One of the great things about fiber arts (at least to me) is that... you outright own the things you make. It's hard for me to comprehend actually owning something, and that's that. The item you have created doesn't need to come with strings attached (pun intended).
In a world where you are constantly buying things but not owning any of it, truly, it's such an odd experience to actually have ownership of your labour, time, and love like that.
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yeah, sure, I have a life
(if anyone with actual music knowledge sees this please hmu because I have no clue what I'm doing and I'm pretty sure I'm wrong in some places)
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Sorry for disappearing again. I’m popping back on here to give a little update on my life for anyone who cares. August was a really really reallyyy awful month for me. First I was spiraling abt my ex situationship and then the first wk of the semester I started dealing w a lot of harassment from classmates and I realized it was my own “friends” that started it and spread a bunch of awful untrue rumors abt me as well as my private text conversations w them 😃 And the stress from all of that literally caused me to have a psychotic episode and spiral even more so that was fun. I actually came close to ending my life bc it was so bad. I think that was the first time I’ve ever had a full blown psychotic episode and it was absolute hell, like I’ve never been so fucking terrified in my life. I didn’t even know it was possible to have thoughts as dark as the ones I was having. This caused me to fall really behind in my classes so now I’m having to catch up while also being very scatterbrained. And this WAS going to be my last semester but now I’m gonna have to graduate later bc of all of this 🥰 It literally feels like they sabotaged me right before the finish line like I’ve never been so pissed off in my life. But one good thing that came out of it is I’ve now figured out I probably have schizotypal personality disorder or sth similar which would explain why I have such a hard time making friends and maintaining relationships. I think I come off a lot colder than I mean to and so I give ppl mixed signals on accident. It’s kind of awful knowing I’M actually the one that’s caused some of my relationships to implode without meaning to. Like I try soooo hard to be as nice as possible and to listen and be patient w ppl but it’s still somehow never enough bc I’m kinda stoic and am not good at expressing my love for ppl. Like I feel so many things internally but it’s hard for me to show them externally. And I also figured out that I experience apophenia (which can be related to psychosis and schizophrenia) and so I sometimes read way too much into things and see signs and patterns that aren’t there. On one hand it’s great bc it allows me to learn difficult concepts really fast and spot patterns and connections other ppl might not see, but on the other hand it can also cause me to experience psychosis. I’m trying to be more careful now w how delusional I let myself be but I’m not gonna stop analyzing music and I’ll let myself be delulu sometimes as a treat bc life is more fun that way :)) I’ve made several playlists that kind of serve as journal entries since I don’t really journal and that’s the closest thing I have to journaling. These songs are like the soundtrack of my life at the moment
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i took a few liberties but... Sunday-inspired playlist!
some highlights:
master of the heavenly yard (off-vocal) (mothy/akuno-P)
portrait of the pirate F (hitoshizuku-p)
rock in god's shoe (sushi soucy)
worst case scenario (the hoosiers)
but never a key (dirt poor robins)
hello my old heart (the oh hellos)
rule #35 - microphone (fish in a birdcage)
into the unknown (over the garden wall)
collared (vane lily)
taixu (sasakure.uk , lasah)
ship in a bottle (fin)
a couple ender lilies OSTs
a few omori OSTs
a few hsr (penacony) OSTs
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Aha, my first one for Valentine's Day Week! I'm excited about this one!
Introducing Abner Holloway and Cordelia Clayton... also known, one day, as the Woodsman and the Woodsman's Wife.
See, back in October, I decided I wanted to draw the two of them when they were young. That of course meant I had to give them names...
Long story short, expect the first of a fic in the coming week. :P
So, them. The way I like to describe it is that Cordelia fell in like first, and Abner fell in love first. She stops by and talks to him while he's working every week, and he mainly listens. It takes her a long time to realize why he replies so little.
They are GOOD KIDS okay
There's so many little moments between them that I came up with, but here's one I drew:
Cordelia cheerfully waves hi to a startled Abner. As soon as Cordelia turns her back, humming happily, he tugs his hat down over his face, blushing furiously.
I could say so much about them, but I think I'll wait on that until I start posting the fic. However, I'll add one more thing: this song is inextricably linked to their story in my mind.
(Also, general note, I'm not the first on here to have made a young/named version of the Woodsman and his wife (see here). But I definitely support more content for these two, so take a look!)
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