#wishing everyone a very pleasant gender

[swaggot-socks]

I’m a boy in a girl way

I’m a girl in a boy way

I’m a chick using he/him pronouns and a dude using she/her pronouns

I’m transmasc AND transfemme

[bvidzsoo]

Is Santa the new Cupid?

Author: bvidzsoo

Pairing: Kim Hongjoong x gender neutral reader

❆ Warning: none, no usage of Y/N ❆ Word count: 5.9k ❆ Rating: sfw ❆ Genre: holiday themed, office romance, mutual pinning, brother's best friend, fluff ❆ Summary: With the holiday's rolling around, everyone is in a festive spirit. You're not a huge fan of Christmas, but your brother is, so, he organises a Secret Santa themed party at work. What you don't expect, however, is for him to scheme to try and bring you together with your work crush.

A/N: ~Ho, ho, ho, @hee0soo your Secret Santa is here! ^^ I hope this story is to your liking and that you will enjoy it! As for everyone else, hello, my lovelies! This is a little event I partook in, and I'd like to thank @cromernet for hosting it, being in this server has been nothing but a pleasure! <3 To those who celebrate it, I wish you all a very Merry Christmas, and to those who don't, a well earned rest and an overall joyful time! I hope everyone will enjoy this little piece, and if I don't write anything in the upcoming days, then I wish you a Happy New Year, and I shall see you in the next year! Thank you for being here and for supporting me, for all the feedback and kindness, you make writing a little more pleasant! I'll let you go on and read now, I hope you enjoy! Your feedback is always appreciated! <33 divider

            The holidays had always been a mess. No matter where you looked, people were stressing about getting the perfect gifts, the most glamorous outfits, the best seasoning for their food, and the most colourful decorations they could get their hands on. The sight was enough to send you into another spiral of why you thought this whole fussing about a celebration—that not everyone celebrates, by the way—was so unnecessary and only damaging your health, raising your cortisol levels. But alas, this is how the world worked, and you couldn’t go against it. Your flat was minimally decorated, and you were still debating whether you’d get a Christmas tree this year or not. There was no point in throwing out money if you weren’t wholeheartedly in tune with the whole holiday…that is unless your nosy brother decides to take over your flat like last year and turn it into a whole Christmas fest. You swear you were finding glitter even a month later in places like your salt shaker and the medical cabinet in your bathroom. Seonghwa loved everything shiny, so when his lovely sibling refused to abide by his wishes, he put his persuasive skills to use and coerced you into the most blinding corset you could have ever found. Which brings us to the current time, with you hiding out in your brother’s office and furiously scrubbing at the stained red glitter. Nothing was working, your co-worker’s red wine would be forever embedded into your pricey piece of clothing.

You didn’t blame him, it was an unfortunate accident. The waiter was walking by with a tray filled with cheese when your co-worker had thrust his hand backwards, calling for a disaster. Which happened mere seconds later when the beverage sloshed all over your chest and the top of the sweetheart neckline of your corset. You sighed as you gave it one last try, perhaps if you put more passion into it then you might be able to make the stain fade a little bit. The fabric of the corset was a bright red and the dark stain was rather visible despite the glittery studs that covered it. You had told Seonghwa that the outfit was a bit too much for an office Christmas party, but he only told you to suck it up and wear it unless you didn’t want to be on theme. Which you were, thanks to your brother, except that seemingly everyone else had gone for more casual or silly outfits, and here were you…wearing a sexy sparkly—now ruined—corset, and some black wide-legged pants that hid the stilettos which matched the colour of your top. With a frustrated groan, you flopped into the chair placed in front of your brother’s desk and closed your eyes, accepting your fate.

You would’ve further ruined the fabric at this point if you kept on scrubbing the way you were, and that would be a waste of Seonghwa’s money…since he was the one to get you this outfit. He was rather pushy this year, it was suspicious, but you didn’t question it. Your brother had always been a bit weird, particular about the things he liked, and a perfectionist in everything he did…but at least he spoiled you well, so you couldn’t really complain. The cacophony of the ongoing party from beyond the door reminded you that you couldn’t hide out in your brother’s office anymore, so you took a deep breath and told yourself that everyone would understand how the stain got there without ridiculing you. Your co-worker already felt terrible for being so clumsy, and you weren’t even mad at him. The door which you had left ajar was suddenly flung open, and your eyes widened when you saw who had walked inside. Great, just what you needed…your work crush to see you in this state of despair when today was supposed to be filled with jolliness. You quickly stood and dusted off your pants out of habit, trying to keep yourself calm and collected…which was something you often failed to do in Kim Hongjoong’s presence.

He wore something similar, suspiciously, and for a millisecond you wondered if this was Seonghwa’s work, who wasn’t just your brother, but also Hongjoong’s best friend. When you say work crush…you mean the longest crush you’ve had on anyone since you’ve been hopelessly pinning on Hongjoong since like…high school. Embarrassing, but you were a few years younger, and Hongjoong was too cool to notice you or regard you as anyone else than his best friend’s younger sibling. Hongjoong’s cat-like eyes widened as the two of you stared at each other wordlessly, and you realized his blazer looked an awful lot like your corset. It was the same shade and had the same sparkly studs, the shoulders were puffed out, and it was cropped, stopping right above Hongjoong’s waist. He had always been stylish, and he loved going all out at events like this one. His long black pants reached below his ankles, and the huge black bow tied around his waist truly elevated the whole look. His satin white shirt was spotless, unlike your stained corset. You wished you had something to cover it with…you supposed perfectionism ran in the family, after all.

“Hi.” Hongjoong broke your wordless staring contest, and you gulped down your nerves, trying to smile at him. You’ve been working together for two years, for God’s sake, you couldn’t freeze anytime Hongjoong even as much as looked at you.

“Hi.” You greeted back lamely, and you were thankful that your voice wasn’t squeaky at least. Hongjoong’s eyes took a quick sweep of your body, and you fought against yourself to keep at bay the blush blooming over your cheeks.

“Is everything okay?” Hongjoong, the ever-considerate guy he was, asked with a concerned look on his face, “I saw you storm off and…I thought maybe something happened.”

How could you not have a crush on this man when he acted like this?

“Oh, I’m alright, don’t worry.” Except that you weren’t exactly, and you knew he could see it on your face, so, you sighed defeated, “Well, okay, Mingi spilt his wine on me and now my corset is stained…and I hate it because everyone can see it.”

You were pouting as you looked down at the darker spot on your corset, and maybe you became a bit sulkier when Hongjoong just chuckled. He looked adorable with his lips curling upward, fighting the urge to outwardly laugh in your face. That was nice of him, you were glad he was nice enough to not make fun of you…not that Hongjoong would make fun of anyone, he was the first one to shut down even the hint of bullying if he came across it.

“Sounds like it’s the end of the world,” Hongjoong teased you, and you rolled your eyes in exchange, “Did you bring a blazer?”

“No,” You shook your head, flopping back down on the chair, “Only a huge fur coat, and I can’t wear that in here…especially since it’s white and people like Mingi exist.”

That made Hongjoong laugh as he nodded, his eyebrows furrowing in thought, “Well, I also suppose you didn’t bring a backup outfit?”

“No, Hongjoong,” You sighed, “Not everyone is as well prepared as you are.”

He hummed knowingly, his office having a wardrobe dedicated to outfits Hongjoong brought in for emergency meetings or occasions. He was well prepared, and most importantly, always well dressed. He had been like that since high school, wearing the edgiest outfits he could find, painting his nails, and experimenting with his hairstyles. Something he hadn’t stopped doing ever since, hence his two-coloured hair at the moment. His middle part was perfect, the left side of his hair bleached blonde while the right side remained a raven black. It looked good on him, too good, and it brought back memories of when he had tried it out for the first time in his final year of college. Just remembering it made you almost blush again, the image of screaming about it into a pillow after running into Hongjoong was still too vivid in your mind.

“Allow me to help you out then, stay here.” Before you could question Hongjoong, he was already out of the room, leaving you alone with your thoughts and a racing heart. What could he possibly have in mind? You had always seen him as a creative person—I mean, he really was considering the fact he was in charge of the graphic design department—and he had never shied away from a little challenge. Except that, he wasn’t facing a challenge right now, and you wondered what he had in mind since it brought that excited glint in his eyes, it happened whenever he thought of something brilliant. Because honestly, all of Hongjoong’s ideas were brilliant. You couldn’t help but admire him for being always ahead of the deadlines and thinking up new innovative ways that made you the best on the market. He was a great asset to your brother’s company, everyone valued and respected Hongjoong for all the dedication and hard work he put into his craft.

You were startled out of your thoughts as Hongjoong returned, holding a satin shirt on a green hanger. He had a grin on his lips as you stood, watching him approach you, ultimately making your heart hammer in your chest.

“So, you can borrow this for the evening.” Hongjoong said with a smile, taking the shirt off the hanger as he came to stand in front of you, “It’ll cover up the stain, and won’t make you feel too warm either.”

“Oh, I…that’s so kind of you, but I can’t accept it—”

“Nonsense,” Hongjoong chuckled, brushing you off without hesitation, “Do you want me to help you wear it?”

That would’ve been really embarrassing, so you quickly shook your head and took the shirt from his hands, your fingers accidentally brushing. Your cheeks were burning, and you avoided looking Hongjoong in the eyes as you carefully wore his shirt, trying to keep your screaming thoughts at bay. This felt like a daydream taken straight out of your teenage years. The seventeen-year-old you would be fainting right now if they were to know this would happen years later, even if Hongjoong wasn’t your boyfriend. The fabric was soft and didn’t feel suffocating, and you tried to ignore Hongjoong’s expensive cologne that seemed to cling to it. It had a hint of sweetness in it, but it was rather masculine and woody otherwise. And despite your family being gifted by the gods of height, you didn’t inherit that gene, which made you smaller than even Hongjoong, who wasn’t the tallest of people. The sleeves of the shirt covered your fingers, only your sparkly red nails visible—which was another scheme pulled by Seonghwa. You rarely did your nails red, let alone sparkly.

“Thank you, Hongjoong.” You said quietly, trying not to chew on your bottom lip since it would ruin your lipgloss, making your teeth tinted. And then, as if your heart wasn’t about to malfunction already, Hongjoong stepped closer to adjust the collar of his shirt. You froze and peeked up at him through your eyelashes, watching as a soft smile appeared on his lips. A few black strands fell into his eyes, and you could tell he had used a bit of dark eyeshadow to sharpen his eyes more, giving it depth. His skin was perfect and his pretty lips were red from the cherry lip balm he’s been using since forever.

“There, now it’s perfect,” Hongjoong muttered more to himself, still smoothing down the collar as he started helping you button up the shirt since you had forgotten you were supposed to do that in the first place. Your fingers trembled slightly from the adrenaline rush in your system, and you bit your bottom lip when your knuckles brushed against Hongjoong’s as your hands met while doing the buttons. Hongjoong huffed in amusement, then grabbed your arms to look at the sleeves. You watched him as you let him do as he wished, and he rolled up the sleeve twice so that it would fit you nicely. He looked gorgeous from up close, especially when he was in his element, doing what he liked the most. Sometimes you wondered why he hadn’t become a stylist, his vision was so beautiful, and you had seen the sketches he had made recently. You just knew his brand would be successful all around the world, his designs delicate and modest, but elegant and full of glamour. Now that the shirt was all done, all you had to do was put the hem inside your pants so that you didn’t look like you had just gotten out of bed and borrowed your boyfriend’s clothes.

You blushed even harder at the thought of Hongjoong being your boyfriend, and you were alarmed to find him already looking at you when you peeked at him. Hongjoong’s ears were redder than before, and he had a sheepish smile on his face. His cheeks were dusted a light pink too, and you wondered if his heart was racing as much as yours. You cleared your throat to thank him for his help when there was a loud knock on the open door, making you both jump. Hongjoong whirled around and awkwardly put some distance between you and himself as Seonghwa’s otherwise round eyes were now sharp and narrowed, a knowing smirk on his lips.

“Would you look at that! The two who were missing from the party, fraternizing in my office…” Seonghwa’s tone had a hint of teasing in it as he raised an eyebrow, his eyes slipping from you to his best friend. Hongjoong laughed awkwardly and rubbed his nape, throwing you a glance before he looked back at Seonghwa.

“I was just—”

“Is that Hongjoong’s shirt?” Seonghwa didn’t let his best friend speak as he pointed at you, now both eyebrows raised in surprise. You nodded, ready to explain yourself, but Seonghwa clearly didn’t care, “Did I miss something? Either way, it looks lovely on you, dear, even if it’s a bit too…roomy?”

“Seonghwa—”

Clearly, when your brother had set his mind onto something, he just wouldn’t listen to anyone, “I’m all for offering my office up to those in need, but maybe you should use Hongjoong’s the next time you want to cosy up. In fact—I might even give you, dear, an office. You’ve earned it after the year we had.”

You narrowed your eyes at your brother, opening your mouth to speak up, but he raised his hand, “Come on now, I’m about to make my speech and you’ll have to swap your presents.”

Right, the presents…for the person you had randomly picked out of a small vase. And that person was…Hongjoong, as cliché as that sounds. You cleared your throat as Seonghwa turned his back to you and Hongjoong, who gave you a curt nod and followed after his best friend in order to give you privacy so you could fix the shirt. You took a deep breath and stuffed the fabric into your pants, glad that you had worn a belt since it cut the outfit in half nicely.

The company was packed with employees, everyone looking excited as Seonghwa made his way towards the fake podium he had giddily asked Hongjoong to make for him. He had a microphone and everything to make it more enjoyable for him, all placed in front of the massive Christmas tree that had been a hassle to get inside the office, but also to decorate. Your brother’s company wasn’t huge, and that was exactly why it worked so well. Everyone was eager to move forward and make something bigger than them, so the community was tight-knit and hard-working. You were on the sales team, not quite in the leader position yet, but you were getting there. You enjoyed what you did and that was all that mattered, plus, the paycheck was pretty nice. And anytime you didn’t like something, you could always bug the CEO until he finally gave in to you…those were the perks of involving your family with your business, much to Seonghwa’s dismay at times.

You took your place behind your tallest co-workers, who were huddled together and watching something on Yunho’s phone. The waiter walked towards you and handed you a glass of champagne to toast with once your brother was done with his speech, and you couldn’t help but grin when Hongjoong came to stand next to you. He returned your grin, and when you looked away, he continued to stare at you with adoration, thinking to himself how cute you looked wearing his shirt. Hongjoong quickly shook his head to clear his thoughts and focus on his best friend, who was standing on the podium made by him, grinning from ear to ear.

“Thank you, everyone, for attending this little party. I am more than elated to announce that we have come close to another end of year where I can confidently say our company’s been doing better than ever. I am proud and happy to have a team so dedicated as you guys, and I hope the next year holds even greater things for us. Maybe the next party will be held on a private island, at the company’s expense, of course.” People chuckled around you, everyone was well aware you weren’t doing that well yet, but that was the goal. Mingi noticed you stood behind him and gave you a pout, making you pat his shoulder as Yunho glanced between you and Hongjoong, then grinned, “We’ve had our ups and downs this year, perhaps have faced even more challenges than before, but with everyone’s help, we pushed through and made the biggest profit of the company so far. I truly am so proud of each one of you, because, without you, I wouldn’t be standing here, able to live the dreams I’ve had since I was a kid. Before I end my speech, I’d like to especially thank Kim Hongjoong for bringing in our biggest partner, and for having great ideas that pushed our company towards success. When we were teenagers, everything that we have today was just a far-fetched dream, and now…we have it, Hongjoong, we did it, brother. I think it’s time we celebrate as we should.”

Everyone cheered as you watched your brother get teary-eyed, looking at Hongjoong with deep respect and love on his face. Hongjoong raised his glass of champagne and tipped it in Seonghwa’s direction, his composure collected, but you could see he had gotten a bit teary-eyed too. You smiled fondly as you watched your brother run his fingers through his long hair, a habit when he was nervous, and then he raised his glass, prompting the others to do so as well.

“Let us celebrate now, but please don’t mess up the electricity wiring like last year, I still have no idea how that happened…” Everyone looked amused as Seonghwa shook his head, then tipped his champagne back, and you followed as you took an experimental sip. It was a bit bitter and too bubbly, but you took a larger gulp out of respect for Seonghwa, “And now, let us open the presents! I hope nobody forgot whose Secret Santa they were!”

Right, the dreaded moment had come. You handed your glass of champagne to Yunho when you noticed he was already finished with his, and he gave you a wink as he quickly downed your champagne too. Now that the moment everyone had been waiting for came, you all migrated towards the big round table that was littered with gifts inside wrapping paper and small winter-themed bags. Yours was a smaller package with a blue font and white snowflakes on it, placed right in the middle of the table. You waited until you made it closer to the table, then leaned over to grab it with sweaty hands. You were nervous, but you were more scared that Hongjoong would hate his present. You truly hoped he didn’t, but then again, even if he did, you’d never be able to tell…Hongjoong had a great poker face. You turned around and looked for him, only to find him already approaching you. Surely, he wasn’t…wait, you quickly looked towards your brother, who was already watching you with an amused smirk. God, this is why you didn’t like telling Seonghwa anything about your crushes…he had always meddled, even back in high school.

You wanted the earth to eat you up as Hongjoong smiled at you sweetly, looking a bit embarrassed as he came to stand in front of you, “So, uh, we meet again.”

God, he could be so awkward at times, you chuckled embarrassed, “Right, as if we weren’t standing next to each other a second ago.”

But you weren’t better either, Mingi and Yunho, who had also somehow picked each other, snorted as they passed by you and Hongjoong, having overheard your conversation. Gosh, this was so embarrassing, you wanted to flip Seonghwa off and then drag him to his office and lecture him. You were pretty sure this wasn’t done by accident, there was no way on earth both Hongjoong and you had picked each other randomly.

“So, I know you don’t like the whole holiday season that much, but uhm, Merry Christmas.” Hongjoong handed you his gift with both hands, his eyes twinkling with excitement, and suddenly you didn’t hate the thought of gift-giving and receiving that much. You took your gift and handed him his.

“Merry Christmas, Hongjoong, and thank you for the gift too.” It felt awkward standing like that there, facing each other like two strangers, so you took your courage in your hands and stepped forward to hug him. Hongjoong’s eyes widened once he realised your intention, but he opened his arms as you came to hold his torso, making sure you wouldn’t dirty his blazer with your makeup despite it being transfer-proof. You could feel your heart hammer against your chest, and you hoped Hongjoong couldn’t feel it as he embraced you, holding you close as suddenly slow music started playing through the speakers. You knew it was Seonghwa’s doing because you could practically feel his eyes on you, but you ignored your annoying brother and focused on Hongjoong’s warmth instead. But to your surprise, he started slowly swaying the two of you to the rhythm of the song, humming next to your ear. You were both still holding your gifts, and the distance between your bodies made it a little awkward, but you weren’t about to say anything. Hongjoong has never held you like this before, you felt like you were soaring through the sky right now as you tried not to inhale loudly, hoping his scent would never leave your nostrils.

“We might as well dance since we are already embracing…” Hongjoong muttered and you hummed, stepping closer so that you could hold each other better. Your face was beat red and your stomach was doing back flips, but you were smiling so widely your cheeks hurt. You couldn’t be too sure that Hongjoong liked you back, there were small moments when he had tried getting closer or did something that was beyond a friendly gesture, but you didn’t want to face heartbreak in case this was just a one-sided crush…which it most probably was. You didn’t really think he’d finally notice you after all those years you had known each other, you also didn’t think you were much his type. He had always dated people who were like him, creative and basically in love with life, happy to be alive and ready to discover everything. You were more of the quiet type, content with living a comfortable life and never going out of your way to do too much. You liked your space and security, planning ahead and having a vision that would help you stay aligned with your purpose and wishes. Hongjoong wasn’t as organised and he went with the flow, unafraid and unapologetic. And despite the two of you being so different, you couldn’t help but find him the most interesting person you had ever come across.

            After an hour or so of dancing and enjoying your time with your co-workers, you were ready to take a breather. It was too cold outside and you were too overheated to go out, you couldn’t risk catching a cold right around the holidays, so you went back to the round table and took a seat, reaching for a clean cup to pour some peach juice for yourself. You didn’t get the chance to open your gift from Hongjoong yet, so, you grabbed it off the table again and looked through it, your eyes widening when you realised what Hongjoong had gotten for you. You had a bunny at home, a sweet little white thing called Star because it was supposed to be Seonghwa’s initially, but he had discovered he was allergic to her, so he had to give her away. Seonghwa and you had always loved bunnies, so your brother knew she was in safe hands with you. And Hongjoong, the always thoughtful person, had bought various treats for your little Star. But that wasn’t everything, a pink princess costume was packed neatly inside the bag as well, making you grin from ear to ear. Star would look lovely in that, Seonghwa will absolutely love it too once you send him pictures.

But that wasn’t all as you reached inside to grab the small jewellery box, your mouth felt a little bit dry. You paused and looked around, wanting to make sure no one was watching you, but secretly you were also looking for Hongjoong. He was on the dance floor, entertaining Yunho and Mingi who were spinning him around. Hongjoong’s cheeks were red and he kept laughing, the contagious sound reached your ears and made you smile as something warm spread through your chest. Gosh, sometimes you really wish you didn’t have a crush on the most adorable man in the whole world. Glancing back down at your last gift, you braced yourself and opened it up, only for your jaw to drop open. There, in the dainty box, sat a rose gold necklace with a diamond pendant. It wasn’t the fact that Hongjoong had gifted you a diamond necklace that made your heart race, but the fact that you’ve always wanted one in this style. Maybe some would consider you shallow, but you have always liked diamonds. They were gorgeous in the light, and if the stone wasn’t too big, it looked gorgeous. You gulped, suddenly overwhelmed with emotions because you had been mentioning the fact that you’d want to buy yourself a diamond necklace once you could afford it ever since you were just a little kid. To be fair, you had always thought Seonghwa would be the one to surprise you and gift you this, but coming from Hongjoong…you tried to gulp down the lump in your throat.

This wasn’t helping with your one-sided crush, because now all you wanted to do was run up to Hongjoong and kiss him while you cried. The fact that he had even paid enough attention to remember your biggest wish managed to knock you breathless, you needed a second to gather yourself. Your hands shook slightly as you raised it to your eyes, taking in the pendant, and admiring its beauty. It was perfect. The same size and shape you had always envisioned, it was modest and gorgeous. You released a shuddering breath just as you realised someone was approaching you, and your eyes were a little watery as you looked up. Seonghwa had a soft smile on his lips as he walked up to you, and then crouched down in front of you.

“Hey,” He greeted you softly, looking down at the necklace in your hands. He didn’t even seem surprised, he looked pleased as he hummed, looking back up at you, “You opened your presents, I see. I bet you love it, don’t you?”

“It’s a diamond necklace, Hwa,” You whispered, eyes widening slightly, “From Hongjoong. This is…crazy. I know I’ve been mentioning it for ages, but I didn’t think that he…”

Seonghwa raised his eyebrows at you as you trailed off, seemingly lost for words, “That he was listening? Hongjoong has always paid attention to you, dear.”

Really? Was that true? Seonghwa wouldn’t lie to you, you felt your heart race all of a sudden. Seonghwa reached out and took the necklace from your hands, walking around you once he stood up. He pulled your hair to the side and clipped the necklace in place, making you reach up to touch the pendant. It was the perfect length too, why was Hongjoong so perfect when he couldn’t even be yours? You sniffed and willed your tears to go away, pouting a little as Seonghwa walked around to come face-to-face with you again. He grinned and grabbed your hands, pulling you up.

“Don’t cry, you’ll ruin your pretty makeup,” He teased you with a wink and you groaned, bottling your feelings up for later, when you were alone and in the safety of your apartment, where only Star could witness your crying session, “I know it’s not technically Christmas yet and that we’ll see each other back home in less than three days for the annual feast, but I got you a present too.”

See, there was no denying that Seonghwa and you were siblings. You grinned and reached inside your pants pocket, grabbing the Spa Coupon you had gotten for him.

“You deserve to relax, you’ve done a lot for the company.” Seonghwa patted your head, messing up your hair a little bit in true brother fashion, “And you can’t use your phone while you’re there, dear, that’s not how you relax.”

Seonghwa handed over the small ticket, and you stared at it for a second before you burst out laughing. His eyebrows furrowed as he watched you, but then his face turned incredulous before he started laughing too once you handed him your gift for him. Seonghwa had bought you a Spa Coupon too, from the same place you had bought his too. You laughed as you waved your coupons at each other, already knowing you’d get a scolding from your mother for not being a bit more creative with your gifts.

“Wait, don’t tell me you got one for mom too…” Seonghwa trailed off, his eyes widening slightly.

“Let me guess, you got one for dad too?” You raised an eyebrow and Seonghwa nodded innocently, prompting you to shake your head as you both snickered.

“Well, seems like we’ll be spending some quality time as a family over the break.” Seonghwa grinned, pocketing his coupon, and then he placed his hands behind his back, looking somewhere behind you.

“Ugh, great, now mom won’t get off my back about me finding a boyfriend somehow finally.” You grimaced, not keen on going home only to listen to your mother’s nagging. She never stopped asking, never stopped trying to set you up on blind dates. It was annoying because she never did that for Seonghwa…at least you had a crush, he couldn’t even bother with that.

“Speaking of boyfriends…” Seonghwa wriggled his eyebrows and you groaned, ready to deny whatever he was about to say, but it wasn’t what you were expecting, “Did you notice you were sitting under a mistletoe?”

“What?” You muttered, looking up confused. Now how the hell did that get there? If you reckon correctly, it wasn’t there like half an hour ago, you had come to the table to grab a drink and it wasn’t there, so how—Seonghwa. The answer was always Seonghwa, “I swear to God, Hwa, you’re my brother. What are you plotting? I refuse to peck even as much as your cheek.”

“I won’t even get a hug?” Seonghwa fake pouted, his eyes glinting wickedly. Nothing good came when Seonghwa had that look in his eyes, you gulped nervously.

“No, now—”

“Fine.” Seonghwa sighed exaggeratedly, “Hate me all you want, but I’m the best brother in the world. If you won’t show me some love, I know exactly who else you could cheer up right now—Hongjoong, can you come over for a little bit?!”

Your eyes widened and you whacked Seonghwa in the chest, turning around frantically. Oh no, Hongjoong was already approaching with a skip in his step, unassuming of what he was walking up to. His cheeks were flushed and his hair was deliciously brushed back, his blazer gone and the top buttons of his shirt undone.

“Yeah? You need something?” He called as he walked around the table and Seonghwa stepped aside, making your eyes widen.

“Sure, come here for a second,” Seonghwa said nonchalantly, and by the time you opened your mouth to tell Hongjoong not to fall for Seonghwa’s trap, it was too late. Seonghwa stepped aside and lightly pushed Hongjoong towards you, making both of you panic as you grabbed Hongjoong’s arm so he wouldn’t accidentally fall.

“What—”

“Attention, everyone!” Seonghwa called loudly, shouting over the music, and you were terrified. Hongjoong looked rather confused and looked at you for an answer that you couldn’t formulate at the moment, “We have our first couple under the mistletoe for the night! Now, kiss!”

Everyone was watching the two of you now, and you wanted to strangle Seonghwa as he smirked at you pleased, throwing him a wink when Hongjoong gave your brother a flabbergasted look. He slowly looked up, then back at you, and you started sweating.

“Uhm, we don’t have to, obviously. This tradition is silly, I don’t—”

But it was too late, the whole office was chanting, “Kiss, kiss, kiss!”

Hongjoong had turned red in the face, it went down even to his neck. He gulped and chuckled awkwardly, and you felt horrible. Of course, he wouldn’t want to kiss you, this was terrible and you felt humiliated. Just as you were about to excuse yourself and run off, Hongjoong cleared his throat.

“Well, this isn’t how I wished for our first kiss to happen, but…” He motioned around himself, at all the people staring at you expectantly, “May I kiss you?”

“You—I’m sorry, but—you want to kiss me?” You sputtered out, feeling a bit lightheaded.

“I’ve wanted to for ages.” Hongjoong chuckled and scratched the back of his head. He was blushing and so were you, your heart thudding in your chest as Hongjoong licked his lips, waiting for your answer.

“Yes, okay, yeah, kiss me, Hongjoong.” Damn Seonghwa and everyone else for cheering upon hearing your words, but maybe it was worth it as Hongjoong giggled while leaning in, his eyes fluttering closed. His lips were soft and tasted like cherry, and you felt like pudding as your lips locked in an innocent peck that lasted for a second too long. You felt like a teenager all over again, and if seventeen years old you could catch a glimpse into the future and see this exact moment, she’d definitely pass out.

“So, do you want to go on a date tomorrow?”

“God, yes, Hongjoong, please.”

Yeah, seventeen-year-old you would not survive this.

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❀ complete the forms if you're interested! ^^

[suniverseastro]

ASTROLOGY OBSERVATION #14

Mars in the 2nd house is very possessive

Moon Aquarius is easy to sympathize with those around, although they may have many bad qualities, they will often be ignored by people because of their support in the team. Some in this group when they don't like someone and hate openly can easily recognize their feelings, these people can play bad tricks like using crowds, councils to bully

Here are some of the positions that I don't like very much, doesn't mean they will all be the same and I hate everyone with this aspect, it just brings some difficulties and disadvantages, takes a lot of time time to recognize and transform it:

1. Moon Square/Opposite Pluto: often emotionally volatile and explosive, has difficulty controlling anger, may experience more bad luck with women

2. Moon square / Opposite Uranus: actually this is one of the most horrible corners for me because as far as I know and actually it means about their separation from the mother physically or mentally

3. Venus square/opposite Mars: causes sexual attraction but often changes partners too quickly and gets nowhere

4. Mars Libra: passive in problem solving. The house in this position plays an important role, like the one who moves the pieces tactically. I think it is necessary to add other angles to strengthen this position, especially Pluto to increase ambition and determination.

5. Venus Gemini: often emotional, easy to play emotional roller coaster with others, unpredictable, interesting, but for me this is not a very good position in love, they easily find it difficult. hard to find the right person

6. Moon square/Opposite Saturn: often encounters problems in childhood such as abandonment, working in a difficult, deprived environment, shouldering responsibility, loneliness; They have quite a lot of psychological damage, rarely share, confide, and find it difficult to open their hearts to others. When they learn to be less strict with themselves and learn to accept and love themselves, the door in their souls will lead them to the good things that are waiting for them on the other side of their hearts.

7. Venus square/opposite Uranus: feel less interested in wanting a relationship Some positions I like:

Moon trine/sextile Pluto: I once wished to have this aspect because it gives the ability to read other people's psyches and understand emotions deeply and they themselves also have a protective covering for their minds. mine

Sun trine/sextile Pluto: have their own privilege in society, they can be people whose image others consider as an authority and important figure, admire; Their passion is strong and they will try to do it

Mercury conjunct/ trine/ sextile Neptune: they have acumen, speciality and development in language, can know 2 or more languages, have artistic abilities, their voices are quite cute

Venus trine/sextile Mars: they easily radiate sexual attraction to other people (regardless of gender), which makes it easier for them to have relationships

Ascendant trine/sextile/conjunct Mercury: usually curious, cheerful, child-like eager people, they often have an active, playful appearance.

Ascendant trine/sextile/conjunct Sun: confident, shine, positive energy

Moon in Sagittarius/9th: very active, cheerful, likable, open and optimistic, they respect others and different cultures and religions

Mercury in Gemini: funny people, lots of topics to talk to, easy to talk to anyone, except people they don't like

Mercury conjunct/trine/sextile Pluto: their voice has charm, weight, usually straight to the point, analytical, inquisitive and rarely afraid of knowledge and reason

Moon sextile Venus: cute girls and boys, graceful words, pleasant, non-aggressive, cohesive and peaceful

(a position can't say who you are, everything will change, maybe for the better, maybe for the worse) try to take a deep breath and try to feel the peaceful moment in the present

Thank you everyone for inspiring me to write articles on this topic. Thank you for your love for me; love you all. Wishing you all good health, peace and luck ⭐

[mydreamchapter]

the angel of warmth

pairing: yeonjun x gender neutral reader

genre: fluff with comfort!

word count: 3k

age rating: mature - mdni

tags: pet names, implied sex, reader was going through a shitty breakup

The morning air came with a chill bite, but it stood no chance against the pleasant heat radiating from the sleeping angel next to you. Yeonjun was like a mug of hot chocolate; warm and sweet, comforting in the cold, cozy, so delectable you wished you could drink him. So you tried to, in any way possible, turning toward him and wrapping your arms around his waist to spoon him, and gently kissing the spot where his neck met his back. He stirred slightly from the sensation, but was definitely still asleep. You could probably fall back asleep too, if you wanted to, but the mug in your arms was comforting in a way that you felt you had to be awake to fully appreciate. So you nestled your cheek against his back and gently tangled your legs with his, drinking in his warmth with your whole body through his soft blue sweatshirt and sweatpants. 

“Honey,” he said, and you could feel the depth of his morning voice in your cheek. He found your hand and slotted his fingers between yours, his palm against the back of your hand. “Honey, you’re so comfy.”

“You’re so comfy, angel,” you said.

“But it’s not fair,” he said, and you could hear the pout in his voice. “You could keep me in bed forever.”

“Lucky you, we both have the day off.” 

“Thank god,” he said with a sigh, and pressed his back against you more. He hummed happily. 

Yeonjun wasn’t always there in the mornings, but he always happened to be there when you needed him the most. You’d been scared about the one-year anniversary since the terrible breakup you went through last winter — you’d never felt colder and more alone when it happened. Things had fallen apart with so little warning that you always worried everything was always capable of falling apart so suddenly the same way, again and again, no matter how good things seemed to be going. 

But right then and there, you were just happy to have someone this wonderful in your arms. 

“How are you feeling, honey?” He asked knowingly. 

—

Yeonjun was the first person you called after the breakup. You had been so distraught that you left your shared apartment with your now-ex into the heavy chill of an early winter evening in just the sweatshirt and pants you’d already been wearing to wander in the night and try to clear your head, your now-ex’s car now off-limits, and called the first person you could think of. 

Yeonjun was your closest friend in this city; you met at a painting club when you thought you should take it up as a new hobby. Of course, you weren’t very good, because you’d never been much of an artist, but it seemed like the intimidatingly gorgeous man next to you already had a background in art and was picking it up really quickly. You quickly discovered that he wasn’t actually intimidating — when you struggled and got discouraged, he would give you little tips and encouragement, and brighten your mood with his smile and the faint scent of whatever soap or perfume he had that smelled like sweet cinnamon. Things had blossomed into friendship after you kept coming back to the painting club week after week, always sitting next to the handsome face you knew would encourage you. You thought maybe that was just his personality, maybe he was always this nice to everyone, but he didn’t interact with the other people in the club nearly as much as he talked to you. You exchanged numbers one day when you knew you’d be gone on a trip with your partner the following week, so that he could send you a picture of his own painting of the week when he finished it. 

So when your life started falling apart before your eyes with your ex in the center of it, it was instinctual to call him first. He’d known you were dating someone happily, and he knew a few base level details about your life, but nothing vulnerable that would have warranted him driving out into the city to pick you up so you could stay at his apartment for the time being — which is what he did. 

“You don’t have to show me your pity,” you’d said when you sat down in the passenger seat, “you didn’t have to do this.” But when you arrived at his apartment, he gave you a blanket, a warm sweatshirt fresh from the dryer, and he washed a bowl of blueberries for you to eat with honey while he made you hot chocolate. 

Of course, all you could do that night was cry; on and off, on and off, while Yeonjun stayed by your side. “You don’t have to do this, it’s not necessary,” you kept repeating, but you put on the sweatshirt, you clung to the blanket wrapped around your shoulders, you ate the blueberries and honey, and you sipped the thermos of hot chocolate. 

If you’d known him better at the time, you would have spilled your guts, and vomited out all the hurt you were feeling and all of the terrible things your ex had just spewed at you before shutting you out completely. But you were scared to talk and look at all of it, scared to acknowledge what had happened even though the consequences of it were following you at every moment, and you didn’t even know where to start; so you sat on his couch and cried for hours, and he never left your side except to make you another hot chocolate once you had finished the thermos. 

He offered to hug you that night, once. But you weren’t really keen on people touching you other than romantic partners, especially when you felt as vulnerable as you did in that moment. Even someone as beautiful as him. You explained this to him, minus the beautiful part, and he made sure to keep a line drawn between you that wouldn’t be crossed except for you reaching for the tissue box in his hands.

When you moved to this city to live with your partner, you didn’t know anyone else. You were ready to start a fresh new life, away from your toxic past and the ghosts of terrible people haunting you, so you could meet new people and find a happier life with your partner. But you always struggled making friends, and Yeonjun was the only person you’d managed to befriend in the full year since you’d moved here, aside from your ex’s friends that probably wouldn’t want to talk to you anymore. Yeonjun was the only person you had now in this city. Sure, there was your boss at work and your coworkers who knew you, but they weren’t the type of people you’d prefer to spend your free time around. 

The day after the breakup, your ex made it clear you were no longer welcome in the apartment, and gave you one day to move out. With nowhere else to go, Yeonjun cleared up a corner in his apartment for you to put the few things you decided to take with you, and told you his couch was yours to sleep in for as long as you needed it. You reiterated that he didn’t need to pity you, didn’t need to sacrifice space in his own home or take time out of his day to make sure you were okay, but he just shook his head and did it anyway. 

The morning of day three at his apartment and day three of you calling out of work, you finally asked before he left for work for the day. “You barely know me. Why are you doing all this for me?”

He clicked his tongue. “It’s not like we’re strangers; you’re my friend, of course I would want to help you during a tough time. And who else would? You said you don’t really have other friends in the city,” he said, and you frowned. “You have a good soul. It shines through your paintings, it’s clear in your attitude. You deserve good things.” You wanted to argue, but you knew it wouldn’t be fair. If he wanted to help you, that was his choice. It’s not like you had begged him for help or anything, either; all you had asked was for him to be a listening ear about your breakup. 

He stuck some bread in the toaster oven, left blueberry jam, butter, and honey on the table, and left for work. “I’ll make you another hot chocolate tonight,” he said.

That night, when he put down the thermos of hot chocolate on the coffee table in front of you, you said quietly, “can I ask for a hug now?” The temperature outside was dropping day by day, and every moment you spent alone you could feel yourself dropping, too.

“Of course,” he said, and he sat down on the couch next to you to hug you; this is when you discovered how it wasn’t just his soul that was warm. You buried your face in his chest, trying not to cry again, feeling frail and weak, clinging to the warm body in front of you that was holding you tight in his arms. 

“They were sick of me,” you finally admitted, still hiding your face in his chest. “They had all these problems with me and never brought them up even once. Never gave me the chance to fix them. Just got fed up and gave up, no second chances. And now they’re gone. I keep thinking that maybe if I give them time, it’ll click and they’ll realize how unfair they’re being to me, that maybe they’ll learn to communicate their frustrations in a healthy way,” you said. Yeonjun rubbed your back slowly. “It hurts. How could they just hide how much they were growing to hate me until it was too late? I thought we were fine and dandy, I thought maybe I’d propose to them next year. But they let their frustrations fester so much that they decided nothing was worth saving.” You were quiet for a moment. “Even if they did realize they’re in the wrong, no matter how long I waited, I don’t think they’d come back to me.” It stung like hell to admit, but you felt it to be true deep in your bones. 

“I think it’s for the best,” Yeonjun said slowly. “You deserve someone who cares enough about your relationship to put effort into keeping it healthy. You deserve to be cherished, not tolerated. And you deserve the opportunity to grow.”

You let him hold you like that for a long time, soaking in his temperature and letting him comfort you. It was the first time you’d let anyone other than a partner hug you in years. He still smelled like cinnamon, too, especially from up close, and you realized it was his perfume scent. You’d spotted the bottle in his bathroom before but hadn’t thought to look closely at it.

“Cinnamon,” you said, without explanation, just trying to ground yourself in the moment. 

“Do you want cinnamon in your hot chocolate? I have cinnamon sugar.”

You pulled away from him to look at his face, the low lighting in the room casting shadows on his face that emphasized his perfect features. Maybe he really was an angel. You drank cinnamon hot chocolate that night, and he made it for you like that from then on. 

On morning number four, Yeonjun accidentally slept in late. Couldn’t sleep from work stress, he’d said. You watched him make himself a coffee and pour it into a travel mug he’d take to work. 

“You always make me hot chocolate, but you make coffee for yourself,” you pointed out. You felt like there should be a question behind the statement, but you couldn’t figure out which question to ask. Did he not like hot chocolate? And if so, why did he always make it for you? He never offered coffee, did he think you didn’t like it? Why was hot chocolate his first instinct to make for you when he picked you up from the middle of the city that night?

“My mom used to make me hot chocolate when I had a bad day as a kid. I hope it’s comforting for you, too,” he said simply. “The coffee in the morning is to help me get through the day. And I’m really going to need the extra boost today.”

So that evening, when you knew Yeonjun would be home soon from work, you decided to make him a hot chocolate. You’d watched him do it enough times that by now you knew where the chocolate and the sugar was, and you knew which mug was his favorite, and you knew how long he warmed up the milk. So when he walked in and put his things down, exhausted and totally beat, you handed him the hot chocolate, and he just looked at you in surprise. 

“Can I hug you?” He asked, and you nodded and took him in your arms.

Yeonjun really was like an angel, one who’d fallen out of the sky to look after you in your hardest moment. You were looking at his face and your hands were on his back, but you swear you could almost see the halo and feel the feathers sprouting out from his back. 

You definitely thought of him as an angel when you were finally able to find a new apartment and he helped you move in, find new furniture, and get settled. 

You still thought of him as an angel every time you met at the painting club again and he offered his gentle words of advice and encouragement. 

You still thought of him as an angel a few months after the breakup when he spent the day after Valentine’s, what he called “St. Single’s Day,” driving you around the city and showing you his favorite spots, something your ex had never even done since they never seemed to have the energy to show you anything other than the bare minimum.

You still thought of him as an angel the third evening in a row you spent at his apartment that March, not even needing to ask what he wanted from the takeout place a few blocks away or if he was hungry in the first place, because of course he was hungry, the man had a black hole for a stomach; but this time when you came through the door with hands full of styrofoam containers of cheap Chinese food and he cracked a joke about you being a perfect partner, you felt your face flush. You caught yourself staring at the pout of his lips while he scrolled on his phone after all the food had been eaten during commercials in the middle of Wheel of Fortune.

You still thought of him as an angel that May when you kissed those lips for the first time on an evening walk by the river downtown, and he sighed happily into your mouth, his lips soft and eager and heavenly on yours, his hands gentle but wanting against your skin.

You still thought of him as an angel that August the first time you let his warm hands wander up your legs while you sat sideways in his lap watching a cheesy romcom on the couch, his fingers traveling slowly between your thighs, and then up to your waistband and down again inside your underwear while you gave him small encouraging kisses, his brown eyes drinking in the way you melted under his heat, clinging to him as you sighed his name into his ear over and over.

—

And you still thought of him as an angel now, on the one year anniversary since your ex broke up with you. 

“I feel warm,” you answered, and noticed the morning light from the window shining a backlight on Yeonjun’s golden hair. He turned to face you. His hair was perfectly tousled from sleep, in a way that you wished you could preserve its perfectness and its soft backlit shine in your memory like a picture. But you also wanted to touch it, so you reached behind his ear and tangled your fingers in his hair to pet him. This made him smile, his soft cheeks plumping up in the most kissable way. So you did; you leaned in and kissed his cheek, and he turned his face until he caught your lips with his own, and pulled you close. You kissed him eagerly, wrapping your legs around his, and he tugged your hair gently in response.

It still hurt, though. Being abandoned the way you were abandoned last year doesn’t just heal in an instant, or even a full year. You still felt hesitant to call Yeonjun your boyfriend; even just saying the word still made you feel terrified. 

Yeonjun could sense your thoughts start to wander through your kisses. “Hey,” he said softly, breaking away, and ran his thumb over your cheek. “Hot chocolate?” He offered. He hadn’t made it for you in several months.

“With cinnamon, please,” you said, and he got up.

“All I ask from you in return is to not let the bed get cold,” he said. 

“Aye, aye,” you said, and sprawled your body across the soft sheets. 

You wished it was easy to just let the past go. You wished it was easier to just move on from the pain. You weren’t sure where the future would take you, but you hoped it involved blueberries, honey, hot chocolate, cinnamon, and the angel of warmth that fell from heaven.

a/n: thank you for reading my first fic on tumblr! this was totally self indulgent so i hope it was enjoyable in some way to you too :) let me know if you liked it!

[vaguesxrrow]

Hello! Love your Edwin works!! Anyways, can I request a Edwin x alive!reader or ghost but they appear to be aloof 24/7 but has a soft spot for him, like it’s a complete opposite personality of them. For example they get flustered when they’re near him or being teased by him etc. It could be HCs or in fic form. Thanks in advance! -🖤

HELLOO loved this req ty sm, here u go xx

edwin / reader - soft spot

a/n: tried my best to not make reader seem mean, just detached but still kind

tags: gender neutral reader, alive reader, aloof reader

- you meet everyone when you move in to jenny's butcher shop

- really, you chose the place because jenny herself seemed about as non-invasive and private as you were - you just wished she'd warned you about her two (four, counting the dead ones) other tenants

- first, you met niko and crystal as they were exiting niko's room, both sipping tea from pink cups

- they were nice and all, but your responses were terse as they tried to break the ice

- niko asked you where you were from, you gave the vague response of "not far from here", and she then started talking about japan before remembering a detail she thought crystal would like

- you took that opportunity to slip into your room and lock the door behind you

- later, crystal and niko would tell edwin and charles about their new neighbour:

- crystal: they seemed... aloof. didn't seem very interested in small talk.

- edwin, of course, found this a bit suspicious and had to investigate

- what he didn't anticipate was you being able to see him as he walked through your wall while you were unpacking

- you startled when he stuck his head in through your wallpaper

- "i'm sorry, are you lost?" you exclaimed. "in what world is it acceptable to just- oh."

- your voice kind of gave way at the end as edwin fully stepped inside, an excuse already on his lips

- your first impression was god, he was cute

- of course, you already knew about ghosts from your near death experience; besides, it was hard not to notice them, as they seemed to walk through things very often without thinking. so you weren't fazed.

- in fact, you were the opposite - you smiled at him and asked his name after introducing yourself, still a bit breathless

- edwin was such a pretty name, you thought

- "so, uh... is this apartment building one of your usual haunts?" you cringed at the pun

- the corners of his mouth quirked upwards, but only briefly. you wondered how he would look laughing

- edwin, on his part, was also rather taken by you

- edwin: i must say, i find myself rather charmed by your unexpected friendliness

- you were nothing like the description crystal and niko had given him, and he would tell you so

- for the first time in your life, you would feel warmth rise to your cheeks

- "same.. i mean, it's nice to have a neighbour as cute as you-" you cut yourself off, even more embarrassed

- imagine edwin cocking his head to the side, eyebrow raised but otherwise silent, which just makes you ramble more to make it less awkward

- "it's just nice to have neighbours in general, and uh, i should really start organising so it isn't such a mess the next time you're over..."

- your rambling benefits you in the end, because edwin excuses himself with the promise he'll definitely be over again - this time arranged in advance

- did you just score yourself a date? who knows.

- as he leaves, he would definitely call you "interesting" and tell you he looks forward to talking in the future

- when he returns to his friends, he would tell them that you seemed completely pleasant and maybe even a bit alluring

- charles would definitely check him over for any signs of a hex, but it becomes apparent to all of them that he really just has a crush on you

- after you meet charles, too, he would definitely tell edwin, "everyone likes me eventually, but when is eventually going to happen with [name]?"

- edwin: they seem perfectly amiable to me. very thoughtful, too

- charles is stunned, because your first meeting consisted of you just staring at him as he explained he was best friends with edwin, leaving him with a "that's nice," and a pointed look as you left

- ofc there are many more moments where crystal, charles, and niko look at you around edwin and think, "what the fuck?"

- eg: after a few months of you living there, and after you've become accustomed to the town, edwin asks for your help on a case as it happens to be related to a library you frequent

- he approaches you together with crystal, niko, and charles

- you agree to helping with a small smile, touched that he trusts you enough

- when you traipse to the library, edwin teasingly asks, "so, is this one of your usual haunts?"

- you choke at the reminder of your tactless first attempt at flirting

- charles, niko, and crystal are a bit speechless at your reaction, to which you half glare at them and say "it's nothing."

- overall, though, everyone thinks it's cute that you're so flustered by edwin. at first, they're really just cheering for edwin to find a healthy relationship, but eventually everyone sees how good you two are for each other

- and you are - edwin sees how, despite your disinterested demeanor, you are a kind person and care about him a lot, your affection going beyond him being the only one to actually make you laugh

- he loves you just as much, by the way, and would be the first to vouch for your character as well as the first to greet you, with a hug and a cheek kiss

[wannaeatramyeon]

Hi~ can I request "committed relationship with lookism boys" headcannons (such as samuel, jake, gun, eli)? Sorry if it's too much and thank you in advance! 💙

Hi anon, thanks for the ask and sorry for the delay! Of course you can but how dare you leave off our Goofy and also Viiiin. I've got quite a few hc floating around (latest one here for almost everyone). Let's do committed committed though.

Do I have to mention that I hc most of the Lookism guys as romantics in their own way?

Lookism Boys in committed relationships (longer term etc.)

The usual - Sammy, Jake, Gun, Eli, Goo, Vin

Samuel Seo

Being in a committed relationship, or really a relationship at all isn't something he has thought much about but with the right person it can work.

He wants the whole thing - engagement, marriage, kids.

Proposal would be something more traditional and romantic than you would expect.

Likely booking out the fanciest restaurant, enjoying a candlelit dinner followed shortly with Sammy down on one knee with a diamond ring the size of your fist.

Honestly, everything would be a little bit of a spectacle. Used as much to express his love to you as well as his power and status so it's not going to be quiet or chill.

Wants someone that will stay by his side and wants all the formalities to go with it.

The piece of paper saying you're legally married, in sickness and in health, for better or worse would mean a lot to him, though he would never express it.

As always with this guy, fingers crossed he's had a buttload of therapy especially before any kids come along.

Jake Kim

Hmm, let's leave anything longer term until after he retires from Big Deal.

Obviously a romantic, though he does not want a repeat of his dad, where he leaves you at home and he's off gallivanting doing gangster shit.

It goes without saying but to clarify: Jake is a one woman man. If he's in a relationship with you, nothing will ever make him turn his head.

Like Sammy, wants to experience everything with you by his side. The marriage, the kids, the growing old together.

As the head of Big Deal though, he knows that he would not be able to give you the attention you deserve.

Doesn't ask you to wait for him, he could never get in the way of your happiness though he desperately wishes that you would.

And of course you do, it's Jake!

Meeting his mother, that force of a woman, wife of Gapryong Kim, might be the most intimidating experience of your life. You leave in awe and a little in love with her yourself.

Gun Park

Actually did think marriage would be on the cards, although one of convenience rather than love.

(It would come as a very pleasant and welcome surprise that his life turns out that way.)

If it was an arranged/convenient marriage then you'll barely see him tbh. And he would expect an open marriage.

If Gun loves you, then this guy is traditional as hell in a committed relationship, and a romantic too.

Will get you a gifts sent to your work, bouquet of roses, or just buy you something because it reminds him of you. Remembers anniversaries and make sure there is something special prepared.

That antique necklace you said you liked in passing? It's on your pillow the next day. That place you said you wanted to see? You're going that weekend.

Yes to engagement, yes to marriage, yes to kids.

The proposal would be something very specific and sentimental to you both. The wedding, less so. He has a lot of customs he would need to follow being head of the Yamazaki Clan and Gun being who he is.

With kids, doesn't matter what gender, Gun would mould them to be his masterpiece.

Eli Jang

Quite honestly didn't expect a long term or committed relationship to be on the cards. (He should really be focusing on Yenna instead of gallivanting around playing loan shark with 5A - ahem).

Most responsible parents would take a while before introducing you to their kid, but with Eli - has the vibe that oh shit something has come up with 5A and will dump Yenna on you.

What can I say, it's been obvious that this guy's logic and critical thinking isn't his strong point.

Doesn't really care for all the formalities of long term relationships, the expectation of marriage but isn't opposed to it. Besides, it would be good to have the extra bit of added stability for Yenna.

Would have a small intimate wedding with just the nearest and dearest.

Likely to also get a couples tattoo too (have you seen the H on his FOREHEAD? That guy is BOLD.)

Can't imagine him actually wanting more kids, the first time round was traumatic enough.

However, if you really want more then he will consider it. Especially because it would be pretty cute for Yenna to be the older sis.

Goo Kim

Hard to get this guy to commit to you in the first place. He generally only has one thought: mind on his money and money on his mind.

Will be hard for this guy to admit his feelings for you, and whether he truly misses you or if it's just his clingy nature.

Once in a relationship, expect to be spoiled. What's the point of making all this if you can't enjoy it? And even though the gifts might not be to your taste (and in all honesty, pretty ostentatious), it's the thought that counts.

With long term plans, Goo is pretty easy-going and happy to go with the flow.

If you want to get married, just say the word. A little backyard wedding or hiring the most expensive wedding in Seoul - go for it.

Want a lil sparkle on your ring finger or none at all, also fine too.

Hint: best wedding present for him? Get him some swords.

Fence-sitter with kids, but if you want them then he can be swayed. Let's just enjoy more of our youth and our freedom first.

Vin Jin

Ahhh he's a secret cheeseball. Although maybe it's not so secret. He is SOFT for you, in his own standoffish way. Thinks he's cool about it but it's obvious to everyone.

Doesn't think too much long term and doesn't feel the need to get married. He's committed to you, he shows you, he tells you and feels that that's enough.

More likely for you guys to get hitched with a quickie wedding where you may or may not be drunk.

And then the morning after and nursing a hangover, Vin thinks huh. This is sorta nice.

You guys don't really do the engagement ring or wedding ring thing. There'll be something just as sentimental like a couples necklace.

Besides, who wouldn't be able to tell you're together with your constant couple outfits.

Kids? Ehh. Vin likes the idea of them but not the responsibility. If it'll happen, it'll happen.

[yanderes-galore]

Hiiii, could I request Platonic (Familial type) Yandere headcanons of Larry from Pokemon Scarlet and Violet, please? Thank you and I hope you're doing alright! ദ്ദി ˉ͈̀꒳ˉ͈́ )✧

Ah... I suppose he is kinda dad material, lol. I struggled a bit as I just don't see him as yandere material... but I hope you enjoy it despite the wait!

Yandere! Platonic! Larry Concept

Pairing: Platonic

Possible Trigger Warnings: Gender-Neutral Darling, Obsession, Overprotective behavior, Manipulation, Isolation, Dubious companionship, he's very tame.

I am almost unsure of how to go with this due to Larry's character.

He's so overworked with all his jobs and is quite literally... average.

He doesn't seem like he'd have it in him to be that aggressive of a yandere.

The most I can think is he'd be an excellent manipulator due to no one suspecting a darker side.

Despite all this... he would work for a platonic role in his obsession's life.

Like a mentor role.

Perhaps you challenge him as a student from the school and have decided to stick beside him.

Something that confuses him quite a lot.

Yet despite his confusion, Larry actually enjoys your company as a trainer and student.

He's always so busy... but seeing you meet up with him during work is a pleasant surprise.

Sometimes he gets so tired and hates dealing with others... but you manage to cheer him up a bit.

Larry no doubt sees you as his kid in some way for this concept.

He's way too busy to have a dating life, let alone have a child of his own.

So in a way... you're his kid in his eyes.

He allows you to come to him if you wish to talk or battle.

Larry's still very surprised you'd rather stay around him than any of the other Gym Leaders.

He can easily think of people more interesting to talk to.

Yet, no, you wish to talk to him... because he's so normal.

Or so you think.

Larry as a platonic yandere no doubt is protective.

It's evident when you speak to him about problems you're having at the Academy.

For example, maybe you have someone harassing you?

Larry has connections to the Academy... so he can speak a few words and claim how he's worried about you.

All while he comforts you the best he can.

Larry would genuinely hug you as you rant to him, your problems are struggles everyone experiences during life... so he'll help.

He would hate it if people made his protective behavior towards you a big deal.

He's just... looking out for you as a mentor figure.

He is not a big threat, you can barely call his behavior "Yandere" without going out of character too much.

The most Larry would do is manipulate you away from others.

Think... social isolation.

He gives you his phone number and often invites you to be around him.

He can help you with school, he can offer chat and comfort, soon he's manipulating you away from family and friends.

You really do ease his stress... he loves you around.

So... he get a bit upset when you're gone for too long.

At this point he's "adopted" you as his student.

Soon enough it's just you and him all the time... he's even smiling.

You may even go along with his manipulation and isolation... unaware of the red flags...

After all... isn't he just your average guy?

[midnightsunnyday]

With Good Intentions (Chapter Three) ☾ ⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ

(Chapter One) (Chapter Two) Masterlist A03

➥pairings: MC & Everyone, MC/Everyone ➥content warnings: Not Beta Read, We Cook Our Stories Like Solomon, Hurt/Comfort, Angst, Fluff, Some Humor, Explicit Language, Not Canon Compliant, Though Sometimes It Is, Fighting, Family Drama, Family Bonding, Emotional Manipulation, Reader-Insert, Gender-Neutral Pronouns, Lesson 016 Spoilers, Post Lesson 016, Other Additional Tags To Be Added. ➥summary: after the events of chapter 16, MC learns three important lessons: one, that Diavolo is an asshole. Two, as it turns out, being immortal doesn't make you smarter, wiser, or mature, it just gives you a thousand more chances to be a fuck up and not learn and damn thing from it. And three, that there are no therapists in hell. Though they could really all use one. Or in which MC suffers an existential breakdown and Diavolo and the brothers learn that maybe throwing a party wasn't the best response to someone dying. ➥A/N: hello everyone, it's good to see you again. I hope everyone is doing well and whether you're a return reader or just getting started, thank you for your interest in my story. Work has been kicking my ass, but still we persevere! Anyway, until next time, take care and enjoy this very long chapter.

He could tell his brothers grew tired of it. That whenever the topic of their sister was brought up, Belphegor always felt an underlining exasperation, as if they’d all been over the subject for some time and were only waiting for him to do the same, as if she were nothing more than a ghost who’d overstayed her welcome in the rebuilding of their lives.

Or maybe they were just tired of him. Tired of his whining about her. Tired of his disgust for Diavolo’s ideals. Tired of his hatred of all things human. He barely smiled, barely ate, and slept for most of the day. He wasn’t the “sweet, innocent Belphie” they knew and loved. The one who found wonder in everything around him and whose laugh, though rare now, lit entire rooms. No, something within Belphegor was broken and they’d have to accept that it would never be whole again. Not without Lilith.

But who said death was pleasant? That it was something one should simply get over? Loss never leaves one gentle. It doesn’t decide to remove itself after a month, a year, or centuries after. It stays with you, becoming part of you. Some days it gives you the illusion of respite and on those days you go through life barely noticing the quiet, emptiness of it all.

Yet on other days, it breaks you, leaves you shaking and crying, wishing for your thoughts to cease so you can finally be “normal” again. Grief, also like loss, never comes when the moment is decent, does not give you warning. Grief strikes when it chooses to, replaying the moment of your loss ad nauseam, until the whole of you becomes nothing but a shell of memories, wading away to the tides of time.

Most days Belphegor remembered Lilith. Sometimes it seemed he was the only one who did. He remembered her in lunchrooms when the desserts were particularly sweet. He remembered her in corridors, the kind they’d both raced down as fast as they could. He remembered her in dreams, luring him into the forests they used to play in, with trees as high as the sky and where the wind swept through and made waves of shimmering sunshine. In the distance would be Lilith, the years waning upon her memory, yet she waved as she always did, an insult to every petal, every ray of sun. He would run to her, feel the tears wetting his cheeks, his tongue tripping over her name over and over again: Lilith. Lilith. I’m here. Please.

He remembered blood. Too much of it. The kind that no matter how much you scrubbed yourself raw, the stench would remain clung to you like death. The fall was not a pleasant one; they did not streak across the skies like beautiful jewels, they were burning, dying. The landing nearly killed them, sent the earth running each and which way in disgust of them.

How through it all even the Father, no matter how hard they prayed, was always silent. Maybe he too, saw what was to become of them, and closed his heart and ears to it. It was easier, at least for Belphegor, to believe that he’d simply abandoned them, rather than knowingly allow the pain that would scar them for centuries to come.

≪•◦ ❈ ◦•≫ ≪•◦ ❈ ◦•≫ ≪•◦ ❈ ◦•≫

The Celestial Realm had no seasons, but on days when the light was mild and winds smooth for flight, Belphegor and Lilith would sneak amongst the forests, finding shelter under the tall, dense trees. For Raphael, who’d come to search for them in time, the siblings were abandoning their duties, but for Belphegor and Lilith, it was simply a break, albeit a long one.

“Oh, Belphie, he’s simply divine."

Divine. An odd choice of words for a mortal, yet Lilith thought otherwise, not that Belphegor knew enough to object. After all, he’d just learned of the man’s existence a few moons ago, and what he knew was only through her words of him. He wasn’t rich by any means. His family tended animals and sold what they could in the town market. There was a time when the family lived well, but some of the animals were stricken with disease or killed by wolves, and they suffered greatly for it. Even so, this man had “a spirit worth more than all the wealth in the world,” she exclaimed. That despite his awful predicament, he made a way for his family, taking on various forms of labor to keep them fed.

"He's very skilled with his hands." Lilith winked, to which Belphegor pretended to gag. Relations between humans and angels were not unheard of, but ones with the image of his sister he'd rather scrub from memory.

In any case, this man could "literally do anything" and Belphegor sat in awe of this. If all this were true, then Lilith found someone beyond any human he could think of.

Belphegor watched as she twirled about, nearly skipping in her joy, her long hair unfretted and chasing the wind. She was led by a tune only she could hear, her dress gathering at the thick of her sun-kissed legs.

“He’s so polite, a true gentleman,” said Lilith. “He picks me flowers, opens doors, and by Father is he handsome.” She sighed lovingly and clasped her hands against her flushing cheeks. “He could give Lucifer a run for his money, you know?

Belphegor snorted. "A man as beautiful as Lucifer is surely a sight to behold."

"It's true, you know," she said, ignoring his skepticism. "That and he’s strong. Can tend a whole field before sundown without breaking a sweat. Why, I saw him raise two goats on each shoulder and…”

Belphegor rolled his eyes. Though he had no reason to doubt her, his sister found ways to bolster the human past the point of believability, at times. Extravagant. Amazing. Beguiling. Was it even possible that so many adjectives could describe one person? Yet Lilith went on, singing the praises of this fabled man she’d found such importance in.

“He’s just so…so…you understand, don’t you Belphie? How interesting and unique they can be?”

He did. Belphegor loved humans. He found them special, more than most creatures. It was their mundane everyday ways. It was the way they sought purpose from them. It was how they loved and celebrated and burned away life until none was left. Compared to angels, who were created and bound to fates unchanging, mortals were born with the blessing of choice, and it fascinated Belphegor what they did with it. So he watched and soon enough, went to gather in their joy. However, it wasn’t long until his curiosity prompted Lilith’s own, and the young angel began to visit the human realm of her own volition.

While Belphegor didn't fully understand his sister’s ways, he couldn’t help but be drawn into her joy. She’d been struck by Cupid’s arrow, trapped in an endless spring. It’d been beautiful to witness, and while such things didn’t strike him as important before, Belphegor couldn’t help but think of his love, whenever or wherever that might be.

“Belphie, are you even listening to me?”

“Hmm?” He said, led from his thoughts. “What was that?”

“I said Lucifer plans to meet him.”

Belphegor shrugged. “Well, so much for that.”

“I’m serious, Belphie!” She stamped her foot, pouting. “You know how big brother is.”

“Maybe he’ll like him,” Belphegor assured, swallowing his lie. Lucifer wasn’t the best at being impartial, especially when it came to Lilith. She was the youngest, barely new to the world, and he’d sooner have her wrapped up and tucked away than allow any harm to come to her. This man she’d found, without his or any of her sibling's knowledge, was an anomaly, a blind spot in Lucifer’s ever-watchful eye.

“Honestly, he’s always so worried. I told him there was no need, but he insisted.” Lilith’s face fell, eyes widening to some unfounded fate. “What if he doesn’t like him? What if he forbids me from seeing him? Tries to lock me away, key and all? Then what am I to do? I’d have to change my name, hide amongst the humans. We’d be outlaws. Fugitives!"

“Lilly!” Belphegor laughed. She always had a flare for the dramatics. “It’s ok. Lucifer is strict, but I’m sure he’ll come to see him as you do.”

“Do you really think so?”

“I’m sure of it…probably.”

“Oh, you!” she swatted at the air between them. “But you know, maybe you’re right. After all, Lucifer would never do anything to upset me, considering I’m his favorite and all,” she said in a snobbish tone. Lucifer spoiled her. They all spoiled her, really, and it seemed to be rubbing off.

But there was one question Belphegor failed to ask. The most important of them all. “Does he have a name?”

Lilith smiled. “Of course he does, silly. H̵̸̷̶̸̨̡̘̯͇̾̀͋̓̍i̶̴̷̶̷̥̠̬̖͖̋͐̄̎͆s̵̶̷̵̵̢͈̟͕̝̊̌̅̾͒ ̷̵̶̸̵̱͕̦͕͕͑̓̀̍͠n̴̸̸̴̶͈͍͍̯̳̎͛͂̄̏à̵̷̷̷̴͚̟͈̲̃̑̍̾͜m̷̵̵̶̷͉̗̜̗̻̓̀̽̀͝e̴̶̸̷̵͔̻̜̳̣̽̃̋͑͠ ̴̷̵̶̸̧̰̲͙̺̀̃̐͗͑i̶̷̴̷̴͎̪̳̫̬̔́͐̈́͝ş̵̴̴̶̵̠͕̰͕͗̅̅͋̕…̴̷̸̶̵̯͚̲̯̺͐͌̑̔͠

≪•◦ ❈ ◦•≫ ≪•◦ ❈ ◦•≫ ≪•◦ ❈ ◦•≫

“Lucifer! Please, tell them. Tell them they can’t do this!”

Belphegor turned to his brother, who looked as if the world was ending and there was no way to prevent it.

The Father spoke through Michael: Lilith had committed the unpardonable sin, one in which there was no forgiveness. She would be wiped from the face of existence, never to be a part of the cycle of creation again. All this for stealing a fruit, though it was said a simple apple led to Eve’s downfall; what difference would there be for his sister?

Belphegor dug his nails into his palms, neck burning with heat. The Father had refused them council, choosing to lay His judgment through the only other angel he abused more than Lucifer. Did He truly not care for them? Was fighting His battles and upholding His will all they were good for?

“The Father’s word is final,” Michael’s voice was calm, yet short. “Lucifer knows this as well as I do.”

“So you expect us to stand aside and allow our sister to face a fate so cruel?”

“Belphie, please,” Lilith cried, shaking. “It does not matter my end—“

“—But it does matter. You matter.” Belphegor pointed at her with angered assertion. “Not some mortal who was fated to die sooner than you are to blink.”

“Our brother is right, Lilith.” Leviathan shook his head as if trying to unravel what was happening. “Your actions…they make no sense.”

“No,” Lilith spoke, “what makes no sense is a Father who would sit and watch while death and sickness run rampant throughout his creation while having the power to prevent it.”

“How dare she’s” and “heresies” spiraled into the air, forming a tornado of indignation that grew louder and more violent with the need for retribution. Belphegor sneered at the angels who formed a ring of judgment around his sister. It was hard to believe that at one time any of them could be called his brothers and sisters.

“Enough.” It was Raphael, who, unlike Michael, held little reservations in his approach to an otherwise dire situation. “You stand amongst the divine court. Your blasphemy will not be tolerated.”

“Ah, can it,” yelled out Mammon. Someone gasped from the crowd. “You threaten the life of our sister. You better believe we’re gonna cause more than just a ruckus.”

Belphegor looked to Lilith, his eyes imploring her, though there was no answer she could give that would make any sense to him. “Even if he didn’t die today,” he said, “he would’ve died regardless. What then? Why risk your eternity for something so finite?”

Lilith parted her lips as if to form some half-uttered verb. Then she began again, though her mouth did not quiver. She stilled her face, hardened her lips, and spoke her words simply, “For the life of the one I love, I would do anything.”

Belphegor winced, his sister’s words a slap in the face. He would be angry if only there wasn’t so much to go around. What about their love? As if theirs hadn’t outlived kingdoms for her. What love could a being of such little potential possibly give?

It was Beelzebub’s turn to speak, pain shaking his voice. “But…what about us? How could you be so willing to leave us here to grieve you?”

Lilith was quiet, her face turned to some far, distant place. Belphegor wanted to shake her, to wake her from this eternal dream of love that did nothing but harm her.

“There has to be something we can do,” Asmodeus spoke, looking desperately at Michael. “It can’t end like this.”

“And just what do you plan to do to avoid her judgment?” Raphael’s eyebrow rose with his question. “Are any of you willing to take her place?”

They all looked at each other. Not in fear of Raphael’s words, but because neither of them could see themselves as the Father’s children, the remains of their allegiance shattered and pooled in the pit of their stomachs. In the end, what they gained for their loyalty was death, but they would not go without a fight. Finally, Lucifer stepped forward. It was clear to Belphegor that something inside his brother shattered, too. Not broken, but free.

“If the father’s word is law,” he said, “then maybe such laws should be challenged.”

“Be mindful of your next words, brother.” Michael stood with all the caution of a vigilant lion. “Think of the lives of your siblings. Of what you’re sacrificing.”

Lucifer stood, clearly battling himself. Belphegor only wished to know what his brother and Michael were thinking then. Both were close, so much so that they could be mistaken for twins. Maybe they both wanted to see something in the other that was no longer there. By then, Belphegor and his brothers gathered beside the morning star, unwavering. It was clear where their loyalties lay and always would.

As if in understanding, Michael sighed, and drew his blade as if the entire issue were a mere inconvenience. “Don’t make us do this, Lucifer.” Raphael, however, had already summoned his spears.

“You all still have the chance to repent in front of the Father. This will not go without punishment, however.”

“And Lilith?” Asmodeus said, his voice almost hopeful.

“She will leave this plane in peace.”

The once favored son of morning yanked his blade from his sheath and with it t̸̵̵̵̵͙̼̫̗̥̉́̇̈́̈́h̸̶̸̴̴͚͖̥̗̖̊̾̄̒̕e̶̶̸̸̸̻͈͍̗̱͒̆͊̋̒ ̸̵̶̵̵̜̥̭͎̝̑̓̓̀̾h̷̸̶̴̸͓̠͙̹̤͌̄̈́̂̚ḙ̷̸̷̷̸̢̯͖̄̂͂̾̾͜ȧ̴̶̷̴̷̩̯͓̤͋̄͊̍͜v̶̷̸̶̷̧͙̺͇͔̓̇̽̆̔e̴̴̸̴̶̢̖͍̰̫͊̍̔̉̉ņ̶̶̷̴̵̻̣̹͗͊̉͆̎ͅs̴̵̴̵̴̝̻͚̟̖̆́̇̇͠ ̶̸̵̸̶̨̩̞̗̖͒̊̀́̓c̸̴̶̶̶̬̼͎̱͔̈́̏̑͂̑r̶̷̷̴̵̯͚̫͕̳̓̽͂͐͝ĩ̶̶̸̶̷̺̙̠̰͖̏́͆͘e̸̴̸̵̷̹̰͉̫̠̓͌̆̃͂d̸̴̶̶̵̨̻͉̮͕́̈́̈̽̈́.̷̷̵̸̴͓̱̲̘͖̑̓͒̾̕ ̴̸̸̷̴̙̬͉̱͗̉͂̀͂ͅ

≪•◦ ❈ ◦•≫ ≪•◦ ❈ ◦•≫ ≪•◦ ❈ ◦•≫

Not once had Belphegor known the smell of blood until that day. It ranked of rusted metal, and it took all within him not to vomit in the middle of battle. An angel he once played with amongst the lilacs of the Celestial Garden fell limp, a sword thrust through his chest. Mammon had done so without hesitation and proceeded to chop the head of another, his strokes quick like thunder strikes.

A scream, this time from his right. It was Beel caked in a thick carnage of blood and feathers. He’d torn through their attempt at a flank, their weapons barely grazing him as he ripped wings from flesh, bodies spiraling towards the earth.

“Look out!” Asmodeus yelled, his shield snapping against metal. Belphegor leaped to the side, a beam of light zipping downward where his body would’ve been, leaving a hole of ozone in its wake. Belphegor raised his bow in return, his arm unsteady. Shakily, he aimed, barely managing to wound the angel who’d gunned for his head.

The realm was drowned in chaos. A frenzy of limbs and wings dancing to the tune of annihilation. He’d only seen Lucifer once, his body burning white as he bathed the battlefield with righteous fury, sending angel after angel toward their doom. Belphegor had only heard stories of Leviathan’s skills in battle; it was another thing to see him flay a throne alive.

“Lilith,” he heard Mammon cry.

“I’m ok,” she called back. A twang of metal after. “Just focus on yourself.”

So many voices, Belphegor thought. It was hard to keep his bearings. He was nowhere near a child of war. He’d never honed a weapon or raised it against another. His purpose was that of a virtue, to spread the word that with faith and hard work, one would gain ever closer to what was promised. But his life had been so easily tossed aside, his diligence made nothing. And now that one was threatened and the other gone, what then would become of him? Of his brothers? For a moment, he stilled, unable to focus on the battle at hand. It was as if all the air had left him, his breaths jagged and choking.

“Belphie!” Beelzebub’s voice rumbled. Belphegor squinted his eyes toward the sky. It was hard to make them out at first, little glints of sunshine that they were, yet as they drew closer, Belphegor saw the sharpened hatred of a thousand arrows bearing down towards him. He turned.

“Lilith,” Belphegor wailed. She’d been near him, maybe trying to call out to him, for that he’d never know. By then the first arrow struck her wing, then another, piercing through her flesh as her body flailed unnaturally. Beelzebub leaped towards him, tucking him deep into his grasp as they fell downward.

From above them rang a cry so loud that it shattered the noise. Lucifer broke through the sky like a roaring flame, barreling downward towards his sister. It was then Mammon who fell after him, then Leviathan, then finally, Asmodeus. Belphegor’s ears filled with a humming static, the world becoming focused and pin-like. He willed his head to gaze at Lilith. She hurdled downward, specks of ash trailing the air as her wings caught flame. With arm outstretched, he reached for her, ţ̴̶̸̷̶̨̛̠̖̤̈́̔̋̌ḫ̸̷̶̴̵̬͉̞̗͑͋̈́̅͝e̵̶̵̷̷̼̮̝̿̀͑̓͗͜͜ ̶̶̶̶̴͓̘͓͎̼̾̋͒̏͝w̸̸̴̷̵̨͈̼̯̞̉̆͆̒̌ơ̶̵̸̷̶͖̠̬͈̻̈́̓̎̽r̴̸̸̴̵͕̘͚̬̩̾̍̑͒̕l̷̵̷̶̸͕̱̜̯̙̑̈̂̎͠d̵̴̶̶̷̡̰̼͇̊̑́̒̾͜ ̵̸̶̷̸̳͙̭̱̂̍͋̓͘͜f̵̶̶̸̷̙̪̘̟̙̊̽͂̾̕ǎ̵̴̸̴̶̪̰̣̳̫̌̓͛̚d̸̶̸̴̴̻̪̘͇̻̒̅͆̀͛ḯ̷̶̴̴̵͙͇̞̲̜̽̈́͆̔n̶̶̴̵̶͇̲̭̰̻̍̾̑͂͘ǧ̷̶̷̶̶̡̺̪̻̦̃̃͌͝ ̶̵̶̶̴͇̗̠͉̣̍̀̆̂̐

≪•◦ ❈ ◦•≫ ≪•◦ ❈ ◦•≫ ≪•◦ ❈ ◦•≫

“What?”

"̸͓͛W̴̻̒ẖ̵͝a̴̖̓t̴͔͝?̸̢̓"̵̢̒ 

“Come again?”

“I said have you calmed down yet?”

Calmed down. As if he were a child who’d thrown a tantrum and was placed in time-out.

“What do you mean?” Belphegor gazed at Lucifer through hair-draped eyes, annoyed at being interrupted by what would’ve been a critical moment of his performance. He’d begun talking to himself. Wasn’t sure when it started, yet if only to break the monotony of his current tenure. In his mind, Belphegor was the sole performer on a brightly lit stage. In front of him, his audience, cheering for his one-night, one-man show.

Ladies and Gentlemen, he’d say, on behalf of the entire circus troupe, I welcome you to one of the most astounding shows you will ever see! I promise you, it will be something truly special, like a wonderful, fleeting vision—“

“--Belphie?” Lucifer called to him.

Oh, right. This asshole. “What?”

“What is it with you in needing things repeated?” Lucifer said. “I told you to use your time in here to calm down and rethink what you said earlier.”

Belphegor spat, rolling his eyes to some corner of the room. If one were to ask his brother, locking Belphegor away was done for his protection. That it was love, not pride or sick devotion, which forced his hand that day. If not by Lucifer, then Diavolo, and if the rumors regarding the castle’s torture dungeon were true, therein lied the many ways of subjecting the seventh born to a fate worse than boredom. If anything, he should be grateful that the only current threat to his health was the admitted lack of ventilation and an idle mind.

Yet if one were to ask Belphegor, he would’ve gladly accepted torture just to spite him, the unyielding screams of the forsaken a welcomed company compared to the horrid solitude of being trapped in a fucking attic.

“In that case, I’m going to be stuck in here forever,” Belphegor said. “Because there’s no way I’m ever going to take back what I said. No way am I ever going to change my mind.”

He was adamant then, on his hatred of humans. The day he learned of Lilith’s death, from Diavolo of all people, was the day any ounce of empathy he had died with him. Once again, the prince would prove to be a never-ending red stain on his sister’s life. Even after death, he found ways to dishonor her memory, if not through the subjugation of his brothers, then through the announcement of his shitty exchange program, one that Belphegor vehemently denounced. Yet Lucifer, being the boot licker he was, had other plans. It was hard to tell how many days passed since then, let alone how long Lucifer planned to keep him here.

Lucifer sighed and gazed over at the canopied bed. Belphegor had found a few Christmas ornaments packed amongst the attic’s boxes--a nutcracker, a gingerbread man, and a tiny reindeer--to act as his makeshift audience. In noticing Lucifer’s quizzical look, Belphegor hissed, literally hissed, at him in embarrassment.

“Oh, calm yourself,” Lucifer said, stifling his amusement with a cough, remembering that the moment was supposed to be serious. Hell forbid it was anything less. “Regardless, we’ve gone ahead and chosen the second student from the human world.”

“Really…Well, that’s awful news,” Belphegor said, stomping over to his bed and smothering his audience with gathered sheets, his skin heated.

“This time it’s not a powerful, elite sorcerer like Solomon, but a regular, average human.” “And why are you telling me this? I’m not interested in hearing about any hu…”

Belphegor’s smile was wide. “Actually, wait. Maybe that’s not true. Bring that human to me right away, Lucifer. I’ll tear them to shreds so tiny that there won’t be anything left of the body or soul when I’m done.”

Maybe being tucked away inside that large castle of his made the prince a bit dull-minded. Solomon was deemed one of the most powerful magic users in the world, one who—without even raising a hand—could turn even the strongest demon to ash.

But a regular human with no power and no way to defend themselves? It was as if the universe simply hated this human, one that would surely shit themselves after being summoned out of thin air to a realm, as far as they knew, should not exist and amongst beings that only lived amongst the pages of their various religions and stories. It was a tragedy waiting to happen and one Belphegor, with quivering hands, planned to bring forward.

“If this precious student from the human world were to meet an end like that,” Belphegor went on, “it would bring this little exchange program to a screeching halt, wouldn’t it? And what’s more, there’s no telling what it might do to Diavolo’s reputation.”

Lucifer observed him with a sort of veiled heatedness. It was clear his tantrum held little weight, but would end it if needed.

“Oh, I know. If you refuse to bring that human to me, then I’ll call them here myself,” Belphegor clasped his hands together, pleased with his plan. “I may not be able to get out of here, but I can certainly lure a single human half-wit to me without much trouble.”

“Impossible,” Lucifer spoke in a matter-of-fact tone.

“And why’s that?” Belphegor raised his brow, his unease growing.

“The door to this room can only be seen by demons. It’s invisible to humans. Also, I put a curse on the stairs leading up here so that no demon other than me can climb them. No one will ever find you, and no one will ever know you’re here, be they human, or demon, or any other creature.”

Of course. Leave it to Mr. Kill Joy to take the fun out of homicide.

Belphegor’s face slumped, sucking his teeth. “You’ve taken quite the precautions, haven’t you? I’m touched that you’d go to such lengths for me, your good for nothing brother.” Lucifer was taller, about a few inches so, but Belphegor met his gaze all the same. “What exactly are you so afraid of Lucifer?”

“I’m afraid of losing my brother,” Lucifer said, quickly and without a hint of dishonesty.

“No, I don’t think that’s it,” Belphegor said. He wouldn’t allow it. To feel sympathy for the devil. Not after losing what mattered most, and what may’ve been his only chance to correct it. He needed to be the one hurting in this situation and needed Lucifer to be as one-dimensional as possible. “What scares you is the thought of disappointing Diavolo, isn’t it?”

Lucifer was…silent. For what, Belphegor wasn’t sure. Was the answer truly that complicated? Maybe there wasn’t anything more to his brother. Maybe he had become nothing more than a loyal lap dog.

Belphegor pounded his foot against the attic’s ancient floorboards, them rattling as if to collapse. “Say something Lucifer,” he yelled. “The old Lucifer wasn’t like this. He wasn’t afraid of what someone else thought of him. He wasn’t pathetic like that.”

“You’re free to think whatever you want, Belphegor. Also…” Lucifer turned towards the attic door, his voice low and solemn, “I’d say you changed as well.”

“Lucifer!” Yet Lucifer would never turn. Never question any part of himself that held weakness.

As the bars to the attic room clanked shut, Belphegor heard his brother’s footsteps trek down the towering staircase and into the house. Once again, he was left alone, spiraling into the silence of the attic.

He wouldn’t mind being tortured at all. Not at the glint of the blade as it sliced his flesh. Not at the blood that pooled from his wounds. Not even as his limbs were torn from his body or flayed alive. The rush of pain and paranoia would keep him, startlingly, sound. At least then he could see what harmed him. Give it a name, his fury. Tell himself that logically, it was ok to cry, scream, and lash about as he was now, smashing mirrors and ripping pillows to shreds.

But in this attic, this fucking horrible attic, there was no one to blame, and it left Belphegor with only his thoughts, screaming over and over: It’s your fault. It’s always been

your fault

YOUR FAULT

It’s always been

≪•◦ ❈ ◦•≫ ≪•◦ ❈ ◦•≫ ≪•◦ ❈ ◦•≫

Not my fault. It’s not my fault!

It was a lie, of course. Your death was in motion the moment you appeared in front of him, doe-eyed and disturbingly lax for someone in your position. For all Lucifer’s scheming, he’d forgotten one fine detail: that idleness didn’t weaken sloth, but enabled it.

But it is, Belphie. It's what you did.

He didn't think you were dumb enough to believe his story. A human "just like you" who'd been captured and trapped by Lucifer, yet you proved otherwise. Even when his true identity was revealed, you continued to help him as if the threat hadn't shown itself. Things were moving about too easily; the universe truly did hate you.

No that's not...I did it for you. For us.

Admittedly, he'd wrestled in the corners of his mind about it. Argued until there was nothing left to argue. A part of him had grown to like you, strange, dull-headed thing that you were, but if he weren't to kill you, what then? Would he live his life, seeing you coddle up to his brothers? Eat from their plates and take part in their celebrations? Would you somehow charm Diavolo and have the rest of your ilk invade here? Hell forbid the fools began to fall in love with you, then he’d have to bear witness to some half-assed love story, and that he couldn't live with. So he stilled it down. Beat back the part of him that doubted his conviction. This was for Lilith, always for Lilith, and nothing more.

Oh Belphie, you knew I never wanted this. This was always about you. This was your revenge.

How he killed you was deliberate, too. Strangulation was one of the more intimate forms of death one could give. To do so was to be conscious of your victim’s suffering and to take pleasure in it, having the power of life and death weighted within one’s grip. Humans were fragile. Anything more than disembowelment would be too quick and he needed you to feel it. To know how little your life meant as he wrung every inch of it from you.

Please, I'm sorry. I didn’t know. Didn’t know what they were to you.

He admits enjoying it, laughing as the confusion mangled your face. It didn’t take much to knock you on your back, even less to pin you down. You were so weak. How you managed to survive this long was merely incompetence on his brother’s part. They were fools, too cowardly to do what needed to be done. But not him. He’d end your life and soon any hope of continuing this miserable sham of a program.

It’s not about what they were to me, Belphie. You took a life. And you can never take that back.

You withered and flailed beneath him, trying to lift yourself to no avail. A numbing high swept over Belphegor as he took it all in. The beating of your heart, the sound of wheezing lungs, the sweat that drenched your brow, the bright red of your blood. All the colors and sounds bled into a final point until he was overcome with it, twisting, clenching, enamored in the hues of your dying face. Your eyes bulged and the quakes of your death throes rumbled the floorboards. You clung to him, nails scraping the skin of his wrists. When that didn’t work, you clawed for his eyes. The desperation. The fury. He could laugh, so he does, slamming your head into the floor when you attempt to swipe at his face. Your head bounces forward, then goes limp, throat giving way to a sick crunch. He squeezes tighter, breaking through bone, through artery.

Finally, you stilled and so does he.

He assumed your death would be less monotonous, the fires of euphoria dwindling into barely an ember. A cold realization sweeps over him, sending his body to chill and his empathy to reanimate. No, he won't allow weakness. Not a moment for remorse or sorrow. He shakes them from his mind, putting it up to shock and nothing more.

He gazed at his hands, flexing them, feeling like an outsider in his own body. He sits in silence. The attic does not answer with its usual hum of wood. The house does not creak. Instead, it engulfs him in a sea of quiet, and for a moment he wades in it. Hearing his heart, his breathing, the tiny hiss of air that escapes you. For some reason, he cannot will himself to look at you longer. Your face is uncannily calm, though your neck is twisted into unrecognition, the flesh bruised and mangled.

Now, there was nothing left, but still so much to be done. He wrings you by the collar of your shirt, and it seems an eternity before he reaches the attic door. The attic steps feel smaller and out of focus, the house halls a labyrinth. He’d almost forgotten where the main entrance lay until he heard his brothers, their voices joined in a chorus of "where are they?" and "They should be" and "could be." It's the only time he smiles. Not for his brothers, though it was Beel he missed most, but because he finally, finally would have his audience.

Slowly, as he reaches the landing of the stairway, a thought inches forward. Yet this one he couldn’t shake away. Over and over it repeats itself, almost pleading:

Oh, Belphie.

Belphie.

J̸̸̷̷̴͔̪̗̱̊͑͋̈̚͜ J̸̗͑u̸̼̎s̴̬̔t̴̗͌ ̵̅͜w̵̪͘h̸̥̀a̶̮̓t̵͕̅ ̷̱͊h̸̼͝a̴̛̪v̶͕͆e̷̫̍ ̵̩̈́y̶̲͝o̶̫̕u̷̞̍ ̷͉͌d̵̦̐ọ̸́n̸̪̽e̷̫̓?̸̡́

≪•◦ ❈ ◦•≫ ≪•◦ ❈ ◦•≫ ≪•◦ ❈ ◦•≫

Belphegor lurched forward, sweat chilling him to the bone. His dreams were becoming too vivid for his liking. In the corner of his eye sat a large figure, blanketed in the cover of darkness. He blinked. Was he still dreaming?

“What...I...Beel?” He spoke, gasping for breath. How long had he been sitting there?

“It's ok,” Beelzebub said. He sat on the edge of Belphegor’s bed, stroking his shoulder as if to still the chills away. “You had a bad dream.”

“It wasn’t a dream,” Belphegor choked, words rushing from his mouth,” I did it I did all of it I killed Lilith and then I killed them and I…I…“

“Just breathe, Belphie.” But there was nothing Beelzebub could say or do, only wait until the torturous spell was over.

Belphegor placed his hand to his chest, heart beating as if it were going to burst from him and go running off into the world.

In and out. In and out. It didn't help his breathing much, but it made him focus on something other than the panic. Everything felt so heavy like the sky had fallen upon his shoulders.

"It's all...my fault," Belphegor heaved, “my fault.”

In a way, he should be grateful. Lilith lived a long, happy life and that’s all he could ask for. Still, it all felt like a dream and in that moment, he’d forgotten where he was. That the Devildom, despite its idiosyncrasies, was a punishment. That they were damned and whatever fate held for them was often cruel and rarely giving. He knew they were uncomfortable at the party, could feel their quickened breaths rising in an off-tune chorus of sheltered panic. He should’ve helped them, walked them through their spell. Instead, he froze, feeling the judgment heavy in the room, the waves of anger and disappointment hitting him in a heated haze. He watched you run away and with it, his redemption.

“That’s not true, Belphie. Don't blame yourself. If anything...” Beelzebub paused, and Belphegor listened between breaths for the words that never came.

He was about to blame himself again, he thought, yet he could not will himself to assure him otherwise, his breaths still too quick and sharp. Instead, Belphegor buried himself into his twin. If he could not use words, he’d use his actions. Surely Beel, who wrapped his brother in a tight hug, would understand him. Beelzebub, after all, was but a wall to Belphegor’s emotions. Allowing his tears and agony to fall upon him, but never breaking himself. Instead, Beelzebub sat in silence, and together, they rocked each other through the darkness, waiting on the morning hours to break the curse that was Belphegor’s anguish.

Surely, you’d forgive him, he thought. That night at the party meant nothing. That disgusted look you gave him meant nothing.  

[dreamwritesimagines]

Garden of Secrets [10] - Honeysuckle

A.N: Thank you so much for your wonderful feedback and support my loves, it made my whole week, you’re amazing!❤ I hope you’ll like this chapter as well, and please don’t forget to tell me what you think, thank you! ❤

Thanks so much to @theskytraveler​ for helping me with the chapter!

Summary: Engagement dinners are supposed to be romantic.

Warnings: Regency era society and social rules, some gender specific language and terms.

Word Count: 4500

Series Masterlist

It wasn’t that you didn’t know this engagement would be talked about.

You knew very well that starting that night, your sudden engagement would be a very popular topic within the ton for the days to come. Assuming otherwise would make you naïve and you were anything but naïve, at least that was what you liked to think.

But this?

This was something different.

Dear Readers,

Though it has not been long since we have started this season, it seems that love has already claimed a very unlikely couple. Benedict Bridgerton, after his many dalliances and two years of alleged courtship with Miss Harlowe, has decided to wed Miss Y/N.

Now, this author is among the many people that was quite shocked by this sudden engagement and the rumors circling this pleasant union. While there are certain witnesses that claim Mr. and future Mrs. Bridgerton were caught in a scandalous manner, some have also heard the scandalous manner was merely the enthusiasm two lovers had been caught up in after Mr. Bridgerton’s unexpected proposal. Whether that is true or not remains to be found out and rest assured my dear readers, we shall find it out.

Yet, one cannot expect everyone to share the happiness to this delightful news. Especially considering how secret Mr. Bridgerton had held his intentions with Miss Y/N, it raises the question if Miss Y/N has in fact led Mr. Bridgerton away from Miss Harlowe with her charms like many think she has. We can only hope that Miss Harlowe is not too heartbroken, and will finish the season as a happily married woman after a much shorter courting period than she did with Mr. Bridgerton.

Regardless of the many scandals entwined in this love story, it is very clear that this engagement is not the last time we will hear of Mr. and future Mrs. Bridgerton. On behalf of the ton, this author offers her congratulations to our happy couple and would like to say that she cannot wait for the wedding.

Lady Whistledown’s Society Papers.

“Unbelievable,” you muttered, skimming the lines and your head shot up when someone knocked on the door.

“Come in!”

The door opened and Lottie peeked her head in. “Hello!”

“Lottie?” you asked, lowering the paper in a haste and she stepped inside.

“I couldn’t wait any longer to congratulate you!” she said and rushed to pull you into a hug. “It’s such wonderful news, you’re marrying Benedict!”

“Um,” you cleared your throat as she pulled back to grin at you. “Yes. I am.”

“When did you fall in love?” she asked you. “Benedict says it was very sudden!”

You blinked a couple of times, gawking at her.

“…Benedict told you—?”

“That you two fell in love very fast and suddenly.”

Ah.

So you two would be hiding what had happened from everyone then.

On one hand you understood why Benedict had chosen to hide the truth from Charlotte. You yourself had no idea about how to explain it to her, and by doing so you felt like you were protecting her from the truth in a way. You didn’t think you could bear to see the look of heartbreak on her face, especially when you knew she believed in love with all her heart so as far as she and the rest of the ton were concerned, you and Benedict were to have a love marriage.

On the other hand, you were beginning to wish you could at least talk to someone about it, but that was wishing for impossible.

“And I don’t want you to worry,” she said as she plopped down on the bed and grabbed the Whistledown paper. “I’m not heartbroken about it at all, why would I be? Me and Benny were never in a courtship, I hope you know that.”

“Yeah,” you said, trying to offer her a small smile. “I know.”

“Are you very excited about your wedding?”

A bitter taste reached the back of your throat but you sat up, trying to appear nonchalant.

“It’s weeks away.”

“More time to plan it to perfection!” Lottie said with a big smile. “But I’ve heard about the dinner tonight, I am invited as well!”

You let out a relieved breath. “Oh that’s wonderful,” you said “I’m so glad you’ll be there Lottie, you have no idea.”

“Benny will be there too,” she reminded you and you paused for a moment, then nodded.

“Yeah,” you said. “He will be there of course.”

“And knowing him, he probably didn’t give you a lot of information about their family, so that’s also why I came here,” she said. “So that you’ll know who is who tonight and who likes what in detail.”

You snapped your fingers. “It’s a great idea Lottie, I appreciate it.”

Lottie waved a hand in the air. “Oh don’t mention it,” she said. “I know that this dinner is important for everyone, why shouldn’t I do my part to make it easier for at least one person?”

You felt a smile warm your face and reached out to squeeze her hand.

“Thank you.”

“You’re welcome!” she said and took a deep breath. “Alright so, first of all, there’s Anthony Bridgerton, the head of the family.”

“Yeah I—”

“He’s the sweetest person in the entire world,” she said, making you frown.

“What?”

“Yes! He is so thoughtful, and so kind, and so—”

“Are we talking about the same person?” you asked. “The oldest brother?”

“Yes that’s him!”

“Lottie, I already met him the other day.”

Lottie gave you a happy smile. “And? What is your opinion of him?”

“He should drop dead.”

Lottie’s eyes widened.

“No!” she said quickly as if your words could in fact make Anthony Bridgerton drop dead and she shook her head, that crestfallen look on her face making you feel as if you kicked a puppy. You took a deep breath.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean—”

“You did not like him?”

“Not exactly,” you admitted. “And the feeling is mutual.”

Lottie tilted her head. “Oh I cannot imagine him not liking you,” she said. “Why would he not?”

“I’m quite certain he has a list,” you pointed out and Charlotte thought for a moment.

“I’m sure when he sees how in love you are with each other at tonight’s dinner, he will reconsider his stance.”

You raised your brows, that familiar nervousness spreading through you at the thought of tonight.

“How in love we are,” you repeated. “Right. This dinner should be interesting.”

                                                     *

You could swear the time had gone faster than usual until the dinner time. Lottie had left around the afternoon to go to her own house to prepare, and your aunt was so excited that she could hardly sit still until everything looked perfect, from the gifts you would take to Bridgerton house to your gown for the night. Your uncle was not as excited as she was, and yet he had fondness etched all over his face whenever he looked at her and saw her so happy.

If you could bring yourself to hope, you would have hoped for having a marriage similar to theirs, one he still could not help but smile whenever he saw her almost glowing in excitement, but you knew better than that.

Their marriage was an exception, something impossible for you to achieve.

No matter how sweet Benedict had been with you, as soon as you were wedded—

No.

You couldn’t think about that, not now.

“Clover, a word?”

You whirled around on your heels at the foyer while your aunt and Teddy stepped outside to make their ways to the carriage.

“Of course, uncle,” you said as he approached you, fixing his jacket.

“Do I look like a good in-law?”

A small giggle escaped from you and you narrowed your eyes, tilting your head in an attempt to look serious.

“Very much so,” you said. “Bridgertons will be lucky to have you.”

“Not luckier than they will be to have you,” he said and you bit down on your lip, averting your gaze.

“I doubt it.”

“Why?”

“I’m not—” you paused for a moment, then shrugged your shoulders. “I’m just not sure I will fit in with them.”

“Love has blessed you, my dear,” he said. “Perhaps you should give them or yourself a chance.”

You heaved a sigh and tried to smile.

“Let’s just get through this dinner,” you said. “And I will see about that.”

“More than I hoped for,” he said, gesturing surrender before offering you his arm. “Let’s get through this dinner then.”

You took his arm and walked out of the house with him, trying your hardest to repress the fear tensing all your muscles. However, you seemed to be the only one who had that issue because Teddy kept humming himself a tune the whole way to the Bridgerton house while your aunt filled your uncle in about her many ideas for the wedding.

That nervousness was getting harder the more people talked about that impending doom.

When the carriage came to a stop and the coachman opened the door, you took a shaky breath, digging your fingernails into your palms. Your uncle helped you and your aunt out, Teddy jumping out of the carriage full of excitement. The four of you made your way up the stairs as the doors opened before you all stepped in, Lady Bridgerton, Anthony and Benedict waiting for you in the foyer.

“Lord and Lady Thorne,” Lady Bridgerton greeted your uncle and aunt, only for them to greet her back, Anthony and Benedict doing the same.

“And Y/N, my dearest!” Lady Bridgerton said, kissing you on the cheek. “Welcome! Teddy, Gregory and Hyacinth are so happy that you’re here.”

“Thank you Lady Bridgerton,” you said and Benedict shot you a warm smile before he bowed.

“Miss Y/N.”

“Mr. Bridgerton,” you greeted him back and Lady Bridgerton and your aunt exchanged smiles before you all made your way into the house. You narrowed your eyes at Anthony who glared at you back and Benedict looked between you two, frowning slightly.

“I heard you two met earlier?”

“We did,” you said drily and Anthony opened his mouth to say something but before he could, he was interrupted.

“Hello everyone,” the familiar cheerful voice reached you, making you turn your head to see Charlotte entering the house with a big smile on her face. “Thank you again for the invitation. My mama had to stay with the little ones but I hope my papa and I are enough to share the happiness!”

Charlotte’s father bowed, and quickly made his way to Lady Bridgerton and your uncle and aunt, and Anthony smiled softly at Lottie.

“Charlotte,” he said. “Welcome.”

Teddy held his breath, making you and Benedict turn to him.

“I forgot my gift!”

You frowned. “Teddy, uncle already—”

“No, my gift!” he said, already running out of the door and you rushed after him outside, with Benedict following you.

“Teddy!” you called out and he ignored you, approaching the carriage to pull himself up into it. You felt Benedict come up to you to stand by your side while you frowned but before you could go to Teddy he had already jumped out of the carriage, holding a couple of flowers from their stems with a proud grin on his face.

“I wanted to bring flowers for the ladies because ladies like flowers!” he said, holding them up for you to see them better, making Benedict chuckle. “And they’re all different, and this one will be for Miss Harlowe because it’s the prettiest one.”

You blinked a couple of times, taking a look at the different sized stems that looked awfully like they were ripped instead of cut. “Teddy, are those…from my garden?”

He nodded, happiness shining in his eyes and you couldn’t find it in your heart to scold him for it, so you cleared your throat.

“Oh?”

“They’re very beautiful Teddy,” Benedict said. “I’m sure Charlotte will love it, why don’t you go inside and give it to her?”

Teddy looked up at him, a small frown appearing on his face as his gaze darted between you and Benedict.

Oh.

Of course. He still feared Benedict would somehow make you leave just like Josie now that you were to be married.

“We’ll be right there,” you assured him. “Go ahead and give the ladies their flowers, they will be so happy.”

A bright smile lit up his face and he nodded, then ran back into the house, making you shake your head.

“Unbelievable.”

“He’s going to be a heartbreaker when he grows up,” Benedict said with a laugh and you heaved a sigh.

“That flower for Charlotte?” you said. “That’s gardenia.”

“Hard to grow?”

“One of the hardest,” you said, running a hand over your face. “Well at least he can appreciate the beauty of it.”

A silence fell upon you and you cleared your throat, then turned to go back into the house but Benedict touched your arm gently, making you stop.

“Can we—” his blue eyes searched your face. “Can we talk?”

It wasn’t fair that he looked this handsome even under the dim moonlight, and it certainly wasn’t fair that just with one look he managed to make your heart skip a beat. Reminding yourself to focus, you started fidgeting with the bracelet around your wrist.

“What is it?”

“Our engagement dinner,” he said with the ghost of a mischievous smile pulling at his lips and you bit inside your cheek to keep yourself from doing the same, then crossed your arms.

“I’m listening.”

He ran his hand through his black hair, messing it up in the most endearing way before he pointed at the house with his thumb.

“Only my mother and brother know about the details of our uh—sudden betrothal.”

You clicked your tongue. “Figures. Your brother had many opinions about it.”

“He tends to have that issue more often than you’d think,” he pointed out, nodding his head and you arched a brow.

“And?”

“And what?”

“What did he say to you?”

Benedict scrunched up his nose and scratched the back of his neck. “Oh he…congratulates us.”

You narrowed your eyes at him. “Try again.”  

“He wished us a lifetime of happiness.”

“Benedict,” you said, disbelief apparent in your tone and he cleared his throat, waving a hand in the air.

“He may have mentioned something about you being as sweet as a viper, now that I think about it.”

“Ah.”

“And that he would ask mother to pray for me because I would need it.”

“He’s not completely wrong,” you said with a shrug of your shoulders. “You might need a little more than a prayer if you’re insistent on spending a lifetime with me though.”

That playful light started glimmering in his eyes. “Looking forward to it.”

“I should gift your mother a Bible or something in case she wants to perform an exorcism on me.”

“Come on now,” he scoffed as if the mere idea was absurd. “You’re not being fair.”

“I think I am.”

“No you’re not,” he said. “A Bible? Teddy brought all the ladies in the house flowers, it’s quite obvious you will need to step it up when it comes to gifts.”

A laughter you couldn’t stop escaped from you and you pursed your lips together to hide it, ignoring his roguish smirk.

“So before we go in there,” you said, desperate to appear nonchalant. “It would be better if we established certain things about this…” you motioned between you. “Whatever this is.”

“Agreed,” Benedict said. “I actually took it upon me to fill them in on details because they kept asking me questions about everything between us.”

“That’s great,” you said. “I’ll just tell them the same then, because I’m not really good at…you know. Sharing things with people.”

“Shocking information,” he noted and you narrowed your eyes at him.

“Shut it,” you said. “What did you tell them?”

“Well, Daphne asked when things started between us,” he said. “I told her that I found myself thinking of proposing to you within the season after the flower exhibition. Dreaming of our future together and such.”

You snapped your fingers. “That’s such a good lie. How did you come up with it?”

His gaze stopped on you for a moment, a look you couldn’t quite decipher crossing his face but it was gone as soon as it came before he took a deep breath.

“The painting,” he said. “I figured it’d be more convincing.”

You nodded, trying to ignore the way your stomach did a happy flip upon remembering the painting.

“Alright,” you breathed out. “When did we fall in love?”

His head shot up. “What?”

“I mean the whole ton will believe we’re in love, we must have our story straight,” you said. “Any idiot could propose to someone when they’re infatuated. When did we realize it was true love and not some sort of infatuation?”

He didn’t even pause to think about it. “Greenhouse.”

“We weren’t supposed to be unchaperoned at the greenhouse, Benedict.”

Hearing his name from your lips made him smile slightly but he didn’t comment on it.

“Poetry reading then?”

You made a face. “Kitty was talking about how you would propose to her by the end of the season during the said poetry reading right behind me, that’s hardly romantic.”

He hummed. “I wasn’t aware you knew the meaning of the word romantic.”

“It’s a nonsense belief I must play into,” you said, rolling your eyes. “That’s what it means. So?”

“The night of the theatre.”

Your breath got caught in your throat when the memory of the rooftop hit you, making you bite at your lip.

“Now that I think about it, we did push our luck I think,” you muttered and Benedict shrugged his shoulders.

“Third time was the charm,” he said. “But no, I’m not talking about the rooftop. I’m talking about the play.”

“We didn’t talk during the play.”

“Okay it’s never—” he paused. “I think we’re looking at it the wrong way.”

“What do you mean?”

A sad smile appeared on his face. “No one ever falls in love at the same time, someone always falls in love first.”

You both knew what he was referring to, and you averted your eyes from his to take a look at their garden.

You wanted to tell him it wasn’t love, that he couldn’t possibly have fallen in love with you. It was lust at the very best, an infatuation he had convinced himself as love. He was going to realize that sooner or later, and when he did he would resent you, and it was going to turn into hate in no time and—

No.

You weren’t going to think about that now.

“How about this?” his voice snapped you out of your thoughts and you swallowed thickly, turning your gaze to him. “I realized it was true love at the night of the poetry reading, and you realized it was true love during—”

“The dance,” you cut him off. “That would also play into how we…uh—were discovered after your proposal.”

A silence fell upon you for a moment and his gaze locked into yours.

“Y/N, we—” he started but was cut off when someone cleared their throat and you both turned your heads.

“Hello lovebirds,” Eloise joked and pointed back with the geranium she was holding, no doubt Teddy’s gift to her. “You’re expected for dinner. We can’t start without the guests of honor and I’m starving here.”

You nodded and took a deep breath, then offered her a smile.

“Of course. I didn’t notice the time.”

She nodded at Benedict. “Is he trying to convince you not to change your mind? Considering marriage is a prison that no sane person would want?”

“Eloise,” Benedict said with a sigh and she held up her hands.

“Fine, fine…”

Well, Eloise did have a point there, marriage was a prison but at this point, there was nothing you could do but walk into it.

“Shall we?” Benedict asked and offered you his arm, and you placed your hand on his arm, trying to ignore the sparks rushing through you.

“Yeah,” you said. “Let’s go, I’m starving as well.”

                                            *

It seemed that everyone was having fun at the dinner. Charlotte’s father was a sweet man, and he had gotten along well with your uncle in no time, Lady Bridgerton and your aunt no doubt planning the wedding, and Teddy, Gregory and Hyacinth were all on the other side of the table, talking and giggling. Charlotte had been seated next to Anthony, and they had been in a very deep conversation since the beginning of the dinner.  Daphne especially seemed very excited but perhaps because Benedict had warned her about it before, she managed to control herself and keep from asking about the plans for the wedding.

Even though it was a total sham, you had to admit you and Benedict had put up a very convincing performance so far. Perhaps it was because no one had pulled you or Benedict into a conversation yet, but you could feel the stolen glances and you were sure that sooner or later—

“So,” Lord Harlowe said, “The lovers at the table!”

And as it turned out, it would be sooner.

“Must we wait until the dessert or will you tell us the details about the proposal now?”

You tried to swallow down the nervousness and reached out to grab your glass, then took a huge sip as Benedict sat up straighter.

“The proposal?”

“Or anything really!” Charlotte said with a smile, making Anthony steal a look at her before turning to you both. “You refused to share your plans with even me, Benny. We tell each other everything!”

Anthony pressed his lips together before taking a sip of his wine while Daphne motioned at Benedict.

“I cannot believe you kept it a secret from all of us.”

“I’m sure he had his reasons, Daph.”

“I didn’t want you to scare my betrothed off, that’s enough of a reason,” Benedict said and Eloise grinned.

“And what was the reply when you proposed?” she asked. “I’m curious about that. How does one answer a proposal rather than running away?”

“Eloise—” Lady Bridgerton said but she was interrupted.

“I said yes.”

“She said of course,” you and Benedict talked at the same time and you pulled your brows together to shoot him a confused look.

“Of course?” you repeated as Anthony cleared his throat and you snapped your fingers. “I uh…I believe I said yes, of course.”

“I can hardly remember anything because I was incredibly nervous,” Benedict added in a haste and Hyacinth let out a breath.

“Were you scared she would say no, Benedict?”

“I was in fact convinced she would say no.” Benedict said and you nodded.

“I know the feeling.”

“Hm?”

“Nothing,” you said quickly and Benedict bit down a smile.

“Well, I did tell you that you would fall in love,” your aunt said, pointing at you. “You tempted fate too much my dear, you always do.”

“And when did you two fall in love?” Charlotte asked, excitement laced in her tone and Benedict and you exchanged glances.

“After our first dance,” you said curtly, taking another sip of your drink just so that you could keep yourself busy and a silence fell upon the table before Benedict took a deep breath.

“For me it was the night of the poetry reading,” Benedict said, his voice soft. “I’ve had one moment with her, a fleeting one really, but I knew before our conversation was over—before she walked away from me yet again,” he added, making the rest of the table chuckle. “As she does all the time since the first day we met.”

You could feel your heartbeat getting faster as you stared at him, unable to look away from his piercing gaze.

“But I knew,” he said. “Right there and then, that she is the inspiration to my very soul. That she will hold my heart forever.”

A chorus of aww raised from everyone around the table and you felt a fire spread over your face before you covered your face with your hands, your heartbeat almost deafening in your ears. You lowered your hands, unable to stop the smile on your face and Benedict held your hand to squeeze it, the familiar desire shooting through you from his simple touch. Your aunt pressed a hand on her chest while Eloise rolled her eyes, and your uncle shook his head slightly.

“Young love,” he muttered while Charlotte’s father raised his glass.

“Hear hear.”

“Excuse me for a moment please,” you managed to say as you pushed your chair back, then left the dinner table. You passed the hallway to open the window, the cold air hitting your face immediately but it did nothing to soothe the burning on your face, on your whole body.

You knew it was merely a performance for the others, to make them believe in your love so that there would be no questions asked about your betrothal, so that they would all feel happy about it but even you couldn’t help but feel that warmth in your chest, spreading through your system.

You weren’t supposed to feel anything like this. It was all a lie, and the minute you lowered your guard…

You knew better.

The footsteps coming closer made you turn your head and you offered Benedict a small smile.

“I just needed some air,” you said, motioning at the window. “I won’t be long.”

He smiled back and leaned sideways to the wall, crossing his arms. “Are you alright?”

Your eyes flickered over his handsome face and you took a deep breath.

“Yeah,” you said before you sat on the windowsill. “You have no reason to worry, I know it was all pretend.”

Benedict paused for a moment and swallowed thickly, pursing his lips together as if he was trying to hold back the words. Silence fell upon you as you found yourself admiring his beauty almost in a daze before you remembered to snap out of it, then threw your shoulders back.

“We should go back,” you murmured and stood up to step past him, but he touched your arm to make you stop.

“Y/N?”

You looked up at him. “Hm?”

“I didn’t get a chance to tell you earlier,” he said “You look absolutely breathtaking.”

You pulled your brows together, looking at the hallway before turning to him again.

“It’s just us here,” you said. “No one else to hear it, you don’t need to say that.”

“I’m not saying it for anyone else to hear it,” he said with a soft smile. “I’m saying it because it’s the truth.”

Your eyes snapped up to his, that fire over your cheeks getting even worse as you blinked a couple of times, at a loss for words while that pleasant warmth burst through your chest, spreading through your bloodstream. You opened your mouth, then closed it again and walked past him in a haste to go back to the dining room, trying your hardest to stop the smile curling your lips.

Chapter 11

[it-happened-one-fic]

Reliable - Sebek

Author's Notes: This fic is for @rainbowcake1212 for my 300 Followers Event! I hope you enjoy your Hot Chocolate and Cheesecake fic!

Type: Gender-neutral reader/ fluff/ romantic/ Hot Chocolate and Cheesecake prompt

Word count: 2454

I stared, flabbergasted, at Sebek, who merely looked at me with that point-blank stare of his.

“So let me get this right…. You are getting harassed by overly pushy noble ladies seeking a…”

“A relationship.” He finished impatiently, scowling slightly before he continued, “I have rejected them countless times, but they still return. They no doubt wish to use me to get close to my Lord, but I will not allow it.”

A smug grin crossed his face as he finished, no doubt proud that he was protecting Malleus from a perceived threat. It was just sad that he didn’t realize he was perfectly worth being interested in all on his own without his connection to Malleus.

“And you want me to accompany you to this ball as your fake date?” I questioned him, hardly even able to believe that he had even brought this up.

And he simply nodded in confirmation, like there was nothing odd about it. 

I shook my head incredulously, “Wouldn’t it be better to find someone a little more… I don’t know, impressive, to scare off your suitors?”

His eyebrows rose in a surprisingly slow climb for someone quite as hot-blooded as Sebek, “No.” 

His hand twitched at his side, no doubt a sign of agitation at his having to request assistance from a human such as myself, “You will do perfectly well.”

I found myself shrugging, still not entirely certain about Sebek’s grand scheme but also willing to help. After all, it couldn’t be pleasant to be pursued by someone you’d already rejected.

 “Alright, I’ll do it. What do I need to know?” That ended up being the question I wished I’d never asked since that was the question that led to my copious and detailed instruction regarding the Valley of Thorns and its many, many customs.

But, come the day of the ball, I was certainly prepared. Especially since Mrs. Zigvolt herself had gotten me a suitably dressy outfit ready.

She’d been thrilled that Sebek had brought a friend home, and then even more delighted when she found I was going to be his partner for the evening. Even after I’d told her I was just his fake date, she remained delighted. Chuckling slightly to herself as she’d gotten my measurements, “Of course, dear. Of course.”

I’d frowned at her but kept my silence, not quite having the heart to tell her that Sebek was anything but interested in me. I was just handy for the current situation he was in. 

We were friends, but I doubted that line would ever be crossed since I was human and he’d made it painfully clear how he felt about humans in general. But, at the very least, pretending to be his date for the evening might be fun. Even if just a little.

And so I entered the palace on Sebek’s arm, doing my best to not be distracted by how good he looked in his clean-cut suit that made him look like a true knight even though he was still in training. 

If I hadn’t been able to see it before, I could certainly see why he had a great many suitors who were apparently hounding him.

The doors swung open as we arrived, carefully walking down the wide staircase into the ballroom filled with fae, who all turned to openly stare at us.

 Over at the raised dais, I could see Malleus, guarded by Lilia and Silver, alongside a seated woman whom I could assume was the queen.

The three of them seemed pleased to see me alongside Sebek, but I couldn’t say the same for everyone present.

There were several women, in particular, who seemed rather annoyed by my presence. Or perhaps it was more who I was with.

I leaned closer to Sebek, smiling relaxedly even as I whispered to him, “So what is it, exactly, that you’re wanting me to do?”

He glanced at me with one raised eyebrow, totally ruining the image of a happy couple by the lack of smile on his face, “You merely need to stay by my side.”

He spoke like that was obvious, and I sighed. Apparently, selling this relationship was going to be entirely up to me. 

And our first test came all too soon as a younger-looking noble came over, a smile on his face as he greeted Sebek, “Ah. It is good to see you again, Master Zigvolt. I am sure you are relieved to be home from school.” 

I watched awkwardly as the formalities were dispensed, feeling halfway like I was watching some sort of period film from a front row seat, until the man twisted to look at me, a charming smile on his face as he looked down at me, “And this is…?”

“Mine.” The response was blunt and immediate and had me looking up in utter shock at Sebek, who seemed perfectly relaxed. Like he hadn’t just spouted something utterly ridiculous, even if I was his fake date.

I smiled awkwardly as I looked back at the young man, who looked just as startled as I was, confirming that ‘mine’ was an odd way of introducing one’s partner even in the Valley of Thorns.

“Yes, I am Sebek’s partner,” I calmly let my hand continue to rest where it was, tucked through the crook of Sebek’s elbow, even as I squeezed his arm slightly in annoyed revenge. Earning myself an odd look from Sebek as I began cleaning up his mess.

“Please, call me Y/n,” The man nodded, smiling awkwardly as the two of us pretended that Sebek hadn’t just calmly asserted that I belonged to him. The man went on with what I assumed were more common pleasantries before at last bidding us adieu.

“It was a pleasure to have met you.” He bobbed his head awkwardly before quickly retreating as soon as he’d finished his piece. Leaving me to look up at Sebek in still frustrated shock.

“What was that?” I hissed at Sebek, earning myself an incredulous look from the young man, who apparently had seen nothing wrong with the introduction he’d given for me.

“I was letting him know that you were with me,” He was still utterly flummoxed, dragging a sigh out of me.

I’d known that Sebek was utterly hopeless, but this… I honestly hadn’t expected it to be quite this bad.

“Sebek, you can’t just introduce me as yours. No one does that. You need to just let people assume we’re together,” I quietly explained as we continued to meander through the room. Dodging various other guests who continued to watch the two of us with curious gazes.

“And why are people staring so much anyway? Is it that odd for you to come with someone?” Sebek was apparently more prepared for this line of conversation since he responded much more promptly and with less confusion as he shook his head.

“No. They are not used to humans. My father does not come to these… celebrations. The only human usually present is Silver, and he has already proved himself to be a competent knight. Other than that, it is only ever dignitaries.” I nodded as I mulled over his words, not entirely liking what they meant.

“So I’m the odd one here?” His nod confirmed my words, and I sighed, wondering for the thousandth time why he thought I would be a good choice for his fake date.

“Alright, what do we do next? Is there anyone you need to greet?” I looked up at him questioningly as he stopped us off to the side of the room. Glancing around as if to check that no one was too close to overhear us, even though people had been giving us wide-berth the entire time.

I suppose it was easier for them to observe from a distance.

“No, if anyone wishes to speak to me, they will come. At most, we’ll have to do one dance. For now, I’m going to get something to drink. Stay here,” So saying, he strode off. Straight-backed and proud as ever, even though it seemed like absolutely everyone was questioning his choice on his date. Including myself.

But that was the way Sebek often was. It was impossible to tell what was going to bother him and what wasn’t. While certain things being said about him would bother him endlessly, others wouldn’t. 

What surprised me was that the others whispering about the fact he’d come with a human didn’t bother him. It was true that his parents were a human and fae match, but I’d figured that such a thing would bother him.

I frowned, watching as one of the fae broke off from the crowd and approached me. It was a woman.

She was, just like the other fae, absolutely gorgeous. But, more importantly, she had me pointed and was obviously approaching to have a word with me. And if my reasons for being at this ball were anything to go by, it was going to have something to do with Sebek and what I was doing with him.

This was quite likely one of the suitors he’d wished to deter.

She smiled as she stopped in front of me, “You must be Sebek’s partner. I confess I wasn’t aware he had someone he was with until the two of you appeared. It is lovely to meet you.”

Her tone was sweet, and, to anyone watching, she would appear quite genuine. But there was something in the way she held herself, like a snake poised to strike at the very instant I gave her an opening, that spoke of anything but sweetness.

But this was something I’d already been prepared for. While Sebek hadn’t mentioned it, Lilia had.

The suitors Sebek so wished to deter weren’t likely to just accept that he’d found someone that he preferred over them. Much less if that person didn’t have a rank and wasn’t fae.

So I smiled back, preparing to play whatever game was being laid out in front of me, “Oh, we haven’t been together that long, and Sebek wanted to make sure I was ready to attend one of these balls before he brought me with him. He’s incredibly attentive, you see.”

Attentive indeed. I doubted I would ever forget the rigorous testing I’d gone through before he’d at last decided that I was ready for tonight.

“Indeed, he is quite a charming man. It’s good that he prepared you, though. It would be so unfortunate if something went wrong. After all, it wouldn’t just affect you, but him as well. Better to be safe than sorry, as they say.” 

She was an insincere one, that was certain. I could understand why Sebek wouldn’t like her, even as lovely as she was. 

And charming wasn’t the first word I would use to describe Sebek.

It was true that he had some endearing qualities and that he was quite attractive, but still… Charming didn’t quite encompass all of Sebek when one thought of exactly how loud and blunt he could be at times.

But I didn’t miss her oh-so-subtle threat about how if something were to occur, it would affect him. That was something I’d already realized and had been the only reason I’d accepted his lessons with little complaint.

“Well, yes, of course. I could never let something happen to harm him.” They weren’t untrue words. In fact, nothing I’d said was untrue. But, just from watching her, it didn’t look like I had to lie to upset her.

“My, you are a sweet one. I can understand why he likes you so well. However, I can’t help but wonder if you’ll be able to handle the pressure?”

I would have almost preferred if she’d thrown a drink in my face rather than attempting to slip through the cracks and hit me with attacks meant to weaken my resolve and cause uncertainty. But that was also her trouble. She wasn’t going to be able to sway me with such threats.

“Ah, well. I have faced certain pressures before, and I don’t want to disappoint Sebek….” I trailed off, watching as the man in question approached with a frown on his face.

“Y/n?” The woman turned to face him, her eyes wide at the tone he’d used. One that spoke of concern while simultaneously promising to handle the situation if I needed him to.

And that was one of the reasons this woman wouldn’t be able to sway me. Not only had she underestimated me, she’d underestimated exactly how much Sebek and I trusted one another.

I smiled at him, resting my hand on his arm, “Everything’s fine. I was just about to tell the lovely young woman that she needn’t worry about me. How could I ever crumble under any pressure and disappoint you when you are always so reliable?”

It was subtle, but I could see her fist clench behind her as she looked between me and Sebek. The picture of a supportive couple who wouldn’t crumble just because of a few spiteful words.

“I see.” He looked down at me for a brief moment, with a certain softness to his gaze before he looked her way. A proud smirk appeared on his face that had me bracing for the loudness that was coming.

“I THANK YOU FOR YOUR CONCERN FOR MY PARTNER, MISS RAFFLESIA. BUT AS YOU CAN SEE THERE IS NO NEED FOR SUCH WORRIES!” 

I barely managed to not cringe at his loudness but smiled nonetheless as he broadcasted the entire situation to everyone at the ball.

Whether calculated or not, he had certainly embarrassed ‘Miss Rafflesia,’ as evidenced by the way she retreated at impressive speeds.

“Was the yelling really necessary?” I looked up at him, still smiling at his customary volume, which had been oddly absent this evening.

He looked down at me, nodding firmly as he lowered his voice, no doubt because I’d mentioned his yelling, “Indeed. They all need to know that you have my utter trust. That way, they won’t bother trying to harass you when I am not near. It would take more than just a few words to break my trust in you, and I have faith that it is the same for you.”

My eyes widened at his words, ever blunt in his honesty, no matter the topic. I laughed slightly as I recovered from my surprise, earning myself a surprised look from my partner, which only amused me further.

But how could I help it when I’d long since realized that even though this was just a fake arrangement, I could have a far worse partner than someone quite as reliable as my very own knight.

*Rafflesia is a genus of parasitic flowering plants in the family Rafflesiaceae. 

[utilitycaster]

So now that I've made all my choices for Heroes of the Veilguard, let's talk through them, because there's a lot of good, a little that could be done better, and some general thoughts. Obviously, huge spoilers, and also I'm only in act 2 so don't send ME spoilers.

Of relevance, and I'll bring this up too in specific cases where it makes sense: I'm playing a human Mourn Watch Warrior Rook who is dating Bellara, and the narrative has very much been of someone who is proud and respectful of her own heritage, but has really loved traveling and has in particular fallen in love with Arlathan and Bellara's passion for it. Also, I saved Treviso, so that impacts Lucanis and Neve's stories.

Harding: I feel like this one is sort of set up within the narrative, with both the Solas memories and the conversation in which Lucanis and Harding talk and she reveals that because she was a small dwarven girl in a human society, she became very pleasant and agreeable as a defense mechanism, so when we're fighting the embodiment of her anger it felt very natural to embrace that and accept it, but it is also true that Harding's compassion and friendliness means a lot. I took her or Bellara on literally every recruitment quest (though in one case that was accidental tbf) because they're the friendly teammates. I have a personal bias towards letting women be angry but also this might be informed by the fact that I ran the Solas Memory quest pretty early on and not everyone does.

Lucanis: I must admit, this one is one of two that feel the most unambiguous in having a right answer. I don't think imprisoning Illario, if you have the option, feels right. Despite all he did, he is the only family Lucanis has other than Caterina, and the only other Dellamorte of his generation to survive. I think on some level if you've tamed Spite you need to really make peace and take the generous option (which to be clear is still public humiliation).

Taash: So I loved the quest, it's probably one of my favorites in terms of vibes, but I actually found the decision a little lackluster because their mother dies, so the choice of whether to embrace Qunari vs. Rivaini heritage feels like it's not a terribly weighty one as neither has serious consequences. Both have room for them as a nonbinary person, and ultimately I don't think Shathann's feelings on Qunari/Rivaini matter after death because what's important is she accepted Taash's gender. I feel, tbh, like Taash's big decision is the gender identity one, and that shouldn't be a player dictated decision (I know you can encourage it more or less but I don't think you can stop them, nor should you be able to - you can just alienate them), so the decision you're left with is eh. (I don't actually mind the idea of a binary choice between ethnicity/country because like...on some level, assimilation or not assimilating either is one big decision or a thousand little ones constantly, and it's hard to depict the latter, and even then you have a mentality towards it; it's really just both feel equally valid and not that consequential). Especially because the "Big Bad Kills My Relative With A Mighty Slam" gets used in Bellara's story too I wish Shathann had survived but been injured and Taash knew they'd have to help their mother for a time post-Veilguard and that influenced the decision.

Emmrich: Also an incredible quest but I am sorry there's no world in which, after Emmrich is so utterly delighted by Manfred speaking for the first time, and so broken up by his death, in a quest where Manfred's participation is the key to its success, that I pick lichdom. Like I was already eh on it even as a Mourn Watch character but like, I do feel this might be by far the clearest decision. Also I don't know if it's just coincidental and not a direct trigger but Emmrich's date with Strife comes up immediately after. Idk I feel like if your fear is of your own death it isn't much better to have to survive hundreds and thousands of deaths, especially since Emmrich is so excited to be out in the world.

Bellara: 1. why is her quest so sad why are you making my girlfriend cry 2. fuck the beam puzzle for real and 3. This is ABSOLUTELY the hardest choice for me (though I can't speak to Neve's). There's a really strong argument for both of them - destroying the archive prevents another situation like Cyrian's from happening, even if the loss of knowledge is a blow, whereas keeping it runs the same risk. I like keeping it; I think it speaks to the idea that Bellara's arc is learning to trust her own judgment even when there is a possibility things could go badly, and I can see a future for her story (at this time anyway) where she grows into more leadership in the Veil Jumpers and can find good future stewards of this information! But destroying it isn't a bad choice at all. Literally one of the most balanced, and I don't think this changes if you are less connected to Bellara or the Veil Jumpers, at least not in a specific way. I could see Mourn Watch going either way too (is there a system of stewardship in place? Because dangerous information is still information but it needs that, perhaps the Veil Jumpers need to add that element) but like, I think the Wardens grappling with the consequences of hiding darker truths is an interesting dimension as well; Shadow Dragons similarly could go either towards elven liberation or "we don't want the Venatori getting this," and so on. I think most characters either would be torn or wouldn't have a deep investment either way and so it's always a difficult choice.

Davrin: This one was funny because my Rook (has fallen in love with Bellara and Arlathan and Dalish culture) is like GIVE THE GRIFFONS TO ARLATHAN but I as a person lean slightly towards Wardens. I think this one is really dependent on how you played Rook (unlike Bellara's which is always a very difficult one) but in some vast cosmic sense there is no correct answer, only one that seems correct given Rook's perspective, which is also great.

Neve: I don't get a choice because I picked Treviso; I believe if you don't, she isn't forced to work with the Threads. I think that would be interesting because I can still see her making that choice regardless; her pre-dragon attack quests establish that she works with both Templars and Threads depending on her goals. I will also say that I feel Aelia as a final boss fight is easily the weakest of the final showdowns but the lead in (especially the blood puppets and ESPECIALLY Hal. If they had killed Hal I would have rioted.) is so strong as is Neve's general "I am FINE" throughout (she isn't) that I don't mind. I also wonder if that is the point - that the Venatori are, in the end, simply mortal mages who are with a knack for cultivating fear and inflammatory sentiment, like any nationalist and authoritarian group. They're not demons or undead mecha or dragons or the manifestation of your own anger or forgotten evil gods; they are just shitty people.

[if-loves]

saviour

// Yandere Sunday

sum: Sunday firmly believes that only you can save him.

wc: 954

warnings: ooc sunday prob, some description of drowning

a/n: tried to make this as gn as possible, if there’s any use of gendered pronouns pls lmk! and sowwy for not posting!! hope everyone got sunday!!! and happy (early) new year!!!

likes & reblogs appreciated :)

You’ve always been a particularly devoted member of The Family. You cared not for being noticed or rewarded for your efforts, often blending in the background and doing your work behind the countless screens of Penacony. Backstage, away from the suffocating and headache-inducing fluorescent lights and cameras and worst of all the eyes of the audience, was your calling. You liked hiding.

But Sunday has always been a sharp man. He has always noticed the smallest details, the countless people who drifted between the realm of dreams and reality, and the people who kept the delicate peace. He has always noticed you.

With meticulous planning, he orchestrated your many meetings. The first was what he called an accidental run-in, the second a pleasant coincidence, the third a professional meeting with the head of Oak Family. With an innocent smile and gentle touches, he inches himself closer to you, his gloved hands brushing yours as you tell him of the many requests and suggestions proposed by guests and residents.

Sunday thinks he could fall into your eyes and drown in them. He wouldn’t struggle, is what he believes. He’d embrace the water filling his lungs, the feeling of his airway being constricted, and the darkness that consumes him once the flow of oxygen comes to a full halt. Did you feel the same, for him?

You’re good at keeping a professional front. If his light touches are affecting you somehow, you don’t show it, instead carrying on the conversation despite his dry replies. If anything, he thinks you want this meeting to be over and done with as soon as possible. The thought makes him feel sad, if not a little angry.

“And that is a summary of the most common requests and suggestions that long-time guests and residents have made. If you have the time, I would recommend reading them over individually, however I am aware that you are very busy, so I hope that the summary provides you with sufficient information in order to consider implementing the feedback from our guests and residents.” You look at him expectantly, the neatly stapled papers pushed to his side. He wishes you’d look at him differently.

“Thank you for your work. I will be sure to find some time to read over these reports, and you will be the first to know of the feedback that Penacony will implement.” He smiles at you as warmly as he can, but he knows it doesn’t quite reach his eyes. Whether you notice or not, or whether you even care, is beyond him, and it fills him with frustration. He’d do anything for a chance to pick you open and study your being, from your beating heart to the depths of your soul, if it meant that he would finally be able to understand even a little bit of you.

“The pleasure is all mine, Mr Sunday. I will be taking my leave now.” You stand and dip your head in respect, and gather your things and leave without a second glance or hesitation in your steps. He stays seated, staring at where you once were, until the sound of your footsteps fade into silence and he is left to the madness of his thoughts.

Would it be so wrong to keep you for himself? Surely no one could understand the desperate desire that has seeped into his veins, that claws at his very being every second of the day, and surely no one could quell the madness that threatens his sanity other than you, and surely no one would miss you as much as he does every waking moment. If he could be greedy just once, could it be for you? Would you let him?

-

Perhaps having the issue of the memory zone meme isn’t such a bad thing. After all, it gave Sunday the opportunity to take you away. Now, there was nowhere you could, chained to his bed and confined to his room. He feels like a giddy child as he watches you sleep in his sheets, and he’s almost afraid that he’s the one stuck in a cruel dream.

Removing the glove on his right hand, he hesitantly reaches out to touch your cheek. When your skin touches his, he swears he feels bliss and electricity all the same. A shiver runs down his spine, and he greedily rests his whole hand on your cheek. He thinks he could watch you like this for the rest of time and then some.

When you awake, you find him staring at you, a smile on his face. This one reaches his eyes, and there’s even a sparkle in them. He says it’s the sparkle of happiness, but you’re sure it’s closer to that of madness. Naturally, you thrash and struggle to no avail, and all Sunday does is watch with the same, genuine smile.

Eventually, when you tire of your fruitless struggle, he kneels and takes one of your hands in his. He brings it to his forehead, eyes closed, and you think you see a tear slip down his cheek. The light from the window behind him casts a shadow over him, and to you, he looks like the devil. However, it illuminates you, and he thinks you’ve never looked more heavenly. His saviour, his Aeon, his everything.

“Will you be my Aeon?” He asks, and although he knows that he has forsaken anything and everything holy for this moment of sin, he can’t help the pure happiness that explodes in his chest when you don’t reply. After all, in both your fields of work, no answer might as well be a vote of agreement. You wouldn’t say no to such a devoted follower, would you?

[messiahzzz]

There's nothing light hearted about it. You're all hell bent on driving marginalized people out of fandom unless they bow to you all's supremacy and dominance. I for one have deleted my blog and will not again be engaging in the BG3 fandom because of how you treat anyone who don't submit to fem!Tav/Gale dominance, I hope you're all proud of yourself.

i had to read this a few times and i genuinely still don’t understand why you would send this to me of all people???

i have always been a strong advocate for more fan content that portrays gale in mlm/queer relationships. there is literally nothing on my blog that would indicate the opposite. in fact, i have repeatedly addressed gale’s bisexuality in the past [x] [x], as well as called out the biphobia & heteronormativity within the fandom. this particular topic is an issue i feel very strongly about since it affects the experience & inclusion of many queer people within the fandom. all of the romance related content i post strictly refer to tav with gender neutral pronouns. the only exception is when i happen to talk about my own ocs, but even then they are usually directly referred to by name.

i have no interest in urging people to “submit to the fem!tav/gale dominance” as you put it or to push some sort of agenda. if anything, i’d say it’s quite the opposite. people can do with their ocs whatever they wish, it’s none of my business and frankly, neither do i care. have fun to your hearts content.

“You're all hell bent on driving marginalized people out of fandom / I hope you're all proud of yourself.”

……….who is this collective intent on sowing misery that you speak of? i am honestly perturbed by the mental gymnastics you have to do to come to the conclusion that calling out continuous plagiarism backed by explicit proof & references is actually just an act of veiled queer/transphobia. a good chunk of the fanbase are queer themselves and/or pair gale with a male oc! creating this narrative that fandom chose to single out this one specific person with the goal to “bully them off the platform”, for several people to (independently!) go through the trouble of faking receipts and evidence, solely on the basis of this person’s gender identity/their preference for mlm content is hinting at a persecution complex to say the least. quite frankly it just seems like a ploy to deflect from the issue at hand. this isn’t about “alienating & bullying” people to the point they decided to leave the fandom, in this particular case it is about escaping responsibility & refusing accountability.

deciding to distance yourself from the fandom for your own mental health is a decision you’re neither forced to announce nor one you will receive judgement for. it remains everyone’s respective responsibility to curate their experience. if spending time in this space doesn’t bring you joy for whatever reason, it’s more than okay to take a break or leave entirely to move onto more pleasant things. in the same sense, you should never feel pressured to engage or interact with anyone. you are free to block at the slightest offense and do whatever feels right for you.

[alyjojo]

Past Life 📜 Karmic Spread September 2024 - Scorpio

Preshuffle: You didn’t to go to school and you didn’t work, you were a student of life or experience - it never worried you.

Meditation: A man pulling a rope on a large ship 🛳️, a sailor - and when The Captain speaks to you, you say “Aye.” I get you building a family with your crew - or close enough to it.

~ The Past Life ~

Gender I’m Picking Up On (in the past life): Male

Character Card: Bluff 😷 - Jupiter Gemini

Who You Were: Ace of Pentacles & 9 Cups rev

What You Did: Knight of Cups rev & Ace of Wands

How It Ended: The World

Oracles: Garden & Bouquet

A sailor ⚓️, and you seem to have gotten to this place with a friend who always went with you. This grew from one friend to a whole crew, and you’re described here as “I never cared about the money”. So whatever this was, it wasn’t work to you, you wouldn’t see this as a skill when it’s simply who you are. You are the ship, the ship is you, you belong on it with these people. You pledged loyalty to a crew like some would to a country, religion, or a cause. Garden & Bouquet both talk about the bonds formed with friendships, family, community and partners - that’s what this was to you. You weren’t aware of what the rest of the world was doing, you didn’t care. I’m not seeing a pirate, fishing, or military either - and there’s no violence - it’s just a ship. Trading probably, and it wasn’t your business, you didn’t care what you were moving or where you were going, sailing is life ⛵️

The “strangest” thing about you, to others, was the fact that you never had sex. Everyone else did, religiously, wherever they went, but it was never you. You never explained yourself, I’m seeing you as a very quiet guy in a bar tipping your hat to someone that’s about to go have fun in some bedroom and you’re wishing them well - but it’s not for you. Doesn’t occur to you. This is showing that you were not attracted to women, everyone else thought you were just a little loony in the head. Or had a tragedy, an old sweetheart ♥️ you were stuck on, everyone assumed something or other. If you even did experience it - with a woman - it was not a pleasant experience but something you saw in a convoluted way, something oppressive and confusing, you didn’t enjoy it. Or you lied and said you did when you never did, just to shut people up. I see not attracted to women, I don’t see attracted to men, but it’s shown as this life being your love. I don’t think you gave it much thought tbh, you weren’t tempted, and if you were gay you never acted on any feelings or impulses. End of life is shown as the day you couldn’t make it anymore, you had to stay home, or in bed, maybe even finding a till-death home in the first place, even still alive - you died that day.

~ The Present Life ~

What Karma Was Brought With You: Judgment

Who You Brought With You: Queen of Cups

Additional energy: The Tower rev

Character Card: Egotism 😎 - Mars Leo

Achievement 🏆 - Sun Capricorn (clarified)

Oracles: Letter and Lessons & Blessings

I’m seeing a battle here between you and a Queen of Cups, could be a parent that you feel doesn’t support your dreams. I’m seeing this Letter being an opportunity, or like a college acceptance letter for example, and this being something you’re not able to do - probably because of finances. Or a fight on this level caused you to strike out on your own - or you will. You’re supposed to. I don’t think it’s for this thing though, a specific college, I don’t think so. Could be. May start that way.

Egotism shows a lesson in you about looking down on “lesser” things, like a lesser college, that’s the example they keep giving, maybe that’s the actual story. You want to go to LA and they say “we can afford Iowa State.” That’s not what you want to hear & too bad - seems to be the response. I’m seeing it as you only want the best of everything, but it’s your Judgment of what’s the best vs what is lesser that seems to be the issue. One you will continue facing all of your life - what’s really important, the title brand or the degree itself? Why are lesser things actually lesser, to you? You feel like those in charge don’t support you, largely your parents & family members. They don’t understand your dreams, your point of view, why you want what you want so bad. But you’re also determined to convince them - not hear them explain their own sides, or seek to understand them, you don’t care to hear it. My way or the highway 💯 Very stubborn.

Who you’ve brought with you - one of the people you feel doesn’t support your ideas and dreams, a Queen of Cups. There’s heavy Cancer here, they could be one, have that somewhere, or they could be your mom. It feels like Mom. Spirit is only giving you one message here: You don’t realize the trouble you avoided by not doing this. Whatever the dream was, whatever you were stopped from doing, would’ve led you in a worse direction. And they want you to be optimistic for the future, things don’t have to be one way, there are lots of ways one reaches success & you’ll get there when you’re supposed to, I’m hearing “once your perspective is adjusted.” This one feels like tough love, like you’re over here giving people problems, only you’d know 😄 The future looks good if you will allow it to be. Have faith things happen for a reason & Spirit wants you to have the best too, but like…the real best. Whatever that means.

[gnc-culture-is]

GNC culture is getting gender euphoria showing up to a new job and not explicitly coming out, but your coworkers still play the pronouns roulette every time they talk about you. I'm a binary trans man, but boy does it feel good to have people not be sure what direction I'm transitioning. Even better when one person cycles through a few sets looking for a reaction to see which is right without asking me. They're not gonna find out unless they ask lol

That sounds like a great experience! I'm very happy for you, and I wish you a very pleasant confusing everyone.

[the-bumbling-furby]

heyo! i wanted to make a post about my personal opinions on the 2023 Furby

[pt: heyo! i wanted to make a post about my personal opinions on the 2023 Furby /end pt]

first off: i do not condone any hate towards the 2023 Furby or the people who like it! the Furby fandom is all about embracing weirdness, and the reaction to the newest Furby shouldn’t be any different

out of respect for those who like the new Furbys, all of my negative opinions will be kept under the cut

i also will not be adding image descriptions as i don’t have the energy right now, so please feel free to add them on

that being said, let’s get into it!

things i like:

[pt: things i like /end pt]

the color palette

while it can definitely be a little bit overstimulating, i really enjoy all of the new Furby color palettes! they’re bright and fun while also not being too busy. i think that the colors work well together and look really neat

the lights

i honestly really liked the lights, especially how they glow through the ears! they look super neat and add a nice touch of personality. the range of colors as well as the transitions between were a pleasant surprise

customizability

the possibilities for customization of these Furbys are honesty impressive, and even in the few months they’ve been out i’ve seen so many cool 2023 customs! unlike the boom and connect (no shade to them), the eyes are fully able to be painted while still working. i honestly can’t wait until we get to see some oddbody and longified versions of these guys

[source 1] [source 2] [source 3]

the homage to 1998 Furby in the packaging

i'm not sure how many people actually noticed this as i haven’t seen it mentioned yet, but on the interior packaging there’s a gen 1 Furby on the shelf in 2023 Furby’s room! i thought that it was a super sweet touch and it made me smile as i was opening up my own 2023 Furby :)

no app!

it was honestly super relieving for me that there’s no app for the newest Furby. the apps for the boom and connect were great ideas, but they were very finicky and then got discontinued after the generation ended. i’m personally glad that the 2023 Furby can do everything on it’s own with no app add-ons

things i didn’t like (under cut):

[pt: things i didn’t like (under cut) /end pt]

the voice

honestly the voice gave me such a headache. i can’t quite put my finger on it, but the pitch combined with the quality of the voice just made it super hard to listen to. i know this is a personal thing, but it really made me enjoy this Furby a lot less than i could have. here’s a video of my 2023 Furby, if you haven’t heard one:

lack of animation/life

while the mechanics were pretty well done, i think that there was a severe lack of depth or life in how the 2023 Furby moves and looks. i won’t talk about the beak since everyone already has, but the lack of a moving beak is one of the many contributors to the overall lack of animation. with how many times Furby has been rebooted, i personally think that the (artificial) life of Furby has been deprived more and more

stereotypically gendered marketing

while i don’t like gender stereotypes, it’s very clear that Hasbro had a target audience for this new Furby. with both the language and design of the 2023 Furby, it is less enjoyable and socially acceptable for young boys to have. while i wish this weren’t the case, this kind of rigid and targeted marketing is unfortunately something that needs to be considered

repetitive and very little evolution

while each of the other generations had something that varied their interactions, i felt that this one had a lot less of that. with the 1998's learning of english, the 2005's range of emotions, the 2012's different personalities, and the 2016's different personalities and reactions to things, i felt like there was something missing in the 2023 Furby. The actions felt repetitive, and the occasional song addition wasn't enough to keep me really interested. the repetition started to get on my nerves a bit and i ended up turning my Furby off

thank you for reading, and remember this is just my personal opinion. please don't let this post dictate or change how you feel about the newest Furby!

[pt: thank you for reading, and remember this is just my personal opinion. please don't let this post dictate or change how you feel about the newest Furby! /end pt]