#why am i even overthinking this. it was 8 questions

[fisheito]

OH HO!

also assigned anxiety at nu🦀

[mysteriousbp]

While I was working on a ask I started thinking about a note in the Steamworks that always confused me...

This note:

I always found this note weird because it sounds like Chujin is questioning himself about how he's going to tell Ceroba and Kanako that he got fired...

But why is the note in Richter's office?

I then realized something... This wasn't always Richter's office... This was Chujin's office before he was fired and replaced by Richter.

Then that would mean that Chujin was the one in charge of this division since the office is separated from the others and has the files of every employee.

Which is kind of weird for Chujin, but that would explain why he got so many changes with Asgore to prove Axis. Because I don't think a simple engineer would have been given so many changes by the Steamwork higher-ups.

But that thought made me think of Axis for a bit… I then started to question something that always bothers me… How is Axis model 14 if model 8 was the last model shown to Asgore? It's implied that the accident with Asgore and Axis was the reason why Chujin was fired… But how did Axis get from model 8 to 14 if Chujin was fired?

Some people say that Chujin finished Axis outside of the Steamworks and that he was put there by Chujin after the Steamworks closed...

But that doesn't make any sense… Why would the database know that Axis is in model 14 if the last known model was 8? Why would Chujin finish Axis and just put him in the Steamworks to guard it if he was fired from there?

Then I realized something... Chujin wasn't the one to finish Axis... It was the Steamwork engineers...

And there is some evidence for this…

In the tape were Chujin says he was fired he says this:

After he got fired, he tried to find another way to save monsterkind that wasn't Axis… That means he didn't work on Axis after he got fired...

And that would make sense. The robots made in the Steamworks are Steamworks property. So they could do whatever they wanted with Axis after Chujin was fired.

So rather than scrap him, they decided to try to make Axis a robot that could actually work properly...

That would also explain another thing… Axis mentions other guard robots when Clover and Ceroba first meet him.

Why would the Steamworks build more guard robots like Guardener after the failure that was Axis? After all, only Chujin had the idea for guard robots.

Actually, Prof. Z (the monster that wrote the letter above), who is implied to be a higher-up, wasn't even sure of the idea of guard robots in the first place. So why build guard robots after Axis failed?

Because the Steamwork engineers were able to prove that Axis could work. Proving that guard robots could actually be reliable. So they started making more guard robots like Guardener. And made Axis a guard robot in a area of the Steamworks

After all… Asgore didn't say that guard robots were a bad idea… He just said that the freedom belonged in more capable hands…

If this is true… Then Chujin wasn't able to see Axis at his full potential… Because Axis was only able to reach that potential without Chujin…

A part of me doesn't want this to be true... But another part wants this idea to be true because it makes Axis's backstory more complex... And Chujin's more sad...

I am overthinking this... Or is this something that could have happened? I would like to hear opinions on this idea.

[justwonder113]

Head over heels - Lee Know pt2

First part here (Can be read as a standalone)

Warning: Cursing(I can't help it). mentions of drinking. The reader is overthinking in the beginning but the end is fluffy. Minho is a menace and I love him for it. I can't think of anything else please tell me if I missed anything. Reader is gender neutral.

Word count - 1.4k

Masterlist

A/N- Hey lovelies, I'm back with the continuation of the previous Minho drabble. I wasn't thinking of writing the second part but I got inspired so here we are. I really hope you'll like it. Comments and reblogs are greatly appreciated. I'd love to hear what you guys think. Thank you for all the love and support you give me, it really means so much to me. Please take care of yourselves, love you all so much!! <3 <3

The one and only sun, the sourse of light and basically all life on earth was sometimes a huge dick. Like what do you mean you're brutally waking someone up from their sweet slumber on 8 am on sunday? That's just evil. Do you know what they were up to all night? Maybe they need their much needed rest. Talk about inconsiderate.

Grumbling curses at the bright rays of sunshine which felt like you were being poked in your eyeballs you turned to your side, trying to escape them. You furrowed your face into your pillow hoping to fall back asleep. But you couldn't. Because you realized couple of things. First of all your so called pillow was clearly breathing. Second of all the familiar comforting smell clearly belonged to your best friend. Third, how the fuck was Minho's chest so firm yet so soft?

Hold on, hold on. Why were you sharing a bed with Minho? Normally whenever he slept over he opted for using the guest bedroom or the couch if he was too lazy to get up. It was rare of you to share a bed. Wait did you do something?

You tried to recall the events of the last night. You were at the club. Minho got a bit drunk, you went to get him some water. Some deuchbag tried to hit on you but Minho scared him off. You got to your apartment. You asked him to help with detangling your Chains and you two made out for hours, you talked in between and some time into talking about some random stuff Minho fell asleep.

You made out wit your best friend! What were you thinking?! You're clearly into him, you have been for a while, but what about him? Okay you knew Minho wouldn't just kiss you out of nowhere but still! You have been extra flirty lately but he hasn't given you a hint or a clue that he romantically likes you like that. Maybe it was just a spur of moment thing. Let's say he wanted to test things out. Maybe he wanted to test if he liked you like that? Oh god, what if he regreted it? What if you ruined everything. Oh God, what if this messed up your friendship. You couldn't live without him in your life. Maybe it was an overdramtic announcement but he was too dear for you. He was the reason you believed in suolmated be it platonic or romantic. God you shouldn't have indulged in kissing him when you knew he was still a bit tipsy. But he was so close tho and his lips looked so pretty and kissable... Oh what the hell?

The hands tightening around you stopped your train of thoughts. Great you woke him up now. You were mad at the damn sun for waking you up and now you were the one to wake him up? Great job.

Minho's groggy yet soft morning voice startled you. "I can physically feel you overthinking. It's too early, go to sleep."

"But Minho." You cringed at yourself at how whiny your voice sounded. Minho opened his eyes to give you an unimpressed look. He wrapped his hands more tightly and brought you even closer. You both loved and hated how at peace you felt whenever you were around him. Being between his harm made every cell in your body relax, except your heart, which felt like it would burst any second. When did you even manage to fall so hard for him?

"Do you like me?" The suddenness of his question startled you. You couldn't with him sometimes.

Unimpressed with the lack of answer Minho opened his eyes and full on glared at you. Normally you would laugh it off or try to make him well not upset but now all you could think about was how could a human look so breathtaking first thing in the morning. With messy hair and slightly dark circles from the few hours of sleep he got. He was like a walking renaissance painting what the hell? Minho was about to let go of you when you started talking. Well you had to say something.

"It pisses me off how pretty you look first thing in the morning."

You blinked at you once, then twice then rolled his eyes. His hand came up to your cheek and you thought that maybe it was one of those rare moments when he was sweet and affectionate, but no, you were proven wrong when he slightly pulled on the skin of your cheek.

"First of all, I'm always pretty. Second of all I could say the same to you." He let go of your skin and now slightly grazed your soft skin. "Third of all you're getting distracted sweetheart." This smooth fucker. You could feel your face start to heat up.

"You have never called me sweetheart."

"Hm, do you not like it?" Minho mused and looked at you with eyes full of mischief. The fucker knew he was getting you all flustered up.

"I didn't say I didn't like it."

"You're cute." Why was he so keen on teasing you today?

"Shut up!" - You couldn't help but groan. You didn't fully appreciate how flustered he made you feel.

The smirk on his face grew even wider if that was possible."Make me!"

If he thought that you wouldn't retaliate! You looked at him with challenging eyes. "I just might!"

"So you do like me." He said so casually while playing with strand of your hair you were taken aback for a second. God you hated how your heart basically did a backflip at his soft voice.

"You're infurating." You wanted to hide your face now, you knew this little asshole was having the time of his life watching you get this flustered.

"And you're not denying." Why would you? He knew you liked him.

"One fact doesn't exclude the other smartass!"

"So you're admitting it." How was he so casual about it?

"Maybe I am. What are you going to do about it?" You challenged him. Proud of yourself when you saw that your comment got to him and suprised him for a second.

"Then, I am going to kiss you senseless like you're pretty butt deserves to. And I'm going to take you some place fancy for our first date." To make his point across he even took your hand and softly kissed it.

"Aww you think my butt is pretty." This was the only response you could muster up. At this point you were amazed how was your heart still working.

"Well of course I think my partner's butt is pretty." Did he just say what you thought he did?

"Partner?" You couldn't hide your surprise as well as your hopefulness.

"Bold of you to assume You have any way out of this relationship." What a romantic. Why was he so him?

You decided to tease him a little, after all that's all he did all morning. "What if I'm tired of you?"

"You can always sit the fuck down." Again, so romantic.

"What if there's no chair?" Based on the smirk on Minho's face you knew he was going to make it dirty. "Okay never mind, I got it. Okay, what if we lose chemistry?"

"I have seen breaking bad, we will cook something up."

"Okay you're clearly quoting that one tiktok I sent you."

Minho glared at you for a second. "Doesn't mean I'm not being genuine."

"What if your cats hate me?" Minho rolled his eyes at you.

"They love you and you know it."

"Yeah, I'm way too adorable for them to not love me. Okay what if..." Minho didn't let you finish.

"No what if's. I love you and it's clear you feel the same. I knew what I was doing when I kissed you last night and I know what I'm doing right now. You're mine and I'm going to treat you like a royalty until you let me. Don't overthink your pretty mind now. Let's just cuddle for a while and then I will take you out for the fanciest breakfast ever." Again not really romantic but the butterflies in your stomach still decided to have a French revolution in your tummy.

"I still hate you"

"Whatever you say sunshine." He leaned in and sealed his lips with yours.

[anonzentimes]

zen am i just projecting or am i cooking when i say komahina are both soooo incredibly anxiety disorder coded

like i’ll start with nagito bc to me that one’s more obvious. this guy has ocd. holy SHIT nagito has ocd. and it’s completely reasonable for him to have developed it! his luck means that things go wrong for very little reason all the time, he knows the luck has Rules to it, of course he’d develop little “rituals” (read: compulsions) to try to minimize bad luck. plus, frontotemporal dementia often causes symptoms of ocd as well (though i’d argue he very well could have developed the disorder before his diagnosis). nagito is always so convinced that Something Bad is going to happen Because Of Him even if he has nothing to do with the situation. “xyz thing happened earlier so something awful will happen now” that is obsessive-compulsive thinking!!! i just know he counts every step and Has to close doors 8 Times ���just in case.” he probably has some form of moral ocd as well considering how convinced he is that he’s a terrible person who isn’t worth anything. oh and of course he doomspirals like no fucking other

as for hajime. i might really be projecting with this one but also i’m Right. generalized anxiety disorder. his primary fear response is fight. hajime is so stressed out about everything all the time and this is why he’s kind of bitchy. he’s Anxious. you see this a lot in the prologue where even before monokuma shows up hajime Is Not Trusting Of This Situation bc what the fuck!!! where is he!! what do you MEAN just enjoy it how did he get here!!! he’s surrounded by strange people on a strange island with a fucking stuffed rabbit and you expect him to NOT freak out??? hello??? he passed out for sure bc his adrenaline response got so intense that his blood pressure got weird and oh down he goes. but it also shows in subtler ways. his thought patterns and constant questioning of things— he overthinks a LOT, from monokuma’s plans to why his classmates are Like That to I Must Be So Normal to his mystery talent to What Is Nagito’s Deal Actually. in the prologue and chapter one, nagito gets hajime to calm down by distracting him— specifically, he teases hajime and riles him up. this gives him a healthy outlet to put that fight response energy into, and thus the anxiety recedes. hajime calls himself a “coward” in nagito’s 5th (? maybe 4th) fte— before i got my gad diagnosis, i thought of myself as being overly sensitive and nervous— hajime, who isn’t very good at deciphering emotions in general (likely due to not being able to talk about them at home but that’s a different story), would probably see his anxiety and identify it as cowardice. he also just… worries. constantly. about everything. whenever a classmate goes missing, whenever nagito goes missing (he proceeds to question WHY he’s worrying with nagito a lot which ties back to the overthinking), whenever anything new happens on the island, etc. mainly though i think hajime’s gad shows in his insecurities. he is deeply afraid of mediocrity, of his best not being enough. i think a lot of his fears stem from the idea of being forgettable or unremarkable— he wants to make an impact on the world, and the thought of dying before he can, whether it be in the killing game or just the rat race of life, horrifies him. but he doesn’t know who he is, he doesn’t know how to make that impact. he’s terrified that he, hajime hinata, is not enough. that he’s boring, unremarkable, destined to be just another salaryman, part of the mob. that’s why he worries about his talent so much, that’s why it hurts so much when nagito starts treating him worse in chapter 4 (someone who was once his biggest source of comfort is now affirming his worst fears), and that’s why he was such a good target for the kamukura project. hpa saw his insecurity and fear and preyed on it. most people wouldn’t sacrifice themselves for some experimental project. but when you��ve fought to get to a place that you pray will be able to make you special, and they tell you “we can make you special, but it will change who you are,” and you Don’t Like who you are because you feel deep down that who you are will never be enough, well. why wouldn’t you take the offer? you get to Be Something. you get to make an impact. who cares if you lose yourself? that guy was boring.

ANYWAYS that got away from me a little bit. i could keep going (like abt hajime’s fight response and nagito’s fawn response) but this ask is long enough lmao. point it they both have undiagnosed anxiety disorders i know it i Know It please tell me you see what i see

Hii!!! Sorry it’s taken me so long to get around to answering this! I was waiting for a good moment to type up a response since I think such a long ask, especially from an oomf, deserves a thought out reply. To be straightforward and simple: yes, absolutely yes! I think the interpretations that Hajime has anxiety disorder and Nagito has ocd is very fitting. I don’t know as much about ocd as I do about anxiety, so I don’t really talk about it in fear that I may be rude or inaccurate, but I definitely so heavily agree every time I see it. As for the anxiety disorder I’m not sure if I really have it but my anxiety is a pain and I am taking supplements and have started taking meds for it recently (fingers crossed those actually do anything helpful), but this is to say that I relate to Hajime a lot in those sort of moments and when you phrase it like that I realize it is probably because of the anxiety he experiences alongside his character beats. For Nagito I can say, “Yeah! Everybody makes such great points about him having Ocd! I really like that interpretation even if I don’t know about it as much,” and then with Hajime it’s like “Yes! This is canon to me I know about this and I say so and relate to him and it fits incredibly well!” :D

also lowkey I’ve been having that weird feeling where I miss them,,, and reading this has made me miss them less so thank you very much hehe I love Hajime and Nagito very much and agree with your points heavily, appreciate you sending this!

[whentheleahvesfall]

It’s difficult to know for certain now what I want to do with my life. I know a lot of the time I do ramble a lot both irl and I guess online, but a lot of the time I feel lost and without purpose without feeling I have a good place in the world. Whilst I know I’ve been wanting to get back into doing art and writing, I guess finishing uni has made me think a lot about the ups and downs of my life and how far I’ve gotten to the place I am now. I dunno… I feel lost? Scared? A mixture of it all? I haven’t the slightest clue at the moment.

I don’t know how many of you guys who read my posts a lot of the time know about this, but I’ve got Autism. I’ve had it since I’ve been about 8 years old, and for the last 13-14 years of my life knowing I’ve had this as something affecting me, it’s made me question a lot about the stuff I’m good at.

Am I good at being a writer, an artist, a student or even just a person?

What do I offer that I feel is a strength for myself?

Do I even consider myself a person who deserves to be loved, despite fearing he always constantly upsets people?

And… I guess that’s how I’ve been really feeling. A lot of the time, I don’t know whether anything I’m doing is something to be considered “good”. Do I belong here? Do I keep making mistakes so much that people don’t want to be around me?

Maybe I overthink things a lot and that’s what these thought patterns are. Yet when you’re a guy who has mostly dealt with things on his own for most of his life, I uh… I don’t know how to really be me in a stream full of people.

I guess maybe I’m not someone who can answer these questions I have about myself. But despite that, I worry a lot of the time. An awful lot. And even still, underneath it all… I feel like I’d like to try and be who I am for what I am, but my brain and the way my life’s been up until now makes me question if I do have a place in this world for people to even appreciate just myself.

For what it’s worth, thank you for everyone who has liked the dumb stuff I’ve done since I first joined Tumblr or who know me from elsewhere. I don’t know why people enjoy it for what it is as I don’t consider myself good by any means, but it does make me smile knowing there are at least a few of you who do like me for me.

I’m just thinking about I suppose what’s next for me. Do I continue to just try and participate in the communities I’m in? Or fade away and hope people forget about me so I move on with just perhaps living a normal life?

I… I’m not honestly sure. I wish I knew how to be positive for myself and to keep moving forward, but without much of a goal, what do I really hope to accomplish for myself? Do I make any of you guys happy? It’s okay if I don’t too, but I feel maybe I need to reflect better on myself, but I don’t know how.

I don’t usually ramble a lot on my blog, and for good reason as I don’t know how many of you genuinely care about the guy behind the scuffed shit and I guess see me for… I don’t know, the dumb nerd with a like for Mudkips?

I may be mistaken, but as this point I really can’t say for sure. Maybe these feelings of mine will subside, but as they are not going away right now, I guess I’ll throw them here and see what happens.

If you got to the end, then thanks. I’m sorry for making this feel overly negative about me, but I suppose sometimes when you really just want to find a way to vent… you gotta do it in the way that helps you to feel better. Sorry again.

I don’t know how much of this is my Autism, but… hopefully one day I’ll get over these doubts. Probably just not right now.

[my-1heart]

Too much to ask…

my-1heart Valentine’s Special (1)

Vil Schoenheit x GN Reader

Notes: small fear of rejection, little bit of overthinking, Vil teases the reader just a bit (not negatively), already dating (pre-established relationship??)

Valentine’s Day was quickly approaching and well… you hadn’t asked Vil yet.

First and foremost, you didn’t know how to ask. The task felt much too big for you alone.

Second, if the actor does say yes, what do you get a celebrity that has it all?

You couldn’t just get Vil some cheap chocolate and flowers.. he probably received that all the time. And with your undeniably low funds from… well everything, affording that might be a little hard as well.

“Why is this so hard?? I’m literally dating him.” You grumbled, slumping on the bed.

You had initially thought this would be easy, seeing as how you managed to court and ask out the famous man. So why is it that asking Vil to be your Valentine made you so nervous? And of what exactly? Rejection??

“My, my, what’s gotten you all worked up?” A sudden voice spoke up.

Matching the voice with its body had been easy. A delicate tone was almost always use when he spoke to you after all. Teasing yet delicate.

Looking up, you were greeted by Vil, who had just returned from whatever it was that he needed to do.

Sure he told you what he was doing, but your mind was still too wrapped up in your current dilemma so all you had actually registered was the fact that he’d be back in a little bit.

Vil gently sat down on the bed, looking at you with a smile.

“Let me guess. Seeing how it’s February and we are only a few short moments away from Valentine’s Day… you still have no idea how to ask.” He spoke, smiling when you shot a small glare his way.

“You are just… Yeah that’s about right.” You mumbled, looking away from him.

“Well, I hope you know that I’ll accept if you ask.” He announced, letting you know he was in fact waiting for the question.

You looked at him, flushed. Of course he knew and of course he was waiting. For it would’ve been far too easy had he asked and Vil didn’t exactly prefer easy.

He laughed a little at your flustered state. You could only shoot him a small glare before you averted your view from his.

“While I’d love it if you asked, don’t feel pressured to. I still love you even if you don’t ask me to be your special someone for this silly holiday. We can enjoy chocolate and such everyday, so please don’t worry too much.” He spoke, gently patting your back.

You slowly turned back to look at him. A slight pout adorned your face.

“What’s with the pout?” He asked, reaching over to lightly pinch your cheek.

“Why would I put asking aside when I know you’ll say yes if I ask? That’s stupid.” You pouted.

Vil let out an amused hum as you were left to ponder on how you’d ask.

“Well, if you still plan to ask, just don’t let it consume you.” He said, before standing up and going over to his vanity.

Perhaps you were really overthinking this. After all, what’s better than spending money on cheap items? Homemade ones! Perhaps your efforts would not go to shambles after all!

You could ask Trey for help on the chocolates and totally just go borrow some stuff from the art room… wait does this school even have an art room?? Never mind that… your sure your score a good catch at Sam’s shop.

You stood up and bid Vil a goodbye before quickly exiting to began your new ideas with a copious amount of confidence.

February 8, 2023 7:13 AM

[wrenreid]

Off Limits

content warnings: legal alcohol consumption, mentions of a gun (hotch’s)

Part Twelve

Telling me not to wear a tie was not too specific. What do I wear? I’ve never been to a party, and I don’t want to look stupid. I already won’t belong there, I don’t particularly want to stand out.

I decide on a lightweight sweater, black jeans, and my beaten up converse. I can feel the nerves course through me as I finish getting ready.

It’s 8:30. It’ll take 10 minutes to get to Hotch’s apartment, and Im already ready. If I sit here and wait to leave at a reasonable minute, I’ll overthink I’ll back out. And I don’t want to back out because Jade will be disappointed. I don’t want to disappoint her.

Thus, I knock on the apartment door 18 minutes too early. Jade opens it, dressed in a t shirt and shorts I don’t think quite qualify as shorts.

“I’m early,” I apologize.

“No worries, come in,” she smiles softly. I oblige. “You can keep me company while I finish getting ready.”

I follow her upstairs where she tells me to sit. I sit on the edge of her bed, staring at my folded hands in my lap.

“Do I look okay? I feel like I look dorky,” I ask, looking up at her as she does something to her face in the mirror.

She turns around, her eyes now lined with black ink. The black eyeliner makes the brown in her eyes pop even more.

“You always look dorky,” she says after examining me.

My eyebrows furrow, and I frown.

“In a good way,” she clarifies. “Why the pumpkin sweater? It’s April.”

“It’s never too early for Halloween, Jade,” I inform her. My words make her chuckle. I smile at the sound.

She turns her back to me once again, heading to her closet. She picks out a shirt and jeans to wear. “Be right back,” she says, taking the clothing items to the bathroom so she can change.

“How do I look?” I ask, smoothing down my shirt. I picked out a blue crop top with a sweetheart neckline. The waist of the straight legged, somewhat baggy jeans I paired with it reach the hem of the blouse.

Spencer looks up, his eyes shining. “Good. You look good,” he says, and his throat sounds so dry I might offer him a glass of water.

I smile softly and grab my white sneakers. After slipping them on and popping in a pair of silver hoop earrings, I motion for Spencer to follow me. On my way out of my room, I grab the jacket I borrowed from him.

The freshly done waves in my hair bounce as I walk down the stairs. Dad and Jack have turned in for the night, but of them being tired from hard work (for my brother, that means playing with his friend all day.)

Spencer and I walk down to his car.

“So where is this party?” He asks, turning the key.

“It’s a house west of Georgetown. You’ll know it when you see a bunch of cars,” I tell him.

“Georgetown?”

“Mhm. Rich, smart kids party. Shouldn’t be too horrible for you, old man.”

“I’m ignoring the last words of that sentence,” he says.

I grin, teasing him. “Do what you need.”

“How did you find out about it if you don’t go to school here?” Spencer questions.

“Social media. I know someone at Georgetown, and he posted a bottle of vodka with the caption ‘turn up tonight’,” I explain. “And I know where he and his roommates live because I am a pro internet stalker.”

“Should that concern me?” His eyebrows raise.

“Only a little,” I scrunch my nose with a smile.

He shakes his head, averting his attention back to the road.

He finds a parking spot, and I lead him into the house. Four boys rent this place, and it’s quite obvious. Though places like this make for the best parties.

Spencer follows close behind me as we step into the house. There’s drunk people dancing sloppily to loud music, almost drunk people attempting to talk over said music, and I would bet couples and strangers hooking up upstairs.

The look on Spencer’s face tells me he’s already hating this decision.

“Just try to have fun, yeah?” I request, leaning up into his ear so he can hear me.

“Okay,” he nods.

I flash him a small smile. We make our way to the kitchen to grab a drink. We unspokenly promise each other not to get any more than slightly tipsy, though I know he’ll probably only have one drink.

We, well, I mingle with some people I don’t know, while Spencer stands next to me, listening.

“Do you want to play a game?” I ask him, practically yelling so I’m audible.

“What game?”

“I don’t know. We could see what they have outside.”

“I could beat you in chess again,” he grins.

“Shut up.” I grab his wrist and lead him outside.

There’s quite a few people out here playing cornhole, beer pong, flip cup, twister, and darts.

“How’s your aim?” Spencer asks.

“Not great.”

“Want to play darts?”

I shrug. “I guess.”

We sneak past drunk college kids and make our way to the dart game. To clear away the guys already playing, I say there’s a kid puking his guts out over by a tree. Works like a charm.

After a few rounds, Spencer realizes I hustled him. “You little liar!”

“It’s not lying, it’s strategic,” I laugh.

“Evil,” he accuses.

“You should’ve known better. I was raised by a man who carries two guns. My aim is impeccable.”

Spencer makes a face of pure defeat and acceptance as he nods.

I pat his shoulder ‘sympathetically’ with a victorious smirk.

On our way to play another game, one of my favorite songs fills my ears. I grab Spencer’s hand. “Come dance with me.”

“I don’t dance,” he says.

“Yeah, and you also don’t win at darts. Come on,” I pull him inside.

We push past people mingling, red solo cups in their hands. We find ourselves in the living room, others dancing around us.

“What do I do?” He asks.

“Put your hands on me.”

Spencer looks like his brain is about to short circuit from overthinking my statement. I grab his hands gently and place them on my hips. Mine then hold onto his shoulders.

“This feels like slow dancing,” he says.

“It’s a little different. Now basically we jump up and down like children or sway our hips on opposite directions. Depends on the beat of the song.”

“How is that dancing?”

I laugh. “I don’t know. It’s just what you do at parties.”

“Seems weird,” Spencer states.

“I could do what she’s doing.” I point over to a girl in a pink dress. Her back is pressed up against a guy’s chest. She slides down, his hands on her body. Her ass grinds on his lap.

Spencer’s face flushes red, and he looks away.

“This it is then,” I chuckle.

As stupid as he may feel, I’m having fun. Letting loose. Letting loose with Spencer. It’s a weird feeling, specially since loose and Spencer don’t belong in the same sentence, but I’m enjoying it.

Eventually, Spencer gives up on fighting it, and he does loosen up. At least a little.

The song changes, but we keep looking at each other, continuing our movements. We’ve inched closer. I can feel his breath brush my hair.

He smells like vanilla and sandalwood. I wouldn’t have mixed those scents together, but it’s amazing. Especially because it’s on him.

The song changes again, and his hands are still on me, mine clutching his biceps. Even closer. Noses bumping.

The way he’s looking down into my eyes makes my heart stop and speed up at the same time. His hands move down, just a little, but enough for me to notice.

Spencer’s mouth is so close to mine I can almost taste him. Sweet honey and spice, that’s what I imagine he tastes like. I want to test my hypothesis. I want to lean in like I’m 98% sure he’s doing right now.

“I think we should leave.”

Surprisingly, it’s me who says it.

“Why? Are you okay?” He asks, eyes searching mine for any sign of distress.

“Yeah. It’s just getting too loud,” I answer.

He nods and takes my hand gently. He leads me out of the house, through the crowds of people.

When we’re back in his car, I take a deep breath.

“Are you sure you’re okay?” He asks again.

I nod. “Yes. There was just too much going on.”

He looks like he’s about to ask me another question, but he doesn’t. Instead, he drives away.

I pull his jacket on, leaving it unzipped. We drive in mostly silence, my eyes gazing out of the window.

When he pulls into my dad’s apartment parking lot, Spencer unbuckles his seatbelt too.

Receiving a questioning look from me, he walks with me to the lobby and onto the elevator.

“You didn’t have to walk me up,” I tell him.

“I know,” he says nonchalantly.

A smile creeps onto my face. I look down at my shoes, rocking on the balls of my feet.

When the doors open, we step off and walk to my door.

We both pause. There’s no words spoken, no gestures to open the door. We just pause.

I inch closer to him, but he’s the one who closes the space between our lips. Spencer’s hands grab the sides of my face as he leans down, pressing his lips to mine. It’s not hard, but it’s not without force.

Our lips move against each others, heads tilting just the right amount. My hands reach up to grip onto his arms. Spencer’s mouth seems to swallow mine, but I like it. I feel the tension within him. He’s wanted this, just like I have. I can tell.

After a split second pause for air, I slam my lips into his again, my tongue slipping into his mouth. His dominates mine, causing a soft sound to release from my throat.

Spencer’s hands slide back into my hair, holding on but not gripping tightly.

We pull away for air, eyes fluttering open.

We pause again, just standing there breathlessly. “Would you like to come in?”

“I don’t think that’s a good idea,” says his mouth, but his body takes steps inside my apartment as I open the door.

Before we’re even halfway in, his lips are on mine again. He shuts the door quietly then leans me against it. My body melts underneath his. There’s this fire in my belly, simmering down to in between my thighs. It’s almost uncomfortable, but at the same time exciting.

My hand rests in between our bodies on his chest. His are still in my hair, but one inches down to my neck, just his fingertips. Another soft noise releases from me.

“We can’t be doing this.” I hardly hear his words over his heavy breathing and the pounding in my chest.

“Why? We’re just kissing,” I breathe out.

“Because it’s wrong.”

“When did kissing become illegal, doc?” I huff out a slight chuckle.

“Jade.” His tone is like a warning.

“Spencer.”

He sighs, breaking his gaze away from me. “You’re Hotch’s daughter.”

“So? You’re someone’s kid too,” I say, trying to catch his eye again.

“He’s my boss.”

I don’t say anything this time.

Spencer steps back, his hands releasing me. “It’s wrong.”

“Okay. Then go.” My words are quiet.

I move out of his way and open the door for him.

thirteen

tags: @pauline5525mgg @theintimatewriter @lilibet261 @greysviolets @jazzymariexoxoc @one-sweet-gubler @thatsonezesty13 @necromaniackat @awhoreforspencerreid @sebs-oxygen @scarredelirium @bts-sugaplum @awesomeness1679 @preciousbabypeter @yazzyu @cynbx @r3idsp3ncer @1010lizz @tiredbut-here @skulzombiw @lena-1895 @eevee0722 @shakespear-picaso-lovechild <3

[katyspersonal]

8, 15, 16 and 20 for peace ask meme!

(Asks from this ( x ) meme)

8) common fandom opinion that everyone is right about and should say it

Well.. I did not actually expect this to become the common opinion the last time I used this ask meme, but things have changed within past half a year, you know? Now, that Micolash and Laurence being academic rivals, featuring inherent homoerotism within it, is a common thing I CAN SAY THAT fandom is right and should say it dfsjhhfhsd

Now I am just waiting dynamic to transcend the ship and include Rom and Caryll for Choir and Byrgenwerth stand-ins (which is which doesn't matter, either works), so the rivalry takes true MULTI-TRACK DRIFTING and does this:

15) that one (cool) thing you see in fanart all the time

Okay, bonk me on the head very hard if I've already brought it up once, but I kinda love 'foreshadowing' in fanart? For example, Rom featuring flovery accessories in her hair or playing with spiders long before meeting her fate, Adeline picking flowers or liking sea life long before Research Hall, Micolash or Bloody Crow playing with actual corvids as kids... all that! Part of me questions the concept sometimes: is not it more impactful, from story standpoint, if the characters got 'taken into' something that absolutely didn't fit them, changing forever...

But then, at the same time, there is equally sinister vibe, or even irony to it, if someone was introduced to the concepts associated with their darker path early, like if their life path was already marked! ..or maybe I am overthinking what is just a fun think visually again. x) In either case, I like it when people do This Thing. I am pretty sure there are more examples I will recall!

16) you CAN understand why so many people like this thing (characterization, trope, headcanon, etc)

I can understand why so many people like to put Gehrman, Laurence, Ludwig and Maria into a group of four! It works naturally as these characters are all connected, especially all being linked to Gehrman. There are other relevant characters like Logarius (from Church's side) or Djura and Gratia (from Old Hunters' side), or like how my friend @fantomette22 adds Caryll as the fifth person, but like... again, they just work together! The four is a good number before it becomes hard to keep track of characters, but also they are all distinct enough! Ludwig is energetic and often is the brightest part of the team, Laurence is the leader with great ego and ambitions, and Gehrman and Maria interchange roles of 'the depressed friend' and 'the cool badass friend'!

20) part of canon you found exciting or interesting

How about ALL OF THEM. You are talking with the person that had a genuine joy digging through every single history implication across Chalice Dungeons, or analysing implications of weapons and even hunters' hats, or found that Yahar'gul Hunters all have plenty of fundament for lore and personalities!!

Alright, I think for this time I'll pick the fact that Yamamura has seen some real shit and his story. He really IS an odd one out of the League, reciting a Healing Church's motivational prayer as the one thing to still keep him sane, as it is stated that League's "mission" was what drove him insane as he stared into human dregs AND he is a summon in Yahar'gul, Research Hall AND is jailed in the prison for people that learned too many Church's secrets, AND there is a Yahar'gul hunter jailed too (so he helped him to escape Yahar'gul?), AND Valtr does curse "mad doctors" as well.. I already mentioned my headcanons about what went down, but is not it interesting detail that after everything he's learned, he is latching onto what Ludwig was saying? A simpler explanation, coping with the idea of "holiness", even if illusory, was a good distraction from the horrors of human nature. A more complex explanation.......

I can just said it increased up my interest in the character significantly back then!

[devondespresso]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

tagged by @museumgiftshoperaser

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

technically 2, but its a sfw and nsfw version of the same fic fhajklfjdalfjk

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

...6,357. i promise i write.

3. What fandoms do you write for?

just stranger things so far, but i have seriously thought about writing about Fender's gender from Robots (2005) and I promised my friend a Shark Tale fic for their birthday fjalhfdjkalfdj

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Never Again

Never Again (sfw)

fascinating statistics arent they

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

never gotten comments on ao3, i do reply to what i get on tumblr tho because it literally makes my day

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

(including my unposted work) Never Again, tho i think its more bittersweet than unrelenting angst

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

tho its technically not finished, We'll Be Alright (Steve Henderson AU) has a very happy ending

8. Do you get hate on fics?

no, thank god

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

im gonna say no? despite writing something spicy at the beginning of Never Again it was not a good time (for me or Nancy)

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

haven't yet, and while i wont write them off entirely itd have to have really strong potential for me to want to do it

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

nope

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

no

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

no, and i dont know how well id go. on the one hand im usually good at group stuff but im also an annoying perfectionist with my writing

14. What’s your all time favorite ship?

platonically stobin 100%. i dont get nearly as attatched to the romantic ones so i kinda just bounce around the fandom. Really love a lot of the steve harrington rairpairs floating around, plus robin and vickie

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I dont realllly have a writing wip i know i wont finish cause i've just been posting those vague ideas instead of actually writing them becuase i know i wont. My only active wip is the steve henderson au and im hoping praying to god that i dont suddenly loose passion for it

16. What are your writing strengths?

dialogue probably, coming up with how different characters are saying things, what theyre saying, what they mean, all the little differences in their voices, I love it. that and having characters interact with the environment

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

overthinking and underthinking, stopping myself from making something happen or a character do something because theres this pull in my chest telling me its wrong. even just standard selfishness or saying something without the express intent of making sure it wont hurt someones feelings. i also start sentences with verbs djaldjdjaf

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

makes sense if characters are speaking multiple languages i guess. depends on pov and how limited it is to the pov character. like if the pov character doesnt speak spanish it'd be better to write "and they said something in spanish they didnt understand" instead of writing the spanish out assuming the audience doesnt know it either

19. First fandom you wrote for?

stranger things

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

definitely my steve henderson au. i wish it was shared already but at the same time i've editied and changed so much im glad i havnt officially yet. its helped me work through a lot and has even caused noticable improvement in my relationship with my family even if they dont know it exists. i cant promise itll be fully posted soon, but i am so exited for when i do

tagging @stobinesque @marvel-ous-m @eriquin @itsthestrangestthings @findafight @fag4dykestobin (no pressure ofc 💕)

[leofrith]

[20 Question Fic Writer Tag]

I wasn't actually tagged by anyone and I would never usually do this but @ainulindaelynn said anyone could consider themselves tagged and this one looked fun so here I am. 🤪

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

Five! Four one-shots and one multi-chapter WIP.

2. What is your AO3 word count?

16,451

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Currently Assassin's Creed, formerly (but I'm sure I'll be dragged back into it at some point) Star Wars. I also have a bunch of old WIPs for Pacific Rim and (🤢) the MCU but never completed/published any of them.

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

I only have five fics posted so:

Hideaway - 147

Bright Skies - 136

Press On, Move Along - 92

Out of the Cold - 35

Honor Bound - 22

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Yes! I try to respond to every comment I get, even if it's just a short little acknowledgement. Because I would like people to know I see them and appreciate them so they keep commenting. <3

6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Press On, Move Along. Everyone died, dude.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Hideaway!

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Not yet! 🤪

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Yes, as of like... three months ago. I have yet to publish any of it though and it'll probably be a long while before I do, but I also have a little one-shot that may be done long before then if I decide to actually finish it. In terms of "what kind" I think it's pretty vanilla. IDK how else to describe it.🧍🏻‍♀️

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

Not generally, except for the AC Star Wars AU that has taken over my brain. I'm not even sure I would count that as a crossover so much as a fusion AU because there are absolutely no Star Wars characters in it.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

I'm not positive this person was copying my fic, but I distinctly remember not long after I posted Hideaway coming across a fic with the same premise (Din playing hide and seek with the kids on Sorgan), which followed all the exact same plot beats as mine. And I do mean exactly. Obviously the plot itself is not particularly groundbreaking and I think there are plenty of other similar stories out there, but this one was similar enough to set off alarm bells.

I didn't end up doing anything about it because again, I like to give people the benefit of the doubt and it could have easily been a coincidence, but obviously if they had fully reposted my fic then that would be a different story.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Nope!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Actively written a fic with another person? No. Plotted a fic from start to finish in a months-long series of increasingly deranged DMs? So many times. Hi Parker. :)

14. What's your all-time favourite ship?

Girl... I can't answer this. I don't know about "favourite" but if I had to pick a ship that has made me crazy for the most amount of time, it's probably Mako/Raleigh.

15. What's a WIP you'd like to finish but doubt you ever will?

I still think about my post-Mando s2 fix-it fic every once in a while but I honestly doubt I'll ever finish it. Disney has pretty much killed any care I once had for this show and it fucking sucks. :/

16. What are your writing strengths?

I'm not even being modest right now I just actually don't know lmao. Anything that I might qualify as a strength isn't consistent enough for me to feel justified in calling it a strength.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Overthinking my use of commas, editing while I write, feeling directionless when I don't do enough planning ahead of time but feeling suffocated when I do too much planning ahead of time. Also just being sooooo fucking slow, but I think that can be attributed to the overthinking.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

I avoid it as much as humanly possible. If someone is speaking another language I'll usually just note it in the text somehow or, as has been the case with Honor Bound a lot of the time, purposefully write from the POV of a character who doesn't speak that language which, in addition to conveniently sidestepping that issue, works well as a narrative device.

I just absolutely hate the thought of putting Google translated dialogue in a fic and having a native speaker cringe their way through grammatically incoherent dialogue lmao.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Marvel >:(

20. Favourite fic you've ever written?

Honor Bound obviously holds a special place in my heart but Out of the Cold is really good. Like really good IMO.

No-pressure tags: @orphiceonian, @aeide, @findusinaweek, @reiverreturns, @basimibnishaqs, ????? anyone else who wants to <3

[dontbelasagnax]

Fic Writer 20 Questions

Thank you for the tag @lttrsfrmlnrrgby! I am so very behind on all the tag games oops

1.) How many works do you have on ao3?

Technically 41 but 35 are fics and 6 are artworks.

2.) What's your ao3 word count?  

150,270!

3.) What fandoms do you write for? 

Currently I mainly write for Star Wars (codywan) but I also write for Good Omens! In the past I've also written fic for Doctor Who, Supernatural, Hannibal, and Criminal Minds. I think there's also a She-Ra fic that never made it past a couple paragraphs in my Google Docs 😂

4.) What are your top five fics by kudos?

1- kiss it better, baby: short and sweet destiel fic exploring sex repulsed asexuality in omegaverse

2 - Some Secrets aren't Meant to be Told: unfinished reader insert Criminal Minds x Supernatural crossover casefic I started when I was a teenager and abysmal at writing. Not to further disparage my age appropriate writing skills, but the formatting makes it nearly unreadable. We all learn and grow

3 - I'll Try and Somehow Make a Meaning of the Poison in this Place: 5 firsts between codywan as friends-with-benefits PLUS 1 time as boyfriends!

4 - catch me if you can (you already have): very sweet THERE WAS ONLY ONE BED codywan fic

5 - you're cute when you're nervous: good ol' codywan fic where they fulfill their promise of "after the war"

The blurbs are necessary because I do not recognize my fics by their titles 😂

5.) Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I respond to every comment! Sometimes it just takes me a while because I've got anxiety and overthink everything. But I do always eventually reply! *glances at my inbox of 45+ comments and sweats*

6.) What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

If you discard the blip of an epilogue at the end of what's left unspoken, your heart will ache. I wrote the epilogue because after I finished the fic, I read it through, sat back and thought "ow, what the fuck". Couldn't leave myself and everyone else with that bittersweet open ending.

7.) What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Oh God. Everything I've ever written has a happy ending. I don't even know, man. Maybe my fwb codywan fic since it has so many rocky bits that the ending feels all the more sweet?

8.) Do you get hate on fics?

Very fortunate to say that I haven't!

9.) Do you write smut? If so what kind?

Yes, yes I do. My smut exists as an expression of love and a vessel of emotional and physical intimacy between the characters. Even when I think I've just written something properly fucknasty, all my comments are like "wow this is so soft and sweet 🥺". Genuinely, my smut is so asexual. It's rare I write characters experiencing sexual attraction; it's all about how the characters feel, both physically and emotionally. I've not done a very good job of making this sound sexy. I promise people say it's hot too.

I really respect authors who write unabashedly horny things without the characters being in love. Hats off to you guys. I've got no fucking clue how that works!

10.) Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

I have written one crossover (the one linked in the kudos question) but I don't think it was particularly crazy. Don't think I'll ever write another crossover but I do love fusions and I've done one of Sleeping Beauty and Star Wars! I'd definitely love to do something like that again.

11.) Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not to my knowledge.

12.) Have you ever had a fic translated?

I haven't but that would be so cool.

13.) Have you ever cowritten a fic before?

Nope!

14.) What's your all time favorite ship?

Oh goodness. Well. Hm. My ships have all gotten me through the lowest points of my life thus far and led me to meet my most treasured friends. I don't think I could concretely give an answer to this because every ship is special to me in a different way. I will say that I find myself so unbelievably grateful for codywan these days. 

15.) What's a WIP you'd like to finish, but doubt you ever will?

I have a Hannibal coffeeshop AU (Hannibal is still a cannibal, he just falls in love (unhealthily obsessed) with Will who's the only barista at the overpriced coffeeshop he frequents to get his order perfectly correct every single time) that I loooooove but I genuinely have not been able to get into the right headspace and flow to finish it.

16.) What are your writing strengths?

I'm really good at writing tender and heartfelt emotions. All the sap. It's my niche. If it's not implanted into every crevice of the fic just how sickeningly in love the characters are with one another, then it's not something I've written. I don't even do it on purpose most of the time. I sneeze and it appears on the page.

17.) What are your writing weaknesses?

I cannot possibly comprehend drafts (for fic writing). Everything has to be as close to how it is in my head on the first try. This is why it takes me so excruciatingly long to write anything. I hunker down and overthink and rewrite the same sentence five times over the course of an hour. Yes I know this isn't a sustainable writing method, HOWEVER, I've never claimed to have a good method of writing. Also, I'm not changing it. I'm stuck in my ways and I like it here. I'm cozy.

18.) Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

If not done in a very specific way, it's definitely a pet peeve of mine.

19.) First fandom you wrote for?

Doctor Who!

20.) Favorite fic you've ever written?

At the moment, it's you're cute when you're nervous. Everytime I read it--which isn't often because I like to give myself time and space from my fics so I can enjoy them properly--it hits me with violent waves of emotion. Everything feels so palpable. I just really love it.

I've got no clue who's already been tagged so, truly, these are no pressure tags: @shortcuts-make-long-delays @aquaticflames @inkformyblood @agreekdemigod @cillyscribbles

[angeart]

On some level, isn't having the ability to doubt your feelings also kind of proof that those feelings might be real? Like, if charmspeak is supposed to make me fall that hard, would it really leave room for me to question that I fell at all?

If it was something I truly didn't want, surely some part of my brain would register that, even if it's just a small part buried somewhere. If I'm doubting at all, at worst maybe a day or two away from the person isn't overall unreasonable to try, so they can't keep allegedly using this power on me and give time to see if my brain does go wait why am I doing this? (And if we're looking at Scarian specifically hey look 100 hour hardcore happened, that's like 4 days worth of time Grian was supposed to be by himself, even tho Scar showed up 8 hours in)

-🎀

i think the difference here is that grian doesn't think he's completely manipulated. he's not just a lovesick puppet, blasted with charm magic constantly. but he still doesn't know if his feelings came from his own heart, or from an outside influence.

i really like your idea for a potential solution, though! yes. they should spend some days apart.

(insert stressed out scar, thinking he'll never see grian again. he knows how much grian overthinks things and how very capable he is of pushing people away, even if he cares about them.)

(insert grian who's equally stressed because he instantly wants to go back, but is trying to stay away, and he doesn't know how long is long enough for this test, and. it's a whole mess actually too. grian's primed to resist, he just doesn't know if there's any end to it. is he resisting the magic? or himself?)

they don't understand the magic enough to know if it has lingering effects. they don't know how long those would stay.

by the end of it, this experiment doesn't prove anything to grian.

[the-stray-storyteller]

Write Questions

*tips hat* @ashwithapen

Tenderly tagging: @tea-and-mercury @thetruearchmagos @theroseempress @desastreus @kooperation1101

(questions given at the end.)

1) What motivates you to write?

Well it's in my username. I am a storyteller. It's what I have loved doing from a very young age even thought it wasn't through writing. I enjoyed telling about mythological stories to my friends and dictating stories through dance. Writing is just something I picked up a few years ago. The ability to create new worlds from my imagination and bring other's to it is fucking amazing. Not sure if that's a proper answer or not.

2) A line/short snippet of your writing that you are most proud/happy of. If not maybe share a line of someone else's work you love (just please credit them)

*laughs bitterly* I am not a big fan of my own work. Also I don't remember my work or other's work well enough to remember a line I liked a lot properly. However...I found this line a long time ago and fell in love with it.

"Now, do not misunderstand me; when I call myself a shell I mean–a used up bullet casing. As in, the aftermath of something lethal.  As in, an echo of inflicted evil."

The post is here.

3) Which OC makes you smile every time you think/talk about them and what are they like?

Skyler from Defenders. I don't know why...they are just so fascinating to me. Well Skyler from three years in the future of the original storyline. The current Skyler I am writing is a fucking asshole.

Future Skyler acts like a cat (there is actually a reason behind that) and is adorable and an excellent flirt. They overthink things when it's not necessary and doesn't think at all when it is required. They are mythology obsessed (like me). They also refuse to learn magic in an academy because they are afraid that learning it in an academy will cause them to loose interest in it. So they are self taught.

4) What process of writing do you enjoy the most?

Daydreaming about plots and scenes that I will never write.

5) What part of writing do you think you are the best at? (Yes stroke your own ego it's okay)

Describing stuff I guess. Idk.

6) What is something in the writeblr community is most enjoyable?

Interaction. I LOVE THE INTERACTION. I was on wattpad before I came here and I felt so lonely over there. No one talked to anybody (at least not me). It just felt so cold over there. Then I came here and SUDDENLY there were so many fucking writers to talk to. There were tag games and ask games. Writing tips and resources would pop up on my dash. Then the memes and so many more things.

7) A writing tool/device you use that helps you with writing? (It could be speech to text, a writing program etc)

I just spam words onto google docs. And occasionally plot on sticky notes. That is all I do to write. I don't use any program or anything.

8) A piece of worldbuilding that you like in your own story? (It could be the magic system, a particular place in the story, a law etc)

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA. *more screaming*

There are too many. First things first. The piece of worldbuilding that will always remain my favourite is:

The names that the Facility assigned to the trainees in my WIP, Rebel.

In the Facility the identity of the trainee is taken away once they join. The Facility renames them and it is a psychological move which is similar to the whole 'if you give the dog a name then it's yours' kind of thing. It is a power move to show that the trainees belong to the Facility, they belong in such a way that the Facility can rename you.

So anyways.....the name given to the trainees is the first three letters of the month they were born in a dash and the day were born on. For example the main character: May-05

If a trainee with a similar birthday joins after the first May they will be named:

May-205

And the next will be named:

May-305

and so on.

The second piece of worldbuilding I am proud of is the still developing magic system in Defenders. I have a whole fucking doc for it.

9) What piece of advice would you say to encourage others to write if they are having a rough patch?

My darling...if you didn't love writing you wouldn't be here worrying about it. If you love writing I am sure the ideas are just baking in you head. You just have to wait for it to be ready and then it will come out of the over by itself. Till then just make another cake or a small cupcake, maybe some cookies or something entirely different.

(Has my advice giving improved? I am usually shit at it)

10) Tag some people whose works you love/have been your biggest supporters:

@avocado-frog my first mutual who is also my first friend in this hell site. He has been with me from the very start. I love him and his over detailed WIP.

@holdmyteaplease she is just a ray of pure beautiful sunshine. HOW ARE YOU SO SWEET? You have no idea hos much you make me smile.

@i-eat-books-and-nutella she really isn't online on tumblr anymore but she is the first beta reader I have had. She has read all of my works and supported me to this day.

@toribookworm22's worlduilding wednesday asks helped me out of a really bad writer's block (not really a support thing but it helped me so much)

ANYWAYS...

THE QUESTIONS:

1) What motivates you to write?

2) A line/short snippet of your writing that you are most proud/happy of. If not maybe share a line of someone else's work you love (just please credit them)

3) Which OC makes you smile every time you think/talk about them and what are they like?

4) What process of writing do you enjoy the most?

5) What part of writing do you think you are the best at? (Yes stroke your own ego it's okay)

6) What is something in the writeblr community is most enjoyable?

7) A writing tool/device you use that helps you with writing? (It could be speech to text, a writing program etc)

8) A piece of worldbuilding that you like in your own story? (It could be the magic system, a particular place in the story, a law etc)

9) What piece of advice would you say to encourage others to write if they are having a rough patch?

10) Tag some people whose works you love/have been your biggest supporters:

[skyyknights]

20 Questions For Fic Writers

Tagged by @zeldaelmo @nocturne-side-blog @aegon-targaryen !! Thank you all!!

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

59 in total, but only 46 are available to the public 😅 I think I ended up putting some of the ones I wasn't as fond of, or ones that I just didn't feel like updating ever again, to a private collection lol

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

212,020!

3. What fandoms do you write for?

hooboy.

Legend of Zelda, mainly, but also: How to Train Your Dragon, Miraculous, LOTR, 1917, MCU, Narnia, Endeavour, and a few other extremely obscure fandoms hardly anyone else is in XD

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

the faces left behind (LU which I know many people hate but I like it so don't judge lol)

Marinette Has Cookies (Of Course Chat Showed Up) (what an annoying title actually??) (Miraculous)

Just Allergies? (How to Train Your Dragon)

Juli's Tree (Flipped)

The Power of a Hot Drink (Skyward Sword)

wow I am... not good at coming up with fic titles 😂 nowadays I just pick a song lyric from a song that applies and slap it on the title but other than that they're pretty horrible 💀

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Yes! Although sometimes if there's really no way to respond to it I just mark it as read.

...also usually it takes me a while to get the motivation to reply. I've been known to take months before answering a comment 😬

6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Oo hm... I can't decide so instead I shall dump a handful of them

One Last Look - Skyward Sword Zelink, after that scene

Age - Sksw Zelink through the years, with a bittersweet ending

Golden Sands - this is one of the first fics I ever posted (originally posted on Wattpad... oof). but basically it's about the robot Skipper from Skyward Sword, thinking about his past life while broken and unable to move in the present.

Incomprehensible - POV of other hobbits in the Shire, unable to understand why the four Travelers act the way they do, or why eventually their number drops to three.

Regrets - Joandeavour talking about... tough things :(

Please, Ada - Babey™ Legolas wanting to hang with his father and his father does NOT want to hang with him is the happiest way I can describe it

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Take three because I'm indecisive.

Worthy - Edmund Pevensie coming to terms with the fact that he is loved

Spidey - Spideychelle being oblivious. that is all

Rainy Days - TP Zelinkkkkkk

there's definitely more but I think those are probably some of the happiest

8. Do you get hate on fics?

My fics usually have a pretty small reception so I don't think so? The most would be someone saying the plotholes of the fic were killing them which then sent me, a major overthinker, into overdrive, even though it's not that bad XD so no, thankfully, I don't think I've ever gotten any (although anon hate is another thing entirely. LOL)

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

nope! don't ever plan to either

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

erm. I don't think I ever have?? I've read one or two before, but I don't believe I have ever actually written one

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

I don't think so XD

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

again, idt so!!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

nope! It's a dream of mine though, Noct and I have several things planned >>>>>>:)

14. What's your all-time favorite ship?

oh boy.

so

this is a tricky question

and

the answer is.

all of them

ok jokes aside I genuinely cannot narrow it down, so I'll list... my top five, I guess.

Zelink, Joandeavour, Spideychelle, Rudy/Liesel, and Hiccstrid

(Hm. Thinking about it Joandeavour is probably my favorite just because it's so heartbreakingly tragic, but Zelink is a very very very close second)

15. What's a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

hah.

Probably this, a fix-it Spideychelle fic that I have a lot written for but idk if I'll ever have the guts to do much else with it

16. What are your writing strengths?

d. description I guess?? I've never been a good judge at what I'm good at XD

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

I tend to be a bit Victor Hugo-esque with my sentences, aka I have to control myself so the sentence doesn't stretch on for five paragraphs

and we don't talk about my old fics <3

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

I mean? For LOTR I would definitely sprinkle in elvish just for the vibe of it, also because he did so, but I would also provide translations. For real-world...hmm. I think I did throw in three or four German words in The Book Thief fic I posted recently, but again, the author himself did so, and I think so long as you're not adding a full, necessary sentence that the reader is then required to look up in order to understand what's going on, and if you instead just use a curse word or a muttered phrase of annoyance or something in the other language, I think that's fine.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

LOTR, I believe. Hand-written in seventh or eighth grade XD

(And then I wrote dozens of unfinished Loz fics in the notes app on my mom's ancient phone she didn't use anymore, fics that completely misunderstood any of the games because I hadn't played them yet. It pains me to think about those fics).

(also this is not counting those "add on to the end of the story!" assignments teachers used to give out in middle school)

20. Favorite fic you've ever written?

oh hot dang lemme see

againnnn we are doing several (look my decision making has been ATROCIOUS lately, I cannot be faulted <3)

you feel like home - SkSw Zelink, a teeny tiny bit of angst but mostly fluff (also Link nearly throws hands with Scrapper which is a bonus. When I tell you I cranked that fic out in a day after getting so salty with Scrapper I nearly snapped my wiimote in half)

would I run off the world someday - a very recent TP Zinc fic!! It has traces of Midlink; essentially, it's about Link refusing to stop grieving Midna, and thus hurting himself and Zelda, who is in love with him due to having shared a soul with Midna. It's basically a 4+1 fic and does end happy with the promise of future Zelink, very different from my normal Zelink stuff though

annnd...

Forbidden - Zinc week fic that didn't get as much attention as my other two ZW fics, but I actually really really love it so. <3 I just. idk I love the prose of that fic, I suppose :) and the ending hehe

I do have a few other favorites but I think it's unfair to include them because they're unfinished lol

tagging: @aheavenscorner @minstrelsmusings @onewingedsparrow (sorry if you've already been tagged oops)

[anincompletelist]

weekend wip game! :D

thank you thank you @daisymae-12 for the tag, I SO enjoyed reading through your current projects (and everyone else's that have been floating around!) I have so many of my own that I scream about privately but I suppose I can do it publicly as well with the right persuasion (this. definitely this.) anyway -

PLEASE feel free to do this and tag me if you haven't already. I LOVE reading about yall's current projects! <3 (also much love to @welcometololaland for creating this fun game!)

I hope you're all doing well! :D

-- anincompletelist/sarah

+

Rules: List your WIPs below (if you only write one fic at a time, feel free to include future WIPs/ideas!) then answer the following questions. Then, tag as many people as you have WIPs (or more). (questions for artists/gifmakers here).

1. WIP List:

[hitman alex / prince henry au]

poetry fic (literally SO much poetry this is my Baby) [computer science major alex/english major + poet henry]

coworkers/fake dating au (part of firstprince first kisses)

[journalist+escort alex/prince henry]

boxer alex au / snippet here

truman show au [henry as truman/alex as lauren] !!! partially in script format

dog walker alex au (feat. DAVID!)

abdication au [lawyer alex] LOTS of family drama/henry angst and most of it takes place on a TRAIN which for some reason to me makes it so much more intriguing

drunk dial au [based on 'dial drunk' by noah kahan - canon divergent - years after the worst breakup of either of their lives, alex manages to get himself arrested during a trip to london and the only person he can think to call is henry, his ex. (things work out, of course. I am incapable of writing unhappy endings)]

bridesmaids au (june is getting married, brother alex and best friend henry are her (rival) ‘best men’/bridesmen who are always trying to compete to give her the best wedding possible)

lots of other little drabbles and oneshots -- honestly this list grows every day but these are the main ones!!

2. Which of your WIPs is currently the longest?

poetry fic!

3. Which WIP do you expect will end up the longest?

poetry for sure, but truman fic is a close second!

4. Which WIP is your favourite to write/the most enjoyable to write? Why?

it definitely changes day-to-day, even though it stresses me out to have a lot of projects going at once (skjhdjhs) I enjoy being able to switch around between them and write whatever I'm in the mood for!

5. Which WIP do you find the most intimidating to write? Why?

probably truman au. I have big plans for it and I've fleshed out the characters really well and I feel like the trope is PERFECT for alex&henry and it (to my knowledge) hasn't been done before so! I want to do them justice. also it's surpassingly fun to write scenes in script format!!!

6. Which WIP do you experience the most self-doubt about. Why?

all of them, to a degree (the universal Creative Experience). but I think poetry fic? it deals with some heavier themes and the characters are so special to me (it also deals with a lot of my own personal struggles and features some of my own poetry) so I worry about it being perceived well or being relatable to other people.

7. Which of your WIPs will you seek out a beta/sensitivity reader for? Why?

I'm not sure if I will! when I wrote in other fandoms I had a lovely friend that would look them over for me and we'd talk about them, but they don't write for this fandom and I overthink SO much that if someone gives me criticism I may just scrap the entire scene sjkhkjhd. I kind of just post and hope for the best!

8. Have any of your WIPs been struck by the curse of writer's block?

on a steady rotation :D perks of having so many wips that I can just switch it up when I get stuck!

9. Which WIP has your favourite OC? Tell us about them?

I'm fully aware I sound like a broken record but definitely poetry fic. i can’t say too much without giving away some of the plot but he’s an older man who can relate to henry in a lot of ways and kind of becomes a part of their story <3 he’s only in a couple of scenes but they’re so important to the story!

10. Which WIP is the sexiest?

hitman alex for SURE, but journalist/escort is definitely a close second.

11. Which WIP is the angstiest?

oh gosh, it's between hitman / abdication / poetry / boxer / and truman ?? but honestly I can't write anything without a little angst, so! I feel like there's so many elements to their dynamic that are just perfect for it (with mandatory happy ending of course)!

12. Which WIP has the best characterisation (in your humble opinion)?

most accurate? probably poetry fic. most fun to write? hitman.

13. Which WIP has the best scene setting (in your humble opinion)?

POETRY!!! it's literally the personification of autumn and warm blankets and falling leaves and old books and alex's cinnamon coffee (of course) and Henry runs a poetry club and they're both so soft and ugh it's just the best ever and I wish I could live in it. (in my own humble opinion).

14. Which WIP have you worked the hardest on?

as far as research goes, definitely poetry.

15. Which WIP do you have the highest expectations for? Why?

I'm not really sure. I wrote in another fandom that I always felt like everything I posted had to cater to who was going to read it and it's been extremely liberating to write for RWRB and just post what *I* like or would want to read. I don't really care about hits, but my biggest hope with anything I post is always that it makes someone else feel seen/heard/validated or brightens their day/night a little, the way that so many other fics/art have for me. <3

16. Do you dream about any of your WIPs?

YES. I have the angstiest dreams and anytime I hurt my own feelings I wake up and write it down immediately. (ESPECIALLY with hitman and journalist recently).

17. Do any of your WIPs have particular complexities that your other fics don't?

truman au for sure. it's written in alex's pov and we only see henry through script format for the first half. I'm really excited about it, I've never written anything like it before and I think it adds such a cool element to the story (if I can figure out how to format it correctly on ao3 jhskdhj - we'll cross that bridge when we get there I suppose).

18. Which WIP is the funniest or has the most humour?

coworkers and dogwalker I would consider to be 'funny' fics -- lots of banter and joking with each other and general lightheartedness!

19. Do any of your WIPs contain outside POVs or a deep dive on a character other than the main ship? How are you finding that process?

not currently, but I LOVED writing June's character in this fic because I have a chronic illness myself and I liked getting to explore it from an outside perspective! I also would love to explore a bit more with henry's dad and their storyline at some point as well.

20. Tell us one thing we don't know about one or more of your WIPs.

here, have THREE!

henry's poetry club in poetry fic is called 'speak easy' and is held in an old speakeasy lounge

in the hitman fic, alex goes by the codename Ander in public

abdication au is inspired by a five minute scene in a james bond film that takes place on a train and just spun out from there kjshdjhs

YAY that was so much fun, thank you again for tagging me @daisymae-12 , had a super bad chronic illness day the last several days so this has been such a fun and much welcome distraction.

I don't have a lot of people that I know of that haven't done this, but off the top of my head -- @inexplicablymine (I know you shared wips but I'd love to hear more detail if you're interested in sharing!) @onward--upward @firstprincewrites @magicandarchery @sparklepocalypse and anyone else who comes across this post!

again, there's NO pressure at ALL but I would love to hear what y'all are working on and just what you're up to in general!

I hope all of you guys are doing well, I'm so ridiculously grateful for all of the work you guys put out and the difference that you make. have a wonderful weekend and take care! :D

[ofwraithsandwords]

Sees: "This sort of goes into my headcanon on how Integra's father has influenced her conduct with her subordinates and her position as director, but that's another subject entirely."

May you please explain more about this! (same anon btw). I am very interested! I feel like it might be in the minority of thinking she's not a very good leader/director. Her go-to solution to most things is to send Alucard out. Which always leads to a mess. Even her father realized that using him too much could've been bad. Not sure why or how he came to that conclusion. Or if ever learned from it in his later life… But I do find it interesting that his daughter proceeded to use Alucard for everything involving vampire extermination. Even gaining a replacement for alucard in seras during the 30-year gap.

More likely, stuff like that was written for cool set pieces/fights rather than show questionable leadership choices. Thus some of my confusion comes from whether this is sloppy writing or was actually intended in some way. Also, I should end this by saying this isn't a knock on her character. I just like to overthink ideas in this manga too much.

Hey again, Anon! Sorry for the delay!

Yeah, I do feel like Integra's leadership skills are definitely lacking in certain situations, but like you said, this is likely more of a way to showcase Alucard's abilities and violence in the anime as opposed to showing how Integra is kind of an incompetent director.

But here's the thing: you have to remember that Integra was given the organization when she was...14, I think? So she basically had 7 or 8 years to learn all the ins-and-outs of not only vampires as a species, but occult/supernatural-related subjects as well AND has to direct, supervise, plan, and mitigate any incidents/operations thrown her way. All the while keeping this secret sector of the English government totally under wraps. So...no pressure?

Like you, I don't think less of Integra as a character if she's seen as a faulty leader. In fact, I think it makes sense in certain cases and makes her characterization more complex and nuanced.

Anyways, as far as my headcanons about how her father shaped some of her mannerisms goes, I think it was his more clandestine behavior is what really effected Integra the most. The womanizing, drinking, smoking, fraternizing with other officials and superiors, keeping the true nature (or at least part of) the Hellsing Organization from his only daughter - the list goes on. Being around this behavior is going to have an impact on a child, especially seeing how her father probably treated women as little more than arm candy and a means for pleasure.

I think this might've been part of what drove Integra to dress in suits, to smoke cigars, and go by "Sir" in order to be on the same pedestal as her male counterparts. You could argue that it's because only knights could join the Round Table of Protestant Knights and not dames, but honestly? It's not like they couldn't make an exception. They wouldn't have had a choice. Regardless of what your opinion is, Integra chose to go by "Sir". No one calls her Mistress Integra, Lady Integra, or Dame Integra - there's only one person that refers to her with a female title and it's the Nazi war criminal himself with "Mein Fräulein".

I also have a headcanon that until Seras showed up, Integra was very in the closet and had a good bit of internalized misogyny. I mean, she grew up around and was raised almost exclusively by men, most of which who implicitly benefited from their patriarchal government. I'm sure a few of them had a few choice things to say about women and minorities in general despite Integra being half-Indian.

Anyway, once Seras was introduced and she and Integra spent the next 3 decades together, I like to think that Integra really unlearned quite a bit of the prejudice that was put on her at an early age and came to be proud of her identity as a half-Indian woman.

Most unsavory comments are met with criticism or a good glare from her which ended up causing quite a rift between her and some of the other knights. But most of them are maggot food at this point, so it doesn't really matter.

I will say though, despite her being much more respectful than her father, she's been known to put on the charm in front of a pretty lady once in a while.