#why is it so hard to come up with this stuff

[naughtyjjk]

nanami kento hates masturbating

characters: nanami warnings: 18+, smut, masturbation, that's pretty much it notes: happy new year!! i type this up in like 30 minutes lol. enjoy my first nanami smut of the year, and i promise i'll get to all my other unfinished wips soon <3

nanami finds it an inconvenience whenever he gets horny.

he hates that he's subjected to his body's desires, and he'll try to power through it every time, but it never works. it's so stupid.

he always tries to ignore it, but he can't focus on anything when his cock is hard in his pants. the bulge is so obvious, so big, that he can't hide it. and trying not to think about it only has the opposite effect; it becomes all he can think about, and it doesn't help that his cock twitches with need the longer he neglects it.

fuck, he thinks, why can't he get it under control? he's not a desperate teenager anymore. he has important things to do; he can't keep wasting time on masturbating.

it's only when his cock throbs, aching painfully, leaking with precum and creating a wet spot in his pants that he finally gives in. it's become unbearable. with a frustrated groan, he removes his belt and unzips his pants, unable to hold back the sigh of relief that escapes him as he pulls out his cock.

he spreads his legs, wrapping a hand around the base of his cock. he feels it pulse eagerly against his palm, hissing as he fights to hold back a moan. he's so fucking hard already. there's enough precum that his entire length is slick as he starts to pump himself, dragging his hand all the way up to the tip and back down again.

his grip is loose at first, as if he's still in denial about how much he needs this. he convinces himself that he can go slow, that he only needs a bit of stimulation to ease his arousal. but soon, he's groaning and whining and stroking his cock like he means it—faster, harder, oh fuck—

it feels good. god, it feels so fucking good, and he can't stop. when he starts to get really into it, losing himself to the pleasure, he pulls up the bottom of his shirt and stuffs it in his mouth, biting down on it to try and muffle his sounds.

that's when his self-control snaps.

the thing is, he knows exactly what he likes. he has urges, he gives in when the temptation is too strong and he's too turned on, he's played with himself before. so he twists his wrist in a way that has him moaning, back arching forward. he pays extra attention to his cockhead, swirling his thumb around the tip and smearing the beads of precum that are spilling out.

"a-ah—hah—ngh—" his breathing comes out in shaky, ragged breaths. he's panting. his hips are moving on their own uncontrollably, without his permission, fucking into his fist like a wild animal giving over to its instincts.

he dips a finger into his slit, rolls his palm over the tip, and gasps. he strokes down the shaft, hips bucking up helplessly to meet himself halfway. his other hand slides up to his chest and pinches at his nipples. the moan that escapes him is awful, low and raspy, making it so obvious how turned on he is.

it's all so filthy, and he's close, he's fucking close. his cock is flushed a deep red, veins bulging out along his erection, streaks of precum flowing endlessly down the shaft. his balls feel so heavy, so full. god, he can't deny it at all anymore. he wants to come so bad.

he strokes himself in a steady rhythm that has him falling apart, trembling and squirming on the spot. it's too much, too overwhelming. and shit, he's so fucking close now. he's—he's going to come. his cock is about to burst, throbbing and throbbing and throbbing—

"oh, fuck—f-fuck—"

his muscles tense and his hips stutter as he squeezes around his cock. his mind goes blank. with a few more strokes, nanami comes hard, all over himself, painting his abs in white. it shoots out in spurts, thick and sticky, releasing everything that's been pent up since the last time he indulged himself.

the worst part is that it feels so damn good. his cock gives one last twitch and he thinks that he could get addicted to this, easily.

but the rational side of him tells him no. it's an inconvenience whenever he gets horny; an inconvenience to masturbate and jerk himself off. think of all the important things he has to do instead.

so he hates it. really, he does. next time, he promises himself that he won't give in to the temptation.

.

tag list: @megumisdivinedogs @urlilwhore @l0rdgeosupport3rr @purple-obsidian @l0rdgeosupport3rr @minni-creations @fos-tis-zois @the-reas0n-is-y0u @cantfeelherface @rxmbzzz @lysaray @zelzablues @str4wbrrycandy @that-goth-bisexual @simping4u @iminlovewqr0w @sharks31 @pseudowho @jisoonunn @outkasti @anathemaspeaks @fushigur0slut4 @barryatsumu @d0nk3y-k0ng @shasaaa15 @wil10wthetree @maskedpacific @genshingeeksworld @itsnotmelo

(comment to be added)

[anyroads]

Hello again to one of my favorite posts on Tumblr! Because yes, this, exactly.

I'm going to add onto this post as someone who's spent several years working through trauma with a therapist. Doing so doesn't make me an authority on the subject by any means, but it does mean I've put a lot of thought and study into it alongside someone whose formal training and qualifications make them an excellent resource. And it also means that I have experiences and responses which, while not representative of everyone, are nevertheless worth something, especially to those who believe in elevating voices instead of speaking for people as an act of support.

Trauma is a result of instinctive defensive responses that, put simply, activate your fight and flight response. The brain identifies danger, the frontal cortex begins to go offline, and the amygdala takes over. One of the major effects of this is on memory: when the frontal cortex is online, memories are formed as linear stories with a beginning, middle, and end (this is also why we tell stories this way, because it's literally how our brains save experiences).

Part of a traumatic experience is that since certain brain functions are essentially off, memories aren't stored as memories. It's kind of like if your memory center was a filing cabinet and every memory was a file neatly stored in that cabinet, then trauma is a folder that's left on top of the cabinet or dropped on the floor somewhere nearby. It's still in the folder, ie. you can remember the event and you might remember the beginning, middle, and end, or you might have even taken the pieces and shoved them into that format later to make sense of them. But your brain hasn't put them in the cabinet. They aren't filed under "completed experience." So then every time something happens that triggers that memory, your brain's defense response is to think it's happening again, and it starts going into fight or flight mode. To your brain, that experience isn't over - it's an open folder, and therefore its story can continue at any moment.

This is what the word "triggered" actually means, btw. It means your frontal cortex starts going offline and your amygdala starts taking over, because your brain thought that was the best defensive response at the time of the traumatic experience, so it's relying on using the same response again because if you survived, then it must have been effective, right? It's really hard to tell your brain that it doesn't need to do this, and that triggering an anxiety response isn't helpful. At all. This was a helpful response when we lived in the wilderness and, say, while you're sitting around making arrowheads, you hear a twig snap and then a saber toothed tiger leaps out of the bush and mauls your clan mate to death in front of you. So every time you hear a twig snap, your brain thinks there's a saber toothed tiger coming, and goes into fight or flight mode.

This helped when that adrenaline response meant your reflexes were quicker and you could run faster, and a twig snapping meant there was a good chance something was sneaking up on you. But that's not the case anymore, and your brain is just basically taking innocuous stimuli and translating it as a threat in situations that aren't dangerous and you'd actually be better able to deal with if you didn't have to go through a trigger response. One thing I've learned to do in the last couple of years is to identify what this process feels like in my body physically, catch it early, and do mental exercises that keep my frontal cortex online and avoid having triggered responses. It's been difficult to learn and to carve out these neural pathways, and to understand the whole process. This is hard, complex, grueling stuff.

So yes, OP is 100% correct and words like "trauma" and "triggered" are overused in ways that disrespectful and minimizing to people who actually experience these things. To be traumatized is much more than to be upset. It's to go through an experience that changes your psychological response to certain stimuli or situations. It's not just an unpleasant experience, it's one that leaves mental (and sometimes physical) scars. I'm talking about experiences ranging from, but not limited to, abuse, serious accidents, physical violations, etc. and not seeing a scene in a movie that you didn't like. And hey, we can even give space to things like disturbing content that replays in your brain again and again - I experience this, it's called an intrusive thought, and it's not the same as a traumatic experience.

Stop using the vocabulary of people with legitimate needs to exaggerate your personal discomforts. It's selfish and obnoxious and minimizes the struggles and needs of people who actually experience the things you're stealing the language for.

I'm wondering if, as a society who cares about vulnerable people, we could stop saying "traumatize" when we truly mean "upset"?

I am sick of hearing sad books or movies "traumatize" their readers. I simply do not believe that happens. A traumatic experience might be adjacent to books (I have vivid memories of books I was reading around certain experiences and even how the contents of those books affected my processing of the experiences). But it's not caused by the book. And, y'know. The weather is Christofascist Censorship Attempts outside.

Meanwhile from the other side I continue to be surprised at just how badly people fail to understand trauma and traumatic experiences in general. Watering down the term isn't helping. Find other hyperbole to express that The Bridge to Terebithia gutted you, chewed on your heartstrings, and made you cry your first pair of contact lenses right out of your preteen eyes.

[prettymeredith]

Fantasy of the Day: The Ticklish Dancer

"Nobody's gonna come looking for you? You told everyone you'd be staying late tonight after dance rehearsal? Mhm, such a good girl."

My dance instructor has been bugging me for weeks for slme extra 1 on 1 lessons after class. Now alone, strapped up in an empty dance studio, it wasn't hard to figure out why.

"Sensitive honey? Aww, always thought you had a cute laugh, now I get you all to myself. None of those pesky peers of yours getting in the way, asking about their pirouette."

I guess all those times streching my calf muscles on her shoulders made me too trusting. Now I was stuck here, tickled by a sassy older woman, teasing me, and having her way with my feet.

"Ever wonder what your feet smile like after a couple of hours at class? Haha~ Yeah, that's what you smell like. Yummy huh? I think so."

She wasn't lying about her affinity for my sweaty dance feet. Quickly inserting my toes in her mouth, and tickling my arches before I even knew how to react.

"Qwff!? Hwahafhwahafhaf!! Hnm mhy Gwdd!!"

My giggles echoed around the empty dance studio. I could feel my cheeks flushing as my instructor ticklishky ran her mouth and fingers all over the soles of my sweaty feet.

"Nwhhh! Hnnhff!! Sthawwppfft, hnhmhnhff!!"

"Oh hush, that any way to talk to your instructor? We got at least a couple more hours of your private lesson to get through. But if thats how it's gonna be, I have my ways of shuttin' you up."

I couldn't even apologize before having her damp dance socks stripped and stuff into my mouth; moist with all of the shuffle steps, axel turns, high kicks she'd done since that morning.

"Hmm, now where was I? Mhmm... See, isn't that much better?" She teased picking right back up with tickling me to shattered pieces.

"Hmmhnmhnm!! Gmmnnhh!!? Hnhmhnhnhh!"

My instructor's own pleasured laughter and giggles echoed louder than my own from under the gag. I was trapped, watching her enjoy herself with a spark of enjoyment and arousal I'd never seen from her before.

Her obsession with my feet was unparalleled. From toe sucking to arch nibbling, to frenzied tickle torture that felt unbearable. The agony of my ticklish peril fueling her to go on.

"Don't hide it sweetheart, I can see it wrritren all over that adorable face of yours. You're enjoying this as much as I am, if not more."

"You had your suspicions, but you stayed late anyway. You let me stock you up. You didn’t fight when I stuffed my socks in your mouth."

Neither her tickles or her teases as she imposed her affection for me and my feet over the course of the evening. Humiliating me to my core, tickling me silly, and calling me out on my own arousal.

The inner confliction between regret and continued interest as she touched and prodded exposed skin. Her smile and judgmental gazes making me blush everytime I glanced at her face.

"Alright dollface, that was fun. I'll come back in a few hours to get you. Don't miss me too much."

[leighsartworks216]

What's the Whole World

Sylus x gn!Reader

Wrote this when I was overstimulated and extra emotional from my period iykyk

Title from "What's the Whole World" by Warmer

Warnings: hurt/comfort, established relationship, cuddling, crying, swearing

Word Count: 1,395

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Second Love and Deepspace Masterlist

AO3

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Your apartment building's hot water isn't working, so you take a freezing cold shower. Your bike doesn't start, so you have to take the bus. You forgot to eat breakfast, so you go to the vending machine, except the snack gets stuck against the glass. You don't get to eat lunch because you get sent on back to back missions. You have to stay late to finish the paperwork for said missions. The food you buy at a late night stall is too expensive and almost too overcooked to eat.

But through all of that, through every little thing the world does to spite you today, one thought kept you sane: Sylus. You don't have work for the next couple days and Sylus moved things around on his schedule to spend all of that time with you. Being able to spend time with him is the one thing holding you together right now.

Imagine your disappointment when you get to his base in the N109 zone, excited to see him after the ungodly public transport you had to take, only to be told by Luke and Kieran that he isn't there. Not only that, they're not sure when he'll be back, after he zipped off to meet up with someone for whatever business venture he's planning on branching off to next. They offer you a ride back to your place, but the thought of going back home, to your freezing water and cramped walls, only makes you feel worse.

So you do the next best thing: you curl up in Sylus's bed, hugging a Grumpy Crow plushie, and try really hard not to cry.

You feel hollow. A void in your chest, opening its maw wide to swallow your hope, optimism and joy, regurgitating loneliness and disappointment in its place. It shouldn't be that big of a deal. Things happen, stuff comes up. Especially when you're the leader of a giant illegal faction, and owner of god knows how many businesses. Just... why didn't he tell you about it?

Tears sting your eyes. You don't want to cry. Not here, not in Sylus's bed. Could anything be more pathetic? You should have just gone home. At least there you could drown yourself in a mountain of ice cream without having to worry about being seen making the trip to and from the kitchen.

The longer you suppress your emotions, the more your brain reminds you of the shit day you've just had.

The cold water meant taking an extremely quick 10 second shower. The bus ride was so cramped you were pressed up against so many other commuters. The only thing you've eaten today wasn't worth the price, leaving a hole in your stomach yet to be satisfied. Your whole body aches, from your arms and shoulders to your back and legs. You're tired, you're upset, and all you were asking for to compensate for all of that bullshit is a hug. Just one hug! A hug this plushie certainly wasn't providing.

You curl around the crow plushie, squeezing it with the remaining strength you have in your arms. You press your face into its soft head, the ruffle around its neck tickling you. You take a deep breath. And you cry. The worst kind of crying: deep heaving gasps for air, ragged sobs that grate at your throat, fat tears that have no end and soak deep into the fabric of the plushie and Sylus's pillow; body shaking, soul crushing, pathetic. You want the bed to open up and swallow you whole. You want Dr. Zayne to go in and remove your heart to spare you the pain. You just want this horrible feeling to go away, by any means possible.

God knows how long you cry for. It feels like hours. Your eyes burn, raw from all the moisture. Your cheeks are sore from the horrible grimace your face pulls with your sobs. The crow is completely soaked where your face is.

The bed shifts, slowly. Hesitantly. You choke up again, because you already know who it is.

A hand touches your arm. You automatically flinch out of its grasp. A bitter part of you wants to make him feel just as bad as you do. Wants to lie here crying while he's forced to watch. But, god, that one touch alone is like the sun after weeks of rain. It's like a splash of bright yellow against the dark, saturated hues that compose your sorry state. And when he doesn't touch you again, it's consumed once more by the darkness.

"What happened?" he asks. His voice is so soft, tinged with protectiveness. If someone hurt you, he'd take care of it. He'd do anything to take this heartache from you. All you would need to do is say the word. What, then, are you supposed to say if he's the one that hurt you?

Another sob wracks your body. You curl in impossibly tighter, as though you could shrink yourself down to the size of a pea to hide from his intense gaze on your back. Your throat hurts from crying so hard.

"Can I touch you?" he asks next, when you don't respond.

Your body and mind want two different things. Your mind wants to hold strong to your newfound loneliness, but your body yearns to crawl to him, to collapse in his arms, to finally, finally get that hug you were waiting for.

It's your body that wins out, in the end, but you refuse to give in completely to its desires. So instead of seeking him out, you just nod and wait for him to come to you.

He does, almost right away. He touches your arm again. When you don't pull away, he closes the space left between you. His chest presses against your back, legs tucked right up to yours. His arms wrap around your body, securely keeping you against him. He presses his face to the back of your neck. Like this, he feels every tremor and shiver of every gasp and sob. Like this, you feel encapsulated in his warmth and comfort. It's almost overwhelming. It almost suffocates you with how amazing it feels to finally be held by him.

He kisses the fine hairs on your neck in a delicate peck, silently telling you how badly he wants to help. "Will you tell me what happened, sweetie?"

You dig your fingers into the Grumpy Crow's plush body. They tremble with emotion. "You weren't h-here," you whimper out. Your voice is awful. "'N y-you didn't say a-anything about it."

"I didn't...?" One of his arms slips away. He digs his phone out of his pocket and taps quickly at the screen, before dropping it to the bed behind him with a sigh. His arm returns to its rightful place around you, squeezing you slightly tighter. "It didn't go through, kitten. I'm sorry."

That text was meant to get to you hours ago. Unfortunately, he must have lost service before it could go through. So for hours, you were left in the dark, literally and metaphorically, with no idea where he was or what he was doing.

He kisses your neck again. "How can I make it up to you? Name anything - it's yours."

Anything? There's only one thing you want. And now that you know his radio silence wasn't intentional, your mind loses the reins holding your body back.

You push the crow plushie away. It rolls sadly across the bed, dark fabric stained darker with tears and fluff rearranged so he's squished into an odd shape. Sylus lets go when you squirm in his hold. You turn around and immediately cling onto him. You hide your face in his neck and he cradles the back of your head to keep you there. His cologne floods your senses, accompanied by his body wash, warming you in a way the lingering scent on his pillow and bedsheets never could.

"Just want you." You grip the back of his shirt in your fists, squeezing him as tightly as you can, just like you'd done to the plushie. Except he's solid, and he squeezes you back just the same. "Please don't go."

"I'm not going anywhere," he promises. "We'll stay here for as long as you want."

"Forever."

"Okay, sweetie." He kisses your head. "We'll stay here forever."

---

Tag List:

@the-golden-jhope @huen1ngk41 @armycaratlover @sylusfluffymeow @cheesemachine44 @nyx2021 @angel-jupiter @thelittlebutton @pikachuzhc @pomegranatepip @cordidy @an-ever-angry-bi @thejysemongko 

[wonderjanga]

Ms. Kent and Billy

it’s 1959 and it’s been a year ever since Billy got his powers. Life is good and he found out about a pie eating contest happening in some little town in Kansas called Smallville. If you were to win, you’d get a whole $100.

Billy: “A hundred whole dollars… I could get food for weeks- no, months with that!”

Martha(Ma Kent): *appeared behind him* “Are you gonna participate in the contest?”

Billy: *startles* “Uh… Yes?”

Martha: “Aren’t you a little skinny for that?”

Billy: “Wha- I’m not skinny! I don’t think I’m too skinny at least.”

Martha: *looks him up and down wondering if he’d let her cook a bunch of food for him* “Sure. Hey, I don’t think I’ve seen you around here before. Are you new to Smallville?”

Billy: “Yes. This is my first time here actually.”

Martha: “Oh? So you’re just here for the pie contest?”

Billy: “Yup. I’m gonna eat as much pie as I can, and then I’m gonna get the money.”

Martha: “Will you tell me if they’re good?”

Billy: “Sure? Why?”

Martha: “Cause me and my mom made all the pies for the competition!”

Billy: “Oh, that’s amazing!” *looks starstruck*

Martha: *sounds proud* “I know.”

Billy didn’t end up winning the competition. He actually ended up vomiting after his first pie because his little malnourished self couldn’t handle all of that. Martha was there though to clean him up with a rag. They got to know each other better after that and soon enough, Billy would transform into Marvel, fly over to Smallville, and hang out with her. Martha even got to know Freddy because he would sometimes fly over with Billy too. Then the time bubble happened and fast forward 50 years. Billy, after panicking about his entire life and everything he knows it being over, went to go see Martha, who was conveniently still near Smallville.

Billy: *knocks on the door*

Martha: “Coming!” *opens the door and looks around seeing no one*

Billy: “Down here.”

Martha: *looks down to Billy and pauses to stare*

Billy: “Heeeeeeeey Martha.” *awkward wave*

Martha continued to stare at him for a solid minute before she rubbed her eyes, and then rubbed them again for good measure.

Martha: “Billy…?”

Billy: “Martha…?”

Martha: “Oh- my… Oh my Gosh!” *kneels down so she can look him over even going as far as to pinch his little cheeks to make sure he’s real*

Billy: “Ow! Martha, stop!” *bats away her hands*

Martha: *keeps trying to pinch him aways* “Are you real?”

Billy: “Yes?”

Martha: *has seen too much nonsense due to Clark* “Well, if you’re the real Billy uhm… Where did we first meet?”

Billy: “A pie eating contest here?”

Martha: “Hmm… That might be too easy… What pies did I make for the contest?”

Billy: “Wha- I don’t know!? How am I supposed to remember that??”

Martha: “Okay… Too hard. How about you tell me something only you would’ve known about a fourteen year old me.”

Billy: “Like what?”

Martha: “Like something secret I told you.”

Billy: “Uhm… You had a crush on Elvis and said you wanted your future husband to be just like him?”

Martha: *stares before feeling herself cringe at her teenage self* “Okay, I’ll assume you’re the real Billy. Come in, bud.”

They caught up after that. They even decided to make pies together again. It was fun. You would just see them in the kitchen together talking about whatever, normally old lady stuff, and baking. Then, when Grandpa Kent came home…

Jonathan(Pa Kent): “Martha, I’m home!” *walks to the kitchen and pauses when he sees Billy and Martha*

Martha and Billy: *stare back at him*

Jonathan: “Martha is that an another grandbaby, clone, or cousin of Clark’s?”

Martha: “None of those. This is Billy. He’s a friend of mine.”

Jonathan: “Martha, you’re just befriending eight-year-olds now? Where are his parents?”

Billy: “They’re dead, mister! But don’t worry, me and Martha met back in ‘59. We go way back.”

Jonathan: *stares for a solid minute* “Wait a darn moment… were you caught up in all that Fawcett business?” *heard about it on the news*

Billy: “Yup!”

Martha: “What Fawcett business?”

That’s how Billy was led to explain the entirety of the time bubble and suspendium and all that. The Kents thankfully welcomed him with open arms. After this entire incident, Billy showing up to the farm was a regular occurrence. He could bake with Martha and help Mr. Jonathan out as much as he could on the farm. Then, one of the Kents other grandchildren showed up. (Billy was basically their grandbaby too, not that the Batson knew)

Jonathan: *trying to fix their tractor because it broke down for whatever reason*

Billy: *standing to the side, holding a toolbox and giving him tools whenever he asks*

Jon: *flies over from Metropolis* “Grandpa! Grandpa-” *does a double take when he sees Billy* “Wait, who’re you?”

Billy: “I’m Billy!”

Jonathan: “You heard him Jon. He’s Billy.”

Jon: *suddenly self-conscious of the fact that he’s flying in front of this kid and kinda just revealed his identity* “I’m uh… Jon.” *slowly floats down to land on the ground*

Billy and Jon: *stare at each other*

Jonathan: “Billy, can you pass me the diamond tip screwdriver?”

Billy: “Sure!” *passes it to him*

Yeah… Jon was a little confused as to who this random kid was. He was also a little confused as to why he refers to Jon’s grandpa has Mr. Jonathan but refers to Jon’s grandma as Martha. Did he live with grandma and grandpa? Is he another one of his dad’s cousins? Jon doesn’t think the boy’s a kryptonian but he might be wrong. Anyways, he’s making everything weird! Though it’s a sort of good kind of weird? His grandma is acting… younger? They also keep referencing things Jon has no idea about. (Late 50s pop culture) The kid- Billy, seems nice enough though. He has no problems playing with Jon so that’s awesome! Jon is so happy to have a friend away from home, but he’s still confused as to why Billy is at the farm.

Jon: “Dad, why do some people live on farms?”

Supes: “Because they’re farmers…?”

Jon: “No, but like what if they aren’t farmers, and they just help the farmers that are already there? Like one day they just showed up and decided to help around.”

Supes: “Well, I guess the closest thing you’re looking for would be a farmhand. Why are you asking?”

Jon: “Well, there’s this kid that lives with grandma and grandpa now-”

Supes: “WHAT?!”

Yeah, neither Ma Kent or Pa Kent have told Clark about this. It kind of slipped their minds.

Bonus interactions:

Before Pa Kent Came Home…

Billy: “Who’s that?” *looking at a photo of Pa and Ma Kent together*

Martha: “My husband.”

Billy: “Husband…?” *suddenly sad he missed a bunch of stuff from Martha’s life* “Oh…”

Martha: You sound upset. What’s wrong?

Billy: “Nothing.”

Twenty Years Ago When Clark Was Still a Kid…

Supes: Ma, who’s that? *looking at a photo of a nine year old Billy and a fourteen year old Martha*

Martha: “Oh, that’s Billy and I.”

Supes: “Who’s Billy?”

Martha: “An old friend of mine. He uhm… disappeared one day. I don’t know what happened to him.”

[nosyp]

Hii could we possibly get a smut w Cho Hyun-Ju x f!reader where were basically a person who loves to joke around n chill w everybody else but when it comes to Hyun, we get all distracted, stutter around her, n js listen to everything she says not even realizing that we have a crush on her until someone brings it up n were like “oh crap wtf im being weak😥” which causes us to avoid her n be in denial of having feelings cuz we wanna seem focused n nonchalant which everyone notices especially her n that causes her to corner us n lead to smth spicy? Pls n thank u!!

THIS IS SO GOOOODDDD!! I'm so sorry but errrr I'm trying to figure myeslf out rn so not much smut 😔😔😔😔😔

Title = Flustered and Fallen

Warnings = mdni, kissing, touching, smut interrupted by guard sorry hehe🥺

Pairing = Cho Hyun Ju x fem!reader

Summary = You're confident around everyone, except Hyun-Ju. When you realize you have feelings for her, you start avoiding her. But Hyun-Ju won't let you hide anymore, and things get more intense when she corners you one day.

Word count = 1.5k

You were the kind of person who could easily get along with just about anyone. Your relaxed attitude and carefree nature made you a natural at making friends. A well-timed joke here, a playful comment there, everyone loved how effortlessly you could lighten the mood. The other players would often gravitate toward you, laughing at your banter or joining in on the fun. You could talk about anything and everything, and no matter the chaos of the games, your personality never once changed. But that was before she came into the picture.

It started to shift when Player 120, Hyun-Ju, entered the room. At first, you told yourself it was nothing. She was just another player, just another person to interact with. But then, it happened. The moment her gaze met yours, something inside you flipped and you found yourself stumbling over your words, losing track of sentences mid-conversation. Where you usually spoke effortlessly, now you fumbled, feeling like an idiot each time she looked at you.

"H-hey," you tried to joke, but instead it came out broken up and stuttered. "Don't te… tell me you're gonna– gonna be the quiet one in this group? You got–gotta keep up with all the st– stuff happening! Or else you'll be left behind."

But as soon as she turned her head toward you, her lips curling into the faintest of smiles, you suddenly felt heat rush to your face. Why was this so hard? Why was your usual confidence suddenly evaporating?

"Maybe I'm just waiting for you to catch up," she teased, her voice calm yet somehow sent shivers up your spine.

You tried to laugh it off, but all you could manage was a nervous chuckle, blinking awkwardly as you avoided her gaze. It was her. Her presence. It made everything feel different. You’d quickly become aware of how much you started paying attention to the way she spoke, the way her posture shifted. Every time she moved, you couldn't stop watching her.

Even when you were surrounded by others, your mind would drift back to her. You'd notice how effortlessly she handled herself in the games, how she made every action seem so smooth, and how you couldn't seem to focus when she was near. Unlike the playful, relaxed version of yourself you showed everyone else, with Hyun-Ju, you were clumsy. Awkward even. You couldn’t even make eye contact for more than a second without feeling your chest tighten.

One day, after another awkward moment where you fumbled a sentence in front of her, your friend nudged you with a grin. "You good, [Y/N]?" he asked, eyeing your flushed face. "You look like you're about to pass out every time Hyun-Ju speaks."

"Wh-what?" you stammered, shaking your head. "I'm fine, just—" You trailed off, trying to brush it off like it was nothing. You glanced at Hyun-Ju quickly, who was talking to someone else. The sight of her made your heart race again.

She raised an eyebrow, clearly not buying your act. "Come on, I’ve never seen you act like this before. You’ve got a thing for her, don’t you?"

Your throat went dry, and you could feel your heart start to pound harder. "No, no! I don’t—" you sputtered, but it was too late. The realization hit you like a ton of bricks, hard. You did. You had a crush on Hyun-Ju. You weren’t sure when it happened, but now that it had settled in your mind, it was all you could think about. Your attempts to deny it only made things worse, making you avoid her more.

It didn’t take long for others to start noticing, either. You went out of your way to be anywhere but near Hyun-Ju, trying to appear uninterested. But every time she walked into the room, you found yourself stiffening, words faltering, and cool exterior melting.

“[Y/N]?” a voice cut through your thoughts. It was Hyun-Ju’s voice, calm as usual. You froze, immediately standing up to look anywhere but at her. “Everything okay?”

You forced a smile, trying your best to act like you were just as unaffected as you always had been. "Yeah, just—just thinking."

But Hyun-Ju was no fool. She saw right through your act, and a smirk tugged at her lips. "You’ve been acting strange lately. Is it something I did?" Her tone was teasing, but there was something in her eyes that made you shiver, an unreadable look that seemed to look straight through you.

Your heart raced, and your mouth went dry. “I— uh— I’m fine," you managed, turning away quickly to avoid her gaze. You didn’t know how to handle this. You didn’t want to admit it, but being near her made you feel weak, and you hated it. You hated how powerless she made you feel.

Hyun-Ju seemed to notice your discomfort, and the intensity in her eyes shifted. There was a hint of amusement now, mixed with something else. Something more dangerous. She leaned closer, her voice dropping low. 

“You can’t hide it forever, you know. I know what you’re feeling, and I don’t mind.” Her breath was warm against your ear, and your breath caught in your throat. Then she got even closer. “In fact, I actually like it.”

Your heart skipped a beat. It was too much. Too intense. You needed to get away.

“I’m just... I’m just focused on the game,” you stammered, attempting to walk away quickly. But Hyun-Ju’s hand caught your wrist, her grip firm but not painful. “Don't think you can run away from this, [Y/N]. Not now.”

And in that moment, you realized you were in deep. She wasn’t going to let you pretend any longer.

—

Fuck. How did you get into this situation? Somehow you were now sharing a stall with her.

“I– I– don’t know why I act weird around you okay?!” you say, trying to give excuses for your weird behaviour. 

“You sure? Everyone else seems to notice and you know why.” she says, continuing to pressure you for answers. “I’m not here for your excuses.”

You felt the walls closing in on you, heart racing in your chest. Her gaze was unrelenting, eyes narrowing as she stepped closer, her presence so overwhelming it made your breath get stuck in your throat.

"I–I don't know what you want me to say..." you stammer, feeling your confidence slowly slipping away under her intense stare. The space between you two was so tight now, your skin prickling with the closeness.

"You don't know?" she murmured, her voice soft but with an edge that made your body tense. "You really don't know why you're acting like this?"

You couldn't meet her gaze. You wanted to look away, to step back, but your feet seemed frozen to the ground. She moved again, just an inch from you now, her breath warm against your ear as she whispered, "I think you do."

Her hand brushed against yours, fingers barely grazing your skin, and you couldn't stop the shiver that ran down your spine. The heat between you two was almost suffocating, and every inch of your body screamed to close the gap.

But instead, you froze. What was she waiting for? What did she expect from you?

Your eyes were starting to hurt, maybe from the light above, maybe from the tears you were holding back. You didn’t know. 

Your thoughts were quickly interrupted by a pair of lips suddenly being pressed against yours. The kiss was so tender… so loving. Were you going crazy? Maybe you were. Involuntarily, you leaned into the kiss, further deepening it, letting you taste her tongue as she tasted yours. Then, she pulled away, ending your sweet moment.

"You're not like the others, y’know…" she murmured, her voice low and soft. With every single word, you felt like you were going even crazier. "You make me want to do things I haven’t done in a long time."

Your heart skipped a beat at her words. Was she… was she admitting something? Or was this another game? You couldn’t be sure, but the way she looked at you told you everything you needed to know.

"I…" Your voice cracked, the words slipping out of your mouth before you could stop them. "I don’t know what it is about you, but I can’t stop thinking about you." you finally admitted. 

She only lets out a chuckle until she lets her lips crash onto yours again. She sucks, nibbles on your lip as her hands roam around your body. The warmth of her touch was solicitous, showing how much she loved you. 

Almost automatically, you started leaning into her touch more, eager to feel more of her. The heat in your body gradually increases the more you feel her fingertips dragging around your body.  

Then– the door slams open and reveals a pink guard. Fuck no.

“Player 120. Player [number]. Come out. Time is up.”

[ggidolsmuts]

Secret Weapons - Won Ji-an

TW: Potential spoilers for Squid Game 2! Leave if you haven't watched it.

"Hnngh! Ah! No! Fuck! You asshole!" You're in bed, on top of Ji-an, her hands on your chest, trying to stop you. You have a hand on her neck, and with the other you're stabbing her, pressing your fist into her neck, slowing down right before you actually make contact.

"Fuck, you think I look easy? Die die die die you fuck!" you recite the lines, not stopping until she has her eyes closed, a grin breaking out across her face. "Hey, you're supposed to be spurting blood and dying, not smiling."

"You sound too funny like that."

"Well sorry, I don't tell my girlfriend to die all that often."

"I should hope not." She pulls you close, humming as you nip at her neck. "We should do one more run through the script."

"I'll just do it like this." You continue kissing up and down her neck, and when you find a spot that makes her shiver, you suck on it hard, nipping on it hard enough to make it sting and leave a mark.

"Ow!" Ji-an shoots a hand up there, and she finds a small red line on her fingertip. "I'm bleeding!"

"It's a very tiny nip, just slap a bandage on it later."

"Why did you do that! Now I have to get makeup and stuff over it!"

"So they know not to touch you there." Ji-an's mouth drops open as you slide a thigh between hers. "Because this is what happens." You push it up against the apex of her thighs, feeling just how wet she is and watching her squirm.

"Ah…"

"One more run through the script, you said?"

"Just shut up and get in me." She kisses you, tugging on your lower lip not too gently as she works your boxers down. You slide her drenched panties down her legs, and easily you slip into her, both of you gasping at the sensation. You and Ji-an engage in wordless passion, her eyes glassy and dazed as you pump into her, moaning with every dip of your hips against hers. You place a hand over her neck, right over the spot where you nipped her earlier, and she tightens around you substantially.

"God!" Her head lolls back, keening into your hand, and you keep at it, massaging and palming that spot, and Ji-an's mind is in a haze of pleasure, like you're overriding all coherent thought. Her nails dig into your back, pulling you closer and whimpering as she wraps her legs around you. "It feels so good!" she squeals before shutting her eyes, letting her orgasm take over. You groan as she tightens around you significantly, but she has the wherewithal to tap your shoulder.

"W-Wait! Don't cum!" She shivers as the last few waves wash through her, but you do manage to listen to her, breathing heavily as you hold off your own.

"What?"

"Two seconds!" Wobbly-legged she hurries to the bathroom before coming back out. Before you can say anything she's back on the bed, kneeling to take you in her mouth. Your moan is hitched as you feel something cold on the underside of your shaft. You can see the smile in her eyes at your reaction, and she sucks you even more vigorously, her tongue twirling around your shaft.

"God Ji-an, what—" She pulls back, all the way to the tip, and with only your head between her lips she moves it back back and forth, the hard and cold friction going straight up your spine. With a loud moan you buck your hips and cum. Ji-an keeps her tongue over your head, playing with your tip as she collects your load. You shiver as she keeps her lips around your shaft, the coldness on the underside persistent as she pulls back with deliberate slowness.

She's smiling again at you, this time with a lip ring right in the middle.

"What is that?"

"Lip ring, part of my look for the show." She smiles and takes it off easily. "Thought it might be interesting."

"I'll say, make sure you get to keep it after you're done filming."

"They'll definitely let me keep it if I tell them what I used it for."

"You're horrible!" You cuddle her after getting all your clothes back in their right places. "Make sure you die fast."

"Wow and I'm the horrible one?"

"In the show, so we can spend more time together! You gotta let me finish."

"Oh I will, I have the secret weapon now." You massage the freshly patched up spot on Ji-an's neck, chuckling as she squirms and twitches.

"That makes two of us."

A/N: Something short for her, kinda like my Jung Hoyeon one from Squid Game 1 lol, she is mad pretty and charming, both her and Park Gyu-young (No-eul). Of course there's Jo Yuri also but i'll write her some other time. Thanks for reading!

[cherie-doll]

Helloo >_< I hope ur having a good dayy, I was just wondering if you could do like a curly-haired reader with the cod men? :p stuff like helping reader w their routines, if the reader straightens it, or like just how they feel abt it? wtv you find easier to write!

- 🦇 (reserving an anon, hope thats all good! :3)

yay another anon reserved! ...wish i hadn't damaged my curly hair with three keratin treatments and straightening it like daily, it thinned out and the curls aren't consistent :/

⋆⋆Price, Ghost, Soap, Gaz, Roach, Alejandro, Rudy, Phillip Graves, Makarov, Keegan, König, Horangi, Nikto

Curly-Haired!Reader x COD Men

« Price...

he adores your hair in its natural state, even if you've constantly fried it by straightening it and think it's too frizzy now, there's nothing more that he loves than settling into bed after a long and hard day and spooning you, nuzzling his face into your neck and smelling the oil you've massaged into your hair

you mention how your curls seem to scratch at his face instead of caressing but he doesn't care, he's happy this way, on mornings he sleeps in and wakes up to immediately feel you still close to him and play with your hair

he doesn't care if it's messy, having slipped out of your bonnet, he loves the unruliness of it even if you don't, you complain about how you don't wake up to luscious locks or smooth straight hair, how constantly you have to hydrate it, but he just nods listening to you because he really does love it

« Ghost...

you think he couldn't care less about your hair but secretly he's admired it,

one day when you're tired of the routine of dealing with your hair you say you're going to cut it all off, get a really short haircut because you just can't deal with it anymore, Simon turns around real fast when he hears that

firmly says no, he doesn't want you cutting your hair, you have no idea how comforting it so for him to feel it when he's sitting on the living room couch, fast asleep and feeling your breath on his face as you lean over to place a kiss on his cheek

and those rare moments when your curls turn out nice he's the first to notice it, he doesn't really say much about it and you're wondering why he keeps staring at you; he's silently admiring them

« Soap...

the one who might be a little obnoxious about it, like he's the first one to notice when you straighten it, or of you leave it natural or do anything with it

since you're active and like to be busy doing things, you tie your hair up or keep it from falling onto your face with a hair bandana, he prefers to see you with your hair loose and will go pulling at your hair tie or whatever is keeping it together just to see it come down, he's able to get away before you can catch him

will stare at you with hearts in his eyes as you're fighting your hair, trying to get it to stay in a specific style but those difficult stands just won't keep down

« Gaz...

man is the one you yell for when it's hair wash day and you're already in the shower but forgot to bring your comb, it's a very specific one out of the set you own

you yell for him to hand you the brush but you own a ton, so he's holding up a different brush and every time you say it's not the one you need he has to go back to looking for another one and guessing which of the two he found could be the one

he also helps you apply cream to your hair, making sure it's evenly applied and hydrated, helps you untangle the knots in the back

« Roach...

he can't help but feel a little disappointed when he wanders into the bedroom to see you on the floor with a mirror, two different brushes/combs, hair claws and a straightener

you've been at it for almost two hours and you still need to apply oil to make the ends look less dry, all that and your arms hurt, soon as you see him you're making him help you divide your hair into sections to make sure you don't miss any curls that get away

it irks you when someone asks about your hair type and you can't say curly because they expect kinky, tightly coiled from root to end and don't understand that there's different types so you always respond with "damaged" lol

« Alejandro...

his hair gel seems to hold up better than yours does, so every time you do your hair you steal some of his and he wonders why he's having to go to the store so often to buy new gel

you probably shed a lot of hair, which often makes you question as to if you're finally going bald but that's just new hair coming in, Alejandro has to frequently shake out the blankets for any more knots of hair

he knows how insecure you can sometimes get when your hair doesn't curl perfectly but he reminds you how beautiful you really look, he also knows you being very particular about your routine so he tries to work around that, making plans for days you're likely to be less stressed about your hair

« Rudy...

knows how adamant you are to sticking to your washing routine, he knows the entire ritual you do every morning and night when styling your hair and then getting ready for bed, he won't move or change any products sitting on the bathroom counter or in the shower knowing you'll be using them

he's even changed out the pillowcases for silk ones instead because he read somewhere that those are just sm better for any hair type, he keeps your bonnets, hair claws and stuff you use for your hair organized and tidy, he cleans your brushes frequently and will go to pick up more hair product, just make sure you send him a pic or else he might get the wrong one

loves smelling your hair right after you've washed it because you apply the best smelling oils and creams and he can't resist doing so

« Phillip Graves...

he sometimes walks in to find you applying strange things into your hair... like the time he found you putting chia seeds on your hair after you had just washed it and was still wet, "you just washed it, why are-" "it's good for my hair"

the thing is when you apply some of these you have to let your hair sit and dry naturally, so it can be well past midnight and it's still not dry yet and he'll come get you looking all sleepy, squinting his eyes at the light you have turned on nagging for you to come to bed with him already

he loves it when you grow out your hair, despite it taking a lot longer to wash and such, likes to run his hair over your hair, careful not to tangle his fingers in because he'd disrupt it

whenever he sees an ad or commercial for something advertised towards those with curly hair he asks if you'd like to have it

« Makarov...

you never realized it but he goes into the bathroom after you're done doing your hair and looks at the products and stuff you've used, he keeps a tab on how much product you have left

so when you run out one morning he comes in and places a new bottle of that hair cream you so desperately need in your hand; how convenient

he lets you do whatever you want with your hair but he's prefer id you let it be, not that he hates to see you straighten your hair but you can notice him smiling a little when your curls turn out perfect, but you know how difficult that is

so he reluctantly hands over his card when you tell him you're going to a hair salon to get it straightened, he just tells you to make sure you booked the appointment with the nicest hairstylist you could find, he doesn't want them ruining your hair

« Keegan...

would it be funny if i told you he didn't know your hair was curly because you always straightened it until once he knocked on your door late at night when you hadn't styled it and he was taken slightly aback at the sight of your hair curling and framing your face

he says he wants to see you with your natural hair more often, but he doesn't know how long that'll take, with how long you've been straightening your hair there's a lot of damage to deal with before you get your curl pattern back, sometimes you get really frustrated but you remember how expensive those keratin treatments are and get right back to applying another hair mask

but he likes pulling at your hair watching if it'll coil again even if it annoys you

« König...

you've doted on him so much before he'd love to do the same for you, you don't like him messing around the kitchen much but he knows how much time it takes you to wash, comb, and dry your hair so he'd like to help you for once

he doesn't always know how to handle your hair so he sticks to massaging your scalp which does help you relax a lot, he used to want curls when he was younger, or at least some sort of wave in his hair but now he keeps his hair pretty short so he doesn't really think about that anymore like he used to

when cuddling in bed or sitting with you on the couch he always gets the temptation of just grabbing a fistful of your hair and scrunching the curls like he sees you do, instead he gently plays with a curl, twirling it around his finger

« Horangi...

couples taking showers together is always romanticized until you're cursing in there while trying to get the comb though a difficult knot, and while he's done washing in what seems like five or ten minutes it takes you much longer than that just to shampoo and condition your hair

he looks at you weirdly for using dish soap to really work that grease and oil buildup out of your hair before rinsing it off and washing again with shampoo, you recommend he try it especially since he's got fine hair and he ends up using it now

you tell him you're going out to get your hair cut and when you come back it looks the same... he asks if you even went to the hair salon and you say you did but it was only a trim and then you mention how much they charged you for snipping off a couple of inches...

« Nikto...

you're always complaining about how late it is and your hair hasn't dried yet, he doesn't understand why you don't just use the hair dryer, it still works after all

how to explain to him that drying it RIGHT after you've washed it will make it look like a lion's mane and have the texture of a horse's mane, "just brush it" URGHGHRH you wanna strangle him, the amount of hair cream and oil you'd have to apply will make you run out of product

and when you finally decide to go dry it and he's wondering why it's been 20 mins and you're still in there, he walks in to see you still drying it, he asks why you're not done yet and you tell him it's not fully dry, "looks dry to me" you have to take his hand and shove it to where your nape/back of your head is because that's still really damp

[damthosefandoms]

“Will you stop it?”

Darry’s temper is like a bruise you don’t remember how you got. Sodapop just can’t help but press down on it, just to see what happens. And every single time, like clockwork, the pain comes—and so does Darry’s anger.

Soda just has to tap his pencil against the table one more time, and he laughs a little as he does, a little laugh that Darry knows all too well. It drives him nuts. Their father calls it an “instigator giggle.” He says it runs in the family. Darry swears that he, personally, has never laughed like that in his entire life, but oh, oh does it get on his last nerve when he hears it come out of Soda’s mouth.

The grin, the laugh, and Darry reaches over and smacks his brother’s hand so hard the pencil goes flying. Soda screeches in some mix of amusement and pure, unadulterated fear, an indescribable feeling that only successfully annoying your older brother to the point he has no choice but to retaliate can bring, and then jumps up from the table like a dog who heard the word “walk.” He’s got a crazed look in his eyes, hiding behind his chair, and Darry gets up too—Soda laughs and takes a step back as Darry takes two forward, and then the little shit is bolting down the hall and Darry only doesn’t catch up to him because Ponyboy’s appeared in the doorway, complaining he’s missing all the funny stuff, again.

Soda hides behind his locked bedroom door and laughs so hard he cries. Dad comes home later and asks why Soda’s homework isn’t done, why everything’s still laid out on the kitchen table and why he nearly slipped on a pencil walking in the door. Darry’s up in arms and Soda’s giggling like a maniac and Pony whines they left him out again, and all is right in the world.

[olderthannetfic]

On the topic of the ao3 ship stats thing, I would also like to call into question the inclusion of the "Race" category and how races are being categorized and if they should be included at all.

The first thing is that I see Latino is considered a race, but I believe Latino is moreso a cultural/ethnic category and not a race. It makes it more interesting that Afrolatino is separate from Latino, since it means that everyone categorized as Latino could be white Latino characters and therefore not as racially diverse as the category seems to imply? Or something?

Same goes for the Asian category- wouldn't it make sense to separate it into East/South East/South Asian at least since Asia is massive. Especially since it would be interesting to see the % of Asian representation that is taken up by East vs. South East Asians, given that K-pop, anime, Chinese BL, and Thai BL are all very popular.

I don't think that it's a bad thing to include a race category when taking into account this data, but the fact that these racial categories seem to be arbitrarily decided makes it less reliable in my opinion. Also what about characters who are mixed race, or mixed ethnic heritage?

In some ways, I think it would be more interesting to categorize the origin of the media/source material for these ships. How much of the chart is taken up by Korean origin ships (i.e. K-pop groups) vs. Japanese origin ships (i.e. anime) vs. American origin ships (i.e. American movies and TV)? It would also a valuable insight since I would expect something like Thai BL to have all or majority Asian characters. So in some ways, the race category is more insightful into the diversity of American/UK/Canadian/etc. media. It would also be interesting to see how much of the Asian characters are coming from Asian media/music groups.

This is not to say that analyzing the racial/ethnic/cultural backgrounds of characters in the most popular ships wouldn't give insights. I think it would be interesting to see how this changes over time. But I think that if we want the data about racial discrepancies and diversity to be meaningful, the categorization must be consistent and done with more care.

--

Lulu seems like a nice person, but she is a dumbass about Asian media. She told me once that she was shocked the year BTS suddenly popped up all over the top ships.

Like... really? You were shocked? And you literally had never heard of BTS? As a fandom researcher? If that had been 2013, sure, fine, but it very much wasn't.

This isn't even about being Western-centric because shittons of fans in the UK and US are into Asian fandoms. (UK because that's where she's from. US because that's the place we all wank about being centered all the time.) This is just a basic failure of a lot of meta writers and even academics who study fandom.

Part of why people insist on staying this dumb is that acknowledging Asian media, particularly live action stuff, makes it obvious that the real issue is how the media handles characters. Fans who were all about the white guys all the time still fell hard for Wangxian.

Clearly, fandom has no problem attaching to nonwhite characters when they are the unmarked ethnic majority leads in something. So the supposed failings of fic might be about skin color or antiblackness specifically, or they might really be about the failings of media when it either fails to include certain characters or sidelines and others the ones it does have.

Those conclusions aren't as tidy and don't make as good a tire iron to club other fans with.

[ju-nebugg]

moments from trb that make me lose my mind (pt. 2)

- “once your balls drop, that beard’ll come in great. like a fucking rug. you eat soup, it’ll filter out the potatoes. terrier style. do you have hair on your legs? i’ve never noticed.” ronan lynch i love you so much

- ronan panicking and letting the mask slip when gansey was staring down that wasp

- ronan being jealous that gansey was leaving henrietta with adam and saying “do you not want me to come” and gansey responding with “i would take all of you anywhere with me”

- “the sky as blue as death above him” like WHAT

- “i didn’t realize that ‘midget’ was the adam parrish type” ronan your yearning is showing

- gansey’s smile being “complicated” when he notices adam and blue holding hands

- “…blue’s dress had gotten hitched up and gansey could see a long, slender triangle of her thigh. adam’s hand was braced a few inches away on the seat, knuckles pale with his hatred of flying. there was nothing particularly intimate about the way they sat, but something about the scene made gansey feel strange, like he’d heard an unpleasant statement and later forgotten everything about the words but the way they had made him feel.” (long quote i know but holy fucking shit)

- obligatory “i’m always straight.” “oh, man, that’s the biggest lie you’ve ever told.”

- gansey doing his little indie film main character scream to god in a field

- gansey pointing at people. so much pointing. what a dork. i love him so much

- also his vocabulary. what a NERD <333333

- ronan pissing all over the state of virginia

- gansey calling blue “the table everyone wants at starbucks”

- “i just fed chainsaw but she’ll need it again.” “this,” gansey replied, “is precisely why i didn’t want to have a baby with you.”

- adam’s immediate thought when holding blue’s hand is to worry about crushing her fingers :(

- ronan forgetting to be “cool or surly” when translating cabeswater’s latin, and apologizing over and over again good lord and gansey only responding with “it’s okay, you’re doing really well”

- the whole “coincidence because it wasn’t” trend

- gansey being SO NERVOUS to ask blue to hang out at the church, and then sounding “fourteen shades brighter” when she accepts

- gansey’s arms being super fucking ripped from rowing and blue Noticing

- “aquamarine is a wonderful color, and i won’t be made to feel bad for wearing it”

- “gansey’s voice, when he replied, was a little rough. ‘well, if you killed adam, i’d be quite upset.’”

- “on the inside, he sort of wished he looked more like the camaro. which was to say, more like adam.”

- gansey planning out his “cunning thing to say to blue when he saw her next”

- ronan walking in on adam and blue flirting and immediately shoving chainsaw in their faces. hm.

- “no matter how hard he tried, he kept becoming a gansey”

- “out of the blue?” “i’d prefer if you didn’t use that expression.”

- BUTTERNUT

- blue being reluctantly attracted to gansey’s glasses

- ronan trying so hard to give adam an excuse not to go home, and then going absolutely apeshit when adam gets hurt

- neeve’s voice sounding like a “computerized voicemail menu” (can you tell i’m in love with maggie’s descriptors)

- “gansey was just a guy with a lot of stuff and a hole inside him that chewed away more of his heart every year.” oh god

- ronan carrying all of adam’s possessions into monmouth on his back

- gansey saying things like “excelsior” and “yee haw” for no one but himself

- gansey being miserable and blue liking him better that way

- ‘“crushed and broken,” gansey said. “just the way women like ‘em.”’ correct!

- “cabeswater was just as literal as ronan was” HMMMMMMMMM CURIOUS

- ronan writing “remembered” on the red mustang and walking away without a word shut UPPPPPP

- ganseys first question after adam sacrifices himself being “was i so awful?”

- “they didn’t even have the authority to choose an alcoholic beverage. they couldn’t be deciding who deserved to live or die.”

(pt. 1)

as soon as i can stumble my way to a bookstore, dream thieves will be annotated to hell and back. expect more yelling very soon <3

[tarotofhope]

You can apply the below observations to both, your vedic and western charts. I'm not generalizing anything or anyone, these are just my random personal observations, don't let it ruin your day or week(for some people).

Note: I've noticed that some people were arguing in the comment section, when I posted part 1 of these astro observations. Please don't do that. If you do not agree, just ignore the post and move on, don't come fighting and arguing in the comment section saying, "We are not like this, we are not like that." I don't understand, those are not fixed opinions, definitions or judgements neither am I pointing out fingers at someone specific, so please do not take it personally. If it is something positive, people always come and accept easily then why not the negative stuff? Astrology is vast and people are complex. So many combinations or placements explain so many things, but it may not apply to everyone. Even I do not resonate with some observations(positive and negative, both) but I do not go bursting out in the comment section. If people won't observe and find common points between placements/signs, then tell me how else would people study astrology? Those observations are not written after just observing 1 or 2 people. If any of your placements are mentioned and you do not resonate with it, then you might have some other placements which make you an exception, don't take it to heart. If you have so much problem then don't read observations, only read tarot.

☾✴ The more Aries/Scorpio/1st House placements you have in the big 6, the more aggressive, assertive, impulsive and impatient you are.

☾✴ Sun conjunct Mars in the 4th House placement will give the native a profession/passion their father won't like and support of, there will be strong resentment and disapproval from his side.

☾✴ Aquarius sun people are misunderstood personalities and they either have a huge friend circle or they like to be alone, nothing in between.

☾✴ Capricorn Sun people are so attracted to the mystical and magnetic scorpios, they love their aura and energy. Same goes with Aries and Scorpios too. Capricorn Sun people also adore kind and generous people.

☾✴ People with dominant earth placements have a stable long term profession and/or more than one property in their name. They mostly leave some legacy behind if they're popular and famous, people respect them a lot and they have many loyal fans and admirers. To mention a few: Elvis Presley, Beyoncé, Michael Jackson, Adele, Ratan Tata, Gurdas Maan, A.R. Rahman.

☾✴ Now, this is very specific, I can't sit still if I don't mention this. When Sagittarius Sun singers and composers break up with someone, they create the biggest hit number after that. That song gets to the top in the charts. For example: Taylor Swift and Miley Cyrus. I love how these natives quickly reach a glow up after a huge blow up, maybe this happens because it hits them hard when they soon realize that their life and peace of mind is much more precious and they shouldn't waste it on someone who's not worth it.

☾✴ Ketu/South Node in the 5th house/7th house, Ketu conjunct Venus/Saturn/Moon will make the native less or not at all interested in having children and/or romantic relationships. These people have their focus on other things in life such as self growth, career, ambition, passion and so on.(If these people have strong martian placements then they would want intimate relationships or marriage but no children.)

☾✴ Leo, Taurus, Capricorn and Aries Sun men have veiny hands and arms.

Love, light, peace & hope to you🌸🍁🌻🌼

Thank you so much for being here. I post PAC & Astrology Observations. Do love and support by reblogging, liking or following.

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[sturnslutz]

genesis.

well well well chris and rosy ... yk. smut and a bit of angst (???) lol. one use of y/n.

things have been tough for chris after rosy cut him off completely. last time he's felt like this was when... nevermind. we don't talk about her.

rosy's been okay. she's been focusing her time more on school work and sports and even tried out for the soccer team! she hasn't got the email yet, but she's somewhat confident she made it. what she didn't know was, chris was on the bleachers watching her play.

he didn't initially plan to come watch her, but he got finished with his classes today and didn't want to go back to the intoxicating environment of his frat house. so he decided to smoke a couple blunts and wait till dark to leave the bleachers to go back.

it was until he glanced up noticing the many girls running out onto the field that he noticed you. you looked completely normal. while he was over here a mess, over something he caused.

he didn't expect you to be so cheery and energetic when you were practicing, noting how what happened was 8 days ago. he was happy you moved on, but couldn't help but feel the emptyness in his heart.

if he still even had one.

he knew he shouldn't feel this way, but you had him wrapped around your finger. he wasn't filled with romantic feelings, no of course not, he doesn't fuck with that shit.

maybe it was the way you looked at him, or the way you moaned his name out.

when he noticed you looking around while taking your break, he gathered his stuff and quickly made his way down the bleachers and went home.

you haven't thought much about what happened. it didn't really affect you. you knew it hurt a piece of you, but a very tiny piece. not something you could really notice without a microscope.

truly, the only reason you got so "upset" was because you were drunk out of your mind and you were horny. and because he lied. besides that, you didn't give a fuck if chris fucked some other girl. you've fucked plenty, why can't he?

you heard from vey and matt how "broken" chris was and you scoffed at the fact, shrugging. "not m'fault he caught feelings." you let out a dry laugh as you mock chris.

oh boy, only if chris knew how much you didn't care. but deep down, you cared a teeny bit. maybe that's the weed talking, it couldn't be real.

chris didn't care either about what happened. he mainly cared about the look on your face you had. he knew you didn't care, but he could see right through your barbed wires. you were hurt, he knew it and so did you.

were you guys going to admit it? hell no.

that was until chris came banging on your door.

"y/n open the fuck up." he couldn't bother using your nickname. he couldn't wait.

you rolled your eyes at the voice, closing your books and laptop, adjusting your glasses as you walk over to the door.

"yes?" you say, leaning against the doorframe.

"fuck it."

those two words quickly turning into a heated kiss and chris pushed the two of you inside, shutting the door with his foot as you wrapped your arms around his neck and legs around his waist.

he brought you to your bed, laying you down carefully as he threw his shirt off with no hesitation and you did the same. he took your glasses off, setting them down on your desk and more clothes came off, falling to the floor.

"fuck. missed you." he says through breaths as he kissed down your chest, rubbing your body as he does so. "fuck outta here with that bull. know you didn't, and i didn't either. no need to lie, chris." you said as you ran your right hand through his hair, never breaking your gaze with his dark ocean eyes.

he rolls his eyes at this, not putting an argument up as he reaches down into his jean pocket, taking out his wallet and putting it on his hard length that he's been pumping in front of your aching heat.

he wasted no time, sliding into you as he massaged your breasts while doing so, your moans becoming music to his ears. the headboard slamming, a clear indicator of what was happening right next door to your dear neighbors. welp.

"fuck, take it, rosy." his pace grows faster as he reaches his hand down to your clit, the pad of his thumb rubbing you furiously.

your moans grow louder as you grip your hand around his wrist, rubbing your soft fingers over his veins that were popping out. "m' close!" you say, drool spilling down the corners of your mouth as your eyes close shut as he smirks, drilling into you faster, making it his "sorry" for his actions.

"me too, wan' me to cum in you?" you nod as you clench around him, your back arching off the warm comforter, pornographic moans bouncing off the walls as he groans, halting his movements as he buries himself in you, warm spurts of white rope filling your guts.

once he was finished, he pulled out slowly, resting his dick on your clit as he watches your releases spill out of you as he collects it onto your middle finger, sticking it into your mouth, which you happily sucked off.

he pulled his finger out of your mouth with a pop as he reached to your paper towels on your desk, wiping you and himself off as he slid back on his boxers and walked to your dresser, finding you a fresh pair of panties and a new shirt and helped you put them back on.

once you got tucked in, watching his movements, he picked up your clothes and put them in your hamper, and grabbed your stanley and held the straw up to your lips muttering a soft, "drink."

once you finished drinking, he set the bottle on the table and started putting his clothes back on. "y'can stay, chris." you say softly, looking up at him. he looks back at you, his face softening, and unbuckled his jeans again, climbing into your bed, wrapping his arm around your waist and burying his face in your neck.

you both fell into a deep sleep without another word. vey is going to be so mad when she finds out.

@muwapsturniolo @tyummyz @m4ttg1rl @lovergirl4gracieabrams @sturniqlo @lypsiiii @emely9274 @shadowthesim @mattsobvimyfav @sturnl0ve @wastelandzella @fallininlust @chrisslut04 @sophand4n4 @vainilladollie @slutforchrissturniolo2 @ncm9696 @snoopychris @sofieeeeex @chr0mehrts comment to be added or removed.

[dulcescorderitas]

𝓴𝓲𝓭𝓼?

you’re nursing a beer, your legs pulled up to sit cross-legged as you lean back on your palms. dean’s beside you, his own bottle dangling loosely in his fingers. his knee rests against yours, this simple, casual point of connection, but it’s enough to ground you. his shoulders are relaxed, his legs stretched out long, but there’s something... off. you can feel it in the way his gaze keeps drifting, how he’s not quite looking at you or anything in particular. he’s lost in his own head, and you’ve been with him long enough to know that’s rarely a good thing.

“you’ve been quiet tonight,” you say, finally breaking the silence. your voice is soft, not accusing, but the words seem to snap him out of whatever spiral he was falling into. he glances at you, his green eyes flickering in the dim light, and he huffs out a little laugh. it’s small, almost self-deprecating, and he looks away again, his jaw tightening.

“just thinkin’, sweetheart,” he murmurs, taking a swig of his beer.

you tilt your head, watching him. “about what?”

he hesitates, running his free hand through his hair, and the gesture makes your stomach tighten. whatever it is, it’s big. he’s not usually this careful about his words—dean winchester isn’t careful about much, period—but right now, he looks like a man standing on the edge of something.

“can i ask you somethin’?” he says, finally, and his voice is quieter now, more raw.

“of course,” you reply immediately, setting your beer aside. you shift closer, your knee pressing more firmly against his, your hand resting on the cool metal of the car between you. “what’s on your mind?”

he exhales slowly, staring down at the bottle in his hands. for a second, you think he’s not going to say anything. then, all at once, the words come out.

“you ever think about havin’ kids?”

the question hits you like a punch to the gut—not because it’s unwelcome, but because it’s so unexpected. you blink at him, your lips parting, and he finally looks at you, his expression guarded. like he’s bracing for you to laugh at him, or worse, to shut him down completely.

“kids?” you repeat, just to make sure you heard him right.

“yeah,” he says, his voice gruff, like the word’s hard for him to get out. “like... not right now, obviously, but... someday. you ever think about it?”

your mouth opens, then closes. you glance at him, searching his face for any clues about where this is coming from. it’s not like dean’s ever been the white-picket-fence type. hell, you’re not even sure if you’re the white-picket-fence type, given the life you lead. but there’s something in his eyes, something vulnerable and almost... hopeful, that makes your chest ache.

“i don’t know,” you say honestly. “i guess i haven’t thought about it much, with everything going on. it’s not exactly easy to picture that kind of future, you know?”

he nods, like he was expecting that answer, but there’s still this shadow of disappointment in his expression. “yeah. yeah, i get that,” he mutters, tipping back his beer for another sip.

you watch him for a moment, your mind racing. he doesn’t bring up stuff like this lightly—hell, he barely even talks about his feelings unless you pry them out of him. but this? this is something he’s been holding onto, turning over in his mind, and now he’s laid it at your feet like some kind of fragile offering.

“why are you asking?” you ask gently, leaning closer. “is this something you’ve been thinking about?”

he lets out a low laugh, but there’s no humor in it. “yeah,” he admits, running a hand down his face. “i don’t know, it’s stupid. just... sometimes i think about what it’d be like. teachin’ a kid how to throw a football. takin’ ‘em for a drive in baby when they’re old enough. tryin’ to be the kind of dad mine never was.”

the confession is raw, almost painful, and you feel it settle heavy in your chest. dean’s voice drops lower, like he’s afraid of saying it out loud. “i mean, i know it’s a pipe dream, with the way we live. but... if it ever happened, you know? with you... i think i’d want that.”

his words hang in the air between you, and your heart stutters. with you. the way he says it, so quiet, so certain, makes something twist inside you. you reach out, your fingers brushing his arm. he looks up at you, his expression cautious, like he’s waiting for you to tell him he’s crazy.

“dean,” you say softly, “you’d be an incredible dad.”

he snorts, shaking his head, but you tighten your grip on his arm, making him look at you. “i mean it,” you insist. “you’re already so good with sam, and jack... hell, you take care of everyone around you, whether you realize it or not. you’ve got more love in you than you give yourself credit for.”

his jaw clenches, and he looks away, but not before you catch the flicker of emotion in his eyes. “you really think that?” he asks, his voice barely above a whisper.

“i know it,” you say firmly, leaning in closer. “and if that’s something you want... someday... then yeah. i think i’d want that too. with you.”

his head snaps toward you, his eyes wide, and for a second, he just stares at you. then, without warning, he leans in, his hand sliding to the back of your neck as his lips crash against yours.

the kiss is desperate, messy, like he’s been holding himself back for too long and finally let the dam break. his fingers thread through your hair, holding you close as his mouth moves against yours, hot and demanding. you gasp into him, your hands grabbing at his shirt, pulling him closer, needing him like you need air.

his tongue sweeps over your bottom lip, and you open for him, letting him in. he groans into your mouth, the sound vibrating through you, and it’s like a switch flips. suddenly, you’re climbing into his lap, straddling him as his hands grip your hips, pulling you flush against him. the heat of him, the way his stubble scrapes against your skin, the sheer wantpouring off of him—it’s overwhelming in the best way.

he breaks away for a second, his forehead pressing against yours as you both catch your breath. his hands are still on your hips, holding you there like he’s afraid you’ll disappear. “you have no idea how much i love you,” he murmurs, his voice rough and low, sending shivers down your spine.

“i think i have a pretty good idea,” you tease, your lips brushing against his as you speak. he laughs softly, the sound muffled as he kisses you again, slower this time, but just as consuming.

the future might be uncertain, but right now, with dean’s arms wrapped around you, his lips on yours, you think maybe, just maybe, you’ve found something worth holding onto.

[introvertedelf]

Chrollo Lucilfer NSFW Alphabet 🕷️

Minors DNI

⛓️⛓️⛓️⛓️⛓️⛓️⛓️⛓️⛓️⛓️⛓️⛓️⛓️⛓️⛓️

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

Chrollo is such a gentleman, honestly. He’d get a warm wet rag and clean between your legs, apologizing when he bumps your sensitive clit. He def cuddles with you, too. He might even run a bath for you both to take together.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

His fav part of his body is ofc his chest/abs.

His favorite part on your body is your ass/thighs. I will die on the hill that Chrollo loves it if you’re on the chubbier side, loving the way your thick thighs and ass feel when he’s pounding into you.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

He wants to cum inside of you. Period. He doesn’t want to make a mess, and he loves the idea of marking you like that. He’d also stuff his cum back inside of you.

Btw he’s going to try to get you to squirt by fingering the hell out of your g-spot with those thick, long fingers of his 🤤

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

He literally wants to nurse on your tits. When he cuddles you, he wants to suck your nipple in his mouth, sucking on it until you can’t take it anymore. “Maybe some milk will come out of these soon for me, hmm?”

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

He’s had a few one night stands, but it’s not like he has them all the time. He’s experience enough without being a total man whore lol. He’s read a fair share of erotica books and def has picked up some techniques.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

He can’t decide between doggy style so he can slap your ass and watch it bounce and missionary with your legs on his shoulders so he can fuck you deeper.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

Chrollo is super serious. He takes love making with you very seriously.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

He trims it when it gets too long. Carpet matches the drapes. With you, he doesn’t care. You can have a full bush, a landing strip, or be completely bare. You won’t hear him complain either way.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

He’s super romantic and likes to take things slow. He might start off giving you a massage before even initiating sex.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

He would do it a couple times a week before meeting you as a way to release stress. But he never does it now, why would he? Not when he has your warm pussy to fuck.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

Dacryphilia (he gets turned on when you cry. Not when you’re sad but when he’s fucking you so good you start crying), bondage, orgasm control, choking (nothing too serious), spanking, dumbification, praise (giving and receiving), breeding. So many more. The only things he’s really opposed to is piss and shit lmao.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

In bed or in the shower. Usually just in bed tho.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

Literally anything and everything you do turns him on. He really gets excited when you come out of the shower in just a towel. Or when you’re acting all cute and innocent.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Like I said earlier, piss and shit kinks. He also doesn’t want to severely hurt you. No cutting you or anything that could really cause damage.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

Oh he 100% prefers giving. He will eat you out all night until you’re begging him to stop because your poor clit is too sensitive. And Jesus, he’s so good at it. He’s not opposed to a blowjob, but he’d rather just fuck you.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

Starts out slow and sensual, then starts pounding into you like an animal. You’ve had to tell him he’s fucking you too hard before…

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

He’s not totally in favor of them, but if you ask he’ll not hesitate to satisfy you.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

He’s not one for risk taking really, he likes to carefully plan and be safe about things. But tbh in the beginning before you were on birth control he would fill you absentmindedly.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

He can last all night, thanks to his top tier physique. You’ll tire out before he will.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

He owns tons of toys—for you. Dildos, vibrators, clamps, whips, everything. He loves to tie you up sometimes and put a vibe on your clit, making you have screaming back to back orgasms.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Chrollo is a big tease sometimes. He’ll at times when he’s busy make you ride his thigh instead, telling you “you either cum from that or not at all, darling.”

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

He grunts, moans, growls, and yes, he’ll whimper. It’s rare, but it’s so fucking hot when he does it.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

He likes when you act like a brat so he can punish you. He’s so mean when he wants to be, and he enjoys putting you over his knee.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

Oh baby boy is hung. 8”, straight, pretty cock, veins on it, a perfect slightly pink tip. 🫣

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

Higher than you’d think. He’s pushed it away for so long, focusing on his duties, but with you? He’ll fuck you every night.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

He waits for you to fall asleep always, not wanting something to happen and be unaware. He’ll cuddle you to sleep, stroking your hair or your back and pressing kisses to your temple as you do.

[sukioyakio]

“𝑰’𝒎 𝒚𝒐𝒖𝒓𝒔 𝒋𝒖𝒔𝒕 𝒂𝒔 𝒚𝒐𝒖𝒓 M𝒊𝒏𝒆”-𝑲.𝑪𝑯𝑶𝑺𝑶

An: I had to make part two of yandere choso so yea that what I’m doing here.definitely have fluff,with a lot of obsessive thinking from him and behavior,but nothing else that I’ll can add on. Part one(blurb)

Wordcount: 3,379k

I feel yandere choso would absolutely loved to spend time with you,he just a puppy for you.A quiet big puppy that for sure.

Especially when you first met him in the very last year of highschool when you both were juniors

You weren’t the most popular person in highschool nor good looking in fact you didn’t have such great friends back then if you could recall.They treated you like trash,using you whenever they needed and always dismissed you when you try to talk to them.Or in general they would treat you like some sort of pen that they can use and abandon.

but that didn’t stop you from being friends with choso;the boy that you always see alone and being teased by Other students.And always had rumors of him coming from a fuck up shelter or other shit,basically making him an outlast in highschool.

It all happened in the lunchtime when You were looking for a spot to enjoy your lunch in sunlight.You just wanted to eat in the fresh air instead of the suffocating air you have inside the big ass school.

And you stumble across him sitting against one of the trees making his appearance more hard to see due to the shadows.He was sitting with his knees close to his chest and face down and his dark chocolate hair covering his face.

You were standing there thinking if you wanted to go find somewhere else to eat or just go sit with him.You found yourself standing there for a couple a seconds before walking towards his way with a nervous smile on your face.

'Why am I acting like he’s going to kill me???' You thought to yourself as you sat down right next to him,knowing that you already made your presence known to him.

'Why can’t they just leave me alone' choso said to himself as he buries his self more then before;he thought it was his bullies that had come to bother him again.

A light touch was felt on his shoulders before he heard your voice spoke.He instantly knew that it wasn’t his usual bullies but someone new.

“Your choso right from class A5??you probably don’t know me either but I’m in the same classes as you are” you murmur as choso head started to rise up from his legs,slightly tilting his head to look at you.

His nose mark visible from the view.But also his dark eyes bags are but few inches his dark hair hit his forehead.

At the time he thought you were some sort of back up man to use him for something.And that cause his eyesbrows to pinched down on ;looking more annoyed at you than before.Giving you a glare that for sure made shivers down your spine.

Right before choso could say anything,you spoke up.

“Listen,l-listen I’m not in any of your bully bullshit stuff!?!Nor am I getting paid to be your friend or some stuff” You sprouted the words to him with such a anxious that you thought you were sweating.Making a nervous chuckle.

Choso didn’t respond to you immediately after and that kinda made you worry.But choso in the other hand was looking at you deeply for a minute.

He had some sort of feeling about you,and he kinda could tell that you wouldn’t be the lying type of person.But it didn’t mean he could truly trust you but it meant that he could give you a chance.

You look at the ground and opening your lunchbox,to the lovely view of the food that your mother had made.

“Why come sit here with me when there’s other places to eat?” Choso mutter in stern voice as he has his head high looking at you fully.

You instantly turn your head towards your,making him slightly jump up.

“I don’t know. . . I guess maybe I wanted to get to know you,since I barely talk to you before.” You replied with such a calm tone of an ocean breeze,giving a small polite smile to him.

“And that you seem lonely and in need of a friend like me . . ." You whispered lowly thinking that he wouldn’t hear you.But he did and yet he didn’t feel like saying anything about it back then.

“Mhmm” He murmurs as he see you stuffed food into your mouth like a hamster.He didn’t know he had form some sort of grin until you asked.

“What with that face?? Is there something on my face?” You inquired as you talked with a full mouth of food.Titling your head slightly.

Choso soon felt his lips were titled up in a grin but he was quick to remove that.He was quick to respond.

“Oh?it just you look like a hamster eating like that” he bruantly said up as his shifted his position into now a more comfortable position.

You were silent for a few seconds making him feel like he had done something wrong,after seeing you had put your head down.But soon after your face rises up with such a colorful smile that had the sun shining in your way making you look so.. so Astonishing.

Something about the way you smile had him feel so relaxed and he felt more alive then he had before.He knew that he wouldn’t find anything else that would make him feel like that again.

And after that He would follow you every where,in every class he would sit next to you.You were more than happy that you found someone you could talk without the need of feeling used.He was funny;well to you that is,you two would talk nonstop (well you’ll talk his ear off but he loved listening to you).

And of course his bullies saw all of this new attachment so what else is better then to use you as a tool to make him obey their commands.

And he would do it,every single thing they ask he’ll do because one he was too weak to do anything he wasn’t built for fighting at all and two he didn’t want anything to happen to you.Hell if anything happens to you he wouldn’t know what he’ll do but he knew that he’ll do something that will put him in jail that for sure.

Even if he tries to find the fact on why he’s keep denying you.You found out pretty quickly and you hated on how much he had to deal with because of you.So you told him the usual thing like “oh yea it ok I’ll just wait” you acting like you didn’t know what was happening.

As you soonas he left you followed him to where ever the hell he went.And where choso was greeted by his bullies in the back of the school.To only see him be pushed by them and hitting his back against the wall.

You instantly grab your phone and hit record,but making sure that you weren’t getting caught.And so you painfully watched choso get beat up by his bullies for ‘giving them the wrong test answers and the incorrect information for their presentation for another class they had’.

You noticed that the whole time choso was getting beat up that choso had not once had reacted to any of their actions.

Keeping an emotionless expression the whole time,until the bullies got tried of it and left a bleeding choso. Right when they left, you ran towards choso your finger carefully touched his face.

His faces was covered either by bruises or blood,it frightened you how he looked so destroyed.

“C-choso?! Can you hear me,oh my god look at what they did to you”You wailed quietly as you cupped his face not caring about the blood that fall on your hands.

Choso looks up at you with such a weak nod,as his heart breaks seeing you brokenhearted over him,He gently removes your hands and get up with a grunt of pain.You quickly exclaim that he needed some help from moving.

You had pampered him the whole day making sure he’s okay and saying that he didn’t have to do anything for you.

You had constantly worried about it,saying that you couldn’t handle seeing your best friend getting hurt like that.

And that night you decided something that you’ll never have done before,and is to post the videos to the school board anonymously and send them to the bullies parents saying “To say that your the parents of these kids should be ashamed of it,to even let them act like this is absurd”.You by accident posted it online late at night.But it gain a lot of traction.

The bullies are soon later expelled from the school due to their actions.But everyone gave choso sympathy from their actions.But he couldn’t care less about their words.He just wanted to be with you,to live with you,to bathe in your warmth.

Choso hated the word friend when it comes out of you,but he can’t do anything but wait until the best time to prove that he all you’ll need.

“Um choso do you want to go to the park with me this weekend?” You Patiently asked him as you walked in a more slower pace.

Choso looked down at you with a heavy sigh;”I can’t do it this weekend this time I gotta take care of my little brother” Choso says as if he had no other choice to go,but then again he really loves taking care of his little brother.

Your mind didn’t process the brother part and just hum’s as a replies to him.But after a few seconds you turn your head to him and widen your eyes.

“Wait!! You have a brother!?!?” You exclaimed with eyes wide with sparkles and admiration.

Choso stops walking as the same as you do.He completely find your reaction bizarre but not in a bad way.

“Omg why don’t you ever tell me this;can I see your brother then this weekend? If that ok with you” You were giving choso a very intense eye contact.You mouth the word please.

Choso felt peer pressure by your eyes and your presence that he admitted to defeat.

He huff out and sighs but if he see you Miss treat his brother he would not have it.Either if he obsessive about you in every type of way.

“Fine” he says with a deep ponder of thought.

You face quickly shaped a genuine smile as you silently mouth the word ‘YAY’,throwing punches in the air.Making choso pondered on how easy is it to make you happy and it makes him feel happy that he is the one doing it.

The next day was definitely he’s favorite day,from the day you enter the house to when your visit had to go.You had played with Yuji the whole day.Making him laugh,smile and every thing;Choso was really happy that you were having fun with his little brother. And God he never had his heart beat so fast like that he swore that you could’ve heard it.

Several years has passed and you both graduated high school and now both of you are currently in college.Jujitsu Kasiten College.

And so after all the things you did for him he ended up trusting you more than anything.And now being alll mature he’s more then aware of how obsessive he is to you but how would you know.You simply saw him as your best friend.

But you being rather comfortable with him is something that feel to you at least correct.

Right?

I mean yea you two started to experience the part of life where you get a glow up or down and a lot of stuff change once you guys started to go to college together.

College was a turns of things to you that is;you had gotten more popular then usual.You had plenty of friends that loved to hang out with you and would constantly invite you to party with them.But you never felt the need to party just to have a big aching headache tomorrow morning.

Yea no.

And maybe you’re oblivious to things like dating or even when people tried to get you into dates with them.But you would sound crazy if you said that the thought of having being relationship never crossed your mind.

And Your girl friends always had something to say about your best friend choso.

Mostly saying stuff like “are you and choso dating?”. And your face flashed a pink blush on your cheeks,and As you would completely object the idea.

“NO!!! Oh my lord, I swear you guys always ask me that question every single time” You exclaimed at them.With a playful eye roll,your cheeks still have a faint redness,as you wished that this question would stop. And for your heart to stop heart to stop beating so fast whenever it about him.

But it was a way for them to tease you about it. Even one time one of them asked you personally.

“You sure you wouldn’t ever date him.You should at least try dating someone;life too short.And plus I think You two would be good for each other,just think about it.”

And boy you did think about it,you thought about it in the depth of night as you stare at the ceiling with their words echoing through your mind.And when you closed your eyes there was a image of him smiling at you.You shake your head and snap out of it.And quietly screamed into your pillow.

One thing was for sure that you needed to remind yourself that choso didn’t seem like he wanted anything to do with dating right now or with anyone.

Choso would be busy in the morning working out his body or something.Because ‘i think it better for me too at least get built’Which you rolled your eyes playfully.

“You’re already tall and Geeky,so some muscles aren’t going to be needed,since your brain is where all your muscles are at” You snickered at yourself for that comment.

He snorted at your comment,rolling his dark brownish eyes at you. Making him ruffle your soft looking hair in a messy way,that he knew you would scolded him to stop.He kept his well known open expression.His hearts warms up every single time your near,your around,your presence is anything close to his radius.

There one thing he still doesn’t show you or tell you,and that he writes songs and knows how to sings and knows how to play guitar (electric).

Because he thinks that you find that kinda of lame or boring so he never found the need to tell you that.

He became more obsessed with you,taking pictures of you doing whatever you do,bring you into his house to ‘babysit’ his baby(now teenager) brother.

Hell bet he’ll makes sure that you don’t go to any of the dates you have planned from random college guys.By saying excuses to get you to cancel them.

He acts like he doesn’t notices the changes that are your doing,but he see it,The way that now your took the time to style your hair or how you put lip gloss on now.Or even how you decided to do skin care for your body.

“Is that lipgloss you wearing?”Choso asked a little amused by it,while they walked and talk about the day as usual.Some topic were the party’s that some of the college students were gonna have or drama around the school.

Choso obviously notices it as soon as you meet him.His eyes were glued to your lips the whole time.

They look soft and sweet looking something that his been dying to try the taste too.

“Ooh Yea!! I am wearing lipgloss today,you notice it”

“Duh idiot,I wouldn’t have asked if you didn’t seem to have lipgloss on.”he remarked it as You lightly punch him playfully sticking out your tongue.

He justed bluff.

Choso knew that your turning into a more independent woman then you were before.Your acting like he doesn’t know the changes we’re going.You were still as beautiful as before even if they were not the best looking students back then.

“Um choso?” You mumbled softly towards your bathroom door since he was there in your bedroom right there laying down using his phone.

He head beamed into your direction of your voice,while his nonchalant expression.

“Yea (__) ?” He responded in an intrigued tone now putting his phone down waiting for you to open the bathroom door.

Thinking it something stuipd.Like you wearing clown makeup to scare him.But it was something else.

You open the bathroom door to show a beautiful dark violet dress with pretty black flowing sleeves on,finishing the look with a necklace shape star on it.

You look…

Stunning,incredible,remarkable,divine,Extraordinary the list goes on.He has now seen that you completely blossom into a beautiful woman.He swear that the air in his body had left when he saw you in that dress looking at him with wariness and nervousness.

“So how does it look?Does it look good on me or not I mean I could just return it since it not evens mine in the first place” You rumbled on with an anxious tone,Completely smiling at choso with awkwardness.

Choso snap out of his little daydream,and cleared his throat and thoughts before he said anything that would put his chances with you downwards.

“It look beautiful on you (_),actually it look incredible on you;but … what is the dress for?” He spoke in his causal calm voice,but in fact he mind wasn’t quite calm.

Pinkness start to form on your cheeks at his comments,But quckily fade away as soon as you remind yourself that it was just a compliment and that it.

Meanwhile choso in your bed looking normally as he just continues to stare at you.He was overthinking that someone had beat him in getting you,His heart was racing from fear or anger he didn’t know which one of the two.His jaw cleached from that thought alone.

‘no she couldn’t have someone already without telling me?’

Another thought

‘And who was she going to show herself dress up like that for,it should be me not some fuck’

Another thought

‘What if he has something I don’t have,that it makes him better than me,and what if this was a waste of time’

Another thought

‘No it ok I’ll just kill the guy,No what the point of the killing the guy,if it isn’t going to give me fucking chance of her worthy of being hers. Of her being Mine’

“CHoso!?” You yell in an uncertainty as you clapped your hands.

Your yelled grab his attention pushing his thought a side as his eyes widened as he look at you.

“Are you alright,did you even hear me” you spoke with a softness but lanced with concern.Your eyes searches him.

“Yea I’m okay,sorry I didn’t hear you.I was just daydreaming” choso says with his head scratching his neck looking at you with full concern.He give you an apologetic smile.

You stare deeply into him and then lay off the stare.

“Your such a dreamer, i swear. Anyway I was saying that I got this dress for the masquerade party there having at the school later this month!!”You announce with excitement as your hands and mouth were animated with joy.You ramble about how excited you were about it and choso enjoy your rambles on paying attention to what you said.

You both stop at some time to return home,or just you saying goodbye to choso for staying over.You completely forgot to ask him if he planned to go to the party.

Walking towards his place,the silence warp over him like a cloak,making him overwhelmed with his own thoughts.

Thoughts of you dwell in his mind;imagining of you being his.But as well as other thoughts about the future with you.Call him delusional but he has this plan all out for you.But he has other ideas for the masquerade and that he thinks that the perfect opportunity for him to tell you his feelings but how?

He doesn’t want it to something basic like him telling you his feelings,or make it a simple letter of love.And then he had an idea that he thinks that you enjoy.

And so when he got home,he made sure Yuji was asleep and proceeded to spend the rest of the night thinking and spawning ideas about a song that describes his feelings and what they meant to him but to you as well.

/cliffhanger/

An: i have been fucking trying to post this for like the longest but if it finally works then let go! Anyway i know this probably arent peak to me at least,But i hope yall like this. They is gonna be part three.

taglist: @mononijikayu @ukininayu @scoobysnakz @lynxslokley @ciggrx

I couldnt do this without the encouragement of @ukininayu and the proread of @ukininayu @scoobysnakz

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first work of 2025!