#whoops i word vomited

[mezzy303]

So I've been rereading skip beat from the beginning for the first time in uhhhhh almost 10 years and I'm going inSaNE over characterizations and development that I have to write it down

At this point I'm only at the Heel siblings arc so I haven't gotten to the Guam or Saena arcs which are very big for Kyoko and Ren's character development and healing which I haven't reread since those chapters came out

Can we just take a moment to appreciate Nakamura for basing Kyoko and Ren's childhood struggles and trauma on very real things that aren't often, if at all, dealt with in anime/manga and also writing them with utmost care (Not only do the traumas inform their personalities, but their healing arcs aren't just a one and done thing!! It's a very slow process) Like starting with Kyoko, her single mother neglected her so much that she was raised by a family friend. On top of that, nothing Kyoko did was ever good enough for her mother, and both of these things are so apparent in Kyoko's character. She attaches herself to fairytales and magic as an escapism and because she relates to stories like Cinderella. She literally cannot function if she messes up and no one criticizes her. She can't properly acknowledge her own talents and beauty without it being attached somehow to fairytales; she never quite believes shes good enough. Similarly, she didn't want to bother anyone with her troubles, so she always dealt with them alone/in private spaces. Pretty sure she also has lowkey abandonment issues. And this is all parental trauma!! Things she already has before the series starts and she gets so utterly heartbroken she swears off romantic love entirely so she can never get hurt the same way again.

(I don't think I'll ever get over how Kyoko told all this to Kuu and he was literally like I'm adopting you. Your mine now. Sorry I don't make the rules ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ And Kuu going home to his wife like hey we got a new kid 😂 Like Kyoko freezing up when she made mistakes and then Kuu showing her love instead of reprimanding her makes me go 🥹😩💖✨😭💝 Kyoko getting all fluffy from head pats🥹🥹 But on the downside she literally can't bring herself to call him dad unless she's in acting mode sjdfhsf)

When I really consider it, I wonder if Kyoko really loved Sho as a person or like.... the idea of him. Like he was just a convenient guy via proximity bc Kyoko needed someone to be her "prince". We haven't been shown exactly why she fell in love, but it would explain why she stuck with dedicating herself to him despite his terrible personality and knowing he never saw her the same way. It's portrayed like the concept of hatsukoi in anime where its ✨pure✨and innocent✨It seems very idealistic. Whereas Kyoko's love for Ren is more mature. She sees every aspect of Ren and doesn't sugarcoat it, she sees him as he is (she does him up on a pedestal but partially bc she admires him but also as an extreme measure to protect her heart and hide her feelings imo)

And REN. trauma to the max. He had to deal with the hardships of making a name for himself when his parents are already famous, extreme racism from being biracial, his friend/mentor dying from an accident he unintentionally caused???? Like boy hates himself so much he's literally disassociating 24/7 he needs a fucking therapist. I get how being Ren has helped him in some capacity but he needs a professional asap. Though deep diving into this is so interesting because Ren/Kuon compartmentalized his issues and the parts that he hates about himself so much he created its own persona ("Dark Kuon"), to the point he's rarely ever just himself. And he buried it so deep that as soon as he cracked the lid open, those emotions just spilled out. He can't even allow himself to be happy, and when he does feel truly happy, his automatic response is acting nonchalant,,,,,,,,,,,, he didn't even realize he was doing it at first 😢

Also the symbolism with Ren's watch makes me go a little feral. I don't remember if it's originally his or Rick's but it obviously stopped when the latter died and Ren keeps it as a reminder of what happened and why he went to Japan. It's a weird item since it grounds him but also represents his heavy trauma, and I think having those two things in one kinda showcases Ren's unhealthy coping mechanisms (like grounding himself to something traumatic isn't... great...). But that scene where he realizes he took it off and he has a moment of whether it to keep it on as Cain Heel or not??? *clenches fist* it was so good. (To recap it, he had his watch so he wouldn't lose himself in the role of BJ and then forgot it in the bathroom after an unexpected trauma response) Ren narrates his thoughts as choosing between Rick or Kyoko but interpreting this, he's choosing whether to keep himself stuck in his past trauma or move forward and let himself be happy AKA stick with unhealthy coping mechanisms vs try something healthy and rely on people he trusts. Kyoko essentially becomes someone Ren grounds himself to 🥺 He still needs therapy though lmao. He's so mentally unstable in this arc,,,

As I'm writing this I'm seeing a parallel between Kyoko and Ren and how they both had an experience that completely and utterly broke them, and it was this that pushed them onto their current paths in showbiz. And they likely would never have met each other again if those things never happened (they had to lose themselves to find each other?? 😭). It's so funny to me that Ren is all like ThEiR fAtEs ArE iNtErTwInEd with Kyoko and Sho when you have to consider the fact that him and Kyoko meeting again was like. a chance in a billion. It was fate 😂

KyoRen is such a poetic ship to me. The fact that they're different people when they meet and don't recognize the other. How Ren starts falling in love AS SOON AS HE REALIZES KYOKO IS THE SAME GIRL HE MET (Ren being gray/demiromantic.... more at 5). Kyoko lowkey starting to crush on Ren when she witnesses a bit of his real personality. These two things happening around the same time??????? And Ren being SO afraid of being Kuon, his true self, because of his bad qualities, but Kyoko pulling out the good qualities without him fully realizing it?? (I'm 100% referring to Kuon being a mischievous little shit and I live for how he teases Kyoko) tbh they treat each other differently from other people without even realizing it lol. And Kyoko being surrounded by toxic and possessive men pursuing her, and Ren being anything BUT. Like my man is a gigantic green flag. He recognizes that he can't seriously pursue Kyoko bc she's a minor and he really tries his best to only be a friend and mentor in her life and keeping her trust and never crossing her boundaries despite the stereotypes of men being "unable to control themselves." Y'all take point this should be the standard at minimum☝️

I have to talk about Sho bc this boy is so fucking toxic but he makes such a fascinating character. As much as I hate how Kyoko got heartbroken in the way she did, I think it was necessary so that she could leave Sho's sorry ass and cut him out of her life. Seriously,,,, he took advantage of her and used her as a servant. she literally dropped out of school, moved to a different city, and took on two jobs for the sole purpose of helping his career and then he threw her away like a used rag (JUST THROW THE WHOLE MAN AWAY). And then he has the audacity to fall in love with her smh. Anyway the fascinating part about him to analyze is how he's so possessive of Kyoko. Like she was a mere fly in his life, but she was always his. Until she wasn't. And I think those twisted thoughts kinda morphed into feelings for Kyoko. Ig in a way he still cares about her, but it could never hide how toxic he is. Anyone who's like I don't care how this person thinks of me as long as I take up the biggest space in their heart is egotistical and narcissistic. BUT he and Kyoko bickering like siblings will always be funny. Like epitome of two people who've lived with each other for way too long so they know how the other ticks and also get on each other's nerves 😂😂Sho does makes a good foil for Ren though. Like he's basically everything Ren is not: immature, temperamental, possessive, vain, the list goes on. His only redeeming qualities as a character is providing good drama and humor and being an example of what Ren isn't.

Skip Beat is really a story about healing and learning to love yourself and letting others love you and Nakamura is such a good story teller 🥺

[karniss-bg3]

What do you think Kar'niss would do if he survives the death of the Absolute and all? With everything over and we'll say that he is by Tav's side until the end as well. Would he worship Tav as another kind of god/goddess, or... something else?

Hm this is an interesting question because there are so many variables at play. With the way Larian has structured the game it seems like all companions have the ability to shift toward good or evil. Of course I've not done a playthrough with Karlach, Wyll and Laezel in my party from start to finish but it's in the works. I know they can dip if Tav pisses them off too much but for the sake of ease, I'll just assume basic good versus evil. Act 3 spoilers head.

Good Ending: At first Kar'niss would've been very hesitant to join Tav and friends, likely even violent. It'd probably take a high persuasion roll to get him into your party. Tav just destroyed those he was loyal to, after all. The artifact could do well to block the tadpoles influence but Kar'niss' shattered mind is a different kettle of fish entirely. I imagine the first interactions with him would be aggressive and stand-offish. After all he was just ripped away from his new home and lost his "Queen". He's likely feeling disjointed, scared and a bit lonely without "Her" voice to bring him comfort. It'll be up to Tav to replace the Absolute's voice with their own. Not only that, but Tav could give Kar'niss healthy love and attention, help break through those years of abuse and build his confidence. It would be slow going because he has so little self worth and trust.

Then there is the matter of him being a drider. I don't think Kar'niss would want to stay in that shape, he likely longs to be a full drow again. That begs the question, does Tav find a way to transform him back or let him stay a drider? Since Tav controls the narrative it'll be up to them on if he switches back. To my knowledge the only way to undo a drider transformation is a wish spell which does exist in the BG3 universe. There could be other ways if Larian wanted to keep it simple but assuming Tav somehow finds someone with a spare wish spell then perhaps that is how he is changed back.

At the end, if Tav works toward this goal, Kar'niss would find more of his own voice. His confidence would grow and he'd learn to stand on his own rather than mindlessly following others at the drop of a hat. He'd be able to think critically and make choices not influenced by whispers in his ear. In other words, he'll -choose- to stay with Tav rather than feel he's obligated to. I don't think his mind will ever fully heal, it's taken too much damage to come back from the torture he's been through. Tav helps keep him grounded though, working with his short comings rather than against it. If Tav romances him then Kar'niss laments in the final cutscene: "When you found us--me, I was in a fog. My body moved as if controlled by magic, but I was not the one commanding it to do so. From the Underdark to Moonrise I played a pawn for the sake of someone else's power. I thought I was doing the right thing, I believed it in the very depths of my heart. They would've condemned me to death and, mind controlled as I was, I would've marched into the sword with my head held high. Not only do I owe my life, I owe my very mind to your aid. I was nearly forever lost, thank you for seeing more in me than an irredeemable monster. I want to remain by your side anywhere the winds take us. I love you."

Bad Ending: While not requested I figured I’d write it up for the sake of curiosity. It starts very similarly except Tav uses their tadpole to overwhelm Kar'niss with authority. Tav may even convince Kar'niss that they are the physical embodiment of the Absolute to keep his compliance throughout. Kar’niss is more agreeable at the start due to this, devout and eagerly awaiting commands. The more Tav chooses to cater to his psychosis rather than break him from it he becomes even more unhinged overtime. There may even be exchanges where Kar’niss seems to talk to himself and ignore Tav completely from time to time. He’s lost to the voices in his mind and the fervent beliefs that have followed him for sometime. When he does have moments of clarity his focus is on doing the Absolute’s will. It’s an obsession and he seems to want to talk about little else. Tav could romance Kar’niss during this time but something may feel off about the interaction. Kar’niss will worship Tav, do anything that is asked, but there is a sense that he is doing so out of blind devotion rather than true affection. It’s empty. His love is tainted by a belief and trust born from deception.

As their journey nears its end, Kar’niss’ mental state has declined to a point where his speech breaks in the middle of conversations. He may zone out and some of his party interactions out in the wild could cease altogether. He’ll refer to Tav as “Majesty” and little else. The perfect obedient pet. Assuming Tav goes with the ending to destroy the Absolute then that fogs up Kar’niss’ fate a bit. I don’t think the other endings allow a romance cutscene to play at the end but I could be wrong. I haven’t tackled them all just yet so I’ll stick with the tadpole annihilation ending here. Even though the tadpoles are gone Kar’niss’ mind is well and truly fucked. Any sense of self has been all but destroyed, leaving nothing behind but a temperamental fanatic in a worse state than Tav found him in. Any use of the word ‘I’ to refer to himself has dropped from his speech completely.

“Majesty, w-we survived. Have we done well? Our devotion is unending for you. Tell us where we shall go and it will be done. We have never known such bliss, such comfort. Our pledge to you will never falter so long as we still draw breath. You need more followers, an army fit for a God/Goddess, and we will provide it Majesty. Just...don’t forget about us. We are still your favorite, yes we are...no one else can love you like us. NO ONE ELSE! Our love for you knows no limits, we will give you everything you desire. We are ready to march by your side, to the ends of the world.”

These are just two of MANY possible outcomes for poor Kar’niss. I think Larian would make his bad ending tenfold worse than I could ever conceive and that will haunt my nightmares for sometime.

Sorry this is so long, my mind wouldn’t shut up. I hope this answers your question. Thanks for the ask!

[shima-draws]

Me, already planning out a full length complex AU: Oh no

[fredmundo]

okay so I saw this post from @loveyourownsmiilee (who i adore<3) and I just had to word vomit about eddie and red and blue and dates.

first eddie wears red on dates with ana and hot latina girl (i don't her name but she pretty). i think this is him trying to force himself into a box and meet the expectations that he puts on himself to find a romantic partner.

like i think he says something along the lines of "she's the type of person i should want to be with" about ana. which is not a good base for eddie to stand on. but eddie struggles a lot with expectation and pressure.

he goes on this date with this girl (hot latina girl -- i wanna know her name but i don't sorry) to please tia pepa and he knows from the first moment and before than that he just doesn't want to be there with her. he's wearing red and he's just performing.

with buck he wears blue. he doesn't have to perform he gets to just goof around and be himself with buck. he doesn't need to meet any expectations because buck just wants eddie to be himself and he gives eddie room to do that. so he wears blue with buck.

also eddie is wearing a red coat over a black shirt which just perfectly mirrors what buck wore to poker date night so like ????

----

now i wanna talk about buck and red. and how it connects to eddie and eddie's search for a romantic partner. eddie wears red because it's what he's looking for but can't quite find with these women. red is this unspoken requirement for eddie but it never works out when he's the red an dtrying to bring that to the table (because he's blue).

but buck is red. i mean there's buck wearing that red jacket with chris in the tsunami arcs and then he wears something similar talking about love and what love is. and then after the tsunami, he's wearing red when eddie practically gives him chris "there's no one i trust with my son more than you".

there's more instances of red for buck. but the point is still clear i hope.

eddie wears red on dates (with women) because he is always looking for what he has with buck. he is looking for buck on these dates. he is trying to perform and be someone he isn't because he has to hide when he isn't with buck.

basically something something eddie is blue and buck is red something something<3

[arbitrarygreay]

More evidence that Alder would have done gangbusters focusing on espionage: Petra notes in 2x4 that "Intelligence does often have a hard time keeping track of the General's comings and goings." Literally the person in charge of keeping track of information and shit says that Alder and her Biddies were giving them the slip all of the time over the decades. It's like the inverse of the Marshal being able to hunt anyone down, Alder is able to slip the leash when she wants. Which kind of goes against the popular fanon of Alder being stuck in meetings and in the unavoidable public eye all of the time, and finding it a burden. It turns out, Alder not only made a habit of getting around surveillance, but the other side of that coin is that what publicity/propaganda/speeching/posters/etc. she did do was of her own desire. If she didn't want to be a public face, she could choose to avoid it all. (To where when Nicte forced her into the Warding Circle and Petra appeared to make announcements with Silver instead, it was notable by everyone, a duty that Alder relinquished reluctantly.)

[keirawantstocry]

the rain is so lovely and loud anyone else in love with thunderstorms

[serenanymph]

nine people I'd like to get to know better

thanks for the tag, @mister-writes! gonna tag uhhh @writingamongther0ses, @faytelumos, @halfbit, @digitalsatyr23, @thatndginger, @aziz-reads, @toribookworm22, @scribbling-stardust and @e-klair (no pressure ofc!!)

last song: baumkuchen end by eve!

fav color: honestly I like most shades of blue but there isn't one that stands out in particular

last tv show/movie: I just started watching the pjo tv series today! I've only watched two eps but it's really good so far

spicy/sweet/savory?: I'd say sweet and savory are pretty evenly tied, but I have a low spice tolerance

relationship status: single

last thing I googled: is this in general or for writing? because the last thing I googled in general was about a game I was downloading, but for writing I think it might've been something about crows. I've been reading a lot about crows recently

[disturbnot]

ten great british pounds to the photoshop wizard who can fix the colouring on my psd god damn i cannot remember how i used to do this all the time

[lucithecrow]

I'm on chapter 50 of "Your majesty, please spare me this time" and honestly I'm coming to like it.

I still hate the dumbest fl, I don't think I'll ever like her. BUT that doesn't mean I don't understand her. Like I get why she's acting the way she is. Like she's really hateful of Rupert for what seems like no reason cause he's just a kid like her but think about Hitler, for example. If you were a victim of Hitlers awful-ness you would probably kill him as a baby, right? Even tho he is so sweet and innocent, he's just a child! You would still want to cause harm upon him bcs he fucked up urs and many others lives in such a horrible way.

I know this is a debate in itself but I think y'all get what I mean, right? It doesn't matter how small and tortured we know Rupert is, we can't help but hate him bcs we have this unreliable narration about how he murdered everyone for no reason. In reality, it could be a perfectly sane reason. I mean in today's standards it's fucked no matter what but back then u could get hung for talking shit soooo, he doesn't seem so bad now does he?

Whenever reading a comic set in the past like this it's important to put urself in the the shoes of someone living then, take a historical standpoint. We will never know if the author was thinking historically or if they're just a murderer but it makes u feel better, yeah? It makes you feel better to think that this is just what it was like. It doesn't mean it was right but it does mean that somethings aren't as bad as you make them seem.

Like in history class the teacher is like "and he was married to his cousin" u always go "ewww wtf" but that was so fucking normal depending on the timeline and the social class of those involved. Take a step back, take several steps back, to the point where you are no longer in 2023 but in the fucking 1900s or smth. Now does it seem so wrong? Not rlly.

Wow I rlly lost track there MY BAD- anyhow, remember the phrase "innocent until proven guilty" we don't know why Rupert killed the people he did (well unless you've read spoilers for some deaths, which I have hehe) sooo he's still a good person until we figure out he's not. This is a standpoint u can take as the READER, of course, but you should be able to understand this standpoint is not nearly as easy to take for (I forget her name omg) umm (ok I went back and read a bit to find her name lmao) Laliette as it is to us. Her, from her view, innocent family died at the hands of a tyrant who killed his family for no reason. Would you forgive him even if he was an innocent child? Yeah no

My bad I just word-vomited whoops but wtv bye

[jellojolteon]

Oh wow I have a um. Backlog in my inbox

[mnty-bubblegmyum]

i legit feel so sick thinking of how quickly your opinion on someone can change

[wildgeesedotpdf]

Well the thing about corpse desecration is that it is almost entirely self-serving. Keeping your boy bestie’s body in your tent after he was killed in battle may be done out of love, but you are denying him a proper burial (<- only matters in cultures where funerals are significant and seen as a necessity for someone to reach peace in an afterlife) to comfort your own grief. He can’t know you love him, he’s dead, so this act of devotion is more an act of possession than any sort of selfless love. But having him is comforting and if you don’t have him then you’re alone and there is nothing left to fuel the rage that defines you. Keeping his body to yourself is the closest thing to loving him you can do because he’s dead and you’re grieving and you can’t bury him yet because you still need him.

[javierpena-inatacvest]

hi Madeline! it’s me ready to annoy you with more javi THOTS

I know that man goes feral seeing you pregnant , especially when you start to show because everyone will know that HE made you that way and that you belong to HIM and it just makes him feel so primal and feral

Cassidy oh my GOD 😩😭 (y'all gotta stop doing this to me (pls actually don't), my baby fever is already so bad and this is not helping 💀) You are 100000% correct and now I can't get this out of my head and what was supposed to be a little drabble has decided to turn into a full blown thing WHOOPS

Insatiable

Summary: Javi thought he couldn't love you anymore than he already did- that was until the two of you found out you were expecting. Now that your baby bump is finally starting to show, Javi can't get enough of you.

Word Count: 3.7k

Pairing: Husband!Javier Peña x Pregnant Wife!Reader (no use of y/n)

Warnings: SMUT (18+), unprotected p in v (listen... she can't get pregnant if she's already pregnant soooooo), oral (f receiving), vaginal fingering, breeding kink (bc this man will keep you barefoot and pregnant as long as you let him), creampie, Javi is literally obsessed with you and is foaming at the mouth 24/7 watching you carry his baby, Javi is so excited to be a dad, Javi loving his cute lil family so much it makes me wanna vomit

A/N: Me: Damn, I need to write about something other than babies and breeding kinks. Also me: .... No. Don't mind me while I run laps in frantic circles and howl at the moon thinking about this because good lord, you know this man's breeding kink is an unstoppable force of nature

"What are you looking at?"

"Nothing."

"Well that look on your face definitely doesn't say nothing, Jav."

You couldn't help but giggle at the way Javi's eyes had been glued to you from the moment he had entered the kitchen, arms crossed over his chest and hip resting against the counter, admiring you like some sort of breathtaking piece of art as you worked on finishing up dinner.

Because truth be told, to him, that's what you were. Javi had no problem making it very clear to you that he was convinced you were the most beautiful woman to ever walk the face of this earth- beauty not just in the way that you appeared, but a beauty that came deep within your soul that had changed him in a way he would have never thought possible. A beauty that had given him a life he swore he would never deserve- that someway, somehow, you had wanted to spend the rest of your life loving him.

Even after over a year together, a new house, and a ring on your finger, Javi found himself falling harder and harder for you with every passing day. He was honestly convinced it was physically impossible to love you any more than he already did.

That was until four months ago, when the two of you found out that your love would no longer be spread between just the two of you- In a few months from now, it was soon going to be the three of you.

After watching you grow and carry his baby the past four months, Javi learned that despite all odds, he could love you more that he already thought possible.

"Your face says 'I'm thinking very dirty thoughts about my wife' or 'I'm really focusing on trying to hold in a fart' and if the second one's the case, I don't think it's very fair you still get to look that hot while you fart". You smirked, raising an eyebrow at Javi, reaching next to him to grab the dish towel you had been using to wipe your hands before mirroring his stance against the countertop.

"Luckily for you, it's not number two." Javi huffed, rolling his eyes at you before his gaze traveled down to your stomach.

Over the past few days, you had finally reached the point where you were starting to look pregnant, and not just like you had eaten 7 Thanksgiving dinners (as you lovingly liked to coin it). Your bump was now beginning to protrude out of your tighter fitting shirts, excited to see your belly starting to grow, giving your hand a new place to rest on top of the subtle curve, making you grin every time you placed it there.

You had also discovered that not only was Javi just excited about your adorable bump, your husband was ecstatic about it. Your pregnancy was now no longer the hardest secret he'd ever had to keep for the first 12 weeks of your baby's life, it was now an opportunity boast about the fact that you were his beautiful, pregnant wife, and that you and that baby were his.

At this point, there probably wasn't a soul in Laredo that didn't know you were pregnant, because everywhere Javi went, it was a chance to let anyone and everyone know he was going to be a dad, and you were the one carrying his baby.

"Hey, I have to leave our meeting early today because my wife has an ultrasound today for our baby."

"I know peanut butter and pickles is a weird combination, but my wife is pregnant, and what the baby wants, the baby gets."

"Just wanted to get the truck checked out since my wife and I have the baby to drive around in a few months."

And while maybe it was overkill, he just couldn't help it. There was something about becoming a dad, seeing you pregnant, knowing that he was the other half of your baby growing inside you that drove him absolutely feral.

If that gold, diamond band wrapped around your finger wasn't enough to prove that you were his, the baby he had put in your now barley bulging belly sure as fuck was.

Javi reached out his hand, fingers splayed across your stomach with an undeniable smile spread across his face as you rested your palm over his grasp, the two of you staring down stomach.

"Watchya thinkin' about, Jav?" You teased, speaking on behalf of both you and baby Peña as Javi stared at both his and your hands covering your bump, silently admiring the simple moment you were sharing.

"Can you believe we fucking made this?" Javi laughed quietly to himself, still in shock every time he really thought about how he was going to be a father. "That we're actually gonna have a baby?"

"Actually, I can, considering we were both there, and it was very fun." You giggled, lacing your fingers between Javi's and bringing his hand up to your mouth to plant a soft kiss on it, "It's crazy, Javi. I can't believe we're actually gonna be parents."

"Yeah? Fun, huh?" Javi smirked, bringing his other arm to wrap around your waist, fingers beginning to dig into your hips as he pulled you closer.

"Out of all the things I enjoy doing with you, Javier Peña, making babies is very high on that list."

Biting down on your lip, you leaned further into Javi's touch, your bump barley getting in the way of being chest to chest as he craned his neck down, engulfing your mouth in an electric kiss that had you feeling like you were floating.

"Fuck- I'd make 100 babies with you, Hermosa." Javi groaned, feeling the growing bulge in his pants starting to press against your thigh in between kisses.

"100?! Jesus, Jav, are we planning on running a circus?" You laughed, Javi too wrapped up in the thought of you carrying another one of his babies to even process your joke.

"I don't fuckin' care. I'll give you as many babies as you wanna have. You're so fucking sexy being pregnant."

Without your lips ever parting, Javi swung you around so that your back was pressed against the counter, caging your body under his before letting his kisses travel down your neck and collarbone, across your chest and south towards your stomach, until he was dropping to his knees in front of you.

"Javi, I've spent the past three months eating nothing but Hot Cheetos and pickles and complaining about how I need to throw up every thirty seconds, last time I checked, that's about as far from sexy as you can get." You tried your best to muster out some sort of laughter, but with the way that Javi was kissing you, letting his hands roam up to the waistband of your shorts, slowly beginning to tug your bottoms off your hips until you were in nothing but your underwear, Javi was making it very difficult to play into your joke.

Not that you were complaining.

"Nuh uh," Javi hummed, gently tracing his fingers over your covered folds, arousal seeping from your core into the dampening cotton, "Do you know how fucking sexy it is seeing you carry our baby? Knowing that you let me get you pregnant? Grow our kid and give us a family? Baby, if that's not the fucking sexiest thing I've ever heard, then I don't know what the fuck is."

Rubbing and forth, the pads of Javi's fingers applied more pressure to your clit, making you let out a whimper as he finally tended to the throbbing ache that had been rapidly building between your legs. At this point, your underwear was clinging to the outline of your cunt, swollen and puffy with anticipation as your slick soaked the fabric.

"Fuck, you're so wet for me already, baby girl." Javi tutted, hooking his fingers around the waistband of your panties and shuffling them down your legs, revealing the shiny mess smeared between your thighs from your weeping hole.

Scooting himself closer, Javi hooked one of your legs over his shoulder, wrapping his arm around your thigh to hold it in place and keep you balanced. His fingers slid through your folds, parting them with a V of his fingers to softly kiss your clit, big brown eyes looking up at you, pooling with lust as he watched you writhe under his touch.

"F-fuck, Javi, oh my god." You whined, noticing the shift in how your changing body and hormones made you even more responsive to Javi's touch, your pussy already beginning to clench around nothing with the way your stomach was swirling with arousal. "Please, baby, fuck."

"Please, what, Hermosa?" Javi smirked, peppering more soft kisses to your sensitive nub, knowingly driving you wild.

"T-touch me, baby, please. Please, don't fucking tease me, I just- Fuck-"

Before you could finish your plea, Javi had his head buried between your thighs, lapping you up like a man lost in the desert, finally finding his oasis. Long, flat strokes of his tongue swiped against your clit, already working at an unforgiving pace, ready to make you fall apart for him over and over.

Your hand shot down, digging your fingers through the thick, brown locks of Javi's hair, trying to find any way to brace yourself as an all too familiar tingle began to build in your spine as your sensitive bundle of nerves throbbed against his tongue.

You were convinced there wasn't a man on the face of this earth who loved eating you out more than Javi, riding a serotonin high every time he settled his mouth between your parted legs, worshiping your pussy until it wept for him like a dam finally breaking its seal and flooding him with your slick.

As if you weren't close enough already, Javi slid two of his fingers into your entrance bumping up perfectly against the sweet spot inside you, curling just enough to send you moments away from spiraling.

Without faltering his pace, Javi's lips latched around your clit, sucking intensely while his fingers pulsed at the perfect rhythm, feeling your pussy flutter around him.

"Fuckfuckfuckfuck!" You threw your head back, orgasm rushing through you forcing your cunt to clamp down around Javi's fingers, slick gushing around them. Javi's strong grip held your legs in place, trembling with pleasure as you came, letting you catch your breath as your chest heaved while you came down from your high.

Javi placed a soft kiss on your sensitive clit before tossing your legs off his shoulders to stand, hands cupping your jaw to lock your lips in a passionate kiss, the tangy taste of you still fresh on his tongue.

"Turn around, mi amor." Javi cooed, gently letting his hands down your body, running over the swell of your stomach until he reached your hips, guiding you to face the edge of the counter until your forearms were resting on the ledge, bare ass pressed against the bulge straining against the denim of his jeans.

You craned your neck over your shoulder to see Javi frantically working at his belt, metal quietly clanging until a swift tug had his pants and boxers pooled around his ankles. You let out an audible moan as you felt his tip swipe through your folds, collecting your arousal to coat his cock, stroking himself with the mix of your slick and his precum.

"Fuck, you're so perfect," Javi whispered, pressing a kiss onto your shoulder and trailing the pecks of his lips up your back and neck, "So fucking beautiful carrying our baby." One of your hands shot back, grabbing at Javi's waist to brace yourself as he pushed into your heat, shaft filling you up inch by inch until he had bottomed out, hips flushed with your ass.

The sweet stretch and sting of Javi's length had you reeling, your sensitivity from your last orgasm on top of the already increased sensitivity from new waves of hormones, jaw going slack at the sensation of his fullness, greedily pushing your ass back into him to take as much as you could.

"Move, baby, fuck- please," You whimpered, bracing yourself against the counter, grinding your bottom half into his hips to do anything to ease your ache, "Javi, fuck me baby, please, I- oh fuck-"

Before you could finish your plea, Javi was beginning to pound into you at an already punishing pace, punching into you g-spot in a way that made your eyes nearly roll in the back of your head.

"You want me to fuck you, Momma? I'll fuck you, hermosa. Whatever you want, baby, you know I'll give it to you." Javi smirked, fingers digging into the curve of where your hips meet the meat of your ass, thrusting into you with thick drags of his cock, intoxicated by the warmth and wetness of your velvety walls.

Releasing the grip of one of his hands, he wrapped it around your front, splayed as it slid down the curve of your belly to reach between your legs, rubbing firm circles into your clit.

You couldn't help but buck back into him, feeling your stomach swirl with arousal and anticipation of your impending orgasm beginning to build, the combination of the snap of Javi's hips and pressure against your sensitive nub making you feel like you were melting under his touch.

"Fuck, Javi- Fuck, oh my god. Fuck, you feel so good. Oh shit- don't stop, baby." You moaned, feeling your pussy starting to flutter around his cock as he continued to fuck into you, your borderline incoherent babbling only egging him on more as his thrusts became faster.

"I won't stop, pretty girl. I won't stop until I fuck you so full of me, you'll be dripping out of me for days. Fuck- I won't stop until give you as many fucking babies as you want." Javi grunted, gritting his teeth as he rammed into you, feeling the knot beginning to tighten in his own stomach at the thought alone of being able to get you pregnant again.

With his one hand still rubbing your clit, his other arm scooped around your front, pulling you from resting your weight on your forearms against the counter to have you stand up straight, your back flushed against his chest. With you pressed against him, Javi couldn't help but suck and nip at your pulse point, burying his face in the crook of your neck as he pulled you in closer, holding you steady while your body began to tremble on the brink collapse.

"I know you're close, baby. It's alright, mi amor, I've got you. Wanna feel you soak me. Cum all over my cock before I fill you up." Javi groaned, his words hot against your skin between kisses along your neck and shoulder blade, shifting his grasp to cup one of your swollen breasts in his palm, fingers gently toying with the hardened buds of your nipples.

The added sensation was all it took to send you over the edge, orgasm crashing through your body with an unforgiving wave of intensity, pleasure radiating through every inch of you as your cunt clamped down around Javi's cock, gushing with your arousal as you came.

Knowing you had reached your end, Javi began to chase his own high, his thrusts becoming sloppier and more erratic as your body melded with his, nearly going limp in his grasp from how good he had made you feel.

"That's my girl. Fuck, I can't wait to get you pregnant again, let everyone see how you're all mine carrying our baby. Gonna be such a good Mom, giving us a family, making me a dad. Oh fuck- I love you so much. So fucking much. Te am- ahhhhhh, fuck!"

Before he could finish his thought, Javi was spilling inside you, the hot ropes of his spend coating your walls, a low groan humming deep in his chest as he filled you with every last drop he had to give. Javi's body slumped into yours, his head resting on your shoulder as both of your chests rose and fell with heavy breaths, hearts racing in sync as you came down from your highs.

Carefully slipping his softening cock out of your heat, you could feel the mix of your spend smearing between your thighs and dripping down your legs as Javi grabbed your waist, turning you to face him so your mouths could meet in a still messy dance of tongues and teeth.

"Holy fuck..." You huffed, finally managing to get a word out through your breathlessness and giggles, looking up at Javi, blissed out grins stretched across both your faces.

"Holy fuck..." Javi parroted, the two of you happily giggling half naked in your kitchen, the both of you staring down at your stomach as Javi rested his hands to cradle your bump.

"This one's not even here yet, and you're already thinking about number two?" You snickered, raising an eyebrow at your husband, gently tracing circles with his thumb around your stomach.

"Huh?"

"Don't think I didn't hear what you said. Let's get this one first, then we can think about another one." You teased, giving Javi a little nudge as his cheeks flushed pink with embarrassment, sheepishly darting his eyes towards the ground.

"Sorry, I- I just, God, something about you being pregnant- drives me fucking crazy. I love both of you so fucking much, I swear." Javi sighed, soft smile spread between his cheeks, eyes glancing back and forth between your bump and equally happy grin stretched across your face.

"We love you too, Javi." Pressing up on your toes, you planted a soft kiss on Javi's cheek, draping your hand across his, resting happily on your stomach. "Listen, if you want baby number two, you gotta help me finish cookin' baby number one. And baby number one is hungry. Do we have anymore sour-"

"Sour gummy worms? I picked some more up on the way home from work yesterday."

"Oh thank God, I was about to go drive to the store pantsless to get some if we didn't. Fuck, I wonder if we still have-"

"Watermelon? Got that and green grapes too, just in case." Javi chuckled, pressing a gentle kiss into your messy hair.

"God, I love you." You beamed, making your way towards the pantry, "You keep this up and we're makin' baby number two on an expedited timeline there, Jav."

"Sour gummy worms and watermelon is all it's gonna take?"

"Like I really needed that much convincing anyways? I told you earlier, making babies with you is one of my favorite things to do. Sour gummy worms and watermelon is just a nice bonus."

Taglist:

@chaotic-iguana @rhoorl @bbiophiliaa @purpleprincess75 @angelofsmalldeath-codeine

@pedrobaby @fatima-marisa @beboldbebravethings @poodlebae @kittenlittle24

@3sriracha @jungchloee @perennialdoll247 @prettyinpunk85

@partyofone3413 @harriedandharassed @pedrohoe04 @theorganasolo

@endlessthxxghts @beware-my-thorns @missladym1981 @milly-louise

@jay-zzle @the-one-with-the-grey-color @persephone-girl @bitchesuntitled

@pedropascallvr @millennial-teenybopper @vee-bees-blog

@hopplessilse @mxtokko @its-nebuleuse @msmorningstaarr

@amyispxnk @honeyedmiller @mountainsandmayhem @picketniffler @burningnerdchild

@copperhalfcent @theoraekenslover @bloodyinspirationaldemon @vee-bees-blog

@samgirl4life @pigeonmama @survivingandenduring @itsokbbygrl @javierpena-inatacvestnotifs

@purpleprincess75

[sophiebaek]

So I must confess that the only footage of s3 I've seen is actually about 15 minutes of the season finale, and all of my intel of the season has been from mutuals online and video essays. I think the show is keeping Sophie's casting super tight lipped and they wouldn't just slide her in there like that: Pen has always been in the show, Phillip, John, and Micheala have all been formally introduced to us. I think we'll probably get a similar introduction to Sophie like Kate's in s2. If s4 is about Benophie, she's already been casted and they have started filming already! (Even though the odds seem like we're next...they've clowned us before so I won't assume we've got Sophie until it's explicitly stated that's her lol)

At this point, it's pretty safe to accept that the Cowpers are sub-ins for the Reillings; while I don't agree with this choice, from a production stand point this makes sense. They don't have to cast new people and can expand on a family we've known since s1. It would be interesting that Cressida's aunt could play the evil step-mother role and I see that as a possibility! Benedict's story was so refreshing to me because we spent a good majority in the country; Cressida already being there is very convenient. Why would they introduce us to her aunt, a new character like that if they didn't have some bigger role to play oh wait nvm...Uncle Featherington. During the season’s release I was actually thinking about Cressida and how she's been developed. In s1 she was clearly the mean girl that pestered Daphne and bullied Pen, but after s3 we've seen a different side to her. I always thought Cressida would sub in for Rosamond but now I think she's a good contender for Posy 🤯. We understand Cressida a bit more and from reactions, it seems people feel sorry for her based on her familial treatment (very similar to Posy). My crazy theory is that the Cowpers are cousins of the Gunningworths and Cressida will go to the countryside and meets her bastard cousin Sophie, who their aunt treats as a maid...with how much the show has deviated from the books, anything is possible at this point! I think this season we got a lot of hints about the inevitability of Benedict's story (and Sophie's entrance as Jess has stated) but not a clear confirmation of it being next. Yes, we got the masquerade comment but we also got a lot of development from other Bridgertons too. I think the show will give us at least one season with John so Francesca's season may come later (Also I don't think Shondaland and Netflix would gamble renewal with a Francesca season when she's basically a new character compared to Ben and Eloise who are strong fan favorites). With Eloise that's a wildcard...I simply do not know where they are going with her but it is very likely she could meet a certain someone on her way to Scotland and start writing letters to them next season. I did think it was odd we did not see Chris Fulton at all either in s3...he could just be working on Outlander or The Witcher but the show seems to be going out of it's way to include Phillip, so not even hearing of him this season was weird...

I'd say it's about 60% Ben's and 40% Eloise's time next season and my guess for leads are Ben (4), Fran (5), Eloise (6). I'm well aware of the Pall Mall foreshadowing but I think at this point JB does what she wants to do.

Wait... I just had a thought...

Care for some Sophie Beckett speculation?

I've seen some posts on Threads where people are speculating that the maid we get a glimpse of at the Cowper residence - the who Cressida asks for help from - might be Sophie. I couldn't remember who they were talking about, so I'm currently rewatching episodes 7 & 8. (Episode 7 is where we see the maid.)

And not to quash anyone's theories, because this truly is all just speculation, but the maid's performance just doesn't scream Sophie to me. In my mind I'd expect more timidness, stiffer, stilted speech, a more unhappy look on her face, and possibly a gaunt countenance. Maybe even fear or wariness the second Cressida asked her for help. Idk, I just don't think that was her.

BUT! Now I'm on epsiode 8, and just got to the part where we meet the Aunt come to take Cressida away to the countryside. And simply by her tone, remarks, and countenance we know this woman is a BITCH. Cressida's mother (remember, who is named Araminta) even remarks that she forgot how horrible a woman this aunt is. SO, what if the "Araminta from the books" character is kind of split into two: Araminta Cowper & this Aunt.

Sophie is still a bastard, Lord Cowper is her father, and he's pawned her off on his sister - the Aunt - to live out in the country where he doesn't have to deal/see her. Both Araminta & the Aunt know who Sophie really is and both hate her, but we need someone doling out some truly horrible treatment and that could fit the Aunt's personality.

This also gives Cressida more storyline, because truthfully I wasn't sure how they were going to bring Cressida back in after this season. BUT having Sophie at the Aunt's house gives Cressida plot out in the country that can also loop in Benedict & the Bridgerton's since this is obviously their stories. And as we all know, there is Benedict/Sophie plot out involving the countryside, so that helps too.

Idk, this all literally just popped into my head and now I'm word-vomiting it here. Anyone else see the plausibility? Thoughts?

Tagging some people, but anyone is free to comment! >> @silverhallow @tilly-tilly-2827 @sophiamariabeckett @queen-of-the-misfit-toys

[arbitrarygreay]

I'm back on my "defending Alder" bullshit, but to be fair, the show is on my side! Eliot says in After The Storm 2x6 that he retains empathy for Alder's decision making, that he is still Team Alder. That bears out in the writing for the show, in that we see all of the characters basically concede all of the points Alder made to justify herself. (And let's not even get into the potential consent ethics around the Mycelium making everyone witches. We'll allow that feel-good hand-wave.) Obviously, the most important characters to consider on who compromised are Tally, Petra, and Anacostia, the characters who had the most stake in condemning Alder's actions. Khalida, too, but her turn is already quite obvious. Tally, of course, made the call to kill Penelope, and then embraced receiving training from Nicte. Don't quite remember if she was present for Scylla controlling people with crows, but everyone else just accepted it, so I don't see her suddenly finding that a crossed line. Of the three, she does the least to concede Alder's points, but she's also quite far from being a part of military authority for most of the season, so. Anacostia murders Vira for Pushing Sterling, and then uses (Spree-specific!) Pushing herself to have the Camarilla surgeons murder each other. The only Spree tech Anacostia doesn't eventually use is the delayed-charge bottle/balloon burst. Petra, meanwhile, is subject to that old TV chestnut of "fuck Civilian Oversight" (second only to "we love prosecution attorneys, defense lawyers are scum"), and Petra doesn't even have the excuse of immediately necessary self-defense that Anacostia had. Preceding that, Petra had to sacrifice the conscripts in order to delay the Cession invasion (which, sidebar, mirrors the Battle of Juarez, where Jem Bellweather led a "disastrous" cover charge to give the Swythes time to create a storm). Not to mention that the show kind of hand-waves Willa's complaints against Petra's leadership in the field, though perhaps Petra's "they're killing my soldiers" moment in S3 was meant to be a contrast in attitude to that past. This all goes back to that campfire conversation in 1x10.

Tally: How are we any different from the Spree if we just puppet whoever gets in the way? Alder: Taking the body and will and voice of another is a violation. It is against our code. But I had no choice. If you knew what was at stake, you'd understand.

When we slice away the actions that everyone eventually shared with Alder, only a few unique transgressions remain: 1) The Liberian Martyrdom. Balanced by their kid-gloving of Nicte and Scylla having done way more of it. 2) Alder's puppeting and pushing of Wade. What differentiates this from the cases above is that Alder did it to a nominal ally, not an established enemy, in reaction to the threat of retirement, and against The Spree instead of the Camarilla. Alder's true sin is that she kept going it alone. We see what she could have done instead through how Wade is treated in S3. In 2x10, Petra was actually following Alder's footsteps in trying to intimidate Wade. That relationship was by no means destined to be productive. However, in S3, Petra invites other people to the table. She states that she would bow to Anacostia serving as her conscience. Then, she has M build an honest relationship with Wade, keeping Wade in the loop of information. And most importantly, Minerva speaks of how they got over themselves and the power-jockeying games to find common ground, instead of holding onto that military-civilian divide, which Alder could never let go of. Petra's growth over the course of the show is mirrored in her relationship with Abigail. It may well be the case that if she had pulled off the coup in S1, she wouldn't have done any better, still trying to be controlling to the expectations she had for herself and others, the "her high haughtiness" that Willa loathed. By later S2, Petra has become much more sensitive to the personal over the abstract, allowing her to decide that she would fight alongside Nicte, and then let her go on the run. But still. Petra's murder of Colonel Jarret is quite a blurry line from puppeting Wade. Just who gets to decide who is the enemy of the nation, foreign or domestic? It's really easy to interpret Wade's actions in S1 to be what Jarret did in that office. Tying her hands, threatening her power. Having the audacity to ask that there be some accountability to non-witches. If the Camarilla didn't have protections for Silver, should they have just permanently puppeted the man?

[finelinefae]

Could we please get a check in with the aviator? I love them like no other i swear

synopsis: y/n finds out she's pregnant with Aviator!Hs baby.

wordcount: 2.6 k

a/n: this isn't really a check-in more so something that happens a year into their relationship because i think about this moment a lot and i needed to write about it !!!!

also first one shot for the aviator whoop!!

. . .

It was the middle of the night. 

Y/N had been up since dinner, laying beside the toilet bowl so she could vomit the contents of her stomach every ten minutes. She’d stuck the thermometer under her armpit to check if she had a fever, only to find it at a completely normal temperature. 

She was tired and frustrated and her head hurt from throwing up so much. She hadn’t had a wink of sleep and she still had to get to work in the morning. 

The door swung open and Y/N lifted her tired eyes to find Nancy looking down at her, “You’ve been throwing up since dinner,” She held out a glass of cold water and Y/N gladly took it. 

“Sorry,” Y/N groaned, after taking a sip, “I’ve tried taking medicine but nothing seems to be working.”

Nancy sighed, “You don’t need to apologise, do you want me to call Harry?”

“No,” Y/N shook her head, “He’s been working all week, he’s probably exhausted.”

“Okay well you can’t just sit by the toilet all night, do you want me to warm you up some ginger ale?” Y/N sighed, considering her offer before pushing herself up from the floor and following Nancy to the kitchen.

She sat at the table, clutching her stomach and ignoring the nausea she felt. Nancy took out some ginger ale and began to heat in a saucepan over the stovetop. “I just don’t understand how I can feel like this but not even have a fever,” Y/N huffed. 

Nancy shrugged, “Are you due? Normally I feel pretty sick a week or so before my period starts,”

A dip forms between Y/N’s brows, “I don’t think so, I’m pretty sure-” Y/N paused, thinking back to the last time she had had her period. She had been waiting for it to arrive this week but one glance at the calendar on the kitchen refrigerator revealed that it was already a week late. 

Panic surged through her, “Nancy,” She gasped, looking up at her roommate and friend, “It’s late.”

Nancy’s eyes widened, “Are you sure?”

Y/N’s mind was racing to try and piece together the days but she knew that she was right and her period was over a week late.

Y/N didn’t have to say anything for Nancy to understand what she was thinking. “W-what am I going to do?” Y/N panicked as dread ensued her, “I-I can’t have a baby, I can’t.”

“Y/N, it’s okay,” Nancy crouched down on the floor in front of her and took her hands, “It’s going to be okay. Tomorrow morning we’ll go down to the clinic and ask them to take a test to make sure.”

Y/N shook her head, “Not the morning, Harry will know and he’ll-” She covered her mouth, “Oh God, Harry, what if he hates me?”

Nancy scoffed, “How could he possibly hate you? I’ve never seen someone as in love with somebody as he is with you,”

“But Nancy, a baby. It’s too soon and he’s still got Elise and-” Y/N’s mind was whirring with thoughts as she thought about how her life was about to change if she really was pregnant. Elise was only four and their relationship was still relatively new - they’d only celebrated their year anniversary a month ago which was more than likely to be the reason that got her in this predicament. 

“Y/N, calm down,” Nancy soothed her, “Everything’s going to be fine. We’ll deal with these things after we find out whether you really are pregnant or not. For now, we’ll go to bed and think about it in the morning, okay?”

Y/N nodded slowly, trying to digest the words she was hearing. Nancy was right, she needed to not worry until she had confirmation from the nurse that she really was pregnant. She tried to pause her worries until the morning but not a wink of sleep occurred when her mind was whirring with thoughts about how Harry would react to the possibility of it all. 

. . .

Y/N felt sick to her stomach as she walked to the hangar where she knew Harry would be working. She’d been so many times now that she knew exactly where to go, following the path through the doors and round the back.

“Evening Y/N,” One of the boys said as she walked past, tipping his hat. Y/N forced a smile onto her face in reply.

She walked through the back doors and found Harry outside smoking a cigarette on his own, the sun setting behind him. Unlike how she usually felt whenever she was around him, Y/N began to panic wondering whether she should turn back now before she told him something that would change both their lives forever. 

Harry’s head lifted and a smile carved onto his face when his eyes landed on her. He threw his cigarette on the ground and stubbed it with his foot, “Hi birdy,” He walked over and embraced her in a hug, pressing a kiss to her lips. 

Y/N knew Harry had sensed something was wrong from how stiff she felt in his embrace. He pulled back but his arms stayed looped around her, “Wha’s wrong?” He frowned, “Y’okay?” He cupped her face in his hands and looked her in the eye.

Y/N pulled away, “I’m okay,” She lied and Harry immediately knew something was wrong when she took a step away from him. Usually, whenever they were together there was barely any space between them.  

“Hey, when do y’ lie to me?” He forced a smile, a pit of dread forming in his stomach.

Y/N’s eyes glistened, she sniffled and scrunched her nose to try and prevent herself from crying. “I just missed you is all,” 

“Birdy,” A dip formed between his brows, “M always right here y’ know that. Did something happen at work today?” 

Y/N shook her head, wrapping her arms around herself, “No,” She replied, “I-I need to tell you something.”

This time Harry really did begin to panic. He thought back to the past few months and wondered if he had done anything wrong to upset her in that time but every day had been as blissfully sweet as the last. He was so in love with Y/N and that love continued to grow every passing day. She was the first person he woke up to in the morning and the last person he saw at night - every day it was Y/N, the love of his life. 

So he couldn’t understand what had currently gotten her so distant with him or why she was being so vague and secretive whenever she was with Nancy, “Are you…Are you breaking up with me?” Harry voiced his biggest concern out loud.

Y/N almost gasped, reaching for his hand and holding it to her chest, “God Harry, no. No, of course not.”

He relaxed slightly but still wondered what was going on in her head that was so difficult to tell, “Wha’s wrong then baby?”

Y/N released a shuddery breath, looking away from him and down at the hand she was currently holding. She twisted the ring on his pinkie finger, one lone tear rolling down her cheek that she quickly brushed away. “Harry, I'm pregnant.” She whispered, barely loud enough for him to hear. 

Her heart thudded against her chest when she felt his hand stiffen. She could barely look up at him as she waited for him to say something.

Two rough hands cupped her cheeks and lifted her head up. Her eyes met his, lips parting to see tears rolling down his cheeks and the biggest smile she had ever seen stretched across his face, “We’re havin’ a baby?” He whispered in disbelief.

Y/N nodded slowly, “I found out this afternoon.”

A laugh escaped his lips, “Holy shit,” He let go of her and ran his fingers through his hair before covering his face with his hands and smiling beneath them.

Y/N stood waiting, still a little tense until he took one step towards her and picked her up in his arms, her dress twirling as he spun them round, “Holy shit we’re having a baby.” 

A wave of relief washed over her, Y/N finally mirrored the smile on his face when she saw the excitement on his face. 

He set her back on her feet, “You’re not mad?” Y/N asked. 

“Why would I be mad? This is my dream, I’ve always wanted to be a dad.” Harry was unable to rid himself of the smile on his face.

“I know but we’ve been together a year and-” 

Harry silenced her by smashing their lips together in a messy kiss, “I love you bigger than the whole sky Birdy, there is not a single person in this entire world I would rather have as the mother of my child.”

Y/N’s eyes watered and tears began to fall as she smiled and wrapped her arms around his neck. His hands fell to her tummy, “I can’t believe there’s a tiny human in there,” Harry chuckled in disbelief. 

“I love you so much Harry,” Y/N murmured, wondering why she was ever nervous to tell him in the first place. 

. . .

Safe to say, Harry had become somewhat even more obsessed with Y/N than he had ever been before.

“Tha’s my baby mama!” He whistled, wearing his grease-covered overalls as he slid off the wing of the plane and ran towards Y/N who was only a month pregnant.

Y/N’s cheeks heated, eyes darting around, “Shh, what if someone hears you?” 

They had yet to tell any of their friends or Harry’s brothers that Y/N was pregnant.  Nancy had been sworn to secrecy despite her boyfriend constantly pestering her over telling him what they were always whispering about whenever Y/N refused a drink at a party. Harry struggled to keep such a big secret from his siblings since he had always told them everything, but Y/N wanted to make sure everything was okay before they let the world know another baby would be entering their little family. 

“There’s no one around, don’t worry.” Harry smiled, a dimple carving into his cheek. 

She had the tiniest bump, barely even noticeable unless she was bloated, but he was obsessed all the same. His hands reached for her sides, feeling the small curve of her tiny bump as he held her. “Hi Harry,” Y/N grinned, “Thought we could walk to the clinic together.”

Today they would be having their first appointment together with their assigned midwife. Harry had been close to a kid at Christmas as he counted down the days until he got to hear his baby’s heartbeat. “Yeah, I’ll pack my stuff away and we’ll head on down,” He nodded but stopped to kiss her quickly, “Missed y’,” He murmured. 

Y/N laughed, “You saw me three hours ago,” 

“Much too long,” He countered, slipping away from her and going to pack his things away. 

He returned in a fresh white t-shirt and jeans, reaching for her hand and threading their fingers together as they walked down to the clinic. 

Harry could feel Y/N’s nerves bouncing off of her as they sat in the waiting room of the small office waiting for their midwife to call them in. She fiddled with her fingers in her lap, tapped her foot against the floor and chewed on her bottom lip. Every now and then her eyes would glance to the door like she was desperate to get out. 

He reached for her hand, holding it in his lap and playing with the small ring on her index finger. His thumb traced the mole in the middle of her wrist, her pulse fluttering beneath it. “Y’ okay?” He murmured.

“Jus’ nervous,” She admitted, “I don’t like doctor’s offices all that much.”

“Y’ not having second thoughts about the baby are you? Because if you were there are things we can do and talk about. I-I’d never force y’ to have a baby, y’know that right Birdy?” Harry said. 

Y/N’s eyes softened, she cupped his cheek in her hand, “I want this baby with you more than I want anything ever.”

Harry smiled, “Y’ mean that?” He needed that reassurance from her more than anything. 

“I mean it,” She kissed him quickly. 

The door clicked open and in walked the midwife, “Y/N Y/L/N?” 

Y/N took a deep breath, squeezing Harry’s hand as they stood up. The midwife, an older woman with kind eyes, gestured for them to follow her into a small room. There was a simple examination bed and a tall metal stand with a strange, trumpet-like device hanging from it.

“This is a fetal stethoscope,” the midwife explained, picking up the device. “It’s how we’ll listen to your baby’s heartbeat.”

Y/N climbed onto the bed, her heart racing. Harry stood by her side, never letting go of her hand. The midwife placed the wide end of the stethoscope on Y/N’s abdomen and pressed her ear to the other end.

The room was silent as the midwife concentrated. Then, her face lit up with a smile. “There it is,” she said, turning to the expectant parents. “Your baby’s heartbeat. Would you like to listen?”

Harry’s eyes widened as he nodded eagerly. The midwife handed him the earpiece, and he leaned down, his expression changing from nervousness to awe as he heard the rapid, steady thump of their baby’s heart.

“Our baby,” Harry whispered, his voice thick with emotion. 

Y/N could feel her eyes welling up as she watched him. Her hand reached out to thread through his curls as he pressed his ear to the earpiece once more and listened for the faint sound of a beating heart they had created, “Can y’ hear it?” Y/N smiled, tears rolling down her cheeks. 

“Tha’s our baby,” He repeated like he couldn’t quite believe what he was hearing.

“Tha’s right, H.” Y/N said softly.

Harry reached for her bump, placing both of his big, heavy palms on it. He lowered his head and pressed a small kiss to the spot above her belly button, “Hello baby,” He murmured, “How can I love you this much when all I can hear is y’ heart?” 

Y/N smiled, letting him have his moment, “Promise I’ll take such good care of it,” He continued to speak soft and slow, “Both yours and mamas,”

Harry reached for Y/N’s hand and held it in his own, his other palm resting right over her bump. He felt Y/N give his hand a gentle squeeze and wondered if she could hear just how fast his heart beat for her even without the earpiece.

“Don’t cry,” Harry smiled, reaching to wipe away Y/N’s tears. 

“I’m just happy,” Y/N sniffled, “You’re going to be such a good dad, Harry, I hope you know that.”

The words settled something in him. All his nerves seemed to melt away, replaced by an overwhelming sense of love and anticipation for the new life they were about to bring into the world together. 

A family of his own. 

“I love you birdy,” He leans down and speaks to the bump once more, “and I love you too, baby birdy.” Y/N laughed and watched as Harry continued in conversation with their baby, hearing nothing but a gentle heartbeat in reply to his voice.