#who only do it bc it looks intelligent
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
moe-broey · 2 months ago
Text
Tumblr media
Some. Sort of spectrum. From most likely to least likely.
And by kitten-pile I mean This
Tumblr media
I'll put a transcript under cut for easier reading! 🫡
How Likely Are They to Kitten Pile?
__
Mirabilis: "are you tired..? do you need a break...? ohh we could take one together..."
If she likes/trusts you even a little, she wants to cuddle about it!!!
-
Sharena and Peony: "Okay! 💖 Yay! 💖"
Shari: The only thing stopping her is social conventions -- making her MORE likely to jump at the opportunity!
Peony: Learning social awareness as she goes, and is surprisingly good at it?
-
Triandra: "Aren't we a bit old for that...? But... even so..."
Embarrassed, conflicted, but feels strangely nostalgic at the notion...
-
Plumeria: "I'm not so petal-soft that I'd resort to such INDECENCY, I mean even if your intentions are Pure USE YOUR HEADS YOU FOOLS!! Girl, the IMPLICATIONS!!!"
Desperately wants to join the kitten-pile, but her Issues and Pride gets in the way.
-
Moe: "aw, so cutes!"
Generally touch adverse, extremely picky even with the people it likes/loves -- everything is entirely on its terms.
#fire emblem#feh#STILL. DRAFTING. IT FEELS LIKE. concetualizing. ect.#but this vision was So Strong. and is honestly Such a way to parse each out.#like... mira craves warmth and comfort... i think she esp likes cuddling w peony bc it feels like a mother's touch#esp the discrepancy in body types i'm going w here. i really wanna draw them together actually...#meanwhile LONG. LONG STANDING HC. about sharena being v physically affectionate even touch starved#and having to learn boundaries the hard way. i also think a huge difference between her and peony actually#is that peony always had someone to cuddle with (mira!!). so peony never had to 'outgrow' it the way shari had to#which may have led to peony being a little more adjusted actually??? i also am v much playing w the idea#that peony is like min maxed. she's surprisingly socially aware/emotionally intelligent#BUT. she still has huge blind spots due to her seclusion and mostly only interacting w kid mortals (in the dream realm)#and i esp think she fails to see the complexity in situations. ect ect#triandra. boy do i have lore about triandra. but you can take a guess. i'll leave that up to you.#AND PLUMERIA. OH MY GOD PLUMERIA. i can just TELL she's going to be an EXTREMELY FUN chara to write#she basically writes herself. looking deeper beyond the obvious sex repulsion/intimacy issues#she's a stubborn jaded 'too cool for this' older sister. who is WAY more protective than she will Ever Admit.#LIKE... I AM THINKING ESP HOW SHE TREATED MIRA IN THAT TT SIDE STORY.#the way she was looking out for her. tri is absolutely plum's most trusted confidant and therefore#the person she's most vulnerable with. but even then. she's still protective of mira and i bet even peony if she had trouble#(granting. they're on the same side). AUGH AND ALSO THE WAY PLUM IS STUCK IN HER WAYS TOO....#I DON'T HAVE COHERENT THOUGHTS. but the way plumeria Is just resonates so deeply w me...#mirabilis#sharena#fe peony#fe triandra#fe plumeria#moe tag#summoner oc#my art
12 notes · View notes
gothsuguru · 8 months ago
Text
let it be known…. bestie!sukuna does a killer winged eyeliner
#sharp enough to cut a man and that’s his goal i just know he does the meanest winged eyeliner for you in class#you hand him the pen w/o saying a word and he’s immediately grabbing the back of your head to steady you#if suguru sees that he’s like What Thw Fuck Is going onnimm gonna be Sick#firmly believe that reader & everyone in school has a mini crush on sukuna#i say mini bc he is so fucking sexy but the moment he opens his mouth you’re like damn… i regret all my life choices why’s he yelling at me#anyways. reader is the only one who can tolerate sukuna and vice versa <3 reader is friendly so everyone loves them#but like. BEST FRIEND wise? it’s sukie & reader til death does them part 🤞🏼🤞🏼🤞🏼 i love them so much idk why their dynamic makes me so happy#okay i’m just talking to myself in the tags rn hmmm how do i want him to look#pink hair + black undercut OBVIOUSLY. face tatts/body tatts OBVIOUSLY.#ear piercings + helix + industrials + eyebrow piercing + nose piercing + snake bites + tongue piercing OBVIOUSLY#he’d also wear reading glasses. FKN nerd 😹😹😹 i have 20/20 vision i can’t relate 🤭🤭🤭#immaculately dressed & insanely intelligent you can call sukuna a lot of things but you can’t call him ugly or dumb#i think he’d have reader’s birth flower tattooed on him too just as a nod to how much he loves/cares for them <3#where should he work… maybe at the same tattoo shop as suguru? yeah maybe that could work#sukie’ll be a piercer while sugu is a tattooist yeah that checks out#maybe they’re in the same frat? yeah that could work part 2#okay YAY cool i’m glad i’m fleshing him out :3#snippets#personal
9 notes · View notes
isekyaaa · 6 months ago
Text
One story that'd be really fun to write out would be from a person that is isekai'd into the world of a dating sim as the heroine. They're one of those evil heroines that want all the male routes to fall in love with them. They even have that innate charm magic or they use methods like laced cookies to make the men fall in love with them. However, much to their dismay, there's this character that always foils them. He's the secret route that the heroine never took interest in. He passed out wards against charm magic. He finds antidotes to love potions. No matter what the heroine tries, he keeps foiling each and every single one of their plans. The heroine hates him but he finds the heroine and their tactics absolutely fascinating. They keep going at it until one day the heroine realizes with horror that they may have fallen in love with him.
#story ideas#i've already done some planning for this#in my idea (as if this isn't already my idea) everyone in the world has a special skill#some skills are more unique than others#despite all of that the heroine who comes from this high class noble family is given 'appraisal' which is the most basic of basic abilities#what the heroine eventually realizes though is that they have a special form of appraisal called 'organic appraisal'#meaning they get more information analyzing organic materials#from this they choose to excel in potion making (which is also a very basic skill that people look down on bc anyone can do it)#by use of their organic appraisal they can use ingredients in very specific ways to create very specific effects#they basically revolutionized potion making revealing it to be a very in depth topic#anyway tho the male lead's ability is 'perfect copy' meaning he can copy anything he's seen perfectly#from observing the heroine brew and hearing her explanation on how they brew he learned how to make an antidote to their potions#the male lead honestly doesn't care the heroine wants everyone to fall in love with them#he finds them to be very intelligent and interesting. he wants to keep them close#the heroine is looked down upon by their family for not being outstanding so they want to show it to everyone that they're worth something#hence why they want to be loved#but that pesky male lead keeps getting in the way of their goals simply for research purposes#but at the same time he's the only one that's ever showed interest in them and their research and hobbies#he's the only one that has pointed out how game changing and amazing they are even if he's a jerk about it#s-so maybe he's not that bad.... >///> (so they think)
2 notes · View notes
noxtivagus · 2 years ago
Text
I LOVE LITERATURE SO MUCH. MY FAV COURSE FR
#🌙.rambles#ARGHHH TODAY WAS SO GOOD#w biology w the. oh my god i missed lab so much 🥺#i was just so curious n interested the whole time n it made me so so happy looking n managing stuff yk n#i'm rlly a fast learner 😭 i ended up helping some classmates w their own yk#literature tho i was so happy oh my god i was the only one who liked the 3rd short story the most#MARK ON THE WALL BY VIRGINIA WOOLF !!!! 🤍#ms. was talking abt how out of the three it's the most. complex? idk but a lot of ppl didn't understand it as well i think#MY CLASSMATES CLAPPED WHEN I STOOD UP BCS#for each story ms asked us all to stand up for which is your fav n so with mark on the wall i was uh. the only one#hflsfksjfs n then the last question before ending class.. smth w element of plot n what does it mean to be human#i was fucking restless in my seat but i'm so shy so my hand was shaking but#at the end i finally got the courage to recite 🥺 IM SO HAPPY IM SO PROUD OF MYSELF#n then today i think i actually felt for once that i'm part of my class bcs i'm usually so shy#back to that question tho. this is my fucking expertise#made me rlly realize i am such an empath :^) i won't deny my intelligence i love it actually#i think. a Lot. i do consider myself to be decently self-aware. i know myself well#i can. understand others more personally too yk? oh my god i'm rlly glad w what i recited in class hehe#i cld've said sm more but hflsjgksjfs >< i'm happy w how i presented myself#honestly when i'm not nervous or anxious i really thrive. i'd be a really good friend n lover maybe n. speaking comes naturally#when i'm not nervous 💀 n when i'm passionate abt smth bcs i cld speak on the spot n have a coherent yk lil impromptu recitation or speech#n do well <3 i rlly mean it when anxiety just fucks me up bcs i'm confident in my own self#in the car rn n earlier dad brought up the concert n said he was actually rather interested in going#yh he knows their genre n all 🥺 n uhm. of how lyrics aren't very 'wholesome' as he said T_T#OFC.... MY DAD LOVES MUSIC YK HFLSKFJS#he's interested in accompanying us bcs we need an adult but he. has work so :c#we'll buy the tix later i think but mom said like condition no tailor for our prom dress this year#YEAH NP FUCK LOOKING PRETTY. MUSIC IS BETTER.#maybe tailor w grad ball or wtvr next year >.> honestly i'm just all in for the experience.#i don't care much for looking pretty or having a date for just shows n looks n confidence. i care more for the experience as a whole
5 notes · View notes
bellamygate · 2 years ago
Text
what's that post that's like you're 16 and all ur opinions, experiences, smarts etc r being filtered thru the condition that is: being 16
2 notes · View notes
tiredassmage · 2 years ago
Photo
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Savosta signing off all further mental communications with his shitty ex-boss of an Emperor, “With all disrespect / Disrespectfully, Wrath”
He’s so over this shit, your honor. He never asked for this. And he wasn’t ever paid enough to make up for it.
3 notes · View notes
sleepysick · 5 months ago
Text
()()()()()()()()
0 notes
eorzeashan · 2 years ago
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Torian: I overheard your friend Lana. We're not animals, not predators. We're warriors.
Eight: Whatever it is you are...it can't be satisfied without blood. We both know that.
Ah...this line hits different now, knowing Eight is most likely talking about himself here. He is also a warrior, but more than that, he was a predator. That blood doesn't just wash off. Killing is just killing. He can't be like Torian, who has a code to justify it with. Yet another moment where Lana chooses her words poorly, but few understand what either of them are in their positions, least of all a Sith of her pragmatic caliber.
Tumblr media
I like how Theron greeted him as if he were a stray cat returning home for dinner. "Welcome home." He gets he doesn't mean it, but it's endearing nonetheless.
Eight from Theron's pov:
Tumblr media
[Stare silently.]
Tumblr media
Anyways, here we have a very pretty angle concerning his lips. Whew.
I tried taking his veil off for the Gemini Deception chapter, and I've decided to keep it on for the rest of KOTFE/ET because it didn't feel right; I think I associate his default look with the class story too much and there's something about concealing his face from people he's not quite comfortable with and muting that side of him that would even make expressions. As the Hand, he's a lot quieter, and he no longer has a sanctuary where his real face is necessary...or so he says.
He needs Jadus' to be his eyes more than ever, with little else he can rely on.
1 note · View note
snghnlvr · 9 months ago
Text
hope they caught us. / sim jaeyun
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
jake x fem reader
synopsis: you knew that an academic girl like you shouldn’t be involved with a mischievous boy like jake, but both of you hide it well…right?
includes: 3.5k words | SUGGESTIVE | fluff too to balance it out lol | jake being a hot mischievous boy next door | but he’s smart! we love a hot, smart guy who thrives attention for y/n | jake’s hand placements⁉️ | y/n is shy but jake likes that | smooth talker jake yessir | LIP PIERCING JAKE !!
extra: hey bffs i’m back from my own grave 👯‍♀️ i lost motivation for a moment but it’s fine, ill try to post more~ | i’ve watched anne with an e so the language here is kind of similar to that style bc i love that fucking show and it inspired me 🤷‍♀️ | enhypen 🔛🔝 | jake has been so fine lately omfg | jake is a fucking simp!!!
likes, comments, and reposts are very much appreciated <3
[below the cut]
“j-jake-“ you pulled away from his grasp, heaving for air after that short yet everlasting kiss both of you shared secretly.
“you know we can’t be seen together.” as your flushed cheeks were on display in front of him, despise all of it, your mind was full of worries and anxiety of being caught by one of your family members or risking into a more intense situation in your bedroom.
“god, you’re so pretty whenever i look at you.” you scrunched your nose at your boyfriend’s compliment as he had a small smug smirk from your shy, silent reaction. you quickly turned your head towards the door, eyeing the hallway like a hawk to check if there was anyone near by and to your fortune, you can still hear the laughter and voices from the adults downstairs. you felt relieved, sighing softly.
your pondering thoughts became interrupted when you felt jake’s hand slither around your waist and pull you back again closer to him. you gasped, having both of your palms being in placed of his chest. he raised an eyebrow as you were taken aback from his gesture that was normal for him to do.
you were a blushing mess, however jake was smiling like a trickster- not giving a damn about what he’s doing to you, rather amused. you stared at him, observing how obnoxiously handsome he is with his hair being slightly disheveled up from your hands a few seconds ago, his hooded eyes gazing to yours and his lips being stained from your favorite shade of red from forbidden exchange that was yet mutual. the sight was scandalous but breathtaking.
you wanted to stare at him for hours, like a painting from a museum, trying to analyze every beautiful feature that earth has offered.
as the moonlight reflected your bodies from your small window, jake felt a breeze from it. the window’s open a tad bit. he sat down on the little space your window offered for sitting. he admired your wavy locks being swayed by the night air and your crimson cheeks being glowed from the radiance of the moon.
both of you smiled in delight, contented with each other’s presences.
jake. sim jake. adventurous yet devilish. elegant yet charming. sincere yet … complicated to deal with.
as you met the rebellious individual, you had no intentions of befriending jake. you didn’t like his trickster behavior in front of his friends, spreading unhumorous jokes, say the meanest things about teachers and most of all having an egotistical mind that one cannot top.
especially jake, for he is not only annoyingly attractive but naturally intelligent in his studies. maybe that’s why you didn’t entirely hate his guts.
your parents warned you about jake ever since he became not only your new classmate but your new neighbor. how innocent looks can cover their sinful stunts.
the way he showed himself to you at a family dinner at your place, he wore all black clothings including black ripped jeans along with multiple rings on his slim fingers and a lip piercing being proudly displayed on the right side of his face. in spite of it, you were surprised how someone your age can look daunting to look at. it somehow concerned your parents how one can allow their child to have piercings.
you would rather be the opposite. your closet would be filled with soft pastel colors. you have two piercings - the lobes. the ones where you would get at a young age and you never recall as you grow older but yet looking at jake’s, you thrived the curiosity of one.
but somehow, it ease your parents’ tension against him when he became a smooth talker and how he was gonna major engineering in college. you gawked at him, comparing how you were gonna take pre-med in college. just wondering how smart can he be?
and of course, as a shy girl you would always stray away in making new friends as if you wanted to be friends with jake. at a family gathering, you were the first one finished with your meal and went upstairs to do your unfinished homework. as a result, jake’s parents admired you for your hard work and dedication, wishing that their son can do the same instead of partying and socializing. not that there’s something wrong with having an extroverted personality, but something to prioritize with studies.
perhaps you did do it on purpose for the sake of your ego against jake and to maintain a good reputation as a daughter in your family.
unlucky enough, jake caught your act rather quickly. he would always scan you whenever you would converse with someone, how your lovely smile would appear, your glowy brown eyes shining under the gleaming light, how he had noticed you have small dimples on both sides of your cheek if your lips curved, how you scrunch your face when you receive a compliment, and your hair look looking smooth. he wonders what it’s like to touch it with his fingers and smell the scent that your hair obtains. there’s many more observations jake silently took note of.
all of his thoughts are genuine. about you. everything he thought about you are genuine.
he noticed whenever you would quickly glance at him and immediately look down at your plate as if you were scared. you would nibble your bottom lip and fiddle with your fingers on your lap whenever the adults mentioned jake to you.
needlessly to say as he took interest upon your first impression, he wanted you to be on his mind as well. in a way that makes him be stuck in your head for days and let curiosity rise to know him better.
the first step in his plan, to offer you to be his tutor. it surprised his parents, amazed at seeing a drastic change in their son after being in your house for one night. although he might in a higher level than you are, he wanted to find a way to know you better.
the night he was supposed to be partying with his friends, it was with books and you.
it was awkward. you felt awkward. your mind had awkward thoughts. the two of you in your room together in the midday of an autumn day. although your window was closed, your body was cold as you were cuddling yourself with a fluffy blanket of yours while sitting down.
next to you was jake, his uniform was a bit crumpled and his tie loosen up a bit after saying, “hope you don’t mind.” to you.
you noticed how his hair was a bit out of place, having the urge to fix it as the perfectionist you are.
however, despite looking tired from his classes, he seemed curiosity and his eyes would sparkle whenever something in your room caught his eye. like noticing your piano medals spread across in a shelf or picture you’ve kept when you were in art class in second grade pinned in your walls.
“so… what subject are you struggling with?” you were the first to break the awkward silence, eyes glancing at the emptiness of your desk table hoping that it would be filled with a textbook of any subject.
“statistics.” jake replied after, gulping in nervousness to make any wrong move on you. you raised an eyebrow.
“oh!” you straightened yourself in your chair, making your blanket slowly fall down. your shoulders from your cami top were exposed to jake, making him take into admiration of your beauty from your single lamp open.
you looked at jake. “the test scores were given back today right? can i see your test score so i can have an idea in what to teach you?” you smiled at jake as a reassurance message.
jake’s eyes widened a bit, taken aback from your sudden request. you noticed the moment of silence, thinking that jake is embarrassed to show you but jake was thinking of something else. he didn’t except nor imagine this scenario taking place. it was something that might make you mad.
“it’s okay, i’m here to teach you not to make fun of you, you can be honest with me.” you nodded at jake, seeing him zip his back bag open behind him. he scooted his chair closer to you.
now you were taken aback from the sudden gesture that he wasn’t even fazed. his eyes were glued onto his folder but your eyes were glued onto his side profile. under the luminous light, it complimented his features well that you questioned how handsome can this boy get?
“whatever you do, please don’t get mad.” he spoke in a low tone. you distracted yourself with another thoughts, nodding quickly so you wouldn’t get caught doing the unforgiven, staring.
you gawked once he opened his folder, with the numbers written in red marker. a big fat 100 smacks you on the face.
“w-what..” you were in disbelief at what you were saying. you were confused as to why he needed tutoring when he got a perfect score. you studied so hard he night before the exam to get a passing grade of 100, but it only resulted in an 80. even worse, jake’s grade wasn’t curved.
it made you be in a lost of thoughts as you glanced at jake. you noticed how his shoulders crouching down and avoiding eye contact like a guilty kid caught in the act.
maybe he can be your tutor instead which is humiliating to accept.
“you lied?” jake whined mentally at how devastated you sound. he was trying to quickly find a way to defend himself but what would he say instead of, i just wanted to know you better? sounds like a psychopath.
his lips trembled, “i-i .. okay look y/n..” you softened when you said your name with such delicacy and softness that it slowly made you forget being disappointed at him. “i just wanted to know you better, not as a neighbor but perhaps a friend since we will be often seeing each other a lot.. and i couldn’t find a way to approach to you without being weird..”
jake rambled with his words, slowly breathing in a fast pace after his chest was relieved from all of the stress he endured of defending himself. he looked at you with sad eyes, knowing that he disappointed you, that you probably never want to ever see him again and how you will snitch to him to your parents and they will forbid you to ever go near him again. but instead of crying your heart out and running away as he imagined, you instead chuckled. you were amused at his creative idea that you wonder how can he have such an idea like this one?
“you wanted to know me better?” you asked again, appreciating the thought that he wanted to be your friend but in an unusual way.
“yeah..” jake lowered his shoulder, whispering his reply to you. he looked at you chuckling at him.
“we can be friends jake, you didn’t have to do all of this.” you slightly rubbed your eye with your index finger, tired of giggling from jake. “i know.. i guess i was scared that i might look like a weird guy to you.” he embarrassingly scratched the back of his hair with his hand. his hair bounced against his flustered head.
“well you seem weird from the first impression but other than that, you seem harmless.. i hope.” you scrunched your nose unconsciously, making jake’s heart fluttered from the dimples appearing on your face whenever you do it.
the more days spent with jake under the act of “tutoring him”, it was him tutoring you instead since he told you that he enjoyed math and physics.
you thought he was a crazy scientist planning to ban away society from earth but the more time you witnessed him enjoy doing homework, you couldn’t help but think about him from time to time in appreciation that there’s someone who’s sincere as him. effortless and a natural.
during those moments, he did nothing but make you laugh and somehow make your heart flutter from his doings. it influenced your heart to be a mess. moments such as pulling your back bag from behind so there’s less weight and it’s lighter to walk with it while going home together from school, raise your blanket higher whenever it lowered from your body whenever both of you studied, and making your body electrocuted from the constant coincidental touches both of you share unknowingly.
although there would be times where jake pulled out his witty jokes and random comments to gravitate your focus onto him, he never forced anything onto you. he keeps his boundaries on alert and respected your feelings.
for instance, if he tried to make a conversation with you while you were studying and you tell him to be quiet, he would. immediately. he would slide the chair away from you, slightly sulking and try to find ways to occupy his bored self.
playing games on his phone is one thing but another would be exploring your room. jake found your art journal from middle school while snooping your drawers next to your bed.
or that one time he unfortunately came across your polka dot underwear lying freely on the floor when he eagerly and abruptly came upstairs after school as you tried beating him first to your room after screaming that you didn’t clean your room.
yeah that was the first time you yelled at him.
besides that, there would be times where you found jake adorable such as trying not to sleep whenever both of you were alone in one of each other’s room, whining in how a certain teacher sucks at their teaching job, and the crazy story times he experienced in his life. it made you realize how such a human can have so much impact in your life in less than a year?
nevertheless, you had to avoid each other at school to not let any rumours about the two of you knowing each other be spread across. jake completely understood as you didn’t want any drama from occurring in your final year of high school. there would be times where the both of you spared glances and smile at each other, missing each other’s presences deeply.
there was a moment where both of you laid in jake’s bed after studying, taking a small break before you return home for supper.
“y/n i’ve been thinking..” your heart thumped after hearing jake’s deep voice while closing your eyes. you never heard jake with this tone so it felt new and exciting.
you opened your eyes, turning your head to your right to face him as his stare was focused on the ceiling above him.
“i really like being with you. you made me realize how there’s always good in a bad place. and i really want to continue to be with you…” you sharped a breath when his picky was interlocking with yours.
he finally turned at you and for once you were grateful that he didn’t witness how red your cheeks were becoming. you were become a mess at how sparkly his eyes were and beautiful his lips can be. especially with that piercing of his.
this feeling was brand new to you. you’ve never been close to a boy before as you were merely focused in your education. boys weren’t prioritizing your mind.
“do you like being with me too?” jake asked, softly as if you were gonna be broken glass. he was being fragile in case he will do something wrong to you. he spoke with hesitation.
your mind was filled with memories that you spent with him from the past few months and you can’t but wanting to spend more memories with him.
“of course i do jake. every moment i spent with you, i feel free against the world that my parents created from me. you make me feel like it’s okay to step out of the comfort zone.” you smiled against your lips.
jake soon did the same as you continued to stare at each other with silence, having a significant spark in each other’s hearts for the first time.
“can i court you then?” jake’s hand slowly creep to yours, softly grasping it. you looked down, your heart pounding as if it was gonna explode from your rib cage.
god you never felt more in love than before. “i would like that jake..” you sheepishly smiled, letting go of his grasp to hide your shy smile but jake didn’t allow that.
jake slowly took the hand that was covering your beautiful smile, taking his hand with it. you were silent, eyeing his every action as jake kept staring at you.
your fingers were lingering the cold metal against his lips and it made your body shivered.
it was like he was having a different emotion in his eyes that you couldn’t identify but you felt safe when you were with him.
jake pecked your palm and held it against his cheek. he closed his eyes, processing the fact that you’re now his and he’s yours.
and the fact that you have to hide it from your parents for now.
and here you are currently, “a penny for your thoughts pretty girl?” jake swept a strain of hair behind your ear. you shook your head, lowering your head in his neck to hide your flushed cheeks.
you would always do this whenever you were feeling bashful from jake’s bold behavior and he loved it. that he was the only boy that made you be like this.
“it’s just you’re so beautiful when you look like that..” you whispered against his neck. jake raised both of his eyebrows, surprise at the sudden change in your usual personality. the position you were in, where jake was sitting down and you were standing above him.
his legs being comfortably spread out so each of his leg is next to yours it made you be in a pit of nervousness and jake took note of it. jake always love how expressive you are with your own eyes as if it was telling a story if your mouth goes mute upon seeing his figure wherever, whenever.
seeing him below you caused a spark in your heart as his eyes stared at you with devotion and attentiveness. jake noticed how your eyes changed when you kept staring at him with a specific look. a look that makes him even more whipped for you.
“really?” jake’s hands slowly crept towards your hips, lightly massaging it before he pulled you closer to him, causing you stumble lightly and sit on his lap thanks to jake’s strength in holding you still. your legs straddled his each side of his hip.
you looked down, realizing the situation you were in but jake kept holding his signature smirk as he was loving your reaction. he kept staring at you, swallowing the beauty you are in front of him. he didn’t want to get you go, thinking you are a dedicate feather ready to disappear if let go.
“well uhm,” you scoffed lightly, keeping a wide grin to disguise the apprehension from your face. as you were at a loss of words - not having a quick way to reply to jake, he took it as an opportunity to steal a kiss from your soft lips.
the sound echoed in your head, making your heart flutter listening to it. you closed your eyes again when jake stole another one.
you looked at him, filled with fond and passion. the silence aura, it spoke louder than words of how much you two love it each other.
you lightly placed your hand against jake’s resting on your hip comfortably with a small smile on your lips. you rubbed his fingers lightly.
“i love you.” as fragile as you sounded whispering the truth spilled from your lips, your heart never felt any less warmer with any other guy besides your secret boyfriend in front of you.
jake’s other hand, cradled your jaw. his thumb was slowly rubbing your cheek as his thoughts were filled of the words “i love you” multiple times. he swore he was gonna be a psychopath with you.
he didn’t say, but you felt it.
“i love you too my y/n.” both of your lips collided with a deep kiss after jake exchanged his romantic confession to you.
“y/n!” you immediately pulled out of the kiss, mentally whining that it ended too quick due to your mother calling you.
“yes?” you yelled back back as jake didn’t stop kissing you. he continued showcasing his love for you when his lips touched your neck, having little pecks as he was attached from your perfume scent you sprayed on before jake’s parents arrived to your home.
you were squirming on his lap as his lips kept going places on your neck. the sounds of his lips touching your skin made your head be distracted from your mother’s voice.
you tried stopping jake, pushing your palms against his chest to pull him off but jake insisted, grabbing both of your wrists with his one hand. you felt jake’s smirk onto your neck as you felt the tip of his tongue on your hot skin, making you gasp.
“jake’s parents are going home now! please send jake downstairs.” your mother yelled out. you sighed after you replied with okay to her, ignoring your heart trying to escape from your ribcage.
“jake..” you called him before he gets distracted with his desirable thoughts of wanting to continue in kissing you. you ruffled his hair to awake his senses but he has beat you to it.
“what a shame..” he scrunched his nose. “i’ll go now, i’ll definitely miss you.” jake pressed his lips one last time to your cheek before you removed yourself from him to get his things.
jake grabbed his black, round glasses from your table and the flannel he tossed in your bed the moment he entered to your room.
this time, you were observing your boyfriend picking up his possession, especially with the gray sweatpants and a white plain tank top. simple yet still handsome in every way and form. you can’t believe that jake is yours.
before jake left, his hand wrapped around your door knob indicating his hesitation. “hm?” you hummed in confusion when you turned your head to see jake stand still. you were curious of what was holding him back.
“i’ll be at your window in 10 minutes.” jake looked back. his eyes were gazing your figure in your bed. you looked up at him and his heart still flutters just as he first saw you.
you taken aback with this new gesture of his that you didn’t know what to say. “i-ill see you then.” you let out a smile. jake smiled back before quickly heading downstairs. you heard the mixture of his voice and you the adults downstairs as you fell sideways in your bed, making your head bounce on your pillow.
with his mischievous and brave acts with you, you’re certain that one day both of you will be caught but you never objected the idea of doing so.
taglist ; @iraisswiftie @s00buwu
1K notes · View notes
devotedlystrangewizard · 2 years ago
Text
i hate it so much when people try to tell me how to study because every single method feels like trying to shove a balloon through a brick wall
#i cant study. like actually#schoolwork isnt just not fun to me its. actual torture#i always start crying while doing homework because my brain is just so fucking foggy i cant ??? function???#i cant retain information im not interested in but let me do you one better. i cant even consume it in the first place#im not. a functional person#im in my final year and idk if ill make it literally BECAUSE im. i cant fucking do this?#personal#btw#and jts always 'well at least try to study its only one more year' I GOT THROUGH HIGH SCHOOL. BECAUSE OF COVID#I NEVER WOULD HAVE REACHED THIS POINT IF IN MY THIRD YEAR THE SCHOOL HADNT SAID 'ok everyone passes'#AND I NEED THIS?#DROPPING OUT IN THIS COUNTRY EVEN AT 18 IS NIGH ON ILLEGAL#gifted kid syndrome was never about reading better than the rest of ur class when u were 8 bc u were a nerd#its about always being fucking praised for every minor thing and then growing up to be completely useless#and its stupid! i KNOW my life is allowed to exist i KNOW im not useless i KNOW that i deserve better than what ive gotten up till now#but im so fucking sick of the constant 'oh you can do better' and my classmates going 'oh ur so smart ahaha' and just.#the dchool system wasnt made to support anyone ever#it supports the average child with average intelligence who works and studies and that child is so fucking rare#and its even worse when my sister is doing a level higher than me is doing a sport AND is looking for a job#and shes fine! she gets good grades! but i can barely manage to get through this and everything is just a fucking brick wall#and i keep smashing my head against it trying again and again to get through but all im getting is another fucking headache#i hate people who say shit like 'ooh videogames ruin ur school life' bc videogames are the only things in my life rn i can think about#without feeling like shit!#i csn ramble about videogame lore for 6 hours or i can sob uncontrollably there is no difference i am not a fucking person anymore#autistic burnout gang lmao i am losing my fucking mind#every time i try explaining it to someone its just 'well just try' IVE TRIED. FOR THE PAST SEVEN YEARS. ITS ENOUGH. IM DONE.#anyway thats the story of how i ended up crying about my french exam tomorrow#it is 2 am#i have to figure out a dessert for christmas i can barely fucking breathe and i am once again trying to make as little sound as possible#im so tired
0 notes
allpiesforourown · 1 month ago
Note
I have such intense feelings for your bingyuan roommate au, it’s unreal. Binghe would be the BIGGEST green tea bitch/pick me girl but only towards sy, no one else. encountering lbh in the wild first and then experiencing him next to sy would be a fever dream of epic proportions. actual dozens of women would want to behead him and rip out his guts. bc lbh would ditch them on their birthday, an actual medical emergency, or anything critical at all just bc sy vaguely implied he was hungry (lbh now HAS to cook for him, it is not a want, it is a NEED)
And sy would be worse then evvvver, lol. “That’s my little didi binghe, he’s so sweet and sensitive, girls are always breaking his heart :((( If I were his girlfriend I’d get married to him next week and bounce on him silly style. Too bad no one will ever appreciate binghe like I do :(((((” and it is only after MANY of those thoughts that he realizes that he might not feel all that brotherly towards lbh
on a hornier note, I’m at a toss up between thinking that lbh would bring his hookups/girlfriends back to his and sy’s home and fucking them there (bc in lbh’s mind he can’t cum right without the reminder of his gege… and what if gege walked in 🤤… maybe lbh can get him to join…) or him absolutely refusing to let any of them so much as glance at his gege (no one should look at sy except him)
EXACTLY EXACTLY EXACTLY you get it anon.
It's literally like
Woman: let's have a threesome with your friend
Binghe: the idea sounds so appealing but I don't want some stranger getting his hands on him! I don't want to share him with someone who doesn't show him the love he needs. I'm the only one who knows him well enough to be in a threesome with shen yuan
Woman: thats sex. You're just describing regular two people sex. You want to fuck your best friend.
In my head for this au I imagine them as long time friends.. shen yuan found binghe getting bullied at a park or something when they were kids and told his bullies to fuck off. Then he listened to binghe cry about how he's so worried about his sick mom being overworked and begged his parents to hire binghes mom. With way better pay, hours, and work environment, her health improved a lot and she's good friends with shen yuans parents.
Binghe tells himself he acts like shen yuans guard dog because he'll always be grateful for what he's done for his family, but really, he fell in love with his Yuan ge at first sight the second he saw a boy standing up for him instead of ignoring his bullying.
Someone: say something nice about your best friend
Binghe: oh I have so much to say! He's so sweet and intelligent and adorably nerdy ! He saved me and my mom and-
Someone: say something nice about your girlfriend
Binghe: um..... uh ...... well.... sometimes she... hmm......
The poor women he dates. They'd go through SO much suffering trying to "fix" him and then when they finally give up after going through hell itself, they see bingge and shen yuan get together and suddenly the most negligent terrible boyfriend in the world is buying flowers and posting corny pictures on Instagram and proposing a few months into the relationship.
Shen yuan: I can't believe I managed to bag someone as handsome beautiful and loving as binghe. He wakes up at 6am every morning to get started on breakfast so he can feed me in bed. He's so attentive I worry I'm taking advantage of him. How did he get broken up with so often? No one appreciates people like binghe
Everyone else binghe has ever dated: I told him I got stabbed and he left me on read
373 notes · View notes
charlesxavierthirster3000 · 1 month ago
Text
Burdened — L. Howlett
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Pairing: Logan Howlett x Fem!Reader
Summary: Based on this request!!!!
CW/Tags: not proofread bc I literally finished this at 5am 😭, Logan is an ASS, a lot lot of feelings, lowk heavy angst I THINK, no use of Y/N, don't like don't read.
A/N: @rambosgirl Ily girlie I really enjoyed writing this :33 I AM SO INSANELY SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG !!!!!!! Also while writing the ending of this my Spotify Smart Shuffle fucking played First Love/Late Spring by Mitski and I swear it knows how fitting it is bro wtaf ok LAST statement but like this is my first 1K+ word fic are you guys proud of me :33 I'm starting this at like 3am so don't bully me if the ending doesnt' make sense ok byeeeeeeeee
WC: 1.6K (get comfy guys) / Navigation
Tumblr media
It was unnecessarily irritating. And frankly really, really fucked up.
Anytime you turned your back from a seemingly butterfly-inducing interaction with Logan, you found him all over Jean as if he wasn’t just chatting you up four minutes ago.
Jean Grey was—from what you’ve surveyed over your time at the mansion—not really phased, despite her somewhat established relationship with Scott. She was intelligent and good-natured, flashing you sickeningly sweet smiles in the corridors and occasionally complimenting your outfits as if hers weren’t twice as stunning.
But every time you spotted Logan gazing down at her with the look you thought he’d reserved for your eyes only, the image of perfection the redheaded telepath had materialised in front of you dissipated like a glass of ice left to liquefy under the scorching sun.
Because she never pushed him away, and she was so clearly inevitably attracted, whether she displayed it or not. It was virtually written all across her sharp features, and you knew the same was scripted all over your own when speaking to Logan.
That dip your heart made every time you saw the two’s chemistry from afar; it wasn't just blatant jealousy. 
It was deeper.
It was nastier.
It clung to your insides like a weight you couldn't possibly shake off. The constant sense that you were just a swift distraction, a momentary diversion from the real object of his desire. 
It ate you up from the inside out and exhausted you to no end.
When Storm or Rogue cautiously approached you and tried to console you, you shrugged it off as if it was some uncomplicated highschool sweetheart drama. They knew damn well it wasn’t. Your conflicting feelings for Logan were gradually making you lose yourself— your well-built dignity. You were slowly but surely morphing into someone you didn’t even recognise. Someone who accepted being second best without any contemplation.
All for a man who was immortal. All for someone who presumably considered you a fleeting paragraph in his primitive life while he was an entire novel in yours.
You wanted— needed to locate yourself in the vast body of water which was your feelings. You needed your sense of self-worth to reappear by a miracle, nevertheless, you knew it would take immense time and exertion to track it back down.
But in a wretched attempt to do so, you settled on a fairly elaborate plan and started disregarding each one of Logan’s advances. Suddenly, you conveniently had somewhere else to be every time he approached, you pulled back and overlooked his easy smiles along with the playful banter you practically used to feed off of.
At first, it felt as if you were reclaiming some of your power, spotting his perplexed looks in your peripheral vision as you wandered off to God knows where. But of course, everything you did came back to bite you in the ass. If anything, it only made the truth clearer. He barely even noticed, and if he did, he didn’t give a single shit.
And Jean? She remained unbothered, untouchable— flawless, even. You were the mastermind of this whole game, yet you were the only one losing.
Tumblr media
After a particularly humiliating stretch of witnessing Logan and Jean’s shared giggles and stolen looks from across the table, you ultimately found your resolve. Alcohol really was liquid courage, because after a few drinks and several stabs of food, you closed in on them lounging on the couch post-meal. 
Logan’s bare arm was extended across the back of the grimy cushions behind Jean like some kind of cheesy rom-com, cowlicks a prominent silhouette against the weak flickering of the television. But no matter how much you resented them— her, you would never even come by the opportunity to be in the redhead’s position.
“Howlett,” you enunciated, voice sharp enough to slice through the ambient noise like a shard of glass.
Howlett. No other soul could call him that without repercussions. Aside from you. That was why you felt so unique, so distinct from the others, that was the crumb of specialty you were desperately clinging on to.
He shifts to glance over his shoulder, a spark of recognition igniting within him at the sound of your voice—not missing the shred of urgency concealed beneath it. “Hm? What's up?”
You hesitate with your next words, intently but subtly taking in his scruffy features in the dimmed lighting for what felt like it could be the final time. Because after this, you knew for a fact neither one of you could view each other in the same way. You were the one who let him under your skin, you were the one who had to tear him out, and it unfortunately was an agonisingly slow process.
“We need to talk.”
Four words. Yet, it still gave you the sensation of several weights placed upon your back; the unavoidable impending argument, manipulation spat right into your face, and the most dreaded of all, how circumstances would be after tonight.
His expression stiffened mildly as he reluctantly got up from the couch, aged leather groaning beneath his weight. The sensation of Jean abruptly invading the back of your mind was extremely unsettling and even though she appeared unphased, she, without a question, detected your abnormal uneasiness and was gingerly flicking through your thoughts.
Which was apprehensive, to say the least.
Logan fell into step with you as you departed from one of the many doddering living rooms, proceeding to a more secluded space nearing the obnoxious stairs in front of the grand entryway, mansion almost bizarrely silent with all the kids asleep. Jean wasn’t in your head anymore, but she undoubtedly already knew your objectives to the script.
You halted and so did Logan, weight finding its position set upon the auburn wood of the stairs. 
He eyed you with undivided attention. Your stomach threatened to do a fucking flip despite the conditions, the look nearly making you scrap all of this and go right back to being his side piece regardless of the anguish it put your mind through. But you dug your heels in, the clearing of your throat echoing sharply off the vacant walls.
You square your shoulders and tilt your chin up boldly, aiming to stand your ground. “What the hell am I to you? Because from what I see and a whole lot of other people do, I’m just an afterthought. Filler for the gaps Jean left open. Care to elaborate on that, Howlett?” 
He sighed, glancing at the wall behind you as if he was already fed up. “It’s not like that, bub. You’re makin’ it bigger than it is.”
Your blood scorched at the casual dismissal. Your voice inevitably rose but doesn’t go over a whisper, “Don’t patronise me, Logan,” you scoff. “I’m not some stupid kid with a stupid crush, so don’t let your ego get out of hand. I’ve watched you get all up on her, and then come to me when she’s got a class. Do you even fucking hear yourself?” 
His jaw stiffened, his own frustration growing. “You really think it’s that easy? I never asked you to get involved. You know how it is with me and her. You don’t get how fucked my life is, it’s your own fuckin’ fault things got messy.”
“Yeah, yeah. Go sulk somewhere else, I don’t give a shit how crappy your life is. It doesn’t take much to be a decent fucking human!— mutant, whatever. I’m not gonna let you come crying to me when things don’t work out with Jean. I’m worth more than that. You can’t see that, it’s your damn problem, not mine.”
He was visibly trying to find his footing, and you took it as an opportunity to carry on, “It’s not my fault this got sloppy. You can’t just invite a woman for a nice drive and end up throwing her out the door a moment later. You knew damn well what you were doing to m—” 
“You don’t know what I gotta deal with every day. It’s difficult. I never wanted it to get like this. You were the one overthinkin’ it.”
You shook your head forcefully, exasperation boiling over. “I don’t give a fuck, Logan— stop hiding behind that, you don’t even remember half of your damn life! It’s not messy, it’s cruel. I’ve had my own trouble, but I don’t use it as an excuse to hurt people who care about me. Don’t put all of it on my back.”
He opens his mouth to retort, but you cut him off. “Don’t. Don’t say anything. I’ve dealt with you for half my time here. I’ve had enough of your bullshit.” A flash of remorse graced his eyes but it didn’t do a thing. 
“I’m not your backup plan. I’m not waiting for you to look at me the way you look at Jean. I deserve someone who doesn’t just act like they give a shit. I’ve made my choice and you’ve made yours. I’m done. Goodnight, Howlett.”
With a harsh turn of your heel, you walked away with a heavy heart. But your head was clear for the first time in months, your shoulders were lighter, and the clarity you felt nearly blew your veins out. It would be painstakingly tough to face him tomorrow morning, but you knew you would get over it eventually.
Tumblr media
Also i just realised in the morning Washing Machine Heart works WAYYy better but it's whatever I guess 😮‍💨
380 notes · View notes
natsaffection · 3 months ago
Note
Heyyy :) So I've been thinking - Nat and R don't really like each other, there's no hate but occasionally fights and yeah they just avoid each other most of the time... R has been out drinking alone after one of those fights bc she realized that she actually fell for Nat some time ago and just denies it? And R gets in a fight on her way home with someone, ends up pretty badly hurt but doesn't call someone instead just tries to get to her room on the compound and fix herself but instead she ends up in Nats room somehow and Nat takes care of her? + some fluffy cuddles and kisses perhaps?
Fury and Friction. | N.R
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Warnings: Fighting, arguing, description of injury
Word Count: 2,4k
A/N: I hope Y/n doesn't come across as too harsh, but that makes the end more..I don’t want to spoil. 🫂
It was another exhausting day of training. The Team had gathered to improve their skills, each focused on pushing their limits. Natasha and you were paired together, much to both of your displeasure. Your sparring sessions often ended with bruises and frayed nerves.
As you circled each other, the tension in the air was palpable. Natasha's movements were fluid and precise, each step carefully calculated. You, on the other hand, were aggressive and relentless, your strikes driven by a mix of frustration and determination.
"You need to control your anger," Natasha said as she dodged a particularly fierce blow. "It makes you predictable."
"And you need to stop underestimating me." you retorted, your eyes sparkling with defiance. Her words were as sharp as her movements, each sentence a deliberate jab meant to wound. It wasn't just about the fight, it was about proving a point, about not backing down. "Maybe you'd cause fewer problems if you learned to follow orders, Y/n."
"And maybe people would actually want to work with you if you weren't such a control freak." you shot back, your frustration evident. Natasha's eyes narrowed. "I'm just trying to keep you from getting yourself killed. You need to think clearly, not just charge ahead blindly."
"Stop treating me like I don't know what I'm doing!" you snapped and Natasha's patience was wearing thin. She took a deep breath, trying to remain calm. "I want you to be careful. You're too valuable to be lost to reckless decisions."
But you weren't listening. You were convinced that Natasha saw you as a project, someone in need of constant correction. This belief only fueled your anger and made you more stubborn. The room fell silent, the others exchanging uneasy glances. They knew better than to intervene. The hostility between you and Natasha was a storm best weathered from a safe distance.
Six months ago:
The sun was setting over the ruins of Sokovia, casting long shadows across the devastated landscape. The air was thick with smoke and the echoes of distant explosions. Natasha was in the midst of coordinating the evacuation, her mind focused on the task at hand.
That's when she first met you.
You were a lone operative, sent by SHIELD to assist with the evacuation and gather intelligence. Your introduction was abrupt, almost confrontational. Natasha had seen you from afar, a solitary figure moving through the debris with near reckless determination.
"Who the hell are you?" Natasha demanded as she approached, "Agent L/N, here to help from SHIELD." Natasha's eyes narrowed. "I wasn't informed about additional operatives."
"Looks like you missed the memo.." You replied challengingly.
From that, the dynamic was tense. Natasha saw you as an impulsive rookie, someone who hadn't yet earned their place. You saw Natasha as overly cautious and controlling, a relic of an older generation out of touch with the times. Your approaches clashed immediately, setting the stage for the hostility that would follow.
Later that evening, the Team gathered in the common area for a rare moment of relaxation. Natasha, ever the social butterfly, laughed and chatted with some of the newer recruits. Her effortless charm and magnetic presence drew people in, and you noticed.
You watched from a distance, your eyes narrowing as Natasha casually flirted with a young agent. Jealousy stirred within you, a feeling unfamiliar. You tried to ignore it, but the more you watched, the harder it became.
"Everything okay?" Clint's voice broke through your thoughts, his concern evident. You forced a smile. "Yeah, just tired." Clint glanced at Natasha and then back at you, a knowing look in his eyes. "You know, she's not as bad as you think." Your smile faded. "She's insufferable."
"Or maybe you just don't see the whole picture.." Clint suggested gently before walking away, leaving you alone with your conflicting feelings.
The next mission briefing was tense again. The team was set to infiltrate another HYDRA facility, and the stakes were high. Tony outlined the plan, but it wasn't long before you and Natasha were at odds again. "This is a delicate operation," Natasha said, her tone brooking no argument. "We need to proceed with caution."
"And while we're sneaking around, HYDRA gets stronger," you snapped. "We need to hit them hard.."
"You're too reckless, Y/N." Natasha said. "You think you can solve everything with brute force."
"And you're a control freak.." your frustration boiling over. "You don't trust anyone but yourself." The room fell silent as your argument escalated. Your face was flushed with anger, your fists clenched at your sides. Natasha's eyes were cold, her jaw tightly set.
"You know nothing about trust," Natasha said quietly, but her words hit deep. "You're too busy trying to prove you're better than everyone else." Your eyes flashed with hurt and anger. "Maybe I have to because people like you will never see me as anything but a liability."
Natasha, who usually tried to stay calm, finally lost her patience. She turned directly to Tony, effectively ending the argument by shutting you out. The words hung in the air, a stark reminder of the deep-seated issues between you.
Back in the cold corridors of the HYDRA base, you and Natasha moved through the shadows, your movements silent and coordinated despite the underlying tensions. You reached a large room lined with computer servers.
As you worked to disable the security systems, a HYDRA agent emerged from a hidden passage, weapon raised. The agent fired, the bullet grazing your arm. You winced, a sharp intake of breath the only sign of pain.
"You're hit!" Natasha hissed, her eyes wide with concern as she swiftly took out the agent. "It's just a graze," you said, downplaying it. "I'm fine."
Natasha grabbed your arm, examining the wound. "You need to take this seriously. You could have been killed." You pulled your arm away, glaring at Natasha. "I said I'm fine. We have a mission to complete."
Natasha's eyes flashed with a mix of anger and worry. "You need to stop pretending you're invincible. This isn't just about you." Your expression softened for a moment, but your pride wouldn't let you concede. "I know that. But I can't afford to be cautious. Not now."
Natasha's grip on your arm tightened for a moment before she let go. "Just be... careful, damnet.." she said, her voice gentler. "We can't afford to lose anyone." You nodded, a fleeting understanding passing between you. Despite your differences, there was mutual respect buried beneath the layers of conflict and stubbornness.
That night, you couldn't sleep. You tossed and turned, your mind a whirlwind of conflicting emotions. You hated how Natasha got under your skin, how she made you feel vulnerable and inadequate. But there was something else, something deeper that you didn't want to acknowledge.
As you lay in the dark, memories of your mission in Siberia came to mind. Natasha's concern when you were grazed by the bullet, the way her eyes filled with worry . Just be...careful. It stirred something in you, something you desperately tried to suppress.
You got up and paced the room, your thoughts racing. "This is ridiculous.." you muttered to yourself. But the more you denied it, the stronger the feelings became. You couldn't ignore how your heart raced whenever Natasha was near, how your anger was tinged with something unsettlingly like longing.
The next day, you found yourself in the gym, trying to burn off your frustration of last night. You were in the middle of a rigorous workout when Natasha walked in. You exchanged a tense glance, but the atmosphere had shifted, a subtle change in how you moved around each other.
Natasha watched you for a moment, her expression unreadable. Then she approached cautiously. "Everything okay?" You paused, surprised by the question. "Why do you care?"
"Because despite everything, you're part of this team," Natasha said simply. "And I do care." Your eyes searched Natasha's, looking for any sign of insincerity. But all you saw was genuine concern. It confused you, made your defenses waver.
"I'm fine," you said, your voice softer than before. "Just trying to clear my head." Natasha nodded, her gaze lingering on you. "If you ever want to talk... I'm here."
It was a small gesture, but it meant a lot. In the weeks that followed, your relationship with Natasha began to improve. The sharp edges of your hostility softened, replaced by a cautious respect. You still argued, but the intensity had lessened, and there were moments of genuine camaraderie.
Natasha made an effort to give you more space and trust your instincts, while you tried to temper your impulsiveness with more strategic thinking. It wasn't perfect, but it was progress.
But the peace was short lived. One afternoon, you were in the kitchen, making a snack. Natasha entered the room, looking distracted. She opened the fridge and stared at the contents for a moment before closing it with a sigh.
"Everything okay?" you asked, trying to keep the conversation light. "Just tired." Natasha replied curtly. You could feel the tension and, against your better judgment, pushed a little further. "You seem upset. What's going on?"
Natasha's eyes flashed with an emotion you couldn't quite place. "It's nothing. Just drop it." Your frustration boiled over. "Why do you always act like everything's fine when it's not? You can talk to me, you know.."
Natasha snapped. "And why do you always have to push? Not everything has to be a confrontation, Y/N!" You were stunned, your own anger rising. "I was just trying to offer help! Maybe I push because you never let anyone in! Do you think you're the only one who feels anything?"
Natasha, recognizing the futility of the exchange, finally threw up her hands in exasperation. "You know what? Do whatever you want," she said coldly. "I'm done arguing with you. It's pointless."
With that, Natasha turned and left, leaving you standing there, angry and confused. You didn't understand why Natasha kept shutting you out, but it hurt more than you wanted to admit.
You grabbed your jacket and stormed out of the Tower, heading to a downtown bar. The neon lights and pulsing music were a stark contrast to the sterile environment of the Tower. You ordered a drink, then another, trying to drown your anger and confusion.
The bar was crowded, the air thick with the smell of alcohol and sweat. You found yourself the center of attention, a group of admirers drawn to your magnetic presence. You flirted and laughed, trying to distract yourself from thoughts of Natasha.
But the alcohol only amplified your feelings. The more you drank, the more your suppressed emotions surfaced. You couldn't stop thinking about Natasha, about your fights and the strange, confusing connection you kinda shared.
It wasn't long before one admirer decided to make a move. He grabbed your arm, his intentions clear. You yanked your arm free "Back off."
"Oh, come on, sweetheart. Just a bit of fun.." he slurred and stepping closer. You shoved him hard, sending him crashing into a table. The bar fell silent for a moment, then chaos erupted as a brawl broke out.
You ducked as a bottle flew past your head and shattered against the wall. You landed a quick punch to the man's chin, sending him to the floor. Another patron charged at you, but you dodged and used his momentum to send him into a nearby chair. The fight was quick and brutal, you held your own despite the numbers.
But you didn't escape unscathed. A punch landed on your forehead, splitting the skin, blood trickling down your face. Another kick hit your ribs, leaving you gasping in pain. Finally, the bouncers intervened, pulling you and the other fighters apart. You were escorted out of the bar, your adrenaline still pumping.
You made your way back to the Tower, your thoughts a jumbled mess. You replayed the fight in your head, the raw emotions and physical release of your pent-up frustration. But no matter how hard you tried, you couldn't shake thoughts of Natasha. God..
When you entered the Tower, your feet moved almost on their own, leading you through familiar corridors. Your hand hovered over your door. You tried to gather your thoughts. All the anger, the confusion, the feelings you'd been suppressing came rushing back.
Before you could open the door, it opened on its own. Natasha stood there, her expression a mix of surprise and concern. "What happened to you?" she asked, her eyes scanning the bruises and cuts from the fight. You blinked, confusion washing over you. "I... thought this was my room..“
Natasha raised an eyebrow, a hint of a smile playing on her lips. "Well, I see you've had a bit to drink. Come in, I can help you with that." You wanted to refuse, but the throbbing pain in your ribs and the blood dripping from your brow convinced you otherwise. You followed Natasha into the room.
Natasha led you to her bed and fetched a first aid kit from her dresser. She began cleaning your wounds with gentle hands, her touch surprisingly tender. You winced as the antiseptic stung, but you didn't pull away.
"Why did you get into a fight?" Natasha asked softly, her eyes focused on her work. You sighed, the alcohol and exhaustion making you more honest than usual. "I was angry. Frustrated. I needed to blow off steam.."
Natasha paused, her gaze meeting yours. "Was it because of our argument?" You looked away, feeling the weight of Natasha's gaze. "Partly. But it's more than that. I don't know how to handle...everything."
“I need to tell you something.” You turned to her, meeting her gaze. The vulnerability in her eyes was striking, a stark contrast to the fierce determination one had been used to seeing over the months.
“I’ve been unfair to you,” Natasha admitted, her voice trembling slightly. “I’ve been treating you like you needed constant watching, and it’s because I was.. scared. Scared that your stubbornness would get you hurt, or worse.”
You felt a lump in your throat as her words sank in. “Nat, I know I can be reckless. But I never meant to make you feel like you couldn’t trust me.”
“I just want you to be safe. I push you because I care about you, more than I’ve let on..” Her words hung in the air, heavy with emotion. You saw the glimmer of tears in her eyes and felt your own start to well up, “..And god, your stubbornne-“
Without thinking, you closed the distance between you, wrapping your arms around her in a tight embrace. Natasha’s arms encircled you, pulling you close. She held you tightly, as if afraid to let go. “I’m sorry, Y/n..” she whispered into your hair. “I’m sorry for being so hard on you. I just didn’t know how else to keep you safe.”
For a long moment, you both stayed like that, holding each other in the quiet light. The embrace was a balm to your frayed nerves, letting everything forget what has accumulated with you, "I-I care about you too, Nat..“ The room was silent. For the first time, you both allowed yourselves to be vulnerable. You looked up and into Natasha's eyes, seeing the vulnerability there, the fear and..the hope.
Without thinking, you leaned in, your lips brushing Natasha's in a tentative kiss. For a moment, Natasha froze, then she kissed you back, her hand gently cradling your cheek. The kiss was slow, filled with all the unspoken emotions you both had been holding back.
When you finally pulled away, you were both breathless, your foreheads resting against each other. "I'm sorry." you both said at the same time, laughing softly at the coincidence.
The mood lightened, the weight of your previous arguments lifted. You talked quietly through the night, sharing your fears and hopes, finally letting out what had been weighing on your hearts. As dawn broke, you were still curled up together, a newfound understanding and affection blossoming between you.
751 notes · View notes
titaswrld · 3 months ago
Note
I have a request for a deadpool fic, if you could make a very angsty story where deadpool thinks he is undeserving of love and never thinks someone in this world would fall for him 😭 he is self-conscious about his looks and never in his right mind it crossed him that he has a chance with the reader, but he would do anything just to feel loved. he's just a constantly depressed ball of sadness, and the only way he copes with his thoughts is his dark humor. while the reader is head over heels for that man, and she's showering him in love, but he only thinks it's because they're friends 😭🫶🏼
monster
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
description: wade wilson being insecure about his looks, not knowing if the girl he loves would ever love him back.
paring: wade wilson x reader!
contains: angst! with happy ending (i didn’t know how to end it😭)
w.c: 1.2k
|an: finally writing forreals again! i needed to get back into it. thank u for ur request, i hope u like it😇 reader is a baker bc i couldn’t think of a more wholesome career path😭
Tumblr media
you’ve known your best friend, wade wilson, for almost a year now. starting off as just occasional friends, hanging out at each other's apartments, watching chick flicks, and eating your weight in junk food until your friendship grew into something deeper, feeling nothing but love and admiration for another and the desire to be something more.
he’s so in love with you; he knows that now. he tried to deny it; he tried telling himself there’s no way, there’s absolutely no way a woman as intelligent, as confident, and as kind as you could ever love a monster like him. He knew you deserved better—a handsome, young, intelligent accountant or something.
his field of work is dangerous; he knows that. killing random people he doesn’t even know for cash. large sums of cash, sure. but, nonetheless, killing. he honestly always found it humorous, a trained marksman, mercenary, and vigilante , with his super cool awesome, still in school to become a pâtissière best friend!
he knew you’d leave; he knew no human being on planet earth could bear even looking at his rough, bumpy skin. that’s why he’s yet to show you his face, never failing to wear his mask around you, even though you’ve known each other for so long now. he didn’t know why you were still around after all this time even with the mask on, he knew most people found him to be annoying, aggravating, and just an all around piece of shit person, but for some reason, you liked him, and you enjoyed being around him.
he’s never had someone so close to him, as you are with him. you’re so kind, so affectionate, and so touchy. he thinks it’s just pity, you’d never think of him as anything more than a friend.
he dreamt of being the man who loved you the rest of your life; he wished that he could fall asleep and wake up to your face every day, make you laugh every day, eat every meal with you, watch every movie and every show, spend every holiday together, fuck, even start a family. he craved you. he craved your love, your care, and your kindness; he wanted to be normal with you, but he’s not normal, far from it. he knew better than that. he knew he didn’t deserve that. he would never be the man that you love.
he’s not ready to let you go, but he can’t keep his feelings for you inside any longer. he honestly dug himself into an even deeper hole, choosing to come over almost every free night he had. he couldn’t stay away from you; he hated being away from you. during every mission and every fight, all he thought about was coming home to you. you’re the only person who truly understood him for the man that he is, and he loves you for that. he’s never opened up to anybody the way that he’d opened up to you. you were special, so special to him. he was terrified.
you felt hopeless, stupid, and desperate. every advance you made, you’d failed. from baking him his favorite treats, to holding his hand while you watched a movie on the couch, to giving him hugs that lasted a little longer than necessary after a long mission, you couldn’t get your best friend out of your mind, not if you tried. hou crave him, his love, his care, his stupid fucking jokes that never end, his sarcastic nature, his sass—you don’t think you have ever loved a man the way that you love wade.
sometimes, he made you think that he might like you back, that he might have some sort of romantic interest in you, but it was quickly shut down after he made a joke, basically telling you that it would never happen.
you and wade were sitting on the couch, just talking, telling stories, and catching up after a particularly long time apart. until you had thought of a statement, that could’ve told you whether or not wade may or may not feel the same way.
your best friend, mia, had mistaken you and wade for a couple while on the phone. when you denied her statement, she apologized, saying she’s sorry for assuming, but you did spend all your time together..
when you told wade what she said, he doubled down in laughter before spitting out, “you? me? never. who is this friend? have i met her? has she seen me before? you might need to get her 5150’d.”
which did shatter your heart into a million pieces, but nonetheless, it wouldn’t stop you from trying to show him how much you care, how much you want to be with him, and how much you want to love him. he deserved love, and you wanted to give it to him.
each time he made a self-deprecating joke, it broke your heart. it was torture for you. the most he would ever do is lift his mask slightly when he ate with you, only to pop a piece of food in his mouth, then sheathe his face with his mask once again to chew, repeating the process until he’d finished. but even then, you never looked out of respect.
there were multiple occasions where you could’ve snuck a peek, where you could’ve turned around and saw his full face, but you knew how genuinely insecure he felt and how scared he was for you to see his face, so you never looked, not wanting to betray his trust or make him uncomfortable. you loved him, and you wish he understood that absolutely nothing could change that. especially not the way he looks.
today, you were sat on your couch, waiting for him to arrive. He said he’d be over tonight for the usual—rom-coms and junk food. but today, you felt different, your balls finally dropped, and you were ready to admit how you felt, whether it was a good or bad outcome, you were ready.
every single worst-case scenario clouded your thoughts, making your palms sweaty and causing a deep ache in your chest until you heard a knock at your door, saving you from plummeting even farther into your head.
you open the door, and time feels slow motion. you didn’t see deadpool; you saw wade for the first time- the real wade. standing there with an anxious expression plastered across his mottled face, snacks in one hand and flowers ripped from the dirt outside of your apartment complex in the other.
your stomach dropped along with your expression, the shock stunning you into place as you began to gather your thoughts. this is what he was hiding, you thought. jesus christ, all of that trouble for this? you could almost hit him.
wade, on the other hand, paced in your hallway, back and forth for 15 minutes before this, trying to decide whether he should just bail and leave the fucking country or finally stop being pussy and just show you his goddamn face.
after seeing your initial reaction, his head dropped, his gaze on the floor, as he muttered, “i know. total freak show, right? freddy kruger? craterface? cmon, lay it on me.”
now was your chance, as you cupped his face with your hands and pressed your soft lips against his dry, cracked ones. you felt his tense muscles drop and relax as he melted into the kiss, relishing in the feeling and making sure it was real, too.
you’d pulled away, looking him in the eyes and flashing a smile his way before placing kisses all over his cheeks, forehead, nose, and chin.
your gaze fell across his face once again, this time meeting you with a shit-eating grin plastered across his face.
“so— ten things i hate about you, or steel magnolias?”
Tumblr media
884 notes · View notes
watcherintheweyr · 7 months ago
Text
'Rhaenyra is a bad mom bc she knowingly gave birth to bastards and she knew how much danger they'd be in!!!!'
1. She had no way of knowing those babies wouldn't pop out looking exactly like her, beforehand. And unfortunately she couldn't stop at Jace. The throne needed an heir. Driftmark needed an heir. And a spare was needed as well, given the sheer rate of Targaryen children dying untimely deaths.
2. She had to provide heirs to the throne, and to Driftmark. If she hadn't, society wouldn't have blamed Laenor, they would have blamed her- which makes her position even more unstable, bc then she 'can't fulfill a woman's duty' so why would men think her 'able' to fill a 'man's role' by ruling the kingdom? And she and Laenor tried. He was either unable (meaning infertile or impotent, or unable to get it up), or unwilling. (And they did try. We dont know what they tried but Rhaenyra is shown to be clever in the show so honestly i have no doubt she attempted what Margaery suggested with Renly.) Laenor was in on the entire thing. He was aware of every part of this. He wasn't duped, he wasn't cuckholded- it was a plan greenlit by him, bc this way he and Rhaenyra would both have their heirs and a family. This cannot in any way shape or form be compared to Cersei cuckholding Robert (fuck Robert Baratheon tho), seeing as Robert was **not** at all aware that his children weren't his, and wouldn't have been OK with that.
Either way- she chose not to maritally r*pe her husband and put him through more trauma after it was clear their attempts weren't working. Yall are always so upset for Alicent (rightfully so, bc show!alicent was maritally raped, even if it wasn't considered as such in that time), but you... WANT Rhaenyra to do that to Laenor? Hello???
[And no. Rhaenyra did NOT rape or coerce Criston Cole. The actors, writers, and directors have all stated their sex was consensual and 'an act of love.' It was Rhaenyra going to someone she felt close to and trusted after feeling abandoned and unwanted and betrayed. In that scene you literally watch, as after Cole tells Rhaenyra to stop undressing herself, she moves aside so she isn't blocking his way to the door. The director states that the moment they show Cole folding and setting down his cloak was him choosing his desire over his oaths. And Criston Cole has known Rhaenyra since she was 14. He knew damn well the sort of person she was- and she was not the person who would have harmed him for saying no. She was an intoxicated and emotionally vulnerable 19 year old- Criston was in his late 20s to early 30s. And it's explicitly stated in ep.9 that the ONLY person a Kingsguard cannot refuse is the king. In ep.7 Criston disobeys a direct order from Alicent when she wants him to mutilate Lucerys. Criston Cole was not assaulted. Stop trying to assign Aegon's sins to Rhaenyra so that you can feel better for supporting him.]
3. In the books, the rumors of their bastardry at large halted when all of Rhaenyra's boys' cradle eggs hatched. The ONLY people who continued to try and raise issue were the core green faction. But the realm at large *did not give a fuck* why? Because every actually relevant party claimed those boys. Repeatedly and without flinching. Laenor claimed and loved those boys even face to face with Alicent's bullshit. Corlys claimed and love those boys- he was proud of them, and it's been stated by the actor in the show that Luke was his favorite- that given the... events of ep.10, Corlys will be out for blood. And Viserys repeatedly insisted upon their legitimacy- because Laenor and Corlys claimed them, because he knew that by forcing Rhaenyra to marry Laenor in order to repair the damage his insults caused House Velaryon, that he had backed her into a corner.
Rhaenyras boys are remembered to history as Velaryon. Even **Green supporters** noted that they were good, capable, intelligent, and **worthy** princes. That their deaths were unfortunate *for the realm.*
Legally, those boys are legitimate. They cannot be proven illegitimate without Laenor renouncing them, and he never did. Furthermore, trying to declare children illegitimate due to their appearance is a stupid, dangerous precedent. The fact that it's people who have no ties to House Velaryon pushing these rumors and pushing for disinheritance makes it even worse, because they're meddling in the succession of a House that *is not theirs.* if that became a standard, imagine the feuds and conflicts that would erupt- lords pushing for the children of rivals to be declared illegitimate all for the sake of trying to grasp and steal land, power, and influence as a norm? The realm would tear itself apart. Not to mention the sheer danger that would place women in, in Westeros.
Furthermore, even whilst usurping her, even while calling her children bastards, the Greens also imply Laenor's homosexuality was inherited by the Velaryon princes- that they would use Rhaenyra's 'promiscuity' and Laenor's 'predilections' to turn the Red Keep into a brothel- ironic, considering that's more what Aegon would've done. So even while claiming that Rhaenyras children are bastards that shouldn't inherit, they try to state that what the boys inherit or learn from Laenor makes them unfit for the throne. They can't keep their own damn story straight- because their usurpation was never about what is moral, what is right, or the greater good. It was about greed. Power. Sexism.
It doesn't matter what those boys looked like, especially seeing as Rhaenys had dark hair in the books. What matters is that Corlys and Laenor and Viserys claimed them and declared them legitimate, and that they **never** deviated from that.
As for Vaemond, he was a second son. And he waited until Corlys and Viserys were dying and too ill to stop him to make a grasp for power. Youre not supposed to look at that and feel hes in the right. Youre supposed to look at that and see a man consumed by greed, and literally trying to bury Corlys' will and intentions before the man is even in a grave. He was NEVER Corlys' heir- he just wanted power. It wasn't about his House, or their legacy, it was about him.
(And before yall start shit about Rhaenyras boys stealing Laena's girls' inheritance... Rhaena and Baela are *TARGARYEN*. Not Velaryon. Their claim was to the throne or to any holdings in Daemon's name. NOT to Driftmark.)
Rhaenyras boys being betrothed to Rhaena and Baela tied up any issue of 'Velaryon blood.' Baela would have been queen consort of the seven kingdoms at Jace's side, and they very clearly adored one another in book and show. Rhaena would have been Lady of the Tides- which she never would have had a chance for, without Rhaenyra (and Laena) making those betrothals. She and Luke were also canonically very close- and in show she's very encouraging of him whenever he looks nervous or uncertain. They had a bond.
Rhaenyra stole nothing. She gave those girls more. And she loved them- they were the only daughters she got to have, seeing as the Greens treachery caused the early death of baby Visenya. If she hadn't loved them, she wouldn't have trusted Rhaena to look after Joffrey or give her Morning's egg from Syrax. She wouldn't have immediately invited both girls to the table when she was queen, which is something her father did not do for her until much, much later. He allowed Rhaenyra's voice to be silenced too often when she was first made heir. Rhaenyra did not repeat that hurt to her girls or her boys.
Anyways, moving on.
You lot do also remember that Rhaenyra herself has Velaryon blood, right? Jaehaerys I's mother was Alyssa Velaryon. Aegon, Rhaenys, and Visenya the Conquerors' mother was Valaena Velaryon. It's not immediate, but there *is* Velaryon blood through *all* of Rhaenyras boys.
Ultimately, Rhaenyras boys were only in danger because of the core Green faction usurping the throne. If they hadnt- no succession crisis or rebellion could have truly threatened Rhaenyras boys- because none of them would have had dragons. All of Rhaenyras children loved one another- her sons by Daemon would not have turned on her sons with Laenor (and Harwin). They were a true, loving family- possibly one of the healthiest and most close knit one House Targaryen ever boasted.
And another thing... 'her having babies with Harwin was stupid, she should have picked someone Valyrian!'
Here's the thing. Rhaenyra had to be careful as hell choosing who would father her and Laenor's heirs. She had to choose someone who was physically close, and who could be trusted. Someone who wouldn't try to publicly claim those boys in boast or jealousy. Someone who would keep their mouth shut and had no ambition of their own in regards to the throne. Do you really think Vaemond Velaryon (as I see him suggested a lot) would've kept his mouth shut? That he wouldn't have tried to use this to blackmail Rhaenyra and Laenor for more power and status? Do you think Rhaenys would have ever fought for or supported Rhaenyra if Rhaenyra had tried to have Corlys sire her children? And flying to see Daemon in Pentos and having a purely Valyrian child 9 months later would have made things look even more suspect.
Furthermore... she chose someone who cared for her deeply. Who clearly had a positive relationship with Laenor. She chose someone so she wouldn't have to traumatize herself- she took power over her body in a way almost no Westerosi woman has ever been able to. They were a family unit- Rhaenyra, Laenor, and Harwin. Those children were loved and cherished by two fathers and their mother. They were raised never doubting their mothers love, nor their father's- either father. They were raised and educated to be true, good princes of the realm.
Rhaenyra fought like hell for her children. She was an incredible mother. Yall just believe everything the Green faction says without looking at it critically, and that's unfortunate as hell.
631 notes · View notes
sorcerersseestars · 2 months ago
Text
love sweet, taste bitter
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Gojo Satoru x gn!reader
Tumblr media
To you, Gojo Satoru is your silly, loving boyfriend. But Gojo Satoru is also the strongest sorcerer in the world, and that comes with its risks—for both you and him. When his Infinity fails to activate, your mission takes a turn for the worse.
Aka one of you gets hurt, and the other has to bear it.
Warnings: injuries and violence, a gun is used, blood loss, hidden inventory arc spoilers, fight btwn Gojo and reader, reader implied to be shorter/smaller than Gojo, slightly suggestive (not rlly), lowkey a lot of kissing tho??, bad communication skills, emotional whiplash bc gojo doesn't know what to do w his feelings
Word count: 9.2k
*Gojo and reader are in their early 20s
Tumblr media
"Cursed technique reversal: red,” Gojo calls out casually, lazily flicking his right index finger at his target.
The curse—hardly an intelligent one, far from being special-grade—stares at the brilliant light with bulging eyes. It's a deer in the headlights, transfixed by Gojo’s power and paralyzed with fear. You can only imagine how that would feel.
You tear your eyes away from the sight of the curse disintegrating into nothing. It's not as gruesome as most curse exorcisms, considering the potency of Gojo’s attacks, but the curse’s expression fading into nothingness still makes your skin crawl. You almost pity the horrible creature.
In comparison to the macabre scene you just witnessed, Gojo's enthusiastic noise of approval nearly gives you whiplash.
"Another job well done by yours truly!" Gojo grins, giving you two thumbs up. "Now let's hurry before that new boba place closes. You said you really wanted to try it, right?"
It takes you a moment to respond, your mind still processing how insanely fast your boyfriend was able to eradicate a threat that would have taken you both a good strategy and a fair bit of time to exorcise. It took practically no effort for Gojo to eliminate, and you know that he fears no curse. For you, fear grips you each time you face off with a curse, no matter how big or small. It doesn't feel fair.
Your fingers curl into a fist as you struggle with your emotions, frustrated with yourself. When you look to him, beyond his shades and into his powerful eyes, something akin to envy pulls at your gut. It makes you feel sick—you're viewing him in the way everybody else sees him. But when he walks toward you, smiling so wide that he looks goofy, your thoughts of his abilities melt away and are replaced by an affection so strong that your chest hurts.
His eyes are so beautiful, their perpetual sparkle even visible from under the dark film of his shades. His cheeks are tinged pink from your constant gaze on him, and it still amazes you that you have the ability to make him fluster at all. His lips are stretched into a toothy grin, his eyes crinkling along in genuine happiness. Your stunning boyfriend that you still can't believe ever gained an interest in plain old you.
That's right. To you, he's not the Honored One, he's not Gojo Satoru. He's just your boyfriend, just your Satoru. Just your boyfriend who is obsessed with anything sweet.
You roll your eyes lightly, a small chuckle bubbling up in your throat, “You mean, the place you've been begging to go to all week?"
He walks to your side, sighing loudly as he approaches. His deft fingers subtly adjust his sunglasses, pulling them down in an attempt to garner your sympathy. The expression on his face is priceless—the strongest sorcerer in the world is pouting because you insinuated you might not want milk tea.
"Don't be so mean, sweets!” He whines. "You said you wanted to try it out, too.”
“Hm, did I now?” You say with a mischievous glint in your eyes. “I don’t recall.”
He steps closer, towering over your smaller form. When you dwell on that thought, you suppose you should be scared. You see him brutally destroy curses, leaving no trace of their existence behind. He could do that to you, if you wanted to.
Even knowing that, you aren’t scared.
He wraps his arms around your waist, pulling you close to his chest. You can feel his strength through the solid grip he has on you—his arms lovingly cage you in.
Even though he’s done this many times before, your breath still catches in your throat, and your heart races at the proximity.
“C'mon, l know you've been craving brown sugar boba all week... And they even have that tiramisu flavor you go crazy for…”
He nuzzles in close to your neck, warm breath fanning down your nape. When he's this close, you can't resist anything—and he knows it, too.
You sigh as if he's ruffled your feathers, but you can't help but let the chuckle you’ve been holding in escape past your upturned lips.
“Do they have cheese foam?" You hum.
You yelp as his fingers dig into your side—and then your entire body is wracked with heaving, boisterous laughter.
"What a silly question. Of course they do! Only the amateurs lack the essential toppings,” He shakes his head playfully. “Any more funny business out of you, and you'll get punished again."
You twist around in his grasp to face him. Your hand reaches up to ease his sunglasses down the bridge of his nose, putting his vibrant blue eyes and pale lashes on display.
“You're so pretty it's unfair,” You pout. "Leave some for the rest of us."
"And yet everyone's always trying to steal you away from me," He counters.
"Says the head-turner," You say with a smile full of your adoration for him. “Haven't you noticed that the rest of the population—myself included—never has all eyes on them when entering a room?"
He shrugs, “How would I know? You think my eyes are on anyone else once I see you?"
The insinuation has heat and electricity coursing through your entire body. He wears a smirk as if he can feel the flames licking your skin. You lower your gaze, suddenly shy.
A warm hand cups your check, gently nudging your face close to his. Your eyes instinctively flit up to his, drinking him in.
His eyes are bright behind his shades. You laugh softly when his shades fully slide down to the edge of his nose as he lowers his head to yours.
“Makin’ fun of me, babycakes?” He pretends to pout, but his tone is playful and warm.
“Maybe,” You tease. “I mean, you are freakishly tall and have glow in the dark eyes. And you call me all sorts of weird names.”
“You–!” He gasps. “You are such a rascal, y’know that? A fiend, even!”
“Mmm,” You hum, humoring him. “Well, would such a fiend as myself do…this?”
You lean in, savoring the warmth of his hands on you. His skin, smooth from its lack of wear due to his Infinity, skates across your skin effortlessly. Your lips are about to touch his, only inches away from bliss, when you both are caught off guard.
There’s a loud bang. So loud, in fact, that your ears ring as soon as the sound waves hit your eardrums. You stagger back from Gojo, crouching down and immediately covering your ears with your hands. You look up at your boyfriend, expecting to exchange confused glances, and are not prepared in the slightest for the scene in front of you.
His eyes are blown wide, shades now missing. Beads of sweat begin to form on his forehead and all color has drained from his face. His expression quickly crumples, lips parting and yet no sound escapes him.
A shudder runs through you—something is very wrong.
Then his shaky hands begin to move, and he quickly clutches his side. Right under his ribs, a stream of blood begins to run down his body, escaping between his fingers. You watch in horror as it pours down at an alarming rate, and you begin to put the pieces together.
Satoru has been shot.
His name leaves your mouth in a panicked howl and then you can't speak anymore, as if all the air has escaped from your lungs. Your mind is ripped back to when Toji Fushiguro sliced Gojo to shreds in front of you. His blood splattering everywhere while you watched on in horror, immobilized and completely useless, not able to do anything but watch the terrors unfold. Not again, not again, it can’t happen again, is what replays through your mind.
You have no more time to linger on that chilling memory. More pops sound through the air, deafening you and spiking fear in the blood that rushes through your veins. It can't happen again. You can't see him like that again.
You immediately throw yourself at your boyfriend, desperately trying to shield him with your body, even though it’s nearly impossible with how tall he is. You shove him down, attempting to cut down his frame to meet yours so that you can cover him, and notice something odd. You can still feel his warmth—your skin brushes against his, when it shouldn’t. Not right now, it shouldn’t.
You move to the side with quick steps and try to pull him along with you, but are unable to. Your heart sinks. He’s completely dead weight. You’re strong in your own regard, but there’s no way you can pick him up and take off with him.
"Satoru, please! C'mon, we have to go, we need to. Please," You plead with him, gripping him so tightly that your hands ache. When he doesn't respond, you start to shake him, trying to get any reaction out of him, but to no avail.
He’s in shock. It’s obvious with his lack of reaction, with how he lets himself be man handled under your body. He prides himself in his ability to protect those around him—he wouldn’t just let you put yourself in the line of fire if he was in his right mind. You know fully well that Gojo could eliminate the shooter in mere moments if he assumed his normal calm and nonchalance—but, unfortunately, his mind is in a freeze state. The bare skin under your fingertips is evidence of this, which only exacerbates your rising panic.
“Your Infinity!” You shout, your voice raw from panic. “Satoru, your Infinity! You need to turn it on! Now!”
Still grasping Satoru tightly, you endure the next round that is emptied into the space next to you—a bullet whistles by your ear, too close for comfort. Gojo’s breathing is ragged, his eyes staring into nothing and appearing so far away at the same time.
You duck down to his eye level and grab his chin, forcing him to look into your eyes. “Satoru, please! Snap out of it! Please!”
For a few seconds, his gaze locks with yours. His eyes, usually such a vivid blue, are darkened by how large his pupils are. You plead with him, unable to keep your terrified tears at bay.
Then you’re slightly bumped back, now pressing against what feels like a wall, and your body becomes weak with relief. He finally activated his Infinity.
But you're not out of danger yet. Your brain scrambles as you try to figure out how to get out of this while your boyfriend is evidently in shock.
You dare a glance back, eyes scouring the landscape, and immediately curse. As you suspected, you are most definitely being sniped. The enemy has the advantage of higher ground and generous foliage for coverage, while you and Satoru are exposed out in the open clearing below. If you had more time and brain power, you could triangulate their location, but that's just not possible right now.
Even if you were able to surmise their location, you don't even think you can fight back right now, not with how exposed your position is and with how vulnerable Gojo is in this state. And if you can't fight, then you have to flee.
Projectile weapons are ineffective against a moving target—this simple knowledge is what sways your decision. Even though it didn’t work before, you grab Satoru, still trying to keep him low, and begin to run. You breathe a little easier when he moves along with you.
More shots whizz past you, but you keep going, pumping your legs as fast as you can while making sure to be the rear guard. It’s obvious that they’re targeting Gojo—if they hit you, it would merely be collateral damage. The bullseye is on Gojo’s back, not yours.
You don’t stop running until you hit the tree line, and even then you hurriedly usher Gojo behind a stocky trunk many meters back. Before you can catch your breath, you're ripping off your jacket with haste. Quickly realizing that the material is not ideal for the job you intend it for, you quickly tear your shirt from your body. It’s sweaty from all your activity, but it’ll have to do.
You brush away Gojo’s hands, firmly pressing the cloth to his wound. You practically collapse onto your boyfriend as you apply firm pressure, your forehead dipping down to rest on his shoulder. You're wracking your brain for what to do next when Gojo gently pushes you back, places his hands on yours, and shakes his head.
You can't help but think the worst. What does that mean? Is it like that time? Am I too late again?
“I'm sorry, I know it hurts, but y-you're bleeding so much that I have to. Fuck, I’m really sorry for making you run, I’m sure that made it worse, but we just had to get away from whoever was shooting, oh god, how badly did they get you, fuck, this is my fault–”
You don’t realize you’re rambling until he cuts you off. You don't realize you're crying until he brushes the tears away.
“Hey. Stop, sweets. I’m fine, it already stopped bleeding.”
“What? But that can’t be, you were literally shot–”
He raises his shirt, revealing a pink layer of new skin.
He offers you a weak smile, but something is off about it. “Reverse cursed technique, remember? Nobody’s gonna take me down that easily.”
You release a big breath you didn’t realize you’d been holding. The weight on your shoulders finally eases as you look over his new layer of skin.
“Oh fuck, I’m so glad you’re okay,” You sniffle, leaning in quickly for a hug. “I–mmph!”
You stumble back a step, blinking in surprise. This has never happened before—you hit his invisible barrier.
His eyes widen. “Fuck, sorry, I didn’t mean to–“
“No, no, it’s okay!” You wave your hands, trying to dispel his apology. You feel flustered and stiff, awkwardness seeping into your mannerisms. “It’s good that it’s on now.”
It’s then that the disturbing thought hits you. Maybe he should always have his Infinity on. Maybe you’re endangering him.
Gojo holds out his arms for you, now inviting you in. You pause, your thoughts echoing through your head. You take a beat too long—you know he senses your momentary hesitation, and how slowly and gingerly you come into his arms doesn't feel right.
“You okay? Did you get hit?” He asks, squeezing you tightly in his arms. “Fuck, please tell me you didn’t.”
With your head pressed to his chest, you can hear how rapidly his heart beats. He’s scared. He’s scared for you, even though he was the one who got hurt.
His hands run over you, checking for any injuries. You pull yourself out of his embrace gently to still his hands.
You shake your head, “No, I’m fine. But you…you got hurt, Satoru. They shot you.”
And it’s absolutely your fault. If you hadn’t been touching him, this never would have happened. He let his guard down because of you.
“I’m alright now, sweets,” He reassures you, but his tone is again tinged with a strange emotion you can’t put your finger on. “Promise.”
“But–!” You exclaim, about to spill out all of your guilty feelings. The words don’t come, though, stopped by another fear. Will he also realize it’s your fault and get rid of you? Will he realize he doesn’t need you?
“Here,” He says, unballing your shirt and placing it in your hands. “This is proof that I’m fine. Your shirt’s..."
He inspects it funnily, scrunching up his eyebrows and staring at it intently, making a show of it to make you laugh. "...pretty clean and ready to be worn again. Well, unless you don’t want to…can’t say I wouldn’t mind you not putting it back on…there is a little speck of blood on it, after all...”
He smiles at you, a true grin that manages to lift up your weary heart. You burst out laughing, and swat his arm before you hurriedly take it from his hands.
“Satoru! We almost just died and you—” You still can’t contain your laughter, but it stops abruptly once you feel a large wet patch on your shirt. When you pull your hand back, your fingers are stained red with a surprising amount of blood.
“I swear it closed up before you…” He frowns, trailing off. His face turns serious for a moment, but then you touch his cheek with your clean hand and give him a quick peck.
You shrug, “It’s okay. No biggie.”
Face still close to yours, he chases your lips as you pull away from the peck. He kisses you deeply, catching you by surprise and forcing you to hold onto him for support.
"Satoru! I'm gonna get you all bloody with this hand..." You softly protest.
"Don't care," He murmurs quickly, leaning in again and kissing like you don't need to breathe. "It's mine anyway. Just like you."
"Mmph—Satoru—but you need to get looked at properly," You manage to say. "We have to go."
He reluctantly lets you slip out of his arms, sighing as he straightens to his full height.
He groans loudly, frowning at you, "Party pooper!"
"Yeah, yeah, get yourself ready," You fold your arms, acting like you didn't just immensely enjoy that.
He raises an eyebrow at you and smirks as his eyes scan your body.
"What?" You ask petulantly.
He sounds more excited than you’d like, “So…no more shirt?”
You sigh, exasperated, and quickly smooth the shirt back over your body. He laughs and wraps himself around your smaller form, squishing you back against his chest. You relax against him, digging your nose into him, taking in his comforting scent. You both are silent for a few moments, soaking up each other's presence.
“That was scary,” You whisper.
Gojo sighs, “It was pathetic, that’s what it was.”
You snap your head up to look at him. “Hey. What are you saying?”
He shakes his head, looking frustrated. “Doesn’t matter. Let’s just…let’s just head back.”
“Satoru…” You start with a warning tone.
“Don’t wanna talk about it right now,” He says flatly. “Besides, we should go back and see Shoko just in case. I want you to get looked over, too."
You want to question him further, but hold your tongue. You know better than to press him when he’s like this.
“Huh? Why’s that?” You simply ask instead, genuinely confused.
He frowns as he looks at your head, scrutinizing it as if something was wrong. Before you can question him, he forms a fist and–
Knock, knock.
“You think it’s in there?” He asks seriously. “Sounds pretty hollow.”
Your jaw drops in disbelief at the absolute disrespect. There’s no way he just knocked on your skull to check if your brain is still in your head.
“GOJO SATORU! Are you- are you implying I don’t have a BRAIN?!” You screech, taking hold of his sorcerer jacket to jostle him around. “Do you have a death wish?!”
He laughs, then uses the same fist to roughly rub your scalp. He even gave you a fucking noogie!!
“That’s it! Take me to Shoko.” You pout, crossing your arms and turning around so your back faces Gojo.
“Aww, sweets, you want a second opinion?” He coos, moving forward to wrap his arms around you from behind. “I’m sure she’ll be able to confirm it…”
“Ugh!”
"...with how willingly you throw yourself into danger."
You stop smiling. "What?"
He's not smiling either, and its absence looks strange on his face. His gaze is almost cold. "Don't do that again."
There are no words that come to your mind, but you wish you could protest and justify your actions and convince him that it was necessary. Instead, you stand there dumbly, transfixed by his cold aura.
Then he smiles sweetly again, as if that hadn't just happened. "Let's go, shall we?"
Tumblr media
Shoko sighs loudly at your arrival. "What was it this time?"
"Actually, we're not sure," You admit, looking to Gojo to see if he has any possible answers. When he says nothing, you continue, "We didn't see what—or rather who–it was. 'Must have been a cursed user."
"Even Mr. Six Eyes didn't see them?" Shoko asks, raising an eyebrow. "That's hard to believe. And here I was always thinking he should leave some eyes for the rest of us."
She looks to Gojo teasingly, but he doesn't take the bait. Shoko looks to you with a questioning gaze that says something like—what's up with him?
"It's complicated..." You supply vaguely.
"Well, whoever it was must be bad news," She says. "How did they get Gojo if you couldn't see them?"
"They had guns," You explain. "It was a sniper...or a few snipers, I'm not sure if it was just one or if there was another one too. Their aim wasn't the best, but they got Satoru one time...they shot a few rounds at us, but I guess they got lucky with that shot."
You can't look at him. If you look at him, you'll see his skin pale and washed out from the blood dripping down his abdomen. You'll see his body lacerated and unrecognizable from Toji's ruthless assault. You are always useless, hopelessly useless.
You look at your feet instead and ignore the sour taste of bile in your mouth.
Gojo's cocky snicker brings you back to attention, "They were pretty terrible. They only got one hit, but they should have known better. As if that loser shit would work against me."
Shoko's eyes are on you again, and you know why. Gojo doesn't normally get injured. And by someone with nothing more than a gun? How could he even get hit with Infinity?
Even if you were speaking, you're not sure you would have the strength to tell her. It's my fault he didn't have his Infinity on, is the answer that resonates painfully in your chest. The guilt threatens to consume you whole, but you push it down.
"Everything is 'loser shit' to you with RCT," Shoko decides on. "But I have to say I'm just a little surprised you got hit."
"Yeah, yeah, but I'm all good now," Gojo says dismissively.
"Let me see at least," Shoko rolls her eyes. "Aren't you here to see me for my medical expertise or what?"
"What, we can't see our dear friend otherwise?" You tease with a pout. "You wound me, Shoko."
"That wouldn't be ethical of me,” Shoko plays along, then turns back to doctor mode once she starts getting her supplies ready. "Did you get hurt too?"
“No, just Satoru,” You say with a shake of your head. “You don’t have to check me over.”
She narrows her eyes at you. “I’ll come back to you.”
“Huh? But Shoko…” You trail off, seeing she has already begun inspecting Gojo.
“I’m all good,” Gojo rolls his eyes, but it doesn’t have quite the usual touch of playfulness it usually does. “C’mon, Shoko, don’t waste your time on this. We both know I can’t really get hurt.”
He winks at you, and you smile in return. That almost makes you feel better—he’s being more like himself.
“Uh-huh, but they certainly won’t let me rest until I do a proper check-up,” Shoko says. “You’ve got a persistent one, did ya know?”
He only chuckles at that, giving her some peace to look him over and prod him here or there.
“Well, you’re all good, as expected. It doesn’t seem like there’s any soreness, which is a good sign.”
“My RCT isn’t just for show!” Gojo says proudly. “Works just as good as yours, Shoko.”
She rolls her eyes, “Uh huh. Now, let’s get on to your ‘sweets’.”
You stick your tongue out at her, blushing, “Shoko, I have a name!”
“Not in these parts,” She teases easily, waggling her eyebrows at you. “Alright, just sit up straight for me now. Just gonna prod you a bit, okay?”
You nod, unworried as you let her hands inspect you. You relax and are about to crack a joke about getting a free massage from bestie Shoko, but you find yourself writhing in pain instead. You definitely didn’t expect yourself to wince—and yet you find yourself doing so, hissing out in pain as a stinging suddenly surfaces on your back.
Gojo sits up in alarm at your reaction and quickly jumps up from his cot, making his way over to you and Shoko. “What’s wrong?”
He’s practically hovering over you before Shoko shoos him away with a wave of her hand, motioning for him to let her do her job. He keeps away, but his gaze is trained on the spot her hand is touching.
She lifts your shirt fully, carefully inspecting the wound. It’s bleeding steadily, yet neither of you even noticed it before this moment.
“You got hit?” Gojo practically mewls. He’s never sounded this small and weak before. “But you were—I thought you were fine..."
Now it makes sense why your hand was tinged red when you pulled your hand back from the shirt earlier. It wasn't from Satoru's wound at all—it's your blood.
When you turn to Satoru, you look into a mirror. You know that's how you must have looked earlier when you looked at his bullet wound in horror.
“You probably didn’t feel it because of the adrenaline," You hear Shoko telling you. "It appears to be a graze, but it got you pretty good. There’s no bullet or shrapnel, which might be why you didn’t feel it in the moment.”
You feel embarrassed for some reason. “I seriously didn’t feel anything…it’s fine, then, right?”
Satoru is pale again. Emotions swirl in his agitated eyes—you can’t quite decipher them, since they cycle so fast, but he looks…haunted.
But he shouldn't, not when everything boils down to being your fault.
You immediately turn your attention to Satoru, becoming apprehensive about the look in his eyes. You smile at him softly, eyes crinkling along with your lips, trying to signal that you’re really okay, that there’s nothing to worry about.
But you don’t see the pool of blood steadily growing behind you, Satoru does.
“I’m okay, Satoru,” You smile, but it falters when Shoko presses gauze against your wound.
“Let me be the judge of that,” Shoko sighs. “Lay on your stomach and try not to move too much. I'm going to wrap you, okay? I need to grab some things, but I’ll be right back.”
"Okay..." You accept softly, still surprised by this turn of events.
You obey Shoko's orders and begin to lower yourself onto the hospital bed. You grit your teeth when the skin on your back stretches, irritating your newly discovered wound. You blink once and suddenly he's by your side, holding you steady and angling you so your back doesn't have movement while he gently lays you down.
"Thanks," You say. "I'm fine though, Satoru, really..."
“You don’t see yourself,” He speaks lowly, quietly. “Worry about yourself some.”
You’re left reeling at his words—more so by how he says them. His voice is so weak, uncharacteristically soft and completely candid.
“I’m fine,” You insist, shaking your head. “I didn’t even feel it. It can’t be so bad then, can it?”
You don’t miss the way Gojo’s jaw sets. He didn’t like that response. You see something you don't understand in his eyes, a flash of a strong emotion you didn’t anticipate. You avert your gaze, but it’s burned into the back of your eyes.
The click of Shoko’s heels alerts you of her return. Gojo watches his old friend carefully, taking in her furrowed brow and the way her eyes jump between your wound and her supplies, analyzing. She seems confused, as if she underestimated the severity of your wound. His hands curls into fists, watching your blood drip over the edge of the bed and dropping messily onto the ground below.
Shoko pulls her gloves on swiftly, grabbing a bottle of antiseptic and preparing it for application.
“Sit tight, my friend,” Shoko tells you with a deep exhale. “I gotta get started on this. First I’m going to sterilize it, then you’re going to need stitches. I’m sorry to say we won’t have the luxury of time to sedate you for that.”
You gulp. Your pain tolerance is okay, but you really hate the feeling of anticipating pain. Knowing something will hurt is infinitely more scary to you than getting injured in battle, when your adrenaline is high and it just happens without warning.
You reach your hand out hesitantly, feeling silly for needing comfort just for a few stitches, and are surprised by the immediate grasp on your hand. It’s tight but not uncomfortable; it’s warm and it grounds you.
You grit your teeth and try to limit your whimpers of pain as she treats your wound. You can’t stop yourself from squirming when the needles pulls at your skin again and again, even when she places a heavy hand on your back to hold you in place. All throughout, Gojo’s hand squeezes yours, carrying you through this uncomfortable ordeal.
When it’s finally over, you feel exhausted.
“You did great,” Shoko praises you. “Your wound should be all good for now.”
You let out a small chuckle of relief, almost giddy to be done with the dreaded stitches. You sit up and slide off the bed, wanting to get back on your feet to feel some normalcy, to convince yourself you’re fine.
You truly felt nothing before, but it must be catching up to you now. Your knees threaten to buckle under you as dizziness overtakes you—you wobble on your two feet.
Both Shoko and Gojo rush to you, each taking a side to support you.
“You lost a considerable amount of blood,” Shoko warns in her doctorly tone. “Slow down and take it easy from now on.”
You laugh sheepishly, rubbing the back of your head, “I’m good! Just stood up a bit too fast.”
Shoko releases your arm, but Gojo doesn’t let go. He holds you steady, even pulling you toward him, supporting the majority of your weight.
“I can stand, y’know…” You laugh softly, finding his overprotective actions a bit amusing. But all the humor drains from the situation when you meet his gaze.
You see it in his eyes again, a dark flicker that almost makes you nervous. Before you can muster the courage to question him about it, Shoko interrupts your silent musings.
“Listen closely. I know you like to be up and about, as you just demonstrated, but I want you to limit your movement as to not disturb your stitches. A little walking should be fine, but do not exert yourself. No exercising or training for the next few days. Come see me in three days so I can clear you—if it’s looking good—for activity.”
You resist a sigh, settling on a playful roll of your eyes. “Yes, mom.”
She smirks, “Good. Now get out of here, you two, before I get your couples cooties.”
“Har, har, har,” You pretend to laugh, before sticking your tongue out at her. “Very funny, Shoko.”
It strikes you that Gojo has been unusually quiet, not joining in on your mutual jokes. When you spare a glance, you observe that his facial expression is neutral, if a bit strained. No smile, no cocky smirk. That’s uncommon.
You look at Shoko, exchanging more unspoken words with a few blinks. That confirms it—he’s acting strange.
You want to ask him what’s wrong, but he know he won’t tell you here.
“Ready to go?” You ask instead.
“Ready as ever,” He tries a half smile. It’s not very convincing.
You nod and lean into him, angling your head to smile up at him. Your smile is innocent and sweet. His chest squeezes at the sight, full of a jumble of emotions. He doesn’t reveal any of them; he absently plays with a strand of your hair instead.
As you look up at him, closely examining his soulful eyes for any traces of the emotion from earlier, to see if it still lingered. But the intense emotion is gone, replaced by an even and controlled gaze, leaving you to only wonder at the clear flash of anger you saw earlier in his bright eyes.
Tumblr media
When you come back home, Gojo is unusually quiet. He mumbles something about taking a shower when you get back, leaving your side as soon as he gets the chance. You really wouldn't mind, but he seems rather... avoidant, especially with his ensuing actions.
You plop yourself down on your couch, trying to get comfy while keeping your back straight, a nearly impossible feat. Feeling restless, you tap your foot while you watch condensation from a glass on the coffee table in front of you drip down the sides. With each drop that falls, your heart beats a little faster.
You prepared a cool glass of water and a bowl of Satoru’s favorite sweets for when he's done, anticipating a binge of a show you both recently discovered. But, instead of an evening full of your usual snuggles on the couch, him getting handsy while you ‘protest’ about missing the show, you are woken up to a different reality.
When you hear the click of the bathroom door, you straighten in your seat, excited to be close to him again. But before you can even call him over to the couch, Gojo heads straight to your bedroom. You wait a few minutes, assuming he's just changing, but you grow uneasy as the time ticks by.
Maybe he just wants space. Well, how long should you give him? Should you ask him if he wants space? But what if he's waiting for you? Does he just want to be in bed instead?
You wait and wait, tapping your foot anxiously on the floor and checking your phone every few minutes. When the supposed appropriate amount of time has passed, you hesitantly approach the bedroom.
You find yourself knocking on the door before you enter, even though you've never done that to your shared door before.
"Hey, Satoru?" You call out tentatively.
You stand in the doorway, scared to cross an invisible boundary. A sheepish smile is on your face, even though you try to get your lips to stretch normally.
He's on his phone, just scrolling. Oh, maybe he just got distracted by TikTok or something.
"Hm?" He barely responds, not even looking up.
“Is something bothering you?” You ask, worried. “Is it your side?”
“Why would it be my side?” Gojo asks flatly.
Your brow creases in confusion, but you try to keep a light tone. “Oh. Uh, what’s wrong, then?”
"Nothing, why would anything be wrong?" He gives you a tight-lipped smile. His tone is so strange—bordering on sarcastic—and you don’t know what to make of it. As he stands up and passes you, slipping out of the room hastily like you are what’s bothering him. The thought turns your stomach.
You pause for a beat, frozen in the doorway as you process what just happened. Then you turn around, eyes following his form as he enters the living room and unceremoniously sprawls across the couch. He crunches on some candy you brought in the bowl.
Okay. Maybe you should be more direct.
You walk over to him, cautious but trying not to appear nervous, “Satoru, can we talk?”
“We are talking,” He smiles oddly.
“You know what I mean…” You say with a note of annoyance coming through in your tone, then it turns softer. “Is something wrong? Did I do something?”
“Yes.”
You blink rapidly, surprised by his blunt answer. You take a seat next to him.
“Okay…could you tell me what I did?”
“…”
He’s not faking a smile anymore, which is a start. His lips are set in a firm, flat line, instead. His jaw is clenched and his neck muscles are emphasized due to how taut they are; you have rarely seen him tense like this. Your chest aches—what did you do?
“Please, Satoru, what’s wrong?” You ask again, each word filled with care and concern. And somehow, it seems to kill him.
“What’s wrong?” He echoes back loudly. “What’s wrong is that you stood in front of me while there was incoming fire! You can’t just do that.”
That’s not what you expected.
“What do you mean?” You frown.
“I just– fuck, why would you think to do that?” He stresses, pulling at his hair. “You took too much risk—you can’t use RCT!”
“Yeah, me and like ninety-nine percent of all sorcerers. Like it matters. You think I thought of that?” You huff.
“‘Like it matters?’ Are you hearing yourself right now?” He scoffs. “It matters a lot, and you know it does. It’s reckless.”
“When it comes to you, it doesn’t.” You say hotly, unwavering.
“It does matter. You got hurt when you shouldn’t have. When you didn’t need to!”
You’re surprised by his outburst. “I–I was only thinking about protecting you, okay? I wasn’t…I wasn’t thinking about that! Caring about getting hurt? That was the last thing on my mind.”
“Yeah, it’s obvious you weren’t thinking,” He sneers. “There’s no need to risk your life like that. Absolutely no need.”
Your jaw drops in shock, and you try not to feel hurt. “You can’t be serious right now, Gojo. You were in no state to protect yourself. I was…doing my best, I just wanted to keep you safe.”
“I still got shot,” He argues back immediately, painfully reminding you.
A small, pained gasp escapes you. You spin around as fast as you can—tears are freely falling without your permission.
You want to tell him that’s not fair, but you don’t trust your vocal cords right now. Not with how tight your throat is from trying to hold back sobs that would surely wrack your body if you let them.
The guilt that has been trailing you all day now collects at the pit of your stomach, practically eating you alive. You feel physically sick. He’s right. He did get shot. He was vulnerable, his Infinity lowered because of you. If…if the bullet had gone through his head, what could you have done then?
You stand up as steadily as you can. You don’t spare him a single glance; you can’t, not with your face crumpling as you try your hardest not to cry. You exit the living room swiftly, holding it all in, all of your emotional pain but also your physical pain. Your wound is throbbing and it even feels hard to stay standing right now.
You finally round the corner into the hallway. Now out of view, you let yourself stagger down the hallway, succumbing to your dizziness. It’s your fault, your fault, only your fault. You can’t handle this right now.
You walk aimlessly down the hall, just wanting to get away from him right now. You wind up in the bathroom and lock the door behind you. You stand in front of the mirror, looking for something redeeming within yourself, but all you can see are your pathetic tears and guilt swimming in your eyes.
You grip the edge of the counter, so tightly that it begins to hurt and your fingers tremble at the effort. You feel unsteady, like the brain Gojo teased you don’t have is lacking oxygen. Maybe you really lack one if you think you could possibly be the right match for the strongest.
You sink to the ground, finally releasing heaving sobs that have been trying to claw themselves out of you. They’re muffled by your hands, which you press firmly against your mouth in an effort to contain your noises, but some of the sound leaks between your fingers. You stuff some of your shirt into your mouth to bite down on, trying to hold it all in, trying to hold yourself together.
Your breath hitches at a throb of pain from deep within your back. It hurts so much, even with the pain reliever Shoko gave you to take. It hurts more than when she was threading the needle between your folds of skin; it’s deeper than that, sharp and intense and robbing you of a normal breathing pattern.
Despite your efforts to keep quiet, pained whimpers start to leave you. And worse—panic floods you, taking advantage of your poor state of mind. All you can focus on is the stabbing pain that refuses to dull.
You rip off the gauze with shaking hands, terrified to see its state. But confusion fills you when there's only dried smears on it—that must be from earlier. If your wound is still closed, then why does it hurt so much?
You shift on the floor, limbs giving out. You contort in pain, which only makes things worse, pulling the stitches to their limits. They stay intact, but the tension brings waves of pain to your back. A yelp is ripped from your throat at a particularly painful pulse.
The thunder of incoming footsteps gives you both fear and a sense of relief. On one hand, you didn’t want him to hear; on another hand, right now all you crave is your boyfriend’s comfort.
“Hey, what was that?” He asks from behind the door, sounding on edge.
“Satoru…” You mewl out in pain.
He calls out your name, voice now urgent. You cringe at the resistance of the lock against his attempt at opening the door.
“M’sorry, I locked it,” You sniffle. “Stupid of me.”
But he still appears in front of you, a locked door holding nothing to his defiance of space and time. He takes one glance at your crumpled form on the floor and curses. All of the tension from earlier melts away, replaced by genuine worry and need.
“What happened? You okay? Did you fall?” He asks as he hurriedly crouches next to you. His hands reach out to you, gently pulling you into his lap. You wince as your back bends, aggravating your wound.
You shake your head. “No, it’s just—agh, fuck—just my back, it suddenly hurts so bad.”
He grimaces. “Can…can I take a look?”
You give your consent and he quickly peels your shirt up. His fingers shake as he does so, even though he doesn’t mind the sight of injuries or blood. Or, at least, when it’s not yours.
He slowly pulls your shirt up just enough to reveal your wound, fearing the worst. You shiver when the fabric chafes against your graze, and he murmurs an apology upon seeing your discomfort. One of his hands rubs soothing circles on your waist.
When he inspects your injury, he’s met with red, puffy skin—the area around your stitches is clearly inflamed, but not unsually so. He breathes a low sigh of relief.
“It looks a bit swollen,” He determines before pulling your shirt back down, careful not to let it touch your wound this time. “But not too bad.”
“It feels bad,” You whine.
"I know," He says gently. “I’ll call Shoko in a second to make sure it's alright. Do you want to head to the bed first?"
“Yes, please,” You request softly.
He hooks an arm under your knees, the other cradling your back. “Alright, sweets. Up we go."
He handles your weight like it’s nothing, and easily unlocks the door you stupidly locked on the way out.
Unshed tears prick your eyes. You couldn’t carry him earlier, even after he had been shot and couldn’t move. You are incapable, unable to handle what he can on a daily basis. Can your relationship really be mutual if he always has to act as the strongest? You could barely protect him earlier.
"It hurts that badly?" He references your teary eyes without mockery, only softness.
If only your tears were from that pain.
"It could be worse, I guess," is what you settle on, neither a lie nor the full truth.
"Could I make it better, maybe?" He asks with a suspicious smile. Before you can answer, he swings you around a few times like he normally would when he carries you, which draws a genuine laugh out of you.
"You're gonna make me dizzy!" You complain, but your smile is so pure and wide, something Gojo doesn't miss.
"You're so beautiful, sweets," He says, affectionately rubbing his nose against yours. You feel warm from the closeness.
You look away shyly, "Yeah, right."
"You don't believe me?" He asks huskily, placing a kiss on your cheek.
"Ugh! Put me down and call Shoko already! It stills hurts," You pout.
"If you say so," He says, but his little smirk is still planted on his face. He lays you down carefully, gently releasing you onto the pile of blankets.
He then turns around and dials the doctor in question, "Yo, Shoko."
You close your eyes, trying to ward off the radiating pain with deep breaths. Gojo's phone call turns to background noise, the words indecipherable.
You tune back into the world at the end of his conversation.
"Okay, thank you so much Ieiri."
You faintly hear Shoko's disgust on the other end of the line, "What's going on with you?? Please never thank me like that again, yuck!"
You can't hold back the giggle that bubbles up at Shoko's reaction. Gojo blows a raspberry into the speaker and promptly hangs up on her.
"What's the verdict?" You ask.
"Well, sweets," Gojo sing-songs. "Did you forget to do something?"
You look up in thought, your brows furrowing, "I don't think so..."
"Really?" He says, then produces a familiar orange pill container. You're forced to stare at it as he shakes it in front of your face. "What about this, hm?"
"What? I already took one," You say, a little indignantly. "When we first got home. It was so horrible tasting and was a giant horse pill, too...Ugh, get that bottle away from me, might as well throw it out. I don't want to take anymore later."
He cracks the bottle open, pouring one into his palm. You narrow your eyes at him. Before you can ask what he intends to do with it, that same pill is shoved into your mouth followed by an amount of water so large that you almost begin to choke.
You cough on the water, and he pats your back accordingly, as if he expected this.
"What-?! Are you trying to waterboard me? I said I already took one, and-" You cough again. "God, where did you even get that water from anyway?"
"Mm. But you didn't notice the pill this time, right?" He looks satisfied with himself.
You deadpan. "No, but-"
"Besides, you were spacing out before we left the infirmary. Shoko specifically said to take two pills when you came home, or else the pain might get bad."
Your face feels hot, "Oh, did she now? Hah hah...I must have misheard her..."
He sighs, and it's only now you notice how tired he looks. There's a lull in your conversation, and you use this time to truly observe him. Dark circles are prominent under his eyes—how come you never noticed that?—and his eyes hold a look of defeat.
He breaks the silence, speaking softly, "You worry me, y'know? When I came in and you were convulsing on the floor...I don't want to see you like that again."
You stay silent, not willing to risk jeopardizing this rare moment of complete and utter vulnerability from Gojo.
"And when Shoko lifted your shirt and there was so much blood pouring out of your back..." He closes his eyes, screwing them shut. "I didn't know what would happen. That really scared me. Even when Shoko said you'd be fine, I didn't believe her until it stopped. And even then, you looked so weak...you still do, and it kills me."
He looks down at the ground, between his hands that are interlocked so tightly that it looks like it would hurt.
"It fucking kills me inside that you got hurt protecting me, and you didn't even notice. If that bullet had come any closer, you-"
He stops abruptly, voice breaking. You reach forward, taking his large hands in yours.
"But it didn't. Look at me, Satoru. I'm fine, I really am. I promise."
He shakes his head vehemently, and you're shocked to see liquid trickle down his face. You almost startle when he embraces you so tightly that you can barely breathe, as if you could disappear at any moment. His head rests on your shoulder, effectively hiding his expression from view.
He whispers by your ear, "What's the use in being the strongest when I freeze up like that? I put you in so much fucking danger."
"Satoru, look at me," You ask again, but his head stays tucked in the crevice between your shoulder and collarbone. "Please."
He slowly raises his head, revealing the expression he tried to conceal. His eyes are glassy and his cheeks are tinged pink; it makes your heart hurt.
"You're not the strongest to me," You say. "You're not even Gojo Satoru. To me, you're Satoru. Just Satoru. You're human and have emotions and memories and trauma, just like everyone else."
You steel yourself for your next words, the ones that have been haunting your thoughts since he got shot.
"I know that what happened reminded you of that...that time with Toji. I-it felt the same for me, and this time...this time I couldn't stand to watch idly. I would rather die than watch that happen to you again. Especially since, this time, it was definitely my fault."
"Your fault?" He laughs dryly.
"Yes!" You instantly cry out, causing his eyes to widen.
"Haven't you realized by now?" You practically sob. "None of this would have happened if I hadn't been touching you. Because your Infinity lowered for me—fuck, it makes me sick saying this out loud—they were able to really hurt you. I'm the one endangering you, and i-if this keeps up then..."
He says nothing. Now that you admitted it, there's no taking it back. And there's no way that he can or should accept this. There's no way he should accept you, you who are so useless and weak and stubborn. And yet...
"That's all?" He says seriously. You're struck with a flash of frustration and anger at his dismissal, but the hard look in his eyes tells you he is just as frustrated and will not budge on this point.
"We'll be more careful. It's a lesson learned for sure, but I'm not giving you up anytime soon. That's what you wanted me to say, isn't it? That I was going to let you go."
You look down shamefully, "W-well..."
He barks out a sharp laugh, "That's not happening. Do you know why?"
You avoid his gaze, and your voice comes out small. "You pity me?"
"I love you." His voice is firm and so sure; it leaves no room for doubt.
Your eyes snap back to his. There’s no bandages or glasses in the way to obscure the emotion shimmering in them—an endless sea of affection and intensity and something else that you couldn’t capture in words even if you tried. Love.
He loves you.
“I love you, so you can’t be reckless. You just can’t, okay? I’ve been going crazy knowing you got hurt, but I couldn’t handle it if…” He takes a sharp breath. “It’s selfish of me, but I don’t fucking care. Nothing can happen to you. I’ll take all of your hits and all of your missions if it means you’ll be safe. You’re the one person I can’t handle losing.”
“Then you’ll understand I feel the same way,” You say with a determined look on your face. “It’s not like I planned to do what I did. It was all instinct. I didn’t care what would happen to me.”
“That’s exactly what I’m afraid of,” He admits, voice raw and so unlike his usual self-assured tone. “You don’t value yourself enough. You matter so much, sweets, more than I could ever say in words. I’d do anything for you, to keep you safe.”
You counter, “And I would die for you, Satoru, because I love you. And I wouldn’t ever regret it.”
Your determined admission renders him silent.
Then he chuckles, “You’re stubborn, aren’t you, sweets? Of course you sound all cute and mad the first time you tell me you love me.”
Your eye twitches, but you exhale into a smile. “Maybe. But so are you!”
“How about this?” He proposes. “How about we both stay alive, live happily ever after, and drink boba and eat kikufuku for the rest of our days?”
“I think I know where this is going,” You say, suspicion clear in your voice. But you can’t stop the way your heart jumps at his words, the insinuation of spending the rest of your days with Satoru making you weak inside.
“Well, sweets, I have an idea,” He says softly, but his words are filled with excitement.
“Hmm?” You muse, playing along. “What is it?”
“I think we need a sweet treat to make us feel better. Don’t you think so? Maybe we could…check out that boba place I talked about earlier?”
“The one ‘I’ said I wanted to go to?” You ask, using air quotes and shaking your head in amusement.
“That’s the one!” He grins, throwing himself around your form. He squeezes you tightly, nuzzling into your neck. “I love you so much that I’ll treat you, seeing as you want to go so badly. Not that I really wanted to go or anything…”
“You’re such a bad liar!” You laugh, pinching his cheek. “But, Satoru…I meant what I said.”
You look at him seriously, not willing to let this slide. You don’t expect him to match your intense energy, but he does.
“So did I. You don’t have to worry about that anymore, because I’ll never let that happen again. I’ll always be here for you, sweets. I’ll always protect you. You can try, but I’ll never make that mistake again. I’d never forgive myself if something happened to you because of me, so I won’t let it. I love you too much to let it happen.”
Your heart feels like it could burst. You sniffle, not able to hold the tears back.
“Aw, is my baby crying?” He teases, gently thumbing the tears away from your cheeks. “You okay?”
“Mhm, just happy,” You nod and let out a watery laugh. “Hey, Satoru.”
“Yeah?” He hums.
“Do you love me enough to give me the last kikufuku later?”
You expect him to joke along with you, but he’s perfectly serious in his words back. Only you seem to have that effect on him.
“Even that,” He chuckles along with you, unbridled warmth and affection swimming in his baby blues as he gazes at you, eyes never leaving your form. “Even that, sweets.”
Tumblr media
gojo masterlist <3
A/N: I don’t feel like this is the highest quality writing, but I felt really compelled to write this for some reason, so…oh well! <3 I hope it still turned out okay.
Also Satoru definitely should have apologized but I feel like he’s stubborn and hates apologizing so I left that out <3
I think this is the first time I've managed to not use (Y/N) HAHA, sometimes I see comments on other posts about how much it disturbs their immersive experience, so I'm going to try to limit my usage of it from now on...personally, I've seen and used it for so long that it's just part of my x reader vocabulary, but I understand why people don't like it lol.
Anyway, thank you for reading and I hope you had a great day today !! <333
364 notes · View notes