#who wants to START doing things at 9:15pm

[l8tof1]

.

[gavisuntiedboot]

Blue raspberry (Gavi x Reader)

28 day writing prompt challenge - prompts are here

Day 11: Late night McDonald's run

Warning: mentions/ alluding to eating disorders! Mentions of being scared to eat certain foods! If you're not comfortable please don't read!

"Pablo, I'm here, but they won't let me come into the parking lot because they don't recognize my car, so you're going to need to come up to."

"I'm walking up to you right now. Pull over to the side."

You moved your car from in front of the barrier to wait as close as possible on the side of the road. Despite the fact that it was 9:15pm, there were still about a dozen fans waiting to see the players emerge, hoping to get photos and autographs. You saw Gavi's hooded figure emerge, and he looked for your car. You flashed your lights to notify him where you were, but you notified the fans as well. They ran over and swarmed him, making it almost impossible to get to you. He took a few pictures and signed a few shirts before security intervened, separating him from his loyal supporters.

He got into your car and threw his backpack over his shoulder into the back seat, sighing and sinking into the seat. There was a path for you drive between the fans, and so you left Camp Nou and the flashes of iPhones behind you.

"Great. Now my Ford is going to be all over Twitter. People will want to get pictures with Gavi's chauffer. I'll never have a moment of peace."

He let out a tired laugh and pulled his hood down, finally relaxing as you hit the road.

"First of all, you already stick out for driving this obnoxiously American car in the middle of Spain. And second, why didn't you just tell security you were here to pick me up?"

"Gavi, can you imagine if security just let random girls in if they said they were there to see you? You would have been kidnapped a long time ago."

You rarely ever picked up Gavi. Your relationship was still relatively new, and he didn't want you to be hounded by the press and by people on social media making unfounded and nasty comments. Plus, he usually had a ride. He often arrived and left with Pedri, who was all too happy to have some company on his way to work in the mornings. If not Pedri, then another member of the squad (or even a member of staff) was always happy to make sure he got to and from practice safely (and didn't get snatched by a random fan).

But today, he was just in the worst mindset. It was freezing in Barcelona, and he hated to practice in the cold. As usual, he was slipping and sliding around the field, even more than usual due to the rain of the previous night. He was cold and wet, and he was being constantly critiqued by the coaching staff because he was just not in top form today. To make matters worse, he was starving. He had been following Robert's "healthy diet" advice, but sometimes he got so fixated on not eating the wrong thing that he just forgot to eat altogether. He had finished some weight training and was ready to hit the shower and go home when he got the news from Pedri.

"The Adidas reps are coming over to get me fitted for some new boots. I wont be leaving until 10:30."

Gavi almost cried at the news that he was going to be held at the Camp so late. He was exhausted. He was cold. He wanted to see his girlfriend. And so he swallowed his pride and called you, asking you to rev up the gas-guzzler and pick him up, even if it meant being photographed together.

"Mi corazón, are you okay? You're giving off more distressed vibes than usual."

"Honestly, I don't know," he replied, turning to look at you. "I've just been feeling drained and down. Everything is irritating me and I just want to sit in bed and do nothing."

A moment of silence passed. You didn't know what to say. You understood how Pablo felt: it was hard living up to so much pressure and expectations, and even if it wasn't full-blown depression, it was enough to make you worried. You didn't want these feelings to start interfering with his day-to-day, because you knew that would just make him feel worse. You weren't a therapist, but you wanted to do whatever you could to provide him with a little bit of comfort.

"... do you want to go to McDonald's?"

"What?" He said, looking over at you with his eyebrows stitched together in confusion, like you had asked the question in a different language.

"Well I mean when I've had a shit day I usually find myself in the McDonald's drive-thru. Nothing makes me feel as good as a 9-piece nugget meal and an Oreo McFlurry. But if you just want to go home I can just take you home."

"I... don't even remember the last time I went to McDonald's."

"Are you being serious?"

"Yeah. I eat a lot at the club and have my macros tracked by the nutritionists there. And then usually I'm with the boys and Eric or someone else cooks. And I don't have a car, so it prevents me from coming here for a McChicken whenever I want."

You drove for a few more minutes before turning into the drive through.

"Welcome to McDonald's what can I get for you?"

You placed your order, going a little overboard and getting everything that looked somewhat appealing. You turned to Gavi.

"What do you want?"

"All that food was for you?!"

"Quickly."

"Um... maybe I just get a small fries. I don't want to ruin all the work I've done by pigging out."

You looked at Gavi with wide eyes. It was dawning on you how much he was actually worried about his eating habits for fear of being ridiculed by the club.

"For him can I get a large McChicken meal with a blue raspberry slushie and- M&Ms or Oreo?"

"What?"

"Hurry up Pablo or we'll be here all night. M&Ms or Oreo?"

"But I- fine. Oreo."

"And an Oreo McFlurry. That's all"

You left the speaker, waiting in line to pay, and you looked over at Pablo, whos cheeks were bright red. He was looking directly in front of him, avoiding eye contact with you.

"What's wrong Pablito? You just said you liked McChickens."

"I do amor, that's not the problem." He said, looking at you. You took his hand in yours and laced your fingers together.

"It's just been a long time since I let myself eat this kind of stuff. And I mean I know that one time will be fine but I just... I don't know how to not feel guilty for having fried food for the first time in like a year."

You brought his hand up to your lips and kissed it gently, rubbing the back of it with your thumb.

"Pablo, you guys just won the Spanish Supercup less than a month ago - and you were in top form might I add. I know it's hard to let yourself have simple pleasures, but you deserve to have things that make you happy every now and then. And plus, this meal is probably better for you than two beers."

He smiled widely, leaning over to give you a gentle kiss. You reciprocated, enjoying the feeling of his soft lips against yours until the car behind you honked, causing you both to swiftly pull away.

You moved to the window, pulling out your wallet to pay.

"Corazón, you don't have to pay for the food. I can get it."

"Oh my God Pablo Gavi?"

He had forgotten to pull his hood up, and now the man at the window looked ready to faint. Pablo panicked. He did not want to be photographed in this moment.

"Why don't you get something for him to sign for you?" You asked sweetly, and Gavi squeezed your arm, greatful for your quick thinking. The employee ran off to find something for Gavi to sign.

"I think my card fell in my bag. Pablito, can you open up my McDonald's app on my phone so I can get the reward points?"

The employee returned, hands shaking as he handed you a shirt and a Sharpie for Gavi. The app lit up Gavi's face and just before he gave you the phone, his eyes got wide.

"Bebe, why do you have 7,000 McDonald's points."

".... I'm sad often. Hurry up and sign the shirt."

You got your food and drove back to Pablo's house.

"It's your obligation as a passenger to eat fries out of the bag while they are hot, and occasionally feed some to me." You said playfully. He smirked at you, grabbing some fries and taking a bite.

"Fuck."

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing. I just forgot how good fat and salt are."

At Pablo's house, he tried to set the food on the table, but you stopped him, grabbing the bag and skipping over to the couch. You set the food out on the coffee table and dimmed the lights.

"Why do the lights have to be off for us to eat?" Pablo asked, sitting on the couch and putting one arm around you, pulling you close.

"Because it's more freeing. Don't look and hyper-analyze what you're eating, Pablo. Just eat until you're full."

You unwrapped the burger and handed it to Pablo, following quickly with your own food. You put on an episode of your favorite show, and you two just sat and ate and cuddled. After 5 or 6 episodes, the food was cleared, and you and Pablo had situated yourselves on the couch. He was laying in your arms, and you alternated between eating ice cream yourself and feeding him spoonfuls.

"Bebe, I have a question?"

"Yes mi amor?"

"How did you know I was going to like blue raspberry?"

"Because you have the taste buds of a 5 year old, just like me. Why? Did you like it?"

"I loved it. I'm going to go and buy myself one every time I score a goal."

"Can I get in on this deal? I also like slushies."

"Of course mi corazón. How else am I going to get to the McDonald's? You'll be driving."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A/N: Hey y'all! Hope you enjoyed this one. Inspired by my own late night McDonald's run (which actually tragically ended w me spilling half the food on the floor). If you haven't had a blue raspberry slushie from McDonald's (and it's available where you are) go get one. I have met so many athletes who have this mentality around fast food, and so I wanted to give a little bit of a different perspective. Anyways, I've really been enjoying this prompt challenge. I hope you are too. Please leave any comments or feedback here or in my asks, and see y'all later!

[phoenixashvibes]

Mercury in Aries ♈️

TRANSITS (RX is 4/1)

March 9, 2024 at 11:03pm EST Mercury will transit to Aries starting to steadily approach its retrograde on APRIL FOOLS DAY on April 1st. These times will be marked with a transit from out of the creative, dreamy and watery Pisces into quick expression, highly enthusiastic, quick and decisive Aries. We will see people being more alert and assured of what is going on with themselves. It would be an ideal time to put some of those ideas you dreamed up in Pisces season to fiery action in a practical manner. This is a favorable energetic for kicking off literally anything new for you!

As Mercury gets comfortable in Aries it is go time because On Sunday The Moon is NEW MOON in PISCES at 5:00AM EST and then later the Moon will also join Mercury in Aries at 8:19PM EST Not to mention that the sextile with Mercury and Pluto in Aquarius at 6:20pm EST & Moon & Pluto Sextile at 10:38pm EST There are huge improvements in communication coming in with this astrological transit. Aries is the sign where the vibe is "it's all about me" and with Mercury the sign of (thinking/communication) this will initiate a period of time with bright and passionate sparks of creative endeavors taking off with lightning speed whether that be romantic (or platonic) outings, communication can get a bit spicy. There will be no filter on and offline!! Sarcasm will reign. Communication can easily lead to argument or conflict if we aren’t careful since it can be aggressively assertive in nature. People will be way more blunt and say what’s on their mind before it’s fully processed smh on a more positive side difficult conversations will be easier to have and it won’t be hard to speak up or put yourself or ideas out to others :)

People will also be driving fast on these roads. Be safe and buckle up. This is ideal for race car driving for those who are Aries Mercury it's a Need For Speed. Trust me I know. These people drive really fast and recklessly but they usually do not hit people they are normally the ones who get struck in traffic accident wrecks so be safe during these times because now EVERYONE will be on this.

When Aries is in Mercury people really don't have much patience for b/s and things can get violent super quick with speedy Mercury in this Martian territory. This will be a time to think before speaking, driving crazy, and/or doing anything too risky based off impulse. Know when to cut out or remove yourself from any hostile or chaotic situations with haste it would be good for you and all involved under this astrological transit w/ Mercury in Aries

Embody the evolved side of Aries where you are strategic about your next move. Well thought out planning while executing without much delay. Do what you feel most passionate about. Do not let any trivial matters and concerns overwhelm you. Be truthful about everything to yourself and others unapologetically but also as respectfully as you are able to be. Do not let anyone provoke you into any situation where it can undermine your position, success, self worth, etc. Do not be too selfish or a pushover during these times.

MARCH 18th PRE-RETROGRADE shadow begins MARCH 19th is the FIRST DAY OF SPRING it is also the same day the Sun goes into Aries later at 11:06PM EST. Earlier in the day, Mercury will go conjunct with the North Node in Aries spiraling us to adapt to embracing brand new perspectives and plans for elevating our lives for the near and far out future in the new zodiac year.

APRIL 1st Mercury goes RX at 6:15PM EST This will be a good time to start setting more alarms and alerts/ Practice more self exploration and introspection. stay loyal to your friends and spouses. Make efforts to do more positive self talk. Practice patience while communicating. Avoiding heavy traffic areas if at all possible while traveling unless you want to be around those who drive like it’s the Autobahn or NASCAR. Journal and meditate. Clear the headspace since Aries rules the head! Also, don’t be afraid to take the lead. Aries is all about leadership and doing being that it is a Cardinal fire sign. Take action to have your life run the way you want, you’re the main character 🥰

APRIL 11th- Mercury conjunction with the Sun at 5:06PM EST An ideal day for anything that requires a quick response. Social interactions will be at an all time high. Ironically the day is 4/11 which is also a number that stands for information, you know the 411 lol 😂 so there will be a lot of information being exchanged. Chatterbox city on and off line. You won’t be able to avoid communicating with yourself or others about new ideas and plans for what’s to come!

APRIL 25th 8:55AM EST Mercury goes Direct Everything comes to a culmination. Of course the shadow period will be for two more weeks but the hard part is out the way. Now is a time to reflect and directly apply everything you learned through this transit. There will be a lot of work to build a solid foundation for whatever it is you initiated under this Mercury in Aries transit. There may be some making up to do for those that let the fiesty, fiery side come out through arguments and conflict. It will be easier to start hard conversations in order to gain understanding from whatever got misunderstood when things got chaotic. You will have the courage to speak up regarding whatever it is you initiated and focused your attention on. Some will be playing catch up and others will be moving at faster rates. Results and progress can be made quicker now so use this wisely to push ahead 🫶🏽

May 13th Mercury’s Post Retrograde (RX) ends

On May 15th Mercury enters Taurus

HISTORICAL EVENTS DURING ARIES IN MERCURY Sinking of the Titanic - April 16, 1912

Battle(s) of Lexington & Concord- April 19, 1775 (start of American Revolutionary War)

American Pony Express First Run- April 3, 1860

Former US Pres. Donald Trump plead not guilty to NY court on 34 felony counts of falsifying documents related to 2016 "hush money" payments to a woman alleging they had an extramarital affair- April 4, 2023

Former Pres. Barack Obama endorses his former Vice P. Joe Biden for pres.- April 15, 2020

My Predictions for This Year in 2024:

More Coverage/Talks of Multiple Countries at War

Beef between Stans or Musicians

New Laws Being Proposed & Others Being Implemented into Law

Pre-Election Talk

Zodiac Signs Most Effected?

Aries, Gemini, Libra, Taurus

[snowe-zolynn-rogers]

Who Let Us Have A Group Chat?

Pairings: None

Word Count: 1,210

Summary: In which, Lunar needs some more therapy for his anger issues.

Warnings: Cursing, Caps, Self Worth Issues (mentioned only), Anxiety (mentioned), Trust Issues (mentioned only), Self-Esteem Issues (mentioned only), Trauma (mentioned only), Limb Lost (mentioned only), Child Endangerment (mentioned), Bolide please do not commit child endangerment, Death (mentioned only), Panic Attacks, Allergic Reaction, let me know if I should add anything else.

Chapter 4: Lunar, Please Tone It Down

12:15pm Who Took My Hat?

Lunar: Why in the living fuck are all the seven year olds covered in fucking glitter glue, SUN?

Sun: Um

Sun: You see

Sun: During craft time

Lunar: I DON'T CARE ABOUT CRAFT TIME WHY IS THEY COVERED IN GLUTTER GLUE!?

Sun: The kids found my stash of glitter glue

Lunar: Moon, we're never buying glitter or glitter glue again.

Moon: Duly noted.

Kill Code: Now that you're not being yelled at, how was therapy yesterday?

Sun: Oh, it was okay.

Kill Code: Dug into the self-worth issues?

Sun: Dug immediately into the anxiety.

Eclipse: rip Sun.

Sun: Yours was anxiety first too?

Eclipse: Oh no, Dr. Leeson went for the god complex to get that in check first.

Blood Moon: Dr. Pierce said I have trust issues.

Harvest Moon: Ryans going straight for my low self-esteem.

Lunar: Fucking Marin always goes for my trauma.

Moon: Dr. Allis went for my self worth

Kill Code: All of you act like it's the end of the world.

Moon: You try talking about your feelings!

Kill Code: I do. Dr. Halloway and I talk about my anger issues every two weeks.

Heliosphere: rip

Bolide: rip

4:18pm Who Took My Hat?

Lunar: I'm confiscating your hands, you dirty motherfucker.

Moon: LISTEN

Lunar: NO

Kill Code: Why are we losing our hands now? Not that I'm complaining, I'll just stay in here for it.

Lunar: THIS BITCH JUST THREW A KID!

Kill Code: Moon

Moon: KC

Kill Code: Moondrop Celestial

Moon: Crescent Celestial

Kill Code: Oh, given name now. Moon we agreed to not do things such as throw children when I agreed to behave.

Moon: Crescent, we agreed to YOU not getting child endangerment charges, not me.

Kill Code: It was a given, Moon, that we both participate.

Moon: No it wasn't!

Kill Code: Lunar, I've got control of our hands for today. Moon effectively doesn't have hands, your welcome.

Lunar: Thank you, Crescent.

Kill Code: No problem, my child.

Lunar: Nope keep that family title away from me.

Kill Code: Fine. No problem, Lunar.

Lunar: Better.

5:17 pm Who Took My Hat?

Lunar: Okay, nevermind, throw Jonas again.

Kill Code: I strictly do not endanger children and neither does Moon.

Lunar: I hate both of you.

Lunar: Blood Moon, come toss a child!

Blood Moon: At therapy, talk later.

Lunar: Harvest, come throw a child!

Harvest Moon: Little busy with something. Don't wanna weld my hand.

Lunar: ECLIPSE

Eclipse: Listen, Dr. Marin will kill me if I do that.

Lunar: YOU ALL SUCK

Bolide: I'll come throw a kid.

Lunar: Savior.

Bolide: How do I get there.

Lunar: Internal navigation.

Lunar has sent their location

8:27pm Who Took My Hat?

Eclipse: Dad Alert.

Moon: Fine.

Kill Code: What is this about?

Eclipse: Harvest welded his hand and I can't get it off and Blood Moon came home from therapy and started crying. Helio has been trying to help but we can't really defuse either situation and both of the twins just want each other but Ves can't really leave and Bee won't come out of his room.

Kill Code: I'm coming, give me a half hour.

9:05pm Who Took My Hat?

Sun: So...It's Crescent?

Kill Code: It can be either. KC is the first I was given, Crescent is merely the name I adopted autonomously.

Sun: So, it's Crescent.

Kill Code: You could say that.

Sun: Will you agree or disagree?

Kill Code: Neither.

Sun: I hate you so much right now.

Kill Code: Good.

Sun: How did that Dad Alert go?

Kill Code: Oh, me and Moon had to replace Harvest's hand casing, calm him down, calm Blood down, calm Eclipse and Heliosphere down and send them to bed because all of them were exhausted after simultaneous panic attacks. Turns out Dr. Pierce dug at his separation anxiety with Harvest and, when Harvest didn't come to comfort him, he panicked and broke down. Eclipse was panicking over not being able to detach Harvest from the machine and Helio had his first panic attack trying to get to Blood Moon.

Sun: Your kids amaze me sometimes with how uncoordinatedly coordinated their panic attacks are.

Kill Code: You and me both.

11:45pm Who Took My Hat?

Moon: I'm having a crisis.

Kill Code: What kind of crisis are we going through today, Moon?

Moon: Ate three buckets of ice cream crisis.

Kill Code: Please tell me it was nondairy.

Moon: They don't make nondairy bulk tubs.

Kill Code: God, we're going to die.

Moon: But the caramel pecan is good and the chocolate cherry drowns out my pain and almond fudge makes me happier.

Kill Code: GOD HELP US Cherry!? We're fucking allergic!

Moon: But poison tastes so good.

Kill Code: I'll beg, someone hook us to the computer and tell it to shoot us with a two rounds of epinephrine.

Sun: On it.

Blood Moon: Why the hell would you eat cherry when you know you're allergic?

Moon: I was having a crisis, okay!?

Kill Code: At the expense of our body slowly trying to shut down to fix itself.

Sun: You two are heavy, you know that?

Moon: I know this, Sun.

Kill Code: I'd love to see him struggle to lift my body in your head.

Moon: You're lightweight in my head, dumbass. You're body is literally mostly hollow, you just look terrifying to people who haven't seen it before.

Kill Code: I am not lightweight.

Moon: You are a twig!

Kill Code: And you're lanky!

Moon: Yes, but I accept it.

Sun: Okay, you said epinephrine?

Kill Code: Yes. Two shots. Just ask the computer for one for cherries and one for dairy and they'll do the work for you.

Sun: Okay, they said completed.

Kill Code: Now we get the waiting game to see if we wake up tonight or tomorrow morning.

Lunar: I hope in the morning because I don't like you.

Moon: You don't like me?

Lunar: No, the other one.

Moon: Yeah, yeah. Got it.

Lunar: Look, I know you hate yourself but I fucking love you, Moon. Don't you ever doubt that.

Moon: I'm totally not crying.

Kill Code: He's crying and making me cuddle him.

Moon: SHUT UP!

Lunar: Just cry about it, we all know you have issues believing people love you.

Kill Code: He's sobbing, thanks, Lunar.

Lunar: Anytime, Crescent.

Kill Code: Hate you.

Lunar: Convenient, I was gonna say that.

Sun: How about we all just go to bed after such an eventful day?

Blood Moon: Everyone else here is asleep already. I don't sleep at night.

Lunar: Like you're even going to make it to bed, Sun, stop lying to yourself.

Sun: It was mainly targeted at you, Cressy, and Moony.

Kill Code: Oh, more nicknames now, joy. How do you and your brother pick up the same damn nickname without coordinating that?

Sun: Same way we both came up with Luney and Bloody, we do it by instinct by making someone's name sound cutesy like Sunny and Moony. Hell, we referred to Eclipse as Clipsey for like a few months when he wasn't obsessed with the Star.

Eclipse: bg74398fcip490r-28509345%#^%$&*GVHJyuh66%^%*

Kill Code: Thank you for the input, Eclipse.

[myhauntedsalem]

REAL NURSES SHARE TRUE GHOST STORIES

Don’t Let Them Take Me

The best I have heard is from a nurse who said that one night she was floated to oncology at the hospital where she used to work. She was given a patient who was passing away and had been unconscious for several days. At one point during the night the nurse went into the room and the patient was at the top of the bed and looked at her and said, “Don’t let them take me!” The nurse was freaked out and asked the patient who was going to take her and she said that black thing up there and pointed up in the air. This patient died within minutes.

Calling From the Grave

We had a patient who was always on the call button. You know the type. The nurses have to take turns during the shift answering the call button so the primary can actually do other work.

I work 7pm-7am. He died about 8pm. Oh, the look on his face, like, “How could you let me die!” Like it was our fault. Anyway, family came and gone by 9pm, funeral home gone at 9:30pm. About 10pm, the call button starts going off. I was there – call button going off every 5 minutes.

One of the nurses was a very spiritual girl. At about 2am, after like 4 HOURS OF THIS, nurse Mary snaps, “Enough!”

She walks down and practically screams into the empty room: “Mr. X, you have died. You can’t be in here bothering us anymore. Move along. In the name of Jesus, I’m exorcising you from this plane of existence. Go to the light and be happy!”

And I kid you not, the call button stopped going off then and there.

Time to Die

I don’t know if this qualifies as a ghost story but here it is. I was taking care of a 12 year old with aplastic anemia. A week before she died, every day, at 12:15pm, I would get a cold chill across the back of my neck and the hair there would stand up. I mentioned it to the evening nurse, who was convinced she would die at that time. Several days later, her parents decided to cease all treatment. She lapsed into a coma. At 12 noon, she woke; asked me to hold her up; said goodbye to her parents, grandparents, and siblings; and died in my arms. It was 12:15 pm.

Betty’s Back

I work as a CNA in long term care. We had one resident, “Betty,” who was totally independent. All ADL’s were done on her own and she did fine on her own, never had an incident. The only time she wanted help was showers and then she only wanted you around to make sure she didn’t slip and fall. Betty came down with pneumonia and had to be hospitalized. When she came back she was too weak to do things on her own but too stubborn to ask for help. The last thing the CNA told her before going to bed was “If you want to get up, hit your call light. I’ll come help you.” Of course she didn’t, got rid of the bed alarm, climbed out of bed, and fell. Betty died from the fall. Her bed has been empty since.

The following week the call light for the room went off at night. Thinking it was the resident in bed B I walked down the room to see what she wanted. I walked into the room only to see the call light for bed B and A off, the call light for bed C (Betty’s unoccupied bed) was on. My eyes filled up with tears, I backed out of the room, and made someone else turn the call light off.

Don’t Let Me Die

This is really more of a possession than a ghost story. I was helping another nurse with a patient that had lived a very hard life. He had numerous things going on with him, from cardiac to renal failure. This man was very much afraid to die. Every time his heart monitor beeped, he would just go into a rage screaming, “Don’t let me die! Don’t let me die!” The other nurse and I found out why he didn’t want to die.

About 0200 his cardiac monitor starts alarming V-Tach. We both rush into the room. I am pulling the crash cart behind me. When I get to the room, the other nurse is completely white. This man was sitting about 2 inches above the bed and was laughing. His whole look completely changed. His eyes just had a look of pure evil in them and he had this evil smile on his face. He laughed at us and said, “You stupid b****es aren’t going to let me die are you?” and he laughed again. We were kinda frozen. I did reach up and hit the Code Blue button and when I did the man went into V-fib. He crashed back onto the bed. We started coding him, but after 20 minutes it was called.

Five minutes after the code, several of the code team is in the room cleaning up when this man sits straight up in the bed and says, “You let him die. Too bad.” and then begins laughing. The man collapsed back to the bed. We heard a horrible, agonizing scream (actually every patient in the unit that night commented on the scream), and then you could hear “don’t let me die” being whispered throughout the unit. Every one of the nurses that night was pale and scared. Nobody went anywhere by themselves. By morning the whispers of “don’t let me die” were gone. The night shift nurses had a prayer service in the break room before we left for home and then we all had nightmares for weeks.

[hayleylwong]

reflection 05-02-2023 9:15pm

9:15 - today i am annoyed and frustrated. my roommates have been getting bolder and i am still unable to confront them. today i returned to my dorm and found the fairy lights from my box from angie turned off. i thought this was odd bc they dont turn off bc the switch is broken and u have to use a safety pin or something similar. anyways after inspection it appeared that the battery case of the lights had been broken into and a battery taken out so that the lights would turn off. theyre not even that bright and ive seen my roommates literally sleep with their laptops on playing shows out loud all night. anyways the battery thing was extra annoying bc the panel that comes off to change the batteries was missing the little pieces that keep it attached so they literally broke it im very upset. also i only ate like ten caramel things from the bag that was in there and now its a lot less full. i am very upset but i dont know how to confront them. i also think they ate the rest of my trader joe takis idk why they think i wont notice if they just leave a few left. there were like ten left in there when i brought it back and then i opened it again and there were two. who is such a glutton that they go through someones stuff just to take like eight pieces. i have begun to take before and after pictures of all my stuff so i will know if they have gone through it. i think they also ate my granola bc the bag was resealed differently than how i do it. i would never clip it back so ugly. i also think they ate my pretzels and peanut butter cups and i know they ate my chocolate pretzels last week. and they definitely ate my chips too i dont understand why they dont just go buy it themselves theyre literally all international and out of state and have expensive unnecessary products. my tissue box that i only used three tissues from was empty too do they really think if they leave two left that i will gaslight myself into thinking i used a hundred tissues in half a week when i literally wasnt even in the dorm for more than like an hour total. also i started to feel a pimple forming on my nose so i went to get one of my pimple patches and the box that i know there were at least 12 left an entire whole sheet was left and it was just the packaging i am very upset especially because they are twice as expensive at the westwood target. whose disgusting face needs to use that many pimple patches i am very upset. i am going to start using their olaplex and kerastase hair products in the shower and using their expensive face products i do not care anymore. i am very upset. i am going to ask my ra friend for advice and tell him that next time they throw in the dorm he should go yell at them. he should also tell them that youre violating our roommate agreement by having unannounced guests over half the week sleeping in the living room. i want to start leaving my food to spoil on purpose so that when they eat it they get food poisoning or something i am very upset. i dont understand why they feel the need to take my stuff im literally going to keep a log of everything missing and charge them at the end of the quarter. they broke my fridge and the freezer part has no door anymore and is covered in like an inch of ice. and i swear i had another two bags of frozen stuff in there that is now gone so they probably ate that too. literally whenever i open anything they take it upon themselves to eat half of whatevers in there and leave like a tiny bit left wtf. but i am very bad at confrontation but i prob need to try by myself before going to the ra. i am very upset. literally what did i do to them. i am very upset. oh yeah today i got like six hours of sleep and ate grilled cheese and tomato soup from kerckhoff cafe and then got boba from sharetea and then i had ramen from feast for dinner and i got cafe 1919 for dessert. everything was so good. after my laundry which i have time to do for the first time in three weeks ! after i finish i am going on a topgolf date w my friend lol. hes paying ahaha. i hope i still have time to meet my club friends after.

10:53 - we are not going to topgolf anymore bc the waitlist is full. oh well lol i feel like he did this on purpose so that i would have to pay for it next time bc we agreed to alternate paying for dates. we are still going somewhere though i guess.

[lady-olive-oil]

Note: ok! Here it is finally!!! Imma work on the covers for this but for now, here’s the cover for chapter 1🤣if you’d like to be added to the taglist let me know.

Expect The Unexpected Ch 1

Word count: 2520

Taglist:

February 2nd, 9:10pm, Eastern Standard time.

The night was like any other night in Brooklyn, it was quiet and calm. Just relaxing on the couch with my dog Chilè, with a cup of honey chai. The moment was blissful till I heard the front door slam shut.

“Well you're here late.” I sighed heavily and glanced at my on again off again boyfriend Damian, of 3 years. I’ve been allowing him to crash at my condo for a few weeks, till his apartment was done being fumigated.

Looking at the clock, it was 9:15pm. He’s been doing that a lot lately, which isn’t odd. I’m used to it by now but I always had a sneaky suspicion. We've been having all kinds of arguments lately and I have a feeling there is gonna be another one.

“Yeah? What about it? I’m here ain’t I?” He shrugged and placed a kiss on my head, before heading to my kitchen. “What’s for dinner?”

If the facial expression I had could kill, it would be deadly. “Nothing. I had already eaten with my family a few hours ago. You’ve been out all day, you could’ve found yourself some food.”

“All you had to do was make me some food, Kianna. That’s it. Not that hard to do.” The tone he had with me was uncalled for. I made my way to the kitchen, putting away the mug I had.

“Or you could just get up off your ass and cook ya damn self, Damian. You’re very capable of doing it.”

He chuckled deeply, and then glared at me. “It’s your job to feed your man, you know?”

“Not when he has his own hands and his own place to cook at. You have hands, use them. Dumbass.” I had had enough of his crap to the point where I was fed up. “You ain't shit for saying it’s my job to feed your ass. And you still ain’t shit for coming here late every night since I let you stay here. You do not even help around here.”

His arched brow was a draw in a battle. “I help around here you know.”

“Damian, no you do not.” rubs my forehead, I shook it in annoyance. “Whatever it is that you are really doing, I hope it is worth it. You ain't shit for how you've been treating me lately.”

“You ain’t shit! That’s why I cheated on you.”

And there it was. The honest truth finally reared its ugly head.

“Really? I ain’t shit?” I glared at him with an electrifying expression. “You’re really gonna stand here, and tell me that when the girl you're messing with doesn't really want your scrawny ass?!”

“Yeah right, we’ll see. She is better than you, you know that right?” His smug grin etched on his face, showing some kind of pride. We made it outside to the front of the condo, on the sidewalk.

I scoffed and began to walk away from him. “Whatever Damian. You can go fuck yourself! I’m done.”

“Yeah, yeah. We’ll see about that too. You always come crawling back to me.”

To get him away from me, I started walking backwards. He came closer with every insult he could muster, that is until I shoved his head with my middle and pointer finger. Which caused him to stumble back into a muddy rain puddle.

I stifled a laugh and then it came out in a full blow. I was holding my stomach in the process. It was too funny.

“What the fuck is so funny!? Help me up!” He demanded and tried to get up, but to no avail he kept sliding back into the mud.

I rested my hands on my knees and came into eye level view of him. “Oh nothing. Just you finally falling on your ass.”

“Stupid bitch! I swear to god I’m gonna-“

“You aren’t gonna do shit. Have fun with your little toy who you think loves you so much. I honestly should have cheated when I had the chance.” Dusting off my jeans, I headed back inside and locked the doors. Finally being rid from him for good, as I heard him yelling in the background.

“I really gotta change the locks. Good thing he left his keys on the counter.”

-10:30pm-

The whole argument replayed in my head over and over again as I laid on my bed, staring at the ceiling. A smile etched on my face as I finally achieved peace. I wasted 3 years of my life on and off with this guy, who really did not give a crap about me. On top of all that, I’m still in school to become a nurse no less. He was right about one thing though, I was always foolish to go back to him thinking he was gonna change. And he didn’t do it once at all.

I felt hot tears run down my high cheekbones, staining my light blue sweater. Having my heart broken this time around, I felt like the world was crashing around me. I normally ended things in my past relationships when moments got too hot or they didn’t last very long. This time it was different, cause I went with my heart instead of my head. I thought Damian was different, and boy was I wrong.

I couldn’t shake it out completely. Wounds don’t heal overnight, but I knew I had to be strong for myself. Gathering my thoughts, I managed to take a hot shower. As time passed I felt something touching my hand, as the hot water hit my rich sepia skin. I looked down at my left hand and saw an indigo colored spider crawling on top of it. Before I smashed it, it bit me.

“Shit!” I yelped silently in pain, soothing the back of my hand as much as I could. “That hurt like a bitch.”

-The next day-

After finishing my nursing exam, I had returned a phone call to my parents to check up on my siblings, as they were out on work business. I had gotten on the bus, and sat in the back. Looking at my hand thoroughly, from the bite, I noticed that it was gone but the bruising was still there.

“That was weird, It was just there yesterday.”

Getting to my destination, I made sure Mrs. Hamilton, the only neighbor my parents trusted to watch my siblings, was good to go. After that, I decided to take care of the wound on my hand, before I checked on my siblings to make sure they were asleep. Oftentimes, I’d wait for our parents to come home from work, on some late nights. Tonight was no different, as they were working late. As the older sister, my job was never done even though I lived 4 blocks away.

Placing a kiss upon each of their heads, I smiled gently to myself as I closed each door behind me, and headed to bed. The twins were my everything and I was honored to even be their sister. Trying my hardest to be the best example possible.

Once I was settled down for the night in my secondary room, I felt a bit better about everything. I drifted to sleep to prepare for my graduation obligations, and yet little did I know that that spider bite changed the rest of my life.

-4 years later-

“Alright Gwen. What am I supposed to be doing again?” I asked while wrapping my hands up with the boxing wraps, knowing I was already going to be sparing alone since I do my tasks alone anyway.

She thought a bit before snapping her fingers. “Try to destroy the targets in under a minute, without using your webs.”

“Done.” Smirking a bit, I leaped and flipped into the training module. Knocking out every single cardboard cutout in record time.

“45 seconds flat. Not bad, not too shabby at all. You gotta teach me how to do that backhand-spring into a roundoff.” She chuckled.

“It’s all in practice, kid. All in practice.” I smiled back, wiping the sweat off my brow. “I’m still shocked how the big guy does not know someone is using the training room.”

She shrugged as we walked out the room, after cleaning up. “He’s always at his computer screens anyway. Not like actually paying attention. Speaking of which, have you seen Hobie?”

Snickering a little I nodded. “Yeah he’s in my world, chillin with my cousin Saniyah, again. I’m sure he’ll be back soon though. I’m just glad they have each other.”

“For someone who doesn’t like labels, it seems as though he has a label when it comes to her.” Gwen chuckled a little.

“You could say that. At least they’re both happy and know the risks. If only it were actually possible to have a love life.”

The thought of them both being happy made me feel good. I was happy for them, and that’s what I wanted for myself. I practically had everything I’ve ever wanted except for a stable relationship.

I graduated from medical school, so I help the other spiders if need be in the medbay. I have a great job back home in my world. But there’s a lot of things missing in my life and I do not think it is possible to have a love life.

“Well, we just gotta find someone for you. You’re a great catch Kianna, and anyone would be lucky to date you.”

“Thanks for the encouragement Gwen. I needed it, truly I did. I’ve been in my head lately, and this talk helped.”

As we headed towards the cafeteria, a portal opened and Hobie came out of it. “Ello, ladies. What’s shakin?”

“Nothing much, just got done training with Gwen. How was your visit with my cousin?” I arched a brow and smirked at him. There was a slight tint of pink on his face that I could see.

“She’s just- I can’t describe it Kiki. She’s amazing, truly. Thank you for introducing us, love.” His voice cracked a bit describing how he felt about my cousin. Thus, causing Gwen and I both to chuckle.

“Well I’m glad you think so. Because she is, even though she isn’t a spider.”

“I’m perfectly fine with it. A cat and a spider, opposites attract in my book.” He nodded in his typical cool way.

Like a switch went off, he inquired a bit. “Speaking of opposites, have you and Miguel talked yet? You’ve been here for like 3 years now.”

“He’s only spoken to me about missions, at least 4 times, which was at least 50 missions with you and Jess. I’ve been doing medical stuff since I’ve been here.” I shrugged and grabbed an empanada. Biting into it, my face contorted in disgust.

“Whoever made these needs to be handled accordingly. These are nasty.”

Hobie and Gwen both let out a gut busting laugh, minimal tears coming out their eyes. Rolling my fireball red colored eyes at the two, a smile creeped up my face. I enjoyed my time at HQ every now and then. It was a second home after all.

“I agree. Not enough flavor.” A deep baritone voice said behind me. We all stopped and turned around to see Miguel himself in the cafeteria. He was taller than I remember last time, which didn’t really mean anything but it was significant. Miguel stood at a whopping 5’10, almost 6 ft height, compared to my 5’9.

“Boss man. What are you doing down here, with us common folk?” Hobie broke the silence.

“Well I wanted to know what all the laughter was about and came down.” He glanced over at me longer than I anticipated. His scarlet red eyes gave me a once over, piercing into my soul.

Arching a well trimmed brow, I crossed my arms over my chest “Seeing something you like, O’Hara?”

He scoffed and shrugged. “Not really, just wondering what you all are doing. Carry on and try not to be so loud, alright?”

“You got it!” Gwen smiled nervously and we all watched him walk away. “That was weird.”

“You’re telling me. Imma go shower and take a nap. See y’all later.”

Leaving them to their own devices, I went to my little apartment in HQ. It was a smaller version of my house back home but doable. The steam of the shower eased the aches in my muscles, soothing them out in the process. The jets of the water pressure made it even more relaxing. Upon lathering my brown sugar body scrub on my legs, I had images pop in my head. I could not make out why my head was swimming with images I didn’t recognize but it seemed familiar.

Getting ready for bed, I made sure to tie my box braids down and drifted into a deep slumber. The images were clearer now. I could finally make out Miguel’s suit and my own, drifting away from the nano tech that had made them. Why was I dreaming of my boss and a new suit? Little did I know the dream version of me wanted him more than anything in the world. A soft groan left my full lips, as I tossed and turned in my sheets, the images shifted to a more sultry scene of Miguel and I in a very compromising position.

I jolted up from the bed, breathing heavily. Trying to catch my breath and make sense of it all. “I really do not need this shit right now.”

Rubbing my head to calm myself down, my phone rang and I noticed an odd caller ID. It was Miguel. “Hello?”

“Delgado. Sorry to bother you but we gotta go, team mission. See you downstairs in 10 minutes.” And just like that, he hung up.

A deep sigh escaped me as I grabbed my bracelet to have my suit on me. All I had on was a purple Nike sports bra; matching spandex shorts and slipped on my sneakers. Upon walking out the door, I felt something sharp prick my bottom lip. I looked in the mirror on the wall.

“Ouch! What was that? Did I bite my lip?” I was worried and confused till I saw a set of decent sized fangs pop out in four places. “Holy shit.”

I didn’t have time to be fascinated over them, I’d have to deal with that another time. I met the team downstairs at HQ, just in time. I slipped my head cover for my suit on, and noticed a rip on the back.

“Damn it. I’ll have to fix that.”

“Ready to go?” Hobie asked as he saw me pull my braids into a bun.

“As I’ll ever be.” We all got into the portal, surrounded by fluorescent colors.

I couldn’t get thoughts of Miguel and I out of my head from a bit ago in my dreams. What could it mean exactly? Who knows really, I just hope it’s nothing life changing.

[whentherewerebicycles]

snuggly little girl is finally allowed back into the bed after several weeks of being banished due to houseguests :) she is very warm and sleepy and happy about it.

it’s an overcast morning and I woke up feeling bleh but I’m trying to acknowledge the feeling and not get stuck in it. I am working from home today and my tasks are a little ill-defined so I do need to make sure I get up, get dressed, and sit at a desk at some point to ensure I actually focus. here’s what I’d like to do:

7:30-8:30 coffee, lounge, work from bed

8:30 get up and get dressed

8:30-11:30 work session

11:30-12:30 shower/get ready

1-2 ND mtg

2-4 windshield appt—second work session. call Cigna while waiting, finish other work tasks, schedule-send emails to four faculty for next week, make a plan for next week

4-5ish wrap up work if needed

walk the dogs… it’s time to get back into it. I have a hockey podcast to listen to and can start with an easy 40-45 min loop

eat leftovers for dinner & make cold brew to steep overnight

finish ninth house (I’m powering through but letting myself skim the boring parts)

bed by 10 (I’m slowly trying to reset my sleep/wake times to 9:15pm/5:30 or 6am)

okay. I also am open to doing some work over the weekend if 1) it’s fun, and 2) it consoles me (as it often does lol). but here are the things I want to prioritize in today’s work sessions:

review makerspace brainstorming notes and distill conversation into a core list of ideas

organize list by priorities (immediate, academic year, future/aspirational)

figure out some way of annotating priority list. I want to identify the big steps each one would take to research/create/implement, note who on the team we could delegate specific pieces of the work to, and identify the other people or units on campus we’d want to partner with. this will be so fun.

JG asked if I could give an overview of my big priorities for my program next year so he could better understand how this initiative fits into those priorities. I think that’s a great ask and a great opportunity for me to sit down and synthesize what I’ve learned in my first month in the role. one big amorphous thing I’m tasked with is increasing the number of faculty who are incorporating research into their courses, and I was thinking the other day that instead of trying to do this across all majors in a scattershot way, I could use this makerspace access initiative as a focusing lens for that work this year. and then since that project is naturally STEM + business-leaning, maybe I can look for a manageably sized humanities initiative to take on next year too, so there’s a good balance within my portfolio of projects. anyway I think I’m at the point where I have talked to enough people and said yes or tentatively yes to enough things that I am ready to sit down and start drawing up a summer + academic year plan. also I’m not quite there yet but I might almost be ready to start mapping out the calendar so I can do some initial thinking in that direction today if I feel like it. oh and I want to make a note for myself to look for specific areas where I can consult or bring in the person in our office who was handling aspects of my job for a long time before I started… I feel like I can bulldoze a bit when I’m enthusiastic about an idea or project and I don’t want her to feel like I’m undoing all the work she put into building programming etc. so I want to really consciously build in checkpoints where I’m asking for her feedback or drawing on her expertise in a substantive/meaningful way so she doesn’t feel like I swept in and changed everything to fit my own vision.

meet with ND to gather info about student employee development redesign (then spend time updating my earlier notes)

I don’t think I’ll get much deeper into the student worker redesign project today but it might be a thing I block off time for this weekend or next week.

schedule four emails to faculty/staff (should include YP, DH, MK, and maybe BW?)

I think that’s good!! wow and just working on a work plan for today has already put me in a much better & more hopeful mood. time to get started!

[amnotaqueen]

Now He Is Done With Me

So, last night my husband arrived home with our son at 10:15pm. For over 8 hrs, our son was with him and all it looks like they had to eat was a small bag of popcorn that they both shared. I saw the bag with some of it in the trash can in our kitchen. Around 10:30 pm he was eating dinner. They woke me up when they got home (I had gone to bed around 9:15pm). I could not go back to sleep.

I was still awake past 4 am. I had been piddling around and reading and watching some videos on my phone when my husband came in. I didnt get much sleep. In the morning, my husband took our son to the meeting without me. He did not give him breakfast. I did feel ok about it though because I was hoping our son was not that hungry anywayvsince they had eaten a late dinner. Just proves my fear that if it depended on my husband alone, our son would skip mealsand be made to fast regularly.

For the past few days he made occasional attempts to show interest in me, dropping crumbs. For so many years, dropping crumbs worked. I felt so happy to be given the slightest attention, so hopeful that it would lead to a better relationship, that I would immediately act like all was well and so we could move forward in the right direction. Problem was, things never moved in the right direction for longer than 48 hours. The exact same dismissive attitudes, uncaring behavior, unloving and selfish treatment always returned. He always reverted back to showing me that he has no love for me. It's a sickening, depressing, anxiety-inducing cycle.

So, these latest attempts were falling flat on me. I thought he was probably just doing things because someone told him to. But his attempts also came after I had learned to 'grey rock' him for an extended period of time. I had been remaining silent, non-reactive to anything he did or said. This is something I started to do because he is making me more concerned about the welfare of our son, and he is starting to regularly take trips for days telling me I can't go and not providing address and names of who he is staying with. I had decided that it was very suspicious and that especially with his history of having at least one extra-marital relationship (evidence of romantic relationship but no evidence found of sexual intercourse) that leaving me and going places without me indicated that he may be cheating again. I also decided that it was probably in my best interest to not have sex with him so I would not be exposed to any STDs should he actually be cheating on me. We had gone weeks without sex.

He started to come in to say goodnight after not speaking to me all day. After the blow out at Carlsbad Caverns, he heard me telling someone else I wanted to go to Colorado. So he asked me if I wanted to go to Colorado for our anniversary. I had no intention of celebrating our anniversary because, frankly, there is nothing to celebrate. He himself did not offer to do it because he values our relationship and wants to celebrate. He was simply going to take me probably so that he could say that he took me somewhere for our anniversary. If any of his friends ask what we did for our anniversary, he could tell them he took me to Colorado. Im sure he is painting a picture for them that Im well and our son is well and we have a good marriage and happy family.

We have no one to watch our son for us, by the way, and he wasn't planning to spend money on hiring a sitter. So our son would have been going with us on our weekend anniversary trip to Colorado. I told him that I didn't want to go. So he can flip out because I feed our son a meal or snack? Im tired of going places with him and being scared of how he will treat me and our son, wondering if he will abandon us or endanger us, how he will abuse us away from home.

Mind you, he is talking about an anniversary trip to Colorado and coming in to hug me at night all of a sudden when he has recently lied to me about our joint tax refund refusing to give me a copy, and telling me I can't go with him to the UK or to his Nigerian get-together with his friends in Georgia, and refusing to honor his promise to take me stargazing because he became furious when I gave our son two 60 calorie fruit snack packs when our son had not eaten much that day and had good behavior.

So, we didn't go. No sex. I'm learning to accept that he will not change. I want to break this endless cycle of being mistreated and acting like eveything is fine when he wants to have sex. I want to set boundaries to protect myself. I have to regain and protect my sanity. He came in one day, acting like he wanted to talk.

For ten years, our talking has been pointless because he is only interested in talking himself, not listening. He is not interested in true communication. He is interested in dictating to me how he wants things to be. He is interested in me adopting his thoughts and beliefs and never disagreeing with him. Disagreeing becomes a debate to win for him. Talking to him has always led to yelling, insulting, and devaluing me. He doesn't talk to resolve issues and compromise. He talks to inflict pain, to add gasoline to a fire. His talk is empty and circular, often nonsensical, and I just end up frustrated trying to explain to him what he is pretending not to understand. Talking is gaslight time for him.

Plus, why would I talk to a person who lies to me so often and freely. I told him he wasnt honest. He asked me, "about what?" He was fishing to see what I knew he was lying about without admitting he was lying. There are so many things he ies about or leaves me in the dark about. Like the tax return. Like sending money to people in Nigeria. I told him I didn't want to talk. Why, I asked him.

He actually said so we can be more than roommates. I've said that we are like roommates time and again and begged him to work with me, listen to me, compromise with me so that we could apply Bible principles and be more than roommates. He has never been interested. Nor was he truly interested this time.

It was like he was trying to butter me up so that he could have sex with me right before he leaves for the UK . He is never interested in fixing our marriage. He is never truly interested in my feelings. So I had been rebuffing him. He was trying to have sex. I was trying not to have sex. But I knew the inevitable would come.

Early this morning when I couldn't sleep, he came into the bedroom just trying to have sex. No questions like, "Why are you still up? Are you OK?" Just being touchy- feely. I told him that I had been up since they got back at 10:15pm, that they had woken me up. He quickly said, 'sorry'. But he proceeded to try to have sex with me. He didn't care that I wasn't getting enough sleep and would probably miss the meeting. All he cared about was sex. Ultimately, I did not have sex with him. I told him he wanted to have sex but didn't want to tell me the truth and didn't want to take me to the UK with him. He said we could go to the UK another time. I told him that I don't know who he is with or what he is doing when he tells me I can't come with him and doesn't even tell me where he is going exactly, and therefor didn't know if he could be cheating on me and would give me STD.

Eventually, he left the room. Now, I realize that by denying him sex this would cause major problems. Because, in his mind, only he can and should deny me and our son of anything he chooses. He is justified to do so for any reason he likes. We,on the other hand, are obligated to comply with any demand he makes even if it is to our detriment. Noncompliance is never tolerated well. This is an insult to him, a great offense that cannot be forgiven. There is not valid excuse for me to not have sex with him. He can unapologeticallytreat me like a doormat or trash, but I must still have sex with him. He accepts no responsibility for why I would be in fear of him cheating on me any possibly giving me an STD. He said that offended him. But he can't see why I'm offended by him lying to me and telling me I can't go with him to gatherings of friends and to the UK for a friend's wedding.

Basically, he is done with me. If Im not putting out, and he us already good with his citizenship, what use do I have? He certainly isnt willing to adjust a thing about himself to save our marriage and family. He has worked exceedingly hard to own a business, but far, far less energy is put into our marriage. He told me he would divorce me now if it weren't for our son. So, as soon as our son is 18, he is divorcing me. He doesnt care about making things easier on our son. He probably thinks he is going to try to avoid having to pay child support to me by waiting until our son is 18.

When I first got married as a Jehovah's Witness, the idea of divorce was so foreign. It's shocking to me that I'm facing divorce. The way I have been treated by my husband,a fellow Jehovah's Witness, has been exceedingly shocking and devastating to me. I have been traumatized beyond measure. I wish I were a stronger person.

[anxiouspregnantlady]

8+2

Hii, back with a quick update.

I started taking a full tablet of unisom with my b6 a couple of days ago, but still find myself feeling bad from lunchtime on. Very exhausted. I am done by about 9:15pm and it's a battle to wash up and pee and stuff. Up in the middle of the night at least once, sometimes 3x, to pee. Boobs and nipples still sore. Also milk still comes out when I squeeze, lol. Did I say tired? The burping and heartburn has calmed down a bit.

Excitingly, I think my morning post-pee belly is starting to pop just a little. It's at quite a precise angle too, similar to how my beginning belly was with P. My end of day belly is huge, but I usually have quite the bloat going on anyway, so shrug. I do *feel* more stretched out though, and I feel more of an obstruction when I'm leaning over the kitchen counter to wash dishes.

I've made quite a lot of progress with my wardrobe. This pregnancy is very different from with P because I am working ~in person~ twice a week with clients and I would like to try and keep the pregnancy under wraps til at least 20 weeks. Just because of the nature of my relationship with my clients, where it is kind of disruptive/distracting for the focus to be on me and my personal life. SO, I've scored quite a few finds via thrifting! Mostly elastic waist pants - I have an olive green tencel pair, a wide leg black trouser, and the everlane dream pant. I also got some straight leg, high rise black gap jeans from goodwill and inserted a triangular elastic at each of the side seams so I have 4-6 more inches in the waist. My gripe with maternity jeans is they are so non-subtle, they are sooooo low rise, and they are ALL SKINNY JEANS!!! WHY!!! I guess it's easier for the jeans to stay up? Anyway, I LOVE the result and I'm actually wearing them now. I'm also trying to find tops that are a bit more flowy at the bottom. This is a big style adjustment because I've really leaned into the mom vibe lately and am more of a high waisted tucked in kinda person. But. More than happy to have to make a change.

OK last thing omg my sneak peek gender result got turned around ridiculously fast and the result is SITTING IN MY FREAKING INBOX. I'm attempting to not look for TWO WEEKS because I thought it would be really special for my SIL to surprise us. But then I realized I wanted to wait until everything was good at our 10w appointment before doing such a daringly celebratory kind of thing. Anxiety or sensibility? Who knows. It's my pregnancy. K doesn't think I can wait. But I think I can. I've archived it so it isn't staring at me.

I think it's a boy, to the extent that I will quite shocked if it's a girl.

Have to go work, lolz. The nausea is quite a bummer. But at least I can eat, and I have only thrown up once, thank you medications. Oh and I finally picked up a diclegis prescription today. Insurance denied the generic brand, weird enough, but I paid $0 for brand name. Things i've been craving - boba, fried chicken, blueberry bagel

[truckreincarnation]

To Quote Wendy Williams, "THE KILLER IS ESCAPING!" | Bian Le | Trial 3.1 | ATTN: Shin | RE: Esmee, Manami

"I... I think I know who the third person is. Well, not exactly who. But I can narrow it down and put some label on it...?"

Bian speaks up suddenly. Her voice is still small, and it wavers silently, but she seems to be stable enough to keep going. After her outbursts in the past trial, she's doing everything she can to stay calm and not fall back into panic.

"It mostly hinges on what I saw, and what others have claimed to see. I'd have to hear from Shin to confirm a few things, but for now... I should start with my own testimony.

...I was in the storage room alone from 7 to 8:15PM. There were so few memories left, and I was worried that mine would be next. Mine is... it's very graphic, is all I feel comfortable sharing. I wanted to be alone if it hit, so I chose a place I didn't think anyone would go. This means that whoever took the lance Manami, Esmee and I found broken in the storage room had to come after that point.

After that, I left for the fountain area. Nao was there, so I said hi. I also saw Avery and Theophania, but they were having a conversation, so I didn't want to interrupt. I was only there for about two minutes.

After, I left for the smithy, and I stayed there until the body was found. I got there at about 8:18PM. I talked with the Smith for some time. I saw a few people come and go, interestingly. Vee got there at around 8:40PM, and joined our chat. It was a very tame conversation, all things considered. Vee then left at 9:20PM. I decided to just draw in silence while the Smith worked,,, parallel play does wonders...

I was alone again until 10:02, when Nao came by. I showed them my drawing, and then looked around at the Smith's items for a bit. They didn't buy anything, though. They were gone 10:15. Only ten minutes later, at 10:25, Shin showed up for a moment. I assume he could sense Frank was in danger since they were bond mates. He ran off, and only three minutes later was the body found.

The only question I have is how long was Shin searching? This might narrow things down, but... we'll have to see."

With her testimony out of the way, Bian starts to sketch something out in her journal, nodding to herself.

"I'll be blunt. The killer had to be the "third unknown person."  Esmee and Manami are completely correct. There's many reasons for this... but I can explain it.

For one, Meili died at 10:23, and Shin found the body only five minutes later. Frank was never killed, too. This seems... off to me. It's a fortunate coincidence that Frank can't remember anything, yes? You would think the killer would make sure to take Frank out too. They could've falsely assumed he died already, but still... that's a giant risk to take... unless the killer somehow knew Frank wouldn't remember this, leaving him alive was extremely risky.

And with how narrow the timeframe was, I don't know if the killer could've left the scene before Shin arrived. That's a five minute time frame, which may be doable, but I can't imagine the killer immediately taking off. They likely would've been trying to clean up, dispose evidence- anything else. They also could've been waiting to see if Frank passed naturally- means less of a headache or evidence against them....

We tested this, and the killer could've been caught with the fountain's secret entrance open. They likely had to be careful. Which leads me to my next point... the killer had to use hide in plain sight. They could've also used it during the murder or right after to be safe, too. This way, if the body was found, they could easily run out and come in while pretending to have an alibi.

Not only that- the murder itself started in the fountain room, up the stairs. We all saw the damage there... the killer could've hid in plain sight there with how visible the room is. Just in case somebody went in, right? They also could've been trying to sneak up on Frank and Meili. There's many possibilities, but... they all suggest hiding in plain sight.

If that isn't enough... why else would someone hide in plain sight at the scene of the crime right after it took place? If someone came so close to the time of the murder to hide in plain sight, then they had to have seen the killer. An accomplice is pointless, because it's all risk and no reward, especially when getting the killer wrong still puts the accomplice at risk. If someone stayed behind for other reasons, that'd only cast false suspicion on them... the killer has to be the third person."

Bian stares back down at her journal, frowning, before suddenly turning the pages to the end- opening up the magic journal.

"I almost forgot... this isn't relevant to my point, but Frank and Meili made plans in the journal after Frank's memory was shared. They were going to play music together. It's right in there if you look..."

[keefwho]

October 22 - 2023 Sunday

9:14am

Even though it feels cringe, I'm going to try to read the day before's entry every morning. I feel like I should be able to do that without cringing at myself. It's like I can't even stand by my own words. I just dump feelings and shamefully look away. Maybe reading what I did yesterday can help me get a grip and try something different today. It'll also help to notice patterns I might be missing. Whether it does or not, this is an "action" I can take. An actual thing I can do that will yield some kind of results as long as I actually do it.

10:43am

In a way I'm afraid to do anything. I feel fear thinking about doing Inktober, or streaming a game, or hanging out with someone. I feel like I'm gonna mess up everything today. I'm afraid to act on anything.

1:09pm

I hear people talk about their girlfriends/boyfriends and can't understand how they easily fall in and out of relationships when I've only ever had 1 where we used that kind of label and it was when I was a teenager. Or how do people end up being in a happy relationship where they can proudly say they have a partner? Why is that so hard to achieve? Why can't it just be as simple as "We are so close and like each other a lot, lets just be boyfriend/girlfriend already." For some reason it just isn't like that. It probably has something to do with me and how fucked up I am. I'm the one here who lacks most forms of interpersonal experience. I fear I am doomed to a life of loneliness.

I'm so out of touch with everything it feels like.

4:03pm

I took a hit again and it's probably the last time I'm gonna do it to cope with my feelings. I'm not having a bad trip or anything, I just know it's bad and I feel dirty about it. I don't know who this "Keith" guy is but I don't support his behavior lately. I don't want to be this. I know what I want to be, I literally just have to do it. I feel a little better about it though. High assisted or not, I've been trying very hard to understand my own humanity and the humanity of others. I've been perspective taking, understanding how much it means when someone asks how my day is or updates me with pictures of their cat or where they're going. I thought about the past and how closed off and hollow it is, why do I like to stay there? Everyone else is present and ever changing. The present offers possibilities, the past is done. Its not to be forgotten but it's not to be lived in either. I wish I could get a better grasp on how I used to feel. I can't remember having this constant darkness deep inside me but maybe it was better hidden. I don't want to believe I could have regressed, especially when I've made so much progress in other places. I simultaneously want to go back to who I was but also don't want to lose the progress I know I've made. Who I was was very limited as a person. I think with great sadness comes great happiness. I've opened up a window to growing in ways I couldn't have before. If I can only learn to see hope like I used to. If I can only understand how things really can change and happen. Thats what I miss. Thats what I've lost. I've done so well with everything else but I lost this important component. Deep down I know who I am but I don't know who I can become. I don't understand what other things can become.

11:15pm

Today I woke up from a dream where Daisy and I got a cabin together and it was great, there was lots of very intimate cuddling and touching. I remember pressing my chest to her naked back holding her and how good it felt. At some point the dream turned into dealing with this homeless guy who wanted to stay in our house. He had a little pet alligator sorta like Gummy and about the size of a kitten. He told me not to let it bite me because it's teeth were very sharp but I let it anyways and my hand started to bleed pretty bad. We threw him and his gator off the mountain.

For breakfast I made sausage, mac n cheese, and had some cereal on the side. Afterwards I was trying to figure out how to launch VRchat and Legendary Tales at the same time so I could Vtube better but that was impossible unfortunately. I tried streaming for about 2 hours which went okay aside from no one showing up except for the guy that calls me Sleepy. I truly hate him. Good thing he only messaged twice. After my failure of a stream I decided to take a hit in preparation to blow myself because I felt like it and wanted that immersion. I did my dishes and looked at stuff while waiting for it to kick in. When it did I remember not being totally in the mood for it anymore but doing it anyways because I wasn't gonna waste the opportunity. It turned out okay, I had fun but it lasted a very very long time. After steaming in the shower for awhile and almost falling asleep in there, I made spaghettios for my 2 hour late breakfast. I snacked on some chips while watching a minecraft stream until I sobered up. I took a 40 minute desk nap at the end of that. I finally decided to do my Inktober and enjoy my evening. I cranked it out along with a small commission edit and uploaded those 2 things. After that Daisy was free and we watched Chris Chan while we both worked. I sketch Mr Mumbles and us as He Man and Cringer. I felt loose about it all, I was able to reach that rare state of really letting go and enjoying the process of art while I use it to express myself. Often times I adhere to too many rules and expectations. I was going to play Legendary Tales while Daisy went to bed but my game froze and I lost my permadeath character to that so I hopped on Zelda instead while she went to sleep.

[rowanaelinn]

Illicit Affairs - Chapter Thirty-Nine

Masterlist

A/N: hey! if you have time after this chapter, maybe you could check another story I am writing with my incredible friend @morganofthewildfire? It’s called Tied Me To You, and if you love yourself some childhood friends to lovers and second chance romance… This fic is for you!

This was all written in less than a day, so please, be indulgent when it comes to my editing! I was just too excited to share this!

Warnings: Lots of language | Word Count: 6,000

Her head was pounding when she opened her eyes, enough to make her wince. The light was too bright for her eyes, she let out a quiet sob. She didn’t want to wake up, why did she have to? Someone let out a groan beside her, and it wasn’t hard to know it was Dorian.

“Close the lights,” he growled from where he laid on the floor.

“I can’t just turn off the sun,” she answered, her throat sore. She had done too much last night. Maybe doing too much was her mantra. She wasn’t exactly sure it was something to be proud of.

She fought against the throbbing pain in her head and opened her eyes. The living room was in a mess, which she supposed was the way a room should look after a party took place there.

When they started drinking yesterday, Lysandra and Chaol joined them, though they were much, much calmer than Dorian and Aelin. The both of them went to sleep early while Dorian and Aelin kept the party going.

Though she wasn’t sure she could exactly call that a party. She tatted on the table, looking for her phone. She held in another groan when she saw all the notifications on her home screen. She wiped them away; she wasn’t in the mood to be assaulted by texts at… eleven in the morning.

Her heart melted for a second at the sight of her home screen wallpaper. It was picture of Rowan, Aelin and Helia in vacation. They were laying on double sundecks, bathing into the sun.

It was the perfect picture to use, if only because neither Rowan nor Helia were recognizable. Rowan was laying on his side, back to the camera. His tattooed arm wasn’t visible, his silvery hair hidden by a hat. He was hugging her, his head nuzzled into her shoulder. Helia was laying on Aelin’s front, splayed out onto her and Aelin could almost hear her snoring. The only person awaken on this picture was Aelin. Her grin was bright on that picture, brighter than she had seen it in years. She loved that picture.

She opened her text app, only to find multiple texts Rowan had sent last night. And apparently, in her drunk daze, Aelin had texted him back a couple of times.

Rowan, 9:01pm: Tell me when you are home.

Rowan, 9:28pm: Aelin? Please, tell me if you’re home safe.

Rowan, 10:03pm: If you are mad, be mad. But don’t ignore me.

Aelin, 10:05pm: im safe buzzard

Rowan, 10:06pm: Come back, please. We can talk this out. I miss you.

Aelin, 10:13pm: can’t. im busy! ;)

She then sent a picture of her, Dorian and a bottle of tequila between their two smiling faces, their eyes red and smiles all wrong. They were so obviously drunk.

Rowan, 10:15pm: Are you drunk?

Rowan, 10:23pm: Please, be careful.

Rowan, 10:45pm: I miss you, Aelin. Things are going to work out, I promise.

Rowan, 11:52pm: Good night, Fireheart. Text me when you’re awake.

Oh, gods. He’d clearly voiced his concern for her last night, and she… ignored him. He didn’t seem angry in his texts, which she supposed was a good thing. It was hypocritical of her as she was the one who started a fight with him the day before, but she didn’t think she could handle it if Rowan was mad at her.

On the other hand, Aelin was allowed to have a night with her friends. He was the one who told her she cut everyone else off, so it wasn’t a bad thing if she did spend time with other people.

“My head is killing me,” Dorian’s voice was as broken as hers.

She chuckled, “Of course it does, pretty boy.”

He looked up from where he laid on the floor, raised on his elbows. “You think I’m pretty?”

She used her foot to push on his shoulder which made him crash face first. She laughed, hiding her face into her hands. It hurt to laugh but she didn’t stop, Dorian was so dramatic. She needed someone like that in her life.

She got up, still in yesterday’s clothes. “I’m making some coffee.”

Maybe she should call Rowan, though from what time it was, he was in class. Her class, the one she was supposed to attend. Fuck. Even if she jumped into fresh clothes now and that she drove to school she would still miss his class.

A note had been left onto the coffee machine.

Went to class, I will take notes for the two of you.

Rest, you deserve it! Take care,

Lys.

Great, as if she cares about the notes. All Aelin cared about was her professor, though she supposed Lysandra couldn’t know that. At least, Aelin’s tongue didn’t loosen up under the alcohol’s weight.

Dorian joined her into the kitchen, pouring them two glasses of water and placed one pain killer next to each glass. She thanked him and sat, waiting for the coffee to be ready. She drank the entire glass of water in one go, her throat and mouth feeling dry.

“Are you feeling better?”

She knew he didn’t ask that about her hangover. She shrugged, “I think I cried enough for three years last night.”

“That’s not an answer.”

Last night, after maybe her fifth shot, she burst into tears. She hadn’t stopped for hours. Her eyes still hurt, and she wasn’t keen into looking into a mirror right now. She needed ice. A lot of it.

Aelin shrugged, “I have no idea how I feel, if I’m being honest. It just… It doesn’t feel real.”

He nodded, standing to pour them two cups of burning coffee. “Don’t take this the wrong way, Aelin, but why did you come to us yesterday? When something is wrong, you usually go to your boyfriend. Has he done something?”

She shook her head, “No, no he is… the best. I was with him yesterday before I drove back here. But we… I picked a fight with him, I think I wanted him to be angry at me so I wouldn’t have to do it myself, you know?” He nodded. “But he didn’t, he didn’t insult me or yelled at me like I wanted him to.”

“What happened then?”

She took a deep breath, sipping on her coffee. “He has a daughter.”

“Oh.”

“She is… the light of my life. I love her so much, I don’t think words are enough to describe how much I love this little girl. But she… she picked up a habit of calling me mommy, it’s not all the time just… sometimes. She did yesterday, and I think it was too much. I realized I would never have someone to truly call me mommy, to consider me their mom. This girl, she is just… lost.”

“Where is her mom?”

“She passed in a car accident, she gave birth that same day. They never met.”

“It’s heartbreaking,” Dorian breathed, looking down at his smoking drink. “But… Maybe she isn’t lost, maybe she does see you as a mother. I mean, how old is she?”

“Going on four.”

“It’s young, and if she has no memory of her birth mother… What I’m trying to say is that you spend your days there, you love her very much too. I think you and I are the best to know that blood doesn’t mean anything, look at our families.”

“I cannot pretend to be her mother,” Aelin answered, pain in her voice. She wish she could, really she did. “I-Her father and I we are hiding from the entire world. She has known me only for a few months, Dorian. It would need years of trust being built for me to even pretend I could be a mother to her. Have you seen the mess I am? The first inconvenience and I run away to get drunk with friends.”

“Aelin,” he said. “Yesterday was not the first inconvenience. You learned something that truly hurt you and changed your entire future. Hell, you could have driven to a bar and gotten drunk alone, instead to sought help to a friend.”

“You’re trying to make me feel better.”

“Yes, but it doesn’t mean I’m lying.” He covered her wrist with his warm palm. “You are one of the best person I have ever met, Aelin. I have no idea how you just… survive everything life throws in your face.”

“I’m not that strong.”

He nodded, “You are. If I had a twin and I lost them the way you did… I wouldn’t be where you are, Aelin.”

She swallowed difficultly, her voice rough as she asked, “I told you about Celaena yesterday, didn’t I?”

He nodded again, “I have no idea how you just took everything in. But you did, and this is being strong. Yesterday you didn’t lash out at that girl, in a way you protected her by running away. Being a mother it’s not just taking everything in with no reactions, it doesn’t mean you are not human anymore.”

“But R-“ she stopped herself before she could say his name. “My boyfriend, her father, he is so good at it.”

“He has had almost four years to perfect it, and I… I assume he is older, isn’t he?”

She nodded. She didn’t want to say anything, didn’t want Dorian to find out. If it was just her, Aelin would tell him. But Helia… If it backfired, Helia would suffer from these consequences.

Helia and Rowan were the best thing to happen to Aelin, and no matter how much Rowan told her she could tell the people she trusted, she wouldn’t. Not if these was one tiny chance it would hurt them.

“You are still young, no matter how mature you are. Allow yourself time to grow, Ae.”

She sniffed and chuckled through the tears forming in her eyes, “When did you became so wise?”

He shrugged, a secret smile on his lips. “Being in a relationship changes you, doesn’t it?”

She nodded, “Yeah, it does.”

“Do you also sometimes feel as if you are taking too much from your partner? That you rely too much on them.”

She snorted, “All the damn time.”

“I’m not the only one, then,” he said, a hopeful look on his face.

“Thank you, Dorian. Thank you so much.”

—-

Aelin was patiently waiting in front of Rowan’s office door. She had forgotten her keys at his place last night, so she was cursed to wait for him to come. If he ever would. He didn’t always stopped by his university office, but it was worth a try.

If he didn’t come here, she would knock at his house’s door but… She didn’t want Helia to be exposed to their fight.

Should she text him? Tell him where she was, that she wanted to have a talk. But if he was busy… She could wait. His job should come first, he has always taken days off because of her appointments.

“Miss Galathynius?”

Her head snapped to the side, she awkwardly stood almost crashing onto the floor a few times. “Professor Whitethorn.” He looked her up and down, as if making sure she was okay. “Could we have a talk?”

He nodded, opening his office. “Of course.” He looked around, making sure no one was around. “Come in.”

She gave him a small, shy smile. She felt so, so guilty. She… she hadn’t asked him how he felt about it all. He closed the door behind them, and she barely had the time to open her mouth before he pulled her into a warm, tight hug.

“Oh,” she let out, surprised before she gripped him tightly. She pressed her head into his chest and breathed him in, it only hit her then how unhappy she felt if he wasn’t around. “This feels good.”

“It does,” he answered, squeezing her more. “I was worried for you, baby.”

“I’m sorry,” she said into his chest. She had no idea if he heard or understood her but he kissed her forehead.

“It’s okay, it’s okay,” he breathed. “I’m not mad.”

She pulled back enough to look at his face, “How could you not? The way I acted…”

“Was because you were mad at yourself,” he finished for her. “Not at me, I know that. And I repeat, it’s okay.”

Her bottom lip wobbled, tears burning her eyes. It was only when she saw him, saw the vulnerability in his own eyes that she breathed, “It’s not fair. It’s not fair, Rowan.”

He nodded, silver lining in his green eyes. “I know, I know it’s not.”

Tears were steaming down her face now. Apparently, she hadn’t cried enough yesterday. She shook her head, “It was just a stupid party to annoy our parents. It was just that,” she tried to push on his shoulders, trying to get him away from her. He didn’t let go, he kept her flushed with his body. “But I keep losing things because of that stupid night.”

“Aelin…”

“I lost Celaena, then my parents became so cold and distant and now… And now that stupid night is taking away my future. Why? Tell me why,” she demanded, her voice rising. She was mad, she was mad at the entire world. She was mad at herself. Life would have been so different if she had just said no, if she hadn’t wanted to get back at her parents for yet another lonely night.

They weren’t paying the full price. She was.

“I can’t,” he breathed. “I can’t tell you why, because I don’t know. But I know I’m here,” he said, tucking a strand of her hair behind her ear. “Whatever life throws at you; it throws it at both of us.”

She shook her head, “It’s not fair. I don’t deserve that; I don’t deserve all this pain.”

“You are right, you don’t,” he nodded, cupping her cheeks and kissed her. “I love you. Things are going to be alright; we have solutions if we want them. This is hard, but it’s going to be okay as long as we have each other, alright?”

“How do you feel about that?” She asked, because she needed to know. It was her body but… he wanted his life with her. In the long run, it would affect him.

“I am…” He stopped for a second, breathing in. “Not doing too well, but I’m more focused on you now.”

“I’m so—”

He shut her up with a kiss, a hand covering the nape of her neck. “Don’t you apologize, alright?”

She nodded, rising on her tiptoes to steal a kiss out of him. He kept their mouth pressed together for a few more seconds, as if he would never get enough of her.

“Was Helia mad at me?”

He shook his head, “I don’t think she could be mad at you even if she wanted. She was just confused, but I told her it was nothing to worry about.”

“Thank you, and I’m sorry for freaking out when she called me mommy, it was just…”

“Too much,” he finished for her, and she nodded. Yes. It was too much. “I understand, Aelin. Stop apologizing for everything, none of it is your fault.”

“Thank you,” she whispered.

His forehead fell against hers, the two of them breathing the same air. “How’s your head?”

She groaned, letting out a half-fake, half-real sob. “It’s killing me, don’t remind me.”

He chuckled, “You looked cozy with that Tequila.”

“Make me promise to never drink again.”

He narrowed his eyes at her, “I think I already made you promise such a thing twice now. You broke that promise that same amount of time.”

“Ugh,” she closed her eyes, enjoying his proximity. “You’re so not funny.”

He shook his head and grinned, “Sit, I’ll get us some coffee, alright?”

She nodded, kissing him in thanks. She laid on the couch, because she was even too tired to sit. The material was stiff under her, Rowan really needed to change that couch. If only for her back’s sake.

A phone pinged, and it wasn’t hers. She looked around the room to find Rowan’s phone screen lit up on his desk. She grabbed it, only to find the strangest message there.

You will pay.

What the… She typed in his passcode, only for it to be wrong. Strange, his password had always been Helia’s birthday. Maybe she typed it wrong, but when she typed it again… It still didn’t work.

Her brows were furrowed, alright. That was very, very strange. She tried her own birthday but it didn’t work either.

Rowan came back with two steaming plastic cup of coffee, “A latte with extra sugar for you.”

She sat and grabbed the cup, but he couldn’t muster a smile. “You got a text.”

He stopped in his tracks, seating next to her. “And?”

She showed the phone screen to Rowan, “Why would someone send that to you?”

More than a thousand scenarios ran through her head, some more realistic than others. But her concern grew every second Rowan took to answer. He grabbed the phone and read it, the muscles in his jaw tensing. “Ro?”

“It’s okay,” he said, a hand on her thigh after he placed his phone on couch. “It’s nothing.”

“Nothing?” she hissed. “Someone wants to make you pay about something and you say it’s nothing?”

“Because it’s true,” he answered. “It’s just a student who is mad about his grade, alright? It happens from time to time.”

Her lips parted, “You’re joking right? A student?”

“It’s the truth.”

“And how would you know that? It came from a blocked ID.”

“I know because it happened before, it’s been delt with, alright? They are more talk than action, they always are.”

“So… All those texts you’ve reacted badly to it was them? Even when we were away?”

He sighed, his head falling back. “Yes. Yes, it was that.”

She cocked her head to the side, “Why didn’t you tell me? I worried, Rowan. You weren’t talking to me, and I know you don’t like to be pushed to talk but… I worried.”

“I’m sorry, alright?” he said, his voice coming up short. “I didn’t want to worry you. There were so many things on your mind already and as I said, this is harmless. It wasn’t worth worrying you.”

“So, I have to talk but you can keep things to yourself?”

He sighed, grabbing her hand, “I was trying to protect you. I would have told you once it was over, Aelin.”

“I just feel useless,” she admitted. “I feel useless in our relationship. You never tell me anything.”

“I know, I’m sorry,” he said, almost too easily.

“Do you promise you’ll be alright?”

He wrapped an arm around her shoulder and hugged her. “I protect you. Always. I promise.”

She nodded. That was good enough for now, she didn’t have the energy for another fight. He played with a strand of her hair, “You should pick up something to eat and go back home. Pour yourself a hot bathtub and relax, you deserve a few days off.”

She raised an eyebrow, “You allow me to skip classes?”

“I don’t care about school, I only care for your health.”

“I love you,” she breathed into his neck.

He kissed the crown of her head before whispering, “I love you, too.”

---

A week later, Aelin was still soaking daily into a hot bath. Rowan did know how to help her relax. Sometimes, he’d come back from work to find her in his bathtub, and he would join her, other times he would help her relax in other ways while she was still surrounded by water.

But today, she was alone. She had also taken another habit other than the bathtubs; she stopped going to a few classes. Not enough to stop school completely, but enough to take a step back.

Between Rowan, Helia, her infertility and the lies she kept feeding people… Aelin had needed a small, tiny break. Classes for the year were over soon, she could have waited for vacations to start and yet… She didn’t have the energy.

She took care of herself first, she was sure Yrene would be proud of that.

Helia was at her grandparents today and Rowan was a very, very busy surgeon. It was easy to forget, he was good at making time for her and Helia, but there were some days where she was painfully aware of it. And by that, she meant that she usually woke up alone and fell asleep alone. Rowan trusted her to care for Helia in those days, an honor Aelin tried to live up to.

But these days also meant that Aelin had alone time at his house, so she started spending time on herself. It wasn’t too bad, she supposed.

She was texting her friends when her father’s name appeared on her screen and her phone started ringing. “Hi, dad.”

“Aelin,” his voice seemed short. The hospital was very busy lately, and it did not only affect her boyfriend. Her father barely had time to text or call her in the last week or so. “How are you doing, darling?”

“Fine,” she said, her hand playing with pink foam over the water. “Very busy lately.” She hoped it didn’t sound as wrong as it felt. “You?”

“Mostly the same,” he answered. “Wait, aren’t you supposed to be in class at that time?”

She was, he was right. It only took her less than a second to think of a lie. She was becoming awfully good at that. “I’m at the library with Lys and Dorian. We sacrifice a few hours of classes to work a little more on the ones we struggle with the most.”

“Uh, yeah,” her father replied. “I remember doing that a few times, too. Just don’t make it a habit, alright, darling?”

She smiled, “Sure, dad.”

“Alright, listen. Would you come over tonight for dinner?”

“Tonight? That’s a little short notice.”

He chuckled, “I didn’t know a med student’s planning was so full she couldn’t see her parents anymore.”

She winced, “Yeah, sure. I’ll be there. When should I come over?”

“Around seven?”

“That’s good, see you tonight.”

They hung up and Aelin sighed, her head falling back onto the edge of the tub. Rowan had planned on cooking lasagna tonight; she really loved his lasagnas. Maybe she could tell him to leave her some leftovers.

She checked the time and sighed when she noticed she had to be at her parents in less than two hours. Shit. She stood into the bath, but it wasn’t considering how slippery a bathtub full of soap was.

Aelin lost her balance, she gripped the first thing she could hand her hands on, but it made her let her phone fall into the hot water. “Fuck!” she almost yelled, bending to retrieve her phone. She grabbed it a few seconds later, she got out of the tub and wrapped a towel around her chest. She sat on the border of the tub, pressing against the button of her phones but no matter what she did, it didn’t turn on.

“Shit! Fuck!” She hid her face in her hands, taking a few minutes to evacuate her frustration. It was alright, she had her old phone at her apartment. This PIN was dead, but she could buy a new one tomorrow.

But all of her pictures with Rowan and Helia… They were gone. For good. She shook her head, trying to put some sense into that damn mind of hers. She dressed quickly, deciding that she would get a dress her mother would accept at her apartment and took off. She still left a note in the kitchen for her boyfriend to find, and she thanked the gods she wasn’t the one planned on picking Helia up.

She still hadn’t met Lyria’s parents, and if she was honest, Aelin wasn’t in the mood to.

Going to my parents for the evening,

Save some Lasagna for me? I’ll thank you properly ;)

Love you lots! Kiss Lia goodnight for me, please. <3

Aelin.

No one was at her apartment when she opened the door. Good, she wasn’t really in the mood to talk. She’d cancel on her parents if she had any way to do just that. She put her old phone to charge as she picked up a long, black dress. Not very flattering but it wasn’t Aelin-ish enough for her mother to disapprove.

She only brushed her hair and straightened them, applying only a small amount of mascara on her eyes and blush on her cheeks. She hadn’t had a restful night, so she looked pale.

She smiled at herself in the mirror. Her old self, the one she had said goodbye to the moment she met Rowan. But this part of her… Aelin didn’t want it gone. Not entirely. This was the last bit she owned that also belonged to Celaena.

She shook her head, getting rid of the thoughts that were sure to bring tears in her eyes and she jumped into her car, driving to her parents. It would be good to spend some time with them, or at least with her father.

She drove with some mindless music in the background she sang along to, which made the drive feel a lot quicker than it was. When she parked in front of the house where she used to live it was already dark outside.

She opened the door and entered the living room, only to find her uncle Gavriel sitting on the thousand dollars couch, a glass of whiskey in his hand and his perfectly tailored suit covering his body. “Uncle,” she said, a little wary. “I thought tonight was just me and my parents.”

He stood and opened his arms for her, a kind smile lifting up his lips. “Sorry for intruding.”

She rolled her eyes and took him in her arms, “Nonsense, I love spending time with my old relatives.”

He chuckled, “You are always so nice, Niece.”

She cocked her head to the side and smiled, “I know, thank you!”

She looked around the room for her parents, but they weren’t there yet. She was glad they had invited her; it was the perfect occasion for her to do something she hadn’t yet dared to do. “I’m sorry,” she said too quickly. “For the last time we saw each other.”

He shook his head, “None of that. Things got heated on all parts, including mine. This was your fight with Aedion, I shouldn’t have taken part in it. But if I can say something; he misses you. Give him a call when you are ready.”

“Is he here?” She hoped he was. She missed him too, but pride was a tricky thing.

He shook his head and smiled sadly, “I’m afraid he is spending the night with Lysandra.”

“It’s okay,” she said. “Are they… Finally together?”

Her uncle took a deep breath, “I actually have no idea. Knowing my son, I suppose it means they aren’t.”

She snorted, “He’d be the type to brag about it everywhere.”

“I think he could call the mayor and ask him to do an announcement to the entire city,” her uncle joked along.

She laughed when the doorbell rang, “Are we expecting a new member of the family I didn’t know?”

He rolled his eyes, “Open that door, I’ll go look for your dad. I’m afraid he locked himself in his office again.”

She winked at him and went for the door, her heels clicking onto the floor. She opened the door, her breath escaping her lungs. “What are you doing here?” She hissed, closing the door behind her after she looked, making sure no one had seen.

Rowan stood in front of her, looking as tired as he was handsome. He couldn’t be here, shouldn’t be here. Her parents were right in the damn house. “I tried to call you at least twenty times,” he said, careful of the level of his voice. “I kept sending me to voicemail.”

“My phone’s dead,” she answered, almost whispering. “But what the fuck are you doing here?”

“Your father asked me to,” he hissed back. Scared. Her boyfriend looked scared. It took her by the guts, he was so levelheaded usually.

“Why?”

“You think I asked?”

“Well,” She looked around, breathing in deep to not let any fear rise in her. “Why the hell didn’t you? It’s probably the first thing I would have done.”

“If the father of my secret girlfriend who also happens to be my boss asks me to do something, I don’t ask questions. I do everything he said.” He snapped, not raising his voice. Obviously, he was anxious.

“Fuck.” She breathed, passing a hand through her hair and pulling out a few strands.

“Aelin, what is happening.” He demanded.

“Just… Just give me one second, alright.” She was going to have a panic attack. It didn’t make sense, none of what had happened in the last two hours made sense. Why wouldn’t her father tell her he invited Rowan?

“If you didn’t notice it’s kind of a pressing matter.”

She glared at him. As if she didn’t notice. She took a deep breath and said “He doesn’t know.”

“How do you know that?”

“Your face isn’t bloody, that’s what tells me that.”

“You think he would punch me?” Rowan sounded scared, as if he would run away.

“Where do you think I picked my temper from?”

“Oh, fucking Gods,” he breathed, barely loud enough for her to hear.

“Where is Lia?” Oh, Gods. What if he brought her here?

“She is having a sleepover with her grandparents. Aelin, I need you to tell me if I’m about to get punched.” Oh, so she really scared him.

“I-I don’t think you will, alright?”

“You don’t think?” He hissed.

“I’m ninety-two percent sure.” She snapped back. That was what she did under pressure, always snapping.

“Fuck.”

“My father seemed worried about how I handle my time. Maybe this is a committee to say, ‘You’re fucking up again, Aelin!’ or something along those lines. It would be very fitting of my family.” He looked at her, eyes softening. But before he could, the door behind her opened.

“Aelin?”

“Uncle Gavriel,” she breathed, trying to give him her best smile. “This is my professor, Doctor Whitethorn. Doctor, this my uncle.”

“Nice to meet you, sir.” Rowan extended a hand to her uncle who shook it and gave Rowan a nod.

“I wonder why that dear niece of mine didn’t offer you to come in, she is not usually this rude.” He joked.

“Uncle…” Was he serious?

“Please, come in, Doctor Whitethorn. My sister and brother-in-law are on their way, they are on the phone.” Gavriel opened the door wide enough for Rowan to enter the house. He’d already been there. It was where they met, after all. “We’ve seen each other already, didn’t we?”

“At a dinner, a few weeks ago,” Rowan confirmed. “But we didn’t have the occasion of being introduced to one another.”

“Right,” her uncle said. “Can I offer you anything to drink?”

“Sure,” Rowan breathed, “Whatever you’re having.”

She glared at him, trying to communicate everything she couldn’t say in words. Mainly, she just wanted him to find an excuse and get the hell out of here. It was probably the first time she didn’t throw herself on the occasion to spend time with her boyfriend. “So, Doctor, what is your specialty?”

“Neurosurgery,” Rowan didn’t lack his usual pride as he answered. “I used to be one of Doctor Galathynius’ students.”

“And one of the best,” a deep voice interrupted them from behind. Aelin turned around to find her father and mother walking into the room. She hugged her father first, then her mother. She looked her up and down, “You look pretty, darling.”

She smiled, “Thank you, mom.”

“I see you already started drinking,” her father chuckled, “I will gladly join you.”

All of them fell into a conversation, Rowan quieter than her parents and uncle but he still spoke a few times. Aelin, on the other hand, felt like a true outcast.

Only Rowan seemed to see it, throwing her glances every few seconds. She sent him secrets, barely-there smiles. Even in a room full of people who had known her for her entire life, Rowan still was the only person to truly see her.

The real her.

“Shall we eat?” Her mother asked.

“Gods,” she groaned. “I’m starving.”

“Aelin,” she hissed. “It’s not proper.”

She swallowed, “Sorry.”

Evalin shook her head and led her guests to the dining room. Her spine straightened when she felt the brushing touch of a hand down her back.

Her father was at the head of the table, with her mother on his left and uncle on his right. Aelin sat beside Gavriel, and she happened to be in front of Rowan. The first course was served, and Aelin focused on eating it like a proper lady while the adults were talking. She was feeling like a child, only here for decoration.

“Doctor Whitethorn,” her mother asked. “What do you think of Aelin’s progress in classes?”

She stopped dead at that question, and so did Rowan. She nudged him under the table with her foot. He coughed and took a sip of his water. “I think Miss Ashryver Galathynius,” thank gods he remembered to use her mother’s last name too. “Is a brilliant student. Me and her other professors only notice improvement in her knowledge, as well as curiosity to always look for more when she is taught about something.”

Her mother’s smile was proud at these words. She looked at her and send a nod this way, her own way to congratulate her, Aelin supposed.

“It’s good to hear that.” Her father answered. “Some of her professors took contact with us to voice their concern. Apparently, Aelin has been skipping quite a lot of classes lately.”

What.

The.

Fuck.

“Is it something you noticed, as well?” Her father asked, without ever looking at her way. What was he playing?

Was this entire night to humiliate her? Because she was slightly drifting away from the path that had been chosen for her?

Rowan looked at her only once, barely more than a second, before he answered, “I do not think it’s such an unusual behavior. A lot of students, by that time of the year, choose which course they need to put the most of their energy for the finals. I don’t think Miss Ashryver Galathynius’ grades have been dropping in other courses, I know they only improve in mine. So, this is not something I would spend too much time wondering about.”

She wanted to kiss him right now. If she could, she would lean over the table and press their lips together. Hell to properness.

“Thank you for your honesty, Doctor Whitethorn,” her mother answered in her diplomatic voice.

“Dad…” Aelin breathed. “I told you; I pick the courses that need my full attention. My mind is only on succeeding, ask any of my friends they would tell you.”

They would lie for her, at least. She was sure of it.

“I hear you, Aelin. It is my job as a father to worry,” he answered. “One last thing, Doctor Whitethorn.”

“Anything, chief,” Rowan answered. He looked oh-so-relaxed, even if she could hear the tension in his voice.

Rowan was as good a liar as she was. They truly were a match. She pressed her lips together to avoid smiling at the thought, her timing was all wrong.

“What I’m wondering now,” her father said, finishing his one last sip of whiskey, “Is why, in Mala’s name, you thought it was a good idea to screw my daughter?”

••••••

Listen, it HAD to happen at one point…. Right?

Sorry for the hell that is about to hit us all.

••••••

@sheharahu // @morganofthewildfire // @thestoriesyoutell // @fromthelibraryofemilyj // @swankii-art-teacher // @itsforeverinnocent-blog // @becarefuloflove // @imnotsogoodatthis // @rowaelinismyotp // @a-court-of-milkandhoney // @feysand-loml // @elentiyawhitethorn // @live-the-fangirl-life // @story-scribbler // @loves-books // @fangirlprincess09 // @theysayitscrazy // @danibutterr // @endlessdaydream // @thegreyj // @gracie-rosee // @acreativelydifferentlove // @cretaceous-therapod // @louphantomdragon // @mis-lil-red // @backtobl4ck // @whoever-you-choose-to-love // @lemonade-coolattas // @mad-madeline-ace // @the-introverted-bibliophile // @leiawritesstories // @emilyoftheshadows // @anniesbookshelf // @rainbowcheetah512 // @astra-ad-mare // @story-scribbler // @superspiritfestival // @wordsafterhours // @rowaelinrambling // @black-daisy-water // @fireheart-violet // @livsdriverslicense // @charlizeed // @ladykreads // @mariamuses // @autumnbabylon // @justreadertings

[frankiefellinlove]

1977-12-31, CAPITOL THEATRE, PASSAIC, NJ

Photos by Micheal Putland, though I’m not sure of the last two pics!

Bruce & The E Street Band perform on stage with Southside Johnny & The Asbury Jukes.

STORY AS WRITTEN IN HIS BLOG BY ‘MUSIC CITY MIKE’:

“Promoter John Scher welcomed everyone to the theatre with the greeting of “It’s New Year’s in New Jersey.” Southside Johnny and the Asbury Jukes were the New Year’s Eve headliners at the Capitol. Riding high on the success of their first two records, the band was moving from the clubs to the small theater, and this night was their biggest show to date. The Jukes were joined this evening by their founding member, producer and song contributor, Miami (he wasn’t called “Little” yet) Steve van Zandt on guitar and backing vocals. His special presence added the extra treat of him doing the Sam and Dave thing with Johnny on duets of “Broken Down Piece of Man” and “You Don’t Know Like I Know.

The Juke’s set was on the money, and of course, whenever they played there was always the possibility of a Springsteen appearance. While it didn’t always happen, this night it did and in spades! Of all of the concerts I have been to, this certainly was the biggest musical surprise I have ever witnessed.

Another Asbury Park band, The Shakes opened the night, and The Jukes timed their set to start around 11:15pm. After a few songs, it was the midnight hour and surprise, surprise, a “loose” Bruce joined them in singing the Juke’s trademark show-stopper, Sam Cooke’s “Having a Party” right after the Miami Horns played the requisite “Auld Lang Syne.” Rockabilly singer, Robert Gordon, who was currently being embraced by the punk community, also joined in on the fun during “Stagger Lee” as did a steady flow of E Street Band members throughout the show.

Bruce stayed on for the rest of the set singing a little, but mostly just playing some added guitar. But, he really started letting go when he and Johnny set out to end the night trading vocals on an exhilarating version of Jackie Wilson’s “Higher and Higher.” The audience then started to head out the doors into the cold New Jersey night. I myself was in the lobby when I heard things starting up again. Bruce wanted to play some more, and everyone quickly rushed back inside to their seats.

Bruce and the E Street Band had not played together for over 9 months, and the Boss was just itching to perform. “I’m drunk and silly as a fool” said the man before kicking things off with covers of “Little Latin Lupe Lu” and “You Can’t Sit Down” during which he and the entire E Street Band were joined by several Jukes.

WNEW-FM was broadcasting the show live on the radio. Station DJ and Springsteen friend, Richard Neer was producing and MC-ing the event on the air and thought he’d just keep the tape rolling for a loose Bruce and the boys. But, Bruce was looking to just have some fun, and probably would rather not see a bootleg recording of this last-minute sloppy reunion. He gave word to kill the broadcast after the first two numbers, and it was then time for he and his band to get down to some serious business.

The surprise 45-minutes of Springsteen continued with “Backstreets,” “Born to Run” and came to a close with a cover of Gary U.S. Bonds’ “Quarter to Three.” “Backstreets” was a long extended version that included its first ever wrap with the lyrical improvisation that would eventually become the song “Drive All Night.” Maybe the E Streeters were a little sloppy, but this still was the best time I have ever had at 2am in the morning in Passaic.”

—Barry Kok

[kaistarus]

Mistexting Mayhem

Pairing: Nishinoya X Reader

Words: 1.6K

Summary: You accidentally send Nishinoya a text that was meant for Yachi and now he’s knows secrets you were hoping he never found out

A/N: If you think this fic is anything but crack you’re wrong lmao I’ve always wanted to write a fic with this style and Noya is great for the chaos i needed. It was fun

Masterlist

[6:40pm] idiot⚡: look y/n without adhd id be too powerful

                         i could beet god himself in handtohand combat

                         god was afraid of my raw fuckin awesomeness wen i bursted from the woom

[6:41pm] y/n: there is so much wrong with what u just said

[6:41pm] idiot⚡: i have absoltly no clue wat

[6:43pm] y/n: put those 3 brain cells to work. I believe in you

[6:43pm] idiot⚡: but theyve reached their daily quota

                          plz there so tired and overworked

You snorted, a dopey smile on your lips as you laid surrounded by textbooks and homework, swinging your feet in the air behind you. You focused intently on the cell phone in your hand doing everything you could to procrastinate the schoolwork around you.

[6:44pm] y/n: noyas so stupid

[6:44pm] yachi❤: i thought you liked him?

[6:45pm] y/n: jeez Yachi. dont come for my throat

                       i cant help that i have bad taste 🙄

[6:46pm] yachi❤: if it helps he tripped over a stray ball today

                               maybe think of that till you don’t like him??

Unfortunately, the image of Nishinoya waving to everyone then biffing it only had you smiling like a dork. How you’d gotten to a point that Nishinoya being an idiot made you swoon, you’ll never know.

You raised your eyebrow suspiciously at the new notification on Snapchat from ‘Tanaka’ and after swiping it open you nearly dropped your phone. Looking back at you was Nishinoya, his head tilted and eyebrow quirked in confusion with a gari-gari kun shoved halfway down his throat. The caption at the bottom reading ‘daaaammn look at your prince charming go 😩’.

You frowned at the picture, letting out a frustrated groan at how your heart accelerated against your ribcage. You quickly tapped out of it and reopened the messenger app.

[6:57pm] y/n: we have to kill Noya

[6:57pm] idiot⚡: we??? what kind of mission is this??? 😤

[6:58pm] y/n: i like him too much. he has to die. its for my own good

You waited impatiently for her response and almost debated doing your homework since it took longer than you felt necessary. You supposed you had suggested murder to Yachi, but still…

When you finally received a response your entire body froze.

[7:11pm] idiot⚡: U LIKE ME?!?!? 😍

                          UR KILLING ME?!?! 😢

                          IM SO CONFUSED......

                          and a lil turned on ngl👀

Your hand covered your mouth in horror as you processed what the hell you had just done. This didn’t happen to people in real life. Mistexting was stuff people made up when they created fake texts for social media to get likes. You didn’t think people actually went through this.

You opened new notifications to escape the hell that stared you straight in the face.

[7:15pm] Tanaka💪: Yo, whatd u do. Whys Noya having a panic attak

[7:16pm] y/n: I accidently texted him instead of Yachi and told him i liked him 😣

[7:16pm] Tanaka💪: O wtf thats hilarious 😂

[7:17pm] y/n: ITS NOT HILArIOUS

[7:18pm] Tanaka💪: Hes askin if its a prank. Wat do i do?

[7:19pm] y/n:I DONT KNOW SDKFHJN IM THE IDIOT WHO STSRTED IT

He stopped responding and you banged your head against your pillow anxiously.

[7:23pm] y/n: YACHI ITOLD NoYA I LKED HIM AND NOU HE NOS WAY DO JI DO!?!????! 😭😭😭

[7:23pm] idiot⚡: THIS ISNT YACHI!!!!

                           HOLY FUKC U DO LIEK ME!!!

You screamed into your pillow. Were you fucking kidding? This could not be happening.

[7:25pm] Tanaka💪: dude, twice? i cant save u now 🤪

[7:25pm] y/n: betraying me in my time of fucking need? i’ll remember this asshole

[7:26pm] Tanaka💪: so vulgar 👀

You growled at Tanaka’s uselessness and bravely peeked through one eye as you went back to your conversation with Nishinoya.

[7:24pm] idiot⚡: STOP IGNORING ME I KNO UR TEXTING RYU

[7:26pm] idiot: IM GONNA KEEP SPAMMING U TILL U ANSWE RME😤

[7:26pm] idiot⚡: 1

                          2

                          3

                          4

                          5

                           6

                           7

                           8

                           9

[7:27pm] y/n: what is this twitch chat? fuck 

[7:28pm] idiot⚡: your heeeeererererreee 🥰

[7:29pm] y/n: soooooo………..

                        clearly there has been a misunderstanding

[7:29pm] idiot⚡: oh nonono. I understand PERFETCLY. u LOVE me

                         its ok. this is a safe space. we can discuss feelings 😌

[7:31pm] y/n: there are zero feelings to discuss

[7:31pm] idiot⚡: then y did u say u like me too much so i have to die?

[7:34pm] y/n: i am filled with rage 🤬

[7:34pm] idiot⚡: rage over how much u liiike me???🥰🥰🥰

[7:36pm] y/n: definitely not

You racked your brain for some kind of reasonable sounding excuse, eventually landing on:

[7:36pm] y/n: It was autocorrect

[7:36pm] idiot⚡: HAH????? FROM?????

[7:38pm] y/n: HAH???

                       ....Nora?

[7:38pm] idiot⚡: Who TF is nora???? 😡

[7:39pm] y/n: someoe i like obviously 😏

[7:40pm] idiot⚡: so u like them but u use my name so much it autocorrected to me? 🤔

[7:44pm] y/n: OK MR DETEcTIVE WHERE TF ARE THES BRAIN CELS COMIN GFROM?

[7:45pm] idiot⚡: i pull them out for special ocasions 😌

[7:45pm] y/n: well how bout you pack those up and put em away

[7:46pm] idiot⚡: how bout two people who LIKE each other SAY something so they can DOOOOOOOO something bout IT 🙄

You began typing a frantic message about how it was none of his business until you processed the message. Then you read it over several times before letting out an audible, “what the fuck.”

[7:50pm] y/n: YOU LIKE ME

[7:50pm] idiot⚡: I FLIRT WITH U ALL THE TIME WAT DO U MEAN yOu LiKe Me!?!

                          FUCKING OBVIOSLY

[7:51pm] y/n: literally when. name one time.

[7:52pm] idiot⚡: I WALK WITH U EVERY MORNING!!!

[7:53pm] y/n: I thought that was a coincidence???

[7:54pm] idiot⚡: I BRNIG U SNACKS DURING LUNCH!!!

[7:54pm] y/n: I thought they were leftovers??

[7:55pm] idiot⚡: …....I call you cute and invite you to my games.

[7:56pm] y/n: you call everyone attractive and i thought there was like a audience quota or something........?

[7:57pm] idiot⚡: ….i cant tell who i should be upset with rn but i think its u 😑

[7:58pm] y/n: WAT WHY!?!

[8:00pm] Idiot⚡: I LIKE U+U LIKE ME=WE LIKE EACH OTHER

[8:01pm] y/n: whoa. slow down. I hate math 😣

[8:02pm] Idiot⚡: ===WE SHUD GO ON A DATE!!!

[8:02pm] y/n: HAH!? i think you started multiplying that addition problem buddy 🤨

Your cheeks were beginning to ache from how wide your dopey grin was. You couldn’t help but tease Nishinoya-it was second nature at this point-even if you now knew your feelings were mutual.

[8:04pm] idiot⚡: i suk at math but thats NOT the point

                         point iiissss i think deep down u want to hang out and cuddle and fall in love

                        maybe even..... 😏 kiiisssss

[8:04pm] y/n: WHOA WHOA WHOA

                        WARN ME BEFORE YOU GET NSFW

                        i would never premarital eye-contact. let alone k🤢ki-🤢🤢kiss🤢🤮🤮

[8:05pm] idiot⚡: well we would have socks on 🙄

[8:06pm] y/n: oh. well if there’s protection

[8:06pm] idiot⚡: Im not a maniac

[8:07pm] y/n: i suppose as long as you dont do something stoopid

                        like faceplant in public

                        that would be humiliating

[8:08pm] idiot⚡: I-

                          who told you that 😠

[8:08pm] y/n: i have spies everywhere noya

                        youre never safe

[8:09pm] Idiot⚡: kinda hot 👀

                         makin me fear for my life like that👀

[8:10pm] y/n: i hate that i like you

                        It kills me inside 

                        i feel braincels leaving with every conversation

[8:12pm] Idiot⚡: fan behavior 😏

                          so am i taking u to eat tomorow or wat?

[8:14pm] y/n: if I HAVE to 🙄

[8:14pm] Idiot⚡: No u GET to

                          I am a fucking delite 😤

[8:15pm] y/n: whatever helps you sleep at night

[8:15pm] Idiot⚡: nothing helps me sleep at night. this mind never rests

[8:16pm] y/n: thinking 24/7 and still not a smart thing comes out of that mouth 👀

[8:17pm] Idiot⚡: yas, bully me more 😫

[8:19pm] y/n: ok thats as much as i can handle for one day......

                       im gonna pretend to do homework

[8:20pm] idiot⚡: okie... good luck my sweet baby pogchamp 🥰

[8:20pm] y/n: no

[8:20pm] Idiot⚡: 😘😘😘

[8:22pm] y/n: 🙄✋

[8:23pm] Idiot⚡: oh FUCK yas 🥵 shut me UP

[8:25pm] y/n: suddenly all i feel is endless regret

[8:26pm] Idiot⚡: i have that effect on people

                          See you tomorrow 🥰🥰🥰

[8:27pm] y/n: unfortunately 😘

[8:27pm] idiot⚡: 🥵

You flung an arm over your eyes and let a small giggle bubble up from your chest. Nishinoya was probably the biggest idiot you’d ever met, but you couldn’t help that thinking of spending time with him had you kicking your feet with excitement.

You supposed you should actually get started on your homework. You reached forward when a notification popped up from Yachi, asking if her idea worked and you had stopped liking Nishinoya.

...you should probably break the news, huh?

[marsbutterfly]

Skyfall

Summary: When you are hired to kill the most dangerous mafia boss, things get a little complicated.

Wattpad Version! | AO3 Version!

|◁ II ▷|

“This is the end

Hold your breath and count to ten

Feel the Earth move and then

Hear my heart burst again”

7:34pm

The clock on your wrist tics quietly but in the silent room, it nearly sounds like bombs being dropped from above. Not a word is exchanged between you and the man sitting across the room but you know exactly what he wants.

In his hand rests a dark colored suitcase, you can barely tell until the light hits his belt ever so gently but you finally see the gun he’s been carrying.

You take a deep breath, getting up for your seat. The sound of your heels clicking on the floor fills the atmosphere as you walk towards him, the smirk on his lips is undeniable and you don’t understand what he has to be smiling about.

He stands up a second after you and walks in your direction, bumping against you and dropping his suitcase and the papers in his hand. In response, you throw on the floor the suitcase you once held. 

The man apologizes profoundly as you help him collect the papers on the floor. You say over and over that it is ok, while all the curious eyes in the room land on you. As you stand up, you hand him the suitcase you once had in your hand and he nods, thanking you for the help and apologizing one last time.

You begin to make your way back to your car, the smirk on his lips still engraved in your brain as a chill travels down your spine. “Why was he smiling?” You ask yourself not wanting to admit it but you are a bit scared of knowing the answer.

Though once you open the suitcase, you understand why. Inside, rests the pictures and information of your next target, the millionaire leader of an enemy gang. Though you don’t enjoy taking sides, you’ve been paid a large amount of money to take her out, more than you have ever made.

The war between these two gangs has been going on for the longest time and you have killed enough people on both sides to earn a fair amount of enemies, but this time you couldn’t help but feel a sinking hole opening in your heart.

Hanji Zoe has always been the deadliest member of the underground group. Her kill count is even higher than yours, at least 500+ heads under her belt. They say her torture methods surpass even the ones they use in hell.

She’s known as the Devil herself.

“For this is the end

I've drowned and dreamt this moment

So overdue, I owe them

Swept away, I'm stolen”

8:15pm

Your keys unlock the heavy doors of your house and somehow the marble floors feel colder than ever. Your shoes rest in their designated spot by the coat holder and you throw the suitcase on the couch.

Two cups rest on the counter near the bar area inside your home. One of them contains what you assume is whisky, due to the color and the amount of ice in the cup, it has always been her favorite after a work day.

The lipstick marks are fresh meaning she has just now gotten home. Upon paying closer attention, you realize the shower is on and steam is coming out of the bathroom. You think about joining her but ultimately decide to have a drink first, trying to forget about your next target.

Gently, you take two rocks of ice and place them in the clean cup specifically placed out for you. Pouring yourself a single shot of whisky, you walk towards the balcony feeling as the cold air of the night hits your face.

You knew this day would come but you hoped it would take longer. 

Deep in your own thoughts, you don’t realize the water has been turned off in the bathroom and wet footsteps approach your body.

It’s not until her wet arms wrap around your black dress that you realize you are no longer alone. Her face is buried in your back and you can see steam leaving her arms as the hair on her skin stands up.

The tattoo of your initials on her hand still brings butterflies to your stomach. The memory of the night she got it is still one of your favorite moments you spent together, especially since it was after your first date and she told you she knew you were the one.

“I missed you.” She says, placing a kiss on your skin. You can feel as her breasts are pressed against you and a gasp leaves your body.

“I missed you too.” You reply, a disobedient tear rolling down your face as you chug the contents of the cup in your hand.

“What’s wrong?” She asks, placing her hand on your waist as she turns your body around so you can face her. She is a few inches taller, nothing too extreme but enough to make you look up at her gently.

Her thumb brushes the tear on your cheek before rubbing it above your lips. You take a deep breath, gathering the courage to tell her the news you just received.

“You are my next target.” You say and Hanji nods, a sad smirk on her lips.

“Let the sky fall

When it crumbles

We will stand tall

Face it all together” 

9:00pm

The brush goes through her hair with ease for the first time, as if she took care of the tangles in the shower already knowing what the news you were bringing would be. After shower moments were the ones where Hanji was the most vulnerable.

She would simply close her eyes and appreciate the attention she’s been given as she fades in the echo of your voice. You hum a melody quietly, Hanji’s favorite song in the hopes to bring her any comfort at all.

Your tears drip down your nose onto her scalp as you put her hair in a ponytail, attempting to help her get ready for the party she will be attending in an hour. At the highest floor of the second tallest building in the entire city.

“How are you going to do it?” She asks, lighting a cigarette and blowing the smoke up in the air while trying to make rings out of it. You giggle, touching her shoulders before sliding your hands down her arms.

You notice the goosebumps rising on her skin and can’t help but smile at how she reacts to your touch. “Must we talk about it?”

“I need to know.” She replies and you nod, sighing heavily while finally agreeing to talk about the elephant in the room.

“I’ll be on the roof of the Paradise building. I am pretty sure they will send someone to watch me do it.” You begin, spraying the bottle of perfume around her and noticing as the drops of liquid fall on her tan skin, masking the smell of the cigarette.

“But they might not.” She says and you shrug your shoulders.

“They might not.” You say quietly.

“I wouldn’t expect any less from this city’s top 1 assassin.” She says, taking your hand in hers and planting a soft kiss on your palm, leaving behind the red mark of her deep colored lipstick.

She stands up, allowing the robe to fall to the floor and reveal her naked body. You can’t look away from the perfect shape of her breasts, the line that goes through her abdomen from a previous surgery and all of her battle scars.

“Make me yours one last time.” You say, pulling your shirt above her head as you expose yourself to her and she nods, a devious smile curling up on her lips.

You see a few old bullet wounds, some healed while others are still healing. Every single one of them tells a story about who she is and how she has lived her life but your favorite story has always been the one of how she lost her eye.

It was three years ago, the day you met. How could you ever forget?

“Let the sky fall

When it crumbles

We will stand tall

Face it all together

At Skyfall”

Since you were a teenager, you’ve been good at killing. First your shitty parents and every family member who sided with them, including your own brother and sister. Finally being able to control your life, you decided to make a living out of it.

This career put you through college where you earned a chemistry degree, learning how to mix your personal kinds of poison, some of which no one has ever even heard of which makes it hard for the police to find who was responsible for it.

At first, you would go for basic targets: rapists, animal abusers, anyone who dared hurt another soul but word got out of how excellent and quick you were at your job and your number of clients tripled and your name was in everyone’s mouth.

One day, you got a call from a blocked russian number. A smile creeped on your lips as you heard a familiar voice over the phone, Erwin Smith. The man who gave you a chance to grow in this life and made you who you are today, your mentor.

“Y/N, I’m dying.” He says, his voice is faint and you notice his life force is fading away. 

“I can tell.” You reply trying to lighten the mood and he laughs.

“Will you still work for the next boss?” He asks, coughing out a liquid which you could only assume was blood. 

“If that is your dying wish.” You respond and he hums in agreement over the phone, “Then yes.”

Later that week, two men showed up to your house to escort you to Erwin’s funeral. The rain poured over his coffin, hiding away the tears of those who loved him.

Surrounded by at least five men sat a woman in a black coat, her eyes looking in your direction as she took the cigarette to her lips. The tattoos on her leg on display for anyone to see, you could’ve sworn she was silently flirting with you.

And in a moment of weakness, a car drove by shooting up the place completely. Of course they were received with a buffet of bullets as well, but nearly a third of the people around the casket were now dead.

As a bullet makes its way towards you, the brunette with danger in her eyes rushes forward to protect you only to receive the bullet with a glass platter. Needless to say, an uncountable amount of shards found their way into her eyeball.

While she bled in your arms, you tried to make sure she remained awake.

“What’s your name?” You ask and she smiles, bringing your hand towards her lips and licking your thumb with a palpable sexual energy.

“Hanji. Hanji Zoe.” She replied, “The new boss.”

“Skyfall is where we start

A thousand miles and poles apart

Where worlds collide and days are dark

You may have my number, you can take my name

But you'll never have my heart”

10:05pm

Once you are finished redoing Hanji’s hair, she stares at the closet before finally picking out a blood colored suit. No shirt underneath, she places the blazer right above her nipples, only enough to cover them while allowing the rest of her breasts to be exposed.

You on the other hand plan to dress yourself in a completely black outfit hoping to blend into the darkness of the night. Luck was on your side for there were no stars to brighten the sky, allowing you to take complete cover.

As far as you know, nobody is aware of your relationship with Hanji, not even her subordinates. Keeping business away from your private life has always been a priority, even before you committed your first paid killing.

She places a final kiss on your hands and one of your lips, though it does not feel like a goodbye and you sadly accept any kind of comfort you can find.

When her car is out of view, you decide to go up and take a shower by yourself. You wanted to decline this job, to throw everything away: your reputation, the money and simply run away with Hanji to a place where you could live your lives.

But you can’t. Before even knowing who your targets are, you are always made to sign a consent form and if broken, it would cost you your life.

The warm water hits your face and you can still smell Hanji’s strawberry shampoo in the air mixed with the fading smoke of her cigarettes. You begin to remember every shower you spent together, every kiss you shared at the most exquisite places around the world.

Hanji always knew how to make you feel like the luckiest girl in the world. Eventually, you can no longer if the water streaming down your face comes from the shower or your tears.

As you finish your shower, you begin to get ready. The black outfit had never been colder and the unsettling feeling at the pit of your stomach still remains. While putting a mask above your face, you look at your rifle.

It has your initials and Hanji’s secretly carved on the side and on the other it has the date you started dating. A good luck charm, as she liked to call it.

Tonight will be a fucking awful night.

“Let the sky fall (let the sky fall)

When it crumbles (when it crumbles)

We will stand tall (we will stand tall)

Face it all together

At Skyfall”

1:53am

Hours have passed since you've been sitting at the top of this building by yourself, looking through the binoculars at the party happening not too far away.  In the end, they decided not to send anyone to watch over your shoulder as you do your job.

The richest and most powerful people in town were all attending and, even though they wore masks, you could still tell exactly who they were. The years of analyzing and recognizing targets from afar has given you the extraordinary ability to identify covered faces.

By the bar, you see her as she rests her arm on the glass top. She looks beautiful. Her whiskey brown eyes match the liquid in her cup as the black mask covers her features. For a second, you could’ve sworn she looked directly at you.

The instructions were clear: at 2am, a single bullet should be shot directly to her head, killing her instantly. So you position your gun, looking through the lense as Hanji disappears in the crowd for a bit before returning to her usual spot.

You sigh, stopping the tears that attempt to cloud your vision. Your finger slowly moves towards the trigger, as if time itself is desperately trying to stop you from killing your loved one, but it doesn’t matter. No one could stop you now.

Counting the seconds, you make sure the shot to her head is clear and you pray she won’t suffer at all. “Goodbye, my love.”

Time nearly stops once you pull the trigger. You watch closely as the bullet goes through her brain and blood splatters across the clear counter causing every person in the room to desperately run for their lives, not knowing they are all safe.

Only one man stands in the room and he raises his glass at you for he is the only one who knows no more shots will be fired. The asshole who hired you to kill the love of your life. Fucking Zeke Yeager.

With every ounce of your body, you decide that killing him isn’t worth it. He deserves to live to suffer in the future.

You bring your body back up, beginning to disassemble your rifle. It takes you less than a minute to be on your way and you can hear as police sirens approach the building in front of you.

“Where you go, I go

What you see, I see

I know I'd never be me

Without the security

Of your loving arms

Keeping me from harm

Put your hand in my hand

And we'll stand”

Finally getting back to your house, you throw the bag containing the gun on the couch before plopping your body right beside it, a long sigh escaping your lips.

Your eyes then notice the packed bags, all ready to leave as soon as possible. The clicking of heels comes from the other side of the house and you smirk, rushing your thumb through your lips.

“I feel bad for the lady you hired to die in your place.” You say, turning around and propping your chin on the back of the couch.

“Would you prefer if I had died in her place?” Hanji asks, rushing her hand through her freshly shaved head in an attempt to get rid of any hairs that still remain attached to her.

“Of course not, love.” You reply, walking towards her before taking the glass of wine from her free hand.

“Hanji Zoe is dead and the witness to it is Zeke Yeager himself.” She says, a devious smile on her lips.

You can’t help but link your mouth with hers, tasting the delightful mixture of alcohols she has had tonight. Her hands travel through your body, exploring every inch of your skin before gently brushing against your inner thigh.

You gasp gently, nearly melting in response to her actions. God knows you want to melt but you don’t have time.

“It’s 4:25am, the plane leaves in 35 minutes so we should go.” She says and you nod.

You grab one of the packed bags plus your rifle and she grabs the rest before extending her hand to you, hoping to walk away from this life with you by her side but not before staging your own kidnapping and death, everything so no one would ever look for either of you.

Once done with arrangements, she smiles. 

“So where are we going to make our new home?” You ask.

“My home is wherever you are.” She replies and you feel your cheeks getting warm before she continues, “But I was planning the Carribeans.” 

“Fuck yes.” Is all you say and she laughs, squeezing your hand as you both say goodbye to the apartment you’ve shared for years. Leaving behind a life of danger to live together in the house of your dreams, far away from all the negativity.

Just you and Hanji. And maybe a few cats and dogs along the way.

“Let the sky fall (let the sky fall)

When it crumbles (when it crumbles)

We will stand tall (we will stand tall)

Face it all together

At Skyfall”