#why do i have to fucking know whats an american state and what isnt i genuinly dont want to know but thst information is literally

[playingonedchess]

with americans stupid habbit of treating their states like countries maybe i should do that for every region in every country like yeah so Kielce, Świętokrzyskie Voivodeship is definitely more than 1000km away from Ganzhou, Jiangxi

[timeisacephalopod]

In relation the that true crime post I made yesterday, does anyone know good true crime YouTubers who aren't fucking weirdos about crimes, criminals, and constantly advocating for higher prison sentences acting like Americans??

If you say Princess Weeks I already follow her and if you don't it's not all true crime that just comes up go watch her shit she's very informative and let me to the In The Dark podcast, which is also very good

[absolutedestinyapocalypsse]

i think we're all in agreement that larian fumbled wyll's storyline but what i cannot drop after finishing my playthrough is how fucking strange his relationship to the flaming fists is???

like if you take him to kill the fists at the foundry he disapproves? these are the people who are actively torturing and enslaving the gondians to make massive police brutality robots. you can literally go to the foundry and WITNESS the steel watchers brutalizing children via tadpole but in the final battle ravengard's "help" is a bunch of fists whose job it was to protect the steel watchers? Literally all the flaming fists do is get in your way, try to arrest you for stopping murders, and run away from danger and Wyll is just endlessly supportive of it- he doesn't see why that's fucked up!

I get that they're his dad's guard and his inability to criticize his father for anything could have (should have) been a plot point, but instead it's just there! uncritically!! And i can kind of get it when it has to do with him being exiled bc parent child relationships are complicated, but there is literally no reason for him to be dickriding the flaming fists so much. Absolutely zero reason.

They set Wyll up as being this unfailingly moral character who would gladly become a devil before killing an innocent person, even when killing that innocent person is in the "rules" he's supposed to follow. He's not just uncritically obedient of Mizora even though she tells him that what he's doing is right, but when it comes to the flaming fists who are purposefully incompetant at best, and actively murderous at worst, and whom we have watched the entire game actively enable slavery and state violence he just doesn't care????

These are the flaming fists who were completely fine sending Florick to the gallows for trying to fight against their corruption and save ravengard. Devella is the ONLY person in the fists who's doing anything to address the bhaal killings and her colleagues actively get in her way/try to stop her from investigating them. If I were Wyll and I learned that my dad was fucking brainwormed bc the guard that was supposedly "unfailingly loyal" to him sold him out and actively stopped a rescue attempt, i would never want to see another fucking flaming fist in my life.

But instead at the epilogue party if he's the blade of avernus hes just like "my dad pardoned all the fists and made them pinky promise to do better :) isnt he great?" Be for real!

It's making me mad bc it's not the hypocrisy itself that's the problem, it's that they don't even attempt to say or do anything about it! It's a golden opportunity for Wyll to have to do some self reflection and grow as a character, like every other character who also has clear moments of hypocrisy like this. It's right there! And the game just totally chickens out. Like I know that not every country has the same relationship to police that Americans do, but it's literally IN THE GAME that the flaming fists are a corrupt organization who operate exactly like the american cops do. Larian please give Wyll a backbone to begin with, or make him reckon with the fact that he doesn't have one. Do fucking SOMETHING!!

[animentality]

I'm sorry.

I'm just laughing over like... overwatch fans being mad at me for saying their game isn't that fucking great at queer rep.

it has TWO LGBT characters who were openly LGBT as SOON AS THEY WERE RELEASED.

that's fucking Lifeweaver, added to the game in 2023, and Venture-

a fucking nonbinary character who ISNT in the game yet.

do you understand why this is laughable?

overwatch has been around for 8 fucking years and it took a fucking sequel to force them to reveal characters were queer from the get go.

for the past 8 years, they've been queerbaiting mercy and pharah, while hocking how canon gency is, they have been teasing roadhog and junkrat, barely, and I guess.

if you MUST defend blizzard.

you can say well it's ok they did reveal tracer was a lesbian on Twitter and then they admitted soldier 76 was gay literally 3 years after he was released, and then they made pharah a lesbian and baptiste bisexual- literally 7 years after pharah was released and 4 years after Baptiste was.

yeah.

so progressive revealing that in random comics and lore bits that barely show up in game, if they ever do. and I haven't played overwatch in a while, because I have a high degree of respect for myself, but from what I fucking remember, soldier doesn't say shit about his boyfriend, if he even has one, tracer only makes a reference or two to Emily, who might as well be her sister with how mild it was.

and I vaguely recall Baptiste flirting with ana. and pharah as far as I know has never ever said anything about all the hot chicks she dates on the side.

and that's it.

that's your amazing queer rep.

you have two queer characters from the start who were not retroactively made gay, and one hasn't even been released yet.

good work, blizzard.

so revolutionary.

y'all know blizzard is an American company and gay marriage has been legal in the US since 2015?

whereas apex legends literally started OFF in 2019 openly stating hey this character is trans and this one is nonbinary and this one is gay and this one is a lesbian and these TWO literally hit on men and women- oh also the pansexual and nb PLAYABLE CHARACTERS are dating and they flirt and dote on each other in game-

but I'm getting flak from you weirdo blizzard fans who for some reason think blizzard is worth your devotion?

even if it was good at queer rep, I am not sure if fucking blizzard and OVERWATCH 2, one of the biggest monetary scams in all of gaming are the hills you want to die on.

but at least you'll be dead.

[captainstarburst]

hey can you tell me more about captain starburst. I think he's really cool hehehe

YES ID LOVE TO. i made a big post about him here a little bit ago, but i always love the opportunity to infodump so i will try my best to give a full summary of aaaalllll his stuff. under the cut of course. warning for some body horror? esque stuff because i talked about his weird body

SO starting off i'm actually gonna talk a bit about nix, because starburst is an AU of him. nix is a god from a place called the purpose, and his story has a few similar themes to starb's. they both have a lot of focus on guilt after hurting others. nix, as opposed to starb, is a lot more aloof and at times abrasive, while starburst is overly cutesy and joyful. nix is a god that was forced into a "hero" position (more of a villain in the broader scope of things, but told what he was doing was for the greater good) while starburst has dedicated his life to heroism. they both started in a similar place, but diverged, with nix turning towards more selfish goals and starb forcing himself to be nothing but selfless. i should probably make some kind of big summary post for nix too at some point since i feel like people know less about him even though hes like, the first one, but that's besides the point.

he comes from a universe called superverse, which is a collaborative setting between me and a bunch of friends. it's basically just Supheroes With Capitalism, most heroes are there for show and entertainment exclusively, even if that's at the detriment of those in surrounding. specifically, he was made by a company called AMOEBA, who makes furries and sells them as tools, or otherwise less than people. they grow them in tubes LOL. starburst was made to be handed off to.. i just say The Government there isnt really anything specified there because i dont know government stuff. but they wanted to use him destructively, just to do whatever for their gain. cartoonishly evil american government you know. he was their first project, and quite literally an explosive failure. when he was born he exploded the entire building he was made in. his body's kind of fucked up and so are his powers!

in terms of his biology, the most notable thing about that part of him is that.. his body's full of a SUPER strong acid, and that's used almost exclusively to? destroy his own organs. if theres too many. because his body ALSO regenerates his organs, and like, makes multiple of them. that's why he has two hearts! it doesn't happen all the time, but sometimes he just gets a new organ. and if he has too many his body gets rid of some extra ones! it doesn't hurt him, but i imagine it probably feels.... weird. but that's why he has two hearts!

all of his powers are emotion based, and EXTREMELY volatile. when he's feeling any kind of strong emotion, including positive ones, and doesn't have it in check, he's at risk of just.. generally being way too strong, leaving holes in things or breaking stuff he grabs, he generates warmth in states like that and if it comes to too much of a head he will quite literally explode. he can also create stars, big or small, think like.. the variety of sizes that plates come in. when he's in control of his emotions, the stars are round and glow a warm yellow, and when he's not, they're pointed and sharp and more of a gray/white. when he's excited he also tends to have little glowing floating stars appear around him! he also has slow falling and healing powers, both that he has to be calm and focused to use. for specifically his healing, he has to make a wish to use it (like wishing on a star).

he was on his own for a while after he came out of the tube, wandering aimlessly before eventually becoming enraptured by the idea of heroism and helping people. he didn't really understand that heroes were just for show, and that influenced how he went about his career later down the line.. but early on, any time he tried to help people, it just ended in fire or explosions or some sort of harm coming to other people. he has a lot of guilt and repressed feelings because of this, and it took him a long time to learn to control his powers.

i use him in roleplays with my friends, and i ALSO use nix in those roleplays. the reason he was able to control his powers was because of nix helping him learn, and the two getting closer and eventually dating. he has a lot of partners and a lot of his story beats around him meeting these people he ends up caring so much about and helping them, and in turn learning more about himself.

i go over this in the post i linked above so i'll try to be brief, but along with him learning to control his powers, the first big thing that skyrockets him into being a known hero is when AMOEBA comes after him. they kidnap people, get him to come back to them, he ends up stabbing the guy in charge in self defense trying to free those people, and eventually does get out with them. AMOEBA is never punished for this, but they do leave starburst alone after that.

before he was a recognized hero, though, he met another AMOEBA creation, russian roulette. they WERE successfully used as a government weapon, and mistreated greatly. they captured starburst at one point, then they both broke out, and then they got too scared of being close to someone and they ran away from him. they were recaptured and promptly punished, and with nowhere to turn their anger at the situation, they started blaming him for what happened to them. for a long while the two had a really long running thing of getting into fights or chases or whatever but russian roulette never actually having it in them to hurt him. eventually they both get trapped together and still they refuse to kill him, which leads to them eventually talking it out and both of them agreeing they don't really want things to change, but they don't want to actually fight anymore. they're also something like partners?? but not exactly. its complicated and starburst has a lot of strange relationships with people where he just doesn't mind them being weird or trying to hurt him in the past hes a weird little guy LOL

a similar thing happens to him with another hero, villian spectasy (his hero name is hocus pocus.) villian comes from wealth due to his father being semi-famous, and is a little bit.. too self centered for his own good. the two enter into a business partnership after handling a fight well together, that kind of just ends up as villian turning starburst into his sidekick.. while the two also get into a romantic relationship. eventually they get into a disagreement publicly, culminating in starb telling villian he doesn't want to be his sidekick anymore. villian's whole thing is him kind of learning to be a better person, and i didn't wanna just like.. leave him stranded after doing a bad thing, and i also like him, so he and starb don't break up. starburst really wants to see him become a better guy, and villian really wants to be better because of that. and eventually he'll learn to be better for just. the sake of it. i think it's sweet.

and FINALLY, i will talk about tesla and scelestic. both are owned by my friend @apotheoseity!! scelestic is a villain organization, one of the bosses there (TISM) turns people with powers into tools and what have you. not a good explanation ask him more about it LOL. but starb gets kidnapped by them, mostly so TISM can harvest the aforementioned acid in his body and turn it into.. weird acid grenades. that's not the important part though, while he's there he meets teslacoil! who is tism's adopted snake son. the two get REALLY gay really fast, despite.. the kidnapping? and the evil surgery, and all the villainy stuff? starb just gets googoo gaga about him. it culminates in starburst getting kicked out of being kidnapped for being too gay LMAO. but the two kept in contact and eventually got married! they're the perfect couple, despite how beautifully strange they are. starb also eventually ends up reconciling with TISM after he marries tesla, and now he's just TISM's weird son in law.

i wanted to focus on specific story beats with characters and plots, and thus the timeline for this is kind of incorrect. the actual order of events is more like this: early starburst stuff, before he meets much of anyone -> he meets russian roulette and they're together for a bit before they run off -> he gets with nix -> AMOEBA comes back for him and he solves that whole thing -> he gets kidnapped by scelestic and meets tesla -> he and tesla get married -> he and villian have their whole thing -> he and rouls reconcile

he also has some other connections i didn't touch on- his adopted son is @apotheoseity's maya, and he's also a father figure to @pbjpuppy's flicker. he's also dating his motorcycle (it's name is the star strider), a big slime guy named glumby (from another plot with villian), and @pbjpuppy's vinny!

and very important hes ME! hes a representation of a lot of stuff to me, and also just... literally a representation of me, i represent myself as him more often than not (and nix, he just tends to be the cuter of the two i guess?) he carries a lot of guilt with him, and in general pushes himself to be something that's soft and cute and nice for others, and disregards a lot of his own feelings. he does almost nothing but work, and even if his work is exclusively helping others, he still does nothing but doing things for other people and not himself. and that's really important to me. i imagine in the future he'll grow into better habits, but right now his flaws are very meaningful to me.

this is SO SO long im sorry. theres so much to this guy and theres so much to. everything i write and all my characters. but if you read it all THANK YOU!! i don't usually talk this in depth about my characters, and it can feel a little vulnerable to do so, but i want them to be enjoyed to their fullest. and thank you for asking about him it means so much to me that people wanna know more about my stuff!!!

[freyjuseggr]

in my personal (American) experience, any "small business" big enough to have employees but small enough to not have to listen to labor laws (under 50 employees) is run by fucking ghouls who are actively anti-employee rights and who vote that way. if it's like, one person on etsy or at the farmers market selling their goods that's one thing but anyone who makes themselves a boss can and should be stolen from. infinite growth is the ideology of a cancer cell etc etc, if they love their product so much and don't want it to get stolen they should sell online if i'm being honest!

okay so im a bit short on time so at risk of coming across as, somewhat defensive, im going to directly quote an example from my life rather than try to pretend im not doing that, this isnt defensiveness though, im simply trying to understand.

1 it has not been my experience that size of a company has any correlation with being able to ignore labor laws, and in fact the larger the company is, the more likely they would be to know exactly what laws they could break and bend to avoid getting in legal trouble because they can afford a legal team. and also the risk of bringing up any kind of issue is much higher for an employee of a large corp, but maybe thats just me living in right to work states

2 my friend owns a business. the business model is directly based on providing a space for community. he owns a game "store" that is like 90% space to come in and play games. the LLC has 3 employees, of which he technically is one. he gets a salary from the LLC and it is not a lot. he already has a profit plan in place wherein a percentage goes back into the business to make it better and more functional for its purpose, and is going to start in the next year or so (he only just started this, and wasnt expecting to have hired anyone else yet) to have an employee profit sharing program where the remainder of profits from the LLC get split equally between employees.

i think the "infinite growth" here is primarily geared toward providing a service within the community, a space to exist in. do you extend this same attitude toward a bar? or coffee shop?

i know that this is a specific example for a general question, so i will add some more general stuff, but just a bit bc i gotta get to work. where should one sell things online? you mentioned etsy, should etsy, ebay, or amazon be getting a share of profits from online sales, why? what about a website where you pay for your own domain name? why is the online model better than having a brick and mortar storefront? because people who dont care are able to steal from it? why are we encouraging punishing the people who are significantly more likely to be affected by theft than corporations actively making our lives hell?

and also, to add, i know of a small business owner in my hometown, hes an ass and everyone hates him, and he owns a restaurant that is very successful. you cant steal from it, and its working out well for him. and hes well known for voting dem and also being the biggest ass. so i know they exist, but i still dont see how even if you could that stealing from him would count as direct action. you arent helping anyone really

[dappersautismcreature]

hey sorry this is super outta nowhere but i was scrolling thru the mcytconfessions blog n saw you saying youre a wilbur hater and im genuinely curious as to why?

this isnt me waiting to like. white knight him and bite your face off btw. i like wilbur but this *is* genuine curiosity pls dont be afraid lmfaoksdsdfkhf

ah yeah, sorry nonnie, and no worries. sorry for the rant ahead i just wanna lay it all out.

listen, its pure vibes, i dont really have an explanation for it. i liked him just generally for a while, but i watched a video where he talked about american gun control and it just came off super uck to me. like, a lot of british lefties have this weird thing where they will assume americans are all stupid just for kicks when we've actually been indoctrinated to think the way we do. i guess i just dont like seeing brits have political takes that are just pure "america needs to get its shit together" cause yeah bro we know, focus on whatever the fuck is up with ur government please. I feel like if i talked politics with wilbur soot he would be condescending as shit and basically explain to me what socialism is or whatever when its like, dude,, please. british lefties think they know more than the average young american, which is most of the time not true, or not something to insult someone over. (this is also because he reminds me of a shitty ex friend who was in the states for AMERICAN STUDIES but would just talk on and on and on about how dumb americans were -___-)

and its more than that, i never get idolization of people, like, online people. the closest ive come to it was technoblade maybe? gtws is pretty awesome too, bbh is low level idolization maybe. so it weirds me out when people are just in awe over him, makes my instincts go wild. im really not accusing him of anything, i know this is just the silly brain reacting silly. it just weirds me out. his fans do not know him, nobody's fans know the person, and yet they act like they do, and like he's gods gift to leftism and queerness when he is,, a cishet maybe-aro upperclass man from britain. nothing against him really.

oh, and his fans tick me off because theyre ALWAYS inserting him into things and just. listen, i dont like having to scroll through tons of wilbur fics in the qsmp tag when im just trying to get to some badboyhalo or etoiles centric fics. the man has been on the qsmp for like less than a week of playtime and he's the fourth most tagged character on the qsmp ao3 tag.

not to mention he gets dragged into other plots like "what if this actually happened to wilbur!" or "yeah but what if wilbur was there!" or my most hated "cant wait till this character meets wilbur because i cannot enjoy this media (which is about finding and enjoying a bunch of ccs) if it doesnt have my guy in it!" like i get it, you have a hyperfix or a special interest, ive been there, but maybe then go watch stuff he's actually in, instead of forcing him into a plot he really isnt that big a part of anymore.

people also praised his dsmp writing when it was,, average at best. honestly i think bbh's and the eggpire's writing did way more for the dsmp because they actually tried to include other people in the plot as much as possible, instead of just writing for you and a few of your friends. imo, c!wilbur was an ok character, like, nothing bad, but nothing extraordinary for me. utah is death, ok buddy got it, wow, insane. yeah yeah we've all been to the soul sucking pit of utah, haha i get it. << this is just pure salt ignore that lmao

oh and lovejoy didnt fuckin invent political indie rock, people need to get over themselves on that one.

so yeah, its just a thing of, i cant really bring myself to like him. the brain goes wonky when he's around. kinda wish i didnt like, get angry when he's on screen but idk i cant really stop myself. nothing againstt you if you like him, ill usually tag anyy wilbur neg with #wilbur crit so if you wanna mute that tag. i dont post it too often tho.

[doodlytoodly]

i rarely giggle with glee over stuff, its gotta be like absolutely preem stuff to me, so theres this alt history thing (Kaiserreich, Hoi4 mod, got alot of lore in it, basically Germany beat the entente in ww1, France and Britain became syndicalist, Russian revolution failed, the British government was exiled to Canada ((👎)) austria hungary is still around, also the ottomans, Italy is in 2 or 3 pieces cant recall rn, all that stuff, and america is not doing good at all ((I’m a loser btw did y’all know that))) and I just found a youtube channel all about it, with a little series goin on, i think theres only 2 episodes of it? Ive only watched the trailer but its got me all giddy about it, gonna watch the actual episodes tmrw cause its 3 am and i spent an hour typing all this (i edited this part after finishing the rest lol) its about the second american civil war which happens in this world cause america is all kinds of fucked up since they lost the war, i think there was also the great depression still, but theres also black monday after that (german stock market crashes, everyone that isnt syndicalist or whatever gets fucked over), america splits into quite a few shards (im not yhe best source for all this btw cause i like to play the version that is wackier and less realistic) ((i think in normal kaiserreich theres 7 factions in america, maybe 6, in the wackier version there can ve like 11)) anywya im pretty sure its the pacific states, which is the pacifc states of america ofc, they are progressives, social liberals, that stuff, there might be the western command center, that has the rockies, which is a split off of the federal government, same side of the civil war as the federal gov, idk if they exist in normal kaiserreich, (if they dont its just the actual federal gov who control it), they seperate the PSA from the American Union State, who has the midwest with texas and stuff i believe, their leaders huey long, (one of 2 i remember) in game their ideology is authoritarian democracy or smth, i think theres a lil bit of socialism goin on in there, idrk what their deal is in the lore i havent looked at them much, then theres the Syndicalists, who have the rust belt, they are ofc syndicalists, and below them is the constitutional american republic that controls the south, religious, racist, nutjobs, just imagine the confederacy 2.0, very L faction honestly (they usually get stomped in game <3) , in Washington D.C theres the federal goverment, I think run by macarthur after he takes charge for the war, or coups if some of the other factions get elected, they are the legitimate government, macarthur is still macarthur, and finally (if i recall correctly) theres New england, they control the new england area, ( they are controlled by the feds until they ask canada to come help them out, canada walks in, establishes new england ((in game as a puppet usually, once again i. am NOT the best source for this, they are usually just like normalish i think, idk prolly like the democrats in america today, but 1930s (in the wackier version they typically get taken over by hp lovecraft and go insane but thats all very non canon).

.

.

.

I have no idea where j was going with this, uhhh, im just gonna leave the trailer here for it cause why not, did I mention I get no bitches btw? cause this prolly psychically repells people without either of us realizing. anyway if anyone actually reads all my dumb rambling thanks for taking the time, if you didn’t and your only reading this, thanks for reading any of it at all, yeah.

[misterbitches]

You people are like omg im so different and radical. Let me vote for the president of the united states of america and get pissy when others dont want to for valid, non selfish reasons. The american people are not intelligent.

Idc vote but it isnt harm reduction. You are voting for someone to be the greatest butcher of the world. Palestinians are being exterminated. Black peoppe continue to he murdered by the state. We continue to get sick. People are still poor. Trans people are still being harmed. We are exploited and miserable and YOU are mad that people are being clear and principled when articulating the problem? I mean what do you people want. Honestly! Ugh!

Need to just focus on my stories. I’m just like lol all these ppl talmbout voting and you know their interest stops there. Cast your vote so you can go, “that’s enough activism for today!” No thanks!

On twt someone asked me “well what are YOU doing? Are you gonna organize?” And i said YES YOU FOOL! I “organize” (whatever that is) now! I went out of my way to start doing things irl. Then she was like seriously that’s great but most ppl dont. Do we not see the issue here with that? How about letting ppl know how to do so and actually getting active in their own lives to fix it! Why is most people dont so all we have is the vote? Do you want to do this every four years? They are literally telling us they dont care if we live or die. They have been. 2020 didnt change people the way they would like to think. It created spineless liberals who can discursively pretend they are more than that.

This is what we are dealing with. This is the truth. I fucking hate liberallssss HATE YOU HATE YOU HATE if they all collectively got off theie fucking asses we could see more but noooo you vote and march in the streets snd thats IT. No risk no sacrifice no love just the west and being a fucking impotent loser!!!!!!

[castlebyersafterdark]

perhaps you dont want to speak for an entire nation lmao, but im assuming youre american and if so, do you know why people assume that byler having sex is dirty, and do not see sex as an expression of love? how is love dirty? how is sexual experimentation dirty?

is sex ed not taught in schools over there? is religious paranoia really still that big of a deal in the US? are perhaps most of these people from southern or religious/homophobic states? or are they just people from all over the world who do not like the idea of accidentally conflating mike and will as children in earlier seasons with their older counterparts experimenting sexually? after all, if youre scrolling the tag all day, it's easy to see posts of young miwi/byler followed by highly explicit byler posts, and that can subconsciously fuck with your brain i guess.

but the show itself is obviously linear in terms of growth, so any story being told in canon isnt fucked up. i mean, they flashback, but their controversial creative choices are fantastic storytelling with reasons for being there, like nancy's virginity loss + barb's death. deliberately uncomfortable. but no part of byler being together and romantic is meant to make you uncomfortable. it should give you the happies.

Guilty! American all the way. And I mean this with genuine sincerity, it's kind of a huge and unfortunate reality of the state of things in this country. And many places around the world? I'd love to know where there's this seemingly so open-minded place that makes you question the mere possibility that people view gay sex negatively. Certainly interesting reality. I'd love if that was the case!!

"sex as an expression of love? how is love dirty? how is sexual experimentation dirty?" I MEAN, yeah!! That's the big question we've all been asking ourselves for... forever. To exhaustion.

Yeah, those who aren't backwards and bigoted and hateful don't view it like that, but even the most well-intentions hold prejudice as well. America? Constantly in a battle with the "traditional" values people, the extremist religious agenda, the conservatism that plagues the country. Yeah. It's pretty bad. Kind of a prevailing issue. Religious paranoia rules the land.

It's not even the sex-ed angle, because straight people are getting the kick in the teeth as well. If the public school system is failing the, admittedly, majority population on sex education, do you think gay kids stand a chance?? Hell no. My high school was barely passable above some of the crazy things I've heard that people "learn" in class, but I'd say most schools are teaching abstinence and barely covering the topic of anatomy properly. Basically taught us about how if we had sex we were all going to immediately catch diseases and then they made us watch a birth video and when it ended they just said. Don't have sex or those are your options. And then they spent a very long time teaching us all the street names of various drugs which was ridiculous, they were thorough. That's what it's like in a mild situation. And that's just my experience, and not universal. I've heard about better, and I've heard far far worse.

There's a lot to be said and has been said about the state of the fandom so I'm not going to dive into this all right now. Always trying to keep it positive and light and just do my thing and encourage others to do their things even if other people don't want them to. Being unrelenting against censorship and all that is the first step so. I don't know. There's a lot of good going on but there's a lot of problems, too. A lot of problems. For every instance where something feels progressive, just look around and there's something else that's combative. I try to do what I can and speak up and not dwell in stuff that thoroughly depresses me. I'm just one guy 😔 I mean, it's not bleak constantly, or everywhere, but the threats are very real...

[queen-zigzag]

trying to apply for practicum right now

that isnt an email. i cant just email Baker. thats not how it works

why is there two listings for the same place with the same contact, the only difference being the abbreviation?

also, this is specifically a listing for dartmouth, not halifax, which has a different listing for nscc with a different contact. if you dont know about nova scotia, dartmouth is a part of halifax because its in the halifax regional municipality along with bedford. in american terms, imagine if you were looking for jobs in new york, and the website you were applying through only showed you jobs in the city instead of the state. also the website is nyu. its not even consistent, because the counselling services for a university thats a turn off the bedford highway is listed as being in halifax even though its, yknow, in bedford.

whatever, i found erica bakers contact from their website (which wasnt linked, i had to seek it out myself) so lets-

oh. okay. my bad.

in my defense the website is almost designed to dance around the fact that they dont do counselling without outright saying it, i cant be the first person to make this assumption

whatever, i found erica baker-gagnon's page on some weird obscure mental health linkdin or something, lets see if they have a contact.

wh

what the fuck do you

but they

pedicabo ego vos et irrumabo

[borderlinehannibal]

(Unfinished) Top ten fics of the year!

Not counting dead dove content

These are all fics i threw in my bangers tag throughout the year :)) and now im sharing them with YOU! Also, these are in no particular order, because i can not rank these theyre too good <3

(*April edit! I nevee finished this post, but i still wanted to post it! So its just the six fics!)

1. For Whom the Bell Rings

“Why are you still here?” Xie Lian asked a small ghost flame. It was green with a purple tint, flickering in and out of existence, yet its core was oddly bright. The flame bobbed up and down slightly.

“There are people I care about greatly, and I want them to stay safe,” the ghost flame said, and Xie Lian felt distantly that he’d heard those words before somewhere.

Or: Jiang Yanli becomes a Calamity.

24k words, 20k hits and so fucking good it made me scream when it finished. If you give a single shit about Jiang Yanli and have even a passing recognition of TGCF, PLEASE READ THIS.

2. American Pie

Rodrick gets by on drums and hazing his little brothers and being alone in the basement while his family moves around upstairs. Sometimes you have to be thrown a life preserver before you realise you're not swimming, you're drowning.

14k words and 11k hits- A rodrick/OMC fic by my own best friend!!! And its so fucking good man, i love the character development, the fucking depression, the music, the family dynamics, the OC is so good it makes me tear my hair out, i just. Fuck, man. Read it.

3. Heap of Ashes That I Am

Sometimes, when Izuku allows himself to comprehend the sick reality of his life, he finds that it no longer resembles the roots from which he sprouts. He is a fickle rose bush that was cared for and raised and coddled in its early seasons by a loving mother, growing strong, interwoven roots and a reliable base. And, Izuku thinks, he would have been a lovely rose bush. He would have flourished and unfurled and oh wouldn't that have been nice?

Instead, along came Bakugou Katsuki: vegetation killer in a compatibly sized spray bottle.

But this is the life Izuku has. It is ugly and broken and unrecognizable and so unbearably his and, god, how Izuku wishes it wasn't. But it is. So he makes his peace.

or

Izuku finds out he has a revival quirk and uses the opportunity to become a vigilante.

226k words, 296k hits and it deserved every single one of them. Jesus H Christ, this fic is so good the characters, the angst, the development, the found family, the redemption, i just! I can't! Please!

4. Weaver of Silk and Dreams

Ben Parker sighed as he looked up into The Thing's eyes, so expressively human in spite of the rest of his rocky appearance.

“My fifteen-year-old nephew--who's practically my own little boy!--” he choked out with a tight voice, “h-he can't pass for human anymore. He's scared, and he's isolated, and he just needs someone else to talk to! Someone who can understand. Please."

_____

Some alternate realities are unrecognizable, and some are indistinguishable. This one lies somewhere in between.

Peter Parker's life was derailed when he mutated into a strange human/spider hybrid, and he knows that's not the way things went down for him in other realities. Still, he's determined to forge a new path and make the best of it. Sometimes "the friends we made along the way" really is the greatest treasure anyone could ask for.

73k words and 58k hits - look me in the eyes and tell me this isnt a perfect fic. The fucking. The fucking descriptions, the prophecies, the spider totem nonsense, the instincts, the ANGST, the fantastic four in general, ben and may my beloveds, and the endgame spideypool? Jiminy!

5. A Villain State of Mind

Written for the Norsekink prompt: "SHIELD has Loki in custody, with the gag on to keep him from spellcasting, but they don't really know what to DO with him. They can't give him food or water or attempt to interrogate him with the gag on, and they don't dare take it off. Their solution? Call in a telepath! But Charles Xavier may find more things in Loki's head than SHIELD bargained for..."

53k words and 14qk hits- Not just this fic, but this whole series are some of the biggest bangers ive ever read. Loki's slow drinking of the mutant family kool-aid, and coming to respect Xavier and care about shit and be cared about and just. Aughhh!!! Please read this series i will cry.

6. Monster Culture

Written for the 2014 Norse Big Bang.

When Loki is injured by Kurse in Thor: The Dark World, Thor pleads his case to the All-Father and Loki is given the chance to repay his wrongs on Midgard in the care of Bruce Banner. Over the course of a year, the two navigate the city of Boston and try to figure out what it means to be human and what it means to be a monster.

40k words and 10k hits- Bro dont even get me started i will cry i will actually cry. I know gammafrost isnt the most popular pairing but like this deserves so much more attention and love.

7.

[burntblueberrywaffles]

My 2023 recap (but it's through all my favorites posts I've made this year)

Part 2! (part 1 here)

Aug 14th

Me @ the prequels haters:

Aug 14th

Aug 18th

He did it for me specifically and I thank him every day ❤️❤️❤️❤️

Aug 20th

Me progressively spiraling in my latest sw posts:

Aug 26th

Discovering you’re ace is wild cause like, you guys were serious when you said you wanted to fuck that character/celebrity?

We weren’t just exaggerating and being silly?? UH???

Aug 27th

Watching the end of ROTS: a moodboard

Aug 30th

Having a R2d2 and C3po cameo might be the laziest form of Star Wars fan service but you know what that shit work my dumbass goes “OMG it’s R2 and threepio 🥺🥺🥺” everytime

Aug 31st

Tumblr staff be like: somehow they’re still using desktop, lets add an evil clown

Aug 31st

“I want the main character to end up with this person, even though I hate one of them who sucks and doesn’t deserve to end up with such a good-”

My brother in Christ call me crazy but I don’t think you actually love this ship. Read an x reader or x OC fanfic at this point jfc.

Sept 4th

Me sending a feedback report to complain every time tumblr makes another idiotic change:

Sept 10th

I’m always so scared to assemble it

Sept 15th

I love doing research, I am not tearing my hair out (lying)

Sept 21st

Im so good at forgetting my blorbo is a child murderer you wouldn’t even believe

Sept 29th

Lowest luminosity setting is not low enough why is my iPhone a fucking beacon of light burning my retina with the force of a thousand suns

Sept 30th

Me every few months:

Oct 4th

Oct 18th

Me reading fanfic titles on ao3 after first becoming a Taylor Swift fan:

Oct 28th

My boy was so sleep deprived this would have fixed him.

Oct 29th

Can’t believe you hate on my ship just because it’s toxic, unhealthy and has disastrous consequences for everyone around them. Grow up. 🙄

Nov 11th

I have beef with TCW Anakin

Nov 14th

When people go “ew why would you be into this ship when it’s toxic and problematic” and I’m just

Sometimes you don’t need another reason than "it makes my brain go brrrrr” it’s fiction babes it doesn’t have to be good or healthy ❤️

Nov 15th

I thought “oh it would be fun to randomly send a kitten picture to this one mutual” and then I went insane 🧍‍♀️🧍‍♀️ sorry about that besties

(this isnt a good post but since i'm making this as a 2023 recap I want to commemorate that time I sent kitties to all the beloved mutuals LOL)

Nov 18th

I love these “what do you most associate with [insert US state]” polls bc my non-American ass is always:

Baby I literally have no idea what you’re talking about ❤️

Nov 17th

hate when people are like “why would Padme be into cringefail Anakin it’s so unrealistic”

Like, um, CLEARLY she saw his pathetic weepy eyes and immediately decided she wanted to fuck that. What’s hard to understand.

Nov 20th

I think when you break up with someone their memory of you should be wiped men in black style thank you

Nov 22nd

Philosphy class be like

Nov 25th

Me when the known mass murderer starts murdering

#you’re telling me my genocidal babygirl is in fact genocidal???

Nov 26th

The thing about philosophy class is that most of these dudes you have to learn about just suck.

“Ohhhh humans only use each other and every relationship is only built on the potential advantages you can get from it” So your heart has never exploded thinking about how much you love your friends?? Sounds like a you problem.

Nov 28th

Snow being judgmental and having a constant sense of superiority…. brother you can’t even buy a new shirt HUMBLE YOURSELF

Nov 28th

Me starting the Ballad of songbirds and snakes and reading snow’s inner monologue: this guy sucks lmao I will NOT be rooting for him and Lucy Gray to be together 🙅‍♀️

Snow:

Me: oh goddamn it

Dec 1st

“I liked this thing before it was cool!“ Boohoo you’re not special. You just stumbled upon it before other people, congratulations.

"I still like this thing after it was cool, now that public opinion has shifted from being overly positive to considering it bad and cringe” now that takes strength. Courage. Who I aspire to be.

Dec 3rd

Snow: is always nice to Sejanus, helps him distribute food to the tributes, offers him a seat, gives him advice, CALLS HIM HIS FRIEND, save his life-

Also Snow: wtf this bitch thinks we’re friends????

#babyboy you are so stupid

Dec 4th

Me when I see my friend sadposting: I will smother you with kisses and love. Do you need me to kill someone btw

Also me, when I’m sad posting and friends send me encouragements: Friend??? 🥺 Friend cares about me??? 🥺🥺 friend wants to cheer me up? 🥺🥺🥺

Dec 7th

Tumblr rn feels like a landlord trying to make its tenant leave by not fixing shit and cutting utilities, but unfortunately for everyone involved, I am a rat

Dec 10th

No but seriously no one should try being tumblr famous, this website is for one thing only, and that’s having a silly time with your friends and mutuals 😤

Dec 12th

If your mutuals don’t say hi in the tags when they reblog one of your popular posts from someone else then what is it all for

Dec 12th

“Ew liking unhealthy ships is so toxic-”

“Actually toxic ship are INTERESTING unlike those boring healthy ships that have no flavour-”

Meanwhile me, who can appreciate and enjoy any ship dynamics:

Dec 18th

I’m like an old man shouting at clouds except I’m a 20 years old trying to make everyone listen to La Lumière by pomme asdagshdjfk

#I don’t think anyone is buying what I’m selling but I shall keep trying 😔

Dec 20th

Snow when being friendly to Sejanus results in becoming friends with Sejanus

#bro was really like: you’re telling me the person I’ve been treating well and interacting with regularly thinks I’m his friend??? #and that everyone else also think we’re friends???? #like yeah bby that is how friendship works ❤️

[ithisatanytime]

Charli XCX & Troye Sivan - 1999 [Official Video]

 im gonna try to give a couple more examples to clear up and hopefully summarize my point on mass shootings but well see how it goes

 first scenario, imagine the united states racial demographics were more like 99 percent jewish and one percent white, so basically an inversion of the racial demographics prior to unchecked immigration from mexico and ignoring blacks for simplicities sake. this may come as a shock to you, but i dont really feel personal predjudice against your average jew, and in fact i get along better and identify with them a little easier because im nuerotic and intellectual and a film buff etc. however if in that scenario i was the only white man in a school comprised entirely of jews and i either didnt realize i was jewish or didnt understand the extant of the difference between our two peoples, i might be tempted to do a mass shooting! why dont i have any friends? why am i so different? why are these guys such massive fucking perverts i mean i get horny too but im not gonna straight up grab some chicks ass on the back of the bus and make her cry just because shes there and i might get away with it! and likewise my jewish peers might wonder why im so prone to violent confrontation, why i care so little about money or academic accolades etc. now if i were say a chinese foriegn nationals son named ping attending this school, many of those same challenges would be remain but the source of the discomfort would be obvious to all and wed work a little harder to bridge the gap, when the difference between two peoples SEEMS either nonexistant or subtle but is in fact a wide gulf, and the reason isnt clear, you start running into serious issues. in that scenario im the same man i am now, and over all, im proud of the choices ive made, not all but on the whole im glad for the man i ended up being, but in that scenario i would be convinced that there was something DEEPLY DEEPLY wrong with me, after all its not allll the other students who are wrong and IM right, but then what? what human could just decide that happiness was never for them, comfort was never for them, and the literal torture they are subjected to by their peers are their own fault and they deserve it? no one will do this, no one does this. in this scenario suicide is the OBVIOUS answer, but if you have your heart set on dying you have nothing really to lose, so why not take out your tormenters who are alien to you to the degree that you cant even see them as human and they feel much the same way about you.

 the other scenario hopefully will be brief and parts of it arent gonna make a lot of sense, but if you get it you will much better understand the underlying point.

 pretend its the vietnam war still, white europeans are killing south east asians, and sure there were some vietnamese and blacks fighting on the americans side and some whites on the other, but almost every war is fought along ethnic lines and this is not a coincidence but the true purpose of war, it is the survival of the fittest competition when applied to highly social animals like us. imagine in this scenario the united states somehow transported american teenagers into vietnamese schools, but outwardly they looked vietnamese and had artificial vietnamese memories implanted to better fit it (LOOK I TOLD YOU IT WAS A SLOPPY METAPHOR JUST BEAR WITH ME) suppose one of these american sleeper cells just couldnt fit in with their peers, even though outwardly they were vietnamese inwardly they werent and they felt no kinship with these south east asian people beyond the most base layer of politeness. in his isolation, and inability to understand anyone around him, he snaps and shoots up his vietnamese school... mission accomplished?

 i know thats confusing as hell, but what im getting at is these jew mass shooters arent doing anything that warriors havent done to neighboring tribes since the beginning of time, the difference is we had the genius idea of jumbling all these peoples up within the same border, under the same roof, almost like sharing a bed with a complete stranger. the conflict that arises is not just inevitable but benificial for the survival of the species, it IS the competition and it wont be put off for you or oprah winfrey or anyone, these are our instincts. people like klebold and harris, the tranny shooter recently, uncle ted the unabomber, even if they arent consciously aware that they are living basically alone amongst a potentially hostile foreign tribe, they know it on an intuitive level because it is instinct, and would do war from within our own borders against us.

[gothamslostboy]

I’m so disappointed to live in Arizona rn. Actually the US in general. This isnt my usual posts but why the fuck is this country moving backwards?

Not just in trans rights, but in women’s, indigenous, black ppls, lgbtq in general, even in climate. The Willow project is going to kill any remaining chance at stopping global warming. States are trying to pass laws that could charge AFAB ppl for anything that stops their pregnancy, even miscarriages. Ppl are trying to take away ICWA, which protects children from being taken away from their families. Some are trying to bring back Jim Crow laws.

The sad part is I haven’t even mentioned everything going on in the us bc truth is I dont know. The news doesn’t report all of it. Which leads me to another important thing. The only reason I know about most of this is bc of TikTok, which the government is currently trying to ban. If this works, I and many others will lose access to being able to learn about what is happening in our country.

United States is no longer the land of the free, though it never truly was. American citizens are being treated as ‘others’, and I hate to say it but we are on our way to a genocide. There are so many ppl in power right now who can and will do everything they can to kill these and any other groups they don’t agree with.

Please, if you are a US citizen over 18, fight them. Sign petitions, don’t vote for them, speak out, do as much as you can to help. When I saw help, I mean help ALL of us. We need to stick together, because they are hoping to divide and conquer

It seems those in power have forgotten about separation of Church and state. They don’t care about anyone not in their team, hell, they don’t even care about most of those ppl.

[vvh0adie]

and thats honestly why i fucked with namjoon when he said this about kpop perfection:

Q. The cult of youth, the cult of perfection, the cult of K-pop overexertion? Are these Korean cultural traits? A. In the West, people just don’t get it. Korea is a country that has been invaded, razed to the ground, torn in two. Just seventy years ago there was nothing. We were getting aid from the IMF and the UN. But now, the whole world is looking at Korea. How is that possible, how did that happen? Because people are working fucking hard to improve themselves. You’re in France or the UK, countries that have been colonising other countries for centuries, and you come to me and say ”oh God, you put so much pressure on yourselves, life in Korea is so stressful". well, yes. That’s how you get things done. And it’s part of what makes K-pop so appealing. Of course, there are shadows, everything that happens too fast and too intensely has side effects.

if koreans didnt want to do it, they wouldn't. and we cant act like the system isnt going to have some trauma behind it when we consider their plight

i have some critiques about the american rap scene but that doesnt mean i want it to cease altogether

also african americans have a lot of these themes of perfection, youth, and overexertion

like a lot of music is a response to the hardship young black people faced during their respective time period, but also there was music about what its like to be young and free/rebellious.

then perfection (lol) if you cant fucking sing or rap, black people are going to tell you. we dictate whats cool in the states. i implore yall to watch an episode of the Apollo theater. Lauryn Hill's performance when she was a child was rough. the way the black audience booed her was what we call tough love. she was sad at the moment but she turned into a star. was it harsh to boo a child? yes. but that shit worked and now people wont stop talking about her.

and white people can complain about child abuse -which is valid- but i bet you they'd be the same folks who would miss some of their favorite black artist had they not been worked to the bone

you love micheal jackson? you love beyonce?

all im saying is theres a method to the madness

and really all im seeing is a symptom of colonization turning into a affinity for wanting to create

because ill be the first to say how i see some slavery practices carried over into the culture. an an authorative fist can churn out overexerted but efficenitn products

kpop provides a product and so does black music

and its the our own people

maybe we'll get to a future where we're not so hard on each other but for right now we have to be the best at everything we do so our oppressors will give us a crumb of respect and possible reconsider killing us another day

all we've done is adapted to capitalism the best way we know how and at least for black amerians, i know that system was never supposed to work for us. it works a tiny bit, but i'd argue its still shit. especially considering most black artist dont own there shit under mostly white owned labels

while im not a fan of the gyeongseong creature soundtrack, i can completely understand why they might not have had the means to provide music that was fitting for the time period.

i literally typed "korean pop songs from the 40s"

and its only giving me covers of those songs from kpop idols

its not to say that there werent singers and music being made at the time or else these idols wouldnt be able to do renditions of them

but i dont think they're very well archived on the internet

or at least american internet

but then that still doesnt make sense why they wouldnt pull from an korean archive and use songs from there

and that only leads me to believe that they weren't allowed to record most these songs on tracks. it was all passed down orally or on paper and later recorded.

so you have a era of traditional korean songs from probably the joseon era -or even before that- then a huge ass fucking gap because of japanese occupation then "apparently" it starts back up with kpop/trot once korean declared independence.

that dont sit right with me cuz that's whats colonizations does; it makes it seem like your history started right after you liberated yourself

like the internet literally makes it look like korean music started right after their liberation from japan when we all know that's not true

so either im not looking hard enough or the production team really didnt want to use old korean trot, pop, folk or jazz

it really reminds me how african americans have gospel songs where some were made during slavery and others are west african songs translated into english. but the only reason we have them is because slavers would allow people to sing them in the fields or when they were allowed church time.

then after emancipation and really in the 20s and 30s we start to see jazz and pop come into fruition since african americans since we were "free" to do so. but also white people still put us through hardships considering we could only perform them for their entertainment or to give to them so they could monetize and gain stardom from.

white people literally didnt fuck with jazz cuz they found it a bastardization of classical music, but the moment someone white came in and standardized then it was good. or either they would come to black neighborhood and party in secret. which often times even those were broken up by the police for loitering and gang activity.

after having someone dictate what and when you create, you kind of get this addiction to creating because you dont know that right could be stripped from you again or you've had to hold it in for so long that you just get this burst.

400 years + jim crow is a lot of time

the late 1800s to August 15, 1948

thats a long ass time