#why are you hugging my faen

[joongdunking]

Jealous Joong part 2 😆

Pond giving his bestie Dunk a hug the moment he appeared after hiding under the blanket for so long!

[holdmytesseract]

Loki request: Reader with KP (Keratosis Pilaris). She is a little insecure about her KP. She finally decides to tell Loki and show him. Of course, the KP doesn't bother him. In fact, he loves it. He tells her that she shouldn't worry about something that bothers silly Midgardians. He will kiss every bump on her body. He sometimes needs to feel her bumpy arms after a bad day.

Just The Way You Are

Loki Laufeyson x fem!Reader

Summary: You shut yourself off from Loki; not showing him an inch of your skin. Being the doubtful God he is, he immediately is afraid that he was doing something wrong. What happens when he accidentally uncovers your secret?

Warnings: angst, insecurities/insecure reader, fluff, talks of sex? nudity? even more fluff, Loki being the best boyfriend

Word Count: 2k

a/n: I hope you like this, friend! :) This is the last story of this year! It's been one hell of a ride - that much is clear! Huge thanks to everyone who became part of the crew and read my stories. And of course to all my wonderful friends and mutuals! I love you all! *biiiig hugs*

Tags: @lady-rose-moon @huntress-artemis @muddyorbsblr @ijuststareatstuffhereok89 @chennqingg @smolvenger @alexakeyloveloki @theaudacitytowrite @jennyggggrrr @stupidthoughtsinwriting @asgards-princess-of-mischief @eleniblue @vanilla-daydreaming @loz-3 @valencia-rou @mishkatelwarriorgoddess @fictive-sl0th @bunny24sstuff @iamlokisgloriouspurpose @lovingchoices14 @linaax @mochie85 @goblingirlsarah @glitchquake @lokidbadguy @icytrickster17 @gruftiela @lulubelle814 @mandywholock1980 @november-rayne @chantsdemarins @simping-for-marvel @lou12346789 @aagn360 @lokiforever @anukulee @multifandom-worlds

Masterlist °☆• Loki Masterlist

The library was empty at that time of the day. It was quiet.

Almost too quiet.

The only sound was the ticking sound of the clock, hanging at the wall. A sound Loki didn't even discerned. He was way too lost in his thoughts - something Thor noticed, too, when he entered the library. All the god of Thunder wanted was to put back a few books Jane had read and now he found his brother staring absent-mindedly at the white wall across from him. Loki wasn't even blinking.

Thor frowned; cocked his head. "Have you magicked the lines of that book on the wall or why are you so focused on white nothingness, brother?" The blonde man's booming voice ripped Loki rather harshly out of his thoughts. He almost jumped out of his skin.

"Oh fy faen, brother!" Loki cursed; jaw clenching. Thor giggled apologetically. "Apologies, brother. I didn't mean to scare you..." He paused for a moment; watched how Loki crossed his arms over his chest; grumbling. "Why were you staring at the wall? Are you quite alright?" The younger god's fingers twitched around the book; body visibly tensing. "Sure." He just said; shaking his head.

Thor was probably not always the smartest, but by now - after all those years, he could tell when something was bothering Loki. Not always, but today was it quite obvious. The blonde shook his head. "You are not. I can tell. Don't fool me, brother. What's bothering you?" Loki snorted. "Nothing of your interest, brother. My problem, not yours." Thor frowned and then shook his head, before he plopped down next to Loki on the way too small sofa for the bulky man's physique, almost crushing his younger sibling.

"Brother, what-" Loki complained, but got cut off by Thor slapping his big palm against his chest; causing all the air to leave his lungs. "Talk to me. I know something is wrong. I want to help you, Loki." The raven haired man coughed; needing to take a big breath. "And..." Another deep breath. "And what exactly makes you think that you can help me?" Thor just shrugged his shoulders; giving him a smile. "Intention. Besides, we are brothers."

Loki crossed his arms over his chest once more. "And what if I simply don't wish to talk to you?" "You don't have to, but I'm sure it would help. Of course you can just keep on bottling all up until it- How does that Midgardian saying go?" Thor frowned; thinking hard. "Ah! Until it eats you up inside!" He shrugged his shoulders again, "Do whatever pleases you." and wanted to stand up, when Loki held him back. "Alright, alright, fine," he grumbled; giving in.

Thor smiled and sat back down beside him. "Spill it. I'm all ears, brother."

Loki sighed; felt the embarrassment creeping a bit up on him. "It's about Y/N... She... She won't let me... see her." Thor frowned; was visibly not catching up, "What do you mean by that?" and causing Loki to roll his eyes. "Oh for faen," he mumbled underneath his breath. "Sex, brother! It's about sex!"

Thor blinked for a few moment, until a shit-eating grin formed on his face. "Does my little brother has problems with satisfying his lady?" He gave him a nudge with his shoulder; wiggling his eyebrows. "Don't fret, brother. I'm the perfect man to give you advice in how to-" Loki pinched the bridge of his nose; already regretting that he agreed to talk to Thor. "It's not that!" He cut his brother off and sighed.

"No?" Thor asked; smile dropping. "What, uh, is it then?" Another sigh left the raven haired god's lips. "Where do I start..." Loki said; more to himself than Thor. "We are together now for almost six months and... I... I'm afraid that I'm doing something wrong..." The blonde's gaze softened; realising that this was a serious, important matter. "Why is that?" Loki started to pick nervously at his nails. "Well, because she... She seems to 'hide' herself from me. She avoids me, seeing her barely dressed or naked. She locks the door when she's showering or changing... I-I mean, I understand that. I really do. If she feels uncomfortable with that yet, then I won't push her, but whenever I try to speak with her about this, she escapes the conversation..." Loki swallows. "And now I'm afraid that I am the reason... You know me, brother... The voices in my head are getting louder and louder. Am I doing something wrong? Did I push her too much and didn't notice it? Is she not trusting me enough? If yes, why?" Loki hung his head; raven curls falling into his face. "I give her all the time she needs. I'd wait forever for her, but... It's bothering me. I-I want to understand it and help her - but I can't, because she won't talk to me... What do I do, brother?"

"Hmm..." Thor hums; scratching his beardy chin. "What if you talk to her properly?" Loki blinked. "Properly?" Thor nodded. "Just... confront her directly. Tell Lady Y/N that this is bothering you and that you wish to understand." "But what if she tries to avoid me again?"

The god of thunder smiled and clapped his hand on Loki's shoulder. "You've got a silver-tongue, brother... Talking is your strength. You just have to wait for the right moment." Loki looked a bit uncertain at the blonde man. "If you say so..." "I know so." The raven haired man gave his brother a small smile. "Thank you."

And Loki waited for the right moment. It took quite a few days for the right moment to arrive, but in the end, it did...

Loki came to you earlier that evening. Steve's eight o'clock meeting didn't take as long as usual and therefore, Loki was too early. Something you didn't know and not anticipated to happen. You were sure that you had enough time to take a shower and get dressed until your boyfriend came back - but you didn't... "Darling?" The god called out for you. It was dark in your apartment. Since you were a couple, Loki spent more time in your home than his. He frowned; looking down the dark hallway - and noticed that the light in your bathroom was on. Only seconds later, he heard the running water of the shower. Loki swallowed hard; knew exactly that you were unaware of his presence. He considered for a millisecond to try and see if the door was open - but no. No, he wouldn't do that. He respected your privacy and whatever you were insecure about.

Taking off his shoes and suit jacket, he decided to wait in the bedroom for you. A green shimmer enveloped his body as he walked inside the cosy room; changing him from his 'business clothes' into casual clothes. Sweatpants and t-shirt. He grabbed the book resting on your nightstand and flopped on the bed; reading.

Meanwhile you still hadn't a single clue that Loki was already back and currently chilling on your bed. Therefore, you finished showering carelessly and made your way to the bedroom after blow drying your hair - only wearing underwear, in order to get dressed.

Humming the song which ghosted through your brain already the whole day, you opened the door and walked in. You were so rapt in the song, you didn't even notice that your bedside lamp was on - or your boyfriend laying on the bed. Loki blinked; was quite shocked about your 'careless behaviour'. His eyes widened as they travelled over your almost nude body; seeing the holy temple he always wanted to worship but never could suddenly in front of him.

"D-Darling?" He more or less stuttered out with a husky voice.

Hearing the sound of his voice; you flinched badly and literally were completely taken by surprise. Like a deer, caught in the headlights you stared at Loki; eyes at the size of plates. But once your mind had caught up, all warnings bells inside your brain were ringing. Get out of here! Get out of here! Your mind was screaming at you. Escape the situation! Flee!

Acting on your instinct, you did just that. You ran. Out of the bedroom, inside the bathroom; door flying shut behind you. Loki immediately realised what was going on and jumped to his feet; storming after you - but he was too slow. Just when he reached the door, the lock clicked shut.

"Darling?!" Loki was afraid; worried that he scared you off even more now. I should've told her I am here, he cursed himself internally. "Y/N? L-Love, please... I'm sorry." A few seconds later, he heard a small sob from the other side; followed by a uncertain, wobbly voice. "A-Are... Are you going to leave me now?"

Loki frowned; was more than just confused - if that was even possible...

"Why... Why in all the nine realms should I leave you, love?" You sobbed - and it almost broke the god's heart. "B-Because you saw me half naked... You probably even saw it..."

Loki blinked. That was it. He couldn't take this anymore. "Okay, darling, please open the door. We need to talk. This is long overdue."

You already feared the worst, as you anxiously unlocked the door and opened it slowly, hesitatingly; letting Loki in. He stepped inside - and was face to face with your almost naked self for the second time in his life. While you fought the urge to cover yourself, Loki literally bathed in the vision of your beautiful body.

"You are stunning, my love. Absolutely beautiful. A goddess."

You blinked. "I-I... What? Loki, are you... Are you kidding me?" Those words almost hurt him. "Why should I, love?" Your jaw dropped. You couldn't believe this. "Don't... Don't you see it?" You gestured at your legs, shoulders and belly. "Are you blind?" A single tear was running down your cheeks - and Loki fought the urge to wipe it away. "You mean the red, bumpy dots-" "On my skin, yes." You interrupted him. Loki swallowed; was very uncertain about how to react in that situation right now. You seemed hurt, but also sad, insecure and angry.

"What are they? Is it a-a illness?" You nodded; defeated. "Keratosis Pilaris. A skin condition, which leaves not very pretty small, rough, reddish or white bumps and patches on the skin." Loki stayed silent for a moment; processing your words. "Is it... harmless?" "Yes." A relieved breath left his lips. "Oh thank the Norns. You really had me worried there for a second, darling." You blinked; were on the brink of being speechless. "You... You are not... d-disgusted?" Horror overtook your boyfriend's face. "Disgusted?!" He shook his head. "No, no, my darling Y/N. Absolutely not. You are the most beautiful woman those eyes have ever seen. I don't care about the bumps and patches. It's a part of you - and I love every part of you."

"Y-You do?"

"Yes. With all my heart."

The butterflies within you belly were running wild at his sweet, heart melting words. It became a lot to handle suddenly; your emotions, insecurities and fears overwhelming you. Words failed you. All you could do was cry. Loki was instantly by your side; literally catching you, wrapping you up in a snug, warm hug. His lips pressed against your forehead. "Shh, my beautiful angel. I love you."

You snuggled even closer against him and just cried; getting all out of your system.

When you had calmed down a bit, Loki carried you back into the bedroom and laid down on the bed with you; pulling you against his body. "Was that the reason why you always avoided to get undressed in front of me?" You nodded; another tear rolling down your cheek. "Y-Yes. I-I'm pretty insecure about my KP a-and well... All the guys I dated before you were, uh, they... They didn't like it." Loki was shocked. Appalled at what you just told him. "All those Midgardian men never fail to disgust me... How dare they." He spat; shaking his head. "They clearly don't know how to treat a woman properly." The god smiled lovingly at you and started to pepper your skin with kisses; paying extra attention to the little bumps on your body.

"Never ever hide yourself from me, my love. I love you just the way you are, okay?" You nodded; giving him a small smile. "Okay."

[earthmixsclowderofcats]

Not trying to discredit anybody, I'm just genuinely wondering about ZeeNunew and MaxNat. You seem to put them in the same category of relationships. But the way the couples behave around each other is very different.

ZeeNunew: talking about kissing and hugging in private, going on dates and dating at work, presenting each other as their special person to the world, involving both of their families, nicknames or the way they're referring to each (baobei, ter, tua-eng, faen), talking about sleeping together and showering together, friends and coworkers always spilling tea about them, etc.

MaxNat: Nat calls Max phi. They never talk about going on dates or doing other romantic activities, Max was asked about his boyfriend Nat at a fanmeet and he replied that Nat is like his little brother.

Again, I'm absolutely not a MaxNat anti, i don't know too much about them and I'd like to know more. Do you really believe they're comparable to ZeeNunew? If yes, why?

I don't ever presume to fully understand what these men's relationships are like in private due to the performative nature of the industry they are in. They are actors but they are also selling themselves as a brand.

I also don't think I would compare relationships like that, because the interpersonal dynamics between different people are going to be infinitely nuanced. And I think BL relationships specifically are even more so.

That being said,I'm just here to have a good time and that's just the vibe I get. I know that their relationship is going to be whatever it is or isn't regardless of my opinion of them. I just think they're cute.

I've heard the "phi" argument before and like, idk how to explain that the fluidity of interpersonal relationship labels like that is just a staple of being queer (or queer adjacent) in a more traditionally conservative setting. Like, I don't think these sorts of relationships are always as black and white as people seem to believe they are. Just from personal experience and historical text.

If I were getting nitpicky I would bring out receipts for when they use more traditional "couple" language but that would be a project lol. They have a tendency to switch back and forth I've noticed.

Edit: why not

I don't do what they do with my brother tbh. I don't think quality time is something needs to be publicly labeled as a date. Relationships can be private and still valid.

In general they just give me a different vibe because zeenunew are very loud and showy with their affections while maxnat have always been more low-key.

On a serious note, we will only ever know what they choose to share with us.

On a less serious note, being delulu is one of the few free pleasures in this life.

In summation; it's the vibe

[baconcolacan]

Haha you're probably so sick of these au swaps but im really invested!

I imagine if S!Tom and R!tom changed places spiritually instead, just imagine R!Tom waking up (in S!Toms body) freaking out because 1 he cant see shit and 2 someone is hugging him from behind?? Stay Tomm from the other hand..Oh..god. I doubt he'd be able to defend himself with R!Toms injuries

HAHAHA NOT AT ALL! Its good brain exercise for my creative flow, I dont mind the au swaps at all.

Oh definitely, R!Tom would NOT handle suddenly being blind too well. He'd probably think Tord had done something to him while he was asleep, plus he HATES physical contact so he would definitely freak out and start kicking/hitting at whoever is hugging him. This of course causes S!Tord to yell and curse "AY FY FAEN!!" which would only DOUBLE R!Tom's panic at hearing an (almost) familiar voice speak Norwegian. He'll tumble out of the bed in his panic and back away as much as he can until his back hits the wall, but he won't move since he cant see, though his fight instincts will be dialed up HIGH and will be ready to retaliate if anybody even comes CLOSE. Then...he starts seeing heat signatures. Which freaks him out EVEN MORE. "Owwww fuck! Thomas what the hell was that for?!"

The figure on the bed says, and Tom has no doubts that it's Tord. He growls and somehow his throat makes an animalistic sound, which, huh cool, but also not his main focus right now. "You stay the fuck back Larsin or so help me god I will KILL you."

That seems to make Tord pause on the bed. "...Kjaere that isn't funny."

Tom bears his teeth and somehow they feel sharper, he hears Tord pull in a quiet breath. "Come any closer and we'll see who's laughing you bastard."

They stay in silence for a while, and Tord's....fidgeting? On the bed. "What...is going on? Love are you...okay? What-" "Do NOT fucking call me that." Somehow his words sounded jumbled, a clicking noise in his throat followed after his growl. "Kjae- T-Tom..." That makes Tom pause at least. Tord never really called him Tom- at least not when he isn't trying to annoy him- plus...the way he said it seems...different somehow?? "Please...be calm, your hound, you're starting to trigger a shift...doesn't it hurt??" His what?? What in the world is happening?? "What are you-" Suddenly a door bursts open and Tom is back to raising his hackles. An actual goddamned hiss tears out from his throat as a new presence runs into the room. But...the scent (?) is familiar, and....he doesn't feel threatened by it. "...Daddy??"

Pup. Puppy. His (?) pup. His child- what??? he doesn't have a child!! - his pup. He makes a few clicking sounds before he could stop himself. The new presence stops. Then chirps. Suddenly he's all fours and running towards his pup the kid (?), he feels something lashing behind him as he curls himself around the kid before leaning up to growl low at Tord still on the bed. "...Uh...pappa??" The kid burrows himself closer to Tom, who calms down a bit at the action and lowers himself just a little. "What...is happening??" "I...don't know, puffin...." It takes a while, but eventually, AK manages to corral his dad (?) away from his papa. Meanwhile Tord makes a call to get Bing down to the cabin to find out just what the hell is going on. Why is Tom acting so strange?? ...And how come a partial shift didn't seem to hurt him?? ---- So....his eyes are back. Thats...wow, weird?? But....it seems like he's lost every other sense he had as a hellhound. Everything feels dull and limited. He cant feel any heat signatures, scents dont differentiate each other anymore. He can't feel the thrum of his hound in his veins. His body....ough fuck, holy hell. What the fuck ate him up and spat him out??? He sees all the bandages on him, and wondered how the fuck he wasn't dead yet. A door opened. Tom looks up and almost reels back in shock. T...Tord?? No, wait, how could...he's young, 30 at most, there are subtle differences to him, but he looks exactly like his husband used to when they were in their 30s. ...And why is he dressed like a douchebag?? What the hell?? "T...Elskede?"

'Tord' seemed to come at an abrupt stop as the door closed behind him. His one eye went wide, though it wouldn't be obvious to outsiders, Tom was extremely familiar with Tord's emotions when he tried to keep them subtle. Then a smile crawled up his face. And it looked too cold. "Hm, interesting..." Tom found himself wincing at the tone of voice 'Tord' used. It sounded too hollow, too distant, too...eerie, he supposed. His husband never spoke to him like that, as if he were some interesting toy. "I was wondering if you ever picked up on my language...." 'Tord' approached him, and suddenly all of Tom's senses were screaming at him to get out- His hands stopped before he could lift them. He was strapped down. What the hell?! "Have you been keeping secrets from me, Thomas?" 'Tord' was at his side now, and Tom flinched when his flesh hand came to caress the side of his face. "Did you study my mother tongue for me?" 'Tord' chuckled low, a cruel little laugh, as he gripped at Tom's chin to forcibly make him look at him. "I feel so touched!"

Tom felt his blood go cold. This man....isn't his husband....

"Won't you say it again, Thomas?" Red frowned at him, trying to look pleading, but his grip deepened more and more as Tom kept his silence, enough that his fingers were starting to dig into his skin. FUCK! THAT HURTS! Tom growled and pulled his head away, only for Tord to grip at his cheeks and yank him back towards him as he cried out. "Oh, no no no no no!" Red tutted at him as he held his face in a bruising grip. "You don't get to play with my feelings like that Thomas! How could you say something so sweet then suddenly act so cold??" Red tilted his head. "That's not very nice you know."

Tom scowled up at him. "Go fuck yourself, Larsin." He hissed.

Red chuckled. "Oh well." He said before letting Tom go only to grab him by the neck and slam him backwards on the bed, causing Tom to yelp and choke as the hold on him tightened.

He tried to break out of the hold, humans weren't as strong as hounds. But....he can't. What in the world is happening?! "I don't mind doing things the hard way."

---

hahaha I did have fun! As much as I could on a business trip anyway lmao. And the rest was good and well and long <3 I saw lots of birds.

[invisiblegarters]

Be My Favorite Ep 11

Last Week: Pear was too decent for anyone in this show, Kwan finally figured out Not is the worst, Kawi and Pisaeng did the do.

This week: my frustration with tumblr is reaching a boiling point, I don't know why I'm even bothering with this when literally no one will even see it. But I truck on because at this point it's habit.

Joy.

Oh interesting, parent meeting about the kiddos. I wonder sometimes if the reason that PIsaeng and Pear were getting married in an alt timeline (at least one of them) is because of these two, but at least in the current one they both seem fairly willing to let their kids be.

And once again, Pear is way nicer than I would be. Mom was selfish. The end. I do get feeling trapped by a life you don't want, but did she not make the decision to be married and have a child? And then she made that child suffer so that she could go off and achieve her dreams, and then had the gall to thank her, to not apologize or appear to feel any remorse for just exiting her life.

But.

But it's probably better for Pear in the long run if she can let go of the bitterness. So for her sake, I'm glad.

Kwan just delete those pics and move on, babe. Not's not worth all this.

So I guess they were going for nerves last week. Clumsily done. So tired of the blushing maiden thing in general, honestly. Can we please retire it forever along with the crazy ex faen trope? Can we please, please, please stop sending the message that one person in the relationship has to be shy and reserved and scared of sex while the other pushes them forward? It's so fucking detrimental, and it just feeds into this idea that to be a "good" girl (or the bottom in BL, because it's always the bottom isn't it? sigh) you can't actually desire sex, can't want it, or you can want it but you also have to pretend not to because good girls don't (but I do). And I'm so so tired of it. SO tired. People have enough hang ups about sex all on their own without media reinforcing this bullshit.

Last week I said that I would hesitantly trust this show with an asexual storyline. I want to take that back now. My trust is revoked, you couldn't handle it properly, show. There's literally nothing wrong with being hesitant about sleeping with someone for the first time (or not wanting to sleep with anyone at all), but there's a way to do it and this show...did not.

Well that theory that the old man is future!Kawi is certainly looking more correct. How else would he know to show up and scold him.

I know how you can get rich, Kawi. Be Pisaeng's sugar baby.

Okay sir, hush your face about in-depth analysis. I am feeling very called out right now.

Yesss thank you dude. It's like with dad. Kawi couldn't prevent his death because he was always going to go. Dad's death is a fixed point. But what Kawi could do - what he finally did do - was fix his relationship with him. He opened up, he told his dad he loves him, he did the work.

Alrighty so we're flashbacking through the rest of college now? This is weird, especially after going through everything else so slowly (if they fast fowarded through a Not redemption I will throw the most massive fit (and for once be glad for this stupid shadowban, since then no one will see the massive tantrum)). If you've done all you meant to why are you not going back to the future (heh) Kawi?

Why is he still asking this question?

And now we're montaging through living together. This ep is turning into the Oprah of montages - and you get a montage! And you get a montage. This makes me more certain than ever that Pisaeng has been doing his own time traveling. The domesticity is cute though.

Pear and Kwan arrived to Christmas together! Still shipping it even though I know it won't come true. Sigh. At least Not isn't at the table. For a hot second I thought he was, that Pear was hugging him, and I almost lost it. But nope, it was Kawi lol. I was about to throw down with this show.

Do NOT test me show I am not in the mood.

Fifteenth time's the charm, eh, Pearmei? Granted it's not like you know that since you don't remember all the timelines, but still.

Me the second I see Pisaeng pulling out those pills: are they gonna kill him off? Would they do that?

Why is this where my brain goes? I mean, it was instant. Just, BOOM are they killing Pisaeng.

Ah, the good old wipe them down when they're sick trope. Good times.

"Do you think I'll die?" Pffft, me and Pisaeng are on the same wavelength. But also maybe don't tease Kawi like that the dude has several issues around his loved ones dying okay. Don't make him pull out that music box, Pisaeng.

HAHAHA is that the first grey hair oh noooo! Fun fact: my sis found her first one when she was like 22. She was not best pleased.

Oh no all this joking about Pisaeng dying but is it going to be Kawi instead? And why do I keep expecting death? People get ill, self.

Ugh, yes, the harsh realities of having no rights regarding the partner you've lived with for years - rights that would be given by default to a straight couple. God I hate it, but I'm happy to see this drum being banged. Because it should be.

Poor Pisaeng. So maybe he didn't travel in time before, but he sure as hell is going to now, because I think Kawi is actually going to die. Or Pisaeng is going to be so terrified of it happening that he can't help himself. But to change it or to make sure it never happens by cutting himself off from Kawi before it can? And then staying in the closet, going abroad, marrying Pear?

Because I truly think that he'd lock them all into a shitty future just to save Kawi's life.

Well at least he tells Kawi what happened.

Have to say, the end part saved this ep for me. I don't know if it's just that I'm already kind of pissed off (thanks tumblr!) or if this ep just started off rough, but I was not feeling it at the beginning. I really want to like this show all the way through. Please don't screw it up in the final hour. Please.

[absolutebl]

This Week In BL - Japan is BRINGING IT

June 2022 Wk 2

Being a highly subjective assessment of one tiny corner of the interwebs. Organized by which ones (in each category) I’m enjoying the most.

Ongoing Series - Thai

Triage (AISplay Mon) Ep 7- This ep was mostly to give movement to the romance plot and since (oddly for me) that’s the bit I find the least engaging I wasn’t as wild about this installment. Next week looks VERY dramatic tho. 

Check Out (IQIYI Sat) Ep 1 - This season’s messy gays be messy series! I gotta say I love the intro credits on this one: character + actor names. I need that in all my BL. Our leads are Nine (Chahub) and Daonuea (Best). (My boy Plustor is coming too!) So Daonuea is pining for the boy who ghosted him after a hot fling AND a boss/ex/cheater that wants to date him again. Of course boss & fling turn out to know each other. Best is GOOD. I like an office setting but I’m not wild about the execution here. But the messy exes drama is relatable and fun/different. Captions are quite poor. 

KinnPorsche (iQIYI Sat) Ep 10 - Well KimChay moved fast. Meanwhile Kinn’s bodyguards are all pretty naff, letting Tawan get away. The traitor(s) = no particular surprise. Oo death! Also dumb crazy drama gay, but whatevs. I’m mad that everyone looked for Porsche but no one looks for Pete? I guess it’s good to be the boss’s f-toy. Oh, I’m salty abotu this show. Sigh. At least it was an exciting ep? 

Sky in Your Heart (Fri YouTube) Ep 2 - It’s perfectly serviceable. I’m not wowed by the chemistry but it’s fine. 

My Secret Love (YouTube Sat) Ep 3 - Fake relationship is a go and watching them lampoon BL tropes is kind of fun. No screen caps because, you know, fakel but they covered (deep breath): head in lap, picnic, feeding, back hug, movie date, sharing earbuds, and library assignation. Just because I am having a really hard time keeping this straight (pun intended) here is the character breakdown (aside from the leads): campus star = P’Tim (he comes with portable adorable bestie); pair in the 7 year relationship = P’Park & Lee (who switched departments) - they use rao/ter with each other (cutesy). Everyone else = unimportant. 

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

To My Star (Korea Viki) Ep 1-2 - YES FINE I’m watching it. I said I was gonna wait but... I CAN’T. OMG I’m so scared. The doorway being used for transition shots between past| |present was very clever. Also my goodness I almost forgot what really good acting looked like in BL! The year separation after a break up is a classic Korean drama plot point that usually comes at the end of a show, not the beginning. It’s going to be interesting and bumpy to watch them deal with this reverse plotting. They better come up with a really good justification for Ji Woo leaving and being that cruel or heads will ROLL. Also, that better be his sister and not an ex girlfriend, I have it up the here with faen fatales. Please don’t betray our trust Hwang Da Seul. 

Love in Spring (Korea grey) Ep 5-8 - I love to see a brushing hair trope (in a way I don’t love the usual hair dry trope we get in BL). I have no idea why. Also we had an example of the boy protecting “the girl’s” reputation with fisticuffs. This story reminds me a little of those girl disguised as a boy host club shows we got from Japan for a while – same kind of comedy that is a little beyond my ken and slightly jarring. At ep 7 it finally got good as the leads develop a genuine friendship. The snake thing was odd though. To be fair there’s a lot of odd in the show. I’m enjoying the tension and liking it more each ep. 

Plus & Minus (Taiwan Viki *rec* & GaGa Fri) Ep 10 - The dreaded unnecessary break up. At least we understand the bar owner’s motivations. I don’t know where I am with this show now, but I do like that its general assumption is that everyone is at least a little bit bi, and since I too like to give everyone the benefit of the doubt, I’m not opposed to seeing it on screen. 

Want to See You (Vietnam YouTube) Ep 1 - Boy likes his baths, that’s for certain. Standard psycho female character and a basic but uncommon servant/master set up. I’m getting Jane Eyre or something. Nice kisses already but this is no Mr. Cinderella. (The bar has been set, VBL, now I know what you can do.) 

Getaway (Singapore Mon YouTube) Ep 2-3 - Look, I’m the first to admit that there’s a lot of bad and awkward acting in this genre, but for some reason… it feels a lot worse in English. I like how unabashedly gay this show is but (how do I put this nicely?) if I’m gonna watch English language gay-vacay shizz – I’d rather watch Fire Island. Still, as one might expect, the heat execution is good (Taiwan still holds the crown, tho). 

BLs That Finished this week!

Dear Doctor, I'm Coming for Soul (iQIYI Weds) Ep 12fin - I was mixed over the sides, but in the end, they were a cute couple (weird kisses thing notwithstanding). This show had a very Korean style unnecessary-separation in the last ep. But I guess I’m used to that now. Are KarnNat the best Thai origin couple at domesticity? Seems like. The show’s ending reminded me A LOT of Love: Life on the Line (Director’s Cut) so if you like that you’ll like this one, but it’s not strictly HEA. I thought it suited the narrative so I’m not mad. But I’m not sure I’ll ever rewatch it either. Like Peach of Time, everything was set up for us, so the end wasn’t surprising and it managed to be substantially happier than Peach or Grey Rainbow (shudder). So maybe I rate it higher because it could have been a lot worse? ARGH. Decisions. 7/10 RECOMMENDED WITH RESERVATIONS Full review here. 

Close Friend 2 (Viki Thur) Ep 6fin - I liked the dealing with celebrityhood and fandom storyline, although I thought it was too generous to those fans. But in the end this is, like the first installment, fine but forgettable. I did like the breaking the fourth wall and mentioning each other‘s projects at the end. That was fun insider trading. (I guess we get a season 3 featuring DunBas, not my favorite. Shrug.) Anygay, both pairs did well but in terms of content and story, I wasn’t wowed. 6/10 WORTH WATCHING BUT FLAWED 

Fukou-kun wa Kiss Suru Shikanai! AKA Mr Unlucky Has No Choice But to Kiss! (Japan GaGa *rec*  & Viki Fri) Ep 8fin - since this is in the My Love Mix-Up vein of JBL, I was not expecting a final kiss. I consider us lucky that we got the launch kiss, quite frankly. That didn’t stop me from being a touch disappointed, but the final boyfriends cuteness wrestling in bed (VERY Cherry Magic of them) was perfectly serviceable. A solid little JBL. 8/10 RECOMMENDED 

Gossip

I still can’t believe they’re allowing it but it really does seem like Korea is bringing us A Shoulder To Cry On starring Jaehan (oldest) & Yechan (maknae) BOTH from Kpop group OMEGA X. Enemies to lovers, school set, 12 eps, due out in the fall. 

Also in Korea announced adaptation of Lily's comic Heesu in Class 2 . About a shy unpopular boy with a secret crush on best friend. Looks pretty pat but I’m always open to KBL school-set stuff. 

Japan announced BL adaptation of Minamoto Kazuki's comic: Kabesaa Doujin Sakka no Neko Yashiki-kun wa Shounin Yokkyuu wo Kojirasete iru starring Matsuoka Koudai (I know him from Five) and Nakao Masaki (Kakafukaka, Bow Then Kiss - he’s a BIG DEAL ya’ll) slated to be released in October. (source) The description from Crunchyroll is up on MDL but it’s incomprehensible. 

Cambodia released a trailer of upcoming Khmer BL មើលបានហាមសម្លឹង AKA Eye Contact. We are in “don’t bet on it happening (or finishing)” territory. 

New Thai drama My Coach seems to have a BL side plot. 

Art Adore En got a trailer. Country boy studying at a university in Bangkok catches the eye of his senior. 

2 Moons 3: The Ambassador announced a cast. That came out of nowhere. 

PRIDE! 

This is one of those times that I really wish I read Thai and could confirm it, but Thai BL actor Copter Panuwat seems to have come out as non-binary. Copter has always been super supportive since the 2 Moons days. Someone at MDL is ON IT and has updated Copter’s profile to they/them in the bio section, even if the MDL system doesn’t offer it as an option (someone oughta change the back end code on that). 

No matter what, happy pride! 

In Case You Missed It

Korean BL Blueming is getting a movie version. Since this aired on iQIYI not Viki, not sure if inter fans will get to see it. 

iQIYI has picked up SantaEarth’s friends-to-lovers (possibly sad) BL My Only 12% from Wabi Sabi, coming late summer. 

Japan is airing a BL comedy-drama adaptation of Naruko's Fudanshi Bartender no Tashinami AKA Accomplishment of Fudanshi Bartender streaming on FOD. About a fancy pants bartender who is secretly a nerdy BL fan. 

3 BLs have been submitted for consideration to the Seoul International Drama Awards 2022: Semantic Error (Korea), I Promised You The Moon (Thailand), and My Beautiful Man (Japan). 

The boys from Kissable Lips are pair branding. (They are rumored to have a new series The Circumstances Of Pungdeok Villa Room 304.) I mention this because it’s my first time seeing a Korean pair consciously use Thai techniques on their social media. 

Next Week Looks Like This: 

We’re hitting the Thai summer slow down season, thank heavens. There was too much for even me to keep up with for a while there. I could used some down time, except Japan won’t let me!

Monday: Japanese BL Old Fashion Cupcake adapted from the manga of the same name by by Sagan Sagan (trailer on FB). Seems to be a hyung romance: office set, employee/boss, age gap. About a subordinate with a crush on his boss - seems a bit Cherry Magic light? Only 5 episodes, coming to Viki! 

Thursday: Kimi no Koto Dake Mite Itai AKA I Only Want To See You only 4 eps, starts June 16, Hulu JP. Not sure on inter.  

Friday: Senpai, Danjite Koidewa! AKA Senpai, This Can’t be Love! is taking over Mr Unlucky’s time slot on Fridays, reported as picked up by GaGa for international although I’m showing it listed for Viki. 

Oh yeah and then also: Love Mechanics disaster muffins start Saturday on WeTV. 

This week’s best moments?

I didn’t pull any. Sheesh, I guess I was disappointed this week. 

(last week)

[wanderingrain]

Blogging through Till the World Ends Ep 8

Do ya'll not know what a gas station looks like?

Wait what are we doing? Why are we here?

I bet ya'll left the gun in the car didn't you.

wow I'm sure that curtain won't be falling down while we're here/s

lol not P'Gus appearing out of nowhere for a jumpscare

They are not about to kill a chicken

Lol Art saying "kill them all" and Golf rethinking his life choices. 🤣

Lol them spitting out the ramen

Not P'Gus creating an opportunity for them to have sex

I hate when they translate faen as girlfriend or boyfriend. It's a gender neutral term. Translating it in a gendered way adds a layer to the conversation that isn't actually there. I'm fine with it when everyone in the room knows the gender of the faen, but when the person doesn't know, the translation makes them seem either ignorant or accepting.

Same Art, same. I feel like I'd understand this better if i didn't have to rely on subtitles.

Weird of them to describe Salim as being a bad thing and then tell Art he is Salim. Are we not gonna fix that or...?

Not P'Gus being surprised they haven't had sex yet. Sir have you ever even seen them kiss? No you haven't because I haven't either.

Not him telling them to have sex

Back to our gang boys

Who leaves their car keys in the car?

Look at that big, beautiful moon.

Not Art being nervous.

Oh?

My dude please tell me you know about lube

Not the shirt being ripped .

Oh no that's such a cute smile

Uhhhh either P'Gus is snooping on his brother when he thinks he's having sex or we have another person in the house.

Again??

ok we've discovered kissing and we don't want to stop I guess

ohhhhh Tilak

if P'Gus died while they were having sex I swear

No Art is so cute lying on the bed all giddy

Wait there's a bedroom in the bedroom? ?

Wait if the guy was in this room all night.... you know what nevermind.

oh no oh no not fighting oh no

there's a swimming pool in the bunker?

This class system sounds really strange.

Don't they already know how to get there?

Not P'Gus knowing about Uncle

oh jeez. This angle looking up at the moon is actually pretty scary. Can you imagine looking up and seeing the moon like that and there's nothing that can be done to stop it? It's going to hit the Earth and then what? Even if people survive, there's so many things that would change if the moon was gone. What happens to the oceans? The day/night cycle? This is the first time this show has made me feel actual fear. It looks like the moon is bearing down on you, about to crush you.

Aww hugging uncle

Oh I bet you the gun is gone

Oh I'm cackling! Not the obviously photoshopped knife! What would be the point of don't that? I guess if you were going to ambush them but how would the people who left the knife know if they were coming back? Oh this show. (Affectionate)

So pretty much right after I wrote that wrote section about the moon, my power shut off. It's 3am. I think the power is out in my whole town. Everything is so dark. I might be a little more scared than I normally would be now that I'm thinking about the moon crashing into the earth. So thanks Till the World Ends for giving me an irrational fear.

Literally just had the fear of death put in me by a show and then the world goes dark.

Episode 9 will have to wait I guess.

[voltronshorts]

I will send more requests and prompts bc I need more content!!! (Obviously there's no pressure but it might help add some extra stuff to queue up/do in the meantime!) Soooo for the drabble number prompts ya girl has got so manyyy rip 3, 57, 72, 85, 94, aaaand 97 Obviously take ur time with these/don't feel like ya gotta do them all cause there's 6 there lmaooo sorrynotsorry

(I wasn’t sure if you wanted this to be in reader-insert or not, so I did a mix of both. Thank you for the request! ❤️)

Prompt #3. “You can’t just sit there all day.”

“Pidge, you can’t just sit there all day,” Matt tells her, leaning against her bedroom doorway with arms crossed. “You’ve been at that thing for, like, 16 hours straight now. And I thought I was a workaholic.”

“Yeah, I’ll take a break in a sec,” she replied without looking at him. “I just need to find a way to circumvent the firewall, and then I should be able to have access to the data inside. But this thing is amazing, it’s like a computer-living hybrid… Every time I try to break down the barriers they build right back up. Maybe if I implant something that behaves like a virus or cancer I can arrest growth and prevent further heal–”

“Katie Colleen Holt,” Matt scolds, walking over to Pidge and grabbing her arm. “You are taking a break right now.”

“But–”

“No butts or asses, young lady.” Matt narrows his eyes. Pidge narrows her eyes in return.

“Geez, when did you turn into dad?”

He lets that go unchallenged. “And I’ll bet all the change in my pocket that when you stand up, it’s gonna sound like a drunk toddler walking over a sea of Legos.”

At the nudge of Matt’s hand, she stands up and straightens her back. It sounds like popcorn popping in a microwave.

She rubs at her back. “Alright, fine. I’ll get a snack or something, but I’m coming right back here.”

“Thought you might say that,” Matt said before reaching into his cloak. “Which is why I got you this!”

“No WAY,” Pidge breathes, reaching for her brother’s hand. “Is that a copy of Trauma Center: Under The Knife 2?”

“You bet it is. Found it at a flea market,” Matt grins, bolting out of the room. “Last one to the kitchen has to play second!”

“Hey, no fair! We all know I’m better at Trauma Center than you are!”

Prompt #57. “Just get home as soon as possible, okay?!” + Prompt #72. “Just smile, I really need to see you smile right now.”

“Y/N?!” Shiro exclaimed, jogging up to you with open arms to wrap you in his embrace. “You can’t be on the tarmac, it’s dangerous!”

“I know, I know,” you murmured into his space suit, voice nearly inaudible thanks to the screaming of the nearby aircraft engines. “I just wanted to see you before you left.”

He pulls away to look at you, an incredulous smile stretched onto his face. “You were at the farewell ceremony two hours ago.”

“No, like before before you left!” you countered back. You were still in his arms. You tried not to think about that.

“Alright, alright,” Shiro says with a chuckle and a shake of his head.

“Shirogane!” a voice–Matt Holt, you recognize–calls from a few feet away. “Almost time for liftoff. Hurry up with the sweetheart goodbyes and let’s get going!” Shiro turns pink at that. You’re certain you do, too. 

“Well, can’t say no to Matt,” Shiro grumbles. “He’ll chew me out if I delay this any longer.” He looks back at you. You feel like you’re looking at the Sun. “Truth be told, I was waiting for you.”

Your eyes widen, and it becomes too difficult to look at him directly. “O-Oh.” You bury your face into his chest again, voice muffled. “Well! Just get home as soon as possible, okay?!” Shiro stiffens and places firm hands on your shoulders. 

“Y/N, are you crying?”

You look up at him, teary and snotty. He laughs and ruffles your hair. “Just smile, I really need to see you smile right now. Your smile is the one thing I want to see before I go.”

Wiping your tears, you offer him your widest, brightest, winning smile. He coughs and looks away. He feels like he’s looking at the Sun. “O-Okay. Well. I better go.” He hugs you one more time. “Keep Keith in line for me, okay?”

In the months to come, when Haggar forcibly digs into the mind of the Champion, she finds a memory, one she could tell he visited often. The memory? The bright, sun-stained, tragic, crying, smiling face of a young human girl.  

(There is a catastrophically low number of Sven fics)

85. “I’m not going to be sympathetic until you go to a doctor.”

“Faen! Ouch! Please, be more careful!”

You huff, pulling the bandage around his chest tauter. He winces. “I’m not going to be sympathetic until you go to a doctor, Sven.” You secure the bandage before slapping him upside the head. He flinches and pouts, dark eyes wide and looking at you like a wounded animal. “Don’t give me that look. We’re going to a doctor as soon as the shuttle gets here.”

“No!” he pleas, finding your hand and squeezing it. “Please, elskede! You’ve done a good job with the bandages. No need for space hospital!” His body seizes up and he clutches at the wound. “Ack! Breiddjame!”

“Yes need for space hospital. They’ll just make sure everything’s okay, probably give you some ointment,” you say gently, gaze softening. You kiss him on the nose. “It’s not bad, just a burn from that laser blast I can’t still believe you put yourself right in front of.” You roll your eyes, but you’re smiling. “Ever the martyr, huh, Sven?”

He nods, leaning his forehead against your shoulder. “They were from an alternate universe. I had to make sure they got back home safely.”

94. “I had a bad dream again.”

You find him alone in the kitchen, leaning against the countertop. The lights are off; the only source of light are the ambient blue guide lights lining the walls and floor. 

“Hey,” you say softly from the doorway.

Shiro jumps a bit before looking over at you. He smiles, but it’s a tired smile that doesn’t reach his eyes. His eyes are dark. “Hey, yourself.” He shifts, motioning you to join him in the kitchen. Both of you are in your nightclothes. It’s well past midnight.

You lean over to peer into his mug. “Whatcha got there?”

Shiro smiles again. Tired, again. “It’s honey milk tea. It’s silly, it’s something from an old Japanese film I used to watch when I was a kid. But it’s good.” He leans down to grab another mug from the cupboard. “Want one?”

You grin. “Didn’t even have to ask.”

You’re both silent for a while, satisfied in the shared company and hot honey milk tea (which was, indeed, good). Shiro is the one to speak up first. “Couldn’t sleep either?”

“Yeah,” you admitted. “Too much on my mind. It’d be my mom’s birthday today, back on Earth. You?”

He’s reluctant to answer, you can tell. “I had a bad dream again.” 

You put your mug down and turn to him. “Oh. I’m so sorry, Shiro.” In the moment, it didn’t matter if you and Shiro weren’t an item. It didn’t matter if you were in the middle of an intergalactic war, where feelings are dangerous and nothing but a burden. It didn’t matter if you didn’t know Shiro returned your affections or not. In that moment, he needed you. 

You turn, and wrap your arms around him in an embrace. He’s stiff, and you are about to pull back and apologize and talk about how that was completely out of line, until you feel his arms wrap around you in return, squeezing.

You share a silent embrace for a long time. After a while, but without letting you go, Shiro whispers. “Hey. Thanks.”

97. “You’re not going to starve yourself on Thanksgiving.”

Keith clambers on to the roof, spotting his father sitting and looking up at the sky and chewing tobacco. Overheard an indigo blue spills across the horizon like ink. “Hey, dad? You’ve been up here a long time.”

Keith’s father looks over at him and spits his tobacco. “Yeah. Sorry, buddy. Just been wonderin’ and things.”

Keith walks over to him and sits. “About mom?”

“Yeah,” his father replies, ruffling his son’s hair. “Wonderin’ what she’s up to. Where she be.”

“Why are you looking up into the sky, though?” Keith wonders out loud, now also looking up at the expanse of blue, twinkling celestial bodies blinking in and out of view. The cold desert night air settles heavy on his bones. “Is she up there?”

“Darn right she is,” his father replies. They sit in silence for a time that was both a moment and an eternity. Both wondering. Both dreaming. 

Keith stands up and extends a hand to his father. “Come on, dad. You haven’t had anything to eat all day. You’re not going to starve yourself on Thanksgiving, are you?”

His father laughs and takes his son’s hand. “No, o’ course not.” He pats him on the shoulder. “Let’s go. Think the game hen’s almost done, by the smells o’ things.” He playfully shoves Keith aside and drops down from the roof and onto the ground below. “Race ya to inside!”

“Hey, no fair! You’ve got longer legs!”

Above them, a star twinkles.

[mon-d-i-e-u]

Okay I just returned from watching the production of Les Misérables at Folketeateret in Oslo, and it was amazing! If you have the chance to go see it or if you at least can understand Norwegian I would urge you to watch it asap. It was so great.

I’ll write down some of my favourite tidbits and highlights that I noticed under the cut!

Okay, please note this is in no way a cohesive review, this is more me rambling in no particular order.

The set design was beautiful! They had a spinning stage like they do in The West End and it made the story more dynamic and compelling

Especially the church design was beyond beautiful

All the names were pronounced like they do everywhere else except Lamarque and Javert who were very clearly La Mark and JaVÆR

The exchanges between Valjean/Javert were like lowkey kinky

Including when Javert told Monsieur le Mayor he searched the prisoner believed to be Valjean’s body for the sign that he had the right man

Or when he said he could wait to get him under his whip again

The sound affects and the visuals were great like the snapping of whips and slaves being dragged off staage when they collapsed

All the cursing - I love norwegian theatre

enjoltaire was canon

i repeat e n j o l t a i r e  w a s  c a n o n

with lingering looks, touches and a long kiss during on my own

jehan carrying a plant with him everywhere, to the Musain and to the barricade

Feuilly (?) being recuited in the streets and les amis helping people that were suffering

Feuilly had a freaking sword, why do the fandom think of him as responsible

All the prostitutes were great

Thenardier referring to his patrons as “jævla pissemaur”

Thenardier’s outfits from a kilt in the first scene to a pair of metallic red trousers with a matching top hat in Beggars of the Feast

Like I barely understood him at times but I loved him

Madame Thenardier: “Nå var du faen meg vrang, om jeg spør om noe skal du gjøre det med en gang”

Eponine giving Cosette her doll as a parting gift and later referring to her as her little sister

Their voices were all brilliant

Marius’s curls and his dialect like i l o v e

Whoever thought rhyming “Hvem kan tenke på forelskelse når du kjemper på Champs-Élysées” i love you

Grantaire always holding his hand out in the air after every time Enjolras let it go

“nei dette gidder jeg faen meg ikke”

Montparnasse having a line when they were about to confront Valjean at The Attack on Rue Plumet

It was something along the lines of “okay if you’re going to stay here and chat with Eponine I’ll just start the robbery” or something in that spirit

Speaking of Montparnasse, when he helped carry Eponines body away from the barricade as they pronounced her a saint

I am pretty sure I saw him hug Gavroche before he left and I started crying

Gavroche’s song when he revealed Javert was a fake bitch

Gavroche was great in general and I fell apart when he died

When les amis showed up during Empty Chairs at Empty Tables as ghosts

“Tomme bord og tomme stoler, bare hjertet mitt som slår” - a line from ECAET that broke me, roughly: “Empty tables and empty chairs, only my beating heart remains”

Also in the song he descibed the barricade as “the barricade dyed with blood” also making a reference to the lost brotherhood staining the barricade

That is all I can think of at the moment, but all in all 10/10 would watch again

[elizabethsharmon]

All my dreams are coming true (The perfect ending to a wonderful year)

@yousanaexchange gift for the lovely Jennifer (@lo-cotidiano​) <3 Hope you’ll like it! <3

↳ just the girl squad spending wonderful afternoons together + a surprise birthday party for Sana

Read on AO3

“Okay, just tell me one reason why you don’t want to do this.” Eva said as she and other girls entered the Bakkoush’s household.

“Why?” Noora repeated. “Because it’s stupid? Is it enough of a reason?” she asked holding her shoes in her hands.

“No, it’s not. And besides, it’s not stupid.” Eva insisted.

“I actually agree with Noora, I don’t really like this idea.” Vilde said while hanging her coat on the hook.

“Seriously?” Eva asked surprised. “I thought you would have my back on this, Vilde. After all you were the one who wanted to be a Russ in the first place.”

“Yeah, but not at all cost. Not like that and not now” Vilde frowned.

Meanwhile Sana and Chris were standing in the hallway, amusedly watching the girls banter. They were fighting over this since yesterday and frankly it didn’t look as though they’re going to stop any time soon.

“Are you done?” Sana asked when they finally shut their mouth for a second. They looked at her and Chris, and then at each other, and finally nodded. “Good. Come on then, let’s get something to eat.”

The girls silently followed Sana to the kitchen, only to bump into her when she suddenly froze. Muttering silent “ouch”, the girls followed Sana’s look to find a familiar figure in her kitchen.

“Jamilla!” Sana exclaimed. “What are you doing here?”

“Hey there” Jamilla smiled at them, closing the fridge and putting some vegetables on the counter. “Your mum had some errands to run so I volunteered to babysit you and Elias.” she smirked and walked towards Sana to hug her.

“Babysit me?” Sana asked surprised. “I mean I get babysitting Elias, but me?”

“Ask your mother, not me. I’m just working here.” Jamilla laughed and said ‘hello’ to other girls. “So, are you hungry? A friend of mine gave me a recipe for risotto and I was thinking about trying to make it.”

“Yes, please.” Chris said a little bit too quickly and all the girls burst into laughter.

“Someone called the sanitary inspection to come and check the school’s cafeteria.” Noora explained.

“We managed to get to the nearest café and buy some sandwiches during the lunch break but that’s all we’ve eaten all day.” Eva added.

“So yes, please.” Chris repeated and smiled at Jamilla who still had her arm wrapped around Sana.

“Okay, so we definitely need to do something about that.” Jamilla shook her head. “Can you help with the vegetables?”

“Yeah, of course!” Noora said excitedly. Girls knew how much she loves cooking. Contrary to Sana who wasn’t really that eager to help in the kitchen.

The girls sat around the table, equipped with knives, peelers, cutting boards and vegetables, while Jamilla took care of chicken, rice and stock.

“I still don’t understand why you’re so against taking part in it.” Eva said, once again bringing the hot topic to the table.

“Ugh, Eva. We’ve talked about this already.” Noora replied, clearly bored of having to explain it again.

“I know, but I just don’t get it why you think it’s stupid.” she insisted.

“Because it is?” Noora replied.

“No, it’s not. Only you think it is. Come on, Chris, back me up on this.”

“Yo, you know that I’m all in. It’ll be fun.”

“Vilde?” Eva asked and Vilde looked at her. Her eyes were wet from tears. “Wait, Vilde, are you crying?” she asked and all the girls looked at her concerned.

“What? No, it’s because of the onion.” she laughed and passed the chopped onions to Jamilla. “And I already said it earlier.” she continued as soon as he sat back on the chair. “I agree with Noora on this.”

“Ugh, come on girls! We’ve got to do this!”

“No, we don’t” Noora smiled at threw a bit of the celery stick at Eva.

“It’s a tie now.” Vilde noted. “And since we live in a democratic country, the best way to stop this discussion is to vote.”

“Fine.” Eva agreed. “All those who want to do Russeknuter raise your hands.” Eva and Chris both raised their hands. “And all those who don’t want to do Russeknuter raise your hands.” This time Vilde and Noora raised their hands.

“Sana?” Noora threw another celery stick at Sana who was currently peeling (or more like trying to peel) a carrot.

“You have to pick a side.” Vilde said once Sana looked at them from the carrot.

“Nei, Vilde, I don’t.” Sana smiled.

“Yes, you do.” Eva insisted.

“Nope. I abstain from voting.” she laughed and took another carrot to peel from the pile.

“Sana, come on! Now we’re at the starting point again.” Eva frowned.

“Are you seriously fighting about Russeknuter?” Jamilla snorted. The girls looked at her, carefully stirring rice with a spoon and adding another portion of the stock.

“I’m not.” Sana said. “They are. Since yesterday.”

“Ehh, girls, trust me. You have better things to worry about than knots. How’s it going with those vegetables?” she asked smiling at them and the girls passed them to her.

“So Jamilla… You were on the russebus, right? How was it?” Noora asked leaning on the counter.

“It was fun.” Jamilla answered smiling at the memory of her time in Nissen. “My bus actually managed to win more knots than the bus of those stupid boys from my year. Which definitely makes the whole russ thing fun when I think about it.”

“Wait. You were doing the dare for the knots?” Sana asked surprised.

“No need to sound so surprised, habibti.” Jamilla laughed. “We weren’t doing any immoral stuff, of course. For example, we got a knot for being sober for the entire Russ time. Or we got challenged to wear bread for shoes for a week.” they all burst out with laughter when they heard this.

“And did you do this?” Chris asked amused.

“No, we didn’t. I think some other group did it after all. But we declined. There are so many people who have nothing to eat that it didn’t seem fair for us to waste food like this for ‘fun’.” she emphasized the last one with quotation marks. “Instead we made our bus a safe place. We had plenty of water and fruits and blankets so basically we were rescuing all those who drunk too much and realized that partying like that is not as liberating as they thought it is.”

“Wow. That’s a cool idea.” Eva admitted.

“You never told me about this.” Sana noted.

“Well, you never asked.” Jamilla smirked and continued to stir the risotto.

They were talking and laughing over the empty plates, when someone opened the front door and out of the sudden the whole house was filled with loud voices of Elias and his friends.

“Guys, guys, wait.” they heard Mikael’s voice from the hallway. “What is it?”

“Fy faen, it smells so good.” Mutta sighed.

“Wait, I’ll ask my mum if we can get some.” Elias said and soon started to walk to the kitchen shouting “Mum! Mum, did you left some of that delicious food for us?”

“Unfortunately not, habibti.” Jamilla said with a straight face as soon as Elias and the rest of the boys entered the kitchen, while the girls burst out with laughter. “But there’s still some stock left on the stove so I guess you can have it.”

“Jamilla? What are you doing here?” Elias asked surprised.

“What am I doing here? Well, your mother asked me to babysit you.” she replied and Adam and Mikael laughed, while Mutta and Yousef seemed to only focus their attention on Chris and Sana from the moment they entered the room. “Oh look at them, they’re so unbelievably cute.” Jamilla smiled and rested her face on her hand while looking at Sana and Yousef.

“Yes, they are.” Noora crinkled her nose and smiled at them. As soon as Sana and Yousef noticed that suddenly they are in the center of attention, they looked away (clearly embarrassed that they were exposed like this) and blushed.

“Well, these two are not that bad either.” Eva nudged Chris with elbow and the girl giggled while Mutta just looked at them dumbstruck with a goofy smile.

“Fy faen, can you lovebirds just get a room or something or at least give us something to eat and drink before you disappear in the void of each other’s stares, okay?” Adam said and sat down heavily next to Vilde.

“Well, you parasites treat our kitchen as some sort of a free dining room so why don’t you for once either buy something to eat or prepare something for all of us?” Sana asked with her typical death stare and a little smirk visible on her face.

“Wow, Sana. You’re not going to let your boyfriend starve to death, are you?” Mikael asked offended.

“First of all, I’m pretty sure that he can cook so if he’s hungry he can prepare something for himself. I wish I could say the same about the rest of you but we all know the truth. And secondly, humans can survive a whole month without eating anything before they die from starvation so ask me this question in 29 days.” she replied. She could see with a corner of her eye that Yousef was trying really hard to hold back laughter.

“Man, she’s a monster.” Adam said to Yousef. “Run while you still can.”

“So you said that there’s stock left?” Yousef asked Jamilla, completely ignoring Adam’s comment.

“Yep. On the stove.”

“Do you have any noodles?” he asked Elias.

“Why are you asking me, man? Do I look like someone who would know?” he asked back.

“Certainly not.” Sana interjected.

“Oh like you’re such a great cook yourself, aren’t you Sana?” Yousef winked at her.

“Okay, that’s not cool.” she said offended. “You should be on my side. I actually did plenty of things here today. You can ask girls who peeled all the carrots for the risotto if you don’t believe me.”

“Oh yes, Sana’s help was invaluable.” Jamilla laughed wrapping her arm around Sana and placing a soft kiss on her forehead.

“No okay, know you’re all just making fun of me.” Sana cringed. “Come on, girls, we’ve got work to do.” she stood up, took her things and started to walk to the kitchen’s door.

“Oi, Sana, come on. We are joking you know that.” Adam said.

“Yes. I know.” she said. “But I’d still like to be excluded from this narrative, thank you very much.” she walked out of the kitchen and Chris and Eva followed her, while Vilde and Noora stayed in the kitchen and sat closer to Jamilla.

“Okay, listen.” Noora whispered. “We’re making a surprise birthday party for Sana. The day before Christmas Eve, my place.”

“You’re coming, right?” Vilde asked.

“Yes, of course!” Jamilla said excitingly. “Do you need me to help you with anything or ...”

“Noora, Vilde, are you coming or what?!” Sana shouted from her room, interrupting Jamilla’s question.

“Yes, we’re coming!” Noora shouted back to Sana and got up on her feet. “I’ll send you all the details and add you to the groupchat later, okay?” she whispered to Jamilla who nodded and smiled. They couldn’t wait for it.

                                                          ***

“Remind me again why I agreed to go ice-skating with you.” Sana inquired, putting the skates on her feet.

“Because it’s fun!” Vilde exclaimed.

“And because you wanted to spend some time with us.” Noora winked at her. “And we all know that spending time together is always a good idea.”

“What’s taking you so long?” Chris inquired from the ice rink. She and Eva have already started skating.

“Ask Sana!” Noora shouted back and smiled at her.

“Sana, come on!” Eva walked out of the rink, grabbed Sana’s hands and helped her get up from the bench. “Let’s go!”

Sana, Eva and Noora joined Chris on the ice, laughing at Noora who fell over as soon as she got on the ice.

“Noora, are you alright?” Eva skated to her and helped her get back on her feet.

“I’m fine, I’m fine!” she assured them and laughed.

“Where’s Vilde?” Chris asked and all of them started to look around, only to find out that Vilde is still sitting on the bench.

“Vilde! Come on! Why are you still there?” Eva asked and walked towards her.

“I… I haven’t told you that earlier, but I kind of… don’t know how to skate?” she said quietly.

“Oh, Vilde.” Eva said softly and hugged her friend. “Come on, I’ll teach you everything. We’ll take these fun skating penguins! I’m the master of ice skating, don’t you know?” she winked at her, making Vilde laugh.

After two hours on the ice rink – quite literally, as all of them (except Eva) ended up on ice so many times – Noora invited the girls to the kollektivet for a hot chocolate.

“Ouch!” Vilde exclaimed. “I don’t know how I’ll get of the bed tomorrow, everything hurts me.”

“Ugh, same”. Chris nodded.

“Oh, don’t worry, you’ll be fine.” Eva said, wrapping her arms around Chris and Vilde.

“Says someone who hasn’t fallen over even once?” Noora asked amused.

“What can I say? I told you I’m a great skater.” Eva said proudly.

“I’m never going skating with you again.” Sana said.

“What? Why?” Eva inquired offended.

“It’s because Sana doesn’t like when someone’s better at something than her.” Noora said before Sana even opened her mouth.

“Well… yeah. True. That’s the reason, I guess.” Sana giggled as Noora opened the door to her flat.

It was unusually dark and quiet inside and it seemed as though no one was there. Sana saw the disturbed look on Noora’s face and could sense that something’s going on. Noora started to walk towards the living room, girls right behind her. When she turned on the light, suddenly the people shouting “SURPRISE” jumped out from behind the couch and doors of Linn’s and Eskild’s bedrooms. They all started singing “Happy Birthday” and only then Sana noticed the “Happy Birthday Sanasol” sign pinned to the ceiling.

“Aah, I can’t believe you’re here!” Sana said hugging Jamilla tightly.

“Of course, how could I miss this? Anyway, this is from me and your brother.” she said and gave Sana a beautifully wrapped present. When Sana opened it, she was speechles. Inside was a gorgeous red hijab with star pins.

“This is so beautiful, Jamilla!” Sana exclaimed and hugged her again. “Thank you so much!”

“I had a feeling this colour will suit you.” Jamilla winked at her.

And she was right. Sana could already imagine what she will wear on the first day of school after New Year. Black jeans, black sweater, black shoes. Red hijab and red lipstick. She is going to look totally badass. For the last couple of months she changed her style completely, she started to wear colourful outfits again, to the surprise of some people (for example her mum). But every now and then she loved getting back in her old black clothes. She used to use them as her shield, they were her defense against everything and everyone, but now whenever she wore all black she just felt so good, so badass, so bitchin’. She put the gift from Jamilla and Karim on the pile of other gifts – custom-made bracelet with a little gold sun tag with “Happy 18th birthday, Sanasol! We love you!” she got from girls, four volume set of Wreck This Journal from Elias, Adam, Mikael and Mutta (she wasn’t sure if they thought it’s a cool gift or they wanted to annoy her as she specifically told them once that she doesn’t see the point in paying lots of money to buy something as ridiculous as this), Christmas sweater with squirrels from Eskild and Linn (“Everyone needs at least one ugly Christmas sweater in their closet.” he said. Not that it matter she’s a Muslim and doesn’t celebrate Christmas at all), the star mug with tea bags set from Isak and Even. But she still hasn’t received a present from one person. She looked around the room, trying to find him. The girls and Eskild and Linn were decorating a Christmas tree while singing some songs, the balloon boys were recording something on their phones, Even and Isak were making out on the couch, and Jamilla was talking on the phone. But the person she was trying to find wasn’t anywhere to be seen. Sana started to walk towards the kitchen (‘if he is anywhere, that’s probably the place’ she thought), but then she saw with the corner of her eye the figure standing in the hallway. He was leaning against the wall under the mistletoes. She walked towards him and stood on the opposite side of the room. She could see him smile as soon as she approached him, but he was still looking at his feet instead of her.

“So…” she began and he finally dared to look at her. “I still haven’t got one present.”

“Is that so?” he asked grinning at her.

“Yes.” she nodded. “Anyway, why are you here and not there with the boys?” she asked.

“Because you were there…”

“Okay…” she was really confused at his reply.

“…and you look so beautiful today that I began to worry that I might die from the amount of cuteness.” he finished and blushed while Sana burst out with laughter.

Indeed, she was looking exceptionally beautiful today – black skinny jeans, beige oversized sweater and hijab of the same colour. As soon as she put on these clothes in the morning she knew this outfit was on point.

“What’s up with that mistletoe by the way?” Yousef asked just as S Club 7’s “Perfect Christmas” started playing.

Sana looked at the ceiling and giggled. She was here when Eskild hanged them up. He said that he’s not going to take the risk of someone passing right next to him and not kissing him (“We all deserve love during Christmas”, she recalled him saying), so instead of just one mistletoe he attached around seven of them to the ceiling so that they were in one line and no one could go inside without walking under them. Now Sana and Yousef were standing on their two ends.

“Eskild.” Sana said thinking it would be a sufficient explanation and indeed it was. “So… what about my gift?” she smiled at him.

“Fy faen, Sana, you’re so impatient! You’re aware of that, aren’t you? You can’t just wait five minutes, can you?” he laughed.

“Nope. You know that. And you love that in me.” she said, showing off her dimples.

“Yeah, I do.” he blushed, took his backpack from the ground and get the present out of it. He walked closer to her so that now they were standing just centimeters away from each other. “Happy birthday, Sana.”

She hesitantly peered into the bag and inside was a box tied with ribbon.

“Really?” she asked annoyed.

“If you thought you could get your present so easily, you were wrong.” he grinned at her and she just rolled her eyes.

She untied the ribbon and lifted the lid. When she saw what’s inside she just started laughing.

“Have you become his fan or what?” Sana asked amused.

“Nei. I just thought it would match perfectly my jersey and I didn’t want you to stand out in the crowd once we go and see him play one day.” he said.

“Oh, so basically you bought this for me so you wouldn’t look stupid because you came to see a game with someone not wearing anything from the official store?”

“Yeah, basically.” he winked at her as inside the box was nothing else than a Golden State Warriors Stephen Curry black hoodie. “Come on, you have to admit it. I gave you a lot nicer present than you gave me.”

“Excuse me but what’s wrong with the plush swan I gave you?” she asked offended. “Is it because it’s plush or is it because it’s a swan?”

“No offence, but both.” he laughed.

“Ah, how can you say something like this to me?” she poked him in the arm and pouted.

“Oh come on, Sana, don’t be mad.” he begged.

“I won’t but only because I know from Elias that you sleep with it.” she grinned at him.

“I’m…. what??? I’m not…” he mumbled, trying to think of some excuse and make Sana believe that it’s not true, only to come to the conclusion that she can see through him either way so there’s no point in trying to lie. “I don’t have any words. I’m so going to kill him.” he said making her laugh. “Just… Damn you and your brother. Why are you like this? Seriously though, is this hereditary? Should I be worried? Are our kids going to be like this, too?”

“Our kids?” she asked astonished.

“You know what I mean.” he blushed.

“I do, but I still want you to say it.” she said showing off her dimples.

“I…”

“Oh la la, look at these two lovebirds!” they heard Adam’s voice.

When Sana and Yousef turned their heads, they saw Adam and Mikael standing in the corridor and filming everything on the phone. It seemed they wanted to add something more, but they went back to the living room as soon as they saw Sana’s death stare, Mikael just patted Adam on his back and whispered “Okay, man, we’d better get out of here asap.”

“I am seriously going to kill them one day.” Yousef shook his head. He looked at Sana who was grinning at him. “What?” he asked confused.

“Nothing. I was just thinking about that mistletoe…”

“Yeah? And what about it?” he smiled shyly.

“I don’t know. We’ll have to find out.” she shrugged and put both of her arms around Yousef’s neck. He wrapped his arms around her waist. They were standing like this for a few minutes, the verses of “Perfect Christmas” still echoing in Sana’s ears.

 All our dreams are coming true at last… oooh

 The perfect ending to a wonderful year

“Happy birthday, Sana Bakkoush.” he whispered into her ear.

 Would be to celebrate the good times with you here

“Thank you, Yousef Acar.”

 Cuz I know

 For sure

 I never wanted anything more

‘Yes’, Sana thought, ‘it sounds about right’.

                                                         *** 

Okay so first of all, I'm not Norwegian so all the things I know about Russ come from the internet so I'll just copy+paste links I used during my research for this fic here: - explenation of the knots - bread shoes - Jamilla's bus inspired by Jennifer's answer and this

The presents Sana received: - ugly Christmas sweater from Eskild - mug from Isak and Even - hoodie from Yousef

Finally, Sana's look on the birthday party inspired by Iman's photo

[stressedoutteenager]

Memories

I combined the following prompts for this:

Yousef's thoughts during the Fy Faen clip while the whole group is on the tram/train and Yousef notices Sana being a little distanced from the others so he decides to go close to her...

Sana and Yousef married for a couple of years and they tell eachother how they felt in their first dates "the best of islam" "maghrib" (...) married yousef telling sana smth like he wanted to kiss and hug her all the time but he was not going to rush cause he knew that

Hi! I would really love some more married Yousana-prompts. Anything from a lazy Saturday together (...)

Yousana prompt: the first time they hold hands.

Please let me know what you think :D

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You'll fall into a routine, they said.

You'll barely see each other once you start working, they said.

You'll feel like you're reliving the same day after a while, they said.

A lot of people had quite a bit to say about what Sana and Yousef's life would look like once they got married and actually lived together. Most of them didn't mean it in a negative way; they thought they're just telling the couple what will inevitably happen.

Well, it's been almost three years and none of that has happened yet. 

This is the first Saturday in months they're spending at home. Whenever they both have a free day, they go out and do whatever they feel like doing. Whenever they come back from work, no matter how late it is, they spend time together, sometimes just recapping what happened during the day. It never really feels like either of them relives the same day over and over. 

As exciting as their lives together can be with a different activity every day, it feels nice to just have a lazy Saturday in their home. They filled their coffee table with food and sweets and both have a cup of coffee in their hands.

Sana is leaning on one armrest of the couch, Yousef on the other. Their legs tangled in the middle. Yousef takes a sip of his coffee but doesn't look away from Sana while doing that. Just sitting here, drinking coffee and being close to his wife ... that's when he feels most comfortable.

"You want to know what I dreamt about last night?", Sana asks her husband. It's barely noon and after their long breakfast they sat down in the living room and barely moved. 

Yousef nods. "Do you even need to ask?"

Sana shakes her head, laughing, and making her hair fall out of her bun. Yousef's eyes instinctively follow the movement and he smiles to himself. Still in her pyjamas, without any make-up and her hair a little messy - he admires how beautiful she is.

"Okay, but don't laugh.", Sana says and sits up a little straighter. 

Yousef just tilts his head a little to the side and nods. 

"I dreamt of that time you and the guys came to that party with my friends and I. The first time we went to a party all together, remember?", Sana explains.

Yousef starts smiling and nods. "Of course I remember that. How would I not?" Sana smiles at him, head leaning on the backrest of the couch. "What did you dream then?"

"I actually don't remember all of it. But I dreamt of how you guys walked up to us with the balloons."

"I remember you not looking very impressed with that.", Yousef laughs at the memory. He was so excited to go out with Sana. And her friends, but they were not why he was so excited.

Sana thinks back at that day. She knows what he means. Well, that day she was not happy about seeing him at first.

"The girls wanted to hook you up with Noora. I didn't want you guys there because I thought they'd succeed.", Sana confessed. That was years ago bit she still remembers how it felt.

Yousef chuckles lightly but shakes his head: "I never was interested in her, you know that."

"I know that now. But then, I felt like it made sense for you two to end up together."

Yousef leans forward and takes Sana's free hand in his and shakes his head. "Do you remember how I came over to you on the tram on the way there? Why would I have done that if I wanted to be with anyone else but you?"

Sana rolls her eyes. He doesn't get it, he still doesn't after all these years.

"Yousef, you're a generally nice guy. I thought you were just being nice.", then she smiles a little, "But you can't imagine how happy I was when you did join me there."

"But you loved to avoid my eyes.", Yousef reminds her. "You know, I had to find so much courage to go over to you. I thought to myself, okay. She's standing there alone. Now is the time to join her and talk. I was so nervous you wouldn't react and when you at first didn't really look at me my heart sunk."

"Ooh, don't say that! I didn't know! And: I was so shy around you that I couldn't physically look at you for more than a few seconds."

"Aww, how cute! Little did you know that I only came to that party after Elias mentioned that you'd be there. And when I saw you standing distanced from the rest of us I had to do something. And I hated whoever called you in that exact moment.", Yousef reminisces. He didn't know how he would go over to Sana without being too obvious about his crush.

Sana almost chokes on her coffee and starts laughing. "That was my mother."

"I love your mother but she did interrupt us more than once, if you remember.", Yousef says thinking back to the very beginning of their relationship.

Sana puts down her now empty cup and also takes Yousef's. Her eyes wander over the table that is full of food and decides on the chocolate cake they had made.

"After you walked me home. The day we brought Elias to Noora's.", Sana remembers. All of that was years ago but Sana remembers everything as if it was yesterday.

She takes a bite of the cake and offers Yousef some. He just leans forward and opens his mouth, so Sana holds out the fork with cake to him. While chewing he opens his mouth to talk but Sana kicks him lightly. He acts offended and glares at her playfully but waits to talk until he's done eating.

"Girl, you made me so nervous then! All I wanted that day, after having brought Elias there, was to spend a little bit of time with you. At that time I didn't know how to initiate anything because I didn't know if you liked me."

Sana leans back again and remembers that day. She had declined walking with him before agreeing. She's so glad that she did agree in the end. Just thinking about that evening makes her smile broadly.

"I don't even know how we ended up on that basketball court.", Sana says. "But I'm so happy we did. After you told me you were not Muslim I thought that was it. Nothing would happen between us. That it was not possible. But talking with you about it made me realize ... it's fine because we share the same values. And look at us now. That is, to this day, one of the best conversations I had. Even when we disagreed on something so big we could talk about it without becoming aggressive."

Yousef listens to his wife remembering how she felt that day. He is so in love with this woman and at that point in their relationship he was pretty sure they'd end up together if she gave him a chance. And watching her fondly smile at the memories makes him smile.

"I'm going to be honest here. It started out rough that evening. I honestly thought you didn't enjoy walking with me so I said and did childish things to just get any reaction from you. But once we started playing basketball all that tension went away. And you already know this but you were the first person I ever told all that. You made me feel comfortable enough to open up. And I kept thinking about that evening for days. Maybe weeks."

"You're still a bit childish.", Sana comments when he stops talking and they both burst into laughter.

"That's what you got from all that? Really?"

Sana presses her lips together and shakes her head. "Don't be mad, pleeease. I love you!"

Yousef narrows his eyes at her playfully. He just grumbles an 'I love you, too'. She's too cute for him to get mad at her. It rarely happens.

Sana rolls her eyes at him smilingly, puts the plate down on the table and crawls over to Yousef. She puts her hands on either side of him on the armrest and kisses him.

"You're not mad, are you?", she asks him. After the kiss she didn't move much, only millimetres and now she looks at him with hopeful eyes.

He shakes his head and puts his arms around her waist. She settles right next to him, leaning her head lighting on his shoulder.

"You're too cute for me to be mad at you.", Yousef says and kisses her cheek.

Sana turns her head to him and narrows her eyes. "Stop calling me cute all the time."

"But you are cute!", Yousef answers because he knows what kind of affect it has on her.

Sana crosses her arms over her chest and mumbles: "Ah, I hate you."

"You just told me you love me!"

"Well, now I hate you!", Sana answers grumpily.

Yousef hugs her close and nuzzles his face in the crook of her neck.

Knowing very well that she's joking but wanting to hear her say I love you again, he asks her: "You really hate me?", in the most innocent voice he can muster up.

Sana sighs. "Dude, I literally married you. Of course I don't hate you!"

They both laugh at that. Sana is probably the only one who can make calling her husband 'Dude' sound so nice.

For a few silent moments they sit there, Sana in Yousef's arms and both are content with how their lives turned out so far. Sure, it was not all sunshine and rainbows in the past but where they are right now in their lives, that where they always want to be.

"Want to know what I'm thinking of right now?", Yousef whispers in Sana's ear.

"Hmm.", she makes an agreeing sound.  "Our first hug, years ago. The night before I left for vacation."

"How so?", Sana asks. Why would he think of specially that right now?                      

Yousef thinks back at that day and remembers the mixed feelings he had. "Because for the most part, I was unbelievably happy that evening. I spend the last night before being away for two months with you. I had almost given up at that time."

"Ooh, you want to look up the Video? The one where you can see your reaction to me calling?", Sana perks up and leans a bit away to be able to look at him.

He rolls his eyes and shakes his head: "No! We're not doing that. I still hate Mikael for not editing all that out!"

"And I still love him for not editing that out! It's good payback for making me think you couldn't meet me. I accepted that but it made my heart ache. And you were only joking!", Sana says to that. She was so nervous about calling him and asking if he could meet her and he had the nerve to joke like that. Looking back it's funny but in that moment she felt crushed.

"Hey, don't be like that! I was so afraid that you'd take that serious that I couldn't even keep it up for a minute."

Sana leans back against his shoulder again but turns so that she can look at him anyway.

"That was such a bittersweet evening, though. I had a really good time. I mean, I knew I wanted to be with you but that evening made me realize that all my worries at that time about us being together... that they were not so big of problems. My mom had told me I would need someone to remind me from time to time why I believe and you did exactly that. You keep doing that if I need it.", Sana realizes that she is not sure if she ever told him that. She always thought it but did she ever voice these thoughts?

Yousef looks at her with the most loving look on his face which makes Sana peck his cheek.

"And we had so much fun. You being 'attacked' by the swan? Iconic. I'll never get over it!", Sana adds and starts laughing.

Yousef laughs with her but shakes his head. "Those animals are evil."

"Yeah, they definitely are.", Sana says in an sarcastic tone.

This time Yousef leans away a bit to be able to look at his wife. "You were really mean that day?"

Sana stops to think. Was she? No, she wasn't. She definitely wasn't. So she looks at Yousef with a confused look and he starts laughing.

"I mean, because you looked so good! You always look good but that evening! You know, it was never about physical stuff for me.", Sana nods at that. He was always so respectful and especially that day she was the one to initiate any kind of physical contact, not him. "But that evening, I couldn't stop thinking about wanting to hug you, at some point even kiss you. You were so mean looking so good all evening, being funny and just the way you are. But I knew I could wait. Because I knew if you were willing to give me a chance, that we'd be in for the long run and I didn't mind waiting as long as you need."

Sana looks at her husband in amazement. How is he so considerate and cute and the best husband anyone can wish for? To not get too emotional on this Saturday she adds something.

"We did hug, though."

Yousef nods with a big smile. They did. Again, she initiated it. Both times. The first hug was not a goodbye hug. It was a 'I'm glad we're here, together, and thank you for the great time' kind of hug.  Yousef was so excited and nervous that he feared Sana would feel his unbelievably fast heartbeat.

"O my God, that was the same night you held my hand for the first time!", Yousef exclaims suddenly as that thought comes to his mind.

Sana starts laughing at his sudden outburst, seeing as they were talking calmly for the past minutes.

Remembering that evening Sana gets excited all over again. "Do you know how much it took of me to reach for your hand on the way back? I only managed when we were 5 minutes away from my house."

Sana remembers walking next to him, so close that their hands touched every few seconds but he didn't reach out to hold her hand. Sana knew that Yousef just tried to be respectful and not cross any boundaries and she was so thankful for that. But in that moment it would've made it all easier if he just held her hand. Yousef knows he wanted it really badly but Sana doesn't.

"But you did." Yousef smiles and adds: "That was a lucky evening for me."

The second hug of that evening was in front of the Bakkoush house. Still holding hands both had looked at the window, at that one window. Gladly, they had noticed that there was no one at the window.

"Hey, but the goodbye hug... that was not all me!", Sana claims. And she's right.

Yousef nods and plays a little with the loose strands of hair around Sana's face.

"I was about to leave for two months of vacation after having that amazing date with you. I couldn't help myself. I had to give you a goodbye hug!", Yousef confesses.

Sana smiles, showing him her dimples which makes him cup her cheek and let his thumb wander over it.

"It was a bit awkward at first. We both went to hug the other at the same time but not knowing that the other would do that.", Sana remembers and shakes her head. If that doesn't describe their early relationship then she doesn't know what does.

Yousef hugs Sana close and kisses the top of her head. Remembering how this all started, and seeing that they are married now. He knew even then that he wanted to be with Sana for the rest of his life. He knew that it wasn't just a stupid crush he'd get over. That was not a possibility to him.

"I was so happy when we got to say goodbye without your mother interrupting us by calling you."

"Me too."

Two times Sana's mother had interrupted them; that one time she didn't. That one time might have changed the direction of their relationship and now they are married.

[chillerhjemmeisak]

in your evak fanfic you called their son jonah and thats so cute because its so obviously because of jonas so i was wondering if you could writ something about the isak telling jonas that he was going to same his son after him pleaseeee

I loved this prompt and got super caught up in it! Sorry it’s so long but ENJOY

It wasn’t often thatIsak had the free time to do this; having the boys over had become ararity over the years.

So having them over while Even was at work was an unexpected but welcome development.

As each of them hadgrown older and grown apart, their lives had taken over. Adulthoodwas nothing like high school, with responsibilities around everycorner and not a moment of free time in sight.

Mahdi had briefly movedto Denmark after university before deciding that the language wasjust too “potato” for him to handle. When he had returned, he hadtaken to teaching, something that no one had really expected of him.But with the same sort of dedication he showed his universitystudies, Mahdi took to shaping the lives of little kids in Oslo. Hisjob meant that his only free days became the weekend, when the boys’regular jobs decided to be particularly busy.

Magnus was a proudwaiter. Where others had bullied him for such a minimalistic careergoal, Magnus had always enjoyed social situations and found hiscalling in attending to others. He never let dismissive comments gounnoticed and never allowed anyone to look down on him. Even oftenvoiced his praise for Magnus’ strength, something that had certainlytaken a long time to develop. Unlike in highschool, Magnus no longertook anyone’s crap.

Except the boys’. Hewould always be the punching bag of the group, whether he liked it ornot.

Jonas had become apolitician to the surprise of absolutely no one; fighting primarilyfor civil rights and against the seemingly endless stream of corruptpolitical influences. He had become as headstrong in his personallife as he was in his professional one, becoming a strict but lovingfather to his and Eva’s first child; Frida.

In the many years thatIsak’s busy career had threatened to sever the friendship he sharedwith Jonas, both men had changed and evolved to accommodate theirdeveloping lives. For not a moment had their friendship wavered.

And it was forprecisely that reason that Isak had asked Even if he could name theirsecond child. Even, having graced Belle with the name of hisfavourite Disney princess, had agreed immediately as long as Isakpromised their child would have a meaningful name. Isak had arguedthat, claiming that a Disney princess was hardly ‘meaningful’ butEven had remained ignorant.

Looking back, Isakcan’t help but wonder if Even had known that Isak was a sentimentalloser and wouldn’t hesitate to make their child’s name ridiculouslycheesy.

And so, just to proveEven sickeningly right, Isak had gone for as meaningful a name as hecould.

But where chosing thesappy name had been easy, the name coming without hesitation,delivering the news came as a struggle to Isak who, despite years byEven’s side, continued to struggle with displaying emotion.

Isak blamed his job;doctor’s were notorious for struggling with grappling basic emotions.He was no exception.

“Y'know, if you wentdown on her I’m sure she’d fogive you.”

Magnus’ words tore Isakfrom his train of thought and he immediately felt himself cringe.“Serr, Magnus?”

Everyone looked at Isakwhen he spoke for the first time in what Isak presumed was a longtime. Magnus looked confused by his outburst but Mahdi and Jonas weregrinning widely.

“What?” Magnusdemanded. “I was just telling Mahdi that if Isabel is pissed athim, maybe it might help.”

Mahdi rolled his eyesdramatically. “You really don’t get it to do?” he laughed. “Ican’t just go down on my wife and hope that’s apology enough, youidiot.”

Jonas snickered atMahdi’s words. “He’s right Mags. You’re married, surely youunderstand that women don’t drop things that easily.”

Magnus shrugged, “Vildealways forgives me if I go down on her.”

Isak gaped at them,shocked and confused by how their discussion about their kids hadsomehow morphed into him hearing about Magnus going down on Vilde. Asmuch as Isak loved both parties, he could survive withou the imagesplaguing his dreams.

Or should he saynightmares.

“You do it, rightIsak?”

Isak turned hisattention back to the boys at the sound of his name. “What?

“You must do the samething to Even right? If he’s pissed at you, he gets head. Right?”

If Isak thought Magnuscouldn’t have gotten more dense after high school ended then he wasproven severely wrong. Rolling his eyes and moaning exaggeratedly,Isak settled back into the chair and glared at Magnus.

“No Magnus”, hegroaned. “We talk it out. Like adults.”

“But then he gets ablowjob, right?”

The grin on Magnus’sface made Isak recoil in horror.

“Dude he’s nottelling you that”, Jonas piped up, his smile hidden behind hishand. Isak glared at him for daring to laugh.

Magnus sighed loudly.“Why does no one tell me anything?”

“We tell youeverything”, Mahdi defended. “Just not about blowjobs.”

“Or sex in general”,Jonas added.

Magnus’s frowndeepened. “But best friends are supposed to talk about that sort ofthing.”

Isak dropped his headinto his hands with a sigh. “Magnus”, he began, looking at hisfriend through the gaps of his fingers. “We would talk about thatsort of thing if you weren’t so damn interested. It’s kinda creepy.”

Jonas and Mahdi snortedat Isak’s words and Magnus looked away, offended.

“Anyway”, Jonaslaughed, clapping his hands together. “I have news!”

The room fellobediently silent as the boys looked expectantly at Jonas, who wasbeaming widely.

“Eva and I are havinganother baby.”

Where moments ago theroom was silent, it suddenly burst into action. Isak propelledhimself towards his best friends, throwing his arms around him and helaughed wholeheartedly. “I’m so happy for you guys”, he cheered,patting Jonas on the back in affection.

Jonas laughed intoIsak’s ear, clearly elated. “Thanks bro, me too.”

“Move out the wayIsak!” Magnus complained, displeased that he hadn’t given Jonas ahug too.

Isak chuckled butpealed himself away from his best friend, moving back to his chair.He seemed unable to control the bouncing of his leg as he waited toshare his own news.

After a few minutesMagnus seemed to have his full and moved away, leaving Mahdi open topat Jonas’s back in a bro hug.

Jonas was beaming whenMahdi pulled away, his cheeks red with heat.

“So, how long?”Mahdi asked.

“20 weeks”, Jonassighed happily.

Isak immediately shot up. “Dude!Fy faen! Why didn’t you tell me!”

Jonas looked a littlesheepish at Isak’s outburst. “Because I wanted to wait to tell youso that I could tell you something else at the same time. You know,make it all dramatic and stuff.”

Isak rolled his eyes athis best friend but sat back down. “But I saw Eva like 3 weeks agoand she didn’t look 20 weekspregnant!”

Jonasshrugged, “It’s there but its small, you’re right.”

Isakcouldn’t help but feel a deep sense of betrayal at that, genuinelyoffended by his friend’s unwillingness to share the news. I mean,Isak had told Jonas about Belle the second their request to adopt hadbeen confimed, even though Jonas had been in Portugal at the time.The bill Isak racked up calling him had been well worth it.

Orso he thought.

Fora moment, Isak couldn’t help but scold himself for his dramatics.Were Even there, he would be rubbing a soothing hand across Isak’sback to calm him down. Imagining exactly that, Isak sighed andsettled back into his chair, looking expecantly at Jonas for anexplanation.

“Imean if we’re all sharing news without telling our best friends firstthen I guess I’m next”, Isak said when Jonas seemed too reluctantto speak, his eyes flitting about nervously. “The adoption wentthrough. We’re getting another baby.”

Jonas’spreviously torn expression transformed into one of sheer joy as hisface tore apart into a grin. “No way!”

Magnusscreamed, jumping from his chair. “You’re both having another kidat the same time?! This is some psychic shit!”

Mahdirolled his eyes, quickly reaching across to clasp Isak’s hand incongratulations. Isak nodded gratefully back. “I think that’sawesome Isak”, Mahdi beamed. “You guys are awesome parents.”

Isakgrinned smugly; of course they were.

“Areyou trying to steal my thunder or something?” Jonas joked, standingto walk to Isak. Isak chuckled as he stood to accept Jonas’s hug.

Jonassqueezed Isak tightly, to the point where Isak genuinely worried forhis spine, which felt about ready to snap. With another squeez, Jonasdropped his head to Isak’s shoulder.

“I’mso happy for you man”, Jonas sighed against Isak’s ear.

Isaksmiled softly, his arms tightening around Jonas reflectively.“Thanks”, he whispered back, eyes wet.

Jonasgrinned as he pulled away. He reached up to wipe away Isak’s straytear. “You’ll kill it, just like last time.”

“Sowill you”, Isak nodded firmly.

Themoment was broken, unsurprisingly, by Magnus. “You guys are socute! You’re almost as cute as ‘Evak'”

Jonasand Isak recoiled slightly. “Don’t compare our friendship to Isakand Even’s romantic and, more importantly, sexual relationship pleaseMags.”

Magnuslooked unphased. “Seriously, it’s awesome!”

Isakrolled his eyes at Magnus, who finally stood to hug Isak. Isakcouldn’t stop himself from squealing slightly when Magnus lifted himoff his feet in the hug.

“Dude!”Isak complained when Magnus set him down again.

Magnusignored his complaint. “When is Even getting home?” he askedexcitedly. “I wanna congratulate him.”

Isaklooked across at Jonas, exasperated. Depsite the years that hadpassed, Magnus was still just as taken with Even as he was the firsttime they met, and remained obssessed with him. Lucky for him, Evenfound it rather endearing and entertained Magnus’ affections kindly.

“Inabout two hours”, Isak said as he sat back down. “Anyway, Iactually have more news.”

Mahdithrew his head back. “You’re not like… having a third kid areyou? We can only deal with two baby announcements in one day!”

Isaksnickered but shook his head. “Not yet”, he said, ignoringJonas’s raised eyebrow and coy smile. “I actually meant I have somenews for Jonas, well… mostly Jonas.”

Jonas’ssmile settled at that and he sat forward in anticipation. “Just soyou know, I have to tell you something in a minute too.”

Isaklooked at Jonas in confusion.

“Isaid I waited to tell you about Eva for a reason. But anyway, I’lltell you in a minute. Tell me your news first”, Jonas saidexcitedly.

“Okay”,Isak began, clasping his hands together to fiddle with his fingersnervously. Looking at his best friend through his lashes, Isakblushed. “So, it’s a boy first of all.”

Magnuslet out a little cheer at that and Isak couldn’t help but smile atit.

“Andwell… since Even named Belle, we agreed that I’d get to name thisone.”

Jonasstraightened up slightly, his eyes widening and a smile spreadingacross his face. Isak cursed slightly, annoyed that Jonas had seemedto figure it out.

“AndI, uh… Well, I wanted to call him Jonah. If- if that was cool withyou”, Isak stuttered awkwardly. He could almost see Even rollinghis eyes in his head.

Jonassimply cocked his head, his eyes soft and full of affection. “You’ddo that?”

Isaknodded immediately. “Of course.”

Jonasgrinned, nodding too. “Jonas is a pretty fucking awesome name toget inspiration from I suppose.”

“Ass”,Isak chuckled, shaking his head fondly.

Aftera moment, Isak looked up at his best friend and saw a small butknowing smile on his face. Isak looked at Jonas, eyebrows furrowingin adorable confusion.

Jonaslooked almost close to tears as he chuckled, his smile affectionate.“I waited to tell you about Eva until we knew the gender; just so Icould get an idea and me and Eva could get a name.”

Isaksquinted in further confusion. “Why-Why would you need a namebefore telling me?”

Mahdisnorted beside him and Isak shot him a look in surprise. Mahdi lookedat him pointedly before rolling his eyes, nodding back to Jonas. Isakturned to him, his confusion palpable.

“We’recalling him Isaac, dude.”

Isakgaped at his best friend. “Wait, what?”

“Withtwo As though”, Jonas continued unbothered by Isak’s surprise.“Y'know, the English way. Just so there’s less confusion I guess.”

Isakremained frozen and when Jonas failed to get a response, he finallylooked over at Isak. “Isak?”

Noddingslowly, mouth hanging open in shock, Isak met his eye. “You- you’recalling him- you’re naming him after me?”

Magnuslaughed sharply. “This is getting too weird man!”

“ButI’m naming Jonah after you”, Isak continued uninterrupted.

Jonasshrugged. “And?”

“AndJonah is only inspired byJonas but you’re literally naming your son after me! I feel like ashitty friend now!”

DespiteIsak’s obvious distress, Jonas stared in shock. “Isak”, hedeadpanned. “Are you serious?”

Isaknodded rapidly.

Jonastried to refrain from rolling his eyes lest they fall into the backof his head. “Isak, there aren’t many names similar to yours thataren’t just Isak.”

Isakshook his head. “That’s a lie, there’s tons. Like…”

Silencesettled around them as Isak paused, and Jonas looked at him with aface that clearly said ‘I told you so’.

“Shutup”, Isak said, pointing a finger at him. “I’ll think ofsomething!”

“Itwont be a nice name”, Jonas promised, sinking further into hischair as he relaxed as though just to spite Isak, who was sitting onthe edge of his chair.

Mahdilaughed wholeheartedly. “Isak just give up now.”

Isakshook his head vehemently. “No, he can’t give the baby my name whenmy son only gets a similar name.”

“Thenjust name your son Jonas”, Magnus chirped up cheerfully.

Isakdidn’t even look his way as he spoke. “Even doesn’t like thatname”, he said, waving his hand dismissively.

“Hey!”

[skamfairy]

Isak and Sana’s friendship - throughout the years

The last one gets really really long because I couldn’t stop - I kinda have so many more of these so remind me to do a part 2 sometime <3 if you like of course :)

when Isak and Sana have to prepare for their final exams in third year, Even helps Isak plan a big study session at their apartment. 

there are colourful cushions all over the floor with books stacked in a pile. 

Even has freshly baked brownies placed in the centre, 

and calming music playing in the background. 

Isak claps his hands, raises one eye brow at Sana and exclaims “lets do this” 

they spend the afternoon quizzing each other, yelling at their text books and eating all the sugar Even throws at them before deciding they’ve had enough and going out for pizza

When they graduate, the two hug (something rare for both of them) 

but they struggle to let go, 

when they do Isak blinks his eyes 

and Sana laughs at him for crying 

I just got a fucking eyelash in my eye okay?!

mmhmm that’s it Isabel

but Isak doesn’t know that Sana is struggling not to cry either. Thank god she chose to wear waterproof mascara today. 

Even forces the two to get together as he takes over a million photos of them

Eveeeeeen I think you got enough

Isak are you crying?

fy faen

Turns out the bio dream team ended up both studying at the university of Oslo

Isak is studying med, Sana is studying politics, but still....

somehow they manage to compete and challenge each other for the better

I can’t do this Sana, I give up. Why did I even bother, I am an idiot. I should just drop out

oh okay I didn’t realise you were a coward

what

you too scared of work huh?

sana nei I-

wanna do something easy?

but I just

or do you want to work hard and accomplish your dream like the nerd I know you are?

well when you put it like that

okay give me your book, I bet I can answer more questions than you

Isak grins

your on Sanasol

When Isak asks Even to marry him (by hiding the ring in their bottle of kardammome and insisting Even makes him a kardamomme sandwich even tho it tastes like balls) Sana is the first person he calls after screaming with the boy squad for an hour

SANA I DID IT

You learnt to tie your shoe laces? well Isak that’s-

nei Sana he said YES

she pauses for a few seconds before whispering “you did it?” 

I DID IT

He said yes?

HE SAID YES

well of course he said yes, that boy looks at you like your god or something

that’s cos I am

okay stop 

she smiles on the other end, her heart growing five sizes at the thought of her two best friends deciding to spend the rest of their lives together

congratulations Isak, I am so happy for you...you- you deserve this. 

Isak is gonna cry

Sana?

yeah Isabel?

will you-okay don’t laugh but- will you be our maid of honour?

Sana is speechless

wh-why me?

are you kidding? Sana it all began with you...you and your 10%

her beautiful laugh chimes down the phone

your practically my fairy godmother

oh my gosh say that again and you’ll have to find another maid of honour

well Eskild is keen for the job actually

Sana laughs 

fine i’ll do it

you’ll do it?

i’ll be honoured Isak

When Isak and Even bring home a baby girl from the hospital, Sana stands back as boy squad, girl squad, and the kollektivet fight over holding the tiny human. 

Okay give her to uncle Mags!

Magnus you have literally just held her for 45 minutes, i get her for two seconds and you ask for her back? piss off, Eva says as she presses her face against the small little head

Language! not in front of the baby Noora says horrified,

Vilde grins i’m gonna make her the cutest little aerobics outfit

Is baby aerobics even a thing? Jonas asks as he grabs for the baby

nei back off! Eva says

your being a baby hog Eva 

Eskild shakes his head disapprovingly

now give her to her gurumother

we told you that is not a thing Isak laughs 

I like it Even grins causing Isak to whack him playfully

Mahdi finally manages to steal little evak from Eva and holds her up to his face

hello angel

oh great now we’ll never get her Jonas groans

Sana is standing in the back staring intently at the cute cartoon animals Even painted on the wall

are you going to hold her? Isak’s voice startles her 

um what - uh nah I- I held her before

no you didn’t

yeah um i did

Isak gives her his snake glare

you don’t like my baby?

what? nei I

what’s wrong with my baby Sana?

oh my god

my baby not good enough for her aunt Sana

okay look

hold my baby Sana

Isak- kids are just...I like kids

you like kids?

yes I just

don’t like my kid

fy faen she breathes

LANGUAGE Noora shouts

Isak laughs 

Even Linn held her, why won’t you

okay fine oh my god

She marches over to where Vilde and Eva are tickling the child which is gazing up with big blue eyes laughing at virtually nothing

give me the child she says

Vilde looks up are you sure

Sana rolls her eyes yes i’m sure

she picks up the baby awkwardly and stares at it

she doesn’t get the appeal

Hi baby she says the baby opens it’s mouth and drools

you don’t do much do you?

the baby crinkles it’s eyes in a smile the way Even does and grows red like Isak does when he is embarrassed (which is a lot)

suddenly Sana grows warm. she sits down with the little girl in her arms and smiles at her 

well your not too bad I guess

suddenly she hears a flash from across the room

she looks up to see Even grinning behind a camera

GOT IT he says proudly high fiving Isak

Sana rolls her eyes you two are the worse she says 

she shakes her head at the baby 

your dads are so lame

the baby hums in agreement

i feel bad for you 

the baby pouts

i do and look at those guys over there

she lifts the baby up to show her Mahdi and Magnus playing with a stuffed duck and a stuffed bunny

and then you have Vilde and Eva

she gestures to the girls who are giggling over the baby sock with their arms around each other 

the baby coos

don’t it’s not cute

the baby tilts it’s head in interest

it’s not

the baby isn’t convinced

anyway then you have Noora and Eskild

the babies eyes follow where Sana is pointing

nei Eskild this is plastic, the baby can’t have plastic

oh my gosh Noora you are such a fun sucker 

excuse me?

i’m the fun gurumother you’re gonna be the old hag she tricks into giving her money

You are going to poison her!

Sana rolls her eyes

a mess I tell ya

The baby looks over at Chris who is choreographing a dance routine to the nursery rhyme playing from the music box Noora gave the baby

Sana smiles, yeah okay she’s special, she says 

the baby nods 

Jonas and Linn are in the corner discussing capitalism 

the baby raises her nonexistent eyebrows 

yeah okay I was surprised about that development too

then she finally lets the little girl look at her parents who are laughing at Magnus and Mahdi and trying to tell Noora and Esklid to chillI 

hope you realise how lucky you are Sana says pulling the baby close

I mean they are all crazy, but stick with me kid and i’ll help you through

The baby smiles, she likes that idea

the boys walk over to Sana after a few minutes

hows aunt Sana doing? Even asks

we have an understanding

She loves you Isak smiles, he loves seeing two of his favourite girls together like this

Even picks up his daughter “Okay Lily Flower time for lunch”

Isak grins brightly at seeing his baby in his mans arms

everyone is grinning actually

especially Sana

[briennejamie]

I’ve decided to drown myself in Evak and the boy squad writing to make myself feel better and since SKAM is on hiatus so here’s a little plot that has been floating around in my head for the past couple of days :)... (also on AO3)

Title: Welcome Home

Summary:  After living in London for almost a decade, Even and Isak decide to move back to Norway together. While grocery shopping, Isak bumps into the boy squad for the first time in years, and little do they know that Even even exists let alone that he is just around the corner. One-shot.

“I used to know where everything was in this goddamn store…” Isak Valtersen’s frustrated mumbling rung in his own ears as he stood looking from shelf to shelf of the grocery store he was currently scouring. He used to know where everything in this store was so well, but having not been in Norway for so long he’s not that surprised. Places that used to be his, felt new and unfamiliar.

Isak backed up in the aisle, searching for the exact brand he needed, his eyes traveling quickly across each row before landing on the ever so clandestine item.

“Thank god,” he sighed in relief. He was pretty sure Even would laugh at him if he had to call him to come help. ‘It’s your town, baby’ he’d say he was sure. It was a good thing Isak loved him so much.

Isak placed the item into his cart and was about to continue on his shopping expedition when he heard his name being called from the other end of the aisle.

“Isak?” the voice sounded to be in disbelief, tone eager and mixed with excitement.

Isak turned his head to see Jonas. Jonas Noah Vasquez just standing there, a grin pulling at his face and eyes. That same hair, face, eyebrows, everything just the same, spare a few more mature features and light crows feet that were just beginning to form around his smiling eyes.

“Jonas!” The two practically ran into each other, embracing vigorously, patting each other on the back, their voices bubbling with laughter.

“I can’t believe it! You’re back?” Jonas still sounded like he couldn’t believe his eyes, but there was the underlying jubilance at the prospect of his best friend coming back to Norway.

Isak sighed out a laugh. “I’m back.”

They hugged again, and over Jonas’s shoulder Isak could see Magnus and Mahdi approaching their grins the same as Jonas’s.

“Isak, holy shit!”

“Bro, what the fuck!”

Their yells made Jonas and Isak pull apart again, allowing Isak to go and hug his other two friends.

“He’s back,” Jonas told them. Isak nodded, his heart beating, his breath heavier, adrenaline flooding his system from the happiness of seeing his friends again.

“I can’t fucking believe this you guys, I was going to call you tomorrow to tell you I was in Norway. What are the fucking odds,” Isak laughed.

“Fucking hell, bro. This is fucking awesome! The gang’s back together!” Magnus exclaimed.

"We were just shopping for this party that's going on at Jonas's soon, holy shit bro," Mahdi laughed before asking,  “How long has it been?”

Isak blinked rapidly, drawing the numbers in his head. “Seven years.” There was a pause.

“Shit,” Jonas breathed out. The boys hummed, nodding their heads.

Isak suddenly felt a wave of guilt rush over him. “Fuck, guys, I’m sorry.”

Jonas furrowed his eyebrows. “For what?”

“For not calling, for just fucking dropping off the face of the planet like that,” Isak confessed. It was something that he would think about often, if he should visit, call, text, anything. Life just got in the way every time, and sometimes he just didn’t call because it was easier. It was easier to not call then try and make plans with the friends he knew he would probably never actually see again, spare the visit to Norway once every year or two.

“Fuck that,” Jonas responded. “We know how hard it was. You moving to London for school was shitty enough, and when it came down to it everything that was happening just got in the way. We know you tried, fuck, we all tried.”

Isak had missed his best friend.

“Preach,” Mahdi commented, raising an invisible glass.

“Yeah…” Isak pieced the words together in his mind. “Once school started my life was so busy I barely had time to breath let alone try and keep up with everyone, I didn’t even call my parents most of the time. After meeting up the first few summers, once I was done with school and I got that job in London there was just no way I could keep living two lives like that, you know?"

The boys nodded, little “yeah”s floating in the air.

“Bro, we get it. We were all building our lives, and besides it wasn’t like you never called or texted. It was just a bunch of shit,” Magnus reasoned.

“Exactly.”

Isak grinned again, now that all the tension was gone. “So, what’s been going on? I need to know everything,” he exclaimed.

Jonas laughed. “Well, you know I got married.”

Isak smiled even brighter at hearing that, but then he remembered: Even was in the vegetable area of the store, and Isak was going to have to unload this great secret onto all of their heads.

“Yeah, man, I’m still pissed I missed the ceremony because of my job. How’s Mia?”

“She’s great, like really great. We bought a house a few months ago.”

“That’s awesome.”

“They’re so fucking in love dude, you should see it,” Magnus joked. Mahdi nodded in agreement and Isak was again reminded how much he missed all of them.

“Yeah well, even Magnus and Mahdi here have long term girlfriends so they can fuck off.” Magnus and Mahdi both shrugged, giving their “guilty as charged” looks.

“That’s great,” Isak said, his mind drifting to Even again.

“You dating anyone?” Magnus asked.

Isak had to take a breath in, and let it quickly and shakily vacate his lungs. “I’m married.”

Looks of shock and incredulity coated the faces of each one of his friends.

Jonas was able to collect himself first. “Are you serious?” He almost looked hurt that his friend hadn’t told him, but then again Jonas knew him too well for that.

“Yeah.” Isak held up his hand to show them the silver band that clung to his ring finger.

“Holy fuck,” Magnus exclaimed, hugging Isak again.

Once Magnus let go Mahdi and Jonas both gave their little looks of approval.

“It’s actually part of why I’m moving back here,” Isak began. “I’ve wanted to leave my job for a while now, and I got some job offers from different labs all over the place. One of them was here in Norway, and my…” he stuttered for the best word, “spouse is also from Norway so it just seemed perfect.”

“When are we gonna meet her?” Magnus questioned, his tone filled with excitement.

“Well…” Of course it was then Even decided to come find Isak, he always did have perfect timing.

“Hey, babe did you find the-” Even paused, raising his eyebrows at the scene in front of him. “Hi.”

“I did find it, thank you for all the help,” Isak joked, hoping to show Even that everything was okay. He seemed to understand the message because his face broke into his usual grin.

“Of course,” he responded.

Isak took a deep preparatory breath in. “Even, these are my friends from Nissen. Jonas, Magnus, and Mahdi. Guys, this is Even, my husband.” While ever since meeting Even in London, falling in love with him, marrying him, Isak had been comfortable with these ideas of “boyfriend” and “husband” and “gay” it felt like a grand moment to finally say those words to all the people who he was too afraid to tell before when he was still young and naive.

After a period of silence brought on by pure shock, Jonas, once again, broke the ice. “It’s great to meet you.” He leaned forward to shake Even’s hand, as did Mahdi. Magnus however was not nearly so graceful.

“Holy shit, your husband ? Your tall, fucking hot husband? Bro, you’re gay and you have a husband ? What the fuck,” Magnus’s word vomit never ceased to impress. Even laughed out of the sheer ridiculousness of it.

Isak rolled his eyes. “Yes, Magnus. I’m gay and this is my husband.”

Magnus nodded his head slowly, processing. “That’s fucking awesome dude. The diversity of our little group is getting better by the second.” Mahdi just had to smack him upside the head for that one, Magnus blurting a little “hva faen?”

Even laughed once more, pulling Isak to his side and pressing a kiss to his cheek. Isak rolled his eyes again, this time in the fond way that was reserved for Even.

“That’s right, we’re married,” Even gloated. “I managed to catch Isak Valtersen, I’m a legend for that, don't forget it.”

Isak couldn't help his smile. “Oh, my God Even. I can’t believe you.”

Even scoffed. “Yes, you can.”

Isak grumbled in the fondest way possible, looking at his husband, Even looking back at him, his mouth forming that little smile that he could never stop whenever he saw Even.

“I think we’ve found a couple worse that Jonas and Mia,” Mahdi joked with a touch of seriousness.

Jonas and Magnus laughed, before Jonas smiled brightly at his best friend, his hand clasping his shoulder and suddenly it was like he'd never left.

“Welcome home.”

[halsteadsass]

2, 4, 5, 7, 11, 14 and 16 :)

4. I’m assuming this is asking which couple is THE otp of all otp’s so my number one is noora and william.

5. Noora and Eva

7. Favorite episodes per season

season one, episode 11 - A really stupid choice (Eva choosing herself is by far the most important scene of season one and one of my favorites in the entire series. She truly found herself and was doing something for herself. EVA TOOK THE FIRST STEP IN HER DEVELOPMENT. DON’T DENY MY GIRL THIS.)

season two, episode three - Are you hiding something from us (The entirely of this episode was iconic. It was the game changer. It was when things finally opened up, started to fall into place, and make sense. Eskild and Eva partying for his fake birthday, the slo mo, Noora singing, William making Noora cocoa, maximum amount of noorhelm flirting, William falling in love, William reciting Noora’s insults from s1 like love poetry, Noora breaking her own bed rules, Noora getting caught lying about wanting to really stay with William..i can go on but i’ll chill.)

season three, episode nine - It will pass/Welcome to voicemail (Magnus reading Isak for filth in his ignorant comments about mental illness with his own experience with his mother to that beautiful church/Isak saving Even scene. That scene alone made me very emotional.)

season four, episode nine - Life smiles (I WAS SCREAMING THE WHOLE WAY THROUGH THIS EPISODE. IT KILLED ME DEAD TRULY. Not only did I get confirmation that noorhelm was going to be endgame, I got them in complete bliss, I got Noora coming full circle with the two people who started this journey with her [s2 window scene + understanding William talk], and Noora wearing a complete outfit straight out of William's closet. I got yousana. It was so beautiful it goes beyond words. Sana smiling like she’s never smiled before in her life, pure flirting, DO YOU TRUST ME/I TRUST YOU talk, yousef being scared of a swan[priceless] and a promise. A promise of one day. he’ll be coming back for his woman. And of course, that hug. THAT HUG.)

11. Season four was really hard to watch. I have never denied that the girl squad was always my favorite. I always preferred them over the boy squad. I had high expectations and what I got was completely the opposite of what I imagined. You’ve always seen these group of girls be together no matter. Stick out all the hard times together. So watching Sana feel isolated, that she didn’t belong, and making these choices that would cause a downfall in a way MADE ME FEEL A RANGE OF EMOTIONS. Happy, angry, joy, sad, petty - you name it. I felt it. The friendship between Sana and Noora was always a favorite so to see it sort of fall apart for a little while was heartbreaking. Noora is everything Sana isn’t. Its why her conflict with Noora was so important. Noora is the ideal Norwegian girl. She’s the smartest, prettiest, and friendliest in her eyes. Noora has flaws but no one really sees them unless you are close to her. Sana idolizes the life Noora has. but Sana is amazing in her own way. “please don’t let me be misunderstood” was the theme. IT TRULY STUCK TRUE TO THAT.   There was a lot I loved (sana being happy, understanding sana’s life, sana trying to educate and open her eyes to relationships with non practicing muslims, trying to understand why someone chooses not to believe anymore. los losers, all the happy girl squad moments, yousana, noorhelm, chriseva, other couples being domestic, elias being a god damn great brother, confirmations of certain truths) and a lot I hated (sana being left out, sana being left alone, sana being unhappy for most of the season, whatever that was with noora and yousef in the beginning of the season, sana’s mother TBH, yousef leaving, jonaseva, chrisemma). That’s just a short version. 

14. Noora chasing after William in the parking lot, isak saving even scene, and the scene where sana broke down and cried her eyes out.

16. FY FAEN

I answer number 2 here

[dutten-does-the-fanfic]

The Universe with Red Towels

Title: “The Universe with Red Towels” Word Count: 4.015 Warnings: Child abuse, language, blood, injuries

Pairing: Evak

Notes: Set back when Isak still lived in Kollektiv with Noora, Eskild and Linn (and Even)

Summary: The parallel universe where the curtains are the same colour, but the towels are stained with red because Isak’s mom isn’t all that nice

AO3

He sometimes wonders exactly how much Eskild knows.

He doesn’t quite remember it himself, too much alcohol on an empty stomach. All he remembers is flashing lights, pounding music and his stomach churning from drinking and the anxiety of actually not knowing what would happen to him now. Because he couldn’t go back. He just-

Couldn’t.

He doesn’t remember what he told Eskild, but it would’ve been bad enough for him to bring him back to his own place and actually let him sleep in his bed (if the circumstances had been different, Isak knows he would’ve never heard the end of being the reason why Eskild didn’t pull that night).

But then again. If Eskild did know to the full extent what was going on, he probably would’ve called the police.

Isak forgets how to hide things.

Not that he’s suddenly blurting out the secret, but. Not being covered in bruises everyday makes you forget how hard it actually used to be. He doesn’t have to time anything anymore – getting changed for gym, long sleeves and a jacket during the summer, a scarf that one time.

It wasn’t as if he had been covered in them from head to toe; it was usually just a sprinkle of colours a few places. Sometimes a bit more.

He doesn’t know if Jonas is just oblivious or if he just hasn’t said anything. He’s never said anything and neither has Isak. People don’t always know what to look for even though Isak feels like there’s a beam emitting from him and a too fast heart beat screaming “something is wrong at home it’s so much worse than what you know please just help-“

Isak had never had to worry about this whilst he was with Even. He hadn’t been home for months by the time they came back to Kollektivet, soaked to the bone, giggling like drunken fools. He had never had to go to the bathroom in order to change. He had never had to distract him from asking unwanted questions.

But.

It’s different. His mom and Even. There’s a difference between them, a big one, at that, and maybe Isak was unconsciously trying to tell Even what was going on that time in the locker room “I’ve decided that my life is better without mentally ill people around me” (stupid stupid stupid). If Isak counts that moment, Even is probably the only one he’s ever tried to tell.

But Even doesn’t know this. And Isak knows – or, he thinks Even knows there’s at least some differences between the two. He’s tried to explain. Even’s getting help. He’s dealing with it. He’s not letting his illness control his life. Isak’s mom refuses help and in the end, Isak could barely remember what his real mother was actually like. There were so few lucid moments left and he just couldn’t deal with it.

Even knows this, he thinks, but Isak can tell that it maybe bothers Even at least a little bit? Isak thinks it’s more of a deeply rooted fear that Isak will one day realize how much work Even is and he’ll run away (like he did with his mother).

And so, Isak decides, maybe it’ll be a good idea – healthy, even, maybe – to pay a visit to his mother.

He texts her, asking if he can come over after school this Thursday (it’s take a while to figure out which day would be best. He thought Friday, but Even is staying over this weekend (as if he doesn’t every weekend) and Isak knows he’ll probably spend at least half of it shirtless, and it would be too difficult trying to explain any marks if his mother is in a bad mood. Wednesday he’s hanging with the guys and they’ll be bugging him about it for the next year if he tries to say he has to go see his family, so Thursday it is).

Mamma replies with a bible quote, but it doesn’t involve any mutilations, murder, or any threats whatsoever, so Isak figures it probably means they’re on for Thursday. He’ll leave before dinner.

Thump. Bang. Clash.

Drip.

Drip.

Drip.

Even’s proud of me, Isak repeats to himself, ignoring the people in the tram glancing at him nervously. He’d probably be watching him too, were things different.

His shirt is soaked with blood from his nose, and the red is spreading, because he’s still holding the collar up and pressing down softly, head held back a bit. It’s not broken, his nose. He knows what that’s like. It’s just bruised this time.

There’s a woman with two kids who sits across the tram, openly staring at him. The little girl is wearing a red coat and is obviously looking at Isak’s now red t-shirt. The boy is asking his mom what’s wrong with Isak.

She doesn’t answer them. Her gaze is unwavering and Isak is starting to feel a bit uncomfortable. As if the truth is shining right out of his eyes giving everything away.

She leans forward a bit. “Do you need me to call someone for you?” She’s quiet, but he notices a few of the other passengers looking relieved at someone else taking responsibility and showing humanity so they don’t have to.

“Nei, takk. It’s fine, I’m okay,” Isak answers, trying to smile but ends up pulling a face more than anything.

She isn’t convinced. Her blue eyes don’t leave his. He’s thinks she knows. She must.

“Your parents, perhaps?”

His blood freezes. He doesn’t know why, she doesn’t even know his parents, wouldn’t be able to call them. “N-no, thank you,” he stutters and shrugs, wincing. “I’m nearly home anyway.”

She leans back against her seat, but she doesn’t look away from him. He tries to smile again. She smiles back.

He doesn’t remember when “home” became Kollektivet and not with Mamma and Papa. His stomach flutters at the thought.

He gets off at a stop earlier than he should and walks the way home.

Isak knows no one is supposed to be home tonight (Eskild is out, the girls are sleeping over at Eva’s, and Linn is visiting her parents). He fumbles with his keys and swears when he has to bend down to get them. His side hurts but it hurts more to rub it so he stops and just focuses on opening the door and turning on the light.

“SURPRISE!”

They all jump out – Even, Eskild, Jonas, Magnus, Mahdi – and Isak stands frozen in the door, staring at them in horror, them back at him.

Even’s the first to step towards him, taking three long strides and then he’s by his side.

“Hva faen - baby,” Even murmurs, gently pulling at the collar Isak is holding against his nose, “what happened?”

Isak can feel his mouth open and close, resembling a fish more than anything, but his thoughts are running wild and what the fuck they weren’t supposed to be here what the hell was he supposed to do-

“A teacup.”

Shit, he hadn’t actually meant to say that.

He can feel and see Even tense slightly, brows furrow in confusion. “Hva?”

Isak doesn’t know what to answer, so he just stares at Even’s jaw and throat. He wants to hug him. He wants a hug.

He doesn’t dare look at the other guys until he suddenly hears Jonas say “Fuck”, drawing it out like a sigh, as if he really wished he’d been wrong, and Isak once again wonders if Jonas knew.

Magnus is staring at Isak, a bit like he did when Even first walked up to them when they were watching the girls dancing. Mahdi is frozen, a beer can dangling dangerously from his hand. Eskild has sat down, head in his hands. Isak thinks he might be crying. Jonas is on the other side of the table, leaning back against the wall, looking a lot older than the last time Isak had seen him.

“A-and an elbow,” Isak finishes brokenly, daring to look Even in the eyes. He can’t read him, other than how scared and concerned he looks. “Maybe a couple of chairs. And a frying pan.”

Even keeps looking at him, and then something distracts him. His gaze moves from Isak’s eyes slightly to the right, his hand slowly moving towards the left side of Isak’s face.

Isak hisses when Even touches something, pain searing again when Even pulls something out.

It lays in the palm of his hand. A bloody shard of a porcelain teacup. Even drops it. It clangs against the floor. Isak flinches at the sound.

And suddenly everyone is moving. Even is pushing Isak into the bathroom, and they’re all following them.

“Towels, get me some towels.”

“Lean your head back, baby.”

“Is his nose broken?”

“What the fuck is-“

“Could someone find some fucking band-aids?”

“You’re alright, Isak, søte, look at me, alright, you’re okay.”

“Why the fuck did you go back?”

“I’m serious, is his nose broken?”

“Why is there so much blood?”

“Are you bleeding anywhere else?”

Isak doesn’t know what to say. He thinks he’s crying. Even is holding a damp towel to his nose, tipping his head back, speaking nonsense to him. The cut right by his eye hurts because his tears are running directly into it, but he doesn’t know how to tell them.

“Isak, baby, say something. You have to talk to me.”

“Is he going into shock?”

Even grabs a chunk of his hair, tugging gently, just sharp enough to pull him a little bit together, look Even in the eyes.

“There you are, baby, you went a bit far into that head of yours.” Even’s smiling at him. Isak tries to smile back, but a chunk of blood runs into his mouth and he gags at the taste.

He’s held over the sink, Even is still running his fingers through his hair, maybe holding it back a bit, but Isak doesn’t really have to throw up, doesn’t really want to, everything hurts to much, so he just shrinks back against Even, wanting to hide.

He doesn’t think about how he’s smearing blood on Even’s (his, Eskild’s) shirt, and either Even doesn’t mind or care, because he just pulls Isak in, as he would on a usual day, shushing him gently.

Eskild is trying to get a look at his nose, despite being squeamish around blood, and Isak appreciates him but he’s slightly panicky right now and ends up pushing Eskild back.

“It’s not broken, just – hit it wrong.”

“’Hit it wrong’” Jonas mocks, placing a plaster over the smaller cut by his eye. “Just got a teacup thrown at me, and what, maybe a chair or two, no big deal.”

Jonas isn’t angry with him, Isak knows that, but his breath is going staccato and his nails are digging into Even’s arms around him, maybe trying to get away, trying to run, he doesn’t know-

“Jonas, shut up,” Even says, voice strong despite the tears in his eyes Isak sees through the mirror.

Even starts to move the backwards, and Isak ends up banging his head up into Even’s chin, but Even doesn’t say anything, just sits down on the toilet seat and pulls Isak down with him, Isak’s head resting on his shoulder, the back of his head pressing into Even’s throat. “You’re okay, baby, there you go, you’re with me.”

No one is saying anything but Even. Isak can see drops of blood on Even’s shirt, his nose is still dripping a bit, albeit slower. He can’t bear to look at it, but he doesn’t seem to be able to shut his eyes. Even’s rocking back and forth, as if sitting with a baby.

It takes a while before Isak feels calm. “That’s it, baby, skatt, så, du er okay,” Even says, knowing exactly when all the tension has left Isak.

Magnus is standing in the doorway, not able to take his eyes off of Isak. Mahdi is looking at the wall behind them, not able to look just yet. Jonas is hunched over the sink, gripping the edge, knuckles white, his breaths sounding harsh in the quiet.

Eskild is standing by the shower before he hunches down, hand gripping Isak’s. Isak lets him.

“Why did you never say anything?” Eskild asks. He looks troubled. Isak probably would’ve too. He can’t bear to look him in the eyes. “All that time, why didn’t you-“

He trails off. Words don’t come easy to anyone of them right now.

“I could’ve helped you.”

That makes Isak look at him. Really look at him. In front of him is nothing but a boy, a scared boy, who has had to take on too much responsibility when it comes to Isak. He’s only four years older. Four years.

“But you did.”

Eskild snorts. Isak can’t bear to sit up so he grabs Eskild’s wrist instead.

“You did. You got me out.” Isak’s never really thought about it in detail, hasn’t been able to. But if he had never met Eskild, he probably – he can’t even imagine what could’ve happened to him. Would’ve happened.

Eskild snorts again, or tries to. The lump in his throat is too big. “I gave you the fucking basement-”

Isak gently kicks Eskild’s knee, grabbing his attention. “You gave me a home.”

Eskild sobs, Even tightens his arms, and Jonas bangs his hands against the sink, not able to keep his anger in check anymore. Isak flinches at the noise, tries to mask it afterwards but fools nobody.

Isak’s reminded of how much his lower back hurts, but he doesn’t say anything, too fixated on Jonas. Trying to predict his next move.

He doesn’t expect him to cry.

“Why the fuck did you go back?” Jonas asks, voice surprisingly calm.

Isak winces at that. He can’t tell them. Even would crumble, break apart, if he ever knew he went because Isak wanted to prove that Even’s disorder wouldn’t break them apart. So he doesn’t answer.

He can feel Even’s tears on his neck. Maybe he does know.

No one says anything for a while. Harsh breathing resonates. Magnus keeps asking Isak if he wants anything. Isak doesn’t answer.

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

Even’s head is resting against the wall behind the toilet. Isak can see it in the mirror. Doesn’t dare look at himself yet.

“I told you you wouldn’t want to know everything I’ve gotten away with,” Isak jokes, trying to lighten to mood.

Except Even’s crying. Even’s fucking crying, Isak made him cry and he hates himself for it, curls up a bit more, and Even hides his face against Isak’s neck.

“Jesus,” Mahdi mutters, hand rubbing against his face.

“Jesus,” Isak repeats, shutting his eyes. He can feel Even shaking.

Jonas looks at them through the mirror, gaze unwavering. Isak looks away, can’t take it.

“Alright,” Jonas finally says, clearing his throat when barely anything come out. “Alright, I’ve taken care of you so far, I’m gonna be grown up now as well. Where else?”

Isak feels Even tense at the prospect of him being more hurt and Isak can’t deal so he doesn’t answer. Looks at the showerhead instead, counts the small dots. 30, 31, 32-

“Isak,” Jonas repeats, finally turning around. “Where else? You mentioned chairs, so where else?”

Isak’s hands are shaking and he doesn’t know what to. Especially not when Even starts to stand up.

“No,” Isak says, or, he tries to, he’s making noises but he doesn’t know if they make sense. He’s grabbing onto Even’s hoodie. He can’t leave him, he can’t, he can’t-

“It’s okay,” Even says, one hand furiously rubbing away at his eyes. He gently pries Isak’s hands from his shirt, holding them with his own instead.

“Don’t-“

“We’re just going to take your shirt off, okay?” Even says, looking at Jonas for help, who moves closer to them. “Nothing I haven’t done before, right?”

Even tries to smile, tries to joke, tries to do a lot of things and Isak wants to cry. He thinks he is.

“Come on, baby, work with me. One arm at a time, okay? We can do this.”

It hurts taking off his hoodie. He has to bend his arms backwards and all his muscles are hurting and the bruise stretching from his lower back to his side is hurting. Magnus has to take over for Even and help Jonas get his clothes off of him because Isak won’t let go of Even’s hands.

Even is trying to distract him. “I always knew you were too pretty. Look at all those boys trying to get your clothes off, baby.”

Isak lets out a sob involuntarily. Even looks like he wants to cry as well.

“No, don’t, just please, don’t,” Isak mumbles, trying to squirm out of their hands. Even kisses his cheek, trying to get him to relax.

“It’s okay,” Mahdi mutters, gently lifting the edge of Isak’s shirt. “We just need to have a look.”

Isak presses his face against Even’s neck. Eskild has to help Even tug his head back so they can get the shirt over his head.

Isak hears someone swear, but he doesn’t pay attention to it. He can see the bruise in the mirror. It’s not a proper bruise, yet, still too early, but it’s clear where the chair had hit, and it’s clearly going to be very ugly before the night is over.

“Anywhere else?”

Isak shakes his head.

“Are you sure?” Jonas presses. “Maybe somewhere you don’t want us to see?”

Isak’s face goes a bit crimson at that. “Fuck’s sake, no.”

Jonas is pointedly keeping quiet. Isak can feel his eyes boring into the back of his neck.

Isak sighs, his head falling forward onto Even’s collarbone. Even puts his arms around his shoulders, lightly, as if he’s afraid to touch.

“Thigh,” Isak mutters, not looking up. “It doesn’t hurt, though.”

He can feel Jonas raising his eyebrow. “It doesn’t,” he insists.

“Let’s just, have a look,” Mahdi says, and suddenly there are hands on the button of his jeans and on his sipper and people are trying to push them down and Isak thinks he’s panicking again.

“It’s nothing,” he squirms, pushing himself against Even, trying to force the prying hands away. “It really isn’t. She barely hit it, I don’t think it’s more than a small bruise, just stop, please.”

He thinks the small ‘please’ is what makes Even insist on stopping the boys.

“We’ll do it later, okay?” Even compromises.

Isak wants to huff in disagreement, but he can’t find the energy to. He just slumps down in Even’s hold and folds his arms around his waist.

“But-“ Magnus begins. Isak thinks Even looks at him warningly.

“If he says it’s nothing, it is nothing. I trust him.”

Isak eyes feel wet with how much he loves Even. He wants to tighten his arms around him further, but knows it’ll hurt, so he instead presses his lips against Even’s neck, just holding them there. He thinks Even understands.

Jonas huffs. “Yeah, because he’s never lied about anything else.”

It feels like a slap to the face and Isak physically flinches, hot shame burning through his body, coloring his cheeks red. He feels wrong, his stomach is churning, he wants to press closer to Even, but doesn’t know if Even would even want him to, because they’re right, he’s a liar, he’s always been, he-

Even shakes his head. “Doesn’t matter. He’s here right now. He’ll say if he wants anything or needs help.”

Someone is running their fingers through Isak’s hair. He thinks it Eskild.

Isak feels warm from realizing how many people care, like, properly care, about him, how worried they are about him. Suddenly, he wants nothing more than to prove Even right.

He pulls his face back and look at Even. “Can we,” he start out, having to swallow because his mouth is so dry. His voice is shaking slightly. “Can we, maybe, uh, go lay down?”

He hates how his voice is shaking, and he still hasn’t made his mind up whether or not speaking was a good idea after all, but then Even’s smiling as if the best thing in the world just happened (although it looks sad around the edges and Isak could kick himself, really).

“Of course,” Even answers. “Or do you think sitting is a better idea?”

Isak didn’t really expect such a mundane answer. He’s not really sure what he expected though, and he doesn’t know how to choose, but Even looks so proud of him right now, and Isak wants to continue feeling at least a little bit happy.

“Maybe,” he has to pause, breathing hurts. “Maybe sitting, would be best.”

Even nods and that’s that.

They’re all moving slowly to the living room. Maybe his leg hurts a bit after all. He’s not ready to tell them that, though. Not after making a fuss about it in the bathroom.

Even sits down on the couch, but stops Isak from doing the same, instead having him stand in front of him.

“Maybe we should have a look at that leg after all,” Even suggest, looking up at Isak questioningly, even though he hadn’t phrased it as a question. Isak realizes he’s trying to give Isak a choice and show him he trusts him. Trusts him to tell Even when he’s hurting, even though Even already knows.

Isak nods slowly. “Okay.”

He can hear Jonas and maybe someone else, Mahdi, maybe, sigh, because him agreeing means it wasn’t nothing after all.

Even’s unbuttoning his pants, slowly pulling them down, trying to have the fabric scratch as little as possible against his legs. His eyes linger on the visible bruise and Isak has to look at the wall behind Even.

He knows when they see the bruise on his thigh, but they don’t react as badly as they did with his stomach.

No one says anything really, but then Even’s sighing and gently pulling him down into his lap.

“There we go,” Even says as they settle down, Even sitting, leaning against the armrest, Isak resting against his chest, pressing his nose into Even’s neck. “Do you need anything?”

Isak doesn’t really know. Can’t really think of anything, and ends up shaking his head.

“Maybe your duvet?”

Isak nods. That’s a good idea, maybe. He isn’t wearing anything but his underwear and February isn’t exactly warm.

He doesn’t know who brings them the duvet, but suddenly it’s lain over him and Even is fussing about it covering him completely.

The other guys are sitting down around them. Isak doesn’t look at any of them.

It’s quiet. It’s almost unbearable. It’s never felt like this before. This awkward. Not even when Isak was still in the closet or when he had shoved Mahdi.

“I can hear all of you thinking,” he tries to joke, but no one smiles. Maybe Even, but Isak can’t see his face. “Just get it over with,” he sighs, but Even shakes his head, immediately stopping anyone from talking.

“We don’t have to do that now,” Even says. Isak thinks Jonas is trying to protest, but Even doesn’t let him. “We’re going to be completely chill about this, and do what we always do.”

Isak isn’t sure what they always do. They haven’t really tried this before.

“And what it that? What’s our rule?” Even asks, squeezing Isak’s shoulder.

“Take it minute by minute.”

Even nods approvingly, muttering a praise.

“And what are we going to do this minute?” Isak feels odd about this, the roles reversed between them, but Even’s putting him at ease. It almost feels nostalgic. And maybe a bit hopeful. They got through it then, they’ll get through it now.

Isak thinks the boys understand this.

“This minute,” Even says, pressing his face into Isak’s curls, “we’re going to sit here, and breathe. Just breathe.”

“That’s chill,” Isak mutters, exaggerating his next breath.

Even chuckles and presses a kiss to his head. “That’s chill.”