#who are Also getting up there in age and dont have much to begin with but thats what makes them sharing it with him all the sweeter
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
insinirate · 1 year ago
Note
Would nai ever consider taking in sr woo pup if he knows liv and nico have a dad out there stuck alone in a shelter?
obsessed with u guys' insistence on making senior woo dog a thing
28 notes · View notes
faaun · 2 years ago
Text
i feel conflicted abt my relationship...need advice etc . in tags . pls i need input sm
#i love my gf a lot and i think our relationship is doing rly good rn . i miss her a lot bc im in a diff country to her but ill see her#in a few weeks etc. anyway things are good....HOWERVER. i am worried abt . our future#like u are supposed to live in the moment and have fun and be young etc etc but this is like..the fact that its going well#is making me consider how our life paths would go tgth and if it would be fair to stay in a relationship u know wont work forever. like#this was one of the reasons why i felt hesitant at first etc. basically i swore to myself i would only date an academic or at least someone#who like. has. A Thing. that they are working towards that they are rly rly passionate abt. bc i thought it just wouldnt work out otherwise#and it seemed after a while of talking that she IS like that...shes applying for a graphic design degree and she seems to genuinely#love art etc so much and also she is amazing at it. HOWRVER...she hasnt drawn in a while#and is working a min wage job despite meaning to quit for ages...and as far as im aware#she still hasnt made a portfolio...etc etc. but im so confused bc like...shes great and ik she can do it i just dont#understand why she wont. she could also get an internship etc in the relevant field but i still dont get it...and its not my place to be#pushy abt it. like i already suggested these things and asked abt them but i dont want to ask any more bc like. its her choice#what she does w her life etc. but anyway its like...am i being pessimistic/impatient and everything is gonna#go well for her or do i hold genuine concerns. and if the latter/both potentially...is it unfair to be like#hey babe ik things are amazing rn but we have to reevaluate bc idk if in 10 yrs i would be happy w where we are#my friend was like. Break Up W Her from the beginning bc he thinks u shouldn't get into a relationship w smn whom you think will not also#elevate u in some way..and ur life paths dont align etc...but he is genuinely married to his academics like hes sworn off#love so i didnt rly listen bc hes rly extreme w his. love gets in the way of academics. etc#but also his point was valid i think? that you want the person u spend ur life w to elevate you. u want them to challenge you and make you#want to work harder and be better and achieve more and more...and i do want that and i have been trying to be that for them#but A) i can only be that to a reasonable extent for them before it starts being like nagging/being pushy and#B) i feel like if they end up going the way they are rn they can never be that for me. is that bad#like am i a horrible person for thinking this way. obviously i am not casting a moral judgement on her or anyone#for whatever path in life they choose to go down but also is it like...Silly to give up on a perfectly good#relationship bc ur like. as it stands i do not see you walking alongside me in 10 yrs etc#like im lich rally 20 . but what if it DOES end up going rly well and it DOES end up being thr case that we end up staying together#and then im like. feeling discouraged bc my partner in life is just not the kind of person i imagined being w when i was 19 or 20...#like in terms of careers etc. more importantly is this a discussion i should have w her . bc i literally do not know how to raise this#without sounding like a dick but is that bc i...am being a dick? is this a bad thing ?? is this thought not that of a good person ?#it sounds so WEIRD to be like hey babe either u have to start being more ambitious and insane abt ur art or i might break up w you. like :/
21 notes · View notes
widevibratobitch · 1 year ago
Text
.
#vent post vent post lalalala#i wanted to post some pictures from my weekend trip with my friends before its too late but then i saw my fucking face and now i wanna kms#like oh my god. oh my god this is really truly the face im stuck with forever and ever and ever till the day im fuckin rotting in the groun#incredible how unfair life can be lmao (<- girl who is having such incredibly superficial stupid fucking problems but is otherwise#quite privileged but of course that will never be fucking enough for her because she's soooooo fckn stupid and selfish and annoyinggg lol)#i dont know why im so obsessed with it now#like i genuinely remember KNOWING that im kinda ugly (and fat) in high school and being like 'so what lol idc'#so WHY is it such an issue now?????#idk. i just kinda wish i was dead every time i look at my face and realise there's nothing i can do to change it#i can dress in ways that will cover my ugly ass shapeless body. maybe i can even go back to my ed properly this time#and lose some weight. for a time. before i gain back twice as much and the circle begins anew lol#but my face is not gonna change no matter what i do lmao unless i fucking scrape it off with a grater or smash my head into pieces#and like. even if i do get that rhinoplasty (its not gonna change my faceshape anyway. nothing i can do to fix THAT fuckin atrocity)#every time ill look in the mirror i will only be reminded that its fake. and that my natural face was disgusting enough it had to be cut up#to be fixed somewhat.#i just wish i had ONE. just ONE nice thing about my body. literally just one its not even funny lol#and its so fucked up when you look at my mom who was so insanely fucking beautiful when she was my age. like. i cant blame her#cause how could she have known that the genes she'll pass on will not result in anything good lol but also i feel like such a failure#like its not really my fault i got the genes i got. but yknow.#anyway im tired of always being the ugliest person in any group im hanging out with. my cousins? check. my hometown friends? check.#my uni friends? my GOD check (how ARE they all so pretty and skinny??? insane).#god i wish i were dead. like fr fr. im not actively suicidal since i cant bring myself to *do* shit anyway. but i just wish i never existed
4 notes · View notes
meejijis · 3 months ago
Text
"Why are all SK fans proshippers" Silence fetus
#text#mind you SK was released in a very different time period where fandoms back in the day were built different. freaks strived and#everyone back in the day followed fandom etiquette “ship and let ship” and “dont like dont read”. fandoms back in the old day were#peaceful and supported one another. ppl shipped anything and everyone and ppl minded their own business in the early 2000s#thats how almost all old sk veteran fans i know turn out to be what they are today#(ofc there are some. other veteran folks i do not fuck with as theyre also genuine assholes and are hypocrites/ostracizes others.#. but another discussion for another day lol. you must be a level 100+ of friendship to unlock my tragic sk fan backstory)#also news flash all of your favorite anime/manga stories are all written by profic ppl! thats right! everyone in japan are profic#shocking i know#japanese folks dont give a flying rat ass when it comes to FICTIONAL morals because they know how to differentiate between fic and reality#the fact that so many antis keep on twisting the word proship so many times to the point where its widely misinterpreted and ppl#nowadays esp the younger gen easily believe in the misinformation and keep repeating the cycle of misinformation in modern fandoms today#it pisses me off honestly#but yeah what did you expected from a old series that came out in the late 90s. the fact that theyre consuming the series when the series#itself also literally has problematic elements too lol#and see this is why im glad SK is niche despite that i wish it was popular so it can bring in more renmei fans but in the end its better of#being niche#because had it blown up it wouldve attracted all of the chronically online kids/puritans/fandom police and ruin everything for everyone#modern fandom today is the reason why all fandoms suck nowadays and its why i gave up joining and being part of them#theres discrimination everywhere in modern fandoms. oh your a proshipper? gtfo DNI and kys!!!!11111#its like theres eggshells everywhere no matter where you go. you have to abide with morality and puritanical rules its the “automatic” law#but fuck that thats never been the automatic law in fandoms lol. Ship and let ship AND dont like dont read is the real fandom laws here lol#but back to what i want to also say. theres nothing you can do about SK fans being proshippers. the old fans has always operated that way#since the old times. either adapt / cope with it OR you can just. block everyone and preserve your peace. which takes like 10 seconds#this is like maybe the 15th SK puritan fan i know lol. then again i also know theres ALOT of renmei antis who follow the puritan mindset#imao. I say this alot many times but SK fandom is only ugly and almost everyone becomes a puritan when renmei gets mentioned#which has always made me ????????????????? so yall can handle yoyo boy and anna teen preg can handle serg getting groomed/manipulated#by marc and xes laws can handle kids getting their arms and legs ripped off can handle kids getting killed left and right#can handle shipping bruce lee whos like plenty years older than JUN which btw beginning of the series she starts off being 17#but a 4 year age gap between ren and jeanne is too much apparently and should be cancelled. geez louise
1 note · View note
univemma · 4 months ago
Text
I acknowledge that the season was cut almost in half so I should really cut them some slack but I WON'T, SO:
Plot holes/Forgotten Stuff in TUA:
(some of these are mostly just unanswered questions)
-Sloane?? Where tf did she go?
-Why was Jennifer (in the original timeline) in a cage? In Moldova?? Like, was she discovered to have something ( the dimaldo stuff whatever) inside of her, so they wanted to test on her? if she never came into contact with marigold before ben then why would they? WHAT
-also wait how the fuck did she get that stuff in her anyway? How did the dimaldo get to earth after it caused the end of Reginald's home planet? Like,,,shouldnt we know that?
-Her,,,in a squid??? she was Inside a giant squid? W h a t
-the S3 post credits of ben in the train. sure, whatever, that means nothing LMAOO
-I also can't get over - Five explaining "oh yeah when we do this EVERY ALTERNATE TIMELINE is gonna be destroyed, leaving only what should've been - the original," and lila fighitng to put her family in the train station,,,All the other timelines will be destroyed??They're dying and being reborn/reincarnated in the new one anyway GIRL WHAT ARE YOU DOING
(unless ive highly misunderstood that which is likely)
-this isnt a plot hole just - five "trying desperately over and over again to save his unhelpful family who he loves very very much" being literally turned into,,,that. did someone say character assassination?
-lila and five. thats a plot hole in and of itself I DONT CARE if he's aged 12 years from season 3, (6 yr timeskip at beginning of season, then 6 technically 7 in teh train), I DONT CARE IF HES 25 NOW, I DONT CARE IF HES MENTALLY 60 SOMETHING. Lila met and spent time with him when he looked like THIS
Tumblr media
THATS A CHILD. and clearly, the family had SOME contact in the 6 yr skip, so she WATCHED HIM GROW UP from 13 - 19, like thats just so WEIRD WHAT
this was supposed to be plot holes and just turned into me being pissed im sorry but HOW DO YOU FUCK UP AN ENDING THIS BAD??
2K notes · View notes
misstycloud · 5 months ago
Text
[Yandere.Rich man x ballerina reader]
Tumblr media
(I don’t actually know much about ballet so forgive me if things are incorrect!)
—————
Rich. Yandere who was pestered by his friend and his wife to join them at the opera house and enjoy a performance. The couple had asked him numerous times before but he’d always declined. He was a workaholic and didn’t have any other commitments, so there was no need to break his routine. Although he would never admit it to anyone- he barely does to himself- he often find himself imagining a different life; one where he had a wife to welcome him home every evening. Perhaps a few children too. There was no sound besides himself and the staff in his home, it would be so very nice to hear the noise of running feet and happy chatter echo through the empty halls.
Rich. Yandere who is lonely above all else. His family is dead and he has next to no friends- the only one he has is married and devote all his time to keep him company. He knows that he doesn’t have the best track-record of being the kindest person in the world, and he might not be the friendliest or the most out-going, still, doesn’t he deserve some love too?
Rich. Yandere who eventually give into his friends demand and goes with them to the opera. As they took their seats- the expensive and best ones, of course- his friends wife babble on about her favourite dancer. They were regulars there and had seen many performances. He simply sighed and leaned back into his seat, waiting for the show to begin. He could only hope that it’ll be somewhat enjoyable since he doesn’t like wasting his time.
Rich. Yandere who was prepared for it to be a dreadful 3 hours, rubbing his eyes and suffering from lack of blood-flow in his legs. Oh how wrong he was. Instantly his gaze zoomed into you as soon as you stepped forward from behind the curtain. You were so beautiful and you moved your body gracefully to the music. It was magical. While he knew close to nothing about ballet, he knew that the point of it were for the women to look like they’re floating, and it’s exactly what you were doing.
Rich. Yandere who is instantly enamoured with you. As someone who’s never felt love this was all a brand new experience for him. He asked his friend and his wife if they knew who you were, since they frequent the opera so much. And turns out the wife did know who you were; you were her favourite after all. Rich. Yandere was never close with her or particularly liked her even, but he had to give it to her: she has excellent taste in performers.
Rich. Yandere who starts looking up information regarding you. It’s be your name, age, background, family, where you went to school and where you live. Everything. He also begins donating a lot of money to the opera house. In a short amount of time he’s become their nr.1 funder. The managers and owners are ecstatic at the news! They ask why he’s so generous and he simply answers that he loves culture and thinks it’s important it doesn’t disappear. Then, they wonder if there is anything they can do for him return, to which he smiles in response.
“Well, I do suppose there is one dancer I would be delighted to meet in person.”
Rich. Yandere who you feel uncomfortable around. He is so strange. You were just a normal ballerina, a dancer, no better or worse than anyone before your time. That’s why you can’t fathom the interest this wealthy man has taken in you. You two came form completely different worlds! But what can you do when your bosses not-so-gently urge you to see this man alone? You dont have any other skills and can’t apply to another job if you get fired.
Rich. Yandere who is determined to make you fall for him the way he has fallen for you. He’ll take care of you, love you and protect you. You don’t have to worry about a thing. He will do anything for his love.
“Don’t be scared, just keep on dancing, my little dancer.”
1K notes · View notes
mooooonnnzz · 4 months ago
Note
I saw your earlier post on Platonic fics and Im a sucker for them so here u go : father figure stanford headcannons maybe takes place after he comes back from the portal, reader is an adventurous spirit that works at the shack and maybe secretly helped stan get his brother back? Idk im just throwing things here lol
Tumblr media
Tumblr media
You Know I Love You Still
Stanford x daughter!reader
💗 stanford dad hc!!
💗 i literally saw the request it and started writing and got a lil carried away 😭 its like half story half hc? if that makes sense
💗 requests r so open rn! i def dont have any fav requests… (anything platonic or familial will be the first ones i write i LOVE those types of requests)
💗 the age of the reader is young like 16/17? ik that lowkey contradicts with the time line but wtv STANFORD DAD HC!!
💗 it’s a little bit of everything? like it’s not only just reader and stanford, the twins r also included in some scenarios and also stan
💗 a big happy family 😭
💗 fem reader gulp i completely didnt realize until i was done that i used she/her when referring to the reader
💗 next fic will use gender neutral pronouns I SWUEAR!!
💗2k words
💗 i apologize for rhe misspell and mistakes i didnt catch in advance
Working together with your Uncle Stan to build the portal to bring your dad back to the right dimension was tiresome. Nights were sleepless and many of them were spent in the underground lab, where you and Stan did everything possible to assemble the portal. Trying to keep such a secret away from the twins and Soos was unexpectedly hard. The knowledge of hiding someone so vital to you and to your Uncle Stan was weighing down on you and him. Then came the day where his awaited arrival was promised. You could barely sleep that night. You thought of so many different possibilities and scenarios of how you would greet him. Would he remember you? Did he ever miss you? Does he even love you?!
The next day came in like a tornado and before you knew it, you were protectively standing in front of the button; trying your absolute hardest to prevent the twins from pressing the button.
“Why do you guys want to stop the portal so badly!” You yelled over the loud swirling wind that emitted from the portal. “Because it’s dangerous!” Dipper retorted, using his arm to shield him from the debris whizzing past him. “G-Grunkle Stan isn’t who he says he is!” Dipper said, stepping closer to you.
“Whatever you guys saw or heard isn’t what you think it is! Please, you need to believe me.” You begged, your eyes brimming with tears. You’ve worked so hard to get this portal up and running and you weren’t going to let Dipper or anyone stop you from being able to see your dad.
Soos came up from behind and wrapped his arms around you. “I’m sorry, dude.” He picked you up and took you away from the button. “Soos, no!” You thrashed around his hold. You pound your fists against his arms, hoping it’ll loosen his grip on you but nothing you did worked. No matter how much you begged and fought against him, he didn’t budge. He just held you closer to him, muttering ‘I’m Sorry’ under his breath.
“This all stops now!” Dipper raised his hand, palm flattened out, ready to push the button when Stan appeared at the doorway. “Don’t touch that button!”
He’s hunched forward, hand leaning on the frame of the doorway as he pants. Relief washes over you upon seeing Stan. Silence fills the room for a minute and all you can hear is your heart hammer against your ribcage. Stan walks towards Dipper, beckoning him to not press the button.
“If you just let me explain—“ He’s cut off by his watch repeatedly beeping. Suddenly the ground begins to shake.
The portal powers up and the circle enlarges. The electricity spazzes and travels throughout the room, creating streaks of electrical power. Your feet lift off the ground and soon everyone’s floating up in the air. The wind is fierce and it’s whipping through every direction, pushing you towards the wall.
Dipper yells at Mable to turn off the portal before it causes anymore damage. She tugs herself closer to the button using a stray cable and while she wraps herself around the neck holding up the button, Stan is begging her to listen to him and to not press the button. He’s soon tackled by Soos who pushes him away from Mable. They all fight with each other and you’re watching with a bated breath.
The portal pulses with power, sending you back first into the wall. Stan and Dipper bicker back and forth and Mable is torn with the decision of either believing her brother or her Grunkle. She lowers her hand, eyes closed and you're almost convinced she’s going to press the button when she lets go of the button. She floats up with her arms raised. “Grunkle Stan, I believe you.” She says.
“Mable, are you crazy?! We’re all gonna—!”
The world flashes white and you're immediately knocked out. You awaken to yourself plummeting face first down to the floor. You groan, pushing yourself up with one hand and the other wiping off the dust on your face. Looking around you can see your family scattered around the room, each of them slowly waking up from whatever happened and stumbling back to their feet.
Your head quickly whips towards the portal and your heart lurches into your throat upon seeing a figure step out of it. He stands still, staring straight ahead as he takes off his hood and goggles. And what hid behind them was your father.
After the initial shock of meeting the one behind the three books and the reveal of him being related to Stan was pushed aside, you presented yourself with the help of Stan. “H-Hi, Dad.” You awkwardly greet yourself.
His eyes stop on you and he freezes, eyes blown wide and mouth slightly ajar. He takes a minute to process the absurdity of the situation before he’s snapping back to consciousness. He blinks once, his mouth stuttering as he finds the right words to say. He then blinks again, stepping a cautious step towards you. Your name softly spills out of his mouth and your heart soars hearing your Dad finally utter your name again.
You take a step forward and then another and another until you’re face to face with him. Being closer to him allowed you to see how much he has aged since the last time you saw him. “Dad…” You whisper, throwing yourself into him.
A light wheeze escapes his mouth from the sudden impact of your body crashing on him. Once he recovers, his arms are quickly wrapped around you, hugging you with so much warmth and love you almost sobbed right then and there.
He snuggled his face against your hair, breathing in your familiar scent he missed so dearly while he was away. “We have so much to catch up on.” You say so quietly that he almost lost your words if it wasn’t for you being directly near his ear. He hums in affirmation, cherishing the long awaited reunion with his daughter.
“I feel like this is another part where one of us faints again.” Mable says in utter disbelief at the scene that unfolded in front of her. “Ohoh!” Soos laughed out. “I’m so on it, dudes.” As if on command his eyes roll to the back of his head and he faints flat on his back.
HEADCANON TIME!!
• You weren’t really expecting to talk to him much due to Stan wanting to talk to his brother, but after their fight, he came looking for you. When he found you, you were sitting on the couch that was outside on the porch. You were reading a book you recently purchased from the bookstore. Nose deep in your book, you failed to realize Ford standing beside you. His hands were shoved in the pockets of his trench coat. Quietly he asked, “Is there room for one more?”
• The night was spent with the two of you getting to know each other. From your favorite color to your favorite show, what food you like to eat and so on. Ford wanted to fully understand and know you as a person. He wanted to make up all the years he lost with you.
• The next day, you awoke to the smell of your favorite breakfast food being cooked. With haste you pushed your blanket off of you and slipped on your slippers and sped off into the kitchen where Ford was buttering the pan. He looked over to you and flashed you a smile. “I made you your favorite.” He said, motioning over to the table where he laid out your breakfast. “You didn’t have to do this.” You scratched your cheek, a small laugh of surprise leaving you. “I’m just doing what I always dreamed of doing.” He shoveled out his breakfast onto his plate using a spatula. “How’s the food, kiddo?” He asks, placing the pan and spatula on the dirty side of the sink. “Actually pretty good for someone who hasn't been in this dimension for over a decade!” You jest, taking another delicious bite from your breakfast. Ford jokingly rolled his eyes, ruffling your hair as he walked past you and sat down on his chair. “Already poking fun at me.” He said, shaking his head.
• Stanford knew he had to focus on his projects, he had so many things he left unfinished that he'd been dying to get his hands on the minute he stepped foot into his dimension. But he couldn’t seem to pull himself away from you. He loved seeing you interact with the twins, he loved watching how pieces of his personality shone through you. Like the way you’re so meticulous with where you put things, or how you were forever curious about the things around you, and even the abundance of questions you’d mutter to yourself as you discovered something new. That’s all of him right there, in front of him and he couldn’t grasp such a thought that you were his!
• He finds himself gazing upon baby photos Stan took of you when you were younger. Even if he’s angry at his twin currently, he’s forever grateful that he documented such beautiful memories in a scrapbook. “Y’know, I used to tell stories about you to her.” A shriek leaves Ford. He jumps forward, the scrapbook tumbling down his lap and onto the floor. “You idiot! Be careful.” Stan sneered, kneeling down to the floor to pick up the scrapbook. “Stanley!” Ford leans his head back, trying to regain his composure. “You scared me!” He says. “Yeah, yeah. I know.” Stan waves him off, grabbing the scrapbook and tucking it in between his arms. They stand in awkward silence, eyes darting around the place uneasily. “Did…” Ford starts, shattering the silence. “Did she like the stories you told of me?” Stan smiles fondly, nodding his head. “She loved them. She thought you were some stupid amazing superhero, no matter what I told her.” Ford furrowed his brows. “Wait, what do you mean by no matter what you told her?” Stan nervously laughed. “Hey, why don’t you keep looking at these photos! Wait here, look at this one. Haha! She’s trying to eat her toes, isn’t that adorable?” “Stanley.”
• Outings between the two of you were very common. He loved being tugged around the town of Gravity Falls by you as you pointed at various different shops and locations. You told him the reasons why you hated them or loved them, and some were tied to stories that happened within the summer. He seriously questioned how you and the twins survived so many times where you were just so close to death. The mall was a place where you and him resided the most. With the money he took from Stan, he paid for almost everything you wanted. Entering the shack with so many bags was a shock to everyone. “Woah! Did you buy the whole mall?” Mable jokes, grabbing one of the bags to help you with the load. “Basically,” you laughed, instructing Mable to rally Soos and Dipper to have a little haul of what you bought. Stan watched with a raised brow as you stumbled into the living room with Mable following closely behind. “Where did you get all the money to buy her all of that?” Stan asks. “Just stole some money from some hobo.” Ford said, walking into the living room to join in on the haul. Stan didn’t understand what he said and opened the cash register. When he saw all the money he had stored the day before gone, it all clicked.
• Adventures out in the woods is a must. Gathering the twins and your dad, all four of you venture out into the woods in hopes to find something new. “Why couldn’t Grunkle Stan tag along with us?” Mable asked as she kneeled down to pluck a flower from the dirt. “Because he’s being a wet towel.” Dipper muttered, scribbling down a rough drawing of the flower Mable was picking in a book you bought him. “So what kind of anomalies you three stumbled upon?” Ford questioned. You and the twins began to dump everything onto him, from when you started seeing them to when Dipper and Mable came. Ford couldn’t truly focus on what they were saying, mostly because it was a jumbled excited mess of words, but partially because he was astonished with the trio in front of him. They went through so much and yet they’re still so headstrong. He could definitely see a little bit of him in Dipper and Mable.
• Stan would find you and Ford fallen asleep on the couch or in his lab, all huddled up together and completely knocked out. Snores filled the room and he found it amusing that you and him both snores the same. Videos and photos were definitely taken by Mable.
• Ford would tell stories of his adventures in another dimension to you. Stemming from how he started from the ground up to him getting banned from many other dimensions for stealing parts. “You’re not so different from Uncle Stan,” You laughed, shaking your head. “What! It was only a few…hundred dimensions.”
• There’s times where you’d wake up in a cold sweat, afraid that your Dad finally coming back was just a painful dream your brain played on you. But when you would get ready to find him, you’d step on his stomach or back. “Ough!” Ford groaned out in pain. Being suddenly woken up from his sleep, he sat up, looking around confused. “What are you doing sleeping on the floor?” You sat back down on your bed, pulling the blankets over you. “Is there a problem with me sleeping on the floor?” Ford asks, looking at you with squinted eyes. “No, no.” You laid back down on your bed. “Go back to sleep. I’m better now,” You say, somewhat amused with Ford sleeping on the floor beside your bed. “Goodnight, I love you.” You brush your fingers playfully across his face to annoy him. He shoves your fingers away from his face, huffing out. “Goodnight,” He shuffles to his side, looking up to you with a small smile. “I love you more, kiddo.”
950 notes · View notes
mythalism · 2 months ago
Text
Tumblr media
i realized the other day after posting about this fan theory that, at this point, it is basically talked about in fandom as if its canon, and newer fans might not understand why. my goal today was to explain the theory and all of the evidence we have for it in inquisition to give people a better understanding of why this has become so ubiquitous, and to hopefully have something to look back on in two months with that "apollo gift of prophecy" dodgeball meme when veilguard proves us right.
very important before i get started: this is not my theory. i didn't make it up. unfortunately, i also don't know exactly who did and if it could even be traced at this point. this is something that many people have believed for a long time, and i'm not the first to write about it. there are a lot of great posts and essays that speculate on this theory, and what it could mean for solas's character going forward.
PLEASE feel free to contribute thoughts, or link to posts you have made yourself or seen before in the replies/reblogs!!! much of my own experience with this comes from long before this account existed, so i dont have exact sources but rather random, amorphous fandom knowledge of this theory and what major arguments have circulated in the past 10 years. this post by @sammakesart and this post by @mrs-gauche went around recently and both touch on this theory and i highly recommend them both! i know @corseque has also written about this theory multiple times over the years.
i was first introduced to this on tumblr when it started gaining ground in the fandom after the release of trespasser in 2015, predominantly due to a couple of lines of cole dialogue from trespasser, so that is where we will begin.
shoutout to @daitranscripts and the dragon age wiki for the dialogue
this line of cole's is basically the foundation of this theory, and what is cited most often. i'm not entirely sure if the theory existed before trespasser, but if it did, i dont remember it being well-known or widely accepted like it is now.
Tumblr media
this line is usually interpreted to suggest that solas, who would have been a spirit of wisdom/pride at the time, took a body and came into being as an elf at mythal's behest. this is also the line that suggests solas himself once wore vallaslin, and that he removed it himself using the same spell he uses on a romanced lavellan thousands of years later, but did so clumsily the first time and left the scar we can see on his eyebrow.
Tumblr media Tumblr media
first i want to acknowledge what are pretty much the most damning indications of this theory
solas means "pride; to stand tall" in elvhen, according to world of thedas vol. 1
the dread wolf form we see in murals, written descriptions, and of course, in real life in the veilguard trailer, bears a pretty clear resemblance to pride demons:
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
most notably, in the face and eyes. yeah i dont really have anything else to say about those lmao it's pretty blatant
overall, inquisition tells us a great deal about spirits, and gives the player an alternate worldview through which to understand them, distinct from the chantry/circle narrative presented previously.
solas himself, along with cole, has a lot to say about the nature of spirits throughout his dialogue and banter with several characters. one sentiment that he espouses repeatedly is that spirits and demons are the same thing, but demons are a spirit corrupted and perverted away from its purpose.
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Solas: They rarely seek this world. When they do, their natures do not often survive exposure to the people they encounter. Wisdom and purpose are too easily twisted to pride and desire
During All New, Faded for Her:
PC: Solas, you said your friend was a wisdom spirit. Solas: That is not its natural form. It has been corrupted. PC: Corrupted? Solas: Forced to act against its original purpose. What did they do, what did they do, what did they do?
second, that spirits and the fade are a mirror, and reflect the waking world. specifically, that spirits reflect the perception and expectation of a mortal, and adapts accordingly. belief makes reality.
On Ostagar:
PC: I've heard the stories. It would be interesting to hear what it was really like. Solas: That's just it. In the Fade, I see reflections created by spirits who react to the emotions of the warriors. One moment, I see heroic Wardens lighting the fire and a power mad villain sneering as he lets King Cailan fall. The next, I see an army overwhelmed and a veteran commander refusing to let more soldiers die in a lost cause. PC: And you can't tell which is real? Solas: It is the fade. They are all real.
and third, that spirits are people.
solas expresses concerns over what the breach does to spirits at multiple points, including here with cassandra.
Tumblr media
he also regularly argues in favor of spirits personhood, and passionately pushes back against characters who argue the opposite, such as dorian:
Tumblr media
as well as the inquisitor themselves, should they choose certain dialogue options:
PC: You trust these spirits not to possess you the first time you accidentally make a wish? Solas: Do you trust your friends not to turn on you? (authors note: LMFAOOOOOOO) PC: Well, yes, but they're people. Solas: Ah, of course. PC: You know what I mean. Solas: Are people only people because they are flesh and blood? Solas: Is Cassandra defined by her cheekbones and not her faith? Varric by his chest hair not his wit? PC: They're not defined by their bodies, but they do have bodies. You need one to be a person. Solas: A demon possessing a corpse has a body. PC: A living body. Solas: A demon possesses a living mage to become an abomination. PC: They didn't make that body. They just took it over. Solas: Technically your mother created your body, with some help from your father, one assumes. PC: You've thought about this. Solas: On occasion, yes. OR:
PC: Spirits are bound by their nature. You said it yourself. They're shaped by contact with real people. Solas: Just as Leliana was shaped by contact with Divine Justinia, as those who serve the inquisition are shaped by you. If I change your mind in this conversation, does that mean you're no more real than a spirit? OR: PC: Im certain you have some rhetorical trick ready to counter anything I say. Solas: It's likely. I've had a lot of time to discuss the question with people. Or "spirits", if you prefer.
aside from this entire conversation being hilarious and very fen'harel coded, i think its notable that his enthusiasm and snark here is distinct from the way he engages in other debates, where he is often clinical and detached. on the subject of spirits, however, we get a lot more emotional investment from him - it feels personal. as he says, he's thought about it. on occasion.
solas having originally been a spirit adds helpful context for his insistence on spirit's personhood despite modern thedas's completely contradictory beliefs, and also helps inform his worldview more generally, especially in regards to elves.
one of solas's most heavily criticized aspects is his disdain for modern elves and the dalish. and i agree, it's fucked up and he is an absolute ass about it at nearly every opportunity. however, his feelings regarding the elves sometimes seem... strange, even in the context of him being an ancient elf.
keeping in mind cole's line from trespasser, that he "did not want a body", as well as another cole line from trespasser:
Tumblr media
most people infer that there is some sort of resentment on solas's end for him having to become human at mythal's request. it seems as if he was turned away from his purpose. wisdom forced to be pride.
cole's personal quest, which shows solas passionately arguing to keep cole a spirit, supports this. it is almost as if he is trying to prevent cole from the same fate that was forced upon him.
throughout the quest he says things such as: "This is not some fanciful story, child of the stone. We cannot change our nature by wishing." "A spirit does not work through emotions. It embodies them." "You would alter the essence of what he is." "It is good that he is not entirely changed, however human he becomes."
most telling of all, i think is this line at the end of the quest if you elect to keep cole as a spirit.
Varric: "He could have been a person." Solas: Possibly. Would that have made him happier?
OUGGHGH.
clearly, for solas, the answer was no. being a person has not made him happier.
regardless, solas still values spirits as fundamentally equal to people despite their differences and worthy of the same freedoms, self-determination and respect.
this kinship with spirits, however, might help explain his disdain for elves, in a way i find to be more satisfying than "all ancient elves are assholes" and more in-line with his character overall.
it seems as if solas doesnt see himself as separate from modern elves because he doesnt see himself as a modern elf, but that he doesnt not see himself as an elf at all, but rather as a spirit.
solas infamously says, following halamshiral if you bring up briala:
"I'm sorry, I was confused. I do not consider myself to have much in common with the elves."
the inquisitor has the option for several responses, and although most of us probably pick the one that tells him to fuck off, the others are more telling:
PC: Nor should you. You're not defined by the shape of your ears. They're not your people. Solas: No, they are not. OR PC: Who do you have much in common with. Who are your people? Solas: A good question. Solas: I joined the inquisition to save the world. Regardless of who "my people" are, this was the best way to help him.
"not being defined by the shape of your ears" and solas's immediate identification with the statement and approval of it sticks out to me. it seems like he's just being racist, and he very well might be, but in the context of this theory, it can also be interpreted as him disliking being "defined" by having a body at all, or any physical characteristics, consistent with how he resists the idea that varric and cassandra are defined by their own physical characteristics.
if the player insists they want to help the orlesian elves even if he doesnt, he still has something interesting to say:
Solas: Stop Corypheus. That will do for a start. It speaks well of you to feel for the oppressed. Help them for that. Know them for what they are.
this is not the only time he equates all oppressed groups of thedas to one another, defined by their shared subjugation rather than the real, in-world divisions such as race and religion. it's also interesting to consider the relationship between oppression, as a situation that evokes certain emotions in those who experience it, such as pride. as solas says of ostagar, spirits there were drawn to the emotions of the soldiers there. are spirits of pride drawn to situations of oppression, where pride is needed for liberation?
solas's failure (or refusal) to recognize the reality of how oppression functions in modern thedas along lines of race and ethnicity specifically is one of his biggest flaws, but it continues to fit with this theory, as it is consistent with that same sort of single-minded, spirit tunnel-vision that we see from spirits and demons. i would also assume that he considers spirits to be part of this monolithic group of "the oppressed", considering the spirit slavery/bondage practices in tevinter and nevarra, both of which he criticizes.
i do believe, however, that to equate all of solas's unfair derision of the dalish to him identifying with spirits over people, rather than ancient elves over modern elves, would be too generous and an oversimplification. its also clear how much of his anger towards the dalish comes from... wait for it.... his wounded pride.
solas is prideful. when he is faced with pride in others, he becomes defensive, even nasty. when his pride is challenged, often by others pride, he becomes almost unrecognizable. the dalish specifically rub up against his pride, in the most specific of ways that grate at his most cherished qualities and that disregard his own perception of himself. the thing he is most proud of, leading a slave rebellion against corrupt tyrants, erased from history entirely. branded a traitor instead, while those he fought against are worshiped as saviors for millennia.
Solas: I have joined my fair share of causes. But when I offered lessons learned in the Fade, I was derided by my enemies... and sometimes by my allies. Liar. Fool. Madman. There are endless ways to say something isn't worth listening to. Over time, it grinds away at you.
its also possible, considering what we know of the nature of expectation creating reality for spirits, that the dalish framing of the dread wolf actually does indeed make him worse - more arrogant, less compassionate, more ruthless, more cunning, more of a liar. a spirit being perverted into a demon based on the dominant perception of it.
perhaps the most interesting tidbit about solas of all which supports this theory, is that this phenomenon of expectation shaping his nature, making him more prideful or more humble, is not exclusive to the world of thedas, but also occurs on a meta-level with the player by proxy of the inquisitor.
a 2020 interview of trick weekes, solas's writer, says this pretty much verbatim.
"Solas mirrors. If you approach Solas from a place of humility and say, "I want to learn from you," Solas will bend over backwards to tell you how flawed he is and how he's just coming at this from his own limited understanding. If you come in with ego, Solas is genetically incapable of not bristling when he sees your ego... because he can't not do that."
this is fascinating for like 7 million reasons, but most notably for the language trick uses that i believe to be incredibly revealing. first, solas himself talks about how spirits "mirror" the real world multiple times. second is the way in which they speak about solas's mirroring as innate, uncontrollable, and involuntary. he is genetically incapable of not mirroring. genetically incapable of not bristling at someone else's pride. this being a genetic incapability implies, pretty unambigously, that he is a spirit. we dont know of any people in thedas who have pride in their DNA. except. you know. pride demons.
pride is his purpose. he cannot turn away from it or betray that purpose to pursue something else. he cannot change his nature simply by wishing. if he were to attempt it, he would be corrupted.
trick offers this information as an explanation for player's extremely varied perception of solas when playing the game, and it perfectly mimics the way solas himself talks about spirits as being created by a dreamer's expectation of them.
when asked about his friendships with spirits, he says:.
PC: You're saying that you became friends with pride and desire demons? Solas: They were not demons for me. PC: Meaning? Solas: The Fade reflects the minds of the living. If you expect a spirit of wisdom to be a pride demon, it will adapt/ And if your mind is free of corrupting influences? If you understand the nature of the spirit? They can be fast friends.
i just love how perfectly this reflects every fandom argument that's been had on twitter about solas for the past 10 years. like seriously.
random twitter user: you like that guy!? but hes a [demon]!! solas stans: he wasn't a demon for me
and it is true; people who are pretty deep into the games often know what solas is like to a low-approval inquisitor, but it can be shocking for new players to see what he is like at the other end of the approval spectrum, whether that is someone who hated him seeing the tenderness with which he kisses a romanced lavellan goodbye to remove her anchor in trespasser, or someone who romanced him witnessing the cruelty and detachment which with he grabs a low-approval inquisitor to yank off their anchor. he becomes almost an entirely different person based on how the player treats him.
for all that solas, in true spirit form, reflects the perceptions of the players, he has plenty of pure pride-demon vibes on his own, independent of player expectation. he is not just proud, or made proud as a mirror for player/character pride, but he often even goes as far as to act in ways that mimic how we have seen from spirits more generally, as well as pride demons specifically.
the wiki states:
Tumblr media
"Spirits are not complex in the sense that they seize upon a single facet of human experience, and this one idea becomes their identity.[3] They are formed as a reflection of the real world and its passions.[10] A spirit embodies and latches onto a specific purpose and will do all in its power to fulfill that purpose. For instance, a hunger demon will attempt to feed on anything it crosses,[4] and a spirit of justice will stop at nothing to uphold its name”
along with further reinforcing solas's tunnel vission as characteristic of spirits, he does indeed intentionally attempt to stoke arrogance in others, as well as test characters to see if they are vulnerable to arrogance and power-hungriness. this is probably best exemplified by his banter with vivienne, versus his banter with cassandra.
Tumblr media
i mean this one is self explanatory. cmon.
but it becomes especially interesting when compared to his interactions with cassandra, of whom he starts out very distrustful of. however, through their banter, he immediately begins to test her for indications of her inclination towards arrogance and desire for power:
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
cassandra passes solas's tests and earns his approval through her humility, curiosity, and willingness to give up power for the greater good. as a result, solas softens considerably towards her, and becomes more evocative of wisdom than pride, offering her advice when she asks, though very humbly:
Tumblr media
"i would hardly presume" is actually hilarious considering how he does presume. ALL THE TIME. but it shows the extent of this "mirroring" that trick mentions, when compared to how he speaks with vivienne, who does not pass his tests of pride: notice how his jabs at her specifically target her pride, the things she is proud of about herself, and tear them down:
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
he tells her that her position in the orlesian court is unearned, that the freedom she is so proud of winning for herself will come to an inevitable end, and that her resistance to demons does not make her special. its absolutely BRUTAL.
its especially important to note how little bearing vivienne and cassandra's backgrounds have on solas's perception of them. vivienne is a circle mage, a group of people who solas deeply sympathizes with, and believes should be freed. meanwhile cassandra is effectively templar, a group whom solas despises and finds unjust, and has been complacent in the oppression of mages that solas is so vehemently against.
and yet? it does not matter. he measures their worth based entirely on their propensity for pride.
it’s worth noting too, keeping in mind Solas’s almost uncharacteristic reverence for cassandra’s faith in the maker and (take this with a grain of salt because it was david gaider and he said via forum post….) that there are actually two types of spirits that become pride. wisdom, and faith.
"A spirit embodies and latches onto a specific purpose and will do all in its power to fulfill that purpose."
what we DONT know: pretty much everything else about this. what was the process like? at what point in history did he take the body? how was that body made? was it stolen? did he start as wisdom and turn into pride later? did he always oscillate between both? was he corrupted by what was asked of him, to fight, as his friend was in his personal quest?
i could continue talking about this forever, probably, especially with how it manifests in the solavellan relationship and what it suggests for solas's story in veilguard, but ill cut it here for both my own sanity and yours. but first, a few fun dialogue bits that strike me as very pride-demon coded but didn't fit anywhere else in this analysis.
Tumblr media
in conclusion:
Tumblr media
472 notes · View notes
syxilla · 5 months ago
Text
Ken sato x !reporter reader
oh, how he wishes you saw him as a man and not a boy.
cw for everything below: age difference (its used for the plot), suggestive (depending on who you ask)
thinking about kenji trying to impress reader in his games. the reader who is older, more mature and composed than him. who always comments on his arrogance in their articles or interviews. honestly, you were his harshest critic! it was your nickname amongst your co-workers as well. everyone knew you held hatred for him, and so did he. you frequently commented on his age and how it isn't smart to put so much faith into such a young and ignorant man and call him a living legend. "he isn't mature enough!" you always stated.
he hated that. his age doesn't make him better or worse than anyone else; he was just better because he was ken sato. but that didn't stop him from trying to act older, at least around you. because it was for you.
he's still so desperate to impress you. he'd do cooler moves in games, smile at the camera more in interviews, and, even though it seemed impossible, he became more prideful. but he couldn't help it! feeling your intense gaze on him as he walked onto the field or got into a stance, it was invigorating.
he especially got a rise out of seeing you roll your eyes, slumping back in your seat, crossing one leg over the other once you realized there was nothing for you to comment on his performance. it was perfect. so perfect that it would (sometimes, if he was lucky) get a small, ever so slight, smile from your lips. even better if he saw you nod your head in approval. so after one of (arguably) his best perfomances yet, one he spent weeks practicing just for his pretty little critic, he walks up to you, ready to soak in all the praise he believed he deserved.
"so... how was that y/n?" he teased, slamming himself into your personal space. it's his favorite place! if you thought it belonged to you, it was also his. "leave me alone, sato." you grumble, not wanting to admit your defeat to him. "it was good, wasn't it? right? righttt?" you push him away and begin walking away, eyes looking straight forward to avoid his gaze.
"oh c'mon, am i really that bad you can't even compliment me?" he pouted playfully, poking your oh so soft cheek, giving it a slight pinch. "fine, sato! you're a good player. you impressed me today, enough for me to even say im... proud of you." if you were to sneeze each time kenji's heart began to race, it'd look like you're having a seizure because of how fast it was.
"then why dont you show me how proud you are of me," this made you halt, snapping your head towards him. "how?" you asked, eyes focused on his lips that quirked up into a grin. "take me out to dinner. tommorow night. let me pick, and i'll consider the debt you owe me paid off." he smiled, taking a step back, allowing you to breathe again. when did you stop? "i'm not indebted to you anyway?" you retort, pushing him back even more to feel like you had the upper hand here. "yes, you are! all the times you've doubted my abilities! am i not worthy of getting an apology? a gift?" he said dramatically, placing his hand on his chest.
you sputter nothing in disbelief, until something clocks inside of your little brain. "are you asking me on a date, sato?" you asked, crossing your arms over your chest, a shit eating grin on your face. he leans down to your level, which is when you register how much taller he was than you, and tilts his head to the side. "and if i am?" kenji's voice goes quieter. "you're not my type." you mock, mimicking his tone. "i like them older." to this, he laughs. "you like grandpa's y/n? you like them near their deathbed?" he joked, trying (and failing) to hide his laughter. "yeah, atleast they're gentlemen, unlike you."
"i may not be the most gentlemanly person on earth, but i am a gentle man in everything else."
oh! oh. now you were entering dangerous territory. not for him, for you. it was so clear what he was setting up as a trap, and yet, despite all the warning signs there was, opened your plump little lips and asked with the purest face ever (even though your thoughts were the complete opposite) "how can i know if youre lying or not?"
and kenji, oh the annoying ken sato who you would never admit admired, not even on your deathbed, stepped closer to you, leaned down near your ear, and said in the loudest voice, loud enough so that you cant mishear him, and quiet enough that no one else can, says
"why dont i show you?"
if your composure was a ship, it would be near the ocean floor, the reason for sinkage; ken sato. right when your last functioning braincell is able to deliver a quip before total failure, someone calls kenji over. "you have a interview remember?" it yelled. "coming!" he smiled sweetly, kissing your cheek ever so softly.
the immature baseball player might not be as immature as you thought...
(thanks for the support on the last one, so i thought i'd write another one because im desperate for this man, like he's desperate for the reader, lowk. also i didnt fully proofread itmso sorry if skme names r missing colors and whatnot)
498 notes · View notes
smileysuh · 2 years ago
Text
sapiosexual
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
🌙 staring. Seungcheol x afab!Reader 
🔮 preview. “You’re a beautiful, bright, young woman, and you’re agreeing to be a companion to some middle aged psych nut who hardly has enough time for you-” you both laugh a little at the way he refers to himself, “compensation is a must.”
cw/ tw. daddy kink/issues, size/shoulder/back kink, contractual relationship, unspecified age difference, unprotected sex, choking, semi bondage, multiple sex scenes, fingering, squirting, oral (m/f receiving), baby oil massage, praise, dirty talk, hair pulling, overstim, dacryphilia, slight orgasm denial, hand kink, etc... I pet names. his: daddy. hers: gorgeous, angel, darling, my love, pretty girl, etc...
👹 rating. 18+ explicit I wc. 18.6k
🍭 aus. psychologist au, non idol au, sugar daddy au, aged up/soft dom cheol, etc...
☀️ mlist + an. dont fuck your psychologist, fuck a psychologist... and try to get a cheque while you do it 👀 (sapiosexual: the attraction to intelligence and broad af shoulders)
Tumblr media
1: Wednesday
“I’m here to meet someone- under the name Choi?”
The hostess nods politely. “Mister Choi has been expecting you, right this way.”
Your heart lurches in your chest at her words. While it makes sense that the man you’re meeting for your date had let the host know he’d have a plus one joining him, there’s something in the woman’s diction that suggests a certain kind of familiarity. 
The restaurant you’re in is an expensive one, and the previous man you’d met through the online sugar dating website had made something of a show of being a part owner of a place such as this, treating the staff in a way that demanded obedience- 
You really hope, for everyone’s sake, that the person you’re meeting tonight is much kinder than the last.
The hostess takes you through the main dining section of the establishment and to a more secluded area, where she motions with a hand to the one occupied table by the windows that overlook the city. 
“Your server will come by for your drink order shortly,” she tells you, giving you a quick nod and something of a knowing smile before she returns to her post, allowing you to make the final distance to the table yourself.
The man sitting with his back to you hasn’t turned around, and you take a moment to collect yourself, swallowing thickly. Your eyes scan over his broad shoulders, taking in the pretty tweed suit, the colour of charcoal, and neatly styled black hair. 
You take a deep breath and begin forward.
“Sorry I’m late,” you apologize as you reach the man you’ve been in contact with just under a week- “you know how traffic can be-”
Your words feel jumbled in your mouth as Mr. Choi stands to greet you- because, although you’d been expecting a handsome man, you hadn’t been expecting him to be godlike-
The photos he’d had on the sugar dating site had been ten out of tens, but the man in front of you is a scale breaker. 
He’s even broader up close, and tall too- looking down at you with an amused expression, eyes practically twinkling-
“It’s alright,” he tells you smoothly, voice sexier than you could have ever imagined, “I’m glad you’re here now.”
“Me too,” you breathe, blinking up at him, etching his angelic features into your brain-
“You look beautiful,” Mr. Choi says, taking in the dress you’d spent three hours picking out-
His eyes don’t linger anywhere in particular, they’re quick to move back up to your face, and part of you almost wishes he’d stared at your chest just a little longer-
“Thank you,” you say, remembering you’ve yet to respond to his compliment.
“Would you like to sit?” he asks next, and you realize you’ve been staring too long, quickly tearing your gaze from him to give a curt nod. 
The two of you take your seats, and you adjust in your chair, letting out a shaky laugh. “I’m also sorry if I’m a little awkward- I feel like my social skills took a hit during the pandemic.” 
The man in front of you nods. “That’s understandable. The aftereffects of global isolation during covid is something that’s going to be studied by psychologists in depth in the coming years. You’re not alone in your feelings, believe me.”
You blink, thinking through his words. “Thank you-” you stutter, “for the reassurance, I mean.”
“Of course,” he nods again. “I think you’ll find I can be very reassuring, if need be.” 
Your skin tingles, and you can’t believe that you’d nearly let your best friend talk you out of this date.
‘Psychologists can be dangerous!’ Seungkwan had insisted, ‘One moment you think he’s your boyfriend, the next he’s hypnotized you to cover up a murder-’
You’d told him to stop rewatching Hannibal.
But you have to admit… Mr. Choi, or Seungcheol, as he’d called himself when he’d first messaged you, he definitely looks like Hannibal. 
Broad, handsome, tweed suit and all-
“I can see you’re thinking hard about something,” the man sitting across from you notes.
“Sorry, I was just-” you bite at your lip, “was just thinking that you’re probably really good at your job.”
His brows raise at this, and then he’s smiling, “Oh?”
“Yeah, you erm- you have a really calming voice and presence, and I mean- obviously you know what you’re talking about-”
“Are you in the market for a psychologist?” 
“No-” you answer quickly, “I mean, I don’t think so- that’s not why I matched with you at least.” 
The amused smile remains on his face, and it’s making it hard for you to look at him- 
He keeps his gaze so fixed on you, and he exudes confidence on top of the calm- 
Confidence that’s making your heart thump louder and louder in your chest-
“Hello, Mr. Choi,” the arrival of your waiter breaks the building tension you’re feeling. The question “How has your evening been so far?” confirms that Seungcheol knows the staff, and the pleasant way in which he responds tells you that you’re on a date with a good man. 
After a brief back and forth, Mr. Choi orders himself an Old Fashioned, and you ask for a gin and tonic.
Then, you’re once more alone with the man whose gaze is enough to have your pussy clenching with interest-
“I saw you were new to the site,” Seungcheol notes, and you can’t believe he’d bothered to look for that information on your profile, let alone remember it. “How’s your experience been so far?”
You take a moment to collect your thoughts before responding. “If I’m being honest, I talked to one person for a while, and when we met, he turned out to be- just- not a good person. So when you favourited me, and I thought you looked nice, I told myself it would be better to meet up in person without too much back and forth first.” 
“That sounds logical,” he agrees. “I’m sorry your first experience wasn’t what you thought it would be, but there is a silver lining, you’re here now.” 
“I’m here now,” you echo with a smile, and the waiter returns with your beverages.
Seungcheol had invited you for drinks and dessert. Seungkwan had insisted that meant drinks and sex, but your view of things is proved to be correct when Mr. Choi orders the ‘dessert tasting menu’ and the waiter scurries off again. 
“Should we make a toast?” you ask, allowing your eyes to trail over Seungcheol’s handsome face- his strong brow and pretty lips-
“We should,” he confirms, grabbing his glass and lifting it, “what would you like to toast to?”
“Being here now.”
“To being here now.” Seungcheol allows the lip of his glass to clink gently against your own before bringing it to his mouth, and you each drink to the moment.
“So,” you say when you set your cup down, “why drinks and dessert instead of dinner?”
“Dinners can be long, and full of expectations,” he tells you. “Drinks and dessert allows you to leave earlier, if you’d like to.”
“You seem like the kind of man who has everything figured out,” you muse.
The side of his mouth quirks into a charming half smile, and he leans forward slightly in his chair, assessing you with dark eyes- “Does that excite you?”
“Yes-” the word slips out before you can stop it.
The man in front of you leans back, satisfied. 
“What, exactly, are you looking for right now?” he prompts. “Your bio was… somewhat vague.”
“I guess-” you take a sip of your drink. “I guess it depends on who it is.”
“How about you start by telling me your thought process behind creating an account,” he suggests.
You’re momentarily distracted by the way his thumb rubs up and down the side of his cup- dragging through droplets of condensation gathered on the glass-
“My best friend loves Marilyn Monroe,” you find yourself saying.
This is clearly not the answer Seungcheol had expected, as he quirks that inquisitive brow of his at your words, and you’re quick to continue. 
“His favourite movie of hers is Gentlemen Prefer Blondes- and I’m not kidding, he’s been bleaching his hair since the tenth grade because of it- and there’s this quote- something like- ‘it’s just as easy to fall in love with a rich man as a poor man.’ And I just sort of thought- I’m tired of putting a lot into relationships with people who give nearly nothing in return. At least with something like this- I’d be guaranteed something- you know?”
“It sounds like you’ve spent a lot of your life trying to make other people happy,” he notes smoothly. “I can understand why you’d want to be on the receiving end. Everyone deserves reciprocation.” 
He pauses, swirling his glass, but you can tell there’s something else on his mind, and you wait on the edge of your seat for more.
“From what you’ve said,” his thumb runs up the glass again, “it sounds to me like you’re looking for a contractual type of situation, moreso than a verbal agreement. Something with that added stability.”
“That’s correct,” you nod.
The last man hadn’t ever brought up contracts or boundaries or any of the things that are mentioned when you’d looked up what sugar babying entails. 
You’re enthralled by the professional way Mr. Choi is handling himself, and you’re enjoying his crystal clear communication.
“What-” you lick your lips, “what are you looking for?” 
“As you know, I’m a psychologist,” he states. “The job comes with a lot of responsibility. I take care of a number of people with quite severe conditions, and unfortunately, regardless of my intentions, this means I’ve had less time and energy to give to people in my own life.”
He pauses to take a breath and a sip of his whisky before continuing.
“I had a fiance for a time, but it became clear to me that she wanted a child. At the time, I wasn't ready to give up my work to be present in the way a developing mind would need. I’ve been looking for a sugar baby who would understand my lifestyle. Someone to meet with once or twice a week, who would provide happy company and the emotional closeness all human beings desperately need, without some of the… expectations that traditional relationships have. Does this sound like something that could interest you?”
You find yourself quickly nodding.
“Good,” he smiles warmly at you. “I’d love to explore the exact details of a contract over drinks, and we can choose a day to do that, but for now, if you don’t mind, I think I’d like to switch the topic and focus on you a little more.”
“On me?” you blink- 
Mr. Choi’s grin widens, and the warmth meets his eyes. “Yes, you. I think it’s safe to say we’re both physically attracted to each other, but I want to know more about who you are, inside that pretty body of yours.”
You can feel your skin heating from his compliment, and you avert your gaze, grabbing at your drink to take a sip and cool yourself. “What do you want to know?”
“Let’s start with the things that make you happiest.”
Tumblr media
2: Thursday
“Look who finally decided to answer,” your best friend sighs loudly when you put him on speaker, and you can imagine his classic Seungkwan eye roll.
“I was sleeping,” you tell him, which only succeeds in earning you a scoff.
“And I have been waiting for details about your date since last night!” 
“I sent you a text saying it was good!”
“And then you put your phone on silent you whore!” your best friend screams, making you laugh at his antics- then his voice dips. “Did you fuck him?” 
“No, of course not-”
“You sound like you’re lying.”
“I’m not, I promise-” you roll onto your back and look up at your ceiling, letting out a breath. “Drinks and dessert literally meant drinks and dessert.” 
“Did he at least- I don’t know, feed you some of the dessert?”
“No.” 
“Oh.” The line is quiet for a moment. “Well that’s anti-climactic.”
You laugh. “First you wanted me going on dates with sugar daddies, then you were weird about Seungcheol, now you’re wishing I had fucked him-” 
“Well- did you enjoy yourself?”
“Yes.”
“Was he hot?”
You groan. “So fucking hot you don’t even know-” 
“Then I do wish you’d fucked him- you’re my best friend, and you deserve to get laid,” Seungkwan says plainly. “Also- I was only weird about this Seungcheol guy because he’s a therapist-”
“Psychologist.”
“Same thing- the point is, he’s a guy with power and a brain- that can be a deadly combination.” 
“I thought I told you to stop watching Hannibal,” you smile, enjoying the way Seungkwan turns everything into life or death.
He scoffs at your words, disregarding them. “So tell me about your date.”
“Like I said, it was good. I got there, we ordered drinks, he’s obviously like- super smart. We talked a little bit about why we’re on the site-”
“Why is he on the site? If he’s hot, rich, and smart?” Seungkwan asks. “Shouldn’t he be with- I don’t know… someone his own age? How old was he again?”
“Mid to late thirties- and there’s a reason for it actually. He mentioned a fiance who wanted kids- I think women ‘his age’ are all looking for a family, but he’s very… invested in his work,” you explain.
 “Oh. Huh.” You listen to the cogs in Seungkwan’s brain turning. “So- I guess he just wants a sugar baby to work around his busy schedule?”
“He’s looking for a companion-” you say, “but, you know, someone who can handle the fact that his work comes first.” 
“Right.” A beat, then; “So did you guys talk money?” 
“Seungkwan!”
“What!?” he yells back. “Quit beating around the bush!” 
“He didn’t just- whip a wad of cash out and give it to me,” you laugh. “He paid for everything of course, and we agreed to discuss a contract over drinks-”
“When?”
“Actually-” you look down at your phone, which has just buzzed, scanning the new text. “Coincidently, he’s texting me now.”
“Oooh! What’s he saying?!” 
“He said, ‘I really enjoyed your company last night. Would you like to join me for drinks tomorrow at eight?’” 
“Wow, this dude works fast- are you sure you didn’t suck him off or anything?”
“Seungkwan!” 
“I just mean- two dates in three days- this is fast.”
“Yeah well,” you shrug while texting out a confirmation response for Seungcheol, “if you’d seen Mr. Choi in person, you’d be hoping things go fast too.”
“Is he really that sexy? This isn’t just- your old man kink?”
“I dont have an old man kink-”
“Sure you don’t.”
You groan. “Seungkwan, just trust me. This man-” you swallow thickly, “he could choke me out- and I’d say thank you daddy.”
“Right, but let’s hope he doesn’t though.” 
Tumblr media
3: Friday
Part of you isn’t surprised that Seungcheol has a study in his home, but another part of you wonders if this man is really someone you should be entertaining, with his shelves of psychology texts and autobiographies written by renowned people in his field- and the framed degrees and papers of certification-
Seungcheol is the real deal; it’s clear as day and reflected in his home.
He gives you a tour of the main floor, moving from the study to the dining room, and despite your ardent attempt at listening- it’s hard to focus. 
If he’d been godlike in the charcoal tweed suit when you’d first met him- well, you don’t even know how to describe how well he fits into a plain white dress shirt, sleeves rolled up to expose strong, bulky forearms- and then there’s the way the material stretches over his deliciously broad shoulders every time he turns his back to you-
“Now that I’ve given you a small tour, why don’t you take a seat,” he says as you enter his kitchen. “And I’ll grab us drinks. What are you feeling? Wine, water, beer, champagne-”
“Whatever you think is best,” you tell him, a little overwhelmed by the effect his home is having on you- 
The effect he is having on you. 
“I think I’d like to give you champagne,” he says, turning his back to you to open his fridge.
You find yourself nearly drooling at the brief moments you’re able to gawk at his shoulders again- and when he faces you, your eyes immediately zero in on his hands as they begin to fiddle with the bottle-
“Has anyone ever talked you through opening a bottle of champagne before?” he asks.
Your eyes meet briefly and you feel your skin heat when you admit, “not really- is there a specific way to do it?”
“I’m not sure if there’s one specific way,” Seungcheol chuckles a little, looking down at his task. “At ceremonies, sometimes they’ll use a sword and knock the top of the neck clean off- but for our purposes, and to avoid breaking anything with the cork if it shoots off, I prefer utilizing the cork cage,” he runs his fingers across the metal contraption on top of the bottle. “The trick is to unwind it most of the way, but keep it on so when you manuever the cork up-” his thumb runs along the seem, working at it- “it pops,” there’s a loud sound, “but it gets caught by the cork cage, and then, both are easily removed.”
He’d done the motion so professionally- a man who’s opened many a champagne bottle in his time. 
Seungcheol seems to be an expert of everything - a true wealth of knowledge - and it’s one of the sexiest things you’ve ever experienced. 
You watch him pour two glasses of the bubbly liquid, and then he gingerly slides one across the marble island countertop, “I think you’ll enjoy this.”
He watches you with an amused expression while you raise the champagne to your lips, and when your eyes widen at the taste, he grins.
“It’s really good,” you say, toying with the stem of your glass. 
Now it’s your turn to watch him take a sip- and you’re blown away by how sexy he can be while simply drinking- his adam’s apple bobbing-
You wanna lick his neck.
You wanna lick his neck so bad-
“Should we get down to business?” he asks.
You wanna get down on something- and it’s not business. 
“Er- yes, we should,” you agree, shifting the way you’re seated on the bar stool at his counter-
Your panties are sticking to your core and it’s a little uncomfortable- 
You have no idea how this night is going to pan out, no idea if you’ll actually end up in his bed- so you’ve worn a beautiful, silky, matching set- its one drawback is the way the material sticks to  you when you’re even slightly aroused- and you’ve been aroused since the moment Seungcheol opened the door to his home and invited you in.
“Since this is a contract we’re making together, I held myself back from writing one up,” he explains. “I was thinking we could discuss it verbally, and I’ll write up a copy of what we’ve talked about after you go home tonight-” 
You feel your expression fall a little and Seungcheol pauses, expert eyes assessing you. 
“Is something wrong?” he asks.
“No,” you assure him, swallowing thickly and averting your gaze, “that sounds like a good idea.”
There are a few more moments of silence, and then Seungcheol rests both hands on the countertop, leaning forward, voice dipping when he says, “Darling, as much as I’d love for you to stay over tonight, I promised myself I wouldn’t fuck you until the third date.” 
Your skin feels electrified, and you gawk at the gorgeous man, who looks down at you with an amused grin.
You nearly shock yourself when the words “why not?” tumble past your lips, and his affectionate smile widens at your question.
“We’ve hardly discussed expectations,” he answers smoothly. “It would be… unwise for me to skip those important steps, to give you time to consider your options.”
“My options?”
“I am older than you,” he points out, “and there’s still a chance you might decide you want someone who can give you more of his time. I want you to be sure about all of this.”
“I am sure,” you insist.
“You think you are,” he muses, bringing his champagne to his lips, “but until you see a finalized document, you shouldn’t be agreeing to anything.”
“You won’t hurt me-” you tell him, “I trust you.”
“Although we only just met,” he points out. “If you trust me at all, trust in this process, okay, Sweetheart?”
You swallow any words of insistence that threaten to bubble up out of you, nodding and taking a sip of your own drink.
“So,” he lets out a sigh, “we discussed a few of my expectations when we first met, do you remember what they were?”
“You were looking for a companion of sorts, who could manage you being at work frequently,” you respond, feeling pleased when he nods and smiles at you. “Someone to meet up with once or twice a week.”
“Very good, Angel,” he praises you. “While it’s implied, I’d like to solidify what you might call a key condition.”
You’re practically on the edge of your seat, waiting for him to continue, your interest piqued.
“Any contract you’d sign would come with a loyalty clause.” He pauses for a moment, eyes searching your own. “Do you understand what that entails?”
“I think so,” you nod. “It would be an agreement that while I’m seeing you, I wouldn’t be entertaining anyone else. We’d be exclusive.”
“That’s my smart girl,” he smiles. “Even though I don’t have much time for you, I’d provide for you to live comfortably when I’m not around, in the hopes that, when we are together, we’re both committed to making the best of it.” 
You love the way that sounds.
“Which brings me to my next point,” he continues, “monthly allowances. I’ll cover your food, rent, utilities- anything you need, and provide extra spending money for clothing, jewelry, etcetera.” 
“Wow, that’s-” you feel your eyes widening, “that’s very generous of you.”
“It’s really not,” he insists. “You’re a beautiful, bright, young woman, and you’re agreeing to be a companion to some middle aged psych nut who hardly has enough time for you-” you both laugh a little at the way he refers to himself, “compensation is a must.”
You have to stop yourself from happily chirping an ‘if you say so daddy’ at the man that is so close to becoming everything you’ve ever wanted for yourself-
“On top of our one-on-one interactions,” Seungcheol says, “I’d also like for you to accompany me to professional events, but I’d need you to be discreet. On top of a loyalty clause, I might have you sign a nondisclosure act- how does that sound to you?”
You consider it for a moment. “I’m not the type to go tell people about my personal life- and other than my best friend, no one even knows I was on the sugar site-”
“Your friend who loves Marilyn Monroe and bleaches his hair?” Seungcheol asks with an amused expression.
“You remembered-” you laugh, heart warming to know how many details he’s held onto in regard to your first meeting.
“The NDA can exclude your close friend, we all need a confidant.”
“Thank you,” you swallow, “I think- if it allows me to talk to Seungkwan, signing a NDA would be okay.”
“Perfect,” Seungcheol nods, drinking the last of his champagne. “We’ve covered a few of the most important parts of an agreement, so I think maybe now is a good time to grab another important document that I need you to look over.”
“Oh?”
“Stay here for a moment, I’ll be right back,” Seungcheol assures you, flashing you a quick wink before exiting the kitchen.
It’s almost torturous to be alone anywhere in Seungcheol’s home without him, and part of you is inclined to follow him around like a lost, needy puppy-
You finish your drink while you wait, taking breaths to calm yourself, afterall, he’d said he wouldn’t be fucking you tonight- therefore, there’s not much for you to worry about.
Seungcheol returns shortly, holding a dark leather file folder, which he offers to you.
“What’s this?” you ask, not wanting to open it without being prompted to- but your curiosity is as high as ever.
“Separate from our sugar agreement, this is a bdsm contract. It has a list of kinks and other things, as well as a section for you to fill out, detailing what you’re comfortable - and more importantly - what you’re uncomfortable with. I’d like you to take it home, look it over, and if you have any questions, let me know.”
“Right-” you stand up, holding the file folder to your chest-
Any words that you were thinking of saying disappear when you look up at Seungcheol, once more marveling at your size difference and how beautiful he is-
“You’re easily distractable,” he grins, pinching at your chin gently, “aren’t you, Angel?”
“Yes sir,” you mumble-
Easily dazed too.
“My driver will take you home now,” the (much too sexy) psychologist tells you. “His name is Seokmin, you’ll probably have to remind him to give you his number. He’ll be available to you from now on if you need to go anywhere.”
“You have a driver?” you blink- shocked at how he’s able to afford all of this-
You realize he must come from old money- and you’re appalled you hadn’t noticed it before.
He doesn’t carry himself in the way a man who’d made a name for himself would- he has an air of confidence- a confidence that runs deep and is backed up by family money.
“Yes, darling,” Seungcheol grins, “we have a driver.”
Tumblr media
4: Saturday
You’ve always loved having movie night with your best friend, but tonight, he’s not interested in movies. Seungkwan is easily distractable - a little like you, you suppose - and when you’d arrived over an hour ago, he’d immediately insisted on knowing every detail about your experience with the man he now refers to as ‘Psych daddy.’
On top of being distractable, Seunkwan is easy to please, and you manage to avoid mentioning the BDSM contract for a good long while, instead focusing on Seungcheol’s hot driver, who Seungkwan finds on instagram within five minutes.
“No way- first Psych Daddy is a ten out of ten, and now his driver is hot too?” Seungkwan bellows while mad scrolling through Seokmin’s profile. “Are you sure we’re not in some weird porn dream? You’re not gonna get tag teamed are you?”
“Seungkwan!” you scream, gently smacking him across the shoulder in shock.
“We were both thinking it!” he insists, shoving you back.
“I’ll have you know that we were not both thinking it,” you state with just as much certainty. 
“But you mentioned how nice the guy was when he dropped you off last night and we called for like five minutes before you hung up on me to go to bed!”
“Yeah, in the context that Seungcheol is really nice to everyone that works for him, despite being-”
“One of the youngest, sexiest psych daddies in the city, yeah, yeah-” Seungkwan waves his hand, “Stop rubbing it in.”
“Have you been researching my boyfriend again?” you ask, thoroughly amused.
“Boyfriend?” Seunkwan eyes you up and down, sneering. “Is that what we call dom daddies now?” 
“If he makes you sign a loyalty clause and a NDA, I think I can call him whatever I want, can’t I?” you point out. “And you avoided my question- you’ve definitely been googling Cheol again.”
“Been googling myself to pictures of pysch daddy-” Seungkwan says suggestively before asking, “He made you sign an NDA?”
“Not yet,” you sigh, “and don’t worry, we’ve discussed it and it will exclude you- I can tell you anything I want to.”
“Shit, did you tell him my name? Do you think he’ll accept me as a patient if he knows I’m your best friend?”
“Since when do you need a psychologist?” you laugh.
“Uh,” Seungkwan’s brows raise, “Bestie, have you seen my life? I definitely need someone to confide in who knows what the fuck he’s talking about.”
“Ouch,” you touch your heart, pretending to be wounded. “Since when did you not like crack gremlin advice?”
“Since you put down your crack gremlin hat and became a sugar baby to a hot psychologist,” Seungkwan sighs, taking one last look at Seokmin’s grinning face before he puts his phone down and focuses entirely on you. “But go back a few steps and talk to me about this loyalty clause- psych daddy sends you home with a ton of papers to sign, huh?”
“More than you could imagine.”
Your best friend looks you up and down with suspicion, brow raising in a silent prompt for more info.
When you remain quiet, Seungkwan sighs. “Fine, don’t tell me,” but after a beat, he asks, “Was it a sex list or something?”
You’re always stunned by how intuitive your best friend can be.
Upon reading your reaction, Seungkwan’s eyes widen and he grabs at your arm, nearly jumping with excitement. “No way!” he yells in your ear. “He did send you home with a sex list! Show me, show me, show me!” 
You look to your bag and before you can even reach for it, Seungkwan is darting past you and retrieving the papers. “Holy shit-” he breathes, scanning the document with eyes full of something like perverted excitement. “A checklist for kinks?”
“Yup.”
“Choking, yes. Spanking, fuck yeah- bondage-” he grins at you, “looks like someone’s a little slut for psych daddy.”
“Oh my god,” you groan, reaching for the papers, but he launches himself off the couch to evade you. “If you’re gonna be like this, I don’t want to show you.”
“Fine, I’ll be nice,” Seungkwan says, but he’s still reading the list, and his voice is lacking any real sincerity. “Okay so most of these are straightforward-”
“You watch way too much porn,” you sigh.
He practically growls at you. “As I was saying- most of these are straightforward, and you’ve filled out the ones I would have expected you to- but some of these are things even I have never heard of- like, what the fuck is…” he carefully sounds out the next word, “Quirofilia?”
“Honestly- the ones I didn’t know about, I just sort of skipped over, hoping maybe you would know- but…” you can’t stop the sly grin that works its way onto your lips, “I guess Cheol did say I could call him if I had any questions…”
“At this point, it’s almost like this list is purposefully vague on some kinks-” Seungkwan sighs, joining you on the couch again. “I bet Psych daddy has been waiting for you to call him for extra clarification.”
“We could google it,” you point out.
“Definitely not,” Seungkwan says quickly. “Call daddy, and put him on speaker.”
“Oh, so he’s just daddy now?” you tease, pulling out your phone. 
“Call him.”
“Hmm… maybe I’ll text,” you decide. “He could be busy.”
“That’s no fun,” Seunkwan whines, pouting out his lower lip.
“Too bad,” you tell him, typing in a quick message. “I said, ‘hey, whenever you have time, I have a few questions about some of the terms on the kink list.’”
“Add a smiley face,” your friend urges, “so he knows it’s like- good questions.”
You add a happy emoji, and hit send. Then you put your phone down, reaching for the papers from Seungkwan. 
“He might not answer anytime soon-” you say- just as your phone buzzes the familiar ringtone that you’ve only given to one person.
Both you and Seungkwan stare at your ringing phone, and then your best friend grins at you. 
“This guy is so whipped for you it’s crazy- are you sure you haven’t sucked his dick?”
“Oh my god stop!” you groan, “and be quiet or I can’t answer-”
“I’ll be quiet,” he insists, pretending to lock his mouth shut and throw away the key.
With one final warning glare, you turn your focus to your phone, answering the call. “Hello?” 
“Hey, gorgeous,” comes Seungcheol’s unmistakable smooth drawl- god, he makes your mouth fucking water- “So you got around to looking at the kink list.”
He’s so god damned confident- and when you look up at Seungkwan, you see he’s just as shook by your new lover as you are.
“Uh, yes,” you clear your throat. “There are just a few terms I’m unfamiliar with, and- I know I could look them up, but you said to call you if I had questions-”
“Of course Angel, I’d love to help talk you through it.”
Your panties are wet.
They’re wet, and your best friend is nearly falling off the couch from how seductive your new sugar daddy is.
“What kinks are you unfamiliar with?” Seungcheol prompts, and you can practically hear him smiling at the way he’s taking your breath away on a freaking phone call- 
“There’s this one,” your eyes scan over the word Quirofilia, and you do your best not to mangle it the way Seungkwan had when you relay it to Cheol.
“Quirofilia,” he repeats, teaching you the proper pronunciation with the calm, pleasant tone you’re starting to fall in love with. “It’s another term for a hand kink.”
Now it’s your turn to echo, and you say “A hand kink,” while blinking at your friend.
“Yes, angel,” Seungcheol chuckles on the other end. “If you check off the box for receiving, you’d indicate that you’d be more than comfortable with me touching you frequently. For lack of a better term, it goes hand in hand with a number of other kinks- spanking and choking for example, or finger sucking.”
“And for giving?” you question, having already checked off a yes for what he’s just described.
“For giving…” he clears his throat, “well, you’d let me pay for you to get manicures- maybe let me choose the colours and styles-” there’s another pause, then “I have to admit, I did notice that you have nice hands the first night we met.”
“Really?” your heart lurches in your chest and Seungkwan grabs a pillow to bite while listening in on a conversation that’s getting sexier and sexier- “What did you like about them?”
“They’re smaller than mine, for one. I’m sure we can both imagine how pretty they’d look wrapped around something… substantially bigger.” 
Your best friend spasms, practically screaming into the pillow, and you can’t help the way your own jaw drops at the statement- 
Are you about to have phone sex with Cheol in front of your best friend?
Do you need to get a room?
“We can discuss it in detail when I see you next,” Seungcheol says, cutting off your horny thoughts. “Are there any other kinks you’ve had trouble with?”
“I mean-” part of you wants to go through the whole list and pretend not to know things just to keep him on the phone- “if we’re going to discuss these all in detail when I see you next- maybe I should just wait till then?”
You can’t believe you’re cock blocking yourself just because Seungkwan is here.
“We can do that,” Seungcheol says smoothly. 
In the background, you hear someone say his name, and you find yourself asking, “did I catch you at a bad time?” suddenly worried you’ve interrupted something important.
“Of course not, angel, I wouldn’t have called you if I couldn’t step away for a few minutes.” There’s a pause then, “I’m at a conference this weekend, flew out this morning.”
“Oh,” your heart deflates a little.
“I was tempted to invite you,” Seungcheol says, calming the uneasiness you’re feeling. “But seeing as you’ve not signed anything, and I already had plans with colleagues, I figured this wouldn’t be the best first trip to take you on.”
This excites you again. “Do you have somewhere specific in mind for a first trip?”
“Somewhere warm,” he answers smoothly, a small chuckle following a moment later. “Anyways, I won’t be that available tomorrow, you caught me at a good moment tonight.”
“Well… will you be back on Monday?” you question.
Another small laugh, then, “Are you that eager to see me, gorgeous?”
“Maybe.” You eye Seungkwan who’s still screaming into the pillow. “But I mean- I remember what you said about needing a sugar baby that fits your schedule, so, I don’t want to pressure you to see me the day you get back from a work conference-”
“That’s very thoughtful of you, angel,” his smooth voice calms your anxieties. “I do have quite a busy week, a few things aren’t pinned down yet, can I let you know when I have more details?”
“Yes, of course-” you bite at your lip. “I should let you get back to your colleagues- thanks for calling me and talking me through uh- Quirofilia.”
You hear him take a deep breath, and then, Seungcheol lets out something like a groan- “I’m tempted to ask what you checked off for it.”
His words go straight to your pussy and after a moment of silence you ask, “Do you want me to tell you?”
“No,” he responds, “It will give me something to think about tonight if you don’t tell me.”
“Okay,” you grin at the way he’s toying with himself- ego fuelled by the idea of him thinking about you- “I’m excited to talk more about this with you when I see you next.”
“Me too, angel.”
“Have a great time at your conference daddy.” 
You slap a hand over your mouth, eyes widening at the way the term of endearment just slipped out of you-
Seungcheol lets out a deep sigh that betrays how much the word has affected him, and he sounds less composed than normal when he says, “Thank you, precious, enjoy your evening.”
You hang up, and as soon as you have, Seungkwan goes ballistic, practically pouncing at you while screaming, “That was too sexy! You guys are too sexy, what the hell!?”
Laughing at his antics is easy- pretending your panties aren’t ruined is another story.
Tumblr media
5: Sunday
The ringtone that makes your whole body tingle with anticipation is becoming more and more familiar, and you practically launch yourself across your bed to answer your phone.
“Hi.”
A small chuckle, and a breath, then, “Hey you.”
“How's your conference going?” you ask, having not expected to hear from Cheol today.
“Good. It’s over, we finished the last meet up just before dinner. What are you up to?”
You grin to yourself, playing with the book in your lap. “I’m reading your most recent publication.”
“My most recent publication?” you can hear him smiling now too, and you enjoy the way he teases your choice of phrase. “Since when were you going out and buying my books, darling?”
“Since I saw how many you’ve done- when you showed me your library. I went out this morning and got two.”
“You could have asked, and I would have given you them for free… with a detailed note from the author.” 
“I was eager to begin reading,” you admit. “And you’re so busy- I’m still not sure when I’m seeing you next.”
“That’s actually why I called. I took a look at my schedule, and I’ve got options for you.”
“Ooh! I love options.” 
Another smile you can hear through the phone, and your heart beats a little faster. 
“I can see you alone on Friday, it’s the earliest day I have available- but if you’d like, you can accompany me to a get-together with my work colleagues on Wednesday. I know you haven’t signed any papers and we haven’t discussed anything in detail yet but… I have a good feeling about you, angel, and I’d enjoy having you there.”
“Then of course I’ll go with you to the get-together,” you announce, grinning like a school girl at the inklings of praise he bestows on you.
“That’s wonderful news, gorgeous.” - you love it when he calls you pretty pet names - “I’m sorry that this call can’t be longer- but I’ll see you Wednesday- and I’m sure I’ll find a reason to call you before then.”
“Yes, please.” 
He laughs, and the sound has your core buzzing with interest- how the hell is Seungcheol so sexy without even trying?
“Have a good night, angel, and don’t read too much of my book- they’re all depressing.”
“They’re informative,” you insist. “Have a wonderful night Cheol, and thanks for calling.”
Tumblr media
6: Monday
“Hi.” 
You’ve gotta stop answering your phone with a full grin- but every time Seungcheol calls you, you can’t help but get warm and fuzzy all over.
“Hi, angel.” 
And wet. Wet all over. 
Wet where it counts.
“I was just thinking about you,” you confess, toying with the page of his book that you’ve been reading.
“Funny, I was just thinking about you,” he responds, “and I have been, all day. It’s quite distracting actually.”
“Really?” Your heart leaps again.
“I was thinking about getting you something to wear to the party on Wednesday- was going to get Seokmin to drop it off at your place, but then… I realized how much I’d rather see you and give you the dress in person, to see your reaction.”
This man gives you full on heart palpitations- and it takes everything in you to clear your throat and ask, “so does this mean I’ll see you before Wednesday, or?”
“I mean… I don’t want to assume you’re free every night- but if you’re not otherwise busy tomorrow-”
“I always have time for you daddy,” you smile, “and I’ll sign a contract to prove it.”
He lets out a shaky breath, and you love that you’re having an effect on him. “That’s good to hear sweetheart. I’ll move a few things around. How does seven sound?”
“Seven sounds perfect.”
“And it will be a longer stay this time. I know I kept our last interaction at my home brief- but if you bring all the documents I gave you, we can…” he clears his throat, “discuss them in full, tomorrow, if you’d like”
“I’d love that,” you admit.
“Seokmin will be at your place to pick you up at seven then, angel. I can’t wait to see you.”
“I can’t wait either.”
Tumblr media
7: Tuesday
Seungcheol is a man who strives for perfection. From his home and work, all the way down to the pretty present he’s gotten for you, the box wrapped in a golden bow-
And when you open your gift to reveal an expensive red fabric just itching to be touched- you think there’s a possibility that you might very much be in love with the psychologist already.
“It’s beautiful-” you breathe, pulling the silky garment from its box to assess the length and style.
“You were wearing red when we first met,” Seungcheol tells you, “I thought to myself that I’d never seen such a gorgeous girl- when I invited you to the gettogether tomorrow, I knew there was only one colour I truly wanted to see you in.”
Your heart is having palpitations, you swear- 
“Do you-” you swallow thickly, looking up at him, “do you want me to try it on for you now?” 
It’s his turn to take a shaky breath, and after a stagnant pause, he shakes his head, “No. I think I’d like to be surprised tomorrow- besides, after we get done looking over the papers and contracts, I feel as if we’d both prefer you to be taking off clothes rather than putting them on.” 
He’s right about that.
You only wish you’d known about his affinity for the color red before you’d chosen a black lingerie set, knowing that tonight would be the night he’d finally strip you bare-
You can’t wait for him to fuck you. You honestly can’t- and all these paper signings- they’re just a formality for you. 
As far as you’re concerned, Cheol is the one- or at least, he could be the one. 
Or maybe he’s just the ‘for now,’ but regardless, for now, you want to be ravenously fucking him-
“My easily distractable darling,” he gently pinches at your chin, pulling you from your dirty thoughts. “Let’s see the papers.”
After putting the dress back in its box, you grab the purse you’d arrived with. It’s large enough to hold the folder with the documents, which you pull out next, setting it down on Seungcheol’s kitchen counter. 
“I see you’ve printed out the other documents I sent you since we last met,” he says, and you can hear the pride in his voice that you’d gone a step above and beyond what he’d asked of you. 
After your last date, wherein you’d gotten the kink list, he’d sent you an email with a link to a contractual pdf. Once you’d gone over the contract in detail on your computer, you’d printed it out, eager to sign your name- but you’d been patient, knowing he’d probably want to witness your signature being jotted down on the dotted line.
“I’m ready to sign them,” you tell him, also pulling a pen out of your purse-
“Eager angel,” he smiles, taking the seat on the barstool next to yours. “Are you sure you don’t want to read it all over one more time?”
“I’m sure,” you tell him, angling your body towards his and fiddling with your pen. 
“Alright,” Seungcheol nods, rolling up the sleeves of his white button-down, his forearms flexing. “How about you let me sign first, then you can do your own signature.”
You hold out your pen, which he accepts, and you watch the way he adjusts his glasses on the bridge of his nose when he looks down at the contract. His eyes scan over the document, and a moment later, the ballpoint pen is gliding languidly across the dotted line, his signature solidified in a binding agreement. 
“There we go,” he says smoothly, holding the pen out for you to take.
Within seconds, two signatures are on the contract, and your heart is racing just a little faster in anticipation of what’s to come next.
“And now to look over your kink list,” Seungcheol breathes, moving the signed papers to the side. 
Your heart lurches when he picks up the sheet you’ve filled in, and you stay silent while his eyes move over each line of information. 
“As much as these all interest me,” he says, “I’m pleased to see you’ve checked off giving and receiving for quirofilia.” His large hand moves to rest on top of your thigh, and he gives you a gentle squeeze, eyes shifting from the paper to your own. “Will you allow me to book a manicure for you tomorrow? In preparation for the get-together?”
“Yes, please,” you rest your hand on top of his own.
“We’ll have to get your nails matching your new dress,” he tells you smoothly, setting the paper down in favour of pushing a strand of hair away from your face, his index finger gently gliding past your cheekbone. “And there will be another present for you tomorrow.”
“Another?” you’re nearly dizzy from how well he treats you-
“Another,” he confirms, taking off his glasses to set down before standing from the bar stool. 
“Are you going to tell me what it is?” you ask, allowing him to prompt you to your own feet, both of his hands gently capturing your own.
Seungcheol gives his head a small shake, a smile on his lips when he responds with a “no.”
Something inside of you deflates slightly at the fact that he’s withholding information from you, and you can’t help the way you pout your lower lip out - just a little - in an effort to perhaps make him change his mind-
“Come on, angel,” Seungcheol laughs, pinching your chin and forcing you to look up at him. His dark chocolate colored eyes are swimming with adoration, and his small half smile is breathtaking- “you can be patient for one more day, can’t you?”
“Depends what for,” you admit, reaching your free hand out to hook your fingers in the front of his belt, pulling yourself closer to the man who’s as solid as any brick wall you’ve ever seen-
“Patience for the next present,” he clarifies, gaze dipping down to your lips as you move even closer to him- “not for anything else.”
“Promise?” you ask, pushing onto your tip toes- mouths even closer-
“Promise,” Seungcheol says, finally closing the distance between you.
His lips are soft- he’s a gentleman, and his hand moves from your chin to be cupping the nape of your neck, the other smoothing down to the small of your back. 
It’s chaste kissing- too chaste for you, and you wrap your arms around the back of his own neck, pressing your chest up against his.
You don’t want any more distance between you, and you especially don’t want to wait any longer for this man to fuck the ever-loving shit out of you.
“Cheol-” you groan, allowing him to tilt your head and slide his tongue along your lower lip.
“Yes, angel?” His voice is so deep and sexy, the vibrations of it going straight through from his chest to your own and then down to your tingling core-
“Daddy, please-” 
“I would ask you to use your words, but now that you’ve filled out your kink list-” he swallows thickly, gently pressing his forehead to yours, “I think I have a pretty good idea of what you’d enjoy.”
In the back of your mind, you remember that you’d said yes to most of the kinks on the list- so you’re not sure how - exactly - he’s going to narrow it down and decide on what to do to you today- but there’s another part of you that trusts him fully.
Tonight is going to be a night to remember, regardless of what kinks he fulfills for you.
“Wait-” your hands move from his strong shoulders to the front of his dress shirt, toying with the buttons there, “I never saw your kink list.”
“Would you like to?”
You nod.
“Another time then,” Seungcheol says smoothly, “tonight, I want to take care of you. How’s that sound?”
“Sounds good,” you admit, tugging on his shirt in an effort to pull him closer.
With a smile, Seungcheol concedes, lips finding yours again. 
Instead of being as chaste as he had at the start, with each brush of your mouths against each other, he’s becoming more bold, gently testing your limits-
Little does he know that when it comes to him, you have no hard limits.
He could talk you into just about anything- but part of you knows he’d never really try to talk you into much, which is one of the reasons why you’re so open for him.
As he kisses you harder, and you tug him even closer, you realize you’re practically trying to climb him- and in one motion, Seungcheol bends down and lifts you into his arms bridal style, being mindful of the black dress still adorning your body.
“I’m going to take you to my bedroom now,” he tells you, and you take the opportunity to begin speckling his neck and underjaw in kisses, your hands tugging and toying with the fabric covering his broad shoulders. 
It’s so easy to become lost in him- his gentle, calming aura truly overtakes you, and now that you’re contractually under his protection - both financially and romantically - nothing else does matter- 
Nothing except him.
You want to make Seungcheol happy- and you note his reactions, note the way he releases a shuddery breath when you find a sensitive spot just under his ear- your tongue dipping out to taste his skin while you press kisses there-
“Okay, angel,” he sighs, “time to set you down.” 
He places you gently onto his bed before straightening to look at you. 
Seungcheol has always been tall and broad- but towering over you at the foot of his bed while you lay there with soaked panties takes him to new heights - literally - and you find yourself practically drooling- sitting up in an effort to get close to him again-
“Nuh uh uh,” he tuts, pressing one knee onto the mattress between your legs. “Lift your arms so I can take this dress off of you, and then lay back down for me, yeah?”
You follow through with his request gladly, allowing him to strip you of your dress before you flatten against his bed again, looking up at him with a lustful wonder that you’ve never truly experienced.
“There’s my pretty girl,” Seungcheol says smoothly, discarding your dress before looking down at you with appreciative eyes- eyes that finally take in some of your best features, gliding across your breasts and the lingerie set you’re wearing- “You dressed up for me,” he notes.
“Of course, daddy,” you sigh, reaching for him when he presses his other knee onto the bed, “wanted to look good for you.”
“You always look good,” he tells you, flattening his form over your own, one hand pressed to the mattress next to your head while the other gently grasps your jaw. “My pretty little angel,” he says, breath fanning across your skin before his lips find your own.
You wrap your legs around his waist, pulling him closer and looking for friction between your thighs-
A moan slips out of you when you feel his cock, pressing against the front of his pants deliciously-
Seungcheol chuckles into your kiss before pulling away from you, his lips moving to your neck- 
“So sensitive, baby,” he says, rutting forward ever so slightly- cock dragging past your panty-clad core and making you groan again. “When was the last time you were properly touched?”
“It’s been a while,” you admit, swallowing thickly and lacing your fingers through Seungcheol’s hair while he kisses down to the swell of your breasts, still captured in your bra. 
“Well, we’re going to change that.”
“We better,” you retort, back already arching off the bed to give him access to the clasp of your bra- which he undoes with deft fingers. “Take it off- please-”
The garment slips off of you easily, and Seungcheol tosses it to join your dress on the floor before his large, warm hand is cupping your breast, lips attaching to one nipple while his fingers toy with the other.
Small gasps of ecstasy escape you, filling the room with your whimpery sounds of need.
Your new lover focuses on your breasts in a way that begins to make you frustrated, your pussy clenching with untouched desire- and the feeling of Seungcheol’s muscled shoulders is almost too much for your hands, which can’t help but explore his body-
“Please-” you moan, shifting your hips up, eager for him to grind down on you again-
The hand on your breast is removed, and it slips between your bodies, two fingers pressing to your pussy through your panties. 
You release a whimper, body shuddering at the small stimulus on your clit-
“Your panties are soaked, angel,” he says, releasing your breast in favor of looking down at you again. “Do you really need me that much?” 
“I do,” you tell him sincerely, once more tugging at the front of his shirt. “I need you so bad-”
Your fingers begin to undo his buttons, but your motions are shaky, especially as he rubs your core harder, teasing you through your panties-
“Please- just take them off,” you groan. “Take it all off-”
Seungcheol grins, “If you insist,” and then he’s pulling away from you, leaving you cold and desperate, your hands trying to follow him-
But then you stop, zoning in on the way his own nimble fingers undo the buttons of his shirt-
And then he’s shrugging the fabric off, revealing a chiseled torso and an abdomen that you could wash clothes on-
“You’re so-” you groan, unable to even believe you’d found a man like this on a sugar dating site.
“I’m so…” he looks at you with a cocked brow, kneeling between your legs, his hands finding your thighs and smoothing down against your skin.
“You’re everything,” you tell him, unable to think through much else.
The complement works, and Seungcheol’s smile widens. “Thank you, angel,” he says. “Daddy’s going to eat you now.”
You’re so overwhelmed- in the best of ways- that you hardly even hear Seungkwan’s voice in the back of your mind screaming ‘hannibal the cannibal, bitch!’ 
Your best friend had been so wrong about Seungcheol- who gets down onto his knees at the foot of the bed, dragging you closer before hooking his fingers in your panties-
You lift your hips, allowing him to tug the fabric from your form, leaving you completely naked-
Seungcheol releases a breath that fans over your pussy, his lips pressing a wet kiss on your inner thigh.
“You’re so perfect,” he says, teeth grazing past your skin before he finally brings his mouth where you need him most.
You can’t help but reach down and tangle your fingers through his hair, determined to keep him between your thighs-
And he doesn’t disappoint, tongue licking you up and down, pressing through your pussy lips and dipping into your core, nose brushing by your clit-
“Cheol-” you whimper, toes curling at the sensation.
You’ve been eaten out before, but you’ve never been as into a man as you are with Seungcheol, and every brush of him against you has you practically whining and tingling with ecstasy.
You’d never thought sex could be this good- and he hasn’t even fucked you yet.
His tongue is nothing compared to what his cock is going to feel like- but his mouth alone is bringing you shockingly close to your high, devastatingly fast. 
Seungcheol releases a groan against your pussy, pulling away just enough to ask “close already, angel?”
“Mmm- yes,” you whimper, tightening your grip in his hair on an effort to bring him back to your pussy.
“You can cum, just- let me know,” he tells you, tongue returning to your aching hole, lapping at you for all you’re worth-
You find your eyes closing, your head resting back against his bed while his ministrations work you closer and closer to the edge-
One of your feet drags along his strong back, your legs threatening to close around his head as your sounds of pleasure begin to tumble out of you uncensored, filling the room-
Seungcheol presses his face against you even harder, lips wrapping around your clit-
“Cheol- I’m gonna-” you whine, breaths becoming irregular as you get closer and closer to cloud nine- “oh my god-” you reach the peak of pleasure, and a gasped “daddy” escapes you as you’re consumed with your orgasm, quivering legs trying to close around Seungcheol-
But two hands land on your inner thighs, forcing you open for the man who eats you through your high like he’s been starved- 
Perhaps you both have.
You haven’t felt something this good in- maybe ever, and all you’re able to do is tug on his hair, moan loudly, and rut your hips against his face while you feel him tingling through every fiber of your being.
Seungcheol works you through your entire orgasm and then some, until your legs feel like jelly from being tensed, and you can hardly breathe correctly. Then, he pulls away from you slowly, pressing kisses along your inner thigh-
You open your eyes to look down at him, and you’re met with a visual that has you getting wet all over again. 
The gorgeous man between your legs, wipes his thumb across his lower lip, collecting what’s there and slipping it into his mouth, releasing a groan that has you practically twitching- 
His pupils are blown with interest, and he’s breathing just as heavily as you are.
He stands up, towering over you once more.
Seungcheol swallows thickly, running a hand through his hair. “I’m guessing from the way you checked off cum play and breeding kink that you’re on some sort of contraceptive?”
You release a small laugh- no man has ever used the word contraceptive in the bedroom with you before. Cheol is so sexy with his fancy words-
“Hey,” he gently taps your inner thigh again, “are you alright?”
“Yes, I-” you take a breath, “sorry, I’m just-” you can’t help but reach for him, making something like grabby hands in the air.
“I’ll give you a second to come down a bit more,” he concedes, returning between your legs, holding himself just over your body while you attempt to latch onto him, ankles crossing behind his back to lock him in- “You really haven’t been properly touched in a while,” he notes, brushing your hair out of your face and behind your ear. 
“No,” you agree, “I haven’t.” 
You cup his face, eager for his lips to be on yours, but he holds just out of your reach, grinning down at you. “Almost ready to answer my question?”
You nod, taking a breath before telling him, “I’m on the pill.”
“Lucky us,” Seungcheol says, bypassing your lips in favour of pressing a kiss to your neck, just above your fluttering pulse point. “How are you feeling?”
“Good,” you admit, letting out a deep sigh- “needy.”
Seungcheol releases a small groan, and he pushes his hips forward, teasing your bare core with the front of his dress pants- “Yeah?” 
“Please-” you tug gently at his hair, “stop teasing me.”
“Just trying to let you take a breath,” he retorts.
“I don’t want to breathe,” you say stubbornly, “I want you.” 
He lets out a chuckle, and you find yourself wanting to prove how much you want him. 
There’s no way in hell that you’ll be able to dominate Seungcheol, he’s as sturdy as a bear laying on top of you, but when you push at his shoulders, he relents, allowing you to roll him onto his back so you’re now the one on top.
He blinks up at you, lips parting-
“Didn’t expect this, did you, daddy?” you ask, placing your palms flat on his chest while adjusting the way you’re seated, capturing his cock between your bodies-
Seungcheol sits up abruptly- and you almost think he’s going to say something, but instead, he presses his lips to yours, capturing the nape of your neck with his hand so you can’t move away. 
His kiss is hungry, tongue gliding past your own and earning a mewl of pleasure- your hips rock slightly, and you’re immediately aggrieved to be reminded that he still has pants on.
“Want you naked,” you tell him between kisses, “want to taste you-”
Now it’s his turn to let out a groan of eager delight, and he lets go of his hold on your neck, pulling away from your lips to look you in the eyes while he grabs a fistful of your hair, tugging ever so slightly to have your head arching back- “You sure about that?”
“God, yes-” you moan, licking your lips-
“Then go ahead, angel,” Seungcheol says, releasing you. “Do whatever your heart desires, and if you get tired, let daddy know so he can take over again.”
You’ve never been wetter in your life. Nor have you ever shimmied down a man’s body and wrestled with his pants so quick, but with Seungcheol, that’s precisely what you do, and within no time at all, you have your mouth wrapped around the head of his cock.
He’s girthy- and you can just imagine how good the stretch of him is going to feel- 
You’re practically drooling on him, bobbing your head up and down while he pushes your hair out of your face, releasing a groan and a “that’s it, angel” that eggs you on even more.
You’re aware that you don’t want to make him cum like this- this is just you returning the favour before riding him- 
God, you want to ride him so bad- like you’ve never wanted to ride any man in your whole entire life.
“Fuck-” 
It’s the first swearword you’ve ever heard come out of Seungcheol’s mouth, and it goes straight to your pussy, which clenches around nothing, your mouth slipping down far enough on his cock that you choke-
“Careful, darling,” the hand in your hair tugs you off his cock, and you take a gasp of air, sneaking a glance up at the man who has you going feral-
“I wanna ride you.”
“Like I said, do whatever your heart desires,” comes his almost casual response-
This man is going to be the death of you.
Death by psychologist cock.
Before you can even think a coherent sentence, you’re straddling Seungcheol’s hips, adjusting his cock to fit snuggly against your core, and sinking down on him, filling yourself inch by delicious inch until you’re sat atop him like a queen on her throne.
His hands find your waist, and you both release sounds of pleasure, your eyes closing to enjoy the feeling of being perfectly full for just a moment before you begin to move-
“Feels good, huh?” he prompts, squeezing your hips gently.
“Feels fucking fantastic,” you tell him- swear words be damned.
Your hands find his strong chest, and you lean over him, connecting your lips while you take a test thrust, bouncing just slightly on his cock-
The feeling is enough to have you both groaning into each other’s mouths, Seungcheol cupping the side of your face while he gently bites at your lower lip-
You’re not used to being on top- and it feels obvious in the shallow way you’re riding him, too distracted in kissing to give either motion your full attention-
But that doesn’t matter, because Seungcheol is rutting up to meet you, matching your slow pace and helping you find a steady rhythm with the hand still on your hip, guiding you as you begin to bounce.
It feels like heaven to be fucking Choi Seungcheol- feels like nothing you could have ever imagined. 
You find yourself getting lost in him, working on autopilot with one destination in mind: orgasmic pleasure, and with each thrust of his hips to meet you, he helps you get closer.
“Fuck, Cheol-” you groan, tearing your lips from his to take a breath, burying your face against his neck while your thighs burn from effort- “Daddy, please- please, fuck me-”
That’s all you need to say to get him to take over, flipping you onto your back so he can regain the top position. He captures your hands, raising them over your head where he can lock your wrists together in his strong grip, then his free digits slip between your bodies, seeking out your clit-
“Oh my god,” you moan, eyes closing as you’re overwhelmed in the sensation of him-
“Close already, sweetheart?” he questions, letting out a smug, sexy, little chuckle. “Feels that good?”
“Yes- feels so good,” you tell him, ready to say anything he wants you to if it means he fucks you harder-
His fingers draw small quick circles on your clit, and your legs twitch where they’re wrapped around his waist.
“I’ve hardly even fucked you- you can hold it a little longer, can’t you darling?” he prompts, nosing at your cheek. “For me?”
“I can-” you groan as he fucks you harder, “I can try- but- my clit-”
“Is this making it difficult for you?” Seungcheol smiles, relenting ever so slightly and then removing his hand all together in favour of wrapping it around your throat. “There, is that better?”
He squeezes your airway, and you’re simply unable to speak, unable to do anything but moan like a whore in heat while he fucks you closer and closer to an orgasm you’re desperately trying to hold off for him-
“You feel-” he lets out a groan, “unbelievable.”
No, he feels unbelievable, and you can’t even touch him with your hands still pinned- 
You think if you could graze your fingers across his strong shoulders you’d cum instantly, so maybe it’s a good thing he has your wrists in his grasp-
“I think I want you to cum now,” he decides, and you’re thankful- only for him to release your throat and rub your clit, which has you whining loudly all over again- “You’ll cum with me, right?”
“God, daddy- yes!” you whimper- the coil in your stomach clenching as tightly as ever-
Then he releases your wrists, anchoring a hand against your abdomen to keep you down while he works you over the edge- and your own fingers immediately seek out the shoulders that have you dizzy with lust, core clamping down on his cock as you’re high hits you full force.
“Cheol-” you whimper, delighted by the way he immediately presses his lips to yours, eagerly eating up your sounds of pleasure and returning them with grunts and groans of his own while fucking you through one of the best orgasms of your entire life.
His tongue dances by yours, teeth teasing past your lip-
Your fingers are in his hair and you can feel him practically everywhere, your entire body alight with wonderful sensations of bliss-
It starts to slow too soon, but every up must have a down, and as his hips lose pace and your sounds lessen, you realize you’re truly, madly, deeply in love with Choi Seungcheol.
And you’ve known him for less than a week.
Tumblr media
8: Wednesday
“Are you settling in okay?” Bora’s voice pulls you away from your daydreaming, and you tear your eyes off of Seungcheol to focus on the woman whose house you’ve been enjoying for much of the evening.
She’d been introduced to you as Seungcheol’s colleague’s wife, and you’ve yet to get any one on one with the very pregnant hostess, whose husband, Mingyu, has been circling her like a puppy this entire time. 
“Yes,” you respond, finding your voice, “you have a very easy home to settle into.”
“I appreciate that,” she smiles, taking the free seat on the sofa next to you, one hand settling over her protruding stomach in a maternal way that makes your heart soften. “I’ve been meaning to have a chat with you since you arrived, but both of us seem to have a plus one that’s attached at the hip.”
Now it’s her turn to look over at Seungcheol and Mingyu, who are huddled around another psychologist friend of theirs, Wonwoo, and his wife, their attention fixed on the youngest member of the housewarming party, a six-month-old baby named Yumi.
“I feel as if I’m the plus one,” you say.
“Don’t be modest,” Bora brushes it off with a smile, “Cheol has had his hand on the small of your back for most of the evening. As much as they like to pretend they’re big shot psychologists, we’re the crutches that get them through the evening.”
You take a moment to consider her words. 
This is the first event you’ve gone to with your new beau, and for much of it, you’ve been as intent to stick to Cheol’s side as he has been to yours.
“Trust me,” Bora continues, “give it a few minutes and they’ll migrate over here to be close to us.” She pauses, then, “Mingyu has to get used to being in the living room, a pregnant woman like me needs a good, comfortable seat.”
You both laugh at the way she touches her belly again, pushing it out and relaxing back on the sofa. 
“How far along are you?” you ask. 
Despite already having had dinner and discussion for an hour or two, much of the focus has been on the home and various publications that the four university friends have been working on, with Wonwoo’s wife Minji having arrived with Yumi only a short while ago. 
“Eight months,” Bora sighs, continuing to stroke her baby bump. “I’m just about ready to pop. But enough about me and my belly, you’ve hardly spoken about yourself- and Cheol is always so focused on work, I’ve yet to get many details out of him, other than the fact that you’re worth skipping book club for. Did you two have a hot date last night?”
Your skin heats with embarrassment- “I didn’t know he’d skipped book club for me-”
“It’s a loose arrangement, Tuesdays at seven, I’m only teasing you,” Bora leans over to nudge you with her shoulder, offering you a sweet smile. “How did you two meet?”
The nondisclosure agreement pops into your mind like a red warning sign. 
“Erm…” you swallow, “Cheol hasn’t told you?”
“Like I said, he’s very tight-lipped about it,” Bora explains. “But- I’ve never known Seungcheol to be a fan of changing his schedule- and the pearl necklace you’re wearing- the dress, your lovely nails- they all seem like gifts to me. Am I right?”
Her husband might be a psychologist, but Bora has just as much of a critical eye. She sees right through you.
“Fine, don’t tell me,” Bora waves your silence off, “I know I’m right. I’ll figure you two out.”
“Are you being nosy again, Mrs. Kim?” Vernon, the fourth and quietest man of your new lover’s friend group joins you in the living room, taking a seat on the single chair to your left.
“Always,” Bora responds with a smile. “Wait, Vernon, maybe you know more about this. Y/N is being no fun- Cheol must have told you where and when they met-”
Vernon’s mouth opens in something like recognition-
“Ah ha!” Bora exclaims, leaning closer to you, sandwiching you in while she presses for more information. “So you do know!” 
“I do, but-” Vernon looks at you, then he leans in too, his voice dipping to something near a whisper, “Are we allowed to talk about this?”
“Allowed?” Now Bora is even more hooked on finding the truth than before, and her gaze darts between you and the man on your left, who obviously knows at least a few details about you and Seungcheol’s ‘origin story.’
Due to the NDA, all you can do is sit there like a fish out of water, and you find yourself looking to Seungcheol, hoping he’ll see you in distress and come over to sort things out-
“Let’s just say-” Vernon sighs, giving in to the pregnant woman’s need for information, “Y/N, you seem like a great girl- as kind, calm, collected, and smart as Seungcheol told us you were- but, I am shocked he found you on a dating site.”
“A dating site?” Bora’s eyes have widened, and she shuffles closer to you on the couch, jaw dropped. “Stop- when I told him to try online dating after his last girlfriend I was honestly joking- everyone knows Tinder is hookup central these days.”
Bora is as inquisitive as anyone you’ve ever met, and she checks you and Vernon for your reactions, easily picking up on the shift of energy-
“Wait, not tinder?” She pauses, waiting for an answer. When it becomes obvious neither you nor Vernon are going to elaborate, she sighs and sits back a little. “Now that I think of it, tinder is an app, not a site- the only dating sites I can think of online are-”
It’s like a lightbulb goes off atop her head, and her jaw drops a little more- then she’s inching in close to you again, whispering as Vernon had done earlier, “You know what? Now that we’re discussing it- a sugar daddy site would be perfect for Cheol.”
Vernon groans, throwing his hand over his eyes and leaning forward. It’s clear he’d expected to be able to talk to you in something of vague code without Bora picking up on it- but it seems he’s underestimated the astute woman next to you. 
“You guys are horrible at keeping secrets,” Bora grins, sneaking a glance at Seungcheol, who’s now picked up baby Yumi- “This is so interesting.” 
“The plot thickens,” you offer, unable to say much more than that.
“Oh my god, stop,” Bora says playfully, poking your arm. “Obviously there’s some… agreement that’s been made between you and Cheol, so I’ll try not to prod you for much more information,” she promises, “but I’ll talk to Cheol and the next time we meet, you’ll be able to speak more freely.”
“The next time we meet?” you ask, wondering how the woman can be so sure of herself in every regard.
“We’ll meet again,” she tells you. “Trust me, anyone watching you and Seungcheol- well, anyone who knows him, can tell he really likes you.”
Your heart skips a beat. “You think?” 
Bora smiles at you. “Sweet girl, it’s obvious. Trust me, Seungcheol doesn’t bring around just anyone to parties with us, and like I said, he doesn’t often change his schedule for girls either. I don’t care what site you met on, you have that man whipped.”
“Bora-” the psychologist on your left groans.
“Vernon,” she retorts with the same tone. 
They exchange a glance, a battle for dominance, and Bora wins, Vernon releasing a sigh before leaning back in his chair.
“You know what is surprising?” he asks.
“Tell us,” Bora mirrors him, relaxing back against the couch.
“How good Cheol is being with Yumi tonight.” Vernon is watching his friends and the baby again, and soon all three of you are.
“That’s a good point, Vernon,” Bora grins, nudging you a little with her elbow. “I wonder why that is?”
You think her intuition has finally run dry. She can’t be insinuating that you’re partially the reason behind Seungcheol’s apparent baby fever- 
And if she is, she has another shock coming for her when she finally talks to Cheol and finds out that ‘no babies’ was one of the clauses of your dating agreement.
“I think, Cheol’s the kind of man who likes seeing people happy, and Yumi is very expressive” you offer. “People can like babies without wanting one for themselves.”
Bora lets out a scoff. “Right, Mingyu and I always thought we just ‘liked babies,’ and now look at me. Liking babies is always how it starts, and before you know it, nine months have gone by, you’ve turned into a balloon and are buying a new home big enough to raise a family in.”
You are envious of her position, but at the same time, you’re acutely aware that you and Cheol are extremely new to each other. He’s not the kind of man to be hasty- or at least, you’d thought he wasn’t, but as Bora had mentioned, Seungcheol doesn’t introduce just anyone to his friends. 
You’ll have to talk with him about this and you know it, but until then, it’s enough to just sit between his friends and watch him play with Yumi, who seems to give everyone in the vicinity a serious case of baby fever. 
Tumblr media
9: Thursday
“Hold up-” Seungkwan says, interrupting you with a wave of his hands, and they land on your knees, “wait a minute- so he makes you sign an NDA, and then invites you out with his friends, and one of them like- bombards you for an hour about him-”
“It wasn’t an hour-”
“Sure-”
“And she wasn’t bombarding,” you correct.
“Ok, fine, yeah, whatever- but then-” Seungkwan takes a deep breath, “he also has a thing about no babies, and in the first week- straight up rubs a baby in your face for an entire night-”
“Yumi was only there for an hour or so before we left-”
“And then!” your best friend interrupts you again, “on the car ride home, instead of discussing it with him like adults- ya’ll put up the separation between you and his hot as fuck driver, and nearly fucked in the back seat-”
“Oh my god, stop-” you groan, “I told you, it was just kissing-”
“With you straddling the man!” Seunkwan yells back. “And all of this, after he switched his schedule to fuck you on Tuesday night- even though you said it would go slow-”
“Actually, he told me he wouldn’t fuck me till the third date, and if we didn’t meet Tuesday, the night with his friends on Wednesday would have been the third date, so-” 
“I swear to fucking god, I have whiplash,” Seungkwan tells you, looking as serious as ever. “Ya’ll make me sick! Sick I say! What in the ever-loving fanfic is this bullshit-”
“Have you been writing more Hannibal and Will love stories again?”
“Maybe.” 
“Are you going to write a fanfic about Will and Hannibal based on me and Cheol?”
“Maybe…” 
“Seungkwan!” 
“Well don’t tell me juicy stories if you don’t want them getting thrown in a sex fantasy! Ya’ll nearly fucked in the back of a car with a hot chauffeur-” 
“I told you-” you begin to defend yourself again, only to be cut off by your phone buzzing.
Both you and Seungkwan look to your cell, placed a foot or two away on the coffee table.
“Daddy,” you both say in unison, and then you’re lurching for your phone.
“Seungkwan stop!” you screech, grabbing onto his sweater when he latches onto the device first.
“Put him on speaker!” Seungkwan declares, holding your cell just out of your reach while it rings.
“Yeah- I’ll put him on speaker-” you fold easily, “just give me the phone!”
Instead of handing it to you right away, your best friend answers the call and hits speaker, then thrusts it towards your face.
“Hi, daddy!” you blurt out, flustered from the small dust up you’d just had with your friend over the entire situation.
There’s a chuckle on the other end of the line, then “Hi, sweetheart. It sounds like I’ve interrupted something.”
“Just-” you grab the cell back from Seungkwan, “just had trouble finding my phone is all, was worried you’d be sent to voicemail.”
“I’m glad I wasn’t. It’s good to hear your voice.”
Your heart swoons, and Seungkwan grabs a pillow to scream into. “Good to hear yours too.”
“I’m just calling to see if we’re still on for tomorrow.”
“Right, yeah- do you still want to see me? I know you were very specific when we met about meeting up once or twice a week, and I’ve already seen you twice in the past three days-”
“Once or twice a week, plus the occasional group event,” Seungcheol clarifies for you. “I’d really enjoy having you over tomorrow, if you haven’t already made plans. I won’t hold it against you if you have, I can see how there might have been a small miscommunication- especially after my… erratic behavour this week, fitting you in on Tuesday- scheduling will almost always be smoother than it has been these last few days.”
“I’d love to see you tomorrow- I haven’t made any other plans.”
“Good.” You can hear him smiling. “Since it’s a Friday, and I don’t have any specific work engagements on weekends, how do you feel about bringing an overnight bag?”
Seungkwan drops his pillow.
“I would love that, too-” you say.
“Perfect. Should we say pick up at seven?”
“Sounds great.” 
God, he makes everything so easy-
“Can’t wait to see you again, angel. Have a good evening, you deserve it.”
You deserved to get dicked down.
“Have a good night too, Cheol.” 
Tumblr media
10: Friday
When you exit your building, you’re shocked to find a different car - and an entirely different driver - waiting to take you to  Seungcheol’s home.
The man himself is standing aside a sleek, black, two-seater sports car, dressed in his usual suit aesthetic that shows off the broadness of his shoulders- 
You go feral nearly immediately, and it takes everything in you to stop from practically drooling as you close the distance between you and the man who pulls you into a hug that takes you off your feet for a greeting.
“Hey there, angel,” his breath tickles your hair and he sets you back down. He takes your hands gently, holding them out to the sides so he can get a good look at your outfit, a red dress you’d chosen, knowing it’s his favourite colour. “You look gorgeous.”
“You’re not so bad yourself,” you grin, playing with his fingers.
One quick motion has him spinning you like a dancer, and you find yourself giggling like a schoolgirl.
“Ready to go?” he asks when you’ve come to a stop in front of him again.
“Uh huh,” you nod, giving your head a little shake to pull yourself from a lust-fueled daze, “sorry, I was just- I wasn’t expecting you to be the one picking me up.”
“I gave Seokmin the night off,” Seungcheol tells you, opening the car’s passenger side door and holding out a hand to help you in. “Hope that’s okay,” he leans down and presses a quick kiss to your cheek before taking your overnight bag and closing you into the vehicle.
He puts your bag in the back trunk, then slips into the driver’s seat.
Seungcheol’s hand finds your thigh, and he squeezes gently, offering you a small smile. “I know we’re planning on having you stay the night, but if you decide you don’t want to sleep over, I can always drive you home later.”
“Cheol,” you rest your hand on top of his, “I think we both know I’m not going to take you up on that offer.”
“Sure, but I figured I’d put it on the table regardless.” 
You smile, leaning in to steal a kiss to his cheek, as he had when he helped you into your seat. “You’re too sweet to me.”
“You deserve it,” he insists, giving your thigh another squeeze before reaching for the ignition. 
The car revs to life. 
It’s hard not to stare at Seungcheol while he drives, and luckily, his hand returns to your thigh, giving you something to focus on. You take to playing with his fingers, marveling at how handsome every inch of him is.
“Vernon called me yesterday,” Seungcheol says, dragging your attention from his hands.
“Oh?”
“He admitted to slipping up and giving Bora ideas.” Seungcheol lets out a small chuckle, “said you looked like a deer in headlights when he arrived to the conversation- she was pressing you for details, huh?”
“Not in a bad way,” you tell him, wanting to defend the woman who you’re already coming to think of as a friend. “She was just- curious.”
“It’s my fault for not being specific with you about the NDA, or with Vernon for that matter- the NDA is primarily for when we go to work events outside of our inner circle, which is why your best friend is mentioned on the form you signed- it seems both Vernon and Mingyu were under the idea that I wanted to be highly secretive about us- but I’ve explained to them the nuances of it all. The next time you see Bora, please, feel free to discuss it with her, or Vernon, or Mingyu, Wonwoo, Minji- as long as you’re not too specific with Yumi, you can consider the baby a confidant as well.”
He’s obviously joking about the baby, but the mention of the child brings those same warm fuzzy conflicted feelings that you’d experienced last night at the get-together. 
There will be a time to talk with Seungcheol about his seemingly dualistic baby fever and baby aversion- but tonight is not the night for it.
You’re thankful he’d even brought up the topic of Bora and the NDA, and already, what little anxiety you’d felt about this whole thing has been substantially dwindled.
“I really liked your friends,” you admit, thinking back to how pleasant the evening had been. Despite Bora’s teasing and prying, she’d been nothing but a courteous host when Seungcheol and Mingyu had predictably rejoined you in the living room.
“They liked you too, angel. I knew they would.” He lets go of your thigh in favor of gently taking your hand. 
You can already feel your panties beginning to get wet- 
No man’s hands have ever had this effect on you before- and maybe it has to do, in part, with the whole ‘quirofilia’ thing-
Or maybe, Cheol is simply a man made by the hands of god himself- after all, how could he be this perfect without something like divine intervention?
Before you know it, you’re at Seungcheol’s house, and he’s pulling into the underground garage, where he parks next to the rolls-royce you’re accustomed to being driven in. 
Ever the gentleman, Seungcheol makes sure to come around and open your door for you, your duffle swung over his arm. He refuses to give it back to you, insisting on carrying it up to his home, where the two of you head to his bedroom instinctually.
He sets the bag down, turning to look at you, opening his mouth to say something-
But your patience has already run thin, and you all but launch yourself at the broad man, wrapping your arms around the back of his neck and pressing your lips to his while his hands find your waist.
He laughs into the kiss, and you think he must not have been expecting you to jump him like this. 
Doesn’t he know the effect he has on you?
“Cheol-” you groan, moving your lips to his neck-
“Eager, angel?” Seungcheol reaches down to cup your bum, prompting you to jump and wrap your legs around his waist. “It was hard being close but not able to properly touch you at the gettogether-” he says, taking a few steps back and collapsing down onto his bed, steadying you on top of him, “Could hardly even get work done today-”
“Was I that distracting for you, daddy?” you coo, teeth teasing past his earlobe.
He releases a groan, hands digging into your hips, forcing you down on his cock, which presses up against his dress pants, caught between your bodies. “Always.” 
“How can I fix it?” you wonder out loud, hands already going for the buttons of his shirt. “I wanna make you feel good.”
“You do, angel,” Seungcheol tells you, “make daddy feel so good.” 
“Wanna make you feel even better-” Then an idea comes to your head, “How about… a massage?” you suggest, thinking back to a paragraph you’d read from his book yesterday. “Aren’t you the one who claims relaxation time, such as stretching, massages, and the like, can be just as beneficial to the mind and body as activity itself?”
“Look at you, quoting my own work at me,” he releases a deep groan. “Are you sure that’s what you want to get up to tonight?”
“Just to start,” you tell him. “We have the whole evening- and tomorrow morning- why not start the night off with something like a massage? And work our way into…” you swivel your hips, “harder things.” 
“I like the sound of that, angel,” he confesses with another sigh of pleasure as you kiss the sweet spot just under his ear. “But you’ve got to let me get up so I can grab massage oil.”
You’d forgotten about that part, and the idea of letting Seungcheol leave you - even for a moment - brings out a bratty side of you that you’ve never truly experienced. 
It takes all your willpower to concede, getting off of the man who sits up and runs a hand through his hair. “You okay?” he questions, seeing the shift in your energy.
“Yeah,” you nod, “just hurry.”
He laughs, reaching out to gently pinch your chin between his thumb and forefinger. The kiss he places on your lips is as chaste as your first had been, and it leaves you tingling with potential, even as he stands and heads to the ensuite bathroom.
In his absence, you begin to take off your clothes, removing everything down to your bra and panties, and then, just for good measure, you settle onto your knees on the foot of his bed, trying to be as patient as possible.
You’re rewarded when Seungcheol appears in the doorway again, having stripped himself of his shirt. There’s a bottle of baby oil trapped between his teeth, and his hands are working on his belt and pants- 
When he sees you sitting on the foot of his bed, like the best girl there ever was, he lets the baby bottle drop from his mouth, catching it easily in one hand- “look at you,” he breathes, scanning your form. 
“Like what you see, daddy?” you tease, skin heating from the attention he gives you.
“Love it,” he tells you. “How good are your reflexes, darling?”
You open your mouth to respond, only to have him toss the bottle of oil at you. 
Unlike him, you don’t catch it gracefully, the bottle almost slipping out of your hands- there’s a small fumble but your digits wrap around it-
Seungcheol laughs at you. “With butter fingers like that- should I be getting us a towel to put down?” 
You hate that it’s a legitimate question.
And you doubly hate that the answer is a resounding yes, which you verbalize to him, annoyed that he’ll be leaving again-
But then you’re graced with a full view of his beautiful back when he turns to head into the bathroom again, and you decide to be a good, patient girl for just a few more moments.
Seungcheol returns, and you bite your tongue while you watch him set the towel down, but as soon as it’s settled, you find yourself saying - in something like a command - “on your stomach first,” you’re quick to adjust to your tone, “I wanna work your back out a little to start.”
“How could I say no to that?” Seungcheol grins, following through and laying flat on the towel.
You nearly drool while watching him adjust his arms, propping his head up with both hands under his chin. His biceps are bulging and your mouth is definitely beginning to water again, prompting you to lick your lips-
“Have you given many massages before?” he asks, as you straddle his hips, continuing to marvel at the shape of his perfect form-
“Erm- define many?” 
He chuckles, and you flip the cap of the baby oil, allowing the liquid to pour into your palm. “I’ll take that as a no.”
“It can’t be that hard,” you tell him, bringing your hands to the muscled back that has you wet like the ocean every time you see it.
“Tell that to my chiropractor,” he says, a joke that makes you both laugh.
You begin to work away at his muscles, both hands smoothing up and down his back, focusing in on the shoulders you love so much-
“Feels good,” Seungcheol groans, releasing a deep sigh of relief that has your ego shooting through the roof. 
“That’s good daddy,” you tell him, leaning over him and applying more of your body weight as pressure for your hands. “You deserve to relax.”
He chuckles slightly, and you realize you’re picking up on some of his diction. Hasn’t he been the one telling you what you deserve thus far? 
All it takes is you being on top and you begin to emulate his mannerisms, the soft dom tendency towards praise. 
You can tell he’s enjoying it, and you are too, your panties getting wetter with every second your hands are on his broad shoulders-
 “Can you flip now?” you prompt, knowing it hasn’t been that long that you’ve been working on his back- but you miss his face, and you’re eager to get your hands on his chest-
With a grunt of affirmation, Seungcheol begins to turn, and you lift yourself off of him enough to allow the movement. Once he’s on his back, you settle down again, capturing his cock between your bodies as it strains against his pants.
“You like this position, huh?” he asks, smiling up at you with an expression that exudes adoration. 
His hands find your thighs, rubbing up and down while you get more oil on your palms. “Not always,” you tell him, beginning to massage his chest, “top can be fun to start, in some cases, but- I really liked being under you the last time we were in your bed.”
“Oh yeah?” 
You avoid his gaze, knowing your skin is heating from what you’d just admitted. “Uh huh.”
“You’re cute,” he breathes, rubbing circles on your thighs, “getting all shy while sitting on top of me like this.”
“I’m trying to focus,” you tell him, trailing your fingers down to his abdomen. 
“You look a little dazed, darling,” he presses, “are you sure you don’t want me to take over?”
“I’ve hardly massaged you yet-” you go to argue, but Seungcheol is already making the move to sit up.
He grabs a fistful of your hair and tilts your head back the way he had last time- his breath is hot against your throat, and he trails his nose up under your jaw, bringing his lips to your ear. “What if I don’t care about the massage anymore?”
“Then-” you swallow thickly, pussy throbbing when his free hand unclasps your bra behind you, “then, okay.”
“Okay?” he chuckles. “My love, I don’t think ‘then, okay’ is a sentence.”
“Fuck me?”
“Not too sure that’s a sentence either, but, your wish is my command.”
It seems like the easiest thing in the world for him to discard your bra and flip you onto your back, lips finding your own, tearing your breath away.
Your legs tighten around his waist, and his oiled chest slides against yours, your newly freed nipples pebbling at the direct contact-
One of his hands, slides between your bodies, skimming over your breast and cupping it, squeezing. You release a moan of pleasure, hips bucking, pushing up towards him-
Your own hands slide over his slippery shoulders, and you mentally kick yourself for having lubed him up- there’s hardly anything to grasp onto, so you latch onto his hair instead, kissing him harder.
He releases your breast, hand slipping down and under the waistband of your panties. When his fingers find your core, they tease past your clit, and you can feel the silkiness of the baby oil on his digits, which glide into your wet hole as easily as ever. 
“Cheol-” you moan desperately, wanting to push your hips up- to get closer, but he holds you down with his large body, lips moving to your neck.
You realize, as his expert fingers crook up and find your gspot, that the last time you’d fucked, he’d never fingered you. You’d gotten to experience his tongue and his cock, but the middle and ring fingers that explore your pussy have something like trained exactitude, hitting the spot that has your toes curling with deadly precision. 
“Oh my god-” you whimper, wrapping your arms around the back of his neck, looking for an anchor while he begins to thrust his digits into you with enough force that your hips begin to rock-
The palm of his hand applies pressure to your clit, rubbing you through the rough manhandling that has you achingly close to an orgasm within no time-
“Gonna cum?” he prompts in your ear, hot breath making your skin tingle.
“Yes, daddy-” it’s the most you can do to hold onto him and clench your eyes shut, an intense feeling of euphoric pressure erupting between your legs-
“That’s it gorgeous, let it all out-” he groans, fingers unrelenting-
You can hear your pussy, squelching sinfully around his fingers- and you can feel wetness gushing between your thighs-
In the back of your mind, you realize you’re squirting, cumming completely undone on his hand, but you’re too lost in the feeling of it to care.
He finger fucks you to the point of overwhelm, until your whines and whimpers are hoarse and tears well in the corners of your shut eyes-
And then he’s pulling his hand out of your panties, and the soaked material is left to cling back to your sopping hole.
Your arms go slack, landing on the bed next to you, and Seungcheol pulls away from your body, making you moan desperately, eyes opening to watch him-
“I’m not going anywhere, angel,” he promises, pushing his own pants down before kicking them to the side, then he goes to tear your panties off, and you see, for the first time, how truly ruined they are. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen someone squirt this much,” he tells you, discarding the fabric so he can rejoin you on the bed, the both of you fully nude. “Did that feel good?”
“So good-” you whimper, hardly able to form sentences in your delirious, sex induced brain fog-
Seungcheol slots himself between your thighs again, cupping the side of your face, thumb brushing away the tear that’s escaped your eye. “Do you need a moment?”
“No!” you’re quick to protest, locking your legs around his hips. “Fuck me- daddy- please-”
You don’t think any cock has ever entered you as smoothly as his does, aided by the copious amount of wet arousal still dribbling out of your hole.
Seungcheol tucks his face against the crook of your neck, supporting himself above you with two hands buried into the pillow on either side of your head. His lips are feverish against your throat, and the groans he releases as he begins to fuck you make you as horny as ever.
“You feel so fucking good,” he moans, rutting into you with a pace and power that increases with every slap of skin on skin- “so perfect for me-”
“Daddy-” you whine, clawing at his back while he ravages your insides.
“So responsive-” his teeth graze past your neck and you shiver, whole body tingling with delight.
“Harder-” you moan.
“Harder?” he releases something like a laugh, and then you hear him swallow, adjusting his position so he can dig his elbows into the bed, hooking his forearms under your own shoulders, which props you up ever so slightly- enough to change the angle and allow him to follow through with your request.
You release a squeak at the feeling of being completely at his mercy, completely wrapped in Cheol while he’s wrapped in you- the perfect combination really.
The sounds escaping you aren’t something you can hold back, and each rough thrust has his cock hitting a spot deep inside of you, a spot that has you becoming a mewling, moaning, whimpering mess for him.
“Just like that-” you tell him desperately, grabbing at his hair, eager to hold onto something while you get fucked into oblivion-
“You close, gorgeous?” he asks, and all you can do is moan, which makes him chuckle, “yeah you are,” he breathes. “Squeezing daddy so fucking tight- you were made for this, weren’t you, angel?”
“Yes-” 
“Made to be fucked-” he growls, rutting into you even harder-
You’re not sure where sweet, soft dom Seungcheol has gone, but you’re more than happy to be decimated by the man fucking into you like an animal, and his sinful praisings go straight to your pussy, which clenches around him even more.
“That’s it angel, that’s it-” he groans, “just a little more-” one of his hands moves to grab your thigh, hiking it higher on his waist-
He hits a spot that has you seeing stars, and you gasp loudly, crying out-
“Cum for me,” he instructs, and before your mind has even registered his words, your pussy is following through with the command, clamping down onto him while the biggest orgasm of your life slams into you like a freight train. 
Seungcheol lets out delicious sounds of pleasure, gasping against your throat, fucking you through your orgasm while coating your insides with his own release-
You’re completely surrounded by him.
There’s nothing else, only you and Cheol… and perhaps the ruined towel below you, dragging against your back with each rough thrust.
His motions begin to slow, and he comes to a stop, collapsing some of his body weight down against you while you both struggle to catch your breath. 
Neither of you say anything, too lost in the aftershocks of pleasure.
But with Cheol, you don’t need to say anything. You’re completely safe with him, completely content to rest in his arms, knowing there’s not a single place in the world you’d rather be.
Tumblr media
11: Saturday
Waking up in Seungcheol’s bed, you immediately stretch in search of him- only to find the bed empty.
Sitting up, and wrapping the quilt around your nude body, you look around, blinking away residual grogginess. 
The man who’d fucked you silly until the late hours of the morning is nowhere to be seen, and you can’t help the way annoyance floods through you. But you remind yourself that Seungcheol likes his schedules, and a quick check of the clock next to the bed shows you that it’s eleven am, so you suppose you can’t be mad at Cheol for not staying with you while you slept half the day away.
Getting out of bed, you’re surprised to find just how sore your body is. 
Your thighs burn- and you suppose a round number five riding session may have not been the best idea last night.
You find the simple black sleeping shirt Seungcheol had given you before deciding to tear it off of you for round six, and you enjoy the way it dwarfs you. 
Sometimes you still can’t believe how big and broad Cheol is- 
Finding your overnight bag, you take out a fresh pair of panties, and decide to head off in search of Seungcheol in the simple shirt and underwear look. It’s doubtful you’ll be wearing it for much longer regardless.
It’s not hard to find your psychologist lover, after all, you simply have to follow the smell of food to the kitchen. 
Your sugar daddy is standing at the stove, one hand holding a spatula while he cooks eggs, the other propping up a book that he’s quietly reading.
He’s so sexy and smart- and sexy… and smart.
You can’t help but tiptoe towards him, latching onto his back and pressing your cheek against the space between his shoulder blades, releasing a groan of pleasure to finally be connected to him again.
“Morning, angel,” Seungcheol greets you, setting his book down before adjusting you, tugging you so you’re in front of him and he can meet your eyes. “Did you sleep well?”
“Better than ever,” you beam at him, leaning up to press a chaste kiss to his lips. “And you?”
“Never better,” he returns your smile, and your heart practically melts. “Hungry?”
“Definitely- are you my master chef today?”
He laughs. “I’m not sure I’m that good, cooking is a hobby I’ve only truly picked up in recent years.”
“Right,” you say, turning in his arms to look down at the pan in front of you. “Very hard ingredient, eggs.”
Seungcheol releases a cross between a chuckle and a sigh behind you, poking at your ribcage. “I can make more than eggs. I just figured, I don’t really know what you like when it comes to food, so I’d make something safe and healthy. Besides, I wasn’t sure when you’d wake up.”
“So this is just for you, is that what you’re saying?” you tease him some more, enjoying the domesticity of this- it’s as if you’ve done this a hundred times before, or at least, you have the peace that comes with familiarity.
“If I had known you were such a brat-” he begins, but you cut him off with a squeal and turn to face him again, insisting “I’m not a brat!”
He simply looks at you with a smile.
“You’re being mean to me,” you pout, cupping the back of his neck and getting closer to him. 
Seungcheol scoffs, shaking his head slightly. He’s quick to change the subject. “Eggs are done, are you going to come sit with me at the table?”
With a sigh, you release the psychologist, allowing him to move the eggs to a plate- and when you turn to head to the table, you see a tray of fresh fruit and other breakfast items.
“There’s orange juice in the fridge, water, or I can make you some coffee,” Seungcheol says, following you to the table where you both take your seats. 
“I’m okay for now,” you tell him, grabbing a particularly tasty-looking piece of fruit to gnaw on. “Thanks, daddy.”
Seungcheol smiles, looking down at the healthy fruit options. “You know,” he says, moving a few pieces of cantaloupe and honeydew to his plate, “I’ve been wondering about you and your daddy kink.”
“Hmm?” 
“Just that- we’ve never discussed it, not explicitly- I guess, being a sugar daddy, the term is in the name, but… you took to it very easily,” he explains.
“Are you suggesting I have inherent daddy issues?”
“Not suggesting, merely… wondering.”
“How about this,” you set your fruit down, “I’ll talk about my daddy issues when you tell me why you think you’d be a bad father.”
Seungcheol looks at you quizzically. 
“I know you say it’s about your work and not having enough time, but- you’re settled in your career and reputation. You have this big house, a chauffeur, a group of smart psychologist friends who are popping out babies right now- and I saw the way you were with baby Yumi. looking at all of that- the only reason I can think of for why you’d be… adverse to babies, is that you have some personal reasons to think you’d be bad at it.” 
The man across from you stays quiet, leaning back in his chair, but a smile works its way across his face. Then, he sighs, “touche.” 
“So I guess neither of us will be talking about our daddy issues at the breakfast table,” you conclude, picking at your fruit again.
“How did I ever find a girl like you on a dating site?” Seungcheol says. “So pretty, and smart-”
“How did I ever find you on a dating site?” you retort, “so sexy, and smart-”
“Maybe finding each other was destiny.”
“Do you believe in that sort of thing?” you ask, cocking your head to the side. “Many men of science that I’ve heard of tend to lean towards atheism.”
“Maybe I used to, but then- let’s just say, I found an angel, and my world’s been flipped upside down ever since.” 
Your heart leaps in your chest, and you avert your gaze, looking down at your fruit. “You’re too sweet to me.”
“As I’ve told you before, angel,” Seungcheol reaches his hand across the table, placing it over your own, “you deserve it.”
Tumblr media
☀️ mlist + an. thank you for reading! this fic was never supposed to be this long- i don't know what came over me- it was very self-indulgent :) hope you liked it!
🍭 support me by. sending a tip here or here - or become a patron to access monthly bonus content and extensions for fics like this one :) find the Patreon teaser below! 
🔮 preview. You can’t believe how easy it is for Seungcheol to get you quaking for him- but you suppose, in some sense, you’re always quaking for your sugar daddy, who’d turned the entire trajectory of your life around the moment you’d met.
cw/ tw. oral (f receiving), fingering, unprotected sex, daddy/breeding kink, bickering like an old married couple, praise, semi-bondage, size kink, dirty talk, multiple orgasms, etc...
👹 rating. 18+ explicit I wc. 2.3k I teaser wc. 370
🌙 staring. seungcheol x afab!Reader  
Tumblr media
bonus teaser
“Are you checking your book sales again?” you groan, leaning over the back of the sunlounger chair to look over Seungcheol’s shoulders, your hands smoothing down his bare chest-
“No,” your psychologist lover says, closing his laptop and setting it on the side table next to him. 
“Liar,” you grin, moving around the front of his chair so he can see you and the red bikini adorning your body- one of many sets you’ve accumulated over the two and a half years you’ve been dating Seungcheol. 
You have no actual intent of going into the private pool behind you.
Seungcheol’s eyes eat you up, and the smile of appreciation that works its way onto his lips is as bright and full of affection as it’s always been. “Look at you, angel. I’ll never get tired of seeing you in red.”
“Ass kisser,” you tease, watching him stand up from the poolside chair. “I thought we agreed no work on our honeymoon.”
“It’s true that I promised that- but… checking sales on my new book isn’t work, it’s… checking sales on my new book, and besides, you were asleep,” your husband grins, hands finding your waist and tugging you to his chest. “What if you pretend you never saw me on my laptop.”
You roll your eyes. He’s gotten cheekier the longer you’ve been together, and this playful side of your relationship isn’t something you’d trade for the entire world. 
“You always get up to naughty things while I’m sleeping,” you tease, playing the part of an upset wife.
“Come on,” Seungcheol prompts, leaning down to kiss you, “say you love me.”
“I’ll say I love you when you fulfill your other promise.”
“You know, we’re what, three days into this vacation?” Seungcheol pulls you closer. “Who’s to say I haven’t already pumped a baby into you?”
“Me,” you grin, hooking your fingers in his swim trunks. “I don’t feel full at all right now, in any way, shape, or form.”
“Well then, let’s see what I can do about filling you up sufficiently,” he smiles, leaning down to kiss you one last time before throwing you over his shoulder and taking you back into your private vacation villa..
God, you fucking love this man.
Tumblr media
☀️to read the full bonus, subscribe to my Patreon - then - click here
👹 or check out what else is on my patreon here
🔮if nothing strikes your fancy, check out my m.list
Tumblr media
© smileysuh — all rights reserved. reposting/modifying of any fic, reaction, or piece of original writing posted on this blog is not allowed. Translations not allowed
Tumblr media
general taglist: (send me an ask to join either tag list:)
@gotshinct - @subhyuck - @fraechan - @learnthisfeeling
@runahways - @d-abin - @milkteade - @woogyuhae 
@anothershorthuman - @nihxxy - @vantxx95 - @bangshii
@poutypoutybin - @notbeforelong - @creepybakeoven
@ninetechculture - @yungiland - @suhsfam - @binchangf
@chogiwapadada - @librarian-stacks - @meowniee
@learnthisfeeling - @gigilame - @cumtrov3rsy
@mocha000 - @darthlunaa
svt taglist:
@romromthedeer - @strawbwebbie - @rebeccasficrecs
@alltowoo - @taestrwbrry - @13956789 - @greysdarling
@joonsneptune - @jedi-nightingale 
And thank you to everyone who interacted with the teaser :)
@just-here-to-read-01 - @shmooooo - @sysymei - @dejavernon
@woo8hao - @pussyfairytale - @minkwans - @millysfavfics
@yell0w-iris - @hoshi-mochi - @twenty1stcenturygirl -
@joonsytip - @zenitsuns - @loveandlettre
Tumblr has tag limits these days, so i'll be tagging others who interacted with the teaser in reblogs :)
7K notes · View notes
bibluebutterfly · 11 months ago
Text
Okay so I’m taking a risk here by talking about StaticMoth (as some fans will come at your throat if it’s mentioned), but let’s do it since I discovered something interesting.
The main thing being, I noticed that throughout these last few months, there has been a steady rise in StaticMoth fanart (which would make sense as StaticMoth has gotten a lot more shippers since the Instas were confirmed as noncanon), with Viv herself liking the more comedic/wholesome pieces.
Then upon closer inspection (aka, seeing one specific artist pop up constantly and finally deciding to check her profile), I realized that the Animation Director for Hazbin and Helluva has a LOT of their own StaticMoth fanart, with Viv even sometimes commenting on it.
So I’m now beginning to suspect that StaticMoth will NOT be as abusive as we were initially led to believe.
Check it out
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
(Smiles is the animation director for Hazbin and Joel is Val’s VA, just to be clear) that, and if you check this account you’ll see that they are all a BIG VoxVal fans, and Smiles also mentions how she worked with them a LOT in the show.
Tumblr media
Now call me crazy, but I don’t think this woman, or any of them would ship StaticMoth as hard as they do if one was abusive and the other wanted to get away from them. And since the art that Viv likes is actually really sweet at times, I think that StaticMoth will actually be a functional couple.
I mean they also get a playmat and the only couples who get playmats are the canon functional/going to be functional couples (ie. Chaggie, Stolitz, M&M, and Fizzarozzie)
Tumblr media
Also while I’m at it I may as well mention that they WERE included in her Valentines post. And in that gif, we have Vox is smiling evily at Val while he isn’t looking. That doesn’t really scream “abuse!!” to me.
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Ironically, the last time I saw behavior like this from the team (Viv liking fan art, animators and storyboard artists making their own cute fan art, playmats before canon, etc), it was about Fizzarozzie, and they turned out to be the healthiest couple on the show.
Coincidence? I think not. (Art below is done by Hunter B, a storyboard revisionist and Vivziepop herself)
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Now don’t get me wrong, I DONT think that they will be in any way healthy, but I don’t think it will be abusive. Or if it turns out Val does hit Vox to the point of breaking his screen, I think Vox will in return rip his arm out. If they’re abusive, it will be on both ends.
And since Vox has been appearing more in trailers and promos than Val, I think he will be the bigger, more prominent character. And it has been confirmed by many that Vox will very much be as bad as Val. He’s the most powerful the the Vees, and is clearly the head of the group. At the very least, I highly, HIGHLY doubt he will be the uwu babygirl that some fans think.
Tumblr media Tumblr media
I think StaticMoth will have a “evil couple” vibe where they probably aren’t head over heels, (their one true loves will almost definitely be money and themselves), but they have a blast bringing other people down together. They will be equally awful, we’ll hate them, but we will LOVE to hate them.
Or I’m dead wrong, and this post will age like milk.
804 notes · View notes
celestialtarot11 · 2 months ago
Text
Astro observations 🤍🐚
back with another astro post part 1000 (i dont remember how much its been) 😭 anyways yall, please enjoy and feel free to share your thoughts always! I had to go in deep with this one 👀 you know, its astrology
divider creds: @fairytopea
Tumblr media
Venus conj. Saturn has been the biggest lesson for me in love. In the connection often with this placement, the venus person clings to affection and love in a codependent way. The saturn person may withdraw & avoid romance altogether, creating an unstable dynamic. Venus person eventually learns their self worth is much more than having to convince someone why they should stay with them :/
That being said so much has been learned from this synastry. I truly became a better person and decided who was right for me, and who wasn’t. It broke my heart but fixed my vision! 
Tumblr media
Someone I know has someone else’s mars in her 12h. This manifested as instant attraction even though she was repulsed by him. She couldn’t explain why she felt this way. Its possible mars 12h can bring out what we feel interest in, despite our shame and guilt towards it. It often has to do with our trauma and being drawn to things we know initially aren’t good for us. Which begs the question: why? And thats where the healing begins.
To also add she had her Lilith conj his sun, which definitely brought out an impulse to explore what she thought was off putting. Lilith can make us go deep into our trauma and transform our beliefs from then to now. With the sun it makes sense her beliefs are shifting especially in relationships. Her source of power was repressed due to her trauma, but now this synastry could be a way to regain it.
Tumblr media
So random but are Taurus/Libra males more likely to be uncircumcised 😭 #sorry just had to put the thought out there
Jupiter in virgo male can be great listeners and conversationalists. It can also make them cunning, sly and manipulative with their word. With what kind of information they choose to let out at the time.
Tumblr media
Chiron in the 4h and not living with stable parents 🤝 trauma. This guy I know has this placement and does not live with his parents, he lives with his grandparents due to the instability in his home life. His mother currently has a boyfriend. Chiron in the 4h can make an individual experience lack of stable family connections at a young age. It can also represent a separation or divorce in the family, or even the native being kicked out or homeless at some point in their lives.
Mercury in Aries and either going from being super blunt and dry, to spilling everything on their mind no shame. A guy with this placement was very dry, enunciating every word he could to be “masculine.” This was his attempt at projecting a dominant figure, as he lacked for it physically (#this is an astro post sorry i gotta get in there) I feel like mercury in Aries could manifest as sounding boastful, arrogant and pretentious. Especially if they don’t have a high self esteem. But the other side of it: mercury in aries can spill everything personal of themselves lacking boundaries.
Tumblr media
Gemini Lilith natives know exactly what to say and how to say it. They are efficient with their word and thoughts. Precise and intelligent. Once empowered they acknowledge the importance of words and communication, but if not they can manipulate, lie to their benefit, and distort information to hide the truth. Empowered Lilith knows to honor all perspectives and feelings.
Also gemini lilith is multifaceted. Bring up a topic and gemini lilith can easily talk about it, even if you didn’t expect to know of it. They are tenacious individuals who love to learn more, and question everything presented to them!
Tumblr media
Depending on other aspects and placements but women with Capricorn placements and plutonian aspects in their chart are more likely to have a grunge, dark moody vibe to their outfits. Even their vibe is unmatched. There’s a woodsy, whimsical yet dark vibe to them you can’t fully describe or place. Especially if they have venus touching pluto those women tend to go for a moody, gloomy yet striking appearance! They may also prefer whimsical softer styles, and one day switch to a darker vibe to change things up. Venus=fashion. As a result of pluto cap women may go through many different styles and changes in order to find what suits them. And even then, cap women love to explore with their look! They shed their old skin to make room for more.
Taurus Venus men & Libra men I notice tend to be extreme in their looks. Some prefer their real body, not altered by surgery. This can go extreme in one way: do everything naturally to their body but expect crazy results. High expectations. And some of them prefer perfection as well and go for surgery. They want to be symmetrical, flawless, and yet convey this, “effortless,” look. Not overdone but just right. And it can manifest into something unhealthy by wanting to look perfect all of the time. Taurus/libra men can be hard on themselves physically to fit a standard or stereotype.
Tumblr media
Meanwhile Capricorn men want to convey this minimalistic, daddy energy. 😭. Not sorry. Some of ya’ll actually dress like dads though. Capricorn men always try to look put together, simple, yet there’s a sense of luxury to them. Depending on their other aspects/placements to Venus, they can give off a warm vibe. For example someone who was my childhood bestie dresses like a dad but gives off dork energy, because he has Aquarius stellium and Sagittarius placements as well. So it really depends on the venus aspects!
Libra dominant men are the type to go from couch potato to hot millennial business dad for an event. The type to get you drooling. The type to catch you off guard when you least expect it. The type you’d probably roll your eyes at when they say they’ll actually dress up, and when they do you’re stuck for words.
Tumblr media
Capricorn women and their playlist 🤝 comfort. The only thing that truly understands them deeply. The only thing they find themselves getting lost in rather than getting lost in a person. Because losing themselves to a person is much more disgraceful to them, than getting lost in something they put together themselves.
“I’d rather lose myself in the hands of something I made, flesh and bone than to give you my dignity, my vulnerability, my guilt.” -me, a cap moon probably.
Tumblr media
Thanks so much y’all for reading! I really hope ya’ll enjoyed this. Please always share your feedback, I love to engage and hear it! You can also send asks my way if that works! 🤍 have a great one.
Extra
Paid readings 🤍
310 notes · View notes
i-cant-sing · 1 year ago
Text
Just thinking about Yandere Todoroki clan and reader's random moments.
Reader coming home after a particularly bad day, but poor girl cant even cry or complain without everyone immediately overreacting and pulling you out of school/college or even keeping you from going out at all. So now, reader has to either cry in self pity before she enters her home, wipe her tears and fix herself just enough to show that she hadnt just bawled her eyes out moments ago. That, or do the more risky thing and go home, go to your room and cry under the covers, but then theres always the chance of Rei or the others walking in on you any moment.
Also thinking about baby/toddler reader being sick, just a common cold or flu, nothing major. But with reader whining and being so young, the family's infantalisation goes through the roof and theyd treat you as if you were immunocompromised. I wont lie, but I think Rei is almost kinda... glad when you get sick? She enjoys you being dependant on her for the most things, even when you grow up and are able to handle a cold, she still deludes herself into thinking that you need mommy to come and help you.
I think the one person who is most affected by reader getting sick, no matter what age, is Enji. The man just cant help but view you as a fragile, starving Victorian child the moment you fall ill. In his eyes, even a harsh blow of air is too much for a fragile thing like you, let alone something as bad as the flu. He just- he's holding toddler reader in his arms, who snuggles into his warm body, your tiny nose pink and he cant get the image of you crying and vomiting and being oh so feverish- thats just way too much for your small body. Oh how he almost cried when he took you to the doctor for a shot and you clung to him, trying to bury yourself into him as you begged him to make you feel better, cried to him that you didnt want to get the "big scary needle!" He just had to hold you there in his firm grip as you writhed, had to look away when you looked at him and he saw the feeling of betrayal in your eyes, had to keep himself from not strangling the fucking doctor for not being careful, had to walk out of the clinic and hand you to Rei because he couldnt hear you cry anymore, had to have Rei console both you and Enji (assuring him that "no, Enji. Y/n doesnt resent you for making her get a shot.") and he couldnt even sleep a wink that night because he was standing by your bed, holding your tiny hand with his pinky as a tear finally slipped out of his eye.
ALSO thinking about adult reader going out of the house to meet up with friends, except shes meeting up with them at a club instead of at their house like she told Enji and Rei, and now shes standing outside, abandoned by said friends, and shes now running because a group of pervy men are chasing her and she doesnt know who to call, so she just speed dials Shotou, except someone just changed all your speed dials to one number, and you think youre doomed when Shotou doesnt say a word to you and just hangs up when within minutes, someone comes in front of you-
"Dabi?" He tells you to cover your ears and look away, and you know well by know what that means, so you obey, feeling a bit regretful as those men begin to scream in agony. You dont know how long its been until Dabi pulls your hands away and examines your wounds. He lets you crash into his chest as you sob, and this time, Dabi simply decides to take you home quietly without a lecture.
Hmmm, also thinking about Natsuo who is usually cool as a cucumber, the most normal being in the family, except for his very rare episodes of unbridled rage where he suddenly becomes the Hulk. Good thing for you is that this anger is never directed towards you, rather towards people who actively threaten your life (except Rei cause she gets to play "Im your mom who became mentally unstable because of your abusive dad") The only time NAtsuo is stern with you is when it comes to your health. He's just looking at you with those strict eyes when you refuse to take your multivitamins, or dont want to get a flu shot, or try to make up an excuse so that he cant check your vitals. And when he just grabs your wrist and pulls you to sit down so that he can do his checkup, its in those moments that you realise just how strong your brother is... and how easy it may be for him to overpower you and sedate you if he ever followed through Rei's threats.
Tumblr media
913 notes · View notes
b1asho · 3 months ago
Text
Tumblr media
Huzzahh, it's species number 3! (There's a total of 6, including humans. 7 if you count artificial intelligences, 8 if you count the uhh other intelligences).
An official up to date visual for everyone's favorite communist amphibians, the Kixeli, and some up-to-date info!! ->
Kixeli are a small sentient species hailing from a planet covered mostly in ocean. They are amphibious, and originally evolved to switch between swimming and climbing using their webbed hands and powerful arms.
Their skin is permeable, allowing them to extend their time underwater to hunt and gather as well as reproduce, but due to their larger body and brain size/oxygen needs this isn’t sustainable and they must return to the surface.
Alongside their frequent trips outside the water, they also have a mucus layer and several specialized glands (including in their face by their eyes) to help remove excess salt and change levels of urea in their body to help make sure they dont lose resources when in the ocean.
Kixeli are omnivorous, with a focus on fruits and sealife. many cultures have a preference against eating anything that lives above water, including birds and the like, because they see themselves as spiritual equals to those animals as fellow air breathers.
They are oviparous, and have a specific mating season.
Most Kixeli have multiple variable spawn partners and see it as strange to be nailed down to one. Anyone who participated lays their eggs in a communal tide pool carved out in their communities.
Hatchlings are entirely aquatic wirh gills until later months of age, where they will begin to poke their head above water for air and start interacting more with the adults around them, who feed them a nutritive crop milk as they have already absorbed most of their tail by now.
This period is also the beginning of their understanding of language.
Once they lose their tail and grow in their limbs, they are still mostly helpless until those fully develop and myst cling to a caretaker adult in the community (blood parents don’t necessarily always raise their own children, but as someone who laid eggs they are responsible for children as a caretaker so anyone who didn’t want eggs gets left alone).
During their puberty, they will develop adult skin markings, and some can even end up changing sexes (much for the same reason some of them grow gliding membranes, as the result of population and resources balance in their surroundings).
Speakijg of that, there are two categories of Kixeli in their communities: Kel (swimmer) and Arasit (flier).
Arasit are just a rare continuation of their life cycle, since most Kixeli kids end up growing into Kel adults.
Sometimes, though, an Arasit will develop in case the community strongly needs to seek out new territory over long distance (triggered by close proximity to many other Kixeli and a variety of other unknown gactors, like grasshoppers turnkng into locusts.) They can’t truly fly, but they can use the powerful ocean winds and even some launching technology to glide very far to scout new resources and other communities).
Arasit are highly celebrated as voyagers, but Kel are also valued as providers for their existing community and even accompany voyages on ships to help their Arasit stay alive.
Some Arasit will cut and cauterize their membranes to make it easier for them to swim to symbolize they are staying in the community, though usually, they just poke small holes in there so they can wear clothes and be sanitary.
Their blood uses the hemocyanin molecule to carry oxygen, making their blood a bright blue when oxygenated and a thin blue/clear when unoxygenated (so you can see the other warmish colored pigments in there when it’s inside them, that yellowish stuff)
Their ancestors dwelled in deeper, cooler water where this blood type was most advantageous, but a global warming period brought them up to warm waters and eventually above the surface to capitalize on resources.
During this process, they developed some ways to improve the molecule’s lower efficiency in the heat. For one, they kept a small body size so there’s less to deal with. Another thing is that they get oxygen (albeit a small amount) from all over their body constantly through their skin, also somewhat making up for it.
The main mechanism, though, is their metabolism/temperature. They can quickly adjust their metabolism depending on the oxygen conditions in their surroundings to prevent immediate failure if they don’t have access to the right conditions to otherwise cope (this, and along with hemocyanin’s natural ability to handle low oxygen and their skin breathing, means they can tolerate very low oxygen areas that would cause a human to faint, though they’ll typically be pretty out of commission too, and this can have longer lasting effects on their health from the whiplash.)
they use their surroundings for heat when they aren’t doing anything too strenuous, and because they aren’t really producing much of their own they can tolerate even higher temperatures that would normally put them out of commission (and they actually heavily rely on that heat for ease in a lot of other processes), to do anything that has bigger oxygen needs, they can dip into cooler water/shade for periods of higher activity (but can’t stay too cold for too long or else aforementioned other processes will shut down, though it does increase the effectiveness to the point where they can do a whole lot and allows them to swim/navigate cooler areas where their early competitors couldn’t return to, it only as long as they got back quickly and warmed up)
they basically swing between these two extremes but tend to stay at a warmish middle-ground, wearing heating pads on part of their body while still letting larger areas cool off, if that makes sense.
Hemocyanin’s other properties don’t automatically give them a longer life, in fact theirs is very short compared to other species, but it does make them resistant to cancers (a common threat on their sunny planet) and the spread of diseases in their dense communities
Being cold-blooded wasn’t a problem on their mostly tropical planet. It is a considerable problem once they left it, though, hence the heating pads most wear to warm up.
many also live in areas without a large body of water nearby (or an easy way to access said body of water) but still need to stay damp to maintain their music layer and trap oxygen, so many also carry spray bottles or wet rags with them to always stay damp.
Kixeli are highly social (with their name even roughly translating to "belonging together"). they rarely live in groups of less than 5.
They experience severe negative side effects from isolation. Their naturally intense empathy also makes it extremely damaging for them to see other Kixeli injured or dead, sometimes leading to their own death from shock if they were the one that did it (though this has not stopped wars over their scarce resources in the past, typically because that intense sense of kinship was naturally strongest towards those among their own community, and if Their community was suffering then they had to get rid of the source of it by any means. )
This period nearly drove them to extinction, and led to a Global Community movement that argued for intercommunity cooperation and the end of 'us and them thinking'.
Due to their sliminess, Kixeli normally keep clothing to a minimum and overall don’t have a need for it beyond temperature control and ornamentation.
They have none of their own social taboos about nakedness, having no external genitalia, but still often clothe themselves to the standards of others due to the pressure/need to be polite from other species.
They also have few class divides within their own communities, with everyone working for the good of the whole, and no sex/gender roles beyond squirter and egg layer since everyone cares for the eggs.
To humans, their language sounds like birdsong, with lots of repetitive noises and subtle shifts in pattern and tone.
Their unique vocalization makes their languages hard to learn and even harder to speak, but they themselves are incredible mimics (only surpassed in some ways by humans because lips and teeth).
The fin on their forehead is similar to eyebrows in communicating emotion or tone. They can see a similar color spectrum to humans and love bright contrasting colors similar to their own skin patterns.
They favor “fast food”, or anything that can be carried easily as you swing around in a tree or on a boat.
Payment/restaurants doesn’t really exist for them, they just have areas where food brought in by providers is available to the community (or people just eat what they catch and then bring extra to the community.)
They also don’t chew their food, though some dishes are meant to be squished to the roof of the mouth with the tongue to experience the flavor
Their clothing is often “readable” in that many individuals wear clothing that represents a certain story, event in their life, event in their community, or mythical hero that can be derived from looking at their clothing from the head down.
In the two guys up there, the Arasit is wearing the equivalent of booty shorts cut scantily close to their Hole depicting one version about the founding of the first community (though a simplified one, so it’s actually more like the equivalent of wearing a crop top tee with a little monochrome dog on it or something).
This kind of imagery is common among Arasit, even modern ones, because founding/birth/life are their associations in religious cultures.
The Kel alongside them is wearing a more complex getup meant to show the inciting incident of one of the nomadic communities mythic hero’s journey, when he was cast from the star sea by the wicked Long Arms into the deep sea.
This would be seen as all most goth since this part of the story is seen as eerie and it depicts their underworld along the hem and bracelets.
By wearing clothing associated with a specific figure//story, they can also show gender identity based on whether that figure or hod was male, female, neuther, etc(helping people draw the right conclusions despite the visible evidence of their sex written on all their skin. The clothing and any makeup done on the fin is usually their main reference point for judging how to address someone. )
235 notes · View notes
mockerycrow · 1 year ago
Note
Hello!!!!!! So i was wonderinfg if you could do a piece for cod mw2? A platonic 141 (other characters can be added if youd like) x (preferably 18-20 yr old) gn or fem reader. It can be a oneshot or headcannons, i dont mind either format!!! If you do a oneshot, any scenario (a mission, off duty, etc) is fine w me!!! You basically have free reign, just keep it strictly platonic, not even a smidge of the hints w the reader and romantic relationships 👍❤️
Ain’t That A Kick In The Head? (Platonic!141 x Fem!Reader)
Tumblr media
cod masterlist
A/N: YESS!! I LOVE PLATONIC FICS!! 99% of my writing so far has been romantic, kind of funny considering I’m aromantic and queer. thank you anon <3 i’m also sorry for taking so long. your speciality isn’t specified, but it can’t be demolitions, im sorry!! plot purposes.
[WARNINGS: mentioned misogyny, fluff.]
Tumblr media
Considering how young you are, you deal with quite a lot of people who have low expectations for you. To be fair, you don’t have much experience, but you are a quick learner and that’s very much needed on this base. You’re a Specialist, one rank above Private in the U.S. army ranks. When people first meet you, they expect you to be a coward, a twenty year old girl—is what they like to call you—who doesn’t know the difference between a 5.56 mm cartridge and a 7.62 mm cartridge, a clueless little girl. Of course you did not know everything, but it was clear you know enough and have enough skill as you’re apart of the 141.
When you were first picked for the team, Ghost was a bit skeptical. Your age played a big factor because he was concerned about your level of experience, but he overall trusts Price’s judgement. A huge part of it was him worried about how you would take in all of the traumatizing sights they see on every mission. How you would be able to take someone down without a second thought, even if they pleaded for their life. He didn’t voice this worry, nor did he do anything to “shield” you because he knows you know what you signed up for.
You physically train/spar with Ghost and Gaz separately frequently. They are different in size and in style of defense/attack, so they both give you great pointers on how to defend yourself and how to initiate an attack. You have a schedule with them; when you’re on base, you train with Gaz Mondays and Tuesdays and Ghosts on Thursdays, preferably early in the morning with Gaz and in the evening with Ghost. Even when you perfect your own style for attack and defense, you keep training with them; “So you don’t get rusty.”
Price knows what you signed up for, and he knows that he picked you, so like everyone else on the task force, he begins to train you. Being an expert in violence and timing—unconventional warfare too, he occasionally sits in on your training sessions with Gaz and/or Ghost. Sometimes, he talks with Gaz or Ghost beforehand to set up a specific scenario for you to find a way to get out of alive.
Being said, Price takes you out as well as the team to a training field, doing the exact same thing but in a more.. realistic scenario. Being so young, he figures you still have an unacceptable type of response with “fight, flight, or freeze”. His plan is to strip away the freeze response because that’s the one that will get you killed. He also very specifically has himself and your teammates as the enemies in this field because while you’re supposed to trust your team with your life, there’s also often betrayal in the field.
Soap is a demolitions expert, as well as a sniper. He absolutely refuses to let you handle real bombs at first because he knows you didn’t specialize in demolitions like he did. After spending a few months with you, he brings out non-dangerous replicas of bombs and replicated parts to begin to show you how to take a bomb apart/defuse it, when it’s best to let it explode, or how to put one together for emergencies. He absolutely 110% makes sure you know it’s for emergencies when he isn’t there. It’s not that he thinks you’re incapable, but he can’t help but worry. Him learning about how Gaz and Price met, how Price only had seconds to shove the hostage with a bomb vest strapped to him over that railing? Fucking terrifying to him.
Gaz also helps you complete your interrogation training—not being the interrogator, but then interrogatee. Undergoing several mentally challenging tests himself of this variety, he tasks himself with giving you pointers. Your task is to keep your mouth shut about intel and escape the facility and remain hidden, uncaptured during the entire test. He’s so incredibly used to uncomfortable situations, so his pointers during this—seeing that he passed this test himself, the only one who past it in his class—his advice is helpful.
Besides training with Ghost, he coaches you ambushes and stealth. Every time you’re caught in a test, he coaches you on how to evade, on how to remain hidden even when the enemy is right in front of you. He teaches you how to set up traps and ruses, what traps are most commonly used and spotted and what ones aren’t.
Overall, they know you’re inexperienced and young, but you quickly take their advice and training into account, and you get to teach them a thing or two when you arrive on base. You learn quick and Price finally feels as if you’re ready for an intense stealth mission, accompanied by the team. They don’t have any doubt held in their hearts for you, 100% trusting your abilities.
1K notes · View notes
blommp717 · 2 months ago
Note
i guess you don’t answer anymore but i’m hoping you at least read this because it’s genuine and i feel like i have nowhere else to post this. i just want someone to hear me. ignore this if it’s too long. i want to thank you for your posts. they are the only writings that have truly resonated with me ever since i discovered the law, neville, states, being, whatever we call this thing. but i’ll be honest i’m giving up today. i discovered the ‘law of attraction’ in 2019 when i was 18 years old. it is now getting to the last quarter of 2024 and i am 23 where i’ve evolved in understanding to where i found ‘nondualism’. i went from law of attraction -> law of assumption & neville goddard -> robotic affirming -> mindset fixing & joe dispensa -> states & edward art -> nondualism. however… i have never manifested a single thing in my life. i used to be filled with anxiety when i said this. fearing these words would cause it to keep going on but i don’t even want to fear anymore. it’s just the truth. your posts taught me that i don’t have to fear my words anymore anyways. i’ve had a dream for a long time. i don’t believe i will ever reach this dream anymore. along with that dream i also just really wanted good for my family and i. you know the basics like financial freedom, happiness, mended relationships. but throughout everything i’ve learned i could never make it work and i’m just done. i guess i will return to living a normal life and just hoping i make it. i hope i find happiness or just.. anything. i’m just letting go of it all because i feel like things shouldn’t be this hard. even going to caleb’s channel and watching his recent ‘your manifestation isn’t taking long, you are’ video…. i’m just… exhausted. i just dont know how to do this and i don’t think i can take life anymore anyways. but yeah i just wanted to say thank you. even though i could never find success, you taught me who I Am. and i’ll forever be grateful for your wisdom even though you’re a bit younger than me. i hope you find continued success and live a happy life. sincerely
THIS IS JUST THE FIRST PART TO THE HUGE POST, PLEASE TAKE YOUR TIME
After what felt like months away from tumblr I really dove into self-inquiry fully, and of course still am, and I promised you guys a mega post so here’s the initial information so far. There is more to come.
IM SORRY IF THERE ARE ERRORS IN GRAMMAR OR SMTH I WROTE THIS AT MANY DIFFERENT MOMENTS THROUGHOUT THE DAY!! FEEL FREE TO ASK QUESTIONS, ETC BUT PLS DONT ASK BY RESPONDING TO THIS POST, ITLL CAUSE SO MUCH SPAM ON THE FEED AND MY ASKS PAGE
Hello! Yes I have started looking back into my inbox (THERE ALLOT OF ASKS 😭😭🫶) but I absolutely plan on answering as many as possible, and because your post resonated with how I used to feel, I want to answer yours first.
So to begin with, It makes me so happy to know that what I’ve written has some kind of affect (that being positive). I can’t remember if I told you guys how old I was but I must have cus you seem to know 😭😭, yes I’m 19 we’re very close in age, this moment in life is when allot of us who figure out this stuff lean into it more because we realize how much of a leg up we have if we just “apply” the teachings this early on.
So first what I want to say to you is, no, your not giving up on a dream and neither are you going to live a normal life, I’ll make sure of that, this beautiful world that we step into gives us so much insight on what we inherently are. But I need to remind you and everyone else, this is not some big secret that has to be practiced, it’s a look at what we are and always will be. You have purpose and you deserve to be happy and enjoy a life that’s easy and fulfilling. I apologize in advance because this is going to be a pretty long post!! 🫶🫶
Let’s get rid of the labels and titles we’ve given these understandings as if they are for someone to learn and master. No one masters manifestation, no one will ever master manifestation and I truly don’t care for how many “success stories” they have, it doesn’t hold proving value of what they are (notice how I didn’t say who), we are not who’s, but that’s for later in the post.
The reason I’ve stepped away from the concept of manifesting is because it is inherently lack and separation based. No matter the teaching, they all seem to glorify the idea of getting and achieving which puts great pressure on success stories and all that rubbish. (Not me turning British) 😝😝, okay sorry, so yeah this also goes for nondualism, I don’t associate a title with what I learn, it’s not NonDualism it’s actually just self discovery in disguise of a teaching. But for this exact reason I don’t think to myself “I need to learn NonDualism better”, nononooooo I made this mistake wayyy to much due to the sole fact that I came in with the expectation that this would now teach me the secrets of manifesting. This is kind of the set up to more desire and lack, which is actually the opposite of the self-realization “journey”.
So, when you say you have never manifested anything in your life, I say this with incredible pleasure, that this is impossible, I know I know, before you start thinking to yourself that youve heard this before but I don’t think people go that in depth as to what that even means. So, your life and your problems, are not actually problems.
Self-realization is not the journey for the person to become consciousness, but to understand that you ARE consciousness to begin with. You does no reference a someone, but “ “.
This is going to be, quite a post so PLEASE hang in there. And I just want to add in, this is still not a seperate being trying to understand that it’s connected to conciousness, no, you as conciousness, infinite knowing, are so involved with the content that you appear as, you’ve tricked yourself into thinking that you are just 1 thing of the content. Let me use my first example.
We have given ourselves the greatest interpretation and key to knowing ourself, and that’s dreaming.
Every night, we sleep, HOORRAAYYYY, now let’s get into the details because this is where the magic happens and it clicks.
Take the moment before a dream appears, recognize that when the eyes are closed there’s this presence. Not the darkness, the presence. Something, but not a thing.
Stay here and forget the rest of the world exists for a moment. Now there is only this presence, it’s knowing, it’s being right? Now there’s no actual material but regardless, it is, something. This isn’t something out of this world it’s literally, you. From this, knowing or no-thingness, comes expressions, absolutely infinite potential, this is registered as a dream, but, before the dream in any way can be experienced, there always has to be some type of interpreter/lens, this comes in the form a person or better yet, senses. Of course, there’s nothing to the senses or the person but whatever it’s formulated from, which was that presence/knowing. The activity of this infinite potential that is the knowing, (you asleep) appears, only with the help of a pov/sight.
Nonetheless, it plays out, it plays stories of absolutely anything, for no reason at all, and as it does, we get lost to it, it starts to become real, and without even realizing it, it’s no longer a dream but something we’re experiencing, now you are the character in the dream and you naturally play out the dialogue and storyline and explore the fields, magic towers, and laugh and dance and make friends, and then you wake up.
When you wake up, you recognize “oh, nothing was actually happening”, now of course, when your the person in the dream it is very real, but even then, is it? Knowing what you know, there wasn’t actually a place with dialogue, no character of its own experience or life, no actual forests or fields and magic, no one actually laughing and dancing or friends, but simply the appearance of that. The illusion.
And it’s not that it’s only a formulation of you when you realize it is, but it always is, the dream doesn’t only become an illusion or “fake” when you wake up, it’s naturally just fake, REGARDLESS of how it seems to be. And regardless we sleep every night knowing that we’ll forget it’s a dream.
So I think you can see where I’m headed with this, I’m going to use the example Rupert Spira uses but twist it a bit.
You go to sleep in Australia and dream yourself in the streets of Paris, and you take on the identity of John, you don’t actually become John and experience the streets of Paris.
Now, John drinks coffee and he feels the sunlight warm his skin, sees the greenery, feels the wind, all of it. But despite the way it all seems the sunlight, the sensations that John has, is not actually real, and neither is John. John isn’t actually feeling anything, he doesn’t exist and there is no Paris being traveled. And it’s not John that realizes/awakens to the understanding that he’s fake and this is all a dream, it’s you, asleep in Australia that realizes it as you modulate/formulate as the streets of Paris, the coffee, and the greenery, and John, understand?
The activity of that presence, if you recall when we talked about closing your eyes, formulated as something that seemed so real, and that doesn’t give any reality to the dream itself, because there is no separating the knowing from the content known. Without the “space” for it to appear or form from, how on earth would there be the content? A bigger step forward is to realize that there isn’t even an actual dream occurring but it’s all the self knowing presence of, well, knowing. I want to add something very important before moving on.
Knowing does not happen for the purpose of pleasure, we naturally deconstruct false ideas like this as we go, but something you MUST understand about the nature of existence is, none of this is appearing for the purpose of ant experience, there isn’t actually an experience. No one is enjoying nor hating the illusion, it is simply an appearance.
In the same way that the aware/presence before the dream appears from it simply is, in this way, we are. It’s like saying the TV screen plays a movie and experiences it, or does it for the purpose of experience, no that’s silly, knowing has no inherent motive, it is, you (infinite knowing) don’t “happen” for a purpose, never mind happen at all, you are, and in this do you take form of something, your self aware nature of course knows the content of your own being, but that doesn’t mean the illusion can enjoy itself, or that you enjoy or experience the illusion, it’s just a plain appearance, and that’s it.
For example, when you close your eyes on this next demonstration, truly try to grasp the essence of what I’m trying to explain.
Bring from the nothingness/knowing when you close your eyes, a blue vase, know it in every aspect you can, incorporate every sense you can (even taste if your a little freaky 🫦🫦😭) and make it as present as possible. After you open your eyes I have a question for you. (I’m serious, do the damn practice it’ll help you) please take as much time you need to truly get in there (not too long I can’t wait all day)
okay hey, your back, now answer me this, from what did this immersive appearance take reality from? You and I know that there’s no actual vase despite its presence, no matter the vibrant or dull colors, no matter the feel, rough or glossy, its taste 🫦😭, its feel, etc. So what was the substance that formulated this? If you guessed knowing, your soooooo correct, if you didn’t it’s okay you get brownie points 🫶. But yes, now I need you to understand this verrrry clearly, the vase was not real!!!! Yet it appeared that way! This is AN ILLUSION SURPIRISISIEIEIEIEIEIEISISBWHH- yes. No matter how much you want to convince yourself and go back to the vase and its appearance and its feel or colors or any aspect of it, it wasn’t ACTUALLY happening and that means it didn’t take place for anyone or anywhere!!! All there was present was knowing, from knowing forms vase and every seemingly alternate way that it is known, feeling is a form of knowing, literally every sense is just a form of knowing. Every sense that was “used” to understand the vase was all just aspects and appearances of knowing, the color, the sounds, the taste, the feels, they didn’t formulate anywhere else, but nonetheless appeared as immersive and real because YOU BECAME FOCUSED ON THE CONTENT OF THE APPEARANCE RATHER THAN RECOGNIZE THAT IT WAS JUST APPEARANCE. And even though the content of the appearance you formed as became the focus, it still didn’t change the objective fact that there wasn’t someone actually there and experiencing it in any way.
The knowing in/on which appearances formulate is not something different than the appearance, there is nothing to the illusion but its reality, and its reality is knowing. In this way, the illusion couldn’t even be described as something real or taking place, as if it could exist apart from the source of it.
Knowing this is also knowing there is no such thing as the knowing OF, we never know of things or of experiences as if they are something seperate and exist seperatley from knowing itself, that’s literally impossible. Moving forward
You are not the person/character, and it’s not that you are a limited being and you have to wake up to the idea that you are infinite knowing, you have to realize that you were never something seperate, and that this is simply the modulation of your being, and it’s not a someone it’s more of a something.
Let’s starts stabilizing this.
To all of the experiences across centuries, theres one constant amongst the billions of people who’ve lived and are now and that is, I Am. We might not know for certain about anything else ever in this entire universe, and we might not even know who or what we are but for a fact we can say, yes, I am.
There’s no true word that can describe the infinite essence of being, so we use knowing or conciousness or god, all completely the same.
So, to every experience, without an ounce of doubt, there can be the claim, I am. This is knowing, and only from knowing comes the statement, because we must know we are in order to claim that we are. I think something that can capture this is a newborn, imagine yourself to be newly born, mere seconds I mean, eyes closed. You have no understand of anything, no thoughts, no memories, no identity, your pure experience is simply being/knowing, and I don’t mean the action of knowing, that’s not a real thing. Knowing is inherent, you don’t force it.
Going back to experiences. Any experience that is recognized, any seeing, and hearing, tasting touching, and of course feeling, is assumed to be the experience of the body and this is therefore falsely established as “me”, in doing so, we forget our true nature of freedom and limit our understanding and abilities to the limitations of the body.
I’m now going to help you realize the body is an interpreter, and not of a world that’s happening somewhere in time and space, but that the world is the interpretation/modulation/illusion/dream/appearance of our shared infinite being, AFTER being recognized through the interpretations, (sensations and perceptions). This also means that it’s in no way an actual measurement to what you fully are.
What experience is there to seeing? Better yet let me narrow it down, there is nothing to seeing as if there is someone doing the seeing. Seeing simply is. There’s no one to do it, just what is. There is sight, how is there an acknowledgment of the sight/seeing? There must be something to it that gives the understanding “oh I’m seeing this”. (Hint, it’s the same thing that let you know, that “I Am”). Knowing, yes, not knowing as an action, that’s not real, people don’t know, knowing is the essence of what we are (we are not people). But just wait for that. So all there is to sight is knowing, and I don’t think I have to do this but you can say the same about absolutely every other sense, because every single “experience” absolutely requires knowing. Without knowing, “experience” never is, I think we can all acknowledge that.
There is no such thing as the experience of being a human, Why are we deciding that this is what’s it’s like to be humans, we know humans we acknowledge humans but there is no such thing as being a human, in the same way that there’s no true way that there is something to being a fox or a bird or a rock, it’s only with labels are these ideas decided.
The only thing you’ll be able to muster up is memories, emotions, etc, but that doesn’t make it the inherent experience of being a human. Our first and only experience of what we are is knowing, and then knowing that we are, that’s it. In the same way that a babies first experience is not “I am a baby” or “I am a human”, rather it’s just knowing. If being human was our nature, that’s all we’d recognize, and from the very beginning. Our experience does not actually change from being/knowing, we simply forget that there is the knowing, and decide to focus on the body to be “me” or “human”.
You don’t need senses to know you are. Knowing is something unimaginable. Go ahead and try to find it by closing your eyes or even with them open. Can you grab or touch the knowing. Can you recognize its dimensions or what its appearance is? How old or young is it?
Do me a favor and find the edge where knowing starts and stops.
Let me know when you find it because you never will.
Even when you try, it’s only conciousness itself that searches for its own parameters.
By recognizing that your truly not the body, or this person you as knowing have pretended to become, the made up problems of the person disappear, well actually, you realize that there is no person that has problems, only an idea. Only the idea that I am someone and something is happening to me, I am something seperate and need saving. There isn’t actually a seperate self, the seperate self is the activity that you as knowing are, when you become involved with the content and forget your true nature. And what’s truly the main takeaway from this is that, even when it seems like you’ve lost it and now you have to restart and understand it all over again, you as knowing haven’t gone anywhere, your the one pretending to be something lost, and not on purpose, but because you involve yourself too heavily in the appearances without recognizing where they originate from.
From what we know so far, I hope in some way you’re able to recognize that there is no one doing manifestations and having success stories. You ARE the manifestation and it will NEVER be any other way, whether we recognize it or not, that’s the beauty. So no matter if we go on about this appearance of life and say we don’t get it and move on, you as conciousness will continue to play the roles, because there is no off switch to this.
I’m hope this has been able to start untying the blinds over your “eyes” and you’re starting to somewhat understand the truth of what you/we are. This is only the beginning and it’s only going to get more incredible and beautiful from here. But for now I’m shleeepy hehehe, I’ll talk to you soon, never ever give up on your dreams!!!! 🫶❤️❤️
85 notes · View notes