#who am i to be policing other people's queerness other people's bodies

[comebackali]

i am very sick and high on dimatapp so this will not be very coherent, but idk why the kristen stewart rolling stone cover is bugging me sm. it's like the harry styles wearing a dress cover to me. like don't be claiming to be gay if you aren't out there eating pussy, which i'm pretty sure kristen swetart really is out there eating pusssy, which good for her, but like, don't be claiming to be the "gayest, dykiest thing i've ever seen" if ur still like, hairless and sanitized all over ya know? and idk why it bugs me sm, because all of hollywood is hairless all over. like i can't tell you the amount of skinny, hairless hollywood women that i'm like, "woah wanna eat her out so bad." (see: olivia cook's savagexfenty photoshoot. baby why you bald down there?? 😭 and yet i want her sooo bad. or i see a lil of georgie henley's pit hair and suddenly i'm panting like a bitch in heat.) and it feels like i should be grateful? like at least she's trying, at least she's doing something. baby steps. but instead it just annoys me. like you made this thing for me and thanks i hate it. does anyone else feel like this?

[thejagermeister]

this might be a controversial opinion so i will preface by saying that max is one of my favorite characters in hatchetfield and i love him very much. however

i think some folks take parts of his canon characterization (namely, his emotional intelligence and the fact that he acts kinda sweet after the prank reveal) and their neurodivergent/queer/etc headcanons (which are perfectly valid! i am an "autistic trans girl max" guy through and through) and arrive to the conclusion that max wasn't actually that bad of a bully.

as in, he didn't bully the nerds for showing queer/nd traits, he bullied them for other reasons. but like. what other reasons would he have.

like sure, he flick-it tickets richie for being in his hallway, but that's because richie "stinks the place up," and max doesn't want that in his space. richie's self-proclaimed overactive sweat glands are either a health issue or a nd hygiene issue or a combination of both.

he targets pete because of the rumor that he has a small dick. some folks use this as evidence for trans pete (i wholeheartedly agree) but even if you don't consider it from that angle, it's still body-shaming.

ghost!max makes fun of ruth for daring to engage with her dream hobby in privacy. he makes pun after pun about theatre to rub it in. the whole point of bullying is to isolate people who are different, whether they're nd, queer, poor, people of color, disabled, etc...

the takeaway from the "difference between intent and impact" scene is that he uses his emotional intelligence and "inclusive" vocabulary to manipulate people, not that he actually learns anything about inclusion. he'd know what transgender means and would probably say he isn't transphobic, use all the "right" language, but then turn around and make fun of pete for his body.

the "bully uses victim's preferred pronoun!" memes are funny and i'm not trying to police anyone's fandom experience by saying you can't talk about max like that. softening his harsher traits in fanfic where the focus isn't on a max redemption isn't like, a crime. do whatever you want. but sometimes i get the feeling people straight-up forget the way he acts towards the nerds in canon.

to me, the appeal of a max redemption arc is that he goes from a terrible, cruel, arguably traumatized person, to someone who's willing to learn from his mistakes and make amends. not that he was already kind of an okay guy to begin with.

[scarefox]

Pisses me off and doesn't let me go that I learned a few days ago that the actors of "City of Stars" got called queerbaiter for kissing on the mouth in a tiktok meme / trend for fun (a trend so many did, just usually they kiss on the cheek or do whatever, these two are the first actually kissing on the mouth... 🤷‍♂️🤷‍♂️🤷‍♂️ who cares??). BUT Porsche was made to APOLOGISE about it (tho he doesn't fully understand what it means because duh.... there is nothing to understand here, he didn't do anything wrong...)!! Can you fucking believe this backwards shit happening with 2024s social media police?!?!? (and pretty sure lead on by people who aren't even queer themselves because all the queers I know are fine or indifferent with this stuff)

Congratulations @ the moral police / haters who literally told two real life men to not be allowed to kiss each other on the mouth just because they are not dating for real and they assume they are hetero.

This damn queerbaiting discourse going through the fandom on social media right now, where people being so hell bent over it that it MUST apply to real people too.... WHICH IT DOES NOT! Queerbaiting is literally about fictional content marketed towards queer people but then not delivering anything queer related in the fiction. It is literally a term made because of Supernatural and Teen Wolf baity marketing back then! BL is the exact opposite of that!! And even if you argue that the actors are doing fanservice, which isn't as fishy anymore as it was a few years ago, THEN they are still marketing their series with it WHICH IS QUEER and therefore still doesn't qualify as queerbaiting! If fans still doesn't understand that fanservice is mainly just fun and games and not real dating actors, then that too is not queerbaiting. And I am talking about nowadays fanservice, not TharnType era fanservice where they actually pretended to be more than just coworkers.

Real people can not queerbait, because you don't know their true sexuality. Even if they say they are straight, they could still keep private (or not even know themselves) that they are open to experiment or are questioning! And even IF they are 100% straight: Newsflash even 100% heterocis & people who are not dating are totally allowed to kiss each other on the mouth if they want to for funsies! Body autonomy, free will, consent and all that~

Also wouldn't it be great if even hetero guys kiss each other without fear and judgement?

[bougiebutchbinch]

I am not the ableism thought police

(in gentle response to an ask that I won't be publishing, as I don't want the tumblr user to get any blowback, and I think they were asking in good faith)

It is not inherently ableist to enjoy the OFMD finale, despite the fact that myself and many other physically disabled people are Really Fucking Uncomfortable with certain choices that were made.

You can like whatever you like. There will never be perfect media, and OFMD is better than... many shows in terms of its representation of queers and characters of colour, at least. Go forth and enjoy it! I'm not trying to take that away from you!

Here, however, is a handy list of things that ARE actual ableismsTM:

pretending the finale of your fave show is beyond reproach from physically disabled critics

dismissing the concerns and hurt of so many disabled fans who felt incredibly let down by the finale (and who want to know whether the writers consulted with disabled people before writing that whole scene (especially putting the words 'I want to go' in Izzy's mouth. jfc.))

mocking disabled people who are upset about how his self-acceptance arc as a disabled queer man ended - in a show that is trying to be progressive, no less!

making gross statements like "saying Izzy is disabled removes his character agency". Just. Wtf. I don't know how to explain to you that disabled people have agency, and that 'disability' isn't a Bad Scary Word.

claiming that just because you are physically disabled and you don't mind the finale, other physically disabled people shouldn't voice their concerns

expecting disabled people to hold your hand and reassure you that it's okay to like a show even if it Committed A Big Ol' Ableism

All of those things are ableist, and you should avoid them.

TL;DR: Love the show as much as you like. Just don't talk down to disabled fans who are raising very valid points about the ableism surrounding Izzy's death and burial. And don't demand that we emotionally coddle you and assure you that you are a good person if you liked the ending of S2.

As always, able-bodied people are encouraged to reblog - but don't join the conversation unless you are offering support.

[breadvidence]

How do you feel about the Marius/Javert ship a few people have been pitching lately (Marivert). Is the symbolism of the relationship between the police and the bourgeoise enough to make the ship work????

First, a question for you: who's been pitching lately?? what have I not been paying attention to?

& a more serious answer than you probably bargained for: I am pro all ships and actually have read two very tonally different fics that play out this pairing effectively enough. Fandom doesn't really need more than "the characters exist" to make a pairing happen, but I'd argue these two could actually work given they have an existing relationship to build on (not in the sense of "work romantically, wedding bells" but "result in a compelling story"). There's the obvious comedy potential given—well, they are who they are. However. I think Marius is overdrawn as comedic in fandom to the same degree that Javert's comedy is undersold, and you could do some interesting very earnest stuff playing off Marius' desire to be masculine, violent, dignified, etc., and the ways Javert sneers at that—maybe some agegap queer mentorship shit complicated by the fact that, ultimately, Javert as the police serves/surveils Marius as the bourgeois.

May I propose an unrelated absurdly serious fic, also:

Javert's suicide is diverted, & he goes full 19th c style lunatic over it & is institutionalized (I would have to do a disagreeable amount of research about how very-barely-socially-respectable insane people were managed at the time). In searching for solutions to the mysteries surrounding the barricade, Marius finds him, and he feels obligated to recover him from the squalid hospital conditions. There's some very tender-gross assistance with bathing, maybe lice. I feel like this is a great premise in which to deploy questionably realistic selective mutism as Javert struggles with the question of whether it is morally correct to clarify his history with Valjean. When Valjean shows up, he gaslight girlboss gatekeeps the shit out of both of them, deadpanning through his interaction with Javert effectively enough that Javert isn't actually sure this bourgeois is Valjean after all. And whoops I'm diverting myself to Valvert. Anyway for some reason Javert and Marius fuck and it's very morally dubious given the unexpected power difference, Javert is dependent on him for housing and food and social safety, he's not articulating desires or thoughts well, and—hm, perhaps there's been some delay on Marius' marriage with Cosette, he's painfully hungry for intimacy and he never intended to become so close to this other man's body, but—

[tumblingxelian]

Political Discourse - Retrospective

So, regarding some political discourse that happened on my blog earlier, I want to clarify some things.

1: Hyperbole doesn't translate well across text, this applies both to me and those I've spoken/argued with. Hyperbole doesn't translate well when one can't see the associated dramatic body language or tone that would serve to convey that.

2: Context is key, so if one does want to take issue with something its best to have all the pieces in place rather than expecting context clues to create a common frame of reference as it might in a verbal conversation.

3: Its much easier to just not bother and direct one's energy into more helpful and practical goals than arguing online.

On the more political front, I do have some thoughts however:

I am posting this in a good faith effort to not argue or antagonize:

Firstly, I feel that for all Americas horrifically out-sized influence on the world one cannot just dismiss domestic issues as unimportant. Even if we ignore the ripple effects of a right wing VS left wing president on a purely cultural level, the sheer number of queer people, women, and people of color who will be actively targeted if Trump gets back into power is staggering.

There is a marked difference between the parties on these fronts and people will live or die based on that. Let alone stuff like Trumps handling of Covid and how his intransigence basically fucked the rest of the world over, along with killing millions of Americans.

Basically, when the difference between the the parties of the most powerful nation on earth are so drastically different in terms of who even counts as human, being a one issue voter doesn’t really work as an ethical or even practical approach to politics —especially not addressing the kinds of issues making it hard to stomach voting for someone like Biden.

Secondly, I feel a lot of the discourse around the US & Israel's ties are not very helpful or accurate as they often seem to frame it as though they just became allies under Biden or otherwise that this is a new relationship. As it is, ties between the two countries are nearly a century old at this stage and disentangling from that is not easy.

What's more, a politically active American friend said that they feel a lot of Americans, themselves included, often oversimplify foreign policy and that it's never as simple as a good or bad decision.

In this case, America's main focus is trying to keep the war from going regional while not losing what influence they have over a nuclear equipped state in the Middle East.

(It was also notes how the messages of trying to "fight antisemitism" as opposed to just being blunt about the political realities was manipulative and poorly thought out at best.)

But the fact is, as horrific as what Israel is doing is, it's not something Biden just started supporting at random. America's ties are decades long and not easy to divest from without creating more instability and bloodshed in the long run.

So while I of course advocate for pushing for action on these fronts, its integral to both remember that foreign policy is a nightmare and that one will have far better luck using protest to force a Democratic president to change course than a GOP one who will just tell the police to shoot you.

Thirdly, I think its quite reasonable for none Americans to take an interest in these matters. Hell, I have been an activist for years, donating and campaigning on everything from America's forever war, to Palestinian rights, Queer rights both locally and internationally and beyond since childhood.

Add in that, even aside from morality, I've no shortage of friends in other nations who will be impacted by who is president and friends in America who are justly terrified of dying or having to flee the country should Trump get back in.

Put simply, I feel my and other none Americans persistent presence on the matter of who ends up in the White House can be regarded as selfish or coming from a place of privilege. We're asking you to vote because we can't and far more people will die and be hurt if Trump is in power, including yourselves.

We're trying to help.

Finally, I will not see eye to eye with other leftists, they will not see eye to eye with me. That's fine. Ultimately, though we disagree on how best energy should be directed for the common good, I don't think my counterparts, or I have ill intent or selfish motivations.

[kevin-ar-tuathal]

LGBTQ+ terminology - as Gaeilge ☘️🌈

Now, pardon me, but before I get to the meat of this post, the LGBTQ+ stuff, which is what I know we're all looking for 😁 I gotta do a little rant first

😌🙏😙💨

While I deeply appreciate the efforts of several groups over the last couple of years to translate English-language terminology and understanding of gender and sexuality, and the digression and non-conformity belonging thereto, I believe that, ultimately, it's a placeholding wedge-in that contributes to the wider problem of Anglicisation, or more accurately "Béarlachas", as it affects the Irish Gaelic language.

(Yes, I do be calling the language Gaelic - No, I am not American. I have a reason for doing so which I'll elaborate on in another post*.)

Now, Béarlachas is *not* borrowing and loaning words from English and using them seamlessly in Irish - a thiarcais, Irish speakers have been under the yoke of that language for over nine-hundred years, stating that we cannot adopt and adapt its words to our language is tone policing and language oppression of minority language speakers at it finest 🤌.

No, "Béarlachas" is the enforcement of the English-language thought process onto Irish. It comes from a place where thinking that English is more advanced, and has developed ways of understanding, and assuming that no other language, or in this case, Irish, has not caught up, or needs to rely on English.

You can see how this is a problem, right?

Queer people have always been everywhere. People distorting gender and sexuality norms have always been around. I remember growing up and an elderly family member from deep deep rural Ireland saying "Them townies always be looking down and calling peeple transvestites - sure out here that's only Amateur Dramatics!"

One of my parents has a story of knowing an "Auntie Bob" in their local town, someone who lived on the edge of the village, but not shunned by any modern transphobia standards.

There are so many queer stories lying under the surface - so plentiful that I'd encourage anyone to talk to older family members, or elderly people in your community. Now obviously, they won't have our modern terms like "queer" and "transgender" for them, but the stories, the people, are there 🎊.

- rant ends -

Anois! What we've all been waiting for:

LGBTQ+ slang, slurs, terms and explanations in the Irish language 🏳️‍🌈🥳

Starting off, what does the Irish language call "gender" and "sexuality"??

Sex (the act) is usually referred to by learners, second-language speakers and official dictionaries as "gnéas" - but a lot of vernacular speakers refer to it as:

Collaíocht

The word comes from the word collaí, meaning "carnal / sexual", which itself comes from the word colla, which in turn is a variant plural form of the word colainn, meaning "body". So a way of understanding collaíocht, would be thinking of it as meaning "body-ing", which ultimately, I think, is a cuter, more accurate and reflective way of referring to the act than Sex.

Gnéas

This is the word most dictionaries have down to describe the act, but let's have a fresh look at the word. Just as teas (heat) comes from the word te (hot), the word gnéas comes from the word gné. The following is the entry from the Ó Dónaill (1977) 'Irish-English Dictionary' for 'gné':

1. Species, kind...

2. Form, appearance

Form, appearance... further down the entry, we also have the word "aspect", as in "every aspect of the matter"... I wonder... sounds an awful lot like gender here to me - and at the time of Ó Dónaill, Ua Maoileoin and de Bhaldraithe composing their dictionaries, 'sex' and 'gender' would have been interchangeable terms.

While I have yet to look into this further, I have to wonder whether ascribing "gnéas" to the act of sex, rather than sex as in "gender" is a case of Béarlachas: applying English-language understandings to Irish-language words.

Which brings me around to:

Inscne

The word that I suspect of being a definite case of applying an English-language understanding to an Irish-language word. Inscne comes from Sean-Ghaeilge "insce", meaning a saying, a statement or word, and was applied to the sense of grammatical gender, or 'noun class'. Modern groups and most second language speakers apply the word to the English understanding of gender (most vernacular speakers I know simply borrow "gender" from English). Again, my own opinion and proposition, would be to use gnéas for gender, collaíocht for the act of sex, and cineál for sex (body type).

Cineál

Furthermore, Scottish Gaelic 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿 also uses 'gnè' for gender, and 'tar-ghnèitheach' for transgender. The word for sex as in body type is 'seòrsa' - which is equivalent to the Irish cineál, which also has been used to describe body types. I think this understanding of the word cineál would be great to separate the traditional understanding of gender = body, and help us in any case to destigmatise bodies 🤷.

*The above have been kinda the groundwork. Here come the slang and slurs™️ proper*

Piteog (derog.)

This is the one most people who've done a little digging will've come across. The explanation that usually comes with it is 'effeminate man, sissy' or 'fairy (derogatory)' - but let's break down this word more, and discover the misogyny, reductiveness, wlw-erasure and why it to really only refers to mlm and transfeminine members of the LGBTQ+ community:

Pit is the Irish for 'vulva'. -óg or -eog is a suffix that kind of implies "like" - e.g. a camóg is something that's kinda cam (bent), i.e. a hurley. Piteog literally means "something like a vulva" 🤷.

Buachaill bán

No, not the Whiteboys of 1800s agrarian agitation in Ireland 🤣, but again another term for men-loving men. I think it's kinda poetic that the rainbow 🌈, the modern global symbol of LGBTQ+ people, is made up white light through a prism, and that the colour white was used to describe a sector of LGBTQ+ people in Ireland fadó.

*The only reason I'm saying this is an mlm term is because I've never come across it being used to describe wlw or other queer identities - but perhaps it could be used in a broader context?? Idk.

Lúbtha ("lúpthaí" i gConamara)

Literally translates as "bent". Lúb as a verb means "1. to loop, 2. to enmesh /to net, 3. to bend". Those in/from the Gaeltacht that I've spoken to of an older generation use it casually, with no obvious negative intent behind it, tho I've come across several middle-aged people who are scandalised if you say it (to the same extent as saying someone's 'bent' in English) but I dunno if that is from intergenerational difference is use (whether it became a slur in the last half-century or so) or if it comes from Gen X aversion to calling people 'bent' in English, and them correlating it to Lúbthaí in Irish.

Cam (slur)

Cam is a slur. While yes, it simply means 'bent', it carries the connotations of "crooked, sly, conniving" and in its usage, it is almost always unmistakeably intended as an insult.

Aiteach

I just want to put this on the list to discuss it. "Aiteach" is a modern construction. If you look up 'queer' in the dictionary, one of the entries you'll get is "ait", meaning 'pleasant, likeable, comical, fine, queer'. Ait is still used in everyday language (we all know the phrase "Is ait an mac an saol"), and was never used to describe LGBTQ+ people, but because of its positive connotations and appearance under "queer" in the dictionary, -each was added onto the end to describe LGBTQ+ people without having to use the abovementioned slurs. Yes, it is borderline Béarlachas, but most young Gaeil (Gaeltacht natives / vernacular speakers) I know don't have a problem with it 😁.

Gearrán

I've noticed the conspicuous gap of wlw specific terminology in this list. What can I say, 100 years of Catholic nationalist censorship on top of a patriarchal organisation of society makes them hard to come by. However, while I've never heard this word used, I've been seeing Gearrán more and more in online spaces lately.

(No, it's not related to gearán (complaint), and the two r's change the vowel sound of the 'ea')

It translates to a gelding, or a pack-horse, and according to Ó Dónaill (1977), can also mean a "Strong-boned woman; drudge, jade", and if that isn't a euphemism for a butch lesbian, idk what is.

Alright, that is an infodump and a half!

And there's still so much I could say... Lads, let's just say there's loads more to come 🤣

Slán tamaill 👋

[gatheringbones]

[“Alex tells me he had long been aware of the existence of transsexuals, and he had even contemplated transitioning earlier in his life. He had known a couple of people over the years who had transitioned, but he had no idea of how to go about doing so, and he lacked the money and the wherewithal.

In the early 1990s, “the conversation changed,” he says, making it possible for him to contemplate transitioning. He heard about support groups for transgender men. FTM groups were forming in San Francisco and Seattle. A burgeoning “queer” movement was challenging the dominance of radical feminist ideas and was offering female-assigned individuals who wished to embrace their inner maleness a way to do so affirmatively, with a sense of pride. Writers and activists like Sandy Stone and Kate Bornstein were talking about a different, more expansive understanding of the radical potential of gender switching, rejecting medicalized notions of trans people as having the “wrong body,” or as being mentally deficient. The term “transgender” was established as a way to move beyond the medical model of “transsexualism” and to include a broad array of gender-variant persons who wished to challenge the binary. It enabled Alex to call himself transgender.

“I did not want to have to say I was ‘crazy.’ I don’t even like saying I’m dysphoric, though I fit the narrative,” says Alex. “I didn’t start T until I found a very good doctor who didn’t demand a letter from a therapist. I wouldn’t confess dysphoria in order to get access to top surgery. I won’t do it. Why would I want to make myself even more marginal?” However, once there was a “weakening of pathology, of judgment,” he decided to move forward.

Meanwhile, Kristin, Alex’s closest friend, settled in Seattle after graduation, where she found an accepting culture and a lively butch presence in the lesbian community. She worked for a state representative, and when she visited the state capitol to lobby on his behalf, people sometimes perceived her “as a boy.” But mainly she felt okay about looking different, and she fell in love with a woman, Jennie, who affirmed her right to be who she was. Kristin is pretty flat chested and small hipped, and “looks like she wants to,” more or less. She presented as a masculine female. It helped that her family tended to be supportive. “Even though I don’t really operate as a woman, I operate in the sphere of women, and there were a lot of really strong women in my big Polish family!” Also her dad, now deceased, was queer, and her brother (who appears in this book) is a transgender man.

Because Kristin, unlike Alex, received a lot of support for her gender nonconformity, she said it never became a major source of distress for her—which isn’t to say that it hasn’t been a challenge at times. She contemplated transitioning for a while but eventually made peace with her body. Being in therapy helped. “I thought that my anxiety was special and everyone else was normal,” she tells me. But as she found ways to ease her generalized sense of anxiety, she became more comfortable with her body and her gender nonconformity. “I thought, ‘Why do I care so much about what other people think about my gender?’ I have a right. I have a fucking right to be who I am,” she tells me, her voice cracking.

And as she became more comfortable with herself, she found ways to deal with bathroom confrontations. “Now when people come up to me and tell me I’m in the wrong bathroom, sometimes I look my body up and down and look at them quizzically and say, ‘Oh, really?’ Thanks!” She makes light of it. “The more comfortable I am, the more likely they are to think I’m in the right place and leave me alone. Now it’s even funny at times.” But airports, she says, are still particularly challenging. Heightened security seems to extend to the policing of gendered bodies in bathrooms. The other day, a blond woman in her fifties came over to her as she entered a bathroom stall and started yelling, “You’re in the wrong place—the men’s room is over there.” Kristin just smiled and said, “Thank you,” and the woman left in a hurry.

“I get why some people transition,” says Kristin, “to be normal, and not have people gawking at you all day. It takes a whole lot of energy.” Still, she came to the conclusion that transitioning would not solve her problems, and that it might open up new, unknown challenges.

Alex, on the other hand, made the decision to modify his body and present as a male, and it has made his life much easier. He no longer gets harassed walking down the street, and he’s no longer as angry. “I still look young,” he tells me, “but at least the beard and receding hairline prove I’m through puberty!” He is much happier now, he says. “I honestly don’t feel I’ve changed that much. That is, ‘transitioning’ didn’t change me so much as it forced others to see me as I saw myself. Yes, the bodily transformations were welcome and comforting. I felt that I was finally ‘home.’ But how do you separate that feeling from the sense that you’re finally recognized by others for how you see yourself?”]

arlene stein, from unbound: transgender men and the remaking of identity, 2018

[marzipanandminutiae]

had a similar feeling about that photoshoot. i can understand how it is attractive, and i am certainly not about to moralise what one finds appealing. still, upon first sight i did think 1. hmm, this seems to hinge upon stewart being a thin woman, and 2. i do not like that when a queer woman becomes popular enough she begins to be photographed in more misogynistic settings, i.e. the fuckboy, woman pictured only on her back as a body to have sex with, etc? these are neutral if weary observations that i am only sharing as you have mentioned it, but again: i do not want to do the tumblr finding-of-problematics to make some one guilty about enjoying a photoshoot.

Yeah, for me it's like...I don't want to make this deeper than it is. I'm fully aware that, as a feminine queer woman who's more into other feminine women, no part of this is For Me. And that's perfectly fine! It doesn't have to be! I am one of 7 billion people in the world; expecting everything to be What I Like would be selfish and absurd. God knows, in my own beloved Murder Incest MovieTM fandom, I get annoyed enough with people not knowing the difference between "this is not my thing" and "this is morally terrible and if you like it you're a monster who should be pelted with bricks." I am NOT, EVER saying that about the KStew gym photoshoot.

Rather say that, I suppose, parts of it don't sit right with me? Her body type doesn't bother me so much as I was acknowledging that only certain types of women get to have their masculinity seen as desirable in any context, but the shot where she's looming above a faceless, splay-legged feminine woman (while presented like a stereotypical gym bro But Female) did leave a bad taste in my mouth. If that would be cringed at in a photoshoot with a male actor, why is it suddenly super-hot when a female actor does it? Not in the context of individuals' personal fantasies in which they're a consenting participant- good luck policing that; I'm not here to -but in the public eye. There's not necessarily a right answer; it's more a conversation worth having, IMO.

My reaction still isn't moral outrage, any more than yours is. More a mixture of "oh wow this thing that a lot of other sapphists find sexy is WILDLY unattractive to me; I will vent about that on my private blog" and "some aspects of this seem mildly distasteful to me."

I am extremely not saying "this photoshoot is Problematique and the actress and anyone who like it should be Cancelled; all public images of sexuality must be 100% morally correct." Do not willfully misinterpret my meaning, readers.

[mrs-monaghan]

No one is changing fucking narratives. Think about it you dumb idiots. You're in the closet, in a homophobic country, trying to live your best queer life in a glass closet. You leave enough hints about your sexuality & the person you love. Hickeys, GCF Tokyo with a queer love song. People either believe it or don't. And one day you're enjoying a significant COUPLE HOLIDAY in korea, with said partner you did all the above things with & the next thing you know its spread all over the internet.

Now I understand why Jikook are doing what they are nowadays. They were caught together on a couple holiday without members, by locals & since then, Jikook's public outings have stopped. The way JM even tried to downplay White day, which might have worked had he not posted JK on White Day before they were caught out, but still, the fact that he even felt he needed to play down the holiday & even stopped going to that place, should throw up major flags. They've always been able to leave room for deniability, but it's hard to explain a couple day outing. Seems it scared them into becoming more private. That & we have JM's mail stolen & privacy breached around the same time. Jikook obviously felt they could go out & didn't worry cause for the most part their privacy is respected. And now that they were, they been cautious since. This wasn't some premiere outing with two friends & cameras on a random day. We are talking 2 people who have spelled it out they are queer, who are rumored to be dating, who were caught out on their private time together, on a COUPLE HOLIDAY with no other members of BTS & it spread all over the internet. The only duo of BTS rumored to be dating and they are the only two caught out together on a real couple holiday. Yeah, its a big damn deal.

I just know Hybe and The members said something to them day. If they police Jikook during random photoshoots like we've seen or interject, when they are just having fun together, oh you know they came down on Jikook that day & they probably got blamed for it, even tho its not their fault someone took a pic and posted it. The timing of WD & Jikook's public outings coming to stop, is too perfectly timed for it to be a coincidence.

If I had a shilling for everytime someone said coincidence in regards to Jikook I would be a millionaire 😂😂😂😂 when are we gonna give this word up and accept there ain't no such thing as coincidence with these 2??

You wanna know what a coincidence is? This.

JK splashes Jimin 13 times. Their favourite number. Now that, is a coincidence. Because JK would have kept going had Jimin not asked him to stop. That is how u use the word coincidence.

JK using There for you a "gay" song for GCFT is NOT a coincidence.

Jimin appearing at the exact same lyrics during GCF Saipan is NOT a coincidence.

Both Jikook being from Busan, is a coincidence.

This, was NOT a coincidence.

Them wearing plasters on their fore fingers during a fan meet for no reason was NOT a coincidence

The J on JK's hand been directly ontop of the M is NOT a coincidence.

Jimin having a moon tattoo and JK having a sun tattoo is NOT a coincidence.

Jikook recounted once how they saw ghosts when they still lived at the dorm in their early years. JK said while showering he thought he saw a ghost but it turned out to be RM. Jimin said one time when showering he thought he saw a ghost but it turned out to be Suga. Everyone on twitter was like "aww what a coincidence! You are me i am you" Meanwhile I'm just over here like; Guys, 👏🏾they👏🏾were👏🏾showering👏🏾to👏🏾ge👏🏾ther. Their stories were too similar, that's literally the only explanation. HELLOOOO!!! Y'all give young Jikook too much credit 😂

Jikook posting at the same hour, same minute, exact same second is NOT a coincidence

JK coming live on white day and Jimin showing up in the comment section was NOT a coincidence.

Jikook having moles in the same spots of their bodies, that's a coincidence.

This. Is NOT a coincidence

They👏🏾sleep👏🏾to👏🏾ge👏🏾ther!!👏🏾

JK allowing an account kookminaredating into his game was NOT a coincidence.

Y'all catch my drift.

Sorry anon, I saw the word coincidence and went on a tangent but u are correct. With Jikook, coincidence should be used very lightly. And yes to the rest of your ask. 💜💜💜💜💜

[princess-of-thebes-1995]

Picture is not mine. Found it on Pinterest. I never seen the movie since I am busy. I want to. Bruno is handsome when young. My new love. Haha. I plan to do some empty x reader in the future after watching and understanding the movie.

There she was. The young woman of his dreams in the farmer's market holding that picnic basket.

She was shopping in the live crowd where varieties of vegetables and fruits were sold separately by shouting shop owners and assistants. 

The low shoulder top was white and embroidered with blue roses and her long skirt was the color of lovely teal.

What a beauty. All the single men were ogling at her. There was no way he stood a chance. All the admirers she had were always more handsome than Bruno. Bruno was a young man of twenty five. But, he was scrawny and had shaggy hair. Awkward too. Lime green queer eyes. What a mess he was.

Oh, well. Watching her from afar was good enough for him. He would not press his luck into actually talking to her. 

As he leaned against the tree he blinked when he saw a man perhaps six feet tall and muscular. He walked directly behind her and then sped up his pace. Now, he was close. He covered her mouth with one hand and used his other hand to lift her up and carry her away running at full speed!

Bruno gasped. What was he seeing!? Without a moment to lose, he came out of the shadows and sprinted towards her struggling attempted escape. She was squirming in the grasp of the kidnapper and was attempting to scream for help.

A van appeared and the man entered inside with her and closed the door. The van sped off. The people in the market were scared and shocked at the scene that happened. No one expected this in broad daylight. 

There was no choice left. Bruno stopped and concentrated. Green glow appeared around him and the smoke that emanated from his body caused shoppers and owners to scream and run away.

Bruno used his powers to tip the van over. Bruno hoped she was not that hurt. Thus Bruno ran over to the van and ripped open the sliding door. Sure enough, the lovely girl crawled out. She looked dazed and frightened like a dorm mouse.

Poor thing. Bryn thought. The driver moaned in pain as he rolled down the window. 

The young woman looked up at Bruno from her sitting position on the floor and gasped in surprise. "Who are you?"

"I am Bruno Madrigal "

The young woman's eyes widened in realization. The monster the whole neighborhood feared saved her life.

Bruno bent down on his knee and held his hand out to her to take.

The young woman took his hand immediately. She trusted Bruno. He was not the monster he was claimed to be. She yelped in surprise when Bruno began to carry her bridal style.

Bruno knew what she was going to ask. "I am taking you to the hospital."

The girl said nothing but relaxed her head on Bruno's chest. 

The police came and arrested the two kidnappers. You were just scratched from the van tipping over and were released soon. 

Bruno stayed with you the whole check up.

"Your wife needs rest and therapy after the whole fiasco. I made an appointment with a doctor next week."

Bruno's face reddened. To your surprise, so did yours.

"I just met her today." Bruno mumbled then shrugged his shoulders.

For some reason, that hurts your feelings. You actually did want to be his wife.

Bruno gently led you outside. 

"Thank you for saving me." You looked at him.

Bruno smiled then blushed red. "You're welcome."

You asked him to come over for dinner, you told him you want to be his friend.

He could not believe his ears! Like a dog, he nodded. "Can I bring my mom too?"

[starstruckbaby]

HELP

so i was just contacted by someone who lives in the kakuma refugee camp, they contacted me letting them know what the conditions are like for the LGBTQ+ people in the camp and the conditions are horrific for them. They experience police brutality, torture, persecution and other terrible things because they are queer or trans.

There are lesbians who have to sell their bodies basic needs such as food due to how terrible it is over there. While i may not know every detail of the situation i am still determined to raise awareness about the situation. I know i am not going to be heard by all butif at least one person reads then that is one person more who is aware.

You can help by donating to the gofundme page here

for more info you can visit the blog @stupendousanchorpirate and ask questions.

If you are unable to donate then reblogging or sharing in general would still be helpful and greatly appreciated. Thank you for reading.

[bassproblues]

Butch: The Good, The Meh, and The Ugly

A recent girlfriend of mine asked me about what it was like being butch. I flat out told her that, while I wouldn't have it any other way, it comes with so many problems the positives are nearly negated. I spent some more time thinking about it and feel just a tad differently. I think I spoke from a place of clouded judgement and wasn't really taking in the sum of my life. Below is my experience with butchness. And I fully own I am unique or unusual in some ways.

The Good:

* No line ever in the men's restroom.

* My body finally feels like home.

* I connect with men very well over things downstream from masculinity; hobbies, interests, traumas, and more.

* I pass as a man. People ignore me and leave me alone.

* I love it when a girl calls me handsome :)

* I am stone. My stone melts when I'm with a woman I can trust to not feminize me in the bedroom. It's a truly wonderful thing.

* I love the masculine preening that comes with butchness.

* I love being chivalrous -- spending a night on a girls couch to protect her from her ex who trashed the place, giving a woman my last $200 to pay for groceries for her and her kid.

* I love making women feel safe. I'm the one that walks them to their cars, tell their boyfriends to bug off when they get aggro, stay up late with them cause they're worried about an ex.

* I've maxed out my masculine personality (things like assertiveness, stoicism) in such a way that it perfectly contrasts my feminine traits (things like joy, gentleness). I feel like very complete and whole person.

The Meh:

* I don’t mind being called sir or ma’am, nor he or she. Neither one is offensive to me because I know that people are limited in their understanding of me unless they know me intimately.

* Gay men often hit on me. It's a very bizarre experience.

* I walk into queer spaces and feel like a goddamn space alien.

* Women expect me to be the pursuer in relationships.

* Women often regard me as some kind of exotic full-time crossdresser (see: The Ugly). As a result, they think I've got more sexual experience and am way more sexually active than I actually am.

* As a very masculine butch, I spend a lot of time defending that masculinity. It is a source of contention among LGBT and straight people alike.

* I am stone. Women often regard me in the bedroom as something they can "fix.

* AFAB Non-binary people often regard me as a gender therapist that has endless patience. I am not-- I am annoyed and want to be left alone.

* Forms and IDs with gender markers are the bane of my existence. I'm often the ridicule of police/security/ bouncers/bartenders/government pencil pushers when they realize my appearance does not resemble my sex unless I'm stripped down.

The Ugly:

* Women will 100% scream and call security and start crying when I use the women's bathroom. I have not used the women's restroom in 6 years.

* Many (ignorant) lesbians reject me outright because of my masculinity and question why they would not just date a man if they were going to date a butch.

* Lesbians and bisexuals sometimes treat me like a rare, exotic, crossdressing sex object. They can be quite predatory sometimes.

* Women and men often write me off as an inherently aggressive entity.

* Pop-feminism thinks I need to be enlightened and I don't know what's good for me. It often feels like modern day feminists admonish butches for not being more feminine in the streets and in the bedroom.

* Women sometimes think I'm butch because someone touched me as a kid and I'd grow up to hurt their kids. I was in 7th grade when a woman first expressed this fear to me.

* Men sometimes see me as a challenge to be overcome or as a threat to their identity. I can count on being jumped a few times a year.

* I pass as a man. People don't like feeling deceived.

* Women sometimes dip into 'masculinity is a lack of expression’ and forget that butches have feelings.

* Lesbians sometimes often write me off as an oppressor or a chauvinist. It often feels like I have no voice in those spaces.

[scenetocause]

Hey writing I hope they've explored each other bodies about Ollie and Kimi is weird, Kimi is 17 please chill for a few years

i am glad this has been brought up as i feel the queer side of fandom is insufficiently policed by people who think literally anything is illegal. there's a regular and normal number of people out there doing the job of checking no queer person accidentally takes joy in anything.

would i write explicit fic about them? absolutely not. will i use a meme phrase to talk about them? that's different.

[goonersaurus]

just lived through one of my worst days in recent years, a quite humiliating and draining day. pls send me drawing reqs or nice messages.

ive flown to another continent just to get back to my moms house the other day, where i will be spending the rest of june to have a grand pride month indeed. i‘m here to try to protect mom and find a way to get the person abusing her out of the house. i‘m so scared of what will happen, that the abuser will batter or kill my mom or myself or himself. i‘ve had to shield my mom with my body today, i‘ve had to beg the abuser to leave us alone. my mom called the police while he and i were arguing, and i begged her to drop the call. i begged the police not to come in the house when they did arrive, they went in anyway. now my anxiety spikes when i hear a sound in another part of the house and makes me cry out of nowhere.

i‘m now apart from my partner, the one person who i trust and feel safe around. my partner is who my mom refuses to acknowledge or respect due to her being the same sex as me. i‘ve already started abusing substances again, i‘m awful at coping.

why is it up to me to mediate? to sort out this problem, by begging, denigrating myself? I am queer, and i bring this up because the people in this house don‘t respect my sexuality identity nor my gender identity. the people who are meant to care for me the most don‘t respect or acknowledge my wife, and they have never cared to listen to me if i had struggles, invalidating me if i ever do bring it up. yet i have to constantly give validation, perform emotional labour, take on the role as trauma dumping ground.

and it doesn‘t help that the *one close friend* i had, a fellow qpoc who was the best friend i had in the shitty alienating city i currently live in, who i used to trust to speak with about personal, family issues, has been sending me hateful messages to me the past few days. i can speak with my partner about it but i still feel terribly alone.

i can post about it on my blog, where none of my followers actually know me, where i can have a public record that i existed, that i tried to protect who i loved, in case something does happen to me. despite my fear that i won’t be believed. i do want to come on this website just to distract myself and goof around but.. fuck it. it‘s my blog and i‘ll say whatever i want on it, who the fuck is bothering with this wall of text anyway? i‘m… scared for my life, tbh, for the lives of those i love. i can‘t believe im in this situation,

[lokiinmediasideblog]

On "Lady Loki" PSA: You mean Loki being Femme?

“Lady Loki” is NOT Loki being genderfluid. The name is a mixture of “Lady Sif” (because Sif’s title is “Lady” like “Lord”) and “Loki” because Loki stole Sif’s body after Ragnarok ensued, and trapped her in a dying old lady’s body. Loki first shows up possessing Sif’s body in Thor Vol. 3 # 5 back in 2007. Loki continued to use male pronouns in Sif’s body, but just gets misgendered by everyone else. And as much as I love aspects of Loki’s characterization in that era, having that plotline in this political climate would be awful, incredibly damaging, and way more problematic than anything the Loki show gets accused of. I need people to know what the fuck they’re talking about before they refer to wanting "Lady Loki" in the Loki show because this is what you're talking about.

I will be open and say I am not a fan of much of the majority of Thor comics. They are fucking annoying and read like some Gary Stu male fantasy because they’re always going off about how Thor is the fucking best and his plot armor makes him the only and best choice to be Asgard’s ruler despite there being other characters with similar qualities in Asgard but Thor’s “just better”. The misogyny is off the charts in these with all the ridiculously and impractically scantily clad “warrior” women that all want to fuck Thor and have little personality past that. I also loathe the “Loki’s just evil” crap. My fascination with them is more like gawking and wanting to be pissed off. Plus, I find pre-reincarnation Marvel comics!Loki to be a fascinating study of a Comics Code Authority/Hayes code era villain (and I kinda root for him because the narrative annoys me). He’s up there with all the Disney villains despite not originally being Disney.

In those pre-reincarnation comics that often piss me off, Loki is meant to evoke disgust and to “disturb” through his failure to be the epitome of manliness. Marvel has tried to distance themselves from that once they had their “Are we the baddies?” epiphany by retconning Asgard to be more progressive. It kinda annoys me because panels exist where they’re being queerphobic to Loki. To me, it’d feel more organic if Asgard was shown going through societal change rather than “We have always been progressive, what the fuck are you talking about?” But that's just me.

I remember when Loki was about to come out as bisexual in the comics on 2013 after becoming very popular largely due to Tom Hiddleston’s Loki (Young Avengers #13 where he flirts with Prodigy, followed by Agent of Asgard revealing he's a genderfluid shapeshifter in 2014), queer organizations expressed concern over the whole “queer-coded villain á la Buffalo Bill from Silence of the Lambs.” If you are not familiar with Buffalo Bill, he is the main antagonist from Thomas Harris’s very copagandic and transphobic book, Silence of The Lambs, the book with Hannibal Lecter (played by Anthony Hopkins who plays MCU!Odin lol) where he’s like “I ate his liver with some fava beans and a nice chianti. T-sss-tsss-tss.”

Buffalo Bill is said to not be a “real transgender”, whatever the fuck that means especially with all the policing around bodily autonomy, and some statistic about how transgenders are the least likely to be violent is shoehorned in, but everything about the character ends up being a queerphobic trope. The “difference” is that Jame Gumb “thinks” he wants to be a woman but doesn’t actually want to be (the transphobia in this book is off the charts).

I am glad Loki has gotten redemption arcs of sorts, because a lot of the tropes employed on comics!Loki just pissed me off. And I am glad MCU!Loki never went through the transphobic possession storyline in the name of being "comics-accurate".

The easiest way to represent genderfluidity in the MCU with a casting choice that predates Loki's coming out in comics would be through dialogue in the magic-less TVA. Have Loki say that her pronouns are she/her while looking the same because people can't shapeshift in real life.

I think if they ever adapt the Agent of Asgard thing (with a new actor), the casted actor should be genderqueer. Tom Hiddleston gets a pass because Loki was not genderqueer yet when he was casted and in 3 movies already (and he was playing the pre-JiM (2011) Loki), but the new one should be.