#whump rewind

[atihkinsam]

I live and die for whump!sam you see. I refuse to believe that there isn't a HUGE HUGE demographic of the spn-enjoying population (likeme) that randomly happened upon the abnormal incestuous brothers show, but was hooked and then stayed and went cuckoo for cocoa puffs for the show due to Jared Padalecki's stellar WHUMP acting.

Like this man made me sympathise, nay EMPATHISE and EXCUSE Dean's Winchester macabre obsession with possessing his baby brother's body and soul.

[befuddled-calico-whump]

had a dream about vampires

I was part of a group/organization that was actively at war with a vampire cult, and at one point we were attacked, but ended up fighting off the majority of the vampires, and actually capturing two, that were either brother and sister or close friends

We needed information about the cult, so I just remember putting the male out in the sun/otherwise torturing him to try and get the female to crack

[amplexadversary]

.

[fivewantscoffee]

I love fics where Five comes back and his siblings slowly realise they judged him wrong.

Like, yeah, WE know Five loves his family so, so much he kept himself alive through the worst of his life to save them, that he literally figured out a way to rewind time to bring them back to life, but honestly? Five doesn't talk about his feelings. He'd rather start pulling his own teeth.

This all leads to his siblings making some assumptions like how Five's obsessed with the apocalypse or how he doesn't care about their happiness, Five is selfish etc. etc. all of the usual Five whump but one thing leads to another and somehow they find out they were wrong about Five because Five does love them, he loves them so much he would destroy himself to save them.

Because he isn't looking for happy. He hasn't had the luxury of thinking about what he wants in a very long time. Frankly, he doesn't even think it matters.

[whumpfish]

Mostly sounds like the last 15 minutes of The Great Mouse Detective?

Rules here!

The team ends up captured and put in Whumper's death trap lair. The team managed to escape their cell easily, but they must go through seven areas to reach Whumper, all the while avoiding all the death traps. When they eventually reach Whumper, Whumper starts a timed explosion before fleeing. Barely, the team escaped with their lives, and Whumper, who fled on their machine they used to ride in, ran out of gas on their machine and fell into the ocean.

What piece of media does this whumpy scene come from? Tell me via replies here, reblogs, an ask, etc! You have 24 hours!

[whumprecs]

you’ve prob done this but umbrella academy whump/angst recs?? all ur others are so good!

Sorry about the delay! So I am a huge Five fan, so most of them are slanted that way, though I think Diego sneaks in there a few times -but also they're almost all Family Fics.

I'm going to leave off the NSFW/non-con ones I know of, just in case. If you are interested, feel free to send another anon ask (or message if you would prefer) and I'll send links.

i'm walking backward into my own myth by eluvion  Five is in 1963. He’s in 2019. He’s in 2002. Time is falling apart, and Five is in every piece. Five is a disease, and time is coughing up a lung.

Or; Five Hargreeves breaks time.

I kept running (for a soft place to fall) by chromaticality He'd hoped they had given up. Really, he should have known better. The Handler thinks he's the solution to all her problems. Five thinks he'd like to turn the whole place into a slaughterhouse. But with Allison and Luther caught in the crossfire, Five has to cooperate with the Commission's plans until he can figure out a way to get everyone home.

No Time, No Time, Dear Brother O’ Mine by I_Logophile

At Gimbel Brothers department store, Five’s injury is a bit more serious than a simple bullet graze. Not that it matters to him.

That is, until the police show up while he’s trying to leave, and Five finds himself remembering things he’d rather forget. -- There’s something going on with his brother. That much is very clear to Diego.

Why else is Five at a crime scene? Why else is he attacking the people trying to help him? Why else is he going around ranting about time?

There’s something going on with his brother. And Diego is going to find out what.

He just has to get Five some medical attention first.

the walls kept tumbling down by Ingu It started small.

There was a nagging ache in his chest, phantom pain from where the bullets had pierced his flesh, in the overwritten timeline that never will be.

(the one where rewinding time doesn't miraculously resolve mortal gunshot wounds)

Here, Beneath My Lungs by beastboy12

After they get back from the 60's, Five starts investigating a string of suspicious murders while distancing himself from a family he's convinced he's already lost. So, naturally, Klaus and Diego join him. "Holy shit, Five," Diego says, rushing forward. "What the hell happened to you?" Five is off-balanced by the sight of Diego. Shouldn’t he be at the other address? What is he doing here? Klaus appears on the other side of Diego and lets out a laugh that sounds almost frantic. "Oh, thank God you can see him, too.” “Why are you here?” Five says. Diego scoffs. “Yeah, no, the one covered in blood doesn’t get to ask questions.”

Series

Part 1 of Five is an emotionally stunted yogurt lid

The Longest Roads Lead to Home by assaily (twistedskys) Five raised his glass to the rafters. “I’m home,” he said simply. “I’d like to take the time to enjoy that, y’know.”

Diego watched him pour another drink, suddenly understanding him. He’d been gone a long time, lost in a really terrible place that probably never felt like home unless he could somehow forget he was the last soul on Earth. ‘Home’ meant a lot to him.

When Five’s glass was ready again, Diego raised his own, still half-full. “To being home,” he said.

That earned him a smile, a real one that managed to soothe the crease in Five’s brow and make him look so incredibly young in its sincerity, and so incredibly old in its deep gratitude. He raised his glass and clinked it against Diego’s. “To finally being home.”

~-~

Or; Five gets kidnapped and it goes wrong (for the kidnapper).

heart heart head by morimaru

a series of hurt/comfort snippets featuring Five.

Blink by Lady_Origami When Five blinks, sometimes he's back in the world of ash and embers. It's hard to remember how to breathe when that happens. In which Klaus tries to play the role of supportive brother with Ben's help, and Five struggles more than he lets on.

Can you hug me as I go? by maddienole What if the FBI captured Five instead of Vanya?

2x7 canon divergence.

Simple by sharkneto Diego runs into Five at the park. He’s just here to catch a mugger. Why does Five always complicate things?

Lend a Hand by sharkneto If Luther’s being honest, he’s not sure how they’re going to get out of this one. Effectively trapped and powers negated, the Umbrella Academy is in a dire position.

Luther really needs to stop underestimating the lengths Five is willing to go to save his family.

Howling at the Moon by assaily (twistedskys) Five is now a permanent resident of the Hotel Oblivion. The rooms are crap, service is even worse, and he's pretty sure his family left him here. But at least they're safe, right?

A pre-season 3 AU of season 3, Hotel-as-a-prison concept from the comics.

lie awake, sleep awake by morimaru Number Five does not get sick. He refuses to be sick. His body obeys. Right up until it doesn't. (- this one is literally my favorite of all of these rec's, I have lost count how many times I've read it)

and all the kids cried out by morimaru The one where Five is sick, the Handler is clingy and hard to get rid of even after death, and Klaus has a ghost-busting side-gig that is a lot less exciting than it sounds.

Guilt Trip by I_Logophile In typical Five Hargreeves fashion, a drug ring bust with his family turns into a rescue mission, which turns into a complete and utter shitshow. Because, of course, things had to go sideways— No, scratch that. Things didn't just go sideways, things went upside down, backward, and inside out. And then got blown up. Literally.

In the aftermath of the whole fiasco, Five is left reeling, floundering, drowning in guilt.

Because how could he have done that?

How could he have attacked his family?

spoiled by morimaru Number Five is a survivor. He fought his whole life: he fought their father, the apocalypse, the commission, then – the apocalypse, again. Having made that fateful jump back to 2019, he unwillingly left his old body with all of its scars behind. Physical ones, at least. It’s funny, in a way, that the hardest thing for him to fight ends up being food.

The Dangers of Vigilanteing by aceofwhump Diego gets injured during one of his vigilante acts and is forced to go back to the one place he swore he'd never return: The Umbrella Academy

Also, the best way I've found to get to the fics I want in this fandom is to troll through favorites of the authors of my favorite fics. Most fandoms that doesn't seem to work, but this one it does. Happy reading, and again - sorry about the delay!

[real-raincode-takes]

sickness whump is fine not my thing but whatever. can we get more gore. where is the martina cube fanart. I want to see beautiful paintings of train gang immolation. i want to see makoto’s brains being blown out and he slowly regrows them over 24 hours while twitching on the ground in agony. I want to see fubuki continually rewind time while those around her are brutally killed until she runs out of stamina and is unable to run away, her chance at survival ruined by her flimsy hope of saving everyone else. I want to see vivia unable to return to his body as something awful happens to it, while he can only watch. desuhiko suffocating to death in his backpack or something I don’t really care about him. and so so much homunculi potential

.

[unforgivenn]

WOLLEMI DAY 4- AT WEAPON'S POINT

AU of where Caleb *somehow* managed to escape and just starting out his new life happily... hopefully..

CW: Pet whump, Recaptured, themes of captivity, emotional whump, guns!!, shock collar mention, lil bit of angsttt, fear. a lot of it.

Caleb set down the grocery bags, feeling a sense of relief wash over him, finally back in a familiar space where he could begin to rebuild his life. His parents had tried convincing him to stay with him but he just needed some time alone and thankfully, they understood. He hummed to himself, moving towards his room and his closet but froze when he heard a familiar voice behind him.

"Well, well, well, look who decided to crawl out of their hiding hole..." He could basically feel the shit eating grin behind him. Caleb closed his eyes letting some tears drop down his cheeks.

"Dominic..." His heart pounded so fast that he felt it might leap out of his chest. Dominic sighed before grabbing his hair and twisting it pushing him to the wall letting the boy let out a pained cry. He looked at him. Caleb hadn't ever seen him this mad.. And he had seen him mad quite a lot.. He was sure he wouldn't be able to even support his weight if it wasn't for the hand in his hair.

"Guess you've lost your manners too during the time." Dominic slammed his head on the wall as he groaned feeling blood drip down his forehead and nose. He suddenly felt the cold, hard metal of a gun pressing against his temple, the weight of the gun, almost as if it's pushing him down. His heartbeat pounding in his ears, loud and erratic.

"Oh god.. please.. sir please.. I-I swear I won't- I'm so sorry- Please.." He spoke in a shaky, unsteady tone, voice filled with desperation and fear. Brief flashes of all those horrific memories filled his mind. A backhand slap shut him up.

"Goddammit. Do you fucking know how long it took me to find you?! This time I've got to make sure that doesn't happen again.." Dominic paused for a few seconds letting the words settle in Caleb's slow and occupied brain. "You ran away in hope of your family. Didn't chya?" Caleb's eyes suddenly snapped up to his. "Now you won't have anyone in hope for to run away right?" Dominic smiled coldly.

A gut wrenching cry escaped his lips as the reality of his loss sinked in. Tears streamed down his cheeks as he realized there was no escape from The Dominic Sinclair. "No.. God.. P-Please tell me it isnt true.. I'm sorry! I-I wont escape again! Just please.. T-They didn't do anything.."

"Oh pet... Something that's done can't be rewinded hm? Now get up. We're gonna miss our flight."

The whole way Caleb was silent, as if he was waiting to wake up from this horrible nightmare. Dominic had forced a shock collar on him if he decided to do something funny, although Caleb was pretty sure that wasn't going to happen.. There was no point anymore..

[letstalkwhump]

Let's Talk Whump

Let's Talk Whump is a series of interviews with the wonderful members of the whump community. I'm Malice and I'll be your host. Joining us today is the one and only @oddsconvert !

Welcome to Let’s Talk Whump! Do you mind sharing a little about yourself?

Hi there, I’m Shannon! I’m a 21 year old psychology and criminology graduate from the UK! My favourite colour is yellow. I basically have a zoo of pets bahaha; I have four cats, a dog, a rabbit, two rats, three fish and two tarantulas (not mine - they terrify the life out of me!)

When I’m not whumping and traumatising my fictional babies, I love to crochet, listening to/playing music (I play piano, guitar, clarinet and ukulele), and I’m currently teaching myself to draw…for whump purposes ;)

What does whump mean to you? 

For me, whump is freedom and release. Not only is it enjoyable, almost like scratching an itch? But it’s cathartic, and what I now see as a healthy coping mechanism for managing difficult feelings and a way to navigate my own trauma. Although, looking back, whump has been something that’s always been an interest of mine since early childhood, and has stuck ever since! Like rewinding disney films when the princes get tied up ahahah.

And also the comfort element of whump, I think it also helps me explore wants and desires in my own life. Writing my caretakers and their fierce protectiveness, and unconditional care over whumpees feels like it heals a part of me that maybe needed that at times. It gives you such a heartwarming feeling when you see these characters go through hell and back, and have someone to fall on at the end who will be there through thick and thin, regardless how choppy the water gets. 

And how did you find the whump community? What made you want to join? 

I used to scour pinterest for writing prompts! I only ever wrote in private, I’ve never EVER shared my work publicly before and never dreamed I would. But the more and more whumpy pins I was saving I was like “hmmm. These all come from the same site! Let’s go check that out” and then I scrolled the  #whump tag for endless hours instead of doing my university dissertation. I remember coming across @deluxewhump and @darkthingshappen first!

At first I joined as a faceless, lurking blog. I really wanted to hop in and join all the creators I was loving so far but I was terrified. I think I had a bio as something like “working up the courage to post.” And then some lovely anon sent me my first ask saying they’d love to see what I’d post! And I slowly crept out of my shell and bit by bit started building my profile and adding my name and posting my whump drabbles!

Pinterest whump prompts gang rise up! That’s exactly how I found the community too! Has your view on whump changed since you joined? 

I used to be ashamed of liking whump. Like it was some dirty little secret that made me a terrible person and I should keep it to myself. Hide it at all costs. Since joining, and interacting with this world-wide community of whump enjoyers, I realised it’s not something that should be taboo. If anything, it almost feels normal! Look how many thousands love it! And every single whump creator I’ve had the pleasure of meeting has been so kind, supportive and such genuine people! 

It really feels like coming home when you find the whump community and realise you’re not a weirdo! Would you like to share your favourite whump tropes? 

I’ve definitely discovered more about my whump taste! I used to just purely like captivity whump, usually with creepy/intimate whumpers. That was always my go to. Now? I’ve discovered SO many tropes I never even knew about and love! BBU?! Pet whump, whumper turned whumpee, bad caretaker, vampire whump, sickfics, hero/villain and so much more! 

Non-optional, you have to share a favourite piece you've written? Hype yourself up, we want to hear it!

Without a doubt, my first ever chapter of ‘Shattered’ - my bloodbag whumpee/vampire whump series. I’m usually very self-critical of my writing, but I really love how this one came out and how well it was written. I pretty much never get whumperflies off my own writing, but my poor sweet Declan - just living dead and the way Vince is forced to take care of him. 

But also honorary mention - my latest chapter of ‘Play Pretend’ . Play Pretend is my baby, and it was the first chapter of this series I had beta’d by my wonderful friend @whumpcereal and I felt like she just took it to the next level and kicked it up a notch. Josh’s fear and exhaustion came to life and I really enjoyed writing his inner monologue!

You weren’t kidding about the whumperflies in “Shattered”! Hot damn! What's your writing schedule usually look like? 

Night time for sure! Dead of night - 3am most often ahaha. I’m a night owl, through and through. I’ll try and write in the day and nothing comes and then night comes and I’m like brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr, whole chapter done! I usually have some music on in the background, sometimes I make a specific playlist for whatever vibe I’m feeling! And I mostly write when the inspiration strikes, as much as I can get out until the motivation vanishes.

And do you find that the words flow better for somethings than others?

For me, I find it really easy to write my creepy/intimate whumper scenes. For Play Pretend, writing Felix’s deranged and creepy obsession with Josh just comes so naturally (maybe I should be concerned…). The way he’s so unsettling but so adoring with how he speaks to Josh and touches him, I could write it in a heartbeat.

More recently I’ve been trying to delve into the nsfw portions of whump and writing. But I’m a newbie with it, and I really struggle with writing it or making it sound good. 

Is there anything you're working on at the moment?

My usual schedule swings around, I update my series in an order. It tends to be, A Taste of Your Own Medicine, Shattered, then Play Pretend - and I’ve just updated ATOYOM so Shattered is up next! I’m primarily working on a flashback chapter with August currently! But I dot in and out of future chapters too.

I also have planned future whump series to come whenever my current ones finish up! But that’s a little while off yet. 

Give us some writing advice. Bless us with your wisdom, oh awesome one!!!!!

I WILL SCREAM THIS FROM THE ROOFTOPS - WRITE FOR YOU!

Never ever write based on what you think people like/don’t like.  The absolute joy in writing is the freedom in putting the pen to paper, or cursor to doc , and just letting your imagination run wild. Your audience is out there. People that will love and cheer for your writing, and I think you can really tell when an author has enjoyed and had fun with what they’ve written. There’s no good in getting bogged down with what others think. 

Write for you, post for you, and if others hop along for the ride - all the better!

Is there anyone you’d like to give a shout-out to?

I love absolutely everyone in this community, I’m gonna tag so many people - my besties alongside some of my favourite blogs and creators. Ily all you talented people. 

@whumpcereal @darkthingshappen @sparrowsage @quietly-by-myself @whumpsday @for-the-love-of-angst @emmettnet @turn-the-tables-on-them @yetanotheraltwhumpblog @kira-the-whump-enthusiast @pigeonwhumps @whumpshaped @t0rture-me @ha-ha-one @not-a-space-alien @whump-queen @justsomewhumpee @livelaughwhump @writereleaserepeat and I’M PROBABLY MISSING SOME BUT YOU’RE ALL AWESOME

Finally, anything you'd like to add? 

The whump community has quickly started to feel like home to me, I have a lotta love for whumpblr and every soul I’ve met here! Thank you so much for having me and to whoever nominated me!

It’s been a pleasure! 

Happy whumping, people!

Thank you so much for joining us today, @oddsconvert! And to all you awesome folk at home, have a whump-derful day!

[smolghostbot]

GT July: Intimidate (1)

Can We Stop And Rewind?

Decided to do two entries today, both snippets from Patchwork Melody: Spring, Patch and Melody's first meeting story. This is the lower-intensity one, the other (posting in a bit) is very whump.

Context: Melody has brought Patch inside to help them with a sprained arm, but they both have very different ideas of what's going on.

Word Count: 800

Character bios in my pinned post

CWs for accidental ableism (discussed and apologized for) and mentions of kidnapping (a genuine misunderstanding). Also some swearing on Mel's part but if that bothers you this is not the blog for you.

========

Suddenly, their giant captor stood up and walked away. The sprite instantly became terrified. Were they getting something to punish them for their silence? Were they finally dropping the nice facade?

Eventually, the human came back to the table with a large book. Placing it down gently, so as not to scare the tiny creature with a loud thump, they began to flip through the book.

"Okay… pointed ears say an elf, but your ears aren't really very… elven. Maybe you're a mousefolk? But you have no tail… or if you do, it's a tiny one hidden under that little robe of yours… I did find you outside of my house, and your outfit looks a bit ragged… uh, no offense, of course. Maybe you're a brownie? I have some milk in the fridge, would that get you to talk?"

They could only look at the human with a confused look. What was she going on about?

"... No wings, so you probably aren't a fairy… unless you lost your wings. Did you ever have wings, little thing?"

The confused sprite only shook their head in a slow "no".

"OK… well, I probably… uh… should have gone for something more professional than a D&D guidebook… I think I still have my old college textbooks around here somewhere… gods knows those things are way too expensive to chuck…"

The human left, and took several more books off the shelf after a few minutes of looking around. She flipped through each book, taking what felt like forever, muttering to herself as she went.

"We're miles from the nearest forest… you clearly aren't invisible… Definitely don't look human… Those clothes don't look at all suitable for living in water… it's… maybe technically nighttime? But you weren't leaving a gift… unless… you were actually planting seeds! Is this backpack full of seeds?"

The small sprite instantly went into a panic as the human looked over to their backpack, frantically shaking their head in a no, and praying that the human didn't try to dig into the bag. They already had to fix it up after… the last human they met. Luckily, this human seems to have had no plans on that and continued digging through the books, becoming more frustrated over time.

Eventually, they seem to have hit their limit, and threw their head back in agitation before speaking in a more aggressive tone than they had previously. "Ugh! Why won't you just say anything!?"

-

Melody noticed a knocking noise on the plastic container her little "guest" was in, and saw the mysterious little thing clearly trying to get her attention. As she looked over at him, she saw him frantically motioning with his hands over his neck, in an X shape. His mouth was moving, as if speaking in an exaggerated way, as if to make it easier for her to see that no sound was coming out of his mouth. He clearly looked scared, probably threatened by her voice raising. Her eyes lit up in both realization and embarrassment.

"Oh my gods. You aren't just being silent to be difficult… you can't actually speak, can you?" As he nodded a yes, Mel lowered her head into her hands in shame.

"Shit, I'm such a dick. That's what your little hand motions were, oh my gods you were signing! My dumb ass was sitting here thinking you were trying to cast spells or something, ugh, I'm such an idiot! Maybe not everything about this situation is silly and fantastical, Mel, maybe he's just mute and you're being insensitive like always."

Their head raised and their face shifted into a goofy expression as they began to cheer with a clearly sarcastic voice, "Yeah Mel, yeah, woo, get upset at a mute guy for not speaking, like a COMPLETE ASSHOLE, hell yeah, casual ableism, woo!!"

The human hung her head in embarrassment again before continuing to berate herself, putting her head in her hands.

"Ugh… I swear, I didn't know, if I had known I would never… I'm not some, like, prick, I swear. Oh my gods, I'm so stupid. Way to make a first impression, at least I know you can't hex me or whatever because I would be so cursed right now for sure."

If the sprite could communicate at the moment, and wasn't still terrified of this human, they'd have some strong words about how kidnapping is also not a good first impression. However, they have no intent on insulting their captor, despite the clear look of regret already on the human's face. They remain still, waiting for the human to compose themself.

[we-are-the-spiders-from-mars]

So I've seen a lot of people talk about their whump awakening lately, and there has been a lot of goods one mentioned, but one I haven't seen anyone talk about is Hunchback of Notre Dame! When Phebus gets shot with the arrow while fleeing after saving that family from the fire, the way he fell into the water and had to be dragged out by Esmeralda. And we get a care scene where she stitches him up! My first ever whumperflies. Little me hit rewind so many times on that scene that I wore the tape out. I can't be the only one.

[aswallowimprisoned]

Restless far from a Wine Dark sea - Day 3 (rewind) hold my hand

Waking up in a PTSD attack is never fun, but Nurse Johns is here to hold his hand

Tw PTSD flashback attack, broken bones, captivity, medical whump, injury, Dead Dove Jewish vampiric whumpee, restraints

RestlessffaWDs' timeline is going off piste for @medwhumpmay

Within the first month of captivity, but not too soon.

masterlist

≪ °❈° ≫

Nurse Johns watched as the merman’s nose crinkled as he started to wake up, his tail fins spreading and stretching out to their full colossal size, and his hands relaxing their vice-like grip on the sheets.

Seeing a sea monster wake up was still a novelty, all the staff poised watching the creature wake.  

But rather than waking with a bleary blink, the seamonster flinched violently against his bonds, heart rate rocketing as he stared at the therapist sitting next to him with wide unseeing eyes of fear.

“Hey Fogel, it's me, Elias. You're waking up, ok?” 

The merman jerked against his restraints again, breath coming in short bursts as he let out an inhuman whine of fear.

“It looks like another PTSD flashback.” Logan, the other anthropologist, spoke through the comms.

“You're ok Fogal, shhhh, no one is hurting you right now, no one is going to hurt you, you are in a bed, covered with a blanket, can you feel the cotton? You're ok shh…” The therapist started crooning soft affirmations to try to bring him out of it. Nurse Johns had seen quite a lot of post-sedation flashbacks, especially being an army nurse. It was always difficult to bring them round. Poor guy.

“He's tearing at his tail wound again.” Johns spoke softly into his comms, not wanting to distract the attention of the scared sea monster.

“See if you can block access to the wounds, prevent damage,” came advice down the comms

Nurse Johns put his hand in the gap.

Fogal’s flailing hand stopped, and his fingers wrapped around the nurse's hand.

Hey, Johns was holding hands with a vampiric seamonster of lore.

Wow.

The grip shifted slightly, and tightened.

And tightened more.

Nurse Johns was abruptly reminded that the sea monster’s grip strength was incredible, and how he would blindly reach for and grab anything, even when asleep.

“He has grabbed my hand and is holding really hard…”

“I will get muscle relaxant…” Dr Orange was beside him and pulling out a tiny bottle.

“Fogel, I really need you to relax, I need you to calm down right now, and let go of what you are holding…” The therapist took on a much harsher tone than normal, trying to use an authoritarian tone to get the dissociated merman to obey.

“Hurry.” Johns gritted out. He could feel the bones in his hand start to strain and he gritted his teeth to keep from screaming, “Doc, hurry.”

The pain was intense.

“Here, here…” Dr Orange was only a moment from injecting the relaxant into the merman’s muscle when a bone in Johns’ hand broke with an audible pop.

He rode out the pain that rose in a wave and tried not to faint on the spot. The grip increased for a moment longer, til finally relaxing, allowing Dr Orange to gently unpeel the sea monster’s fingers from Nurse’s crushed hand.

“Someone help Johns while I sedate Fogal.” Orange commanded.

He managed to stumble into the atrium, before the adrenaline ran out and he fainted into the arms of the other Nurse.

a/n I had wanted to do this since I first saw the prompt, but wanted to establish the characters first.

Shout out to my mam, who waited a whole 30 seconds after breaking her ankle to faint

[whumpingisfun]

Respect and Responsibility | 1 | Doorstep

TWs: dehumanization, pet whump (of the human variety), modern institutionalized slavery, fantasy whump, overuse of magical abilities, offscreen beating

Theo is a thief. He’s had sticky fingers since he was little. Shiny things hoarded away in his room. Silverware, coins found under the couch, chocolate. His mother had teased him about being a little dragon, and he supposes it’s true in a way. 

As he’d grown older, the shiny things he collected grew in value. 

But he’d never stolen a person before.

Okay. Back up, rewind. 

Theodoric de La Rosa is a thief. But even a thief has morals.

Theo had come to Rynthem’s capitol Zale for a heist. It was a simple one, something, something, wrongful inheritance, stolen from natives,something, something, the usual shit that a rich schmuck would do for something shiny, blah, blah, hoarding away relics that deserved to be with their culture and people where it would be properly used and kept safe, etcetera, etcetera.  

This time it was a painting. And a few statues. Masks? Lots of shit. 

Anyways, Theo had gone in for a painting. 

He’d done all the proper paperwork, gotten all the visas squared away. Juniper had done an amazing job giving him a proper cover as someone well off and in good standing. 

But the check in for Rynthem was… weird. The vibes were off. It made all of his long honed instincts rise up. 

Maybe it was the person who was also behind the checkpoint desk with the chipper customs agent who signed his passport. The blue collar cinched tightly around their pale neck, the artful way their bright sunshine yellow hair swooped over their bright blue eyes, looking like they had just stepped off a movie set. The way their smile was just, this side of fake. Almost plastic. Different from the cheerful customer service smile in that there was a sense if Theo tried to get them to have any expression other than the one painted on their face… it would crack their face wide open. 

“...I like your collar.” he compliments the person. “It’s a very pretty shade of blue.”

“Thank you, Mr. de La Rosa.” the customs agent smiles, widely, all teeth,  instead of the person Theo had addressed. 

It’s clear, in the flashing of the customs agent’s eyes, how the person standing at attention behind the customs agent looks down briefly, that Theo had misstepped. “I hope you enjoy your stay at Rynthem~” their voice is cold.

Theo clears his throat awkwardly, taking off his glasses and cleaning them. “You, uh. You have a nice day?” 

Theo didn’t know it at the time, but that was the first time he’d interacted with a Pet. It wouldn’t be the last, either. 

That vaguely off-putting sense just grew stronger as Theo entered Zale proper, leaving the hustle and bustle of the Transportation Hub Station. 

It wasn’t obvious. Of course it wouldn’t be obvious. It just was. 

It was the small things. How certain people followed others at just the shortest clip behind and to the right or left - presumably the dominant hand. The collars that Theo had first thought was just a fashion statement tightly cinched around certain people’s throats. Some even had leashes. 

Hybrids, people with brightly colored hair that would have looked unnatural on other people’s faces, all with collars, all of them just slightly off, too perfect. Uncannily so. 

Places in the restaurants with spots for a leash to be attached to, pillows to kneel on. 

Signs in shop windows saying ‘NO PETS ALLOWED’, and places where you would tie the leash to a post. All of them human, kneeling or standing in the designated area. Waiting. Some of them drinking out of small dishes as they waited in the dry Rynthian summer heat. 

What was horrible about it was that it was so normal.

It was so casual, that it took Theo ten minutes to realize that those were people that the signs referred to. It took someone exiting a store, with a collared person in tow, staggering under the immense weight of all the bags and boxes and totes. 

Too perfect, too shiny, too artificial. 

These people were slaves. 

These people were Pets.

Theo was sick in the next public trashcan and had to go find a medical mask in a convenience store after he’d been stared at for too long for doing something so ‘unseemly’. 

And then he spent the next ten to thirty minutes hyperventilating in an alleyway, because Pets were everywhere, tagging along with their owners, seemingly happy with their lives of servitude, eyes always plastered adoringly on their owners’ faces. 

He dials Juniper, despite the long distance charge and the risk factor.

“Juni I can’t do this.” 

“WHAT?!?? After all the extra effort it took to get you the proper clearance and identification?!” Juniper’s tinny voice echoes in Theo’s ears. 

“Juni, there are literal slaves here!” Theo’s voice shakes as he tries to keep his voice down. “There are slaves, and I can’t save any of them, and I get the feeling if I try anything, they’re going to make ME disappear.” 

He’d gotten the feeling from how he’d addressed the customs agent’s Pet. How he had misstepped and was on thin ice. The realization of the danger he was in was like a cold ice cube melding with the sweat prickling his body, dousing him in a terribly horrid polar plunge.

He was shivering. 

“--eo, Theo, my boy, listen to me.” The calm, assured voice of Theo’s dear mentor, Professor Hale, rolled deep into his ear. “Take a deep breath.” 

Oh. Right. Breathing. Breathing was a thing. 

Theo sucked in a deep shuddery breath and held it, counting to five.

“There’s a good lad.” Professor Hale murmurs. “Now, let me know when you’ve calmed down. You won’t retain anything if you panic.”

Right. Right. Panic was the archnemesis of a proper thief. 

Okay. Okay… shit it wasn’t okay -- but breathe. Breathe. Exhale for five… Inhale… hold, two, three, four, five… Cycling air in and out of the lungs in a measured fashion. 

Stinky trashcan. 

Theo’s eyes flicker around the alleyway, nose wrinkling under his glasses. 

Brick wall.

Really noisy neon sign.

Gravel and rocks poking me in the ass.

…why do I feel like I’m forgetting something.

OH RIGHT AIR--

Theo coughs as he sucks in a deep lungful of air. 

“You know, when I told you to breathe, I meant it, young man.” Professor Hale’s voice rumbles in his ear, slightly tinny from the connection.

“R-right--” he coughs, wheezing slightly as he swallows spit wrong. “Fuck!” 

“Swear jar.” 

“Damn it Hale, I’m in a situation!”

That gets a bark of laughter from the other side of the phone. It makes Theo smile, but it quickly fades.

“Professor, what am I going to do?” he asks helplessly. 

There’s a pause on the other side of the phone, and Theo can’t help but picture the concentrated look on the old man’s face as he considers his words carefully. 

“Theodoric, I want you to listen to me carefully.”

Theo straightens. Oh shit, full name coming out. “Yes sir.”

The smile is audible but strained in Professor Hale’s voice. “I want you to document everything you see carefully.” 

Theo swallows. “...you mean…”

“Yes. I believe the situation calls for it. I know it will leave you exhausted every day, but if you take some over the counter pain management, you should be fine.”

“You mean not debilitated by migraines and able to get the goal you sent me here for.” Theo cuts in.

Another pause. “...well, yes.” 

Theo sighs, rubbing his forehead as he sets his head back on the wall. “Okay.” 

There’s an audible scuffle of the phone being argued over quietly before Juniper audibly wins by elbowing Professor Hale in the gut.

“Theo I’m sorry, I should have looked harder at where you were going, I would have NEVER sent you there alone if I’d known--”

Theo sighs, eyes sliding shut. “And have you and the Professor at risk too?” he wearily asks. “No, its better if I’m the only one here. I’ll get in, and get out, and send the prize back to HQ as soon as I can. Just… if you guys don’t hear from me again, if things go wrong--”

“Don’t talk like that.” Juniper’s voice is breaking a little. “You’re gonna be fine, you’re gonna get home, and make us chili again. You hear me de La Rosa? You’re going to make me chili again, the really spicy one!” 

That gets a laugh out of Theo. “You just love me for my food, Juni.” he teases. He sucks in a steadying breath. “A-anyways. If I don’t make it back, make sure to look after Whiskers for me.” 

“I still can’t believe you named your cat Whiskers.” Juni sighs. “It’s like naming a baby Fingers.”

There’s a strangled choking noise on the other end of the line that doesn’t come from Juniper as Theo snorts and then starts to laugh hard enough tears begin to roll down his cheeks. 

“Sure, Juni. Next time I’ll let you name my cat.” Theo wheezes. “I love you guys. I’m so sorry about the bill.”

A soft sigh. “I’ll handle it, Theo.” the Professor’s voice is warm. Soothing. Theo can hear his shoulders loosen even oceans away just by hearing the old man’s voice. 

His eyes slide closed with a soft sigh. “Thank you, Professor. …I should get out of this alley.”

“Be safe, Larcine.” 

He straightens. 

“I will. Thank you Professor. You two stay safe, keep HQ running.” 

“Yes sir, Leader sir!” Juniper cackles and then the connection crackles shut. 

Leaving Theo alone, in a country run by the very thing he despised.

So, almost to present day. How about that heist. 

The target? Lord Harrison Carter’s summer mansion. 

Theo gets in as serving staff. New hire, sweet face, no one can resist his sweet face, and with the high pedigree and service record Juniper had forged, no one can resist his resume. 

He’s put in rotation. But there are whispers in the staff room after the noon tea is served. 

Lord Carter is getting a Pet.

Theo is practically invisible as he goes about the usual menial tasks the staff are wont to do. Cleaning. Tidying. Dusting. There’s a lot of dusting. Theo can’t see any spec of dust anytime he’s sent to do another round of dusting. 

If it weren’t for everyone doing the dusting, Theo would think he was being hazed. 

No, the hazing comes from a different angle. 

It’s his face that gets him in the most trouble. 

He’s pretty and he knows it. Flaunts it a little with the girls and the boys who swing that way, winking and generally getting a laugh out of everyone once it’s clear he’s just having fun and has no intentions to flirt his way into a bed. 

Despite him not having any intentions, it still gets him slammed up against one of the lockers in the changing rooms. 

Frankly, it gets him beat to hell and he staggers out of it, bleeding. He doesn’t remember much, after a certain point. There was the richly decorated hallway swimming in his eyes… and then nothing.

He wakes up in the hospital wing of the mansion. Bandaged and with a pounding headache he can feel through what must be a nice cocktail of pain medication because wow is he floaty. 

A man, who must be his temporary boss, sits at a chair by his bedside, reading a novel that Theo is too fucked up to read. Oh. Right. They broke his glasses. Damn. 

“Good morning Sir.” is what he tries to say. 

What comes out is a garbled, “Gurdmurnigir.” 

Larcine, one of the rising thieves in the underworld, reduced to incoherent mumbling. 

Great. 

“Mr. Rosa, you’re awake.” The man closes his book with a snap that makes Theo flinch. Ow. Motherfucker. 

Harrison Carter is a man who, in Theo’s drug addled and blunt mind, looks sick as fuck, and not in a good way. The man is frail, gaunt, with the same air of fragility that the Professor gets when it’s a bad day and the man feels all of his many years. Thinning brown hair frames his narrow, gaunt face and his cheekbones could cut glass. The only reason Carter isn’t as pale as a white sheet of paper, is because the man still has a healthy dose of melanin in him. 

His dark brown eyes are sharp, however. 

Sharp and cold. 

“Tell me, Mr. Rosa, who did this to you? I wish to have them… disciplined.” 

Theo swallows. “Hhhhow?” he chokes out.

A hand runs through his hair. It makes him shudder at the subtle intimacy of it. Like Theo is a kid sick at home. He doesn’t like it. This old man who’s probably in his fifties, maybe sixties is nowhere near his father. 

…despite having investigated Lord Harrison Carter on the outside, before heading in, the man doesn’t look a day over thirty, despite the sickness obviously ravaging the man’s body. 

Chills run up and down Theo’s spine. 

“Oh, you won’t have to worry about that, young man.” Carter says idly, playing with Theo’s hair. “Just let us good folk take care of it for you.” 

Theo stares blankly up at the man, and then just lets his eyes roll up in the back of his head. 

The next time he’s awake, he’s much more clear headed, and in much less pain. It’s a tiny little nurse on a large stool with big green owl-like eyes behind thick glasses who just stareeees at him quietly and makes notes in her little tablet before informing him that he is free to go home with two weeks of paid time off which - when she sees him about to refuse - is non-negotiable and the pay includes hazard compensation. 

“The culprits who have harmed you on Lord Carter’s property have been dealt with.” she informs him primly. “When you return from your rest, you will not have to worry.

Theo smiles a smile that’s only charming in how miserable and pathetic it is. “...thanks.”

He’s trying really hard not to think about what kind of punishment his current - temporary - employer had handed out.

She hands him his glasses. “Your eyeglasses have been repaired, free of charge.” she says. 

“...thanks.” He puts them on, instantly relaxing when his vision comes back into focus. No migraines. Thank Lupin.

He slowly sits himself up completely and limps out of the medical wing under his own power, and wishing that the generosity of the Lord he was working under didn’t come at a price.

There’s a box on the mansion’s doorstep. 

Theo stops, staring. 

There’s a box on the mansion’s doorstep.

It’s big. More of a crate than a simple package box. 

He turns back around. Hands fists by his side. He can’t risk the heist. The Lucine Guild had already promised the museums and families they would get their heritage back. He can’t. 

He can’t.

…

……

………

“Fucking damn it.” He turns around again, ripping off his glasses and this time, the world doesn’t go blurry, but instead sharpens. Every blade of neatly mowed grass stands out next to each other, sharpened into high definition as time unspools around him. It’s like walking through molasses. It’s like walking through air. The beat of his heart is his drum his drum his drum and he’s almost drunk from the heady beat it brings him. 

He watches himself move through time, a phantom. Separate from himself as he is now, decked in purple hues. He watches as he stops. He looks back. He looks forward again. And then time shatters in two. 

In blue hues, Theodoric de La Rosa goes on, never stopping. He nudges that timeline back into view as he grabs the box and wrestles it inside the haze. In that hazy, flickering timeline, the box disappears sometime later while the blue coated Theo is still walking, oblivious, visible on camera to be too far away to have even grabbed the gigantic box. 

Theo is sweating. 

His head is pounding. Vision swimming. 

He pulls and pulls the box even as his muscles burn.

He pulls and maneuvers this box, all the way through town, inch by grueling inch, his world completely coated in red hues. All the while, the specter of his blue self haunts him, blocks ahead, growing farther distant and as that distance grows, so does the pain in Theo’s head. 

The red world blurs until it is just Theo and the box. The box and Theo. Something warm and wet trickles down his neck. Down his chin. But he doesn’t have time to stop, and wipe away what must be blood from him overusing his Gift. 

If he lets go, time starts for the box, and Theo will lose his chance with so many people around to see the box suddenly appear. 

So inch by grueling inch, he pulls the box closer to that blue specter of a self that chose differently, of a self that Theo made real by forcing the timelines to behave as if only one choice had happened in a tree of choices. 

He gets the box into his apartment. His shielded and warded apartment. 

He lets go of the box, and with shaky fingers he shoves his glasses back on, sucking a deep ragged breath as he melds and slams into his other timeline’s self. The memories make him gag, as memories that are alien and foreign to him slide slick and oily into his mind. 

In another life Theodoric de La Rosa never stops to help another person. He steals and steals because of his own sense of greed. Alone--

 He collapses against the box, choking on bile, swallowing rapidly. His hands fumble with the mechanisms of the box, fumbling for the latch. 

The last thing he sees, as his blood soaked fingers hit the right mechanism, are wide gold eyes, rainbow hair and porcelain white skin, half in shadow as the box opens like unspooling origami. 

And then he is enveloped in darkness once again.

[set-phasers-to-whump]

Day 7: Post a link to your favorite whump fic of all time (or reblog it and/or make a list of them!)

ok i decided to limit myself to just 10 of my all time favorite whump fics. these are ones that i return to all the time, that i reread whenever i'm having a bad day, you know the vibe. all of them are very dear to me and i hope someone else will enjoy them too!!! i'll put them under a readmore since this got a bit long :)

Caged by Cargo - 911. Cargo is one of my absolute favorite writers and i've been in love with this fic for a longass time. the emotions and caretaking are absolutely top tier, and there's a lovely blend of emotional and physical whump. summary: "As Eddie stands in his kitchen after returning home from tonight's fight, he finally cracks. He starts falling apart and he knows there's only one person in the entire world he trusts to pick up the pieces. It's why he's dialling Buck's number before he even knows he has his phone in his hands."

Bloodshot Soul by OrionLady - bourne series. this one straight up has made me cry i can't even lie. it's a beautiful and very genuine exploration of the characters and the emotional whump is wonderfully painful. summary: "He cannot fathom why a crusty old skipper would care so much about a strange John Doe he fished out of the water, why he would smile and touch his shoulder and feed him pie. Then again, there are many things he doesn’t understand yet. The closer he and Giancarlo get, the less he wants to remember. An exploration into Jason and Giancarlo’s friendship during his two weeks aboard the fishing trawler."

In The Shadows of The Night by MissCrazyWriter321 - grimm. this fic is thee one that i turn to whenever i'm feeling sad. i love nick and rosalee's dynamic and this fic lets nick break down while keeping both of them perfectly in character. i'm absolutely obsessed with it. summary: "A board creeks beneath her foot, and he startles, but calms quickly when he sees her. “Sorry,” she murmurs. “I hope I didn’t wake you.” Obviously she didn’t, but she needs to be careful how she handles this. If she pushes too hard, he’ll just end up shutting down."

Eggs Two Ways by leslielol - law and order svu. something about the writing style in this one absolutely captivates me. like, there was a period of time where i straight up read this fic once a week and i'm not kidding. they're both super in character and it's a delightful read! summary: "It’s not often Barba has a reason to exercise a set of skills separate from those as a prosecutor. While sat in a holding cell nursing a broken nose, Carisi learns he’s as sharp as ever. (A missing-scene fic from 16x15 “Undercover Mother.”)"

Breaking all the things I'd wish to keep and Can't erase, can't rewind by Elisexyz - the man from uncle. ok yeah this is technically two. sue me. ely is like, my favorite fic author ever and i love all of her tmfu stuff, but these two hold a special place in my heart and make me go absolutely crazy every time (they go together btw). if you're into tmfu and for some reason haven't read her fics then uhh. get on that right now bc she's amazing. summary: "Napoleon maintains that attempted murder cannot be classified as an "accident"."// "“I didn’t think it was him.”"

the moon points to the sun by haloud - roswell new mexico. this fic has been making me insane for literal years. it's emotional whump and has a somewhat different vibe to the other fics on this list, but i absolutely adore it. this writer understands the characters so well and their style is absolutely incredible. top tier fic right here. summary: "They don't do apologies, Max and Michael. If they started, they'd never stop."

No Rules, No Winners by April_Valentine - person of interest. this is one of those times where you watch something and you're like 'man i wish they'd addressed this pain in the show' and then you find the absolute perfect fic that does address it. it's so tender and lovely and exactly what the episode was missing. summary: "Set just before the tag of "Baby Blue." After leaving Moretti's safe house, Reese goes back to the library."

The Car Accident by Tipper - sneaky pete. another one i've been obsessed with for literal years. it's on the longer side but it's so good, wonderful family dynamics and a really excellent storyline. summary: "After Julia found out who he was, all Marius wanted was one more Sunday night dinner with the family. It was a mistake. The trusting way they looked at him, the uncertain way she looked at him.... He left early, afraid to sink any deeper. The black truck came out of nowhere as he drove away..."

Too Hot (Hot Damn) by WasteTimeandType - the man from uncle. i loveee some heat exhaustion fics and this one is so good! i reread it recently when i was sick and miserable and seeing illya much more sick and miserable than i was really made me feel better lol. summary: "'Out of all the UNCLE missions, this was by far the worst. He’d been shot, stabbed, tortured with water and forced to run miles in a forest in the middle of Canada. All of that was preferable to this. The damn heat.' Illya suffers from heat exhaustion and Gaby and Napoleon take care of him. Kink Meme fill."

A Little Tender Care by ArgylePirateWD - person of interest. this one's a sickfic, i read it before i actually started watching the show and absolutely adored it, and i still adore it now. true to the title, it's super tender and soft and it's a really sweet read. summary: "The Man in the Suit doesn't usually take sick days. Usually."

and that's 10!! this is far from a complete list of all the fics i adore, but these are the first 10 (or 11) that i knew i needed to rec. if anyone wants more recs, lmk, i've got tons :)

[britcision]

Mooooore Dragon Age Inquisition Crimes!

Should I be working on the serious part so I can yeet this self indulgent nonsense onto AO3 where the partner @ekwolfwood can peruse it as his leisure?

Yes

Am I doing that?

No

What am I doing? Silly bs, snippets, and extremely gently whumping his best boy! So he’s not gonna mind

Gonna whump him for real later when Corin is not around to be the adult 😈

Today’s is based on a very real in game occurrence where our good boy somehow wound up 8 stories deep into the storm coast cliffs, alone in the dark, surrounded by spiders

But this time he doesn’t find his way back

Featuring:

Lluciano Lavellan, team dumbass who forgets he goes invisible before accidentally teleporting out of the battle (he/him)

Corin Cadash, extremely reluctantly the responsible one only because no one else is taking the job (they/them)

—————————

Spiders

The cave was dark, all angular pillars of rock broken off at different points to make a floor and ceiling. No natural light this deep into the earth, and precious few torches.

Lavellan wasn’t sure how far he’d left the others behind, but he really hoped they’d be catching up soon.

He’d been relying on the lights the others carried as they delved deeper under the cliffs, and Vivienne’s spells.

But at some point he’d stepped off the edge of a taller ledge than he’d thought, or turned a corner, and now he couldn’t see anything. Except the spiders.

They’d come to these damn cliffs to hunt spiders of all things, and gather their silk for the requisitions officer. And, well, he’d found lots of spiders.

Lots. And lots. Of spiders. The big ones. The ones that came up to his waist, and he could stick a dagger in to the hilt and not have it come out the other side.

He knew; he’d tried it.

That had been bad enough before too, with Vivienne’s magic freezing and stunning them, and the Iron Bull charging in with his massive warhammer.

Cadash had finished it just before they’d left, and it was the perfect weapon for spider smashing.

Being practically dripping with spider guts also wasn’t helping his mood per se, but it was a distant second place to being alone in the dark, surrounded by spiders.

Every time he thought he’d killed the last one, he’d turn around and another would lunge out of the darkness.

Surely he should at least be able to hear them behind him.

Cadash wouldn’t leave him unsupervised.

There still wasn’t even a glimmer of light.

“CORIN!”

**

“Why the hell are we gathering fucking spider parts anyway?” Cadash growled, wrenching their axe out of another scuttling corpse.

Still not quite happy with the weight on it. Might go back to the mace when they got back to camp.

Vivienne let out a tinkling laugh behind them, a direct counter to the burst of chain lightning that pierced another two darkspawn and a spider.

“Darling, this was your idea. Don’t you know?” She asked archly, quick on her feet as she surveyed the area and planned her next attack.

Corin grunted and slammed the bottom of their shield down onto a darkspawn tail, knocking the damn thing back and into a wall before Varric put half a dozen arrows into it.

“Look, they tell me what they need, we go find it. I don’t try and remember why,” they grumbled, kicking at a spider corpse when it seemed they’d cleared the immediate area.

That meant it was time for looting.

The Iron Bull was already elbow deep in one of the spider’s guts, pulling out a throbbing gland with every sign of enjoyment. Varric had finished rewinding Bianca and begun wandering through the others, poking at likely bodies.

“They want the ichor to make antivenoms. Not everyone has a big strong qunari warrior to hide behind,” he added with a cheerful nod to Bull.

Bull grinned and flexed, utterly uncaring of the ooze spilling from the gland in his fist.

“Thedas can barely handle one of me,” he boasted proudly, then tossed the gland at Cadash. “One more for the bag.”

The gland splatted against their armour, falling to the floor as Corin looked around, frowning. Counting their friends once more for good measure.

“Where the fuck did Lluciano get to?” They asked into the sudden silence.

Vivienne glanced around, the tiniest frown crinkling her brow.

“Now don’t be a mother hen, dear. Surely we’d have noticed him going anywhere,” she said carefully, her staff glowing brighter to illuminate the cavern.

Not exactly as unconcerned as she pretended. Maybe for good reason; more than half the Inquisition considered Lluciano Lavellan to be Corin’s moral compass and impulse control, rolled into one.

Varric didn’t bother pretending, checking Bianca’s fresh bolt and safety catch and looking around too.

“With that invisibility thing he can do? I’m damn good at not being seen, but the kid’s unnatural. I lose track of him more often than not, and none of you are as good as me.”

It was the kind of comment Vivienne loved to argue with, with some prim noise of doubt or sly comment. The fact that she didn’t only highlighted her worry.

No fucking way they were splitting up to search down here; this deep in the caverns if they lost one another, they were more likely to fall through the world than find daylight again.

And no need to duplicate the original damn problem which came from splitting the party anyway.

Corin was about to call them to search when a faint noise echoed down the tunnels.

The Iron Bull turned after it like a hunting hound, eye narrowed before he charged.

“That’s him!” He called, stomping over darkspawn and spider corpses alike. But they probably had plenty of ichor now.

“Definitely a voice,” Varric agreed more half heartedly, but he hurried after Bull nonetheless, Vivienne and Cadash hot on his heels.

The tunnel went down a little further, curving under the rock and then the Iron Bull leapt and disappeared completely. Varric slammed into the wall to avoid following him, swearing loudly.

Cadash nearly hit Varric, and then Vivienne hurried to the top of a very steep ledge and held her staff out over the edge.

Bull had found Lluciano alright, and was currently pouring a potion into his mouth.

Their elf friend looked like hell; dripping with ichor more than any of the other four, battered and scraped, and surrounded by nearly as many corpses as they’d handled in the cave above.

Even with cuts healing as they watched he was pale, exhaustion clear in the way he sagged into Bull’s chest as he finished the potion.

“Last one too,” the Iron Bull noted, glancing up at Corin as his arm tightened on Lavellan, “think it’s time we head back.”

He didn’t usually make tactical calls unless asked, eager to keep the hierarchy between himself and the Inquisition as clear as possible. They ordered Bull, Bull ordered the Chargers.

This was more a statement of the obvious and Corin didn’t bother agreeing, frowning down the drop. Most of the sheer columns that made up the cliff had broken cleanly, leaving little to climb.

The drop was more than twice Lluciano’s height, and worse for the dwarves. Getting the two out would be problem number one. Bull could do it, but preferably not carrying someone.

“Varric, if we both lie over the edge and reach down Bull can pass Luci up first, then all three of us can be ready to help him. Vivienne, a little mood lighting and an eye out for trouble?”

“Of course,” Vivienne agreed, too poised to show her relief but amused enough they all heard it. Her staff flared, sending the shadows (and what was in them) scurrying away.

“I can make it,” Lluciano argued, already struggling as Bull shuffled him into position to lift, “I’m-”

“Short for an elf, and this is tall for qunari, so be a good boy and stand on my shoulders,” Bull ordered, hoisting him as he stood.

Cheeks flushing, Lluciano shut up and let himself be manhandled.

Setting the axe aside, Corin heaved out a sigh as Varric came to join them on the edge of the ledge, both lying on their front.

“I’m making a fucking bell for that boy,” they grumbled as they settled. Varric snickered from beside them and Vivienne laughed, bracing a foot in the small of Cadash’s back to keep them steady.

“Perhaps a leash?” She offered innocently, and Lluciano huffed a laugh of his own, scrambling his hands up the wall until he could reach their outstretched hands.

“Don’t threaten me with a good time, Vivienne,” he teased back, still a little wan for Corin’s liking even after the potion. Still didn’t weigh a damn thing though, and between them the dwarves hauled him up the last few feet.

Then shuffled apart, Cadash nodding to the space between them.

“C’mon Luci, same for Bull,” they commanded, and Lluciano enthusiastically threw himself flat, despite all physical injuries.

Yeah, Corin was sloshing him down with a bucket when they got back to camp and checking for infections. Anything a potion didn’t manage to close didn’t need extra help, and Lavellan never bloody mentioned when he was hurting.

Below the Iron Bull chuckled, cracking his neck and taking a few steps back from the wall, gauging the distance thoughtfully.

“Don’t strain your tender back on me, boss,” he chuckled, checking one last time for any magically appearing footholds.

“If I pull it, I’d rather you be up here to carry me home anyway,” Cadash shot back, slapping the wall beneath them.

“But by all means, feel free to show off,” Varric added quickly, giving Bull one of his charming smiles. The qunari snorted a laugh, backed up, and took a running leap.

He damn near cleared the whole thing, getting to waist height where Corin and Varric grabbed onto his belt to pull him the rest of the way, Lluciano almost wrapping him in a hug.

Even Vivienne stepped in, reaching over them all to take his hand and guide him delicately to step between the three.

“Impressed?” Bull asked hopefully, waggling his eyebrows as he moved away from the ledge for the others to stand up.

Vivienne hummed noncommittally and his face fell, the light fading back to its previous levels as she turned to walk back up the tunnel.

“Have you tried doing something impressive?” Cadash teased, rolling their shoulders and making a face. Lofty claims or not, they’d feel that for the rest of the day.

Probably worse by morning.

The Iron Bull rounded on them, good mood immediately restored by a new target.

“Well, I could certainly try tonight if you need your back fixed,” he offered with another suggestive waggle.

Corin gave him a cheery backhanded slap on the chest as they passed, gauntleted hand unerringly catching the nipple. It was one of the skills they’d had before any freaky Fade marks.

“Ask me again when we get back to camp. You good, Luci?” They asked the elf, bending to grab their axe and groaning as they straightened.

Lluciano nodded quickly, reaching back and patting his bag.

“I got a lot of spider parts. We should have all we’ll need,” he added hopefully, casting a distasteful glance at the cave around them.

“Not what they were asking, kid,” Varric sighed, patting him on the back as they trudged back to the surface, “but I’m sure we’ll see what you’re not telling us soon enough.”

**

The journey back to camp was less eventful than the way out, at least half because Lluciano stuck to the middle of the group and asked when he wanted to wander hither and yon for every elfroot he’d missed on the way down.

An improvement over his habit of randomly disappearing (sometimes literally) to wander up hills and behind rocks for herbs, but not one that was lightly to stick.

It did give the rest an idea of how he was doing, though they were all looking forward to the end of their long day. Even Vivienne was less pristine than usual, her tiredness showing only in a lack of complaints about the mess the rest of them were in.

The scouts watched with wide eyes as they reached the camp, the poor requisitions officer utterly speechless as Corin dropped their bag and Lluciano’s on the table.

“Should be all the ichor you need, anything you don’t send back to Adaar at Haven. Maybe we’ll go,” they added as an afterthought, brows furrowing.

“Heat some water, several buckets,” Vivienne commanded imperiously, gesturing to the soldiers who’d paused to watch their return.

“You’re not gonna get a full bath out here, first enchanter,” Varric teased, easing himself down to sit in front of the fire and unwinding Bianca.

Someone else could take the next problem to wander past camp; he was done.

“No, but you all need a wash and I thought you’d prefer it warm before I dumped it over your head,” Vivienne told him coolly, the soldiers already hurrying to comply.

Varric wasn’t going to argue with that, or with the Iron Bull thumping down beside him.

“I’d rather have a meal, an ale, and some company,” the qunari sighed, shooting a hopeful glance at Vivienne.

She pointedly pretended not to hear him.

“Wash first and I’ll cook something,” Corin offered, almost dropping their axe and grimacing as they fought spider gore out of the buckles of their armour, pointing at Lluciano before he could disappear, “and you’re staying where I can see you til I’m satisfied you’re all wrapped up.”

The elf pouted, shooting a longing look that was definitely at his tent, which was purely coincidentally directly behind the Iron Bull.

“I’m fine. I had a potion,” he argued half heartedly, but stopped moving anyway.

“You’ll have another,” Corin told him flatly, the requisitions officer already reaching into the supplies with a smile on her face, “and then we’re getting you cleaned and a poultice on anything still swelling.”

“I can take care of myself, Corin,” the elf whined, but it was a token protest and they all knew it. He gave the requisitions officer a small smile and drank the potion she offered without comment.

Corin snorted, tossing their greaves on top of their breastplate and dropping in front of the fire.

“Yeah, saw that today. You’ll be lucky if I let you out of my sight ever again, you’re a fucking trouble magnet,” they grumbled, beckoning him down beside them.

He obeyed, not solely because that put him between them and the Iron Bull, and gave his own gloves a disgusted look. The spider gore hadn’t exactly dried in the constant drizzle of the Storm Coast, but that didn’t help.

“What if we just burn these?” He asked only half joking and the Iron Bull snickered, clapping a hand on his shoulder.

“Oh, no need to waste ‘em, kid. Hows about I get you cleaned up and out of those leathers so Cadash can make us something that doesn’t taste a month past its prime?” He offered with his usual lecherous appreciation.

Lluciano flushed cherry red in all the spots not streaked with gore, but before he could voice his hearty approval Vivienne made good on her threat and dumped a bucket over them both.

“As delightful a show as I’m sure you’d make, nothing is going anywhere interesting while you’re both dripping it spider gore,” she told them both in no nonsense terms, setting the bucket down upside down and sitting primly on it.

“Now Bull, you start with his feet while I attempt to get some of this out of his hair. Unless you’d rather I shave it and save the time?”

Lluciano stifled a yelp, hands jumping to his cropped red hair, eyes darting back to Bull for another second.

“No! No thank you, Vivienne, I can wash it myself if it’s too much trouble!” He rushed to assure her, tripping over his words.

The Iron Bull liked redheads.

And being told what to do by beautiful, powerful women, even if they were mages. He accepted a warmed bucket with good grace, scrubbing at his face with one hand to clear some of the muck.

“No problem, ma’am. And Luci, you tell us if something hurts or you’ve any injuries that still need seeing to,” he told the elf firmly, decidedly enjoying the way it made him squirm.

“I’m fine, really,” Lavellan protested one more time, glancing at Cadash from the corner of his eye.

Cadash had their head in a bucket, both hands busy scrubbing gore from their short brown hair. They surfaced a moment later and scrubbed their face clean much the same way the Iron Bull had, sighing contentedly.

“Right. Are you going to behave for Bull and Vivienne, or am I washing you down myself?” They asked firmly, dipping their hands back in the water to wash.

Before he could answer, Vivienne gave him a gentle but firm tap on the head, another bucket of water held between her knees.

“He is going to behave for us, because he doesn’t want to see what will happen if I don’t get at least one edible meal in a day. These rations are all well and good for playing soldier, but magic requires real food and I come with you on these jaunts from the goodness of my heart,” she declared firmly, her expression daring him to argue.

Lluciano sagged, head bowing forwards until she put a single finger on his brow to guide him backwards into her bucket.

“Yes ma’am,” he grumbled, eyes shut rather than meeting her gaze as she got to work on his hair.

Across the fire, Varric had already acquired himself a mug of something that he raised in a toast.

“Hell, if Corin’s cooking I’ll go see if I can’t find something to shoot. I’m sure no one in camp will object to fresh meat,” he offered, glancing around at their audience.

Who probably hadn’t seen a Herald of Andraste stripped and bathed before, but that’d change soon.

Before he could wind Bianca though, the requisitions officer stepped forwards again, a slight smile on her face.

“Actually, scout Harding went out when she heard you were on your way back. I doubt she’ll be long.”

“Harding!” Varric cheered, throwing his hands into the air and settling back into his seat. “Our own little guiding angel. Anything else you’ll need, Corin?”

Fighting a smile, Cadash forced themself back to their feet and began to stretch, groaning as aching muscles creaked. Sitting down at all had been a bad idea, but better to remedy it now.

“I’ll do a stew. Easiest way to feed everyone, and the pot’s big enough. What do you have that’s fresh?” They asked the requisitions officer, turning to follow them to the stores.

“There’s vegetables in my bag!” Lluciano called, but wisely did not try to move from his new place pinned between Vivienne and the Iron Bull.

Bull had gotten his boots and socks off already, and was checking the small remaining cuts along his lower legs. Totally unnecessary in Lluciano’s opinion, but.

Well.

He was being manhandled. He wasn’t going to argue that part.

And that was just another perk of having the Heralds around, however temporarily. Not only could Cadash cook, Lavellan knew every herb and spice in Fereldan, and picked every one he saw.

Most of the edible plants too, though on his own he’d just eat them raw. He could supply a scout camp easily with enough to make rations not only edible but tasty, just from his own pack.

Not even notice the loss by the time he moved on, because he’d have harvested everything in the area before he left. And while he moved through.

It wasn’t that the heralds’ parties were better supplied by the Inquisition. It was that they supplied a reasonable chunk of it personally, all four being hopeless fucking packrats.

Which just might have been a factor in the rising personal loyalty from their soldiers and scouts especially.

Settling back to tend the fire, Varric watched Cadash move off with their requisitions officer, then Lluciano being interrogated by Vivienne about how much blood was washing out of his hair.

Some self preservation might have been nice though.

———————

No one told Luci until the next day that he’d been gathering the wrong thing from the spiders. Luckily he was wearing more than enough ichor not to need to go back out 😏

And hey, the silk was also useful eventually

EDIT: BEHOLD! The masterpost!

[busterheadspace]

Let's see some Ron and some good ol' self-harm

Catholic guilt dun fucked him up, man

I’m getting to request. The other two Whump request are coming soon. Midway done

Note: I’m open to request. Just No readers. Send an ask. Bad Thinhs Happen Bingo also open. Click on my profile

—-

A man stepped out of the bus and began walking through the streets toward his home. He looked around as people in the Washington DC to go about their evening happily. To many people, the late evening was a great time. It meant free time, getting off work or school, going on dates, enjoying time with family. To a man who was wearing a blazer and a purple tie with a golden eye on it, it was just a time period of bad memories replaying in his head.

Ron watched a group of teens skate. His eyes follow as the group laugh and enjoy the presences of each other. Part of him desired people like that. People who want to work for him. People who want to stay with him. Someone who doesn't think he’s an asshole on his first impression. 

A happy family walked by him. A bit of sadness creeped in his heart. When was the last time he heard from his parents? Years ago after he went home for college break. He got wrapped up in the whole conspiracy theory thing. His parents didn’t like it at all. He had stopped attending church and they thought he was wasting his time on things that weren’t with the lord. They had a big fight during that break and Ron went back to his dorm. He tried calling them to apologize the next day but his number was blocked. Despite how bad the relationship had gotten, he cared about them. He remembered not sleeping and bring wracked with guilt as he cried in bed 

He made it onto his street and to his home. He opened the door and sighed. Kicking his shoes, Ron sat on the couch and opened his phone. For some reason, he went to take photos to find a certain image. A picture of young him standing next to Jesus on a cross. 

Church was something Ron didn’t like thinking about. As a kid, he was confused and nervous about what they taught him. 

“God is always watching everything you do. He would decide whether you were going to Hell.” It made young him think about everything he did would send him to hell. Stepping on a ladybug at six, stealing gum from a store, not rewinding his favorite movie on the VHS TAPE. He couldn’t sleep at night thinking he would do something wrong and he would be sent to the deepest burning parts of hell.

His eyes moved to Jesus. He died for all their sins and look at what Ron was doing. He was scrambling with people's minds, being a cold stone asshole, and doing careless amounts of sins that would send him to hell. The last part, he didn’t even get why he was so upset about. He was an ex catholic now, why should he care.

A hand goes into the inner pocket of his blazer, pulling out a pocket knife. He carried it around in case someone attacked him. He rolled his sleeve up, the knife just above his skin. Something in him yelled at him to cut it. That it would get rid of the sins and guilt he had.

His hand shook as he pressed the sharp edge to his skin. Blood came out of the small cut. It felt.. better. All the emotions and guilt came out as he did another cut. And another. And another. Until he felt it drip on his pants. 

Ron looked at fresh cuts on his arms. He let out a few pathetic laughs, shaking his head. A few tears rolled down his cheeks as he sighed. He leaves the knife on the table before heading to the bathroom to finally shower. 

He got into the shower after stripping off. The wounds stung and the water turned red. That felt like nothing compared to what he did to all those poor people but at least he got a taste of his own medicine. 

Maybe Ron should use the knife more..