#while she ????? was never loved
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probably time for this story i guess but when i was a kid there was a summer that my brother was really into making smoothies and milkshakes. part of this was that we didn't have AC and couldn't afford to run fans all day so it was kind of important to get good at making Cool Down Concoctions.
we also had a patch of mint, and he had two impressionable little sisters who had the attitude of "fuck it, might as well."
at one point, for fun, this 16 year old boy with a dream in his eye and scientific fervor in heart just wanted to see how far one could push the idea of "vanilla mint smoothie". how much vanilla extract and how much mint can go into a blender before it truly is inedible.
the answer is 3 cups of vanilla extract, 1/2 cup milk alternative, and about 50 sprigs (not leaves, whole spring) of mint. add ice and the courage of a child. idk, it was summer and we were bored.
the word i would use to describe the feeling of drinking it would maybe be "violent" or perhaps, like. "triangular." my nose felt pristine. inhaling following the first sip was like trying to sculpt a new face. i was ensconced in a mesh of horror. it was something beyond taste. for years after, i assumed those commercials that said "this is how it feels to chew five gum" were referencing the exact experience of this singular viscous smoothie.
what's worse is that we knew our mother would hate that we wasted so much vanilla extract. so we had to make it worth it. we had to actually finish the drink. it wasn't "wasting" it if we actually drank it, right? we huddled around outside in the blistering sun, gagging and passing around a single green potion, shivering with disgust. each sip was transcendent, but in a sort of non-euclidean way. i think this is where i lost my binary gender. it eroded certain parts of me in an acidic gut ecology collapse.
here's the thing about love and trust: the next day my brother made a different shake, and i drank it without complaint. it's been like 15 years. he's now a genuinely skilled cook. sometimes one of the three of us will fuck up in the kitchen or find something horrible or make a terrible smoothie mistake and then we pass it to each other, single potion bottle, and we say try it it's delicious. it always smells disgusting. and then, cerimonious, we drink it together. because that's what family does.
#this is true#writeblr#warm up#relatedly for some reason one of our Favorite Jokes#amongst the Siblings#is like - ''this is so good u will love it''#while we are reacting to something we OBVIOUSLY find viscerally disgusting#like we will be actively retching and be like ''nooooo it's so good''#to the point that i sometimes get nervous if someone outside my family is like oh u should try it its good#(obvi we never force each other to eat anything. we are all just curious birds and#like. we're GONNA try the new thing.)#edit to answer why we had so much vanilla:#my mom is a very good cook and we LOVE to bake. so she just had a lot of staples in the house.#it's one of those things that's like. have u ever continuously thought ''ah i should get butter im probably out''#even tho u are not out of butter. so u end up with like 5 years of butter.#my mom would do that in a costco but like with vanilla extract#to be fair we WERE always using WAY TOO MUCH bc we were kids#so like she was right to stock up#ps. yes we were VERY sick after this lol i just didn't want to include it in the post in case ppl had an ick about that#u can tell it's real bc we knew "oh no we fucked up that's too much vanilla to waste'' but our reaction was to just. keep drinking it#> sibling understanding that vanilla extract isn't free > knowledge mother doesnt mind if we use it for milkshakes#> sibling choice to maybe get in a loophole of ''not wasting it'' if we drink it bc that's the same as using it (not throwing it out)#listen bud i was like 13 and my sister was like 9#when my mom discovered this we. got in. A LOT. of trouble. a lot of it. a LOT of it.#3rd edit bc i guess it isn't clear - i am 1 of my brother's 2 little sisters#i am the middle child#out of all the ways i have had to explain a post before being like ''did u forget a middle child can happen'' is my favorite
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listen there really was just something about how in the book, snow’s 3-page descent from hesitant lover boy to deluded mfer happens entirely in his mind. lucy gray gives him no indication whatsoever that she suspects him, that she’s going to leave or betray him. he’s just sitting quietly in the cabin waiting for her to return when that seed of calculated suspicion, which he has needed to survive the capitol, takes a hold of him and chokes the life out of any goodness left inside him. it really drives home your terror as a reader that “oh my god did he kill her? did she escape? what happened to her? why would he even think that?” in a way that when the movie had to adjust for visualization it lost some of that holy shit this guy has lost it emphasis.
#seeing some discourse and im not saying lucy grey didnt know#im saying she never dropped the kind of hints that she knew like she did in the movie#or if she did snow isnt worried about them until he very suddenly is consumed by them#snow is not concerned about whether or not she believed him. of course she did! hes snow!#but then shes gone…. for a while……#and its the sudden immediate drastic unravelling that comes across so clearly in the book#that i knew wouldn’t translate to screen yet still cant help but miss#the hunger games#coriolanus snow#tbosas#lucy gray baird#not a crime or anything just a note that i cannot stop thinking about#the ballad of songbirds and snakes#this is all from memory of reading it quite a while ago. so maybe 3 pages is an exaggeration#but i remember it happening VERY quickly and without much external cause#like we as the reader have no indication as to whether shes nearby or not.#snow has no idea either. he just SUSPECTS. and his suspicion breeds the hatred that has been bubbling inside him all this time#he hates how she undoes him. he hates that he WOULD run away with her if shed let him keep his secrets#and he HATES more than anything that she makes him WANT to tell his secrets#he wants to be vulnerable and reveal the ugly nasty parts about himself and still be loved#but he does not let himself and it is everyone’s downfall#he chooses cruelty bc it is easy and familiar and makes him feel more powerful than the vulnerable give and take that real love requires
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Scary Sunset.
I'm concepting things way outta order in this story, but I'm sure you can piece things together. Context is for a storybeat where, after defeating and capturing Adagio (thus having all three sirens in her possession), Sunset enacts her revenge plot to release the sirens on Canterlot as Thea discovers she's been manipulated. In a confrontation, the two scuffle and fight over the siren orbs while Sunset struggles with her conflicting wants and emotions.
#mlp#sunset shimmer#twilight sparkle#twiset#the orbs are the glass balls sunset carries on her back btw its in her cast line up art#deep down sunset hates thea. she was named “twilight” by celestia. the time of day succeeding sunset. she was always her replacement#but at this point in the story sunset's also fallen for thea. so it's also a conflict of wills in sunset. love or hatred.#hence the “don't make me do this” language. she's rationalizing her hatred and violence as thea forcing her hand and getting in her way#when in reality she doesn't need to do any of this. it's her last stand and outburst to cling to a life of revenge that she's grown too#fond of. because she knows thea has the power to change that and disrupt her identity as a pathetic victim who fell from glory#and that's scary. thea's a very scary thing to sunset because suddenly sunset wants something and to be someone new.#she suddenly wants to change. to be better for someone else. and she never thought or believed that could be an option for her#anyways toxic yuri yayyy#my art#the grand galloping 20s#character design#i hope i got across the pained conflicted emotions in sunset's face tho i belabored over them these past 3 days#i hope a look of anger and dissonance and guilt and “oh god i don't really wanna hurt you please just obey me” while trying to intimidate#is readable. if so it's all in the eyebrows babey
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i'm ready to try
#This drawing is kind of personal to me#I recently graduated (CUM LAUDE WOOOO!!!!) and its like. not to get depressing#but when i was younger i was never sure whether i would make it to this point#When i was going through what i consider to still be like. the worst time of my entire life#This fictional character was there for me and she was something for me to latch onto and cope with#eGem helped me a lot with being able to process my emotions at the time but also helped me to reflect on myself#which i think is a big reason as to why I'm really happy with where i am with myself right now#I'm going off to uni next school year to study astronomy!!! which!!!#Im also doing because of eGem!!! She ignited this kind of childlike wonder for space for me#I love doing math and physics and whilst Im still a bit scared because. honestly i don't know whether this is what i want to do with my lif#I think i'll be okay either way#either way i wanted to draw egem again even if i haven't done so in a while because its like#i think i wouldnt be who i am without her. i think i'd be a lot worse off#so like. thank you empires smp thank you geminitay thank you egem This drawing is me expressing my gratitude#AND THANK YOU AUTISM!#empires smp#empires smp s1#empiresblr#esmp#geminitay#art#fanart#alice.art#mcyt#mcytblr#song is andromeda by weyes blood... obv.. you guys know me by now :oP
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truth is, I used to dream about boys like you
jjk atla!au with @philosophiums
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#itafushi#fushiguro megumi#itadori yuuji#fanart#jjk fanart#jjk atla!au#atla!au: art#atla!au: illust#lmhs#timelapse#2.5 hours niCE#i mean its still 2am but it could be and has been worse#realized while looking at this tht this au has Vastly increased both my use of and love for the colour green#she will never dethrone red but she definitely gets the award fr most improved#megumi especially looks . sososo good in green which is unsurprising but i am surprised anyway#speaking of megu#i love th timelapse feature so much u get to see me fighting fr my life with yuuji fr like 20 minutes then get megumi first try#there's a reason i needed a ref sheet for yuuji and not megumi. drawing megu is like riding a bike fr me#like minor adjustments r inevitable but his overall face/hair/expression come so easily and i love him all the more for it#anyway#i could have sworn i used adonis fv lyrics for a caption before??? it was so long ago#i guess i must have changed my mind on tht other post bc adonis remains free real estate >:3#PLEASE listen 2 adonis fv........pls i beg.....pls it is so itfs coded.......#hina pleading fr someone anyone to listen to former vandal goes unanswered episode 542346 :(((
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you wonder why I'm bitter?
#ask hurtful questions get hurtful answers#what if irene got to see Teresa after she “came back"#ive always subscribed to the idea of Irene being quietly and bitterly in love with Teresa her whole life but never telling her#and giving Clare her remaining arm in what she thought would be a fatal decision as means to repent for surviving Teresa’s death#(survivors guilt)#while also passing off the responsibility of avenging her#she’s complicated...I have more in the tank I’m just saving it for future posts#irene claymore#claymore#claymore manga#quicksword irene#teresa claymore#teresa x irene#teresa of the faint smile#stillindigo art
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she’s like if the virgin mary smoked a pack of pall malls every day 🚬
#sims 4#the sims community#simblr#ts4#sims 4 edit#mysims#drawing/editing these tears took actual years off my life#editing this in general did but the tears were my hell#her name is norma jean named after her grandmother but she goes by either jeanie or jj#she works at the local convenience store and bartends at night when shes able to pick up shifts#shes the worst bartender in existence and refuses to lift anything over 2 pounds#she once convinced a customer to buy her a sweater because she looked a little cold while working#she lied and said her manager never lets them turn on the heat and casually mentioned pennys was selling her favorite sweater#and then described in detail exactly where the sweater was in the store#all she had to do was blink her big brown eyes and call them baby a few times and they immediately folded#she goes to church 7 days a week even though she hates it because that's what she did when her mom was still alive#and its one of the few things that helps her feel close to her mom#her mom died after she had to drop out of highschool to take care of her#she holds a lot of resentment for having to give up such a big part of her life#but at the same time blames herself for not being able to make her mom better#she doesnt believe in banks and hides money around her house to store it but she's also super forgetful#she'll randomly find money around the house and then treat herself like it was present she meant to leave for her future self#she loves crosswords but treats it like a fun game and refuses to check if her answers are ever right#there's ur fun little facts about jeanie 🫵🏼
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Baby Junior's First Steps (based on a scene from Bluey)
Prompt from my buddy @vadfannypack! Everyone thank them Right NoW!!
#tmnt#rottmnt#casey jones#casey jones jr#april o'neil#tmnt sunita#cassandra jones#don't call her Cass/Cassie#my art#I've never watched Bluey but I love how into it my friends are#anyways ermmm if anyone mentions the turtles vis-a-vis parenting Junior you're getting Blocked I'm not dealing with you#they help SURE but I SWEAR if another female character's development gets shafted in favor of a male character's I'm going to EXPLODE#Casey gets to be Junior's mom for a good while before she dies and you can pry that belief from my cold dead hands#I don’t play about curating my social media experience if I don’t like your vibe I don’t have to see you#anyways anyways yippeee adorable babu Juniorrrr I had a LOT of fun drawing these and almost died from cuteness aggression
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Lamb: Hurry and get dressed, I scheduled a talk therapy session for you and the other Bishops and it’s starting in ten minutes.
Narinder: IT IS THREE IN THE MORNING—
#Narinder notices his tail coming up in a happy posture when he sees it’s the Lamb who woke him up and has a crisis about it once she leaves#Anyhoo!#Lamb projects her fear of never reconciling with her family after they’re revived onto Narinder#while Narinder projects his need to seek power over and subjugate the people who wrong him onto her#they’re constantly avoiding their own problems by meddling with each other’s and we love to see it#anyhoo I forgot to post this and am going back to bed now. nighty-night y’all#better the wool au#narilamb#cult of the lamb#cotl narinder#cotl lamb#cotl
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au where everyone reunites as ghosts (michael is still alive) none of the afton siblings are happy
#ive actually had this au for a while now#i just never had enough motivation to draw fnaf#until now so!!#also elizabeth hates michael because he got evan killed#and she still hasnt forgiven him#i wish more people made her dislike michael ngl#i love the idea of michael loving his whole family#but his entire family hates him#</3
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Sketch dump :)
#the first one is indeed based from the doomed baseball au from nightow..#I planned on doing something nicer but hehe...wip wip. forever.#Most of these are just stuff I do sometimes and never post. I figured I should share them now#I'm going back to uni soon so. I will enjoy my last few hours of freedom#trigun#vash the stampede#trigun stampede#nicholas d wolfwood#vashwood#trigun fanart#vash#wolfwood#nicholas trigun#lenssi draws#meryl stryfe#trimax#meryl trimax#Meryl crumbs for me specifically bc while she is going through It Horribly I am very much in love with her messy hair#trigun eriks#eriks trigun#more bloody vash for the soul (sry bby)
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“What is honor compared to a woman's love? What is duty against the feel of a newborn son in your arms, [...] We are only human, and the gods have fashioned us for love. That is our great glory, and our great tragedy.”
— Maester Aemon Targaryen: "Game of Thrones"
#his insecurity was valid bitches 🤧#his only grasp on his inheritance used by low borns to tame lizards#but to ask if she'd never thought to have favored HIM#she had and she never regretted it#she never thought of him a bastard#rhaenyra loved that man#to have kept bringin more children#with his features#i am crying while i make this#house of the dragon#rhaenyra targaryen#rhaenyra x harwin#harwin strong#jacaerys targaryen#rhaewin#hotdedit#hotd season 2#hotd#asoiaf#asoifedit#jacaerys velaryon#The proof is here for all to see.#but she would not love you any less#when she is queen#she'll make a new rule#my gifs#but at what cost
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HELAENA WAS A BELOVED QUEEN IN F&B SO OF COURSE RYAN CONDOM HAS TO MAKE THE SMALLFOLK PRAISE THE PERSON WHO WAS BLOCKADING THEIR FOOD TO BEGIN WITH BC PROPAGANDA ONLY WORKS WHEN RHA EN YRA DOES IT AND THROW THE FOOD THEY WERE RIOTING OVER AT HELAENA. I CURSE HIM AND HIS UGLY WRITING.
#i hate condal so much#anti rhaenyra#anti ryan condal#anti hotd#hotd critical#helaena targaryen#pro team green#i am so tired of this ugly man using helaena only to showcase brutality#feminism but only if they're not greens#and like it never gets better for her and knowing condom he'll do the worst he can to her#anyway phia saban is a great actress and i loved alicent protecting her#i'm just so fucking sick of this man#also the one who went 'let them eat cake' while she ruled saves them with food condal you are#so intentionally malicious in your biases and i hate you#blood and cheese was totally forgotten#hotd spoilers#house of the dragon spoilers
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YELLOWJACKETS | 1.01 | 2.02 |
#jackie taylor#shauna shipman#*#jackie x shauna#jackieshauna#shauna x jackie#shaunajackie#yellowjackets#sophie nelisse#ella purnell#once again i ask you to walk with me here#this parallel just further proves in my little brain#the triangulation of desire of it all#shauna is hallucinating jackie leaning into her like she leans into jeff#it was never about jeff it will never be about jeff#sorry to that man.#and the knowledge that shauna was ???HORNY??? watching jackie and jeff???#the way it took jackie being dead for shauna to have that moment with her#to touch her like that etc#when in reality jackie would have fucking loved it while she was alive#idk just thinking. thoughts#parallels
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Yall i dont think im gonna be able to stop thinking about usha and g13, actually.
Ushas an old old woman, clueless with tech. Lived long enough to develop various bonds with a LOT of people and relies on them a lot for help. In turn, shes VERY loyal to her close conpanions (a great example would be how she tends to back paula up a LOT, the way she sets up russel and paula to 'fake date' wink and all). She's very warm and very emotionally intelligent even if she's a bit clueless sometimes. Her logic is borderline incomprehensible, but it has heart.
G13 on the other hand, is a hacking prodigy. Hes young, hes sought after for his skills for better and for worse. But in turn, he's essentially lost himself in the process. He may be able to scrape nuke codes, but he'll never make a friend. He lacks any loyalty for anyone and anything except for himself and his interests, and if they dont satisfy those two points, then its worth nothing to him. His logic may be sound, but its cold.
#val rambles#nsbu spoilers#never stop blowing up#dimension 20#usha rao#g13#okay ill black out and maybe think more about it again oops#anyway the conclution is that HE will be learning about the importance of la familia (threat)#i could make an addition to this. something about how despite these differences both of them have a level of percived lonliness.#something g13 is. VERY slowly starting to realize when he first sees doug#anyway following the idea that the cards favorite movies signify a degree of. what character arc ends up being#i genuinely think they WILL show him the power of la familia he isnout here trying ti takenover and suddenly BOOM familia beam (threat)#i love adding to the tags and NOT rebloging but. something something about how they push others away#where for usha it comes off as not wanting to burden others she trusts while for g13 its bc he flat out trusts no one#also episode 2 notes that usha also has a set of trust issues due to her reliance on people she DOES trust.
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sure jan.jpg
#tvedit#ropedit#userthing#userquel#userelenagilbert#tolkienedit#filmtvtoday#haladrielcentral#tropedit#cinemapix#userlysandra#haladrieledit#rings of power#otpsource#saurondrieledit#ringsofpowerdaily#otp: bind yourself to me#pavidaresque.gif#with the emphasis on “never..”#girl i love u but....#who r u trying to fool??#him or yourself??#is it me or her expression when she says “we never were”... why do i feel like she's enjoying everything while her words speak otherwise?#maybe that's bc she knows sauron is right???#hmmmmm
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