trying to create some space. "We should get going, eat something quick and I'll refill our packs with any supplies I can find."

"You sure you're ok?" he eyed you carefully. He hated how you shied away from his touch. You nodded, opening up another cereal from the shelf and continued to eat while you inventoried the food in your packs.

You shouldered your backpacks and guns after you ate, getting ready to head out. After stepping out onto the road, Joel frisked the dead bodies and picked up some more ammo for your handgun, along with two extra flashlights. He checked the assault rifles, too low on ammo for him to consider taking one, but he did remove two of the knives and sheathes strapped around their ankles, handing a set to you. The roads seemed quiet, so you took advantage and got a move on, silently threading your way through the city.

November 2003

Cleveland, OH

The weather was turning cold and rainy, even a couple nights leaving a dusting of snow that melted early the next morning. You trudged along behind Joel in the pouring rain, trying to stay hidden and dry by walking underneath a raised highway. It was risky, being close to the roads, but Joel didn't see much choice. The weather hasn't been cooperating for a couple days now, and your journey had significantly slowed down. He glanced at his watch, seeing it was around 4pm. It was getting darker earlier now, and the storm clouds just made it worse. He sighed, shaking the water droplets from his curls, and looked around. You were near an exit ramp. He saw it led to a suburban area maybe two miles away, clusters of smaller one story homes that the builders made as close as possible to one another in order to sell more houses.

"C'mon, this way," he said over his shoulder, bringing you out of your reverie. You looked in the direction he was leading you and quietly celebrated to yourself. You were tired and soaked, you didn't want to set up camp outside again and the possibility of sleeping on a mattress gave you a second wind.

The two of you hid in some thick decorative bushes looking down a road called York St. All the houses looked very similar and close together, the biggest differences being the color the owners had chosen for the siding. Joel had kept watch for about an hour in this position, waiting until it got dark so he could see if any of the houses had flashlights or lanterns inside. You were squatting next to him, trying to control your shivering but the rain was pouring down hard, and your clothes were dripping wet, even under your jacket. Your teeth chattered as you inadvertently leaned against him for some warmth. Focused intensely on the homes in front of him, Joel's body tensed at the unexpected contact. He glanced down at you and saw your soaking wet hair and your lips a darker shade than normal.

“Alright, let’s see if we can get into this one right over here, follow me.” he said, helping you stand into a crouch as you jogged over to the yellow house on the corner. Joel peered inside the windows for a minute while you stood watch with your arms crossed, keeping an eye out for any light or movement on the street or houses. You heard a snap behind you, and you turned to see Joel had used his large hunting knife to break the doorknob. You sighed with relief as you followed him inside, shutting the door behind you.

You swung your flashlights around the room, Joel rushing to the windows and closing all the curtains as you inspected the house. It was small: a living room, kitchen, one bathroom and two bedrooms. Joel went down into the basement to make sure it was clear while you emptied essentials from your pack in one of the bedrooms. You pulled out a somewhat dry set of clothes and tucked them under your arm, heading towards the bathroom. You took your jacket off to hang up on the shower rod to airdry and got to work peeling the soaking wet clothes from your body. You figured you could just toss the shirts you were wearing and pick up new ones here, but you really liked the jeans you had so you did your best to lay them out to dry in the tub.

After you put some dry clothes on, you started to feel a little better, but you still couldn’t shake the shiver in your bones. Joel mirrored your actions after he came up from the basement, changing into fresh clothes and hanging up the wet ones to dry, making sure to take the keychain out of his pants pocket and transferred it to his new ones, and then met you in the kitchen where you were rifling through the cupboards to see if there was anything worth eating. You pulled out a bag of trail mix, some canned tuna, and a few cans of mixed fruit, setting them on the small table while Joel rooted around for some forks.

You were hungrier than you realized and ate quickly, all the miles you walked today catching up with you.  Joel finally broke the silence after he finished a can of fruit.

“Which room did you want to sleep in?” he asked. This was the first time you stayed indoors where there were two sizeable beds. He wanted to give you the option, give you your space. You kept your gaze trained down at the bag of trail mix in front of you, considering his words. You knew he was giving you a choice, and it was completely up to you now on what the sleeping arrangements would be.

“I liked the room I put our backpacks in, why don’t we stay in that one.” you replied, still not looking up. We. Joel’s pulse sped up and he tried to hide his grin. You made the choice to stay the night with him, you wanted to be with him. It was probably just a habit for you, or maybe you were afraid to be on your own, but he didn’t care. He didn’t want to be apart from you, either, regardless if his reason differed from yours. 

That night, he heard you softly snoring, laying on your side with your back to him like usual. This time he deliberately turned over and wrapped his arms around you, pulling you close to him. He breathed in your scent and nestled his face at the back of your neck as you let out a contented sigh, and small smile played across his lips as he closed his eyes.

Chapter Eleven

Taglist: @chiogarza.

[imthedr3amer]

📖 Fic rec: SPN, Wincest, Explicit 🔎

Rating: Explicit

Archive Warning: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings

Fandom: Supernatural

Relationship: Dean Winchester/Sam Winchester

Additional Tags: Alternate Universe, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Consent Issues, Angst, References to Underage Sex [Extra tags by @imthedr3amer: Top Dean Winchester/Bottom Sam Winchester, Omega Sam Winchester, Mutual Pining, Sexual Harassment (Not between Sam/Dean), Blowjobs, Self-Lubrication, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Rimming, Happy Ending]

Language: English

Stats: Published: 2015-11-11 Completed: 2017-03-27 Words: 37,679

know the feeling

by sammyatstanford

Summary: Dean's brother has been missing for four years, but Dean has never stopped looking. Not even when he wonders if Sam might not want to be found.

[Don't forget to toss a kudos and a comment to the author, who is also here on Tumblr as @sammyatstanford. 🫶]

[mrsriddlenott]

Rivalry: Chapter Three

[masterlist][Ch1&2]

Regulus Black x fem!Reader

Warnings:Smoking,Rivals, “Enemies” to Lovers, Mutual Pining, Slow Burn.

The dungeons always felt so stuffy at night, especially after a bad afternoon spent in detention. The lavish green, silk bedsheets that the house-elves cleaned every chance they got did absolutely nothing to ease your mind. It clouded with Regulus’ weak smile, his attempts at helping you, his need for you to be there today. You’d skipped plenty of detentions before, some you were certain he’d attended with no problem, so why was today’s so important to him? Was he reeling you in for some elaborate joke?

No, Regulus wouldn’t waste his time like that, he’d find some other way to waste your time, you thought. Your dorm mates were fast asleep as the full moon shone visibly above the Black Lake, sleep had yet to find you, you tossed and turned, trying to focus on anything but the boy your mind always seemed to drift to.

You often found yourself riddled with insomnia in early winter, something about the shift in light and temperature had your brain fogged and desperately clingy to memories you wished it wouldn’t. As you slipped past the curtains of your four poster you were still focused on the dread a teenager shouldn’t be worried of, grabbing the tin safley hidden in the pocket of an unused cloak from the back of your closet. You slipped from your dorm, too distracted to think through your actions as you let your feet carry you up and out of the castle to the only place you found comfort in these days. The shimmering surface of the Black Lake came into view as your shivering figure made it’s way down the slope of the castle grounds.

The cold air bit at your skin as you tugged at the sweater you’d slept in, wishing you had thought to grab an extra layer, teeth chattering as you approached the Black Lake. Your eyes focused on a hunched figure in the spot of shore you found yourself occupying since you became a prefect and could easily get away with sneaking about at night. You stood, mere feet away, contemplating leaving to find a new spot before the stranger lurched to their feet, hiding something from you as they turned, towering over you in a way you knew all too well.

“Oh….it’s you,” the worry on his handsome features dissipated, laughing at his own fear as he settled back down on the wet ground. Hesitantly, you approached the boy, sitting at least two feet away as you cautiously observed his side profile.

“I didn’t think the perfect pureblood heir of the Black Family would sneak around and break school rules,” you laughed to yourself as you turned to watch the sky reflect off the water. Regulus found himself watching you intently, your laugh dying out as soon as it came. He read your face like a book, more eager to sit and listen to your voice and laugh than speak himself. Regulus wasn’t easily distracted, he had obligations and he knew they must be done. He put everything he felt aside for 6 years, and with each one it grew harder to deny what he wanted, what was right in front of him.

“Why are you here so late?” His smooth voice broke what felt like hours of tense silence. You had almost forgotten your reasoning for being here, all stress practically vaporized by the presence of the boy you were supposed to hate. You felt for the old altoids tin in your sweater pocket, popping it open to show the pre-rolled joints to the boy at your side.

“Now that is a surprise little miss perfect” Regulus’ smile shone to you in the dark, and as though it was contagious you were smiling right back. It felt like you were with someone you’d been close friends with your entire life, it was starting to feel easy to just be away from the drama of your usual friend group. Something about Regulus felt like a life boat, even though you were worried this wouldn’t last, that he’d go back to the boy you’d known for 6 years, you found yourself already clinging to him in that moment.

Regulus watched the side of your face as you focused on shielding your lighter from the wind, a small huff of frustration causing a cloud as you lightly shivered. He didn’t think of his actions or the meaning behind them as he slipped his leather jacket from his shoulders and draped it over yours. Your eyes met his as his hands retreated, a smile tugged at his lips as though to reassure you before you quickly worked your arms into the already warmed sleeves, muttering a thank you as you snuggled it closer. His scent surrounded you as your shivers died down allowing you to spark your almost forgotten joint, inhaling the harsh smoke with shut eyes and releasing it after in a cloud above your head.

Regulus studied you as he watched, resting his elbow on his knee and his chin in his hand with a smile, graciously taking it, brushing his cold fingers against yours as you offered him a drag. You could feel his eyes on you, seconds stretching into minutes while you watched the water, taking small hits back and forth just enjoying the silence you could share. You felt safe here, even with knowing the looming threat of the world you lived in, for some reason the open, practically unguarded shore and the strange boy beside you made you feel safer than you had in months.

Regulus stood as the joint slowly turned into a roach in your finger tips, eyes still on you while he particularly formed his sentence in his mind, “I’d really love to chat like this again sometime, but I’ve gotta go. I’ll see you around okay.” He seemed hesitant to leave, his voice far from the calm and collected one always lingering in the back of your mind, the way he halted worried you but you didn’t feel it was your place to say anything.

As he began his journey up to the castle again his scent hit you, feeling his jacket on your shoulders suddenly, mentally cursing yourself for your stupidity, you raised your voice to reach his figure, “You forgot your-

“Keep it, it’s too cold for you to walk back to the castle without it,” He stopped, only a few feet away now, still facing the silhouette of the castle as he spoke, calm and smooth once more.

“But won’t you be cold without it,” You questioned him, watching his back for what you swore could have been over half an hour at least before he was turning back to you.

“I don’t care about me,” he chuckled, tucking his hands in his front pockets, watching your widening eyes for a second, then turning to leave again. You returned to the ground, the sound of his footsteps retreating behind you as you sat, shell shocked in the moonlight.

~~~~

-HP Taglist-

(asked to be added or removed)

@timmytime17 @talia-scar123 @spencer-reids-wife @ttsbaby01 @animorose @whydoireadanymore @thievin-stealing @spiderman-stilinski @evycloudberry @shady-the-simp @ashisabitgay @porterport @callsignwidow @cicicicicisstuff @mattheoriddleswifee @junebugin-july @moonlightreader649 @devotedlyshadowytheorist @rubyliquor @perverteddsdreams @mildly-delulu @fairydimples07 @shadowmoonlight0604 @80scinemvasworld @nevillescomslut @annaisabookworm @abaker74 @athenalikethegoddess @limeren @h-------n @kezibear @mattheoriddlemarcuslopez @lovemelikecrazyiloveyoucrazy @curiousshifter101

[stusbunker]

Spotless: Fermata

Chapter Five

Featuring: Dean Winchester/Reader, Dean/Bela

Other characters: Sam/Madison, Chase the waiter

Word Count: 1815

Warnings, etc: Mutual pining, Dean casually getting dressed in front of the reader, third wheelin', Dean is a smooth motherfucker, unbeta'd

Series Masterlist

Divider courtesy of @cafekitsune

The glossy finish of Dean’s desk stuck to the sweat of your palms as you sat on the surface, waiting for him to finally decide on an outfit that Bela wouldn’t roll her eyes at the moment she saw him. He had been going through his wardrobe in front of you for the better part of an hour and you were both on the cusp of entirely different versions of frustration. He strutted out from his massive closet, pants undone and flashing you the same pair of boxer briefs you had been salivating over all morning. His shirt was open, showing off his one and only tattoo, high on his peck as he futzed with the collar, trying to get it to lay right and then he started to button.

“Can’t believe you set me up with some hoity toity wardrobe Nazi,” Dean grumbled a repeated accusation in a new and more colorful way.

“Don’t give me that crap, I know how much you like playing dress up,” you shot back.

He spun and glared at you. “Traitor. Even Charlie knows this dog-and-pony show is not the same as fighting orcs in the valley.”

You put on a face of mock sympathy. “You poor, poor thing, having to wear the free shit designers send you out in the wild.”

Dean flipped you off with one hand while tucking in his freshly buttoned shirt with the other. The way his shoulders stretched the gray fabric was more distracting than the thickness of the offensive finger.

“I’m not wearing a tie for fucking coffee,” Dean griped.

“No, you’re not. People’d think you went to church first and the last thing I want to start is cult rumors for either of you.”

Dean hopped on the balls of his feet as he zipped his fly, finally standing before you in an acceptable outfit. You looked him over as he fiddled with his cuffs.

“Roll them up, shows off your arms,” you coached him, as he went between glancing in the mirror on the back of the door to across the room for your appraisal.

Dean chuckled, but did as he was told.

“So, you calling in the paps or just seeing who catches on on their own?”

“I’ll have Bela post something, showing off you and her plate with a tag to the restaurant. I might snag some candids just in case, but I’m guessing you’ll get noticed.”

Dean dug through his rack of belts as you talked. “Can’t you get fired for leaking photos to the press?”

“Technically that is my job description, dude. But honestly? Only if I’m making extra money off of it— or if my boss decides to be a bigger dick than usual,” you sighed, avoiding scrolling through your phone as it buzzed next to your hip.

Dean smirked. “I’ll show you a bigger dick than—”

“None of that, god, Dean, shove down the locker room talk for like two hours. Please?”

He rolled his eyes and threaded his belt. “When it’s go time, I will be fucking angelic. I promise. I’ll show everybody what a gentleman I am. But you can’t just toss me a perfect spiral and get mad when I run with it.”

It was your turn to roll your eyes. “You hate football.”

Dean marched back across the room with a pair of Italian leather ankle boots and sat on the edge of his ridiculous bed to put them on. “No, I hate the televised corruption of football. It shouldn’t take twenty or thirty minutes for a two minute drill. But I wouldn’t say no to landing the Halftime show of the Super Bowl.”

“Noted.” You fell to the temptation of your phone, now that more of Dean was hidden than exposed. Bela had texted you twice, both with mirror selfies, you snapped a picture as Dean finger gunned his reflection to send back. She replied with a stream of positive emojis and you barked a laugh.

“What?!” Dean demanded.

“Outfit approved,” you spun your screen so Dean could read Bela’s response and his stupid face went from concentrating to smug in two seconds flat. He waggled his eyebrows at you but you stole your screen back before he could go scrolling through the conversation. His finger hung in the now empty air.

You typed a simple ‘you’re welcome’ to Bela and put your phone aside, screen down as Dean started on his hair in the en suite bathroom. You hopped off the desk and slinked into the doorway, bored and anxious in equal measure.

Staging public appearances had always been a hit or miss with Dean.

“You gonna be alright being Sam’s third wheel? I know you want to make this seem like it’s just me and Bela out, but we could still make it a group thing.”

“I’m so not dressed for an outing with Bela—”

Dean huffed as he washed the product from his hands.

“And we really need the focus to be on you, less distractions, better angles for candids, all that crap,” you said, professionally side-stepping the question.

“Yay,” Dean muttered with mock enthusiasm.

“You love the spotlight, remember?”

“Not the same thing. But I guess I have to live with it, don’t I?” Dean lamented, waiting for you to move out of the doorway and lead the way downstairs. He called for Sam, telling him that it was time to go over his shoulder. Something had shifted between you and you felt every ounce of his regret at the forced circumstances like it was a second skin.

Sam’s laugh, somewhere to your left, drew you out of your careful scrutiny of Dean’s posture across the patio. Madison had been telling a story, and though they both knew you were only there for work purposes, you still felt guilty for ignoring the conversation. You turned and faced the table and took a sip of your coffee. Sam gave you a squint, but didn’t say anything about your sudden return to reality, bless him.

“I think I’m going to do the eggs benedict scrambler. What are you thinking, Y/N?” Madison reminded you to look at the menu.

“Uh, I think I’m leaning more towards lunch, actually,” you said, because you really hadn’t processed anything on the laminated list in front of you.

Sam sipped his fresh squeezed grapefruit juice and you tried to speed read as your waiter returned with a cheerful look on his face.

“How’s it going over here? All set to order?” His name was Chase and he either was a bodybuilder on the side or he was an actor, which didn’t really take skill to parcel out in L.A., but it was still obvious.

Sam, the traitor, answered happily, “sure thing. I’ll have the kale frittatas and could we get a pitcher of Bloody Marys, please?”

“Okay, then,” Madison chuckled, shaking her head at Sam trying to get her tipsy in the middle of the day.

“Definitely, man,” Chase the waiter replied, typing in the order on his tablet. He then turned to Madison, which earned him an appreciative smile as your eyes darted back down onto the options.

You didn’t bother listening to what she ordered, too busy deciding on something you could eat without too much distraction. There was a certain columnist at Rolling Stone whom you wanted to get back in her good graces and if you could get her a good enough shot of Dean being Mister Charming, the better.

“What about you, doll?” Okay, you didn’t have an ounce of a fuck to give to this waiter who probably thought he was being slick. 

“I’ll take another water and— the DELICIOUS BREAKFAST SELECTION with wheat toast.”

“Got it. Alright, that’s all in and I’ll be back with your drinks in a sec.” Chase finally left, freeing you from scripted social interaction. Sam gave you a reassuring head tilt and turned back to Madison. Both of them were polite enough to not point out you did not actually order a lunch selection.

Bela and Dean were near the railing of the patio, perfect for visibility from passersby, but what caught your attention most was that they seemed to be genuinely smiling at one another as they talked over their meals. The urge to join them welled up, to know what had two people so close to you so amused, to be included in their tiny bubble. You stayed put, managing to snap a few pictures of them before the table next you was seated.

So far, it felt like it was working.

The rest of the meal went by in a blur, you checking your phone more than was strictly polite but neither Sam nor Madison seemed to mind. The waiter continued to be a little extra, but all you cared about was the couple of people that had gathered across the street not so subtly snapping pictures. Bela’s post must have done its job. Dean and Bela lingered after he paid the check and you wondered if they were waiting on your permission or actually enjoying themselves. But before you could text either of them a posh car pulled up next to the patio and Bela was standing up to confirm her ride.

You watched on bated breath, Dean ushering Bela out of the iron gate of the patio with a hand on the small of her back. He was always at ease with physical touch and you were grateful for that fact as he sold your lies. Bela turned to face Dean outside the waiting car. She smiled up at him and he said something, making her bite her bottom lip. Oh, shit, she was milking this!

That’s when he leaned in and planted a quick kiss on her lips, just a breath longer than a peck. Sam kicked you under the table but you ignored him. They were really doing this and you couldn’t deny they looked damn good together. Dean held the door as Bela climbed into the backseat and closed it when she was situated. He tapped the roof and turned to walk towards where he parked the impala. He kept his head up, but you could see the slight smirk on his lips which only deepened as you gave him a double thumbs up as he passed your corner of the patio.

Fucker had this down. 

You watched Dean walk away, hoping the photographers got that because you were not prepared for the goodbye kiss. And when Sam nudged your ankle for the second time you sighed and glared at him. He just raised his eyebrows. You ducked your head, trying to hide the heat on your cheeks. Which didn’t really make sense, you had gotten caught staring, so you chalked it up to mild embarrassment. It wasn’t jealousy, you had set this whole thing up. You were fine.

Tagging: @deans-spinster-witch@mrswhozeewhatsis@cosicas-cuquis@fics-pics-andotherthings-i-like@suckitands33@ladysparkles78@deans-baby-momma@stoneyggirl2@sassy-pelican@leigh70

Chapter Six: A Due

[munsonsreputation]

Fearless

steve harrington x fem!reader

inspired by "Fearless" by Taylor Swift

word count: [5.9k] proof-read (i tried!!!)

warnings: no use of y/n, mutual pining, a lot of fluff, basically this whole thing is FLUFF GALORE!!!!!, mentions of awkward first kisses.

summary: you and steve have known each other for a little while--both playing babysitting to the kids. steve makes the first move and asks you out on a date that takes a stormy turn. despite this you and steve make the most out of your date and it leads to sparks flying and a fearless first kiss.

God, you shouldn’t be feeling this nervous. After all, Steve was the one who asked you out on a date. He made the first move, and all you had to do was make sure to be there and not get distracted by his charm and good looks—Jesus, you were already beginning to drift off into Space Harrington.

“Honey, you look beautiful, as always.” Your mother leaned up against your doorframe, bringing you back to reality as you turned to her and gave her a sincere smile.

“You don’t think it’s too much?” you asked suspectedly, looking down at your little black dress and short platform heels. It had just rained a few hours ago, and it had only begun to clear up. You had been debating on this outfit or tossing on a sweater and some shorts—but this would be a pleasant change from your usual attire.

Your mom sang, letting herself into your room and looking through the blinds to see the pavement still drenched in rain water, but the sky clearing up in this early afternoon, “I think you’ll be fine sweetie, seems to be getting a bit sunny.”

You nodded, walking over to your vanity, put on a few accessories while your mother sat on the end of your bed. Giving you encouraging looks and sweet compliments that eased your nerves a bit. She knew of Steve, given the fact that he would drop off the kids at your place when he needed to take an extra shift at Scoops on late notice.

It became a recurring theme in your short friendship that began this summer—but with fall and a new school year on the way, you and Steve’s little drop offs lessened. You’d miss each other, even when your interactions and conversations were short, you both longed for more time to get to know one another, and surprisingly enough Steve had asked you out on a date last weekend when you stopped by Scoops to pick up a tub of ice cream for you and the kids.

You clasped on your little necklace before hearing a few knocks on your front door, “be back at a decent time, please.” your mom smiled at you through the reflection of the mirror.

Nodding your head, you gave her a quick hug and kiss on the cheek as she watched you pick up a small purse and rush your way down the stairs. You took a deep breath, internally preparing yourself before you slowly opened it up.

There he stood.

Striped polo, blue jeans with his signature brown belt, his red Nike Cortez’s, and a bouquet of red roses in his hands.

“H-hey,” he sputtered, letting out an awkward greeting, too enraptured by your getup, only snapping out of his stupor when you finally spoke.

“Hey yourself, Steve. You look nice!”

He shook his head, finally pressing the flowers towards you, “Got these for you…you look beautiful by the way, I mean you always do, but wow…I just—sorry, if I’m being weird.”

You giggled with your teeth trapping your bottom lip, taking the flowers from his hands and giving them a whiff, “I’ll put these in a vase when I get back home.”

He nodded, watching as you placed them on the small counter at your front door before you stepped out with him.

“Weather has been all over the place today huh?” He came up with, resting a warm hand on the small of your back as he guiding your to his car.

You wanted to snort at how silly it was that he was talking to you about the weather, of all things, when there was so much that you two wanted to say to each other. Maybe he was nervous, and you were just doing a better job at concealing your own inner anxiety.

“Yeah, I wasn’t too sure if I wanted to wear this since it might come down again…hopefully it doesn’t.” You smiled up at him, his fingers wrapping around the door handle, letting you in as he nodded politely.

The quiet buzz of his car engine that was still running and music coming from the stereo system filled your ears for the quick seconds of silence before your favorite voice echoed.

“I’ve got a jacket somewhere back there if it ends up storming again,” he assured you, hands resting on the top of the door until you buckled yourself in.

“Thanks, Steve.”

You turned your head towards the backseat, as you waited for Steve to get into the drivers’. Your eyes catching a small picnic basket, along with other junk that cluttered his backseat before—

“Hey! No peeking missus,”

Your eyes were back to the front, trying to keep a guilty look on your face, but you couldn’t help but let out a laugh especially when Steve had his arms across his chest like a father.

Your chest never stopped churning with laughter, body bending over to clutch your tummy, “I’m sorry, you just look like a father when you do that.”

He chortled, shaking his head as he started up the car and began the drive to your surprise date that he had planned all by himself…ok maybe he received a little advice from Dustin and Lucas about the fall hotspots that girls love.

“The kids really miss you, y’know?” Steve looked over at you as you smiled, resting a hand over your heart.

“Haven’t seen them in over a week. I’ve just been so busy and they’re growing up and don’t want me meddling in their business anymore,” you half joked.

Steve scrunched his brow is disagreement, shaking his head, “Don’t be ridiculous, the kids love you…they’re just, you know…exploring the boundaries of—”

Your hand shot up, holding it in front of him to stop, “Ew! Please, let’s not discuss the sex lives of the children we’ve been babysitting for the last year.”

“I’m just being honest…jesus I hope they got the talk because I am way too young to—”

“Steven!”

“I’m kidding! I’m joking!”

The laughter that filled the car slowly died, but never did the feeling of warmth and affection. The two of you rarely had anytime to spend together alone, so this was definitely a little different and nerve-racking, but he never failed to make you feel comfortable and today was no different.

Your body shifted towards your left, feeling inclined to want to be close to him, despite sitting beside each other already, “So where are we headed?”

“It’s a surprise dingus,” He experimented a bit, taking his right hand off the wheel to gently probe at your side, insuring a giggle that meant you didn’t mind and he liked that.

He brought both hands back to the wheel and glanced back over at you, “I’ll give you a hint. It’s some place really pretty.”

You scoffed jokingly before responding, “Geez, guess that leaves our options limited in this small town.”

“Hey! Are you doubting my picking a date skills?”

You shook your head, smiling a bit, “Of course not, you’re Steve Harrington for godsake. I bet you know allllll the hot spots around here.”

He rolled his eyes playfully, “Yea, alright, whatever you say.”

Then he did that goddamn thing.

Running his fingers through his hair. It was such a simple action, but it always made you weak in the knees. How the strands of his dark brown hair seemed to flow perfectly through his digits and fall back into place with ease. Jesus, you just wanted to pounce on him and coat him with kisses, but instead you had to play it cool.

“Stop staring at me to distract me!”

Your eyes blinked wildly, and your bottom lip that mindlessly got caught between your teeth was released as you shook your head, pretending to not be affected by him.

“I am not staring!”

“Oh yes, you were!” He argued with an amused look on his face that let you know you had to be caught.

“You must be hallucinating, Steven.” You waved him off as he laughed lightly, making an incoherent comment about how it was more than ok, how he liked it when you stared, anyway.

The rest of the drive was filled with small talk and laughter. It felt easy. Just the way you liked it.

Soon you felt the car stop and watched Steve place his car in park.

“We—we’re at a hill?” You asked questionably, lifting your brows as you peered between Steve and the surrounding setting.

Steve turned his head towards you, smiling as he nodded his head confidently, “Yup…just trust me, ok?”

“I do.”

You didn’t hesitate to trust him at all, and when he heard those two sweet words slip from your mouth, he could feel his heart swarm warmly.

He held one of his palms out, gesturing for you to wait in your seat. And so you did. He got out of the driver’s seat, quickly opening the back door to grab some stuff, then jogging over to the passenger. Opening your door and holding his hand out graciously as you took it with ease.

The wet rain drops sprinkled over your ankles and feet slightly as you two walked through the dewy grass and up the hill until you reached the small flat area that was decorated with a red and white picnic blanket and more flowers that were picked and scatters on the fabric.

You gasped, dropping his hand as yours covered your mouth in surprise. Stepping closer to get a better view of the setup. He had gone all out of the way to plan this, and you knew that the kids must have helped somehow.

“Do you like it?” Steve’s voice was a bit nervous, and you could sense it in his worrying tone.

You turned your head back to him and nodded obviously, “Steve, are you kidding me? This is the sweetest thing anyone has ever done for me.”

“Yes!” is what Steve wanted to say, but instead, kept the celebration in his head while he smiled, taking a few steps to get closer to you. Wrapping his free hand around your shoulders to give you a warm hug.

“Here sit.” He said, pulling away and gesturing you to sit. The material beneath you, thick enough to not feel the wetness of the rain from an hour ago, but the air still lingering with a breeze that was nice.

Steve set down the picnic basket, pulling out a variety of finger foods and drinks, explaining each of them.

“I packed us some sandwiches; one has turkey, the other ham. I also picked up one of those small veggie platters from the grocery store, along with some chips. I think Dustin said that you liked Doritos and Lays, so I just got both. Oh! And then yesterday when I dropped off Lucas, his mom gave me a bag of fruits, so last night I just chopped them up and put them in tupperwares so that we could enjoy them today. If you don’t like any of these, then we can totally go to the store or somewhere else to get some—”

“Steve, it’s perfect. Everything is perfect.”

Thank god you cut his rambling off short because it seemed that he was running out of breath from talking so fast just like Robin did when she was nervous. Nevertheless, it was cute. He had put a ton of thought and consideration in this date, making sure he got you everything you liked.

“Y-yeah?” His voice cracked a bit as you giggled and nodded, reaching over to run your thumb over his fingers that rested on his knee.

“A hundred percent certain.” You guaranteed him, leaning over to peck his cheek, ignoring the worries in your head and becoming completely courageous with him.

He eased feeling the touch of your lips on his skin, even if it was only for a few seconds. He would savor that feeling and never forget it. Wrapping that moment in time up and storing it in his mind to reply over and over again.

“Let’s dig in, shall we?”

You opted for the turkey sandwich, but occasionally stealing bites of Steve’s, which he found was adorable. He didn’t mind sharing. In fact, anything that was his, he would share with you, no questions asked.

“You’re a child!” Steve snickered out with a full mouth as he watched you remove the small bits of crust that were left on your sandwich that you were almost done with.

You took the piece and chucked it at him, hitting his nose before it plopped down onto his lap, “The crust is like the worst part of a sandwich!”

“That’s something a child would say.” Steve rebutted as you rolled your eyes with no real malice behind them.

He dusted his fingers off, watching as you enjoyed your last bits of crust-free-turkey-and-swiss. He felt a sense of pride knowing you had been indulging in a lunch he made all by himself. He would have to make it for you again if you liked it this much.

Steve reached over back into the picnic basket, “I actually have another surprise.”

You began giddily clasping your hands together as he pulled out the stocky piece of the latest tech, “Holy shit! This brand new?”

He smiled as you looked at him, silently asking if you could hold it, and so he handed it to you, watching you inspect the device before checking the film slot.

“I just put a new pack in. We can take some pictures if you want?”

You nodded eagerly, peeping through the viewfinder as Steve adjusted his posture and ran a rough hand through his hair that made your heart burn and cheeks blush. You hoped that Steve couldn’t see you ogling like a school girl behind the thing or else you’d never hear the end of it.

“Cheese!” you exclaimed as he flashed you his pearly whites and the flash went off, his eyes squinting for a second before adjusting back to the normal light.

Your fingers deliberately pulled the photo out from the slot, walking on your knees towards him, leaning over as you shook the film and watched it slowly develop.

“This is so fascinating.” You murmured, eyes trained on the photo while his were stuck on your face, compelled at the way you scrunched your forehead together so that it creased as a small bit of your tongue snuck out of your mouth while you waited with anticipation.

Finally, after a few more seconds, your face lit up with an amazed grin, glancing over at Steve, who did his best to act like he too was watching the photo develop, “HA! How cool is that!”

“It’s neat, isn’t it?” Steve replied, taking the photo from you as he looked at all the details that this photo was able to capture.

You leaned against him, hovering to keep looking at the photo, “I always wanted one of these things, might need to get one this weekend.”

He turned to you, letting the photo fall carelessly onto the picnic blanket, as he placed a warm hand on your hip, “I could drive you if you want?”

“You’d do that?” You asked comically, as if Steve wouldn’t drop everything and do whatever it was that you wanted on a Saturday, even if he had made plans beforehand.

Steve nodded, rubbing comforting circles with his thumb, “course I would…now we gotta take some photos of you!”

You smirked, watching him take the camera from your hands before he stood up, walking a bit backwards as you stayed in place, standing on your knees.

“Do I look ok?” you somewhat raised your brow while you combed your fingers through your hair, attempting to get it nicely messy.

He peeped watching you through the camera lense, bopping his head, “The prettiest girl in Hawkins.”

“Steveeeee stoppppp.” You dragged out the words, an evident rose tint peeking through your blushed cheeks as he purred.

“It’s true! Now smile!”

You closed your eyes on habit, but still your smile splayed across your face as you heard the click, “You closed your eyes!”

“I know! I know! I’m sorry!” You threw your head back as he laughed, shaking his head freely.

“S’ok we can take more…c’mon give me another smile,” You nodded, changing your pose a bit before he spoke again, “Eyes open this time.”

You giggled at his certain tone, keeping your eyes open just like he asked as he counted down from three, fingers pressing the button and the flash left as quickly as it came.

“Wow, sooooo pretty.” Steve said, while he walked back over to you, showing you the picture that was still developing as you scoffed, pushing his hands away.

“You can’t even see how it turned out yet.” You crossed your arms across your chest, watching as he shrugged his shoulder.

“I don’t need to see how the picture turned out to say you’re pretty…you’re right here next to me, the prettiest girl in Hawkins.”

The warm feeling burned in your stomach, as did your cheeks. He knew how to make you feel smitten and usually you’d be embarrassed by the compliments, but it was nice, especially coming from him.

“How lucky am I that I get to be in the presence of the prettiest boy in Hawkins?”

What overcame you to give you such confidence to compliment him back? You don’t know what it was. Maybe it was him. Maybe it was just genuine courage. Whatever it was, you wanted more of it.

Steve just smiled, as wide as the one placed on your face as he lifted the camera, not bothering to look through the lense as he snapped another photo of you.

“Steve!” You giggled, reaching over to try to wrestle the camera out of his hands to take your own candid of him.

It only ended up becoming a tickle match as he poked your sides, with the camera long forgotten on the picnic blanket below you two. His fingertips chased your sides and the crease of your neck, while you wiggled beneath him in a poor attempt to get away from his tickles that never stopped. The uncontrollable laughter and shrieks in the crisp air, until you felt a wet splat on your nose.

“uh oh,” you and Steve both whispered, as he stopped his movements. The droplets becoming bigger and hitting the two of you now as the rain danced on Steve’s shirt covered back and against your bare thighs.

Yet the laughter only seemed to get boisterous with you wiggling your way out from underneath Steve as he took your hand and pulled you up with him. His freehand practically bound the blanket around everything, creating a sack that would be easier to carry.

“Let’s make a run for it!” He screeched, giving your hand a squeeze as he led the way down.

The rain came down quicker with each step that almost became a tumble down the hill a few times. He quickly opened the doors to his car, throwing in the blanket full of stuff into the backseat and reaching in for the spare jacket he had in there.

“Here, take this.” Steve flared open the material, draping it over your head and shoulders as he opened the passenger door for you, quickly getting you settled.

He shut the door and raced over to his side of the car. His arm barricading his head from the big droplets of rain that splashed against his skin before he was able to get into cover.

Your skin was dewy from the water. Thankfully, his jacket was thick enough to salvage your hair and makeup. You smiled up at him once he got into his seat. Pulling the jacket away from your head and patting it against your arms and legs where dewdrops spread.

He was chuckling to himself, flipping his visor down to get a look at his rain-soaked face. A few teeny drops floating on his eyelashes and eyebrows, and his hair was now soaked. Yet somehow it still looked perfect, falling into place with a strand curling into his forehead, laying there flawlessly.

You giggled, sitting up on your knees as you leaned forward, “Steve, let me help,” the jacket sleeve now brushed against his cheeks and eyes as the cotton collected the water.

Steve looked up at you, surprised by the touch. He watched you, lip caught between your teeth as you moved the fabric towards his hair, attempting to ring out the excess water as gently as possible without tugging on his roots.

“Better?” You proposed, finally releasing your lip from between your teeth as you looked down at him.

He smiled widely, nodding his head as he felt you fall away back into your seat where you wrapped his jacket around you tighter, creating warmth to your skin.

“Shit, here,” He hurriedly lurched forward, messing with the knobs and buttons on dash until the heater light came on, and warm air erupted from the vents, immediately making you feel a lot less cold.

You closed your eyes, appreciating the kindness of the boy beside you, before you peeked one eye open and looked at him, “Thank you, Steve.”

“No problem,” He replied, reaching over to rub your arm back and forth, gently producing more warmth under his jacket and beneath your skin.

Honestly, you were hoping that Steve couldn’t feel you shaking right now. Not because of the damn weather, but with how close he was to you. It was no different from earlier when you two were practically tickling the lives out of one another, but this was so sweet—too sweet, almost.

It was as if Steve was ticking off all the boxes for your first date expectations. First the flowers. Then the opening of the car door. Next, the whole surprise date setup. On top of that was his tooth rotting compliments. Then giving you his jacket and now doing everything he can to make you feel comfortable.

This doofus was your dream man.

You finally had it in yourself to open your eyes, watching the water slide down the windowpane with the gloom of the town settling in darker, “I don’t want today to end, just yet.”

He hummed, nodding his head in agreement, running his hand up your arm then over your jaw where it rested and gently turned your face to his, “Me neither.”

His eyes were boring into yours, and it was taking every ounce of your control not to squeal like a madwoman with the way he was delicately looking into you and how his voice was so soft.

Steve continued, brushing his thumb over your cheek slowly, “We can just drive around and talk? Does that sound ok?”

“It sounds perfect.” You smiled back, feeling grateful for Steve’s spontaneity.

The drive was hushed at first, but not the troublesome kind. Just not bothering to fill the space with words until you both were ready to. And when the both of you did begin talking about the most randomest things, you found yourself laughing more than you had in a while—your heart swelling with joy.

His camera had found its way back into your hands, and now as the conversation went on, you couldn’t help but to snap photos of Steve mid-laugh or when he’d glace over at you from the road. You just wished that the damn thing had a video record option so that you could capture the moment and replay it over and over again.

Steve continued driving, the rain tapping softly on the windshield as he shared stories about his high school days.

“I remember one time, Tommy and I snuck into the school after hours and rearranged all the desks in the classrooms,” Steve said, grinning at the memory.

You laughed, shaking your head at his antics that were probably still somewhere in him, “You were quite the troublemaker, huh?”

Steve shrugged. “I had my moments. What about you? Did you ever get into any trouble?”

You shook your head. “No, I was always a bit of a goody two-shoes. The worst thing I ever did was get caught kissing a boy by my mom.”

Steve’s eyes widened, reaching a red light and turning to you. “Your mom was mad? How old were you?”

“Like fifteen. I was a freshman, and I had a major crush on the guy! I was getting picked up after school and my mom just had to pull up at that moment.”

You and Steve both shared a good laugh. Him trying to picture what freshman year you looked like and how horrified your mother must have looked like in the car. You knew exactly what she looked like, mouth wide open with her eyes just as big, before she rolled down the window and yelled at you to get in.

You never spoke to that boy ever again, and it was now a memory that you and your mom looked back on and laughed it today.

By now, the laughing slowly died, and the light turned green, ushering Steve to continue on the streets taking random turns until he ran out of road.

“So, what was your first kiss like?” Steve suggested, glancing over at you.

You laughed nervously, cringing at the memory of the actual kiss itself.

“It was...boring, to be honest. I was nervous and excited, but when it finally happened, there was no spark. It was just...bleh.”

Steve chuckled, tapping his fingers on the wheel, thinking about his first kiss back in eighth grade, “Yeah, I get that. My first kiss was okay, but it was kind of gross at first. The girl added tongue, and I wasn’t expecting it.”

You cringed, thankful your first kiss didn’t add tongue, but it was wet and awkward, “That does sound gross.”

“It wasn’t great,” Steve admitted. “But it got better after a few seconds.”

You cackled, throwing your head back against the leather rest. “Well, at least it got better.”

They drove in silence for a few moments; the rain continuing to tap on the windshield.

“You know, I’ve always been waiting for that spark,” you said, voice thoughtful. “Like in the movies, you know? That electric moment when you kiss someone and it’s like fireworks go off. But I’ve never had that.”

Steve nodded, thinking back to all his kisses and never really feeling that feeling with any girl he had ever been with. “Yeah, I know what you mean. I’ve had some good kisses, but I’ve never felt that spark either.”

You shook it out of your thoughts, not wanting to even get your hopes up about kissing Steve on your first date. It probably wouldn’t happen and even if it did, you were so incredibly nervous that you wouldn’t be good at it. Sure, you had boyfriends and kisses here and there, but they weren’t the best.

Kissing was intimate, and you wanted to do good, especially if it was going to be with Steve Harrington.

Your mind was racing.

What if Steve wanted you to kiss him? What if Steve wanted to kiss you? Was he going to initiate it? Which way were you going to need to tilt your head? Should you add tongue? What if you get lipstick on his lips? Was your lips too dry?

God, your fears were echoing in your head.

“Have you ever danced in the rain?”

The question blurted out of your mouth before you could even think if it was a question worth asking. You just wanted to get those stupid thoughts out of your mind and before you knew it, here you were spurting out if Steve Harrington ever danced in a goddamn storm.

Steve thought for a moment. “Probably when I was a kid,” he said, shrugging, looking over at you, “Why do you ask?”

“I—I never have,” you admitted. “In the movies they always do it…I’ve never had the chance.”

Steve grinned, changing lanes before speaking, “Why don’t we change that?”

You watched as he turned off the main street and into an empty parking lot. All stalls were empty, and he freely parked in the middle of the lot not caring if he was in the lines or not.

You looked at him, surprised, leaning forward. “What are you doing?”

“Come on,” Steve smiled, twisting the key out of the ignition and opening his door.

You looked out the window at the pouring rain, feeling a little nervous about suggesting this, but as Steve appeared at your side to lead you out of the car, you felt a surge of excitement flowing through your veins, “Dance with me?”

Feeling the cold raindrops hit your skin. You twirled around, feeling giddy with excitement, while Steve watched with a soft smile on his lips. The rain drenching both of you from head to toe didn’t matter as you both laughed, hopping around the pavement with your arms wide open.

And then, without warning, he took your hand and pulled you close to him. Steve's hands on twisting around your waist, and instinctively your arms around his neck. You both started to sway back and forth to the rhythm of the rain, feet splashing on the ground, giggling at the absurdity of it all.

As you and Steve danced, the rain wasn’t the only that washed over you, but also a sense of joy and freedom. It was like nothing else in the world mattered except for this moment, this dance in the rain with the person you felt everything for.

As the minutes passed with your relentless dancing, the rain began to ease up little by little—dissipating into a light drizzle.

Your movements got slower and steadier, just moving back and forth in each other arms before you rested your cheek on his chest, feeling the steady beat of his heart.

“Thanks for this,” you whispered, feeling a little shy, but it quickly passing his arms squeezed your tighter, his chin resting on your head.

“Anytime,” Steve replied, his voice soft. “I had a great time dancing in the storm with you.”

Your breath hitched, hearing his words flow out of his mouth, knowing he was content here with you even if you both were soaked through your clothing and probably would end up with a cold by the night.

Slowly, your face left his chest, and his chin retracted from your head.

You swallowed thickly, closing your eyes, just about ready to go for it. Even Steve had closed his eyes, slotting his head to the side leaning forward, only a few more milliliters separating your lips.

You could feel his breath fanning over your skin as you moved closer. Your heart was beating out of chest, the thoughts in your mind slowly echoing again. You tried to ignore it—just go for it.

And you were so close, but the sudden crack in the sky, rumbled loudly out of nowhere causing you to move back, started.

Steve immediately grabbed your hand, leading you back to the car. “Let’s get out of here,” he declared, opening the door for you.

You felt a more than embarrassed, stuffing your face in your hands when he shut your door and jogged over to his side. You could hear him open the door and shut it, moving around in his seat to get comfy before letting out a grunt seeing your state.

He placed a warm hand on your shoulder, causing you to peek at him through your fingers before pulling them away from your face entirely.

“I’m sorry,” you said, looking down at your feet. “I—I got carried away.”

Steve repeated the action that had you melting earlier in the day. His hand coddling your jaw making you look up at him. “Don’t be sorry,” he said, smiling reassuringly. “I wanted to kiss you, too. But safety first.”

A rush of affection filled you.

He wanted to kiss you.

Steve Harrington wanted to fucking kiss you.

His hand dropped from your cheek and instead intertwined with your hands as he clicked on his seatbelt and kissed the back of your hand before he began driving. The rain was still echoing in your ears, but only lightly as the clouds ironed out and a twinge of golden hour peeked through the gloom.

Steve turned into your neighborhood after a short while, the two of you laughing as he got lost down random back roads after taking a bunch of random turns, but nevertheless he found his way.

He parked the car, sadly loosening your hands as he got out to get you. He led you to the back of his trunk, grabbing a few spare pieces of clothing to dry off with. He passed you a graphic tee, allowing you to ring out the water from your hair, and he did the same with a pair of shorts.

You finished first, leaning up against his car, and watching him with a smile on your face as he wipe the fabric up and down his arms, “Thanks again for today.”

He looked up, tossing the pieces back into the trunk and shutting it closed, “It was my pleasure, doll.”

Again, he reached for your hand, clasping it together as he walked you to your front door, a glow of the sun shimmering off your skin, glittering your eyes in the rays as he stared at you in awe.

He couldn’t even fantom the fact that he was able to score a date with the prettiest girl in Hawkins, let alone had the chance to get this close to you. For once he was thankful that through those little twerps he babysat that he was able to meet you.

“I had a great today with you…” He took your other hand, in his, squeezing both of them as he continued, “I uh—do you wanna do it again sometime? In a few days or whenever you’re free?”

Your heart skipped a beat knowing you and Steve would be seeing each other soon, “I’d love that.”

Today was a fairytale even if the weather may have changed your plans, but every raindrop was worth it if it meant you being here with Steve and another date already set for the upcoming days.

You couldn’t let this day end without showing him how you felt. Feeling a sense of boldness and knowing Steve felt the same, you undid your hands from his, wrapping it around his neck.

Before he could say anything, you leaned in and pressed your lips against his, feeling a rush of electricity shoot through your body.

Steve was taken aback for a moment, but then he melted into the kiss, wrapping his arms around your waist and pulling you closer to him.

The spark of electricity flowed between the both of you the second your lips touched. The kiss was full of passion and emotion—like you could just lose yourself in Steve and he felt a sense of joy and wonder, as if a whole new world had just opened up to him.

You both stayed like that for a few moments, lips locked in a tender embrace, before pulling away slowly.

Steve smiled at you, his eyes sparkling with affection a contrast to his low and husky voice, “I’ve been wanting to do that all day.”

Today had been everything you both had ever wanted, and more.

“Then let’s not let it go.” You spoke serenely, orbs flickering up at him as he nodded with a smile, his hands splayed on your back now, pulling you closer.

Both of your eyes fluttered closed as you leaned in for another kiss, then another, and then one more for good luck—feeling fearless than ever.

A/N: all credits to taylor swift for writing this beautiful song!!!! i think fearless tv as a whole is such a steve coded album and i just had to write this!!! let me know what you think and please reblog!! any interaction is greatly appreciated!!!

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