#while laptop is in repairs have this

[squadron-of-damned-writes]

Fic Stats Meme

Tagged by @ziskandra

Rules: give us the links to your fics with the most hits, second most kudos, third most comments, fourth most bookmarks, fifth most words, and fic with the fewest words.

Most hits: The Night In Gale - Good Omens (TV Series) and Supernatural fandom fusion, air conditioning observed by the Winchester brothers. 5739 hits, a statistical outlier in the popularity of my fics.

Second most kudos: The Original Feeling of Sharing - Dragon Age: Origins. Modern Girl In Thedas playthrough with a twist. Graphic Description Of Becoming A Golem. 110 kudos.

Third most comments: Unexpected Feeling of Sharing - Dragon Age: Inquisition. Continuation of the above, during DA:I. Raleigh Samson for Inquition Commander. 70 comments, 34 comment threads.

Fourth most bookmarks: Cosette Chapeau - Les Misérables. Javert adopts Cosette instead of Jean Valjean. 21 bookmarks. I need to finish this, it’s good.

Fifth most words: Lost in Translation- Ace Attorney Chronicles. Barok van Zieks & Ryuunosuke Naruhodou. Barok goes to Japan where he, among other things, learns kendo. 31299 words.

Fewest words: Observations of an Unconcerned Bus Driver. Stardew Valley. Farmer & Shane. Romance speederun slice of life. 159 words.

If you are comfortable with being tagged and haven’t done this yet… @you

[deus-ex-mona]

farewell, my idiot son…

[fleeblesim]

Born to play sims all day, forced to write essays for uni ✋️😩

[hellfyre]

ive been wondering why ive been coughing and feeling shitty the past several days and worried I was sick. but I think it was my partner's laptop battery swelling and possibly releasing toxic gases or smth bc once we took it to be disposed of we both started feeling a lot better 💀

[theskeletoninthegarden]

I'm taking a few days off for my birthday, I have some appointments, but otherwise I wasn't sure what I was going to do, until today when I decided to strip my laptops for fun parts

[sysig]

It's always something lol

Last year it was the charger, this year the hinge on my laptop broke

[sunny-m00n]

Drawing robots <3

(Ignore the giant space lol-)

[thestrangestwatermelonofall]

I open a tab. i type "how much does therapy cost"

Open a new tab. Type "how much does a nintendo switch cost"

[gurugirl]

Don't Judge a Book by Its Cover | shy dom!harry

*originally posted on Patreon but due to the use of the word daddy it had to be removed*

MAIN MASTERLIST

Summary: No one would ever know that your shy, quiet boyfriend likes to dominate you in bed every night.

A/N: This is an apology for not having mean king out this week! I've been stressed and busy and while I've got chapter 3 mostly ready I don't want to post til it's 100%. So enjoy this fun little taste of my shy dom!harry in the meantime! xoxo

Word Count: 2.8k

Warning: smut, sub/dom dynamics (Harry's degrading but also gives praise!), daddy kink, size kink (yes always size kink)

. .

When you first met Harry you never imagined the kind of person he was under the quiet shy-guy façade. You had brought your old laptop to him in hopes that he could fix it so you wouldn’t have to buy a new one. His small computer repair shop was highly recommended. And when you saw him, well, he was something out of a dream. Tall with tan skin and light green eyes, a soft smile, dark curls, and he appeared healthy and strong.

Except he was very shy. Quiet. You explained to him the issue with your laptop and he ran a cord up to the desk and plugged it in, typed something on your keyboard, bringing up a strange screen. You watched as he did whatever he was doing and wondered if this guy had ever been laid. You soon learned just how wrong that initial perception was.

“You spend a lot of time here?” You asked in hopes of striking up a conversation.

He scrunched his brows together and looked up at you. “Uh… yeah.” And then he looked back at your screen intently.

But you didn’t stop there. If there was one thing about you it was that you could be kind of relentless. You’d get something out of him one way or another.

And oh boy did you get it. After he told you what he thought he could do to repair your laptop and that he’d have to keep it for a few days you gave him your contact information so he could call you when it was ready. From there… it was kind of a whirlwind after you asked him to hang out a few times.

You knew you could be a bit bossy and direct and so it felt like a really good fit as you got to know him the few weeks after first meeting him. He didn’t seem to mind you making all the plans and telling him what to do and when you introduced him to a couple of friends you ran into at the park one day they also noticed how quiet he was too. He was polite, but he didn’t talk much so you commented to your friends that he was just shy right in front of him and that was the first time you noticed that look from Harry. A sharp glance that made the hairs prick up on your skin. You brushed it off but wondered if he maybe didn’t like you talking about him like that in front of him. Had he been embarrassed by that? You hadn’t said anything mean or untrue but there was something in the way he looked at you that gave you pause.

And that night was the first time you had sex with him. He followed you into your apartment when you expected him to just drop you off like all the other times you'd hung out with him before.

“Oh you’re coming inside?” You grinned at him and he remained quiet as he stalked behind you until you’d opened your door and Harry slammed it closed behind him.

The Harry you knew in public had suddenly been tucked deep down into some hidden pocket and this new brooding man stood before you with dark eyes and a smirk on his face. “Did you have fun bossing me around all day? Talking about me to your friends and laughing?”

You were stunned as he moved in toward you and both of his hands ran up the back of your neck and he titled your head back. “Well? Was that fun for you?”

Swallowing you let out a shocked laugh. “Uh… I mean… I didn’t like mean to hurt your feelings… I just thought…” Of course, you couldn’t find the exact feelings and words at that moment because this was a different man standing over you gripping the back of your neck.

“Can’t spit out your words, little brat? How unusual that you suddenly can’t yammer on. I’m gonna make this easy for you. Now, you do what I say and keep your mouth closed for once. I don’t want to hear you talking back to me anymore tonight.”

And even if you wanted to you wouldn’t have been able to. You were not only stunned into silence but half the time he had his cock down your throat making you gag around him as he praised you for being so quiet for him. You hadn’t expected any of it but you fucking loved it. When he made you pull his pants down and get on your knees the first sight you caught of his dick was something unbelievable. You hadn’t realized he was going to be so immense.

But he was and he taught you a lesson that night. And that was to not judge a book by its cover. Quiet and shy in public but once the doors were closed he was a caveman who liked to dominate and spank you, spit in your mouth, and fuck you until you were nothing but a puddle of mush and silence and serenity.

You were obsessed.

You still kept up your normal daytime appearances. You were the bossy, mouthy, and outgoing girlfriend to everyone who knew you and he was the compliant, quiet, and shy boyfriend. No one had a clue. They all thought you were the one wearing the pants in the relationship. And you did it in front of everyone. You told him what to do and often would order his meals for him and talk over him if he did speak.

But he was the one in charge the moment you two were alone.

And you knew you were in for it that day. You’d gone out with some friends again for lunch and you sat on his lap with your back to him and yapped loudly to your friends about whatever. You ate his sandwich and then laughed when you pretended to realize that he was still there. “Oh god! I almost forgot you were here, you’re so quiet, Harry! You’re like a piece of furniture!” Your girlfriends laughed with you.

You felt him pinch your thigh. And not a nice little teasing pinch. A bruising one that made you jump and you turned to look at him and there it was. That look. You bit your lip and turned back to your friends and continued being a bit of a brat. You knew he’d have something to say about you calling him a piece of furniture. You couldn’t wait to see what he might do.

And it should have come as no surprise to you that when you got to his house, he had you naked and gagged, on your hands and knees while he sat in his chair with his feet on your back like you were a fucking stool for his legs. Payback for the furniture comment.

Drool was falling from your mouth and pooling on his carpet as you tried to stay steady but the longer you stayed in your position the harder it became to not wobble, especially with the way he was shifting his legs around and crossing them over your back and shoulders.

“Pathetic,” he murmured when he saw the puddle of saliva on the floor. “But it sure is nice and quiet like this. Prefer it actually.”

He read in silence for what seemed like forever until you nearly fell over and he pulled you up and dragged you between his legs, keeping you on your knees. “Pull it out and suck.”

So you did. You looked up at him as you undid his pants and he pulled the damp handkerchief from your mouth.

The moment his length was freed from his boxers he had his hand on the back of your head and pushed you down until you were gargling and sputtering around him. You kept your hands over his thighs as he bucked up and sighed.

“Fuck… all this mouth is good for is sucking cock isn’t that right?”

You couldn’t answer. But you'd have said yes if you could've.

The zipper on his jeans was irritating your chin but you’d never complain. Your face was hot and you pulled breath in through your nostrils every time you were allowed to come up for air but he pushed you down over and over again until he was satisfied with how well you’d taken him and then brought you up to look at your face. “Look at what happens to you when Daddy’s cock gets stuffed in your mouth. Just a drooling baby with her eyes all crossed. Acts all tough and bossy all day with me but can barely make a peep when my dick is in her face.”

You moaned and reached for his dick, opening your lips but he wrapped a hand around your throat and pushed you back as he stood, pulling you up with him. “Open.”

You parted your mouth and stuck your tongue out with your head tilted back just before he spit into your mouth and you kept yourself still as he inspected. “Swallow.”

Gulping down his saliva you fluttered your eyes up at him before he pushed you over the arm of his chair with your ass up and began to spank you. You jolted at each strike to your bum but the smile on your face juxtaposed the sting his palm caused your backside.

“You know you can’t get away with being a brat. Daddy’s always gonna win in the end. But you love it don’t you? Love getting put in your place.”

Harry’s cock was still swollen and thick, hanging out of the front of his pants as he groped your plush bottom and spread your cheeks, spitting a glob of saliva over your ass hole and another over your pussy. You were angled just right for him. He loved it when you were draped over his chair like this. Could see your anus and your wet pussy and could do what he wanted with you.

You squirmed your hips gently and then felt the hot skin of his tip pressing into your cunt. The first dip in always stretching tight and achy around him. You let out a pitiful cry and heard him laughing behind you. “This is Daddy’s hole isn’t it?”

He drove into you, filling your insides with inches and inches of length and girth before backing and out plunging in again.

“It’s Daddy’s!” You moaned.

Another gob of spit was dripped over your anus and then you felt him push his thumb inside. “Yes, it is. And this one too, yeah?”

“Yesss…”

His chair creaked as he pounded into your guts and your moans were muffled into the fabric of the chair as he panted in pleasure.

You loved when he stuck a finger or two in your ass while he was fucking you. It kind of held you in place because he didn’t fuck your pussy gently. It helped ground you in a way.

“My bratty girl is so sweet and obedient right now. Just offers her little holes up to me and lets me have my way because she knows she’s been naughty all day. Laughing at me, pretending she didn’t know she was sitting in my lap, eating my food...”

He groaned when he ground in, swiveling his hips in circles and sliding his thumb in, and pulling it back slightly to put more pressure on your anus. Everything was wet. Soaked. And you could hear it with every thrust he made.

Suddenly he pulled his cock out and his fingers were gone and you whined when you felt him leave your body but he didn’t give you much reprieve when you felt his hands grasp your chin and lift your face up to look at him, standing over you with that dark smile.

He slapped his heavy, wet cock into your cheek and puffed out a laugh when he did it on the other side, your arousal getting smeared on your face. “Is this what you love? Daddy’s big cock in your face?”

You gulped. “Yes. Love your cock, Daddy.”

Keeping your eyes on him he smacked his length over your mouth, popping it past your lips before pressing his hands into your cheeks, his thumb on one side and fingers on the other. “Open.”

The moment your wet lips parted he dipped into your mouth, watching the way your jaw went slack and how your lips wrapped around him. He didn’t shove himself in too far, but just enough that it had your eyes watering as you struggled to keep looking up at him.

He cooed at you and as he rocked his hips in and used his free hand to land his palm down on your sore bottom again. Your ass was still up with your hips down over the arm of the chair and you blinked trying to clear your blurry eyes. “Taste that?” Another harsh smack to your bottom.

You moaned around his cock in response.

“That’s mine. Your pussy juice that makes a mess of my cock... Mine. This ass?” He slapped your bum making you jump. “Mine. This throat and this mouth? Mine.”

You gurgled when he pressed in, grazing just the beginning of your tonsils before slipping it back out to the tip. “Everything is mine. So keep that in mind next time you mouth off to me in front of your friends.”

He pulled his cock from your lips and you gasped a breath and watched him as he tilted your neck upward uncomfortably. “Now do you want to come?”

His fingers were still smushed into your cheeks as you let out a feeble yes.

“How bad do you want it?”

He loosened up his grip so you could respond. “Please. So bad, Daddy. So fucking much. I’ll do anything. Every bit of me is yours… You own me…”

He kept his expression unreadable as you continued. “I need you. I want you to make me come. Please, Daddy. You’re everything… I'm begging you, please… I worship the ground you walk on.”

You knew the drill. He expected to hear you grovel for your orgasm. Especially after the kind of display you put on earlier. He listened to you demean yourself and praise him, beg him…

When he released your face he grunted and you felt him behind you again, this time pressing his warm, sturdy chest into your back. “Good girl, Y/n…” He pressed his cock back inside of you, slicing your through to your tummy and spreading you open as he slowly thrust.

“You always learn your lesson don’t you, baby? Need Daddy and his big cock to make it better?”

You nodded and whimpered. The delicious feel of him opening you up and sliding in would never get old.

“I know you need me, baby. Daddy needs you too. Wants to make you happy and give you the whole world… Gonna let me have that orgasm now? Gonna show me what a good girl you’ve been for me?”

He shoved his hand under your hips and found your clit, making you cry out. He knew just what you needed.

Slow strokes of his long dick wetly opened you up, his balls pressing into your skin every time he bottomed out, his deep voice in your ear. “Come for Daddy. Give Daddy your orgasm like a big girl. Come on honey…”

His voice was tight and you knew he was beckoning you to come so he could come too.

“M’gonna come… thank you, Daddy!”

You unraveled around his cock, spasming and moaning, drooling into the seat of the chair as he rolled your clit between his fingers and fucked into you so deep you saw stars. But then you felt his cock pulse and throb and he pressed his lips to the skin behind your ear and he moaned deeply as he pumped into you, relief taking over both of you.

When he pulled out he kissed your shoulder blade and pulled his briefs up his strong legs and walked away from the chair as you watched him with a pounding heart. He put some music on and pulled a book from the shelf before returning to the chair and helped you up so you could sit in his lap and he could read to you.

Your shy, quiet boyfriend was the only one who got you. The only one who understood who you really were. Deep down you were just a soft and submissive girl who wanted someone to spank her, to tell her what to do and how to do it, and then to love her and read her books and tell her she was his best girl. No one else would ever have guessed.

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[cressidagrey]

Love in Bubblewrap

Pairing: Oscar Piastri x Felicity Leong-Piastri (Original Character)

Summary:   Felicity Piastri fixes things. Regardless of what they are. Even if they are her sister-in-law’s stolen K-Pop albums. 

Warnings and Notes: I came up with while taking a shower which means the idea is either genius or horrible. Inspired by Hattie Piastri's TikTok's about her stolen TxT albums. I have never once listened to K-Pop but I did my research (aka I googled names and song titles.)

Big thanks to @llirawolf , who listens to me ramble 😂

Group Chat: Piastri Fam ❤️

Hattie: WHOEVER BROKE INTO MY CAR I HOPE YOUR PILLOW IS ALWAYS WARM AND YOUR TOAST FALLS BUTTER-SIDE DOWN

Oscar: Hi to you too?

Edie: Wait. What.

Hattie: They SMASHED the driver window IN BROAD DAYLIGHT TO STEAL MY TXT ALBUMS MY ALBUMS, OSCAR. DO YOU UNDERSTAND.

Mae: Wait wait wait. They didn’t take your wallet? Just your K-pop?

Hattie: My wallet was in the glovebox. My laptop was in the boot. They took the bag with my photocard binders and albums. I HOPE THEY GET A PAPER CUT FROM YEONJUN’S EYELASHES

Chris: what is a txt album

Nicole: Chris. Not now.

Oscar: …How many albums are we talking?

Hattie: ALL OF THEM

Edie: OH MY GOD.

Mae: That’s criminal. That’s actually criminal.

Oscar: Yes. Because it is a crime.

Chris: did you call the police

Hattie: YES, DAD. They asked if there was anything of “significant personal value” missing and I almost cried telling the constable about my Soobin photocard collection.

Nicole: Oh, sweetheart 😢

Mae: Do you have any photos for insurance? Maybe we can file under collectibles?

Hattie: I had a spreadsheet. An ACTUAL spreadsheet.

Oscar: …you had a spreadsheet of your photocards?

Hattie: Yes. Because I’m an ORGANIZED YOUNG WOMAN WITH GOALS.

Edie:She learned it from Felicity.

Nicole: I’ll call the insurance tomorrow, Hattie. We’ll sort this out.

Chris: still don’t understand why they didn’t take your laptop

Mae: It was probably targeted. There’s a resale market for rare photocards.

Oscar: How do you know that.

Mae: I dabble.

Hattie: I’m going to manifest their downfall using a cursed Taehyun photocard.

Edie: You’re like a witch but with glitter and Spotify Premium.

Oscar: I’m begging someone to explain what a cursed photocard is.

Mae: It’s when someone once traded for it and got food poisoning the same day. It’s ✨infused✨.

Oscar: Okay. That’s enough internet for me today.

Chris: do you need me to fix the window

Hattie: Already booked a repair. I’m not mad about the glass. I’m mad about the betrayal.

Oscar: You make it sound like that Yeonjun guy broke into your car himself.

Hattie: He would never. Unlike SOME PEOPLE who’ve never even listened to “Blue Hour.”

Oscar: I’m not sure I even know what that is.

Edie: Uncultured.

Mae: Honestly embarrassed to share a last name with you.

Hattie: Just so everyone knows, the Spotify speaker I keep in my car still works. So if anyone wants to Venmo me emotional damages via new albums, I’ll accept.

Nicole: We’ll replace the ones we can, darling. One step at a time.

Chris: and next time don’t leave them in plain view

Hattie: They were in a tote bag under my raincoat WHAT DID THEY HAVE, X-RAY VISION AND A PERSONAL VENDETTA

Oscar: This chat is more intense than any strategy debrief I’ve had all season

Nicole: Let’s not joke. She’s upset.

Edie: We’re coping through humour, Mum.

***

Hattie wasn’t expecting a package.

She definitely wasn’t expecting that package.

It arrived two days after the break-in — dropped off by a courier who looked faintly intimidated, like whatever he was carrying had weight beyond the cardboard. Nicole opened the door, accepted the package and set it carefully on the kitchen bench like a letter bomb, then called up the stairs with the tone that meant your life is about to change, and not necessarily in a normal way.

“Hattie? Something came for you.”

Hattie padded downstairs in slippers and mild emotional ruin. Her window was still shattered. Her albums were still gone. Her Spotify had become a graveyard of songs she couldn’t listen to without hearing glass shatter.

So she wasn’t in the mood for mystery.

“It’s from Felicity,” Nicole said gently, handing it over.

That made Hattie pause.

The box was medium-sized. Not huge. Not heavy. But taped shut with a kind of efficiency that said I own a label maker and I’m not afraid to use it.

There was no note — just her name, written in neat, all-caps handwriting across the front like a letter. 

Hattie opened it.

And immediately had to sit down.

Inside were her albums. All of them. The exact editions. The pre-order bonuses. Even the Target exclusive one that took Hattie six weeks to hunt down the first time.

Each was sealed in a Ziploc bag, labeled with release year and version code.

She found her photocards next. Not her originals — those were gone — but a full curated set of the most likely pulls, alongside protective sleeves and one unmistakably fake (and glittery) Yeonjun card clearly drawn by Bee in crayon. It had a tiny heart in the corner.

There was also a pack of Tim Tams, two bubble tea vouchers, and a post-it note that read:

Didn’t have time to hex the thief properly. Settled for passive-aggressive online bulk ordering instead. Let me know if there is anything specific I missed. Love, F.

Hattie stared at it for a long moment.

Then sat down, quiet and stunned, and just breathed.

Because this was the thing about Felicity — she didn’t do things halfway. Didn’t stop at oh no, that’s awful. She solved the problem. Replaced what was lost. Quietly handed you love wrapped in bubble wrap and called it nothing at all.

And Hattie thought — not for the first time — how lucky they were.

How lucky Oscar was.

Because somehow her annoying, infuriating, brilliant brother had found a woman who was all quiet fire and sharp edges and spreadsheets and garden-grown tomatoes — and who loved him so fiercely, so completely, that she extended that love to all of his family without question.

And every so often, like this — like now — Hattie remembered that Oscar didn’t just fall in love with someone wonderful.

He chose someone who made everything better just by being in it.

She blinked down at the photocards again. Ran a thumb over Bee’s glittery artwork.

Grinned.

Then she looked at her phone and typed:

Hattie: I hope you know we all know we hit the absolute jackpot when Oscar found you. I don’t know how you did this. But thank you. Tell Bee her art is perfect.

Felicity responded a minute later.

Felicity: Tell her yourself — she wants to FaceTime you. Also I expect snacks next time you go to Korea.

***

Group Chat: Piastri Fam ❤️

Hattie: oscar. your wife just avenged the txt robbery with military precision. she replaced the ENTIRE collection. INCLUDING photocards.

Oscar: …she what wait what?

Nicole: It arrived this morning. I handed Hattie the package myself.

Hattie: AND SHE SENT TIM TAMS. AND A NOTE. AND SPARKLY ART FROM BEE. who, by the way, is now my favorite niece.

Oscar:She’s your only niece. 

Fliss didn’t tell me she did that i thought she was just quietly rage-baking sourdough

Mae: nah your wife was rage-sourcing Soobin photocards on eBay

Edie: this is so Felicity-coded subtle vengeance and laminated instructions

Hattie: you’re so lucky, Oscar. like genuinely. i hope you wake up every day and remember you bagged a genius wife who can fix a gearbox AND a broken heart.

Oscar: i do every single day

Chris: She really did all that? ...Remind me again why she married you?

Nicole: Christopher.

Oscar: no that’s fair actually

Mae: this is giving “he found her crying in the garden and offered her a leaf” romance energy

Edie: it’s giving “she’s the protagonist and he’s the golden retriever love interest”

Hattie: it’s giving “we are NEVER letting you mess this up”Oscar: i have no intention of ever messing this up but thank you for the terrifying support

[odysseys-blood]

i hope hp burns to the ground actually

[k9wa]

𑣲 RILE HIM UP ! ft BOOTHILL.

⠀ — your least favourite cyborg is brought back to you a mangled mess.

⠀ OR

⠀ — being boothill’s mechanic when you lowkey can’t stand each other.

⚠︎ sweet sweet tension, a little suggestive towards the end, gn reader (no referring pronouns), can they fuck already, this was ib by his lightcone, wc 1.9k

boothill's eyes flickered to life, emitting a faint glow of red as his systems began to reboot.

a pair of familiar red pupils met yours, two crosshairs fading into sight as boothill regained his sight and— to your dismay— consciousness.

as the cyborg regained his motion he attempted a step forward, only to realise he didn’t have the feet or legs to do so. the only thing keeping him powered on were some metal claws screwed into his back and a few loose cables connecting to your terminals.

“sugar plum,” boothill's scruffy voice cut through the silence. “do y'care to explain where my legs might’a run off to?”

you actually cocked an eyebrow. how the hell were you supposed to know? boothill was brought back to you in a mess of scraps and wiring— the damn hunk of metal was lucky you made him as blast proof as possible and he was left salvageable. 

“care to tell me how the hell you got this roughed up?”

you asked in turn, crouching down to look at the detached and ruined internals of boothill's torso where the stand-in wires were connected. you ran a finger carefully along the edge of his shredded metallic stomach.

“guess i didn't make you as smart as i thought. time for a newer model, maybe?”

boothill's eyes flickered down to his missing lower half, then to your hand that was more or less caressing him. it was amazing how much annoyance they could show in all their artificial glory.

“look who’s talkin.” the cowboy grumbled, pointy fangs poking out in an irritated grin. 

“how ‘bout, ‘gee, boothill! i’m real glad y’ain’t get blown to smithereens beyond repair!’” 

“it would've been less work for me if whoever blew you up finished the job.”

you sighed as you stood up, putting a hand lazily on your hip.

“how’d it happen?”

boothill bit back another argument with a gruff chuckle.

“some real cutie-pies i was huntin’ down had a lil’ more firepower than i expected. guess they didn’t appreciate me spoilin’ their party.”

boothill visibly cringed as his insult was substituted with some cutesy nickname mid explanation.

“and can you fix my beautiful synesthesia beacon already? this thing is drivin’ me up the wall.”

the request fell on deaf ears as your fingers typed something on your laptop, likely another string of code.

“you’re more concerned about your censor than how long it’s gonna take me to put your legs back on…” you sighed to yourself, still leaned over your workbench, eyes focused on your screen.

“i'm not touching it right now. you’re lucky i’m even letting you stay sentient after this.”

boothill snorted at the remark, brows furrowing in a steady grimace.

“well, ‘scuse me for wantin’ to speak freely–  i’m a grown man!” his pointy teeth shone as they peeked out again in a grin.

“y’know what? just leave yer lil’ tools and all the pieces there— i’ll get my legs back on myself. don’t need no charity work from the likes’a you.” he laughed. “heck, may even give myself a new pecker while i'm at it!”

the mechanic had half a mind to listen, sit back and watch boothill struggle to reassemble himself just to prove a point and simultaneously bask in his embarrassment when the former realised it wasn’t possible.

(not that he would’ve admitted defeat– you would have begrudgingly stepped in and helped before he inevitably messed up his wiring more.)

you stepped back over to boothill, hands moving to hold his cheeks so you could tilt his face side to side to check for any more damage.

“cool it, cowboy.” your eyes squinted in focus as they looked at boothill's, lightly tugging up on his eyelid to check for scratches or cracks.

“i'll get you back up and running, just lose the attitude already.”

boothill's eyes narrowed as he felt your touch on his face. the temperature difference of warm fingers on his cold, mechanical body stirring an oddity where his gut should have been. though he tried to ignore it, the sensation was there, clear as day against all his artificial nerve endings. 

“real easy for you to say,” he huffed, avoiding your eyes as he was examined like a broken toy. “let’s see how peachy you are when yer all strung up and legless, love muffin.”

that censor really was gonna drive him insane.

“just get it over with.'' boothill muttered in annoyance. “and try not t’fuss anythin’ up.”

it took quite some time, as expected, for you to successfully reattach boothill’s legs and fix his mangled midsection. when you were finally finished, you tugged out any leftover wires that connected boothill to your terminals and pushed back in your wheelie chair to beckon the cowboy forward. you pushed your glasses up to your forehead, some hair getting swept out of your eyes with them.

“feel fine?”

boothill rolled his ankles and bent his knees, giving his legs a good stretch to test their mobility.

“mighty fine,” he responded, satisfied to feel they were weighted and moved the same as before. “though i can’t say i’m lovin’ the breeze up my backside.” 

boothill glanced down at himself, steel body completely bare and lacking any of his signature clothing. 

“got my pants lyin’ around anywhere, sugar plum?”

you pointed to another table in the room, where boothills clothes— (or rather the new ones you had to go and get—) were neatly folded, his hat placed on top of them. 

boothill went to get himself dressed, hoisting up his bell bottomed pants and sliding on his jacket. he stole a glance in your direction every so often, resisting the childish urge to roll his eyes at the mere sight of you.

the artificial man hit a small bump in the road as he went to zip his jacket (could you really call it that with how little it covered?) up—  his fingers weren’t responding as well as they should have been. he could open and close his fist, but lacked the precision to pinch and hold the zipper.

“hey, honeybun,'' boothill called over to you with a furrowed brow. “didn’t i tell you not to go fudgin’ anythin’ up?”

you, in all your overtired glory groaned, turning around in your chair and waving boothill back over.

“what are you talking about?” 

“my cute lil’ fingers ain’t workin’ that’s what i’m talkin’ ‘bout!”

boothill's footsteps were clunky and loud as he stomped his way back over to his mechanic.

you reached for his hand, an uncharacteristic gentleness in your touch as you examined five mechanical fingers.

“make a fist,”

boothill obeyed, curling his fingers into his palm.

“open it,”

he obeyed again, letting them open and relax.

“hold up two fingers,”

boothill tried, but his fingers got stuck halfway into the motion, locking at the joints.

“son of a bitch.” you sighed, turning for one of your tools. “sit back down.”

boothill grumbled and went to hoist himself back onto the workbench.

“least one o’us can say it…” 

“do you want me to fix you or not?”

“i'm sittin’ ain’t i??”

you pulled boothill's shirt off his left shoulder and popped open a tiny panel on the curve of his neck, sliding your glasses back on to the bridge of your nose. with a lean forward you began carefully looking at a few thin wires that filled the space.

boothill tapped his fingers against the tabletop while you worked, that same oddity as before settling in his now repaired gut. he rarely got messed up enough for you and him to spend this much time together, or for you to have to really be in such close proximity.

it’s not uncomfortable, but the feeling is by no means familiar. it’s actually a little embarrassing– a galaxy ranger, a space cyborg and expert hunter, feeling almost flustered at some close contact like some kind of shy little girl.

“something the matter?”

boothill nearly jumped as you spoke up quietly to check on him, voice quiet and so close to his ear he had to refrain from leaning both closer and away.

“nah, everything’s just dandy.” boothill’s voice followed yours– quieter and a little softer as a result of the closeness.

“you’re sure?” you looked up from the small mess of wires, eyes glancing up at your cyborg over the rim of your glasses. “might as well fix anything else that’s bugging you while i’m here.”

boothill would have swallowed if he had the need to lubricate his throat. he shook his head, turning to look somewhere— anywhere else.

yours lingered on him, albeit briefly, observing the clench of his jaw and the way he tried to shift in his seat without being disruptive to your work. he didn’t see the little smirk tug at your lips as you refocused on the task at hand.

boothill’s cybernetic limbs felt almost human in their sensitivity, sending faux shivers up a spine he didn’t even have. the mechanics fingers running down his forearm are doing him no favours as they move to hold his hand again.

“close your fist…open it…two fingers up…”

each command was obeyed, ten gunmetal fingers finally holding up a little peace sign.

“that should be it, come see me if they start acting up again.”

you stood up, tentatively reaching out to fix boothill’s jacket and begin to zip it for him.

boothill didn’t protest the act, but it was…confusing, to say the least.

“reckon i’ll just start seein’ those auto bots again,” he leaned back on his palms as your fingers fixed his collar, straightening it out.  “much as i love our lil’ visits.”

you only hummed, smoothing out a few wrinkles and neatly tucking his scarf into it’s neckline, as he liked. “you could,” you mused, hooking your finger lightly into his collar and giving a gentle tug forward. “they don’t take as good care of you as i do, though.”

this time boothill caught the little smirk on your lips, clear as day and enough to make him question if short circuiting was possible.

you’re doing it on purpose, he knows. the careful touches to his hands and body against the sensors you put there, quiet voice leaving him with a frisson you made it possible for him to have.

boothill returned the smirk, albeit a little wobbly.

“you tryin’a rile me up, sugar plum?” 

he entertained you with a lean forward, two white crosshairs looking right at you while he considered if a hand on your waist was too forward or the perfect cornering move. 

“just like watching you squirm.”

you were gone as quickly as you’d arrived, finger unhooked and going to pick up his hat.

“but say i was,” you didn’t bother with a glance over as you made sure the brim was straight and unharmed. “i hardly have to try.” 

boothill hopped down from the table, following your path and offering a scruffy chuckle when you reached up to place it on his head.

“yeah? and what makes y’say that?” his hand found a place on his hip.

you didn’t respond— not verbally, anyway. a quick flick of your eyes downwards was all he received. 

so he followed, looking down as well, to the very appendage he had insisted you give him over and over again pushing against his trousers. 

his own dream, now his downfall. 

boothill pushed passed you, pushing his hat further down onto his head while he stomped away. the profanities that left his lips filled the air— or rather their replacements. something something i love you blah blah peach cobbler something cutie-pie or meow!

“remind me t’settle for them lovely auto bots next time!”

he opened the door with a firm kick of his boot, stomping out with a scowl. 

as if he wouldn’t be back. you took better care of him, after all.

⠀ 𑣲 MASTERLIST / GOT A REQUEST ?

[henpeckedho]

Boring life update:

After looking at all the options in the budget phone range, I'm just going with the newest version of the phone I have.

While a "nicer" phone would be good, the reviews from other long time moto g fans say the same thing--2023 is a huge improvement over the other ones in this line but you can still drop your phone with abandon and have it be okay.

My phone requirements are: basic internet and the ability to drop my phone an average of 3 times a day for 3 straight years and still have it function. I AM the intended original Nokia user. And moto g delivers on that kind of durability. So, basic budget phone it is!

[jakesimfromstatefarm]

──── YOURS . ↳ one shot // also part of the no doubt series !

✎ᝰ .ᐟ aka everything you're wearing is his, but yet, he's the adorable one

── sim jaeyun x f!reader ౨ৎ wc. 914 ⌗ fluff fluff fluff, crack, banter

↳ IMPORTANT NOTE .ᐟ ── this is part of my no doubt series ─ a sequel series of short drabbles that take place after the events of my fic no doubt, and show jake & reader's relationship throughout their first year together (& how jake wins her trust & love back hehe) ── THIS CAN BE READ AS A ONE-SHOT, however, there will be some easter eggs if you've read no doubt before!

↳ addie's ✉ .ᐟ ── the first part of the no doubt series! keeping it short, sweet, & SIMPle for the first one (emphasis on the simp bc jake really is one for y/n) im so so so obsessed with this jake pls

It’s raining.

Not the dramatic, down-pouring, confess-your-love-in-the-rain-moment type of rain.

But just a soft drizzle—enough to send people scurrying home and definitely still enough to wet your clothes and damage your belongings…(you’re learning this the hard way). 

The sleeves of your hoodie (read: Jake’s hoodie because, technically, he let you borrow it once so, naturally, he never got it back) are damp at the ends, your phone is hanging on for its dear life at three percent, and your last bus home? 

Just left. 

So, yeah.

You’re kind of screwed. 

You tuck your hands into your sleeves, pull your hood up, and pray you bought laptop insurance that will cover the costly repairs of a water-damaged computer, and begin to accept your wet fate when—

Screech. 

A car pulls up right in front of you.

Not just any car. 

Familiar.

Black. 

And very, very, dramatic. 

The window rolls down. 

“You forgot an umbrella?” 

Jake is looking at you with an exasperated look that says you just personally insulted him.

“I literally told you it was going to rain today. You’re going to get sick, and somehow, it’s gonna be my fault.” 

His hair is a little messy—like he rushed here (he did).

He’s still in his sweats—like he didn’t even change before getting in the car (he didn’t).

Your stomach flips at the sight.  

“How did you—”

“You texted me that you were at the café,” he says, like it’s obvious. “And I know you only ever go to this café, so I checked their hours. They close at six. It’s 6:27, and you never texted me that you got home.” 

You blink.

Your heart flutters dangerously. 

You open your mouth. Then close it. Then open again. 

“You were…keeping track?”

Jake scoffs, “Of course I was keeping track. Who else is gonna make sure you don’t, I don’t know, get kidnapped or something?”

You snort, making your way around to the other side of the car, “Dramatic, much?”

Jake ignores you, reaching over the console to push open the passenger door, “Get in before I lose my mind.”

You bite back your growing smile as you slide into the seat, immediately engulfed by the warm heater blasting and the smell of his cologne lingering in the air. The second your door closes, Jake is already reaching over into the backseat, muttering endlessly to himself about the very, very real possibility of adult kidnap and how you never know if—

A towel lands onto your lap. 

You freeze, blinking at the soft material, then back up at Jake.. 

“...Did you just…have this ready?” 

Jake blinks back at you as if caught guilty. His ears are pink.

You think he’s the cutest being in this entire world. 

“Just dry off, please,” he mutters. 

You giggle softly, patting down your hair with the towel, “What, no hot chocolate to warm me up while you’re at it?” 

Jake exhales, and tilts his head back dramatically against his seat, his eyes landing on you. 

“Y/N, if you dry up properly for me, I will literally drive you to any store right now and buy you every single hot chocolate flavor you want.” 

You pause. A slow smile grows. 

“Even the expensive imported kind from Germany that you think is too sweet and too thick?” 

“Y/N.”

You start laughing, the sound breathless and literally music to his ears, still toweling off, when—

A new weight suddenly settles over your shoulders.

You glance down.

Jake’s jacket.

It’s warm.

And it smells like him.. 

Jake turns back towards the steering wheel and shifts the car’s gears, aggressively pretending like he didn’t just casually ruin you with such a simple move. 

Your heart is pounding.

You glance down at the fabric, then up at Jake. 

His hands are gripping the wheel a little too tight. His leg is bouncing slightly. His jaw is clenched and his eyes are focused on the road ahead of him. Too focused. 

Like he’s nervous.

A small smile teases at your lips. Your fingers toy at the edges of his jacket. 

“You’re adorable, you know that?” you murmur.

Jake lets out a quiet laugh, avoiding your gaze, “You say that as if you’re not literally sitting there wearing everything that’s mine, and I’m the adorable one?” 

You huff, rolling your eyes as you shift in your seat, facing him fully, “You also know you don’t have to keep doing all this, right? The little gestures? Proving yourself to me?” 

At that, he finally turns to look at you as the car rolls to a stop at a red light.

His eyes are warm. Soft—twinkling with something unspoken, yet impossible to deny.

"Y/N," he mumbles, his free hand reaching over, wrapping gently around yours. His thumb brushes over your skin, softly, slowly, deliberate. "I'm not trying to prove anything. I just care about you. That's it. That's all."

Your breath catches slightly.

And then—he gives you that small, lopsided smile. The one you've seen a million times before, except now, it feels different.

Like it's always been meant for you in a way it never has before.

“But," he adds, voice steady. “If I do have to prove it to you every single day, I will."

Your fingers tighten around his.

God, you’re so doomed.

Jake’s expression softens even more before he turns back to the road, adding casually, “Even if it means saving you from catching a deadly cold or getting kidnapped in broad daylight.” 

You let out a snort, rolling your eyes. 

“I hate you.” 

He grins.

“No, you don’t.” 

Then, without thinking, you lean over and press a soft kiss to his shoulder, your words mumbled into the material of his sweatshirt.

“Thank you, Jakey.” 

Jake grins even wider, like he just won the lottery.

And honestly?

He definitely did.

no doubt m. list || next >>

tag list! (open ! // bolded couldn't be added!) @bluxjun @ki2rins @why-did-i-just-do-this @favoritten @lovialymisc @xylatox @vivimura @leehsngs @puma-riki @lezzleeferguson-120 @enhaprettystars @laurradoesloveu @sievenderz @somuchdard @kristynaah @hinryh @ltfirecracker @lov4hoon @fangirl125reader @0429jw @dreamy-carat @yuons @thestarinstarbucks @miszes @llearlert @ppeachyttae @hoomin10 @teddybeartaetae @tanisha2060 @therealmrsbahng @beomgyu-bears @ikeulove @jiyeons-closet

[unhingedandroidwoman]

To be a robot sat down for routine maintenance by your partner. Immobilized from the neck down for the procedure but still able to feel every screw taken, every panel shifted, and every wire moved.

Eventually they plug in their laptop and run a program to make you feel warm and fuzzy and giggly like laughing gas while they perform more dangerous and intimate repairs.

The inebriation and the touch of their love together sends waves of enjoyment through your body, unable to squirm and writhe in bliss. You can feel their code running through you like a burning poison, but you love it. You love them. You love this.

They tug on a few wires harder than they should have, not like you would have noticed. They coo and call you a good machine but you can hardly process it with how amazing this all feels. God they're just so beautiful, so much so that you don't even notice them running their fingers along your chassis with a look of hunger that always makes you squirm.

You're at their mercy, and by stars it is all you've ever wanted.

[shinig6mis]

you never should've clicked that link.

but curiosity had its claws in you, and that night, while you were alone in your dimly lit room, you let it win. just a quick look, just to see what was really lurking on the dark web. that's what you told yourself.

one wrong click and your screen glitched. blacked out for half a second. then a text box popped up with white letters against a pitch-black background.

???: cute pajamas

your breath caught in your throat. the cursor blinked, waiting. you didn’t type anything or move at all. you simply stared as your heart hammered against your chest. your fingers twitched toward the laptop lid.

another message.

???: go ahead and close it

???: i’ll still be here

your skin prickled. and then, at the top of your screen, you noticed the tiny, glowing green dot. the camera light.

without thinking, you slammed your laptop shut so fast it nearly slid off your desk. scrambled back, stomach twisting. no way. no fucking way.

on the next day, you took your laptop to a repair shop. paid extra to have it cleaned, reset, scrubbed of whatever digital parasite had burrowed into it. but then the guy behind the counter just frowned, clicking through your system. “there’s nothing here,” he said. “no malware, no viruses. your laptop’s clean.”

all that really needed to be repaired was the tiny crack on your screen after you shut it so fast.

tomura was bored.

he had planned to fuck with you, that was all.

another dumbass poking around where they shouldn’t, clicking shit they know they're not supposed to. he almost closed out after the first few days of watching.

that was until you started talking to yourself when you were alone, making little noises when you stretched, humming under your breath while working on assignments. the way you’d pause videos to read comments, or sit cross-legged in bed while scrolling on your phone.

it was stupid. pointless, really.

but for some reason, it was hard to look away.

so he didn’t.

he watched you like a habit he couldn’t quit.

and eventually, you started leaving your laptop open more often. but the paranoia still lingered, coiling in your stomach when you were alone too long. that feeling of being watched never really went away.

a couple nights later, your screen lit up again on its own.

there it was again.

???: how long r u gonna keep ignoring me?

you glared at the webcam, hoping he could feel it through the screen, as your fingers hovered over the keyboard and typed.

y/n: how long are you gonna keep watching me, creep?

tomura laughed at that.

???: so she does talk

what the fuck was going on right now? your hands were sweating. you wiped them on your thighs, forced yourself to keep your eyes narrowed at him.

if he could still message you, still access your screen, then he knew everything. your files, your passwords, your location.

the realization sent a cold shiver down your spine.

y/n: what do you want?

this time, the reply was almost instant.

???: already got what i want

tomura wasn’t sure what exactly had changed. watching had been enough, at first. knowing he could listen in on your rambles, see the way you chewed your lip while concentrating on a homework, the absent-minded way you twirled a strand of hair when you were bored—it was all pretty amusing.

but he wanted more.

you fascinated him. the way you blushed when you saw a cringey scene in a show, the way your brows knitted when you felt troubled. all your unfiltered reactions.

people were so fake, so performative, but you—alone in your space, forgetting he was right there—you just felt so real and right to him.

and while tomura has seen plenty of people, it was rare for him to actually see the real version of someone and continue to grow attracted to them.

he wanted to see you up close. wanted to make you react to him.

it was a crowded café near campus. you had been staring out the window absently, hands wrapped around your drink as your eyes focused on whatever reading you were trying to dissect on your laptop.

you looked so at peace that tomura almost didn't want to ruin the moment for you.

but he couldn't help it as he lifted his phone and typed on his screen.

your device buzzed with one new message.

???: found you

author’s note ♪ 　 ͙ㅤ 　(՞ ܸ. .ܸ՞) i love my boy tomura so bad yall don’t understand :< p.s. honestly can’t remember when i wrote this ?? i just found it in my drafts ermmmm…

© 2025 shinig6mis | do not plagiarize, repost, or translate any of my work.