#why won’t you just let me die
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I don’t want to walk on fucking eggshells every time I have to eat with my family but no matter what I do they’re always gonna judge me for it :/
#“you have to be strong if you wanna survive in this country” well guess what I’m weak and I don’t want to survive#why won’t you just let me die#I can only name like 3 reasons as to why I should live and over 30 as to why I shouldn’t#you also need to learn to keep things to yourself around people that don’t like being picked apart regardless of if they’re related or not#in other words leave me alone and don’t make comments on me every five seconds when I’m eating and don’t even want to be around you
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Hey. Sorry about the inactivity, but pretty sure no one cared that much anyways lol. Been a looooong time since I kept that distant from Tumblr…at least now I know I’m able to survive without checking posts every day/being chronically online! I’ve got an intense love-hate relationship with this lifestyle I’ve dug myself into. Think I’m getting a little bit better with the balance even if school isn’t really giving me an option. Got a load of work I need to keep catching up on if I don’t want to disappoint my professors. We’ll survive somehow. Here take a quick batch of Puzzle doodles k bye
#the hell am I so anxious about? maybe it’s just overstimulation stuff#hoping it’ll die down because I can’t keep enjoying myself when I’m like this#seriously is starting to mess with my flight responses over the tiniest things#like yea obviously I needed to stay logged out of Tumblr so I would focus more on schoolwork#but uhhhh gonna be transparent and say a huge part of it is the jolts of anxiety :(#like even the thought of logging back here has caused me to feel like sweating#my brain kept saying ‘no I don’t want to I can’t do that’ even when I felt bad for missing out on others posts#like I want to be here so I can support my mutuals dammit!!!#I’m a mess. I’m such a broken mess oh great lovely spectacular#maybe the culminating stress of final exam deadlines is worsening stuff as well#I can’t tell you why I’m like this I just am 🙃#anyways thinking I’ll start adapting to the distance. Sorry but being a shut-in is more appealing right now#I just need time to be with myself and not be so invested in the lives of others#anyways what’s something mildly positive I can wrap this up with so I don’t seem pathetic….#ah yes the final Puzzle sketch here was drawn today before a class period#one of my fellow classmates noticed and audibly asked me ‘is that Mr. Puzzles?’#IT TOOK EVERTHING IN MY WILLPOWER TO NOT LET OUT A GIDDY SHRIEK#Felt like my eyes bulged and I jolted in enthusiasm jskjsksp spontaneous happiness?? actally experiencing the feeling of fitting in??#anyways I responded with a very normal ‘WAIT YOU KNOW ABOUT HIM???’ while trying to suppress grinning or going ‘teehee’#anyways now it’s my personal mission to keep initiating conversations with her because AUUUUUGH SHE KNOWS WHO HE IS I’M LOSING IT#proceeded to talk about Murder Drones & TADC like holy SHIT I didn’t think I would ever find animation peeps in my psychology class auuu 😭💜#it’s a MIRACLE man this may be a sign that college won’t be isolating anymore yaaaaayyy#PUZZLE IS SINGLE HANDILY HELPING ME TALK TO PEOPLE BOTH ONLINE AND IRL THIS IS WILD#all hail the best comfort character seriously holy shit—like imagine she never noticed me drawing Puzzles!! I’D STILL BE LONELY AS HELL#okay sorry I’ll stop typing like a teenager and go back to pretending to be well-versed in speech & conducting myself ‘normally’ :3#doodles#sketches#hplonesome art#not tagging with Puzzles because hahaaaaa don’t look at me
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Doorkeay nation I have an idea
Flight of The Crows by Jhariah as Michael Shelley and Gerry before Sanikov Land
#doorkeay#gerrymichael#the magnus archives#“Well I’ve think that I’ve gotten go and I don’t know why#But I need you to promise that you won’t cry#Cause you’ll be fine and so will I#So just let the thought of me die”
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is episode 8 the domitian arc ? more on this and EVEN MORE narratives i’ve been ignoring that the show said “actually,,,” about in 5
#hermes staying domitian’s hand… hermes’ face a flash of discomfort when he was torturing tenax… hmm. character growth.#WHAT WAS THAT HERMES. WHAT WAS THAT LOOK. NO GIRL GET BACK HERE I CANNOT ALSO DO THIS NARRATIVE OF YOU NO LONGER ABLE TO PULL HIM BACK FROM#THE BRINK OF HIS CRUELTY WATCHING HIM CHANGE AND SEEKING OUT SOMEONE ELSE IN HIS NEED AND FEAR AND ANGST. NO BABY GIRLLLL#I DON’T WANT TO WRITE A HERMES POINT OF VIEWWWW OF THE SIX YEARS HE SPENT WATCHING DOMITIAN BLOOMMMM INTO HIS POWER AND CORRUPTTTT because.#correct me if i’m wrong but in that very first scene that was a young hermes in the white right he watched domitian give his speech and saw#his father to truly see him the whole time as hermes has seen his brilliance.#NO I ALSO SAW THAT GUARD’S HEAD FOLLOW HERMES oh i hate it here. you know what i also hate? i need domitian to be successful for tenax#but also i do kinda like titus… NOOOOOO NO KILLING TITUS DOMITIAN I JUST SAID I LIKED HIM!!!! DOMITIAN!!!#oh. ohhhh no. OH NOOOO okay listen we can redeem this. we can have the whole turning point of the narrative be domitian’s mercy of hermes#the ultimate staying of his hand. proving he’s not entirely gone that hermes & his love still means something. do i think this will happen#no absolutely not. before he can kill his brother domitian has to kill the only other living person he loves perhaps more than titus if he#could ever realize it. (a brief interlude to yell LET’S GO LESBIANS LET’S GO HI IRIS) domitian… please spare him… OH WAIT HELLO THE BLOOD!!#ALSO a brief interlude to say i knew it was coming but ELIA’S SPEECH ABOUT LOVING INCITATUS??? I WAS ON THIS INCITATUS SHIT WITH THE LITTLE#NOD THEY HAD WHERE SCORPUS CALLED HIM TO BEAT XENON OH MY GOD I CAN’T BELIEVE THIS!!! elia’s going to crush him. incitatus won’t listen.#scorpus is going to die twice once when they call elia’s name instead of his and then the second time when the scorpion bites him again#(he kills himself and tenax finds him. sorry to give everyone absolutely maximum damage here but uh. that’s how i can see it going down)#or alternatively worse: after killing titus who at times he loves and hates in equal measure (if y’all don’t think I have some UNHINGED#brothers quotes. we’ll keep mum here about why but suffice to say it is. relevant to other fandoms. and thus i have a Collection) the last#thing domitian has to do is kill hermes. and this one is both out of betrayal but also love because I think somewhere in here titus’ queen#berenice plays a role because domitian’s hatred of the jews probably comes to play a role and I think titus would show up and protect her#like Domitian engineers some kind of a situation where in theory titus could escape alive or beat him but he can’t do that & save berenice#and so of course he saved berenice. or she dies in his arms and he goes mad with grief and any way you put it berenice is the trap & titus#happily crawls into the lion’s mouth to save her for love of her etc and domitian sees him die for it. he gives titus every chance to come#back to him to work with him to be what he wants him to be and he always chooses himself he chooses love and domitian can’t understand even#when it makes him weak. and then he sees hermes dirty and emaciated and still terribly terribly beautiful and feels such a pang of longing#and love that he decides he has to die because he (domitian) cannot be weak. he cannot have any of it. also giving domitian worse paranoia#than he already has because if you kill your brother the one person who should always love you—support you—who can build me a new brother—#you’ve gotta generate some MAJOR issues. namely trust issues. and if he kills hermes they’ll be even worse. so like ideally To Me domitian#wouldn’t kill him but i do very much see the symbolism of cutting off his last earthly tie & desire to ascend to the divine imperial throne#those about to die
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what the fuck is wrong with meeee 👍
#why do i have no backbone whatsoever. why do i just let my mum use my money to fund her drug addiction#she owes me thousands at this point. i barely even care#thanks for letting your shitty boyfriend with the known gambling problem borrow my debit card btw mum. real nice of you.#and i’m just letting it happen. because what’s the point of being angry it won’t change anything#i mean seriously what are my options here. cut her off and watch her die from withdrawal because she refuses to take care of herself?#go live with my dad? and be surrounded on all sides by transphobia? never come out of the closet?#try to leave the nest as a depressed agoraphobe who’s never had a job in the middle of a housing crisis?#can someone come fucking save me from this nightmare of paralysis i’m in i’m so serious#uh. hi. me when i vent 👍
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guy who’s entire self worth and will to live when it is entirely and completely reliant on other people’s opinions on their work or something (IT DOES NOT EXIST WHATSOEVER)
#the crier#can i please please please die or just become perfect like everyone else is so i don’t have to experience this thanks#please genuinely kill me i’m going to be sick nothing i make is ever going to be loved there is no amount of changes that can be made#the art will reflect the artist and the artist is insignificant and worthless and unattractive and unappealing#it all means nothing and it all was nothing. i’ve accepted this but i’m never going to be okay with it#what the hell is even left here for me. what was i doing. i’m nothing. i don’t even exist#i just. i dont know. i wanted to exist.#i wouldn’t even care if *I* was loved. can’t you love what i love too? i made it. why doesn’t anyone see anything.#there isn’t anyone here man. no sincerity. i know what sincerity looks like. all i get something you people toss to me to shut me up#i’m genuinely scared i don’t have anything else. i don’t have anything else i don’t think anyone understands that this was my life#this is my last thread#i have no other reason to be here#i don’t think anything would stop me if this falls apart too#thinking about it more i want to say that i’d be fine with loving my creations myself. even if nobody else does. i think. they still make#me happy. i’m still happy. i think i can be fine if i just love them some more. i can still love them. and that will be enough. they’re fin#and i will be fine#i can just keep loving them and it will be fine. i don’t need anytone else to love them . i’m sorry#i’m still scared that i won’t let myself handle it. i’m scared and i don’t know why i’m so dependent on it i hate it i’m so so sick of it#i don’t want attention i dont want to need it i hate that i need it and i hate how. stupid. i get#when i just THINK that it’s not enough#why can’t i just carry them and myself away and enjoy them by myself. why do i need this so bad#i dont know why i need it so bad. they don’t even care. they arent real. they wouldn’t even want that attention on them
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personally i think it would be fun if michael got exposed to remnant pre scooping
#not saying i’m changing my main canon bc I’m Not but /any concepts to do with this makes me insane/#how? who knows! he can simply know things or it’s actually administered in some cursed circumstances-#would NOT like that. which is exactly why i wanna do it KSKDJD#that’s entirely dependent i just. why settle on one option for how he finds out about the horrors when there’s so much cursed potential in#all directions you know-#michael vc: god won’t let me die at freddy fazbears#⁂ ・゚: i was looking for a job‚ and then i found a job‚ and heaven knows i’m miserable now ➛ ooc
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i need to stop talking abt body image issues with people who don’t have a double chin
#it always just fills me with anger and jealousy and then with guilt and even more self hatred#about to say some truly selfish hateful shit i am aware is wrong and cruel which is why i’m saying it here —>#like oh my godddd im soooo sorry your family told you you needed to be a bit skinnier#you are extremely conventionally attractive and skinny with pretty hair and good clothes#people like you at a glance. people give you the fucking time of day#you have dated multiple people. multiple people have wanted to DATE you#i’m always the fucking outsider in these conversations because they’re always so… personal?#in that like. “oh i know im okay looking but my brain won’t let me think it”#like damn that sucks. i’m actually ugly and nobody will let me fucking forget it#but do tell me more about your pretty partner you love who fell in love with you instantly#i’ll be over here walking behind you realizing i’m twice your width#and wondering if there’s a way to put out a lifetime’s worth of artwork and creation so that i can get this stupid hopeless life over with#i will die unloved. i don’t even fucking care anymore#i just want to make some decent art people might like and be done with it all#chatter#sorry i need to get this off my chest Now so i can push my mood back up and not be snapping at people. im so good im so fine#i hate myself but thats a me issue. time to go have fun
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Fourth Wing by Rebecca Yarros is literal hot garbage and I will die on this hill.
#like it’s literally one of the worst constructed/written books I have ever encountered#how on earth could Yarros be married to a 20+ year military vet and yet still not even understand the most basic military concepts#it’s honestly astounding how brain dead her characters are#the way she writes makes it abundantly obvious that she thinks her readers are a bunch of idiots#who need every single story theme and element hand fed to them#the introduction of Varrish was just utter bullshit#she could have painted ‘VILLAIN’ on his forehead and it would’ve been less obvious#please tell us again how smart your main character is while she proceeds to do the dumbest shit I’ve ever seen#‘oh why won’t xaden trust me with rebellion secrets even though I basically announce my suspicions of the empire at every turn?’#idk violet maybe it’s bc you won’t do the mind training they’ve been telling you to do#so you’re constantly vulnerable to the mindreader YOU KNOW PERSONALLY#maybe that’s why no one tells you anything???#also holy shit her being like ‘I have to be careful and not let the empire know I’m questioning my duties’#and then immediately crashing into a scribe meeting to request more red flag reading??#like??? was she kicked in the head???#also the dragons stating multiple times that humans are basically like ants to them and they don’t care if they live or die#but simultaneously having to somehow be subserveant to the military????#bitch why weren’t you all enslaved by the dragons#this is such nonsense#also her prose is ass#come back when you can tell the difference between parse and parcel Rebecca#yeah a lot of my complaints are iron flame related#but that’s just bc it really hit home how bad this all is with the second book#net zero improvement#way to fail downwards Rebecca#ALSO!! what evil empire would conscript their enemies children into the one branch of their military where they get DRAGONS and SUPERPOWERS#like what??!!#in what world#what military would be so afraid of a new rebellion that they conscript the people with deep emotional ties to the old rebellion???#if real militaries worked this way there would be no more war bc we’d all be dead
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And then I finally end it off with some doodles of them… they make me feel things.
#ringmaster doodles#sona art#( they’re very much the theme of. love in the face of the neverending march of time. )#( being immortal and knowing you will outlive the man you love because someone else deemed he unworthy of eternal life. )#( he may still have tens of thousands of years left. sure. but you know that those will go by and he’ll disappear in the blink of an eye. )#( and you’ll sit there on his death bed. wondering why did things end up like this? )#( wondering what you did wrong. and if you could have done something different. you’ll always ask yourself. )#( if he lives a life of happiness and comfort or did he live a life as gruesome and miserable as the wars on earth? but you won’t know. )#( and the more you think about it. the more you realize it. how nihilistic he was. and how he never seemed to smile even in the good times.#he always seemed to have a frown or a scowl on his face. he always seems bothered and unhappy. )#( so you wonder if it was something you did. because you know you aren’t perfect. you’re hardly good. )#( you wonder if he’s mad at you. maybe he was. but he doesn’t have the heart to stay mad. )#( and that’s love in the face of adversity. knowing that no matter how bad it gets. he loves you as you love him. )#( and you wonder why he never smiles. because he truly never does. and so you ask him. honest and true. )#( and he tells you there isn’t anything worth smiling for. nothing in this whole world. )#( but he smiles at you. it’s always small. and it’s always brief. )#( but that smile. that smile means love. )#( that hug. as flimsy as it may be. that hug means love. )#( of course. he isn’t affectionate. if anything. he detests it. he hates physical contact of any kind. you’ve noticed. )#( which is a shame. you love your hugs and your kisses and your hand holding. )#( but even if he doesn’t like it. he lets you do it. because it makes you happy. )#( and you learn that when you’re happy. he’s a little less miserable. )#( of course. not all love is equal. and not all love is fair. )#( the love from a lover and the love from the father can never equate to one another. )#( no one will love you in the same way a father or mother loves you. in the same manner. no one will ever love you the way I do. )#( because my love will remain with you. long after I disappear. )#( and as bitter as the idea of my own existence coming to an end is. knowing I did all of this for. essentially nothing. )#( that I’ve gone through all this pain and suffering and hardship just for it to all amount to nothing. for it to be fucking useless to try.#I get to die knowing that you’ll always love and be loved. and that’s enough for me… )#( … maybe there is something worth smiling for after all. )
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honk shoo.
#but yeah sleepy.#i have so much to do these next few days I’m gonna die#meanwhile I just wanna see my friends#the good thing is that some of the busy things involve seeing my friends but goddamn why are almost all of them hard#also YES I’m going to be dumb and gay again bc a) why shouldn’t I b) nobody can stop me#I’m being dumb and gay again.#now seen The Guy twice since I’ve been back and he’s very cool#still feel like I’m being insane god idk what I’m doing#I hope he comes tomorrow bc he can’t make the meeting which means he won’t be on committee which sucks bc he did want to#OH but I did mean to tell him there was one role he could go for and have a good shot at that I think he’d be good for#only problem is if he doesn’t come tomorrow I can’t tell him in time bc I don’t have any way to message him other than email#(which feels slightly creepy bc I only know it bc secretary and he’s never explicitly said his surname so it’s just inferred from the list)#idk. the thing that gets me is we are very much friends now. like early stages of friends but we keep talking at hockey#and importantly he keeps coming To Me which keeps surprising me bc he does it more than any of my other friends#but I guess I’m also coming to him kinda a lot too. self awareness falls when around cute boy you get how it is#god it’s so unfair why is he like this#I finished getting my skates off before he did yesterday which gave me a very good opportunity to Look while he was talking#and have it not be weird and he’s just very pretty. he’s got a rlly nice nose#i always feel insane pointing out noses it’s the Draw speaking bc I use noses as a focal point and they’re fun to draw#tbh it’s unlikely I will say someone does Not have a nice nose but idk let me have this. it would be fun to draw is maybe what I mean#and I hadn’t noticed before bc the like bridge? and uhh like. base? idk nose words but they don’t match#the bridge is super long and on the thin side w a bump like mine but the like bottom is much rounder and wider and I don’t see that mix much#he also just has rlly nice hair it’s super curly and he’s in that like weird light brown purgatory where it’s all different colours#like it’s mostly light brown but some bits look rlly dark and some especially at the ends is like almost blonde and it changes w the light#god he also keeps doing this dumb fucking thing where he’s trying to skate while squatting all the way and it’s ridiculous#he looks like a spider folding in on itself and the worst part is he can fucking do it#he’s gotten so good at skating recently and I have a feeling he lives somewhere with an ice rink bc I’m sure he’s better than he was novembr#yeah I also got to just stand and watch him play yesterday and it’s so incredibly horribly unfair#anyway I’m too fucking gay and I will not let him escape me again tomorrow I Will get his instagram or smth bc I swear this man#luke.txt
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sims 4 rly hurt my feelings today !!!!! rambling explanation in the tags
#adri.txt#two of my best friends in game (random npcs) DIED.#And i was like ok im prepared for this i knew it was coming. i wrote books of life for them.#tried using the books of life to bring them back. didn’t work#google it. it only works on ppl in ur household.#ok. cool. thanks. yeah. okay#i refuse to let my two good friends die just because i can’t personally resurrect them (i should be allowed to!!!)#so. entered create a sim and made them young adults again. 👍🏻#not even any of the like. Normal npcs. like the goths or the bff household.#they were both just trainers at the gym and they became my friends.#trinity and keegan i won’t let you die 💪🏻#anyways i was literally actually distraught over this and texting my best friend about it like HELP ME !!!!!!#(he also plays a lot of sims 4)#everything is fixed now but it ruined my vibes for the night.#i was gonna get so much stuff done in game. and now the vibes r ruined#idk why i put all of this in the tags and not in the main post ?#feels better to make a bunch of tags than to talk in a post. am i weird 🤨
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nothing like a day of almost passing out since the moment you wake up because it’s extremely hot and you have to do housework
#lemon man talks#I’m gonna throw up#I couldn’t even have breakfast I had to go straight to cooking#If I step into the kitchen I’m actually gonna pass out I have low pressure problems#Also had to do laundry dishes and set the table yipee#And my brother is. Playing roblox. Very helpful.#He’s fully capable of at least taking his dirty laundry to the washing machine but nooo he throws everything into his chair and i have to#Sort through a disgusting clothing pile to figure out what’s clean and what’s dirty AND take it to the machine#And my parents just let him do whatever while giving me more orders and well let’s just say I haven’t had a single day off since summer#Break started#And I’m going on a big trip soon!! For studying!! In like a few days in fact!!#My grandma is here visiting so she’s sleeping in my room and I have to sleep with my fucking brother!!!#I can’t do anything and I had to move all my things and clean my room for my grandma to spend 3 days there!!!!! I’m ok#I’ve been having the worst 3 years of my life but whatever I don’t need a break who needs a break#I had to listen to my mom discuss why people shouldn’t get medication yesterday at lunch. I hate it here.#I can’t even get a diagnosis and now i know that if I did get it I wouldn’t be able to get medication. Rejoice!#Yesterday I joked about my mom changing my name legally to something stupid like tangerine and my father said “there won’t be a change whil#I’m still alive” fuck you if you don’t die then I’m killing you with hammers I hate you so much you’ve destroyed my life already thanks#Well this was. A rant#Byesies
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battlefield | choi su-bong (thanos)
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・❥・ summary: running into your ex boyfriend during the squid games was the last thing you expected ・❥・word count: 719 ・❥・warnings: uh... usual squid game stuff. ・❥・ authors note: this is a short one just to test the waters but im obsessed with this man after watching squid game 2 <333
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There he was. The last person you’d ever expected to see in this place. Player 230. Choi Su-Bong or, as the world knew him as, Thanos. The bright purple hair had been easy to spot. The last few months had been spent avoiding him so why did fate want to throw you together in this place? Wherever the hell this place was. You still weren’t even sure but as you walked up the stairs to the first game, you didn’t really care. All you wanted to do was lay low and make sure that Thanos didn’t see you. A conversation with your ex boyfriend was the last thing you wanted.
Things had ended badly between the two of you when he’d lost all his money thanks to the crypto scam. It had changed him, turned him into someone you didn’t recognise anymore so when the arguments started and his behaviour became erratic, you knew you had to get out of there. So, you did. You left and had never looked back. All you wanted was enough money to get out of the city and far, far away. There was nothing here for you anymore. If you could win the games then you could finally start fresh somewhere.
Walking through the doors onto a floor of sand and brightly coloured walls, you heard the voice of Thanos talking to his friend. Instantly, you looked down at the ground, hoping he didn’t see you. Unfortunately for you, he had stood next to you. His eyes scanned your face before recognition lit his eyes up.
“Senorita!” He said in a sing-song voice, wide grin on his face as he outstretched his arms. “What are you doing here? Come on, give me a hug.”
“None of your business and no thanks,” you rolled your eyes.
“I’m hurt,” he splayed his hand on his chest over his heart. As much as he was using his confident swagger to irritate you, deep inside he couldn’t be more glad to see you. “Not even going to give me a chance to talk, huh? That’s stone cold.”
As the rules of the game echoed through the speakers, he couldn’t take his eyes off you. His hand had raised to his friend to stop him from talking to him so he could get a proper look at you. When you had left, that had been the breaking point for him. Everything had gone downhill from there. For so long he’d been trying to seek you out, to apologise but he knew you’d been avoiding him. Your friends wouldn’t tell him where you were, your family had chewed him out the second he had showed up on their doorstep so, eventually, he’d given up. But, here you were.
As Player 456 shouted out about the game being a lie and that you were going to die, your head shot up. Surely he couldn’t be telling the truth, right? Red Light, Green Light was a children’s game. At most you were probably going to be out of the running for the cash if you were caught moving.
“He’s crazy,” Thanos said. It was his way of trying to comfort you. He had instantly noticed the slight panic in your eyes, the way you were rubbing your hands against your thighs. “Don’t listen to him.”
All you could do was nod but there was a gut feeling inside you telling you that maybe it wasn’t entirely all crazy talk. Something about this whole thing felt off. Your eyes caught some girl talking, her hands waving around then suddenly she was on the ground. Instantly, fear gripped you, your stomach dropping. The room around you started to spin – you were really going to die here.
“Hey, hey,” Thanos had reached out, his hand gripping yours as he stood in front of you, back to you. “Stay behind me. I won’t let anything happen to you. You hear me? Stay behind me.”
“But… what if…” The sheer panic in your voice made his heart clench.
“No. We’re both getting out of here alive, okay? Now, stay behind me.” His protective instinct had kicked in. Right now, he didn’t care if you hated him. All he cared about was making sure you survived this so maybe, just maybe, he could finally make things right.
#thanos x reader#choi su-bong x reader#choi seunghyun#squid game x reader#t.o.p#squid game#thanos#choi su bong
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I don’t really know why I’m still here honestly. Gave life a go, had some good times and some bad times but the good times are over now (no matter how much I try to gaslight myself into thinking there’s still hope when there clearly fucking isn’t). Like y’know I’ve had enough, I’m done, I’m ready to stop now
#and it’s not like I really have a job to do in my system either#I mean. I did. but then I ended up too broken to do it and now I just make shit worse for everybody#I’m. Kinda only here for my sister and girlfriend at this point. wish they’d let me go (I understand why they won’t)#I just really really wish I could die can you tell#vent post#suicide tw
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YAY, YOU'RE BACK TO WRITING FOR ARCANE. How would the arcane characters react (mainly vi, ekko, and jinx because i would marry, marry, and marry them all!!) to a reader who is sooo affectionate and finds every last thing they do so cute they get cuteness aggression and just jump at them like a cuddle bug often? thank you so much!!
Coming right up!
Arcane x Cuddle Bug! Reader
Characters: Powder/Jinx, Violet "Vi", Ekko, Caitlyn Kiramman, Viktor, Jayce Talis, Mel Medarda, Sevika and Ran.
Warning: None really. SFW.
A/N: Am I the only one who wants to snuggle into Caitlyn? Ugh, I love her so much.
Powder/Jinx
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/1122eccf5e1e0f9aa6229f648c7cd44d/43283b76ba7735a5-7b/s540x810/d67a2a0411bcf89b82118d75c005540e0465b19e.jpg)
“Oh! Hey there, sugar! You want to cuddle? Don’t have to ask me twice! I’ll cuddle you so much that you get tired of me! But you’d never get tired of me, right?”
Jinx is a super clingy person, so for you to be as clingy as her it’s like you two are a match made in heaven. There’s barely any time that passes when you two are not touching each other and she lives for your cuddles. It doesn’t matter if you hug her out of nowhere or she sees you about to embrace her, she is stopping everything she is doing and pulling you into the tightest of hugs.
Most of the time if she isn’t causing mayhem in the streets of Zaun or busy with her inventions, she will spend her time just holding you so close and showering your face with the cutest but most childish of kisses. She doesn’t care if it’s in private or public, she will make it known that you two can’t keep your hands off each other. You are her cuddlebug and she is yours and that won’t ever change.
Violet “Vi”
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/2b47ca0c7063fdb05d718a3726740bb6/43283b76ba7735a5-92/s540x810/cb3b1be0acbbd9014b06fba2eddc9e99cfbd249f.jpg)
“Woah there, cuddle bug! You’re gonna make me screw up my workout… Oh forget it. How can I say no to you?”
Because Violet is absolutely touch starved, she will never decline your cuddles, even if you take her by surprise a few times with how you hug her so suddenly. She finds it adorable how you fangirl around her and find everything she does to be awesome or cute. Granted she does wish you’d call her hot or sexy, but knows that isn’t really in tune with your personality.
Regardless, she tries to make sure you know how adorable you are, always telling you while you two are cuddled up together how lucky she is to have you and how you are so adorable. Even when you visit her at work, she’ll try to drop everything and have you run into her arms to pick you up. And every time she’s got time off work or is coming back from a job, she’s automatically looking for you so she could hook you in her arms and never let go.
Ekko
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/470d450b6f1c376d055986af37625ba5/43283b76ba7735a5-65/s540x810/9389cbd6dd18eb1a61eaa6217e16b286f1ba4ed4.jpg)
“Y/N, haha! You know we gotta keep this private, babe- The kids are gonna pounce on us any second now!”
Does Ekko love hugging you? Absolutely. The warmth of your arms around his body makes him stop everything he’s doing and just hug you while calling you his firelight or firefly. Unless he’s calling you an angel or lovebug, which never fails to make Scar either look at you two in awe or roll their eyes in mock annoyance. Unfortunately, Ekko does try his best to make sure you two don’t get super affectionate around the children, especially when it comes to hugs.
Why? Because as soon as you hug him, the children find this as an invitation to gather around him and have him nearly die under a cuteness overload of a group hug. It’s nice as a once in a while occurrence, but all the time? Maybe not. Outside of the reactions you two garnish and even the teasing of you being the firelight king/queen, Ekko lives for your cuddlebug energy, wanting to be in your arms after a long day’s work. It’s always the best way to end the night…
Caitlyn Kiramman
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/1f24096fde0d1f23825e25ef427a8100/43283b76ba7735a5-1c/s500x750/f0b9402defa6e34e956fec2c96e29ea9a765252a.jpg)
“And that’s why if I am able to block this end of the road, I’ll- Oh!... Oh come here, sweetheart. If you wanted to cuddle so badly, you could’ve asked.”
Caitlyn has always been someone who was more subtle with her love, pulling you into brief kisses, cupping your cheek and holding you by your waist. She usually leaves the more out there gestures like hugging and cuddling for you to initiate. But when you do? It might be harder for you to get her off of you instead of the other way around. It can be at work, in her home, outside of work or at an event. As soon as she feels your arms wrap around her slender body, she’s stopping for a second to hold you back and kiss your forehead.
She will continue working if you interrupt her during a briefing or in the middle of cracking a case, but the entire time, she will have at least one arm around your body and make sure you are comfortable. Her comrades tease her about it and she’ll scowl a bit, but she doesn’t care. As far as she can tell, she’s extremely lucky to have you as a lover.
Viktor
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/ff1a1f75fe583ac667716726e27e2d98/43283b76ba7735a5-88/s540x810/3b28aea68e828d879815915f4beffeb3ed0a1b97.jpg)
“Ah! Oh, it is just you, zolotse. Remember, you have to warn me of these cute little hugs of yours.”
At first, Viktor wasn’t used to your physical affection and how you were in awe of everything he did. He actually thought you were mocking him at first or being silly. But after a while, especially when the two of you became a couple, he grew accustomed to your affections. He does get a bit startled when you hug him out of nowhere and he does have moments where you cheering him on does make him a bit bashful, but he enjoys your sweet gestures regardless.
He does find it difficult to be as outgoing with his love for you as you are with him, but he does try his best to make you realize he loves you, especially in the form of quality time and calling you by sweet pet names bound to make you blush. Viktor has a tendency to pass out from working too hard and waking up in your arms. And though he’d never say it out loud, you know based on the way he snuggles into you, he adores it and adores you.
Jayce Talis
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/f3ed8d2679511701befe4927a7389d01/43283b76ba7735a5-4b/s400x600/69bcec9630c43ff484147ac2b3411bc0cb47947f.jpg)
“I know what you want and I want it too- So bring it in! I’ve waited all day to be in your arms!”
Because Jayce is always out at work, it’s kind of hard for you two to be around one another all the time. That’s why when he does reunite with you after hours or you two can be together on days off, he’s spending the majority of his free time with you or wrapped around you. He sort of craves for your praise and compliments as much as he craves your cuddles.
Many would compare the councilman to a needy dog wanting his owner’s undivided attention and he definitely gets that through you. Though he may try to act all cool or play coy, everyone knows that you mean so much to him and that he becomes putty around you. Even if they don’t, you’re not afraid to say it aloud. Just make sure Jayce isn’t around or that man will become redder than a beet.
Mel Medarda
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/1ae269f19420f1b1662b1cee2bf370b8/43283b76ba7735a5-0e/s540x810/f172eb4ab30ae7e92a7ebb16ad92467f0fb74970.jpg)
“What’s wrong?... I know that look. You want to- Ah! Well looks like you beat me to the punch, darling. How about we take this to the bed, hmm?”
Mel wasn’t really given physical affection when she was younger. She was more someone who preferred verbal affection with words of affirmation. So when it came to you and how affectionate you are, she found herself adapting and loving physical affection as much as telling you how much she loved you.
Your cuddles and sweet gestures are her personal heaven she loves returning to after a long day’s work, especially if she can spend an evening with you platonically in your shared bed. In your arms, she feels she can air out anything that’s bothering her or interests her, especially when you admit how cute it is when she does. Though this kind of intimate affection is delegated to private quarters, anyone can know from the way Mel speaks of you outside of home and at events that you mean so much to her.
Sevika
“Yeah! So then I was like screw you, I can do whatever- Hold on. Uh, Y/N. I thought we agreed to not do this at work?”
Sevika is considered the Right Hand of Zaun, a woman who is feared if not respected by her peers. And she’d like to keep it that way. Which means that while you two are at work, she prefers it if you don’t cuddle her around co-workers and give them something to tease her about. You two can only flirt and kiss and even then, it has to be sexy…
But alone, when both of you are away from the public eye, Sevika is at your beck and call wishing for nothing else but to hear your sweet praises and melt into your arms and touch. Expect her to call you the cutest thing ever and tease you on occasion, but afterwards she’s basically a big needy cat, or as she prefers to be called, a panther. It’s moments like these where you can really consider yourself lucky to see a raw side of Sevika. And it was only preserved for you.
If you got any requests for Arcane or X-Men '97, send them my way!
Likes and retweets are always appreciated! I love you all, stay hydrated and have a good day! <3
#x reader#x female reader#x you#x male reader#arcane x reader#fluff headcanons#headcanons#jinx x reader#jinx x y/n#jinx x gender neutral reader#vi x you#vi x reader#vi x y/n#caitlyn x reader#caitlyn x y/n#ekko x reader#sevika x reader#sevika x you#sevika x y/n#viktor x you#viktor x oc#viktor x reader#viktor x y/n#jayce x reader#mel x reader#requests are open#requests are welcome#requests are still open btw
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