#while the dome is otherwise completely dark???
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
feelingtheaster99 · 1 year ago
Text
Props to the special effects and lighting team this season my GOD
23 notes · View notes
mostlysignssomeportents · 4 months ago
Text
Matt Bors’s “Justice Warriors: Vote Harder”
Tumblr media
On SEPTEMBER 24th, I'll be speaking IN PERSON at the BOSTON PUBLIC LIBRARY!
Tumblr media
There's no political satirist working today quite like Matt "Mr Gotcha" Bors, whose 2023 masterpiece Justice Warriors just got a timely – and brutally funny – sequel, Justice Warriors: Vote Harder:
https://www.mattbors.com/store/p/justice-warriors-ffzgn
You've doubtless seen Matt Bors's work, which has repeatedly attained viral liftoff, most notably with his Mr Gotcha strips, easily one of the most useful additions to online political debate in internet history:
https://thenib.com/mister-gotcha/
Last year, Bors, along with Ben Clarkson and Felipe Sobreiro, published Justice Warriors, a postapocalyptic cyberpunk graphic novel in the vein of Warren Ellis's classic Transmetropolitan:
https://pluralistic.net/2023/05/22/libras-assemble/#the-uz
Justice Warriors is the tale of Bubble City, a domed enclave walled off from the teeming masses of the UZ (which stands for "Uninhabited Zone" – see what they did there?). Bubble City runs on vibes, therapy-speak, social media nonsense, memes and garbage hot-takes. And while there's a lot of broad satire here, the thing that makes Justice Warriors stand out is how its creators do the relatively straightforward futuristic exercise of asking themselves, "What if deeply unserious nonsense was taken seriously?"
Others have done this before – Mike Judge's Idiocracy, say – but Bors, Clarkson and Sobreiro attain a density of sight gags, trenchant wordplay, and outrageous cyberpunk imagery that is just next level. Think Al Jaffee meets William Gibson, with art direction by Vaughn Bode, who's had one too many at the Mos Eisley Cantina. To that, mix in all kinds of MAD Magazine style fake ads and social media postings, layering joke on gag, all of it walking the fine line between "you gotta cry" and "you gotta laugh."
Justice Warriors did big numbers, selling out three printings, and now the gang is back together for the sequel, Vote Harder, which drops just in time for the final, all consuming election-season media apocalypse.
Vote Harder sees Bubble City facing its first election in living memory, as the mayor – who inherited his position from his "powerful, strapping Papa" – loses a confidence vote by the city's trustees. They're upset with his plan to bankrupt the city in order to buy a laser powerful enough to carve his likeness into the sun as a viral stunt for the launch of his comeback album. The trustees are in no way mollified by the fact that he expects to make a lot of money selling special branded sunglasses that allow Bubble City (and the mutant hordes of the Uninhabited Zone) to safely look into the sun and see what their tax dollars bought.
So it's time for an election, and the two candidates are going hard: there's the incumbent Mayor Prince; there's his half-sister and ex-girlfriend, Stufina Vipix XII, and there's a dark-horse candidate Flauf Tanko, a mutant-tank cyborg that went rogue after a militant Home Owners Association disabled it and its owners abandoned it. Flauf-Tanko is determined to give the masses of the Uninhabited Zone the representation they've been denied for so long, despite the structural impediments to this (UZers need to complete a questionnaire, sub-forms, have three forms of ID, and present a rental contract, drivers license, work permit and breeding license. They also need to get their paperwork signed in person at a VERI-VOTE location, then wait 14 days to get their voter IDs by mail. Also, districts of 2 million or more mutants are allocated the equivalent of only 250,000 votes, but only if 51% of eligible voters show up to the polls; otherwise, their votes are parceled out to other candidates per the terms of the Undervoting and Apathy Allotment Act).
Despite the structural advantages afforded to Mayor Prince – like the fact that residents of District 12 on floors 120-145 of the Bubble each get 2048 votes, while District 1 (floors 1-7) only get a single vote – he's not taking any chances. Officer Schitt (a humanoid poop emoji) and the lovelorn Officer Swamp (an anthropomorphic catfish) are each prowling the Uz . Swamp – suffering from a head injury and gripped by a delusion that a TV cowboy has sent him to infiltrate the Flauf Tanko campaign – is playing spy/provocateur, while Schitt hunts dangerous subversives.
What unfolds is a funny, bitter, superb piece of political satire that could not be better timed.
Tumblr media
The paperback edition of The Lost Cause, my nationally bestselling, hopeful solarpunk novel is out this month!
Tumblr media
If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:
https://pluralistic.net/2024/09/11/uninhabited-zone/#eremption-season
29 notes · View notes
pangtasias-atelier · 1 year ago
Note
Request are open eh? Then I wanna request something with Mauvier, This knight in shining armor has stolen my heart and I wanna see him get beeg~ (Could also include Vander too as that old butler knight also stole my heart too)
Hope you like how it came out! Cause definitely struggled on like just the idea lol but came to like it. Also I definitely enjoy Vander to take some old knight as well~
Warning: This is a fetish story!
The starry night sky rests above the Somniel’s residents’ heads. The serene night sky illuminates the scant few that remain awake in the dead of the night, most of the others already tucked in for another day’s peaceful rest with the waning moon to watch over them.
Mauvier currently passes the night in solitude. He patrols the impenetrable Somniel like all the others when their shift unfortunately occurs. Unlike the others, Mauvier’s patrol comes with zero comments or remarks. Already ingrained with all the characteristics of a true knight, the patrol is nothing more than a formality when it comes to Mauvier with the task something each and every single member of the army must do. All of Mauvier’s armor is stripped off; he wears his much more comfortable attire with no fear or worry of enemies. The consistent, light thud that sounds out with each heavy footstep is the only noise he makes in what would otherwise be complete silence from the tall man. His lance safely secured to his back, the royal knight instead has his staff drawn. The carvings and engraving that surround the gem are jagged, the usually soft designs of staves completely forgone on the strange equipment. The staff had been unrecognizable to any of the other staff users in the army, including Mauvier who had been the one to find it. And so, with the comfort of the relative darkness at his back, the few embers from the few lit torches flickering in the periphery of his eyes, Mauvier uses the the calming silence to aid his research. 
The fruits of Mauvier’s research is apparent on his body. Muavier not wearing his armor indeed comes from a lack of enemies. But it also comes from the knight being too portly to wear it anymore. 
Mauvier’s clothes are stretched out by the extra padding on his figure. The most affected by his sudden weight gain is his lower half. Weighing past 300 pounds—not that Mauvier has weighed himself or even been able to for that matter—the extra weight on his figure places him right past being pudgy or even fat, and right into being obese; even with his tall stature, the plush weight that frames his figure shows off the extra amount of fat that’s been added to his body in such a short amount of time.
Mauvier’s pants are stretched out by his girthy thighs. The steel heather gray fabric of his pants outlines the doughy curves of his legs. Mauvier’s thighs almost twice as thick as they used to be, the stretchy material holds on the best that it can; small tears that continuously grow with each step he takes and further stretches the fabric litter the sides of his pants. The front of his pants also have a few rips, his flab jutting out to freedom in between the torn holes and caught and squished by the strips of fabric that try to still hold his pants together. His fattened rear stretches out his pants far more than his pants however. The two flabby domes that make up his ass have completely torn through his pants, the fabric torn by a long rip that runs down the very center of his two round, flabby cheeks. The lower flaps of fabric that make up his vest no longer past his rear. They rest on the very upper curves of his ass now. His visible boxers somehow manage to fare better than his pants; though the fabric is stretched as thin as possible, the fabric even appearing a bit sheer now. Mauvier’s pants are unbuttoned. His belt is also undone, the lather strip of fabric taken off a while back. Mauvier’s stomach has a sizable paunch. The ball of belly fat drapes out in front of him, the slightly tanned belly exposed with the lower half peeking out of his vest. His chest also presses against the outer edges of his vest, though they remain properly dressed by the tunic that covers them—albeit straining to do so. His tunic is no longer as closely tied as before, the flab from his collar bone, multiple chins, and the rest of himself making the high neckline much lower and exposing a bit more of his skin.
Walking around, Mauvier raises his staff. He channels the latent energy stored inside the orb; the bundles of magic embrace his body as the staff is slowly cast, trickles of bright energy slowly swirling around above Mauvier before accelerating and crashing into his body with the force of nothing more than the slightest gust of wind. The staff looks exactly the same as Mauvier inspects it, his experiment giving the exact same result.
His waistline suffers from the failure, his entire body widening with some extra pounds that rounds out his body some more. The tear running down his ass audibly tears further down as they expand. He adjusts his thighs as he needs to widen his stance to accommodate his extra girth. 
Fixing his clothes to still try and cover him the best that he can, Mauvier only resulting in causing a few more tears, he turns around as he hears a couch sound out behind him. 
“I hope I am not interrupting something,” Vander stands in front of Mauvier. He keeps his usual cool demeanor despite how much Mauvier’s flabby body jiggles from just turning around. 
“Sir Vander, I apologize for my current state,” Mauvier adjusts his clothes once more. “I found this staff and since none in the army recognize it, I figured that I should figure out its effect,”
Vander gets a good eyeful of Mauvier’s bloated stomach as he looks down at the effects. “I see… In any case, I’m sure you’ve figured out that a staff that came from the corrupted can mean nothing good and figured out how to dispose of it,” Vander glares at the staff and the portly arm with torn sleeves that carries it. “We’ve both seen what it is meant to do,”
“With all due respect, I’m sure that this kind of effect isn’t the only reason for such a staff to exist. I can feel the magic. How it reacts as I draw it and comes close to completing its spell,” Mauvier ignores the way his stomach rumbles from hunger. “I’m sure I’m not casting it correctly. There must be more to this,”
Vander’s eyes soften for a moment but he pulls himself together at the obese Mauvier that now comes close to pushing 400 pounds in front of him. “I respect your dedication to making amends, but perhaps you could take a rest? Or wait to ask another for their assistance? I unfortunately know little when it comes to casting tomes or staves,”
For his part, Mauvier does glance down at the staff in his hands. He stares at it, the purple iridescent orb glimmering underneath the twinkling stars high above them. “I have one last idea. If that fails, then I will put this idea to rest for the moment,”
“I will allow it,” Vander stands back. He watches the stalwart knight but refuses to interfere any further. With his arms crossed, he waits expectantly.
Mauvier already begins casting the spell. “Thank you,” With closed eyes, he grips the staff with both hands. His pudgy fingers hold it tightly. He channels the staff just like all the other times. Magic beginning to materialize in the orb, Mauiver’s concentration only deepens. He puts all his magical energy into one, singular cast—the staff dropped by the corrupted, the item most likely requiring everything from its wielder much like how the Fell Dragon’s followers demand. Mauvier keeps his concentration, not even losing focus for a fraction of a section.
Vander still watching, his eyes widen at the sight in front of him. The aura hanging above Mauvier’s head can hardly be compared to his previous attempt. He keeps his distance but still remains near in case of emergency. Though he has complete faith in Mauvier.
And then the staff breaks, shattered pieces of crystal crumbling to the grass while the magic explodes above them.
Vander opens his eyes. Able to close them in time and cover his face with his arm, he slowly blinks to test his vision, the foggy, faint outlines in his eyesight slowly becoming more defined with each attempt. His clothes also seem to tighten. Glancing down at himself, Vander finds himself growing. Despite being so far away, the spell takes effect on the older knight. He receives an even larger effect than Mauvier’s previous incantations. Vander’s expertly sewed attire immediately begins to strain underneath his new bulk. Vander’s stomach quickly bloats out in front of him. His abs promptly fade away underneath a thick, widening layer of flab. His buttons slowly grow taut as his stomach continues to grow, a small bit of pudge turning into a squishable if little paunch that soon becomes a pile of flab for a gut. His gut still has some shape to it from being so far away from the spell along with Vander’s muscles still remaining underneath the extra flab. The buttons to his vest eventually pop from Vander’s blubbery gut. The dress shirt underneath manages to keep some buttons, on;y a couple lying on the floor with the fabric bunched up and rising up his belly to expose his happy trail. His chest suffers the same issue; Vander’s broad pecs lose some of their former definition but increase in width as flab begins to coat his meaty chest. Vander’s pecs turn into soft yet firm breasts, the two large breasts showing off both his newfound plushness alongside his usual firm strength he still has. The buttons on his dress shirt have completely torn off from his chest, the fabric forcibly ripped open to show off the chest hair that dusts his body. Vander’s biceps look even larger from the extra fat that rests atop his muscles. The two large arms have torn through the tight sleeves, bits of fabric ripped through by arms too big to be contained. His arms have flab sagging from them as he tries to adjust himself. Vander’s pants are snug on him. His lower half not receiving the same endowment as his upper half, the two meaty thighs still show off the extra weight he’s gained. His thick legs strain against the taut material of his pants. The waistband struggles from his widened waist. Vander tries his best to hold onto his belt but the growing pressure that only increases as he gets fatter forces him to unbuckle it before getting too fat to loosen it. The button to his pants thankfully manages to hold on. His ass stretches out his pants, the waistband slowly lowering as his ass grows larger.
Glancing down at himself, Vander can’t help but let out a small sigh. Comparable to how Mauvier was, he holds that thought as he remembers him. Turning his focus, he finds himself looking rather small next to the bloated figure that is Mauvier now.
Already obese before, Mauvier’s currently engorged size makes his former figure seem like a lean athlete’s. Mauvier is an absolute butterball of lard now. His weight is nearly doubled now by the miscast spell. Mauvier somehow still stands despite the amount of weight that swathes his corpulent figure. His ankles are swollen from the amount of weight that engorges them, the bloated, blubbery discs of lard combining with his thick ankle fat to droop down all around his feet and slightly cover them. His thighs are two columns of flab that stick out heavily on both sides of them, the two overladen limbs splayed out to give them some space, not that they get much, the inner rivulets of lard that make up his inner thighs crammed together. Mauvier’s pants are torn scraps, the shreds of fabric litter the floor around him, some shreds also gathered and stuck in between his folds of fat. His obese, rotund body manages to cover up his crotch with his gut sagging almost all the way down to his knees that have bundles of flab from his thighs sag onto the fattened, less flexible limbs. With no pants or boxers to clothe him, Mauvier’s ass is exposed in all its grandeur; the large rounded mass of fat that is his rear sticks out behind Mauvier. It wobbles with each deep, heavy breath he takes with drooping eyes at his size. The large chair cheeks are comparable to Vander’s gut in sheer size alone, each buttock large enough to struggle to be contained within one chair each. Mauiver’s gut is still respectable in its size, the large blubbery mass of fat needing more than a pair of hands to properly appreciate its size and heft now. His chest rivals the size of his own head. The two soft, malleable breasts sag down to rest atop his large gut, his swollen areolas engorged as well from the extra fat all over his body. Fat that Mauvier can’t properly look at, his tire for a neck blocking him from looking down along with his multiple bundles of fat that are his chins now. Even moving his arms are a chore at Mauvier’s size now, the motion looks far more deliberate as he swings each ponderous bicep that struggles to move with the lard that swathes his bicep and even his forearm, the two severely reducing the mobility in his elbows and wrists as they sag onto the limbs. 
“Hah…” Mauvier takes deep breaths. All his energy is now gone, reduced both from the magic he spent and from the strength required to keep himself standing. He looks down at the sound of a pair of approaching footsteps.
“Well then,” Vander’s gut presses into Mauvier’s own as he stands in front of him. A slight look of disappointment reaches his eyes but the older knight says nothing to show it. “With that experiment done, let me get you back to your room before anyone sees us,”
Mauvier goes to speak but finds himself unable to muster up any words. Only a few small grunts and moans escape his lips. His gut does the rest of the work for him, his stomach rumbling. Both the men ignore it however. They also ignore the way their love handles smoosh into each other and how their engorged arms squish as Vander helps Mauvier walk back to his room. 
“Good night Mauvier. I hope the other healers can find a cure for this tomorrow at the very least,” With nothing more than a small sigh, Vander heads off after closing the door. 
All Mauvier does is groan as he sits in bed. Unable to focus on anything besides his own gut, he holds back some noise while attempting to stand back up. “Need food,,,” The staff working its magic, the poor obese knight waddles to the Cafe Terrace to satisfy his cravings, completely unwilling to think about solving or reducing his weight.
20 notes · View notes
is-she-suffering · 7 months ago
Text
02/2003 - Black Velvet Magazine “Queen Adreena in Wonderland”
Tumblr media
(Interview with Katie Jane Garside - Taken From Black Velvet 35 - Feb 2003)
By David Jackson
In Milton Keynes, roundabouts have names. While frantically searching for ‘Eagle Stone’, a giant illuminated mountain on the horizon grows ever closer, eventually turning out to be a snow dome. Only in Milton Keynes. In an idealistic reality, Milton Keynes Pitz would be a dark smoke filled rock venue, located somewhere deep underground, out of reach of daylight with filthy walls and sticky floors, perfectly recreating the image the venue’s name paints. The truth is much less romantic. Located in the Woughton Leisure Centre, the Pitz sits firmly alongside a swimming pool while sharing a corridor with the health club and sun bedroom. Doubling as a theatre it’s not unfair to say the Pitz is one of the country’s less charismatic venues.
The public perception of QUEEN ADREENA vocalist and spokeswoman, Katie Jane Garside is varied, never quite consistent yet always fascinating. Appearing somewhat removed yet mysterious, she stands unique. Following Katie into the depths of the Milton Keynes Pitz, we arrive at the band’s dressing room. Informing me that she’s in a good mood, Katie takes a seat while continuing to arrange a small bunch of flowers in a glass on the table.
Queen Adreena are on tour in promotion of ‘Drink Me’. As a successor to their highly acclaimed debut ‘Taxidermy’, in many ways the album sounds a comfortable follow up. Finally settled, Black Velvet proceeds to ask Katie how happy she is with the final product. “In a way it’s not for me to say,” she cautiously begins. “We went through a lot making it. You do with every record, but this one particularly was quite difficult. It was kind of a year of reckoning in a way, writing and recording it. A lot of things that sustained me prior to that all fell away. I have a real sense of vertigo, no ground under my feet. I can’t really say if I’m happy or not with the album. To be honest the day that I am will be the day I don’t do it anymore. “Being on a planet in the middle of infinity with six miles of water underneath you and then infinity above you it doesn’t give you much to hold onto,” referring to her youth, part of which was spent living on a boat. “On the flip side of that, there’s infinity but if you get on the wrong side of the coin you can get into free fall terror. That’s sort of how I feel about that record, it’s just a page in the diary.”
It was author Lewis Carroll in his book, Alice in Wonderland, who first penned the words ‘Drink Me’, written on a label attached to a bottle from which Alice drinks and is subsequently shrunk. Was it from this that the album took its name? “Yes, it’s not hard to get there. Know your own poison really, that’s all it is. I’ve always found the only useful thing to do with fear is to run headlong into it, and that’s the only way it transforms, otherwise it’s always over your shoulder in your blind spot, so you have to sort of wrestle it to the ground really. It’s about knowing your own poison… Drink me.”
As the interview continues Katie’s fingers are in a constant state of activity, be it continuing to arrange flowers or further looping straps on her bag. However, every so often, Katie looks up, wide-eyed, with one of the MOST mesmerising stares I’ve ever seen. Many of Queen Adreena’s unique traits have carried over to the band’s second album. In many ways ‘Drink Me’ can be seen as an extension of ‘Taxidermy’. Or is it a completely new entity?
Pausing for thought Katie continues. “It is just another page in the diary. A lot of the things I said were sustaining me fell away, all the things that were keeping me upright sort of fell away, during that part of my life, making the record, I think it’s reduced things to their baser elements. In a way ‘Taxidermy’ is tugging in a lot of different directions. For me ‘Taxidermy’ is quite existentialist where I’m observing and witnessing and ‘Drink Me’ I’m taking part. I do use sexuality and violence to sort of beat myself back into existence because I’ve felt perpendicular. I’ve found myself to be dangerously insular. That again is what I said about the only useful thing to do with fear is to run headlong into it, because I lived in a tree house for a long time, just lived above everything, not taking part and I want to be here. Well I have to be here, otherwise I might as well not be here. As a kid I could never come downstairs to my own birthday party. I wanna take part, I actually wanna be there now, but I’m sick of living outside of everything.”
One apparent difference between debut and follow up album is Queen Adreena’s frequent use of dark atmospheric vocals seems to made way for a general heavier rock feel to the record. “The subtler things have fallen,” begins Katie. “Like a boiling pot it has reduced down to its really basic elements; it’s very minimalist. We’re trying to break the shell of the seed so the plant can fucking grow. Like my own life, we always watch from the wings and we wanna play the main stage. I am using violence and friction to create a chemical reaction hopefully. The only thing I find to be true is fiction that creates combustion and therefore doesn’t mean it’s easy or painful but it’s a fountain of youth in a way. It’s the only thing that turns me on and drives me forward.”
With only one single lifted from album ‘Drink Me’ (so far), the unusual decision was taken to release non-album track ‘FM Doll’. Not the usual procedure of album promotion.
“I didn’t want to look backwards. Making the record was kinda wrestling the thing to the ground,” describes Katie. “There was a great sense of relief. We’ve got a completely new rhythm section in effect now. I don’t want to sound like I’m doing my dirty washing, but we fired out old drummer after we did the album for the first time because it was not played very well. Then we went and recorded the whole thing in five days in a tiny demo studio. By the time we had the things in our hands it was, suffice to say, after finally getting the thing finished, we’d been writing like crazy and just thought there’s no point kinda eating yesterday’s dinner. FM Doll came out so quickly so natural and easily in a way. I feel like I kinda like parodying myself to such an extreme on that.”
The title of the single itself is one of hidden truths, quickly revealing a dark sub-text to the song. “It’s actually called ‘Fuck Me Doll’ and is about female objectification. In a way I shouldn’t really talk about it cause we’re desperate to get it onto daytime radio.” Treading her ground carefully Katie continues. “I know because of the lyrical content it won’t get on there. It’s about child murder. Do you remember the JonBenet case in America? The child beauty queen who was supposing murdered by her mother and father It’s about that and the endemic infection in the female psyche.”
Despite the somewhat unusual decisions surround the single release, as ever it’s accompanied with a promotional video. Talk of which is immediately greeted with laughter. “Well it’s a performance video, but, it’s sexy, that’s it. The whole thing with this is that I’m trying to burn down the cross that I’ve nailed myself to. It’s always about that. The illness that endemic in the female psyche, it’s just the way of the world where you’re just valued as an object. I think there’s a lot of power inherent in the feminine. I’ve always known it, used it, abused it myself so I’m can’t really go down a militant route with it because there’s a lot of power and joy within it. But it’s also for someone that’s not strong enough to carry it. It turns people into victims. It’s a very peculiar state I think that we’re in at the moment in history in terms of female objectification because it’s all supposedly coming up roses, but women are more effected by it than they ever were and playing into that role. What I do is hold up a mirror up to people and break it really for them.”
The lyrical content of Queen Adreena is in places beautiful and consistently fascinating.
 “That’s very kind of you,” replies a visually pleased and smiling Katie. “It’s not difficult at all. It just insists on coming out my mouth. I’d rather somebody shouted louder than me to quiet my own noise really. I mean that’s what playing live does, it just shuts the head noise down for a while. There’s so much noise from every angle it gives me a day off really once it strikes up and gets loud. It’s maintenance for me, it helps with survival. You’ve gotta put all that shit somewhere otherwise it turns into cancer.”
Talking about how the lyrics and music intertwine to make the final product, Katie Jane says “Crispin can get terribly upset with me. A song like ‘Silent Undoing’ I just wrote it at home. I’ve got a little wind organ I write stuff on. I’m not a musician, I can play a couple of notes very easily and there’s some chord buttons. For me I always write off an atmosphere. I’ve got six chord buttons and there must so however many combinations of those six chords so I can find that atmosphere that’s drilling in my head for that particular moment. Atmosphere’s everything. Everything that comes out I see in pictures. I’m just interpreting pictures, like snapshots but it’s always very vivid, it’s very much got a black line around it. In a way I have a hotline to the unconscious. Pity me, it’s not the best thing to have and I can’t turn it off. But that’s just intellectualising it. We always try to find clever words to make sense of what we can’t make sense of.”   The live show is one forum where Queen Adreena leave the onlooker completely mesmerised. Talking of playing live, Katie Janes says “I’ll give you the most fantastic and obvious cliché. Things that are important to me are fucking, wine and playing music and that’s it really. This thing of reduction, it’s all been about getting out of the head and into the body so it beats the military drum and calls us to war, and let the war of the fucking psyche commence. Here we are, what else could I be doing that would be more fun?” With a notorious reputation for performance how important an element of your music do you feel performing is? “I’ve always known it’s a real privilege to take the stage, it’s a very highly charged thing to do cause it’s a very un-natural thing to do.”
Do you think so? “Yeah! Why would anyone want to stand up in front of hundreds, hopefully thousands of people and almost beg them to tear one to pieces? Or on the flip side, when you catch the right side of the wave you can run up the sides of buildings and stuff like that, you capture a certain pure essence of something and that’s when magic happens. You step into a different realm. You walk through a door that’s not open very often, but you know you have to walk the knife-edge and be willing to throw yourself off the cliff, and that’s why I mean it’s very un-natural. ”
Taking the stance that it’s un-natural to stand in front of thousands of people and perform, are there any particular messages you hope Queen Adreena convey to their audience? “You know I take absolutely no responsibility for how I’m received; it’s nothing to do with me. I have a profound sense of displacement, like I said before, witnessing rather that taking part. I’m desperate to take part. Maybe everybody feels that, but it’s really under the microscope in my case and I’m very very aware of it. I have absolutely no message. I write little stories and I put them like photographs around myself in order to believe that I exist, or challenge the idea that I exist at least and that’s the beginning and the end of it.”
Flicking through her copy of Black Velvet Katie spots a ‘My Vitriol’ interview and proceeds to reminisce about the band live and mentions her admiration of bassist Carolyn. Continuing to chat about music I ask if there is anything in the current climate of music that interests her. “I don’t listen. Things come my way and I’ll listen to them once, but the thing that really does it for me always is white noise and distortion. I’ll listen to a constant CD of the sea; I lived on a boat when I was a kid. But before that,” pointing into the corner of her dressing room, “even the noise of that fucking fan, I find it really… I find is so reassuring for some reason. The sound of any white noise, like a fan or running water. For me listening to that stuff is like looking in the mirror. There are so many different voices in there and frequencies and harmonics and they tell me what to sing. I don’t mean THEY the great THEY, or the spirits. Just within white noise. There’s just this whole spectrum of frequency and it is like anything, if you stare at it long enough you’ll find a reflection of yourself within it. There’s always a story waiting to be told in there. That’s what I love, the wind, the sea.”
And with that my time with Katie is over, feeling like seconds but transpiring to be minutes. With a gig in a sports theatre looming closer Queen Adreena seem as unsuited to play such a venue as much as the venue paints an unrealistic image of itself. The delicately spoken Katie Jane Garside is one of the most intelligently fascinating women in rock. Collecting up her bunch of flowers Katie proceeds to position them carefully one by one into her hair before returning to the rest of Queen Adreena. For a further insight into the band visit www.queenadreena.com We’re informed ‘Everything is not obvious… explore.’
Tumblr media
4 notes · View notes
brawler1993 · 2 years ago
Text
RWBY Volume 8 - Deliciously Dark or Dreary and Dismal?
Ahead of Volume 9's premiere, I've finally completed by very extensive review of RWBY Volume 8.
RWBY Volume 8 is a weird one, because when I watched the final episode, I was left feeling really unsure of how I felt about it. If you listened to the RWBY recaps on The Entertainment Dome, you’ll know that my co-host and I were otherwise enjoying it until that last episode. For a short while, I reconsidered whether Volume 8 as a whole was actually quite bad and I just hadn’t realised yet. This…
Tumblr media
View On WordPress
2 notes · View notes
hgghgfd · 7 months ago
Text
02/2003 - Black Velvet Magazine “Queen Adreena in Wonderland”
Tumblr media
(Interview with Katie Jane Garside - Taken From Black Velvet 35 - Feb 2003)
By David Jackson
In Milton Keynes, roundabouts have names. While frantically searching for ‘Eagle Stone’, a giant illuminated mountain on the horizon grows ever closer, eventually turning out to be a snow dome. Only in Milton Keynes. In an idealistic reality, Milton Keynes Pitz would be a dark smoke filled rock venue, located somewhere deep underground, out of reach of daylight with filthy walls and sticky floors, perfectly recreating the image the venue’s name paints. The truth is much less romantic. Located in the Woughton Leisure Centre, the Pitz sits firmly alongside a swimming pool while sharing a corridor with the health club and sun bedroom. Doubling as a theatre it’s not unfair to say the Pitz is one of the country’s less charismatic venues.
The public perception of QUEEN ADREENA vocalist and spokeswoman, Katie Jane Garside is varied, never quite consistent yet always fascinating. Appearing somewhat removed yet mysterious, she stands unique. Following Katie into the depths of the Milton Keynes Pitz, we arrive at the band’s dressing room. Informing me that she’s in a good mood, Katie takes a seat while continuing to arrange a small bunch of flowers in a glass on the table.
Queen Adreena are on tour in promotion of ‘Drink Me’. As a successor to their highly acclaimed debut ‘Taxidermy’, in many ways the album sounds a comfortable follow up. Finally settled, Black Velvet proceeds to ask Katie how happy she is with the final product. “In a way it’s not for me to say,” she cautiously begins. “We went through a lot making it. You do with every record, but this one particularly was quite difficult. It was kind of a year of reckoning in a way, writing and recording it. A lot of things that sustained me prior to that all fell away. I have a real sense of vertigo, no ground under my feet. I can’t really say if I’m happy or not with the album. To be honest the day that I am will be the day I don’t do it anymore. “Being on a planet in the middle of infinity with six miles of water underneath you and then infinity above you it doesn’t give you much to hold onto,” referring to her youth, part of which was spent living on a boat. “On the flip side of that, there’s infinity but if you get on the wrong side of the coin you can get into free fall terror. That’s sort of how I feel about that record, it’s just a page in the diary.”
It was author Lewis Carroll in his book, Alice in Wonderland, who first penned the words ‘Drink Me’, written on a label attached to a bottle from which Alice drinks and is subsequently shrunk. Was it from this that the album took its name? “Yes, it’s not hard to get there. Know your own poison really, that’s all it is. I’ve always found the only useful thing to do with fear is to run headlong into it, and that’s the only way it transforms, otherwise it’s always over your shoulder in your blind spot, so you have to sort of wrestle it to the ground really. It’s about knowing your own poison… Drink me.”
As the interview continues Katie’s fingers are in a constant state of activity, be it continuing to arrange flowers or further looping straps on her bag. However, every so often, Katie looks up, wide-eyed, with one of the MOST mesmerising stares I’ve ever seen. Many of Queen Adreena’s unique traits have carried over to the band’s second album. In many ways ‘Drink Me’ can be seen as an extension of ‘Taxidermy’. Or is it a completely new entity?
Pausing for thought Katie continues. “It is just another page in the diary. A lot of the things I said were sustaining me fell away, all the things that were keeping me upright sort of fell away, during that part of my life, making the record, I think it’s reduced things to their baser elements. In a way ‘Taxidermy’ is tugging in a lot of different directions. For me ‘Taxidermy’ is quite existentialist where I’m observing and witnessing and ‘Drink Me’ I’m taking part. I do use sexuality and violence to sort of beat myself back into existence because I’ve felt perpendicular. I’ve found myself to be dangerously insular. That again is what I said about the only useful thing to do with fear is to run headlong into it, because I lived in a tree house for a long time, just lived above everything, not taking part and I want to be here. Well I have to be here, otherwise I might as well not be here. As a kid I could never come downstairs to my own birthday party. I wanna take part, I actually wanna be there now, but I’m sick of living outside of everything.”
One apparent difference between debut and follow up album is Queen Adreena’s frequent use of dark atmospheric vocals seems to made way for a general heavier rock feel to the record. “The subtler things have fallen,” begins Katie. “Like a boiling pot it has reduced down to its really basic elements; it’s very minimalist. We’re trying to break the shell of the seed so the plant can fucking grow. Like my own life, we always watch from the wings and we wanna play the main stage. I am using violence and friction to create a chemical reaction hopefully. The only thing I find to be true is fiction that creates combustion and therefore doesn’t mean it’s easy or painful but it’s a fountain of youth in a way. It’s the only thing that turns me on and drives me forward.”
With only one single lifted from album ‘Drink Me’ (so far), the unusual decision was taken to release non-album track ‘FM Doll’. Not the usual procedure of album promotion.
“I didn’t want to look backwards. Making the record was kinda wrestling the thing to the ground,” describes Katie. “There was a great sense of relief. We’ve got a completely new rhythm section in effect now. I don’t want to sound like I’m doing my dirty washing, but we fired out old drummer after we did the album for the first time because it was not played very well. Then we went and recorded the whole thing in five days in a tiny demo studio. By the time we had the things in our hands it was, suffice to say, after finally getting the thing finished, we’d been writing like crazy and just thought there’s no point kinda eating yesterday’s dinner. FM Doll came out so quickly so natural and easily in a way. I feel like I kinda like parodying myself to such an extreme on that.” The title of the single itself is one of hidden truths, quickly revealing a dark sub-text to the song. “It’s actually called ‘Fuck Me Doll’ and is about female objectification. In a way I shouldn’t really talk about it cause we’re desperate to get it onto daytime radio.” Treading her ground carefully Katie continues. “I know because of the lyrical content it won’t get on there. It’s about child murder. Do you remember the JonBenet case in America? The child beauty queen who was supposing murdered by her mother and father It’s about that and the endemic infection in the female psyche.”
Despite the somewhat unusual decisions surround the single release, as ever it’s accompanied with a promotional video. Talk of which is immediately greeted with laughter. “Well it’s a performance video, but, it’s sexy, that’s it. The whole thing with this is that I’m trying to burn down the cross that I’ve nailed myself to. It’s always about that. The illness that endemic in the female psyche, it’s just the way of the world where you’re just valued as an object. I think there’s a lot of power inherent in the feminine. I’ve always known it, used it, abused it myself so I’m can’t really go down a militant route with it because there’s a lot of power and joy within it. But it’s also for someone that’s not strong enough to carry it. It turns people into victims. It’s a very peculiar state I think that we’re in at the moment in history in terms of female objectification because it’s all supposedly coming up roses, but women are more effected by it than they ever were and playing into that role. What I do is hold up a mirror up to people and break it really for them.”
The lyrical content of Queen Adreena is in places beautiful and consistently fascinating.
 “That’s very kind of you,” replies a visually pleased and smiling Katie. “It’s not difficult at all. It just insists on coming out my mouth. I’d rather somebody shouted louder than me to quiet my own noise really. I mean that’s what playing live does, it just shuts the head noise down for a while. There’s so much noise from every angle it gives me a day off really once it strikes up and gets loud. It’s maintenance for me, it helps with survival. You’ve gotta put all that shit somewhere otherwise it turns into cancer.” Talking about how the lyrics and music intertwine to make the final product, Katie Jane says “Crispin can get terribly upset with me. A song like ‘Silent Undoing’ I just wrote it at home. I’ve got a little wind organ I write stuff on. I’m not a musician, I can play a couple of notes very easily and there’s some chord buttons. For me I always write off an atmosphere. I’ve got six chord buttons and there must so however many combinations of those six chords so I can find that atmosphere that’s drilling in my head for that particular moment. Atmosphere’s everything. Everything that comes out I see in pictures. I’m just interpreting pictures, like snapshots but it’s always very vivid, it’s very much got a black line around it. In a way I have a hotline to the unconscious. Pity me, it’s not the best thing to have and I can’t turn it off. But that’s just intellectualising it. We always try to find clever words to make sense of what we can’t make sense of.”   The live show is one forum where Queen Adreena leave the onlooker completely mesmerised. Talking of playing live, Katie Janes says “I’ll give you the most fantastic and obvious cliché. Things that are important to me are fucking, wine and playing music and that’s it really. This thing of reduction, it’s all been about getting out of the head and into the body so it beats the military drum and calls us to war, and let the war of the fucking psyche commence. Here we are, what else could I be doing that would be more fun?” With a notorious reputation for performance how important an element of your music do you feel performing is? “I’ve always known it’s a real privilege to take the stage, it’s a very highly charged thing to do cause it’s a very un-natural thing to do.”
Do you think so? “Yeah! Why would anyone want to stand up in front of hundreds, hopefully thousands of people and almost beg them to tear one to pieces? Or on the flip side, when you catch the right side of the wave you can run up the sides of buildings and stuff like that, you capture a certain pure essence of something and that’s when magic happens. You step into a different realm. You walk through a door that’s not open very often, but you know you have to walk the knife-edge and be willing to throw yourself off the cliff, and that’s why I mean it’s very un-natural. ”
Taking the stance that it’s un-natural to stand in front of thousands of people and perform, are there any particular messages you hope Queen Adreena convey to their audience? “You know I take absolutely no responsibility for how I’m received; it’s nothing to do with me. I have a profound sense of displacement, like I said before, witnessing rather that taking part. I’m desperate to take part. Maybe everybody feels that, but it’s really under the microscope in my case and I’m very very aware of it. I have absolutely no message. I write little stories and I put them like photographs around myself in order to believe that I exist, or challenge the idea that I exist at least and that’s the beginning and the end of it.”
Flicking through her copy of Black Velvet Katie spots a ‘My Vitriol’ interview and proceeds to reminisce about the band live and mentions her admiration of bassist Carolyn. Continuing to chat about music I ask if there is anything in the current climate of music that interests her. “I don’t listen. Things come my way and I’ll listen to them once, but the thing that really does it for me always is white noise and distortion. I’ll listen to a constant CD of the sea; I lived on a boat when I was a kid. But before that,” pointing into the corner of her dressing room, “even the noise of that fucking fan, I find it really… I find is so reassuring for some reason. The sound of any white noise, like a fan or running water. For me listening to that stuff is like looking in the mirror. There are so many different voices in there and frequencies and harmonics and they tell me what to sing. I don’t mean THEY the great THEY, or the spirits. Just within white noise. There’s just this whole spectrum of frequency and it is like anything, if you stare at it long enough you’ll find a reflection of yourself within it. There’s always a story waiting to be told in there. That’s what I love, the wind, the sea.”
And with that my time with Katie is over, feeling like seconds but transpiring to be minutes. With a gig in a sports theatre looming closer Queen Adreena seem as unsuited to play such a venue as much as the venue paints an unrealistic image of itself. The delicately spoken Katie Jane Garside is one of the most intelligently fascinating women in rock. Collecting up her bunch of flowers Katie proceeds to position them carefully one by one into her hair before returning to the rest of Queen Adreena. For a further insight into the band visit www.queenadreena.com We’re informed ‘Everything is not obvious… explore.’
Tumblr media
0 notes
roseaesynstylae · 9 months ago
Text
Heir to the Empire: Chapter 1
We begin with the Star Destroyer Chimaera moving through space. On the bridge is Captain Pellaeon, who reflects bitterly over the loss of the Executor at Endor five years previously.
"Even after five years Pellaeon couldn't help but wince at the memory of that image, the Executor, out of control, colliding with the unfinished Death Star and then disintegrating completely in the battle station's massive explosion. The loss of the ship itself had been bad enough; but the fact that it was the Executor had made it far worse. That particular Super Star Destroyer had been Darth Vader's personal ship, and despite the Dark Lord's legendary -- and often lethal-- capriciousness, serving aboard it had long been perceived as the quick line to promotion.
Which meant that when the Executor died, so also did a disproportionate fraction of the best young and midlevel officers and crewers."
I guess that explains Piett, then. He always seemed much more competent than other Imperial officers, and certainly more competent that Ozzel (who I suspect may have been inflicted on Vader as a punishment by the Emperor). This also makes the sacrifice of Arvel Crynyd even more impressive; he crippled the Empire even more in the long run.
Pellaeon heads to Grand Admiral Thrawn's meditation chamber, encountering Thrawn's Noghri bodyguard Rukh. We'll get to the Noghri more in the future. Fun fact: They were originally intended to be called "Sith," but George Lucas vetoed that as he wanted to use the term in the future.
The reader accompanies Pellaeon into the mediation chamber, which is also Thrawn's personal art museum. "The walls and domed ceiling were covered in flat paintings and planics, a few of them vaguely human-looking but most of distinctly alien origin. Various sculptures were scattered around, some freestanding, others on pedestals. In the center of the room was a double circle of repeater displays, the outer ring slightly higher than the inner ring. Both sets of displays, at least from what little Pellaeon could see, also seemed to be devoted to pictures of artwork."
And here we are introduced to Grand Admiral Thrawn. The first sentence of his description -- "his pale blue skin looking cool and subdued and very alien on his otherwise human frame" -- makes it clear that, even in terms of his appearance, he's not like other Imperial officers. We don't learn much about Thrawn's origins in this trilogy; it isn't until the Hand of Thrawn duology that we learn that his species is called the Chiss. This lack of information actually fits with his depiction in this trilogy. The audience only knows a little more about him than the characters in-universe do, and that's mainly due to the multiple perspectives. Of course, future books have explained a lot, but when this book first came out, Thrawn was a total cipher.
Thrawn reveals that the artwork is holographic due to the originals being inaccessible, a nice little touch I appreciated. Pellaeon agrees with him (in a way that's basically him trying to push through a subject he has no clue about politely) and tells him that scouts have returned from the Obroa-skai system.
Here's some information on Obroa-skai!
Obroa-skai is terrestrial ice planet in the Borderlands Region of the Inner Rim. It's best known for its library, reputed to contain the complete knowledge of the galaxy. 16,787 years before this scene, the Celebratus Archive was founded with the goal of collecting the complete date records of over 30,000 species. A Jedi training academy specializing in data collection and analysis was founded on the planet, but obviously isn't present at this time. While Obroa-skai itself first appeared in this book, the Fusei branch of the library appeared in the Star Wars newspaper strip originally published in 1979.
Okay, back to the story.
The scouts were apparently able to partially tap into the library system and are being pursued. Thrawn casually switches the subject to art, mentioning "'Saffa paintings... Circa 1550 to 2200, Pre-Empire Date. Note how the style changes -- right here -- at the first contact with the Thennqora. Over there are example of Paonidd extrassa art. Note the similarities with the early Saffa work, and also the mid-eighteenth-century Pre-Em Vaathkree flatsculp.'"
While I couldn't find anything on the Saffa, the Thennqora, and the Paonidd, I did find stuff on the Vaathkree.
The Vaathkree are a mineral-based sentient species, noted for being covered in armored plates and their devotion to trade and bartering. They live 300-350 years and have two stages of life. Vaathkree start life as small, shapeless non-sentient beings called Stonesingers. Over time, they develop rudimentary intelligence and absorb minerals. As they become more developed, they lose their fluidity and have to choose a form.
Tangent over. Back to the point.
Thrawn's art exposition (which I would happily read a book of) is interrupted by a lieutenant telling them that they're under attack. When Pellaeon hears that there are four New Republic Assault Frigates and at least three wings of X-wing fighters, he decides that a single Star Destroyer staffed by inexperienced crewers against those numbers are not odds he relishes. He tries to tell the crew to jump to lightspeed, only for Thrawn to interrupt him and order TIE fighters deployed.
This is where Zahn's background in writing military science fiction comes into play. Thrawn tells the bridge to rotate the ship twenty-degrees port yaw and the Sector Four sentry line to reform behind the attackers and jam all transmissions. Then, the TIE fighters execute the Marg Sabl maneuver. This is where Thrawn's interest in art becomes significant.
He explains, "'You see, Captain, there is an Elom commanding that task force... and the Elomin simply cannot handle the unstructured attack profile of a properly executed Marg Sabl.'" Thrawn's most famous aspect is vocalized here: "'Learn about art, Captain. When you understand a species' art, you understand that species.'"
An hour later, Thrawn tells Pellaeon to set course to a planet called Myrkr, providing some foreshadowing when he says that both the Old Republic and the Jedi left it alone for at least three hundred years despite it being well within their borders. That seems a little low, considering how ridiculously long the Jedi and the Republic were in existence, but I'm not sure when Myrkr was discovered, so it isn't necessarily an inconsistency. The other bit of information retrieved from Obroa-skai is the location of a place called Wayland. When Pellaeon asks what puzzle Thrawn is trying to solve, the Grand Admiral responds with a truly badass and intimidating line:
"'Why, the only puzzle worth solving, of course. The complete, total, and utter destruction of the Rebellion.'"
0 notes
feuqueerfire · 2 years ago
Text
April 2023 Movies/Shows Wrap-Up
A little monthly (spoilery!) wrap-up of all the shows, movies, and shorts I’ve watched or am watching in April 2023, general thoughts, and ranking of them all.
Recommendation of the month: Dirty Laundry was fun!
Ranking
The Merciless
Kiss Me Again: Pete-Kao cut (rewatch) = Dirty Laundry
Midnight Museum
Average Rating: 6.125/10 [lowest for the year so far :< hopefully better next month]
MDL Updates - Added to Watchlist:
A section because I’m curious about how many shows I decide to add to my Watch List a month and also the ratio of watching them:adding them.
Midnight Museum
I Go to School Not by Bus (2015): There’s this one tiktok I liked a while ago and haha yeah
Bed Friend
Unintentional Love Story
The Eighth Sense
To Watch List At Start Of Month: 56
To Watch List At End Of Month: 57 [Currently: Our Skyy 2, Bed Friend]
Removed from To Watch List:
None
Watching On-Air
Our Skyy 2 
Country: Thailand
Release Dates: Apr 19, 2023 - ONGOING
Watch Via: GMMTV YT (free)
Watch Dates: Apr 22 - ONGOING, 2023
Never Let Me Go: It was cute and fun and I'm happy to have seen Nueng and Palm one more time. Goodbye, Palm and Nueng. [6.5/10]
Star In My Mind: In Ep 1, they were soo cute and I liked scheming Daonuea. Ep 2 is boring rip. Also glad that Nuea initiates or reciprocates Kluen’s advances often enough it’s an uncomfortable dynamic otherwise. [5.5/10]
tags: our skyy 2, never let me go, gmmtv 2023, star in my mind
Also Appears In: Our Skyy 2 Live Blogging
Completely Watched
The Merciless (2017) - non-queer
Country: South Korea
Release Dates: May 17, 2017
Watch Via: Netflix, so :>
Watch Dates: Apr 1, 2023
Rating: 6.5/10
Overall Impression: I do like going into shows and movies knowing very little, so every twist was fun for me; none of it blew my mind but I was still surprised nearly every time because I wasn't trying to predict the twists or anything. Im Siwan is just really good at these sorts of roles I guess, his situation, dynamic with the other male lead, and ending had similarities to Strangers From Hell for sure (or I should say it the other way around because this came first). I wish so much of the movie wasn't in such darkness though, I can't fucking see rip. I wasn't that into the bromance aspect but did like how intertwined they were and how willing to trust the other and how that trust got betrayed.
Also Appears In: The Merciless Live Blogging
My School President non-rewatching rewatch because I'm watching the reaction by ReactionsByJavi. I've been obsessed with FourthGemini recently and am excited for OurSkyyxMSP and just want more of them (23.5 when?). I might watch some FourthGemini interviews and stuff too, who knows, but I've been following translation accounts for them and they've been so funny in their events this early April lol.
I watched all 12 eps reactions by ReactionsByJavi and 2, 3 + parts of 1, 12 by ธีร์สนุกสนาน [T sanuksanan]. I'm gonna raise my rating to 7.5 because I really liked this show :> and my favourite ep is 3. April 4: Gotta update rating in liveblogging, monthly wrap-up, 2023 masterlist, my spreadsheet, MDL, whew.
Midnight Museum - non-BL
Country: Thailand
Release Dates: Mar 6, 2023 - Apr 4, 2023
Watch Via: GMMTV YT (free)
Watch Dates: Apr 5 - 7, 2023
Rating: 5.5/10
Overall Impression: I liked the first half with the artifacts and side stories more than the second half where they tried to do too much for a short runtime, not too much budget, and mediocre writing skills. I couldn't make myself care about Khatha or Dome and also it was funny how they kept emphasizing phi-nong with words but so romantic in action. I wish the fantasy and magic and parallel universes and time travel and cult and God and whatever else made more sense together.
tags: midnight museum
Also Appears In: Midnight Museum Live Blogging
Agh, I have barely been watching anything this month.
I think after focusing on less romantic shows the first few months of the year, I’m just craving some regular old familiar cheesy low-stakes BL but I also don’t really wanna start a new show (and Bed Friend seems a little too stressful). Wasn’t sure what I wanted to even rewatch, so I rewatched Gifted S1 via ReactionsWithJavi reactions and on April 16, watched ep 9-11 of Love In The Air SkyPai story. 
Can’t wait for Our Skyy to start so that I can at least have that to fulfill my romance BLs but with familiar characters but also not rewatch a whole show; wanted something new with the familiar and Our Skyy really is made for that.
Kiss Me Again: Pete-Kao cut
Country: Thailand
Release Dates: Jun 19, 2018 - Aug 9, 2018
Watch Via: GMMTV YT (free)
Watch Dates: Apr 18, 2023
Rating: 6/10 [I’m not changing it from before]
Overall Impression: continuing on my can’t-watch-anything-new-that-i-have-high-hopes-for. I’ve been kinda craving like a very typical school BL that doesn’t have much going on outside of the ship dynamic and this delivers. Repressed and insane Pete who does stupid shit like get together with Mint again bc he thinks he’s jealous of Kao and then crash Kao and Sun’s dinner is so funny. Also the background music in this is jarring. Pete’s father continues to be great.  
Rewatched Moonlight Chicken Heart/LiMing scenes via ReactionswithJavi and ahhh I love them so bad like T.T 
Dirty Laundry
Country: Thailand
Release Dates: Jan 18, 2023 - Feb 2, 2023
Watch Via: GMMTV YT (free)
Watch Dates: Apr 25 - 28, 2023
Rating: 6/10
Overall Impression: Personally worth watching just to see the plethora of the gendered terms used with Night in drag/pretending to be kathoey (esp with Momey). Also liked the ending with “but who’s gonna direct?” [look into the camera] [screen with Directed by Jojo’s name] This was really fun and kept my attention well. I’ve seen people say that the humour didn’t work for them but it did for me. Also fun to see actors like Nanon, Film, Pond in these roles.
tags: dirty laundry
Rewatched SOTUS eps 9-13 and the second half of 15 lol I think I’m just maybe in a typical uni BL mood. rewatching is so fun though, I get to lament that there were so many girls in this engineering friend group and even a lesbian unlike these days where there are 0 to 1 female friends. Also, I didn’t know the Thai honorifics as much when I watched this over a year ago but now Kongpob being like “Then you can drop the formality of khun and phom and change to Phi and nong instead” and Arthit being like “That’s totally up to me. You got a problem with that?” ahhh it’s so alskdjak younger pursuer/seme/top/1/whatever my beloved
Started watching Bed Friend rip should’ve done earlier or waited 2 days but it is what it is. 
Wonder how much I’ll get to watch shows now that I’m gonna have a 9-5 for the next 4 months oof
Worked on GeminiFourth April Roundup this month, will try to do it for next month too
1 note · View note
jackzillanyanut8008 · 2 years ago
Text
Star Wars FA Rewrite Part 4
Author’s Note:
This rewrite is completely fan-made. I ,Stone CL Williams, am not the creator of these characters. They belong to George Lucas, Lucasfilm Entertainment, Lily and Mikaila Orchard, and Disney+ Entertainment. I am not claiming any of these properties of my own. In the event that I do otherwise, I will take full legal responsibility for the misuse of these characters. Please support the official creators and there content. Thank You
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Chapter 15: Two Teams, One Base
Varax had a hunch that Aliana liked Rey. You don’t need to be a space wizard to know that. But he figured that they would be good for each other. Much to Leia’s dismay. “Great, now on top of a retired Jedi Master and a hotshot pilot I now have to look over a Sith Lord with a Romeo complex” she says to Rey and Aliana after they tell the crew on the Falcon the news. Aliana gives Leia a look of disappointment “Nooooo not the Romeooooo” she says as she covers her face in her hands with a groan. Han and Chewie are laughing next to Leia and Varax even gets a good chuckle out before Leia tells them to stop being jackasses. 
“Regardless we still need to figure out a way to destroy the First Order’s superweapon: Starkiller Base” she says as she clears her throat. Finn stands up and points to a large tower on the planet’s surface “That tower leads directly into the planet's shield generator” Finn explains showing a red path to the inner crust of the former planet Ilum. “If we can plant some explosives on the generators below, it could disable their shields long enough for a bombing squad to finish it off” Finn adds as he crosses his arms. 
Han looks up at Finn with a grin “I’ll get you there, and I think Leia can scrounge up some bombs for us, but what about Kylo Ren?” Han says as he scratches his short, gray beard. “I’ll keep Ren preoccupied, I can lead him away long enough for you guys to plant the bombs” Varax says, putting his hands behind his head. Han and the others give him a look of uncertainty “You sure Varax? Kylo is-” Han attempts to say before Varax cuts him off “I’ve dealt with Kylo’s type before, sure he has power, but he can’t use it worth a damn” he says, almost deasing the Dark Jedi.
“Then it’s settled. Rey, Aliana, and Varax will lead Kylo away from the generators while Han, Chewbacca and Finn will plant the charges so Poe and Black Squadron can bombard the base.” Leia says as she stands up to leave. Everyone nods in agreement, understanding their roles in the mission at hand.
Varax walks out to get some air, he unclips his lightsaber from his belt and looks at it. “We were peacekeepers…” he says in his mind before re-clipping the lightsaber to his belt as he boards the Fury for takeoff. While on board he notices Rey and Aliana talking in the cockpit. They notice him and he gives them a gentle smile under his black goatee beard as he heads to the workshop to do a check on his saber “Lemme know when we get there!” He says as he shuts the door behind him. The Fury and Falcon take off and charter a course for the First Order’s front door.
Chapter 16: Darth Greaseball & Captain Chrome Dome
Varax has a fond memory of building his lightsaber. He remembers it originally being a regular single bladed saber. But as time grew on, Varax made more and more modifications to the saber, in hopes of perfecting the blade to be the best ever made. But thanks to his OCD, that likely will never happen. Varax sits back and observes his work, seeing the blade's cyan-blue Kyber crystal sitting in its chamber, glowing an almost white hue inside the dark workshop before Varax repairs the blade and heads out.
“Almost to Ilum, have a seat Varax” Aliana says, using the force to move a chair in the cockpit as the Fury and Falcon begin to exit hyperspace. “I haven’t been here in years, it almost feels like I’m a padawan in Luke’s Jedi Order again… Almost” Varax says solemnly as the land on a clearing in the middle of a forest. 
“Alright, let's distract Darth Greaseball” Varax says as he gets up from his seat. Aliana laughs at the insult for Kylo Ren “DARTH GREASEBALL HAH!!!” she exclaims, almost falling out of her pilot seat from laughing before Rey catches her. They both share a stare before looking up at Varax who's already off ship. Varax pulls out his binoculars and inspects the area, noticing the large, canyon-like gashes carved into Ilum’s crust. 
Meanwhile, Finn, Han, and Chewbacca are wandering the maze like hallways of the Maintenance Sector. Trying their best to find the shield reactors. “C’mon kid, where is this thing, didn’t you say you knew where it was?” Han says, almost out of breath. Chewbacca gives out a supportive grunt as Finn looks around. “Yeah well it is a big sector and sorry that I had to interrupt your nap time old man but we’ve gotta galaxy to save” Finn says, teasing Han for being old. Han gives off a chuckle “Hey with age comes experience Buckethead” he says, punching Finn’s arm before Finn pulls him and Chewie against the wall as a group of Stormtroopers walk past.
“I’ve got a bad feeling about this kid” Han says as he looks over Finn’s shoulder to check for guards. They walk out before seeing Captain Phasma walk right in front of them. Chewie grabs the silver Stormtrooper and pins her against the wall. Finn points his rifle at her silver helmet “Where’s the shield generator Phasma?” he says, finger on the trigger and ready to shoot. Phasma looks at the trio for a moment, “Down the hall to your right, can’t miss it” she says with a grunt. The trio look at each other, Han giving Chewbacca a nod as the Wookie drops Phasma into a trash compactor, much to Finn’s amusement. “Always wanted to do that” Han says as they head to the generator.
Chapter 17: A Scavenger, A Sith, and A Jedi
Varax, Rey and Aliana make their way through the rough terrain of the planet before coming up to a huge gathering of Stormtroopers. A massive speech is being held and led by General Hux with a hologram of Supreme Leader Snoke behind him, towering over his troops and officers. Varax looks at his companions and looks above, noticing a Dreadnaught overhead before hatching an idea. “Aliana I have an idea, if we can pull that Dreadnaught down into the cavern, the weapon may not fully fire” he says, pointing at the warship out in the atmosphere. Aliana looked at the Jedi like he was crazy. “I can’t move that thing, it's too big!!!” she says. 
“Only in your mind is it massive” Varax explains to Aliana. Aliana lets out a sigh “I guess it won’t hurt to try” she says before Varax cuts her off “No, do or do not, there is no try” Varax says, parroting the words of a wise old master he once had. “What does that even mean?!?!” Aliana says confusingly. “Uhhh, okay that might’ve been a bad example” Varax says, unsure what the small green Jedi meant when he enlightened Varax with that proverb “Master Yoda said it a lot though” he says sheepishly. 
Aliana rolls her eyes and outstretches her hand, Varax following after as the two pull the Dreadnaught into the atmosphere as it crashes down into the chasm behind them. Rey watches in awe at the feat, never thinking anyone Jedi, Sith, or otherwise could do such a thing. 
As the ship crashes into the canyon a beam of red energy is fired but quickly disperses as the Stormtroopers look around confused. Hux looks at the hologram of the Supreme Leader which disappears shortly after. The trio head inside the base and try to find a spot to contact Finn and the others. “That was awesome!!! You guys dragged that thing right into the planet’s crust!! How’d you do it?” Rey says and asks as they run through the halls.
Varax looks back at her “A trick I picked up from a Jedi named Galen Marek” he says, partially out of breath, “It tires you out pretty quick but it works!” he adds as they turn a corner to see Finn Han and Chewbacca on a lower floor planting the bombs. However they also see a squad of Stromtroopers rain fire down on them “Let’s give them some backup” Varax says as he throws back his black cloak and drops down to the troopers below, igniting his saber as he cuts the soldiers down. Aliana follows short and gets in on the carnage, Rey follows last and shoots a couple with her blaster.
Chapter 18: So Long Sweet Smuggler
As the fighting dies down, Han looks out across the nearby bridge and sees Kylo walking toward him. Han steps onto the bridge as the others deal with the troops. “BEN!!” He yells through the empty, black abyss stopping Kylo in his tracks. The Dark Jedi looks at the smuggler “Move aside old man, or die”. Han tosses his blaster behind him “Take off the mask son, I wanna see your face” he says. Kylo sits for a moment before removing his mask, dropping it onto the bridge in front of him. 
Varax quickly realizes what Han’s about to do “no,no,no,no,no” he says softly before calling out to Han “NO YOU DAMN FOOL DON’T DO IT!!!” Varax yells. Rey and the others look on in fear as Han approaches his son. Han looks at Varax and gives a salute as he crosses the bridge. “You’re not a monster Ben, come home, to your family” Han says to the Dark Jedi as he steps closer to his son.
Kylo walks up to his father, a brief flash of hope flies through him before he kills it. “I’m sorry dad” Kylo says flatly, before impaling him through the chest with his lightsaber “but the First Order is my family now” he adds, kicking his father into the white abyss below him.
“NO!!!” Rey and Varax say, as Finn and Aliana stand in shock. Chewbacca lets out a mighty roar as he blasts Kylo’s stomach with his Bow Blaster. Kylo keels over from the pain as he looks back at the Wookie, who roars at Kylo in anger before ramming through a group of Stormtroopers. 
“C’mon Rey we have to go!” Aliana says as she grabs Rey’s arm before she shoots Kylo across the face with her blaster pistol. Varax uses the Force to grab Han’s blaster as the five of them race back to their ship. On the way there Chewbacca detonates the shields as a cover to keep Ren off their back.
The five of them run through the forest before hearing Kylo call out to them. He looks at Finn “TRAITOR!!!” he yells at the former stormtrooper. Finn tries to shoot Kylo but the Dark Jedi freezes the bolts mid air and returns them back to Finn aiming right at his torso. As Finn falls to the ground, Rey grabs Aliana’s lightsaber and ignites it. Kylo Ren looks at her with a snarl “You’re nothing, desert trash! I come from the most powerful family in the galaxy. And you are a nobody” he says, poking at Rey
Rey looks at Kylo in rage, “I’m gonna make you hurt you greasy fuck!”
Chapter 19: The Wrath Of Irus
Rey screams as she charges Kylo and swings Aliana’s lightsaber like a crazed lunatic, Kylo hardly being able to keep up with her absurd speed and power as she locks in both their sabers and punches Kylo’s side, still raw from his wound from Chewbacca. Kylo coughs up a mouthful of blood as Rey disconnects the saber and starts smacking her saber against Kylo’s like a club, still screaming out her anger and rage.
Meanwhile, Aliana and Varax struggle to get Finn to 2V so he can fix his wounds. The two look back at Rey as she fights the Dark Jedi “She’ll be fine” Varax tells Aliana “Anger is the best tool in a fight, in some cultures she’d be worshiped as a queen” he says. Aliana gives Varax a look of concern “Yeah… not a good time” he says as they lay Finn down onto the operating table on the Fury.
Back in the forest, Kylo is trying his best to hold his own against Rey, who’s practically chasing him through the woods as she slices Aliana’s lightsabers through the trees trying to kill the Dark Jedi. “he was YOUR FATHER he CARED about YOU and YOU KILLED HIM IN COLD BLOOD!!!” she yells, her voice echoing through the treetops like a bestail howl. She eventually catches Kylo off guard and cuts through his blade, gashing the middle of his face as he collapses to the ground.
Before Rey could finish the job however, she’s pulled back to the Fury by the force. She looks up and sees Varax before he grabs her arm and pulls her into the ship as they take off. He pushes her onto the couch, a look of anger painted all over his face “WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU” he yells, his voice echoing through the ship. Rey tries to speak but Varax cuts her off “YOU COULD’VE JEOPARDIZED THIS ENTIRE MISSION AND ENDANGERED THE LIVES OF EVERYONE”. Rey looks down, realizing she's still holding Aliana’s lightsaber, she holds it up to the Sith “Sorry for taking it, I should’ve known better” she says, almost in a whisper as she gets up and heads to her room. Aliana looks at the blade, a few drops of Kylo’s blood sprinkled across the emitter. “I’ll go talk to her, maybe try to cheer her up, also THAT was uncalled for Varax” she says as she follows Rey to her room.
Varax sits in the living room, looks at the blade in his hands, and sighs. Before heading to bed.
(Final Part Coming Soon)
0 notes
writerleo86 · 2 years ago
Text
Armor Champions - Season 4 - The Cale Saga - Episode 194 (Do Not Copy)
   In the dark forest, the scared boy Camerion hid behind a large oak tree as he watched his older brother -- Desoto of the Black Shadow -- as a Super Kainobi strike his opponent using various kicks while Cale blocked everyone with his wrists and ankles.
   Once he gave his last kick, Desoto looked up and discovered that the sky had turned dark. The color of each cloud became black and grew larger. And the two fighters froze as bolts of lightning struck from the black clouds rising in the sky.
   An ailing Billy of the Ice Dome finally rose up as he cried "These clouds! I don't feel anything from them now but darkness."
   Cale gave out a sadistic laugh and informed the champions "The boy did it! The portal is opening! Once it is completely opened, you all will die!"
   Then the android gave another laugh while Billy trembled in fear.
   Billy yelled to Desoto "We must do something about that!"
   Desoto cried "How we gonna stop dat portal?"
   Billy thought to himself until he spotted Little Camerion hiding by the each tree nearby.
   "That's it!" Billy responded. "We need Camerion to stop the portal from opening!"
   "Ya mean dat Trey guy's right?" asked Desoto. "My little bro's a wizard like you?"
   Camerion quickly ran to the warriors and he cried "This is my fault! I opened that thing!"
   "Listen Camerion," Billy directed. "You have the power to stop this. You must do what you can to close that portal before whatever comes out will destroy this planet."
   "What if I don't know how?" cried Camerion. "I don't know exactly what I'm doing here!"
   "Don't worry," replied Billy. "I'm going to help you. I'm a Tao wizard too."
   "You too?" questioned Camerion. "You're a Tao wizard?"
   "Are ya sure?" asked Desoto.
   Billy shook his head and answered "I have no choice. The world's in danger."
   "Then," Camerion told Billy. "Let's do this."
   And Billy asked the cowboy in black armor "Can you cover us?"
   Super Desoto faced the wicked Cale who remained in the sky.
   And the cowboy answered "Fine! I owe dat rat an ass-whoopin' anyway!"
   A female's voice soon yelled "Don't forget about us!"
Armor Champions Season 4 -- Episode 195:  Gathering Against Cale; A Champion Falls
   Carla of the Golden Grail arrived along with the other champions and Albatross Zane ready for battle.
   Their leader -- Jede of the Cosmic Fire -- informed Billy "We shall take care of the android while you and Camerion start with the spell."
   "But Jede!" cried Billy. "I didn't think you'd trust me using this dark power."
   "We have no choice,"
   Aaron of the Silver Light walked toward him and replied "The soul of that fiend Laiyun lives inside you now. But... But we all trust that you will do whatever to save everyone and this planet."
   Billy turned to Jede and asked "You agree with this?"
   Jede gave a kind smile and responded "We all believe that you will make the correct decision."
   A smiling Relena shook her head and told Billy "Jede's right. You can do this, Bro. Just know that we are behind you one-hundred percent."
   Both Kody and Joey agreed by shaking their heads.
   "You're not weak Billy," Joey told him. "Otherwise Blaze wouldn't trust you with our lives. I trust you too, by the way."
   The champion in silver armor -- Aaron of the Silver Light -- took out his long broadsword and offered it to Billy.
   "If neither of us make it out of there," Aaron directed. "Do whatever to destroy that creature."
   The determined Billy grabbed the long weapon with his left hand as he shook his head.
   The caring Carla of the Golden Grail walked to Billy and told him "You be careful, no matter what."
   Then Billy shook his head again and he said "Just don't die."
   Kody of the Hard Rock told him "It will be alright. You leave Cale to us and focus on your part. Don't worry about us and relax for your mission."
   "Everyone!" cried a happy Billy. "Thank you all!"
   After he transformed into a Super Kainobi, Albatross faced forward as the other champions joined him.
   "Can we win against him?" Albatross asked.
   Jede informed him "Our only mission at the moment is to distract Cale while Billy and Camerion perform their spell which will hopefully close the portal."
   The form of Aaron's body quickly became more muscular as his eyes turned green. The color of his hair also changed gold as it spiked up. And golden energy began surrounding his body."
   "Are we ready?" asked Aaron.
   Jede of the Cosmic Fire shook his head with determination.
   And he directed his team "Let us confront the enemy while we give time to our friends."
   The champions and Albatross Zane all spotted the evil Cale near the dark clouds. And the team began their attack.
   Joey of the Energy Tree quickly fired a stream of his thin arrows from his energy bow as he whispered "Nature's Quill Barrage!"
   Desoto of the Black Shadow formed a circle to his mouth using his left hand. And he blew a barrage of small purple energy from his breath after yelling "Black Flamingo Fire!"
   Some sand gathered from the ground as Kody of the Hard Rock pointed his right finger above. He soon pointed his finger forward as the sand formed around him. Then the sand formed a small ball of orange energy to his finger. And Kody blew his projectile as he called out "Crescent Sphere!"
   The enemy Cale flew to the left side like a flash which made the three projectiles miss him.
   Carla of the Golden Grail formed a large ball of silver energy from her palms which was surrounded by blue light. And she blew her great attack as she yelled "Shirasagiutsu!"
   Aaron of the Silver Light gathered a globe of silver energy around each fist. He soon threw his fists forward and blew a barrage of small silver balls as he called out "Great Heaven's Wrath!"
   Albatross as a Super Kainobi spread his arms out and shot a stream of small balls that were made of yellow energy.
   "Lightning Release!" He called. "Crisis Meteorites!"
   A calm Rico of the Lake Kaires crossed his arms before him as a circle of green water emerged around him from the ground. He placed his palms forward and a large globe of green energy blew from the water.
   "Great Vortex Technique!"
   Relena of the Cosmic Fire blew a barrage of small pink fireballs from her palms as she yelled "Blooming Rose Petals!"
   Jede of the Cosmic Fire forms a diamond using both his hands. He soon blew long spears of black fire from his mouth. And the shape of each projectile had changed into a circle.
   "Breeding Chaos Scatter!"
   This storm of projectiles shot his chest. And Cale was blown through many trees at the other side of the forest.
   The team cheered until they discovered some of the dark clouds in the sky quickly formed into a large square.
   "Oh no!" cried Carla. "It's here!"
   "Da portal's openin'!" yelled Desoto.
   The color of the square became red and its light shined on the body of the wounded android. And Cale stood up as he felt the warmth of the dark energy.
   Cale grew long silver spikes from parts of his body as a red light glowed from the black stones placed on him. A pair of the spikes grew from his forehead as a smaller spike appeared on the top of his chin. A long black stone was also on his forehead. And long hair grew from the bottom of his head.
   After his transformation was completed, the new Cale floated into the air.
   "The dark portal," assessed Rico. "It had changed Cale somehow."
   First, Cale pointed his right point-finger at the shining Desoto of the Black Shadow. The android fired a small line of dark-red energy that had a small white cloud around it.
   "Magnet Release!" called Cale. "Cold Fire Technique!"
   Desoto was shot on his chest and he fell near both Billy and Camerion. Aaron of the Silver Light hurried to check on the cowboy.
   After that, an emotional Billy fell onto the grass.
   "Billy?" cried Camerion. "Are you alright?"
   Billy slowly lifted his head and stared at the wicked android.
   A tear suddenly fell from his eyes as Billy said "You'll be avenged, Desoto."
   Then Billy rose on his knees as he told Camerion "Let's do this. We need to close that portal now."
   "Got it," replied Camerion. "Let's deal with that portal."
   The two boys began to repeatedly chant the words "Polgoleszhunta, Rolgolas, Cosna."
   The portal began closing slowly as the vicious Cale gathered dark-red energy into his left hand. And he blew a large projectile at an unsuspecting Billy.
   Once he was hit, Billy had fallen to the arms of his friend Jede.
   Aaron quickly found him and screamed "Billy!"
   Jede grew shocked once Billy rose back up. The color of his eyes had become a gloomy black.
   "Great Zeus!" cried Jede. "Your eyes Billy!"
   Billy implied "I must have used a lot for that portal."
   The blond-haired champion soon found a cold Desoto laying with his face up on the ground. The body was returned to normal. And his blue eyes remained open.
   "Oh no, Desoto!" cried Jede.
   Camerion slowly stood up and yelled "Big Brother?"
   A sad Carla wrapped her arms around Relena as the woman in golden armor began to cry. Meanwhile, Kody grabbed him as a distraught Joey yelled in horror.
   Billy slowly walked away from Jede as he called in sadness "Desoto!"
   Suddenly, the black-eyed champion in blue armor floated into the air as a large black wind spiraled around him.
   "What is this?" asked Jede.
   Carla found a possessed Billy flying toward their enemy and she cried "No! Billy!"
   Aaron walked a few steps forward and responded "It's Laiyun's power. It has taken over Billy again."
   A sphere of black energy formed from his right hand as the angered Billy stared at the wicked Cale.
   "Desoto," Billy thought to himself. "I don't care what happens to me. But you will not leave us. Not without knowing this trash is dead."
   Once the black wave from his right hand faded, Billy aimed both his palms forward. And a barrage of large rings made of yellow energy blew from his hands to his target.
   "Rolgoles!" He shouted.
   Cale blew both his wrists forward in order to block every projectile thrown at him.
   "Storm Release!" called Billy. "Dead Circus Barrage!"
   Next, a large ring of purple energy formed from the hands of Billy. A barrage of purple beams began to fire from the energy ring as Billy shouted "Storm Release! Tormenting Chains of Odin!"
   A large plate of purple energy formed on the back of his right wrist which let Cale hit every projectile shot by the possessed champion away.
   Kody watched the great attack as he reported "This is from Storm Release, something Billy has never wield until now."
   "It's part of his Tao Magic!" claimed Aaron. "His anger for Desoto is controlling him right now! Billy has no idea what he's doing!"
   A numb Joey along with the other champions continued to oversee the clash between Billy and the newly-formed Cale until they all noticed a white light forming behind them.
   Joey quickly turned around and cried "Blaze?"
   "What?" called Kody.
   The others turned and spotted the white light shining around the body of their leader wearing golden armor.
   A calm Jede closed his eyes as the glow of the light grew wider.
   "What the hell is that?" cried Joey.
   A helpless Carla continued to hold her as Relena yelled "Jede?"
0 notes
inhuman-obey-me · 3 years ago
Text
Knowledge is Wrath
Word Count: 1.8k Description: The Avatar of Wrath had mastered the art of pleasantries and placid smiles, a mask he wears nearly perfectly -- but if you try and take advantage of him, he won't hesitate to let it fall. Part of the A Demon's Nature series. Hereeeeee's Satan and his glorious wrath!! Note: Cabariel is a high-ranking demon named in the Ars Theurgia who has fifty dukes attend to him in the day, and another fifty dukes attend to him at night. Thalbus is one of the named night dukes, who are said to be deceitful and disobedient. Can also be found on AO3 here. content warning: gore gore gore, blood, body mutilation/horror
The Avatar of Wrath had mastered the art of pleasantries and placid smiles, burying the rage that always burned under his skin deep within the darkest parts of his soul. He would be more than wrath, more than the fury that everyone expected of him. At least, that is what he would constantly tell himself, knowing that many still found themselves on edge in his presence. It’s all an act, some who had witnessed his true self would say, others merely repeating it for his title and position alone.
There was a place where those whispers would fade away, however. The company of high-society, where he had gathered an array of acquaintances with whom he could discuss a variety of subjects, sharing his extensive knowledge and exchanging it for theirs. These connections only ran so deep, most never crossing the line into friendship -- but friendship is not what Satan sought. He wanted status, a curated image that placed him firmly in the echelons of the wise and out of the shadows of rage incarnate, out of the shadow of pride.
“Thank you again, Lord Satan. I can’t believe I’ll actually be able to see this scroll for myself!” A lesser demon eagerly walked alongside the Avatar of Wrath, accompanying him through the gates of the Demon Lord’s Castle.
“It’s my pleasure, Thalbus.” Satan gave the other his ever-polite smile. “Cabariel had mentioned multiple times that you were anxious to get a look at it, so I’m glad I can be of assistance.” Here he was, leading one such acquaintance to the Royal Archives housed at the castle. It was a privilege few had, one that Satan treasured greatly. He had been allowed by Lord Diavolo centuries ago to visit the archives as much as he pleased, and he did not let the offer go to waste.
They descend now, traversing through the grand passages of the castle -- both imposing and eerie, some corridors shrouded in darkness while others are aglow with flames. Portraits watched them pass by, whispered -- ‘a new visitor, how quaint’. Upon reaching the door that housed the array of treasured documents and scrolls, Satan whispers an incantation he knows well, the last of the words leaving his lips and turning into a spark of light that traces the intricate pattern carved in stone. With a click, the door opens, and the two walk in -- the door then heavily shutting behind them.
“Here we are.” Satan gestures to the main archive room, lined with towering shelves that nearly reached the domed ceiling. “Impressive, isn’t it?”
“It is, it is!” Thalbus gives him a grin, ever-so-slightly crooked. Clasping his hands together, his eyes scan the magnificent annals of the Devildom. “So … where is that scroll?”
“Impatient, aren’t we?” Satan merely smiles, though he feels the way his jaw wants to clench. “Come, it’s in one of the back rooms.”
Down a few aisles, through an archway, and they now are before a vitrine with a scroll neatly rolled out in full display, the parchment delicate from its age but its fibers intact due to restorative magic. It’s much smaller than one would expect, and thick ink is scrawled across it in ancient demonic tongue -- “The Word of the Regent”.
“Wow,” Thalbus gasps in awe, scuttling closer to the glass to get a good look at the prized artifact. “So it really does exist … “
“That it does.” Ah, what a smug look it was that now graced the Avatar’s features. “It really is fascinating, apparently written by one of the first kings. Many are still trying to decipher it’s more complicated and muddled passages, as it seems to speak of a series of powerful rituals that would grant whoever is able to perform it a great amount of power and wealth. Or, so say the urban legends, the actual validity is still debated and -- “
Satan continues to speak, showing off every bit of knowledge he has on the subject as Thalbus continues to admire the scroll. He gets a few ‘hmms’ and various other one-word acknowledgments in response, which is all he needs to continue his confident rambling. To be in the presence of another demon who understood the splendor of such a relic was refreshing, even if for only selfish reasons in that the Greater Demon could bestow an interested party in all his wisdom.
“Thank you once again, Lord Satan.” Thalbus gestures in great respect, hiding a rather satisfied smile as they both eventually leave the archive chamber. “I am incredibly lucky to have been able to be introduced to you, and to see the scroll for myself! Ah, what a dream come true!”
“Again, you are very welcome.” Picture-perfect smile, a steady gaze. They round a few corners, go down a flight of steps -- the portraits whisper again, “oh my, oh my”. They enter one of the dim passages, steps lost to shadows.
“Um, Lord Satan … forgive me, but is this the way back out?” Thalbus warily speaks up, eyes darting around the dark.
“Oh, no. No, it isn’t.” Satan laughs, shaking his head as a large smile stays plastered on his lips. A fool, the Avatar thinks to himself, he truly takes ME for a fool! How ridiculous, preposterous, outrageous. “Did you think I wouldn’t notice, Thalbus?”
“Pardon me?”
“Adorable, how you think you can feign innocence.” He laughs again, though malice bleeds through his voice this time. With a wave of his hand, the shriek of metal scraping against stone is heard -- a gate closes, and Thalbus now realizes he is trapped in a room with no escape. “So, why don’t you hand it over?”
“Oh … you mean, this?” The lesser demon produces a thin tube from his jacket, cocky grin splitting his lips. “I suppose you’re sharper than I realized. Didn’t think you would pay attention while you kept yapping and yapping.” How courageous, for him to act as if he wasn’t moments away from wrathful consequences, Thalbus would have one think. How utterly foolish, is what Satan knows.
Imperturbable smile still present, the Greater Demon steps closer and moves to snatch the contained scroll from the thief, but Thalbus has decided he’d much rather opt for more severe torment as he moves to hide it again. Were all demons of deceit this imprudent? The flames of wrath begin to grow within -- hotter, deadlier.
“How about we make a deal?” Thalbus tries. “You let me borrow the scroll, and I’ll grant you something in return.”
“Oh?” Satan’s smile widens, but his teeth grow sharper. “A deal you say? Truly, Thalbus, you continue to impress!” He begins to laugh, that laugh that sounded so melodic and cheerful and yet just a hint deranged. Satan tilts his head to the side, his eyes glowing a fierce green in the darkness. “You think that you of all demons can entice me with a deal? Just what could you possibly have to offer ME?” His laughter continues, growing more maniacal as his body continues to shift and distort. His claws grow longer, his tail thrashing about as flesh gives way at parts to bone, green flames tracing up his spine to match the searing verdant flames that now emit from his hollow eye sockets. “Have you forgotten who I am?”
Thalbus does not have time to respond, though the terror now present on every crevice of his being is answer enough. In an instant, claws are at his throat as he is held up against the wall, the sound of metal hitting the stone floor ringing out as the scroll slips from his grasp and rolls into the far corner of the room.
“Ah, looks like you’ve lost your bargaining chip!” There is a distortion to Satan’s voice, a grating echo. “That’s too bad.” His tail goes to flick at Thalbus’ cheek before roughly moving against his flesh, its sharp edges peeling away at his skin to reveal what lay underneath. The lesser demon tries to shriek, only to find no sound leaves him. “What’s the matter, cat got your tongue?”
Satan laughs again, before the claws of his other hand immediately go to grip Thalbus’ jaw, wrenching it open and piercing a claw through his aforementioned muscle. “Oh, guess it’s actually me.” As the lesser demon struggles, Satan can make out a garbled “Please!” as he sees tears leave the other’s eyes.
Please?
PLEASE?
What could this pathetic excuse of a demon, this wretch, this absolute shitstain be thinking that begging “please” would help get him out of this? This situation that he only had himself to blame, for daring to think that he could outwit Satan. The flames that danced atop wrath’s form grew brighter, hotter, larger -- and he unhooks his claw from the demon's tongue to instead grab hold of his jaw once more and rip it clean off his skull. Blood gurgles up and spills from the deceitful demon’s open cavity of a throat, muffling his continued screams which only sounded like music to Wrath’s ears.
Rage overflowed through every fiber of Satan’s being, his mind now clouded and his vision blurred among the inferno. His blood boils as he descends into madness, a flurry of demonic curses escaping through grotesque fangs until words become unintelligible screams that shake the stone walls in his fury.
Idiot, idiot, idiot, IDIOT!
The sharp bony horn that now protrudes from Wrath’s forehead is lowered to skewer an eye, then the other. Piece by piece, Thalbus is torn apart -- claws ripping apart limbs, teeth tearing out his organs, horn impaling muscle, tail grinding bone -- all while the smell of burnt flesh fills the room as flames lick at the remains. The sickening sounds of the lesser demon’s body being completely obliterated fill the otherwise empty chamber, a song of violence.
He is long dead before Satan is finished with him, painting the walls and floor with ichor and tissue and ashes of whatever else comprised the once corporeal form of Cabariel’s duke.
Ah, right. Cabariel …
Deep breath, count to ten … and Satan feels his form shift again, sharp edges folding away as his more human form comes into place. The haze in his mind is gone, the flames put out, the wrath forcibly buried back down as rage subsides. He is himself again, he thinks, for obviously this was who he was and not that beast that had just reared its head.
Yes. Himself.
He walks over to the corner of the room, deftly picking up the nearly stolen artifact. Rage begins to unfurl within him once more, but he must keep it at bay. This problem had been taken care of, disaster avoided. Cabariel would not be pleased to know that he was short a duke, but that was the least of Satan’s worries -- after all, Cabariel should be glad that it wasn’t his throat Satan came for next.
Another look around the room, and a tired sigh leaves the Avatar’s lips. He had purposely lured Thalbus away from the Royal Archives, but still ...
… Barbatos was not going to be pleased.
248 notes · View notes
doctorslippery · 4 years ago
Link
The Pillar of First Blood – A 15ft dark stone pillar that has engraved writing on each side ‘The spot where the first blood was split between a batch of common devils”.
The Drawing Moss – A smooth stone with a bunch of growing moss on it. Touching the stone with a bare hand results in the moss slowing moving to wherever was touched. On the stone are several handprints and doodles perfectly covered over with the moss.
Curci’s Crypt – A small white stone structure deep in the woods with carvings of trees on each side. Entering brings you into the hidden crypt of Curci.
The Crumbling Shack – Far away from any civilization lays what once was a small shack. The windows are broken, some walls have crumbled away, and parts of the roof are open and fallen in.
Trio of Faces – On the side of a rocky cliff are a well carved trio of protruding faces all looking the same direction
Cone Shaped Prison – In the middle of a grassy field stands an 8ft slim cone made of iron bars, in the middle of the structure lies a sun-bleached skeleton bound in iron shackles.
The Tree of Sacrifice – A abnormally large and oddly pale brown tree where the branches are twisted, and the leaves are a sickly saturated green color. At the base of the tree lies a blood stained alter that the roots of the tree have grown around it and now hold it in place. The base of the tree as well as the ground around the alter are permanently stained a deep red. If the tree is cut, a thick blood sap seeps out of wound. If a creature is sacrificed on the alter, the blood pools near where the roots touch the alter and are absorbed while what appear to be veins appear on the tree that go up into the branches.
The Bone Pit – In an open field there is a 10ft wide and 50ft deep pit with no life growing around it. The walls of this chasm are lined with dark cobblestone and going down there are three uneven sized holes that are covered by iron bars. At the bottom there are a large pile of bones.
The Odd Stone Slab – A big square stone slab rests hidden near the side of the road. Carved into the slab is a symbol and a riddle that upon answering correctly leads to a small dungeon.
The Copper Fox – A 4ft oxidized copper statute of a fox with a small locked box in its mouth and two ruby eyes.
The Pointing Eagle – On top of a large rock formation is a big iron statue of an eagle pointing its body to the east.
The Feasting Table – Out away from any kind of civilization sits a large gray solid stone table with ancient carvings on the sides. Upon its surface are newly lit candles and a banquet of food that seems to be warm, fresh, and untouched by its surroundings. If one where to eat or take anything from the table, the next day it would be completely restocked and replenished.
The Jeweled Bush – A seemingly average looking berry bush that happens to grow small jewels instead of berries. If one where to try and consume one of the jewels picked off of the bush within 24hrs, that person gains a temporary magical effect or bonus, otherwise it’s a normal jewel.
The Ice Blood Spot – Located on the cliff face of a large mound of ice there is one spot that is dark red instead of the pure blue that surrounds it.
Dragon’s Graveyard – in a valley, there are 8-10 adult dragon skeletons, half-buried.
Petunia, the Land Whale – A large whale skeleton surrounded by petunias. The whale is miles away from the sea and the petunias aren’t native to this location.
Wondrous Obelisk – an obelisk, comprised of rose quartz and decorated with sylvan runes, appears to be of fey origin. it is surrounded in a 120-foot field of wild magic.
The Old Folk Hero – A half erected statue of an old folk hero. Either under construction or half crumbled.
The Hope Tree – It’s an oak tree with the word hope carved into it in large letters. No one knows who did it or why, but it’s turned into a useful landmark for the local village.
The Moon’s Egg – It’s a massive dome-like stone formation that shines pearlescent in the moonlight. It lays in a bare outcropping of rock and is warm to the touch.
Hollering Pit – A 50ft deep sinkhole. Well-hidden at the bottom is the lair of an accomplished burglar who calls himself the Jeweler. He’s too old to do much in the way of harm, but the countless traps he installed are not.
The Painted Cliff Face – A cliff that has been entirely covered in paint from hundreds of people.
Threeshades Tower- A weathered, ivy-mantled square tower atop a small hill. Has three levels, and each is built from a different kind of stone. The longsword stuck in one of the bricks on the top level is +1 and can project the bearer’s voice up to 50’ away.
Pigeons’ Chest – an ornate, but empty, chest of silver and pearl sitting by the road. It will not move by any means yet discovered, material nor magical.
The Ol’ Inn – The ancient ruins of a strangely ‘modern-looking’ tavern located in the deepest patches of forest. No path leads to it, no other buildings or ruins are found besides it, but dozens of deformed footsteps can be found heading out of the site. At night, the faint, muffled sound of a single viol can be heard coming out of the muddy floor.
The Forgotten Emperor’s Statue – An incredibly detailed, broken bust of a young wood elf, bearing a red crown. Its nose and left ear are missing and where its left eye should be, the socket is destroyed, and a monstrously decomposed snake eye can be found. The base has a bronze plaque which reads (in broken Celestial): ‘The only one truly meant to rule’, followed by a name which seems scratched out.
The Candle Trees – deep in the woods, a small group of trees whose leaves are bright red. They contrast starkly with the normal trees around them. The Candle trees appear otherwise normal, but the dried leaves can be brewed into a tea that warms the bones even on the coldest nights.
Tale of a Desert’s Origin – A granite obelisk in the desert with glyphs on it. It seems to tell the tale of a very powerful magic user stealing all the life from this area, killing all the plants and turning it into a desert.
The Waning Waterfall – a small waterfall that appears to reverse direction on every night with a bright full moon, running up instead of down.
The Sandmount – There’s a strange dune of sand in the middle of this grassy field, covered in scorpions.
The Awoken Stones – three stone pillars at the top of a hill, each engraved with a different rune of no known language. The pillars appear to change positions, but how this is done is unknown.
Ghost village – There’s a half-buried village in the sand, with sandstone walls being the only remnants… except for one house, which has a simple roof and door carved into the stone.
Impossible Shipwreck – Dashed upon the rocks are the remains of a large merchant ship. Weathered and ancient, the skeletons of the crew still scattered around though most everything of value has long since been looted. The most peculiar thing about this is that the rocks, and ship, are in a cavern 100ft underground, miles from the nearest navigable waters.
Sapphire Beach – a small stretch of coastline hidden between two nigh-inaccessible cliff faces. The sand is particularly fine and a brilliant blue. Rumor has it that the sand was formed when giants destroyed the jewel horde of a local dragon. There are also rumors of a dragon being sighted in the oceans nearby. Digging deep into the sands turn up giant bones.
The Lovers’ Spring – a secluded hot spring, with the initials of many young lovers carved into nearby rocks. Discarded and forgotten undergarments can be found on tree branches in the area.
The Arms of the Last Bard – A broken but thick 15ft wide half-circle embedded to the ground made of quartz and intricately laced with gold strips. An assortment of precious gems are embedded in its surface. Any attempt to collect and/or destroy this construct will cause severe psychic damage and a loud high-pitched tone to play loudly. The half-circle aligns perfectly with sunset/sunrise and every time it does, the most beautiful flute melody plays that is sourceless.
The Iron Tree – A big, old tree which seems to be made of iron, but as far as anyone can tell, is alive and growing, if slowly.
Hades’ Hand – A 15ft tall stone hand stretches from the ground, reaching for the sky.
The Stone Toad – A gigantic stone carving of a toad’s head, crumbling, half-buried, and covered in moss.
The Wrecked Ship – The sun-bleached wreckage of a ship that ran aground long ago. Inside the hull is a massive cage with thick steel bars that appear to have been smashed outward from the inside.
The Three-Sided Tower – A half-collapsed stone tower with curious triangular architecture. The bones of a lonely watchman sitting in a chair lie atop it. The watchman wears a helmet shaped like a triangular pyramid. Several towers of this type can be found around the same area.
Giant’s Playground – this field is entirely stone, and many massive footprints can be seen stomped into it. There are boulders laying around, some cracked.
The Fallen Hero – The legs of a giant metal statue standing beside the top of a waterfall overlooking the valley below. At the bottom of the lake below the falls, the head and torso can be found. It appears to be the likeness of a famous ancient hero that a PC might recognize.
The Charity Cave – A cave with a chest that says, ‘if you take something, leave something.’ It’s unlocked and has several trinkets inside.
The Eye of the Moon – on top of this hill is a pool surrounded with stone. The water is always cool, and at night the full moon can always be seen in its reflection, regardless of clouds or moon cycle.
Bigfoot – A large tree in the forest that bends and splits in such a way that the bottom looks like a foot, with toes.
Goddess of Death Statue – A worn smooth but still recognizable ancient statue of a goddess of death. At her feet sets a black stone bowl filled with fresh rose petals. If you were to kneel down at the bowl and look up at her, you would see her eyes stare unwaveringly into yours.
The Red Altar – in the middle of a copse in a strange swamp lies a smooth altar made of red stone, with strange carvings of trees and water all around its base. Upon touching the altar, you will hear a voice in your mind ‘sacrifice”, and you will feel a strange primal urge to sacrifice a creature on top of it.
Timnar’s Beard – A copse of trees growing in a single spot on an otherwise barren mountain. Unbeknownst to the world, it is the burial place of a great wizard of earthen magics. It is watched over by a trio of stone golems and a handful of slumbering treants to guard the immense knowledge held within the tomb.
The Sundered Mount – a mountain that appears to have been cleaved in two and creating two crumbling peaks with a narrow cut of a valley between them. It does not appear naturally created.
The Mage Wastes – A region where fertile grassland suddenly stops and abruptly becomes a barren wasteland of decaying grass and reddish soil. It seems as if it was the sight of some magical battle. The ground is pocked with craters and scorch marks, yet it seems as if this battle was an ancient long finished, but the battlefield has remained a wasteland frozen in time.
The Dragons Maw – A series of jutting tooth like spires of black igneous rock which rise out from the sea. These “teeth” have proven to be an extreme hazard to sailors and shipping which pass too near to them. Tearing hulls and ripping sails.
The Gods Sacrament Statue -A old weathered statue of a god with beautiful gems inlaid and surrounded with wicker basket offerings of gold, flowers, food, and trinkets. Stealing from the statue result in a curse (permanent level of exhaustion) from the deity until either greater restoration is cast on the thief or they repent and make an offering of twice the amount stolen. Award inspiration for respectful offerings or prayers given to the statue.
The Dragonblood – A massive artwork carved into a boulder placed some ways away from the banks of a nearby river. The artwork seems to depict a struggle between giants and dragons, with the giants as the victors. The faintly red runes which line it are giantish, and anyone who can decipher them will read that it marks a momentous battle between giants and dragons, over which should decide the course of the river.
The Daughter of the Sun – An enormous stone of a singular soft yellow color. It is hot to the touch but by day it is warm and comfortable simply standing near it. By night however the stone begins to glow brightly, illuminating its surroundings in radiant golden light. Large chips of the same stone can be found in the foliage growing around it. With similar glowing properties.
Would you kindly -A sentient door in the side of a mountain that has short term memory loss. He has no idea of his name or how to open himself but enjoys talking with travelers none the less. Speaking the magic word “please” will cause the door to open revealing a shortcut through the mountain. No form of magic or otherwise can lead through or get around this door without speaking the magic word due to an ancient magical barrier.
The Bread Boy – a small statue in a park depicting a street urchin. In one hand he has what is left of a small loaf of bread. With the other hand he is spreading crumbs for the birds, so they do not go hungry too. A place where the street kids gather.
Sculpture Garden – a small clearing in a forest, near a cave mouth, contains dozens of statues of humanoid creatures, many armed & armored, all with looks of surprise & horror on their stone faces.
Saben’s Cauldron – a large, circular pool off of a main river which is geothermally heated.
The Teeth – a series of vaguely conic stone spires lined up along a gentle arc. Each is over 15ft tall and 5ft across at the base, and tapers to a narrow tip. Nobody knows the origin of this formation. Some say the teeth are all that remains from some colossal dragon skeleton, others think the stones were placed there by a dragon cult, or as a sign from Bahamut.
Mage-Crater – a 120ft diameter crater. Now filled with water and inhabited by pond creatures.
The Old Man – a natural rock formation that just happens to look like the face of an old man with a long beard. Ruins of temples from several ancient civilizations can be found in the valley below, apparently attracted there to worship the face, or perhaps just to be under his watchful gaze. Most humanoid races in the region are sure the old man looks like their race and have their own legend about him.
The Deino Flats -roughly 40 acres of salt flats. A long dried up saltwater marsh from ancient times.
Grand Defender – a large, symmetrical hill where the site of a great battle once was. Stone rubble and ruins barely peaks out from the top. Flowers are left there every so often.
The Adventurers Billiard Hall – A stone statue of a Local adventurer rests on a green glass dome in the center of a public lake. The dome is lit gently from beneath. Somewhere nearby lies a dilapidated entrance which runs through a small puzzle focused dungeon.
Turned-Inn – An inn that has been carefully constructed to appear as if it was turned upside-down.
The Signposts – A collection of several dozen poles each with a dozen or more signs mounted to them pointing towards various distant lands, nearby businesses, and bizarre joke locations. It started with travelers who erected a signpost pointing to their distant homelands which other travelers added to. Eventually it got out of hand.
Worm’s Desert – A small sandy desert only a couple hundred acres in size of so. A great desert-making worm arrived from another world and sought to covert the world into an ecosystem like its home but caught a local disease it was unresistant to and died before it made much progress. The residual poison from the worm’s body deters plants from overtaking the sand.
Lightning Lab – A bizarre building with a strange mushroom-shaped metal lattice on top. It was the lab of a researcher studying non-magical electricity who died from electrocution.
The Sandlot – A square of property with no building where children come to play. A greedy landlord raised the rent on a long-term elderly tenant when they purchased the property, driving the tenant into poverty and eventually death. The tenant cursed the land with dying breath that no-one would never profit from the property. Every future tenant was driven out by terrifying haunts, and eventually the building was burned down.
Dwarven Monument – An enormous high relief of six dwarven warriors cut from a cliff pointing the way along, commemorating their epic journey.
Atlas Boulders A series of differently sized large stone spheres far too large for a man to lift. The strongest giants would lift them to prove their strength. They sometimes move, so perhaps the giants still use them.
Ancient Battlefield – ramparts, high hills, and trenches filled with water that stretch for mile marking the location an ancient battlefield. It has grown over.
The Epicenter – A large swath of woods where all the trees in a massive circle have been bent at a 90-degree angle towards the center but continue to grow that way. There is nothing (currently) anomalous at the center, but a powerful coven of druids hold it as one of their holiest places and guards it closely.
Ol Demons Place – a once portal to the abyss, sealed by hero’s long ago, now just a crumbling arch with an unsettling aura.
The Broken Hill – a hill that you need to walk uphill to get to and walk uphill to get away from.
The Rooster of Mourning – An enormous statue of a rooster, made from a strange metal, finely detailed and colored. It is hollow, and when the first ray of sunrise strikes it, a great, sad-sounding crow arises from it. Legend says that it commemorates a great battle in the distant past.
The Angry Spot – a small stone platform on the top of a hill, standing on the platform makes a person irrationally angry. Barbarians may involuntarily rage as a result.
The Alter of a Thousand Arms. – At a crossroads sits an unusual statue, made of stone it stands over 10 feet tall and has arms sticking out in every direction with their palm turned upwards. In nearly every hand there is a candle, some still lit but most are fully melted. Placing a candle in one of the hands and lighting it will give the player the blessing of ‘A helping hand.’ When a player next fails a roll, they may roll an additional d6 and add it to their total.
The Weeping Sister – A fifteen-foot statue of a girl unmarred by time. Next to her are the shattered remains of another statue, close enough that the body may have once held her outstretched hand. The feet of this larger statue are all that remain affixed to the earth – the rest is scattered throughout the clearing. Water, clean and pure, travels down her face in steady rivulets but leaves no erosion there.
The Sensible Stone Head -a large stone head protruding from the surface of a glacier. It is the head of an earth elemental and if you get his attention, he is friendly. If asked what he is doing their he replies ”swimming in the river”, given he exists at a geological place the slow flow of the glacier is like a river to him.
Glass Tree – A fairly tall an elaborate tree made entirely out of glass raises from the earth, at its base there is a plaque written in dwarven, it’s to commemorate a dwarf leader who fell in battle.
The Titan’s Blade – A 50 ft rust covered sword driven into the earth. The whole area has a magical aura and no wildlife lingers within a quarter mile of the sword.
The Well of Good Tidings – A well by the side of the road that is a base in a local hafling tradition that if one where to lose a tooth, that it is to be tossed in the well with a tip of the hat. When doing so, good fortune is sure to come. Characters that throw in teeth later find small amounts of wet coins in various locations on their person. Characters that throw rubbish, or are otherwise disrespectful of the well, find their respective objects on their person once more soaking wet and covered in bite marks.
Skilltown – A small but clearly once-bustling town lays abandoned inside of a titan’s skull. The skull is half buried in the sand; its eye sockets and mouth aim up at an angle. Walking through its mouth is the only way to enter the town. The skull looks to be that of an enormous version of whatever scariest creature lives in that area. It provides ample shade during most of the day.
Best Rest Graveyard – A cleric once prayed over a graveyard that all within would ‘rest well.’ Now anyone who falls asleep in that graveyard has the best night of sleep they’ve ever had.
Bird Hill – a grassy hill of noticeable height rises from the otherwise flat plains. On the hill are several lines of cobblestone that do not grow grass and have no discernible pattern from the surface. If flying, however, you see the cobblestone lines form the shape of a bird, along with some arcane symbols. If you happen to look up during the spring or fall, you’ll see migratory birds alter their course to fly over this hill.
Stairway to Nowhere – All that remains of an ancient fortress, the remarkably well constructed staircase rises for 3 stories out of the ground at the end of an ancient road, and then just abruptly stops.
The Crossroads – This is the place where four kingdoms meet. The main road for each lead to a massive stone pillar. Many years ago, all four kingdoms were at war, and a pillar was placed there as a symbol that none from neighboring kingdoms would be allowed to cross. It is now an annual meeting place for the four to discuss their continued amnesty.
Cloudland Canyon – It’s a canyon nestled in a northern mountain range that’s so high even the base of the canyon is a higher elevation than most of the other mountains in this world. Wondrously magical things occur here.
Stone Tree Garden – It was a garden from a former ancient culture, which vanished out of unknown reasons. One of the only things found was this tree garden. Are the trees made of stone or turned to, no one knows.
‘The Circle’ -There once was a meteorite which crashed into the land. The first to arrive found weird writing in a (Insert required size) diameter circle. No one could read what was written. In the center of the circle, where the meteor should have been, there was nothing, not even a small crater.
The Well – A seemingly normal well on the top of a hill. Anything that is placed into it is immediately tossed out of it.
The Pariah’s Mountain -One mountain among an otherwise unimpressive range, its only defining feature is its completely upside down. The base measures about 60ft across, but the peak 3,000ft up is easily a mile across. Stairs may have been carved into the side, but the climb down to the summit (or is it up to the base? The locals aren’t quite sure) is precarious at times. The locals are also similarly vague when asked about what’s on top…
Worried stones – A group of 3 standing stones with anxiety. When encountered in their clearing, they will disappear once all eyes are off them. Careful inspection will reveal them to hiding nearby – peeking from behind a nearby tree, bottom of a lake, hidden by bushes, behind where the party is now looking, etc. If discovered, they disappear again if not observed. The stones are not malicious, and do not harm the party. They would just rather you all left them to it, thank you.
The Quiet Creek – An otherwise ordinary creek that runs through a forest. It is abnormally quiet near the stream, in such that there is almost no echo around it, and it is surprisingly hard to hear from a distance. All along its course stand small boulders, almost fully grown over with moss.
The Shifting Hills – A large field of hills, dotted with rocks, grasses, and flowers. Careful study has found the hills are constantly moving, as though old creatures crawl along under a carpet of earth. Magics which call upon the earth always seem to produce unexpected results when among them.
The Devil’s Wager – A large disc shaped stone at the base of a long dormant volcano. Visitors toss a copper at it for good luck. There are a couple hundred copper around it. It is considered extraordinarily bad luck to take the coppers.
The Swordleaf Trees – there is a patch of trees here with a non-stop turbulent wind rustling the leaves and branches violently. The leaves’ edges appear to be razor sharp.
Beacon Mountain – A mountain that, on some nights, has a bright ball of light form over it which slowly dissipates over several hours. Local religion strictly forbids climbing the mountain.
Mist Valley – a short pathway of stone carved into a mountain, roughly five feet wide with names of couples and graffiti on the stone walls. The pathway always has a thick fog settled over it, making it seem eerie.
Ancient Battleground – Deep in a forest, trees are marred with years old axe and sword marks. Hundreds of skeletons dressed in rusted armor and weapons lie in this area. Taking a trinket, or even loitering may be unwise.
True Clarity Bridge – A bridge between two high places that, for many people, while staring off the side, provides answers for their most troubling issue or deep question, whether they were looking for the answer or not.
Lover’s Glade – Two sequoia trees whose bases are over a hundred feet apart have grown together and connect about 160 to 180 feet off the ground. The branches and leaves of these giant trees create a pleasantly shaded area below which is often used by the local populace as sites of wedding ceremonies.
Round Rock – A mysterious perfectly round rock that stands nearly 20ft tall. It is too heavy to roll and never seems to chip. It is the center of many local legends, varying wildly on their truthfulness.
479 notes · View notes
chokemeanakin · 4 years ago
Text
Misunderstandings - Anakin x fem Reader (angst +fluff)
Tumblr media
Masterlist
Thank you for the request @artiza-n ! 💕
Wc: 6.4k
Summary: Anakin and reader get sent to Naboo to guard Padme and Clovis during a debate and some misunderstandings ensue. Mostly jealous angst, some fluff at the end— happy ending bc we all need that right now.
Tumblr media
Gif from @swprequels​
“I still don’t understand why they need both of us,” you grumble, rubbing sleep out of your eyes as you walk out of the cruiser. The day is hot on Naboo, but grey and cloudy with a promise of rain later. The humidity makes your skin sticky, worsening your irritation.
“Think of it as a vacation,” Anakin pulls the luggage from the transport cubby, setting it on the ground beside him. “You watch over Clovis, and I’ll handle Padme. It should be a breeze.”
“Exactly. Which is why I don’t understand why they need both of us.”
You had just gotten back from a long and grueling siege on Pontoon, another one of those vast, endless desert planets in the Outer Rims. You’d really much rather be sitting in front of an air cooler right now, resting your tired bones and trying to forget the taste of sand.
“These are two very important Senators, Y/n,” Anakin waved off your attempt to help him with the luggage. “If anything happens to them at this debate, the Senate will lose important advocates for peace and the end of this war.”
You knew this, of course you did. Not that you’d completely agree with his statement-- Clovis always seemed a little shady to you, his morals seemingly scattered all over the place. You guessed that’s why the Council sent you, a simple marksman, to guard Clovis while the beloved freedom-fighter Padme Amidala got the most powerful Jedi to ever exist. 
“Besides,” said Jedi nudged you, lips curling into a teasing smile. “Don’t you want to spend time with me?”
Of course you do. Between the war and separate guild or Council missions you’d both been sent on, neither of you had time to even breathe in the others’ direction for months. The only reason the Council was able to wrangle you onto this cruiser was because Anakin was going to be there. Not that you’d even be able to spend much time with him during the day, although you were aware that you’d be sharing a room in between the Senators you’d be protecting at night…
You and Anakin meet the Senators at the hull of the ship. They walk down the ramp side by side, heads held high and hands clasped in front of them. Their movements are smooth, like they’re gliding on water, and the heat doesn’t seem to bother either of them.
“Master Skywalker. Y/n. Thank you so much for being here, it is so courageous of the both of you to be looking out for us,” Padme stands before you, beautiful as ever in one of her many extravagant, expensive gowns. The headpiece woven through her hair sparkles in the midday light, the warmth of her eyes capturing the rays of the brilliant sun. “However, I must say that I hope your services are not needed. I’d much rather this debate go by smoothly than have any dangerous interruptions.”
“I can assure you, we’ll take care of any problems before they arrive. Leave the dirty work up to us,” Anakin returns her smile, charming as ever. 
Anakin shoots you a glance and then follows her away, carrying multiple bags of luggage in each arm as Padme shows him where to put it. For such a small woman, she seemed to pack heavy. Unfortunately, this leaves you and Clovis to stand alone together, an awkward stillness settling before you.
“Um, Anakin has your luggage,” you yawn into your arm, gesturing to his receding form with the other. “I’m Y/n, and I’ll be your bodyguard for this debate.”
“You?” Clovis doesn’t smile, instead he scans you up and down with hawkish eyes. “You’re such a small thing. What could you possibly be able to do to protect me?”
It’s not said unkindly, but it still irks you. Your eyes narrow and you bite back a nasty retaliation for the sake of diplomacy. “You’ll find I’m pretty good with a blaster. The best, actually, according to the Jedi Council. That’s why they have me work with the Generals in the war.”
“Are you a General yourself?” Clovis begins to walk, heading toward the senate building. You follow at his side.
“Not exactly. They offered me the title, but I declined. I’m more of a freelancer, and once the war ends, I’ll go back to taking odd jobs. Besides, there’s no use in having an army if I don’t know what to do with it.”
“Humble. That’s admirable,” Clovis’s mouth tilts into something of a smile. “I, myself, could never turn down an army. Or the status, for that matter. You could be holding a lot of power if you pushed your way with the Jedi Council, you know.”
“My way?” you questioned. “I just told you, I don’t have a way--”
“And that’s your flaw,” he mused, chin still pointed up, never quite looking at you. “How curious-- your Jedi counterpart seems to have stolen all the ambition.” 
You roll your eyes. You never had a thirst for power, or status, or influence, or any of that. Your power came from behind a blaster, when your focus was trained on a single target and your finger was glued to the trigger. One simple twitch of a muscle, and you could end a life from miles away. That was your power, and it was all you needed.
He is right about Anakin, you have to admit. He was always looking to be better, not just for himself, but for the good of others. You love that about it, in fact it’s one of your favorite qualities about him. Sometimes, though, you wished he could see that he didn’t have to try so hard all the time to believe he was enough.
The blast of cold air that hits you as you enter the senate building wrenches you out of your thoughts. It whisks away the perspiration that had built up on your skin, cooling your body and calming your mood almost magically. The sounds of your collective footsteps tap along the glossy marble floor, echoing throughout the empty chamber.
“Aren’t you going to ask what we’re doing here?” Clovis leans against his podium, marked with a nametag spelling his name. Next to him is your seat, and on Clovis’s other side is Padme, followed by Anakin on the end. A cold dread fills your veins, just now realizing how boring tonight’s debate is going to be.
You sigh inwardly, tracing the engravings of your nametag with the tip of your finger. “My job isn’t to ask questions, it’s to observe.” 
“Well, observe away,” he pushes himself off the podium. “Although I don’t think it will be very entertaining.”
He’s right. You sit in your seat, legs crossed on top of your podium as you inspect your nails. It’s been three hours since you’ve arrived, the sun is setting, and all Clovis has done is stroll around the debate room, muttering to himself and pondering through his position. You’re bored out of your mind. Pulling out your holocom, you wonder if Anakin’s situation is any better.
“Y/n?” he picks up a long moment after you send the call, and his face projects blue before you. It’s loud where he is, and his eyes are looking at something else.
“Where are you?” you question. He sounds like he’s a party, but you know that can’t be true. “Where’s Padme?”
“She’s with me,” Anakin tilts his head, signalling that she’s sitting in front of him. “We’re at a restaurant getting dinner. I was just going to ask-- did you and Clovis go somewhere to eat yet?”
You drop your legs from the podium and lean in close to the com, speaking quiet so Clovis can’t hear. “No, he’s barely said a word to me since we got here. He’s been walking around the debate room all afternoon, just talking to himself.”
“You think he’s nervous for tonight?”
“Maybe,” you spare a glance at him. He’s staring at the domed ceiling, as if he’s counting the pillars coming out of it. “Or maybe he’s just psycho.”
“Oh, Clovis knows what he’s doing,” a femine voice interjects. Anakin’s eyes shoot forward again, immediately smiling as Padme speaks. “His pre-debate ritual is long and gruelling-- I should have warned you. He’s simply getting into his headspace, that’s all.”
“How long does it usually take?” you mumble.
“It shouldn’t be much longer. Make sure he eats beforehand, otherwise he’ll be crabby during the debate. And trust me, you don’t want to have to handle a crabby Clovis.”
Both Padme and Anakin laugh at this, and you force yourself to smile along. “Yeah, I’ll go see what he’s up to now.”
“Good,” Anakin says, momentarily drowned out by an uproar of cheers behind him. “We should get going, too. Padme needs to get dressed for the debate. See you soon.”
Anakin ends the call, and you’re left wondering how exactly the topic of dressing Padme came up. 
Shoving down your irritation and self-pity, you pocket your com and stand from your seat. Clovis’s head whips toward you like you had pulled a blaster on him.
“What?”
“It’s getting late,” you stretch your arms over your head, working out the kinks and aches from sitting so long. “I was wondering if you were hungry at all.”
“I can’t eat before a debate,” Clovis looks almost angry for a second, and then he glances down at his watch. His expression smooths into one of urgency. “Ah, we should head to the apartments. It’s time to get ready.”
The night is still warm, and the sidewalk drips with a rainstorm that you missed while you were in the senate building. The fresh air is nice, though, and you breathe in the smell of sweet flowers and savory restaurant food. The grumble in your stomach is hard to ignore, but you know you’ll manage.
Clovis leads you all the way to his suite, the temporary apartment that sits in conjunction with yours and Anakin’s, and Padme’s on the other side. Staying in this apartment complex made more sense rather than finding separate housing units, as keeping everyone together would aid in ensuring their safety.
Padme’s mansion would have been a nice stay, you think, but these apartment sweets are also quite luxurious. You walk into the master bedroom to find a formal, dark blue gown laid out for you on the bed. Next to it is a rumpled space where you assume Anakin’s suit had been, but instead there’s a note and a box.
Padme wanted to get to the senate building early, so we’re probably going to just miss you. Too bad, I won’t get to help you into this sexy blue dress. Maybe I can help you out of it later.
You laugh softly, smoothing your thumb over the inked-on smiley face before finishing the note.
I’m not sure if you had time to get anything to eat, so I got you something while we were out. See you soon.
A
You don’t need an “I love you” scrawled into the paper in order to know he wanted to add it. That would have been too risky, and there was no way you’d be able to make an excuse if anyone were to find it. Still, you rip up the note and throw it in the trash before opening the box underneath. Your nose is instantly filled with the smell of food, still warm, and you sit next to the blue dress, digging in unceremoniously.
You scarf down as much of the food as you can and then store the rest in the fridge before getting to work on making yourself presentable. You have to look put together, yet not so much that you stand out. You slip a couple of silver clasps into your hair and do your makeup, opting for a bold lip color because you don’t have much time to do anything fancy with your eyes. You’re running short on time-- you know this because of the knock on your door, and then the irritated sound of Clovis:
“Y/n, we have to leave now or we’re going to be late. You know how bad it would be to arrive late to this event?”
You stand in front of the mirror, desperately reaching behind you to grasp at the zipper of your dress. It would be so much easier if Anakin was here to reach it for you, but you make due and quickly pull it up. The dress is form-fitting and flows down into a puddle around your feet. A bit long, as you opted not to wear heels in case something went awry, so you bunch the skirt up in your fists and jog to the door.
“My apologies,” you open the door to find Clovis, now dressed in a pristine black and white suit with his hair gelled back. “I was making sure I had my equipment all in order.”
Clovis ignores your excuse, eyes instantly moving to take in your figure. You could swear they blow open wide for a fraction of a second before he composes himself, clearing his throat and masking his approval with his usual grim expression.
“You clean up quite elegantly. Now, we should head to the lobby, the limousine is waiting for us.”
You’re not sure what the point of a limousine is, as the walk from the apartment buildings to the senate building is 10 minutes tops. Probably for formalities, you decide, as Clovis helps you out of the vehicle. The building that had been vacant only a couple hours earlier is now swarming with Senators, all dressed in lavish, extravagant gowns. Everyone is holding a flute of some sort of drink, and they congregate in small groups, making small talk before the debate starts. 
Clovis wastes no time with socializing, and beelines for his seat.
You hang back, searching the crowd for Anakin. Without heels, many people tower over you and it’s hard to focus with the deafening sound of chatter filling your ears. But you’re trained for this, have spent your whole life blocking out the unnecessary, so you hone into your patience and scan the crowd closer. 
There.
You’d recognize that head of golden-brown curls anywhere, even if it was tamed down for this event. He’s standing tall among the Senators, eyes gleaming bright as he engages a whole crowd of them in some wily story. He and Padme look at each other and laugh, his hand on her shoulder and her hand finding his waist. Your blood suddenly turns hot, and you push your way through the crowd to make it to them.
If you could, you would march right up and pull him away from all those greedy stares. They’re practically drooling all over him, and Padme’s hand is still on his waist. But you know better-- you can’t let anyone know you and Anakin are familiar, so you stand at the edge of the crowd, meeting Anakin’s eye.
You glare at his face, then at Padme’s hand, then back to him. His eyes narrow into a warning, extremely fleeting, and then he continues on charming the crowd. You know what he wanted to say-- it means nothing. It doesn’t stop the heat from blossoming in the pit of your stomach, the irritated glare you shoot Padme before looking down.
Way to stay under the radar, you think, slipping away from the crowd and deciding it’s better to keep your eyes on Clovis than get angry over a move on your boyfriend that was probably innocent. 
Clovis is sitting at his seat, still as stone, surveying the crowd before him.
“You nervous?” you take your seat beside him.
“Not at all.”
“Good. You’ve been preparing all afternoon, I think it’d be ridiculous if you still doubted yourself.”
“You… have faith in me.”
“Of course,” your eyes softened at the vulnerability in his statement. “You’re a powerful Senator.”
He huffed, the crack in his green eyes immediately cementing over. “I know.”
And, there he is. Back to being gruff and dismissive. 
It’s quiet for a moment longer, but you’re okay with that. Small talk is not an interest of yours either, and you’d much rather sip on the flute of drink that a servant had given you than join the crowd on the floor. 
Unfortunately, you have trouble wrenching your eyes away from Padme and Anakin, who are still surrounded by drooling Senators. Padme looks like an angel, dressed in a floor length gown spun out of gold thread that you’re pretty sure came directly from the sun. It shimmers and sparkles as she moves, standing out like a beacon of light among the rest of the room. She is radiant, with a matching headpiece that glitters like a chandelier, the jewels braided in and out of her chocolate curls. Even her makeup is minimal yet blindingly beautiful, with a gold shimmer staining her eyelids and cheekbones that reflect the warmth of her topaz eyes.
“She’s gorgeous, isn’t she?” Clovis murmurs next to you, so quiet you almost don’t hear it.
“Who? Padme?”
“I believe she’s taking quite a liking to the Jedi.”
Heat sparks in your blood again. The fact that even Clovis notices how handsy Padme is being… then again, it’s a known fact that Clovis and Padme have a history, and he could just be reading too far into things out of jealousy.
“You shouldn’t call him that,” you choose to ignore his concerns. “Anyone could be listening.”
“You see that smile? That’s the smile she only ever gave me. I wonder if she even knows she’s doing it…”
“Clovis, Anakin isn’t allowed to form attachments. You have nothing to worry about.”
“It’s not him that bothers me,” he admits. “It’s her. Look. Look at the way she leans into him when she laughs.”
You take his advice and… now that he says it, she does get a little too close for your liking. Every time Anakin finishes a punchline, the crowd erupts in laughter and Padme joins in, bracing herself by gripping onto his arms and grinning into his neck. He catches her, ever the gentlemen, but he’s smiling too.
It’s a little more than innocent, and you can’t tell who’s fault it is. But that doesn’t help the jealousy steadily rising in your chest.
“The debate should be starting soon,” is all you say, leaning back in your seat and scowling into your flute of drink.
The only thing keeping you rooted to the seat instead of launching out of your chair to rip Padme away from Anakin by the hair was the fact that you know you’re the one who’s going to be sharing a bed with him tonight-- not her. 
You’re just hoping he even makes it back to your bed. Or will poor Padme need help with something else that requires Anakin’s doting attention?
A bell rings just on time, signaling for the Senators to take their seats. Anakin leads Padme over, arms hooked around each other, and she smiles at you as she approaches.
“Y/n, you look wonderful,” she whispers, and then slides into the seat between Clovis and Anakin.
Your cheeks burn in shame. How can you harbor such awful feelings toward her when she was so sweet? But the anger is worsened by the compliment she had just given you-- it’s one thing to be drop-dead stunning, why does she have to be so kind, too? What are you to compare? 
After tonight, Anakin’s probably going to think you are so difficult-- always complaining, always tired, never as pretty or gentle or kind. You don’t have a laugh that twinkles like wind-chimes, or eyes that reflect the light like soft glowing pools of honey. If she is the sun, you are just a cold, hard, chunk of ashen moonrock.
The debate goes on for an eternity. You zone out for a lot of it, stewing in your anger and drowning in self-deprecating thoughts. A few times you’re brought to the brink of tears before you remind yourself you’re here on a mission, and throw yourself into scanning every nook and cranny for something that could be amiss. Eventually, a break is ordered.
Senators begin to rise from their podiums to stretch their legs, including Padme. She tells Anakin she’s going to the washroom, and your eyes zero in on the fingers lingering on his arm as she leaves. You stand as well, meaning to walk a little and stretch your legs, and Anakin follows you.
“Padme’s right,” he catches up to you easily. “You do look wonderful. Blue really is your color.”
You stop by the open window, breathing in the fresh air as you search his eyes for truth. Does he truly mean it? Does he look at you with that same light he had looked at Padme with? Or is he only saying it because he has to? Because he’s used to complimenting you because you’re his girlfriend?
“What? What’s the matter?”
“Nothing,” you lower your gaze, picking at the marble stone engravings of the windowsill. 
“Y/n,” Anakin lowers his voice. He’s concerned now, picking up on how upset you are. “I said you look beautiful. What’s the problem?” “No, you said I look wonderful. It’s different than beautiful.” You mean to leave it there, but  can’t help but add, grumbling under your breath, “Padme looks beautiful.”
It’s immature. You know it as soon as you say it, but for some reason you can’t stop yourself. You just want Anakin to take more notice of how strong Padme’s coming on to him, to assure you that it means nothing. You know it means nothing, but you still need that confirmation.
“She does,” he says, and your heart drops. You look up at him, and he’s staring back with an intensity you can’t decipher. “She’s a Senator, Y/n, this is her debate. Of course she has to look beautiful.”
“She’s more beautiful,” the words fall from your lips and taste like poison.
“What’s this about?” Anakin’s voice is dripping in irritation. Once hearing it himself, he closes his eyes and takes a deep breath. When he opens them, he speaks again in a softer tone. “Why are you comparing yourself to Padme?”
Gah, even the sound of her name coming from his mouth is like nails on a chalkboard. But you decide to do the first smart thing you have all evening, and take a lesson from him. You breathe deeply and bite down on your anger before answering.
“I’m not trying to,” you admit, eyes falling from his face to trace the exposed skin of his neck. “I just-- she’s flirting with you.”
“It’s harmless.”
“I-- I know. But…”
“It still bothers you. You’re jealous.”
“I have nothing to be jealous about,” even saying this, you can hear the lie in your voice. You repeat the statement, more to yourself, trying to believe it. He’s yours-- for now. He could just as easily be Padme’s. What if he wants to be Padme’s? 
“Look,” Anakin takes another grounding breath, then fits a finger beneath your chin, tilting it up to look at him. “I can see you’re trying to think rationally, so I’m not going to tell you that you’re being ridiculous. But… you’re being ridiculous.”
“Wow. Thanks.”
“You have to understand, I do not like Padme like you’re thinking. I--” he cuts himself off, eyes flitting around the room before leaning in close to whisper in your ear. “I love you.”
Goosebumps erupt all over your skin, making you shiver. His lips ghosting over your ear, the whispered promise of his devotion to you… suddenly, you feel very stupid.
“Okay,” you accept, and the bells ring again, signalling everyone to take their seats. You head on over with him, but not before putting as much heart into your next words. “I’m sorry for getting jealous.”
“It’s okay,” he gives you the first warm smile of the night, smoothing your hair down quickly before breaking off to take his own seat.
You sit next to Clovis, considerably calmer, replaying Anakin’s whispered “I love you” over and over in your head, the touch of his gentle hand in your hair. There was no need to make such a fuss, and honestly you were upset with yourself for ruining the night. You decide to make another smart decision for the night, and push away all of the negative thoughts to the deepest corner of your mind. No more, not tonight-- instead, you would focus on a way to make it up to him for being so ridiculous, and to thank him for being so patient with you.
It’s as you’re planning the rest of your night out, that you see Clovis’s knee bouncing under the podium. You know his time to speak is coming up soon, and his actions betray his mind. He’s such a liar. He is nervous.
“You’ve got this,” you tell him, reaching onto the podium to give his hand a squeeze. His palms are clammy, and he looks at you like you’ve struck him.
“I know I do,” he spits, but doesn’t move his hand from underneath yours. “It’s just pre-performance jitters.”
His next words are so quiet, you almost don’t catch them.
“It doesn’t help that I have two gorgeous women sitting next to me to witness this all.”
Now it’s your turn to look like you’ve been struck. You know he means for you to hear it, otherwise he wouldn’t have said it. Anakin seems to be thinking the same thing, as you can see him give Clovis a sidelong glance just as Padme takes the seat between them again.
“I-- um… we’re rooting for you,” you fumble. “No need to get nervous now.”
Clovis blows out a long breath, and then covers your hand that’s squeezing his palm with his other. “Thank you, Y/n. You’ve truly been so patient and accommodating this whole night. I must find a way to pay you back afterwards.”
“Oh, there’s no need--” your words are cut off as the delegates call for order, and then the debate resumes. You don’t miss the way Anakin’s back stiffens in his seat.
Clovis works up a nervous sweat in the minutes leading up to his speech, but when he gets up, he delivers it without a flaw. Everyone claps, and then Padme goes. You clap along once she’s finished, trying not to calculate if Anakin is clapping harder or faster for her than anyone else. He’s not… but you just had to be sure.
There never seemed to be any threat for the entire night, except for one instance. A young man stood by the door, eyes shifting around for a moment too long to be casual, and Clovis seemed to notice as well. 
“Where, exactly, is that equipment you were speaking of earlier?”
“There’s a strap on my thigh, and it holds my blaster to it. Look,” you pull your skirt back to reveal your leg up to your thigh, where the tip of your blaster peaks out. “See, nothing to worry about.”
It doesn’t even cross your mind that Anakin would notice, or that he’d even mind.
Finally, the debate ends, and the senate room is dismissed. You let out a long breath, ready to just get out of this dress and relax in the suite with Anakin now. However, you stand to leave your seat but Clovis is in your way.
“Y/n, like I said before… I must show my gratitude for your services. Please, let me buy you dinner.”
“Oh-- Oh geez… um.... I can’t,” your eyes flit from Clovis to Anakin, who’s standing behind him. He’s got his back turned, bidding farewell to the new friends he made, but you know for sure that he’s listening. “I really need to go to bed, we’re leaving early in the morning.”
“You can come to my suite, we can order room service. They’re right next to each other… besides, you can always just stay over at mine for the night. There’s room.”
That tone. Those eyes. You know what he’s insinuating, and it sure as hell isn’t just dinner. 
“Clovis, I’d love to, but I really can’t.”
“Oh. Okay.”
The green cracks of his eyes are hardening again, the soft daisies growing from them being wrenched out in clenched fists and stomped under a boot. You want to stop them from freezing over in that insufferable ice again, and decide it might be nice to humor him for a job well done tonight. After all, he was a lot kinder to you than you thought he’d ever be, and part of you likes being one of the few people on his good side.
“How about I walk back with you to the apartments? We can do that much.”
Clovis smiles, and holds out an arm. “I’ll take it.”
As Clovis escorts you out of the debate room, you turn to look back at Anakin. He’s ushering Padme out of the crowds, staring after you as you leave. He doesn’t smile, or wave, or do anything really. Except look angry. 
A sudden ball of nervousness forms in the pit of your stomach. Oh no. Offering to do this was a mistake, that much is becoming clear with every step you take with Clovis latched onto your arm. You can feel Anakin’s eyes burning into your back the entire way out of the senate building, until you’re on the streets of Naboo and he’s off in a limousine with Padme. 
Of course he’s going to be angry at you now. You were mad at him for allowing Padme to flirt with him, and now he’s going to think you’re making a move on Clovis to get back at him for it. Even though that’s not at all what’s happening… Oh how the tables have turned. 
You’re jittery the whole walk back. Clovis tries to make conversation, but you only offer him short, clipped answers. Really, you should have shut down his advances in the debate room. No matter that you pitied him for being rejected by Padme and yourself, you should have said no. You didn’t owe him anything. But here you are, and now you are going to suffer the consequences from Anakin when you get back to your room.
“Are you sure you can’t stop in? Not even just for a drink?” Clovis asks as you make it to the top of the stairs. You turn the corner, and Anakin is leaning against your apartment door, arms crossed, clearly waiting for you. 
“Uhh,” you unwind your arm from around Clovis’s. “I really can’t. Sorry.”
Clovis follows your gaze, and sees Anakin. His tone turns steely. “Is it because of that Jedi?”
“No, oh my-- no!” you feign the most incredulous expression you can, nerves growing more frenzied as you grow closer to your apartment door. “I really am just so tired. Please Clovis, I have to go.”
“Y/n, it doesn’t have to be like this--”
“You’re right,” a deep voice cuts in. “It doesn’t.” 
Anakin takes the arm that Clovis refused to let go of, and slips it out of his grasp. Thankfully, for Clovis’s sake, he lets him. Anakin pushes you behind him and stands before Clovis, towering over him by a couple inches. 
“It was a pleasure serving you and Senator Amidala. Hopefully we can work together again soon. Have a good night”
Each word that comes from his lips are dripping with venom. Clovis grows red in the face, and you can tell he’s trying hard not to retaliate. In the end, he decides to turn and stalk back to his own apartment door. 
Once it slams shut, Anakin turns to you. You meet his eyes with the most innocent expression you can put on.
“None of that,” he hisses, and steps past you to walk into the apartment.
“Oh, come on!” you follow close behind, closing the door and jogging to catch up with him. He’s standing before the bed, roughly loosening his tie. “Anakin, please don’t be mad. I didn’t mean it like that.”
“Really? How am I supposed to believe that after what happened earlier?”
“Yes, okay, I admit I was jealous of you and Padme. But I got over it! I swear I wasn’t trying to get you back for it, I promise. I wouldn’t do that to you.”
Anakin pulls the buttons off his shirt so hard, you’re afraid they might break. Suddenly, he is shirtless, and so very mad, and so very tall… and muscular… and… wow…
“You can’t even look me in the eye when you say that,” he argues, stopping to stand before you. You wrench your eyes away from his toned midriff and meet his eyes, which are blazing with hurt and anger. A warmth is rising in your veins-- a different kind than earlier-- but it’s beat out with something stronger. Guilt.
“I’m sorry,” you tell him, trying so desperately to ignore the heat that’s radiating off his chest. “I really am. Clovis was just… kinder than I expected him to be--”
“Was he? Was he kind when he had you sit in silence all afternoon in the senate building? Was he kind when he refused to let you eat? When he guilt-tripped you into spending time with him?”
“That’s not exactly what happened,” you cross your arms and size him up. “And you’re not totally innocent either, you know.”
“Really?” Anakin cocks an eyebrow at you, sitting down on the bed roughly. He leans back on his arms, daring you to continue.
“You let Padme flirt with you, and you never told her to stop. You could have set some boundaries, told her to back off a little...”
“And you could have told me you were leaving with Clovis before gathering your skirts and skipping away,” Anakin bites back. 
“I wasn’t planning to! Anakin, please, both of us made mistakes tonight. Can we just agree on that?”
He frowns, eyes flickering over your still-dressed form. He motions for you to come closer and turn around, so you do. Gentle fingers work at the zip on your back, dragging it down to free you from the constraints. You remember the note he wrote from earlier, how he couldn’t wait to take the dress off of you, and grow disappointed at how the night had gone. This was not the context you had been expecting. 
The way his hands linger on your waist, you know he’s thinking the same thing.
“Okay. We both made mistakes.” You feel his soft curls against the bare skin of your back as rests his forehead against you. You hold your dress up in the front so as not to expose yourself. “I’m sorry for letting Padme flirt with me. I should have put an end to it-- I know it hurt you to watch.”
“It did,” you whisper. “But I’m also sorry. For getting so jealous even though you never accepted her advances, and for making it seem like I was trying to get revenge. It wasn’t my intention.”
A soft “it’s okay” is kissed into your back. His hands grip your waist, turning you in his grasp. He’s looking up at you now, hair mussed up and eyes wary. “You good?”
“Yeah. You?”
“Yes.”
“Okay.”
What were you guys doing? At the end of the day, it’s you and him. Padme is out of the picture, and so is Clovis. Everything is alright, and that fuss you both put up throughout the night was virtually pointless.
Looking into his eyes, the ones you love so much and could never picture yourself ever parting from, suddenly this whole thing seems elementary. How terrible, disastrous, and ironic this night turned out. Replaying the events in your head, you find a smile begin to crack at your lips. Anakin can’t keep a straight face either, the ridiculousness of it all beginning to catch up with you both. You begin to laugh, and he follows, burying his head in your stomach as you hug around his neck.
“We must be back in training school,” you giggle, feeling his shoulders shake beneath you. “How pathetic of us.”
“Ahh,” he groans, suddenly wrenching you off your feet and onto the bed on top of him. He nuzzles his face into your neck, pulling you as close to him as possible. “Let’s just forget this night ever happened. It was dreadful and embarrassing.”
“As far as I’m concerned, I was never even here.��
“Me neither,” he presses a line of warm kisses down your neck, stopping at the strap of your dress. “Let’s get this off. Do you still have your blaster on you?”
You pat the metal strapped onto your thigh. “Locked and loaded.”
“Well, gee, thanks for telling me. I definitely didn’t want to get my head blown off.”
“Safety’s on, wisecrack,” you help him shrug your dress off, kicking it from your legs and off the end of the bed. You unclasp the band from around your thigh and distribute the blaster onto the nightstand. 
“I’m the wisecrack,” you don’t miss the way Anakin’s voice deepens, attention suddenly captured by the bare skin of your body beneath him. His eyes follow the path his fingers are tracing up your leg. “Careful, or I’ll have to report that to the Council.”
“For what? Being right?”
“For creating conflict of interest on the job,” his fingers skim the soft flesh of your upper thighs, tickling their way past the curve of your hips, the dip of your waist, up and up and up… “It’s terribly naughty of you.”
His words are teasing and corny, but somehow the deeper insinuation of them still cause your cheeks to burn red. 
“Anakin,” your voice is hoarse, causing your blush to deepen. His long fingers cup your chin, keeping your lips ghost over his as his other hand pulls the silver clasps from your hair. “I need a shower.”
“I can meet you in there?”
You clutch at his shoulders, bringing him forward to close that gap between your lips. His mouth is warm against yours, pliant and soft and generous. It’s everything you’ve been yearning for all night, all this time you’ve been apart. The smell of him, taste of him, feel of him— you could never get enough. 
“I’ll save you a spot.” 
647 notes · View notes
miscellaneous-bnha · 4 years ago
Text
A little “Christmas Magic”
Kirishima x Fem!Reader x Denki
This is my piece for @lemonlordleah-shinzawa-kitten’s Citrus Dome “Snowed In” Collab.
Link to the Collab: https://tomurasprincess.tumblr.com/post/637531853698547712/citrus-dome-server-snowed-in-collab
Warning: slightly Scumbag Kiri/Denki, dubious consent (at the start), Possessive/FeralDenki, Smug Kiri, some exhibitionism, lowkey yandere Denki if you squint, dumbification, a little tongue pulling, light cum play
Also, I write Denki as someone who pretends to be stupid but is actually extremely intelligent.
ALL CHARACTERS ARE AGED UP
Being childhood friends with Denki had it’s perks; knowing how intelligent your best friend is compared to how stupid he likes to act is one of them, so you knew that it was no accident he kept you distracted long enough for the blizzard to roll in.
Effectively trapping you in his home with his roommate Kirishima.
“Aww come on! It’s not that terrible! We’ve got good heating, enough food n’ snacks. The world’s BEST portable charger,” he points to himself dramatically, “And, if you do get bored of me, Kirishima’s here too.”
“You say that like you were planning on excluding me from your plans.” Kirishima looks at his roommate unimpressed. You stifle a giggle.
“Even if he was, I wouldn’t let him.” You nudge the redhead with your shoulder, making him snort a laugh.
“Fair enough.”
“So you agree it’s not that bad?” Denki bats his eyes at you, causing you to push his face away with a scoff.
“Alright alright. It could be worse.” He grins.
“I’m glad you agree!”
The three of you spend the night talking about the latest games the three of you have been following. They had both just convinced you to download a multiplayer rpg when the power suddenly went out, leaving you all in the dark.
“Oof, unlucky. I guess even state of the art homes still get black outs.” You mutter.
“More likely than you think. Here, why not get closer before the temperature starts to drop.” Kiri offers.
“Sure, why not. I’ll be thankful for it later anyhow.” You sandwich yourself between Denki and Kiri laying on your back as the three of you bundled together.
“Everyone’s phones charged up?” Denki peeks at your phone, still going strong at 95%
“Yeah, it should be good for a while longer. Anyone up for some music?”
For the next 3 hours, you continue to talk until you find yourself growing sleepy. Comfortably warm, you can’t help the way your eyes slip close.
————
When you wake up again, you can still hear the wind whipping around outside. You grab your phone only to be met with the no battery signal. Both boys on either side of you completely knocked out.
You tsk at your own stupidity. ‘I should have turned it off when I realized I was getting sleepy.’ You thought to yourself, leaning over Denki to use his phone to check the time.
The numbers 9:27am stared back at you. Just as you move to settle back into your spot, Denki’s arms suddenly wrap around you.
“Mm… five more minutes…” the angle at which he grabbed you made it so you were lying on top of him, your legs straddling his hips.
“Uhm… Denks…” you try to shake him gently.
“Noooo… jus’ five mmm….” he starts to snore softly again, and you’re left stuck on him.
You sigh, accepting your fate. With your phone dead, you decide whether or not you should stick the charger into his mouth and plug your phone in or if you should just go back to sleep. Unfortunately, with how restless you felt, sleeping wasn’t an option, and you’d feel pretty guilty for disturbing him from what must be a good dream.
A really good dream.
Your face erupts into flames when you realize there’s something hard poking at you. The blush darkens when he groans and his hips jerk up to grind against you.
You would be lying if you said you weren’t ever attracted to your childhood friend; blonde hair, golden eyes, killer smile. You saw how popular he was back then, and you can see it in his hero ratings now. Even aside from his looks, his goofy, lovable, secretly intelligent nature made it impossible not to fall for him all those years ago.
But you also knew he tended to be a flirt, which made it hard to tell if he was genuine. Especially since his advances were never directed at you.
Wishful thinking made it easy to believe that he didn’t flirt with you because “he didn’t want to think the one person he cares the most about to think he was playing with them”, but reason told you otherwise.
You’ve met some of his exes, and none of them were like you.
So, in the friendzone you stayed. ‘Better than nothing’, you reason, and— much to your own surprise— you’re satisfied with that.
You shake your head and squirm. “Denki…! Wake up you idiot!” He snorts when you headbutt his chest, head sitting up as he let you go to rub at the spot you hit.
“Awww… I was having a good dream…”
“I’m sure you were!” You spit, embarrassed.
You make an attempt to hide it. “Also, I need a favor, my phone died while we were sleeping.”
“Ah, yeah. I tried turning your music off, but I guess that didn’t work.” You hum, but nod.
“Thanks for trying. Mind charging it for me?”
He taps a finger to his chin, pretending to think about it before he grins. “Sure, but it’ll cost ya.” You snort.
“Ha ha. What do I owe?”
“A kiss.” You roll your eyes. Even as a kid, Denki always liked to say stuff like that.
You lean down and press a kiss to his cheek.
“There, your kiss. Now can you charge my phone?” You have to bite your tongue to hold back a yelp when you’re suddenly flipped over on your back, Denki hovering over you.
“You can do better than that!” He grins when you snort.
“Oh really now?” You plant another, wetter, kiss to his cheek with a smack. “And is that good enough for you?”
“Nope.”
“Oh come on!” You whisper-yell, fake exasperated, “I give! What more could you possibly want??”
“You really want to know?”
“Yes!”
He pauses, eyes watching you for a moment before suddenly his lips are on yours. One hand cupping your jaw, thumb circling the underside of your chin, the other bracing himself over you.
You don’t expect it, nor do you expect the way he deepens the kiss so effortlessly even while you’re still floundering for steady ground. He almost seems to be intent on trying to keep you stumbling.
You gasp and pant when he parts from your lips with a wet smack; head foggy with confusion, you don’t have any time before his lips are back on yours, smothering you into another blissful, naïve cloud.
You whine when the hand cupping your jaw trails down slowly, fingers intertwining with yours and giving a gentle squeeze, bringing it above your head to pin it there.
“W-Wait!” You gasp, trying to come back down to reality, still not believing what’s happening.
“No.” He nips the side of your neck, making you groan softly, “Waited long enough.”
“Wh- what do you mean??” You don’t get your answer. Instead, he presses more hot kisses to your lips, each accompanied with a soft smack.
“Denki—!” You hiss through your teeth when he bites down on your neck again, harder this time. He covers your mouth with one hand, hushing softly.
“Waited too long for this. Should’ve just said something a long time ago.” His breath is hot against your ear, making you squirm when his teeth nibble on the lobe. “Should’ve told you how I feel ages ago.”
You can’t help the excited thumping of your heart, especially if his words mean what you hope they do. You gasp when you feel his hard on grind against you, sound stolen from you when Denki presses another deep kiss to your lips.
“Fuck, need you. Need you so fucking bad.” He borderline growls as his free hand disappears below the blanket covering the both of you. You’re just about to let the haze overcome you when you suddenly hear Kirishima snort from next to you, making your blood freeze.
“Denki..! Kirishima’s right there—!” He groans burying his face in your neck.
“Fuck..! I know! ‘S fine!” He flips you both again so that you’re on top, tugging at the pair of sweatpants you borrowed and your panties.
“We can’t!” He bucks his hips into yours, making you inhale sharply. He tugs you down so your chest is pressed to his. You can feel the way his heart is pounding through your thin shirts.
“For fuck’s sake, please, baby girl. I can’t. I can’t wait anymore.” He groans into your ear, hands pinning your hips to his, moving you to grind against him.
“But Kirishima—!”
“Kirishima—” He growls his roommate’s name with disdain, making you shudder with fear and arousal, “— won’t know if you stay quiet.” He hisses when he finally manages to slide the sweatpants off of you, bare cock nudging against your panty-clad pussy.
“Please. I need you so fucking bad it hurts. I will combust if I can’t fuck you right fucking now.” You shiver when you feel his fingers pull the crotch of your underwear to the side, fingers sliding through your slick and circling your clit.
“Okay, okay okay okay— wait!” You bite your lip when he shoves his leaking cock into you, growling into your shoulder.
“Fuck, fuck fuckfuckfuckfuck…” he groaned, hips fucking up into you with soft ‘paps’
“Den—ki!” You whine, grinding down on his cock as much as he would let you.
“That’s it, baby…. jus’ keep sayin’ m’ name.”
“Or maybe mine.”
The shock of hearing Kirishima’s voice right by your ear has you clamping down on Denki’s cock, sending you over the edge when he thrusts roughly into you.
“Kiri—“ Denki slaps a hand over your mouth, cutting you off.
“Seriously?” Denki growls, pissed. He doesn’t pull out though, opting to fuck into you still,
“Aww, come on. I’m not the one breaking promises around here, Denki. Don’t get a little salty because I wanted to join in on the fun.” You shudder and moan, overstimulated.
It’s hard to focus on the conversation as yet another orgasm builds. You can barely focus on the fact that you just got caught fucking your childhood friend by his roommate, at least until two hands grab you by your shoulders and pull you against a firm chest.
“Kirishima! Wh—” You whine when one arm wraps around your neck, not squeezing, but keeping you pinned to his chest, the other pinching and pulling at your nipple,
“Kaminari here can’t keep a promise, so I’m just having some fun touching you.” He laughs, seemingly unbothered. Then he whispers into your ear,
“But don’t worry; I’ll give it to you later.” You squeeze and clench around Denki’s cock at the sound of that.
Kirishima’s hand trails down your body, leading a trail of goosebumps until his fingers pinch and tug at your clit. He activates his quirk, the rough sensation of his hardened fingers add to your pleasure until you’re creaming on Denki’s cock all over again. You whine, trying to pull away from the stimulation, but Kiri just holds you there, letting Denki rut up into you until he’s cumming, hissing through his teeth until he can’t bring himself to pull out anymore.
You’re vaguely aware of the fact that he isn’t wearing a condom, but you don’t dwell on it. You don’t have time to as you feel yourself falling asleep again.
————
When you wake up, you’re cuddled in Kirishima’s arms. He gives you a bright, toothy smile when he notices your eyes opening.
“Well good morning, sleeping beauty! Well, good afternoon now.” You groan, feeling a little sore.
“What time is it?”
“About 2pm. You didn’t actually sleep that long.” You grunt.
“Where’s Denki?”
“Grabbing some snacks together. Your phone finished charging, by the way.
He presses the device into your hands and you stare at it owlishly until your brain catches up with your body.
“Ah, thanks.”
“Sure thing.”
You set it off to the side, sitting up and stretching. Your face twists when you feel something leaking out of you.
“Ugh.. I should go and get cleaned up… well, as much as I can anyway.” You throw the blanket to the side, but you don’t have the opportunity to stand before Kirishima’s hands are on your hips.
“About what I said earlier…” he murmurs softly. It takes you a moment, but you blush when you finally remember.
“Wh-what about it?”
“Do you mind?” He squeezes his hands gently.
You chew your lip. Everything considered, he’d watched and helped Denki fuck you, and you certainly were curious…
“... alright, why not?” Kirishima grins before patting his lap, pushing his shorts and boxers down. Your eyes widen when his cock stands,
“Have you been hard this whole time??” As smug as he’d been acting earlier, he seemed to get a little shy at your question
“Maybe, maybe not.”
“You were!” He sputters, but pulls you into his lap.
“Look, of course I’m going to be hard.” He teases the sharp points of his teeth against your neck,
“Thinking about all those noises you made, the way you looked on his cock…” he growls playfully, biting down on your shoulder until you whine softly.
“Shit... just hurry up then!” You grumble, giving his cock a couple of good strokes.
He flips you around so your back is against his chest again, slowly sinking you down on his cock as you both groan.
“Christ... I see why he wasn’t keen on sharing.” Kiri raises you by the hips, slamming you back down on his cock with a hiss,
“So fucking tight baby girl…” he groans as you whine, falling back against his chest. Your body shakes with his laughter.
“Awww… already stupid from my cock stuffing your tight little hole?” He groans, but you can feel the way he grins against your neck,
“That’s alright, baby. I’ll take care of ya.”
Your whines and moans do eventually attract Denki, pulling him away from his task. He scowls at Kirishima, who only continues to lazily bounce you on his cock.
“You could have at least waited until I came back.”
“And miss a chance at fucking her cute little pussy? I don’t think so.” You whine when Kiri forces your hips to still, instead rotating your hips so his cock grinds deep inside.
You feel Denki grip your jaw with one hand, the fingers on his other hand slipping inside your mouth. You yelp when you feel him pinch your tongue, tugging it out and forcing you to tilt your head up to look at him.
“You’ve always had such a pretty little mouth too…” Denki says more to himself than to you, letting go of your tongue in favor of tugging his cock out of his sweatpants.
“Mind if I use it?”
He taps the tip of it against your tongue, groaning a soft “good girl” when you suck on it, only for you to choke when he pushes more of his length into your mouth.
“Hey, take it easy man.” Kiri starts to bounce you on his cock again, making you moan with each drop of your hips. Denki grunts, cupping your cheeks with his hands,
“She’ll be alright, won’t you baby?” You whine softly, too busy focusing on the rising heat in your core.
“Either way, I don’t think she’s coherent enough to even notice if my balls smack against her chin.” Denki says as he snaps his hips forward again, making you gag.
“Well… don’t make her sick.”
“She’ll be fine.”
You moan and gag with every drop and rise of your hips respectfully. In some ways, Denki was right when he said you’d hardly notice him shoving his cock down your throat; come later, it’ll be sore as hell, but for now, it added to the curling pleasure that only seemed to build the more roughly they treated you.
You feel Kirishima reach forward to pinch a nipple, making you gag out a yelp around Denki’s cock. Both of them hiss in unison.
“Shit, I think she liked that.” Kirishima gives it another painful tug, causing you to whine and your cunny to flutter.
“Fuck.. keep doing that.” Denki groans out, forgetting completely about your comfort for a moment when he shoves his dick all the way down your throat, making you choke when Kirishima buries himself balls deep.
You feel like your head is floating aimlessly by the time they start to lose control. Between Kiri’s thick, heavy cock splitting you open and Denki fucking your face, your eyes roll back as you cum hard, whining and moaning through your choked noises.
“Fuuuuuck, that’s it baby! Just tighten up like that!” Kirishima growls as he abandons your nipple, opting to rub your clit instead to keep you cumming.
Denki hisses and pulls his cock out of your mouth, instead leaving the tip on your tongue as he strokes himself to completion.
Both men are loud when they cum, and you can only whine when you feel your body turn to gelatin again.
You grimace when Denki pushes his cum around on your tongue, only removing his finger when he’s satisfied with the look of it. “Swallow for me, yeah?” He pets your cheek when you comply, smiling in satisfaction.
You can feel Kirishima’s cum leak out of you the second he pulls out. He lets out a low whistle, lightly patting your ass. “What a sight to behold.”
You flop back against Kirishima’s chest, groaning softly. “Now can I get cleaned up?”
“Of course. Just give us a sec, yeah?”
“Or you could just stay like this for-“
“No thank you, Denki.”
“Party pooper.”
424 notes · View notes
djarrex · 4 years ago
Text
Countermeasures || 1
Archives
Fives x ofc!reader
Tumblr media
x | next chapter ->
| main masterlist | series masterlist | read on ao3 |
Rating: 18+
Word Count: 3.6k
Warnings: mentions of lust? is that a warning? otherwise, nothing yet ;)
chapter summary: Renna (you), an intern who spent the entirety of her internship thus far filing paperwork in the archives of Tipoca City’s medical wing, finally is able to work with a real patient - that patient just so happens to be Fives.
note: Renna will basically be taking the place of AZI-3 in the Conspiracy arc. A lot of the dialogue I wrote is from the episode, and of course I added more to dig deeper into Renna and Fives as characters. When this idea came in my head I was only planning on writing it as a oneshot. As I starting writing this, however, I realized there was so much more that could be done with it since this arc is both a good one and a sad one. If you’re ready to go on this journey with me, then keep going under the cut! <3 Also, I wanted to add that there will be POV changes in this chapter. I don’t know if I’ll stick with that going forward, but we’ll see.
* tbh special thanks to @bvcketfvcker for coming up with the series title and being da Best™ 
***
The archives of the medical wing in Tipoca City, the capital of the watery planet Kamino, were always so cold and lonely. Every single day of your internship thus far has included you being nearly drowned in paperwork, no real field experience to show for it.
You’ve been on Kamino for your medical internship for what, close to six months now? You were still stuck doing paperwork. Maybe at the six month mark you’d be moved up to sterilizing all the medical equipment, which would seem terrible to anyone else, but at least you’d be in proximity to anything remotely “medical”. You were longing to get your hands dirty, to start real field experience, to learn how to heal. You wanted to help people, to help anyone in need. You wanted to learn the practices for saving someone’s life. Everything you wanted, you could not get if you were stuck in the archives with paperwork as your only companion. 
You decided within your first month that you would not let the paperwork and lack of real purpose get to you. So, you made your situation better by wearing - to the best of your ability - a positive attitude. On the day that marked the end of your first month here, the Kaminoans told you that music can be played in the archives as long as it’s not too loud, so you brought in a small radio the very next day. The start of your second month was a little better than the day before. You hummed to the music playing on the radio as you tried to make a game out of filing the paperwork. Turns out, not even a simple game could be made out of something so boring and tedious as filing paperwork.
You lost count of the days you’ve been in Tipoca City, within the archives shelled by the stilted dome structures, after your second month. Every day was exactly the same; you filed and shredded paperwork, organized reports, and finished filling out medical reports that the Kaminoan doctors didn't even want to bother with. Every day you woke up early, headed to the archives, and spent your entire day there in solitude until it was time to head back to your quarters for the night. Lunch was always dropped off to you by a couple of guards from the Kamino Security Team. The guards were always in full grey and white armor but you already knew what they looked like; they were clones, and you’ve seen their face in every file. They were handsome, sure, but there were literally hundreds of thousands of them out there. 
You were pretty sure you were coming up on month six of your monotonous internship. Waking up and getting ready was a routine ingrained in your bones. You were taking the regular route to the archives from your quarters when you were stopped by a couple Kaminoan doctors on the way. To your surprise, they asked you to follow them, which you were hoping translated to you not having to work in the archives anymore. Maybe month six was the lucky number.
You walked behind the tall and slender creatures through unfamiliar halls. You had no idea where you were following them to, but anywhere was better than where you were originally heading. 
They kept walking, with you in tow, when you passed by the only Jedi you’ve ever really spoken to - Master Shaak Ti, a calm and collected Togruta who was known to have a soft spot for the clones here on Kamino. The Jedi nodded in greeting to the Kaminoans in front of you, then over at you. With no words spoken, you were now following the Jedi through the halls, still unsure of the destination. 
Just around the corner, you saw two very decorated troopers coming towards you. They donned blue and white armor with a ton of other accessories. As they got closer, the one trooper removed his helmet and carried it at his side. This trooper had the usual dark brown hair and kept the common clone cut style. The way this clone walked with his helmet pressed to his hip had awoken something in you, though you couldn't put your finger on exactly what that something was.
“General Shaak Ti.” The other clone removed his helmet as he greeted the Jedi. He was blonde and sported a closely shaved cut; despite having the same face and body, the two clone troopers looked completely different. They were unlike any clones you’ve ever seen.
That’s when you noticed another trooper laying on a stretcher behind them; his hair was long enough to be worn in a bun, a tear drop was inked underneath one of his closed eyes. He was also unlike any clone you’ve ever seen - especially since he appeared to be unconscious, He was hooked up to oxygen, you also noticed, as two guards pushed his floating stretcher right by you and around the corner, out of sight once they went down the hall.
You realized how zoned out you were and quickly snapped back to reality - only for only a second, though - as you became transfixed on the clone in front of you on the right, the one with dark hair. You scanned his features a little more now that he was closer; he had a dark goatee that framed his chin and his right temple had the number “5″ inked on the skin. His armor was crazy different from the armor the guards here wore. He looked... good. Uh oh. 
For just a brief moment, the “good looking” trooper’s eyes broke away from his conversation with the Jedi and met yours. Slightly embarrassed, you snapped your head forward and glued your eyes to the Kaminoan’s ankles in front of you.
Just as you started listening in on the conversation, the two clones, the Jedi General, and Dr. Nala Se broke away and turned the corner in the same direction they took the unconscious trooper.
Kriff. You missed the entire conversation. The Kaminoans started moving forward, and you assumed you were still supposed to follow them, so you did. You still had no clue where you were going, but you’ll get there eventually. 
***
Fives’ POV
Fives walked to the left of Rex, a long-neck doctor in between them, while Tup’s unconscious body was guided by two Kamino guards behind them. 
“You will have to say goodbye to your friend now.” The long-neck broke the silence. Fives was worried for his friend. No one, not even Kix, could figure out what was wrong with him. Why would Tup shoot and kill General Tiplar? Fives noticed Tup was acting somewhat strange right before it all happened, but didn’t think too much of it at the time, Now, he’s racking his brain, trying to understand what set Tup off. He’s a good soldier, a good man. He’d never do such a thing in his right mind. 
It was suggested that Tup be sent to Tipoca City, to Kamino, back to his roots, for a better chance of figuring out what was wrong with him. Fives gladly accepted the offer to escort his friend there, and was overjoyed that Rex came along with them.
General Shaak Ti came into view, and the troopers came to a halt. Captain Rex greeted the General, and she turned her attention over to Fives.
“Fives, am I correct?” He nodded. Tup was being pushed from behind them and then around the corner in front of them, quickly going out of view. The General spoke again, her eyes glued on the unconscious trooper being led down the hall. “You’ve served with Tup?”
Fives was desperate to be by his friend’s side right now. “Yes.”
Then he saw you. You, a foreign species to Kamino. What were you doing here? It had been a while since Fives was last on Kamino, but he was sure there weren’t any others like you here before unless they were Jedi - but the only Jedi known to hang around Kamino was General Shaak Ti.
He had noticed you tailing the long-necks before you had even come entirely into view. Fives let his eyes flicker over to you as Tup was being taken away, only to have locked eyes with you for but a second. He noticed you blushed right before you snapped your head forward, obviously embarrassed that you’d been caught staring. General Shaak Ti’s voice broke Fives’ trance - didn’t even notice he was losing focus once he caught your eyes - and it was all over in less than five seconds. 
“You must come with me.” 
Fives quickly snapped his attention back to General Shaak Ti, “with... all due respect, General, I can’t just abandon him now.” The Jedi General smiled reassuringly, and turned to lead Fives and Rex down the hall in the same direction Tup was taken. 
Fives knew where his undivided attention should be, and that was on Tup - his friend - his friend that for some reason just gunned down a Jedi in the heat of battle in the space station just outside of Ringo Vinda, only to come to with no memory of what he had done. Fives cursed himself for thinking of you when his friend was about to be strapped to an exam table, being poked and prodded like some kind of lab scurrier. 
***
Renna’s POV
Dr. Nala Se, the Chief Medical Scientist on Kamino, approached you once you had gotten to the head medical lab and informed you that you’d be the one who would start procedures on a clone trooper who had potentially been exposed to a virus of some kind. You nodded, all too giddy as you gladly accepted the task.
You were escorted by two guards to where you’d be working with the patient. When the door whisked open, you slowly made your way into the quiet room, the door shutting quickly behind you. You glanced to the right, noticing the window that would normally allow you to see into the room next door was blacked out - put into the privacy setting. Strange. 
“You?” The deep voice - a voice that sounded like honey in your ears - put a halt on your thoughts about the darkened window. You knew it was the voice of a clone; the only voices you ever heard were either the slow, drawn out words of the Kaminoans or the clones’. Of course a clone would be in that room, of course a clone would be the subject of your testing.
Who you didn’t expect to see was the clone trooper you saw in passing not even a half hour ago - the one with the dark goatee and number 5 tattooed on his temple - the one who made you blush when he caught you staring. 
You felt yet another blush heat your cheeks before you even registered it was happening. What the hell were you blushing for? He’s a clone, and you’re here to take blood samples and body scans to make sure he’s okay. You knew you were staring at him like a fool, and for way too long. You shook your head slightly in an attempt to reorganize your thoughts. 
“You ok, Miss... miss?” He stood up from his seating position on the cot, and cocked his head to the side with his arms folded across his chest. You nodded your head slowly.
“Renna,” you nearly whispered your name to him - the words almost came out choked - for some reason you had forgotten how to speak in Basic for a moment. 
“Look, Miss Renna, I am not a threat. Neither is Tup.” 
Your brow raised as you studied the clone’s expression. It was hard; his eyes were piercing and his brows were furrowed. Crossed arms flew to his sides, hands tightening into fists. No doubt he was feeling angry and confused.
“T- Tup?” Was that the name of CT-5385? “You’re referring to CT-5385?”
“Tup! The trooper in that room right there?” He pointed over to the darkened window, “He’s a good soldier, my friend, and he’s in the room next door getting - getting tortured by those long-necks.” A beat. “None of us clones go by numbers anymore, by the way.” You closed your eyes for just a moment, trying to think about what to say next. You inhaled deep through your nose, then slowly out through parted lips, watching as his expression went from angry to more... afraid? Worried?
“Trooper, I promise Tup is in good hands. I’ve been briefed on his- his condition... they - we - just want to find out what made him kill Jedi General Tiplar, that’s all. They’ve asked me to do a couple of procedures on you, take some notes, since you were close with Tup. Maybe we can find something in you that will help your friend.” 
The trooper’s expression changed again, softening as his fists unclenched at his sides. Surely he had to understand the gravity of the situation; when you were briefed, it was mentioned that no one on Kamino had any idea why CT-53 - Tup - shot a Jedi General in cold blood, or why he keeps floating in and out of consciousness, murmuring things like “kill Jedi”. Clone trooper Tup seemed to have no memory of what he had done; and so far, no scans were showing anything wrong with him, though his health was deteriorating.
You walked over to the counter where the sterilized needles and scanners resided and started to prep the equipment, reading over notes to see what it is you needed and what you were supposed to be testing him for. Reading through the notes, you realized this trooper’s designation was ARC-5555, and the tattoo “5″ on his temple made sense now. It was actually kind of... cute.
It was silent for a couple minutes while you were getting everything ready when a loud, airy sigh coming from behind you made you turn around to face ARC-5555.
“The name’s Fives.”
***
Fives’ POV
Fives was getting more worried for Tup by the minute. His rising frustration didn’t help, either. General Shaak Ti had engaged the privacy setting on Fives’ only view of his unconscious friend, leaving him in the dark as to what the long-necks were doing to Tup in the room next door. 
Fives sat in the room in silence, alone with his worries and doubts. You were out of his thoughts at this point; the worry and fear he felt for Tup swallowed him whole - until you were the one walking through the door. It could have been any Kaminoan, any droid, yet you were the one they had sent. 
His eyes wide, he watched you slowly walk in as you immediately set your attention to the darkened window to the right side of the room. Fives wanted to know if you knew what they were doing to Tup, why they were hurting him, why Fives wasn’t able to be there by his side. He had a million questions, almost all of them relating to Tup, except for the ones he had about you. 
Fives was sitting on a cot on the other side of the room, and you hadn’t noticed him yet. What is she doing here? Who is she? She definitely isn’t a long-neck. He wanted to ask you all kinds of questions, a mix between wanting to know more about Tup and wanting to know more about you, but all he could muscle out was one word. 
“You?” Fives shook his head in disbelief as the first word he said to you left his lips. It did manage to get your attention, though, because you turned away from the dark window and were now staring directly at him. Fives felt his heart beat just a little harder when he could finally take in your whole figure in more than just a quick glance. You were beautiful - more beautiful than anything he’d ever seen, and wearing the same thing he saw you in earlier; a tucked-in dark grey skin-tight top that came up your neck like clone under-armor blacks did, a white lab coat that came down to your ankles, hugging your curves in all the right ways along the way. The coat was open in the front, save for the one buttoned part right at your waist, just barely keeping the coat together. Your black boots were knee-high, your black leggings tucked into them. You stepped closer to Fives and his heart started racing; he was completely in awe of you, but there was something else, and it made warmth head straight to his groin.
***
Renna’s POV
Fives. That was his name. Not ARC-5555 , just like Tup wasn’t CT-5385. “No clones go by numbers anymore,” he had informed you. Being waist-deep in paperwork all the time never gave you an opportunity to actually work with the clones. All you knew about the clones were their designations, along with whatever the paperwork was filed for. It didn’t occur to you that they had names. 
“Look, is Tup gonna be alright? Have they found anything out?” Fives’ eyes were pleading, begging for some kind of reassurance. 
“Please, sit down.” He huffed, but obeyed. “We’re using hyper level tests, so we should get the results fairly quickly.” He nodded his head, thankful for any little crumb you could give him. “I’m gonna need to get started now, okay?”
Needle in hand and ready to go, you preemptively apologized. 
“Wh- ow!” You jabbed the needle into the side of his neck, a sympathetic smile on your lips. 
“I said I was sorry!” You chuckled quietly. Fives rubbed at his neck and you made you way back over to the counter, inserting the needle into the port next to the computer. 
“Well?” His hand still rubbing at his neck, you squinted your eyes to read the results displayed on the screen. 
“Everything... seems normal.” You weren’t exactly sure what to expect, but you were happy your very first patient wasn’t immediately dying on you.
“Oh, great! That means you can let me out, right?” The excited tone in his voice made it quite difficult to relay the next part to him.
With an apologetic smile, you walked back over and sat on the cot across from him.
“Actually... I’m afraid that’s not possible right now, Fives. I was instructed to keep you in quarantine until we’ve pinpointed the exact cause of Tup’s breakdown. We can’t risk any further casualties.” You couldn't bear to look at him now, so you glued your eyes to a fresh scuff mark on the toe of your boot.
“Like I told you before, I am not a threat, and neither is Tup!” You looked back up at him when his voice raised. Fives wasn’t angry, or at least it didn’t appear that way. He was worried for his friend. 
“I- I believe you, Fives. Unfortunately, I’m not the one to make those kinds of calls. I’m just- just an intern. This is my first day not filing paperwork in the archives. I don’t- I don’t want to mess this up. You’re my first real patient.” You stood up to leave the room, letting your hand rest on his shoulder for just a moment in an attempt to comfort him. Something you never thought you’d be doing - comforting a clone. You told him you’d be back later to check up on him and to perform any tests the doctors deemed necessary. Then you left.
***
As you headed for your quarters for the night, you couldn’t help but think back on your introductory meeting with your very first patient. You replayed your short conversation over and over in your head; you transfixed on his voice, the raw emotion in it that went straight to his facial expressions, and the way he looked at you. You’ve seen his face many, many times in the files you were doused with daily, but most of the clones on Kamino didn’t have anything significant to mark them apart from one another - no scars, tattoos, different hair styles, and were generally clean-shaven. When you first saw Fives, his tattoo and facial hair was what did it for you. You hated to admit it, but you may have just accidentally gotten a crush on the ARC Trooper.
This was all new to you. You never realized clones had such... emotion. Or capable of such emotion, for that matter. You were kept in the dark for the entirety of your internship on Kamino, and now you understood why. You weren’t Kaminoan, you weren’t a Jedi, you were just an intern. In their eyes, there was no reason as to why you should engage the clones, so they kept you busy with paperwork every day. You wondered if you were physically kept away from the clones because you were also human, and therefore were able to share the same emotion and ideals as them. That idea wouldn’t have made sense to you if you thought about it earlier today, but now that you met Fives, it made sense.
Maybe the Kaminoans were fearful that you would be a distraction to them, or them to you. 
***
Tags: @bvcketfvcker @deewithani @chromia7567
89 notes · View notes
hgghgfd · 7 months ago
Text
02/2003 - Black Velvet Magazine "Queen Adreena in Wonderland"
Tumblr media Tumblr media
(Interview with Katie Jane Garside - Taken From Black Velvet 35 - Feb 2003)
By David Jackson
In Milton Keynes, roundabouts have names. While frantically searching for ‘Eagle Stone’, a giant illuminated mountain on the horizon grows ever closer, eventually turning out to be a snow dome. Only in Milton Keynes. In an idealistic reality, Milton Keynes Pitz would be a dark smoke filled rock venue, located somewhere deep underground, out of reach of daylight with filthy walls and sticky floors, perfectly recreating the image the venue’s name paints. The truth is much less romantic. Located in the Woughton Leisure Centre, the Pitz sits firmly alongside a swimming pool while sharing a corridor with the health club and sun bedroom. Doubling as a theatre it’s not unfair to say the Pitz is one of the country’s less charismatic venues.
The public perception of QUEEN ADREENA vocalist and spokeswoman, Katie Jane Garside is varied, never quite consistent yet always fascinating. Appearing somewhat removed yet mysterious, she stands unique. Following Katie into the depths of the Milton Keynes Pitz, we arrive at the band’s dressing room. Informing me that she’s in a good mood, Katie takes a seat while continuing to arrange a small bunch of flowers in a glass on the table.
Queen Adreena are on tour in promotion of ‘Drink Me’. As a successor to their highly acclaimed debut ‘Taxidermy’, in many ways the album sounds a comfortable follow up. Finally settled, Black Velvet proceeds to ask Katie how happy she is with the final product. “In a way it’s not for me to say,” she cautiously begins. “We went through a lot making it. You do with every record, but this one particularly was quite difficult. It was kind of a year of reckoning in a way, writing and recording it. A lot of things that sustained me prior to that all fell away. I have a real sense of vertigo, no ground under my feet. I can’t really say if I’m happy or not with the album. To be honest the day that I am will be the day I don’t do it anymore. “Being on a planet in the middle of infinity with six miles of water underneath you and then infinity above you it doesn’t give you much to hold onto,” referring to her youth, part of which was spent living on a boat. “On the flip side of that, there’s infinity but if you get on the wrong side of the coin you can get into free fall terror. That’s sort of how I feel about that record, it’s just a page in the diary.”
It was author Lewis Carroll in his book, Alice in Wonderland, who first penned the words ‘Drink Me’, written on a label attached to a bottle from which Alice drinks and is subsequently shrunk. Was it from this that the album took its name? “Yes, it’s not hard to get there. Know your own poison really, that’s all it is. I’ve always found the only useful thing to do with fear is to run headlong into it, and that’s the only way it transforms, otherwise it’s always over your shoulder in your blind spot, so you have to sort of wrestle it to the ground really. It’s about knowing your own poison… Drink me.”
As the interview continues Katie’s fingers are in a constant state of activity, be it continuing to arrange flowers or further looping straps on her bag. However, every so often, Katie looks up, wide-eyed, with one of the MOST mesmerising stares I’ve ever seen. Many of Queen Adreena’s unique traits have carried over to the band’s second album. In many ways ‘Drink Me’ can be seen as an extension of ‘Taxidermy’. Or is it a completely new entity? Pausing for thought Katie continues. “It is just another page in the diary. A lot of the things I said were sustaining me fell away, all the things that were keeping me upright sort of fell away, during that part of my life, making the record, I think it’s reduced things to their baser elements. In a way ‘Taxidermy’ is tugging in a lot of different directions. For me ‘Taxidermy’ is quite existentialist where I’m observing and witnessing and ‘Drink Me’ I’m taking part. I do use sexuality and violence to sort of beat myself back into existence because I’ve felt perpendicular. I’ve found myself to be dangerously insular. That again is what I said about the only useful thing to do with fear is to run headlong into it, because I lived in a tree house for a long time, just lived above everything, not taking part and I want to be here. Well I have to be here, otherwise I might as well not be here. As a kid I could never come downstairs to my own birthday party. I wanna take part, I actually wanna be there now, but I’m sick of living outside of everything.”
One apparent difference between debut and follow up album is Queen Adreena’s frequent use of dark atmospheric vocals seems to made way for a general heavier rock feel to the record. “The subtler things have fallen,” begins Katie. “Like a boiling pot it has reduced down to its really basic elements; it’s very minimalist. We’re trying to break the shell of the seed so the plant can fucking grow. Like my own life, we always watch from the wings and we wanna play the main stage. I am using violence and friction to create a chemical reaction hopefully. The only thing I find to be true is fiction that creates combustion and therefore doesn’t mean it’s easy or painful but it’s a fountain of youth in a way. It’s the only thing that turns me on and drives me forward.”
With only one single lifted from album ‘Drink Me’ (so far), the unusual decision was taken to release non-album track ‘FM Doll’. Not the usual procedure of album promotion. “I didn’t want to look backwards. Making the record was kinda wrestling the thing to the ground,” describes Katie. “There was a great sense of relief. We’ve got a completely new rhythm section in effect now. I don’t want to sound like I’m doing my dirty washing, but we fired out old drummer after we did the album for the first time because it was not played very well. Then we went and recorded the whole thing in five days in a tiny demo studio. By the time we had the things in our hands it was, suffice to say, after finally getting the thing finished, we’d been writing like crazy and just thought there’s no point kinda eating yesterday’s dinner. FM Doll came out so quickly so natural and easily in a way. I feel like I kinda like parodying myself to such an extreme on that.” The title of the single itself is one of hidden truths, quickly revealing a dark sub-text to the song. “It’s actually called ‘Fuck Me Doll’ and is about female objectification. In a way I shouldn’t really talk about it cause we’re desperate to get it onto daytime radio.” Treading her ground carefully Katie continues. “I know because of the lyrical content it won’t get on there. It’s about child murder. Do you remember the JonBenet case in America? The child beauty queen who was supposing murdered by her mother and father It’s about that and the endemic infection in the female psyche.”
Despite the somewhat unusual decisions surround the single release, as ever it’s accompanied with a promotional video. Talk of which is immediately greeted with laughter. “Well it’s a performance video, but, it’s sexy, that’s it. The whole thing with this is that I’m trying to burn down the cross that I’ve nailed myself to. It’s always about that. The illness that endemic in the female psyche, it’s just the way of the world where you’re just valued as an object. I think there’s a lot of power inherent in the feminine. I’ve always known it, used it, abused it myself so I’m can’t really go down a militant route with it because there’s a lot of power and joy within it. But it’s also for someone that’s not strong enough to carry it. It turns people into victims. It’s a very peculiar state I think that we’re in at the moment in history in terms of female objectification because it’s all supposedly coming up roses, but women are more effected by it than they ever were and playing into that role. What I do is hold up a mirror up to people and break it really for them.”
The lyrical content of Queen Adreena is in places beautiful and consistently fascinating.  “That’s very kind of you,” replies a visually pleased and smiling Katie. “It’s not difficult at all. It just insists on coming out my mouth. I’d rather somebody shouted louder than me to quiet my own noise really. I mean that’s what playing live does, it just shuts the head noise down for a while. There’s so much noise from every angle it gives me a day off really once it strikes up and gets loud. It’s maintenance for me, it helps with survival. You’ve gotta put all that shit somewhere otherwise it turns into cancer.” Talking about how the lyrics and music intertwine to make the final product, Katie Jane says “Crispin can get terribly upset with me. A song like ‘Silent Undoing’ I just wrote it at home. I’ve got a little wind organ I write stuff on. I’m not a musician, I can play a couple of notes very easily and there’s some chord buttons. For me I always write off an atmosphere. I’ve got six chord buttons and there must so however many combinations of those six chords so I can find that atmosphere that’s drilling in my head for that particular moment. Atmosphere’s everything. Everything that comes out I see in pictures. I’m just interpreting pictures, like snapshots but it’s always very vivid, it’s very much got a black line around it. In a way I have a hotline to the unconscious. Pity me, it’s not the best thing to have and I can’t turn it off. But that’s just intellectualising it. We always try to find clever words to make sense of what we can’t make sense of.”   The live show is one forum where Queen Adreena leave the onlooker completely mesmerised. Talking of playing live, Katie Janes says “I’ll give you the most fantastic and obvious cliché. Things that are important to me are fucking, wine and playing music and that’s it really. This thing of reduction, it’s all been about getting out of the head and into the body so it beats the military drum and calls us to war, and let the war of the fucking psyche commence. Here we are, what else could I be doing that would be more fun?” With a notorious reputation for performance how important an element of your music do you feel performing is? “I’ve always known it’s a real privilege to take the stage, it’s a very highly charged thing to do cause it’s a very un-natural thing to do.” Do you think so? “Yeah! Why would anyone want to stand up in front of hundreds, hopefully thousands of people and almost beg them to tear one to pieces? Or on the flip side, when you catch the right side of the wave you can run up the sides of buildings and stuff like that, you capture a certain pure essence of something and that’s when magic happens. You step into a different realm. You walk through a door that’s not open very often, but you know you have to walk the knife-edge and be willing to throw yourself off the cliff, and that’s why I mean it’s very un-natural. ” Taking the stance that it’s un-natural to stand in front of thousands of people and perform, are there any particular messages you hope Queen Adreena convey to their audience? “You know I take absolutely no responsibility for how I’m received; it’s nothing to do with me. I have a profound sense of displacement, like I said before, witnessing rather that taking part. I’m desperate to take part. Maybe everybody feels that, but it’s really under the microscope in my case and I’m very very aware of it. I have absolutely no message. I write little stories and I put them like photographs around myself in order to believe that I exist, or challenge the idea that I exist at least and that’s the beginning and the end of it.”
Flicking through her copy of Black Velvet Katie spots a ‘My Vitriol’ interview and proceeds to reminisce about the band live and mentions her admiration of bassist Carolyn. Continuing to chat about music I ask if there is anything in the current climate of music that interests her. “I don’t listen. Things come my way and I’ll listen to them once, but the thing that really does it for me always is white noise and distortion. I’ll listen to a constant CD of the sea; I lived on a boat when I was a kid. But before that,” pointing into the corner of her dressing room, “even the noise of that fucking fan, I find it really… I find is so reassuring for some reason. The sound of any white noise, like a fan or running water. For me listening to that stuff is like looking in the mirror. There are so many different voices in there and frequencies and harmonics and they tell me what to sing. I don’t mean THEY the great THEY, or the spirits. Just within white noise. There’s just this whole spectrum of frequency and it is like anything, if you stare at it long enough you’ll find a reflection of yourself within it. There’s always a story waiting to be told in there. That’s what I love, the wind, the sea.”
And with that my time with Katie is over, feeling like seconds but transpiring to be minutes. With a gig in a sports theatre looming closer Queen Adreena seem as unsuited to play such a venue as much as the venue paints an unrealistic image of itself. The delicately spoken Katie Jane Garside is one of the most intelligently fascinating women in rock. Collecting up her bunch of flowers Katie proceeds to position them carefully one by one into her hair before returning to the rest of Queen Adreena. For a further insight into the band visit www.queenadreena.com We’re informed ‘Everything is not obvious… explore.’
0 notes