#wish we didn't have to work this week this is just not something we want to deal with during 9 hour workdays
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beanarie · 2 days ago
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i never wanted water once part 3
tommy is also breakup baking, prompted by my dear @sanguinarysanguinity
tw: mention of parent death, mention of child abuse
part 1
part 2
~
Gutierrez eyes him on his way out of the locker room. "Feel like no one ever sees you anymore. You coming back to the pickup game or what?"
"Oh." Tommy gives his damp hair one last rub from the towel. "I wasn't planning on it, to be honest. Too awkward."
Gutierrez frowns. "Why?"
"You know," Tommy says, wishing he didn't have to, "Eddie Diaz. I broke up with his best friend."
"Diaz hasn't shown in weeks. Probably got injured. You know how that crew is."
And that. Well. He and Eddie were friends. They became tight very quickly in a way Tommy hasn't experienced with many people. He shouldn't have thrown a connection like that away without at least trying to salvage it.
He sends a text, a polite, generic one asking about his welfare. Worst thing that can happen is Eddie tells him to fuck off and he's back where he started. He fully expects to be left on read.
He does not expect Eddie to tell him he's moving back to Texas because he's given up on his son deciding to come home. Eddie invites him to a pre-going away dinner at a bar and grill before he goes down South for a few days to scout out homes. And, no, absolutely not. But Tommy proposes getting a drink, just the two of them. Eddie very validly explains that he can't spare the time, since he's already started packing up his life and he's working overtime to save up for a down payment. Tommy gets it. He does.
The day after the dinner, Eddie calls him. "Hey, man. I know we're like two ships passing in the night, but I didn't want to leave without a proper goodbye. I still got some more shifts before I move for good, but the time will go by quick. We'll just stay on the line, okay? Keep me company while I go through my kitchen cabinets."
"It's good to hear from you," Tommy says honestly.
"So yeah." Eddie hums. "Why'd you do it?"
"Text you?" Tommy says. "I heard that-"
"Kinard," Eddie says, unamused.
"Yeah. Sorry."
"You just didn't seem the type to flee."
None of you know me as well as you thought you did, Tommy doesn't say. That's not fair to any of them. "I wasn't, in the past. Well, I tried not being that. A couple times. It didn't work out."
"Oh," Eddie says. "There it is."
"There what is?"
"You've got shit."
"Haven't we all?"
"Hey, I am not denying that." Eddie chuckles. "Do you plan on dealing with it, or letting it blow up every good thing you find until you die?"
"Jesus, Eddie."
"What's the point in mincing words? You did something dumb and destructive. What kinda friend would I be if I let that go without saying anything?"
"So what's the weather even like in El Paso? Does it ever get below 100?"
After a groan, Eddie lets Tommy talk about his shit, about Texas, parenthood, and chess clubs, for the rest of the call. Tommy can't say that he'll miss him. He missed him already and now he gets to continue doing so. All of this sucks.
Tommy tries his hand at gnocchi made with ricotta, lemon, and pepper that subsequently almost causes a fistfight during B shift.
Demetra favors him with a warm smile, taking in the large box in his hands. "Tom, right? Welcome! What's all this?"
"Tommy," he says easily, impressed she remembered his name at all. He hasn't been to this slightly dusty community center in five or six years. "Uh, this is garlic knots and mini calzones."
"Well, hey. You're even more welcome than before. Come take a seat."
December is a stupid time to rejoin group, many of the participants close to the edge from a cocktail of seasonal depression, missing dead loved ones, and generalized loneliness. Tommy knew it would be like this going in. He counted on it. Everyone will have so much to say that there likely won't be any time for him to open his mouth. He's not ready to spill. It will help to just soak in the atmosphere of unashamed honesty for a while.
At his third meeting, Cal, a slender guy in his mid twenties with a curly mohawk, keeps bringing up his mother. "She never wanted me to enlist," he says, "and now that I'm back home and struggling, she can't stop being all 'I told you so' morning, noon, and night. She never says it, but she is thinking it."
"Is she?" Tommy finds himself asking. "Or are you putting something on her that isn't there?"
"Maybe so." Cal pops one of Tommy's fried ravioli in his mouth and chews thoughtfully. "I don't know, I should probably give her a chance, think first about what she's actually saying before I react. But it's hard in the moment, you know?"
"Tommy?" Demetra says a minute later, making him feel like a kid being called on by the teacher. "How's your relationship with your mom?"
"Nonexistent. She died when I was fifteen." He crosses his ankles. "Fell asleep in the car on our way back from an away game and we couldn't wake her up. Heart attack."
Demetra frowns sympathetically. "That must've been hard for a kid to witness."
"I've seen so much worse since then. People shot in the head by machine guns, people covered in burns over most of their bodies..."
Demetra shakes her head slightly. "They weren't your mom."
He ducks his head, pressing his lips together. "True. It's just- That's not- It's not trauma. I don't fear falling asleep and not waking up."
"What do you fear?" Cal asks.
Being left, being hurt, being validated in his belief that no one will ever see him for all he is and choose to stick around. "Standard stuff, really. Clowns, taxes, drivers on the freeway."
He gets a pity laugh, a groan or two, and one outright glare. "Okay, okay." He exhales loudly. "Ending up alone by someone else's choice rather than mine."
"So you're cool with being on your own, as long as you're the one keeping everyone away," Cal says.
God, that sounds idiotic. "Yes?"
"You prefer it like this?" asks a woman about his own age wearing a green bomber jacket.
He shrugs. "It's not ideal, but as far as worst case scenarios go, it's okay. It's fine."
"It's spineless," says a gray-haired man with a Desert Storm hat.
Tommy doesn't flinch. "Yeah, that's kind of an inherent character trait. I keep thinking I got it licked, then it shows up wearing another face. Scared of my dad, so I joined the army and became someone he couldn't hurt anymore. Scared of people knowing I was gay, so I waited to come out until I was surrounded by brand new people. Scared of my boyfriend leaving, so." He pushes at the skin above his knees, kneading it. "So I left him first."
"You fall back," says Bomber Jacket. Her name is Annie or Angie. She has conflicted feelings about dating a man with kids. "It's easy to stop being scared when the thing that scared you is far away."
He hears Eddie. You just didn't seem the type to flee.
Demetra holds up a hand. Tommy's face must be doing something concerning. "No one here faults you for what you did to survive. Is it still serving you, is the question, or is that just what you're used to?"
He doesn't bake when he gets home. He drinks half the beers in his fridge and does a shockingly efficient job of cleaning his house, while drafting and deleting twenty-seven different texts. He then wakes up the next day, and goes to the pickup game.
Gutierrez scores four rebounds on him and doesn't shut up about it for the rest of their next shift. Tommy grumbles, and talks shit, and promises he won't have much to brag about next time.
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jellyskink · 2 days ago
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The Tooth And The Following Headache. (A cringey crackship)
"Alright Pines, you're good to go now. You remember where the exit is yeah?"
(Geez, the more I see this guy the MORE I find myself needin' to buy another pack of cold ones for the week.)
The day was about as fun as you'd expect it to be with "him" around. I was just about to have a good day too, of course things would go wrong as soon as I was about to relax and finish up work.
Ford Pines had his monthly appointment with me today, an appointment that I was booked with because of Oleander's meddling probably.
"Yes Dr.Ibis, I remember. H-How is everything looking if I may ask?"
(Horrible, if I was presented this during dental school I'd probably have thought it was the BEFORE photo, not AFTER.)
"Eh, I've seen worse. But you're doin' better than last time."
(That was a lie and a truth both in the correct order. Geez what HAS this freak been doing? The first time I saw him I was surprised he hadn't kicked the bucket or passed out at the very least from what problems he was dealing with. It was almost like I was checking off everything in the book on what was wrong with this guy. I mean, damn if I didn't know better I'd assume this guy was eating glass for fun or something.)
"R-really? Oh my Muse will be so pleased! The care you and Dr. Oleander have been providing me has been astronomically wonderful! My muse certainly knows how to find the best people to introduce me to!"
(Ugh, here we go again. "My muse" this, "my muse" that. I wish he'd can it about that damn triangle, the problems that kindergartner art project looking thing have been causing have been one of my biggest headache bringers to date.)
"Yep, he sure does. Now can we get along to the part where we just schedule your next appointment? I'm a very busy man you know, patients to see and all that."
"Of course! I'll need to run it by my Muse before it's finalized, but I can certainly get the word to him!"
"Sure thing bud."
(Thank god, this is going quicker than I thought. I really hate having this guy ruin the mood in my office with his... everything. What did Irene even see in this guy? This wacko clearly didn't have a personality besides being a sad clingy puppy dog whose entire being was dedicated to his "Muse".)
(Irene was pretty secretive about certain things regarding that guy whenever we ended up talking over the phone or the occasional coffee. Which for a normal doctor that'd be expected, patient confidentiality and all that. But Irene crossed that line long ago as soon as she took him on as one of her patients.)
(The guy wasn't extremely interesting to my knowledge outside of his extra fingers. If anything he was boring or weird, sometimes both at the same time. The guy wasn't particularly charming, he did LOOK handsome, and OCCASIONALLY wasn't the worst to be around, but geez I hated everything else about the guy.)
"Ah Dr.Ibis before I forget, I have something for you."
(OH GOD NOT THIS AGAIN.)
Before I even had a chance to react any further, Mr.Triangle lover quickly reached into his bag and pulled out something small with reddish-brown fur and held it out to me.
(What even is that? Is that a hamster? No, it was a vole. He brought me a freaking vole. It wasn't even alive. And he was holding it out to me with that stupid smile of his.)
I don't know what came over me, but the next thing I knew I slapped the dead rodent out of his six fingered hand. As it smacked the ground, I saw my patient flinch and begin to step back from me.
"GET YOUR DAMN ROADKILL AWAY FROM ME!"
"I-I'm sorry for upsetting you Dr.Ibis, I only wanted to-"
"What? I don't want to hear about how your "Muse" gave you dead rats as gifts again! It's disgusting! I can't stand dead animals! I don't want you to act like your dramn crazy mu-"
I wasn't even able to finish the sentence before I felt myself getting pushed against the wall with enough force to knock the wind out of me. I winced from the surprise as I began to process what happened.
It was that... that... Six fingered psycho!
(What the hell!? What is he doing??)
I was always kinda worried about this guy being the reason why someone ended up hurt, I never expected him to be the literal reason for it!
"DR. IBIS."
An unexpected tone shift from what I was used to from the guy, his voice was now booming and gruff.
(OKAY I'M REALLLY NOT USED TO HIM BEING SO LOUD OR AGGRESSIVE.)
"PLEASE... WATCH WHAT YOU SAY... ABOUT MY MUSE..." His tone lowered into a raspy hiss as the words fell from his mouth.
I really wanted to respond to him, to fight back, SOMETHING. And yet I found myself frozen with fear.
The next thing I know, I felt a rough, trembling hand tilt my head up. My field of vision focusing on the unhinged man in front of me.
"BAD THINGS... HAPPEN TO THOSE W-WHO UPSET HIM..."
(I-is he? Crying? What the hell?? Why is HE the one that's upset here? He was the one who flipped out on me!)
I didn't have much time to process everything as he moved away from me. I heard a loud crunch from the side of me as he did.
(THE HELL?? Did he break something??)
I glanced to the side of me instinctively, there was a hole in the hall next to me.
(Okkkaaay. Well it definitely wasn't the first time the office drywall got punched or broken. Whether that was ever by me at times was something that was a secret I wasn't going to tell any higher ups anytime soon.)
"Hey... Mr.Pines?"
"..."
The guy slowly walked over to the wall at the opposite side of the room, a blank stare on his face, a crimson fluid leaking from one hand onto the floor as he held it to his side, while his other hand clutched his creepy locket to his heart.
Before I could continue speaking, he began whisper to himself while facing the wall.
"i'msorryi'msorryi'msorryi'msorryi'msorryi'msorryi'msorryi'msorryi'msorryi'msorryi'msorryi'msorryi'msorryi'msorryi'msorryi'msorryi'msorryi'msorryi'msorryi'msorry."
His head banging against the wall with eerie tempo as he spoke in a whispered voice, his tone now monotone.
"Mr.Pines??"
(What the hell? I knew this guy was probably insane but this was taking it a whole new level!)
"I'MSORRYI'MSORRYI'MSORRYI'MSORRYI'MSORRYI'MSORRYI'MSORRYI'MSORRYI'MSORRYI'MSORRYI'MSORRYI'MSORRYI'MSORRYI'MSORRYI'MSORRYI'MSORRY."
The horrid tempo was now picking up speed.
"STANDFORD STOP IT!"
"..."
(He finally responded?)
The room was eerily silent as I tried to process what had even happened. After what felt like an eternity of sitting in awkward silence, the unhinged man I was watching turned around to face me again.
"U-um Dr.Ibis? Forgive me, I spaced out while we were about to finish our conversation earlier. W-what were we speaking about?"
A pretty nasty bruise was now starting to form on his forehead.
(THE HELL DO YOU MEAN WHAT WERE WE TALKING ABOUT??? WTF WAS THAT???)
I did my best to collect myself. I vaguely some of the info Oleander shared with me about her patient. I think she mentioned how he had certain traumatic triggers or something?? Damnit now I wish I had paid better attention to her phone call that day as she yammered on.
"It... wasn't important. Just...if you're going to leave me dead animals, do ya mind if perhaps you wrap them up before handing me them or something?"
"I-it isn't traditional I suppose, b-but I'll check in with my muse if I could be given grace to do that sort of thing. Forgive me, I don't mean to screw up showing my thanks to you..."
(Geez and now we're back to another episode of watching the saddest man ever. Ick, Oleander I swear you owe me big time for all these bones I'm throwing your patient.)
"Listen I appreciate it, in a way... I just prefer.... live animals? And I don't like rodents very much."
"I-I see... well I can't promise my muse will be happy with any changes, but I'll keep note of that."
"Listen Stan-"
"StanFORD."
"Stanford. Why don't we just pretend today didn't happen? I'm pretty tired today, and it looks like you could use some rest too."
"I... suppose my muse might not mind that. I don't think I can rest, but I know what you mean."
"Thank you Stanford. Now... why don't I drive you over to Oleander's office for a sec? I think she needed to see you for a second."
(Pleasedon'tputupafightohgodIdon'twantyoudyinginmyofficeIdon'twanttodealwiththepaperworkoranyotheraxhahstingproblemsthat'dcomefromthathappening!!)
"I-I suppose it wouldn't be too much trouble as long as we don't take TOO long. My muse seems to trust some of her judgement a lot..."
"Yeahh... well I'm just going to close up shop now.
"Of course Dr.Ibis."
(Irene I swear to god you owe me big time on top of a LONG conversation about what's the plan for your patient in the long term. If I'm going to be dragged along with you on your quest to be the queen of bleeding hearts I don't want to end up sinking with you.
Geez I need a drink after this, guess I'll be needing to buy TWO packs of cold ones from the store after this "fun" work day.)
Unfortunately for future me, one of the new "gifts" I'd start to get from Standford FREAKING Pines were eyebats. Live ones. And they were just as annoying as him. Easier to get rid of though...
(AHH I HAD SO MUCH FUN WRITING THIS. I thought I'd gve it a go with writing in a more first person style when it came to a Dr.Ibis focused fic.
Yes I was possessed by a 14 year old girl harnessessing wattpad, ao3, and tiktok as I wrote this, but the idea of these two having a genuine friendship/relationship sounds hilarious to me.
I hope you liked my attempts at channeling Yusuf energy! Unfortunately he does have the tsundere curse a bit because this is a enemies to lovers kind of fic lmaoo. Hopefully the Ford energy wasn't the worst either??
I totally loved your fic other anon fanfic writer! With Jellyskink's permission we should definitely team up and write many cringey and wonderful fanfictions for this au!
Speaking of which, I'm glad once again people liked my silly little Oleander and Calamari fic! The little trickster kitty is now one of my favorite things about the au!
I love that Calamari was in the cat show Ford lost in! I'm guessing she might've won?
Either way, totally looking forward to the rivalry between Ford and Calamari lmaooo!!)
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OKAY I LOVE THIS
Ibis is like "why are the hot ones always crazy"
Thank you for writing for my sad dumpling again!!! 💖💖
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lilowoof · 3 months ago
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ngl gamers, I think I'm gonna inevitably lose to the hormones and depression in the near future XD
Can't bring myself to be active cause I'm using a lot of energy to not vent post all the time. But fuck it, into the tags I go!
#I want NO MESSAGES regarding this. let me just be upset and alone#you spend most of your life trying to not succumb to sick brain but honestly I don't think it's worth it in the long run#my life is for better or worse....decent. but I've lost the drive and happiness to really DO anything a long time ago. like whats the point#the only reason I havent killed myself yet is cause Im too lazy (and dont have access to a gun for a quick getaway)#and I'm saying all this DESPITE having stuff to look forward to in the near future. it's like AUGH whats the POINT IM always gonna suffer#why does mental health take such a toll on ppl. this shit sucks ass. and I still feel excited for things in the future too? somehow?#but I also really want to die so. idk man. idk. maybe if I fall in love with someone then I can be distracted but all my walls are up#what's the point in anything anymore. *I* have to take the steps to improve myself and my situation#and I'd rather die. anyways who wants to make a pact that once we reach 40 we will marry each other#that might be fun#also my brain has gotten so bad that I am literally considering joining a hiking club to get out more and I FUCKING HATE HIKING#but I should probably do something out of my comfort zone to push myself and who knows maybe I will find a new passion#but let me tell you about the anxiety - oh BOY it's starting to act up again. hahahha#ah well sometimes you just need to scream your feelings out in the tags to get a lil clarity from the brain fog#one day I will fucking die/kill myself but for now I'll just try to make the best out of. whatever the hell this stupid life is. *shrug*#(but hey if any professional hitmen are reading this. feel free to. heh. you know ;) )#also I need to get back to art#gotta do my paid work and that one pic I lined months ago. and clay stuff *continues to bed rot another week because hahahahahahaha*#ah I wish I didn't fail all those years ago. then I would be free. I wish I was free#ok goodnight I promised myself that I would do paid work when I wake up tomorrow so hopefully no more migraines -pray emoji-
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triglycercule · 22 days ago
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duuude i never thought it would be this bad that i literally saw art of my trio. joking around and laughing and having fun. and not immediately smiling and being like yeah this is silly theyd do this. something is clearly wrong
#if the things that are supposed to make me happy dont make me happy then what the fuck do i do#this is not very nice of a joke to play on me brain i need to distract myself#i've been far too connected with reality for too long this past 2 weeks i need to disconnect and sink into the internet#i need to take in as much as i can before it all gets banned#i am so so so incredibly pessimistic and i do not believe that much will get better#but goddamn it it's not like i have anything else to do but live#things wont get better but death can't be that much of a salvation i'm sure#i've experienced enough satisfaction and happiness in my life to not want to end it#even when this seems impossible to get through and horrendous#i've seen a small glimspe of what freedom tasted like at least. at least i grew up with it#UN and biden if you can hear us do something pls..... pls....... a recount MIGHT do something but like. what could it really do#i really doubt a recount will do much. sure there was voter fraud and people's votes didn't get counted#but like. maybe 20 million people really just didn't show up. maybe they actually didn't do as well campaigning as we thought#it was either live in nazi germany or live a normal ass fucking life and nazi germany was chosen#but whatever i guess. not like anything i'll do to go against it will be listened to. just gotta pack up my stuff and get back to work#i miss the murder time trio#now would be a good time for them to fufill my wish of killing me i thinn#tricule rant
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born-to-lose · 2 years ago
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Missing people and regretting shit o'clock
#why did i even let it come this far. 7 fucking months and i didn't realize what was going wrong so i could have saved it#i want him back fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck#was thinking of this notebook i filled for him with memories and poetry and quotes and general mushy things and goddamn#why am i crying i just looked at my desk and i don't have the heart to put everything in a box so i don't see it every day when i wake up#i know i can't change it and it's probably over for good now after i fucked some things up extra hard but fuck do i miss him#i wish i could have done something in time before even the thought of breaking up came up#just when i thought for once things are working out for me and it was really fucking good and happy until a week before it ended#guess i just can't be happy. i never could#i was really really willing to talk things out and fix whatever needs to be fixed while staying together#not go separate ways and maybe not so maybe definitely not possibly maybe see if we can try again in the future#which we (spoiler) apparently won't and i kinda came to terms with that but i still wish there was a possibility#or at least i would have liked to know from the beginning and not spend weeks hoping for a reunion and working towards that specifically#while i seem to be the only one with that goal#idk i just wish it had been more thought through and talked about properly so there wouldn't be the misunderstandings we deal with now#and like boundaries for the first two months or so after that but it takes two i guess#disclaimer i'm not bitter or mad at anyone just sad and nostalgic. if the person in question reads this i love you ok that won't change#deleting later but now i need to go back to sleep before i kill myself on a whim#mel talks#depressed bitch posting#i know i know i know i did some shit too that wasn't great and i'm not saying i'm innocent here i'm just so depressed about the situation#it's been seven goddamn weeks it never took me this long to get over anything before
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theladygazingatemptiness · 16 days ago
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#wak#negative /#tag vent /#man.. why is everything so draining#like.. fr it seems like I can't do Anything for an extended amount of time without burning out and wanting to quit#like. when I was little it was my absolute dream to be able to do nothing but draw all day every day but#now as an adult the thought of it stresses me out and makes me sick to my stomach#I used to get so excited about getting commissions but#now every time I see that someone's commissioned me I just dread doing it as if it's something I'm getting graded for in two days#(note that this isn't a slight against people who've commed me by any means. if you've commed me you're a saint)#(but. that's just how I feel and I wish it wasn't)#which is why comms are closed rn and idk when I'm opening them back up#rn I'm doing commission-based editing/proofreading work for a small publishing comp#something that I Also once aspired to do full-time#but.. I'm already kinda getting tired of it? probably bc my current project is 140+ pages that I have to get done in two weeks#like.. it's not Bad and I'm not quitting (I don't have a choice anyway. this is the closest thing I have rn to a consistent-ish job)#but it.. just gets less fun w every manuscript and I hate that#and like... whenever I go out no matter where I am I just want to go back home#I have no 'dream job' anymore. I have no goals. I don't want to go places or do things I just want to be home sleeping#but. as we all know that's not an option in the capitalist hellscape we live in#hell... even if we Didn't live in the hellscape it probably still wouldn't be an option lol#and of course my mom will not hear any of it and just thinks I'm being spoiled and lazy and 'using my aut as an excuse'#and most people including supposed '''''leftists'''' would probably agree with her too#bc 95% of '''"radical communists''''' on here are Adults Aren't Allowed To Exist Outside Of Working And That's How Things Should Be truther#who vocally treat unemployment as a moral failing and as a Bad Person Trait™ inbetween making Capitalism Bad posts#but I'm getting offtopic. Maybe I Am Useless And Lazy And A Leech Or Etc#but what I'm trying to say is I feel like I'm going to be miserable and feel like just a machine no matter what I do#and like I'm never going to have a happy or fulfilling life#and that my only option is to go to sleep never wake up and hope I'm reborn with no mental illnesses or trauma and into a rich family#but.. fat chance.
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neverendingford · 24 days ago
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#tag talk#watching media not in English is honestly so fun. my brain loves trying to pick out sentence structure and individual words#as someone who was obsessed with writing and learning codes as a kid it's unsurprising#I've realized that I very well could finally become multilingual and it's a really exciting thought#I just wish language learning apps didn't suck so much. I very well might have to start keeping a notebook for vocabulary#but I've been watching Puerta 7 and listening exclusively to music in Spanish for about the past week#and next year my brother and I are gonna take Spanish together at the community college once we move#cause he wants to travel internationally and maybe live abroad so language learning would be super useful#he's not as good with language as I am but that'll just mean I get to help him with it#anyway. I think I'm gonna dig out a notebook and start planning how I'm gonna do this#I really really wanna get good enough to read books and articles in Spanish. cause reading is cool and great and builds vocab#I think this is only possible now that I've been medicated for a while.#like. I wish I could have done this years ago but I accept the fact that I've been on a journey#and chasing your dreams is only possible once you're in a position to do so. my brain was too fucked before.#so external motivation was the only way I could make progress. whereas now I have the ability to internally motivate.#I can do dishes. clean my room. fold laundry. make food. and finally learn a language in my own way.#I wish language learning apps didn't fucking suck so doggamn much. they're really the worst. even as a kid I hated Rosetta Stone.#I needed to find my own way to learn and I'm still figuring it out but I will. I know I will.#I will be successful and I will chase the things I love in life and even if things go wrong I will work to improve my life#and part of that self actualization is learning the language I've grown up with and yet never learned. and then I can learn other languages#because I genuinely wanna learn a lot of languages. hell I taught myself a little bit of spoken elvish as a kid. it's in my blood I guess.#being monolingual is genuinely distressing for me tbh.#shit I should ask my sibling for book recommendations and I can buy something to start pulling vocabulary from.#for now I can pull words from songs or tv. that's a good starting point. even if I prefer the aesthetic of studying a book#except first I'm gonna fold my laundry and change my bedsheets#bye y'all
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darkdragon768 · 1 month ago
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I feel like crying.
#dragon's stupid thoughts#today sucked#first that shit with the docs appointment - this happened already once before and I think it was the same receptionist and I think she#remembered last time too. fucking sucks TWICE AS MUCH#then my gold randomizer didn't want to work the way I wanted it to#the magmatoar in my fire type only brilliant diamond run disobeys me cuz it's traded#and the worst of all: my co intern at work#she makes me always feel so miserable#the way she's ''jokingly mocking'' me drives me crazy. and then she's always like ''omg. don't take everything so seriously 😒😒🙄🙄''#*while playing minecraft* she: 'oooh i see your house! your house that's made out of wood! and i coincidentally have a flint stone with me!#and when I told her to stay away she got offended and told me i can't take a joke#i think this was yesterday#today she was telling the teen i was playing with to punch me so i fall down#previously (some weeks ago. the first ones of the internship even?) she told like every teen that we were playing with to attack and kill m#I've already mentioned the uno one once but. where she sets up rules which obviously malefit me specifically#if you ask ''whos turn is it'' you have to draw a punishment card#this rule just makes me say nothing anymore. fuck you. i won't say a thing every again.#i feel like an idiot because of her#i already have a low self esteem / confidence and then denying that my beanie hat add coolness to me (for me) just makes me feel awful#makes me feel like a clown#i feel like trash thanks to her. hope you're happy and found some joy in making fun of me. in ridiculing me.#i fucking hated today but heeeyyyy at least i started the comic!! joy..#[ETA:#all of this made me wish once again that I have some SO waiting for me at home. that they are excited and happy to see me.#then we'll drink hot chocolate together. on a couch getting all cozy with fluffy blankets. cuddling and snuggling. while I tell them about#my day. then I'll watch them play something. maybe animal crossing. and I'll be slowly falling asleep on their shoulder. then they'll lift#me up and carry me to my bed and tug me in. and like just in general make me feel loved and valued#is this too much to ask for#]
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joshuamj · 2 months ago
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can college just like, pause for a moment. I wanna catch up on linktober :(
#josh talks#college as always is kicking my ass#god i wish homework weren't a thing#like i do admit sometimes it can be helpful. like in math i really do need to do homework#cuz i have a shit memory so i really do need to practice#but most homework!! is meaningless busy work!!!!!#read one of my class's syllabi (?) and it said to be ready to spend 6-12 hours a week on homework outside of class#like bro wtf#i literally almost didnt graduate highschool because of homework.#like my grade of in class work would be really really good but i literally failed so many classes because of homework#and nothing else#shoutout to my chem teacher who was the first to realize that it wasn't laziness#he came up to me and pointed out all my grades of in-class assignments and they were literally all 100%#so like. he knew i knew this stuff but he also knew that it likely wasnt laziness or i probably wouldnt be doing#quite that well in in-class stuff too#like he told me that i knew what i was doing. and he told me that he knew i was smart and capable#and it really meant a lot to hear that from a teacher.#cuz he wasn't saying this stuff to then just express disappointment in me not completing homework or anything#no he was a little concerned about me and wanted to help#and i hadn't ever really had a teacher tell me something like that before without a “but...”#some of my favorite teachers ive ever had are the ones who aren't afraid to compliment their students#more teachers need to learn that telling your students that theyve done well is a really good thing to do#cuz goddamn all throughout our education we are only ever told negative things#only ever get points knocked off. only ever get criticism and things to do better next time#i remember the first time i ever got feedback on an english essay that was positive#took me until junior year of highschool. cuz up until then my essays either needed a lot of work#or met the requirements and thus didn't need any comments made on it. cuz for some reason school is allergic#to telling students anything that isn't negative#it was baffling to get comments on what i did well. on my strengths in writing (that i didnt even know i had!)#and even just to be told that it was an enjoyable read
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namelessweapons · 3 months ago
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might make chuuya a sona as a gift
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bladeofthestars · 3 months ago
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#personal#i used to constantly be so emo on here lol#i probably still would be if i still felt all the same feelings#i feel like i'm a better person now#i feel like i have more talents now#i've been breaking into a job field that doesn't make me want to kill myself#i'm trying to make a game with my partner and maybe that'll finally be our big break. who knows.#but.......#i still feel like i don't super have friends#i've tried to be friends with some new people and it keeps not working out#i have a hard time picking good people#i don't live near most of my old friends any more so i can't osmose their friends#it's rough#i thought i could maybe be friends with my boss from my last job but HAHAHAHA#i thought i WOULD be friends with someone i worked with in the job before that but i fucked that up real good#the friends i have in town don't see me often#the person i currently think of as my best friend (other than my partner) is good friends with me and my partner#we were hanging out really frequently#but he's started not responding to invites to even say no#he's got a lot of anxiety and depression and frequently self isolates for weeks at a time#but it's just. i've been dropped so many times now that i'm kind of conditioned to think i must've done something wrong#and that he must be mad at one or both of us#it's hard to get some of my other longer distance friends to agree to hang out. partially bc they're so freaking popular#they've always got something going on#i have to get in the rotation lmao#i miss being in the dorms -_-#guaranteed had multiple someones to hang out with daily#wish i could grab lunch and dinner with two separate friends and study for a bit after dinner with a third#i cherished what i had while i had it#but still feel like i somehow didn't appreciate it enough lmao
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nightingale-prompts · 1 month ago
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Beautiful Ghost-DC x DP prompt
Part of the Accidental Ghost Courting AU 》 HERE
We finally get Tim's perspective on Danny
If there is one thing everyone on campus knows it's that Danny Nightingale is hot. Not in the stereotypical supermodel or Hollywood way. He was so attractive it was scary like he dropped out of a fairy tale.
Tim first saw Danny after whispers started going around. He spotted Danny in the library walking towards the observatory on the top floor.
At first glance, you'd call him a goth and there was no shortage of people who'd love to date one. It's probably why no one shuts up about him. But Tim could tell this wasn't the corporate punk type goth that he saw Damian scrolling through on his phone. Tim was quick to tease Damian and stop what would inevitably become a phase.
No, Danny had a clear style. Classic gothic...but also not. It's hard to explain. His clothes looked handmade, straight out of the 1800s. Did he thrift or make them himself? He was an astronomy major right? Or was is engineering?
Danny looked almost ethereal. Tall, lean, and almost glowing skin. It wasn't until later that Tim would be close enough to see the way his skin sort of glittered in low light.
People parted to not obstruct Danny's path as he went toward the observatory.
Everyone knew that Danny was off limits, too cowardly to get the courage to ask him out and risk rejection. So Danny remained unreachable.
Tim paid it no mind. He acknowledged that Danny was good-looking but there wasn't much else that got his attention. Danny didn't pay attention to others.
But Tim couldn't help but notice that Danny was always alone in his own little world. There was a hint of longing in him. Tim might have overheard a few things.
Danny would usually be in the library reading eclectic materials, playing with tarot cards, and studying star charts. Other days he was in the greenhouse tending to a little corner of plants he was growing. He seemed bored. He looked like he'd rather be somewhere else.
Tim might have done some research. Just scrolling through Danny's social media. Pictures of friends and graveyards. Most of the landscape photos were taken after his arrival in Gotham. Tim gathered that Danny was alone out here and far from home. He could fit in easily around here but simply chose not to.
It wasn't until that faithful day when Danny offered him a bundle of red carnations and a cup of Death Wish coffee.
"You looked like you need this." He said smiling.
And wow...that smile. Tim didn't think he'd ever see a smile like that. It was a sort of lopsided smile, a bit clumsy but sweet. Danny had elongated canines. Were they fake or was it a medical condition?
Tim didn't know how to respond to Danny's offer but he wouldn't say no to a cup of coffee.
Over the next few weeks, Tim found himself on campus more often and hanging around Danny. Danny tended to be very generous. Always gave things to Tim, most of which he made himself. That is what made it all feel genuine. On cold days Danny always had a hot cup of coffee or tea. When it was sunny he had something sweet freshly baked. When it rained he had flowers to brighten the room. When it was foggy he wanted to go find something fun to do. Danny also worked at the flower shop nearby which was said to be haunted by the old owners.
Rumors spread more and more that Danny wasn't human, like some kind of fae that took human form. Was there a chance it was true? Yes. Does that mean that Tim was going to test that?
Yes.
So Tim just wanted to test that theory and gave Danny a bracelet that looked similar to the ones he usually had. It just so happened to be made of Iron. Tim felt bad about it (kinda) but it was just genuine curiosity.
But no Danny wasn't a fae. He was incredibly happy to get a gift though so no harm done.
Another thing Tim noticed was Danny's eyes. They weren't blue like he thought. Danny had central heterochromia. He had a ring of bright green near his iris surrounded by icy blue. Not that Tim was staring at his eyes or anything, just that no one ever mentions that part when describing Danny. It's pretty notable you know. More people should know that.
...
.....
It's normal to think that.
Anyways Tim and Danny meet up when they can. Danny likes visiting graveyards and abandoned churches. Not that he doesn't like the movies or arcades because he loves that stuff. But one time after a late class he dragged Tim with him on a scenic drive out of the city to this spot he found. It was this massive cliff just far enough from the city that you could see the stars.
Tim never really gave much thought to the stars. He's seen them thousands of times especially being carried around by Kon or on the Watchtower. But right then watching Danny fiddle with his telescope babbling on about the planets and far-off galaxies, the stars felt new and wondrous.
Was this what it felt like to be normal? Just a college kid going on a spontaneous road trip with a friend, not thinking about patrols or duties.
He liked it.
Danny had a way of making him forget about the rest of the world. Someone not linked to heroes and assassins. A friend, a weird one but one he didn't have to be Robin with. He was just Tim to Danny. Not Tim Wayne, not Tim Drake, just Tim.
Because of that, he wanted to keep Danny as far from his family as possible. They already think they were dating and he'd be damned if they scared Danny away. This didn't stop them from investigating Danny and that brat wont stop spouting his opinion.
"I don't know what he sees in you. Aside from appearance, there isn't much to like." Damian grumbled.
"He must be really vain then because Tim doesn't deserve this kid." Jason responded.
"But if he even thinks about hurting Drake-"
"Yeah, we bury him."
Tim has chosen to ignore everything they say.
The last issue is Phantom.
Tim doesn't like Phantom.
The spirit had been hanging around Gotham for a while now. He lingered around the corners of the city and if he felt like it he'd interfere. In his own words, Phantom said that he dealt with the dead, not the living. Tim did some research and it's said Phantom showed up near the dying or dead as a sort of shepherd to souls. He made the transition easier for them.
So when Phantom was seem lingering around Danny he couldn't accept it. He'd be damned if he let some spooky bastard take Danny. He can't have him.
So Tim decided to invite Danny to stay with him for a few days. But a few day became a week became two weeks. Don't judge. This was just so Tim could look out for Phantom and prevent Danny from dying. It hasn't been working so far since Phantom hasn't been seen nearby.
But Tim did run into him.
"Why are you stalking Danny Nightingale?" Tim damanded.
Phantom circled overhead his spectral tail curling. His translucent body phasing in and out of the visible light spectrum.
"Stalking? I don't know what you're talking about. I don't care about chasing the living. But let's say Nightingale is an exception. He's special. But what does he have to do with you?" Phantom eyes Tim suspiciously before diving down floated inches away from Tim face. "Hmmm, I always did think you were the cutest Robin. I was right. Too bad I've got my eyes on someone else now."
And like that he dissappeared.
Now Tim was even more anxious. Phantom was definitely after Danny most likely dead or alive. If something happened to Danny he didn't know what he'd do. Its not safe out there with Phantom hanging around.
Danny was still awake when Tim returned home. He was watching some detective drama he had refused to watch with Tim because he kept guessing the plot during the first few minutes. Which was fair.
"You were out late again. Would it kill you to get some sleep now and then?" Danny sighed stretching.
Tim wanted to say "Actually I think it would. Lets not test it" and banter like always. Maybe even relax and let Danny talk about where show was on.
But Tim couldn't. Not when everything felt so surreal. Danny was just oblivious to the dangerous spirit trying to take his soul and Tim couldn't protect him.
Tim couldn't believe he was thinking this but what if Danny wanted to be with Phantom? Then what?
Tim knew that his emotions were his greatest weakness. When he did control them he does a lot of self-destructive things and he ends up hurting people especially when he's hurt.
He hugged Danny, burying his face in his shoulder.
"Danny can you promise me...that you'll stay here." He didn't care if Danny wanted to be with Phantom just as long as he doesn't leave this world and stop being his light.
The thought of not seeing Danny every day killed him. No more nagging him to eat and drink. No more star gazing. No more TV marathons. No more being dragged to spontaneous trips to the crafts stores. No more hearing the insane conversations with his friends. No more waking up on the couch with a pair of blue-green eyes looking up at him. No more Danny.
Tim felt like his heart was stopping and his stomach dropped.
Danny hugged him back putting a soothing hand on the back of Tim's neck. It was cool to the touch.
"Of course, I'll stay." Danny laughed as if the very notion he'd leave was ridiculous.
Tim's brain seemed to twist in on itself as the cascade of emotions overflowed. That laugh seemed to play over and over in his head echoing non-stop. Warmth bloomed in his chest. Dread, uncertainty, hope, and affection all blended.
Oh no..
Tim was in love.
(This got way too long. I'm not really good a romance as you can tell but I'm trying. Anyway this is a Danny fell first but Tim fell harder situation.)
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housederiva · 6 days ago
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Here's every version of the letter the Inquisitor gets from their LI plus Varric (which didn't make me cry at all)
If your Inky didn't romance anyone:
Inquisitor, Greetings from miserable, rainy Minrathous! (Don't tell Dorian I called it that.) The rotten weather here is making me nostalgic for Skyhold. The mountains were freezing, but at least the air didn't smell like wet garbage. We'll have to get in another game of Wicked Grace, soon. Harding picked up the trail again. I'd tell you not to worry, but I know how useless that is. Instead, I'll just say: I've got a great team on this. Neve could stare down the Maker, and wait until you meet Rook. He's/She's/They're a natural: Smart, resourceful, completely unpredictable. You'd like him/her/them, as long as you don't try to beat him/her/them at cards. Chuckles'll never know what hit him. I'll write again once we have something solid for you. Drinks at the Hanged Man are on me when this is over. Take care of yourself. Varric
Blackwall:
My love, You have summoned me to Minrathous, and I will answer your call, as soon as responsibilities here in the South allow. I have missed being by your side. Will these troubles be the last we face? The world seems always to conspire, through duty or disaster, to pull you away from me. I do not resent it. You are dedicated to purposes far larger and more significant than myself. I hope you do not think me a fool for hoping that one day, your only concern will be the color you wish our walls to be painted, or the flowers we will plant beside our gate. I'm partial to carnations. Yours always, Thom
Cassandra:
My love, We are no strangers to duty, or the separation it demands of us. You head for Tevinter, and though I want to go with you, there is work we both must do. I will not falter in the tasks that wait before me and I pray my actions, in whatever measure they can, will keep you safe. The others see only confidence in my resolve, but you have always known more than mere appearance. I confess to you, and you alone, that I am afraid. I'm afraid of what may happen, that Thedas will face such turmoil as it did before. I know not what awaits us. Yet even in the face of uncertainty, there are two things I cannot doubt and never will. The first is that our paths are never separated long. That I will find you at my side when I need you, as you will find me at yours. I will play my part in this and follow as soon as I can. The second thing I never doubt is you. Whatever lies before you, trust yourself. Trust your heart as I trust it. It will not lead you astray. Yours, Cassandra
Cullen:
The top of the letter has been punctured by small, sharp teeth, leaving most of a beloved name and a few sentences chewed to read. I fear the puppy started on this letter shortly after I did. I'd start over, but I must send this tonight if it's to reach you. Matters are settled here and I make for Tevinter as soon as possible. I almost believed chaos might spare us this time. I can't say I wished to see Minrathous before now, but I am eager to see you. I long to see your face and know that you are all right. You are I've There's I wish I was better at putting into writing all that's in my mind. For now, simply know that I love you. It is the most cherished constant of my life. The days ahead will not be easy. I know there's much you carry, more than many realize. But whatever you must face, you will not meet it alone. You have my sword, my counsel, my - I could write this list forever when all I mean to say is this - Whatever you need of me, I am yours. Cullen
Dorian:
Amatus, I'm writing. Again. Yes, the sending crystals still work and yes, you'll be in Minrathous in a few short weeks. But a letter, written in blind longing, is real. It can be touched, and it can be held, when ink and paper must substitute for your skin on mine and my breath in your ear. I used to scoff at frequent declarations of affection. Trite, I thought. Save them for rare and precious moments. But time and love are no longer things I care to squander, especially not as we race again toward calamity. And so, in each of these fleeting, ephemeral seconds, I will tell you that I love you. Whether penned or spoken, or conveyed by glance or action, I love you. In this moment, and in all the moments to come, for as long as they do, I love you. I will find you soon. Yours, Dorian
Iron Bull
Hey, Kadan, Not the first time we've marched toward different battles. I know you're keeping the crap from catching fire up in Tevinter. Wish I could be there, but I'll make sure there's a world for you to come back to when you're done dealing with crazy vints and stupid Antaam and whatever other crap Solas kicked up. (Shit, the Antaam. Remember when I was worried what would happen if I went tal-vashoth? That right there!) I know you're gonna be careful, and you've got Morrigan there. Just take care of yourself. If anything happens to you, I'm going to have to take Krem and the Chargers and stomp across all of Tevinter to come get you. It'll be a whole thing, and you know it'll upset Dorian. Being apart from you made me realize something else. I spent so long being whatever the Ben-Hassrath wanted me to be. An investigator. An agent. A mercenary sending reports. These past years, since the Inquisition ended, I've been able to just be what I want to be. And what I really want to be is yours. I like the person I am when I'm with you. So come back safe. Love, The signature appears to be a stylized rendering of the Iron Bull's head.
Josephine:
My Dearest Lord/Lady, I have spoken to friends in Minrathous. They offer us their hospitality, not to mention shelter from the worst intrigues of the Archon's Palace. While you're well acquainted with the roving eyes of grand courts, please take care. Tevinter's regard can be the oldest and cruelest of them all. The family writes the weather back home is beautiful. I do miss our quiet times together. There is a question I've wanted to ask you for so long. I would like to pretend I have been busy, or it was not the proper time. But, if I am being honest, I only waited because I have been afraid of choosing a poor moment. Please, let me make a promise to you here. When we return to Antiva, I will ask you, on the steps of the estate, if you will do me a great honor. And I dream you will say yes. Always yours, Josephine Postscript: I cannot believe it nearly slipped my mind. Yvette and Lord Otranto send their best wishes, and hope to see us back home in time to welcome their third child.
Sera:
(An artistically doodled journal page presumably from the Inquisitor's partner, Sera.) Keep this as close as I need you. (A drawing of a pile of flowers, with lines like it's moving, an arrow pointing to it labeled "us.") - North again, Mini-wrathus still stuck up its own pucker. - Magiturds are scared of us. They don't even know. - We work with Maevaris, right? She's wow. - So many Friends! Jennies in all the walls! - We kill him this time. He took from us twice! (A drawing of a cracked egg scribbled out, with "can't even joke" in letters that tore the page.) - Still thinking of you sideways. - Never mind the Dalish, here's the Veil Jumpers! Tempest-kin! (A drawing of a tall, shorthaired elf (Sera?) and Irelin brandishing two fingers, backflipping as a tree explodes in runes.) - The memory thing makes my head spin. If that Rook doesn't take it, throw it out. - Tell Morrigan ppbbth! for me. - I'll also tell her ppbbth! She knows why. - Tell them to Stripe. Him. Up. I wanted more books. (More heavy scribbles that tear.) - You meet; I'll keep you safe. Then I'm your time off, and you're my time on. (The last section has different colored inks, like Sera has returned to it several times.) New naked names: -Sweet-tits (scribbled out) -Bestest (scribbled out) -Loverly (scribbled out) -Lovey (scribbled out) -My-for-always-and-ever - name's not too long, time's too short. -But "Sweet-tits," though (scribbled out)
Solas:
Vhenan, I do not know if you will see these words. My ritual is ready and will soon be set in motion. Perhaps when you read this the world will be as it once was, and you will see why all I did was necessary. I cannot ask your forgiveness, but I hope you come to understand. That night in Crestwood, when I shared the truth about your vallaslin... you do not know how close I came to breaking. I could have shared the truth, or even put my plans aside and simply stayed with you as Solas... as I wanted. I regret the pain I caused you. What I feel for you will never change. The note is unsigned, but the handwriting is Solas'.
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inkskinned · 1 year ago
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it is the first snow today. i think we should all have off work, even though it didn't stick. i think there should be 4 national holidays, one for each season. happy first snow, go home and make cookies. for spring it can be the first crocus. for summer the first lightning bug. for autumn, the first golden leaf. go home, kiss your dog, feed your cat (who is absolutely already-fed but somehow still starving.)
i think we should all take more showers together, but i mean that in the soft way. i mean it like taking a nap. two years ago i had 5 adult friends in my queen bed, all of us laying across each other, head over belly over thigh over hand. any time one of us would giggle, it would ripple over each of us, like pulling on a spiderweb. kim actually needed to nap and didn't get to sleep and i am still sorry for it even though this is one of my most precious memories.
i think we should all wash each other's hair, i mean. i walk my dog and i watch someone put up twinkle lights around their front porch. alex and i just moved, and i love the neighborhood. already so many of our new neighbors have stopped by to say hello. the nice lady downstairs also collects plants, like me. she gave us her number on a pink post-it note. i am trying to decide whether to make her cookies or brownies.
i am going through a very hard time. something bad happened this weekend that i do not wish to discuss. it is hanging over me. i think of the green ribbon, and the woman who had her throat cut. it feels like that sometimes, inside of my body. like i am walking and talking despite being half-corpsed. like i am hanging on by a ribbon, standing on some kind of cusp. i keep saying - at least it wasn't worse. we are so lucky it wasn't worse. the idea is river-rock smooth now, all the edges worried off.
in this very dark night - the sun sets by 3 now - people don't need to, but they try anyway. they paint the missing light into things. i have an embarrassing number of missed calls and texts, but i feel the love from them nevertheless - hey. if you need something, i'm here. i will bring you food/puzzles/anything. i got you.
i think we should all have a big group chat where we do errands with strangers. this week i got lost in a home depot, which is wild because i'm a lesbian and we are actually hatched in a lowe's lumber section. there were two other women in the whole store. we ended up shopping together, at first by accident (we all needed things in the same aisle), and then because, well, why not. one of the ladies was taller than me, so she pulled down the screws i needed. i am agile and have the personality of a raccoon, so they sent me after anything below 3 feet. we talked about holiday plans and never learned each other's names, but did learn all the drama about each other's families.
i am making you cupcakes, because i have so much affection i want to pour it into batter. you ask me if i am eating enough per meal. i wrap your gift twice, trying to do it prettily. i get excited to give it to you, just because i hope you'll be excited too.
my parents drive an hour just to see the new apartment and to do the parent thing; standing in the kitchen saying things like "oh you'll get so much use from this dishwasher" and "well, you could paint that" and "when your mother and i moved it was uphill both ways and in a snowstorm and of course your brother was an infant." my mother brought me a plant for housewarming. i always say i love you before she leaves.
i play dnd on tuesdays still, after all these years. we all keep that night free. at one point, between grad school and marriage and all of it, we had to have a serious discussion about how to keep it running. we will keep going, we decided eventually. just to see each other, even if we don't play - you are all important to me. sebastian is not prone to affection but last night he stole my usual sign off - i love you all, be good, he said. he was laughing.
i don't love the winter, actually. i like snow in theory, but i grew up in the north, and am too-familiar with the season of "mud and sludge". i don't like being cold. but i do love something kind of soft and rare: every year around this time, people remember oh yes. you and i are human together. and i have love to spare.
it is the first snow, and something in my heart is finally warm again. i have spent what felt like the last 18 months just going-through-the-motions. it has felt blank and immediate, like i would never actually feel again. that sounds extremely trite and stupid - but that is the boring and familiar experience of depression. life just washes up against your windows, and you watch it happening. you see things that should be lovely and affecting, and it just whispers too-thin. i was desperately uncreative. uninterested in my hobbies. unimpressed by my writing. i told my therapist, often, i don't know how to find hope again.
almost sheepishly, something strange and lovely is burning in my chest. i keep not-looking at it, worried it will scamper back into the shadows again. it is skittish and wild, but it is so warm i want to sink my hands into its fur and feel it breathing. i love-hate it: if it's real, it can hurt me when it leaves again. but i am icarus-born, sun-lover and poet: i can't help myself. despite my best intentions, i am falling in love with life again.
i am planning to make cookies for my friends. alex and i are going to go christmas tree shopping. we picked out matching dish towels last night, and they have little mushrooms on them.
i love you. it does come back. yes, even after a long time. even for you. i promise. keep trying. you will wake up and it will be a day you can smile about.
write me when you get there. we will take the day off of work, and i will wash your hair, and we will both be laughing.
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couldeatthatgirlforlunch · 3 months ago
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I really loved your scenario of The Justice League AND The Ill reader,Lmao, poor reader they only need a rest.
Anyway, ever since I read the first part I was thinking about the kids, you know, the League Sidekicks, obviously The Reader knows them, due to work (I can really imagine Batman introducing His kids to the Reader to force a bond , And obviously The rest of The League does the same) So I had the headcanon that the reader really likes the children, they talk to them after missions, sometimes they buy them some gifts for their birthdays, they listen to them when they complain about their father figures (Therapist Reader), etc. But at the same time I can imagine The Reader being totally uncomfortable with his parents, so I can't help but think of a scenario in which The Reader is talking to the League kids in a good mood, but the League members walk in. to the room (They obviously saw the Happy Reader, so they want to gain some advantage) And The Reader just turns off, goes into business mode and is curt as always with the league, and when he finishes talking to the league, he goes back to talking to the children and their mood is happy again. Man I would love to see the league's reaction to the obvious reader favoritism
PD:I really love your work, you are amazing
Pd2:If The kids are yandere, ITS UP to you
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A Week in Life: Take Your Kid to Work Day
Synopsis: A week in your life where you get a lot of new little friends, even if you know something’s sketchy about it.
Pairing: Yandere!Justice League X Assistant!Gn!Reader; Platonic!Yanderes! Robin (Dick), Superboy (Konner), Miss Martian, Kid Flash (Wally) and Aqualad (Kaldur'ahm)
Tw: A single implication about Hal’s past dub/non con incidente (blink and you miss it); Implied emotional manipulation, I guess? Justice League using kids as a manipulation tactic; A little angst, I think we all hate how Superman treated Conner, so I added that, so technically not a healthy relationship between them here, could be interpreted as Superman manipulating him or Superboy trying too hard to make his bio-dad like him; The kid’s ages are definitely not accurate canon wise, but what is canon anyway? I mixed their personalities and origins from Young Justice (along with their age gap) and for Superboy it was mainly the animated movie Reign of the Supermen; English is not my 1st language.
Word count: 3,3k
Requested? More than once.
Extra notes: Dick is 10, Kaldur'ahm, Conner, Megan and Wally are 13. I wish I knew more about the Wonder Girls to write about one of them, I felt bad for not adding them, but I would’ve felt worse writing for a character I have no idea how to write.
General masterlist | A Day in Life - Series masterlist
— I wasn't aware that there was a Take Your Kid to Work Day on schedule... — You said in a surprised, maybe taken aback, tone, if not a little strangled and sarcastic, even if a little happy. You rubbed your forehead, you knew your hunch was right…
Monday…
You’ve heard the rumors Gotham media was spreading for months now, you even asked Batman if you should prepare the marketing team in case of an emergency, he denied everything.
So why was it that now you were staring at a 10 year old dressed as a traffic light?
— Miss/Mister/Mx (Y/N)... I’m hungry… — Worst of all? The kid was cute.
You smile in a friendly manner.
— Okay, okay. Just give me a second, buddy, I need to talk to your… Dad…?! — You just now realized you didn't know their actual relationship. Batman only told you his name was Robin, that he was his partner, and that he was in the watchtower to observe. You didn't know superheroes accepted 10 year old interns, but whatever. The kid just stared blankly at you, not giving an actual answer to if you got your assumption right.
— Can I go with you? — Robin fiddled with his fingers. So cute. You nodded with a small smile. The kid jumped off his too big chair and ran towards you, surprising you by taking your hand. He had small hands. So cute.
You walked slowly, to accommodate to his height, in the direction of the door to the briefing room, where Batman was talking to John Stewart. This other Green Lantern was a breath of fresh air. The other one (the one who shouldn't be named) was away, working on another district of the universe since that whole… Less-than-consensual situation. You were happy and surprised when the League didn't just brush it off, and even compensated you for it, alongside making him go away. He either agreed to that, or caused the 3rd World War against the Justice League. It was a temporary predicament, but happier nonetheless, since John wasn't obsessed with you, unlike the rest of them, and easy to work with.
You cleared your throat so they would turn to you.
— Does Robin have any restrictions? He said he's hungry so I'm gonna take him to the kitchen. — You said politely. Batman shook his head.
— Just don't give him sugar. He needs to sleep before patrol tonight. — You raised your eyebrows in surprise and nodded your head. Batman looked at the boy. — Behave, chum. — You blinked, Robin nodded solemnly.
As you walked in the direction of the kitchen, the kid showed to be very happy and talkative. You were surprised, considering who his dad was, but it warmed your heart. At least it seemed he wasn't mistreated.
At some point, he let your hand go and started cartwheeling and doing acrobatics all the way there to show off his abilities to you. You gasped and clapped, praising his talent along with other workers from the crew who were passing the hall. You were slightly worried that he would fall and get hurt, but the kid was really confident in what he was doing (but they always are, until they fall).
When you got there, you were impressed that he wasn't even the slightest out of breath.
— Do you have games on your phone? — He asked, sitting down on a table while you rummaged the fridge for some sandwiches or any healthy snack, since you didn't know how his home diet was, but guessing by his build, which was a lot more athletic than kids his age are, he was probably pretty healthy. Son of the Bat.
— Hmm, I have Dress to Impress, Pou and Candy Crush.
— What is Pou? — Your heart panged and you sighed, feeling old.
— When were you born? 2010? — You walked towards him and settled a plate with a sandwich in front of him, before pouring a cup of juice.
— 2014. — Your mouth dropped, speechless. — Wait, so not even Stardew Valley? — You cleared your throat and shook your head, sitting beside him, while he started eating.
— Wait, can I even let you play? Does Batman let you have screen time? — He nodded.
— I have a phone. I just couldn't bring it with me today… He said he would show me around the tower, but he got busy with work… — He deflated a little at the end of the sentence, your heart broke. — Anyway… He told me I could distract myself. I just need your permission. — You bite your lip.
— Okay. How about we go to the recreational room and you can play some videogames while I work from the computer. — Robin nodded eagerly.
— Damn, you can't even play with me? Working sucks. That must be why adults are so boring. — You took a napkin and cleaned some food from his cheek.
— It's not that bad… You can do whatever you want. — He perked up.
— I guess so… — He looked you up and down. You prepared yourself for one of those moments where kids are so blunt that they don't know they could offend someone. — But you're not boring, (Y/N), you're cool. Must be why daddy likes you so much. And he doesn't like no one.
Tuesday…
Wow, what a weird coincidence. Just yesterday Batman brought his kid, and now Martian Manhunter brought his niece.
Miss Martian looked older than Robin, but again, she was a martian, her appearance was shifted to whatever she wanted to look like. All you knew was that she was young and new on Earth.
Right now, she looked very human. She had freckles and auburn hair. The only thing that made her stand out was the green of her skin.
When she presented herself to you, you got startled by her voice in your head, but you and Martian Manhunter softly explained to her that on Earth people didn't communicate through their minds, and it was kinda like an invasion of privacy. Kinda funny hearing him say that, but whatever.
Like Batman the day prior, Martian trusted the girl in your hands. So many coincidences, right?!
— So, honey, how old are you?
— Oh, on my home planet I should be about 39. But converting to Earth years, I’m 13. — She said with a shy but friendly smile, you smiled back.
— You’re pretty young then. How are you settling on Earth? Planning to go to school maybe? — She nodded.
— I just started the school year… I wasn't too sure about that, but my uncle said it would be good to learn human behaviors. — You nodded.
— American school is nice, I recommend you should take part in clubs. And don't feel pressured to make a billion friends. It's better to have one good friend, instead of 10 people you know but can't rely on. — She nodded, biting her lip.
— I already know some of the other sidekicks, I just don't have any civilian friends… I was thinking about joining the cheerleading team. — You gasped, excited.
— Oh, that's really good! I always wanted to join, but was never the sporty type. You’re sweet, I think that already gives you some points. — Her green cheeks got darker.
— You think so?! — Her voice got louder with excitement.
— Of course! Now let me give you some tips about the jocks, honey…
Wednesday…
Today, Flash brought Kid Flash. You haven't met him until now. The sequence of days the older heroes brought in their sidekicks was starting to look weird… But not that weird. Batman said he would give Robin a tour but became unavailable. Manhunter wanted Miss Martian to meet civilian people and have a good role model — you don't know why he decided that that role model should be you, but it made sense, so… —. Flash Said they would spend the day using the lab to experiment some more on Kid Flash’s still recently acquired powers. So. Coincidences, right?
The boy was 13 too, he had messy red hair and green eyes. Flash didn't specify their relationship, but their personalities definitely matched a little. Both a little hyperiperactive and smiley. Although that could be more of a speedster thing, especially the first part.
Like promised, they spent half that day on the lab, occasionally calling you for snack breaks. However, at some point, Flash gave an excuse and left you with the kid.
Huh.
— Sooo, what do you do around here? — Kid Flash asked, spinning around in a chair he found somewhere and rolled to the middle of your office in the blink of an eye. You half-smiled. It was nice not being crowded by those weirdos and being around fresh and youthful people, but it was starting to feel weird.
— I plan schedule appointments, organize team meetings, prepare agendas and itineraries, book meals and travel arrangements, handle record keeping and documentation, and make sure a project stays on budget. — The ginger blinked and stopped spinning.
— Uhh, you went to college for that? — You blinked.
— I did, why? — He chuckled slightly.
— Nothing, it's cool, sounds boring, though. — You nodded.
— What do you want to work with? — He looked to the side, thoughtful for a moment.
— I think I want to be a scientist.
— Oh really?
— Yeah, I like physics, mechanics and a little bit of chemistry. — You smirked.
— Chemistry? Sounds boring. — Kidflash froze for a second, wide-eyed, then relaxed and started laughing loudly. His chuckling prompted you to chuckle alongside him.
He used his feet to push the chair around your table and stopped at your side.
— Hey, can I see how much people get paid here? If I'm gonna be a member of the League one day, might as well optimize time and just work here. — You slapped his hands away when he reached for your computer, he pouted.
— Wouldn't that make it difficult to keep your secret identity hidden?! — Kid Flash stretched his arm, then draped it across your shoulders, you lifted an eyebrow.
— Babe. I'm a superhero. I could change clothes really fast right now and you wouldn't even notice. — You scoffed and lightly pushed him and his chair away.
— A phone booth would be more appropriate for that.
— What's a phone booth?
Thursday…
Superman brought Superboy.
Why the fuck are they doing that, bro?
You didn't even know they were close! Sure, Superboy is Superman and Lex Luthor’s clone, the whole world knew that, and that Superboy took to Superman's side. But they were never seen together, unlike Flash and Kid Flash, or Batman and Robin, for example.
Worst of all? It looked like the mood between them was… Weary. Especially on Superman’s part. Did he not trust Superboy? You could understand that… But look at his puppy sad face!
And not even five minutes later, Superman just flew away, saying something about a hurricane in Texas, AND SUPERBOY STAYED!
The silence was awkward for a few seconds. You thought back to the personality he showed when he was first announced by LexCorp, when Superman was considered dead. He was all over the media (Lex’s marketing team was good) with his charisma and flirty personality. Although he kept the leather jacket, his quietness surprised you.
You cleared your throat.
Superman brought Superboy.
Why the fuck are they doing that, bro?
You didn't even know they were close! Sure, Superboy is Superman and Lex Luthor’s clone, the whole world knew that, and that Superboy took to Superman's side. But they were never seen together, unlike Flash and Kid Flash, or Batman and Robin, for example.
Worst of all? It looked like the mood between them was… Weary. Especially on Superman’s part. Did he not trust Superboy? You could understand that… But look at his puppy sad face!
And not even five minutes later, Superman just flew away, saying something about a hurricane in Texas, AND SUPERBOY STAYED!
The silence was awkward for a few seconds. You thought back to the personality he showed when he was first announced by LexCorp, when Superman was considered dead. He was all over the media (Lex’s marketing team was good) with his charisma and flirty personality. Although he kept the leather jacket, his quietness surprised you.
You cleared your throat.
— So… Are you hungry? Wanna play videogames? — You grimaced slightly. He looked at you again, a little hesitant.
— Uh… I think so? — He blinked. — You guys have videogames here?! — He exclaimed, surprised. You chuckled.
— Oh yeah, for such a serious and stern guy, Batman really invested in the work environment. — You chuckled together, walking towards the recreational area.
You were curious about the earlier weird vibe, but didn't want to prod.
At first, you just let the boy play by himself, just sitting beside him and working while talking, that was until he paused the game between missions and stretched, then looked at you.
— Are you guys involved? — You looked at him with your eyebrows raised.
— You guys…? — He pursed his lips.
— You and Superman. — You grimaced slightly.
— Oh no, he's my boss, and not my type at all. — He nodded, looking pensive.
— He likes you. — You kept a blank expression, waiting for him to continue. — I like you too, so I can imagine why he likes you. — You stared at him, exasperated. He widened his eyes. — Not like that! — He raised his hands to deny. — It's just- I feel comfortable with you. I felt comfortable with some of his friends before, I didn't even know why, but I think it's because half of me is from him. Like I have some things from Lex since I was… Born… — He looked to the ground for a second, pouting lightly. — That's why Superman doesn't like me. — You widened your eyes.
— I'm sure he likes you! — Superboy looked at you like he didn't believe you.
— No, it's okay… He's polite, I guess. And took me in as his family, just not… As his son… More like a brother, or… A cousin… I mean, I can understand, I'm basically a hate baby, created by his biggest enemy to outdo and destroy him… — You shook your head.
You didn't know what to say, since you didn't know how their dynamic was like.
— H-He brought you here to spend time with you, didn't he? He just had an emergency to take care of… — He looked to the ground and then at you again. He didn't have the heart to tell you that's the first time they ever “hung out”, and that his genius brain clocked hours ago that Superman's plan was to create a connection between you both by orchestrating a connection with you and him. He also didn't want to bad mouth Clark. A part of him always would have hope that Superman would want to be closer to him one day.
Superboy looked at the clock and then at you.
— Don't you have a break? I can hear your stomach, I'm hungry too.
Friday…
This madness has to stop now.
— Nice to meet you, Aqualad. — You nodded at the boy with a small smile. You were a little mesmerized by his exotic appearance. He had brown skin, blonde hair in braids (where are his roots?) and blue eyes. His arms were also covered in tattoos that you knew had something to do with his abilities.
— I was showing him around the Watchtower, but now I have a meeting with Wonder Woman, why don't you two hang out for a while? — Aquaman, always the most obnoxious one. Their intentions were 100% clear now.
Aquaman didn't let you say anything else and left the room with said hero. You heard her murmur something about having to find her own apprentice to bring to the watchtower as soon as possible.
You looked at the boy, not knowing what to say.
— Have you ever been to Atlantis? — He surprised you by speaking first, his tone was gentle, if not a little monotonous, but he looked at you with interest.
— Uhhh, no? I’m not that good of a swimmer and I can't breathe underwater. — Aqualad smirked lightly.
— You wouldn't need to worry about breathing, there are multiple ways for humans to do that, from magic to technology. As for swimming… I'm sure we can find some sort of solution for that, also. And I doubt my king would be opposed to the idea of teaching you. — You nodded slowly. So much for subtly.
— … My vitamin D is low enough as it is, I’d rather stay on land, no offense. — The atlantean opened his mouth to speak but you beat him to it. — Aqualad! Do you like the food here? I've always been curious about your culture’s cuisine…
You kept talking for hours, eventually, Aqualad and you ended up in the training room, he offered to show you a little of his control over water bodies, and you, still a little fascinated over the convivence with superheroes, and this being the second time you met someone from Atlantis, accepted eagerly.
— This is just like H2O… — Kauldur’ahm blinked.
— It is water… — The boy confirmed, hesitantly. You laughed.
— No, no, not water. It's a TV show, it's about mermaids. I guess it isn't exactly accurate, but they can control water, just like you! — He nodded, slowly, contemplating. You looked at your watch, noticing your lunch time was due. You looked at him, shyly. — If you're up for it, we could watch it now… — That seemed to make him perk up a little and he nodded quickly.
— I would like to.
Monday…
— I wasn't aware that there was a Take Your Kid to Work Day on schedule... — You said in a surprised, maybe taken aback, tone, if not a little strangled and sarcastic, even if a little happy. You rubbed your forehead, you knew your hunch was right…
There they were, in the meeting room, all seated around the big roundtable, almost double the number of people who usually sit there.
Now, the food order they made, made sense.
You pushed the food cart forward, one for Flash. You came back and pushed another one, this one for Kid Flash, you ruffled his hair. Then, you walked back and pushed the 3rd food cart around the table, delivering each meal for each hero.
— Steak for Green Lantern. One black coffee for Batman. One meat sandwich and chocolate milk for Robin. — You squeezed his cheek. He smiled brightly at you. — Toast for Martian Manhunter and a slice of strawberry cake for Missy Miss Martian. — As you put the plate in front of her, you whispered that you wanted to know how the cheerleading team was going. She nodded happily. — A burger with fries for Aquaman, a smoothie and salad for Aqualad. Oh, did you change your hair? I like it! — You smiled brightly at the boy and his cheeks burned, he nodded. — Ice cream for Wonder Woman. Another burger and fries for Superman and another for Superboy. I see you followed my advice, your style really matches with those piercings. Tell me how you did it later. — You laughed carelessly and went to the door. — Need me for something more? — Your bosses shook their heads, stunned. You left and closed the door.
— Can't believe you guys actually did it… — John shook his head, disappointed at his teammates.
— I knew it would work. — Batman said, sipping from his drink.
— That's why we stole your idea when we knew about it. — Aquaman chuckled.
— I really need to find a sidekick. — Diana huffed.
Batman turned to Robin.
— You did a good job, chum. — Dick chuckled.
— Yeah, I even asked for a sandwich without the crust. Now (Y/N) think I'm the cutest here. — He smirked smugly. Wally scoffed.
— Yeah, right. She totally doesn't think you're an annoying kid. — The duo stared at each other. — I, for example, made them laugh. — The redhead puffed his chest proudly.
— Are you sure it wasn’t a pity laugh?! — Superboy snorted at Robin’s retort.
— Although Robin might be physically more adorable, and Kid Flash, in his words, made them laugh. (Y/N) and I started a TV show together, my king. — Aquaman nodded at his apprentice’s words.
— You did a good job.
— But (Y/N) actually said they wanted to talk to me later! That usually oficializes human’s friendships! — Megan said, softly.
— They said the same to me, the other day. That I could talk to them whenever I wanted… — Superman looked at Superboy, surprised. He felt awkward praising him, so he just nodded his head and looked away. Superboy pouted slightly.
— Because you told them your sob story, now they think you're a loser. — Conner glared at Dick. — Their physical language showed that they loved me, B! I honestly deserve an Oscar after that performance! They're gonna be ours before you suckers know it!
As a screaming match raised inside the room, the adult heroes looked at each other, lost for words, not only had the kids gotten you roped a bazillion times faster then they could ever dream, but also you were so amazing that they were enamored with you too.
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yeahxsurexokay13 · 7 months ago
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ideal weekend, lando norris
summary: while fans stress about the fact that, following their breakup, the actress won't be there to witness the driver's first ever f1 win, y/n gets asked about her ideal weekend off in an interview and accidentally manifests it [actress!reader]
warnings: i think only very bad editing (i tried) and me bringing up yet another footballer i feel affection for for literally no reason
fc: madelyn cline
started this as something completely different from what it ended up being but i think i like it. i'd love it if you let me know what you think tho (((:
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y/n.y/l
📍miami
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Liked by rudeth and 1.059.326 others
y/n.y/l yet another victim of a @/maxverstappen1 win. had so much fun but i think i'll just stick to acting 🙃🙃🫠 thank you @/redbullracing for having me!!! <333
view all 2.071 comments
username at a red bull event? what happened to once a mclaren girl always a mclaren girl????
username this event was basically work for her ?? you ppl need to stop taking everything so personally omg
username professional SUPER FAST driver, part time actress ❤️ by author
username you're in miami the same week of the miami gp. coincidence? i think not 😌😌
username GORGEOUS GORGEOUS GIRL
redbullracing Glad you had fun Y/n! Maybe we should start considering you for a guest appearance in our garage 😉
mclaren Thanks for the offer, Red Bull! But we've already got dibs on her 😉
username UM I HOPE THIS ISN'T A JOKE ??
username don't play with me like this admin!!
mclaren Don't worry. We won't hold this against you 🧡
y/n.y/l ily guys 🧡🧡🧡
username Ok cool now go finish season 4
username Why are u in Miami shouldn’t u be filming obx 4 😪
y/n.y/l side quest
username not the Y/n x F1 content I was hoping for but at this point I'll take what I can get
maxverstappen1 Next time I'll give you a head start. Enjoyed having you with us, Y/n 🫶
y/n.y/l there will definitely not be a next time but thanks tho!!!👍🏼 always a pleasure seeing you ❤️
username pretty 🩷
username Why is Max literally this🧍🏼‍♂️❤️ by author
landonorris Um what's this?
y/n.y/l 😶 not what it looks like
username seeing you two banter like this makes my heart ache 💔
username i'm never moving on from y/nlando sigh
username OBX S4 WHEN QUEEN
29 April 2024
mclaren added to their story
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Liked by maxfewtrell and 1.890.345 others
y/n.y/l me and FORMULA 1 RACE WINNER lando norris
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username JUST WHEN I THOUGHT TODAY COULDN'T GET ANY BETTER OMFG
username formula 1 race winner lando norris has a nice ring to it 😉 ❤️ by author
username What a race, and what a win for Lando!!!
username IM LOSING IT YALL I JUST CHECKED OUT OF CURIOSITY AND BRIGHTON ALSO WON TODAY Y/N MANIFESTED HER IDEAL SUNDAY
username minus the relaxing part lol i know for a fact bestie was stressing in that garage
carlossainz55 It's great to see you back at a race! Missed having you around! ❤️
y/n.y/l thank you carlitos ❤️ wish i could've got to see you up there with lando
charles_leclerc ouch ? 🫤
y/n.y/l noooo, i didn't mean you!!! x
maxverstappen1 ouch?
y/n.y/l i did mean you. sorry /:
username are we back in 2022 and i didn't realise?????? not complaining at all tho
mclaren You and FORMULA 1 RACE WINNER Lando Norris look amazing! 🧡 ❤️ by author
username admin definitely ships
username children of divorce rise !!!!!!! ❤️ by author
username u think u're so funny liking this @.y/n.y/n but we're actually hurting we want our mum back!!!
username seeing you celebrate with lando was everything 🥹🥹🥹
username when i tell you i sCREAMED !!!!!!
username Everything in the world has been healed due to this post
oscarpiastri Awesome that you could come watch. Missed you ❤️
y/n.y/l missed you more pastry boy ❤️❤️
username we were robbed from this friendship !!!😪
username can't believe how emotional I am seeing you two together at his big win
francisca.cgomes ❤️❤️❤️ ❤️ by author
username just realised i am not as over y/nlando as i thought i was. in fact i am not over y/nlando at all.
username well seeing you with FORMULA 1 RACE WINNER Lando Norris just hit me right in the feels💔
landonorris Thanks for being there to share the moment with us ❤️ ❤️ by author
landonorris Also I think after this you might now have to come to every race ever
y/n.y/l clearing my schedule as we speak 🫡
username i am so ready to be delusional
05 May 2024
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