#whole conversation in a sense. and it’s just a lot of noise right now when it’s later at night and we’re supposed to be winding down more

[insanechayne]

~ ~ ~

[studentinpursuitofclouds]

The farmer is a pretty heavy sleeper if even a meteor landing on their farm won't get them up before 6am but what about their spouse? How would they all (sve included if you'd like) react to not only a whole space rock hitting the farm but the farmer reacting with nothin more than a sleepy "oh was probably just a meteor... I'll check that in the mornin."

I had a lot of fun with this scenario, really liked the idea itself. Thank you so much for the ask, and enjoy! 💕

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SDV/SVE bachelors:

Sam said quietly, "Oh, okay," and laid his head back on the pillow, falling asleep again. When morning came, the young guitarist would consider his vague recollection of this conversation a dream. What will be his surprise when he sees an actual meteorite lying not far from their house. "Babe, that could have ended badly..." "No worries, Sammy, but if you want, we'll check it out next time." ...Next time?????

"Did you hear that?!" "Relax, dear, it's just a meteorite..." "Ah, alright... It's a WHAT?!" And the slogan of this Harvey's headcanon: "A meteorite is the best alarm clock! You'll wake up right away!" Although in Farmer's case - they woke up to a fuss made by their worried husband. But you can understand the Pelican Town doctor, too - a bloody piece of cosmic rock fell right into your yard, it's hard to stay calm.

Elliott literally fell out of bed from such a loud sound outside the window, and Farmer continued to snore quietly??? The writer was so confused, he didn't know if he should wake up Farmer or not. "Mmmm... Did'a meteorit fal' again... I'll deal with it tmorrw... 💤" Farmer mumbled, leaving Elliott even more confused. Meteorite? Wha- again? They mean... it's happened before and it's going to happen again?! What is happening?!

"Hon, what the fuck." At first Shane's reaction to Farmer's words wasn't too violent, because he's still sleepy. But after a couple of seconds the meaning of the words reached him, the gyrus in his brain started working and he shrieked: "The coop! Charlie!" The realisation that the animals might have been hit by the meteorite instantly brought Farmer to their feet.

No matter how hard Alex tried - his spouse slept like a dead man, muttering that they would check the source of the noise tomorrow. What do they mean, tomorrow?! They need to check it now! Alex can't just leave it alone, so he goes to check it out, with or without Farmer. Whoa, a real meteorite... Erm, shouldn't they tell Lewis or someone about this?

Meteorite or not, Sebastian remained surprisingly calm. He gave up trying to wake Farmer and went to the window to see what was out there. They were right - it was in fact a meteorite, a real one. And there's light coming from it. So cool. "Sure you don't want to come with me, dear?" Farmer mumbled something incomprehensible in response, and the emo decided to go alone, to look at the cool sky rock. Because why not.

Lance sensed something was wrong before the meteorite touched the ground. Fortunately, the far-sighted gallant adventurer had put up a magical barrier that prevented the space rock from crashing into his and Farmer's house or barns. The meteorite had fallen, all was well. "I take it this phenomenon is not new to you?" He smiled as his spouse mumbled "tomorrow..." in their sleep. Well then, they both can look at the meteorite later.

"Razor!" Magnus jumped up sharply from the bed, casting the spell on automatic. The trajectory of the falling meteorite was reversed, and the celestial stone plummeted into the water, no longer posing a danger to the forest. "Farmer, meteorite." "Mhmm, five more minutes.... I'll look at the meteorite tomorrow...." Magnus wondered how his dearest spouse could even survive as an adventurer with no sense of self-preservation. It's a damn meteorite!

A whole palette of emotions was bubbling up inside Victor, awake from the noise. What was that! A meteorite? A real one! It's probably incredibly hot right now, he shouldn't go near it.... But it's a meteorite! It's so scary, and so interesting! Farmer, don't hide your head under the pillow, but get a flashlight. Victor's taking them out to see the space rock! Well, and make sure everything's okay and no animals are hurt, too.

SDV/SVE bachelorettes:

A meteorite?! A real rock of cosmic origin fell right on the farm? Maru immediately jumps out of bed and wakes up Farmer. It's unclear, however, whether this reaction of hers is simple worry about putting out the fire from the meteorite fall or that the young inventor is thrilled that she and her spouse will see the meteorite up close! Probably both. Either way, Farmer won't sleep well tonight...

"What makes you think it's a meteorite? Maybe it's aliens? Oh, that's so cool! Get up quick or we'll miss the whole thing! And grab a sword, just in case." The force with which Abigail was prancing poor Farmer made them realise at once that their wife was not going to let them finish their beauty sleep. Unlikely aliens in there, but they'd have to check anyway. Ugh...

Poor Penny is in complete shock at how calmly Farmer has reacted to everything. Don't they care what happens to the farm? What if what fell down caused a fire and everything could burn? There's a forest nearby, it would be a huge fire! Penny tearfully begged her sleepy spouse to check it out before it's too late. Farmer had to get up (they hate to see their lovely wife crying).

"Did you hear that, Farmer?" "Yep, meteorite hit again, I'll look tomorrow..." Leah can already see the fire that has travelled from the glowing space rock to the dry summer grass. Oh no, there's going to be a fire now... She wakes Farmer up with one mighty shove and shouts an emergency. And as much as Farmer grumbled over their interrupted sleep - the artist was right. A forest fire is a very dangerous.☝️

The sound of a meteorite falling may not have been able to wake Farmer, but the shriek of terror of their wife Haley sure knocked them out of dreamland. "Shh, Haley, it's only a meteorite..." JUST A METEORITE?! Is Farmer laughing at her? Oh no, they can't go back to the dream realm now - Haley wakes them up again and tells them to look at that fallen meteorite before something else happens. Haley's half asleep herself, but she's scared, so she'll insist on checking it out now.

Before going to bed, Emily read a daily horoscope in a magazine that she would soon "be given a big sign, so make your decision at once." Nowhere, however, did it say that this "sign" was a huge rock from the sky. But at least she made the decision right away, (and the right one) - getting Farmer out if bed, despite their protests, to make sure the falling meteorite didn't destroy anything. No "tomorrow", it had to be now. She hopes no animals were! Her heart couldn't take it...

Claire jumped up in bed, as if scalded by boiling water, at the rattling of window glass and the vibrations throughout the house. Something had fallen on the farm - and that 'something' is very big. She woke and woke her spouse to no avail, who only responded to the terrifying sound with a louder snore. How did they even manage not to wake up from such a noise? And how could they mumbling so calmly about the meteorite?!

Poor Sophia, frightened by a scary sound outside , immediately pressed herself against Farmer, trying to hide. Farmer kissed her gently and told her that it was just a meteorite, that everything was fine and they would protect her. After saying "it's okay" and "I will protect you" the panic inside Sophia was extinguished and she fell asleep again in the arms of her spouse. The meteorite in the morning would definitely be a shock to her (she thought she had dreamed the whole thing).

After that horrible sound, Olivia not only wakes Farmer up, but also gets almost half the town up, making one call to Lewis and claiming that something terrible has happened on her and Farmer's property. Farmer sleepily tried to convince Olivia that a fallen meteorite was no big deal, but she wasn't convinced. How is that - a huge, dangerous rock from outer space - and not dangerous!

[cheesecakeluver]

I STILL GET JEALOUS

hamzahthefantastic x reader

slight nsfw warning!

｡♪𖦹°⋆ When Hamzah, your roommate, comes home to your hookup finally leaving, he's decides to confront you about it, releasing his emotions and telling you what he feels.

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As she pushed her fling out of her room, y/n waved to him, smirking. “Call me” she said, smiling as he made his way towards the door, freezing upon making eye contact with Hamzah, her roommate. She didn’t know he would be home this early, which was the main reason her fling was here.

Hamzah watched the two, pausing for a second as his eyes fixated on the half naked boy. Anger running through his body as he clenched his fists. Waiting for the man to get the hell of out his apartment so he could give y/n a piece of his mind. No. A whole damn lecture.

The man quickly made his way out the door, not before waving back to y/n with a cocky grin on his face. He quickly left once he saw Hamzah's intimidating expression, staring daggers at him.

All y/n could do was was stand in her doorway, her expression full of guilt as she shifted uncomfortably under Hamzah’s glare. She hasn't meant for him to see this. For him to see her, all flustered and messy.

Hamzah slowly walked in front of y/n, standing directly in front of her with his arms folded against his chest. There was a mix of jealousy and anger that had been building inside of him, now finally snapping. Yet, he tried to hold it together.

"So, who was he?" He spoke, trying to keep his voice at bay.

“He’s just a guy I know..” she muttered, avoiding eye contact as she fiddled with her hands, praying that this conversation would be over and done with swiftly.

Hamzah grabbed her chin, lifting her face up to look directly at him. His touch was firm and almost commanding her to look at him. "Just a guy?” He questioned, “Just a guy who left your room shirtless?” There was a hint of sarcasm in his tone now.

“Hamzah..” she muttered, pushing his hand away from her as her eyes darted up to his.

“You constantly bring girls to our apartment. What’s the deal if I bring a guy around a couple times?” She sighed, shaking her head.

Hamzah's eye twitched, a sense of irritation slowly building within him. He slowly took a step closer, forcing her to back into the wall behind her. Now mere inches away from her, his breath humid on her skin. His voice became stern. "That’s different. They never stay the night. I never go back for seconds." there was a hint of possessiveness in his tone for some reason.

“I’ve seen that.. that ‘guy’ here before. Sneaking in, staying the night, sneaking out again. I’m sick of waking up and seeing his smug face in my kitchen, eating my food, and drinking my fucking coffee.”

His body now pressed against hers, pinning her to the wall as he looked down at her. His expression hardened, yet he was internally cursing at himself for how he was acting.

“I don't know whether it's my head messing with me but he seemed a hell of a lot more than just a “guy you know" he mumbled.

“Whenever you bring your girls over, whether they stay the night or not, you make a hell of a lot of fucking noise Hamzah. Just because I bring a guy around a couple times, doesn’t excuse your actions either. I'm not the only guilty one here.” She retorted, her voice louder this time.

Hamzah gritted his teeth, his eyes narrowing at her words. He hated the fact she had a point. It was a damn good one too, but he couldn’t admit that. Not right now anyway.

“It’s different.” He mumbled, repeating his response from earlier. He knew deep down it was hypocritical of him to act like this, but a part of him didn’t damn care. He was annoyed and wanted, no, needed to know more.

She rolled her eyes, shaking her head at his defiance. “Hamzah, no it isn’t.” She sighed. “Stop fucking saying that, when you know it isn’t true”

With him still pressed against her, he pushed a knee to part her legs. Slowly bringing his face closer to hers, a subtle growl in his throat. “Then tell me. Who is he? What does he do? How did you meet him?” He questioned. each question coming out coldly and sharply.

She shuddered, heat rising in her core as his knee pushed against her sensitively.

“He’s a guy I met at one night, when i was out with friends, not that it’s any of your fucking buisness. And he’s practicing to be dentist, if you must know.” She spoke, her voice wavering slightly, wondering why he was getting so worked up, when he did the exact same things that she did.

Hamzah paused momentarily, a silence hanging between them as his eyes scanned over her face. She had a point. He had no right to question her. But he still didn’t care. A pang of jealousy and annoyance still coursed through him, no matter how illogical it was.

He placed both hands either side of her hips, trapping her more as his expression darkened slightly. “Right.” He muttered lowly. “Practicing to be a dentist.” He repeated, a hint of sarcasm clear in his tone.

His fingers danced across y/n’s hips, nearly causing her to gasp as they fluttered over her. She needed to hold myself together, to stand her ground, even if her knees felt as though they were about to crumble beneath her. “Dentistry is a good career path, you know. The moneys great.” She said, her voice shaking a little.

“More than you make anyway” she muttered under her breath, her eyes on the floor beneath her. Y/n knew it was a low blow, and regretted it the second the words flew out of her mouth.

Hamzah’s jaw tightened as her words stung, a reminder that he only had YouTube and streaming to thank him for the career path he chose. But that didn’t mean it hurt any less.

He reached his hand up to grab her chin again, slowly but firmly bringing her face up to look at him. His gaze darkened as he pinned her more against the wall. “Watch it.” He threatened in a low tone. “Don’t bring my fucking career into this.”

“Then don’t be such an asshole to the guys I’m with, huh?” Y/n whispered, eyeing him up as she saw his jaw clenched, his knee pushing harder against her throbbing core.

He let out a low scoff, his jaw only clenching more as his knee pressed harder against her. A part of him enjoying the way he could rile her up. It excited him.

“You want me to sit back and watch you bring more guys home? You expect me to just go with it and accept it?” He questioned, his voice sharp once again.

“”I’ve come to terms with the fact you go through five girls a week Hamzah. Why can’t you accept that I’m an adult, and I need human touch sometimes!” She yelled, unaware of her voices volume as she became overwhelmed, this argument, her feelings, and Hamzah’s teasing getting to her.

His body slowly pressed more against hers, her voice only making him more frustrated and angry. His grip on her chin tightened slightly, his breaths becoming heavier as he leaned down to speak lowly in her ear.

“listen to me, don’t you dare yell at me.” He said firmly but quietly, making her shiver, as goosebumps coated her spine.

Hamzah’s grip around her waist tightened, his body now completely against hers. Her small frame pressed against his, the feel of her body making his breath hitch.

He moved his head closer to her ear, his breath fanning across her neck. He took a moment to choose his words, trying to keep his mind under his control.

“Do you any idea how jealous seeing you with other guys makes me?” He muttered lowly.

She paused, her eyes widening as realisation flooded her, her mind racing a hundred miles per hour.

He leaned back just enough to look down at her, his eyes flicking over her expression as his adam’s apple bobbed up and down. He noticed the slight shock as realisation took over her.

He was still pinned her against the wall, his body still pressed against hers. He expression was almost… vulnerable. And he hated how arousing it was to see her like this.

“I never knew” she whispered breathlessly, the heat radiating off of Hamzah, and onto her due to their proximity.

He raised an eyebrow, seeing how caught off guard she seemed. A flicker of satisfaction ran through him as he continued to hold her pinned against the wall.

“You’re telling me you never once noticed how annoyed I got when I watched you bring home guys?” he asked, his mouth now hovering just above her shoulder.

“I thought you didn’t like them taking up space. Using our commodities. Being too loud when we were..” she trailed off, thoughts overcoming her. How could she be so oblivious?

Hamzah almost chuckled at her words. The fact that she thought that’s what bothered him was almost hysterical. To think she never once thought he got jealous.

He let out a long sigh before looking back at her, a hint of annoyance still in him but for a different reason this time. “You really couldn’t notice that I cared a little bit more than that, huh?” He muttered.

“I was so wrapped up in.. well.. other things, that I wasn’t thinking about you, or you even liking me that way..” she muttered, embarrassed by the lack of care she had had for him.

Hamzah’s jaw clenched, hearing her say she didn’t think about him made something inside of him go crazy. He wasn’t used to being someone’s afterthought.

He suddenly grabbed both of her wrists, pinning them above her head against the wall. His body moved closer as his voice dropped to an almost possessive tone. “Other things like what?”

Y/n sighed, knowing she had to be truthful to him. “Other guys..” she softly spoke, her eyes darting away from his.

The truth stung him in the chest, causing his grip around her wrists to tighten slightly. Hearing her admit that the other guys she brought home meant more to her than he did, did not sit well with him at all.

He pressed himself more against her, his mind telling him to keep control. He gritted his teeth before speaking again. “Did any of those other guys ever make you feel good?”

Her eyes avoided him, and she quietly spoke. “Yes..”

Hearing she said “yes” was like daggers in his chest. He wasn’t used to being second best, no matter what the situation. Now it made sense why she never noticed he got jealous. Other guys took up all her time and attention.

A hint of annoyance mixed with jealousy flickered across his face as he pinned her against the wall even more. “How did they make you feel?” he asked lowly, his voice almost a growl.

“I think you could make me feel better” she whispered, feeling brave as her mind still reeled from his confession. She traced her arms to the back of his neck, softly playing with his curls. The whole situation was sinking into her, and she was left with a feeling of need for him, whether she realised it or not.

A small gasp escaped his mouth when her hands reached the back of his neck. He was not expecting that in the slightest. Suddenly her hands felt like fire against his skin as they ran through his curls, making him let out an involuntary sigh.

He leaned down, resting his forehead against hers as he let out a shaky breath. There was a battle going on in his mind between letting her be and claiming her as his own.

“What do you think, Hamzah..” she whispered in his ear, her lips brushing over his early softly, waiting for his approval.

He almost cursed at her touch. Her lips on the shell of his ear, her body pressed against his, her legs sandwiched between his. The fact he still had her wrists pinned above her head made it even more torturous.

He let out a low growl, biting back the words he was begging to spill. After a moment he looked down at her, taking in her flushed expression and breathless eyes before speaking. “Say you’re mine.”

She paused, thinking of the consequences of admitting this to him.

He could almost see the thoughts racing through her head, the uncertainty and doubt that hung in the air between them.

He squeezed her wrists, removing them from his neck, bringing his face closer to hers, his breath fanning across her cheek. “Say it then.” He demanded, his voice stern yet a hint of desperation clung to his tone.

“I’m yours, Hamzah”

A wave of satisfaction coursed through him at those words. She was his. Hearing her say it, just confirmed it even more.

He let out a deep hum before looking down at her, her wrists still trapped in his grip. “Good girl.” He muttered, a possessive growl in his tone. “I don't want you bringing any boys home again. You got that?”

“I don’t want you bringing any other girls home. If you want a girl, I’m here.” She bluntly put it, her tone possessive as she waited for his answer intently, her eyes glancing over his face, his eyes, his jaw. Anything she could land her eyes on.

He knew he should have expected that reply and for some reason, made her all the more attractive for it. He smirked at her, tilting his head slightly as his eyes darkened. “You’re going to keep me satisfied are you?” His hold on her wrists loosened, lowering them down slowly.

She smirked, nodding her head slowly as her eyes narrowed, and lips glistened as she ran her tongue over them.

He let out a low hum, keeping his smirk in place as he looked her up and down, taking in her flushed and breathless expression. She was all his now.

He brought his hands to her hips, pulling her close to him. Feeling her body against his, he almost groaned at how good it felt.

Bringing her hands to his face, she leaned in slowly, her neediness become clearer, and her core became wet, and urges became stronger.

Her on his face felt like a fire against his skin as he pulled her even closer to his body. He couldn’t help but notice her getting restless, needy even. He let out a low chuckle before leaning down to her ear. “So desperate for me, huh?” He whispered before pulling back, a smirk on his face.

“Stop teasing me, or maybe, I’ll call Hugh again” she threatened, smirking. Deep down, Y/n knew she would call that man again, not when she had Hamzah. But it was fun to get a reaction out of him. It turned her on.

Hamzah's smirk dropped instantly when she mentioned bringing Hugh back here again. He knew she was only trying to get a rise out of him, but damn it was working. He clenched his jaw, a frown on his face.

"You wouldn't dare call that bastard back again." He said through gritted teeth, his grip on her tightening ever so slightly.

"Then give me what i fucking deserve." She spoke boldly, her mouth releasing the words that danced across her mind without even realising it.

Her words, hearing her say "give me what I fucking deserve" made him snap. A mix of anger, possessiveness and impatience all coursing though his body now.

He grabbed her waist, practically pushing her back against the wall as his mouth attached to her neck.

Her back arched almost immediately, as he sucked and pulled at her sweet spot with his teeth. She groaned softly, his name and other curses flowing off her tongue.

Hearing his name falling from her lips, hearing her curse under her breath as sucked and bit at her neck and shoulder made his head spin. The way she reacted to him and his touch was driving him insane. He wanted to claim her.

He pushed his body against hers, pushing a thigh between her legs as he continued his onslaught on her skin.

He began kissing her jawline, and neck, and finally sank down to his knees, ready to give her what she deserved.

He kneeled in front of her, his hands trailing down her body, past her hips before stopping on her thighs. His hands gently pulled her light blue pj shorts down her smooth legs as he continued to kiss and suck at her skin. His mouth was almost as greedy as his eyes, wanting to touch and feel every inch of her.

He bit a mark on her thigh, hard enough to cause a slight pain but not enough to break the skin. He needed to claim her as his own.

Her body nearly bent over backwards at this, shuddering and shivering at the slightest touches.

Hearing the way her body reacted to him was like sweet ecstasy to his ears. It only made him want and need her more with each passing second.

He continued to run his lips and teeth across her thighs, leaving dark marks in his wake to make his claim known. He looked up through his lashes at her, her shaking body and flushed face only egging his on.

Looking up at her through his lashes, he let go of her thighs and paused, silently asking her for permission to continue.

he watched as her eyes darkened, pupils blown out as she looked back at him. Her chest rising and falling rapidly as she tried to catch her breath. She looked almost wrecked already and they’d only just gotten started.

She nodded vigorously, her lips bruised due to biting them, as she waited patiently for him to begin his rampage.

He paused, his eyes scanning every part of her, as if he couldn't get enough of her. He shot up, onto his feet and off of his bruised knees, his arms trailing around her waist as she let out a huff, annoyed at the loss of touch. At the lost of connection between them.

He picked her up, his strong arms wrapping around her and slinging her over his shoulder with ease as she let out a squeal, her mind fogging over as thoughts of his arms doing other things to her flooded her, filling her with desire and desperation. She needed him, on her, in her, any way she could get him.

As the two made their way towards Hamzah's bedroom, sultry thoughts in their heads, they collectively knew that it wouldn't be the same after this. Something was happening, something that would change the course of their lives.

For better, or for worse, the two were becoming much, much more than just roommates.

[themonochromaticcat]

Joost Klein HC’s

>Joost x Autistic!Gn!Reader

>genre- fluff / Headcanons / idk?

>warnings- ableism for one of the hc’s; idk man 😕

A/N uhmmm I haven’t wrote in ages, so this could possibly be a bit bad but after a while trust me- I’ll be better. The autism hc’s and hate are based off of my own experiences, so they might not be accurate for everyone!! And if you have requests just message me- they’re open for now <3 Hope you enjoy!

2nd A/N this is right before posting- but Joost is autistic??? What a coincidence 😭

He’d be really patient with you if you needed it- specially sensory issues! Like if anything got too much for you he’d probably have your noise cancelling headphones or something similar.

He’d gladly listen to you rant about your hyper fixations! Like he’d sit and indulge in the conversation with you and try learn about it so that he could talk to you about it ^_^

If someone was really rude about any special needs you had, he’d instantly defend you and scold (or educate) the person that was being rude.

He wouldn’t really be surprised when you revealed that you were autistic; though a lot of things would make more sense to him.

He’d definitely help you make your guys’ house a safe space (if you moved in together) and make sure that the whole process isn’t very overwhelming.

Whenever he has tours / concerts he tries to make the whole process really comfortable for you - like giving you a space in the vip area; noise cancelling headphones; etc, etc.

HAIII!!1!1!1!!! I hoped y’all liked this <33 this is my first official proper post so yippee!!1! Sorry that it’s a bit short though, I’m just getting used how to write on here :,( Any feedback will be appreciated as English isn’t my first language, anyways, have a good day/night.

🌿💐 Chroma.

[untildawnss]

tailspin - joshua washington (until dawn)

in which josh always felt like the odd one out in his family and group of friends.

yes, i like to hurt my own feelings, why do you ask?

definitely inspired by myself and a few songs: gasoline by halsey, work in progress by the dangerous summer, 100 bad days by ajr, yes i'm a mess by ajr, breakdown by you me at six, i wanna get better by the bleachers, overwhelmed by royal & the serpent, panic room by au/ra, young by girli, crawling by linkin park

cw: depression, suicidal ideation, angst, attempted suicide

wc: 2.8k

josh looked down at the half-empty cup that he was balancing between his knee and the thumb and index finger of his right hand, tilting it down and back up right before the drink spilled over. his left thumb touched the tip of his index finger, then his middle finger, ringfinger and pinkie and back again while he inhaled for four seconds, held that breath for four seconds, exhaled for four seconds and then paused for another four seconds. he was uncomfortably aware of his heartbeat. "hey, josh!" it took him a second to realise that someone was talking to him. "josh, we're up." the cup in his hand slipped slightly. "what?" josh looked up and there was chris, doing lunges and kicks and punching the air. "beerpong, bro! what's wrong with you?" everything. "nothing, just got really into planning my strategy." he drained the cup, forced his face into the well-practiced, toothy grin that he sported in every picture and whooped. "let's fucking go, bro! these suckers won't know what hit 'em."

the noise of the party was gone. josh could have called a cab or ordered an uber but he craved the fresh air and quiet that the walk home guaranteed. no driver trying to make conversation, no fastest route. he wasn't sure if he wanted to go home. sometimes it didn't feel like home. he felt out of place. his sisters had each other, their parents were barely involved anymore. and then there was him. josh. the oldest, the problem, the one that just didn't fit in. and he was going where his feet were taking him now. he'd had a lot to drink. he didn't feel like he made sense the way he was, just a bit off, like he was not entirely one single, whole person. just pieces of someone that were held together by the people around him. but there was no one around now and josh felt like he was crumbling, falling apart atom by atom. the darkness was suffocating and liberating at the same time and he stood still for a second or two. his hands were shaking and he didn't know why. now that he was alone he wished he wasn't. but he couldn't stand being around his friends either. because maybe they hated him as much as he hated himself.

josh's room was pitch black. even hannah and beth were already asleep when he finally snuck into the house. the buzz from the party had more than worn off at this point and his ears were ringing. it felt like someone was sitting on his chest, he definitely couldn't breathe right and his heart was beating faster. naturally, he'd made his way to the cabinet where his parents kept the booze to sneak another two or six big gulps of vodka or whiskey or whatever his hands could find in the dark corner of the room. just to calm down, to sleep. and here he was, throat burning and that ache in his chest still pulsing, pumping, stabbing. he could barely breathe. josh's eyes were stinging. he was tired now, away from everyone and everything. almost like a sensory deprivation chamber, if it wasn't for the creases in the sheets and the wrinkles in his shirts he felt against his back and thighs and calves. he hated it, being this aware of his own body. the old clock on the wall was ticking. he was trying to breathe in time with the ticking hand, four seconds, four seconds. but his lips were quavering and his eyes were stinging and he felt like he was choking. and then he was crying.

he'd fallen asleep at one point because someone was opening his curtains and the bright morning light stung in his still puffy eyes. someone sat down on the side of his bed. his body shifted with the dip in his mattress and his stomach lurched. another person plopped down on the other side of the bed. he heaved this time. "leave me alone," josh groaned. "mom and dad said to wake you up or we're not taking you to the beach." hannah and beth sounded excited. "don't wanna go to the beach. i'm not feeling well." josh pulled his blanket over his head. he felt his mattress shifting again, the twins' weight on his left and right vanishing. they left the door open. he heard someone else walk in and close the door. his mattress shifted again. a hand pulled the blanket off his face and gently stroked the side of his face. mom. he felt like crying again. "joshua, you're not feeling well?" she always used his given name when he wasn't well. "we can stay home." no, i'll ruin everything. "no, you can go. i'll call you if i need anything." she kissed his forehead. "are you sure?" no. he nodded. "okay." she closed the door when she walked out and he heard them, having fun, without him, as a family. they don't need me.

josh felt paralysed. some invisible, intangible force was trapping him in this bed, his bed. it had been a few hours since his family had left for the weekend trip to the beach. he had barely moved since then. the afternoon sun was reflecting off of the clock on his wall. it was still friday. he still had until sunday until his parents and sisters would get back. and he didn't belong. not really, anyway. hannah and beth were a few years younger and anything he'd never managed to achieve, they had. he was just the one that fell off the wagon years ago and had messed up the picture perfect family. there was a kind of disconnect, his body seemed to move without his input sometimes. he barely remembered getting in the shower or having breakfast, or maybe it was lunch at this point. josh could barely decide if he wanted to be alone or not before he had sent a text to the group chat with his friends asking them if they had any plans for tonight. it was too late now but he was barely convinced they liked him when he was at his best anyway, so what difference did it really make now?

they'd all agreed to come over to his place since his parents were out. they had invited more people, too. i should be fine. but he wasn't. there were so many people everywhere and he wished they would just leave. he should be fine, but he was not. he was anxious. he could barely move around his house without walking in on conversations or kisses or more. it was getting hard to breathe again. josh felt like someone was crushing his chest. but he was standing upright, just tipsy and dying to get out of this house, his house where everyone else wanted to stay and have fun. but something was happening to him and his breathing was getting shallower and he was stumbling, tumbling, falling up the stairs looking for a door that would keep him safe from whatever was going on down there. and then josh was in a bedroom, a guestroom that was barely ever used and he was clawing at his chest, at the heart that was beating the wrong way and making him gasp for air and everything was painful and he hit the floor, still clutching his chest. and josh wished he had never asked anyone for anything, not even their time. everyone was here and he was here and breaking down and the door was closed but it was barely anything between him fighting for his life and everyone else having fun. they don't need me. no one needs me. they didn't, they really didn't. he was living in the house with the fun stuff that rich people had. but if he just disappeared they'd still have hannah and beth. because everyone loved them. and he was just there.

josh had been in this room for a while. might've been minutes, might've been days. he didn't remember. maybe he was somewhere else. didn't matter, really. he was like a ship adrift, waves of consciousness crashing into him, bouncing him, left and right, port and starboard. faces flashed before his eyes, maybe friendly. and he was here, his back against a hard surface and two faces he knew in front of him. "sam, is he okay?" chris sounded panicked. there was something pressing against his neck. "he has a pulse. he's fine, he's alive, he's fine, chris." chris and sam. they were here. "what's up, guys?" he could barely hear himself. maybe he was slurring his words. he did drink a lot. "josh, you good?" chris was leaning in closer. josh gave him a thumbs up and tried grinning like he always did. "i'm good, cochise." he tried to aim the finger guns at chris. maybe he aimed them at sam. he wasn't sure. and before he knew it he was upright and there was sam on one side and chris on the other and he tried to walk where they were taking him but he was too drunk and so slow.

josh was in his bed again. there was still music downstairs. and he was tired but he wasn't. he wanted to scream, to tell everyone to shut up. but his body wouldn't move the way he wanted it to. he let his hands sweep around him to find his phone. there it was, neatly placed on his bedstand next to a glass of, probably, water. he was too far from coherent to understand the words on the screen the way he normally did. he had to bring the screen as close as possible and squint and finally his eye focused on the words. he tapped on chris' name. it took him a while, seeing as he was one handed and one eyed but josh finally managed to send a message to chris. who's still here? where are you? the words felt like heavy lifting, or maybe it was just the oncoming hangover that made him feel this way. we're getting everyone to go home. yeah, that was probably best. josh could barely type and send his response before he passed out again.

when josh woke up it was saturday. maybe midday or the afternoon. whatever. but there were no more people in his house and there was trash everywhere and a note from chris on the inside of the front door. we tried our best. and josh smiled because chris and sam could've left everything for him to clean up but they didn't. maybe they didn't hate him. he didn't dare debate this now that he was alone and had to clean the house. he preferred to believe that maybe they did like him. and so he turned on the music and turned it up to the point his parents would intervene because it would give him tinnitus.

josh started collecting all the disposable cups and pizza boxes he could find around the house and on the patio. chris and sam had probably done a lot already because there had been so many people last night, he still filled almost an antire bag. he craved a cigarette. no one knew he had started smoking. maybe chris, but he wouldn't say anything. i should be fine. he wasn't. he wasn't fine at all. josh spent the rest of the day trying to clean the house, just trying to make sure his parents wouldn't realise he'd had a party.

but when the night came he was restless again. and he couldn't resist. blades seemed so vulgar. he'd put his father's gun to his head before, once or twice, just to know how it felt. and now it was 4 in the morning and he just wanted to not exist. and the pills were right there. but josh wasn't sure. did he want to go out that way? he didn't actually know. but the music was playing and he there were the pieces of everyone he loved the most flashing before his eyes. there was beth. you can't wake up. there was hannah. this is not a dream. mom. you're part of a machine. dad. you are not a human being. chris. with your face all made up, living on a screen. sam. low on self-esteem, so you run on gasoline. josh. i think there's a flaw in my code. and he didn't know if this was real anymore. he knew he didn't fit in. i'm not scared. at least he tried not to be. but he was.

and josh tried, he really tried. but his pills were right there and he was just a disturbance in the perfect life his friends and family were living, right? they won't miss me. the thought was bouncing and bumping and jumping around and around in his head. he wanted to get better but he didn't know how, how, how. nothing helped and even drinking helped for a few hours at most. and they don't want me anyway. he was sure they didn't. they had hannah and beth and they got trophies and awards and everything he didn't. and sam liked hannah better anyway. and chris, chris would find a new friend. someone cooler than him.

he had deliberated, thought about this. there was really nothing else to do, nothing he could do, was there? but it was barely an hour until his family was supposed to be back. and he was panicking because he didn't want to see him like this but there was no other way. josh cried again. but because he had waited too long. and he was sitting on his bed, a glass of water and almost a month's supply of pills on his bedstand. oh death. and he begged for gods he didn't believe in to take him. and so he stuffed the pills in his mouth and it took him three, four, five, six gulps to swallow them all. and josh sat there and he was fine and he didn't want to be. he wanted to die and he took his pills, all at one,. and he was fine and he hated it. and then his vision blurred and his head started to hurt and then he could barely breathe and he got up and he was stumbling towards the door and he couldn't breathe and he opened his door but he was short of breath and he dropped to his knees, gasping for breath. and then he was aspirating and he heard someone call his name and pressure on his chest and he wasn't sure if it was heaven or hell but there were the faces of the people he loved. his parents. hannah. beth. and he wanted to live. he didn't want to die anymore. and he needed them to know. and he was fighting, trying to dig himself up because it felt like he was buried alive and he clawed and punched and gasped and breathed until he was surrounded by machines and white and a hospital room and was choking on a tube. and his parents and sisters were there and all of them looked like they were crying. a nurse pulled the breathing tube out of his throat and informed the room that he was breathing on his own again. and josh started crying. and hannah and beth were on him, clawing at him as if he was the only thing that mattered and their parents were crying and telling him that they were sorry. and josh was crying, returning the hug. "i didn't mean to. i didn't want to." and he was sobbing and grabbing at every part of his sisters he could reach. "i didn't want to die. i don- i don't want to die." hannah and beth had removed themselves from josh's figure in the hospital bed, already informing their friends that josh was alive. melinda washington had sat down on the side of his bed, her husband behind her, a hand on his shoulder, his face a carefully curated mask. "mommy, i didn't want to die. mommy, please, i didn't want to die." josh was crying, begging, pleading. melinda washington knew they'd technically made a decision but seeing her son like this was different. but her husband wouldn't budge. melinda beckoned her daughters closer to prepare them but wondered if there was really a preparation for not seeing your brother, your son for at least a few months. bob was more than prepared to have joshua committed. she really wasn't but knew that there was nothing she could to do help him. so she went along with his decisions. just a few weeks, maybe months until they could see josh again.

[buckychristwrites]

About You | Day 12 | j.t.

Summary: Your job? Pop culture journalist for The Independent. Your assignment? To write a profile on the cocky footballer that you're publicly feuding with.

Word Count: 3.2k

Warnings: Cussing. Enemies to lovers

A/N: Please let me know what you think! :D side note, this gif is my fave thing that Jamie does in the whole show, im obsessed.

Masterlist | About You Masterlist | Main Blog

Smack.

Smack.

Smack.

With every newspaper that loudly hit, it was met with another jump from you, despite the fact that you knew they were coming. It had been a long morning, waking up early to catch the tube into the office, so you weren’t prepared for the loud noises this soon into the day, although you now knew more were to come. You stared at the headlines, reading each of them over and over again, as if you were trying to memorise them.

Tartt Seizes Mystery Girl’s Heart

Tartt Kiss: What We Know About The Footballer’s New Woman

Victory Celebration, Sealed With A Kiss

It was clear that the only reason the room was still silent was because a response from you was expected. You really didn’t know what there was to say. Scanning the words, you smacked your lips together before speaking.

“They’re not particularly clever.”

Your boss was whatever the exact opposite of enthused was, evident by his severe stare and the fact that he hadn’t sat down for a single second since you had entered his office.

“This funny to you?” He demanded, rotating his laptop to display an article that had your name and picture featured. An article you had already seen and gone through the 5 stages of grief over. “It’s funny that they know exactly who you are and why you were there?” You shrugged, a fire burning in your chest.

“They wouldn’t have known why I was there if you hadn’t posted the announcement of the profile without checking with me first.” 

His round face was turning a bright purple, but you remained nonchalant. These meetings were so much easier for you to swallow when he made it so easy to argue. At the very least, it gave you the entertainment of seeing him so mad. This time, however, it felt different. You could feel it, and you know he did too. Leaning into his palms, which were pressed against the top of his desk, he towered over the newspapers. Despite the fact that there was still a decent amount of space between you and him, you still instinctively leaned away from him.

“What the fuck were you thinking?”

You didn’t look at him.

“I’m thinking that it was a football match, and excitement was high, and I’ve been spending a lot of time with Jamie Tartt, and maybe he wasn’t thinking very clearly.” It wasn’t entirely a lie. Although it definitely wasn’t entirely the truth, either. He began to nod as he grabbed his phone and began to type. A few seconds passed before he was sliding it across the desk to you.

“And what about that?”

Looking down, you saw the picture from Jamie’s instagram of you walking in his jersey, something you had totally forgotten about. A hot flash shot through you.

“I just borrowed some clothes. I walked to the stadium and it started raini-“ You stopped when your boss viciously waved you off.

“Don’t fucking disrespect me right now,” He said angrily, snatching his phone back. “Spotted wearing his clothes. Pictured exiting his car with him at the Charity Gala. What the fuck is the matter with you?” Your fingers were in your lap, pulling at each other. Even though you were telling the truth, there was no sense in continuing to defend yourself. His mind had been made up.

Within the hour of the match ending, you had received an email from your boss, telling you to come in for a meeting first thing in the morning. You took the tube in, which gave you plenty of time to settle your nerves. As much as you could, anyway.

Your boss began to yell about professionalism, and how you lacked it, while you thought of Jamie. No real conversation had occurred after The Kiss, as he got swept away by the team, and you found yourself being crowded by paparazzi and journalists as you tried to follow. It took two hours to go home, needing to take several detours to fend off the extra persistent ones. After that, you avoided your phone like the plague. It was blowing up with texts and calls from friends and relatives, asking if the pictures they were seeing were of you. Maybe there had been a text or two from Jamie as well, somewhere lost in the mix, but the fear of looking at your phone kept you from them. Instead, you had spent the night at home in solace, and worked on the article.

Your boss went silent for a while, pulling you from your thoughts. His fingers were white against the back of his chair, making you wonder when he moved there from the desk. Finally, he shook his head.

“I’m pulling you from the profile.”

Your spine straightened with the speed of a whip.

“You can’t do that,” You said in shock. He began to shake his head again, but you continued. “I did nothing wrong.” 

“You did everything wrong,” He spat. “You couldn’t be fucking professional. Sleeping with the fucking person you’re writing on. Disgusting. I’ll email you when I decide who will take over, and you’ll send them your notes.” The urge to cry was creeping up your throat, but you swallowed it down.

“I won’t be sending anyone shit,” You told him in a firm voice. “I’ve been working on this for almost two weeks. Do you know how hard I worked to get Jamie to trust me? After everything I’ve said in the past?” At this, he laughed. 

“Worked him real good, you did,” He said.

The comment felt like a strike to the face, and you leaned even further away from him. All you could see was red. You opened and closed your mouth a few times, his pleased smile only growing with each attempt to come up with something snarky or angry to say. A sort of acceptance washed over you as you knew what needed to be done.

“I fucking quit then.”

Now, the shock was on his face. 

“You’re quitting over Jamie fucking Tartt?” He shouted as you rose from your seat. You contemplated this answer before looking at him again, your face blank. 

“You’ve made me wish to quit over a lot less, if it makes you feel any better.” 

The yelling immediately began to commence once more, but you were already closing the door behind you. It didn’t take long for you to empty out your desk, as you really didn’t bring a lot of personal items to work, and before you knew it, you were at the train station with a box of assorted belongings and a spot in the unemployment line. 

The tube was mostly empty, just a few scattered people throughout the car. You took a spot in the back, setting the box in the space next to you while you sat against the window. As the train took off, you lost yourself in thought.

Where to go now? Over the years, you had yearned to move on from The Independent, much like Trent did, but had never bothered to try. Complacency and fear can really hold a person down. It was hard enough landing the job there, how hard would it be now to find a new one? Especially with the tainted reputation you now held? You absolutely couldn’t get any sort of reference from your old boss. Hell, he’d probably have you blacklisted from all major outlets before the day was out.

Looking at the empty seat that held your belongings, you were hit with deja vu. 

You can lay on down if ya want. Grab a few winks.

His voice echoed through your mind, bouncing off the walls of the train car. Your head fell back against the seat. Your body ached at his absence. You missed him horribly, and were angry about the things you missed out on. That you didn’t spend the day laughing with him. That there were so many things left unsaid still. That you could still feel the ghost of his lips on your own. 

You imagined him sitting next to you, and what he would say if he were there. 

Fuck ‘em. You don’t need them. You’ll be alright, love.

Your heart lurched at the thought as you came back to reality, greeted by the sad, grey box that held your belongings. You closed your eyes. It wasn’t the same. It felt like nothing would be again. 

But it had to be. Right?

Pulling out your phone, you went to call him to appease the yearning for his voice, but then froze. You didn’t want to call him. You wanted to see him.

You switched to another contact, typing and sending a message faster than your brain could process it. The response came quicker than expected, although you wouldn’t have been surprised if you hadn’t gotten one at all. A sigh fell from your lips as you stared out the window. Anxiety built in your belly, but you knew soon, it would all feel better. At least, you were hoping it would.

When you got off at your respective stop, you were determined as you rushed out. Your foot was on the first step to go up to the street when you paused. Turning, you ran to the first rubbish bin and threw the box on top. It didn’t quite fit, but you still left it. A few people gave you looks as you ran up the steps, some due to your strange behaviour, others because they recognized you from the pictures of you and Jamie in the press. You kept going.

You didn’t mean to run the whole way. But you did. Mostly due to the urgency you felt, but also partially because it was raining so hard that you felt like the streets would flood and carry you away. There was something cathartic about it. Maybe not to your heart, but to your mind. You slipped on the sidewalk a few blocks from the Underground station, almost falling straight into the cement had it not been for the lamppost next to you. It took a second to straighten up again, but once you were, you continued to run.

Within twenty minutes, you were walking down the residential street, rain continuing to pour. Your chest hurt from the running, as it wasn’t something you did with any sort of regularity. With every house you passed, you looked at the numbers on each one, searching for the one from the text. It was hard to see, with the rain and all, but you felt desperate enough, even going so far as to approach porches to properly read them.

It wasn’t the house number that alerted you to his house, however. It was his car, parked in the driveway. Your feet froze at the sight of it, remembering in vivid technicolor the rides you and him shared inside of it. The first one being under similar circumstances as you were in right now. The nerves were really building, as you stared the car and realised you were really at his house, and you wondered if you made a mistake. Wouldn’t it have made more sense to just return his calls? Instead of showing up, unannounced, in the pouring rain? 

Am I stupid? You asked yourself. Am I actually insane?

But you still found yourself approaching the door, your feet moving as if they were being magnetically pulled forward. It was nice to finally be out of the rain. You thought of the box in the bin back at the tube station. Did someone else take the belongings for themselves? Or would it end up in the landfill? Not that it mattered now. It was filled with things you’d never need again. 

You closed your eyes, thinking of the last two weeks. So much had happened. More than you ever would’ve predicted when you were given this assignment. And it all led to this moment, here, on Jamie’s porch, with you covered in rain water, heart full, and ready to share those feelings with him. After another brief moment to allow yourself to calm down, you lifted your hand and knocked one, two, three times on the door. 

As the seconds passed, you felt your heart begin to race. Is he not home? Maybe he went out with the team? Or out to the shops? You knocked again, a little faster, more urgent this time. More time ticked by, and nothing happened. Tears sprang into your eyes. Was this a sign? You checked your phone, ignoring your growing inbox as you went to Jamie’s text thread. Nothing new. Stuffing the phone back in your pocket, you gave the door another sorrow filed look. Would another knock be enough? 

No. Either he’s not home, or he doesn’t want to see you, you told yourself. It was that simple. 

You all but ran back into the rain, your head down and your spirit crushed. The walk home wasn’t a far one, although you assumed that by how many times Jamie had walked over to your place. Over the sound of the drops hitting the sidewalk, you thought you heard the sound of footsteps, but that was confirmed when you heard someone yell your name from behind.

Jamie Tartt stood before you, already soaked from the storm. He looked a mixture of pleased and confused to see you. His hair was back in the usual headband, sporting a black hoodie and joggers. 

“I was on the toilet,” He explained his delay, looking sheepish. You nodded, not caring for a single second what he had been doing. Just happy he was there now. Just you, him, the pouring rain and the bristling trees. 

“They pulled me from the profile.”

His face fell immediately, and he took a step forward. 

“Because of…?” He asked, trailing off. You nodded, causing him to pinch his chin between his fingers. “If I’d known, I wouldn’t have… I’m so sorry.” You shook your head at him, waving your hands in the same rhythm.

“Did you mean it?” You asked him. “The kiss. Did you mean to do it?”

He looked conflicted, like this was a test. Maybe he feared that you were asking in hopes that you could answer to get the article back. Or maybe he was worried that you regretted it terribly and wished that he did. 

“Yes.” It was so firm, so definitive. “I don’t regret it at all. I’d do it again. And again. And again.” You smiled widely, convinced that you’d never stop smiling again.

“I quit.” 

The curtain of rain didn’t hide the absolute shock that filled his face. You nodded.

“My boss implied that I slept with you to get you to trust me,” You explained. A beat passed and you tilted your head. “Actually, he just flat out said I slept with you to get you to trust me. So I quit. And I took all of my notes with me. So they’ll have to do everything over.” He ran a hand through his wet hair, shaking his head.

“I’m-” He stopped, his eyes squeezed shut as everything processed. “You…”

“I quit my fucking job for you,” You said, speaking loudly but slowly, so that nothing could be uncertain. You took a step forward. “I was miserable. I didn’t want to accept that, but I was.” You laughed, remembering how it felt to hate going into work. It felt like a lifetime ago, considering how happy you had been these last two weeks. “Then I got to interview you, and I remembered why I love writing and journalism in the first place. I quit my job so I can fucking kiss you whenever I fucking want to and not worry about what my boss has to say, or what people who have read my past articles about you have to say. Because I was wrong about you. I know that now.” You shrugged. “And maybe I’ll never get to write another article again, but I’ll get to kiss you, which I think is a good trade off.” 

A long time passed where he just stared at you, wide eyes and chest breathing heavy. Finally, after letting you sit in agony for a second too long, he took three quick strides towards you, pressing his hands to your cheeks and his lips were against yours once again. Your eyes closed instantly as you faded into the kiss. It was different this time, with more passion behind it, but the adrenaline that filled you was the same. You put one hand on the back of his head, curling your fingers in his hair, your other hand balling the front of his shirt in your fist. 

When he pulled away, he pressed his forehead against yours. The rain was freezing against your skin, yet you were warm.

“It’s funny,” He mumbled to you. “I learned how to behave meself in public, and now you’re out of a job. You were right.” You immediately pulled your head away from his, staring at him with a look of disbelief.

“Are you choosing this moment to make fun of my unemployment?” You demanded, as he laughed. “This exact moment? Right now, you felt it would be the time? After I just said all that nice, romantic stuff to you?”

He kissed you again, and you could feel him smiling against your lips, his body shaking in silent laughter. You wished this moment would last forever. Just kissing in the rain while smiling and laughing in between. No other problems but getting too cold. 

You broke the kiss this time, him leaning after you as if he wasn’t ready for it to end. A slight pout was on his lips, but he recovered quickly.

“How’d you get me address?”

“Got it from the highest bidder,” You said jokingly. He furrowed his eyebrows together, and you laughed. “I asked Roy.” His laugh seemed to fill the entire neighbourhood. 

“He’d give me address to all the homeless men in London if he could, so I ain’t surprised,” He admitted. You scrunched up your face.

“I don’t like being compared to the homeless men in London.” 

“No,” He said in agreement. “You’re much better.” Reaching forward, he brushed a chunk of wet hair back into place, his fingertips brushing against your forehead. His expression was tender. You were still in shock that this was happening at all.

You gave his lips another peck.

“If money were no object, what would be one thing you’d do?” He shook his head at you continuing your game.

“I’d spend the rest of me life with you.” 

You bit the inside of your cheek. 

“You don’t need any money for that.”

His eyes were staring into yours, twinkling despite the lack of light. 

“We’re gonna need money for a hospital visit if we don’t get inside,” He said, grabbing you by your damp sleeve and dragging you towards the door. It made sense. There wasn’t a single part of you that wasn’t wet, and Jamie looked about the same.

“Well, I don’t know if you knew, but I’m not gonna have money for anything coming up soon,” You told him. “So if I would have to just die at that point.” 

“Don’t worry, love,” He said as he opened the door, gesturing for you to go inside. “I won’t let anything happen to ya. Not ever.”

He shut the door behind you, and for the first time, in what felt like a long time, you didn’t need that reassurance.

You had already known he would.

[epwritten]

T a s t e ~ l.f

"Just look at me baby, day and night"

Description: You want what you're afraid of getting. You both play this game of want and desires, temptations, and limitations, secrecy, and need.

Word count: 8K. Hehehe. 😬

Author's note: I got into Stray Kids late summer last year, so there's a lot of performances I'm still getting into. But a week ago I saw Taste for the first time and...wow. When I first watched the Taste performance, everything was running through my mind at once. It was the perfect showcasing of temptation, where me -a usually by-the-rules person - had thoughts that were uncontrollable. I've never seen anything quite like that before, where in the moment I was so captivated. This concept came immediately after watching the video late hours into the night.

Additional notes: AU kind of...even though they're Danceracha, they're not members of Stray Kids. They're three college friends trying to make it by, making music.

Another note! This can be a little toxic, but the whole gist of this one shot is to showcase what temptations between people really look like, especially if you have one who grew up under strict conditions and now goes through inner conflict of whether or not they should throw away their restrictions for a chance. I don't want there to be anything that upsets anyone as they read this. It wasn't my intention honestly!

AND MOST IMPORTANT!

There's no smut in this. I'm not comfortable writing it. I know this one shot more ofc focuses on temptation and what that feels like, but I'm just not comfortable so please don't expect it and then get mad when you've reached the ending and there's nothing aha <3

Okay that's it! Happy reading! Hope you will enjoy <3

To lay it out in simple terms, you were drowning.

No, not literally. But it felt so much like it.The place had a way of heightening all of your five senses in one setting. You always found yourself playing the senses game with your dad when you were young. He may have forgotten about it, but you carried the habit with you, even if it was subconsciously. You always observed the five senses in a place and how that made you feel. Sometimes it was for safety measures, identifying what in an unknown room could be your shelter. Other times it was a reflection of happiness, if you were at the beach or somewhere that you could not count all your senses aligning in the best way.

But sometimes, on a night like tonight for instance, it was out of nerves.

Smell: The scent of expensive perfumes from those in the room lingering in the air.

Hear: The noises of conversations in and out of your ear through everybody else who was in the room.

Touch: Your pulse, right under your neck, a signal of nervousness when things got too overwhelming.

See: The lights dimmed in perfect blue, everything dark and rich in color that you may as well have been drowning with the wave of shade plastered and flashing shadows where the lights loomed.

Everything about this atmosphere was tempting, inviting, alluring. You could feel the vibration of the bass, on the floor right where your foot was planted, but also buzzing in your chest. You knew needed to breathe. But nothing was working with your senses anymore, almost as if they were too far gone, lost in this place of entrapment.

Why did you decide to come?

You were definitely out of place, you considered, as you craned your neck trying to look for something and nothing at the same time. People were chatting and laughing and you wondered if being social was a game of pretend that everyone aced at, or an actual skill. Nobody even looked bored before an event would start. It amazed you so. You on the other hand, always hated to be so early to places where you had no other choice but to socialize before the main events arrived. Yet for this specific night, you didn't dare arrive late. You didn't want to admit it out loud, but you didn't want to miss...him.

Great. Your mind was doing it again. Thinking about what you vowed not to think of. But there it was, a delicate subject you didn't want to tempt with thought and imagery, but it pulling you in.

Him, with his dark eyes, a stare that captivated you, and seemed to control all of you- your mind, your body, your soul. He was dangerous to what you thought held your convictions for so long, the definition of what you couldn't cross and somehow you did. Though not really. But still. The whole thing was rather...complicated.

Because it started with you, that night, three months ago. You didn't even know why you were there. Life was tough and you needed somewhere to escape to. Your friends always suggested a high scene that could make your feelings go numb for the evening, how the dopamine release would maybe even be good for you. You never considered it those days of your youth, but a few months back, you found yourself at a high scene of a nightclub under blaring lights.

~ 3 months ago ~

Even though you were in your early 20s, it was your first time, so of course you felt out of place. Did people actually enjoy this?

That night was a night of many firsts. A stranger sauntered over to you and asked to buy you a drink. You didn't realize that what happened in the movies you saw could actually take place in real life. People were making out in the back corner- full on, not caring if anyone else was looking, and not getting a room anytime soon. The music was loud. There were so many people, so many stories. But, you all were strangers to each other, and that was the pep talk you told yourself.

You were a stranger. Whether you were actually shy and timid or confident and sexy, no one would know the difference. It was one night in this nightclub. You could be anyone you wanted to.

You could also meet anyone you wanted. And that's what you did.

He was on the top floor when you first saw him, manspread on the purple lounge couch. There were two other guys with him, one with brown hair and the other with blue hair but you barely noticed. Even when they stopped talking to each other and eyed you as you got to the top of the staircase, searching for a place to sit, your eyes only zeroed in on one.

See: Jet black hair, dark eyes, pale skin, wearing all black. He was the most beautiful person you could ever see. His features were pretty, but his stance was dominant and you couldn't help but let your mind run with thoughts that normally didn't cloud your vision. But this night was meant to be different anyway, at least, that's what you were trying to tell yourself.

You swallowed before you spoke out. "Am I allowed to sit here?" You asked, because for some strange reason no one else was up in the balcony seats, just those three men.

The man in the middle of the couch smiled before he shifted in his seat, moving to the other side of the couch.

"Of course you are. Come sit."

Hear: His voice was lower than expected, a velvety tone with a certain accent, though he didn't say enough words for you to realize which one it was. Your heart churned deep in your chest as you slowly walked towards them. You sat down right where the middle man patted and immediately you were hit with the scent of his cologne.

Smell: A hint of springtime but spice of power.

When you sat by him, the two other guys that were there wandered off, leaving you and the middle man alone. They made no excuses and walked out like it was no big deal. You didn't want to disturb any of them, but they were out of your hair by the time you sat.

You couldn't help but sneak a glance at who was sitting right by you on the couch. The music was blaring, lights were dimmed but luminescent enough so you could see the sparkles around his eyeliner and the color tint on his lips. He looked incredibly unreal, just sitting there.

And then he looked at you.

It was strange. You would be the person who would look away instantly, blush constantly and find something to fidget with, causing so much of a distraction to reduce the heat on your cheeks and color on your face. But right there in that moment, you didn't look away, you stared right back.

You didn't know anything about him, but you remembered how when you first walked into the club you said to yourself that you wanted a change. That you could be whoever you wanted, and no one would know anything different. He wouldn't know anything of your shy nature, the innocent image that so many mocked you about, he wouldn't know.

"Can I get you a drink?" The man asked finally, his pupils looking so intensely at your soul you thought he was genuinely lost in them. He was attentive, that was noted.

You shook your head. You've never drank before. Even though tonight would be the night of promises to live young and not overthink everything, you were still nervous for the substances.

"I'm good. Thank you though." You answered.

He nodded understandably as he sat up straighter. "Ah, that's okay." He said.

"I've never seen you here before. Are you new to the city?" He continued.

It was when he said that your heart started beating a bit more. Australian, that's what it was. He was definitely Australian.

He angled his body on the couch so he could face you properly. Though you were shy among his gaze, and had trouble fully looking at him.

"I've been here, I just..." You paused. You didn't want to seem like such a fool if you were to say that you've never been in a nightclub before. The man looked around your age and it would be somewhat embarrassing.

So you lifted your eyes and looked at him.

"I just never got to actually talk to you before." You said.

The man blinked before he leaned forward, a hand brought his chin as he gazed at you. "You've seen me here, but you never talked to me?"

You swallowed but wanting to keep going with the act. You told yourself in your mind not to care. So what if you flirted a little bit? Anything that would comment for this man would be truthful anyway.

So you scanned him with your eyes, taking everything in before you spoke out.

"Well...you're the sexiest person I've ever laid eyes on, so it'd be difficult..." Your voice trailed off.

Oh goodness. Did you really just say that out loud?

The man raised an eyebrow, but his smirk said otherwise. "Sexy, yeah? That's what you think of me as?"

When he repeated your words back, it made you suddenly shy, looking away. How did people at clubs do this? Were they always that forward?

He looked like he was okay with it, but you couldn't keep this front and confident act much longer. But you wanted to. You so wanted to just forget about your worries and let the night take its course.

"Hey," He chuckled warmly. "Don't go shy on me now." He said, eyes never leaving your face.

So you didn't. You took a deep breath and looked back at him. "Yes, that's what I think of you. You're sexy."

Being forward left a weird taste in your mouth, but the way he looked at you said so much at the same time. It fed you, fed your emotions. Because you could see that your words were the ones to cause him to smile, despite the shyness wanting to creep up on you.

"Thank you." His voice was a low decibel of temptation. He let his eyes travel down past your eyes for a split second before centering back on your face again.

You blinked and took a shallow breath, trying to ease the thundering beat in your chest.

The man then smiled genuinely and you swore you never saw anything more unreal. He looked kissable. You wondered what kissing him would feel like.

Where did that thought come from?

"You're a little shy, aren't you?" He guessed, reading your like a book.

Touch: You crossed one leg over the other, accidentally brushing his leg with yours and you quickly drew it back. You were failing your confidence but the way he looked at you...there was really no chance.

He chuckled when you didn't respond. "Don't be, get comfortable. What's your name?" He asked.

You said it and he repeated your name to himself before he nodded. "It compliments you. You're just as beautiful if not more."

And there came the butterflies once more.

You turned to him, trying to come back to look into his brown eyes. "What's your name?" You threw the question back to him.

"Felix." He answered, giving you his hand to shake.

It wasn't the most unexpected name for this midnight prince of a man. If anything, it was pretty attractive.

Around you both the music still blared and you started to feel your mind drifting back to the scene around you with your senses. But you wanted to be present and looked back at Felix with a question in mind.

"So...why are you here tonight?" You asked, trying to attempt conversation.

Felix looked up at the ceiling and then around. "Honestly...I'm performing on that stage in a minute." He said, looking behind him.

You did a double take when you saw the stage. "On...the pole?"

Felix shook his head and laughed. "No, no. A couple of friends and I we dance and make music, and then we perform at clubs."

Your face flushed. "Oh."

That was it. You were done. Embarrassed. You would try to take a cab and leave and never return. Possibly leave the country. Never be seen again. Burried in a hole. Whatever worked.

You didn't realize you were actually spacing out and planning a disappearing act until you felt a strong but soft touch on your arm. You averted your gaze and saw Felix shooting a soft smile.

"Why are you here tonight?" He asked.

It was very much of a good question. You wanted to know yourself. Life was being a lot. You needed a change of scene. You wanted to check out the club. You wanted to not let your worries cloud your mind. You were a rigid person and you imagined what it would be like to, for one moment, live more freely.

But you weren't about to go into the details of it all. You still were assigned one task, and that was let go.

"Because...I want to see you perform." You answered softly.

Felix blinked in surprise before he smirked, his hand patting your leg.

"Good girl." He muttered.

Hear: The words "good girl", over and over in your head from now until morning. You didn't know what to do with yourself.

Felix suddenly stood up and you looked at him, your heart beat picking up in haste."Wait, where are you going?" You asked, confused.

Felix glanced at the stage and then back at you, his eyes daring. "Going to be the reason why you came here tonight, of course. You should watch the stage." He winked and then walked away, going down the stairs, not looking back once.

He was so mysteriously sexy, so captivating, that you didn't know if your mind was held straight. You were thinking a million thoughts, imagining instances that past you would never do. On and on were piles of debating in your head between the two. The familiar innocence you vowed to protect, or the risking image that didn't care who you were, allowing you to dive deep into someone else. Maybe someone you were all along.

You couldn't think much because soon the music died down and you walked to the rail of the balcony, looking down. You technically could've gone down, but there were so many people. You liked having the space to yourself. It made you observe.

And when Felix and his two friends were finally on stage and danced, you were absolutely stunned. The other two were passionate, of course. The one with the blue hair was like blazing fire and then other with brown hair like sharp ice. Yet Felix had a power to him, an aura that was unshaken. He moved effectively and gracefully at the same time.

Their small set ended, only a couple of songs before the three went back upstairs and joined you as the stage was getting ready for exotic dancers. You stood up, wanting to pull Felix aside. When Felix saw you, he smiled, sauntering over to you.

"What did you think?" He asked in a low tone, reaching you.

You looked at him, truly. Beads of sweat formed on his forehead and his hair was slightly messier from the dancing. He was breathing hard, staring at you. It made you feel vulnerable of the true thoughts in your mind. You wondered just this once, how he would react if you were direct.

"I think you're a dangerous temptation." You finally answered bluntly, stepping into his space.

Felix raised an eyebrow. "Really? I'm a dangerous temptation, how so?" He asked, though his voice was smug.

He was taller than you but he crouched down, leaning forward so he could be at eye level with you.

You took a deep breath. "Because..." Your voice trailed off as you noticed a strand of hair covering his eye. You wanted to see his eyes. Without thinking you moved his escaping strand away, brushing it behind his ear. But it wasn't until you felt your fingertips reach the side of his face and saw him staring at you, not backing away either, gave you a weird longing.

What if tonight nothing mattered?

What if you could just be?

Felix stepped closer to your space, looking down at you. When he watched your hand slowly run through his hair, you caught him biting his lip subtly, but to you it was so hot.

He said your name then, eyes on you. When you looked at him, as the blue lights shone on his face, you could see a dark look in his eyes, it was calling you.

"Do you wanna get out of here?" You asked lowly.

A night of first experiences. It started with the drink offering, it continued with the flirtatious comments, and now it came to this point. You may have imagined the possibility of 'what if', but now it was your reality.

You just asked the hottest man in this whole club if he wanted to leave with you. That was something you never imagined yourself to do.

You looked to the side for a second, but the moment that you would want to second guess, a gaze of his would send darts to your heatt, causing it to beat rapidly in response to how he was looking at you. A wave of intensity and suddenly fear of regret if the night didn't happen, rushed through your soul.

"My place or yours?" Felix asked. His voice was even deeper if that made sense, filled with need.

"Yours." You said immediately.

~Present Day ~

You glanced on the watch on your arm, and then looked back to the stage. It was empty, the smoke machine clouding your vision. The playlist in the background was loud, the stero basically right in front of you. But what did you expect, you were front row.

You wondered where he was, maybe backstage with Hyunjin and Lee Know. You recalled when you first formally met the two, a few days after the first night you met Felix. It was a hang out, he called it, where a bunch of his friends and him were grabbing drinks and he wanted to see you again. He also wanted to talk to you. You didn't know why you said yes. He was supposed to be a stranger you'd know for one night, and then you both would leave each other and never see each other again. But of course, knowing your luck, it could never happen.

That night, the first one where after his set, you both left the venue not looking back, nothing actually happened. You were a virgin, you were raised strictly under rigid parental rules, you never drank or did drugs, you haven't had a first real kiss, you've never had any guy talk to you let alone bring you to their place, and you were scared regardless. But you wanted him. You didn't know why, but you wanted Felix so much.

~3 months ago~

Your foreheads pressed against each other. You felt his hands grab your face but you let your head stay around his. You could feel him all around, inhaling his scent. You were in his room, in his bed and yet...nothing. Sure there were touches here and there, kisses peppered down your neck, but you were so nervous. In the heat of the moment, being in the club with the blaring lights, electrifying music and sensual atmosphere it was easy to not think and let go. But right there in Felix's house, things were more difficult to navigate.

"I...don't know." You admitted softly.

Felix sighed, planting a kiss on your forehead once more. When he departed, he looked at you, and then ran his hands down your arm.

"If you don't want to do this, we don't have to." He said.

You glanced at the bed. It was soft, inviting, right there. And that was Felix was well. He was right there.

You looked down at your lap. "I want to, but...i- I don't know."

Felix remained quiet, nodding. When you saw his understanding you rested your arms around his neck, giving him some physical consolement. He breathed in deeply, eyes closed for a second before he leaned in once more and kissed the side of your chin. You hitched out a gasp.

"You want to but you don't know." Felix repeated your words against your skin.

He had a tendency of doing that, of throwing back the words you said so that you could hear echo in his voice. It was a shot of questioning if you were really sure. But it was so attractive coming from him.

Without even realizing it, you slightly tilted your head to the side, allowing him the access. His hands traveled down to your waist and as the kisses went deeper he found grip in your hips. A slow hand creeped, under your shirt to touch your bare skin. But as you felt his touch your eyes opened and you moved in your seat.

"Felix...I..."

You didn't want Felix to get annoyed. Every time you initiated something, he would respond to it, then you chickened out. You were sure that back in the club there were a lot of people who would want to spend the night with Felix.

You were the one that asked him, and now that it was happening you're nervous and indecisive?

You shook your head, feeling stressed out. It shouldn't be this stressful. Either you wanted it or not.

"I'm sorry." You apologized in a whisper.

Felix stared at you a little more. "What do you want from me, baby? What do you want me to do for you?"

~Present Day~

Two months and 13 days. It had been two months and 13 days since you've seen him. You were nervous as you craned your neck trying to look for something. You eyed the exit sign. You felt ridiculous. Surely you wanted to see this performance, but you were right up front, meaning Felix would see you.

He sent you an invitation, letting you know that he was going to be performing at an event. It wasn't even a bar or a club, it was an arts venue where people got the chance to display their talents and get scouted if they had the chance. You were proud of Felix, and Hyunjin and Lee Know. You knew that they were talented and worked hard.

You were curious for their song choice. Felix didn't say much when you asked him, just that it was written by the three of them inspired by true events. Then he told you it'd be special if you could make it, since it was inspired by you.

You never had a song inspired by you before.

You were going to go regardless. It wouldn't matter if they sang about bowling, whatever it was, you knew they would put on a show. But the fact that it was inspired by you...what part of you?

Would it be very direct and knowing? Did it include your name? Or was it slightly subtle, using certain words and symbolism that only made sense from the person that wrote it, and the muse.

Your heart beat at the thought. There was an anticipation growing in the air as the smoke machine from the stage traveled just about where you were. You breathed in deeply and closed your eyes. You were ready for whatever was to come.

~3 months ago~

It became on and off, like a tennis match.

Another night the guys performed at a bar. When their set was done, a lady with long brown hair and a sparkly black dress walked over to Felix and was talking to him across the room. She was smiling, using wild gestures and you're stomach flipped when you saw her hold on to his arm while laughing. Felix gave a smile and talked with her for a bit, nodding along to what she was saying.

You felt pathetic. Why did you think that you and Felix had something? There were rules and natures to the club scene. People weren't to be in contact with each other after a nightly exchange. So if you were the one Felix talked to that first night, that meant someone else would be the one the next time.

You got up from your seat abruptly, and Felix's eyes averted to you but you turned, picking up your purse, and then weaved your way through the crowd. You were done with the night. You needed to go back to your place and relax.

You left the bar and stood by the crossroad, waiting for the light to turn green so you could walk. As you looked up into the night sky, your eyes trying to adjust to the orange street lights in comparison to the darker theme shades in the bar, you heard footsteps behind you.

"She just wanted to say she liked our set. She works in the music industry."

It was Felix no doubt.

You shook your head and then shrugged. "Okay...? That's great."

"You don't have to be jealous about it, I'm not interested in her."

You weren't facing Felix, but you could hear the undertones of his voice and recognized the smug. He was enjoying this.

"I'm not jealous." You said.

Felix hummed. "You're not jealous, huh?" You could feel him walking closer to you.

"You must think so lowly of me." Felix's hand snaked around your waist and then pulled you closer with no effort.

"You left a whole bar, took all your stuff, just because I was talking to someone of the opposite sex. You don't think I know what's going through your brain right now, do you?"

You breathed in deeply, inhaling his scent once more. The close contact was driving you crazy but you kept your eyes to the signs, waiting for the signal for you to walk.

And then a kiss planted on the back of your neck. And another. And another.

"The way you look mirrors how I look at you. The way you think of me is what I think of you. How your body yearns for me is how my body yearns for you. You don't think I would know?" Felix's voiced out in a low purr in your ears, his breath fanning your skin.

Slow kisses peppered lightly on your neck and then traveled down to your shoulder.

"You're sexy when you get jealous. So innocent yet so possessive? It turns me on." Felix narrated, holding you up as you could feel tingles throughout the course of your body.

It should have been weird thinking that you were in the position outside for all the public to see as you waited at the crossroads, but you didn't mind. In a weird way it was almost thrilling? You wished that you could go home with him then and there.

But you couldn't. And just as Felix's left hand slid down your thigh, you took a step forwards moving away.

"Felix," You took a deep breath, and then faced him. "You know I can't." You said.

For the first time, he got quiet. There was a slight look on his face, a flash of something you couldn't depict before he looked at you.

"What do you want from me then?" Felix asked, once more, saying your name calmly.

"You undress me with your eyes but get all shy whenever I touch you. What are you leaving me with?" He asked.

You looked down. You figured you owed Felix the truth.

"I've never done...anything with anyone before." You admitted.

Felix nodded. "That's fine, I have no intention of taking something away from you if that's not what you want. But you've told me you wanted it. And you seduce me. You ask me to take you to my apartment. I can't think straight when I'm with you. And yet the moment we try, you're gone." Felix said, running fingers through his hair.

"You're confused." He added.

I blinked and then shook my head. "You're the one confusing me. I don't know what I want to do with you. I don't know what I want you to do to me. I imagine things and I want to experience it with you..." You let your voice trail off.

Felix brushed hair out of your eyes. "I want to do everything to you. But you're not helping me. And this innocent self of yours isn't innocent at all. You're a temptress." Felix kissed you once more right by your jaw, just where you felt your knees went weak.

But he left go before anything escalated. His eyes looked over your head and then he pointed. "If you really want to go, it's your walk now."

You turned and looked seeing that there was indeed the countdown for the street. Cars waited for you to cross, their gazes impatient. You looked back at Felix and then the light once more.

You may have been a 'temptress' but Felix was nothing more than a 'tempter' himself.

~Present Time ~

They were last. Of course they were last.

The event night had gone on, with amazing debuting artists and groups. You liked the music and enjoyed the varied dances. There were traditional styles, ballads sung, hip-hop numbers, rock...etc. It was a little bit of everything.

You almost forgot the main reason why you were here. You were enjoying the night way more than you had initially expected, but as the MC came on stage thanking everyone for coming, it was then you realized they were the showstoppers.

"We have one more group for you guys, they're performing an original never performed before, ladies and gentleman! You're the first to hear this so let's make sure it's extra special to them. Give it up for Danceracha!"

The audience cheered and your heart thundered as the room went dark, lights out for a second. You sat up straighter, your eyes never leaving the stage as you prepared for anything though you weren't sure for what to expect.

See: Blue lights. It was a deep hue, and with the visuals of bubbles on the screens surrounded the room as though the place was underwater. Three spotlights in light blue lines centered towards the three that move as soon as the song starts. Hyunjin to the left, Lee Know in the middle, and Felix on the right side. There were dancers around the stage in black, in a startup runners position but not moving.

Hear: The music started. F# minor. It sounded mysterious, alluring, matching the colors of the lights around. It's own kind of sexy but captivating in a way that would make anyone wonder what was to come.

The three danced with grace and flow, synchronizing with the beat. The intro played, your eyes looking to where he was.

And how could you not? He looked incredible in a deep indigo unbuttoned silk blazer atop a black tank top over black dress pants, accessorized in silver index rings for both his right and left hand, and a lock necklace over his chest. His black hair slightly growing a bit longer in the back, and fluffy front covering the sides of his face. He moved seriously, passionately, elegantly, and dangerously.

The backup dancers with them got up and the three starting walking to the center of the stage. Just as they started their formation, you heard the voice you unknowingly missed, the voice you craved.

Fake eyes open

또 속아버린 아픔

이참에 날 또

가지고 놀아줘

You took a deep breath. Even within the first lines you knew. You knew exactly what he was saying.

Lee know started singing next and you heard the softness of his tone.

Fake eyes open

또 속아버린 아픔

이참에 날 더

망가지게 놀아줘

Hyunjin came in third with the power of the song building up.

It's like bad red roses

향기에 미쳐 호흡이 ���빠짐

아름다움에 가려진 짙고 두꺼운 가시

Don't care about it 알고 있잖아

베일에 싸인 눈동자

헷갈린다면 지금 이 순간을

Lee Know sang once more in a falsetto.

즐겨 baby baby don't test me oh no

Baby baby don't get me wrong

The next sequence had Lee Know and the dancers lower themselves, immediately drawing the spotlight now to Felix as he sang the next part. People around you cheered.

거짓은 안 해 감히

의미 부여한 이 밤의

정답은 you can get me

오로지 you can get me

The music played then, no words excepted Lee Know vocalizing and the smoothness of their dance. Almost like they were swimming. Almost like you were drowning.

They all got up, Felix singing once more.

Yeah make you feel my love la la la

지금 너 come and taste me now

Yeah you better watch out

You're gonna like ah

그래 난 속삭여 la la la la

Hyunjin came back to the center, carrying the last of the pre-chorus as the beat was building.

너와 나 둘 사이의 거릴 좁혀

잠깐의 호흡과 맞닿아 true up

이 스윗한 공간에 빨라진 ah

이 스윗한 공간에 달궈진

The music came to a sudden stop, only the faint sound of a chimy instrument playing as Felix graced the center of the stage, eyes turning to you as he pointed.

Just look....at...me

The beat of the chorus came back strong as the room erupted with cheers. The dance had intensified, filled with electrifying motion that made your heart soar. They were so in sync with each other and yet knowing that what they were saying was inspired by you...it made you sit up straighter and clear your throat.

And then your breath was held when you saw them in hypnotic rhythm going down to the floor.

Just look at me baby, day and night

A single touch. Even though part of the choreography, you weren't ready for Felix's hand that drifted up his leg as his back arched slightly, head rolled back as he sang that line.

What on earth was he doing to you and why was it working so much?

Lee Know started singing the next part again as the ground work was now on their knees.

Don't make me bad make me bad

I'm addicted to you

Hyunjin sang the next part in a beautiful falsetto.

이미 길들여진 내 맘을 자극해

They spun, getting out of the position and were now standing along with the dancers as Lee Know sang the same line again, the beat dropping.

Don't make me bad

Bad

Addicted to you

In synchronized movement, all the guys on stage leaned to the side. It was when looking at Felix and seeing his hand go up to his face did you realize it was him singing the same way Hyunjin just did in a heavenly falsetto, as if he wasn't the one with a low sultry voice for the duration of the song.

시작해 버린 이상 내 게 아님 안 돼

The music started to quiet down, back to the soft purr of seduction like the intro of the song. All of the guys' movements flowed like water, breathing heavily but graceful and poised in a swimming-like manner. It was just the keyboard pad and the chimed-like instrument playing as each person took a step back, and then another. And as the dancers dispersed to the sides of the stage, Felix, Lee Know and Hyunjin held their ending pose as the music came to an end, centered on the stage.

The lights went to black and everyone throughout the room cheered. You could see people around you giving standing ovations yet you stayed unmoved trying to still your beating heart and finding a way to process everything that just happened in the span of two minutes.

Desire. Need. Yearning. Passion. Sensual images and thoughts running in your head. Throughout the performance, though still professional, Felix managed to make a way of giving you his personal show. No one in the building would ever think anything of it, but the words, the dance, the eye contact, everything was what you understood.

It was something the two of you danced with yourselves. Wanting to give in, but being afraid. Yet so separately wanting to find out what would happen...if...

You sat back for a long time, an aftermath of conversations were playing as your background music even though the song was still in your head. Felix was engraved there. The way he looked, the way he sounded, the way he moved...it was everything to you.

The MC came back saying that the night was still young and there would be the chance for everyone to start partying and dancing the night away. The groups that would be scouted would be announced the following few days, but to throw all the worries aside the MC invited people go the dance floor.

You stayed for a little bit, and then got up. You needed to wash your face. You didn't know necessarily what that would do but you needed something to help you feel loose? You were feeling courageously needy, but for the first time, you didn't want the feeling to shoot down once activated.

When you took a minute to yourself- even though it didn't help much- rinsing cold water on your face, you looked at your reflection in the bathroom window. Replays of the performance ran once more through your head. You couldn't help but feel a bit of pride, considering the fact that there were many young and pretty people who had eyes and could definitely see Felix as attractive, and yet...you were the one he was singing to.

You had to find him.

You stayed in the bathroom for about a minute more and wiped at the cold droplets on the sides of your face before you took a deep breath and walked out, going back to the main room. You stopped right at the entrance of the door, scanning the crowd. Felix could be anywhere. Perhaps backstage, maybe talking to people, or maybe....

Wait.

It was timely how you recognized him. Insane, really, because all down the far side he was basically a shadow. But you saw him. You saw at the far corner someone sitting by the back corner. Drink in hand, manspread on the wooden chair. His blazer was off, revealing his black tank top.

He was ruining you without even doing anything.

Surrounding him was a couple of other guys. They had black T-shirts on so you figured it was the some of the backup dancers.

You took a deep breath and then started walking. You awkwardly weaved your way through the dancing train of people before you got to the back of the room. When you reached the table, everyone turned. You felt nervous seeing that you were looking right at Felix after all this time of no contact.

"Um...we're gonna go to the floor. I'm sure you two have some catching up to do." One of the dancers said. He gave a knowing look at you and you wondered if he knew who you were.

Felix shot a smile, giving him a crisp dap and then a salut. "Okay, have fun." He wished.

His voice. How you missed the sound of his voice.

Felix waited a few extra seconds to see each of them leave you both before he averted his eyes to you. There was a story twisted with an airing confidence in his eyes.

"Didn't think you'd show." He said, now planting his elbow on the table. He leaned back, shamelessly staring down your low v-neck shirt. But you were shamelessly staring at his arms, playing at this game as well.

You shrugged. "I had to. I know how much this night is important to you."

Felix nodded, taking a sip of his drink before setting the glass down. "So..." He pushed his hair back, combing his fingers through it before he leaned forward.

"Did you like what you saw?" He asked.

You didn't want to sugarcoat it. You couldn't anyway.

"You were incredible. And the song...it was...it made me think of things..." You answered shyly.

Felix didn't say anything for a few seconds but you saw the corner of his lip lift in a small smirk.

"Yeah? What kind of things?"

You looked down, feeling the heat on your cheeks as your mind went wild. Imagining having Felix touch you, to whisper sweet nothings in your ear with his deep voice, to be the one you could experiment with. He sold that image during the performance, and you wanted nothing more than for him to carry that persona with you, behind closed doors, no one watching.

"Talk to me, baby. What's on your mind? I wanna know." Felix said, his eyes looking up at you in a strange innocent doe way, as if he wasn't the one in charge for setting your soul on passionate fire.

You breathed deeply, taking slow steps towards him. He was right in front of you now, though he didn't stand up and you didn't sit. You were looking down at him and Felix was looking up at you.

"It made me think of...you doing whatever you want to me..." You said.

Felix didn't make any quick movements but somehow he sat closer. He reached forward and hooked his finger to your belt loops, slowly reeling you closer.

"Is that so?" He asked, looking up at you.

You took a sharp intake of air, trying to hold it together. It wasn't even much but this gesture made you feel in need, like a glimpse of what could happen tonight with his control.

But suddenly Felix let go of his grip, his hands in the air in a surrendering position.

You looked at him confusingly. Why would he stop right there? Right when you began to feel once more like pottery clay molding into his hands.

Felix looked at you dead in the eye. "I'm not going to touch you at all, if you don't want this. Okay?"

You nodded.

"No, love, I need words. You got it?" His voice was firm and clear. It seemed to you he was done with mixed signals. And you understood him, because you were done too.

"Yes." You answered in a small voice.

Felix nodded once, licking his lips as he took in all of you. But just as he said, he stuck to the rules, folding his arms instead. You knew in this moment you had to be the one to take the first leap.

So you did something you've seen in movies a couple of times. You stepped closest to Felix and then brought your hand down to his chest, slowly. Felix took in a sharp breath, but still looked at you, challenging a continuation by your command. When you felt confident in doing so, you withdrew your hand from his chest slowly. Locking eyes with his, you nodded.

"I do want this. I'm not going to be like a light switch and annoy you, I truly want this more than ever. I want you." You said.

Felix looked at you and then looked around the room, and back at you. "You're sure?"

"Yes." You repeated, your voice louder.

Felix flashed a smile as he stood up, towering over you. He wrapped an arm around your waist and just when you were right in front of him you could feel his kisses finding their way across your neck, a familiar feeling you didn't know how much you missed.

But you didn't want your first time to be in a crowd as loud as this, barely hearing as the pop and EDM fill your eardrums.

As though sensing that, Felix pulled away, but lifted your chin so you were at eye level with him.

"I'm going to take you to my place, okay? Do you have your stuff?" He asked lowly.

You were so caught up staring at him, so close to your face, that you almost forgot what he asked. But you nodded, looking down at your purse. "Yeah, it's all here."

Felix nodded and then smiled at you in such an endearing way you could almost kiss him first at the sight.

You were breathing heavily, heart beating. The moment would soon be yours and you wanted to savor everything, remembering the exact feelings you had to look back on.

Felix didn't waste time placing a hand on your knee as he drove, caressing you ever so softly but enough to make you shiver in your seat. It was a reminder that you very much so were in his car and was going back to the place you hadn't been in months. Only, there would be a different ending with this time.

And when you arrived, you let out a small noise when he didn't even bother warning you, didn't even bother opening the lights, but he led you through the dark, entering his room. You faced the bed, knowing that tonight would be when it all would happen.

"You haven't changed your mind, no?" Felix asked, leaning against the drawer as he eyed you.

Why was he so effortlessly hot?

You shook your head and looked at Felix. "No." You said.

When you thought back to the performance, the words Felix said, how he sang, the daunting look in his eyes, you would be a fool to not take this opportunity and truly let go for the first time. And you wanted it to be Felix who would have his way with you, however he wanted it. You couldn't see it any other way.

"You're shaking."

"Oh am I? I didn't notice." You replied sarcastically, which made Felix chuckle.

"I missed you." He admitted, which made your heart flip.

"I missed you too." You repeated.

Felix slowly walked over, wrapping his arms around your waist from behind.

"Close your eyes and relax for me?" He whispered in your ear.

Hear: His low voice penetrated your being. Sultry and soothing but charming and the very thing that made you at his service and obey.

You closed your eyes immediately and felt his lips nuzzle your ear. But you let out a small giggle, squirming a little. You could hear Felix laugh behind you.

"It tickles?"

You just giggled in reply. You still keep your eyes closed. For a few seconds there's nothing, but right after you felt his arms wrap around your chest, holding you tightly as he presses his sweet kisses on the back of your neck once again.

Smell: The scent of his cologne was intoxicating, beckoning and surrounded you at the same time. You wanted to bathe in it.

You sighed deeply.

"Remember to breathe, yeah?" Felix advised, his lips moving on your skin.

"Yeah." Your heart fluttered and you exhaled.

Felix hummed, his hand grazing down your chest. "You're so..." His voice trailed off.

You waited, hesitant but curious as to what Felix thought of you. But after long seconds of nothing as Felix started to kiss down your shoulder, you turned your neck slightly, opening your eyes.

"I'm so...? What? What am I?" You asked.

Felix took your waist, and gently moved you so that you were now turned around and facing him. Strands of hair fell in your face in the process of sudden movement, and Felix smiled, pushing the strands back behind your ear.

"When there's a better word than tempting I'll use it, but until then, that's all I'll say." He whispered.

"You're tempting me." You let out in a small voice.

"I'm tempting you." Felix repeated. You now concluded that when he repeated your words, it was the hottest thing ever.

Felix tilted his head upwards, looking at you with daring eyes. "Do something about it?" He dared.

Oh. My. Soul.

You took a deep breath, looking down. You were still scared, even though there was something that enveloped you. A feeling of want and need mixted together, as though the aftermath wouldn't even matter as long as Felix was right in front of you, staring with the same look of desire.

Touch: Your hands slowly grazed his chest, slowly and tentatively pulling the hem of his tank top.

Felix eyed you as he licked his lips, as though blinking would make him miss something.

Your heart beat continuously, mind pressing with thoughts as you, once more, noticed the scene heighten your five senses.

See: No other eyes but his, looking at no one else but you. The glow after dancing on stage, the beauty that was present with his dark features. The intoxicating look of thirst in his gaze.

Hear: Breathing. Faint but heavy. You couldn't even tell if it was coming from you or him, but you could hear the tension.

Smell: His cologne. The scent of springtime with a spice of power.

Touch: The fabric of the tank top. Cotton, perhaps? You didn't know. You didn't care. You suddenly wanted it off.

There was once more sense, but the intensity of the moment was making you experience a sort of amnesia. It made you frustrated, those leading up moments where they were careful and with care, but also dropped with tension that would wanted to cut. It was like a dam just moments before it would burst. But now this was driving you crazy because....

What was that last sense?

Felix's beautiful lips parted when you felt his abs through the shirt. He held your head with his hands, his eyes solely fixated on your lips.

"Kiss me or leave me." He whispered, the words powerful enough to send a wave through your core.

And that was when it clicked. His song. The last sense.

Taste.

The taste of his lips on yours, crashing, furiously enough let your head fall back. He groaned against your mouth, holding the back of your hair with the palm of his hand. He tasted like cinnamon but also a hint of peppermint as well. He fueled you in a way that was better than any of your imaginations.

So like tonight, and 3 months ago when you both first met, you were drowning in alluring waters under the surface of where you temptations washed over you. But unlike the game of tug-of-war to your body and heart where you would win, tonight you let the rope go with no regrets. You knew that this night was where finally, all of your senses aligned gloriously, and that there was no other person who could give it all to you but Felix.

[bellysoupset]

Just a small Lukebell talk that I couldn't get out of my mind, not a sickfic. This happens before the fic "Max Meets The Gang"

---------------------------------------

"Hey handsome," Bella leaned against the doorway of their bedroom, opening a tired smile as her husband walked in, "you're home late, I was in bed already."

"Sorry," Lucas was pouting as he shut the door with his whole weight, undoing his tie, "the stupid dinner went on for forever."

She raised her eyebrows at his tone, Lucas never complained about work. He apologized for getting tied up, yes, but complain? Never, he loved it.

"Stupid dinner, yeah?" Bella walked closer, until she was in front of him and tiptoed, cupping his cheeks. He was warm and flushed, clearly a bit tipsy, "what's gotten your panties in a twist?"

He snorted at that, turning his face so he could press a kiss to the inside of her hand, "I don't know, I just wanted to be home like six hours ago and the thing wouldn't end..." he yawned, then opened a small smile, "I'm being a whiny baby, let's go to bed. You shouldn't be waiting me up."

"You know I don't sleep that early," Bella shrugged, but allowed him to throw an arm around her shoulders and pull her to his chest. She wrapped her arms around his waist as they waddled to the bedroom, "was your boss on your ass?"

"Nah," Luke let go of her as they entered the bedroom, starting to strip his clothes and Bella crawled back in bed, falling on her side and watching him move around. He was in a shitty mood, because normally Lucas did not make that much noise in order to get ready for bed. He was a fairly thoughtful dude and it was around midnight, not that she was too sleepy.

With a heavy sigh, he got in bed as well, kicking off the blankets and rolling so he could press his cheek to her chest, a position that had his feet sticking out from the end of the bed and Bella shaking with a chuckle. She moved her arm from under him, sinking her fingers on his dark hair and started to pet it, opening a smile as he let out an appreciative noise.

"There was a cute baby there," Lucas mumbled after a couple minutes of silence and Bella raised her eyebrows at the comment, her husband was not the type to really pay attention to kids, that would be Vince or Jonah, "curly hair like yours. I want one."

Maybe more than a bit tipsy then.

She let out a chuckle, "oh yeah? They must've been the cutest thing ever to make you say that," she squirmed slightly and Luke rolled off of her, falling on his pillow and on his side. Bella turned on hers as well, so they were nose to nose.

"Not as cute as ours would be," he wrinkled his nose and Bella let out a snort, pushing a wavy hair back and way from his eyes.

"Where are you going to put this metaphorical baby of yours, uh? The living room? This house barely fits us both, you dork," she rolled her eyes and Luke let out a heavy sigh, bumping his nose with hers.

"Then we can move to a bigger place. It makes no sense for us to be here anyway, Bell, we can afford a bigger place. Have a dog or a cat or both," he said it softly, stroking her cheek, but that didn't stop the ginger from frowning.

"You want to move?" Bella pulled back in order to look at him firmly and he hesitated for a second, before nodding.

"We outgrew this place, baby," Lucas said calmly, "a while ago, if you ask me. You know Leo calls it us roleplaying at being poor?"

Bella scoffed at that, moving away from him and sitting up against the headboard, crossing her arms to her chest and looking around the room. Realistically speaking she knew he was right. Their teeny tiny one bedroom house was a cramped place for one person, let alone two, and they had been sharing it for over a year now.

Yet... There was a little voice in her head that sounded an awful lot like his father, repeating gold-digger over and over. She chewed on her lip and startled slightly when she felt Lucas taking her hands in his, "Isa?"

"What prompted this conversation?" She asked, trying not to melt as he called her Isa, "one of your work buddies brought up where we live? What's up?"

Lucas frowned now, sobering up and sitting up, "are you implying I'm embarrassed of us?"

"Are you?" She was openly picking a fight, Bella knew it, but she couldn't help it. Kit Howard was whispering in her ear that one day Luke was going to wake up and realized he wanted better than her, that their whole romance was a phase.

"Isabella, listen to yourself," Luke rolled his eyes, sounding offended, "if I was embarrassed of us or where we live, I'd bring people around? I'd be happily living here for over a year?" he raised his eyebrows, "we're adults and we can afford a bigger place, why wouldn't we get one?"

Bella curled up, until she could hug her knees and his eyes softened at the movement, clearly realizing how insecure this conversation made her.

"Bell?"

"Over Christmas last year, when you were sick," she lowered her eyes away from his face, nervously picking at the blanket and removing imaginary lint, "your dad, he- He.." her voice trailed off and Bella shut her mouth.

Next to her, Luke let out a distraught noise, "he what? Did he say something? Did he do something?" his voice got a chilling note at the end and Bella snapped her head, shaking it from side to side. Kit Howard was a major asshole and he could be intimidating, but he hadn't touched her.

"He said you'd wake up one day and realize you could do better..." Bella mumbled, hugging herself, "and I know your dad is a jackass, but I can't help but think-"

"No," Lucas glared at her, "no. Look at me, Bella," he grabbed her chin, forcing their eyes to meet, "there's no but. My dad is an asshole and what he said isn't true. Period. He's a serial cheater who neglected his wife during her illness and who capitalized on her death. He's a shitty father and the one time I let him get in my head, I lost you and that almost killed me, so no. I'm not letting him come between us ever again."

Bella nodded, quietly, "I don't wanna go back to the apartment," she almost whispered and Luke pulled her to him, kissing the top of her head.

"Then we won't," he rubbed her back, "I'll sell it, we can pick a place together... If you're alright with it?"

Instead of answering, Bella curled up closer to him, nodding, "you promise me you're never gonna turn into him? No matter how badly we fight, no matter what happens...?"

"I'll never be Kit Howard," Lucas vowed, falling back against the pillows, "doesn't matter how badly we fight."

She melted in his embrace, pressing her nose to his neck and closing her eyes, "let's start with a dog before we level up to a whole child," Bella whispered and heard Luke chuckle, squeezing her closer.

"Yeah, that's fine by me."

[irondadfics]

Hello! I was wondering if you could find me a/some fics that have a seriously injured or very sick Peter that also have him going to the hospital? Thank you!

here’s some for you! Some are unfinished but still worth checking out

Friendly Fire by JolinarJackson

Finding a careful truce with the government, the “rogue Avengers” are allowed to return to the Compound where they are put under house arrest. Peter coming to spend one week at the Compound during his summer break couldn’t have come at a more inconvenient time as the opportunity to bond a little more with his mentor is overshadowed by a conflict he doesn’t quite understand. When he starts to develop a mysterious medical condition, however, the former team is forced to work together – not just to protect Peter’s identity from the DODC, but also to find the cause for his illness before it’s too late. “He’s my kid,” Tony said, his voice hoarse. “He’s my kid and I failed him.” He covered his eyes and took a few deep, shuddering breaths. “All I ever do is fail him.” Natasha knelt down in front of him and cupped his face in her hands, waiting for him to meet her eyes before she said, “Right now, he doesn’t need you to fix this. He doesn’t need you down here. He needs you over there, in the medbay, by his side.” She thumbed tears from the corners of his eyes and ignored the ones running down her own face. “You haven’t failed him yet.”

A Pair of White Converse by orphan_account

The subway car was quiet. Almost too quiet. Peter’s senses buzzed in the silence. A familiar shiver ran down his spine, and his muscles clenched reflexively. There was danger, his spidey-sense told him that much. But where? Someone sneezed into a tissue before clearing their throat gruffly, and the noise grated in Peter’s over-sensitive ears. A woman in a business suit chattered away on her phone, her voice brusque and commanding. She reminded him of Pepper when she was in a meeting - poised, well-aware of the power she held. Somebody was tapping their nails against the hard plastic of the empty seat beside them in a steady rhythm, almost like a countdown. Tap-tap-tap, tap-tap-tap, tap-tap-tap. ~~~ TRIGGER WARNING: if something about bombs or explosions on trains triggers you, then please don't read. Take care of yourself.

Happy Binky, the big-ass bunny by Bergen

Even Spider-Man had his limits. One of those limits was a fall from over a hundred feet, that left him with a cracked skull, a broken spine and a severely crushed left leg. Spider-Man is recovering and out of the running. But he gets no rest. Because now, Peter Parker is facing his greatest threat so far: his aunt’s new boyfriend, Happy. And everyone says Happy is a good guy. Happy is a good guy. So Peter isn’t sure why the whole thing makes him feel on edge.

That's why they call me mr. fahrenheit by SparrowFlight246

Peter’s on fire. He wakes up fast, and before he even gets the chance to feel the pain, the aches, the dizziness, he feels the heat. It’s all encompassing, a raging inferno blooming from within him and burning him up from the inside out, and god, it— —god, it hurts. - Peter gets whammied by a 24-hour superbug, and Tony’s left to keep him alive until tomorrow morning. It sounds a hell of a lot easier than it ends up being.

If You Should Die Before Me (Reserve Me A Place In Heaven) by Aurealis

Peter is locked in a flooding cave in and Tony tries to rescue him.

How They Perceive You by ephemeralstark

Peter couldn't finish as the doors to the room they were in flew open and a shaky “you can't go in there,” could be heard.  “Hey, Underoos, fancy meeting you in here!” Mr. Stark said cheerfully, although Peter could see the tenseness in his jaw and the hardness in his eyes that made him mentally groan.  “M-Mr. Star’.” Peter mumbled in greeting.  “Mr. Stark, you can't-”  “-be in here.” Mr. Stark said, interrupting Dr. Kat. “I know, they told me, but judging by what I can see here, it’s a good thing I ignored everyone. That won’t work on him.”  “It’s anaesthetic.”  “I know.” Mr. Stark said. “And it won’t work on him, he’s a funky thing, aren’t you Underoos?”  - Peter's lung spontaneously collapses and Happy does the only thing he can - takes Peter to a regular hospital.

Don't You Let Me Go Tonight by edgeofthegalaxy

In which Tony finds himself taking care of a very sick Peter Parker and things are quickly going downhill.

Peter Parker and Peppermint Don't Mix by spidermanstan

“The reaction seems to be in response to peppermint, boss.” Friday supplied. “Peppermint is known to repel spiders, and can be lethal in large quantities.”  Or In which Peter gives Tony and the gang a rather festive health scare on Christmas Eve

Cyanide? In My Shawarma? by losingmymindtonight

Pepper convinces Tony to bring Peter along on his first dinner with the Rogue Avengers since their pardoning. Poor Tony had thought the whole thing was a recipe for disaster before someone decided to shove some cyanide in his food.

Bohemian Rhapsody by Aurealis, orphan_account

It happened on the route to Avengers Compound for training. Now, Tony Stark lives in the fear of losing the one he would die protecting.

five and one by cinnamontoastcronch

Six times Peter Parker finds himself in a hospital.

A Twisted Upheaval by silentsaebyeok

“I’m afraid, Harrison, you’ve awakened a sleeping giant.” Wilson said. “Tony Stark will do anything and everything to protect those he loves. And with your carelessness, it is inevitable that my criminal empire will be brought to its knees. This is your last opportunity, your last chance to get this right. He is on our radar now.” -- The Kingpin runs the criminal underworld. He is the mastermind and the puppeteer. Tony Stark has been trying to find the elusive gangster for years, but with no luck. But then Peter Parker is kidnapped by an agent of the Kingpin’s, revealing the cracks in an otherwise unshakeable organization. Unlikely alliances form and friendships are made as the criminal underworld begins to unravel.

You always get back up (and I'll catch you when you fall) by SuperHeroTiger

Chapter 1: Day 1: Hanging

Peter Parker always gets back up. But sometimes, he falls, and it hurts, and he breaks. Thankfully Tony Stark is always there to help pull him back to his feet...

[halaboyz]

to each's, csb

pairing: non-idol! choi soobin x gn! reader genre: angst wc: 614 warnings: pool notes: inspired by a scene in crazy little thing called love (iykyk)

"Oh hey, y/n... You asked for me?" Of course he'd be confused. You just had 3 full conversations with him, all academic-related this whole school year.

You smile, turning to hide the flower you've been hiding. "It's graduation day! I want to congratulate you for surviving high school." You giggle, and Soobin does the same, congratulating you back. "I called you here alone because I needed to tell you something."

"That is?" Soobin cranes his neck, cheeks turning red at the sudden seriousness of your voice.

"From elementary, silly puppy crushes- to puberty, wanting to be prettier, more elegant, and more presentable in front of... you." You meet his eyes, shy as you try to make your smile smaller. "I've done this and that just for you to notice me, Soobin. Maybe it wasn't really enough, but it was okay." Soobin doesn't reply, even make a noise, which prompts you to chuckle. "What I'm trying to say is, Choi Soobin... I like you. Ever since we were first graders, to high school, to now." You finally hand him the flower you've been tightly holding on to, smiling.

Soobin was dumbfounded and red. He doesn't know how to react, nor what to say. He's been fiddling with his fingers, heaving a sigh of relief. Just as he was about to take the flower from your hands, your classmate, Beomgyu, barges inside the gates to the pool area. "Hey Soobin! Your girlfriend's been finding you every... where... Oops..." His voice trailed off when he saw the scene, and you're the one who's speechless now. Beomgyu quietly leaves with a guilty mouth, smacking his head in the process.

"You... had a girlfriend?" You're the one who's speechless now.

"Look, y/n..." Soobin has no idea what to say. His shyness was taking over him at the wrong time, seeing your eyes get watery. He has a lot to say, and a whole damn lot of smacks reserved just for Beomgyu, but nothing escapes out of his lips.

"Oh, no! It's okay, Soobin!" You sniff, plastering a wide smile on your face. "It's fine, oh my god, I'm so sorry." You quickly wipe your tears away and retract your arm, messily throwing the flower with no care inside your bag as you got your things.

"Y/n, no..." He tries to reach for your arm but you softly decline, turning to see him.

"It's fine, Soobin. Just a stupid crush anyway," You start walking backwards, smile not fading one second and tears continuously flowing anyway.

Just another fucking step and you step into liquid, feeling yourself drown for a second before straightening your knees and regathering your senses.

What a fucking embarrassment.

"Y/n, oh my god, are you okay?" While you were wiping your face along with your tears, you see a glance of Soobin attempting to jump into the pool to check on you. You extend your arm to stop him, waving your hands in front of your face to hide from him.

All those pampering throughout the years for this?

"I'm okay, Soobin." You give him a chuckle, to convince him and probably yourself too, that you were fine. You are going to be. You will be, right?

As you made your way out of the area, Soobin stops himself from going after you even though he was very worried about you. He figures how you must've felt, not getting a single word from him and getting in that situation.

He was fuming towards his friend. But more importantly, he regrets.

He regrets not saying a thing despite feeling the same way towards you. Now, he might have just lost his last chance.

[fuck-customers]

Not exactly a fuck customers but more like ‘what the fuck, why are people like this’.

I work at a small library in my little town. Small as in, there are only five people who work here total. So you can probably guess, our building is much smaller than most libraries. We do have an auditorium though, one that takes up like 30% of the building. It can be rented and is used for library programs, but when it’s not being used, the lights are turned off and the two entrances have signs that say that ‘for library use only’ or some such thing, meaning, if there’s nobody in there and the doors are closed, lights are off, it’s off limits to patrons. Makes sense, right?

So the other day, I go in for my afternoon shift as usual. It’s after the holiday so there are a lot of returns. My supervisor goes to grab an extra cart so we can divide up the returns, otherwise I’d never get it done all by myself by we closed. She has to go into the auditorium to get the extra cart, which is locked from the side with the actual library but the other door, which is right by our side exist, must have been open. Anyway, she goes in and while I’m digging through books waiting for her, I hear some sort of conversation/noise but don’t think much of it. About this time I notice a patron come and set up with his laptop at one of work tables and put on his headphones. Our other coworker is on his dinner break and again, I don’t think much of any of this.

Anyway, it gets to be around an hour/half an hour ish before we start closing duties and it’s been slow except for a few people coming and going. During this time we sometimes bullshit while we wait for the clock to run down.

My supervisor notes that the man that was sitting at the work table has finally left and then glances at the security monitor, noting the car that was parked next to mine in the employee parking area of our back lot is now gone.

Come to find out, not only was said guy here right at opening, parked halfway into the employee parking area when that’s a total of like three spots (he’s also not someone she recognized when she’s been there 5+ years), apparently this guy was just chilling in the dark fucking auditorium all day? On his laptop, working away? When we’d been open since 10:30 am and he left at like 7pm? Thats what all the noise I had heard earlier was about. She opened the door to the auditorium to get the extra cart we needed, and just causally found this fucker sitting there, doing his thing? She literally had to say to tell him he was welcome to work online just not in here cause that’s not an area open to the public? I think he apologized but still??? He wouldn’t have even been able to access the wifi without the password. But he was just sitting in there the whole goddamn day. Without anyone knowing. And then it gets dark and he doesn’t even have any of the lights on. There’s signs on both doors about this at eye level? Hun, we couldn’t locked you in and never even known it. The side door is locked 15 mins before close and the other doors can’t be opened from the inside.

I love this job, but some of these people I wanna put under a microscope and study for science.

Posted by admin Rodney.

[sublimecatgalaxy]

me again :) i’ve been thinking a lot about javier peña and how i want him to be mine so bad thanks to tiktok💘 the idea i mentioned to you was reader and javi in a long distance relationship and just the phone conversation between the two of them. it could be fluffy or lean on the side of phone sex but literally anything where he’s speaking to the reader is perfect! can you tell i’m really into pedro’s voice? lol🤭

UHHHHH BESTTIE!!!! My first Javi request😌 TUMBLR THERE IS NO SMUT IN THIS, IT'S JUST FLIRTING AND FLUFFY PLEASE DON'T PUT A WARNING ON THIS.

"I did my nails today." I sigh, looking at the red tinge on my fingers and toes with a fond smile, knowing how much Javi loves when I get myself all pretty for him.

"Yeah?" Javier asks softly, his voice sending shivers down my spine, especially after not hearing from him for nearly three days. "What color?" He asks but I can hear the smile in his tone, knowing he already knows what color I chose.

"Your favorite." I hum with a smirk, twirling the cord on the phone while I curl up on his side of the bed, heart aching at the fact that I can no longer smell his cologne on his pillow.

"Red?"

"Yes."

"You should send me some polaroids." He offers with a sense of mischief in his voice and I giggle, eyes rolling at his pervy thoughts.

"Should I?" He laughs through the line and my whole body warms at the noise, a sense of adoration and appreciation consuming me as I desperately wish to be right there beside him in his Colombian home.

"I miss you." He whispers, a tinge of sadness to his voice.

"I miss you too. It's been awfully boring here. Just the cat and me." I reach down to pet my calico beauty Riley in my lap and she purrs happily, nudging her face against my hand just like she does to Javi when he's home. "I need my man here to spice up my life in more ways than one."

"I'm working on it, sweetheart." Though my words were meant to be teasing, there's an honest frustration to his own words and I realize how tired he must be and how much he must want to be home with me. "What else did you do today other than paint your nails and miss me?"

"Bought some groceries, bought a ticket to Columbia, got a new litterbox-"

"Wait what?" He cuts me off and I can hear the line rustle on his end, almost as if he's moving to catch up with the huge bomb I just dropped on him. Playing dumb, I roll my eyes teasingly and give him the best show I can give.

"What?" I ask dumbly, hearing him scoff loudly and impatiently on the other end of the line.

"You're coming to Columbia?" He asks breathlessly and I can picture the tears lining his lash line and the way his cheeks blush gently when he's excited.

"I get on a plane bright and early tomorrow morning." I giggle, boucing excitedly up and down on the bed, spooking Riley out of her slumber as she rushes off the bed and under it.

"You're kidding."

"You sound disappointed?" Nerves swirl in my tummy for a moment until he mutters a quiet 'no, no, no' under his breath and I feel the anxiety of my secret disappear.

"I'm shocked." He scoffs and if I close my eyes hard enough, I can picture him fisting his hair, looking around the room thinking something along the lines of 'how am I going to clean this apartment in time'. "I'm so fucking happy." He hums and the tears lining my own eyes are now dripping down my cheeks, my heart pounding excitedly. "I can't believe you're real."

"I'll show you how real I am in exactly twelve hours from now." He laughs at my flirting and gives me a quiet 'yes dear' and I begin to feel the anticipatory excitement just knowing I'll see him and be in his arms this time tomorrow.

"Promises, promises."

-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o- Taglist: @bubblebuttwade @rafelover2405 @leslienjazzy @sorceresss @grxnde-dwt @alex–awesome–22 @bunnietoof @niyamar1e @serialghost @plantlungs @geniusohn @akaliltimmytim @lilaalouuxx @xshariex @elliotsbeigeguitar @elle4404 @lelieja @srhxpci @joselyn001 @taysirene @spinkspanther @thedivineuphoria @peter-maximoffs @tsukishimawhore @poohkie90 @szlaco @distantsighs @nstyles4299 @wolflover384 @givemefoodandlovesstuff @vane28282 @yeswhatever33 @amirrahfranson @vvaalleennttiinna @f-mu @yaspillz @jeyramarie @skylievin@abbybarnes17 @jointherebellion215 @visiondaddy @steezysimfinds @its-ya-gay-boi-luigi @crunchytoenailsyum@glizzymcguirex @beth123lg @melovesmut @rafecameronswhore @ariianelle @write-from-the heart @vampviolets@haylee-e @honee-chai-tea @lokiandbuckywife

@officiallyunofficialperson@heyaitsklaudia@rosepetalsparks @bluetreecloud20 @scenesofobx @double-shot-of-tequila @1dluver13xx @colbysbrocks @iamasimpingh0e @loveshineslikethesky @id-3-kbro @diorsitgirl @errorfound101-allideasburnedout @neverwillknowme18 @ellyskey @taylors-folk @loversjoy @myaloveee @thyris-is @lagataprrr @aaaaslaaaan @witxhy-lexx @minjix @luvroseee @tee-swizzle @savageneversaw @admiringlove @hysteriahall @piceous21 @starlightandfairies @igotmajordaddyissues @drewstarkey-wife1 @manyfandomsfanvergent @revesephemeres @rafesbae01

[le-trash-prince]

so I have been Thinking a lot about food as love and our thought about Kenta getting really into baking and then I was like. there should be a story where Kenta learns love through food. a series of meals with different people.

it starts with Pete. (everything started with Pete, for Kenta) Kenta's still like, half-here half-not after killing his father, and Pete's a walking open wound with the loss of Way (the loss of what could have been) and they sit mostly in silence in Pete's open plan kitchen while Pete puts together the ingredients that were left already prepped for him. a simple stir fry, a little soup to start. it's warm and filling; it fills in a little bit of what Kenta didn't realise was hunger. it's easy to be with Pete in quiet.

then it's Alan's place, a family dinner where the empty seats are conspicuous and everyone talks a little too loud and vibrant to cover it up. it's a lot to deal with. Kenta hasn't had anything like this and it's just, it's a /lot/ of noise and people brushing against him as they serve each other. he's seated next to Jeff, who keeps his body to himself, and North, who doesn't think to do that at all. half the table carries the whole conversation but nobody seems to mind that Kenta can't contribute. he escapes to the back verandah while the main course is cleared and Sonic and Alan good-naturedly bicker over who might want which dessert. he lights a cigarette and smoke it but mostly just holds it, letting the smell of the smoke settle over him, far more familiar than the mess of scents of everyone inside.

"smoking kills, you know." Kim comes out so quiet he's right next to Kenta before he realises. Kenta stays still (prey animal in front of a predator) while Kim's neat hand reaches up and plucks the cigarette from his mouth. he stubs it out in the ashtray that's clearly well-used.

"I think that will take longer than I have," Kenta answers honestly.

[SKIPPING THE SAD PART FOR NOW]

Kenta genuinely does not remember agreeing to the weekly lunches with Babe (and Charlie when he's not working) yet he turns up for them dutifully regardless. Babe's not much of a cook, and Kenta can't bring himself to learn in such a strange (a stranger's) kitchen, so they mostly order in. they started out eating in front of the tv, using it as a conversation piece, but gradually they stop taking their plates from the bench to the couch, and instead they sit and. actually talk.

for a while they skirt around the topic of Tony, and Way, and Kenta's guilt over not getting out sooner, and Babe's guilt over letting him stay. they talk about the garage and racing (Kenta can drive but he's never going to understand cars the way Babe does) and the miraculous return of Babe's actual father, and the options their lives now hold. it takes quite a few shared lunches before Kenta feels bold enough to lightly tease Babe about Charlie, and Babe blushes a little but mostly he glows. then he fires back, "and what about Kim, huh?"

Kenta chokes on his spoonful of rice. "I don't---what do you mean? What about...him."

Babe waves his fork like he's commanding troops. "I can see you two at the garage! I'm not blind, you know. And Sonic told me about your /dinner dates/."

Kenat stuffs some more food into his mouth in the fruitless hope Babe will get distracted before he has to answer. No such luck. "They're not...dates. He's just, um. Showing me good places to eat."

"Right," Babe drawls, looking far too smug. "Because you need a foreign guy to show you around the city you've always lived in."

Are they dates? Kenta thinks surely Kim would have said something, if they were. Like yes Kenta makes sure he's dressed nicely (his best black pants and shirt, his shows polished) and Kim always generously offers to drive them there ("no sense in both of us trying to find parking)", and Kim always pays ("well, I'm the only one here with an actual job. it's fine! I didn't mean---you don't need to do anything you're not ready for.") and sometimes they sit opposite each other at a small table and their knees brush under it and Kim looks very very pretty in the soft lighting even if Kenta's not brave enough to tell him that. yet.

(okay I hope that helps as a distraction I have to disappear to the grocery store lol)

INCOHERENT NOISES i'm cuddling this ask

yes???? this is beautiful

EVERYTHING STARTED WITH PETE, FOR KENTA!!! I'M CRYING

prey animal in front of a predator fdgkdfg i LOVE. also yes i see you fulfilling the need you (and i) have had for months for kim to put out kenta's cigarrette.

THE SAD PART… GOD….. MY HEART. hits close to home in a personal way

"kenta genuinely does not remember agreeing to the weekly lunches" my mom does this jedi mind trick shit all the time "don't you remember you said you'd do xyz?" LMFAO.

kenta viewing babe as a stranger ouch oh my god………. it's true but it hurts

kenta teasing babe about his boyfriend 😭 slowly learning healthy sibling behavior 🥺

KENTAKIM DINNER DATES!!!!! KENTA GETTING FLUSTERED WHEN BABE MENTIONS KIM!!!! KIM TELLING SONIC ABOUT HIS DINNER DATES WITH KENTA!!!!!!!!!!!! I'M GUSHING gosh they're so smitten with each other… Kim taking things slow because he doesn't want to push Kenta, so he just…. doesn't refer to them as dates AND THEN KENTA DOESN'T KNOW IF THEY'RE DATES OR NOT. just gals being pals, what's better than this

god I love food as an expression of love so much….. Kenta being fed by people, included in meals, even if it's nothing grand, it's more than he's ever had.

North puts food on Kenta's plate without even thinking about it, and Kenta just stares at it at first, wondering if it was an accident and North had meant to give it to someone else, but Sonic just fusses at his to eat already.

When Kim puts food on Kenta's plate, he's definitely thinking about it, and Kenta can tell he's thinking about it, and it's loaded and intimate in a way that Kenta didn't realize food could be, there's a weight to it when he puts the tender morsel in his mouth, deeply conscious of Kim's eyes on him.

Kenta didn't grow up with the luxury of having a favorite food. Under threat of punishment, he learned to eat whatever he was given. As he got older and earned more freedom, he was able to eat out on his own, and he found dishes that he gravitated towards, but it just never occurred to him that he could ask a restaurant to make something a particular way. That he could ask for extra garlic, or fewer chilies, or to sub the chicken for pork. If there's something he doesn't like about the way a dish is made, he just orders a different thing the next time. He does in fact have a lot of preferences and has had very little joy when it comes to food. It's utilitarian to him, and as long as he doesn't have to put much thought into it, that's all that matters.

Kim tries to ask Kenta what he likes and doesn't like, and it's always like pulling teeth because Kenta doesn't think it's important, he can eat whatever Kim wants to make.

But I think Jeff would get it, that Kenta doesn't actually know much about what his own preferences are because he wasn't allowed to have them. He sees Kenta slowly picking at his food sometimes but still forcing himself to eat everything. So he just quietly and regularly reinforces that Kenta is allowed to ask for things to be made a particular way. That it's not a trap when someone asks him what he likes. That he can try things different ways until he figures out the nuances of what he really enjoys.

I hope this makes sense dfgdfgdgf anyways THANK YOU SO MUCH this was indeed a big help, you know dissecting Kenta is my favorite pasttime. I hope you defeated the grocery store!!!

[mikuni14]

Only Boo! - Ep 1-2

A visual representation of me watching Only Boo!

Wow, what a fun series, exactly what I needed right now! 👌

the boys are lovely, sweet, likeable, funny, the actors are nice

the series is genuinely and sincerely funny, the jokes and comedic situations actually made me laugh 😁

I love how Kang is strong, caring, hard-working, competent and reliable. He's also kind and has a dry sense of humor 👌 And his infatuation is clear and visible and he doesn't really fight it - what's not to like!

I love Moo for everything, starting with his name 🐄 and M! jacket. I love how he's unfazed and has that funny smile of his when he's in a pinch. His mother yells at him for his bad grades and sends him to the countryside? The school principal has a "serious" conversation with him? He has to climb to the 5th floor with his luggage and run to the store 3 times (remember! 20 minutes each way!)? School bullies? Moo never reacts with anger or depression, he just vibes with whatever is going on. He is my hero, my zen master I'm also in love with how cute he is and how immediately he glue himself to Kang

I really like the fact that when both of them behave badly, they think about it, they know that the other person did something bad, but they immediately start to analyze what they did wrong in this situation and both of them simultaneously feel remorse and feel the need to apologize IMMEDIATELY, even in the middle of the night 😃 I REALLY like that they both considered the situation, didn't make excuses for themselves, didn't make the situation about themselves and didn't wait to apologize. Ngl, I didn't expect this from a comedy show with a lot of funny cow noises 😆

it has scenes like this:

Wow, I like a whole two series currently airing. Are... are the good times coming back in BL universe? 🥺

[findingmelissa]

I was having a conversation with a good friend this week in which she was telling me that she is highly sensitive to noise and stimulation in the mornings. And it got us talking in general about being sensitive...

So, I had this memory of being about 14 and being at a group sleepover and acting sooooo cranky the next morning. Like, I was downright snippy to my friend's parents, not to mention all the other girls there.

I have quite a few memories like that from when I was young. Being mean and irritable and impatient with my peers or teachers or other parents. And all my life I've always just thought well, I'm an asshole, I am terrible, I am mean. Not a productive way to think about myself.

But in reflecting on this with my friend, a couple of things occurred to me: 1) my parents taught me no emotional regulation and I have to realize that was a big contributing factor in my behavior; and 2) I think I may be somewhere on the spectrum, undiagnosed, I have thought this for a couple of years now, and the more I look back on things like that, the more it would make a whole damn lot of sense.

And this is just one example. But honestly, it would make a lot of things make sense. The way that the world assaults my brain sometimes, when something doesn't "hit my brain right" and I feel like someone is scraping out the inside of my head, or the offending noise or words go on repeat in my mind like a needle in a record groove that I can't get unstuck. It's awful.

So maybe I wasn't a jerk. Maybe I am not a jerk now. :| Wouldn't that be something? If I could stop thinking I am a fundamentally mean and irritable and horrible person and instead accept that I am just frequently overstimulated and have never been taught the tools to cope?

[pocket-lad]

Slight Jurassic park 1 idea:

While Ian has his injured leg in the control room, he starts asking Robert Muldoon about his comment to Adelaide about her being a “tiny.” (Obviously before Muldoon dies.)

Maybe Ian is asking to take his mind off his worries about Adelaide, or he’s trying to figure out what Muldoon knows incase he’s a threat to her (and other borrower’s) safety? Maybe he knows where other borrowers are?

I’m mostly suggesting this because I’m really curious as to who/what interactions Robert Muldoon has had with “tinies” in the past.

I wanted to do so much more with Muldoon when I was originally writing the first story, but I couldn't really fit him in anywhere, so thanks for the prompt!

~

Ian had been in and out of consciousness for an indeterminate amount of time now. ‘Awake’ and ‘asleep’ were becoming harder to differentiate, and he longed for his next shot of morphine. He could feel the steady pounding of blood in his leg.

Robert Muldoon spoke somewhere off in the distance, which was what pulled Ian out of a bout of deep sleep. The words were garbled and unclear.

A thought came to Ian, so before he either forgot or fell asleep again, he interrupted the man’s probably important conversation. Besides, each time Ian fell asleep, he feared he might not wake back up. This should keep him occupied for a moment. His head lifted a little.

“You called her a ‘tiny’. Why?” He exhaled a faint laugh at the ridiculousness of the name. Adelaide almost definitely hated it.

“What was that?” Muldoon asked, unsure if he heard Ian correctly. Ian’s voice was quiet and weak, and Muldoon had expressed his opinion that the man might not pull through without proper medical care. There were just too many bigger fish to fry presently.

“You’ve seen her before.” That wasn’t exactly what Ian meant, but the pain and the drugs seemed to prevent him from forming complex sentences. 

So, Muldoon did hear him correctly. He approached the spot where Malcolm laid on the floor and sat in a chair. “Yeah, I’ve seen her kind around.”

“Where?”

“Here and there. A bit of everywhere.”

Ian’s main concern was whether he needed to be worried. Past that, he was deeply curious about the existence of such small people across the world. Adelaide either didn’t know or didn’t want to share, and he respected that. But if someone else was willing to indulge him…

“Tell me,” Ian prompted.

Muldoon was also quite curious about borrowers. He knew enough - it was hard not to when he’d been all over the world - but he’d never seen one traveling with a regular person before. He’d never seen one trust a regular person before. At least, not to this extent.

“Why don’t you tell me?”

Ian sighed and laid back down. “No.”

Muldoon chuckled. Malcolm seemed very protective of the girl, so he guessed he wouldn’t get much out of him. He supposed sharing his story wouldn’t hurt, though. Plus, it would distract him from the whole lot of nothing he could do right now.

***

Muldoon knew the area well. Growing up in a remote part of Kenya, these animals were just another part of his everyday life. This also meant he was very good at hunting. So good, in fact, that other hunters hired him to track the animals for them. It wasn’t his favorite thing to do, but it was a living.

The air sat at a pleasant 75 degrees, but he watched the sweat drip down the men’s backs as they hunted down a cape buffalo. For no particular reason, Muldoon found himself disinterested and detached today. Until he heard a scream.

He shot to attention. The noise was faint, but definitely there, and very human. It obviously wasn’t one of the men who accompanied him.

Turning in the direction he thought the sound came from, his eyes landed on some grass. Muldoon slowly stalked toward it, his senses zeroed in. He crouched down and gently pushed the tall grass out of the way. In a small clearing no bigger than his hand laid a dead shrew and a small person. A very small person.

It seemed to be a young male, and he was well under three inches tall. He was sprawled out, panting hard, eyes trained on the shrew…The boy had killed the shrew! His clothes were tattered and he looked to be bleeding.

“Bloody hell…” Muldoon muttered.

His voice drew the boy’s attention. With wide eyes, he shot to his feet and abandoned his kill, sprinting for cover.

Muldoon didn’t bother chasing after him, too stunned to even think about it. That creature was human, there was no doubt about that. The way it moved, the way it looked at him. He could see him thinking, analyzing.

A deep bellow that signified the death of a cape buffalo pulled him out of his thoughts. He took one last look at the clearing and the dead shrew, shook his head, then returned to his group.

***

“You call them tinies,” Ian said.

“Yes.”

“Did you make that up?”

“No.”

“Interesting.”

“They’re tiny.”

“Yes, I’m, uh...aware.”

There was a long silence.

“Not very creative though, is it?” Ian mused. “Not very scientific. Degrading...perhaps.”

“I’ll let someone know. Make sure to get them properly named.”

Ian exhaled a laugh.

***

The next day, Muldoon found himself back at the same clearing, this time alone and much more prepared. It was unlikely such a small person even left tracks in the dirt, but if he did, they were long gone by now. So, Muldoon started in the direction the boy went.

He spent the better part of the day walking in circles. He kept his eyes trained mostly on the ground but occasionally glanced up at the trees. There was no reason this creature couldn’t climb. Hell, if it survived out here, it could probably do a number of impressive things.

His steps were slow and light, but he imagined at that size, the boy would hear him coming a mile away. He also imagined that there were more of them, and they probably worked together to survive, especially if they were capable of critical thought.

Muldoon was deep in the middle of nowhere when he heard a voice, so quiet he could chalk it up to imagination, but he knew better. He crouched down, hiding in the grass, watching the plains before him.

After fifteen minutes of holding the uncomfortable position, Muldoon almost fell over when he saw a small person tentatively peek out of an ordinary snake hole in the ground. They looked around cautiously for predators, holding some kind of weapon high in their hand, then ushered a couple more people out of the hole.

Muldoon couldn’t believe his eyes. There must have been a whole colony of them underground. But there wasn’t much he could do. Any movement would likely scare them off. And so he watched.

In fact, he watched them take down a silvery mole-rat. The thing put up quite a fight, and its giant buck teeth looked intimidating next to the small people, but working together, it was a laughably easy kill from what he could tell. 

Fascinated, Muldoon rocked back on his heels. The crunch of the foliage underneath his feet echoed across the plain and the world went deadly silent.

As expected, all their little eyes shot up in his direction, locking onto his own eyes. (At least, he assumed they did. He could see their heads turn, but their actual eyes were too small and too far off.) And just like the day before, they abandoned their kill and made a break for the hole in the ground.

Muldoon cursed and stood up, stretching his sore limbs and walking over to where they disappeared, bypassing the mole-rat. There was no sense in being quiet now. They knew he was there.

Unable to keep his curiosity at bay, he laid himself flat on his stomach and peered into the hole. Immediately, a sharp pain radiated underneath his eye. He felt around and yanked out a small sliver of wood. It was a spear! A tiny, shoddy, makeshift spear, but a spear nonetheless. And if it hit any closer, it potentially could’ve ruined his left eye for good. Muldoon couldn’t help but laugh in amazement.

He set the spear on the ground close by and whipped out a small flashlight attached to his belt. He clicked it on, illuminating the narrow tunnel. Just at the edge of the light stood a whole group of people, varying in age but huddled around each other and each brandishing their own weapon. They flinched back from the bright light and shielded their eyes.

“Bloody hell…”

At the sound of his voice, another spear was sent flying his way and it stuck him in the hand. They did not want him here, that much was clear.

Muldoon took the hint. He distractedly removed the second spear and set it by the first, then got to his feet and dusted himself off.

The decaying silvery mole-rat sat there, already coated in flies. At the last second, he picked it up and placed it near the entrance, too. He suspected these tiny beings wouldn’t emerge from their home so soon after he left - it must have looked like he would use the mole-rat as bait and stick around to spy on them. But Muldoon didn’t do that. Instead, he left, lost in thought but still well-aware of his surroundings.

What was he to do with all this information?

Nothing, he decided. Absolutely nothing. Maybe he’d visit again someday. Or not.

***

Time passed, and Muldoon saw dozens of tinies over the years. From the plains to the city, indoors and outdoors, across countries, they seemed to be pretty much everywhere. Like roaches, almost. Except they took very little, left behind no waste, and took care of pests. You just had to know where to look and what to look for. Muldoon knew where to look and what to look for.

***

Ian listened as patiently as he could. He wasn’t sure he believed Muldoon, but there wasn’t any particular reason to doubt him outside his own cynicism.

The confirmation that borrowers existed across the world and that some even lived outside though - that was fascinating. He’d have to tell Adelaide when she came back. If she came back. Hm.

“My question is, how’d you get one of them to trust you?” Muldoon asked. When he received no reply, he glanced at Malcolm, who had long since passed out. His skin was sweaty and pale and he looked worse by the minute. If Muldoon believed in hope, he’d hope for the man to pull through. If not for himself, then at least for that poor girl.

And then maybe, just maybe he’d sit down and talk to her. Or not. He’d keep on living just the same.