#why doesn't anyone love me in a way that is comprehensible to me

[ivan-fyodorovich-k]

I think I'm going to buy this amplifier

[ducktracy]

"Go See The Day the Earth Blew Up" Masterpost

this isn't really anything new for anyone following me, but i wanted to make a comprehensive post covering my adamence on seeing this movie--i have a lot of different versions of a lot of different posts being spread around, and wanted to uncross the wires a bit. entering Tumblr PSA mode for a bit like it's 2013 all over again--bear with me!

before getting into the nitty gritty, though, this is a TIME SENSITIVE POST. most theaters were beginning to pull the film out as early as end of day TODAY--not even a full WEEK'S worth of a run. but, thanks to word of mouth, the film has mostly been extended to the end of the weekend. with continued word of mouth and support, the film has a chance to run even longer.

What the Heck is The Day the Earth Blew Up

The Day the Earth Blew Up is an all traditionally hand-drawn, 2D animated film starring Looney Tunes' own Porky Pig, Daffy Duck and Petunia Pig. initially announced in September of 2021, it's the very first all traditionally animated film in the franchise's entire 95 year run.

Why Haven't I Heard About The Day the Earth Blew Up

originally intended to be a direct to streaming release, this film's existence has been wrung through the wringer. for the benefit of tax cuts, Warner Bros. wrote the film off and just barely avoided axing it entirely--even during its production. the film was put up for sale and only just last summer finally was able to procure an independent distributor, Ketchup Entertainment. unfortunately, Ketchup Entertainment is a much smaller name than Warner Bros. is, and because WB isn't releasing it, it's Ketchup who is marketing and spreading the film--obviously, something incredibly difficult to do with a very small budget.

Why the Heck Should I See The Day the Earth Blew Up

hand-drawn, traditionally animated films are all but extinct in theaters, and by setting the film up for what could essentially be described as sabotage, a meager box office performance is the perfect excuse for the suits to claim that there's no more demand for traditionally animated movies anymore.

it's the first all-animated Looney Tunes film in the entire franchise's history.

you don't have to have any knowledge or attachment to the characters to enjoy the film--there are absolutely no prerequisites required (but there are plenty of loving nods to fellow fans of the film.) i dragged my best friend to see this with me who doesn't have the same LT brain parasite that i do and she absolutely loved it.

WB just axed the entire LT library of shorts off of HBO Max, as well as gutted all of the cartoons freely available on their YouTube channel--there seems to be a clear embarrassment for the franchise on their behalf, and seeing the film proves that notion dead wrong.

supporting the film spreads the message that there is a demand for the love and craft that goes into these films. you will genuinely be experiencing history in the making--when's the last time you've seen a brand new, all traditionally animated film in the theaters from the States?

crew members themselves are urging you to spread your support and mention how it empowers them to keep making more

the money goes to Ketchup, not Zaslav--you don't have to worry about boycotting the film. the absolute opposite is necessary.

supporting this film could potentially spawn similar films with similar opportunities. Eric Bauza himself has mentioned that suport and turnout for this film could see a potential revival in Coyote vs. ACME, another film victim to WB's tax writeoffs all in the name of the dollar

EDIT: Ketchup Entertainment is in talks with WB to distribute Coyote vs ACME!!! because of the word of mouth and positivist surrounding The Day the Earth Blew Up!! keep it coming!!

it's likely that the film will be completely overshadowed by the Snow White remake, with theaters initially beginning to pull screens to make way for early previews. what could be more poetic than supporting an all traditionally hand-drawn film over a cash-grab remake of the very first feature length traditionally hand-drawn film?

How Else Can I Support The Day the Earth Blew Up

GO SEE IT! go see it again! go see it with your siblings, your friends, your family! tell your coworkers! reblog this post! spread the news! keep the conversation going!

pre-orders for the Blu-ray, releasing May 27th, are already scheduled

there's a limited edition run of 1,000 copies for the film's soundtrack on vinyl!

said soundtrack is also available on YouTube, which you should likewise listen to! get those view counts up!

Why the Heck Should I Listen to You

i'm asking myself the same thing! but, i do want to put this out there: i get it. i usually do not like being a walking advertisement. i know this is full on shill-mode and you're surely asking "you're being paid, aren't you" (i wish!). i also share the Ferocious Contrarian Gene where seeing posts like these is an instant way for me to NOT want to see the film. i genuinely understand how pushy and obnoxious this can come off. especially since, clearly, i'm a little biased to the franchise and these characters. i also balk at the guilt trippy idea of "YOU'RE A MONSTER IF YOU DON'T SUPPORT THIS FILM YOU KILLED ANIMATION". i HATE that rhetoric with a passion, and that only is going to alienate people from wanting to see this further. please know that's not the intent of my messaging here at all.

but even beyond my personal biases, i really think this is a film worth supporting. movies like this are a once-in-a-lifetime event anymore, and that could only be exacerbated by how this film's fate is handled. i've been overjoyed with the amount of messages i've received from people who said they caught the film on a whim and enjoyed it--especially from those without a clear LT bias like myself. it's proven that this film is enjoyable for anyone.

also, just, spite. the reason you haven't heard about it is by design. this film has been set up to fail. and while the success shouldn't be the sole responsibility or burden of the consumers, but instead the higher-ups, you are making a difference by supporting and spreading word of mouth of this film. crew members themselves are saying so. the distributor themselves are saying so.

i'm not expecting a miracle for this film, as much as i'd love one. i will genuinely be surprised if it makes a profit (which it should at a measly $15 million, pennies compared to most features that look much worse than this). but that's all the more reason to TRY rather than give up and say there's nothing we can do. you all have been making such a wonderful difference. that energy needs to continue, not dwindle. every single person is able to make a difference.

there are a lot worse ways you could be spending your time than spending an hour and a half at the theaters enjoying some gorgeous traditionally hand-drawn animation on the big-screen, feeling good that you're helping to spread a message and supporting the hard, loving craft of the people who worked on it. imagine if all "good turn"s in the world could be as fun and easy as seeing an animated comedy!

[teambyler]

The most hypocritical anti Byler argument:

"Why can't two boys just be friends? Why do you have to make everything gay!?"

Whenever I hear this argument or some variation of it, I think back to my two cousins, one a girl and the other a boy. (He was from my dad's side of the family; she was from my mom's.) They were maybe six years old at the time, and they were innocently talking and playing and giving each other math and spelling-bee quizzes. ALL my family were giggling, saying they were going to be boyfriend and girlfriend.

I also think back to all the times I see young girls being judged on their physical beauty and told they're going to have a handsome boy when they grow up because they're so pretty.

From childhood, boys and girls have their sexuality assumed for them. Their SEXUALITY and romantic possibility are talked about openly in front of their face. They're made to look at themselves sexually before they even want to.

So when people yell at Byler fans saying "Why do you have to make everything gay?" I want to scream at them:

"Why do you have to make everything straight!?"

Why do you insist on sexualizing children to be heterosexual even before they're ready to start thinking of themselves in those terms?

Why do you have no problem with Mike kissing El in season 1 right after she asks him if he's like her "brother"?

Why do you idealize their relationship when they were children, while simultaneously trying to shame Byler fans for trying to "sexualize children" even though these are fictional characters and the actors who play Mike and Will are already adults?

Why do you shame any thought or possibility of homosexual romance, while imposing heterosexual norms on everyone?

It reminds me of people who say "You can be gay of course... just don't shove it in our faces (by holding forth that you're gay, kissing in public, etc.)." When no one bats an eye when straight people do the same thing. They might claim they're not homophobic, but actual equal treatment of LGBT+ people they don't accept.

It's Straight Privilege in action: the norms and standards that straight people enjoy quietly do not to apply to us.

This hypocrisy even distorts how Milkvans view Mike and El. We're told that if Mike and Will get together, that would mean Mike "used El" and El would never be able to forgive him.

Not only does this disregard that people can have amicable break-ups and still be close friends: it also shows that the idea of a platonic loving relationship between a Mike and El is beyond their comprehension. To them, the only loving relationships boys and girls can have with each other are romantic ones.

(Now, before anyone objects: sure many people accept Robin and Steve, but that's because Robin is canonically gay. We all know that before she came out many of us (me included!) were shipping those two as a couple!)

If someone ships Mike and El WITHOUT her confronting him about his poor treatment of her in early s4, without there being an honest conversation about that, this definitely raises an eyebrow from me. The "love confession" didn't address this: his fear of losing her did NOT explain his failing to comfort her or failing to say he loved her. Theoretically it's possible for these two to repair things. (And if Milkvan is endgame I hope that they do by addressing this!) But for some Milkvan shippers the need to address Mike's behavior doesn't even enter their minds because they're idealizing their relationship. In other words, THEY are imposing their idea of a relationship on these two, much in the same way my family was imposing their own ideas on my two cousins without regard to the people involved.

So if anyone asks "Why can't two boys just be friends? Why do you have to make everything gay?" it's purely hypocritical and dishonest. No, we just want THIS relationship between Mike and Will (which is clearly being built up as romantic) to be gay out of a sea of heterosexual relationships on TV.

No. THEY are the ones who rule out a boy and girl just being friends. THEY are the ones who insist on imposing romance on a boy and girl when they're not ready. THEY are the ones who insist on "everything" being one way.

-teambyler

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

hi mx witch, I’ve been debating whether to send this in for a bit but I am curious what you think. I’ve been going back and forth on the ongoing “can you read at least one singular book by a Black woman” discussion bc there is a thing where especially white readers (I am also white, non american but also somewhere with significant Black diaspora) hold up Black authors as somehow being the pinnacle of diversity and ending the conversation there. I don’t think you are doing this btw but this is the reading comprehension site. I just worry it doesn’t prompt people to think about more general issues of diversity in publishing when E/SE/S Asian authors also get screwed over in the industry (especially Asian women who don’t want to write about being Oppressed by their Traditional Culture) and there are just shamefully few published Indigenous authors from any continent.

HOWEVER. then I see some of the more tar pit responses to your book posts and to the rap discourse (oh my god the rap discourse) and I am like. hmmm maybe we should stay focussed on prompting people to challenge their anti-blackness for a bit when so many people are clearly incapable of the baby step of reading more widely. Much to consider.

📚

ps if you post this and anyone reads it and goes “oh wow this is so right, I guess I don’t need to read books by Black women”: no

pps SORRY for spam if this is a second anon, I asked this morning with dodgy signal and have no idea if it went through or if you are just swamped/don’t want to reply. no pressure.

hi anon,

I think it's a really good and thoughtful question, and I appreciate the good faith engagement with this question a lot! your concern reminds me a lot of something Yaa Gyasi (an author who's come up a lot in discussion about Black women writers!) said in this interview a few years ago:

Representation isn’t enough. It’s not enough to see people as representatives, and not actually engage with what they’re trying to say. I guess I’ve been feeling dispirited about the way that my work gets read, as it allows people to pat themselves on the back and feel like they’ve done something. Is literature enough? That’s frankly the question I’ve been asking this past year. I used to be the kind of person who would say this is making us more empathetic. But I’m not sure anymore if that’s what’s happening. Are you reading, or are you reading? 

and I definitely agree with her, and think that a lot of people have a tendency to reduce authors who aren't white, heterosexual men to tokens whose work they're morally obligated to read to be Good Allies, rather than because the work genuinely speaks to them, entertains them, moves them, challenges them, or does anything else that literature is capable of. it doesn't help that the publishing industry itself has an awful tendency of tokenzing authors, as you alluded to.

this is one of the reasons why I never include spaces pertaining to an author's personal identity on the reading bingo sheets that I design. I know that prompts like "read a book by a Native author" or "read a book by a trans author" and so on are quite popular in many book bingo spaces, but to me they run the risk of tokenizing those authors and make it seem as if it's fine if, for instance, no Native or trans authors are found anywhere else on the sheet, since they have a designated space. which isn't a perfect solution, to be sure - without a specific prompt, it's just as likely that there will be zero authors who are Native or trans or whatever other marginalized identity one can come up with on the bingo sheet. I'll be honest: as much as I love seeing the bingo sheets my followers are filling out, I'm a little stunned and disheartened to see how starkly white many of them are!

in this conversation, where people are being challenged to name even a single author who's a Black woman and coming up short, I think many people, especially hobby readers, are maybe realizing for the first time that they way they read doesn't quite live up to the ideas of equity that they personally hold and they're interested in changing that now. I've received a lot of feedback that does boil down to people excitedly reporting that they're now deliberately rushing to the library to seek out books by Black woman, and I can easily see how, pessimistically, that could be seen as further tokenizing those authors.

as much as I've rolled my eyes at the people who loudly insist that they couldn't possibly know what gender, race, ethnicity, etc, any author is because they only care about the story (with the implication being that knowing anything about the author would somehow cheapen the story - lmao), I do somewhat understand where they're coming from. while colorblindness is certainly not the solution, it would be ideal if nobody had to think much about hitting any kind of quota in regards to their reading habits. and I'm certainly not advocating for anything that strictly structured! but if so many people can't name a single Black woman who's written a book, then we need to acknowledge that there's a reason for that, and that not all authors are being read equally, and that it takes an active effort to course correct something like that.

my hope is that, with time, readers broadening their horizons enough that they don't have to actively seek out Black women authors (or Black authors in general, or Asian authors, or Latine authors, or trans or Muslim or disabled or Jewish authors, or authors translated into English, and so on) because those authors and their works will become a natural part of their literary diet that no single author is a sole representative of any group or perspective and can be appreciated solely on the basis of their craft.

but maybe the first baby step, as you said, has to be googling "Black woman authors." and maybe that's a little tokenizing! but when we're beginning from the rock bottom position of people struggling to name a single Black woman author at all, you have to start somewhere. I'm really glad to see people actually getting excited to do the work, and I hope they don't stop at reading one (1) book by Yaa Gyasi or Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie because a tumblr post made them feel uncomfortable.

I hope that makes sense and is a satisfying answer!

[applecherryandpears]

BBC Radio 1 - 1997: The love edition

Can't believe that so many seminal Noel & Liam quotes are from the very same interview, either Noel's life + music crisis poured it all out of him, or the good moments are just indeed that good BTS.

Naturally, they were (allegedly) drunk. Liam wasn't supposed to show up but he changed his mind last minute, my headcanon is that he missed Noel judging from how well they got along that day.

I'm very friendly to my bed, I love my bed, and my bed loves me.

(Interviewer says Liam only gets better, Noel complains Liam doesn't show up for B sides recordings, Liam says he had a sore throat, and somehow, this comes to this.)

Love-love-love. Liam twists exhibition (oasis photo thing) into expedition and Noel's bullying turns into a live fantasy of marching down the south pole wastelands together to build heart shaped igloos, also Liam's shy. And fighting for his life.

There we have it, a recorded (half) confession.

Okay so here I find the "as long as ... for a couple of quids" holds some meaning as Noel goes a little rigid saying no. Can't ever meant this. but I can't for the life of me understand Liam.

Also Liam clears out that inspiration entails for him listening and understanding him without rushing into ill-made judgments and it's palpable he's at his limits with the media. Coincidentally the day after this interview he was tracked down by journalists, asking him if he had regrets over what he said, because apparently he swore too much and had people clutch on their pearls all over the UK.

Supersonic quote but in full. Mad for it, Noel says.

I'll be a really good uncle to Liam's child.

I could sum this one up with Pardon? but -- "that man is a bigger man than I am, why, it has nothing to do with you, but he has to deal with life and with somebody like me on top of everything else" yet by the end of that year it had all gone to flames. Also audio proof they did give each other birthday presents, not lost on me this one.

Noel truly cares about Liam's opinion but won't show it (nothing new ik) However that giggle at the end has my wonders.

Bonus:

In the honour of a 2024 magazine article deeply regretting Liam's menacing aura and rock n roll attitude from 1997

And, if anyone can possibly make out what Liam says Noel is pointing his way, this one maxed out my comprehension skills:

[17020]

ren kaji is perceptive. it might take him a bit sometimes, but he's got the spirit.

he's attentive. his eyes constantly linger, taking in your every move. from the way your fingers move while typing new music recommendations on his phone, to the way in which your nose crinkles when you laugh at him, he's observing the way in which you do practically�� anything.

it didn't take long for kaji to know something's up.

standing in front of the mirror and taking longer than usual, a slight look of disappointment in your eyes—one that kaji doesn't miss. a look of discomfort when you're showered with compliments, and a smile that to the naked eye seems entirely genuine, accompanied with a change in your voice—the slight drop of kaji's favorite tune is immediately perceived.

time flies. way too fast for your liking.

the third and final year is coming, with summer break reaching the half-way checkpoint. kaji's lying down on his couch and you're on top of him, your head on his chest, careful to count every beat of his heart.

around 110? you can't tell, but you know he grows nervous when you're close.

you call out to him, feeling the vibrations of his chest as he hums in response. "do you think i can transfer and spend my last year in furin?"

"dunno, i'd have to ask umemiya and tsubaki" he hums, his eyes quickly narrowing as he moves his hand to entangle it in your hair. "don' think that's possible though, furin's an all-boys school."

"baby…"

he's analyzing your reaction, slowly removing his hand from your hair as you raise your head to face him.

"i'm transferring to furin, so please send me tsubaki's number so i can go through admissions."

"but you're a—"

"ren."

"what?"

"ren."

your gaze softens, and it's in that moment where everything clicks. every piece that was scattered in his mind comes together as he's seeing the full picture—the puzzle is complete.

"oh."

"yeah, oh."

"should've told me sooner, i could've helped with anything you needed" he reprimands, his hand now on your cheek. "you thought i was gonna give you shit for it?"

you avert his gaze, and that tells him everything he needs to know. his thumb softly caresses your cheek as he thinks back to all the signs, why couldn't he get the hint from way back then?

"don' have many clothes, but you can take some if you want—they're comfortable. i'll talk to tsubaki so don't worry about anything, and if anyone gives you shit, you call me."

it's not subtle at all, his attempt to be supportive. from the last few minutes he gathered that it's abundantly clear that comprehension and support is what you need, and you feel as if what he offers isn't enough. if he has to step up his game, he will.

"thanks, ren" you smile.

"'s nothing, dude."

"dude? we've been dating for a year. be fucking for real."

he softly chuckles, leaning down to place a kiss on your forehead. "sorry, prince."

note. inspired by @kissagii 's post which i love sm, this is for you!! sorry this was rushed a bit i'm sleepy.

[thisdiscontentedwinter]

Fandom really never changes, does it? Or at least the level of reading comprehension for a significant part of it is always going to be poor.

Since my new BFF yslbby blocked me on AO3 so that I can no longer reply to the comments they left in my comment section, I thought I'd reply here instead.

Here's the comment that started it all:

For someone who doesn't gaf, they sure made sure to tell me they didn't gaf, right?

Reading comprehension on full display here.

Yslbby, if you're reading this, please try to actually read it.

I didn't once say "it's okay to be pedos irl" because "underage" is not simply a synonym for "paedophilia." And, without getting into the weeds too much (of either the clinical definitions or the legal ones) in many places an age gap of 16 and 19 is not considered underage. To be clear, you can be skeeved out all you like at the thought of a 16 year old having sex with someone over 18, and that's your right. You can attach whatever moral judgment you want to that. But it's still not paedophilia, and calling it the wrong thing dilutes the meaning of that word.

To everyone who reads this, no, I wouldn't usually bring AO3 comments to Tumblr, even ones as ignorant and rude as these, but if you're going to comment like a troll on my fics and then block me so I can't respond, then yes, I absolutely will.

And I'd still love to know why my fic got this comment from my new BFF, but the 185 other fics tagged as "underage" in their bookmarks didn't. I mean, usually I'd dismiss this as anti bullshit or baby puritan's first day on the internet, but 185 other underage fics? I mean, I think my fic is pretty special too, but I didn't know how special! So thanks, boo.

And as for the repeated "idgaf cuz I said what I said," sweetie, I know. That's your cross to bear. And given the combination of your stellar reading comprehension, your eloquence and the way you put yourself out in the world that all meets in a place that's uniquely you, that cross must be feeling pretty heavy indeed.

If anyone else would like to be morally outraged by the fic in question, here's a link:

https://archiveofourown.org/works/3377438

Most people really seem to love the story, but hey, I guess most people aren't as insightful as yslbby.

[idrawweirdstuffnominors]

I saw your Girl dad! Josh post!

….Bill in his girl dad arc when (JK! JK!….unless)

(Lol lock tf in chat this is gonna get interesting to say the least

Bill dickey as a Girl Dad headcannons

1. "You're Not Dating Anyone Until You're Thirty-Five."

Bill is insanely overprotective but in the worst possible way. He doesn't trust anyone, especially boys. If his daughter so much as mentions a crush, he launches into a 15-minute rant about how “men are scum, and I should know, because I am one!”

2. Turns Her into a Nerd by Force.

He starts her on comics, sci-fi, and horror movies from the womb. Think “Alien” at age six and mandatory Sunday night viewings of Twilight Zone.

“You don’t get to sleep until you can name the entire creative team behind Swamp Thing vol. 2.”

3. Absolutely Cannot Handle Emotions.

She cries? He panics. He just stands there holding a Mountain Dew can like, “Uh… do you want… a Funko Pop or something? Stop leaking! I didn’t raise a weakling!”

4. The Most Toxic PTA Parent Ever.

He shows up to school meetings in a black trench coat, rants about the school’s media literacy failures, and says things like, “If my daughter’s being bullied, I will sue. I have lawyers. I know people on forums. Don’t test me.”

5. Secretly the Best Coach in a Weird Way.

Bill is a ruthless perfectionist when she shows interest in anything creative. “If you’re gonna draw anime, do it right. These proportions? Amateur. You call this anatomy? This is CalArts-tier crap, and I won’t allow it under my roof.”

But his standards push her to be really, really good—even if she wants to murder him half the time.

6. Grudgingly Proud Dad Mode

She wins an art contest or aces a project? He brags nonstop for a month—but never directly to her face.

“She’s not bad. I mean, obviously she got the talent from me. But yeah, whatever. I guess she’s okay.”

7. Hyper Fixates on Her Interests to “Vet” Them

If she likes something he doesn’t understand (like K-pop), he goes full rage-research mode. Watches 6-hour YouTube essays. Then returns to say things like:

“Okay. So this Jungkook guy? I guess he’s talented. Still don’t trust him.”

8. Accidentally Raises a Girl Just Like Him

One day she quotes The Thing perfectly, destroys a boy in an online debate, and calls someone a “poser” for not knowing Kirby’s original designs. Bill just stares and mutters, “My work here is done.”

9. Will Go to War for Her

She never sees it, but if anyone seriously messes with her? He’s already on the dark web tracking their IP address. His threats are too specific.

“You want me to drop their home address or are we playing the long game?”

10. Sentimental? Nope. Never. (Okay, Maybe Once.)

He keeps a photo of her in his wallet, folded and beat up. He never talks about it.

But sometimes, when she’s not around, he looks at it and sighs.

“She’s… fine. Not like she makes me proud or anything. Idiot.”

“The Coat”

Bill was elbow-deep in a tote labeled "CON BADGES / UNTOUCHED GARBAGE", muttering under his breath about how these kids wouldn’t know practical effects if they crawled out of a latex womb, when his daughter walked in—dragging the massive, beat-up orange flannel from the back of his closet behind her.

It was practically a robe on her. Oversized, worn, and clinging to the smell of years of conventions, bad takeout, and Bill’s lingering rage.

Daughter:

“…Can I wear this to school tomorrow?”

Bill turned like she’d just asked to burn his comic collection.

Bill:

“That? You mean my coat? The coat I wore to every screening of The Thing between ‘92 and ‘06? The coat I nearly got kicked out of Wizard World for wearing over a Gremlins tee because some idiot thought I was doing a bit?”

Daughter: (nodding calmly)

“Yeah. That one.”

Bill: (offended beyond comprehension)

“Why would you want to wear that? You trying to look like a failed screenwriter with back problems?!”

Daughter:

“It’s warm. And I like how it smells. Like… your weird soap and burnt pizza.”

Bill: (pointing dramatically)

“That’s character! You don’t earn that smell, you live in it.”

Daughter:

“I want to live in it. Just for the day.”

That shut him up for a second. He looked at her—dwarfed by his rage-blanket of a coat, arms poking out like she was wrapped in a sleeping bag—and muttered something under his breath that sounded suspiciously like: “…you’re a menace…”

Bill: (grumbling)

“Fine. But if anyone spills anything on it, anyone—you, your friends, some gluten-free goober with a juice box—I will rain hellfire upon that school. I will march in there, I will quote John Carpenter until they expel themselves, and I will not be held responsible for what happens next.”

Daughter: (grinning)

“Love you too, Dad.”

Bill:

“I didn’t say that. I don’t believe in love. I believe in practical effects and staying angry.”

She rolled her eyes, already backing out of the room.

Daughter:

“Sure. I’ll be careful. I swear on your limited edition ‘Murder of Crows’ box set.”

Bill: (horrified)

“DON’T YOU JOKE ABOUT THAT—!”

But she was gone. And he was left staring at the empty spot where the coat had been, rubbing his temples and muttering:

Bill:

“Kid’s gonna be the death of me. In the best possible way.”

[lyredragon]

I really like KOBD for a lot of reasons, primarily because I really enjoy Breakdown as a character (he's like me fr....)

I just wanted to give a couple thoughts:

Breakdown was an ex-Wrecker, he is very strong. Not really too sure about how smart he is, but he doesn't seem to be himbo levels inadequate-in-the-processor.

I think this would translate to someone who is stern but also gentle, somewhat of a guiding light for people he cares about but very stern and quiet around people he isn't; a source of comfort for his loved ones, but an immovable wall for others. For Knockout, this translates into an unshakeable trust in him and his skills as both a person and a medic, he can turn his back on Knockout and doesn't have to worry about getting stabbed in the back. If Knockout spontaneously told Breakdown he needed emergency surgery now the man would just climb up onto the medical berth without a second thought.

Knockout is very meticulous. He likes being pretty, he is confident and absolutely knows his worth. This does translate to him being shallow and vain, but he is also very detail-oriented, which is what I think makes him a genuinely good medic.

Knockout is very smart, aside from the fact he is a medic, he does seem to have a basic comprehension of scientific processes and can execute them; that being said, this detail orientation also translates into being able to read others well. Knockout knows when to stop pressing buttons and what buttons are okay to press to get a rise out of people because he's able to suss out their mannerisms easily

And I think this is why Breakdown initially found him romantically appealing; I imagine Breakdown is actually rather shut off from other people. He's too anxious to actually let anyone in, especially in the Decepticon ranks, especially when he's a part of the most chaotically mentally unwell combiner squad there is. He follows orders to a T because he doesn't trust easy. The less he makes himself known, the better.

And then cue Knockout, who reads him like a book and is able to so effortlessly acknowledge his boundaries upon first meet while simultaneously being one of the only mechs to get a laugh and a rise out of the normally stoic mech; Knockout is able to get under his plating in such a way that it makes it actually enjoyable to be around him.

For Knockout, he enjoys the doting of course, Breakdown loves to pamper his loved ones, but it's also about being able to see Breakdown as he is. Knockout doesn't need Breakdown to change, he just needs him to be able to relax and have fun, and he does when he's with Knockout

And I think abt this a lot

[jinlin-at-the-moon]

Hi I'd LOVE to hear ur thoughts on transwoman shen qingqui

oh my god its actually happened. someone gave me an excuse to talk about this. holy shit lets go

the Thing with shen qingqiu is, as many of us know, that if anyone out there holds the crown of sheer denial, it is in fact the superior qing jing peak lord. shen qingqiu has a couple incredibly specific quirks to her internal monologue, and for the purposes of this mini essay (which will likely not go as in-depth as i'd like as i haven't had time to re-read the books recently and also don't have them physically with me right now so an actual essay-may-come this is not), i specifically note a few patterns with her thinking.

THE DENIAL, AS AFOREMENTIONED - we all know about this one. sqq, is, dear god, really good at being absolutely balls deep in denial about both her own feelings and also the feelings of others (especially when it comes to luo binghe, who i will also get into at some point in this).

RELATED, THE MENTAL GYMNASTICS - at surface level, it seems like the denial and the mental gymnastics are one and the same - however, i generally pose that they're not, exactly, but the mental gymnastics are still derivative of the denial; and by that i'm specifically counting 'mental gymnastics' to mean all those instances of thinking one thing that is actually true with her actually really good deduction skills not enough people give her credit for, then IMMEDIATELY following it up with a "haha but surely that cannot be true because i read pidw and i know better than my initial assumptions" (which is, in fact, precisely why people don't give her enough credit for those initial deduction skills. i love this woman's bullshit so much)

THE PROJECTION (wife edition) - in svsss, there are multiple, multiple instances of this one; it's specifically all those moments where sqq thinks about Luo Binghe's Many Wives™ when if you read past the 5 layers of self-bullshitting you immediately realise that she's just straight up talking about herself. she's awful, really.

THE PROJECTION (binghe edition). see i told you i'd get to him. this one is harder to explain without concrete examples actually, which is why i'd love for this to be a comprehensive essay after re-reading the books, but alas it is not. basically, shen qingqiu does this Thing (primarily after the kiss in book 2 happens and onwards, but it does show up earlier in smaller doses iirc) where she projects all of her wants onto binghe - particularly when it comes to sexual/romantic endeavours, but this happens just… in general? again really hard to tell you what exactly i mean without examples, so i gotta source: trust me bro on this even though i don't like doing that, but. trust me bro.

so, that's the foundation, right? where all of these patterns are used in the book is quite obvious - and that is, well… all over the place, really, but what immediately does come to mind is The Queerness - and specifically, its repression by shen qingqiu herself. in the story, The Queerness of it all is primarily taken to mean specifically homosexuality, and the values superimposed on sqq's psyche clashing with her own repressed sexuality and current situation, and also that she very undeniably loves binghe both like a child and a lover. (this is NOT about to turn into one of my freudian musings, but that's mostly because someone has already done that way better than me. shoutout to tshirt's svsss freud essay it's deeply important to all of my svsss beliefs btw it does also touch on the trans woman sqq thing which is fun. anyways.) …actually, no, the milf thing is relevant. we'll get to the milf thing. but back to talking about gay shit, shen qingqiu makes…. a lot. of references. to being a woman. and all of her thought patterns become Relevant while doing it- y'know, those same patterns she already uses for homosexuality, quite famously a queer thing to be, so it's like. The Queerness:

while the denial doesn't quite come into play directly, for obvious this-is-not-canon-and-i'm-just-insane-but-will-nonetheless-make-my-point reasons, it's present all throughout this reading - she's already really, really good at being in denial. it's not just a river in egypt to her, wait does egypt exist in svsss's specific setting actually? like this is a different can of worms but while mdzs does directly take place in china and tgcf is slightly less so but also implied to be in a very fantasy time period but still china i legit can't remember if any of those kinds of geographical references exist in svsss or if pidw was just straight up in the same sphere as The General Fantasy Setting is to western medieval fantasy? i'm getting way off topic here, it's a lifestyle. the mental gymnastics are relevant in that sqq is generally very prone to adjusting reality to her own mindset wherein she's self-assured that the reality she imagines is the true one, as well as her own dissociation from her own wants and needs covered up by But I Cannot Be Thinking That (most relevant example i can think of being her real grief over binghe she refused to acknowledge for fear of acknowledging her own feelings as a whole, while SPECIFICALLY also referring to herself as 'alike to a grieving widow', which is just further fuel for me) and her later projections of her own issues on binghe. that being said, i do think being post-canon will do her a lot of good. babygirl please get your brain out of survival mode and do some introspection. anyway, the projection (both kinds) is where Shen Qingqiu Is A Trans Woman is the most prevalent in its theory, because the projection allows for…. a lot of woman comparison that sqq may make. ESPECIALLY the wife thing. i've never counted how many times sqq either directly or indirectly compares herself to one of Luo Binghe's Many Wives™, and right now the only time that happens that comes to mind is during the dream demon arc - which, by the way, is absolutely full of sqq comparing herself to a woman, and it's also (iirc) the first 'maiden luo' comparison appearance, so it's just, like. the first scene i ask anyone who asks me about this headcanon to read while keeping "but what if she's trans" in mind, really.

speaking of the 'maiden luo' comparisons, that's the only concrete number in this essay i can give you, because i counted it a while ago. shen qingqiu refers to luo binghe as a 'maiden' 11-12 times across the four books. and while you'd THINK most of those would happen pre-abyss, a vast majority actually appear after the kiss in book 2, which is the moment where sqq imo honestly starts (admittedly still through 50 layers of self-bullshitting still) begrudgingly making the shift from the m to the f in milf. this is hilarious for a number of reasons, even transgenderism theory aside, but this post is not about putting transgenderism theory aside, so let's just. look at that. and think about it. really think about it. because maybe, deep down, what shen qingqiu might just really want, is a dedicated lesbian relationship with luo binghe. god bless. jokes (?) aside, the fact that sqq starts doing all the comparison of either herself or binghe to women way more often specifically after she is made to realise the true extent of binghe's feelings for her feels really important here. it's almost like, the second she begins letting up on her queer repression even a little bit, some other feelings escape. curious, isn't it. it's great.

now, am i going to address the perhaps-elephant in the room? as in, you know. the 'as long as she's a real woman' line? actually i am, but specifically because that line made me laugh and then immediately start considering this theory in the first place. i'm not kidding, that's where it started, and then i slowly went insane over time. it really does fit sqq's particular brand of repression, though. like damn girl, they gave you internalised homophobia AND internalised transphobia? how much shit do you have internalised? many shits, probably. god knows what else is there.

oh, and speaking of iconic lines. well. this whole essay, had i the ability to add in direct quotes, absolutely would include Every Single Time Shen Qingqiu Compares Herself To Su Xiyan, You Know, Famously Luo Binghe's Mother. THIS is where i talk about the milf thing, actually, because it's still absolutely INSANE to me that that shit is just, In The Text. like. wow. i both question my own sanity and keep being like it's mind boggling how much the text itself wants to prove me right. anyways, sqq and sxy have extremely deliberate set up parallels between them - in particular with the tlj/lbh parallel added in as well, but also with bingqiu themselves, which. hilarious. and freudian, again. go read the freud essay. sqq is compared to sxy a LOT, she both does it herself and other people do it - which does lead to the infamous 'i wouldn't have aborted you' line, which is just…. the quintessence. of why i love this book so fucking much. and also the milf thing is evidence for my crazed mumblings so whatever. i think you get my point here

(…and since we're talking about other people comparing sqq to a woman, because it's somewhat relevant. this happens. quite significantly. with one other character in particular. like most sqq woman references are mostly either from her own weird twisted mind with the "The Wives™" thing or with the su xiyan thing or the forlorn widow after binghe's nightmare road trip started thing. but there's. one person. who. weirdly consistently does this? and i truly don't know what to think about it but. hey airplane why do you forcefem cucumber-bro in your head so much. there is generally a lot of things wrong with airplane, but the '[peerless cucumber] is alike to a wife married to a disappointing husband' in regards to pidw readership line literally lives in my head rent free all the time forever and everything that's around it is just…. it's bad even with context. what. this isn't an airplane essay but with the knowledge that luo binghe was to some degree airplane's self-insert does make me feel some kind of way in addition. airplane. please. like airplane was trans(masc) in his past life in my head which is also an interpretation essay i wish to write one day but that doesn't make anything better. this whole paragraph is just an unrelated tangent. i'm sorry airplane-bro is my second favourite character and his sqq woman references are Numerous i can't do anything about it)

--anyways, so. this last point i'm going to make is one that is honestly less about the trans thing in general, and moreso a general take i have, so. here goes,

putting the trans in transmigration: i think there is a lot of merit to observing transmigration/isekai-type stories as a sort of allegory for queerness in general. while svsss is, on its level, already an exploration of this, i do wish to on my own terms also give a thought or two i've had about my reading. shen qingqiu is, in my honest opinion, sort of misrepresented in the fandom quite often. it's not even a case of blatant mischaracterisation (even if that also happens sometimes), but rather a case of 'what's in a name'; or rather, what's in an identity. i opened this post by calling shen qingqiu, as we know her, the main character of svsss, "the superior qing jing peak lord" -and while some would see it as a comedic jab to lighten the mood, it's really not such in the long run of this specific meta. becoming the peak lord of qing jing, becoming shen qingqiu, is the best thing that could have happened to peerless cucumber, internet critic, 'pretty-boy wasting his life away', IRL ID 'shen yuan'. see those air quotes thats right bitch this is going to be my hottest take in this essay: shen yuan is her deadname. i am both dead serious AND alive silly.

i actually wrote a post about this on my old account here, and to be quite honest i still stand by that my thoughts there - if you look closely, shen qingqiu never refers to herself as 'shen yuan' post-transmigration. she's fully locked in. she has accepted that courtesy name with grace and immediate acceptance, and in general doesn't… think much? about her old life and name? in fact the only other reference i can think of to the name 'shen yuan' is with the mushroom arc, where the mushroom body's appearance is based on her old body in part - and it's also particularly interesting to note that she doesn't feel one way or another about either of her appearances, which is food for thought no matter which way you take that! point is - shen qingqiu is shen qingqiu. she fucking LOVES being shen qingqiu. she goes from 'wasting away' in her old life to being a good teacher and finding joy in her work, having actual friends besides one weird guy online she had a parasocial hatred for, having a partner who cares for her, and a life she actually likes, and while i do think that angst may come from coming off survival mode and properly processing all those deaths she had, that angst is not going to be about 'impersonation' of any kind - because, well, shen qingqiu is shen qingqiu, and she's happy to be shen qingqiu and stay Shen Qingqiu Specifically forever. am i annoying with the emphasis on purpose, maybe? this goes beyond transgender interpretation thoughts this is just my hot take post right now - people love to give sqq name drama or transmigrator angst that just, in my take, doesn't actually work for her - she is no longer shen yuan, and she is not shen jiu (who, nota bene, she doesn't refer to as "the real sqq" ever), and while she feels momentary regret for getting all in sj's business, it's ultimately but a part of her experience in the world she lives in now; the world she's building a life in, the world which in spite of all of its contrivances she likes living in far more than her old one, the world she's been able to craft her own identity in. and that's really the core of it all, honestly- the point of this meta, i mean, though we got quite far away from it for a second there for the sake of my own grievance, so. sorry. this is a transgenderism essay, i promise. because shifting into a new name and identity without hesitation and finding yourself in a whole new reality you come to love far more than the depressing life you've left behind is, in my opinion, an EXTREMELY trans narrative, and in the end, that's the true point i wish to make-

(-well, that, and ALSO that people should stop a-yuaning her ass because thats her deadname that she hasn't thought about in years, but that's another one of my personal old man yells at mountain type fanon grievance-)

-so, in conclusion. my fun guy trait is dragging people in with memes then making it profound - and that's, hugely, why i adore svsss so much; because it really does the same thing. thank you for enabling my bullshit. if anyone wishes to argue with me about any of this you are Welcome To btw i love debating on the internet. cya around when i actually write a proper essay with quotations on this <3

("by the way, koi," you may ask, "by making shen qingqiu a trans woman, aren't you making bingqiu straight, and doesn't that impact/undermine the whole sexuality realisation sqq already canonically has?" to that i answer, no. sqq is right with all those maiden luo instances. because to me, too, luo binghe is a he/him lesbian*. thank you for coming to my ted talk)

[dollypopup]

Happy Colin Week! Is it really Day 7 already? Say it isn't so!

But this one is right up my alley: what I love about Luke Newton's depiction of Colin. I mean, damn, how much time you got? There is so much about the subtle choices Luke made to portray about Colin that just brought him to life for me. The acting decisions are clear and comprehensive. You can tell that Luke built Colin from the ground up.

From how his voice softens when he's playing Colin, to the specific fidgets Colin has, there's so much thoughtfulness he poured into his character. Luke had Colin fidget with his fingers, rock back and forth on his heels, when Luke's own fidgets are different- rubbing his lips, grabbing the backs of chairs, stimming by talking with his hands.

A lot of people very disrespectfully say that Luke wasn't even acting when he was playing Colin, and because he's been said to be the most like his character, it continues to be perpetuated, but Luke's acting of Colin is purposeful, and is not just a reflection of himself. It's a representation of how much he cares about his craft.

I think Luke brought such an unyielding, tender sensitivity to Colin that resonates with me and rounds Colin out so well. Colin doesn't feel like a character, in Luke's hands, but rather like a full, understandable, believable person. He's very different from his book counterpart, who is loved by Julia Quinn but no less a trope for it, and it shows. Colin in the show doesn't come across as a trope. He's less angry, more feeling. Less theatrical and more realistic. How he starts crying at the Lady Whistledown reveal instead of getting angry in the way one might expect. His decision to have Colin eating in the background of all his scenes. How he learned to fence with his right hand even though he's a lefty. How he delivers dry quips. How he can be cheeky but only with people he's comfortable with. The sweet, subtle dorkiness that he makes clear in Colin's mannerisms. His humor. I still giggle over his 'Yes, she's a very good acquaintance. . .of the family's. . .of course' and 'not even a dream' after he dreamed up smooch smooching Penelope in his very own rendition of a Pride and Prejudice love confession, mist and all.

And, god, his expressions. When he tells Penelope that charm can be taught and he's so unbelievably flirty and cute. Then when he's pining and distracted when she eats the cupcake. How he waits a beat and then asks Benedict 'is all well with you?' with such a little brother face. His flat 'no' expression of disapproval when they're telling John to throw rocks at Fran's window. How he has to swallow and hesitate when he tells Eloise that she's very lucky she hasn't been in love. And that's all just season 3!!! Don't get me started on his 'everyone says that [I'm Daphne's favorite' in season 1 or how cunty he was when he crossed his legs and told Anthony 'Why does anyone marry, brother? for love.', his 'have you ever visited a farm' delivery or how gentle he was when he said 'you are pen, you are my friend, you do not count', and how his cheeks smush when Benedict grabs him or how he raises his eyebrows when he's been a little shit.

The way he dances, smooth and steady, the decision with only using certain fingers to fix Penelope's dress (I mean, the man dominated the internet with that choice), the way he can make his eyes shine as if on demand. Bring those big, wet seal eyes this way, baby. How can anyone ever be mad at him???

The way he made deliberate choices for how he moved his body. In the mirror scene, he is ROLLING his hips, holding himself up on one arm. How he snaps his belt open. His O face. Jesus, his O face. It was so damn realistic it reminded me of people I've been intimate with myself, in real life. He always has Colin cupping the back of Penelope's head when they're kissing, showing us with actions how protective and tender Colin is. When he wears his brown coat, he walks in a way so that it whips around and billows behind him. In the carriage, he was on his knees for hours on that hard floor. I can't even kneel on a hard floor for like 10 minutes.

And then how he talks about Polin. Luke Newton GETS IT. Sometimes I swear he's the only one who fully gets it. When he says that Penelope gives him a sense of home. How it's a coming of age for both Colin and Penelope. How their dynamic shifts and it puts them on more level ground with one another, where he gets the chance to do the yearning. When he was constantly asked the same tired glow up questions and redirected from the superficial changing of the outside (and Luke Newton has always been hot, fight me) to how they had to do the internal work because that's where the real transformation happens.

How he takes his experience as a neurodivergent man and depicts Colin as one, too. Not exactly like him, but ND nonetheless. How he understands and empathizes with Colin, even when it seems like the writers and directors and fans themselves don't. How he cheers for Colin to find himself and happiness but doesn't excuse his actions.

And then, of course, how absolutely beautiful this man is. I mean, Jesus Christ spread thin and buttery on a cracker, he is all capital letters FINE. His soft, denim blue eyes? His adorable pointy little ears? His smile. That jawline. His curls. I was crushing on him all the way back in Season 1. What a babe.

Luke Newton popped his whole pussy when he played Colin Bridgerton. We were so, so lucky to have him.

[aspecpplarebeautiful]

im aromantic, and im in a queerromantic relationship with my girlfriend. it is functionally a romantic relationship, there is nothing that makes not a romantic relationship beyond my own personal discomfort with the term. its just a relationship, queerromantic on a technicality

but im aromantic. ive never experienced any sort of attraction. im not even sure if id label this romantic attraction, but its something very very very close to it. shes my world, i want to marry her and live with her and love her forever. she made me realise im not asexual (graysexual lesbian now!). im fine with our relationship being perceived as romantic, shes my partner, my lover, my significant other, were dating

except were not. and i feel so blinding bad for being that little bit uncomfortable with 'romantic'. and shes so nice, she doesnt even care about it, our relationship is just what it is, and labels are for my sake, mostly. she just wants me to feel comfortable, i know. and, shes my girlfriend. my girlfriend.

i post about her a lot. i cannot shut the fuck up about her, i mention her as often as i can because i just constantly think about her, i am, in all meanings of the word, incredibly lovesick. stupidly in love. but im aromantic. i post and talk a lot about being aromantic, its such a core part of my identity, ive helped irl friends discover their aromanticity. its the only flag ive up on my wall, ive a cardigan in aromantic colours, it was the only pride pin on my bag for a while

so i just... feel bad. because im aromantic. im aromantic. this relationship has not changed that. but ive gone from constantly talking about being aro and not understanding romance and always being annoyed by it and by people who are in love because i didnt understand how anyone could ever be like that. and im still aromantic, and i still stand by that romance should NOT be everywhere, but... i understand the people constantly talking about their significant others now, because im one of those people now. and it feels like a betrayal of myself. im someone who the past version of myself would find annoying beyond comprehension

it feels like im betraying the aromantic community and my aromantic identity, because im an aromantic person who found love that is functionally romantic. how can i talk about being aro when my every other post is about my lovely amazing girlfriend? how can i wear the aro flag if im in a relationship? how can i reblog posts about the aromantic experience when im just... not perceived like that anymore?

i feel like a traitor. im so sorry.

-⭐anon

You're not a traitor, I promise, Anon. Be careful with labels that you're not letting them box you in. Aromantic doesn't mean you're not allowed to have a partner or care about them a lot, in whatever way you do care them. And whatever your current relationship or your current feelings, none of that takes away from your aromantic experiences and feelings.

One of the big reasons why the label aro exists at all is because alloromantic society boxes us in, and tells us we have to experience things related to relationships, romance, etc. in a certain way and do them in a certain way. By doing things your way, using your labels, such as aromantic and queerromantic, and allowing yourself to feel a connection to the aro community are all ways of breaking out of that box and letting you do things your way and experience things in a way that's right for you.

Remember that aromanticity isn't a rejection of having partners, it isn't a rejection of love, some aros even experience romance in some circumstances or in their own way which may not be exactly how it is for alloromantics, but still valid (not to say whether this is the case for you or not, only you can decide if your current feelings are actually romantic or not, but instead to say that you're still good either way). Instead aromanticity is a way that you can take ownership of these things and make your own decisions whether these things are right for you or not, whether you want to participate in them or not, how you want to participate in them, etc. So long as you are doing things in a way that works for you, and you are being true to yourself and what you personally want, you're not betraying the aro community.

Remember too Anon, that there are so many ways to be aro. And your way is valid and it matters too.

I'm sorry you've been feeling so stressed about this, but I hope this helps, or at least gives you another perspective to consider.

All the best, Anon, and take care!

[hollowed-theory-hall]

Can you talk about your thoughts on hinny? I have no problem with people shipping it but to me personally it just doesn't work. It feels like Rowling tried too hard or maybe just wasn't good at writing romance and messed it up. Maybe it was too rushed? The ship doesn't work for me but I'd love to hear your views.

Okay, sorry it took a while to answer this, I actually have a lot of thoughts and I have posts on some of them that I hope to get out soon-ish. I also wanted to go back to the books to make sure I'm not talking out of my ass. But I don't like Hinny, never did. And my reasons are kinda divided into three categories.

Disclaimer: I don't have anything against anyone who ships hinny, it's just really not my thing and I don't see it working with the way I see their characters.

And that's like the core of it. I just don't see Harry and Ginny as compatible on a character level. That and their relationship never really read as believable to me in the books.

The 3 categories I mentioned are:

Harry's character

Firstly, I think Harry is gay. Not bi, but gay. I think he was never actually attracted to a woman and I have a whole post to prove it. So, because that's how I read his character, I just can't really see him with any girl.

(Now, I don't think JKR intended for Harry to come off as gay, but he did)

Secondly, he never thought about Ginny, like, up until book 6, and even during large portions of book 6, he just isn't thinking about Ginny as a potential romantic interest. And when he does think about Ginny in the final two books it never reads like he really likes her. It reads like they decided they are dating, but I don't think Harry knows why he supposedly likes her. He just decided he does, but doesn't know why. It was kind of the same with Cho, where he said he had a crush on her and was nervous around her, but if you asked Harry what he likes about her, his answer would be: "Ehh...."

Like, Harry doesn't really seem to know why he's dating Ginny, and neither do I. It's just how it's written.

2. Ginny's character

So, this is again my opinion, but I don't like Ginny. I just don't like her character. I wish her off the page whenever she talks.

And, when it comes to shipping, for me, I need to find both the characters involved interesting and fun for me to explore to ship them together and care about the pairing. As I don't like Ginny and don't really care for her, I can't really ship her with anyone, not really. It's not even like I hate her (not the way I hate Dumbledore), I just find a lot of her actions and behavior iffy and she annoys me more often than not.

I'm not going to list everything I don't like about Ginny (some of it appears in the rest of this post). But her treatment of Fluer, for example, really soured her character to me. Like, sure, Ginny's young, but, she's 15, and by that point, I think she should take responsibility for being awful to Fluer who was nothing but nice to all of them. Envy is not a good look for Ginny.

3. How they are portrayed together

Like I mentioned in the Harry section, their romance just never really felt there to me. The descriptions were off and left me feeling annoyed at their scenes together more than anything else.

Again, I'm writing a more comprehensive post about it, but the gist of it is that Harry's thoughts about Ginny in books 6 and 7 are weirdly detached for a supposed crush at best or outright uncomfortable for me to read at worst.

Now, we know Harry can describe characters he finds attractive in greater detail. There is none of that detail with Ginny. He only mentioned her hair color and that her hair is long and smells nice. Like, he doesn't talk about her eye color, her facial structure, eye shape (like he does sometimes with characters he does find attractive) — nothing. He doesn't even call her pretty once! At least he referred to Cho Chang as pretty twice in the series.

In the books there is never a scene (not even one) that convinces me they should be together. Like, they have no chemistry. They kinda remind me of Ron and Lavender tbh. They make out and are present in the same space often, but they never talk. Not really. I don't think Ginny actually knows Harry all that well because he never honestly talks to her about anything real. They don't really have chemistry or a relationship, they're just together. At least, that's how I always saw them.

And yes, Harry has his jealousy moments (that are portrayed so weirdly I always narrow my eyes at them to make sure they were actually there, but that's a whole other post about Harry's chest monster of jealousy), but he still doesn't really explain what he finds in Ginny. He doesn't mention she's attractive or pretty at any point, nor does he mention anything he particularly likes about her personality (except that she doesn't weep like Cho and is good at Quidditch. Neither of which are particularly good basis for a relationship).

Like, Ginny mentions why she likes Harry and that she does multiple times. Harry by contrast, just feels so incredibly uninvolved in his own relationship, to me.

Also, personally, I just find the setup of their relationship iffy. Like Ginny outright says she never gave up on Hary and always knew they'd end up together. It means, that since she was 11 (or earlier), she was crushing on Harry, never gave up on her crush, and considered them ending up together fate. She dated other guys to make Harry jealous and pay attention to her, and that's just really gross. I don't like her long obsessive crush on Harry or her treatment of the other guys she dated on her way to get Harry.

Proof of that, for those wondering:

“I never really gave up on you,” she [Ginny] said. “Not really. I always hoped. . . . Hermione told me to get on with life, maybe go out with some other people, relax a bit around you, because I never used to be able to talk if you were in the room, remember? And she thought you might take a bit more notice if I was a bit more — myself.”

(Half-Blood Prince, page 647)

She literally said she dated other guys so Harry would take notice of her. That just grosses me out.

So, no, I don't like Hinny (or Ginny).

[sunsetsover]

I'm asking you because I like reading your opinions, this is about kantbison before the beach ep: I've been thinking how can you love someone when you don't trust them? kant was supposedly head over heels for bison but he was very scared of him. What are your thoughts?

oh i'm so flattered to hear you like reading my opinions !! and i'm so sorry it took me so long to get to this ask !! and also i'm so grateful you sent me this meaty ass question to sink my teeth into, i'm sorry if i went off the deep end a lil but i LOVE thinking about things like this !! it opens up such a philosophical can of worms in my brain is probably not at all what you wanted or expected but i have to live my truth, i hope you understand <3

so in my view, you very much can love someone without trusting them. you can love someone without even liking them. you can love someone and treat them like shit. you can love someone and have nothing to do with them at all. this is bc, as far as i see it, love as a feeling and love as an action and love as a relationship (of any kind) are three different, separate, distinct things that don't necessarily overlap. in order to have a functional, healthy relationship all three need to be in alignment ofc, but love in and of itself as an emotion and feeling we have for someone/something can and does exist in isolation from literally everything else. it's why we can still love someone who a bad person, who treats us badly, or why we can love someone and still treat them badly. it's why we can love people who aren't there anymore, or stop loving people who are still in our lives, loving us. love the feeling and love the action aren't the same thing.

which kind of opens up into a bigger conversation about unconditional love, right? like some people believe in unconditional love and some think it's not actually possible - love always has conditions. i disagree. i think unconditional love is real, but i think people don't know how to recognise the difference between love the feeling and love the action and love as a relationship, or if they do then they don't know how to differentiate where one ends and another begins. so it becomes a whole thing of like 'well unconditional love can't exist while still having boundaries or limits' but that's not true. just because you love someone doesn't mean you have to put up with any kind of bullshit behaviour. putting in boundaries or even cutting someone out of your life completely doesn't negate love the feeling. you can love someone unconditionally and never want to see them again in your life because those are two separate things.

and that circles back to your question: how can kant love bison when he doesn't trust him? how can he love someone he's scared of? and my answer is that love the feeling exists outside of logic and sense. bc you're right - logically kant had no reason to love bison. sure bison was pretty and fun to be around and great in bed, but he's also a murderer. he's a hitman. he's violent. he's capable of things beyond comprehension. kant is very, very aware of all of that. and even more than all of that, kant knows bison is his ticket to freedom. logic dictates that you don't fall in love with the man standing between you and your - and more importantly, your baby brother's - future. kant loving bison jeapordises everything he worked so hard for. it puts his and babe's life at risk in every sense of the word. who tf is gonna fall in love with bison, knowing all of that?

but love exists outside the realm of logic. you can't reason with love. you can't sit love down and go 'no, not him, it can't be him, anyone but him'. if you could i'm sure everyone's lives would be so much easier, and our hearts would be a lot less damaged. but we can't. love does what it wants. in a lot of ways humans are completely at the mercy of love (or its lack), and i could go on a whole nother tangent about that but i'll spare you that one lmao. but my point is this: kant loved bison because he couldn't help it. he tried so, so hard not to, but you can control love about as well as you can control the sea, which is to say you can't. kant did love bison, and he did it because he had no choice. if he did, he never would have chosen bison.

BUT although love the feeling kind of exists in isolation, we as people don't. and so although kant couldn't help but fall in love with bison, he's also not an idiot. he knows it's stupid and dangerous. he knows bison isn't to be trusted. he knows exactly what bison is capable of, what he could do to him and to babe if he found out the truth. just bc your logical brain has no say in what love does, that doesn't mean it stops functioning. so yeah kant falls more in love w bison with every moment they spend together, but that doesn't stop the alarm bells ringing in his head going STOP! DANGER! ARE YOU FUCKING STUPID! kant knows he's stupid. he expresses that he's stupid for feeling the way he does about bison. but he also knows he can't help it. which is why he was so desperate (and by extension reckless) about finishing the job and getting away from bison asap. he knew what was happening, and he knew he couldn't stop it from happening unless someone or something else stopped it for him.

and so you end up with kant, falling head over heels with bison, and yet not trusting him either. kant who loves bison and is still deeply scared of him. yknow?

i hope this made sense and answered your question at least a little bit. i realise i took a bit of a detour to get to my point but i feel like in order to explain my thought process properly i had to kind of explain my philosophy on love. which is probably overkill but i hope it gave you some food for thought at least ! and thank you again for coming to me w this, it was so much fun to chew on <3

[ilions-end]

i've been mulling over the absence of the concept of writing in the homeric epics. it's one of those things that's just fun trying to wrap my head around, especially when these epics are presented to me as text on a page.

the one single potential reference to writing is in the iliad when glaucus mentions "a folded tablet inscribed with many murderous symbols" that made the lycian king know that he should kill bellorophon. i love it as a (possible) attempt to describe a written letter to an audience that is not so much illiterate as pre-literate (?), with no real concept of a common alphabet used to convey meaning. beware this tablet with deadly symbols on it! it reminds me of those early internet infomercials and the challenge of describing a major leap in technology to laypersons ("did you know this gizmo can send an electronic letter to someone's screen on the other side of the world in seconds" type thing)

it's brought to mind in the lot drawing scene too, when the achaeans are deciding who should duel hector. when ajax' lot is picked, the herald doesn't know whose lot it is, because it's not like ajax (or any of the other heroes) have written their names or initials on the stones, because that's not a thing yet! they've drawn personal marks, and ajax' mark is shown to each hero one by one until ajax can see it and claim it as his. (personally i like to think he drew an elongated diamond shape or rectangle to represent his shield :3)

this is also why i roll my eyes whenever someone wants to do a big gotcha on the odyssey by asking "well why didn't odysseus (or menelaus, or someone else) just write penelope a letter at some point". genuinely bold of you to assume that odysseus (or penelope, or any ithacan or argive, or anyone in these stories) knows how to read or write, or even has a concept of a large-scale comprehensible way to convey complex ideas through nonfigurative symbols

[acid-ixx]

If you don’t mind me asking, what does your planning process look like for your chapters and what do you write first?? I’m trying to write my own Ybatfam fic rn but I just don’t know what to add to my chapters and really just how to start them.

I love your work, your really the one who inspired me to try writing my own🩵🩵🩵

hii anon !! i'm glad u asked this, though i am no way an expert in writing, i've been doing so for years now and i've learned quite a lot from it. thanks for asking this and i hope this is comprehensive enough 😭

so when it comes to planning for a chapter, or just a one-shot, i always write out what i want to establish within it. ask yourself; what does the chapter center around? would it be the relationships with characters, or the emotions you want to portray, is it angsty or just hurt/comfort? in planning, i write the general gist of what will happen through the entire thing (read: planned fanfics) before i move on to outlining.

and here, outlining helps like a god. i like to separate a chapter into multiple parts, and combine them altogether in the end. so when it comes to outlines, i just write out what i want to write and not the actual dialogue or actions in it (example: in this scene, jason tries to talk it out with you, you fight back and force him to let you out. in the next part, you're of the apartment and near to breaking down, you don't notice two sets of eyes watching over you).

sometimes, if i'm ever stuck i just write in the middle or the end because it helps me establish a flow and the build up.

also, setting the settings, changing the atmospheres, adding parallelism, and using figures of speech (simile, metaphors, personifications, etc. (e.g. conner knows you're perfect, with just how the flowers at the manor sings for your presence or how the beams of sunlight always directs itself at you)) are really helpful for when my writing feels dry or doesn't feel as compelling. it's not always required but it helps adding flowery (but not-so much) words or relating characters into objects with symbolisms to give readers an even deeper insight of who the characters is and why they are like that.

writing for the actual chapter, even starting it is always going to be the hard part. it's like starting an essay, but i suggest treating it like an essay— what do you want to focus on? always remember that the start of a chapter helps set up the mood and pacing of the story, so whether it'd be action packed or something lighthearted, reflect it upon the flow of your words too.

start with an interesting hook, whether it'd be rhetorical questions or digging deep into a character's personality and diving into specifics about it, have key points and expound upon it; and always take note of the atmosphere of how your entire story should be, show it through actions, reactions, gestures and dialogues.

otherwise, i've not much to say but take your time and don't pressure yourself with trying to achieve perfection. i'm pretty much someone who likes to write out my ideas before the actual planning so most of the time i wing most of what i want to write (loving family, unpalatable desire is a product of it) and hope to god that whatever outcome will be decent.

and thank you so much anon for finding me as an inspiration 🥹 it's unbelievable, the amount of support i mean— and if you ever do wish to post your own fic and feel doubtful of it still, you can always also chat me through my chatbox here in tumblr since it's pretty much open for anyone.