#the friends are all just. so. friend-shaped. though… i like the sandwich pal. he has priorities.

[deus-ex-mona]

farewell, my idiot son…

[ilovefandoms102]

Part 11- Shape of My Heart

Pairing: Rudy Pankow x Plus Size Reader

Summary: Falling in love with someone you can never have is the worst feeling in the world...

Taglist:

@jeyramarie @drewswannabegirl @sexualparkour @teamnick @jiaraendgame @agirlwholovescoffee @outerbongs @jaxxandcomet @velyssaraptor @baby-pogue @they-write-once-in-a-blue-moon @must-be-a-weasley-92 @kaitieskidmore1 @ma10427 @ifilwtmfc @lasnaro @justcallmesams​ @judayyyw​ @lonely-kermit​ @gviosca​ @iamaunicorn4704​ @jellyfishbeansontoast​ @fernweh-fangirl​ @runway-to-my-aid​ @eb15​ @hurricane-abigail​ @tangledinsparkles​ @fandom-phaser​ @sunwardsss​ @http-cherries​ @bibliophilewednesday​ @evaporatedrosepetals​ @thetomatosaucee​ @tomatosauceagent​ @redosmo​ @ilikealotofpeople-younotsomuch​ @obx-direction-sos​ @mxltifandoms06​ @kindahavefeelingskindaheartless​

Part 10 Part 12

Note: After crying over the last chapter, I was finally able to muster up this one. Also just in case anyone was wondering, we’re pretending COVID19 is nonexistent in this story because it would just ruin everything and I’m not about it!

=============================

It’s been a month and a half since Rudy told me about his short film, our conversations became less frequent which worried me deeply...

I didn’t want to drift apart from him, and that’s exactly what I feared was happening now. I tried to indulge into my school work, but it became harder to focus when I kept checking to see if I had a text or at least a SnapChat from him. I didn’t want to bother him by blowing up his phone either, becoming an annoyance he’d soon grow tired of. I expressed my concerns to both Maddie’s on our daily FaceTime call, hoping to get some reassurance for my MIA boyfriend.

“We’ve been in a lot of meetings with Jonas and Netflix to try and get season 2 of OBX approved, I don’t even know why we have to be there because they don’t really talk to us.” Maddi B commented.

“Plus Rudy has that short film on top of everything, so I imagine all of this is taking up his time. Don’t fret though, he said in our last meeting how horrible he felt that you all couldn’t talk as much with the both of you being so busy. He talks about you to everyone and how much he misses you.” Maddie C inputed.

“Awww, he’s so sweet. Maybe I am overthinking things, when I go to work tomorrow I’m demanding a week paid vacation because I need a break. Midterms are coming up and I’ve barely had any time to study.” I sighed.

“You need to focus on school, that’s the most important thing right now. You know Rudy would say the same, you need to take that week to relax and get everything in order.” Maddie B pointed out. 

“Yeah you’re right, jesus I forgot I have to fucking close at work tonight. I’m going to start applying to different places that actually care about their employees, and will work with school schedules.” I huffed, swinging my legs off of my bed.

“We’ll let you go then babe, love you!” Maddie B called, waving in the camera.

“Love you y/n!” Maddie C said, blowing a kiss in the camera.

“I love and miss you guys, I’ll see you later.” I smiled, hanging up.

=================================

Work was awful, being a shift manager was not all it was out to be. I hated dealing with difficult people and sometimes the other employees. I had just finished have a shouting match with this lady who was down right insulting both me and the other cashier working. I was so glad to be locking up once we closed, practically sprinting to my car, I was stopped by the cashier I had worked with tonight.

“Hey y/n, I-I was wondering you know if um..” he said.

Shit, I knew where this was going...

“Maybe we could hang out some time, I think you’re really pretty and uh...yeah I think we should get together more.” he spoke.

“That’s nice and all pal, but she has a boyfriend.” was heard from behind us.

I froze in my spot, tears coming to my eyes. I whipped around to see Rudy leaning against my car, his blue eyes zeroing in on the guy. He scurried off, leaving just Rudy and I.

“Hi baby,” Rudy spoke, a smile so wide on his face.

He looked different, having grown a mustache and slight beard. His hair was longer too, but still handsome as ever. I let out a watery laugh once I was out of my trance, blinking to make sure I wasn’t hallucinating. I dropped my stuff in front of my car, throwing myself in his arms.

“Oh my god, are you real? Are you really here?” I blubbered, pulling back to hold his face. He held me tight against him, combing some stray hair from my face.

“I’m here, you’re even more beautiful than I remember.” he gushed, beaming as he laid his forehead to mine.

“I look like shit Ru, I don’t even have makeup on.” I giggled, feeling his facial hair under my fingertips.

“You don’t need it, fuck I’m so happy to see you. I’m sorry we haven’t talked much, I’ve been so busy in meetings and filming.” he sighed, shaking his head.

“You came just at the right time, I have a whole week off of work.” I said, both of us grinning wide.

“Plenty of time for you to show me around then.” he smiled.

Rudy gripped my face in his hands, crushing his lips to mine. I had craved them for so long, having been deprived of the feeling. My heart went soaring, the feel of his facial hair tickling my skin. He moaned into my mouth, his hands moving to hold my hips to bring me closer. My fingers weaved their way into his now long blonde hair, tugging at the roots slightly. 

I pulled away once I became dizzy, pulling my hands back to caress his face. He gave me little kisses all over my face, fully caging me against him so I couldn’t move away. Rudy laughed along with me, pulling back fully now.

“Guess you’ll be my chauffeur for the week babe.” he smirked, opening my door for me.

I chuckled as I got in my car, Rudy jogging to the passenger side. He held my hand for the drive to my apartment, pulling it to his lips to kiss the back of it. We jammed out to some of our favorite songs, dancing crazy. I had the windows down so we could blast my speakers, probably waking everyone in the neighborhood up. Rudy even pulled out his phone to record us rapping Ice Ice Baby by Vanilla Ice, he got embarrassed after the first chorus though because that was the only part he knew and I was still going.

“Ok show off, trying to outshine me on my own Insta story.” he scoffed teasingly.

“Not my fault you don’t know the lyrical poet Ru,” I joked, sticking my tongue out at him. 

===================================

I threw my bag on the end table as soon as we walked into the apartment, Rudy taking a walk around. He picked up pictures, looked at my bookcase, and even pulled out some of the books I had to skim through. I sat on my couch to flip through some movies for us to watch, not wanting to miss a single moment spending time with him. Rudy walked into my kitchen, opening my cabinets, and my fridge. 

“Baby, why don’t you have anything to like eat or drink?” he called from the kitchen.

“I uh...I couldn’t afford to go to the store this payday. I had to pay my rent and my car payment which is basically my whole check, and the rest is for gas to school and work.” I murmured, knowing he was going to be upset with me.

“So like...what do you eat then?” he asked, peaking his head around to look at me.

I stared at the floor, chewing on the inside of my cheek. I could feel his anger radiating off of him, the tension in the room becoming nerve wracking. I was a poor college student ok, I didn’t have the luxury of my parents buying my way through it. I was lucky some nights to even have stuff to make a fucking cheese sandwich.

“I...I don’t.” I confessed, hearing a sharp scoff come from Rudy.

“Get your shoes back on.” he demanded, snatching my keys.

“Wha-...Where are we going?” I questioned.

“This shit isn’t going to continue, not on my watch. I am seriously pissed you didn’t tell me this.” he snapped, taking me aback for a moment.

“It’s not that big of a deal, you’re being over dramatic! It makes me lose weight so what’s the fucking problem?!” I yelled, Rudy whipped his head around, his mouth hanging open.

“The fucking problem is that I’m not going to sit here and watch my girlfriend struggle when I can help. Let me help you and stop being so stubborn. If you want to lose weight for you then that’s fine, but I don’t want you to have it in your head that you need to do it for me. You’re perfect to me.” he stated, earning an eye roll from me. 

“Alright Ru, let’s get this over with.” I sighed, secretly melting at how sweet and thoughtful he is. 

===============================

Goofing off in the store was all fun in games until I saw him..

Nick.

The guy that shredded my heart, still yet to be fixed. The guy that messed me up so bad I never thought I was deserving of love until Rudy came into my life. Rudy was in the middle of talking to me when I abruptly spun around and high tailed it out of the aisle. 

“What’s wrong?” Rudy asked as soon as he caught up to me. 

“We need to leave.” I declared.

“Babe, we haven’t even made it through half the store I-” he spoke.

“Hey y/n, long time no see.” someone said, my blood turning to ice. I turned around to see Nick with some of his friends, smirking at me. 

“Um..” I stuttered.

“Who’s blondie?” Nick scoffed, pointing at Rudy. 

“I’m her boyfriend.” Rudy said, glancing between the two of you. He must have put the pieces together from the very uncomfortable expression on my face.

“Boyfriend? Really y/n? You’re so desperate you hired someone to be your boyfriend? Pathetic really...” he laughed, his friends joining. I just wanted to ground to swallow me whole, I had to turn my head so they didn’t get the satisfaction of seeing me cry.

“You’re Nick, the piece of shit who thinks he can just toy with women how he pleases.” Rudy concluded.

“Guilty, y/n and I had a good run didn’t we?” Nick commented, going to touch my shoulder.

“You lay one finger on her and I swear to god you’ll regret it.” Rudy said, his voice going an octave lower. 

“Oh please man, you seriously don’t have to keep your act up. How much is she paying you?” Nick asked, tilting his head.

“Not that it’s any of your business, but this isn’t an act.” Rudy hissed.

“Guys that look like us man don’t go for fat chicks.” Nick chuckled.

“The fuck did you just say?” Rudy bellowed, getting in Nick’s face. I had to intervene now, I couldn’t risk a fight in the middle of the store.

“Rudy please, he’s not worth it.” I said, tugging on his sleeve.

“Nice seeing you again y/n, remember what I said last time we spoke.” Nick cackled, leaving with his posse.

“What did that fucker say to you?” Rudy inquired, his chest heaving with anger.

“I’ll tell you when we get back, let’s just go to a different store.” I offered, checking out whatever we had in hand before heading to the car.

================================

Rudy spent way more than I told him he could, but I wasn’t surprised he didn’t listen to me. It took us four trips to carry in all the stuff we bought, I’m sure I’d be stocked up for a year now. I was seriously exhausted, and my mood hadn’t gotten any better since our run in with Nick. Rudy had tried to cheer me up, but I think he knew that my mood wouldn’t be saved tonight.

I planned on taking a quick shower, but I couldn’t stop my mind running through my past. My chest started to burn, my hand came over my mouth to conceal my sobs. I had hoped the water would drown out my cries, but Rudy still heard them. He shed his clothes and jumped in the shower, taking me in his arms. I leaned my head on his chest as I sobbed, his lips moving to kiss my wet hair. 

“I don’t understand! What did I ever do to deserve that!? I did everything for him! I was some sick game our whole relationship, how fucked up is that?” I laughed humorlessly.

“What did he say to you?” he inquired.

“He told me that I would never find someone to love me, that I was undeserving of love, and that I was the ugliest being on this Earth who was stupid to think I ever stood a chance with him.” I recalled.

“That’s fucked up, you should have let me beat his ass.” Rudy muttered, switching places with me so he could wash his hair.

“He’ll get his karma one day, someone will shred his heart beyond repair just like he did mine.” I whispered.

“I’ll have the best time repairing it then,” Rudy shrugged, leaning to plant a sweet kiss to my lips.

“Are you sure you want to go through that Rudy, I-I’m not...I’m not as happy go lucky as everyone thinks I am, I’m broken deep on the inside.” I said, shaking my head as I looked down to the tile.

“I wouldn’t of chased after you if I didn’t want all of you.” he spoke, tilting my chin up.

“Well I guess so but-” I started.

“It’s you and me against the world, no one will ever compare to you y/n.” he inputted. 

I kissed him hard, a moan leaving his lips. He pinned me against the wall, showing me exactly what I meant to him....

[hellofaer]

sugar daddy! mario x cat boy! @shinsouplays

(not proofread)

mario used to have a happy life. keywords used to. he missed his best friend for life, luigi, who literally got scared to death. mario had told him he was concerned about his obsession with the haunted mansion but luigi just didn’t listen. his companion yoshi mysteriously disappeared after a big argument with his girlfriend at the time birdo. toad and toadette were tired of being in the kingdom all the time which resulted in them running away together. Mario missed all of them, but who did he miss the most? his wife- well, ex wife peach. he thought everything they had was genuine. until he found out that she was sleeping another man- that man was bowser. apparently peach was too scared to reject mario and was seeing a man in a lizard costume behind his back. she had used the “kidnappings” as an excuse. and he believed it. once he found out about her backstabbing he banished her from the kingdom, never to be seen again. he didn’t want to do it, because deep down in his heart the fire still burned aflame for her. but he knew he had to let her go, so he did. mario spent his time dwelling in the kingdom, a lot of the time being seen either crying or eating a lot of comfort meals. but because toad and toadette ran away, no one was there to check up on him. except for his old friend waluagi. it had been years since waluagi had seen his old pal and wanted to check up on him.

little did he know, that call would change his friends life.

brrrring! brrring! brrring!

mario ignored the ringing, his face smooshed down into his dirty pillow. he had cried the night before again, and felt absolutely no energy to pick it up. until it rang once more.

brrrring! brrring! brrring! brrr-

mario fiercely grabbed his phone and answered it without looking at the caller id.

“what the hell do you want?” mario asked in an annoyed tone. no one ever called him, why now?

it was silent for a moment and mario was about to hang up before he heard a gruff voice from the phone. “ah, hello? hello? is this, er, mario?” the gruff voice asked. wait a minute. mario recognized that voice. “WALUAGI?” he asked in surprised, sitting straight up so the blankets uncovered his hairy chest. again, no one had ever called him. he thought waluigi retired and lived at a nursing home.

a loud laugh erupted from the phone, causing mario to slightly pull the phone away from his big ass ear. “yeah! mario, how’s it goin? haven’t seen you, since.. er, the uh, peach days.” waluigi said, the enthusiasm in his voice going down at the end. even though mario was still sensitive about that topic, he was focused on his old pal calling him after years of no contact. he cleared his throat awkwardly. “er, yeah, i think so.” he said with a fake chuckle. “Why don’t i stop by the kingdom so we could chat huh? bring some of your favorite pasta, how about that?” waluigi suggested. he wanted to see how mario turned out honestly. people always spread rumors about how mario let himself go and became a downer but waluigi wanted to see that for himself. mario wasn’t expecting the offer though. mario usually wasn’t a self conscious person- again, until the whole peach situation- and he admits he got bigger and his mustache has gotten a bit wild. mario didn’t want his friend to see him like that, he wanted his friend to think, “wow, mario hasn’t changed since i’ve seen him!”

“Er, how about next week? I’ve got, uh, a lot of.. cleaning up to do! rabbits trashed the place.” mario said with a sigh, rolling his eyes. he feigned annoyance as if waluigi could see him. waluigi sensed that mario was lying, but shook the feeling off. “Heh, good luck with that bud. See you next saturday?” “next saturday, mhm.” mario confirmed, swinging his legs over the bed to slide his feet into his house slippers. “Got it. See you saturday, mario.” waluigi said gruffly, hanging up before mario even got a chance to respond. hearing a small beep, he threw his phone beside him and sighed. “It’s gonna be a long week.”

and he was right.

he worked out and got back into shape (listen ik that’s not realistic but it’s fucking fiction about mario and cat boy kouda alright) and even cleaned up a little bit. his mustache was trimmed and shiny again, and plus he fight into his old overalls and red long sleeves. he had a bit of brightness and life in his big blue eyes again, feeling new and improved. he had even made a little meal for him and waluigi. pancakes, bacon that was a little burnt, and some scrambled eggs with fresh orange juice. mario tried as much as he could to cook, as he was used to toad making his food. mario was just finishing setting the last glass of orange juice down when he heard a knock at the door. “coming!” mario said, hurrying to the kingdom door. he open it, revealing a hunched over old man in purple long sleeves and some overalls. even though his mustache pointed down instead of being high and pointy, you could still tell it was him.

“Waluigi!” he gave the fellow old man a hug. Mario would never admit it, but having arms around him felt nice and warm. “Long time no see, huh?” waluigi joked. they both chuckled, until mario pat waluigi on the back. “come on in, come on in, i made food!”

- time skip 🤩 -

“a what baby?” mario asked waluigi, confused. “a sugar baby. I think it’ll be, er, beneficial to you.” waluigi grumbled. Mario sighed, facing the computer in front of him. He was on http://SugarHoney.com, a website for sugar babies and sugar mommies/daddies to find each other. “How will giving someone my money benefit me?” waluigi laughed. “you won’t be the only one giving. they’ll give you love and support in return.” mario didn’t seem convinced, waluigi could tell by the “what the hell” look on his face. waluigi sighed. “Just look at the profiles, lots of cute boys and girls there yeah?” he suggested, leaning back into the chair. Mario sighed. “Alright.”

and mario scrolled and scrolled and scrolled. “There’s no one interesting enough here.” mario complained.

“Give it here!” waluigi said in annoyance, tugging the computer away from him. “That’s because you’re not looking at the premium people.” waluigi grumbled after looking at the profiles. “here.” waluigi clicked on the premium tab. the premium tab was exclusively for the, how should i say it, *interesting* people on the website. mario sighed, grabbing the computer to search profiles once again. a few minutes passed, and mario still hadn’t found anyone that interested him. his eyes were still glued to the screen though. “waluigi, i don’t think that anybody- mama mia!” if the 😍emoji was real, that would be mario’s face.

arkouda chisaki.

major.

loves pasta.

cat boy.

he had just found the perfect one for him.

——

arkouda was sitting in the drivers seat of his car with his friends, waiting to be next in line at wendy’s. “soo why did you decide to be a sugar baby again?”

sisi asked. “do you see how much money they make sisi?” even though the question was rhetorical, sisi shook her head. kouda rolled with it anyway. “a lot. a whole lot.” he answered, tapping his fingers against the steering wheel. “I wanna be a sugar baby.” jailani announced randomly, obviously intrigued. Kouda sighed. “Lani, you’re a minor. You can’t do that.” “No no no, but what if i just support them from a distance with encouraging words and they give me money!” “I would much rather get frog stuffed animals than money.” Khloe added, holding her own giant stuffed frog. Kouda only laughed. He pulled up to the drive thru of wendy’s, putting his car in park. “Alright, what do y’all want?” Kouda asked everyone, scratching his cat boy ears (🤩). “A strawberry lemonade!!”sisi answered with a warm smile on her face. “Just a sprite please!” khloe said, poking her head in the middle of sisi and kouda. “Baconator!“ lani responded.

After he ordered everyone’s food along with his chicken sandwich and a cherry mello yello, he drove by a little spot in the woods he knew of. kouda got out of the car, holding the bags of food while sisi and khloe held their drink and lani held a pink and white picnic blanket. They all headed towards their usual hang out spot in a comfortable silence, nearing closer and closer the clearing. lani set down the blanket, mumbling about how if she feels a bug on her she’ll sob. sisi and khloe laughed, setting their drinks down where they were going to sit. “Bugs aren’t that bad lani!” sisi said, sitting down behind her drink. “Yeah dude, they’re adorable.” kouda said, setting the bags down in the middle. Lani rolled her eyes, ignoring the twos words.

soon everyone was happily enjoying their meal/drinks, talking about trauma, character anons, memes and shit about each other. yknow, the normal stuff. until someone’s phone goes off.

Sisi looks at everyone like 👀 because she put her phone on silent. khloe took out her phone and checked her notifications, but quickly put it back away. “nope!” lani shook her head without even caring to look. “my ringtone isn’t boring like that.” she huffed. kouda rolled his eyes and pulled out his phone. he got one notification.

http://SugarHoney.com: You’ve got (1) daddy request! From: papamari0

[pbandjesse]

Did I somehow forget to post my post last night? Im sorry. I have only been doing this for 9 years. Apparently just not used to it yet. Thank you to my mom for letting me know. 

Today was a good day. I am enjoying this new job so far but it was a little odd. 

I slept pretty well last night. I woke up when James got up but I slept until 715. And then honestly I felt pretty good. I got up and showered and got dressed. It was cold in here. But not to bad. I got dressed. Felt cute. I like my shorter hair, Honestly it could be a little shorter. But I think I might just get some soft curlers to give it more volume. Still feels cute though. 

I had a few messages this morning about things people wanted to buy and that was exciting. I havent gotten any frogs sold today but thats okay. I am going to have to remember to write things down because I was sort of confused about something but its okay. I will get it together. 

I headed to the PAL center and had a nice drive. The GPS took me a different way and that was nice. No highway. I got there around 815 and we dont have any kids signed up. Which is all good. So I spent some time looking at the classroom and making a little list of supplies it would be nice to have. I had my breakfast sandwich and decided I would try to clean up their art supply room. They have a lot of ceramic paints and regular paints and foam shapes. But not much more then that. They even have a kiln but they dont even know where the key to that room is. Wild. Well see what can happen with that. 

But then as I was doing that Lana texted me and asked me to go sub in at another site. So I packed up and headed out into the windy day. 

It was about 20 minutes away and they paid me for the travel time so that was nice. I got there and the teacher had shown up but they still asked me to stay. Thats chill. 

And honestly it was a chill day. It started quiet. I just watched the kids for a bit. But then once I felt comfortable I read my book for a bit. Worked on the instagram. Wrote in my notebook. I would periodically make rounds to ask if everyone was alright. It was a nice time. 

The teacher there made a couple comments about how boring the job was. But it was like. Well yeah. But I have things to do so its okay. She just didnt have anything. But as the day went on people would ask for help and have free time.And then one little girl needed to do PE and asked for help with yoga so me and her and another boy were doing yoga and ballet and cheer. She taught me some of her routines. It was very silly and fun. And from that point on everyone seemed a lot happier and were were more chatty. 

Lunch was long because the kids are from different schools and have different schedules. But we made it work. I had a nice time talking to the kids and the adults. Talking stories and adventures. Trying not to talk about the election to much. About how scared we all are. But it was a nice time. 

Honestly by 3 I was kind of sad I might not see those kids again. I dont know what site Ill be at one wednesday. Or going forward. But I said goodbye and headed out. 

I had thought about going for a drive but decided instead to go home. When I got back here a homeless man I have talked to before was outside and asked if I could make him a sandwich. We didnt have bread so I made him a bagel instead and packed an apple and cliff bar for him. Mr Will was outside, I think trying to shoo the man away, when I came out. It was nice to see Will and tell him I got a new job. He was excited for me. 

I headed up stairs and started putting things away when I noticed sweetP was staring hard at the doorway. And I was trying to figure out why. So I get down on his level and I see a mouse!!! AHHH!!

So I ran down to the laundry room where Will was and told him so he came up to see if he could catch it. But when we got back we couldnt find it. So he called the exterminator. Hopefully sweetP just catches it. 

Once Will left I got back to putting things away. Then played animal crossing for a little while. And then James was home! He had gone to the dentist. He has perfect teeth. 

I was kind of tired. He went to make pasta and I laid in bed under the covers because I was very cold. But soon I had pasta and felt better. 

Now I am hanging out in the dungeon. We are going to play a game with friends soon I think. Just have a little bit of normal. 

I am scared about tomorrow. I dont know how to explain it more then that. I just want to not know whats happening for as long as possible. I honestly dont think there is going to be a good outcome either way. But for real, if you havent voted yet, please go and do it tomorrow. Its so important. 

Goodnight everyone. Be safe. 

[cloudbatcave]

Earplugs chafe if you wear them too much.

Tuuya’s had ample time to find that out in their work as a quote unquote hero, but somehow, never enough time to figure out a better solution. 

“Please.” They say, tired and not a bit irate, as they sit down. “Stop screaming.”

That shuts the kid up, with a look of terror mixed with resentment on his acne-spotted face. Whoops, probably let the anger slip too much, and with worms coming out of both arms, that’s not a good look.

They don’t have any good looks, but they have marginally less threatening ones.

Being trapped in a half-caved-in grocery store isn’t helping the situation either. Buggering brick manipulator or whatever that villain was is a bloody incompetent; knocked themselves out in the process of knocking the walls down, Tuuya saw them go down, and their quirk isn’t exactly good for brute-force situations.

So now they get to wait while the actual heroes finish the job cleaning up the idiot’s pals, and babysit in the meantime, which is something they are so well suited for.

They ignore the kid for a moment - who’s fourteen if he’s a day - and take some bandages out, wrapping them around all the patches that still show the wriggling creatures. The worms make their resentment known as always by writhing, but similarly as always, they’re covered up anyway and the chances of the kid vomiting go down.

Tuuya is a world champion barf cleanup attendant, but that doesn’t mean they enjoy the practice.

When they look up the kid’s yanking snacks off the non-crushed shelves and sticking them in his backpack.

“Are you serious.” They drawl. “I can see you.”

The kid frowns.

“So? You’re a villain. What are you gonna do - report me?”

He snickers a little at the idea, bouncing back with the vitality of youth as he rifles through the chips and puts more in his backpack. 

They stand back up and flick some debris off their costume, then walk over until they’re leaning against an ice cream container whose lights are out and whose contents are slowly melting.

“What’s your quirk, kid?”

He stiffens, his gaze both angry and wary. He’s dressed in a hoodie under his backpack, and long pants. 

He also has bandages covering up the hands that are so quick to snatch things, and ones on his neck. 

“What are you, a cop?” He retorts. “If you’re not gonna help me out when the heroes get in here, just piss off.”

That snippy teen mouth doesn’t have fangs like theirs, but Tuuya sees that the tongue flickering in it isn’t standard.

They scoop out a wrapped ice cream sandwich - still plenty cold - and throw it at him.

He ducks with a hiss. An actual snakelike hiss, shoulders hunched.

“Thought so.” They nod in satisfaction.

“Shut up!”

He’s actually shaking with rage.

They don’t have the time or motivation or god forbid inclination to try and talk him down.

“Come quietly and you get the minimal trauma package.”

“What is your fucking problem?! You some kind of busybody villain who likes to snitch?”

He’s backing up against a shelf, for what reason they can’t - 

Tuuya hits the floor as a mouthful of what’s no doubt poison flies where their head was.

Oh no, it’s acid, busily melting through the debris of smashed-up vegetables. Yippee.

The kid looks ill, though. How many more times can he do that? 

They throw several ice creams to distract him and just as they hope, he nails them with three more shots of acid before he gags, spitting up blood.

Nope, nope, nope, not allowed.

They pick their way past the sizzling puddles (at least the acid is in small puddles and isn’t the type that spreads, those kinds of quirks are nightmares) and loom directly in front of him, offering up more bandages.

“For future reference, blood is supposed to stay inside you. And very fortunately for you, I’m not - at least legally - a villain anymore.”

They give their widest, most gleamingly sharp smile as he snatches it and coughs into it, shaking, and said smile turns more sardonic as he collapses into their waiting arms.

They pick him up as he goes unconscious and gently undo the bandages around his throat. Sure enough, there are dull gray scales underneath. Probably all around his body.

Some of the rubble shifts, zooming away in bunches of wrecked architecture and the ex-villain sees Shifter standing there looking about as happy as if she’d found a dead rat on her doorstep.

They obligingly hold up the boy.

Her eyes narrow as she steps toward them in her black boots and gray costume, short hair slicked with sweat.

“What’d you do, Hive.”

“Hey, he did it to himself - kid’s an acid spitter, some kind of snake quirk, but he can’t do it more than four times without taking a nap. Probably a runaway, he was looting the snacks.”

She peers over him and makes an irritated noise.

“Is that blood?”

“Oh yeah, he did that too right before slumberland.”

“This isn’t going to look good for you.”

Or any of us, is the implied line, but they know where the resentment is really focused.

Shifter doesn’t pretend to like Tuuya, but she also has about as much patience with conventional heroic nonsense as they do, which makes the pair of them practically friends. 

“When does anything look good for me? Don’t worry, I’ll take the fall. I have such a blamable face.”

The shorter hero mutters something about it having nothing to do with their face and they chuckle. 

Then she turns serious, crossing her arms.

“Hive, don’t you even think about trying to stick up for this kid. You know where it’ll lead.”

“Since when do I stick up for anyone?” 

They’re so nonchalant, they deserve a medal for the amount of effort they are putting in to being the epitome of devil-may-care right now.

Shifter just rolls her eyes, starts trying to restore some of the wreckage back into a vaguely store-shaped form, hands moving in and out.

“Just don’t do it. You know what they’ll say.”

The worm hero carefully lays the boy down on the ground; their arms are getting tired, and it wouldn’t do to drop him. Pity there’s nothing to put his head on. 

They don’t want to be yapped at too much.

Being borderline inhuman in ways that aren’t palatable to the general populace is only forgivable if you do your best to not seem interested in being that way. In other people who are that way.

Yet at the same time, the kid could be rehabilitated. Scales and acid aren’t the most acceptable of quirks, but adjustment is possible. It’s not like he has a tail, or other less savory features.

Or fangs, they muse, running their tongue over their own. If they weren’t so useful, and if it weren’t such a long-lost battle, they’d probably file them.

Their ears flick as they hear another hero come, walking quickly across the concrete as Shifter takes a break in her cleanup.

“Hivemind, what the fuck.”

“Hello, Larkspur, how’s the rumpus.”

The woman’s endless aggression and distaste would be perfectly ignorable and predictable to Tuuya if she didn’t have purple flowers growing out of her face and hair and slightly green-tinged skin.

Unlike Shifter, she’s tall and skinny, with long hair swathed in her namesake. A poison user of the most potent kind.

“How long have you been standing around?” She demands. “We could’ve used you.”

Shifter’s not going to help even if she wanted to. She’s smart enough to not want any of that, taking one look at the other woman, then Tuuya, and pointedly turning in the opposite direction. 

“All of five minutes, and I was keeping an eye on this little ruffian.”

Larkspur looks down and her lip curls.

“You couldn’t have left one unconscious teenager? Shifter’s right here. Unless you just didn’t want to help.”

Blessedly ignorant people might see that merely as an insinuation of laziness. 

The worm hero raises their eyebrows and shrugs.

“Maybe I wanted to keep an eye on an acid-spitter I apprehended.”

“So why aren’t they restrained? Hoping they’d wander off toward us?”

“Actually.” They drawl. “I didn’t want to give him a reason to freak out when he wakes up. It’s a tiny bit uncomfortable, being in chains. He’s a kid, Larkspur. He barely knows what he’s doing.”

“Oh, yeah, yeah. Obliviousness of youth.”

The sarcasm and spite in her voice could curdle milk, but Tuuya ignores it. 

“He’s an ordinary, somewhat angry kid who happens to have a quirk he needs to manage.” They say as calmly as possible. “Besides - I saw ice and lasers. I wouldn’t have been much use with those.”

“The rest of us can’t regenerate.” She says dismissively. “We can always use a distraction.” 

A use of their quirk that’s been exploited plenty of times. However, that doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt.

“Well, look how good you did without one! Wouldn’t want to steal your glory.”

Her green eyes narrow.

“Just get the kid back and file the report.” She turns around and stalks away.

As she goes, Shifter pauses and shakes her head at her associate.

“You’ve got to stop baiting her.”

“Why, just because she can kill me? That’s no fun. Does it count as bait if it’s true?”

“Yes.”

“Darn.”

The kid stirs.

Shifter lifts him into the air with her quirk and into Tuuya’s arms, an obvious cue.

They give her a dazzling smile as they hurry off to the police station.

[quoth-the-sparrow]

Happy Birthday Sparrow! (hope this makes you smile)

It was a crisp autumn night on that November night. Daniel pulled his purple and black scarf tighter around his neck to keep the chill out, savoring the light crunch of dead leaves beneath his feet, as he walked to the home of his tutor. Ordinarily they met every late afternoon on Fridays at Panera, but this time his math tutor requested they have their tutoring session at his place. It’s not that Daniel minded going to the part-time tutor/full time teacher’s house. Weird as it may have seemed, he actually really liked Logan Sanders. Almost as much as he hated math, which was quite a lot. He’d come to think of his college professor as a father figure really. But like, the actually good kind. Daniel had even gotten to be pretty well acquainted with his teacher’s three husbands who were all weird and cool and wonderful people. One of his husband’s Roman even used to live next door to Daniel’s family before the four men all moved in together.

            But lets face it- no one wanted to do work on their birthday. Definitely not Daniel. Not that he’d expected this year’s womb emancipation day to be anything all that special. He had nothing planned, his parents certainly weren’t going to make a big fuss over it, and oh yeah, he had no friends to share it with. At least not any in person friends. Anyone that Daniel actually felt close to he’d met over the internet and they were all miles away. There was no one in this town he felt close to, who knew the real him. Except his old pal seasonal depression maybe, and it wasn’t exactly the fun-time party type. Still, birthdays were meant to be a time when you could relax, be happy and enjoy yourself. Or at least do whatever the hell you wanted, even if for Daniel that meant laying in bed all day re-reading The Night Circus, or one of his other dozens of well worn books. 

            Buuuut he needed to pass his Calculus mid-term coming up. Plus he would’ve felt bad canceling on Logan. Ah well. Maybe he’ll make us some pb and crofters jam sandwiches to eat while we work, Daniel thought. Soon he was in front of the light blue painted house marked number 24. Seemed like Patton had planted some new yellow and orange flowers for the season, and the meticulously carved jack-o-lantern, no doubt Virgil’s work, was still on the porch even though Halloween had passed two days ago. To Daniel’s surprise the lights were all off from inside the windows. Was he too early?Were the supposed to meet at Panera after all? Daniel choked down his anxiety and walked up to the red painted door. He knocked three times. After about thirty seconds the door was opened and Logan stepped out to greet him.

“Salutations Daniel,” the teacher said.

“Hey Logan. I’m on time for tutoring right?” Daniel asked.

“Quite punctual,” he said with a smile. “A trait among many I admire about you.”

            For a second Daniel thought he heard whispers and shuffling from behind the bespectacled man. He couldn’t figure out why logical Logan would have the lights in his house off if he was home. Maybe his husbands were out and he’d been reading with just a lamp somewhere quietly? No way, someone’s gotta be in there making those noises. Logan cleared his throat, which brought Daniel back out of his head. 

“I do apologize for the location change from our usual tutoring spot,” said Logan.

“It’s not a problem. Although I still don’t get the reason why.”

“Simply put, it was a matter of utmost importance.”

“O-kaaay.”

“Please come in.”

Daniel followed Logan into the large dark house. If the queer 23 (now 24 year old, geez that felt weird) didn’t know Logan better, he’d be more worried about this turning into a slasher film-esqe scenario. As it was, he was more concerned about not accidentally stubbing his toe on any furniture.

“So before we get started on calculus, mind telling me why all the lights are—

The house lights came on without warning. Before Daniel had time to process what the heck was going on he was suddenly barraged by a chorus of,

“SURPRISE!!!!”

            After Daniel managed to get his very surprised heart back to a normal beating pace, he took a better look around the living room. There were balloons in all colors of the rainbow, and some even had the words ‘queer and here’ written on them in sharpie. There were streamers wrapped around the bannister rail and a big banner above the kitchen entryway that read “Happy Birthday Daniel” in bright purple and blue letters. On each corner of the banner were pictures of a crown, a cat, a brain, and a storm cloud covered in glitter. Beneath it Roman and Patton were both smiling, arms over each other’s shoulders and wearing party hats. Even the emo adult artist had one on. Roman meanwhile, theatrical as ever, was blowing through the three kazooz he has in his mouth. To the right of them against the wall was a table laden with assorted snacks, drinks, gifts and even cookies shaped like witches hats. What amazed the young queer writer most of all was that Daniel’s friends were there. Not just Logan, Virgil and Like his actual friends he recognized from online. He knew only because they had pinned to their clothes nametags with their usernames written on them. silversmith-91, ironwoman359, the-incredible-sulk, eggheadinthemaking, asofterfan, randomslasher, thelogicaloganipus, lala-the-rebel and many others. Even his lifemate April was there. The others who weren’t there in person were present and waving via Skype from at least twelve different laptops scattered around the room at visible angles.

��       “Wha-what is all this?” Daniel asked, mouth agape. “How did?”

            Before he could finish, Logan’s last partner Patton came in from the kitchen carrying a chocolate cake covered with purple, white and pale blue frosting. two and three candles adorned the top as did the swirling icing letters that spelled “Happy Birthday Sparrow.”

            “Happy birthday kiddo!” Patton said beaning. “Hope ya like your surprise!” 

            Logan chuckled from beside him, a hand placed on his shoulder. Your partner April’s idea. They contacted the four of us informing that you had had a difficult year and that, with your birthday approaching, inquired if there may be someway we could celebrate it.”

“You’ve become such a friend to us the past two years kiddo,” said Patton. “Almost like our own child.” 

“So we concocted this grand venture to ensure you have the best celebration of your very important birth!” Roman said, coming over. “It was not an easy quest, but we achieved it!” 

“Hellishly tough to be honest,” said Virgil. “But we were happy to make it happen.” 

“Between the four of us, we were able to contact your online friends with April’s help and arrange it so that they could skype at the same time tonight.” Logan explained. “Virgil was able to supply the laptops, which he commandeered from his job at the Radioshack for tonight.”

“Punk as hell,” Daniel smirked, still half in shock.

“You know it pal,” Virgil smirked.

“Hence why I requested to have tutoring here at our house,” said Logan. “Not only for convenience and to ensure you have, as Patton insisted upon—

‘”A super-prize’ party!” Patton said. Logan groaned at his husband’s pun but Daniel caught the warmth in his eyes.

“And for those who were able to set aside time to travel, I used my frequent flier miles from traveling for film shoots to help get them here,” said Roman.

“And I baked the cake and all the snacks from my bakery!” Patton beamed proudly.

            Daniel was pretty much in tears by this point. His friends and partner were worried upon seeing them, thinking they’d gone overboard or something. But the young wiccan ensured them all they were tears of joy. He’d never felt so loved, so important before. Everyone assured him that he was, and it was the truth. The rest of the night was spent chatting, laughing, playing party games, including one or two very long rounds of cards against humanities. To everyone’s shock, Patton was surprisingly good at it. Virgil had put together an excellent music playlist that everyone jammed out to, even Logan a few times. Meanwhile Roman rallied them all into a game of red-robin story telling, which Daniel had a blast at.

            When it was time to open presents he baulked at the wonderful gifts. Some of his online friends had either written ficlets for him or made things by hand. Logan gave him a Barns & Noble giftcard. Virgil gifted him a cool leather bound journal, an original painting, and a quill pen. Patton made him a hand-knitted sweater that Daniel wore all night long. And Roman, well his gift was best of all. It was a handmade binder that fit Daniel perfectly and comfortable. It was of purple fabric with a sparrow embroidered on the front in read thread.

            Daniel never wanted this night to end. He couldn’t have been more grateful for his amazing friends, whom he knew now more than ever loved and cared for him, even thought they were far away. He was so grateful to his partner April for their brilliant and selfless plan to get them all together and celebrate his just being alive in the first place. And as for the four grown men whom he considered family (or LAMP as he called them), well, they’d given him more than they’d ever know. As Patton told him to make a wish on his birthday candles, Daniel felt like his wish had already come true.

Oh my hecking stars and comets, @khadij-al-kubra thank you so much?! I'm so flattered and happy and I loved this; thank you?! This is so cute and well-written and I love it so much?! I know I'm gushing but just aashsjdhshs thank you!!!!

[shannaraisles]

Dear Friend - Chapter 9

My festive project. A Modern AU heavily based on The Shop Around The Corner, in which Cullen Rutherford finds love between Satinalia and First Day. [Read on AO3]

Chapter Nine

Something had changed. Cullen just couldn't quite put his finger on what it was.

It wasn't as though the routine had changed, either at work or at home. With First Day approaching, complete with its variations in the rota to allow those who had worked Satinalia to have First Day free, he had his new responsibilities thrust upon him somewhat, having to work out that rota, sign the leave requests and pay slips, meet with the board to confirm his promotion. That should have been distraction enough. But no. He was finding Mila Trevelyan incredibly distracting this week.

Whether it was his being so aware of her when she walked into a room, or the simple fact that his daughter's deadline was approaching fast and he was battling true terror at the thought of confessing his deception, he couldn't tell. All he really knew was that this new awareness of a woman who could make his heart shudder with a smile was messing with his ability to hold more than one thought in his head at a time. And Maker's breath, that smile. The way her dark eyes lit up when she looked at him these days; the way her expression warmed, her whole being seemed to soften; the way she said his name ... was that what had changed? Was it worth daring to hope that she'd decided to focus her attention on him, rather than the pen pal that had inexplicably abandoned her?

"Daddy?"

"Mmm?"

Cullen looked up from his paperwork. He'd set himself up in the break-room to work on the staff rota for the first quarter of the new year coming, ostensibly because it was warmer in there than in his office, and better for Alys to be somewhere people were constantly moving in and out of. In all honesty, he was here because of ...

"Do you think Mila has a nice bottom?"

Cullen jerked sharply, dragging his eyes away from the shapely posterior he'd been absently focused on for the last Maker-knew how long just before Mila looked over her shoulder at him, that sinfully sweet smile rather wicked as she raised her brows.

"Why would you ask me that, Alys?" he asked, attempting to seem innocent. He knew as soon as he said it, however, that it had been a bad call. Alys had not yet learned tact.

"Because you keep staring at her bottom," his daughter pointed out with a grin that only grew when Mila laughed. "So you must think she has a nice bottom."

"You have been watching it move about for a while, Cullen," Cassandra added from the other side of the room, her own smile a little more teasing than he was entirely used to.

"Maker's breath, Cassandra, don't encourage her," he protested, trying to ignore the multiple grins pointed at him from the current inhabitants of the break-room. He was just lucky Varric wasn't here, he supposed; that would have been much worse.

"I have to admit, I'm curious," Mila commented in a teasing tone of her own, twisting to look over at him more comfortably. "I'd quite like to hear this answer."

Cullen felt his mouth working silently as he tried to think of some way to save himself from what he knew was going to be the inevitable embarrassment of either pretending ignorance or admitting his distraction. And since both Alys and Cassandra had so kindly pointed out the focus of that distraction ... He sighed, rubbing a hand over his neck.

"Yes, Alys, Mila has a lovely bottom," he heard himself say, feeling his skin flush with bashful awkwardness. But he was determined to come out of this with at least some dignity, raising his eyes to meet Mila's smiling gaze with defiance. "What I've seen of it, anyway."

The woman in question laughed again, that rich warm sound Cullen could have sworn he'd started hearing in his dreams this week. "If you want a better look, you only have to ask."

The explosion of laughter from Cassandra on the other side of the room told Cullen all he wanted to know about the look on his face. Even Alys was giggling, abandoning her little project to pad over and pat his hand gently.

"S'okay, Daddy," she assured him. "I don't mind if you want to look at Mila's bottom some more."

"Can we please stop talking about Mila's bottom?" he asked helplessly.

The question was badly timed - Sera had just walked in. Never one to resist the opportunity presented to her, the cheeky elf snickered at her welcome, stepping smartly over to Mila to squeeze said backside just for the hell of it.

"Softer than it looks, yanno," she informed the room in general, cackling with laughter as Mila batted her hands away.

"No touchy-touchy!" Mila laughed with her, handing over a cup of coffee to the bright-eyed elf in charge of the small primates. "Did you manage it?"

Sera grinned over the rim of her cup. "All settled," she agreed mysteriously. "Small Bits should get the full treatment."

"Of what?" Alys demanded in a curious tone. She knew her own nicknames among the staff at the zoo, after all.

Mila flashed her a cheerful smile. "Oh, a little bird told me you were interested in seeing the orangs up close," she said casually, not even glancing at Cullen as he grinned. He wasn't exactly a little bird. "I might have called in a couple of favors."

Alys' eyes were wide. "I can see the orange monkeys?" she asked breathlessly, excitement rolling off her as she bounced on her toes. "Up close? Like touching and everything?"

Mila chuckled. "Sure," she nodded. "If your dad says it's all right, we could go right now. I'm still on break for another twenty minutes, and Bull won't let anything bad happen to you with them when I have to get back to it."

At that point, Cullen found his face captured by two small hands squishing his cheeks between her palms as Alys looked into his eyes hopefully. He could only imagine how ridiculous he looked, judging by the poorly concealed snickers coming from Sera as she made her own lunch.

"Can I, Daddy? Please, please, please?"

He laughed, pulling her little hands away from his face to kiss her fingers affectionately. "If you promise to do everything Bull tells you to," he bargained with Alys. "Just because they don't have claws, it doesn't mean they're not dangerous if you don't approach them in the right way."

"But they're cuddly," the little girl began to complain, but to Cullen's surprise, Mila had his back on this one.

"No, sweetie, they're not," she told Alys, moving to join them. "They're wild animals, even if they do have to live in captivity. They're strong, much stronger than humans - that's why Bull is their keeper. If one of the males decided to grab hold of you, he could break your arm or your leg, and that wouldn't be fun, would it?"

Alys shook her head, sighing. "But if I stay with Bull, I can go see them and maybe shake hands or something?" she asked hopefully.

Mila's expression gentled. "That's the idea, kiddo."

"Okay!" Just like that, Alys' enthusiasm returned, and again Cullen was on the receiving end of that hopeful gaze. "Please, Daddy?"

He chuckled at her cheerful plea. "I'm still waiting for that promise."

"I promise I will do everything Bull tells me to do and I won't poke the orange monkeys," the little girl declared in a singsong voice, wiggling her little finger in his direction.

Despite the sheer inanity of being asked to join a pinky-swear in front of his colleagues, Cullen wrapped his little finger about Alys' without a second thought, squeezing gently as she beamed up at him.

"All right," he conceded, laughing when she let loose a loud cheer and threw her arms around his neck for a tight hug. "Go, have fun!"

"I'm goin'!"

There was something very endearing about the way Mila let Alys seize her hand and drag her toward the door, the two of them very natural together as they slipped out of sight. Very natural, he realized. They'd spent so much time together over the past year without knowing who they were to one another, and despite his animosity toward Mila and hers toward him, she had never let it colour her friendship with his daughter. How had he not seen that?

"You are staring again."

Cullen blinked, his head snapping around to look toward Cassandra with vague irritation. "I have not been staring," he protested quietly. "I've just been ... looking in that direction while thinking."

"Thinking about what's at the top of Legs's legs," Sera agreed with another cackle of laughter, taking her sandwich and coffee back out through the door. She never actually ate in the break-room, preferring to go and sit with her marmosets over the people she worked with.

"I wasn't -"

"Cullen." Cassandra's voice was surprisingly gentle. "Don't you think it is about time you told Mila the truth? It is clear that she likes you very much, just as you are. Surely the revelation will not be so very dreadful now you have made this connection."

Cullen sighed, leaning forward onto his elbows. "It's harder than it seems, Cassandra," he told her regretfully. "I ... I like her. Alys likes her. But what if telling her the truth destroys that? What if I all end up doing is hurting myself and two people I care about? That isn't so very hard to understand, is it?"

His friend frowned, her expression thoughtful. "She is not so unforgiving as you seem to think," she reminded him. "She has certainly forgiven you for a year of grumpiness, as you have forgiven her. I do not think the risk is so huge as you are allowing yourself to believe."

"But still a risk," he said in an unhappy tone.

Cassandra sighed, rising to her feet. "I do not know what to tell you," she said softly. "I see you enjoying her company; I see Alys enjoying her company. I see that you seem to make one another happy. But I also see you holding her at arms' length, keeping your shield up at all times. That is a sure way never to be hurt, yes. But it is a certain way never to be loved, either." She squeezed his shoulder gently. "Perhaps it is time to lower your shield, Cullen."

"Perhaps." He managed a faint smile for his friend, patting her hand. "I'm working toward it, Cassandra," he promised in a low tone. "Just ... just give me time."

She nodded, letting the subject go at that. Cullen was relieved when she left the break-room, able to turn his attention back to the rota in front of him, grateful for the distraction from those worrying thoughts that urged him into making a leap he was not certain he was ready for. Wrangling names and dates into some kind of fair distribution across four months of duty shifts was more than enough to keep him enthralled for a couple of hours, at the very least, in his own little world, unaware of the comings and goings of shift changes and coffee breaks happening in the same room.

Until a slender hand found his shoulder, and a fleece-covered chest leaned against his other shoulder from behind, urging him out of his scowling at the rota to look up and find Mila leaning over him, setting a fresh cup of coffee and an elfroot tablet down on the table by his hand. She was so close, he could see the smudge of dirt on her neck below her ear, flecks of hay caught in her hairline at her nape, smell the elfroot lotion she used on her hands overlaying the honest sweet musk of her clean sweat ... caught her smiling eyes with the quiet horror of a man who knows he's been caught staring. Her fingers flexed gently on his shoulder.

"You look like you're brewing a headache there," Mila commented in a soft tone, her own eyes scanning the draft rota in front of him. "Can I help?"

Swallowing, Cullen dropped his eyes to the page on the table. "I don't know, can you? I know there's a mistake somewhere here, but I've been looking for an hour and still can't find it."

It was embarrassing how quickly her hand fell to tap gently against the column for Wintersend. He knew before she spoke what the mistake had been.

"Zoo's closed on that day," she pointed out, her smile audible in her voice. "You've put a full crew on for a half-crew day."

"That does explain the problem." He nodded wearily, almost regretting his agreement when she drew away to slide down into a seat beside his. Missing the gentle pressure of her against his back, the strange sense of intimacy within boundaries that had become normal over the past week. Was that what had changed?

She watched as he made the correction, her hands tucked about her own cup. "Alys tells me you're on your own for Last Day," she said conversationally. "Something about staying at her grandparents'?"

Cullen let out a huff of laughter as he leaned back in his seat, gratefully swallowing the elfroot tablet with a swig of coffee. "They claimed her from me with the promise of staying up past midnight," he told Mila in amusement, shaking his head. "And since I'm working First Day morning, I thought it wouldn't do any harm."

She seemed to consider him for a moment, a flicker of something wary that might almost have been fear showing in her dark eyes very briefly before she shrugged one shoulder. "Well, it's no fun to be alone on the last night of year," she said in a casual tone. "Would you like to spend it with me? I have a party to go to but, uh ... well, no one to go with."

He stared at her. Did she just ...? "Isn't that rather a waste of an invitation?"

Mila snorted with laughter. "I don't consider it a waste to invite someone I like spending time with to come and ring in the new year with me."

She did. She asked me out. And despite the wariness, the nerves, the fear, Cullen heard his answer make itself known aloud before his caution could veto it. "I'd love to," he told her, his lips quirking into a smile that she echoed with startling warmth. "Shall I pick you up at eight?"

She nodded slowly. "Make it nine," she suggested. "I'm working the overlap shift - won't be home until seven. There's all sorts of things a woman has to do to make sure people in public don't realize she does anything but bathe in jasmine and sing princess tunes all day, you know."

Cullen chuckled, his own head bobbing in agreement. "I shall endeavor not to arrive before you have done all that you feel necessary to do to yourself," he assured her, "though you don't need to do any of it."

"Oooh, listen to the charmer," she laughed teasingly, leaning back in her own seat with a comfortable smile. "We should have a good time. Just leave the stick up your ass by the door before you leave home."

"Only if you leave the twisted panties in the dresser before you leave home," he heard himself counter, suddenly torn between guilt and amusement at how easy it felt to tease her in return.

Mila let out a burst of laughter. "You've got a deal, Rutherford," she assured him. "No panties, no stick. Should be a fun evening."

The wink she sent his way was enough to derail his thoughts yet again. No panties ... Maker's breath. How in the Void am I supposed to concentrate on work now?

[pomegranctes]

u could stop at 5 or 6 stores... or jus 1

vesper ophelia reeve !

this is vesper my mc’freakin BABY.......

hayley law fc whom is not a tragic ass shit full of teenage angst despite that bein my speciality bcos i lov torturing my chars xDD

was raised by two hippie, nirvana searching, lush loving moms who cherished and loved vesper after finding her abandoned in a stroller at stanley park </3

despite being adopted and left on a huge fricken island she really doesn’t feel any resentment towards her birth parents ? she jus p much feels indifferent like isn’t in any rush to meet them and is jus content with where she is rn so don’t count on any philo soul searching

so like i said her moms were hella hippie and vegan and socialist and true believers in becoming one with the world, saving it, etc like they were jus super passionate bout making everything a better place and after adopting vesper that need only intensified as they wanted the best for their lil girl<3

like her parents, she grew up super healthy and earth loving and all-in-all an advocate for peace on earth and all this

it was NAWT easy to make friends tho bcos she was always the weird girl who only ever had thrift shop clothes ( before it became a #trend and was jus a sign of how broke u were xDD ) and never wore makeup but being the toughie she is, she stuck through it without complaint

she still shops at the thrift store tho bcos capitalism

attempted to have a rebellious teen stage after watching thirteen and took up smoking, ate some meat, pierced her nose, and did all this stupid stuff to fit in with everybody else but knew it wasn’t her crowd so she gave that up pretty quick and chalked it up to a learning experience

after graduating, with a heavy heart she said good bye to her moms and took off her london to study environmental law and she says it’s to save the bees and all this and convinces herself that’s why but she’s got an ulterior motive which p much just to have a mc’blast in london but her whole “i am above insouciance, all for the greater good, etc” mindset makes her feel almost guilty about it

since being in london tho she’s seen some things, learned some things, is p much now realizing that wanting to have fun for herself without the whole vegan guilt catching up to her isn’t that bad??? she knows that u gotta put urself first huns Xx

has a bubbly and approachable exterior but lowkey inside she still gets self conches about being the weird girl and will have these bouts where she doubts every fricken friendship she’s ever had

loves trying new things all the time and even if that restaurant you ate at last week gave you the shits but the food was good she’ll take the risk of food poisoning just to have that experience

is hella quirky but not in a bella thorne licking gregg skulkin way more in a hippie who listens to the weirdest music and loves orange pulp

works as a radio host for imperial college where she talks philosophy, feminism, and plays indie rock trash

leeder matheus sousa !

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zU13Ql0HRJc

i was not memeing around when i said that i was gonna make a rudy cult leader muse after watching that vid

his name is leeder but prefers people calling him leeds bcos even he can see the disgustign pun

grew up in vegas to some major gambling parents who ran off to sin city for a good time but got caught up in the fancy lights and found that they jus couldn’t leave ? eventually got knocked up and had leeder and would you know it, he was named after a slot machine

his life fluctuated from dinners at upscale restaurants to panhandling outside a casino and p much grew up having to take care of himself all the time what with his parents gone all the fricken time wasting their money

he tried confronting them about it once but things got out of hand too quickly and he ran away from home for a week but his parents hardly noticed his absence the times that they were home and just figured he was in his room or at a friend’s

at 15 he knew he had no savings or anything, he figured as much with his parents, so ever since his first job he started saving up whatever money he could in some last ditch self preservation

at 17 now he runs away just to see what would happen and he isn’t that shocked when there’s no milk carton portraits and no breaking news stories about a missing kid in vegas but some small part of him still held out that hope and was resentful for it

that stunt hella shaped him and hardened him and ever since then, he grew up bitter and spiteful and is p much hella self preserved and will almost always do whatever is best for himself even if other peepz are collateral

so anyway at 22 he basically formed his own cult :P he would scout and pick up these lost runaways and tell them all about “finding themselves” and all this load of bs and got them to believe they were leaving behind their old messy lives in favour of a sort of paradise which was p much just them being high off their minds a good amount of the time and strumming some shit music around a bonfire while they slept in tents outside his own decked out bungalo

so yea he got this cult going and on the low was dealing w some hella drugs and trafficking p much anything and everything and then disater strikes, shit hits the fan, there’s people after him, the whole lot which drove him to leave the country and come to london, hence why he’s here now :P

he still got some connections so he used those and got back into the whole drug thing and is now jus trynna find some new recruits to join his cult ( plot idea mayhaps :P )

hudson kirk schrader !

nickname is schrader but feel free 2 call him hudson, he jus goes w the flow :P

honestly been watching too much fricken workaholics

he’s deadass 100% blake and so catch me copying and pasting his bio

a hella burnout who faked some bullshit illness he searched up on wikipedia and got a medical marijuana lisence for it. how he pulled it off exactly is still unknown, even to himself ( believe it or not, he was high when he did it )

grew up in rancho cucamonga his whole life and the only time he saw outside of it was the one roadtrip he took to los angeles but he surprisingly hated it and he says its bcos the city is too big but he knows it’s bcos some guy he met at the beach called his sandals ugly and people laughed

his parents divorced when he was like 9 so he’s got two younger half siblings but he only sees them like once a month. he doesn’t mind though, they’re all p close and there’s not some family vendetta or anything lolz his parents still get along and all that

despite being stuck there though, he made the most of his small city life and grew up with a positive outlook on everything like u really cannot catch him thinking the glass is half empty

lives for the weekends. only works as a telemarketer/salesperson and yea it’s a shit job with no time off and a poor salary but does he care ? as long as it’s enough to keep living, he’s content

diet p much consists of cheap beer and delivery pizza. ihop breakfasts when he’s feeling rich or p much jus craving pancakes at 3am

took a stripper class one time for the sicc experience but he tells everyone it was to look at half naked peepz

can and will shove an entire party platter of sliced salamis that fell on the floor into his mouth if it means he’ll make some money off of it, even if it’s only $5 bcos hey, that can at least cover his tab at the bowling alley

he's the guy at the party who makes a massive cheese and cracker sandwich called the eliminator

enjoys pitting people against each other but not in a shit ass annoying naslund way or a devil reincarnate lourdes way more in a “hey what’ll happen if i do this” knowing dam well what will happen but going for it anyways

strange personality makes him interesting and fun 2 hang with but also a lil bit misunderstood bcos he jus trynna b himself </3

is a good friend who’s willing to take risks and try new things and he’ll trick u into joining him for a night you’ll never forget mostly bcos of the tattoo and the scar and the croatian wife u now have

a weirdo w self confidence who can pick up on that rude thing u said about his mom but spends too long thinking of a slick comeback and by the time he figures it out the conversation has already taken four different turns

understands human psyche and knows that u lose a woman when u forget 2 cherish her but honestly he’s always there if u need a pal to lean on and he will do anything in his power 2 make sure ur okay

spends his off time people watching on top of his house. deadass has got lawn chairs, a cooler, and everything set up on there and even after breaking his collorbone when he fell off, he refuses to listen to the safety concerns of his neighbours and p much the general public

truly has no story for how he got to london, jus decided to pick up and leave one day and is p much living the same life he lived in america but different setting :P

[elspethsunschampion]

Fact or Fiction: Chapter Eight

Rated M for abuse, sexual content, and discussion of rape/non-con.  Canon-typical violence.

Summary: It’s Ral Zarek’s sixth year at Hogwarts. And everything would be fine if Jace wasn’t totally occupied with his new girlfriend, to the point where it’s honestly kind of weird, and Ral’s starting to be concerned. Now if only everyone would stop telling Ral he’s just jealous and LISTEN to him…after all, he’s NOT just jealous, right? (Sequel to Send to Sleep.)

Ships: Jace Beleren/Ral Zarek, Harry Potter/Draco Malfoy, Luna Lovegood/Hermione Granger, Nissa Revane/Chandra Nalaar, Elspeth Tirel/Teysa Karlov

A/N: Many, many thanks to @paperclipminimizer for beta-ing and checking my timeline, as well as answering all my questions about Harry Potter. Thanks also to Juri, @dragons-suck, and everyone on Sketchydoodles’ Vorthos server for listening to me rant about this thing as it took shape.

Also available on AO3 and FFnet.

Prologue

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter Four

Chapter Five

Chapter Six

Chapter Seven

Chapter Eight: Rally

           The new arrival turned out to be extremely hungry in addition to frustrated. Ral took her down to the kitchens and politely asked the house elves to get her some food, which they were more than happy to do.

           “So you’re Elspeth’s pen pal?” he said, after Teysa had eaten her way through three pumpkin sandwiches and was finally looking as if she were going to slow down.

           Teysa nodded, neatly patting a few crumbs away from the corner of her mouth with her napkin. “And when I didn’t hear from her in a few weeks, I got concerned,” she explained. “We’ve been writing back and forth for years, and she has never missed a response.”

           Chewing on his lip, Ral made a split-second decision. “Okay, so I think I know who did this to her,” he said, then put up a hand to stop Teysa from rising up into a whirlwind of fury. She would probably have fallen off the high stool they had put her on anyway; her feet were dangling about a foot above the ground. “Nobody believes me, so maybe I—” he grimaced, “—it’s possible that I’m wrong, but I don’t think so.”

           Quickly, he brought Teysa up to speed on the events of the semester.

           “Well,” she said, pulling a face, “I do think you might be jealous—” Ral growled at her, “—but I also think you’re correct, so it doesn’t matter.”

           “I just don’t know what to fucking do about it,” Ral complained. “I mean, I guess I could try to follow Emmara or something? But I don’t even know if that would work, and those aren’t the kind of spells I know how to cast. I’m not so good at subtle.”

           “I don’t know how to cast them, either, but I can direct you to do so.” Teysa’s eyes were sharp. “I’m an excellent tutor, and I have a good knowledge of subterfuge and spying.”

           “But if you can’t cast them yourself—”

           “I’m a squib.” Teysa’s admission made her face screw up as if she’d swallowed a lemon. “I can’t cast spells.”

           Well, that did explain why she wasn’t at school at Hogwarts. “I’m a Muggleborn,” Ral shrugged. “Hell, I nearly went to high school at a Muggle school. Well, I guess I wouldn’t have because I wouldn’t want to leave Jace and Elspeth, but I bet I’d have learned a lot.”

           Teysa’s thin eyebrows went up expressively. “Hm,” she said, as if she hadn’t been expecting that reaction. “Well, I’m sure I can teach you some very useful spells.” She gave him a thin smile. “And then we can figure out exactly what is going on.”

           First things first, Ral thought. They needed a place for Teysa to stay, and spending time in the Hufflepuff common room or dormitories was definitely not a good idea. Ral got on all right with the other Slytherins, but he didn’t spend much time in the dungeon as a rule; someone might notice. He wasn’t close to anyone in Ravenclaw. Well, what was left was pretty obvious. Ral grinned darkly. Emmara was going to be sorry she’d fucked with Jace, and maybe even sorrier that she’d fucked with Nissa.

           “C’mon,” he said to Teysa.

           “Where are we going?” As she asked, she carefully got to her feet, wincing a little. “Damn.”

           “What’s wrong?”

           “It’s nothing,” Teysa snapped, and Ral paused at her sudden irritation, then shrugged.

           “All right then,” he said. “We’re going to find a friend.”

           He had been a little worried that Chandra would still be hanging around the Hospital Wing instead of back in her dorm, but they had go slowly, partly because Teysa seemed to be limping slightly, and partly because Ral wasn’t sure that he wanted to run into anyone else with her. There might be awkward or annoying questions, since he had no idea what the provisions were for non-wizard visitors at the school who weren’t relatives.

           When they reached the Gryffindor common room, it was deserted apart from Gideon, who had his feet curled up under him as he squatted on the couch, frowning over a Potions textbook. He looked up briefly and nodded at Ral, smiled politely at Teysa.

           “Is that your sister?” he asked Ral.

           “Oh, ah—” Before Ral had quite decided, Teysa smiled winningly and answered for him, “Yes, that’s me.”

           “Um, yeah, Gideon, this is Teysa,” Ral said, wondering if they really looked that much alike. “Teysa, Gideon. Hey, we were just looking for Chandra, is she around?”

           Gideon’s forehead creased back into a frown. “She’s up in the dorm,” he said. “She’s kind of upset. You, um, you might want to be careful going up there. She tends to—break things.”

           “Been there.” Ral shrugged and led Teysa up the stairs towards the Gryffindor girls’ dormitories.

           He didn’t bother to knock, opting instead to just throw open the door. This turned out to nearly be a painful error, because a wave of crackling flame was suddenly heading directly for his face. Luckily for him, he’d had his hand on his wand, and he managed to snap it up and shout, “Protego!” before he and Teysa were charred to a crisp.

           “Oh,” Chandra said, dully. “It’s you. Sorry.”

           “Yeah, what’d you think?”

           Chandra was sprawled on her bed, idly playing with her wand—well, maybe not so idly. She stared up at him, sighed, and shrugged.

           “This is Teysa,” Ral said, letting his new friend squeeze in the door behind him. “She’s here to help us get rid of Emmara.”

           “Oh really?” Chandra sat up and swung her legs over the side of the bed. She looked at Teysa skeptically. “How exactly is a ten-year-old going to help?”

           Teysa stared her down levelly, drawing herself up to her full height of slightly-less-than-five-feet. “I am seventeen and a half,” she said, “and I happen to be the heir to the Orzhov family, so I have a great deal of experience with dark magic.”

           “Huh,” Chandra said. “What are you doing here?”

           “I came to look for Elspeth.”

           “Oh,” said Chandra, then, “Ohhhh. Oh wow.”

           “So can she stay here? Seems like the easiest place for her. I think it’s better if Emmara doesn’t know about her.”

           “Yeah, I’ll figure something out.” Chandra’s face puckered slightly. “Um, I’m sorry about the, um, the fire thing,” she said rapidly, staring at her feet.

           “I’m fine.” Ral rubbed the back of his neck in embarrassment. “It’s not a problem.”

           “I’m not sure what happened.”

           “Professor Lovegood said you might be an elementalist,” Ral offered. “Like me.”

           “A what?”

           He shook his head. “We can talk about it another time. Right now I’d really like to figure out what the fuck Emmara is doing to Jace and the others and how to stop it.”

           “Right. Let’s see how good you two are at magic,” Teysa smirked.

           Hermione collapsed into bed with a sigh. She had been intending to do a little work this evening, and then read through some of the more promising titles that she and Luna had hunted out of the library, but she was just so tired. Maybe she’d just go to bed early, just this once—

           A knock on her door startled her back to full wakefulness. For a moment, she considered turning over and just going to sleep, but, with a sigh, she decided against it. Heaving herself out of bed was more of an effort than she felt it should have been. She stood for a moment, rubbing her eyes and trying to smooth her hair, and then, finally, she answered the door.

           Outside, Luna was shifting from foot to foot. She looked up with a hopeful smile when she saw Hermione. “Good evening!” she said brightly, and Hermione had to smile back. It was almost unsettling, how warm and wonderful everything seemed when Luna was around. Something about her just lit up whatever room she was in. “I wondered if you wanted to go through some more of the books together.”

           If it had been anyone else, Hermione would have said that she really ought to get some sleep instead, but her mind weighed the thought of an extra hour of sleep versus an extra hour of Luna, and Luna came out miles ahead almost instantly. “I’d—I’d like that,” she replied. “Do come in.”

           Luna had been in Hermione’s small quarters before, though they usually spent most of their time together in the teachers’ lounge, but tonight she hovered as Hermione slowly got out the books she’d been planning to look over, and Hermione realized that she had left several stacks of ungraded papers obscuring every seat in the room. She laughed and patted the bed next to her. “I’m sorry, I honestly meant to clear this place up a bit yesterday,” she told Luna. “I’ve just been dreadfully tired lately.”

           “Oh—that’s fine.” Strangely, Luna was almost stammering. “Er, are you sure?”

           Hermione glanced back at her to see that both of Luna’s cheeks were flushed, and her hands were twined rather nervously behind her back. “Yes, of course,” she answered, a little blankly. “Why would I mind?”

           Luna blinked rapidly and smiled widely. “Oh, no reason,” she said. “Just, you know, sometimes one’s—one’s robe can have grab—grabknacks without one knowing about it, and I wouldn’t want you to get—itchy.”

           Hermione raised an eyebrow as Luna moved jerkily closer. “I believe you made that up,” she said slowly.

           “I did not,” Luna responded immediately. “I’d never—just make something up.” Her cheeks had definitely turned bright red. “It would be—” she waved a hand, “—unethical for an expert in unusual creatures to simply make something up off the top of her head.” She looked to the side, then sighed. “Although perhaps you’re right that I don’t—exactly—believe that grabknacks exist. Their provenance was disputed as far back as the seventeenth century, and, well, by now, even people who are more open-minded about magical creatures—don’t really—think there’s much evidence…”

           “Are you all right?” Hermione asked sleepily. “I really don’t mind you sitting on my bed. I don’t mind most people sitting on my bed, really, but I especially wouldn’t mind you doing it.”

           “Especially me?” Luna echoed. “Then I won’t refuse, but, um…” She sat gingerly on the side of the bed, then sighed. “’Mione,” she said in a small voice. “I know people think I’m odd. Well, I mean. I am odd.”

           She looked suddenly sad and small and almost drooping as she sat on Hermione’s bed, her hands bunching together in the robe above her knees.

           “Yes,” Hermione agreed, sliding over to her and wondering whether she needed to be comforting. She had never been exactly good at ‘comforting.’ When Ron or Harry had problems, she was far better at offering solutions than comfort, but she was aware that sometimes people didn’t actually need their problems fixed, per se. “I mean, I suppose you’re odd, but your friends don’t mind. We like oddity. I like oddity.”

           “When I was nineteen, I kissed one of my friends, and she definitely didn’t like it,” Luna said abruptly. “You see, I thought she might like it, because I thought she might like me like that, but she didn’t. I’m not very good at knowing if someone would like me to kiss them. And it gets awkward, and people think I’m odd. Which I don’t normally mind at all, but when people don’t want to be around me because I’m odd, I sometimes get sad. Especially if they’re people I like very much.”

           Hermione stared at her, feeling her own cheeks heat just a little. She hadn’t spent much time considering romantic situations since the one with Ron imploded so horribly, and she hadn’t dwelled on the fact that the signals she and Luna had been sending each other were possibly a little less than platonic. But there had been a good deal of touching and hugging—more than Hermione was used to, or generally comfortable with, even with close friends. And the way she’d found herself looking at Luna at odd moments, even the first time she’d seen her this year, in the loo at that awful party. As if she didn’t want to look away.

           “Luna,” she said. “Erm, do you want to kiss me?”

           Luna turned to her, and Hermione was a little concerned to see that there were tears welling up her eyes. “Well, yes,” she admitted. “I want to. But I don’t want you not to want to be around me anymore.”

           “I, er,” said Hermione. She slid a hand to the side and touched the top of Luna’s hand, feeling the tight tension riding in the top of her friend’s knuckles. “Actually, I—I think I’d like to kiss you, too.”

           “You would? Really?”

           Suddenly feeling strangely shy, Hermione forced herself to nod.

           “Oh,” Luna said, smiling. “That’s very nice.” She blinked once, and a tear rolled out of her eye and down her nose. She reached up and brushed it away. “Oh, dear,” she said. “That’s awfully silly that my eyes are still doing this, then.”

           Taking a deep breath, Hermione awkwardly moved one hand up and cupped Luna’s cheek. “I honestly don’t mind,” she breathed, and she pushed the golden strands of Luna’s hair back, leaned forward, and brushed her lips against Luna’s. Before she could pull back, Luna’s hand was in her hair, and Luna was kissing her back as well, sighing into her mouth. It felt wonderful.

           Luna’s hand turned over beneath hers and laced their fingers together. Breathlessly, insistently, she kissed the corner of Hermione’s mouth. “I like this,” she said. “I like this quite a bit.”

           “Me, too,” Hermione admitted. The back of her head felt odd, though, the tiredness that she’d almost forgotten coming back with force. “Tired, though,” she mumbled. “I think I need to sleep.”

           “Oh—I’m sorry—I’ll leave you to sleep.”

           Hermione smiled hazily through the veil of sleepiness. “No, no,” she protested. “Why don’t you stay?” She still hadn’t managed to change out of her robes, had she? Oh well.

           “Are you sure? I mean—the grabknacks—”

           Giggling, still desperately sleepy, Hermione grabbed Luna’s sleeve. “Definitely sure. Don’t mind being itchy anyway.” She pulled her friend down onto the bed, curling against her immediately. The last thing she heard before the darkness claimed her was Luna’s soft, happy sigh.

[caredogstips]

10 Reasons Life Would Be Better If I Could Date My Dog

We all have those crazy-person times where we are lying in bed at night wishing our dogs were peopleand actually refuting our questions.

There is something special about the brightnes in Buster’s eye after he immerses his five beakers of nutrient and still wants your peanut butter and jellysandwich.

You have scratches all over your forearms from the excite of when you arrive home a little too late afterhe’s been waiting the working day wants to talk to you. You haven’t worn makeup in eras because you have been too busy spending time with your furry acquaintance and seeing sure hereceives the best treatment.

If onlyanimals were human.

Who need to see a nostalgics SO when you have that little hairball who climbings in your lap on a daily basis? Join me, fellow singles and animal admirers, for 10 rationales I please I could grow my doginto aboyfriend.

1. Dogsaregreat listeners.

Have a bad day? Someone in the part ingest your sandwich, or perhaps the guy in the left lane behind you decided to pass you on the right? Did you boyfriend flip you off for going to lunch with your girlfriends instead of going back to his home with him for a bit lunch-time rendezvous?

Don’t worry, your dog “il be there”, DYING to listen to all of it. Tired of calling your friends late at night for a bit chitchat? Take a bench with Buster and tell him your problems; cry out for help and be that personwho needs a good exclamation every night.

Buster “il be there” to take it and furnish endless kiss and no judgement about how you “accidentally” screwed the neighbours last-place darknes. He might give you the reviews, but at the end of the day, you are familiar with he is judgment-free and precisely wants you to be happy.

2. They don’t give a shit.

Dogs live for a few situations: passion, food, ocean and maybe a few plows here and then. What actually else is there in life? Isn’t it nice to be constantly surrounded by the individuals who don’t care and are so easygoing that you are dragged into a calm climate and feel better for the rest of the day?

Welcome to the world of doghood.

Spending hours with your hound can not only induce you happier, but oblige you focus on the things that matter.

Who maintenances if your friends just stole your vehicle? At least you have your pup, who are endeavor for love and food in life. The essentials become key. Who attends if your mom dislikes you because you got a tattoo of Hillary Duff on your fucking arm? Not Buster.

3. They love to eat, A LOT.

Who doesn’t love pigging out on a daily basis? I can assure you is not simply does your pup not mind being around you when you pig out, but he actually likes it.

Don’t worry about your judgmental pals who continue advising you about your load or health; stick to the essentials mentioned in item number two.

Enjoy your nutrient and be comforted by the caloric intake you are about to experience in a judgment-free liberal zone where there isn’t a fuck to commit or a reason to stop.

4. They cuddle you in bed.

Nothing overpowers lying down in couch at night with a person who had ever is hoping to nuzzling you. Except, we all realize we have had an experience or two where our contenders aren’t in the game. Have a problematic lover or girlfriend who isn’thaving the nestle seems, or a bad one-night stand who never called back?

Not to worry, here moves Buster crashing through the door waiting all day to cuddle with his beloved owned. Ever seem disclosed by a partner for not having cuddly friendship? Not to fear, Buster is here.

5. They DON’T leave the next morning.

They won’t leave unless they are currently on the hunt for a squirrel or chipmunk running around in your sewer outside.

6. They are loyal.

Ever deal with disloyalty from a romantic collaborator or a sidekick? Have friends who leave once they find “the one” and never come back to their old friendships? Feeling lonely in general to the point of demise and sadnes?

Instead of appearing down and not under control, get a hound, a pet, WHATEVER. You are all that live animals has, and all that itwill ever necessity. Use that restricting personality you have to givethat dog a good life, and train it well so it gets the benefit of you while you get the benefit of loyalty.

Your pet’swhole world is about you and how you are doing. Could you reckon a human being THAT preoccupied with you?

That would be downright pestering and unworldly. If “you think youre” pathetic, so is your bird-dog. If you are mad, so is Buster. Dogs are very sensitive to the fondness and the well-being of their humans.

This shapes them extremely loyal and great babies that they are able even serve as temporary husband/ lady substitutions. Why is being dealt with humen when you can deal with carefree loyal swine?

7. They’re perfect if you dislike people.

I don’t know about you beings , but I detest parties. Parties are storytellers, filled with drama, pain and arguments.

Sure, there are a few good folks out there, but not enough. The only day I’ve ever seen my pup debate with me is when hewasn’tgetting the correct therapy for a sit bid, and to be frank, I can’t blame him; I would do the same.

Going outside and into public is heartbreaking as it concerns dealing with parties and all their daily commentary and gossip that I have no interest in.

I would be perfectly happy to sit at home talking about here my puppy like the crazy maiden I am in hopes of the working day going a response rather than rely on beings in our contemporary world to entertain me.

8. They protect you.

Got a creepy-crawly neighbour checking out your mansion a little too often? Good situation Buster has grade-A protection knowledge. Not exclusively will he not make a dangerous stranger in, but if he feels anyone nearby, he will bark protectively to ensure your safety and happiness.

Not to worry, stop de-stressing knowing you have a backup to your dead shaft and that home occasion is high time for safety and coziness.

9. They are always happy.

If you are around those who are more glad, you will be more likely to be happy. Bird-dogs are generally always happy if they receive their necessaries mentioned above.

For them, life is about the small and simple-minded concepts. This, I accept, is one of the true reasons for pure happiness in life. Live low-key with simplicity and delight. Swine can easily provide this sense of satisfaction.

10. At the end, they are more excited than anyone you’ve ever matched to see youafter you get home from work.

Make sure you either have a good casing to protect yourself or a new pair of gasps to change the old-fashioned ones that were torn open when you got home yesterday.

Though bird-dogs can’t pronounce your usage, I’d betyou have a general understanding of their excite when you arrive home from piece. The daily entrance residence from academy or work is the mostexciting happening in a dog’s daily agenda.

As dogs , nothing beats having your owners come home so you can eat, hug, romp and vex the shit out of themas much as possible before they are so wearied they pass outonthe couch.

So, why not? What’s stopping you? If you’re not a fan of people, boring communications and small talk, having animals around you is good for you, and babies can definitely benefit your well-being.

Though having a little four-legged sidekick following you around the house may not give you all of the answers to wellness and pleasure, I canassure youhaving a dog can put you on the road to self-satisfaction and learning more about yourself as a person.

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[rusticrevivals]

I love the verb “to rise”.  It harbours such an Easter, springlike connotation.  Unless it’s used in the context of Richard trying to get a rise out of me, (which he likes to do multiple times in a day) this is also a beautiful NOUN, especially when used in conjunction with words like “Sunrise” or “Moonrise”.  Aren’t those lovely and romantic words?

When I stepped into the mysterious gloaming Monday night, after yet another dance rehearsal at the little New Denmark rec centre with ‘the tiara club’ (see last week’s post), the moon was just poking out over the tree line. As I drove the three miles home, the so-called “Pink Moon” (named after pink flowers called wild ground phlox, which bloom in early spring, the ‘pink moon’ is the first full moon of springtime in the Northern Hemisphere) rose very quickly in the sky, and I couldn’t take my eyes off it the whole way home. Good thing our road is so quiet there wasn’t another car on it!

We are down to less than 40 percent of the snow we’ve had all winter, now, thanks to a few good rainfalls and one day of actual double digits -with sun!  We now hear some songbirds, not just crows.  And, this morning, as I sat eating my homemade pancakes with our own fresh maple syrup from weeks of Richard’s toil’n’boil, I had to open the top of the Dutch door that Richard made last fall (see posting from Sept. 16th entitled The Dutch Door Diva, if you missed the construction of this beloved kitchen feature)  and listen to the ‘rise’ and swell of jubilant bird song in the air.

my breakfast this morning, with top of door open to hear birds

As I bake bread, nearly every 2nd day, the word “Rise” is especially important to me. I’ve discovered that, as I’d once thought in my 20s when I used to regularly bake bread, the amount of rise is NOT as important, especially if you like to eat toast and sandwiches as we do.  You don’t have to ‘cater’ to the yeast as much as you might think, although it SHOULD be warm water it dissolves in, and a sprinkling of sugar will help excite it further! But if the bread rises TOO much over the loaf pans, you’ll not be able to cut it as easily, nor to fit it into the toaster!  Thus, I try for a good ‘first’ rise, and just a quick one after the initial punch-down.  (Of course this also depends on the amount of white/vs.wholewheat flour I’m using. This past week I ran out of white, and as Richard and I hate JUST plain whole wheat, I zested the bread up with some cardamon, parsley, thyme and oregano. I didn’t put it in a loaf pan, either, just made it in a circle on the baking sheet and let it rise a bit there. Try it, it was fabulous!)  As the sale at the rec centre last Saturday morning was my (Rustic Revivals’) first one in this province, I made a lot of Easter-oriented and spring items. And one of the ones of which I’m most proud is the following cushion which I stitched by hand from a flour sack. I  then stencilled a double meaning on to the thick linen, so that it could be for general use, or as a special Easter gift.  It didn’t sell at the sale, so I can enjoy it further, I guess.

For readers in Ontario, there is a wonderful group around the Toronto area called “R.I.S.E.” which a few theatre-grad friends of mine have volunteered with in the past:  “Reaching Intelligent Souls Everywhere (RISE) is a community led by youth, comprised of artists, activists, free-thinkers and revolutionaries. Together, they help to create a safe and welcoming platform for self-expression and healing through the performance arts.” This is, of course, ‘right up my alley’ – but since I’m now living out here in ‘boonesville’, where my heart is, I am trying to do what I can.  As discussed last week when revealing the small amount of young people’s performance art (ie: “The Tiara Club”) that I’m working with here in this small rural community, the sense of being close to nature and the “rustique” of our agricultural history is important here, and that’s one of the things I love about being in the mountains.  Local photographer Tiffany Christensen blends my two passions frequently in her work.  Nature and Rustic. Love it!

As presented in last week’s blog …”Purty Pals and Gingham Gals”, Tiffany will ‘rise’ to any occasion and is being especially helpful as we move forward to the Founder’s Day celebrations this year here in this peaceful valley.  And her last name, while being both indicative of the many Danish names in the community AND the true meaning of Easter is a happy circumstance at the time of this writing.  “Risen” is even there in her name!

The above is the 3rd tobacco slat cross I’ve made from the weathered sticks I was offered from my Ontario cousins, Pete and Linda Baxter, when they were moving from their own farm.  I am so pleased Richard agreed to let me bring so much of this wood with us out here, and two of these crosses have now fittingly, I think, gone to Reverend Diane of Carlisle, ON and Pastor Ralph, of New Denmark, N.B.

Of course when you mention “Easter” and “Rise” in the same sentence, it isn’t always a positive thing. Christ died for our sins, true, and then rose to live forever in us, for us.  But sometimes, sadly, it is just about death. Period.  As we do not have television here, we enjoy a wonderful BBC feed through various online sources, which we then project to Richard’s large screen.   One of my favourite British serials is Lark RISE to Candleford.  If you haven’t seen it, but are a fan of period costume drama, find a way to view the whole series.  (available at many libraries, and also, in part, online – or you could buy the box set!) However, I have recently become enamored with the u.k. version (original one!) of “Who Do You Think You Are”?  I do NOT consider this a ‘reality show’, so please don’t suggest it is! I find it a stimulating way to learn history.  Watching it  led to the revealing of several of our favourite Irish performers’ ancestors such as Brendan O’Carroll (the hilarious Mrs. Brown of ‘Mrs. Brown’s Boys) being involved in the Easter Risings of 1916, and I was thus motivated to read and study more about that particular unrest.  Yeats’ poem “Easter: 1916” ends so solemnly, despite the green of  the Emerald Isle and the new spring:  “Now and in time to be, Wherever green is worn, Are changed, changed utterly:  A terrible beauty is born”.

Then, this week of course was yet another 100th anniversary – that of Vimy Ridge, which also took place originally over Easter weekend.  Mom/Joy was especially interested in this as her great-uncle died there, and I was pleased that CBC did a live stream which she could also enjoy from her laptop computer.  So, Easter is about rising, but also about the fallen.   However,  just as the Canadians were important ‘rising’ to the top of Vimy Ridge a century ago, so are our Canadians poignant in their passion for standing up for what is right in all things crucial to the survival of man-kind:

(Rise up, Rise up) Oh rise and show your power, (Rise up, Rise up) We're dancing into the sun (Rise up, Rise up) It's time for celebration (Rise up, Rise up) Spirits' time has come... ...Talkin 'bout the right time to be workin' for peace, Wantin' all the tension in the world to ease. - by Canadian band, Parachute Club

 I love those lyrics, and while I’ve hardly been considered a pop-music fan, the late 1970s and early 1980s WERE about the only time when I listened to such music. Those words have always stayed with me (as well as the ‘catchy’ tune to which they were sung).  And now that Trumpty Dumbty is tumbling from his wall, I believe we must indeed work harder than ever for peace.  And, as spring is here, we must ‘dance into the sun’, as it’s ‘time for celebration’.  I tried hard, at my Rustic Revivals’ booth last week, to make a ‘new’ and ‘springlike’ impression:

I put more colour (light pastels) into my pieces than ever before, and tried to think of inspirational/springlike words for salvaged pieces of wood (‘dream’ is painted on an old dove-tailed drawer-piece, and the rusty flower on the ‘bloom’ sign is an old car part I found along the side of the road and banged into that shape).

As for the Easter wreath (bottom left of the ‘booth’ pic above), as well as having a barnboard cross on it, I also added some pastel colour with some recycled craft pieces (ie: bird’s nest with ‘eggs’, sign with ‘hope’ and some baby chicks, etc) .  Furthermore, I also did several pieces in actual COLOUR (totally new to the Rustic Revivals’ precedent!)

The only colour I could say I’ve really put on to any project before now was my salvage art LOVE sign, which I’ve always thought was fun:

And I’m especially proud of the ‘new’ spindle and finial ornaments (candle holders glued together from pieces given me by former choir mate, Ron, so thus ‘salvaged’, though he bought them new for his own projects and never used them).  They again make me think of ‘rise’, as I’ve had to glue both the ornaments and the candleholders into twos and threes to make them higher, before painting them with the two colours necessary for ‘crackling’ and distressing. (You need an acrylic undercoat, usually darker, then the ‘crackle’ mix, which you CAN make yourself, before adding the final coat.) These add that pastel colour to the spring line, pastels of course replicating the colours of spring flowers and birds’ eggs in nests.

Did any Rustic Revivals’ followers ever think they’d see so much colour mixed in to my shabby chic and primitive concepts?  (The rusty hearts were cut from old rusty paint can lids found on this very farm!)  But it IS spring!

And speaking of birds, bird song, and bird houses/nests, I did several of them as well, and the primitive ‘willow’ tree did sell, though not the others, I was sorry to say. Especially since Richard put so much effort into the design and building of these two wonderful houses, also made from my Baxter cousins’ barnboard.

And, we couldn’t really have an Easter show without SOME semblance of bunnies, chicks and lambs, so here they are:

While all of the above are made entirely from salvage items, scraps or from nature itself, I AM proud that they are newly-made or upcycled for this year’s ‘spring’, despite having many other spring items (even MADE from rusty springs from a sleigh’s old seat, for instance!) and including fishing and canoeing-themed items, gardening items, etc.  All ‘springy’.  But, when examining again the true meaning of Easter, I was happy to put a little folk-art New Denmark scene with the two landmark churches on top of the next hill-top.  Both churches have crosses on top of them in real life, and both have them painted on as well. This was done on a small cutting board of Mom/Joy’s that she wanted to dispose of.  This is only half the board:

This scene depicts the ploughing, planting and cheerful green-growth that happens around the farms in the early spring.  As you  may have read in my post “Blue Belldon Basement Grow Op.” several weeks ago, things were planted down there that are now beginning to ‘rise’ as well!

And also, chosen to add cheeriness to my kitchen window, and almost perpetually NOT blooming, even my red geranium has decided to ‘rise’ to the occasion of SPRING!

Thus, as my father used to joyously quote (in an Ogden Nash burst of silliness, though it is NOT written by that poet) :

"Spring is Sprung, The grass is RIZ - I wonder where The birdies is? " or, of a less silly subject matter, is George Herbert's "Easter".

Easter –

Rise heart: thy Lord is risen. Sing his praise Without delayes, Who takes thee by the hand, that thou likewise With him mayst rise: That, as his death calcined thee to dust, His life may make thee gold, and much more just.

Awake, my lute, and struggle for thy part With all thy art. The crosse taught all wood to resound his name, Who bore the same. His stretched sinews taught all strings, what key Is best to celebrate this most high day.

Consort both heart and lute, and twist a song Pleasant and long: Or since all music is but three parts vied And multiplied; O let thy blessed Spirit bear a part, And make up our defects with his sweet art.

I got me flowers to straw thy way; I got me boughs off many a tree: But thou wast up by break of day, And brought’st thy sweets along with thee.

The sunne arising in the East, Though he give light, & th’East perfume; If they should offer to contest With thy arising, they presume.

Can there be any day but this, Though many sunnes to shine endeavour? We count three hundred, but we misse: There is but one, and that one ever.

R I S E : the Risings of Yeast, and Yeats and Yeshua I love the verb "to rise".  It harbours such an Easter, springlike connotation.  Unless it's used in the context of Richard trying to get a rise out of me, (which he likes to do multiple times in a day) this is also a beautiful NOUN, especially when used in conjunction with words like "Sunrise" or "Moonrise".